#alex is shitposting

[pygmeys]

Argentumblr hice esto para ustedes..,,. ..

[silverstoneddd]

bahrain gp 2024 moodboard

[sentientsky]

why do they do this. every time !!!!

[louhinks]

final draft except all of the manuscript notes are in pink glitter gel pen now instead

[multiseb21]

F1 drivers as random tweets that made me laugh this month🫡 (part 1)

[almightaylor]

RWRB TEXT POSTS: PART 16

[three-penguins-in-a-trench-coat]

How the Villagers of Pelican Town would react to The Farmer being, well, the Farmer

The Farmer does too much bullshit to go unnoticed by the Villagers of Pelican Town.

The motherfucking trash looting. Gus goes outside to clear away the night's trash, and the Farmer is squatting on the ground by it, scoffing down the salad he threw out the night before. There are hints of mold on the greens, and they're scraping bits of it off with their fingernails, before scoffing it in their mouth. The Farmer looks Gus square in the eye, and starts eating the plate.

Alex likes working out, and he notices the Farmer is always wearing a backpack. He asks what's in it, "oh you know, just a bit of this, a bit of that." He asks to pick it up and can't even lift pick it up off the ground like it's Thor's fucking hammer or some shit. The Farmer opens it to reveal the inside is larger than Mary fukin Poppin's bag of nightmares. Along with several dangerously sharp farming utensils, there's more food than the whole town would eat in a week, several live fish and enough rocks to level the valley.

Lewis, who spends most of his day walking through the town, often wonders how the Farmer can appear from their farm, walk to the beach, and the reappear from the farm ten minutes later... once more walking to the beach. They considered following the farmer, but decided against it. Best not to disturb those armed with glowing medieval weaponry.

Of everyone in Pelican Town, Jas is the most aware of what shenanigans happen on the farm.

[arkomaly]

Alex Kralie would get so fucking angry at Among Us honestly

[babiebom]

bachelors and their weird kinks/turn ons perhaps 👀

A/N: it took a LOT for me to find weird things that arent gross(literally shit or dead people sorry if you’re into these) and even then I don’t even think these are weird but there’s only so many sites that I can go on to find weird kinks or even kinks in general. Fun fact there’s a kink for watching people fall down the stairs!! Keep in mind I’m talking about these fetishes and kinks from my own memory from looking them up lmao.

Tw:nsfw like all of it, cursing etc let me know if I should tag anything else!!

Bc: at least 4 for each? One for what the kink is and one for the explanation?

Stardew Valley Masterlist

Sebastian

Dacryphilia the kink or fetish for watching or causing someone to cry(positive or negative). A kink for tears if you will

I don’t know if I’ve talked about this before (I might’ve?) but dude has a major crying kink. Like he needs to make you cry while having sex. In this instance it’s a good crying. Like from how good his dick feels inside you. How good it feels when he moves, when he touches you. It’s like overstimulation but the crying is the main thing he wants.

Somnophilia the kink or fetish for having sex with someone while they’re asleep.

AGAIN this is all consensual but he likes the way you look when you’re asleep. You’re fully content and relaxed, no troubles or worries. He just wants to make you feel even better to send you to a new level of paradise. And the way that you are free in your reactions instead of holding everything back. All of your sounds and the way you move…it just gets him off in a different way.

Sam

Katoptronophilia the kink or fetish for watching yourself or others have sex in a mirror

I think this kink more so has to do with his partner. I do think he would get off with watching you or him fucking you in a mirror. Like you both can see your own faces and it’s just hot how you can see how good he’s making you feel and the other way around. It’s like his recordings kink but in real time.

Claustrophilia the kink or fetish for tight spaces literally the opposite of claustrophobia

I think he would like the whole stuck in a small closet together thing or the whole (if you’ve seen kdramas bc this is the only time I’ve seen it) hiding from someone in a tight space and being forced to be close or touching.

Shane

Shibari the fetish or kink of Japanese bondage. It’s more artistic than regular bondage and can sometimes be nonsexual(meaning it can just be for the act of being tied/tying someone up)

I do think Shane might have a artistic side to him, he loves his blue chickens and even though he hasn’t particularly shown that he likes art I think he’d appreciate this form. Like yeah it has bdsm tones and he likes that, but he likes the time taken to tie you up, the time it takes to make the ropes look pretty on you. It gets the both of you riled up so the sex might be more passionate.

Electrostimulation the fetish or kink to being stimulated or stimulating someone with electricity

Oh dude is definitely a sadomasochist. He wants to shock you, he wants to be shocked (partially because he wants to feel something other than mental and emotional pain). It’s never so much that it hurts too much but it’s a little stinging sensation that he can’t get enough of.

Harvey

Quirofilia the kink or fetish for hands, but well taken care of/pretty hands

Oh I think Harvey HAS to take of his hands. As a doctor I think he would be happy if someone complemented how soft his hands were or how clean they looked. And on the other hand(heheheh) he would appreciate how nice your hands look, how soft they feel, how good they feel when touching him.

Breeding/Pregnancy the kink or fetish for pregnant people or getting someone pregnant. It has nothing to do with the child itself but the person carrying the child.

NGL I think once you two come to an agreement about pregnancy(in this case you agree to start trying for kids) Harvey is absolutely going to go batshit insane with this new development. Before he would’ve never said that this is something he’s into but once you two agree he’s so pumped up and actually starts talking dirty if he didn’t before. It’s crazy how different he is during this time.

Alex

Anasteemaphilia the kink or fetish for extreme size differences so either a giant or a dwarf(I hope this word isn’t offensive it’s what the website used)

Dude would NEVER reveal this but actually would love a giant girlfriend. I think because of the lowkey misogynistic views he has he would like a bigger woman and a smaller man. He would LOVE lady dimitrescu from resident evil. Like bffr.

Food Play the kink or fetish of involving food during intercourse so either eating it off each other or involving it in some way

Oh absolutely would love to eat food off of you and would want you to lick stuff off of him. Like whipped cream and chocolate syrup are MUSTS if you’re having a particularly long night. He thinks it’s so erotic to eat and consume stuff off of each other that don’t really have anything to do with sex.

Elliott

Psellismophilia the kink or fetish for stuttering

One of the weird ones I found. I think he would think it’s cute and if you do have a stutter or happen to stutter when you’re nervous he’s going to have such a confidence booster because of it. Like YES keep stumbling over your words and stuttering it actually is cute to him and he feels like he’s in a book or a movie or something.

Podophilia the kink or fetish for feet

I think this one is obvious? I think he’d prefer beautiful people and that includes feet. In a lot of erotic movies and books and even in romance books feet have some sort of importance to them. Whether it’s used to dominate someone or to pleasure someone he likes beautiful feet. He wants you to step on him(not in a rough way) and tbh I could see him wanting to recreate the scene in that one tarentino(is this his name) movie where he casts himself in the role that drinks I think alcohol from that woman’s food after it runs down her leg.

[musical-shit-show]

i was trying to put the adam + lucifer and vox + alastor dynamics into words and this just hit me like a ton of bricks

[pygmeys]

if i have to listen to one more yanqui saying that their capitalistic dictatorship is better than anyone else for being "more woke" i stg

[solazu1]

I’m on a roll babeyyyy (starts hysterically crying)

bonus drawing with hoody instead of Brian from W.I.P.

[lectercunt]

[sentientsky]

i haven’t seen a single episode of x-files in its entirety. but this is canon because i said so. i’m chris carter btw xoxo

[shoecrabs]

no context riordanverse spoilers: