#THAT'S HALF OF HIS HUMOR

[nordicbananas]

the thing about having a friend that's really hard to read is you don't know if they're joking or not

(tw in the tags for mentions of someone else 'joking' about killing themselves)

[total-drama-brainrot]

been thinking about assistant!noah using malicious compliance to get out of singing.

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 195

“Oh. It’s you.” 

The entity that had been summoned practically growled, a cloak like swirling galaxies- or was it swirling galaxies molded into a cloak- shimmering around their form. One pair of arms crossed over a chest where a star pulsed with the heartbeat of universes, alive yet dying as lazarus green eyes glowered down at the league and bats alike. 

“You know you could, fucking call, right?” they whined, aura of terror suddenly broken, unnatural fear torn away and leaving all of them wrong-footed and confused.

Well, apparently all of them except for Ras, who had an honest to fuck grin on his face, one that looks almost carefree, if a little feral. Nope. No thanks. Not this timeline-

“But phones didn’t exist last we spoke, ya ‘amar.” 

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

local dog unused to such fluff & tenderness, more at 8

[wickjump]

I think the sliding scale of how much they’ve changed from classic sans is a really fascinating way of characterising the bad sanses but I need to know, in your opinion, do they all still think whoopee cushions are funny?

here is what their reactions would be in my opinion under the assumption this is meant to be a bit more fanon than canon:

killer fucking cackles. it’s like he’s never seen anything funnier in his LIFE. it’s more killer laughing than sans laughing honestly, but hey it’s a laugh.

horror cracks a smile. he hasn’t used a whoopee cushion in ages. now he probably uses thumbtacks (they actually really hurt), but they don’t work with literally anyone in the castle because they are made of bones. he’ll get back to the whoopee cushion stage eventually

dust does one of those breathy chuckles that turns into full blown laughter. he hunches over because he can’t breathe. he still does not stop laughing.

[bakedbananners]

honestly I don’t get when people characterize jake as dark and brooding… the man was literally whistling a jaunty tune ???

[kisaraslover]

if anyone has any problem making sense of the way i interpret Kaiba just remember this: Tea Gardner looks at him one day and has the dawning realization "hes like a lesbian of some kind" this should make all the pieces fall into place

[askmarietheapprentice]

My Batman hot take is Joker doesn’t have a sense of humor but wants everyone to think he does while Batman does have a sense of humor and wants no one to think he does.

[zeb-z]

roier put up that photo because he doesn’t believe cellbit is gone. a bit of his own amusement, but also entirely for cellbit’s, because as much as he got a little giggle out of it, that’ll be something that will make his husband full stop even out of his angst mode and he’ll have to try not to laugh. because roier knows his husband, and that’s his castle too, and why not make a small silly change? easier to pretend like it’s a joke, and he isn’t missing his husband. because surely he survived. and he’ll see that stupid dog photo after having survived against all odds, and laugh with roier as if he hadn’t been gone in the first place.

[zinniapetals]

do you think Ango is ever like ‘yeah sometimes i think about dying haha who hasnt’ and goes back to work and his coworkers are like what the fuck

[petz5]

grabs him by the scruff of his neck like a kitten

[ace-and-ranty]

I saw a couple comments that the scenes with Alanna's family felt like filler until you realize they were investigating Lan, and I 100% went.

Must things "happen" in a show? Is it not enough for there to be beautiful people?

[philsmeatylegss]

Dan’s ranting about his trauma from school really making me wonder if I sound like this when I talk to my therapist

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

so i've been watching Muppet compilations-

[thesolarsurfer]

Well, I once again tripped and fell into a prior hyperfixation. This time it was the often forgotten RPG, Megaman X: Command Mission. Mostly just about how neat the introductory cinematic is and also the bizarrely similar organization names in the English translation. And uhhhh whoops my hand slipped. Have a ficlet set just after the end of the tutorial area after that dramatic fall off a seaside cliff.

X awoke, silently and completely still, scanning the room and consolidating his fragmented memory cache up until the point of impact. Finding the room secure and occupied by a single non-combat reploid, he engaged his running lights and activity protocols, fans and gyros whirring to life as he sat up quickly and looked around as though for the first time. "Where am I? Who are you?"

The green and khaki reploid startled and swiveled its head around immediately, the rest of its body following suit in stages. He seemed harmless enough, with all of the indicators of a light-duty standard build and an updated transponder flagging him as maintenance staff. "Oh! You're awake. Welcome back, Mr. X. Well, I guess welcome for the first time to the Resistance HQ and welcome back to consciousness. You suffered some pretty serious damage there before we picked you up. I'm pretty sure I got you put back together correctly, though I must admit I've never worked on a system as old as yours. I sure am glad you include an instruction manual!"

X tightened his focus on the reploid's stance, assessing any signs of hostility or subtle signals to backup out of his own perception. There was nothing, no indication this was anything but a polite chat between allies. "The Resistance? Why would you-?" X started, servos in his wrist swiveling to shorten the delay between his fist clenching and converting to its buster configuration for a fight. The subroutine parsing the conversation for potential codewords and subterfuge flagged an inconsistency he had overlooked in his haste. "Right, no, Epsilon is the leader of the Rebellion. You said you're with the...?"

"The Resistance. We're resisting the occupation of Epsilon's forces after the coup he staged."

"Resistance, not Rebellion. Right. You all really could have picked a clearer name"

"We could be the Republicans? Since we support the world republic that Epsilon is trying to overthrow?"

"None of us are Irish enough to pull that off"

"...Sir?"

"Kids these days. Ancient history, don't mind me. Point is you aren't the ones building a super weapon to conquer the planet"

"Nope, no super weapons here. We're just an isolated island nation with minimal contact with the mainland. Which apparently makes this place a great location to buid a super weapon"

"Isolated is right. Getting here was certainly a hassle"

"Did they fly you out here in a bomber squadron? With reinforcements?"

"No, HQ used some low orbit platforms to deploy mobile teleporter platforms, which have since scuttled."

"So your ride here was one way only?"

"By design. We came here to put a stop to Epsilon's plans. Since we're dealing with a Maverick incident, this entire island is under quarantine. No one is leaving here without HQ's approval. We only get that after the Rebellion blockade is cleared and an investigation team confirms that there are no traces of the Maverick virus here."

"Wow, you all really take this stuff seriously. I thought so long as the mechaniloids and reploids working for Epsilon were taken down, everything would be fine."

"It's our job to be thorough. I've seen what happens when the Maverick virus escapes quarantine. Time and time and time and time and time and time again..."

"Hit your head a little harder than I thought, did you? You got stuck there, I think. That's a few too many times, isn't it?"

X stared, face pulled taut into an unreadable expression. It could be a grimace, if it weren't for every point of articulation being tensed into an uncanny imitation of neutrality. Small lights flickered in his head behind the lenses of his eyes, which were focused on a point some hundred meters behind the reploid speaking to him. The silence hung too long.

"...rrrrright. Um...I'm sure you're needed in the command room. Just follow the signs when you're ready, Mr. X."

[bumblingbabooshka]

Workforce Tuvok is my cringefail babygirl