#act 1 is actually my favourite thing i've written i think

[rockingrobin69]

Snippet

One Monday Teddy asked, “Uncle Harry, why are your flowers always sad?” pointing to the newspaper under his nose. The pen was still in Harry’s hand, half-chewed.

“I,” he said, stopped. Squinted at the sketching, didn’t really see it. “Are they? Sad?”

“Yeah! Look at this one,” sticky-peanut-butter-finger wiggled very close to his face. “It’s all frowning and all.”

Did look at the lily in question, couldn’t really see where a face would be for it to frown. An eyebrow, maybe, in that line over there, or—“Oh,” when it hit him. The sagginess to the corners. “Yeah, I guess it is a bit sad.”

“They always are,” with a truly Hermione-level of self-assuredness. “Is it because of the, you know, the Terrible and Devastating Loss You’ve’ad Suffered and… everything Mrs. McGuire always goes on about?”

Choked on a startled laugh, buried his face in his palm. “Sorry! No, it’s not—sorry. Jesus, Ted, you surprised me there, is all.”

Thankfully, mercifully, Teddy laughed too. A bit like Malfoy’s laugh, loud and unselfconscious, a little wild. “Sorry, Uncle Harry! I didn’t mean to,” words lost in another burst of laughter. Harry’s chest went tight and over-warm, something fizzy and bright bubbling inside.

“Look at us,” he said in this thick voice he barely even recognised, “all sorry and silly like that.”

“So silly!” Ted shouted, delighted. “Gran would say we’re being so silly!”

“And what would Uncle Draco say?” with only a touch of self-loathing. Teddy’s smile went big, and he came closer, conspiratorial.

“He would say we’re being absolute gooses about it.”  

“Geese,” smiling helplessly. “He’d say we’re being silly geese?”

“Absolute geeses!” shouting, “that we’re—we’re—honking!”

They both roared with it, arm flailing, belly-aching laughter, shouting things like “honk!” and “goose!” and “stop, Ted, oh, god, stop,” flat on the table and laughing. Harry was constantly wiping his eyes, shaking his head, overwhelmed with how tight his chest was, with how much he loved this silly little goose of a kid, who used to be quiet, who still sometimes was. Who was scratched in the same ways Harry had been, and then in different ways altogether. For whom Harry was an adult, was a fixture in a life that wasn’t entirely stable, that was, still, full of warmth and bursts of laughter.

“Hey,” he tapped Teddy’s shoulder, “when he comes in here, what do you think Uncle Draco’s going to say?”

Ted made a serious face, quivering at the edges. “He’ll say, ‘what on earth is happening here!’ and then,” giggling too hard to continue.

“Then?” Harry tried valiantly, covering his own uncontrollable giggles under his hand, “then he’ll—laugh?”

“Honk!” Teddy screamed, and they both lost it, both utterly and helplessly entranced, both, probably, a little bit in love with the image they each conjured of a bemused, sparkly-eyed Malfoy coming in with his arms crossed, with his slanted smile, with his frizzy hair and the piercings all shining in the kitchen’s florescent light. With the questions already on his face and his willingness to partake in any kind of idiocy, of silliness, with how he’d probably only make it worse.

“Honk,” Harry agreed, used his sleeve to wipe some snot, “oh god, Teddy, you’re—” no words to describe it. On the floor, Teddy had begun on what he named his ‘loose goose dance’, which involved mainly elbows and the occasional shriek, and Harry lost it, entirely, perpetually, lost it.

“Teddy!” screaming and joining, flinging his elbows in every direction, belly simmering with it, with how—how silly and light and terrific it all was, everything was, in existence: that he had his godson and his kitchen and his Malfoy and his, this, this terrible, sticky, peanut-butter-smelling moment, this lunacy.

A noise from the door—and there he was, their Malfoy, arms crossed and his face torn between amusement and surprise: “Hello there, Teddington, Harry. What—what on earth is—”

They both cracked with it, sobbing, melting down to the floor: “What,” Teddy, and “on earth,” Harry, lost, both of them lost to it, lost. In the distance, Malfoy was shouting (“what? What? You have to tell me, what?”) and they were all losing their minds, all already have lost.

(From act 2 of Wonder Full on which I'm, yes, still working, promise!)

[glitter-stained]

thank you for all your jason posts! it's frustrating when some more titans-adjacent fans (especially hurts if you like mia and others too) like to warp any fans of him into being like serial killer fetishists, or act really misogynist and assume one only likes him for being "hawt guy", and then even warp some of his canon faults and shitty moments to be even worse than they are like saying he killed everyone at mia's school or wanted to SA her. at least charge him with the crimes he really did, people.

They claim he what

They said he wanted to do what to Mia

I'm genuinely upset about this

Also yeah that sexism towards jason fans thing is so real like yeah assuming we're so shallow calling us "fanon fans"/assuming with zero proof that we don't read comics (which you know is just repackaged "fake fan" comicsgate discourse) it's so fucking annoying like "jason fans have stolen traits from other characters and his personality is just fanon and they just like him because they think he's woman-coded because they actually hate women but what can you expect from stupid little girls who wouldn't know any better"

It's almost like because this character is popular amongst women there's this assumption of shallowness.

And also like, I do make a lot of post about how interesting he is and the catharsis he brings but I feel like in the end nothing I say matters when it can be waved aside with "you're just bending backwards to defend your favourite serial killer white boy you fangirl", nevermind 1) my actual gender and 2) that jason isn't even a serial killer. It's like, I feel like being a Jason fan I always have to prove I'm not shallow to others and have a right to my interest, which is a very usual, tiring experience and like, when in doubt people should assume depth and intelligence. Why do I have to defend my depth all the time? I shouldn't have to be defensive all the time I shouldn't have to perform the social equivalent of an IQ test to be allowed to engage in fandom.

There's a lot of sexism in fandom and yes, this can definitely happen to female characters, I've seen the way people talk about Stephanie Brown or Talia al Ghul and Jesus fucking Christ wth. And yes, at large, there's also a question of the impact of sexism on popularity at large, aka characters that would definitely be more popular if they were men. That absolutely does not mean that liking a male character somehow makes you a misogynist (and especially not with how talk of sexism in fandom doesn't often take into account gender stuff) and most importantly sexism in fandom is not limited to sexism towards characters. People are sexist as fuck towards female fans¹, notoriously real life human people. But I'm not fucking shallow. I know when I'm being called a fangirl even if it's dressed up in fandom speech. "Read a comic" how about you read all the meta I've written about all those comics I have read.

So anyway sorry that got a little out of hand I'm pretty upset about that one but I'm really glad you like my posts! I'm just tired because as much as I love literary analysis I just wish I didn't have to be on the defensive all the time. Maybe next time someone claims we're shallow we can join forces to print out all the good JT meta out there into one big book and beat them up with it- aside from that I'm all out of solutions.

Also just one last thing - "they just like jason todd because they think he's hot" this is comics. Literally everyone is hot. Who's your fav? Starfire? Oliver Queen? Kyle Rayner? Dinah Lance? Donna Troy? Raven? Cassandra Cain? Dick Grayson? Do you think your fav is ugly? (John Constantine fans this doesn't concern you). "They just like him because he's hawt" is short for "because I don't find anything interesting in him I'm going to assume shallowness and act sexist about it because I can't conceive that different people have different tastes and may enjoy different things than me without acting superior about it." But also it's ridiculous because again, this is comics. They're hot. 🤦

1. And towards female writers. Devin Grayson I haven't forgotten you. They should be so ashamed of what they did to you.

[chimken-nugget]

not trying to turn this into a warrior cats blog but i have to say, one of my favourite pieces of warrior cats media has to be the Cats of the Clans Field Guide.

Genuinely, this field guide acknowledges some of the biggest gripes I've had with the warrior cat series (and through the perspective of Rock !!).

Also, it's just super well written (imo, at least) and the art is gorgeous ????? The idea of the reader being in the perspective of 3 starclan kits talking to Rock is actually so peak.

Of course, we have the usual continuity errors that appears in almost every book post-TPB, and some stuff did not age well lorewise, but i don't think the writing team ever really thinks that far ahead for the lore to be properly coherent anyways.

I'm just going to share a few of my favourite things about this book, though i do recommend reading it yourselves.

Warning: Massive wall of text below

- Rock being unbiased towards any clan. One of the few books where I didn't feel like it was leaning towards one clan more than the other. Having each clan be represented by the 3 straclan kits (mosskit for river/thunder, blossomkit for shadow, adderkit for wind) is such a smart move. Any biases are portrayed through the kits themselves.

- Rock has these moments where he openly criticises the clans for the way they tend to consider themselves better than non-clan cats. He says that there have been better cats to exist who were never involved with clan life. It was honestly so refreshing to see this weird supremacy stuff get acknowledged.

- Rock also acknowledges that starclan is flawed. Throughout the book he wonders whether they have biases and mentions how strange it is that shadowclan keeps getting messed up by starclan (e.g. the nightstar situation). He also mentions how faith in starclan isn't everything.

ALSO ALSO, quote from the book: 'For once I believe Starclan has acted in every Cat's best interest'

"FOR ONCE",, I love Rock.

My only wish is that leafpool getting doomed by starclan (and the narrative) could've been acknowledged. However, this book was pre-OOTS perspective, so leafpool had not yet reached fully doomed status.

- Rock wonders whether tigerstar ever looks at hawkfrost and remember his persecution of halfclan cats (this drove me insane while reading TNP i am so glad it has been pointed out here)

- Something that stood out to me so, so much as well is the way Rock points out, and criticises how overlooked Sandstorm is and how she tends to be reduced to simply being the mother of Firestar's kits. Rock is a no. 1 sandstorm fan, and i agree with him.

- Rock's disdain of spottedleaf being in Firestar's business is so true. Thank you Rock for speaking on what the authors would later forget.

- Rock calls Tallstar's last-minute deputy change foolish. Tallstar is one of my favourite characters, but even I have to agree with this.

- PRINCESS SITS ON THE FENCE AND STILL WONDERS TO THIS DAY WHETHER HER KIN ARE SAFE

Genuinely, what ?? Did the Erin Hunter team actually just decide to sit down that day and properly (kinda) consider all the flaws of the characters they created.

idc what anyone says, i consider majority of what this field guide says to be canon LOL

[seaofreverie]

They Might Be Giants at the Roundhouse, London, 17th November 2024

Happy 35th to Flood, hooray!!!! So here's this thing that I've put together just in time for this occasion, my written record... I mean, my very lengthy and detailed review of the first and so far only TMBG show I’ve attended, on November 17th 2024 in London, so, the last show of the so-called “30th anniversary” Flood tour.

And yeah, I mean it that this thing is lengthy and mostly my personal insights on stuff but still, I wanted to share it since this was an event that I’d been anticipating for many many months, and I tried my best here to capture all the feelings this day brough and the whole magic and all the amazement surrounding it.

I’m also going to put here all of the 7 videos I took during the show, ranging in length from 7 seconds to 7 minutes. And they were taken from the front row, so the view is pretty great and something worth sharing I think!

So yep. Hope you enjoy!!

Every once in a while a day comes along in your life that feels like it’s been taken straight out of a movie. It’s hard to tell how often that happens, but probably not too often, since I can’t remember the last time it did before this. And what I mean here is that the day of my first TMBG show was pretty much nothing but moments that somehow felt just RIGHT, like everything was coming together just PERFECTLY, so that I could have the best possible experience and the best imaginable time!! Starting with my biggest wishes and hopes, down to all the extra details that I didn’t even think about previously. But anyway…

Before the show…

You’d think that I would start officially #freakingout about one of my biggest dreams in life coming true (seeing my favourite band, who are also one of my biggest special interests, in REAL LIFE, and enjoying one of their amazing live shows IN PERSON) earlier than this, but that only actually started on the evening of the day before the show. And because of that the entire next morning and afternoon felt really weird and tense in a way that I can’t really describe. But I hope you get what I mean. It’s like wow, it’s finally happening, but noooo wait hold on, I’m not ready yet…

And so my travel companions and I spent most of the day walking around Camden Town where the show was taking place, but for me that whole time was this really weird mix of feeling like I’m walking on clouds and like I’m just entirely somewhere else and also awaiting the scariest most important exam of my whole life.

We arrived by the venue sometime around 1 PM and when I saw the poster plastered on the wall that listed “An Evening With They Might Be Giants” among other acts, that was the moment when it maybe finally hit me that THIS THING WAS REAL. And maybe this is a good time to mention that the only thing left on the long list of all the things that could possibly still go wrong at this point, was managing to get a spot as close to the stage as possible, so, in the first row. And there were already two people just standing there by the venue when we got there and I actually couldn’t tell if they were already queuing up because, well, it was still so early. But I’m about 100% sure now that, in fact, they were.

Another important thing to note is that I was hoping to meet my friend at the show, who also attended the previous night’s show in Bristol, and me impatiently awaiting any sort of updates on how all of that went definitely added to all the nervousness I was feeling that whole day. And also, when I decide on something, well, I’m stubborn as hell so it HAS to go the way I planned it or I will be pretty much devastated.

But it was still super early and we had to get dinner and all that stuff so we left for now. And after some time I eventually got a message from my friend saying that NO, 5:30 will be too late for the first row, probably, and I was uhhhh, very on edge at this point. But ok. Better wait too long in the queue than regret not getting there earlier forever.

It was probably a pretty unusual sight to my brother (who I dragged along with me to the show) when I practically RAN to the venue when we were close to arriving there sometime past 4 PM. I swear I remember imagining that I’m already seeing a huge queue of people in front of me somewhere in the distance until I get closer and am relieved that no, no such thing happening, thank god. I mean, well yes, I was REALLY not even remotely chill about this whole thing guys. And yeah, it’s important to mention that I did travel over 1500 kilometers or so just for this show and nothing else. The whole trip and all the sightseeing I did in London in the days leading up to this day and afterwards was just an added bonus.

But alright, we got there. And what we were met with instead were maybe 15 or so people who were mostly scattered in small groups around the entrance. And a guy playing an accordion. Just in case I needed that extra confirmation that, yes, the gig I’m going to will be HERE and not in some other place. Yet I still had this worry as I started talking to one group of fans that waitttt, maybe they’re actually talking about some other band and I’m making a fool of myself…

But well yeah anyway, we were there, it was time to just wait for the big event now, time to be brave and use this opportunity to chat with other fans even a bit… And so I did, and despite not really having any opportunities to actually TALK in English to other people most of the time, I think I did pretty well. One thing that stuck with me the most for some reason was how these two guys were talking about how one of them doesn’t like BOOK and how that’s scandalous according to the other guy pretty much, and the other guy's statement on Synopsis For Latecomers was that whatever your opinion might be on the song, it’s still definitely a THEY song (I love that and I think about that all the time now, like man, it really is just They in a nutshell in a way).

And then my friend and their bestie arrived!! Just after we (all the people who were waiting already) decided to form some sort of actual queue. We found ourselves at the end of it, at least for now… And the remaining 2 hours of waiting for the doors to open were before us. It dragged on a bit of course but not TOO terribly, since I could catch up on all sorts of stuff with my friend, because we haven’t actually seen each other in oh, well over a year!

We talked about the Bristol show too among many other things, and I learned some important things, such as how Lie Still, Little Bottle got played already the day before, soooo… probably not much of a chance of it returning this evening (this might be like the only real thing I wish was different about this day because, AAAAHHH, THE STIIIIIIIIICK!!!!!! how I’d have loved to see that… But never say never, maybe it just wasn’t meant to be just YET!). And also how today the queue was luckily much smaller so, no being stuck in the third row this time!

Also, it started raining eventually, as it does in the UK, right, (it actually wasn’t rainy at all for most of the week I stayed there, just that day pretty much… another one of very few somewhat unfortunate things about this day) and it rained for probably close to an hour, and by god, did it get freaking FREEZING very fast. I inevitably had a huge cold for several days afterwards because of this, but well, what even is this sort of sacrifice, when in exchange you get the best possible concert experience. Because yeah, it definitely paid off to get there early, the queue never got SUPER long but still, wouldn’t have ended up where we did if it weren’t for that long wait.

And maybe now I should say some more general things about the wait, which is that this whole time, when I wasn’t feeling impatient, I was really just, truly soaking it all in (and not just the rain, lol). And a crucial part of that whole wait was that the accordion guy was still playing his songs, many songs of TMBG and at least a couple of John Linnell’s State Songs. I realize now that I should have written them down right after the show, because now all I remember him playing are Erase, South Carolina and West Virginia.

One funny thing that happened was when some guy walked by our (by then) pretty long queue and seemed surprised that there were so many people waiting for something. So my friend told him that we were waiting for a show and that it was a They Might Be Giants show, but what did he actually hear??

The guy: …Michael Jackson? But he’s dead!

So I guess that English speakers will also get the band's name terribly wrong sometimes, not just every vinyl vendor I’ve ever talked to back at home, lol. But yeah, he eventually got the name right but still, it’s really funny to think about… There May Be Giants, Michael Jackson… it’s all the same thing.

But alright, the last few minutes were drawing near… And then, at long last, we were in! And I guess I was so caught up in the moment (and also the fact that the security guy had a bit of an issue with my metal pins that I put on my jacket without really thinking about this possibly being a problem, oops) that I almost screwed up big time in a way because hey, we’re in, you’re free to go now, get your spot by the stage as fast as possible!! And so I got myself together, followed the example of my friend, and did that.

And ok, all in all, this was absolutely surreal to me. Only the very first of the many biggest this CANNOT be real moments of the night. Realizing that wow, we’re actually here… Nothing went terribly wrong in the end, we travelled all this way just to get here and here we are. And we’re in the first row!! OH MY GOD!! The folks who were ahead of us in the queue lined up by the left side and the middle of the stage, so we ended up to the right of Linnell’s keyboard and right in front of Marty’s drumkit. So we still had a very good viewing point if you ask me!

And I could NOT believe how close we were, the stage and all the instruments were SO CLOSE!!! This was actually my first time being in the pit at a concert, I’ve only ever known the balcony view… Meanwhile here they were, the legendary Main Squeeze in the REAL WORLD, the jackalope thingy on the drum kit that says They Might Be Giants… The pre-show music was blaring, everyone else was getting excited and I was suddenly HIT by all of it and how unbelievable and amazing and perfect it was and I was so so close to just crying right there because of it all…

But well, I collected myself and faced the fact that there was still at least an hour of waiting ahead of us (turned out to be an hour and a half, because the doors opened earlier than originally scheduled, but the show didn’t start until the original 8 PM anyway). But at least we were inside now, so no more freezing! And we could actually even sit down for a while finally (not that anyone besides me or my two friends did that from what I could tell, for once I managed to not care about how I appear to others and do what’s considered “normal” and it’s so great and important and such a big part of why this was such a wonderful evening in the end).

I also need to say that wow, Flansburgh’s intermission playlist really is so good. Not gonna lie that I was really excited for this part of the show as well, and I even had some very satisfying moments of recognizing a song or two and telling my friends about it (Funkadelic’s Can You Get To That will have a very special association for me now because that’s what was playing when we first got there). Some other memorable moments include when crew members were milling around the stage, and I’m pretty sure that none other than Stan Harrison walked in for a moment too?? Because those moments also served as constant reminders that THE GUYS will be here too, so soon…

Show time!!!

Set 1

Alright, time for what we all actually came here for. Time for the show. The lights went down for a moment, there were moderate amounts of screaming that made me feel like I’m back on a school trip visiting a theatre with other kids, who start screaming the moment it gets dark right before the play starts. But this time I was (even if just mentally) screaming along.

The recording of the song They Might Be Giants started playing, we watched a short animation on that huge screen at the back of the stage, and then, the scariest and most unexpected thing happened. The whole band walked in and after a couple seconds launched right into Synopsis For Latecomers. And I’m saying this kind of as a joke but actually though, can we agree that the emotion that comes with the first time you see *your band* in the real world is just something else completely and kind of impossible to describe. Because in a way it’s also just so funny: you arrived here specifically with the intention of seeing these guys and then, when that actually happens, it feels like the most shocking event of your entire life. A little MIND ERROR moment, wait hold up kind of moment, or even… a Brain Problem Situation, if you will.

But ok, I also need to admit that it didn’t help when I got distracted over the fact that less than half a minute into the song, someone from the crew walked onto the stage to fix something about Danny’s guitar. And with all that stuff put together I was only half aware of what was even happening and being played most of the time, and like a second passed before we got to the horns part of the song, and the horns entered the stage (accompanied by cheering from everyone). And it was all just. Happening. Right in front of me. Like it’s nothing and no big deal at all.

But anyway. While I’m still on the topic of this song I need to say that out of all songs played this one still stuck with me probably the most in a sense. Because days after the show I could still hear it still playing in my mind aaaaaaaall. the. damn. time. So all in all, this was definitely a total BLAST of a first impression. This is an amazing live song, and a 10/10 show opener, which I think is also fully supported by my reaction to it, as documented here. And the horns!!! The horns, ladies and gentlemen!!!

After the first song we got greetings and an introduction from Flansburgh, who said that this was the last show of the run of Flood shows… and that they had to figure out a way to include all songs from Flood in the show. So what got played next was the obligatory Particle Man, something that I found myself being all sort of like “alright, of course…” about at first... I mean… it is funny and don’t get me wrong, this song is great live, and I loved the whole “Triangle Man, take off for the planet, for the planet VENUS!” bit of course (oh it was really really great and GRAND and loud), but I guess this also shows how very quickly I got into this whole spirit of a regular TMBG show goer of sorts, who already sort of resents one of the most played songs… even before actually hearing it.

Next up was Meet James Ensor and here’s another really funny thing: how surprisingly hard it can be to identify the song that’s being played during a show. You know them all and know all the lyrics, and yet you aren’t aware of what you’re actually singing??? *HOW* does that work!! Because the whole time I thought it was actually James K. Polk, later I couldn’t remember which of the two it was actually… And I only realized which song this actually was on the next day, when a random bit of conversation reminded me that yes, those were the lyrics of Ensor that I was singing yesterday.

However, you must forgive me for these follies, because it’s hard to think clearly when you have to catch up with the fact that without pause, the next thing played is The Famous Polka. It’s like oh my god it’s actually THE Famous Polka. The infamous Famous Polka stage collapse incident (so, the first thing that comes to mind concerning this song, to me) aside, another notable thing about this song is that it’s SUCH a blast of energy live. I want to say that around this point of the show I started really getting into it and singing along and stuff (well, not singing yet on THIS song) and I’ll add some more general thoughts of this nature at the end of the post but by god, is the pure energy and excitement of a TMBG show impossible to convey in any recording. I think you just really have to be there to really understand what it’s all about. And a song like this one might be one of the finest examples of that.

And now, for something completely different… Moonbeam Rays! Lovely song that mostly helped me get into the mood of how beautiful this whole moment was, you know… I might be wrong about when exactly that was, but I got seriously close to crying once more during the show, and it’d be probably a fair guess to say that it was sometime during this song. And afterwards, we got some more insights from Flansburgh.

JF: This is the last show of the Flood show thing. (audience makes a sad “oooooh” sound) Yeah, it’s a little bit sad… it’s a little bit *excellent!* (audience laughs)

And then the Johns started talking about how they “started doing this pre-pandemic…” And it delighted me SO MUCH that they pointed this out because I could never get over how the Flood anniversary tour started when the album turned 30, and at the time of the last show of the tour it was two months away from turning 35!!

JF: It’s taken more years to celebrate the anniversary of Flood than it took to *make* Flood.

But as Flansburgh said, it was time to move on to some other, less popular things… And also he shared with us that he walked through a beautiful part of London today, wondering how it would feel to have enough money to “belong there”. Linnell said that he was resting up for the big flight, and that he was actually resting up for it RIGHT NOW.

JF: There’s nothing John Linnell likes more than a *paid rehearsal*.

JL: It’s a sweet ride… When you get to be *this* age…

JF: Nothing matters at all.

JL: Every day above ground is beautiful.

If you ask me, that last sentence deserves to be immortalized as one of the most iconic stage banter moments, and in a way it already has, because it inspired this wonderful piece of art, and who knows what else.

The following songs were Letterbox (and a short break from singing from me, because that song is already impossible to follow with, and then you add all the excitement of the moment and it’s impossible impossible) and Twisting!!! This started a long series of songs where the moment it starts I get super excited because I KNOW this song is a huge deal and a favourite but it takes me at least a couple of seconds to get to WHY this is a huge moment… through remembering and recognizing the song. And AAHHHH this song was so amazing, the bridgeeee, and then also the extra outro with the guitar solo and all, the energy!!! God, it truly is incomparable. And I totally didn’t expect that outro so that made it all an even better time.

And so we were well into the Flood songs segment, because next up was another of my top favourites from the album, Someone Keeps Moving My Chair! And another wonderful sing-along moment, but honestly, which of all these songs was not… (other than Letterbox, but that was just because of my lack of practice with that one). Chanting the title of this song, especially that one penultimate, elongated CHAAAAAAIIIIIIIR, kind of healed something in me I think.

After that was done, the Johns gave us some more insights into the performer’s life and all the things that they’ll never get used to, such as crowds that continue beyond your line of sight.

JF: …So you sort of think like: “I gotta get these people going, I gotta rock these people…” And then it’s like: (said in a silly, high-pitched voice) “But there’s no end!...”

Flansburgh remarked on the special challenge that they had come across this time, which was that we were all in a circular room, which is exciting, but means that people continue past where the stage is…

JF: I hope you guys got your tickets on Stubhub or something. I mean, can you even see us? I can barely see *you*. In a hockey match this would be unacceptable.

Another thing that Linnell would never get used to was when there’s a huge crowd of people, all of them happy and singing along, but then there’s one guy “who’s got this sort of Charles Manson expression”. This one really made ALL the people laugh. The Charles Manson guy included I hope.

JL: Never got used to that! For some reason.

JF: Tomorrow: Get. Linnell.

(JL pretends to be writing something down)

JL (addressing the audience): Not to put any ideas in your mind…

But moving on, as I said it was more Flood time indeed, with Whistling In The Dark. Me calling each single song amazing and a blast and so much fun is probably already getting a bit repetitive by now, so one special point of interest with this one and its live version is when near the end we get this little vocals only moment and then the horns come in again, then joined by everything else with such fanfare… simply triumphant.

Also, maybe this is a good moment to say that man, on one hand thinking about this show and how I’m going to hear THE ACCORDION was always a huge deal, but even then, I wasn’t prepared for how cool the accordion really is in person. It sounds kind of different from what I’m used to from recordings, and definitely makes a heck of a great impression all in all. One could wonder why it’s not more popular in rock music, because really, just how amazing is it?? And it can create all sorts of moods.. which is something I’m just about to get into properly too. Also, speaking of horns, Flansburgh gave a special shout out to the horns at this point, and began to introduce the next song.

JF: This next song is called The D-... uh, I forgot what it’s called, but… (JL laughs)

Even if it weren’t for this slip-up with the name, I already could tell from how Flansburgh went back to talk about how this was a song put together by Stan Harrison and introduced all the guys individually… That *IT* was in fact happening, one of my biggest hopes when it comes to songs I wanted to hear in person the most. The Darlings Of Lumberland - THE horns song to beat them all. And at this point I had to get my camera ready and start recording because well, this would definitely be one of the most preservation-worthy and outstanding moments of the show.

I was not mistaken of course, the way all the instruments complement each other here, most importantly the horns and the accordion, is something beautiful. This is one of the best examples of how the studio version just sounds so WEIRD to me now, even though it’s been my big favorite for a long time in that form as well. All in all a hypnotising moment, and coming back to my earlier question, maybe THIS was the only other song that you don’t really sing along to, because you have to just. Take it all in. Soooo much going on. And yes, no less important, THE CHOREOGRAPHY - *EVERYONE* did the hand thing!!! So you know, another good reason to have this one specifically caught on film.

Anyway, I was going to put my phone down for the time being but THEN... could it be, another of my top wished-for songs?? Cause yeah, without a pause we got the one and only screaming introduction to Let Me Tell You About My Operation from Flansburgh and oh boy, is this yet another song I could talk for many minutes about. First of all, I had very very high hopes for one of, what I think is often referred to as, Flansburgh showman moments. So, songs such as this one, Lie Still, Little Bottle, She’s Actual Size, and a couple others.

This song is a whole new story live, alright. Again, you have to be there to really get what it’s all about I think. JF’s energy is very infectious and awesome here to put it just mildly, and the horns add a whole lot, the whole song is just one big moment of old-timey big band-style musical bliss. And then there is also time to shine for all the other guys in the band, with awesome solos from Dan and Marty (ok, it appears that there was no special Danny time though?? Sad), AND the horns on the horns. Also Linnell doing this sort of thing on the keyboard where he plays all the notes quickly, sort of sliding down or up all the keys… Ok, I looked it up, I think that’s called glissando? So yeah, that also stuck in my head especially, because it was so fun. One of the top 5 moments of the show, without a doubt.

And now, alright, When Will You Die? is not a song that ever struck me as much of a favourite, besides being a very outstandingly hilarious and real song when it comes to lyrics of course, but I can’t lie and say that I wasn’t very happy to hear this one too. Singing these lyrics in a room full of hundreds of people who did the same was an incredibly grand moment, ok.

And then… then we were met with the haunting sounds of the intro of Road Movie To Berlin. A song that’s still, even after dozens of relistens, a whole experience each time I hear it when listening to Flood, and, as you might expect, it’s even more of an experience live. And I’m of course mostly talking about this whole sort of breakdown section near the end, but just the whole entire thing really hits anyway.

So when it started I definitely had a little moment of “oh shit, here we go, THE moment is here…”. Something akin to this happened over and over during the whole show obviously, but still, I feel like it was especially big here. Another thing is how later my friend laughed that they once again felt like they were the only person singing the secret third verse. Well, at least one more person did (me). Anyway, all in all it was just, magical, truly.

So, uh. Now, enjoy some top-notch banter that followed.

JL: So, uh, what’s going on here.

JF: We’re in London, John.

JL: We’re in London, we’re doing songs from Flood.

JF: We’re in yet another circular building.

JL: Right.

(a moment of silence)

JF: We’re doing songs from Flood. This is one of them.

(some people in the audience make clearly audible “wooo” noises)

JL: We get to woo.

(people laugh and woo even louder)

JL: There’s this thing in Britain where people get creative with the interactive thing. And it’s kind of good and it’s kind of, like… it worries us. The drunken part of it. It’s a problem.

(someone in the audience laughs in a very pronounced drunken manner)

Ok, Women And Men, that was the next song. Not much to say about this one to be honest, or like, anything at all really. And then more Flood, in the form of Your Racist Friend, which totally rocked, and we, I mean WE specifically, had the pleasure of standing where we could enjoy how Jordan Katz played his trumpet solo right in front of us. Honestly, this was kind of the only major downside of standing where we stood, that the horns were kind of hidden from our view for the most part… So this was a GRAND moment.

I have found that no matter how many times I watch recordings of it, the way Stellub gets introduced at these shows is always extremely funny to me, so here’s, like, almost all of how that went this time.

JF: Folks, we’ve got a very special treat for you right now. When we first embarked on doing these Flood shows, we thought: what can we do to make the show a little more challenging, a little more of… an endurance test. So we thought, we’ll take the time out to learn a song *sonically in reverse*...

(a long pause prompting audience laughter)

JF: …present it to the crowd… who might not enjoy that. (audience laughs) But then, we’re going to record it, on our very special fancy video recording machine, and we’re going to reverse the tape, and present it to you at the top of the second set, which will be… *pure entertainment*.

(audience laughs and woos. claps, also)

JF: …so think of the next two and a half minutes as a *musical investment in your future* (audience, well, laughs). If you brought friends here, we understand; they might be looking at you, going: “WHY?” (audience laughs some more) “Why this, why now? Life is complicated enough, why do bands *insist* on performing songs in reverse?”. But I can assure you, it’s a huge payoff. Especially if the machine works.

At this point I should give a shoutout to my uninitiated brother, who is not a fan of TMBG and whom I sort of dragged along with me here, although well, he did agree to this whole thing (besides the standing in the rain for two hours. He says that’s the part that he didn’t need to experience but well, what could *I* possibly do about that). Because he told me later that yes, the song in reverse thing was pretty cool. Well, I guess I could say as much anyway from how he definitely seemed very amused by Flansburgh’s introduction. But he also told me that if they didn’t say anything about this song being played in reverse, he wouldn’t even be able to tell, because it didn’t sound all that different from all the other songs. So I guess that answers my question of how newcomers may perceive TMBG’s lyrics, in a way. At least in the live show environment. It must be a lot to take in at once.

But anyway, the Johns joked about this whole thing some more (and how the screen was unusually huge for them and had this whole sort of 70s delay effect) and Linnell informed us that he would kick one of his shoes off at the end of the song and that we would also see THAT backwards.

JL: It’s just gonna be CRAZY! It’s gonna look… can’t even describe it.

JF (in silly gruff voice): Tonight! On video tape!

So, Sapphire Bullets Of Pure Love. You know, it’s just yet another of those things where I’ve been awaiting THIS MOMENT, IN REAL LIFE for so long. Very fun and at this point I sometimes even feel like I might be more familiar with the reversed sound of this song than the original… Like, it comes to mind more often. “stiiiiillub rah-fahs”, “stosh-nog, stosh-lut-sip” and similar phrases followed me around for days after the show. And I love how expressive the Johns are during this song, it’s just this whole theatricality of it that makes it very funny and awesome.

My favourite moment was when, in spirit of, well, all of this being performed in reverse, Marty also did the counting down to the start of the song with his drumsticks, but at the end. I read later that Linnell also used to sometimes instruct the audience to applaud before they start playing the song and damn, I wish he still did that because that's just hilarious.

And could this really be… the last song of the first set already - Brontosaurus. One thing about this song is that I used to not care about it much, until I saw a recording of their first live performance of it all the way back sometime around the end of 2022 / beginning of 2023, when I just about cried from the wonder of it all. This song is just a whole new thing live, in huge part thanks to the horns of course. Cathartic maybe is the right word for it. One of those songs that I could be pretty much 100% sure I would hear on this day but even despite that, when it actually came to it… Very very beautiful moment. Maybe this is when I almost cried again actually? Well, there were many contenders.

Set 2

So as you just read here, there was an abundance of stuff in the first set already that had me all like “this is the BEST!!!”, yet… We had this little moment of doubt with my friend, because: a) they were hoping to still hear at least a couple of songs that they didn’t already hear the previous night, b) I, having “analyzed” the setlists from this leg of the tour so far, in order to assess how likely I’d be to hear some of my favs, and if there’s any logic to how they change from night to night, decided that there’s two main setlist that the band alternates between. But based on the first half of the show so far it seemed to me like this was going to be a very similar set of songs to last night’s, and out of those two variants, the one I was hoping for less than the other… It was mostly them playing Darlings today once again that made me think this.

And all in all in my head it was like, well, I’ll probably get either the show with Darlings & Lie Still, Little Bottle (+the STICK!!!) OR the show with lots of miscellaneous songs that were very high on my wishlist. So, in either case I’d be happy, but maybe a bit more happy if we got the second option here…

Anyway. What I’m saying is that, keeping all of the above in mind, and how my expectations for the second set were shaped by that… I really can’t overstate how much of an UNREAL NO WAY YOU GOTTA BE JOKING THIS IS NOT ACTUALLY HAPPENING RIGHT??? time it turned out to be.

So let’s get right into why. And boy, there’s a lot. In a way this is when this show REALLY started for me, not that what was earlier wasn’t incredibly fun and amazing already but. This was just a whole different league. It’s like, I could say that earlier I felt at moments like I’m sometimes transported into some alternate dimension, and from here on it was all just, being transported into that joyous alternate dimension for the whole duration of the show. The TMBG dimension. I’ll get back to this, but being here was really just something like, a different type of existence, so different from the often bleak daily life that I’ve been way too familiar with until then.

One thing that sort of added once again to this whole “it’s all perfectly falling into place” feeling, even before the show started up again, was how I tried to pay attention to the intermission music again, and remembered from my days of watching many live show recordings in late 2022 how someone pointed out that when this one specific song plays, you can tell that the show will start in just a moment. And yeah, they were right. Girl Don’t Come started playing so I knew…

And so the second set started with the reversed recording of the Stellub performance of course (how many times have they performed it by that point? Over a hundred? But yeah, it was scarily accurate, as always), and the alternate version of Hearing Aid with this whole little animation thing, which was also a lot of fun to watch actually.

And so the band was back for the second round… with Memo To Human Resources! So I’d known for a while that this song has been a pretty oft played one recently, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen any recordings of it live? And to be honest my memory of this song is really blurry, so it’s still kind of an enigmatic moment to me now, all in all I’m sure though that it must have hit the same way Moonbeam Rays or Brontosaurus did, and that might explain this whole effect it presumably had on me, heh.

And now, ok. Man, It’s So Loud In Here will never ever feel the same way to me again. Because actually nothing could have prepared me for how amazing it was live. And I didn’t even particularly anticipate this one, but when we got to it… I knew already that it was going to be a blast.

I remember thinking that this is one of those moments that you simply can’t capture in any way, you’re just fully here in the moment and you live it there and remember it forever. I was also thinking about the meaning of the song, about this classic TMBG fashion of singing this song in this huge room full of people, a song about how it’s so loud in here. And I was wondering if that’d be another of those little confusing moments for people unfamiliar with TMBG because yes, I suppose it’s pretty silly… On top of being an incredible and actually moving experience. I’m shedding a tear just thinking about it all now.

So now, more Flood time! Minimum Wage, a song that, per Linnell’s words, they’ve been playing “for 40 years”...

JL: …And we just got to the point where we all end at exactly the same time. We had so much integrity for so long… And now we’re just sleek… robots up here.

JF: Yeah, that AI showbusiness stuff. Nobody likes it - you gotta do it, you know. It’s the way people DO IT!

JL: I’ve got six fingers…. (JL demonstrates how he has six fingers, apparently)

JF: Yeah, yeah… (with emphasis) *AI*.

(long pause prompting audience laughter)

JF: It makes its own punchline!

But um, what was next on the agenda (John)? More songs from the Flood album, oh yes! Let’s give the people some more of what they want!

JL: That feisty… that album by that bunch of maverick… young… rulebreakin’... (pause) But those days are gone.

JF: Well, the one thing that remains is the barricade putting eight feet between us and the front row. That’s the important thing. The distance.

JL: And you know, it’s not for *our* protection, it’s for *yours*.

Alright, so here’s another song. Here’s another song from Flood. And that song is We Want A Rock. What I remember the most about this one is, once again, the beauty of being able to sing these “ridiculous lyrics” when everyone else is doing the same thing, when we’re all singing about how everyone wants a rock to wind a string around and about how everyone wants prosthetic foreheads on their real heads but someone in this town is trying to burn the foreheads down. At some point I just couldn't help having a little laugh over the joy of it all. And also, *boom boom boom* “ooooOOOOOOH!!” *boom boom boom* “oooooOOOOOOH!!”

Then it was Marty time, starting with the drum intro and the BUZZER, for it’s time for Hot Cha! Which becomes even more of a blast with the HORNS of course, and at the very end, can you believe it, I forgot that they change the last line of the song to “please come home” live, so I was slightly taken aback by that. Yes, that’s important to mention here, somehow.

Flansburgh introduced the next song as a song from the Lincoln album and for some goddamned reason the only song I could think of at the moment that fit that criteria was Shoehorn With Teeth.

It was not Shoehorn With Teeth. It was the song that came back to live rotation earlier in 2024 during the spring US tour, but seemed to fall from it afterwards once again, which was a shame, because it’s like, probably my favourite TMBG song to be honest and its newest live rendition was absolutely breathtakingly amazing from what I’ve seen from recordings online. I’m not sure if I was aware by that point of how it miraculously returned as an encore at the show of the night before…

But still, this was like the biggest “this can’t be real actual and happening right now” moment of the night, and maybe. of my. entire life?? And it of course took me a couple of seconds to recognise the song STILL, besides the instant punch of that *feeling* that happened the second the song started. Yeah, Where Your Eyes Don’t Go, played live at my show just like I dreamed about, no big deal, everyday stuff, haha.

The song really IS freaking amazing live though. Where would we be without THE HORNS!!! And honestly I could say a bit more about this “fav song” situation, because not only is it of course among my most beloved ever songs at this moment and has been for over two years, I also remember distinctly that it was the FIRST TMBG song that I loved and couldn’t get enough of and replayed over and over, and it’s a big reason behind why I became a fan in the first place. So, the extra beauty of the significance of it all, it just blows my mind completely.

So, Lucky Ball And Chain was a short little break for collecting myself again, because obviously we were far from done with all the biggest wonders of the night still. And I’m not saying that the song wasn’t a good time, it of course was just like everything else here, so it’s safe to just assume that without me specifying each time. Lol.

But, as I said, the break was short. I would have put seeing Spy live somewhere at the top of my general life goals / bucket list thing, if I had one, that is. I had been very vocal about wanting to see THAT song in particular in discussions with my friend, so the excited glance we exchanged the moment this song started was absolutely priceless and a thing of pure wonder.

Anyway, we all know Spy. We all know that it’s one of the most often played live songs of theirs, and that the reason behind its live durability is the several minutes long improvised jam band section at the end. And I might be one of those maybe rare kinds of people who wouldn’t mind hearing it a hundred times more. It IS improvised after all, so… different each time, ha! It was also very vital to me that I get to take part in the audience participation segment of it… and this is also what was granted to me on this magical evening by whatever godlike forces exist above.

So yeah, this was yet another among the top 5 show moments of course… The biggest highlights here were when Linnell did this sort of old-timey speech (“THIS! Is the *sound* of the thirties. The sound of the SWING ERA!”) that’s probably a reference to something that I’m completely unfamiliar with so that only makes it funnier, and the whole audience conducting part from Flansburgh at the end, because man, he was having a total BLAST with this, it was such a joy to see. And we were all also having a great time, by doing our part and screaming as if we’re in hell. All I’m trying to say here is. I love hellish noise, I love cacophony. This is my perfect kind of show experience, I won’t be hearing any arguments about this.

Ok, so what was the next thing that the Johns prepared with the intent of dealing the biggest emotional damage imaginable to us? Well, remember how Last Wave had never been played live until earlier this year and then they never played it again. Guess what happened now. Well, that’s yet another of the huge and one of the earliest personal favourites of mine returning onto the setlist on the previous evening actually.

This song is. Augh. I just love how it has this sort of elegant, but emotional sound that kind of sets it apart. It’s a completely singular song to me in every sense and I always wondered why they never played it live, but now I’m just glad they finally started playing it. Gotta love yet another AMAZING trumpet solo from Jordan Katz and the Johns’ overdramatized delivery of the lyrics, it’s so much fun. And this song also provided us with some more epic Marty moments, especially the solo and the ending, both just like on the studio recording technically… So maybe that’s why they were so great to see recreated in real time too?

JF: I think we were all a little stunned by the majesty of the ending of that song.

Two days before the show I went to the Natural History Museum here in London, and that's actually very relevant here because when I saw the exhibit that was entitled “Mammals” in that museum, that was when the SONG Mammal started following me around in my mind, for like, most of the remaining time of that day. And I had the amazing realization that oh, it’s not impossible that I could hear this song this next Sunday, played live, so awesome!!

So yeah of course, they played Mammal next. And honestly I’m not even that attached to this song, I do still love it though and it’s one of those situations where I see myself become excited over songs that I feel like are big fan favourites and something that other people are probably very happy about hearing, heh. But maybe even more important yet is that this meant APOLLO 18 representation!! So special to me.

Now I’ll just say that it’s worth it avoiding spoilers sometimes. Like, show spoilers, because I guess I didn’t actually watch that much recent footage and so I had no idea about what other awesome fun stuff was just about to happen.

JF: Folks, folks… we’ve been informed by the people who work here that every single person in the audience tonight is carrying a silly little phone with them. And we'd like to take full advantage of that right now…

We were instructed by Flansburgh to get our phones and open our camera and set it to selfie mode! And then Turn Around, Turn Around, (there’s a thing there that can be found)…

JF: We can see you now and I can tell that nobody is doing what I’m talking about.

You know, so this is when you get to live that wonder of actually BEING THERE once more. And enjoy the way that specifically TMBG shows are, because I’ll be real, I can’t think of any other concert where I could see something like this happening.

JF: Everybody, spin around for just a little bit, get a selfie and we’re gonna photobomb your selfie.

JL: Which we tried to do last night and nobody was getting it!

JF (interrupting): That’s not true! On social media you’re gonna see some very good evidence that some people got together over the course of the twenty minutes we dedicated to this portion of the show.

So yeah, now I can even keep on living my life knowing that I technically have a photo with my favourite musicians in the world. Definitely not something I expected to gain after this day.

JF: We’re gonna take a lot of time doing this. This is possibly the least important thing we’ll be working on…

So that was awesome!!! BUT WAIT THERE WAS MORE!!!!!!

JF: Ok folks, this the second part of the test: see if you can find the flashlight portion of your phone - the more traditional rock portion.

That “more traditional rock portion” part must have been lost on me then, because this was still a singular moment to me (I haven’t been to many live shows before this anyway), and I could only really think of one other thing that this immediately reminded me of. I like yearning for all sorts of things, including those that are in the past now and that I never even could have had a real chance of participating in. Such as the Hollywood Bowl show in 2023, where TMBG opened for Sparks, and during the Sparks show and the song All That everyone in the audience took out their phones and there was this whole sea of lights, people swaying with their phone torches to that song. So, yes, I was NOT expecting either that I’d get to experience THIS as well. After all.

At first I wasn’t even aware that all the stage lights had been turned off for the next song, because with all those torches facing the stage it was so bright in here!! And the song that got this special treatment was Dead - very fitting I must say. The large procession waved their torches AND sang, and I can hear it on the recording of this song especially that the audience was really into the singing part. Loud and beautiful and touching to be there.

And then it was time to thank the band, since the end of the show was actually drawing closer and closer, as absurd as it may have seemed to think about… (not that there was really time to stop and think about that anyway). And I think the Johns did some sort of jab at Elektra Entertainment here, but I unfortunately couldn’t catch what they were saying, rip. Anyway, it must have been very funny I’m sure.

So what songs could possibly still be left and ahead of us now? Two more songs from Flood, here we go.

Why is the world in love again? Because it's time to be marching hand in hand and singing Theme From Flood! And once again being reminded of how WE'RE ALL HERE TOGETHER. All in all, the moment of this song, and it going right into Birdhouse In Your Soul, yes, that was just as ethereal and unreal as I imagined it would be. Even now, as I'm thinking back to it, I start to feel overwhelmed with the excitement, how I was just sort of going “YES YES YES!!!” in my head, after the “I'm your only friend” bit, when it gets kind of quiet for a second and it starts up again we're all jumping and cheering. I could only try to picture an approximation of this scene in my mind months earlier, so thinking about how this actually happened is still absolutely surreal to me. There's just nothing else like Birdhouse.

…

Damn it, I still have a bit more of the show to write about, it’s not the time for tears, brother.

I didn’t want the song to end and it almost seemed like the band didn’t either, because Linnell kept singing the “soul” at the end for several more seconds and also making it goofier still.

Encores time

End of show? No, two encores now. The encore waiting and clapping time until the band comes back on stage felt much much shorter than it always did when I watched recordings of shows. Shouldn't be surprising but everything here felt like it took 10% of the time it actually lasted.

So it was time for the most wondrous thing, a John and John only performance as a duo! This wasn't a total surprise to me, because I knew they switched up the way they play this particular song once again, on some nights at least, but I couldn't be sure that I'd be blessed enough to witness it myself too… And here it was, about to happen!!!

People were screaming Istanbul a lot. I could’ve been easily more annoyed by that, but you know what, I think this is necessary too. How could this be a REAL concert experience without a bunch of presumably drunk people shouting out the titles of songs and being annoying. Maybe if one of those people was standing close to us I'd be talking differently, but… It's part of the charm, sorry.

It was in fact Istanbul (Not Constantinople) time. I’ll be honest, if it weren’t for the duo format I would have not cared for this song any more than I did for Particle Man. But it turned out to be one of my favourite things on this show, yeah, this evening subverted so many expectations in every sense, alright.

You could argue about the significance of the duo format here because OMG, it’s just like in the old days!!!! The good old days or whatever. But no, it’s also just… I don’t know. Even to me, who obviously hasn’t known TMBG for that long, it was another of those kind of touching moments. And what made it all even better was when soon after this show, I happened to watch a video of a Flood show… from 1990. Like wow, this really is kind of just like the 1990 duo days. EXCEPT it’s much cooler now actually.

I didn’t record this song but definitely would have if our view for it was better. Well, thankfully someone else took care of that anyway. And I think that instead of me trying to describe it here, everyone should just do themselves a favour and watch it. I can't get over how beautifully unserious and funny this performance was, watching that must have been the most fun I've had in a looooong time. Again, top 5 moments of the night, maybe top 3 even.

Now, what were the funniest bits. “Peoplejustpeoplejustpeoplejust…” and the Get In The Car bit. And the “yeeeeeees”. And the “noooooo”. And the “istanbuuuuuuul…. ouuuuu…. oouuuuuu…”. You get it, right.

Can’t Keep Johnny Down was the second song of the encore and this performance is the only reason why this song suddenly became like, a literal favorite. The power of live shows! Now whenever I hear it I'm just like. OOOOOH Johnny. Save me Johnny, save me.

Linnell told us “thanks so much, you guys are great!” before they all left the stage :) And of course there was still one more song that I had to hear today. So after more clapping and cheering they were back on stage again.

JL: Yes! Thanks a million. No! Two million! (in a bit of a jokey voice) …I’ve never thanked that much before.

And you know what, I choose to believe that he meant it.

The last song of the night was Doctor Worm. I don’t know what else I can say about this song now, just that upon relistening to this whole show again I’m realizing that I could just. call this song kind of a perfect live song. Maybe I associate it with live shows more than anything else since it's not featured on any studio album and I've definitely heard it wayyyy more times in the form of live recordings than the studio version. And also maybe I lied that Synopsis haunted me the most after the show, Doctor Worm must have been even more insistent in that sense, and I had no issue with that honestly.

And so, with the last one “They call me Dooctooor WOOOOOORM!!” and a finishing BWAAAAA from the horns, the show was over.

After the show

Don’t worry, there’s much less to talk about now in terms of the after show stuff compared to before the show. Just this one important thing that, yet again, as if this wasn’t ENOUGH ALREADY…!!! We had to hang out by the stage for a bit longer still, because there’s a chance of ending up with a SETLIST. Or a drumstick. But I guess the setlist was more important.

And Marty walked over to us. And handed us the setlist. I mean, it was my friend who grabbed the setlist, but to me that was just like we all were chosen, it really didn't matter to me who actually had it. So it was a win! I really couldn’t ask for anything else by that point. I got it all.

Then we had to wait for a bit by the merch stand because lots of folks gathered there and thankfully, there was still lots of stuff to choose from! I would have loved to go a bit more crazy with this maybe, but since I still had to keep in mind having to travel back with all this stuff, flying, customs and all that… I settled for a tour shirt, because yeah, a shirt with the dates of the tour I ATTENDED printed on it? I needed that, that would do as the only physical souvenir even, no need for anything more (well, I actually did get a bit more, because the very next day I went by a random record store here in Camden Town in hopes of finding THE album somewhere in London still. and guess what I found….., but that’s a whole different story so let me just limit myself to only the day of the show in this post). The shirt is a total slay by the way, I love the burgundy color.

After we left the venue we still managed to bump into more folks going back from the concert. And like 3 different people in total who asked us about the setlist and where we arrived from, said that woooow, you deserve to have it then. Thank you people for also appreciating all the hard work that went into this.

My brother & I had a very short way back to our hotel now, so in the end it really felt like we just returned from a quick little fun event just down the street. Even though we travelled pretty far to get here, you know. So it didn't even feel like some huge endeavour or anything all that unusual, and I mean that in the best way possible.

So my day ended with my head full of thoughts and images and fragments of songs looped ad nauseam. And also with an aching back and no energy left in me to stand for even one more minute. The tiredness was very real but I must say that tired-happy might be one of the best emotions / states one could have to deal with. I hope I can do all of this again someday, because I’m actually so serious that I wouldn’t mind going to a TMBG show every other evening if I could. That’s the dream actually.

Miscellaneous T(houghts) time

Ok, I swear I’m almost done. Just a couple general / finishing observations about the show as a whole now.

● First of all, I want to come back for a bit to that TMBG dimension thing. Because this whole thing really was sort of like entering some sort of different mode of existing. The Johns are very funny guys and the whole band’s energy is extremely infectious, but I also think it’s a very special thing how their stage presence creates this whole atmosphere that’s just completely laid-back and fun in the purest form of fun. Even when there’s a big crowd and we’re in an “important” venue. Because you sort of really feel at home, like you’re exactly where you belong. And earlier I could imagine it being more like, oh the stakes are so high, because this is THE EVENT, finally. And in reality this was the most relaxed I’ve felt in a very long time. And I was almost painfully aware of how I was watching it all with sparkly eyes, hoping that it’s maybe not too obvious because waaaah, embarrassing, it’s not like I’m having the best time ever right now or anything, please.

● However, all of the above definitely had a lot to do with how the audience was at the show, and I was just really surprised by how very awesome the audience's energy was. Like I could imagine it being maybe less enthusiastic after all because uh well, maybe a lot of people actually could be here more for Flood and Birdhouse and all that rather than the actual band… Shouldn’t have underestimated this fanbase, because the audience was so responsive to everything and just made it feel even more like the explosion of joy it really was. And I really felt like I was with *my* people, and, especially when it’s a huge group like this.. that’s very rare and special to me.

● I’ve discovered that in TMBG dimension time isn’t real because I swear, when the first set was coming to a close, I felt like maybe only 20 minutes passed and we’ve only heard maybe 6 songs so far, instead of the actual. 17 songs. 17?? damn, that's a lot of songs. I actually haven’t counted them until now. And it was 33 songs in total, 36 if you add the intros and reversed Stellub, huh!

● You people weren’t lying about the Linnell stare. Actually, related to this, another worry I sort of had before this was that should I end up close to the stage, I might feel too awkward about being possibly perceived by the band in any way to truly enjoy myself. But that actually wasn’t the case at all, not counting like a couple of moments only where I’d make maybe-imaginary, maybe-real eye contact with someone from the band and have to look way fast because noooo, don’t perceive me actually, lol.

● And again, you people weren’t lying either that these guys have unbelievable amounts of energy that make you feel like an old man who can barely stand for a couple hours in comparison. This is coming from a 23-year-old, maybe not the most athletic person in the world, but still. Also, Marty really is the guy of all time, loved watching his antics. And one more special shoutout to the Tricerachops Horns, because yes, these songs I’ve loved for a while already CAN get even better and simply epic and beautiful.

All in all, best show ever! Honestly, I don’t know if any other show could possibly top this. I would be very happy to be proven wrong of course, especially if that were to happen because of another TMBG show. Thank you Johns and everyone else for this evening, it was a dream come true and I’ll never forget how out of this world and amazing it was!!

[quietwingsinthesky]

20 Fanfic Author Questions

I was tagged by @quicksilver-castiel!

1. How many works on AO3?

Once I filter out my podfics, I'm at 1,383 works!

2. Total AO3 Word Count?

I am currently at 908,139 words, so million word mile mark coming soon! bit by bit.

3. Top 5 fics by Kudos

Extremely funny looking at this list because one of my top kudosed fics is actually an anonymous fic I have never revealed and probably never will lmao. But aside from that. You'll Figure It Out When You Get There - Five Nights at Freddy's - 1,445 Kudos and so the tower fell - Supernatural - 544 Baby Bird - Supernatural - 444 Reboot - Five Nights at Freddy's - 403 Home Woven From Broken Parts - Hollow Knight - 346

4. What fandoms do you write for?

At the moment, I am like. deeply caught by Assassin's Creed, and while I'd really like to write for other fandoms, I genuinely can't focus on anything else. The hyperfixation bug is fucking real and I do not know how long it'll last.

5. Do you respond to comments?

I... try.

6. Angstiest Ending?

I feel like because it's about a kid being murdered, A Dark and Stormy Night probably qualifies as the angstiest.

7. Fic with the Happiest Ending?

Off the top of my head, and I do have a poor memory about even the things I've written, it's probably Mother of All Monsters just because it is sappy and sweet and there's a very pregnant devil in it.

8. Do you get hate?

When I get noticed, at least someone is gonna get mad about it. Such is the way of these things.

9. Do you write smut?

lmao. yeah <3 let me put it this way. at least 36% of my posted works are smut.

10. Do you write crossovers?

On occasion, when the mood strikes. I'm not much of a crossover writer or reader, but sometimes, sometimes, something pops out as a possibility and won't leave me alone.

11. Ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge, no.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! It's a delightful thing to me! I'm so proud of it! There's translations in Russian, Chinese, and German.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

I have not, not at this point. I'd quite like to!

14. All time favourite ship?

Forever and always Samifer <3 you couldn't tear me away from it if you tried.

15. WIPs you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Do we mean posted or just on my harddrive because. there are horrors in there. just a graveyard of unfinished fic.

16. Writing strengths?

I like to think, and I do take pride in this, that I am very good at writing smut. In all that entails, from the physical description to the emotions involved in the act and such.

17. Writing Weaknesses?

Jesus christ i hate dialogue i hate dialogue i hatee dialogue i don't understand how people talk.

18. Thoughts on mixed language dialogue?

I... am perhaps not the best person to ask? Monolingual ass. Sometimes it's quite jarring, sometimes it comes across very naturally. Sorry, terminal assassin's creed brain, but I can find it very jarring when reading AC fic specifically where the characters only use one or two words in another language, when the source material will have that, yes, but also entire sentences of dialogue translated. It's why I generally avoid doing it. If I can't actually speak Italian, I don't want to make a damn fool of myself.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Posted? Star Wars. Written down anywhere? Probably Guardians of Ga'Hoole. Just thought about it in my head constantly? you ever seen the animated kids classic bolt.

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

christ there's over a thousand of them uhhhhhhhhhhh fuck it im deciding it's my jilco fic this week. everyone go read with enough love (you'll get your hands dirty). it's a damn good fic, and jinx was so fun to write the manerisms of, and all of my favorite fics i've ever written are ones that hold that delicate balance of being about an indefinably intimate relationship.

anyhow! i shall now tag @73chn1c0l0rr3v3l, @seanwinchester, @honestlydarkprincess, @holyfreaks, @19catsncounting, @samiferboy, @soulless-angel25, and @uss-genderprise. and whomever else sees this, please do! I really love reading these sorts of questionnaires from my mutuals aklsjdakjd

[circlejourney]

Owl House thoughts up to season 1 episode 13 (be warned that the front half is mostly negative):

OK, the episodic format has gone from just bearable to testing belief in some recent episodes. I've never been a huge fan of the episodic format because the constraints of wrapping up an entire 3 act plotline every episode can force some bizarrely rapid turns in the plot that then fail to have any immediate impact on the characters' relationships with the world. like. King writing a novel in a day, landing a book deal and shipping the book to stores the next day, hammering out a second book that same day, being told to rewrite it, and then Luz writing a whole book by the next day? And then it all gets cleaned up by the end? Even with magic, I Cannot stretch my willing suspension of disbelief into any configuration that will accept this as consistent with any reality, so I have chosen to pretend that that episode did not happen, other than the concurrent side plot about Lilith and Eda.

Related: the fact that a long-upheld rule that every student in Hexside is allowed just one magic track, a by-product of conforming with regulations in the name of funding, the rule that the show got us invested in as a structural challenge in an earlier episode, simply...vanished after one (1) battle. It's not that I like the rule (I don't) but that its removal was so easy that I have to wonder what having it there even did for the story in the first place. It's a cheap source of tension if it is only relevant in 2 episodes and then vanishes the third time it's mentioned. I get it, it was catalysed by a genuinely life-threatening situation. But in terms of pacing, it took. One Episode. another coin in a "YA shows shouldn't be held to the episodic standards of children's series" jar and also I hope they at least go into depth about the repercussions of the principal just. getting rid of the rule after a group of students did 1 badass thing.

Anyway had to get that out of my system first. I am of course delighted that there is more Amity, and it looks like my vibes about her were spot on. She clearly has something to prove and doesn't think just doing well is enough; her sense of worth / skill is reliant on her being uplifted above others around her and this seems tied to the unrelenting standards of her siblings (whom I Really dislike by the way, because they remind me of people I knew when I was younger). It brings me great joy to see a character who was previously hostile to another character gradually warm up to them while still holding onto some reservations or having that change of heart tested

God I love that Amity makes dorky doodles of herself as a self insert in stories she likes. and other assorted indulgences. the way that Amity's onscreen presence is contrasted with these written/drawn windows in her psyche are one of my favourite storytelling things about the series so far. that said I really hope Luz stops taking Amity's stuff and peeking at her books without asking

So, it is confirmed that magic skill: is to some degree innate and reliant on the body of the caster (i.e. the magic sac thing wasn't just something Eda 100% made up even if I'm still doubting it purely on topological grounds), can be honed to be stronger and/or more finely controlled, and can be boosted by casting aids (which absolutely love as a worldbuilding element). Feels like learning to ride a bike.

Luz's way of doing magic is inherently very appealing and I like that the show recently made the connection that these sigils are inherent to the primordial form of magic, and that reproducing the symbols also channels the same power. this idea that there are "true symbols" reminds me of the true names in Earthsea by which one can gain power over the thing being named.

so then...how was this form of casting lost? I have to believe that the symbol that Luz sees in the snowflake is not actually quite so prominent and obvious, nor do they last quite that long (i.e. it is a concession to clarity in the animation) and it takes careful observation and patience to elucidate them. which Luz needs to hone. IS THIS GOING TO BECOME THEMATIC TO HER CHARACTER ARC I hope it does.

giant dead creatures plot relevant confirmed ?? I want to know if some of these things are related: lots of giants dying in this area, bat queen being separated from her giant's staff, the fact that humans haven't been in this world for thousands of years (to the point where it's seemingly become a quasi-archaeological thing), the fact that magic casting via symbols has not been regularly performed in thousands of years...I think artistically speaking this is my favourite thing about the show so far - the sense of history brewing beneath everything - and this is why the episodic throwaway plots bother me so much

The emperor is obsessed with things that make him younger / extend life? how old is the emperor actually, surely the fact that he was seeking a flower of immortality wasn't just some throwaway detail...

I am so here for Hooty and King's friendship. thank goodness for Hooty

[bonzos-number-1-fan]

TMAGP 22 Thoughts: Couples Therapy

A really great episode. Everything about this one was so well done and I don't think I've got a single complaint. Not that I often have those but still. It'll be interesting to see how much of this is deeply plot relevant and how much is just a fun spooky time too. This is another belated post on account of a hospital visit, and a half-written draft getting deleted. Hopefully we'll be back to our regularly scheduled posts for next week.

Spoilers for episode 22 below the cut.

Lena is just the best, isn't she? Unfortunately we just learned that she's married and so I've got no shot, but still. Lena is great in every scene she's in and I'm really glad we get so much of her and Gwen as they have stellar chemistry. I'd be interested to see if this ministerial visit goes anywhere. I'm not 100% whether it was a plot hook or a convenient way to not fire Gwen. She's obviously not in Lena's good books so she this could be a way to explain away not firing her so she can leverage that position for something and avoid the firing.

Augustus incidents are always such a treat. This one probably wasn't maybe my favourite of them for the incident itself but it was for the sound design and the music. They really hit it out of the park for this one IMO. Unfortunately this is likely the last Augustus statement of the season if it's sticking to the 1 per act cadence. Of minor note this does disprove that .JMJ errors herald Augustus in some way.

Okay, onto the statement proper. Hans Berger and Dr. Richard Caton are both real people, and the information within this statement is largely factual. Berger did invent the EEG in 1924, held off on publishing his research due to the reaction he presumed it'd received, and when it was later published a lot of the scientific community at the time was ready to discount it. It took quite some time before what he'd managed was really appreciated. But don't feel too bad for him as he also worked with the Nazis. So coercing a patient into getting their brain ejected from their skull isn't the only sin of his. Caton is similarly accurate here and the two of them had similar fates with their research. Without Caton's work Berger likely wouldn't have been able to create the EEG and Berger was one of the few people to give Caton's research much attention at all. It came very close to being forgotten about. Ursula was very real too and did start as Berger's assistant before they got married. Although not mentioned in the incident is that she was a baroness.

Okay, so the big thing in this one is obviously the experiment itself. I've heard quite a few theories on what's actually going on here. Lots of talk about it being Freddy or JMJ. I generally think that's a massive stretch that doesn't really mesh with anything in the text of this, nor the historical context of Freddy and JMJ. The incident predates both Freddy as software and JMJ appearing as voices by not insignificant margins. It's obviously entirely possible that something was floating in the void waiting for a host PC but in context to the text of the incident I don't really see how that's a logical conclusion. The incident was about a secondary or true self within a person that can be accessed through the hemispherical bridge. Which is sort of exactly what we see here. It's also generally how it works IRL, split-brain is a fairly well researched topic for what it is.

Which is all to say I think this one is fairly literal. Herr Schmidt isn't a psychic gateway to Freddy but that's not to say I don't think these things are related. I very much do but I think it's foreshadowing and metaphor rather than literally the same thing. But of course I think that because I've been talking about this idea of a homunculus JMJ for a bit. You can read about it in an essay entitled JMJ: Frankenstein; or, the Modem Prometheus. It's a short read for my standards and my favourite pun of all my essays, so check it out. The dream is a little more likely to be a psychic event but it's also pretty literal for a dream as the imagery goes so there isn't much to say on it.

A very fun incident all around. As mentioned the main subject matter of callosal syndrome (split-brain) is a very real phenomena. I'm not going to get too into it but if it's something you want to dig into I'd suggest looking into the research of Michael Gazzaniga as well as Roger Sperry. The latter won a Nobel Prize for their work on this too.

I don't have much to say on the last to sections. Both conversations Sam has with Alice and Celia, respectively, are pretty explicit. Although Sam's mention of Alice being controlling does give us some insight into a likely reason they broke up. He's also very right that Alice has made a pretty quick turn around on all this and is now actively working against it despite not buying it at all.

Then it was something about a Marvin and Jason, I think?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Incident/CAT#R#DPHW Master Sheet and Terminology Sheet

DPHW Theory: 4488 sounds about right. Not a load to say on that one IMO.

CAT# Theory: 13 is somewhat interesting from the Person/Place/Object theory. Mostly because it's another that's a really big stretch and also doesn't help anyone know anything. There wasn't really anything out of the ordinary here as far as people and objects go, and in either case flagging that doesn't really impart any useful context. So it's just another one of those largely redundant data points.

R# Theory: Another old letter by an old man at BC. Love to see the consistency as it lines up very well with my ideas here.

Header talk: Experiment (Brain) -/- Imprisonment (Existential) is a somewhat interesting crosslink assuming it's correctly filed. Your second self being literally imprisoned in your head at all times is pretty wild.

[sarahsmi13s]

💜 Get To Know Your Moots 💜

thank you @desert-fern and @startrekfangirl2233 for the tags!

everything under the cut because i yap

What’s the origin of your blog title?

my og username used to be part of my email when I first made this blog, but after coming back I changed it to what it is now to match all of my other social platforms! Sarah Smiles by P!aTD is one of the only songs that has my name in it and one of my friends in middle school mentioned something about it one day and it just kinda stuck!

OTP(s) + ship names

I'm not really a huge canon/canon shipper unless they were already together, just never has really been my thing until sorta recently. I've written some Hangman/Rooster (hangster) in TGM. Buck/Eddie (Buddie) in 911, the writers just better not fuck it up. I did ship Buck/Tommy (Tevan) since they were canon, but that storyline is over now so they're just a little moment but not something I'm holding out hope for lol. I'm also a Lucy/Tim (Chenford) in The Rookie, and I hope the writers can bring that couple back and do it better. Astarion/Gale (Bloodweave) in Baldur's Gate 3. Shadowheart/Lae'zel (Shadow'zel) also bg3. and Wyll/Karlach (Wyllach) -- all of theses ships are canon to me if my tav/durge isn't interfering but then I have a set up for that don't worry 😂

Favourite Colour

I am a big purple girlie -- all hues but I have preferences towards lavender, royal purple, and the bluer shades! have been since I was little! but I love greens too, sage and forest are my go to's. but I also adore a good yellow! I rarely come across a color I don't like, if I'm completely honest. all colors are great, they just sometimes get grouped wrong

Favourite Game

as mentioned above, I have been playing Baldur's Gate 3 a lot. only 1 completed play through (though I held out at the epilogue party bc I couldn't say goodbye just yet and I did start a new run with that tav for fanfic purposes and cried remaking her) and I have about 4 others (3 tavs and 1 dark urge). and you can ask the servers I'm in... I can't shut up about them I'm also sort of getting into the sims, mainly just to build and have casual fun. and I'm looking forward to getting into dragon age (thanks to @horseshoegirl -- lucky has gotten me hooked). I also love the resident evil games though I haven't played them. and then the long list of games from my childhood that I watched Markiplier and JackSepticEye play. I also love a good card/board game

Song stuck in your head

currently it's "Would You Fall in Love with Me Again" from Epic: The Musical -- it won't leave

Weirdest habit/trait

um in Baldur's Gate, i have to organize the camp chest by putting things in designated boxes. bc I loot everything 😭 and I have so much food that I'm glad doesn't go bad in game because I've brought raw meat and veggies from act 1 all the way into act 3. outside of that, I don't know -- I assume by organization habits may translate? but I don't really know

Hobbies

writing, the occasional reading, playing video games, cooking when I have the things I want to cook available, bugging my mom, annoying my friends on the internet (only half joking 😂)

If you work, what’s your profession?

currently not working, but I have an associates in law enforcement, though I don't know what I would with it at this point in my life. it just doesn't feel like me anymore

If you could have ANY job, what would it be?

there's so many things: if I could find just get a grip, and build my own story, I would love to actually write a book (though I'd need to mature a little more in my skills I think). voice acting has been a big aspiration as of late as well, I blame this in on bg3 and the absolutely brilliant work done by the VAs on that work

Something you’re good at

oh jeez making me be nice to myself... I'd like to say I'm a good writer, all of my moots are (this is a fact and I will fight them on this) I have a lot a room to grow, but who doesn't? I do like to think I'm a pretty good cheerleader for my friends (I feel like I've been slacking lately though) and I'd also like to think I'm good at character analysis, and tearing apart fan fiction like I'm an English teacher

Something you’re bad at

a lot but if I had to pick, maybe like sticking to routines? which is weird, because I like having them, but they are very hard to change so I always revert back to before

Something you love

my friends (online and irl), family, writing and indulging in my friends story ideas to help them as best I can, video games (I'm a whore for story driven ones), food, music, YouTube, movies/tv -- I could keep going but I'd be here all day

Something you could talk about for hours off the cuff

baldur's gate 3, 911, the rookie, some bits of the mcu (phase 1 to early phase 4), my fanfics and ocs, things I just blab to my mother about that I won't say here because it's a long list

Something you hate

my feet always being fucking cold and my inability to finish a fic atm <- there's more but again... we'd be here all day and this is my main issue other than my brain on occasion

Something you collect

fanfic ideas (my wheel is collecting drinks on tab), bg3 tavs (I'm playing through every romance and writing fics for it -- but after that I'm not stopping so tavs galore), and random shit I probably don't need

Something you forgot

a lot of stuff I learned in math, I was good at it at the time, but now? I don't remember the fancy equations. and until now, to move the little "today" magnet on my calendar

Love language?

all of them, honestly, though I'm more of a gift giver than a gift receiver. touch (gimme cuddles, hand holding, kisses, hugs -- all of it), quality time (we could literally sit in silence doing our own thing and it's great), and words of affirmation (I just really need verbal reminders some times alright? my brain is loud) are the big 3

Favourite movie/show

right now? probably 911 and the Rookie but NCIS and pre-season 11 Criminal Minds are a love of mine (nothing wrong with the newer stuff, I just have feelings connected to the early stuff). also I miss Adventure Time and Gravity Falls. movie wise: movies Glen Powell is in, but that's a given. Marvel movies (again phase 1 to early phase 4 -- haven't watched a lot of the new stuff yet) and when I was kid, I scratched the disc for Finding Nemo because I watched it so much

Favourite food

I'm pretty picky, so a lot of my favs are basic. but since I've started cooking things myself/helped cook -- I've ventured out more. but fajita quesadillas (steak and chicken), pizza (rolls and bagel bites included), grilled cheese, turkey and cheese sandwiches are generally safe options. then I've recently tried salmon, so good. and chicken and dumplings in my current go to cold weather food.

Favourite animal

outside of your classic pets (dog, cat, bunnies, bird, fish): foxes, wolves, otters, highland cows, ball pythons, probably more that I can't think of. (the fictional owl bear, they're cute don't judge me)

What were you like as a child?

I think I was relatively normal as a kid. went to like a "headstart" preschool which helped me be academically ahead, I guess? I'm not really sure, but I was a relatively smart kid and that preschool helped with that I think. I played sports, softball and basketball mainly. I loved (and still love) swimming. I played pretend a lot, which maybe is why I love writing so much. relatively well behaved, dropped a few "f bombs" though (it was like twice and my sisters bring it up still). and like I mentioned before, religiously watched Finding Nemo -- my mom would but it on because it was the only thing that would keep me occupied. the wiggles were another big one (I was hyperfixating, but no one knew it yet)

Favourite school subject

going off high school: math probably, I was good at it. I liked science a lot too. history was fun in high school -- mainly because of the teacher (she dressed up). English (lit) was okay, I just didn't like being told what to read and the teachers (8th and 11th grade) analysis was always bullshit out of the lesson plan and if you had something different it was just flat-out wrong and didn't even let you explore your own train of thought -- just told you that you were wrong with no explanation. (my 7th, 9th and 10th grade teachers were great though loved them)

Least favorite subject

adv physical science -- teacher got sick, not her fault but she was out for the last half of the years and it really hurt our grades for a bit because the regular phys-sci teacher wasn't grading us right, and it left a bad taste in my mouth for pays-sci English (lang) -- I write how I talk, which I know isn't really correct, but I just, it felt like it didn't make sense they way she taught it. (most of my subject issues are literally just me with grudges against the teacher bc they weren't helpful)

What’s your best character trait

I feel like I'm a kind person, or at least I do my damnedest to be. I try to be as helpful as I can when in positions to do so. I'm always trying to make sure that I'm mindful of others. I put my all into things, I'm very passionate. I listen and give advice when I can. I'd like to think I'm funny.

What’s your worst character trait (I get a little deep... sorry 😅)

I'm sure you noticed above, I'm very unsure of how people actually perceive me so it causes a lot of "I think" or "I'd like to think" statements. I'm often very in my head, and I care a lot about how others feel/think about me -- which I know isn't inherently bad, but it's not very good either. I beat myself up a lot, and I can get myself in really not nice headspaces. I also tend to bottle up my feelings, which isn't fair to me or others that may want to help -- but I don't want them to feel like it's their fault even though it's really not and I don't want them to feel like I'm trying to get them fix me or that I'm just fishing for validation (no one that I'm friends with has ever said this or made me feel that way, it's entirely my own head). but I preach communication, but I lack the practice in it because I'm scared to upset people -- I'm just a mess 😅

If you could change any detail of your job right now, what would it be?

probably the fact I don't have one 😂 it's a pretty easy fix though

If you could travel through time, who would you most like to meet?

oh that's a tough one -- some of them, there's a language barrier. others, I would end up screwing over the timeline with. so maybe like, just going back in time and talking with my pop who died when I was little, just so I can have that little window of extra time with him

Recommend one of your favorite fanfics! I have been an awful reader lately, fandom jumping is hard. I'm behind on everything but I've been privy to so much background stuff with my amazing friends! and I will tag their work (finished and wips) and please check out the one shots and other works that these people have done as well you won't regret it

Top Gun

Damn Those Dog Tags by @horseshoegirl - it is a finished work, but I haven't finished reading it. I highly recommend that you check it out if you haven't because Lucky poured her heart and soul into this and it is just a beautiful piece!

Set Me Alight by @horseshoegirl - a work in progress and i have loved being a part of the process in seeing this come to life as she writes this! i highly recommend this as well!

You Are My Soulmate by @startrekfangirl2233-writes - a work in progress. i believe this is the first thing a read of star's before we actually talked! a lot of ups and downs in this piece! i recommend giving it a shot

star has so many other yet to debut pieces, and I love them all so be on the lookout for them!

A Gun Amongst Daggers by @desert-fern - a finished piece, but again, I haven't finished reading it. another one I was lucky to witness the process of and I adored it all! please go show it some love fern really put her all into it

Anatomy of an Arsonist by @desert-fern - a work in progress and I have loved being a part of watching this story evolve and grow. she's put so much love and detail into this, I highly recommend

You Catch S.W.A.T Officers with... Muffins? by @desert-fern - a cute little one-shot with Nix that is just absolutely adorable and sweet, if you need a feel good this is where you go!

Anything by @topguncortez , @sebsxphia , @roosterforme , @teacupsandtopgun and so many others are highly recommend as well. And again, please go show anyone tagged here some love on their works if they are your style! they all have so much work that I couldn't possibly but it all down, and search out for smaller pages too -- they're deserving of love too 🫶🏻

Baldur's Gate 3

there are so many that've just been reading through on the search page so I'll be tagging the accounts I see a lot!

@moonselune

@astarionancuntnin

@reverieblondie

We the Stolen by @fangbanger3000 (only on ao3) - I adore this story, it's so captivating and interesting! a definitely rec if you're looking for something unique (please please please! ready the warnings before proceeding)

there are so so so many others if you're a bg3 girlie (gender neutral) give the tags a scroll, you won't regret it

911

@achilles-rage -- has plus!size and race inclusive readers! please please give them a look if you're needing a little love

@megalony -- all of their 911 pieces are very emotional and I think capture the characters in a unique way that is still true to them!

~~~~~

no pressure tags: @horseshoegirl @teacupsandtopgun @sebsxphia @achilles-rage @lovinglyeternal @bradleybeachbabe and anyone that wants to join!

[oathkeeper-of-tarth]

Apologies for this angsty question, but do you have any thoughts about the route where Shadowheart kills Aylin? Like, do you think amidst all the pain a thought crossed her mind where she realized she might see Isobel again? Whenever I hear the delivery of the "There it is. True death, at last" line I always sensed a sort of...dark relief that while Shar unfortunately won, at least there's a chance that someone might be waiting for her.

No apologies necessary, I'm a firm believer angst and tragedy are an important and crucial part of the story. I also think that without the possibility of all the horrible and dark outcomes for these two, the beautiful reunion and everything around it wouldn't be so incredibly impactful.

I've watched that particular animation a bunch of times and what always gets me is how Aylin smiles when facing down that spear, the one thing in this world that can actually kill her, before visibly bracing with a frown.

And then she almost walks into the spear? I read that whole bit as a proud "bravely dying on her feet" sort of thing, as close to going out on her own terms as she is getting in this dismal place. There's also the killer line she has about Shar:

Why does she fear truth more than I fear death?

Re: "true death, at last" there's two deliveries of that line depending on if you're Origin Shadowheart or not, even though the words are the exact same. So... here they are, I guess.

There it is. True death, at last. You are Shar's child after all. And I am... I am...

Daggers driven into my heart, especially at how she just barely fails to finish the "I am..." when we know how readily and gladly and with how much well-earned pride she proclaims who she is, in a kinder timeline in which she gets a chance to. I hate the low blow of her dying as "Nightsong" instead of "Dame Aylin" as much as she does.

I do also read some sort of relief in her delivery of that line, yeah. Along with the idea that while yes, this is absolutely a defeat upon this particular battlefield on Shar and Selûne's long list of them, and while foul Shar will certainly be crowing her triumph and her shadows will be capering merrily at the rise of her new Chosen, at least the "cold chapter" as she calls it is over for Aylin. Because for all her spite and proud defiance and insistence on how a century is nothing in the life of an immortal, and all of her gloriously undefeated posturing... and I mean, look at that smirk (if you're not Shar's almost-Chosen with her special spear of death):

and that goading rage:

At least a part of this very visibly is posturing, which you can see as soon as you tell Aylin you're not a Sharran and her demeanour immediately shifts. And then she looks at you with those big soulful eyes and I just clutch feebly at my chest? Because yes, to quote Isobel, Aylin is a formidable woman, but no one could survive such horrors unscathed. Every time I try to really imagine and think of the sheer scope of it and everything her imprisonment entailed, it just boggles the mind, it's so extreme. Seeing her persevere like that in that darkness, seeing her so proud and regal in her filth and rags is just... deeply, deeply impressive (and so this avenue in which it is all cut so short and we never see her beyond this is extra painful, to me).

(This all brings to mind that one regretful Dark Justiciar, one of my favourites from the collection of scattered Act 2 written material.)

But back to your ask, adding the element of "someone waiting for me" is something I can absolutely see (if we don't get into all the "what actually happened with Isobel's soul" weeds, or assume, at least, Aylin never did). It also makes it potentially awful because of the timing of Isobel's resurrection - but then, Aylin dying causes Isobel to die as well when her spell fails, so I guess the reunion, if Selûne manages to properly claim both souls (PLEASE @ GODS), is imminent. A much sadder one, to be sure, than our beloved "I dreamt every night that you'd come back to me. That somehow it was all a nightmare dawn would undo." But small mercies, I guess, in a very dark timeline.

I'll leave it at that for this grim bit of afternoon rumination.

[adhd-merlin]

Hey I heard you wanna yap so I'm here to talk Arthuriana books ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ I've got a whole spreadsheet but I've only recently started reading 21st century ones, including Bliss & Blunder which is currently my highest ranked out of the bunch but I know it's gonna be usurped by the one I'm currently reading - The Bright Sword by Lev Grossman. If you can handle long books (almost 700 pages) then you have to read it, it's so well written and goes into the more neglected knights like Bedivere and Palomides (and as with all modern stuff some of the knights get to be gay as a treat). I'm still only 1/4 of the way through but if it stays as good as it's been so far then oh boy. Anyways let me know what your favourite 21st Arthuriana is!

Yaaay yapping time <3

Ooh I can’t believe you’ve got a spreadsheet, haha. I’m fascinated by you spreadsheet people! (I’m not a spreadsheet kind of person, I’m a “I’ll write a random note on my phone that I’ll soon forget about… unless I remember” kind of person).

thank you for the rec!! Imma be honest I don’t think I can handle long books right now, because I’m struggling with concentration, but it sounds interesting! I’ll add it to my wish list in case I feel inspired to read it in future (I use the app Bookshelf to keep track of books read/to read, though there’s not much to keep track of these days lol. I like it because it’s super basic; I don’t even think you need to create an account? Can’t remember. But I can’t be bothered with Goodreads anymore.)

Anyways let me know what your favourite 21st Arthuriana is!

Bliss & Blunder is the only modern one I’ve read actually! I haven’t read many Arthuriana books? I’ve read about Arthuriana texts/adaptations more than I’ve read any actual texts lol. I like hearing about all the lore! But I love thinking/reading about adaptations in general, I think the process itself is so interesting? Like, what elements of a story one chooses to focus on or to discard; what makes a character… well, themselves. If you put Lancelot in the 21st century, what would he be like? How much can you change a story and still recognise it as the same? I find it fascinating to think about!* And obviously Arthurian texts have been inspiring so many people over the centuries across different media, so there’s a lot to explore in that sense.

I would like to read some of the “source” texts at some point, though they are a bit daunting. I gave Le Morte d'Arthur a try and abandoned it quite soon, but I’d like to dip my toes in it again, read some select chapters perhaps. I’d also like to read The Knight of the Cart because Lancelot is such an interesting character.

In terms of modern adaptations (as in, written in modern times), I would like to check out The Once and Future King (the Ill Made Knight in particular, don’t think I could read all the books)—I’ve read contrasting opinions on T.H. White’s work but it’s had a great influence on subsequent adaptations (I think?) that I want to see what all the fuss is about. And I love the whole love triangle drama. An affair so messy we’re still talking about it centuries later? I’m so here for it.

I’ve read a couple of random quotes from Steinbeck’s The Acts of King Arthur and His Noble Knights that made me go “oh I should check this out!”, so that it also on my radar. (Have you read it? If so, what did you think of it?)

*I was in the Sherlock fandom for a while and that’s one of the things I enjoyed about it—all the different adaptations that existed about the same source material. And I don’t even care about Conan Doyle’s stories that much (lol sorry Arthur) so it really was mainly about the adaptations for me. I was studying Russian at uni at the time, so I checked out the “classic” Soviet Sherlock Holmes series, and also the Russian TV adaptation that came out in 2013. I greatly enjoyed the latter because of the way it played with and subverted elements of the original canon—it was great fun! Maybe my favourite Sherlock Holmes adaptation. But Vitaly Solomin's Watson ("Soviet" Watson) has a special place in my heart, he was so cute. Did you know there's a genderbent Holmes & Watson Russian adaptation? And they get to crossdress to get into a gentleman's club. Fascinating. I also think Jonny Lee Miller was great in Elementary, though I’m not a big fan of the procedural format. I did abandon that show after series… three, I think? but I still think he made an interesting Sherlock Holmes. His acting was probably wasted on that series to be honest!)

[crispy-kitten-princess]

If i ever were able to list all the things i dislike in Magisterium series, this post would've been endless. Instead, I'd mention smth i love so much that it makes me re-read the series for the fifth time and gives me inspiration for new drawings and playlists

The first one is aesthetic. I don't think I've ever read a YA book with the death and necromancy as the main lore theme. Also, the first book in series is so sweet and innocent compared to the fourth I can't believe it lol. Corpses. So gothic. So edgy. Love it

The second is very similar to the first - chaos magic. We come across elemental magic in all sorts of media, but they don't usually have the 5th element, or if they have it's more likely to be electricity or smth. Not ACTUAL NECROMANCY omfg... I love it. Also Makars being able to manipulate not only chaos (the void itself) but the soul.... Cute

So next. The main character ofc. Callum Hunt. What can I say he is such a cinnamon roll hating himself for what he is not. Screaming, crying, throwing up. I can feel his pain with every fiber of my soul he's so relatable. He is a type of chaotic neutral main character which is rare I guess, and at the same time he doesn't act like a total jerk and piece of shit. Can't name some other like him, idk. He's sweet but also edgy. His self-confidence is below the surface of the earth. He's just like me frfr my poor little meow meow. Also he is disabled and it influences the events of the book. Sometimes. Cool, representative. Not a disabled person myself but can appreciate it

Another reason for me to love the series is the changing of Call's secrets idk how to call this. The structure of his character lore. His secrets and abilities, they're layered.. you know... And every book one by one uncovers these layers: 1 - he uncovers that he is the reincarnation of Constantine. 2 - he gets his powers (which made Constantine evil at the first place). 3 - he learns more about Constantine's family, and the whole world finds out that he "is" the Enemy of Death. 4 - omg how much he uncovers here lol i can't. May be my favourite book thanks to its maaad vibe. Everything he learns here makes him closer and closer to Constantine. 5 - i know that most of the fandom thinks it was stupid to make Constantine himself a reincarnated thousand-years-old evil Makar. And i may agree. But in the moment of reading this it was so impactful for me idk why.... I literally cried idk!!! Lol. Love the moment where Call opens his memory to help his friends to fight wolves or smth, and PASSES OUT. KING. So, the other secret is uncovered here. Everything he learns makes him understand Constantine's/Maugris's motives, but he never ever becomes anything like them nor wishes to follow their path. Pretty symbolic and meaningful

Upd. SOME MOMENTS ARE FREAKING HILARIOUS

So what can I say? Every series has it's weak and strong points. Some of them become classic literature, some are forgotten in the abyss of YA books. I understand why Magisterium's place is with the second type of series, and it's not even saddens me anymore (we're so underground teehee). But i see many posts where the series is shitted over, and not much of posts appreciating the things that we actually love in it. Aren't they the reason you started and finished it sometime? So I'm here spreading positivity! And also because I'm so tired of being a fan of this shit so i tried to acknowledge all that i love, and why am i here in the first place

I think it's all for now, maybe I'll come with more ideas later

Fandom are you alive? Heh am I a Call kinnie to the point that i become necromancer?...

P.S. sometimes i think I'm so cringe to be periodically obsessed with this STUPID POOR-WRITTEN CHILDISH BOOK ABANDONED EVEN BY IT'S OWN CREATORS BUT I CAN'T HELP IT...... AND THE WORST THING IS THAT I DIDN'T EVEN READ IT IN MY EARLY TEENS (except the 1 which i read when i was around 13. Read it twice in one week so maybe that's the moment my brain was damaged) I READ IT WHEN I WAS 16 ALREADY aaarrrhh I'm so cringe. Why obsession why why why why why why i hate this but this is literally the only book which makes me cry and scream and feel every fucking time i re-read it even when i know EVERYTHING THAT'S GONNA HAPPEN LITERALLY EVERYTHING reading it all again for the 6th time FOR GODDESS SAKE WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME

[vimesbootstheory]

Books of 2024

I've got a couple of days left in '24 but neither of the books I'm set to finish by the end of Tuesday are going to be either top 10 or bottom 10 material so I'm going to make this post now.

I read 185 books this year (maybe a couple more by Tuesday's end). I thought I'd list my top 10 favourites and my bottom 10 most disappointing. Not bottom 10 least favourite/worst, because I read a fair number of books this year that I knew would be bad, gag picks, things like that.

(ALTHOUGH shout out to Inferno by Dan Brown by being the actual worst book I read this year, I knew it would be bad because it's fucking Dan Brown and even with those basement-level expectations it still managed to piss me the fuck off. Fuck that book, seriously.)

Also, re-reads were not allowed on this list. I re-read Guards! Guards! and One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest this year and they were both still as incredible as the first time I read them, but they don't get consideration here.

Top 10 Favourite Reads

10 - The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley -- I know what she did. Fucking compelling as hell book, though.

9 - Circe by Madeline Miller -- Beautifully written. Shame about the legacy of endless Greek myth retellings, but it doesn't take away from this.

8 - Convenience Store Woman by Sayaka Murata -- Just finished this yesterday, loved it! Keiko's perspective on the world and people's expectations is too real.

7 - Imposter Syndrome by Kathy Wang -- So fun. Stylish yet grounded, honestly the closest I got this year to un-put-down-able.

6 - The Hour of the Star by Clarice Lispector -- You don't HAVE to be a writer to want to cradle and nurture this book, but I think it helps.

5 - Friday Black by Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah -- My favourite of the short story collections I read this year. Every single story grabs you by the throat.

4 - NOS4A2 by Joe Hill -- I'm sure he's tired of the comparison, but I feel like this is everything I want a Stephen King book to be, but isn't. It's Stephen King, but with a good editor and compelling ladies!

3 - Speaker for the Dead by Orson Scott Card -- It is so annoying to me how good this is. Fuck OSC, but fuck him even more for this being so good.

2 - Roadside Picnic by Arkady and Boris Strugatsky -- Apparently I love books about exploring mysterious zones with vague worldbuilding?? Because...

1 - Annihilation by Jeff VanderMeer -- ... this trend nabbed the top 2 spots for me this year. GIVE ME ALL THE MYSTERIOUS ZONES.

Top 10 Most Disappointing Reads

10 - Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins -- What the hell happened here? This was a mess. The plot was awkwardly paced, the games felt gimmicky, just... bad.

9 - My Grandmother Asked Me To Tell You She's Sorry by Fredrik Backman -- Relentlessly twee. Miss me with all these HP references, too.

8 - The Vegetarian by Han Kang -- Very ???, but not in a fun way. Everyone's acting like it's their first day being a human.

7 - Behind Closed Doors by B.A. Paris -- Reads like something you'd pick up off a shelf in a grocery store or dollar store at random. Very amateurish prose.

6 - Demon Theory by Stephen Graham Jones -- This was heartbreaking because I've been pumped for years to get into SGJ, but this? Nah. The movie-pitch-as-novel schtick did not work for me at all, and after the first "movie" I quickly got lost.

5 - The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet by Becky Chambers -- Its only saving grace was being an easy read. Which alien do I have to fuck around here for some conflict and a gd plot? I guess "cozy scifi" is not for me.

4 - Peace by Gene Wolfe -- I was ready for this to be over about halfway through. What on earth. I also read Ziggurat this year, though, and that was good.

3 - The Yiddish Policemen's Union by Michael Chabon -- My second chance for Chabon, and unfortunately I think he's just not for me.

2 - On a Pale Horse by Piers Anthony -- The onslaught of misogyny, holy shit. Just read Pratchett's Mort, it's all of this, but done way, way better.

1 - Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal by Christopher Moore -- This was so fucking obnoxious. Please love yourself and don't read this. Don't be like me and finish everything you start. Why do I do this.

[musashi]

wendy i listened to navi's love song. idk if this goes in the ask box or not but since i sent the original request in ur ask box i'll just put my thoughts here too lol. anyway

THIS IS SO FIRE WHATTTTT

notes:

i still haven't played ocarina of time lmao but navi seems so cool and now i really want to play ocarina of time

is deku tree really pronounced like that???? i thought it was deh-ku not dee-ku

i absolutely LOVE how this sounds it's got this certain vibe to it that reminds me a lot of the music that made up 90% of my taste a couple years ago. even though i've never heard this song before it makes me feel nostalgic

obsessed with the lyrics. 'wipe my liquid eyes bite my lip say i'm cool with it' which then flips to 'wipe my molten eyes make a fist and be cruel with it.' i am certain that this hits even harder knowing what's going on in the actual game but as written word it's already peak

i feel like in another universe i heard this song and loved it more than anything

OHHHH MY GODDDD LINK SHOOT THIS THING IN ITS EYEEEAAAAEEEEEAAAE

...anyway if you have more songs that are similar i will listen to them

you can put anything in my ask box. its quick, easy, and free!

i wish navi was this cool in oot but sadly there isn't a lot of deep characterization in early zelda. the manga fleshes her out a lot tho! and she was always intended to have a crush on link so this song is an exploration of what that sounds like

zelda pronunciation largely doesn't matter because the games never had voice acting before 2017. in botw they say deeku but i think that's stupid as fuck so i don't.

LISTEN TO MORE FREE PARKING

that is my favourite set of lyrics in the whole song. again the game doesn't really help it but navi is kinda supposed to be like tinkerbell. there's a lot of 1:1 peter pan in oot especially.

OH MY GOD LINK SHOOT THIS THING IN ITS EYEEEEEYEYEEEEEYEEEEEEAAAHAHAAAAAA

my favourite free parking songs beside this one are wendy x dipper, laika come home, nintendo kids (i think they changed the title to smash kids or something? whatever listen to all of wii salute u), & germany. but listen to all of them. they're all good

[prettyboybuckley]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

tagged by @saybiwithme @bi-buckrights @zainclaw

How many works do you have on ao3?

160

What's your total ao3 word count?

1,070,239

What fandoms do you write for?

I've mostly written for 9-1-1, though I started off with Shameless (6 fics) and I have written some for Teen Wolf (5 fics). There's one 9-1-1 crossover with Schitt's Creek.

Top five fics by kudos:

parents always yelling (telling us to get our acts together)

i just want something to hold on to (and a little of that human touch)

I will come to you (even in my sleep)

open up again (i believe in second chances)

exes and the oh's

Do you respond to comments?

Always, even if it takes me months. I actually just caught up again (there's still a bunch to go, but right now the oldest is 17 days ago instead of 250 days...). It's just a rule I have for myself, and even with the backlog I've kept it up so far, so I'm not going to stop doing it now.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I'm not a big fan of angsty endings, I generally try to at least make it a hopeful ending or, in the case of the college au, use an epilogue to fix things.

But I guess sunny skies & summer highs qualifies as an angsty ending simply because of the cliffhanger (and yes, there is still going to be a continuation, I'm working on it 🙈).

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Choosing one out of 160 is really hard, but I think tell me, will you stay or will you run away is definitely one that deserves a mention here, because it already has a happy ending and then the epilogue just makes it even better 🥰

Do you get hate on fics?

Not commented on the fic itself, no. I've had some people talk shit about my fics on twitter, though, and not even vaguely but calling me by (user)name.

Do you write smut?

Is grass green? Yeah, I write smut 🤭 Thanks to two times kinktober, I have 95 explicit fics, by far the most used rating for my fics.

Craziest crossover:

let's have some fun tonight is my 9-1-1/Schitt's Creek crossover fic for 9-1-1 Rarepair Week, and my only crossover fic

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

My head over feet Buddie valentine's two-parter got posted as one chapter in Wattpad work with over 30 fics once. Filed a DMCA and Wattpad took it down within two hours.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Two of my fics have been translated into Russian afaik, one on ao3 and one on Ficbook

Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Nope. It may be a nice challenge for the future? Not sure who I'd do it with.

All time favourite ship?

Gotta go for Buddie on that one, lol. Especially if you look at my writing history. But I often tend to hyperfixate on one ship at a time (current reading obsession is McDanno)

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Buck's POV of if love is art then you might be my masterpiece. I really want to, but at this point it's been two years since the original so I don't know if it'd be worth it either. (I know not everyone was happy about how I ended it, but I doubt any of them are still waiting for more). Writing a different POV of the same fic takes an amount of planning that my brain just really struggles with. And I could pick up where the last chapter (before the epilogue) picks up, but I think that way there would be some crucial information about Buck missing.

What are your writing strengths?

I've been told quite a lot of times that I am good at keeping characters, well, in character, even when putting them in partial or complete AU's. Of course, what is in character or not is subjective, but I do always challenge myself to work as much of the canon backstory and personality into who they are in the AU as possible.

And I like to think I'm pretty good at writing smut.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I'm terrible at pacing, which multiple of my long fics prove. It'll be drawn out first and then suddenly rushing. And being ESL I do struggle with things like sentence structure and grammar pretty regularly still.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

As long as there is some kind of translation provided somewhere I like it, but I'm not so quick to use it myself. Not beyond a few Spanish words here and there (generally pet names between Eddie and his family we've seen on the show or the occasional curse word when I feel it fits better than an English one, but I usually need to employ help from Spanish-speaking friends for those).

First fandom you wrote in?

Shameless! I binged that right before I started 9-1-1 and combined with the creative writing minor I was doing, it was actually what got me back into writing in general and what made me write my first ever fic.

Favorite fic you've written?

My in your arms i feel safe-series (which I always lovingly refer to as the ace kink fic) is definitely one of my favorites simply because of how personal it is to me and for the reason behind me writing it in the first place.

Other strong contenders are i would've loved you forever (it's never enough but i wanted it to be) and i'm begging you, come home to me (Teen Wolf, Thiam)

tagging @monsterrae1 @rogerzsteven @loserdiaz @watchyourbuck

[raayllum]

Callum 🤝 Stoick

“For you, my dear, anything.”

Everyone loves to draw comparisons between Callum and Hiccup (when they’re pretty fundamentally different people beyond the obvious surface level similarities) but sleep on this comparison! Love it

Gonna go on a deep dive cause Hiccup is one of my favourite characters ever but I've never written meta about him so

In some ways, Hiccup and Callum are similar - especially in terms of how they present. They're both goofy, more than a little awkward, deeply curious and compassionate, extremely loyal once you've earned/have their loyalty, a bit flighty and sometimes focused too much on the big picture in lieu of missing the little things. They both grew up feeling like the wrong fit for their environment/culture and it takes bonding with a mysterious, dangerous enemy and subsequent life changing adventure for them to start figuring out where they belong (and how). I think they'd get along splendidly and would absolutely show off flying tricks

However, they are also radically different, mostly because Hiccup is far more rebellious (and particularly in early HTTYD1) far more selfish than Callum is.

Due to a vicious cycle of "I want to prove myself to the village" -> "I mess up" -> "Village is annoyed by me" and a lack of other tangible options of places and circumstances to go into, Hiccup is about as bullheaded as it gets. Even before he meets Toothless, he's not super concerned about being a Viking according to his people's standards, and we don't know if he actually tried at being a traditional Viking very hard before he switched to machinery and inventing (I've also leaned towards not, but that's up for interpretation). He simply wants them to recognize that he can be a Viking, too, by his own standards - and in some ways better and more effectively than they can because he's using his smarts and not just his ('nonexistent') brawn. He's effectively beholden to no one but himself, especially since his relationship with his father is so strained and Gobber does his best, but is understandably not a perfect substitute / cannot be everything a 15 year old boy needs or wants to have socially. This is also why Stoic's scoldings are so ineffective, because pre-Toothless Hiccup doesn't really care that much if he royally mucks things up for the Village time and time again if it's in pursuit of praise/recognition - which is not entirely unreasonable (we all want attention/positive reinforcement) particularly for a teenager, but it is short sighted and immature.

Then he meets Toothless, and learns 1) how to put something and someone else heavily above his own wants & needs, and 2) how to contribute to the village in a way that would be beneficial for everyone, not just the people (beginning of the movie)/himself, or for the dragons/himself (when he was planning to run away), but for all of them, irregardless of himself. This journey is ultimately what's culminated in the third movie by finally living up to his father ("How do you become someone that great, that brave, that selfless?") by willing to do with Toothless what Stoic was willing to do with him: to let him go, so that he'd be Safe. The first thing Hiccup ever did, that set him on an entirely new path after all, was to set a dragon free. I always thought it was very fitting that was his final act as well.

And it's this journey from selfish slightly sarcastic but intelligent, sympathetically immature teenager to a wiser, selfless, less independent but more reliable adult, aided by the events of the films, the memory/inspiration of his father, everything about Toothless and his love/support of Hiccup, and Astrid being about as devoted to Berk as it gets (which is absolutely something Hiccup needs) that allows him to be a great Chief. He's able to put the greater good of his family and people above what he may personally want in the short term ("I was so busy thinking about the world that I wanted, I didn't think about what you needed") to prioritize his goals in the long term ("And we'll guard the secret until the time comes that dragons can return in peace").

And due to all of this, Callum starts out in a fundamentally different place, because he always has an internal and externally imposed responsibility from the start: Ezran. "Take care of your brother," are Harrow's final, parting words to him, after all, and we see Callum take this with him throughout the series, whether it's trying to be assassinated in Ezran's place, promising to return and help him once Zym is brought home, or rushing to defend him when he thinks there's another plot against the king. This is also where we see Callum's selective loyalty creep in. While Callum would make a great general due to his tactician skills and ability to think ahead, he is ultimately too reckless and obsessive to make a good king - or in the Hiccup comparison, Chief. Although both are leadership roles, having Ezran / others there to temper him occasionally as a general is crucial - he needs that safety net (or someone to tell him to keep his eyes on the road) which him being the final authority on the throne would not provide ("I may be queen but even I can't stop those two when they've set their minds on something") that not being on the throne can marginally provide. This is also one of the reasons why I don't think either Callum or Rayla are really suited to a long term life at court / as royalty, but post for another day <3

Callum also has more of a temper and more of a nasty temper toward his loved ones as well that Hiccup really doesn't have a shred of - he'll be sarcastic and a bit snippy but he'll never aim for the jugular, y'know? (Hiccup is also more marginally prone to self blame probably because he's grown up enough to take full responsibility for his actions after a childhood of mostly shirking/dismissing them, but like side tangent)

So like Callum's consistent sense of responsibility keeps him tempered and more mild mannered and less rebellious (and him and Harrow have a much better relationship than pre-HTTYD1 Hiccup and Stoick, which absolutely helps; each may have resembled each other more in HTTYD2 esque dynamic if Harrow had lived to see Callum mature / grow into himself a bit more) but also leaves him far more selectively loyal / focused on his own bubble most of the time.

Like Hiccup is just loyal enough (aided by Astrid) to his People to like be able to do the ins and outs and enjoy it overall? And I've never gotten the same sense from Callum at any point in the series (which "I'm beholden to my inner circle, not some silly kingdom" - thank you TOX). And I do think the way Callum would want to change the world is more magic based - teaching other people how to connect and harness magic - is more in line for him overall but again: post for another day (and we'll have to see where canon goes). Because of Toothless, Hiccup's bubble expands to Astrid and the gang and his father, fully, and stays expanded; Toothless gave him the family & support he needed to no longer need Toothless to stay in the same manner. For Callum, his bubble is Ezran, expands to Rayla as well over the course of arc 1 at first because of Ezran and because of their own bond - and it doesn't really expand with the same intensity to basically anyone else (see Callum being worried, sure, about Soren in 4x06/4x07 but also a lot more focused in general in how Soren's absence is affecting Rayla and thereby focusing on reassuring her)

Callum is also just way more of a loose canon, at least to me. Trying out the lightning spell just because in 1x05 with no safety net, staying way too long at the Great Bookery in 5x04 when they absolutely could've just come back after stopping Aaravos and co., and again: he just has an edge to him that Hiccup doesn't? It's hard to describe and I don't think there's necessarily a reason behind besides "they're two different characters with accordingly different characterizations" but I can't see Hiccup doing dark magic or being tempted by it - even if it was to save Toothless, or something? He's just too much of a bleeding heart/animal lover and a lot more Ezran on that level

Long characterization aside, I actually think Rayla and Hiccup are probably more similar in that rebellious / witty streak to your disappointed more restrictive tougher mentor (Runaan, Stoick) but that Callum 100% has Stoick's devotion to Valka down pat. "For you my dear, anything," the slow approach in asking but not assuming she'll be his wife again, the forgiveness and understanding of Valka and Rayla staying away all that time, the "I don't want another. Your mother was the only woman for me. She was the love of my life" excuse me while I go cry.

[empressofthewind]

Hello... Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, games, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks....

Hi! I've gotten a similar ask here but not about specific characters, so I'll happily bite <3

#1 - Silco from Arcane: I just love a well-written antagonist and he in particular is developed SO well in canon. He's introduced like he's going to be this super tropey cartoon villain, with such fierce loyalty to the trope that I think I physically rolled my eyes when he first showed up. I'm talking a slow-clapping, knife-wielding, every-single-word-that-comes-out-of-his-mouth-is-a-monologue type villain. He's given snippets of a backstory throughout the first act, enough that we understand him but not enough to really make him likeable. But THEN he sees Jinx go through a strikingly similar betrayal to that which catalysed his own descent into villainy, and he takes pity on her. He takes her in and raises her like a daughter and guides her through her trauma in the only way he knows how (which is essentially putting her through How To Have A Villain Arc 101, and by design it makes her so much worse, but that's the thing ahgjdsghsdjg he's flawed and insane and he fucks her up so badly but it's out of love which makes it disastrously compelling UGH). It's MASTERFULLY done and I adore every single second he's on screen ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

#2 - Jinx from Arcane: The reasons I adore her pretty perfectly mirror my love for Silco. She's a very complex and compelling villain (though she's more of a protagonist than an antagonist) and she's INSANELY well-written for a character who was originally conceptualised as a soulless knock-off Harley Quinn. We follow her through immense trauma and we see exactly how it shapes her in the present, which makes it easier to rationalise the frankly heinous destruction that she enacts throughout the series. She and Silco are my absolute favourite thing about season 1, which is saying a lot given that it is, to date, the absolute best and most intricately-crafted season I've watched of any media ever. She's also incredibly sassy, and I find her quippy one-liners to be one of the only silver linings about the disappointing second season. Overall brilliant character with a super cool design; cosplayers have never been the same.

#3 - Mello from Death Note: Probably do not need to explain this one on my Death Note blog of all places, but I will anyway. Much like Silco and Jinx, he also falls into "well-written antagonist" territory, and actually has startingly similarities to Silco and Jinx that I would have written an essay about by now if I had reason to believe anyone cared. I love the way he totally shakes up the cat-and-mouse/4D chess dynamic of Death Note. We start out with the L vs Light chess game, then we have the Near vs Light chess game, and then Mello comes swinging in on a chandelier to shoot all the pieces down with his gun. He doesn't play by the rules and he shows us what the intelligence of the main cast could look like if paired with unprecedented theatrical swag. Who the fuck else would blackmail the literal U.S. president via a phone held for them by a mafia subordinate while licking chocolate off their gloves? Literally no one. 10/10 character.

#4 - Near from Death Note: Strangely enough, he was my absolute favourite when I was in the fandom, and having been out of it for a while, Mello has slightly eclipsed my love for Near (most likely by virtue of the Silco/Jinx parallels, since Arcane has been at the forefront of my mind in the meantime). But Near will always be special to me as the narrator and protagonist of my first ever published fanfic. He's a very subtle character which I really like; he's not flashy, but there's a lot more complexity to him than most people give him credit for. He's very creative and thoughtful, he's super sensitive and very attuned to the needs of his team, and he also LOVES Mello so much it's obscene that anyone could possibly think he doesn't have emotions. Holy Christ on a stick the boy is obsessed. He's a fun mix of thoughtful and reserved while also being an absolute yapper with copious amounts of sass. Controversially I find him much more interesting than L, and he has the balls to say things to Light that L used to keep to himself.

No one else is remotely as important to me so I'm dumping them under a cut (FOREWARNING - this is not spoiler-free for many of the mentioned media):

#5 - Elle Woods & Emmett Forrest from Legally Blonde: The Musical: Lumping them together because they should be together forever and always <3 I rewatched the musical earlier this week and was reminded of just how much I love them. Elle's character arc is one of my favourites in anything ever - I LOVE that she's so confident and kind, never betrays her friends or steps on anyone to get ahead, and always stays true to herself. The bar is so low and yet this is incredibly rare in a female protagonist in my experience. Emmett has to go here too because he's SO much better written in the musical than he is in the movie, by virtue of him actually having a personality lmao. I'm a sapphic ace and even I fell in love a little bit. Swoon.

#6 - Midna from The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess: The OG "well-written and compelling antagonist" who made Baby Empress (<- me) fall in love with the trope. She's this little imp character who is technically Link's sidekick in LOZ:TP, but she starts off antagonistic and frankly a little annoying. She's snarky and rude, she mocks Link the whole time and she won't tell him anything about herself or her motives for helping him. But then around halfway through the game, she has this major turning point in her development where she starts to properly trust and open up to Link, and I cannot for the life of me remember what triggers it because it's been SO long but all I can remember is this one scene where she tenderly strokes Link's cheek and ughdfgjhsdjg my 12-year-old shipper heart was squealing. Anyway turns out she was a super hot princess the whole time. HUGE win for the girlies who stumbled upon the game in the midst of their formative sexuality crisis (though I loved her just as much in imp form too, if not more).

#7 - Ellie from The Last of Us: SPECIFICALLY the video games and NOT the dumpster fire of a series, and even more specifically, the first video game. Allegedly she is cool in the second one too, but I could not get further than Joel's death scene in order to find out. I would lump her in with Jinx and Near as "characters I love for their infinite sass". I really admire characters who are confident often to the point of recklessness - which is less applicable to Near, but certainly to Jinx and Ellie - and it's really interesting to see the way she interacts with and ultimately melts the hardened survivor Joel.

#8 - Joel from The Last of Us: Really, the characters in the Last of Us were just so incredibly well-written. I didn't expect to like Joel as much as I did, but God, he's just so compelling, you can't help but love him. What I'm learning about myself in writing this post is that I love the "jaded old man who learns to love again through a surrogate daughter" dynamic, and ALSO the "jaded old man in question is also very morally grey and would burn down the whole world to save said daughter" dynamic. I feel like both of those statements summarise my love for him pretty well.

#9 - Chloe from Life is Strange: Not sure if I could class her as an antagonist, per se, but I can certainly class her as an entertaining character with a traumatic backstory that forged several compelling flaws. It's SO easy throughout the game to become frustrated with her and yet something about her is just so easy to love. For a long time, when I needed a good cry, I would look up the funeral scene from the "Chloe dies" ending and it would get me every time. Also the scene where she destroys her dad's old car in the junkyard.

#10 - Vi from Arcane: Honestly everyone in Arcane is insanely well-written, so this list COULD have just been Arcane characters all the way down, but I didn't want to be too repetitive so I picked one final one to close it out (with honourable mentions to my beloveds Sevika and Vander). Vi is a fantastic character with a tough, fighter persona on the outside but a heart of gold underneath. I am obsessed with the way she mirrors Vander [her surrogate dad, for context] and Jinx mirrors Silco, which creates this super interesting narrative parallel between the two broken relationships and feeds into the theme of history repeating itself/cycles of violence continuing on loop. Fantastic butch lesbian representation also <3