#You on anonymous extra scared. please stay in a child’s place

[btsugarush]

why do you keep posting new story ideas and never actually write them, you've like tons of them and you haven't even started writing the 000

Why are you worried about what I do on my blog? It’s called wip (work in progress), and I’m allowed to post them. The “000” are teasers and I’m currently writing those as we speak, so you sound dumb talking about “you haven’t even started writing the 000”. Don’t even know what the fuck I’m doing but fixed your fingers to type this corny ass ask. I’ve already stated that ain’t shit getting started until Gangsta is finished. If you got a problem you’re very welcome to get the fuck on, bookie. You will not be missed or remembered. 🩷

[dobrikburrito]

dirty secrets pt. II, d.d.

words: 2.9k

requested by anonymous

have you considered doing a part 2 to dirty secrets? like ending with them getting nearly caught, I want more lol & continuation of dirty secrets where the squad finds out david and reader just fucked?

disclaimer: it is late but it is here. there’s fluff, there’s smut, there’s a little bit of angst. it’s fun for everyone. am I cooking pt. III bc this was too long? maybe. 

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“Okay, let’s do this.” Jack said, positioning himself a few feet from the pool. “Just do that again, come out of the water and then up the pool.”

I closed my eyes and held my breath, diving in the water from the pool of our Coachella house. My hair was completely wet… as was the crop hoodies and desert shorts from the new fanjoy collab Vlog Squad merch. Once I rise, the water drips from my hole body, as I hold myself onto the side of the pool to sit by the edge, looking straight at the camera.

“That was… perfect.” Jack said. “It looked amazing (Y/N).”

“That will look amazing on the montage.” Zane commented, loving the scene.

“Thank God we have Jeff and (Y/N) to sell the merch. Can you imagine if it were just me? We’d be doomed.” Jason joked and everybody laughed.

“Oh yeah, because this isn’t awkward for me at all.” I laughed, clearing my eyes from the water.

“What do you mean just Jeff and (Y/N)?” Todd asked, hands on waist, outraged. Jason shrugged.

I was laughing at their interaction, when I felt my skin burning. I looked around only to see David staring back at me, smiling and biting his lips. I looked away and smiled, trying my best to keep our little act together.

Since the party, we couldn’t keep our hands off of each other. There wasn’t a day where we didn’t secretly met and fucked. We decided to keep it a secret from all of our friends, which required some skills to achieve. After barely making out unnoticed from the party, with some lame-ass excuse that only worked because everybody was hammered, we were smarter and strategic about our sneaking around. We developed signals and little hints. Making sure our dirty little secret was only ours to keep.

Natalie gave me a towel to dry off, since I was freezing a little. “I desperately need to change clothes.” I told Natalie and in that moment David smoothly entered the house, headed to the one room were Jack was storing boxes of the new merch.

“Yeah, there’s dry ones in the merch room, everybody got the ones we stored in the living room already.” Natalie suggested, mindlessly.

“Oh okay. Yeah, that’s a good idea. I’ll be right back.” I told Natalie, smiling softly.

I walked calmly to the inside of the house, but as soon as I turned left to face the hallway, I ran for my life. Laughing as I found the right door, I opened it only to find David’s hand grabbing mine and pulling me inside, quickly closing the door behind me. Our bodies collapsed and his hands were on my face, pulling me to a kiss, where I couldn’t help but keep smiling.

“I’m literally making you all wet, baby.” I whispered to him, kissing him back.

“Oh no, that’s my job!” David laughed and I felt his tongue sliding into my mouth.

We found a wall free of boxes and packets, David masterly took off my hoodie and shorts in a split second. “You’re getting better at this, quicker.”

“I’m good with my hands,” He stated as he kissed my thighs from the knee up.

I nodded, “I’m one to tell.” I bit my lower lip, crossing my fingers in his brown messy hair.

We discussed previously that since literally all of our friends were in this house with us for the whole weekend, maybe we should keep apart and not call attention to ourselves. In the end, it was only three and a half days. We could do it, right?

Wrong.

We arrived four hours ago to the house. Posted some Instagram stories. Played some volleyball. Changed clothes to the new merch, filmed endless bits for David’s montage. Took pictures to advertise the merch later. All of the VS protocols, you might say. Needless to say, when I saw David wearing the desert shorts, I sneaked him into his room and got down on my knees.

We didn’t even last four hours. Three and a half days? Yeah, no.

“David, you need to stop looking at me that way. You know what it does to me.” I whispered and closed my eyes when he took off my panties and started licking me. “How am I supposed to keep my hands to myself that way? Oh. OH.” He hit some right spots and I pressed my hands on his hair, harder.

“I can taste what my look does to you, actually.” He teased. “It’s really good.”

“Son of a… Oh.” He resumed his business, knowing exactly how to make me tic.

David positioned one of my legs over his shoulder, giving him more liberty to, well, basically destroy any sanity I had left. The wet and warmth of his tongue hitting just the right places in my clit was giving me a quick build up, which raised even more when I felt his long fingers inside of me. My hand went straight to my mouth, biting the back of my index finger to keep myself from moaning. I circled my hips on his face and he hummed, always loving when I did that, specially when I sat on his face.

Took me a second to reach my orgasm and any strength I had left in my legs were quickly gone. Luckily, David was clever enough to hold me tight by the waist, leading me down to the ground, on top of him. I fell by his side, smiling happily, giggling when he made his way on top of me, kissing my face, lips and neck.

“You look amazing when I make you cum, did you know that?” David whispered to my ear, biting my neck softly. “Even more amazing than when you looked all wet with my merch.”

“You did like that, didn’t you?” I laughed to myself. David nodded, now kissing the valley of my boobs.

“I might not even put on the montage, because I’m jealous of it.” David smiled, knowing exactly how my reaction was gonna be.

“You wouldn’t dare! You know how hard it is to do that and not look like a gumball?” I looked at him, caressing his face.

“You’d never look like a gumball.” David chuckled, giving me a quick peck.

“Wait until the third day of Coachella, you might change your mind.” I joked back.

David changed his shirt to a dry one and left the room swiftly, firstly hearing if anyone was outside and then making a run for his room. I took my time to dry my hair and put on another pair of shorts and some t-shirt. When I made my way out to find everybody, they were still out playing and eating some food that Jason was preparing.

Then Coachella happened, all of us got drunk, danced, walked around from stage to stage, took a bunch of pictures together and had the time of our lives. For the whole first day, David and I spent mostly apart, which was a fun change of pace, because by night, even if we were exhausted from the festival, we’d be texting each other and sneaking out at 4 am to be together somewhere where no one would see us.

Honestly, a part of us were loving being together but the adrenaline of sneaking around and maybe getting caught was giving it an extra thrill. We didn’t want our friends lurking around and asking us a million questions about relationships since we didn’t wanna label anything or ruin this amazing thing we have.

On the second day, though, the girls and I spent the morning getting ready together, helping each other look our best. Not to suck my own dick, but I looked gorgeous, as well as my girls Nat, Cass and Kristen. Needless to say, it annoyed the hell out of me when despite our mutual arrangement of keeping a distance, David spent his day with Madison Beer, Kelsey and Stass.

And I couldn’t even bitch about it to my best friends.

“Oh, you’re in a mood. What’s up with you, girl?” Kristen noticed my grump.

“Nothing,” I said, like a spoiled child.

“Are you 5 years old?” Kristen laughed at me.

“Yes,” I frowned, then laughed with her. “I’m tired, my feet hurts, that’s all. I really want an iced coffee, but I’m trying to manifest it coming to me instead of me walking all the way over there.”

I was great at excuses with most people. Not David, though. He always read right through me. That happened when the little time we spent together inside the group bus after the festival, he asked me something and I barely answered.

I met him outside the house at 3:45 am. I lied down on the grass, looking up to the sky and seeing the stars, something that was hard to see in Los Angeles. David made his way to me and lied by my side, but instead of looking at the stars as I did, he kept looking at me.

I didn’t really say anything about his arrival, “Are you gonna tell me what’s been bothering you?” His fingertips ran through my arms, giving me chills. It’s hard being mad when my body doesn't even follow.

“I can’t.” I told him.

“Why not?” He kissed my shoulder.

“Because if I do, I’m just gonna look like I need to be put into an insane asylum.” I stated. David laughed at me, even though he seemed unsure if he could without making me more upset.

“If it makes you feel any better, I already think you need to be put into an insane asylum, so anything you say or do won’t change anything.” He told me, affective and cute.

I tried really hard not to smile. “I’m going to scare you away.”

“Are you a serial killer?” David asked me, pretending to be serious and furrowing his brows.

“No.” I raised one brow at him, confused at his question.

“Then you’re not scaring me away,” David was destroying any angry bone in my body. I was now back to being my normal pudding self.

“God dammit, you make it really hard to be angry.” I hid my face in my hands.

“Just tell me, please?” His hands caught mine and caressed it. I sighed and nodded.

“Maybe I’m a little bothered by the fact that your day was filled with Instagram Models and Pop singers.” I shrugged, rolling my eyes to myself.

David chuckled. “I was just staying away as we agreed.”

“Yeah, but… I thought that would be around Jason or Dom.” I whined and David laughed louder.

“So, the girls are the problem.” David nodded and messed his own hair. “Okay, I get it. If it were the other way around I’d be bothered too. But honestly, I was just trying to get some content for the montage. I’d rather just have been with you.”

“Did you get any good shots at least?” I touched his face and caressed his skin.

“Not sure, maybe one or two. I’ll probably just walk around with Jeff tomorrow and make him be dreamy and stupid and that will be the montage.” David chuckled, leaning his face on my hand.

I laughed. “Honestly, if you put Jeff doing the most random shit in the world, the viewers will still absolutely go nuts.”

“That’s true.” He smiled at me. “Are we okay? Do I get to kiss you now?”

“I was hoping you’d do worst things to me than that Dobrik,” I bit my lip and pulled him closer by the collar of his shirt.

It was all dark outside, everybody was sleeping. Having him all to myself was enough to get me wet. I was wearing just an oversized merch shirt and panties, which earned me an approval growl when David slid his hand under it to find my boobs. Pulling the shirt up, he put his mouth on one of them, sucking and biting and licking. His left hand spending some time on my other boob, but then sliding down, feeling my body, taking my ass in his hand and groping, pulling me closer.

I loved how at this moment, there was no rush. There was desire and fire, but we could take our time and feel everything. The chilly night weather and the fact that someone could walk in on us was a trigger, but at this point we didn’t really care. David’s mouth found my neck and then my lips, which he continued to kiss intensely, making me breathless of how much feeling was there in his lips and tongue. His hand found my panties, which he slid into and started rubbing my clit, teasing me. His hair was soft on my hand, but I wanted to tease him too, so I found his already hard dick pulsating inside his pants. I took his whole length in my hand and slowly stroke him, competing on who could be the bigger tease.

David one-upped me, thrusting into me with three fingers, which made me moan in the middle of our kiss and made him smirk. Bastard. I bit my lips, pulling him back to the kiss, wanting him more. His curled up fingers inside of me knew how to read the one spot that would corrupt me. As payback, I jacked him off faster, but he was winning by a mile. I bit his lower lip and he moaned, softly, he liked a little bit of pain.

My pleasure was rising fast and he knew, he could feel it in his fingers. “You’re so fucking hot and you’re all mine. Every piece of you is mine to do whatever I want with you and to make you cum as many times as I want.” His whispers in my ear were filled with breathless sighs and growls.

As I was about to reach, he stopped and as a reflex my hand held his arm and my nails carved into his skin. “David…” It was a warning and a beg.

“Shhh… Be a good girl (Y/N).” He bit my collar bone.

In a swift movement, he took me by the waist and pulled me on top of him. Arranging everything, he moved my panties to the side and let his cock out of his pants, positioning himself on my entrance. “I want you to ride me, (Y/N).”

I barely could say anything, as my body easily slid down on his cock and I felt him filling me whole. “Fuck.” I whined in pleasure.

David sat down on the grass to help me ride him, both of his hands on the back of my thighs to give me the support I needed to come up and down on him. First slowly, then gradually getting faster and faster, the positioning allowing him to reach even further inside me. I managed to pull him back to kiss me again, but that lasted a couple of seconds since my moans were taking the wheel here. His kisses went to my neck, sucking it, my head fell back, giving him room.

“Fuck, baby. You’re so good to me. No one rides me like you do,” He praised me and that just made me even hornier. He kept motivating me to go harder and faster, kissing every bit of skin he could. “Yeah, just like that, feel me all inside you.”

His praises were rusky in his deep tone, faded with deep sighs. He slapped my ass, which earned him a louder moan. He loved how responsive I was to everything he did and how, just like him, I loved a little pain. 

I kissed him again, harder and more desperate, as I was reaching my climax, that way helping him come undone as well. I rode him faster and faster and then slower and slower. Finding my own rhythm back down from that high. Once we were done, both breathless and sweating, I kissed him softly and fell beside him on the grass, chuckling.

Todd had the worst headache, which woke him up after a couple of hours of deadbeat sleep. He found some Advil in his bag, but his water bottle was empty, which made him whine and get up, sleepily walking towards the kitchen. He tried to fix his hair, which was all over the place, without much success, and his eyes were barely able to fully open. 

He found the kitchen, opened the fridge and got himself a cold bottle of water, then after a few sips he swallowed the pill. Walking outside of the kitchen, he faced the yard glass door. Everything was dark, but far on the grass bit of the yard there was something moving, something he couldn’t exactly tell what.

“Is that a coyote?” Todd asked himself, frowning.

Quietly, he opened the door and lurked in the shadows, trying to figure out what the hell was happening there. He took a couple more sips of water, until his eyes were used to the darkness and started to give form to whatever that was.

The movements were steady and repeating. Then it hit him. Someone was literally fucking in the house yard in the middle of the night. “Holy fucking shit.” Todd whispered.

“Is that...?” He squinted to try and find out who that was. The girl was on top, clearly, and then she fell onto the grass and Todd saw the guy fixing his messy hair. “David?” His eyes went wide. “Holy shit, but wait… Who the fuck is that?”

Then he put two and two together, realizing that there was only one single girl at the house with that length of hair. “Oh my fucking God.”

He couldn't wait to tell Jeff.  

[meganlpie]

Partnered Up

Anonymous asked: I’m so excited you’re writing Harry Potter now! Can I please get a Neville x fem!reader? Reader is Malfoy’s sister, but has had a crush on Neville for a long time, but they don’t really talk much until DA when she gets partnered with him to help. Maybe no one trusts her at first?

Here you are, lovely! I do not own Neville. He belongs to J.K.Rowling. 

Warnings: Maybe a little angst and some sweet fluff!

Pairings: Neville Longbottom x fem!Malfoy reader

You never asked for any of this. You didn’t ask to be part of your family. In fact, you hated that your father supported You-Know-Who. You wanted nothing to do with them. So, when you overheard Ginny Weasley and her brothers talking about a meeting at Hog’s Head Pub to convince Harry Potter to teach everyone to fight back, you snuck your way in.

         Students were glaring daggers at you. Well, except for Luna. She gave you a smile that you happily returned. “What are you doing here, Malfoy?” Ron snapped. It was obvious he didn’t like you. Not that you blamed him. Your brother was absolutely horrible to him and his family. “I want to help.” Several students started to argue, but they were silenced by Harry. He spoke up for you, but that didn’t seem to make anyone trust you.

         They trusted you so little that, when you began to meet in the Room of Requirement, no one wanted to be partnered up with you. When Harry told you all to grab a partner, they all quickly paired up, leaving just two of you. You and your very ill-advised crush. Neville Longbottom.

         The crush ill-advised not because of Neville as a person or even as a wizard. It was because of your brother. Neville was often the target of Draco’s bullying. It made Neville wary of you. Plus, with You-Know-Who being back, your father insisted there was no time for anything like romance. So, getting close to Neville was not an option…or was it? There was nothing saying you couldn’t at least be friends and you could keep your crush a secret for a while longer.

         "Uh, h-hi,“ Neville greeted softly as he turned to you. "Hi, Neville.” He looked so scared, but surprised that you knew his name. You sighed. “You can relax. I’m not my brother. I have no desire to torture you like he does. I really am just here to learn.” Neville’s shoulders visibly relaxed and he gave you a small smile.

         "O-Okay. I guess we should, uh, get started then.“ You nodded and took out your wand. Neville looked nervous as he raised his toward you. You smiled. "It’s okay. You can do it.” Neville licked his lips and you had to force yourself not to look at them. Why was he so darn cute? “Ready?” He gave a nod and you both cried, “Expelliarmus!” Neville’s wand flew from his hand, but yours stayed put. Neville looked dejected. “Don’t worry about it. Try again,” you encouraged.

*time skip*

         "Longbottom’s been acting strange,“ Draco commented one morning at breakfast. You shrugged, trying not to look over at the Gryffindor table. You’d been working with Neville in DA for a while now and your crush had only gotten stronger. "Don’t you have better things to worry about, Draco?” you asked nonchalantly. You weren’t in the mood. Draco gave you a grin. “No. Now that I’m part of Umbridge’s Inquisitorial Squad it’s my job to watch out for people like Potter and his friends.” You shot a look at him.

         "You joined the Inquisitorial Squad?“ Draco’s smile widened as he nodded. "You should too. Maybe we’ll catch Granger doing something against the rules.” You snorted. “Get real, Draco. Granger is this school’s golden child. She’d never break the rules.” You hoped you sounded convincing enough. You needed to get him off your back so you warn Neville and the others. Luck seemed to be on your side when Draco dropped the subject.

         As soon as classes were over for the day, you ran to the Room of Requirement. Once again, people glared at you. You rolled your eyes and scanned the room. Harry wasn’t there yet, but Neville was. “Neville!” He jumped and turned to you. “Hey, Y/N,” he greeted with a smile until he saw the look on your face. He gently took your elbow and lead you away from everyone else.

         "Is everything alright?“ You shook your head. "We’re in trouble. Draco’s joined the Inquisitorial Squad. He won’t rest until he catches you all doing something, anything against the rules. We have to be extra careful now.” Neville nodded. “Thank you.” You brows furrowed. “For warning me. You could have kept it to yourself.” You shook your head.

         "No I couldn’t. No one here really trusts me as it is. I don’t want to anyone to get caught if I could have stopped it.“ Neville’s face broke into a grin. "That’s really brave of you. Are you sure you’re not a Gryffindor?” You giggled, causing everyone to look your way. You cleared your throat and pulled out your wand.

         "Should we get started?“ You turned to put some space between you. Neville grabbed your arm again. You looked back at him in confusion. "For what it’s worth, I trust you.” You beamed at him as you felt your face heat up. “It’s worth a lot. Thanks, Neville.” He squeezed your arm gently before his own face turned red. “I, uh, guess we should tell the others.” You told him to do it. “They may not believe me.”

         After practice that evening, Neville hung behind. “Maybe you should talk to him, Y/N. You’re closer to him now than any of us,” Harry suggested as he packed up to leave. Neville was hanging around by the corkboard. You nodded even though you weren’t sure what good it would do.  

         You slowly approached Neville. “You alright, Neville?” He looked at you from the corner of his eye for a second before returning his gaze in front of him. You looked at the pictures tacked up there. “Are those your parents?” Neville nodded. You looked at them and smiled. They looked kind, just like Neville. “I don’t like to talk about what happened to them,’ he whispered. You reached down and grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze. "You don’t have to. I’ll be here if you ever want to talk.”

         Neville turned to you, not letting go of your hand. His hazel eyes met yours. “You were right. You’re not like your brother at all. You believed in me from the beginning. You kept encouraging me, even when I accidentally hurt you. And now you’re being kind enough not to pressure me about my parents.” You smiled and opened your mouth to say something, but he spoke again.

         "I like you, Y/N. Quite a lot, actually. As more than a friend.“ You blinked in surprise. You couldn’t believe it. You thought he might be putting you on, but the tips of his ears were bright red. That told you he was nervous and most likely telling the truth. "It’s alright if you don’t like me back. I didn’t expect you too, honestly,” he said and then started to ramble.

         "Neville, stop,“ you said, placing your free hand over his mouth. "I like you too. Have done for a while now.” Neville’s face turned even more red, if that was possible. “Really?” You laughed and assured him that you were serious. Neville swooped down and pressed his lips to yours excitedly, but pulled away before you could kiss back. “I’m sorry! Sorry!” he squeaked and you rolled your eyes. He was too cute. “Neville! There’s nothing to apologize for. I like it.” He laughed nervously. “Does that mean I can do it again?” You barely nodded before he kissed you again.

(a/n: I hope this is what you wanted!)

Tagging: @brewsthespirit-blog @aikibriarrose @esoltis280 (if you’d like to be added the HP taglist, please let me know!)

[ukulelecal]

Baby Talk

In which Calum hears you talking to your baby.

Warnings: none just fluff

Pairing: Calum Hood x Reader

Requested By: Anonymous

“Hiiii! Can I request a scenario with Calum and his pregnant wife. She is talking to the baby while tending to their garden and he finds it to be cute. Thanks“

A/N: i like burned out on the talking to the baby thing (its still there dw) so i added a little extra fluff at the end!

Requests are OPEN!

*Gif not mine*

Despite your pregnancy, you were still determined to stay active and not fall behind on your day to day activities. Of course, you didn’t want to push your limits and end up hurting yourself or the baby, but you weren’t going to sit around and do nothing all day. It just didn’t seem appealing to you, so you still tried to do most of the things you did every day.

Calum, being the protective husband he was, was always careful about making sure you didn’t exert yourself too much. He wanted to let you have the independence you wanted and not confine you to the couch, but he couldn’t help but worry sometimes. You and the baby were his everything, and he would hate to see anything bad happen to either of you.

You were now about six months pregnant, and some yard work needed to be done. The garden was growing nicely, as it was the perfect time in the summer, and it needed to be taken care of properly. Calum insisted he do it all himself; it was a hot day, and he didn’t want you getting overheated. But, you still decided that going out to at least water the plants in the garden couldn’t hurt. What was so difficult about waving a hose around? Calum eventually agreed, but made it clear that you had to go inside to cool down and take a break if you needed it.

You made your way outside after putting on some gardening gloves for safety purposes and grabbing a bowl to put any vegetables in that seemed ready to be picked, and turned the knob on the side of the house to turn on the hose. You then grabbed the tube of the hose and dragged it over to the garden.

With hose nozzle in hand, you started to spray the mix of flowers and vegetables in the garden, making sure to cover the entire area with just enough water. Calum was a little further down, trimming a hedge that was starting to overgrow. He glanced over at you every now and then, just to make sure you were doing okay.

After you finished watering, you raked your eyes over all the plants, searching for any vegetables that needed picking or any weeds that needed pulling. Finding a few, you carefully lowered yourself to your knees to get to work, although it was agreed upon that you would be watering the plants only.

Calum glanced over at you, eyebrows furrowing when he saw you on your knees. Seeing you were okay, he bit his lip and forced himself to just let you be. He knew you would stop if it was too much. With that, he continued on trimming the hedge.

You fell back onto your heels after a few minutes, stopping to catch your breath for a second.

“You’re making this real difficult, you know that?” You mumbled, glancing down at your protruding stomach. You gently rubbed your hand over the large bump, basically forgetting that your husband was just feet away from you. “That’s alright, though.” It was only a matter of time before you and Calum would welcome Baby Hood into the world, and you were ecstatic to soon have your first child with the love of your life.

You pushed yourself back up with a grunt, reaching for a cherry tomato.

“Daddy and I can’t wait to meet you,” you whispered, pulling the tomato from the vine and dropping it into the bowl. “We’ve got everything ready for you, little one. A nursery, clothes, toys, all of it. In a couple months after you’ve grown some more, you can come out and have it.”

A smile tugged at your lips as you pulled a weed from the soil.

“I’m so excited to finally have you out of my tummy and in my arms, baby.”

You continued to utter sweet words to your child as, unbeknownst to you, Calum listened to the entire thing. A large grin was plastered on his face, and he eventually leaned the hedge trimmers against the fence and just listened. Listened to you talk to the baby, shower the child with the love and affection that was plentiful in your heart. It was a wonderful sight to him, seeing his wife speaking to his child, your child, in the most adorable manner. You hardly even noticed that you were talking; it had become second nature to talk to your baby, and he frequently did the same. Typically you were alone, but now, you happened to be just a few feet away from Calum.

You sat back onto your heels again, having finished picking veggies and weeding. Your hand returned to your stomach, gently rubbing your thumb over the fabric of your shirt.

“Mommy loves you very much,” you mumbled softly, grinning from ear to ear.

Calum quickly scurried over, getting on his knees beside you.

“And Daddy loves you too,” he quipped, placing his hand over yours.

You jumped, having completely forgotten that he was even outside with you. You placed your free hand over your chest, letting out a breathy laugh.

“Geez, you scared me!” You exclaimed with a smile. Your face then faltered, realizing he must have listened to everything you were saying. “Guess you heard all the corny baby talk, huh?”

Calum chuckled, wrapping an arm around your shoulders.

“It was cute,” he mused, pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead. “You’re cute.”

Heat rose to your cheeks, and you leaned your head against his shoulder. Before you could say anything else, Calum spoke up.

“I love you, princess. And I love you, little one,” he said as he rubbed his hand over your bump. Suddenly, you felt a hit to your insides. Calum must have felt it too, because his face lit up like the sun.

“They kicked!” You exclaimed, meeting his eyes with a bright smile. It wasn’t the first time you felt the baby kicking, but it never ceased to amaze you. That was a living baby inside you, a living baby that you and Calum made yourselves with love, and some time soon, you could have the baby for real and actually be parents.

“She’s totally a daddy’s girl,” he mumbled with a smirk.

You giggled, giving him a quizzical look.

“Who says it’s a girl?” You questioned and tilted your head to the side. Calum shrugged in response, still looking smug.

“I’ve got a feeling.”

“Oh yeah? Well, I’ve got a feeling he’s a boy.”

He rolled his eyes playfully, pressing his lips against yours for a moment.

“Guess we’ll have to see about that, won’t we?”

“Guess so.”

Calum pushed himself to his feet, holding his hand out to help you up. You gladly took it, grunting as you carefully stood.

“Man, my baby boy really makes this tough,” you trailed off, just to tease him. He laughed and shook his head, keeping his hand on your arm to steady you.

“Nah, that’s my baby girl in there,” he teased right back, giving your bump a gentle poke with his slender finger. You playfully slapped his shoulder, and he kissed you again.

“You should go inside and cool off, Y/N. I can finish up out here,” he mumbled as he pulled away, face turning a little more serious than before.

“Cal, I’m fi-”

“Please? For the sake of my sanity?” He pleaded, jutting his bottom lip out dramatically. You sighed, unable to resist that puppy face of his.

“Okay, okay,” you chuckled, and Calum broke out into a grin. Tilting your head up, you gave him one last kiss before turning around to head back inside.

“I’ll be in there soon,” he called out as you walked, and you shot him a thumbs up over your head. He smiled in adoration, watching to make sure you got inside before picking up the hedge trimmers again.

He was beyond excited to have the baby, but he could settle for little talks through your stomach until then.

[forever-more-never-again]

Kids These Days

Requested: Anonymous

For the longest time, I couldn’t figure out where I wanted this to go, and then inspiration just seemed to hit me out of nowhere! I hope you like it!

Pairing: Bucky X Natasha, Parents!BuckyNat X Kid!Reader

Word Count:4724

Warnings: Swearing, Child abuse, Death, Blood, Psychopathic tendencies, angst!

Request: A fic where Natasha and Bucky have a daughter. They are never home so she was raised by maids. Then Buckynat and the avengers need somewhere to lay low off the map. The daughter inherited the personalities of the winter soldier and Black widow. So she is very cold.She is a bad girl and very uncaring. She hasn't seen her parents since she was 9. Very angsty and the avengers including Captain America are in shock of the kids existence.

A/n: I split this so it goes between second person and third person writing

Masterlist

Bucky glanced up from his book when he heard the frantic footsteps pounding down the hallway of the tower. Setting it aside, he saw Natasha running in.

“Nat? What’s going on?” Bucky stood up, immediately on guard for a threat.

Natasha shook her head, grabbing Bucky’s arm, “Steve said to meet him on the quinjet, something about a setup.”

Bucky growled, grabbing Natasha’s arm and running with her to the loading bay.

Aboard the quinjet, Bucky cornered Steve, “What’s going on Steve? Why is everyone here?”

He glanced back at the Avengers. Everyone was aboard the quinjet, Tony, Bruce, Vision, Wanda, Sam, Clint, Rhodey… everyone.

Steve ran a hand down his face, looking haggard, “Someone set us up. It looks like the Avengers were responsible for the bombings in Israel and New York.”

Natasha walked up and placed a hand on Bucky’s shoulder, “Why would someone do that?”

Steve laughed, without humor, “Why wouldn’t they? We’re the Avengers, having enemies is just part of the job. Anyways, we need a place to lay low until the heat passes over. I need ideas. Anyone?”

Silence. No one moved. Steve looked over at Clint, a plea in his eyes.

Clint raised his hands, “Oh no. I already let you guys invade Laura’s space once. That was enough anxiety to last a lifetime. I don’t want her in the hotspot again.”

Steve struggled with getting his nerves under control as he groaned and curled his fists up by his side.

Bucky watched his friend struggle and glanced over at Nat, raising a brow.

Natasha glared, shaking her head back at him.

Bucky tilted his chin towards Steve, eyes wide.

Natasha’s glare dimmed, but she still wore a frown as she shrugged.

“What sort of Jedi mind tricks are you two up to?”

Bucky and Natasha jumped as Tony appeared behind them.

Bucky growled, “Stark.”

Tony smirked, “Barnes. So, care to share with the class what you and your russian lover were debating?”

Natasha turned her glare onto Tony, “Just because we have hooked up before does not give you the right to call us lovers. We are amicable but for now, we are just friends.”

Tony raised his hands, “Okay. Alright, but you still haven’t answered.”

Steve stepped up, “Please, Bucky...Nat...If you know somewhere it would be a big help.”

Bucky sighed, “Alright, I’ll input the coordinates. But you guys...You’re about to learn a bunch of stuff that should’ve been kept in the dark.”

And with that ominous statement, he and Natasha walked up to the console and began flying the quinjet.

******

You screamed out as you slide down the banister, “Ooooh Mr. Reed! I’m coming for you!”

You jumped off near the end, landing perfectly in a pirouette.

A cold grin on your face, you strolled through the mansion you called home. Peeking into doorways and hallways, “Oooh Mr. Reed! You know you can’t hide forever!” You stilled as you cocked your head. The very faint sound of breathing hit you, you closed your eyes and opened your senses.

Dimly, you could hear the shallow breathing of someone trying to mask fear, you could hear the slow drip of sweat onto hardwood floor, smell the desperation.

Snapping your eyes open, you drew out your blade from your thigh sheath.

Balancing on the balls of your feet, you silently prowled towards the linen closet.

You poised, and quick as a snake, reached out and yanked the door open.

You stared maliciously at the cowering man on the floor, “Hello Mr. Reed.” And with that, you brought your knife down.

Later that evening, you sat on a couch, humming to yourself as you cleaned blood off your knife. Holding it up to the chandelier light, you inspected your reflection in the silver gleam.

Your [e/c] eyes held no warmth, and you grinned at yourself. You were only [y/age], and yet already you knew how cruel and uncaring the world was.

You were interrupted from your musings by the sound of a jet engine.

Scowling, you walked to the front door and pulled open the ornate, double doors. Peering around the grounds, you saw the incoming black jet.

Your expression turned confused as you watched it land in the open grass. No one came here. You were left in Norway for a reason...Because it was vast and empty.

When you saw who strolled off the jet, your mouth dropped open.

The figures came closer and you gripped your knife in you hand, as your lips stretched into a thin line.

Finally, they stood before you.

The man spoke first, “Hello…[Y/n].”

You snarled, “Hello...Father.”

A blonde man stepped up, shock written all over him, “Woah! Woah! Father? Bucky, What the Hell!?” You smiled serenely at Bucky as he glared down at you, “Yeah, Father,” You put emphasis on the title as you oozed innocence, “Please do explain exactly ‘what the hell’ is going on.”

At that point Natasha stepped up and pointed a warning finger in you direction, “You watch your mouth.”

Your eyes opened wide, in fake astonishment, “Oh no! Mother! I couldn’t possibly understand what you’re implying...after all,” You dropped the act and snarled menacingly, “My mother and father only had me out of wedlock, trained me as an assassin before I could walk, and let’s not forget the cherry on top...you both abandoned me here in Norway with no way out when i was Nine years old!” You ended your rant in a scream.

A woman with strawberry blonde hair stepped forward this time, her brow scrunched, “Nat? Bucky? How did you hide this? Is it true?”

Bucky sighed, his metal arm flexing. He turned to look at you, resignation on his face, “[Y/n]. Let us in.”

You sneered at him, but backed away from the door. Turning your back, you walked back into the first parlor and went back to cleaning your knife.

The group followed Bucky who followed you.

You hid a smirk at their shocked expression.

The parlor was a disaster. You had torn the couches to shreds, you were currently sitting on just the springs on one. The carpet was splattered with stains. And on the coffee table was the dead body of one Mr. Reeds.

Bucky snorted in rage through his nose as he yelled at you, “What did you do!?” You rolled your eyes, “Oh please, Barnes. You lost the right to yell at me when you left me year alone for years.”

Natasha stepped up beside Bucky, “We left you with Mr. Reeds. Who now appears to be dead.”

You shrugged, turning your attention to your knife again, “He was going to call the cops and turn me in.”

Another man stepped forward, this one short and brunette with a goatee, “Turn you in? Is anyone else still super confused about what is going on? Barnes, you promised a safe house, not a...whatever this is.” He waved to encompass the room and you.

You began tossing the knife up and catching it deftly as it fell back down, “Oh please, this should be good.”

Bucky and Natasha sighed and glanced at each other before turning to the team, “Alright, Steve, Tony….This is our child, [Y/n].”

“Child? How come there’s no record and how come Wanda didn’t know?” Steve turned to Wanda, her eyes were red as she stared you down.

You quirked an eyebrow at her and blew her a kiss.”

“I can’t read them. They are blocking me somehow.” She murmured.

Bucky sighed, “Yes, that’s something we trained into them from a young age. It’s also why Wanda doesn’t know about them. Me and Natasha have gotten really good about blocking any thoughts about them from our mind. As for the records, you do remember you are talking to two ex-KGB world renowned assassins? Right?”

Everyone seemed to remember and nod.

You yawned, drawing the attention back to you. “This is boring. What are you doing here anyways?” Natasha turned her back on you, ignoring you, while Bucky gritted his teeth and replied, “We just need to lay low for a while. Then we’ll be gone.”

Your eyes hardened to flint, “Great! Can’t wait! Until then, stay out my way and I’ll stay out of yours.” And with that you left the room.

*****

Bucky and Natasha let out deep sighs as the tension from their shoulders rolled off.

Steve stood, bewildered, “Buck? You have a kid?”

Bucky shook his head, frowning, “I don’t like to talk about them. At all.”

Natasha spoke up, “We made a mistake one night, and that was the result.”

Steve glowered at them, “A mistake? You abandoned your child! What even is all this?” He gestured to the destroyed room, the mansion and the dead body.

Bucky sighed again, “We never thought it would happen.”

Natasha rested an hand on Bucky’s arm, “After all, I thought I was sterilized, that I couldn’t have children.”

Bucky let out a hollow laugh, “Turns out that she could. And we were both so excited at first.”

Natasha grinned softly, “Finally, something that we could do right.” Bucky smiled softly as well, raising a hand to grip the one that Natasha had on his arm, “When [Y/n] was born, we were both so scared about what life they would have. That’s why we hid the pregnancy and the birth.”

Natasha sighed, looking down at the floor, “As they grew up, it became obvious that my enhancements and Bucky’s winter soldier serum had played a factor in their DNA.” Bucky flexed his metal arm, the plates shifting, “From a very young age, they showed a lack of empathy. They had a little extra strength and flexibility than was normal for a child.” Natasha’s voice grew low as she talked, “They enjoyed inflicting pain. Their nannies...Each time we came to check in, they would leave screaming about the ‘devil child’.” Bucky looked up at the ceiling. By now the room was dead silent as everyone was fixated on Bucky and Nat’s story.

Bucky continued, “By the time they reached Nine years old, they were a menace, and a threat.”

Natasha took up, “Neighbors began complaining about missing pets, or pets showing up mutilated on their porches.”

Bucky seemed to be in pain as he went on, “We walked in on them sewing a dog’s head onto a cat’s body….laughing.”

Wanda and Bruce flinched as Clint and Steve gagged.

Natasha nodded, seeing their distress, “We were shocked, how did we not see it sooner? We thought we had raised them well. Trained them in ways of protection and self defense. We thought they might join the Avengers when they were grown. We never saw the monster they had become until it was too late.”

Tony spoke up, “So they are a mix of the Black Widow and the Winter Soldier, and not Natasha Romanoff and James Barnes?” Bucky nodded, “Essentially. But they are our child, we couldn’t just kill them or lock them up.”

Natasha’s green eyes held a glint of unshed tears, “I thought I could right the wrongs of my past through giving my love to a child, but it just proved that I am truly unredeemable.”

Bucky looked up at her, giving her strength, before returning his focus to the group in front of him, “We brought her here, to Norway. Bought this mansion and the surrounding lands. Gated it off and told everyone it was abandoned and condemned so that they wouldn't bother with it.”

Natasha swallowed thickly, “We thought we were doing the right thing. We thought that if we removed ourselves, they might grow into a normal person. We left them here with Mr. Reeds.”

She glanced balefully down at the dead body on the coffee table in the middle of the room.

Bucky followed her gaze, “That didn’t seem to work out after all though.”

Tony spoke up, his voice layered in confusion and shock, “So you’re parents to a super child who is a psychopath and you didn’t think the team deserved to know that!?”

Steve spoke up before Bucky could fire back a retort, “Stark’s right. Bucky, we deserved to know. This could affect us all.”

****

As the group that arrived with your parents continued their inquisition, you wondered up to the roof of the mansion, overlooking the grassy plains that you were raised knowing.

Picking up the bow and arrow you stashed up there, you aimed for the quinjet.

Narrowing your gaze, you exhaled, and released.

“Yes!” Your aim was true and you did a little dance as the arrow protruded from the front of the jet.

Sighing, you sat down on the edge of the roof, dangling your legs over the edge.

Looking down, you weren’t afraid of the fall, rather, you felt nothing.

The wind picked up and you inched closer to the edge, only your hands gripping the edge keeping you from falling two stories to the hard ground.

“[Y/n].”

You turned to face your mother. Natasha. The Black Widow.

You brought yourself back onto the roof, dusting off your pants, “Hello. Where is everyone else?” Natasha’s eyes narrowed, “Don’t play coy.” You laughed, clutching your stomach as you bent over, wiping fake tears from your eyes, you switched back to uncaring, “I’m not. I simply wish to be aware of everyone’s activities as you are in my realm.” “You’re realm?” Natasha raised a brow.

You placed your hands on your hips, “Yes. Mine.”

Natasha tensed and then relaxed, blowing out air she spoke softly, “[Y/n]. What happened to you? You were such a cute kid...and now. Dead bodies, threatening behaviour? What was Mr. Reed going to turn you in for?” You growled, lips curling up in a manic grin, “Nothing that can be proven...now. And why do you care mommy dearest? After all,” You walked over, circling Natasha on the roof, “You did leave me here to die alone. Couldn’t face the mistake that was your child. You are ashamed of me! Scared of my greatness! Of what I could achieve if unleashed on the world!”

Natasha glared, “You’re right on one account. Which is why you will not be unleashed to the world. Here is where you will stay and die. You are my child, and some part of me still loves you. But I can not deny that you are psychotic and mentally unstable.”

You laughed again, this time truly finding the situation hilarious, “You think you can keep me here forever mother? Let me tell you,” You stood up and pointed at her, “I am not some little pet,” You spat the word, “To be kept in a cage. If I want freedom I will have it.”

You walked past Natasha, bumping into her roughly.

You wound your way down the stairs, hearing raised voices coming from the kitchen.

Smiling, you leaned against the doorway as you watched the argument ensue.

“You should have told me Buck. I thought we were friends!”

“We are Steve. It’s just...complicated”

“And you say you and Natasha aren't lovers.”

“You shut your mouth Stark!”

“Guys, calm down!”

“Stay out of this Wanda, I believe this is not a matter for us.”

Slowly, you started clapping. The noise died down as everyone turned to face you. “That was quite the performance! I’m terribly sorry for not introducing myself earlier, I’m [Y/n] Barnes-Romanoff. But you may call me GenZ.”

You walked past everyone and opened the fridge, taking out an apple, you bit into it, and gestured to everyone, “And you guys are..?” You raised a brow, taking another bite.

Bucky sighed, “This is Steve, Tony, Clint, Bruce, Rhodey, Sam, Wanda and Vision.” You nodded, “And how do you all know the two murderous bitches?” Bucky glared at you as you smirked and blew a kiss at him.

Steve cleared his throat and you smiled at how nervous he was, you inhaled the sweat coming from his pores.

“We are apart of the Avengers. We apologize for not knowing about your presence beforehand.” You grinned, throwing your core at Bucky you caught it and grumbled as he threw it in the garbage.

You skipped over to Steve and flattened your hands on his suit clad chest, “At least one of you has manners. You’re such a strong man for having so much fear coming off of you in waves.” You closed your eyes and inhaled deeply.

You felt hands close around your wrist and a body behind you.

Whirling, you threw your arms out breaking the restraints and glared at you mother, “Black Widow.” She glared, “[Y/n].”

You threw a sulty smirk over your shoulder to the shell shocked Steve, “Guess it just wasn’t meant to be. Shame.” You glanced down at his crotch, licking your lips you met his eyes again, “It would’ve been fun fooling around with one of my father’s friends. Like something from a porno.”

“[Y/n].” Your mother and father growled in warning.

You raised your hands and walked back over to the doorway, smiling wide, “Okay, Alright. Anyways, what are you doing here? I know it wasn’t because you missed me.”

Steve shook his head, looking like a golden retriever shaking off water. You snorted, raising a hand to your mouth to block a chuckle from escaping.

“We’re just laying low from the government for a while till some messes die down.”

You perked up, “Sounds messy. Need anyone killed?”

Bruce and Clint looked sick as they saw the excitement and glee radiating from your eyes.

You wiggled your fingers at them, grinning.

“[Y/n]. Enough!” Natasha shouted. You pouted.

“Aww, I never get to have any fun. Well, I’m going to practice. Toodles!” You cheered, skipping out of the room.

As you exited out of sight, you immediately began running upstairs.

At the end of one of the hallways, you crouched down beside the wall and pressed lightly against a nearly invisible seam in the wallpaper.

The secret door opened with a hiss of pressurized air and you slid inside, silently shutting the door behind you.

Walking down the stairs that mirrored the ones that you had just run up, you entered your secret layer.

In the darkness below, in a hidden room behind the living room, was where you had your stash of computers, phones, cameras and gear.

“Thank you Mr. Reed.” You mumbled as you situated yourself in your rolling computer chair.

You turned on a set of monitors, your hidden cameras in the kitchen waking up and fixating on the scene.

You grinned at your parents and their friends, all unaware that you were now listening in on their conversation.

You turned to another monitor and booted up the internet. You searched for the ‘Avengers’ and became shocked at everything that popped up.

“Seems you think you’re some sort of heroes.” You mumbled as you scrolled through newspaper clippings raving about the heroic efforts of the Winter Soldier and Black Widow.

You felt your anger rising up and took a deep breath through the nose, “It’s okay [Y/n]. You’ll get your revenge shortly.”

You finally found the jackpot. Scrolling, you mumbled along to yourself, “The fugitives previously called the Avengers, are being called to come forth for their efforts in bombing Israel and New York. If anyone sees them or knows any information, please dial the hotline or call the police. Do not engage under any circumstance.”

A glow came into your eyes as you saw the digital reflection of yourself in the computer screen grin back at you, “Oh boy. This is gonna be good.”

And with that, you picked up a phone and dialed, “Yes, hello. I have information about where the Avengers are right at this moment…” You turned to glance at the monitor showing the argument going on in the kitchen, “Yes, I can hold…” Your smiled felt like it might break you face.

******

A couple hours later, you walked out and sat on the front porch. Soon, Steve came out and sat next to you.

“So..uh, you’re Bucks kid.” You nodded, staring off in the distance, “Winter Soldier 2.0 Better than the original.” Steve coughed, “So it’s [Y/n], right?” You side eyed Steve, “Why are you trying to get familiar?” Steve paused, then frowned, “I’m not sure. But I just found out my childhood friend has a kid who I never knew about.”

You chuckled, “It’s not something he likes to brag about.” You picked up a stone laying next to you and flung it out. It went soaring before thudding back to the ground.

Steve looked at where it dropped, “So you and your father don’t get along?” You smirked, “Father, Mother, World. No one gets along with me. I’m better than all of them. Didn’t you hear the sob story my dear mother and father spun? They left me! Abandoned me! I was nine! I just wanted their approval! They were the ones who trained me afterall! I knew how to snap a full grown men’s neck twenty different ways before I could sing the alphabet.”

You took a deep breathe, bringing your rising emotions back down.

Turning, you saw Steve staring, horrified at you.

You smiled, curling up your lips, you spread your legs and pressed your palms to the ground between them, leaning towards him.

“What are…? What?” Steve scrambled back a little, looking around but there was no one else outside at the moment.

You crooked a finger, “Let me let you in on a secret. My parents? They’re scared of me. They know I’m stronger than them. That’s why they kept me hidden in this hellhole.”

Steve struggled to regain his composure, “Well [Y/n]...You are dangerous. I mean, you killed your caretaker.”

You waved Steve’s words off, “He was a necessary casualty. It was self-preservation. Although,” You laughed as you thought back to the previous evening, “It was delicious hunting him down. He should have known he couldn’t hide from me. I’m the offspring of the Black Widow and the Winter Soldier after all.”

Before Steve could respond, the sounds of sirens and helicopters filled the area. You grinned up at the sky.

“It seems our little heart to heart has to end.”

Steve stood up, defensive posture settling quickly, “What did you do?” You stood up as well and placed your hands together and lowered your gaze, “Me? I just did as any law abiding citizen would do. I reported information of wanted fugitives to the necessary authorities.”

Steve growled and ran back inside. You followed him, walking leisurely down the hallway as the sirens and wails got louder.

*****

Bucky and Natasha stopped talking when Steve ran into the kitchen, breathless.

“Steve? What’s wrong?”

Steve glared over his shoulder, “We have a situation. Your spawn called the authorities. There are helicopters and vans surrounding the grounds as we speak.”

Bucky slammed his metal fist into the counter, leaving a dent.

“And you guys say I have anger issues.” He turned to stare at his kid.

“What do you plan to accomplish by turning us in, [Y/n]? Is it revenge you want?”

[Y/n] grinned, “You read my mind Father of mine. Now do be a dear and walk out of here without a fight.”

Bucky turned away from them, facing Wanda and Vision, “Do you think you too could get to the jet and bring it up to the roof?”

Vision nodded as Wanda began glowing, “We’ll be back shortly, be ready.”

They left, as everyone began running up to the roof.

Natasha and Bucky were the last ones, and they turned to face their kid.

[Y/n] was breathing fast and furious through their nose, their eyes filled with brimstone, “No! You do not get to escape this time! You do not get to leave me again!” They whipped their knife out of their sheath and ran at their parents.

Bucky and Natsha ducked and ran around them, heading up to the roof.

There, the sky began to darken as a storm came rolling in off the coast.

The Jet was already there, as everyone piled in.

[Y/n] reached the roof as Natasha was climbing in.

The sky was lit up with a streak of lightning, the wind mixing in with the howl of the sirens and helicopters.

“You don’t get to leave me again!” They screamed, running towards the helicopter.

Natasha jumped in, followed by Bucky.

“Go!” He yelled. Vision nodded and began raising the jet.

[Y/n] stuck the knife between their teeth and jumped. It would have been impossible, had they not held the DNA of Nat and Bucky. The jet shuddered as they gripped onto one of the wings.

A thunderous boom filled the air and then rain began pounding to the ground.

[Y/n] pulled themselves up and the sight that the Avengers saw through the window was horrifying.

They squatted on the wing, brandishing their knife, hair flying around their face. What struck fear into Bucky and Natasha’s hearts was the look in their kids eyes.

And their smile...it was twisted, demented.

“Get us out of here Vision!” Tony screamed, not looking away from [Y/n] as they ran, somehow keeping their balance on the floating jet, towards the window.

They jumped and slammed their knife against the glass, causing fractures to appear.

“Anytime now!” Tony yelled again.

Vision yelled back, “There’s FBI Helicopters everywhere and lightning! Do you want to fly this thing!?” Just then, another lightening bolt streaked, illuminating the frightening grin of [Y/n] as they banged their fists on the glass, more fractures appearing.

As the thunder rolled across the sky, the glass finally broke.

The inside of the jet was suddenly filled with the howling wind and rain pelting them as they shielded their eyes.

Bucky and Natasha ran forward, stepping in between their kid and the Avengers.

[Y/n] leaned against the shattered glass, not seeming to mind the shards that pierced their skin. The blood washing away in the rain.

“Where do you think you’re all going?” They asked, as if making pleasant conversation.

Clint whispered to Tony, “What the hell!? What the hell!? How do we escape the child of the Winter Soldier and the Black Widow?”

A streak of lightning appeared in front of the jet and Vision yanked on the steering, causing the jet to tip to the side to avoid being hit.

[Y/n] screamed as they fell out of the window.

Natasha and Bucky rushed forward, each grabbing onto a wrist, keeping [Y/n] from falling thousands of feet to their death.

They looked up at their parents, tears mixing with the rain as their hair became plastered to their scalp, “I just wanted you guys to want me! I just wanted your love! Why didn’t you love me!?” They yelled up at them.

Tears pricked Bucky’s eyes and he looked over to see Natasha silently crying as she looked down at her child.

“[Y/n], you’ve got the chance to change. We can help you!” She yelled down, trying to be heard over the thunder and sirens.”

[Y/n] chuckled darkly, “You’re just saying that because you’re scared. You’ll never let me reach my full potential!” With that, they ripped their wrist from Bucky’s grasp, the hand that held the knife, and using Natasha’s grip, pulled themselves up and slashed at her.

Bucky pulled Natasha back at the last moment. The knife barely grazing her cheek.

“Just die already!” [Y/n] screamed, their voice cracking on a ragged sob.

“We’re so sorry [Y/n]. We failed you.” Bucky stared solemnly down at their kid. And then, with a deep breath, he pried Natasha’s hand from their wrist.

“No!” [Y/n]’s screams faded as they plummeted to the ground, ending with a dull thud that seemed to be louder than the thunder and sirens combined.

Natasha tucked her face into Bucky’s chest as she released her sobs into giant heaves.

“Vision...get us out of here.” Bucky calmly stated.

He stared down at the ground where his child lay broken as the jet vanished over the skyline, helicopters chasing it in the pouring rain.

FOREVER Taglist:

@sxph-t @littlestfangirl @rainydaysrnevergrey @not-jk-rowling @sociallyawkwardcircus-freak-hi @ayyidkeither

Natasha Taglist:

@ludwigvonbaethoven @hanjiscience-slut @kitten-q-p @morbid-gaymer @honeybadgerwhodoesntcare @sunnyandtwisty @zoeyknight @kurlyafro @thewomanofwonder @5aftermidnight

Bucky Taglist:

@evyiione

Avengers taglist:

@jadepc

[my-emotional-self]

Save Me (Eric Coulter x Reader)

Pairings: Eric Coulter x Reader

Word Count: 3.6k+

Warnings: Swearing, Angst, Fluff, Smut

Trigger Warnings:  Past Abuse (physical, mental, emotional, verbal)

Request: Can I have an eric imagine where the reader is from Amity and its visiting day and he protects her from her mean parents and eric and the reader slowly start falling for each other and then at the end they get together.  And can it have smut if you do smut:@jasonmccannsgirl8699

Requested Dialogue: “Do. Not. Tempt. Me” and “I’m lost without you” : anonymous

Request: Your writing is amazing! Can you please do one where reader is bickering with Eric Coulter and she ends up kissing him, and at first he glares at the reader before pulling them back into the kiss? : anonymous

A/N: I threw three requests into one because I had so many Eric Coulter requests!

“Again initiate” Eric barked out causing you to flinch.  It had already been a long day with training, but it was made even worse when Eric caught you rolling your eyes at him.  It was an honest mistake; something you always did and Eric wasn’t too happy about it. And so, here you were, doing extra training late into the evening with him as your ‘punishment’.

Your arms burned and your legs felt weak as you continued to punch the bag.  Each time Eric yelling at you or raising your voice it made you flinch; memories of back home rushing back to you.  Naturally, your test results came back Amity, but you couldn’t stay there any longer; not with your parents and how badly they treated you. Cando and Erudite were not even in question; you lied all the time to save yourself from your parents and you weren’t a genius.  That left only Abnegation and Dauntless.  In the end, you chose Dauntless because you wanted to fight back, never having the chance to when you were younger.  You wanted to be able to stand up for yourself, but you were soon learning that it was a lot more challenging than you thought.  

Eric groaned out in annoyance as he stalked towards you.  “You’re still doing it wrong initiate!”  You felt him come up behind you and you cowered in response; his hand gripping your arm, not hard, and you let out a whimper.  He quickly removed his hand from your arm.  “I didn’t even grab you hard.  What the hell is wrong with you?  If you can’t manage this, how the hell are you going to manage hand to hand fighting?”

Lowering your head, you tried to fight back the tears.  You wanted to prove to Eric, to your parents, and to yourself that you could do this. But memories from your past kept blocking you from moving forward.  

“I’m…I’m sorry.  It’s just…my…my past….” You trailed off, not even finding the words to say.  Eric bent down so he could look at your face; your eyes connecting with his for a mere moment.  When he glanced at your face, his eyes softened with curiosity.  He could see the hurt, the sadness in your eyes but he didn’t know what caused it.  

He straightened his back; his large frame towering over you.  “Initiate look at me” he declared more gently this time.  Slowly, you lifted your head up to meet his gaze. His face was still soft and he didn’t have his usual permanent scowl attached to his face.  No, this was different; this was a different side of Eric you had never seen before.  “Is everything alright?  You can talk to me.  I am a Leader after all.  I know I come off intimidating, but that’s mainly to scare the initiates in training.”

You had to hold back another instinctual eye roll as you didn’t want to get more punishments. Shaking your head rapidly, you wiped your tears away.  “No. No I’m ok, just tired” you whispered out.  

Glancing back up at his face, you could see his jaw clenching as his arms folded over his chest. “Alright.  Get to bed then.”

That night as you lay awake in bed your mind drifted off to Eric.  When you first saw him after jumping from the train and onto the roof your immediate reaction was how attractive he was.  His strong and tall build, his light hair shaved at the sides, his strong chiseled jaw and he had the most beautiful eyes you had ever seen. But then he had to open his mouth and he really started to frighten you; in a sense reminding you of your parents. Closing your eyes, your mind retraced what happened that evening; how you shuddered at his touch.  You weren’t expecting it and it was usually just a general reaction when somebody touched you; but you didn’t want Eric to pull away. His touch electrified you, igniting feelings deep down.  As you drifted to sleep, you only hoped that it wouldn’t be the last time he touched you.

~~~

Ever since that evening with Eric and your ‘punishment’ you had been doing much better.  Eric’s gentle grip on your arm stirred a fire within you; a fire to become stronger, to excel.  You put all your extra time into more training; many times by yourself, other times Eric was in the gym and would help you.  The two of you didn’t speak too much; just him telling you how to throw your punches or to block better.  

In the end, after the first stage of initiation, you ended up placing 9th and you were really proud of yourself.  

“Listen up Initiates” Four demanded as everyone gathered around him.  Eric was standing to his left and your eyes met his; your heart fluttered in your chest at the small smirk he gave you.  “Get some rest tonight.  Tomorrow we start Fear Landscapes.  If you thought the first stage of training was hard, just wait.”

Your heart sunk as Four’s words swirled in your mind.  Your hands clasped tightly together as your mind raced.  They were going to see what happened; they were going to know what happened to you in your old faction.  A single tear rolled down your cheek and you quickly wiped it away, hoping no one would see, but you were wrong.  Glancing up, you saw Eric was watching you; his jaw clenched tightly as his brows furrowed.

~~~

That night you struggled to get any sleep.  You tossed and turned well into the morning before exhaustion finally took you.  

You and the rest of the initiates were gathered in a room; one by one going into a separate room to do the Fear Landscape.  Both Four and Eric were administering the landscapes today; each in a different room to help move things along a bit faster.  

It was down to you and one other initiate left in the room.  Nerves wracked your body as you watched each person come out of the room looking distraught.  

“Y/N” Eric called your name from the doorway as you got up on shaky legs.  You tried to control your breathing as he motioned for you to sit down in the chair.  ��I’m going to inject you with this serum” he stated calmly as you nodded your head to him. He gently swept your hair away from your neck; his fingers trailing lightly on your skin causing goosebumps to erupt.  The delicate way his rough fingers brushed upon you sent shivers down your spine and straight to your core.  You bit down on your lip as you felt the pinch of the needle at your neck. Everything went black in seconds.

You were back home, in your parents’ house when you opened your eyes; your heart rate rocketing at once.  A loud crashing noise startled you make you jump as you quietly walked down the stairs.  Your parents were fighting with each other as usual; the house a mess from their wreckage.

A creak on the floorboards caused them to turn to you; your eyes going wide as your father stalked towards you.  “I thought I told you to stay in your room you worthless piece of shit” he bellowed as he raised his hand, slapping you across the face.  You cupped your heated cheek; your mother now walking towards you.  

“Oh please, like she could ever do ANYTHING right!  How did you even last this long huh?” she screamed at you as her hands fisted in your hair, tugging your face forward as you cried out. “I wish you had never been born” she seethed through gritted teeth as her free hand punched you in the side; your ribs exploding in pain.  She let go of your hair and you dropped to the floor, curling up into a ball as you sobbed.  

“Please stop” you cried out as your father continued to kick at your back; the wind getting knocked out of you as you struggled to breath.

Your mothers sinister laugh broke through your sobs.  “Look at you down there.  So pathetic Y/N.  Nobody will ever love a pathetic worthless person like you!” she spat, giving you one last kick before everything faded to black.  

You gasped for air as you jolted upright; a hand on your arm causing you to jerk away defensively as you jumped off the bed and scrambled to the corner of the room.  You placed your hands on your head as you rocked back and forth; the only thing that used to sooth you when you were growing up in that hell house with your parents.  

You felt calloused hands gently grasp your wrists as you jerked away, whimpering from the touch before you realized it was Eric.  He was staring down at you, his eyes wide and you did the only thing you could think of in that moment; you wrapped your arms around his neck and held on for dear life. Your sobs wracked your body and you didn’t even care about it; in this moment, Eric hugged you back and you felt safe in his arms.  

Eric laid down, his feet stretching out as he pulled you onto his lap; your grip around his neck never faltering.  His large arms wrapped around your back as he pulled you close.  “Ssshhh, it’s alright.  It wasn’t real, it was just your fear landscape” he soothed as he rocked you back and forth.  You didn’t know how to explain it, but being in Eric’s arms eased you, calmed you to be exact.  Your sobs shortened to mere whimpers as you pulled away, locking eyes with his.  

“But it was real Eric” you snuffled out as he wiped your tears from your face.  “It….it happened.  It felt so real because it was real.”

Eric looked down at you in sadness; his heart constricting with anger that someone, your parents, could do something like that to their child.  His jaw clenched and you could hear his teeth grinding from the pressure.

“Come on.  Let’s get you back to the dorms” he spoke softly as he helped to lift you off him.  

~~~

That night, and most of the nights to come you barely got any sleep; your fear landscape bringing back vivid memories and each time you closed your eyes, you saw your parents beating you.  Dark circles began to plague under your eyes as you continued to yawn throughout your days.

What made everything even more worse, was that Visiting Day had arrived and you didn’t know at all if your parents were going to come.  You hoped your lucky stars that they wouldn’t; that they would just stay back in Amity and not bother coming to see you.  Why would they want to see you anyways?  They always said you were worthless, so they wouldn’t bother coming to visit, right? Oh how wrong you were!

Everyone was gathered in the pit, the rest of the initiates greeting their loving parents with hugs and kisses as you stood there by yourself.  You felt as if you were being watched and you scanned the crowd.  Looking up, you saw that Eric was standing up above with Max and Four, his gaze centered on you.  You felt your face heat up; your heart doing racing.  In a moments time; Eric’s gaze on you went from a gentle smirk, to a dangerous scowl.  

“Why is he mad?” you said aloud to yourself, your brows furrowing.  Your breath all but ceased as you felt a hand on your shoulder; you knew that hand, knew who it was.  Slowly, you turned around to see your parents standing there with the fakest smiles on their faces.  

“H-hi” you croaked out as your eyes darted between them.  Panic began to rise in your body as you knees shook.  

“Well if it isn’t out little Dauntless daughter” your mother said sarcastically with a sinister smirk. “I’m surprised you are still here. We figured you would be factionless by now.”

As the panic bubbled throughout your body, you tried to remain calm and focus on your breathing but nothing was happening.  It felt like the world stopped; there was nobody but you and your parents here. Your lips parted, trying to find some way to come back with words, or physical defense, but nothing came to; nothing but Eric.  

He quickly saddled up to you, his arm coming around your shoulders and pulling him close.  “Hi, you must be Y/N’s parents.  I’m Eric, one of the leaders here at Dauntless” he said cheerily as he held out his hand to your parents.  

“Yes, we are” your father retorted, shaking Eric’s hand before your mother did the same.  “I have to say, we are surprised she made it this long. We thought she would be factionless by now.  Y/N here never did have the heart to fight.”

Your eyes narrowed as you felt Eric grip you closer to him; his warmth radiating off of him and making you feel content, safe in his arms.  “Well, Y/N here has been doing exceptionally well and we see her going far in our faction” Eric replied and you could tell he was starting to get angry and frustrated with your parents.  

Eric leaned forward as he whispered to your parents.  “Now why don’t the two of you get the fuck out of here before I cause a scene?”  He glared murderous daggers at your parents as he kept a cool hand on your back.  

Your parents’ looked from Eric, and back to you before leaving the Pit; not even bothering to say goodbye and you had to admit, you didn’t mind one bit.  It felt as if the air came rushing back into your lungs and you could breathe again.  

Tilting your head up, you gave Eric a small smile, thanking him as he reciprocated it.  “I’ll walk you back to the dorms” Eric’s hot breath fanned at your earlobe causing you to shudder.  He held his hand to your back as you walked forward, leading the way.  

With his hand on you, desire started to pool in your belly as your body turned warm with delight. When the two of you made it into the dark and empty hallway, you decided to say something.  

“You didn’t have to save me from my parents you know.  I could have handled it.”

Eric stilled his walking, his hand removed itself from your back as he turned you around to face him. “You’re kidding me right Y/N?  I watched you the whole time you interacted with your parents.  You weren’t going to stand up to them.  You were about to start crying again.”

His words felt like a slap to your face; your mouth hanging open as you scoffed at him.  “Well I’m so sorry to take up your time” you spat back sarcastically.  Eric lunged forward, backing you into a wall as his hands gripped your shoulders.  

“Do. Not. Temp. Me” he growled out; his animalistic tone sending shockwaves straight to your core. Without thinking, you leaned up on your tip toes and graced his lips with yours.  He stilled, not reacting to your kiss and you pulled away, feeling defeated.  

Eric glared down at you with narrow eyes and you couldn’t breathe.  You couldn’t bring yourself to tear your gaze away from him as he leaned down and captured your lips.  His fingers ran up your neck and into your hair as you bunched his shirt in your hands, pulling him closer.  His tongue swiped across your lower lip and you let out a moan; Eric chuckled quickly before darting his tongue into your mouth.  Your knees felt weak with desire as you clung to him, hoping to make it through this heated kiss without making a fool of yourself.  

Voices in the distant caused him to pull away hastily and you felt cold without his touch on you. He clasped his hand with yours and he walked you back to the dorms.  

~~~

Eric helped you improve with your fear landscapes over the next few weeks and you were able to finally overcome your worst fear with ease; your parents.  

When it came down to it, you aced your final initiation stage and came in 4th place. That night, you celebrated in the Pit with all the other initiates who passed also.  It felt like a whirlwind these last few weeks and you were happy it was all over; happy you didn’t become factionless and happy to hopefully move forward with Eric.  The two of you didn’t share any more intimate moments because there was a strict rule about initiates engaging with Dauntless members, let alone leaders.  

As you danced and drank your night away you felt a pair of strong arms wrap around you from behind. In the past, this situation would have caused you to jump in fear; but not anymore.  You were Dauntless now and you could control your fears.  

“I’m proud of you” Eric husked into your ear as his warmth flooded your back.  A smirk appeared on your face as you turned around, wrapping your own hands around his neck.  

“Are you?” you asked in question; your brows raised high.  “Then lets go celebrate properly.”

Eric’s eyes turned dark as he took in your words.  Quickly, he gripped your hand in his and he led you away from the Pit.  You walked behind Eric as he continued to wind his way around the never ending dark hallways.  Your eyes searching your surroundings, you realized you had never been in this area before and you guess he was taking you back to his apartment.

He stopped in front of a door and quickly unlocked it, pulling you inside.  The second he shut the door he pushed you up against it; his lips crushing against yours.  You moaned loudly as you felt his tongue inside your mouth; your clit starting to ache in need for his touch.  

“Are you a virgin?” he rasped out as his lips assaulted your neck.  

“No” came your quick reply.

“Good because you’re all I’ve wanted since the first time we’ve kissed” he said as he suckled on your neck, hitting your sweet spot just above your collar bone as you sighed in content. “I’m lost without you Y/N” he confessed as he pulled away to look into your eyes.  “You’re all I can think about when I’m not with you, and when I am with you, all I want to do is rip your clothes off and have my way with you.”

His words jumbled in your mind as you quickly processed what he was saying.  “Then what’s taking you so long” you quipped back, just wanting his hands back on your body; just wanting him to please you.  

Eric growled out as he bent down to pick you up, your legs wrapped around his torso as you felt his erect member push at your core.  He carried you to his bedroom before dropping you onto his bed.  

Eric started to strip himself of his clothing as you did the same.  He crawled up on the bed towards you as his hand snaked up your leg.  You shivered at his touch as his hand finally cupped your sex.  Your head fell back onto the pillow as you gasped in surprise.

“Mmmmm so wet” he groaned as he rubbed sensual circles around your clit with his thumb, his middle finger plunging straight into your core.  He worked you relentlessly and with fervor; your high quickly building up deep inside of you.  

Eric lowered his mouth and attached to your clit causing you to cry out in pleasure.  His tongue swirled around your nub as he continued to pump his fingers inside you.  Your hands fisted in your hair as your breathing became shallow; your moans filling the room.  He hummed over your throbbing clit and that alone made you fall over the edge; tumbling into a pleasurable orgasm.  

He didn’t give you any time to come down from your high before he flipped you over; your ass hanging in the air for him to see.  “Are you on the shot?” he demanded while his hands massaged your ass.  

“Yes” you breathed out as you tried to catch your breath.  In an instant, Eric’s cock submerged into your core as you cried out again.  His hands on your hip gripped with such force you, for once, were happy to see the bruises there tomorrow.  

His hips thrust into you from behind with force you had never felt and you had to use your newly defined arm muscles to hold you in place.  “Fuck you feel so good around my cock” Eric groaned out as he continued his thrusts.  “So warm and tight.”

You pushed back, meeting his thrusts as you felt the coil start to tighten again in your belly. Eric felt your inner walls start to tighten around him as his hand came forward and played with your sensitive clit.

“FUCK ERIC!!!!” you screamed as your orgasm ripped through your body for the second time that night. The oxygen was taken from your lungs as Eric’s movements continued to aid your high.  

His hips started to slow and you caught your breath before he pulled you back; flush against him. You felt his warm seed coat your walls as his cock pulsated inside you.  “You’re mine” he demanded and you nodded at his words.  

“Yes….yours Eric.  Only…yours” you staggered out; oxygen still fighting its way to your lungs.  He pulled out of you and you felt his seed dribble down your legs as you collapsed onto the bed.  Eric laid down next to you, pulling you into him as he nuzzled your neck.  

For the first time in your life, you felt wanted, loved, protected.  That was the first night you slept without any disruptions from nightmares or memories from your past.

Tag List: @kanupps06 @potterhead1265 @miss-cap21 @pumbibaby @the-real-kellymonster @princess-evans-addict @mustbenot @remember-that-one-blog @projectxhappiness @libbitinasdeath

[myriadimagines]

Preference: Marvel (X-Men)

Finding Out You Love Them

Characters: Alex Summers, Charles Xavier, Erik Lensherr, Hank McCoy & Raven Darkholme

Warnings: mentions of death

Request: “Hey could I please have an xmen first class preference where the characters find out you love them? For charles, erik, hank, alex and mystique please x” - anonymous

A/N: hope you like it !!

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Alex Summers [x]

“Come on, y/n.” Raven nudged you teasingly. “It’s so obvious how hard you’re crushing on him. Just ask him out!”

“Shh, Raven!” you giggled, nudging her back. “He’ll hear!”

The two of you were sitting out in the garden, casually chatting. Between all the training that was going on, you barely had any time to just sit and talk to your best friend. Somehow, the conversation had turned onto the topic of your crush on Alex, despite how hard you were trying to hide it.

Coincidentally, Alex strolled by and into the lounge room to grab himself a drink. He saw you and Raven sitting outside, laughing between yourselves. He smiled to himself as he couldn’t help but continue gazing at you – Alex had a huge crush on you ever since Charles has recruited you, but he didn’t have the courage to talk to you. 

“I swear he’s in love with you too,” Raven continued, the both of you unaware of Alex. “I’m willing to bet that he’ll say yes if you ask him out.”

“No he won’t!” you protested, and Alex frowned as he couldn’t help but eavesdrop into your conversation. What were the two of you talking about? 

“Well, we should find him right now and find out.” Raven got to her feet, and you desperately grabbed her arm and tried to stop her. “Come on, y/n, let’s find the love of your life.” 

The love of your life? Alex couldn’t help but feel a swell of jealousy in his chest. He had no idea you were crushing on someone. He doubted it was him. Maybe you had a crush on Hank, or even Charles or Erik. He was about to leave when he heard the rest of your conversation.

“Please don’t, Raven.” you begged, and she rolled her eyes.

“If Alex seriously doesn’t like you back, y/n, he obviously doesn’t deserve you. You will literally be the best thing that’s going to happen in his life.” Raven exclaimed loudly as she threw her hands up into the hair, and you were about to shush her when you saw Alex standing behind her. Alex’s eyes widened, and you began blushing furiously. Confused, Raven turned around, and stifled a laugh when she saw Alex.

“H-hi, Alex.” you managed to choke out, and Alex quickly composed himself.

“Hey, y/n.” Alex stammered, taking a step towards you. He glanced at Raven, who gave him an expectant look, and he cleared his throat before saying the words he never thought he’d have the courage to say. “Um, Raven’s right. I-I am in love with you.”

Charles Xavier [x]

You had been best friends with Charles for as long as you could remember. The two of you had met as children, the both of you discovering you had the same mutation as him. The both of you could read minds, including each others, unless you purposely focused on blocking your thoughts from being read. Not like you had to block your thoughts from each other – the two of you trusted each other and didn’t have any secrets.

Except for one thing: you were in love with Charles.

Every time you were around him, you couldn’t help but feel a flutter in your chest. The way he smiled at you, casually touched you or praised you in any way made you feel insanely happy.

The two of you were out in the garden in front of the mansion, just quietly enjoying the scenery and the warmth from the sun. You leaned back on the blanket Charles had lay out for the two of you to sit on, squinting in the sunlight. 

“It’s beautiful.” you thought, and Charles smiled as he watched you. He loved the way you looked when you were fascinated by something.

“Not as beautiful as you.” Charles thought, and you rolled your eyes at him as he chuckled.

“God, you’re cheesy.” you replied in your head. “I don’t know why I’m in love with you.”

Your eyes widened when you realised you hadn’t blocked out your last thought from Charles, and a smile spread across his face. 

“Oh, no.” you muttered, sitting up. You were about to rush off, embarrassed, when Charles quickly reached out to grab your hand to stop you. He edged closer to you, his hand still lingering on yours.

“There’s no need to be worried, y/n.” Charles reassured you, and you slowly looked up at him. Taking in a deep breath, he confessed, “I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember. I’m glad you feel the same.”

He gave you a small smile, and you smiled back. Before you could reply, Charles leaned forward, pressing his lips against yours. You didn’t think that this was how the afternoon was going to go, but you weren’t about to complain.

Erik Lensherr [x]

“I can not believe you, Erik!” you exclaimed, slamming the door behind you. You were just with Erik, Hank, Charles and Logan, trying to find Raven. Next thing you knew, Erik attempted to kill Raven. Logan seemed to forget what was happening, leaving it up to you and Hank to stop Erik while Charles stayed with Logan. The whole situation was falling apart, and Erik had managed to escape from Hank. You had gone after him, and now the two of you were hiding in a hotel room. 

“y/n…” Erik tried to explain, but you waved your hand to cut him off.

“No.” you snapped, and Erik sighed. “There is no excuses. You tried to kill her, Erik! That’s not what our plan is!”

“I am trying to protect us all!” Erik yelled back, taking a step towards you. Everything metal in the room shifted, but you were not intimidated. You stepped closer to him, full of anger.

“Charles seems to think there is no longer any good in you.” you growled, balling your hands into fists. “No one seems to believe there’s any good in you. But I do, Erik, but you’re making it very hard to keep believing that deep down, you’re a good person.”

“Maybe I’m not!” Erik exclaimed, and you shook your head. “Maybe I’m not the person you want me to be!” 

“Stop it,” you shook your head, backing away, but Erik stepped closer. “Stop it!”

“I am doing what I think is right.” Erik continued, backing you against a wall. “And if you won’t support me in doing so, then you should leave.”

“I am not leaving you.” you replied, and Erik raised his eyebrows. 

“No one’s forcing you to stay.” he leaned closer, his voice level. 

“Well, I’m not leaving because I love you, Erik.” you finally blurted, exasperated. You gulped as Erik stared at you, shocked, before taking a step back and looking away. “Can’t you see that?”

Erik finally looked up at you, a pained expression on his face. You bit your lip, fearing the worst.

“I’m no good for you, y/n.” he croaked out, and you tilted your head. “I’ll hurt you. I’m already hurting you now.”

“Oh, Erik.” you sighed, stepping closer to him and caressing his cheek. “You don’t have the power to hurt me.”

He chuckled, a small smile appearing on his face. You smiled back, lifting his chin up so his eyes locked with yours. 

“We can make this work, Erik.” you insisted. “But only if you’re willing.”

He finally lifted his hands up, gently holding your face. As he kissed your forehead, he whispered, “Okay.”

Hank McCoy[x]

“Dear Hank,”

You sighed as you rested your chin in your hands, wondering what to write. You didn’t even know if this was a good idea, writing a letter to Hank, confessing your crush. You were pretty sure Hank had already gone home, and you about too, but needed to write this letter. Pressing your lips together, you knew there was no other way you were going to admit it – you were too shy to say it out loud.

“We’ve been working together in the lab for a while now, and we’ve become close friends. I’ve always thought that was it, but I’m beginning to realise I think I am in love with you.”

You laughed to yourself at how cheesy you sounded, but it was true. You and Hank were practically at each other’s sides, 24/7, working on something scientific. Lab work could be quite boring at times, but Hank always seemed to make everything worth it. He was always cracking dorky jokes to make you smile, or doing extra work so you could finish up early to go home. He was such a sweet guy, no wonder you were in love with him.

“I don’t know if you feel the same way, but I just had to let you know. If you don’t feel the same way about me, I hope it doesn’t affect our friendship.”

Taking a deep breath, you reread the letter before quickly signing it off.

“From, Sincerely, Your lab buddy, y/n.”

You folded the letter, writing Hank’s name on the side, and placed it on Hank’s desk. You were about to leave the room when you groaned loudly and turned around, snatching the letter up and tossing it into the trash instead. You were too scared of Hank’s reaction, and you were pretty sure he had a crush on Raven instead.

You grabbed your stuff and left the lab, not knowing that Hank had just entered from another door. He was just outside talking to Charles, and began to clear his desk before getting ready to leave. He dumped some things into the trash, and his eyes widened when he saw a piece of paper with his name on it. Gingerly reaching inside, he unfolded the paper and began to read. 

A few minutes later, you rushed back into the room, having forgotten your coat. You gasped when you saw Hank, not expecting him to be inside, before giving him a friendly smile. Your smile quickly faded when you recognised a familiar piece of paper in Hank’s hands, which he quickly hid behind his back.

“Oh, Hank…” you stammered. “Y-you weren’t supposed to read that…”

“I-I didn’t know you were in love with me.” he quickly said, and you blushed. “I, uh, I’m actually in love with you too.”

Your eyes widened as Hank began to blush too, before you breathed a huge sigh of relief. Hank laughed before strolling over to you, nervously rubbing the back of his head.

“I was about to head out and grab some dinner.” Hank put his hands into his pockets. “Do you… want to go with me?”

Smiling, you looped your arm through his. “I’d love that.”

Raven Darkholme [x]

“So how long have you and y/n been dating?” Charles casually asked Raven, and her head snapped up upon hearing your name. 

“What are you talking about?” Raven asked, and Charles raised an eyebrow. 

“Aren’t the two of you…” Charles trailed off, and Raven shot him a look as Charles’ eyes widened upon realising what he had just done. Quickly looking away, be quickly busied himself with some books and papers on his desk. Raven slammed her hands on his desk, and Charles timidly looked up.

“Why do you think y/n and I are dating?” Raven asked, and Charles seemed to shrink into his chair.

“No reason.” he said quickly, and Raven raised her eyebrows. Charles pressed his lips together as Raven stared at him, before straightening and spinning on her heel to leave. Charles scrambled to his feet and called out after her, “Where are you going?”

“To find y/n.” she replied simply. “And ask them why you think we’re dating.”

“No!” Charles exclaimed, rushing in front of Raven and slamming the door. “I-I may have accidentally read their mind.”

“And?” Raven asked impatiently, and Charles sighed.

“You cannot tell y/n, okay? They’d be furious if they found out I read their mind.” Charles pointed a finger at Raven, and she nodded before waving her hands.

“Yeah, yeah,” she rolled her eyes. “Come on, spit it out.”

“I heard them thinking about how in love with you they were.” Charles finally blurted, and Raven stared at Charles in surprise before a small smile appeared on her lips. She laughed lightly to herself as Charles tried to gauge her reaction.

“y/n’s in love with me.” Raven said quietly to herself, before looking up. She pushed past Charles and opened the door, and Charles rushed after her in alarm.

“What are you doing now?” Charles asked, and Raven pushed him away.

“I’m still going to find y/n.” Raven shrugged, and Charles groaned. “And I’m going to ask them out. Thanks for your help, Charles!” 

Charles finally stopped chasing after her, but couldn’t help but smile at the thought that he had brought his two favorite mutants together.

[gravelgirty]

Transgender: Noun or Adjective

Answer: Adjective.

Always.

English language sucks at times, which is why I’m terrified of learning another language. I make enough mistakes with the one I was born into.

When I posted an awareness alert for Jade Logue, I made a huge mistake in using the word ‘transgender’ as a noun and not an adjective. I based this use on the following (here’s where I prove ignorance is not just skin deep--it goes all the way down to the bone and passes on in the DNA):

1) I have a child who has personally ID’d as transgender this year, and they and the entire peer group use transgender as a noun, as well as an adjective, and a self-label. So the being comfortable (let’s say relieved) as discovering the word ‘transgender’ and connecting it to “I am” is still an amazing achievement.  We weren’t looking past that. When a friend of mine says, “I’m FN” (First Nations, i.e., Native American, I’d think its the same thing as saying “I’m white” and it wouldn’t occur to me that that is different from saying “a transgender”.

2) While I’ve read the flyers on from the therapist I was never given a list of YES/NO or DOs/DON’TS for transgender issues. That would have been really helpful. I mean, really.  I found articles online, but it was hit or miss.

3) Several of the blogs I have read (mostly from people IN MY AGE GROUP (saying this in caps to make a point) use transgender as a noun, or as a vague definitive. The best example I can give to this is an elder in our family laughing in amused contempt because the younger people are scolding him for saying “colored” instead of “black”. Huge difference there--but if you won’t see it, you can’t. Neither side gained a thing that day.

4) I am from a region where many of the people who are screaming at me would facetiously label as ‘ignorant’ and nouns, adjectives, and verbs are in a blurrier world than yours obviously is. That’s not an excuse--but when you grow up being told that your outdated dialect is a source of shame it doesn’t help when someone jumps on you, especially when you post as Anonymous. Transgender as a noun is on its way out--and from what I am understanding here, that is a good thing--but I’m worried at the anger at all these people yelling and screaming at me. Are you doing the same thing to my child’s support group? Of all the screaming, only 1% contacted me with your identity intact, and of that, only 1 was polite enough that I felt like I could respond and be listened to. I wanted to learn something out of this. And really, the things you’re yelling, I can too easily see getting thrown at children like the ones in my world. Children who are struggling with not just who they are, but struggling with language. My kid has a language disability. A very, very common one: An improperly diagnosed eye Rx an make total mincemeat on language comprehension, and it missed all the proper tests for all their life except for about 4 months ago. So. While this family has seen constant language corrections as a matter of course, no one has ever corrected us on noun or adjective use for the word transgender. And half of our family includes schoolteachers. My other child is a Youth Group volunteer and this issue never came up in his training on sensitivity and awareness. He’s in his senior year of graduation--no one in his world has ever raised the issue of transgender -as-noun-or-gender. I asked him before I wrote this, just to make sure I wasn’t oblivious to his world. I sign petitions, urge equality and post a rainbow flag. I was adopted by an Orisha who changes sex. So, yeah, I thought I was sensitive. You can bask in the glow coming off my face--I’ve done the same to people I’ve gleefully corrected on other issues.

In short, I’m only now just seeing how flipping BROKEN this country is in supporting not just the LGBTQ communities. I see it takes more than therapists, trained physicians, GPs, pediatricians, social workers and fairy godmothers to effect positive change.  It takes the “Second family”, “family of choice” and social groups to create the REAL positive change in fixing this.  There is no real diversity in this world unless we actually see where the line is drawn in our comfort zone. In this matter, I tripped and fell over it.

I am grateful to be corrected, because I can be defensively angry at being caught out at being wrong (or ignorant, which feels worse), or I can take that as an extra reason to not forget this mistake. Stupidity should be painful--I’ve said that often enough that I’d be a hypocrite not to take it. But I’m asking you, please don’t lash out at children who make the same mistake. Just DON’T. I made that blog entry because I was scared for a child who is the same age as mine. I was ignorant, but I was also responding to empathy. And I’m a once-suicidal, depressed child who became a parent--I know how easily children are alienated, and the people who are encouraging a runaway to stay a runaway instead of finding a place of real safety is part of the population that makes it so, so much easier for predators to do as they please. I was not passing judgment--I was asking that a missing child be found--that meant found in a place of safety, and with legal resources, not under a lake or landfill. I don’t support people who want missing children to stay missing. 

Yell at me all you want--but if you’re sharing that post do it because you share in the concerns for this child. Don’t share it to prove me or her parents as bad people, don’t project. Please. And remember, the 1 person that got me to see things as they really were. If I was a child that would have been devastating.

[hero-of-burning-courage-blog]

Some personal shit to be ranted about below. This is just me venting into the void.

So for those of you who don’t know, I was physically abused and psychologically tortured by my older half brother within my memory span from ages 3 to 16 (which was when he was kicked out of the house). This happened behind closed doors when we were supposed to be playing when dad (our shared parent) was off to work, and my mom was busy doing things around the house. He would vent his anger and frustrations out on me. He’d hit me in places that would be covered by my clothes until it bruised and I was crying, but I wouldn’t be allowed to make a noise. I quickly learned to adapt to pain and pretend everything was okay, otherwise, he’d kill everyone I loved before he would kill me. Now, he was only 2 years older than me, but as a child, I couldn’t rationalise that he couldn’t do that to my parents just yet. How could I? I was 3 when it started. 

I hated summer time because it meant he’d be living with us instead of his mother.

When he turned 8, my parents gained full custody over him, and I cried myself to sleep every night, silently... but I had already been trained to not show it outside of my locked room at night, and I was only 6. A 6-year-old shouldn’t have to worry about their parents knowing they are in pain or scared for their own life. A 6-year-old should be playing, and be okay with telling their parents anything... but how could I? He’d kill everyone I loved before he’d finally kill me.

By no means were my parents perfect. They had their flaws. They could be emotionally and mentally abusive at times. It definitely got worse as I developed my own sense of self. Now I’m an adult, and I’m no longer their little girl... I’m a grown man, and they seem to hate that, but won’t say it anymore.

To them, family must always be forgiven, no matter how egregious the actions of a member... even if said actions were directed at another family member. You must do all you can to paint the picture of a happy family, despite how broken you are on the inside... despite how broken another family member made you.

I kept my mouth shut until November of 2015. I had just turned 21 the month prior to finally telling my parents why I hated my older half brother so much. It took me 5 years to summon the courage to say something about all the horrible things that had happened. To be brave enough to go against what I had been tortured into believing for so long... to know that he couldn’t kill everyone I loved before he’d finally kill me. 

As I write this, I’m biting back tears. I shake with fear that somehow he’d know it was me writing this, that he’d make good on his promise, but I need this to be known... because after this horrible secret being spilled to my parents (and he most certainly knows because they confronted him)... not even 2 years after the truth being known, my dad invites him over to my younger brother’s graduation party, and he sneaks up behind me to say hello. I knew he was coming and was already orchestrating how to leave with Kara and Tyler before he showed up, but he was early. I fled to my room and locked the door. I was having an anxiety attack. 

My other younger brother (have 3 of them), was the first to notice I wasn’t upstairs for the party. He was sent to ask me if the peach cobbler I was making was finished, or if the collard greens were done. I had finished both just as my abuser had surprised me. I regrettably snapped at Kevin (the one who noticed I wasn’t around) when he couldn’t hear me and knocked hard on my door and tried to open it and found it to be locked. I apologised later for that... 

My mother was next. She called my phone to ask me where I was and if all the food was done. I told her I was in my room, trying not to panic (despite already panicking), and that my friend Tyler was on his was to pick me up and take me somewhere safe. She didn’t protest this, accepted it, but informed my dad... who was not okay with this.

My father came down and didn't’ say anything before trying to force my door open, causing me to panic more. How could I not know that it was my abuser? I cleared my throat to make myself sound okay and tentatively responded, asking who was there. Dad said it was him and demanded I open my door. I did as I was asked and he forced his way into my room... only to yell at and reprimand me for wanting to leave and for panicking. He berated me and tried to humiliate me for being scared. He tried to invalidate my gender identity, because years of torture left me frightened and crying... and real men wouldn’t let something like that get to them. Mind you, my father has been to war and also has PTSD. He can’t get in his vehicle without checking under it to make sure no bombs were planted there. Guess he’s not a real man either, based on his shitty definition of a real man -queue eye roll here-

After seeing that he “couldn’t get through to me” by yelling and humiliating me and making me panic more, after an awkward silence for a good 5 to 10 minutes, he quietly asked me what I would like him to do, I responded barely above a whisper, “I’d like for you to get out of my room please.” And this pissed him off further. He called me a selfish asshole and “That’s what you’re going to say to me?!” Then got up and slammed my bedroom door on his way out. I cried and waited for all to go quiet before I fled. My shoes had been hidden, but I found my flip flops, ignoring my strict rule of no socks and sandals, put those on, and proceeded to leave. My mom saw me head out and caught me just as I got to the sidewalk in front of our yard. She asked me where I was going, I told her I was going to the park and Tyler would be picking me up soon. She asked if I’d be home that night, and I said I wasn’t sure, but dad was pissed off and probably didn’t want me home anyways, and I definitely wouldn’t return until my abuser was gone. She let me go without further protest.

My calves burned as I rushed to the park, only to then decide to go further, walking all the way to the high school in my neighbourhood. The walk helped my nerves, but only enough to calm me from my anxiety attack. I was still a paranoid wreck, trying hard to not dissociate. Tyler texted that he was 5 minutes away. That was the longest 5 minutes of my life. I jumped at every sound that wasn’t a bird, kept scanning around and stayed hidden until Tyler’s car showed up. I was safe. 

The car ride was mostly silence, with the dull hum of the radio. Tyler kept changing the station, but I mostly couldn’t pay attention to what was on. I could barely focus on his words whenever he spoke. I was safe, but I was still scared. There were several times where I wanted to grab his hand as an anchor, but he was driving, and I dunno if that’d be awkward or give the wrong idea, so I kept my hands to myself. 

We made it to a mutual friend’s house, spent the evening with a handful of friends who were aware of the situation, they helped me calm down and get my mind off things. I tried hard to focus on what we were doing, my mind drifting every so often, but someone always managed to pull my attention back to reality and away from all the what ifs and paranoid thoughts of the future when I’d have to return home. 

I then received a text towards the later hours of the evening that my abuser might be staying the night in my home. Cass, Adam, and Derek offered to let me stay at their house for the evening, and I definitely stayed. My abuser didn’t leave my house until almost 1 in the morning. Mom asked me if I was coming home, and I told her that everyone already left or went to bed, so I’d be back in the morning.

I did return the next morning, having barely slept and was plagued with night terrors, only to receive a cold shoulder from my dad... which I suppose was better than him deciding to yell at me more. I have been bouncing between apathetic and on the verge of tears since that happened... which was just this past Memorial Day weekend. Dad has barely spoken more than a couple sentences to me since it happened. 

I’ve been depressed since then... nerves on edge because now my abuser knows exactly where to find me. I’m hoping to be gone to finish school by next spring, but that feels ages away and it makes me sick thinking about having to wait that long. I feel like I won’t be able to truly get better until I have my own place away from here, a place that my abuser has no knowledge of. Rent is too expensive in Colorado to find my own place now, especially since I’m trying to save my money to move up to Minnesota to finish school. 

I have had the impulsive thought to shave my head, change my glasses, put a rush on my top surgery, pick a different name despite how much I love my name now, and move to a different state now... but I don’t have enough to do that. I like my hair and glass and name... I don’t even know where I’d go right now... so I’m stuck. I work 45~ hours a week as a baker, and I’m stuck right now. I’d pick up on commissions for extra cash, but I don’t even have enough of a following for anyone to care enough to pay me. I’m shit at advertising myself on social media. I’m barely capable of running an RP blog. I’m hardly active on Facebook. I go generally unnoticed. Sometimes I prefer to be that anonymous despite my wildly coloured hair and spunky personality (when I’m not feeling like utter shit)... I dunno... I’m working hard now, and I’ll get there. I gotta work on my portfolio to get into the school I’m planning on anyways. I may open up commissions when I’m feeling less frazzled and ready to bolt at the mildest sign of danger.

I’d like to thank my friends Kara, Tyler, Cass, Adam, Derek, and Nate (who was the only unmentioned friend in this, lmao, despite his humour helping me along too) for being there. I’d probably be in a lot worse of a state of mind if y’all didn’t kidnap me. I’d also like to thank my online friends Yuki, Psyco, and Inu for keeping me calm through that anxiety attack while I waited for Tyler to come get me. 

I will be okay, I just need time to recover. It’s been one thing after another lately, but I feel like things will get better soon, at least for now.

He can’t kill everyone I love and then me, because he doesn’t live in this town, and my family now knows, and so do you, dear readers. I have survived this long, and will continue to do so for many years, because his threats were probably empty. I am stronger than my mental illness. I am stronger than the torture he put me through. I may hate him for all the horrible things he did to me and my family, he may terrify me still, but I am stronger than him.

I am stronger than him.