#Oh- also I very much treat Halloween 2 as canon so that means that I just have too much love for the Myers Siblings lmao

[fastcardotmp3]

Oh would you so kindly expand on your Murray/that plotline™ thoughts? Btw I didn't remember it as a cheating situation but since it's been so long since watching that season i was taking other people's word for it. And yeah i don't think Murray did anything even if it was. like he didn't make them have sex.

I started to type out an answer to this ask, forgot to save it as a draft, and lost all of my thoughts, so apologies if this is a little disjointed but! I will do my best to give my thoughts coherently <3

I really do think the Murray thing is maybe a mischaracterization of his intentions, but also not the thing I care most about when it comes to narratives that deal with Steve/Nancy/Jonathan situation in season 2, because at the end of the day it's just another reframing of the same tired take tbh

I'll stick it under the cut though because I know I can be wordy

There's this, like, company line in this fandom that Steve and Nancy were just two teenagers who hurt each other, which I one hundred percent agree with, only that tends to be the company line everywhere except for the Steve-centric fics that get written about that plotline, which instead seem to frequently make an argument that "Nancy cheated on Steve, was cruel enough to cause long-term emotional damage, and then either is forced to grovel for forgiveness or be shut out of his and his friends' lives forever" which is. Not that. Right?

Fandom cultures at large, not just this one, are more willing to do empathetic, in-depth character analysis of male characters than they are female. This is something we know to be true and this is something that is noticable in how Nancy gets treated by fanon, especially when it comes to her relationship with Steve.

Because here's the thing, we could debate it all day (and I won't, for the record, if anyone's thinking about starting a fight) but for my part, what she did wasn't cheating. From the very first time I watched season 2 when it was released, I always read the Halloween fight and the morning after as a breakup.

HOWEVER, even if Nancy did cheat on Steve? It doesn't warrant the downright malicious Nancy characterizations that often feel ubiquitous to this fandom.

Even if Nancy did cheat, there is a refusal to look at the situation from her point of view, something which even Steve is canonically able to do by the end of season 2 (we'll get to that). Because there's more nuance here to take into account than just Nancy making a choice to specifically hurt or break Steve and there's more nuance here than Steve being incapable of moving on from this breakup.

In fact, if you really look at the choices both of them are making, it has very little to do with each other and everything to do with their own reactions to immense personal trauma and grief. Nancy has spent a year suppressing a mourning she's not allowed to experience out loud, and you expect her not to snap eventually?

Does personal hardship mean cheating is, like, a good thing (if that's the takeaway you're going with from canon)? No. Does it still wildly differ from the cruel and intentionally malicious version of Nancy that shows up in far too much fic? Yeah.

She's a teenage girl whose best friend died in a violent and preventable way at sixteen years old. Nancy tried to fit herself into Steve's coping strategies, tried to let it all go back to normal, and was visibly hurting in the process. She sought out comfort. Understanding. A chance to be heard.

It's a disservice to both of their characters to treat this like there's a "good" and "bad" guy, when the way they handle it in canon, the way Steve comes to terms with it (literally within days he is telling her to go with Jonathan, by the way), is all vitally important to their growth.

When Steve says "I may not be a very good boyfriend" that's not about him being down on himself or having low self worth, it's a moment of growth and self reflection/ awareness for him to acknowledge that in his efforts to make himself feel better, he also hurt Nancy. It's about him no longer being in the same bitter headspace of "what am I apologizing for?" that he was at the start of the season, and having the maturity to see that they don't work as they are at their current mental states, no matter how heartbreaking that may be for him.

And Nancy choosing to go with Jonathan is really just a continuation of everything she was doing in trying to get justice for Barb-- she's choosing to follow her heart after being trapped away from acknowledging it for so long.

In other words, not only does he not have reason to, but Steve doesn't hate Nancy, Steve doesn't hold a lifelong grudge against Nancy, Steve doesn't think Nancy is a cruel and unfeeling bitch, but fic authors sure seem to.

If it were just a handful of fics here or there, I wouldn't be so adamant about it, but it's such an ingrained narrative in this fandom that sometimes I think people have genuinely forgotten the canon context.

Don't strip them of their agency and everything they learn from getting together and falling apart by making Steve less emotionally competent and Nancy more borderline abusive than either of them are.

It's boring and it's sexist and it shouldn't be the norm.

but that's just my 2 and a half cents peace and love anon, hope this answered your question <3

[gophergal]

Who’s your favorite slasher? Honestly, I like original Freddy Krueger but they personally did him dirty in the remake and went completely off the storyline and I was really disappointed🙁

So, this ask is a little funny to me because it means that you've not been here very long lol. My number one favorite is Michael Myers! Legit almost every version of him, I just love him so much. Can't get enough of him. My preferred Michael is from the original movie though.

Aside from Mikey, I like most slashers. I have a soft spot for Harry Warden from My Bloody Valentine (1981), Friday the 13th Part 2 Jason specifically, Candyman (the original), Billy/The Moaner from Black Christmas (1974), Vincent and Lester Sinclair from House Of Wax (2205), and Leatherface (Thomas and Bubba both!)

So, what I'm saying is that I hoard murder men. Funnily enough, Freddy is actually one of the few that I'm not a massive fan of, but it's only because he freaks me out a lot. However, I think Freddy Simps are some of the coolest folks in our community! (especially my buddy Bex/@bisexual-horror-fan . Legit every freddy fucker needs to follow her) They really DID do him dirty in the remake! And it sucks that some asses in the community treat it as Ultra Canon and, thus, a reason to be mean to Freddy Fans!

Bonus: I'm very very gay, so if you genderbend legit any slasher into a woman I become a huge simp. Freddy included! Also, I have a lot of love for the final girls! Laurie is my absolute favorite <3

[zeppelin-and-unicorns]

Fanfic recommendations part five: Alternate Universe (canon divergence)

I am going to make three AU posts, one with AU’s that diverge from canon (this one), one with 100% AU stories, and one with Soulmate AU stories, I’ll probably post the next category tomorrow or maybe even today.

After the AU’s there are only two more categories left, Christmas fics and Crossovers! After that I will make a master post with the link of all the previous fanfic recommendations posts.

Enough rambling, this is a long category, which means, long post.

a retro romance by poeticlyme

Jackie Burkhart, the Princess of Point has an unrequited crush on a certain paranoid burnout. Or is it so unrequited?

Please read this story, it’s amazing and I love it!!! The slow burn and the sexual tension between Jackie and Hyde in this story is everything!!

This story is a WIP and it’s being updated constantly.

59k words, 18 chapters for now.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, background Eric/Donna and Kelso/Brooke.

Cheater, Liar by Maleesha (MalissaNgov)

Jackie hates cheaters.

(or when Jackie is less naive and Hyde was more aware of her situation.)

This story is a WIP.

36k words, 12 chapters for now.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Contact by tanith75

Stop what you’re doing and go read this story right now!! It’s amazing, this story is definitely on my top 10 favorite stories of all time.

What if the night Hyde and Jackie stood in the Forman driveway, kissing, the sliding door hadn't been locked? What if Kelso had gotten outside in time to confront Hyde? What if...

This story is not complete, but please don’t let this stop you from reading it.

53k words, 10 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, background Eric/Donna

Everything Works If You Let It by Ultrawoman

Jackie and Hyde pretty much hated each other from the get go, and yet he still agreed to take her to Prom. Kelso was unable to win Jackie back that night, and everything changed between the rich cheerleader and the Zen Master. S1 rewritten from 'Prom Night'.

This story is complete and it’s SO CUTE.

60k words, 23 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Endless Midnights by Anonymous

Were they stupid? Of course. Were they terrified? Duh. Were they doing it anyway? Hell yeah.

In which Hyde feels guilty about covering for Kelso and Jackie finds out about Laurie much sooner.

BOY OH BOY THIS STORY IS AMAZING PLEASE READ IT.

This story is complete.

54k words, 17 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, background Eric/Donna

Escaping The Friendzone by KayRight

Jackie doesn't take Kelso back at their prom. Instead, she starts an odd friendship with Hyde. They both want more but the only problem is he thinks she's on the rebound and she thinks he's not interested.

This story is complete.

73k words, 23 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Also Available on AO3

Going to California part 2 by holograma209

What if the whole gang went on a road trip to California after graduation, finding themselves along the way? Set at the very beginning of season 6.

This story is a WIP, it hasn’t been updated in a while but I still have faith.

11k words, 5 chapters for now.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna

Halloween: Extended Cut by Hyde’s Bride

An extension of the season two episode, "Halloween". Jackie forgets her poncho in the field where the gang buried their permanent records. Hyde goes back with her to get it. What tricks or treats will be in store for them on this Halloween night?

I love horror stories (even though I’m scared shitless of them) and this one is really nice! It’s not THAT scary, so don’t worry.

This story is complete.

8k words, 3 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

High on Summer series by QueenBookBuff

Hyde has been craving Jackie for a long time. It's summer time, anything is possible, and he is positive she will be his new favorite drug.

This is a WIP.

9 works on this series for now, according to my calculator, the entire series has 26k words.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Hyde Bags Jackie by gah-linda

After s3ep8 “Jackie Bags Hyde”, Jackie and Hyde start a very steamy affair behind everyone’s backs.

This story is abandoned, but it’s pretty good.

75k words, 23 chapters.

Rated M. Very, very M. Seriously, this work has a lot of sex, but the story’s plot is overall very interesting, I really like it.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna

I’ll be There by crimsinsky

When Jackie finds out that Kelso cheated on her again, she was hurt that her so called friends didn’t tell her. A new friendship happens starts up, and an old relationship turns obsessive.

This story is a WIP, and it’s being updated constantly.

26k words, 19 chapters so far.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, background Eric/Donna

Knowing Me, Knowing You by Writerperson100

After being cheated on by her second boyfriend, Jackie accepts her aunt’s offer to come live with her.

When her past is ready to catch up with Jackie, will she be ready to face it?

This story is complete.

61k words, 26 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, background Eric/Donna

Movies As Friends by rymilu

Jackie realizes a few things about herself after her kiss with Hyde. She once more tries to bag him after Michael and Donna leave to California, no longer hiding her feelings. Instead of pressuring him like before, she decides to start with taking him to the movies.

This story is a WIP.

38k words, 6 chapters so far.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Never Look Back by Shabbuuu

Jackie and Hyde decide to leave Point Place instead of waiting for Kelso to return.

Pretty sure this is an abandoned story, but the ending of the last chapter was nice, and they’re happy, so...

20k words, 17 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

New York, New York by Shabbuuu

This one is also on my top favorite stories of all time, do yourself a favor and read this, it’s amazing.

What if Hyde did go to New York City with Chrissy? It's 1981 and Jackie has just moved to NYC for a job. What happens when she runs into a familiar face at a bar?

This story is complete.

40k words, 38 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Of All Things Creepy and Unnatural by CaedanceLaura

Also on my top favorites, lol. I can’t help myself, I really love AU’s.

What if Donna and Eric hadn't found out about Hyde and Jackie? Hyde and Jackie manage to keep their relationship a secret for much longer. How will this change the development of their relationship without having their friends lack of support and ridicule in the beginning?

Not complete, but it ends in a nice place. No cliffhangers here.

56k words, 16 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, background Eric/Donna

One Difference: Donna and Kelso Have a Fling by MistyMountainHop

Believing she's lost Eric forever, Donna accepts Kelso's offer to have a fun, commitment-free fling. They plan on keeping it a secret, but Jackie and Hyde's own summer secret complicates matters.

This story is complete.

32k words, 11 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Eric/Donna, Jackie/Hyde

Also Available on AO3

One Difference: Hyde Catches Jackie by MistyMountainHop

Kelso forgets to pick Jackie up from work ... again. Feeling neglected, she falls into the arms of her boss, only to be caught in a transgressive lip-lock by Steven Hyde.

This story is complete.

15k words, 4 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Also Available on AO3

One Difference: Hyde Doesn’t Lie by MistyMountainHop

Hyde tells Jackie the truth about their Veteran's Day kiss, but his choice alters their relationship — and the lives around them. One difference can change everything.

This story is complete.

12k words, 3 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Also Available on AO3

One Difference: Hyde Goes to Kelso’s Ice Shack by MistyMountainHop

Kelso plans to get Jackie back by taking her to his uncle's "fabulous" cabin in the woods. He has everything in place—the right lie, the right couple to emulate—but an unexpected variable threatens to dismantle his scheme: Steven Hyde.

This story is complete.

21k words, 5 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna

One Difference: Jackie and Hyde Don’t Kiss (During the Summer) by MistyMountainHop

With the basement to themselves, Jackie and Hyde can't seem to stay away from each other. Buried feelings rise to the surface. Jackie makes the first move, but Hyde blocks it. Rather than kissing, they end up in a chess match of escalating risks and consequences.

This story is complete.

126k words, 31 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna

Also Available on AO3

One Difference: The Answer’s Probably Yes by MistyMountainHop

In a desperate act, Hyde seeks advice from Jackie, a girl who thinks he's scum. He's not fond of her either, but she makes him a crazy yet strangely-appealing offer.

This story is complete.

60k words, 15 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna

Also Available on AO3

OPERATION: REBOUND by ShanghaiLily

I was having a lot of trouble categorizing this, since it can be considered an AU and a season 8 fix-it, but in the end I placed it on the AU category because there’s a original character involved.

Jackie & Hyde have trouble hiding their secret relationship, because a housebound & heartbroken Eric continually walks in on them while they're fooling around. Sexually frustrated, they resolve to find Eric a girlfriend to distract him so they can be alone in every way. What happens when Donna comes home and finds that Eric has moved on? Will she fight for him?

This story is complete.

65k words, 13 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna, Eric/OC.

Spur of the Moment by shy1214

What might have happened if Hyde had made a different choice and said a different thing at one point early on?

Donna is not a nice character in this story, just to let you know.

This story is a WIP

49k words, 9 chapters for now.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Tiny Dancer by ourinvisibleink

After a summer of fooling around with resident bad boy Steven Hyde, Jackie discovers that she is pregnant.

This story is a WIP. It hasn’t been updated in a few months, but I still have faith.

9k words, 5 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Trick or Treat by MistyMountainHop

Kelso invites his single friends to his brother's Halloween party. Casey's Monster Make-Out Mash-Ups are renowned for encouraging commitment-free flings. Fresh from a break-up — and pining over Kelso's girl — Hyde needs some naughty-bad fun. But Jackie is far from happy herself, despite being one-half of the only couple left in the basement.

This story is complete.

14k words, 2 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, background Eric/Donna

Also Available on AO3

Welcome to Hydeville (One Difference: Hyde Doesn’t Toss Jackie’s Bag) by MistyMountainHop

When Jackie tries to prove her coolness to Hyde, Hyde shows her just how uncool life with him would be.

This story is complete.

13k words, 6 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Also Available on AO3

You Look Like an Angel by crimsinsky

It all started with prom, but what if Hyde hadn’t immediately gone off with Pam Macy and waited to see what Jackie would do?

This story is a WIP.

22k words, 17 chapters so far.

One-shots:

A chance encounter by hanaasbananas

When Jackie rejects Kelso's serenade, she leaves the basement and the gang behind for good. Seven years later, a meeting in a bar gives birth to an unexpected friendship that could change the course of her life forever.

7k words.

Rated G.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Beats of Silence by vampy.rEVOLution666

When she was with Kelso, Jackie never experienced the passion that she always thought she would when it came to sex, so responsibility falls upon the Zen Master to show her that it can be so much better when you're with the right person. Jackie Burkhart and Steven Hyde finally go on their first date, they have their first kiss and they spend their first night together.

3k words.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Catching Up by springsteenicious

Hyde isn't exactly sure just how he ended up in a smelly ice shack staring at a notebook paper with his name written on it in Jackie's curly handwriting, but he does know that today is going to change things between them.

Or: Hyde goes to the ice shack.

3k words.

Rated G.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Communication Breakdown by springsteenicious

Donna told Jackie she didn't want a new boyfriend after Eric. Hyde offers his friendship and Donna mistakes it for more. When Donna makes a move, Hyde tells her something shocking about himself.

6k words

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna, Donna/Hyde friendship

Creepy and Unnatural?? Not at all! by HydeLuver

As usual, Hyde is the only one who can comfort a heartbroken Jackie.

1k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Fez dates Jackie by zeppelinandunicorns 

A rewrite of S3EP21. Instead of asking Donna for help with Caroline, Fez asks Jackie, making a certain burnout jealous beyond befief.

5k words

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

From the Land of Ice and Snow by MoonTickler

Blizzards in the Midwest suck at the best of times, but never as much as when Hyde and Jackie get stranded in the Vista Cruiser together, and they're forced to confess their feelings for one another, which may or may not have to do with the first kiss that neither would confess they felt anything during.

7k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, background Eric/Donna

Hyde Doesn’t Sleep With the Nurse by springsteenicious

What if Hyde hadn't slept with the nurse in "You Shook Me?" What if he and Jackie had just talked things out?

1k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

It’s Just a Kiss Away by springsteenicious

It's Veteran's Day and everything Hyde thought he knew about love is being changed. Jackie, on the other hand, is just happy to finally be with him.

2k words.

Rated G.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Little T&A by springsteenicious

Eric and Donna actually do get married, prompting Hyde to make a decision about his own relationship.

(Eric and Donna's wedding told from Jackie and Hyde's POVs)

2k words.

Rated G.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna

wouldn’t you love to love her by donutcats

And the story deviates off course yet again, because Jackie twists her mouth for a moment and then says; “Can we try that again?”

“What?”

“Can we kiss again?"

11k words.

Rated G.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Feel free to reply to this post if you think I left out a good story!

I’ll repeat this at the end of every single post (seriously, I literally copy and paste this every single time): Speaking as someone who writes, it would be really cool if you guys decide to leave a review (or a comment, if the story is on AO3) in the stories you read, especially the unfinished ones. It really motivates the authors, and receiving a compliment is always a mood lifter. I’ve seen some authors updating stories after years because of nice reviews, so… yeah, this is just an idea.

The next category is: 100% Alternative Universe stories. Will post it soon!

[doctorofmagic]

Ten short headcanons = go!

!!!

Oh... Uh... Okay...

1. Stephen can’t rest at night without a sleep spell because, even though there are tons of spells protecting the Sanctum, Nightmare and other demons are always trying to haunt his dreams, not to mention his own inner demons.

2. Illyana is Stephen’s daughter. She won’t admit it but he’s the only one truly concerned about her since Xavier is busy with, like, all the mutants around the world, and she can’t count on Magneto all the time. Cyclops is more like an older brother and he’s also busy with Logan and Jean and the rest of the Summers so yeah. Stephen invites her for dinner sometimes so he can secretly learn more about her life and check on her.

3. Stephen and Clea used to bring casual third parties to their relationship. Satana, Daimon, Logan, Matthew, Namor... Few were the heroes who escaped their thirst.

4. Victor and Stephen go out for movies in magic disguises so they can enjoy nerd stuff without being, you know, a cloaked fancy weirdo and a fearful armored king. VIctor canonically likes Star Trek so I’m guessing they pick pop culture movies.

5. T’Challa and Norrin are Stephen’s closest friends. They have... erm... colorful benefits. Norrin shares the same sensibility about life and the value of a soul, while T’Challa shares some perspectives about politics and social matters with Stephen.

6. Bats won’t go for walks by himself. He wants Stephen to take him, despite the fact that he’s a ghost and could do it on his own. Also he loves fetching, so Stephen allows his ghostly body to be tangible again.

7. Speaking of good bois... Bats is the reason Stephen survived depression. He’s always around when Stephen is having a meltdown.

8. Stephen hates Halloween. It’s the night Dormammu tries to invade Earth every year or some evil magic shenanigans are afoot. Also kids are always trying to break into the Sanctum so he uses illusions to scare them, which, deep down, brings him a smile.

9. Few people remember to send Stephen gifts on Christmas. But Wong never failed him. Not even once. Currently, Clea keeps sending alien flowers from other dimensions, which Stephen collects with everlasting spells. Victor sends lots, I mean, LOTS of literature books and other treats. Wong keeps sending fashion and special seasonings so Stephen can learn how to cook on his own. Norrin collects stardust from all over the universe, a collection that is right next to Clea’s flowers. On the other hand, Stephen forgets it’s Christmas, yet he sends them gifts the next day. Very clumsy, last minute gifts. But everyone appreciates his effort.

10. Stephen’s weakest spot is his nape and hands. I don’t make the rules. (actually, since it’s a hc, I do, but...)

PS: the picture below doesn’t tell much, I just like this panel very much...

Are these enough, anon? Bold of you to think I’d write SHORT headcanons ahahaha...

[laughingmagi]

SENSES AND OTHER ODDLY SPECIFIC HEADCANONS TAGGED BY: @youhavemyrespect TAGGING: free for all :))))

1. WHAT DOES YOUR MUSE SMELL LIKE:

Chalk, sage, cigarette smoke, lime and juniper (when he’s been drinking, mostly), but also something deeper and more primal to those who can sense it. Ozone and old temples, dragon’s blood and freshly turned earth. Generally considered his magic reek, becomes heightened during certain times of the year but especially around Halloween. Many that can smell it have called it utterly intoxicating. 

2. WHAT DOES YOUR MUSE’S HANDS FEEL LIKE:  

Soft and warm, slightly calloused at the fingers tips and sides of knuckles from drawing for hours at a time some days. Overall, they’re very nice. He hasn’t worked a conventional job in his life so he avoided wear and tear from compulsory handwashing and general labor.  

3. WHAT DOES YOUR MUSE USUALLY EAT IN A DAY:  

It depends, honestly. John can’t cook and usually eats out or orders in. He has a preference toward Indian and other Asian cuisines. John doesn’t eat much meat, but it’s not a hard or first rule. If he has the luxury not to, you know? I truly can’t go into any specifics or regularities because he doesn’t take care of himself and doesn’t have any regular eating patterns from day to day. Sometime he’ll wake up get breakfast, maybe swing by the store and buy hummus and pita for lunch, and treat himself to some vindaloo in the evening, and spend the night at a local pub. Other days he’ll barely eat if at all. Realize two days late that he’s famished. He’s a mess, honestly.

4. DOES YOUR MUSE HAVE A GOOD SINGING VOICE:

Depends on who you ask. John doesn’t have much of an opinion on it, and generally thinks it sucks. Personally, I feel it’s more knee-jerk sefl-deprecation. ‘Nah, mate, I was shite.’ Peronally in my head he tends to sound like Dave Vanien and maybe later in life closer to Nick Cave. Because I love my deep voiced spooky boys with the sonorous voices singing from the depths of their graves.

5. DOES YOUR MUSE HAVE ANY BAD HABITS OR NERVOUS TICKS:

He smokes like a chimney but aside from that, I feel like there’s a certain eeriness to his composure and stillness. Years of dealing with creatures that are painfully powerful, terrible monsters, cruel, bitter gods, has made him highly accustomed to schooling his body language and features to convey both neutrality and a kind of cocksure confidence as though to say ‘I fucking dare you’ as he banks on a reputation both earned and built upon hyperbolic rumours.

6: WHAT DOES YOUR MUSE USUALLY LOOK LIKE / WEAR:

Dark suit (either black or dark blue), tie (properly cinched, ta so very much), usually solid colours, though occasionally red and white striped, white button down or some other pale colour like blue or pink, dark oxfords flats, usually a bit worse for wear, tan trench coat/raincoat, sometimes a black, shorter coat that might be vinyl? (Idek Sean Murphy draws him in this coat and the colouring has the visual coding of a shiny fabric, and it kiiiiinda fits with my vegetarian head canon so idek). Messy hair, frequently stubbled jaw, but I don’t think he’s...slovenly. It’s very trendy now to portray John with a perpetual five o’ clock shadow, but if you refer to the art in the Vertigo series, he’s predominately drawn clean shaven so. I mean. *gestures* Although, I’ll also freely imagine him to one of those guys that has a fast growing beard like he should probably shave a couple times a day.

7. IS YOUR MUSE AFFECTIONATE? HOW MUCH? HOW SO:

Yeah, but it’s a thing that he’s had to struggle with over the years. He grew up with very little affection. Like, yes, Cheryl did what she could, but I think as he grew older, and started acting out more, not to mention her leaving home first being considerably older than John, I think he could be hard to love and frankly still is. So he’s terribly affection hungry and I do believe his promiscuity is part of it. Like, listen, he’s a handsome, charming man, and for him it’s easier to connect with his sexuality more than vulnerable sincerity. Not to say he isn’t ever able to emotionally connect. I think that comes part and parcel just as well. Hey, have I mentioned he’s a mess. He’s just the mess of contradictions in so many ways. He’s guarded, he’s vulnerable, he’s lonely, he’s a loner, he’s hard, but deeply empathetic and kind (I said what I said). All that being said when he is close to someone, when they are intimate, and it’s deep and loving, then oh yes, he is extremely affectionate. 

8. WHAT POSITION DOES YOUR MUSE SLEEP IN:

Side or back, when with someone, he usually sleeps tucked up against them as some kinda spoon. 

9: COULD YOU HEAR YOUR MUSE IN THE HALLWAY FROM ANOTHER ROOM:

Depends on if he wants to be heard.

[naturepointstheway]

Frozen - Domestic Assassin (Crack AU) Masterpost

This is a Masterpost of all the fanfiction I’d written (all on Tumblr) based in @ultranos’ Domestic Assassin crack AU which was hilarious for a fairly good-sized group of us! And from what I”ve seen in my notifications, people are still enjoying and finding fics of mine in this AU even to this day, which is great! 

I’ve basically dug into my previous fanfiction pages and pulled them out year by year, so because it’ll be way too much work to try and arrange everything by title, I just went by year. At least Tumblr keeps the links when I copy and paste. 

Since there are so many, you’ll find them under the cut. Enjoy! 

Pre-2016

Air Mattress Prompt  

An exhausted Anna returns home from a hot night with Kristoff only to accidentally make her sister fly off the air mattress when she flops down on it for a sleep.

“Am I supposed to be alarmed by the moon tonight?” prompt 

Elsa is so exhausted she gets confused between the sun and moon apparently.

“Can we please stop fighting and talk about the koala in your room?” 

Elsa adopted a koala, much to Anna’s exasperation.

“Can you pull this fake cobweb across the door?” Halloween prompt 

Anna wants to play a prank on Elsa...

Cell Block Sniper (M - violence and strong language)

Yes. Yes. It’s a crossover. A crossover between “Cell Block Tango” song from Chicago and this AU.

“Do you realise what this means?” “That you’re a really bad shot?” 

Elsa is NOT having the best of time trying to instruct a new trainee.

Domestic Assassin AU prompt: Hans’ POV (pre-reveal) 

Hans has a visit from Elsa when he dumps Anna. 

“Don’t touch that!” (Healthcare writing prompt, Snow Sisters) 

Elsa was bound to fall out of a tree at some point and end up in hospital. Anna takes care of her. 

Elsa and Weselton prompt 

Elsa refuses to let Weselton in the door.

Eyes That Glisten 

Anna knows how to persuade Elsa to do whatever she wants. 

“God you’re such a grumpy bags in the morning aren’t you?” 

Elsa is not a happy camper after a long night where everything just goes wrong. “Holy shit. Most realistic Dementor costume ever.” Halloween prompt 

Turns out, Elsa just looks like that most of the time.

“I can’t help being a geek about my vital signs!” prompt (Elsarik) 

A crossover between another AU (Shardsverse) 

“I don’t think I should tell you what we’re dressed as.” (Halloween Prompt) 

Somebody think of the children! 

“I dropped my cookie :’(” 

Elsa cries when she drops her cookie. 

“I feel like a T-Rex” 

Anna is too lazy to just grab the goddamn stepladder and get the jam herself.

“I wish I could drive you out of my life with a sword!” (Hans and Anna, prompt) 

Anna is NOT a fan of Hans...

“Maybe you should go as an assassin. Oh wait, you already are one.” (Halloween prompt) 

Anna is a sarcastic little sister to Elsa.

“No one unfollows like Gaston!” 

Anna overhears Gaston boasting about how he unfollowed someone because of a disability. She is not happy.

Ruined Dinner Party

After an hour of waiting for her sister to come to the party, Anna finally spots her with “ketchup” all over her top. 

Part 2 of “Ruined Dinner Party”

Of course it wasn’t ketchup. Duh. Anna is NOT HAPPY.

Sleepyhead (drabble, Snow Sisters) 

Elsa, going to the kitchen for midnight munchies, spots Anna sprawled on a couch, textbooks all around her. 

“So. Many. Triangles. Help me here!” 

Anna, not being a maths-y person, gets frustrated with geometry, and Elsa offers to help. 

“So you’re going as yourself for Halloween.” Halloween prompt 

Elsa is not keen on dressing up as Halloween.

“Tell our parents my Tumblr URL and I swear I will make your death look like an accident” prompt. 

Elsa practically threatens Anna when the latter demands to explain her Tumblr URL (of course she quickly forgives her little sis.) 

“That mask is all kinds of creepy. I like it.” Halloween prompt 

Elsa practically shits herself when Anna scares her while wearing a terrifying mask. 

Things you said at 4am prompt 

Anna gets a call at 4am on her phone from Elsa, who accidentally sniped the wrong guy..

Those Poor Birds 

Elsa mistakes a pair of birds’ mating antics as fighting, much to Anna’s amusement.

“Wait, you’re yelling at a movie?” (Snow Sisters, writing prompt) 

Elsa is very confused to find that Anna’s yelling from the lounge is at a movie. Not at an invader.

“Was it really necessary to shoot my pumpkin carving?” (Halloween prompt) 

Anna is NOT happy when Elsa decides to use her pumpkin carving for shooting practice.

“What do you mean it’s a sunset…?” prompt 

Elsa wakes up only to find that it’s already after sunset, not sunrise.

“What the hell? You gave out alcoholic chocolate to trick-or-treating kids?!” (Halloween prompt) 

Anna discovers that her German chocolates had been opened by Elsa, who’d handed them out to kids. 

“Where did you leave the spare copy of that book?” (Elsarik DA!verse, prompt) 

Crossing over with another writer’s AU with her OC, Alarik. Elsa can’t find that one specific book she needs, and she’s sure Alarik has it. 

“You once asked me what I’d do if I had only one day left.” prompt 

Anna will most definitely NOT be spending that final day of her life with Hans.

“You did what?!” prompt (Elsa and Kristoff) 

Elsa does not appreciate Kristoff’s concern over her having WAY too many cats for one house.

“You mean a line segment.” prompt 

Elsa is a huge geometry nerd, even waiting in line for takeaways.

“You should go as an assassin. Oh wait. You already are one.” prompt 

Another one where Anna suggests Elsa goes as an assassin for Halloween, only to be all “oh wait, you are one.” 

2016

Accidental shooting

Elsa accidentally shoots someone she did not mean to shoot in a library’s basement. 

Amuse Me

Elsa’s having one of those blah days and Anna’s there with bad puns all ready to go.

“Bittersweet and Strange” (not based on a prompt)

Elsa explains exactly how she likes her coffee to Anna. Turns out Elsa is also a huge fan of marmite. 

“Can’t I at least take this baby koala home?”

Anna, no, you cannot take a koala home from Australia, no matter how cute it is.

Cat Gallery (not based on a prompt)

Kristoff discovers Elsa’s huge photo album of her cats. 

“Did you lose your main point…”

Anna hears something about money and bills and wait what now.

“Do nurses ever fall asleep on the night shift?”

Anna visits Elsa in hospital and inevitably someone has to wonder this. Elsa’s adorbs when she’s pouty and Anna can’t help but annoy her on this count.

Fight Me

One sister challenges another to a fun boxing game. 

“How did you get these bruises?”

A crossover with another writer’s canon OC, Alarik (”Elsarik”) where he asks how she got some bruises while on the job. 

“How many cats are in bed with you?”

Anna marvels that there are nine cats in bed with Elsa. 

“I don’t think you’re supposed to have the whole packet at once.”

Do not eat a whole bag of coffee. Do not.

I Have Found My People (not based on a prompt)

Elsa has discovered that certain Scandinavian countries drink the most coffee in the world and wants to migrate there right now.

“I know you don’t want this but it’s for your own good…”

Kristoff is rightly concerned when he finds that Elsa had thirty cups of coffee in 48 hours. Do not do this at home.

“I, uh, kinda dropped it in the water.”

Elsa calls Anna to tell her there’s an emergency: she dropped her wallet in the sea and all the fish now have her personal information. 

“I want a Venusian day…”

Elsa tries to explain to Anna why she would not want to live on Venus. Anna doesn’t give a fuck. More hours in the day what’s not to love about that?

Of Cat’s Paws and Adopting Stellar Systems (not based on a prompt)

Elsa is enthralled by a photo of the Cat’s Paw Nebula she has found on the laptop. 

Of Monkeying Around and Going Ape (not based on a prompt)

Anna comes home to discover that Elsa has adopted a monkey that had been neglected by its owner. Even Anna is almost (I said, ALMOST) tempted to keep the monkey but her common sense reigns. 

“Oh so you were in my bed this whole time?” (nsfw)

Dontcha hate when you’re in the middle of coitus and your goddamn cat has to interrupt you? (Elsarik, with another Frozen writer’s (@patricia-von-arandel) OC for Elsa)

“Once we start tickling, we can’t stop!” (nsfw)

Another steamy one with an old abandoned OC of mine (Jannike), where they find themselves having a quickie while the boss is away. 

Rubbish Day (not based on a prompt)

Anna is horrified to find a rubbish bag gone and trails of what suspiciously looks like blood leading outside. Turns out some meat thrown in there leaked inside.

“The best way to get rid of your ex…”

Anna didn’t think that Hans Westerguard would ever end up on Elsa’s targets to “take care of”. Until he does.

The One Time Elsa Caught Anna “Studying” (not based on a prompt)

Anna uses the mirror in the bathroom to practice distinguishing teeth for a medical exam. Elsa suggests alternatives. 

“What is this owl doing in our bathroom?”

Of course Elsa would adopt an owl and want to keep it in the bathroom. Of course.

“Who dances in the rain anyway?”

Elsa comes home to discover Anna dancing in the rain. 

“Why is there an otter in our kitchen?”

Anna comes home to find that Elsa has “adopted” an otter from a “client”. As you do.

“Why would you wish to be at a backpackers?”

Elsa and Alarik (Shards AU, Elsarik) decide to stay at a backpackers together for some private time. 

“Yes, yes the cold doesn’t bother you…”

Anna is not impressed with Elsa standing in the snow when she has a major cold.

2017

The Blood of White Men (not based on a prompt)

As Elsa’s favourite song goes, he had it comin’ all along. 

Is the Earth Broken? (not based on a prompt)

Elsa is confused about why the day she thought it was today...actually isn’t. She convinces herself the Earth has somehow broked. 

“It won’t be high tide you said…”

Elsa needs to learn that reading yesterday’s newspaper’s high tide times is not helpful. 

Kittens on Saturn (not based on a prompt)

Elsa hopes there’s actual giant kittens on Saturn after seeing a graphic manipulation on an astronomy news site.

Of Singing Humpback Whales and Rock Trolls

Kristoff visits Elsa in hospital while Anna’s busy with other things. It...does not go as expected. Poor Kristoff. 

“Proboscis Monkeys look ridiculous…”

Anna’s exasperation at Elsa rescuing a Proboscis monkey is still not so great that she can’t help but wonder what would happen if you honked their nose. Anna NO. 

“She’s going to kill you.”

Kristoff knows his days are numbered when he spills carrot juice all over Elsa’s brand new rifle. Uh oh.

“There’s a perfectly good reason for all these kittens.”

Turns out Elsa decided to adopt some kittens left on the side of the road when they’re already over-run with cats.

“This is extreme, even for you.”

Elsa is so addicted to her coffee she’s begun pouring them into wine bottles, as you do.

2018

Elsa brings home a parrot 

Anna discovers that Elsa has “rescued” a very large, very loud parrot from one of her, ahem, “clients”.

Elsa’s Back Up Cat, Mushu 

Anna discovers one of the cats apparently reading a book, and much to her consternation, Elsa explains he’s for back up.

“Oh what a circus!” photo prompt 

Anna takes her still-bewildered-after-five-coffees sister to the circus. This may or may not turn out to be a great idea.

[plum-pudding-and-honey]

MONTHLY RANGE : Eight & Charley

Storm Warning - 3.5/5 : the plot is not the best thing I've ever seen but it's still a good introduction story for Eight on audio and to be fair it just made me want to drop everything and hop after him. I like Charley's background but I really just can't stand her. I don't hate her, she's interesting and I totally understand that people love her but I've never really warmed up to her. I also have a problem with the "classic" format : 4 episodes of 20-30 minutes which, sure, allows the writers to give the story and the characters more development, but which I find particularly long. I just find it very hard to focus for two hours, unless the story is very compelling

Sword of Orion - 3/5 : (god this is loooong) The atmosphere was interesting, so was Deeva (although I thought her being an android was quite obvious but wtv). The other side characters were all quite boring though and I couldn't bring myself to care about them. The android/human war was also an interesting point, it's a shame it didn't get developed more than that

The Stones of Venice - 1.5/5 : Oh my God do I hate this. Two hours which felt more like six hours of whining and complaining and "Estella, my beloved, forgive me here" and in the end, I'm not even sure whether I want to kill the Duke or myself. Just... zero empathy for this guy and Estella. Pietro was a bit more interesting although fish gondoliers who have evolved to survive the sinking of the city? Really? No. (Not just because evolution doesn't happen over a hundred years. Try a million.) Churchwell was equally annoying (I mean, as a librarian, I'm all for art preservation but have some decency here man) and the cult, well I've got no opinion whatsoever on them, that's how useless they are in all of this. The only thing that kinda made this thing worthwhile was this bit of conversation between the Doctor, Charley and that gondolier guy about the Duke waiting a hundred years for Estella and how Charley points out how long it is waiting for someone to return and how Eight DID wait a hundred years before seeing Fitz again and I'm not okay about this (and this was released shortly after Escape Velocity was published so I'm definitely gonna take this as a Fitz reference fight me on this)

Minuet in Hell - 3/5 : The Doctor being imprisoned and amnesiac for 3/4 of the episode was very looong. I liked the interactions with Gideon Crane but since the viewer already knows which one is the real Doctor, I really didn't see the point of making this last for so long. Also it robbed us of more Eight/Brig time and that's a shame. And those American accents are just horrible, I couldn't understand most of what Dale and the Senator were saying. The vilains and the Psi (psy?) machine were kinda interesting (although they also sounded pretty annoying) but in two hours and a half, they really could have been developed a bit more. Same goes for Becky Lee and her supernatural hunter gig that was way underused. The Brigadier is a huge asset, let's be honest. And the EDAs are canon in the BF universe, so that's that. (yes there was a Fitz reference in The Stones of Venice, I will not shut up)

Invaders from Mars - 2/5 : I love the idea behind this episode : the panic caused by Orson Welles' reading of the War of the Worlds, a false invasion in fact hiding a real invasion. It could have been great. But it's not. First, those accents and voices, again NO. For a medium that relies only on sounds, it's  really a big issue here (I mean how are you supposed to take the alien invaders seriously with those voices???). Mark Gatiss loves the Ice Warriors and we've seen with the Empress of Mars that he can write decent episodes with them so why didn't he use them here? It could have been so creepy (which, for a Halloween episode, would have been neat). Instead he gives us a cheap version of invaders, a nazi guy, Russians and an atomic bomb, and mobsters. And it's too much, it's too confusing, it's too many characters. It's a mess. The Doctor is adorable playing private detective but then he accidentally reveals his plan to the bad guys (I mean...) and the aliens are killed by the Russian guy everybody thought to be dead and his atomic bomb : no, that's bullshit. Also, bury your gays : totally gratuitous and unnecessary (what was even the point?). Yeah, huge disappointment.

The Chimes of Midnight - 6/5 : cHriStmAs wOuLdN't bE cHriStmAs wiThOuT oNe oF mY pLuM puDdiNgS (tfbgvfgtv) Finally something GOOD. Eight is at his best sassfull self, the different parts are well articulated, it's funny and creepy at the same time and the paradox surrounding Charley is well exploited. Robert Shearman even succeeded in making me care about Charley. Edith is touching, even the other characters are, and that ending is really nicely done and coherent. I also really like how Eight is depicted here, especially in his relationship to Charley (and his companions in general). He really cares about her and yet he doesn't tell her the truth, he's been lying to her ever since Storm Warning because he selfishly hopes that if he doesn't speak about it, it's all gonna go away, just like he will do later with Lucie and her auntie Pat and that's Eight in all his glory : he loves his companions but he's got this kind of superiority complex that makes him think he knows better than them and which makes him treat them like shit more often than not (and ok, Charley gets a lot of crap from him). They are all aware of that, as we are, and yet they still love him and we still love him and I don't even know why.

Seasons of Fear - 3.5/5 : The format was interesting, the change of scenery for each episode really helped to not lose interest in the story. I also liked Grayle, he's an interesting villain but the immortality thing could have been handled a bit better in my opinion, especially the losing your loved ones part. I actually liked Charley there and her varied suggestions to get rid of Grayle. The mystery around her thickens and I did not remember that ending! The Nimons were a bit unexpected but ok I guess. But I found the conclusion very disappointing, too easy.

Embrace the Darkness - 4/5 : I love the atmosphere of this one, especially the beginning : the "something touches you in the dark and you realise it's not your friend" trope is classic but the audio only aspect of the thing gives it something more (especially of you listen to it in the dark). Like the previous one, I liked the pace (it didn't feel like this thing would never end which is something worth mentioning). The fact that there aren't too many characters also helps a lot. And I can't help myself to compare it with Sword of Orion : the settings are similar, it's a huis-clos, and they're both written by Nick Briggs. I find Embrace the Darkness much better, the characters are actually likeable (and they all don't die at the end, quite the opposite) and interesting. The Cimmerians were also nicely done and I really liked how different senses are brought into focus here, how the viewer is brought closer to the characters because they can't see. Hearing becomes central then but taste and touch are also prominent (I especially liked the way the Cimmerians share their history with the Doctor and Charley). The Doctor is well-written (I love his "conversations" with Rosum) and this tendency to self pity himself every time he makes a mistake is very Eight (Orbis). 

The Time of the Daleks -  2.5/5 : The first part was good. And then it got so confusing, I actually lost the plot several times because my mind kept drifting away. There are way too many comings and goings through those portals, too many side characters that weren't interesting in the least. Learman's motivations as a villain are ridiculous (she wants to kill Shakespeare to be the only one who remembers him because everyone else is too stupid to understand his works... yeah, right).

Neverland -  4.5/5 : Zagreus sits inside your head, Zagreus lives among the dead, Zagreus sees you in your bed and eats you when you're sleeping (sorry I had to put it). So … yeah, that was breath-taking. That was an amazing conclusion for Charley's arc, the neverpeople are pretty cool and Romana and Rassillon are a nice little treat. The plot is coherent and the two hours and a half passed very quickly which is always worth mentioning. About Eight and Charley, now. As I said, I'm not a fan of Charley : I find her too perfect (and I just can't stand how she speaks, I know it's kinda shallow but when her voice is the only thing you get out of her, that becomes kind of a big deal) and I really don't ship her with Eight (although I recognise that they might be romantically involved, a lot like Ten and Rose, I simply choose to not see it). That being said, I liked how she stood up to the Doctor at the beginning, how she called him out on his bullshit ("Happy Birthday, Charley! Happy Birthday, he says. Only it isn't my birthday. It isn't my birthday because I'm not supposed to have any more birthdays") and used the TARDIS against him. I also liked her comparison with Peter Pan because, yeah, that's the Doctor, she gets it. I understand why she asked him to shoot her at the end but I don't think she was fair asking him to do it because she knows, everybody knows, that he won't do it. He won't do it for someone he despises, so Charley? Nope. And yeah, her dying was the obvious solution, I get that,  but that's the epitome of everything I don't like about her. Charley Pollard, always making the right decision even if it means sacrificing herself, Charley Pollard always nice and caring and clever and adventurous, and in a way she reminds me of Rose (although Rose was a jerk to Mickey) and I hate Rose. As for the Doctor... Finally he gets the consequences of his actions and yet you can't help but feel sorry for him. Because like Charley said he’s sweet and he truly thinks what he’s doing is good. And that cliff-hanger! I AM BECOME ZAGREUS! YES BABY. In conclusion, it’s a great episode, regardless of my feelings towards Charley

Zagreus -  4/5 : Let's be honest, the first time I listened to it, I hated it with all my guts (and I also fell asleep at some point in the middle), so I wasn't really looking forward to giving it another chance. But I'm glad I did. This time I really took the time to listen to it properly and knowing roughly where this was going, I loved it? I mean ok, this thing is more than three hours (not gonna lie, this was really difficult for me) and it's completely bonkers and WTF but there IS a certain coherence to the thing that I hadn't picked on the first time I listened to it. So, let's start with the obvious : Zagreus/the Doctor/Paul McGann giving us the performance of his life. He's GREAT and if I didn't already love him I would certainly after this. He's creepy and disturbing as Zagreus (he slapped Charley!!) and his voice when he's the Doctor, when he begs Charley to kill him ... yeah, I was dying inside there. By the way, I liked the parallel with Neverland and Charley begging the Doctor to kill her, except that she actually does it. The Brigadier/TARDIS was equally brilliant. I got a lot of the Doctor's Wife vibes here - except that the TARDIS is evil and HATES the companions, and her conversation with the Doctor, her fit of jealousy was brilliantly done. I also loved the bits with Five, Six and Seven (except it's not really them but it actually is) and they were hilarious when they're working together towards the end (Tweedledee, Tweedledum and Tweedle-ego). It was a nice hommage to Alice in Wonderland, coherent until the end (and let's be honest the bit with Schrodinger's cat only it's the Doctor who is in the box? Brilliant. Again.) And as an anniversary episode, it worked for me. I probably didn't get all the references but I picked up a few of them and it was nice to include the BF cast, even if it wasn't in their usual roles.

Overall opinion : This is not as bad as I remembered. I postponed relistening to these for a long time because I remembered it way worse than it actually is (in my defence, I listened to those episode some 8 years ago when my English wasn't so fluent). I still don't like the classic format because most of the episodes feel reaaaaally long and I'm not a fan of Charley. I did like her arc though, it was interesting to  explore the fixed in time events and the consequences of the Doctor kicking the laws of time in the nuts, way before Ten. The resolution of this arc was also brilliant in my opinion with the anti-time and the Time Lords/Rassillon mythology. The quality is fluctuant : the Stones of Venice, Invaders from Mars and the Time of the Daleks being the bottom of the barrel while the Chimes of Midnight, Embrace the Darkness and Neverland/Zagreus are amazing. And Eight changes so much through his life : he's so hopeful and sweet and utterly optimistic, a drastic difference from the Time War series (which I just finished before listening to this) where, although his core qualities are still there, deep down, he's lost so much and been through so much crap from everyone. I don't know if any other Doctor went through that much (War Doctor excluded) tbh. His relationship to his companions is also quite unique I think, maybe I'll write something about that one day. Now for the Divergent Universe arc, which I don't remember fondly either. Let's see if I change my mind as well.

[ronweasleyisourking]

A Response to “Why Harry & Hermione Should Be Together”, a YouTube Video by the Super Carlin Brothers

First, there are some things that I want to get out of the way:

I harbor no hatred towards Jonathon and Ben or any members of the Super Carlin Brother team and this is not meant as a reason for anyone to leave hate comments on their videos or social media. I have been a fan of theirs for several years now and am simply using their video to get my opinions on the matter out there.

I am all for letting people have their own opinions and people shipping whatever they want, with a couple exceptions such as pedophilia and incest, neither of which is the case here. This is not meant to make Harry/Hermione fans feel attacked or excluded. Again, I am just using the reasons stated in defense of Harmione in this video to create a list of reasons of why I, personally, am against them being together. 

Some quotes might be slightly misquoted due to very quick annotations on my part, but I believe the meaning of the quotes stayed the same.

The video starts out with Ben wanting to get a few things out of the way before getting on to his reasons on why Harry and Hermione should be together and those things were: “Hermione is, like, whatever comes, like, one steo above queen.”, Movie Ginny, and horrible Harry/Ginny moments in the movies which honestly instantly put me into fight or flight mode because while he explains that he doesn’t know if the movies are affecting his judgement, I could tell right away that a lot of the reasons were going to boil down to the movies. 

Then he moves on to his reasons which in summary are: Harry and Hermione are really great friends, Harry and Ginny came out of nowhere, Ron and Hermione fight a lot, and he ships Ron and Luna. Below, I will discuss each of these reasons and my thoughts on it. 

Reason #1: “Harry and Hermione are just really good friends who get along and work well together.” 

Sure, they’re great friends, I’ll give you that, but let me show you how they act when Ron isn’t around: 

Deathly Hallows, Chapter 16 Godric's Hollow, pages 311 and 312

Now let’s get to his actual reasoning

“In the first book it seems like that’s what they’re setting you up for anyway.”

Interesting take, I wonder why he thinks this.

“Ron is straight up mean to Hermione all the way up to Halloween.”

Oh, really, an eleven year old was mean to another eleven/twelve year old and then they became friends. How odd. That never happens in real life. (Note the sarcasm.) And I wonder, was Harry friends with her before Halloween? *thinks back on book* Hmm, nope. 

“...Extremely touching moment right before Harry has to go through and face down Quirrel.”

Philosopher’s Stone, Chapter 16 Through the Trapdoor, pages 286 and 287

Listen, if I thought one of my friends was about to die, I don’t need to be their  soulmate to say something nice to them before I may never see them again. Plus, they’re eleven and twelve at this point, and even if Hermione did have a crush on him then, that doesn’t mean they belong together.

“It’s not like the rest of the books are just littered with confessions of admiration. I think it’s just overall the way these two would treat each other, like, it comes with so much more respect, it feels like.”

Friends can respect each other.

“It seems like all the time, she’s throwing her arms around him, like a big hug whenever she sees him.”

I feel like a lot of the hugs are movie scenes but also friends can show physical affection, hugs do not mean someone likes you. 

“She’s like kinda low-key super interested in Harry’s love life.”

This was about Cho and Hermione’s interest in Harry and Cho’s friendship/relationship but I’ve had complete strangers interested in my love life, let alone my friend’s interest, it does not mean any of them liked me. 

I didn’t get a direct quote on these next two, but he goes off on a tangent about Krum and Hermione (which I do not even want to talk about) and ended it with his theory that Hermione only went to the Yule Ball with Krum to make Harry jealous and backs it up with zero proof - unless you count stating that Krum is also a seeker is great evidence, which I do not.

He also brings up the fact that Hermione helps Harry with the summoning charm before the first task in Goblet of Fire but Ron let Harry practice the stunning spell on him repeatedly before the third task so... I’m just saying if we’re going to base ships off people helping Harry with a task, we have better options.

Honestly, a lot of evidence in the video for Hermione and Harry was speculation about Hermione liking Harry and very little on whether Harry liked Hermione, which matters just as much, and we know for a fact that he didn’t:

Deathly Hallows, Chapter 19 The Silver Doe, page 378

Reason # 2: “Harry and Ginny, I guess are, like, fine, but it’s this thing that’s, like, lightly introduced where Ginny has a crush on him in book two and then it sort of evaporates and doesn’t exist at all until it comes on full bore in book six and it kind of feels, like, shoehorned in.”

This reason is given little evidence, other than a theory that Hermione was “eliminating the biggest threat” by telling Ginny to date other guys, which is just weird. 

The build up of Harry and Ginny’s friendship and eventual relationship is subtle but amazing and I really suggest you check out @hillnerd​ ‘s post on it here because they explain the build up better than I ever could.

Reason #3: “Ron and Hermione fight... a lot.”

Disclaimer: A lot of these quotes are less about them fighting and more about Ben trying to discredit Ron and Hermione.

“It’s not that I don’t like Hermione and Ron together, like, I would say they’re a 95 out of 100, it works pretty good, but I’m here to say that Harry and Hermione are a straight up one hundo out of one hundo. Okay, maybe not a one hundo out of one hundo but at least a 96 and when did Hermione ever settle for one point lower than she possible could have on a quiz.”

Relationships are not a quiz that can be graded and Hermione did not settle for Ron, this is just a horrible argument. 

“Hermione and Ron, they don’t exactly always share the same kind of intimate friendship.”

Order of the Phoenix, Chapter 23 Christmas on the Closed Ward, page 503

He specifically uses this book excerpt to back up his point, stating that Hermione’s responses to gifts prove that she likes Harry better than Ron - when in truth, she just likes Harry’s gift better. 

“...Yule Ball though, let’s actually talk about that because I feel like it’s a really great example of Ron not noticing Hermione.” 

Goblet of Fire, Chapter 22 The Unexpected Task, page 400

“He’s only just now realizing that she is someone that he either is or even could be romantically interested in.”

I just want to point out that at this point, Ron is fourteen, and fourteen year olds, at least in my experience, are not the smartest. Yes, he was being a bit of git in this scene, thinking that just because Hermione was a girl and their friend, she should go with one of them, and thinking that it’s impossible she could have gotten a date on her own - but he obviously knew she was a girl. And yeah, maybe he is just realizing that he could be attracted to her, but fourteen isn’t a weird age to begin recognizing attraction. 

Ron and Hermione have a great relationship, and yes, in a lot of the text, they are fighting. But we should not forget that Harry is narrating the books and we don’t get to see the entirity of their relationship. Of course he’s narrating about their fights - that’s the part of their friendship/relationship that effects him.

“Secret” Reason #4: “I think that Ron should have ended up with Luna.”

I can see some of the reasoning for this because there is a little bit of evidence of Luna maybe liking Ron in Order of the Phoenix, but I don’t think we see anything that would suggest Ron liking Luna, which again, is also important. And he gives no reason why he thinks Ron and Luna would have been better suited for each other.

Finally, Ben’s concluding point was 

“And you know what, if I’m reading too much into the books which maybe we do, the movies go out of their way to reinforce the idea.”

This concluding statement is basically my earlier fear coming true, when in the end, all the reasons boiled down to a montage of scene of Harry and Hermione in the movies, which let’s be honest, were basically just Steve Kloves’ Harmione fanfiction.

I’m going to be honest, I watched this video all the way through twice, and I found the reasoning weak and not at all convincing. You can ship whatever you want - even Harry and Hermione - but that doesn’t mean it would work in actual canon. 

[livlepretre]

What about 22, 25 with regards to SWBS and 26 and 31?

22. Do you enjoy making OCs for your fanfics, or prefer sticking to canon characters? 

Pretty much stick to canon characters! The only time I use OCs are pretty much when I need randos for brief things-- random witches, victims, hybrids... they’re pretty much single scene props. I prefer figuring out an unexpected place to use canon characters rather than OCs if possible. 

25. What scene in [Fanfic Name] took the longest to write? What was difficult about it? 

Has to have been the entirety of chapter 12. What a clusterfuck. I went through like 5 different drafts of that chapter, which was frustrating, because the point of SWBS being a break fic is that I try to write each chapter basically in one go and not judge anything too harshly and just have fun and write bonkers things and hit publish without revising for anything much more than typos. THAT SCENE THOUGH. I had drafts where Elena told Klaus she was pregnant with a magic baby and Klaus laughed in her face. Scenes where she told him and he thought she was crazy. Scenes where he’s blatantly jealous and not hiding it. It took forever to realize that 1) she wouldn’t tell him right off the bat and 2) Klaus would be hiding his jealousy. It was only later that I realized that actually Klaus is in love with Elena and he knows it and he’s hiding it-- would have been nice to have a clearer idea of their emotions when writing their first meeting after he returns! Because I literally had no idea what I should do until I did it. 

26. Are titles for your stories easy to come up with?

Honestly this part is never too bad for me, primarily because I am so quick to stick stupid titles on things (Fairytale Ending strikes me as stupid, but I thought it was oh so funny and oh so witty when I was 21; Love Bites is also along these lines, but it was punny so I went and labelled it without second-guessing myself). The Quick and The Dead is probably the only fic with a title like this that I’m actually pleased with. 

I would say I’m probably happiest with the titles I ripped from song lyrics-- After the Fire, But Before the Flood and (The Stars Were Brightly Shining). But that could be lyric association making me think they’re stronger than they are. 

31. What was the development process of [Fanfic Name] like?

Is this ask for SWBS? So, this was my Christmas fic I started last year. I wanted to write a Christmas fic in a very general sense, like I had a Halloween fic, and I started thinking: well, what are some essential elements of Christmas? And the things that struck me, and amused me terribly, were: the idea of the virgin birth, or in this case, the birth of a child conceived without a father, and the need for renewed hope as represented by that child. I immediately realized this would be an hilarious opportunity for Elena to become pregnant with Klaus’s child and for everyone to assume it’s a miracle baby and not realize it’s actually just a hybrid baby. 

Honestly figuring out the mechanics of when and how to set the story set up a lot of the rest of the plot-- I tinkered with the timeline, realized that this would mean keeping Elena human in season 4, ie her senior year of high school, and figured out about when she and Klaus might hook up to make it happen... in rewatching season 3 to prepare for writing this fic, I realized that Elena is incredibly isolated for a huge part of it, cut out from all the plotting and treated very poorly. Perfect recipe for her to hook up with Klaus. Everything just really flowed from there-- I changed a few events here or there to make them more horrifying (like Meredith actually dying) and played up Elena’s sense of solitude and depression. It was in that process that I realized how lonely Klaus himself is. I always try in each of my fics to come up with a different angle that would bring Klaus and Elena together, and in this fic, it’s their loneliness and realizing that they are kindred spirits, and might find relief in each other’s arms. 

[apathetic-revenant]

What are your Bottom 5 episodes of Gravity Falls?

huh, interesting…I never really thought of that, at least not quite in that way. but I guess there are episodes I like less than others.

although, I feel I should put a disclaimer on the top of this, that like…even the GF episodes I like the least, I still like way more than a lot of TV. even when I dislike something about this show it tends to come out of a place of “aww man, I know you guys can do better than that” than RAAAAAAAAGEEEEE or anything.

but okay, let’s see:

1. The Stanchurian Candidate. this episode bothers me a lot, tbh. there’s more on that here but in a nutshell: usually GF is really good at handling the balance between dark humor and genuine emotional consequences, but that episode kinda fumbled it. I mean, there is a lot of great character stuff in there for Stan, but that’s actually part of the problem, because it’s like the episode wants to have both this nuanced and sympathetic look at Stan BUT it also wants to play up the moral ambiguity and casual suffering for laughs like GF usually does. so basically what you wind up with there is Stan being put through the wringer right when the episode has set us up to feel really bad for him, so it’s not funny it’s just hard to watch, and everyone involved comes off as a thoughtless jerk and never really gets called on it. and Ford’s involvement also really bothers me; I know it’s Ford and he very often doesn’t think things through, and his casually entrusting children with dangerous artifacts is a running gag/character trait, but I just can’t help but feel like after everything he went through with Bill and his own paranoia, he should be way less casual about the use of mind control. especially on his own brother. what the hell, man.

2. Roadside Attraction. I get where they were going with that and it does have some stuff going for it, but I just feel like they really fumbled the moral there. I mean, I remember the first time I watched it I actually thought “oh cool, they’re going to do a moral about how pickup artists suck and don’t treat women/girls as objects that you can put niceness coins into to get affection back” and all that sort of thing…but instead it just came across as “never be friendly to anyone or everyone will hate you”. it winds up being seriously uncomfortable to watch Dipper have to apologize TO CANDY at the end because she pushed him into a situation he made it clear he didn’t want and then got upset when it didn’t go how she wanted…again, I know what they were TRYING to do there but it just felt like it wound up giving out some really uncomfortable relationship morals to its audience.

it also just bothers me from a pacing standpoint. I know they said they wanted to have some levity before the finale, but it just feels weird being there. you have this slow build up of tension throughout the latter half of the season, the sense of something dark building on the horizon, and then LIGHTHEARTED ROADTRIP EPISODE and then okay now back to the tension. plus it’s just kind of hilariously weird that the episode before that is all focused on making the Shack safe from Bill, and having accomplished that against all odds and earned a brief respite, everyone immediately runs away from the Shack. c'mon guys. c'mon.

3. The Last Mabelcorn. this one is kind of odd here because there’s a lot of great stuff in it, lots of great character stuff and plot stuff and funny stuff and it just…it could have been really great. it very nearly was really great. but I feel like they fumbled it at the last minute. I just don’t like the ultimate reveal with the unicorns. it bothers me for a lot of reasons, which probably deserve their own post. one where I’m not trying to hurry up and finish so I can go make tea and also one where the code is working properly (what are you DOING tumblr), but, uh…yeah. yeah.

4. Fight Fighters. now, don’t get me wrong, I love the video game tropes and references and that beautiful pixel animation as much as anyone. but after seeing someone pick apart some of the problems with the whole setup of Dipper being pressured into the fight and to ‘be a man’…yeah, I can’t really disagree with that. it’s awkward and it sucks and it just feels like it’s reinforcing some ideas about masculinity that don’t need to be reinforced. I feel like there is some saving grace there in that Rumble himself kind of also demonstrates a lot of the problems with those ideas (he sees everything as a fight and in real life terms this is actually just dangerous and pointlessly violent and causes more problems for everyone) but in the end it’s just uncomfortable to see everyone telling Dipper that if someone challenges you to a fight you either Take Your Beating Like A Man or you’re a coward. especially since we already went over something very similar to that in Dipper vs. Manliness and it turned out way better that time.

5. Little Gift Shop of Horrors. see, now, I don’t even dislike this one really. it’s okay. and it does have some subtle but good character stuff with Stan and claymation, which is always great. but I had to pick five, so…this one just feels weird because it’s so suspended from the rest of the show. I mean, what exactly is happening? Bottomless Pit at least had a framing device, but this is just kind of…there? it’s not really happening but maybe it sort of is? and I think that stands out so much because there were so few episodes anyway. like, if it was a real long-runner, having an inconsequential non-canon Halloween episode would be fine. but when you only have 40 episodes total and you have SO MUCH story to cram into them, it feels a little odd to use one of those episodes for something that detached from the main story. especially in season 2. I mean, I know there are things in the stories that foreshadow or reflect the main plot, but it’s so hard to know how to take them because we don’t have any context for how they’re happening in the first place and by their nature they can’t actually progress the plot at all and…yeah. it’s just…weird. it does have Stan trying to sell a Palantir, though, so that’s good.

okay, there you go. if I had to pick five, those would be it. I mean it all in a constructive criticism sort of way, except it’s not really constructive criticism since they’ve all long since aired and no one involved in making them was asking for my input but…uh…you know what I mean.

[hell-and-pepsi]

what is a tagged can you eat it

I guess I was tagged by @ilwinsgarden ? That was a surprise, people don’t tag me in stuff too often, thank you very much!

Rules: Answer all the questions, then add one of your own, and tag as many people as there are questions

1) Coke or Pepsi? I never drank coke in my life. I tried Pepsi once so I guess Pepsi.

2) Disney or Dreamworks? I’d say Dreamworks, especially since my brother is a huge fan of How to Train your Dragon

3) Coffee or Tea? Tea, in all forms and quantities - from a cheap-arse tea bag put in a bucket of hot water to exquisite brands prepared by the rules of the Chinese traditional tea ceremonies

4) Books or movies? First read the book, then watch the movie based on it. Never vice versa (except if the book is really crappy compared to the movie)

5) Windows or mac? Windows! Also doors. Illuminators. Ceiling lights. Ventilation vents. If you can punch a hole through a wall, that’s nice too.

6) D.C. or Marvel? Not a fan of either.

7) Xbox or PlayStation? Never had neither of them.

8) Dragon age or mass effect? I never played neither of them and I don’t even have friends that played any of these :(

9) Night owl or early riser? Early riser. If you can manage to, which doesn’t happen to often to me unfortunately.

10) Cards or chess? I can barely play any card games, I don’t even know the names of the card suits in Russian (but I know them perfectly in English because Homestuck.) So chess, even though I haven’t played chess either in a very long time.

11) Chocolate or vanilla? Chocolate any time.

12) Vans or converse? I don’t care much for fashion so either is fine

13) Lavellan, Trevelyan, Cadash, or Adaar? Low Sorbian? Volapük? Or are those not weird language names?

14) Fluff or angst? Both. Both is good. 

15) Beach or forest? Um. Have you looked at my username. Well, I guess you should just look at it again

16) Dogs or cats? Cats! Especially my cat, Sebastian. Though dogs are cool as well.

17) Clear skies or rain? Clear sky! I am basically a reverse vampire, I can’t live without a blue sky and a bright sun up above. Also, stars at night *_*

18) Cooking or eating out? I’m broke, so cooking.

19) Spicy or mild food? I like spicy. But honestly, it all depends on the ability of the cook. Mild food can be very tasty too if done right.

20) Halloween/Samhain or solstice/yule/Christmas? @ilwinsgarden while answering this question said that they don’t celebrate Hallowe’en in Czech Republic and I relate - we don’t celebrate it in Russia as well save for the occasional shop sell. 

But here we go even more extreme - we don’t celebrate Christmas either! In the Soviet times the main winter celebration shifted to New Year’s Eve, and that’s what we celebrate mainly up to this day. Christmas is a religious holiday solely, and moreover, because Russia is mainly an Orthodox Christian country and not a Prothestantic/Catholic/Anglican one, we celebrate Christmas two weeks later than Catholics (January the 7th).

Actually, even putting cultural differences aside, I don’t like the themes of both holidays. The modern media has generalized and cheapened them so that Hallowe’en is merely pumpkin spice and costumes instead of being a spiritual day, and Christmas is merely presents and trees instead of an important Christian milestone. I guess I enjoy Christmas a little bit more.

21) Would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too hot? Uhhh, that’s a tough one! But I am actually often a little too cold (including today), so if I choose a little too hot perhaps it can cancel it out? :D

22) If you could have a superpower what would it be? There are so many choices! Super intellengence would be helpful. Teleportation would allow me to travel anywhere in the world for free. If I could create plant life or accelerate its speed of growth, I could end famine.

23) Animation or live action? Both have their perks. Currently I’m more invested in animation, but I would really like to explore live action movies and even create ones myself.

24) Paragon or renegade? Okay, so I learnt a new English word today! Paragon, huh. And as much as I love the sound of that word I choose renegade. I’m a rebel by nature.

25) Bath or shower? Showers are cooler and more eco-friendly, but when you’re tired all you want is a nice hot bath. So both once again, depending on your state.

26) Team Cap or team Ironman? Like I said above, I’m not a fan of Marvel.

27) Fantasy or sci-fi? Don’t make me choose like this! But when I was younger I definitely enjoyed sci-fi more, and I know there’s still a lot of classic authors for me to explore.

28) Do you have 3 or 4 favorite quotes if so what are they? Oh boy, you came for a treat. “Fears are caused by a lack of understanding. And in the world we live in, you have unlimited information out there. There’s no reason you should be afraid of anything”  - Ethoslab, my most favourite Youtuber and Minecrafter ever. I don’t remember the exact episode, but I believe it was in his Let’s Play series around 390-410 ish, when he was building Sandy City.

“I mean, I know you want it to stay pleasant around here, but — there are so many things … that are so much better. Like silly, or sexy, or dangerous … or brave. And every one of those things is in you all the time, if you just have the guts to look for them.”  - Bud Parker, from the movie Pleasantville. Go watch it. It’s a true piece of art. I watched it in my English class in detail and it was absolutely delightful and amazing and so, so true.

“I never let school interfere with my education.”  - (incorrect, I think) Mark Twain. Sums my feeling about school perfectly.

“Every moment is the moment, and everything you lose, you lose forever.”  - my teacher. He told us once to remember this saying very carefully, even if we don’t understand it fully, because there may come a time where it will be very, very true for us. It is one of those quotes that you do not memorize, but which memorizes you instead.

29) YouTube or Netflix? I don’t have a Netflix account and I don’t even know whether the site is available in my country. But I spend endless hours on Youtube.

30) Harry Potter or Percy Jackson? Look at my nickname and my avatar yet again... plus I never quite got into Percy Jackson. I think I only read one book. Its fans make cool fanart though, with many different ships.

31) When do you feel accomplished? When I do something that’s supposed to be “in my field” and I do excellent on it. Also, contrariwise, when I have to go through something I’m scared or unexperienced to do and perform well.

32) Star Wars or Star Trek? Okay, please don’t kill me for this, but I never watched a Star Wars movie in my life. I also didn’t watch Star Trek, but I relate to it a little bit more because I’m a fan of Doctor Who which is a show from the same time. Plus Star Trek is responsible for a lot of modern sci-fi tropes, its fans started the modern fanfiction culture (including the concept of shipping), and it’s a historical and innovative piece in general.

33) Paperback books or hardcover books? I don’t have a strong opinion of this, and I read books online mostly nowadays. In my experience, different kinds of books are more prone to being in a hardcover or in paperback. Both of those types can be very enjoyable.

34) Fantastic beasts or Cursed child? Seen/read neither. (I feel so ignorant while answering those... haven’t seen that, haven’t read that...) But from what I saw and heard, especially from my little brother, Cursed Child is a hectic fanfiction piece somehow gone canon (and Rowling had barely to do with it anyway) and Fantastic Beasts is, well, a fantastic piece of work. Also Americans got their own Potter movie. (like A Very Potter musical wasn’t enough)

35) Rock or pop music? My music taste is dictated by artist, not style. That being said, nowadays I have more favourites in pop than rock.

36) What is the most important thing in your life? Keeping close to my principles/morals. Expressing those principles and morals in one way or another, because I find it something important to show to other people. Trying to help the people I call my friends. Trying to make sense in this big mess of things we call the world.

37) Mountains or sea/ocean? Tough question again! But I guess I’ve been to the sea like, thrice in my life, and never been to the mountains, so sea/ocean.

38) How do you express yourself? Mostly in words and sometimes in action. But my ultimate goal is to create content through which I could successfully express my view of the world.

39) What’s the first book/film that really counted to you? Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. When I was little I never cried at books at movies. But there was something in chapter 34 (where Harry has learn the truth about himself and goes to the Forbidden Forest to be killed by Voldemort) that made me shed my very first tear. The name of the chapter was The Forest Again, so, well, you can see how big of an impact it was for me.

40) What’s your element (air, water, etc.)? I want to be the Avatar! :D But seriously, I can’t really choose. By my star sign, Leo, it’s fire.

41) If you could travel anywhere, where would you go? Is “everywhere” an option?

42) If you had any job in the world, what would it be? A teacher in a school that is actually a good school. Not that those exist. Or a cartoon/anime/movie director/screenwriter.

43) If you were granted three wishes, what would they be? I guess all unlimited wishes hacks are banned, so:

1) World piece 2) Unlimited food to end world famine 3) Unlimited eco-friendly power source to end (most of) the world’s ecological problems.

44) If you had to eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be? Pizza! Because you can put anything on a pizza.

45) What’s currently the most pressing issue on your mind, and what’s stopping you from fixing it? Is “everything” an option” [2]? But seriously, it’s probably my unpreparement for the uncoming exams and the search for my future career. The first one is caused by just lazyness and the boringness/objective unimportance of the exams, and the second time always takes time, naturally. So they are pressing, but at the same time I don’t worry too much at “failing” them.

46) What is your dream companion animal? A cat! Or a cool bird, like a jay or an oreole.

47) Raptors or songbirds? Raptor songbirds. Just imagine.

48) Do you think there is life on other planets in universe? “Two possibilities exist: Either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying. “ Arthur C. Clarke sums my opinion on this pretty welI

Woah, that’s a lot of questions! It also took me a lot of time to answer them, it’s super late for me now. Here’s my question:

49: If you knew you were going to die in 24 hours, what would be some of the things that you do?

And I can’t possibly tag 49 people, so here’s just some: @polyglotplatypus, @kuufox, @artisticprotector, @cultureklub, @crap-iccioso,  @glannniglaepur, @stefan-stefansson, @moonpaw17, @klavierr, @antialiasis, @johannesviii and basically anyone else who wants to do this. And if you don’t want to do it, of course you’re not obliged in any way. @ilwinsgarden thank you so much for tagging me once again!