#Their situations aren't really the same an outside might think she has no blame

[breadedsinner]

I think an overlying theme across all 3 of my canon girls and their relationships is "I need to believe there's hope for you, so that I can believe there's hope for me, too,".

[natsubeatsrock]

I'm Still Thinking About Fairy Tail and Rave Master After All These Years

I'm going to level with you. The original post was a mistake.

Any reason to think that way about my own writing?

Surprisingly, no one else did. As much as my writing hasn't aged well, this post shows how naive I was back then.

The comparisons to Fairy Tail and Rave have been made time and again. It's a prime source of annoyance for fans of Rave. I knew that making the original, but I get it more now. Most (not necessarily all) people making these comparisons don't know what they're talking about. I said this about RWDE and got pushback. Here, some things said about similarities can be refuted with a second reading of Rave. Or, on occasions, a first reading.

Although, I will say Mashima isn't doing himself favors. It's insane how many references and callbacks to his past works Mashima's current works have. I didn't mind it as much in Fairy Tail, even getting more of what happened. Reading EZ (and Black Rock, but I'm really behind) and seeing the callbacks to past works. My default reaction to these things in my Quick Notes is as follows: *sigh*.

Some people will tell you it's lazy, but I don't see it that way. Some of these connections are pretty cool to see across different worlds. And, outside of the obvious ones, the callbacks are done with enough distinction between them. Honestly, seeing the same things over and over again is annoying. I'd rather see another Ajeel-Yajeel situation than go to another Mildian anything.

Don't even get me started on Sieghart.

Hold on. Let's talk about that.

Technically speaking, the design is based on a character from Mashima's debut one-shot: Magic the Illusion. However, the character design we recognize throughout his works is first seen in Sieghart from Rave. The design shows up because Mashima didn't feel great about how he ended his character arc. I'm not willing to spoil that in this post, but having reread the situation... I don't blame him for bringing Sieghart back.

In Fairy Tail.

Justice isn't always similar to the others. However, that was when it started to be taken too far. Of course, Mashima had to do it again for HERO'S. At that point, we'd gone too far. Seeing a cover with all the different look-alikes was more annoying than endearing. It's not necessarily uncreative, but it's not welcome.

This might not be the most annoying comparison. I'm more annoyed with the comparisons between Nalu and...

Harelie? Whatever the Haru and Elie ship is called.

Let's get this out of the way. They might be Mashima's best ship. I'm not sure I'm breaking new ground with this. But I would unironically put them up as one of Shonen manga's best ships. Unlike many ships, their development felt natural. It was a delight to see them become endgame. (We'll get to that end.) I would say there are writers better than Mashima who could learn from his romance writing.

The issue is that, of course, fans try to read their dynamic into Nalu. I'll admit some panels share parallels with each other.

Fans agree that Haru is a better parallel to Lucy. In the same way, Natsu parallels Elie. I don't particularly disagree with that view. However, it does ignore things they have in common with their gender counterparts. You can't tell me Haru's fights aren't closer to Natsu's than Lucy's. It's interesting to think of Haru as something like Lucy in Natsu's role or Elie as Natsu in Lucy's role. Still, there are ways that Natsu and Lucy's relationship is different from Haru and Elie's. That's not just more mud to sling at Nalu's romance. Lucy's narrative role in Fairy Tail is unique among all of Mashima's heroines as the closest thing to the "series narrator" the story has.

Speaking of which, I have to talk about my girl Elie. I don't think anything gave me more appreciation of Elie than HERO'S. I feel like Lucy gets too much flak. I've jokingly referred to Rebecca as "Elie Heartfilia" on occasions. However, I love how Elie is handled. She's more willing to take an active role in situations, which is helped by [spoilers for the series]. I love that Mashima did this with his female lead. It's disappointing we never saw this as much from other leads. (Unless I'm missing something in Black Rock.)

Though, as I have said before, Mashima does write female characters with active roles and the ability to fight. Some (not most or all) writers show female characters as inferior to their male counterparts. I always think of Asuna in SAO getting shown up by Kirito. (inb4 "But what about Mother's Rosary?") That's not a consistent issue with Mashima's writing. I love it. It's not just the key players. Minor women and one-off female characters get great moments.

I say that, but Mashima has never shied away from fanservice. I used to be super against fanservice, but I've mellowed out over the years on this issue. Not enough that it doesn't annoy me to see some of the things Mashima has done over the years. I know I just talked up Elie, but Haru's introduction to her was accidentally seeing her panties while sitting down. They look back at it like it was a funny moment. It feels wrong.

However, I need to bring up the most contentious example of this. Rave fans might think I'm talking about one of Julia's fights. Tempting as it is, this doesn't take place in canon. During a volume Q&A session, Mashima mentioned that he got a request to draw the Rave girls showering. His objection was that parents probably wouldn't enjoy seeing that in a volume, which is commendable.

Then he does it anyway with a not to tell the parents.

Let's get this straight. This isn't a fanservice issue. Mashima's had plenty of opportunities to draw characters in undress. They were mermaids for a bit. That was a reasonable vehicle for fanservice. The actual picture isn't the most gratuitous he's drawn. (read: you know the Julia fight Rave fans) 

My issue is one of judgment. Mashima recognized that what he was asked to do might not be the best thing. Yet, he did it anyway and tried to be slick about it. This is worse with the hindsight of the Internet and electronic volumes.

This attitude extends to the ending.

Oh boy, the ending.

When I made the original post, this was my first time experiencing a Mashima ending to a manga. If you didn't read my thoughts, I was very positive about it. I loved how things played out, watching sad things get undone, and finding out how Levin tied into the main series. It was all incredible.

It's been [EIGHT] years since then. Fairy Tail ended, and I've read Mashima's other works. Not to mention, I've finished other manga.

I think it's sad that Mashima saves some of his worst writing for the end of a series. It's almost like he doesn't wish for the series to end. I'm not joking when I say his best ending might have been HERO'S. While Fairy Tail was only a break in hindsight, the others didn't end well. It's not much better in EZ now.

I still think that it's great to see the main ship payoff. I made that panel my background on two computers. However, it would have been much better to see how things got to where they were. Perhaps a few chapters to deal with that and end on chapter 300.

That said, it's fair to say this still ranks among the best of Mashima's writing. The only thing that comes close to it is EDENS ZERO, but I think this edges it out (for now). It's crazy that there are so many ways to read the series. With multiple Humble Bundle opportunities and the publishing of Kodansha's version as ebooks, fans owe it to themselves to give it a shot.

I'm proud to say that, over the years, I've collected physical copies of the complete series. It wouldn't be possible without those pandemic stimulus checks. I've been able to reread the whole series as it was published by Tokyopop, save the last three volumes. I went through it with scanlations my first time around. I reread one chapter in the scans because it was in full color, but nothing beats reading the physical books.

There might be a project I have down the pipeline for Rave. I intend to talk about one connection between Fairy Tail and Rave.

In Conclusion:

Stop whatever you're doing, click off Tumblr, and read Rave Master! NOW!!!!!!!

[willel]

This isn't about MikexWill or ElxMike, just about the character Mike Wheeler. What's your take on him? (No pressure tho.)

Hm, I feel conflicted with Mike, but it's mostly because of the writing. I feel like the writers, outside of the show, want us to feel a certain way about him and I get it. But they aren't WRITING it that way. And it's not a "fill in the blanks!" situation either, they just write Mike so weirdly that I'm confused on what they're doing with him.

To me, it feels like they aren't really writing Mike as a character. He's only being written as a love interest and it's been this way since season 3.

Where is his personal conflict outside of his romance?

El - Boy howdy she is always dealing with a lot of personal shit, too much to name actually.

Will - The boy is dealing with his sexuality, loneliness, with a dash of supernatural dust on the side

Lucas - Dealing with racism and bigotry. In trying to do something about it and protect himself, he finds himself abandoned by his friends

Max - Still working through her complex feelings about her step brother and step father, good and bad. Also having to take care of her mom and not so great living conditions. Her best friend moving away and feeling like a burden for her ex-boyfriend

Dustin - Struggling with his grades I guess....?

To be honest, Mike and Dustin kinda had the same issue for me. There didn't feel like there were any personal issues or growth with them for a while. In season 3, Dustin ditched the group because "They didn't believe me about Suzie and ditched me" even though 3 of the 5 friends did believe him for a while and stayed up there with him for hours trying to contact Suzie. But hey, 13 year olds exaggerate so eh. But he didn't really have any "issues", he was just... there. I mean, I guess that isn't BAD but it's not very interesting. At least with season 4, something deeply personal has happened to him so I wonder where they'll go with that.

Then there's Mike, continuously ditching everyone to make out with El and take jabs at Hopper. (that first episode of season 3 almost felt like he was doing all that JUST to get back at Hopper, but I like to think 13 year olds aren't THAT devious) I don't really blame him for being intimidated by a grown man resulting in him lying though. But the constant whining about his relationship while there's a monster on the loose was tiring.

I guess I can't say I'm very invested in Mike's character right now. It's always about El. When it's not about El, it's about Will. There's rarely anything about MIKE.

Before Volume 2 dropped, I started speculating maybe Karen and Holly might kick the bucket. As sad as it would be, that would certainly rock Mike's entire character, right? He lost his sister and his mom, how will that affect their family and him personally? Surely Mike and Nancy would grow EXTREMELY close. (yes, I have thought about this a lot. They would still be financially stable because of Ted, but they aren't close to their dad so they'd grow closer to each other instead and finally understand each other more. Finally, the Nancy and Mike content this series has needed since season 1)

Maybe he would become more empathetic/emotional again? At last, HE would have even more personal investment in taking down the big baddies.

So I guess that's where I'm sitting at right now.

"Please Duffers, can Mike have some non-romantic character arcs again? Give him a dog in this race!"

It's a bit too late for that now imo (the killing Karen and Holly thing I mean, doubt it's gonna happen now) but I hope they do something really early in season 5 that just... gives Mike's character that boost it needs.

[impala1967dwinchester]

Dean Winchester: Miracle and Simon

Pairing: Dean W. x Wife!Reader Pov: Dean Warnings: Fluff, a little bit of angst, Dean, dogs, talk of infertility, sadness, overall fluff, comforting Dean, Sam is mention. Summary: Y/n and Dean learn after a long time of trying for children that Y/n is unable to bare a child. With this news, they decide to wait. When Dean comes across two very cute pups how can Dean pass it up? Word Count: 2.3k A/N: Written for band-psychos 1.5 followers writing bingo challenge. This is sad, but good at the same time. By the way, I have absolutely no clue what it's like to be told that I won't be able to have children, so what I may say may be wrong. Also, I'm sorry if this is something that affects you. Square: First Pet

Dean Winchester Master List

Main Master List

Tag list: @band--psycho @akshi8278 @deanswaywardgirl @hit-meup69 @doctorlilo @fofisstilinski @wonderfulworldofwinchester

Month, turned into years of trying for a baby. It was okay in the beginning, but it turned into constant disappointment. Not disappointed in Y/n or myself. Just overall disappointment in the situation.

How we had been stripped of the ability to have kids. Y/n being stripped of the chance of being the best mother I know she can be. I felt more hopeless, and helpless than I had in any other part of my life.

My darling wife unable to bare a child, unable to be the most gifted thing in life. Unable to become a mother. That day was horrific, She cried in my arms and spent the drive back home in silence.

She stayed away, she had moved back into her old room. Forcing everything that we had built to be crushed. She pushed everything and everyone away.

It was horrible, she wore her ring still. Years of marriage, years of trying. Years of our life being shut out. Being put behind a wall because she felt as if she wasn't enough, wasn't worth being with.

There were nights of course I'd try and make conversation with her, but it always ended in silence, or in me talking enough for the both of us.

The few months that she pushed me away were the hardest, hearing the loud sobs echo through the halls. Not hearing her voice at all was the worst of it all, not being able to see the bright smile that used to blossom on her face was horrible.

So many things that I wish that I could change for her, so many things that I wish that I could make better. Better for her, better for me, but most importantly better for our relationship.

Finally one night.

Hearing a soft knock on my door, even with it being ajar. "Dean.. Can I come in?" Y/n asked, barely poking her head into my, our room. I was still a little confused on that one.

"Of course honey," I said pulling the bedspread back so if she wished she could climb into bed with me. She walked in slowly, not bothering to shut the door behind her.

She wore an old shirt of mine, sleep shorts, and her slippers. She looked just like she has always looked comfortable, but the look on her face was a displacement of how she looked. Her voice was white, heavy purple and black circles under her eyes, her face even looked a little bit too skinny.

Y/n say slipping her slippers off before climbing to the bed with me. "Hey." She said timidly like, "Hey baby," I said. During the time she had taken to be by herself, I had done more than enough research about what happened when women learned that they were infertile.

How they need space, or how they didn't like to be touched, how they could have outbursts of many different emotions. It's been five months and now Y/n's back in our bed. I'm hesitant to touch her, I think she can tell.

"Let me first say that"

"I missed you"

We spoke at the same time, speaking at the same was something that we always tended to do... God to hear her voice was amazing, like cutting butter so smooth and calming. She was so perfect to me no matter what was going on outside of this moment right now.

I smiled, and Y/n smiled back at me. It wasn't a full smile, but it was true and halfway there. "Do you want me to go first?" I asked not wanting to push her if she wasn't fully comfortable with it.

But if she wasn't comfortable with it then she wouldn't have come to my... our room and sat down next to her husband. Right? 'Stop asking so many questions.'

"If you want to Dean." She said her voice starting to waver. She's going to start crying, start talking Dean.

"I'm going, to be honest with you here. I don't know what to say.' Smiling afterward, ' I... I want you to know that you aren't alone in this, I know now that you needed your space, I want you to know that no matter what you think I don't blame you at all, not once. Because I'll forever love you. I've also been reading a lot,' Y/n was smiling now, raising her eyebrows at my reading comment. 'Anything for you Y/n you know that, but regardless I've been doing some reading on this situation, how this may affect us, you and myself. I just want you to know that I'm here for you." I said finally shutting my mouth.

She didn't look like she was going to cry anymore. Y/n was smiling a bright tooth-grinning smile. "You know Dean even when you don't know what to say you always manage to say the right thing, every single fuckin' time," She said through her smile.

Is it weird to say, but I know when Y/n is at her most happy because she curses. She spouts out every single bad curse word there is known to man. Just to tell you how happy she truly is.

God, I missed her smile. You don't realize just how much you miss something or even need it until it stops coming into your life and then comes back into your life a bullet.

I reached out to touch her, but I'm still hesitant. Very hesitant she most definitely saw that. When I went to take my hand back to my lap, she reached out grabbing my hand.

She's so soft, and her hands god how I've forgotten how much smaller her hands are to mine. Look at her hands, look at that ring, still shiny and glistening under the light of our room. That ring I think is what brought her back to me, no scratch that I think our love for each other is brought her back to me.

I had been looking for weeks after Y/n finally came back. Everything needs to settle down before I can even prompt the question to her. I want her to feel safe, I don't her to feel pressured or like I might be trying to replace the idea of children.

I again dived in and did the research for my idea. Sam even helped me, helped me to try and find the right one for her and me. Sam knows a lot of things but he especially knows this about me. When I do something I do it all the way, no half-assing anything and that only becomes ten times more when Y/n is thrown into the situation.

Doing the best research I could with the help of my brother of course. I found the best thing, not something I necessarily like the idea of but anything to help Y/n.

Anything for her.

They passed my screen, and before I knew it I was scrolling back up to them. In the loud and bold letter, it read.

These two come together, a pit bull and a golden retriever. Price is free, just come and pick them up today.

It just clicked, you ever have those types of moments. Where you can feel deep down in your mind, and body. Gosh, I'm really starting to get more and more like Sam.

I shouldn't say that because honestly, that's how it was for me when I first met Y/n. But that is most definitely a story for another time. I jumped from my seat sending the library chair to slide and then fall against the tile floor.

"Are you okay?" I heard Y/n's sweet voice ringing from behind me. 'Shit I forgot' "Yeah I'm fine, I just remember that I forgot to grab something when I was out earlier," I said, turning jamming my phone in my back pocket, calmly walking over to her, and kissing her temple saying bye.

I rushed, driving down the gravel road that leads to home sweet home. If nobody knew what I was doing they'd probably all think I was trying to get away from a murder that I just committed.

The drive to pups was silent. I'd driven baby so many times alone, but this time it just felt different. My impala was the first one parked, a few people close behind me. I rushed up to the fairly older man. He looked over my shoulder, he huffed before waving the other people off.

"Now listen heree son, I'm given' you 2 pups for nothing, so I don't want to hear anything." He said stepping down the porch and walking in front of me to the red broke down barn.

"They're in here. All yours." He said pulling back the door and then walking back to his barn house. Pointing in a very general area, there were 2 pups as the old man called them. Curled up into each other, 'cute' I thought to myself.

'I've already been gone for too long, hurry up Dean.' I said to myself. "Do they respond to commands? Like come, or no?" I asked as I slouched down to the height or near height of them. He hummed and said a few things under his breath.

"Come here," I said gently, just like if I were talking to Y/n. I know that as husband and wife you're supposed to talk about things before you just go outright and do them, but I kind of figured that Y/n wouldn't have any cons to having some furry children. It would most definitely take her mind somewhere else for the moment.

Waking them up from their shallow sleep, they were both wary at first, but grow to be giving me kisses had me rolling around on the dirty ground.

"Come on son!" The old man said. I jumped up from the ground dusting my clothes off and whistling for the dog's attention. "Let's go" They followed us out of the barn and chased after each other. There was no need for a transaction seeing as he just wanted them gone.

I whistled again, both chasing each other and coming to a fast stop in front of me. I was hesitant to let these pups in my baby, but anything for my girl, for her happiness, anything for her.

Both jumping up and finding a comfy spot and laying down. I speed back home, I'd already been gone for much longer than I originally wanted.

I once again speed down the gravel road heading to my home sweet home. Parking in the garage caused the pups to raise their heads. That being the first time, at least they don't complain about my driving like Sam does. That's rather nice.

I opened the back door and let both of them slip out. Yes at that moment I had realized that I had in fact told nobody of my plans, and I also had nothing to give them food-wise.

Letting them into the bunker they seemed to feel at home, but the more odd thing was that they didn't seem to care about anything other than finding Y/n.

An odd moment, it's like Sam said years ago sometimes animals can sense evil, so why can't they sense happiness or even sadness. I wonder?

The two of them led their own ways to the door of our bedroom. "Sit," I said quietly. They looked at each other and sat down, well actually they laid down.

I knocked and then came in seeing at it was also my room. "When'd you get back?" Y/n's honey slick voiced asked. "Just a few moments ago, love...." There was a comfortable silence between us, but Y/n always knows.

"What are you hiding Winchester?" She asked, pulling the sheets from her body. 'No don't get out of bed' "I need you to stay in bed for this surprise if you will." I said gesturing her to lay back down. " Be ready okay?" I said opening the door,

There sat a golden retriever and a pit bull. I heard her gasp "Dean?!". Behind me I saw the two dogs slowly sit up fully, they looked over at me, then over at Y/n.

I nodded and whistled. The pitbull was the first one to reach Y/n his nose nudging her arm. "Dean?" I heard again, so I turned I was smiling, the dog has already made a way onto her lap. "We.. are.. you." Y/n was most definitely stumbling over her words.

"Yes, they're ours. I thought that if we y'know. We could find a way to take care of something. I think he likes you, baby." I said walking all the way into the room having the golden following close behind me. "Yeah and I think she likes you, Dean." She said, patting the pits head.

"They need names," I said nodding to let the golden know that it was okay for her to jump up on the bed. I want my bed to remember them too, cause my bed is memory foam.

"Miracle and Simon. What do you think." Y/n said resting her hand on top of the pits head. "Whos who?" I asked, Y/n pointed at the dog taking up most of my lap, "That's Miracle" then moving and pointing over the sleeping pup in her lap snoring "This, sweet boy is Simon." She said a single tear falling down her cheek.

"What's wrong honey?" I asked "I know that I didn't even ask you if this was okay," I said worrying as more tears fall down her soft warm-toned cheeks.

"Nothing is wrong Dean, I just remembered that I wanted to maybe name our son Simon when we finally got pregnant." She said, I wiped her stray tears and said, "We've got our son and daughter just in fur version. And being together is enough for me." Kissing her forehead. A whispered, "Thank you Deanie Beanie." I rolled my eyes and kissed her forehead again.

Completed on: 05/24/2021

Posted on 05/25/2021

[itsclydebitches]

Here's a quandary I've suddenly found myself in: where do you stand on writers deleting their own works, fanfiction or otherwise? I've had this happen to me on more than one occasion - I go to look for an old favorite and find it's since been deleted from whatever site I read it on.

On the one hand, I'm inclined to think that, "Sure. The author wrote it, it's their call. I don't own the work - I certainly didn't pay for it. It's their decision, even if it's disappointing."

But at the same time I can't help but consider the alternative - if I believe in death of the author (and I do), that an author's work fundamentally isn't solely theirs once it's been published, posted, etc., then it also seems wrong to have a work deleted. Stories aren't the sole property of their creator, after all.

But then I circle back. D'you think there are different obligations between authors and readers and the works being made in fandom space? I know if I had bought a book and the author decided they wanted it back, I would feel pretty comfortable telling them no, given I'd paid for it and whatnot. But that's a different world from fanfic and fandom space generally.

So. You're insightful Clyde, I'm curious as to what you'll have to say here (and to all y'all thinking about it, don't flame me. I haven't decided where I stand here yet - haven't heard a good nail-in-the-coffin argument for or against yet).

Val are you a mind reader now? I’ve been thinking about this exact conundrum the last few days!

(And yeah, as a general disclaimer: no flaming. Not allowed. Any asks of the sort will be deleted on sight and with great satisfaction.)

Honestly, I’m not sure there is a “nail-in-the-coffin argument” for this, just because—as you lay out—there are really good points for keeping works around and really good points for allowing authors to have control over their work, especially when fanworks have no payment/legal obligations attached. In mainstream entertainment, your stories reflect a collaborative effort (publisher, editor, cover artists, etc.) so even if it were possible to delete the physical books out of everyone’s home and library (and we're ignoring the censorship angle for the moment), that’s no longer solely the author’s call, even if they have done the lion’s share of the creative work. Though fanworks can also, obviously, be collaborative, they’re usually not collaborative in the same way (more “This fic idea came about from discord conversations, a couple tumblr posts, and that one headcanon on reddit”) and they certainly don’t have the same monetary, legal, and professional strings attached. I wrote this fic as a hobby in my free time. Don’t I have the right to delete it like I also have the right to tear apart the blankets I knit?

Well yes… but also no? I personally view fanworks as akin to gifts—the academic term for our communities is literally “gift economy”—so if we view it like that, suddenly that discomfort with getting rid of works is more pronounced. If I not only knit a blanket, but then gift it to a friend, it would indeed feel outside of my rights to randomly knock on their door one day and go, “I actually decided I hate that? Please give it back so I can tear it to shreds, thanks :)” That’s so rude! And any real friend would try to talk me out of it, explaining both why they love the blanket and, even if it’s not technically the best in terms of craftsmanship, it holds significant emotional value to them. Save it for that reason alone, at least. Fanworks carry that same meaning—“I don’t care if it’s full of typos, super cliché, and using some outdated, uncomfortable tropes. This story meant so much to me as a teenager and I’ll always love it”—but the difference in medium and relationships means it’s easier to ignore all that. I’m not going up to someone’s house and asking face-to-face to destroy something I gave them (which is awkward as hell. That alone deters us), I’m just pressing a button on my computer. I’m not asking this of a personal friend that is involved in my IRL experiences, I’m (mostly) doing this to online peers I know little, if anything, about. It’s easy to distance ourselves from both the impact of our creative work and the act of getting rid of it while online. On the flip-side though, it’s also easier to demean that work and forget that the author is a real person who put a lot of effort into this creation. If someone didn’t like my knitted blanket I gave them as a gift, they’re unlikely to tell me that. They recognize that it’s impolite and that the act of creating something for them is more important than the construction’s craftsmanship. For fanworks though, with everyone spread around the world and using made up identities, people have fewer filters, happily tearing authors to shreds in the comments, sending anon hate, and the like. The fact that we’re both prefacing this conversation with, “Please don’t flame” emphasizes that. So if I wrote a fic with some iffy tropes, “cringy” dialogue, numerous typos, whatever and enough people decided to drag me for it… I don’t know whether I’d resist the urge to just delete the fic, hopefully ending those interactions. There’s a reason why we’re constantly reminding others to express when they enjoy someone else’s work: the ratio of praise to criticism in fandom (or simply praise to seeming indifference because there was no public reaction at all), is horribly skewed.

So I personally can’t blame anyone for deleting. I’d like to hope that more people realize the importance of keeping fanworks around, that everything you put out there is loved by someone… but I’m well aware that the reality is far more complicated. It’s hard to keep that in mind. It’s hard to keep something around that you personally no longer like. Harder still to keep up a work you might be harassed over, that someone IRL discovered, that you’re disgusted with because you didn’t know better back then… there are lots of reasons why people delete and I ultimately can’t fault them for that. I think the reasons why people delete stem more from problems in fandom culture at large—trolling, legal issues, lack of positive feedback, cancel culture, etc.—than anything the author has or has not personally done, and since such work is meant to be a part of an enjoyable hobby… I can’t rightly tell anyone to shoulder those problems, problems they can’t solve themselves, just for the sake of mine or others’ enjoyment. The reason I’ve been thinking about this lately is because I was discussing Attack on Titan and how much I dislike the source material now, resulting in a very uncomfortable relationship with the fics I wrote a few years back. I’ve personally decided to keep them up and that’s largely because some have received fantastic feedback and I’m aware of how it will hurt those still in the fandom if I take them down. So if a positive experience is the cornerstone of me keeping fics up, I can only assume that negative experiences would likewise been the cornerstone of taking them down. And if getting rid of that fic helps your mental health, or solves a bullying problem, or just makes you happier… that, to me, is always more important than the fic itself.

But, of course, it’s still devastating for everyone who loses the work, which is why my compromise-y answer is to embrace options like AO3’s phenomenal orphaning policy. That’s a fantastic middle ground between saving fanworks and allowing authors to distances themselves from them. I’ve also gotten a lot more proactive about saving the works I want to have around in the future. Regardless of whether we agree with deleting works or not, the reality is we do live in a world where it happens, so best to take action on our own to save what we want to keep around. Though I respect an author’s right to delete, I also respect the reader’s right to maintain access to the work, once published, in whatever way they can. That's probably my real answer here: authors have their rights, but readers have their rights too, so if you decide to publish in the first place, be aware that these rights might, at some point, clash. I download all my favorite fics to Calibre and, when I’m earning more money (lol) I hope to print and bind many for my personal library. I’m also willing to re-share fic if others are looking for them, in order to celebrate the author’s work even if they no longer want anything to do with it. Not fanfiction in this case, but one of my fondest memories was being really into Phantom of the Opera as a kid and wanting, oh so desperately, to read Susan Kay’s Phantom. Problem was, it was out of print at the time, not available at my library, and this was before the age of popping online and finding a used copy. For all intents and purposes, based on my personal situation, this was a case of a book just disappearing from the world. So when an old fandom mom on the message boards I frequented offered to type her copy up chapter by chapter and share it with me, you can only imagine how overjoyed I was. Idk what her own situation was that something like scanning wouldn’t work, but the point is she spent months helping a fandom kid she barely knew simply because a story had resonated with her and she wanted to share it. That shit is powerful!

So if someone wants to delete—if that’s something they need right now—I believe that is, ultimately, their decision… but please try your hardest to remember that the art you put out into the world is having an impact and people will absolutely miss it when it’s gone. Often to the point of doing everything they can to put it back out into the world even if you decide to take it out. Hold onto that feeling. The love you have for your favorite fic, fanart, meta, whatever it is? Someone else has that for your work too. I guarantee it.

So take things down as needed, but for the love of everything keep copies for yourself. You may very well want to give it back to the world someday.

[imaginationintowords]

Folklore [song series]

peace

Modern Day AU! Steve Rogers x OC!Reader

Plot: Inspired by Taylor Swift’s new album Folklore. The story follows the timeline of Bucky and Elizabeth’s life throughout the years

[word count: 2265]

[a/n: sorry for the wait. it was my birthday last weekend so i was just chilling. but here it is, just in time for the anniversary of folklore's release. the final chapter of my folklore song series. i started this last fall, and it's now the end. thank you to all who read the story and commented and showed it love. you don't know how much that means to me, that people liked it so much. thank you for joining this journey with me, and I hope the ending is a nice little bow to finish it off]

Series Masterlist

Age: 27

Year: July 2021 [two weeks after engagement]

Location: New York

Two weeks after their engagement, Steve and Elizabeth were still living off of the high from their engagement.

They were currently spending some time in New York. Liz had just graduated from law school that spring, while Steve was still working at the same architect firm. That was actually also why they were in New York.

The company was opening another branch in New York. Steve was offered a promotion, but it would only be available at the New York office.

In the few years since Steve graduated, he's been excelling in the architect world. He's really made a name for himself. Last year he was named the "hottest" up and coming architect. Ever since then he's been very busy. His boss gave him the month off, to propose to Liz, and to take a tour of the new office.

Steve told Liz that they'd only move back if that's what she really wanted. Especially since she just finished law school, and she still needs to take the state bar exam. She would need to figure that out soon, because the NY state bar exam date was closing in on her.

She and Steve decided a month in NY would help them both decide if moving back would be best. If they did decide to move back Steve would already have job waiting for him. Liz on the other hand might not.

Luckily for her, Loki was currently working at a law firm in NY. He was able to get her an interview while she was in town. He couldn't promise her a position, as there were a lot of people up for the job, some had even interned there. But Liz still went to the interview giving it her best.

Loki and Scott moved to NY two years ago, both their jobs taking them there. They ended up eloping right before their move, two years after Thor and Wanda got married.

Thor and Wanda had officially been married for four years. They were also considering the move over to the east coast. Both of their families lived out there and it just made more sense to them, especially with them trying to start a family.

Family was a massive pro for Steve and Liz as well. Moving back would mean seeing their loved ones a lot more. Especially now with Poppy about to turn six, part of them felt like they were missing out on their goddaughter's life. Steve also missed Bucky.

Bucky was doing really well in his career. He's currently working as a sound engineer for a movie studio. A big step up from the local recording studio he started in.

He was currently looking for a place to move to in Manhattan. Now that Poppy was about to be six, and she was already going to school in the city, it was time they officially made the move.

Actually he's no his girlfriend had decided to move in together.

Dr. Jane Foster is a pediatric fellow. She was in her first year of fellowship at a private practice in Manhattan.

Bucky and Jane met three years ago, through Sam Wilson. Bucky was hesitant at first to date, because he's a single father, and his main priority has always been Poppy since the day she was born. But

Sam had convinced Bucky to go on just one date. One date was all it took. Bucky was immediately hooked. Same went for Jane.

Jane was incredibly understanding of Bucky's situation. And it also helped that she loved children.

Jane met Poppy four months into the relationship and since then everything has been going great for the three of them. Jane instantly fell in love with Poppy and Poppy loved Jane a lot. Bucky had truly never felt happier. When he was alone with his girls he felt complete. When Bucky brought up the idea of officially making the move, he and Jane made the decision to move in together. They were practically already living together at that point. They were all very excited about this next step in their relationship.

Steve and Elizabeth were watching Poppy for the day while Bucky and Jane worked. They decided to spend their day in the city, walking around what could possibly be their new neighborhood. Poppy was loving having them around, and talking up their ears about school and all the friends she has made.

Around lunch time Poppy started to get hungry and sleepy. They decided to stop at a café and get some lunch.

Liz went inside while Steve and Poppy sat outside. Poppy ended up falling asleep on Steve while they waited for Liz. Steve found himself thinking about the possibility of living there.

Truth be told part of him did want to move back. He genuinely missed the New York City way of living. As he relaxes into the sounds of the city, he hears his name being called out. He looks straight ahead, looking for whoever called him, or if they were calling another Steve. As his eyes scanned the crowd, he met the eyes of the last person he would ever think he would see again.

He was completely shocked.

"Peggy?" Steve questioned, as the woman stopped in front of the table.

"I thought that was you," she smiled, "Wow. You most certainly aren't 17 anymore."

Peggy checks him out, as he stayed in his seat. She wasn't being subtle about it either.

Steve cleared his throat, noticing the way Peggy was eyeing him up and down, "Well it has been a decade wince we've last seen each other."

Peggy glances at the sleeping Poppy in his lap.

"Is this your daughter?" She asks pointing at Poppy, then glancing at his left hand noticing there wasn't a ring on his finger.

"Oh, no. This is my goddaughter. She's actually Bucky's," Steve tells her.

"No way," she gasps, surprised by this information. At that moment Elizabeth walks out of the cafe with a number plaque for the table.

"Oh my gosh! Elizabeth?" Peggy greeted.

"Peggy?" Liz asked confused at this older version of Peggy Carter.

"Yeah," she smiled.

Elizabeth put the number plaque on the table, Peggy catches the shimmer of her engagement ring.

"Oh wow! Congratulations," she says grabbing Liz's left hand, "You have a really beautiful daughter. I'm so happy for you and Bucky. High school sweethearts, making it til the end."

Liz was confused, she looked at Steve, hoping he could get them out of this awkward, and slightly uncomfortable situation.

"Um actually, this isn't her daughter, and she's not engaged or married to Bucky," Steve says, "We're actually the ones engaged."

Peggy was taken by surprise at this brand new information, not expecting to hear those words come out of Steve's mouth.

"Oh, I'm so sorry. My mistake," she apologizes, embarrassed.

"Well Congratulations," she awkwardly says, glancing at her watch, "I better be on my way. But hey here's my card. I moved back a couple of months ago. But we should all get dinner and catch up. There's clearly a lot I have missed."

She hands Liz the business card and walks away.

"Well that was random," Steve awkwardly laughs.

"What are the odds," Liz says sitting across from Steve, "Didn't even know she was back."

Liz cleared her throat and tried to focus on the city around her.

Con: Peggy Carter.

Steve and Elizabeth continued on with their day. At the end of the day, they dropped Poppy off at Jane's apartment and headed to their hotel.

Throughout their day there was a slight tension between the couple, it didn't go unnoticed by the both of them. Neither could figure out what the tension was. They both knew it had to do with the sudden appearance of Peggy Carter.

They laid in their hotel bed, each with a book in their hands. Their nightly read.

Elizabeth had a hard time focusing on what she was reading. She tried to force away thoughts of Peggy Carter out of her head. She flipped the page and stopped when she noticed her engagement ring. She took a long stare at it.

"Do you regret it?" She asks, turning her head towards him.

"Regret what?" He asks putting his book down and turning to face her.

"You and Peggy breaking up," she says, "Do you regret it?"

Steve is taken back by Liz's question.

"No," he shakes his head, "I don't regret it."

"Do you ever wonder what you're life would've been like had she stayed?"

Steve ponders over the question, "Truthfully? No. Once we said our final goodbyes in London, that was it. I never once gave it another thought. I closed that chapter as soon as I boarded my flight. Not that the breakup didn't hurt. Because it did. I just knew then that she wasn't my future. I never thought I would see her again."

"But you did," Liz quietly says.

"Yeah, which was weird," he says.

"I wouldn't blame you if you wanted out of the relationship to be with her," she says tearing up.

"What? No," Steve quickly says, sitting straight up, "I don't want that."

"I just mean, if you wanted to. I would completely understand. She was your first love."

"Yes, she was. But I don't love her," he says, "I know this is only coming up because we saw her today, and there's been this out of awkward tension in the air ever since. But I don't want to be with Peggy."

Liz glances down at her engagement ring again, trying to hide the tears of insecurity rolling down her face.

"Look at me," he softly says, placing his hand over her's, "I love you and only you. I asked you to marry me because you're the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. You and only. Peggy doesn't mean anything to me. I haven't even thought of her since high school. You mean more to me than anything in this world. Especially more than some high school ex-girlfriend. You, Elizabeth are my entire world."

"Why would you even think that?" He gently asks

"Just seeing her and the way she looked at you before she realized we were engaged," she says, "She wanted you. Then my mind started to wonder if maybe that was a sign for you two to get back together. And maybe you'd realize you regret proposing to me."

"There isn't an ounce of regret in me that makes me feel like I'm making the wrong decision," he assures her, "There is no one else for me. You are it. Proposing to you wasn't for confidence. Proposing to you was the only thing I've ever felt so sure of. It was the only thing I've ever done that I didn't second guess. You are the only thing I've ever felt so sure of."

"This," he grabs her and and gestures between the both of them, "Is where I want to be for the rest of my life. This brings me a peace like no other. You are my peace."

Age: 27

Year: May 2022

Location: Somewhere in Upstate New York

"You are my peace," Steve sniffles, as he holds Elizabeth's hands, tears flowing down both of their faces as they stood up in front of their closest friends and families, reciting their vows.

"I don't think I would be where I am today without you and your continued support. I meant what I said years ago about following you wherever you went. All I ever want is to be by your side. Nothing else has ever meant to me as you do. My future doesn't exist if you're not apart of it. Nothing matters if I don't have you. Since the day we met, twenty years ago, I knew you would play such an important part in my life. We clearly aren't the same people we were then. Yet over the many years you haven't strayed away from being this kind supportive, understanding person. To know one day our future kids will have that as a mother, overwhelms me with joy and love. They will be the most luckiest kids in the world.

"You are it for me. You are my world. I know everyone says weddings and getting married is the start of a new chapter, but it doesn't really feel lie that for us. It just feel like our story is continuing. There's no end in sight. And I'll make sure of that, by being supportive, kind to you for the rest of our lives. There won't be a time where you ever have to question my love for you. Because Elizabeth Sanchez, you are love."

Elizabeth has tears streaming down her face. She didn't' care how she looked. The only person that mattered was the man standing before her, professing his never ending love for her.

The pastors signaled her, that it was now her turn to speak.

"I figured I'd try and keep it short and sweet, because you know exactly how I feel about you Steve," she begins, "There's only one thing I want to say, more so I want to thank you. Thank you for giving me love. An unconditional love that never seems to fade. Since day one of our relationship. You've been patient. You always say I'm the supportive one, but you fail to see that you are too. Even more than me. You've always been willing to drop everything, not just for me but for all the ones you love. Anyone who has Steve Rogers' love, should count themselves as being incredibly special. I am the luckiest pet one out of them all because I get to be the recipient of your love every single day. I am the one who gets to spend the rest of their life calling you my husband. My partner. My life. You've shown me a love like no other. So thank-you Steve, for loving me."

Folklore series taglist: @iheartsebandchris @perksofbeingabookworm @atomicsoulcollecto @void-imaginations @stumbleonmywords

Permanent taglist: @rosegolddivinity @definitelynotafangirl-blog1 @1awesomeash @princess-evans-addict @24kbratz @introvertatitsfinest @imagine-all-the-imagines @also-fangirlinsweden @rororo06 @getlostinyourparadise @small-death-and-codeine @bonkyboinkybucky @sincerely-kizzy @loudthoughts-softspoken @aquariuslavenderhoney @cherriesanwine @goalexis123 @sassyslytherinshai @loving-books-is-easier @katiaw2 @xoxabs88xox @osugahunnyicedtea @katierpblogg @thefridgeismybestie @maybeimkate @lou-la-lou @demirunner @celineann91 @marie1115 @fangirl-couch-potato @lokisironthrone @daughterofthenight117

[sorry-i-ship-drarry]

This probably was a complex idea but here goes. I tried my best. Hope I met your expectations @bleurlover12

Love him or lose your clothes

"Now for today's special announcement , forbidden forest is still out of bounds , third floor halls are forbidden for anyone below 3rd year and a list of all that I can see right now is stuck outside Mr. Filch's office, kindly do the favour of actually going through it once " Ms. McGonagall announced with stern look , the new headmastress of Hogwarts. There were a few snickers around the hall which came to a halt as soon as she began speaking again

" Now for the more important announcements for the year, as we have all have suffered immensely in the period of war and many were on the run due to the investigations in the ministry or otherwise , the school have decided to keep recapitulation classes for the students in 8th year who have missed the entire year and wish to learn " Minerva briefly looked at Ron , Hermione and harry , who weren't surprised to know that they did get indirect attention .

" the recapitulation classes would only cover the important topics of the year and an exam at the end of march which will not be accounted for in the future or the year exams . These will only be experimental classes without any of the theoretical homework if you have wondered . We understand the immense amount of grief you all have suffered but it is important for every wizard and witch who dreams to end up somewhere to know what they will face outside. I repeat the classes will only be for year 8th and year 7th students if they wish to join. The rest of the information would be given in the classes . Interested students may drop by my office and submit their names later. To the next part , to build unity among school, we have arranged inter house collective quidditch matches. For the rest of the year Slytherin and Gryffindor House will be one team and Hufflepuff and ravenclaw will be one team who will play against another. Off you go now " Minerva ended her speech with immense amount of groans from the entire hall. Quidditch as Harry liked to think was the only way to let off some heat if he was mad at the other house, especially Slytherin but now as they had been combined it would be rather difficult .

As months went by, quidditch faced more and more trouble for Slytherin and gryffindor team, the problem being there couldn't be 2 seekers coming from the history that Draco and harry both were great seekers. As more and more trouble began to come up , it was decided that only for the position of seeker there will be 2 players for each team meaning 4 seekers in total and 2 snitches to be caught.

This might've developed in the quidditch practices that harry declared he neither hated Draco nor liked him any more than anyone else. The only problem however was, he was lying to himself. There wasn't a Doubt that draco had changed quite a lot in the past few months and that might've made harry question his sexuality. It was after one of the practices when he was getting into the showers he bumped into Draco who had just gotten out of the shower. While harry was either busy looking at the scars on draco's exposed chest or looking at his exposed body, he didn't know, draco had been telling him something that harry didn't quite get.

" are you even listening ?" Draco snapped his fingers in front of Harry's face. He finally looked up to draco's face which held an amused smile.

" I said there isn't enough hot water left " Draco replied smirking when harry didn't say anything. In the thick intensity of the moment harry without a word hurriedly left for the common room, again shared with Slytherin. Harry liked to believe that it was done purposely to torture him right now. It didn't help that draco showed up not more than 15 minutes later and didn't stop smirking at harry. The moment however soon died out in a couple of days.

Everything was fine or not weird as harry liked to believe until the week before Christmas . Harry was going back from potions recapitulation classes (which frankly harry still hated to be in, if it wasn't for Hermione he wouldn't had joined at all) when he realised he had accidentally picked up draco's wand instead of his. The only problem with it was that he had look almost everywhere for draco until he finally found him in astronomy tower ( he really was slow at using marauders map) . Draco didn't refuse Harry's invitation and they ended up talking about a lot more than they let on, harry blamed the firewhiskey that draco smuggled for finding draco's presence downright pleasing.

It was the next day during disapparation lessons things got a bit too suspicious for harry. It was as if whatever harry liked to do now involved Slytherin and more specifically, a particular Slytherin, Draco which only made things for harry bit more difficult.

" now I know most of you have already learnt apparation however a few of you aren't ministry approved yet. If anyone who's already ministry approved is more than welcome to leave or stay" as soon Mr. Lloyd said a few students left the classroom, leaving harry, Draco, Ron, Hermione by choice, Dean, Seamus again by choice or not a choice who knew and a couple others. The leftover students were immediately put into pairs and they began with the lesson.

Harry and draco stood alongside listening to the instructions carefully and soon started performing. The weird thing was right after alongside apparation between harry Draco, harry noticed something strange .

" where's your tie ?" Harry asked . Draco furrowed his eyebrows slowly touching around his neck only to find his tie was missing. It wasn't the only thing, harry was suddenly very much aware of his missing sock in his left foot. They assumed it might've loosened before apparation and fell out and It was indeed on the floor. This didn't however help the fact that his sock was missing. He looked back at Ron and held the same expression as harry, as if a part of the clothing was missing. They didn't really talk about it and the next day again came back for apparation tests. Harry again apparated along with Draco and this time he was aware of his lost belt which harry later on found behind draco's legs. Draco had a missing missing shoe. Their curiosity lingered on but they assumed that it was something wrong that they were doing because nobody else in the room seemed to have missing a shoe or a sock or in his case a belt except ofcourse Ron who frankly harry thought was just as wrong as him.

Harry and draco decided they'd practice the apparation in hogsmeade after hanging out together like Hermione had suggested to do but no matter what they tried something was missing and each time more items were missing. It was just after harry has lost his shirt while practicing that they came to halt. It got more awkward than he had liked to admit, it was the same as the day of that quidditch practise because draco was left speechless. Harry himself wanted to tease Draco for staring but had simply obliged with not doing so.

They practiced for a few more days after their usual hang out at astronomy tower until one day they both were rendered with nothing but boxers while practicing. They knew something was definitely wrong but were too embarrassed to say anything. As a few more seconds went it became hot and bothering for both of them that they dressed up and decided not to practice anymore and maybe practice with someone who had already passed the test. The weird part was, they both knew apparation very well.

Their questions weren't answered until among the last few lessons of apparation Hermione had questioned something almost just as embarrassed as harry was that day.

"Mr. Lloyd are there any other potential side effects of apparation other than splinching ?"

" oh yes my girl " he smiled " it's not a very discussed side effect considering its only applicable for young men and not women and in most cases not even evident "

" do you think we had potential side effects ?" Draco whispered in Harry's ear, if only draco knew how much it bothered him. Harry shrugged off knowing if he opened his mouth his voice would come out high pitched.

" you see if a young man have unrealised attraction towards someone then during a side along apparation they might lose their clothing while disapparating . It might even be little things if the feelings aren't that strong but the stronger the feelings are the more you'll lose the clothing. However it's only applicable during side along apparation with their love interest and not otherwise. This might somehow be used to identify your lover or soon to be lover , something like amrotentia " mr. Llyod ended with a strange smile over his face, as if he was almost proud of not sharing that information earlier.

If harry didn't know any better the situation between Draco and harry grew much more awkward than it was previously and the entire lesson they couldn't stop blushing. Harry looked at Ron behind and he knew that Ron had experienced the strange side effect with none other than Hermione, he chose not to ask him about it.

When the lesson ended harry walked out along with draco not breaking the silence until Draco spoke up " so I guess now you know "

" I guess now we both know " harry replied much more in the sense that they had come face to face with the fact that they had feelings for each other that they didn't know of. Maybe it started from after the day of quidditch practice or maybe it was the playful lessons, he couldn't care anymore . He liked draco and that was the bottom line.

" so..." Draco turned to harry blushing Scarlett red while running the back of his neck nervously.

" I think it's better if the next time we do apparation we're doing it after a date " harry smiled. Draco was almost shocked and embarrassed of thinking about the aftermath of the date " really !"

" I think there's nothing more left for us to do right!" Harry replied shrugging. Draco smiled at harry and nodded .

" I'll send you the note for the date then" harry replied awkwardly. Draco bit his lip lightly before nodding and walked back to the tower together.

" harry ?" Draco held harry back by his wrist before entering the dorm tower.

Harry turned to Draco with a confused expression.

His confusion was washed away when Draco lightly pecked Harry's cheeks " I look forward to the date harry potter " and he left.

Harry was left there blushing to himself lightly touching where draco had kissed his cheek. It felt nice harry thought. It was better than nice and harry entered his room and giddily threw himself onto the bed. He felt like a teenage girl.

It was after the first date that the losing clothes after apparation did not matter much, they had already planned the night anyways.

Side along prompts

Day 2- running finger through the hair

Day 3- hiding face in the neck

[eagles-translated]

Answering Eagles questions before the season 3 finale (Part 1/2)

I've received a bunch of questions since 3x08 and 3x09 dropped, so I compiled all the questions into two posts. I had to split them up because Tumblr only allows 10 images per post. Anyway, keep reading to see my answers and enjoy! 👇

My theory is that everybody will be gathered together for some event and then shit goes down. Sort of like the ending of 1x08.

We've seen an image of Adam, Omar, and Ludde together at a party of some sort. I can't post it here because of Tumblr only allowing ten pictures, but you can find it in Ludde's prediction post that I made prior to the season 3 premiere.

Felicia might be absent from this considering how her mental health has been recently, and instead opting to stay at home rather than attending a party.

I have my suspicions that Elias will be attending this party, though. We saw him at some concert in the season 3 trailer and they made it look like he was watching Amie singing in Stockholm. But maybe Amie will be performing at this party and Elias is watching her here instead?

It seems like Amie singing at the end of the season has become kind of a recurring theme. She performed "Follow" in 1x08 and "Second Sight" in 2x10 (on the radio, but my point still stands). I wouldn't be surprised if they followed this trend by having Amie perform a new song in the season 3 finale.

Maybe Elias approaches her after the performance to express how good she is. He hasn't really seen her do a live performance since 1x08, where she still hadn't really come out of her shell. They've also grown a lot closer this season. Perhaps Elias even has something more to tell her?

I can't help but feel like this party will end on a bad note, though. We have that whole thing with Andreas potentially buying a gun or whatever he's up to (discussed this more in another question down below).

I have a feeling this party is going to get interrupted in some way and that the season is going to end on a major cliffhanger.

I don't even know what they'll do with Ludde and Felicia. Ludde has no idea what happened to Felicia in these last two episodes, and I hope they'll have a conversation just to clear the air surrounding the whole press situation. Ludde still loves her even if he broke things off, and I would really like to see him reassure Felicia that the blame lies with Jack and not her. I don't think they will get back together and repeat what 2x10 did since the drama is still so fresh. Felicia shouldn't really get into a relationship right now, either.

I'm unsure about Klara. I feel like she's mostly done her part this season, but maybe things aren't completely finished between her and Elias. Maybe there were some things left unsaid on Klara's part when she met with Elias at the café, and Elias never really confirmed where he was at.

This talk regarding their relationship (and Eagles?) might happen in the season finale. I'm leaning towards them ending it for good since I doubt they will be getting back together. However, I'm pretty sure that it will be on good terms now after everything Klara did for Felicia.

I somewhat agree with this, even if it was worded a little harshly. Felicia shouldn't have been so quick to share the most personal thing that had ever happened to her on her first date with a guy she had just met. And she shouldn't have done the same thing with Jack, even if it was someone she'd known for longer.

I think she should've at least waited a while to see if the person she told her secrets to was trustworthy—sort of like Ludde did when he told Felicia the truth about how Andreas landed in prison. That's a huge secret and it made more sense to have it be shared closer to the end of the first season rather in the first three episodes.

On the other hand, I can definitely understand why she was so quick to share her problems. Felicia was really lonely when she first came to Oskarshamn. Her parents were fighting all the time, and her dad was only focused on Elias' hockey career. She carried these huge traumatic events and had nobody really supporting her when she ended up at the hospital and was sent to rehab. Felicia couldn't share the secret about her dad's affair either. She really had nobody in her life that she could talk to about any of this.

So it's reasonable that when she finally met a person who she really connected with, she felt comfortable enough to finally share these burdens she had been carrying. She actually started out by saying this to Ludde in 1x03:

I don’t know why I’m telling you this. I don’t talk about it to people.

I don't think Felicia set out to tell her whole backstory to Ludde. It just happened. I'm not saying it was the right choice, but Felicia probably realized that she desperately needed someone to talk to. And she said herself that it felt really good to just get these secrets out (until it didn't when she thought Ludde had spilled the beans to Klara). Felicia even made sure to stress to Ludde that he couldn't tell anybody about her experiences in the US.

Felicia: I don’t want this to come out, that’s really important. Ludde: Of course, I’d never tell.

A similar situation arose with Jack. Felicia was more isolated than ever and she had aborted a child that nobody knew about—not even her mom. That's a huge secret to carry on your own.

Felicia had known Jack since she was a child. She trusted him and he was a family friend. Not only that, but Jack has the ability to be incredibly charming when he wants to be. If anything, it makes more sense that Felicia told her personal things to Jack rather than to Ludde. She couldn't predict that Jack would turn out to be a cheating asshole who would leak everything in the press. It's kind of sad that Felicia would have to constantly keep quiet about all the wounds she's carrying when support from the people around her is the thing she needs and craves.

I've never said that the Kroon family's reaction to them being slandered in the press wasn't valid. I actually understood their anger and frustration quite well, but they let their emotions get the better of them. Yelling at Felicia did nothing to help the situation even though it's fair that they would direct their anger at the person who was to blame in that situation.

It wasn't pretty, and ganging up on Felicia (when her personal business had also been leaked) wasn't the best way to deal with the situation. But because their privacy was violated, I understand it. I can agree with you on that part.

It just sounds like you're implying that Felicia isn't allowed to share personal stuff at all because it would be "gifting ammo to expose her family". If Jack had actually been a decent person and never ruined her family's reputation in the press, you wouldn't be as harsh on her. The situation just got blown out of proportion for everybody.

Put these questions together since they were sort of asking the same thing regarding the last scene of 3x09. Here is the full transcript from that scene if anybody needs a reminder:

Man: Hey. Andreas: Hello. Man: Wasn’t yesterday. Welcome to the outside. Andreas: Thanks. Hey… The last time I saw you, you said you knew somebody who sells. Man: Are you thinking of a fully automatic? Andreas: Yeah, whatever. Man: There’s a guy in Stockholm. I’ll fix it. I’ll send you the number. Just tell him I sent you. Andreas: Alright, good. Got it. Man: Good. Good, see you. Andreas: See you.

It actually didn't click for me at all when I first saw this scene that Andreas could've been talking about buying a gun—my first thought was actually that he was talking about a car because I'm that stupid lmao.

Anyway, there is definitely potential for the season to end on a cliffhanger involving a gun and Andreas. I have a few theories on what the season could end like. Season 3 has been so much darker than previous seasons, so while this might feel too serious for a show like Eagles it's definitely not out of the question after the recent episodes. Anyway, here's what I think could happen.

1. The season ends with Andreas having the gun—but we don't know if he'll actually use it 2. The season ends with Andreas just about to shoot someone—but we don't know who (?) 3. The season ends with Andreas having just shot someone—but we don't know who (?)

I don't know which one of these theories I'm leaning more towards, but I really hope this won't be the outcome for Andreas. He just spent close to a year in prison for something he didn't even do. Andreas is not a criminal, and it would be disappointing if he actually ended up doing this. They could be throwing us for a loop.

I mean, personally I don't think shooting somebody because they were the reason my younger brother didn't get into his dream school is enough reason to risk ending up in prison for. Yes, Ludde got his reputation ruined, but there are other ways to solve that than to resort to crime. Andreas should know that too, considering the whole thing where he got landed in jail because he tried to protect Ludde.

This could absolutely be the case but at the same time I'm a little unsure. Hopefully things will just go up from here since the last two episodes were so dark, but I'm unsure what that last scene in 3x09 will mean for the season finale.

I hope they will do something similar to 2x10, where the ending was more bittersweet than just sour. We had the moment with Elias finally being drafted to the US and then Felicia and Ludde finally getting back together. We saw Amie achieve her dreams as a pop star. And yet there were still sour tones with us seeing Klara's dad passing away, Ludde being brought to the police station, and Amie being entirely alone and heartbroken.

2x10 was a really good episode and the ending montage gave me goosebumps the first time I saw it. I think ending a season like that, with both positives and negatives, hits you more emotionally rather than just ending on one or the other. The 1x08 season finale was really depressing and while the cliffhanger was intriguing, it didn't hit as hard for me as 2x10.

I'm kind of curious if they'll be able to top that episode—it's definitely among my personal favorites.

My stance is that if Elias and Amie won't happen in 3x10, they will be guaranteed to happen in season 4. There is no way they're passing that opportunity up. They have clear chemistry, are fan favorites, and it absolutely makes sense for them to get together considering where they're at in their journeys—both having realized their dreams but then coming back to Oskarshamn because it didn't turn out the way they thought it would.

I think they have a mutual understanding of each other—in season 3 more than ever—and it would definitely be a shame if their potential was wasted. So I can't see the writer(s) passing up that opportunity.

There is a possibility for Elias to make a move in the season 3 finale, but I think it's better to keep our expectations low. We just had Felicia go through something really traumatic and her whole family is dealing with the ramifications of Jack slandering them in the media. Elias's relationship with Amie might have to take a backseat because of that.

There's also the thing where we thought that Petra might forbid Amie from seeing Elias because the newspapers painted him as a sex addict. But I think Petra and Amie have reached an understanding in their relationship after the whole Michael thing, and I can see Petra taking Amie's word when saying that Elias isn't what the press makes him out to be—and that he's not like his father.

I really do want to see something happen between them in the season finale, though. I'm excited but impatient for Elias and Amie and I think there are many fans who feel the same way.

But there is a reason they've been so slow to develop their relationship. Elias and Amie have grown as people separately and they're at a point where I believe they're more compatible than they ever were previously. They've been building their character development, slowly but surely, and I like that they haven't been rushed together like Felicia and Ludde were.

If nothing happens between them in season 3, don't lose hope. I think season 4 will absolutely be Elias and Amie's season.

I hope so. I hope Petra isn't listening to the tabloids and tries to see what's in front of her instead, which is that Elias is not Mats.

Elias is entirely his own person. I know Petra was heartbroken when Mats left her after getting drafted, but when Elias was put into this exact situation he hesitated because he didn't want to leave Klara alone.

Klara: Elias… I don’t understand why you’re even thinking about this. Of course you’re going [to the US]. You’ve always wanted this. Right? Elias: But I don’t want to leave you.

Petra doesn't know about this, but we as the audience do. Elias's actions have always been caring and supportive (and I'm not just saying this because Elias has always been my favorite character). It should only be a matter of time until Petra realizes that, if she just gave him a chance.

I think that Petra will eventually see that Amie has finally found someone special who makes her happy. That Elias isn't at all like how Mats was at his age, or like Michael who didn't even bother to support her.

Petra has been so unlucky in love and I hope she can see through her prejudices and let her daughter be happy and loved, in the way that Petra never really got to be.

It could happen, but even if it does I don't think they will be separated for most of season 4.

Maybe Amie decides to finally take charge of her career and tells the record label that she's doing this her way or not at all. Maybe she even decides to quit to try a music career on her own terms, or with a different label that doesn't make her as successful but doesn't control her.

I never felt like the particular record label Amie ended up with was a great fit for her. Yes, she's very talented and I would love to see her become an even bigger star, but only if it's done the way Amie wants it to be done. There could be the possibility of Amie leaving the label, just like how Elias left the US.

I definitely think Felicia has picked up on Elias overworking himself. He's been at the gym constantly, even during the school field trip to Stockholm. Elias left this huge opportunity in the US to come back to Eagles, and the overworking could be a result of him feeling like he has to prove to both himself and the people around him that this decision was the right one.

They've been super subtle about this whole thing and I hope they will be discussing it properly soon instead of just giving us small snippets. There was discussion about this being an eating disorder, but I think it's leaning more towards overworking like you said and bad eating habits (in my opinion, we would need to see something more drastic before drawing the conclusion that Elias might have an eating disorder).

There's so much that needs to be brought up in the season 3 finale—like what exactly Andreas is planning and its outcome, Felicia healing after her suicide attempt and potentially having a conversation with Ludde, and maybe some sort of triangle drama between Elias and if he'll choose Klara or Amie. There are so many possibilities here that I have my suspicions that this storyline won't be fully resolved in just one episode.

I think it will be pushed forward into season 4 because that seems to make the most sense right now. I've been wrong before though, so something else could definitely happen.

[theangrypokemaniac]

@nyarthsis

First of all, it's symbolic.

No reason was ever provided why Jessibelle looks so much like Jessie. It would've been simpler and more instinctive to invent an entirely new design. Instead, it was decided to turn them into identical strangers.

I can't see what purpose this serves other than to validate Rocketshipping. As his fiancée, Jessibelle is the romantic figure in his life. Whether he likes it or not, James is in a relationship with her, albeit a long distance one.

The intention is for he and she to be married, but the similarity between the girls invites viewers to picture Jessie in that role. It's hard not to, since the Jessibelle is simply Jessie from the upper class. Whatever way he turns, he's fated to fall in with a red head.

Bear in mind also that this idea has not sprung from thin air. Up to this episode, Jessie and James have often acted like a couple in all but name: rowing, hugging, holding hands and inseparable. People may have had an inkling beforehand but this confirms suspicions.

Remember James's parents too. Yes, they selected Jessibelle for him because she's wealthy and presumably from a good home, but they genuinely appear to have affection for her too, and want her to join the family.

Since James ran away it could be concluded that Jessibelle replaced him in their lives, explaining that relationship. Maybe in these circumstances she went from being just a suitable future wife to the daughter they never had, and like adoring parents, they can't see any wrong in her.

Plus, the reason James gives for leaving home was Jessibelle's demanding nature, asking he use the right spoon and do things a specific way.

To Ma and Pa, that's commendable behaviour: she's merely trying to mould their wayward son into a gentleman. That he won't accept instruction just shows him to be difficult.

Personally, I don't think what she asks is so bad. He's got a cosseted life, waited on every minute, due to inherit billions from parents who didn't walk out, and can really have anything he wants.

It's got to have some catch, if only to be fair to the rest of us. Yet having to conform to a set of exacting rules of etiquette isn't really so awful, especially when it's all you know, and everyone in your social circle follows them, as in they aren't expecting anything they wouldn't do.

Considering that James rejected these in favour of joining Team Rocket, whereas Jessibelle remained a law-abiding lady, it looks like she was right to try and curb his instincts, as see what he got up to when left to his own devices.

If all Ma and Pa cared about was money and background, they could've found anyone of that description for James, even an ugly bride, but they made a point of selecting a pretty, decorative candidate, suggesting they like her appearance too.

Add all this together, and it could be said that, whatever Jessie and James feel for one another, any happy ending is an impossibility The gulf in status is just insurmountable.

Ma and Pa would never welcome Jessie, a poor thief, who's led their son astray, over a refined example of femininity, polished and sophisticated, and certainly not when they love her.

Choosing Jessie means James may well be impoverished for the rest of his life, and he's known luxury, so going without it is more obvious than it is to her, who grew up deprived.

Jessie and Jessibelle are similar in personality too, except that the latter is not always violent. I don't believe her ladylike manners are an act, I think she really is like that most of the time. It might well be that the 'dominatrix' routine is a one-off, to punish James for abandoning her.

Jessibelle is actually quite a tranquil person. She never loses her temper, barely raises her voice, and remains calm and controlled throughout. As a wife, that may be what James can expect.

Jessie however is constantly on the edge, forever losing her temper and dispatching her fists. I don't blame her for that; it's how life has shaped her.

At worst, James will be beaten by Jessibelle, but has all that moolah as consolation. With Jessie, a beating is the norm, and he's poor and starving. It'd be understandable of it all got too much and he decided he's better off at home.

The resemblance between the girls smooths out many of these obstacles. If James refused to obey his parents, and presented them with his choice, who was the complete opposite of who they had in mind, it'd be too jarring to tolerate. They'll have spent years imaging what it'll be like to have Jessibelle in the family and her giving them grandchildren.

If it's Jessie, then it's easier for Ma and Pa to accept. She fits into their dynastic fantasies to the snug level that an outsider might not notice the difference, and maybe they'd occasionally forget it hadn't all gone to plan.

As they want heirs, James has to be intended to find Jessibelle attractive, so they can't say they don't know what he sees in Jessie.

Much of her inner rage is probably frustration over failure and general unhappiness. If that's alleviated, she'd be far more laid-back, and so not so unsuitable to high society. Ma could offer a little instruction then.

The second thing is the events leading to this situation. Yes, James couldn't cope with marrying Jessibelle, and so, when away from home at Pokémon Tech., he ran off.

Before this, he encountered Jessie, as in a girl the exact image of the one he wanted to escape.

That meeting is an accidental twist of fate, and can't be helped, but to James it must've been the universe conspiring against him. He'd have believed it was Jessibelle initially.

If he hated his fiancée to the depths of his soul, every bit of her, he ought to have run for the hills. How could you stomach being around someone that similar to all you'd gone to the trouble to avoid?

Instead, he not only befriended Jessie, but stays beside her from that day. He joins the Bike Gang with her, enters Team Rocket with her, and walks over the world with her.

Every single day he has a reminder of Jessibelle before him. He absconded, but she's inescapable, and he decided to make it that way.

Why would this be?

It's as if, whatever he says to the contrary, he does like Jessibelle. He wanted to leave her behind, but not her face, and found himself a replica.

Somehow, Jessibelle telling him what to do was unreasonable, but he wanted her, without that element of control. He then found Jessie, who not only orders him about, but hits him, yet that's alright, as long as he has a certain level of freedom.

If he's in Jessie's company every minute of the day, he can't resent her appearance. In turn, that implies he likes it, and so he must fancy Jessibelle. If that's so, he has to also be attracted to Jessie.

The funny thing is that Rocketshipping and Rumishipping aren't rival ships, they're two sides of the same thing. If you support one, you must accept the other, else yours can't exist.

[guigz1-coldwar]

'Captured': New chapter for "Redemption in a Spirit in a Cold War" is out!

"Captured"

"I hope that you're not afraid of the dark, Grigoriev, you will get used to it!""

Chapter Summary: The mission with the SAS took a horrible turn when Yirina & Zasha got captured after the train crash and things aren't going to help them...

Link of the Picrew here!

To read it on AO3, click here!

Words : +3200

Taglist : @snowgoldwaylon , @clxudtea , @efingart

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

I tried to understand what happened in my mind but it all came so quickly that I wasn't able to process everything, the crash into the train, me trying to see if Zasha was okay...before getting knocked out by...Sarah...Sarah...her...she was kidnapped by Perseus and I saw her dressing in Stone's outfit...why? I couldn't understand and know why but they didn't let me breathe one second more, getting dragged over the floor and briefly seeing Zasha also getting taken over, her & some soldiers taking us away from the crash scene. My mouth wanted to open to scream, to call for help but it was hopeless, only whispering about it as my body was giving in, and what they injected me to take over and caused me to close my eyes...

Suddenly, I found myself back in my old apartment but instead of being on a couch or that seat, trying to relax, I was looking a bit running around to prepare things in the living room. The outfit I was wearing was my KGB uniform with the vest off along with the tie, keeping the green kaki buttoned shirt with a button away at the top of it while the pants were looking crumpled than in perfect, the black shoes not-so shiny but the most important here was the thing I was preparing than my own clothes.

I was moving between the living room and the kitchen, going to prepare the table and I only took 2 plates with two sets of covers, meaning that I was having a close dinner tonight by looking at the tile outside the windows of the kitchen and the living room. Right now, the only thing that I was unsure of...was about myself, mixed between been excited...or scared of the person's reaction that will come...must be very important if I'm like that, can't be like this if it's with friends...

While I was making another entrance in the kitchen, grabbing two glasses inside the kitchen drawer above the sink, I almost jump scared with the glasses in my both hands when I start to hear the phone in the living room ringing, causing me to come back inside the living room and putting the glasses on the table before going to grab the phone, picking it up in a fast motion, at a few seconds of the last ring.

"Yes?" I started, picking up the phone in my left hand.

"It's Zasha, your friend," The voice said, recognizing Zasha's perfect voice through the phone and it gave me a little smile in fact.

"Oh hey, Zed, how it's going?" I asked them with curiosity as I do.

"All fine, all fine," They replied with a good voice. "You're sounding a bit anxious in your voice, Yirina," They remarked, having used on my side the anxiety I was having right now.

"Yeah, I'm...dealing with something important here," I told them, taking a look at the front door of my apartment as if someone could knock at any moment. "A birthday," I chuckled.

"Oh?" I heard Zasha gasp through the phone, surprised by that.

"Freya's birthday," I clarified, moving the phone to hold it between my right ear and on the top of my right shoulder as I passed my hand over the dress the phone is, removing the dust on it.

"It's her birthday, today?" They whispered in a curious voice.

"Yes, the 29th of February and honestly, it's strange to organize something like that," I confessed, feeling the unneeded stress of the situation inside of me. "It's the first time doing that,"

"Really?"

"Always, she's not here for her birthday, away from me or it's Perseus himself doing it," I explained, taking the phone back into my hand, my eyes staying on the door. "And I'm telling you, Perseus ain't the best at organizing parties," I added with a funny tone to maybe destress a little.

"I'm sure of that, Yirina," They scoffed as if they knew how it was doing with Perseus. "So, like today, you're celebrating her birthday..." They muttered, their voice a bit

"Of course, for the only time she's here with not Perseus around us," I affirmed, smiling about it before something about Zasha's voice came to me in my head. "You...you needed me for something?" I demanded.

"Well...Uhm...I was planning if you wanted to get with me, Dedov & Portnova out of town, you know but as I heard, you have a birthday to do," They revealed to me, suddenly feeling bad for them.

"I'm sorry, Zasha, if I knew," I apologized to them about it but neither of us couldn't know of each other plans for the day.

"No, I should have known that," They said, sounding to take the blame on them but in fact, none of us should take it. "You don't have to apologize and...yeah, if you got the chance to be with Freya for her birthday, do it then," They exclaimed, sounding better in their voice, making me smile a little.

"If you want, we can do that another day," I proposed.

"As you wish," They told me before my door start to make some noises, meaning that someone was knocking on it.

"I think she's here, Zed," I supposed, my left hand getting away from the dresser to redress normally. "Listen, I have to go now, we'll talk later, okay?"

"Ok, I hope you'll have a good night, Yirina, bye," They declared.

"Bye, Zed," I breathed before I hang up the phone, taking a deep breath to get to the door but then, I stopped as if I forgot something. "Wait, two minutes," I ordered, going back on my track and going inside my bedroom.

I stepped inside of my bedroom and I went directly to kneel at the right side of my bed, my hands going under it to grab a present that was like a medium-sized box, sliding it to get it out of the bed, taking it with me out of the room before I put it on the small table in front of the couch, taking another deep breath, seconds before I joined up my front door, unlocking it and opening slowly to perceive Freya in front of me, civilians clothes &...wow...

"Wow..." I literally expressed my surprise when I saw Freya with a different haircut than before: a sort of mohawk one with no hair on the sides, all on the top as she got a braid behind her. "That's...you're looking cute," I said, almost speechless at her sight.

"Thanks," She blushed at my remark, passing her hand through her face to hide it. "So..." She started to look behind me.

"Wait, close your eyes," I demanded.

"You've got a surprise for me?" She asked even if she comply with my demand and close her eyes on her own before I took her softly by the arms.

"I did my best about everything so it's maybe not perfect," I commented, guiding her towards the couch and she was letting herself be guided away by me. "Here, sit," I whispered, putting her down on the couch.

"It's good, now?" She questioned me, keeping her eyes close as I move on the other side of the table, standing up.

"Open your eyes, it's okay," I told her and in a second, she got her eyes looking at me, standing up in front of her before she got them down on the table, seeing the present.

"That's for me?" She breathed, her mouth slightly opened, pointing at the present with her left hand.

"Go on, open it up," I suggested, gesturing towards the box before she got her hands on it, taking it over her lap as I was feeling a bit unsure of what I got in here for Freya, was she going to like it or not?

"Well, well, well, that's interesting," She proclaimed, taking out of the box a knife looking silver-plated, very shiny with a black whip. "Hunting knife?" She presumed.

"I know that you loved hunting with a shotgun as Perseus learned to us so...here's for you," I explained, scratching the back of my head, wondering to myself why did I offer a knife for a birthday...

"That's perfect, Yiri," She smiled at me, looking closely at the knife as she could see her reflection on the blade. "It's a great gift," She added to it, putting it down on the small table before her eyes went back inside the box. "What's this?" She muttered, grabbing something in her hands: a piece of paper... "To this day, Freya Helvig has been reinstated to..." She stopped herself, looking at me in shock and keeping the paper in her hands. "You...what did you do?"

"4 years ago, the NIS brandished you as a traitor to Norway and you didn't take it well," I started, trying to explain myself while having her eyes on me. "You're a patriot, Freya, you're...you're not doing all of this for the Collective but because you might think that Scandinavia can be hit in case of a war...and also because of me," I continued, joining my hands together as I go to sit next to her. "Thanks to Perseus & some contacts, we...managed to clear your records in the NIS and they're willing to take you back," I finished.

"You...you want me to...go back to the NIS?" She whispered, showing me the paper tells that her actions against the NIS were forgiven. "After...after what happened?"

"It's stupid, I know but...it can maybe allow you to...not getting involved so much in..." I was trying to say before she interrupted me by cuddling me, wrapping her arms around my shoulders.

"Thank you," She thanked me, giving me a kiss on the cheek as a surprise was the word that could describe my state right now. "Thank you," She repeated in a good & broken voice, reinforcing her softly hold on me, making me smile again before I decide to hug her too...

"Hey, watch out, we need her alive!" Suddenly, I was feeling extirpated from that dream with Freya as a muffled voice spoke up, my mind slowly awakening but my body wasn't following the same mood, my eyes' vision all blurred but I could only perceive that I was still on a wet dirty ground, the back of my head on it. I wanted to speak but I was so weak that no sound could go out for the moment before I start to get dragged on the ground. "I told you to get cautious, damn it," The voice repeated again.

"Not my fault if she and Krypto are fucking sleeping beauties," Another voice called the first one, sounding more like a man one and supposedly, one of the people dragging me as I could feel a hold on my left hand going away from me.

"Ain't my fault if you're the one who gives them the dose, Bellamy," Another man's voice stepped in, sounding with a german accent, holding me by my right hand as I couldn't react and move freely as if I was paralyzed. "They're going to be knock out for the night,"

"Knocked out? Really?" The first voice, getting clear for me, said to the second guy as I could see Sarah without a mask, still dressed in Stone's clothes going next to me. "She got her eyes opened, she's awakening," She stated.

"And Krypto?" The first man...Bellamy...asked, resuming to put his hands around my left wrist.

"Looks like they're still sleeping," A third man replied, my eyes trying to find him around and briefly seeing him inside a blue van...someone...Zasha laid down on the floor of it. "What should we do now?"

"What do you think, Lukas?" Bellamy sighed, reinforcing his hold on me to make sure that he was controlling me. "We got the two to their cells underground and we see what to do," He told them before his head turned around to look at the other man near me. "Come on, Beck, must be much easier than playing with explosives, isn't it?"

"Shut up, Bellamy, ain't funny," This Beck...this Ingo Beck sniffed before he complied, feeling my body moving away from the spot I awake as the two were dragging me inside a building...

My eyes were still slowly recovering, my vision blurred along the way and I couldn't identify anything that could help me to know where I am but...it was...for me...looking like a sort of warehouse but I couldn't really say a concrete thought, my state becoming a priority for me, the feeling of having fucked up and got me & Zasha captured...the others killed...by Perseus. I should cry but even here, my body was too weak, my state was in the same shape that even crying was impossible.

I tried to focus, thinking about things that could help me but it was hard, my face was hurting me, feeling some bruises & cut because of the train crash, my chest was in a big pain along with my face and it got worse when my body starts to go down some stairs, sometimes hearing this Beck arguing with Bellamy to be soft with me instead of going down like an asshole as he stated, should find it funny...but here...my situation...nothing was funny, I fucked up...Park wasn't here to save me...we're in an unknown place...

The two continued to drag me away until one of them open up a metal door, revealing a room whose walls were losing their paint, the place looking so old that the building could crash down on us, the ground not cleaned up...with dried up blood on the right corner of the room. Other than that, there was nothing in the room about comfort: no windows, no bed, no sink...nothing. An old light above the ceiling was in bad shape according to the building and it's in the middle of the room that the two dropped me.

"Your new place to live, Grigoriev," I hear Bellamy talk to me after he released me, my back against the ground, looking up at the ceiling and avoiding the light as I try to cover my eyes from it with my hand only with a slower pace. "See, they'll be sleeping the night," He scoffed, looking at Beck and taking back his words.

"Hey, I'm not into that drug bullshit, you do," Beck protested, turning around to look at Bellamy. "I was just presuming," He added.

"Like you were before your accident years ago?" Bellamy told him, crossing his arms at him as my eyes start to have better sight and a better view of the two. Beck...he was having a black leather jacket and some glasses while Bellamy...he was having a tactical military outfit still on him, the two facing each other without a word before Beck got his eyes away from him. "You can leave now," He ordered.

"What about her?" Beck demanded.

"Let me with her, Sarah & Lukas will be busy to get Zasha up, you should join them if you want," He ordered in a clear voice, his eyes staying on Beck as he gestured at him with his head to get outside.

"As you want," Beck sighed, taking a look at me and seeing me like this, not having an expression on his face before he walked away from the cell, keeping the cell's door open.

"Grigoriev, Grigoriev, Grigoriev," Bellamy turned his body to look at me, repeating my name three times as I was trying to gather a few of my strength to redress myself away from the middle of the room. "What the odds for us that you'll be the one to take the bait," He announced, slowly moving my hands on the ground to get my back off the ground.

"Fuck...you..." It was the first words I could say, sounding low in my voice, taking some deep breaths to stay up & better. "Bellamy, just...go fuck yourself," I repeated, my head looking down, seeing the state of the blue uniform I was still wearing, some cuts on the sleeves and on the legs part.

"Not the best thought & words to have now," He stated as he walk next to me, not removing his eyes from me, managing during that to get my back against the wall, sitting against it on the ground. "You're not in the position to say to me go fuck myself," He added, kneeling next to me on one knee.

"What should I....should I say?" I said, looking up at him, my hands on the side of my legs, my eyes narrowing slowly as if the envy of sleeping was going to take over me. "You tried to kill my friend...ain't going to be nice with you," I reminded him, remembering the day he tried to kill Portnova at the university.

"I didn't know that she was alive but now, not only her but also Krypto themselves," Bellamy pointed out at this detail before I could hear a scream outside the cell...a loud scream that send me chills inside my body...

"STOP...LET ME GO!" That's what I heard...Zasha's voice...screaming..."STOP...YIRI..." It continued before I hear a door getting hardly slammed, cutting the screams...

"Zasha..." I whispered, getting stress flowing inside of me and trying to move away before Bellamy put his hand over my chest, stopping me to try to move.

"Heard that?" He scoffed, keeping a smile on his face. "Ain't that our Krypto screaming for their girlfriend?" He supposed, looking ready to laugh at my face about it. "Stupid, pathetic...fucking Krypto," He added before with some of my strength, I managed to gather some blood that I was still having in my mouth to spit it right on his face, hitting him right between the eyes & the nose. "FUCK!"

"Ain't that...funny...you son of a bitch," I cursed, looking at him going up from his spot to get in the middle of the room, cleaning up the blood on his face with his hands.

"You bitch, you're just a bitch," He yelled at me, turning his head at me as he clenches his fists, ready to land a punch at me, seeing his fingers getting ready before he stops clenching them. "No...ain't going to hit little shit like you," He declared, starting to walk away from me to reach the door. "And besides, we all going to have some fun to torture you & Zasha during the following days, I'm not going to break the other's pleasure," He announced as he got out of the room, keeping his eyes on me as the light inside the cell goes off, only seeing him with the light of the hallway behind him, me staying at my spot. "I hope you're not afraid of the dark, Grigoriev, you'll be used to it," He proclaimed before he shut down the door, finding himself in the complete darkness.

I could move in the room but no light could guide me here, nothing could show me the way, there was no bed in here and the floor...is supposed to be my bed...I should...I should not...I'm scared...I fucked up and now, I'm in a cell, wearing a badly shaped SAS uniform, my body exhausted and wanting to scream its pain away as I manage to lay down on my side on the ground, trying to think of something positive: good moments, Zasha, Portnova, Park...shit...I fucked up...it's because of me we're here now...I feel so bad...Park...I'm sorry...

I fucked up...Park...I'm fucking stupid...Help me...Help us...