#OMFG when do female characters catch a break?

[teafiend]

GIFs credited to: @Nungchae (Twitter/X)

Tangent: While watching “Money Game”, I found that I enjoyed the minimal/naturalistic makeup for Lee Hye Joon too (Shim Eun Kyung) too. Very nice and just lovely.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 296: Ngl, This One Pissed Me Off

Previously on BnHA: Deku was all, “p.s. I actually activated yet another quirk several chapters ago when Kacchan got stabbed.” Compress was all, “[gets captured and passes out].” Spinner was all “[rifles through Tomura’s pockets and slaps a random Charbroiled Hand onto his friend’s unconscious face].” Tomura was all, “SOMEHOW THAT ACTUALLY WORKED” and woke up again, except it wasn’t really him, it was everyone’s favorite Final Villain, AFO. AFO was all, “time to escape finally” and summoned a bunch of Noumu and Absconded with Spinner and the DabiMarble in tow. Skeptic was all, “Horikoshi forgot I existed, but I’m actually Absconding in marble-form as well.” Deku was all, “ATTENTION WORLD, I WOULD LIKE TO ANNOUNCE THAT I OFFICIALLY WANT TO SAVE SHIGARAKI TOMURA.” And then the arc just sort of ended lol.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all, “but when you think about it, do we really need literally any female teachers at U.A. at all?” and for whatever reason doesn’t stop to wait for an answer. Midnight, who absolutely did not need to die, Dies, and I’m pissed about it. Ochako wanders the ruins of Jakku for what feels like hours, rescuing small children while her adult hero compatriots fall to pieces around her, because apparently the U.A. kids really are the only people who have their shit together. The citizens of Japan are all “damn that’s wild, wonder how fucked we are now,” but are actually super casual and chill about it which is oddly realistic. The chapter ends with AFO in Tartarus being all “lol time for the prison break arc,” without giving us so much as a chance to catch our breath, like holy shit. Are we on the clock or something now, goddamn.

lmao it’s like 7pm on a Sunday night and this is out already. this is like the worst possible timing lol. there goes my nice, relaxed evening. unless of course this turns out to be a nice, restful, soothing chapter, as chapters coming on the heels of traumatic, earth-shattering battles so often are. yeah, break out the Pina Colada song and the little drink umbrellas, I got a good feeling about this one

(ETA: I mean, I was obviously being sarcastic here but damn, Horikoshi.)

-- fff why did I laugh

it’s the crumbling city ruins in the background that really does it, I think. JUST LOOK AT THIS MESS THAT YOU HAVE MADE, EVERYONE. FOR SHAME

also, the title is dramatic af and I am so fucking excited you guys, like holy shit. BnHA’s In-Between arcs have always been my favorite part of the series, because it’s when all the character development and angst and/or catharsis happens. just, those little breathing spaces in between the action when everyone gathers to recuperate and compartmentalize their fresh new traumas lmao. bring on that angst!! but also, let’s please have some Comfort to offset all of this Hurt too, please and thanks

blah blah blah so the survivors were evacuated, good good, can you actually show us though?

AHHHHHHH

PIXIE BOB SURVIVED!!!! WASH IS STILL ALIVE LMAO HOW. THIRTEEN’S FACE, OMG SHOULD I LOOK AWAY. IS IT LIKE MANDALORIAN RULES. IDK HOW IT WORKS

HOW THE FUCK ARE THEY ALIVE. LOLS ANYWAY I’M HERE FOR IT. FEEL FREE NOT TO KILL ANYONE ELSE HERE HORIKOSHI, I THINK WE’RE GOOD

(ETA: it’s like talking to a brick wall.)

oh my god do we really need exposition about how the heroes tried to stop TomurAFO from escaping and OF COURSE failed completely because they suck lmao. oh my god I am shocked, that is such shocking news

wow they only managed to defeat three of the Noumus. holy shit. again, all of the Not-Kid Heroes are only slightly more useful than cardboard cutouts of heroes at this point, MORE AT ELEVEN

so Tomura may have lost the PLF, but he still more or less has an army then, huh. I really don’t know how anyone could expect a timeskip with that threat looming over everyone’s heads

oh nvm lol there are only seven Noumus left. wait so you’re telling me there were only ten Nearly High Ends in that last chapter?? felt more like fifty but whatever lol I’ll take your word for it

COMPRESS YAY YOU’RE ALIVE TOO

MAYBE THEY CAN EVEN REATTACH HIS ASS. I’M SERIOUS LOL, BECAUSE HE STILL HAS IT, DOESN’T HE? OR IF NOT, THEY CAN REBUILD HIM WITH A PROSTHETIC ASS. he’ll be more powerful than ever

WHAAAAAAT YEAH BOIIIII

WOOO, EDGESHOT, WOOOOO. THAT’S HIS WAY OF THE NINJA

YEAHHHHH SUCK IT, PLF

(ETA: for the record I don’t think Cementoss is dead here, just badly wounded. if he had died he would have been included in the forthcoming In Memoriam page along with the others.)

GET BENT LOL. TRUMPET I FOR REAL FORGOT YOU EVEN EXISTED. I NEVER WANT TO SEE ANY OF YOU LOSERS AGAIN PLEASE. ONLY INTERESTING CHARACTERS MAY PROCEED PAST THIS POINT

dsflksaldkh;l

that’s... holy shit. that’s a bigass mansion, that’s what that is. also so does this mean there are still eighty thousand PLF members still at large, because that’s a plot line I very much do not care about in any way whatsoever lol. can’t we just retcon to say that Re-Destro was exaggerating? I mean hell, a CEO criminal pulling some Enron-type bullshit is pretty believable, isn’t it? those poor bamboozled shareholders

“makeste, here’s an idea, what if you scrolled down to read the rest of the page” lol gtfo of here with your logic and your sense

well those 132 people have made it onto my enemies list, but at least it sounds like they more or less took care of the rest. good riddance

and Toga escaped, as we knew already, and is now on the lam. hopefully she reunites with the League again at some point. although her doing her own thing could also be very interesting. idk what I want lol

anyway so there’s another big panel showing how fucked up the city is, just in case it hadn’t already been hammered into our skulls yet. there’s a car dangling off a roof somehow. how does that even happen. did Machia pick it up and put it there or

NOOO OMG RANDOM SMALL CHILDREN IN PERIL WHAT IS THIS

OCHAKO PLEASE SAVE THEM OMG

“if it falls on me, I want you to have my Endeavor pouch” OH MY STARS. HIS MOST PRECIOUS POSSESSION. NO MY CHILD YOU CAN’T GIVE UP HOPE YET

LMAO

“FOR THE LAST TIME NOBODY CARES ABOUT YOUR DUSTY-ASS POUCH, KYLE” fffff these children are dying and I am cracking up so hard my eyes are tearing up what is wrong with me

YAY THEY SAVED THEM

but listen. not that I don’t love seeing the girls kick ass, because you know I do. but I also really, REALLY need to know what’s going down with the Musketeers, and I’m not looking forward to waiting three whole weeks for that so please Horikoshi. please hurry this along so we can get to them

goddamn it Tsuyu is saying she’ll take the boy to the shelter to get first aid, and I was all “okay great because that’s probably where Kacchan and the others are too”, but now someone else is shouting for help and Ochako’s all “I’ll go” and it’s like OKAY BUT PLEASE? this chapter is already more than half over omfg. ‘bout to start wringing some hands here

oh my god

is this Toga again??? WHAT THE HELL, THIS CREEPYASS HALF-DEAD DUDE BETTER BE LEADING UP TO SOMETHING INTERESTING, I AM REALLY GETTING IMPATIENT

OR, I GUESS, WE COULD DO THIS INSTEAD

“SO AS IT TURNS OUT, NOT EVERY CHARACTER WHO NEEDS HELP SAVING THEIR SPOUSE FROM FALLEN RUBBLE IS ACTUALLY TOGA IN DISGUISE” HUH, OKAY. DULY NOTED. FILED AWAY FOR FUTURE REFERENCE

but fucking... okay, look. I love Ochako, I do. but I like her a whole lot more when she’s interacting with other characters I actually care about, as opposed to running around in the rubble rescuing random people while the fate of my other children is still up in the air. like okay, I get it, shit’s bad, now if you don’t mind we really don’t have to spend all day here though

...anyways but nope, we’re still staying with her. she’s bouncing around rescuing all of these other people. omg. I literally have no patience here at all and it’s terrible, I know, but oh my god

omg finally something interesting is happening!!

look at that, an adult hero standing around being useless while the kids are busy getting shit done. why is this becoming a recurring theme

MY DUDE, THIS IS SERIOUSLY NOT THE TIME THOUGH

I GET THAT IT’S OVERWHELMING AND THAT YOU’RE TRAUMATIZED AND SHIT, BUT GUESS WHAT, SO IS EVERYONE ELSE. THAT’S WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR. JUST LOOK AT OCHAKO! SHE’S SO EXHAUSTED HER HAIR HAS EVEN LOST ITS FLOOF, AND YET SHE’S STILL OUT HERE DOING HER BEST. ONE SAVE AT A TIME MY MAN. GET IT DONE. LITERALLY A SMALL CHILD IN THE BOTTOM RIGHT CALLING FOR THEIR MOMMY AND YOU’RE JUST STANDING THERE ALL “WAHH IT’S TOO MUCH” LIKE COULD YOU PLEASE POSTPONE YOUR CRISIS UNTIL AFTER YOU SAVE THEM PLEASE

OH MY GOD

MAYBE YOU SHOULD!! oh my god I really cannot, like wow. oh no I actually have to save people and do my job, god forbid. jesus christ, at least the other heroes tried. but Moping Hero: Bellyache here is just throwing in the towel and fuck everyone who still needs his help I guess. you are like the anti-Deku my dude

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD NO OH FUCK

THAT’S MIDNIGHT’S HAND OH FU -- SHE BETTER NOT -- HORIKOSHI I SWEAR TO GOD --

I’M GONNA LOSE IT I REALLY AM!!!!

HOLY SHIT HOW INTENSE OF A RAGE DO I NEED TO BRACE MYSELF TO BE FEELING HERE. THIS CHAPTER WAS ALREADY TRENDING TOWARDS DISAPPOINTMENT, DO WE REALLY NEED TO GO AND COMPOUND THAT

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON

you’re telling me Tomura wasn’t brought back by that electric shock, but by his “fuck you” attitude? why are you explaining this to us now, again??

......

HEY, SO UM, FUCK ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS, THOUGH. (: OH MAN. OHHHHHH MAN. I HAVE... I HAVE GOT A LOT OF WORDS FOR THIS AND HERE ARE SOME OF THEM

FUCK

THINGS THAT SHOULD BE IN THE DICTIONARY NEXT TO “SOME BULLSHIT”: THIS

FUCK

GET FUCKED HORIKOSHI

AND ALSO PLEASE FUCK RIGHT OFF!!

AND SERIOUSLY THOUGH FUCK YOU

NO BUT YOU KNOW WHAT THOUGH!! YOU COULD HAVE KILLED OFF ANYONE. LITERALLY ANY CHARACTER. YOU HAD TWELVE FEMALE PROS. TWELVE. YOU COULD HAVE MADE MORE OF THEM. PROBABLY, IF THERE ACTUALLY WERE SUPERHEROES IN REAL LIFE, THERE WOULD BE MORE THAN TWELVE OF THEM IN AN ENTIRE NATION. BUT NO, YOU WERE ALL “TWELVE IS MORE THAN ENOUGH.” AND THEN WHEN IT CAME TIME TO KILL PEOPLE OFF, YOU WERE ALL “WELL ALL RIGHT THEN, LET’S SEE, I PICK... THESE 18 RANDOM SIDE CHARACTERS WITH LITTLE TO NO DIALOGUE, PLUS THE ONE SINGLE FEMALE U.A. STAFF MEMBER WE ACTUALLY HAD. YEAH THAT OUGHTA DO IT”

AND BY THE WAY, HORIKOSHI, I PICKED SOMETHING UP FOR YOU ON MY WAY HOME, HERE IT IS, ┌П┐(・＿・) do you like it it was on sale. I saw it and was like, “Horikoshi would really like that.” so there you go. sorry it wasn’t gift-wrapped

p.s. I hope y’all can tell that that’s supposed to be a middle finger and not... something else lmao. er. anyway

(ETA: so I got a few asks from people who were really put off by this part of the reaction post, and so I’m just adding an extra note here to make it clear that I do not actually wish harm on Horikoshi in any way or even particularly dislike him. I wasn’t happy about Midnight’s death and I wanted to convey that, and so I went with my usual LOUD CAPSLOCK REACTION tone, but looking back on it I can see that it’s kind of a lot, lol. 

so just to be clear, the “fuck you” stuff is almost entirely tongue-in-cheek. that’s on me, I forget sometimes that there are people who share these sentiments unironically and so I didn’t think to make sure my intended meaning here was clear. anyways, killing Midnight was still a really problematic decision for numerous reasons but it is what it is. Horikoshi is not perfect, the story isn’t perfect, and I’m not gonna pretend like it is, but again just to be clear, I don’t harbor any actual ill will toward Horikoshi here.)

shit. and wow this man really went and killed off fucking Mystic too on top of that. have you ever seen a character fail so spectacularly at living up to their hype. r.i.p. Mystic you were like the Star Wars sequel of characters

(ETA: I have no fucking idea why I keep thinking Majestic’s name is Mystic lol. rest in peace you old scarecrowy bastard.)

and poor Momo, though. fuck. lost two mentors in a single day. and do not even get me started on Aizawa holy shit

so now we’re cutting to some random townspeople who are gossiping about the Todoroki drama. this is actually interesting in spite of my newfound determination to hate this chapter lol

ngl I am kind of heartened to see that not everyone fell for Dabi’s bs hook line and sinker though. Jeanist returning from the dead literally two seconds after Dabi was all “I SWEAR ON MY HONOR AS A VILLAIN THAT HAWKS MURDERED HIM” probably helped with that a bit! but there will doubtless be many other people who do believe him, or are at least still inclined to side-eye the heroes in general either way given how much they sucked in this arc. very, very interesting

so it seems though that even more than the whole Endeavor reveal, at the end of the day it’s going to be the heroes failing to live up to their end of the “put your faith in us and let us use our quirks and in return we’ll protect everyone and keep them safe” implied social contract that’s going to have the biggest impact on people’s opinions moving forward. basically this was always going to be a disaster no matter what

OH MY GOD FINALLY AHHHHH

Horikoshi really tapped into some of the real-life political energy of the past few years huh. Fuck Him Still for killing off Midnight, but I will admit that so far this is hella intriguing and I am really, really curious to see where things go from here

OH MY GOD THE LITTLE KIDS FROM THE BABYSITTING ARC

“FIVE PEEPEE MAN WOULDN’T LIE TO US” YES CHILDREN YOU’RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. at least the little ones still have faith

UM

 ( •̀ へ •́  )

that’s great. that’s really keen. all we need right now, amirite

GOOD FOR YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT

let’s just wait for him to explain what he feels. you know he likes to drag it out

is that Dabi crouched down there next to Spinner? looks like they got him out of the marble after all. but why has his hair changed colors again lol what

anyways. your turn to what??

:’) excuse me what

hahahaha are you fucking kidding me. and that’s where we’re going to end the chapter then. lol okay

so let’s recap. Midnight died. we spent ten hours watching Ochako dig people out of rubble for no apparent reason and were then introduced to my new least favorite character, and because Ochako is so nice she didn’t even punch him in the face even though she really should have. we did not get any Kacchan or Shouto. we got one panel of Deku, who is Finally Asleep. and the chapter ended with AFO ordering his Noumus to go set free, AND I QUOTE, HIS “MAIN BODY.” and now I gotta wait an entire week for Caleb’s translation to confirm that last part. omg

but it sounds like a prison break is imminent, which is very, very interesting. ...and actually, is it weird that I’m actually rooting for it to be a success? I have no idea what this guy is planning, but I do know that as long as the main part of his soul is still residing in Tomura’s body, Tomura’s chance of surviving the series is close to zero. and villain though he may be, I’m still rooting for his redemption (nice to have Deku on my side now too), and so yeah. so like if AFO feels like using some latent Exorcism Quirk or something that he’s been saving for just such an occasion, be my guest lol

meanwhile this doesn’t bode well for All Might though. or anyone else aside from Tomura, really. shiiiit

anyway. [slaps roof of chapter] this baby can fit so much bullshit in it

[torivikachu]

WARNING UNREASONABLE SHITPOST

recently, I see so much hate everywhere. magnetic storms or what but fandoms are getting rlly nasty when clashing with each other.

I think it is important to understand, that we shouldn't be bashing others, whatever we or they might like, as long as it is not offensive or reasonably immoral - and I stress, REASONABLY! some people believe homosexuality is immoral and that is just /warning! offensive language/ dumb.

as a huge fan of SNS I see a lot of anti's this days - antisakura, antiending, antinarusasu, antisasunaru, antinaruhina, antisasusaku, antiboruto and whatever. and - ugh - as much as I myself hate to admit that.... expectant drums sound.... nobody cares!

I mean - it's Kishimotos work. it's his idea, it's his story, it's his vision and - sadly - we don't get to decide whether he was wrong or not.

whether he should have ended the story with SNS,

whether he should have made female characters more prominent,

whether he should have killed Sakura off,

whether he should have made Naruto a better father,

whether he should have done many other things we all want him to do,

because - no matter how much we love the story or the characters - we are not the ones who created them, not the ones who understand them the most.

I mean, I have written myself a couple of paragraphs on how much I hate what is going on in Boruto - so yeah hi hypocrite! - but I sincerely mean well. yeah it pains me a bit to watch Boruto cuz of nostalgia I feel for Naruto series but I keep on watching, because I can't cut out that part of my heart that is responsible to crave more of Naruto universe even if I hate it.

and I am probably going to keep criticizing every damn thing - like, have you heard the Kara soundtrack? omfg I facepalmed the whole episode after that - and I wish it was better, but I am not going to bash characters for being created that way.

bc you know what? people are shitty. good people are shitty. bad people are shitty. everybody is shitty. so I guess made up characters get to be shitty too.

I mean, bashing Sakura for not having same problems as Naruto and Sasuke and thus not always getting them? - duh! remember yourself at 12, 13, 14, 15, you were a fucking whiner and you know it. and what were your problems? not getting a laptop you wanted? being punished for bad grades? getting into the fight with your parents for being unreasonable?

yeah, like you never said stuff like I wish I didn't have parents. I remember a moment after the fight I wrote a note to my parents before going to sleep that literally said ' sorry you got such a bad daughter I wish you didnt have to deal with me' and then went to sleep. in the morning - having completely forgotten it - I was woken up by my crying mom who said it was the stupidest thing on earth I knew I hurt her with it. and I regret it. it was dumb and shitty and I normaly consider myself a good person, but that was a huge shit I pulled. and I can't take it back. but I was like 10 and I didn't know better at the time.

why would I hold Sakura to higher standards then I hold myself?

then people bash her for being mean to Naruto - well, duh again - KIDS ARE MEAN. she got older and managed to see Naruto for who he was, but people still see her as a bully.

well, if we are not ready to accept peoples mistakes if they have managed to live up to them, I dont want to be a part of that 'we'

next I see a lot of bashing for Sakura being a bad mom - ugh, duh again /what is it, third time?/! how come? yeah she works a lot, since she is a single mother and all, but she genuinly cares for Sarada, even if she gets a bit overprotective at times. she doesn't have a very working relationship with Sasuke - well sure, he is never home!

then there's bashing Naruto and Sasuke for being bad fathers - you might think they'd learn to appreciate a family after being orphans.........

well where do I start. Sasuke is clinically afraid of losing loved ones after he has lost so much, so he is much better off not having many bonds and it is obvious as day. it doesn't make what he does right or good or wrong, it's just who he is. Naruto... well, lets start with the fact that he never had a role model. he had Iruka - at times, he had Jiraya for three years, but he never really had a family. he was a good dad - as we can see - when kids were little and he wasnt a hokage...

but now... he might work too hard, he might overdo it a bit at times, but if you think that he struggled his whole life to get appreciation why would you think he'd stop now? he just wants to manage everything, but he cant, and it kills him but he doesnt stop and its beautiful. yeah, its unhealthy and stupid but beautiful, because that is what the core of his character is. thats what this world has shaped him to be.

BUT THEN AGAIN THAT IS JUST MY PERCEPTION. I am pretty fucking sure Kishimoto and authors had their own reasons for it that are justified and totally okay because these are his characters who he can do whatever he wants to.

just like we people can.

and I can go on, because there is just SO MUCH HATING AND BASHING I just can't take it anymore.

I mean this whole war of sasunaru and narusasu - why would you care who fucks whom as long as both enjoy it and dynamics in bed dont influence dynamics in the relationship.

I mean... fanfics are not real. hell, even Naruto is not real, but fanfics exist entirely separately from the anime (most of them don't even get personalities right) and it is OKAY. they can exist separately to please those who are unhappy with how things go.

but please please pleeease stop bashing everything just for the sake of it. and I don't mean you are not entitled to feel and I am not telling what you should feel but there is so much more wholesomeness and awesomeness and beauty in portraying and seeing Sakura as a supportive friend and Sasuke as a helpless child inside and Naruto as a strong person who just really can't catch a break. and Boruto and Sarada as a way to make SNS canon in some twisted way.

you know? positive thinking.

but Next generation still sorta sucks.

no offense, though

😆

[tfw-no-tennis]

animorphs!!!

ok I read animorphs when I was 10 or 11 I think? and I only read it once, along w/the spinoffs and stuff, and I've always meant to revisit it...SO HERE I AM....

and oh MAN I forgot how good this series is. like I knew it was good but some things from your childhood don't hold up yknow? especially books aimed at younger audiences

but oh boy does animorphs hold up. they're easy to read and perfectly balance the line between dark/adult topics and more kid-friendly lessons. excellent 

so yeah I'm loving it so far. I forgot how fast some stuff happens lmao, like I forgot that tobias gets trapped as a bird in the FIRST BOOK 

also I just adore how realistically disorganized/confused the animorphs are. like, they got the elevator pitch version of the conflict from elfangor before my mans got eaten, and also they're middle schoolers. of course they’re always just like ‘wtf do we even do’ 

so like...their plans mostly don't work. and even when planning they run into tons of logistical issues w/morphing, traveling, communicating etc. 

and I love how they clearly need to maintain their normal lives as well in order not to raise any suspicion 

and I like the little details like them not spending all their time together at school because they didn’t before so that would be suspicious

oh man and I love the different family dynamics in the series. you have jake, whose family seems pretty normal until we find out that tom is a controller, and rachel, whose parents are divorced, and who has to deal w/the complications of that. and then cassie, who is an only child (I like that we have a mix, with rachel and jake having siblings), and of course marco...

iirc marco was one of my favs (if not my fav, but its hard to choose) back in the day, and I forgot how reluctant he was to participate in the animorphs thing...and the fact that he was about to quit the team and then runs into visser 1.....

another fucked up little moment I liked - when they morphed dolphin and marco had to morph back to human bc he gets injured and he was like ‘I cant swim, and my mom drowned, I don't want to die like she did’ I was like oooof

also on that topic I adore how little the animorphs know about how anything works. like they once wondered if there's a limit to how many morphs they can acquire and they were basically like ‘idk guess we’ll find out’ 

and then when marco got injured as a dolphin and they were like ‘morph back I guess and hopefully you'll be okay?’ like damn luckily that worked 

basically these books do The Most Excellent Job showing that these are just kids. like they're literally in jr high which is 90s speak for middle school....they're like 13???? at most???

and the narrative reflects that perfectly!! all of them, even rachel who is pretty much the most gung-ho about fighting and stuff, have nightmares and all these terrible experiences bc they don't have basically any guidance 

and even with ax, it’s immediately obvious that he’s also just a kid, even though he’s this deadly alien....

also oh mannnn I love so much how we’re introduced to the andalites as this heroic race and how that slowly changes over the course of the story 

like, when elfangor introduces himself as ‘prince’ you assume he’s part of the andalite monarchy - but later we find out that ‘prince’ is a military rank, and the andalites are a lot more militaristic than we would assume at the beginning 

its so fantastic how it starts off as a fairly black and white conflict of andalites = good guy aliens and yeerks = bad guy aliens

and you even have some background stuff going on w/the taxxons being controllers by choice, and the hork-bajir being enslaved 

but as the story goes on, all of those lines get blurred in different ways...

also ooof the poor hork-bajir. I always felt so bad for them. it’s crazy that even in the first book, the animorphs are killing their enemies - at least I inferred that in book 1, but it becomes way more overt later on...the tough situation of them knowing that the hork-bajir are unwilling hosts but that they’re so dangerous that not killing them could be fatal to the good guys

and ngl this time around I have a lot more sympathy for the yeerks, even tho they don't really deserve it (at least in the early parts of the story where I am rn)

like...they're just these blind helpless slug creatures, but they're also fully sentient and intelligent? like, that's so fucked up. imagine yourself as you are now, but you're just a sensory deprived slug swimming in a pool. that's pretty fucked. and then the fact that the yeerks are biologically made to be parasites...its kinda no wonder that they ended up the way they are (and it also makes stuff like the yeerk peace movement really compelling)

also wow I kinda forgot about all the body horror w/the morphing. like ik that's one of the things that animorphs is known for but like. I forgot how much it happens and how creative the horrifying descriptions are. I love it

and omfg so when I first read this series the ellimist stuff confused me a lot bc I didn't read the books That closely (I mostly wanted to see what would happen next) but I loooove time travel bullshit so I’m really enjoying it so far

even tho tbh I think even if I had paid more attention as a 10 yr old I still would've been confused bc the ellimist stuff is kinda just inherently confusing lmao 

ok and I just love the characters,,,I love that the books switch perspectives, and KAA did such a masterful job of portraying differing and realistic reactions to their situation....like, all the animorphs react so differently to their circumstances, but their reactions are all so grounded in realism and also their personalities 

like man I love rachel. she was one of my favs as a kid too bc I always loved female characters and she was just so cool. and she still is, and so excellently written too 

liiiike the fact that even though she’s so tough and brave, she’s still a kid and has plenty of moments when she’s scared or uncertain...

and I just really like the fact that she out of all of them is the one who’s tough and loves to fight...and the fact that she also unapologetically loves shopping and stuff like that...its about the multifaced characters

just like how marco is the ‘funny guy’ but they make it very clear from the beginning that this is his way of coping w/shit like his family falling apart, and then alien BS 

and also marco is really smart? I kinda forgot abt that (sorry marco) but I like that bc that's uncommon to see with ‘funny’ characters

oh mannnn and ax. I love ax. I forgot a whole bunch about the early stuff w/him and how conflicted he was w/keeping secrets from the other animorphs

KAA did such a fantastic job w/ax - he really comes across as the perfect mix of ‘fish out of water alien’ and ‘young teen/tween’ and ‘alien from a strict militaristic society who is in training to become a soldier like his famous older brother’ 

n that was so sad n fucked up when he called the andalite home world and had to tell everyone (including his parents) that elfangor died, and then the elders or w/e forced ax to take blame for elfangor breaking their laws in order to preserve elfangor’s postmortem reputation, even at the cost of ax’s career/life :( 

and man I loved the part where ax is like ‘well, we didn't help the hork-bajir even tho we could have and now they're all enslaved. I'm not letting that happen to the humans’ and the council or w/e is like ‘well you should let it happen, don't interfere’ and ax basically realizes oh shit sometimes adults are wrong 

basically I love the conflict there, where the andalites are the ones who gave the yeerks the technology that led to them spreading across the galaxy like a disease, and now fight to stop them due to their guilt, but also refuse to directly help the less advanced species who are being invaded by the yeerks for fear of making a similar mistake like w/the yeerks....

ooooof and the part where ax is like ‘guess I have to go fight visser 3 and die’ :( he’s just a babyyyy

and augh when alloran asks them to kill him....geeeez there’s so much fucked up stuff already and I'm not even in the double digits yet 

oh my god and the brutally awful fact that any freed controller will just get tracked down by the yeerks and murdered so the secret invasion stays secret...and the animorphs think that by destroying the kandrona they've freed a bunch of controllers but really they just signed their death warrants - what a catch 22

oh and I love how even early on the yeerks aren't a completely unified force - we have the obvious rivalry w/visser 1 and visser 3, with visser 1 even arranging the animorphs release from visser 3′s prison bc of this, and that yeerk who told ax where to find visser 3 because he was pissed that his yeerk gf got killed by visser 3 - even though the reason she was killed was due to kandrona rationing, which was caused by the animorphs...i love the layers 

ok what else. oh yeah I love tobias sm, he was one of my favs as a kid too, his whole story is so deeply tragic but also interesting and we haven't even gotten into all the stuff w/his parents yet

the part where he’s freaking out as a hawk and he’s gonna fly into the windows even tho he knows it’ll probably kill him...christttt

also tobias and rachel are so romance aughhhh

ok also jake - he was never my favorite when I was younger bc I felt like he had Basic Protag Man Syndrome but now I can appreciate his character a lot more. like, he basically got elected the leader and he’s kinda like ‘guess I have to do this now.’ and that of course ends up fucking him up majorly in the long run bc even tho he’s more serious and responsible, he’s still just a kid too

and I loooove the horror of finding out that tom is a controller, and jake having to contend w/the fact that it’s very likely that he’ll have to fight and/or kill his brother someday 

also the book where jake gets infested w/a yeerk was one of my favs and still is. so fucked up and interesting. the fact that that yeerk was previously tom’s made it even more fucked, w/the yeerk taunting jake the whole time

and then the yeerk dying in jakes head...so messed up

omg and cassie too. I love cassie. I didn't appreciate her as much when I was younger bc I was a straightforward kid who liked action, and cassie is all about pacifism when possible and compassion, which I love a lot now that I Get it more. 

cassie being such a gentle person but still fighting in this fucked up war bc doing nothing would be worse is super compelling. plus the conflicts with her having to figure out where she and humanity fit in the circle of life and whatnot is great

I loved the contrast of her being very aware of how nature works bc of working w/her parents and all these injured animals, but also being so compassionate that it still bothers her to see death and especially participate in it 

like her feeling awful about killing the termite queen even tho its ‘just a bug’ and stuff

basically what makes the series great isn't that it’s got all these fucked up moments and horror elements and is overall quite dark - it’s that all of it comes together to make the point that war is hell, and child soldiers are gonna end up traumatized pretty much no matter what happens

it’s a very strong message, and the story never feels like it’s being dark just for the sake of being dark, but rather never letting the reader forget how awful things are

TL;DR: anirmorphs is to the YA genre what hunter x hunter is to the shounen genre

in animorphs, the heroes of the story are kids who get cool powers and get to fight aliens - in any other YA story they would have a bunch of fun adventures and come out on top most/all the time - things might get darker towards the end, but good would prevail. the evil yeerks would be stopped, and the main couples would get married and have kids and live happily ever after. 

however, war isn't like that, especially when the soldiers are kids. so instead we get animorphs, and it’s brutally realistic. they barely ever get to enjoy their powers - on the rare occasion that they get to, something usually goes horribly wrong

compare to hxh - it seems like a regular shounen story about kids participating in a fantastical mostly-adult world and being able to match the adults bc they're Special - but as the story wears on it becomes clear that the kids are just very traumatized. this all leads to gon’s berserker collapse in the chimera ant arc, which is led up to masterfully w/a bunch of adults treating gon as an adult even though he’s a child.

essentially the same thing happens in animorphs - with jake being shoved into the leader role and becoming a military general as a kid, which leads to him committing horrific war crimes because he’s been put in a position no child should ever have to be in

similarly, kurapika has what would be a very straightforward revenge plotline in any other story - but this is hxh, so the bad guys aren't just 2-dimensional evil caricatures, and the road to revenge just leads kurapika to ruin. we root for kurapika to win bc they’re a character we like, but it becomes clearer and clearer as the story goes on that getting revenge is not the path kurapika should be taking

nothing is ever as straightforward as we want it to be, basically. and the same applies to animorphs. so many times they're faced with conflicts that seem to have an obvious answer, only for it to be revealed later that the choices they made led to other unforeseen awful consequences

ok i need to stop rambling this is already super long. basically: animorphs good. I’ll probably do another post like this semi-soon as I continue reading (I'm partway thru book 10 now)

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #465

“the old man then prepares to die regretfully  /  that old man here is me”

Did you have a boyfriend in kindergarten? No, but I had a guy who wouldn't leave me alone since pre-k. Did you ever read the Magic Treehouse series? OMG I forgot about those!! I loved them!!! Did you ever watch The Land Before Time movies? AHHHHHHHHH yes!!! :') Did you collect anything when you were a kid? Stickers. My dresser was COMPLETELY covered in them. Who did you look up to most as a child? Steve Irwin, 100%. He was my hero. Did your parents let you drink soda when you were little? Some, yes. I wish they hadn't, with the dependency I have now. Did you ever watch The Powerpuff Girls or Dexter’s Laboratory? Of course! I strongly preferred the former, though. Did you watch Blue's Clues? HOW TIMELY. :'''') I did! My little sister and I loved it. What was your favorite kind of cake as a kid? Just gimme a good 'ole double chocolate cake and I was one happy kiddo, ha ha. Did you ever want to grow up? Sure didn't. I was smart. How often do you listen to classic rock? It varies, really. Sometimes I'm in the mood for it and binge it, other times I want newer music. What about country? Just about never. What is the most amount of money you have ever lost? Not a whole lot. I'm very careful with money. Have you ever hurt yourself just to get attention? No. Whenever I did it in the past, it was always to relocate the pain I was experiencing, and because I felt like I deserved it. Last person to get on your nerves? I'd rather not give it the time of day. Are you in any pain right now? No. Last thing you ate? It was one of those chocolate chip Clif Thins things. I HATE every Clif product I've ever tried until these, so they're a good option if I really want something sweet that's actually decently healthy and doesn't taste like I'm eating pure fiber, like most of their products. Name three things apart from trust and loyalty that you need in a relationship. Open, honest communication, similar interests as well as morals, and pro-LGBTQ+, if I'm just naming three. How far away are you from the place that you were born? Like... not even ten minutes. Do you live near anybody who creeps you out? Nah. Then again though I know pretty much nobody in my neighborhood. Is there anywhere that you are too afraid to go to alone? Where? Hm. If for whatever strange reason I had to, I would absolutely not want to go into a men's restroom alone. Would you be upset if you had a child who decided to make “adult films?” Despite the fact I don't negatively judge porn stars if they are smart, cautious, an informed about what they do and how to stay safe... I think I'd be very, very scared if my child wanted that, especially if it was my daughter, because she can actually get pregnant. Yes, abortion's an option, but... still. I don't want her to have to be faced with that decision. I also would be terrified of my hypothetical son getting someone pregnant, especially because he's then not the one with say on what happens to that child. So ultimately, if I was ever in this situation, I feel like I'd need to be alone with my partner to just cry for a while and then talk with them and look at the situation factually and with regard for my child's happiness. What pizza topping would you never, ever, EVER eat? Sardines. /gag What annoys you most about your computer? The microphone is broken. Do you prefer to read blogs or watch vlogs? I'm not huge on either, but watch vlogs. Do you know anyone who doesn’t celebrate Christmas? No. Do you own a snowglobe? I wish I did, they cute. What was the last thing that upset you? It was more disappointing than upsetting, but I was nevertheless super bummed that my bf had to scoot us hanging out a day back today when I was v excited for it. What is something you are behind on? It sounds unbelievable, I know, but I am IMMENSELY behind with Meerkat Manor: Rise of the Dynasty. Like, I'm somewhere around four episodes in. It's so hard to explain: like, I want to watch it badly, but I don't want to set aside time to sit in front of the TV to actually do it? It makes very little sense. I'll catch up eventually, I just... haven't yet. Who DO you go to for advice when you need it? Mom, Sara, my therapist... Will you go caroling this year? God no. Never have, never will. Would you ever be friends with someone who was suicidal? Bro what the fuck, of course I would. Would you rather have a daughter or a son? Daughter. Did you get bullied more as a child, a teenager, or an adult? I'm very grateful that I was never truly bullied. If you’re female, would you feel uncomfortable having a male gynecologist? FUCK YES. Are you allergic to your favorite animal? I wouldn't know; I've never been near one. :( What’s your favorite country besides the USA? Lol what a presumptuous question. Probably Africa. Did you get senior pictures taken? No, even though I wanted them. :/ I don't remember why I didn't? How often do you like to have sex? I don't care. Whenever it feels right. Are you any good at math? OH MY GOD NO Do you like Dairy Queen? I fucking love Dairy Queen. Ever had their Oreo Cupfection? *chef's kiss* If you had to get advice from someone of the opposite sex, who would you go to? Girt. Or my psychiatrist. Really depends. Does talking about sex make you feel uncomfortable? GODDAMN RIGHT IT DOES. Few things make me MORE uncomfortable. Are you more scared of going to the doctors or dentists? Doctors. Dentists are ezpz for me. At the doctor, meanwhile, I'm scared of them finding something seriously wrong. Do you get along with your significant other’s friends? I've only met one, and that was YEEEEAAARRRRSSS ago. He was chill, though. Do you enjoy the sound of crickets at night and birds in the morning? omfg YES Do you enjoy board games? Not really. Do you need a haircut? I actually just got one the other day. It's shorter than I would've liked, but it's whatever. Hair grows back, and mine does fast. Do you feel bad when you kill bugs? Yes. They've got the same right to be here as we do. What’s the longest stretch of time you’ve spent completely alone? A week or two when my mom and sis went to the beach (I think?) for a dance competition. Have you ever been in a situation where you needed a lawyer? Yes, when I presented my disability case. Do you know anyone who has been evicted? My mom, sister, and me because we couldn't keep up with rent. What’s your favorite macaron flavor? Never tried one. How often do you have friends over to your house? The only "friend" that comes over to my house is my boyfriend. Have you ever done a flip on a trampoline? Front flips, yes; never back flips, because I was scared of breaking my neck. What about a flip off of a diving board? No. Does your country have free healthcare? No, but it fucking should. What is your sexuality? Bro I don't even know anymore lmao. I just say pansexual. "Queer" might fit me best, though. I really don't know, but it doesn't really matter. What’s the last show you watched? Attack on Titan w/ Girt! I'm actually keen to see more of it. The darkness and heartbreak of it is right up my alley. How is your road rage? I don't really experience road rage because I'm too engulfed by terror to focus on anything else, honestly. Do you have any facial piercings? Yeah; I have a vertical labret in my lip. Have you ever been to a rehab center? So this is dumb as shit, but all the psych hospitals I've been to doubled as rehab centers. Which made NO goddamn sense because those who are suffering with mental illnesses leading to suicidal thoughts/tendencies are unique from those dealing with addiction; both require individual treatments and should not be grouped, imo. How long did your shortest relationship last? Not even a day. What would your life be like if you had married your first love? That's... scary to imagine. Sometimes, that was all I wanted. But seeing as he left because of my depression... it probably would have been catastrophic. He was the only person I ever wanted kids with, so there probably would have been children involved in all that madness, which no little one deserves. Him leaving ultimately led to my healing, too, so I don't know where I would've been mental health-wise if he stayed. What is the most difficult or time-consuming thing you’ve ever cooked? Would you make it again? I don’t cook. I need to learn, though... Have you ever had a platonic friend that everyone insisted you should be in a relationship with? He's my boyfriend now, ha ha ha. Is there anything about a person’s sexual past that might stop you from wanting to date them? Yes. I'm too lazy to get into that stuff rn, though. If someone asked your closest friends/family members what career path might suit you best, what do you think they would say? I'm almost certain they would all say veterinarian. How did you and your significant other celebrate your last anniversary? Slow down buddy, we haven't even been together a month lmao. Who was the last person to make you a home-cooked meal? What did they make? Mom, but I don't recall the last thing she made from scratch. Girt is doing that tomorrow, though! :') He's making grilled chicken stuffed with jalapenos and spinach and something else I can't remember and it sounds BANGIN'. What’s the weirdest, rudest, or most ridiculous thing a guest has ever done in your home? Hmmm... I'll have to get back to ya on that. Has anyone ever told you you’re manipulative? I think someone has, yes. Do you know anyone who owns their own business? Yep. Who was the recipient of your very first kiss? Jason. Do you prefer shrimp or crab? SHRIMP. Crab is mushy and disgusting. Do you prefer fiction or non-fiction books/movies? I strongly prefer fiction. Have you ever seen an eclipse? Plenty of lunar eclipses, yes. Who is your favourite video game character? Pyramid Head, Spyro, Cynder... I have a lot, those three are just panning out as strong contenders. Are you the type of person who knows exactly what they want in life? lol Do you have commitment issues? Not at all. What was the last thing you felt nostalgic about? uhhh Does anyone in your family smoke? My dad. Have you ever had a pet escape and run away? OMG one time in his prime, Teddy got loose on a snowy night and went on a full-blown adventure. I was SOBBING. My dad had to chase him down. Do any of your exes know each other? Juan knows Jason, Jason knows Juan and Girt, and Sara knows Girt. What’s an opinion you find impossible to take seriously? "Vaccines cause autism." Fuck out my face. What was the very first election you voted in? This most recent presidential one.

[hypnotixstorm]

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* to do list *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Key

Normal Text = Have NOT started working on the request

Bold and Pink Text = I am CURRENTLY working on the request

Once I have completed a request it will be REMOVED from this list

Can I get an imagine of Hiei from Yu Yu Hakusho? Maybe an AU hundreds of years ago where he ends up caring for a human woman and teaching her how to defend herself. If you don't like that one, anything you think of.

Character: Kanda from DGM NSFW Prompt: "Make me." Love youuuuuu 😘

How about a NSFW scenario of Kakashi coming home to his sweet little naughty civilian S/O? 😜 A bit of role play where they call him sensei while he's doing them on the kitchen table?

Thanks for the Soi Bean Post! This gonna be my last Soi Fon request. Sorry for being quite a Soi Queen freak. For my request can you Soi after shower decides to wear s/o clothes. S/O tries to take picture of her. Then she tells that she has falling in love with you. You have changed let me take care of you. You can be very very very sluff on this one. Thanks!

ok ok so i have a few requests 🥺🥺 so! first could you maybe do an “I missed you.” with Rukia? 🥺💗 just fluff for my baby girl aaaa

Ichigo kissing his s/o in the rain 😆😆😆 Headcanons or scenario is up to you! 💙

ANYTHING SHIKAMARU. Deadass anything

Hey! I was wondering if I could request some Rukia x fem!reader relationship headcannons? Only if you're able to! Tysm! 💖

I hope requests are open but I was wondering if you could do something with byakuya and his s/o being like a very intimidating couple but his s/o is actually very sweet to everyone?

Kakashi x reader and instead of team 7 its now y/n tryna see whats under the mask and eventually she just asks and he actually reveals it adfhsjjs

Can I please get rat dad Ging being seduced by a younger woman who refuses to take “no” for an answer until he finally gives her what she wants? NSFW please! 💖

ok so please don't feel pressured to write this birthday imagine 🥺 i know u have a lot of requests rn ah. but! if you're able to i really would love another toshiro one bc i'm a sucker for him 😭 maybe one where he's really overworking himself so the reader helps him relax and it just ends in cuddles 🥺💓 only if you're able to! ilysm 💓💖💓💖💓💘💓💘💓

ok i swear this is the last one i feel bad requesting sm 😭 but maybe a “Do you wanna, maybe, go out sometime?” with toshiro bc he really is best boy 🥺👉🏻👈🏻

OKAY SO ANOTHER ONE WITH SABURO WITH UHHHH GOING ON A FIRST DATE WITH HIS S/O ICIXHAJGSSHSSUSKSU he'll probs driving his van around with the music blasting out 👀👀

honestly i would kinda die if u wrote some renji smut 😳😳 literally in any situation, i'm just needy rn 😭

ok ok i'm here hehe. how about, the reader gets really injured during a battle and shiro's kinda blaming himself for it. kindaaa angst into a super fluffy ending if that's ok hhh 🥺

Hi 🥰 Can I get a headcanon for Kakashi with a really seductive s/o, like she likes to tease him in public and whispers dirty things in his ear and calls him daddy? Nsfw pls? 😊😁

“make me” and hisoka??? thank you

hehe this is for the 🦋🦋 event! congrats on 200 bb!! so, i saw attack on titan on your list and i'm experiencing a severe lack of my best boy marco 🥺🥺 if you don't write for him that's fine hehe, but if you do, could i please maybe get a lil scenario where marco helps the reader out with her training and then they accidentally confess their feelings and it's just rlly fluffy and cute? 🥺 i need marco being happy in my life rn sbdjdhdjr 💓💓

“If you keep biting your lip like that, I’m holding you accountable for my actions.” for Kakashi please! I love him 🤤

If your requests are still open, can i ask for some domestic kakashi fluff? Ty

Hi mommas❤️❤️ CAN I PWEASE request some Guren (seraph of the end) relationship headcanons ? Not nsfw but maybe a little steamy 🥺🥰 I LOVE UU -🍒

Hi Chloe 🥰 Can I have some spicy nsfw headcanons for Yami where his s/o is acting really bratty during sex and he puts her in her place? 😪😂😊

Kageyama wirh Oikawas sister reader? there just chillin Nd stuff and toru comes over and picks y/n up and they hug and kageyama is like “eXcuSe mE???” forgive my spelling im on mobile lmao

Hiii❤️❤️ Can I request an imagine where you live in a small town and work at a cafe and Bakugou is your cliche small town boyfriend? Or headcanons! The idea is so cute and I love your writing 😊

okay so uHHHHH you can just go for Mephisto sharing some food with his s/o owo;; take your time on it too because i know it's gonna be really great either way!

A reader insert saved by vampire! main YYH crew from a pack of werewolves

Since you said requests are open maybe.. suga subbing for you? Idk he's just always appeared like someone who would love to please you in anyway possible.

V A M P I R E LAVI!!! DO IT GIRL!! 👌👌♥️♥️♥️

Fake dating with Lavi!!!!! Need more of the DGM boyz!! 😂

can I get an itachi x reader fic where it's itachi's birthday and the reader decides to give him a special night (👀), wearing lingerie, lighting candles, etc. for him to come home to? I love your work (and you!!) sm btw 🥺💞 - nina!! (@kunoichihatake)

hello ✨💕 it’s me, ryn 😘 if it’s okay, can i request a nishinoya x female!reader? perhaps a first date at the boardwalk with like the rides and carnival stuff? then at the end of the date he kisses her and it turns out the karasuno squad was following them the whole night hehe?

Hi! Can I request a prompt of some soft Kakashi, maybe some cuddles, perhaps it gets a little heated... a lil' Nsfw never hurt nobody👀👅 Thank you so muuch!~😍❤️

If I had kakashi in front of me I would tell him “aren’t you tired of being the most handsome man here?”

Hi! I saw that requests were open for the Haikyuu!! boys so here I am! I was wondering if I could request a Tsukki x reader where Tsukki has a crush on the reader but doesn't know how to express his feelings other then throwing insults. it can be angsty or fluffy I just really love Tsukki as a tsundere lol. (also btw I LOVE your theme and blog aesthetic its very pretty!)

Hey wifey😚 so Ichigo has stolen my heartttt can I get the strawberry boy with an S/O who gets super shy with with physical contact? Tyy💗💗

Fake dating with Lavi!!!!! Need more of the DGM boyz!! 😂

NSFW Vampire Squall (FF8) for very obvious reasons because UUUUUUGH

Hello there miss, my name is kandaxxx. Nice to meet you since I have definitely never requested from you before and this is definitely my first time and i am definitely not taking advantage of your bomb writing skills to ask you to write a “Choke me, daddy.” for Seymour from FF (love you forever and always!!!!!!)

hey butterfly 🥺 can you please write a story where the reader and (any character) are fighting and it turns out it was just about something stupid? like chicken nuggets? thank you 🥺💗

Eek! DGM! I was wondering if you would do a request for a general Allen Walker relationship HC? I don’t see him on the character list, but I’m just curious *bows* Thankyou senpai!

Spin The Bottle with any of the DGM characters that you're comfortable writing????? (but like obviously when Kanda spins the bottle it has to land on the reader [me] because YOU KNOW WHY OK????????) ilysm!!! 😍

I’m thinking a smut scenario of some kind that uses the prompts “Perhaps I need to remind you of your place.” and “Let me show you what happens to little brats who don’t follow the rules.” I feel like those are very Nozel Silva things to say. 😈 -bakubabes-hatake

Omfg HI mommy, Can i request really fluffy and soft itachi after he comes back from a mission? Non-massacre AU and you’re on the same team as sasuke lolol thirsty for them age gaps ❤️ thank youuuu ily -🍒

Can I get a fake dating with Kand--Roy Mustang (hahahaha) 👉👈🥺

Is this okay to ask for? Egor taking care of s/o who has period cramps... Ty!

can I get an itachi x reader fic where it's itachi's birthday and the reader decides to give him a special night (👀), wearing lingerie, lighting candles, etc. for him to come home to? I love your work (and you!!) sm btw 🥺💞 - nina!! (@kunoichihatake)

Hello! Can I please request some headcanons for Kiba with a S/O with a praise kink? And for Shikamaru with a S/O with a choking kink? Thank you so much.

Wow. Here is me putting in a request. Shocker, right?? 😂 I want some Greed, baby 😈 as for the prompt, it's not in your list, but could you maybe do something based off of "Oh my god. Did we just break the bed?" ???? 👉👈

It's a shame u only have one ling request, so could I request some Ling x Reader where they're both absolutely oblivious until Lan Fan or Ed or someone finally just tells them for them? Sorry if I didn't make any sense ❤️❤️

ok idk if you write threesomes but 😳😳 if you could write one with daichi and suga n maybe some dp, i'd probably die 🥺💓 only if you're comfortable with that tho ♡

Tyki flirting with his crush in his native language of Portuguese? I really love your work and please have some candy 🍬🍭🍫

hi butterfly! 🥰 i hope you're doing well! you already know what i'm going to ask you for — a request! i just feel really down in the dumps lately. can i request headcanons for an s/o that takes graduation pictures on their grandmother's 3 year death anniversary with kenma, nishinoya & kuroo? i hope you can do my request! you don't have to do it if you don't want to!

hehehe kuroo, tsukki and kageyama headcanons of their s/o sending them a nude while they at training and them making an excuse to get home and fUcK yOu SeNsELeSs - 🌊

Hello may I request itachi x reader. People learned the truth and he can finally return to his wife and children in the village 🥺 and they don’t have to be in secret anymore

holy shit,, i am starved for the squall content,,, if you don't mind, catching you wearing their clothes?

S/O walking in on kakashi masturbating? 👉👈 💕

[axther]

For CH/JJBA Basic info: straight female, 5'4, Scorpio! If it matters my mbdi is debater, which I think is accurate. I'm a bit curvy/soft and I have really long wavy hair and glasses. Now for fun stuff! I'm a split between being very hyperactive (almost like a puppy lmao) or very quiet (not shy, but more indifferent. I've been told I'm intimidating) I'm into polyrelationships so the more boys the merrier. I like hiking and sports when I'm with people but don't do it by myself cause it's boring. 1

HERE’S UR FOOD QUEEN. also tumblr got me fucked up w no CH gifs :(

Cute Earth High Defense Club Love (Season One) V1

#1 is…Atsushi! 

He’s the most normal out of all the characters, to be honest

When he sees you, it’s nothing spectacularity radiant, per se

There’s a pretty girl in his school! cool! 

The strangest part is that it’s an all-boys school, so naturally, he’s confused

Through a series of plot shenanigans, you’re there as an exchange student

And he’s been told he has to help you get settled!! 

He introduces you to the Earth Defense Club, and slowly you two grow acclimated with each other 

While you’re friendly to everyone else, there’s something different between you and him 

It’s chemistry, and even Ryuu wouldn’t dare poke it 

One afternoon, someone asks you out via love letter, all the extra stuff

And you turn them down as politely as you can 

But thanks to the indifference, the boy gets offended 

He turns into a letter-shaped monster, and the Battle Lovers have to step in 

Atsushi is both appalled and terrified 

Did the monster hurt you??

Why did the monster appear around you? 

Was it something to do with you? 

He spends half of the battle just covering you 

And once the monster starts spewing slander, Atsushi is having none of it.

Whatever the monster says, Atsushi refutes, defending you until the rest of the battle is at a standstill and he’s just bickering with the monster. 

Eventually, Atsushi practically makes the monster choke on respect women juice, and on behalf of the passed out student, Atsushi begins apologising non-stop to you

You’re confused as hell 

The internet-famous Battle Lovers know you??

All you can see is the blurred out faces, and the blue one, the self-declared Piercing Prince, Epinard, seems to be constantly hanging over you 

And honestly 

He’s a cutie 

This results in a sailor moon-esque situation 

Where you have a crush on Epinard, Atsushi has a crush on you, and he’s miserable upon realising what he’s done 

Does he reveal that he’s Epinard???

Honestly, probably not on purpose  

I can absolutely see them talking about it and he’s like ‘do i always have to yell out im Epindard’ and he turns and sees you 

And you’re like ‘????? excuse me???’ 

Which results in more shenanigans 

#2 is…Yumoto! 

babey boye 

He falls for the flirting every time 

He reciprocates as best as he can, but for the most part, it’s just him being soft 

He hugs you so much omfg 

It gives Wombat a break, and though you don’t know he’s a talking wombat, he’s all for you being there 

What’s interesting is that he’s telling everyone he’s gonna marry you

And since most of the ppl in the school are bros, no one’s told you 

Which gets awkward 

Because he’s 200% told you that he loves you 

But you take it as ‘:D! I love platonic love between my Friends! :D!’ 

So it becomes a Situation that everyone gets second-hand embarrassment from 

Yumoto has told his brother that he’s gonna marry you and you’d be the bathhouse’s Okami 

But you’re thrown for a loop when Gora asks you when you and Yumoto started dating 

And you’re like ‘??????’ 

This results in a brief but stern conversation between Gora and Yumoto 

And Yumoto feels guilty, of course

But you’re so sweet! And you flirt with him!! Doesn’t that mean you like him??

It’s a bit of a wakeup call, but he’s still only got two brain cells

You gotta cut him some slack 

For about a day, he chills out, though he’s melancholy 

After that he’s back to being oblivious and sweet 

#3 is…Kinshiro! 

Did someone say ‘emotionally constipated teenager who’s in a rivalry with his childhood best friend for the girl they like but he has no idea how to approach her due to the fact stated above (he is emotionally constipated)’???

no????

Ok that’s valid

But you want a polyamorous relationship???

He and Atsushi are gonna be your best bet. 

This boye is completely lost when it comes to wooing you 

He thinks you’re graceful in a quiet sense

And while you’re a flirt and a meme lord, you’re also yourself 

Ibushi notices almost off the bat 

And he’s like ‘my guy, my dude...my cousin??? Fr???’ 

Kinshiro is crazy confused and embarrassed 

He’s always considered himself to have tunnel vision

But then you pass by and he gets a whiff of your shampoo and 

Oh no 

he gets kinda lightheaded and blushy but wipes it away fast 

Whenever you pop by to say hi to Ibushi he completely freezes 

Like he just stops moving altogether

 It’s something you, Ibushi, and Akoya have noticed 

Y’all exchange glances every time he freezes while sipping tea 

The MOMENT he realises you like Epinard he gets lowkey pissed

 Do you seriously like that barbaric, stupid Battle Lover??

He’s like ‘I’m elite, graceful, rich. I’m the better choice :(‘ 

Make him drink just a bit of respect women juice 

But he’ll be very, very soft for you

And after he finds out about Atsushi being Epinard and Atsushi likes you?? 

Well, it’s two birds with one stone 

He’ll do his best to hint that he likes you, but Akoya and Ibushi have to help him along 

Especially Ibushi, since he’s your cousin 

Get ready for a flood of thoughtful but expensive gifts

Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure V2 

(Note: If you want a poly relationship, all three of these lads have convenient best friends...👀)

#1 is…Josuke!! 

Mans is a himbo (refer to chat) 

Sure he’s got like, one brain cell, but it’s dedicated to you!! 

He’s a bit of a flirt, too, so be ready to fend off the fangirls 

Since fangirls in the 90’s were chiller than ones in, say, the 80’s, they mostly respect that he’s got a girlfriend 

But the moment one of them tries to hurt a hair on your head, it’s game over 

Now

The thing about it is that you get shy 

But your shy is looking scary as hell 

So all they see is a glare that would make the devil run, and they bail 

Josuke relates to your fear of bugs!!

He’s not fond of turtles, so you guys can have each other’s back!! 

If you want to draw him something, he can and will frame it in the best frame he can convince Joseph to buy 

Is it gold foil?? Maybe 

Before y’all get together, he pines like no other 

He’ll start frequenting places you go to just because he wants to see you

And he doesn’t think it’s creepy but gets worried that you will 

But he thinks you’re incredible 

It’s something makes him short circuit a bit 

You: :) 

Josuke: Now Playing: Beautiful Girl (Alternate Version) [Tempo Track] - Jimmie Thompson, Gene Kelly & Lennie Hayton (Singin’ In The Rain) (1952) 

#2 is…Johnny!

Southern boye drank his respect women juice after he got shot 

And once he sees you???

He CHUGS it 

First off this is like the late 1880’s so anyone who bathes is probably stellar 

So he, too, has the Joestar Blessing of having Beautiful Girl play on repeat 

But as soon as you start flirting???

He’s GONE 

I mean this in the most literal sense 

He’s a good Christian boye (theoretically) 

So once you talk about dating him he flushes bright red

He’s aware that you’re just flirting, but oh hmmm 

He starts crushing fast 

Plus if you don’t judge him or think he’s weaker for being in a wheelchair? 

Give him a second he’s trying to find a ring 

He might be in a wheelchair but he’s in no way inadequate, if you get what I mean 👀

(who am I kidding, of course you do) 

Considering that memes weren’t much of the thing in the 1800’s if you find some, he probably wouldn’t understand them 

But he does enjoy when you play the piano 

But let’s say there’s a stand attack

And you just bust out knives??? 

instant boner 

#3 is… Joseph!

Flirt, but times two 

Y’all make anyone blush 

No one’s safe 

And with each other??

It can get foul, fast 

Does Lisa Lisa step in?? 

No, not really 

She’s not gonna interfere at Joseph’s chances of getting laid 

Plus she approves so!! 

Catch him trying to flex while you’re around 

Be it him trying to beat Cesar’s ass (and failing) or literally flexing, he wants to impress you 

And while he knows that you’re a flirt for the sake of being one, he also gets a bit nervous when you flirt with others

Especially if he hasn’t confessed, actually confessed, yet

Plus, he’s got a special arm 👀

Y’all know what’s up 

@matchupdomain @peeshposheddie

[crackinglamb]

7,15, 18, 28, 37 for fic writer questions! Thank you!

@natsora out here makin’ me think this early in the day....

Thank you, though, truly.  I love doing these.  I’m going to put this under a cut, because it came out really long.

7: Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

From Junkyard Dogs:

“Hancock?” she asked after a while.

“Hmm?”

“How am I going to do this?” He was silent for a moment as he framed his thoughts, enjoying the silk of her hair running through his fingers, clinging to him with static. She was relaxed, almost boneless, as the heat of the water worked a magic on her tense muscles no amount of chems could do.

“You’ll do what you gotta. You and me, we’re like junkyard dogs. We find a scrap of something and call it ours. We defend it, fight off anything that comes our way and take no prisoners. We fight with anything that comes to hand, even our teeth and nails. Everything becomes a tool in our hands. The Institute will be no different.”

Obviously, this is from whence the fic gets its title.  This was my very first published piece of fanfiction.  The lines Hancock says describe the entire tone of the story in just a few words.  Sometimes I surprise myself with that sort of thing.  This is also my most popular and ‘successful’ work, although Flash In the Pan is catching up.  I’m proud of it still, even though I don’t write for the Fallout 4 fandom anymore, simply because it was first, it was proof I could still write (it had been a long time), and that people liked what I created.  Personal and public validation in one.

15: If you could choose one of your fics to be filmed, which would you choose? 

...I have no idea.  I just sat here for a solid five minutes thinking about it and not a one came to mind that couldn’t already be done with the right mods and editing software, since all of my work comes from video games.

Not to mention, considering my penchant for writing explicit content, the rating on that would be...prohibitive.

18: Do you use any tools, like worksheets or outlines? 

Not especially.  I’ll make notes for myself at the end of a document to keep myself on track or jot down ideas to be fleshed out later.  That’s about as far as I go with outlining.

28: Share three of your favorite fic writers and why you like them so much. 

(For all my other lovelies out there, please don’t feel snubbed.  I love you all, but this ask is just for 3 faves, so I will go with the ones that I read over and over.)

words-writ-in-starlight, because OMFG the levels of emotional intensity make me feel incredible, indescribable things.

MizDirected, because the sheer intricacy of the butterfly effect combined with the truly stellar psychological horrors therein is what inspired me to write my very own canon divergent ME fic.  I cannot compare to that, nor do I try to, but I enjoy every moment of reading their epic Future Imperfect.  The volume alone was at first intimidating, but then I literally couldn’t walk away, couldn’t stop, even when my heart was breaking and I was ugly crying at my computer at 3 in the morning.  I have read all 988K words four times.  In a year.

And finally, Azellma.  I will read anything by this author, anything.  I have devoured each and every one of their works, regardless of fandom.  Again, levels of talent and thought that I simply don’t have in me, but that’s okay.  Cuz I can enjoy theirs and get lost in the word sauce happily.  Seeing an update email fills me with squee.

37: Talk about your current wips.

This is a list, you realize.  I have like...five.  No, I don’t have a life, why do you ask?

Racing Down the Barrel: a sequel and part two of my series Soldier, Spectre, Savior.  Mass Effect trilogy retelling with canon divergence, namely that Garrus and Shepard were already a couple before the events of ME1.  Headcannons galore, thought out reasoning behind paragon choices, true love.

Maker Damned Fools - Fluffy Version: my first attempt to write Dragon Age.  Again with some divergence because canon does not spark joy.  Varric/Female Hawke pairing.  I will go down with that ship.  Part of the Fluff-uary 2020 series, a prompt challenge that I am co-creator of with @ir0n-angel.  The basic premise of this will eventually be expanded into a longfic.

Cross-Species Liaisons: the other part of the Fluff-uary 2020 series, this being all Mass Effect.  Shakarian and Shryik.  Post canon ficlets for Jayne and Garrus, interspersed ficlets for Henna and Nihlus, with some Henna and Garrus thrown in soon.

Accidental Synchronicity: the aforementioned headcannons?  Yeah, one of those became this.  Jack/Thane.  Short, not so sweet although it has its moments, almost finished.  One of two works of mine that actually needs the archive warning ‘Major Character Death’, which I usually don’t write and don’t tend to read, honestly.  But you can’t save them all, and it’s already established in my timeline that Thane will remain true to his canon arc.  Uh...spoilers.

Some Kind of Resolution: a Nihlus fix-it.  Turned poly on me, which shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone who knows me.  Don’t make me choose between turians; I have an alternate solution.  It was initially only going to be the first game.  Then of course Garrus popped up his head and said ‘what about me?’  And...yeah... now it will span the entirety of the trilogy.  Gonna be long, this one is, I foresee it being a second fic of mine that breaks 100K words.  Currently on hiatus while I work on Fluff-uary stuff, since it’s the only WIP without a backlog of already completed chapters.

[mtvswatches]

Crazy Ex Girlfriend 4x08 I’m Not the Person I Used to Be

Stray thoughts

1) OMG I’m Other Rebecca!

2) This looks like a smut fanfic…

…except no one asked for it?

3) OMG!! What is it with Rebecca and shit?

REBECCA: Hey, I'm sorry I stunk up the toity yesterday.

JOSH: Oh, no problem. Made my eyes tear up, but, uh, I needed a good cry.

4) I fucking love when this show goes all meta!

5) And they did it again!!!

HEATHER: How long are you here for?

VALENCIA: For the rest of the series! …of holidays, I mean.

Is this going to be a thing in this episode? Because I love it!!

6) This scene was – in Heather’s words – THE BEST.

Okay, based on your face when you were looking at the guest list, my guesses are we're dealing with a frenemy, a nemesis or an ex. So it's an ex. Wait, no. But you dated Josh all through high school. So you cheated.  Oh, you really cared about this person. Oh, my God, you were in love. And nobody knows. Whoa. This is so juicy. Wait, wait, was it a girl? Oh, it was the first girl. Wait, is she here yet? Have you seen her? Oh, okay. So she's not here yet, but she's on the list. Okay, I am on it, I am gonna figure this all out.

I just love how well they know each other, and even though this is obviously exaggerated and played for laughs, it’s a quite accurate depiction of female friendship. When you really know your friends, it’s quite easy to read them and know what they’re thinking just by looking at their facial expressions.

7) So this is the episode, this is the episode where he gets back? Right? Btw, I nearly died when this happened…

REBECCA: Anyway, am I… I can't believe I'm saying this Am I meant to be with Nathaniel or Josh or both or neither?

VALENCIA: Neither.

HEATHER: Neither.

REBECCA: Right, of course. Because the idea of "meant to be" is a lie perpetuated by Western culture.

VALENCIA: No. You're meant to be with Greg.

HEATHER: Wait, you think that? I totally think that.

VALENCIA: Everyone thinks that.

Seriously, it made me feel so good inside and giddy to hear both of them validate how I FEEL. Yes, Rebecca is meant to be with Greg.

Now I’m getting nervous because I know he’ll show up soon. It is his high school reunion, after all. But “he” won’t be “he”anymore, and I’m not sure if the show will be able to pull off this switcharoo you know? Okay, I have to continue watching, don’t I?

8) I see what you’re doing, show…

REBECCA: Okay, look, the only way the only way… The only way Greg would ever be my "meant to be" is if we were in some sort of sci-fi weird parallel alternate universe where he was just a completely different person.

I swear to god, I just got chills when I heard his voice in the background. I’m not ready for this. I’ve been waiting two years for Greg to be back and yet this wasn’t what I was waiting for? What if I don’t like Greg anymore? I’m scared! Okay, I’m going to hit play again…

9) So here he is…

He does look Greg-ish, I must admit.

So, the idea is that this is how Greg has always looked to everyone but since Rebecca wasn’t mentally stable at the time they were together she saw him differently? Is that it? I mean, we always tend to see people differently after some time apart. And Rebecca has changed a lot since Greg last saw her, so that’s probably why she’s seeing him differently. Both of them have probably changed a lot.

10) OMG they did it again, the entire conversation!

GREG: No, I'm-I'm here on winter break. I'm actually back for the whole rest of the series… of holidays. Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's and the finale…. Valentine's Day.

HECTOR: Valentine's Day. I guess that is the logical end of our series… of holidays.

11)

12) I love Heather so much…

13) Josh had a literally one good thing going on in his life right now – being prom king at his reunion – and it was all a lie!

14) Now, this was quite a revelation…

GREG: I got to confess, I've been back a few times.

REBECCA: You have?

GREG: Yeah, uh, I just thought it would be best if you and I didn't see each other.

REBECCA: So you were back in town and no one told me?

GREG: Well, I may have asked them not to. I did. Yeah, I did.

Question is… does he know about Rebecca and his dad? And everything that happened in the last two years?

15) The clean slate thing works considering he is literally a different person – at least physically, what he says sounds pretty Greg-ish to me – but it’s the easy way out for Rebecca… Sleeping with Greg’s dad is probably at the top of the worst things she’d done (and yes, I’m including pushing Trent off the balcony.)

16) OMG we’re getting a new Greg and Rebecca song, I can’t believe it.

Okay, show, I think you did it. You got Greg back and you didn’t piss me off in doing so. And of course the Greg and Rebecca song is amazing and it’s the first one this season that I actually love. I had to go back and watch it again.

I really didn’t believe they could pull this off, and I really don’t know how they did it, but it worked? Listening to these two sing to each other about their history together and seeing them reconnect… my heart was swelling with joy.

Also, I loved the fact that they made it clear Greg is still sober.

Is it weird that even though he’s clearly a different person, I do see Greg?

17) Man, I loved every Heather/Valencia scene in this episode! And damn, Valencia, that story is the thing great love stories are made of!

18) So… does Greg’s dad really have to talk to him about sleeping with Rebecca or was Greg trying to get Rebecca to fess up?

19) Yes, Rebecca, you make total sense…

I mean, he basically told her he didn’t feel for his ex-girlfriend the same way he’d felt for her, right? I wouldn’t want to fess up either...

20) WAIT, WHAT?!!!

HEATHER: What? It was Father Brah?

VALENCIA: Joseph. He never got the letter. My love letter was in his jacket in Hector's trunk for 12 years?!

OMFG this show just blew my mind!! He was going to marry Valencia and Josh, right? He was always giving Josh advice about his relationship with her? Is this why he decided to become a priest? WHAT IN THE HELL?!

21) I’m HEATHER, THIS IS HOW I FEEL WATCHING THIS EPISODE!!

22) A GEORGE SONG?!!! CAN THIS EPISODE GET ANY BETTER?!!!

Another catchy tune!! Love the Hollaback Girl homage! And I laughed so hard! “We learned to cry while you were popular!”

23) My shipping heart is killing me right now…

24) Oh, dang, indeed!

25) OH ME GERDS!!

Paula is going to freak out when she reads all those texts, isn’t she?

26) I SHIP THIS? A PRIEST AND A PARTY PLANNER?

What is this episode doing to me?

27) thIS FUCKING EPISODE, I SWEAR TO GOD!

Okay, it makes sense, Valencia is in a good relationship and she is very much in love with her girlfriend. And I’m sure Father Brah didn’t become a priest just because Valencia didn’t choose him. At least they got closure and knowing the truth about what happened definitely changes how they will look back on those memories.

28) OMG they were about to kiss and she told him!

I’m kind of sad she ruined the moment, but it had to be done. Good for you, Honest Rebecca, I’m proud!

29) Greg’s reaction was not what I had expected. He did freak out a little, but he was mostly surprised at how Rebecca came clean and owned up to probably the shittiest thing she could’ve done to him. He didn’t punch any walls (awwing at the reference!) And yes, Rebecca has changed, too. For the better. Old Rebecca? She would’ve lied and schemed and manipulated to prevent him from finding out until ultimately everything would’ve blown up in her face.

And I loved the fact that he’s the one to acknowledge they both have changed.

30) Paula’s ending scene!! I loved her reaction to all the texts from Rebecca as if she was seeing the situation unfold in front of her in real time. It was perfect!

31) This episode… is definitely my favorite episode this season! I just loved EVERYTHING about it? The Heather/Valencia/Father Brah B plot, Greg’s return, Hector’s obsession with the speech and the 2-hours lunch, Rebecca’s texts, the songs, the meta!

It was an amazing episode that reminded us why we love this show so much and why it is SO GOOD.

The writers knew the odds were against them in bringing back Greg with a different actor in the role, so they brought their A game and delivered a nearly perfect episode, one that I’m sure will be remembered as one of the best in the series.

And of course they had to amp up the meta jokes in this one - they were bringing back one of their main characters but played by a different actor, they had to make a meta-commentary about it. But I really enjoyed how organically they weaved the behind the scenes stuff into the storyline - they made the fact that they were recasting a character emotionally relevant for the characters.

I also love how all the storylines had a common thread and in a way reflected back to Rebecca’s storyline - Father Brah and Valencia missing their shot kind of echoes Greg and Rebecca’s story, although they might get a second chance now; Josh discovering this whole new side to the high school experience he’d never noticed before kind of mirrors Rebecca seeing Greg in a new light; Paula missing out on the events of the whole night and catching up in a few minutes probably mirrors Greg’s journey in this episode.

I was very hazy about the decision to cast a different actor to play Greg, but I also knew that if any show and any group of writers could pull it off, it was CEG. And God bless them, they did! I’m not saying I’m totally sold on New Greg yet, but I feel like I will. I feel like I will grow to love this Greg as well. And I think the fact that they were able to achieve that - the possibility of viewers falling in a love with a recast character - is a feat in itself.

This show is such a blessing, I swear! I can’t wait to rewatch this episode!

Sorry if I got a bit rambly and incoherent there, I just enjoyed this episode a lot!

32) Hope you enjoyed my recap, and, as usual, if you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi.Thanks!

[angelearnshaw]

THOR: RAGNAROK- THE PERFECT ENDING

I know most of you have probably seen Thor: Ragnarok by now, but for those of you that haven’t, you should probably go see it while you still can!

I have to say, this is by far, the best Thor movie I’ve seen. And if it happens to be the last, well, I don’t mind (brb crying in a corner). But really. If this is the last Thor movie, it would serve as the perfect ending to the franchise.

I have always been a fan of Thor. No, it’s not because of Chris Hemsworth’s drool- worthy everything. It might be partly because of Tom Hiddleston, but mostly, mostly, it was actually my love for mythologies that made me appreciate it. As a lover of literature, mythologies have always been my favourite. And there’s so little about Norse mythology, that I was glad it got a chance to be made into such a spectacular, phenomenal movie, starring such talented actors.

With that being said, let’s delve into everything there is to love and look forward to when it comes to Thor.

(Warning: as always, spoilers ahead)

1. THE HUMOR

I did read an article stating that Tom Hiddleston admitted this would be the funniest Thor ever (I am using a lot of superlatives, I know. It’s just that great!)

And well, he wasn’t lying.

See, Chris Hemsworth is this unfairly, annoyingly perfect human being. I mean, he looks like a god, he can act, he can sing, he is a great dad to his kids, and it turns out, he can be funny. Countless interviews and even that little segment he did where Thor was taking a break with Darryl (see youtube video here, if you haven’t already: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_mizUMlvUc)

So yeah, the beginning of the movie already had me laughing. (*spoiler content*) Thor was trapped in a cage talking to a skeleton I was like “wtf?” But what did it for me was when he was being interrogated by that fiery dude (don’t know how to spell his name) and he was swinging on the chain Oh.My.God. You would have to have watched it to understand.

The chain was rotating him around and every time he had his back to the evil dude, he would be like “Hold on.” And “I swear to God, I’m not doing this. It’s doing this on its own.” And it turns out, a lot of it was improvised. So bless you, Chris Hemsworth for your near perfection and humor.

 Of course, Tom Hiddleston also had his funny moments. One was when he was kidnapped by the great wizard, Dr. Strange. When he came out of the portal, he was like, “I’ve been falling for thirty minutes!” And I’m sure we’ve all seen the clip where Hela goes “Kneel.” And Loki is just like, “who dafuq does this bitch thinks she is? That’s my line!”

Also, ALSO! When Hulk comes out- Loki’s reaction is just pricless- omfg! You guys, you have got to love Tom Hiddleston for all the sass and attitude and facial expressions he can fit in Loki’s character.

2. THE CAST

Thor brings back familiar faces like Loki, Heimdall and *surprise, surprise* Odin. We even get a scene of Volstagg and Fandral there. But, we also have a slew of new characters. One, being Surtur (big, fiery dude I was talking about.) We also have big, bad Hela. And of course, Valkyrie.

Before we talk about the new characters, let’s talk about the old ones.

Loki. Loki. Loki. He has got to be my most favourite villain of all time. At the beginning of the movie, he is living it up as Odin and even builds a statue of himself. Of course, Thor (even though he isn’t the smartest Avenger) eventually figures it out. They have a somewhat happy reunion, before Thor asks for Odin.

Odin has been on Earth for some time, stripped of his power. He ends up in Norway (big nod to Norse mythology right there) and ends up dying in a sprinkle of golden little lights. Before he dies, he is somewhat able to explain about Hela ( who we’ll talk about later). But Odin, being Odin, he doesn’t stay dead and still appears to Thor in somewhat weird and creepy visions, and he’s sassy too. He goes like “Are you the god of hammers?” Well, excuse you All Father

Volstagg and Fandral. This is the part I do not like of the film. They were such lovable, lovable characters and Hela killed them without blinking. Like wtf? They survived this long only to die like that? WHY MARVEL? WHYYYYY. I mean, Pietro’s death is still fresh!!!

Heimdall. Our watcher has turned into some sort of Asgardian vigilante. He’s running from the law after what he did in Thor: The Dark World, but he also keeps the citizens of Asgard safe while Loki and Thor are stuck on the other side of the universe. Good job, Heimdall! You deserve a raise.

And now *drum roll*

THE BIG BAD. Hela. She is this combination of deadly (ugh duh goddess of death), jealous and powerful. Not really great for Thor, whose hammer is also destroyed by her. And to top it all off, she is the first born, not him. Ouch. Talk about living a lie. See, Cate Blanchett does a great job of playing this death goddess who revels in destruction and killing, but I think it’s the way that Hela is written that doesn’t really do it for me. She’s just so full of hate and wants to take over the nine realms. She is evil to the core, and so, there’s not much going on besides her being a powerful enemy. Sadly, compared to Loki and other villains, her character falls flat. I mean, even Ultron- who was a robot- had some twisted reasoning to all his evilness. At least she had a dog. I want one. All that aside, Cate Blanchett is still gorgeous and talented and I love her!

Valkyrie. I was impressed with her fighting skills, and even though she was drunk, she still won. Way to go, girl! She also feels a lot like a female Thor to me, and maybe that’s why they’ll end up together? I don’t know, but I think that’s where Marvel’s heading with these two, especially since Thor and Jane broke up. (Ikr! Just like that?! After everything that happened in The Dark World?) Still, in the comics, they did get together at times, so it’s not that surprising if the writers go there.

Surtur. Big, bad fiery dude. And when I say big, I do mean big. He is prophesised to destroy Asgard and bring about Ragnarok, when he grows to be as big as a mountain. See, but I’m not telling you if he succeeds. That, you’ll have to see in the movie.

3. THE BROMANCE IS REAL

The thing I’ve always loved about Thor movies is the relationship between Loki and Thor. It’s so real and raw and funny. They really capture how siblings act irl. At least, that’s how me and my brother are. I just assume most people can relate. I love how Thor has finally, finally learned, that Loki will always try to get the best of him. I also love how Loki will come to his brother’s aid no matter their differences. In the end of the movie, when Thor is sitting in his “throne”, I’m happy to see Loki standing there beside him. And that scene in the room! Where Thor was like “If you were here, I might actually give you a hug” and Loki catches whatever Thor throws at him because he is there! WAHHHH MY FANGIRL HEART

4. THOR’S TRUE POWER

Even though Odin could’ve put it nicely instead of being like “Are you the god of hammers?” (see now, I know where Loki gets all his sass from. It wasn’t spending all that time with Frigga) It’s true that Thor’s power doesn’t come from the hammer. Still, Mjolnir was a character all on it’s own. I’m gonna miss that hammer. My most favourite parts of the movie were when Thor used his powers without the hammer. It was so cool seeing his eyes go all blue and lightning just zapping off his body. His fight scene with the Hulk was e.p.i.c. EPIC. 

He would’ve won if it wasn’t for that cheating Grandmaster! Seriously, dude? And then Thor also zaps Hela with a hella big blast and she flies out the window. DAMN. DAMN BRO. Thor kicks ass without that hammer. I wonder if it’ll be like that in Infinity Wars and what the reactions of his fellow Avengers might be. *insert smirk*

 There were other great parts of the movie- the other gladiators wanting a revolution, Korg (omg Korg, I love him. And the fact that he is voiced by the director makes it even funnier). And the end credits! Goosebumps! I love Thor. I really wish this wasn’t the last movie. But right now, I’m really, reallyyyy looking forward to Infinity Wars.

[delicrieux]

requested by anon <3 prompt;  Do you write for Star Wars ? If so could you do 1 on your prompt list for Kylo Ren with a female reader. If you don't totally understand it's all good. Still love you ❤️ + prompt list a/n: yes i write for star wars and yes kylo is so hot omfg

MASTERLIST KO-FI. WRITTING CHALLENGE!

You always liked Kylo. Always. Perhaps ‘like’ is short of a word for what you felt for him, though love may be just a bit too extreme. That being said, he never liked himself. His self-image in his mind is one of a monster, at least in your regard, one that is not worth the soft taste of your lips. Perhaps it is because of his character. Or maybe it had to do with him feeling so strongly about you. Despite his rough exterior to you he was always gentler – he did not treat you like a delicate flower that would heave and cry at the slightest of wrongdoings, but he was careful to choose his gestures and even more so when it came to words. That led to many prolonged silences that he simply didn’t know how to fill.

But there is a time and place for everything, and when you came to him, open, raw and full of love and intended to confess you didn’t see in your wildest dreams that he would so coldly reject you. It took a while to process. One minute of complete cold silence that could only be masked by the loud breaking of your heart. He refused to look at you – you found it almost insulting how calm and collected he seemed, despite your insides boiling and it clearly showed on your torn face. Then it clicked. His secret fears, the vulnerabilities of affection, the dangers of being attached to someone – you all embodied those to a T. He hardly loved himself…how is he supposed to love you?

You crack a smile though it’s hardly laced with any form of humor or affection, letting your fingers glide the surface of his cold cheek before you cup it, taking a short step closer to Kylo and trying to catch his wandering gaze. “That’s fine.” You say, unsure of what exactly is fine yourself. It is your strange way of testing the waters; of watching his reaction and wondering how exactly you should phrase it. “It’s fine if you don’t see yourself as someone…worth.” You finally catch his eyes and let yourself drift into the very core of his iris where you can see your tiny reflection. “My heart can love for the both of us.”

Requests are open!

[i-sveikata]

Teen Wolf S06E12 liveblog

because of reasons 

what the hell its so bright. teen wolf legit cant get a handle on their lighting for this damn show its either impossible to see or blinding.

ugh theo really? are we supposed to feel sad for this guy because he’s homeless now the fuck. why do they only bring back the boring white guy characters? where’s danny?? where’s kira? where’s literally anyone else but him.

cool man time for spider murder

dude this is clearly a recurring issue. why is nobody calling his parents?? hes literally an underage kid they keep catching sleeping in a car the fuck??? deputies aint doing shit

omg bruh you have clearly never been to australia. why the fuck you let that spider crawl up your arm? thats on you boo

and of course nobody locks the clinic and we need that obligatory shirtless scene to pull the spider out of his body. not creepy at all

ah yes spiders disappear in a puff of smoke all the time. this is natural spider behaviour.

lol why do people think that if they call scott he will answer? when has he ever actually picked up his phone when ppl need him?? boy keeps it on silent i swear.

ahh yes that getting shot up by a bunch of hunters feeling. but guess who isnt going to die? this seemingly immortal white guy, the shock.

oh no scott flashbacks boy, get out, protect yourself

are they trying to imply that scott ran all that way and malia and lydia just caught up with him? was the running part of the flashback? questions

“do you hear that” its death. lets assume its death.

“hunters. run” wow. those hunters sure are convenient showing up when the show needs a new plot device and literally never appearing otherwise. did chris argent frighten them all away?

what scott bby no, thats your besties dad. put down the sheriff friend

oh what do you know they were flashlights all along and not the red laser things for shooting ppl. much joy.

did scott just come out as a werewolf to the rest of the deputies? i support him.

“Whats wrong with his eyes” lol thats the only thing theyre stuck on, not the transformed face or the growling or the body hair? ok.

“Stand down” ye parrish protect scott. is he part of the pack? did we ever have that confirmed or do we just assume.

oh the deputies lowered their weapons and lydia and malia give scott some vaguely ambiguous looks. 

why do they always have such intense music when literally nothing happens?

if theyre about to do a ptsd storyline for scott (which straight up would make so much sense tbh) i stg they better not make fun

scott awkwardly like “You dont think they saw anything do you” “No more than theyre used to” lol beacon hills u have problems.

scott? why you hiding shit from stilinski? tell him about the bullet. 

why does lydia just stand there for that entire scene and say literally nothing like wtf. dazzling banshee statue.

okay they all decided not to tell the sheriff about chris but like why? sheriff isnt the shoot first type. whats the point?

mason getting distracted talking about bretts 8pack is life.

liam picked mason up and literally carried him out of the locker room im screaming.

dodgy counsellor murderer lady is back

sun tzu quotes. art of war and an ominous knife in the table just another day in the college counsellor ladies office.

oh no poor kid murdered by spiders noooooooooooooooooo in his mouth why

eichen house- gross let that place die already. 

parrish “Im not letting you in that place” wtf let her? nah man. hard pass.

trying to hack into chris laptop- is the password gonna be allison dont do this to us you assholes.

you fuckers didnt even let scott write out allisons name before panning away from the laptop jesus

parrish in the bowels of creepy eichen house what the fuck is even going on in this place honestly

dear god quiet girls voice asking for help fuck that shit right off. nope. parrish gotta flash the eyes for that access because apparently everybody knows about the supernatural in beacon hills now. not a far stretch tbh.

lol doctor locked him in. solidarity.

oh hey i think i saw corey for two seconds. not sure. is theo playing lacrosse with them??? idk. does he even attend school anymore?

is that meant to be brett who body checked him? legit cant even see ppl behind the lacrosse helmets.

i swear they just trying to establish a story line for liam in case they can come back with another show. but like he aint that interesting sorry.

why is it just destroy goalie corey now? hes doing his best. trying to stay visible.

counsellor lady looking at brett. newest victim?? brett trying to help liam get control ayeee werewolf pals.

the fuck parrish. how is the population of beacon hills not constantly dropping with all these body piles that keep showing up everywhere.

haha nurse dude who locked him in was evil, were they trying to surprise us with that?

yet another liam rage moment. somebody help this kid chill out for five seconds.

chris making deals, finding out ppl buying guns from him are fake army dudes what a ride. wheres his backup? 

“I had a guy on the inside” “who” “youre standing on him” lol malia and scott arrive to fuck it up again.

huh a massive shoot out where nobody got shot and the bad guy got away. nice.

“You dont have a cell in here that can hold me” damn parrish sounding tough and shit before he becomes a popsicle.

did they honestly just bring brett back so the new counsellor lady could kill him. harsh

lydia up to her banshee shit again. save parrish.

“I havent stamped a bullet since allison died” dear god rip my heart out.

how did it take them literally that long to find the dead kid who got eaten by spiders in the locker room? like was he just lying there all day and nobody noticed.

lol lydia went to eichen house and didnt tell anybody she was going there. smart move. much good plan.

bruh this nurse guy gonna kill parrish. what is lydia even doing rn?

jesus everybody be having flash backs for when they were tortured at some point in the past. poor girl be having a panic attack.

OMFG THEY DID IT AGAIN DAMMIT. WHY DOES EVERY FEMALE CHARACTER HAVE TO HAVE A FREAK OUT BEFORE SHE HAS AN EMPOWERING MOMENT GODDAMN.

like literally they go all terrified and crying before their expression gets intense and powerful like seriously? girls dont all react the same way you cowards.

wow actually having a moment where scott admits he got freaked out. cant remember the last time that happened. oh hey and here comes the malia x scott scenes. how is this not weird?

has literally everybody hooked up on this show now at some point?

hahah chris turns up with a laser sight thing on his gun. very appropriate. not traumatising at all.

aww scotts little smile after he looked at malia was kinda sweet. 

omg the way they flinched when chris raised his gun- these poor fucking kids man. cant catch a break

oh god when young pack gang find the spider kid decidedly not dead and they say they tried to call him and he checks his phone and is like “huh musta died” THATS A TERRIBLE PUN. VERY BAD.

wooo they figured out its an inexperienced hunter killing ppl. also where did brett go? are we just assuming hes alive because he got away idk?

im liking the little pack powows in scotts kitchen. simpler times.

it all comes down to fear. “What are they afraid of?” “....us” DUN DUN

hold up counsellor lady got scratched? she a werewolf now???? omg lol brett jumping out of trees to attack counsellors who tried to kill him.

gets shot by an arrow for his efforts. flees into the night. noice.

ugh gerard. bruh. you need to die. lets not take the counsellor lady under your wing. beacon hills is running out of bodies to make piles out of as it is. 

[liarbelacqua]

Tagged by @betelxeuse and @auroralynne ♥ Rules: Tag 20 amazing followers you’d like to get to know better 

Name: Rachel Nickname: Rachie Gender: female Star Sign: cancer Height: 5′4" Sexual Orientation: bi! Hogwarts House: Hufflepuff! Favorite color: pastels!! roses and periwinkles and pale yellows and oranges and pale blues and lavenders and spring green !! ♥ Average hours of sleep: 5 -7 depending on what I've got going on that week!! Weeks where I'm working on chapters or intense school assignments I probably get 5 - 6. When I take writing breaks and/or finish school work I usually get 7 and (sometimes!! if I'm lucky!!) 8, but my dog likes to wake me up at 7 AM regardless of what time I went to sleep lmao I slept in past 10 AM once in the past like 3 years and I felt like i was hit by an entire train when I woke up so I try not to do that Cat or Dog Person: DOG ♥ I've always had dogs (grew up with boxers, then mastiffs, then when I moved out on my own I got a pyrenees) so I can't imagine life without a big goofy dog in it. I think cats are adorable but because I never had any experience with them I have no idea how to interact with them and a lot don't appreciate getting pet the same way I'd pet a dog :'( need 'how to show a cat you love it the right way' lessons. Favorite Fictional Characters: All time favorite HANDS DOWN is James Wilson from House M.D. No matter how many fictional characters I add to my list of favorites I have such a soft spot for him. I love him so much ♥ My fave ladies are Ginny Weasley and Clara Oswald and Arya Stark. I LOVE Abraham Kenyatta from the TV show 'Zoo' (I just finished season 2 yesterday omfg it's so damn good...also adored chloe tousignant). I've got a soft spot for Rudy Wade from Misfits despite what an ass he can be lmao. and obviously harry potter is my first born son. scorpius is a precious baby. RORY WILLIAMS i can't believe I almost forgot about him!! The truth is, I love so many characters omg it's really really rare that I find any main characters I don't like as I think they've all got things worth loving in them. GILES I almost forgot giles!! Also Giles (oh and Willow!!) from Buffy ♥ AND SAYID JARRAH from lost (before they did him so wrong in the last few seasons :|) Number of blankets I sleep with: down blanket and a heating blanket in the winter, down blanket and a quilt in the summer. I don't live anywhere cold (actually live in the south where it's inhumanely hot) but I'm weird and get really cold really easily Favorite singer/band: Gotta steal one of Fátima's answers: "Florence Welch could punch me in the face and I’d still water her crops, cook her dinner and give her my money" SAME 500%. In addition to Holy Queen Flo: wet, a fine frenzy, sara bareilles, daughter, rachael yamagata, rilo kiley, dixie chicks, marina and the diamonds, gavin james, lana del rey, I've got a weird soft spot for certain country music albums just bc I grew up listening to them so no matter how trashy the country music genre becomes you'll always catch me jamming to some of kenny chesney and toby keith's earliest albums, god so many more I can't even think of them all tbh Dream trip: I'd love to go to London again!! What I've always wanted to do so much though is buy an RV and go across the entire US because there are so many states I haven't seen yet (and my dog loves car rides and walks so he would have a BLAST with his life being one big car ride and walk LMAO I also really really want to see the Grand Canyon). And I REALLY want to visit Canada. Dream job: DREAM job: Writer that can actually support themselves by just writing / slightly more realistic dream job: I'd love to open my own daycare or even a holistic pet shop / most realistic job that would probably not bankrupt my already broke ass and is what I'm 97% doing: teaching middle/high school language arts When Was The Blog Created: 2010

I tag (I know it's over 20 but I follow so many lovely people and there are still more i wish I could've added omg): @cazdraws @lindseyanna @nomoresympathy @hope-wish-anddream @fullhouseofcards @that-one-story @ginnyupdates @maresdotes @pattyesque @aekaskey @formigathewarrior @inekepp @accio-hogwarts-a-history @halfbloodwitch @erisedsubrocs @my-name-is-lasagna @adxmbirkholtz @unnecessaryjames @pottermanor @thegirlwiththegoldenscarf @broomsticksandflyingcars @the-chumblies @i-fucking-love-dragons  

[spectrumscribe]

I live commented on the latest (and very leaked) episode of TMNT and this was the result.

Spoilers below, obviously speaking. Avoid if you don’t want to see this shit before you see the actual episode of Owari.

Not much of a break down or analysis of the episode, just me being salty about a lot of things.

----------------------------

Finally he’s fucking dead

Why did they bury him don’t they cremate folks in japan

Oh fuck no he’s still alive

Wait no he’s a ghost, fucking great.

Oh real helpful advice splinter thank you

No he’s not the fucking sensei he’s their idiot older brother don’t tell him he has more power than he does

Oh oh he’s leaving

Fucking bye splinter, real useful advice as always.

Now the hospital scene. God. Karai I’m sorry your life sucks you didn’t deserve this.

Oh hey they mentioned Casey has an actual family. Whoa. It’s only been like two three seasons since they did.

Ew hand holding

Ew touchy hand holding

Nice a montage scene

Casey you disaster I love you, I can’t believe he did that to shredder’s mask. Oh wait yes I can he’s Casey.

Okay everyone looks like they’ve been listening to too much MCR and I can’t tell if I hate it or love it.

At least April is untouched.

Kay I have to admit, the sneaky black look when they’re in the actual dark is p cool.

Also April killin it as always. Thank you for that nick.

Y’all have been at this for like three years stop tempting fate and saying the Thing every time you get a break.

Real strategic guys, go straight for the cliff. Nice.

Aw shit its Xever. Finally someone who knows what they’re doing at least most of the time.

Apparently Raph leveled up since the last time he fought Xever. Nice.

Whoa cold, leaving him to suffocate. I like.

I can’t believe it only took a whole four seasons to get the kids on board with the murder plan.

Yo what the retromutagen is back?? Where the shit has it been all this time.

Omg the reason stockman has been a fly all this time is because he liked it. He actually liked it. Wonders never cease.

“Michael” omfg

“Michael” I can’t get over that. That’s almost as strange as Mikey saying “papa” out of nowhere.

At least bebop and rocksteady don’t forget Casey and April like the plot often does. Thanks guys.

Oh hell yes some Donnie ninja action for the first time in forever. Donnie hurry Casey is about to die and you’re not the one to do it.

Wow I can’t believe they finally remembered the shit Donnie can do when used correctly. Beautiful.

OH SHIT ROBOT ARM NICE

“-all of your hands,” nice

Ooh clockwork hands are nifty. Loving the steampunk.

Okay so April can take a full on punch from tigerclaw but not one slash from shredder on the arm, like what??? Continuity, people, please.

And Leo continues to have bad catch phrases in battle. Bring this back more often thanks.

OH SHIT MORE TIGERS

YES

Bruh wait has tigerclaw been chillin with a bunch of actual tigers

This seems like furry shit

I’m calling it he’s a cat fucker

MOLOTOV COCKTAIL THE NINJA EDITION YEEEAAAAH

Oh and we conveniently leave the humans behind. nice.

Showdown. Fuck yeah.

A family that murders together stays together. Kill a bitch, boys.

Actually working together in battle, nice nice. Everyone’s getting their shots in, I’m loving it.

OH FUCK IS IT GONNA BE DEE?

no of course not, who am i kidding why would they let him do anything cool in this hell show.

Retromutagen time. Oh no it doesn’t fucking work, of course it didn’t work.

DEE NO

Oh nvm his boyfriend and girlfriend saved him.

But shit he can’t get back up. Convenient.

YES MIKEY GO BEAT HIS ASS

NO DON’T

FUCK- well there he goes too. Bye Mikey, RIP.

The first they show of how scary he is in seasons and he’s thrown off a building. Ugh.

And there goes Raph too. At least he smashed shredder’s head against shit before then.

Oh shut up Leo shredhead obvs gives no shits anymore. Don’t try guilting him now.

HA HIS ARM

FUCKING

WOW JUST LIKE KARAI NOW YOU CAN BE TWINSIES

Rat dad no this is not the time for a vision

“Fear nothing” um excuse me that’s not helpful here

Wtf why was Leo’s sword able to defeat shredder but not fucking Karai’s, who had a direct shot at his stupid radioactive heart

I call bullshit

BULLSHIT

also

OH FUCK ITS HIS HEAD

Wait no it’s not a head. I thought it was a head.

The end- oh wait no more hetero

“-what no one else could,” like you?? Why is she just letting this go? Karai don’t let it go. You wanted the bastard dead and you didn’t get to do it yourself why are you not mad.

What happened to Leo’s broken arm. Did he healing hand it when no one was looking and not share that with Karai. Wtf.

Well that was a horrendously out of character moment from Raph. Thanks nick.

Everyone emerges from the shadows to cockblock Leo, bless.

Why are you all out in the middle of daylight holy fuck

Guys get underground it’s like noon or something

“Right, sensei?” guys Leo’s talking to thin air you should do something about that

And we pan out with a watermark in the sky of splinter. Real classy.

Okay but

WHERE IS SHINI

HELL WHERE IS EVERYBODY

Guys you had like, an armada of friends who are basically tanks why didn’t you use them to defeat shredder.

Wtf

-------------------

Okay so all in all- yikes.

Ignoring some continuity errors, it just felt… kind of really rushed? Also a bit forced in specific areas.

The whole “Leo defeats the big bad” thing is really bothering me. This was a family fight. The whole family. That should have been the brothers all together, their friends who are basically their extended family now, and Karai maybe?? Since she’s actually related to and very deeply involved in this mess??

But nope. Lone Wolf Leo strikes again. As per fucking usual. I don’t know how they’re expecting Leo to lead the team, honestly. His skills on teamwork need some serious polishing. (The whole “you are their father and master now” thing with splinter last ep is still seriously bothering me. Like…. Eugh.)

Definitely not a fan of how things worked out. We barely saw the other brothers do much of anything, Karai was flipping bed ridden- I swear she wasn’t that injured in the last episode, I’m calling bull- and Casey and April were utterly exiled from the final showdown.

Nvm that the Mutanimals- who lost their only safe refuge and literal home in all this- weren’t even mentioned. Also Shini. Where did that beautiful murder lady get off to? She was fine in the last ep, why didn’t she show up and shank shredder for her wonderful senpai?

And the retromutagen. Seriously, that’s been completely ignored for over a season, and it suddenly shows up again. There’s been a number of innocent mutants come and gone who could have used that stuff. Feels weird that the boys never even offered them the chance at humanity again. (Karai too, have they even told her it exists?? Though I doubt she’d take that offer, it’d still be nice if they at least told her she has the choice.)

((What is it with this show and taking choices away from characters? More specifically the female ones.))

At least we got an explanation why stockman was still a fly. Wow is he a weirdo. Gotta love him for it though.

So yeah, lots of dropped points here. Important points. Would have been nice to actually mention a few of them, even just in passing.

Over all I didn’t feel much emotion or gravity from the episode. Mostly just salt. I’ll bet people will be crying all over the place about what happened in this thing and I’ll just be sitting here feeling nothing but sodium powered emotion.

I’m still kind of really laughing over the whole MCR look though. I can’t wait to see all the angsty AMV’s that come from this, it’ll be fucking hilarious.

[geekade]

Back to Hogwarts - Part the Sixth

Welcome back to Hogwarts, wizards, witches, and muggles alike. You know you’ve read a heavy book when you get to the next one in the series and think, “Only 650 pages? Thank God, a short one!” The first half of the sixth book brings a lot of setup for the all out war in the seventh book and a heaping dose of raging teenage hormones, about which I have some thoughts. Also, Albus Dumbledore remains a mother-effing boss. Let’s swoop on into it, shall we?

I thought the opening conversation between Scrimgeour and the Prime Minister was a nice way to acknowledge that events in the wizarding world have an effect on those in the Muggle world. We don’t need to spend all day on it, but it is nice of Rowling to let us know she did think about that part of the story. It also serves to explain how big a deal Voldemort’s return to power is, as it necessitates a rare interaction between these two. Another way she shows this awareness of the larger world is in Arthur Weasley’s promotion. Wizards taking advantage of the situation to turn a selfish profit is another very realistic detail. To borrow from another fandom, as the Doctor once said “When you find something brand new in the world, what’s the next thing you look for?...A profit.” I was also pleased to see the positive flip side of this idea in Fred and George selling actually useful protection magic. Who would have known at the beginning of Sorcerer's Stone that Percy would turn out to be the disappointing Weasley son and Fred and George would grow up to make their parents proud?

Obviously Snape is a central figure in this book. Reading this book with foreknowledge of coming events makes him so much a more impressive character. Just imagine the conversation that had to have happened between he and Dumbledore in anticipation of Snape’s conversation with Narcissa Malfoy and Bellatrix at his home in Spinner’s End. It makes it so much more intense and when you put yourself in his shoes, you have to love Snape. He is impressively sneaky and it’s amazing how well his cover stands up under Bellatrix’s scrutiny. And when you get to his encounter with Draco the fuckboi during Slughorn’s Christmas party, you have to have some sympathy for Snape. He has to put up with so much of Malfoy’s bullshit to maintain his cover for the Order. His frustration is palpable. And then there’s the true identity of the Half-Blood Prince. It makes you look at the book in a whole new way when you wonder how Harry would react if he knew who the Prince was from the jump. And then when you consider Snape’s true motivations, it gives you yet another way to look at the book, wondering how Harry would feel if he knew about all that as well. Impressively complex, well played Rowling.

When we first encounter the pairing of Harry and Dumbledore, Harry’s refusal to believe Dumbledore is really coming to get him is a good way to establish his lack of trust. Dumbledore’s understanding about his feelings makes an excellent beginning at attempting to regain it. I also appreciate Harry’s nerves at encountering a respected figure outside of his usual context. It’s a very coming-of-age moment. Once we get to Slughorn’s, we get to see how clever Dumbledore is, knowing he couldn’t convince Slughorn to come to Hogwarts but that the opportunity to teach Harry would be too tempting to resist. He is a smooth mofo and it’s kind of amazing to me that no one in the entire wizarding world has yet caught onto him completely.

As we begin his private lessons with Harry, I love Dumbledore’s honesty about his assumptions when history cannot be confirmed by facts. It’s the kind of openness he should have had with Harry the whole time, but as a parent, I can understand how it’s hard to fine-tune that distinction of how much detail kids are able to comprehend at what level. In retrospect, Dumbledore should have erred in the opposite direction, but it’s easy to understand why he did what he did. But it makes one wonder how the story would have turned out if Dumbledore had been open with Harry from the jump. I’m undecided on how I feel about the use of Pensieve as an exposition tool during the lessons. By this point in the series, it starts to feel a little overused, but I’m hard pressed to think of another way to get so much necessary information about past events to the readers & characters effectively. Dumbledore is right to share these memories, even if Harry is too naive to understand why they are so important (though Hermione is not, because she’s amazing), so I guess in the end I have to give it a pass. 

The other major figure that plays a role in this book is everyone’s hormones. It starts to ramp up at Quidditch tryouts, when Hermione equates Ron’s happiness about being on the team with preserving the safety of the entire school in terms of reasons to break the rules about what you can use magic for. Around this point, I began compiling a list of alternate titles for this book.

Harry Potter and OMG Raging Hormones Everywhere

Harry Potter and Do I Have to Smack Every Single Teenager (Except Ginny) in the Head?!

Harry Potter and OMFG, You Fucking Idiots

Harry Potter and JUST KISS ALREADY. NO, NOT HER!

Harry Potter and Teenagers Who are Stupid and Mean To People They Like

Harry Potter and If You Just Thought About It For a Second, You’d Realize You Both Like Each Other and If You Cut the Crap You’d Get Together a Full Book Sooner

Harry Potter and My Regrets About How I Handled Myself With Boys During My Adolescence

Harry Potter and The Realistic Depiction of Hormonal Teen Behavior That Still Might Have Been Better If Handled In Another Way

Most of the crap that gets pulled in the name of hormones in this book gets a pass, but there’s one particular incident that bugs. Hermione invites McLaggen to the Slugworth’s Christmas party to make Ron jealous. It’s not the most admirable behavior, but she’s a vulnerable, insecure teenage girl, not an idol of perfection, so fine. However at the party, she ducks McLaggen and here’s where I have a problem. When Harry finds her, her appearance is described as disheveled and we learn that all McLaggen wants to do is talk Quidditch and make out. She then spots him looking for her and proceeds to run and hide. Girl, NO. You are Hermione FUCKING Granger and you do not put up with unwanted sexual advances. Tell him in no uncertain terms that is not OK, jinx the FUCK out of him if he tries anything else, and MOVE ON with your day. Doing otherwise is uncharacteristic of her, a betrayal of an awesome character, and irresponsible of Rowling. I see myself in her reaction and wish I’d had an example of saying no to look to when I encountered situations like that in my youth.

While Hermione’s character suffers some minor damage, this book is where Ginny really comes into her own. Reflecting back to her first appearance, her development from tiny scared girl to badass self-assured young woman is totally natural and wonderful. I love that she dates other boys instead of just pining away for Harry when he’s not aware of or interested in her. Harry’s jealousy upon seeing her involved in the Slug Club is subtle and well done. It’s clear she’s been watching Hermione when they team up to scold Harry about taking direction from mysterious handwriting in a book (and also really nice for both of them to have that sort of sisterly friendship, since neither really has any other female peers to relate to). Her awesomely empowered response to Ron’s bungled attempt at being a protective older brother when he catches her with Dean is the only thing about the whole hormonal debacle that is not dumb (though she might have been kinder to Ron). I loved Ginny before, but I never quite realized how awesome she is until this point in this reread. It’s also worth noting that, knowing what’s coming, Harry trying to control his feelings about Ginny is kind of hilarious.

Anger aside, the nonsense with the hormones is well placed, because it’s immediately followed by Harry secretly observing the apparent scheming of Draco and Snape. Shit is officially about to Get. Real. and Harry and Co. have dropped the ball in getting distracted by girls, boys, and quidditch. We get a nice balance of comedic distraction and dramatic importance and this scene serves as the wake-up call. We all know what’s coming by the end of this book, so hold onto your butts and join me next month for the exciting, sad conclusion.