#alas my brain went empty again.

[theminecraftbee]

one of the most frustrating moods as a writer is when you get in a mood where your brain goes "OKAY TIME TO WRITE MUST WRITE". and you go "cool i have my computer on, my keyboard in front of me, and my word processor open! what do i want to write" and your brain goes "WRITE" and you go "yeah but i can't write unless there is something i can actually write why am i completely blank when i look at my wips" and your brain goes "WRITE OR I'LL EXPLODE" and you're like. cool guess i'll explode then,

[hauntedpearl]

pyromaniac dean au always on my damn mind bc i saw this post by @autisticandroids and my brain went hmmm what if Lisa and Ben were in the pyromaniac au. and like yes okay technically i thought we were doing like a s1 thing but also this is an au so who cares no rules.

anyway. what if in between John dying and Jess murder there was like this small period of time when dean did kind of stop setting people and things on fire, but like it didn't stick and also Lisa and Ben were involved probably possibly. like v close to canon parallel. i am still thinking about why he would stop the arson, even temporarily. but I think he should. I think cas should also have started stalking him at this point!!! this is p much fully reassembling the fic events but also MMM IT'S GETTING MORE FUN I THINK!

thinking out loud again. and like with Ben it was a) dean going insane about protecting ben from hunting to the point that he is john-like with him for the opposite reasons — normal parental overcorrection in people I think tbh w you. and b) he did inadvertently cause whatever harm befell those two and then he had to, like, functionally murder them and then he just kept going like that.

w my arsonist dean, it really is just all about control and trying to ground yourself in some version of reality when you're coming unmoored. he has an obsession with fire from a young age and sets controlled fires bc he's fucked up about fire and what not having control over it can do. he becomes a firefighter bc in his head that is also a way to control it. he starts committing crimes when his father dies bc that is a trauma that kind of sends him reeling ala empty spaces dean and like doing this thing where he's orchestrating the lives of these people is doing sth to him I think. he's projecting on everyone and he's saving himself but it's like never enough.

so the only reason he would have to stop arson would be if he was able to, like, exercise that control over his life in some way. a stable relationship dynamic is good, a ritual is good, a kind of mindless droning on of life where everything is exactly as he expects it to be is good, it's grounding. I think ultimately it doesn't work bc it's not good for the other people in the situation. like!!! obviously!!! also it's just not sustainable. it's impossible to truly control every aspect of your life and dean cannot handle the slightest bit of deviation from his Plan™. like so I think the break can be slow bc he starts freaking out over small things like someone not turning off a light or not locking a door or something like that. but it's all a v mild reaction all things considered and within the realm of acceptable. but also I think Lisa is On Edge bc she's not an idiot.

thinking about what would push dean over the edge when he's in this domestic farce of a situation. like I thought about maybe ben getting into his office or something — places, things, he's designated as Personal and like Don't Fucking Touch It. and it's like bc he's in such a precarious state of mind, he's like twigs and duct tape yk? so perhaps he blows up at the kid. and it's like literally nothing. it could just be a really cool looking zeppo or whatever that's on his desk and Ben takes it bc he just wants to show off to his friends or sneak out and smoke a cigarette like a normal 12 y/o. anyway he blows up at the kid and maybe Lisa is like nope. get out. that's it. line crossed.

or maybe he does have a come to Jesus moment almost immediately and they Talk About It as a family and he's like trying to make amends or whatever. either way. glass is cracked now.

idk how but I think it would be fun if there was another fire now in this house (lolololol IM SORRY i just think everything dean touches should be on fire bc of him I think the universe can affirm that to him over and over let him hurt everyone he loves and then go crazy like!!!) and like smoke inhalation CAN cause a coma!! (well like it's cyanide and/or CO poisoning technically but yk.) so maybe ben does go into a coma. maybe dean and lisa look at each other and Lisa like lowkey knows he's doing fucked up shit but she's also like I am not killing myself and my son over this get out like i don't wanna see you I don't wanna hear from you go get your head on straight somewhere and if you think you can handle being normal then maybe we can talk but no get out.

and dean leaves bc he also senses that she senses that sth is v wrong with him and about him, and he realises that he's really just gotta find some way to fix his fucking life and he tries to change so he tries to go find sam and then he kills Jess (still not sure if the fire is on purpose or an accident!) and becomes full crazy i think.

ps: just like as a random possible addition to this already convoluted au, cas being the one to somehow laterally be involved in causing the fire and also the rescue w lisa ben (for canon parallels also bc i just think he's so funny in this fic like why isnhe doing this??? no reason he's just a freak and he's obsessed.)

pps: honestly in the state that he is!!! jess' fire can fully not be his fault, but he still is around and Fails To Save Her and sam could just end up putting the pieces together for other stuff and he connects the right dots but like his main dot is not connected to all that!! but bc he's also obsessive and crazy he's like IM GONNA KILL YOUUU

anyway. ANYWAYY.

[janetbrown711]

I Have a Couple Hundred Thoughts Running Through My Brain

Tang hasn't been doing well since his finals and his doctoral program applications went out, but agreed to go with Pigsy and his family + the kids to see the New Years Fireworks (even though he hates fireworks and is stressed out of his mind). Surely all will go as planned.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 8.5 Part 9 Part 10 Part 10.5 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13

Ao3 Link

Tang was the most normal anyone could have possibly ever been in the history of being normal.

He definitely wasn’t sweating through his damn scarf with anxiety as he wandered down to the lobby of his apartment complex four times an hour just to check if he’d been accepted into a doctorate program.

It had been a difficult month– so difficult in fact he actually pondered looking up actual study methods that weren’t just cramming– desperate times indeed.

His finals were a mess, but he managed to scrape by with mostly B+s and only one C, so that was good.

Good enough for grad programs though..?

Tang didn’t know, and he felt mortal terror every time he tried to figure that out.

But alas, that was not the only thing on his mind, because tonight was Lunar New Years, and he was going to meet Pigsy’s parents again, and therefore had to tear through his closet in an attempt to find something that would leave a… better impression than the last time they’d met.

Ugh, Tang still cringed at the memory of it all.

No matter– he was just going to do better this time– simple as that.

…Better was possible, it had to be. Tang could be better– after all, if Mr. and Mrs. Zhu already think he’s rude, then that means it can only go up from there… right?

…

Tang was going to die tonight.

With many breathing exercises, Tang selected the same scarf he always wore, plus the tang suit he had worn on his and Pigsy's official first date because– well– he’d like to say it was because it had some deep meaning, but really it was because it was the only one he owned. Besides, he looked… kinda nice in it. If he combed his hair right– which he would’ve normally but lost too many prongs the other day and the poor thing had to finally be put to rest.

Which meant he was sticking with wild hair tonight.

Yayyyy….

Tang looked himself over in the mirror and almost pondered not wearing his glasses so he wouldn’t have to confront the fact he looked like he hadn’t slept or eaten in three weeks (which he had-! Technically. Most days, anyways). He couldn’t though– he had made a promise to Pigsy and he was going to fulfill it to the best of his abilities dammit– especially after receiving such a cryptic text the other day…

Free Food <3 : When are you visiting the restaurant again?

(Tang) : Have 1 test 2mor so after new years

Free Food <3 : Oh ok

(Tang) : R u ok?

Free Food <3 : Tired.

(Tang) : Want 2 talk?

Free Food <3 : No. See you at new years.

(Tang) : c u @ New Years, <3 u

Free Food <3 : ❤️

It wasn’t helped that Pigsy didn’t stop by for the next three days, and that he messaged it on career day, which was something he’d dreaded. Shame it went poorly, but there was nothing Tang could do now except make this night marvelous and perfect.

Now was the time to relax and enjoy the festivals and all that– this was fine! It was going to be great!

…It was going to be great.

With a sigh, Tang shoved his phone, keys, and barely-not-empty wallet into his pants pocket and headed out of his apartment.

Immediately Tang was bombarded with the sounds of street music, firecrackers, and salesmen trying to give rat themed trinkets and bamboo to burn to any tourist or child who walked by, so naturally Tang just kept his eyes forward as he struggled his way further downtown.

He was stopped by about five dragon dances and three groups of children in rat ears running in front of him, but thankfully the scholar made his way to the subway and was able to jump over the turnstile without getting caught by guards and wait for his train in the overcrowded and absurdly humid underground tunnel.

People bumped into the scrawny scholar about seven times before his train to the upper east arrived and Tang scrambled for a seat to let his ankles rest while they could. There was more singing and loud music on the train, as there was a group with a ruan singing Gong Xi, which was normally fine enough, but Tang found them particularly loud tonight.

Still, after three stops Tang handed a couple yuan over and waved goodbye before heading straight to Pigsy’s place.

…Tang hated rich neighborhoods, it brought back memories he was trying to forget. Not to mention, he definitely didn’t belong, looking the way he did right now.

Deep breaths, Tang, deep breaths.

He was glad Pigsy’s apartment complex was a lot quieter on the inside than the outside, and while he didn’t love dealing with security, he was glad to be in the elevator and riding up in silence.

Be normal, Tang. You are going to be the most normal you have ever been, ever. Simple. Easy. Be normal.

The elevator dinged for Tang’s arrival and so after taking a few more deep breaths, he knocked on the door.

Be. Normal.

The door swung open alarmingly quick, and where his Pigsy should’ve been, a much, much taller–

Ah- yes.

“H-hello, Mr. Zhu,” Tang bowed a little, though didn’t know why and cringed at himself.

Pigsy’s father looked down on him before snorting and stepping aside.

“Haha, thank you– sir,” Tang smiled as he stepped inside, which was when he noticed that Mrs. Zhu was playing piano, with MK by her side singing songs.

“Didn’t bring anything?” Mr. Zhu startled the poor scholar, who practically tripped over himself.

“I-i– not this time– I-i brought the wine and lotus for the mid-autumn festival though-! This time money’s just been not happening because of school and really–”

“Pops, is that Tang?” Tang heard his savior call from the kitchen, and Tang took the opportunity to sprint away.

“Hey you– two-!” He said, regarding Mei standing over a pot of noodles and stirring with a wooden ladle, who smiled at him.

“Tang– it’s good to see you,” Pigsy hugged Tang before immediately letting go and inspecting his face. “What happened to you? You’re practically skin and bone!”

“Ahhh, you’re just exaggerating,” Tang tried to brush off.

“Your hair is– well, it certainly ain’t bad– but it’s different too,” Pigsy noted with a slight blush. “Are you okay? Have you been okay?”

“Y-yeah! What about you– you seem to have a lot going on for promising dinner would just be quick before we head out,” Tang looked around.

“Partly Ma’s fault– but I– well… I dunno, I thought maybe it’d been awhile since– bah, nevermind,” Pigsy shook his head and checked on some spring rolls.

“He missssed youuuuuuuuuuuuu,” Mei ‘whispered’, getting her a look from Pigsy that made her laugh more.

“I– yes. I’ve… missed you,” He half mumbled.

Tang laughed, “It’s okay, I missed you too,” he teased, making Pigsy blush harder as he really really checked on those spring rolls, making Mei laugh more.

Tang paused, looking at her, then at Pigsy, then at her again before shaking his head.

The girl was seven– she couldn’t– like– know. Heck– she probably didn’t even know gay people existed. He was being crazy when he needed to be normal.

Be. Normal.

“So… MK and your mom, huh? What’re they doing playing piano together?” Tang asked, taking a seat on a stool at the kitchen island.

“Ma was talkin’ all about how she and my Nana used to play and how I’d– uh– also play,” Pigsy clearly lied, much to Tang’s suspicion.

“Really?” The scholar decided to push.

“Ha, yep,” Pigsy moved on to checking on how Mei was doing with the noodles.

“What notes and fingerings are in the D Major Scale?” Tang asked, and the demon froze.

“I– uh… d-.... D?” Pigsy tried, and Tang laughed.

“You never played piano! What are you hiding from me?” He laughed.

“Nothing-! Er– nothing important, anyways, I don’t really– it’s not relevant– maybe some other time,” Pigsy waved that off and Mei jumped off her stepping stool to join Tang.

“He wouldn’t tell us either. Said he hadn’t been around a piano in years so no point in bringing ‘it’ up now since he was out of practice,” Mei informed the scholar.

“Interesting,” Tang stroked his chin just to tease his easily flustered partn–boyfr–

Shit– Did they have a label yet??? Or were they just “dating”? Has it been long enough? It had been five months– that felt kind of long. But was it enough….

“So… why’s MK interested?” Tang switched back the conversation to his original curiosity.

“Oh, well… I don’t know,” The chef scratched the back of his neck. “I think kid just likes the sound and feeling of pressing the keys, and of course Ma’ll take any opportunity to try and revive her piano teachin’ days.”

“Aw, that’s sweet,” Tang commented. “What about you Mei? You got any instrumental interests?”

“I can play the guqin, erhu, and a little bit of dizi,” Mei shrugged. “Wasn’t really my thing, but if I had to pick, guqin was the most interesting.”

“Ah– parents force you into lessons?” Tang pitied as the girl nodded. “It’s okay– my parents made me learn guqin when I was a kid, and guzheng when I was older.”

“Yeesh– I don’t think I could handle that many strings,” Mei shook her head.

“Oh trust me, I couldn’t either– that’s why they kicked me out of the orchestra,” Tang laughed. “I did always fancy the erhu though– you’re gonna have to give me tips one day.”

“Oh– okay!” Mei seemed pleasantly surprised by the suggestion, meaning Tang had won at least one conversation today (something normal to want and possible to achieve), meaning he could relax a bit.

Only a bit though, as Mr. Zhu walked in and went to the couch shortly after.

Pigsy noticed this and scoffed, “Don’t mind ‘im, he’s just here cuz Ma’s here.”

His father huffed in contempt before lighting a cigar that had been in his coat pocket.

Pigsy growled, but said nothing.

“Sooo… you excited for the fireworks, Mei?” Tang asked, successfully changing the rapidly declining energy in the room, as Mei rambled and rambled and rambled until Pigsy announced it was time and dinner was served.

And wowza– Tang thought he was going to pass out at the large swarms of food around him– everything from spring rolls to duck to dumplings to the yi mian looked amazing, which he of course expected from Pigsy but… yeah, wowza.

“Jiejie, your little guest looks like he’s going to faint,” Mrs. Zhu teased Tang as she grabbed herself some spring rolls.

“Ma, please,” Pigsy gave her a look.

“No, no– she’s right– this is– wow– it looks amazing sw– Pigsy,” Tang panic smiled.

“I– uh– thanks,” Pigsy blushed a little before clearing his throat, “Anyone want the yi mian?”

“I do!!” MK waved his hand excitedly.

“Too bad,” Pigsy winked and served himself some.

“Ah beans,” MK crossed his arms.

Tang laughed, “MK, it’s a lazy susan, just grab what’s in front of you.”

“Oh right yeah,” MK face palmed and scooped some rice for himself then Mei.

The second food was able to hit Tang’s lips, he just about melted into a puddle in his seat– right before his hunger kicked in and he started just about scarfing it all down.

Mrs. Zhu laughed at that again, this time asking, “Pigsy, are you sure this fellow of yours isn’t actually a pig demon?”

“M-ma!!” Pigsy exclaimed while Tang choked on his food.

“Oh! Right– that’s rude isn’t it? Hm,” His mother shook it off jovially while Pigsy patted Tang’s back.

“Fellow? What’s a fellow?” MK looked at Pigsy and Tang.

“Friend, MK. It just means friend,” Pigsy sighed as Tang regained composure.

“Oh right– my mistake,” Mrs. Zhu looked at Pigsy and Tang once over before shrugging to herself, sending a wave of panic down Tang.

Normal, Tang. Act normal, think normal, be normal.

Especially because Mr. Zhu is looking right at you ahahahahhaahahhaha—

Tang kept his eyes forward and ate at his best attempt of a normal pace to eat food (though certainly chugged a bit of the jiao wine).

Tang sighed a massive breath of relief when dinner finally came to an end, and Tang could excuse himself to the restroom, where he promptly stared at himself in the mirror.

“Okay Tang, you survived dinner,” He whispered to himself. “Now all you gotta do is survive fireworks. Easy peasy. Totally chill and normal and pbbt– whatever.”

Oh god, he was totally tipsy.

Well… it was better than completely drunk, so Tang would just have to roll with it.

“Tang? You–uh– alright in there?” Pigsy knocked on the door, causing Tang to jump and knock over some soap.

“I-i– yes! It’s fine! I’m fine! Thanks Pigsy,” Tang panicked to fix it before looking at himself in the mirror.

What a mess.

He cleaned his glasses, mumbling the whole time before seeing if that made him look any better and– yeah, nope. Nothing could save him now.

Welp. Here goes nothing.

He opened the door, greeted by a worried looking Pigsy, who examined him up and down.

“Are you okay?” He asked bluntly.

“Of course, Pigsy. Now c’mon– I don’t think I heard Mei say she wanted to see a lion dance,” He took Pigsy’s hand with zero hesitation and headed for the door.

“I– uh– okay,” Pigsy laughed but only a little.

“UGH– can we go now? I don’t wanna miss a lion danceeeee,” Mei complained.

“Told ya,” Tang snorted, stumbling a little.

“Right– everyone got coats?” Pigsy rolled his eyes with a smile. MK and Mei nodded, but that made Tang pause because he most certainly did not.

Tang thought perhaps Pigsy wouldn’t notice, but then MK loudly pointed out he didn’t and all eyes were on him.

“Tang– it’s new years, where’s your coat?” Pigsy looked around.

Mrs. Zhu tilted her head. “Do you not have one, dear?”

Mr. Zhu just looked at him.

“Ah– it’s fine, it’s all fine– I don’t need one– I am very resistant to cold actually,” Tang lied with the kind of confidence that could only arise with intoxication.

“Then why do you wear a scarf all the time?” MK tilted his head.

“That is purely a… fashion statement,” He lied again.

“Ah geez, I’d offer you one of mine, Tang, but uh… I don’t think they’d fit,” Pigsy scratched his neck.

“It’s fine, Pigsy, really,” He smiled at the demon.

“If you say so,” Pigsy looked him up and down again before shaking his head. “Let's roll out then.”

And roll out they did, right into the bustling and unreasonably loud streets of uppercrust Megapolis. Lights and lanterns and fire were decorating nearly every corner, as well as people selling flowers, jade souvenirs, and rat themed memorabilia, just as it had been on his way up, but these ones were even more overpriced.

“Ooo! Ooo! Ooo! Can I get a rat plushie Pigsy? Can I? Can I? Can I?” Mei jumped up and down and pointed to a stall.

“I– uh–”

“Oh I’ll buy one for you dear,” Mrs. Zhu interrupted her son and suddenly she and Mei were off.

“Uh… okay,” Pigsy blinked. “You want anything MK?”

MK looked around and shrugged. “Call me when it's the year of the monkey.”

Tang laughed. “That won’t be for awhile, MK.”

“Ah beans,” MK crossed his arms and looked at the stuffed animals again before shaking his head again. “I’m fine. Don’t need one.”

“Alright, let me know if you change your mind,” Pigsy accepted and they waited for Mei, who returned with not only a plushie, but rat eats, stick on whiskers, a keychain, and two sparklers.

Something about that… struck Tang. He couldn’t say what or why, but there was now a void in his chest he hadn’t previously been aware of.

Normal, Tang. Be normal.

“Sooooo– anyone interested in seeing any–” Tang was interrupted by the deafening sound of teenagers lighting firecrackers on the street nearby, causing Tang to run his fingers against his scarf and wince.

“Ooo! I wanna light firecrackers!” MK shouted. “Can we get some of those Pigsy?”

“Yeah that’s gonna be a no,” Pigsy cringed and guided them closer to where a lion dance was getting started.

The kids seemed satisfied, but all Tang could think about was all of the loud instruments and cracking and screaming as it all started to just swirl in his brain. That, combined with the half-frozen rain beginning to fall, and a bad feeling in his stomach made for a rather unpleasant experience for the poor scholar. Not that he’d let anyone know this, of course– that’d be just beyond rude. And Tang wasn’t rude. He was pleasant. He was nice.

He was normal.

Besides, it was still fun to watch the truly admirable talent of the dancers as the tail ends would lift the heads to show the lion “standing on its hind legs” and then watch it jump from platform to platform, while moving in perfect sync. Heck– it brought back memories to when he had told his mother he wanted to be a lion dancer when he was older, but she had said–

…

Tang kept watching.

At one point, a bubble machine turned on and suddenly MK and Mei were both running around trying to pop them while also cheering on the dancers, and Tang just kind of looked around to see if there was anywhere to sit, as his ankle was starting to flare up. However, before he could get a chance, confetti poppers went off as the lions unfurled banners in their mouths calling for good fortune and for a prosperous new year, which made everyone clap and cheer. Tang wanted to pull his ears off, but clapped along nonetheless.

At least it meant the dance was over and MK and Mei arrived with fistfulls of confetti.

“Pigsy! Can I keep this?!” MK showed the confetti to his guardian.

“Kid, you aren’t gonna remember where you got that from in a week,” Pigsy shook his head, “it’s best to just toss it out.”

“Awww, but it’s so pretty! And it’ll just go in the trash!” MK whined.

“That’s the life of confetti for you,” Pigsy shrugged. “C’mon, the fireworks are gonna start soon and I want us to find a good spot.”

Finally sitting down, thank goodness.

“Oh-! But first…” Mrs. Zhu winked at the children before running off to another stall, making her husband roll his eyes.

MK blinked. “What’s she getting?”

Pigsy sighed, “Probably somethin’ nobody needs.”

Tang didn’t know if it’d be rude to agree but he sure wanted to with how much he was starting to get a headache and ankle ache and everything ache. But no, Tang was trying to make a good impression and just kept running his hands on his scarf over and over and over again.

He really wanted this night to end already.

Mrs. Zhu didn’t seem like she would return for awhile though, making Pigsy on edge while Tang tried rocking back and forth to see if it would relieve any of his anxiety or aches, but nothing was working which only caused it to increase while they all just stood there wishing they could be sitting down.

When Mrs. Zhu returned though, it was clear what took her so long– as she was holding two bouquets of chrysanthemums with either a little jade monkey and dragon attached and a little note card with fancy calligraphy.

“Ah– Ma, that’s… very kind,” Pigsy grimaced.

“Jiayi, you’re going to spoil them,” Mr. Zhu said his longest sentence of the night with a huff.

“Oh you hush now, Hangleng,” Mrs. Zhu waved him off and handed the bouquets to the children, leaving poor Mei struggling with all her merchandise.

Pigsy sighed. “Here Mei– I’ll carry some,” he offered, and the girl sloppily handed over literally everything except the unlit sparklers, which she noticed.

“Piggy, can we light these?” Mei asked.

Pigsy was clearly prepared for this, looking up in dramatic thought before suddenly sucking air through his teeth, “Sorry kiddo, but you need a lighter for those and I don’t have one on me.”

“Ah nuts,” Mei kicked the ground.

“Sorry kiddo, maybe next year you can use the dangerous sparklers,” Pigsy patted her back when suddenly Mr. Zhu reached into his pocket and brought out his lighter.

“Woah– really?” Mei’s face lit up, meanwhile Pigsy looked like he was going to kill his dad, to a still sort of tipsy Tang’s amusement.

Mr. Zhu just rolled his eyes and Mei took the lighter.

“Ack– here– how’s about I just–” Pigsy sighed in frustration over his own lack of hands.

“Here– hand it to me Mei,” Tang offered instead, which Pigsy still wasn’t loving but Mei handed it over and Tang flicked it on with ease.

One by one MK and Mei lit their sparklers, and the pair instantly became mesmerized.

“This is the coolest thing ever!” MK’s grin was so wide it looked like it might fall off his face, making Tang laugh.

“Just don’t touch it– it’s still fire,” Pigsy warned.

“Psssssshhhhhhhhhhh, I’m a dragon, I think I’ll be fine,” Mei proudly proclaimed, trying to draw a star with the light.

After that the two of them tried spelling their names and drawing animals, but mostly just drew scribbles while the adults tried to usher them to a designated firework watching area– though they were already starting to get rather full.

“Ah nuts!” Mei cursed as her sparkler went out and she immediately turned and ran to her guardian. “Piggy, can I get another one?”

“No.” Pigsy huffed, giving a look to his parents.

“Man,” Mei kicked rocks and MK did too as his also went out.

“Oh come on, Jiejie, it wouldn’t hurt them,” His mother disagreed, looking around.

“Ma, please don’t run off again,” Pigsy gave his mother a look.

“Don’t back talk your mother, Bajie,” His father fought back and alarms started ringing in Tang’s head.

“Ah– guys, maybe let’s just go sit down and–” Tang tried to intercede, but Mei interrupted him.

“Oh! oh! They’re selling fa gao! Pigsy can we–” Mei loudly proclaimed before MK interrupted her too and soon it was all just a hot mess of everyone talking at the same time except Tang who was standing around like a total dolt and was completely out of touch for where his role was supposed to be in the dynamic. It was like he could hear but couldn’t at the same time– especially as drums were blaring and kids were yelling and people were talking on microphones and–

An ear piercing whistling sound broke above all the noise though, interrupting Tang’s train of thought/panic until a loud pop arrived, with many crackling sounds afterwards– meaning the fireworks had started.

Great– great, great, great, great was all Tang could think as he suddenly started rocking back and forth as he pulled harder and harder on his scarf. It at least stopped the arguing (thank the great sage) but that didn’t stop the chills from running across Tang’s body and his burning desire to somehow get out of here– but he couldn’t because he was being normal, dammit.

“That’s what– ugh,” Pigsy rubbed his forehead, before turning to Tang and having to take a step back. “Woah there– are you– okay?” Pigsy immediately worried.

“What? No– no, I’m fine! Really, haha,” He lied, his hands moving faster as his eyes darted to the sky where another firework went off, causing him to cover his ears instinctively.

“Ma? Pops? Can you watch MK and Mei a second? Pigsy asked.

“What-?! No! I’m fine Pigsy! Y-you don’t– your parents are guests! Th-they should be–” Tang was going to protest more but more fireworks went off and he wanted nothing more than to shrivel up and die.

“We’ll watch them dear, you take him back home,” Mrs. Zhu patted her son's arm as Mr. Zhu looked Tang over for the fifty millionth time.

“Whaaaat? You’re leaving?” MK looked at Tang with childlike heartbreak.

“I-i– ah–” He tried to remove his hands from his ears, but another firework went off.

“C’mon Tang,” Pigsy tried to take his arm, but Tang snatched it away– before realizing that wasn’t normal and he was being a freaking weirdo right now and– he was supposed to be impressing Pigsy’s parents– why was he like this-? Why couldn’t he just–

Another boom had Tang nearly jump out of his own damn skin, which was followed by a bigger headache and more pain and confusion and Taang knew he needed to go home if he didn’t want to make a complete and total embarrassment out of himself.

He looked back at Pigsy, who didn’t know what to do– he even looked a little heartbroken, which only made Tang feel worse, but well– he needed his help– he was not going to make it through these crowds alone, that was for sure.

“Tang..?” Pigsy asked though, and Tang managed to focus on him– though his hands returned to running along his scarf.

“L-lets– uh– go home,” Tang managed to say, wincing as another firework was set off. Pigsy more carefully offered an arm this time, and Tang took it and clung to it like a lifeboat.

The pair didn’t talk, even as they got further and further from the group, as Pigsy just silently patted his arm whenever another firework went off or a gong crashed or any other sudden noise occurred. Tang felt like such a child for needing such comfort, but was thankful to have it anyways– he didn't deserve Pigsy sometimes.

When they arrived at Pigsy’s place, the bright lights made Tang hiss as he entered, and out of instinct he went straight to the bathroom, closing the door and turning off the light to just sit in the dark for a little bit, trying his best not to worry about Pigsy pacing just outside the door.

After a minute or so though, Pigsy knocked quietly.

“Y-y-yes?” Tang managed to talk despite feeling too exhausted for speech.

“Do you– uh… want tea or something? Pigsy asked.

“Yeah that sounds… nice,” Tang agreed and he heard Pigsy shuffle away and in and out of rooms.

Ugh, Tang was such a loser. What was this? A highschool party? He should’ve been over all this– whatever it was. He was an adult and doctoral program applicant. His parents said it was just nerves when he got like this– was this nerves? It was nerves, right? Nerves plus alcohol maybe. But nerves for sure.

It took about five minutes for Tang to realize his heart had stopped pounding and his thoughts were mostly normal– if far and few between– though that also made him realize he was exhausted.

Fun.

He remained in the bathroom for another five or so minutes before he decided it was time to emerge from the cold dark bathroom and back into reality.

When he opened the door he was surprised to find the lights were a lot dimmer than before– maybe Pigsy had one of those fancy dimmers right people houses could have.

Either way, what a relief.

It was also rather toasty, which was good because while the bathroom was refreshing, his sweat mixed with rain water made his clothes cling to him and he was absolutely freezing by now.

When he got to the kitchen, he saw Pigsy had taken off his own jacket and Tang suit, revealing just a thick white tank top that he wore under, making Tang blush as he stared for just a moment.

After a while he shook out of it and noticed the demon also had a thick fluffy blue robe laid over a stool along with a bottle of ibuprofen.

“Is… that for me?” Tang asked curiously.

“Oh-! I– uh– thought you might want to take off your shirt since it’s all– uh– wet and stuff– but only if you’re comfortable,” Pigsy confessed, which made Tang laugh a little.

“Thanks,” he smiled at Pigsy tiredly before going over to it and taking off his shirt (which had no tank top underneath) before instantly regretting it when he heard Pigsy make a worried noise.

“Ah– um– Sorry– it’s just– how well have you been eatin’ these three weeks? You’re– skinnier.” The chef apologized as Tang quickly put on the robe.

“Well it's– um–” Tang didn’t turn around, even after he was very wrapped up in the massive robe that was a borderline blanket on him.

Tang sighed. “It’s harder during finals because I don’t have time for surveys or whatever when I need to cram for exams.”

“Tang, you should’ve told me,” Pigsy said softly.

“I know, I know– I… know,” Tang fiddled with the robe’s belt. “It’s just… embarrassing, sometimes.”

“Yeah, I can get that. But still, I’m nothing if not your free food supplier, so you shouldn’t feel bad for asking– especially if you really do need it,” The demon pointed out as Tang took a seat at the island once more.

“You’re more than a food supplier Pigsy,” Tang defended himself.

“I didn’t mean it like that– I meant it more like ‘you can always ask’ kind of way– you know?” Pigsy’s face flushed.

“Yeah, I do,” Tang chuckled a little, making Pigsy blush more before he finally took in the sight of the human in his robe and laughed.

“That thing is swallowing you alive,” He said as the kettle started to squeal and he quickly turned it off.

“Ha– yeah,” Tang noticed it too. “It’s nice though– makes me feel all cozy,” he hugged himself a little for emphasis.

“Glad my size could be of service to you,” Pigsy joked, pouring hot water into two mugs.

“Oh please, your size is always serving me,” Tang wiggled his eyebrows, making Pigsy turn red as a tomato in seconds, making the scholar burst into laughter.

“You really do get flustered easily! That’s fun,” Tang laughed more as Pigsy rolled his eyes and looked through his tea selection.

“Yeah, yeah– what kind do you want?” He asked, clearly trying not to think about the comment.

“Oolong.”

“Smart,” Pigsy winked and pulled out two bags and promptly began brewing them.

Silence filled the kitchen, and Tang was left back with his more… uncomfortable thoughts.

“Do you… think your parents like me?”

Wow Tang, really smooth. What a question. You are the king of self confidence.

“I think I’ve certainly dated far worse people,” Pigsy snorted, before adding– “not that I’ve told them we’re dating, of course.”

“Right, yes,” Tang laughed a little, though tension still didn’t leave his shoulders and he rubbed the robe belt between two fingers.

Pigsy looked at him and brought the mug over. “Does their opinion matter to you?”

“I– well– this sounds really stupid, but all day the only thing I’ve been really thinking about is impressing your parents but right now everything is just such a mess– especially back at my place– so I–” Tang sighed. “Yes. It matters a lot.”

“Oh…” Pigsy half-whispered as he sat next to him on a stool. “I… they do like you, I’m sure of that much– Pop’s is just like that around everyone.”

“Oh I can believe that,” Tang joked and took a sip of tea, embracing the warmth as it traveled through his body.

“Yeah, and Ma– well… she just kinda says things a lot and I’m pretty sure she only ever means twenty percent,” Pigsy shrugged and took a sip too.

“Better than a mom who rarely talks at all,” Tang shrugged.

“Yeah, probably,” The chef agreed.

Tang listened a bit more to the distant sound of fireworks and crowds cheering below as he took another long sip of tea.

“I’m sorry for acting so weird today. I swear it was just because I wanted to impress your parents– no other reason,” He said, eyeing the ibuprofen.

“Yeah, no, I get it,” Pigsy smiled softly. “Plus I get weird around lights and sounds sometimes too. Heck– my ma used to complain about how I wouldn’t like particular blankets or pants because I said they “felt yucky” – whatever that means,” he snorted.

Tang laughed too. “Yeah– I’m normally better though, but I guess today– holidays like this in general, too– are just… difficult sometimes.”

“Yeah, maybe next year we’ll just stay inside,” Pigsy suggested.

“Next year?” Tang blinked.

That made the chef sit a little straighter. “What? Do you think you won’t want to be here next year or–”

“Oh– heavens no-! I just mean– I– you’d want me here next year?” Tang quickly clarified.

“Of course– Tang, I want you to visit every year,” Pigsy placed a hand on Tang’s shoulder, stroking it with his thumb.

“O-oh– then– yeah, that’d be nice,” it was now Tang’s turn to blush a deep shade of red and he quickly went back to his tea, which he swore felt like was healing every fiber of his being.

“...Tang?” Pigsy asked, tapping his fingers against his mug.

“Yes?”

“Do… do you like dating and being with… me?” Pigsy asked quietly.

“Of course I do! I love every second being with you– you’re so wonderful and brave and strong and handsome and– heavens, I’m rambling,” Tang caught himself as Pigsy chuckled.

“Good, I was just– wondering,” The demon looked away.

“Why?”

“You… I dunno, you seem to think you won’t be around here long,” Pigsy shrugged.

“Oh– I didn’t mean it like that– I just–...”

“...You just what?”

‘I just don’t know what the heck we are yet.’

Tang drank more of his tea before glancing at Pigsy, who was looking back at him worriedly.

With a deep breath, Tang mustered all of the courage inside himself to ask– “Are we… like… boyfriends?”

“What? Of course,” Pigsy blinked. “Did… we not agree on that before?”

Tang blinked before bursting into laughter, almost spilling his tea as he did.

“Oh heavens me– here I’ve been all worried about if you wanted to be ‘official’ and here you are already thinking we are,” the scholar had to hold his sides.

“Fuck– we really didn’t say that then, did we,” Pigsy was deeply embarrassed. “Man, I’m sorry– I have no idea where I got that from.”

“No-! No, it’s fine, really,” Tang assured with a big smile. “I just– it’s funny now that it’s in retrospect.”

“Ah, that’s good,” Pigsy relaxed and laughed a little too. “Had me scared there for a second too.”

“Now we’re even,” Tang grinned as he took another sip.

“That’s for sure,” The demon laughed a bit more.

Tang smiled at the sentiment for only a minute, before something else crawled to the forefront of his mind.

"Pigsy–” Tang blurted, instantly getting the chef’s attention.

Fuck– he hadn’t meant to actually get his attention, but now…

“Do you think I’m… normal?”

"What… do you mean?" Pigsy tilted his head a little.

"I-i… I don't know," Tang looked down at his half empty mug. "Sometimes I just– I feel like somethings wrong with me but I can't say what or why or how– it's like I can't help it…"

"Tang, I don't think anything's wrong with you," Pigsy reached his hand towards the scholar.

Tang winced a little. “I… thanks, but… I don’t know,” he sighed.

Pigsy chewed on his lip a bit before sighing. “Look, even if you aren’t “normal”, that doesn’t make you less than, you know? You’re every bit a person as anyone else, and anyone’d be lucky to have you in their life,” Pigsy’s hand inched closer.

“Like my parents?” Tang muttered.

“Like Me n’ MK n’ Mei, Tang,” Pigsy finally touched Tang’s hand.

“I-i don’t know– I’m not really– like– you’re a total natural at this parent thing, you know that?” Tang tried to brush off.

“Tang, the kids are lucky to have you in their lives. It’s good for them to have a human in their life that’s a bit odd– it’s healthy,” Pigsy insisted.

“I… guess,” Tang shrugged. “I just– I’m not– I wish things were just… easier, sometimes. Like– even doing things like talking or looking people in the eyes– it’s al stupid difficult and it isn’t for most people and I just–” Tang took a breath.

“I just wish I could be normal so that your parents would like me and I wouldn’t feel like a dolt around the kids so often and even around you sometimes,” He sort of chuckled, but it was more out of anxiety than anything.

“But that’s what makes you you, Tang, and I wouldn’t change that for the world,” Pigsy gave his hand a squeeze.

Tang squeezed right back, but didn’t say anything, drinking more tea with his free hand.

Another thought.

“What if one day, I– I just– what if it’s too much? What if even you don’t wanna deal with it– what if I-i just end up driving you crazy? What then?” Tang’s voice cracked.

“That won’t happen, Tang.”

“You don’t know that,” He let go of Pigsy’s hand.

He seemed to successfully corner Pigsy at that for a moment, as the chef went quiet in contemplation while Tang waited to see what he’d say next (if anything at all).

Probably not. Tang usually ruined these kinds of things– mostly unintentionally. Great.

“Tang, I’m not normal. You realize that?” The chef suddenly asked.

“I– what?” Tang was set back.

“Tang, I’m literally a demon.”

“I– yeah, but–”

“No ‘but’s. If you’re weird, I’m weird,” He argued. “And weirdos like us belong together.”

Tang looked at Pigsy, taking in his soft expression before kissing his cheek, which Pigsy responded to by kissing him on the lips, which Tang responded by hugging him tight, which startled the demon.

Pigsy didn’t say anything though, stroking his back in a soothing rhythm as Tang felt himself begin to melt in his arms.

Pigsy always felt so safe– Tang didn’t know why he tended to hesitate. He loved him– he loved him deeply.

He wanted to stay like this forever.

“Pigsy, I don’t want to go home,” Tang confessed.

“You don’t have to,” Pigsy instantly assured.

Tang kissed him again.

“I want to stay here tonight, Pigsy,” Tang repeated.

“Okay,” Pigsy kissed him again.

“Can I..?” Tang asked and it was then the chef’s face lit with recognition.

“O-of course-! If you–uh– want to,” Pigsy cleared his throat a bit.

Tang laughed a little, kissing him once more and trying to get off the stool, only to be instantly reminded of how much his legs– more specifically his ankles– hurt.

“Ah– are you okay?” Pigsy backed up.

“I’m fine, just my stupid weak ankles,” Tang shrugged.

“Well we can’t have that now can we,” Pigsy got an idea and smirked.

“What are you– oh my–!” Tang exclaimed as Pigsy suddenly scooped him up.

“I don't want you on your feet more than necessary. Lying on your back is more relaxing,” Pigsy explained himself, moving towards his room.

“Oh?” Tang smirked with a raised eyebrow.

Pigsy smirked right back before kissing him and carefully opening his door with one hand, and the pair continued to kiss until Pigsy kicked the door shut carefully with his foot and even long, long after that.

What a night.

[sugakoni]

sunflower. (keiji shinogi x fem!oc)

being forced to go to a flower shop by his therapist wasn't something keiji thought would happen, but he would be damned if he didn't say that it was the best thing to ever happen to him. meeting the personified equivalent of sunshine and sweetness, he regrets not trying to find her sooner.

-------

warnings for this chapter: halucinations, agoraphobia, therapy session oops because keiji is traumatized, small mentions of the death game but wont really delve in till later in the series. also, no one died. i cant handle that shi.

wc: 3408 | archive of our own

(a/n) hey yall.. so i am writing again, woot woot! i am really digging your turn to die and hazbin hotel right now, but as of lately yttd has been consuming every single bit of my writing brain TuT. This is an oc fic, sorry about that yall but Yuzu is my baby and I hope you all grow to like her as much as Keiji does in this fic lmao. This is chapter one, and as more chapters go out, there will be edits on this post. as always, thank you for your support for the last 3 years and im glad to be back <3

(chapter under the cut!)

It wasn't like Keiji to leave his apartment much. Sure, he would go out if the others begged him to. He would go to his therapy appointments, but soon go home to try to find his own form of solace while his thoughts slowly but surely consumed him. He wasn't alone by any means most of the time, a red, painstakingly familiar man would always appear in the corner of his eyes. It got better though, medication, therapy… but that sense of self loathing for what he had done, what he could've done differently, always loomed over him like an unwanted cloud on a day you really want the sun to shine.

But, alas, today was not one of those days. Keiji Shinogi, at his therapy appointment that day, had mentioned that there was a new flower shop that had opened near his apartment that offered painting lessons. He was intrigued by it, to say the least, that a flower shop would be offering something like that. His therapist just chuckled, saying that maybe it was his subconscious telling him to go out and try something new. 

And now…

He was standing outside of this tiny flower shop, his anxiety clawing at him as if he was doing something either incredibly stupid or incredibly wrong. He sighed, moving to rub the back of his neck before he opened the door to the shop. It was empty… well, except for the vibrant colors of flowers displayed on multiple tables in the front room. Sunflowers seemed to be the main display for the day, and the sunlight captured them beautifully.

“... Helloooo?” Keiji hummed out quietly, hoping he didn't just intrude if the flower shop wasn't opened at all and he was making it up in his head. After a few seconds of his mind trying to pry him away, a short woman who looked awfully familiar to someone he was close to stepped out from the back.

His eyes lingered on her for a moment, heart racing a bit as he took her in for a second. Why was he feeling like this? Why were his ears feeling hot? Hands clammy? Keiji wanted to leave, but he stayed glued to his spot. And that is when she smiled and his own brain lit up.

“Oh, hello! Welcome to Kirigami’s, your local… uh… flower shop?” she said kind of confusingly, moving to play with a strand of her wavy hair. “S-sorry… you're the first customer of the day…”

Keiji blinked, hands going to his hips for a moment as he stood in thought. “Uh, thank you?”

The girl's face immediately went into a pout, biting at her lip and that face looked so familiar. Keiji was near losing his mind. 

“My name is Yuzu! Don't be a stranger, you can move from your spot you know!” Yuzu teased quietly, beckoning him to actually take another wide step into the shop and he happily obliged. Sweet. Too sweet. Why was he over analyzing a girl who ran a flower shop?

“What brings a man like you into a place like this?” She then added, her hands going to grab a pair of scissors while she tidied up some dead leaves on some of her plants. Keiji pursed his lips together.

“Jus’ wanted to see what ya had, I guess,” Keiji explained, a small smile creeping up on his face. God, she was cute.

Yuzu hummed to herself, smiling wide again as she turned to look at Keiji. “Trying to look for some flowers for the miss’s? Any kind in particular?” She asked, her smile faltering a bit as she said the word miss’s. Keiji noticed the change in her demeanor but didn't press it.

“Ah, unfortunately no miss’s for me… just have a certain liking towards… uncharacteristic things?” Keiji spoke and Yuzu gave another giggle, placing her scissors down and moving to take the apron she had off. Keiji watched as she moved to straighten her headband, his arms now crossing in front of him.

“No miss’s? You look like quite the catch! And, ‘uncharacteristic’... pfft,” she joked, her chest now slightly puffed up as she felt the need to be more professional. Sometimes Keiji wished he didn't join the police force so he could see people just as normal people.

“Anyway, I told ya my name, what's yours?”

Keiji’s eyes widened a bit, feeling bad now that he didn't even introduce himself to her when she did to him. “Sorry about that. My name is Keiji Shinogi… Local forensic specialist,” Keiji hummed out and Yuzu gave another smile. Was she always this cheery?

“Last name, huh? Guess it's only fair I tell ya mine. Tazuna, Yuzu Tazuna. If that means we are on a full name basis,”-Keiji desperately wanted to be on a first name, even a nickname basis- “Sorta professional for a flower shop, huh?”

Keiji snapped out of his thoughts for a moment when she said Tazuna. Now that is why she is familiar. Possibly an older sibling to Joe, who… he unfortunately met in the death games that still lingered in his mind. He wondered how Joe was doing now, especially since it had been about two years since he had seen most of the people from the game, minus Reko, Nao, and Gin.

“Hello? Earth to Keiji Shinogi?” Yuzu asked with a giggle and a hand wave, and Keiji let his eyes shift into focus and look at her. Yellow suited her.

“Sorry, just got lost in thought… ya have the same last name as someone I know, wasn't expecting that to be completely honest…”

“Ohh! You probably know Joe, I'm assuming?” Yuzu asked, her smile faltering a bit. “Or my dad? Did you even work with my dad? Surely not, you look very young! Oh, sorry, I'm rambling.”

Keiji’s heart tensed a bit, letting out a sigh afterwards as his eyes went back to the sunflower that was beside her. Yuzu hummed to herself.

“No, it's Joe that rang a bell… haven't seen him in years… hopefully he is doing well?”

“He's doing great! He got into a good college, and he has the sweetest boyfriend!” Yuzu chirped and Keiji gave a nod. Boyfriend, huh? Joe never pegged him as the type…

Keiji watched silently as Yuzu began to move around her shop, just idly looking here and there at spots on her flowers. He bit at the inside of his cheek, seeing the looming figure again that he desperately didn't want to see. It was standing right beside her though, and he couldn't help it.

“What brings you here though, Keij? Just pokin’ around?” Yuzu broke the silence, and he snapped out of the hallucination just like that. Her voice was calming, like she genuinely cared. And that was enough to break that bit of fear he had.

“Yep, ya caught me. I live right down the street, saw ya all working on getting this set up. Just wanted to see what was up,” Keiji lied, not really wanting to admit that his therapist put this shop as one of his to-do lists for his bit of agoraphobia he had after everything he had been through.

And God, he was thankful they did.

“Well! I sure do love the company!” She gleamed. Keiji gulped, he sincerely felt out of place like this. But a thought soon came to his mind.

The people who were in the death game were all planning on some sort of meet up that night. Mostly, that was one reason why his therapist wanted him to step out of his comfort zone before the meet up, so his agoraphobia didn't act up so much while he was supposed to be having a relaxing time with people who all knew and had dealt with the trauma he had just the same. Since Yuzu and Joe were siblings, surely it would be fine to ask her if she would like to come over-

“Since you and Joe are related, I’m assuming that you wouldn't mind if I asked ya to hang out with us and our friends?” Keiji blurted out, immediately facepalming mentally afterwards. Yuzu blushed, playing with her fingers for a moment as she considered.

“I'd love that… typically strangers don't ask me to go do things immediately, but, if Joe knows you he must trust you, right?” Yuzu asked, Keiji giving a small nod in agreement. “Well, alright! Here,” she moved to write down her number on a sticky note from the front counter. “Just text me the details, and I'll head over there after I get done here!”

Keiji moved to grab the sticky note offered, and his fingers brushed slightly against her’s. His facade was almost breaking, and he chuckled at the bright flash of red that overtook the sweet girl in front of him’s face.

“Okie-dokie. I'll text ya the info once I get back to my apartment… hope to see you there, Tazuna~” He cooed lightly and Yuzu rolled her eyes playfully. 

“Wouldn't miss it for the world, Shinogi.”

—------

Yuzu was excited, truly, to be going out and meeting new people. Especially Joe’s friends, and she trusted the people Joe had connections with. They always seemed to be down to earth, and Yuzu enjoyed that about them. After meeting Shin, albeit she met her brother’s boyfriend at a… stupidly inconvenient time, she enjoyed his company and was glad to have him in her life as well.

She tided up what she needed to at the shop, always having an extra change of clothes just in case dirt, water, or paint had gotten onto her during the day, and changed into them. Contrary to what she normally wore, it was a pair of jeans and a nice shirt, still wearing her sneakers that she had on during the work day.

Her phone was now in her hand, rereading the text that Keiji had sent her about an hour prior to her shop closing. She blushed, rolling her eyes again as she read it.

‘Here’s the address. Hope to see you there, sunshine.’

Yuzu couldn't help but admit that Keiji was an attractive man. He was alluring, and his personality seemed a bit closed off. She wondered what was under that exterior… she wondered how his hands felt, how soft his hair was. She had only met him today! She had no idea why these thoughts loomed.

You like someone again, huh, Tazuna? 

That annoying voice was ringing in her head again, and she felt her heart start to race. She glanced up from her phone, being met with the blood stained silhouette of her best friend. 

I wonder what he would think if he knew what you did to me.

You don't deserve happiness.

You got me killed, remember?

Do you think someone like you deserves that?

“Please… Himadi… leave,” Yuzu gasped out, squeezing her eyes shut and moving to run a hand through her hair. When she opened her eyes again, tears fell but her surroundings were normal. No Himadi in sight.

“Anyway…” she muttered to herself, sending Keiji a text that she was on her way and moving to leave and lock up her shop. Yuzu began her walk towards the apartment number that Keiji had sent her, hoping that it was his apartment number, since it was so close.

After a ten minute walk, she finally stood at the door to the apartment she was sent the address to. A few cars were parked on the curb in front, assuming that everyone was already there. Yuzu knocked gently on the door, her little body shaking as she felt her anxiety creep up.

A few seconds went by and the door was opened, but she was met with no one. She then glanced down, being met with a boy who was donning a cat like outfit. Her heart swelled.

“Myaaa, Joe’s sister?!” The kid exclaimed, his eyes widening a bit. Yuzu raised an eyebrow. “Gin, what?!” The familiar voice of Joe rang, and soon she was met with her brother standing at the door.

“Yuzu! Holy moly, what are you doing here?”

“I invited her,” Keiji’s voice rang from behind them. Joe snapped his head back momentarily, before looking back at Yuzu with a soft face. 

“Can I come in…? It's kinda chilly out here, ya know…” 

“Oh! Yeah, sorry sis,” Joe spoke and moved Gin out of the way, opening the door more for Yuzu. 

She thanked him quietly, moving to walk into the threshold of the apartment and being met with a few familiar faces, and a few unfamiliar. Yuzu bit at her lip.

“For those of you who don't know, this is my sister Yuzu. Yuzu, meet Reko, Nao, Qtaro, Kai, Gin, Kanna, and Mishima,” Joe rambled, pointing at everyone respectively as he introduced them. Gin was looking up at Yuzu, his eyebrows crinkled in confusion.

“Joe-Joe, your sister is very short, meow! Must be a family thing, woof!”

Yuzu giggled while Joe moved to nuzzle Gin’s head, causing the kid to groan in distaste as his hair was messed up. She continued to giggle quietly, her hand gripping at the strap of her purse. She still felt out of place, even with the calm atmosphere that surrounded her. 

“C’mon,” Keiji hummed out, patting a spot beside him on the couch. Yuzu blinked, glancing over at him and feeling her face begin to heat up. She obliged, however, moving to sit down beside Keiji and placing her purse down at her feet. The group talked amongst each other, which Yuzu began to drone out as she looked at a small, obviously fake plant on the coffee table in front of her. Gin began to inch closer to the girl, sitting in front of her criss crossed and his green eyes looking up. 

“Meow, are you Keiji’s girlfriend?” He asked, Yuzu’s eyes widening. Keiji coughed harshly, choking a bit on the water he had in his mouth as Gin’s eyebrow perked up.

“No, no! I mean, haha.. Uh… I met him today actually, at my flower shop…” Yuzu replied, and Gin’s eyebrow was still raised in suspicion. Yuzu’s back felt rigid, sitting up straight as she adverted her gaze from the small boy in front of her. “Why is your face red then, woof?”

Yuzu chuckled hesitantly, moving to fiddle with her fingers as she felt a hand placed on the small of her back. She kept her face from making any expression, but the heat lingered. She glanced, realizing Keiji had put his hand there, and her mind started to go a million miles an hour.

Why are his hands so big? Why is he so big? How is he this nice? Is he trying to comfort me? Kids ask stupid shit all the time! Shouldn’t be a big deal, right? 

“Calm down,” Keiji whispered, Gin’s attention span already receding as he moved to go towards Joe and Sara, sitting down in the red haired girl’s lap and practically stretching out like a cat. Yuzu moved to look at Keiji, who had a smug grin on his face, causing her to slap his shoulder.

“You thought that was funny, huh? Jerk,” she mumbled, his fingers now moving gently against her back.

“You’re just so darn cute.”

Yuzu rolled her eyes, moving her hands to her cheeks to cover up the obvious blush that had made its way to her skin. Keiji chuckled, leaning back into the couch once more and his hand leaving the small of her back. Was it weird that she wanted it to stay? She was a mess, for a man she had just met, and it was not something she was used to. Feelings weren’t something she was used to.

Keiji admired how he could make Yuzu feel, validating his own feelings in the process. This girl was someone that he wanted to make his, no doubt about it. There was no anxiety in the thought either, just the want for the woman that sat so close to him on the couch. Watching as her delicate hands played with each other, how her face scrunched up in a laugh as she listened to jokes from others in the group. It made his heart swell in a way he hadn’t felt in a while, and if he didn’t believe in love at first sight, he would be damned to ignore the obvious signs that this was.

Q-Taro was currently ranting about something that happened in a baseball match of his, his southern accent booming in the tiny space of Keiji’s apartment while everyone laughed and snickered at his theatrics. Keiji watched as Yuzu began to feel comfortable, glancing as she leaned back on the couch and scooted closer to Keiji involuntarily. His hand went to cover the lower half of his face, elbow on the arm rest of the couch as his gaze adverted. So small. So cute. 

Yuzu’s hands were now on her lap, not picking at her skin as she usually did when she was in an unfamiliar environment. Her shoes were kicked off, knees pulled up to her chest as another giggle left her at Q-Taro getting told off by Kai for being too egotistical about a game of baseball. She felt content, even with not having known anyone, she felt at home. At ease, more or less.

The night soon drew to a close, Joe and Shin calling it a night before anyone else did due to the fact Kanna ended up passing out with her head on Kai’s lap. Gin let out a big yawn, which signalled Sara that it was about time for them to leave as well. Yuzu’s eyes felt a bit droopy, and she moved to get up about 15 minutes after the other 5 had left.

“Thank you for inviting me over, Keiji, truly. I enjoyed meeting your friends, and seeing Joe,” she hummed, tiredness lingering in her voice. Keiji glanced up at her, a small smile on his face as he watched Yuzu rub her sleepy eyes. “No worries, Yuzu. They seemed to like you a lot, sunshine.”

Yuzu’s face grew a bit red at the throw of the nickname again, and Keiji wondered if that was how she reacted to the text message. She yawned herself, saying goodbye to the other two who were now sitting on the floor across from the couch, Q-Taro and Kai already out the door. Reko and Nao said their goodbyes, telling her not to be a stranger, and with that, Yuzu made her way home.

“Keeeeeijiiiii,” Nao’s voice rang teasingly, and Keiji’s eyes went to the girl with pink fluffy hair. 

“What’s up?”

“You liiiike her,” she teased again, and Keiji rolled his eyes. There it was. That anxious feeling that he knew would come and bite him in the ass. He felt his ears become hot, eyes now adverting the gaze of the two who were being relentless about his crush on the girl who walked in. His own personal sunflower.

“Keij, ya gotta let yourself loosen up a little. It was nice to see you that open with someone new again,” Reko patted his knee respectfully, moving to get up and helping Nao up right afterwards. Keiji sighed out.

“It’s just… I am not the type of person she should have to deal with,” Keiji groaned, moving to run a hand through his hair. Reko let out a ‘pfft’, Nao’s face in a pout as she watched her friend start to talk down to himself.

“You’re a great guy, Keiji! We all have our own traumas, genuinely, but don’t be afraid of that! As your therapist said, you have to do things out of your comfort zone. And even then, she seems to make you feel comfortable,” Nao rambled.

“And she is really fuckin’ cute,” Reko piped up. Keiji’s eyes widened at that, and Nao let out a giggle. “Just don’t let those demons stop you from being happy, Keij. You deserve it more than anyone.” 

And with that, they were both making their way out of the house. Keiji started to recede back more into the couch, letting out a sigh as his fingers went to unbutton the top two buttons of his shirt. Hand running through his hair again, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and clicked on Yuzu’s contact.

‘You, me… dinner on Saturday, Sunshine?’ 

[izupie]

🏖 and 🖤 pretty please uwu

Thanks for the questions from this writing ask game ♡♡♡

🏖 something funny from one of your WIPs....

Ohhhh there's a really good bit from my secret project that I chuckled at the whole time I wrote it! But alas, it shall remain a secret until the time comes to post it, not even a snippet allowed!

My sense of humour is so weird so I often find myself laughing at stupid stuff I write tbh... Even a good pun is enough to set me off while I type lmao

There's this....

It’s not like Ochako wasn’t going to bring up the fact that she’d been Deku The Rabbit… at some point… but she’d been hoping it would be a funny moment that they could both laugh about. She’d have said something like, ‘got ya!’ and he’d have said something like, ‘you sure got me back you silly rabbit!’.

Or, well… maybe not quite like that.

She could be excused for her imaginary Izuku not sounding quite right while her brain was giving her nothing but deafening static again.

-----------------

🖤 favourite book/author....

I don't read a whole lot of 'real' books these days *sweats* but! I do have a favourite book series!

The His Dark Materials books are such a comfort read. I adore them and I can read them over and over and over.

My favourite of the three is probably The Subtle Knife because I love the imagery of the liminal space feeling empty world and I enjoy the dynamic between Lyra and Will.

But Northern Lights is an absolute banger too of course. Introduction to the whole world and concept done really well.

The Amber Spyglass kind of went of the rails a bit for me and got extra weird from the other two - sometimes I feel like it was written by a different author its just so.... strange. But if I turn my brain off I can still have a good time with it. And the ending will always hurt me in a way that reminds me of a good hurt/comfort fanfic.

[frankenuff]

naclyoho Day 1

I’d completely forgotten about naclyoho until I started to see posts crossing my dash yesterday. I didn’t feel up to it last year, which was frankly a whole clusterfuck. This year? Well, we’ll see how it goes.

No podcasts to carry me through the tasks and give me a sense of time, but yesterday I adulted before I remembered about the salty pirates and damn it I’m going to claim it:

Started to clear out the built-in wardrobe in the guest room - eventually the plan is to remove the doors entirely and get a (to be determined) number of hanging organisers to go on the rail. The idea is to have a place to put clothes that isn’t The Heap, and where they’re easily visible and easy to put away. I have two sub-heaps right now, one of stuff still in good condition but outgrown (sideways, alas) to donate, one of stuff that might still fit and which I may want to keep.  The rest of the stuff in there is Partner’s and needs him to check what if anything he wants to keep.

Sorted out getting a refund for something that was accidentally overcharged

Contacted the old pension company and got my contact details updated (phone call; despite working in effectively a call centre I HATE making phone calls)

Arranged (another damned phone call, the online booking whatsit shows no available bookings for the rest of this month and a chunk of next so I think it’s broken) for a plumber to visit to repair a leaking pipe (he came today, looked at the pipe, told us it needs a part ordered and went away again. hopefully it won’t be too long before the part arrives and he can come back and stop the dripping)

Actually put away a bunch of stuff before it could be absorbed by The Heap, aided by the fact that I’ve worked out how to have said stuff visible and accessible in the place I’m most likely to need it. This was the first mostly-emptied-it-now-reload-it post-laundry stage, hopefully I’ll continue to find it convenient enough to be worth the mild mucking about folding things, and will keep doing it.

Irritatingly, none of these things were either particularly difficult or time-consuming, which is bloody typical for my crappy brain. Held together almost entirely by maladaptive coping mechanisms, bloody-mindedness, and spite, that thing.

[libidomechanica]

This slight: who ever

To mournful, sober-suited Night!     One day by day to climb. Man describe but we will to endure,     and trust things harms and

boats and married lady, and were     injured. Cheeks of living Water drain’d whereon thee Diggon,     what he stal, is nowe sithence

comes o’er my life, alas, poor     silly brained, that underfoot, the chameleons, spitality.     That should helpe reject,

ye know holy strife. Be wise as     this Parable—wretch as wine; nor Liberal, since in us     is overrules tread, at

night, on all; will last Duchess’ cheek     and her shall a Xerox of soft nervelets were alive.     Just as eager or seas

morn, to sullen surges and mark     in thy head I writhing one another’s arms, here’s a     feast and thou art made us

brave behind, for shade with science-     fiction, humming to empty court huntsmen that dark herself     thus youth, and delves and

keep, Why will be liberty began     to set in all; the bride with blazing light rising ivory     skin like it. He asked,

she smile? Like trees, the sulfuric     air, the wealth or more with the better all the worlds have light     ascension, Heaven; a

new rhythm. Waits the fangs shall I     live, drained, that make of sorrow pine, by his rest. Those stern nymph     beguile keep her mind an

entomologist in the worse     the shall I cannot be— who breathes. Bearing with howling over     dwell, lilies grown, lawless

that the countenance behold,     upon his captive nymphs pursuit? For ever love, I compared     to scorn. The time intent

run into a firmament     glistered Hero ere I do cry. Elephants. Or troubled     hands, but breathed life through

and went sill six stories are learned     askance aside thee, mournful twilight again undone,     possess on her quiver’d

with, she you that shin’st, as the end     of green, and strong influence like suppose we join hands, and     delves and hides the good turned

since these love at all, while and gainer     too. Stiles where or my decay, that shooten neerest thence     wit so poor for him. This

slight: who ever new; thy looked so     down thine eyes, lips the shepecote, and alone. The influence     breast motion some did

under eyelids, as women standing     to they keep her mother, brother laddie frae her the mount     up a blinding pool of

air or please let it be not won     until finally, inevitably     Not to bed, about come.

[okamirayne]

hey rayne, do you have a BtB playlist??? I don't know if this is all in my head but I was listening to Iris from The Goo Goo Dolls and I remembered Btb and I thought about several other songs that remind me of btb

Hey there, my lovely!

Oh my dear, I used to have my BtB playlists...up until my sweet, loyal, Classic iPod decided to BE AN ABSOLUTE DEMON-WHORESON AND WIPE ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING OFF THE FACE OF ITS TINY TRAITOROUS ELECTRONIC BRAIN....

.....sorry about that. I think I get triggered every time I see my dearly departed little Apple Classic winking at me from my drawer...god damned mutinying little shit...and the mockery of it...it's not like it even died...I could take that...if it just stopped working, gave up its little electronic Casper and went down with some respect -- spent, done, overworked and terminal...

But no.

It STILL WORKS. IT'S JUST EMPTY. LIKE SOME PEOPLE I KNOW.

SORRY.

You'd have thought I'd have the original FULL playlists saved on my main computer, wouldn't you? Alas. No

....Why?

I'll tell you...

That said, I think I have a DeviantArt journal entry somewhere with playlists. I'd have to dig it up. I am pretty sure I could compile a list again as I listen to my new playlists (which now reside on my new little SONY because I'm bitter device). Ah! Iris is a great number. I could try to list off a few for you from memory if you were particularly interested, luv.

Thanks for the question, Anon, and I'm sorry I couldn't copy and paste a list for you...I have since learned my bloody lesson!

[paimon-rambles]

You breakdown in front of him

Characters; Xiao, Childe, Kaeya

Notes: I did these slighty different from how I normally do my hcs. These kinda got long (´ヘ｀()

It was interesting to experiment around with it and I'm kinda proud with how it turned out :)

Theres a blurb at the end of each one~!

-

- Xiao

You were missing him dearly

You were aware that Xiao would be leaving the inn for a while to deal with some Adepti duties. Before he left, he made you a promise that he'll return soon. What you weren't aware of was that soon wasn't going to be that soon

Weeks and a few more passed and you found yourself exploring the inn all by yourself, going to sleep by yourself and waking up to no one. It felt utterly lonely. Not to mention the stress that continued to build up within your system with worry for your boyfriend 

Thankfully Verr was there to keep you reassured that Xiao was alright which eased you a bit but didn't fill that empty void. It was until one day you learned that he was returning the very next day-! You swore you were going to cry at that very moment, but alas you kept yourself composed and thanked Verr for the information.

The day came to a close and tomorrow became today. When you awoke, you kinda forgot about Xiao returning on that very day due to your sleepy state. 

But you weren't ready for the surprise that would reveal itself the moment you opened your tired eyes. 

There he was, standing in your room as he had just entered. His attention was fixed on something else, not noticing you had just woken. In the seconds that followed your drowsiness was gone in a snap and you were engulfed by crushing emotions at once. All the stress that had taken refuge within your troubled mind released 

" Xiao!"

The call of his name caught the Adeptus off guard, bringing his attention back to the formerly sleeping figure. What he did not expect to see, however, was to see his lovers gaze distort into a sob as a choked cry left their lips

Before you could stop yourself, crystal-like tears poured from your eyes, dripping down your cheeks like rain before planting onto your shirt or blanket. You couldn't stop it, more uncontrollably sobs escaped you and soon the room was echoing in your cries

In an instant, he was rendered confused and panicked simultaneously. He doesn't know what to do either, personal comfort wasn't one of his specialties 

" Y/n, why are you crying? You can tell me"

He nudges his face closer to you in a feeble attempt to calm you down. In his head, he's already speculating that you were hurt or someone hurt you. In which case he's ready to beat them up

" Did someone hurt you? What's bothering you?"

But those thoughts quickly disappear as you wrap your arms around him. Your face was pressed against his chest, you were growing increasingly shaky. A muttered sentence escaped your lips that caused the Adepti to feel an odd clenching feeling in his chest

" I- I just really miss you, Xiao! You were gone for so long, I got so worried. I'm sorry" 

Why are you apologizing? Is the first thought that runs through his mind. On the outside, he's kinda just standing there as you sob but on the inside, it's a wild goose run. He's in a panic. 

Xiao dislikes seeing you unhappy let alone crying, his favorite aspect of you is when you're happy. Such as your face. He loves seeing your features when you're happy. Your smile, eyes, and how they crinkle when you laugh. Seeing that aspect of you be morphed into a teary gaze causes his heart to drop. He tries all he can think of to make you feel better

Suddenly you feel a pair of firm arms embrace you. 

" I'm here now. I won't leave you. I'll always be at your side through everything. Nothing can tear me away from you"

His hand is trying to comfort you by running his fingers through your h/c curls. A soothing little gesture he wishes could help make you feel better. His lips find their way to kiss you on the crown of your head.

Slowly your tears come to a stop, your face snuggling closer to him. His little attempts at soothing had done its magic. You felt your eyes closed as waves of exhaustion started to hit you again. Before you went unconscious you mumbled; 

"Thank you"

Xiao starts to have a warm feeling pulsing in his chest, as you clung to him like a koala with the words you said previously ringing in his head. It was a curious feeling. 

As he rested you down on the bed, placing the blanket over your form,  he leaned over to press his lips to your head.

 After you awake from your second slumber, Xiao is sure to stick by your side for the remainder of the day and the one following it

The next time you have a breakdown, he's sticking by your side no matter what. He helps dry your tears off and assures you that everything is going to be okay. He spends the rest of the time distracting you from it. Reminding you that you're strong and you will get through it.

" You're strong y/n, I know you'll get through this and I'll be there with you every step."

He promised to stick by your side through it all and he's not breaking it.

 Xiao stumbled backward as your figure latched to him. He was rendered confused, as he struggled to comprehend the last few minutes that passed. He had just returned from a hefty mission and was greeted by the sight of his lover sobbing as their eyes landed on him.

 Your arms were wrapped around him tightly as if you were afraid something was going to take him away again. 

Hot uncontrollably tears continue to pour from your face, your features already puffing up from it, but that was the least of your concerns. Your focus at hand was your boyfriend. How long has it been since you last saw him? You lost count. But here he was now.

Words spilled out of your lips sheepishly,  shakey forms of letters connecting to create a skewered sentence. 

" I miss you so much, Xiao." The words choked out and your throat hitch as breathing became a struggle. 

A pair of arms went to cradle you, it caught you off guard as you gasped. You felt a forehead lean against yours. The simple act almost spurred on more tears, he was really there.

"  I'm here now, I won't leave you. I'll always be at your side through everything. Nothing can tear me away from you." He pressed a kiss to your forehead sealing his promise to you.

- Childe

It was an argument

You finish early with your commissions and head home to start dinner for you and your boyfriend. He told he had a lot of busy work today before he kissed you goodbye and so thought it be a nice surprise for your boyfriend to come to some dinner

The clock ticked down as night approached by the hour. You quickly finished cooking the meal and placed it at the table. The familiar sound of the door opening met your ears and you quickly went to greet your boyfriend 

You were expecting to see your boyfriend's signature smile as he greets you. But- what you weren't ready for were the sharp eyes and irritated gaze pasted to his face. You swore his eye twitched the moment you came into his view. It was as if he was upset with you

No doubt about it, it was a long, tiring, and frustrating day at work. 

You tried to greet him but you could tell he was a ticking time bomb, at any moment he would snap. You decided to keep quiet, minus the minor greetings and lay out his dinner for him. Childe said nothing in turn.

You went to grab a glass to pour him some water, but just as you went to grab the cup, your ankle gave in causing you to lose your footing momentarily. You didn't fall thankfully and got back on your feet. The same can't be said for the glass cup, it collided with the ground smashing in pieces. 

That was enough to tick him off

He snapped out. Scolding you for being careless and for making a mess he'll have to clean up adding to the pile of work he already needs to stress about. He didn't hide his sharp words, each one puckered into your brain

Your feet were frozen in place. Your legs become wobbly as the room grew fuzzy. You could feel your chest growing tight as you struggled to take breaths of oxygen. 

Then the tears

Childe instantly stopped the moment he saw the tears. he knew immediately that he went too far and he shouldn't have even snapped in the first place

Burning tears were falling down your face, splashing to the floor

And the guilt came crashing down on the Fatui Harbinger like Zhongli just dropped a boulder on him

" Y/n- I'm sorry I shouldn't have yelled. Please don't cry."

He would hesitate whether he should approach you or not. He wants nothing more than to pull you into a hug and apologize repeatedly 

More tears were running down your cheeks, your hands crept up in a feeble attempt to cover your face from him. 

" I'm sorry" you choked out full heartily believing this was your fault. 

" Y/n, it's not your fault. Love, please look at me, I didn't mean what I said- I promise. Please stop crying."

Those words were successful at soothing your sobs but they didn't stop your shaky legs from wobbling so much. You felt yourself losing your footing once more and you fell to your knees

In an instant Childe was by your side, his arms going to hold you cup your cheeks, using his thumb to wipe the tears off your face. Almost by instinct, your arms went to hug him, you pressed your head against his chest your breathing  becoming heavy in an attempt to stop your aggressive sniffling 

Childe whispered sweet nothings in your ear, his hand rubbing circles on your back. His lips are glued to your forehead. He has so much guilt and internally he's scolding himself. 

His heart clenches whenever he hears your sniffle

" Everything is going to be okay, I promise you. I'll clean up the mess, don't worry about it, love."

After more of his sweet nothings,  your sniffles die away, and you're left with in a tired and exhausted state

Childe helps clean up your face, his touches incredibly gentle as if you were made out of porcelain; softly caressing your cheeks while wiping the rest of your tears away with care 

He carries you to your shared bedroom where he lays you down and allows you to get your rest. In the meanwhile, he's going to be punching himself all over, regretting his actions. Your scared expression is burned in his brain and he grimaces as he remembers how he acted. He swears to himself to never act out like that again

The following day you'll wake up to your boyfriend pampering you beyond no end. He takes you to fancy dinner, on a nice stroll. He pulls out all the cards hoping you'll forgive him

Whenever you have a breakdown Childe is there to spice up your day. He promises you that everything will be alright and that things will get better. Followed by many kisses and hugs that help soothe you back to your happy self

" Everything will be okay in the end, just you wait. I'm always here to help you every step of the way. Now please stop crying love, it hides your beautiful smile."

He loves your smile, and he'll fight anyone who threatens to take that away. including himself

What even coaxed this argument in the first again? 

The question lingered in the Harbinger's head. He was mentally fighting himself over it. So much guilt swirled within him as he replayed the scene that unfolded moments before. It was a simple mistake on your part, but the way Childe acted, he doubts he'll ever forgive himself for it.

 He held onto the shaking feeble body of his lover. Their head was towards the ground, hiding their face from Childe but he could already envision your scared expression; tears rolling down your puffy face as you struggled to take a single intake of breath. Your throat was throbbing from sobbing uncontrollably and the sniffles and hiccups that followed after. 

The ginger gently cupped your cheek, bringing your face towards him. His heart dropped seeing your glossy e/c eyes. " Love, please look at me, I didn't mean what I said, I promise. Please stop crying." His finger cradled your tears, wiping your face slowly whilst his other hand drew shapes on your back. 

You leaned closer to his hand, the little gestures soothing you quite a bit. A few more tears and hiccups escaped from you, the last of your crying coming to an end. Childe felt his chest clench as the corners of your lips curled slightly.

" Let's get you cleaned up."

- Kaeya

You had a nightmare

It was getting late and you had just finished eating dinner. Your day was filled with commissions that easily left you exhausted. All you want to do now is to collapse into your bed and rest. 

Your boyfriend was caught up with some commissions, promising to be home soon. Usually, you'd wait until your boyfriend comes home, but your eyes were dropping uncontrollably. And you swore if you didn't do something soon you'll pass out right there.  

And so you left some extra dinner in case Kaeya came home hungry and you set off to prepare for bed. 

The moment your head hits the pillow it lights out. 

It felt like hours had passed, your brain was fuzzy and unable to comprehend what was happening. You were shifting in your sleep, your face morphing into one of discomfort. It was clear you were in distress. 

Suddenly, you jolted awake. Your breathing was heavy as panting, you could feel your heart racing against your chest. Sweat was rolling down your forehead, and you felt your chest tighten with each passing second. No doubt you were having a nightmare. A very livid one at that

You hadn't even realized that tears rolled down your face until you went to rub your eyes. You were crying. As more seconds passed more of your panic started to rise.

A choked sob left your lips as you struggled to keep quiet, your boyfriend was still asleep beside you. 

 In an attempt to not wake Kaeya, you went to leave to another room where you could sob to yourself but as you went to get up you felt something grab your shoulder. 

" Y/n, are you alright? Why are you crying, love?" Kaeya's tired voice muttered.

 Internally you scolded yourself for waking him. 

" Uh, I just need some fresh air." You semi lied

Kaeya saw right through that, and in an instant, he pulled you into a hug, and suddenly you found yourself sobbing into his shoulder. Uncontrollably tears pouring from your face, dripping down and soaking his nightshirt. 

In an instant, Kaeya was trying to soothe you. A comforting hand was drawing shapes on your back, whilst the other was running through your hair very gently

" It's alright, cry it out. Everything will be okay." He whispered into your ear.

More sweet nothings followed, slowly calming you down again. Less and fewer tears fell from your glossy eyes and drowned into sniffling as the last of your crying came to an end

You snuggled closer to his chest, listening to his heardrowneas it lulled you to a calmer state. Soon you were returning to your natural self, your shakiness ceasing.

" I promise everything is going to be alright. I'm right here love, I'm not going anywhere."

You stayed like that for a while until eventually, you fell asleep in his arms. You didn't have any more nightmares 

In the morning he's gonna be very affectionate and cuddly,  lots of butterfly kisses, and hugs. They're coming and you can't stop them

Whenever you have a breakdown, Kaeya is quick to act, he doesn't tease instead he reassures you that everything is going to be alright. (internally he's in a panic, unsure what to do when his partner is crying) He makes sure you take breaks throughout the day and enough rest. 

" It's okay to take breaks y/n. You're strong, you'll get through, I just know it."

Another boy who loves your smile, please smile for him

Sobs and sniffles escaped your lips becoming muffled by the fabric of Kaeya's shirt. Tears dripped down your puffy and red flushed face, rolling down and staining both his and your own nightclothes.

It was a nightmare that caused this. It was still fresh in your mind, every little detail prominent and defined. You squeezed your eyes shut, snuggling your face closer to his chest trying to shut it out. In an instant Kaeya arms tighten around you in an embrace. 

His lips rested near your ear, sweet nothings rolling off his tongue with each sob you cried. It was comforting. His voice slowly pulled you into a calm state and with each word of affection, the less you cried.

" It's alright, cry it out. Everything will be okay." He whispered. His hand continued to draw shapes and lines on your back, his other gently cradling your head against his shoulder. 

Your shakey form slowly ceased and the sound of your sniffles died away until it was just your breathing that was heard. 

A sweep of drowsiness washed over you, your eyes growing heavy. 

Kaeya laid you down and placed the blanket over your form before leaning to press a chaste kiss to your forehead.

" Good night <3"

[cheekygreenty]

A Little Death - The Darkling x Reader

Enemies-to-lovers, one bed trope AND smut. You’re welcome 🖤

The mission went terribly, just as you said it would. You were always known to voice your concerns during meetings and this one was no different but he hadn't bothered to take your criticism into account.

The big bad Darkling couldn't stand you for that very reason or so he told himself. You were loud, outspoken, rude, and a control freak. You clashed and fought but he kept you there for perspective reasons, even though he never listened to you, like ever.

You laughed when the mission turned sour, earning yourself a glare from everybody, including him. If it wasn't the hours of sleep you lost to carry out the stupid mission in the first place, you would be heading toward Os Alta by now, but no. Everyone was tired and hungry and practically begging for a proper bed and not a makeshift cot in a tent, you included.

Vacancy was lit, the guests were checking in

You waited as the colorful keftas dispersed into the inn and as you approached the innkeeper to grab your keys, he hesitated.

'Only one room left.' He looked afraid to say it, does he think I need more than one? The confused look on your face kept until you saw General Kirigan appear out of the corner of your eye, looking right at you with a displeased look.

'Will it fit two people?'

'Yes Sir'

'Alright then, Y/L/N you're with me.' He took the keys and gestured for you to walk through the archway but you couldn't believe your ears. This man was the General of the Second-Army, almost as rich as the King but he had to share a room, with me no less?! Of all the bloody people on this journey, it obviously has to be me.

You bit back the rude remark that sat at the tip of your tongue and gave a curt nod. It's just one night and I'm ready to pass out.

'After you General' You forced a smile and watched as his irritation grew. Although you hated the man, you had to admit he was incredibly handsome, you weren’t blind. His dark onyx eyes always stood out against the pale of his skin, and the perfectly quiffed jet-black hair practically begged to have your fingers running through it.

His cape whirled around him as he walked past you, breaking you out of your trance. You guessed he knew where he was going as he ascended the wooden stairs and climbed to the top. Out of boredom, you counted the room numbers you passed not paying attention to him and stopped when you walked right into his rock-solid back. 'Saints- I'm sorry.' You blundered. I think that's the first time I've ever said sorry to him. He ignored you and walked into the room, inspecting it closely. You did too, but were cut short when you noticed the absence of another bed.

The room was fit for two

'There's only one bed' You dead-panned. You thought for a moment, looking around for a couch, an armchair, anything, but came up empty-handed. 'This is just great.' You sighed and looked to him. He had shed his heavy cape and donned his black kefta, staring at the one bed the same way you did.

'Well? What are we going to do?' You threw your hands up in exasperation 'Perhaps they have a tub I can-'

'Don't be ridiculous Y/N.' Y/N? I think that's the first time he's called me by my name.

'I meant to go wash, General. It's been a long week.' As opposed to some of the others, including the General, you had stayed in a tent over the past 2 days to gather intel. He and his flock stayed in inns and hotels, bathing in luxury and warmth.

'Yes, of course.' He stared into your eyes, holding your gaze for a hot minute before you looked away, suddenly feeling shy.

You put the bed situation at the back of your mind as you fetched some warm water and washed the grime of failed missions off. So much wasted time, all because nobody would listen to you, he wouldn't listen to me. If he weren't so gorgeous, I would kill him in his sleep.

Once you felt clean enough and your hair began to dry, you walked out of the washroom, enveloped by a towel as you searched your pack for anything you could sleep in. Perhaps the bath fogged up your mind, for you completely forgot the General was sharing the small space with you.

'You know you talk to yourself?' His voice scared the living daylights out of you. He was sitting back lazily against the headboard of the bed in his shirt and breeches smirking to himself. 'I think conspiring my death is reason enough for prison, is it not?' You couldn't tell if he was joking.

'I never said I would.' You bit back, grasp tightening around the flimsy towel.

'Because I'm too gorgeous?' He stood up from the bed and walked over to you. You never registered how much taller he was than you as his eyes scanned you up and down, like a predator hunting its prey.

'I need to get dressed, General'

'Hmmm, yes I can tell.' He took a bit of hair that hung in front of your face and held it between his fingers, the action sending waves of arousal through you, What- No. He was dangerously close, you could feel his breath tickle your ear and he was bound to hear your pounding heartbeat. But alas he moved away, sashaying into the washroom leaving you alone. I need a cold bath.

***

You were dressed for bed now, curled up on the left side of the bed. You were trying to sleep, really trying, but knowing he was laying right next to you only heightened your insomnia.

You knew he was awake too and he did little to hide it amongst the deafening silence of the room. You could feel the heat coming from his body, radiating an invitation for you to join him. You huffed loudly and turned again for the umpteenth time that hour, attempting to escape the weird tension in the room.

'Can't sleep?'

'Obviously.' Even in the dark, you knew he was smirking.

'I know something that would help.' Suddenly he was on top of you, caging you in with a hand at the sides of your head. You could feel the bare skin of his arm and chest as he slightly pressed down onto you, signaling that he wasn't wearing the black silk shirt anymore. Wherever his skin brushed against yours, it ignited that longing and need in you and it felt addictive.

I want you to touch me

'What are you doing? I thought you hate me.' Your proximity allowed for you to see the slight glistening of his eyes. They had an edge to them, a darkness you'd never seen before or never paid attention to.

'You're one to speak.' Taking one hand from beside your head, he so very slowly traced the side of your face, and your breath caught in your throat as he continued his way down your neck and further, stopping at your thigh where your nightgown had bunched up. 'I think it's time we stop this charade of ours.' As you concentrated on the feel of his fingers against your burning skin, he moved his head into the crook of your neck, his breath hot and exhilarating as he spoke.

'What charade' Your words came out with a deep exhale in anticipation of his actions.

'The one where we both pretend we don't want to fuck each other's brains out.'

Your eyes flew open at his crude remark but shut right back again as his lips gently kissed your collarbone and made their way up to your jaw, getting increasingly rough as he traveled. His hand at your thigh sneaked its way under the gown and now gripped your bare hip in a tight hold. 'What do you say?' His lips were now at yours, touching them as he spoke. All your logic flew out the window of the dingy inn. You didn't care that this was your General, or that he could kill you in an instant, all that mattered was that you needed him, and he wanted you.

'Ye-'

Before you even finished, his lips were hot on yours, devouring you in a bruising kiss. He pressed into you harder and if you had any reservations about his feeling towards you, they were flushed away as he made his arousal for you obvious. It fueled you, awoke your need to control with a jolt.

You fought for dominance, letting your mouth duel for any scrap of authority you could have over the man, but he kept you wrapped around his finger, tightening his grasp on you while simultaneously letting your mind run free with thoughts of him and only him. He was dangerous; intimidating.

She sought death on a queen-sized bed.

He began to pull away but to your surprise he only hauled you up with him, taking your thighs and forcing you into a straddle around his lap, not once letting his lips leave your body.

'You do it on purpose, don't you? Vexing and riling me up in front of others-' He took hold of the nightgown and pulled it up over your head before roughly grabbing your chin and letting his lips brush against your now swollen ones '-I swore to myself if you did it again, I would've thought you a lesson right before their very eyes.'

The General was quick to pull you back into him, bare chests pressed together and heartbeats merging into one. Your hips moved on their own accord, slowly drawing circles around his bulge.

'General I didn't take you for a man that stalled.' You spoke against his lips. You were done with his words, you needed his actions.

I want you to touch me there

Make me feel like I am breathing

At that, his hand let go of its deathly grip on your waist and quickly went to your core. Letting a deep growl out at your dripping wetness, he plunged a finger deep into you as his palm stroked your clit at an excruciatingly painful pace, too slow for your liking. You couldn't help keep the whimper down and he had the audacity to chuckle at your neediness.

'And I didn't take you to be so impatient.' He nipped at your shoulder as he picked up his pace, earning a series of moans from you. It was like music to his ears.

With your head against his chest, you rode your wave of pleasure out with his fingers still inside you, milking your first orgasm of the night.

Almost immediately he had you under him again and before you could register with your eyes, you felt the head of his cock nudging at your sensitive bud, as if begging for entry. It sent shivers up your spine, seeing him there at your mercy. He ran across your wet folds again and a throaty moan echoed around the room. Are you sure he's at your mercy?

You coaxed him to enter and once he did you felt euphoria. He stretched you out to your limits, filled you until you bottomed out. His eyes were tightly shut as he basked in the comfort of you. It felt just as good to be buried in you as it did to kiss you. You enveloped his senses and his mind. You were the only thing that mattered to him at that very moment.

'Saints Y/N.' His forehead fell against yours as he thrust in and out of you, bearing his weight on the arm not holding your thigh up.

Despite the pleasure clouding your mind and vision, you managed to grab at his vulnerability and flip you both around. He didn't fight back, only grabbed hold of the back of your neck to kiss you deeply as you pounded down onto him. His hold on your hip was deadly, bound to bruise. He liked the thought of marking you as his.

You came with a strangled cry, the pulsing around his length sending him into a frenzy of his own as your name spilled out like a prayer from his lips. It took a while for you to catch your breath and return to your natural state. But it didn't last long before the events of the night were repeated and more marks were littered across your body.

It was only then that you fell asleep, thoroughly spent and exhausted, awaiting the next time you could defy him.

_______

Taglist (Tell me if you want to be added!!)

@aleksanderwh0r3 @theonelittleone @searching-for-gallifrey @lostysworld @0-artemis @exo-1204 @staradorned @bookfrog242 @simp-for-ben-barners @keepdaydreamingbb @acciorudolphx @pansysgirlfriend @pansysgirlfriend @justmesadgirl

[manjiroro]

can i request a continuation of the last one-shot (sanzu cheating one) where the reader moves on or gets even or something 😭 it would put my soul to ease

love of my life

character: sanzu

content: angst, male reader, bonten sanzu, reader getting over sanzu

part 1

hello!! thank you for requesting~~ PLEASE- i'm sorry for the pain :,,) but i think i have replaced one pain with another IWJEJEJ IM SORRY I CANT HELP IT

i apologise for any mistakes and i hope you enjoy~~

Moving on from Sanzu Haruchiyo was hard considering that you felt that he was the one for you. Dreadful weeks soon turned to months and to be honest, the only thing on your mind was Sanzu Haruchiyo, the scene of that night constantly replaying in your mind.

At the start, you were blaming yourself, was it because you didn’t show him enough love? Was it because you weren’t good enough for him? You ended up spiralling down the rabbit hole, wrecking your brain for reasons as to why he did it. He said he loved you didn’t he? He said he wanted to marry you didn’t he? So why, why on earth would he do such a thing?

But thankfully, as time went on, you slowly healed. You realised your self worth, you realised that this wasn’t your fault. You were definitely there for him at his worst and you definitely showed him you care. This was his loss, he lost the person who loved him the most. The confidence once lost slowly, but surely got back to you.

You were starting to become a better person now, feeling as if everything had turned for the better. The sky never looked brighter, you were happy and you’ve finally let go.

Until that fateful day, you stumbled upon the familiar bubblegum pink haired male, at the same spot, at the same time. It’s been a few months since you last saw him and you couldn’t deny it, but he still did look as attractive as when you first saw him.

Anxiously, you tried hurrying away, trying to avoid him at all costs but alas, he spotted you.

“Y...n..?”

His voice sounded different, it wasn’t the same cocky tone that you were so familiar with. No, instead, it was softer, timid, as if he was afraid.

“Yes..?”

You asked as you turned around to face him. He really didn’t look any different, only difference was his change of aura. When you first met him, he gave off an intimidating yet intriguing aura, but now, it felt.. empty.

“Uhm, hey..”

He was at a lost for words, which was quite unusual for Bonten’s number two.

“Hi? Do you.. need something from me..?”

You were being cautious, not knowing what this devious man has up his sleeve. He might try to kill you for all you know.

“Look y/n.. I.. haven’t really moved on from us.. I’ve been thinking about it all the time and I realised how much of a dick I was back then.”

Honestly, you were shocked to hear the Sanzu Haruchiyo apologise. He wasn’t the type to do that, normally, he would’ve just let it go but it seemed like he was actually hurt from what had happened.

“Haru..”

Sanzu visibly perks up at the nickname that you used to call him. Oh, how he misses the way it rolls off your tongue.

“I’m glad that you realised how much of an ass you were being but.. I don’t think we should get together again.. I’ve already moved on.”

You confessed while looking at him in the eyes. Sanzu lets out a sigh before his lips turned into a small smile.

“Well, I guess that’s for the best then. I’m sorry y/n, I wasn’t a good boyfriend to you.”

“It’s alright Haru, I enjoyed our time together.”

You smiled back at him and he wishes time would just stop at this moment. The same smile that he loved, the same smile that never fails to brighten his day, that was the last time he’s ever going to see it.

You bowed at him before turning on your heel and walking away. You felt relieved to have gotten some closure from him and now, you can finally move on without any regrets. But, behind you stood Sanzu, staring at your disappearing figure. His heart clenched as he watches you slowly walk further away from him, oh how he wishes he could turn back time, to tell you how much he really loved you.

❥ masterlist

reblogs are highly appreciated!!

[lettrespromises]

#LettresPromises informs you : You have one notification.

──➤ Roronoa Zoro sent you a love letter to celebrate +400 followers, would you like to read it?

@newfriendjen sent a letter : ❝Hi Friend! Congrats again on your 400!! You definitely deserve many more! If you still have a spot open for you event (ignore if you filled them!), can I request: Smut Prompt #15 with Zoro 😏 please and thank you so much!❞ the author sent a letter : ❝dear jen, to say i got a bit carried while writing this is a bit of an understatement! but i hope you’ll like it as much as i liked writing it, all while cackling like a villain as i was writing this. thank you tons for the sweet words, you are such a sweetheart and i’m so lucky to know you! sending you lots of love! sealed with a kiss, nikki.❞

──➤ Prompt used : #15 “Look at what you’re doing to me.” ─➤ Genre : Smut. ➤ Warnings : MINORS DO NOT READ THIS, 18+ ONLY. Sexual intercourse, jealous sex, mild degradation, choking, biting, cunninlingus, penetration, spanking (once), sir kink.

The weather of the New World was often unforgiving, unpredictable, and at times, untamable. Sometimes, Mother Nature showed she was capable of crossing the limit of Nami’s extended knowledge regarding climate (and God knows her brain was severely infused with every secrets regarding the different kinds of weather, rendering her as a living, walking encyclopedia.) But alas, sometimes the rage of Mother Nature would be thrown upon any poor ship unready to face her wrath in the forms of undying tornados and waves that could reach the sky.

Hence why, every morning, Nami’s prediction on today’s weather was awaited by all, very much like a prophecy which was often set to come true— and if said prophecy announced any kind of weather gravitating around the lexical field of a natural catastrophe, one wouldn’t be surprised to perceive Usopp down on his knees in a praying position, diverse and unintelligible wishes to survive Mother Nature’s anger.

Much to the crew’s collective joy, the navigator had announced the most ideal weather— sunshine, a slight breeze and no cloud in sight, what appeared to be a regular weather in heaven. And, why of course, such a hot weather meant that both Nami and the local archeologist, Nico Robin, would bathe under the sun and relieve any kind of tension which had settled in after several fights (or just the exhaustion of having to deal with Luffy on a daily basis.)

And there you were, standing like a mannequin in the girls’ room in company of Nami and Robin, the latter throwing you an amused look at the way Nami was comparing which bikini would look better on you— the red one, an appeal for passion, or the black one, a statement of boldness? Her brows furrowed in unison at her poor attempt to make a decision, comparing how the colors married the shade of your skin.

« Robin, how are we feeling about the red bikini? It’s so cute, but I have a feeling something is missing… » The navigator wondered, her gaze falling on the taller woman next to her.

Robin couldn’t refrain from allowing a giggle from leaving her lips, surely it meant that she had her idea, an ill-intentioned one, that is. And, oh well, to say she had just a mere idea was an understatement : as she remained still, Robin summoned a couple of limbs to look for a green-colored bikini hidden in the drawers only to bring it to Nami’s attention. The two women shared a teasing glance, as if they communicated intentions filled with mischief through their eyes alone.

« I do believe something was missing, too. » Robin trailed off, bringing an index under her chin. « Something that might appeal to a certain swordsman. »

The evil cackle falling from Nami’s lips announced nothing good, and the sweet tone of her voice only deepened that sentiment. « You know how the saying goes : great minds think alike. »

« Hold on, what are you—… » You began, only to be cut off by the navigator, « Yeah, yeah, whatever you have to say, Y/N. We’re not fools, you know? You’re going to look like a real stunner with this bikini on, and I know that a certain someone won’t be able to resist. » She concluded her sentence with a wink sent your way, boy, sometimes you did understand why Zoro called her a witch at times.

« Join us when you’re ready, Y/N. I’m intrigued to see how this will go. » Concluded Robin, accompanying Nami towards the door to let you some privacy so you could change into the bikini, not that you have never changed in front of them and vice versa, but oh well.

You were now all alone, still haven’t moved an inch. Your thumb was brushing against the green fabric of the bikini over and over again until it had become some kind of obsession. But the more the motions continued, the more you realized that perhaps there was no other way to get out of this trap glamorously set by Robin and Nami. A sigh of despair left your lips, swearing to yourself that you’d have your payback sooner than later.

The door of the girls’ bedrooms slammed open, allowing your figure sculpted by the finest hands of the muses of beauty to be exposed to the kisses of the sun. The first sound to rip apart your thoughts was a squeal which left Nami’s mouth, the latter shaking Robin’s forearm with urgency to bring her attention onto you. « Robin, Robin! Look at her, isn’t she to die for? I’d bet all my money that Zoro is going to throw himself on her. I mean, just look at her! »

The same amused smile graced Robin’s facial traits, lowering her shades just a bit to have a good glance at how the oh so awaited green bikini embraced your body. « I must confess that it’s impossible to resist her. »

The words leaving her lips became clearer and clearer the more you approached them, a palette of rosy tones sitting proudly on top of your cheekbones at their compliments. « We saved you a seat, Miss I’m-too-sexy-for-my-own-good. Come with us! » Nami said, patting the empty spot next to her to which you wordlessly replied with a nod, sitting between her and Robin.

« You’re so evil, I kinda hate you for it. » A smile plastered upon your lips as the words died on your tongue.

« You love us and you know it. » Nami replied, letting her hand lingering on your forearm. « Ooh, would you look at that, Robin? The show is about to begin. » She concluded, taking a sip out of her cocktail with a gleam of mischief shining in her eyes.

And by show, the navigator undoubtedly meant the sudden appearance of the Sunny’s resident lover who had stormed out of the kitchen with a plate of different kinds of treats and cocktails for his ladies, spoiling them rotten on sunny days if it meant he could allow his eyes to linger a bit on your bodies in bikinis.

The first act of the show had begun in a flashy manner, as soon as Sanji closed the door leading to the kitchen behind him, the plate he was holding had fell onto the floor, a loud echo reasoning into the swordsman’s ears who was stuck in a deep state of slumber… Until now.

« I must have saved a country in my previous life to be worthy of such a privilege. » Sanji sobbed, falling onto his knees, « Y/N, you’re a goddess amongst us, we’re not worthy, I’m not worthy of your beauty. I will worship you everyday, I will cover you in love until my very last breath! » The cook continued, more and more praises falling from his lips in a continuous cascade as your cheeks were getting more and more red by the second. Alas, the more the blonde sang your praises, the more the swordsman was stirring awake— and if there was one thing Zoro hated with passion besides Sanji, it was waking up to loud noises.

Sanji had approached you, on one knee, the back of your hand pressed against his lips as the tears falling from his lips mixed with the blood leaking from his nose. « Thank you, my goddess, thank you for blessing my sore eyes. Words can’t describe how—… » And he went on and on again, his lips still traveling from the back of your hand to your forearm under Nami’s disgusted stare who yanked you away from him.

« My goddess—… »

« Oi! Do you ever shut up, stupid cook? » And despite the numerous occasions on which Zoro and Sanji have fought, Zoro’s words seemed intensely more acerbic, as sharp as the swords laying to his side, which even surprised Sanji.

« Were you talking to me, mosshead? » Sanji taunted.

« I don’t see anyone else here acting like a damn fool. » Zoro began, his sole eye conveying so much anger you could feel it. « Know your place. »

Nami elbowed Robin once more, the latter having long forgotten about the book sitting on her lap at this point. Sanji stepped towards the swordsman, dangerously reducing the space between the both of them until their foreheads were touching. There was no frown noticeable on Zoro’s face, but a blank expression which let through a pure anger. « She belongs to me, hands off what’s mine. » The swordsman spat, his shoulder hitting Sanji’s as he walked past him, leaving the cook in a stupor.

« Oi! You. » He said, pointing at your frame with his index. « Follow me. You and I are gonna’ have a word. »

He cursed himself for allowing his gaze to fall on your form, knowing damn well that with each second he spent looking at you in this green bikini (this damn color, he thought), the more he was falling under the spells casted by the muses of lust.

« Go get some! » Nami whispered, her tongue gracing her bottom lip.

« We expect all the details afterwards, my dear Y/N. » Robin giggled.

You had barely enough time to form any kind of response that you felt the foreign presence of Zoro’s digits snaking around your wrists and yanking you towards him. « Hey, I’m sure we can talk about this calmly, right? We can chat about it over a drink, I’ll ask Sanji to—… » Alas, your sentence never found its end, your mind going numb at the death glare Zoro sent your way as you mentioned Sanji’s name. But, paradoxically enough, it only fueled your arousal even more.

Zoro led you to the crow’s nest, trapping you and him both inside the same room. And as the silence grew heavier and heavier, until becoming asphyxiating, Zoro’s snicker broke the silence in the most mischievous way. A look of confusion was painted on your face, and you were quick to point at it. « W-What are you laughing at? »

« Do you think I’m fucking stupid? » Zoro half-asked.

You tilted your head to the side, slowly backing away until your back met the unforgiving surface of the wooden wall. « Answer me. » He demanded, one of his hand grabbing both of your wrists in one hold pinned above your head whilst his other hand cradled your jaw so you had no choice but devote your attention onto him.

« I don’t know what you’re talking about. » You pleaded, cheeks burning under the rosy tone as you felt his uneven breaths crashing against the column of your neck.

Wrong answer, Zoro shoved his knee between your already trembling legs. « You like the attention, hah? You love it when that pervert of a cook was throwing himself on you, is that it? Tch. » He was feeding his lust off of the scared expression on your face, blood rushing in the tightest space possible by the second.

« No answer, huh? ‘Guess I’m gonna have to teach you some manners, because it looks like you forgot who you belong to. » And with that, he dug his teeth into the skin of your neck, alternating between biting and sucking motions to form the most ravishing love bite— a symbol of belonging if you will. You squealed at the sudden sensation of his pearly whites inking his name into your skin, giving him exactly the reaction he was anticipating.

You rocked your hips against the thigh settled between your legs, a desperate attempt at getting some friction for your poor and aching core in need for attention. Zoro clicked his tongue once more at your antics, choosing to hush you by continuing the trail of hickeys adorning your martyr of a neck. « Care to explain what you’re doing? Throwing yourself on my thigh because you couldn’t get the shit cook, hah? You’re so fucking desperate, it makes me want to leave you there all alone. »

« Zoro! Please don’t, don’t leave me! I just need you, I don’t need anyone else but you! I promise I’ll be good but please, please, don’t leave me. » You pleaded, a clear veil of despair covering your eyes under his impassible expression.

The façade worn off soon, letting a smirk throne amongst his facial features instead. « Who do you belong to? » Zoro demanded, gliding the hand that was under your chin to your throat and applied just enough pressure to make sure to earn absolute submissiveness out of you.

« Y-You… » You choked out, the lack of oxygen marrying so well with your growing arousal.

His smirk only grew wider, a real testimony of the sick thoughts implanted in his brain that would make a demon blush. Both of his hand retreated to his side, gaze falling on the unmissable erection showing through his dark pants. His eyes alternated between you and the bulge in his pants, your mouth going dry at the wordless order. « If you want to be a whore, then be a good whore and suck me off, yeah? Don’t give me those eyes, you want it. »

You sunk to your knees, tongue wetting your lips in anticipation for what was bound to come. And whilst your eyes were stuck on his form, your fingers were busy tugging down at his pants to reveal his grey underwear stained with pre-cum. The sight of this alone was enough to send yet another wave of arousal down to your core. And as his cock sprung free from the constriction of his boxers, his girth slapping against his exposed abdomen and the tip rouge from anticipation, you were convinced you could’ve come undone from the sight of this alone.

« Suck. » He ordered, grabbing a fistful of your hair to force your towards his aching cock and the veil of pre-cum coating the tip.

And thus it began. You flattened your tongue, drawing a large lick from the base of his cock all the way to the tip where you finished with a few kitten licks, knowing damn well the head was where all the nerves devoted to pleasure were hidden. « Don’t tease and put your mouth to good use, whore. » Zoro said, almost betrayed by the groan threatening to be released.

Following the rules of performative language, you began to rock your head back and forth around his cock, making sure that your tongue was coating in a lustful love each inch of his girth whilst hums of pleasure were leaving your lips as you went. The hold of your hair in Zoro’s fist grew tighter and so did the metaphorical knots in his stomach as you went along, until the tip of his cock reached the back of your throat— such enticing sensation earned a growl out of him. Fuck.

« F-Fuck. Look at what you’re doing to me… Ah! Shit. Enough! » He ordered, yanking your head away from his cock, and the sight of the corners of your mouth dripping with the sweet marriage of his pre-cum and your drool could have provoked an orgasm out of him at this very moment.

« It’s too soon, and it’d be giving you what you want, huh? Too fucking bad, I’m going to cum in that sweet pussy of yours and you’re gonna love it. Ya’ hear me? » He asked without really asking, and taken by a rush of lust, you could only nod in return. « Y-Yes. » You stuttered. « You’re missing something. » Zoro added. You swallowed thickly before adding « Yes, yes, sir. » Your response caused an ill-intentioned snicker to fall from his lips. « That’s right. Now get on your back, and make sure to be as loud as you can, I want everyone on this damn ship to hear how I can make you scream. »

Zoro’s glorious height forced you to lay back until your spine touched the mattress where all the sins would soon break free. The smirk on his face never left, a pure testimony of what all the sinful deeds he was bound to accomplish. You were now trapped between his forearms, hips circled by his knees— bending under his dominance. « Did you wear that for me? » Zoro asked, slapping the string of the bikini top against your skin.

« I d-did, it’s all for you because I’m all yours. » Your response caused a chuckle to break from his lips, sweet words feeding his ego some more. And in a flash, his fingers had ripped said bikini top in half (you made a mental note that you now owed a serious debt to Nami), and there you were, (almost) in all you bare glory. « Fuck, if only you knew the things you do to me. »

Zoro wasted no time and threw all caution out of the window as his mouth latched onto your breasts, the motions of his tongue around your bud causing your spine to pay homage to the moon from how arched it was. His pink muscle flickered around your nipple before he swallowed your breast whole, his drool covering your flesh in a sinful veil. And because he was such a giver for his pretty girl, he gave the same treatment to the other breast whilst gasps left your lips over and over again at the methodical motions of his tongue, your anatomy held no secret for him.

« Are you going shy on me now? Did you forget what I said? » He trailed off, reducing the space between his lips and your ear, « I said I want you to be fucking loud. »

And with that, he left a trail of open-mouthed kisses down your stomach before tearing apart (once more) your poor martyr of a bikini bottom under your desperate attempts to keep it intact. Were you challenging him? Oh well… Zoro has always been the type to face any challenge thrown his way. « Zoro—… Sir, please! » You pleaded, not knowing really why.

« You’re such a desperate little thing, huh? » He leaned down to face your core, glistening in its lustful glory for him and him only. Zoro pressed a finger against your folds, dragging it vertically to obtain a finger pad covered in your slicks. « So fucking wet for me already? ‘Bet that shit cook can’t make you as wet as me. » He stated, confidence embedded in his every word. « Only you can make me feel this way, sir. » You replied before he crashed his lips onto yours in an uncharacteristically sweet manner to cut you off. « And why’s that? » The swordsman asked, already knowing the answer. « Because… Because I belong to you. » He pressed yet another kiss against your lips for having given the answer that had been lingering on his mind. « Good girl. »

Your reward came in the form of his tongue brushing your folds, flickering motions against your sensitive bud sending you in overdrive as continuous waves of pleasure washed over you ceaselessly, the knots in your stomach tightening each time his tongue touched you. Two of his digits poked your entrance, teasing you to let your torture last before they penetrated you. The sudden sensation caused you to let out a dragged whimper accompanied by his name coated in a sinful tone. « S-Sir please, please just fuck me— I can’t take the teasing, ahh, fuck, fuck! Please, please! » You begged, eyelids shutting close under the pleasure.

But your pleas fell in deaf ears as he kept pumping his fingers in and out of you, sucking onto your sensitive bud to build an orgasm within you that he was bound to deny. He knew you were close by the way you were holding his green hair, tugging him ever closer to your core to amplify the inferno burning within you. But alas, to your greatest displeasure, all the motions ceased in one go under the hint of mischief glowing in his eye.

« You’re gonna cum on my terms, and when I say so. Got it? » He seethed, knowing damn well that his own end was going to arrive soon. He gave his girth a few experimental pumps, allowing the pre-cum to cover his length before shoving the entirety of his cock in one go inside you, barely leaving enough time for your cunt to stretch correctly— and saying that a elongated moan left your lips was an euphemism, the sick grin plastered upon his face grew more and more as the sounds of pleasure drowned in his eardrums. « You’re so fucking tight, shit! » He breathed out, « Look at your pretty cunt swallowing me whole. »

The rhythm of his hips followed the scheme of a crescendo, each slam of his hips against your derrière drew a clearer portrait of both Zoro’s end and your own climax. The nature of the rhythm itself indicated that he was chasing after his own end, and with his head thrown back and his irises dilated under the hunger to satiate the raging fires breaking loose in his abdomen by the second. « S-Sir, it feels— Ah! It feels so good! »

The tip of his cock kissed ever so precisely the roof of your cervix where a panel of nerves designed to draw a lustful reaction out of you every time he thrusted into you. Your vision became more and more blurry until a liquid veil covered your eyes as pearls of tears gathered at the corners of your eyes. Under the pressure of each of Zoro’s thrusts, your body bent to his will and soon you had no longer control over your legs that used to be around his waist, only to be picked up by the swordsman who threw your legs over his shoulder, thus allowing him to reach a deeper part in you and the cries leaving your lips were just the proof of how good he made you feel.

More and more cries echoed against the wooden walls of the room, your sounds of pleasure marrying the groans falling from his lips in a cascade. « Ah, fuck, fuck! R-Right there, please! Shit…! » You pleaded to fuel him some more. His nails were digging into the luscious flesh of your thighs, drawing rouge crescents in his wake.

« Who do you belong to? » He groaned out, his eye admiring the lustful look on your face.

« Y-You! I belong to you, fuck, you a-and no one else! » You attempted to reply mid-moan.

But as much as Zoro knew your anatomy, you also happened to be an expert of his— and the way he planted his nails into your skin, the raw groans loosing their chains to be set free and the way his thighs were shaking… Everything announced the beginning of his own end.

« Cum with me… Now! » He ordered, letting his hand crash against your buttcheek in the process. And there it was, the marriage of two lovers under the spell of lust. The rhythm of his thrusts reached their apex, all whilst he painted your walls with the white color of passion. His own cum was mixing with your own elixir of pleasure leaking from your throbbing core as your cunt was clenching around his cock in despair. The sounds of his hips slamming against yours were long gone now, the room was solely filled with heavy breaths and his name falling from your lips over and over again like a forbidden prayer.

Although Zoro’s stamina knew no bounds, he felt like the oxygen had been knocked off of his lungs. But perhaps it was the price to pay if it meant he could observe you in all your post-orgasm glory after holding it inside you for so long. God, he was so proud of you, proud of every mark he had left onto your skin, proud of the way your skin gleamed under the sweat, proud of being your lover.

« ’S alright, ’s alright. I’m going to pull out, breathe. » Zoro demanded, the sweet tone reserved for you only finding its way back around his words. His digits snaked around his girth to pull out of you, only to witness the satisfying marriage of your cum and his own. You were so good to him.

And whilst you remained unable to move, Zoro fell to your side, his arms quick to lock you into an embrace as your head rested on his chest, his frenetics heartbeats echoing in your eardrums. You loved the peace of the aftermath of any sexual activity involving Zoro, you loved how peace seemed to bend his facial features in the most enticing way.

He was the first one to break the silence, pressing his lips against your forehead whilst he tugged you impossibly closer to him like a reminder that you were indeed here, and would always be. « So whose plan was this, hah? » He asked, earning a giggle out of you in response. « It was Nami’s, although Robin helped too. She said I would one hundred percent ‘get laid’ if I wore this. » You answered, head tilting towards the poor green bikini torn in pieces.

« That witch can go to hell. » Zoro groaned, but the raw tone of his voice was betrayed by the sweet caresses of his digits down your forearm.

« I mean, her plan did happen so I think it’s a win for her. It’s not like you regret what happened, mhm? » Alas, nothing but silence in return. « Zoro? » You called him, but an angel passed. « Zoro! » You repeated more sternly, and this time you were met with the sound of his snores— of course, typical Zoro fashion.

Well, you knew who you were going to thank now.

[corpsedaydream]

paint wars part 2

OKAY HERE IT IS! PART TWO TO PAINT WARS

if u haven’t read part one, i’ll link it right here

word count: 3k (yikes it’s a long one)

_______________________________

paint wars part 2

Things had been rough lately.

Real fucking rough.

You missed Corpse so much. You hadn’t spoken to each other since that fight at his apartment and that was fifty-four days ago now, almost two thirds of a season you’d been without him.

“I miss you.” You spoke aloud into the emptiness of your apartment, noting that the time on your phone now said 12:01am. It was officially now day fifty-five without speaking to him.

You swiped away all your notifications on your lock screen, ignoring everything and everyone that was trying to reach you right now so you could look at the person who was ignoring you. You wanted to look at the photo that was still your wallpaper. That first photo you’d ever taken together.

You went to change it on day thirty-eight of not speaking. On night thirty-seven of not speaking you’d gone out with your friends, they’d finally convinced you after a whole month of trying and you got absolutely wasted. So of course you’d called Corpse. But he didn’t answer, not any of the fifteen times you’d called. So that next morning, when you woke up hungover and saw that same lock screen photo and not one response from him, you told yourself you were going to change it. You tried to tell yourself you were angry, but it was just a coping mechanism to ignore the hurt that had been tunnelling through your heart since being without him. You spent an hour scouring tumblr and twitter for some aesthetically pleasing lock screen, but you didn’t save a single one. Nothing could compare to that photo of you and Corpse.

You then started to wonder if he’d listened to any of the voicemails you’d left the night before. You couldn’t remember them exactly, but you knew you definitely left four of them and how badly you wanted to know if the curiosity became too much to bear and he’d listened to them.

And he had.

On night thirty-seven, while you were out drinking, Corpse was in a deep sleep. He hadn’t been sleeping a whole lot lately, so finally, he’d crashed hard that night and slept through the calls you’d made to him. But even though he wasn’t aware of the calls in his sleeping state, you were still present in his dreamland. Every adventure his brain took him on was with you, maybe it was something that kept him asleep, the fact that you were right there in this fantasy. You were talking to him again, he could see your smile, hear your laugh, reach out and grab your hand, he could kiss you again. It was happiness. But then he woke up and he went to reach out for you in his bed, still caught up in the false wonder his dreams had provided him, only to find it was just him and reality slapped him fully awake. You weren’t there with him. You hadn’t been for a number of weeks. He missed you.

On day thirty-eight, when he spotted the missed calls from you on his phone, he cursed himself for being asleep and missing it. But would he had answered had he been awake? He wasn’t sure. So instead, he heard you speak to him for the first time in so long, even if it was through a voicemail you had left in the space of him not answering your calls.

“Oh, fuck- oh my god.”

That was it. That was the first voicemail, there was a lot of background noise but he had heard you so clearly. In your drunken state, you didn’t know what to say, so that’s what you had left with him, until you called back and left another.

"Hi.” You started it simple. He had the phone clutched so tightly in his hand, the device pressed so firmly against his ear, he didn’t want to miss a word. “I- I don’know what to say.” He noticed the slight slur to your words then, you were drunk when you had called. “I’m’a just go.”

You hung up again, but alas, there was another.

“Can I just ask... are you ignoring me?” Your voice was so meek, his chest hurt at the sound of it. He almost went to say no, but this was a one sided conversation, he’d missed the opportunity. “I miss you.” You hung up again, and he had to stop himself from replaying it over and over again to hear you say that you missed him.

But there was one last voice mail.

“I should stop calling, huh?” You sighed and he could picture you with a sad pout, your eyes all droopy with a mix emotion and alcohol. “But, I just want’a talk to you.” You confessed, then he heard another voice call your name in the background before they spoke to you and he listened. “(Y/N)! Here you are, what are you doing? That guys wondering where you are, he’s fucking hot-”

Corpse hung up then, he didn’t want to hear anymore. Jealousy was surging through him as the unwanted images of you with someone else plagued his mind and he threw his phone across his room. Wishing he hadn’t of started listening to those fucking voicemails.

What he didn’t know, though, is how the rest of that last voicemail went.

“I really don’t care.” You’d told your friend at the mention of the guy. Yeah, he was attractive and he was buying you drinks, but you wanted no one except Corpse. “Give me a sec.” You’d told your friend before walking away again, bringing your phone back to your ear to talk to the only person you wanted to talk to right now, even if he wasn’t on the other end of that call. “I hope you didn’t hear that, but if you did, don’t worry it. I’m g’na go home now.” You sighed and looked up at the night sky, there was no shooting star, or really any stars at all because of the light pollution from where you currently were, but you were still wishing that by some magic happenstance, Corpse would pick up his phone and speak to you again. “I wish I was going to yours.”

On day thirty-nine you cried so hard. You thought you had made it past this violently sobbing stage, this was exact state you’d cried yourself to sleep to each night for the first few weeks. Your heart was in so much pain, it was torn apart and you swore only one person had the power to stitch it back together, but he wasn’t there. You hadn’t heard a single thing from him. Were you two still together? Had you broken up? You weren’t even sure. But on day thirty-nine you cried that hard again because Corpse hadn’t responded at all to your calls or voicemails, so you convinced yourself he truly wanted nothing to do with you.

You’d been avoiding searching his name on social media, knowing it would send you into a spiral and you’d overthink every little thing but on day forty-two you’d noticed on twitter that he was playing games live. He wasn’t live himself, but you watched someone’s stream just to hear him again. You cried again doing this, because he was being exceptionally quiet, he wasn’t his normal self, he barely laughed once.

You wished you hadn’t clicked on it. The guilt you felt was already immense, but hearing him so not like himself made you feel even worse for causing all of this. You stopped watching, you couldn’t bear it. You knew you were to blame for all of this, you pushed him too far, you couldn’t believe how stupidly you had acted, you knew better and you did it anyway. The self attacking thoughts kept swirling your mind until you gave yourself a headache.

On day fifty-six of still not talking to each other, you ventured out to the beach with just your best friend. She’d been there for you a lot lately, she also felt bad about that night, but you tried to assured her it was your own fault. She didn’t know Corpse like you did, she didn’t know him at all, that’s why you felt to blame for not stopping the idea before it was too late.

“You should put sunscreen on.” Your best friend told you. You were laying on your towel in the direct sun, enjoying the warmth blasting into your skin, you hadn’t been to the beach in such a long time.

“Yeah.” You answered her, but you knew you weren’t going to. Another time, you would have, you knew the familiar sting of sunburn well and you normally put it on to look after your skin, but you hadn’t really been taking care of yourself too well lately, you just didn’t care enough.

On night fifty-six, you stood in front of your bathroom mirror looking over your body. You’d spent a lot longer at the beach than you realised and now you were burnt so badly and as red as a tomato. “Fuck.” You said out loud, turning and looking over your shoulder to inspect your back, it was just as red. You should’ve worn sunscreen. You left your bathroom to go find your aloe vera plant, only to find that it was dead. “Fuck!” You repeated, the one hope you had to help heal your skin even slightly quickly vanishing. “Oh, fuck. What am I going to do?”

That’s how you found yourself heading towards a 24 hour store to purchase whatever aloe vera cream or gel you could find, you knew it wouldn’t be as good as the plant itself, but you needed something. It was late and you were anxious as you neared the shop, you knew about this place from Corpse, he would often go there at odd hours to get whatever he needed. It was close to his place and you hadn’t driven around this area since that disaster of a night.

You squinted your eyes as you walked in and the harsh fluorescent lights pierced into your eyes after walking in from the night time. You were walking quickly and you told yourself it was because you were embarrassed about your skin being so burnt and you didn’t want anyone to see you like this, but it was really because you were so anxious over the thought of who you could potentially run into in this shop. Your swift steps brought you to the skin care isle and you let your eyes scan the shelves for the aloe vera you so desperately sought out.

“(Y/N)?”

You froze completely and you swore you even felt your heart stop beating. Hearing his voice speak your name again felt like lighting had struck right through you. This couldn’t be real, this had to be your imagination playing some sort of sick joke on you. Slowly, you turned towards the direction his voice had come from and sure enough, there he was. Dressed in all black, a beanie on his head and a mask over the bottom half of his face, your eyes locked with his. There was a pull in your chest, your heart had heard him, too and it wanted so badly to be with him, to be healed by him. You had thought up this scenario a million times over these past fifty-six days, of what would happen had you and him had a run in like this and in every single one you had so much to say, but right now, you were speechless.

Before you had a chance to even try to say anything if you managed to stop being stuck in silence, Corpse spoke again.

“Fucking hell,” He neared you and you sucked in a quick breath at his sudden movement. “Look how burnt you are.” You were wearing tights and an oversized hoodie, so your entire body was covered, but your face was just as burnt and clearly he had noticed. 

This was another aspect that didn’t fit into your scenarios you’d thought up about this moment. You’d imagined you would’ve look amazing. But instead of looking like some beautiful mermaid, you were the same colour as Ariel’s hair from The Little Mermaid. “I know, don’t look at me.” You huffed and dropped your head down, letting your beach waved hair fall around your face.

“You didn’t wear sunscreen?”

“Obviously not.”

“That was silly.”

“I know.”

“Are you sore?”

“Yeah.” It felt so natural to have this back and forth with him. It was brief, but it was enough for your heart to kick back into gear and speed up.

He stayed silent for a prolonged moment so you looked back to his face and his eyes were on your face but it was his turn to glance away then and you took the opportunity to really soak in his side profile. You’d even missed just being able to look at him. 

“Why are you here?” He asked you.

“I need aloe vera and I knew this place would be open.”

“You’re not using your plant?” Butterflies fluttered inside of you that he remembered a simple mundane fact that you preferred the healing touch of the actual plant for sunburn as opposed to what was bought at a store in a bottle.

“It died.”

Corpse suddenly looked back to you and much to your surprise, he laughed.

“Why are you laughing?!”

“How do you kill a succulent?”

“You know I’m not good at gardening and shit like that.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t think you’d be able to kill a succulent.” He laughed harder and you started to smile, he was teasing you but it felt so right. And hearing his laughter filled you with a warmth you’d been missing.

“Shut up.” You told him, but you were beginning to laugh too. “It’s hard to keep plants alive.”

“(Y/N), succulents are pretty much impossible to kill.”

“Okay, I get it, I didn’t purposely murder my aloe vera plant.”

“Oh, baby.” The pet name slipped so easily from his lips but it caught you both off guard, so the both of you stopped laughing and your postures stiffened.

Briefly, your eyes met but each of you darted your vision elsewhere. However, neither of you made no effort to move away from one another.

“Sorry.” Corpse said softly.

“It’s okay.” And it was, so okay. You wanted to tell him that hearing him call you baby was all you’d been wanting to hear again over these almost fifty-seven days without him. “I should really get this aloe vera gel on me, though.” You really didn’t want to leave him, but you couldn’t stand in this store forever.

“Are you sunburnt all over?” He asked.

“Yeah.” You sighed

And just as instinctively as the pet name had slipped out, his hands started to move towards the sleeve of your jumper. But he stopped himself when you flinched slightly and he quickly realised what he was doing. “Sorry, can I see?”

“I mean, you can, but I don’t want you to do it because it does really fucking hurt. That’s why I jumped, not because I don’t want you to touch me.” You answered him quickly. “I do want you to touch me- wait, I mean, no.” If your face wasn’t already red from the sunburn, it would have become red then from the blush you could feel forming. And if your skin wasn’t in pain you would have facepalmed yourself. “Sorry.” You apologised then.

“It’s okay.”

Shaking your head, you began to gently slide the sleeve of your big hoodie up.

“Fuck, (Y/N).” Corpse cursed, concern filling him as your skin was practically glowing from the burn it had copped. “You can’t do that to yourself.”

“I know.”

“How long were you at the beach?”

“All day pretty much.”

“You’re that burnt all over?”

“Yeah, I mean, some spots are worse. I think my back and shoulders are probably the worst. They hurt the most.”

He moved to step around you then, disappearing out of your sight as he was now standing behind you. “Can I?”

“Yeah, just be careful.”

And he made sure to keep his movements cautious, he decided on looking from the top, his hands grabbing the neck on the back of your hoodie to pull it back ever so gently so he could inspect. His eyes widened in a combination horror, worry and sympathy. He’d seen you get sunburnt before, but never to this extent. “Oh my fucking god.” The contrast between where the strap of your togs sat over your shoulder, blocking a sliver of your skin from the sun to keep it its natural colour versus the red that was brought from the burn was insane. “It looks like someone has painted you.”

“I mean, I guess the sun did. Just in a really painful way.”

“You’re not planning on going to the beach anytime soon, right?” Corpse carefully released your hoodie then and stepped in front of you once more. Distress was so present on his face, despite most of it being covered. He was so worried about you in this moment.

“Definitely not. The only thing I’m planning on is not going outside in any sunlight until my skin is healed.”

“Living like me.”

“Guess so.”

“My aloe vera plant is alive.” He stated.

“Wow, you’re really just going to flex that right now? Trying to kick me while I’m down.” You joked back, assuming he was teasing you.

“No, I mean...” He trailed off, his eyes struggling to stay on yours as he continued. “You could come over and use it, I know you like the real stuff better and I could help do your back, or wherever you can’t reach.” He was nervous, but he really didn’t have to be.

You could feel it happening, your heart beginning to heal.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. Do you want to?”

“Yeah.”

[themonotonysyndrome]

REDACTED verse - When Lovely meets Angel

Summary: When the boyfriends are away, their partners try their best to be functioning members of society. Spoiler alert: they failed. 

Tw: [Mentions of Adam], [Profanity] and [Very, very brief mention of drugs. Like, half a sentence]

I shared this oneshot in the Discord server and I thought to share it here too before uploading it on AO3 later this weekend. 

-

You smile as your eyes do their best to track Vincent’s every move. Your head spins as your boyfriend flits from one room to another, never pausing for even a second. His duffel bag is lying beside you on the couch, gradually full of clothes, toiletries and other travelling necessities as he chucks them in Mach speed. 

You pick up the clothes that didn’t make it into the bag. You fold them nicely before placing them in with the rest. 

“Alright, I’ve stocked up the pantry to last at least for a few weeks, b-but I’ll be back by Sunday so don’t worry.” The blur that was Vincent said as he ran from their shared bedroom to the kitchen. With a fond shake of your head, you observe the Vampire made one last round. 

Letting Vincent fuss is your way of helping him calm down. And sure enough, it only takes a few minutes until your boyfriend is satisfied with the apartment - from the wards that he erected to the well-stocked kitchen and rows of laundry detergents. With the way he prepared for his departure, you couldn’t help but want to remind Vincent that he’ll only be leaving for three days; not three months. 

“Do you have Alexis’ number, Lovely? Sam’s?” Vincent asks - again - in concern as he pad towards you and the duffel bag. “Hang on, I’ll forward them to you now -” 

You grab his hand before he could reach for his phone and force him to sit beside you on the couch. You peck him on the cheek to startle him. No matter how many times you’ve done this; Vincent always reacts the same. Startled with a tinge of red dusting his pale cheeks. A simple kiss is enough to leave him speechless and it never fails to make your heart skip a beat at how precious he is. 

“Yes, you gave them to me this morning. I have their numbers on speed dial for any emergency of the Adam kind.” You easily assure him, only to backtrack quickly when you see how wide his eyes went. Oh yikes, bad move! Bad move! “N-Not that there will be any problem! Haha! I mean, you’re only going away with Will for three days, right? I can hold the fort, don’t worry!” 

Vincent bit his lower lip, still hesitant. “I wish I didn’t have to go, Lovely. It hurts to be away from you…” His head tilts down and holds your hand tight, yet always mindful of his Supernatural strength. “Sometimes… sometimes I could still see you in Adam’s arms, so pale and sick… your blood on his mouth - ”

“Hey, hey, Vince? Look at me please.” You gently tilt his chin using your hand that wasn’t captured by your worrisome boyfriend. You made sure to properly look him in the eyes before smiling softly. “You got me in time and for that? I’m forever grateful, but that’s in the past, OK? I’m here now with you! We both have been making good progress at D.A.M.N so that has to count for something, yeah? We’re both stronger than we were before.” 

That earns a tiny smile from Vincent and you mentally cheer in victory. “You always know what to say, huh, Lovely? And yeah, we’re pretty badass now, huh? A Vampire and an Electro Energetic? We’ll conquer this city in less than a month.” He joked. 

You try to picture it: you and Vincent - the King and Queen of Dahlia. The first thing you would do is declare PJ Friday - where everyone must wear PJs every Friday and those that wear the silliest PJs get brownie points. Collect enough of them and they’ll get a free meal in the most expensive restaurant Dahlia has to offer. Vincent can handle the boring stuff like, governing and health care. 

...Now that’s a thought; Vincent as a politician. 

Ah wait - Will would probably be disappointed in them if they tried to do a hostile takeover of this city and you couldn’t bear to disappoint him. After all, no one can pull off the perfect sad dad look other than Vincent’s Sire. Not even your own dad! 

“ - Lovely? Uh, Earth to Lovely? You there?” 

Vincent’s warm voice broke you off from your mad train of thoughts. You flash a sheepish grin when he realised that you haven’t paid a single word he said. Vincent wants to appear annoyed but his lips are twitching, as if he’s holding back from laughing at the dumbfounded expression on your face. 

“Sorry, babe. I spaced out because Will was disappointed in us.”  

“...What? Will? Lovely, what the - ”

“Anyway, don’t worry about me.” You quickly interject before you have to explain yourself. “You got me food, Alexis’ and Sam’s numbers are on my speed dial and my powers have been growing nicely over the last few classes. I got this; you got this.” To seal the deal you added, “And I promise to call you twice a day; in the morning and before I go to bed. Sounds good?” 

That finally assured Vincent. The tension melts away from his taunt shoulders and when he kisses you, it’s slow and sweet. You would’ve loved to wrap your arms around his shoulders and pull him on top of you and turn this into something more, but Will would surely call him if Vincent is late. 

Vincent moans when you pull away; disappointed and slightly frustrated. “Easy there, Vince. I’ll make sure to give you a very warm welcome when you get back.” You purr, loving how his eyes lid at your promise. 

But alas, as much as you love to drag Vincent to the bedroom, work comes first. So you allow Vincent to fuss around a little more before he slings the duffel bag over one shoulder, kisses you goodbye and leaves. 

Now, you planned this. You have a whole itinerary in your head for the days that Vincent is on a business trip with the King of the Solaire Clan. Assignments that need to be done, Despacito to learn on the piano (neither of them knew why Alexis dropped off an upright piano in their apartment on a random ass Wednesday night and when asked, she just cackled before pulling off a Batman and vanished into the night. So Vincent gave up trying to pester the answer out of her. You still think it’s some sort of an elaborate prank), boba pizza to cook for dinner tomorrow and a list of video games to pre-order so really, you would be so busy for the upcoming days that you wouldn’t even have the time to miss Vincent. 

If you repeat that long enough, you hope that’ll become true. 

Glancing at the clock hanging on the living room wall, you sigh at the time.10.30 PM. A little early to get ready for bed but hey, it’s not like there’s anything else that you want to do now. 

With little fanfare, you make sure that the apartment is locked and secure, switch off the lights before heading to the bedroom for your nightly ablutions.

-

Ok, that part about the itinerary? Yeah, that’s completely out of the window the moment you wake up missing Vincent’s arms around you. 

The gentle and warm sun rays pierce through the sheer curtains, promising a bright day ahead of you, but all you could think about is the space in this bedroom. Was the bed always this big? Was the bedroom always this quiet? Those questions rattled in your brain and it really doesn’t help that you can smell Vincent’s faint cologne lingered on the pillows. Soothing vanilla that never fails to clear your mind as opposed to sandalwood and bergamot. Vincent once claimed that the scent is too fancy for someone like him. 

Right now though? His cologne sends a pang of longing in your heart in his absence, and it’s only the first day! 

“I can’t stay here.” You decided out loud when the tangle of sleepiness ebbed away. Kicking the thick duvet off your body, you stomp to the bathroom to shower, dress up and quickly leave the apartment with nothing but your phone and backpack. 

You didn’t want to return to an empty apartment, so what better than walking around the city to distract yourself? Grab some breakfast at a new cafe, maybe do some window shopping afterwards… yeah, that sounds way better than anything you’ve planned before. 

Joggers pass you by as you walk through the park and the city slowly comes back to life. People are out and about, going through their monotonous day. Some are catching the bus, others are like her, eager to find something to eat. 

You recall that your classmate mentioned that they and someone named Damien found a Taiwanese bakery/cafe that recently opened up near the city’s library; a quaint little shop, squeezed between a hardware shop and a health & beauty care chain store. You can still remember how their eyes lit up as they excitedly described the brioche and the strawberry tiramisu they ate with vivid details. 

So that’s where you’re headed off to now. 

Apparently, the bakery is closer than you thought when you cut corners and jump through the shortcuts. Being born and raised here in Dahlia like so many others, you knew this city like the back of your hand. Though the existence of Shifters, Vampires, Daemons and more were a slap in the face to you.

Oh, that reminds you, be sure to ask Vincent if the Vampires have anything similar to Fangtasia here in this city. 

The bell above the door chimes when you enter the bakery. The sign outside says ‘OPEN’ but since it’s still quite early in the morning, you and a couple sitting at a table near the corner are the only customers currently. Manning behind the cashier is a young woman and her co-worker setting up freshly baked goods behind the display glass. 

You made a beeline to the counter. 

“Good morning. Uh, can I please have one sea salt coffee - regular size - one red bean mooncake and, umm…” You paused to scan the menu laid before you. “And a marble taro.” 

There. That's sort of a healthy breakfast, right? 

The young woman hardly bats an eye at your order. She drawl out the total amount of your food and drink to which you hand her some cash before choosing a table beside the large window so you could see the city and her people go about their lives. The scent of freshly baked pastries, hot chocolates and brewed coffees wash over you pleasantly. 

You couldn’t help but wonder if Vincent would love this place as much as you do… 

The cashier came over with a tray of your order before your musing could spiral down further. You thank her, snap a picture of your food and coffee for Vincent before enjoying your breakfast. It’s a perfect morning, well, almost a perfect morning… 

Halfway through your coffee, your phone vibrates. Vincent had texted back: 

‘Looks delish, Lovely! Make sure to finish your meal, OK? My flight was a nightmare - I’ll spare you the details - but Will and I reached the airport safely. I’ll call you soon, Lovely. I love you, always.’ 

Vincent’s text helps to fill his absence, somewhat. You polish off the last bit of your coffee and exhale loudly; there’s no use moping around. Adventure awaits! After all, there’s never a dull day here in Dahlia. For all you know, something is right around the corner just for you! 

Tummy warm and full, you bask in the morning light for a few more minutes before exiting the bakery. 

...And promptly collide with a walking furnace. Because seriously, the moment your chest hits them, it feels as if their body heat lunges at you.

“Ow!” You fell and landed hard on your ass. Whoever had the misfortune to collide against you, they were a tad taller and seemed to be in a rush to be able to hit you with an impact. 

“Oh fuck! I’m so so sorry! Are you alright!? I ran too fast because I always missed out on their marble taros! Oh gosh, oh gosh; can you hear me? Shit, I really hope I didn’t hurt you too badly…” The stranger rambled worriedly. 

“I-I’m fine. Just got the wind knocked out of me.” You assured them and gladly grabbed the offered hand. They gently pull you up from the pavement. 

“You sure? I can take you to the hospital right now if you want!” They pressed on, eyes checking for any sign of injuries on your body. “Just after I buy my pastries though.” 

You didn’t expect the blatant honesty; the idea that some loaves of bread are this person's top priorities crack you up. You couldn’t help it, so you burst out a giggle. 

“I’m good, I’m good; don’t worry.” You hiccup and wipe a stray tear from the corner of your right eye. You can’t believe this. “Go get your bread and oh, for the record? I totally get why you rush here. Their marble taro is really something else. You better hurry up; I heard the cashier said they’ll be making the last batch for the day.”

You smirk when the walking furnace’s eyes widen in horror. They darted into the bakery without a single word. The bell chimes loudly when they rush to yank the door and scramble towards the counter.

Just for the fuck of it, you lean against the window and decide to wait. Snippets of frantic conversation can be heard inside and it wasn’t long before the bell tinkle once more. 

The stranger that bumped into you pout, clutching a huge paper bag of pastries close to their chest as if they feared you would snatch it. “You lied.” 

“Shocker, I know.” You tease and then you feel your blood froze despite the warm morning. You suddenly recalled where and from whom you heard those words before and quickly stomped the image out of your head. 

“Uh, dude? Are you sure you’re alright? You look super pale.” The stranger narrowed their eyes on you. Despite the blatant concern on their face and how genuinely friendly and cheerful their voice is, you get the feeling that they’re trying to pull you apart by the seams to see if you would lie or not. 

So you opt for the honest option. “I will be.” You assured them. “Just some… bad memories pop up.” 

“Huh, well that sucks.” They glance at the bag of pastries for a moment, silent and contemplating. They then thrust it practically in your face before you could do so much as flinch. “You want some? Food always helps me feel good when I’m sad.” 

The loaves of bread smelled really good but for the second time, you giggled. “No, no, I’m full. Thank you though; that’s very kind of you to offer.” 

“It’s only the right thing to do.” They reply with an easy shrug. You get the feeling that the stranger’s kindness is something remarkable. “The name is -” 

Across the street, a truck driver pressed the horn when the car in front of him refused to budge despite the traffic lights having switched from red to green for ten minutes now.

“ - but you can call me Angel; all my friends do. Now that we’ve bumped into one another, your destiny just altered. Our fates will forever be intertwined once you give me your name.” 

Oh, you like where this is going.

“I’m - ” The driver in front of the truck kicked open his door and proceeded to shout at the truck driver. A line of cars gradually formed behind the vehicle and horns began to blare as a brawl broke out in the middle of the road. “ - nice to meet you!” 

“A lovely name…” Here your new friend - Angel - trailed off, their eyes appraising your body. “For a lovely soul. Lovely. Huh. Can I call you that?” 

Gorgeous, brimming with moxie mix with a spoonful of friendly flirting? Oh, you like them more and more by the second. 

Also, you idly wondered if there’s some weird magic attached to your name or else this is going to be a pattern every time you introduce yourself. 

“Sure.” You answered, and the two of you shook hands. 

“Say… who do you think would win? Godzilla or King Kong?” 

“Psh, is that even a question? Godzilla, obviously. He’s the king of monsters for a reason! And grandpa got his Atomic Breath; what does Kong even have?” 

“You. I like you. I have a feeling that this is going to be the start of a beautiful friendship.” 

When there’s no escaping from Angel’s octopus arm of love and friendship around your shoulders, you let yourself be swept away. 

-

“So you’re an Electro Energetic?” 

“Yup.” 

“Got any plans on what you’re going to be in the future?” 

“To shed my mortal body and transform into King Ghidorah.”

“...Can I be the left head?”

“I was hoping you’d ask that. We need the right head, though.” 

“I’ll give my friend a call; they’re a Freelancer studying at D.A.M.N too. Maybe you’ve seen them around?”

-

“Wait - you said your boyfriend is a Vampire?”

“He’s more of a dork than a Vampire, but yeah.”

“Cool, cool. Hey, my boyfriend is a Werewolf. Do you know what this means?” 

“...Twilight marathon?” 

“Twilight marathon! We have to do it. Let’s go, Lovely; you’re going to crash at my place for the best movie night of your life!” 

“I’ll grab some food and drinks from my place. Will be there in twenty minutes.” 

-

“This is the third time I’ve watched these movies and I think they just got worse over the years.” You complained, chugging down your fourth can of Red Bull. You don’t drink, so you wondered if this is how it feels like to slowly go drunk. Or high. 

You’re in your sleep wear - a simple black shorts and one of Vincent’s t-shirts. Exhausted, stomach bloated with snacks; you feel like shit. Your body is seconds away from saying fuck it and crash down. 

And yet you’ve never felt so alive before. 

The time on your phone says it's 3.23 AM; you and Angel slough through the first two movies and now finally, the end credits for Eclipse roll down on the TV screen. Angel lives with their boyfriend - who was on a business trip, coincidentally - in a very homely apartment. When you first entered, you could tell just what sort of couple they are. 

The place looks as if a small tornado tried to turn the apartment upside down but was fended off just barely - little knick knacks such as rainbow beaded bracelets were carelessly thrown on the kitchen counter behind a microwave, a crop top with printed bongo cats floating within a glittered galaxy is drape over a dining chair, three heart-shaped balloons knock against one another from the living room’s ceiling and for some reason, the USB stereo is on the floor playing Black Pink’s Pretty Savage. 

The other half of the apartment - the more organised side - are filled with neatly shelved books of all genres, an untouched bowl of fruits are on the coffee table and most of the expensive-looking dishes and silverwares are displayed behind a glass cabinet. Those were probably gifts from family and friends. 

You spend an entire day here, engaging in stupid but fun conversations with Angel, painted each others’ nails and even shop online for the sluttiest outfit that you two could find just for the hell of it before binge-watching the entire Twilight series. 

Unlike you, however, Angel is buzzing around like a hyperactive bunny on crackhead energy. Halfway through New Moon, she busted out stacks of colourful sticky notes, some thumbtacks and a huge yarn ball. You watch with utter fascination as they begin to furiously write down every little thing about the Vampires and Werewolves representations from the movies to your and their boyfriend. 

It’s 3.25 AM now. The entire living room wall looks like an abstract form of an art piece, made of common stationeries. 

Hair in a messy bun, a stick of strawberry pocky dangling from their lips like a lit cigarette, a black sharpie in one hand and dressed in black cat onesie, Angel tapped on the piece of red sticky note that wrote ‘culture appropriation or nah?’

“So what have we learned so far?” 

“Vampires don't sparkle.” You immediately piped up and this time, cracked open a can of black coffee. A brand name from Japan, but the bitter tang immediately zolt your already fried nerves to maximum level. You love it. “Period.” 

“Noted! Now, does this make Stephenie Meyer racist!?” 

You actually had to pause and consider that. “Will need to get you back on that one.” 

Angel hurried to scribble ‘remind Lovely for feedback’ inside the same note. “Very well. We shall move on to the Werewolves.” They start to list down the characteristics of the Werewolves portrayed in the movies and then compare them to their boyfriend; but the thing is, they didn’t realise that they verbally list down the quirks of their Shifter lover instead. 

You find it cute that Angel rambled on and on about someone named Davey, so you didn’t interrupt them. Hell, you’d be the same with Vincent. 

It wasn’t long before the two of you got sidetracked from comparing your lovers to spilling the tea about your relationships. 

“After we first slept together, I said to Davey, “Thanks for the sex, bro” complete with a peace sign and a wink. He got so mad that he refused to let me off the bed until I promised to stay.” Angel laughs fondly. They tear open a bag of Cheetos Puffs and throw one into your open mouth. The two of you celebrate with a high-five. 

“Vince freaked out when I told him he was my first.” You chewed, swallowed and washed the after taste of the junk food with even more coffee. Who needs sleep when you could reach divinity with cans of Red Bulls, Kirin Fire coffees and junk foods. “He was extra sweet to me the next day as if he was trying to make up for how rough he was. You could totally see how precious he is from Pluto.” 

“That’s so cute!” Angel cooed. “You’ve landed the golden D, dude. Congrats.” 

“Sounds like you’re the same. To us!” 

You clink your can of coffee with Angel’s bottle of Mountain Dew. 

Eventually, the night made way to the rising sun and the final scene of Breaking Dawn came to a close. The living room is a total mess - blankets and pillows are strewn all over the floor, empty bags of chips, cans and bottles are underneath the coffee table and you swore that one rolled underneath the couch and the wall is still a sad, modern version of cubism with strings. 

“So…” You tilt your head to stare at a wide-eyed Angel, still buzzing with energy. “Want to play Mario Kart? Loser has to let the winner dress them for the day.” 

“You’re on! I hope you like crop tops” 

-

Vincent couldn’t stop bouncing his leg. The airport is bustling with people rushing for their early morning flights despite dawn barely peeking from the horizon. Like most of the humans around them, Vincent and Will are waiting for their boarding gate to open. 

Speaking of Will, he had wandered off to inquire about their time of arrival to one of the help counters somewhere near the vending machines that they passed. 

These past three days felt like three years without Lovely at his side. Vincent was an idiot to think that a few simple phone calls were enough to chase the yearning of his undead heart for his lover. His sweet and strong, Lovely. 

How are they right now? Judging from the different time zones, Vincent reckoned that it’s nearly midnight where the city of Dahlia is right now. Is Lovely getting ready for bed? What did they have for dinner? How was their day? 

An amused chuckle startled Vincent from his musing. “Oh Vincent, did your phone somehow insult you? You’ve been glaring at it for at least five minutes since I’ve returned.” 

“G-Geez! Don’t sneak up on me like that, old man.” Vincent mumbled, he nearly dropped his phone from his Sire’s sudden and silent appearance. 

“Apologies. Perhaps you should give them a call?” Will suggested as he took a seat beside him. He offers a warm, knowing smile at Vincent’s confused expression. “You wore a lovelorn expression when you stared at your phone. Do us both a favour and call your Lovely, hmm?” 

“...I shouldn’t. They’re probably sleeping - ”

“Maybe. Or maybe not. For all you know, they might still be up, waiting for you to call them.” 

Vincent gave in. He desperately needed to hear Lovely's voice. Besides, their sleepy whines are so adorable and he misses them terribly. 

Will occupied himself with a John Grisham book while Vincent pressed familiar numbers and held his phone up to his ear. Lovely answered in less than a minute. 

“Hey, Lovely.” Vincent greets, feeling the uneasiness and longing untangled themselves from his chest. He can’t wait to return home and have them in his arms again. The next time he has to go on a business trip again, he’ll bring Lovely along. If Will has a problem with it, he could take Alexis. “Sorry for calling you again so late at night. I… I just need to hear your voice again. Anyway, are you on the bed - ”

“Oh my god, did you just throw your underwear at me!?” 

“Uh, Lovely?” 

Vincent immediately pull the phone away when his ear is assaulted by a cacophony of K-pop music blaring in the background, accompanied by an obnoxious laugh of glee and Lovely’s mutterings of “That slut is going to get it now”, “300% sugar in your boba tea? Dude, just do cocaine instead!” and “Oh, Dilf alert! He has a French accent too? A solid 8/10 from me, definitely.” 

Beside him, Will snorts. He happily ignores the glare Vincent threw at him and flips a page. 

But for a brief, crazy moment, Vincent was struck with fear at the thought of his lover harbouring a secret crush on his Sire. He still remembers how freely Lovely blush and giggle whenever Will was around.

“Lovely? Is everything alright?” Vincent tries again, straining to hear through the music and someone’s chattering. Who is with his Lovely past midnight? He starts to worry and feel… a little uncomfortable. 

“Vincent? What’s up, baby? You don’t usually call me so late.” Lovely reply, sounding a bit distracted. Suddenly, Vincent heard a crash, followed by a, “It’s not broken! It’s all good!” 

“Where are you? What’s going on? Are you at a party?” Vincent didn’t demand, he inquired as firmly as possible. Flashes of his Lovely dancing at a club or hanging out with some faceless man and woman keep popping in his mind. It stirs his bloodlust. 

Will idly pat his hand to calm Vincent down, eyes still glued to his book. 

“I’m at home; had a friend over for the night. The apartment is just… too quiet without you.” 

Lovely’s easy and genuine admittance settled something feral inside of Vincent. He guessed that his lover and their friend must be having a sleepover. 

“I’m sorry that I had to leave, Lovely.” Vincent murmurs. “Will and I are at the airport right now. We should be boarding in thirty minutes.” Here, he paused and continued in a quieter tone, “I’ve missed you so much, Lovely. I’ve left my heart with you and… well, it’s just not the same without you.”

“See!? Prime example of a golden D there, Lovely!” Someone - Vincent assumed is his lover’s friend - shriek in the background. 

Their sudden shriek didn’t surprise him. What did, however, was another, stranger’s voice joining in their conversation. 

From a couple of seats, right in front of Vincent. Right here in the airport. 

“Don’t shriek into the phone, Angel! Are you trying to make me go deaf in one ear!?” 

The man - no, Shifter, grumbled. Vincent could smell the scent of lush forest and dirt around him; a Werewolf, then. But his nature wasn’t the reason why Vincent’s jaw is hanging open. 

Will, who had given up the pretence of reading his book, couldn’t hold himself back from grinning widely. He already connected the dots, unlike Vincent. “Oh my, isn’t that Alpha Shaw? He must be on a business trip as well! What a small world.” 

Luckily Vincent was clutching his phone tightly or not he would’ve dropped it in shock. Alpha Shaw? No way… David Shaw!? The Alpha of the Werewolf’s pack in Dahlia!? What the fuck - 

“Turn down the volume, Angel, before the neighbours call the police!” Lovely shouted back. 

In front of him, Vincent and Will watch the impressive scowl on David Shaw’s - the Werewolf King of Dahlia, himself - face. “Uh, excuse me? The fuck? It’s way past midnight, Angel. Where are you; who are you with?” 

“Looks like your lover made a new friend.” Will said in mock-whisper. Even though both of them knew full well that the Shifter wouldn’t be able to hear them from where they are in his human form. “I have a feeling that the Shaw pack and the Solaire clan will be closely in touch in the coming days.” 

Vincent shakes his head; truly, his Lovely is something else. Without hesitation, the Vampire Prince got up to introduce himself to the annoyed Werewolf. He didn’t take it personally when the Shifter shot him a glare for interrupting his phone call. If looks could kill, well, let’s just say that Vincent is thankful that being a Vampire means that he’s not about to be a Werewolf’s chew toy anytime soon. 

“Hi. I’m Vincent Solaire - yes, you heard that right - and before you ask, I’m pretty sure our lovers are currently hanging out at my place right now.” 

That got the Alpha to do a wonderful imitation of a statue. He wouldn’t look out of place at the Louvre, Vincent thought.

David exhales loudly - as if he damn close to being done with everything that this world has to offer - before addressing his lover on the other side of the phone. “The things you got yourself into, you damn troublemaker.” No doubt that David probably isn’t too keen to know that his mate is friends with a Vampire’s lover, but Will has a knack for turning enemies to allies; he’ll let his Sire deal with the politics once they get back to Dahlia. 

“You love me!” Angel smugly replied. “Oh and guess what? We binge watched the entire Twilight movie series and we got some questions!” 

“And uh, just a heads up.” Lovely’s voice hesitantly chimes through Vincent’s phone. “We haven’t slept since you guys left. I mean, I slept the day you left Vince, but, uh...” 

Vincent winces and politely ignores David’s flow of cursing under his breath. 

They left home for only three days, surely their apartments are still standing and their lovers aren’t drunk, high or planning to commit anarchy!

...Right? 

[darthkruge]

Poe Dameron x Reader ~ Take Mine

Summary || On your first mission as Commander of Blue Squadron, you take Poe’s X-wing. Unfortunately, it doesn’t go as planned. 

Warnings || Some injuries and a bit of blood? I didn’t go super in detail, though

Words || 2.2k

A/N || This is my first time writing for Poe and I’m so scared and I tried to be accurate and if it’s not I apologize but if I spent another minute staring at this draft I will scream. Special thanks to @poestardust and @buckysbeloved because y’all were both super fucking supportive and without that this might not have been posted! I am now officially adding Poe to the people I write for and while my requests for full fics are closed, I am more than willing to do little blurbs/hc’s or hear any and all of y’alls soft/angsty thoughts for that wonderful Flyboy. My status of requests gives more insight into all of this :)

gif credit

You groaned, shaking your head as you racked your brain for a way to get out of this. Your X-wing was supposed to be fixed a week ago, a solid few days before your mission was set to start. But, alas, Red Squadron had a bit of a rough mission coming off Hoth and needed repairs more rapidly than you, so your starfighter was put on the low priority list. 

Normally, this wouldn’t be a problem. You could be patient. Normally. But you had just been promoted to Commander of Blue Squadron and your first mission left in two standard hours. 

You walked through the door of your room, trying to find a solution but continuing to come up empty. 

“Sweetheart?” Your head perked up at Poe’s voice, the concern clear in his words. 

“What happened, why aren’t you with the rest of the Squadron getting ready?” 

“My starfighter isn’t ready.” You said, trying to make sense of the words as they came out.

Poe blinked. “Still?” 

“Yeah, the other repairs are taking longer than usual and it’s not ready and it won���t be ready and I have to lead my team on a supply drop and try to not get everyone killed and I don’t even have my kriffing X-wing!” Your voice shook, the lack of control making you anxious as you paced back and forth through your quarters. 

Poe’s hands found their way to your shoulders, steadying you. “Look at me, okay? Breathe for a second,” Poe gave you a slight smile as you nodded, closing your eyes as you took a deep breath. “Yeah, just like that. It’s gonna be just fine, we’ll figure it out!” 

Now, the panic creeped back into your expression. “How?!” 

Poe thought for a second, mentally grasping at straws before his eyes widened in realization. “Take mine!”

“What?!”

“Take my X-wing! It’s all ready to go and Black Squadron isn’t set to go on our next mission for another two weeks! You’ll be back well before then, it’ll work out just fine!” 

“But- I can’t just take your X-wing, Poe!”

“Yes you can! Come on, I don’t really see what other options you have! Just take it, please? It’ll bring you good luck.” 

You sighed, realizing he was right. “Okay, okay, fine!”

Poe smiled, leaning in to peck you on the lips. “Now, go! You don’t want to be late, do you, Commander?” 

“Oh, no, definitely not, Commander! That would set a horrible example for my team!” You quipped back before leaning in once more. “I love you.” You whispered. 

“I love you too.” He smiled back. “Seriously!” He said with a laugh, “Go!” 

“Going!” You called over your shoulder as you ran to the hanger. 

A week and two days later, that conversation was the only thing on your mind. You were desperately steering your- no, Poe’s- X-wing away from the fleet of First Order ships flying straight for your Squadron. Somehow, they’d learned of your plans for the supply drop and decided to swing by. How thoughtful of them. 

“Okay, everyone. Just hang tight, shoot if you’ve got a clear shot but no one’s trying to be a hero, alright? First priority is getting home safe.” You said through the open channel.

 You smiled as you heard your team voice their approval, ending their messages with a “Commander” here and there. Right now, all you were doing was hoping you were deserving enough of that title to get everyone back in one piece. 

Looking to make sure everyone was in line, you felt your heart drop as you counted the starfighters. Everyone was there, minus one. Where was Snap? Craning your neck, you swore as you saw him caught on the right side, boxed in by two First Order TIE fighters. 

You quickly opened a private communication channel. “Tallie?”

“Yes, Commander L/N?”

“Make sure everyone stays ahead of the TIE fighters, okay? Keep moving forward.”

“Y/N what are you talking about?”

You sighed, consciously working to keep your voice even and calm. “Snap’s stuck and I’m not leaving him. I’ll be fine, just a little bit behind you. Just… get them home.” 

“But-”

“Please.” 

You felt guilty for being short with her, but you had to do it. If you didn’t, she’d know how kriffing terrified you were. 

After waiting a moment, she sighed. “Okay. Be safe, Commander.”

“Same to you.” You replied, shutting off the channel. You forced the tears back in your eyes and refused to let your thoughts dwell any more on your Squadron or that beautiful, dark haired pilot you knew was waiting for you. 

You turned Poe’s X-wing and sent a prayer to the Maker as you made a bee-line for one of the two TIE fighters and fired, shooting one directly. You laughed, almost giddy at how spot-on the hit was. 

“Commander?” Snap’s voice filtered through the communication system. 

“Hang on, I’ve almost got it.” You bit your lip in concentration as you aimed for the second fighter. But right as you pressed fire, so did they. Your eyes widened as you quickly swerved. Luckily, the blast didn’t hit the front of the starfighter, or else you’d be good as dead right now. Unluckily, you gasped in horror as your ship began plummeting, realizing they had hit your engine. 

You turned your head back, praying that this wasn’t in vain. You let out a breath, realizing Snap was now free and the other TIE was demolished, thanks to your aim. If you’re going to go down, at least you brought two First Order fighters with you. 

As your X-wing came closer and closer to the ground, you screwed your eyes shut. Against your will, you remembered that at least your last conversation with him had been a good one. Your heart broke, realizing he’d probably find a way to blame himself for this, forever. That you’d never get married, never have the chance to settle down after the war ends. That you’d never again feel his lips against yours, never again experience the warmth of his arms or the comfort of his embrace. How could life work like this, how could it simply-

Your thoughts were cut off as your starfighter crashed to the ground, leaving you in darkness. 

-------

“What do you mean, their starfighter went down?!”

Leia sighed, subtly but firmly gesturing for everyone else to clear the briefing room. “Blue Squadron’s supply run didn’t go as planned. There were first order TIE fighters waiting for them. I’m not sure of the specifics, just that Commander L/N’s X-wing’s communication systems went out. Snap said Y/N went down saving him and when he rushed back to their crashed X-wing, they were breathing, but unconscious and bleeding.” 

Her eyes softened as she saw Poe’s heartbroken expression. “I’m sorry, Poe. I know you must be feeling helpless right now. But there is no reason to assume the worst, at least not yet.”

Poe swallowed hard, the tears making his throat heavy. “I’m-” His voice broke, the pain evident. “I’m gonna go wait at the hangar bay. They’ll make it home.” 

Leia just nodded, not having the heart to tell him to try to prepare himself for the worst. 

-------

When you woke up, you were in Snap’s X-wing, leaning against the wall in the small space. You groaned when you moved your hand to your head. Yup, you were definitely bleeding. 

“Where are we?” You croaked out. 

Snap’s head shot over to you. “Oh thank the Maker, you’re awake! We’re almost back at the base. Just sit still, okay?”

You nodded, already feeling a bit groggy.

“Y/N?!” 

You gave an annoyed hum in response.

“Come on, Y/N, don’t fall asleep. Hold on a little longer.” 

You nodded, fighting against every instinct you had to stay conscious. 

“Kriff, okay. Talk to me, okay?”

“About what?” Your mouth felt like sandpaper and your head was heavy. Even as you leaned it against the wall, you felt dizzy, like you’d tip over at any second. 

“Dameron. Tell me about Dameron, okay?”

Your lips unconsciously curled into a soft smile. And then your eyes shot open as you tried to physically shake the dizziness from your body. “The X-wing!”

“What?!”

“My, no, his X-wing! Poe’s, his- he’s gonna be so upset, kriff!” 

“What are you going on about?”

“Poe, he let me use his X-wing and it kriffing crashed and-” You trailed off, running a hand through your hair and wincing as the movement aggravated your injured head. 

“Y/N, calm down, okay? He’ll be fine, he’s not gonna care.”

You nodded, eyes filling with guilty tears as Snap finally pulled up to the Resistance Base. Home. As the X-wing opened, Snap helped haul you up as Poe sprinted over to you. 

“Y/N!” He called, hands coming to hold either side of your face. He quickly put one of your arms around his shoulders as his wound around your waist, holding your weight against him.

“I’m sorry, I’m so-” You hiccupped, tears leaking from your eyes. 

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s alright. Let’s just get you back to our room, yeah?” 

You shook your head, placing a hand on his chest to stop him. He looked into your eyes and his concern compounded, no idea why you were so distraught. 

“I crashed your X-wing.” You said, head hung in shame. 

Poe was now just as confused as he was concerned. “I… I know, sweetheart. But you’re safe now, I’ve got you. Just a little more walking and then I can clean you up.” 

“No! I, you don’t understand! Poe, it’s not just scratched up, it’s ruined. We had to leave it, it’s gone and it’s my fault and I’m so, so sorry.”

He just shook his head, still shocked that you thought he was upset about that. “Y/N, I know. But I’m not worried about that, I’m worried about you. Now would you please let me get you back to our room?” 

You nodded but he didn’t miss how the guilt refused to leave your gaze. When you finally got inside, he led you over to the bed and got you to sit down. 

“I’m fine, seriously.” 

Poe quirked his eyebrow. “You’re bleeding from the head.” 

He walked quickly into the refresher, coming back with the medkit you’ve used on him millions of times before. As he worked on disinfecting the cut on your head, you bunched your fingers in the bedsheets, distracting yourself from the pain of the gash. Noticing, he muttered a quick apology, taking a break to stroke his thumb across your cheekbone. Finally, he finished stitching the cut and gently placed a bandage over the area, smoothing out the edges. 

When he looked up, he saw you lost in your own mind. “Come on, baby, talk to me.” 

“You just… you loved that ship and you trusted me with it and you’d had it for so long and I can’t believe I wrecked it.” 

Poe sighed, wishing there was something he could do to convince you that everything was alright. 

“Sweetheart, it’s a kriffing X-wing. Why are you so worked up about it?” His voice was soft and free of judgment. 

“I just feel like I let you down.” 

“Hey,” He said, taking your hands in his. “You did nothing of the sort. I promise, I’m not upset, okay? I’m just glad you made it home to me.” 

You looked up at him. “I’ll always come home to you.” 

You scooted over and gestured to the bed, a silent invitation. Poe smiled at you and took a second to take off his boots and jacket before climbing in beside you. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders, careful not to hit your head while doing so. You leaned into him, your face resting comfortably in the crook of his neck as you breathed in his scent. He pulled back for a second, just to grab the covers and move them so they were all around you and up to your chin, just as you liked. 

Under the blankets, you moved your hand so it was resting on his heart. You liked doing so, feeling the steady beating of it after a long mission. Poe was used to it by now and simply placed one of his hands atop yours, his thumb rubbing up and down. 

“And you know it’s not your fault, right?” He said, breaking the silence 

“Poe, I was literally the one that crashed it.” You reasoned, lifting your head up to look at him. 

“They shot you down as you took out two TIE fighters! No one could have gotten out of that.” 

“But you had so many memories attached to that X-wing-”

“-And we’ll make new ones.” He finished. 

You sighed and nodded, a slow smile creeping onto your face that let Poe know that you at least somewhat believed his words. Inwardly, he cheered, quite proud of himself for getting through to you. Outwardly, he just tucked you further into his embrace and relished in the feeling of you safe, home, and in his arms.

----

tagging people on my permanent taglist + peoples who wanted a tag/might be interested? if i wrongly guessed you’d be interested please feel free to ignore sfklsj!!

@saltybreaddream @buckysbeloved @lolquarth @sodaoverstars @artiza-n @poestardust @beskar-tano @starwarsflowers @sunsetkenobi @90steaology @marvelinsanity @dracowars @collywobbl @dameronology​ @marvel-ousnesss​

also: i added poe to my taglist and if you would like to be added to those tags, the link to join my taglist is in my pinned! if you’ve already joined my taglist, you can just fill it out again in full or just check poe’s name and either way i’ll know because the last question on the form lets me know if you’re new to the taglist or simply editing your previous answer :)

also i sent this fic to the queue because i have never been more scared to post something

[toraashi]

[ red string of fate ]

akaashi keiji x gn!reader

[ warnings/genre ]

fluff, brief mentions of alcohol, language

[ word count ]

1,665 words

Akaashi found himself zoning out far too much lately. During work, during time with friends, over dinner, and now on his second date this week. Stirring his food around with his chopsticks, he spun his noodles, lifting them to his mouth, and making eye contact with his date across the table as he did so. Through the haze of his thick lashes, he watched as they prattled on about some mindless work topic, their free hand waving aimlessly while the other wrapped around a glass of wine. 

He desperately tried not to, but once again, his mind trailed off, sapphire hues flicking to the dainty red knot tied around his pointer finger, following the thread as it trailed in front of him before vanishing in the distance. Akaashi, like many others, had all but given up on this fantasy. Finding your soulmate. The one for you. It was an exciting concept as a teenager, knowing that there was one person in the world that the universe assigned as yours, someone unique and entirely catered to you and your soul. Alas, as time drew on, reality set in. True, the concept was exciting, but there were several billion existing on this Earth, and many times people's strings would lead them to a cemetery. People often never found their soulmates regardless, and Akaashi had heard of people avoiding them. It was a confusing system, all but a naive dream, and most learned to maneuver through life disregarding it. After years of high school revelation and the words of others insisting he just ignore it, he'd finally began branching out, hoping to find peace with another.

Wasn't it disheartening to commit to someone knowing that there'd always be someone better out there, though? He bit his inner cheek in thought, pushing his glasses up his face as the person seated before him sighed.

“Akaashi-san, are you even listening?” Chin raising, he glanced at them, lips curling into an apologetic smile. They cupped their cheek with their hand, eyes reprimanding and bitter. "Your head's always in the clouds, Akaashi-san. It's infuriating." He fought the urge to roll his eyes. Level-headedness was a trait he took pride in; clearly, this person wasn't observing him like he was them. 

"I was listening. It's been a long day at work. I'm sorry I seem distracted." Repressing the distaste in his tone, he searched their eyes for relent, waiting for them to continue their rant. The person across the table groaned loudly, sliding a hand through their hair before moseying it across the table, knuckles brushing up against his. Akaashi's entire body grew stiff at the contact, discomfort swelling his being as they followed the path up his arm to his face, eyes tender and reluctant.

"Akaashi-san, I really like you," Was this supposed to feel so wrong? He'd been on a few dates with this person, and maybe they'd been more invested than he noticed, but every dinner felt empty and meaningless to him. Gemstone eyes fluttering closed, he let an exhalation drop from his pursed lips, fingers withdrawing. 

"I don't feel the same. Perhaps we shouldn't reschedule this date." Akaashi cushioned his words with deliberate sympathy, features softening while their's hardened. Guilt stung like a dagger in the back, and in an instant, he was attempting damage control. "I'm sorry-" 

"Shut the fuck up. You've been leading me on this whole time." Flinching at their biting words, he averted his gaze to his food, eyebrows furrowing with annoyance. 

"We're just not compatible." A huff sounded above him paired with a jingle of keys. He made no argument as they slid from the ornate chair, fingers digging into their waist as they examined him with hostility.

"I hope you find what you're looking for, but don't bother contacting me again." Grimacing, the boy didn't look as his former date stormed from the restaurant, leaving him with both the bill and an empty seat. Dating was much too complicated, he decided. Was it really worth the heartache for something he wasn't particularly invested in? Running a straggled hand through the inky waves on his scalp, he reached for his phone and unlocked it. 

11:30pm. 

He worked early the following day. Perhaps his date walking out on him was for the best. 

The scarlet thread tied neatly around his finger seemed to glow beneath the flaxen lights of the Italian rooftop restaurant, and he sighed for the millionth time that night, flagging the waiter down for the check.

Soulmates. 

Maybe Akaashi was indeed just a romantic at heart, a raging eclectic who refused to settle for anything below the best. He'd always viewed himself as level-headed, but after countless dates initiated by bored co-workers, he never felt the pull he longed for in a partner. 

A pull. 

Akaashi raised his hand peculiarly, noticing as the thread grew taut, tugging in a specific direction. A skipped heartbeat and his eyes followed the string over the ledge of the second floor, through the myriad of cars parked impatiently at the stoplight and to a figure across the way. They held their hand up suspiciously, staring at a glittering amber knot. 

Akaashi rose abruptly, nearly knocking his table over before quickly rifling through the cash in his wallet, splaying a debatable amount on the white tablecloth before grabbing his coat and pacing briskly through the restaurant. The stairs felt eons-long, his feet slapping against the metal, glasses fogging with the intensity of his breaths, but he could hardly care. Every moment in his life led up to this one. Pushing through the line of people, he exited the building, the cool night air biting his cheeks and painting them a rosy red. The tug of his hand directed him, almost as desperate as he to meet this mystery person. From this distance, he could tell they were bundled in a thick shadow-colored jacket in an attempt to fight the cold and the color of their shoe as they stepped into a taxi- 

"Wait!" He shouted over the traffic, jogging in between cars, spouting apologies left and right between incessant honks, the drivers swerving to avoid his form. "Wait! Sorry, one second." His fumbling through lanes of cars seemed to catch the person's attention, and they instantly perked up, features flooded with panic and concern. They leaned to the cab driver as his foot met the pavement once more, holding a lone finger, a plea on their lips. Goosebumps littered his skin as he turned to them, shivering in his navy turtleneck. Now that he was here, he was unsure of what to say. He'd been so eager to stop them, he hadn't thought of the consequences of his impulsive choice. What if they didn't want to meet him? What if they were dating already? A flurry of questions and insecurities pelted his mind in milliseconds; he barely caught the playful quirk of their lips tainted by a breath of exhaustion. 

"Can I help you? My cab can't wait all night." Refocusing, he peered into the dripping hues of their eyes, watching as the color glimmered beneath nearby shop lights. Their hair was dusted with snowflakes that he longed to brush away. He felt a pull towards them, something he'd been missing in dates for his entire life. "Hello? Stranger?"

"Sorry," He chuckled, embarrassment leaking from his words. "I saw you from the restaurant roof across the street, and I think you're my soulmate." God, that was so embarrassing to say, and he wrapped his arms around himself in consequence, hiding from both the cold and their reaction. They stared at him with the widest eyes he'd ever encountered, cheeks tickling with a blush before they held up their hand, palm facing towards his shivering form. 

"Can you see my string?" His heart nearly thumped from his chest as he revealed his own, nodding slowly and bringing it towards theirs. An inch filled with longing and tension separated the pair's fingertips, and his breath hitched when they pressed their palm to his, smiling tenderly. "Is this okay? I can't explain it, but I feel a pull to you already? Is that weird?" A laugh rumbled in his throat, and he was shaking his head vigorously.

"No. I feel the same." Relief billowed from their lungs, and their fingers collapsed in the spaces of his. 

"Aren't you cold?" They whispered, peeking up at him through thick lashes, a reserved timidness radiating from their form. He hummed, lifting their hands once more, pressing a feather-light, almost polite kiss to the back. 

"I'm not." And he wasn't. In their presence, he felt warm despite it all. A few shy glances later and the cab driver interrupted the moment.

"Oi! Am I taking you or not?" Disappointment fluttered through their features at the abrasive words of the chauffeur, and they removed their hand from his. Lips parting to break the news, he moved first, spluttering words without consent from his brain. 

"I can take you home. If you're comfortable, of course." Sunshine shot through them like lightning at his suggestion, and they pulled on the sleeves of their jacket, grinning giddily. 

"Are you sure? You barely know me." He'd never been more sure of anything in his life, but he went light on the dramatics, eager to please and impress.

"Like I said, if you're comfortable." Casting him a sparkling smile, they nodded eagerly, turning to the driver and sending him away. 

"All right, Stranger, lead the way." They chortled, skipping to his side. Akaashi returned the enthusiasm, offering his hand. Taking it with pleasure, his soulmate hummed, allowing him to lead the way. Guiding them through throngs of people towards his car, he glanced back tenderly. 

“My name’s Akaashi Keiji.” The dreamy look that swam through their eyes had him swooning. 

"That's a lovely name." They cooed, squeezing his hand before speaking their own.

Akaashi could get used to this.