#Self Insert Fanfic | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

di-writes-stuff · 20 days

Text

So It Goes…

Jake “Hangman” Seresin x Reader

Chapter 1

A/N: This Barbie can’t stop thinking about Glen Powell!

TW: Not much, cursing, alcohol, suggestive content. Not quite smut, but close.

It's been a long time since you've been human. Since you've strayed from the well honed weapon you've been so meticulously trained to become. Always ready for the next order, the next mission, ready to die. It's never been more apparent than when you picked up the phone, heard that cold, stern voice on the other end.

"You've been called back to Top Gun."

The readiness with which you accept the order would scare you if it hadn't become so commonplace the second you signed on the dotted line. Married yourself to a military that couldn't care less if you live or die.

After all, there's always gonna be cocky youths from shitty homes eager to prove themselves. Be great, be something for the first time in their life.

You just actually managed to do it. Become great. Incredible, really. One of the most talented pilots in the Navy. So good, in fact, that you're neck and neck with the other best pilot in the Navy.

Jake fucking Seresin.

It's not as if you don't like him. He's horribly arrogant, and quite possibly the most insufferably conceited person you've ever met.

But, he's Jake. And as humiliating, practically degrading as it is, he worked on you. Stupidly well. The grins he'd send your way anytime you dared look at him. The lame one liners he'd try, the ones that'd make you smile even as you gave him endless amounts of shit for it.

The genuine moments, few and far between, when the facade dropped, when he was a person rather than a caricature.

A person who wanted you.

You'd convinced yourself it was just sexual later.

You'd reveled in the idea that it wasn't in the moment.

But it wouldn't work. It couldn't work. Not when your career hung in the balance. The one thing you'd ever built for yourself. The one thing you'd be risking to be with him. It'd be fraternization.

Forbidden.

And really, you couldn't pass it off as just sex, no matter how hard you tried. Not with the way he'd looked at you the first and last time you ever woke up in his bed. And so it ended.

Now you just have to hope to God he won't be there to start it up again.

……………………………………………………………………………………

The steps up to the Hard Deck are almost more familiar than your house's porch at this point. The creaky, aged wood beneath your boots, bowing under your weight after too many years of use.

As you walk in, the atmosphere is busy, but not uncomfortably so. Music floating from a jukebox, Penny at the bar ringing the bell to signal someone breaking one of her beloved rules. And of course, at the back of the bar bent over a pool table.

Jake.

The rest of your squadron is there too, but you couldn't care less. Not when like magnets clicking together, his emerald eyes flash up to meet yours, a grin appearing on his face as he stands up straight, propping his cue against the table.

Damn, he looks good. After years in the military, the whole "men in uniform" thing had become lost on you. Disenchanted. But...wow. His shirt is adorned with different service ribbons, all indicators of his numerous achievements.

You're even with him, something you're sure he'll manage to gripe about later.

"Vulture." He greets you with the call-sign he coined as he walks over, a smirk plastered on his face when he stops in front of you. You still remember how proud he'd been when he came up with that.

He was beside you at this very bar, leaning in as he explained it to Penny like a kid showing off a toy. "If she's in the sky, something's dead below." It was cool, you'd admit. Not to his face, of course.

"Hangman." You respond, trying to keep your voice even, dry, safe, despite the smile fighting its way onto your face.

He gives you an amused look, leaning against the wall beside you and staring down at you, his eyes dancing across your face like they can't pick a feature to focus on. "You know, sweetheart, you could muster up a little more enthusiasm."

You roll your eyes at the pet name, trying to come off annoyed. Yet, the smile wins over, spreading across your face as you look up at him. "Give me a reason to." You quip back, falling into a pattern with him as simple as breathing.

"We're friends, aren't we?" He asks, but he knows that's putting it simply. Overly simply. The layers to your relationship are innumerable, each different, half of them contradicting each other. Friends, co-workers, competitors... and something more. Something you're not sure there's a word for.

You're not willing to use the one that seems to fit. Four letters and dangerous.

"Is that what we're calling it?" You ask before you process that you shouldn't. It's risky to even skirt the subject. Openly discuss what you're both already painfully aware of. Because he'll see it as a green light. A gleaming sign that tells him he has a shot with you.

And that, more than anything, that's what he wants. What he's wanted since he met you.

"Bending the rules?" He asks cockily, ready to swoop in, widen the gray area that you just brought up.

"No." You answer sternly, feeling like a teacher reprimanding your rowdiest student. You walk past him, hoping he doesn't follow. Denying him gets exhausting, especially when deep you, you don't want to.

He trails after you quickly, knowing you're heading to the bar before you even make the turn.

“You know, I’m more stubborn than you are.” He says as he slides into the seat next to you, each move he makes smooth, practiced, even. “I’ll wear you down.” He adds, making you snort.

“Well, since you haven’t yet…” You trail off, knowing exactly what’s coming next. You walked into it, and a small part of you did it on purpose. For the reminder. The flashback to that perfect, drunken night.

You choose not to dwell on the morning that followed.

“Didn’t I?” He asks, lowering his voice, a smirk on his lips that makes shivers run down your spine. You sigh, rolling your eyes.

“That doesn’t count.” You answer just as quietly, stiffening up a little as he leans in even closer to hear.

He just smiles, leaning back a little, shockingly trying not to draw too much attention. “No take-backs, doll.” Every word, every response from his mouth is like he’s reading from a script. Perfectly delivered, perfectly timed.

Perfect.

It’s getting hard to remember why you won’t just give in.

“You’d never let me forget it, anyway.” You grumble back, propping your chin in your hand and making certain not to look at him, not to get caught in those green eyes like a fly in a web.

He scoffs, feigning offense as he leans against the bar top, trying to get you to look at him. And since you can only be strong so long, you give him what he wants. A dazzling smile spreads across his face when you turn to him, the tiniest glimpse of a matching one on yours. “Now why would you want to? You certainly seemed to enjoy yourself.” He’s got a horribly smug look on his face as he watches your eyes widen at the brazen volume he’s speaking at.

“Piss off.” You quip back with no real anger, looking away pointedly to hide the amused smirk on your face, the blush coating your cheeks as you recall that night.

His mouth right by your ear, hot breath fanning over your shoulder as he interlaced your hands, holding you firm as he whispered softly to you.

“That’s it, baby. Let me hear ya.”

A soft kiss to your neck, then a searing one pressed to your parted lips.

“Doing so good for me. Just like that.”

The way his hands roamed over every inch of your body, carding through your hair, pulling your head back and giving him easy access to the sensitive skin of your neck. Then to your waist, like an anchor as a dent began to form where the bed frame was slamming against the wall. Your hips next, his hands staking their claim before his mouth, pressing kisses to each, slowly sinking lower down the length of your body, closer to-

You snap out of it as, similarly to then, his voice sounds close to your ear, his southern drawl more apparent the lower his voice goes.

“Reminiscing?” He asks, and you can practically hear the shit eating grin on his face. You look back to him, your faces impossibly close as he looks down at you, something more than pride glimmering in his eyes.

There’s no point in lying to him, he already knows he’s right. Besides, you’re sure he’s looked back on that night just as much as you have. Barracks get lonely, after all.

“This can’t happen again.” You say softly, hating how serious you have to be. Despising the way his face falls ever so slightly. A fracture in the act. A display of humanity, of proof that there’s something real, something tangible to this game you two play.

“We could make it work.“ He says, and the certainty in his voice isn’t just a byproduct of his ego. No, he really, truly believes it.

God, you wish you could too.

You sigh, the air around you suddenly feeling heavy. “No, we can’t.” Your voice is weak, like you’re begging him to prove you wrong. “We’re colleagues. That’s it.” You say with a finality you hate.

He just nods along, watching as you flag down Penny, ordering a drink. He quickly pulls a couple crumpled bills from his pocket, sliding them across the counter, his eyes locked on yours all the while.

“We’ve never just been colleagues, darlin’.” He says confidently. And he’s right.

You can’t take back what you did, and you certainly can’t change how you feel.

“Just…don’t make this harder than it has to be.” You say as you slide off the stool, knowing if you stay here longer, let his words make you dizzier than any liquor here, you’ll wake up in a bed that isn’t your own, and he’ll have won.

The nod he gives you says yes, but the look in his eyes speaks nothing but the truth.

The two of you could never be easy.

#fanfic #fanfiction #fanfic writer #fanfiction writer #jake seresin #hangman #jake seresin x reader #hangman x reader #jake seresin x you #hangman x you #self insert fanfiction #self insert fanfic #top gun maverick #top gun #smut

44 notes · View notes

harmfulb1tch · 2 years

Text

College bets

Fandom: Indiana Jones

Ship: Indiana Jones x reader

Warnings: swearing, slight mention of smut

Requested by: @groovy-lady

Summary: Indy asks your hand in marriage and the students of the collage you work with couldn’t be happier.

-----------

It was no secret that Doctor Jones and Doctor (Y/L/N) were MADLY in love with each other. They both shared a passion for discovery and history. Dr. Jones taught Archeology and Dr. (Y/L/N) taught world mythology. They had went on archeological missions together and had dug together in many archeological sites. They were always attached by the hip, they always had lunch together either in one of their classrooms or at the cafe, every time a student wanted to talk to Dr. Jones in his classroom, Dr. (Y/L/N) was there and vice versa. It was rarer to see the couple alone than together.

If you asked the university’s students, they would tell you that these two were the “it” couple. Since the students watched Dr. (Y/L/N) and Dr. Jones interact with each other one time she came into his classroom to ask him something regarding work, they all shipped them nonstop. There were rumors regarding both of them, they ranged from seeing the kissing, to having sex on a classroom and seeing them go on dates. Of course these were rumors and rumors only.

It wasn’t until Dr. Jones mentioned his partner in one of his classes, asking the students what he should buy her in his next date. He was always so professional but yet so casual with his students, that’s why they all loved him. Immediately all of the students (mostly nosy people who had a crush on him) started asking questions about who his partner was and of course, after a lot of insisting, he gave in and revealed that these two were actually dating. You swore you heard cheers from across the hall in the other classroom, but you had no idea what had happened until Indy told you he had revealed your relationship. It was fine, it wasn’t like you cared if the students knew you two were dating. You both were in a committed relationship and had nothing to hide.

Everyone in the college was very happy for you and, surprisingly, you weren’t in trouble for being in a relationship with your co-worker. The students shipped you so much before that they were always excited and asked both you and Indy questions in class. Questions such as “Where is Dr. Jones taking you on your date?” “Have you guys watched the stars at night as a date?” “Do you guys live together?” “Have you been to his house?” almost everyday came up before your class started. They were all surprisingly respectful towards you and Indy and never really asked any improper questions.

As time passed, the two of you always went to work together, so the students assumed you both were, in fact, living together. And when more than a year passed, a new question came up amongst the rest in Indy’s classroom “When are you going to propose to Dr. (Y/L/N)?”. Every time he heard that question he just looked with confidence towards the student that asked him and he just didn’t answer it, starting or continuing the class as if no question had been asked. It wasn’t as if he didn’t want to ask your hand in marriage, he just didn’t know if either of you were prepared for that commitment. And, although he would and always will deny it, he was VERY scared of rejection and he didn’t want you to say no. The more time passed, the more frequently that question came up. He usually just shrugged it off and thought nothing of it until one day he overheard a conversation between some students that really made him question wether or not to ask you.

“Hey! 20 bucks. I’m betting 20 bucks that Dr. Jones is going to ask Dr. (Y/N/L) to marry him in less than two months!”

“Bullshit, he is never going to ask her. I don’t think their relationship will last. 50 bucks that they are breaking up before the end of the year.”

“No way dude! The are madly in love and are TOTALLY getting married, but I think he is going to ask her this month. I’m betting 35$ that he is asking her this month”

The students all shut up when they saw Indiana walking down the hall but immediately looked at him when he saw their other professor walk up to him and start making small talk. When you held his hand unconsciously while walking, you could hear the students say small “aw’s” and “I’m totally winning that bet”. When you asked Indy about that bet they were talking about, he said it was just some joke the students were talking about before she arrived and shrugged it off.

After that encounter, he really started to question how, when and where to ask you to marry him. The first thing he did was buy a ring, he bought you a beautiful white gold ring with the biggest diamond he could afford (which ended up being a huge gem). He thought it was best to ask you as soon as possible to get it over with, by that he meant his anxiety, he wanted it to be special for both of you but wanted to do it as soon as possible to get an answer from you. He really believed that you were going to say yes, but there was never really knowing until he asked you. He also planned on asking you in the college’s library, since that’s where you two met.

One day, he asked you to go with him to the library, it wasn’t a really weird request for him to do, since you two spent the most time there, together, and reading. You really didn’t know what he was doing but when the two of you reached the center of the library and just stopped there, while Indy was hugging your waist softly looking down at you with his greenish eyes sweetly, you knew something was going on.

“Darling, I love you. I thought I would live my whole live doing just two things: going from place to place digging up buried treasure and teaching in the four walls of my classroom. I don’t think I would be the man I am today if it weren’t for you, doll.” he said sweetly, with a soft voice as two not disturb the students that were studying and working in the library.

“Aw Indy, thank you! I love you too, so much.” You said, hugging his waist and pressing your head into his chest. After a few moments, he pulled away from the hug and grabbing your hand, he knelt down on one knee, that is when you realized what was going on. Happy tears filled you eyes as you looked at the man before you, the same man that has made you feel so special for almost two years. Some people may think it was too soon for him to ask your hand in marriage, but from the moment you two met, you both knew you would be spending the rest of your like together.

“Y/N, will you marry me?” you nodded you head furiously while crying.

“YES!” Everyone in the library, professors and students alike started clapping, whistling and congratulating you both as you kissed.

“I TOLD YOU THEY WERE GETTING MARRIED IN LESS THAN A MONTH!” was heard as two other students sighed and gave money to the student that shouted that. You could help but laugh hugging Indy again.

#Indiana Jones #indiana jones x reader #Indiana #fanfic #xreader #xreaderfanfic #x reader #fanfiction #self insert fanfic #self insert #harrison ford #harrison fords characters

505 notes · View notes

vermillioncrown · 21 days

Text

dpnf ch 11 outtake: observational study of nocturnal fauna

Ch 11 outtake for 'Domestication Protocols for Nocturnal Fauna,' the in-between of Tim and Korvin's two scenes. Tim's sure he’s learning Korvin at good speed. And Korvin seems to have learned him back.

back w the explicit stuff lol but i really wanted to explore how navigating an asexual relationship is very much per individual, no one-size-fits-all theory.

after this, there's just one more outtake (roz and i are close to finishing it!)

#dc fanfic #self insert fanfic #on dpnf #phd-verse #verm bits #yeah this is the outtake where i was trying to figure out one of the tags #and realized it's just me and two other people #well. here we go. enjoy #just me this time ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

19 notes · View notes

write-and-wander · 9 months

Text

Touch: Chapter 7

Pairing: Kylo Ren x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Swearing, angst, and a new version of the sequels

Word count: 7.6K

Author’s note: Everything comes down to this- the final chapter :)

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)

Chapter 7: Journey's End

He’s searching for someone. Who? He’s not quite sure anymore. A Kenobi not yet brought to the dark side, now running loose, should be his enemy. Another target to hunt down before the resistance gains another leg up. A companion gifted to him by the force, however- someone who needs him just as much as he needs her- that’s something entirely different altogether. If he is meant to rule the galaxy with her by his side, then he now has no way of protecting her. What if they find her first? What if she strays from her purpose- from our purpose?

He knows that if you were to turn against him, you could very well be his downfall. What if I don’t have the strength to stop her?

He paces the room, his mind racing through multitudes of possibilities and their solutions. The tablet still sits open on the table, the red indicator for the missing ship’s tracker still lying to him. You are gone. And he has no way of finding you. Unless…

The force has brought us together before, he thinks, focusing on you; on the shift in the atmosphere- in the force itself- when you were present. He calls out to the force.

And it answers him.

As if rounding a corner, you walk in, your name immediately tumbling from his lips.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

You’re walking- almost jogging- through the resistance base, discerning faces and scanning over heads in the search for Poe. Come on, come on, where is he? You pull a couple of different people aside, asking them if they’ve seen Dameron, only to be met with shrugs and wild guesses. You start to make your way out of the main rooms and begin to weave through hallways, praying to the force that you don’t get yourself lost in the maze of the bustling base. You come to a fork and stop for a moment before you feel the force pulling you to the left. Rounding the corner, you stop dead in your tracks at the sound of your name and the sight of your abandoned Commander.

“Where are you?” He asks right away, his voice gentle.

Why would the force do this now, of all times? “I need to go,” you say curtly. You try to move past him, but he steps over, blocking your way.

“You were so close,” he says low, his brown eyes boring into yours.

You pause and take a breath to speak, but you can’t seem to find anything to say.

“Please, come back to me,” he pleads, his voice breaking, “I feel so lost.”

You shake your head, taking a step back. He closes the gap, his face just inches from yours.

“Come home,” he whispers, bringing his arms up to your sides. He lowers his eyes to level with yours and moves to grab your shoulders.

Just before his hands touch you, the man right in front of your face snaps to Poe Dameron, whose hands are now holding your shoulders.

“Hey, you!” he greets with a smile.

You jump, breathing hard.

“Woah, woah, hey-” his voice drops as he immediately switches gears, “you okay, Kenobi?”

Relaxing into his grasp, you let his strong arms keep you steady as you collect yourself.

“Yeah, yeah-”

“Deep breaths,” he interjects.

You nod, swallowing hard. “I need you to come with me to Coruscant.”

“Just me?”

You nod again.

“Why?”

“I have something you need.” You watch excitement grow in his face as he nods, taking your hand.

“Well, then, what are we waiting for?”

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

You land on Coruscant shortly before Poe does, as he had followed you closely on the trip over. You land further off than you normally would, attempting to divert attention to from your house.

When you walk in, you realize that this time, the house feels stale. There’s a noticeable layer of dust on the surface- this place hasn’t been so well kept. Did Vilya just… stop taking care of this place?

Poe lands even further yet, and waits a while to follow you into your home.

“So,” he starts, looking around at your home. “this yours, or?”

“Yeah,” you answer quick, focused on what you came for. You head straight into your parent’s bedroom and withdraw the wayfinder from its hiding spot for the last time.

Poe is looking around when you return. You hold it out towards him. His eyes widen.

“Here.”

“How the hell did you manage to get this from them?” He asks with a grin, taking it from your hands to inspect it.

“I didn’t.”

He freezes, looking up at you. “Then how do you have it?” Though his words form a question, his sudden shift to a cold tone frames it more like a statement.

“It’s a long story, Poe.”

“Oh, we’ve got time,” he retorts. He pockets the wayfinder.

Staring back at him, your expression shifts from nervous to hurt. Does he not trust me? I guess I didn’t think about how I would explain this to him. How do I even begin to explain everything?

“You’re lucky I trust you,” he adds, pulling up a chair to sit and motioning for you to follow suit, “or you wouldn’t still be standing. Now talk.”

You nod, sitting down in front of him. You know you can’t blame him for his reaction- any person with half a brain would respond in kind. You’ve never seen Poe this guarded before though- especially with you- and it’s unsettling, to say the least. Shaking off your discomfort, you collect yourself.

“Remember how my parents left me a few gifts after they disappeared?”

He nods.

“That was one of them. But it was different then. The light in there was green. It felt different when I carried it.”

“Different how?”

“It wasn’t anything... dark; just the opposite, actually- it was light. And it promised hope. And I used it to find Luke.”

“Skywalker?”

You nod. “Turns out, he changed it so my dad could find him down the line- but when my dad disappeared, he changed it so I could use it.”

“That’s a real convoluted way of leaving an emergency contact,” he quips, relieving some of the tension in the room.

“Wasn’t my idea,” you defend, putting your hands up.

“Fair point…” he affirms with a soft smile. “So why’d it change?”

“Well, Luke smashed it the second I showed it to him.”

Poe laughs, “right.”

You can’t tell if he was being sarcastic, but you’d rather not try to clarify. Instead, you continue. “But I wanted it back. It was still something my parents gave me, and I thought maybe it was worth a shot.”

“So, what, you built a new one?”

“No, no, I, uh…” You pause, realizing this is going to sound ridiculous. “I reached out to the force, and it… fixed it.”

Poe stares blankly.

Desperate to move things along so as to not waste anymore time, you give up on trying to explain it. “It would make more sense if I could show you.”

“Sure,” he says hesitantly, clearly not buying your story, but not in complete disbelief either.

“May I?” you ask softly, lifting your hand to his temple.

He shoots you a confused look, but when your expression remains completely serious, he finally nods.

You place your hand on the side of his head and call out to the force. Please. Let me show him. Show him what you showed me... Show him the wayfinder.

Your memories flash through the front of your mind- holding the wayfinder, hiding it, using it to find Luke, watching it shatter, reaching into the dark side to retrieve it, seeing Exegol, hiding it from Poe, hearing of it on the resistance base, and handing it to Poe. You drop your hand in your lap, watching Poe’s expression shift from confusion to resolution.

“I’ll be damned,” he murmurs. “You’re a special one, Kenobi.” He stands.

“So you’ll get it to Rey?”

“I will.”

“Do you think General Organa will be okay with it?”

“I think she’ll be relieved to know it’s almost over.”

You nod, taking a deep breath in relief. It’s almost over, you repeat to yourself.

“What’ll you do?”

You stand. “You’ll need time to get everyone ready and get over to Exegol, right?”

He nods.

“I’m gonna buy you some time.”

His face falls as he mutters your name in disbelief, his head tilting slightly to one side.

“I’ll make sure the Order isn’t on your backs. And if they are, like I said: I’ll buy you some time. I’m kind of a big deal over there,” you joke half-heartedly.

He shakes his head. “Are you sure?” he asks, concern saturating his tone. He knows better than to try to stop you- not because you couldn’t be convinced otherwise, but because he knows damn well he’d try to pull the same card if he were in your shoes. That was something the two of you undeniably had in common- the guts it takes to come up with big plans, and the iron will to try no matter how risky.

“I’m sure,” you answer with a deep breath, “it’s the least I can do.”

He nods, reaching out to shake your hand. You oblige, before he immediately pulls you into a proper hug. “Just come back to us, okay?” he whispers.

“Only if you promise to come back too.” You pull away just enough to look him in the eyes.

Poe lets out a breathy laugh. “You’ve got a deal.”

With one final squeeze, you both let go.

Poe heads straight to his ship and you watch him take off.

You’re about to jump into your own ship when you pause for a moment. Though you made a promise, you both knew it wasn’t one you were certain you could keep. You decide that, just in case you don’t make it back to your new home- to your family- you want to get one last look at the place you grew up in. Just a few minutes can’t hurt.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

He’s tearing through space in his TIE Whisper, combing through the galaxy using the force- though it isn’t helping as much as he had hoped. He feels like he’s holding his hands straight out in front of him, reaching into darkness, feeling around blind, hoping that eventually his fingers will graze your shoulder just long enough for him to understand how he can reach you. She’s close. I can feel it.

He glances at the navigator and sees a familiar planet marked on the map. He looks up, almost as if to confirm that this map isn’t lying to him too. Coruscant is right there. He thinks back to the tablet- to the tracker installed in his ship that you managed to remove. He’s hesitant. Would she really have come here? Where I could so easily find her? Is she leading me away from something else? He debates diverting his path, feeling stuck between going after his latest lead and going after you. If she is my way forward, he reasons, then I can have both.

Arriving at Coruscant, he sees a ship parked away from your home and lands next to it. It felt odd to be back at this place- it’s been a while since he last visited.

With your first trip home, he used the tracker in your ship to pinpoint where your house was. In between your visits home, he would stop by to search through your house, ensuring his own security. Unfortunately, on one such visit, he ran into a woman dressed as a stormtrooper stocking up some food in your cupboards, her face red and stained with tears. Even worse, he recognized her; she tried to replace him years ago. He knew it would only be a matter of time before she turned you away from him, used you against him, or managed to do both. He was quick to dispose of her.

He leaves his helmet in his ship and walks up to the doorway, in which the door was wide open. For a moment, he worries that this is a trap, but the thought vanishes the moment he sees you. You’re alone, humming to yourself as you stand in the center of the main area, looking around the space. Again, he speaks your name into the silence.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

You jump at the sound of a familiar voice calling to you, whipping around to see Kylo standing in the door.

“I was worried I’d never find you again,” he professes breathily as he rushes towards you, raising his arms to embrace you.

You step back, uncertain of what to say.

He stops while his brows stitch together upward in a pained expression of confusion, arms slowly returning to his sides.

“I don’t need you anymore,” you assert, finally finding your words. “I found someone to restore my memory. I just wanna be home now.”

“But you promised…” he trails off.

Your heart breaks as you watch his face. He looks exhausted. Desperate. Lost. You think of the resistance and the friends counting on you as they prepare for their hardest fight yet. You think of what Luke had said to you when you first met: ‘You can guide him back.’

“I can’t do this without you,” he adds, his voice hovering just above a whisper.

Taking a deep breath, you nod. “Okay… But I won’t go back to the Finalizer-”

“You won’t have to,” he interjects, “I know where to go. Just come with me. Please.” He offers his hand to you.

You take it, your motions stuttering for a moment as a wave of déjà vu hits you- you’ve seen this before too. Maybe this is how the force reassures me that this is the right way, you wonder, by reminding me of those visions.

As your hands join, you both pause to take in the moment before moving on. Kylo leads you out of your house and onto his personal ship. He plugs in a new set of coordinates and takes off.

You’re both silent on the way over. Kylo is focused on piloting the ship, eager to get wherever it is you’re going as fast as possible. Meanwhile, you’re thinking about everything that suddenly seems to be happening at once, worried that you’re bound to let someone down. Before you can worry about it any longer, you seem to arrive at the destination as Kylo lands his ship.

He steps out and offers his hand to help you step down onto the slippery surface of the wreckage, surrounded by raging sea. The roaring waves seem to you like a physical manifestation of the dark chaos that surrounds this place. In your mental periphery, whispers tease as your thoughts. You brush them off, focusing on your footsteps. One step at a time. Keep moving forward.

Kylo guides you through the wreckage of the destroyed spacecraft, eventually making it to the room in which the wayfinder was kept. Your heart stops as you watch him pick up a pyramid made of stone and green glass. There’s another one? As he picks up the guiding device, admiring it, your heart continues to sink as you realize: not only is our deal over, but now the resistance is in danger.

He turns to you.

“Is that the wayfinder?” you ask, hoping he’ll buy into your clueless act. Think, you plead with yourself.

He nods.

“So… what did you need me for?”

“We can move forward now- together,” he begins, closing the gap between the two of you.

You pause for a moment, trying to think of something to say, desperate for a course of action. I can’t convince him to stop. But I can’t let him have that wayfinder. Suddenly, it dawns on you.

You hold your hand out in front of you. “Can I hold it?” you ask, softening your tone as best as you can.

“You won’t be able to use it. You don’t even understand-”

“I know, but… The Force gives me visions. Sometimes it shows me the past, sometimes it guides me towards the future.” You place a hand on his shoulder. “I want to understand,” you whisper.

He nods, gently placing the object in your hands.

You take a couple of steps back as you stare down at it. Visions of Exegol flood your mind again- but this time, darkness grows as lightning erupts from below the surface up into the sky above. Your eyes widen. No, focus, you reprimand yourself. You look up at Kylo. Without another word, you think of Luke and smile.

“What do you see?” He asks as his face begins to light up.

With as much strength as you can muster, you catapult the wayfinder through the massive broken window on your left.

Kylo’s gaze follows the object as it flies into the violent waves outside. In an instant, curious eyes flip to rage. He draws his saber.

Without a moment of hesitation, you draw both of your own sabers.

“First, I killed your father,” he growls, his volume rising as he walks around you in a circle, “then, I killed your friend-”

Vilya, you realize in horror, no!

“Don’t make me kill you too,” he yells, his threat echoing against the metallic walls surrounding you.

With a yell, you charge at him, lifting both sabers and bringing them down towards his head.

A clash rings out as his saber crashes into your own, blocking your attack. Kylo pushes up and to the right, forcing your blades off of his own and bringing them downward.

As he attempts to swipe at your legs, you jump and twist around to swing towards his arm.

He spins out of your blade’s path as you land and jumps off the mass of shrapnel behind him, pushing his blade straight down towards your shoulder.

You roll out of the way and jump up as Kylo swings at you again, meeting his blade with one of yours. You aim your other saber at his side, but he swings down to catch it with is.

With an angry yell he begins to swing wildly, moving towards you. You start to walk backwards to maintain distance, catching his blade with one of yours at the end of every swing.

Making your way out of the room, you manage to find an opening and graze his side as you spin your saber around his arm.

He retracts for just a moment- just long enough for you to turn and run.

He chases you outside of the decaying construct, catching the back of your thigh with the tip of his saber.

With a cry, you reflexively spin around with your blades pointed towards him. Your foot nearly slips on the soaked metal you stand on, but you manage to catch yourself and use it to slide over to dodge another attack.

Kylo continues to push you backward as he swings at you with increasing speed and ferocity, his anger guiding his every move. He lifts his saber over his head and forces it downward, meeting both of your sabers crossed over one another in a screaming clash.

You struggle to keep the red saber away as he pushes down, forcing you onto your knees.

“After everything I did for you,” he spats through gritted teeth, “you destroyed our future.”

Just as your arms are about to give out, the pressure suddenly lifts and Kylo stares out blankly.

He hears his mother’s voice calling out to him. ‘Ben,’ she whispers.

In an instant, you realize this is your only chance to get out alive. I promised. You spin back up to your feet and bring your blade down on Kylo’s thigh.

He feels that she’s fading, and a searing pain in his leg tears him away from her, and then she’s gone. He drops to his knees with a cry.

Before he can retaliate at all, you’re sprinting towards his ship. He stands to chase after you, but as he turns, he sees his father, Han Solo, standing in the way. Another wave crashes over him. The water comes down, and with it, Han Solo is gone.

And you are flying away.

I can still buy them time.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

When Kylo finally gets back to the Finalizer, you are the only thing on his mind. Finding you has never been more crucial to his life’s work.

However, the moment he arrives, he’s called to the throne room. His search will have to wait- just for a while. Soon.

Walking in, he kneels before Snoke, who briefly delivers the news.

Time suddenly moves differently as the words ring in his mind. ‘She’s been sent for execution. She is useless to us now- and only a distraction to you. A weakness to be eliminated.’

Unbridled fury blinds him and commands his body to move. Though his mind is far from him, his body is swift in its delivery of judgement. It all seems to move past him in a blur. She’s dead, he hears, over and over and over in his mind, screaming louder and louder. She’s dead. My future is gone before I could even reach her. She’s dead.

When his body finally stops, his chest heaving in labored breath, he looks around him to see bodies scattered across the floor. Snoke’s legs still sit in his throne, but his torso lies on the ground beside it. The blood of the praetorian guards riddles their already-red suits with dark crimson splotches.

He’s killed his way through everyone that attempted to confuse him- to turn him from his destiny- and yet he’s never felt so lost.

But before he has another moment to think, someone else reaches out to him.

‘Kylo Ren,’ a familiar voice called out in his mind, ‘You are losing your way- straying from the legacy of your grandfather. Join me. Allow me to guide you again.’

“Okay,” Kylo whispers to himself. He finally tears his eyes away from the slaughter he’s surrounded himself with and heads to his ship, on which a map through the Unknown Regions has been transmitted. Ignoring the unfolding chaos around him, he takes off from the Finalizer’s hangar, headed for Exegol.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

As the troopers drag you away for execution, adrenaline slows time down to a crawl. You think about everything that has seemed to go wrong since you made it to Chandrila, and how every decision- whether for better or worse- has brought you here. You think about your father, the man you never got to meet again who died just the same way you’re about to. It’s almost poetic. Almost.

You think about the people you care about. Vilya, who sacrificed her livelihood and her life for you. Poe, whose promise you’d be breaking. Kylo, who may never make it back to the light. Finn and Rey, who trained with you and welcomed you into the family you never had. Luke, who became like a father to you. Obi-Wan, the man who believed in you despite the odds, and would now have to be let down.

Be with me, Grandfather, you think as the troopers bring you to your knees, the laser ax humming near your ear.

‘Bring balance back to the force,’ his voice replied urgently, ‘balance, padawan.’

You hear the whispers of the dark side teasing your mind again, and this time, you take its hand. In one swift movement, you wrench from their grasp, turn around, and lift both troopers off the ground in a chokehold with the force. The moment they fall unconscious, you dash to the hangar, taking the lesser-known hallways and shortcuts you've grown acquainted with to get there as fast as you can undetected. When you arrive, you run to the closest ship and hop in, taking off the moment the ship starts running. Though some troopers notice your sudden departure via an unauthorized ship, their blasts are powerless against your escape.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Arriving back to the resistance base, you’re surrounded by chaos. Countless ships are beginning to take off, while many others are speeding around to gather their supplies and say just-in-case goodbyes and well wishes. Looking for any familiar face, you find Finn handing off gear to some pilots.

“Finn!” You call out over the noise of the crowd, weaving through the bodies to reach him.

His head perks up at his name, and upon your arrival, he greets you.

“Have the others left yet?”

“Rey is already there. I think Poe is on his way, but he’s still reaching out to our allies for help.”

You nod. “What about General Organa?” you ask, realizing the normally hands-on general is nowhere to be seen.

Finn's face falls. He glances to the pilots, who wear a similar expression, and they take the rest of the gear before promptly heading off to their respective ships.

“She’s gone,” he says finally.

Your heart sinks. I didn’t know…

“But we carry on,” he adds. “In her honor, and in the name of everyone we've lost along the way.” Finn puts his hands on your shoulders. “We could use your help.”

“I’m no pilot-”

“No,” he interjects, shaking his head, “Help Rey.”

“I don’t know if I can-”

“You have to try,” he pleads.

His look of desperation takes you back.

“Someone has to try,” he reiterates. “I’ve seen you train. You’re the only one of us who can keep up with her, and I’m worried she can’t do it alone.”

“Okay,” you nod, “I’ll try.”

He pulls you in for a hug, whispering a ‘thank you’ beside your ear.

“I’ll see you later then,” you suppose.

“See you there,” he confirms as he takes off towards the base.

You get back into the ship you had taken from the Finalizer to find that Finn sent you the map they had retrieved from the wayfinder. With a deep breath and a prayer to the force, you take off to Exegol.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Rey steps off of her ship and onto the ground of Exegol with Leia’s lightsaber in hand. Before her stands- no, floats- what must be an old Sith temple just above the planet’s surface. She looks up at the massive black structure as lightning strikes the ground nearby at random. She moves forward, eventually finding a platform that begins to lower her underground.

She watches the statues surrounding her grow in height as the platform falls lower and lower until it finally stops. She steps off and follows the guidance of the force as it leads her into the amphitheater that holds Darth Sidious, held by the Ommin Harness, and his throne. She slowly walks up to Sidious, who greets his granddaughter with an all-too ominous sense of anticipation.

With words he knows will sting, Sidious taunts her, insisting that her legacy is here. Though a comment on her parents and a threat to her friends tempts her for a moment to give in, the force pulls her back as she realizes: I’m not alone.

You’ve arrived- she can feel it. And you’re just in time.

She steps away, the hum of her drawn saber echoing in the massive room.

Sidious senses a shift and pulls back. At the same time, the Sovereign Protectors make their way out of the shadows.

Rey brings her blade up with a smile.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Kylo lands beside an old X-Wing fighter when he arrives to the stormy planet. The dark side is potent here, meaning that the light stands out all the more- and Rey is a crimson stain on a blanket of snow. He doesn’t need to see her to know that she’s already here. In his mind, though, it’s just one more person from a long line of people that must be eliminated.

“All these lives, just for control?” The voice of Han Solo beckons from behind, stopping Kylo in his tracks.

Kylo keeps his back to the ghost of his father. “They’re sacrifices for the greater good. Control can put an end to the suffering.”

“The suffering will never end, son. It’s life. And no matter how hard you try, you’ll always find more like me- people who want to really live.”

“I killed you!” Kylo bellows, fists clenching at his side. “What makes them any different?”

“Did you?” Han asks, taking steps towards his son.

Kylo stops. For once, he’s wordless.

“No matter how hard we try to run, we always end up back home. The sooner you accept that, the easier your life is gonna be, kid.”

“I have no home,” he laments, turning his head back just over his shoulder.

Then, Leia speaks: “Oh, that’s a terrible excuse.”

Finally, Kylo turns around to see his father and mother standing side by side, looking at him with nothing but compassion in their eyes.

“Pave a new path, Ben,” Leia beckons.

He takes a few long moments to think.

“There’s so many choices,” he finally whispers.

“It never matters how many options there are,” she reassures him, “you’ll know which one is right.”

“But even the right path seems so dark now.”

“The light will find you,” Leia encourages.

“It always does,” Han adds.

His parents fade, and he turns to stare out to the horizon. With a grunt, he throws his saber. As it arcs in the air, a bolt of lightning strikes down, running through the lightsaber and reaching the ground. The hilt cracks as it falls to the dead earth, the kyber crystal inside shattered into pieces.

No more.

“Ben?”

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

When you arrive to Exegol, you take comfort in the feeling of having been here before; it gives you more confidence in your ability to help Rey. Landing near the massive black box that seems to float on the planet’s surface, you notice two other ships are already there. You take your place in line with them and step out of your ship.

Your eyes are immediately drawn to the man you had been running from for so long now. He stands at a distance, his body half-facing you, and yet he seems to be staring off into nothing, taking no notice of your arrival. You watch as he throws his lightsaber into the horizon, a lightning bolt catching it as it flies.

You hesitantly walk towards him, but as you approach, you realize something is off. The man before you is not at all the man you had come to know, and at the same time, he has never seemed to be more himself. Suddenly, you’re reminded of one of the first times you had seen into his mind, all those months ago: the visions of his mother longing for him to come home- the sound of her calling his name. As you look to the man before you, only one name comes to mind; so, in a shaky voice, you call to him:

“Ben?”

He turns to you. The light. His mind takes a moment to process the sight in front of him. He runs to you. Before you can embrace, he stops just short. But what if she’s only a ghost, too; here to haunt me for my failure?

You sense his hesitation, his fear, and his aching heart. You take his hand in both of yours. “It’s me,” you affirm softly.

His shoulders relax as he lets out a shaky, thankful breath. She’s alive. Despite his moment of blissful victory, he is still left unsure of what to do or say next.

Something tells you he didn’t come here to help. Yet, you know now that he can. Together, you think.

“I have to do this,” you finally say, your voice carrying a greater confidence than you were used to.

“I know,” he says softly.

“And you do too.”

He nods. “Together.”

You remove your sabers from your belt and hold them out in front of you. Your eyes linger on the saber in your left hand- Anakin’s saber. The one Kylo unknowingly brought you to in Tatooine. The one Luke gifted to you and trained you with. The one that could bring balance to the force when carried with the other. Looking back up at Ben, you hand him his grandfather’s lightsaber.

You both draw your grandfathers’ blades as the Knights of Ren suddenly surround you. Clashing blades and strained yells and thuds of bodies ring out in a cacophony accompanied by the sound of thunder as you fight. As blades once turned against each other return back to weapons meant to work together, you both feel the spirits of Obi-Wan and Anakin guide your minds and your blades to act as one. Though fighting well, the Knights of Ren could not stop the power set in motion by the two of you.

It's as if the force is using you both to heal a wound neither caused.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Luke was first caught off guard by the smell of smoke, as if a giant bonfire had been started somewhere nearby. It wasn’t until he saw the source of the smoke that he began to panic.

Running towards the old tree, he’s horrified to see flames engulfing the trunk. As he begins to hopelessly attempt to put out the flames, he realizes Yoda has been standing there all along in his ghostly form.

“Help me!” Luke cries out in desperation.

“No need, there is. Start the fire, I did.”

Luke stops as Yoda’s words sink in. “You did what?”

“Time, it is. Pave a new path, we must. One of balance. Set in motion, you must,” Yoda explains.

“But we could still use those!”

“Create something new, you cannot, if, cling to the old, you will.”

Though a little reluctant to admit it, Luke sees the truth of Yoda’s words, even if he disagreed with the drastic actions taken to underline them. It was time to let go of the idea that there could only be one or the other- light or dark. He could still leave a legacy, but it could be a better one; it could be dedicated to accepting the balance already within the force.

“So how do we start?”

“Your nephew- needs you, he does. To Exegol, you must go. Made right, wrongs will be.”

Luke wonders if perhaps the force will make a way for him, so he could still help guide his nephew; perhaps he didn’t fail Ben completely. Maybe he could help his latest padawans, too. But there’s only one way to know.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

You and Ben manage to finish off the Knights of Ren and make it down to the throne room of the Sith Citadel by the time Rey defeats the last of the Sovereign Protectors.

As Rey steadies herself again, the three of you line up and ready your blades. For a moment, with the each of you giving it your all, it seems you just manage to counter every move Sidious can throw at you. We have a chance of winning this. However, after only a few moments of vicious back-and-forth attacks, Sidious forces the three of you backward.

Holding Rey and Ben back with the lightning that streaks from his hand, Sidious force chokes you, lifting you up and towards him. “Give into your pain,” he growls at you.

He then turns to Ben. “Your anger made you stronger,” he taunts. He throws you off to the side, your back slamming into the stone wall surrounding you.

Using the force, he holds you there, a few meters off the ground. “And you cannot save them all,” he cackles to Rey as the ceiling of the Citadel splits open.

Hanging above you are hundreds and hundreds of ships flying amidst a massive Sith fleet. Canon blasts riddle the sky as the ships all fire at each other. Suddenly, a gigantic bolt of lightning arcs up into the sky, splitting into hundreds of small branches, each attaching to a resistance ship.

As the lightning shoots upward, Sidious slams you to the ground.

You hear both Rey and Ben yell as you hit the ground with a thud and blackout.

When you come back to consciousness, you look up to see Luke standing a few yards away from Sidious. Casting out from his hands is a cluster of lightning, aimed directly for Luke.

Luke’s eyes are set on Sidious, his determination made clear in his expression. On the other side of the bolts of lightning are Luke’s hands, catching the lightning and pushing it backward.

Sidious laughs as Luke begins to slide backwards due to the force of the attack he’s holding back.

Blueish spheres of energy begin to build in front of Luke’s palms as he finally holds his ground and begins to take steps towards Sidious.

Sidious’ expression shifts to concern as Luke overtakes the power used against him and harnesses it.

With a shout, Luke pushes the energy he had channeled back to Sidious, and suddenly the lightning bolt branching out in the air above disappears as Sidious is forced backwards. Cracking and crashing sounds ring out as the harness holding Sidious up and keeping him alive breaks down, some pieces falling to the ground.

Luke flies backwards from the resulting explosion, landing hundreds of feet away from the fight.

Ben jumps up with his saber, set to fly down on Sidious and split him in half, but he’s stopped just inches before his blade can touch the Sith. His saber falls to the ground as he’s held in the air.

You finally manage to get to your feet and run to Luke, but before you can make it even halfway to him, you’re suddenly being dragged backwards towards Sidious.

In just a few moments, You and Ben have been forced to your knees side by side. You watch helplessly as beams of whispering, swirling light are drawn out for your chest and his. You feel the force cry out as you become increasingly weaker. Your body fights to get into overdrive as death draws near, but to no avail.

A sick laughter echoes in the chamber as Sidious watches his decomposing body come back to life, sapping the power of a dyad.

Suddenly, the pressure holding you and Ben up relieves and you both drop.

Rey stands between you, two sabers clutched in her hands.

Another arc of lightning crackles over your head, which Rey catches and pushes back with Obi-Wan’s saber.

“I,” Sidious bellows, his voice ringing out in the room and in your minds as you struggle to stay awake, “am all the Sith.”

Rey begins to push forward. As she passes you, you can hear the voices of countless people whispering. This time, the whispers aren’t dark, hissing threats. Instead, light seems to glow around her as the whispers make her stronger.

“And I,” she answers through gritted teeth, drawing Anakin’s saber and crossing the blade over Obi-Wan’s, “am all the Jedi.”

She reaches the steps of Sidious’ decayed throne and forces the lightning back onto him.

His flesh begins to rip and tear away from his bones. He cries out in agony as his power, his throne, and his life are finally ripped away from him for the last time until there is nothing left.

The moment he’s gone, you glance up at the skies to see the Sith ships explode as the resistance ships- now recovered and revitalized with hope- destroy everything that’s left.

You smile weakly, looking back to Ben to make note of the victory, but he’s no longer there.

He sits beside Rey, who lies limp on the ground.

You manage to crawl over to her.

“Do something,” he pleads to you.

I’m the healer. I should be able to do something. You look down and gingerly take Rey’s body from Ben’s hands. As you hold her, though, you sense that she is too far gone for any tincture or medicine.

“Give her to me,” Luke instructs softly as he kneels down next to you.

You look up at him hesitantly as you shift Rey from your lap into his.

“It’s time we bring an end to the Jedi, too,” he begins, looking between you and Ben as he holds Rey, one hand cradling her head while one rests on her stomach. “One extreme will always foster the growth of the other. Forge a new way.”

You nod, and though you don’t understand why, something churns in your stomach telling you that this is goodbye.

Ben nods, and it seems he understands more than you do. “Thank you,” he whispers, his eyes sparkling as they well up. A tear gently rolls down his cheek in silence.

With a soft smile, Luke closes his eyes and calls out to the force one last time. He takes a deep breath.

Rey’s breathing grows stronger as color comes back to her body. She looks over to you, then to Ben, then to Luke.

You smile at the sight of Rey sitting up, her strength renewed.

She turns to Luke to thank him, but before the words make it out, Luke disappears.

You blink a few times as you look down to see his robes left behind in his place.

Rey turns back to you both with a grin, sharing a knowing look.

Though he’s gone, you realize you can still sense his presence, and you finally understand.

Without wasting another moment, you pull Rey and Ben into an embrace. You all let out a breathy, almost incredulous laugh. We did it. We won.

You all help each other onto your feet and stand. Rey gathers the robes of her mentor and calls the stray sabers to her hands. You and Ben take your sabers back from Rey and look up to the skies.

Though the ships are no longer firing, and most are still, you can almost hear their cheers from down here. One by one, the resistance and their allies begin to take off, heading back to wherever they came from.

The three of you silently return to your ships. Rey gets into hers first.

“I’ll meet you there,” you promise.

She nods, thanking the both of you one last time, and takes off to return to the resistance base.

You watch her leave before looking back down at Ben, who can’t seem to take his eyes off of you.

He closes the gap between you and wraps his arms around you in a strong embrace.

You return the affection without a moment of hesitation.

While you’re holding each other, it feels as if something has finally finished; as if a chapter is closed- one that you both-and the force itself- were waiting for all along.

You let go just enough to see Ben’s face and, with as much courage as you have left, kiss him.

When you finally pull away from each other, you both wear a bright smile.

“I need to return to my friends,” you finally say.

“Go,” he encourages, walking backwards to his ship.

“Where will I find you?”

“I’ll be home.”

You laugh as you watch him take off. You know he means your home, in Coruscant- but, you do like the idea of sharing it with him.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Arriving back to the resistance base, you struggle to find a place to land among the scattered ships that were hastily parked and the masses of people celebrating the final victory. Eventually, you do find a place to comfortably park your ship.

Although you’re exhausted from the insane day you had just endured, you’re also antsy to see your friends again. You wander through the clusters of people, scanning for anyone you recognize. You realize trying to ask anyone for direction would be hopeless- not just because they would have no real answer, but also because they’re caught up in their own moments. Finally, your eyes land on Rey and Finn, locked in a tight embrace.

You jog over to them and see a weary looking Poe approaching the couple. You run straight to him, nearly toppling him over in a hug. He lets out an easy laugh.

“Thank you,” you whisper.

“For what?”

“For keeping your promise.”

“Only because you kept yours,” he answers, relief clear in his voice.

You lightly peck his cheek and pull away.

He gives you a wink before Finn barges in and hugs Poe, the two of them laughing. You turn to Rey and the two of you embrace again, your laughter joining the cacophony of jubilation that surrounds you all.

It’s over. You all won. And you can change the future for the better.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

After some retellings of the battles you each fought and making plans to meet up again to discuss the journey that now lies before you all, you decide it’s time to head back home. You start making your way back to your ship to see Luke leaning against it, grinning as he waves at you. Beside him is Obi-Wan, arms crossed, watching with a smile. The two of them, though appearing to you clear as day, seem to be somewhat translucent. You stop in your tracks.

“Thank you,” you whisper to them, “for everything.”

With a wink from one and a nod from the other, they fade away.

You get back to your ship and arrive at Coruscant to see Ben standing outside, leaning against the doorway of your home as he watches the sunset. When you reach him, he lifts and spins you in another hug, setting you back down with a kiss. There is so much to say, but for now, it will have to wait.

The two of you head inside to celebrate, rest, and dream about the future you will create together.

(Epilogue)

28 notes · View notes

afternoondreaming · 28 days

Text

No Business Like Show Business (2/?)

Back at it again with the white Vans! (Does- Does anyone remember that? Am I getting too old?) Aaaanyways, we’re slowly gettin’ into it now! It began to get a bit too long, so Mr. Funny will just have to explain his shenanigans next time. Also, just letting ya’ll know, this is probably gonna be canon divergent. And I swear it’s gonna get funnier dw. You’re just a bit of a stick-in-the-mud right now.

The taxi you had hailed all the way out here skidded its tires slightly as it sped off. It had been a surprisingly long drive over to Puzzlevision— and an odd one, at that. You lived far away, and so as not to get sick, you avoided using your cell on the drive. It gave you ample time to watch the scenery, which seemed to gradually change the closer you got. Almost imperceptibly everything around you got more… Saturated. Colors showing brighter, eventually becoming almost painful to the eyes. It was reminiscent of color correction for TV, but why in the world would that be a natural effect?

You were aware that the world contained- for lack of a better phrase- an interesting cast of characters. Creatures of all shapes and sizes roaming about. You, however, lived in a painfully average area. Typical sights, typical people, and typical suburban antics. So far removed from the more fanatical aspects of life. Sure, you’d seen the occasional toad around town, but that was as exotic as it got. If even the nature around here was exceptionally strange, what would the people be like…?

That was another strange aspect you were noticing as you stood with your portfolio in the parking lot. There were no cars. No bikes. No sign of any human being inhabiting the studio that stood before you. Even the painted parking lines were noticeably faded, asphalt cracking and heaving from lack of care. You had the right address, you knew that. And you were certainly well within business hours. So where was everyone? With hesitant steps you began to walk to the entrance, fiddling with your portfolio and outfit with much more than pre-interview jitters. At the very least, you had told Tori where you were going, and your phone location was on. If you truly needed it, you could get someone to help you… Hopefully.

You let out a calming exhale before opening the door. Which quickly backfired, as the motion kicked up a huge cloud of dust. Sputtering out coughs you waved your hand in front of you to try to clear the air. Was this truly an abandoned building? As you got a better look, you became more assured of that thought. All of the furniture was dated and caked in a thick layer of dust. Though, you did notice a pair of footprints on the floor. Marking what must have been a frequently trodden path. What had you gotten yourself into? You turned heel, beginning to walk out so you could call a cab home. Suddenly your movement was halted by a heavy hand coming down on your shoulder. You couldn’t help the sound of surprise that escaped your mouth, jumping slightly and turning to see whomever it was. Slowly your gaze went up, up, up… Oh God. This man was towering! You liked to consider yourself of average height, and even then, your gaze would meet his midsection if you didn’t crane your neck.

A TV’s glow was what met your gaze, a neutral expression displayed upon it. So… He really was a television. Seeing him in interviews a couple of times, you weren’t exactly shocked. But… It was still slightly jarring in person. Everything about him but his color testing bars were in grayscale, like he stepped out of the classic silver screen. Rather fitting, you supposed. “Uh, hello? Puzzlevision to interviewee? I asked you a question.” The man ‘spoke’, if you could call it that, picture flipping to something akin to confusion.

You quickly corrected your agape expression, straightening your posture. “Oh goodness, I’m sorry. I guess I was a bit star struck…!” You laughed awkwardly, trying not to be stiff as a board. He removed his hand from your shoulder, striking a confident pose. He moved… oddly. It wasn’t fluid, but certainly exaggerated.

“Aha! Of course you were!” He looked awfully pleased with himself, yet surprised at the same time. “Your call for employment was answered by the one and only: Mr. Puzzles!” The titular Mr. Puzzles held the pose for a moment longer before returning to a neutral stance and face.

“Uh, yeah…” Mumbling, you reached out your hand for a handshake. Looks like flattery would get you pretty far here. If you didn’t hold yourself to higher standards, perhaps you’d use that to your advantage. “Still, my apologies. Lemme introduce myself, I’m-“

“Yes, yes, I know who you are, my rising star!” He interrupted you, turning around without shaking your extended hand as he began to walk. Apparently, he just expected you to follow. “I sent you a response, after all!”

“Wait-“ You started, beginning to speed walk in order to keep up with the long legged man. “I’m not a new actor…! I got a letter for the screenwriter position!” Was he getting a whole new staff?

“Again- I’ll repeat myself- I know.” Mr. Puzzles responded, his voice crackling with a flamboyant sarcasm. “I only hired a screenwriter- no actors. I just find your name lacking a certain… star power, is all!” …Had he just played a laugh track for his own joke? You found yourself frowning behind his back as you followed him. “It's terribly drab, my friend!” The man opened the door to another dusty room, gesturing for you to step inside just as you made yourself look less annoyed. “For someone like yourself? You need a title worthy of someone working at Puzzlevision~! You’ve headed multiple successful projects, but never having done so on your own. Someone with talent, but not successful enough to avoid being poached!” This was beginning to feel more insulting by the second. “Therefore! A rising star, an up-and-coming powerhouse, a starlet!”

“Now, wait a moment.” Hesitantly you spoke up as you began to sit down on the terribly dusty chair. There goes the dry cleaning fee you paid. “You’re right. I have headed multiple successful projects. But, screenwriters don’t work alone. I would’ve never done that because that’s not how it works.”

“Well, you’ll have to start now, because that’s how it works at Puzzlevision!” Mr. Puzzles sat across from you, unbothered by dust or grime as he crossed a leg and leaned one elbow on the table. “Besides having my expert guidance and leadership, Starlet, you’ll be working entirely by yourself!”

…Huh?

#fanfic #x reader #mr puzzles #smg4 mr puzzles #smg4 fanfic #self insert fanfic #self insert #canon divergence #mr puzzles x reader #smg4 puzzlevision #self ship #self ship fanfiction

18 notes · View notes

princess-hope-selfships · 1 month

Text

✨Chapter Three: Complicated Review ✨

Summary: Being a good manager of the hotel, Alastor gives Dazzler her performance review. However, Alastor is... struggling with some complicated feelings. He tries his best to maintain a professional attitude, despite his troubles.

Word Count: 3944

Tags: self insert x canon, oc x canon, yet another Alastor selfshipper, aroace self insert, (Farquaad point meme) the gray aro has fallen in love with the other gray aro! mutual pining, Alastor in denial, the hotel actually being run like a business lmao

A/N: okay this chapter has the romantic first hand touch cliche, don't make fun of me it's ony of my fave tropes ok 😭😭😭 I've been super shy about sharing this chapter but I'm finally posting it FFFF-

taglist: @goldenworldsabound @cj-furry-shipper if you wanna be added to my fic taglist just let me know 💖 Divider from @.cafekitsune

Alastor definitely had some sort of feeling about Dazzler, which he could not identify.

Well. He could guess. Based on context. Based on those rare feelings he’d only felt for one or two people before.

But he didn’t want to give it acknowledgement. After much deliberation, he decided to refer to the feeling as ‘distracted’ over anything else. Dazzler ‘distracted’ him.

She was nothing special, so he didn’t know why.

It definitely did raise his brow to find out that she was an employee of that television-headed idiot, while simultaneously being employed here at the hotel. For a good amount of time he was certain it must have been another one of Vox’s half-brained attempts to keep an eye on him, like when he had sent Sir Pentious to the hotel.

But Alastor did his investigating, making sure to “just happen” to show up in the room Dazzler was in, making sure to cross paths with her more than a few times, and making sure to talk with her at length during at least a few of those encounters.

And she never seemed to do anything worthy of suspicion. If anything she seemed to hate Vox, so much that she would tell Angel Dust or Niffty or Husk about it. Sometimes Charlie, who would laugh awkwardly and tell her that her words weren’t very nice.

If anything, and he hated to admit it, Dazzler was actually a delight to talk to.

A pleasant mix of witty and shy, an odd contrast, he thought, considering her other occupation of showing off her body for money on VoxTube, or whatever that godforsaken video service was called.

Dazzler was pleasant on the eyes, with curly pink locks and bright eyes, and… admittedly, a shapely, plump body that he found quite… hm… appealing, he decided to call it.

She had a sharp tongue to her when she got bold. She would get playful with him, but still showed him respect. It was a nice change of pace, to be spoken to so casually, even though he was not used to it from common sinners.

Aesthetically, she was pretty, and platonically, she was compatible with him. That, however, was where he forced that line of thought to stop.

After so much surveillance, Alastor chalked up that Dazzler was just some frustrated entertainer that Vox had employed and then shoved aside in favor of someone else. She was only working here because she genuinely needed income from another source.

It made him a bit smug, thinking yet again he was about to demonstrate how much better than Vox he was. A better overlord, a better showman, and soon enough a better boss to his employees. He even thought about raising her wages, just to earn her favor. Maybe even make her consider quitting VoxTek.

Though, it gave him pause, to wonder why he wanted to earn that favoritism so much. Surely he didn’t want to prove he was better than Vox that badly.

That is another thing we will not be addressing, he thought to himself with an uncharacteristic frown, elbow upon the desk with the hand at his temple, fingers clawing through his hair. His eyes practically gazed through the notes he intended to review, but still had yet to properly read.

Knock knock knock.

No more time for that nonsense. Alastor’s body bolted upright, his lips instantly curling upward, flashing his teeth as he responded to the guest at his door.

“Yes, come on in!”

With a dainty step, Dazzler pushed open the door, peering into the office.

“Uh, hi!” She called with a nervous smile. Alastor took in the sight of her as she made apprehensive steps into the office. She had changed out of her work uniform before coming, apparently. Now she sported a dress, the bodice red, the sleeves resting past her shoulders, and a flared black skirt. It was a good look on her.

He quickly reminded himself that how she decided to dress outside of work and how she looked in those clothes didn’t matter to him.

“Well, darling, don’t be shy, come and take a seat.” Alastor gestured to the chair on the other side of his desk. “I don’t want to come off as an employer who’s too intimidating to approach!”

Dazzler took quick steps up to the seat now, clearly intimidated anyway.

“I thought that was your whole schtick,” she quipped. “Like uh, being too scary to everyone.”

“Well, that is true,” Alastor chuckled, picking up his papers and straightening them. “However, that’s for out there! Not here.”

“Hm…” Dazzler hummed, a little smile on her lips. She still seemed nervous. That was fine, Alastor thought. He preferred her nervous over something like obnoxious or pretentious. It was a bit surprising how shy she seemed actually, given her career of being… essentially a party girl who thrived on attention.

“Now, then, Dazzler…” Alastor reached up to adjust his monocle, eyeing his sparsely written notes. He had been too distracted to write much of anything while he thought of Dazzler. She was ‘distracting,’ after all. “Well, first of all, how are you enjoying the job, my dear?”

He glanced past his papers at her, to find her a bit surprised by the question. She fiddled with her skirt, tugging it down over her legs as she kicked them slightly. A nervous habit of hers, he’d found out from following her around.

“Oh, it’s fine! It’s not something I ever thought I’d go for, but I mean, I’m liking it so far!” Dazzler replied. Alastor’s smile and gaze at her never faltered. She continued, when Alastor said nothing. “I do really like my co-workers a lot, Niffty and Husk get along with me well, I think. And the guests are fun. Um…”

She took a moment, as if contemplating a difficult decision. She lifted her hands, pointing her index fingers towards him, with the thumbs upright, and tilted them up and down over and over. Some kind of gun motion?

“My bosses are pretty cool too, ya know? Huh? Yeah?” Dazzler flashed him a big grin, continuing the finger gun thing.

Eventually Alastor let out an amused snort, shaking his head slightly as his eyes fell back to his notes.

“Yes, I suppose I am rather ‘cool,’ eh? Charlie is a delight as well, of course.” Alastor let out a chuckle, before his grin grew wider, and a touch sinister. “I’m sure that I’m performing much better as a boss than the one at your other job, mm?”

Dazzler seemed taken aback by that statement, her hands lowering as she stared up at him, clearly trying to figure out what to say.

“Oh, um…”

“Never mind that,” Alastor was quick to say. But Dazzler was intent on responding.

“Yeah, Vox kinda sucks ass,” she said bluntly. Another snort came from Alastor, and he lifted his gaze to Dazzler.

“You and I may get along very well, my dear.” The smile on his face… could it get any wider? Dazzler started to laugh, clearly loosening up, finally. Her laugh was delightful, he thought.

“I guess that’s a good thing, since I’m probably gonna be working here for a while with how he treats me.” Dazzler leaned in, placing an elbow on Alastor’s desk. His eyes darted there for a moment, before lifting back to her face, where he saw her smiling at him with a hand on her cheek.

“Well, with the quality of work you’re doing, you’ll definitely be welcome here for that while!” Alastor let his papers lay flat on his desk again. “You’re performing very well, Dazzler. I know we’re not quite operating at a capacity that renders us even remotely busy, but even so, you’re doing great in finding work to be done anyway.”

Dazzler’s smile grew, and he saw her eyes light up at the praises he gave her.

“Oh,” she said softly, her gaze lowering a bit. “Thanks..! Yeah I… I’ve done this before, I’m pretty good at finding stuff to do. Oh, I mean, I haven’t done this down here, but…” She lifted a hand, gesturing vaguely. He assumed she meant down here in Hell.

“Is that so?”

“Yeah, I was a hotel housekeeper for my first job, as a teenager.” She leaned back in her seat, her hands going back to fumbling with her skirt. “And a front desk hotel clerk for my… last job. Before I… died.”

“Intriguing,” he replied, taking up a pen and taking a note about this to pass on to Charlie. Dazzler glanced nervously at his writing, suddenly reminded of the formality of this meeting. He could tell her nerves were creeping back in. Quick to bring the conversation back around, he continued with another question. “So then, how are you enjoying your time living here?”

Dazzler seemed surprised by this, too.

“Charlie wants me to get input from the employees,” Alastor explained. “Wants to make sure we’re providing adequate room and board. I’m quite convinced everything is top notch, really, but of course I’d like confirmation that I’m correct.”

“Oh, that makes sense…” Dazzler started to laugh again. “I’m just kinda like… who’s reviewing who here?”

“Well, I suppose as your employer I’m just curious as to whether we’re doing well.” He met her eyes, a more cheeky smile on his face as he lifted a brow. “Better than your other job, I assume.”

“You really don’t like Vox, huh?” Dazzler snickered.

“My dear, you have no idea.”

“Better than Vox.” Dazzler nodded, offering him a smirk now. She leaned in again, elbows on the desk, hands on her cheeks.

There was a change in her demeanor, her eyes now a half-lidded gaze with batting eyelashes, while the grin on her lips curled into a smug smirk. Her voice became soft, as if telling him a secret.

“I really hope it stays that way,” she uttered, “I’d love to find out how much better than Vox, you know?”

Alastor’s brow lifted. He could feel his heartbeat quicken, something he fought hard to reject.

His eyes darted down to her chest for a fraction of a second. She was clearly trying to accentuate her breasts, capturing them between her arms and squeezing.

Just as quickly he glanced up to her face again, hoping she hadn’t noticed, but knowing that she definitely did, the way she was staring at him. It was confirmed when he saw that smirk on her face get bigger.

His mind clouded briefly, forgetting to respond with more playful banter. Not just with merely the sight of her chest and the cleavage she was sporting, but perhaps even more so the fact that she was clearly trying to get him to look at it.

“I’ll do my best,” Alastor eventually said, lip twitching. They shared a beat of silence.

Dazzler took in a nervous breath and looked away sheepishly, quickly sitting herself upright with her hands firmly on her lap.

“Uh- the employee rooms are great,” she said quickly. “The accommodations are awesome, it’s nice that we pretty much have free reign over the kitchen and amenities.”

Alastor stole just a brief moment while her head was turned away to peer at her chest once again, uncertain what exactly he was thinking in wanting to do so.

His eyes slowly ran down along her arms, onto her hands, along her fingers. She kept talking, and he couldn’t help but watch her face as she spoke. His ear twitched slightly, flicking back for a moment before straightening up.

He blinked rapidly, realizing he had fallen into some sort of daze.

“It’s nice that you guys let me do my streams here, too,” she was saying when he came to. “Vox barely pays me now, ‘cause I’ve fallen behind so much, so the little tips and stuff I get on my streams really help.”

“Yes, yes, of course,” Alastor replied, a placeholder statement while he parsed what exactly it was that she said. Regaining composure, his smile grew wide again, though a bit strained. “Your little broadcasts are… not to my taste, but I would be remiss to deny an entertainer her tools of the trade.”

“Yeah, I know you’re not a huge fan,” Dazzler laughed. There was a blush across her cheeks that Alastor attempted to ignore. “But it’s fine, yeah, as long as I can keep doing my thing I’m really happy here.”

She reached up to start playing with her hair, pushing some of those pretty curly locks away from her face.

“It was so fuckin’ cool that Charlie had some guys move my stuff for me! My setup is still in top condition.”

Alastor started leaning in, not even really realizing he was doing so. Slowly he propped up his head with a hand under his chin, his smile becoming soft and tender as he listened to her.

Dazzler wrung her hands, her eyes casting downward. Out of nervousness? He couldn’t help but watch how her eyelashes fluttered as she continued.

“So yeah, I'm really grateful and happy here at the hotel. Both that you guys gave me a job and provided me a place to live.” She paused, before letting out a little laugh, quickly adding, “and yeah, way cooler and comfier than VoxTek.”

Dazzler peered up at Alastor with a cheeky smile, seeking his approval upon praising the hotel management as “better.” His eyes fluttered as he realized just how he had been staring, and he sat up straight, responding briefly with a chuckle. Out of nerves he reached up to adjust the lapels of his jacket.

“I had to find my own shitty place to live when I was working there full time… so it's extra nice to have bosses who really seem to care and-”

She seemed to get nervous all at once again, and she turned her gaze fully towards him, showing him a big, apologetic and nervous smile.

“Oh… Um. Sorry, I'm probably getting a little too sentimental,” she said sheepishly, clearly made to feel awkward from the silence.

Alastor expertly avoided stammering, holding himself together well as he replied. “Mm… n…o, no, you're quite fine! It's good to hear you're happy here. Actually I’d say it pleases me greatly to hear that.”

What was he saying?

She seemed as surprised as he was.

“That we’re providing such a positive work environment,” he corrected quickly, shifting into a properly authoritative and friendly voice. “You’ve become a valued member of the team and we’re grateful to have you here, Dazzler!”

That seemed to fool her well enough.

“Aw, thanks!” She chirped, quickly recovering from how foolish she felt, opening up to him so unexpectedly.

“You’re very welcome,” Alastor replied, smiling widely as he moved to stand. She followed suit, rising from her seat. Alastor extended a hand to her over his desk. “And thank you, Dazzler, for attending this meeting. I would say your review is finished for now. Do keep up the good work, my dear.”

Dazzler’s ears perked upright, twitching slightly. Her ears fell back, as she glanced between his hand and his face, with a clear look of skepticism on her expression.

Alastor chuckled, his smile widening and his eyes squinting at her. He was used to this.

“Come now, dear, not every handshake is a deal with the devil.” His voice was level, though she could tell he was clearly amused by her cautiousness.

She reached out to take hold of his hand.

There was a brief pause in both of them. Alastor’s eyes fluttered open, staring down at their hands as they hovered over the desk, frozen in place.

No handshake. No movement. Just silent contact.

Dazzler’s smile seemed to falter, her ears slowly dropping back.

Slowly, tentatively, their eyes drifted upward, and locked onto one another.

Static. Soft, barely audible.

Alastor shook her hand, and swiftly retracted.

“You enjoy your evening, now!” He said finally. Dazzler stood in place, her hand slower to retreat than his. Her body loosened and she looked away.

“Th-thanks,” she uttered, turning quickly to leave. “You too, Alastor!”

“Sooo, how’d it gooo?” Angel Dust crooned, grinning as he heard Dazzler wandering into the kitchen. He stood in front of the stove, preparing a meal for the three of them. Niffty was sitting on the counter beside him, clapping excitedly as the doe demon entered.

When Dazzler said nothing Angel looked over his shoulder at her. She stood in the doorway, wide-eyed and staring up at him.

“...Girl, you okay?”

“I fucked up the handshake at the end,” Dazzler groaned. Angel snorted and burst into a fit of laughter. Niffty kicked her feet with glee and laughed along with Angel.

“Oh no!” Angel cried, dramatically placing a hand to his chest, and the back of another hand to his forehead, clutching the wooden spoon he was using to stir the noodles. “Now he'll never fall for you! Not now that he knows you suck at handshakes!!!”

“B-but, he, like?? Held onto my hand?” Dazzler's voice cracked a bit. The laughter stopped in an instant.

“Oooooooooooh!” Niffty suddenly sang out, hopping onto her feet on the countertop and bouncing in place. “Boss likes yooooooou!”

Dazzler turned, plopping her back against the door frame, her hands over her face. Her cheeks were burning up, she was blushing so hard. She let out a strangled little scream into her hands, clearly overwhelmed.

“Dazz, quit freakin’ out, whaddaya mean he held your hand??” Angel’s voice was frantic, and his eyes were wide with a desperate curiosity.

Dazzler lowered her hands to her chest, stepping into the kitchen further.

“I mean we went in for the handshake but like. Stopped before we shook.”

She stepped up to them, standing in front of Niffty’s spot on the counter. Her ears dropped back as her mind reeled, trying to replay that moment.

The touch of his hand. The way he looked up at her. That pause.

“I don't know why he…” She trailed off, staring at the floor.

“Uh, ‘cause he's fucking into you?” Angel snapped quickly. He turned to face her, reaching out to grab her shoulder. “Holy shit did you flirt with him?? That's how you get him literally into you.”

“Fuck- shut up!!” Dazzler whined, lifting her hands to gesture wildly as she spoke. “I did, but I felt fucking stupid!”

“Whaaat?” Angel scoffed. “You flirt all the time! With anyone! Always!”

“Yeah, when I wanna fuckin’ get laid.”

“Ain't that what you want with Al?”

“No!!! Y…yes? I don't know,” Dazzler groaned, sliding her back down the counter until she sat in a sad mess on the floor. “I… don't… feel like… this, about the people I usually fuck around with.”

“She’s down bad,” Niffty giggled, laying on her stomach and hanging her head down to stare at Dazzler. “Down icky! Down unwell! Down atrocious!”

“Down atrocious,” Dazzler repeated, nodding softly. “I don't get down atrocious when I hook up.”

Angel placed a hand on his hip, returning to stirring the pot as he looked down at her.

“Whaddaya mean?”

Overstimulated from all this, after an already overly stimulating meeting with Alastor, Dazzler’s emotions were starting to boil over. Her filter was gone, as she wound up talking about this more seriously than she wanted.

“Fucking is just… Like, to feel something. I don’t even wanna fuck randos, I want them to fuck me, like, tell me I’m fuckable.” Dazzler tilted back her head, staring up at the ceiling. “No strings attached. With Alastor it's like… I want strings. And I’m scared of strings? Ugh… This metaphor is so fucking stupid…”

Angel took his time considering this, staring into the pot, and glancing over to the meatballs simmering in sauce on the other burner. Before he could form a response, Dazzler kept going.

“Sorry,” she mumbled. Angel looked back down at her. “That was random. Alastor’s driving me insane. This ‘do I or don’t I’ want to date him thing is killing me. And with Vox… I don’t… I don’t even like Vox. I just like that he wants to fuck me. Or, he did…”

“Hey, calm down, Dazz,” Angel Dust replied, his voice softer now. “You’re okay. You’re spiralin’. You don’t have to explain yaself right now.”

Niffty slid off the counter to fall into Dazzler’s lap, kicking her little legs as they hung over the edge of Dazzler’s thigh.

“You’re okay, Dazzie,” she said, her expression bright. “Boss drives everyone crazy!”

“Yeah…” Dazzler said with a sniffle. She was trying hard to restrain her tears. A sad smile crossed her face. She realized she’d been feeling like an idiot literally all evening so far.

Angel tapped the spoon against the edge of the pot, before putting his hands on his hips and turning to face her fully. He leaned down to look at her properly.

“Listen, don’t worry ‘bout it right now. We can talk about it sometime, okay?” He offered with a gentle smile. “I cooked some food for the three of us, some spaghetti 'n some meatballs.”

He squinted down at her with a playful frown, jabbing at her with the wooden spoon.

“And it ain’t ‘cause I’m Italian. It’s ‘cause I know it’s one-a yer faves.”

Dazzler couldn’t help but laugh, which made Angel’s smile grow wider. He grabbed up the pot with a couple oven mitts, and turned towards the sink. Dazzler held Niffty in her arms as she stood up, the little one-eyed demon giggling as she held on.

“Thanks, Angel. And thanks Niffty. You guys are too nice to me,” Dazzler said with a sniffle.

The air in Alastor’s room crackled and hummed with a panicked audio fuzz as he sat motionless in front of his fireplace.

Not even in one of his armchairs, just on the floor. He sat with his knees drawn upright and arms resting upon them, crossed and holding up his chin. It felt the most appropriate pathetic position for whatever the hell this feeling was.

Yearning? No. God, no.

Moping. Surely.

It had been hours since the review, since that handshake, and the electricity pulsing through Alastor from that moment hadn’t dissipated even a little bit.

This… this was bothersome.

Agonizing.

His ears were flat, pinned back and nearly flattened to his head.

That was the first time they had ever touched hands.

So what?! Why does it matter?! Alastor groaned inwardly.

She held onto his hand.

Clearly she doesn’t know how to give a decent handshake, he explained to himself.

Their eyes met, there was electricity in the air.

Nothing more than a cordial glance while we shook hands.

She made static radiate from him without him even meaning to.

I must have been trying to intimidate her, right? Why wouldn't I? She can't just hold on to my hand like that.

He hoped they would touch again.

No. No, don't you dare.

Alastor’s heart ached at the thought of his slender fingers grazing across hers, their palms meeting. He imagined just the handshake, at first, replaying that moment in his office over and over.

Until his mind wandered.

Intertwining fingers, lacing them together, his thumb stroking along her soft skin… Him lifting his head to see her smiling face as she looked up at him so tenderly…

Alastor placed his hand on the armrest beside him, clawing into it hard as he stood himself upright. He got to his feet, inhaled deep, and closed his eyes.

With an exhale, he peered down at the fire, finally letting the tension in his body release.

“I have to talk to Rosie about this,” he grunted.

#self ship #self ship community #self ship fic #self shipping #self insert fanfic #my fics

5 notes · View notes

luckystarchild · 6 months

Note

V: Are there certain comments you’ve received on your stories that have stuck with you?

Absolutely. I've received some incredibly kind words both on Lucky Child and on stories from my fanfic writing past, and I remember all of them fondly. (I have a document where I save some of my favorites.)

I admit there's a certain style of comment that sticks with me more than anything. This style of comment is left on Lucky Child with frankly hilarious regularity, and it always follows the same formula:

I clicked on this story fully intending to mock and make fun of it.

Self-inserts suck, and I usually read them just to hate on them.

I DO NOT LIKE SELF INSERTS.

SELF INSERTS ARE LARGELY GARBAGE.

....however.....

.....I can't believe I'm saying this....

.......I promise this is not how I normally feel about SI fics.....

BUT.... BUT I LOVE THIS FIC???

WTF zsdgsdfhsrtur I LOVE THIS???

Somehow you may have changed my mind about self insert stories.

WTF????

I love this kind of comment.

The first time I got one like it, I thought it was a hate comment. They spent MULTIPLE paragrpahs telling me how much they loathe and detest self-inserts. P A R A G R A P H S. But then I watched them slowly, carefully admit they loved LC, an SI fic? That they loved the thing they once hated? That the bedrock of their fan identity (that of a dedicated SI hater!) had been called into question because of my work? Oh, that was DELICIOUS. And every time I get this kind of comment (because again, it happens more often than you think) I relive that joy.

I write for one of the most mocked genres of fanfic, and any time I can change someone's mind about it, I wear that accomplishment as a personal badge of honor.

And the cherry on top? It's when they say they'll give other SI fics a chance. Nothing better than that!

#luckychildfanfic #starcharterfanfic #self insert #self insert fanfic

14 notes · View notes

kakusu-shipping · 11 months

Text

The Fight

Trying to pick up the pace a little bit, but I'm not very good at writing action so this might be a bit clunky. Please excuse me.

Mountain's Peak (Part 1)

Nepal Sanctum (Part 2)

Talk it out (Part 3)

In which we let it all out

Ramattra found his brother exactly where he expected to; Tucked away on the highest roof top of the Monastery's temples, an old withered place few monks visited simply for the egregious amount of single wide stairs clearly poorly placed by the original builders.

"Brother Mondatta is looking for you," Ramattra spoke with no worry of startling his brother, positive Zenyatta had already sensed his approach at least three levels down. The fact that he hadn't run was a good sign.

"He can look a while longer.." Zenyatta replied, relaxing from his curled up position to allow his legs to dangle over the edge of the building.

Ramattra sat himself down beside his brother, taking a moment to appreciate the view. The sun was setting, stars had started to dot the soft pink sky. From this high up, one could truly see on into forever if they desired to.

"You hit the human..." Ramattra finally pressed, giving a glance to Zenyatta, who curled back in on himself slightly.

"I did."

"You said you would only use what I taught you in self defense."

"I did not use what you taught me, dear brother. I used my fist."

Ramattra couldn't help the slight chuckle hearing his elder defend himself so sharply released. If he could still shoot back, then he couldn't be all that tore up about what he'd done.

"Mondatta will expect an apology when we finally return."

"I did nothing to him." Zenyatta once again uncurled himself, his legs once more dangling over the building's edge as he relaxed into the flow of conversation with Ramattra.

"To the human, Brother."

Zenyatta released a loud, dramatic sigh noise, clunking his head into Ramattra's shoulder. "I would rather be placed on cattle clean up for the next 7 years."

Ramattra chuckled once again, "And I would love to assist you with such chores, but that is not Mondatta's way."

"No... I suppose not..." Zenyatta's voice softened as he once more pulled his knee to his chest, placing a hand on the ground next to Ramattra for balance.

Ramattra found his hand placed gently over his brother's, keeping his sensors locked to the stars as he leaned his head atop Zenyatta's.

With the sunrise the brothers would make their way back down to the village, they'd catch Master Mondatta on his way back from his morning meditation, when the monastery is silent and the human is still asleep. Zenyatta would give his apology, and be given laundry duty in return, with Ramattra would happily assist with despite Mondatta's preaching on how one must face their misdoings on their own.

That would all come tomorrow. For tonight, the two sat peacefully on the temple roof top, hands intertwined in a painfully human way, counting stars until the sun arose the next morning.

That stare made everyone in the monastery uncomfortable. Bright red eyes that only ever saw the monks as who they were, what they had been made for, how they'd failed or succeeded at a task that had been forced upon them.

It was sickening.

Across from Zenyatta stood the human, shouldering off thick layers of cloth and robes and scarves until only one remained, tied tightly off at his waist by a cream orange cincture belt. He then removed the thick, straw woven snow boots Mondatta had made for him, stepping bare foot into the chalk drawn circle of the training area, holding his hands up in a ready pose.

He'd kept his eyes locked on Zenyatta, not in a glare of malice, or even his usual annoying fascination, but a neutral look that challenged him without words.

Ramattra's hand grabbed tightly to the back on Zenyatta's upper robe. He was shaking. He was going to stop this.

Zenyatta shoulder off his brother's grasp and the robe along with it, leaving him in only his pants and the red cloth he'd kept tied around his waist.

Stepping into the ring, Zenyatta stood wide and placed his palm against the human's, keeping their gaze locked.

"If you win, I'll leave. Permanently. And I'll tell every human I meet they're not welcome here." Emile spoke evenly, despite the rapid pulse Zenyatta could feel coming from their freezing fleshy hand.

He tilted his head in amusement, "And what will you get if you happen to win?"

This was the sort of confrontation that would usually draw this particular human to tears, so it was quiet the shock to see him hold together while speaking. "You can decide that when it happens."

'When' Zenyatta thought on, wrapping his fingers around the human's small hand. It was cold, and soft, and easily crushable in even the flimsiest of Omnic hands.

"Usually a match is called when one is forced from the ring, but that feels a touch too easy, wouldn't you agree?" The human nodded along with Zenyatta's proposal, "So we keep going until one of us taps, agreed?"

Zenyatta watch the human give a small nod once more

And then kicked them as hard as he could right in the stomach

Emile flew out of the ring, scratching to a stop along the stone flooring. He hacked and coughed, gripping onto his stomach. If he'd eaten anything for the past few days he surly would have hurled it up.

"Get up." Zenyatta spoke from the ring. The human did as commanded, pulling himself up on shaky legs. He did not glare at Zenyatta for landing the first blow, he did not look on in fear for how much stronger his opponent was, he did not bask in awe at how mighty a kick it was. He kept his neutral expression.

And that pissed Zenyatta off worse than anything else.

Blow after blow, the human continued to get back up. Even after he'd started spitting up blood. Even after his glasses were shattered on the stone ground, rendering him near blind. Even after he'd stopped being able to feet his fingers in toes in the cold and after his arm stopped moving and after his ankle had made such a horrible crack and swollen to the size of an orange.

And even after Zenyatta still stood perfectly pristine.

Emile hadn't landed a blow on his opponent. Zenyatta was starting to doubt he was even trying to. Had he even raised his hand once to the monk? Had all he done was stand there and take Zenyatta's blows?

Zenyatta clenched his fists, "Get Up." He demanded, as he had over and over again, to the human laying still on the stone before him. "Get Up and Hit Me."

Emile's form shook as he pushed himself up with only one arm, his white hair dangling before his face, tips red from his own blood. As commanded he got up on shaky legs once more and looked to Zenyatta with those red eyes that pierced into his history, a history he'd been trying so hard to ignore, to hide and run away from.

"Get up." Zenyatta demanded again after landing a hard hit right into the human's nose. It was broken for sure.

Emile did as commanded.

"Brother, that is enough-" Ramattra reached to grab Zenyatta, to put an end to this, but stopped inches away.

"It's not enough..."

The human's voice was ragged, breathless and broken and shaking. He sounded on the brink of death.. He very well might have been.

"It's not... enough...."

Blood mixed with tears down Emile's face, big wet eyes stared at Zenyatta, making the Omnic hesitate.

Ramattra wouldn't dare touch a human, but he made a motion like he was going to either way, "Human you cannot take much more, please just call it-"

"I CAN'T." Emile's voice cracked, he coughed, and took a step just to keep himself from collapsing, "I can't... it's not... enough... yet...."

The human but his hand on his wrist, and Zenyatta found himself mimicking the motion. His finger tips touched delicately at his exposed arm wire, one of many fragile pieces of himself he'd been forced to show to the world after nearly loosing his life before coming here.

He could still feel the human's cold finger tips on it...

"it's not... enough... to... ma...ke up.. for what... i..."

His body was too heavy, everything hurt, and the world was spinning.. In his last few moments of consciousness Emile braced himself for one more cold embrace from the stone steps of the battle field..

And instead found warmth...

#Emile's Writing #In which Zenyatta beats me the fuck up #Ramyatta #In the first half at least... Hinted at any way #That's the INTENTION any way they do have feelings for one another but aren't. Like. Together really #Self insert #Self insert Fanfic #Proselfship #Proship Selfship #Zenyatta #I SHOULD probably actually tag him for these.... but I don't kgdjbkgfkjg I'll get better about that #This was SUPPOSED to be the last chapter of the Nepal Youths arc with Delinquent Zenyatta buuuuuuut #We've got one more to go now and then we can stop having Delinquent Zenyatta #But sensitive fraidy cat Ramattra is staying for a few more chapters because I LOVE HER #Anyway. Thanks for reading if you did!#Sorry the fight's kind of choppy like I said I'm not good at them #But it's necessary #This is one of those things I'd bring up with modern Zenyatta that'd make him want to curl up and explode ksdfjsdk #Genji would not believe me if I told him about this

8 notes · View notes

thesolarangel · 9 months

Text

Aaah so many smut fanfic ideas, so little time...

I'm thinking: reader lying down on their back, Astarion fucking them and Halsin fucking Astarion from behind. I call it:

✨Astarion sandwich of dreams✨

#Halsin x reader x Astarion #Halsin smut #Astarion smut #Self insert fanfic

55 notes · View notes

deathcapyandex · 5 months

Text

Known Only By Alias

[known only by Alias]

A self indulgent loid forger x yandere self insert.

Yandere in the sense of reclaimed and coping with bpd by using my blorbo and f/o thank you.

Symptoms expressed include obsessive tendencies, jealousy and possessiveness.

Probably just gonna be the one fic unless I decide to write more about loid.

May or may not be replacing Fiona.

Code name Twilight, the agent currently going by the name Loid Forger was a highly respected person in the agency. Damn good at his job too.

Code name Sparrow, the agent assigned to a mission designated in twilights area was also assigned as a neighbor in case of backup or cover during twilights mission was needed.

Today was move in day, sparrow had just arrived at the apartment with their things and started settling in.

Residents had noticed the boxes and furnishings being moved in priar to their arrival and seemed to have created a little buzz, gossiping about the new neighbor moving in, so they expected to meet some people and have to introduce themselves a bit.

No problem, nothing to be nervous about, it would be easy enough. However the thing they were worried about, was actually meeting Twilight.

If they were to cooperate together for the first time, first impressions had to go well!

Though, this meant meeting the rest of the forger family as well. Sparrow looked forward to meeting his fake wife least of all.

They would have immediately volunteered to be assigned that role had they not had an assignment already prior, for the sake of the mission of course, another agent as skilled as sparrow surely would have been much better fitting.

But due to the shortage of agents available at the time limit twilight had upon starting his mission, he had to rope in some civilians. Unfortunate.

At the very least sparrow could be there close by to make sure things went smoothly for twilight. If this mission didn't go well, his reputation as an agent might get tarnished and the agencies entire operation could be at stake or worse. Being around twilight alone was quite the honour and a nice bonus too.

Though, having a seperate mission of their own would get in the way every now and then, they just hopped it didn't become too much of a hindrance.

For now it was time to play the part of the good neighbor.

A knock at the door of their apartment broke up the agents thoughts. They set down the books they were absentmindedly organizing in the living room, setting them on top of the low set bookshelf and walking to the entrance to answer the door.

A peak through the eye hole showed them the face of a blonde man, one glance at the pin on his blazer immediately told sparrow who he was.

They opened it to find a blonde man, a dark haired woman and a small girl. The forgers.

"hello" sparrow greeted with a polite smile.

"hello, I'm Loid Forger. This is my family, my wife Yor and our daughter Anya." He motioned to them both as he introduced them. "We're your neighbors nextdoor. We moved in just last month ourselves and we noticed you're new so we thought we would introduce ourselves."

"it's very nice to meet you all. I'm Sind Dufaux." They introduced themself in return.

"it's a pleasure to meet you mx. Dufaux! We were wondering if you'd like to join us for dinner tomorrow night" Yor spoke up with a bright smile, seemingly excited.

"that sounds lovely, thank you, I would" sparrow replied with an almost mirrored expression.

"it's settled then- ah, Anya, it's rude to stare, say hello" Loid spoke to his daughter.

The little girl stood staring with an awed expression at Sind, like something about them caught her by surprise in the "better than I imagined" way a child usually expresses.

*this kids pretty cute in person*

Anya smiled brightly "Hi!! I got a doggy and his name is Bond! You wanna meet him??"

"They can meet Bond tomorrow when they come over for dinner, sweetie" Yor pointed out with a chuckle.

"right!" Anya nodded with enthusiasm.

"well then, all that's settled. It was a pleasure meeting you Mx. Dufaux. We'll leave you be now" Loud nodded.

"it was very nice to meet you all too." They replied.

Loid and Sind exchanged a glance as the forgers left. A knowing nod, then the door was shut.

All seemed to have gone well. Though they could have done without Yors enthusiasm, twilight at the very least acknowledged them as a co-worker now.

And so starts the new fake life, two agents who only know each other by alias assigned to work together. If they didn't know better it was as if they were in some sort of romance novel. But no, of course not, this was strictly professional, and all for the sake of both their missions.

While sparrow was more than happy to lend twilight a hand, they would have to begrudgingly do so with Yor in the way.

Surely though, it will work out in the end.

Don't mind writing more if anyone is interested

13 notes · View notes

di-writes-stuff · 10 months

Text

Cowboy Like Me

Arthur Morgan x fem!Reader

Chapter 4

A/N: Let’s hope the tumblr gods actually let people see this.

TW: Mild s€xual tension, suggestion of a murd€r (self defense). Not much, mostly just crippling fluff.

Life, as you’ve experienced it, becomes quite boring once you’re no longer on the run. Maybe that’s why meetings with Arthur have become something of an event for you. You’ve opted to ignore the other, more likely reasons for your excitement surrounding these encounters.

You’re cautious as you approach the fence, being sure no prying eyes are watching as you sneak off to sell your goods from the train robbery. Your eyes quickly stop scanning your environment as you zero in on one thing, or man, in front of you.

Arthur Morgan.

There’s a soft smile on his face as he watches you bring your horse to a stop, the dreamy kind most don’t even notice they’re wearing. He straightens up, walking away from the tree he’d been leaning on and into the sunlight, the only shadow on his body the one from his hat, casting a bit of darkness over his face. He raises a hand to help you off your horse, gently leading you to the ground. Neither of you let go for a moment until a greeting that’s become sweetly familiar falls from his lips.

“Ma’am.” His voice is hushed as he looks down at you, his smile reaching his eyes, causing little crows feet to appear at the corners. Your voice is just as quiet as you respond, as if your simple greeting is some kind of hidden secret for only the two of you to know.

“Arthur.” His reaches out his hand out for the sack your carrying, full of everything you made off with from the train. The weight that had been dragging down your arm passes to him easily, like a feather in his capable hands. There’s not a discernible difference as he walks to the fence despite the added weight, leaving you to walk beside him to the jittery man waiting inside.

Few words are spoken between him and Arthur, and the ones that are stay hushed. The man in the shack is frail, beady eyes darting back and forth, constantly checking for any watching passerby’s. He ducks away into the darkness of his shack once the sacks are handed over like some kind of spooked animal, re-emerging with money in tow. He slides the wad of cash over to Arthur, hands shaky from either nerves or drugs.

The tiny bruises dotting the inside of his elbow tell you it’s the latter. Probably morphine, heroin if he’s really let himself go. A part of you thinks him pathetic, letting himself spiral like that. Although, a twinge of sympathy hits you as you remember living the life of a thief isn’t much better.

You and Arthur back away from the shed, under the cover of a sturdy oak. His fingers sift through the cash, hushed whispers falling from his lips as he counts it out. Three hundred in total, you try to be discreet about your own counting as he hands you your share. It’s not as if you don’t trust him in particular, it’s just…

You don’t trust anyone, not really. Same reason that, besides Arthur, you’ve avoided working with others for years, especially men. They never did give you your share in full, whether it’s because they thought you were too dumb to count, or they really didn’t see why you’d deserve as much as them. Either way, it usually ended with you either pickpocketing the rest of what you earned, or taking it all along with their life.

Men have a habit of getting awful violent when they don’t get their way. It was only natural you’d have to defend yourself every once in a while.

Relief floods you as you finishing counting. One fifty. Exactly half.

It shouldn’t mean as much as it does. Plain fairness, and maybe it’s just because your looking for reasons to defend how much you’ve come to like Arthur. Still, a warmth fills you as you look up at him, met with a small smile gracing his lips. His voice is a little teasing as he talks, although there’s a hint of nerves at the blank expression on your face. “Don’t tell me I counted wrong.”

You just shake your head, a smile creeping onto your face. “No…it’s perfect.” You fidget with the cash in your hands, suddenly shy under his gaze. The warm glow of the sunset washes over him, all his features looking just a little softer in this light.

“Ya flatter me, Miss.” The grin he flashes your way sends blood rushing to your face, your cheeks turning a shade awful similar to the pink sky behind you.

Arthur never thought himself to be a particularly charming man, quite the opposite actually. A dirty, dangerous, entirely un-appealing brute. Of course if he ever told you that your first instinct would be to inquire if he was blind.

Either way, a sort of boyish pride fills him at the response he seems to be able to draw from you so very easily. It’s a careful line he’s treading in his own mind. A balancing act to keep this what it’s been thus far. A logistical partnership, with maybe—definitely—some flirting along the way. Just for fun, though. Nothing more, no feelings, nothing that’ll keep him up at night.

Arthur opts to ignore that the latter stopped being true a while ago.

As you bid him your goodbyes and set off to your horse, there’s a moment where he isn’t quite sure he even finishes thinking about what he’s going to say before it comes out of his mouth. Just pure instinct to make this moment last longer.

“Let me take you home.” He offers, watching as you stop in your tracks, turning around with an expression caught between looking pleased and shocked.

As he awaits your answer, he’s already thinking up an excuse in his mind for his actions. Some way to write them off as nonchalant. Chivalry is what he settles upon this time. Not a desire to be around you rather than heading back to camp just to think of you instead. No, of course not that.

Chivalry. It’s getting dark, and while he knows you can defend yourself, you won’t have to if he’s there. Mostly because he’s a deterrent to dumb bastards trying to start a fight. Once they see him, they know they’ll lose. Although, if they do try, you certainly won’t have to be the one taking care of them.

Yes, that’s the reason. Nothing more, nothing less.

“I’d like that.” Your voice is soft as you answer. Arthur tries to push down the smile that threatens to creep onto his face at your response. Still, he can’t quite help the way the corner of his mouth quirks upward as he walks towards you.

It’s nothing more.

Chills run up from his arm as he helps you onto your horse, your hand so soft, so light in his own.

It’s nothing more.

As he looks up at you on your horse, the sun’s last dying beams seem to frame you, the kind of scene he’d stop to put down in pencil if it weren’t fading so fast. Memory will have to do, for this one.

It’s nothing more.

That ringing reminder grows quieter with each repetition, his ability to believe it dwindling along the way. As he rides back with you it’s silent for the most part, only the huffs from your horses and the sound of their hoofs hitting the ground filling the air. His eyes are keen, scanning your surroundings with a seemingly unrelenting fervor.

It makes sense for a man whose spent his entire life running from somebody. Or something. Nowadays it just feels like he’s in a losing race with the world, watching as the age of outlaws gets stamped out of existence little by little. His head snaps back to you as your voice breaks through the silence.

“So, how’d you end up here? Already one notorious gang in Valentine.” You ask, the mere suggestion of O’Driscoll’s fueling an anger in him from a feud that never was his own. Only adopted out of loyalty, or obligation. For Arthur, those two have always been of the same blood.

It takes a moment before he fully registers what you said, or more accurately, what you know. If he recalls correctly, which he knows he does, he never mentioned the Van Der Linde gang to you. Suspicion, the tiniest inkling of it, trickles in. “You know about the gang?” He asks cautiously, his voice a little lower.

Much to his surprise, laughter bubbles up from your chest as you respond. “I’ve seen the posters, Arthur. You’ve made no small name for yourself.” another bought of laughter leaves you as you add on. “Wonder what you did to earn your bounty.” A hint of shame stings in his mind at how fast he was to distrust you And how stupid he was to think you really had no idea who he was.

He chuckles lowly, the ease that comes with talking to you returning as fast as it left, only for a moment. A small reminder of the kill or be killed mentality most in his line of work still carry. That you even knowing some information about him felt, temporarily, like a threat. Yet, when he looks at you, the way your soft smile reaches your eyes as you wait for his response.

God, he’s a fool for even considering it.

Words return to him as he snaps out of his thoughts. “Wasn’t exactly one thing.” He answers, a twinge of sadness sinks in as he sees you start to steer your horse near a small house, the end of the night upon the two of you as you dismount. The light laughter that he always seems to bring about returns yet again, the sound making heat rise to his cheeks that he hasn’t felt since he was a teen.

“Oh, I’m sure you’ve got a slew of stories.” You comment, trying to drag the moment out as long as you can as you dismount, climbing the stairs to your door with Arthur close behind. As you turn around to face him he stops at the top step, not daring to set foot on the porch. Because both of you know you could open that door, invite him in for a meal. And a meal would turn into staying the night, and that night would only end in one place. And both of you know you’re considering it, parts of you you’re not willing to confess yet wanting it.

It would be so easy.

And yet he steps away, away from that hand that almost reached out of him, the lips that almost beckoned him in. His voice is a little strained as he replies with a tip of his hat. “Guess you’ll have to hear them another time, darlin’.” Disappointment fills you for a moment despite the regret you know you would have felt in the morning. Because if nothing else, you don’t want to become just another hazy, rushed night, kept only in bittersweet memories.

You want this to last. And in a way, he just told you in will.

“another time”

That’s what he’d said. Meaning that you would see him again. Meaning that he hadn’t tired of you yet. Meaning you weren’t completely deluded to think he might really like you.

You whisper your goodbyes, a sigh rushing through your lips as you shut the door behind you. Before you know it you’re reaching for the window, peeling back your curtain to watch him ride away until he becomes a small blip in the distance.

As for Arthur, the smile that appeared on his lips when he noticed your watchful eyes trailing after him doesn’t fade until he’s back to camp.

- di <3

A/N: I NEED HIM

#fanfic #fanfiction #fanfic writer #fanfiction writer #arthur morgan #rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #red dead redemption #self insert #self insert fanfic #arthur morgan rdr2 #arthur morgan x y/n #arthur morgan x you #arthur morgan x reader #fluff #mutual pining #rdr #rdr2 fanfic

42 notes · View notes

vermillioncrown · 1 year

Text

one (1) poorly timed dick joke as a treat in the conclusion of the dick grayson pentology

let's goooooo

#dc fanfic #self insert fanfic #on tpac #tpac.jpeg #phd.jpeg #phd-verse #verm scribbles #you guys are not fucking ready for this just saying #i was cry-laughing finishing the chapter #it's a hefty one but we're not going for the dick grayson hexology

68 notes · View notes

write-and-wander · 9 months

Text

Touch: Chapter 6

Pairing: Kylo Ren x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Swearing, angst, and a new version of the sequels

Word count: 4.6K

Author’s note: It's time to see the truth behind Kylo's desires, and to meet the others! P.S. Enjoy a little indulgence in a moment with Poe Dameron, just to spice it up a bit here :)

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5)

Chapter 6: Fate's Blade

The following few months had come and gone in a bit of a blur. Like clockwork, you would go through your daily routine, and on every fifth day you would stop by Coruscant to drop off the ship’s tracker before heading to Ahch-To for training with Luke. After a long day of rigorous training, getting the most out of your time together, you would stop by Coruscant again before getting back to wherever the Finalizer had traveled and heading straight to bed. In between your training, some days were hell in med bay with the odd failed battle or various attacks from the Resistance, while other days were oddly quiet; and in the midst of all of them, Kylo would make more consistent appearances. You would find yourselves beginning to gravitate towards each other more often, giving in to the will of the force that would stop at nothing to draw the two of you ever closer.

Despite the routine you had settled into and being satisfied with the progress you had been making through it, every once in a while you would have a day that strayed from the usual path.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

You woke up slowly in the morning, your body aching from the long day before. You had been sent out for on-site care, as the Finalizer was close to the battlegrounds and it was easier to go to them than to try to bring up some of the injured. You let out a yawn as you stretched, and suddenly noticed you could feel another body weighing down the opposite side of your bed. Turning, you saw Kylo asleep beside you. You sat up immediately, panic setting in. For a moment, you wondered if something had happened that you didn’t remember. However, having just returned to the Finalizer the night before, you knew that wasn’t the case.

“Kylo?” You asked quietly, nervous to wake up the Commander. You were met with no response. He was sound asleep, his slow breathing still even. Having adjusted to whatever this phenomenon was, you knew it would fade eventually, and instead got yourself ready for the day. At one point, you thought you heard your name, but when you returned to your bed to look, Kylo was gone. With a sigh of relief, you finished getting ready to go and took off to Coruscant.

The focus of your training that day was listening to the force- and not just in a meditative state or in combat, but in every moment. The force- being the very essence of life and the animated energy of the universe- could guide you at any time, and if you could hear and listen to the force in the simple and quiet moments, then it would be a much stronger guide in more high-stakes moments. Thankfully, that meant it wouldn’t be as exhausting or as long of a training day as you had grown accustomed to- though, it was just as tedious. Despite the fact that Luke was patient and gentle in his training, he was also precise, and would not be finished with a session until he was satisfied with your proficiency.

Upon reaching the conclusion of your training session, you decided to take an extra trip with your spare time and stop by Tatooine to visit the house of your recently discovered grandfather, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You had been there before, when Kylo had a tantrum looking for something there, but you wanted to revisit now that you knew your connection to the place. Before leaving Ahch-To, as you made it back up to your ship, your eyes drifted to the pile of weathered pieces of glass and stone left behind after Luke destroyed the pyramid you had. With a soft smile to yourself, you thought about Luke’s advice to, “seek opportunities to invite the force in,” and closed your eyes, thinking about the object. The moment you reached out to the force, it was dark- uncomfortably dark. The black abyss whispered to you with voices you didn’t recognize, only having heard them once before; not the comforting hum of the light, but the sharp hiss of darkness. You decided to push forward regardless, focusing on what you remember the object to look like, and reached into the thick shadows before you. Feeling around, your hands grazed cold stone. Reaching further down, you managed to grasp what feels like the pyramid, whole again. The darkness began to crawl up your arms, the whispers growing in volume and dissonance as you grasped the object. You took a deep breath in an attempt to quell the fear growing in the pit of your stomach and managed to pull it out, needing more strength than you thought you should, watching as the shadows retracted away from you. In your hand was the pyramid, whole again. You opened your eyes to see that the reality matched your vision as you held the repaired object. Looking at it now, a small red light glowed in the center. This one was different, somehow. You had a feeling this is how the pyramid originally was, before Luke and Doron made changes to it. You looked over to the cliffside to see the grass clean of all shrapnel. Yes! You thought, celebrating the pay-off of the risk.

As you stuck the pyramid in your bag, you saw flashes of a dark planet. Thunder roared overhead as winds kicked up the dust of the dead, flat earth. There was a dark presence, stronger than you had ever sensed before. The images faded just as fast as they came on, thankfully. You let go of the pyramid in a bit of a panic, feeling the weight drop in the bottom of your bag, and took off to Tatooine.

Landing in front of the old abandoned home, you felt lighter than you had expected. You were at peace here- like this place was always meant for rest and security. You wandered the halls and allowed your hand to drag against the wall, the white dust gathering on your fingertips and swirling in the almost-still air before settling on the ground below. You saw visions of the past again- an ability gifted to you by the force that you’ve finally started to grow used to- seeing Obi-Wan in his younger and older years, watching Luke and Doron play, and seeing a young, bright-eyed Luke learn of his past for the first time. This home was filled with your family, and you were glad to be present in that for a while.

After some time there, the sun began to approach the horizon, and you decided to grab some food from a nearby market before heading home, just to see what kind of things your grandfather and mentor had grown up with. You walked through the market, struggling to find something that looked appetizing amidst the podracer parts and other goods of questionable origin. At the same time, you pointedly kept an eye out for any bounty hunters or other sinister characters to ensure you’d make it back to your ship in one piece, as you knew these cities weren't the safest places to be. Finding something to eat, you packed it up in your bag and quickly began to make your way out before someone appeared out of a nearby alleyway and grabbed your arm.

“Hey, Kenobi.”

You stopped, pulling over to the side, not wanting to draw attention to yourself or cause a scene. However, your hands clenched into fists, prepared to put up a fight and make a quick escape if need be. More importantly, you thought of the newly-reconstructed device in your bag, and hoped that he wasn’t after it. “How do you know who I am?”

“I’m just here to tell you that you have friends who can help you,” he said as he glanced down at the crystal you had worn around your neck for as long as you could remember. It seemed like he might’ve recognized it.

You looked at the man’s face, skeptical of whatever it was he was trying to sell- or, worse, take. Admittedly, he was charming. His dark features made for a handsome face, complete with dark eyes that sparkled with a sense of excitement. He scratched his stubbled chin as you spoke again.

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“Yeah, that was intentional,” he quipped, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a piece of paper with coordinates written on it. “Take this.”

You obliged, grabbing the piece of paper and palming it swiftly as you also reached for his dusty green cloak, pulling it back so you could look for anything that could possibly identify him. Beneath the cloak was a unique leather jacket, well-worn-

“Hey, hey, hey,” he interjected, pulling his cloak closed, “let’s save that for another night, yeah?” He flirted with a wink. You stared back at him, struggling to keep up with whatever this interaction was.

“What do you want?” You hissed, grabbing his cloak to pull him close.

“Nothing!” He said immediately, putting a hand up in defense. “Well, no- I mean, we want you, but only come when you’re willing.”

You loosened your grip as the last word- “willing-” fell from his lips; an all too familiar phrase. Maybe he knew Luke, or someone close to him-

“Patrol’s coming, kiss me,” he whispered in haste.

“What-” You whispered back, not quite registering what he meant.

“Just- okay-” he cut you off, pulling you into him and pressing his lips against yours.

You stood still, stunned. But before you could even think to move, he pulled away. You heard a lower voice scoff- a grossed-out passerby, clearly antsy to move on with his day followed by a few sets of footsteps walking past.

“Sorry, I just- Ow!” He cried out as you dug the heel of your heavy walking boots into his toes.

“I’ll think about it,” you said as you lifted your foot, “but that kiss doesn’t help your case, you know.” You turned on your heel to walk away.

“No, I was just-“ he tried, but realized you weren’t turning back around for him as you continued walking. “Oh, never mind,” he mumbled, taking off in the other direction.

Stopping in Coruscant, you decided to hide the pyramid back in the false panel in your home, nervous to take it out with you again after the interaction you just had. With a moment to collect yourself and to hide the newly acquired coordinates amongst your things, you returned to the Finalizer.

On your way back, you thought about that kiss for longer than you would have liked to admit. It wasn’t your worst kiss, but definitely wasn’t the best either; it wasn’t really anything notable, in all honesty. But you wished it would have been someone else-

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

“Hey,” Luke calls out. Hearing your mentor say your name is what finally pulls you out of your thoughts.

“Sorry,” you mumble, refocusing your mind on the task at hand.

“We don’t have to train today if-”

“No, no, I need to. There’s just a lot on my mind.” You’re being generous, sure, but you definitely don’t want to talk about the things you’re thinking about.

“Leave it behind,” he reminds you. You nod, thankful that he doesn’t push any further.

“Okay,” you say with a deep breath, “I’m ready.”

“Here,” he says, holding out two lightsabers in his hands. One, you recognize- it was the saber you had brought to him when you first met. The other was unfamiliar.

You look up at him, silently questioning if you should take them. He nods. You take both.

“Interesting choice,” he says, one eyebrow raised. You realize he expected you to choose one; but both seemed to call to you.

“I should seek perfect balance, right?” You ask, feeling the weight of both sabers in your hands. At the same time, you can almost feel the force dancing between the two weapons- a dance between light and dark, like a passionate duel. Luke nods, a small smile growing on his face. “These blades balance each other out.”

“The force tell you that, too?” He asks, poking fun at your recent affinity for attributing most of your knowledge to the force.

“No. It shows me.” As you focus on the blades, the force brings visions to mind. Training in a beautifully constructed temple. Watching a beloved master die at the hands of a powerful warrior. Fighting in battle after battle. Sparring- as master and padawan. Another padawan clashing with the blade- she, too, wielding two sabers. Confidence. Conflict. Resolution. Rebellion. The blades clash together as a searing heat grows in the palms of your hands. Betrayal. Tragedy. The vision snaps to black, and your tear-filled eyes look up to see Luke again, his hand resting on your shoulder.

“This blade belonged to my father, Anakin,” he says, looking to the saber in your left hand- the one you had recognized. “and this belonged to his mentor, Obi-Wan,” he adds as he looks to the saber in your right. “You would make for quite the warrior, should you wield both well.”

You nod.

“One more thing,” Luke takes Obi-Wan’s saber from your hand and opens the hilt, revealing an empty canister. “You’ll need that,” he continues, pointing to the crystal you had worn around your neck all your life. Taking off the necklace, you unwrap the leather cord from around the crystal and place it into the saber. Luke closes the blade and replaces it in your hand. “Okay,” he finishes with a breath, “are you ready?”

You draw the blades from your sabers, your jaw hanging slightly in a moment of awe- I finally have my own lightsabers.

“An elegant weapon, isn’t it?” Obi-Wan’s voice echoes in your mind.

You smile to yourself and look back to Luke.

“Ready.”

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

You’re standing in med bay, organizing the latest shipment of bandages in one of the utility closets when Kylo enters the room, the sound of the doors opening making you jump. Your hand moves to your chest as you catch your breath, calming yourself. He greets you by name, his voice warped by his helmet.

“Commander,” you answer, intentional in your use of formalities in more public spaces. You almost ask him what he’s visiting for, but you stop yourself, remembering that he would usually bring a prisoner to you around this time of the week. It made for your least favorite days as one of the Order’s medics, but you prefer to have the chance to comfort the poor souls they took in rather than handing them off to a droid. There’s clearly something about putting people in the hands of another living, breathing person that lifts their spirits, if even for a moment. It also would also give you a chance to really take your time and keep them for as long as you could, allowing them a break from whatever hell Kylo and the other leaders on the ship would put them through.

Come to think of it, actually, you had yet to see Doron in med bay. You’ve been hoping to see him ever since you found out the truth about him being your father, but you’ve heard nothing since they brought him in.

Kylo must have noticed your train of thought running away from you, as eventually he speaks up again, bringing your attention back to him. “I notice you’ve been taking advantage of the ship.”

“I have. Thank you.”

“What do you do on Coruscant?”

You feel your body tense at the realization that he had, in fact, been checking the ship’s tracker all this time. You’re thankful that you’ve been careful about it. “I enjoy being home as often as I can.”

“Was Chandrila not your home too?” he presses, clearly for a reason. He was looking for something.

“Sure, but it’s not the same as a childhood home,” you respond, hoping that he wouldn’t continue to push.

He hums.

“Do you have anyone for me to tend to today?”

“No. The few we had have been executed,” he answers, his tone more relaxed than you would like considering what he was saying.

Your eyes widen. Doron.

“Is something wrong?” Kylo asks, clearly having taken notice of your reaction.

“What about-”

“The man? Doron?”

You turn to Kylo. That bastard knows, doesn’t he?

“Snoke ordered for his execution yesterday.”

“While I was gone?”

“Would you have preferred to watch?” He asks, almost pouring salt on the wound. You pause for a moment, horrified by his words.

“You knew,” you spat, rage boiling in the pit of your stomach.

If you could have seen under his helmet, you would see the internal conflict clear on his face. On the one hand, he’s had yet to see you angry, and it’s beautiful to him. It’s promising. On the other, your attachment to Doron could mean you are, in fact, tied to the resistance. His own anger begins to fester. He decides to push.

“I don’t, actually,” he challenges.

“I never saw him once!” You threw down a bundle of wraps that you had been clutching, “What did you do to him?!”

“He-”

“No, what did you do to my father?!” The question slipped out of your mouth before you could stop it. His demeanor shifts. Shit.

“You are with the resistance?” he asks, almost growling in a tone lower than you’ve ever heard.

“Kylo!” You scream, pushing him hard. His back slams into the wall behind him. The doors begin to open- likely troopers trying to come in and subdue you- but Kylo lifts his hand to hold them shut.

“I granted him a swift death- much more than any of those animals deserve.”

“Animal?! He was-”

“Trying to ruin everything!” Kylo bellows, his figure now looming over you. “People like them always ruin everything! I killed him for our own good!”

Looking up at him, you realize you’ve been backed into a corner. You try to push him away from you, but he catches your hands in his.

He hisses your name. “Can’t you see?”

You shake your head, feeling panic and confusion begin to set in and pierce through your own rage.

He takes his helmet off with his free hand and throws it against the wall just above your head, making you jump. You feel his hot breath hit your face as he speaks. “You asked why the force brought us together- this is it. Don’t you feel that? The power your pain gives you?”

You think on his words, helpless to do much else. I do feel powerful. The low hiss of dark whispers flood your mind again, cooing: ‘Good. Let your anger drive you. Give in to your pain.’ You pull away from the darkness, recognizing the feeling of the shadows clawing towards you, desperate to latch on.

“This is bringing you to your greater purpose,” Kylo adds, standing back so that he’s no longer leaning over you. “We could rule the galaxy together. Do what our grandfathers failed to do. You and me.” He extends his hand to you. “Join me,” he pleads in a whisper as soft as a prayer, “please.”

As much as you desperately want to see the man you still believe was within him, at this moment, you can only see the monster who took your father from you and enjoyed it. You shake your head, running to the doorway. As the doors finally draw open, the troopers outside immediately draw their blasters on you.

“Let her go,” Kylo bellows from inside. They obey, and you rush back to your quarters with tears streaming down your cheeks.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

After a few hours, you had cleaned yourself up and packed the absolute necessities. You head to the hangar, making a point to avoid Kylo, Hux, and any other person of note that shouldn’t see you leaving right now. Thankfully, you get to your ship without issue. Dropping your bag off inside, you take the tracker you had grown accustomed to constantly removing and replacing, and you set it down in the stall your ship was parked in. With it there, and with the luxury of having a ship that looks like most of the other ships in the hanger, you should be able to buy some time before anyone notices you’re really gone. With a deep breath, you take off, staring at the coordinates written on the crumpled piece of paper in your hand. It’s time to find these “friends.”

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Arriving at the resistance base, you're anxious. You were riding in on a ship that clearly belonged to the First Order, following the coordinates and instructions of a man you were completely unfamiliar with, hoping that you did, in fact, have friends here willing to help. It’s a gamble. But, considering your other options, it’s a gamble you’re willing to take.

As you approach the base, a radio transmission comes through asking you to identify yourself.

“I was told to come here to find friends who want to help me. I don’t know the name of the man who-”

“You don’t need to, Kenobi,” a familiar voice cuts in, “I was hoping you’d come.”

Your shoulders finally dropped as you relaxed. Thank the force, he remembers.

When you land, your ship is immediately ushered to a different area to be repainted so as to avoid drawing any attention to the First Order’s ship residing among the resistance’s ships. The first person to greet you as you arrive is the same man who found you on Tatooine and gave you the coordinates for this place. You learn is name is Poe Dameron, also known as ‘the best pilot they’ve got,’ according to him.

He takes you by the hand and walks you through the base, showing you where everything is and introducing you to just about everyone you run into on your mini tour. You struggle to keep up with all the places and names, and he takes notice after a while, deciding to slow his pace and only point out the essentials. At one point, as he talks, your mind begins to wander back to your first interaction with him, on Tatooine. Does he ever think about it still? Is it something he’s used to? Is he going to acknowledge that it happened, or does he just want to move on from it? Eventually, your thoughts wander back to the conversation at hand as Poe rambles on about the exciting new developments that have come along with some of the droids on base.

At the end, Poe introduces you to his other friends, Finn and Rey, and of course, the leader of the whole operation, Leia Organa. Though you’re quiet at first, worried about taking too much of their time- or really, not being worth the time and effort it would take to have you join the effort- you eventually warm up to your new friends. Leia is headstrong, brilliant, and kind- like the kind of person you hope to be someday. Finn is intuitive, selfless, and clearly very brave, based on some of the stories the others told you about him. Rey is optimistic, tough, and confident; and her connection to the force seems to only amplify those things. Poe fits right in, being loyal, persistent, and selfless, even if he is a little snarky sometimes. You also eventually learn that Leia is Luke’s twin sister- after she tells you, of course, you can’t unsee it- and that Rey has been training under Luke as well, honing in on her abilities with the force.

After some time spent on the base, you grow more comfortable with the environment and with the people in it. Rey finally asks you about your story, wondering how you ended up here. Though hesitant, you eventually tell your friends everything. You tell them about your relationship with Kylo, giving a summarized overview from your first interaction with him up to your last. You tell them about your training with Luke, and your father’s ties with the Skywalkers. You tell them about your lost memories, and your goal to get them back.

“I may be able to help with that,” Rey says, having been deep in thought for the past few minutes. “So long as our General is willing to assist,” she adds, looking back to General Organa.

Leia nods, “Of course.”

With a long bout of meditation, a few adjustments after multiple interruptions, and a group effort to reach out to the force for restoration, Leia and Rey help restore your memory in full.

In a moment, years of memories come flooding back into your mind. You remember your parents, your mother falling ill and your father learning how to parent you alone. You recall your favorite toys and the friends you had made on Coruscant. You remember learning about the force and your strong relationship with it, starting to train at an early age. You remember your father nervously trying to teach you how to listen to the force in all things, and how you were most interested in the force as a guide to help you care for others. You remember the day your father left, finally connecting it to waking up the next morning, alone and confused. While you still struggle to grapple with the pain and grief that comes with the decisions your father made, at the same time, there is a deep sense of joy and gratitude for the time you did have with your parents. While you didn’t get to see him one last time as an adult, you could rest now that you know who your father was.

You’re given a moment on your own to process through all of your memories and gather your thoughts. In doing so, you decide to stay with the resistance and help wherever you can. They are the closest you have to family for the time being, they actively care more for each other than they do for accomplishing their mission, and together you can end Kylo’s reign of terror. This is where you want to be- this is the side of history you want to be on.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

A few weeks later, you’re walking through the resistance base to find Rey and ask if she wants to train with you. You pause in one of the hallways, hearing voices in conversation. You step up to the door, listening in to hear them talking about a map of some sort that will guide them for the final battle.

“What was it called again?”

“A wayfinder. It’s meant to guide Sith.”

“Like a map?”

“Yeah, sort of. It's a pyramid, like a kind of three-dimensional guide, instead of a carving or a hologram.”

“How does a pyramid guide someone like a map?”

“Not sure…”

Their voices begin to fade as your mind immediately thinks of the stone green pyramid you’ve been holding onto all this time. The one that first brought you to Luke, but now will clearly guide you to somewhere else. The one that you were prepared to protect the first time you saw Poe. The one that Kylo Ren has been looking for all along. He was right. I am the key to finding it- because I have one of them.

You trace back through your memory and realize that it’s still sitting in the false wall in your home in Coruscant. You can give it to the resistance, and they can finally put an end to all of this.

But first, you need to find a pilot who is both willing and able get you to Coruscant and protect you along the way. Someone who is willing to do whatever it takes- no matter how risky- to succeed. Someone who will know exactly where to take the wayfinder, and what to say to General Organa when it shows up on the rebel base.

You need to find Poe Dameron.

(Part 7)

19 notes · View notes