#Vince also wants to learn guitar. I am learning guitar.

[sweet-as-kiwis]

And so the Great Instrument Swap begins

[vincess-princess]

in darkness shall you be reborn

Chapter 15

Word count: 2789 Warnings: some blood A/N: rejoice, for i am almost done with college (for this semester) and have much more time and energy, hence this chapter. consider it a christmas present <3

By the time the potato fortress was demolished, the bandage on Vince’s shoulder had grown soggy and heavy, and underneath dumb pain accompanied every Vince’s movement, occasionally sharpening into spikes. When Mick turned away to fiddle with the pot on the stove, Vince unbuttoned his shirt and peeled off the three-day-old bandage.

The wound didn’t look promising, with the skin between the stitches red and inflamed, and the thread dark and wet with blood. If it had been healing, the process surely was disrupted. This really begged for a doctor, but he had just refused to do that to Mick’s face, so going to a surgeon would mean admitting defeat, and Vince had enough of it today. Besides, while death of infection wasn’t among the ways to kill himself that he considered, but for lack of alternatives…

A hand grasped his forearm, startling him. The bandage fell onto the ground with an audible plop. Not paying that any mind, Mick silently dragged him to the door and then along the corridor to the sick bay. Vince didn’t resist. It made sense with Nikki. Not with Mick.

Izzy the surgeon wasn’t alone. A familiar redhead was sitting on the bunk in the sick bay and sipping beer from a mug. There was a talk in hushed voices going on, but it was, naturally, stopped as Mick barged in without a knock and unceremoniously shoved Vince inside.

“Take care of this idiot before I do,” he only said and, not sparing Vince another look, slammed the door shut.

“Wow.” Axl raised an eyebrow. “Never seen the old man so pissed. What did you do, hump his guitar?”

“I wish,” Vince jerked his shoulder, annoyed, but then the pain in it flared up, making him wince. Izzy the surgeon frowned, and Vince belatedly remembered he wasn’t supposed to disclose his and Axl’s connection to anyone on the ship. Well, that one reply didn’t mean anything, right?

“You got him so angry and didn’t even use the chance to hump his guitar?” Axl continued, making Izzy snort. That was the first time Vince heard him make a sound since he dryly informed him about that same shoulder wound during his first visit to sick bay.

“You seem unhealthily fixated on it, should I tell Mick to lock it up at night?” Vince replied half-mindedly, eyeing the surgeon nervously. Stopping in the middle of a conversation now would seem stranger than continuing it. Izzy, however, observed the battle of wits with no sign of surprise. No sign of anything, really. It was hard to see his eyes at all underneath the long, greasy hair and in the dim light of the sick bay.

“Oh, so he doesn’t lock her up?” Axl grinned. “Pray tell, where does he keep her?”

“Whatever you’re thinking of, I wouldn’t recommend it. You try to cross the galley’s threshold at night, you’re getting an early breakfast. Of lead.”

“Really? Does he also shoot at you when you go out for a piss?”

Vince nodded. He might have exaggerated Mick’s reaction a bit, to keep any night eaters’ hopes low. Just a bit, though, because anyone breaking down the closed door at night was guaranteed a couple extra holes.

“Oh you poor thing, can’t even go take a leak?” Axl didn’t sound too pitiful, more amused, and that felt good.

“Oh, I can. You don’t want to know where, though.”

“Ew-w-w!” Even Izzy couldn’t hold back a cry of disgust. Vince took it as his little personal victory. He had already learned that the reaction to this type of humor was deceptive. If the pirates didn’t love the joke, they wouldn’t say anything at all, and that silence could kill faster than staying in the same room with a dozen pirates who had beans for dinner. “Yeah, I’ll think twice before eating anything from the galley now.”

“Think as much as you want, you’ll eat it anyway. May I?” Without waiting for an answer, Vince reached out for Axl’s unfinished mug of beer and finished it off in two gulps. Watching Axl’s jaw loosen in indignation was quite entertaining. And reassuring, because whatever Nikki had said, those two treated him rather decently so far, even when he obviously overstepped the boundaries.

“You recovered rather quickly,” another voice said from behind Vince’s back. Izzy. “Surprising.”

“Really?” Vince abruptly turned on his heels towards Izzy. His face gave no indication of whether the last comment was meant positively or negatively, but Vince had a feeling that if it was the latter, the surgeon wouldn’t initiate the talk at all. “Why?”

“Well,” one corner of Izzy’s mouth curved ever so slightly, “last time you were here, you were trembling like a leaf and couldn’t string two words together. I didn’t expect you’d last the night.”

Not a muscle had moved in the surgeon’s face, but he tilted his head to the left slightly… it might have been the dim light of the sick bay and the shadows of Izzy’s hair falling on his face, but the nothingness of his face had an ironic undertone now.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“Well, you were rather… distraught. You lost everything you had, including your vir… dignity. You don’t look the hardy type to me, and that would be the easiest way out.”

“Well, it wasn’t,” Vince said in a strangled voice. “If I die, I die of this infection that Mick dragged me here for. Stop talking nonsense and deal with it instead.”

“Hey, drop that tone,” Axl demanded, his voice suddenly stern. “Order your servants around with it- oh right, you don’t have any. Nobody owes you anything anymore.”

“Ax, relax,” Izzy said lazily, rising from his chair. “Old habits slip through in everyone sometimes. You, for example, still can’t take a shit when there’s someone else on the poop deck, and captain still expects us to know what minuet is. Shirt off.” That last one was addressed to Vince, who hastily pulled his shirt over his head. Izzy grabbed a candle and leaned forward, examining the wound, the candle so close Vince could feel the heat with his skin. He sure hoped Izzy’s hand wouldn’t slip.

“Let’s see… Haven’t I fixed it before? Yeah, those are my stitches… holy shit. It takes an effort to fuck up my work this badly. What you been doing with them?”

“Not me,” Vince said gloomily.

“Ah.” No emotion on the pale face once again. It contrasted especially starkly with Axl’s grimace on the background. “Well, tell the captain that if he keeps that up, he might lose his favorite whipping boy in a couple of months at best. This one looks fixable, but if they add up it’s gonna get real bad.”

“If I tell him that, it will take much less than a couple months.” Vince much preferred when they discussed his night pissing accommodations.

“C’mon, it’s not in his interest. It’s not like you can find pretty captives on every ship you raid. It was three years between you and Axl. Pretty boys don’t usually go seafaring – for obvious reasons.”

“But Axl said-“ Vince turned to the redhead, then caught himself. Izzy seemed aware, but to what extent?

“Yeah, he got luckier than you. Doesn’t mean that wasn’t one of the reasons,” Izzy interrupted him. Ah, so he was fully aware. Interesting that Axl didn’t consider it worthwhile to tell him about their little club. “Ax, get off the bunk. I’m gonna have to stitch him anew. Here, lie down.”

He pressed on Vince’s shoulder, pushing him to lie onto his back, then opened a cabinet and extracted a bottle of water out of it and a surgeon’s kit.

“Hold this.” He handed Vince the water. As Vince discovered three seconds later, it was actually vodka. A shitty painkiller, but better than nothing.

“Hey!” Izzy caught Vince red-handed sipping out of the bottle. “You parasite! That’s for medical purposes. Give that to me.”

“I’m self-medicating!” Vince protested, reluctantly handing back the bottle. The only upside of vodka was that it didn’t take much of it to get piss drunk, though, so he wasn’t too upset about the loss.

“For external use!”

“Why? If you want to clean the wound with it, why not just use water? And I could find a better use for this heavenly beverage.”

“Are you telling me how to do my job? Maybe you’ll patch yourself up too then and save everyone the trouble?” Izzy gave Vince a blank stare that impressed him more than any frown Axl could master. “No? Then don’t act all smart here. Stretch out the arm.”

He got down onto his knees next to the bunk and leaned close to the wound, carefully stretching the skin a little to get a better look at it. Then he cut the thread with small scissors and abruptly pulled it out.

“Ouch!”

“Don’t be such a pussy,” Izzy rolled his eyes. “At least, not more than you already are.”

Vince wouldn’t have swallowed the insult so meekly if the surgeon wasn’t just about the only person capable of fixing his wound. Without the thread the torn edges of the wound widened, exposing black, clotted blood inside. Vince winced.

“Could be worse,” Izzy waved him off. “It just started to inflame. I don’t see any pus there so far.” Then he pulled out a patch of fabric and the aforementioned vodka bottle and, before Vince managed to realise what was happening, poured vodka all over it.

A second passed, and then Vince threw his head back with a howl as the liquid burned exposed flesh and the skin around it. Izzy promptly pressed the fabric to the wound, pushing Vince back onto the bunk, and held him down as he cursed and hissed. Then he began cleaning out the dried blood with the cloth, and Vince discovered he knew even more curse words than he thought. Thankfully, he did the job quickly enough for Vince to only cycle through his collection of curses three times.

“This should be a torture technique!” he protested once he was again capable of coherent speech. “Wouldn’t water do the job just as well?”

“No.” Izzy threw the bloody cloth on the floor. “Over my years of practice I discovered that the wounds cleaned with vodka or other highly alcoholic beverages have much lower chance of inflaming. And you need that chance. I can’t really chop off a shoulder in case there’s a gangrene.”

Vince, realizing this was a real possibility, went quiet. Izzy, meanwhile, grabbed a needle, threaded it and then dipped it into the flame of the candle. For a second Vince believed the thread would catch fire, but Izzy knew what he was doing. After a couple minutes of this he removed it, tried to touch it with his fingers, cursed under his breath and blew onto the blunt tip. When it presumably cooled enough, he grabbed the needle and lowered himself onto a stool next to the bed.

“Now hold still. You fidget too much, I’ll have to ask Axl to pin you down.”

“You don’t want that,” Axl, who until now had been observing the scene with an interest one would express to a circus performance, confirmed from the back.

“Aren’t you going to wait until the needle cools down?” Vince asked warily.

“No. It will hurt anyway.” With that, Izzy began to stitch.

The stab wound was small and only took him a few minutes to stitch up, but to Vince they were hours. He gripped the edge of the bed so tightly his fingers went numb, and bit his lips so hard he drew blood. But, for the first time on the Shout, the pain was inflicted without a purpose to hurt, and so he kept silent, save for an occasional pained gasp.

“All done.” Izzy rose from his stool and wiped his bloody fingers and the needle with a towel. “And you didn’t have to be all tough and manly about it. Crying actually helps relieve the pain.”

“Yeah, so you get more excuses to call me a pussy?” Vince huffed, sitting up on the bunk and putting his feet onto the floor. His bloodied knees poked out of his pants, drawing a disproportionate amount of attention.

“Whoa, man,” Axl whistled in amazement, “you seen his knees? To fucking shreds! The blowjob must have been insane.”

Izzy raised his eyebrows. “Huh. The captain sure doesn’t fuck around. You might want to get these cleaned and bandaged, though.”

“I might, if you two stop talking bollocks,” Vince said through gritted teeth.

“That’s only in your interest,” Izzy shrugged, wetting a cloth with vodka and handing it to him. “These can get infected too.”

“I- ouch!- know.” Vince dabbed the cloth onto one knee, then another. He didn’t even have to take off his pants for that, which was convenient.

“Any other injuries I should know about?”

“None that I recall,” Vince said curtly.

“Man, if that’s just his knees, imagine what the captain is doing to his ass,” Axl said from behind Izzy’s back. “Maybe he’s just too shy to ask you about it.”

“If you don’t shut up, I will do something much worse to your ass,” Vince promised.

“Oh-oh, so scary.” Axl threw his hands up in pretended surrender, but had to cut the act short to dodge from the candle holder Vince hurled at him. He promptly picked it up to throw it back, but Izzy was quicker.

“Stop that right now!” He snatched the candle holder from Axl’s hand. “I won’t tolerate a mess in my workplace!” For the first time Vince heard an actual emotion in his voice – anger. “Rose, get the hell out!”

“Hey! He started that!” Axl protested.

“I don’t care. He needs my services, and you’re here just to gawk. Get out or I’ll make you.” The surgeon was thinner and lighter than Axl, but Vince didn’t doubt for a second that he could easily do that. Axl seemed to be of the same opinion, because he got up and disappeared behind the door, muttering indignantly under his breath.

“You done?” Izzy turned back to Vince like nothing happened and crouched next to the bunk to look at his knees. “Well, you certainly didn’t try your hardest. Gimme.”

He quickly and relentlessly wiped up the rest of the clotted blood off Vince’s knees and bandaged them.

“Try not to kneel much in the next few days. Even if the captain wants you to. Tell him I said so.”

“I will make sure to pass your recommendations on to him,” Vince promised grimly. “After which he, in turn, will make sure to break every single one of them. Thanks for the help. Drop by the galley when you can. I don’t have much influence over Mick, but I can coax an extra mug of beer out of him for you.”

“You sure know your strengths.” Izzy smiled with corners of his mouth. “I’ll consider it. Now off you go.”

Well, out of all of “get the fuck out of here” variations this one was rather polite. Vince, not wishing to test Izzy’s patience any longer, left the sick bay and almost bumped into Axl, who was waiting patiently by the door.

“You could have told me that Izzy knows about us before I had to find it out by trial and error!” Vince poked him in the chest accusingly.

“Well, it didn’t end in error after all, right?” Axl waved his hand carelessly. “Besides, I wanted to see how you’d hold up in the presence of another person. I gotta say, I thought you had better manners.”

“Learning from you all,” Vince grumbled. “Anyone else aware you haven’t told me about?”

“Nope. Izzy’s the only one on this ship I can trust.” Axl sighed.

“Three years, and you’ve only made one friend? You’re not a social type, aren’t you?”

“I’ll look at you in three years and see how you’re faring,” Axl scowled. “If you’re still alive, that is. The captain sure is hot-headed, but within reason. You must be a terrible pain in the ass to end up so beaten.”

“I’m not-“ Vince began, but realized anything he said would be taken as proof of that. A pain in the ass, a bother, an annoyance. None of the pirates would ever see past this description, would never believe it wasn’t his fault. They believed their precious captain would never do that on his own volition, and together with general disregard of the “blue bloods” it was enough for them to shift the blame completely onto Vince’s shoulders.

He gave Axl a deadly glare and stormed down the corridor to the galley.

[genocidalfetus]

Wicked Game

Wrote this because the sad from losing my cat had to be turned into something else. It's a lead-in to my Post-Sun-Ending fic I'll be posting once it's complete. I'll also be posting this to ao3 at some point but figured I'd let y'all read it first.

Kerry didn't even want to go to the party at Bess' place. A strange thing, considering Kerry's profession and his normal need to be social, to mingle. Or maybe that was his 'old normal'. These days, Kerry was more content with staying at home, either writing more music or laying down new tracks for the album. Or just sitting on the couch watching some shitty sitcom, wishing the empty spot next to him wasn't so damn empty.

Kerry put on his favorite vest, then checked himself out in the mirror. His eyeliner was on point, his hair flawlessly styled as usual. He sighed and shook his head though.

"Why am I doing this again?" He asked himself out loud.

He could almost hear Vince's reply.

Because you know as well as I do that moping here ain't gonna do you any good, Vince would have told him, if he were there and not somewhere in space.

"But going to a party and getting loaded is gonna do me good?"

He once again could imagine how Vince would reply to such a question. The two of them so close, so in-tune with one another.

You know you ain't gonna get loaded. You probably won't even stay that long. But you need a distraction. So go, enjoy yourself. Don't shut yourself off from people again, Ker. Don't need you regressing back to the state of mind I found you in. You've come so far. I'll be home before you miss me.

Kerry sighed and rolled his eyes, smirking at himself in the mirror. "Fine. I'll go. For you. K?"

The party was pretty low-key. A bunch of Bess' journalist friends, but Denny was there too, as were some other musicians. Kerry found himself mingling among his fellow music makers, as he found most journalists to be boring and he was suspicious of their intentions when talking to him. The musicians hung out in the living room, on the leather couch. Kerry talked shop with them and gave a little insight into his latest album, but mostly he listened. Or at least tried to. Found his mind wandering here and there. And it always wandered to the same place. The same man, the one who was billions of miles away, up in orbit about to do something for some shady guy who may not even be trustworthy, to begin with. Fuck.

An elbow in his rib from Denny brought Kerry away from his thoughts and back to the party. She motioned him to look ahead with her neck. He saw Bess standing there with a guitar in her hands. It was an acoustic guitar and one that Kerry remembered all too well. One of his old ones from back in Samurai's earlier days. He never played with it on the stage, but he used it for writing songs here and there. He recalled selling it to some collector a few years after they got bigger. Bess handed it off to him. "Look familiar?" Bess mused with a smirk.

Kerry was wearing a grin as he looked the instrument over, turning it about in his hands. He looked up at Bess. "Where'd you find this relic?" He asked.

Bess shrugged. "Some collector died and it was among his things at an estate sale. Figured I'd bring it back to its original owner."

Kerry raised an eyebrow. "For real?"

She nodded. "This relic helped you get to where you are today. Deserves to be displayed with your other axes, don't you think?"

Kerry positioned the guitar on his lap. He gave it a strum, frowned, and then tuned the strings individually, his hearing cyberware helping tremendously. The guitar was now perfectly tuned. Kerry looked around at the musicians with a smirk. "Any requests?"

"Still remember Wicked Game?" Bess piped up.

Kerry chuckled and rolled his eyes. He learned how to play that song for Bess back when she went by Nance, after she hounded him for a whole month to do it. She tried to get Johnny to do it, but he was far more stubborn than Kerry and she knew it. Why she loved that song so much, Kerry would never know, but Bess had some very odd taste in music. He thought for a moment, then reached over to the coffee table and picked up the drink he'd been nursing, finishing it off with a big gulp, wincing as the whiskey warmed his throat up good. He put his fingers on the frets, then started strumming, the intro to Chris Isaak's song echoing off the walls, causing lingering conversations to pause. And Kerry now realized that he had an audience, and he smiled and started to croon the lyrics.

World was on fire and no one could save me but you. Strange what desire can make foolish people do….

And Kerry began to see flames dancing all around them and he was back in Kovachek's yacht. Vince was in front of him, legs spread as he sat up on the top of one of the couches. Kerry standing on top of the couch, fucking him, his hand on the back of Vince's neck. The other man's expression that of elation, desire before a playful slap stung Kerry's face.

And I never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you, and I never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you…

Seeing Vince for the first time, in control of his body. Kerry recalled the kid's eyes. When Johnny had been in control, Vince's eyes were dull and darker. When he woke up after collapsing on the floor, his eyes were bright and young, the emerald green emitting a friendlier aura within them. Those emerald eyes showing confidence but a little sadness when Kerry looked into them before Vince got into the Del cab and went off to do what he needed to do.

And I don't wanna fall in love….And I don't wanna fall in love….with you…

Too fucking late for that, Kerry thought as he played. He was in love. And he was worried about Vince, even though he knew Vince was resourceful and smart and tough as all hell. He kept strumming and then went into the next verse.

What a wicked game you play, to make me feel this way. What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you…

His drive home from the Samurai concert, thinking about Vince and how he might have done the wrong thing just leaving him there like that. Their first official coffee date, where they talked until closing at Caliente's. Kerry realizing that these feelings were not going away anytime soon. Going for the kiss at his place after breaking the kid's nose. An emotional mess began to stir within Kerry. He was feeling everything. Happiness at being able to move on from Johnny, but the bitterness of knowing Vince was still sick, and he wasn't within reach, and the fear of him not coming back at all due to some unforseen circumstances. His throat felt like it was getting smaller, but his hands never faltered on the instrument and he didn't miss a note. As he sang, his voice became louder, more full of emotion.

What a wicked thing to say, you never felt that way. What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you…

Sitting with Vince after their first time together, after Vince's first time with anyone. Hands interlaced, Vince's head on his shoulder. Then and there, Kerry knew he had found someone worth staying around for and someone who was different, someone who just made him want to do better and be better. Kerry's voice got a little softer as he sang the chorus. He could feel so many eyes on him and as much as he loved performing, he almost wished they would stop paying attention to him. And yet, the show must go on and so it did. He repeated the first verse again, feeling his throat becoming more restricted but that only made him sing with more ferocity. He needed to finish the song, to conclude the performance, even if his heart was feeling heavier by the second. All he wanted was for Vince to be home again, back in his arms again. Safe and unharmed. His fingers were aching from pressing on the strings so hard, but he kept playing. Then he felt the tingling sensation before tears start to form in your eyes. He was at the end of the song.

Nobody. Loves No one.

The journalists and the musicians all clapped as the final notes of the guitar echoed through the living room. Kerry nodded, feeling the tears begin to climb into his eyes. He handed the guitar off to Denny and excused himself from the couch. He walked quickly and found the sliding door that led to the balcony, pulled it open, and stepped outside. The air outdoors was no better than the air inside, but it was less constricting. He took a breath and approached the railing, leaning against his elbows as he looked up at the stars, his eyesight briefly blurred by tears that he blinked away and freed. They slithered down his cheeks. His heart felt like it was about to drop from his body, feeling heavier than the densest material known to man. He was really missing Vince this evening. He lowered his head and heard the sliding door open and then close, a pair of soft footsteps coming towards him. Bess settled next to him. She looked up at the stars.

"You miss him don't you," Bess asked, then looked over at Kerry. "That merc of yours?"

Kerry nodded, fresh tears falling down his face. He sniffled. "He ain't been gone that long and yet it feels like it's been a month. Pretty fucking pathetic, right? An old man like me pining for his younger mainline like this?"

Bess lit up a cigarette and blew out a plume of smoke. "Well, at least you're no longer holding a candle for some gonk who was never going to return your feelings. Thought you would never get over Johnny. I'm glad you have, and I'm glad you found someone who's just as crazy about you as you are about him."

Kerry sighed as he wiped his face on his forearm. "Just want him back home. Been trying to keep busy, but during those times when there's a lul…sucks. Badly."

Bess sighed and nodded as she rubbed her shoulder against Kerry's. "V will be fine. He's one of the best mercs in all of Night City. At least that's what I've been told by countless people as of late."

"He's Night City's bad boy," Kerry mused with a smirk. "And he's all mine."

"Come on back to the party."

Kerry yawned and shook his head. "Actually, think I'll delta. Kind of feeling wiped out."

Bess smirked. "You really have gotten old, haven't ya?"

"Fuck off Bess," Kerry growled, but then laughed. "Can still keep up with the twenty-somethings in this city."

Bess shook her head, but gave Kerry a hug and a kiss on his cheek before returning to the party. Kerry lingered for a moment longer on the balcony. He took another glance up at the sky and smiled. Vince always told him that star-gazing was something they ought to do more often together. Perhaps once he gets home, they will. The stars were more visible at Kerry's villa, which would mean weekend trips back there. And maybe, just maybe, Kerry would endure the badlands for a whole weekend. Fuck, he definitely would if Vince asked.

Kerry left the party quietly grabbing his re-acquired guitar, and drove home. He got into the big and quiet penthouse and placed his acoustic guitar in the studio, then stripped down and got into the shower. He just stood there, under the hot steamy water, letting his mind wander. He really despised showering alone, especially now. He sighed with annoyance at his predicament and washed, then turned off the water and grabbed a towel from the rack, drying himself off and getting into bed naked, the blanket on top of his lower body. He closed his eyes, but sleep did not claim him. He rolled onto his side and tried again with diminishing results. The other side was less successful. Kerry balled his hands into fists and slammed them on the mattress, growling in frustration. He sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed, and grabbed his phone from the nightstand, checking the time. Three in the morning. Fuck. He sadly grinned at the lock screen on his phone. Vince, giving him a smirk and laying on his stomach on their bed, very much naked. One of the many sexy pics Kerry had of him that he rotated for his lock screen every couple of weeks. He unlocked his phone and pressed the icon for Vince's phone and waited. It rang. And rang. And rang again. Kerry's heart lurched as it went to voicemail. But he decided he needed to get things off his chest, so he started talking.

"Hey Vince," He said, trying to keep his voice steady. "It's three in the goddamn morning and I can't sleep so thought I'd…thought I'd give you a call, even if I have to ramble to your fuckin voicemail."

Kerry could feel the emotional lump in his throat begining to rise. He sighed and tried to swallow it down. "I know you said you'd be home before I could miss you," Kerry uttered a weak chuckle. "Well, I think you failed in your mission cuz…Fuck…Babe, this is hard as shit right now…I can't--"

He stopped himself for a moment as his voice began to tremble and large tears fell down his face. He wiped them away and cleared his throat.

"Just…just get back here in one piece..please," Kerry begged as a few sobs slipped out of his throat. "I…I love you…Never forget that…fuck…I'm gonna hang up now. I love you Vince."

With a shaking hand, Kerry ended the call. And wept.

[seconddoubt]

okay first off you convinced me to make a last.fm account (i’m Jack_Celliers there…)

second dumbass me not giving you anything solid to work with 😂. SO!!! i know you like depeche mode, why not give me your top recommendations for them!?!?

and/or a playlist that evokes the odd melancholic feeling of longing for something you never had in the first place

ok so by saying Depeche Mode you opened pandora's box, i've been waiting since 2017 to infodump about them (everyone i know are either already too into them for me to add anything, or they're not interested). I cannot just list a few songs I like from them, I made you a playlist of uhm, 62 songs. And this wall of text. But let's back it up.

I am not exaggerating when I say they saved my life. And it all started when some random dude in some random fb group I was in made a post that was like "the vibe in here has NOT been it lately, let's all listen to this and love one another" and it was a link to this performance of Somebody:

I still cannot watch this particular performance without crying, so there.

When they started out they were made up of Martin Gore (he is the singer in the above clip), Andrew Fletcher, lead singer Dave Gahan, and Vince Clarke, who was the "leader" and the songwriter of the group, he is more famous for Erasure and Yazoo, and while I love those groups, he was not a fit for DM (even though he made them), the first album is basically a different band from the following, it's like, Vince Clarke and The Boys. and in my opinion the only song you need from that one is this "Hey you're such a pretty boy!" :

so after that Vince left, Mart had to learn how to write songs, they also recruited Alan Wilder to fill the empty slot. Their second album is a little shaky, Mart is finding his wings but it has a few gems, there are two songs from there on the playlist.

To write a Martin Gore tune you need a cool synth bass line, hit some metal with some hammers and sing about pain, suffering and anti-capitalism, all cloaked in sexual themes. They were at the start synth purists, and were proud of not using "old" instruments, but Mart wrote all the songs by guitar and eventually, around Music For The Masses ('87) they accepted that they were limiting themselves by refusing to use it.

Another thing I feel the need to add is that by Songs of Faith and Devotion ('93) Martin was an alcoholic, probably Fletch too, and Dave was deep into a Heroin addiction that almost got him killed. He, as well as the others, thought it was going to be his last record, and thus he felt a strong need to make it perfect and iirc (mind you the hyperfixation was back in 2017) he felt especially that he put it all in his singing for Condemnation, so I want you to look out for that one when it comes on, because his vocal performance really isoutstanding there. After this album Alan was fed up, the guys were hard to work with, and he was basically the only one who did studio work and had probably the most hand in what the songs actually sounded like in the end, even though Mart got all the writing credits.

From Delta Machine (2013) forward Dave has also contributed to writing songs.

So onto the playlist, DM has made several cool Music Videos, and I feel a lot of these are mandatory viewings, I am especially in favour of their early ones, as they really are like concentrated 80's essence, they are so fun, so, the first 17 tracks of the playlist I highly recommend watching the mvs for, so I put together a handy YT-playlist with those here.

The playlist is a mix of their biggest hits, some songs I think you might appreciate specifically as a Bowie fan and also some of my personal favourites, actually probably too many of those last ones.

If you are curious to further explore them after this I'd recommend focusing on their albums between Construction Time Again ('83) through Playing the Angel ('05) + Spirit from 2017. Might be a good thing to know that Violator is most often lauded as their masterpiece album, and for good reason, so that's probably the best place to start. My personal favourites are Some Great Reward, Black Celebration (!!) and Exciter.

[inkabelledesigns]

Sam and Jan’s Apartment - Nightmares are Reality Sims

So as of late, I’ve had a LOT of ideas brewing for yet another Bendy fic, and in some of my planning for it, I’ve built one of the locations in the Sims 4 to use as reference. It’s been busy at home, and I needed this to relax, so I’m glad I took the time to do that briefly. You may have seen my previous post about Nightmares are Reality, but if you haven’t, here’s the short version: Samantha Lorenzo from 2021 and Sammy Lawrence from 1946 wake up one morning with their bodies switched, and now both have to embrace the other’s friend group to not only find a way to get back, but also stop the inevitable fate of the studio staff as shown in the novel Dreams Come to Life. There’s angst, there’s fluff, and it get pretty rough, but there’s so much to play with for this story. 

Come with me, and let’s dive into Sam and Jan’s apartment!

So first, we gotta talk about Sam and Jan themselves. Samantha is the curly haired one, and Janet is the one in the hat (she wouldn’t be caught dead without one). Unfortunately the Sims does not allow me to change heights (and I don’t have a mod for it), but imagine for me if you will that Jan is significantly shorter than Sam. I did not have a ton in mind in the way of colors for them, but together their wardrobes have a LOT of red and black, with a little white and tan thrown in. I have Sam with the lifetime goal of being a successful author, which falls in line with her love of storytelling in modern media. Jan on the other hand is a songwriter and musician that’s still trying to find her path. The two met in college and graduated not too long ago, and now they’re both hunting for work (which Janet has part time when the fic begins). 

In addition to them, we have their cat, Figaro (named after the cat from Disney’s Pinnochio, Sam is a nerd like that).

Now, we move onto their apartment!

I chose the 1020 Alto Apartments lot for this, which came with the condition of the Romantic Fireplace that I can’t remove. But I added on Home Studio and Great Acoustics so they could bump up their skills a little easier. This is my first time playing with a lot challenge, and that is Spooky, which makes it so ghosts will come over now and again, which scares the crap out of both of them. And uh, funny story...

The ghost of Joey Drew was the third one to come, and he was VERY angry when Sam met him. X’’’D I did not see that coming, but now I kinda want to make more Bendy ghosts just to see if they pop in. Would you guys be into that? I mean Depths Henry is a ghost, so I probably SHOULD make him. 

At any rate, let’s look at the layout. Bear in mind, I am not phenomenal at building houses, much less apartments, but I think this worked out. 

It opens up into the kitchen, which is filled with all the essentials (these ladies are big on their caffeine). Currently I headcanon that Sam cooks while Jan cleans, but Jan is the better baker out of the two of them. Sam also likes to have fresh ingredients, and while I can’t do a window box on this lot, I can have some indoor vertical plants.

There isn’t much of a separation between living room and kitchen, but this is the living room! Some stuff is for playing with (since I actually play with my households now and then), like the dancefloor, but others are for actual use. They use a record player to listen to jazz and other music, and the furniture would be all mismatched like that (they were broke college kids, gotta sit on something, right? probably got it from a bunch of garage sales). The photo setup is something they use, but it belongs to their friend Vincent, which brings me to the first bedroom.

I haven’t made these two as Sims yet, but Sam and Jan have another duo living with them, Jess and Vincent, who are a couple. Jess is a makeup artist who often experiments on her friends, and she hopes to get into the makeup and wardrobe side of the cinematography scene. Vince on the other hand is a photography and film guy who’s an absolute sweetheart. Those two share this bedroom (Jess had more of a say in the decorating, Vince is pretty easygoing about the aesthetic). 

I had to make sure there was a special corner for Jess’ makeup stuff, she’d want space to move around. The mirror is also something she loves, and they all borrow it a lot. Why?

Because of this creepy room nextdoor! X’’’D So I just learned mannequins are a thing, and I can dress them however I want, so I put some in this pretty much functionless closet. (Though the two masculine ones have been glitching in a way that turns their heads a little at certain angles, and it creeps me out a LOT) This is the cosplay closet, which mostly Jess and Sam use, but all four of them have some numbers in here. These four are a cosplay group, mostly for Bendy, but for other fandoms too. Jess likes going as Twisted Alice (heavy special effects makeup, go figure), Vincent likes Henry and Joey (he likes scruffy nerds and suits), Janet dresses as Jack Fain (though she’s also done some gender bends of other characters), and Samantha (as I’m sure you’ve guessed by now) is right there as the Sammy for their group. If I can ever learn how to work with custom content, I would love to have a cosplay for each of them on these mannequins, but we’ll save that for later. These nerds are absolutely the types to play around with cosplay photos and tiktok videos, I’m sure they duet often. XD

We have some bathrooms, which are pretty self explanatory, but then we have Janet’s room. She is big on the posters and loves having her instruments right there and ready to play. She plays guitar and piano, but I may have her pick up violin down the line. Both of them have the geek trait and are prone to playing videogames more often than not, but Jan is mostly found playing her music. 

We have a small corner of the hallway for the cat. And then last but not least: Sam’s room.

This is Samantha’s creative space. Much like my space, when she’s working, it gets messy. She loves turning on some jazz while she writes, and while she’s crafting. I gave her and Jan the knitting supplies, since I don’t really know how else to simulate sewing for these characters, and they also have some clutter. Sam has one additional mannequin in her room, and she’s into figures, so there’s one of those on the desk. Her closet and bathroom are pretty simple, but that closet is gonna be really important when we get into the story, you’ll see why later.

As always, I have their Sims up on the gallery, along with the apartment, in case you want to play with them for yourself. Just note: because of how apartments work in this game, it’s uploaded as a room, so you’re going to have to fill some walls in and add doors if you want it to work like an apartment would (and you can totally turn it into a house if you want to, you don’t need to have 1020 Alto if you wanna use this). Just search for KatAlystDesigns in the Sims 4 gallery! I’ve also uploaded a few other houses recently, including the DCTL cast for my BATIM mermaid collection, and Buddy’s mother and grandpa. 

I had a LOT of fun putting this together last night, and it’s given me a much better idea of how I want to work with things for this narrative. Bear in mind, Sammy’s the one who’s gonna have to live here and put up with it, so having these details established is gonna help me to make the fic go smoother. I may tweak some things, like actually using upper cabinets in the kitchen (which I always seem to forget about), but we’ll see. XD Either way, this was a good exercise.

I hope you’re all looking forward to exploring these two and their story as much as I am! As a quick final note, I actually have a blog set up for Nightmares are Reality to mimic the one Sam has in the fic, and I’m thinking of using it as a somewhat RP, somewhat fic and content delivery system for the story, so if you’ve got thoughts on that, or stuff you’d like to see, do let me know! Here’s wishing you are all wonderful day!

[tuffduff]

Rock Stars Make Bad Boyfriends (Vince Neil x Reader x Slash)

Pairing: Vince Neil x Reader x Slash

Words: 3,170

Request: anon! : “hi again! i’ve got another idea for an imagine so i came right to your blog - hopes that’s okay! i had an idea where the reader kind of has an unofficial thing with Vince Neil but he’s stringing her along - flirting with other girls and such almost in front of the reader’s face - & she ends up meeting slash when gnr and the crue are on tour. slash immediately falls for her & she falls for him too but slash sees how Vince treats her. slash eventually asks her on a date & vince ends up hearing about it & confronting the reader about it. she tells him she really likes slash and she’s done with him and eventually slash and the reader end up dating much to vince’s dismay. thank you so much!”

A/N: Yes, love; that is more than okay!! I love that y’all come to me with these ideas! I love this prompt and I think about this Motley/GNR tour a lot...even if it was short. Turned into a short fic, but hopefully y’all don’t mind that. Hope you’re all doing well!

Taglist: @ubernoxa​ @the--blackdahlia​ @reigns420​ @stradlin-cold-heartbreaker​ @rumoured-whispers​ @dustnbones​

“Vince?” The blonde kept his head turned away from you as though you hadn’t spoken a word. You felt the scowl on your face deepen as he sent a wave towards the girl working the outdoor bar of the hotel resort pool area. “Vince, are you even listening to me?” This time, your tone must’ve been enough to get his attention as he turned back to you.

“Aw, I’m sorry, baby. What were you saying?” You pushed your tongue against the wall of your mouth trying to summon patience; it’s not like you just spent the better part of the last five minutes trying to tell Vince about your day.

“I was talking about what happened earlier in the gift shop. There was a little girl who didn’t have enough money to buy this key chain, and a little old man bought it for her.”

“Mmm.” Vince’s head had turned again the minute you started talking. You frowned.

“And then the shop blew up. It was a huge explosion.”

“Mmhm.”

“The little girl and old man died.”

“That’s nice. Hey, I’m gonna go get us some more drinks, alright, baby?” Vince stood from his lounge chair without waiting for your reply. “Be right back!”

You sighed a little as you watched him unsurprisingly saunter over to the girl at the bar who was practically licking her lips.

All your girlfriends called you crazy for agreeing to go on tour with a rock star. Well, no; that was misleading. They encouraged going on tour, but expecting serious commitment from a rock star? In your dreams, they said. Rock stars don’t make good boyfriends.

You met Vince only about a month prior, so you knew it was nothing quite serious, but was it wrong for you to hope? You liked Vince. That first night neither of you could stop talking until the early morning hours, his eyes sparkling and unmoving from yours, his hand on your knee. But he was a humongous flirt. You tried not to let it get to you—after all, here you were poolside at a swanky resort in a room you didn’t pay for, going to concerts you didn’t have to buy tickets for. Tradeoffs, you supposed. Even still, you couldn’t help but glance over and over again as Vince stayed longer and longer at the bar. You tried to work on your tan and stay undeterred as you planned your outfit in your head for the show later.

That night, Vince complimented you already three times on the way to the arena, but that was only after he heard Tommy telling you that you were looking “hot as fuck, dude.” You still counted it as a win. Then you scolded yourself; were relationships supposed to be about winning?

You also heard Nikki saying something about how their new opening band would be starting tonight, kicking off this leg of the tour. Guns N’ Roses—you had never heard of them, but the name sounded cool. They must have been good if they were opening for the Crue.

Despite his sweet talking and possessive touch all the way to the arena, Vince soon abandoned you once you actually got there. You brushed it off; you weren’t a child. He did have a show to get ready for—you tried not to notice how many groupies you were already seeing walk by, though. There were more interesting things to see anyways. At least, you were determined to find them.

That turned out, again, to be wishful thinking. You didn’t have complete access to every part of the arena, and really, you felt bad about being in the way of all the crew members. That led to you finding the door outside, to the back of the arena, where you hoped to just find a quiet place for a moment.

It took two tugs with all your strength to actually pull open the heavy doors, but instead of opening a gateway to the outside, another body toppled into you. You let out a startled yelp.

“Oh, thank fuck, man!” You heard a soft voice say in relief. There was so much hair in your face that you couldn’t see behind all the black unruly coils to untangle yourself from this mystery guy. “I went outside just to smoke and like, chill before the show, you know, but the doors fucking locked—” you both finally untangled and you found yourself face to face with, well, still a whole lotta hair.

He had on black leather pants and a denim jacket with black sleeves, along with cowboy boots. You couldn’t see his eyes behind his curls, but you were sure he was staring right at you.

“Woah, uh...” he murmured. His voice never changed from the soft murmur. “I thought you were security or something.” You chuckled and watched as he pushed his hair away from his face, revealing pretty, brown, fascinated eyes that were, indeed, staring right at you. You could feel heat growing in your cheeks, but did your best to stay calm.

“No, just a lost soul.” You joked lightly. He blinked a few times at you, almost dumbfounded. He was adorable.

“What are you looking for?”

“Something fun.” A smile grew on his face at your reply.

“I can show you that. I’m Slash.”

“Slash?” You asked in amazement, and he chuckled.

“Yeah, well, my name’s Saul. But I’ve been called Slash for years.” Saul. Slash.

“Okay, cool. I’m Y/N.” You both exchanged smiles and he jerked his head, waiting to make sure you walked beside him rather than behind him.

He took you to where the rest of his band was gathered and introduced you to an eclectic group, all of whom were nice and chill. Less chaos than Motley, but still had that aura hanging in the air, that they were on the verge of destruction, that they were a gang.

Slash, though soft-spoken, asked you question after question—where you were from, what you normally did for fun, what music you liked as he strummed a guitar mindlessly. You watched his fingers in amazement, how effortless he made the action look. And then came his question, “why are you backstage?”

“Oh, well, I’m with—” Speak of the devil…

“Y/N?” You turned at the sound of the door slamming open and Vince appearing in the door frame. “Where the fuck have you been, I’ve been looking all over for you!”

“I’ve been listening to these guys jam. You guys picked a great opening act.” You replied coolly, and you couldn’t help but notice the way Slash smiled down at his guitar silently.

“Well, you’re supposed to be helping me with my makeup,” Vince didn’t hesitate to cross the room and pull you off the couch you were sitting on by your arm, giving you no chance in the matter. “Or, something more productive. Like putting that pretty mouth of yours to use.” You sent Vince a look and immediately snatched your arm out of his grip. No way were you going to tolerate being disrespected like that in a room full of people.

“If you wanted a sex toy to bring on the road with you, I’m sure you could have had plenty of other girls—that’s not what I am.” You replied, pushing around him and walking out of the room. Vince chased you down the hall.

“Hey! Y/N, wait! Hey, I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” Vince cooed, pulling you to a stop and pressing his lips to your neck. “I just wanted to make sure they knew you were with me; I just get jealous. Especially when you look so fucking good tonight.” You let it go, but you didn’t forget the incident. And you especially didn’t forget the moment later, when you were watching Motley Crue perform from the side of the stage, as a hand gently touched your shoulder. It was Slash.

“Hey...you ever...want...someone...find...” you couldn’t hear him over Mick’s guitar.

“What?” You yelled at him. He laughed before leaning in close to your ear. He had to brush your hair back, and his lips were practically touching your skin.

“If you ever get bored or want to have fun with someone while you’re on tour, come and find me.”

The implication of that almost had you nervous; did all these guys just think you were a road groupie? But, sure enough, Vince ditched you once more at another show and you found yourself knocking on the Guns N’ Roses dressing room door. And there was Slash, answering the door with a smile as though you had known each other for years. “Hey, dude. Check this out, tell me what you think.” He played you a guitar riff he had been working on and waited expectantly to hear your thoughts after. And that was that, you were fast friends.

You weren’t sure how to explain the phenomenon, but you knew it was mutual. Just a special connection; even when you were both still learning about each other, it felt more as if you were remembering. It was like putting on a pair of boots that had already been worn in.

And you knew it was mutual because, according to his bandmates, Slash was pretty shy unless he was drunk. But not with you; he could talk your ear off. Somehow in just a couple weeks, it felt as if you were best friends.

That was an incredible feeling in itself; at this age in life, could you really meet another person out of the blue and grow so close so fast? But beyond that, there were little moments. These moments you quickly grew to live for, these moments made your heart race and your palms sweat.

Moments when you looked over at him, cigarette hanging from his mouth as he focused on the guitar, and you never wanted to kiss a pair of lips more. Moments when you thought maybe, just maybe, Slash felt the same. He would hug you in greeting every time he saw you, but sometimes leave his arm around your waist, effectively holding you to him until he had to let you go. When you would swear you caught him already staring because of how fast he turned his head away.

“Y/N, I can’t wait for you to meet Pandora.”

“Who’s that?” He smiled up at you, his head resting on your lap as it usually did, a guitar resting in his.

“She’s my boa.”

“Your...your snake?”

“She’s the sweetest—she’s gonna love you.”

He wanted you to meet his snake—or, snakes. You laughed, and for some reason, you felt such a wave of affection hit you at just the thought of his existence. You spent more time watching Guns open from the side of the stage than you did watching Motley—you were usually goofing off with Slash at that point. Suddenly, Vince’s continuing disappearances didn’t bother you so much. The only thing that actually did bother you was when Slash would walk you up to your always empty hotel room every evening. The both of you would drag your steps every time and take unnecessary trips to the snack machine, or stand out on the balcony to check out the moon. Just anything to prolong ending the night.

“Empty again,” you joked to Slash as you opened the hotel room door to dark and vacant room. You weren’t even sure why you and Vince kept up the charade anymore—he hadn’t even kissed you in days. At this point, you were riding to the arenas with Slash and his band.

Slash didn’t laugh like you thought he would. He was looking down, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

“Can I ask you something and you promise to not get mad?” He asked you. His words were almost rushed, as though he had to gather courage to even say them.

“Yeah, of course you can. What’s up?”

“Do you actually like him? Vince?” He ventured. “I mean, I know you don’t love him, but...”

“How do you know that?” You asked out of curiosity, certainly not out of disagreement. He was right, of course. Slash shrugged a shoulder.

“I would just imagine, you know...if you love someone, you would want to be around them. Tell them things first, eat with them, just kinda look to them first.” You listened to his words, realizing over the past few days you had been doing all of the above with Slash. You had given up trying to tell the nuances of your day to Vince, but Slash listened when you told him how you short circuited the electricity with your blow dryer at the hotel. He laughed at your jokes or when you tripped backstage because he was always watching you. He gave you his jacket when he saw you shiver once, he made sure you got food after the show if you were still hungry. When he was drunk and carefree, he wouldn’t chase after groupies. He would come and find you and fall asleep on your shoulder.

“I don’t love Vince.” You confirmed softly. “Vince...had me fooled into thinking he was someone else. That he cared.”

“Then why are you with him?” You stared back at him, unable to give him an answer.

“I don’t...”

“Let’s go out.” You felt your heart jump.

“We’ve...we’ve been out, though.”

“Y/N, Denny’s after midnight is hardly a date.” He said, though he was fighting a smile; that was a good memory.

“Depends on who you ask,” you chuckled, making him chuckle. “Wait, did you say a date?”

“Well, yeah. That’s what I mean.” He said softly. “Listen, Y/N. I think you’re pretty cool. And I dunno, I’ve never really...like, there’s a lot of pretty girls out there, right? But you’re so fucking beautiful I thought I was seeing things when you opened the door that day. Then, I found out you were with Vince, and I tried to let it go, but I see how he treats you, and it pisses me off. You deserve better. But you just, us, you and I, we click, you know? I know you feel it, right?” You nodded after a moment and felt your heart flip again when he smiled. “So, give it a chance. We have the day off tomorrow. Let’s fucking do something fun—I don’t know, we can go to the fucking zoo! Or go find some concert somewhere or just, go anywhere.”

“...Okay.” You agreed with a smile. He grinned back at you.

“Okay? So like, early afternoon? 4 or something?” You smiled; was he that excited to see you? Your heart hadn’t been this giddy in a long time.

“Yeah, that sounds great with me.”

It was barely 3 in the afternoon and you were towel drying your wet hair, fresh out of the shower, when your hotel room slammed open. Vince appeared for the first time since you’d last seen him before the concert the night before, staring at you with what you could only describe as fury. You stared at him silently.

“Can you fucking tell me why all the Guns N’ Roses guys are hyping up Slash for his big date tonight with Y/N?” He demanded. You looked down, waiting for the shake and guilt to hit you, but it never came.

“Vince, it’s not like we were in love with each other.” You said with quiet bluntness. Vince’s eyes grew wide.

“I brought you on fucking tour with me!”

“And ever since then you’ve left me night in and night out to go and sleep with every groupie that comes your way! We haven’t slept in the same bed in weeks! There are fucking lipstick stains on your neck right now, Vince!” He glanced in the mirror quickly before he cursed under his breath.

“Y/N...it’s just, the way it is, you know? That’s the life we live.”

“You just fuck other girls and have me waiting for you too? That’s the life?”

“Alright, I fucked up. I do care about you, Y/N, baby. I do. I’m trying. I’ll do better.” Vince’s voice was soft and sugary, and he walked over to you, grabbing your hand in his, holding your eyes with his. “Just give me another shot. We’ll have some fun.” This time, his smooth talking did nothing for you; your heart was already taken by someone else. You slipped your hand out of his and silently began gathering up your things.

“What are you doing, Y/N?” Vince laughed as you shoved your clothes in your luggage. “C’mon, baby, just calm down. You’re not even dressed.” You sent him an incredulous look.

“I am more than calm. Goodbye, Vince.”

“Where are you going? Y/N, seriously! Oh, what—are you just gonna jump onto the next rock star? I thought you weren’t a groupie, huh? He just wants to fuck you and then he’ll drop you, just you fucking wait! That’s all we do!”

“No, that’s what you do. You don’t speak for him or me.” You snapped over your shoulder at Vince’s childish yelling. The door slammed behind you and you smirked a little.

You made your way through the hotel in your towel, barefoot and hair dripping, and knocked on the door you knew to be Slash’s. He opened it slowly in confusion, and felt your heart expand at the sight of him already dressed and ready to go much too early—clean hair swept out of his eyes, a flannel that was barely buttoned, and leather pants. He took one look at your bag and towel.

“It’s not 4 yet.” He said, the hint of a smile on his lips.

“Speak for yourself.” You said, fighting the urge to smile back. He leaned against the door frame, now smiling outright. “…You know, I think I just lost my backstage pass.” Slash laughed.

“It’s all good; I’ll sneak you in in my guitar case or some shit. And besides; this leg of the tour is almost over. We only have a few shows with them left. Next month, we’re opening for Alice Cooper.” He paused a little, his voice turning serious. “You know you can come, if you want.”

“I don’t know,” you murmured, looking down. Some of the things Vince had said were sinking in; you didn’t want to be known as just some groupie that jumped from band to band. Slash touched your shoulder in an effort to get you to look at him.

“I want you to come.” Your heart fluttered again, and threatened to soar out of your chest entirely when he leaned forward and gave you a light and sweet tender peck on the lips—your very first kiss together. He pulled back too quickly, laughing. “You look ridiculous.” You glanced back down at your towel again and laughed. Slash took your bag from your shoulder and stood aside. “You know, I’ve only got one bed in here.”

“That sounds good to me.”

[niksixx]

New Generation: Meet the Kids

I know many of you have been waiting patiently for anything New Generation related, and I am happy to say I have finally completed a list of the NG kids! I hope you enjoy reading about my little characters, and I can’t wait to write a few little stories about them. 

A few shoutouts first. To all of you who have contributed to the characters’ personalities by sending in messages to my inbox, thank you. You have all made this series possible. I did my best to incorporate my own vision of the NG kids as well as your ideas to create something fun for us all. Second, a big shoutout to @pepeu-stuff for inspiring me. They have gone out of their way to draw a few characters (Farrah, Ezra, etc.) with their own interpretation and have inspired some of the traits for my characters. I truly cherish all of you, and I hope you enjoy the NG kids as much as I do.

A/N: Also, this is just a fanfiction. I tried my best to incorporate Crüe’s and GNR’s personalities into their ‘children’ but we all know kids can 100% be completely different from their parents. 🤗

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Meet the Sixx Kids

Nash Sixx 

Nash Sixx is the nineteen-year-old son of Nikki Sixx. He has dark hair and blue eyes with specks of green and a jawline most men would kill for. Like his father, he has an outgoing personality and a killer smirk that’s manipulated people into giving him what he wants more than once. He’s a college student that is studying music education, as he would like to be a music teacher. One of his best friends is Declan Rose, and he’s taught Declan a few tips and tricks when it comes to schmoozing the ladies. He’s also a big partier, and loves having his friends and cousins over to his college apartment. Nash’s favorite pastime though is sitting around the bonfire, glass of whiskey in his hand, while his father tells him stories of life on the road with Mötley Crüe.  

Harlow Sixx 

Harlow Sixx is the six-year-old daughter of Nikki Sixx. She has dark brown hair with clear blue eyes and free-spirited energy. Harlow and Penelope Lee are a package deal and will go nowhere without each other. She’s creative by nature, and sometimes will paint during rainy days. For a six year-old, Harlow is ridiculously intelligent. And just like her father, she has interests in photography and art.

Colby Sixx

Colby Sixx is the two-year-old son of Nikki Sixx. He has Nikki’s natural light brown hair and light blue-gray eyes. He loves finger painting with his sister, playing with toy cars, and putting together puzzles. 

Meet the Lee Kids 

Penelope ‘Penny’ Lee

Penelope ‘Penny’ Lee is the five-year-old daughter of Tommy Lee. She’s a little girl with wavy brown hair (usually in pigtails with little bows attached), big brown eyes, a love for bright pink tutus, and has a bubbly, outgoing personality. She’s the spitting image of her father, and she has him wrapped around her tiny little finger. Penny Lee enjoys her dolls, her teddy bears, and tea parties. She’s been raised to be an independent child and loves exploring nature and making pretty flower bouquets. Penelope can be friends with anyone, and at five-years-old, she’s already shutting down the bullies who make fun of the other kids at preschool.

Meet the Mars Kids

Dillion Mars 

Dillon Mars is the seventeen-year-old son of Mick Mars. He’s tall, lanky, with soft brown hair, blue eyes, and a sarcastic attitude. He’s not as quiet as his father, but he has his moments. Dillion tries not to take life too seriously, which is why he and Isaac Stradlin get along extremely well. Dillion has no interest in school, although he’s extremely smart in math and science. He’s president of his school’s mathletes club though he was pressured by his teachers and hates disappointing others. Most of his time is spent on the living room aimlessly playing his guitar,  Luckily, Dillon did not inherit his father’s bone disease, but he is a huge vodka drinker and occasionally will smoke cigarettes with the Stradlin twins and Ryan McKagan.

Meet the Neil Kids 

Katerina ‘Kat’ Neil 

Katerina ‘Kat’ Neil is the eighteen-year-old daughter of Vince Neil. Kat’s thin blonde hair is usually styled straight or into two space buns on the top of her head with a few pieces framing her face. Green eyes the color of emeralds, she’s the chick every girl wants to be, and the girl every guy wants to be with. Katerina is friendly to all, but she’ll never let anyone take advantage of her kindness. As a senior in high school, she takes pride in being the captain of the cheerleading team, a lead choreographer in the dance club, and the president of the drama club. While the most popular girl in high school could have any boy she wanted, there’s only one boy that Katerina has ever been interested in. Unfortunately, that boy is Declan Rose, the son of her father’s arch enemy, Axl Rose. 

Carson Neil

Carson Neil is the fifteen-year-old son of Vince Neil. Carson’s shoulder length blonde hair resembles his father’s, and he was gifted with a singing voice that could cure the world’s problems. He’s mature for his age, which is why most of his friends are a few years older than him. Carson can be a bit stuck up though and a bit of a prima donna. When he’s not busy rehearsing lines for his school's theater productions, Carson is confined to his room blasting Aerosmith, Ozzy Osborne, and writing his own lyrics to songs he’ll never share. 

~~~

Meet the Rose Kids

Declan Rose 

Declan Rose is the eighteen-year-old son of Axl Rose. He’s the spitting image of his father, except with shorter ginger hair with longer pieces framing his freckled face. Declan is unique in the fact that he refuses to follow in his father’s footsteps. While he enjoys listening to rock and his father’s old vinyl collection, Declan prefers hip-hop and rap music, much to his father’s dismay. Like Axl, Declan is extremely intelligent, and would decide to major in philosophy or psychology in college. He also does have his father’s temper, and while sometimes his father was misunderstood, Declan is lucky to have Katerina Neil around. She calms him down and supports his true personality, even if they have to keep their relationship hidden from their parents. 

Easton Rose 

Easton Rose is the eight-year-old son of Axl Rose. Easton was lucky enough to inherit his father’s hair color, but instead of the long locks, Easton’s hair is shorter and usually styled with gel. The eight-year-old is as stubborn as they come with a hyper and fiery personality to match his hair. He’s an athletic young boy who is also extremely personable and will talk to anyone. He’s impatient, especially when he wants his older brother Declan to help him with homework or play baseball in the backyard with his best friends Logan Adler and Hunter McKagan. Easton is a little flirt and has no problem charming ladies of any age. Easton also has a big crush on his brother’s girlfriend, Kat. 

Calla Rose 

Calla Rose is the five-year-old daughter of Axl Rose, and she is the queen of the household. Calla is the only child with blonde hair, but every now and again Axl dyes pieces of her pink (with temporary spray on hair color of course) to match the large gemstone on the tiara she wears around the house. Calla Rose is quite shy around other people, and it takes her a good twenty minutes before she’s able to muster up the courage to play with other children in preschool. Axl Rose is fully wrapped around his daughter’s finger, and it’s not shocking to catch them in the midst of coloring, ballet dancing, or playing with dolls. 

Willa Rose 

Willa Rose is the four-month-old daughter of Axl Rose. She’s a chubby baby with ginger hair and big hazel eyes. She loves making faces at her big sister and listening to her daddy as he sings her to sleep at night. 

Meet the McKagan Kids 

Ryan McKagan 

Ryan McKagan is the sixteen-year-old son of Duff McKagan. If teenage girls could use one word to describe this boy, it’s this: heartthrob. He’s tall with wavy blonde hair and a welcoming smile, it’s no wonder the girls in high school drool over him. Ryan can be found exercising (as he’s a hockey player) or running around his neighborhood five days out of the week. Ryan does smoke cigarettes and drinks on occasion, much to his father’s disapproval. Ryan tries not to take life too seriously and would have definitely picked up on some of his dad’s lame jokes. Around his neck is the letter ‘F’ attached to a gold chain as it’s the first initial of his girlfriend’s name, Farrah. Even if they have a rough relationship (thanks to Ryan being a typical flirt around other girls) he’s confident Farrah is the girl for him, so he never takes the necklace off. While Ryan didn’t necessarily inherit many of his father’s traits, what he did receive is the ability to sing. His father has taught him how to play guitar, and they’ll sit on the porch outside in the fall, singing and strumming to Guns N’ Roses old songs.

Hunter McKagan

Hunter is the seven-year-old son of Duff McKagan. Hunter’s hair is darker than his older brother’s, but lightens up in the sun. The seven-year-old boy loves to swim and skateboard (lessons are provided for free by Dillon Mars, Issac Stradlin, and Ezra Hudson), and he’s an absolute terror when he chases his family around the house shooting Nerf gun darts at them. He’s also the reason Duff cannot find his cowboy hats, as Hunter will usually steal them and wear them throughout the day. 

Meet the Hudson Kids 

Ezra Hudson 

Ezra Hudson is the eighteen-year-old son of Saul ‘Slash’ Hudson. Ezra is a bit shorter than his father, and yet could be his brother. Ezra was blessed with the most beautiful curls, and unlike his father he usually keeps them out of his face with headbands or ponytails. Ezra doesn’t have just one style, either. Somedays, he’ll dress head to toe in leather. Other days he prefers flannels and jeans, or button ups and khakis. Ezra is definitely a gamer. He also enjoys hiking, fishing, and hunting. He’s also into music, but is still learning how to play acoustic guitar. College is not in the cards for Ezra, as his dream is to form his own band. As for Ezra’s love life, he’s a total chick magnet. Unfortunately, he’s invisible to the only girl he wants: Isabel Stradlin. 

Mali Hudson 

Mali is the six-year-old daughter of Saul ‘Slash’ Hudson. She and her sister Maya were also blessed with their father’s glorious curly hair, and they’re damn proud of it. Mali’s hair is only to her shoulders, which is how you can tell twin from twin. At just six-years-old, little Mali has a plethora of hobbies such as origami, bracelet making, and flower pressing. Many of her crafts are given to either her parents or Farrah Adler. 

Maya Hudson

Maya is the six-year-old daughter (also the oldest twin between herself and Mali) of Saul ‘Slash’ Hudson. Maya has no problem wearing identical outfits with her sister, but their personalities couldn’t be more opposite. Maya loves to wrestle with her older brother and cousins (especially Declan who refuses to wrestle back for fear of hurting her) as well as having interests in dinosaurs, rock climbing, karate, and reptiles (she convinced her family to adopt two snakes and a lizard). 

Meet the Stradlin Kids 

Isaac Stradlin 

Issac Stradlin is the seventeen-year-old son of Izzy Stradlin. With dark shaggy hair, bright eyes, sharp jaw and toned body, Isaac comes off as intimidating at first glance. He can be intense about the things he is passionate about (music, poetry, history) but more often than not Isaac is laidback and easygoing. Isaac’s musical knowledge comes from what his father has taught him through the years, and he’s incredibly talented when it comes to playing instruments such as guitar, drums, keyboard, flute, and trumpet. He doesn’t particularly enjoy his father’s dark and gloomy style of dress that includes black jeans, black button ups, and even black hats, as he feels more comfortable in sweatpants and tank tops. As Isaac is the only boy that doesn’t mind babysitting and playing with the little girls, he has accidentally found himself a fan club whose members consist of Penny Lee, Calla Rose, Harlow Sixx, and twins Mali and Maya Hudson. 

Isabel Stradlin 

Isabel Stradlin is the seventeen-year-old daughter of Izzy Stradlin and the younger of the two between her and her twin brother, Isaac. Isabel marches to the beat of her own drum and has what most would call a ‘bone to pick with the world’ attitude. Isabel has had many different styles, but her current wardrobe is grunge. Isabel considers herself a humanitarian, constantly joining in protests while simultaneously volunteering at homeless shelters and soup kitchens. Because of her compassionate heart, it’s no secret that she and Farrah Adler are inseparable. Isabel would inherit her father’s artistic ability, but her art would range from pottery to graffiti portraits. 

Meet the Adler Kids 

Farrah Adler 

Farrah Adler is the sixteen-year-old daughter of Steven Adler. Her blonde hair is mostly straight with a few layers here and there, and she has the same vibrant and playful eyes as her father. Farrah’s style is mostly hippie influenced (but on occasion she can rock a leather jacket and bandana), and she has more of a laid back personality, something she absolutely did NOT get from her dad. As someone who treasures the beauty of the Earth and its creatures, Farrah would join in rallies such as ‘save the sea turtles’ and volunteer at animal hospitals, where she discovered her calling as a veterinarian. Oh, and she’s 100% vegetarian. Farrah has a peaceful aura, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise that she enjoys yoga, astrology, essential oils, journaling, and smoking weed. She also has an on-again-off-again relationship with Ryan McKagan, who she drags to many wildlife rallies.

Logan Adler 

Logan Adler is the nine-year-old son of Steven Adler. He has wavy blonde hair past his neck, playful gray eyes, and a love for drumming. Logan inherited his father’s happy-go-lucky spirit, and loves to meddle into his sister’s business when he’s not playing sports or building legos. He definitely is the class clown and loves being the center of attention, which usually results in him being sent to the principal’s office. He’s a jokester, a prankster, and loves getting into trouble.

[voltrontranscript]

VForce E2: Defenders of Arus

Episode 2: Defenders of Arus

Transcript by @dragonofyang

Summary: Cadets Vince and Daniel begin their training on Arus, where they meet another cadet named Larmina. Meanwhile, Keith evades capture by Wade’s troops with the help of Hunk and Pidge. On Doom, Commander Kala and Maahox revive King Lotor and prepare an assault on Arus.

[Google Doc]

Drule Captain: Commander Kala, we’ve reached safe distance barrier from the Haggarium quasar.

Kala: Proceed with the sample acquisition. You have failed me, captain. Maahox, your attempts to harness the power of the Haggarium quasar seem futile and have cost a good portion of the fleet.

Maahox: Yes, yes.

Kala: I told you that if it didn’t work this time I would destroy you. Your irritating smile suggests you doubt my conviction to follow through.

Maahox: No, Commander Kala, quite the contrary. It is my faith in your conviction to squash the life from me that has me beaming. For you see, it seems our captain hasn’t failed us after all. In fact, I believe he’s become part of the solution.

[Transition to opening sequence, with an electric guitar playing under the following lyrics.]

Woo!

One, two, three four!

Voltron’s here, kicking down your door!

Five, six, get with it.

We blaze ‘em with the sword and they can’t get away.

Seven, eight.

We’re bringing down the hurt so we’re here to stay.

Nine, ten, we here to win.

Voltron’s here, let the games begin!

Oh! (Let’s Voltron!)

Oh! (Let’s Voltron!)

Oh! (Let’s Voltron!)

Form up, let’s go!

All night! Let’s go!

Alright, we gonna rock (rock!) and roll (roll!)

Now to rock (rock!) and roll (roll!)

Oh!

[Transition to the Castle of Lions on Arus.]

Allura: ...and we’ll conclude our tour in the castle control room where all of the Voltron missions are planned.

Daniel: Are these the doors to the lions? Can we see them?

Allura: All in good time. However, right now you’ll be going through this door to your top-secret classroom.

Daniel: Wow, our top secret classroom. Looks a lot like a classroom.

Allura: It’s equipped with just enough to suit its educating purposes.

Vince: So, there’s a third desk?

Larmina: Oh, yay. Classmates.

Vince: Well, she seems nice.

Daniel: Yeah, real nice.

Allura: Ahem. Vince, Daniel, I’d like you to meet my niece, Larmina.

Lance: Well played, knuckleheads.

Allura: As you all know, the Voltron force is made up of five separate lions that are strong individually, but are much more powerful when they come together to form the mighty Voltron. Unity is our core. These are your voltcomms. Over time you will learn all of their practical applications, but it is more than a mere tactical device. It is your link to the lions, and more importantly to each other. As I activate each of you with the power of a lion, you’re becoming part of a team. Part of the Voltron legacy. I welcome you and turn you over to Lance who has the great responsibility of teaching you how to carry this honor.

Lance: Thank you. Well, now that we’re all part of the Voltron elite, let’s begin our first class with a pop quiz.

Vince: Huh?

Larmina: Come on.

Daniel: I thought this school was about piloting the Voltron lions!

Lance: There’s a lot more to being part of the Voltron force than piloting the lions. We’re gonna test your hand-to-hand combat skills to see what we’re working with. Who wants to go first? Which of you gentlemen would like to fight the lady?

[Scene change to Keith flying Black Lion.]

Pidge: Keith, I’ve been running some diagnostics. Whatever Wade did to your lion at his secret research facility really screwed it up. The weapons systems are completely down. The power’s almost drained.

Keith: Tell me something I don’t know.

Pidge: You need to get back to Arus to recharge, but you’ll never make it flying at combat levels.

Keith: Well, it’s a good thing I’m not.

Pidge: Yeah, about that…

[Scene change to the training deck in the Castle of Lions.]

Vince: You hit her.

Daniel: I’m not gonna hit a girl.

Vince: I don’t wanna--ah!

Larmina: I’ll take you both on.

Daniel: Woah.

Lance: You ladies haven’t been in a lot of fights, have you?

Vince: No.

[Scene change back to Keith in Black Lion.]

Keith: Of course Wade installed a tracking device. Can you disable the signal before they reach me?

Pidge: No, I can’t seem to pinpoint the beacon’s location in the lion. They’re going to catch up to you.

Keith: When?

[Scene change to Wade in his office.]

General: Sir, our fractals have the target in sight and are about to engage.

Wade: Command the pilots to prove their worth and recover that lion in as many pieces as necessary. You’ve already lost it once, general. Have you located the former Voltron Force members now under my employment? I’d like to question them personally.

General: No, sir. They all seem to be AWOL.

[Cut to Pidge at a large computer in the Den.]

Pidge: Don’t worry, Keith. Hunk and I have been working on a contingency plan. We just need a bit more time.

Computer: Attention. The following individuals are to report to Security.

Pidge: Uh, I’ll get right back to you.

Keith: Right back to me? Are you kidding?

Pidge: Oh, you might want to take evasive action about now.

[Cut to Keith in Black Lion.]

Keith: What? Oh, boy.

[Cut to Pidge and Hunk in a tow-ship.]

Pidge: Download Den intelligence report.

Hunk: Downloading to tow-ship.

Pidge: Wha--? Haggar? Keith? It’s worse than we thought.

[Scene change to Planet Doom.]

Maahox: Welcome back, King Lotor.

[Scene change back to the cadets on the training deck.]

Vince: Man…

Larmina: Anytime you’re ready to start. 

Vince: Yeah!

Larmina: Cheap playground trick? That’s all you got?

Daniel: Hey, who’s the one on their butt?

Larmina: You, in about two seconds.

Lance: Alright, let’s just review your test results, shall we?

Daniel: Wait, you graded that?

Lance: No, your voltcomms did. You guys have no idea how cool these things are. Pretty soon, you’ll just think something and the voltcomm will automatically do it.

Daniel: It can read our minds?

Vince: Psh. No, dude. It must read our body’s signals. Minor muscle movements, adrenaline levels, blood pressure, and associate those with specific voltcomm functions. Probably some form of biometrics.

Lance: I was just gonna say it’s magic. It picks up on your natural talents and abilities, then adapts to strengthen them. In this case, I wanted to see what weapon it picked for each of you based on your fighting abilities. Larmina, hit this button.

Vince: Nice… stick?

Larmina: I like my stick.

Lance: Uh-huh. And how about you boys?

Daniel: What do I do with these? Reow. Whoa!

Lance: Okay, we’ll have to work on that one. Let’s see what the ol’ voltcomm has in store for you, Vince.

Vince: What is happening?

Lance: Uh, Pidge’ll look at that, too.

Larmina: Must’ve been impressed with your combat skills.

Lance: Ah-ah, I wouldn’t talk too much smack before your second period class, which is definitely more Vince’s dojo.

Daniel: More simulators, huh?

Vince: Oh! This is much more than a simulator. It’s a lion simulator.

[Scene change to Keith in Black Lion.]

Keith: Pidge, you gotta warn the others, but I’m gonna need some sort of distraction here. Without weapons, all I can do is outrun these guys. And I can’t do that for long.

Pidge: I know. I’m working on something. Here, it looks like there’s an asteroid field nearby. You can try and lose them in there.

Keith: Little game of cat and mouse.

[Scene change to Castle Doom.]

Lotor: I feel… a strange sensation running through my veins.

Maahox: That’s only natural, having just been raised from the grave with the power of Haggarium.

Lotor: Haggarium. As in the witch, Haggar?

Maahox: The very essence of Haggar, my lord.

Lotor: Yes! I feel the dark energy. How ironic. Haggar’s power giving me life. You call me your lord, yet I know neither of you.

Maahox: Forgive me, this is Commander Kala from the planet Darkor. What she lacks in personality she makes up for in tactical brilliance and bloodlust.

Lotor: Charming. And you?

Maahox: I am Maahox, master of experimental occult sciences and exile from Calum. These titles are related.

Lotor: Well, exile and commander, I imagine you feel I am indebted to you for bringing me back into existence. I also assume that means you want something from me.

Maahox: We can all benefit from each other. I’ll go into the details once you’ve adjusted to reanimation. For now, just know that a common hatred has brought us together.

Lotor: Voltron…

[Scene change to the cadets in the simulators.]

Vince: This is amazing!

Larmina: Woah!

Daniel: It feels like the real deal, but there’s really only one way to tell. Awesome!

Larmina: Well, I hate this techy stuff. I’d much rather be beating you up in real li--

Vince: My dojo.

[Cut to Lance and Allura watching the simulation on the bridge.]

Lance: I really like these goons, but I don’t get why you wanted me to bring them here now.

Allura: Wiser forces than myself have set this in motion.

Pidge: Allura! Lance! You guys there?

Allura: Pidge! Is everything okay?

Pidge: No. You better see this. And this.

Allura: We need to step up the curriculum.

[Scene change to Castle Doom.]

Lotor: The Voltron force. They nearly succeeded in destroying me! Now they must pay.

Maahox: All part of Kala’s brilliant plan already set in motion. Please, my lord, today is your re-birthday. You should sit back and enjoy our present to you. A neatly-packaged gift on its way to Arus.

[Cut to Keith in Black Lion.]

Keith: Lance taught them well. Luckily, I’m a better pilot than Lance.

Pidge: We need to disable Wade’s tracking device or you’ll never lose them. If I use their signal feed to hone in… Yeah! Got it! I found the beacon location.

Keith: It’s not like I can crawl down there at the moment, Pidge. It’s time for this cat to chase the mice.

[Scene change to the bridge of the Castle of Lions.]

Allura: We believe a dark evil is rising. We also believe each of you are going to be part of the force that defeats this evil.

Daniel: Why us?

Allura: Because you have been chosen to-- It’s a robeast coffin!

Lance: Already? It can’t be. We need to take out the lions and investigate.

Daniel: Cool!

Lance: No. Not cool. You guys stay here. Are you cool with this? Activating the lions breaks strict Galaxy Alliance sanctions. Arus will face consequences.

Allura: We have no choice.

[Scene change to Keith in Black Lion.]

Keith: Come to me. Closer… Closer… 

Pidge: Keith! The beacon signal’s gone. How’d you knock it out?

Keith: I didn’t. He did.

[Scene change to Wade in his office.]

General: Sir, they’ve lost the Black Lion.

Wade: Incompetent fools.

General: And there’s more. We’ve just received confirmation that the red and blue lions have been activated on Arus.

Wade: What? How? The keys, fakes! I am through with human error.

[Scene change to Keith in Black Lion.]

Keith: I better get back to Arus while I still can. Pidge, send me the--Pidge! I’ve lost power.

Pidge: Keith! Keith, do you copy? We’re almost there! Keith?

Allura: Pidge, our security detected a robeast coffin landing on Arus. Lance and I are going to investigate.

Pidge: Alright, we’ve got Keith in our sight. We’ll be there as soon as we can.

[Cut to Arus.]

Allura: That may not be soon enough.

Lance: I think I imagined a more romantic reunion with the lions. I take it back. I think the two of us just shared a beautiful moment.

Allura: No offense, but I wish the whole team were here to share it with us.

[Cut to the cadets on the bridge.]

Daniel: We can’t just sit here!

Vince: What can we do? No way, Daniel. Maybe the others are almost here.

[Scene change to the tow-ship.]

Keith: Not a lick of power in him, is there?

Vince: Pidge! What’s your ETA?

Pidge: Doing the best we can!

Vince: Well, hurry. Lance and Allura really need your help.

Keith: Um, who was that?

[Cut to Blue and Red Lions on Arus.]

Lance: Looks like we’re going to have to engage him as a twosome. You ready?

Allura: Cover me.

Lance: Allura! No!

Allura: Lance! Lance, are you okay? Lance!

[Cut to the cadets on the bridge.]

Daniel: That’s it! We gotta do something. Woohoo! Time to go fast. Aw yeah!

[Cut back to Red and Blue Lions facing the robeast.]

Allura: Hunk?

Daniel: Uh, not exactly. Eat laser! Whoops. Uh, how about now?

Allura: Daniel!

Daniel: I know, I know. Sorry! I don’t know the weapons, but I can still fly.

Lance: Daniel, what are you--

Allura: Lance, are you okay?

Lance: I think my arm is broken, but I still got some fight in me. At least there’s three of us now.

[Cut to the tow-ship and Black Lion.]

Keith: Guys, I gotta get down there. Is there any way to speed this up?

Pidge: Only if we get some power to the lion to help propel it. But we don’t have a source capable of…

[Cut to Arus.]

Allura: If we keep working together, we can keep this beast on its heels.

Lance: Yeah, but does anyone have any ideas how to get it off its heels?

Daniel: Don’t look at me for strategy, unless you want cheap playground tricks.

Lance: You’re a genius, Danny-boy. Allura, maintain your position. Daniel, let’s play.

Daniel: Yeah! Knocked you down on your ro-butt!

Lance: Nice, but not the time to gloat. Pin it!

Allura: We need to pin that other arm. We need another lion.

Vince: Did somebody say “another lion”?

[Cut to the tow-ship and Black Lion.]

Pidge: Alright, that should hopefully transfer all the lion power from your voltcomm into--it worked! Great! Now, wait, you don’t have enough power to hear me because your voltcomm is dead. Punch it, Hunk!

[Cut back to Arus.]

Allura: Come on, guys, concentrate! You’re a team. You can do it!

Vince: Here. You control the jaws while I take the legs.

Larmina: Like this?

Vince: Yeah!

[Cut to Black Lion.]

Keith: Come on, we’re almost in Arus’ gravitational pull! You can do it!

Pidge: It’s dead again. We need to try something else.

Hunk: Try it my way, with some muscle.

Pidge: What are you--

Hunk: Keith! Get ready to do your hero thing!

[Cut back to Arus’ surface.]

Lance: I can’t get a shot without losing my grip. Come on, guys, concentrate!

Daniel: We’re losing him!

Vince: Okay, I think we got it!

Allura: We need our whole team. Where’s--

Lance: What was that?

Keith: Come on! Hold!

Allura: Keith!

Lance: It’s good to see ya, old pal. You’re still rocking the mullet? Man, you have been underground for a long time.

Allura: Yeah, we’ll have to do something about that. Where are Pidge and Hunk?

Pidge: Did we get ‘em?

Allura: Pidge! You’re okay! Yes, yes, we did.

Pidge: Great. Now you wanna come get us?

[Scene change to the Voltron force and cadets standing in the bridge.]

Hunk: Hey, nice haircut. About time.

Lance: You did real good today, Dan-man, even though you lost your head.

Daniel: At least I didn’t lose my arm.

Lance: Ha. Come on. Hey, Keith. I wanna introduce you to my new hero.

[Cut to Castle Doom.]

Lotor: What was that?

Kala: King Lotor, that robeast defeat was part of my plan. It was a relic from your days: a minor challenge to bring Voltron back into the open. We have something much more powerful in store.

Maahox: What you and your predecessors failed to realize is that some of the best raw material for robeasts isn’t found in your battle arena, but in nature herself.

Kala: Eons of evolution perfecting efficient, savage predators.

Maahox: Yes, but the problem with these creatures is that they lack the brain capacity for reason. For strategy. Which is why we need to give this to our next generation of Haggarium-powered robeasts. My own evolution.

Kala: This wasn’t part of my plan! What--what did--ah!

Maahox: No, but it was part of mine. Don’t fight it, dear commander. I promise you’ll love what I’ve done with you.

Lotor: Yes, and so will the Voltron force.

End.

[motleycrueroadie]

Along for the Ride (pt.5)

Author’s Note: Thank you to anyone that is reading this! I apologize if the pace of this is slow, now that I have my character established I’ll be moving through the scenes. This is Mick’s audition and the next one will include meeting Vince and so on!

Previous Chapters: One I Two I Three I Four

Over the course of my life, I think it’s safe to say that I have become fairly acquainted to fresh starts.

Leaving Deanna 

Moving from one end of the West Coast to the other

Changing my name to Nikki Sixx ( leaving Frank Carlton Serafina Feranna Jr. behind)

And now, leaving London for another fresh start.

 In the time that I’ve been alive, I have learned the quick and harsh lesson that you are the only person you can count on, so whether I want to have 0 or 40 fresh starts, that’s up to me. I’m not saying these are always going to work out in my favour, or that I am always going to make the right decision - quite frankly I make stupid ass decisions mostly - but I am the only person that I can truly count on. 

Do I regret leaving London? No. Do I regret the way I left them? Absolutely fucking not. However, am I feeling a little pessimistic about this band, considering that it consists of a drummer I met at a diner and some guitar player he’s dragging along? You can bet your fucking ass I am. 

Sometimes a fresh start begins with a blind shot in the dark and that is what I was doing right now. Last Friday, I met Tommy in a diner and today, the following Sunday, I’m waiting to see whether this is beginning on a good or bad note. I mean, fuck, I haven’t even heard Tommy play, he could be dog shit for all I know, but I trusted him. The kid must know his way around a set of drums, the way he was spinning those stupid fucking sticks around his fingers. 

The funny thing about quitting a band is that you have a lot more free time on your hands. Since I didn’t really have much else to do during this week, I figured I could bug Janis, and she didn’t seem to mind. Our routine remained intact. When I got off work, I waited for her to be done with her run before coming over for dinner. One of the only things that changed was how much time I spent at her place. She started letting me come over while she was in the shower, after I complained that I had nothing to do while I waited. Of course, everything Janis allowed me to do came with a price she told me. Janis explained to me the other night that because she was no “Mother Teresa” as she put it, that I would need to start earning my keep if I was going to be eating her food. We both knew she was joking, but I couldn’t let her joking go without consequence. The shades of red she blushed when I offered to do some of her chores while she showered and got dinner ready were well worth the work I put in. Janis gave me a quite modest list: water the houseplants and vacuum any dirt off the carpet that I got on the floor while I watered them. The chore itself never took me more than 20 minutes, which left enough time for me to be nosy. Somehow, Janis managed to fill every square inch of the apartment with something, all without making the place seem cluttered. She had knick-knacks and photos lining the wall and she also had this large bookcase in her living room that held all sorts of things. The radio and a cassette collection occupied the first shelf, board games on the second and on the bottom were a couple thick photo books alongside her high school yearbooks. I knew Janis was a runner from past conversations, but I had no idea she was a state champion. In fact, Janis seemed to have been the whole package in her high school days. She was a state champion runner, graduated with honors according to her diploma and had great grades but yet I didn’t see a college degree on her wall. I hadn’t brought this up yet, but I want to ask her about these books soon - she doesn’t know I’ve been through them though so I figured it could wait. 

The clock on the stove reads 3:45 when I hear a lot of noise outside my apartment. Rolling my eyes I headed towards the door, only to open it to see Tommy and his buddy Greg carrying equipment up the stairs. 

“Didn’t I tell you guys to come here at 4?” Despite the fact that it’s often polite to be early, I had told these guys to show up no earlier than 4 for our first practice because I didn’t want to disturb Janis while she slept. 

“Dude, it’s going to take me a bit to set this shit up, if we want to get started at 4 I should’ve been here earlier” Tommy grunted back intermittently, while trying to help Greg carry an amp up the stairs.Either I hadn’t made myself clear on the phone or Tommy doesn’t listen. Tommy was doing more of the heavy lifting than Greg by the looks of it, which wasn’t a good sign to me. 

“You the minivan?” I asked him, my way of offering help. He nodded to me while steering towards the door. As I went down the stairs, I glanced back up at Janis’s apartment to see if the noise had woken her up. I know it’s only 15 minutes of sleep but 15 minutes is a pretty big deal. To my surprise, she was leaning against the railing on the balcony. 

“Think you could come down here and help us out Joplin?” I call out to her, squinting up against the sun to see her in her pajamas and fuzzed out hair. 

“You boys look like you’re doing just fine!” She said, motioning with her hand for me to continue what I was doing. I hadn’t noticed Tommy walking down the stairs until he was beside me. 

“Isn’t that the waitress from the diner?” He asked me as we continued down the stairs to the minivan. 

“You tell me.” I smirked at him, knowing full well he remembered who she was. When I got to the bottom of the stairs, I turned around to find her still there.

“Can we postpone dinner until after practice?” I yell up to her. 

“Only if you play Barracuda as your last song.” She replied. I furrowed my brow, confused at the request.

“Why?” Tommy was the one to reply for me. 

“I like it.” She said, and I laughed at how matter of fact she stated this. “Plus it tells me when you’re done. Food will be hot half an hour after the opening chords.” Flashing a thumbs up back at her I turned around to continue what we were doing. 

“Do we get food too?” This came from Greg. 

“No.” I quickly replied, even though I knew Janis would feed them. I just didn’t want them there. 

We started practicing around half past 4, and finished at half past 8. In the four hours that we had spent in my apartment, I had shown Tommy and Greg a couple of songs and tried to get to know them. All I had learned was that Tommy and Greg were both in a band called “Suite 19” before this and that Greg couldn’t play the way I wanted him to. At 8:25, I had told them to start playing Barracuda because I was getting hungry and my patience was wearing thin. Heading up the stairs towards Janis’s apartment, I felt relieved to know I would be in her presence for the next little bit. Before rounding the corner I could hear Janis, not the girl that lived above me, but Janis Joplin singing Me and My Bobby McGee. Pushing open the door, I reached up to catch the bell before it could ring so as to not alert Janis that I was in the apartment. She was standing at the stove, swaying back and forth while lightly singing along to the song - just faint enough that you almost couldn’t hear her if you weren’t paying attention. Leaning against the door, I tried to keep as quiet as possible just to watch her. Suddenly, she stopped swaying and I thought my cover had been blown. 

“It’s been 30 minutes, I wonder what he’s up to?” She was thinking out loud. 

“He’s waiting to see if you notice that he’s in the apartment.” She whipped around, visibly surprised. 

“Sixx!” she practically yelled, clutching a hand to her chest. I could only laugh, and the stunned look she held on her face quickly faded into a laugh. That was one of the things that I enjoyed most about Janis’s company, she was never one to dwell when she was in a bad mood. She ebbed and flowed with the mood of the conversation. “I’m surprised you could be that silent, considering all the ruckus you’ve been making for the past four hours.” Crossing her arms, she leaned against the counter top while being careful not to disturb the pan on the stove. 

“By ruckus, do you mean a bass player and a drummer that know what they’re doing while the guitar player doesn’t?” 

“I suppose so.” She turned back to the stove, turning it off and bringing the pan over to the opposite counter to pour what looked to be meat into two bowls with fixings. She caught me watching her do this and must have noticed the confused look on my face, “We’re having taco salad Nikki. You’ll like it.” Reaching into the fridge, she grabbed a bottle of dressing and drizzled it across the two bowls before handing one to me. 

“So tell me, if this guitar player -” she motioned with her hand to indicate she didn’t know his name as she reached into a drawer for utensils.

“Greg”

“If Greg isn’t what you’re looking for, then why haven’t you called that guy from the newspaper ad?”

She was referring to an ad that I had shown her from the newspaper. Someone who described themselves as a “loud, rude and aggressive guitar player” had caught my eye. They listed a phone number, but after Tommy had mentioned Greg, I hadn’t thought to give them a call. 

“Well you see, Greg is a friend of Tommy’s from his old band” I figured I would cut the story off there and she would pick up on the rest. She snickered to herself. 

“You’re telling me that the man with jet black hair and a name like ‘Nikki Sixx’ is afraid to hurt Greg and Tommy’s feelings?” She motioned a tear running down her cheek while pouting and I scoffed at her. “Does Tommy know that Greg doesn’t fit your vibe?” She questioned, returning to her food. 

“He won’t say it cause Greg is there but yeah.” I said honestly, between bites. She nodded while continuing to chew on her food. 

“I didn’t hear a whole lot of singing going on down there tonight.” She looked over  at me expectantly, though I’m not quite sure what response it is she was looking for. “So it has been a little over a week, you’ve got a drummer you like and a guitar player you’re not so sure of and zero singer….” 

“Get to your point here Janis Jade Smith.” She laughed at how I had used her full name.

“Point is, when will I be attending this show of yours?” she was smirking but trying to hide it. Flipping her off, she laughed and we continued eating with one another in a comfortable silence.

Another week had passed since Tommy and Greg had arrived at my apartment, and things were  no better. I have little patience to begin with, but I had used it all on trying to teach Greg the way I wanted him to play. Sick of listening to me complain about the man, Janis told me that if I wasn’t going to pull the trigger and call the guy from the newspaper ad then she would. Before I had the time to process what was going on, Janis had left the apartment during the middle of dinner and returned 15 minutes later only to say “Sunday. He will be here at 4:00 pm sharp. If you like him, you tell Greg to hit the road.” So today, I was standing out on the balcony with Tommy letting him know the deal with this guy coming to audition. The faint sound of a bell caught my attention, knowing it was just before 4:00 I guessed that Janis woke up early. 

“That you up there Janis?” I called out, Tommy leaned over the railing to look up at the next floor. 

“Just came out to make sure that he shows up.” Answered my question.

“Listen man, how are we going to tell Greg to leave if we like this guy?” Tommy asked me as he moved his weight between each of his legs. If there was one thing I learned about Tommy in the short time since I had met him, it was that he had enough energy for the both of us. I could only guess that he’ll be a good partner in crime once the drinks are flowing. I shrugged my shoulders while smirking at him. 

“Act like you’re serving him a shot.” I heard a snicker above me as Tommy initially looked confused but then realized what I was getting at. 

“Give it to him straight..” Tommy mumbled under his breath as we watched a red car pull up in front of the apartment building. 

“Right on time!” Janis called out from above us. “Bring whoever is still around at 6:00 up for some dinner!” Sticking out a thumb over the railing, I heard Janis go back into her apartment as Tommy went down the stairs to help out the ad man with his equipment. I liked the looks of him, he almost resembled a slightly older version of me. 

By the time 6:00 rolled around, everyone was ready for a bit of a break. The guitarist that we kept was the man I came to know as Mick Mars, and we gave Greg the news as straight as it could be. If his ability to take news is anything like his drinking skills, I would say that he prefers mixed drinks. 

“Mick, my upstairs neighbour has offered to feed us dinner. You down for a break?” I asked him, knowing that Tommy already heard the offer.

“Why is your neighbour offering to feed us? I sure hope you aren’t taking charity because I don’t”

I know this apartment looks like a dump, but I’m not a charity case. 

“Janis and I have dinner together all the time. I’m not taking charity, I’m taking a free meal from a friend who is offering.” He appeared skeptical of my explanation. Glancing between the two of them, Tommy looked impatient. 

“I’m just hungry so do you think we can go?” Tommy asked. Motioning for the door, I began to walk out and up the stairs to Janis’s apartment. The three of us were rounding the corner to the landing where Crazy Train could be heard from her slightly ajar door. Glancing over my shoulder, I could see Mick and Tommy looking almost intrigued at this. Opening the door to the apartment, the usual bell alerted Janis to our arrival and she turned around with a pan in her hand. 

“Lasagna, salad and garlic bread tonight!” She exclaimed excitedly as she placed the baking sheet on the stove top. 

“It smells good Janis!” Tommy said as he bounded towards the kitchen, as he entered Janis handed him a plate and pointed towards the oven so he could grab himself garlic bread. 

“You must be the man from the ad that I talked to on the phone the other day.” She addressed Mick, who looked to be almost confused by the whole situation. Janis walked towards him from the kitchen with her hand extended, coming in to shake Mick’s hand. He returned the gesture and shook Janis’s hand. 

“Mick Mars.” 

“Loud, rude and aggressive guitar player. It’s nice to meet you. Janis Smith.” She began walking back into the kitchen, motioning for us to follow. We were each handed a plate and utensils while being told that we could grab a slice of garlic bread. Tommy had already planted himself on the couch in the living room, making himself at home.

“Anyone want something to drink?” She asked as Mick and I made our way to the couch in the living room. I noticed that there wasn’t going to be room on the couch for Janis, so I remained standing. Coming out from her bedroom, Janis dragged out a beanbag chair and placed it in front of the coffee table. I went to sit down on the chair when I was interrupted, “Sit on the couch Sixx, that’s mine.”

“Beer?” Tommy called out.

“One for everyone?” 

A collective yes was mumbled and Janis returned with 3 beers in one hand and her plate in the other. 

“Y’all sounded much better today. It was nice to finally hear those songs played correctly after listening to that sad sap try and keep up pace for the last week.” Now that Greg was gone, I think that Janis had given up putting on a good attitude about him. 

“We will sound even better once we have a singer.” Tommy replied, which started me on my train of thought. 

“Someone along the lines of David Lee Roth and Bowie!”

“So we want a skinny blonder fucker with moves?” Mick asked and I nodded, he was on the same train of thought. Sparing a quick glance over at Janis, she was eating quietly while watching the conversation. 

“I think I know who could be our guy!” Tommy exclaimed. 

Next Chapter

[mickmarstookmyheart]

Life's a Sick Joke pt 8

Pairing: Mick Mars x Reader

Would like to start from the very beginning? Great! Here is Part 1!

Sidenote: As this story is under construction, I would like to warn you that those chapters which don’t have a proper title are written in the main caharcter’s POV!! Be aware!!! Be awaaare! I hope you will enjoy this story as I did writing it, have a nice day and feel free to leave marks! 

8. Those screams

You hardly spoke on the way to the hotel. You didn't cry or show any emotion. You just felt emptiness. Just a void. The guys were all cute, they wanted to cheer you up, they acted goofy and funny. Tommy even lift you and put on his shoulders so fear took the place of sadness. Mick asked you several times if he could help but you told him that hardly. To make things a bit better, at the next concert you could finally take photos of these boys.

"Glad you are working now. I hated that guy from the last shows. He put his camera right in my face!" Vince said as he adjusted his costume on himself. You were waiting backstage to start the show.

"Yeah, man. He was rude and annoying." Tommy added while drumming on your head with his sticks.

"We just missed our little photographer chick." Nikki winked and placed his arm around your shoulders. "Anyway, where is your alien? The show can start at any moment now."

"I don't know. I will go and find him." As you were walking down the corridor you bumped into Doc.

"Hey, kiddo. Sorry I didn't see ya. All the boys are there?" He asked smiling.

"Mick hasn't shown up yet but I'm on it." Before you could start searching again he stopped you.

"Anyway, how are you doing?"

He looked in your eyes, not wanting to hear any lies.

"I'm okay. It doesn't hurt much." You pointed at your wound.

"I'm not talking about that. The boys told me about your brother. If you need some more time off..."

"Boss, I'm okay. Working helps me distract my thoughts. I appreciate it really and thank you. Now if you excuse me, I have to find the lead guitarist."

"If you say so, kiddo. You know where to find me." He smiled and you kept walking. When you arrived in his changing room, you saw him sitting on the couch and he had his eyes closed. You closed the door and quietly walked over on your toes to him. He looked so calm and vulnerable. His breath was slow and his lips were slightly opened.

You placed your hand on his shoulder and kissed his cheek. He opened one of his eyes and his lips curved into a smile.

"I couldn't think of any better way to wake me up."

"I know you love sleeping but the show must go on. They need you up there."

He grabbed your waist and pulled into his lap, so you were facing him. He looked down, you thought he wanted to avoid eye contact. "What's up, Mick? Is there a problem?" He just shook his head as a no. "Look into my eyes, please." You put your fingers under his chin so you could look into his eyes. "Tell me what's wrong. I'm fed up with lies."

"I...I am afraid." Well, you didn't expect that.

"From what?"

"I am afraid to go up there and play music. Those screams and chaos are still in my head....and I can't get rid of them."

"Oh, Mick. I didn't know. I'm so sorry." You hugged him tightly. "But if this makes things better, Doc hired 20 more security guards. Also, he made me even to wear a bullet-proof vest! I hate it but he threatened me that he will fire me if I won't wear it." You giggled.

"Mmm. You made me curious about that vest. Can you show me?" You snickered and shook your head.

"We don't have time for that." He pouted. "BUT maybe after the show, we can straight go to the hotel so I could show you that vest."

"I would love that," Mick muttered before he placed a kiss on your lips. He hugged you once more and rubbed small circles on your back. "I love you."

"I love you, too. And please tell me if something is going on. I want at least you, to be honest with me." You pointed at his chest. "Okay?"

"Agreed. And I'm sorry."

"Now enough." You put your hand over his mouth. "Let's go and rock this stadium!"

 ∆

"ARE YOU READY GUYS?" Vince shouted into the microphone. The crowd cheered back and you joined, too, after taking some shots of the audience. You also took some closeups from each of the boys. Mick looked concerned and you were a bit worried about him. "But before we start the concert, we have to discuss some things. First of all, I think all of you know what happened two weeks ago. We lost 6 of us. 6 fans who were enjoying our concert when that terrible thing happened. I must tell you that we will pay all of their funeral costs as our condolences." The whole crowd moved as one person and clapped. It was quite moving, to be honest, you even had to wipe a tear from my cheeks, you weren't that sensitive person. "But there is one person whom without we wouldn't be here tonight. The girl that saved my life. (Y/N) Cooper everyone!" He pointed at you and now all the lights were on you. "Come on the stage!" Vince demanded, waving at you with a big smirk on his face. You just shook your head but the crowd started shouting your name over and over. Doc also insisted to go up there so you approached the side of the stage and Nikki helped you climb there. You adjusted my tee and walked over to Vince shyly. You didn't like being in the center. You glanced at Mick who was still not in this world, he completely zoned out. Vince gave you the microphone and winked. You paralyzed.

"What do you want me to stay?" You covered it so the fans couldn't hear it.

"Anything you want. Something encouraging or just a joke. Your decision." He stepped aside and gave a thumb up. Nikki and Tommy were staring at each other smiling.

"Khm. Okay so hello Everyone. Are you ready to rock?" The crowd answered with a big yes. "Happy to hear that. Cause these boys worked so much on this music. Also, I would like to take the opportunity to thank the plenty of other people whom you can't see but you can see the results of their hard work. So let's make some fucking noise for them, too!" The audience went wild again. Vince leaned closer and spoke in the microphone.

"Do you guys have any questions for this beautiful lady? AND you can't ask her out for a date cause she is off-limits. She is with our alien, Mick Mars." Mick finally looked up when he heard his name. He looked at Vince and thought how the hell did you get on the stage. Not knowing the situation he just waved his hand. "So if you have a question ask it now!"

"Really, Vinnie?" You whispered to him while giving him a look.

"So what made you save Vince?" A guy shouted. "We heard rumors that you two weren't really on speaking terms." You shared a look with Vince.

"Well, you are right. But now we are talking and become friends, I guess?" You glanced at him, smiling.

"Best friends." He corrected me.

"So back to the question. What would've you done in my situation? You are in the middle of chaos and you are running for someplace to be safe but then you see that someone is incapable of hiding. So I did what I could. And I think this accident or this 4 days at the hospital gave me some time to reconsider things. We don't have time to waste. We never know when will our time end. We have to live in the present. Do what you want. Travel a lot, make new friendships, and gain experiences. Get yourself a guitar and learn to play it, or learn how to knot, not giving a shit it is for grandmas. So that's it. Thank you, guys!" You gave back the microphone and walked off the stage waving after Nikki gave you a high-five.

"That was a hell of a speech," Doc added when you arrived beside him.

"Thanks, I guess. I'm not a speech person and I just only said the truth. Nothing extra."

"It was still motivating. By the way, do you know what wrong is with Mick? He looks he is not here." Doc asked worrying about him.

"Umm, he is just tired. He was sleeping when I found him. Guess, he needs some time to rest." You lied. You didn't know if you should tell him the truth.

"I hope so."

The show rocked! They were all freaking good and after a couple of songs, Mick returned and connected with the fans. He also glanced at you several times and you always gave an encouraging smile back to him. When you were standing at his side between the stage and the cordon he always bent down and acted goofy in front of the camera, giving you the usual Mars face which you adored so much. After 30 minutes and taking hundreds of photos, you walked back to Doc. It was quite exhausting and you weren't in your best shape. Your wound hurt like hell and you were clutching at your side.

"Feeling all right?" Doc asked with concern in his eyes.

"I think I need to sit down a bit that's all." You muttered.

"You need to lie down. Go back and rest. And that's an order."

"But...I just need someone to bring a chair here." You insisted.

"No. You are going back and I will watch over the boys. Nothing bad will happen, I promise." He placed his hand on your shoulder.

"Okay, you are right. But call me if something happens." You pointed at him before leaving.

"Okay."

"Tommy, you are gonna wake her up, man," Nikki warned Tommy.

"She will kill you, you know that, right? Well, I should kill you for that." Mick muttered.

"Calm down, she won't find out who it was," Tommy said continuing drawing on your face.

"Won't, huh?" You asked back opening your eyes widely. Tommy dropped the pen and screamed.

"Please don't kill me!!! It was Nikki. Anyway, it was Vinnie's idea! I'm not guilty!! Haha, what I smell? It's a burger? It must be, I will bring you guys some, bye!" After rapping his plea he exited the room. You sat up and flinched from the pain. It was more bearable now although. You slowly stood up and walked over to the mirror to see what this man drew on your face.

"Happy Halloween? Seriously?" You snapped.

"Don't worry, you can wash it off. Not a permanent marker." Mick added to calm you down.

"Nah, it's cool. At least he could draw a witch on my face, too!" You pouted which made all the others shock.

"What?" You picked the marker up, leaned closer to the mirror, and drew a pentagram on your cheek.

"Now, it's good."

"Wow, that's sick, dude!" Nikki snickered, Vince just stepped behind you and looked into your eyes in the mirror.

"(Y/N), I'm proud of you. And I must say you are a true artist." He said in a serious tone. Mick just rolled his eyes.

"Fucking teenagers."

You turned to him and approached him, sat in his lap, and put the marker inches away from his face.

"If you dare to draw on my face with that..." He tried to threaten you drifting his face as far as possible.

"What will you do, huh? Mr. Mars?" You smirked. "You want an alien? Or a guitar?" You asked smiling and looking into his eyes not moving the pen away.

"Ooohohh (Y/N) can I get a guitar, please?" Nikki pouted like a child.

"Of course, Sixx. Vinnie?" You glanced at the singer.

"Oh, no, thanks. I won't let my face ruined with that chemical thing." He waved his head, letting his hair fall back like a queen. You smirked at Mick and put a quick kiss on his lips.

"Be right back." You stood up and held the pen like a knife in your hand, pointing at Vince. You grinned at him who was stepping back and searched for the knob of the door.

"Don't come any closer, (Y/N)."

"Boo!" He screamed and left the room like T-Bone.

"Pussy." Nikki and you said at the same moment. You shared a look just before you high-fived.

Tags: @cmft-jr-winchester @leatherandheels​ @karrotkate​ 

I don't know where this Halloween theme came from but if the world is upside down then my story can be upside down.

Next chapter

[astrophysicist-guitar-god]

Thanks for the tag, @imalososos!

nickname: fox (foxmonkey is my main blog)

zodiac: Libra!

height: 5′1″

hogwarts house: Gryffindor

last thing i googled: "rumpled bed” images for a story

song stuck in my head: Well, thanks for that. ;-) Ooh! “Wheelie Mammoth” an outro from a Bob’s Burgers episode. It is the cutest, I wish it were longer. Conveniently linked so you can listen. It’s like, 30 seconds. Go ahead, treat yourself.

number of followers: 180, ooh!

amount of sleep: I’m currently working from home (and loving it, I feel guilty to say; I know how fortunate I am)...anyway, I clock in early, and I like a little me time before I start my day. I usually get up between 3:30 a.m. and 4:00 a.m. I usually get between 5-6 hours if I’m lucky.

lucky number:  17 possibly? No idea why.

dream job: I’m gonna go back in time and be a roadie for Queen. But since I’m short and weak, I’ll have to be one of those Mary Sue roadies who ends up charming everyone and eventually ends up being like, unofficially One of the Band (TM). I’ll be like one of the infamous fifth Beatles, except I’ll be the fifth Queen. It’ll be awesome.

wearing: JAMMIES. It’s been nonstop jammie-time at my house since March.

favorite song: I have way too many. “It’s Late” and “Prophet’s Song” are faves by Queen; “Comfortably Numb” and “Learning to Fly” are faves by Pink Floyd; “Kashmir” and “All of my Love” are my Led Zep faves...”Little Wing” is my fave by Jimi Hendrix; “Movement” by Hozier sends me spinning into the next dimension, his voice is absolutely amazing; “Cast Your Fate to the Wind” by the Vince Gueraldi Trio is sooo nice (he did the music for the old Charlie Brown specials, give it a listen if you like gently jazzy piano); “Never My Love” by the Association, my God I love that song...”I See the Rain” by Marmalade is from the 60s and is a new favorite. “Talk of the Town” by the Pretenders; “Uninvited” by Alanis Morrisette; “On the Mend” by Foo Fighters (so gorgeous);  “Potions” by Puscifer; “Passive” by A Perfect Circle makes me lose my mind, their minor key cover of “Imagine” is one of my favorite covers of anything ever...“Dolphin’s Cry” by Live; “Sour Girl” by Stone Temple Pilots...oooh, “Hallelujah” and “Home” by Hothouse Flowers (NOT the Hallelujah you’re thinking of, go listen)...and that’s just the tippy tippy tippy tippy tip of the tip of the iceberg. There’s so much good music in the world. Oooh, and “Arabian Dance” from the Nutcracker is just stunningly beautiful -- this orchestral performance is literally perfection.

favorite instrument: Piano because I took lessons; guitar, and I can appreciate a slammin’ bass...drums (John Bonham and Roger Taylor are favorites). Violin is very nice.

aesthetic: LOTS of books, CDs, DVDs; barefoot in warmer months, socks when it’s cold out, going shoeless as much as I can, flats preferred when shoes must be worn; cats; art from the thrift store (I had the BEST random art wall in my old apartment, but my current house has plaster walls, and no); v-necks, skirts, sheer black hose, pearls... When going out (and by out, I mean outside of the house, whether it’s work, an event, etc.), lipstick and earrings always.

favorite author: Stephen King, and Emily Dickinson for poetry

favorite animal noise: the little vocalizations that cats make, the little mrrrp? and the chirps are so cute.

random fact: scatterbrained but fun, worst memory on the planet (I’ve been told on  two separate occasions that I have brain like a seive, and/or that I  have a memory like Swiss cheese); given my memory issues, I am extremely  good at times, at Knowing Where Things Are. I’m also really good at guessing (within a few minutes) what time it is without looking  at a clock, and not like the o’ clock times, but, 4:17, 2:38...odd  times. My brother and I can talk about music and music-related memories for hours. I own about a hundred tubes of lipstick (conservative estimate). Around 20 are (were) in my current rotation before lockdown happened.

tagging: this is why tagging games break down when I’m involved, because I never know who to tag. So, if you’re seeing this and you want your followers to know interesting things about you, go for it! :)

[blue-fidelity]

Can I have a Mötley Crüe and The Dirt ship please?...if you're still doing them. I'm 24, 5'7", with blue green grey eyes and fairly pale skin. (My avatar pic is of me if it helps). I love grunge, rock, and metal music, painting, playing sports/working out, writing, and reading. I play saxophone, am learning ukulele, and I work in computer programming. I'm very sarcastic, quick witted, one of the guys, and am super introverted to the point where I come off as bitchy but I really care a lot.

Hiya love 💗! I hope you like your ship 😘!

Mötley Crüe 🖤:

Mick Mars

Your personalities are so similar honestly. I can see both of you making quick witted sarcastic remarks to the rest of the boys together all the time. Speaking of the rest of the boys, they think you're a badass and probably hit on you more than once. This did not make Mick happy. He thinks it’s really cool that you play the saxophone, and actually wants to learn ukulele with you (he thinks it’ll help him with his guitar playing). You care for Mick so much, as he does for you. You like helping him write songs, not necessarily for the band. Mick has a lot of softer songs he wrote with you, and you guys love to play them on the ukulele together. You’ve painted a lot of portraits of him, he thinks it’s flattering. You and Mick find a book to read together, and just spend time cuddling while reading. Y’all are pretty sweet and I’m living for it.

The Dirt Cast ❤️:

Daniel Webber

Daniel seems like a sweet, down to earth kinda closed off guy. He loves your sarcasm and quick witted personality, thinking it’s actually quite attractive. Since you're pretty introverted, Daniel will definitely encourage you to open up a bit. He doesn’t consider you bitchy at all. He loves that you play the saxophone (he thinks it’s groovy, lol). Let’s face it, anyone who plays the ukulele is precious, and he thinks you're adorable for it. You help him with his lines all the time. During the filming of The Dirt, it was hard to pay attention because, let’s face it, Daniel was frickin hot as Vince. You also paint a lot of portraits of him, once you took one of the photos of you guys and painted it, it now hangs over your bed in your guys shared place. Daniel definitely seems like he loves reading, so he loves to read with you. Overall just a really cute couple.

[propertyofnikkisthighs]

Afraid Ch. 4

Warnings: None

1988

“I can’t believe you volunteered to go to Canada with Motley Crue of all people” Sam sighed laying down on my bed.

“Ugh can we not remind me.” I had only been out of rehab for a week and we were needing to fly to Vancouver tomorrow to start on the boy’s newest album. Alarik purred as he pranced around our heads, poor guy had no idea I was leaving again and for longer this time.

“You fell for that good ol’ Nikki Sixx charm didn’t you?” Sam snickered and I shoved her lightly.

“I did not. I am going because it is my job and may be my only chance to go to Canada. Also Mick Mars.” I didn’t want to admit to her or myself that Nikki had me in his grasp. I was whipped by his green eyes.

“Pfft. I saw the way you two looked at each other when I picked you up from rehab. You two are totally gonna bone.” Sam sat up suddenly. “Wait! Did you pack sexy clothes?”

“Uh no? Cause we aren’t gonna ‘bone’ there or ever” I scoffed. Okay, maybe I threw in a pair or two of lacy panties.

“Nope. Get in the car we need to get you lingerie now.” Sam jumped up grabbing her purse and keys and started towards the door and once Sam had decided something you couldn’t tell her no.

I fingered through the rack of corsets at the second sex shop we had gone to since the first one had been a bust. Nothing screamed ‘Nikki’ at me and I was getting frustrated with not only the piss poor selection, but also with Sam for making me do this, and myself for even looking for something to appeal to Nikki fucking Sixx.

“Sam this is so stupid. This is Nikki Sixx we’re talking about here, he would fuck a breakfast burrito if it had on eyelashes and a skirt.” I sighed annoyed with the events of today.

“Key word is would babes” Sam winked “You would be surprised how high of standards you actually have when you don’t have drugs clouding your brain.”

“If you’re so dead set on this why don’t you fuck him?” I made my way to the second to last rack in the shop ready to call it quits.

“I would never. Besides, he gives you such piercing ‘fuck me’ eyes it’s my civic duty to try to get you guys to bone.” Sam joined me at the rack I was thumbing through and held up a small school girl outfit. “Can’t go wrong with this classic?”

“No I want something that screams original.” I flipped through and felt leather “Wait.” I pulled up a bra harness that crossed over the top in the shape of a pentagram paired with a black lacy thong that had a similar garter harness.

“Oh that’s definitely the one!” Sam squealed clapping. “Quick go try it on and see if it fits!” She pushed me into the dressing room with such force I almost slammed into the wall. I removed my clothes and slipped into the lingerie set admiring the way it accentuated my body. My cleavage bubbled slightly at the top in a flattering way and I was almost turning myself on looking at me. I quickly changed back into my regular clothes and grabbed my newest favorite lingerie set.

“So?!” Sam questioned excitedly

“This is the one!” I smiled heading up to the counter and placed the outfit in front of the older woman behind the register.

“Oh this is beautiful. You got a lucky fella.” She smiled ringing it up when Sam set the school girl outfit on the counter as well.

“Trust me on this you will thank me later” Sam said holding her hand up when I started to protest.

I paid for my outfits and we made our way back to Sam’s car. I didn’t want to admit it, but the new outfits had me actually looking forward to waking up early to take this flight now. Even if Nikki and I didn’t have anything happen between us (not that I wanted that or anything) the outfits could always be worn for someone else. I lit a cigarette as Sam drove in the direction of my apartment and sighed thinking about all the future possibilities I had now that I was sober and on a good path.

“What are you smiling at? Thinking of Nikki?” Sam teased.

“Not everything is about Nikki you brat” I laughed “No I’m just….happy to have a clear mind you know?”

“I’m happy for you” Sam smiled and patted my thigh.

“Thank you” I smiled back at her.

“Happy you’re gonna finally get laid.” I smacked her hand as she let out a loud laugh and gave my thigh a gentle squeeze.

“You’re lucky you’re my only friend or I would be hanging out with someone else right now” I was really going to miss her stupid teasing while in Vancouver.

I pulled my sunglasses down my nose as I waited on the tarmac for the private jet Motley had coming to get them and watched as Tommy and Vince held onto and kissed their wives. I couldn’t help but feel slightly bad for them, but then when I thought about it I remembered this is Motley Crue and there’s no way these women didn’t know they were marrying whores. I caught Mick rolling his eyes at the displays of affection and couldn’t help the giggle that tumbled from my lips.

“What has you so chummy this morning?” Nikki said suddenly at my side.

“Nothing now that you’re here” I flicked my eyes at him before pushing my sunglasses up my nose again.

“Ouch, you really know how to cut a man deep babe” Nikki feigned hurt clutching his heart.

“I am sure you will move on” I rolled my eyes despite him being unable to see me do so.

“Come on I thought we were friends now” Nikki threw an arm around my shoulders and I felt my cheeks become warm with blush.

“We are coworkers” I chuckled, but I didn’t shrug him off of my shoulders.

“I will get you to admit that we are friends and you enjoy my company by the time this album is over” He laughed pulling me a little closer to him.

“(Y/N)!” Tommy yelled walking toward us “Dude this album is gonna be so sick I can feel it” He high fived Nikki and pulled me into a hug. I learned early on that Tommy was a hugger and my protests would go unheard so I gave up and allowed him to hug me long ago.

“Hey Tommy” My voice came out muffled as he had me squeezed to him. He finally released me and flashed me his signature smile.

“I already have some things written and in mind that I can show you on the plane. Speaking of.” Nikki gestured to the private jet that was now ready and waiting for them to board.

We made our way onto the plane and the boys took what appeared to be already determined spots getting themselves comfortable. I walked towards the farthest end of the plane, but Nikki pulled me into the seat next to him.

“Hey I was trying to sit back and read my book” I protested.

“Well you can still sit back and read your book next to your friend” Nikki smirked and leaned over clipping the seat belt over my lap. “Safety first” he winked.

“Kill me now” Mick grumbled and settled into his seat closing his eyes.

Once we were up in the air Nikki brought out his guitar and began showing Tommy and Mick a few notes and lyrics that he had gotten together. I tried to focus solely on my book, but I couldn’t help but try to listen in on their conversations regarding the song Nikki was showing them.

“So I was thinking we could call it ‘Kickstart My Heart’ and it’s just like all these things that make us feel alive that isn’t cocaine” Nikki explained to the boys.

“Okay so what could be compared to skydiving naked from an airplane?” Mick mused over in his mind.

“Well what about something about chicks man? Chicks always make me feel alive.” Tommy laughed and I snorted accidentally giving myself away as listening.

“Something you want to add here babe?” Nikki smirked at me.

“Maybe I do” I said snatching the lyrics out of his hand.

When I get high I get high on speed

Top fuel funny car’s a drug for me

Always got the cops coming after me

Custom built bike doing 103

Skydive naked from and aeroplane

“So this song is about adrenaline, right? Well what about a woman gives you a rush?” I questioned the boys handing the lyrics back to Nikki.

“A kick ass body” Tommy laughed. “Nice big tits. Something out of this world.”

“A lady with a body from outer space?” I rolled my eyes, these guys were ridiculous why did I agree to this?

“Wait. I like the way that sounds.” Nikki scribbled some more on the sheet with the lyrics and I tried to return back to my book and pray the flight would be over soon enough. I was finally able to tune the boys out and focus on my book when I felt a weight on my shoulder. I turned my head to see Nikki resting his head on my shoulder with the arm rest that was between us now pushed up. The seats were spacious enough that he didn’t need to rest his head on me and he could’ve reclined his seat, so I knew he was just trying to annoy me. I did my best to ignore him and continue reading my book, but with every movement of his head his hair would tickle my neck and face.

“Can I help you?” I asked slamming my book shut.

“No I was just getting comfy.” He flashed his stupid cute smirk at me and I felt my face heat up again. I hated that he had this power over me.

“You’re being extra annoying today Nikki Sixx” I muttered under my breath deciding I might as well give up on reading my book.

“You shouldn’t speak to your friends that way.” He propped his chin on my shoulder and I looked at him from the corner of my eye. He really was already looking better compared to the strung out Nikki I had first met, hell even compared to the Nikki I met the first day of rehab he looked better. Without thinking I reached up and stroked his cheek lightly with my finger tips. He drew a sharp breath and that seemed to make me regain my senses and I pulled my hand away like I had been burned. Luckily Nikki didn’t comment on the action and the rest of the flight was silent as he nodded out against my shoulder. I must have fallen asleep too because the next thing I knew we were landing in Vancouver and the boys were grabbing all their stuff they had brought on the plane with them.

“We couldn’t get a big enough car to carry all of you together and your shit since we brought an extra” Doc said gesturing my way “So you’ll have to figure out how to separate yourselves”

“(y/n) and I will ride together” Nikki said tugging me toward a black SUV not giving me room to argue.

“But-” Tommy started.

“Come on T-Bone you too” Nikki called behind him and Tommy gladly galloped to your sides.

“I just wanted to ride with Mick for some peace and quiet for once” I groaned before climbing into our designated car with the boys while the driver packed all our things into the trunk.

“You gotta lighten up” Tommy laughed before brandishing a flask. “Here. Take a sip of this Jack it’ll help you loosen up.”

“Tommy we literally just got out of rehab” I quirked an eyebrow.

“Yeah for drugs, not alcohol”

Well who was I to argue with that logic. And with a shrug from Nikki we all passed the small flask around enjoying the slight burn from the whiskey.

[citylightsbooks]

5 Questions with Megan Fernandes, Author of Good Boys

Megan Fernandes is a writer and academic living in New York City. She is the author of The Kingdom and After (Tightrope Books 2015) and the new book of poems, Good Boys (published by Tin House). Her work has been published or is forthcoming in the New Yorker, Tin House, Ploughshares, Denver Quarterly, Chicago Review, Boston Review, Rattle, Pank, the Common, Guernica, the Academy of American Poets, and McSweeney's Internet Tendency, among others. She is a poetry reader for The Rumpus and an Assistant Professor of English at Lafayette College. She holds a PhD in English from the University of California, Santa Barbara and an MFA in poetry from Boston University. She reads from her new book Good Boys with special guests at City Lights Bookstore on Tuesday, February 25th.

***

City Lights: If you’ve been to City Lights before, what’s your memory of the visit? If you haven’t been here before, what are you expecting?

Megan Fernandes: Of all the places I’m reading this Spring (and it’s probably not politic to say this), I am most excited to read at City Lights. I’ve never been, but I understood at a very young age that the bookstore symbolized possibility, spontaneity, digression, lostness, community, etc. As a teenager, I read a lot of Beat literature, my favorites being Dharma Bums, In the Night Café, and everything Ginsberg. I was compelled by their portraits of America’s expansiveness. And I also just think as an immigrant kid not born in the USA, the Beats gave me some sense of American geography. I went to Colorado for the first time last year and I had this memory of my first impression of Colorado as a place described in On the Road. When traveling across the country, I often have Ferlinghetti’s feverish, twitchy, carnivalesque poetics in my head. I also think in this indirect way, Beat literature shaped some of my thoughts around feminist thinking as I was conscious of my orientation as outside certain privileges of the “male, womanizing adventurer” often romanticized in Beat lit. I had to interrogate what it meant to feel intimacies with Ginsberg and Duncan who were destabilizing masculinities and cultural logics of hate. 

And so what I learned from City Lights and Beat lit is really something about the relationship between myth-making and counter-culture communities. I’m understanding the truly expansive network of the movement in so much more detail right now while reading an advanced copy of a fabulous new book called The Beats: A Literary History by Steven Belletto. 

What are you reading right now?

I’m reading a book called Dapper Dan: Made in Harlem, co-written by Dapper Dan himself and my good friend, Mikael Awake. It’s a history of Dapper Dan’s iconic work in fashion, of course, while being really intimate. And it’s just as much a history of his family’s internal dynamics and, through his family, New York City at large. In particular, 1970’s NYC is so vividly, brilliantly wrought in this book.

There’s this one section where Dap is at Iona College at a lecture on protohistory and the professor, a Czech immigrant, tells the class that “In order for man to have survived during those ancient times… he must have had powers that he doesn’t have now. The only people that could possibly still have these powers today are the black and brown people on the planet” and when Dap hears this, he is transfixed. He says: “This is one of the most esteemed scholars at Iona College telling a packed lecture hall that black and brown people were the only ones on the planet who still had spiritual powers. How come this was my first time hearing about that? I looked around. I was the only black student in the class. I wasn’t tired anymore. He had my full attention… I said to myself, This is what I need to know. This is how I need to formulate myself.” I’m loving how the book captures these intense moments of transformation. I love that word choice: formulate. What poetic agency is modeled in that word? I needed that word the moment I read it. 

Recently, I’ve also read Samiya Bashir’s Field Theories and Edgar Kunz’s Tap Out. Samiya wrote this legitimately weird and imaginative book that feels like it’s made out of the time-space continuum. Some cosmic materiality is really showing up in that book. I remember this line: “A body. A zoo. A lovely savannah. Walls of clear, clean glass” and I’m just on a ride with the musicality of her shifting assonance. Plus, I know that writers like June Jordan and Toni Cade Bambara are operating influences/specters of the book and you can feel that energy. Edgar’s book is more narrative and quieter, but so devastating. I sort of get what makes his speakers tenderize if that makes sense. I think it’s the same phenomena that tenderizes me, too.

Some of my favorite novels of recent years includes A Questionable Shape by Bennett Sims, The Small Backs of Children by Lidia Yuknavitch, Sonora by Hannah Lillith Assadi, and very recently, The Nickel Boys by Colson Whitehead.

What book or writer do you always find yourself recommending?

I think Jean Toomer’s Cane is the most beautiful book of the 20th century. I remember just being blown away by its call and response, the repeating imagery of sun and smoke and pines. That book is so stunning. Other astounding work that I always recommend includes Mebvh McGuckian’s Captain Lavender, Anne Carson’s The Autobiography of Red, Evie Shockley’s The New Black, Franz Wright’s Walking to Martha’s Vineyard, Eleni Sikelianos’ Body Clock, Jorie Graham’s The Errancy, Bhanu Kapil’s The Vertical Interrogation of Strangers, The Collected Poems of W.B. Yeats, and Galway Kinnell and Hannah Liebmann’s translations of Rilke. Those are my hard-hitters. Those books are why I became a poet. 

What writers/artists/people do you find the most influential to the writing of this book and/or your writing in general?

You know, I collected poems while I was writing and editing this book. And I think those specific poems created a kind of constellation around me, almost protective, that kept me writing. Some of those poems include “The Long Recovery” by Ellen Bass, “A Matter of Balance,” by Evie Shockley, “What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why” by Edna St. Vincent Millay, “I am Not Seaworthy” by Toni Morrison, “Becoming Regardless” by Jack Spicer, “A New Bride Almost Visible in Latin” by Jack Gilbert, “To the Young Who Want to Die” by Gwendolyn Brooks and many, many others. Definitely O’Hara as well. He never leaves me. The most important poem of that little self-curated archive is Frank Bidart’s “Visions at 74” where he writes: “To love existence / is to love what is indifferent to you.” I remember reading that line and just losing it. I have been guided by so much of Bidart. And maybe my book is a little bit about how to sustain rage in the face of that which is indifferent to you, what cannot love you (both personally and abstractly). How do you sustain rage so as to not fall into despair?

I also listened to a variety of music while writing and editing. A mix between contemporary sad kid hip-hop, old school jazz and blues, gospel, 80’s bands, pop culture queens, 1970’s hypnotic modal vamp, classical Spanish guitar, electronic pop, really pretty varied. A few names that come to mind: KOTA the Friend, NoName, Vince Staples, Travis Scott, Miles Davis Quintet, Bessie Smith, Sam Cooke, The Knocks, Solange, Archie Shepp, Pharoah Sanders, Alice Coltrane, Big Mama Thornton, Miriam Makeba, Kamasi Washington, Thompson Twins, Misfits, Bowie, Talking Heads, Tears for Fears, Cher, Whitney Houston, Portishead, Goldfrapp, Memphis Slim, Dinah Washington, Alberto Iglesias, Gustavo Santaolalla, Holychild, Blood Orange, etc.

If you opened a bookstore, where would it be located, what would it be called, and what would your bestseller be?

My grandpa played violin on a ship that sailed between Tanga, Tanzania and Goa, India. I never had the chance to meet him. He died when my dad was sixteen, but I always thought about what that journey might have looked and felt like, its many hardships, but also the wonder of gazing out at the sea playing strings. For that reason, I’d love to open a bookstore that focused specifically on Indian Ocean diaspora and sold books exclusively by authors working, uncovering, or investigating the literature of that oceanic rim. I think there is something rich in thinking about books not necessarily focused on nation-statehood but thinking more about a kind of social-imaginary with a literature that is messy in its conceptualization and crosses, migrates, misses, and mythologizes across many cultures over generations. You could have sections on food, underwater exploration, piracy, long-distance intimacy, trade routes, empire, transnational feminism. I like the idea of a bookstore that is anti-genre and instead, organized by associative thinking and imagination. It would be a logistical nightmare. You would never find what you were looking for, but you might find something you didn’t know existed.

So yes, I’d vote for a little homegrown network of bookstores in India, East Africa, and actually, maybe one of them in Lisbon which is a city that has a long (and problematic) history with the Indian Ocean. I’ve spent a lot of time in Lisbon the past eight years of my life, spending time visiting family and researching the history of the Portuguese empire especially as it relates to my family history (my folks are third generation East African Portuguese colonized Indians). I have a lot of conflicting homelands which is a way of saying that there are times when I feel like I have nothing but a rootless present. That’s something I investigate in my work, that weird (a)temporality. And I’m drawn to the particular light of Lisbon which is quite unusual. I’d call the bookstore “Malaika” which means “Angel” in Swahili and is the favorite folk song of my parents who grew up in Tanzania. I like the idea of a bookstore in Lisbon with the name in Swahili run by a Goan-Canadian-American woman. That’s the world I grew up in… one of multiplicities. 

[celestica-1988]

As Always

TheDirtNikkiSixxXFemaleReader.

Requested: Yes, by anonymous. Sorry fr the delay, I hope you like it.

“ If you're taking requests for the Netflix movie The Dirt, can I get a Nikki Sixx one-shot where the reader's a singer but a solo artist instead of in a band and she's been Nikki's girlfriend since he was in his band London and he forms Mötley Crüe and the band becomes famous and the reader becomes famous too and she drinks but doesn't do drugs and then Nikki overdoes on heroin like in the movie and it's a mix of angst and fluff?“

You were there since the beginning, even before Mötley Crüe existed.

You always been side by side with Nikki Sixx since day zero and you could remember everything that happened very well.

It was a stormy night, the noise of the rain on the roof was made to recall memories, especially now that things were so uncertain. Nikki presence in your life was so uncertain.

1978.

You remember like it was yesterday how you noticed that young homeless boy with long black hair and leather jacket. You were eighteen, he was around the same age as you. You watched him sleeping on the benchs of the park next to your apartment and you didn’t find the guts to talk to him.

In a rainy night like this one you finally asked him if he wanted to sleep in your house for a night. That was the beginning, your beginning. Nikki never left your house, you become friends and then one night he told you that he loved you, your heart started to beat faster, but it was natural answer “me too”.

You had so much in common: you both spent your teenage years in a foster home, you both have a difficult relationship with your parents and authorities, you both dreamed to hit the big time in music.

Nikki dreamed to create a band who would break the ground and give people something that they never saw before. You were a skilled singer who could also play guitar, you loved Janis Joplin and wanted to do a solo carrier.

Together you encouraged each other.

1981

The year in which Mötley Crüe was created.

At the time Nik was playing in a band called London, but he wasn’t happy. He kept having arguments with the singer, till one evening they fought on the stage. You knew that for Nikki London were over after this and you weren’t wrong. You were sitting in a bar and he was looking for band members on a local music paper.

“I wanna have my own band so I can decide the music I wanna play, Y/N.

I wanna create something new, Y/N. A show who will shock people.”

You nodded and caressed his hair, he had some tissue in the nose due to the fight. At some point a tall and lanky boy with long dark hair showed up to your table. He kept twirling drumsticks and he was a fan of Nikki, you could tell when he said he had a London’s poster. He was like a puppy, Nikki asked him where he learned the drumsticks’ trick, he said he learned it in the school’s band, but he said he did rock too.

And so you found your drummer kid.

After a while Mick came to your apartment and became the guitarist. There were a guy before him, but as much as he tried he didn’t fit with the band’s sound.

The last one was Vince. He was a Tommy’s friend who was already playing in a cover band, you went to a party and gave him a tape with your songs and the phone number. You were sure he would never call, but he did. He and his girlfriend came to the apartment and his voice was the last piece, now the band was complete.

1983.

Mötley Crüe carrier skyrocketed and so you had time to think about yours.

You followed Nikki in the first tour with Ozzy Osbourne, it was funny: parties after every concert, cocaine, alcohol, sex with Nikki.

All these thing made you happy, but on the long run they weren’t enough for you.

So you let him do his own thing.

You kept supporting and loving him, but you stepped back and in some ways you found your balance.

You lived in a mansion with him, when he was at home you spent quality time with him, it was like the time had stopped for you in those day. You and Nikki were still in such a bubble that you ignored the fact that he was too much cocked or drunk.

In the meantime a talent scout noted you while you were playing in a Hollywood local.

You were put under a contract and started to record an album. It was pop music, but still with a rock influence, it was okay. The only thing that bothered you was that you were forced to keep your relationship with Nikki a secret. Your contract said clearly that you should appear single at the eye of the public; least at the beginning, moreover a relationship with such problematic rockstar would not help you in any way according to your manager.

Nikki found it funny, the secret made everything more exciting to him.

So the time you spent together become more and more important and put you two in a bubble.

The bubble burst when one night you found Nikki in the wardrobe with a gun in his hand, shaking, next to him there were a syringe, a tie, a piece of something, a lighter and a bend spoon.

It was heroin, he was addicted to it and you didn’t even noticed.

It was 1985.

You felt a complete idiot.

……………………………………………………

Two years after you were sure idiot was the right word to describe you.

You were a hopeless idiot, who lived for the day Nikki finally would be free from drugs.

The last two years were difficult. The first thing you do was confront Nikki about heroin and why he took such a dangerous drug.

The answer shocked you, it was because heroin gave him that sense of being loved that he didn’t experienced during his childhood. You would ask him why you weren’t enough but you swallowed the question.

Deana started to call Nikki to make things worse and after every call he shot heroin in his vein, you never hated anyone more than his mother. One time you were so done that you smashed the answering machine against the wall. You didn’t want to hear her anymore, you didn’t want Nikki hear her anymore and suffer. His pained expression broke your heart, the tears and then the heroin killed you slowly.

What could you do to stop him?

You talked about it countless times, he always apologized but never said he would do something like rehab, there were some method in the way he was destroying himself and you were frustrated that you couldn’t do anything.

You grew to hate the contract that gave you fame and fans because it didn’t let you move freely on the heroin question. Roadshows were unbearable, you were scared that you would read that Nikki was dead or overdosed.

Even in happy moments Nikki needed drugs: he was completely drugged at Tommy and Heather wedding and you couldn’t stop him.

He was out of control and it seemed you were the only one worried about it

None of the Crüe were doing anything, Tommy said that maybe Nikki liked to stay there, but you couldn’t accept it. You were willing to fight, but he wasn’t.

You sighed thinking about your last fight: once again you found a syringe and Nikki was high of heroin.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I can’t help it, I need heroin.

I need to…”

“Feel loved?  Than what am I to you?

I fucking love you, Nikki, I fucking love you before this band circus didn’t even exist, still you said you need to feel loved?

What the fuck should I do?

What the fuck is our relationship?

Do you even love me now?

Because I fucking love you and I’m fucking tired to not know what to do to help you.

Tell me something!”

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” Sorry was the word he used most with you, he was sorry for everything but not willing to change.

“I think I need to reach the rock bottom before doing something, I can’t stop myself, Y/N.”

“Do you know what is the rock bottom? Fucking dying!

How could you do something after you are dead? Nikki, for God sake, let me help you.” He shook his head and that was how the conversation ended.

Now you were with your head in your hands, thinking and thinking about him.

You decided to turn on TV and the news you received was your worst nightmare: Nikki was dead by overdose.

You screamed like an animal, kicked everything you can, smashed things: everything not to think about the fact he was no longer on earth.

You could never talk to him again, nor kissed him or told him you loved him.

He was gone and your last memory of him was you two fighting and his pained expression, why didn’t you just kiss him and make love?

How could you ever know that it was the last time you would see him?

You cried your heart out, you watched your bloody hands and thought that if Nikki were there he surely would kiss them and said some nice words.

But he wasn’t.

He would never kissed you again.

You started to break stuff another time, than you curled up in the debris, holding and smelling one of the Nikki’s t-shirt you stole to him.

It was the fucking end.

It was the fucking rock bottom.

It fucking hurt like hell.

………………..

Some times later you heard the footsteps of someone.

“Y/N?”

Called a voice, it was Tommy.

“Where are you?” “I’m here.” You said in a low tone, Tommy reached you and he kneeled beside you.

“He’s dead, Tommy.

Fucking dead. And the last time we met we fought about heroin, I would give the world just to tell him that I love him.”

Your voice was raspy.

“Y/N, he is alive.”

“Are you kidding me?”

You got up and gave a deadly look at Tommy, he got up too.

“He was declared dead on the ambulance, his heart stopped, but he was revived by a paramedic.

He used two shot of adrenaline and Nikki woke up, he’s in the hospital now and I thought you wanted to see him.” “Is it true, Tommy?”

“Yes, come with me.”

“Sure.” You ran to the door and Tommy followed you.

You jumped in his car and he hurried to reach you. He started the car and you still couldn’t’ believe it was true. You needed to see him to be sure it was real, that Nikki was real.

You didn’t say a word during the drive, your fingers kept tapping nervously.

Finally you were at the hospital, you followed Tommy and you ended up in front of a white door.

“He’s in that room.” “Yes.”

You swallowed your anxiety and fears and you opened it.

Nikki was laying on the bed with his eyes open, you ran to him and then kneeled next to the bed.

You took his hand in yours and kissed it while you were crying.

“You are alive. You are fucking alive, thank God.

I’m so happy.”

Your head lowered on the hands, you felt Nikki’s other hand caressing your hair.

“You are a fucking idiot, but I love you more than my life.

Don’t scare me like that anymore, please.” “Y/N… I love you too, please, kiss me.”

You got up and kissed him softly and slowly, you felt him smile against your lips.

“When I was dying I was thinking about you and to all the shit I put you in.

You always stayed and never left, I don’t deserve you.” “Nikki…”

“But… I guess this is my rock bottom. I can’t lose you because of my own stupidity, I don’t wanna see you cry again for me.

Y/N, I wanna go to rehab and try to fix my life.”

You kissed him again.

“I will be by your side.

Always.”

He smiled.

“You always been…” “And I always will be.” You kissed him again and again.

You meant every single word you said, Nikki was willing to live finally and you weren’t going anywhere.

You two would be together.

As always.

[the--blackdahlia]

Too Young to Fall in Love Chapter 3 (Dirt!Nikki x Reader)

Title: Too Young to Fall in Love 3

Summary: Nikki Sixx was a hard partying musician on the strip. He never expected to fall in love with anyone, until a girl knocked on his dressing room door looking for a ride home and took his breath away. Just like everything else Nikki did; the drugs, the money, the music; Nikki went hard with love. (Y/n) Bass never expected the bassist of Motley Crue to be the one to shake her calm and calculated life up. She had a plan. Graduate school, become an epic producer, and watch from behind the scenes as her brother’s band rose to fame. Nikki and (Y/n) were perfect for each other, too bad her brother, Tommy, didn’t think so.

Series Warnings:  Smut (18+ Please), drug use, language, referenced miscarriage, drug overdose, mentioned attempted suicide, out of character moments for everyone in the band, the timeline might be a little screwy but it’s fanfiction! I know nothing of music production and my medical knowledge is really screwy, so it won’t be accurate.

AN: Check out other chapters and more on my Patreon!

“Do you see your girlfriend?” Tommy teased as Nikki peered around the curtain out to the crowd. “Maybe she realized what your face looked like and decided to stay home?”

Vince smacked Tommy upside his head, "they met yesterday moron! She knows what he looks like."

“She could’ve been drunk. I have a tendency to think everyone looks really hot when I’m drunk.” Tommy offered with a shrug. Nikki was about to let the curtain fall closed when he swore he spotted her in the crowd wearing an Aerosmith t-shirt. “Come on my dudes. It’s time to play!”

"He saw something he liked," Mick drawled as he grabbed his guitar.

“Mick, you’re supposed to be on my side man.” Nikki said as he got his bass. “Are you guys ready?”

Tommy twirled his from sticks, "let's rock and roll!"

They headed out and played their set, getting screams and cheers. A girl ran on the stage and kissed Vince at one point. Nikki scanned the crowd, looking for (Y/n). Once the set was over, Nikki went to find her while Tommy was distracted by some girls.

(Y/n) stood by the wall closest to the stage. She bit her lip nervously. She felt a bit it of place looking at the girls who there themselves at the band. Closing her eyes she wondered what she was doing here. She was a fish out of water and Nikki was sure to see that if he saw her. She was about to just cut out and leave when she felt a hand snag hers. She turned to see who it was.

"Where are you going sweet girl?" Nikki smiled at her. "Did you like the show?"

“It was amazing.” (Y/n) smiled at him. “You’re really good. I just,” She looked at a girl who walked by in booty shorts and a bikini top. The girl was checking Nikki out. “I just feel a little out of place.”

"Why?" Nikki checked hey out. "You look great. I love Aerosmith." He gave her a smile and a caress on her cheek.

“Thank you for inviting me out for it.” (Y/n) told him, leaning into his touch. “And your friends message that was on yours made me smile.”

"You want to meet the guys?" Nikki pulled her close.

“Sure.” (Y/n) said. She knew this would be the moment that Tommy would see her and tell Nikki to fuck off. But as Nikki led her backstage, she didn’t see her brother anywhere. She frowned slightly, a little confused. Where the hell was he?

“Tommy just left with three girls. Three!” Vince said excitedly to Nikki. “Cheerleaders man! Didn’t ask if they were college or pro, but does it really matter?” He laughed.

"Yeah, that's great," Nikki dismissed it. "This is (Y/n)."

“So, you’re the famous (Y/n).” Vince said,  taking her hand and kissing it. “I’m Vince.”

“Hey, doesn’t she kinda look familiar?” Mick asked. He shook his head and shrugged. “Anyway, I’m Mick. And you just missed the idiot Tommy.” (Y/n) laughed a little.

"Be thankful for that," Nikki muttered. "So I think we're going to grab some food. So I'll catch you guys back at the apartment?"

“Be safe. Use protection.” Vince winked. Him and Mick went to find some girls for the night. (Y/n) blushed and looked over at Nikki.

“They’re fun.” (Y/n) laughed as Nikki led her to his dressing room so he could get the makeup off.

“They’re something.” Nikki commented as he sat down at a table. “So you had work?” Nikki grabbed a moist towel and began cleaning his face. “Where do you work?”

“College library.” (Y/n) said. “We open for a few hours on Sunday for the kids that waited until the last minute to do things.” She laughed. “It’s fun, but it can be kinda boring too.”

“I might have to stop by and make it interesting,” Nikki gave her a wink.

“Uh, yeah sure.” She laughed, not sure what to say. “You sure you don’t want to go out with the guys tonight?”

Nikki shrugged, “you’re better company… I think I can revive my brain cells with you.”

“That’s good.” She offered him a smile. “So, where to Mr. Sixx?”

“Ladies choice?” Nikki dried his face and walked up to her. His nose touching hers before his lips met hers in a feathery kiss. (Y/n) melted against him. It had been all she had been thinking of all day.

“I could go for more of that,” She laughed, but Nikki’s stomach growled. “Why don’t we go get some Chinese food? And maybe someday I can cook for you, so we don’t have to keep spending money...” She rambled when she got nervous sometimes, and this was one of those times.

“I better watch myself then,” he whispered. “You might make me fat.”

“I’m sure you know plenty of exercises.” She whispered back. She couldn’t believe that had come out of her mouth.

“Oh,” Niki licked his lips. “Might have to work out together then.”

“I…” She wasn’t sure what to say. “Ready?”

“If you are,” Nikki grabbed his base and keys. “Kind of glad you didn't meet Tommy, if I can be honest.”

“Why?” (Y/n) asked. “Isn’t he just a goodball?” She knew exactly how he was, she honestly just wanted to see if Nikki knew how he was.

“He is but he can come on a bit strong when he tries to flirt,” Nikki said and chuckled. “I’m surprised he left with three girls. The must have been on something.”

“Yeah, I don’t think he’d flirt with me.” (Y/n) mumbled under her breath. “Sure you didn’t want to go with him?” Was she feeling jealous? She had only known Nikki two days. He wasn’t her boyfriend, and she had no right to feel jealous? But why was she?

“No, I had fun last night. I mean you are the only girl I’ve met at these things that can hold a decent conversation.” He helped her into the car before climbing into the driver's seat. Nikki drove them to a place he knew. He ate out more than he ate at home, and a lot of the owners around here knew him and gave him things on the house. It was just a little hole in the wall place, but Nikki had learned that usually, those were the best places to eat.

“I’ve been here a couple times with my sister.” (Y/n) told him. “They have the best spring rolls.”

“I know,” Nikki smiled. “I think I love their fried rice and noodles the best.”  

They ordered their food and the conversation came easily between them as they ate their meals. Nikki had just reached out to hold her hand when Vince came in with his arm wrapped around a girl. Nikki groaned. Of all the Chinese places in all of Hollywood, he walked into this one.

“Nikki! (Y/n)! This is Trixie.” Vince said, showing off his date. (Y/n) smiled at the look on Nikki’s face. She had to keep herself from laughing.

“Very nice,” Nikki gave a think lined smiled. “We just finished eating and were headed out so…” Nikki trailed off hoping that Vince would get the hint.

“Oh cool! We’ll join you!” Vince said. “Trixie is new to the area and I bet she’d love us to show her around!” (Y/n) bit her lip to keep from laughing, especially when she looked into Nikki’s eyes and saw how pissed he was.

“You know, I have a friend I could set him up with that might keep him busy sometime.” (Y/n) whispered to Nikki as they got up from their table.

“You promise?” Nikki whispered as Vince began talking about how he felt alive on stage, trying to make Trixie swoon for him. “So Trixie, where are you from?” Nikki cut Vince off. If vince was going to cockblock so was Nikki. Two could play that game.

“Nebraska.” She told him. “I came out here to be a actress!” Vince smiled and nodded.

“I bet you’ll be great.” (Y/n) said. She saw a clock on one of the banks and sighed. “I think I’m gonna call it a night though.” Nikki shot a glare at Vince.

“Awww, but the party just started! I’m here,” Vince said. “We could all just take a walk and see what shops are open and look around.” Vince tried to help Nikki out a bit.

“I’ve got an 8 am class. Trying to get them done so I can graduate.” She told them. Nikki didn’t want her to leave, but he also didn’t want Vince there when he tried to kiss her again. Why couldn’t he have gone off with Tommy and the three girls?

“I’ll drive you back to your dorm Y/N,” Nikki said as they stopped walking, ready to turn around and head back to Nikki’s car.

“You guys are no fun.” Vince teased. “You’re perfect for each other.” (Y/n) blushed. Nikki wrapped an arm around her. “I’ll see you later (Y/n)!”

“Bye Vince. Bye Trixie.” (Y/n) said as Nikki led her out of the restaurant. “You’re friends are nice.”

“Vince is nice,” Nikki shrugged. “But this was the first time I met Trixie.” And probably the last time he’d meet her, but he wasn’t going to say that to (Y/n).

“Sorry to be a killjoy,” (Y/n) said as they made their way to Nikki’s car. “I have a hard enough time getting up for class.” She got in, Nikki following.

“You are not a killjoy,” NIkki caressed her cheek before turning the ignition. “I know school is important to you. Besides, I want you to graduate so you can be our manager.” he gave her a sly grin and wiggled his eyebrows at her.

“Better cut me a good deal, because I’ll make you rich.” She smiled at him.

“Oh? And what is your going rate?” Nikki asked as he pulled up to the dorm building and parked the car.

“Well, right now, I think just another kiss.” She winked at him.

“You didn’t even have to ask,” Nikki whispered as he pulled her close and kissed her deep. (Y/n) closed her eyes and leaned into the kiss, feeling Nikki’s hands pulling her close and rubbing her sides. She had never been kissed like this before. She honestly didn’t want it to stop. Nikki sighed softly, his fingers reaching the hen of her shirt pulling them just enough for his hand to touch her skin.

“I, uh…” She said, moving back a little and breaking the kiss. “I should go.”

“Sorry, you have class tomorrow and...yeah… call me? Or I call you?” he whispered.

“Either is fine with me.” She leaned in and kissed him again, not wanting to leave but knowing she had to.

"I should take you on a real date," Nikki kissed her again. "Nothing fancy but… something nice?" Nikki want sure what to do, but he didn't want her to go yet.

(Y/n) blushed and smiled, “that sounds nice. We can talk about it once we figure out how to actually talk over the phone and not leave messages.” She laughed as she got out of the car. “Thanks for everything Nikki.”

“Anything for you sweet girl,” Nikki gave her a wink before closed the door and drove away.

She waved goodbye to him and headed towards the dorm. She smiled when she saw Vanessa in the lobby, who let her in since she didn’t have her guest card. She waited for Nikki to drive away before she sighed.

“I should’ve told him where I lived really.” She said. “I gotta walk home now. Can I borrow some more comfortable shoes or something?”

“Do you know what time it is?” Vanessa sighed. “Why are you here and not at your house?”

“I know, I know. I didn’t tell him where I lived and I didn’t tell him Tommy’s my brother. But we’ll get there. It’s not like he’s serious about me.” (Y/n) smiled. It was unlike her to go out on a Sunday night when she had an early class the next morning. Either Nikki was bringing her out of her shell, or he was corrupting her. Vanessa wasn’t sure which one it was yet.

“Ok, that is a recipe for disaster when they both find out,” she shook her head and sighed. “I can only help you with this for so long. We might have to come up with a plan… or just talk to your parents about letting you stay here with me in the dorms.”  

“It’s all about trying to get through college as cheap and fast as possible. Tommy might be a rockstar, but I don’t think he wants to help me pay off all the debt.” (Y/n) smiled softly. “This summer, I have some classes, then just one more semester and I’m done.”

“I’m still wondering if you were adopted or something.” One of Vanessa and (Y/n)’s friend mumbled. (Y/n) laughed.

“One could only be so lucky.” She laughed. “Well, I need to head home. I have to be up bright and early.”

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