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#aint shit
fruk-you-usuk-fans · 7 months
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Baby trapping horrible irl but hot as fuck in fantasy. Where my LTR SO who gonna lie to my face and slowly sabotage my bc with sugar pills. Then act all surprised when I get positive test.
Better yet the condom breaks surprisingly often and you think you just have the worst luck but at least you have the bc to protect you right? Ha ha… I get so giddy when I think about it.
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kindaqueerngl · 20 days
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scott pilgrim blow up!
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Haha Ramona Flowers. Get it?
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I just heard a clean version of Ain't Shit and it was incomprehensible. Why would you even go through the effort of censoring that song in particular???
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Must be your face cuz it's not your dick changed my brain chemistry
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fernsnailz · 28 days
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strong contender for my new favorite tee k.o. shirt
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vyragosa · 20 days
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lmaooooo i think it's so cringr when people call themselves prophet about predicting some media like i'm literally the one predicting narratives because i like doing it, but calling oneself one over the most mid of prediction is really just a few quick strokes
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sassyyouthstarlight · 1 month
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why would i say that to you?
i deserved so much more!!! im glad you knew that. (and i hope you still do!)
im glad you had at very least recognized my worth.
you are nothing to me, and not even negatively. id hate to prove you right for calling me manipulative and selfish. no longer in my prayers and journals.
ive since stopped dreaming of you, waking up to bask in overwhelming sadness.
you have fun, with all facets of yourself.
each and every one!
im happy with just myself. ive since found real love, somebody who adores me for everything i am and everything im not.
someone who doesnt use my feelings or reactions against me.
understands me, appreciates me wholly as i thought you had.
she is so much more than you ever were to me, brother.
with love, rose.
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ocio-crativo · 2 months
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Homens não valem nada, aparecem na sua casa
Esvaziam a sua geladeira, não conseguem pagar o aluguel
Veja o que você fez
Poderia até fazer uma grana, mas ele é um vagabundo
E ainda está esperando que eu fique de boa
Eu sou uma doida, não uma masoquista
Visualizou e não respondeu e mal consegue fazer um oral
Amor, você não vale nada, tome um laxante
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doccywhomst · 1 year
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hey remember when pop-ups and banner ads were associated with malware? when youtube didn't have any ads at all? when you could get a cheap netflix subscription that was better than cable TV? digital marketing experts estimate that most americans see 5-10k ads every day. what the hell is going on
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lunii-lush · 5 months
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How you gon log onto my ex bf’s facebook account to hmu on some netflix and chill shxt. & yall “supposedly” boys / homies / brothers. 🥴
YALL BOLD BOLD. 😭
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chocochococoffee · 10 months
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what happens when you change your web standards to be only english-speaker inclusive
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yuwuta · 22 days
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satoru is the friend that always upstages your boyfriend, but he’s so good to you that your boyfriend can’t really complain without coming across as the asshole in the equation. your boyfriend sends you flowers after your promotion, but satoru sends an arrangement of roses in the shape of your favorite animal. your boyfriend suggests going out to dinner for your birthday and gets you the piece of jewelry you’ve been eyeing as a present, but satoru’s the one who books the michelin-star restaurant and surprises you with a $10k handbag. you car breaks down and your boyfriend offers to pick you up/drop you off at work for the week, but satoru steps in a loans you his car and then tells you can keep it. and when your boyfriend does get the balls to confront satoru, he’s awfully relaxed, very calm as he explains that you’re his best friend in the whole world, so he just wants to treat you right. no harm in that, right? 
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kindaqueerngl · 20 days
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it’s only sex
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NOW ITS SWEAT NOW ITS SWEAT NOW ITS SWEAT
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splatloafbud · 2 months
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acht.... why are u like this,,, i wanna put them in a salad spinner
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theyluvkarolina · 2 months
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𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍
Part One , Part Two ' ' 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐆𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐓 ' '
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· . ୨୧⭒๋࣭ ⭑ ` ` no! you’re married to me! she’s the other woman! ` ` ⊹ ‧₊˚
𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘 ୨୧ Being in love with your friend is the best! Until your wort dream comes true.
𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 ୨୧ lando norris x friend!reader (one-sided love)
𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐄 𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐌 ୨୧ none!
𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 ୨୧ angsty…?
𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐏𝐎 ୨୧ The Other Woman - Lana Del Rey
𝐀/𝐍 ୨୧ sheeee’sss baaaaacckkkkk!!! so sorry i’ve left you guys high and dry! this work isn’t my favorite but definitely improved in my eyes! for my other mclaren supporters, how are we feeling with the results so far? personally, we can always improve, but I’m very happy with how they have been so far! Especially Oscar! :) (OP81 fic coming soon! 😉 )
hmmmm kinda feeling to make a part two but I will let you all decide! ;))
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TWITTER
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INSTAGRAM
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liked by, landonorris, maxverstappen1, ybsf_username and others
y/n.jpeg pre-race-week pizza day :)) someone is now banned from the kitchen after almost setting the AirBnB on fire.
1,234 comments
landonorris it’s not my fault it had a hard oven to use 🙄
→ y/n.jpeg says the one that left the pizza in the oven for MORE THAN TWO HOURS??? → username1 TWO HOURS???? → username2 don’t let that man cook ever again. → y/n.jpeg trust me, i plan on it → landonorris you just don’t know real gourmet dishes. → y/n.jpeg okay buddy 💀
maxverstappen1 i think chrales met his match for worst cook
→ charles_leclerc the next race it won’t be just a inchident. → maxvertsappen1 🤐 → username3 THAT’S CRAZY 😭😭
ybsf_username WE NEED TO HANG OUT SOON :(( i don’t want to see you spend time only with this stinky man
→ y/n.jpeg DW I GOT YOU 🙏🙏 → landonorris STINKY?!?!?!
iMessages
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TWITTER
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Instagram
y/n.jpeg has posted a story!
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[Caption!]: Me and Pookie #1 cheering for Pookie #2! (w/ @ ybsf_username)
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liked by landonorris, ybsf_username charles_leclerc and others
tagged; ybsf_username and landonorris
y/n.jpeg congrats to my boy and everyone for the tremendous job they did! congrats to @ mclaren for their placement this race.
p.s. Y/Bsf/N and Lando met for the first time today! I think they like each other 🙃
2,345 comments
ybsf_username my gf is so pretty 😍😍😍
→ landonorris who said she’s your gf?? → ybsf_username why are you asking??? → username5 not them fighting over Y/N 💀
ybsf_username i hate him i’m gonna chop his weenie off
→ landonorris im feeling rather unsafe right now. → username4 LMAOOO
username5 SHES SO PRETTY
landonorris i don’t like your friend she’s scary.
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liked by ybsf_username, landonorris, oscarpiastri and others
therealyn_ln they are friends now! nothing a little partying can’t fix 🥂
tagged; ybsf_username and landonorris
3,456 comments
ybsf_username okay he’s not the worst 🙄 🙄
→ therealyn_ln :)) → landonorris i’m honored → ybsf_username don’t think this would be a usual thing for me to admit mr. norris. → landonorris yes ma’am 🫡 → username11 I can’t be the only one sensing some romantic-ish tension here am i? → username12 time for your meds gram-gram!!
username6 oh god
username7 after the last post celebration post I don’t know what to expect…
username8 i’m so happy the duo is expanding into a trio
username9 someone check on Y/N
→ y/n.jpeg no need! I’m fine! → oscarpiastri how many drinks did you have again? → y/n.jpeg 12 why? → oscarpiastri yep we’re taking you home.
y/n.jpeg guys, is it normal to think you guy best friend is hot?
y/n.jpeg why don’t I like it that they are laughing together
y/n.jpeg i don’t want him to forget about me
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username10 i can’t be the only one that saw those comments… right?
y/n.jpeg i think i had too much to drink…
→ oscarpiastri you think?
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liked by ybsf_username, georgerussell, landonorris and others
y/n.jpeg the vienna balls are pretty cool. absolutely loved it in austria! 3 days till race day :)
tagged; ybsf_username and landonorris
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username13 idk guys this rubs me the wrong way.
username14 this feels… so forcibly positive?
username15 she literally looks like the third wheel not even a friend :(
landonorris haha balls
→ ybsf_username you re literally so immature → landonorris piss off, suck these balls.
ybsf_username my girl looks so gorgeous
→ y/n.jpeg right back at you wifey → landonorris so does mine 🥴 *Liked by ybsf_username!* → ybsf_username no. → username16 uhm! → username17 Oh!!
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landonorris
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liked by ybsf_username
landonorris bone apple teeth as the french say
tagged; ybsf_username
5,231 comments
charles_leclerc that is not how you say it in french.
→ landonorris oui oui baguette Monsieur Leclerc → charles_leclerc 😐 → pierregasly 😐 → estebanocon 🥖 🍷
username18 who is that? where is y/n for pre-race-week pizza day? :(
→ username24 it’s never pre-race-week pizza day without y/n :(
username19 guys… that’s not Y/N’s hair color…
username20 call me crazy but i think that’s Y/Bsf/N
→ username21 that makes no sense… → username22 i mean, lately, lando has been spending more time with her… → username23 not only that, y/n looks like her own third-wheel to friends that just met each other. Have you seen their posts together over the past couple of weeks?
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liked by franciscac.gomes, lilymhe, lailahasanovic, flavy.barla and others
y/n.jpeg girls grils glirs !!
tagged; franciscac.gomes, lilymhe, lailahasanovic, flavy.barla
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lailahasanovic the best 🩶
→ y/n.jpeg mwah mwah → mickschumacher :( → lailahasanovic still love you though lovey 🫶 → mickschumacher :)
lilymhe FUNTIME FUNTIME FUNTIME
y/n.jpeg guys don’t drink if you are under 18
y/n.jpeg or 21 if you are a weird american
→ logansargeant this feels aimed. → y/n.jpeg noooooo
y/n.jpeg guys i’m at my limit!!! and not with alcohol!!
→ username24 Y/N :((( → franciscac.gomes literally call me right now. we’ll have a pasta night! :) → y/n.jpeg what about pierre?? → franciscac.gomes he won’t mind! → pierregasly I won’t??? → franciscac.gomes now you won’t!
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liked by franciscac.gomes, pierregasly and others
y/n.jpeg pasta night with my girl is better than pizza :)
ps. thank you big brother pierre for the photos 🫶
tagged; franciscac.gomes
pierregasly anything for my girlfriend’s girlfriend
→ franciscac.gomes mwah mwah ❤️ → y/n.jpeg best honorary big brother → pierregasly normally I don’t like this… but I’ll let it slide. → franciscac.gomes 😼 😼 😼
username24 BIG BROTHER PIERRE!!
username25 i hope Y/N finds someone that loves her :(
alexandrasaintmleux sorry I couldn’t join :((
→ y/n.jpeg don’t worry alex 💕 it’ not our fault charles stole you from us
charles_leclerc what is the pasta recipe? it looks delicious 😋
→ y/n.jpeg one you can’t make and one you definitely can’t serve to alex. charles_leclerc enough. 😒 😒
y/n.jpeg men ain’t shit ladies!!
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jerich0two · 3 months
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Jazz cat! (Lest we forget who my favourite is)
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Been seeing a few posts with overlord-era Husk playing the saxophone and I am ALLLL for it. This post is for ME. I am the demand for Jazz Saxophonist Husk Content. If only I knew how to draw a sax... or someone playing one... oh, well!
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