#Pride Vs. Humility

[officialyourdailyinspiration]

Pride Vs. Humility

But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” - James 4:6

When the world makes pride look good, Lord, remind me that Your grace is for the humble. I turn aside from many "pleasures" in this world with a sigh, thinking I've lost out on something, but Your Word reminds me that those who resist You and Your will are the real losers.

Thank You for offering grace in increasing amounts. Encourage me in humility, that I may draw closer to You.

[r0bita]

I feel like Twitter is the worst place to share anything. Nobody, not even your friends, will interact with your posts unless you go out of your way to DM them directly or just sending the links to whomever.

And a lot of people find that very desperate, and sometimes rude, and therefore refuse to do it even though that's probably the only way you're going to get some following for whatever you put online.

The tag system and the search engine is bad, so even people who might have some general interest into you may post might not have the opportunity to see it. Your best chances of getting any content shown is to do what you mom's do when they wanna share instagram and tiktok videos of unfunny memes that you probably don't wanna see.

Shamelessly and directly share everything.

I hate it... but this does work.

[psalmonesermons]

Whoever exalts himself will be humbled (Matthew 18:1-4) Part 2

but whoever humbles himself shall be exalted

Here are some biblical models for humility

A. The Lord [Philippians 2:6]

B. Matthew 18:1-4

Verse 1 Disciples wanted privilege and glory.

Verse 2 Jesus called the child, he did not know why, he just came because the Master called him. He knew nothing in a sense, but the Word’s voice.

Verse 3-4; Disciples were humbled by the example of a child.

This child was the closest to humility and was used as an object lesson to them because children know little but just trust in God. That is like us, we know little but must learn to trust him. There should be no place for price and ambition.

You say, yes agreed, we ought to be humble but how do we do it?

I do not pretend to know all the answers but here are some suggestions.

1. Level with God; Get down on your knees regularly and confess your sins to him, begging forgiveness and admit to him you can do absolutely nothing for him in the power of the flesh. Declare your total dependence on him, ask him to reveal your areas of pride.

2. Admit to yourself that you do not have all the spiritual gifts, abilities and that you are interdependent on your brother and sisters in church. Count them more worthy than yourself.

3. Confess your faults one to another

4. Confess your worldly ambitions and desires to God and ask him to remove them (red lizards). Ask a brother or sister to pray for you.

5. Ask God to remove that in you that loves to near your name mentioned.

I need this. please pray for me.

6. Ask God for opportunities to serve people

7. Wash the feet of the saints

8. Fast regularly, puts flesh and pride down low.

Caution- the danger of False Humility

Colossians 2:18-23

God commands certain acts of humility, but the worshipping of angels was not one of them. We must worship God alone. The puffed up proud human mind reasoned that holy angels are superior beings. Our worship is meant to be done in humility (outward) not with inward pride and spiritual superiority.

We should ask God what he wants from us in terms of humility and remember that our acts of the flesh have no reward.

Amen

Prayer

[aasamshathegachagirl]

Seven deadly sins and heavenly virtues playing among us

Virtues

Sins

[jaffacountingtribblesinthetardis]

“You know, I always knew this place was small, but I never realized it was quite this tiny. Four of us cramped in here, never a chance to be alone.”

“I took a trip a few years ago, took Mrs. Columbo back to the house where I grew up. It looked all shrunken. I had five brothers and one sister, Miss Freestone, and that was really terrific. There was always someone around for company. We were never lonely.”

[tayasui-mono]

I LOVE how Will isn't picky with whatever Hannibal feeds him, the meat being human not withstanding. He eats the protein scramble and thanks him, he eats the Silkie chicken soup. He eats the fish dish that has the tail going into the mouth. He eats the Ortolan, of course, he is trying to catch Hannibal in this case. My point being!! Will doesn't eat any of these foods like he's on Man vs. Wild and he is starving with no other choice. Most of these dishes are clearly foreign to him, complicated by the way Hannibal describes them, but Will always accepts them graciously, simply, and with respect, and he thanks Hannibal. There is a certain humility in him when it comes to being offered food; Will respects the act itself. That someone put in the effort and made him something, so he will accept it kindly. He isn't difficult about it. At least with Hannibal - we haven't seen anyone else make him things. It could also just be that he can read how prideful and poised Hannibal is and understands the gravity of an act of service from him. But I just really adore it.

[fumifooms]

The core of Fullmetal Alchemist: All is one and Dwarf in the flask

Dwarf in a bottle is in my top 5 favorite FMA characters. No, not Father, that emotionless bland white bread empty husk, Dwarf, the whole. The sort of ball of void, the existential anomaly, so inhumanely human full with sins and individuality.

Fullmetal Alchemist is about willpower. About determination, about pursuing your goals without relenting. It is also about humility and about knowledge.

That is reflected in both the protagonist and the villain, though it is a theme common in most characters.  Both Edward and Dwarf in a bottle pursue their goals with great determination and will. Then, what is good with the manner of one and wrong with the other’s?

I believe a lot of it is about the very concept Dwarf symbolizes. Dwarf in the flask is artificiality.

An alchemy-made life. An artificial family. An artificial pursuit of knowledge and power, without caring about the journey of self-betterment that comes along with it, without caring to understand alchemy and its place in the world. Not only an artifical physical being, but also artificial emotionally; ripping apart his feelings and personality traits deemed negative to make himself into a “superior” being.

I think it’s also worth noting that yes, purging sins out of himself makes him lose those traits, even feelings. Then, if not greed, if not it all, what is pushing Father to pursue power? Greed said it himself: greed isn’t inherently bad, it’s the act of wanting. Father isn’t spiraling into a mad passion for alchemy, a pursuit of knowledge for innovation, or anything, he pursued his plan because he went through the motions, simply. As his feelings left him, all that stayed was the conviction without reasoning that since it was his plan before, he should see it to the end. Or perhaps it’s the course of action he logically came to. Perhaps alchemical enlightenment was deemed the obvious ultimate goal to have, without being interested in why it is or why it should be. Regardless, he lacks the passion and emotional intelligence to actually see the value in what he is doing, in alchemy, and ultimately that is what is punished.

I want to do a full dissection of the whole homunculus family, but I’m going to touch on some aspects of it here because it’s such an interesting topic to me. Disregarding Lust’s claim that homunculi are all individuals with a full range of emotions for a moment, I want to analyze what their traits mean in the angle that they fundamentally formed a whole all together as Father, or Dwarf in the flask.  The homunculus that is shown to be the most attached to his family members is Gluttony. The homunculus that is shown to be the most attached to relationships, in general, is Greed. Greed and Gluttony are then the homunculi, the traits, that care about people the most. And that makes sense, no? You don’t want to lose things you care about, you want to bathe in their love and their presence, and you want to keep having them for as long as you want, greed and gluttony aren’t unsimilar. Greed is interested in friendship and having companions, in possessing people’s hearts and loyalties, in making new connections and bonding with new faces. Gluttony is more interested in getting more of what he already has, more love in that way he already likes by the person he already loves, like wanting more of the familiar taste of its favorite meal. Other similar traits are pride and envy, the traits that affect your self-image. The feeling that you are remarkable and great and the feeling of wanting what others have or are, valuing yourself vs comparing yourself to others. By detaching parts of a whole, things get lost; Pride feels wholly superior but is ready to do anything to preserve himself including lowering himself to inferior beings going against his own code, while Envy only covers up his self-hatred and jealousy but would rather end himself before accepting to sully himself with the compassion of someone he looks down upon. Pride makes one value self-preservation, while envy is self-destructive by nature, perhaps. It is interesting that both feel prideful, yet Pride doesn’t reflect the fact that as part of a whole it also felt shame and low self-esteem, otherized, and Envy doesn’t reflect that Dwarf actually feels pride over traits they possess, as well. The truth is that these things coexisted in the one being that was Dwarf. Fragmented as they are, they only tell an uncomplete and incoherent story, like a puzzle. It’s ironic that maybe together, all these sins balance each other out to become healthier, less dysfunctional. Like a family, they can offer counterbalance to a trait when it becomes too central to the individual, offer support through their grounding presence. Someone slothful may feel unmotivated without greed to give them goals, pride without envy will make you stop striving to better yourself and envy without pride will give you self-loathing.

An analysis of Dwarf isn’t complicated to do: it was a being brought about by scholars and complex alchemy, enslaved, and it wished to get the power to free itself and become an individual equal/superior to everyone else. Unable to become physically and fundamentally human, he attempted to become a proxy, close enough to it; making a family, gaining a human form, etc. It ultimately wished to pursue superiority through alchemical power and knowledge when he found the result lacking, when it still didn’t feel human, couldn’t connect with others, still felt fundamentally different, like his place in the universe was somewhere else, like striving for that higher calling would solve it. Blinded by lust to find belonging, wether it be in a place or in a role, it pushed itself to extremes of alchemy in the hope it will all make sense once he gets there. Ultimately futile, as he will end up feeling betrayed and abandoned by Truth itself, not able to rise up to its own expectations once more: because there’s no magic able to make one feel whole. He seeked to sculpt himself into a perfect being, one that could be anything and do anything, one that couldn’t be reproached, if not by humans, then the world itself would confirm and showcase his objective superiority for all to see.

Much like with Shou Tucker, this pursuit for knowledge and power is all for external factors, there is no inner fuel for it besides pride, shame, desperate want that was displaced onto alchemy instead of the self-introspection that alchemy promotes and necessitates. Dwarf ended up missing what was right under his nose, and subsequently failed the test of Truth and lost everything. What he was working towards ultimately meant nothing, not to anyone and not even to himself.

Edward was able to face Truth right because he took the time to understand, learned to not abuse it, reflected on what it all meant, on the place of things in the universe. That is terrifying for Dwarf, who is terrified he may simply have no place in it, but it is nonetheless essential. The other homunculi are proof enough: Greed had friends, was accepted in the friend group of our heroes as a trustworthy and dependable person, Ling would have preferred him to stay with him forever instead of leaving. Selim gets a second chance at life with someone who has loved him with all her heart… Which is the most confusing part of FMA I have no idea how he didn’t die ngl but I’m glad for the precious lil guy~ Even Lust and Gluttony found companionship and care in being together.

Dwarf has always had a place. He simply refused to philosophizes, and alchemists are ultimately philosophers. Not thinking power through, not analyzing it, is what leads to corrupt military states. Dwarf wanted to be recognized and accepted by god and the world itself, by showing himself worthy of it and demanding it, but he was the one who rejected the nature of the world first:

One is all, all is one.

He is the very embodiment of refusing that. Dwarf always had a place in the world, artificial anomaly as he was. Perhaps Dwarf wasn’t meant to be part of this all or this one initially, not created by the world, but. Dwarf seeked to become both all and none at once. He was born artificial, but never cared to learn the rules of nature and accept the limits of the world, seeking to destroy and warp them; he was the one that desired to make himself even more distinct from the world and label himself as a perfect, artificial being. Rejecting individuality to become some empty looking glass was the mistake Edward Elric didn’t make, growing to find the value in every type of life and finding the strength to keep going through every horror of the world. Dwarf’s folly was thinking that he was separate from the rest of existence.

The philosophical dimension to the value of gold or philosopher’s stones are the important part of alchemy, power isn’t what you achieve enlightenment through. May your pursuit of knowledge be wise and your resolve aim true.

–+–+–+–+–+–+–

I recommend this analysis by another tumblr user as complementary reading!! It goes over way more than I did and encompasses more of fma than this post, I just wanted to focus on a fraction of the themes and narrative that I found summed up the story’s key points well… Idk idk I’m a humble Dwarf enjoyer I don’t want to come across as pretentious 🙇 I can only hope this was a nice read. If you don’t remember the ending of the manga/brotherhood well I imagine this being very confusing, I should do something about that

[momentsbeforemass]

Let go and let God

Someone asked me: “How do you know if you’re doing God’s will vs. your own? How do you ‘let go and let God?’”

Two great questions. And the answers are kind of connected. But we need to start with the second one first – “How do you ‘let go and let God?’”

I’m a planner. I like to know how things are going to work out. I like to be ready for when they don’t.

Which means that I am tempted to worry about all kinds of future events. From stuff that I know will happen to stuff that probably never will happen. On my worst days, I can easily “what-if” myself into a torrent of worst-case scenarios.

I guess I’m trying to say that I struggle with letting go.

And yet – that’s exactly what Jesus calls me to do. Starting with one of His classic, snarky reality checks – “Can you by worrying add a single moment to your life?” (Matthew 6:27)

If “what-iffery” isn’t actually doing anything for me, then what’s the alternative? “Humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time. Cast all your worries upon Him because He cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:6-7)

Translation – I have to get over me first. Because thinking that I have to handle it (or even that I can handle it) on my own can easily drift into pride. I’m supposed to get over myself. And hand my worries over to God.

How do I do that? “…in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God.” (Philippians 4:6) 

Translation – take everything to God in prayer. Literally everything.

Did it just become a concern for you? Right at the first moment you realize you’re worrying about it, take it to God in prayer.

Is it weighing on you? Take it to God in prayer.

Are you having intrusive thoughts about it, again? Take it to God in prayer, again.

If something pops into your when you’re praying about something else, don’t try to ignore it. Make it your focus. Take it to God in prayer.

The most important part? Taking it to God in prayer, with thanksgiving.

That is, taking it to God in prayer now. And then thanking God for taking care of it.

Not in the sense of “I know you will, God.” But in the sense of “I know you have, God.” Thank God for taking care of it, in the past tense. Because He already has.

If I’m thanking God for taking care of it in the past tense, that means two things – there’s something I have to do, and there’s something God will give me.

The something I have to do? Not take it back. Thanking God in the past tense means taking it to God. And leaving it.

I struggle with this one. Which means that every time I find myself taking something back, I have to stop. And remind myself of the first rule of taking things to God in prayer. No backsies.

Some days I end up doing this a lot.

But when I do, that’s when I get to the whole point. The something God will give me. When I take it to God in prayer. And leave it.

“Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:7)

That’s the payoff. The humility, the trust, that leads us to take it to God in prayer. And leave it.

That’s the only road to the peace of God.

More on this tomorrow.

Today’s Readings

[sokkastyles]

Another thing I've been seeing more and more of that just isn't supported by the actual show is the idea that Zuko needs to "realize" that Azula worked hard to get where she is, and not only is this victim blaming because it ignores how both Ozai and Azula treated Zuko as a scapegoat, it's also simply not true.

Zuko is the one in the text who believes in working hard, while Azula believes in superiority through inherent ability.

I often see people quoting Zuko's line about how everything came easy to Azula and their father said she was born lucky as evidence of Zuko's "jealousy" of Azula's hard work and skill, and how he needs to realize how much pressure she was under, but those people are forgetting what Zuko says right after that.

I don't need luck, though. I don't want it. I've always had to struggle and fight, and that's made me strong. That's made me who I am.

Zuko rejects the belief Ozai tried to enforce about being born lucky. He of course still struggles with it, because he's a kid and being told repeatedly by adults that you are inherently worthless is a hard thing to combat without internalizing. Zuko struggles with assuming that he can't generate lightning because it blows up in his face, "like everything always does." Throughout his journey, he learns to embrace working hard, learning and growing to overcome those mental blocks.

But to say that Azula, in comparison, has a better understanding of hard work is just wrong. What Zuko says about struggling and fighting actually is similar to what Azula says about Long Feng.

I can see your whole history in your eyes. You were born with nothing, so you've had to struggle, and connive, and claw your way to power. But true power, the divine right to rule, is something you're born with.

Azula ultimately disdains the idea of having to struggle to achieve things, and says that true power is something you are born with.

This isn't just an Azula vs Zuko thing, this is a major theme of the story and part of what leads to Azula's ultimate downfall. While Zuko works hard and grows not just in ability but his worldview, adapting and becoming a better person in the process, Azula's worldview narrows in her need to prove her own inherent perfection, which causes her to become more myopic and end up alone.

From the beginning of the story, we see Azula trying to get others to bend to her, even trying to argue against the very tides themselves because of her unwillingness to believe in anything less than her own inherent right. This is also similar to the way other Fire Nation characters show a myopic view of the world that leads them towards megalomania, like Zhao attempting to destroy the moon in pursuit of his own greatness. Both he and Azula think they can defy nature because of their own need to prove themselves powerful. Zuko tries this, too, in "The Storm," and learns one of many lessons about humility and working with others. Azula fails to learn these lessons.

So it's not Zuko who needs to learn this by the end of the series, and especially not from Azula.

I think it's also telling that these people never talk about how much pressure Zuko was under to try and prove he wasn't worthless, and I think that's because by the end, Zuko has realized his own worth, but Azula is still desperately trying to cling to the belief in her own superiority. She's the only one who can relieve that pressure she's putting on herself because she can't let go of the idea that she's not better than other people, and it is not on the people she hurt to try and make her feel better about herself, when she still thinks she's superior to them.

Moreover, I find it very hard to believe that post series Azula would even accept any offer of sympathy from Zuko. This is another example of something Zuko learned in the series that Azula did not, as Iroh says. Pride is not the opposite of shame, but its source. Azula's belief in her own superiority is, of course, a coping mechanism as a result of very low self-esteem, but she needs to figure out how to deal with that in a way that isn't hurting others. What she doesn't need is constant validation from people she victimized and reinforcement of the same toxic beliefs.

[dropout-if]

Hi hi! What would you say is the ROS' greatest sin VS virtue? (👀 The Deal fan here)

Aw thanks🥺

Jade/Jean- Wrath / Temperance

Uma- Sloth / Humility

Statler- Greed / Patience

Wanda- Pride / Kindness

Kai- Lust / Charity

Travis- Envy / Diligence

[greenyvertekins]

Hmm, it seems some often mistake "Ego" for "Pride" when it comes to Sonic and vice versa. (There's a difference between having "a strong sense of self" vs "thinking you're the greatest thing in the world".)

Sonic and Eggman are definitely confident in themselves and their abilities, but the main thing that separate the two on that front is humility. Sonic gets awkward at times when complimented and gives credit where it's due; not take it all for himself. (On the other hand, Eggman is either patting himself on the back for anything that his inventions do [which includes Metal and Sage] or placing the blame to anyone but himself. *Imagine how jarring if Sonic did this.)

((*Might be just me but, Sonic doesn't seem like the type that would give the 3rd degree, even if he knew who was at fault. Or rather, he doesn't seem like someone who would really PRESS into people? Amy, Knuckles, and Rouge feel like they fit that sort of thing more.))

Sonic is so humble that he actually gets embarassed about being shown obeisance or being referred-to by honorifics. He even insists people like Shahra and Elise refer to him just by his name instead of Master and Mr respectively.

He's incredibly interesting because of that. Well, amongst the other fascinating elements of his character.

By contrast, Dr Eggman is so utterly arrogant, thinks so highly of himself that he refers to himself as "Dr Eggman-sama." Sonic even points this out in the JP script of Forces.

[fictionadventurer]

Top five favorite themes for a story?

Hope vs. Despair

Recapturing Innocence/Wonder

Accepting there's something beyond the everyday

Learning to Trust Others/Accept Love

Humility vs. Pride

[cookiecomics]

⭐⭐⭐ give me that directors infodump 👀

Hehehe I'll give my director's cut on Futaba's awakening!

So I am super in love with the day Persona 3 did their second awakenings. The idea that events in the characters' lives independent from the protagonist caused a shift in their psyche that caused them to develop as characters was appealing for me. Without Ren as the driving force behind the change, they had to change on their own which led me to try to brainstorm what events might push different characters to the brink.

For Makoto it was having everything about the police and justice stripped away with both her own actions, the actions of her sister and how it all culminated into getting a full view of what the justice system she craved to belong to can do to those with no power to do otherwise, it changed her in a way that she can't come. back from. That in my eyes, was the tamest of the bunch.

Then we had Akechi, someone who, at every turn, refused to free himself from his own mental shackles of the situation he's been in. How he viewed his mother and her complicated life. How he viewed himself in relation to his father and in relation to the world. He never really went after what HE wanted, only what he thought was what he was destined to do. To him, finding meaning in life meant finding some sort of balance that would be worth the cost of his mother's life. Bringing down Shido was that for him. A monster through and through and just like the stories and legends that Akechi is no doubt familiar with, that kind of karmic justice may not be "worth" his mother's life, but it's worth his. It's penance for what she had to go through. He wasn't living for himself, not really.

There's a saying in Naruto that really spoke to how I developed Ren and Goro in this fic. Sasuke said Naruto couldn't understand him because he's been alone from the very beginning vs Sasuke who lost everyone he loved. Those are two very different types of loneliness and two different sources of anger that feel like they should be the same, but they aren't. Fundamentally, they aren't, and that's why Ren was unable to reach him in that way.

From the very beginning, I knew Futaba and Cog Akechi were going to be the mechanism for Goro's second awakening. Goro's ultimate villain after all isn't fully Shido, it's always been himself. His perception of himself, his past, his inability to let himself have that love and adoration he craves now that he's found it. The person who could reach him was the only other person who would understand his very unique brand of pain in Futaba.

Being told it wasn't his fault his mom killed herself from someone that in his eyes, has every reason to despise him, to curse him, to see him fall, meant something to him. It reached him in a way that Ren couldn't in this side of the fic because Goro never tried to kill Ren. Not really, but he did ruin Futaba's life in the exact same way that his was ruined. That's why Futaba was the only one who could reach him.

She knows what it's like to believe and be told by others that your life was a burden on your mother, that self hatred, that hatred for the world at large, that need and desire for some sort of justice for your mother. Futaba gets all of that and she says as much in the game. She doesn't have to forgive him, but she can give him what he needs, and show him first hand, in action, that love is complicated.

As for Futaba's awakening, considering the deadly sin being explored in the palace was pride, neither Ren nor Goro was wholly equipped to deal with the palace at large.

They both wanted different things and were reluctant in their own ways to compromise the whole way through. It wasn't until both of them learned that they needed other people- that they could get saved by the person whose shown the most humility in the story thus far, Futaba.

Humility can be defined as having a realistic view of yourself and self-importance. Goro and Ren both put their goals above others, repeatedly.

Futaba is one of the few people in the story who never tries to sacrifice those around her for herself. When given the option to abandon Makoto to save herself when Goro takes everyone hostage, she rejects that. When given the choice to leave Goro to Cog Goro, she rejects that too. She stands up for Ren against the phantom thieves, and even against Sojiro. Time and time again, Futaba shows that humility when everyone else especially Ryuji, Ann and Makoto often fall to their own instances of pride or anger.

And most importantly, as much as Ren's whole life was turned upside down by Shido. The person who suffered the most at the hands of Shido were Akechi and Futaba and Futaba deserved to smack her dad (lol at my fav hc) in his stupid bald head as vengeance for her mom. I was disappointed the game didn't give her a moment like that, but alas, condense storytelling.

Throughout the story, Futaba constantly desires to have the power to save those around her. With her awakening and her turning the tide against the big bad, she does just that.

[bethanydelleman]

What do you think are common among all Jane Austen protagonists? In terms of their personalities I mean.

One of the really amazing things about Jane Austen is how well she is able to portray different personalities. Of her heroines, no two are really exactly alike.

In basic terms, Emma, Elizabeth, Marianne, and Catherine are extroverts, Jane Bennet, Anne, Elinor, and Fanny are introverted, but only Fanny is actually shy. I’ve had people challenge me on these categorizations, but Elinor prefers to process emotions herself and not to share them with her family, while Marianne does performative grief. Anne finds the most comfort in her own thoughts.

If we look at the big five (or six) personality traits 

openness to experience (inventive/curious vs. consistent/cautious)

conscientiousness (efficient/organized vs. extravagant/careless)

extraversion (outgoing/energetic vs. solitary/reserved)

agreeableness (friendly/compassionate vs. critical/rational)

neuroticism (sensitive/nervous vs. resilient/confident)

honesty-humility (fair and genuine while dealing with others)

I think we can agree that the scores for each heroine would be different. Elizabeth is excited to travel and experience new things, Fanny Price would rather stay quiet at home. Elinor is more critical and rational, while Catherine is friendly and compassionate. 

But I’m not a social psychologist and I’ve always found these categories kind of fluid. Elinor is rational, but she is also very compassionate. Anne seems to be closed off to new experiences, she doesn’t want to go to London or Bath, but then glories in marrying a member of the navy. So is she open or not?

I don’t know if one could call it “personality” but what the heroines all share is a strong sense of right that is relatively unyielding. Even Emma, who occasionally shirks her duties, generally adheres to moral principles. Catherine stands strong in the face of peer pressure, as does Fanny Price. Anne will not ignore her sickly friend. Elinor staunchly follows the rules of propriety despite what it costs her and glories in Edward’s morality even when it hurts her. Elisabeth will not marry a man she does not respect.

All the heroines also have the capability to walk the line of prudence and avarice, discussed in Pride & Prejudice. Lydia marries for love only, without thought to money, Charlotte marries for comfort without love, and Lucy Steele marries for wealth without love; no Jane Austen heroine would do any of these things. Edward and Elinor will not marry without financial stability, even when Elizabeth is infatuated with Wickham, she knows they can’t really marry. Fanny Price, who is in the most economically dire situation, will not marry even though she could easily fall into poverty because she doesn't love Henry Crawford or believe he is a good man.

I think this point is important because love is not enough for a Jane Austen heroine, there must be some thought in regards to money. Charles Hayter and Henrietta Musgrove in Persuasion do not marry until he has a more stable position as a clergyman. This is shown as the right thing to do. But that is also a hard line to walk, as Marianne and Elinor discuss, what is a competency and what is wealth? Where does prudence end and avarice begin? I love that Jane Austen doesn’t think love is enough, because the statistics bear her out, money is the #1 reason for divorce.

So to sum up, Jane Austen’s heroines are very different in terms of personality. The things they have in common are a strong moral compass and the ability to stand strong in their principles. One of these principles is marrying prudently.

[demoisverysexy]

Joni C. Koch

I appreciated this talk, as it was pretty honest and forthcoming. It seems to me that pride is something Elder Koch struggles with, and investigating that and being open about it seems like a great way for him to practice humility. While there are a few gripes I have with this talk (I doubt there are "many" humble rich folks, and I feel like individualism vs humility to God is too simple a binary), I found the idea of refusing to be humble resulting in humiliation. Overall, nice talk!

[vanillatwlght]

expectation vs. hope

Hari ini, aku menyadari sesuatu yang penting, yang sebelumnya tidak pernah kupikirkan. Aku baru benar-benar memahaminya ketika merasakannya sendiri. Mari kembali ketika aku pertama kali mendapat pekerjaan.

Saat aku wisuda, aku masih magang di suatu perusahaan. Sebagai orang yang sering kali overthinking, aku mulai memikirkan apa jadinya hidupku selanjutnya. Bagaimana karirku nanti? Apakah aku akan diangkat menjadi karyawan atau aku harus segera mencari pekerjaan baru?

Melihat budaya perusahaan yang kurang sehat, akhirnya aku memutuskan untuk mencari pekerjaan di perusahaan baru. Namun, kesalahanku adalah terburu-buru memutuskan.

Beberapa lama setelah aku melamar banyak pekerjaan, aku mendapat tawaran dari perusahaanku saat ini. Aku merasa senang karena berekspektasi akan bekerja lebih leluasa tanpa manager. Aku berekspektasi bisa menghandle pekerjaan, tidak masalah jika tidak ada tim.

Lalu saat aku masuk ke perusahaan ini, seluruh ekspektasi itulah yang menghancurkanku. Tidak bekerja dengan tim justru lebih berat. Tidak mendapat arahan dari manager, justru lebih membuat tertekan karena aku langsung mendapat permintaan yang banyak sekali dari direktur. Pekerjaan ini membuatku overwhelmed dan kurangnya apresiasi serta terbatasnya waktu untuk belajar, akhirnya membuatku menyerah. Alhasil, aku memutuskan untuk tidak memperpanjang kontrakku.

Aku mencari pekerjaan baru. Minggu lalu, aku mendapatkan tawaran. Di perusahaan baru ini, aku akan bekerja dalam tim. Aku punya manager dan officer. Aku berjanji pada diriku sendiri bahwa aku tidak akan berekspektasi. Aku hanya ingin fokus belajar dan ingin bekerja dengan baik.

Dari beberapa postingan sebelumnya, aku menyiratkan bahwa aku sedang membangun pemikiran yang positif. Hal ini akan membantuku untuk fokus bekerja dan memberikan yang terbaik. Lalu, hari ini aku iseng melihat profil manager dan officerku. Managerku pernah bekerja di Kompas Gramedia, perusahaan impianku. Officerku adalah kakak tingkat dengan portofolio yang luar biasa. Lalu muncul dalam hatiku, suatu harapan bahwa aku bisa belajar dari mereka.

Apakah berharap itu salah? Kalau berekspektasi juga salah, lalu apakah aku tidak boleh merasakan apa-apa? Akhirnya aku mencoba merumuskannya. Berekspektasi adalah suatu pemikiran yang membuat kita yakin kalau suatu hal akan terjadi. Kita sudah mengantisipasinya. Ketika ekspektasi itu tidak terjadi, kita justru akan kecewa. Dan semua yang kita kerjakan menjadi tidak bermakna.

Berbeda bila kita hanya berharap. Kita ingin suatu hal terjadi. Tapi jika hal itu tidak datang, kita tidak keberatan. Justru, kita punya alternatif atau rencana cadangan untuk mencapainya.

Di sinilah aku, belajar untuk mengurangi ekspektasi, namun tetap berharap.

Akhir kata:

"Having hope means you are trusting the process. Having an expectation means you are trusting the results.

Having a hope means that the future is uncertain. Having an expectation means that you are predetermining the future.

Having a hope is an action of humility. Having an expectation can be an act of pride.

Having a hope does not disappoint. Having an expectation often falls short.

Having a hope helps us acknowledge that God knows best. Having an expectation often indicates that you know best.

Having a hope produces a life of faith. Having an expectation produces a life of entitlement." -- Thane Marcus