#Yall clearly never talked with depressed people

[facelessfinest]

I think it's time we all admit that What if?...Doctor Strange Lost His Heart Instead Of His Hands? has been the only genuinely interesting and well done episode of the show so far.

High stakes, good pacing, phenomenal animation, and a story that actually deviates from the original in a meaningful way. It actually feels like such a small change lead to a vastly different reality.

I think what makes a What If? story interesting is the ties it has to the main timeline; if you want to showcase how a small choice can utterly change a whole universe, then you have to start in a universe that is comparably the same as what we already know, and show how one character choosing one different option can be catastrophic. Otherwise, you aren't really exploring branching timelines/butterfly effect, you're just looking at unrelated universes.

Even then, not every idea is interesting enough to warrant spending so much time on it. *ahem* captain carter *cough*.

Strange Supreme's appearances are just so fascinating because we get to see the new highs and lows a character can reach when their hearts are in a slightly different place. We get our unique factor in the form of him being genuinely in love with Christine instead of his job, and then our diverging path with him choosing to seek out dangerous knowledge, a choice which is highlighted by showcasing what would have happened if he hadn't done so! In the end, the universe is fundamentally changed, completely collapsed around him, despite starting off so normal. And that's not even the end of it!

He shows up in more episodes because of the power and knowledge he has attained, and as a lesson to the Watcher that choosing to sit out is only selfishness in the face of a danger that is ready and willing to take advantage of your compliance. It is genuinely fun to see the power he has in action; Ultron tried to blow up the universe in the finale, and Strange DEVOURED THE EXPLOSION. Like, that's fucking awesome!

And then there's Carter... Whose reason for being everwhere is just "I'm Captain Carter!" How dull...

Anyways, Strange supreme is goated and I will have no sass.

[youraveragenicaddict]

Xavier Thorpe x Male Reader Headcannons

A/N  - sup my dudes, chicks and everything in between. I have risen from the dead aka depression and i decided to give y’all something i haven’t seen YET - a Xavier Thorpe x male reader ( cuz i’m a simp for dudes who look healf dead and tired as hell lmao) so enjoy :)) (if yall want me to write sum u can try submitting it but like i can’t promise that i will write it cuz im lazy af, but u can try ur luck lmao

First of all, I would like to imagine you’d be an Addams

And alternative like the rest of your family

When you run into him after you finished unpacking and left to find your sister, he wouldn’t give you much thought

And the fact that after running into him and falling down you curse, A LOT

‘‘Aw fucking hell man, watch where you’re going!’‘

And speed walking away after getting up

After that, he’d definitely be intrigued

Xavier is a sucker for alternative people let’s be honest

You would catch him staring when you’re reading and listening to The Cure or System of a Down

But then again, he’s probably staring at someone behind you or something, no way he’d be into you, a dude, right? And no way you’d be into him, out of all people.

That all changes after you keep seeing him in the hallways, you both are whipped for each other.

One day, you were walking to class and there were no seats left, except for the one next to him

Just your luck! ( Don’t lie, you’d be happy)

‘‘Hey, uhh, is this seat taken?’‘

‘‘Hi’‘

‘‘Is it?’‘

‘‘Uh no yeah no it’s not’‘, he stumbles over his words while moving his bag away so you can sit.

‘‘Cool, thanks, man.’‘

After that, you start to greet him when you see him, which is quite often since you both go to Nevermore.

Sometimes, you even start a conversation about art and other things, like teasing him about being in a secret club, which you definitely didn’t hear from your sister Wednesday.

Those little hi’s and hello’s turn into something else at the Rave’N.

Xavier is left stunned and speechless after your entrance. You were wearing combat boots, a beautiful black suit, and a fancy black dress shirt.

At first, you didn’t get along with Bianca, but after a heartwarming conversation about things you hate, you find out you actually have a lot in common, and she definitely notices your and Xavier’s mutual pinning, so she basically pushes him out of his seat to go talk to you.

‘‘Wow, Y’N, uh you look amazing, just, wow’‘

He stutters out.

‘‘Thanks, you look great too, can’t say that white is my favorite color but it suits you. Wanna dance?’’

‘‘Yes, yeah, definitely.’’

After dancing the night away, you decide it’s too stuffed inside so you leave to get some air. The cold night air never felt better. That’s not the only thing you wanted, you pull out a pack of cigarettes and light one. Ah nicotine, my beloved.

Of course, Xavier finds you and joins you on the cold ground after a few minutes, when your cigarette is smoked only halfway.

‘‘Since when do you smoke?’‘ He questions you.

‘‘Since I don’t know, it just happened. Uncle Fester offered me a cigar once and it kind of went on from there.’‘ You say smiling at him, which is quite rare.

Both of you sit in comfortable silence for a while, watching the stars and enjoying each other’s company.

‘‘Hey, may I ask you something?’‘

Xavier asks, clearly nervous about something. Without thinking, you put one of your hands over his, thinking it would comfort him, but it only makes him freeze.

‘‘Oh shit, sorry, my bad.’‘ You utter, sad when he pulls his hand away.

‘‘Oh no, it’s not that I don’t like it, you know, it’s not that I don’t like you, no I like you, uhm’‘ Xavier rambles on trying to find the right words.

‘‘What I’m trying to say is that I like you, I don’t know if I only like guys or girls or both but I know that I definitely like you, like I like guys, more specifically you.’‘

That wasn’t anything you were planning on hearing from him. You’re frozen in place, mouth agape just staring at him.

‘‘If it makes you uncomfortable I’ll if you don’t want to talk to me again and..’‘

You cut him off mid-sentence, pulling him by his tie into a kiss. At first, he doesn’t kiss you back, but after a short while, you can feel him ease into it.

When you pull back you can hear him utter a small whoa, which makes you slightly laugh.

Xavier is definitely smiling at you, admiring how beautiful you are.

‘‘Oh fuck off Thorpe.’‘ You scoff at him, slightly elbowing him in the shoulder.

‘‘You like me, you, Y/N Addams, like me.’‘ He retorts, grinning at you.

‘‘Yes, I like you, you idiot. Now come here, I want another kiss.’‘

[t4transsexual]

yknow i dont love the "youre getting gender affirming surgeries? youre amputating HEALTHY BODY PARTS. what if someone just wanted to cut off their leg?" mostly because in my time working in hospitals, i actually did meet a man who did have an elective amputation of his leg while i worked in the hospital (im a healthcare worker when im not busy being trans online btw)

i cant give any information on him due to HIPAA and i think thatd be disrespectful anyway, but it was over a year ago i worked there. and sometimes in hospitals you have "regulars." which sucked; all my regulars were lovely people and i wish they werent in the hospital

regardless, there was a man there who was over 70, and one day i ask him what hes there for, and he tells me why. since hes gotten his knee replacement surgery some time ago, it keeps getting infected. he told me they keep trying to fix it but it keeps coming back. and he tells me he wants an amputation

he says hes reaching the end of his life, and if this is what it took to have a good quality of life so close to the end, hed do it. he didnt want to he in the hospital anymore. he said the nurses and doctors keep trying to talk him out of it, but this is what he wants

before anyone mentions, no, this is not a "crazy person" who is "getting an amputation because he wants to be disabled." he was probably autistic but clearly very mentally stable, he was depressed about being a frequent flier obviously. but this is an elective surgery. under no definition was this medically necessary. he didnt have a tumor, he didnt have cancer, he wasnt going to lose the leg unless he amputated it. he wanted it amputated largely because it would drastically improve the quality of his life

ive been thinking about him a lot since ive been going about the process of getting my gender affirming surgeries later this year. all things considered, he wouldve had more of a chance of having his ailment cured without amputation than i ever will having my gender dysphoria "cured" without surgery. if anything, i hope yall who make this argument understand that there are real people who may choose to get an amputation, and they dont HAVE to be "mentally unstable" to do it. neither of us are or were

and for anyone who cares, one day he greeted me from his bed with a big smile on his face saying he got an amputation, and i never saw him again at the hospital after that

[xelmokidx]

Nicknames

Mid90’s x gn or fem!reader / slight Fuckshit x gn!reader

Reader wanted a nickname, so the boys tried to come up with one. It sucked + readers' first time meeting the boys. 

Warnings!!: two mentions of fem pronouns sorta. Just fluff:D

**************************************************

Spike Psyche. That's my nickname. Out of all the things my friends could have nick-named me. Spike Psyche. 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” I say, appalled. Fuckshit nods, swigging back his Coke. 

“Yup.” he replies as Sunburn (aka stevie) giggles at the name.“Why?” I exclaim in disbelief. 

Ray chuckles at the nickname before muttering

 “Thats fucked up” Fuckshit opens his stupid mouth again. “Because all you talk about Is chopping off our heads and putting them on spikes, and how you want to kill yourself after every minor inconvenience.” I gasp, putting my hand over my chest dramatically. “I do not!”

Ruben shakes his head. “Yes, you do.”

FourthGrade chuckles behind his camera and I glare at him. He sinks down into the couch. “I do not talk about killing myself that much guys, if anything Ruben does more than me!” Ruben whips his head around to look at me. “Man, fuck you” He starts “I do not talk about that depressed shit.” I shake my head. “Y’all are trippin’” I look around the shop and see some customers listening in on our conversation. “I will not let yall call me that dumbass name, I like Y/N so much better”

Fourth grade finally chimes in. “But last week you said you hated your basic name and you wanted a nickname.” Bless his innocent soul. “Well I take it back, i am not answering to ‘Spike Psyche’” I sink into the couch with a pout. “Well fine ma, we’ll find you a “good nickname” Fuckshit reasons. I nod. We sit in silence as Ray gets up to help the customer. I look around the shop. 

New posters of artists I like are on the walls. Fuckshit insisted on making the space mine as well as theirs. All I heard was ‘we need new decorations and you have good taste in music’ I didn't really mind though. I've always wanted to add my own little spice into the skate shop ever since I first stepped foot in it. I think back a couple years. 

I was 13. I wanted a new board for my birthday. So, my dad took me to the nearest shop. Four boys sat on a couch near a wall, watching MTV on their small TV. The tall one noticed us first. He nudged the golden haired boy to his left, who then looked up at me. “Oh shit” he muttered under his breath. My dad frowned. I guess he caught that. “Hey, welcome to Motorz, how can I help y'all today?” he asked, clearly trying to impress my dad (on account of my dads business attire). 

My dad spoke for me while I hid behind him in fear. I was never good with new people. Especially ones I found cool. 

As my dad pressed questions like ‘How old even are you?’ and ‘fuckshits your name?’ I only found the kid cooler. How did you even wind up with a name like Fuckshit? 

Soon enough, my own personal skateboard was in my hands, and my dad was dragging me out of the shop despite my wanting to stay. As I looked behind me to the boys, and the supposed fuckshit was waving to me out the door. With my other free hand I waved back. He smiled a soft smile, and then walked back into the shop yelling “that chick was hot!” I smiled to myself the whole way home. I went back to the shop after school one day to see fuckshit again, and just stayed there for three years. My dad warmed up to fuckshit eventually, but still has some grudges against him. 

And I'm still in love with the stupid kid, even though he gets on my nerves almost every day.

 I look at fuckshit now. His hair is longer, yet less taken care of and frizzy. He has more scars from skateboarding. And his eyes look even more green against his tan olive skin. Suddenly, he speaks. “I got it!” I roll my eyes and mutter “what is it?” He smirks and walks over to me slightly slotting his legs between mine. “Your new nickname is Stalker, because you're always staring at me” The boys erupt in laughter. I gasp “fuck you” 

“You wish ma,” 

[cherryanony]

IN DEFENSE OF ELENA GILBERT: Why Do Yall Hate Emotional Women?

Vampire Diaries - Elena Gilbert pictured doing nothing wrong

HUMBLE BEGINNINGS

I started watching The Vampire Diaries back in 2016, right as it was coming to its long overdue close. To say I was obsessed was an understatement.

I would spend hours, days, WEEKS, consuming fan content, rewatching episodes and scenes over and over agin, discussing stupid plot points and writing descions that were made and throughout all of that one question has always dangled over my head...

Why does everybody hate Elena Gilbert?

Despite The Vampires Diaries being a dark supernatural teen drama filled to the brim with freaks & weirdos, murderers, psychopaths, evil forces and THE ACTUAL LITERAL DEVIL... Elena Gilbert reigns as the most hated character on the show by viewers.

But, why?

Elena Gilbert starts off the show as a 17 year old teenage girl who just experienced some of the craziest trauma any person, let alone TEENAGER, could ever go through. She was in the car with her parents when they died off Wickory Bridge and now suffers from a serious case of survivors guilt, a trait and mo motif she struggles with and must come to terms with throughout the show.

She falls for two vampire brothers who bring nothing but more hell into her life, she finds out she's adopted, her birth mother is a vampire and a piece of shit, her birth father is her insane negligent Uncle John, she's lost more loved ones than one can count over and over again, and she's constantly paranoid and never safe because she's a doppleganger with special blood that many dangerous supernatural creatures want.

"But she's whinyyy and a crybabyyy😩..."

As if one of her friends or family aren't on the brink of death every episode. Elena didn't do enough crying if we're being honest.

Elena is by no means a perfect, innocent character. A lot of people are right about her flaws; she can be very selfish with a what-about-me & and look-at-me-this-isn't-you complex and she's constantly getting away with a lot shit since she's the main character. And a lot people say she never faces any consequences but.... she does.... and it's called...

VAMPIRE!ELENA

THAT'S IT! That's where everyone says her character went completely wrong, her character completely falls apart. But I'd argue that Vampire!Elena is a culmination of all her descions coming back to bite her in the ass.

Throughout S1-3, Elena struggles with survivors guilt. She should've gone off the bridge with her parents. She's depressed, she's moody, she's "whiny" all while feeling like the supposed "love of her life" is trying to "fix her" when she's not ready.

In season 4 episode 10, Elena clearly states that Stefan looks at her like she's a broken toy that needs to be fixed. I could go on a whole rant on what I think Stefan's problems are but to sum it all up — Stefan turned into a vampire at 17 years old — a teenager — and spends his entire vampire life struggling with his heightened personality and his Ripper Gene which led him down a path to losing everyone he's ever loved.

(He killed his own abusive father, lost his best friend due to his own brother who he forced to turn with him and now wants him dead after a wedge is driven between them.)

I say all that to say I get Stefan's character. He's scared and insecure, similar to Elena, to be alone and lose everyone he cares about. However, all of his efforts to better himself and relationships only drives people away. People bring up Damon killing Elena's brother, Jeremy, all the time

(again.. HE WAS WEARING THE GILBERT RING! HE'S FINE! YOU DON'T ACTUALLY GIVE A FUCK ABOUT JEREMY, NOBODY DOES!)

But NOBODY talks about Stefan endangering Jeremy and almost getting him killed by forcing him to continue the Hunter's Mark because he thought Elena being human again would make her be in love with him again. (sorry but that's fucking insane😭😭😭!!)

Stefan wasn't only afraid of losing Elena, he was also afraid of losing her to his brother. All these efforts drove Elena away, right into the arms of the person he wanted to keep her away from.

I think Elena felt as if Stefan was just like everyone else who wanted "the old Elena" back. The person that Elena use to be before the accident that the show alludes to in the first season. But that Elena is dead and gone, she'll never be the same person she was before going off that bridge. Apart of her died that night and again when she went off the bridge for the second time and became a vampire.

Elena struggles with being a vampire and basically dying twice and instead of being supportive Stefan immediately wants to fix and change her. Damon is the only one she feels free and alive with. A statement Elena makes herself throughout the show. Despite the stupid discourse over the Sire Bond, Damon was the one she felt the safest with after that plotline was resolved.

But enough about comparing those brothers, this is about ELENA! You know who she gets compared to..?

KATHERINE

KATHERINE IS A LOSER!

Before you raise your pitchforks, I love Katherine. Great character, great villain, but she's a loser!

People LOVE to compare Katherine and Elena!

"Katherine's such a badass and Elena is a whiny crybaby." But I would argue the opposite.

See Katherine's backstory here, despite everything Katherine's been through, the show makes a point that while, yes, Katherine is a survivor, she's also an avoidant runner. She spends 500 years running from the big bad Klaus and once he fianlly lets her go she continues torture, manipulate, and harrass people.

She continues her streak of only whining and complaining about the life she never had because of the things that happened to her, which... fair!

However, despite being given several chances with a romance with Elijah, a life with her daughter as a mother, all the people she's ever wronged helping her and forgiving her on her death bed, taking over Elena's body and essentially starting over in a new life and even being THE QUEEN OF HELL... it was never enough. Nothing was ever enough for Katherine.

She was given many chances to change, to finally LIVE HER LIFE but she chose to continue down her path of destruction. Which, in my opinion, is fine for her character! LET KATHERINE BE THE SAD AND TRAGIC CHARACTER SHE IS! She doesn't have to be some anti-hero badass.

The contrast of Katherine and Elena, two girls who had their lives and innocence stolen from them at a young age thanks to tragic events out of their control and two vampire brothers, is great and executed as well as TVD writing could do (infamously known for shitty writing and plot holes but I digress).

The pieces to the K/E puzzle were so obviously placed, Katherine who was jealous of Elena living the life she never got, chose the path of selfishness and power, and Elena chose the path of love and regrowth and not letting her past define her.

But viewers missed the big picture. Katherine is a survivor but where did that get her? Dead and unloved. Besides freedom from Klaus, she didn't get a single thing she desired. Not a life with Stefan or Elijah or as a mother with her daughter or as Elena Gilbert or Queen of Hell! No! She lost everything and blamed Elena. SHE LOST! SHE'S A LOSER!

She survived, but she didn't live.

In my opinion, Elena is the real survivor. She didn't let her past consume and lead her to a similar fate as Katherine. She chose to be selfless and to love again after being hurt.

She chose to be alive.

SO BACK TO THE PROMPT....

Why do y'all hate emotional women?

"Elena has experienced more grief than anyone I've ever met." - Sherrif Liz Forbes

Every character has went through a lot and have done similar, if not worst, things as Elena as a result yet she's the most hated character?

There's a pattern of fans hating certain female characters who are more sensitive and cry instead of bury their feelings and just punch a man and suddenly get crowned "Most Badass Female Character". Characters, not just female, expressing their emotions is strong and badass and might inspire audiences to do the same and not keep grief in and become self destructive. It's healthy and natural and makes the character not so one note.

It's not fair to compare Elena's trauma and experiences to other characters (espically not Bonnie, that's topic for a whole other post). But why do other characters get a pass despite being ten times more flawed and problematic?

Why are certain characters able to cry, complain, self destruct, fuck someone over, etc but Elena can't?

Genunine question.. let's discuss...

-*- I wasn't able to fully delve into my thoughts on Elena and certain TVD characters, plot points, theme, etc because this post will be 50 pages long. This is the brief version.

***There will be a part 2 to this post where I delve deeper into the trend of hating characters like Elena.

[tunaababee]

gonna get really sappy and DEEPLY tmi/personal about twenty one pilots on main so im gonna put it under a cut. i am cringe but i am free and clancy tour coming up is giving me Feelings

i've been a top fan since 2016. i initially had some resistance to them bc it was when Stressed Out was at its peak and like, yall know how oversaturation goes. even if its good, its fucking annoying by proxy. all the 12/13 year olds at my high school were into it. i was turning 17. and it was a really fucking rough year.

i've been deep into homestuck since i was about 14/15, but by age 16 i had branched out into text-based rp and met a guy from italy who i kind of had a situationship with i guess?? at the time?? idk if that's what the kids call it. (whenever i describe how many relationships ive had, i count this one as a 0.5) anyways. it eventually got to a point where he was emotionally abusing me for a period of about four months. it was brief, but intense, especially since im a fucking lovesick lonely teen at this point who doesnt know any better. he lovebombs me, talks to me and acts like i am his girlfriend, gets jealous and shitty if i talk about other people, but then the moment he goes and does the same shit i get told i'm the reason he was depressed, im the reason for his problems, etc. until he calmed down and placated me and won me over again. over and over, regularly, for four months. it was a lot for my little developing brain to handle.

i know people have had it longer, have had it worse, but it really left a lasting impact. i was left with a litany of abandonment issues, and self-esteem and image that was already bad was buried dead in the fucking ground. i wanted to die every single fucking day for those four months. he even told me, as i began to question my sexuality properly, that i couldnt be bi 'because i liked him'.

but he LOVED twenty one pilots. would quote their shit regularly. wore the merch. all that stuff.

by 2016 i'd managed to see clearly enough and have enough support from friends that i felt comfortable cutting him and his circle off permanently. and it was fucking hard. i didn't have a lot of irl friends at the time and it felt like my only support network. after i finally left, i was desperate to feel some semblance of control, take something back, my own personal little 'fuck you' i could carry in my heart.

with all the hype around them, i gave top a try. slowly eased my way in. i knew i was hooked when i heard Holding On To You for the first time. it made me feel like i could take back that control and find a light at the end of the tunnel.

i consumed everything they had put out after that. i saw them live at emotional roadshow sydney 2017, i was turning 18. i made so many new friends. i felt such hope in my heart. i sobbed so fucking hard when they played HOTY. they weren't the only reason i made it through, itd be naive to contribute everything to them when i've done a lot of work and so have the people around me, but they were like a lifeline to hold on to when things were hard.

i went and saw them again in 2018 for the bandito tour. i made my own outfit and was surrounded by people who had done the same. i made more friends, had more adventures. i was dropping out of high school the year that Trench released due to having the worst mental health i'd had probably since my abuse and felt so lost but it helped me feel a little more stable and grounded. like that light was still there.

a lot has happened since. i'll be 25 when i go see them in November, once again at Qudos Bank Arena in sydney. i'm in a happy relationship with someone i love who respects me. i'm doing things that make me happy. i'm happy. i've felt and experienced and lived and loved and lost and done so so so much since i was a scared 16 year old hearing them for the first time. i've gotten piercings and tattoos, something i never thought i'd do, and put their work permanently on my body. i'm so proud every time i see my tattoo on my arm. i genuinely love and accept myself exactly as i am, which is something i NEVER thought i'd do.

having Clancy come out nine years to the day from blurryface, an album that has been so deeply important to me in a lot of ways, gets me real misty. this entire tour gets me so misty. i didn't think i'd live past 18 at BEST. but i'm here and i'm fucking happy.

genuinely cannot emphasise how much this album and this tour means to me. i plan on getting a Clancy tattoo once the album comes out and i've had some time to sit with it. it feels very full circle, i guess. hearing Next Semester has just had me thinking about this constantly and all weepy all the time haha. but a good weepy.

i cannot fucking wait to scream in a stadium full of people again in a way that heals my heart.

[straycalamities]

For Andrew > 🍕🩷🧠🥊

🍕 - What is their favorite food?

ill be honest. i forgot. i dont keep track of that very well for any ocs besides spook (bc its was based on one of my bestest fwiend's fav foods so i'll never forget it)

something savory, though. i know he really likes savory, hot meals over other things because it reminds him of his dad who he has a decent relationship with. and eventually his bestie ji-hoon likes to make him good meals to help him with his depression. so he has very good associations with a nice, full plate of food.

❤️ - What is one of your OC’s best memories?

in a bittersweet way, it's whenever his mom would rarely actually fully praise him for something because 99% of the time she's cold, strict, and stoic. he ends up holding the same for julian and the times julian was super nice to him, but they eventually get soured when he realizes that it was probably all just a honeytrap. all part of the manipulation tactics.

straight up good memories usually come from joyriding in a nice car or on a motorcycle. or when he met ji-hoon and they clicked rly well. or had a lavish date with a guy who didnt last, but it was a nice time regardless. when he first got a telescope. or when he first got one of his pets. a silly moment with alana. stuff like that.

🧠 - What do you like most about the OC?

i like...everything about him AAAA what do i even pick out...

i guess my favorite thing about him is how real he feels to me. like out of all my ocs i feel like he's the most that's like...that could be a real person. i've based a lot of him off my experiences or other people i've known so i think that's why. and so he's kinda like..a culmination of things i love and also the experiences and people that have been in my life. like a love-letter to my ?? living?? idk that sounds cheesy

i also think out of all my ocs he'd be the one i'd most like to be friends with if he were real. i could be friends with a bunch of them, but i think him and i would actually be close.

🥊 -What do they love to do? What do they hate to do?

like i said in the memories answer, he LOVES joyriding especially at night. nighttime joyriding is his default coping mechanism for like..anything and everything. he loves tinkering with things to figure out how it goes together and/or works. he loves listening to music. he loves watching golden hollywood era films or 80s cheesy flicks or cult classics. he loves just. watching his pet snake or tarantulas do their thing. he loves going out into the nightlife of the city. nighttime is his time and he loves being around people even if he's also a socially anxious and awkward mess. he loves meeting people and bonding with them over music or other things. he's a former partyboy so..he likes getting wild but in his later 20s he's a LOT more careful about it lol. and any of the previous stuff is 10x better if someone else is doing it with him or just parallel-playing with him if nothing else. he just REALLY likes being around and connecting with other humans.

he hates monotony though. he needs to switch it up and pretty often. he hates being around anyone that is just like straight up using him or toying with him. he can get down w like..yall are both just enjoying each others company for the moment and nothing else, but like..as a victim of major manipulation and abuse, he's got no time for any red flags like that anymore. he also hates doing things that are clearly a waste of time. like busywork or stuff like that he can't stand it. he also hates arguing lmao. he's pretty stubborn and hard-headed himself and he KNOWS it so he tries to just avoid arguments when he can because no ones gonna come out of it a winner. also he's not an emotional vault like ace is, he's pretty open with them for the most part, but he hates talking about the stuff that Truly bothers him like the mom issues or the julian stuff.

[straightfromthetorturedpoetsdept]

Yall need to accept that taylor swift chose to be closeted for a long time, because that is the message that we are getting from her music.

I'm seeing a lot of people miss the point of her music which is that she made a lot of questionable decisions to get to where she is in life, and the closeting is the worst thing she ever did to herself and to someone else.

Like, I don't understand how you are listening to midnight rain and dear reader and not seeing the utter fear taylor must have felt in 2016 at being called a fraud, a snake, a liar. Because well, she fucking was lying.

Like I dont mean to judge her of course, but she was sick and unhealthy and millions of people were tweeting about how they wanted her dead and making fun of her. The very thing from her childhood that pushed her into fame to begin with, happening on a national scale. "Do you know how many people have to be tweeting they hate you in order to make that trend #1" breaks my heart in the film everytime I watch it tbh.

She spent years of her life being scared to be queer in public, was probably being manipulated into being a good girl behind scenes by homophobic assholes who didn't want to deal with the "bad news" it would bring them. Like, she stopped herself from saying the dude in mean was gay when she was talking about it in 2010!!!! 2010!!!!!! Or 2011, depending on when that video was shot.

Either way, she was censoring herself all the way back in 2010/11 when it came to be openly supportive of the queer community. That's not what she wanted obviously because she was going to be honest, she wanted to say the truth but she stopped herself in time to say the right thing. The thing her record label wanted her to say instead. Breaks my fucking heart dude.

Like, the point of her music is not that she is still being forced in the closet but rather the pain and shame she is feeling at the role she played in forcing herself in this cage. Like, she has repeatedly shown us the complete self loathing she experiences when she thinks about people she's "ghosted" (aka killed, there is many different ways you can kill the one you love) because of her own decision making skills in that moment. Midnights is showing us all the ways in which she had to reconcile every part of her fame journey and all the good AND BAD decisions she made to get to the person she is now. To be the taylor swift she is today.

Like, she's not in a pr relationship because she learned her lesson with Calvin (did you listen to bejeweled and high infidelity?????? She spells it out for you pretty damn clearly). She would have never put herself through that ever again, because she knew she didn't want to ever be that depressed again. Like, how are you hearing all of folkmore and midnights and not understanding how much she wants to be free!?!?!?!?!??!?

Like, the contrast between 1989 and midnights is that taylor is pointing the finger at everyone else in 1989 (no judgement) and she is pointing the finger inward in midnights. Taylor has learned to take responsibility for her own decisions, for chasing after fame and all the ways that influenced her own decision making. Like, the reason midnights got a 10/10 from every critic is because the album really showcases Taylor taking responsibility in the most healthy and mature way we've seen from her.

Every single song is self-aware, she is self-aware in a way that she's never explored before because she's always been afraid of owning her mistakes for fear of feeding the trolls. We saw what happened with the anti-hero mv, we saw the trolls come out in full force and make a mountain out of a mole hill. I have a draft in which I'm analyzing the bejeweled mv and ngl... its kinds dark as fuck. I'm really excited to publish it because I feel like we're missing a huge portion of the conversation surrounding the video, blinded by the silliness of the song.

But yeah, like, idk, taylor being in a 7 year "pr" relationship where she is forced to hand over undeserved credit to a man (there is no reason why joe would even want a fucking grammy for an album he didn't write, like grammy gate is so fucking ignorant and braindead garbage I have to laugh at people who believe it) over her music, something that sent her into a year long depressive episode/burn out episode makes no fucking sense at all.

People just are dumb and believe what they want to believe about taylor. They always have and they always will.

[cinnamonest]

Diluc Ragnvindr - Yandere Profile

Yall are so kind and I am so undeserving hhhhh

If you stand idly by that flower girl in Mondstadt her idle line is something like "All I can think about is Diluc" And honestly same

This man exudes bde I'm sorry I just... It is a known FACT that Diluc is packing and I refuse to believe otherwise, lord have mercy I'm bout to SIMP

tws: yandere, mentions of violence

tws (below cut): noncon, kinda misogynistic in 1 part

------

What are they generally like? Lucid, aware? Obsessive? How do they behave?

Acutely aware, and in the beginning, frustrated with his own self. He's very much a loner type of guy, and he likes it that way -- in his mind, people are distractions.

He doesn't talk to you too much, but you'll slowly and subtly notice his presence with increasing frequency. He hovers. Silent, but intimidating. He's always there, in the background. Somehow, everywhere you go, you can spot him somewhere if you try, and even if you don't see him, you know someone is watching you, from the skin crawling feeling of eyes on you. It will never go away, and it's easily enough to drive you to paranoia.

In reality, he'd like to talk, really, but he doesn't know how. For the first time in his life, he actually has the urge to speak with someone, not for his own desire to speak so much as speak with you- to learn about you, to hear your voice. But the poor thing has no idea what to say. He's used to just going about his day and only speaking to others when they need something from him.

When he does talk to you, he finds himself even enjoying the silliest and most trivial of things you say. Normally he hates small talk, and he's normally annoyed by anything outside of very serious matters, but even if you're raving about something he has no interest in, he's happy to listen just because it's you.

He's fairly aware, too. Not a delusional for the most part, and he's honestly a bit afraid of rejection - he knows he's not the most pleasant or charming person to be around, and certainly not the best conversationalist. He tries to make up for it in thinking that his money, status, and protective ability can be something he can use to draw you in, so he makes sure to subtly and frequently remind you of those things.

How likely are they to kidnap their darling? How quickly will they do so?

Eventually, it's inevitable. It will happen, it's just a matter of time. His reasoning is less about your fragility and safety, even if he pretends it is, and more of a selfish thing. He doesn't want to be, and he'll certainly feel guilty for it, but he's a silently jealous person. Hearing you talk to others, seeing you smile at others, it drives him up the wall. Even during the day, he can't focus, thinking of what you're doing, who you're with, what you're doing with that person, and so on. He can't get anything accomplished, and people notice something is wrong with him. Really, it won't be a very long time at all.

He's not a very good manipulator, and he can't really think of a good reason to get you to walk into the winery backrooms on your own, so as barbaric as it may feel, he'll settle for the old fashioned way, just taking you, probably when you're walking all by yourself late at night. He is very intelligent, and will most likely formulate a way of making you seen responsible for some crime upon your disappearance, to discourage you from leaving, and to make it seem less mysterious when you disappear. People will assume that the darknight hero got to you. And, well, they’re not wrong.

How difficult is it to escape from them? How do they keep you restrained? How do they deal with attempted escape? 

Initially, he's watchful, staying at the winery so that you can't get far without him noticing. He'll cancel his plans elsewhere and make sure he's never more than sight distance away from the building. With time, he'll have to leave, and when he does, he'll probably invest in some very high quality locks to keep you in. Should that prove to not be enough, he'll have to use chains to keep you attached to the wall, instead. Needless to say, it's difficult.

If you manage an attempt, he'll be angry, sure, but he understands why. The first time, at least. Don't push it. If you manage to keep trying, his sympathy for you will slowly erode with each successive attempt, and soon he'll run out of mercy, and decide maybe just forgiving you isn't enough, and you actually need to learn a lesson to prevent this from happening again.

"Again? You really... Really don't give up, do you. This is the fourth time now... You've really pushed it, you know, I've tried to be nice. If you're not gonna get that, I'll make you understand."

How easy are they to trick, deceive, or manipulate?

Canonically speaking, he's fairly good at predicting the actions of others. He's clever like that. However, he's not the best at reading faces. As far as lies go, he will detect it maybe 80% of the time, but you can probably get away with a bit - once he catches you doing it once, though, he'll suspect you from there on out, and be much less likely to buy your lies.

When it comes to manipulation, he's one of the ones where it's like, he kinda knows, and lets it happen anyway, if it's for the sake of you being happy with him. That, and he's just flat out weak to your smiles and begging for little things. He's got his limits, though, so you'd be wise to only use this sparingly and not push it.

How lenient are they? What privileges can you have, and what will you be denied?

Protective to the maximum degree. Probably the worst of genshin boys.

Absolutely zero contact with the outside. No family, no friends, he might even go to the extent of faking your death to ensure there's not even anyone who will look for you.

Unlike Childe, Zhongli, or Albedo that I've mentioned as allowing you for walks or outside visits... That's not happening with Diluc. No, he's insanely protective, to the point that you very well might not see sunlight again, except through a window.

And he gets that it can get depressing, he really does, it's just the one thing he can't do. He'll try to substitute it, get you nice large windows to let the sun in that you can sit in front of - provided he's there - and maybe after a while build a little screened-in porch for the winery that you can walk around on - again, provided he's right there. You really can't expect him to let you out there when you're alone. What if someone saw you and tried to hurt you?

You get the feeling it's less about keeping anything else out, and more about keeping you in, though.

He's actually good about letting you do things for yourself, though. He won't restrain you from cooking or kitchen utensils or anything like that, unless you do something stupid like try to hurt him or yourself, in which case it'll be a revoked privilege.

What kind of rules do they have? What kind of punishment would they use?

Initially, he tries to go easy on rules, as part of his attempt to make you more accepting. He'll keep you more restrained for the first little while, and later on you'll be allowed to walk, but certain sections of the building will be off limits. He's fairly simple - be obedient, stay inside, don't try to fight. He'll invent new ones based on your behaviors as time goes on, but for the most part, he doesn't want to control you too much.

He fears getting too mad and making you scared of him, so, he struggles to punish you initially. He's probably willing to let quite a bit slide, but once he senses you're taking advantage of that, he'll put an end to it. Once again, he can thank the fact that he's naturally intimidating - he'll grab your jaw and force you to look at him, and honestly, just the look on his face is enough to send chills down your spine. If you're persistent, he's not able to leave you all alone and isolate you, no, he can't handle being away from you for that long. He'll appeal to the punishment of boredom, tying you to one spot and giving you nothing to entertain yourself with will get you to crack in a fairly short amount of time.

Humiliation works well, too. You're all alone except for him, you don't need clothes. So if you want them, you'll have to behave.

How do they deal with rivals, or perceived rivals? Will they get rid of them? Will they kill them themselves, or find another way?

This man only has to look at people to send them running. He's very grateful for his scowl once he realizes the power it holds. You'll be none the wiser as to why everyone you meet seems to end up avoiding you, why people get nervous when you approach, why you can walk into a public place and it will clear out within minutes of you walking through the door. It's ok, though, since you have him to go to for your problems. He'll shrug and tell you he doesn't know why it happens to you, but it's no big deal, you don't have to worry about it, because you don't need them anyway, right?

He's not above having chats with people either. If they're not driven off by the glares, he'll give them another chance by spelling out very clearly that they should back off.

With persistent offenders, though, he has to come up with other means. He's not a delusional, and he knows deep down that this is selfish, that they're not really doing anything wrong per se, but his anger is violent and ultimately overrides any guilt. He'll find a way to make them out to be criminals, spies, or some other form of bad person, and they'll meet their fate at the hands of Mondstadt's mysterious nighttime vigilante.

How easy is it to make them mad? What does their anger look like?

His default personality is... Irritated. He scowls a lot, he gets exasperated easy - even if he tries to be a bit more pleasant for you. His irritation is so common that seeing genuine anger is a bit rarer.

When he does, though, it's one of the worst. To really, really make him mad, you'd have to be exceptionally, intentionally bratty to the point of antagonism - he's understanding and lucid enough to understand why you fight him, why you try to run, but do it over and over relentlessly, or just be a childish brat and ignore his warnings, and he'll snap. His voice bellows when he's mad, it's deep and terrifying and echoes off the walls, his eyes narrow and he stomps heavily with every step. He'll grab you by the arm hard enough to bruise, and if you refuse to follow and dig your heels in, he'll just roughly swing you onto his shoulder and carry you.

He has to exert the anger in some way, though. He's not like some yanderes that can be talked down or calmed, or are going to go easy on you if you apologize and beg. Once the anger is there, it's there until he physically takes it out in some way.

So they see you as above them, beneath them, or equal to them?

It depends, really, because he's highly lucid, so he has very little delusions about you. Unlike many of the others, he's willing to acknowledge your mental competence, and if you're intelligent and have life experience he'll acknowledge it. He won't recognize physical capability, though, since you're nothing compared to his strength. If you are a capable, independent person, he won't delude himself into thinking otherwise. It will, however, have a negative effect, probably the opposite of what you hope for - he's going to feel a bit intimidated by it, really, because if you're capable and independent, you don't need him as much. He's more likely to find ways to force your dependency on him, if so, but deep down he knows you're an equal on a mental level, and it's frustrating.

Now, otherwise - if you're a little more on the ditzy, airheaded side - it will be below. He's realistic, again, and if you genuinely do fall into the category of being naive and a bit dumb, he'll recognize it. He feels more secure in your dependency, and he's more likely to baby you this way, and will absolutely be more protective.

How determined are they for you to love them? How hard will they try to make it happen? Or are they content just having you?

He really wants you to. He's not sure if he deserves it, though. He's acutely, painfully aware of how awful the things he's done are, and to top it all off, he knows that he should wish he was a better man that had self control, yet... He doesn't. He can't lie to himself and pretend to even have a shred of regret, even if he feels guilt. If he hadn't done all those things, you wouldn't be here with him like this, and even though he knows it's selfish, so very, very selfish, knowing that the horrible things he did got him the result he wanted makes it worth it. And given the opportunity to go back, he'd do it again.

He wants you to genuinely love him, and even though he struggles with human affection and communication, he'll try his best to be sweet to you, say nice things, try to be less irritable, try to talk more.

But if dependency, isolation-induced attachment love is the best he can get, well, that's still love.

Bonus: Is there anything that makes them unique, in comparison to other yanderes?

He likes to just... Spend time in your presence. He's still ultimately not much for talking, he runs out of things to say very quickly and even if you're not talking, he's very very happy to be around you. If you're being cold towards him even, he wants to just sit there and be beside you, if you get up and sit on the other side of the room, or walk to another room (provided you have the privilege to do so), he'll follow you wherever like a little lost puppy and just silently sit right back down next to you again. He soaks in your presence like sunlight, it makes him happy.

If you show him affection, especially after an abduction or when stockholm syndrome starts to set in, it's one of the few times you'll see him smile. His smile is soft and faint, and it's less his mouth so much as his eyes that seem to light up. If you show him affection, you can eventually reach a very vulnerable, very soft side of him. He keeps up walls for everyone else, and he kind of desperately wants someone he doesn't have to do that with, so he'll crumble to your affection fairly quickly, once he's assured of your love.

Also, he's one of the ones who fully understands why you're mad. He gets it, he's lucid, and he honestly knows how awful what he's doing is. He still hopes you'll get over it, though, and if confinement and isolation except for him is what it takes to achieve that... So be it. Rather than justifying his actions, he acknowledges what he's done, but he's aware that psychologically, he's already long past the point of no return, and he can't bring himself to stop.

“I know this wasn’t... what you wanted, and, I know it’s, I know this was really, really bad, but I only did it for your sake. If you just... try to get used to it... maybe you can be happy, if you try.”

General perverseness: how sexual of a person are they? What’s their drive like? How touchy do they get? Do they have any reservations about sexuality?

High, but embarrassed as all hell. He likes to maintain a very respectable and serious image, and people knowing that behind that neutral poker face is a brain running through nasty, nasty fantasies would not be very conductive to that image.

And that's what he does - working the bar gets very, very slow sometimes, and there's not much to do but sit around and let his mind wander. The more bored he gets, the more involved in these fantasies he becomes, and sometimes you might have to tap him on the shoulder to snap him out of it.

He feels guilty, really, for how he feels about you, and he knows that it's wrong and violating... But. But if you don't know, it won't hurt you, now will it? Nothing about the fact that he just thinks about bending you over the bar tables and fucking you raw is going to actually do anything bad. It's harmless.

He won't be touchy or perverse towards you by any means, and while that's nice, it causes something of a... Buildup. A lot of urges and needs have gone unmet, a lot of desperation to just feel you skin that has never been filled, and the thing about buildups is that when you reach a certain point they'll eventually burst, which is going to be what happens once you're in your new home.

How forceful are they? Do they care about your willingness?

He's moderate. He'd like you to want it, he's not highly sadistic and doesn't get off to your struggling/crying the way Childe or Kaeya would. But, in the end he's very set on what he wants, and if you're not open to it, he's not going to wait long. As aforementioned, he's got a lot of pent-up need that has gone unchecked, and while he normally strives for self control, at the point of kidnapping you, he's built up enough sexual frustration that he's not going to be very patient. Again, he's not going to be mean about it, he's more the type to just kiss your forehead and mutter a few reassuring things, even as you hiss at the pain of being impaled. That's another issue - he's convinced you might just be intimidated by the size, so he'll keep reassuring you that it's not going to last long, your body just needs time to adjust, even though you feel like you're being split in two.

He's content with knowing that, even if you mentally aren't wanting it, your bodily reactions show that you're clearly not repulsed or anything.

He's also another one to use that very thing against you, much like Albedo. He can feel you twitch and clamp down when you're close and he'll tell you that if you love him you'll cum, and if you don't love him, you won't. But no amount of trying to bring yourself down is enough to override the overwhelming stimulation.

He's also one to get rougher/more intense with time. At first, he's a bit afraid of hurting you, and he's not entirely familiar with how this all goes, and even can be a bit prudish and reserved. But the more he fucks you, the more and more he realizes he really likes having a sense of control and dominance over you, and just how nice it feels to come home when he's frustrated from a bad day and just fuck that energy out. Once he realizes you're not going to break or anything, you'll notice him gradually getting rougher and harder with time, until it becomes a norm.

What sort of kinks or fetishes do they have, or would they fill?

Stomach bulging/size kink

He's not normally an outwardly prideful person. His pride is more of a silent aloof type of pride, rather than a smug showoff type. He's not one to emphasize his positive traits just to look good. But, fuck, if there isn't something very, very pleasing about being able to physically see his dick making a bulge on your stomach every time he fucks into you. He'll make sure you don't close your eyes, grab your hair and pull your head down so you're forced to watch it fill you more than you can take, over and over.

He doesn't want to hurt you, really, but of all the things to whimper about, you just had to squeal that it's too big, that it hits your cervix, that it's splitting you apart, and as much as he really wants to be a good guy, you're really making it difficult. Hearing that just breaks something primal in him and makes him want to fuck you harder.

It's one of the few things he can actually get smug about, watching you clutch your gut and whimper from bruising and soreness even long after, and as time goes on he might lose enough shame about it all to make a smug comment. He knows he should feel bad. But again, you make it hard to.

Breeding

It's a possession thing, really. There's something so utterly satisfying about just watching cum drip out of you, listening to you whimper whenever you feel it filling you up. It's kind of cute, when he tells you he'll cum inside you and you panic, you squeal and wriggle and unintentionally clench down hard enough to make that happen, you practically just milk the cum out of him when you do.

Forced feminization?/housewife kink/I dont know what to call it but hear me out dammit

He has in his brain this idea of a perfect little housewife and you're going to fit that model whether you want to or not. When he breaks into goes back to your old apartment to bring clothes for your new home he'll only pick the most frilly, feminine of all the things you owned, and if you don't have too many, he'll buy ones for you.

He just likes the idea of having a nice, sweet little wife to come back to, especially after being so stressed with whatever bullshit he's had to put up with that day. Really, any darling in captivity is kinda sorta filling that role, but he's got a very specific image in his mind of you being very... Domestic. Submissive. Frilly little clothes and aprons and cleaning things and making food, it's very cute and gives him a weird sense of dominance that will inevitably turn to arousal - something about the whole ownership and submission aspect of seeing you walk around in those clothes, doing your little chores makes him really want to grab you and bend you over the nearest surface and just - well, you get the idea.

And he's not gonna listen to your whining, either, even if you're a naturally tomboyish person. You could have been the roughest adventurer there was out there, all ragged and getting covered in scrapes and climbing mountains and fighting monsters, but that's in the past, now. Now, is time for you to give that lifestyle up, in favor of a better one, one that will make you happier... if you just let it. 

How do they feel about pregnancy or babies? Do they want them?

He's yes and no, but mostly yes in theory. It fits into his little housewife fantasy and he feels it would be a good way to keep you attached to him. It would make you less likely to leave, it would give you something to do all day, you'd be happy. He's a bit worried about his own capabilities, though. He's not super empathetic and he's not very talkative. Ultimately, it would probably end up an accident that results from the aforementioned breeding kink.

What kind of (nsfw) punishments would they use?

Another one kind of like Razor, he's not gonna think it out too much, but holy fuck, if he's mad, just fucking feels like a punishment in and of itself. You'll realize just how much he's holding back on the regular when you see what it's like when he hold nothing back. It's bruising, it's brutal, and it's a little frightening to witness that kind of raw strength. He'd be one to pick you up into the air completely, holding your whole body up with his arms, forcing you to cling to him so as to not fall while he bounces you up and down on him. And really, once you account for the affect of gravity, so it's slamming into you at unprecedented force, and fuck, it's likely horribly painful, even if that pleasure is still there.

If he's exceptionally mad, he's another one willing to belt you, and while he'll certainly get off to it, it's something he'll only do when he genuinely has a reason to punish you.

What body parts of their darling do they like the most?

Thighs. He likes hooking them over his shoulders, grabbing the fleshy soft parts with his hands, running his hands up and down the sides. One day, one you're comfortable enough, he'd really like to just lay his head down on them like a pillow, they look so soft. And he loves looking at them too, loves things that show just enough of the curve of your hips to your legs and the soft skin underneath.

[gaylienn]

February and March stuff

Ok so like the last two months I've been in an internship provided by the state or whatever, because I've been down with depression and I need to get up again or whatever. Doesn't matter, other than I just finished it and I'm going to miss the place, but for once I'm looking forward to the future! A few months ago I got an ask here asking me if I had a recommended tag, which I answered that no I don't, but always feel free to ask me about stuff, but now I've decided I wanna try to do one of those little blog like posts where I go through the media I've watched the past month and say a few words about it. I've never been good with words and analysis and shit, so it's not gonna be extremely... profound or whatever, but I'll just word vomit a bit. If anyone is interested in my thoughts and opinions on media, this is the place \o/ (I'll try to stay away from spoilers, but beware)

I'm doing February and March this time because I didn't consume that much in March

^ That's Cola, the cat from my internship :)

TV shows

So I just wanna warn yall that I've mostly (read only) been watching Korean dramas the past two months, but at least all the ones I'm going to talk about are on Netflix (at least here where I live)

All Of Us Are Dead

I love apocalypse stories, with or without zombies. There's something so interesting about human perseverance in the face of death and destruction that I just love. This show is about a zombie apocalypse outbreak on a high school, the school is the ground zero, and we follow a bunch of different high schoolers (and a few adults) dealing with the danger. I've seen people frustrated with various characters' actions in this show, but I personally really enjoyed the characters. They're clearly teenagers, and it's really hard to tell how people would react to or handle an event like this, so I usually enjoy most interpretations. Anyways, I really like this show too because it's relatively short, just 12 episodes long, and it wraps up its ending pretty satisfyingly in my opinion. It also focuses a lot on how the government and military handles the disaster, choosing who is worth saving and who isn't, something that's eerily familiar after two years of COVID pandemic... I'll recommend checking this show out if you're into zombie apocalypse media that focuses on the survivors especially. Also South Korea is just incredible with their zombie designs and acting.. man

Sweet Home

Okay, so I've had this show on my list for a long long time, but I've always kinda pushed it to the side because I didn't care much for the monster designs. And I still don't tbh. The show is based on a webtoon, and it's very obvious that it works really great as a comic, I think the monsters look way more interesting as drawings, than as CGI monsters. But still, I think they did well with what they had! And I didn't expect to like this show as much as I did to be honest. It's another Monster Apocalypse show, instead of zombies, people turn into various different monsters, and no one really knows why. We follow a group of mismatched people who are all stuck in the same apartment complex together after all hell breaks loose. We follow mostly Cha Hyun Soo (Song Kang) who pretty early one shows signs of turning into one of these monsters, but seems extraordinarily to be able to control it to some extend. There's this theme throughout the show of wanting to live, no matter what. Also each character is just interesting in their own way, showing all kinds of different viewpoints of life. Like varying ages and such (there are small kids, old people and anything in between.)

TW for some heavy themes like self-harm, suicide, abuse, alcoholism, bullying etc, take care of yourself first!

Kingdom

It's another fucking zombie show.. Would you believe it? Ok, Kingdom has been on my list for so long, and after the two previous shows, I was still on a zombie kick, so I finally watched it, and holy shit. This is so good. It's your "regular" zombie outbreak story, but this time it takes place in Korea during the 1500s (i think.) Already that makes it sound way more interesting and fresh! I gotta admit, I do not know that much about Korean history, so I can't speak much of that, but just based on what you're watching, it's working so well. The main character is the Crown Prince of Joseon (Korea) Lee Chang (Ju Ji Hoon), who under turmoil from a recent war, political conspiracy and the rumors of his father, the King's death, stumble across a plague of sorts, that seems to be resurrecting the death. Turns out, yeah, they're zombies. He allies with Seo Bi (Bae Doona), an assistant physician and Yeong Shin (Kim Sung Kyu), a young tiger hunter with a past. Both people were survivors from the "first" outbreak. It's a show filled with political intrigue, family matters and zombies, all in the beautiful backdrop of medieval Korea. The show has two seasons so far, I hope it gets another. It also has a prequel movie, called Kingdom: Ashin of the North, that I highly recommend checking out too. It's perfect to pick up after season 2's ending.

Juvenile Justice

Ok, so this one is a bit from left side. I don't mind law stories, and this was one was honestly okay. I'm at all not informed on South Korean law, but this show is apparently about a special law around juvenile criminals. The cases in themselves were honestly super interesting, what drives a child or a teenager to crime, and how each case is unique. I'm extremely bad at wording this, but it's just that my main issue with this show was the main characters. The juvenile judge Shim Eun Seok (Kim Hye Soo) who is very stern and hates juvenile criminals, and the compassionate judge Cha Tae Joo (Kim Moo Yeol) both seem like fun opposites, but I feel like they were just a bit too tropey for my liking. Like from almost the first episode it feels pretty obvious what both their pasts are, and it's not executed in the best way. Anyways, that's how I feel about them at least, but I kept watching for the kids to be honest.

TW for child abuse, sexual abuse, self-harm etc.

Film

Death on the Nile

I watched one movie in February, and it was this one. I went with my best friend to the cinema, we watched Murder on the Orient Express together too, so we've made it a tradition by now. Up front I gotta be real with you all, I have never read any of Agatha Christie's books (yet) or watched any of the older adaptions of her works, so I'm pretty blind and naive to these stories. I enjoyed Murder on the Orient Express, and I think Death on the Nile was just as entertaining. In case you don't know anything about this just like me (the sole other person in the world) this is a murder whodunnit story, from the POV of Hercule Poirot, a private detective or something. You know the type. He's invited by a friend of his that he runs into in Egypt, to a wedding of just the most peculiar couple. It's the perfect setting for social intrigue, and a murder :D

I can't say if it's worth it for fan of Hercule Poirot who already knows the story, but for someone like me who's going in entirely blind, it was very entertaining to follow along and try and figure out what happened! Also I'm curious to see where Kenneth Branagh is going with this seemingly connected story over the Poirot movies he's making.

Video Games

Elden Ring

Ok, so full disclosure, I haven't finished it yet. I know I'm getting relatively close to the ending, but I like to savoir these kinds of open world games. I decided to put it here because I have still used 110 hours on this game in March, so it deserves to be here. I haven't played any of the souls games before, only Bloodborne and Sekiro, both which are among my all time favourite games. The Dark Souls series hasn't spoken as much to me, because I'm a little tired of the medieval fantasy setting, so I was a little iffy about Elden Ring before it came out. Would I be able to enjoy it even if I hadn't played any of the souls games, would I like the setting which also seems to be medieval eurocentric fantasy? But fucking hell, this game is awesome. It's FromSoftware's first open world venture, and they delivered! I think an upgrade from some of the earlier FromSoft games, is the fact that you can run away. Sure you can do that too in the other games, but it's easier here, it's open world, if you're in a place you feel is too oppressive you can just go away.. Go somewhere else, explore that. I'm rambling a bit, anyways, I'm not entirely sure what's going on in the story, in true FromSoft style. Sekiro had a relatively straightforward story that you could follow somewhat, but my knowledge of Bloodborne's story is almost entirely thanks to this youtube video. So I hope that I'll get more informed on Elden Ring's story too sometime in the future :D

Gameplay is fun. Tough, but fun. It's an RPG so you can go in all sorts of directions, and personally I've ended up with two katanas, just hacking and slashing, and it works! The enemy designs are wild, interesting and fun! 10/10

Music

Idk music, idk how to talk about music, but I love listening to it, so I'll just list some of the music I've been listening to a lot the last couple months, in case you're interested.

Eve - Kaizin

Anything by Eve tbh

Woodkid - S16

JAURIM - 스물다섯, 스물하나

Bonus

I just wanna mention this here for fun, but I went to a fun escape room with my friends on my birthday, and it's only really relevant for people in Denmark, and specifically around Copenhagen, but if you're in a need of a fun escape room I really wanna recommend Midgaard Event's Downfall Spy Mission escape room, it was so much fun, and so much worth the money. It was well put together, the setting, the rooms, the acting, just all of it. Just be aware that you will need to crawl on all four at some point, just in case you got bad knees or something lmao

[gameofdrarry]

Wizards Hearts Recs: Werewolf Creature!Fic

Wizards Hearts was a four-month-long Drarry reading fest. Players were given a playing deck of 52 tropes, and were asked to find 52 different fics to read and comment on to fill their decks. To prevent the same few fics from being read, fics were restricted to only being used for the game three times before being considered ineligible for further points. The tropes and submissions list can be found here.

Check out the masterlist of fics for this trope below the cut!

📜 Embers by shiftylinguini Rated:  Explicit Words:  41216 Tags: Post-Hogwarts, First Time, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha Draco Malfoy, Omega Harry Potter, Werewolves, Heat Companion Harry Potter, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Masturbation, Knotting, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Oral Sex, Scent Marking, Scent Kink, Come Marking, Dirty Talk, sexual negotiation, H/D Career Fair 2017 Summary:  Werewolf Alphas aren't meant to be alone, or to suppress their ruts indefinitely like Draco has been since he was bitten eight years ago. He needs company, companionship, to knot ― he needs an Omega Heat Companion. At least, that’s what the Healers say, and even Draco can admit contacting the person they’ve referred him to might be nice. Of course it turns out to be bloody Potter. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Heart Like Neon by lq_traintracks (lumosed_quill) Rated:  Explicit Words:  41103 Tags: Sex Work, Sex worker Harry Potter, Rentboys, rentboy Harry potter, Past Harry/Ginny - Freeform, past Draco/Theo, Harry/OMC - Freeform, Trans Male Character, Trans Female Character, Switching, Transphobia, Tattoos, hung harry, POV Alternating, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Hand Jobs, Rimming, Comeplay, Watersports, Duelling, Facials Summary:  Bored of being The Chosen One, Harry discovers he rather likes sex and becomes a professional. He’s good at it, and part of why is that he can read people. Not minds, not Legilimens, but their whole self, and he can give them what they don’t even know they want. Enter Draco fucking Malfoy, enigma to everyone, including himself. Harry can’t help but want to break into him, to figure him out. And Draco, thinking he’ll fuck Potter on a lark, has no idea what he’s in for. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Who we are in the shadows by Quicksilvermaid Rated:  Explicit Words:  99714 Tags: Dubious Consent, werewolf instincts, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, child trafficking, Brief Claustrophobia, Past Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Past minor character death, Past Child Death, Bigotry & Prejudice, prejudice against werewolves, internalized prejudice, Murder, Stabbing, Poison, Hallucinations, Creature Fic, Werewolf Harry, Werewolves, Auror Harry Potter, Case Fic, Masturbation, wanking, werewolf attack, Aural Voyeurism, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Biting, Marking, Claiming, Scenting, Possessive Behavior, Jealousy, Rough Sex, Edging, Secrets, Lies, Hurt/Comfort, Sharing a Bed, Loyalty, Loyalty Bond, Bonding, Angst, Domestic, Falling In Love, Enemies to Lovers, Self-Acceptance, Emotional Growth, Angst with a Happy Ending, References to Auror Brutality, H/D Erised 2019, Comeplay, Wall Sex, sex without lube, Identity Porn, Secret Identity Summary:  What happens when you’re forced to become the very thing you despise? Ex-Auror Harry Potter, tossed out of the Ministry for something he had no control over, has been looking for a way back to his former life. When he comes across Draco Malfoy in the criminal underbelly of Wizarding London and in need of protection, Harry figures bringing him in to face the Ministry's justice is his ticket back to everything he's lost. But nothing is exactly as it seems. Not even Harry himself. And as he gets drawn further and further into Malfoy's world of honour and deception he finds himself questioning everything he thought he knew—about his childhood nemesis, the Ministry job he misses so much, and most of all, about himself. What happens when you’re forced to see that you were wrong? ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 The Elusive Mate by 0idontknow0 Rated:  Explicit Words:  25786 Tags: Rating: NC17, Fanart, Creature Fic Summary:  Harry had done it (a) to save lives and (b) because the idea of him being Malfoy’s mate was clearly ridiculous, but now he had to tell Malfoy. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Finding A Place To Call Home by marysiak Rated:  Explicit Words:  54747 Tags: Alternate Universe, Creature Fic, Werewolves, Post-Hogwarts, Rough Sex, Top Draco Malfoy, Bottom Harry Summary:  Feeling directionless after the war, Harry is unexpectedly torn out of his own universe and thrust into another, where he must hide out with Remus Lupin, Teddy and Draco Malfoy as Severus Snape and Hermione try to find a way to send him home and save both his and his unwitting doppelganger's lives. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 as much a light as a flame by p1013 Rated:  Explicit Words:  6303 Tags: Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Alternate Universe - Medieval, Mating Rituals, Werewolf Draco Malfoy, POV Draco Malfoy, Knotting, Scent Kink, Mating Bond, Outdoor Sex, Anal Sex, Comeplay, Art, Claiming, H/D Sex Fair 2020 Summary:  His mother paints a wolf on his chest, its eyes bracketing his heart, and its muzzle pointed towards his groin. His aunt fills in the spaces around his waist and ribs with symbols he's lost the meaning of in the wash of whatever plant had been mixed in with the steam. They move after her brush leaves his skin, turning from incomprehensible marks to his name to wolf to home to hunt and then back to misunderstanding again. His legs are painted in patterned bands, starting from his ankles and ending at his upper thighs. His groin is left unmarked, the pale and empty skin meant to leave no doubt of the Claim once he makes it. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Burning the Ground by lq_traintracks (lumosed_quill), traintracks Rated:  Explicit Words:  10256 Tags: A/B/O-ish dynamic, Were-Creatures, Knotting, Rough Sex, Anal Sex, Bondage, Blow Jobs, sex on the floor, Rimming, Auror Harry Potter, Healer Draco Malfoy, Mildly Dubious Consent Summary:  "Strap him down," someone said, and Harry felt the rage thicken inside him -- the viscous fear. Magical bindings pulled taut around his wrists . . . He felt a wand touch his arm and then a sharp bite as something punctured the skin, and a sweet, cool tonic rushed his veins. His breathing slowed. His eyelids drooped. The ceiling went grey and dark. And then he heard a woman's voice sigh, "Someone, get Healer Malfoy." ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Omega's Binding by Madriddler Rated:  Explicit Words:  49405 Tags: Hogwarts Sixth Year, Alpha/Omega, Omega Harry, Werewolves, Knotting, Fluff and Angst, Anal Fingering, Size Kink, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Watersports, No Horcruxes Summary:  After a violent encounter, Harry Potter is turned into a werewolf. An Omega Werewolf, to be exact. Now dealing with heats and the ability to get pregnant, Harry must learn to live with his new forms and life, while a desire for revenge fuels him. Will he be able to resist his heat and vengeance? Or will he fall into an instinctual lust, and look for his Alpha? ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 The Light More Beautiful by firethesound Rated:  Explicit Words:  81255 Tags: Hogwarts Sixth Year, Dubious Consent, Potions Accident, Post-Hogwarts, Aurors, Returning Home, Owls, Drinking, Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Shower Sex, Masturbation in Shower, Knotting, Rimming, Falling In Love, Case Fic, Loss of Virginity, Acronyms, Motorcycles, Christmas, Quidditch, Pining Summary:  Thirteen years after Draco accepts Potter's help escaping the horror of his sixth year, he returns to England where he makes the unfortunate discovery that Potter is still as obnoxious as ever. And worse, more than a decade overseas hasn't been enough to dim Draco's obsession with him. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Run With Me by dragontara Rated:  Mature Words:  16738 Tags: Animagus, Creature Fic, Werewolf Draco, Animagus Harry, Bottom Draco, Bonding, Knotting, snarky Draco Summary:  Draco and Harry meet in the Forbidden Forest in their wolf forms falling fast and hard and eventually bonding with each other. Unfortunately bonding in their animal forms doesn't mean they are happily bonded straight away in a real life too. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Taro Milk Tea with a side of Depression by VeelaWings Rated:  Mature Words:  1073 Tags: Pre-Slash, Screenplay/Script Format, Conversations, Veela Draco Malfoy, Werewolf Harry Potter, Guidance Counselors, in therapy, Depression, Self-Hatred, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Morbid Humor, Inappropriate Behavior from a Professional, H/D Hurt!Fest 2020 Summary:  Draco sat through twenty grievous minutes of Ministry-mandated group therapy for Newly Registered Magical Beings & Creatures — then promptly stormed out. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Blood Moon Rising by noelleification Rated:  Mature Words:  38322 Tags: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Werewolf Draco Malfoy, Wolfstar is canon, Sirius Black Lives, Draco Malfoy Needs a Hug, Draco Malfoy is a Little Shit, Adoption, Slowburn Adoption, Drarry might happen at some point, idk - Freeform, Remus and Sirius adopt draco, Remus and Sirius as dads, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, So much angst, seriously get ready for angst, Abusive Lucius Malfoy, Lucius Malfoy Being an Asshole, Harry Potter but it's ridiculously gay, Gay Draco Malfoy, Gay Disaster Draco Malfoy, Trans Hermione Granger, Because we don't support TERFS in this household, Yearning, Sirius and Remus are in love but it doesn't mean they're smart enough to know it yet, so get ready for them to pine for awhile, uhhhhhh just have tissues ready I guess, I'm gonna try my hardest to make you cry, You're gonna suffer..., But you're gonna be... happy about it?, Enemies to Lovers, Friends to Lovers, traumatized Draco, Draco Malfoy Has Issues, Tonks is best girl, Tonks as lesbian wine aunt, Tonks has big sister vibes, Remus Lupin/Nymphadora Tonks Never Happened, Everyone is LGBT, because fuck jk rowling, Found Family, Whump, this shit hurted, Parental Remus Lupin, Parental Sirius Black, Torture, Aftermath of Torture, this shit gets dark yall, just be prepared Summary:  Draco Malfoy is cursed. Ever since Fenrir Greyback ripped him to shreds, Draco has transformed into a monster every month on the full moon. The change is painful, and living with Lucius Malfoy might be worse. But Draco is strong. He doesn’t need anyone, especially not Remus Lupin. Remus Lupin might be the only person in the world who understands what Draco is going through—but he has enough on his plate, between the still-raging wizarding war, the publicized nature of his status as a werewolf, and his best friend, Sirius Black, who Remus might think of in a more-than-friendly way. He certainly can’t take in a seventeen-year-old Death Eater—can he? ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 A Howling Good Time by FleetofShippyShips Rated:  Explicit Words:  5819 Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Post-Hogwarts, Established Relationship, Werewolf Draco Malfoy, Full Moon, werewolf/human sex, Transformed Werewolf/Human Sex, Knotting, Consent Given Prior, Multiple Orgasms, Overstimulation, Morning After, Aftercare (delayed?), Scent Kink, Fluff, (hahaha both literal and emotional), Don't copy to another site, Come Scent Kink (i.e. some post-sex bum sniffing) Summary:  They’d talked about this, and Draco had agreed that he would try it for Harry, once Harry had convinced him he was utterly serious and not fucking with him. The timing, however, was entirely up to Harry, and he'd decided tonight, this full moon, was the night. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Am I a werewolf? by a_reader_and_writer Rated:  General Words:  1230 Tags: Werewolves, Curses, Drarropoly 2.0 - A Drarry Game/Fest, Dramatic Draco Malfoy, Boyfriends, Fluff and Crack Summary:  Draco is hit by the werewolf curse. The healers send him home and tell Harry and him to watch the symptoms. Of course this isn't as easy as it sounds with our drama queen Draco. ❤️ Read on AO3

[albedos-experiment-gone-wrong]

Muichirou and Giyū  (may contant spoilers)

I have literally no idea why. But I love them both. And I think they’d love each other. NOT LIKE THAT. weirdos…./jk i set yall up for that kinda. But as a brotherly type of love. They’d get on each others last never, never agree on anything, fight and bicker all the time, but at the end of the day…..they’re still brothers. Most people don’t see how they get along so “well” because of they’re contradicting personalities but they’re just looking at surface personality.  also 

These two are most likely the most depressed hashiras in the current generation of hashiras. 

I say this bc….

Well Giyūs entire surface personality is depression basically. But if you dig deeper you’ll find that it’s cause by a couple of things:

Giyū isnt the type to call people that actually enjoy his company “friends” he thinks of everyone as “putting up with him” so he constantly feels alone

He feels like a burden to everyone which is why he distances himself

He feels as though everytime he makes a friend something happens to them (example: Sabito at Final Selection) 

His inferiority complex (this is canon.) 

Hes clearly a too highly medicated ADHD which can severely affect your personality, which has happened for Giyū and now hes managed to change his mindset to be alot more closed off.  Hes taught himself to never have an opinion of his own in the case of someone not liking it, which makes him miserable but he’d rather be miserable than make someone else.

Muichirou-

Being the youngest is hard, everyone babies you, protects you from “harm”, and basically looks down upon you so this caused his already pretty sharp tongue to grow even sharper

He also has no friends. Not that he couldn’t make any, he has all the materials needed, he just doesn’t know how to communicate his thoughts well. He’s most likely great at writing but speaking is a tremendous struggle and causes him alot of stress when he tries to not use sarcasm, teasing, and one syllable answers. So after a while of trying he gave up, he’s really grateful to anyone that stays with him no matter how he acts though, (etc. Mitsuri, Tanjirou, and probably Inosuke too)

He also has no opinion on anything, if you were to ask ““what’s your opinion Muichirou” he’ll defect it with a “i dont care” although he cares alot and has many options hes scared to share them, but not for the reason Giyū is, he could care less about certain peoples feelings getting hurt, he doesnt want the few people that actually seem to care feelings get hurt (see list above)

Hes always in a world of his own. After going through so much at a young age and having nobody around his age to talk to about it he’s started to cope with Malapative Daydreaming *this starts off as normal daydreaming and then slowly (or not depending on the person, in Muichirous case it was faster than most) becomes an issue. Hes created alternative worlds where nothing is wrong and hes happy and with friends. 

Anyways these are just my takes, Id love to here your opinions!!

[a-libra-writes]

How the Peaky Blinders Comfort You When You’re Feeling Down

sometimes we get those depressive moods that come and go....... so I guess that’s what inspired this? 2020 is a mess yall. 

In this imagine, you’ll be comforted by: Tommy Shelby, Arthur Shelby, John Shelby, Ada Shelby, Polly Grey, Michael Grey, Alfie Solomons, Lizzie Stark, Isaiah, Luca Changretta, Aberama Gold

Thomas Shelby

He could tell something had been bothering you, and you’d had these moods before, so he wanted to give you space. He wanted to, but it was hard for him to stay idle while your mood seemed to darken. He was no stranger to that, so eventually he called you into his office and pulled you into his lap. The gesture surprised you enough to smile, and that was everything to him. He gently but firmly asked you what was hanging over your head the past few days, and he wouldn’t take no for an answer. He’d understand if you just needed time, but he wouldn’t wait patiently, and he’d still buy things he knows you love in hopes of bringing your smile back a little sooner.

ARTHUR SHELBY

He knows something is off with you, but he doesn’t know what to do. He silently frets, paces a bit, feels useless and gets upset with himself, paces a bit more … and then Arthur finally just bundles you into a tight hug the next time he sees you. He rests his head on your shoulders and tries to “casually” ask if something has been bothering you lately. That’s when you realize how worried he’s been, and you can just feel the tension leaving his shoulders when you finally tell him. You’re always the one comforting him, so he keeps holding you tight and asks what you want of him - he’d give anything to see you sunny again.

JOHN SHELBY

He knows something’s off, but he’s clueless what to do about it until Polly spells it out for him and tells him what to do. John fumbled with “the plan” in his head, then said screw it and just decided to take you out to a nice place to distract you. While you two walked back in the evening, he’d take your hand suddenly and quietly ask if you wanted to talk about it. You couldn’t see him clearly in the darkness, but you could tell he was blushing a bit as he pulled you closer and threw his arm around your shoulder. John knew he wasn’t any good at talking about these things, but he understood dark moods, and he didn’t ever want you to think you were alone. 

ADA SHELBY

Ada would want to distract you with something fun first. The stress of the gang was getting to be too much, you needed to get out! She’d take you to a picture, then go for a drive, maybe even some shopping - whatever she knew you liked. It would be a long day and every smile and little laugh she got felt like a big victory. Once you were heading back, she’d slowly take your hand and ask what’s been biting at you the past few days. Ada wouldn’t accept you trying to brush her off, she’d want to hear whatever you had to say … and she’d give you space if you  needed it, even if she took no joy in it. 

POLLY GRAY

Pol already had an inkling of what had been upsetting you, and she was patient about it. One day you came home to the wonderful smell of your favorite tea, and Polly called you over to a cozy set-up she made at the table. She’d give you the look as she urged you to sit and please tell her what was going on. While you talked, she’d hold your hand and later pet your hair as she gave you advice. She’d reassure you that you’re a strong person who can fight past this, and she made a point to keep an eye on you and give you less work the next few days.

MICHAEL GRAY

He wondered if he was imagining things first, but the more he observed you, the more he was positive you weren’t acting yourself … and worse, you were pretending things were fine. Maybe a change of pace would be the fix, so he took you to your favorite bar, which was lively with drinks and dancing. You put on a smile for Michael, but he knew you weren’t actually interested, and it just made him antsy. Finally he took you out into the cold night and threw his coat over your shoulders as you both walked. After a bit of silence, he apologized for “being shit at this”, and said you didn’t have to pretend around him. He’d rather you be honest, and he wanted to help you as best he could. 

ALFIE SOLOMONS

Your husband quickly noticed how you’d been sullen and quiet, and it wasn’t the first time this happened, but it had been a while. He waited for you to talk to him first, but then he got impatient and just sighed as he pulled you into his lap. Well, he picked you up with his big arms and placed you there. He’d stroke your lower back and try to keep some levity as he’d ask how you were feeling, and what he could do to help. While you’d talk, he’d interject with a comment here or there, and when you were done he’d kiss your cheek and reassure you he’d look after you. 

LIZZIE STARK

For the past few days, she was picking up on things you were saying and doing, and she was a bit irritated that no one else had bothered to notice. You were a sweet and helpful girl, and it hurt to see you like. So one evening Lizzie sat herself next to you with a bottle of wine and asked you what was up. By the time she opened the second bottle, your head was in her lap and she was petting your hair while listening to you. She offered advice here and there, but she was mostly just relieved to bring you some comfort. 

ISAIAH

Isaiah was well tuned to your moods, and he never liked when you started to go blue - only because he worried he wasn’t doing enough to help. While he used to accept your excuses that you were just tired, now Isasiah tried to do more. After some weird advice from his dad and nothing useful from Michael, he surprised you at your house with your favorite flowers, some nice sweets and a dinner he tried his best at. He’d understand if you just wanted to lie down, but he’d at least ask you to eat a little and while doing so, he’d try to get you to open up to him. 

LUCA CHANGRETTA

The tall man hated the thought of his little principessa being upset, so he bought you something beautiful and expensive, hoping it would put a smile on your face. When you’d insist you didn’t need such things - you appreciated it, but you’d prefer time, Luca was a little lost, as he often was when your moods were blue. After some thinking, he’d take you to a cozy outdoor cafe so you could get some fresh air and something delicious to eat. Luca couldn’t keep his hand off your’s, and his gentle tone would surprise you. He’d ask you to tell him what to do - he’d do anything to see his sweet girl smiling again. 

ABERAMA GOLD

These moods weren’t new to him, he’d seen them in many people, but he always wanted to help his lovely girl. Aberama would be insistent that fresh country air is just what you  needed, as he often worried about your health in the city. He’d have a nice spot where you two could get away for a few days, and he’d try to amuse you with flowers and hunting and carrying you over mud puddles. It’s not until you were very relaxed and sleepy that he’d pointedly ask about your mood, and how he wanted to help you … But he also understood that you might need time. He’d just ask to share your space during that time. 

[xsarcasticwriterx]

Childhood friends-part 2

 Summary: Negan and y/n spend the day together talking of their history which makes things become complicated for y/n along with the toll of her friends demise.

Warnings: Swearing, mentions of verbal and physical abuse, signs of depression

Notes: jesus sorry this is kinda meh and sorry it took so long to get out I procrastinate a lot and life's been chaotic anyways I hope you enjoy it nonetheless.

Waking up in negans arms felt strange for y/n. She was laying curled up next to him their legs tangled together and y/n head on negans chest. She didn't want to move but at the same time she felt wrong not doing so.

After a few minutes of this internal battle going on in her head she eventually decided to move. Slowly moving away she slid off the bed and into the guest bathroom. throwing water on her face she recapped the events of the day before. Negan had broken her promise and made her feel a sense of fear she had pushed away for so long. She more so didn't understand how negan was so casual with arguments with the history they both had memories of.

Pulling herself out of the bathroom y/n was greeted with negan sitting up in the bed on his phone. “wont Lucille wonder why your in here?” y/n asked confused why he was so casual and calm. “You mean the same fucking Lucille who practically pushed you onto me? She stayed at her moms house last night after the fucking fight anyways.” negan replied with a semi annoyed tone. sighing, y/n walked over and sat next to negan on the bed. 

“negan.....we both know why i hate yelling.....how are you so calm around it.” y/n had to know. if someone even raised their voice at her shed feel her heart drop. “I know what he fucking did to me....to us and it took me a while but i eventually fucking realized if someone's yelling at me it's not the same way he did it. It's not to fucking make me feel like some small ass child but as a way of showing their upset.” negan said gulping. He never liked talking of his father. neither did y/n her memories with him made her feel like a piece of shit. she nodded slightly. “Hey wanna go get some breakfast?” negan asked her. “yea of course” y/n replied. 

Negan left to get changed leaving y/n alone. she changed into a simple tshirt and jeans. Putting on her tennis shoes. she fixed her hair and walked downstairs. she sat on the couch and waited for negan. The house was so silent. she hated when Lucille and negan fought it always felt so tense and awkward.

a few minuets later negan came down stairs. He smiled at y/n and grabbed his leather jacket. y/n followed after as they walked outside. Negan got into his car y/n following after. Negan put on Led zeppelin as they headed to the diner they usually ate at. So often in fact that the owners and them were on a first name basis. They had spent practically their whole life there. pulling up to the small place with big red glowing lights they got out the car.

y/n wasn't sure if it was the events of last night or the new of Lucille or a mix of both but something about being at the diner just made everything feel so surreal like reality wasn't actually real. they walking into the diner and suddenly y/n felt like she was 15 again. walking to their usual table the chefs immediately got to work. “shit feels weird as hell being here” negan said. “Very. i don’t get why not like we weren't here only last week.” y/n replied. “Things have all changed in a week made us feel....” negan drifted off. Something y/n had only seen happen at most 10 times. negan was never one to not have the words for something. Though she knew he had the words he just didn't want to say them. “Small” y/n finished for negan. He nodded. 

Negan wasn't one for being silent. Hell all through school teachers constantly harped on him for his obnoxiously loud and social behavior. When negan was silent y/n knew it was serious. Between the fight and Lucille's diagnosis everything has felt like a huge 180. Like the world would never be the same again. They had both known Lucille they're entire high school and adult lives they went through life together. They grew up together and now shed be gone. They wanted to hope of course everyone wants to hope that someone they love and care for won't pass but they knew the inevitable. Lucille's resulted weren't looking up and in the end they all knew what's going to happen. They sat in silence which was unusual to say the least.

“here you two. seem like you could use something a little more than your usual.” mark, their usual waiter,said. “Thanks” negan said. Mark nodded and walked off. Negan and y/n looked to see what he brought. seemed like their usual shakes. negan took a sip and his eyes widened. confused, y/n took a sip too. Feeling the taste of not only the strawberry shake but the taste of liquor filling her mouth she pulled away. “ah...you know Jim is going to ask what's up if its this bad” y/n said. negan sighed “i know....only other time they gave us this was the first time we came here after our fucking major fight” negan said.

That was probably the worst day of y/n’s life. Negans dad had banned him from seeing her but she didn't know that. they ended up having a huge fight when she got tired of being ignored. When negan yelled back about his father y/n felt her heart shatter. That same night they ended up here but didn't speak. Jim knew and told mark to give us something extra. Mark was their age and he didn't know that meant an extra desert or something so instead he added some liquor that was stored there. Jim came and placed two burgers and fries on the table and then pulled a chair to the edge of the table and sat down. “alright what is it. Yall fighting again?” he asked. “no it's not that” y/n said. “Lucille fucking has cancer” negan said and immediately sighed and placed his head into his hands. “shit...” Jim said. “i'm so sorry you two....” jim said. He poured more of the alcohol into their drinks. “think you need that.” jim said. “look I can't begin to imagine the pain you two are going through but i can say i have never met two people who care for someone so much and she cares for you two a lot too. She's lived a great life and now you two just need to spend as much time as you can with her”

They knew jim was right but there was a pain in seeing lucille. So many memories which only lead to pain because they could no longer create anymore memories. It felt like the end of a book. Jim stood up and walked off. they ate in silence only a few words spoken of small talk. once they were done negan started to place down a bill. “on the house” Jim said through the serving hatch. negan put the money back into his pocket. once back in the car negan placed his head on the steering wheel. “What the fuck do I do?” he asked mostly to the world. “Honestly....I have no clue....Think just do what jim said  y'know. take what time we have and use it as much as we can.” she replied. negan nodded. “I’m glad your here. I’ll never fucking know why you stayed after all the shit.” negan sighed. y/n reached for his hand” “because its shit we went through together. Just as we will deal with this together” she replied. she knew he didnt mean in general. He was speaking of the night that changed their relationship forever. The night she and him lost their virginity to each other. That wasn't something that needed to be talked about though not then.

Negan started up the car and drove to a secluded forest the place they went after negan had explained his situation at home getting worse. parking on the hill they got out. Sitting on the edge of the cliff looking down at the water. “I really am sorry. For everything. All the times I snapped at you, for bringing you to my house even after my dad was getting worse, for ignoring you and being too much of a fucking pussy to stand up to that asshole, and for messing with your feelings....for sleeping with you and then just leaving...” negan said. He was clearly drunk he never was sentimental and the smell of alcohol was prominent on his breath. He looked over at her and saw her face. “I mean it I may be tipsy but i know what i'm saying and its all true” he said. “thank you” she replied. She didn't know what to say.

She was never mad at negan for all that even when it happened only when he ignored her did she truly get pissed. Everything else is just a thing. She never blamed him. When his father beat her she never blamed negan. When negan ignored her she never blamed him she was mad but never blamed him. She always blamed his father. Even when they slept together she never blamed him because it was mutual. She never blamed negan so him apologizing was odd and left her confused.

They spent most the day at the cliff just thinking and being together. Negans phone rang pulling him away. “Hey” he said into his phone. “oh yea of course” he said “yep ok” he said and hung up. “um she wants to talk so...I guess i'll drop you off at your house” he said. They got back into the car and drove to her house. “I’ll see you monday” negan said. “Hey...it'll be ok negan. we’ll do this together” y/n said getting out the car. He smiled and nodded. For the first time today he smiled. She walked inside and flopped onto the couch. This was taking more of a toll on her than she originally anticipated.

[fatbottombucky]

Steve Rogers Ending...

Before you read this.. if you’re a stucky shipper, or ship Steve with ANYONE other than Peggy, you might wanna scroll on past friendo.

Also, you can disagree with me. I literally don’t care about anyone’s opinion, this is just how I’ve analysed everything of Steve’s arc.

Steve never got over Peggy. And that’s been shown THROUGHOUT these stupid movies. The deleted scene from Avengers1, where he’s in his apartment and has the file on Peg but doesn’t go see her. That’s him KNOWING she’s aged and not wanting to deal with it. Denial.

We then see him visit her in Winter Soldier. Clearly he’s visited her a few times because he isn’t shocked she has dementia. So, it’s safe to assume he visits her a lot. Wasn’t just a one time thing, probably, not every day but few times a month.

Also, he refuses any type of dating- again in WS. Natasha gives him options, he declines, at one point saying he wasn’t ready to date a lady with a lip piercing- which is a tad like Chandler when he finds small things wrong with women because he’s got commitment issues... (SEE WHERE IM GOING LADS?). He decides to maybe give one a go. His neighbour, but when finding out she’s with Shield, he backtracks and doesn’t even talk to her.

He also claims he’s “too busy” to ever date now.

He then spends TWO YEARS looking for Bucky with Sam. Two years. In that time he could’ve actually met people, formed relationships, but he doesn’t. He carries on being Captain America and looking for Bucky.

Peggy dies. Steve is heartbroken.

His kiss with Sharon wasn’t a “I love her” or “imma start dating this lady”, he just went to the funeral of the girl he was gonna take on a date in the 40’s, and found out she has a relative. A female relative. It’s kind of a rebound kiss (to me). Also Sharon kisses him. She pulled him to her. Not saying it isn’t his fault, but the kiss only happened because he found out she’s related to Peggy, and he was still mourning.

Everyone is always like “he never knew her”, “they had one kiss!” About Peggy. You forget that Steve grew up in a time where you only get one chance at love.

Also he did know her. He spent A LOT of time with her. And that kiss... was his first kiss. He liked her. Fancied her. Saw an end with her. Then he woke up 70yrs later, you guys forget that Steve Rogers expected to die. He didn’t think “oh imma be found in the future.”

Waking up meant that he had to find out she carried on, like she should’ve. Does that hurt any less for him? No. He loved her.

There’s no movie after First Avenger where he’s fucking happy. Where he’s content with this new world and life. He’s depressed. Angry. He finds out his best friend is still alive, but at what cost? Bucky being tortured for years and controlled, that’s not something that fills Steve with joy to begin with. It’s shit storm after shit storm, he doesn’t LIVE. He doesn’t experience life. He’s just a superhero.

So... yeah, he does go back in time. And yeah, it must suck because internet. But... fuck. He gets to rest. He gets to be with Peggy, he gets some of that life.

You don’t get to measure someone’s love for someone. People meet and get married after 2 months, I’ve seen it happen. Love isn’t to be measured. Yall just pressed. No matter how these endings happened, you’d find something to be pressed about. Just get over it. It ain’t that deep.

Fed up of seeing the “I hate Steve Rogers” discorse. Especially in the Steve Rogers x Reader tag. Get out of the tag. Stop tagging your hate with that. It’s fucking annoying.

[stopthebig3]

hey did you saw that Sakura kissed sasuke in the new novel? any thoughts on their dynamics here?

Sakura could peg him sideways in any “novel” doesn’t change the fact

1. they are confirmed non-canon and not comparable to the manga.

2. there’s nothing from Kishi that’s “proof” of SS.

So the answer is no, I don’t have any thoughts because I don’t read fanfiction and don’t care for it.

So yeah this ask feels laughably baity and trying to stir shit but yeah why not, let’s stir a bit and get this over with so people don’t have to send me similar asks anymore about what I think of canonballs SS; (I have gotten similar just thought it’s pointless to answer to them)

From Kishi we have Sasuke calling Sakura’s feelings delusion

We have Kishi calling her feelings 中毒  (中 = middle 毒 = poison, toxic, ill will, malice, bad influence, harm) that caused a reaction in neutrals in jpn fandom calling Sakura a crazy psycho who belongs in mental asylum. Here’s a bit image of what kind of stuff that word is often used for

So yeah I would be thrilled if my favorite female character was called a psycho and talked in forums as a person who, to quote “gathers male character’s jizz and baths in it because she’s so poisonously addicted”

We have from Kishi, him leaving her for 10 years and them never contacting, and two implications they never kissed

We have from him, Sasuke looking depressed while Sakura rocking her infamous fake smile (same as in war arc lol) while they declare Salad is what connects them (and it’s true, she really is the only thing they have in common)

Fucking this lol

Sakura destroying her own fucking house, making her and her kid homeless because her kid questioned her marriage

Oh yeah and this, which would be hilarious if this ship hadn’t destroyed so much

(confirmed)

So yeah we get it already, SS and NH won. But at what cost.

Partly thanks to this ship, Sasuke is reduced to an empty comic relief, everything good about his character thrown into trash. Meanwhile Sakura is just seen as a crazy psycho or pathetic delulu, or both, by normal people. So yeah, we should be ““““happy”““ for these characters because at least they got to marry someone. Wow. Applauds. And who could forget they have a lovely daughter with plot-induced angst that is resolved in 5 chapters when it’s not needed to shit on Sasuke/Sakura anymore. Who gives a crap about 15 years of bullshit when we have....... a game card where Sasuke smiles at Sakura. And a fanfic novel by someone who has nothing to do with the original series. Wow antis BTFO. Also it clearly bothers yall that people think your ship is shit, since constantly see angry SS sending aggressive and passive-aggressive anons to people like. Yall folks got your fanfic Sasuke filled with guilt. Yall won. No need to be pressed. Yall won, but yall also still out here “proving” your ship and convincing everyone it makes sense while antis keep shitting on you and your ship. Hell many of you even shit on NH/Hinata, despite it’s equally canon lol.

It’s funny this ship is what many casuals remember sucked about the show, even if they forgot all the political shits and unresolved plot lines. Like boy, even the biggest antis couldn’t have come up with something as fucked as GaYden was. We should really learn from the master. And some of yall had FEELS over Kishi’s vindictive trolling. So yeah excuse us if we dislike the ship and think it makes no sense. Even to Kishi it’s a joke. And I’m laughing. A lot.