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#THANK U BTW FOR UR ASKS i always love answering these :3
mail-me-a-snail · 9 months
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Vance have any thoughts on / experiences related to cyberpsychosis?
im not sure if this ask is directed at vance or is about vance, but either way i have talked about his cyberpsychosis at length before
(here as well)
(this one too, though it doesnt explicitly mention cyberpsychosis)
arasaka's primary experiment with him was figuring out how much is Too much. how far can they go without going over the edge. with every implant they chipped him with, they kept him on a short leash for a few days after the surgery for observation.
they wanted to see if his body would agree with or reject whatever it is that they gave him--not that he'd necessarily die if his body didnt take to it, only that it'd have been a waste of time and a perfectly good, custom made implant.
how much of a machine could they make this mostly organic body before it became something else entirely?
sometimes his body would accept it only for the implant to rot inside him days later. vance would be at least organic enough to exhibit biological symptoms; sickness, of course, fevers, cold sweats, nausea. bedridden for a week.
they'd study that too.
they didnt do this to him just to torture him--in fact, that was the least of the corp's motives. i cannot stress this enough, but arasaka did not want to hurt vance. not on purpose, at least. what good is a dog who flinches when a hand is raised against it? you want something that bites. you want something that bites when you tell it to, because it's good like that.
anyway.
once the implant passes the bio check, it has to pass a mental check. keep in mind vance is running maybe 7 or 8 implants at a time, not including his cyberdeck. that is a lot of strain on a human mind.
most of the time he can keep the biological ones running quietly in the background (pulmonary, cardiovascular, etc) but these all run on pre-established subroutines. if a new implant is introduced and vance is thrust out onto the field right away, those subroutines are gonna trip all over themselves trying to accommodate this new Foreign Object.
maybe they'd even think it an obstacle and bypass it entirely. so vances systems would have to overcompensate; dedicate a portion of his programming to the Act of ignoring the foreign implant; or even start writing an entirely new routine to accommodate it.
this wouldn't usually be in an issue...as long as he isnt in combat.
because that's when shit gets overwhelming.
that's when he has to focus on not only not getting shot, but writing these new programs; dumping useless data caches; hacking into some two or three people's layers of ICE, which are all disproportionate from each other and varied in both quality and depth.
it really isnt just implants that trigger cyberpsychosis though; it's stress. its trauma. and i think vance has had every chance to go cyberpsycho and every possible trigger to do so.
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cordeliawhohung · 8 months
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js discovered ur blog recently and i am FED. im gobbling up the writings ur brain has created god bless🙏🏻
what do you think of mafia!price reacting to his wife being insecure about her stretch marks from her pregnancy/postpartum?
ive been so worked up over my stretch marks cause ive been gaining weight recently😭😭 btw, its totally cool if u dont wanna do this...
remember to take care of urself ya :3👍❗️❗️🔥🔥🔥
thank you so much!! and oh my god i have THOUGHTS about this. i gained 40ish pounds in the span of a few months and my stretch marks are so deep i can run my fingers over them and FEEL them and it took me a while to learn that it's natural and to accept them as a part of myself, but god is it freeing. anyway. story.
mafia!141 masterlist
warnings: body image issues, slight postpartum depression, hurt/comfort, fem!reader
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You don't look in mirrors anymore.
Before you had your beautiful bundle of joy, your reflection had never bothered you. Really, there wasn't really anything you felt at all when you looked into one. All a mirror had been was just a tool. Something to guide your hands when styling your hair or to ensure you had cleansed the makeup from your face.
So quickly had that tool become a weapon.
Wretched and cruel, all the mirror seemed to reflect those days was everything you tried to ignore. The stretch of your skin, those atrocious lines that plagued your stomach and thighs; your eyes were magnetized to them every time you looked at yourself. Most of all, it reminded you that the day you gave birth to your daughter, you had become more than just a mother. You became a spectacle.
It's why you started wearing baggy clothes around the house because if you could muddle the shape of your body, maybe you could blur the crevices that shredded your skin. So when your darling husband snuck up behind you while you worked on folding laundry in the bedroom, your immediate instinct was to push him away. Despite how warm his arms felt around you with large, thick hands smoothing over your stomach, you were terrified he'd feel the parts of you that were broken.
"Everything alright, love?" John asked softly at your rejection. His fingertips slowly slipped off of your body but lingered as if he regretted the movement, and they seared as if he had dug claws into you, refusing to let go.
"Yeah," you answered, but you hated how broken you sounded, even to your own ears.
Your lie was obvious, not just in the tone of your voice but in the posture of your body. How sweaty hands held a half folded shirt against your stomach as if you could hide away the shame that ate away at you. Stepping to the side, John slowly lowered your hands away from you body and turned you to face him where you were met with the watery hue of his eyes.
"What's wrong?" he questioned, all but ripping the answer from your mouth.
You hated the way your lip trembled, how your shame crashed against you with such overwhelming force you nearly suffocated. There were countless times when you had been bare in front of him, laid out perfectly in bed or on top of him with a sweaty body and quickened breath. So why did you feel more stripped in that moment than any other?
"Do you... still think I'm pretty?" you choked out.
John's expression didn't change much after those words left your mouth. It was as if he already knew what ailed you. In a way, he always seemed to know you better than you knew yourself.
"Do you think you are?" he countered.
"Not anymore."
He had expected that answer too, and yet still couldn't hide the way he nearly winced. You braced yourself for his rebuttal, for the string of words telling you that you were beautiful, that you were crazy to think otherwise. Your whole life, self deprecation was always met with stern correction, because god forbid you ever felt a little insecure.
But it wasn't that way with John.
Instead, he sunk to the ground until he was on his knees, and when he took your hands into his it felt as if he was proposing all over again. The love in his eyes, the way his thumbs ran over your knuckles, it was all so intimate, so raw, and your throat grew tight at the sight.
"You brought a beautiful, perfect girl into our lives," he said softly. His eyes didn't stray from you for even a moment. "Carried her for months. Nourished her; still nourishing her. I think it's a little unfair to expect yourself to stay unchanged. Doesn't make you any less beautiful. You're still my wife. My girl. The mother of my child."
It was impossible to stop the tears from spilling, and they only fell harder the moment John leaned forward and placed a soft kiss against your stomach. So tender, as if embracing an open wound and healing it all in the same motion. It was so kind, too kind, and it forced all of your thoughts and held back words to dissipate in the back of your throat.
"Darling, you're the love of my life," he said in a near whisper, "don't ever forget that."
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jolynesmom · 5 months
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hey can u share ur void success story? Would love to see it
hii this is the storytime I promised about getting into the void first try <3
disclaimer: this post is long asf, I like being very detailed when talking about such stuff because you may never know which insignificant detail might help someone + I always liked when people would go into detail about shifting or the void state
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this happened a few months ago. I’m a reality shifter and have been trying for around 4 years and never succeeded for more than a few seconds, so I got extremely burned out with the traditional methods
I decided to research about shifting on tumblr to see if the community is popular here as well (previously I’ve only researched about it on tiktok, reddit and a bit on youtube) and found a bit of general info about shifting, but what has gotten my attention was a person who got into the void state and instantly manifested their desires. I thought it looked a lot like shifting so I read some more
I knew a tiny bit about the void state from shifttok, but I’ve never been interested to learn more until that point. the og post said that they specifically reached the void state by doing yoga nidra so I thought it was a requirement for the void at that point. I didn’t know what yoga nidra was, so I sent the person a message asking about it and went about my day deciding I’m giving up on traditional methods and will start to work with the void state
for some reason I didn’t research any further that day (probably because I was burnt out by my shifting attempt the night before and didn’t feel like ingesting more information)
at night I decided to try to shift again. I drank blue lotus tea and put on a guided meditation. after 10 minutes I get bored and switched the meditation for white, brown and pink noises and fell asleep saying affirmations
I got woken up by my alarm at around 10 a.m. (I didn’t shift) and I tried to get out of bed to really woke up, but I ended up falling asleep until 11:30 a.m. when I got woken up again by my loud parents getting ready for work, so I tried to play on my phone to get more lucid and not fall asleep again because I didn't feel like getting out of bed, but I also didn't want to continue sleeping. my eyes were practically closing by themselves atp, but I went on tumblr and saw the person I messaged the night before answered my message and said they'll post a guide one of these days. after thanking them I closed my eyes again thinking of the void state. I remember saying to myself something like “I really want to get into the void, I can’t wait for the guide so I can do yoga nidra”
for the next hour I fell asleep for 10 minutes then woke up for 1-3 minutes at least 3 times (I was very tired, probably because of the previous shifting attempt) and my thoughts were completely blank;
at some point I find myself in my kitchen trying to make coffee and I couldn't tell if I was dreaming or not because the dream was very clear and I usually make coffee after getting out of bed so I thought I had finally woken up
I noticed the jar of instant coffee was almost empty and I asked myself "why is it almost empty, I bought a new jar yesterday" (I finished my jar yesterday and wanted to buy a new one today btw), then when I went pick up the jar I was instantly hit with the realization that I was lucid dreaming, so not even a second later I threw myself to the ground in a crisscross position to allow myself to fall through the floor and shift to my dr
when I hit the ground I closed my eyes and stated my intention of wanting to shift to my jujutsu kaisen dr, but I didn’t even get to finish my intention when I felt myself being pulled through the floor in an infinite dark void; I realized I entered the void state
I was calm, but really wanted to get to my dr, so I started affirming and visualizing. I felt myself being pulled again through the void, a bit lower, before stopping again
I got annoyed and started thinking of my dr again then started hearing a voice; I listened for a bit then realized I was hearing an argument between yuuji and megumi. I didn't understand because they were talking in japanese, but at the same time I understood the message?? they were arguing about how to exorcise a curse or something like that
the weird thing about their voices is that when I dream, lucid dream, visualize or make up scenarios, all the voices are quiet and muffled in the distance and the tone never changes, but the voices I was hearing were loud and clear as if I was next to them, which has NEVER happened to me before. I think I literally stood there frozen for 15 seconds because of how loud and real (?) their voices sounded
anyways
I was getting annoyed because I kept getting distracted and started saying affirmations and trying to imagine where I wanted to wake up. I couldn't feel my body the whole time, I was pure conciseness.
I told myself that as long as I shift, I don't care where I end up, then suddenly I started to hear more voices including a girl's voice (they were most probably people from other drs of mine).
I got confused and a bit alarmed, so I asked out loud what do I have to do to shift. suddenly all the voices got muffled and a man with a lower voice started talking to me in english. I didn't know who that was and I got confused, but tried my best to follow his instructions. I started to hear noises from my cr (the cars passing my apartment as I live in a noisy area) but tried not to wake up. because of the noises I woke up and suddenly I was in my room again. I panicked but didn’t open my eyes or move my body (I could semi-feel my body, but it was mostly asleep) and literally yelled in my mind ‘I want to get back into the void!!’ suddenly I’m in the void again, this time I didn’t feel the falling sensation, it was instant
back into the void I saw nothing was working I decided to shift to my waiting room because I remembered someone once saying that a waiting room is some kind of parallel located between your cr and other realities and this is why it can be easier to shift there. I intended to shift to my waiting room then felt how my body got pulled lower into the void again, then it suddenly stopped when I heard my phone buzzing in my cr because of a notification
I got extremely frustrated and decided to fully wake up
I woke up at around 1:20 p.m. and was very happy with what I just went through.
thinking about the last voice for a bit, I initially thought it was gojo, but it sounded too different to be him, plus the man was talking in english, so I figured it could've been zhongli from my genshin dr since I scripted english is an universal language in teyvat, but then I thought it was weird that he responded since I'm not very close to him in my dr, but after some more thinking I realized that we're actually connected in my dr so it kinda makes sense to be him, but I'm still not 100% sure, I'm only sure about hearing yuuji and megumi arguing
it took me an embarrassing amount of time to realize that when I was in the void and said I want to shift to my dr and started falling then stopped and I heard yuuji and megumi, I was actually in my dr and I just needed to wake up. I thought I would get woken up instantly just like with shifting methods, but I actually had to wake myself up from the void. my information was very limited because, like I said in the beginning, I only read one or two posts about the void state beforehand
it would also make sense to hear yuuji and megumi first thing before waking up in my dr, because I scripted that when they go in the school to get sukuna’s finger, I would be asleep in one of the offices (don’t ask) and will witness the whole thing
I think the way I got into the void is an actual method; I forgot the name of it but it might’ve been the phrase method, I’m not too sure
it also shows you don’t have to have a perfect mindset as I thought I can’t possibly get into the void until I do yoga nidra for a few days, so all you need is intention and an alternate state of consciousness
additional things (you can totally skip this if you want to)
after I got into the void state that day, I continued practicing the void state and I almost got into it at least 15 times, but instead of doing it via a lucid dream, I used the lullaby and distraction methods because I have a hard time lucid dreaming. every time I would be pulled into the void with these methods I would instantly think of my cr or get impatient and be immediately be pulled out, so I’m working on that and on how to lucid dream more often
I think I’m getting close into reaching the void again, because I’ve been working on meditation and started teaching my subconscious mind not to think of my cr while going into the void state.
the months of march and april were literally stagnant for me with no little to no success because I strongly believe I got the evil eye or something like that. at the end of february I went back to my home country (which is in eastern europe) to attend my cousin’s 18th birthday and I think I might have been cursed by one of the old ladies attending. I would always get the evil eye by them as a kid, but my grandma would usually remove it for me
my manifestations stopped and I couldn’t reach the void again but I thought it was because of work and uni related stress, but then it hit me it might be something else because I literally never had issues with my manifestations but suddenly I couldn’t manifest anything anymore, so I performed a cleanse and now I’m back again manifesting like it’s my job
a few nights ago I tried to get into the void, after like 8 minutes of meditation my body fell asleep while my mind was awake and I could’ve entered the void, but I sabotaged myself because I told myself I needed to go to sleep asap because I need to wake up in 3 hours for work so I moved around a bit and went to sleep
anyways, I’ll try to get into the void again and keep y’all updated. next month I go back to my home country where is peace and quiet so I think I’ll have a better time without stressing about uni, work or the noisy area I live in
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lovebvni · 4 months
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holaaa!! (dr rant + just an appreciation post)
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(TW SLIGHT HINT TO GROOMING)
soo i’m shifting soon and i decided that im going to make my first album when i get there (LIKE START JT, DUDE. START IT. IM SO EXCITED) there’s going to b an ep i’m going to finalize when i get there and it will be released on the 26th of the month i get there (as it is kinda a diss on a MAN who was 26 when we dated… i was a minor still.)
i’m also gonna make a family tree because i’m really bored (and i also kinda js wanna see all my siblings yk? im gonna draw them all soon bc like AUGH AJAJDKDJ I MISS THEM!!!)
omgz i’m so excited dude!!
(appreciation below!!)
also i saw billie eilish in my dream last night. one of the funniest and sweetest people i know 😭 SHARK WAS ALSO IN THAT DREAM HES SO SWEET ‼️‼️ god i wish i could hug them today, just right now. yall don’t understand how much billie and finneas have been through together, and im so proud of how far they made it. i love you both, and although you won’t see this post in this reality, i know you will when we r together :DDD u guys make me so happy, so inspired, and just a better person overall. also huge thank you to billie in helping me with directing my music videos and being featured in one of my favorite songs — ripple effect. thank you finneas for just 😭 for keeping her alive, giving her a passion, and being so protective and supportive of her.
i’m so excited to b friends w both of them n js talk to them daily — it’s so fun.
i’m also super duper excited to meet one of my closest friends — nile — in person finally!!!! it’s been like 3 years of shifting together, and i know she’s excited too. i know she’s reading this, btw so i love u sm nile and thank u for being such a great and perfect friend throughout this whole journey. i truly don’t think i would still be kicking without you. i owe you the world, and i know you’re going to be blessed with many MANY things in the coming months, and the years following will be some of your best, but that’s only a taste of what is truly to come.
i’m so proud of you, and i’m also so round of everyone that has been clinging onto shifting even though it hurts. i’m always here for you. i love you all so so much. i want the best for you, and i know you’re going to get it. i’m always here to help in ANY way i can. ask me anything, i promise you i will answer with the wisdom God and the universe has given me!!
i cannot express my gratitude to my father, loki, enough. i don’t know how to even put it into words. he’s been there at my hardest, he’s been there at my best. i don’t think i would actually even be this far without him either. he’s one of the silliest and sweetest people ive ever met. i can’t believe he’s my FATHER you guys!! ITS SO COOL AUGHH
i also have so many people here i need to thank, there’s more that i can think of right now but just know i love and appreciate every one of you guys.
staring with @smellofemale!! you were such a sign when i met you. i don’t think i’ve met a christian shifter — you’re the only one i still talk to if i have! im just so so sooo blessed to have met you. i don’t know what to say, dude! i love you so much. you’re so sweet, so kind, and so inspiring. i love you!
@eneablack although you’re one of my newest friends, you’re another really really inspirational one. you’re so open about your struggles with shifting, even though you’ve had success time and time again. it shows me and many others how shifting sometimes is a hard thing to get used too, even with successes under your belt!
@daisys-reality! if you don’t know them, FOLLOW IMMEDIATELY PLEASE OMGGJAJSN she gives some of the best and most accurate readings i could ever ask for. also her drs (specifically her mermaid one) have inspired me so much!!
@kanachaka UR AO COOL BRO I JS LOVE SEEING UR POSTS AJSJDKDJD
@kazylynn i love u sm!! u rlly show me i can be an inspiration to others, and that’s something i’ve hoped for all my life. i want to be a good, helpful person — and i love you for showing me i can be.
@babybearthepsychic a few months ago you gave me a free reading that was just so accurate and so real. i don’t know if i would still be on this spiritual journey without it, because i was at one of my hardest points then. i cannot believe how just truly accurate and kind you are. i love you so much, you’re doing amazing. i wish i could give you the biggest hug, and i could donate like a million dollars to u rn but i literally don’t have a job 😭
@zipperrants i don’t think i rlly need to explain this… dude i thought u we’re so cool even when u we’re js interacting with @maddies-chronicles and i rlly wanted to interact w u so bad but i was so so scared bro!! and thank u hale for giving me the opportunity to meet them!!
@accidentalshifter YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW MANY PEOPLE U REPRESENT IN THIS RESLITY — YOURE ONE OF THE FIRSR ADULT SHIFTERS I SAW ON HERR AND IM SO SO SO SO SOOO FUCKING HQPPY YOURE SO OPEN ABOUT IT! you’re just so free and it’s beautiful. i love you so much
and there are so many more but i just.. im gonna cry i love you all tooo much.. please know u all mean so much to me and i can’t wait to tell u so many stories when i get back, and help u guys shift. i am working so hard to post more, and i pray this post can help me become more active.
so so so much love, to everyone in this community, you’re so wonderful. may the gods bless you.
so much love, peace and joy
the abyss
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dmsr-art · 3 months
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Omg the Kiriona/Alecto 🤩 I'm in love!
Harrow/Alecto is also so massively underrated. I'm always afraid to talk about that one but I need that tiny gal getting her shit rocked by a tall scary woman immediately
Just the pairing of "me and the tall dead corpse I hallucinate about" is one heck of a messed up dynamic /positive
halecto is so good!! omg im surprised ur afraid to talk about it... it's monster wife yuri ppl love that shit. they're not second cousins you'll be fine 🤧
i have an old sketch of them I've been eyeing forever to clean up and color, thank u for reminding me of it!! this makes me want to work on it :3
btw have u read this fic? it popped into my head while answering this ask, it's so HOT AND RAW
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weird-bookworm · 6 months
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LET'S SPREAD SOME LOVE!!!!!
talk about your favourite mutuals and why you like them
😄
oh god this is gonna be one hell of an answer
@fairyhaos because shes the sweetest comfiest most adorably chaotic lil ball of energy + she gives the best advice like hello??? what are you??? oh god my heart goes a little off track everytime we talk i just love you so much
@wheeboo okay shes part 2 of the they-make-me-feel-the-safest trio along w yena and axe like please i stumbled across the sweetest sassiest boo stan ever ALSO UR GORGEOUS???
@blue-jisungs axeaxeaxeaxeaxe so chaotically lovely and so boomer and so fun and yoid think shes savage but no shes just soft and as harmful as a pinecone (why do u remind me of tht one joon meme of him just. sitting there. peeling potatoes. in tiny.)
@slytherinshua we kinda talked less for a while bc life happened and then caught up (kinda lol) and im so glad to see shes still as crazy and lovable as ever (im waiting for tht ppt) like talk abt impressive. impressive is her whole personality. sometimes in, uh, less than conventional ways...hehe
@eternalgyu HANNIE WHERE TF R U I MISS UUUUUUUU 😭😭😭😭🫶🏻 like yk what i imagine when i think of hannie? causing mischief. LIKE IDEK WHY OKAY i just feel like we'd be running around giggling like idiots js pulling random pranks on people and js the thought makes me smile
@yllouhannie ylli is like love. ylli is gentle and kind and sweet. shes understanding and passionate and really quite cute. oh my love you make me wanna jump off a cliff because how can someone like you exist 😭 (no srsly what is this witchcraft ilysm mwah)
@woozvc nora is like home. which is saying a lot lmao i sound dramatic but like yk when u just talk to someone and it feels just right even tho ur not rly doing much? shes older but she lets go and i can just feel how absolutely beautiful this person is *melts off a cliff*
@welcometomyoasis shu oh shu i have no words so pardon if this is a little small but. ik i say this a lot but i rly do mean it. i love you. so much. yr msgs and reblogs and asks always make a smile and they make me giddy and suddenly nothing is wrong with the world 🥺
@haecien bro is my ultimate gay bestie like what else do you need in life other than cien. what. nothing is the answer. life is complete when u hv cien and his shenanigans lolol like i dare you try to Not like him. i m p o s s i b l e.
@glosskirt AYYYYY MY ARMY SOULMATE we connected over min yoongi. we still rant over min yoongi. we shall die talking about min yoongi. like there is nothing better than having someone to fangirl with over my favs gloss you filled a hole in my life <3
@mesanthropi weiwei!!!! my little bundle of sugar spice and everything nice!! (+ chaos and a passion about the randomest shit ever how do u live why am i not this exciting) how is it always fun to talk to you and why do ur msgs excite me so much
@aaniag chaos. thats it. chaos. this woman brought with her about half a dozen more desi moots for me like how do i hug you how do i appreciate you enough i ugghhhh 😩
@thepoopdokyeomtouched im still waiting for my flirting yk? lol on a serious note, u and ur crazy streak r probably the most entertaining thing on here, and i fucking love it. i love ur chaos and the fact tht u choose to share it w me, thank you 🫶🏻
@arafilez bro rly dropped outta thin air like a fucking ghost and made my life abt a 100x more exciting where were you my entire life ara. where. why didnt the atz rants and the writing and the random asks show up sooner. why.
@nonononranghaee HAFS MY LIL CUTIE PATOOTIE WHY DO I ALWAYS WANNA SQUISH U NOMNOM U CRUSH U KSKSJEHEH u give me so much cuteness aggression oh my god...
@kkooongie sarah sarah sarah sarah sarah i live for ur writing and im always looking forward to our little chats abt books and random stuff (...when r u updating btw 😅)
@maeleelee @mxnsxngie @imagine-a-life-like-this i don't tell you guys enough how much i love and appreciate each one of you. i dont tell u enough how grateful i am whenever i think abt u bc god ik how hard it is to take in a random person in ur circle, to adjust w a kid, to make said kid feel safe and included and loved. so thank you. for all that you do for me and for loving lil ol' me <3
@cadenonlinelive where u at damn i hvnt seen u in ages
@rubywonu @idubiluv GUYS STOP HIBERNATING ITS NOT WINTER ANYMORE I MISS U
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desire-mona · 4 months
Note
Opinions on jacksfilms v sssniperwolf?
Penny for ur thoughts plz 🪙 (<- pretend that is a penny shhhhh)
this ask is an equivalent to asking for my hand in marriage just btw.
so in case anyone doesnt know anything abt this old ass drama (i dont know as much as i could either, this is a retelling from the bits and pieces i remember):
so basically sssniperwolf used to be this gaming youtuber but she eventually turned into a half baked "reaction" channel where she just watches tiktoks, makes low effort surface level commentary, and then doesnt credit the creator of said tiktoks. jacksfilms is a comedy youtuber who does a bunch of stuff (sketches, streaming, something called YIAY where he gives ppl prompts / questions to answer n reads em out(with credit!(also hes been doing stuff with ai recently but mostly to show how mid it is which like. eh idk how i feel abt it but its not a dealbreaker))) and he at one point in 2023 called out sniper for her content stealking and lazy content.
he started doing this thing where he reacted to her videos the way she reacts to the videos she steals? i think? and then he gives credit to the creators that sniper reacts to i hope ur following. sniper eventually got mad and was like "uhhhmmm ur stealing from me....." which is rly funny considering she steals from SO many ppl. they had lowkey beef for a while (and obv jack was in the right the entire time) and on uhhhhhh lemme look this up hold on. october 13th of last year sniper posted an instagram story poll like "jacksfilms is close to this place im shooting at should i go see him" i guess to like? talk things out?
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and then some amnt of time later while jack was playing jackbox on stream with his editors and stuff (dubbed the council) sniper showed up at his house, stood outside, and posted a video OF HIS HOME ON HER STORY. ON HER INSTAGRAM WITH OVER 5 MILLION FOLLOWERS. also to add even more context that i found out from youtube comments, sniper has been arrested for armed robbery before, so! some council member alerted jack and erin (jack's wife) was like "erm im gonna go outside" and everyone was like NO DONT OMG. eventually she deleted the story but by that point it was like wayyyy too late. and photos of his house were alr on twitter and stuff. the most ridiculous part is that when jack was rightfully like WHAG GHE HELL she was like this guy is creepy and hes been harassing me! i just wanna talk!!!
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jacksfilms made a video being like heyyyyy youtube can u do smthn abt this???? youtube, of course, did nothing in response. i honestly dont know how it ended but snipers still doing her thing and so is jack so ultimately nothing substantial came of it, i guess. i wasnt on stream when it happened but i was GLUED to twitter as it was unfolding since ive been a big jacksfilms fan since i was 12ish. crazy times
WAIT EDIT I FORGOT TO ADD MY OPINION OOPS LOL: FUCK SNIPERWOLF
also fun fact! ive had a couple convos with a council member (marshaldoesstuff u will always be famous) and i was in his discord FOREVER ago. like 2018 forever ago. got groomed in that server it was kinda goofy (NOT marshal's fault - nor the mods of said server, im still friends with a few of those mods and they were always so protective of me and were there to put a stop to everything, i love them dearly.) so yeah im kinda etched into jacksfilms lore in a way that VERY few remember. which is the case for a few different fandoms tbh.
second fun fact: jack and erin r house md fans (erin has a crush on house and jack has a crush on cuddy which is sooo based of them)
thank u for asking and thank u for reading :3 i luv jacksfilms
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prince-liest · 7 months
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Your last 666 series installment is the best thing that happened to me. Its full of gore, somehow fluffy and wait-.. do I finally see some FRICKING COMUNICATION between the two idiots!?!?!
Ngl, Vox's 'Alastor not being able to love' statement hurt my soul. Your writing is brilliant and and let's just see what ending ya wro-..O MA LORD IS THAT VAL'S LOVE POTION!?!?!?!?
Now I need to know what's next!!!! And VOX I SWEAR IF U USE THIS SITUATION IN ANY WAY IM GOING TO SKIN YOU ALIVE.
This series is a blast♡ love it!♡ makes me weirdly passionate and excited hah!
Some communication, and some communication failure, hahaha. They're going to be talking a lot more in the next one, actually, because I meant to write some NSFW and they had to go and attempt a healthy conversation instead. What can you do.
Thank you so much, I'm delighted that you're enjoying! :D
And: Way more anon asks about the latest 666 getting answered under the cut! <3 I combined a bunch from the last couple of days.
prince, I'm going insane over the latest fic. so we know from Alastor's inner monologue that he knows the roofie was an accident, but considering the super stressful situation, the fact that Vox was the one to ask for a kiss and the fact that Alastor accused him of wanting instead of loving him not a few minutes ago…. makes me wonder if Vox might not be at least a little worred that Alastor might think it was on purpose <3 gonna be rotating this in my head for the foreseeable future - ✨
I am so glad that these things are on y'all's minds, hahaha. Because you can bet they are on mine. >:D And THANK YOU, very pleased to be dragging everyone down into insanity with me.
“Should I stitch together the scars your teeth left in me in a mirror of my own signature on your body.” Fucking. POETRY. 🐈‍⬛
I am always so happy when I write shit like this and instead of everyone pointing at me and going, "Look, what an EDGELORD!" the response is you people being VERY nice and leaning into the feelsy fun! 💛
holy moly ??? i love the new 666 addition aaaah 😭🙏 the trials and tribulations of feeling scorned and ghosted by a loser who confessed his love to you and the next time you see him he’s holding your LITERAL heart in his hands by alastor ! OMFG this was too good esp the part where vox is like “bro why do YOU CARE ?? i thought you didn’t love me huh?” and alastor is like well. maybe i.do. 😐 LIKE CMONN this really played out like some soap drama and i loved the neat details on resuscitative thoroctomy (learned a new word too so double bonus) the fact vel was on the line w her and val’s apparent surgeon for val’a little ‘incidents ??? GOLDEN I SAYY hope we see more of ur oc … 🫣🫣 btw ofc vox would love to an end an argument with a kiss OF FUCKING COURSE HE WOULD 😭 thank u sm for this chapter princeliest my dear <3 hope life is treating u well too !! -🦌
Vox is ahead of Alastor in terms of effective in-the-moment conflict resolution, but goddamn if he isn't fucked up in his own fun little ways. They're so not done with most of these issues, but at least they're on they're way to maybe be able to have a real conversation about them!
You know. If they chose to do that kind thing. Instead of whatever they will probably do instead.
Anyway, THANK YOU!! I had a great deal of fun writing this chapter and digging into some of the issues that have been slowly collecting underneath the surface of kinky radiostatic, so I'm happy you guys are enjoying as well!! :D
AS FOR MY OC... I WILL POST ABOUT THEM SOON. I LOVE THEM A LOT AND IT EXCITES ME THAT PEOPLE WANT TO KNOW MORE OF THEM. Tysm for asking Q^Q
Just read the new addition to the 666 verse, and inside of me are two wolves: The first is saying: Immaculate, artistry of the highest form. We finally get Alastor’s own confrontation with his vulnerability and him trying to figure out what exactly the relationship with Vox means to him. Cannot wait for how this all is going to develop. The other part of me: THE BREADCRUMBS WORKED THE MUSE IS WRITING!!! Followed by this image (since tumblr won’t let me attach it while being anonymous) https://i.redd.it/hx2shk642vs71.jpg -🕊️
LMAO THAT PIC. Amazing, flawless, thank you. The breadcrumbs DEFINITELY worked, please keep feeding. Digging into Alastor's shit is bringing me life and I'm happy to share it, hahaha. We're swinging even harder on the introspection in the next one!
As a sucker for medical gore and aroace angst, I lack the words to express my love and appreciation for your most recent installment of 666, but your writing of radiostatic's dynamic was captivating and proved to be such a lovely read as always! I loved that you touched on Alastor's relationships with the women around him as that has always been such an interesting aspect of his character to me! I never really put much thought into how Vox's apparent avoidance of Alastor in the show could mirror Alastor's disappearance, and now it will Not leave my mind. My heart hurts for these two dorks, super looking forward to chapter 2!
"Medical gore and aroace angst" should be the title of my memoir. Honestly, this series has ended up a lot more edgy-bloody than I expected it to, since I usually tend to prefer to portray my whump/angst/violence/etc in a much more roundabout way, but it's actually kinda tipped over into, like... part of the point is how banal it is, how beside the point. The upsetting heavy-hitting bits aren't the blood, they're everything else that goes on around it. Anyway, thank you so much! <3 I think your heart will find some relief in chapter two, haha, I hope you enjoy!!
Meanwhile alastor, completely convinced that there’s no situation where vox actually loves him and is happy with the way things are—either vox wants more and is going to start asking for more, or he doesn’t actually love him and just wants to have sex with him and thus either way he is a Liar. They’re so fucking bad at this. No one is capable of being the adult here. I think they need an auspitice.
It's really funny that you said that, because that is kind of exactly the role that [spoiler] ends up playing, though in a more roundabout way, hahaha. They certainly need someone to, like, get them to be having the same conversation with each other instead of two parallel ones. I think the fun thing about writing Alastor reacting to his own feelings is just how much his reaction can change based on how things are framed for him, and it leaves a lot of wiggle room for how differently I've ended up writing him reacting to the season 1 finale in 666 vs in Happily Ever After, and Other Shit Nepotism Can't Buy.
But, god, you really nailed the description of what Alastor is feeling. <3
Vox in the latest 666, my ENTIRE HEART. Literally nothing about how he read the situation was a bad take or a leap to conclusions, but alastor constantly says the opposite of what he means and refuses to admit vulnerability or friendship and what the hell else was vox meant to do with that, of course he backed off, they need to have this talk so badly
YES, PRECISELY! Like, I hope it came through that really neither of them was completely crazy to react the way they did! It's a result of how much of their communication has been nonverbal, implied, and talking around things - they'd been doing so well up until this point, but there's only so far that can take you before you start thinking that you're on the same page when really you're reading two completely different books! Thank you sm! <3
‘But I am capable,” Alastor says gently. “I love you very much.” Vox gapes up at him. “...I. Fuck you.” His voice is tight, strained. “I don’t fucking believe you.” Alastor feels his smile thin. “Well. That’s just dandy, then, isn’t it?”’ I AM NOT OK GOING FUCKING FERAL
Probably one of my favorite lines to write, ehehehe. THANK YOU ANONNNN <3 It's kinda interesting to see how differently some people read this. Some folks thought Alastor was saying it to hurt Vox (which is how Vox read it). Some folks thought it was true (how Alastor intended it). Some folks thought Alastor was trying to fit into the mold that he thought Vox wanted from him (how I intended it). All of them make sense as readings! >:)
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1eoness · 1 year
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hi! could i request something fluffy? maybe leon spoiling reader with some meal, or cuddles? thanks! ❤️
mentioning meals I AM THE REMINDER TO GO GET A SNACK AND REJUVENATE
and yes ofc i love writing fluffy fluffy hehehehe (im kind of uncreative rn so sorry). btw i'm writing this in the same format as the other one but if you want it to be more structured and narrative just uh tell me LOL
content : fluffy leon kennedy x gender neutral!reader (it's written in second person though). pet names lol
synopsis : leon wants to spoil you so he's feeding you and providing you with an army's ware of cuddles >:)
-food is fuel and leon is a fucking engine
-tbh i hc that leon has a big appetite for sweet stuff,,,, i'm sure a big collective of ppl agree bc he's so squishy squishy [what the fuck am i saying idk]
-anyway enough about me gushing on leon.
-YOU. when will you ever take the time to let him spoil you? are you trying to avoid him?:((
-leon is part kidding. he's not mad ofc but sometimes he can't help but get a tiny bit worried about you sometimes.
-see, leon is a firm believer that a person cannot come to their best senses unless their basic/psychological needs are fulfilled. that includes things like eating, or affection—because when your body senses that you're lacking in something, it will use your brain power to signal you that you need to eat or be smothered with affection! hence you can end up feeling burnt out if u dont pay attention to ur love vitals!! >:(
-leon's mindset will always be applied on you because you're his second heart, you're his tough rock and you need to be taken care of!!
-HE KNOWS WHAT YOU'RE THINKING "affection? that's absurd people can still learn attentively and work efficiently without having to be coddled >:(" while yes in a sense its true—but sometimes you just don't realize that what you need is some time to be vulnerable and intimate, which can explain why your emotions feel a lot more heightened recently than usual (which he notices by the way). you've been tense for a while, and leon reasons that you can't just 'move on' from being overwhelmed with work stress and whatnot—you have to relieve it! but enough about theory.
-your hunger for food or affection is like a 7th sense to leon to be honest. while it's not an accurate intuition everytime, he's bound to think of you once every like two minutes.
-leon actually has very clear and high critical thinking skills. this means he is able to remember a lot of things about you even if he only notices them or you mention it once: this includes your comfort drink, where you like to be touched, hell maybe even the MBTI of your favorite character. and he ESPECIALLY knows what food you like. pad thai, sushi, oxtail, jerk chicken, cake, boba, YOU NAME IT HE KNOWS IF YOU LOVE IT OR NOT
-so when it actually came to asking you what you wanted, he'd send a text saying he's downtown and asking you 'what would you like, baby?'. he's careful with his words and doesn't say "do you want me to get you something on the way?" because it means he's giving you a choice >:( when the whole point is to spoil you because you deserve it.
-and if you answer with something vague like 'anything' HE DOESN'T MAKE YOU SPEAK FURTHER he'll just buy what he knows u like and keep the rest in the fridge if you dont wanna eat it :3 well that's what they're for, right?
"oh, my sweet.." his voice was quaint at the sight of you. leon tried his best to be silent when he entered the room, not wanting to sound like he was pitying you, but seeing you half-covered with comforters, mildly upset and your mind in a frazzle has his heart dropping a bit. you were probably thinking about so many things: meeting some deadlines, picking up this and that from the store, computing this... but you just couldn't organize your thoughts. but that's why leon was here.
your head moved to swivel his direction. "leon.." you smile at him weakly.
it was cold in the city tonight. leon places a hefty white plastic bag of your favorite on the nearby surface before he sits down in front of you from the edge of your bed. he takes the brief second of studying his lover's face before he pulls you into a comforting and warm hug. he can't help but pat the back of his sweet baby's head down, and you feel his lips barely nuzzle onto your ear as he mutters. "y're so good to me, baby. you know that?" leon reminds you before kissing the side of your head shortly. you tried to reciprocate it by giving him a nimble kiss on his cheek, which he gratefully accepts with an eager beam on his lips.
his hands slide down your arms in a soft stroke as he lets go of you gently. the rustling of the bed's layers being heard as leon moves a bit to reach for the hefty boxes of food, which he opens for you once he gives you take your utensil/s. leon's happy seeing you eat. it's a form of reassurance to him personally witnessing you getting the fill you deserve after a whole few days of being so busy and rushing everywhere. it's a calming sense to him as you both soak in comfortable silence while he watches you eat. he was caring less that it's 2 in the morning and caring more about the way the color on your face slowly vibrates back onto your features. you seem less tired, just by a tad percentage. it makes him smile to himself knowing he was able to take care of you. " 'm finished." you mumbled with a hum, feeling a little full and having to lie down. fullness makes you sleepy (and leon knows that!) so he has a subtle, cheeky little grin as he leans over and collects your legs with one arm, pulling you to make you lie on your back. he crawls over to lie down next to you, once again pulling you close to him while he wraps his arms around you— one patting and planted gently on your back while the other cradles your head close to his heart. just where you belong... "you tired, baby?" leon asked shortly and your little nod sufficed. his cheek gently rests against the side of the crown of your head. his touch is soft, it's sweet as he rubs and scratches down your back gently. he gently scruffles at your scalp with his other hand's fingertips, and the motions will send you to a hopefully revitalizing sleep ♡. he places a kiss on the top of your head, like a ribbon keeping its gift from falling apart :( he knows at this moment maybe you're thinking you don't deserve him. but that's so far from the truth.
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nightcolorz · 1 year
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Hello, could you elaborate on your thoughts about how sex was treated in the show? If you are comfortable with it, obviously! I love your blog and your answers btw
Of course! I love answering these asks. For me this is more of a nitpick then a criticism, bcus I don’t think there’s anything technically worse about how the show handles sex over the books, but it just doesn’t appeal as much to my preferences.
In the books sex is very interesting bcus of how encoded it is into the narrative. Sexual desire is thematically extremely important in tvc, it informs basically every character dynamic. Sex isn’t something the vampires literally can do, but they are very sexual in nature, or “sensual”as Anne Rice loves to say, and their actions and dynamics r very psycho-sexually motivated. I think this makes for a very unique dynamic that the narrative has with sex. Tvc vampires can’t have sex but almost every form of pleasure they experience from killing to looking at art is felt as strongly as sexual pleasure, they have intimate relationships with each other that transcend human romance, almost every two characters have sexual impulses over each other. It’s weird and fucked up and interesting and there’s a lot going on there. Sex is symbolically the same as blood drinking and killing and hunting r sexual, and I love that bcus it gives the vampires this element of other that’s really compelling. I love the concept that their ways of feeling and experiencing human pleasures and emotions and relationships we’re familiar with r fundamentally changed in a way that r almost beyond our understanding bcus of vampirism. They r very alien but also very human, bcus at their core they just experience things the way we do but heightened to a freakish extreme. I like to think that tvc vampires experience a reality were the type of frenzied daze we experience when horny is what they experience nearly all the time. It’s so weird! And yeah, cool. The way romance works bcus of this is so interesting too, bcus an element of romance and sex comes with pretty much every vampire dynamic, and it creates these crazy fucked up dynamics that u wouldn’t get in any other book series.
and then well, there’s the show. Not much to say there is the problem. I don’t really have an issue with the vampires being able to have literal sex, but it’s the way sex and sexual subtext in general r handled that bothers me. Bcus..I mean it’s boring. Like, Louis and Lestat have crazy hate sex, but it’s not anything we haven’t seen before in television, minus how they’re an interracial couple and two men I suppose. Sex has the same implications as it does for humans, like the whole Antoinette cheating story line is just ur average cheating storyline but with blood and violence, you’d never get something that mundane and clean cut in the books. And like, I love some weird gay vampire sex scenes as much as the next guy, but how does floating vampire sex compare to the weirdness I rambled about above? There’s not that layer of complexity and strangeness I find so interesting. Like, it’s fantastical and vampire specific, they drink each others blood and float and stuff, but not in the dense way it is in the books. I believe that this has the potential to change, I think the tense scenes with Rashid, like the honey and pineapple scene, felt weird and bizarre in a way that reminded me of the books. But, I’ve been disappointed before. So for now I’m dissatisfied.
thanks for sending me the ask and thank you sm!!! You r so sweet <3 I love that u love my blog. As always feel free to send me asks guys I love them !
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sinswithpleasure · 2 days
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hey, sorry u gotta deal w the weird/dumb asks, sometimes when I read asks that authors answer to, they make me wonder if they're the same person or if ppl r just tolling. hope these ppl are able to find some creativity or ability to put their thoughts into words better soon. :/
anyways, karina looked so good at the milan fashion week. couldn't help but think about bodyguard!reader au w her. like imagine trying to keep ur eyes on the crowd around her instead of at her. karina always teases you about catching you trying to sneakily try to catch a glimpse/check her out no matter how many times you claim it's to make sure nothing is on her or it's because "that guy's hand was getting a little too close to her ass" or something.
man, imagine becoming like her personal bodyguard or being requested to work with her closely more often because she's thinks you're funny and/or good eye candy esp when she's tired of being surrounded by creepy ugly ass old men all the time.
random fic idea: you're standing in front of her changing room behind the scenes or something after a fashion show because she asked the crew if she could try on some of the dresses and other clothes she thought were really cute during it. most of the people, are gone and the few people left were those that were cleaning and packing the last of the shit up. so when a muffled scream for your help comes behind the door, you rush in thinking that someone may have snuck in somehow and waited to prey on her. however, all you find is karina practically naked and you instantly turn around beet red, stuttering out many apologies. all you hear is the clack of heels getting closer to you and no reply, but then you feel her chest press up against your back. she's giving you a backhug and feeling you all up. "k-k ka-arina-ssi, what are you doing?" "yah, i told you so many times already to call me jimin noona when we're not in front of the public, you don't have to be so formal and professional, you know?" (noona bc im younger than her and there isn't enough younger male reader fics out there. fuck, i love women older than me and like, there's just smth abt calling a older woman noona that's just so fucking hawt)
akjsdhfajs sorry if my grammar is shitty and if there's run on sentences lmao head empty,,, only karina. man, i can't stop thinking abt how pretty she would look while you fuck her pussy raw from behind. in front of a mirror with her pretty back all arched and big tits jiggling from each loud thrust against her soft supple ass cheeks.
could i be 🦈anon if you're accepting anons and if it's not already taken? :3 hope u have a great day/night btw!
Hi 🦈 anon!
Are you a psychic? It's not bodyguard, but you're sooooooo close....
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I think it's so her to use her body ever so slightly to tease the guy she thinks is cute—if she already has a revealing dress, you know she'd go ahead and just bend over slightly so her poor target has nowhere else to look but at her chest.
God, she'd let all that tension simmer until she can get her man alone with her in a changing room, and whew, it'd be hard to keep quiet from there 🫣.
Doing her in front of a mirror would kill me, by the way. You're sooooo brilliant with that image.
Thanks for the ask <3
Sins.
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forlix · 5 months
Note
HELLAUURRR!!!
You're literally the best writer on tumblr, so I'm here to ask for some advice 🥹
So you know how stories have a timeline and some may cover like two years for example but be only around 2k words. HOW TO DO THATT??!? 😭 I always get stuck in time when I write something. If there is monday then there has to be tuesday and I just can't do a smooth slide to let's say the next week of the story. I really can't figure out how to do smooth time skips. So perhaps you have some tips? 😋💖
Waah my English isn't good so idk if you get what I mean. It's alright if you don't want to answer!! ^^
hiii my love!
firstly, u flatter me hello. best writer on tumblr is complete craziness!!! thank u so much for saying that though, you're very kind :') and i'm honored that you're entrusting this question to me!
secondly, this is all sooooo valid. navigating time is one of my biggest writing challenges among MANY so i'm not really sure i have the solution myself, but i can try to walk you through my process if you think that would help. i'm sorry in advance if it comes across as convoluted as i think it does 😭
instead of chronological, day-to-day accounts, i like to think of my fics as collections of important moments. "important" meaning significant for characterization, relationship progression, worldbuilding, etc. these moments don't usually happen back-to-back, because all change takes time.
if i can reference my own "ace," which i took special care to map out the timing for, about a week passes between every scene for most of the fic. i made it this way because i wanted there to be a lot of implicit development during those weeks; the couple needed to make their transition from acquaintances to lovers in a way that felt natural. but of course the development couldn't all be implicit, so the fic ends up being a collection of important moments that gives the reader just enough information to tag along on their journey. which is why u get scenes like mc taping hyun's hand in the training room, mc running out of the arcade heartbroken, and mc and hyun having a heart-to-heart on the gym floor
you can think of it as planting the seeds in one scene, letting them sprout and blossom "off camera" (aka during the timeskip), and then doing a garden reveal in the following scene. the two scenes are still very much interconnected—they still depict the same people in the same universe in the same storyline—but something about them has changed, and with it the plot has progressed
depending on what kind of story you're writing, consecutive days makes total sense, btw. in "crying lightning," i explicitly point out the timeskips with headers containing new locations and times preceding every scene because it the couple is a stylist/idol pair that travels together often over one year. in "everything has changed," which is probably closest to ur example of 2 years spanning 2k words, two years pass between every scene to place byeol growing up in parallel with felix and mc falling in love. but maybe you're writing, say, a camp counselor au or a zombie apocalypse au, and the characters only have limited time together; the way you'd write about a five-day period would look super different from a six-year period, u get me?
i am SO sorry about how long this got holy fuck i am truly terrible at putting anything about my writing process into words 😭 but TL;DR: 1) think of ur fics as compilations of important moments, 2) ~plant the seeds of change~ in one scene and reveal the end results in the next, and 3) think ab what timeframe/time-related format would work best for ur fic and go from there! your english is perfect btw <3 don't hesitate to lmk if u have any other follow-up comments or questions!
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Text
Picture Imperfect pt 2
Prompts: hey this is a stupid ask but could u maybe make a fic about roman and virgil bonding and growing closer post pof and fwsa and all? could be platonic, pining and then romantic, whatever ud like. ik its not the best prompt but ive got them on the brain, ive re-listened to the reputation album and ur writing is just so good and if not, take care of urself! - anon
I absolutely love your Sanders Sides stories, I can always 'hear' the character's voices - if you get what I mean. If you ever feel motivated or are looking for suggestions, I'd love to see something more from "Picture Imperfect" - I know Roman implies that Imagination versions of the other Sides have escaped before, and I'd really love to see him/the other Sides dealing with something like that! Either way, thank you for all your hard work! <3 - anon
hey could u write a fic about like, ro and vee out on an outing (maybe a first or second date if it’s romantic) and it starts raining so ro expects virgil to get scared and go back inside, but he just starts laughing and dancing and having fun or whatever? and then suddenly they’re both having a blast in the rain (bonus points for the cheesiest fucking rain kiss ever-). no pressure btw, and i love ur work <3 especially how u portray prinxiety! - anon
Uhhh-hi-there-i-am-nervous babe I don’t know how to put this req here but it’s here I promise
Read on Ao3 Part 1
Warnings: none
Pairings: prinxiety
Word Count: 3521
  Virgil approaches him after everything is over and just pokes his arm. 
“Uh, hey, Princey?”
“Yes?”
“Can you—can you tell me how many times you’ve done that?”
Roman frowns. “Done what?”
“Well, the whole…’other versions of us,’ thing.”
Shame curdles anew in his chest and he takes a deep breath, swallowing it as best he can. “W-well, I can’t specify exactly how many times I ran that specific scenario, but…er, it’s a tad more complicated than that, actually.”
“I got time.”
“U-um, can we—can we do this somewhere more private?”
“You wanna go to your room?”
“Yeah—yes, actually, that would be a good idea. There’s something in there that will help.”
Virgil frowns but doesn’t press until they’ve moved up and out of the living room. Roman glances at the door and lets out a sigh when he sees it’s closed. Good. Little chance of anyone interrupting them from either side now. 
“Roman?”
He shakes himself. “Right. Sorry. So, um…can I ask why you’re asking, first of all? I-it’s not that I particularly mind answering, per se, it’s just that I…um…”
“You’ll be able to tailor your answer to my question if you understand the specifics of it?” He shrugs when Roman looks at him, surprised. “What? You and L really aren’t that different from each other, you know.”
“I know…”
Logan had said as much, taking him aside much like this and having the softest conversation about the importance of understanding why they’re each doing their own role when it comes to Roman’s ideas and the videos and everything, including saying something about how if he’s managed to stop Roman from wanting to create, he’s failed as a critiquer because he’s extinguished Roman’s creative drive. 
Roman may or may not have cried into his shoulder after that. 
“But really—running things over and over in your head just to show how much they could suck? Kinda my thing, Princey.”
“That’s what—oh, Virgil, I’m so sorry.”
“Eh.” He waves his hand. “Don’t worry about it. That’s my gig, I know how to do it in a way that’s healthy—okay maybe not entirely healthy,” he concedes when Roman gives him a look, “but it’s my thing. Maybe I’m wondering why you thought it had to be yours too.”
“I didn’t mean to steal your thunder, Virgil, I really didn’t—“
“Roman,” Virgil says, reaching out and taking his shoulders to make him look, “I’m not mad at you. I’m not gonna get mad at you. I’m worried, okay?”
Roman takes a deep breath. “Right. Sorry.”
“’S okay. Just take your time.”
In and out. We can do this.
“The Imagination is…temperamental,” he begins, “especially when it comes to all of us. Mostly because we’re a more…concrete part of Thomas’s Imagination seeing as we…sort of become real but not exactly?”
“Okay, I’m with you so far.”
“But because the Imagination likes to go in the direction of what could be, it…sometimes spits out other versions of us.”
Virgil blinks. “What, like clones?”
“Sort of? It’s more—it’s more like it makes alternate versions of us that lean slightly more into different—oh, goodness—character interpretations.” 
Virgil narrows his eyes. “You’re gonna have to be more specific, there, Princey.”
Roman scrubs a hand over his face. “One time there was a Patton who got out of the Imagination that was obsessed with basking specifically chocolate chip cookies.”
“How is that different from our Patton?”
“This one managed to use literally all of the flour and sugar we had before I was able to stop him.”
“Okay, yeah, that’s—that’s different. So they’re all just, like, slightly off?”
“It’s more like if someone took the sliders for their personalities from their video game characters and messed around with them?” Roman pinches the bridge of his nose. “Sorry, I’m not doing a very good job of explaining this.”
“No, no, I got it. That’s a good analogy.” Virgil glances at the door to the Imagination. “So—wait, is that where they come from?”
“They can come from any of the doors, they just mostly come through this one since it’s my side and not Remus’s and…um…”
Virgil raises an eye when Roman’s cheeks start to flush. 
“God, this is embarrassing.”
“I’m not here to make fun of you,” he reminds, “I’m just worried.”
“You have to promise you won’t tease me.”
“Okay, I promise.”
“Wait, really, just like that?”
“I’m only an asshole to you when it’s funny, Roman.”
“Your definition of ‘funny’ needs some work.”
“You need to stop dodging the question.”
“Fine, fine, okay, it’s just…” Roman takes a deep breath. This is mortifying. “…sometimes I would summon them, okay?”
“You’d summon other versions of us? What for?”
“To…to…” He twists his hands together. “To…comfort me.”
Silence. Yep, this was a mistake. This was the worst decision he could have made here and he wishes this were a not-real version of Virgil so he could just yell cut and have this experience not be actually happening. 
“…brace yourself, Princey, you’re getting a hug.”
“Wha—ah!”
Roman barely has time to finish asking the question before Virgil’s arms are wound tightly around him, his face buried in the crook of his neck as he tries to shove Roman into his chest. Roman just wraps his arms around him too, carefully twisting his fingers into the fabric of Virgil’s hoodie. 
“…um…”
“Nope.” Virgil tightens his grip as Roman makes to pull back. “You get hugs now. No buts about it.”
“Do I get to ask why?”
“Aside from the fact that you’ve just told me you didn’t feel like you could ask us for comfort so you had to summon other versions of us?”
Roman wisely keeps his mouth shut and just rests his chin on Virgil’s shoulder. Virgil makes a noise that sounds vaguely like that’s what I thought. 
“…sorry?”
“Ah, shit, Princey, no,” Virgil mumbles, pulling back and looking Roman in the face, “I’m not—I’m not mad at you, okay? I’m—okay, I’m a little mad at myself and everyone else, but mostly I’m just sad, okay?”
“Since when have you been so transparent about what you’re feeling?”
As soon as he says it, he bites his lip so hard he almost draws blood. 
“Shit, Roman, don’t do that.” Virgil taps his chin. “Leggo, come on. I’m just—you’re gonna make yourself bleed, let go—there, that’s better. I’m trying to be better about it, okay, that’s it.”
Roman just nods. Is…is he sure this isn’t some other version of Virgil? There’s the big door to the Imagination in the hallway, after all, maybe…
“It is really me, by the way, I can hear you thinking about it over there.”
“Wait, you can what?”
“Not literally, Princey,” Virgil says, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, “but thanks for telling me I’m right.”
Roman makes a face and goes to pull away when Virgil just chuckles and holds him tighter. 
“Okay, that was mean.”
“Yes, yes, it was.”
“Look, just—you can come to us, okay? You don’t have to make versions of us that you think will comfort you ‘cause we won’t.”
“You—you mean that?”
“You see J around anywhere?”
Roman glances around. Sure enough, there’s no Janus. “Alright. I’ll—I’ll try.”
Virgil smiles at him—not a smirk, not that weird half-smile thing he does when he’s trying not to laugh, but a real smile—and claps him on the shoulder. “That’s all we can ask for, Princey. And uh, let me know if you need help catching any rogue versions of us, okay?”
Roman just nods dumbly as Virgil waves and walks out of his room. 
He glances at the door to the Imagination, still firmly shut.
Huh. 
———
“Hey, Virgil?”
Virgil takes out a headphone. “What’s up, Princey?”
“Have you seen Remus anywhere?”
“He said he was spending the day with the Kraken brood.” Virgil frowns. “Why, something wrong?”
“Well, he told me he was doing that too and there’s currently a Remus on top of the fridge doing his best to replace the water in the ice maker with slime.”
“What the—oh. Oh, is this one of the—okay. Yeah, what d’you need?”
“I think he’s only going to respond to your tempest tongue and I can’t do that.”
“Yeah, yeah, I got you.”
Virgil tucks his phone into his pocket and sets his headphones on the bed as he follows Roman down to the kitchen. Sure enough, there’s a Remus perched on top of the fridge, cackling wildly with his hands full of what looks like a blended version of Slimer from Ghostbusters. 
“Remus,” Virgil calls, many-layered voice getting the little gremlin’s attention, “get down from there.”
Remus pouts somehow while still cackling and lobs a handful of goo at them. Roman quickly summons an umbrella and blocks it. 
“Remus,” Virgil warns, “don’t make me come up there.”
Remus just cackles louder.
“Alright, you asked for it.”
He closes his eyes and concentrates for a few seconds, growing two feet taller and reaching up to scoop Remus up like a feral raccoon. He screeches, goo still saying everywhere, as Roman quickly grabs Virgil’s shoulder and sinks them out to his room. Virgil blinks, adjusting to the quick change, and Roman waves at him frantically by the open door. 
“Chuck him in!”
“Don’t have to tell me twice!”
One gooey, cackling Remus later, Roman slams the door shut and lets out a sigh, reaching out to poof away the remaining slime. 
“Oh, that’s sick. Can you clean everything like that?”
“No, just the Imagination messes. Thanks for your help.”
“Eh, no problem. Used to have to do that when we were younger anyway.”
“…ah. I see.”
Virgil looks at him oddly when Roman suddenly appears to deflate, only to realize that Roman didn’t get to grow up with Remus. “Oh, hey, I didn’t mean—“
“No, no, it’s quite alright. We’re…well, I suppose we’re making up for lost time now. I certainly wouldn’t’ve known to just…” He makes a picking-up gesture with his arms. “How long have you been able to grow like that?”
“I think it’s a fight-or-flight thing.”
“Got it.”
There are a few moments of awkward silence. 
“Well, I should let you get back to…what were you doing?”
“Oh, I was watching this show on Netflix. It’s called My Name.”
“Wait, is that the one about the girl whose father gets killed in the first episode and then she goes on this whole journey to try and find who was responsible?”
“Yeah, ‘ve you heard of it?”
“I was going to try and watch it! What episode are you on?”
“Uh…episode two. I’m not that far into it yet. But there’s only, like, six episodes or something.”
“Would you—would you want to watch it with me? Not like together, together, but—like a book club sort of thing?”
Virgil is not going to helplessly smile at how cute Roman is when he’s all eager, he’s not. “Sure. That’d be fun.”
He is going to smile when Roman grins so wide it looks like his face must hurt. 
———
“Therapy isn’t enough,” Virgil announces as he strides into Roman’s room, “I need to be weird about that old man.”
Roman chuckles and looks up from where he is at his desk, typing away at his computer. “So you watched the next episode, huh?”
“Look, I don’t know why he insists on making everything as dramatic as possible, but he does and it works for him.”
“So this is about that scene where he just rips his shirt halfway open for no reason, huh?”
“For no reason? Excuse me?” Virgil flops on Roman’s bed. “It is his gay-given right to be that dramatic and it’s working for him.”
“Seems like it’s working for you too.”
“Don’t act like you’re above it, you spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about how the framing around him sitting in his office chair was poetic cinema.”
“Yes, because I’m a storyteller and I can appreciate the use of framing in film and television to contribute to said story.”
“Uh-huh. How’s the writing going over there?”
“Don’t talk to me or my Untitled Document (1) ever again.”
Virgil laughs, head lolling back against the pillows as Roman shakes his head in mock sternness. “He’s so gone for him.”
“Who is? The assistant for him or him for the dead guy?”
“Yes.”
“You’re correct and you should say it.” He squints at the screen. “Wait, what’s a gender-neutral term for parent?”
A pause, then the rustle of fabric. “I want you to repeat what you just said to yourself.”
Roman does. “I might be stupid.”
“‘Might be,’ he says.”
“Shut up.”
“What’s the word I’m looking for that is like the exact word I’m looking for?”
“Leave me alone.”
Another laugh from behind him as he continues trying to type. But the thought of actually having Virgil here to talk about something they’re both watching is a lot more tempting than working on this idea that isn’t even due for a few more weeks anyway. He chews on his lip for a second before saving his work and closing it down. He did have more than half of it completed, thank you very much.��
He turns around, seeing Virgil sprawled over his bed like it’s his own, scrolling on his phone, and just takes a moment to look. 
Virgil looks…happy. It’s a good look on him. 
“When you’re done staring at me, I got a post to show you.”
“What is it?”
“Slow-motion GIFs of that moment.”
“Move over, then.”
———
By this point, when Roman asks him for help with wrangling an escaped version of one of them, they can do it while having a conversation. 
“I followed one of the main blogs in the fandom yesterday,” Virgil says as he grabs two of a Janus’s arms. “They followed me back.”
“Oh, really?” Roman grabs two more and starts hauling him toward the Imagination, deftly knocking aside a swinging cane. “You got to mutual status that quickly?”
“They said they liked my meta posts. Gave you credit, of course—“
“As you should.”
“—but yeah, they seem cool. It’s weird, I know it’s not like actually having a celebrity you can interact with, but it’s like—“
“It’s like being relatively famous just by having them know you. Do you think they’re laughing at your silly little jokes every morning,” Roman teases as they get the squirming noodle to the door, “while they’re having breakfast?”
“Thank goodness, maybe they’ll spare me when the cops come to kill all of us.”
“Or a rival gang.”
They shove the weird version of Janus back into the Imagination and shake themselves off. Roman picks up a piece of paper and jots it down. 
“Is it just me,” Virgil mutters, “or are they getting…weirder?”
“This is the first real weird one you’ve seen.”
“That has some implications that I do not like.”
“Uh-huh.” Roman shudders. “Just you wait. They’ll get weirder.”
“Is it too late to back out of this?”
“No. I can stop asking you if you want.”
Virgil reaches out and knuckles Roman’s shoulder. “I’m kidding. I couldn’t leave you to deal with all of that on your own.”
Roman doesn’t look at him for a moment, fiddling with the fingers on one hand. “I dunno, it’s just…this is pretty much a direct result of me not being able to deal with my own problems by myself, so…I would understand if you wanted to stop having to deal with them.”
Virgil looks at him for a moment. Then, out of nowhere, he says: “you know, sometimes I struggle with feeling useful.”
Roman whips his head around. “What?”
“Well, you guys come up with ideas, I’m only here to…point out the problems. Not that I’m not saying that’s not useful, but like…I gotta wait until you do all your work before I can even think about doing mine, do you get what I mean?”
“I believe so…Virgil, you—“
“So when you ask me for help with this,” Virgil says, speaking smoothly over him, “it makes me feel useful. This…this helps me too.”
Roman stops, staring at him in something that’s almost wonder. “It does?”
“Yeah, Princey. We—we’re all damaged in some way. We just gotta find someone else whose damage is compatible with ours.”
Roman blinks a few times as a slow smile spreads across his face. “Why, Virgil. That was almost poetic.”
“Shut up.”
“No, really, I’d love to see what you could write—“
“Shut up!”
———
“Hey, Roman?”
Roman looks up from his desk. “What’s up?”
Virgil shifts his weight from side to side. “Can we—this is a stupid question.”
“I’ve adjusted my expectations accordingly.” He shuts his laptop and turns to face him. “What can I do for you?”
“Can…can we go into the Imagination?” When Roman pauses for a moment, he quickly keeps going. “It’s just—I know I see it a bit when we throw the others back in and there’s not really a big difference and it’s all what you make of it but I just—you know what? Never mind. This was stupid.”
“No, no—“ Roman quickly stands up to catch Virgil’s elbow as he turns to leave— “no, Virgil, it’s not stupid. I’d love to take you to the Imagination.”
“You…you would?”
“Yeah. Do you wanna go now?”
“Aren’t you busy?”
“Mindlessly scrolling, that’s it. Come on,” he coaxes, leading Virgil back toward the door, “it’ll be fun.”
Virgil keeps watching him warily until Roman manages to get them through the door. He closes it firmly behind them as Virgil stares around at the field they find themselves in, littered with wildflowers and grassy hills as it stretches out almost endlessly in front of them. 
“…whoa.”
“Do you like it?”
“Princey, this is…this is fucking pretty.”
Unbelievably, Roman feels himself start to blush. “You like it?”
“Fuck—yeah, Roman. This is—how do you not spend all of your time here?”
“Well, it gets a little boring just staring at fields of flowers forever, and sometimes—“
As if on cue, a massive bank of thunderclouds rolls in overhead and it begins to rain. 
“Sometimes it does that,” Roman sighs, already turning back to the Imagination door, “I’m sorry, I really can’t predict those, they just happen sometimes. Come on, you can borrow something dry, I don’t…”
He trails off when he notices Virgil’s not next to him. He looks back. 
Virgil stands in the middle of the flowers, his head tilted back toward the sky. The purple-black of his hoodie almost perfectly matches the purple-black of the clouds. His eyes close, feeling the rain on his face, hands slightly outstretched as if to welcome it. He looks—he looks—he—
Oh. 
Oh. 
“Virgil?”
“Yeah?”
“Can I—can I kiss you?”
Virgil looks at him and chuckles. “Getting real cliché, huh, Princey? Was this your plan?”
“N-no, not necessarily, I—wait, what? You’re not surprised?”
“I’m kinda surprised you asked first, but you are Romance.”
“You—you—“ Roman blinks. “Wait, you want to kiss me too?”
Virgil just grins and walks up to him. 
“Hi,” he murmurs as he kisses Roman, both of their eyes fluttering shut as the rain pours over them. 
Roman doesn’t need to worry about this not being the real Virgil. He’d never be capable of Imagining something as incredible as this. 
General Taglist: @frxgprince@potereregina@gattonero17@iamhereforthegayshit@thefingergunsgirl@awkwardandanxiousfander@creative-lampd-liberties@djpurple3@winterswrandomness@sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes@iminyourfandom@bullet-tothefeels@full-of-roman-angst-trash  @ask-elsalvador @ramdomthingsfrommymind@demoniccheese83@pattonsandershugs @el-does-photography @princeanxious@firefinch-ember@fandomssaremysoul@im-an-anxious-wreck@crazy-multifandomfangirl @punk-academian-witch@enby-ralsei@unicornssunflowersandstuff@wildhorsewolf @thetruthaboutthesun @stubbornness-and-spite @princedarkandstormv  @your-local-fookin-deadmeme @angels-and-dreams@averykedavra @a-ghostlight-for-roman @treasurechestininterweb  @cricketanne @queerly-fluid-fan @compactdiscdraws@cecil-but-gayer@i-am-overly-complicated@annytheseal@alias290@tranquil-space-ninja @arxticandy @mychemically-imbalanced-romance @whyiask@crows-ace @emilythezeldafan@frida0043 @ieatspinalcords @snowyfires@cyanide-violence@oonagh2@xxpanic-at-the-everywherexx@rabbitsartcorner @percy-07734@triflingassailantofmyemotions @virgil-sanders-the-gay-emo@cerulean-watermelon@puffed-up-bees@meltheromanstan@joyrose-fandomer@insanitori@mavenmush@justablah65@10paradox10@uhhh-hi-there-i-am-nervous@cutebisexualmess@bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti
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seven-pillows · 1 month
Note
hi woow i have a lego ask if u feel like answering one: which lego sets do u have and what are ur faves if any? and what other sets do u want to get besides the pegasus? the unicorn is soo cuute btw!!
hi yay thank you for giving me an opportunity to yap 😈 putting all this below the cut because i couldn't help myself. here are all the sets i own in the order i got them + my thoughts on them
1) 10281 Bonsai Tree
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this was given to me for my birthday last year! i think this set has become an instant classic, it's such a nice looking display piece. i put it on the windowsill in my staircase which was very silly because when it gets knocked over, those loose studs go EVERYWHERE 😭
2) 31140 3-in-1 Magical Unicorn
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this is my favourite set ever i love it so much! i impulse bought it in a bookshop one day because it has a seahorse and is rainbow, two of my favourite things. i've definitely gotten my money's worth with how many times i've built and rebuilt the different models. plus, on Rebrickable, there are so many custom models people have made out of these pieces! i've turned it into a rhino, a boat and a helicopter from other people's instructions. love that website.
fun fact, an hour or two after i bought this (this was before i even really started getting into lego) they released the first teaser for the Animal Crossing lego sets. the way i manifested that?
3) 21340 Tales of the Space Age
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this was a christmas gift! i think it's really pretty and i love how you can change the constellation in the third one. that being said, it just feels a bit silly to have a set be so 2D like this? this could have been an art print.
4) 77050 Nook's Cranny & Rosie's House
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i got this one in March! when the AC sets were announced i vowed to get all of them no matter what. i have not done this because they are very expensive for what they are and i don't love them as much as i wanted to... the minifigs are perfect but i think the way that everything is on its own little squircle base looks a bit messy. that being said, as someone who grew up loving Animal Crossing but never had any merch because it was still pretty niche, my inner child was very happy building this set :) i really enjoy how you can change the layout of the furniture in the house and all the individual outdoor pieces.
4a/4b) 30662 Maple's Pumpkin Garden and 30635 Beach Cleanup
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these two little sets came for free with the previous one! the Animal Crossing one is cute, kinda whatever though. it's pretty much just an add-on to the main sets. love Maple ❤️
the Friends one though? i held off on building it so i could have it to cheer me up some day i was feeling low. when i finally did build it i fell in love with it! it's just really colourful and cutesy. my first job was actually litter picking by the seaside so it's so bizarre and coincidental that i ended up with this. i've attached this set beside Rosie's house to try and incorporate it into my little Animal Crossing town. i guess Aliya is the player? Pascal looks different though 🧐
i will say though that this set does feel very greenwashy. i follow some sea glass collectors on instagram and they're always finding lego bricks washed up on the shore... i can't really talk because i'm out here buying their products but i do feel a bit guilty sometimes. but also life is short and i'm just trying to be happy. idk. surprise ethical discourse 🤩
Sets I want
i've ordered a few more Animal Crossing sets, namely Dodo Airlines and the Town Hall, because i want to have a little Animal Crossing town (and also just so i could get that damn pegasus 😑). i am also really looking into Lego Friends because i think they have some beautiful and interesting buildings in that theme, and the commitment to inclusion and representation just feels really nice. but yeah. stay tuned for more unwise financial decisions
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thisgirlnamedblusy · 1 year
Note
hii! i love ur writing btw and there’s no rush for this one just take ur time. i wanted to request a oneshot where marilyn x fem reader(who is pregnant) decide to take a trip up to the readers parents house for christmas (i was wondering if you could write the driving part with just cute fluffy stuff). when they arrive the reader starts to feel a little weird (the baby kicking/pains) but doesn’t tell marilyn about it. while they are getting ready to go out for a fancy dinner with the readers parents marylin senses that the reader is hiding something and she asks about it (she starts to get protective) the reader starts to get a little annoyed with the questions and she starts getting these pains so marylin takes her to the hospital only to find out it’s practice contractions. they end up going back to the readers parents house to spend the rest of the night cuddling and waiting for christmas morning. (idk if this is too much to ask but could u also write the christmas morning? just cute stuff and a lot of romance with marilyn and the reader) thank you sm ik this is a lot just take ur time with it, thank youu <3
Yess!!! Here it is!!! I hope you like it!!! Sorry about the language mistakes!!!
A special Christmas
Pairing: Marilyn Thornhill x Fem! Reader
Warnings: pregnant! Reader, fluff
Word count: 3,324
Summary: It’s Christmas, and you and your wife were going to your parent’s house to celebrate…
N/A: Requests are open!!! Sorry about the delays, I’m working hard on your requests. I love you all!!!
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“How about Beth?” Marilyn asked as she were driving.
Christmas came early and it was already the third time you spent with her. That was not the best of all, soon a girl would join your little family, so you considered that you should spend those dates with your parents, who had not seen you for a long time.
The last 8 months had been magical. A life was growing inside you and that sensation was the most incredible you had ever felt. The big moment was slowly approaching and you began to want to hold that little baby in your arms, and stop swelling your ankles. But, after all that this time, there was something you hadn't been able to decide, her name.
“I'm not going to call my daughter Elizabeth, Mari,” you said protesting. She rolled her eyes, sighing. You didn't like any of her suggestions, and you were beginning to think that your poor daughter would have no name.
“Okay…” She said sighing. “Sarah?”
You shook your head again.
“No way. Sarah is the name of the girl I liked in high school, the stupid bitch hooked up with my best friend.”
“(Y/N)!, don't say those words, you know… Our girl,” the redhead reprimanded you,.
“I doubt she's paying attention. We've been like this for two hours,” you said, gently caressing your belly.
“We wouldn't take two hours if you liked any of the names I suggest,” Marilyn complained. You shrugged and looked out the window.
“You don't like any of the ones I suggest either...” You said, resting your head on your hand.
“Let's see… You mean Natasha?”
You nodded effusively.
“It's a nice one, isn't it?”
“I'm not going to call my daughter Natasha just because you like Scarlett Johansson, (Y/N).”
“Jou...” You sighed, feigning disappointment.
“Rose?”
“Rose is my mother's name.”
“Kate?”
“The friend I don't talk to anymore.”
“Emily?”
“The math teacher who failed me…”
You always had an answer to all the names she said to you, and she seemed to get desperate.
“Hanna?”
“Montana?” You joked.
“Oh…God…” Marilyn said, tired of your discrepancies.
“Come on, it can't be so hard,” you said, patting her leg gently.
“Lily?”
“I already told you that no plants allowed,” you complained. She sighed exaggeratedly. That conversation was so absurd that you even had to hold back your laughter.
“I'm going to say the last one, and if you don't like it I'll give up,” she told you, changing her expression. She seemed pretty sure you were going to like it and you raised your eyebrows and crossed your arms.
“I accept the challenge, Mari,” you said expectantly.
“Evelyn…” she said, softly. You didn't know if it was because of the tone she put on when she said it, or because of the name itself, but it didn't seem like a bad idea, in fact, you felt a little movement on your belly. You automatically put your hand to that place and smiled. If you had any doubts, that feeling took them away from you.
“She has moved…” You said tenderly. Marilyn glanced at you briefly, and her face filled with excitement. “I think she likes that one.”
“Really?” Marilyn asked. Surely not being able to feel how she moved in your body  made her very angry. You nodded slowly, lovingly caressing that area.
“Yes, Evelyn, it's decided,” you said convinced. “It's a beautiful name...”
“I think the same, (Y/N).”
You wanted to enjoy that moment, but nature required your attention for the third time on that trip.
“Um…Mari…can we stop?” You asked, embarrassed.
“Again?”
You just shook your head up and down.
Fortunately there was a resting area a few kilometers away. Marilyn stopped the car and got out to open your door.
“Should I help you, honey?” She asked affectionately. You were so proud, and you shook your head, exaggeratedly moving your arms away from her.
“No, no, no. I'm not disabled, I can do it by myself,” you said, making an effort to get up. Marilyn crossed her arms and frowned at you. You felt ridiculous not being able to get to your feet and your cheeks turned red.
“Really?” she asked sarcastically.
You looked at her with some resentment, but you extended your hand towards her.
“Well, I may need a little help…” You said with an almost inaudible voice. Marilyn smirked and helped you up.
“Are you okay?” She asked, as worried as ever.
“Yeah, yeah… I'm going to the bathroom or we're going to have a problem,” you said, walking towards the gas station.
After a while, you returned to the car, where the redhead was waiting.
“Lets take a walk? I need to stretch my legs,” she asked you. You nodded and grabbed her arm, walking through that almost deserted gas station. The day was cold, but your wife was always there to protect you from the freezing temperatures.
“Mari…” You said, resting your head on her shoulder.
“Hmm?”
“I'm sorry you have to drive all the way…” You said with a sincere apologetic tone.
“It's okay, my love... The important thing is that you and the girl are well,” she told you, with her relaxing voice.
“Hey, she's not “the girl” anymore, now she has a name, do you remember?” You said amused.
“Oh it's true. Evelyn…”
“Evelyn…” You sighed too. As soon as you spoke, something moved on your belly. She seemed to like hearing her name very much. “Hey, Marilyn, she's moving…”
The redhead stopped and lovingly placed her hand on your belly. Her face was like the happiest person in the world.
“Yes, I can feel her,” she said, almost with tears in her eyes. “It's, it's incredible… I still can't believe it was possible.”
Seeing Marilyn so happy made you feel like you were  walking on the clouds. She was so excited. But she was right, neither of you thought you could have a child of your own.
“Well, the fact that you work at Nevermore has had a lot to do with it,” you commented, remembering how her co-workers offered to find a spell, or a ritual to make it possible.
“I don't know how to thank them for their help. This is the best thing that has happened to me in all my life…” She said excitedly. “Well, after meeting you, of course.”
You smiled and put your hand on hers, while you noticed how little Evelyn seemed to understand your words.
“Was that a kick?” the redhead asked. “Calm down, my love...” She said, speaking to your belly. “Your moms are here with you...”
A chill brought you back to reality. It was starting to get very cold, it was time to go back to the car.
“I'm starting to freeze a little…” You said, shivering.
“Sure, sure, come on, let's go back to the car,” Marilyn said, hugging you affectionately while she rubbed your arm.
You don't know how much time passed, but when you raised your head, you were already entering your small town. You realized that you had fallen asleep and you felt so bad for your wife.
“Mari…” You said yawning. “Forgive me, I fell asleep...”
“Honey, don't apologize, you have to rest,” She said, with a kind voice. “But it's very good that you've woken up, because I don't know where to go now.”
“Oh… Um… Do you see that pharmacy on the corner?”
Marilyn agreed. It was beginning to snow and visibility was gradually reducing.
“To the right and then straight ahead until the end of the street.”
The redhead followed your instructions and soon you arrived at your destination. As always, your parents' house was ridiculously decorated with Christmas lights. When you were a little girl you liked to put them next to your father. Apparently he continued to maintain the tradition.
“(Y/N)!” Your father said, opening the door. “We were starting to worry.”
“Hello dad,” you said, trying to hold in one of her hugs. “We've had to stop quite a few times, my fault.”
He also greeted your wife affectionately. He was a good man, and he never judged you for being with her.
Going back into your house was strange for you, but a comforting nostalgia invaded you at the same time. Your mother was sitting in her chair, and when she saw you she made an exaggerated expression of joy.
“(Y/N), my little one, how big you are now…” She said, hugging you affectionately. “Hi Marilyn, nice to see you.”
The redhead greeted your mother and put the suitcases on the floor. Your mother put her hands on your belly affectionately. She was very surprised when you told her that she was going to be a grandmother, but somehow, that ended her dislike for Marilyn.
“How is my precious granddaughter doing?” She asked with a goofy voice.
“Taking into account that there is a month left for her to be born, she is doing great. At least she has some heat,” you said ironically, rubbing your hands. Your town was a very cold place, it always was.
“Oh, yes, if you had come yesterday you would surely get stuck on the road. There was like a meter and a half of snow,” your father said, taking your suitcases.
“Richard, don't say those things, don't make her nervous,” your mother said, scolding her husband. He stuck his tongue out at her and headed down the hall.
“Please, sit down, I'm finishing preparing dinner,” she said kindly. You looked at Marilyn, telling her with your look how strange it seemed to you that your mother was being so nice.
“I'm going to the bathroom first,” you said, turning around.
When you came out, relieved, you walked slowly and quietly. You knew that your mother used to make mean comments to Marilyn, but surprisingly, all you heard was a soft laughter. You looked out and saw the image that you always wanted to see.
Your mother and your wife talking quietly by the warmth of the fireplace.
“Am I interrupting something?” You asked jokingly, sitting next to the redhead. She looked at you and smiled, shaking her head.
“Your mother was telling me how much you loved Christmas when you were a little girl,” she told you, rubbing your back.
“Oh.”
“When she was eight years old, she was suddenly frightened by the idea that a man with a bag would come down with the chimney and enter the house. That Christmas Eve she slept hugging a tennis racket,” she said amused. Your face burned with embarrassment, and even more so when you saw how the redhead laughed.
“Mom!”
“It was just an anecdote,” she said, looking at you with some superiority. You grunted and crossed your arms indignantly. “You should go to change your clothes. Dinner will be ready in ten minutes.”
You both nodded and went to the room your parents had prepared.
You clumsily managed to put on something more elegant, even though you didn't look like that. Suddenly a puncture in your belly made you slouch. It was a sharp, intense pain, and of course it was not lost on Marilyn.
“(Y/N), what's wrong?” she asked, worried. You shook your head.
“Nothing, it was nothing,” you said, trying to reassure both her and yourself. The pain subsided a little, but not quite, becoming a softer, but permanent sensation. You decided not to worry Marilyn anymore and pretend everything was fine.
“Hou hou houuu,” your father said as you left the room. He always managed to embarrass you in some way, but you loved him very much for it.
Dinner was elegant. Your parents liked to dress up for Christmas Eve dinner, and make it a fancy and sophisticated occasion. In addition they like preparing a huge amount of food.
“Have you already thought of a name?” your mother asked while you were having dinner. You both looked at each other excited to have an answer, but your mother did not let you speak. “I have always liked something classic, like Jaqueline. It is the name of an important woman.”
You grimaced and shook your head with wide eyes.
“I like Richard, so you can call him Richard Jr.” Your father said, maintaining the horrible habit of speaking with his mouth full of food.
You snorted and became serious.
“Dad, it's a girl,” you said, sick of telling him.
“Well, well, you never know the way it could end,” he said, ignoring your comment. You rolled your eyes and raised your hand to your forehead. You were sweating
It was hot in the house, but you didn't think it was hot enough to make you sweat. The pain from before returned, and you closed your eyes, trying to hide it.
“Honey, are you alright?” Marilyn asked, clearly noticing. “Do you need something?”
“N, no… I'm fine,” you said, blatantly lying. You knew how she got when you weren't well, and you didn't want to worry her.
“You don't look good,” she whispered to you, while she pretended to listen to another of the "funny stories about your father."
“Mari, seriously, stop worrying, I'm…I'm…” You couldn't continue the sentence. The pain became unbearable, and now you managed to get your parents' attention.
“(Y/N), what's wrong?” Your mother asked, getting up worried.
“I… I… I, it hurts,” you could say. Marilyn's eyes were wide with an expression of utter terror.
“Oh my God…” She said, placing a comforting hand on your back. “Calm down, breathe...”
“Fuck…” You said through your teeth, while you writhed in pain.
“Let's go to the hospital, right now,” Marilyn said, helping you up.
“Is the baby coming?” your father asked, also scared.
“I… I don't know…” You stammered, letting you put a coat over your shoulders.
“Wait, (Y / N), We go with you,” your mother said, going to look for her bag.
“No! No!” You screamed, holding your belly with your hand. “I need to be... Calm.”
“Hey, Marilyn,” your father said, tossing her what looked like the keys to his truck. “Take my monster, it's snowing a lot out there.”
“Thank you,” she said, walking out the door.
“Hold on honey, we're almost there,” she told you. You didn't see anything. Snow and pain clouded your mind. You had never felt anything like this, and you were worried, very worried.
At the hospital they treated you right away, luckily none of your old doctors were left, you would have to give a lot of explaining.
“Are you feeling better, (Y/N)?” the doctor said, entering the room in which they had put you. You agreed. The pain subsided after a short time. Marilyn was sitting next to you, lightly caressing your forehead.
“Yes... It seems that it doesn't hurt anymore,” you said, dizzy.
“Is the baby okay?” Marilyn asked, worried. You also looked at the doctor with a panicked face.
“Of course, but if you stay calmer…” the friendly doctor said, bringing an ultrasound machine closer to you. “Show me that belly, dear. You lifted your clothes and felt again the uncomfortable cold of that liquid.
The machine started to ring, but you weren't looking at the screen, you were looking at the doctor, trying to decipher her expressions.
“Oh yeah…” She murmured. This little baby still has a while to go out,” she said, turning the machine so that you could see it.
You always got that silly face looking at the ultrasounds, exactly the same as your wife.
“She doesn't have much left, though,” she said kindly, taking in the details.
“What happened to me?” You asked, without taking your eyes off your daughter.
“Oh, it's quite usual, it's just been some practice contractions. Your body is... let's say, "rehearsing" for when the big day arrives. It is very common on new mothers.”
Marilyn and you sighed at the same time. It wasn't ideal for your daughter to be born there, you preferred Jericho, at least there you wouldn't have to give so many explanations.
“Great…” You said, breathing normally. “Can we go now? My parents are worried.”
“Of course.”
Feeling much better, you went back to the car. It seemed as if the weather had also given you a truce, since it had stopped snowing.
You explained to your parents what had happened and the desire you had to get into bed was already unbearable. You calmly made yourself comfortable and lay on your back, feeling how sleeping that night was not going to be difficult.
“Are you feeling better, honey?” Marilyn asked you, entering the room. You nodded and hit the bed so that she would lie down with you.
“What a scare you gave me...” She whispered, snuggling up next to you and placing a hand on your bulging belly.
“It seems that Evelyn has seen my parents and she has regretted going out,” you said, amused. Marilyn laughed and hugged you even more tenderly.
“Don't say that, (Y/N). They are behaving wonderfully,” she told you softly.
“That's what scares me,” you answered, taking her hand. She brought it to her lips and kissed it lovingly.
The redhead turned off the light and she lay back down, still holding you protectively.
“Hey, Marilyn,” you said, interrupting the silence of the night.
“Hmm?”
“Do you think we'll be good mothers to her?” You asked, noticing how suddenly your eyes refused to close.
“Of course, my love…” She told you, gently kissing your cheek. “Evelyn will be very happy.”
You couldn't help but get a little excited. The idea of being a mother seemed a bit rash to you, but little by little it began to sound too good in your head. There was nothing you could do anymore to show your wife that you loved her, except give her someone to love, give her a family to care for and protect.
“I love you…” You murmured.
“Me too, honey. I love you so much.”
A short time later you began to feel how sleep was taking over you, and you decided to surrender to it. After all, the next day was Christmas, and there were many things to celebrate.
“Merry Christmas, sweetheart,” your mother said, giving you a gift.
“Thanks, mom,” you said, slowly removing the wrapping paper, just the way you liked it. “Oh, Stephen King's new book, I love it,” you said excitedly.
Marilyn also had gifts, and they mysteriously hit the mark. The calls your mother made you a week before had nothing to do with it. She was happy, radiant, but deep down you could see a certain melancholy in her face. She was an orphan, she had no family, and a day like that, it was especially hard to remember. You held her hand, letting her know that she would never be alone again, never.
“And this is for the newest member of the family,” your father said, handing the two of you an awkwardly wrapped package.
“Oh my God...” You said while you unwrapped it. You took it out of the box and frowned. “A baby-size baseball outfit?” You asked. Marilyn tried to hold back her laughter.
“Yes, like this from a young age, you can make him a child who is passionate about sports. Who knows, he might end up being a superstar. The league needs new talents,” he said, unfortunately seriously.
“Dad, for the last time, it's, a, girl!”  You said raising your tone, but without any rancor.
“And that's why she can't play baseball? (Y/N), how old-fashioned you are,” you put your hand to your forehead and you shook your head. Loud laughter filled the walls of that house.
“By the way, (Y/N),” your mother said, interrupting the fun. “You did not get to tell us what her name will be…”
You looked at Marilyn and stayed like that for a moment, feeling the most intense love you've ever felt.
“Evelyn… we’re going to name her Evelyn.”
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fxreflyes · 10 months
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hiii skye <33 music related question incoming!!
if you had to reccomend 3 songs from your top 9 albums of the year which ones would they be??
ahh hi bel!!! <333
thank you so much for asking!! 🥰🥰 This is such a HARD question (I hope u r prepared to answer it too for when I ask if u decide to post ur top 9) but I’ll do my best!
To set the vibe these are all best when it’s like night or you’re alone idk
1. Pocketknife - ruby haunt
2. Golden Age - Ethel Cain
3. Spades - Hana Bryanne (highly rec all her stuff)
I may have been in a sad vibe when I chose these… lmk if u want happier ones hahaha. I highly recommend u check out Alaska Reid tho bc she kinda reminded me of self esteem?
The 3 albums you had in your top of all time I listened through (I really loved Young Fathers btw!) all had such a cool, sexy vibe? Like danceable? Which is so so fun. You can be the cool one while I stand cheering u on from the corner w my two left feet <33
Also! I realized that I read this as what I assumed u to mean 3 songs from all of them.. but u also could have meant 3 from each of the albums. I know that probably wasnt what you meant, but if you’re curious I’ve included those below here haha :)
Making movies - dire straits: tunnel of love, Romeo and Juliet, espresso love
Disenchanter - Alaska Reid: back to this, always, French fries
Ruby haunt: Pocket knife, diving bell, still life
Golden age - Ethel Cain: Golden age, knuckle velvet, head in the wall
The nation of language: Tournament, automobile, the motorist
Dollface - Hana Bryanne: Spades, clementine, Lake Michigan (also rllt been loving dollface reprise tonight)
Get lost - the magnetic fields: All the umbrellas in London, with whom to dance, the dreaming moon
the phantom tomorrow - black veil brides: born again, blackbird, the scarlet cross
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