#OOF all that to say woof

[nat-20s]

good luck talking with your dad! I hope it goes well but if it doesn’t, at least you were brave enough to speak up and lay things out. You can be at peace with the fact that YOU tried. anons cheering you on (:

Thank you for your support :'). I don't know exactly when he'll be coming home so that's gonna be a fun little sword of damacles over my head but I really and genuinely hoping that it goes okay. And if it doesn't um. I don't know. The thing is I really WANT to have a good relationship with my dad I don't WANT to be on the path towards estrangement I WANT us to be able to like. hang out you know. And I'm not gonna present an ultimatum in this conversation but like. If tonight goes poorly I don't really know what to do except fully start to pull away. I can't really spend that much time being around someone who's worry can manifest as being shitty and kind of mean to me you know?

[noctumbra]

                      𝒗𝒊. 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒚𝒔

🍂 summary ─ heroic moves such as feeding stray cats in this cold require rewards, in your opinion.

🍂 pairing ─ farmer!bucky barnes x reader

🍂 warnings ─ fluff, animal lover bucky, he’s a cat dad ok, soft!bucky, pet names

🍂 a/n ─ i said it before ik but i’m saying it again: i want a bucky *cries*

You were walking quickly through the park when you saw a familiar man-bun supporting, knitted sweater wearing guy kneeling near a bench and feeding the stray dogs and cats, petting them as they rubbed their tails or faces against his pants.

He had the biggest smile on his face, all bright and genuine. You could see his lips moving as he murmured softly to the animals, giving them the pets they demand so fiercely all the while making sure they had enough food and water to keep them full at least for some time. You sighed as you watched him from a distance.

He looked so good, but also so messy because of all the dirt those cute creatures brought with themselves. His tote bag, the one that was identical to the one you were carrying at the moment, was on the ground, carelessly dropped from the way it looked. You also saw the discarded gloves and the beanie on top of the bag; you assumed one of the dogs recognized him and got excited, jumping all over him and making him lose his balance.

Your cheeks hurt from smiling widely, but you didn’t care. Bucky was able to put that smile on your face just by existing and doing whatever he usually did on his off day. Biting your lip, you stepped forward a bit, getting closer.

“…Hi, pretty, hi, hi, hi,” he was babbling at a dog which was a little older than a puppy. Its tail was wagging madly as it let itself loved thoroughly by him. “Did you fall into a mud pool, buddy? Lookit all the mess you have on you─ oof!” He fell backwards as two more dogs, which were totally puppies this time, jumped on him with a small ‘woof’ of their own. You chuckled silently.

Leaving Bucky to make love to the animals, you walked into the coffee shop with a smile on your face. Wanda raised a brow. You just smiled wider.

“Both of you are cute as hell but also dumb as fuck,” she grumbled. You giggled and shrugged. Wanda rolled her eyes. “What can I getcha?” You hummed. Your eyes found Bucky who was now petting a fat cat while giving scritches to the other.

“What does he usually get?” You asked her. She narrowed her eyes.

“Either a vanilla latte or a chai tea latte,” she answered anyway. “He likes aromas and syrups.” You hummed again. Just when you opened your mouth, he walked in.

He was covered in dirt and mud and God knows what else, but he looked so happy that it didn’t matter that he was filthy. He had this huge grin on his face, his pretty eyes were shining with utter happiness and his cheeks were red because of the cold and all of those good feelings, you guessed.

He murmured a ‘hi’ to Pietro and dropped his bag on an empty table, and then promptly walked towards the bathroom. You smiled at the idea that came to your mind.

“Two vanilla lattes,” you said. “Grande. Less the foam, the better the taste, amirite?” You joked. Wanda chuckled and rolled her eyes. “Um, and a pumpkin muffin, please.” Wanda grinned.

“How many servings?” She asked slyly. It was your time to roll your eyes.

“One,” you told her. “For him.” Wanda let out a soft ‘aww’ as she scribbled the order and slid the cups to Pietro. You quickly paid, grabbed the tray that contained the muffin from her and moved towards the end to take the cups. Pietro winked at you.

“Good luck,” he said with a shit-eating grin. You grumbled and left without saying anything to him. You heard him chuckle.

You placed one latte and the muffin tray on his table, rapidly depositing yours on the table next to his, and pulled out a small notepad that you always carried around in your bag. You wrote your note, placed it under his cup and grabbed your things. Sadly, you didn’t have the time to sit around in your coffee shop, but you were glad that you ran into that cute scene when you did. Giggling excitedly to yourself, you made your way towards the exit and pushed the opened at the same time Bucky came back from the bathroom, looking way more put together and clean.

“Hey, Wanda,” he greeted. She smiled knowingly at him. “Can I get─”

“Your order has already been taken,” Wanda said, pointing the table with his bag laying on top. Bucky frowned and looked where she was pointing.

He saw a big cup of coffee and a muffin sitting next to his bag innocently.

“Who?” Wanda shrugged but didn’t say anything. Bucky’s frown deepened as he narrowed his eyes at her. He walked back to his table and saw a purple-colored notepad page winking at him. He grabbed it.

“You looked cold while being an angel for those sweet, little creatures, and I thought you could use something to warm you right up. Sadly, I had to leave, but maybe next time I’ll join you. Thank you for being a hero to those animals, God knows they need one.

Oh, love you bag by the way, where is it from?

Oh, vol 2., your sweater looks amazing on you.

Yours truly, Y/N ─the girl you annotated her book.”

And Bucky was─

He sat back on the chair with butterflies in his tummy, his cheeks warm and his insides feeling all mushy. He gently placed the note somewhere safe on the table where he could still see it. He grabbed his coffee and took a sip, enjoying the warmth it spread throughout his body. Then, he took a small bite from his muffin and moaned softly at the taste.

And Bucky was─

It was the best coffee and muffin he ever had. There was something different in it, Bucky knew that. Something that there never was before. Bucky smiled into his coffee cup. He knew exactly what it was.

And Bucky was in love.

[all-the-things-2020]

Late Night Talking - Chapter Ten

Summary: The aftermath of the movie premiere.

Word Count: 3150+

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: mentions of parent death, issues with body image

Tag list: @rhoorl @avastrasposts @readingiskeepingmegoing @runningmom94 @gwendibleywrites

We slept late the next morning. It was after nine when I crawled out of bed to use the bathroom. Dieter was still passed out cold, lying face down with his face crammed into a pillow, his bare ass poking out from under the covers. I took a look at myself in the mirror and wished I hadn’t. My hair was sticking up in all directions and there were bags under my eyes. It was a far cry from my red carpet look.

I decided to take a shower and start over with my hair, rather than try to tame it the way it was. When I got out, I slipped into a pair of leggings and a t-shirt, deciding to forgo a bra, at least for the time being. It was going to be a lazy day, after all.

Dieter was still asleep. I leaned over the bed to cover him up and he grunted. “Why are you so obsessed with my butt?,” he mumbled.

”I’m not obsessed with your butt,” I told him. “I just didn’t want it to catch cold.” I tucked the comforter around him and patted his bottom. “Go back to sleep, Deet. You’ve earned it.”

”What time?”

”Doesn’t matter. Go to sleep.”

He didn’t argue with me. I knew the press junket had been stressful and tiring. He deserved to get some rest. 

I found my purse in the living room and pulled out my phone. I’d managed to remember to turn it off last night, so the battery was still at 65% when I powered it on. All my apps were lit up with notifications, but I went first to my texts. 

SAM: You look GORGEOUS!!!!

ME: Aw, thanks. It’s all thanks to the stylists. Did my hair and makeup and everything. Felt like a giant Barbie doll. LOL

It was close to midday back East, so I knew she was probably at work and wouldn’t respond right away, so I jumped over to Instagram. I followed the studio’s page and I knew they would have posted photos from last night. 

There were several pics from the red carpet, including one of me and Dieter. It was weird seeing myself all glammed up, standing beside him as he posed effortlessly for the camera. I could see that I was a bit stiff and awkward, despite the elegant dress and high heels. Still, I looked nice. Not bad for a first time, I thought. Then I started reading the comments.

She’s OLD.

Come on, girl, at least dye that gray hair. Woof.

Thought Bravo had better taste than that. 

Def a publicity stunt. Prob trying to hide that he’s gay AF.

If they think we’ll fall for that, he needs a new publicist. Lots of actresses they could have hired to help his image. Barf.

I think she looks nice. For a middle aged woman. 

There were positive comments, of course, many of them, but my eye went right to the negative ones. After all, most of the positive comments were simple heart emojis or “they look so cute” or other generic messages. The negative ones were more pointed.

I closed Instagram. Twitter would be even worse — there were so many trolls on there that I hardly ever posted anything anymore. Maybe tumblr would be kinder. I was wrong.

There were several posts under the hashtag “dieter bravo” that displayed one of the Getty photos from the night before and had commentary along the lines of “I’m glad he’s so happy” and “Aww, they made it red carpet official” but there was also lots that claimed to be insanely jealous of me for being beside him.

Oof, not to be that girl, but I could pull off a red carpet look better than that, just saying.

Not sure what he sees in her, but you do you, Dieter.

He looks AMAZING as always. Wish she’d worn something better.

She looks like she doesn’t want to be there. I’m sure it’s overwhelming and all but at least look happy to be next to him. I’d kill to be on the red carpet with him.

Ugh, I hate her, lol. Seriously, does anyone else think he’ll be back on the market soon? She is so not his type. Dieter fucking Bravo is a party boi.

I could feel tears stinging at the back of my eyes. It was silly — I knew they were making the comments out of jealousy or sheer assholery — but it was like being teased or excluded on the playground in elementary school. It still hurt.

Fortunately, my phone pinged with an incoming text.

SAM: Those stylists couldn’t have done it without something amazing to start with — YOU! I am so proud of you, chickie! You rocked that red carpet. And Dieter 🥵Don’t know how you manage to survive around him without spontaneously combusting. Dude is HOT.

ME: You don’t know how badly I needed that, chickie! Been looking at comments on social and people are brutal.

SAM: Fuck them. I’ve been bragging on you all day. Everyone thinks you look fabulous. Trolls gonna troll.

I smiled. Leave it to Sam to cheer me up. Then another text came in, this time from Simone.

SIMONE: Girl! You were on fire 🔥 last night. Your pic is all over campus. Kids are all planning to go see the movie with Miss Emily’s boyfriend this weekend. Eileen had such a sourpuss when I saw her, lol. 

ME: Thanks! Been seeing some haters online so glad the kiddos got my back. And I’m ROTFL over Eileen 🤣

SIMONE: One of my kids was IRATE over some of the stuff people were saying about you. She was going OFF! I didn’t even know she knew where the library was, lol. If a 15yo can see through their b.s., so can you.

“Hey.” Dieter came stumbling out of the bedroom with his hair sticking straight up and one hand in his boxer shorts scratching his ass. If only the fans could see him now!

”Hey yourself,” I said. “You need coffee?”

He nodded as he shuffled toward the kitchen island. “I got it,” he said. “You looking at photos from last night?”

”I was, but people are mean. Then I got a couple of texts that cheered me up.”

”People are fucking assholes online,” he said as he dumped water and coffee grounds into the machine. He slopped water onto the counter but didn’t wipe it up. He was messier than usual when he was only half awake. “First thing Carmen told me when she signed on was never read the comments.”

While the coffee was brewing, he fished his phone out of his pants, which were draped over one of the dining room chairs. He slumped onto a stool at the island and started swiping. “You looked so good last night,” he said. Then he yawned and scratched his head. “Anyone who says different has their head up their own ass or is just jealous. Or both.” 

The scent of coffee wafted through the air and a shaft of sunlight lanced through a gap in the vertical blinds. The kitchen was illuminated with golden light and Dieter’s hair became a halo of fire around his head, just for a second. Who gives a fuck what Prissy McDickface on Instragram thinks? I’m the one here with Dieter, watching him smile at pictures of us while he’s waiting for his coffee. And if Dieter could smile before his first infusion of caffeine of the day, I knew he was truly happy. Because of me.

*******************************************

The movie was a hit. It was number one at the box office that weekend, and Dieter spent most of Saturday afternoon fielding phone calls and texts from Carmen and his agent. He looked every inch a Hollywood star as he sat on a lounge chair beside the pool with his Ray-Ban sunglasses on and his phone up to his ear. 

“Yeah, set it up,” he said. “Can’t hurt to meet with them.” He looked at me over the tops of his shades and winked.

”Shit, I can’t believe all this,” he said when he’d hung up. “Carmen has ten journalists lined up to interview me. And half of them are from legit outlets, not just bloggers.” He laughed. “Who knew a twenty minute part would get so much attention?”

We had skimmed some of the reviews online and most of them had been positive. Many of them mentioned Dieter’s performance as one of the highlights of the film; several had used the phrase “Bravo’s back.”  

“And David has two meetings booked with producers this week,” Dieter continued. “I don’t want to get ahead of myself but this might be the thing to get the ball rolling again.”

“I hope so,” I said. I knew that Dieter really wanted to get back to the level he’d enjoyed earlier in his career, where he was taken seriously as an actor. He’d taken just about any part the last few years, just to keep the money flowing but while movies like Cliff Beasts might be popular with fans they weren’t taken seriously by critics. And he admitted he’d been phoning it in before he’d gone to rehab. This film was the first project he’d worked on since and apparently he’s done a very good job. 

“Just don’t get too famous and forget about the little people like me,” I added.

“I will never forget about you,” he said seriously. “And you are definitely not one of the ‘little people’ in my life. You’re huge, baby.”

“Yeah, that’s what some of the trolls online are saying,” I joked.

“Fuck them. I’ve been with skinny women and it’s like hugging a skeleton. You’re real, Em. Nothing fake about you. Which is one of the many, many reasons that I love you.”

******************************************

We had finally finished off the leftover Chinese food, so we decided to go out for dinner Saturday night. Nothing fancy, just a little hole in the wall Mexican place that Dieter was fond of, and not just because the food was good. The owners were very protective of his privacy and didn’t laugh at his clumsy attempts at Spanish. His father’s parents had been born in Ecuador, and he still had some distant cousins in South America, but Dieter and his family had only ever spoke English.

”My dad can get by pretty well,” he’d explained to me once. “He does business with one of his cousins who lives in Buenos Aires, and he sometimes visits his aunt in Santiago, but Freddy and I never learned. Hell, I took French in high school just to fuck with everyone. Freddy took German, of course.”

Although they’d come from Ecuador, Dieter’s grandparents were descended from German and Italian immigrants. “My dad’s grandpa Antonio Bravo married one of the Diefenbach girls,” Dieter had explained. “Huge Romeo and Juliet vibes there. The two families were rivals in the button business.”

My own skill in Spanish was limited to the Spanglish I’d picked up by osmosis from living in Southern California (like Dieter, I’d take French in school, because I thought it sounded fancy). But everyone at Ramon’s was friendly and very patient with our attempts to do more than just ask for what was on the menu.

”Buenos noches,” our waiter said as we sat down at our table, tucked away in the back. ”El jefe said you get free margaritas because the movie is doing so well.”

”Gracias,” said Dieter. “Um, dos platos de empanadas, por favor. Y los margaritas.”

”Muy bien! And my sister in law saw the movie last night. She said tell you she really liked it if I saw you.”

”Tell her thanks, man,” Dieter had exhausted his capacity for Spanish already. He was still running on fumes from the press junket. I could see it in his eyes.

After a delicious dinner of empanadas and enchiladas — not to mention two extremely generous margaritas — we went back to Dieter’s place and collapsed on the couch.

”If I went there too often, I’d gain thirty pounds,” Dieter said, unbuttoning his pants. 

“The food is amazing,” I agreed, glad I was wearing stretchy pants. “You want to put a movie on before we succumb to the food coma?”

”You read my mind.” He grabbed the remote off the coffee table. We were only about twenty minutes into Jurassic Park when I felt his head slump onto my shoulder. He was out. I maneuvered him into a more comfortable position so he wouldn’t wake up with a stiff neck. I never saw the end of the movie. I was tired, too.

**************************************************************

We lay in bed, both of us wide awake at two a.m. after our nap on the couch. “Whatcha thinking about?” Dieter asked, his hand idly playing with my hair.

”Not much. Just feeling cozy. How about you?”

”I’m thinking how I could get used to this,” he said. “Dinner, falling asleep on the couch, lying in bed talking about stuff … I wish you didn’t have to go back home tomorrow.” He kissed my forehead. “You know you can move in any time you want.”

”It’s tempting but it would be a hell of a commute.” 

“Quit your job. Get a new one. There are plenty of schools. You’d still be in the same union, right? Still get your pension?”

I rolled onto my back. “Deet, it’s not that easy. There aren’t all that many school library positions out there and they pay well enough that people don’t leave. Or they’re part-time at elementary schools. And other positions … yeah, I could do other stuff, but your retirement is based off of your final two years salary. If I took a pay cut, I’d get less so I’d have to work longer.”

“Jeez, you sound like my dad and Freddy. ‘Be practical, Deiter. Plan ahead, Dieter. Invest wisely, Dieter’,” he grumbled.

”I have to be,” I said. “I only have myself to rely on. You know my parents didn’t leave me anything.”

Dieter sighed. “You aren’t alone, Em. You have me.”

”For now,” I said. “I want to believe this is forever, Deet, I really do, but I just can’t jump off the cliff yet.” I sat up, hugging my knees. “I know you think I’m being too cautious, and I know it probably hurts you to hear me say stuff like ‘for now’ when you want to hear ‘forever’ but …”

He sat up and put his arm around me. “I get it,” he said quietly. “I get you. And you’re probably right. I’m too much like my mom. I need you to balance me out.”

”You don’t talk about her much,” I prompted. I knew she had passed away not long after he’d won his Oscar, but that was public knowledge.

He scrubbed a hand over his face. “Yeah, I’m still working through some shit in therapy,” he said. “My mom … she was an artist. Painting, sculpture, stuff like that. And that was the love of her life. Art. Creating. And once she created something, she moved on. She wasn’t interested anymore once a piece was done.”

I kissed his shoulder. “You don’t have to talk about her if you don’t want to,” I said. 

“When she and Dad got divorced, she moved to New York City,” he said. “That’s why I went there for college. But about two months after I got there, she moved to Europe. So I went there after I graduated. She was in Italy, so I went to Milan. Then she moved to Madrid, then Stockholm — god, Stockholm was so freaking cold — and then I got tired of following her and came to L.A.” He laid his head on my shoulder. “I was going to visit her in Switzerland after I won the Oscar. She’d actually called me and said she was proud of me. But I had a movie to do first and … it was a car accident in the Alps. She and her latest guy were on their way to Venice and a dude in a Maserati blew a turn and crashed into them.”

”Oh, Deet, I’m so sorry,” My own parents had been ill before they passed, so I’d had some warning, at least. 

He shook his head. “Hey, we’re supposed to be celebrating this weekend, not confessing our darkest moments. So let’s talk about something happy. Like my bank account after the movie earns out and I start getting some checks. We should go somewhere. Romantic getaway.”

”I do have a week off for Thanksgiving,” I said. My aunt always invited me up to her place for Thanksgiving and I always declined and ended up at some friend or co-worker’s Thanksgiving dinner. It was not my favorite holiday.

”Hey, see, making plans for the future.” He nudged me with his shoulder.

”It’s like two months away,” I reminded him. “Not that far in the future.”

”Baby steps, Em. Baby steps.” Then he kissed me and we stopped talking for a while.

******************************************

As I was driving home on Sunday afternoon, my phone rang. I usually don't like to use the Bluetooth, because it distracts me from the road, but I recognized the number. It was Sam.

”Hey, Sam, what’s up?” She rarely called; we both preferred to text. Our grown up version of passing notes in class.

“Just checking that you’re still alive after spending three whole days with Dieter,” she said. Her tone was joking, so I knew nothing serious had prompted the call. “Really, I just wanted to hear your voice. I saw the movie and it just doesn’t seem real that you and Dieter are … I mean, it sounds stupid, but I had to make sure you were still you.”

”I get it,” I said. “Hey, I’m on the freeway right now. Can I call you back when I get home? We can have a good talk. I’ll tell you all about the dress and the red carpet and … maybe you can give me some advice?”

”You better not be thinking of breaking up with him, Em. He’s the best thing that’s happened to you in a long time.”

”No, no, kind of the opposite. Shit, use your signal, you asshole! Sorry, some dude in a Tesla just cut me off. I’ve got to hang up. Talk to you when I get home, chickie.”

”Stay safe, chickie.”

I ended the call and tried to concentrate on the traffic. It was an incredibly long and tedious drive to make every day. There was no way I could keep my job and be with Dieter more than just on the weekends. And I would be foolish to quit for a guy I’d only known for a few months. Right? 

I shoved the thought to the back of my mind. Sam would help me figure it all out. She always did. 

[bloodgulchblog]

Okay okay okay okay. I will dump a list of thoughts and feelings here:

good god rvb get better jokes, a couple were still pretty good but woof. the "you guys are so predictable i could leave a prerecorded message" bit was incredibly stale and i felt like the zoom call joke went on for 15 years.

red team's interactions in the early part of this while sarge is still there are so rote, man.

yes caboose's voice is different, i was curious about how they were going to handle that. (there was a falling out with the old guy, i mostly just know he said some shit during the george floyd protests but looking it up it sounds like something had happened earlier and he'd been laid off in 2019.)

fascinated that sarge's death stuck, but i've always thought grif and simmons without sarge was interesting, so. why not. i feel like with red team especially here, the whole point is that life moves on? this is very much a "you grow up and move on from the things you loved when you were young" kind of story and sarge is one of the most big goofy cartoon parts of the show, so ending him and having grif and simmons figure out how to move on from him has meaning i guess. the older people who shaped your world inevitably pass out of it. not to give rvb too much credit, but hey.

poor tucker, but i still think maybe having an incredibly angsty unexplored subplot might be better than having to spend 2 seasons having all his character growth dissolved away in favor of absent father jokes and whatever the fuck all that shit was in 16

live commentary on the whole thing with red team acting like they were abandoning caboose and then coming back to help him:

also this:

simmons you poor nerd i'm sorry it took all the way to here to give you anything, wasn't expecting this to be a good season for simmons of all people but at least he got something.

THE REAL CURVEBALL WAS I NEVER EXPECTED THEM TO GET KATHLEEN ZUELCH TO REPRISE TEX EVER AGAIN, i was going to make a crack about how tex getting a better ending would've never been on my bingo card in a billion years but i'm actually not sure this counts because i never cared about chex enough to think about it that hard. raincheck.

tex protecting carolina is nothing but it's also everything.

i'm stupid and missed that doc was dead for a while holy shit that's actually really sad and on the one hand oof, but on the other hand i love really sad things. fuck.

restoration donut only coming back for one last stupid fucking gay joke in an aside vs season 17 centering donut and how he was always such a neglected character. hmm. hmmmmm. hmmmmmmmmm.

it's sad wash wasn't there more, but i really did love "wash throws himself off a cliff to intentionally injure himself and summon carolina instead of contacting her in a more normal way" for him.

and i love that if something bad happens to wash carolina will come down on whatever it is like a hammer from orbit. at the very least, it made me so happy to have it reinforced one last time how much those two mean to one another before the end. after everything i enjoy a moment of them being okay.

overall i do think the group splitting up in pieces feels better to me than them all living together in a big weird codependent cluster forever, it feels like a braver and more true ending, but it's one of those things where season 17 was so much better at thinking about the inner lives of a bunch of characters that it's hard for me to say this is clearly better without reservation in all areas. like, sometimes people matter to you intensely for a big chunk of your life but then you have to move on. and fuck, maybe that's not even forever, but i feel good about grif getting to finally go home and i feel good about grif and simmons saying goodbye to one another and trying to be normal about it. let them have some space from one another. they need space to decide who they are with this part of their lives being over.

nothing they did here can stop me from shipping that and i can very easily fanfic out an ending for them in my brain from this. i'm fine. i'm thriving.

POOR POOR TUCKER, please hug tucker, he has to be going through so much right now.

i wonder if locus, somewhere out there, feels like he dodged a bullet and doesn't know why. (i wish he'd had to deal with red team one last time)

idk i probably have more thoughts kicking around feel free to talk to me i've been so insane about this for so long it's my oldest brainrot-

[cricketnationrise]

HELLO!!! ♡ For your ficlet fest: 06:22, Kensington Palace, David. 👀

HI EVIE! I saw your prompt and immediately started writing :D Hope you love it!

Want your own ficlet? Rules here!

❤️🤍💙

kensington palace, 6:22am

David wakes up suddenly to a strange sound. It was a weird sort of wind sound, but he was curled up on his inside bed – there isn’t any wind inside. He closes his eyes again and settles down to sleep some more. Then the noise comes again, and this time David thinks it sounds wetter somehow. He raises his neck up to look around in confusion – there definitely isn’t any rain inside. The third time the noise happens, David realizes it's coming from the big bed that he isn’t allowed on. It’s such a tall bed that David can’t actually see what’s causing the noise. He gets up and shakes the sleep off his limbs, and then jumps from the floor to the super uncomfy padded bench at the foot of the bed and peeks his head over the edge of the mattress. The sight that greets him makes his ears droop and a whine builds in his throat.

His Henry is awake before his alarm. That isn’t so unusual, even in the few weeks since he met His Henry, he’s had terrible sleep patterns. Not like David. David plays hard all day, sniffing and running and following His Henry around the hallways and grassy mazes until he’s eventually so tired he just sort of collapses wherever he is and sleeps until the big noise that means it's time to get up blares through the room. But His Henry doesn’t sleep that much. David sometimes wakes up to His Henry sitting on the floor and petting him, long before the sky gets light.

But today, His Henry is still in his bed, and he’s curled up, sort of like David does when he sleeps. But His Henry isn’t relaxed – he’s clutching at the blankets and his whole body is shaking and there’s wetness on his face and oh— His Henry is crying. David doesn’t think before springing onto the mattress and padding over to His Henry’s pillows. His Henry’s eyes are screwed shut – he doesn’t seem to notice that David is here at all, actually. So David climbs over His Henry’s arm and curls up in the small space between his chest and his chin, pressing his body as much as possible against His Henry’s cooled skin, willing some of his body heat to help.

His Henry keeps crying a little longer but then shudders hard and abruptly freezes at the feeling of David against his chest.

“D-david? What – hic – you’re not supposed to—”

David cuts off any more words of protest by licking up His Henry’s chin and cheeks. His Henry should relax about the ‘rules’ and pet him. It’ll make him feel better.

“Blegh. I suppose you think that was a – hic – gift of some sort.” David does. His Henry is still sniffling a bit, but there’s a smile trying to break through the grim set of his mouth. His Henry shoves himself to a sitting position against the pile of pillows, and David takes the opportunity to jump fully into his lap, tail wagging like crazy. 

“Oof! You watch those paws mister,” His Henry says, trying to be stern, but his hands come up and scritch behind David’s ears and stroke his back. David wags his tail even harder and pushes his head into the feeling. 

“You’re a good boy, yes you are. Coming up here all on your own to pull me out of my dream. Good boy.”

David’s tail wags even harder in triumph. His Henry isn’t crying anymore! And David helped! David should get pets for a while and then they should go outside so David can find all the new smells that happened since yesterday. David has the best ideas, His Henry should listen to him more often.

“Alright, stop barking, you’ll wake the whole wing,” His Henry chuckles, still petting him. “How’s this for a plan, hm? I’ll keep petting you until my alarm goes off in eight minutes, and then we’ll go outside for a long walk around the grounds. Sound good?”

David woofs quietly and lets himself sag all over His Henry’s lap. Helping His Henry, pets, and a long walk: it’s a good morning.

[pesterloglog]

Jade Harley, Roxy Lalonde

Act 6, page 6291-6297

JADE: excuse me but did you just "laugh your ass off" at me under your breath

ROXY: ummm

ROXY: yea

ROXY: maybe

JADE: :|

JADE: i fail to see what is so amusing

ROXY: u do

ROXY: seriously?

JADE: .....

JADE: ok i guess the situation is a little funny because of this absurd folder

JADE: and the fact that i woofed at you probably didnt help either

JADE: but im not here to share a good laugh over the old ladys sense of design or her penchant for scrapbooking!

JADE: i am here to make sure that you do as youre told

ROXY: ugh

JADE: now take the file and review your assignment

ROXY: i already looked at it

ROXY: its dumb and impossible and i aint cooperating w her regardless!

JADE: yes you will

ROXY: can we change the subject

JADE: no

ROXY: arent you jakes grandma

JADE: thats what he told me when we were pen pals

JADE: but i think its more accurate to say im his alternate universe biological daughter

ROXY: oh

ROXY: that clears that up then

JADE: yes, it does :p

JADE: now take the damn folder

ROXY: so alt grannydaughter english

ROXY: whyre u part dog + evil lookin

JADE: DO NOT CALL ME THAT!!!

ROXY: what

JADE: my surname is harley not english

JADE: but you may refer to me as jade, or ma'am if you are feeling especially nervous and deferential

JADE: which as it turns out is the way you should be feeling about me, ALWAYS >:B

ROXY: LOL!!!

JADE: lol WHAT

ROXY: jade i am in no way buying that ur normally this pompous and tyrannical

ROXY: the shtick rly doesnt suit you its so obvious

ROXY: why you doin the batterhags tacky bidding anyway

ROXY: she got you under an xtra terrestrial fish spell or

JADE: SILENCE!!!!!!

ROXY: OOF!

JADE: open the file

ROXY: mrphmmphumph

JADE: OPEN IT!

ROXY: fine :(

ROXY: ok i opened it

ROXY: hey look its the same shit as before

ROXY: im supposed to make this weird knobbly spike ball appear out of nothin

JADE: yes

ROXY: ok got it

ROXY: let me give it a shot then

ROXY: ...

ROXY: welp still impossible

ROXY: what now maam??

JADE: it is not impossible

ROXY: is 2

JADE: you are the rogue of void

JADE: dont you know what that means?

ROXY: i dunno

ROXY: means i can turn invisible and stuff?

ROXY: like the blonde in that crappy superhero quartet

JADE: it means a lot more than that

JADE: your true powers are more impressive than those of anyone else in your crappy quartet

JADE: in fact i would say they are almost as cool as mine >:)

ROXY: not sure the ability to make weird spikeballs outta nothin is all that cool tbh

JADE: not just spikeballs!

JADE: imagine that your title is roughly synonymous with "one who steals nothing"

JADE: what do you think it means to be able to steal nothing?

ROXY: it means

ROXY: im like a shitty cat burglar who sucks at her job?

JADE: WRONG

JADE: it means just the opposite

JADE: it means you can steal the essence of nothingness from something

JADE: you can rob nothingness from an idea if you put your mind to it

JADE: effectively allowing you to conjure virtually anything out of thin air

ROXY: omg

ROXY: u cant be serious

ROXY: that is way too much superpower 4 a dork like me 2 have

JADE: grrrrr...

ROXY: oh no

ROXY: pls dont growl @ me dogjade

ROXY: is legit frightening :(

JADE: im sorry, but your remarks of self deprecation made me very angry

JADE: once i was even more of a dork than you

JADE: but now i am one of the most powerful beings who has ever existed

JADE: i dont want to hear any whining about what you think you cant do

JADE: you are hereby under strict orders from myself and her condescension to "clam up" and conjure that orb, do you understand?

ROXY: so im just supposed to

ROXY: sit here and think about this ugly ball

ROXY: and twiddle my fingers or somethin

ROXY: ?

JADE: you tell me

JADE: space is my racket, not void

ROXY: maybe it would help if i knew what the dang thing WAS

ROXY: how am i supposed to steal the nonexistence from a concept when the concept only exists in my mind as "ugly ball"

JADE: its called the matriorb

JADE: it is the key to resurrecting the troll race

JADE: once you create it the empress will hatch it on an uninhabited planet located beyond the reach of her cruel employer

JADE: there her people will have another chance to thrive without the ever looming threat of extinction that comes with his influence

JADE: so you see roxy, there is nothing noble about refusing to help

JADE: once an entire alien race went extinct because of a terrible monster, and you can help give them a second chance

JADE: dont you want that?

ROXY: um

ROXY: in theory sure i guess

ROXY: but ur basically asking me to bring a lot of people back to life so they can be slaves to that witch

ROXY: u want me to help make all these fresh new trolls but then just turn em over to her? like here you go have fun SNORKELBITCH MEGAHITLER

ROXY: i do not actually think i wanna do that??

JADE: yes fair enough, but heres the other thing...

JADE: if you dont i am going to kill you

ROXY: oh noes

JADE: oh yesses!

JADE: a literal plurality of yesses

JADE: seeing as you are a god tier it is very likely you will come back to life

JADE: so i can just keep killing you over and over a different way each time

JADE: maybe i will disembowel you a few times

JADE: i will not even need to use my sharp doggy teeth!

JADE: i will just snap my fingers and your delicious guts will teleport outside your body

ROXY: ew!

JADE: no way more like yum

JADE: i will just keep on killing you again and again

JADE: until you finally get tired of dying and follow your orders

ROXY: maaan

ROXY: evil jade is sucky jade

JADE: i believe you will find i am the suckiest jade there is

JADE: now we are going to be here in this cell for as long as it takes

JADE: i am not going anywhere until you try doing your voidey thing and make something appear

JADE: is that understood?

ROXY: blehhhh

ROXY: fine

ROXY: why u gotta be so awful jade

ROXY: really putting a cramp on us makin choice new friends w each other

ROXY: oh well here goes

ROXY: all twiddlin my fingers and such

ROXY: busting out tha MAJYYXXX! prayin up a storm to the holy wizardchrist they aint fake...

ROXY: alright check it

ROXY: one jank ass space egg coming up

ROXY: ABRACA HAPPEN!

ROXY: this is not a space egg

JADE: no, its not

ROXY: balls

ROXY: guess i effed up my void spell

ROXY: what is this thing

JADE: thats a perfectly generic object

ROXY: its perfectly generic?

JADE: yes

ROXY: dunno about that

ROXY: looks like a green cube to me

ROXY: with like

ROXY: slightly beveled corners

JADE: thats what a perfectly generic object is

ROXY: couldnt something theoretically be more generic than this

JADE: how

ROXY: um

ROXY: i dunno

JADE: exactly

ROXY: :\

JADE: if you want your powers to reach their full potential youre going to need to become more familiar with the fundamental building blocks of ideas and how they translate into more complicated thoughts and forms

JADE: then it becomes a simple matter of using your abilities to snatch those concepts from unreality

ROXY: sounds too hard

ROXY: better start killing me repeatedly and get it over with

JADE: we both know you dont think its too hard, you think it sounds like an interesting challenge

ROXY: dammit!

ROXY: (fucken jakes wily bitch ass grandma)

JADE: this is a very good start though

JADE: with a little practice im sure our empress will have her orb in no time

ROXY: well at least i know i can make a whole lot of these boring cubes if all else fails

ROXY: hey maybe ill build a sick fort outta them

ROXY: hehehe jade tell me that wouldnt be so baller

JADE: it would be fairly baller

ROXY: fyeah

JADE: keep trying for that orb though

JADE: i will return in a while to review your progress

JADE: and remember, dont get any funny ideas

ROXY: but p much all my ideas are funny

JADE: i mean dont try to escape!

JADE: even if you are invisible i will be able to track you down instantly

JADE: my sense of smell is very good

JADE: now if youll excuse me i have some business to attend to

ROXY: what business

JADE: i am still trying to locate my brother

JADE: but im having trouble picking up his scent

JADE: hes using his windy powers to obscure the trail and its giving me fits

ROXY: windy powers eh

ROXY: who is your bro?

JADE: woof!!!

JADE: i mean shoosh :x

JADE: that is enough questions from you

JADE: now i believe you have a space egg to conjure

ROXY: (mumble mumble egg mumble shove it grumble)

JADE: what?

ROXY: (mumble mutter my fat ass)

JADE: farewell roxy

[artofalassa]

Whats the story behind the Zack wing au? <3

Honestly, Wing AU is more of a visual/aesthetic thing. When it comes to story, we usually focus on the Second Chances AU or the Woof/Floof/Werewoof AU. HOWEVER, there's at least something I can say about it.

Zack wakes up on the battlefield, bloodied and very surprised he's not dead. Cloud and the Buster sword are nowhere to be found. Oh and he has a wing now. So after he freaks out a little, he decides to continue to Midgar, where he hides in the attic of the Sector 5's church. Staying out of sight proves to be a little bit of a problem in his case what with being the huge bubbly idiot who now has a wing on top of everything. Coats, cloaks and cowls are in need now. Let's pretend that FFVII's angels have their wings made of zero bones. Because apparently they do… :'D

Zack tries to stay out of sight, even in front of Aerith. Which-- Not the best idea to stay in the church then, buddy, the flowers know about you, which means so will Aerith soon. I like the thought of her making loud comments to the flowers, making sure Zack hears her up there, but he never responds. The wing business is a little too much for him to bother her with.

He finally makes himself known when Cloud shows up in the church. But only when they are alone. He sits there up on the church beam and calls out to Cloud whose back is to him. As Cloud reaches for the sword ready to defend himself from the monster up there, Zack realizes that Cloud doesn't really recognize him, so he lands down in front of him, showing himself and talks to Cloud until everything comes back to him.

Scenes like this repeat a lot, Zack follows the gang, but only communicates with Cloud. The lab experience together being the bond between them and somehow helping him put up with his… I don't want to say shame? But, uh, … I don't think Zack would be entirely okay with suddenly having a wing too, right?

Unfortunately, Aerith overhears them a few times, but whenever she tries to make a contact, he's gone. Bothering the hell out of both her and Cloud, who feels like Zack's making him out to be even more of a weirdo than he'd appeared like before. Having to lie that he's talking to himself and other funny stuff.

I believe that Aerith has a right to move on. She is basically over him at this moment, but honestly - If a boyfriend disappeared on her five years ago without a word, now she suspects he's suddenly back, but he's avoiding her? Boiiii. I'd be salty too. I still have to think about how they sort it out between them, but they definitely will. No triangles plz. And Zack would absolutely never cheat on her, even though it’s... five... years... later and she thought him dead the whole time.... orz

So all in all, this story is the other way round from the usual - Cloud trying make Zack come out of his shell while he hides. The IronyTM.

He does show up eventually and when Seph appears (either in the Drum or at the end of the highway), the moment Cloud wants to attack Seph, Zack flies in, snatches the sword from Cloud's back (it's his sword after all, right) and attacks Sephiroth himself.

OOF. TLDR! But that's basically the most I have about this whole thing. Heheh! <3

[chazzthegreat]

“You want some more lunch, buddy?”

Mabostiff barked an affirmative, wagging his fluffy tail in excitement. Arven laughed, “I thought so, you greedy mutt. Here.”

He sighed contently and relaxed back into the couch as Mabostiff munched away on the rest of his sandwich. The living room was quiet, besides his pokemon’s little snuffles, so he switched on the TV and didn’t bother changing the channel from whatever cooking show he’d been watching yesterday.

He loved winter break. Days of pure bliss; peace and quiet and quality time with Mabostiff in his own home. Even with all the shit that had gone down only months ago, somehow he’d managed to pass all of his mid-terms. He suspected it was mostly thanks to Nemora’s rigorous enforcement of a studying schedule, but when it yielded these results, could he really complain?

(Yes, he could. Very loudly and very frequently. It was a miracle Nemona had put up with it, but Arven was pretty sure it was just because she was actually enjoying his suffering.)

Lo and behold, the exact same show was playing, some Porto Marinada seafood competition with too much drama and not enough actual seafood. Unfortunately, he had become invested in the “too much drama”, so he’d just been putting up with Linda’s incessant crying and Kofu’s shitty attempts at humor for the past couple of weeks.

At some point, when Linda was shockingly crying again, Mabostiff finished his bowl and started shufffling toward Arven with that face he knew the mutt used just to manipulate him.

“No, buddy,” he said sternly. “Don’t even try it, I know what you’re doing.”

Mabostiff whined in response, looking up through his mane of fur with huge eyes.

“No.” He absolutely refused to give in.

Mabostiff seemed to cut his losses and started shuffling towards the couch instead, slow steps that got faster and faster until Arven realised, too late, what was about to happen.

“Wait, sto-!”

He was cut off by a loud involuntary oof as Mabostiff pounced, landing his front paws directly on top of his chest, and therefore his lungs.

“Ughh, get off, you huge mutt, you’re not a puppy anymore! You weigh like a ton, maybe I’ll stop feeding you as much, huh?”

At those blasphemous words, Mabostiff began his blatant protest by attempting to cover every inch of Arven’s face in doggy saliva. Unfortunately for Arven, Mabostiff’s significantly larger size and strong determination meant he succeeded.

“Ew ew ew, stop!” He couldn’t help but break into laughter, pushing futilely at Mabostiffs huge face. The big lug just woofed and continued slobbering all over him.

Suddenly, the sound of the doorbell chimed through the house, and Mabostiff paused his attack.

“Who could that be, buddy?” Arven muttered, pushing at his paws. Mabostiff gave one last lick for good luck, and reluctantly jumped down, trotting towards the door. Arven followed, slower, trying desperately to wipe all the slobber off his face.

He swung the door open, greeting on his lips, only to be cut off at the sight before him.

“Director Clavell?” He asked incredulously.

Because there, on his doorstep was the director of his school. Sure, he’d seen him around now and then after the events in the crater, but the most they’d communicated had been, like, friendly nods and greetings.

“Master Arven, good evening,” the director greeted with (surprise, surprise) a nod.

“Uh, hello, sir.”

There were a few moments of awkward silence as Arven debated whether it’d be rude to demand why Mr. Clavell was here right after saying hello, until the director spoke again.

“May I?” He gestured towards the door.

“Oh! Uh, yeah, would you like to come in?”

“If this is a good time?”

“Uh…”

Looking back down the hallway, Arven hesitated.

Yeah, sure, it’s not as if Arven had any plans or anything, but… he hasn’t had someone in the house since-

Well, it’s been a while.

And, he’d spent so many years finding a cure for Mabostiff that he’d kind of, uh, slackened off, in the housekeeping department. The dishwasher had been broken for who knows how long, almost all of the rooms were covered in a thick layer of dust, and he’d been avoiding looking outside towards the garden for as long as possible because he didn’t even want to know about it’s current state. Pretty much the only liveable rooms were his bedroom, the kitchen and the living room. And even they were still kind of bad.

Sure, he could pay someone to come in and fix it all up, but he just hadn’t gotten around to it yet!

(That was a lie. He just didn’t want to put his many… shortcomings on display to be judged and scorned by random people.)

It wasn’t as if he could just leave the director outside, though, especially since he’d already invited him in. Plus, if they just stayed in the- respectable rooms, it’d be fine. Probably.

“No, of course, it’s fine, uh, I mean, now’s a good time!”

Arven flushed, stepping backwards in the hope that Mr. Clavell wouldn’t acknowledge his word vomit, and gestured the man inside. With an incline of his head the director walked in.

Only to be assaulted by the dog, as Mabostiff made his very friggin’ large presence known.

“No, down, buddy!” Arven cried. Miraculously, the director didn’t fall over. He simply chuckled and patted the pokemon’s head; greeting “Why hello there, Mabostiff.”

After finally getting his dog under control with a muttered “No sandwiches for you, you dumb mutt!” that he hoped the director didn’t hear (he definitely heard, if his knowing smile was anything to go by) Arven lead him through the hallway, hastily closing doors as he went.

“Here, come through here, it’s the living room. Would you like some, uh, tea? Or anything?”

He didn’t even have any tea.

“No thank you, young man.”

Thank god.

“Cool, cool.” Arven nodded. Another awkward silence reigned as the director sat down on the couch, and Arven just kinda stood there, Mabostiff leaning against his leg.

Finally, the director looked up with sharp eyes, and began to talk.

“I suppose you’re curious as to why I’m here.”

It wasn’t phrased as a question but Arven nodded anyway, petting Mabostiff’s head for comfort.

“Well, it has come to my attention recently that some information brought to light a few months ago has been… overlooked.”

“What do you mean?” Arven had no idea where this was going.

“Regarding your living situation, essentially. It’s my understanding that you’ve been staying at the school during school terms?”

“Yeah…”

“And when school is off, such as now, you’ve been staying… here?”

“Yep.”

“Alone?“

“Uh…” Oh. Uh oh.

When Arven didn’t answer, Director Clavell continued.

“Please excuse my insensitivity, but has Proffessor Turo- your father, has he not been… gone, since you were young?”

He didn’t respond. Involuntarily, his grip in Mabostiff’s fur tightened.

The director sighed, “Master Arven. I’m not quite sure how to put this, so I’ll just say it. I can’t even imagine what you must be going through, especially so young, but I cannot allow this to go on unnoticed any longer- the safety and wellbeing of my students is of upmost priority to both myself and my duties as school director. The issue, which I’m sure you’re aware of, is your age, as the legal age of independence in Paldea is 18, and you’ve been living completely alone since you were only fifteen.”

Silence.

Mabostiff whined, sensing Arven’s anxiety.

He didn’t know how to respond. What was going on? The director just- waltzed in here, brought up his dad and was now making accusations? Sure, they were true, but-

“Now, don’t worry, I don’t plan to force you to leave or anything as drastic- in the case, of course, that you are properly looking after yourself. I just need to know how you’ve been… surviving, on your own, for two years.”

A little tension left Arven’s body, even though he couldn’t help but be annoyed at the director’s interrogation. Who was he to say whether Arven was “properly looking after himself”, whatever that meant?

“Uh… okay, Sir, first of all, I haven’t been on my own, I’ve had my buddy here.” He patted Mabostiff’s head fondly. “And I guess mom made a fortune on those TeraBalls, so I’ve been paying the bills and food costs pretty easily. It’s not like I haven’t had the practice,” he tried to joke.

The professor didn’t even have the decency to laugh. “What do you mean by ‘practice’?”

Arven sighed, frustrated. “Look, Professor, my… my mom was a very busy woman, she had a lot to do. That means she wasn’t around much, but we managed! I learnt how do to all the boring stuff pretty young, so really, there’s no need to worry about us, or anything. All due respect, but it’d be pretty dumb to- I don’t know what you’d do, put us in the foster system? -for living alone when we’ve been doing that pretty frequently since I was seven. Plus, I’m only a few months away from being eighteen, when it’ll be legal anyway.”

Arven flushed after his little speech, a bit embarrassed. He didn’t take back any of his words though, just stood there under the assessing eyes of Director Clavell. It felt like the man was staring straight into his soul.

Whatever the director was searching for he seemed to find, as he let out a short breath and clapped his hands once.

“Very well, master Arven. Please believe that I never doubted your capabilities- or, of course, Mabostiff’s. Now, I believe I’ve taken up enough of your precious holiday time. Thank you very much for inviting me in.”

“Oh, um, sure.” Arven had gotta admit, he was pretty relieved the man was leaving.

Director Clavell stood up, brushed off imaginary lint from his suit, and followed Arven to the front door. He patted Mabostiff’s head in goodbye, but right before he left, he turned back around. He looked determined.

“Master Arven- I can’t convey how sorry I am that you didn’t feel you could ask any adults for help, even if you didn’t need it. I would like to mention that should you want support, or help, in anything at all, even if you don’t strictly need it, I would be more than happy to offer my services. I’m sure many of my colleagues would agree.”

For what felt like the millionth time that evening Arven had no idea what to say. He nodded. For some reason, his throat felt a bit closed up.

The proffessor nodded back, and finally turned to leave, phone already in hand to call a carriage. With that, Arven swung the front door shut in relief, slumping back against the door and sliding to the floor.

“That was one of the weirdest moments of my life,” Arven confessed to Mabostiff as the pokemon came over to lie his head in his lap. “Thank Arceus it’s completely over!”

Mabostiff shot him a doubtful look, but Arven ignored him and stood up. “C’mon, buddy. It’s about time for an afternoon snack, how ‘bout another sandwich?”

…

That very night, in a big office at the academy…

“Ah, Proffessor Saguaro? Yes, it’s Director Clavell. Listen, I have a small favour to ask of you…”

End.

[jamietxrtt]

okay. so i just watched it twice, and here are my thoughts about ted lasso season 3, episode 1. don’t read if you don’t want to be spoiled:

I WAS RIGHTTTTTT ABOUT TED BEING THE FACE OF THIS SEASON I WAS RIGHTTTT I WAS RIGHTTTT. it HAS to be about his growth at the end of the day. that’s what the show’s ABOUT

love the opening on ted’s face while someone calls for the last warning for kansas city. how much do we want to guess the season will end the same way, with a settled, satisfied look on his face this time, while somebody calls “passenger lasso for kansas city”?

“amen big ben” WAHHHH. WHENEVER HENRY MIMICKS TED’S SPEECH PATTERNS IT GETS ME SOOOO

ted immediately joking about drinking alcohol with the gift from his son. hm.

“when you get home, will you give your mom a big squeeze for me and le her know i love her”? i’m not sure that’s still appropriate to say about your ex wife, ted

ted looks so jason-ish with stubble lmao.

I’M SO GLAD HE’S STILL TALKING WITH SHARON. THANK GOD HE NEEDS IT

the way his voice shakes on “hey doc… yeah, no, i’m fine.”

“until my dad remembered to come pick me up”..... he sounds a bit angry in this line….

JESUS HIS FAVORITE TEACHER GOT KILLED BEFORE HE WAS ABLE TO THANK HIM FOR TAKING CARE OF HIM?????? HOW MUCH TRAGEDY WAS IN YOUNG TED’S LIFE HOW MUCH GRIEF DID HE HAVE TO ENDURE

he still has the nate christmas photo up in his apartment, right where it was before, right next to the henry photo……..

“maybe my being here is doing more hurting than helping at this point” very reminiscent of “eventually it seemed like me being around so much was doing more harm than good

“are you seeing anyone?” “pass.” “ahh, you usually say no!” how many times has ted asked if she’s dating someone????

“you finally got off” “not yet i haven’t” GOOD FOR HER?????? GET IT QUEEN

rebecca and higgins just chilling and reading newspapers with each other wahhh i love when they’re friends

the way rebecca keeps referring to west ham as rupert….. oof. oh girl. even ted goes “ohhh boy”. it can’t not be personal for her

i love how whenever rebecca doesn’t know how to respond to something, she just goes “....... okay” with a kind of perplexed half-smile on her face. she’s done it throughout all three seasons and it’s delightful

“maybe they’re trying to motivate us” aww dani

BOTH DANI AND RICHARD IMMEDIATELY CROSSING THEMSELVES WHEN COLIN MENTIONS THE NUN ALSKFJLDKSJFD

“hey, lads! we ain’t gonna get relegated because we’re together! and together… we’ve got me!” AHAHHAA jamie being jamie…. love him forever

everyone throwing towels and stuff at jan mass when he mentions what’s statistically likely to happen LASKJFLKSDJLFKJDSLFJDL something about that is so sweet and friendlylike

beard and roy being FRIENDSSSS

love that ted still keeps the gag from s1 of calling the other coaches pet names, he says “what’s up, sweetie pie” to beard

roy having an inferiority complex by comparing himself to NATE???? that's very…… interesting. especially since nate spent all of last season trying to be roy.

nate in his little green car….

“good morning coach shelley” and he doesn’t even notice. wow…. he’s really embraced this. and then the “there he is, the wonderkid himself” “get out.” WOOF.

KJPR??? Keeley Jones PR????

ohh she’s representing Rebecca at her new company!! rebecca is a client of hers now!!

keeley in a office full of boring stiffs who don’t get her whimsy… aw keeley. don’t let them cramp your style! maybe they’ll be made sympathetic though who knows

and yet she still calls them all “poets and geniuses” even though they clearly don’t like her… keeley you ray of sunshine i adore you

when keeley just throws rebecca’s jacket on a couch and rebecca’s face is just like “uh…. ok” ASLKDFJLSDJFLKDSJFLKSD

KEELEY IMMEDIATELY BREAKING DOWN IN TEARS AS SOON AS THE OFFICE IS COVERED AWWWWWWWW KEELEYYYYYYY. seeing her crying and upset is so upsetting to me. like i see jamie in agony and i’m like YESSSSS but i see keeley upset and i also want to start sobbing

love that rebecca is there to take care of her though <3

and i’m kind of excited! i think this means we’re going to be able to see more of keeley’s internal world this season! one problem with her i’ve always had is that i feel like she’s always a bit too perfect-- she always knows the exact right thing to do, the exact right thing to say, she always gives the best advice. it sometimes felt like she was only ever fixing other peoples’ problems, not dealing with problems of her own. but it looks like she’s allowed to have problems this season!!! yay!!!

the boys chatting while training :) they’re so cute they’re little buddies i love them

roy: “what the fuck are you two talking about, we are outside.” beard: “HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE >:3” i love him

“EVERYONE RUN EXCEPT ROY LET’S GO” so sweet how he’s considerate of roy’s knee :) 

“wow, rupert’s really got stuck in your head these days, huh?” “no! … i mean, yes, but…” get rebecca in some therapy 2k23 on god rebecca we can NOT end the season without you having seen a therapist

barbara lady trying to crush keeley’s whimsy :(((((((

“thank you for the advice” “thank you for your bosom” “anytime” I LOVEEEE TWO FRIENDSSSSS

“this right here is the dum dum line” nate what are you, 5?

“five more minutes of this, then just run them ‘till they drop” WOOF… NOT THE BEST TACTIC TO GET THE TEAM ON YOUR SIDE

when he turns around and the secretary lady is gone and nate does his trademark little “oh my god…..” HE’S STILL THE SAME PERSON. even with all the differences in his life and his personality now he still has that little “oh my god….” think he’s had since the very first season

rupert wearing the all black suit… yes nate was trying to emulate roy with the black suit last season, but maybe he was also trying to emulate rupert???

oooof when rupert slaps the newspaper as he’s laughing, nate flinches and his smile suddenly disappears….. ooooooof oooooof

“they didn’t know what they had letting you go. nathan shelley, you are a killer” MANIPULATION MANIPULATION

nate’s face on “.....i can move it.” like he’s expected to get yelled at…. oof

not lost on me that rupert always calls him “nathan” whereas ted always called him “nate”

so good to finally see those spoilers from a YEAR AGO of the team out and about in those new kits out in london come to fruition… it’s been soooo long. those were the first s3 spoilers we ever got. wonderful

rebecca rushing to see the press conference…. baby you have to learn how to not care

“i’ve had this dry cleaned now six time. can’t believe she wears stuff like this on her eyes”

higgins’ choking sound… love that he still has that

“aint much scarier out there than a creepy clown, right?” then it immediately cuts to rupert HA

jamie with his shirt over his nose is so cute

THE WHOLE TEAM CONGRATULATING BEARD ON GETTING IT RIGHT… SO CUTE

nate’s still harping on the wonder kid thing… dang

NATE PANIC ATTACK????? god just like ted’s…… and then the spit aND THE WAY HE WIPES HIS EYE RIGHT AFTER. NATE YOU MAKE ME WEEP BUDDY

typical nate. feels threatened and so goes on the counterattack. same as jamie did back in s1. best way to get them to stop poking fun at you is to beat them to the punch and lash out at them first.

cutting between the press conference and the boys in the sewer… interesting interesting

jamie’s little “wtf?” hand after roy yells ASLKDFJLSJFLDKSJF

“coach?” “yeah, jamie.” “we’re surrounded by poopeh.” WAHHHHHH I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. MY SON

so many hurt feelings…. so much hurt…. by ted, by the team, by rebecca and higgins…. they all knew nate….. so much hurt here… god

beard WOULD like kenneth

“hey, hey, lads, lads! remember, it’s just poopeh. let it flow.” YESSSSS JAMIE TAKING ON THE TED ROLE AND CONSOLING THE TEAM YESSSSS BABY UR A LEADER ON THE TEAM NOW I’M SO PROUD OF U.

when dani says “clever, jamie, muy intellegento, jamie!” I LOVE HOW MUCH DANI LOVES HIM

also the way ted was ready to step in but both beard and roy stopped him because they knew it was time to let someone on the team reinterpret ted’s philosophy… yesssss

when rebecca calls him “coach lasso” instead of ted…..

“i am begging you. please. fight back.” but then later ted ignores that advice and does his charm and disarm that he usually goes with, and keeley sends rebecca that text “way to let ted be ted!” really reaffirms that rebecca was in the wrong there, that she had to trust how ted was going to handle it

ted going full self-deprecating in the face of nate’s insults is so perfect too. like yes, he still compliments nate, never says a bad word about him, refuses to stoop to his level. but it endears him to the public-- and, crucially, it also IS kind of a way to backhandedly get at nate. it’s a way for ted to come off looking more clever and quick-witted and smart, at the end of the day. it’s a way for him to win this battle without ever putting up a fight.

interesting too how it calls back to the advice he gives rebecca in s1 at the gala-- “just a trick of the trade, make fun of yourself, right off the bat. folks will love that.” here he’s employing his own advice. making fun of himself to endear himself to the public.

“i’ve had more psychotic episodes than twin peaks” SO interesting to me that he’s able to so freely talk about the panic attacks and make fun of himself for it here… very very interesting. not sure how i feel about that

the way nathan’s father is still upset about him swearing??? like he’s 14 or something???? his parents infantilize him SO MUCH…. i’m sure that’s where a lot of his issues regarding respect ultimately stem from

buying nate the new car… something to be said here about status and class, but i’m not smart enough to say it.

“it’s a car” and nate laughs at first because he thinks she’s kidding, but then he’s like “oh wait…. oh.”

OKAY. LOOK. I KNOW IT’S BAD FOR HIS DEVELOPMENT AS A PERSON. BUT. THAT CAR SEQUENCE WAS SICK AS HELL.

roy is looking at keeley while keeley looks down at her phone… then she puts down her phone and looks at him, and he immediately looks down at his drink…. oof.

keeley’s jacket is so spectacular. not the point but i love it

“we’re going on a break” vs. “we broke up”... ooooof

“because…. we thought you’d wanna hang out with me sometimes” AH. KEELEY SOUNDS SO INSECURE ON THIS LINE. BABEEEEEE

roy’s whole face journey before he says “we’re too busy.” is… oof. got me in my feels

keeley trying to comfort roy about his anxiety about not being a good enough coach, but then she has to stop himself…. babe you can’t do that anymore. it’s not your place. he’s not yours like that anymore.

if i had to rank these people in order of how well they’re handling this interaction, it would be: phoebe, keeley, roy. roy’s really not doing much of the legwork here. and phoebe is astounding in how she’s managing to smooth out their feelings, instead of the other way around. i NEED to meet her mom

“i think you’re being stupid” not messing around phoebe, i like it

beard never gives his opinion when ted expresses how he’s not sure why they’re still here.. unsure what that means. he thinks they should go home but doesn’t want to mess with ted’s headspace even more? he thinks ted should figure this one out himself and doesn’t want to influence him? he’s bothered by ted’s unquestioning use of “we” (“wonder why we’re still here.”) when maybe what beard wants is different from what ted wants? could be any of the above. i’m not sure

putting lego nate next to lego ted….. weeping sobbing crying

“who’s jake?” “mommy’s friend.” “..........great…..” AHHHHHHHHHH. poor ted is going throughhhhh ittttttttt

[hip-hoppin-hobbits]

Played suicide of Rachel foster last night in full and I didn't know what it was about nor the problems the game had before I had played it.

Some spoilers here but whatevs.

I like these kind of style game,where you roam around and discover a story as you go along. (reminded me a lot of firewatch, right down to the phone and a disembodied voice talking to you during the game.) They can get dull yes but add a horror/suspense element and I'm sold.

And oof wow yeah there's issues with this one.

Main characters adult father has an affair with a 16 year old with a disability who then became pregnant!! And instead of condemning it, it's often written as a great love and totally not predatory at all. What? Yikes!

I really think it would have been such a better story if it became: " I had an affair with the priests wife and that Rachel is my child,and I wanted to have a relationship with her when she got older and she was clearly struggling and then I had discovered she had become pregnant. Couldn't say anything to protect everyone but it actually got worse and people thought I was having an affair and my wife killed her before everything was explained"

Would sound lot better and some of the actual components of the layout would work really well with it. The hidden room? A father trying to imagine a life with a daughter he didn't have,even though he had one of his own bit still hated not being a father for her.

The voice being her brother? Didn't know the whole thing until after the event and still didn't think she killed herself. Mom could still be the murderer and we would have an actual better "motive of misinformation/misunderstanding" because he couldn't fully tell her he cheated on her so she thought he was having an affair with a child and killed her.

Like. That would be so much better than: "my father's a pedo but it's cool! It's love!!" Woof...

[zhindian]

Judgment Day 2022 Recap: Part 11

Now that the server is up, time for a recap!

Let’s pick up where we left off, after the Judgment Day defeated Riddle and Rey.

Monday Night Raw 9/19/22: Make AJ an offer he can’t refuse

Notes: Dominik made a oops mistake prior to this, calling Rhea Mami instead of Papi. It was awkward, but that mistake looks like it for the best. Rhea ran with it, as she’s both mami and papi, depending on what Don wants. Plus, it got her some mech that was worn by Vicki.

I like how Finn just rolls up on AJ here, throwing up too sweets and making thinly veils threats about what will happen to AJ if he doesn’t join JD. Finn goes from serious to smiling in a blink of an eye.

This will get referenced on the next Raw.

Monday Night Raw 9/26/22: Good boy

Seth Rollins is taking on Rey Mysterio, who wants to take his anger out on anyone. Dominik then comes to ringside with chair in hand.

Notes: Canadian audiences are ruthless. Dom is useless chants. Woof.

I love how concerned Seth was about Dom coming to ringside with the chair, then gets elated when Dom gives him a reassuring pat, showing that he hasn’t forgotten his and Dom adversary history. Seth even gives Dom a dap later 🤣

Rey Rey gets blasted into the ring post by Rhea, who was working off of Dom’s distraction. He then gets taken out by Seth, as he passes out in Seth’s submission. Things just aren’t going Rey’s way.

Rhea tells Dom Dom “Good boy.” after all this. Ma’am 🫠

After AJ is defeated in his match, The Judgment Day, led by Finn, come with an offer to join…and Finn does not like the answer;

Notes: One little thing I love about JD? Their timing. See how that when Dom, Rhea, and Priest climbed onto the ring apron, they did it at the exact same time. It makes for cool visuals.

Finn still wants AJ to join, but AJ is not having it, offering a middle finger to Finn’s too sweet gesture. Priest’s face when AJ does the middle finger in Finns face is hilarious 🤣

AJ gets beat down for this, and almost gets conchairto’d but Finn backs off saying he doesn’t do it to a friend. Oof. Some friend.

This feeds into Priest and Riddle’s match. Priest loses, but guest who returns:



Notes: Edge was moving mighty fast with a knee injury lol.

I love how Rhea pulled Dom to safety after Edge speared Priest. Such a supportive domme 🥰

Finn gets speared as well, and one thing I’ve always liked is no matter if they win or lose, they’ll group up. No one is left by their lonesome while the others retreat. Here they group up to help Finn get away.

Edge stating that he never gives up, challenges Finn to an I Quit match and Extreme Rules. Funny…Edge would never say he would quit, but would he for someone else?

That’s it for part 11! On to the next!

And if you want, you can check my server:

[scruffyplayssonic]

Are the ArchieSonic comics actually an 80's/90's syndicated cartoon?

Welcome back to my look at the ArchieSonic comic series, and how it shared a lot of the same story tropes as a typical ‘80’s or ‘90’s syndicated cartoon.

Episode 8: Now they're giant! 

Our first example today comes from the Knuckles Chaotix special! If you’ve played the game, then you probably won’t be surprised by what happens: 

Yup. Metal Sonic Kai, also known as “O lord he comin’!” But those of you who played the game might be surprised at how this is resolved in the comic:

Yup, Knuckles gets big too! Why? Because Ken Penders, that’s why. 

For our next example we’re going back to Sonic Super Special #12, which had a secondary story called, “Zone Wars: Giant Robotno.” Sonic gets recruited by Zonic the Zone Cop (long story) to help an alternate world that’s in peril. 

Sonic finds himself in a dimension where the local Eggman is actually a good-hearted scientist called Dr. Kintobor. Unfortunately he was experimenting with splitting a Chaos Emerald on a distant island, resulting in the radiation mutating the “wildlife” - Sonic’s friends in this dimension - into kaijus. 

Sonic uses a giant robot to fight them off as he’s trying to get the split Chaos Emerald back, but accidentally kills his alternate-world father in the process. Big oof.

Also in the category of “Now they’re giant,” I present: Titan Tails.

…I will not be answering any questions regarding Titan Tails at this time.

Woof, that was a lot of messed up stuff. Maybe the Sonic X comics will give us something a little less dramatic? Oh yes, here we go. Sonic X #6 featured a story where Eggman tried to take over the world with an army of dark chao.

But as we all know, if you mess with the Chao then a certain God of destruction is going to have something to say about it. This time though he uses the positive energies of the Chaos Emeralds to become a very different Perfect Chaos.

Oh, and we of course have to mention the more traditional form of Perfect Chaos too, as it certainly falls under the category of suddenly becoming a giant.

Oh, and apparently there is one other giant story from Sonic X. Issue #39 featured the evil supervillain group “S.O.N.I.C.X” turned Vector the Crocodile into a kaiju.

…and apparently he was defeated by a giant Bokkun?!

What even was this comic?!

Whew, that was a lot. And in some instances, it was a lot. Hopefully tomorrow’s post will be more lighthearted. What is the next episode, anyway? Let’s see… ahhh. “Episode 9: Fall in love at first sight! Oh wait, turns out she’s evil.” …oh. Well, I’m sure you all know where this one is going. 😛

Thanks for reading, everyone! Did I miss any other examples of anyone suddenly becoming giant? Drop me a comment and let me know!

[ambivalence-and-torpor]

Oof.. yeah that doesn't sound like an easy time.. Sounds really messy if I have to be honest.. But Ketana? Woof.. You should be extra careful about him. I'm sure you already are but.. uh. I don't think he's someone you should mingle with.. Masayo does occasionally speak with him but I think if that guy knew about you or Riyyao. Bad stuff is surely to come. I'd like to say Masayo would intervene but he's not everywhere at one time.. just be careful? Pretty please?

TA: [() ≡ *:･ﾟ✧ The Entire Situation Is Effed Up. TA: [() ≡ *:･ﾟ✧ I Didn't Choose To Be A Descendant Of This Bloodline, But Here We Are...

TA: [() ≡ *:･ﾟ✧ I'm Doing My Best To Be As Careful As Possible, But... TA: [() ≡ *:･ﾟ✧ It's Only A Matter Of Time Really...

TA: [() ≡ *:･ﾟ✧ Ketana...

She sighs in defeat.

TA: [() ≡ *:･ﾟ✧ Masayo Said That He's Not... Evil At Heart, But He's In Deadeye's And Rivetess' Clutches. TA: [() ≡ *:･ﾟ✧ We Wanna Keep Riyyao Out Of All Of This, And Maybe Get Ketana Out Of There... Though I Honestly Don't Know How To Contribute Yet...

TA: [() ≡ *:･ﾟ✧ For Now I'm Just... Making Sure My Little Brother Is Well Taken Care Of...

[1ightcap]

STARGATE REWATCH BECAUSE IT'S SEMI RELEVENT TO CWR BOOK CLUB AND BECAUSE I NEED SOMETHING TODO WHILE GRINDING IN SATISFACTORY LETS GO

The gate having been unused for so long that air force members have started using the gate room for secret poker is pretty good

oh boy howdy this gate CG though, the event horizon splashy effect is fine but anytime anyone needs to interact with the gate, woof The blonde lady officer being kidnapped also feels very 1997 double oof

The Retractable cobra helmets that gaould and gang wear kinda fuck though. The glow eyes and double layer voice are also cool ass effects, just otherworldly enough to sell it OPENING THEME STILL FUCKS!!! Jack introduced with him look at the stars when a nebbish air force rando shows up, and he is like, quit and switch to NASA that is where the wind is blowing and that's cute but also I WISH. Its air force all the way down on this show.

Also he looks, so goddamn young OBSESSED WITH THIS CONSTELLATION MECHANICAL KEYBOARD

i wish they had kept Daniel's allergies, like, Rodney kept his weird lemon thing and being hornt up about MRI's, let Danny be a soft sneezy boy The Sam intro scene is so goddamn weird. Like we god sexist vibes guy, guy who is talking about how wack the stargate feels and then jack is like super anti science in a way that feels extremely dated. He was star peeping like 5 minutes and now he is like, "a physicist? what is that?". Also she def has some Strong Independent Woman vibes dfghj

"this has nothing do with you being a woman, I *like* women...I just got a little problem with scientists" NOOO. why is he acting like that's a normal thing to say??

Look how much gear they got LMAO. In Like year two of Atlantis there sending folk out into the wilds of the Pegasus galaxy with a windbreaker and slacks Okay them mentioning the gulf war, getting kitted out in full desert ass fatigues and then getting an armed standoff with the civilians on Abados is, uh, sure something

EEE oh yeah the Shari stuff deff pings weird. Amanda tapping's teeth are so white I am not going to note it every time but yeah, very clunky handling of the ~locals~ LMAO that Daniel and Shari keep making out like high schoolers is funny though RIP they kidnapped the only two plot relevant characters FIRST DANIEL TEARS OF THE SHOW. Oh Michael shanks, how they will take advantage of your emotional range by inflicting constant psychic damage on Daniel The Harem of possible wives stuff also very dated, and corny. Also random full frontal nudity of Shari,,, well. i guess it was on showtime. These scenes might be unsalvagable if it wasn't for the actor who is playing Apophis's pure camp

ANOTHER GREAT DAY ON PLANET KOWALSKY. This guy is great hope he lives. Oh RIP no, he got worm'd

[ask-the-shorty-squad]

I like that enthusiasm! Although it'd be better saying it louder and prouder! Like this!!

They did everything they could for us!!! So its high time we do everything we can for them!!! Let's stop ASU-NARO! Once and for all!!!!

Awh, yeah!! Nailed it to a tee, woof!!

That's right!! We will stop ASU-NARO!!! For them!! And for everyone else!!!

Oh yeah!! Theres more about ASU-NARO you probably didnt know!!

On the surface, ASU-NARO is an upstanding and clean company that does medical research, meow. But in reality they're connected to shady businesses and produce illegal drugs and euthanizing medicines, woof. They've also been heard to commit inhumane research which is likely experimentation into reproducing humans. They hold immense power in the criminal underworld to the point it wouldn't be an exaggeration to say they control it!

The organization has been keeping an eye on the Death Game candidates for an untold number of years. The AI personalities of the candidates were last updated two and half years ago and are updated every three years woof! Implying the candidates have been watched for much longer. So who knows how long Seaweed head watched me grow up!!

Wait!! This means he could've seen my true form!! Oof!! That isnt good, meow!!! If he leaks it I'll be doomed forever and ever!! How did I not realise this sooner!!

That's his main concern? Not like, being watched for years and years? If someone was watching me for years and years I'd.. Actually, I dont wanna think of that...

The thought alone feels disturbing.

[mysteriesofmarcy]

Mystery Monday #39: Big Deal or No Big Deal?

From a game show, to a song, to a combination of the two, please welcome Anne Boonchuy and Hoppie Manwell!

Anne: Thank you! It's great to be here, dude!

Hoppie: Thanks Anne! Now, let's hear a little about your journey.

Anne: [deep breath] Well... I came to Amphibia, all alone, quickly made some friends, stayed in their basement for three months, slowly befriending the entire town in the process, reunited with my old friend, had a swordfight, blew up a tower, journeyed to the city, reunited with another old friend, met the king, went on this epic temple quest, returned to the city, only to find out that the king was an evil despot, got sent back home before I could say goodbye, spent that time trying to get back to Amphibia, joined a rebellion against the king led by my old friend and HQ'd in my home town, gained allies, fought back against the king, learned that my other old friend was trapped in her own mind, freed her, saved the world from the king's evil -- I dunno, his lord or something, dying in the process, got revived, said goodbye to my family, went back to earth, and became a herpetologist.

Hoppie: OK, thanks for that! Sounds like we might get done early if you keep talking that fast.

Crowd: [laughs]

Hoppie: OK, let's start the game! Anne, choose a case to keep.

Anne: I choose case #20 to keep.

Hoppie: Good choice! Now we move on to the main game. Select a case to open!

Anne: #4!

Hoppie: Keltie, please open the case.

Keltie: [opens the case] 🥁🥁🥁

Hoppie: Girl Time! Remember, when you and Polly went out on the town?

Anne: Oh yeah, I remember! I tried to get her into some stuff I like, but she didn't really want to be there.

Hoppie: Now let's see what Girl Time is worth. Keltie, please open the flap.

Keltie: [opens the flap]

Hoppie: One penny!

Anne: Woohoo! Perfect score! [She does a little dance]

Hoppie: Excellent, let's go again. 5 more cases before the first offer.

Anne: #16!

Hoppie: Kim, please open the case.

Kim: [opens the case] 🥁🥁🥁

Hoppie: Oh, looks like the time you arrived in Amphibia!

Anne: Woof. Worst day of my life. Can we just forget this one?

Hoppie: Sorry Anne, no can do. Kim, let's see how much that's worth...

Kim: [opens flap]

Hoppie: Ooh, $750,000! That's a big hit!

Anne: Oof. Now I really wanna forget it.

Hoppie: That's OK, shake it off. 4 more cases.

Anne: #26!

Hoppie: Ooh, going for the last one. Let's see what's inside. Lindsay, if you please?

Lindsay: [opens the case] 🥁🥁🥁

Anne: Oh, oh! I remember that! That was the greatest day of my life! The day I met Sprig!

Hoppie: Well, let's open the flap to see how much it's worth.

Lindsay: [opens the flap]

Hoppie:

Anne: Oh no! The million! I just lost the top two amounts in the game back-to-back!

Hoppie: It's OK, you could still walk outta here with half a million.

[Anne's head droops]

Hoppie: Hey, cheer up, kiddo! Maybe the next one will be low!

Anne: Alright.

Hoppie: That's the spirit! So. What case would you like next?

Anne: #18 please.

Hoppie: Alright. Marisa, show us a low number.

Marisa: I'll do my best, Hoppie. [Opens the case] 🥁🥁🥁

Anne: Huh? What's that? I remember Sprig trying to use it in Newtopia, but I don't have a clue what it's called.

Hoppie: Barrel's Warhammer. Sasha retrieved it from a giant narwhal's back.

Anne: Why did she do that?

Hoppie: Because she and Grime were trying to start a toad rebellion against Andrias, but the other toads tasked them with bringing them the ancient weapon.

Anne: Ah. And she picked it up right before the third temple, right?

Hoppie: Yes.

Anne: OK. Well I have no idea how significant that was, so... show me a low number, Marisa!

Marisa: [opens the flap]

Hoppie: $400! That's pretty low.

Anne: Eh, it's more in the mid-range. But I'll take what I can get!

Hoppie: Alright, next case!

Anne: I choose... case #6!

Hoppie: Megan! Let's see what's inside that case!

Megan: [opens the case] 🥁🥁🥁

Anne: This one's not ringin' a bell either.

Hoppie: This is when Darcy sliced Sasha in the back during their fight.

Anne: Really? How come she didn't look hurt afterwards?

Hoppie: Well...

Megan: [opens the flap]

Anne: Only $50? Wow. I'd'a thought for sure that would be more significant.

Hoppie: It sure seemed like it! But no, her wound healed as soon as she get her Calamity Power.

Anne: Oh. How come she didn't show it before that?

Hoppie: Well, you know how tough she is.

Anne: Oh, that's... true...

[Awkward silence]

Hoppie: OK, last case for this round!

Anne: I choose #14!

Hoppie: Alright April, end us on a high note!

April: Alright Hoppie, here's hoping!

Hoppie: Ooh, ouch!

Anne: Oh, I remember that one. I take it back, Hoppie. THAT was the worst day of my life. But I guess Marcy had an even worse day, huh?

Hoppie: That's right, Anne. Nobody saw what Andrias did coming, not you, not Marcy, only Sasha and Grime.

Anne: Wait. You mean to tell me that they knew of Andrias's true nature BEFORE we went to Newtopia?

Hoppie: Nope, only after they took over the city and started redecorating the castle.

Anne: Oh.

Hoppie: They took down a banner of the king loving and nurturing his subjects, only to discover another one of him committing mass murder and destruction.

Anne: Yikes!

Hoppie: Yeah. Honestly you had no good way out at that point.

Anne: Oh. Well that actually makes me feel a lot better.

Hoppie: Glad to hear it. Anyway, April, if you please?

April: [opens the flap]

Hoppie: Ooh! $75,000!

Anne: Well that's not... that bad, right?

Hoppie: Well, not the worst, but not the best either. It all depends on the banker's offer...

Hoppie: [picks up the phone] Hello? Yeah. OK. [laughs] OK, bye. [hangs up]

Hoppie: He said he's impressed that you managed to find the penny and the top two dollar amounts in your first three cases.

Anne: I'm not sure whether to take that as a compliment or an insult.

Hoppie: Relax kid, it's all random. Anyway, the offer was...

Anne: Oh! I remember that! That was when me and the Plantars got zapped to earth, right?

Hoppie: Indeed it was.

This could be a Big Deal. You and your new family had to adjust immediately to a wild new environment, you had to confront your parents about where you were all that time, you had to give the Plantars a course on earth living, your parents had to take in three anthropomorphic frogs as long-term houseguests, and you knew you left your friends back in Amphibia.

On the other hand, it could be No Big Deal. You spent most of your time on earth either trying to hide the Plantars so they couldn't really do anything, or trying to figure out a way to get back to Amphibia. Plus, you returned to Amphibia as soon as you possibly could. And it's not like that was the last time you were ever on earth or anything.

Crowd: [laughs]

Hoppie: So, Anne Boonchuy, Big Deal, or No Big Deal?

Crowd: Big Deal!

Also crowd: No Big Deal!

Anne: Well...

This would be a much bigger deal if I was from Amphibia, but I'm not. But, it was still a HUGE change in status quo and setting. I'm going to say...

[Presses button]

BIG DEAL!

Hoppie: Alright, you are walking out of here with whatever that moment was worth. But because we here at Big Deal or No Big Deal like to keep playing the game, we will continue the game next week as if you had said No Big Deal!

And if YOU would like to play at home, send in your Mystery Monday ideas to this blog!