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#a burden is lifted
myheartxmyman · 1 month
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But somewhere over the last year I lost you, the person I still love deeply. Whoever you are now is someone else. I tried to reach you, find you again, but who you are now who you became I don't even consider as a friend.
#you got lost on the way#strange things can happen#when thinking about all the things that went wrong and all the hurt you caused it makes me think I might have loved a phantom#at the end of February you had already changed a lot#people can keep up with a wrong version of themselves for approximately two to three months#is that the explanation?#and still here I am dancing with your ghost#still you're not a hundred percent gone#there is still a tiny silly hope#but with some time I'll set myself free#even if it all was true the colors you showed me in the end didn't align with mine#you're satisfied with YOUR life#there was never room for OURs#feels like I was supposed to just fit in in yours#I mean if I would have gotten pregnant what did you expect?#a pregnant girlfriend who's supposed to give birth between two flats?#wouldn't have worked out like that#at least not for me#but that's what I mean by saying 'you are completely satisfied with YOUR life#feels like we never had a true chance because we never grew together#at least not in enough ways#we never formed our own home#maybe that's why we never got our little Braten#I miss what we had#I am in deep pain and at the same time kinda relieved#it's strange on one hand I feel like all our the troubles this relationship caused all the pain of losing my man in the end makes it hard to#breath and swallow#at the other hand I can breathe in way deeper than I could those last nine/ten months#a burden is lifted#the heart aches nevertheless
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every day someone on this app says joel took away ellie’s agency and every day i wanna scream about it WE SHOULDNT ACTUALLY, IN FACT, LET TRAUMATISED FOURTEEN YEAR OLD GIRLS SACRIFICE THEMSELVES WHEN THE REASON THEYRE SO READY TO DIE IS INTRINSICALLY LINKED TO THAT TRAUMA! and actually the fact that the fireflies were so ready to exploit that trauma and use it to justify killing her (i.e. marlene saying she’d want this as tho that would negate the horror of what she was doing) has more to do with ellie’s agency than anything else lmao
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people will fr hype up jason as nico's number one ally and confidant meanwhile reyna saw his worst feelings, witnessed him kill a man and supported him even more afterwards. wlw & mlm solidarity wins!
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bby-deerling · 5 months
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breathe (zoro x reader)
a bit of a heavy drabble i've been going through it lately, please heed the content warnings <3
cw: established relationship, hurt/comfort, angst, reader has ptsd, implied history of past sexual trauma (reader), night terrors, dissociation, depersonalization, derealization, zoro is doing his best (it's more than enough <3)
sfw but with some difficult/triggering topics, wc: 652 masterlist
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It’s difficult for Zoro to see you like this.
Tense, disoriented, and pulling away from his touch, his heart twists as you begin to emerge from a murky, hazy dream; less of a nightmare and more of a reliving of the horrors you’ve endured, the too familiar sensations of fear and panic embed their tendrils into your veins.  When the enemy is physical—able to be cut and able to bleed out—it’s much simpler for him to deal with; assessing the unseen threat, he cautiously remains still and observes.  He watches you carefully as something between a cry and a shout escapes your lips, and you violently jerk away from him, still dazed, half-asleep, and unable to differentiate him from the monster from so long ago lurking in the foreground of your mind.
“’S just me—it‘s me, Zoro.” he mumbles softly, running his thumb across your shoulder, grip around your waist loosened.  Breathing shaky and shallow, he gently turns you around to face him, allowing you to take the space you need from him, fighting his urge to smother you in his arms and protect you from your own mind.  Noticing your gaze is unfocused and staring off into nowhere in particular, he gently cups your cheeks and tilts your face upward towards his in an attempt to re-center you in reality.
“Zoro… just Zoro.” you mumble repeatedly under your breath like a mantra, trying to convince yourself it was true.  Eyes glazed over, lost in a limbo between the past and present, you were halfway in, halfway out, and unable to shake the feeling of the violation from your nightmare away—not when it felt like it was happening all over again.
He sighs in concern and threads his fingers through your hair as you suddenly bury your face into his chest, aching and shuddering sobs burrowing into his skin.  A familiar cycle begins; melting into his arms, you become nearly comfortable, limp, and relaxed enough to return to your slumber, until you suddenly shoot your head up to look for his face, desperately searching for confirmation that it was still him holding you—his heart nearly breaks at the dull emptiness in your eyes, the light behind your stare lost, confused and broken.
Laying down on his side, he gently nudges you to encourage you to do the same and face him.  Calloused fingers stroke your cheek, and a wide, rough hand runs in a slow, soothing path up and down your arm, providing you the comfort and contact you craved while still being able to see his face.  “’S alright, you’re safe.  You’re with me.” he murmurs, pressing soft kisses to your forehead, slowly turning your weak and hollow sighs into hums of contentment, and your sounds eventually ebb entirely into deep breaths as sleep finds you once more.
There is no string of magic, comforting phrases or platitudes he can stumble across and repeat to take your pain away—if there was, he knew he was wholly unequipped to recite them, and that you would be too stubborn and resistant to believe them.  Attempts to soothe you verbally fade into nearly meaningless words, especially in a state like this, when your ability to comprehend is clouded by a dense, dark fog smothering your senses.  Soft, non-constricting touches, as gentle as he’s capable of giving, and simple reassurances are what you need—he's what you need in these moments of weakness.
Zoro presses one last kiss to your forehead and releases the breath he hadn’t realized he was holding as he watches your sleeping form, tension and agony removed from your countenance. 
Peaceful—your face now radiates with serenity and sweetness, a far cry from the twisted, uncomfortable expression plaguing your features while writhing in panic during your nightmare.
Relieved at the sight, he hopes your dreams are now as saccharine as the look on your face.
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solar-sunnyside-up · 10 months
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I was thinking about this again but,, so in the 1980s the estimate was by the 2000s automaton would ensure that ppl would only need to work 3 days a week.
Can you imagine? Just for a moment. Only working on your weekends??
Defining our weekends not by the escapism of work for a few hours ofnrest and socialization. But rather those are the times in which you put effort into something?
Like working a coffee shop or in fast food or retail? Working for 3 days on some project and or fixing a minor bug to pass off to someone else. Check on a garden. Editing movies. Whatever you call work. But that's the weekend, rest of the time is yours.
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randomfandomss · 1 year
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He has become soo...soft *gently holds*
😭😭💛💛💛😭😭😭😭🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈✨️✨️✨️
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420technoblazeit · 11 days
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HOLY FUCKIGN SHIT I DIDNT FAIL MY STATISTICS COURSE. I COULD CRY TEARS OF JOY RN I DOTN HAVE TO RETAKE THAT SHIT THAT'S THE LAST MATH COURSE I EVER HAVE TO TAKE LET'S GOOOOOOO
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angelsdean · 4 months
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Dean remembering Hell in Supernatural: Bobby Singer's Guide to Hunting.
(for context they're up against a Greek Goddess that is feeding on their memories--preferring the good ones--so Dean starts remembering all his worst ones to hurt her)
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ahappydnp · 5 months
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this is just me thinking but I feel like at this stage the fandoms own guilt over how many treated dnp for a long time is bigger than any feeling dnp themselves have about it. even if fans weren't directly part of it, I think a lot of us still carry that history of just how far off things went at certain times. I definitely think as hurt as especially Dan was, he's forgiven us, he's over it (man's had enough therapy) so now most of it comes from ourselves really.
oh for sure like we're all so traumatized from that shit and i think we're still beating ourselves up more than dan and phil ever would but also i don't expect them to ever explicitly say all is forgiven (and they shouldn't have to!) because it's one of those things we (as in us and dnp) don't have a dialogue about and that's okay. i do hope this new era eases some of the guilt though
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Huge shoutout to my mother for the questions she'd ask me when I was buying clothes as a child and teen:
"Can you sit down in those?"
"Can you raise your arms?"
"Can you bend over comfortably?"
Really helped me build the habit of evaluating whether an item of clothing is practical enough for my day-to-day life.
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ihavedonenothingright · 10 months
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kaseyskat · 9 months
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i wonder how darryl and henry reacted to the blue sky like… they’re both still in san dimas and alive presumably?
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gayvampyr · 1 year
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i used to be a bit of a know-it-all because i felt like i had to know everything and constantly prove my ~intelligence~ in order to be valuable but let me tell you how refreshing it is to be at a point where i can just say “i don’t know” and leave it at that. i love that phrase. “i don’t know”!
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empty-dream · 7 months
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Jujutsu Kaisen S2 (2023) || The Raid 2: Berandal (2014)
Choso vs Yuuji is actually inspired from The Raid 2: Berandal. Source: Jujutsu Kaisen Fanbook (TL by Kaikaikitan on Twitter)
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martyrbat · 6 months
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detective comics #509
[ID: Bruce Wayne sleeping in his penthouse, his eyes squeezed shut as the narration reads, ‘Gordon's strained laugh sounds hollow, but it echos in the Batman's mind... and haunts his dreams...” Bruce awakens to a hand on his shoulder and before he can think, he's twisting it and holding it down. The panel expands, revealing the hand belongs to Alfred as he's almost toppling over! He cries out, “M-master Bruce—my arm!” as Bruce groggily realizes who it is. He lets go at once as Alfred moves to the end of the bed and holds his arm while stammering an apology, “S-sorry, s-sir... Sorry if I startled you.” Bruce looks at him with aghast as he cries out, “My god, Alfred—I almost broke your arm!” Alfred reasons, “You must have been having a nightmare, sir.” as Bruce sits up and puts his face in his hands. He weepily dismisses, “A nightmare—what kind of an excuse is that? Old friend... forgive me...” Alfred reassures, “Nothing to forgive, sir. Just bad nerves, sir.” END ID]
#THIS ONE !!!!#bruce and his neverending guilt complex#just immediately regretful and so apologetic as alfred is quick to reassure and dismiss it#holding his arm because of fucking course it still hurts but when bruce lifts his head he stops ....#always thinking of how he was a caretaker for bruce since he was a small child/infant and how many little things bruce does now will remind#alfred of those days#he likes his grilled cheese q certain way. he cries if he thinks he hurt someone. he blames himself for a lot. he gets bad nightmares#like so much has stayed the same as so much continues to change but the love and care thry have for each other is always there#(<- guy who is always number one in bruce is disabled and needs a caretaker but also in how the people around him know bruce loves and cares#about them. its not about not being loved its about how heavy his love is and how bruce will subconsciously use his love to harm himself#(from blaming himself to his parents murders and jason's future death to something as simple as this and how he'll beat himself up#for hurting alfred and not able to protect him as well from himself)#(like his mental illness is forever using his stupid bleeding heart against himself as a reason for why hes awful)#this is all fully sidetracked im just fucking wired today sorry lol#but while im talking and something more related to the panel itself::#after this line bruce looks up and says ‘the batman suffering from bad nerves? lets hope not. gordon can worry about the election but i#cannot afford to. still its not just the campaign. lately so many other things are pressuring me—mostly as bruce wayne’#and like !!!!#it wasn't about batman! it wasnt about his burdens and responsibilities!! alfred was telling HIM. BRUCE. that its okay#and bruce automatically ‘its not because batman cant behave like this’ like !!!!#batman is the priority in the sense of he thinks he needs it to protect people. even his family even alfred and every single stranger#he won't ever allow himself any grace even while sleeping because batman cannot afford those ‘slips’#just GOD 70s/80s batman makes me insane for forever and ever amen#c: detective comics | i: 509#crypt's panels#bruce wayne#alfred pennyworth#alfred & bruce#‘awake or asleep—it scarcely matters anymore. the nightmare never seems to end.’#<- nightmare bruce tag <333
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robotsafari · 19 days
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a little peek into my twisted mind.
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