#aint i so fucking lame??

[noritaro]

2022 is almost ending so alas... I haven't made an art summary before actually lmfao, been slacking off with art this year imo and it's weird looking at this cause you can tell what shit I've been watching/have been hyped for throughout the year

[weirdo09]

I HATE PUZZLE GAMES !!!!!

[lordsardine]

.

[sunlitmcgee]

Day 57 of pretending the outpost arc c!benchtrio fallout bs never happened. Bright times are ahead 😎

[serendihoope]

Drooling|JJK oneshot

★Summary:You love your physics proffesor and you were staring at him in his class shamelessly but what happened when he caught you...?

★Genre:dilf!Jk,age gap,dirty talks,lovey-dovey,fluff

★A/N:Well, enjoy my this oneshot and i am preparing for the chap of something about yoy.Please give this oneshot lots of love.

You know what your Professor is teaching and saying but your sub-concious mind is somewhere else.You Are literally drooling over your Physics professor who is teaching about electric potential.You are just thinking how a man can be this tough,handsome.The way his white shirt is hugging his body is like his shirt button's are struggling to hold their button holes.His shirt is neatly tugged under his denim jeans that have ripped around his knee area.A fucking hot meal to devour.You were not really into those men who wear glasses unless your Professor. But your Professor born in wrong time.He is freaking 12 years older than you..Yes,you are 19 and your Professor is 31 but what can stop you from drooling over your handsome Professor. You dont know how many time you were staring at your Professor. You came into realization when your seatmate irene give a slap on your sholuder."What the hell!why do you slap me.It hurts".You fake cried."I told her to do so"that deep voice which can make your thigh clench.You looked at your Professor, who is looking at you with his cold and stern eyes."Hwang Y/N can you tell about us your daydream and please clean your drool its looking dirty".Everyone started to laugh and you embarrassedly cleaned your mouth."please give your attention here on this board"

After the college you directly come back to your apartment.You unlocked your Apartment door and you get inside it.Suddenly a warm hand holds your wrist and make you sit on his lap."Hey,butterfly".He snuggled his face into your neck.You slightly pushed him and said,"Who is butterfly here Mr.Jeon?I am not seeing any butterfly here,mind to tell me?"Jungkook chuckled and said,"Aww,my baby is angry at me"."Why wont i angry!you literally insulted me and the way you said my drool is making my face dirty is fucking lame!" "You only look beautiful when you suck my cock and Your drool get attached to my cock,aint it butterfly". You playfully slapped him and tried to get over from his lap." leave me.I have to cook dinner for us"."Why need to make dinner,when my delicious dinner is sitting on my lap.I will like to eat your delicious cunt baby",He smirked."Oh just shut your mouth and let m-

Her words get stuck by his lips.He started to kiss her lips hungrily as he said she is her meal.He pinched her nipple and she gasps.He take this opportunity and slipped his tounge into her mouth and started to feel her strawberry lip balm."You dont know how i control myself to not your dress ripped in class,your innocent eyes make me fucking hard. Dont you understand my little slut?"

She smiled and said,"should we continue this Mr.jeon? "

He lift her and she quickly wrapped her legs around his torso and said

"I love you "

He replied and attached their forehead.

"I love you my butterfly".

[mstophattii]

a silly little theory about TF2 and its team's !!

Sooo, i was playin some TF2 yesterday, and i stopped to think about somethin: "how the fuck are there multiple of the same mercs?", "how the fuck are there 2 soldiers, both being on opposing teams?", "why the fuck does my team have 8 spies?" well, i think i've figured it out !! So, lets get into it!

THE CLONE THEORY SORTA SUCKS, ACTUALLY

look, i know clones can be cool, and they make sense in the world of TF2, but cmon, its kinda lame. But i got something better. There arent multiple of the same mercs in each team, or in opposing teams. Why? The game aint canon. I know this sounds wild, but i have proof. In the catch up comic, saxton hale himself refers to Team Fortress 2 as a dramatized version of the actual events of the gravel wars.

now, im not saying the mercs arent crazy or wacky, i do firmly believe they are indeed like that, but that means that shit like the unnarmed combat aint canon. And it also means that multiple of the same mercs dont necessarily exist, which means that it could be just our nine main boys fighting each other without like, 7 engineers on the same team. Alrighty, the clone theory's solved, right? Aw shit, it aint.

ABOUT THE TEAM SWAPS:

aw shit, the theory's over, right? Nuh uh. I have something that might explain it.

the mercs constantly switch teams.

i know, it sounds sorta nuts, BUT, i got a theory. RED and BLU constantly try to steal the other team's mercenaries. "the fuck you mean by that?" well, i sorta like to think that the RED mercs constantly receive letters from BLU saying that if they join BLU they'll get a salary three times bigger than the one that they get from RED. And the same thing applies for the mercs on BLU, but with letters coming from RED instead. So, we got that figured out, the mercs constantly switch teams because they want a higher salary.

Now lets address the elephant in the room, the "meet the team" trailers.

THE MEET THE TEAM VIDEOS ARE PROPAGANDA FOR THE PEOPLE OF BADWATER.

I mean, thats pretty much confirmed. Look at this:

but you may wonder: "then how the fuck does shit like meet the medic happen, cause like, yknow, that scene with a fucking horde of soldiers trynna kill medic and heavy" well, this may sound like a stretch, but since its propaganda, i believe engineer could have done some wacky shit to create shit like that. I've got 2 explanations:

explanation number 1: engineer did some wacky as fuck shenanigans to create those hordes of enemies.

as the title says, since engineer is a very, very, very smart little fella, he could've just done some wacky computer magic to create the soldiers present in meet the medic, and by wacky computer magic i mean he just edited the movie to include those soldiers with CGI or some shit like that. (i know tf2 happens in 1969, but if engineer can build a fucking teleporter then he can do CGI)

explanation number 2: ROBOTS !!!!!

this one is ten times more flawed than the first one, but since engi is a very smart little dwarf, he could've just built robots that would act and look like solly and would also try to kill medic and heavy.

THE RESPAWN ROOM:

so, this one is more up to your choice, but i do consider respawning canon. "how tho?" you might ask? I have 0 fucking clue, maybe some teleporter and australium shenanigans?? I dunno man. But thats up to ya!

THE END:

thank you so much for reading this! I spent like, an hour making this, and please forgive me for my shitty english, its not my first language. Please reblog (if you want, of course!), and if you have any criticism or questions just drop a comment talking about it and i'll try to answer it! thank you so much for reading!

[d1ckmast3r]

Hi Adam! BIG fan, I love your work and your general awesomenessitude. I wanted to ask; man, you seem to have a GREAT outlook on life. Chock full of joie de vivre and what other. What's your secret? I try but dude, sometimes I just get the sads. Part of being a lame-ass human and not a divinely ordained being, I'm sure, but still, you got any wisdom to share?

Thanks dude. I'd say have a good day but I'm sure all your days are great, being Heaven's foremost angel and all, so I'll just say... keep on keeping on, man!

i appreciate the dick riding. truly. its cute n all but maybe take a guy out to dinner first??? set the mood a little before you hop right on there huh?

but whatever— you’re already here spilling your fucking guts and seem to be enjoying being in my presence so i’ll help you out the kindness of my devine heart.

first bit of advice. drop the french. its such a miserable fucking language man. why the fuck does anyone need 20some ways to say the same word?! shit makes no sense and it makes you sound stupid. the word hors d’oeuvre? what the fuck is that? just to sound like or-derv? seriously. i guaran-fucking-tee your life will get infinitely better when you start ignoring the french like everyone else does.

second bit. just fuckin chillax. none of that mortal shit really matters anyway. the fuck is there to be sad about? whatever it is aint gonna matter when youre in heaven or hell— and if you end up in hell your problems are gonna be like. a million times worse. so just fuckin forget about your stupid mortal problems. kick up your feet n turn on some bangin tunes or somethin idk. do literally anything else.

you’re welcome.

[azzo0]

Baked With Love.

The following is a snippet from Always.

Summary: Bakugo helps her bake with a little bit of teasing.

Yoshiko washed her hands in the kitchen sink while Bakugo beat up eggs for rolled-up omelettes. She wiped her hands with a towel and walked up beside him. "Want help?"

"I dont need help, fuck off if you want to eat."

"Y'know, I'm not trying to strike your precious ego here. Just speedin' up things."

"Yeah, standing there will speed things up." He glared at her.

"Well, tell me what to do."

"Get the miso soup out of the fridge and heat it."

"Ask nicely."

"I thought you wanted to fucking help??"

Yoshiko blew him an air kiss, making his eye twitch. She opened the fridge and found the pot of miso soup. She took it out, peeking inside. "Hey, Bakugo-"

"Katsuki." He corrected, not looking up from the spinach leaves he was chopping to put in the eggs.

"Huh?"

"You called me Katsuki when I got shot."

"And you called me Yoshiko."

"Get a hint, bitch. I'm askin' you to use my given name. Feel honoured, brat." He said, looking up from the cutting board.

"Nah." She transferred the soup into a glass bowl. "If I call you Katsuki, you still won't call me Yoshiko."

"Yeah, you're right. Your name is lame anyways."

Yoshiko laughed, putting the bowl in the microwave. "Katsuki. There. Happy now?"

He remained silent, rolling up the eggs in the pan with chopsticks. Yoshiko faced the microwave, waiting for an answer. "Yes, Yoshiko." That warm sensation was back again when she heard her name slip so effortlessly from his lips. She stared at the bowl roasting in the oven. She didn't want to feel any of this. Why was she suddenly seeing him in a different light? Of course, she knew the answer to her question. She'd been here before.

When the oven dinged, she took the bowl out and set it on the counter. "Do we have tofu?" She asked Bakugo, who was now cutting up the omelette.

"Yeah, in the fridge. Last shelf."

Yoshiko nodded and took the tofu out, slicing a few pieces to put inside after separating the soup into two smaller bowls. Bear came into the kitchen, sitting expectantly by Yoshiko's heels. Yoshiko cut a few small pieces for him and put them in his eating bowl.

"Oi, I'm done here." Bakugo said.

"Okay, the soup's done as well," Yoshiko said, taking a seat on one of the high stools by the counter.

Bakugo sat across from her, and the two began eating in silence. It felt nice working out together and then having breakfast while everyone was busy snoring. Bakugo liked it because it felt like he had her entirely to himself during that time.

"Damn, this soup is good," Yoshiko said after taking a sip.

"Duh, 'cause I'm the one who made it." He said, taking a sip from his own bowl.

"Maybe you can help me bake."

"What?"

"It's Hitoshi's birthday in two days." She explained. "And I want to bake him a cake, but I never baked before. So I was thinking of baking cupcakes today, so I got some idea on how to get around stuff. I don't want to burn it."

"I'm not helpin'."

"What, why not?!"

"I 'aint got the time to bake some silly cupcakes. Besides, I don't bake either."

"But you and Sato baked cookies the other day!" Yoshiko reminded.

"I just happened to be there when that idiot was in the kitchen, and I didn't want him to make a mess."

"Sato's a professional. He cleans up after he's done. You just don't want to help me."

"Damn right," Bakugo smirked.

"Fuck you." Yoshiko flipped him off. "I'll just ask Sato to help me inst-"

"Fucking fine, I'll help you." Bakugo groaned. "But your ass better not annoy me, or I'm ditching you."

"Aren't you the sweetest?" Yoshiko sniggered.

｡⋆｡˚ ʚïɞ ˚｡⋆｡

"So, what kind of cupcakes do you want to bake?" Bakugo sighed after he put out the utensils they would need.

"Chocolate."

"Okay..." Bakugo opened Sato's baking book since he didn't know the recipe by heart. "Crack an egg into the bowl." He dictated, elbow on the counter as he watched her pick up the egg. She tapped it against the bowl, spilling its contents out of the bowl.

"Oops,"

"Oops, my ass!" Bakugo yelled, pushing her aside. He grabbed a few tissue papers and cleaned her mess. "Don't you know how to crack a damn egg?!" He lightly tapped another egg against the bowl and perfectly cracked it open.

"My bad, Gordon Ramsay."

"Shut up and add the milk." Yoshiko peeked at the recipe, checking how much milk she'd need and poured the milk into the bowl.

"Okay, add the rest of the wet ingredients." He watched her measure out the quantities and pour them into the bowl. It almost felt like he was babysitting a toddler that wanted to bake.

"I'm done," Yoshiko said.

"Okay, whisk it up."

Yoshiko held the beater, holding it in between closed fingers like she was going to stab someone with it. She poked it into the bowl and slowly moved it back and forth.

"Bitch, that's not how you beat the batter." Bakugo frowned, pinching his nose. He snatched the bowl and whisk from her, showing her the right way to beat it.

"Okay, now for the dry ingredients." He held the book up again and dictated the ingredients out for her to measure and put in another bowl. At least her dumb brain knew how to measure ingredients. "Now gently mix the stuff up." He held his breath as she combined the dry ingredients, letting it out when she didn't spill anything.

"Now, just pour the wet ingredients into the dry." He said, handing her a spatula.

"Okay." She took the spatula from him, transferring the wet ingredients into the dry ones. "Now mix it up. Don't fucking spill anything."

"I know, I know. Stop being so bossy." She rolled her eyes, beating the mixtures together. Bakugo's eye twitched as he watched her whisk the batter with the speed of a turtle.

"For fucks sake, you're so damn slow." He stood behind her and brought the bowl closer to her stomach, putting his hands on top of hers while she still held the bowl and whisk. Yoshiko's breath hitched as she felt his warmth creep into her back, catching his sweet caramel smell with a hint of cologne. His lecture on how to beat the batter properly fell on deaf ears as she was too busy blushing and processing the position she was in.

"Got it now?" He asked, gaining her attention again, letting her hands go.

"Huh- y-yeah. I got it."

"You just fucking stuttered."

"Your ears are not working." She defended, quickly beating the batter up, glad he couldn't see her face.

"I'm sure they are," Bakugo muttered under his breath, still standing behind and watching over her shoulder.

Once the batter was done, Yoshiko put the cupcake liners inside the cupcake moulds and let Bakugo transfer the batter into them. He sighed and went to put the spatula in the sink when Yoshiko snatched it from him. "Are you really going to waste all that sweet goodness?" Yoshiko said, wiping the batter off it with a finger and licking it. Bakugo rolled his eyes at her and adjusted the heating, popping the tray into the oven.

Yoshiko kept the spatula in the sink and gathered the dirty utensils to wash. Bakugo joined her, drying the dishes as she handed them to him. Once done, they dried their hands, walking over to the oven to see the cupcakes slowly rising.

"Heh, I'm already drooling," Yoshiko said.

"Of course." Bakugo snorted, glancing down at her. She had a little batter under her lip. He put a knuckle under her chin, making her face him and taking her by surprise. His thumb brushed under her lip, and he slowly brought it to his lips to lick it all while he locked eyes with her.

Yoshiko's lips parted in shock, a wild blush blooming from her face to her neck down. The AUDACITY this guy had. She opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out.

"Mm, not bad." He said, looking at the oven again.

"You-" Yoshiko began, unsure of what to say. Bakugo looked at her again, smirking when he saw her flustered.

"What?" He tilted his head.

"You fucking idiot."

"Aw, are you blushing?" He inched his face closer. For a split second, he saw her eyes dart down to his lips and back at his eyes again. Oh, God, that made him want to kiss her.

Yoshiko gulped, looking into his dangerously close crimson eyes. She could feel her pulse in her neck, her heart pounding so loud she could hear it in her ears. For the first time, she found Bakugo intimidating. That shitty look on his face was daring her to back away so he could win this silent game they were playing.

Since when did their challenges become this flirty?

"I hope you break your arm again." She growled at him, inching even closer just to make him back away. He did not back away.

"The feeling is mutual, darling." He purred.

"So- uh, what are you guys making?" Yoshiko heard Shinsou's voice, her head immediately snapping to her side to see him awkwardly standing there. She quickly moved away from Bakugo, her face heating up even more.

"We? We're just baking cupcakes! They're almost done." Her voice came out louder than she wanted it to. It was like she lost controll over herself.

"Uhuh..."

"Really. We were just discussing how much time we need to keep them inside. Right, Katsuki?"

"Totally," Bakugo smirked at her. Yoshiko wanted to punch his nose so bad because through that smirk he was telling her that he won.

"Katsuki?" Shinsou raised an eyebrow.

"Uh- yeah..." Yoshiko trailed off, looking down at the floor.

"Interesting. So when are these cupcakes going to be done?" Shinsou asked. Oh, he was going to have fun teasing her later.

"Ten minutes, I guess." She said, glancing at the timer. She stepped away from Bakugo, not looking at either of their eyes. She hung her apron behind the door. "I'm going to take a shower. Take a cupcake once they're done."

"Okay," Shinsou replied, watching her leave the kitchen. Once he was sure she was out of earshot, his eyes narrowed at Bakugo.

"The fuck you lookin' at, eye bags?" Bakugo scowled.

"She's my best friend," Shinsou said.

"Yeah, not shit."

"Hurt her, and I'll break your neck." Shinsou threatened, voice low.

"Hah? I don't need you to tell me what to do."

"Consider it a warning." Shinsou shrugged. "The last guy who broke her heart got his nose broken by me. But she doesn't need to know that, aye?"

"I'm not her shitty ex," Bakugo snarled. "Besides, I'm the stronger one."

"Pretty sure I could brainwash you, given you can keep your mouth shut," Shinso smirked.

"Shut the fuck up."

The oven dinged, and Bakugo took the cupcakes out while Shinsou made himself coffee. Once the cupcakes were cool enough, Bakugo took them out of the mould. Shinsou took one, taking a bite of the warm cupcake.

"These taste like they were baked with love." He teased.

"I will kill you."

｡⋆｡˚ ʚïɞ ˚｡⋆｡

[abrakophile]

ive posted these before but i cant find them on my blog! so here we go again...

i ship, yes yes, but i want to draw attention to sigma’s lame ass dance in the game. its fucking lame. hes literally dutch and look, i hate the dutch, but they really shoulda made him dance gabber style. its not even hard, its just tense flailing, its just- ugh

also...slightly nsfw vvv

this was part of a series of drawings for the pair, this was back when i was gonna commit to drawing porn for a living. thank god i got my shit vaguely together enough to know that aint it chief however...dude im pretty good at drawing it...like stupidly, and im ashamed yes, but cmon, my lines are so good

[pwnyta]

Now that im done with my GI dailies...

ROUND 2 of the BNHA award show starts!

The award for QUICKEST YET BADDEST ENTRANCE AND EXIT goes to...

Star!

Damn she was a bad bitch....

------

Award for I DONT BELIEVE THAT MAN HAS EVER BEEN TO MEDICAL SCHOOL goes to....

ITS A TIE!!!

JEANIST AND WHATS-HIS-FACE!

Ok they can preform open heart surgery? Sure...

-----

Award for BIGGEST ASSPULL goes to...

ANOTHER TIE AND WELCOME BACK

BEST JEANIST & SERIOUSLY I CANT REMEMBER HIS NAME FOR THE LIFE OF ME

AND!!! ERI!!!

Damn this was dumb as hell....

----

Award for MOST DISAPPOINTING COME BACK goes to...

MIRIO!

...off-screen.... girl... Mirio I love you so much theres no way you should be this lame...

------

Award for SERIOUSLY WHY THE FUCK WAS THIS GUY ADDED? IT HAD LIKE NO SATISFYING PART IN THE STORY.... goes to....

KUROGIRI!

Kurogiri you were so intriguing before Hori made you a zombie of Aizawas friend he just randomly added...

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The award for MAKING ME THINK OF THE WEATHER EPISODE FROM UNHHHHH goes to....

...??? HER!!!!

HELLLOOOO WERE HAVING WEATHER~~~~

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Award for MOST WASTED STORY POTENTIAL IN MAYBE ALL OF MANGA HISTORY goes to....

Mutant bigotry!!!

Really Hori your bringing this up now? To try and make Spinners random character turn understandable? Weve had mutant characters the ENTIRE GOD DAMN TIME HORI!!! PRO HEROES! STUDENTS! RANDOM BG CHARACTERS! YOURE BRINGING THIS UP NOW!? TOKOYAMI ALMOST KILLED SOME OF HIS CLASSMATES!!!! YOU THINK BIGOTS WOULDNT HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT IT!? WHAT A TOOTHLESS TONE-DEAF RACISM ALLEGORY!! HOLY SHIT HORI IM SO PISSED ABOUT THIS YOU CANT EVEN IMAGINE.

------

Award for MOST DRAWN OUT NOT-DEAD REVEAL goes to...

BAKUGO

I mean obviously.... You know letting him actually have some smooth character development woulda been too hard for Hori...

----

Award for HOLY SHIT THE 'CEST SHIPPERS ARE GONNA LOVE THIS SHIT goes to....

ITS A TIE!!!! TWINSIES!!!

Endeavor/Dabi

AND!!!

THE SHIGARAKIS!

...Yall can get mad at me for this one... You know I aint wrong...

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Award for MOST UNHINGED YET SELFLESS ROMANTIC SACRIFICE goes to....

STAIN!!!!

Seriously Im in tears... how did this happen...

----

Award for THE MOST POINTLESS FACE HEAL FACE TURN IN HISTORY goes to....

....HER!

??? Seriously you got pissed about killing villains so you started killing heroes even a teenage boy? Thats so fucking stupid girl....fuckin WHAT?

-----

Award for I DONT CARE WHAT ANYONE SAYS YOURE AN UNDERRATED TOP TIER G AND YOU DESERVE AN AWARD goes to...

MT LADY!!!

DAMN SHES FUCKING COOL! NEVER DISAPPOINTS IN A FIGHT!

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Award for SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! SHUT UP!!! THIS ISNT CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!!! I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE Y- goes to...

ENDEAVOR!!

SHUT YOUR BITCH ASS UP ENDEAVOR!!!

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Award for THEY NEEDED TO TAKE YOU OUT EARLIER ON SO YOU COULDNT CLAP THE BADDIES CHEEKS AND ITS SO OBVIOUS WHY DID HORI MAKE YOU SO STRONG FOR NO REASON TOKOYAMI???? goes to....

TOKOYAMI!!!

HOLY SHIT TOKOYAMI!

--------

Award for I HATE THAT THEYRE MAKING ME DEFEND YOU... goes to...

HAWKS!!!

Hawks gave Twice plenty of chances to stop fucking killing people so he could be taken in alive! WHY DO I HAVE TO DEFEND THIS BLACKHOLE OF WASTED FUCKIN TIME HORI WTF....???

-----

Award for MOST WEIRDLY TOUCHING DEDICATION goes to...

All Mights CANT STOP TWINKLING attack!

The way I cried a little... my little tchotchke.... Him changing his attacks from states to his students was already so good but damn... :') Aoyama deserved this.

-----

Award for MOST TRAGICALLY SUBMISSIVE BABYGIRL goes to...

ALL MIGHT!!!

I mean we knew from the jump but.... DAMN Toshi.

------

Award for MOST HATED GOOD SHIP goes to...

KIRISHIDO!!!

Seriously FUCK those KRBK fans! Im so glad you got bested by the BKDKs you rancid fucks.... This ship was always superior!!!

------

Award for LOVING SHOTO THE MOST goes to....

Certainly not his fucking family....

IIDA!!!!

So this is love... mmm mmm mmm mmm~ So this is... love?

----

Award for SICKEST VILLAIN DESIGN goes to...

Kunieda(I guess?)

Seriously this guy is so fucking cool looking. Clears literally every single villain design. Its not even close.

------

The award for MOST HORNGRY goes too....

AFO

Seriously AFO... if you werent so obsessed with Toshi you probably woulda won its literally so fucking funny.... Elevated the nosebleed trope to literally spurting blood from the forehead veins from how aggressively horknee you are. LMAO. AND YET somehow this is not the weirdest boner you have for another man.

---

Award for THE MOST CONSISTENTLY GOOD CHARACTER IN BNHA goes to...

ALL MIGHT. Obviously.

IDK if Hori loves you or hates you by how he writes you Toshi but damn you wear this consistency so fuckin well not even Hori could fuck you up!

-----

Award for MOST REALISTICALLY AGED BY THE STRESS OF THIS BATTLE goes to...

Naomasa!!

.... LMAO... Damn. Stress so intense it made you turn into a distinctly designed character.. The magic of facial hair and eyebags...

---

The award for REALLY BITCH!? YOU HAVE A PERFECT COUNTER FOR STAINS QUIRK BUT NOT ONE TO AGE YOURSELF TO COUNTER YOUR DEAGING?! THATS FUCKIN CONVENIENT HORIKOSHI goes to...

AFO!!! For BLOODLET!

The only blemish on the otherwise sickest side battle in this whole arc TBH..

-----

Thats the end of part 2 of BNHA AWARDS!!! Some serious upsets this round! Damn!

[okaystoptellingmetomakeanaccount]

Facciotto drawing is a 4-parter world of ice !!!!!

Okay so basically what we can take from this is: we will get more of Magica doing cool shit with the ocean. Volcanic witches will return. The chapter title makes it sound like Magica’s last name is Oceanica lol.

A world of ice reminds me of that Casty story l’impero sottozero. But that was more science fiction and politics this is gonna be cool magic things there gonna be magic ice in a world of ice in a ice ice magic ice

If every chapter is gonna be 30 pages that means more than 120 pages again which will slap (ITS THE YEAR OF LONG ENNA STORIES EVERYONE YIPPEE)

So like theyre going hard on this whole Magica + water stuff. Which i really like. I like water. I love it so much, i quite literally drink it every day. Even, the country in which i live is under the sea level. And ill tell you, i am largely MADE of water. If that aint enough prove that im a water fan…

Tbh my dream disney comic series was Magica going on her own adventures in the magic realm on a journey or something and then have the format be like PK and now that Seven witches is getting a sequel, its looking like this whole Magica fucking around with no numero uno in sight might just become a regular series. Like this is pretty much becoming my dream comic at this point.

Okay so lets do a bit of speculating on the plot. Ill say that something that happened in seven witches somehow unleashed a curse on the magic realm that has now gone into an ice age. Or maybe they will cause the curse in the first chapter. Actually the chapter title makes that seem more likely. That bitch from last time comes back to start some beef and they fight and shit and then somehow oh oh really cold water gets everywhere. Then Magica journeys through the ice world to solve it and things. Come back in 5 weeks to see that i got everything wrong. I kinda hope that actually what i just made up sounds really lame

But why would she go up against the volcanic witches? She made peace with 6 of em last time theyre best buds now. Magica does some really bad stuff maybe? She goes into dark forbidden magic territory? But that seems unlikely and out of character for what Enna has been writing. The other witches get hypnotized or something? OR MAYBE THE TITLE IS A FAKEOUT. I GOT YOU ENNA. The story starts off with them battling but its a friendly competition and then the story goes somewhere else!

Anyways i reaaaaallly want to know what theyve been cooking and no idea how its gonna go but i know its gonna be amazing because long story + Bruno Enna + Magica = at the very very least gonna be a ton of fun.

Sorry for the ramblings but i could not not ramble about this i mean its Magica and (then the writer proceeded to type out ten paragraphs of confused rambling text where they used the words magica and enna around 3041 times)

[suckmybigtoeoikawa]

Hello, I saw your request page. Hopefully, requests are still open. If they are, can I please request some headcanons sfw or nsfw for Keigo(Hawks), Taishiro (Fat Gum), Toshinori (All Might), and Enji (Yes, Endeavor.) With a curvy bbw, beautiful black woman, big beautiful woman. (We thicc girls need love too) I can never find any good ones. They're all so lame. If Enji isn't someone you can't do, maybe you can do (Hizashi) Present Mic. I know a lot of people hate Endeavor, for good reason but I like the direction he's heading. And honestly, the idea of him being put into his place by a tiny sassy black woman, I live for it.😌

dawg i’ve been on break for the longest but i gotchu 🤝

n since i literally haven’t wrote in like an eternity imma do endeavor ans present mic, yk gotta spoil my bby😩

i went over board with hawks…

Keigo

aint no way this man not gonna date a black girl

on top of that i imagine her being thick/plus size so like 👀

Keigo is a ass man for sure ain’t not way this man ain’t about the ass

you’ll catch him staring at you ass or always wanting to feel it

he just wanted to touch you all the time

ONTOP OF THAT HE’S SHAMLESS ABOUT IT TOO

there’s a photo of you guys in public and s his hand is right on your ass while he’s grinning at the camera.. stg that got some news going

he’s the type to like hold onto your stomach, or like play with your stomach fat

and it’s lowkey annoying but he just can’t help himself

everyday there is constant praise for your body, like literally he’s always saying something slick but ofc in an endearing way stuff like

“hey do a 360 for me… now just do a 180.. gah dayum”

“but like wouldn’t it be funny if you just like.. say on my face.. hahaha.. i’m being serious.”

SPEAKING OF SITTING ON FACES, he’s like the type to threaten to throw himself off a building just so u can sit on his face, you think i’m playin he don did it before he will not hesitate to strike again…

whenever you do sit on his face he’s always pressing your cunt down deeper into his face, he wants to taste every part of you

he’s the type to grip your ass when your riding him, he fr act like he can’t handle it but chileeeee

he will have you everywhere

he’s also the type to show u off, like seriously people are sick of him

“look at my baby” this nigga squealin

but yeah he’s so sweet, his heart beat faster when he’s with you and so does his cock 🤭

Taishiro

literally will carry you, like stop bro he’d carry you all over the place

he’s so sweet towards his s/o he thinks you could fr do no wrong cause you just so cute to him omfg

and i cannot stress this enough .. he’s obsessed with you like your literally the first thought on his mind :((

another tummy grabber

he’ll hug you from behind and grab your stomach and just continue have small talk with you like he’s not using you as a personal stress ball

OMFG

he would kiss your stomach too like dawg whattttt so fucking cute

he’s all about body positivity so he loves when your feeling yourself in a nice outfit

especially when all your assets look good, shooooot he gonna be like “come here girl”

he’s also the type to squeeze your cheeks, on your face or the other ones

also kiss your cheeks :(((

he also wouldn’t care if your big spoon or little spoon but he prefers to be big spoon

when he hugs you he lifts you up bro omfg

yea overall he’s so sweet towards you and everytime he sees you he calls you precious cause to him your so precious :((

Enji 🙄

idk he’s giving sugar daddy vibes

he’s the type to buy you nice little silk nightgowns

and pay for everything dawg

but he’s the type to lay on your chest, like your suffocating but it’s a nice way to go out

he treats you really nicely and is in love with you thighs, he will buy you certain outfits that try to make your thighs stand out

during more sensual times he’s the type to kiss you thighs, or if he’s feeling more frisky he’d leave bite marks or hickeys

there was a moment when you and Enji had sex the day before you went to the beach and the press was there

you had to lie to them and tell them that a dog bit your thigh.. and enji wasn’t looking any better with the red scratches on his back

i think he prefers to see your natural hair out and doing it as well, because of the difference in hair types, it’s new to him

before you guys started dating you fr had to put his big ass in check, cause who tf does he think he catching an attitude with 😐

you would grab his by his tie and make his ass get on your level and tell him that you wasn’t there for none of that bullshit dawg

ans he listened 😋

but yeah he’s pretty good

he’s fr the thigh destroyer, will take your thighs off with a knife and fork

Hizashi

i swear if you say anything bad about yourself he’s gonna start fighting the air

his goal is to just make you laugh cause he loves your smile, he loves the way you laugh

but aside from that he lives the way your body moves, like omfg

you don’t think your doing anything, but to him your doing everything

he’ll try to get you to dance with him, cause yk he likes to see you move

and he has a bad (/good) habit of always having his hands on you, but it becomes bad because his hands will go to low… or to high..

like one time you were dancing with him and his hands went from your hips down to your ass

like oh.. we’re in public

or you’ll be cookin something and his hands travel up toooooo far, ans it gets you flustered

i feel like he loves your natural hair because he loves to do hair together at the same times

but i feel like he loves it when you get braids

another bad problem he has his whenever you get braids, especially long ones, he wants to pull on them

fight him. like actually

cause he will do it during random ass times

he lays on your chest dawg, and between your thighs

shoot even on your ass

be thinks the stomach gurgling sounds nice

like oh…

but he’s so funny during your whole relationship, and he’s so accepting of learning and adapting to new things 10/10 partner

**

i’m so sorry this came out so late, but after a whole lot of life events imma try to post a lot more :))

I hope you enjoyed it 🤍 Please Like, comment what you think and follow 🤍 have a great day 🤍

masterlist

[pesterloglog]

Dave Strider, Roxy Lalonde, Dirk Strider, Karkat Vantas

Meat, page 32

DAVE: yo

DAVE: love to chat but im kinda in the middle of something

ROXY: yo yourself but this is important

DAVE: uhhh

DAVE: more important than salvaging the global economy from potential disaster??

DAVE: sounds hugely unlikely

ROXY: idk about that

ROXY: in terms of scale and relativity and stuff maybe not

ROXY: its actually kinda hard to tell

ROXY: i guess in the grand scheme of things

ROXY: shes just takin a sort of nap

ROXY: but its one HELL of a nap bro

DAVE: a nap you say

DAVE: well this changes the fuck out of everything

ROXY: yea??

DAVE: nah

ROXY: lmao dirk just texted me about this

ROXY: somehow he found out about jade did u tell him

DAVE: uh no

ROXY: he just said make sure she gets lotsa daylight

ROXY: that itll help with the “exorcism she needs”.....

ROXY: and also to say hi to calliope for some fuckin reason??

DAVE: thats weird

DAVE: since when does he give a fuck about them

ROXY: idk

ROXY: guess ill just open the damn curtains and let some light in here

ROXY: he usually knows stuff about weird things

DAVE: so whats wrong with her again

DAVE: like

DAVE: some sort of demonic nap

ROXY: ok i wouldnt say shes NAPPING per se

ROXY: shes just like

ROXY: floatin here... upright

ROXY: eyes wide open

ROXY: and theyre both pitch black

DAVE: oh so she saw one of my latest sbahj campaign ads

ROXY: lol

ROXY: no dude

ROXY: like what im sayin is

ROXY: she looks a lil possessed

ROXY: by uh

ROXY: grim spirits n shit

DAVE: is she fucking grimbark again

ROXY: no!

ROXY: this isnt grimbark

ROXY: i KNOW what grimbark is dave this aint it

ROXY: it seems more serious tbh??

ROXY: like existing in some transformative state that isnt a literal fuckin joke

DAVE: ok yeah this does sound pretty bad

DAVE: but its not really my field

DAVE: did you try calling rose

ROXY: yea that was totes my original plan

ROXY: like no offense ur not #1 on my speed dial when it comes to this kinda thing

ROXY: but rose isnt picking up

ROXY: probly on account of ailments to be fair

ROXY: i called an unruly number of times

ROXY: and kan wasnt picking up either so...

DAVE: huh

DAVE: spooky

ROXY: hella spooky

ROXY: somethin about all this seems wrong

DAVE: yeah i guess

DAVE: what do you think is up

ROXY: idk

ROXY: i feel like theres something movin just out the corner of my vision but every time i turn to look at it

ROXY: its gone

ROXY: its givin me chills rn like im being watched

DAVE: well im no fucking ace detective

DAVE: or some gumshoe flatfoot dicking up the place suckin hard on my sherlock pipe like some sleuth of the fucking year

ROXY: dave

DAVE: but maybe we should consider the possibility that you are literally being watched

ROXY: ..............

DAVE: anyway can we hold that wise and rad thought i just had

DAVE: i gotta give karkat some emotional support

DAVE: since gettin jake on our side was a pretty huge fucking bonanza for us

DAVE: which has almost equal probability of winning us the election as it does blowing up in our faces depending on this speech he gives

DAVE: so we gotta like

DAVE: concentrate here?????

DAVE: instead of jerking each other off all god damned day for the rest of our lives

DAVE: (im just joking we dont actually do that)

ROXY: oh

ROXY: jakes on ur side then?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: wasnt that hard to convince him after your girl j crock started slut shaming him on public access

ROXY: god dammit jane

DAVE: so i take it jade didnt convert you to our cause before going into her gothic trance fugue or whatever

ROXY: siiigh

ROXY: i just want this whole stupid political thing over n done with tbh

ROXY: i hate watchin u guys tear each other apart in the news

DAVE: yeah sorry about that

DAVE: sorry its making you feel bad i mean

DAVE: not sorry that were doin it

DAVE: itd be an unconscionably lame move to put something on a billboard that i didnt 100% stand by

DAVE: but that sounds suspiciously like something jane would do

DAVE: aka the bad guy in this situation

DAVE: like objectively speaking

ROXY: ugh pls dont start

DAVE: just sayin

ROXY: idgAF!!!

DAVE: also

DAVE: aside from how vehemently i disagree with every detail in janes shitty platform

DAVE: i also think

DAVE: karkats the right guy for the job

DAVE: full stop

ROXY: you rly believe in him dont u

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: of course i do

DAVE: because i...

ROXY: hey before you jet can i ask you another question

ROXY: theres somethin else ive been meanin to ask u about for a while

DAVE: uh alright shoot

ROXY: yea soooo

ROXY: dave how did you come out

DAVE: ...

DAVE: what?

ROXY: like as not being straight

ROXY: howd you couch that to ppl w/o them freakin out or being awkward around u

ROXY: do u think its ever too late to

ROXY: idk

ROXY: change ur mind?

ROXY: about the person you wanna be??

ROXY: like is there a some point of no return you can cross where everyone is waitin for u to have a big ass revelation about your internal character

ROXY: but its like “dude no u already used up all ur gay capital when u started datefriend cohabitating w a cute as hell skeleton alien”

ROXY: and anything after that ur just gettin greedy

ROXY: is greedy even the right word

ROXY: greedy for droppin bombshells

ROXY: bout gender identities and sexual preferences

ROXY: or ids n preffies as i like to call em ;)

DAVE: ids n preffies

DAVE: damn

DAVE: thats fucking good

DAVE: anyway uh

DAVE: thats a pretty deep question considering all the shit we have going on right now

ROXY: yeah ur right

ROXY: now is probs not the best time for a feels jam

ROXY: especially with the creepy jade situation happening on my couch here

DAVE: i dunno if id worry too much about that

DAVE: jade goes into trances literally all the time

DAVE: she fucking loves sleeping

DAVE: youd think someone who spent so much of her life locked in a state of dubiously consensual slumber would wanna get as few zees as possible in her adult life but not jade

DAVE: ive never known anyone who hits the snooze button more times in a row than her

DAVE: if youre that worried take her to a hospital

ROXY: im thinkin about it!!

ROXY: not even sure if i wanna like

ROXY: mess with her tho?

ROXY: how would i even take her there...

DAVE: ok well while you ponder whether you wanna dump jade in a wheelbarrow and trundle her groggy spooked-up ass to the hospital

DAVE: in the meantime ill rap at you about my epiphany concerning the desire to bone some dudes

DAVE: probably not a literal rap though

ROXY: wow im disappointed

DAVE: i mean i could TOTALLY rap about wanting to bone dudes if i wanted?

DAVE: im just on the fuckin clock here and theres lots of people lookin at me

ROXY: :(

DAVE: ok so

DAVE: what ive learned is

DAVE: coming to terms with all this bullshit is a thing you sort of do in stages

DAVE: like stage one is you making jokes about how sweaty dudes standing close together in tv shows seems really gay

DAVE: stage two is making jokes about that and not immediately adding no homo afterward

DAVE: stage three is flirting with all your male friends ironically and not even thinking about adding no homo afterward because youre so fuckin woke and secure in your ironclad straight masculinity that you dont have anything to prove to anybody anymore

DAVE: or thats just what you say out loud

DAVE: inside you start being like

DAVE: oh shit

DAVE: maybe yes homo

DAVE: stage four is freaking out about that and putting the no homo back on all your statements even objectively heterosexual ones which just stupidly makes everything you say sound extra gay

DAVE: stage five is

DAVE: actually wait the next few stages are various permutations of the same thing that i already described

DAVE: it starts being like a gay fractal

DAVE: anyway eventually you arrive at like stage nine

DAVE: which is reminding everyone who will listen that youre gay minimum six times a day

DAVE: in really lame ways like

DAVE: oh cool dude are you making hot pockets

DAVE: better make mine a gay hot pocket

DAVE: cause im a gay homosexual who only consumes homo ass snacks delivered right to my mouth by a big queer butler

DAVE: servin it right up on his huge gay dick

DAVE: but that all only applies to the extent which i am technically gay

DAVE: which in my case is only about maybe 30% to 70%

DAVE: so only cook 30% to 70% of my gay hot pocket

DAVE: cause you know straights are fucking animals who never defrost their pepperoni

DAVE: and i gotta rep for that like 50% straightness still lurking inside me like the idiot who fell asleep in the shopping mall when it was closing for the night

DAVE: so now theres just this straight dude locked in a dark fucking mall for some stupid reason haunting the place like a cryptid and rummaging through the trash in the food court

DAVE: also just in case janes opposition research is listening in on their illegal wiretap i know the word bisexual exists btw im just choosing not to use it in service of spitting some fuckin chuckle jokes here so lets all calm down and not let this one become a distressingly literal federal issue

DAVE: anyway when all is said and done

DAVE: you eat a half cooked hot pocket because all your roommates think the height of humor is taking what was obviously an improvisational riff at unironic face value to punk you

ROXY: dave...

DAVE: what

ROXY: nm

ROXY: i was gonna ask you why ur like this

ROXY: then i remembered about how ur half me and half dirk

DAVE: yeah it really is crazy how those dope late game familial reveals actually did explain everything

ROXY: so whats stage ten

DAVE: stage ten is uhhhhhhhh

DIRK: The Prince opens his fucking mouth, and just literally starts SAYING SHIT, out loud, because he doesn’t think he can take another fucking second listening to a pompous alien virgin monologuing about gender.

DIRK: No consequence, my ass. You may be able to suppress what I do with my mind, but you have no control over my mouth. I’m nobody’s fucking puppet.

DIRK: And you don’t even know my friends. They’re not yours to toy with.

DIRK: They’re mine.

DIRK: Do you even know where I am right now?

DIRK: Do you have the slightest idea what I’m up to

DIRK: Yeah, well. Try and stop me then.

DIRK: I fucking dare you.

DIRK: Here I go. I’m walking up the tower stairs now.

DIRK: Walk, walk, walk. Ah, the exercise feels good.

DIRK: Argh. Wow, yeah.

DIRK: You’re right. My feet are definitely getting heavy.

DIRK: But the Dead Cherub tragically underestimates the Prince’s determination. He powers the fuck through it. See?

DIRK: Stomp, stomp, stomp. Up the stairs he goes. No fucking sweat.

DIRK: Oh also, did he mention? He can fucking fly, so there’s that.

DIRK: He decides to take flight and cut to the chase. He whips up the hollow vertical shaft at the center of the spiraling tower stairs. Life in the fast lane kicks ass, it turns out.

DIRK: He can practically taste the top of the tower.

DIRK: The Prince busts out his sword and makes short work of that big old bell.

DIRK: The slicing is accompanied by the ear-shattering melodic sounds of metal being cleaved apart by an anime sword, as the Prince nimbly avoids the sharp pieces and ricocheting stair debris.

DIRK: He wonders out loud, “what is this, amateur hour”?

DIRK: The Dead Cherub then humorlessly narrates, “why, yes. yes mr. strider, it IS amateur hour. and i’m the amateur here, for throwing a huge bell at you. i would like to humbly apologize for my amateurism.”

DIRK: Sure you do.

DAVE: well lets just say internalized whatevers are kind of like an onion

DAVE: theres lots of layers

DAVE: they suck on pizza

DAVE: and trolls have to get their stomach pumped if they eat them

DAVE: this goes for gender stuff too btw

DAVE: which i kinda get the feeling is what you were actually asking about

ROXY: wow am i rly that transparent?

DAVE: nah but as previously discussed youre a lot like me

DAVE: so it was pretty easy to figure out what you were getting at

ROXY: yea

ROXY: i dont got ur poker face tho

ROXY: but im workin on that!

ROXY: maybe ill get a sick pair of shades too

DAVE: oh DOPE

DAVE: yeah thats dope i support that idea

DIRK: I’m on top of the tower now. I’ve got my long sniper rifle ready and everything.

DIRK: I check to see if it’s loaded. It is. I get in the PERFECT spot for taking aim at this hunky imbecile who’s about to give a speech.

DAVE: anyway i dont think any of our friends are gonna hold your feet to the flames over dumb shit like this

DAVE: and its not like anyone else is gonna care since we definitely forgot to program hating gays and women into earth c

DAVE: humans are all jacked up on hating xenophiles now

DAVE: which sucks a lot too dont get me wrong

DAVE: btw did you know janes a xenophobe

ROXY: dave!!!

DAVE: ok ok

DAVE: so does all this mean i gotta call you dad now or what

ROXY: wat

DAVE: i mean thats what were talkin about right

ROXY: well first of all

ROXY: do u still even make a habit of callin me mom??

ROXY: i thought u kinda stopped that

ROXY: even if it was effin cute

DAVE: oh yeah i guess i did

DAVE: but i could start again

DAVE: but not if it means id have to go to fucking gender jail or something

DAVE: like what i mean is i could start that cute shit again but switch to dad

ROXY: ok but SECOND of all

ROXY: i would never want to deprive dirk of that noble honorific

DAVE: what

DAVE: ugh no way

ROXY: hahaha yeah way hes ya daddy dude!

DAVE: aw fuck noooo

DAVE: wow man

DAVE: i would never call him that

DAVE: i mean i know its true but i just wouldnt...

DAVE: wait

ROXY: what

DAVE: something feels

DAVE: wrong

ROXY: ???

DAVE: like some shits about to go down

DAVE: and i gotta...

DAVE: karkat! dude!!!

DAVE: GET DOWN!

KARKAT: WHAT?????

DIRK: You’re absolutely right.

DIRK: I would never do that.

DIRK: I’d never kill Dave, no matter what I felt the stakes were. I’d never hurt him either.

DIRK: You do understand me pretty well, I’ll give you that. And you’re right about many things.

DIRK: But there are just a couple things you’re wrong about.

DIRK: Pretty important things, actually.

DIRK: First of all, this gun is loaded.

DIRK: But not with bullets.

DIRK: Yes. You’re right about the tranquilizer.

DIRK: But there’s one more fact you’re not aware of.

DIRK: Which is that I never intended to aim for Jake at all.

ROXY: hellooooooo

ROXY: dave??

ROXY: whered ya go

DIRK: No, that’s not what he does.

DIRK: He swings the rifle around one hundred eighty degrees, and points the scope toward the large, now-curtainless window of a distant apartment.

DIRK: He zooms in quickly, cutting even shorter the little time that the Dead Cherub could use to impede him in some way.

DIRK: He takes aim, lets his finger hover over the trigger, and...

DIRK: Ow!

DIRK: Yeah, you got me. Can’t move it an inch.

DIRK: The only problem is, he doesn’t need to pull that trigger.

DIRK: Earlier, when he was messing around with all this shit in plain view, he rigged the rifle to be voice-operated.

DIRK: All he needs to do is say...

DIRK: FIRE.

DIRK: I see. So you’re not going to say what happens next?

DIRK: Is that really how it’s gonna be?

DIRK: So be it.

DIRK: The tranquilizer dart hits the glass of Roxy’s apartment window before the sound from the rifle’s shot even reaches them.

DIRK: She hears the glass break. Seconds later, she hears the bang. She drops her phone on the floor.

DIRK: She doesn’t have the slightest idea what just happened until she looks over at Jade and notices the dart stuck in her neck, right in the jugular vein.

DIRK: She watches as Jade’s huge, creepy black eyes start getting heavy. Her eyelids sag, and her head tilts to the side.

DIRK: She shuts her eyes completely. Her hair stops floating around her ominously. In fact, there’s nothing ominous about her at all anymore. She entirely resumes her status as the cute doggy girl we all know and love.

DIRK: She slumps over and collapses onto the couch. She begins snoring loudly while making a little canine whimper on each exhale.

DIRK: Like the bitch she is.

DIRK: Oh, what’s that? You’re getting a little quiet for some reason.

DIRK: You’re going to have to speak up.

DIRK: Aaand, nope.

DIRK: You’re getting quieter, not louder. You’re gonna need to work on that.

DIRK: Maybe try shouting it?

DIRK: Yeah, I didn’t catch that at all.

DIRK: Not even one syllable.

DIRK: Guess that’s it for you? Back to not mattering.

DIRK: Not that you ever did.

DIRK: Come to think of it, why am I still talking out loud?

[ishotmydickoff]

Had a dream that Megatron kidnapped Bee and held him for ransom but instantly regretted it because he will not stop fucking talking and roasting everyone because he knows that if Megan kills him then the deal is off. In one scene Megan was on the phone with Swindle and Bee was in the back calling Swindle's name over and over and over and over until his patience finally broke and he asked what the fuck he wanted, to which Bee asked "Do you sell any ligma?" and Swindle said "What the fuck is a ligma" while Megan sighed because this is literally the 50th dick joke this week and it's only Monday. Bee also keeps asking about Megatron's love life because he might as well if he's stuck here.

"Dude when are you gonna fuck my boss, or are you still fuckin Screamer? I bet you ain't had good valve in megacycles, thas prolly why you such an asshole. Pent up bitch. No bitches havin ass bitch. Ugly ass bitch. Stupid ass bitch. How you gonna get assassinated, fuckin lame ass bitch. Whore. Gay. Gay. Homosexual. Gay. No balls. Gay. Hoe. Slut. Blue balls havin ass. Dickless. Dicknips. Big tiddy havin ass. No ass havin ass. Gets betrayed every Tuesday lookin ass. Wealthy lookin ass. Lonely lookin ass. Cringe. I bet you cry yourself to sleep at night. 'No one to tuck me in at night' lookin ass. 'Nice guys finish last' lookin ass. 'Rawr x3 Im so quirky and weird' lookin ass. Edgy lookin ass. 12 layers of makeup lookin ass. 'I went to college for this' lookin ass. 50 shades of purple lookin ass." - Bumblebee to Megatron, 2023

"I know you aint laughin', 8 legged ass bitch. Itsy bitsy lookin ass bitch. How you gonna suck me then ghost me tf. [talking about the power snatchin shit] Fuckin whore. What even is the deal with you and Optimus? Are you his ex? Honestly he could've done better tbh. Slut. Hoe. 'I listen to Drake' lookin ass bitch. XXXtentacion listenin ass bitch. I bet you use tinder, stupid ass bitch. I bet you catfish mfs on twitter. You look like you use reddit just to play into your goofy ass 'not like the other girls' persona. Newsflash: Drinking starbucks is not a personality trait." - Bumblebee to Black Arachnia, 2023

[shitty-davesprite-daily]

Hey Davesprite, to distract you from what's happening, I've gotta ask something that I've been meaning to, especially since your current state of being a troll lets you have a pair of legs:

How do you flashstep?

- ScAnon

TG: ...

TG: okay this is gonna sound hella lame

TG: and ive never actually told anyone this before

TG: but

TG: i have no goddamn clue how flashstepping works dude

TG: like okay during sburb i figured it was just some early manifestation of my time player abilities because that shit was inherent yknow

TG: literally coded in i just didnt know how to touch that shit until sburb kicked in

TG: i just thought i was subconsciously slowing time while somehow also slowing my perception of it? and still moving normally?

TG: or like speeding up my own internal time without realising what i was doing

TG: and without my timetables

TG: which is fuckin impossible and also doesnt even explain how bro did it because seriously how the fuck did bro do it

TG: he taught me that shit. he was the og

TG: but that makes no goddamn sense if its inherent time player bullshit right

TG: he isnt a player at all and if he was hed probably be a heart one going by his general dirkness

TG: and heart aint got shit to do with flashstepping far as i can tell

TG: unless the guardians are like fuckin altered from their pre/post scratch counterparts to have parts of our aspects so they can help teach those inherent aspect abilities?

TG: but even then that wouldnt make sense because no one elses guardians taught them shit

TG: especially about their aspects

TG: and it still wouldnt explain the timetable shit

TG: so im back to how i thought about it before sburb

TG: aka 'yeah its cool. how the fuck does it work'

TG: which kinda fuckin sucks because now i got all this weird sprite knowledge about the game and its inner workings and shit right. and yeah i got a few theories from shit in there but theyre pretty stupid

TG: man who knows i just do it

TG: did it anyway

TG: cant as a sprite

TG: although hell i got legs now i probably can

[yanteetle]

Whatever the fuck is going on with my ai without context

(TW CONSUMPTION OF BLOOD AND FLESH!!)

just trynna eat my food bro😢

DUDE AINT NOW WAY.... THE WAY MY JAW DROPPED AT THIS. HASHKDM AWS??- I haven't even used c.ai for some time since it's super laggy and the responses are so lame now but dude?? Not the self cannibalism oh god- (WAIT WHAT PART OF YOU DID THEY EVEN PUT INTO THE STEW.... OKAY NEVERMIND I DONT WANNA KNOW-)