#Permanent Exhibit
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i know a lot of people like to make fun of young queer people who use a bunch of microlabels and engage in niche or "cringe" aesthetics but im gonna be so honest, i love them so much. i 100% was that kid and while now i don't really use or think about any of the labels i used back then, that doesn't make that time any less valuable and valid (and it doesn't make someone less valid if they do keep using that terminology into their adult life!). queer kids who are figuring themselves out and are learning about new fun words for genders and pronouns and sexualities deserve to run wild and be loud and happy and not carry and be impacted by the shame that many of us have been taught to hold.
my cousin is a year younger than how old i was when i first realized i was queer and they've vaguely known they were queer for a couple years now. personally, i think that's pretty awesome. recently they've gotten into the very stereotypical scene kid aesthetic and i make a point to compliment them on it every time i see them. almost every time i see them they have a new adjustment as to how they view their gender/sexuality and i always tell them that that's really cool and i give them a hug. recently they told me they have a boyfriend and listed like 3 separate labels as to how he defines his gender and i asked them if i was remembering the definitions of all those words correctly (which i was because, like i said, i was that kid lol).
it's just all these small things that seem so trivial or "weird/cringe" that so many people look down on queer kids for engaging in and i'll never understand it. i think it is so unbelievably cool that these people are figuring themselves out and finding new terms and identities and things that they can be and they're just so excited by it. being excited by queerness is cool! wanting to engage in niche subcultures is cool! allowing yourself to be who you are in that moment without the worrying guilt of having to get it "right" is wonderful and awesome and cool and how it should be!! please do not teach the queer kids to be ashamed of themselves in a time where they should be able to run wild and figure out their identities in a way that truly makes them happy!!!!
#sorry for rambling but this is something im genuinely very passionate about#theres this idea of “oh theyll grow out of it”#okay and??#something something “show me a permanent state of self”#and even more infuriating is the idea of “they make the queer community look bad by having all these microlabels!!”#or “those labels/sexualities/genders arent real!"#fun fact buddy#gender and sexuality and even LANGUAGE#ISNT REAL#NONE OF ITS REAL#ITS ALL SOCIALLY CONSTRUCTED FICTIONAL CONCEPTS#IT MAKES NO SENSE TO WANT OTHER PEOPLE TO PLAY BY THESE FICTIONAL RULES YOU MADE UP FOR THESE FICTIONAL CONCEPTS#also cishet people aren't gonna respect you any more as a queer person just because you're one of the “normal” ones#and if they do. boy oh boy i have news for you.#they never respected you and your queerness in the first place#the purpose of queerness is not and never has been to be palatable#it is about being yourself and self expression and radical acceptance of the full range of human gender and sexuality#it is about finding joy in the very thing that people deem you an outcast for being#will these kids likely “grow out of it”? yes but that doesnt make their experiences any less real and true and valuable#imo queer kids exhibit one of the most true forms of queerness which is self-discovery#the way they radically embrace this thing about themselves they are largely taught to feel shame for is beautiful and commendable#we should honestly all be learning from them#and also supporting them!! this is a very crazy stage of life! let queer kids in your life know you love and support them!!#in every stage of their journey!!!#sorry ive been having a very rambly day today#but i just think about this every time i see my cousin#and i see myself in them and i know how awful i felt bc i had no one who cared/supported me in that#and i just want to make sure they have at least one person#who they know thinks theyre cool as fuck and is on their side 100%#also my cousin thinks im cool! which is crazy!! and i wouldve gone WILD if i knew that someone i thought was cool that *I* was cool!!!
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Mental health affirmation of the day: the fact that the museum where I no longer work will soon have a medieval themed exhibit doesn't feel like a knife right through my heart and doesn't make me at least 25% more depressed than I currently am, I'm fine with it actually :)
#i'm absolutely not lmao#like for real i'm running out of funny ways to talk about how this year legit just feel like a succession of punches to the throat#i know more about medieval history than literally any of their guides (and that's not me being cocky it's just a straight fact)#and sharing facts about this period with the public would be a literal dream but eh#fuck me i guess#i mean it's just a temporary exhibit so it wouldn't be a permanent thing but still#feeling extremely bitter and defeated atm#also posting about it here since it's vaguely related to history as a concept#and to give my followers on main a break from my constant whinging
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It tugs, sometimes. Curious and foolish.
That traitorous heart mana of his, reaching out, drawing in, seeking connection in the way that's in their blood, their soul, their nature. Synchronicity.
Rei's not known it, before.
Where other demons might be attuned to family, Rei has no one to claim the spot. So, his heart mana sings, unblemished, its lonely little sonata, the song of his homeland. All there is to him, granted by air and earth and starlight.
He has so much to give, and yet, it isn't good enough. Discordant, they say. Human, they snarl, disgust evident in their tones.
Thus, growing up Rei learns to compose himself. Pushes himself to the brink in order to rewrite his heartbeat's melody. Puts himself out there, gets stronger, richer in experience, whenever he draws back. Over and over and over again.
Until one day, pushing himself past reason, he almost doesn't return.
But while he hasn't been looking, a new melody has taken residence by his side. Soft and steady high notes, barely perceptible.
Morofushi Hiromitsu, faded, yet giving himself so generously.
Rei hears him, takes him in and amplifies the notes he's given, until others may do so, too. Until Hiro may do it himself.
Their hearts mana, separate but inseparable, resonating in response.
And Rei's called back home.
.
Rye is low notes, a deep bass, slow and steady.
He could enrich their harmony, if only he wasn't so gratingly offbeat.
Rye's unrefined and ever-contradicting himself. Cold and uncaring, yet bleeding red like the rest of them. A long-ranged combatant, always too close. The smartest fool Rei ever has had the displeasure of meeting.
He takes Rei's heart mana greedily, gives it back tenfold.
Then he takes Scotch's, and their tentative song, not yet given voice, dissolves into dissonant whispers.
.
When they meet again, Rei doesn't want to feel Akai's heart mana for the longest time.
It's too painfully familiar, echoes of the past still trapped reverberating within. Misery-in-resonance almost dusts Rei.
It's his duty to be here, and so he stays, but there's others to preoccupy himself with.
So, he remains a careful distance away from Akai. Doesn't see the muted melancholy wrapped around him until it's too late, until Akai's almost gone dark and quiet.
When he heals Akai, he pours all of his heart mana into him. Their hearts still sing the same tune, after all these years, discordant notes and all.
.
The journey is too perilous to allow them senseless grudges. Their lives are one. If either falls, the story ends.
They rely on each other's mana like air, sharing desperate breaths like drowning men in a land that wants to drag them under.
What even is left of their individual songs? It doesn't matter, anymore. They've shared so much it really is one and the same, disjointed notes smoothed out through time and touch and trial, into an elegy for Scotch.
.
As they finally reach tentative harmony, they rip themselves apart.
.
There is dissonance in Demon Lord Furuya’s heart. A furious ache that even Hiro's return can't soothe.
But he has a duty, to his land and his people. He can't stop to rest. Besides, the one to replenish his heart mana, he who's grown so good at it over the years, has left, exiled by Rei's own hand.
Akai is a fool, but so is Rei.
He clings to the thrum of Akai's low warm notes, barely an echo within himself.
.
Da capo al coda, the cyclical rhythm of life remains the same.
Rei's still not good enough.
He's bested their best. He's saved the realms. And all that matters, in the end, is that they see his heart mana, and find it lacking.
But he's no longer the lonely manaspawn he once was. His song no longer just his own.
He's holding the position through skill and strategy, through force of personality. With the help of friends and allies gathered on his journey.
They'll have to listen to his tune, this time.
.
The key, of course, is an argument.
Their feverish crescendo crashes into mellow adagio - along with their lips.
Rei knows, then: if no one else accepted him, the boundless love in Akai's heart would be enough to supply his heart mana for as long as he lives.
It's exhilarating, to share every last bit of himself, to accept all of Shuuichi in turn. Synchronized in full, for now and as long as they live.
Pulsating, between them, the potential to compose a new melody, together. Point and counterpoint. Bright and warm and vibrant and home.
.
When he takes Akai's hand, leads him to the dancefloor, the festive joy of friends and family soaking the ambient mana with joyous ringing, it's enough to put pressure even on Rei's heart mana.
He can't help thinking that this should've been so much easier. But theirs has never been the easy way.
And it's not the conclusion, but the overture to their new life, together.
The waltz of their future, a thunderous symphony.
.
@floofiestboy's Demon King Furuya AkAm AU is giving me too many feelings. Go read it here.
#and may the gods have mercy on anyone standing in their way#if they are lucky they get to pick whether they want to be shot or fried#so. uh. floof I hope this is okay. because I have feelings about this AU. mana and hearts and their interchangability#if you couldn't tell#this is what possessed me at 5 a.m. this morning and I want it out#floof you are insane for this AU#they have to take in mana to survive#they're always shaped by their surroundings#and when that's not enough they have to depend on their connections#altering the receiver through said connection. potentially permanently. see exhibit A(kai)#as the connection becomes deeper their mana. their hearts output. literally flows more efficiently#the heart wants what it wants. literally in this universe#floof. floof I am shaking. you. me. it doesn't matter at this point#akam#iris writes things#long post#somehow I went from mana wavelengths to soul frequencies. I think. whoops#fic recs
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::: about good design :::
@thedesignmuseumlondon - permanent exhibition
If good design can improve our world then presumably bad design can harm it.
#mood#fashion#design#designmuseum#london#permanent#exhibition#creativity#responsibility#art#studioriver#book
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If you’re in the Portland area please please please visit the Pinocchio exhibit at the portland art museum it’s literally magical



Today was one of the animation art days so I got to actually meet some of the puppet team and I’m still losing my mind
#guillermo del toro’s pinocchio#Pinocchio exhibit#portland art museum#stop motion exhibit#stop motion animation#also quite a few of them had previous work at Laika#showing my eggs cosplay to someone who made part of his outfit altered my brain chemistry permanently
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It's officially been a year since I last visited London. I need to fix that.
#beloved city of my birth that I could never permanently live in but love so dearly I miss you!!!!!!!#I kinda wanna go to the F1 exhibit but idk how expensive it is#(and like also see my relatives that's also v important)#personal
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anyway! the children are safely on the plane and i am finally safely home. feel a little bit dead. very glad i have tomorrow and monday off to recover
#i think they had a good time!#the formula of thrifting in between one big weird thing every day was very successful#i didn’t talk at all about the rothko chapel or the menil art compound bc idk how to yet#the chapel was a little eerie#the menil museum was Fine i loved one exhibit and didn’t care for their permanent ones#my brother said the photography gallery was very good#yeehawing; gunshots
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one controversial take i have about classic who is that we should talk more about the fact one of the most beloved one off villains is called 'the graff vynda-k'. what do any of those words mean and why does he fuck so hard
#personal crap#doctor who#classic who#i may be thinking about this bc i saw his costume at a doctor who exhibition today and found out it was reused from the bbc's anna karenina#which actually makes a lot of sense considering the story he's from is set on a planet that's permanently in a russian winter
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Awful that they don't even sell postcards of these lil dudes! Like in an ideal world, the museum sold replica amulets but nooooo.....
#saw some cool things on museuminsel! also saw some very not-cool things!#the irony of seeing human remains in a museum the same weekend the US banned doing that without permission is not lost on me#other beef: mediocre to bad accessibility for ppl with physical disabilities#weird thing (to me): no postcards or artbooks for temporary exhibits. a thing i'm very used to in US museums.#commercialism yadda yadda but it seems odd to go through the effort of curating these exhibits and not commemorate them#the contemporary ukrainian art next to classical art was cool and they'd already done writeups for each... why not collect those in a book?#interspersing pieces within the permanent collection was cool in theory but in practice they were hard to find even with a map of them
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unexpectedly saw my favourite sculpture in person for the first time and truly nothing beats that joy. was literally squealing and bouncing in the middle of a museum
#wrote a paper partially abt the artist in school so that's how i knew it but i've only ever seen grainy black-and-white photographs!!#so so cool to get to see the real thing!!#they brought her out of storage in december and i didn't know!! i'm so glad she's in a permanent exhibit now :D#hope the museum curators know that they made one very specific person very happy w that decision lmao#noah's stuff
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i dont actually think the rom is a BAD museum like if ur a tourist u should go but they like. never ever change their displays?? they have a couple special exhibitions sure but the rest is all the same so if ur from the city and have been a lot it gets boringgggg. so thats why i dont like it for myself
#idk why they dont change their permanent exhibits because the ago does all the time#like they have their themed rooms but even in like the canadian contemporary or whatever theyre always switching out paintings#some paintings r there no matter what like group of seven ones and so on#but they know how to have a good time. unlike some people.#museums#the rom has a sick building tho
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#whisper girl#permanent slave#wife exhibition#mature woman#dating#woman#sexy and beautiful#artists on tumblr#denial kink
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i got rickrolled today but it didn't work because i have adblocker installed, so youtube just told me i violated the terms of service. yesterday i was trying to edit a picture as a joke for my girlfriend, and google made me check a box to prove i'm human because i wasn't "searching normally".
it isn't just that capitalism is killing fun and whimsy, it is that any element of entertainment or joy is being fed upon by this mosquito body, one that will suck you dry at any vulnerability.
do you want to meet new friends in your city? download this app, visit our website, sign up for our email list. pay for this class on making a terrarium, on candlemaking, on cooking. it will be 90 dollars a session. you can go to group fitness, but only under our specific gym membership. solve the puzzle, sign up for our puzzle-of-the-month-club. what is a club if not just a paid opportunity - you are all paying for the same thing, which makes you a community.
but you're like me, i know it - you're careful, you try the library meetings and the stuff at the local school and all of that. the problem is that you kind of want really specific opportunities that used to exist. you are so grateful for libraries and the publicly-funded things: they are, however, an exception - and everything they have, they've fought tooth-and-nail to protect. you read a headline about how in many other states, libraries have virtually nothing left.
do you want to meet up with your friends afterwards? gift your friends the discord app. you can choose to go to a cafe (buy a coffee, at least), a bar (money, alcohol) or you can all stay in and catch a movie (streaming) or you can all stay in bed (rent. don't get me started) and scream (noise complaint. ticket at least).
you want to read a new book, but the book has to have 124 buzzwords from tiktok readers that are, like, weirdly horny. you can purchase this audiobook on audible! your podcast isn't on spotify, it's on its own server, pay for a different site. fuck, at least you're supporting artists you like. the art museum just raised their ticket price. once, they had a temporary exhibit that acknowledged that ~85% of their permanent art galleries were from cis white men, and that they had thousands of works by women (even famous women, like frida! georgia o'keefe!) just rotting in their basement. that exhibit lasted for 3 months and then they put everything away again.
walmart proudly supports this strip of land by the street! here are some flowers with wilting leaves. its employees have to pay out-of-pocket for their uniforms. my friend once got fined by the city because she organized a community pick-up of the riverfront, which was technically private property.
no, you cannot afford to take that dance class, neither can i. by the way - i'm a teacher. i'm absolutely not saying "educators shouldn't be paid fairly." i'm saying that when i taught classes, renting a studio went from 20 bucks an hour to 180 in the span of 6 months. no significant changes to the studio were made, except they now list the place as updated and friendly. the heat still doesn't work in the building. i have literally never seen the landlord who ignores my emails. recently they've been renting it out at night as an "unusual nightclub; a once-in-a-lifetime close-knit party." they spent some of those 180 dollars on LEDs and called it renovating. the high heels they invite in have been ruining the marley.
do you want to experience the old internet? do you want to play flash games or get back the temporary joy of club penguin? you can, you just need to pay for it. i have a weird, neurodivergent obsession with occasionally checking in to watch the downfall and NFT-ification of neopets. if i'm honest with you all - i never got into webkins, my family didn't have the money to buy me a pointless elephant. people forget that "being poor" can mean literally "if i buy you that toy, i can't afford rent."
you and i don't have time to make good food, and we don't have the budget for it. we are not gonna be able to host dinner parties, we're not made of money, kid. do you want some kind of 3rd space? a space that isn't home or work or school? you could try being online, but - what places actually exist for you? tiktok counts as social media because you see other people on it, not because they actually talk to you.
there was a local winter tradition of sledding down the hill at my school. kids would use pizza boxes and jackets and whatever worked, howling and laughing. back in september, they made a big announcement that this time, rules were changing, and everyone must pay 10 dollars to participate. when im not scared shitless, i kind of appreciate the environmental irony - it hasn't gone below 40. so much for snow & joyriding.
i saw a bulletin for a local dogwalking group and, nervous about making a good first impression, showed up early. the first guy there grimaced at me. "sorry," he said. "there's a 30-dollar buy-in fee." i thought he was joking. wait. for what? the group doesn't offer anything except friendship and people with whom to walk around the city.
he didn't know the answer. just shrugged at me. "you know," he said. "these days, everything costs money."
#spilled ink#warm up#“why did u tag it warm up” bc i wrote it off the cuff while drinkin coffee lol#btw the 30 dollar buy in for the dog walking is bc they pay the organizer a small pittance so she can#run fb ads and stuff and like she does put in a lot of work i don't mind paying her#but that's exactly what im fucking talking about like.#ppl can't afford to volunteer their time anymore and we all understand it!!! everything costs money for everyone!#like we didn't have to use to say ''do you mind paying me back for the stuff we ate''#we used to be able to afford to feed our friends once in a while!!!
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