#Why would i get the same thing twice
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Bro Im not getting XQ new skin it’s exactly his old one there is no point
#Everyone saying ‘ they copy pasted furina clothes’ my man#This is his old clothes exactly#Why would i get the same thing twice#Switch between them oh yeah oh woww so contrast#???#why did they do him like that?? AND THEY DIDNT LET HIM OUT FOR LR??#XQ was really an afterthought huh
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after watching 4 whole seasons in less than 2 weeks i think house md is maybe the perfect example of why we need to bring back 20+ episode seasons. like yeah sure there's a very clear formula but: there's time to add sub-arcs! motifs! weird experimental episodes! the season finales actually feel like season finales because there's enough episodes in the rest of the season for the characters to have chances to breathe without sacrificing the momentum or wasting time. it actually feels like there's a passage of time happening without the need for explicit mid-season time skips or exposition dumps because, guess what, the season is long enough that time actually IS passing. when characters change their hair or visibly start to age it feels normal because again: time is actually passing in-universe. i yearn for the days when television actually felt like its own distinct thing!!!!!!! i also yearn for lisa cuddy but that's not the point here.
#house md#amber quoting “you cant always get what you want” in wilson's heart inspired me to make this post#because yeah. Yeah. that is how you do motif#and quite frankly i do not think it would have the same punch if the seasons were significantly shorter#motif is something you need to be subtle about in tv. because otherwise it feels boring and heavyhanded and pandering#i didn't really enjoy the “people don't change” thing house had going on in s4 because that season is a lot shorter#and it was starting to feel repetitive#(although that's not the writers' fault bc i know this was a strike season)#the point is. to thread a motif in tv you have to be delicate#you need to sprinkle it in SPARINGLY and save it for when it counts#that's why the 'you can't always get what you want' motif has been going so fucking hard for me#we get it once or twice a season MAX and it fucks every single time#can't do that in an 8 episode season i fear!
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summer 1985, hawkins.
byler week 2023 | day iv: summer love
song used
#byler#bylerweek2023#Day 4 Summer Love#byler edit#byler gifs#mine#mine:gif#to get a more summer-esque vibe you should listen to the song!#creative process: i never have a creative process when it comes to gifsets. i tend to start my infamous laptop and run photoshop and see#what comes out of it. this time i really wanted to put some extra effort. when i make a gifset the first thing is finding out the vibes#i want to give to it. since it's summer love i wanted to have bright warm colors that recall summertime and i decided to use of course#footages from S3 - since it's the only season set in summertime - but of course it wouldn't be a gifset of mine if i didn't add a “gloomy”#vibe to it. that is why i spent an entire afternoon finding out a song that would give me summertime sadness kinda vibes and i found#“free with you” which is an incredible song with an incredible mv that i ofc linked in the post description. so#this gifset is all about summer love and it's meant to make you feel the love; the summer vibes; but at the same time i wanted it to be#a little angsty because 1st that's what S3 is about and 2nd - this is how i picture summer loves#i love to put this dualtity in my gifsets: vibrant colors and a really melancholic undertone that you can perceive just if you look twice
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i keep saying i need to make some zhaoryu shit but i'm back on my y5 kazusaeji bullshit again they are just so. m
#ada speaks#there NEEDS to be more zhaoryu shit. but kazusaeji still holds my ass hostage so#if i am to write a comprehensive timeline of kiryu's sexuality and him coming to realizations about himself that lead to the way he's#changed in gaiden to be more. uh.#then i have got to start at 5 because its literally when he first begins to realize he's fr into men. and then gaiden & 8 he's like Out#i need his first time to be with saejima when he's at his lowest it just makes sense#theres so fucking much in 5 that feels like its really coming to a head#mayumi. why did they fucking do that. like also nakajima and his coworkers being like U Are Gay but.#mayumi. and hinata. why are you having him refuse sex with women TWICE in one game#i hc him as acespec but i also think he should get to fool around w saejima for narrative reasons#and by that i mean i think it would be absolutely devastating and tragic and also they would both legitimately be so normal about it#saejima knows he's going back to jail anyway so there's that#but god help kiryu he's absolutely trying to fill the loneliness void with People all the damn time#lowkey doing what he did with kaoru to saejima 😭#you're grieving the loss of your family? time to latch onto the woman going through the same thing just a year later#lost your emotional support daughter? allow a woman to live with you while you continuously rebuff her advances#lonely and directionless and feeling guilty for having dragged your loved ones into conflict again and again?#have sex with probably the Only guy who can understand exactly what you're going through but is consistently in a Way healthier mindset#it also makes the conversation they have on the rooftop of new serena so much more deranged if it happened before that#im normal btw thanks for asking
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the thing about taking advice from anyone on tiktok or instagram including catholic and christian type influencers, parenting advice, relationship advice, etc, or internalizing any stories of horrible relationships and betrayal people tell on those platforms, or reading about all the ways interpersonal relationships can end horribly and be cycled through extremely quickly on those platforms is that you are necessarily then consuming the thoughts and experiences of someone who is willing to put their face and name on a public social media platform to talk at you. and like 1% of those people have a good reason for doing so and the other 99% are completely unhinged. so everything you’re consuming has first gone through the filter of "is this person weird and insane enough to make Instagram reels of themselves crying?" and if the answer is yes maybe their advice doesn’t apply to your life because you’re a normal person who would not do that.
#i don’t know if this makes sense but it’s something i was thinking about today#not that i really live my life according to Instagram reel advice but as a human being when i see something stated as fact i naturally seek#out the parts of it I believe or compare it to my current worldview#and when that person seems to have a lot of “clout” for discussing spiritual things….idk sometimes I’m like wait is this true? should i#believe this? and other times I’m like well is this a real pattern of behavior that can be observed in many people from different walks of#life including my own? this thing that all men do or all women do or the way all couples will eventually behave#this makes it sound like i am constantly on social media consuming hours of content which im really not#I’ll be on a train and scroll a little bit and something gets stuck in my craw#but with me I’m always like am i rationalizing this away because i don’t want it to resonate?#and I think in the case of anything on social media the answer can almost always be no#because im like wait. why would i take advice from someone who has a public Instagram account#im not saying a stopped clock isn’t right twice a day but really how much of my perspective and life experiences can they share in#when we have this totally totally mismatched worldview#(i mean this also applies to basically anyone offering any type of life advice who isn’t catholic about that)#(but when they are Catholics doing this that gives me slightly more pause for obvious reasons I’m like we are on the same team though?)#(and we are but only kind of and i do not have to listen to you because being an Instagram influencer is still cringe in 99% of cases.)
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“i don’t want the orange side to be patton’s brother,” i say. and then i make my interpretation of the orange side represent wrath AND justice
#sanders sides#why not? i mean first of all i will just straight up admit i am creativitwins fan number 1 and want them to be special and different. idc.#(aka the twins are going to have their own huge arc (source: the playlists) and like. do they really need to do that twice?)#second of all. i don’t really know how to articulate this well but. having 2/3 dark sides be just ‘evil dark side related to light side’#rubs me the wrong way??#like if they played the same trick twice it just feels like the dark sides aren’t their own. sides.#like they’d feel like theyre just foils to the main cast instead of their own sides y’know?#then there’s the whole thing that orange is seemingly going to be logan’s foil not patton’s#that part doesn’t concern me as much. it’s not like orange’s character would have to revolve around patton’s. it could be fine.#whatever does any of this make sense??#it WOULD kinda be funny to me if orange and patton had little to no beef with each other.#and the creativitwins see them getting along then look at their own fucked up relationship like ‘this was all for fucking nothing huh’#perry posts#despite all this. i haven’t seen a theory for the orange side that i like that isn’t SOMETHING along the lines of wrath#or like repressed emotions (….such as anger in this case)#so.#we’ll see what happens ig
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not to be a gatekeeper unironically but i genuinely feel a very, very small percentage of people actually understand crocodile. and if you think you're in that small percentage you're probably the exact kind of person I am talking about. Not to be mean but to be mean.
this is mainly directed at genderbenders and dofuwani shippers. neither of y'all understand crocodile and do not deserve access to him
#I could rant for forever about how much dofuwani shippers COMPLETELY misunderstand Crocodile as a character#Talking about (Omg twice divorced dofuwani) as if Crocodile would ever lack the self respect to marry or even datd doflamingo#In the first place#I have that damned tag filtered out but it still gets on my page#and before anyone comes at me with (Ugh can't you just have fun hes just a character) no im autistic and i rarely take shows as seriously#As I do One piece#And I take crocodile even MORE seriously#(omgggg dofuwani scene) and its a scene of crocodile telling Doflamingo they arent on the same level and that he'll kill him#That isn't Crocodile playing coy or hating him but loving him#When crocodile hates he HATES#Crocodile doesn't stand for disrespect! He doesn't stand for bitches like Doflamingo! I genuinely doubt you understand the first thing#About Crocodile if you ship Dofuwani#ok rant over#don't bring dofuwani on my posts#Crocodile genderbenders are a whole different can of worms ive already talked about#1pc#sir crocodile#DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE FACT DOFLAMINGO IS A CELESTIAL DRAGON#why in GODS fucking name would crocodile EVER want someone who was a celestial dragon and actively lusts for the power he had as one#And you know#I actually did ship dofuwani before I actually got to Crocodile and Doflamingos intros#Then I got to it and was like wow. this ship makes zero fucking sense#Also like Doflamingo is implied to be a rapist and a very canon human trafficker but. whatever!
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I am once again begging online shop payment processing companies to allow me to enter a separate name for shipping and separate name for billing!!
It's the same address, I'm just trans and have not legally changed my personal name, but I still prefer to receive mail as my preferred name! Like it's literally my professional name, I do business as my preferred name.
Annoying as fuck, and I don't want to chance my bank rejecting the payment (though I'm sure someone at my bank has put a note to allow it on my account by now, since I've contacted them a couple times before when I realized too late that the billing section didn't let me input another "address/name" section, and they said the payment was fine in those cases.)
Anyway, legal name changes should be free and non-advertised for everyone. Tbh, you should get a free name change every time you file your taxes on time as an incentive for good citizen behaviour. Once I am elected pres-
#i think the one i just used didnt even have a separate billing address option which makes no sense#guess they dont want anyone giving any gifts making the buyer pay twice for shipping like that#maybe it was a fault of the mobile browser but i highly doubt it since many desktop sites look like mobile browsers these days#just so fucking frustrating. what if i lived somewhere where my legal name would out me? (im in the closet rn so doesnt matter)#i dont want to fucking see my legal name. im already forced to see it everywhere else.#i dont wanna ruin my mood on a day when im supposed to be getting a package which should be a happy thing yknow#vent#transphobia#speaking of like i would change my name but i dont want to and cant afford the fucking ridiculous price for it#and i dont wanna advertise it in a newspaper either! shits expensive as fuck on top of the hundreds to file the court paperwork!#i already tried to do it once with money in hand and the receptionist told me that even tho it was for gender identity i could not...#...avoid the newspaper thing unless i also changed my legal gender marker. and i had to back out bc i have reproductive health problems#i dont want a gender marker change to fuck with my getting healthcare#(i did change the gender letter on my ID card later tho which only took a signature on a paper no hassle with anything)#it really really fucking sucks how all these little things add up all the time#especially when im closeted while living w family who wont even use my preferred name#the real kicker is that. both my dad and his dad used preferred names. my dad used his middle name#and i use part of my middle name. yet my dad even in death still gets the dignity of being called his preferred name and i dont#sexism at its finest#reasons why i dont even hint at being trans around my moms side bc i already got bullied by them for wanting to use my middle name#ive literally been asking them to call me my mid name since i was 12. and theyve been acting like im trying to be someone else#its the same middle name on my birth certificate they gave me. i dont understand why they wouldnt want me to use it#but yeah i stay closeted bc i dont wanna deal with the name drama amplified exponentially for gender#prob get kicked out too cuz theyre queerphobic as fuck and i cant work rn and dont have a car#id have to just go full feral and live in the woods with the lizards where i belong#Cori.exe#Post.exe#fuck lol just looked it up and u cant change ur first name if u get married. i cant avoid the fucking fee man. let me be cori#literally why is it cheaper to get married than change ur first name! bullshit! marriage has so much more legal implications#transphobic queerphobic aromanticphobic privacyphobic poorphobic shit ass fucking state ive literally been cori most of my life ffs cmon
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idk if that poll means viv betrays you or like. solas. he kinda betrays you by wanting to end the world ig
Yes! Yes sorry i tried to say that later in my tags haha, I just mean the whole betrayal thing reminds me of this very intense first impression of Viv, that's all. Whenever I think about the whole "mage betrayal" thing, I think of that just because I knew that my hurt feelings over Anders "betrayal" REALLY colored my choices in that (fairly early) character quest, ya know? And I feel bad haha, like it sucks and I wish she'd just given me more context T_T
#cuz like she doesn't betray you yeah haha she just isn't transparent and i was WORRIED she would#burn me once burn me twice thing ya know ya know#anon#asks#answers#And again I'll say it here so this isn't taken too out of context -#I don't really think anders betrayed you like that's a little dramatic#not you specifically anon haha just the da fandom in general imo#and again the metaphor I think of it as is like#if your friend shoplifts while you're with them but doesn't tell you until after#you'd be mad probably? but I'm not like Against Shoplifting in any meaninful way#i get why anders did what he did#would I make the same choice? I dunno prob not (in this fictional context with this fictional world and people omfg)#and i dont love he involved us without asking#but i dont feel betrayed haha#just hesitant to go shopping for sus shit the next time some nice mage asks me you know??#and again not even cuz like oh all mages shoplift HAHA wait this metaphor is running away with me haha sorry omfg#just like that seems to be a thing the WRITERS like to do haha#like it's a common plot device at this point so I'm JUST!!!#LITTLE SUS right off the bat is all haha#jeez i talk too much take my keyboard away lol
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...wait, penumbra phantasm is hidden in the background hopes and dreams???? and it's during the goddamn flowey portion?!
#more for my 'flowey/asriel is a homestuck' agenda /silly#im seeing people suggest it could mean final boss azzy in deltarune and like.#i can see why but im guessing itd be more just the angel motif in utdr. especially since the holy is fairly similar#and bc azzy is the angel in ut tpe#speaking as the no 1 flowey fan we dont need asriel to be final boss again. even if itd be really funny#like DON'T GET ME WRONG i have so many thoughts on a potential knight asriel/angel asriel#but i doubt Toby would do the exact same thing twice#he'd at least spice it up and make it a parallel rather than an exact copy and like. make it dess this time or smth
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i am still so weak dude even just using the trackpad on my laptop for a minute or maybe even less to scroll on tumblr was enough to make my arm tingly nd numb
#and it just spreads out through my body i am so oug......#i slept since 1pm yesterday to 6am today i think? and i still feel so tired my brain cant function#i just feel so heavy n like even breathing is taking every ounce of energy i have#i dont even know why it's hitting me so hard right now#usually i only pass out once or twice in a month n i recover pretty quickly but this has been rapid fire n constantly getting worse#i dont even think ill be able to go back to silks this week :(#and that fucking sucks not only because i really enjoy it but also it's the only thing that gets me out of the house#it's the only thing i have to use against my anxiety#i just feel like im stuck getting physically worse n because of that ill be forced to mentally regress from all the work ive put in#at the same im. doing a lot better mentally i think just because i hav my partner n being able to spend time w them just. changes everythin#everything is so much better & feels so much more possible#maybe ill be ok if i have that#it's not the full isolation downward spiral that would usually happen#i still have something 2 push myself for#i still have a bit of a continuous thing going im still not. failing? maybe . i dont know#from the second i go 2 sleep 2 the second i can talk to them again i cam looking forward to it i am buzzing#i just wish my body would allow me to have good things o(-<
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googles "will i be arrested if i play the exact same bg3 character for the third time in under 2 months"
#like again i know. i paid 70€ for this game i can play it however the fuck i want#but i still feel kind of. embarrassed?? esp bc im at my parents for christmas and new years and they know ive played this character twice#and like surely i should want to do something different after like 250 hours and yet... 😭😭😭😭😭#and ive realised that i never found the blood of lathander and my character def would want to get it even if it destroyed an ancient temple#and ive seen even more dialogue that i missed bc somehow i couldve long rested more frequently even tho i made a conscious effort to do tha#the second time around (bc i started playing multiplayer with my parents and already we got long rest stuff i never saw 💀)#also dialogue choices that fit him more but i was still too scared to pick bc i was afraid id get insta killed#or a companion would get so pissed off theyd leave..........#you could be like oh so you know what happens why would you play it but like why does anyone play sims or something#like sometimes you wanna see your little guys in scenarios 😭#(OH also i wanted to see if i could give astari0n worms in the beginning since he wanted them so bad#and it was literally one of the things he and my character bonded over as in they were the only bitches who thought they should use them#i just never thought to give any to him even tho he asked bc i always forget i can do stuff with the companions#AND im always afraid ill fuck something up for them gfkfjdhfkgkf)#anyway the point is wow still i have an unreasonable attatchment to this character of mine and i love him sm#and somehow i dont get bored of playing the same character after two full campaigns
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#ok guess what fuckers youre going to be on another tag ramble adventure with me#ive been afflicted with the same images in my brain tumbling around and the only way to free my brain is to write them out#and anyways i have been contemplating wol au uri for a bit due to various reasons (he came up and then i got this image and couldnt be free#shb with uri as the wol is. after killing vauthry. he is SO fucked up that raha STILL wont just let him die#he was supposed to have raha send him to the rift with the light and let him die there but now that he cant stop him rahas taking it himsel#and theres the whole. 'no we really cannot have the wol die.' thing.#that makes it infinitely worse to uri. him just yelling through blood to let him die! let him have his turn! he WANTS to die!#the idea of bring told that the wol CANT die makes it so much more unfair to him#'you wouldnt know what to do if i died? i didnt know what to do for years after louisoux died! i still dont know what to do without moenbry#da! papalymo can sacrifice himself and everyone adapts! shtola has thrown herself to the lifestream twice! minfilia died! i had to stay sil#ent and let ryne choose her own path if she died or not! i cant tell people that i would be lost yet everyone gets to tell ME that?#do you think i am better than them do you think them worth less why do they have the right to die and i do not!'#he is SO SO SO much worse as a wol and it falls out in one outburst after hes quizzed as to why he thought he could sacrifice himself#but he also realizes that its really fucked up to say that aloud so yknow. yknow what. yknow.#hell bottle up all his feelings and then one day hell either die or start crying and it looks like he aint allowed to die!#he still takes the aid from ardbert at amaurot with the statement that#'if i dont try and save who i might then ill never be able to face moenbryda'#anyways cannot stop thinking about me giving uri the echo like 'this will be funny!' and hes just 'my life has become infinitely worse'#HEAD IN MY HANDS
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call the hairdresser and call the mediator because the way i'm splitting to the fucking ends right now
#babes i'm so sorry about it i'm SO sorry about it but i don't think we can blame this one on the period craziness anymore#i've not even been that mentally ill lately but my friend said we like can't hang out before he goes back to school#AND my sister doesn't want to hang out tn and i'm genuinely like? i'm going to break my fucking phone#like okay i'll just kill myself. whatever. i'm becoming super fucking toxic it's really bad#obviously i don't say this shit this is internal i'm not gonna push for anything that's super fucked#but like. ohhhh my God the rage i'm feeling right now. i need to kill someone#literally why am i like this. no explanation no anything i'm just like this? who fucked me over though like what happened#what's my tragic backstory i've got nothing i'm literally just crazy#he's not even answering my fucking texts anymore like tell me to die. pussy. do it. do it! fuck w me right now#and i was so nice i literally was like. hey no worries how's your summer been what's been going on!#i'm watching more youtube within the last 10 minutes of checking my phone i've almost thrown up and thrown it twice#do you think people try to fuck me over. do you think that's a thing. like they're testing me#if you showed me some of my old online friends right now the way i would rip them into pieces#my girlfriend's been pissed lately too like it's my two best friends riding for me and nobody else#oh he replied fucking great. shooting myself in the head i'm so manic pixie for this i'm so fixing him right now#i'm not he's got a girlfriend. but like. whatever. could've been me & i think about that when i'm mad#i do not like him but me and her are literally the exact same she's just prettier and smarter and i'm more of a good person#not right now though. i need to loop someone gets hurt from mean girls until i'm fucking normal#neg#vent#suicide tw
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swear to god i'm just gonna stop watching the endings to shows i like. good shows need to get cancelled on cliffhangers forever
#sorry its just that this has happened like twice back to back for me here and im not really a tv show watcher so maybe other people are#better equipped to handle it and THIS ONE WAS STILL GOOD AND FUN except for the last scene. like the literal very last scene.#ridiculous in tone. like i genuinely don't know if they just ran out of time or what#they DEFINITELY ran out of money in the effects budget jesus christ. helloooo greenscreen. hello snapchat app facefilter#like the vfx are kind of hit or miss with this show but the practical effects always went HARD. and this very last scene#i cannot stress enough that this was the very last scene. they were SOOOO CLOSE <3#this last scene just looked so bad. AND IT WAS SO SILLLYYYYYYYY why sunglasses. why were the girls dressed straight out of MADELINEEEE#are there uniforms that actually look like that????#listen i thought it was going to be a BAIT AND SWTICH nightmare kind of thing.#because there was still so much time left in the video but it was just INTERVIEWS or whatever with the directors. DEVASTATING.#WHY DIDNT BEN COME WITH THEM. FUCK#sigh. pointedly not tagging the show name because i do love this show. is it perfect? nah im sure. but i DO love it#and i'm not interested in tearing it apart and reading other people do the same like i just did with The Other Show#like god i can't do that again. my heart can't take it.#david take those sunglasses off. please. for me.#I DIDN'T EVEN NEED CLOSURE ON THIS PLOT THREAD ITS FINE. THEY COULD HAVE ENDED ON THE SCENE BEFORE#i would have made do with that! or just a shot of some plane tickets on kristen's phone and some background noise#of the girls packing! something cute and sweet and implicationy like that we DID NOT NEED THE GREENSCREENNNNNNN#anyway even with what we do have I'm choosing to believe that ben was packing up his stuff and moving out there with them against his bette#judgement. like i know he said something about 'visiting' but he's rolling up his poster i can choose to believe what i want about that#i need to stop typing and thinking about it man i just realized he wasn't wearing his hat this whole episode. did his migraines go away#did i forget that from last episode. also while im complaining i WISH there was more lexis stuff this season she didn't get to be spooky#*capping my pen and throwing it across the room* but there was a lot of stuff i liked.#*gritting my teeth* im going to rewatch the season now.#or i'll just keep replaying the part where ben stumbles over the i love you. worth it just for that. because i am weak of spirit
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We've now hit the time of the day where Eclair starts lore dumping on me and I just have to take it until she's done. Is she crying? A little - don't worry about that. It's for character development.
#toast talks#Have I ever mentioned that Eclair’s mom was one of the victims in the serial disappearances case?#And that the reason Eclair strove to be a detective like her father had been and not a musician like her mother#was because even at her young age she felt that something was utterly wrong about the fact that her mother had just gone missing#and no one could find her?#Have I mentioned that her mother used to love to dance with her in the rain and after she died Eclair couldn't dance in the rain anymore?#What about the fact that Eclair sees the day she got her Vision as the day her mother congratulated her for coming so far?#Or how one of the reasons she doesn't mind standing out in the rain is because no one can tell that you've been crying?#On less serious notes - have I also mentioned that her love life was abyssmal because it's her job to find people's secrets#and no one wants to be with someone that they believe won't allow them to keep whatever secrets they may have?#Not that she *would* do that to someone without any reason to but there are enough people that conflate the role of Head Detective#and the person Eclair Dumont to the same scale. Much in the same way they do to the role of Iudex and the person Neuvillette.#In fact. She's been stood up on dates a few times which is why she's so reluctant to really reach out and try voicing her feelings.#The role of Head Detective is glamorized. Cases she's covered are printed in the Steambird or used as a basis for a new crime novel.#But she tends to decline interviews and refuses flowers and romantic gifts from admirers.#This is the same woman that panicked at the fact that Neuvillette would be coming to her home one evening and told the cashier#that she was just getting a few things for a little date. They asked for her birthday because she was buying wine and she misheard them#because her ass was distracted.#I'm just thinking about her at this point. Silly and smug but ruthless and precise. Observant and decisive.#A hopeless romantic that freezes for a moment whenever Neuvillette gives her a genuine compliment or praise.#The Head Detective that can take down a group of treasure hoarders. A young woman infatuated with a Iudex that won't look at her twice.#Or at least she doesn't believe he would. Shes wrong about that though. But I'll keep letting her believe that he doesnt think of her daily#Just a bit longer.#Uh. where was I going with this?#Don't remember. Have some disjointed Eclair lore that I'll have to clean up later -#oc tag: Eclair Dumont
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