#SCP techno

[nomsfaultau]

Fancy scp Technoblade, for all your stylish needs!

[anarchy-and-piglins]

We know CC techno is basically an SCP at this point. Like I can vaguely recall his face, kinda. That got me thinking of actual SCP techno. Maybe he’s the host to a parasitic SCP (blood god) or maybe there are two of them combined (him + blood god) or maybe just him. Something that makes him only vaguely memorable. There was a young man covered in blood at the bus stop.

What did he look like? Hmm, couldn’t tell you. I think he said something at some point. What was he wearing? I don’t know, but he was wearing something.

The SCP foundation is looking for this creature that causes security cameras to fizz and leaves trails of blood that match no known dna. They don’t even know if it’s human. No one can catch this anomaly. Dr. Phil of the Foundation is put on the case. Meanwhile, he takes the new intern, whose name he can’t quite seem to remember (it was tech something right? It was an odd name certainly. Dr. Phil’s degree in ancient history told him it was in old one.) is helping him track the Scp down. The new intern is weird, admittedly, but Dr. Phil’s other inter, Ranboo is also very odd, so he’s a veteran that this kind of thing.

Also, he keeps finding odd bloop stains on the new interns clothes. Concerning, but best not to ask too many questions at the Foundation.

I like the idea of the Blood God being an SCP with parasitic tendencies and Techno being the guy who it attaches itself to. Since it's in line with my dsmp headcanons (ie. Techno himself not being the Blood God but merely a conduit).

The Blood God would be SCP-(insert random number) and Techno is designated by the foundation as SCP-(insert same random number)-A. Though, aside from the parasitic god, he's literally just some guy. He gets taken into custody by the foundation both for his own safety and that of others.

When containment procedures are met, interacting with Techno is not dangerous and actually pretty chill. On the contrary, the Blood God gets agitated when its host is agitated, so keeping Techno safe and sound is actually paramount. He has a bed, gets fed well, and the head scientist (a Dr. Philza Craft) is free to interact with him to offer companionship, sometimes letting his interns interact with Techno also.

Containment procedures are pretty simple:

No blood should ever be within 15 feet of Techno, unless he spilled it himself. This includes blood samples or dried blood.

A bell must be provided for Techno to ring every few hours.

Once a month, Techno must spill blood as a sacrifice to the Blood God. Animals suffice, but humans are better. The amount of blood needed to sate the Blood God can be variable and depends on how agitated it is.

Strategy games such as risk, chess, competitive video games, etc should be provided. Games that Techno can 'win' in seem to keep the Blood God calm for longer and lower the amount of blood needed for a sacrifice.

Techno is functionally immortal (doesn't age and seems incapable of bleeding out, despite feeling the pain of any inflicted wound). Attacking him or trying to harm him usually ends terribly for the attacker. They did a lot of tests at first - also to figure out the containment procedures. But Dr. Philza currently doesn't allow tests anymore, they were both too distressing for Techno and too costly in Class-D subjects.

Killing Techno would be possible, but since the Blood God would just attach itself to another mortal, it's more interesting for the foundation to keep Techno locked up.

[nomsfaultau]

Sleepy boi just woke up

that “men! kiss each other!” post but its me asking everyone to post about technoblade. MUTUALS! PIG! I MEAN POST HIM. the creatueere

[sapnapstummy]

steady path to termination

Dream & Technoblade

Rated Teen | 6.4k words | Oneshot

For @nightfuryobsessed for the Dreblr Secret Santa Event

Techno and the Captain nod their heads, and Dream turns to look at the object a final time. “Shit,” he says, eyes locking with the object. “Shit Tech, I just looked at it and something’s happening.” “I'm going to let it approach me. Get ready.” Dream braces as it gets within arms reach. A second too late he notices the knife that had slipped out of the back of its metal hand. Pain erupts from his side as the knife slices through his hoodie.  “Run, Dream!” Techno shouts.

Written for the prompt: Speedrunner VS SCP, and based off of Dream's Speedrunner VS Terminator video.

I hope you like it!

[ofowlsdinosaursanddragons]

EXPLAINING THE EVIL TEAMS OF THE MAINLINE POKEMON GAMES POORLY.

TEAM ROCKET:

It's like a bizarre lovechild between the Mafia and the Yakuza but with a bit more techno-babble and black market animal trade.

TEAM MAGMA:

"Hey! Wanna see the world plunged into a volcanic hellscape by a lava godzilla just so we can lower the sea level by just a 7 inches?"

TEAM AQUA:

"Hey! Wanna see the reactment of the ancient deluge of ages past but by big-ass Whale and not divine punishment?”

TEAM GALACTIC:

Spacecore nihilists who wish to reset the whole world and create a world with no emotions. Despite the fact their leader has a pokémon that evolves via friendship.

TEAM PLASMA:

a glorious and just organization who wish to steal liberate Pokémon and we are ruled by an naive manchild hippie who may or may not be a shapeshifting fox proud ruler!

TEAM NEO PLASMA

Yeah no were just a bunch of zeppelin-riding terrorists who are ruled by a psychopath who wishes to freeze half of New York.

TEAM FLARE:

Aren’t we gonna ignore the fact that these guys might have had the highest body count out of all these teams right?

TEAM SKULL:

Punks rejected by society lead by Y A B O Y.

AETHER FOUNDATION:

The scp foundation but led by an alien jellyfish addicted, horrible MESS of a mother!

TEAM YELL:

punk rock hooligans who work with that weird Nosferatu looking man to “help her”.

MACRO COSMOS:

look if your boss wants to summon an EXTRATERRESTRIAL, RADIOACTIVE SATAN for a energy crisis a thousand years hence, I feel you should really consider quitting man.

TEAM STAR:

They were bullied by bullies so they formed a group to bully the bullies into not bullying and unfortunately became the bullies themselves. And you come in to bully the bullies into not bullying like some neverending cycle of bullying and bullies.

[raindrops-on-concrete]

Some Fic Recs

I've been reading a lot of fanfiction lately and also organizing my Ao3 bookmarks into collections, so I thought I might as well share some recommendations on here.

Mo Dao Zu Shi/The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation:

if you ever feel alone, don’t - a fun texting fic about the juniors trying to get WangXian together

save a sword, ride a socialist - very unhinged modern au fake dating WangXian, but also very fun and mostly lighthearted

on the unfortunate termination of your betrothal - approx. 15 years post-canon Jin Ling/Lan Sizhui that somehow end up in some sort of situationship after Lan Sizhui's fiancée calls off the wedding; it's very tender and just a lot of emotions

Gremlin Twitter Boyfriend - a lovely multivoice cast podfic, modern au fake dating WangXian, just very funny and lighthearted

Dream SMP/SBI:

How to Smile with Bloody Teeth - bedrock bros fluff where Tommy is the blood god and Techno is his last devout believer; it also has two sequels, one about Phil and on about Wilbur; a lot of very fun dramatic irony in the entire series

It's Not Arson, It's Team-building - tntduo modern au where they're both counselors at a summer camp and Wilbur is very melancholy because it's his last summer as a counselor

six fly amongst bloody stars - Aria Cinabun's lesser known space au, I believe, where Tommy, Tubbo, Ranboo, Purpled, Drista and Lani are a crew of space vigilantes that accept a job to kidnap senator Nihachu in order to save a planet which makes them the number one most wanted criminals in the galaxy

take this compass, follow it home - a sbi foster fic that deals with neurodivergency and self-worth issues; it's not sad but defintely heavy at times

[Podfic] CLASSIFIEDS. - a multivoice podfic, SCP au sbi told through incident reports and files on supernatural beings that are being held at the SCP foundation

Stray Kids RPF:

the book of us: electricity - Seungjin highschool au, they meet by chance on twitter during Seungmin's second to last year of highschool; just a very real down-to-earth story about teenagers, not knowing what the future holds and about not living the teenage dream; it also has a very eloquent writing style imo

pathos prairie - Minsung modern au, slice-of-life, in which Han has OCD and struggles with internalized homophobia, very down-to-earth, has a reoccurring them of the number 3 which ties in with the OCD plot, has its tender moments but also gets quite heavy

Merlin:

The Student Prince - modern university au with magic Merthur, where Merlin is the most powerful wizard of his generation and supposed to protect Arthur, but Arthur is also his roommate and really fucking annoying (I linked the podfic bc it's very lovely, but you can obviously also read it)

FayJay's Merlin fics are generally very good, if you want to check them out after the Student Prince

feel free to also check out my collections for more recs or shoot me a message, I have lots of more fics to rec that I haven't bookmarked yet (bc alas I'm super bad at bookmarking, I usually forget):

1 Fics that rewired my brain | Archive of Our Own - some of my favourite fics of all time that I consider to be masterpieces in their own right

2 Rain's Favourite Fics | Archive of Our Own - all my bookmarks sorted into subcollections by ship or fandom

4 Rain's Podfic Collection | Archive of Our Own - most of the podfics I've listened to, but unfiltered, so doesn't necessarily mean that I enjoyed them

[nothing-to-see-around-here]

I had a dream where Techno was SCP-035 and Phil was SCP-049 and it had always lived rent free in my brain cus... yeah. I totally don't ship the scps and that's why I can't stop thinking of Techno using his knowledge of many languages to flirt with him and Phil understanding every word but just trying to act unfaced

[gravesung]

WELCOME TO SHELTER ISLAND.

There is a city in upstate New York, glamoured and hidden from the rest of the US, where magic flourishes in secret. No, it isn’t the small coastal strip of land in the same state with the same name. Shelter Island, this Shelter Island, is accessible to strangers only by accident. Fell asleep on the R train in NYC? Wound up there inexplicably one morning when you opened a door that wasn't there before? Teleported in from another universe on accident and got stuck there because the City won't let you go? Possibilities are endless! 

Shelter Island is a reclusive place, welcoming its own but near-impossible to seek out. Some theorize that the city chooses its residents. Some chalk it up to magical anomalies. No matter their stance, those who live there agree that in some strange, unexplainable way, the City is alive.

Genre(s)

This is an ongoing labor of love by myself and Reuben over at @harerazor. By design, it's something of a crossroads between worlds, and its multiversal influence led to it becoming a patchwork of different cultures, communities, aesthetics and functions.

Shelter Island as a setting contains many possibilities for stories of different genres. While no theme is off-limits, some are stronger and easier to pull on than others. For example, here are a few of the inspirations for building the setting:

early 2000’s techno-kitsch (l33tsp34k, over the top hacker counterculture, etc.)

gothic americana

absurdist comedy & satire about the modern age (capitalism/advertisement culture, memes, life on the web)

uncanny-valley atmospheric horror (think Night Vale, The Magnus Archives, SCP, etc.)

street crime, gangs & the mafia (white collar crime AND blue collar crime)

class warfare and political intrigue

multicultural fairy folklore (the woods)

Residence

Those who end up in Shelter Island by accident are henceforth welcome into the city, so long as they don’t enter with the intention of exposing it. The City knows. Trust that it knows. Most of the citydwellers were born there, but every year there is a steady trickle of new residents as well.

Because of this, there are New Resident Info Desks peppered around common entry points throughout the city. Here, you can get temporary housing, an ID card, and other resources to help get you started as a citizen.

Geography and Demography

Despite the name, Shelter Island is actually not an island. Legends say the city once sat in the middle of a lake. After some geographic event over a century ago, the water around it receded, leaving a sunken halo around the city. The name stuck, however, and now it’s considered a bit of an in-joke among residents.

Shelter Island is laid out like a three-ring target. The central “bullseye” (called citycenter) contains the 1% — both literally and figuratively. The middle ring (called cityproper), home to roughly 40% of the population, is made up of suburbs, apartments, shopping districts, and other highly metropolitan middle-class neighborhoods. The outer circle (the Ring), containing nearly 60% of the population, is shoddily constructed and tightly packed with buildings, alleys, and people.

OTHER INFO: FULL SETTING GUIDE PINTEREST BOARD PLAYLIST

A Note from Raine

All of the characters in my muse roster (including on my other blogs) either exist in this setting natively or have a verse within it. Shelter Island is the ever-evolving product of many, many years of work by Reu and me, and I'd absolutely love to craft SI verses for your muses if you're interested!! For those of you who have dipped your toes in, thank you so much and welcome to hell. For others: Come on in, the water's fine(?)!

Addendum:

Since SI is an insulated and secret city that exists independently of the world around it, it can fit into pretty much any canon that could include an urban area! For example: I've chattered with some folks about what it would look like in MHA-Earth with quirks involved, and for my JJKs it would be super fun to work cursed spirits & sorcery into the mix. It's always a place containing unusual magic that doesn't exist in the rest of the setting, but that doesn't mean the rest of the setting can't also be supernatural in some way. The only constant is that it's hidden from the rest of the world and frequently draws new people into its fold.

Happy hunting. It's getting close to the New Year at the time of reposting this guide; make sure your homes are well-insulated before the Turning. You don't want to be stuck outside.

[bubble-popping]

day 53 with more scp au! it's not as fully fleshed out as I like but i wanted to introduce Techno <3

Techno is a giant, sentient hog-like SCP brought in years ago by the foundation and more or less forgotten in his cell. He's hostile towards any human whatsoever and needs to be sedated by A LOT of tranquilizers. Dream while working at the foundation happens to pass by Techno's cell and he's curious abt the SCP and tries to learn more about him from the overseeing researcher. He finds out that the researcher listed had transferred and no longer even attempts to check on Techno. He gets himself appointed as the new head researcher for Techno along with his assistant Punz.

This entire time, Techno just bangs on the walls of his cell and yells. He's constantly agitated so Dream tries using music to calm him down. He'd convinced higher-ups to give him clearance for it provided the funds came from Dream's pay check. Some music seems to make Techno more mad and some make him relax, but he's still clearly on guard. They both try talking along with the relaxing music to get him adjusted to human speech.

They introduce new items into the cell like a ball, blankets, and pillows all to make his cell more comfortable and stimulating. Eventually, once Techno clearly is comfortable with these items, they try to introduce a person into the cell who's holding the same kind of stuff. Techno sniffs them--they've found that Techno mostly goes by smell--but Techno doesn't like them, especially not when they make their fear obvious and Techno lashes out and then eats them. They mark the test a failure, but Dream makes a comment about introducing food into the cell.

They drop in several different types of food, mostly meats, and finds mixed results. Techno HATES pork, but he likes steak and mutton. He also, strangely enough, REALLY likes potatoes. The trials go on until Techno doesn't interact with them at all, which they cite as an indication of satiation.

Since these experiments have been more of a personal, passion project, Dream has had to procure many of these things from his own pockets, so his income is taking a major hit. As disposable of units they are, D-class personnel are still expensive to procure if the research isn't recognized by upper levels. The two decide to bypass all that headache, and clearance, and start conducting trials themselves. He retests the previous experiment by introducing himself (Punz tries to convince him to let them go inside, but Dream's insistent to take responsibility) in the cell with a blanket and potatoes. Techno is hesitant at first, until Dream speaks and it's clear he recognizes Dream's voice. He smells him and seems to immensely relax, taking Dream's offering of potatoes and eating them raw.

Punz has to stay in the observatory deck and document everything that happens.

After more trials like this, Dream feels comfortable enough to have Punz in the 'cell.' Techno is very wary of them at first, even more so than the D-class, which Dream writes down as potential evidence for SCPs being able to 'sense' each other. With potatoes in hand, though, Techno does approach and take one. A success, in Dream's opinion.

Eventually, Techno is even friendly with the both of them and Dream teaches him sign language so they can communicate. This part is exactly what Dream is so interested in, being able to actually interact with the SCPs as if they were human. One of the first things Dream asks is about Techno's history, where he comes from, how he got here, all that good stuff. From what Dream can understand, somehow Techno got transported from his home in the 'Nether' and was soon caught by the Foundation after, understandably, making quite the ruckus.

Most of the au is spent with the three getting more comfortable and familiar with each other. However, conflict arises when some other researchers see Dream's work and think he's trying to 'train' Techno into fighting for him...

[nomsfaultau]

imagine scp The Blade trying to take like a required ethics class for the major he’s paying for via cheating at gambling, with the laptop he stole for online classes, while lying to all his friends and professors about being a human + forging documents to back that up, plus constantly murdering the Foundation MTF squads sent in to capture him. Like. The sheer irony

[cookie-nom-nom]

Realized it’s probably just easier to put him here in case he’s eaten again. I like to think he’s just chillaxing on a beach on the qsmp, drinking a potato smoothie while wretched plot angst happens in the background

......i was so excited to share beach techno I got qsmp and osmp mixed up (o and q look the same) and completely missed human techno. plz disregard I'm illiterate 😅

Tumblr ate your ask, this is so tragic I never got to experience Beach Techno :sadcat:

[gravesung-moving]

WELCOME TO SHELTER ISLAND.

There is a city in upstate New York, glamoured and hidden from the rest of the US, where magic flourishes in secret. No, it isn’t the small coastal strip of land in the same state with the same name. Shelter Island, this Shelter Island, is accessible to strangers only by accident. Fell asleep on the R train in NYC? Wound up there inexplicably one morning when you opened a door that wasn't there before? Teleported in from another universe on accident and got stuck there because the City won't let you go? Possibilities are endless! 

Shelter Island is a reclusive place, welcoming its own but near-impossible to seek out. Some theorize that the city chooses its residents. Some chalk it up to magical anomalies. No matter their stance, those who live there agree that in some strange, unexplainable way, the City is alive.

Genre(s)

Shelter Island as a setting contains many possibilities for stories of different genres. While no theme is off-limits, some are stronger and easier to pull on than others. For example, here are a few of the inspirations for building the setting:

early 2000’s techno-kitsch (leetspeak, over the top hacker counterculture, etc.)

Gothic Americana

absurdist comedy & satire about the modern age (capitalism/advertisement culture, memes, life on the web)

uncanny-valley atmospheric horror (think Night Vale, The Magnus Archives, SCP, etc.)

street crime, gangs & the mafia (peaky blinders, many many mob movies, six of crows, etc.)

Residence

Those who end up in Shelter Island by accident are henceforth welcome into the city, so long as they don’t enter with the intention of exposing it. The City knows. Trust that it knows. Most of the citydwellers were born there, but every year there is a steady trickle of new residents as well.

Because of this, there are New Resident Info Desks peppered around common entry points throughout the city. Here, you can get temporary housing, an ID card, and other resources to help get you started as a citizen. Geography and Demography

Despite the name, Shelter Island is actually not an island. Legends say the city once sat in the middle of a lake. After some geographic event over a century ago, the water around it receded, leaving a sunken halo around the city. The name stuck, however, and now it’s considered a bit of an in-joke among residents.

Shelter Island is laid out like a three-ring target. The central “bullseye” (called citycenter) contains the 1% — both literally and figuratively. The middle ring (called cityproper), home to roughly 40% of the population, is made up of suburbs, apartments, shopping districts, and other highly metropolitan middle-class neighborhoods. The outer circle (the Ring), containing nearly 60% of the population, is shoddily constructed and tightly packed with buildings, alleys, and people.

OTHER INFO: FULL SETTING GUIDE PINTEREST BOARD PLAYLIST

A Note from Raine

All of the characters in my muse roster (including on my other blogs) either exist in this setting natively or have a verse within it. Shelter Island is the ever-evolving product of many, many years of work by Reu and me, and I'd absolutely love to craft SI verses for your muses if you're interested!! Come on in, the water's fine(?)!

[i-identify-as-an-ominous-threat]

Hey! Sorry if this is too abrupt, but I have some questions about Into The Gimmick Verse. Just some stuff about what it will look like, and what you’re looking for in participants.

So far, it's looking to be an animated tv series with a movie special we'll be showing on youtube, twitch and tumblr on my main accounts (Techno-Danger). It'll be an anthology, slice of life series where you'll see different gimmick blogs hanging out together in different scenarios. I'm personally having fun giving random ideas to them at midnight after no sleep. However none of this is confirmed or official until we finish making our first ep and see how it turns out. We've got about 80 people so far working on this in some way or another. Its also got a bunch of SCP stuff that i know nothing about so make sure to ask @the-scp-list-of-ominous-threats about ITGV as well since we've split credit on this, i made the idea and invited everyone, they made the discord and helped get the ball rolling.

[dzthenerd490]

File: Harmony and Horror - Magical Sofia

SCP#: ALV

Code Name: Presenting, The New Magical Sofia! 

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: A single SCP-ALV instance is kept at Site-AA within the anomalous technology storage area. It is sealed within a magnetically sealed coffin that can only be unlocked with a specialized key. The Foundation security unit holding the key is to never be on the same floor as SCP-ALV until testing has been requested. In the event of a Containment breach the security unit is to either evacuate outside of Site-AA or head to the nearest insite safety bunker depending on the scenario. Any testing with SCP-ALV is to be approved by at least three Level 3 Foundation staff or higher. 

SCP-ALV instances found in the wild are to be exterminated by Mobile Task Force Dionysus-3 “The Party Package”. A techno exorcist must always be present to ensure the SCP-ALV instance cannot repair or repower itself after neutralization. MTF Command are to utilize satellites to detect when an SCP-ALV has been activated. Unfortunately, this is the only way to hunt SCP-ALV instances as the Foundation has had embarrassing failed raids of family houses that had regular non-anomalous Magical Sofia toys. 

Description: SCP-ALV is an anomalous variant of the Magical Sofia doll, one of the latest toys created by Group of Interest: Harmony Toys. It should be noted that the Magical Sofia doll is a more modern and advanced iteration of Sofia the Singing Marionette toy created in 1985. Though it's probably not correct to call it a variant as the chances of a Magical Sophia doll being an SCP-ALV instance is 75%. Regardless, an SCP-ALV instance is fully sentient and incredibly hostile as well as sadistic towards children. Each SCP-ALV utilizes their functions to torment and kill children, then when they are done, they wander the streets to be found by other children, starting the cycle all over again. 

Like the regular toy, SCP-ALV has state of the air listening devices, tracking cameras, robotic limbs with flexible joints, motion detection, and audio projection. SCP-ALV instances utilize these tools to mock and hunt their prey in their own house, as well as to gain sympathy from children to lure into traps. What makes SCP-ALV anomalous is that it is not possessed by the souls of Martin Greywinder’s victims. Instead, SCP-ALV is an anomalous device in that it traps the souls of those it kills to take back to Harmony toys for experimentation. There is no known paratech or thaumaturgic sigils within SCP-ALV that should allow this so how this is possible is unknown. It should be noted it is for this reason that a techno exorcist is to always be present so that any and all souls will be released upon destruction. 

SCP-ALV was discovered in 1993 when Group of Interest: M&A Harmony Toy's rebranded to just Harmony Toys under its now sole owner Arthur Greywhinder, originally thought to be dead, turned out to be alive albeit badly disfigured. Due to his popularity and “miraculous recovery” the Harmony Toy’s brand was saved, and its stocks soared as well as sales as soon as toy production started up again. SCP-ALV was one of their first products though scrutiny quickly befell the company due to children disappearing. The company only survived in the public eye to this day due to winning every lawsuit overwhelmingly. 

There is no evidence to confirm this, but it is believed that Arthur Greywinder is actually Person of Interest: Martin Greywinder, wearing his dead brother’s skin. It is known that Martin Greywinder made a deal with Entity of Interest: Satan and used the power from said deal to make his toys so lifelike at the cost of his family’s souls. Though he was presumed dead during the 1985 tragedy as his remains were found the same day and house several of his anomalous toys were found. 

This is unfortunately the worst-case scenario as if Martin Greywinder really died and came back to life that means he is a Hell-on-Earth Demon. For those that don’t know Hell-on-Earth Demon were once humans who made deals with the devil and either accidently or purposely became corrupted as a result. Entity of Interest: Satan often allows them to go back to earth in exchange for becoming a demon that will forever consume souls for both themselves and him. These types of demons are the most independent and least loyal but ironically are the best source of income of souls for Satan. They are also extremely powerful and can possess anomalous abilities on par with Reality Benders. In other words, they defy even the laws of the anomalous world, which could explain how SCP-ALV instances can steal souls without having the needed Para technology or thaumaturgy of any kind.

If Arthur Greywinder really is the Hell-on-Earth Demon Martin Greywinder he must be located and destroyed as soon as possible. There is also the theory that Author Greywinder just went insane and is now creating sadistic robots that torture children like his brother, but nothing is confirmed.

.

SCP: Horror Movie Files Hub

[nameshifter]

SCP-8000 contest entries abridged daily

(Except, like, not well)

Wikidot still hates Russia, and I while I can't vote/participate in SCP-8000 contest, I still want to interact with it. So here's a semi-daily series of abridges I'm gonna make for each 8k entry, whenever I finish reading one (Bear in mind, I work fulltime). Entries aren't gonna be covered in any specific order, and with 151 unique entries there's zero chance I'm gonna be able to cover everything.

Placeholder/Cimmerian/Blank/Billith - Eight-Ball Two off-sets, a few crosslinks, fewer collapsibles Relevant GOIs: MC&D, Serpent's Hand, as well as some mentions of MCF

Beginning is a separate off-set to the rest of the article, and outside of introducing us to the smug arsehole that is Director Ryoto Hishakaku, also informs the readers that 8000 is, in fact, stolen

Second off-set begins with a rather techno-babbly special/converse containment procedures and description, typical of Placeholder McD. In essence, the object is a magic eight-ball on thaumic "steroids", acting as a powerful predictive supercomputer with enough precognition to look into people's consciousness and predict any inquiries before they are voiced, among other things. An incredibly useful artifact, which is why when O5 catches the word of the ball being stolen by an unknown party and chew Director Hishakaku out for letting it get stolen. No one is happy

Except for one Dr. Danill Sokolsky. He informs the council that the item can be retrived, as he has a contingency scheme, and, provided the right people, can get it relatively easy.

The right people are as follows: Ethics Committee member Dr. Cimmerian, Researcher Harknesss (who I only know as Billith's character with very high CRV), Dr. Wettle of SCP-7000 (negative luck sink), Dr. Moncier (I've not done my homework, I don't know who she is), Dr. Placeholder MCD (Esoteric Polymath, proficient in pataphysics), as well as Agent S. of MC&D (an inventor/creator of anomalous spy and infiltration tech)

Oh, and Hishakaku is there. About 20% of the article is spent dunking on him, I'd be remiss if I didn't do it a few times

Bulk of the article is spent covering an infiltration into the Wanderer's Library in search of the eight-ball. In particular, there's some fun interactions between the characters and their surroundings in the Library's Casino (read: they wreak havoc), find a gigantic place under the Wanderer's Library (aptly named Underlibrary), which stores, among other things, every book from every lost non-anomalous library as well as a talking Lighthouse of Alexandria.

They also awaken the serpent. The Serpent. The One after which the Hand is named after. That Serpent. Chaos ensues.

Wettle's bad luck ruffles Casino's feathers by making every Casino Goer win absolute jackpots, Agent S turns out to be a reality bender, affiliated with a number of other benders calling themselves House of Stars (I've not done my homework) and quickly dashes away, Cimmerian gets transported back to Ancient Egypt, eight-ball in hand, while the remaining group is reprimanded by the Casino and Librarians for causing a mess.

In time, everything is fixed, including damage to the library, as well as Cimmerian teleported back into an appropriate era, still with the eight-ball, and all is well... Except it went missing again, because of course it did.

Thanks to Cimmerian, Hishakaku ultimately gets demoted (which is immensely satisfying, considering events of 6488 and 7579) and while the foundation doesn't have their magic ball, they do, however, get rather cinematic footage of events surrounding the sentient eight-ball, seemingly made by Agent S. herself, including final scenes of the two on a beach

Tl;dr: A sentient ball of immense magical and clairvoyant powers goes missing. Six foundation researchers, Type Green MC&D agent and That Arsehole from SCP-6488 go to the Wanderer's Library to retrieve it. They trash the place, get one of their own sent back in time, temporarily retrieve the eight-ball only to lose it again not seconds later.

[nothing-to-see-around-here]

uh.... I just woke up from a nap- I dreamt Technoblade as scp-049, idk where that came from cus I haven't been in the scp fandom in like YEARS lmao

It was literally just straight up boar Techno but with 049's outfit, i don't even remember what tf happened in the dream- What I do remember is that Techno's voice had a french accent for some reason.