one of the things that really bothers me about modern franchises, and in particular over the last 5 years or so, is their refusal to commit. what i mean here when i say this is that it's not uncommon for a major franchise to make a decision, whether about the plot or the characters, that should have had huge, world-changing consequences... and then just never address that again or worse, immediately go back and undo it. and i'm gonna pick on star wars and the mcu here because those are the two big franchises i'm into at the moment (and i think they're kind of the worst at this), but i don't want you to walk away from this thinking that this is solely a disney thing. i've seen this happen with game of thrones and supernatural and plenty of other non-disney franchises. spoilers ahead, you've been warned:
in ant-man & the wasp quantumania, scott and hope make the life-altering decision to stay behind in the quantum realm and defeat kang instead of going through the portal to return to their world. this should have been a huge meta decision for the mcu, and when i first saw it in theaters, my immediate thought was wow, what is this going to mean for the mcu going forward? are we going to get a movie/miniseries about scott and hope helping to rebuild the quantum realm? how are cassie, janet, and hank going to react to the losses of their loved ones (in some cases, for the second time)? is cassie going to become the "first" young avenger because she has to take her father's place among the team lineup (and i only say first because as of this moment, none of the other young avengers introduced to the franchise are official avengers yet)? except nope, because less than 2 minutes later, cassie had fixed the portal that had broken way back at the beginning of the movie and brought scott and hope back.
and it felt like such a cheat. i was so disappointed in that theater, not as someone who was invested in these characters on a personal level (because yay, cassie gets her dad back!), but as someone who has spent years investing themselves in the story of the mcu. what was the point of wasting screentime on scott and hope accepting their new lives in the quantum realm if it was just going to immediately be undone? the entire scene could have been cut to scott and hope making it back bare seconds before the portal closed and it would have had the same emotional impact. there was nothing added by making scott and hope (and us) think that there was no way back only to rip the rug out from under us and go "gotcha! you really thought we were gonna give this movie a sad ending? haha! you're so dumb!"
and this isn't the first time the mcu has done this. one of the biggest complaints about endgame was the decision to set it five years in the future with no consideration for how that would actually change the setting of the mcu. characters were brought back to the exact place they disappeared from with no consideration for how things might have changed in the interim five years (like planes that weren't in the air anymore, buildings no longer standing, even just something as simple as a chair being unoccupied). and then the mcu didn't even really have the courage to address how this would have shaped the world other than a few jokes and making the bad guys in the falcon and the winter soldier people who cared about how the world had screwed them over during the blip.
and things like this happen over and over and over again. the accords are put into place in civil war, but by the time we get to she-hulk, they're gone with no explanation because, as best as i can tell, the writers didn't want to have to deal with the worldbuilding that went into the accords. gamora is killed in infinity war, but heaven forbid quill not have an emotional investment in a film he appears for maybe 10 minutes in so now she's back in endgame. steve got to go live in the past with his ex-girlfriend (which is in itself a refusal to commit after the mcu both gave her a different husband and had the woman herself tell him to move on) but we need to establish that messing with timelines is bad because that's what the entire next phase hinges on so actually his ending was predestined and it's only everyone else who can't change time. whoever took this entire town and also wanda hostage and forced them to live out a sitcom fantasy is bad and needs to be stopped but wait, it's actually wanda and she can't be the bad guy yet, we need her for doctor strange 2, so actually everyone's going to defend her now and say that no one else could ever possibly understand her grief. thor has decided to accept responsibility as king of asgard, but we can't use him for any more movies if he's stuck in asgard, so actually he's decided to pass it on to someone whose entire leadership capability is developed offscreen. i could list more examples but this is making me angry, so let's move on to star wars instead.
with star wars, i look at first the oft-quoted meme, "somehow palpatine has returned." yeah, i shouldn't really need to go into detail on how that counts as a refusal to commit but. the last jedi was a study in how johnson refused to commit to anything that abrams had laid down in the force awakens, but rise of skywalker was almost like abrams had looked at the franchise and said "screw you for taking it away from me, i'm going to come up with the most bullshit stuff just to spite you for doing that in the first place. and i'm going to start by undoing the most important plot point of the first trilogy: the emperor dies." and yeah, disney's kind of tried to salvage this by dropping hints into the bad batch and the mandalorian about cloning, but that only really works if you're watching the franchise chronologically and not considering that both of those series came out after rise of skywalker.
and then there's the mandalorian, my sweet summer child, who is, in my opinion, the worst at backtracking their plot points. i'm not entirely convinced that any of the higher ups for this show really knew what they were doing when they started working on it and i'm not convinced that they know what they're doing now. yeah, there's the tie-in to the last season of clone wars, but the mandalorian has managed to walk back pretty much every single major plot point it's had. din is this legendary warrior who can't be beat, but no one will watch this show if he defeats everyone too early, so he's constantly getting beat up (tbf, sometimes some of the fights he loses makes sense like the krayt dragon and the mudhorn, but a lot of them don't. at all). moff gideon is dead, no wait no he's not, now he's imprisoned, no wait no he's not, now he's definitely dead, you can totally believe us this time guys. grogu can use the force and must be placed with the jedi, but wait, the only person still actively teaching the way of the jedi is luke and all of his students will be brutally murdered ten years from now, and we can't have that, everyone will be mad at us for killing off such a cute character and no one will buy baby yoda dolls (and also we have to set up luke's character degradation from hopeful, believes-in-love cinnamon roll to "i'm going to kill my nephew") so in between seasons let's have grogu decide to go back to din (and don't even get me started on how frustrating it is that a casual mandalorian watcher also had to watch book of boba fett to understand why grogu is back). din has the darksaber now which makes him king of mandalore, that's totally going to be important and what the entire series has been building up to, right? wrong! he might have spent the first two seasons making connections, learning about the world outside his sheltered upbringing, and demonstrating the various qualities that would make for a good leader, but the entire third season will be about din realizing that actually he's super unworthy and the darksaber should actually go to someone who... saw an animal in the water.
and it's really, really frustrating as a viewer! because how am i supposed to get invested in any of these plot decisions when they almost always get reversed? why should i care that mj and ned have forgotten peter when ant-man 3 has shown me that they'll remember him the next time they're all on screen together? why should i care that tech is dead when half of the last season of clone wars was about how echo was actually alive? if none of these decisions have any permanence, then where are the emotional stakes? why should i watch your movie if all you're going to tell me is that nothing matters?
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Fall is pleasantly chilly in October.
It slots between summer and winter to bring out the best of both seasons. The leaves change because they have to— because everyone has to— and the weather becomes a pleasant concoction that urges you to take walks and appreciate the whimsical scene. It’s also the season when seasonal depression hits you harder than the leaves hit the sidewalk.
This year, however, is different to you. The chill of the fall isn’t as biting as it usually is.
This year’s fall comes to you in the form of a dark haired lover with a spark in his eyes, in the form of whispered jokes in the dead of the night and romantic notes left next to warm breakfasts, in the form of a winning lottery ticket.
It comes to you in the form of your boyfriend of a few months— kuroo tetsurō.
You find that you complement each other well: he teaches you to be more spontaneous and you teach him to slow down, he teaches you how to cook his favorite meals and you teach him how to make your favorite drinks, you watch his favorite movies and he reads your favorite books.
Most nights, you can’t agree on how to spend time together. Your boyfriend is active in a way you could never see yourself be, and the idea of going out always rivals staying home— it’s like asking where to eat from. But in some rare instances, the stars and planets align and you find something to agree on.
That’s how you find yourself sitting on a park bench, mid-October, enjoying the chill of the weather and your ice cream cones. Your hand affectionately rests on his knee as he prattles on about people and how they feel towards vanilla ice cream.
“People don’t actually hate vanilla ice cream, everyone just says that because they’re affected by the public opinion.” He mumbles as he bites into his biscuit— coincidentally a vanilla cone.
You hum thoughtfully, hand sliding up to his thigh. “I don’t think I like vanilla ice cream.”
He turns to you with furrowed brows and a look of betrayal, “traitor.”
You laugh at his upset face and he grows more offended. The hand you had on his thigh is lifted to mess up his hair (more than it already is) as you relish in being the one to tease him for once.
“Sorry pumpkin, I must always tell the truth. I’m not a liar.”
He seems to inflate to full size at your comment, reminding you of the way he towers over you even when you’re sitting down. “Oh yeah? How come you always lie about the leftovers then?”
“Tetsu, those are my leftovers, in my house. I have the right to do whatever I want with them.”
“Not when you promise to save them for your loving amazing gorgeous boyfriend.”
“I have a loving amazing gorgeous boyfriend?”
He snorts at your reply and you cheer internally at your win. You look at each other with matching smiles and the atmosphere around you changes subtly. You block out the sound of the trees and the wind as your mind fills with thoughts of the man sitting next to you. Street lights cast a soft glow on his face, and you think he’s the most beautiful person you’ve ever seen.
He seems to be thinking the same as the smile you shared fades away and his face relaxes. A certain look flashes across his eyes and you feel a jolt of electricity course through you at the silent communication you’re having. You wonder what he’s thinking about and silently pray that it’s something good, that he’s not realizing that your right side isn’t your good side.
You tilt your head to the side as you continue observing him and he smiles lightly at your glassy eyes and pursed lips. The shadow cast over his face doesn’t dim down the light in his eyes; your hand itches to reach over and trace his eyebrows and wander across his face to drink him in fully.
“I think I love you.”
Your breath hitches and all the thoughts about touching him disperse at the simple words that he mutters quietly— breathlessly and delicately.
It’s not what you were expecting him to confess tonight, but you can’t say you’re surprised. You’ve been walking along the edge of love with him for a few weeks now, playfully teasing each other about the idea of forever, the idea of more serious promises. It’s no surprise that, out of the two of you, he let himself be taken by love first.
Now, you’re left standing on the edge, looking down at the depths of love and wondering if you’re ready to take the risk. Past mistakes pull you back and the fear you’ve held with you for a while warns you against it, whispering in your being that regret leaves a poisonous taste.
But the sight of kuroo in front of you, with rosy cheeks and hopeful eyes and lips you’re all too familiar with, gives you the push of courage you need to jump in, headfirst.
The smile on his face doesn’t falter while you’re readying yourself to say the words, as if he can read it on your face— as if he always knew it would play out like this. He waits for you to take the chance.
“I think I love you, too”
His face breaks out in a grin that’s so wide it makes your cheeks hurt and it takes you a second to realize that it's your own grin that’s hurting your cheeks. Inching closer to kill the space between you, he puts his arm around your shoulder. You turn your body to face him and you fit together effortlessly, like puzzle pieces.
You don’t think twice about kissing him, dropping the cone in your hand to place both hands on him. The sound of his cone hitting the ground makes you smile at the eagerness coming from both of you.
His eyes flutter shut as you angle your face to unite your lips and the taste of vanilla overtakes your senses. The softness of the moment, combined with your hunger for him, makes the fire in your stomach burn vigorously. The hand that wanders away from your collusion and caresses your knee makes you want to bounce on him and disregard public decency.
You’re one second away from clawing at his sweater when he pulls away breathlessly. Flushed cheeks and a crooked grin greet you when you open your eyes, and the butterflies in your stomach turn violent. You have no idea how he hasn’t lost control yet.
He brings your head closer to rest his forehead against yours, your smiles mirroring each other’s. His warm breath fans over your lips and you have to control the urge to go back to your ritual because he’s clearly enjoying the soft gesture.
You eventually pull back to change positions and rest your head on his shoulder; he welcomes the change in position with an arm back on your shoulder.
The park looks so different to you now, even if it hasn’t changed in the slightest. You’re looking at things through a different lens now that everything has changed. You know what it means for both of you to say those words; you know the plans you’re going to draw up together now, and you know that he wants this to work out as much as you do.
Your face grows warm as all the possibilities cloud your mind. The arm around your shoulder intensifies the tickling sensation across your skin. You look at him and he’s already looking at you. Words escape you at the sight of the warm unbridled love you see in his eyes, and you can’t believe you’ve gotten this lucky.
“I’m glad you’re here.” He whispers, leaning over to close the space again.
“Me too.” You breathe out before he seals your promise with a kiss.
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