#a lot of choices for as to /why/

[thelonelyshore-if]

Morning! I read your Demo and very much enjoyed it. And hopefully I can say this in a positive way because it is positive! You actually do immutable story points pretty well! Its a difficult trick to pull off in IFs. Harder than I think most readers realize because the author is trying to tell a story but the readers want to feel like they can really interact with it too. The best example was the Doe Scene. MC was gonna end up getting their own place, the story demanded it (I assume), but resisting Doe allowed for some interesting and rewarding character building opportunities. So though one could argue in the end that the decision to make a deal with her was sort of moot it feels like it will pay off in the future how you handled it. I think the build up scene to the Car Ride in the Fog could use a little tweaking for MCs that believed them right off the bat (like if they believed them why bother trying to go on a car ride to escape? They are satisfied with the proof they've seen so far.) But the rest was handled very well as well and how an inevitable conclusion is handled by the MC continues to build their character.

Sorry for the wall of text but Thank You for sharing your fascinating story and I look forward to more.

Thank you so much for the message!

This is very comforting to read, in all honesty. The balance between player choice and plot is one I'm still trying to really feel out. I want players to feel like they get to decide where the story goes and what their character does--it's interactive fiction, after all. But at the same time, the plot does have to plot.

Like you suspected, the house is plot-relevant. I needed to get the MC there, one way or another. I'm glad the Doe scene worked for you! I'm quite proud of it. I really wanted to try and build a scenario where the player still feels like they have some control, even if the outcome is 'set'. Whether that be negotiating the deal or refusing and having ~something happen~

I also agree with the build up to the car ride, ngl. It's one of those things that is on my list for either my 'second draft' of the story, or for revisiting if the mood ever strikes to clean up some of the earlier parts. I don't want to rewrite before the story is finished, but that entire scene could really be improved by going at it with believer MCs a little more in mind.

At the end of the day I know that it's impossible to make everything work for every reader. There will be portions of the story that just...have to happen, and it really made me smile that you think I've done the majority of them well!

I'm trying, haha.

[heartorbit]

figure skating set right now please. thanks

[stompandhollar]

reminding everyone that the in-universe problem with The Doctor and The Master isn’t “ooo horrible nasty enemies who hate each other and don’t get along and fight all the time but are also in love”

the problem is that they get along. the problem is that they can’t stop themselves from falling naturally into a rhythm of riffing off one another and enjoying the other’s company. THAT is the problem. the problem is that it works and that’s the thing that caused all their issues. they like one another. they just click.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

The Charcuterie Board, as designed by your votes! Thank you to everyone who participated; this was a fun challenge!

[choccy-milky]

⭐ HL x animal crossing ⭐

something for fun bc why not......i have free will their personality types?? maybe?? : seb = smug clora = peppy poppy = normal/sweet imelda = snooty ominis = lazy (or cranky tbh) leander = jock natty = sisterly

[swiggity-swexual-i-am-asexual]

As per usual, it’s DP crossover with (probably) DC, although you could probably adjust it for other fandoms

ANYWAYS

A little kid and his mother are trick or treating in another city, perhaps at some kind of event rather than knocking on doors, and the kid is dressed as Phantom. It’s very adorable, with his little ghost-shaped bucket and clearly homemade and already stained costume—listen, white only works if you can just fly over street grime or phase it out of your clothes—and his slightly I’ll fitting wig. The kid is SO happy to be out and about dressed as his favorite, and maybe even showed it off to Phantom back in Amity Park before his family left.

The hero, insert whoever you wish here, is probably in civvies and just enjoying the event. The kid, meanwhile, is so glad when people ask who he is so he can explain, and so- the hero gets to hear ALL ABOUT the local town hero who is probably pretty small time despite the kid’s clearly exaggerated stories. The hero certainly never heard of him, but the kid’s mom confirms that Phantom really was the town hero, despite some mixed reviews of the poor guy.

“Did you manage to show him your costume?” the hero asks.

“Yeah! We went down to the cemetery to leave flowers and I got to show him my costume.”

Wait. Cemetery? Maybe it was part of theme, because Phantom had to be named that for a reason, but… it sounded like…

The kid ignores the suddenly VERY still hero and instead turns to his mom. “Momma, do you think we should bring him candy? He doesn’t get to trick or treat like we do, and I can work super hard to get him a bunch!”

The kid’s mom just smiles. “We could, but maybe we should bring him something homemade. I bet he’d like something more filling, teen boys like him have a hollow leg.”

The kid wrinkles his nose. “Like Vernie with the pizza bagels?”

“Like your cousin, yes. We can make some cinnamon rolls and take them to his memorial, maybe bring some of the apples from your grandpa’s garden…”

The hero is pretty much forgotten as the two-part family wanders off, not quite intentionally forgetting the hero is there so much as the hero somewhat accidentally ended the conversation when they just froze and didn’t ask anything further.

Not that the hero didn’t want to. But they’d learn something very serious.

One—there was a small town hero they’d never heard of. Two—that hero was apparently a teen. Third—most pressingly, the teen hero was both beloved enough to have kids dressing up as him and dead enough to have a grave.

This… might require some phone calls.

[ruby-red-inky-blue]

also another reason I don't like the take of Cassian being a messenger is that. I just can't help but feel like after they already replaced his previously established backstory with Jyn's almost beat for beat, they're now also thematically superimposing Andor!Cassian over yet another unfairly overlooked Rogue One character:

Get your mitts off my boy, Gilroy! Do not take one of the most poignant acts of bravery on Star Wars and recycle it for the laziest chosen one story of the last decade. What is this. Why are we turning Cassian into the 3-in-1 shampoo of Rogue One characters.

[peace-hunter]

if orion had died immediately after getting shot and stayed dead he would've remained a tragic but dearly beloved part of megatron's past. his death would've just been a terrible and heartbreaking accident. yet another precious thing sentinel took from him. megatron could've kept loving him long after he was gone. but because he survived just long enough for megatron to make the deliberate choice of letting him go and then came back to haunt him with divine proof that he was wrong megatron has no choice but to hate him forever.

[sleepyvib-es]

Jason who everyone believed would be great and Percy who knew that everyone except his mom believed he wouldn't amount to anything unless he proved himself. Percy who chose to make the Great Prophecy be about him so Nico wouldn't have to carry that burden after losing his sister. Jason who chose to confront Caligula alone so Piper would live after the oracle told him he or Piper would die.

Percy who believed he would die at 16. Jason actually dying at 16.

Imagine if Percy and Jason actually had the chance to have a genuine conversation about how being sons of The Big 3 hurt them in different but similar ways bc of what was expected of them and bc of how they were treated by people. Percy and Jason knowing that they can't really show weakness or insecurity or ever say that they were scared bc everyone at their respective camps were counting on their leadership.

Percy and Jason who had their own distinct journeys to be the heroes they became and both journeys were valid and important but did Jason and Percy ever believe for a second that they were important not for their parentage and achievements but because of who they are and actively chose to be

[vaguely-concerned]

thinking about how deeply lucanis' life has been defined by a lack of control of that life -- as he himself points out, even before the ossuary went and carved the headline out again with big bloody letters. of course he reacts badly to losing what little control he did manage to construct for himself even within those circumstances.

(namely: experience has taught him that things (caterina, loss, pain, love, all horribly and indelibly intermingled) will happen to him whether he wants them to or not and there's nothing he can do about that... but he gets to decide what's let in or out of his soul as it happens, even if he has to close it all down and deaden and numb himself out in the process. (even if that means he drifts further and further away from illario, who's been desperately reaching out and trying to keep hold of him until he finally gives up completely and tries to cut the bond all at once when lucanis doesn't seem to reach back anymore.) it's such rare well-observed freeze logic solidly constructed from the bottom up, I'm still so impressed with it.

the way illario seeks constant external means to cope with caterina's abuse and importance in his life -- he can't win her admiration or acceptance or warmth (or like. acknowledgement even, at times :') ), no matter what, so he goes out and finds those things in others and then disdains and dismisses it for how easily and falsely it's won from them. he plots, he conspires, he tries to beat her at her own game however clumsily, he tries. lucanis doesn't try things that way. he's not about 'how do I improve my situation' by nature, he's 'how can I stop this from getting worse'. he avoids, he internalizes, he hunkers down and makes himself nothing until the pain maybe ends. he's fundamentally not a plotter, he's a reacter. an expert assassin pantser, if you will, to illario's clear and stated exasperation fhsak. man I love them. illario says 'get us out of here!!! if you loved me as I love you you'd help me get us out of here before it kills us both', lucanis says 'there is no other place, there's nowhere to go, all we can do is endure. and if it kills us... well, that's just family. that's what love is (the way things are headed I'll die first anyway so it's fine I won't have to face losing you)', and they're equally baffled and hurt by each other's POV. but they're both right, and they're both wrong. there's no 'right' way to deal with caterina's treatment of them, or their situation. the house always wins, if you pardon the expression. house dellamorte still stands and that is what matters to caterina in the end more than anything.

it also fits so well b/c like... their core wounds are that illario is the least favourite and is constantly dismissed, so he has to prove to caterina again and again that he matters. not even that he's worth love or respect or warm regard, but that he's here at all and as such should be considered. he has to shout 'in case u forgot I EXIST!!' at the top of his lungs or else be rendered nothing within the family structure (and himself, because it's all about family, that's all that really matters. in some weird twisted way I think caterina openly declaring him before all the other crows to still be of house dellamorte -- and no one from house dellamorte kneels -- is kind of a victory for him, as much as it's also a furthering of a prison sentence and public humiliation. house dellamorte brainfuckery goes hard.). lucanis is the favourite, and it's the double-edged sword that he gets all the affection and attention but also all the control and impossible expectations. drowning under all of that constant stress and close evaluation, his brain whispers 'I don't exist' to try to escape, to hide and hold on to the deep parts of himself that are crucial to life but not part of the perfect grandson caterina demands of him as the price of her love.)

I think a lot about how what seems to disquiet lucanis the most post-ossuary (as it would anyone with that psychological makeup) is the dissolving of internal boundaries and control he's been relying on, which is part of what spite symbolizes. his anger and reactivity has seceded from the union to the point of personification as a little guy (a little guy he resents and fears for his unpredictability and invasions into regions of his psyche he wishes to stay frozen and barren, and yet cares about deeply, loves! and also constantly dismisses and frequently helplessly lets down unless he's helped to learn to do otherwise. does this remind you of another relationship in his life, perhaps. it makes me feel nuts to think about the illario/spite parallels thanks for asking), and now that little guy is out there running the show freely the moment he glances away or closes his eyes. literal nightmare scenario I feel for him so deeply. so much of his coping is predicated on being able to Not do or feel or want certain things, and that's out the window now, Spite has Opinions. Spite refuses to stay wisely in place even if that place is hell on the logic that if you move you could find yourself in a place that's even worse, somehow. Spite actually wants to experience the world, however fucked up and scarring the way he arrived here, not just endure it. Spite means he has to face that maybe illario wasn't wrong all those years, at the same time as having to admit and face what illario has done to him, and figure out what to do about any of it.

anyway. mary kirby ma'am that's some good fucking metaphor work. thank you, and sorry about all the shit that happened

[coquelicoq]

jiang cheng apologism is the easiest level of apologism. this guy is so hard to be mad at.

[stagefoureddiediaz]

The fact they keep referencing Eddie’s lying on the show and in interviews has me giggling and kicking my legs and twirling my hair.

It’s almost like we’re meant to read into the fact Eddie’s not always being truthful - with himself and others. Almost like, I don’t know, him going to confessional and telling a priest that he lied to everyone in his life and then later him telling that same priest that he’s straight might possibly be showing us Eddie not being truthful with himself or others!!

[itadooori]

Player 456. (alt color version under the cut)

[ulteri0rm0tives]

Now.. I'm not doubting Johnny somewhat (?) loved Alt in his own convoluted and severely misguided ways but uh.. to call them soulmates? Did we uh.. did we not play the same game? Watch the same scenes? Because it's crazy y'all r saying that when we literally play as his actual soulmate

[javierduffy]

different.

[sublimerences]

Sticking them into Pokémon as a design exercise… the teams are solely vibes and not based on any knowledge of proper team building or meta (of which I have no knowledge of!)