#Nagoski Sisters

[tam--lin]

Headcanons: The Leverage team as readers

Nate: Nate's not a big reader, but will occasionally read dense some dense new tome on white collar crime or US politics. Once a year or so, he'll crack open a dense sci-fi classic like Neuromancer.

Sophie: Has a whole shelf of acting books like Blumenfeld's Accents for Actors and that collection on Stella Adler. She reads memoirs of various famous people for work - it's a great way to pick up tidbits of flavor she can bring to cons. When not reading for work, Sophie's partial to untranslated foreign-language literature, especially Russian. We know how she feels about wellness scams specifically, so I think she's read books like The Gospel of Wellness. She has a battered copy of the Nagoski sisters Burnout next to a small library of workout DVDs. When she's really down in the dumps, she'll pick up a romance with half-dressed men and women in bodices on the cover. She sometimes picks up books like The Body Keeps the Score and Unmasking Autism, which she reads mainly to leave sitting around the office in the hopes that some specific other person will read them.

Hardison: Hardison loves modern science fiction, although he generally avoids anything that's too technical because he can't keep himself from picking it apart. (The exception is Andy Weir. He loves Andy Weir.) He likes Star Trek tie-in novels (only the good ones), Cixin Liu, Ann Leckie, and The Expanse. He'll also occasionally dip his toes into scientist or astronaut memoir or non-fiction about crime (he likes Mike Massimino's memoir and tell-alls on Theranos and Scientology, specifically). He loves Murderbot and has somehow managed to convince both Parker and Eliot to read it.

Eliot: Eliot wouldn't deny reading, but you certainly won't catch him doing it. He's partial to food-related microhistories - he's read every Mark Kurlansky book. He's read Emily Nagoski's Come as You Are and is not ashamed about it. He has a sticky-noted, dog-eared copies of The Professional Chef and Mastering the Art of French Cooking in his kitchen, but nothing else - beyond the basics, he mostly cooks on vibes. Every language he knows he's either learned through whatever the US government recommends or through an ex. He read the first Murderbot book because he lost a bet to Hardison. He'll never confess to also having read all of the rest of them, and enjoying them.

Parker: Parker is either reading nothing or spending all her free time reading - there's nothing in between. She's read a few books on crypto because she wants to understand it, but she just doesn't get the appeal. (It's not cash, you see.) Parker has also read all of the Murderbot books, because Hardison got her into them. Parker loves Murderbot.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hello sex witch! Long time listener, first time caller, love how you do the teaching you do 😄

I was having a chat with my (college age) sibling, and I found she might have some... skewed views on the morality of being sexual. Think along the lines of purity culture, with a sprinkling of religious teaching, and a dash of how legality/morality must be intertwined. I know that sort of thing can lead to some unhealthy thinking, and honestly, I'm a little worried!

This is just background for context, I'm not asking you to solve or even unpack all that lol. But I really vibe with your stance on sex-neutrality, and it seems like a good concept to introduce her too. Like, a lil'nudge.

My personal sex-neutality mindset was gained over years of life experience and internet osmosis, which is really difficult to condense into a "quick-start guide," given I've never really had to educate on it before. I mean, I'll start with the definition, but she would probably prefer having sources other than just me talking for hours lol.

So. TL;DR. As an educator, do you happen to have any resources you could point me towards on sex-neuteality? Books, websites, podcasts, previous posts..? Things I could pass along?

Thank you so much sorry for the length

hey anon,

this is a tricky one because, as you said, sex neutrality is something that comes about from a lifetime of nurturing influences. adopting a totally new mindset is rarely something that can be adopted by one book or video essay, no matter how good they are. this is especially true in the face of religious influence, which can be very difficult to tactfully circumvent without making someone feel as if they're being criticized for being religious at all.

just having a figure in their life (that's you!) who's willing to start and engage with non-judgmental discussions about sexuality can be really helpful for people unlearning sexual stigma, so congrats to you for doing the hardest work just by being present!

having said that, you can't do everything and a recommended media list never hurts. there isn't a lot of work (that I'm familiar with, at least) that just sit you right down and say "hey. here's why sex neutrality good," so I'm going to drop work where that's sort of a powerful background radiation.

Emily Nagoski's book Come As Your Are is a pretty great guide for cis women learning to get comfortable with their bodies and sexualities and, more importantly, the possibilities of communication to find a relationship and sexual style that works for them! I really like the way Nagoski normalizes such a wide range of different needs and desires while assuring readers that there's no "wrong" approach; it's very comforting! if your sister is a podcast person, Nagoski also has an eight part podcast series of the same name where she debunks myths and answers more questions about sexuality.

actually hi as long as we're talking about podcasts Kate Lister, a historian who specializes in historical records of sex work, has a terribly fun podcast called Betwixt the Sheets that's nothing but sex friendly fun. it's got enough interesting historical meat to it that it's not even obvious sex neutral propaganda on the surface; some of my favorite episodes have Lister interviewing other academics about Queen Victoria's dietary habits and Hollywood portrayals of vodun.

if we want to talk about the 101 of getting comfortable with one's own genitalia and reproductive health, I must point to Dr. Jennifer Gunter's Vagina Bible. Dr. Gunter has made a whole career out of debunking medical misinformation, wellness scams, and Goop over on twitter. I think she should be allowed to attack Gwyneth Paltrow with a sword but I can't make that happen so I can at least promote her book.

if your sister starts feeling adventurous, Dr. Lindsey Doe's youtube channel Sexplanations has been a formative influence on me and has years worth of videos covering tons of topics in quick, unabashedly enthusiastic bursts of information. this video where Dr. Doe talks about her own instances of internalized sex negativity could be an excellent starting point, especially if you want to discuss it together like a lil youtube bookclub.

for a longer youtube dive, Khadija Mbowe's ruminations on sex positive feminism, its shortcomings, and which parts they see as worth preserving could also be a great point of conversation, especially for someone whose coming into the conversation not identifying with sex positivity. caveat that they do link to Christine Emba's book Rethinking Sex in the video description and I cannot in good conscience recommend or fuck with that at all, sorry.

Angela Chen's book Ace, about asexuality, is genuinely so so wonderful, and I think required reading for anyone trying to make sense of any kind of sexuality.

Meg-John Barker's book Rewriting the Rules is a maybe a more expansive version of Nagoski's book, less focused on sex and much more interested in expanding ideas of what relationships can look like and encouraging personal expression within them. honestly I think that's a really important part of embracing sex negativity - more compassion and less judgment for yourself can lead to more compassion and less judgment for others, right? right, hopefully.

Jaclyn Friedman's book Unscrewed is a delight, and does something similar to Mbowe's video linked above by highlighting ways in which commercialized #girlboss "sex positivty" is useless and then providing instances of real people doing actual, tangibly useful and positive work. Friedman highlights everything from queer youth shelters to orgs run by and for trans sex workers of color to reproductive justice organizations; it's a great dip into a lot of different radical causes without (hopefully) being too overwhelming.

I hope this serves as a good starting place for a lot of positive conversations with your sibling! good luck, friend xoxo

[elenjaxx]

Burnout, Nagoski sisters

I started reading some books about healing and understanding the shady parts of our brains. Here is one of them -Burnout, by the Nagoski Sisters-,with what seems to be a summary and my opinions. I hope this helps you to decide if you want to read further. Enjoy your readings!

(en español debajo)

Above all, this book explains the primary causes of emotional exhaustion, which is one of the most impactful health crises of this century. The most important idea is that we struggle to break the cycle of stress. Thus, the book proposes mediums to control the stress cycles or, the other way around, how to avoid being controlled by them.  

Try to Close the Stress Cycle. 

This chapter explains that stress is a survival tool: the hormones released help you to run fast and regulate your body. Just by a simple hyperventilation your body is looking for an extra boost of oxygen to run away. However, nowadays it is easy to stay in stress mode and sadly maintaining that mode starts health issues: cardiovascular, digestive, endocrine or mental. The author thus proposes two solutions: exercise and creative expression. The former tricks your body into thinking it doesn’t need to use the flight or fight response because the extra energy was already spent on exercising. The latter helps to dispel the mental fog. Other vital options are, as the author says, “hugs and laughter”. 

2. Fight Stress by Building your Resilience.

The author reintroduces the key to happiness that Martin Selignman suggested: giving meaning to your life. There are no right or wrong meanings, but there must always be something. As a consequence, sometimes we find meaning in helping others, though that sacrifices our own individuality. Nagoski explains this as the Human Giver Syndrome, and believes that women usually suffer from it the most. The conclusion she arrives to is that we cannot let others punish us for finding our own meaning rather than falling into said syndrome.

3. Emotional Exhaustion Leads to Burnout. 

If your own demands and expectations can be emotionally exhausting, expectations by your family and friends brings this feeling to the edge. Emotional exhaustion leads to depersonalization and a decreased sense of accomplishment. The tunnel works here as a metaphor. When you see no end, you become exhausted and stop in the middle of the journey.

4. Rest Helps you Avoid Exhaustion.

Nagoski believes that the saying “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” is outdated, since it leads you to exhaustion. Thus, she suggests, above all, good sleep. However, there are other ways to be productive while resting, that is: cleaning, running errands or cooking. The general idea is to do something different. For example, the author wrote this book to rest from writing fiction. Finally, she insists that sleep is crucial, for the benefits of exercise grow while sleeping, as well as the information learned that day is processed while we rest. 

5. Fight Unrealistic Expectations With Facts. 

Exhaustion is connected to our expectations. Describing huge challenges as easy will definitely drain you, so we must define our expectations accordingly and not undermine our challenges.

6. The Bikini Industrial Complex.

This is the name that the author gives to the expectations towards women, such as body ideals. The author argues with the idea of BMI to measure health and presents The Lancet’s study, which found out that overweight individuals had lower health issues than underweight people. 

7. We All Need People in Our Lives

Nagoski believes that seeing independence as success is in fact a big mistake: we are not going to perform our best if we are lonely and isolated. However, we cannot allow ourselves to be surrounded by others that depend on our abilities either. The perfect balance is a bit of both. Besides, the author explains that connections provide support, opportunities and new information. However, it is more important the quality of those connections than the quantity. 

8. Use Positive Reappraisal

To tackle stress you have to develop a strong understanding of the difference between stress and stressors, the latter being what you can actually control. Stressors can be dimmed if we schedule activities post work, for instance, such as going to the gym. Moreover, positive reappraisal could counteract stressors, such as reframing a difficult situation to find positive opportunities. All in all, seeking facts and truths is the ideal way to manage stressors.

 9. Use Planful Problem-Solving

It involves analyzing a situation filled with stressors and identifying how you can solve them or lessen frustration. Above all, a plan to prevent the impact of stressors. However, the author insists that we have to recognize struggle and remember that there is always personal growth.

10. Practice Self-Compassion

Although some self-criticism can help you improve, it can quickly sift into toxicity. It seems a good idea to personalize that toxicity as someone else that isn’t you: you can give it a name, traits and quirks, but recognize it is not yourself. That distance sparks the first steps towards healing, which always has a conclusion, a final meaning. In other words, self compassion will give you strength and will allow you to be joyful. Happiness is unsustainable because it is momentary, whereas joy stays strong if we feel gratitude towards our life.

My thoughts about this reading: 

Positive:

>The reading is easy: its grammar and vocabulary are on a medium level, which is ideal for non english natives, teens or basically people who don’t want to melt their brains in a leisure activity.

>It is refreshing to see therapy tricks in these types of books. The final chapter compresses the most important information because it actually provides you with a tool that works for everybody.

Negative:

>The other tools provided seem to be taken out of an Instagram set of tips. Everybody knows that doing exercise and sleeping is important, but when you are depressed, those things hold no meaning. I would have put the final chapter at the beginning, for it is the first step towards healing, not the last. 

>I would have loved to read about more burnout from trauma. I think the body image is an important stressor indeed, but I also believe there are more traumas the readers want to identify with. Family expectations are mentioned but, for instance, the gifted kid burnout is never explored. Body image is focused on women, which indeed makes it worse for sure, but being a contemporary book as this is, I think it should have delved into the marvel male body image too if the author wanted to expand its audience. 

I generally liked it and would recommend it, but this book is something you should read from libraries before deciding if it is important enough for you to buy it, for not all tips seem mind blowing. 

What do you think? If you have read the book or listened to one of their talks, do you want to share something? If you didn't would you explore their ideas?

He empezado a leer algunos libros para limpiar la cabecita de suciedad y entenderme mejor. Este es uno de ellos -Burnout, by the Nagoski Sisters-, con lo que creo que es un resumen y mis opiniones. Espero que esto te ayude a decidir si quieres leer más. Disfruta de tus lecturas!

“Cenizas Mentales”, Emily Nagoski: resumen

En términos generales, este libro explica las causas principales de una de las mayores crisis en la salud general: el agotamiento emocional. La idea más importante es lo difícil que nos resulta romper los bucles de estrés. Por eso, este libro propone ideas para controlar esos bucles de estrés y también nos indica cómo hacer lo contrario: no dejar que nos controlen.

Procura Romper los Bucles de Estrés. 

El capítulo presenta el estrés como una herramienta de supervivencia: las hormonas que se utilizan en el estrés permiten al cuerpo correr rápido y prepararse para un ataque. Con una simple hiperventilación, el cuerpo busca un extra de oxígeno para salir huyendo. Sin embargo, actualmente es bastante sencillo quedarse atrapados en el estrés, provocando problemas de salud relacionados con el corazón, el tracto digestivo, problemas endocrinos o mentales. Por lo tanto, la autora propone dos soluciones: el ejercicio y la creatividad. El primero engaña al cuerpo para que piense que los beneficios del estrés no son necesarios, ya que se han agotado en el ejercicio físico. El último es una forma de aclarar la mente. Otras opciones importantes según la autora son “abrazos y risas”. 

2. Desarrolla Resiliencia para Combatir el Estrés

La autora nos introduce a las ideas sobre la felicidad de Martin Selignman, quien proponía que la clave estaba en buscar un significado a la vida. Insistía en que no hay buenos o malos significados, pero que siempre tiene que haber algo. Como consecuencia, muchos encontramos ese significado ayudando a los demás, pero esto acaba sepultando nuestras propias necesidades. Nagoski tacha esto del Síndrome del Humano Entregado, y opina que las mujeres son quienes más lo sufren. Por último, llega a la conclusión de que no podemos dejar que otros nos castiguen por buscar ese significado para nuestra vida, y que tampoco podemos encerrarnos en este síndrome para evitar el castigo de los demás. 

3. El Cansancio Emocional solo Deja Cenizas en tu Cabeza.

Si ya de por sí tus propias exigencias y expectativas son emocionalmente agotadoras, las expectativas de tus relaciones sociales te van a llevar al límite. El cansancio emocional provoca una despersonalización y una sensación de que todos tus logros son en vano. La autora aquí utiliza la metáfora del túnel: cuando no ves el final del camino, te cansas y te paras a la mitad del trayecto. 

4. Descansar Evita ese Agotamiento.

Nagoski cree que “lo que no te mata te hace más fuerte” es un dicho ya anticuado, porque lo que hace es llevarte hasta el agotamiento. Por ello, sugiere solucionarlo con buenas horas de sueño. Sin embargo, hay otras formas de ser productivos y descansar: limpiar, hacer recados, cocinar. La idea general aquí es que debemos hacer algo diferente a lo que nos estresa. Por ejemplo, la autora escribió este libro como descanso de escribir ficción. Finalmente, vuelve a insistir en la importancia del sueño, ya que los beneficios del ejercicio funcionan mientras dormimos, así como la información recibida durante el día se procesa en el inconsciente. 

5. Utiliza la Verdad contra Las Altas Expectativas.

El agotamiento está conectado a tus expectativas. Describir grandes retos como simples actividades va a exprimirte, así que debemos definir nuestras expectativas acorde al reto que se nos presenta, y no hacerlo más pequeño de lo que es.  

6. El Bikini Capitalista.

Así describe la autora a las expectativas sobre el cuerpo de la mujer. Nagoski está en contra del IMC como herramienta para medir la salud y como argumento nos presenta el estudio de The Lancet, el cual prueba que las personas con sobrepeso tienen menos riesgos de salud que las personas en infrapeso. 

7. Todos Necesitamos a Alguien.

Nagoski piensa que ver la independencia como sinónimo del éxito es en realidad un craso error: no vamos a hacerlo mejor por estar alejados y solos. Sin embargo, tampoco podemos rodearnos de otros que dependan de nuestras habilidades. El equilibrio perfecto está en tener un poco de ambos. Además, la autora indica que las relaciones nos proveen de apoyo, oportunidades y nueva información. Sin embargo, lo más importante es la calidad de esas relaciones, no la cantidad.  

8. Sé Realista con el Problema.

Para luchar contra el estrés, lo primero que tenemos que hacer es diferenciarlo de los factores estresantes, que son lo que podemos controlar. Estos factores pueden hacerse más pequeños si planeamos actividades después del trabajo, como ir al gimnasio. Además, ser realistas con el problema nos ayuda a reevaluar la situación para encontrar los puntos positivos. Después de todo, buscar la verdad y los hechos es lo ideal para controlar esos factores estresantes. 

9. Haz un Plan para Resolver el Problema.

Debemos analizar los factores estresantes e identificar las formas de resolverlos o al menos no dejar que nos frustren tanto. En otras palabras, reconocer que los problemas existen y  que siempre hay espacio en ellos para el crecimiento personal. 

10. Trátate con Cariño.

Aunque algo de crítica personal puede ayudarte a mejorar, rápidamente se puede convertir en toxicidad. Sería una buena idea personalizarla, darle una voz y unos gestos, para entender que esa toxicidad no somos nosotros, sino un ser externo. Al marcar esa distancia también abrimos camino a la curación cuyo final es encontrar esa definición personal. En otras palabras, al tratarnos con cariño, encontramos la fuerza y las ganas de disfrutar. La felicidad es temporal, pero el disfrute sigue en pie mientras agradezcamos lo que tenemos. 

Mi opinión: 

Positiva:

>La lectura es sencilla: la gramática y el vocabulario tienen un nivel intermedio, ideal para no nativos del idioma, adolescentes o básicamente gente que no quiere fundir sus neuronas en una actividad relajante.

>Es un soplo de aire fresco ver consejos de terapia reales en este tipo de libros. El capítulo final tiene la información más importante del libro, ya que facilita una herramienta que funciona para todo el mundo. 

Negativa:

>Las otras herramientas parecen una lista de consejos de Instagram. Todo el mundo sabe que el ejercicio y el sueño son importantes pero, bajo un trastorno depresivo, estos no tienen significado alguno. Yo hubiera puesto el capítulo final al principio, porque es el primer paso para curarse, no el último. 

>Me hubiera encantado leer más sobre el trauma. Creo que los ideales físicos son factores estresantes importantes, pero opinio que hay más traumas con los que el lector se puede identificar. Por ejemplo, se mencionan las expectativas familiares o de trabajo, pero no se explora la figura del estudiante brillante fracasado. Además, la imagen corporal se focaliza en las mujeres y, aunque opino que lo tienen peor y es realmente importante hablar de ello, para ser un libro contemporáneo le falta hablar de la figura imposible que Marvel vende a los cuerpos masculinos, si quiere expandir su audiencia. 

En términos generales me gusta y recomiendo su lectura, pero creo que este libro debe leerse primero en una biblioteca antes de decidir si para ti es lo suficientemente importante como para comprarlo. 

¿Qué opinas tú? Si te has leído el libro o escuchado alguna de las charlas de las autoras, ¿quieres compartir algo? Si no lo has hecho, ¿explorarías sus ideas?

[blogbibliophilia]

📖Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle by Emily Nagoski PhD and Amelia Nagoski DMA

•

Book Length: 273 pages

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Review: I saw the title of this book and knew that I had to read it because I am currently in the season of burnout and wanted to hear what these two smart sisters had to say regarding the subject of burnout. The chapters were broken into three parts regarding burnout in career, relationships, and everyday life. There were plenty of gems of wisdom throughout this book mixed with personal stories and evidence from the peer-reviewed literature (grateful for the inclusion of a reference section in the back of the book). There were some sobering parts of the book and some lighthearted parts which gave a nice balance to what can be a heavy topic to discuss. Burnout is real and it does take work to overcome. These sisters give us hope!

[lqb2reads]

People who don't trust or are untrustworthy are energy drains. - burnout, nagoski sisters

[devianbooks]

(PDF) [Download] Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle BY : Emily Nagoski

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Description

This groundbreaking book explains why women experience burnout differently than men?and provides a simple, science-based plan to help women minimize stress, manage emotions, and live a more joyful life.Burnout. Many women in America have experienced it. What?s expected of women and what it?s really like to be a woman in today?s world are two very different things?and women exhaust themselves trying to close the gap between them. How can you ?love your body? when every magazine cover has ten diet tips for becoming ?your best self?? How do you ?lean in? at work when you?re already operating at 110 percent and aren?t recognized for it? How can you live happily and healthily in a sexist world that is constantly telling you you?re too fat, too needy, too noisy, and too selfish?Sisters Emily Nagoski, PhD, and Amelia Nagoski, DMA, are here to help end the cycle of feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. Instead of asking us to ignore the very real obstacles and societal pressures that stand

[lmncyok]

Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle - Emily Nagoski

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by Emily Nagoski.

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Ebook PDF Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle | EBOOK ONLINE DOWNLOAD Hello Book lovers, If you want to download free Ebook, you are in the right place to download Ebook. Ebook Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle EBOOK ONLINE DOWNLOAD in English is available for free here, Click on the download LINK below to download Ebook Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle 2020 PDF Download in English by Emily Nagoski (Author).

 Description Book: 

THIS GROUND BREAKING AUDIOBOOK EXPLAINS WHY WOMEN EXPERIENCE BURNOUT DIFFERENTLY THAN MEN - AND PROVIDES A SIMPLE, SCIENCE-BASED PLAN TO HELP WOMEN MINIMIZE STRESS, MANAGE EMOTIONS, AND LIVE A MORE JOYFUL LIFE."Essential reading." (Bustle)NAMED ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR BY 'BOOK RIOT''BURNOUT'. Many women in America have experienced it. What's expected of women and what it's really like to be a woman in today's world are two very different things - and women exhaust themselves trying to close the gap between them. How can you 'love your body" when every magazine cove has 10 diet tips for becoming "your best self"? How do you "lean in" at work when you'r already operating at 110 percent and aren't recognized for it? How can you live happily and healthily in a sexist world that is constantly telling you you'r e too fat, too needy, too noisy, and too selfish?Sisters Emily Nagoski, PhD, and Amelia Nagoski, DMA, are here to help end the cycle of feeling overwhelmed and exhausted.

[firstumcschenectady]

"God, Stress, and Abundant Lives” based on 1 Kings 19:4-8

I'm mad. Mad that we – the big collective we – might have beaten this virus if we trusted our experts and prioritized collective well-being. Mad that we “can't have nice things” still, EVEN THOUGH science provided amazing vaccines in an unbelievably short time. Mad that I have to make decisions no one– including me – likes because the first rule of John Wesley is “first do no harm” and I really believe we have to do that.

But, a friend sent an article this week that pointed out that I'm not mad. I just think I'm mad. Or, more so, that anger is a secondary emotion that works well to mask primary emotions. The article said the emotion that I'm actually feeling is fear. (Note: do not try this at home. Do not tell someone what they're “really feeling” when they tell you what they ARE feeling. Really, truly. DO NOT DO THIS. The article got away with it by taking about generic people and I personalized.) The article speaks about people choosing not to be vaccinated and vaccinated people's anger responses:

Though this new flavor of outrage might look and sound like righteous indignation, mental health professionals say that what’s behind it is fear.

“It’s scary to admit that somebody else has power over you and you’re at their mercy and you’re afraid of them, but showing that is not a very American ideal,” said David Rosmarin, an associate professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and a clinician at McLean Hospital. “Instead of expressing that fear, it’s a lot more comfortable to blame somebody else.”

Anger is what people in his profession refer to as a “secondary emotion.” It’s a feeling that arises in response to a more primal emotion, like fear and anxiety over having some aspect of your life threatened. “The reality is that there are millions of people who are miseducated about something, they’re making a big mistake that will have massive consequences that might affect you and your family and that makes you scared,” Rosmarin said. “But nobody is saying that.”1

That article also says that part of what people are struggling with is that this was always going to be a “long war” but we didn't get that message from the outset. That fits for me too, I deal better when I have my expectations set correctly.

Two years ago I preached on this passage from 1 Kings 19, and afterwards several of you mentioned that you could hear in it my yearning for a break. (It was fairly soon before my renewal leave.) I hadn't meant to be that transparent then, and it makes me want to be a little bit cautious now, but....the story hasn't changed.

This remains a story of Elijah, prophet of God who has worked diligently for what he believed God wanted him to do. The response to his faithfulness has been a threat of murder that came directly from the palace.

Elijah is too tired to fight anymore. He fled for his life, but in the midst of the flight he lost even the will to live.

He prays, asking God to let him die, which would at least be less violent than the death otherwise planned for him. He'd walked into the desert for a day, and when he prayed he sat under a single broom tree, the only bit of respite he could find. The Bible seems to suggest this is a particularly sad story, it is the same one told of Hagar, having walked into the desert, exhausted her provisions, sat under a broom, and prepared to die. Just like with Hagar though, God meets Elijah there.

You may already know how much I love this story. He falls asleep, and wakes up when provisions have arrived. He eats, he drinks, he falls back asleep. When he awakes, provisions have arrived. He eats, he drinks, AND THEN he was able to go on.

I really love that he needs to sleep, eat, drink, sleep, eat, and drink before he can rouse himself. He has gone far beyond the “have a cup of coffee and keep going” point. He is exhausted. He is out of will power. He is out of a will to LIVE. If I were writing this story though, I'd add in some breathing. “He took intentional deep breathes until he was able to slow his body enough to sleep...” and then the rest of the story. It would make it just a smidge better.

Probably because of the book I just read, I'm noticing that the story as written (and more so as adapted), Elijah is given the chance to “complete the stress cycle” in this story. The book is “Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle” written by Emily and Amelia Nagoski. In their opening chapter, they distinguish between stressors and stress. They point out that we need to complete the stress cycle, no matter what is happening with the stressors. And they name, concretely, how to do that. The first and best option is to “do literally anything to move your body enough to get you breathing deeply” for 20-60 minutes a day.2 Elijah walking into the desert for an entire day seems to qualify.

The Nagoski sisters offer 6 other ways to complete the cycle though: 1. “deep, slow breaths down regulate the stress response”3, 2. positive social encounters (even causal ones), 3. laughter – but the real deep belly laughter kind, 4. physical affection from someone you trust (they suggest a 6 second kiss between partners or a 20 second hug with someone you like, snuggling a pet), 5. crying, and 6. creative expression. In other chapters they also talk about meditation and spiritual connection, so I'm going to add a #7 – whatever prayer practices work for you. They're suggesting that we do at least one of these, and better many of these, every day. Because the stressors keep coming at us. And their book was written in 2019, so it is WAY MORE TRUE today.

So Elijah. He took a long walk (check), I'm all for pretending he took some slow breaths, he maybe had a positive encounter with the angel? (does that count??), and I'm quite sure he cried a lot, the Bible just forgot to mention it. He also took care of his bodily needs for rest, nourishment, and hydration. (Chapter 7 of their book is all about rest.) He also named his despair to God, and naming emotions has a lot of power too.

This little story has a lot of good responses to despair and burnout. Which is good, because many of us are in despair and/or burnout in at least some aspects of our lives.

The pandemic has challenged all of us. The challenges have differed, because we're different, but we've all been challenged. Having another wave is definitely not helping anybody. We're mad, whether or not that's a primary emotion, sad, fearful, and maybe even detached. We're exhausted.

And most of us are comfort seeking. We want things to be easier. We NEED things to be easier. We're looking for things that sooth, ease, comfort, and console. Often, we're looking for things to be “back to normal,” familiar, and make sense like we're used to. We're human. That's how we work.

Another facet of how we work is that when we're in high stress, we revert to earlier and lower levels of emotional functioning. We blame. We over react. We fight. We flee. We gossip. We triangulate. We take all our anxiety and we try to get rid of it by sharing it with others or throwing it at them. This too is human. It is how we work.

No one I know is operating at their best right now. We can't.

What we can do is seek to complete the stress cycles – we can't change most of the stressors, but we can give ourselves the best possible chance to change the stress. Our bodies, minds, and spirits are all connected, they're all “us.” When we care for each of them, we give all of them a chance to do better.

I believe that God calls us all to life abundant. To full, meaningful, connected lives. To spiritual depth and work that matters and relationships that give life. Elijah went from that broom tree to the Mount of Horeb where he deepened his relationship with God, and then on to meet his protege Elisha and started to pass on his labor to the next generation. It wasn't God's intention that Elijah struggle alone, or burn himself out. It isn't God's will that we struggle alone nor burn ourselves out either. God wishes for full, abundant lives for us all. That's part of why we take care of each other, and share love in the world. So, dear ones, I encourage you to complete your stress cycles, name your emotions, connect with your dear ones, engage in prayer, and live life as abundantly as you can. God wants it for us, we want it for each other, and the world needs us as healthy as we can be! May God help us. Amen

1 https://www.statnews.com/2021/08/02/belated-realization-that-covid-will-be-a-long-war-sparks-anger-denial/

2 Emily Nagoski and Amelia Nagoski Burnout: The Secret to Unlokcing the Stress Cycle (New York: Ballantine Books, 2019) p. 14.

3 Nagoski, 15.

[alexsfictionaddiction]

Review: Conversations On Love by Natasha Lunn

This has been a highly anticipated read for a lot of my fellow bloggers and I was delighted to be accepted for it. With such a general title, I didn’t really know what to expect but I knew it would make me think and perhaps even teach me something about the broad spectrum of what love is.

Part memoir, part series of interviews, Conversations On Love is Natasha Lunn’s deep dive into love in all its beautiful, messy forms. Input comes from Candice Carty-Williams, Greg Wise, Philippa Perry, Lisa Taddeo, Dolly Alderton, Roxane Gay, Juno Dawson, Alain de Botton, Diana Evans and more. 

The book’s introduction explores Natasha Lunn’s own obsession with constantly longing for something more from her life. It really sets the tone for the whole book as it’s suggested that this longing for what we don’t have is perhaps responsible for all of our dissatisfaction. It is the cause of why we sometimes abandon what we have in search of something else or why we are simply never completely happy.

It also explores where our insatiable desire for romantic love comes from. The innate fear and prejudice that comes with being single is something that many people, particularly women, are desperate to avoid. Of course, this can often lead to unhealthy relationships and intense unhappiness all in the name of not being alone or ‘without love’. The following interviews all talk about the many other forms of love and endeavour to show both Natasha and the reader that not having a romantic relationship does not make you either alone or loveless.

Several sections of the book, particularly Candice Carty-Williams’ interview on the wonders of female friendship and Dolly Alderton’s comments on how friendships change over time, made me really consider why platonic love is considered less significant than romance. If you’re lucky enough to have a set of friends who have seen you through some life-changing or formative years, there is no doubt that this is an incredibly special form of love. The book does a lot to demonstrate how all other types of love can lead to a deeper happiness than the wrong romance ever could.

There are some poignant passages and really beautiful words of wisdom all over the book. These are lessons that we all need to learn and draw from when our relationships and lives get hard. Anyone thinking of ending a relationship should certainly read these parts and think about what how it applies to their own situation. I have no doubt it will give those readers the strength and confidence to make the right decision.

The conversation with Emily Nagoski, a writer and expert on sex and sexuality, made this striking but highly accurate comparison between wanting spontaneity in a sexual relationship to the demands of capitalism. It’s true that capitalism runs on selling satisfaction, which of course requires people to be permanently dissatisfied. Is it possible that this society-produced habit runs over into all aspects of our lives? It’s a fascinating connection and to me, it makes perfect sense!

Author Diana Evans talks about the love she has for her children and how that changes as they grow up. She also talks about how our relationship with her husband inevitably changed when the children arrived. Of course, it’s no secret that the introduction of children into a relationship makes for monumental change but Diana explains that it’s a beautiful one. Seeing your partner as a parent throws a new, gorgeous glow on them and although, your shared life is different, you can fall even deeper in love.

Poorna Bell’s interview focuses on the importance of her relationship with her sister. Poorna’s sister has been her confidante through the most horrific life events and her interview really caused me to think about the power of sibling love. The above quote really resonated with me and of course, I couldn’t help but think of my own relationship with my brother. We have always had a unique bond and I know that there may come a time where he is the only one left who has known my entire life.

There are also many sections that mention how important it is to know who you really are and what you really want before entering into a significant romantic relationship. Losing your sense of self is common when entering a new relationship because you’re trying to be a certain version of what you think your new partner wants. True self-awareness is something that I only achieved through months of therapy but I know it has made me much clearer on what I want from my relationships. The truth is that a shiny, new relationship will never be the answer to deep-rooted self-esteem problems and it takes a lot of people years to realise this, if they ever do.

I loved the philosophical parts of the book too. Some of the people that Natasha interviews go off on little tangents where they talk about how strange and complex humans are. The above thought from poet Lemn Sissay is one that I’ve had myself many times. The fact that everyone in the world has their own thoughts, dreams, fears and problems that we will likely never know about it and yet we’re all united in so many of these very same things is fascinating. 

The final part of the book talks a lot about the concept of loss and what grief really is. When you love someone, the idea of losing them is always terrifying but it’s something that we will all have to endure multiple times throughout our lives. The conversations with actor Greg Wise, who cared for his sister Clare in her final months of a battle with cancer and with Lucy Kalanithi, the widow of When Breath Becomes Air author Paul, are heartbreaking but they’re also full of hope. In these interviews, I could see that their loved ones were very much still with them in everything that they did and that’s an extremely comforting, beautiful idea.

Conversations On Love is about the importance of making and maintaining connections of all kinds. We will never get all of our needs met by one person and we need to be willing to meet some of those needs ourselves. Friends, family, colleagues, work, passions and faith are all valid sources of love that will evolve over time and because of this, we need to be willing to work at our relationships. Natasha Lunn is a fantastic interviewer and this is a wonderful collection of deeply personal stories, sage advice and stunning writing that will make you think and take your breath away on the same page.

[aewriting]

Rules: tag ten people you’d like to get to know better!!

tagged by the lovely and talented @lambourngb

Relationship Status: Married.  Married to a guy I first got together with at the end of senior year in our small town (it was a secret hookup because my family was so ridiculously religious), followed by almost five years of on/off stuff, followed by a seven-year long-distance relationship, and now we’ve been married for eight years.  Ask me why I like Malex, ha?

Favorite Color: Cobalt blue, coral

Lipstick or Chapstick: Even when I am actually leaving my house, my absolute favorite lip product is “je ne sais quoi” in “Your Perfect Pink” by “it cosmetics.”  It goes on clear and feels really nice, and it works with your natural lip pigmentation to give you just a little bit of enhanced color.  I love it.

Favorite Food: Fresh pasta with fresh made pesto, mushrooms, maybe some beautiful seafood in there (shrimp or scallops or something) with a generous sprinkling of locatelli romano cheese on top and fresh basil and fresh bread on the side. And some really good chocolate for dessert.  I am pretty low-key about most things, but I’m picky when it comes to tea, olive oil, chocolate, and cheese, ha.  

Last Song I Listened to: Lizzo “Good as Hell.” 

Last Movie I Watched: Movie intended for adults?  Old Guard, ha. Most recent movie, period?  Moana.

Top 3 Favorite TV Shows: Oh geez, this is tough for me. I don’t watch much TV. Roswell NM.  Let’s just leave it at that given the space it occupies in my mind, though @lambourngb recently reminded me I need to finish Justified, ha.

Top 3 Favorite Bands/Artists: Carly Simon, Angele Dubeau, Beatles

Book I’m reading: Unsurprisingly, I always have like eight books going at once, ha (similar to my WIPs, honestly - I like beginnings!): The Righteous Mind: Why Good People are Divided by Politics and Religion by Jonathan Haidt, The Art of Power by Thich Nhat Hanh.

And (I love this one) Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle by Emily Nagoski and her sister, Amelia Nagoski. Emily Nagoski’s “Come As You Are” is the best book on sex I’ve ever read, and I am loving her book on stress, too. Recommended to everyone, especially during these strange times.

Tagging @ninswhimsy, @andrea-lyn, @foramomentonly, @sabrinachill, @saadiestuff, @haloud, @myrmidryad, @ober-affen-geil, @tasyfa, @vague-shadows

[mysymmetry]

2020 Reading List Updated March 26 May 5 May 16 May 23 June 9 July 22 October 2 Nov 20 Dec 30 - 25 books this year, a gazillion in process

The Wrong Way to Save Your Life, Megan Stielstra

Race, Tony Morrison

Before I Was a Critic I Was a Human Being, Amy Fung

The Carrying, Ada Limon

Calling a Wolf a Wolf, Kaveh Ackbar

Find Me, Andre Aciman

Let’s No One Get Hurt, Jon Pineda

Motherhood, Sheila Heti

Dept. of Speculation, Jenny Offill

The Best American Essays 2018, ed. Hilton Als

In the Dream House, Carmen Maria Machado

Eat Pray Love, Elizabeth Gilbert

Stamped: Racism, Anti-racism and You, Jason Reynolds, Ibram X. Kendi

24/6: The Power of Unplugging One Day a Week, Tiffany Schlain

A House in the Sky, Amanda Lindhout and Sara Corbett

Three Women, Lisa Tadeo

Untamed, Glennon Doyle

Slouching Towards Bethlehem, Joan Didion

The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali, Chip Hartranft

The Fixed Stars, Molly Wizenberg

The Best American Essays 2019, ed. Rebecca Solnit

Lunar Abundance, Dr. Ezzie Spencer

Lovers and Writers, Lily King

Burnout, Amelia and Emily Nagoski

Dirty Work, Anna Maxymiw

Currently Reading:

Happy Hour, Marlowe Granados

Misconduct of the Heart, Cordelia Strube

Best American Essays 2020, ed. Andre Aciman

all about love, bell hooks

How to Do Nothing, Jenny Oddell

Braiding Sweetgrass, Robin Wall Kimmerer

White Fragility, Robin DiAngelo

On Earth We Are Briefly Gorgeous, Ocean Vuong

How to Carry Water, Lucille Clifton

Want to Read:

Pew, Catherine Lacey

The Power of Breathwork, Jennifer Patterson

The Gifts of Imperfection, Brene Brown (library)

Wine Girl,

Indelicacy, Amina Cain (library)

The Factory, Hiroko Oyamada

We Have Always Been Here, Samra Habib (libary)

You Exist Too Much, Zaina Arafat

Sand Book, Ariana Reines

Make it Burn, Make it Scream, Leslie Jamison

Night Sky with Exit Wound, Ocean Vuong

Morals and Maxims, de la Rochefoucauld

Don’t Call Us Dead, Danez Smith

Sophie Calle, The Address Book

Sacred Contracts, Caroline Myss

Policing Black Lives, (Canada) Robyn Maynard

Q The Letters, ed. Sarah Moon (queer writers on their younger selves)

Bone Map, Sara Eliza Johnson (poems)

Fantasia or the Man in Black, Tommye Blount (gabrielle bates)

The Thing That Brought the Shadow Here, Alison Stagner (gbates)

Pricks in the Tapestry, Jameson Fitzpatrick (gbates and ayden)

Sister Outsider, Audre Lorde (allymaz)

Skill in Action, Michelle Casandra Johnson (radicalizing yoga to create a just world)

A Girl’s Story, Annie Ernaux (catherine lacey) (avail at library)

All is Forgotten, Nothing is Lost, Lan Samantha Chang (ayden)

The Archive of Alternate Endings, Lindsey Drager (ayden+++)

Fantasy, Kim-Anh Schrieber

A Little Life, Hanya Hanigahara

Yoga Where You Are, Dianne Bondy & 

The Practice is the Path, Tias Little

Yoga of the Subtle Body, Tias Little

Your Body, Your Yoga, Bernie Clark

Christmas List 2020:

Aligator and Other Stories, Dima Alzayat

A History of My Brief Body,

The Lightness, Emily Temple

Brown Album, Porochista Kahkpour

Lady Romeo, Tana Wojczuk

Started but Haven’t Finished:

Small Game Hunting, Megan Gail Coles

Everything Under, Daisy Johnson

The Mother of All Questions, Rebecca Solnit

I Become a Delight to My Enemies, Sara Peters

Why Did I Ever, Mary Robison

[cliponearringsandtea]

Thoughts for the new school year from a college senior

Set Systems, not goals*

Instead of setting lofty goals for your semester, try coming up with systems that will help you be productive on a daily basis (or you know, more often). Rowena Tsai has a wonderful youtube video about this concept here, and she explains how to create systems here.

*Rowena Tsai 2020

Make a fun playlist to dance to! Or use this one! I recently learned about the stress cycle from Emily and Amelia Nagoski's excellent book Burnout:The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle (you can find their podcasts here! and the book here!).

In the book they talk about how stress and stressors are two different things. A stressor is something that causes your body to go into the biological state of stress. A stressor can be anything from a scary tiger ready to pounce to an annoying email from your professor.

Because the stress response (fight, flight, freeze) developed under conditions where your life is in mortal danger the body often doesn't get the signal that you've dealt with the stressor when the stressor isn't something you can run from or fight. So the Nagoski sisters emphasize that movement can be a helpful way to balance stress on a daily basis!

Personally, before working on a something that is stressing me out I like to listen to Lover or this playlist that I made and dance around my room so I can get to work without the stress.

Find a planning system that works for you! I have tried out a lot of planning systems over time, and none of them have necessarily worked long term for me, but that's okay. I think it's helpful to think about what has worked well and not well for you in the past.

For instance, I hate dated planners because then I feel guilty wasting paper when I happen not to use that week's spread. I also need to be able to easily move tasks around my week, yet be able to also brain dump a bunch tasks at once.

Currently I'm using monday.com which is free for college students and I've been finding it a great tool this summer to keep myself organized. I also use google calendar to keep track of all of my appointments etc.

If you are taking online classes create a context for them If you, like me, already found it hard to focus in in-person classes, you probably have noticed that focusing in online classes is about 50% harder. These are some things I am going to try out/have tried to to help me focus more in these classes.

1. Find a space that is for class: last semester I spent all of my time at my desk (which is right next to my bed ugh) and that wasn't as helpful as I wished it to be since in college I go to different classrooms and lecture halls. These spaces set the tone and make it easier to concentrate in my experience. So for classes this semester I'm planning to work in my family's dining room. That's not something that's available to everyone, so some ideas include sitting in a particular orientation on your bed only during class time or having something that you put on your desk during class time to remind of the context.

2. Wearing clothing that I would wear to class (bonus if it makes me feel good about myself). PJs are comfy, but wearing them to class bleeds the boundary between relaxation and work which is just not so helpful in the long run.

3. Closing all of my tabs and having only the ones necessary to the class open. Bonus if I get my notebook out and ready before lecture starts!

4. Putting zoom in full screen and writing in a notebook instead of on my computer.

5. Finding something distracting to do with my hands that is not on the computer. Embroidery is 100% better for my concentration than Teen Vogue's newest lip balm recs.

6. Having a not distracting computer background, and using the Mission control setting on my MacBook.

Find time to eat!

It's really easy to forget to eat when you are super busy, but eating is really important! Eating gives you the energy you need to pay attention and do well in school and just generally live a happy healthy life.

Figure out when in your day you can set aside time to eat (hopefully without rushing), what classes you can snack in, and when you get hungry. If it's not triggering to you, you can pay attention to how certain foods make you feel and which ones give you the best energy for your day.

Also food is amazing and delicious and makes my day better. Meals are a great time to see other members of your household or get off your phone! I really treasure my daily pre-class breakfast with just me and the newspaper.

I'm not a dietician or a nutritionist so take my advice with a grain of salt. Abbey Sharpe's Youtube channel is a great place to learn about nutrition from a dietician.

Get Good Sleep!!!!!!!!!!

This has been one of the most important things for me in my academic life, and when I've fallen off the getting good sleep track I have definitley regretted it.

Set yourself a bedtime and a wakeup time and try to be consistent. Even if you get the same hours of sleep a night but you go to bed at 10pm one night and 1pm the other night, your body will not necessarily be so happy, because this messes with your internal clock.

Snoozing often makes me more groggy, so getting up with my first alarm gives me more energy. Being tired from a lack of sleep can turn into a vicious cycle for me, I end up staying up later when I'm tired because I can't find the energy to move towards bed, and then I'm tired again the next day. To that end, I'm working on developing a bed time routine so that going to bed is more automatic for me.

[anxiousamoeba]

On the Feminist Survival Project:2020

I just finished listening to the last episode of FSP: 2020. Going in I was already feeling a sense of loss and grief, feeling abandoned by these two sisters who have somehow in my heart become like hilarious aunts that simultaneously yell “fuck that guy” and pour you a shot and fill up your cup with water and tuck me in at night with bedtime songs about the continuous cycle of our rage. I went in feeling alone and dreading what my life will be without their weekly episodes, even though I haven’t listened weekly. Even though I’ve already relistened to episodes and skipped a month and then binged my way through five hours of a month of Amelia’s recovery from covid. I went in not wanting to let go, but by the end all I feel is grateful and connected.

Whatever they do next I’m not abandoned. I have their archived work on Spotify and I have their lessons in my heart and my feet and my stomach. I can revisit them as I continue through the cycle of my life and emotions. And I know that as I’m listening to How to Rage someone else is listening to The Abyss and we are walking together along our own craggy cliffs somehow side by side.

And I know that no matter what I reached a goal that they set out for me because we still might not know who the president is, but I survived the 2020 election. I reached a finish line in the marathon of my life that I didn’t remember was there. I have survived 2020 and all of its relentless shit. And I’m so glad. I’m so grateful. And I don’t know how I would have done it without them. I probably would have, but I know I wouldn’t be sitting here crying in relief that I’m alive and that that matters to other people. I wouldn’t feel a sense of victory to be in this moment and in my body.

So thank you to Emily and Amilia Nagoski for doing this podcast and giving me a goal and the means to reach it. Thank you @whothehoney for telling me to listen and sharing this space that is so important to you with me. Thank you to my people who care for me as I care for them. Thank you FSP: 2020 for encouraging me to a state of action and to heal my shit.

[purplefrayedisaster]

THEN

Saw her loving mother banging Krampus (more than once mind you). It scared/scarred her for a good portion of her childhood. And she used to love xmas.

Had her sexual awakening around 15, aka discovered she preferred girls over the boys. Though she is definitely bisexual. also might or might not have had a harem type thing going on.

Did some stupid shit in her youth (when I figure all that out I’ll let you know)

Loved watching horror films growing up. Due to seeing her mom banging Krampus she has become desensitized to a lot of things, like horror films

Very big into the occult. Would read up on all the things.

Loves her siblings, she is pretty much there for them all. Hell she would even let them crawl into bed with her when they had nightmares

Basically kind of become a mom to her siblings, sometimes she’ll mother hen them in a joking manor. She is protective of them even when she is kind of joking around.

Tried to balance being a kind of mother figure and older sister to her younger siblings.

carried a damn first aid kit  because her siblings have been known to be magnets for trouble or hurting themselves. 

had a brief psychotics break down after Dani die.

Greg

she loves Greg and is there for him too. And yeah she even mothered him too.

Tim

knows who his real father is and never really told him

feel feels guilty that she didn’t make the time to tell him the truth, and for not being able to realize how depressed her baby bother is.

if Tim ever needed help she’d be there to help him, which would include a trip to Germany to find his father

kat might have hooked up with one of his exes 

had to teach him about sex... still probably needs to check up on his knowledge about sex and health stuff. she really should just give him a quiz every month. 

Dani

is closer to Dani, cause she was pretty much Kat’s mini-me

Her heart was shattered when Dani was possessed by a demon and couldn’t be saved. Blames her sister's death on their parents. rarely speaks with them

Feels guilty that she couldn’t save Dani, nor did she realize what was happening .

she spoiled Dani and still does

also had the sex talk with her, and gave her a book titled “Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life“ by Emily Nagoski. She also doesn’t have to worry about Dani not being safe. 

POWERS

Is super skilled with tarot cards, different types of deviation,

Thinks she is could be pretty powerful but not as powerful as other older witches

Is trying to write her own grimoire

Is kind of scared of exorcisms or preforming them

makes her siblings protection charms, she even made some for their parents. also might make them for those that are able to get truly close to her 

is willing to teach others the craft

NOW

also her dead sister showed up at her door like a few years ago. it was great.

She is kind of a nudist, so be careful when visiting her. only really wears clothing when dani and a guest will be at her house

Likes to role-play/play doctor

Kind of wants kids but doesn’t wanna fuck them up as her parents did to her and her sibs

Researches demonology in her free time, when she isn’t flirting with the ladies (Timmy likes)

Her co-workers and some friends think she is nymphomania or has hypersexuality, just because she has more game than them.

knows what she wants and how to get it

if she ever were to have a break down she’d try to hide it by crying in the shower

she is shocked that she doesn’t have any gray hairs 

I’ll add more when I think of stuff. 

[ruthlangdon]

(Download PDF/Epub) Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle - Emily Nagoski

Download Or Read PDF Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle - Emily Nagoski Free Full Pages Online With Audiobook.

  [*] Download PDF Here => Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle

[*] Read PDF Here => Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle

 This groundbreaking book explains why women experience burnout differently than men?and provides a simple, science-based plan to help women minimize stress, manage emotions, and live a more joyful life.Burnout. Many women in America have experienced it. What?s expected of women and what it?s really like to be a woman in today?s world are two very different things?and women exhaust themselves trying to close the gap between them. How can you ?love your body? when every magazine cover has ten diet tips for becoming ?your best self?? How do you ?lean in? at work when you?re already operating at 110 percent and aren?t recognized for it? How can you live happily and healthily in a sexist world that is constantly telling you you?re too fat, too needy, too noisy, and too selfish?Sisters Emily Nagoski, PhD, and Amelia Nagoski, DMA, are here to help end the cycle of feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. Instead of asking us to ignore the very real obstacles and societal pressures that stand

[lqb2reads]

the truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off. — gloria steinem, ht burnout by the nagoski sisters