#TUL

[rayandgay]

F*ck you, Tul.

[scarlettundrhett]

[lgbtally4ever]

Who cares how old he is? NOT ME!

[itsallaboutzayn]

I don't want him to see me as his little brother's friend.

+ P' 🥺 bonus

[anti-endo-safe-space]

You know what I really hate? When endos and pro endos will say "No you don't know what endos are. This is what they're saying. They're not claiming to have DID." while their community does include endogenic DID and a bunch of other shit.

If you actually list what they say, but you're an anti endo, they'll tell you that you've got it wrong. That no one does that. And my autistic brain can't tell if it's people genuinely not knowing that yes, they do or if it's just pure manipulation.

Endos trigger our lack of reality so much when it comes to syscourse. It makes us have no idea what's real and makes us feel like nothing makes sense. Because everything the endo community says is so contradictory. If they're not claiming to be disordered, why are they using our terms and in our spaces? Oh for the endos that are disordered? Well that should be for them then. Not for every single endo. Oh because society will see us all as the same? Doesn't matter. People can still have individual communities regardless of what the world will think of them.

Everything we have seen is contradictory. "Nobody does that" "Nobody says that." Endos that specifically engage in syscourse are the worst ones by far. I've got a few endo mutuals and like, whatever. They're chill. Stick to their own interests. They got their own thing going on and it's not like we're close or anything. I'm not triggered by them so like, let em live. Cause they're just people with their own thing going on, they're not actively spreading harm. I personally am apathetic towards endos if they're not total dick bags or actively harming others. Cause I know people fall into that community and I, a stranger that can barely form sentences sometimes, is not gonna be the one to change their mind. So for my mutuals, it's like eh, whatever. Personally for me.

But then the endos I encounter in did tags and especially the ones in anti endo spaces that try to take tags or participate in syscourse are some of the most unpleasant people ever. They're aggressive, they'll use their experiences to justify being terrible to anti endos (regardless of if that person has done anything or not), they'll completely dehumanize anti endos.

But back to my main point. Endos really just don't care. You can quote them and they'll just deny it. Cause honestly the community is built on an entirety of confusion. Not even they seem to understand what the community is like. And I get a community has nuances and subcomminities and stuff, but like. Wow. There is just...so much hypocrisy and contradictory stuff. And if an anti endo describes the community, it is always met "no that's not what they're saying" even when...I have seen endos describe it like that.

Endos make our brain hurt. We are not very smart personally, but still try our best. We still could not explain what an endo is because the definition seems to have so many "oh but also this" to it. And for saying they claim not to have a disorder or have cdd or whatever, they sure do love forcing space. And if we are against it then that means we are bigots and terrible monstrous people. As if. Trauma victims must be perfectly good and kind and accepting. Regardless of endos, trauma victims are allowed have boundaries and to be not always respond with kindness. Trauma fucks people up. Of course anti endos are going to be dicks sometimes. And even then, a lot of them tend to be extremely fair and try to be patient. But that patience is worn thin and then endos will use it to try to act like every anti endo terrible person. There is no winning really. It's exhausting.

Hey, taking paragraph by paragraph to help us follow it and not be confusing from us.

Agreed whole heartedly. We've seen a lot of pro endos try and defend endos going "they don't claim to have DID" meanwhile they follow and reblog from endos that say "endoDID" "endoOSDD" and shit. A lot of endos actually DO claim to have DID just without trauma. We've literally seen a blog saying "nontraumagenic DID" like no. You need trauma for that shit.

Saying this from an autistic system, we can't tell either. To us we tend to think they are trying to manipulate and not because they're evil or anything but because they want people to believe their way. It could be they just don't know but, we don't know.

We get that, we have paranoia with lack of reality things, it's why we took a long break from this blog is because it was triggering our paranoia with endos in the ask box and such. Endos are genuinely so confusing because we've seen several people in a single post go "yeah we aren't disordered" and then go and say "it's ableist to not include us in disorder spaces since society see's us the same" like no. Not saying race and systemhood are the same for this analogy but. Society especially in the west treat people from China, Japan, Philippines, Thailand, North Korea, South Korea, Pakistan, Afghanistan, Mongolia, Vietnam, Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia and pretty much every single other Asian country as the same. Does that mean that they all should get to invade spaces for an Asian country just because they are seen as the same by society? No, that's not okay. How people are seen does NOT define if they should share a space. Do want to make it known, they should not all be seen as the same as every country in the world has different people and should not be seen as the exact same

We've seen a lot of "nobody says that" and "nobody does that" meanwhile we'll see them do that to us. We get that, live and let them live. We don't have any endo mutuals but that's because while yes we are technically anti-endo, we tend to be more endo-apathetic because we don't have the energy or mental state to worry about how bad they are, definitely not to want to fight with them because nothing gets through.

We DEFINITELY get that, especially the using their experiences. We've had one person (not naming names because we are ANTI HARASSMENT) sit there and comment on our posts and send us asks talking about how anti endos are bad because of what happened to their friend. That's like me saying that pro endos are bad just because they've been mean to us. To play devils advocate, we have seen a lot of anti-endos in endo tags doing the same thing.

They really don't seem to. We've seen people literally send them a screenshot of a post they made and they'll deny it was them completely. There is a lot of hypocrisy and contradictory things. And they will just deny it even when it's shown that's what they said.

We get that, they make our brains hurt too. We aren't entirely sure how to respond to this one besides that is one of the truest statements. Trauma victims are NOT always going to be kind, some become rough, some become kind, some change between the two all the time. Boundaries are allowed and patience has it's limit. Just because someone has reached it doesn't mean they're bad or evil. It means they were pushed too far

[seatawinans]

i can try dating you.

[blmpff]

23.11.22

[acehowes]

I imagine that Win goes to Tul's room to talk to him and finds him in his room just SOBBING. hand clutching his shirt over his chest and bawling his eyes out.

Then they talk and Win helps/knows that Tul is gonna go to the resort for Waan.

[jjsanguine]

Boss: hey don't you need to actually interview me

Tul: eh

Boss, internally: this restaurant is almost certainly a mob front, but this guy is cute + single and also I need the money

[rayandgay]

alexa play everybody talks

[scarlettundrhett]

[mareenavee]

Light The Way

Happy birthday, @thana-topsy <3 Neloth rambles, so I let him. Enjoy your Morrowfic :3

Light the Way

--- Please check the AO3 tags on this one. ---

“This is the most absurd thing I’ve ever heard,” Neloth said. “Though I should hardly be surprised, considering it’s you.”

Teldryn Sero, fool that he was, had the nerve to sigh. Dramatically. He did rather have a flair for that. All things considered, Neloth doubted he’d act any other way, what with the Nerevarine nonsense hanging over his head. An inflated sense of self is all it amounted to, really. And if Neloth knew anything, it was how to deflect that, much to Sero’s chagrin.

“We’ve been over this, Neloth,” Sero said, scrubbing a hand over his face in exasperation. He had a new scar—a raised scratch that cut counter to the tattoos that spiraled down his face. He’d said it was a cliff racer attack. Neloth rather doubted it. “My way is more effective. Blatant murder over on the Peninsula isn’t going to win you any points with the Council. It’ll turn into a House War before you have a chance to cackle.” Sero shook his head and began to pace the room while cracking his knuckles—an annoying habit made worse by the hollow clunk of his chitin armor. Neloth grit his teeth against the urge to yell at him over the unnecessary noise and drama. “Besides, I am…they won’t let me leave Vvardenfell anytime soon. And what are you really going to do over there by yourself?”

“House Dres needs to be put in their place, and I need to regain favor after…well. You know.” He was relatively safe here in Sadrith Mora, but they’d sent the Morag Tong after him a handful of times in the recent past. Shame, that. A waste of good fighters. Neloth fidgeted with a soul gem on his bookshelf until it stood just right to refract the sun filtering in through his window. It acted like a prism and washed the floor with shifting multicolored light. For a fleeting second, the pristine order of the moment brought him peace. “There’s things you’ll never have to worry about at your rank. Or even as Hortator, if you do choose to go be whatever it is the Empire insists you’ve got to be.”

Sero’s face twisted through several emotions before it settled back into the familiar, frustrated scowl he always wore. “The Empire can go f—”

“ —yes, yes, we know your sentiment. Spare me the histrionics, if you don’t mind,” Neloth interrupted with a flap of his hand, “because we do rather have things to accomplish today if we aren’t simply going to wreak havoc on the Mainland as I’d intended.”

“You know, we will have to discuss that topic again later,” Sero drawled, scratching the back of his neck. “As much as I don’t want to. For now, though, you’re right.” He huffed and crossed his arms over his chest. “Hortator. It’s madness.”

“I told you, you’re going to have to talk to Dratha first.”

“Neloth, she hates me. And you. And everyone, I think.”

“How on Nirn could anyone hate you, oh great Nerevarine,” Neloth droned dismissively. Sero shot him a glare and threw up his hands in disbelief. He muttered to himself in Dunmeris as he leaned against a far bookshelf, fiddling with some Dwemer gear or another Divayth Fyr had brought over the last time he’d deigned to visit Tel Naga.

Neloth grinned at his own minor victory and glanced over at the distracted Nerevarine, caught in the glare from the soul gem. His frown was etched into his face. Gods only knew the weight of all he was responsible lately was heavy enough to merit the dismay. Nobody seemed quite as capable of being so sullen over something as ridiculous as the entire Nerevarine situation. Well, perhaps now that it wasn’t quite a rumor anymore, it carried more weight. If any of this was real—though Neloth still had his doubts—it was a responsibility that came with expectations even Neloth would be remiss to shrug off in favor of this abolitionist nonsense. 

He knew Sero was procrastinating. Neloth had called him on it earlier, though the comment had been deflected. Regardless, like anything worth having, he’d eventually have little choice but to take the title. Or—Sero being Sero—convince himself he’d already earned it. The utter chivalry of the entire situation got exhausting after a while. What had happened to the slovenly bandit with a chip on his shoulder? Neloth could have sworn it hadn’t been that long—months, if that—since he’d first arrived looking for, of all things, employment. It was a valid path for a reformed criminal. But a bandit with a boyish face he’d still been, nevertheless. Apparently, prophecy and legacy did a number on one’s priorities.

Though, come to think of it, Sero had never really been the type who allowed himself to be pointed in a direction and told to stab. He’d always been too clever for whatever he’d believed about himself all those years before. Not that Neloth would be caught dead telling the fool that, though.

Neloth shuddered at the implications of admitting any kind of respect for a non-mage, first of all, and an otherwise nameless urchin besides. Imagine. The Council would be in hysterics, and the ruse would be dropped, and every ounce of power he’d clawed back to himself would evaporate in the blink of an eye. No. Securing a seat on the Grand Council was imperative if he wanted to keep his status. One did not simply earn a seat the same as individual House Councils: one had to make connections—or honestly, more likely lie or commission writs to clear a spot. No. There had to be concrete proof of concept. What, exactly, could one do as a Grand Councilor that would advance the House’s position as a whole? -> Read the Rest on AO3

[dramalocks]

☇✈ tul pakorn; simple+edit ♡❞

☇ like or reblog ⋮ @moodscreens

☇ don’t repost our edits

[anti-endo-safe-space]

have an frog

-noodle

AHHHHHH /VVVVPOS

THANK YOU FOR THE FROG!!!! /GEN

[sadtrash-masculine]

waan: poker face when he sees me, damn he is really good at lying

everyone, including Tul himself: no he is not.

[bl-bracket]

Round 1: Pat (Bad Buddy) vs Tul (Between Us)

[Submitted Reasons Under Cut]

Pat: "The vibes are there. Also the pout"

Tul: no reason submitted