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satansapostle6 · 10 months

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folie à deux

Sometimes poison is sweet.

Selina Romanov and Draco Malfoy met when they were only eleven years old. The two of them have always shared an intense bond, always having gravitated towards one another. But the question still remains, as the years pass by, is their connection one of passion, or delusion?

Warnings: Contains Mature Themes/Language, Themes Such As Sexual Content, Violence, Abuse, Sexual Assault, Eating Disorders

One.

Two Years Ago

Eleven year-old Selina Romanov sat alone in a train compartment headed for her new school. The Romanov family was held in very high regard in the wizarding world, and yet, she felt she had no friends in that world, or any world she belonged to, for that matter. She sat alone in a train compartment full of sweets she'd bought, hoping at least one other person might join. Selina's grandmother had given her plenty of money in her journey to Hogwarts School in Scotland, one of the only good things she'd ever gotten from her. Many other children passed by over the long train ride aboard the Hogwarts Express, but none had come to sit down in her compartment as the hours passed. After little over two hours had gone by, a boy had been walking outside of her compartment and almost passed it, before walking backward, opening the door.

"Oi. Is that cherry?" he inquired, pointing at the box of candies she was eating from.

"Yeah, it is," she nodded quietly.

"Give me some, then," the blond-haired boy demanded, extending his hand.

"That's a funny way of asking," Selina remarked, tipping the box over and dropping a few candies into his hand.

He frowned at her resentfully, taking the candies and popping a couple of them into his mouth. He begrudgingly took a seat across from her, looking around at the other treats that she had gotten from the trolley, as well as from Diagon Alley a few days prior.

"You know, Chocolate Frogs are alright, I suppose, but these will always be my favorite," he said confidently, still chewing.

"Yeah. Cherry's one of my favorite flavors. They didn't have strawberry, though," Selina thought.

"Eh, strawberry's alright," the boy with pale blond hair and blue eyes conceded, "But cherry is simply superior."

They sat in silence as Selina wished she could go back to being alone, looking out the window almost melancholically, drowning everything out in her head with music. Selina Romanov always wished she had friends until she remembered what it was actually like to have friends.

"Say, what's your name?" the young boy, most likely another Hogwarts first year, asked, somehow still sounding rude. "I know you, from some of my parents' parties, and stuff. I don't think I've seen you at one in years, though."

"Selina."

"Selina what?" he demanded impatiently.

"Selina Romanov," she responded dryly.

He nodded quickly. "A Romanov. Now that's a respectable enough family," he determined with an obvious haughtiness.

She just smiled, knowing that upon her mother's death and her father's life sentence to Azkaban prison, she had inherited an entire vault of riches, jewels, and other heirlooms that reached two full floors of twenty feet each.

"My name's Draco Malfoy," he remarked, holding for applause, no doubt. "I knew you looked familiar. Your parents knew my parents. I remember seeing you at the parties, and such from before."

"Nice to meet you, I suppose, Draco," she remarked, underwhelming him with her amount of enthusiasm.

"So. What House do you think you'll be sorted into?" he questioned curiously. "I'm going to be a Slytherin. No one on either side of my family's ever been anything else."

"I can't say for sure. Not all of my family's studied at Hogwarts. Most of the men on my father's side went to Durmstrang," Selina explained. "But the ones that didn't went here. They were all Slytherins, I think."

"Oh, I almost went there," Draco nodded nonchalantly. "But, my mum said no. She and my father both went to Hogwarts."

"My parents went to Hogwarts, too. Both of them were Slytherins, and a lot of my mum's family were Slytherins. She did have a few Ravenclaws on her side, though. I'll most likely be one of those two," she thought. "I'm guessing Slytherin, but I suppose Ravenclaw wouldn't be too surprising."

"Those are the only two houses worth a damn," Draco Malfoy scoffed wryly.

Selina just rolled her eyes as she looked out the window, unimpressed by Draco's keen memorization of his parents' hot takes.

"I hope we're in Slytherin together," he carried on. "I just came from a car with a few of the others who are going to be in Slytherin. They're easily impressed. Not very bright, either."

Selina did her best to ignore the irony.

"I hope we're in Slytherin together, too," she remarked.

Strangely enough, she felt that she hadn't been telling a complete lie when she had said so.

"Do you think you'll make it into Slytherin?" Draco asked, not paying much mind to tact.

"I definitely can. My uncle says that I ought to be in Slytherin, based on my personality and such," she replied.

"Do you live with him?" he asked, still indulging himself through her candy. "I mean, your father's in prison for murdering your mum, so I expect you can't be living with either of them. Especially since your mum isn't even living."

This comment made her chuckle, despite its socially and generally inappropriate tone.

"I live with my grandmother," she answered humorously, "But she's not very pleasant, so I don't really count her opinion on this subject, or any other, for that matter."

"Well, that's just hilarious," Draco scoffed, "All these years, I've been wishing my parents were dead just so I could have all the money, and none of the anger, or the rules, and yours practically are, and you're still miserable!"

Selina genuinely smiled. "Yeah. Something like that."

Although just about anyone else would've found Draco incredibly annoying and offensive, the things that he said were more entertaining to her than stress inducing. He was practically a free source of entertainment.

"Is it true what they say about you?" he asked, finally making eye contact as well as not eating candy.

"Which part?" she wondered. "There's kind of a lot, you know. According to some, my father is a vampire. According to others, my mother was part Veela."

She had a sense already of what he was going to ask, but she wasn't certain.

"No, not that," he shook his head dismissively. "You know."

"No, actually, I don't."

"The part where they say you saw your father murder your mum," Draco replied nonchalantly.

She smiled, knowing she'd been right.

"Yeah. I did, actually."

"Oh."

To her surprise, Draco's casual expression slowly turned to one of sadness and disgust.

"Yeah. I was six. Remember it clear as day. I can tell you all about it, if you like," Selina Romanov offered with a disturbingly subtle smile.

"No. That's—that's okay," he murmured, sitting in the seat quietly for a moment.

Despite the sad awkwardness that lasted a few minutes, Draco Malfoy never left the train compartment.

*****

"Selina Romanov!"

Selina sat before her entire school as she began her first year of Hogwarts, waiting patiently as Professor McGonagall carefully placed the Sorting Hat on her head.

"Mmm, a Romanov, eh?" the old hat recognized as it sat on her head. "Ambitious, cunning, powerful... But also, intelligent, sharp, thoughtful... Oh, I've made my decision. Slytherin!"

Everyone in the Great Hall exploded into applause, but the Slytherin table cheered especially loudly. The Sorting Hat was removed from Selina's head as she promptly left the platform to take a seat at the appropriate table, searching for someone to sit next to. As she walked by, many of the Slytherins waved her over, hoping to gain one of the Romanovs as a friend. One of the students hopeful to gain Selina Romanov as a potential friend was a small, dark-haired girl who Selina had seen pushing one of the Hufflepuff girls on the train in the line for sweets. Not particularly charmed by her desperate smile as she tried to wave her over to sit beside her, Selina looked down at who she would eventually discover was Pansy Parkinson as she passed, the girl who she had seen at a few of her parents' social engagements when she was younger. Before Selina could come to her own conclusion, she was stopped as Draco Malfoy, the dude blond boy she'd met on the train stood in front of her.

"Selina Romanov, right?" he asked her. "We met on the train? Our parents used to know each other."

This time, he was much more cordial and formal.

"Yeah," Selina nodded, looking at him with skepticism.

"These are my friends. Crabbe, and Goyle."

"Yeah, I think I remember them from the parties," she nodded, her face not particularly emotive.

"Come sit with us," he invited her with a wide grin, "Next to me. Our parents all know each other, and look out for one another. We could do the same," he offered, his voice dripping with Machiavellianism.

"I'm not sure I follow," she replied carefully.

This was a lie. She understood exactly what he was suggesting, and was simply waiting for him to clearly lay out the terms of the arrangement.

"You're a Romanov. And, you made it into Slytherin. I saw you hex that Gryffindor boy who stepped on your shoes. I'm guessing you'd be pretty good at magic," he assumed.

"And if I am?"

"Well, I'd like to have a friend like that," he explained. "You see, these two oafs here... they're alright as muscle, but to them, wands are practically just glorified backscratchers. I need someone who's got a few hexes up their sleeve," he said thoughtfully.

"So what, you just need someone to do your dirty work for you?" Selina surmised. "For nothing in return?"

"I didn't say that," he promised her hastily.

"Then, what?" she asked. "What would you have to offer someone who's a good enough friend to cast the occasional hex?"

"You said on the train you liked Quidditch," he said plainly. "What if I told you my father can get tickets anytime he wants? Or, that he could ensure my spot on the team in the next two years, and could probably find room for someone else, if he wanted?"

Selina considered the implications of this proposal of friendship, carefully weighing the pros and cons. She knew she needed no one's help succeeding, but she also knew it certainly wouldn't hurt to make a friend with some influence. She was always looking for a way to ascend to the next level, and she knew with friends like Malfoy and his little henchmen, she could do just that.

"Come sit with us," Draco Malfoy said again. "I think we could be very good friends," he said persuasively, offering his hand for her to shake.

Selina Romanov smiled, shaking his hand. "Nice to see you again, friend."

Draco grinned, nodding his approval as he crudely snapped his fingers, motioning for Goyle to scoot over as if he were a dog. Soon enough, Selina would learn she could actually become very good friends with the likes of Malfoy and his posse. She would soon meet her best friend, Amana Tesfaye, as well as Elspeth Laurier. She didn't know it yet, but the people that she met in Slytherin would soon become like her only family, for better or worse.

Two Years Later

Most at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry would've assumed that Draco Malfoy, or perhaps Pansy Parkinson, was the meanest person in school. Most people would have been wrong. Although she rarely ever felt the need to make public displays of arrogant and cruel behavior, Selina Romanov was much more evolved in her own concept of power and intimidation than others. She could be just as domineering as Draco, or just as mean-spirited as Pansy, although she rarely ever felt the need to be. Most who knew her considered her to be most levelheaded of all the 'popular' Slytherins who dominated the school, but few ever made the mistake of considering her to be mild-mannered, or even weak. The most notable difference between Selina and people like Draco was that, while Draco's cruelty was in his words and actions, Selina's cruelty shone through via her silence. Normally, it was Draco who would push the first-year students around, or threaten them with the Unforgivable Curses, but it was Selina who would either laugh at their misfortune, or say nothing at all as she watched. However, she definitely didn't entertain herself with the torture of weaker children as often or as obviously as the others. This commonality that she had with the other boys in Slytherin definitely opened many doors for her, allowing her a place in a friend group that was essentially considered the Hogwarts elite. Whether she liked it or not, to them, Selina was just another one of the boys.

She never failed to make an impression anywhere she went. She was aware of all of it, although she would sometimes elect to ignore the lasting impressions she made. Oftentimes, she didn't know what to expect from them. Selina didn't know that the smile she'd offered to a lonely eleven year-old Hufflepuff boy would lead to him waiting outside of her dorms every day for a week with flowers he'd picked outside. She also was horrified to find that a strange old wizard she'd met in Diagon Alley while shopping for her school books when she was eleven was so captivated by her that he violently offered her money for her shoes. Just about everyone who met Selina Romanov had an opinion of her. Her best friend, Amana Tesfaye, would've described her as a beautiful, kind soul. Another close friend of hers, Draco Malfoy, would've described her as a funny person and a shockingly talented Quidditch player, although he never would've said it to her face. Pansy Parkinson would've and had called her an attention whore before, and her close friend Daphne Greengrass would've referred to her as a stuck-up bitch. Many people disliked or even hated Selina, often for reasons that actually had nothing to do with her in reality, but of course, even more people liked her. Still, it was at times difficult for her to focus on this.

She didn't get along with many people. When she was six years old, her father Ilya Romanov had been famously sent to Azkaban Prison for murdering his wife and Selina's mother, leaving her in the care of her grandmother, who resented her. Needless to say, when Selina started her first year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, she hadn't expected to end up in one of the groups that everyone in their grade constantly talked about. Selina came from a particularly wealthy family with an ancient, all-magic lineage of Pureblood witches and wizards, which was an incredibly rare thing in the wizarding world. Both of her parents had come from Pureblood families that belonged to incredibly exclusive and tight-knit social circles. At almost all of the events she'd attended throughout her childhood, Selina had interacted with a lot of the same children close to her age over the years, many of which, she found out, also attended Hogwarts. Surprisingly to her, upon starting school at Hogwarts, Selina had actually ended up making friends with a few of them, particularly a boy named Draco Malfoy, one of the more popular boys at school, who became one of her best friends.

Although Selina was popular and had made many different friends and acquaintances, she still was a very unusual witch, with rather unusual powers. Selina Romanov came from two powerful and unique bloodlines, her father being descended from the famous Romanovs, and her mother being descended from the Bonheur family, a famous line of witches and wizards. The Romanovs, with Selina's father Ilya being no exception, were known amongst wizards for being exceptionally gifted in dueling, especially when it came to curses and other forms of Dark magic. Although Selina's mother's side of the family did not share this particular gift, they did in fact have other unique traits. The Morais bloodline had been cursed, with something unidentifiable. For some inexplicable reason, the Morais's had a strange connection to death. Many of them had been born with various diseases, with Selina's mother having been born with a metabolism so strong that it had almost killed her in her childhood. Others in the Morais family formed eerie connections with Dark creatures, such as Dementors, Nundus, or Horned Serpents. Many also strongly suspected that Selina's mother, Adeline, had been part Veela. The Veela were beautiful magical creatures with pale skin and golden hair so light it was almost white, capable of charming and seducing humans.

Although it was in fact true, it was only rumored that Selina Romanov's grandmother, Dominique Morais, was a quarter Veela with beautiful blonde hair and sky blue eyes. Selina's mother Adeline, when she was alive, was a radiant and beautiful woman with golden brown hair and cool blue eyes, a trait which she had passed down to her daughter. Selina Alyona Romanov, much like her mother, had a rare sort of gift when it came to her occasional encounters with Dark creatures. When she had been alive, Adeline Romanov had many special abilities. Although she was an Animagus, and could turn into a graceful dove at will, which also happened to be the form that her Patronus took, also had a gift with Dark creatures that would've killed any other witch or wizard who dared to approach them. When she was younger, Adeline had practically made a pet out of a dangerous Horned Serpent she'd encountered on a trip to the far east. A gifted Parseltongue, Adeline had been able to speak to snakes in their language. When she'd encountered a Horned serpent on her travels after Hogwarts, she was able to use a part of its horn as the core to her wand. Adeline Romanov's wand was one of the most precious heirlooms that her daughter had inherited after her death. Although she was unable to use it, even Selina recognized that the wand was a precious heirloom. Her mother's wand had been exceptionally powerful and intimidating to any who were aware of it.

The wand that had belonged to Adeline Romanov had been twelve inches long, made from ebony with a Horned Serpent horn core. Although Selina hadn't inherited her mother's gift for Parseltongue, or the ability to use her wand, she had inherited her mother's talent for complex magic. Little over half a year ago, at only thirteen years old, Selina had used her mother's diaries to successfully perform the Animagus ritual. She had, as a very young witch, completed the complex ritual and drank the potion that allowed her to become an animal at will. Upon completing the ritual, Selina had revealed her Animagus form to be a raven, which felt like a faint connection to her mother. Selina's powers were both potent and unusual, something she had in common with both of her parents. Like her father, Selina Romanov had joined the Slytherin Quidditch team at Hogwarts at a young age. She had first been chosen as a Chaser on the Slytherin team a year before during her second year, even earlier than Ilya Romanov who had become the team's Seeker during his third year at Hogwarts. In her first year of playing on the Slytherin Quidditch team, Selina had gotten the chance to show off her years of learning maneuvers from books her father had left behind in only one game, due to most Quidditch matches having been canceled after the deaths of multiple students. Selina had been selected as one of the team's Chasers during tryouts on her own merit, although her connection to Draco Malfoy, whose father had donated expensive Nimbus 2001's to the Slytherin team in order to secure his place on the team as Seeker.

She was an exceedingly talented Quidditch player, and would have enjoyed playing as Seeker on the Quidditch team, although after she had learned that her friend had his eyes on the position of Seeker, she realized that her efforts and strategy would be even more useful to the team as a Chaser. Selina and Draco Malfoy's friends were certainly jealous of the two of them as players on the Slytherin team, which often came out when they discussed Quidditch. A thirteen year-old Selina Romanov sat at the window seat of the train compartment on the way to Hogwarts, sighing as she watched the train pass by mountains and rivers. She was trying her best to tune out everything else that had been going on. Sitting next to her was Draco Malfoy, who had been engaging in a lively argument about something Quidditch-related with Vincent Crabbe and Gregory Goyle, who sat across from them in the car.

"No it wasn't, you twat! Goyle. You went to that match, right?!" Malfoy exclaimed.

"Yeah, it was a foul!"

"No, for fuck's sake, it wasn't!" Draco yelled, not getting the answer he wanted out of him. "Sel! You went to the game with us! Was it a foul, or not?" he demanded impatiently.

"Will you three just shut the fuck up already?" Selina scoffed. "I can't even hear myself read!"

"Who the hell reads a book on the train to school?" Draco argued.

"Someone who's actually going to become a Chaser this year," she replied smugly, shooting a look at Crabbe, who just stuck his tongue out in retaliation.

"Crabbe, a Chaser?" he laughed at the idea. "The only thing I've ever seen him chase after is a pumpkin pie."

Goyle laughed at the crude joke at Crabbe's expense, insulting him as he enjoyed it wholeheartedly.

"I wouldn't be so smug if I were you, Malfoy," Selina remarked. "The only reason I'm not going out for Seeker is because you want it more than I do."

"Like you could beat me," he sneered, very obviously overconfident in his abilities.

"I have. Multiple times," she reminded him, "Eight times, just this summer."

Draco shook his head at her dismissively, trying not to admit that she had, in fact, beat him at playing for the golden snitch many times before, and that she usually did. Selina Romanov was one of the youngest players to make Slytherin's Quidditch team in years, having been chosen as one of the team's Chasers last year at Hogwarts after her impressive tryouts. Draco Malfoy, although he had tried to hide it then, had been extremely jealous of her their first year at Hogwarts. He of course had made the Quidditch team the year before, as the Slytherin team's Seeker, allegedly after a substantial donation of brand new Nimbus 2001's for the entire team from his father. Selina, unlike Draco, had a greater sense of integrity when it came to her athletic abilities. If she hadn't earned something on her own, it wasn't nearly as satisfying of an accomplishment to her. She wanted to be the best, certainly, but usually only if she'd actually achieved it herself. But still, she was certainly grateful for the sleek black brooms gifted to the team by a vicariously ambitious Mr. Malfoy. Selina treasured her Nimbus 2001, believing strongly that, although a truly skilled player didn't need any fancy equipment in order to succeed, good equipment could certainly enhance one's game.

As the train ride to Hogwarts progressed, Selina watched for the Dementors that would be supposedly searching the train for Sirius Black, the murderer who had recently escaped from Azkaban Prison. Crabbe had eventually fallen asleep after an intense sugar crash, followed by Goyle who had nodded off beside him. Draco sat awake across from Selina, switching back and forth between fiddling with something he'd found in his bag and watching her read her Quidditch book. After being on the train for about an hour of so, Draco had grown restless and began watching Selina Romanov gently pet her cat as she read, affectionately scratching the animal lightly behind the ears. Selina's cat, an undeniably adorable Norwegian forest cat with brown fur so dark it almost appeared black, was sitting beside her quietly as she read. Bored, Malfoy stood and walked towards Selina's side of the train car which she shared with Goyle. He forcefully scooped up the animal only by its shoulders, prompting it to hiss rather loudly at him as he set the cat down on his lap. Selina looked up at him, frowning.

"Freya doesn't like that, you prick," she snapped.

"Oh, relax, she'll get over it!" Draco complained, forcing the cat back into his lap as he lazily pet her.

Not appreciating his brutish forcefulness, the cat hissed again before aggressively scratching his arm.

"Ow!" he hissed, sucking on the bleeding scratch on his arm as Freya the cat remained sitting in his lap.

"I told you," Selina muttered.

"For fuck's sake, Sel, that hurt! Why isn't she leaving?" he demanded, scowling down at Freya.

"Well, you've already gone and upset her! You might as well give her some attention," Selina remarked indifferently as she read.

He sighed with boredom, picking the cat up in his arms as he he held her close to him, petting her as he clicked his tongue quietly, as if speaking to her in their own little language. Freya eventually accepted Draco's presence, and purred against his body. He chuckled as she purred softly, scratching her nose with his index finger.

"Hello," he whispered to her, her head raised as she demanded more. "Hello there, you fluffy little thing."

Selina just shook her head at him as she read, knowing that her cat also enjoyed his company but hated it at the same time.

"Hi, little kitten," he said absentmindedly as he pet Freya. "Yes! You're a pretty little thing, aren't you?"

Setting her book down, Selina crossed her arms as she rested against the wall, wishing that she had a blanket.

"How old is she, again?" Draco asked her considerately.

"She's about five. Fairly young, for a cat. Got her when she was a kitten."

"I like her," he said obsessively, setting her down and allowing her to sleep on his lap. "Even if she scratches the hell out of me."

"Only because you go and annoy the hell out of her," she pointed out.

"I wish I had a cat," he thought. "I mean, I have Ares, but a pet I can actually play with would be nice."

"I'm sure Ares is big enough to have a nice game of catch with," she chuckled at the thought of Draco's giant eagle owl.

"It's not the same," he sighed. "I want a pet that's meant to be played with. Maybe a nice cat, or a big dog."

"You, with a big dog?" she chuckled. "Draco, I've seen you get scared of especially big mice."

"That doesn't count, they came at me!" he insisted, earning an amused smile from Selina Romanov.

He fished into his pockets for snacks, pulling out a small bag of sweets from his mother.

"Chocolate muffin?" he offered her one.

She nodded with a smile, taking one from him as she ate contently.

"Are these from that one bakery she took us to?" Selina asked curiously to pass the time.

Draco nodded. "They're the best. Not too sweet, not too bitter, either. I don't like chocolate that much, honestly. Too much and it gets really bitter."

"I'm not much of a chocolate fan," she agreed, "I just eat it when it's there."

"Are you and Pansy Parkinson friends?" he asked, changing the subject out of nowhere.

"Not particularly," she shrugged, "Why?"

"Have you heard what she's been saying about you?" he asked her. "And me."

"No," she scoffed, "Why would I care what she says?"

"You shouldn't, she's like a walking Babbling Curse," he said frankly.

"Why?" Selina asked, brows furrowed. "What's she been saying?"

"She's been saying you're dating Goyle," Draco stifled a heavy laugh, "And that we fancy each other," he spoke slowly.

"Oh really, is that all?" she asked in disbelief. "She could write a whole gossip column, that one."

"I'll say. Blaise says he heard from Tracey she's been blabbing to everyone all summer. Both of our names have been in those letters at least a few times," Draco remarked.

"Why? What else has she got to say about us?" she wondered.

She didn't see a reason as to why Pansy Parkinson would go to such great lengths to convince everyone that Selina and Draco were a couple, considering that everyone knew it was Pansy who really fancied him.

"I didn't pay attention to much of it. She did try to start a rumor that you killed your mum, though," he said with disdain. "And that you and Blaise are dating. He's not very happy about that one."

"Oh, I'm flattered," she rolled her eyes.

"No," he rolled his eyes at her, "It's not that Blaise doesn't think you're fit, I think he just hates Pansy," he assured her.

"Hmm, can't see why anyone would do that," Selina said.

"Yeah," he muttered, looking out the train window.

"Do you?" she raised an eyebrow.

Draco looked away from the window. "'Do I' what?" he snapped.

"Hate her?" she finished. "Or... is it something else?" she asked.

"What are you playing at?" Draco snapped, sitting back expectantly.

"Nothing," she laughed, amused by his disdain, "Nothing."

He didn't believe her for a moment as she failed to stifle her giggles.

"No, really! What are you getting at?" he cocked his head at her accusingly.

"I'm not getting at anything," she assured him in ridicule. "Relax."

He heaved a loud, pouty sigh as he continued to look out the window, thinking about his complaints about nothing in particular. He eventually relaxed in his seat, falling almost asleep underneath the blanket his mother had packed in his bag for him, looking out the window. The both of them had nearly drifted asleep, until a growing commotion spread about the train. Draco was the first to be woken by it, looking over at Selina as he heard noise. She noticed his concern, looking around.

"What is that?" he asked her, looking out the window and seeing shapes somewhere in the darkness. "What's out there?"

"I don't know," she responded tiredly, trying to fall back asleep. "I don't care."

"My father says the Ministry's allowed the Dementors to leave Azkaban to act as security at Hogwarts," he recalled, "Do you think that's what that is?"

"Probably, yeah," Selina replied indifferently. "Now go to sleep."

He sighed aloud as he failed to return to sleep. Draco sat up, completely awake, as Selina, Crabbe, and Goyle all peacefully rested throughout the train ride, at least for a short while. With Draco's unrest and constant shifting about, Selina had woken up shortly, feeling disoriented. It didn't take long for her to notice what it was that had caught Draco's attention. The flying, cloaked Dementors hadn't actually entered the car that she and Draco were riding in, but as she watched one of them pass, she saw the darkness looming over them for just a moment, and felt an indescribable sense of dread as she observed from a distance. As they passed through the train, Selina exchanged glances with Draco. While he didn't seem to fully share her sense of disturbance, he had also seemed mildly uncomfortable for a moment as everyone else hardly noticed the Dementors, and continued on as if nothing had happened. Although no one else seemed to understand the effect that the Dementors had on those who felt their presence, Selina had learned through Draco's relentless bullying that Harry Potter, the infamous survivor of an attack by none other than Lord Voldemort, had been so affected by the Dementors' presence that, for a little while, he had been knocked completely unconscious on the train.

"Those Dementors. They're fucking disgusting-looking," Draco muttered to Selina as they walked from the train station to the boats that went over the most to the Hogwarts castle.

"I don't think they should really be allowed at a school," she stated. "That can't be safe."

"Why, because little baby Potter's gone and collapsed?" he argued crassly. "Please. He'll he taking photos and signing autographs again in no time."

"You sure you don't wish you could be the one signing autographs and babies?" she grinned.

"What are you saying? Me? Jealous of that prat?" he gave a haughty, forced laugh from his chest. "It'd be like a snake watching a rat eat rubbish and getting jealous."

"Hey, I could give you a scar right now and make you famous," Selina teased, playfully pointing her wand at him.

Draco broke his facade of arrogance as he quickly reached for the wand, just as Selina pulled it away with quick reflexes, as he chased after her. He raced after her, reaching out as she easily alluded him, running circles around the other Slytherin students. Trapped in by the crowds of other students, Selina was completely boxed in as Draco scooped her up in his arms, lifting her up off the ground and she slapped him in return. He childishly ran off despite her protests, carrying her in front of him the same way he would a heavy box. Selina slapped him jokingly on the face as he dropped her, the two of them rushing off towards the boats.

"Alright, three to a boat!"

The school's groundskeeper called to help the first years as all of the students piled into the small boats. Selina and Draco looked around for a third person, hoping to find Blaise Zabini, or perhaps Crabbe or Goyle to join them as they climbed in. Instead, it just so happened to be Pansy Parkinson who had climbed with them into the wooden boat. Selina turned back to look at her, but before she could utter a single word, the boat had already pushed off from the docks, launching them on a painfully slow journey, with only Pansy, to the school castle.

"Oh. Parkinson," Draco nodded to her, as Selina glanced at him with wide eyes.

"Hi, Draco," she chuckled coyly, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. "How was your summer?"

"Oh, it was alright. We summered in Paris again.," he said to her haphazardly. "It was pretty boring."

"I got your letter," she blurted out eagerly. "It was really nice."

He smiled, nodding in silence as they exchanged awkward but polite looks.

"Did you see the Dementors on the train?" Pansy piped up hopefully.

"Yeah, we talked to Blaise, they went through the entire train," Selina Romanov spoke to avoid the awkward silence.

"I wasn't talking to you!" Pansy squealed impatiently, earning surprised expressions and eyebrow raises from both Selina and Draco.

She just sat there, her jaw dropping as a laugh of disbelief slipped out, her eyes widening with excitement as she barely resisted the temptation of slapping her right across the face. She stared back at Draco, who only shrugged at her with a particularly insufferable smirk on his face. At first, Pansy's constant snapping at Selina had been cute and charming, simply an adorable quirk, but eventually, Selina had stopped finding it cute. She was willing silent for the rest of the boat ride to Hogwarts, watching Pansy fawning over Draco the entire time, appealing to nothing but his ego the entire time. Selina could hardly wait for the boat to dock. She was more than eager to see the rest of her friends, including Jasper Carroll, who was not only one of her favorite people at Hogwarts, but anywhere.

"Sit next to me at dinner?" Pansy asked Draco hopefully.

"And catch which diseases?" Selina asked with a cold grin on her face, walking away as Draco followed her with a laugh, leaving Pansy alone at the docks.

Selina always got the last word. They continued on to the castle with Crabbe, Goyle, and Zabini, discussing the Hogwarts Quidditch teams, as well as various school gossip, much of which naturally included Harry Potter, the boy famous for having survived his parents' murder as an infant. Selina, even if she never participated much in the boys' childish behavior, occasionally took interest in listening to the cruel gossip and insults that they shared with one another. To her, it was fairly natural to let out a wry chuckle at some of their crude jokes, or give one of them a friendly smack in response. Although Selina Romanov was nowhere near as shameless as her friends when it came to the insults that easily transitioned into straightforward bullying, she was certainly just as ruthless, if not worse at times, whether or not she chose to openly exhibit it. Selina Romanov was genuinely a fair and even-tempered sort of person, even when it came to the likes of Harry Potter, who Draco and many of the others in Slytherin all relentlessly made an enemy of. Selina had hardly ever lashed out at others unprompted, mostly because she never deemed the potential consequences to be worth it, but just about everyone at Hogwarts knew that under her calm exterior, she was equally as capable of inflicting pain as Draco, or Crabbe and Goyle, or even Pansy Parkinson.

Pansy Parkinson was essentially a female version of Draco Malfoy, terrorizing the female population of Hogwarts with extremely personal humiliation and name-calling as well as threats of unspeakably horrible gossip as opposed to physical violence. Selina Romanov was more so the reasonable mother that the children went to the father instead of when she said no, with an additional mini skirt and pink lip gloss. In a way, Pansy's version of bullying was much worse than Draco's could ever be. Pansy put much more effort into her torture of others than Draco Malfoy ever did. While he would simply stab at them in the dark with meaningless insults and silly physical blows until he grew bored of them and abandoned the endeavor altogether, Pansy spent time on her pursuits, gathering leverage against her carefully picked targets and going for their very worst weaknesses until they could take it no longer. She was far worse than a bully, chipping away at the self esteem and very sanity of all the girls she decided that she hated at Hogwarts, for various reasons. However, most were smart enough to understand that Selina Romanov was far worse, or at least she could be, if she ever wanted to be. There were countless examples, little displays, in which Selina's potential outweighed Pansy's by far. There was the time Selina had knocked Angelina Johnson off of her broom the year before in the midst of a rather intense Quidditch match against Gryffindor, or the time she had stolen Fred Weasley's Beater's bat to hit the Quaffle away from him during a game.

There was also the time that she had called Millicent Bulstrode an 'interrupting cow' to her face for publicly calling Tracey Davis ugly during a conversation she and Selina had been having, or the time that she had gotten away with using the illegal growth hex on Marcus Belby's head, causing it to swell up to six times its normal size after he'd been boasting in the Great Hall by using a Confundus charm on a first-year, or the time that she cast a Flagrante curse on some Hufflepuff boy's wand when she noticed him trying to hex Draco behind his back, which resulted in his hand being severely burned after coming into contact with the wand. She never liked to seem hot-tempered or immature, but when the situation called for it, Selina Romanov was an expert at retaliation. She was indeed very formidable of an opponent when it came to magic, especially various forms of Dark magic, typically in the form of spells or even interacting with Dark creatures in the forest. It wasn't unusual for Selina to leave the Hogwarts castle and hide away in the Dark forest to find the thestrals, the black winged horses that could only be seen by those who have witnessed death. The Thestrals, which were often misunderstood as dangerous, were very gentle creatures that appreciated attention, seeing as many witches and wizards couldn't even see them.

It was true, Selina was an entirely uncommon witch with powers that seemed to have the potential to rival even her father's when he was her age. When Ilya Romanov attended Hogwarts as a young Slytherin, around the same as the Malfoys, who he had become fast friends with, he had a definite talent for advanced spells, especially those which could be used against his fellow students. Ilya Romanov, even in his early years, had been gifted with hexes and curses, especially with nonverbal magic that gave him the impactful advantage of catching his opponents off guard. Selina, just like her father, was undeniably talented and could easily accomplish much of the same magic that he could at her age, and much more. Ilya Romanov was, to this day, was immensely skilled at dueling, which Selina had to bear witness to the day that her mother died. She was skilled at magic, especially combative magic that required a sharp mind and quick reflexes, which also proved equally convenient when it came to her interactions with those like Pansy, who made the mistake of underestimating her as a rival.

Pansy might've been cunning, and her words might've been biting, but still, it was Selina who ultimate ended up walking away for dinner with Draco, Crabbe, Goyle, and Zabini, while she was left to return to her other friends. Pansy didn't understand the influence that Selina had. In her eyes, Selina could try half as hard as Pansy and still get twice as much out of people. Pansy Parkinson could hardly understand why Selina was practically silent most of the time, and usually only had the occasional eyebrow raise or sly sneer to offer, and yet all the boys, including Draco at times, always seemed to take her side. It seemed no matter what Pansy said or did, no matter what she had up her sleeve to tip the scales in her favor, everyone seemed to be more inclined to be swayed by what she would describe as her eerie good looks and silence disguised as poise. Pansy watched with a maddening envy as Selina walked with the boys, sandwiched between Blaise and Draco talking Ministry business that they'd heard about from family and read in the papers as they gestured colorfully and made cracks about Ministry employees and their various laughable qualities.

Selina sat at the welcoming feast with the boys, as she usually did. She sat beside Draco with her best friend, Amana Tesfaye, on her other side, across from Blaise, who reluctantly sat by Crabbe and Goyle. She has noticed her friend Jasper Carroll sitting far down the Slytherin table on the same side. Jasper smiled, his long, dark hair offsetting the friendly smile on his face. Selina had kindly waved back to him, the two of them chuckling at themselves as they momentarily ignored everyone sitting around them. After the students' first dinner of the year at Hogwarts, which had been initiated by a rather disturbing speech from the Headmaster regarding the Dementors guarding the school and watching out for Sirius Black, the Slytherins had all retreated to their common room, in the dungeons beneath the rest of the school, where Selina had accompanied the boys to the dormitory that they shared, sitting on the floor, talking and laughing together as they all shared the half bottle of Firewhisky that one of the boys who slept in another room had stolen from his parents. After a while, the others had all gone to sleep, leaving Draco and Selina sitting up without the bottle, trying not to wake them as they talked later and later into the night. Before either of them knew it, it had been hours since dinner, and Draco Malfoy sat around chortling uncontrollably, with the help of the small amount of Firewhisky he'd drank. Funny enough, Selina had drank more of the Firewhisky than he had, and was growing bored of indulging his childishness. He was currently leaned up against his bed, his hand supporting him on the ground.

"Careful," Selina spoke slowly, tiring of him as she helped prop him up with her hand, "You're going to fall over."

"I'm fine," he insisted, waving her away as he sat up.

"We should probably go to bed soon, we have to be up early for classes tomorrow," she patted his shoulder.

"Great, get in," Draco replied smugly, nodding at his bed.

Occasionally, Draco's arrogance would result in questionable behavior that, to one who wasn't accustomed to him, might perceive as flirting, or even genuine affection. Luckily, Selina knew how to avoid this sort of trap.

"Okay. I'm going to assume that's your own stupidity talking, with the help of the Firewhisky," she concluded, unamused.

She was starting to miss Jasper more and more as she continued spending time with Draco again.

"Oh, come on, we shared my bed during that thunderstorm our first year," he reminded her.

"Yes, after I told you I'd give you ten minutes because you were so scared," she laughed in disbelief.

"You liar, I was not scared," he scoffed, lying to her through his teeth.

"Really? And you just snuck into my dorm and shook me awake screaming about lightening because you were bored?" she questioned.

He thought for a moment, for some reason hesitant to answer the question.

"I-I hate thunder, alright?" he shrugged, as if it were nothing.

"I know you do," she assured him with a chuckle, watching as he struggled to understand why he'd answered the question that way.

"More Firewhisky?" he prompted.

"He left with the bottle. Remember?" Selina asked, forgetting the name of the boy who'd brought it.

"I have my own," he scoffed, pulling a new, full bottle out of his trunk, offering it to her.

"Go to sleep," Selina said firmly, grinning back at him as she left his dormitory.

*****

The next morning, Selina had reluctantly took her seat in Charms class with Professor Flitwick, waiting alone as she flipped through the day's lessons out of boredom. Draco Malfoy and a few of her other friends in Slytherin took their seats near her, as she sat sandwiched between Draco and a sweaty Crabbe who had definitely forgotten at least two different forms of personal hygiene that particular morning.

"Crabbe! You smell like absolute dog shit, bloody hell, when was the last time you bathed!" Draco exclaimed sharply, naturally plugging his nose for an added dramatic effect.

The large boy just shrugged, which Selina found especially promising.

"Did you hear about Quidditch tryouts? They're supposed to start a couple weeks from now," she told Draco.

"Please. As if I actually have to try out," Draco Malfoy scoffed smugly. "All I have to do is show up, and I'm the Seeker. I've got it made."

"That's the spirit," she muttered sarcastically, shut her book.

"Don't worry. I'm sure you'll be able to make Chaser again this year," he teased, "Crabbe probably knows he's better off just going out for Beater. He might not be a good...well... anything, but he's definitely got the build of a good Beater. Or three of them," he remarked snidely.

She couldn't help but smirk a little at Draco's stupid joke. Selina was equally as mean-spirited as Draco, whether others picked up on it or not. She was the kind of girl who seemed shy and timid, but really whenever she actually spoke, her words had a sort of sting to them. Usually, she chose to keep most of her less-than-kind thoughts to herself. The most important distinction between she and Draco was, of course, how they chose to express it. Oftentimes, they would clash with one another due to Draco's arrogance and rudeness towards those who didn't deserve it, combined with Selina's indifference and more evolved sense of humor. However, they still seemed to be able to get along, even if it wasn't always clear how. Not more than a few seats down, Pansy Parkinson sat scowling spitefully right in Selina's direction. She resented her easygoing friendship with Draco, the way he would readily approach her and speak to her, or joke with her, or share things with her, the way Pansy knew he never would with her. Why she couldn't be as good to him as Selina Romanov, she had no idea.

"You know, I'm getting sick of all these stupid restrictions. You can't even take a piss at night!" Draco complained. "But I suppose if I was a serial killer like Sirius Black, I'd come back here to kill Dumbledore, or that twat Potter, too."

"What did Dumbledore ever do to you?" she scoffed, ignoring his childish rants.

Draco Malfoy ignored her, engaging in his conversation with Crabbe and Goyle once again. Much of a fairly dull class with Professor Flitwick passed by, as Draco sat quietly beside Selina, patiently waiting for her to finish each item on the assignment as he copied down the answers.

"You know one of these days, you'll actually have to do things by yourself," she reminded him.

"But I have you to help me," he smiled, looking down as he leisurely decided on which questions to intentionally get wrong so as to make it seem as if he'd done his own work.

"Not to sound like a parent, but I can't always be around, you know," she pointed out.

"Well, that's sad," Draco pouted. "I like when you explain things, or tell me what to do. It's like having a teacher I actually like. You just get me!" he attempted to convince her.

"Whatever you say, Malfoy," Selina sighed, shutting her textbook.

She sat there playfully indulging Goyle's questionable attempts at polite conversation, awkwardly agreeing with his points, which she wasn't quite paying attention to anymore, some poorly stated and justified hot takes on the Chudley Cannons. Everyone except Gregory Goyle knew that the entirety of Slytherin House, as well as many of the other students at Hogwarts, were well aware of his gigantic crush on Selina.

"Sel," Draco interrupted him.

She was, to her own surprise, thrilled that Draco had decided to interrupt her conversation.

"We should probably get some Quidditch practice in," he digressed suddenly. "Meet you down at the pitch before dinner?"

"What's this? Malfoy? Practicing?" she sarcastically raised an eyebrow.

Malfoy rolled his eyes impatiently. "Shut up. I need to work on my skills, and I need someone to practice with who isn't Crabbe or Goyle."

"So, someone who doesn't have a limp penis for a brain?" she concluded.

"Yes, exactly. What do you say?"

"Alright then, I'll meet you out on the pitch at four," she agreed, "We'll split our time between both of our needs."

"Perfect. You're the only one good enough to practice with. If I had to spend one more practice with Crabbe running out of breath or Goyle getting his left and right confused, I think I'd have to walk myself straight into the Black Lake," Draco muttered mostly to himself.

*****

After the day's classes had come to an end, Selina took a walk down to the Quidditch pitch with Jasper Carroll, who she'd made friends with the year before. Jasper was a year older, and was also in Slytherin. She had run into Jasper on his way out of Defense Against the Dark Arts with Professor Lupin, the new teacher who everyone seemed to like.

"Honestly. Lupin's fucking hilarious. He totally told off that one Gryffindor who always smells like cheese," Jasper Carroll chuckled in his light Irish accent as they leisurely walked their laps around the pitch. "You really should've been there."

"Sounds like it," she agreed, laughing at the mental image.

"Do you walk the pitch every day?" he asked curiously.

"I would if I could," she nodded. "I do a lot, though."

"Is it really your favorite place at Hogwarts?" he inquired.

"It's one of them," Selina shrugged, "It's peaceful when it's empty, and comforting even when it's busy."

"What are the other good places to peruse?" he questioned. "Usually, when I want to unwind, I just stay in my bunk."

"Hmm. The courtyard's always nice, but a lot of the times, you'll either see people you don't want to see, or see people being as stupid as they can," she remarked. "The forest is always good, too. Sometimes, I see Hagrid out, and we wave to one another. In the winter, sometimes he'll invite me into his hut for tea."

"Hagrid's a very nice man," Jasper recalled, "He's nice to talk to. He's taken me out to the forest with him before, and he lets me take care of his dog. No wonder those Gryffindors are friends with him."

"Hagrid's one of the nicest people I've ever met, I don't know why people judge him so quickly," Selina said. "I wish he was my father."

"I wish he was my father and my mother," he agreed, making her laugh.

She had gotten to know him very well in the past year that they'd known each other. Jasper's mother had left his father when he was very young. Ever since, Jasper had told Selina that his father had always been distant and flippant with him ever since, choosing Jasper's stepmother and step siblings over him every time. His father didn't seem to speak to him at all, unless it was to criticize or reprimand him for not conforming to his wishes. Jasper's less than desirable home life was the subject of almost half of the letters he wrote to Selina over the summer. He never would've admitted it, even to himself, but as he watched Selina laugh he found it was something he associated with the idea of bliss itself. Something about her soft laughter was as serene and expressive as it could get. When he thought of laughter, he instantly thought of Selina Romanov and her deep, gentle chuckles. Seeing Selina chuckle for the first time not long after he had first met her was surprising and a little jarring, as if it was easy to forget that such a reserved and poised sort of person could smile and laugh. Something about Selina made her almost seem to be above laughter altogether. She was, on the surface, graceful and magnetic, with an angelic face that both pulled you in and kept you at a distance.

Selina had inherited all of the infamous Romanov characteristics. She had radiant olive skin and greyish blue eyes, framed by long black hair that just barely hid sharp cheekbones and an angular jawline, as well a long, thin button nose. Although she had inherited her father's features, she no doubt reflected all of her mother's beauty in them. Adeline Morais Romanov had been one of the most beautiful women in existence to any of those who had known her. She was both descended from nobility and known for her captivating, otherworldly beauty. Many men tried and failed to earn her hand in marriage, Selina's father Ilya had been considered blessed when he had married her mother. To hear of his brutal murder of his wife years ago was surprising to many, to say the very least. Although Selina had hardly known her mother, she found herself relating to her constantly as she got older, having read all of the old diaries that she'd left behind. Selina had related to Adeline in all of the things that she had found joy in, and even more so in her many sadnesses throughout life.

Adeline had always been a beautiful woman, especially to the men in her life. Including her father. The horrors of Adeline Romanov's childhood and her daughter's seemed be likened to one another by one thing in particular; Adeline's mother, Dominique Morais. Much like her mother, Selina had been subjected to a long childhood of silent suffering most easily defined by tears that she'd been struck for no matter the reason, as well as brutal fasting from a young age. Selina's childhood had never truly been a happy one, even in its best moments, no matter how much money she'd had growing up. It was one undeniable reason for her friendship with Draco Malfoy. He understood, when he would actually let on, what it was like to have everything but still never know warmth. Selina didn't have many friends at Hogwarts. The first person she'd met, Draco, was the first person who reminded her of the warmth of family. Draco was funny, immature, and kind, at times. He never made her feel sad or strange. He was willing to bring up her mother's murder, or tease her without fearing she'd burst into tears at any moment. Jasper, naturally, was the second person she'd met who she could also share that feeling with. Jasper Carroll was gentle and trustworthy, and she could tell he truly cared. Selina liked spending time with Jasper. Both of them often forgot that he was actually a year older. To them, they were true equals.

"How are you feeling about Quidditch tryouts this year?" Jasper asked thoughtfully.

Selina laughed emptily. "I wish you wouldn't ask that. That's all anyone's asked me about since they were announced."

"My apologies, then," he accepted, "Shall we discuss the cheesy Gryffindor, then?"

"No," Selina scoffed, "Absolutely not."

"Very well then. What would you like to talk about, then?" he asked grandly.

She grinned humorously. "Who says we have to talk?"

Jasper turned to her curiously, just as her form in its entirety seemed to disappear, transforming into the tiny figure of a sleek, black raven flying graceful circles around him. His mouth stood slightly open in awe, watching her with pleasure. He laughed happily as the little bird swooped back down, landing perfectly on his shoulder.

"Hello there," he beamed, very softly petting the bird's head with a single finger. "I'm still jealous you already mastered the Animagus ritual. You know, you'd think the older one would have accomplished it first."

With that, Selina flew off of his shoulder in her raven form, flying to the ground and landing softly in her typical human form. Becoming an Animagus was certainly an accomplishment, especially for someone so young, and was the sort of magical power that could only be managed with someone born to a parent with as much inborn talent as Adeline Romanov, or even Ilya Romanov, let alone the both of them.

"I guess I'm just that talented," she giggled. "You know, my mother was an Animagus, too. She was a dove, when she transformed. She was beautiful. I learned the ritual from one of her diaries."

"A dove? That sounds lovely," he thought.

"It really was, from what I remember," she nodded in agreement. "Watching her take flight... it was one of the most beautiful things I'd ever seen. It's one of the memories I hold onto the hardest."

"I can imagine why," he remarked. "Say, can I ask you a question?"

"What is it?" she asked.

"Do you... do you ever remember your father fondly?" Jasper wondered aloud.

Selina froze, not prepared to answer that particular question. She and Jasper had discussed her mother's death on many occasions, but rarely did he ever have any questions on the subject. And never had he asked that one. The only person Selina had ever fully told about her mother's murder was Draco, and even then, she'd kept many of the traumatic details to herself.

"Erm..." she hardly knew how to respond.

"I'm sorry, Selina," Jasper apologized to her immediately, "I really shouldn't have asked you that—"

"No, it's really okay, Jasper," she cut him off quickly, walking faster ahead, "It's fine. But I, er, I've just got to go..."

"Selina! Wait, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you," Jasper called, running after her.

"No, you didn't, I'm fine! But really, I've got to go now, I'm supposed to meet Draco for Quidditch at four, I didn't mean to stay this late," she quickly made an excuse.

Jasper watched in distress as she ran off back to the Slytherin dormitories to change. He considered continuing to run after her, but decided against it as he remembered the far away expression on her face when he'd asked about her father.

#draco malfoy #draco lucius malfoy #draco malfoy x reader #draco malfoy x y/n #draco x reader #draco x reader angst #draco fanfiction

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chachavroomvroom · 1 year

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FERRARI DELUSION TRAIN IS BACK ON THE RAILS 🚂 💨 ALL ABOARD

I think it’s the first time I see some red in the FP session graphics so far this year 💀

#f1 #formula 1 #charles leclerc #ferrari #australian gp 2023

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unhingedwomandiaries · 5 months

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I've been interested in the idea of attending one of those sketchy "mystery" kilo clothing sales for years. You know the ones - they pack random piles of used junk into plastic barrels, then charge you pennies per pound to dig through the wreckage like a raccoon foraging from a dumpster behind Wendy's. Well, someone finally dragged one of these sartorial dumpster fires to my municipality, so I jumped aboard the textile trash train. Early bird tickets were a whopping three quid, which is basically like paying to breathe air at that point.

I recruited my two wing-people for this safari because misery loves company (and splitting train fares). We pre-gamed by lurching around town at 10 a.m., haunting all the usual morning hipster dives - the chocolate shop, the candy shop that's clearly circling the drain, and the obligatory artisanal bakery that nobody really needs. When we finally sidled up to the kilo-plex, the line of fellow ragamuffins already stretched toward the cosmos. Dudes were straight-up strategizing on obtaining all the best Nike swag first so they could book it for the parking lot fencelike (ashamed) trapped raccoons. There was even a crazed blonde just strolling the queue, waving a crumpled tenner, and begging to cut to the front for money. The local rag had paparazzi stalking the congregation too, snapping pixels of these huddled apparel junkies for their big take-down exposé (as if anyone reads small town newsprint anymore).

Once the doors finally cracked, it was every tatter for themselves in a pushing stampede usually reserved for American families lunging at discounted flat screens on Black Friday. I'm talking body-on-body violence erupting over ratty 22-year-old Little League Baseball souveneers. Like some dude was straight-up fisticuffing another human because he wanted to own a dri-fit tank proclaiming "Shakopee Sno-Devils, 2001 Finalists!" Why? Do you even remotely care about 10-year-olds playing baseball in Shakopee, Minnesota in 2001? No, you absolutely do not. Nor do I believe you've ever been to that place.

While the peasants bludgeoned each other over silk rags, I beelined toward the handbag aisle where the day's true fortunes would be uncovered. I glimpsed a shipping crate emblazoned with those beloved Hermès boxes we've been conditioned to lust over since birth. My palms literally perspired as I cracked the seal, only to find the actual purse had already been hijacked from its cardboard shelter. Raptured. I briefly held a pink Prada bag in my hands before it was forcibly yoinked away by some more wanton pilferer. That was the trough's high-dollar ceramic penguin, now just a fleeting memory.

By checkout, my haul looked pretty measly - two skirts, two shirts, two scarves, all for a grand maximum of 43 measly pence. One scarf did happen to be low-key designer Gucci, which is kind of sad when you think about it. Like I literally paid pennies for an accessory some rich idiot once spent a monthly Dillard's wage on. We all have our checkered Buddhist moments of realizing all material goods are empty vessels waiting to be discarded after a few years of trophy ownership, I guess.

The clowns just kept flooding out of the car too - people were aggressively documenting their stupid clothing scores on social media like they'd unlocked the cover of Life magazine or something. Then we stopped for sustenance at this random "Bento" vegan place, which is a curious name since nothing they offered remotely resembled a Japanese bento box. My mate somehow ended up ordering "Sexy Mock Legs," which arrived looking like the vegan autopsy of a non-Brown Fraggle. Just a plate of creepy, smooth faux-frog appendages that nobody would want to ingest. We are a very bizarre species, are we not? Hunter-gatherers turned haul-uploaders, caping for the same singularly trite delusions with no collective awareness. Such is the fabric of modernity, I suppose. No pun truly intended.

#diary #worth the weight #haul

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coyging · 2 years

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https://twitter.com/RTNBA/status/1611789242732249094?t=Px50GqBLbUMlrF0cGCb1Dg&s=19👀

lakers fans delusion train all aboard

#myles 2 okc tho 😋#ask #anon

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shitty-fallout-art · 3 years

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Question for you danse lovers out there, would you still love him if he wasn’t pretty?

-During the begining phases of the Commonwealth Famine, the Brotherhood attempting to strengthen its stronghold within the Boston Airport by using recruitment tactics among settlements to gain food supplies, recruits, and a large influence over the area.

-Though as the Famine begin to ravish the vegetation and game, the brotherhood begin mass shipment of rations from the Citadel in the Capital Wasteland, including food and weaponary.

-A few of the high ranking paladins received impressive upgrades to their suits of power armor, one of them being auto-stimpak injection.

-The Brotherhoods position of power was brief but immense. Their presence both started and ended conflict quickly. They were a prime target among starvation delirious raiders, but they had the firepower and numbers to lay waste to any spot on the map that posed a threat. Much of the commonwealth was at one time under their control and influence, very similar to the legions method of keeping peace and order in Arizona.

-However, all contact with the Citadel mysteriously stopped out of nowhere and their ration shipments were no longer being received. Without a steady food supply (which was already thin to begin with) the brotherhood faced mass internal struggle and abandonment among recruits.

-In a last ditch effort, Maxson attempted to fly the prydwen back to the capital, However most eye witnesses will have claimed to see a very faint flickering blue light beneath the airship moments before it exploded.

-The explosion was so intense that not a single member aboard could have survived.....except for one very very unfortunate soul.

-Resilient though they may be, suits of power armor are not invincible. The magnitude and proximity of the explosion was enough to melt the locks of the suits shut and leave the soldiers inside to die a slow and painful death.

-Except Danse’s suit had received the automatic stimpak injection upgrade, and rising tension coupled with the the forced retreat from the commonwealth forced danse to keep a steady supply of stimpaks on him at all times (for his team too of course.)

-After surviving the initial forced expulsion from the airship and the subsequent fall, danse was trapped underneath the smoldering wretchage for hours trapped within his suit.

-Imagine experiencing the worse dull pain you’ve ever felt in your life. Sweltering heat and hot metal and suffocating air. And just when the pain dulls and you feel as though the oncoming death would be a mercy, you are suddenly jolted awake with a rush of adrenaline and the feeling returns to the high of intensity as you feeling your skin melting faster than the stimpak can force it to congeal again. That was all Danse can remember from that day.

-What he does not remember clearly is how the constant adrenaline rush provided enough kick to motivate him to grit his teeth and drag himself out from underneath the wreckage. How the joints of the suit were cushioned in such a way that provided him just enough mobility to walk away. How he broke his own arms trying to break the suit apart piece by piece until the stimpaks knit the bones back together incorrectly.

-Most of Danse’s days are spent in a blur of constant confusion and lost motivation. Most of the time he does not know where he is or where he is trying to go, only that he has to go SOMEWHERE.

-Using battlefield training and delusion desperation, he managed to administer a blood and iv drip, as well as a few other medical alterations. There is a pipe lodged within his torso that allows him to breath easier by forcing his chest to not collapse. However it is also stuck and holding his organs in. Removing it is not....good.

-Since he cannot eat traditionally anymore, he mostly steals and scavenges health items to undo the damage. He can sort of ingest liquids and the most common liquid “food” item he can find is blood.....

-His actions can be very unpredictable and contradictory. At times he can be professionally stern and duty driven, determine to preform his role as a soldier, other times his compassion and remorse will shine through and he will do anything in his power to help those around him. And at the worse times, his need to survive and his confusion and fear take over.

#paladin danse #shittys art #fallout #fallout 4 #shittys fallout aus #horrorout au #horrorout danse #shittys ocs #ask to tag #fallout au character profile

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socksnstuff00 · 2 years

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Do you think Glennon has the double date episode already recorded, and she was just waiting for this quasi official coming out as a couple before she released it?!?! All aboard my delusion train

yaaaaasssss thats how we do it Annie 🤣

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chaosandcats · 3 years

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Kugisaki was talked about present tense!!!!

wooo wooo Delusion train all aboard

#yes yes I know this could just be a translator error #or Panda just doesn't know what happened to Kugisaki #but have you considered #I love her #JJK #jjk spoilers #spoilers 155

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victoriareyloficlists · 4 years

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Engagements, Weddings, and Arranged Marriages

Updated 15 November 2021

Rest of the Masterlist.

(take me to) the lakes by akosmia (AO3 2021 Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: It’s a quiet Saturday morning and they've been dating only for two months, when Ben slips and calls her wife.) A Dog is a Man's Best Friend (and also a force for fate) by Impossiblefangirl0632 (AO3 2020 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben is dog-sitting for Poe and everything is going fine until BB sees a rabbit and runs off. Rey finds a muddy, but happy dog and takes him home with her. She's going to turn him into the shelter, she really is but before she can she runs into a very stressed, very annoyed Ben who accuses her of dognapping.) A Doggy Intervention by corpse_wife (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Interventions come in many different forms. Whether it's time, a place or occasionally, people, it's up to the universe to decide when two soulmates meet. In Ben Solo's case, the universe had a cruel sense of humor. For his intervention comes in the form of a German Shepard and his graceless brunette owner. Two things happened in the short span of a minute: 1.) Ben got tackled to the ground 2.) The dog had just swallowed his wedding rings) A Marriage of Rebellion by Zoa (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Historical AU, Quick Synopsis: Historical Arranged Marriage- Rey is a princess and must choose a prince to marry. Solely (at first) to spite her grandfather, she chooses the grandson of his old rival, Prince Ben Solo.) A merry Reylo Christmas by MeadowHayle (AO3 2018 Rated M Complete, 24 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey and Ben are roommates and celebrate the most wonderful time of the year together. For Rey it's the first real Christmas with friends and family and she wants to make up for all the things she missed as a child. Ben tries to help as best as possible, giving her a Christmas experience she deserves.) A Night at the Opera by orphan_account (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Historical AU, Quick Synopsis: Prince Benjamin is resistant to his arranged marriage to the Palpatine heir. ) A Scandalous Match by Musickat18 (AO3 2019 Rated T Complete, 18 Chapters, Regency AU, Quick Synopsis: Despite a very poor first impression, Rey has found herself forced to wed the mysterious and intimidating Ben Solo, Duke of Ren. The marriage is deemed highly scandalous by society as Rey is no more than an orphan living on the good graces of Mr. Unkar Plutt. Rey, now Duchess of Ren, finds herself forced into a role for which she has no training, with a husband who does not even seem to like her.) Adoration of One Rey of Light by stellarnightmage (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Since she was born, Rey Palpatine has been betrothed to Ben Solo, someone she's never met, and who's 10 years older than her. She hates the very idea. That is until they meet when she's 19 and Rey finds that it's hard to hate someone when they seem to adore you. It was her birthday, and the contract dictated she had to meet her husband-to-be on this god-forsaken day. She’d rather not ever see him ever. Or marry him. Or whatever.) All I Need for Christmas is You by Atchamb7 (AO3 2019 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben wants to make this Christmas special. He finds a rare toy that Rey has wanted since she was a child (baby doll) and attached to the doll is a ring.) an unexpected alliance by antematter (AO3 2019 Rated E Complete, 6 Chapters, Regency AU, Quick Synopsis: A Regency ABO story in which Captain Kylo Ren dallies with Miss Rey Niima, and she accidentally mates him.) And Closer Still Is Never Enough by lovefrompluto (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Historical AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben has an arranged marriage to Rey but what happens when he starts to court the wife who is a stranger to him?) And Your Kingdom Too by vuas (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Fantasy AU, Quick Synopsis: Her kingdom sells her hand the moment his thunderous black horse arrives at the border. Nobody fights for her honor like in the stories she’s read. There is no duty-bound, brave knight in possession of sparkling eyes coming to save her. There’s only the Red King and his bloody sword.) as luck would have it by prncesselene (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 16 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: When a case of violent food poisoning ruins Rose and Hux’s honeymoon plans, who better to take their place at a pre-paid Hawaiian beach resort than the Maid of Honor and Best Man? Sure, it’ll take some maneuvering, but a free vacation is a free vacation. They just have to pretend to be devoted newlyweds for a bit to enjoy it. There’s only one glaring issue, really: they can’t stand each other.) baby fever by cursebreakker (AO3 2021 Rated E Complete, 3 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey’s boss kylo basically has a heart of stone, he literally has a reputation in the offices as 'Satan’s right hand'. That is until Rey’s two year old daughter toddles up to him outside of work one day and he just completely melts.) Baby, It's Just Biology by Polkadotdotdot (AO3 2018 Rated E Complete, 32 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: For Rey Jackson, trying to finish your degree in Biomedical Science at Harvard is difficult enough when you're one of the few Omegas on campus. It's made even more difficult when your Professor is the one to trigger your heat. You can't help it, it's just your biology. An Alpha Omega love story.) before we go. by AquaWolfGirl (AO3 2021 Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Medieval AU, Quick Synopsis: On the eve before the battle against their enemies, General Rey Jakksun seeks out General Kylo Ren. There are others she could have gone to in their camp, sure, but of all the men there, she decides to ask him to teach her pleasure -- something she's never known and wants to experience once before she dies in the morning.) Bespoke by fettuccine_alfreylo (AO3 2019 Rated E Complete, 12 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: When new stylist Rey Jackson receives a request to dress the hottest (and most unfashionable) new actor in Hollywood, she gets a lot more than she bargained for. Mentally AND physically. Because Ben Solo is freaking massive.) But I Do by SpaceWaffleHouseTM (AO3 2019 Rated E Complete, 8 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey and Ben get married at the same venue at the same time. When both are left at the altar, they decide to flip life off and marry each other.) Butter Crisp Sandwich by DarkMage13 (AO3 2021 Rated M Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: “Mr, I insist you join me for a tea party today, at precisely noon. My teddy will be there.” Ben glanced at the boring clock on the wall. Ten minutes until noon. He swallowed in fear. There was no escape. Or: Ben Solo cannot say no to an adorable hazel-eyed little girl's request for tea.) Compass by SpaceWaffleHouseTM (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Historical AU, Quick Synopsis: Kira is not in the business of harboring fugitives aboard her ship, but for a doe-eyed prince disguised as a peasant, she makes an exception.) count the rings by lachesisgrimm (olga_theodora) (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 20 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Urban legend says the demon tree needs a bride in order for it to escape its confines. What happens when Rey jokingly marries herself to the tree during a camping trip?) Crystal Crowns by altargaryen (AO3 2021 Rated T Complete, 10 Chapters, Royalty AU, Quick Synopsis: Princess Rey Palpatine was a sprightly twelve year old the day her very best friend in the whole world left her. She is a women fully grown the day he returns, six years later, on the verge of taking up her own crown half a world away. A best friends to lovers, royalty romance.) Day Follows Night; Dark Follows Light Sequel by LyricalRiot (AO3 2018 Rated T Complete, 20 Chapters, Canon CD, Quick Synopsis: After the thorough defeat of the First Order, the Resistance is busy forming a new government, and two powerful Force users, Ben Solo and Rey, are in search of their destiny now that the war is over. Their new feelings for each other are strong, and they know they want to stick together, but learning what exactly that means is undiscovered country. Vague plans and a bit of planet hopping are all they have in their future for now, but it won't take them long to find the Force has other plans in store. Visits to old homes, nights of glamor and artifice, and exploring the secret deep places of the galaxy ahead. Steamy, but not graphic.) Deceit, Delusion, and Desire by AttackoftheDarkCurses, thebuildingsnotonfire (AO3 2018 Rated E Complete, 16 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: When Rey realizes her student visa is about to expire, she struggles to find a way to stay in the country legally. Her roommate has a terrible idea, and it's just risky enough to work.) Dreaming of a December Wedding by greywilde (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 11 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: A Reylo modern AU based on the Hallmark Christmas Movie, "A December Bride" Rey Jackson was supposed to marry Poe Dameron and have her dream December wedding - until he fell in love with her foster sister Kaydel. And it's all Ben Solo's fault. Now it's payback and he's her fake date to the wedding, but when Ben makes an impulsive announcement, it sets the stage for an elaborate holiday arrangement.) Eating for Two by Hellyjellybean (AO3 2021 Rated E Complete, 3 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey is pregnant and smells her neighbour Ben's cooking. She goes round to ask if he would be willing to share. But maybe Ben would like to share more than his cooking with Rey.) Fated and Inevitable by Kyriadamorte (AO3 2018 Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Canon AU, Quick Synopsis: Padawan Ben's life gets a whole lot more complicated when a group of Force users on Jakku demands he marry one of their own before offering aid to a floundering New Jedi Order. He refuses, of course. At first.) Five Times That Ben Saved Rey's Valentine's Day & How She Forever Saved His by AnneAnna (AO3 2021 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben makes a confession in his wedding speech: He knew he was going to marry Rey when he and Rey were 4 years old and she gave him a Valentine she made and colored herself. And 21 years later, he still has that Valentine.) for love or money by KiKi37 (AO3 2020 Rated M Complete, 30 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: The loss of a scholarship has left Rey Niima in a financial bind, with only a few months until graduation. Her friend Rose might know of something that could help.) Force du Couer by Stargazer1116 (AO3 2018 Rated T Complete, 24 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Kylo Ren is the CEO of a successful corporation in NYC. In a power play, his board, led by his uncle, demand that he marry to makeover his dismal public image. Rey is an art therapist working with foster kids in Harlem. When she contacts Kylo for possible support, he proposes a business deal that can benefit them both. He has no idea how much this woman with a fierce heart will turn his world upside down.) forever valentine by bellestar (AO3 2021 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben makes a confession in his wedding speech. He knew he was going to marry Rey when he and Rey were 4 years old and she gave him a Valentine she made and colored herself. And 21 years later, he still has that Valentine.) Gifted Forevers by ABeautifulBreakdown (AO3 2020 Rated M Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: When Rey said yes to Marrying Ben Solo she never expected things to get so out of hand. Now, on the day of her wedding, she's given a choice because all roads lead to him.) Go And Catch A Falling Star Chapter 18 by Ayearandaday (AO3 2020 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey asked for something to keep her warm for her birthday. Poe decides the best present he could get is Ben.) Go And Catch A Falling Star Chapter 45 by Ayearandaday (AO3 2020 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: From childhood to adulthood, Ben is practiced at catching a clumsy Rey.) Go And Catch A Falling Star Chapter 50 by Ayearandaday (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben needs to get married in order to get full ownership of his company. Rey learns about her boss' predicament and offers a helping hand.) Go And Catch A Falling Star Chapter 56 by Ayearandaday (AO3 2021 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Hungry overworked Ben accidentally ends up in McDonalds. Guess what happens next?) Go And Catch A Falling Star Chapter 59 by Ayearandaday (AO3 2021 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: This chapter was born during a video about how pockets on women's clothing shrunk through history. Modern Rey would be outraged to know that womankind used to have pockets big enough to stash a loaf of bread. Imagine all the snacks they could fit! But she would have to make do with her boyfriend's pockets. Yep, that's basically the plot. Warnings: if Reylo babies bother you, you might want to skip this one.) Good Opinion by Hormonal_Trashbag (AO3 2016 Rated T Complete, 4 Chapters, Regency AU, Quick Synopsis: “Will you allow me my freedom if I consent to marry you?” He blinked, startled by her question. “You cannot be serious. Regardless of what my mother may want, we have no need to marry.” The flickering candlelight cast wild shadows on her lovely face. There was something absolutely untamable about her, something he could never touch should he want to; Ben found that he decidedly did not. She was fierce and unforgiving as the sea, and he could not fully comprehend the twist of desire coiled in his gut at her unmoving gaze. Her response was simple. “Is that really true?”) Good Opinion by Hormonal_Trashbag (AO3 2016 Rated T Complete, 4 Chapters, Regency AU, Quick Synopsis: “Will you allow me my freedom if I consent to marry you?” He blinked, startled by her question. “You cannot be serious. Regardless of what my mother may want, we have no need to marry.”) heaven in hiding by blessedreylo (AO3 2021 Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: They say it's impossible for a guy and girl to be "just friends", but Rey and Ben had managed to discredit that throughout their decade long friendship. What they both have is special, that people would often arrive at the conclusion the two were made for each other. He's her safe haven, her rock. She gives him a sense of clarity and direction. Ben and Rey know each other more than anyone ever possibly could. Therefore on Valentine's Day, their friends decided to secretly set them up together on a blind dinner date.) Heavy in Your Heart by crossingwinter (AO3 2018 Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Medieval AU, Quick Synopsis: Kylo, a prince who decided to have one last good night before their arranged betrothal, fell in love with a stranger at the bar. They don’t remember much except a voice. The next day, the stranger at the bar is at the altar marrying her bethrothed when she recognizes him as the man she had fallen in love with last night.) Homestead Fire by ladyofreylo (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Prairie AU, Quick Synopsis: In this story, Ben Solo is a homesteader trying to court O. Kenobi's adopted daughter whilst on the prairie. He believes he will make Miss Rey a good husband. He shows her how when he stops by to chop wood and build up her fire.) Hope Is Like The Sun by LoufromJakku (AO3 2021 Rated M Complete, 15 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Leia tries to set-up her painfully single son with her assistant Rey. What Leia doesn't know is that Rey's already pregnant with Ben's child after a (drunken) one-night-stand and she hasn't told him yet.) How Not to Break Up by LadyBrettAshley (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Nothing means more to Leia than her Annual Pumpkin Carving extravaganza. That’s why Ben asks Rey to keep their recent breakup a secret until after the party. After a carving-related accident, Ben comes to her aid and it turns out... they may not have to tell anyone they broke up at all.) I Thee Wed by Hellyjellybean (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey is a wedding planner and on the wedding day she finds out that the young flower girl and the ring bearer are very stressed about their role in the wedding. Rey offers to walk them through it by pretending to be the bride so they could practice at the altar. They search for a fake groom amongst the wedding guests and find Ben. He agrees to help. ) I'll Pick You by greywilde (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 7 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey broke off her no-strings arrangement with Ben to move to the big city and broke his heart (and her own) in the process. Three years later, a trip to an apple orchard has her falling - literally - into the arms of the man she left behind. His feelings haven’t changed, but have hers?) I'm Your Dream Girl by Hellyjellybean (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Reylo AU where Ben & Rey are roommates but Ben is constantly blowing up at Rey for being messy, eating his food, but Rey always just smiles and takes it. That’s because she knows Ben’s secret. He talks in his sleep. Mainly about how much he loves her and wants her to be his wife.) ignorance of etiquette by blessedreylo (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Regency AU, Quick Synopsis: Lady Rey Kenobi lives a life of pristine comfort and luxury on her family's estate in Chesire with her parents Lord Obi-Wan Kenobi and Lady Satine Kenobi. When they receive word that an old family friend, Lord Benjamin Solo, is coming to visit, Lady Rey is reminded of how he tormented her as a child. She decides that she will prove herself not the same girl she once was in more ways than one.) ignorance of etiquette by blessedreylo (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Regency AU, Quick Synopsis: Lady Rey Kenobi lives a life of pristine comfort and luxury on her family's estate in Chesire with her parents Lord Obi-Wan Kenobi and Lady Satine Kenobi. When they receive word that an old family friend, Lord Benjamin Solo, is coming to visit, Lady Rey is reminded of how he tormented her as a child. She decides that she will prove herself not the same girl she once was in more ways than one.) In Sickness And In Health by Theyna_Shipper (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, 8 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey knows it's not an ideal situation, but it's a situation thousands of people are in. It's not like there's much she can do about it right now, anyways. She can go a little while without health insurance. Until she gets breast cancer. The treatment will be simple if she can get it. But she's worried she can't, until her old co-worker Ben offers a solution: "We could get married.") Inspired by Wasting Time on the Interwebs Chapter 8 by Theyna_Shipper (AO3 2020 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey and Ben are paired up for an economics assignment, but they have a major difference of opinion on some key points.) key to the kingdom by blessedreylo (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 12 Chapters, Princess Diaries AU, Quick Synopsis: Most girls get a drunk weekend in Vegas for their 21st birthday, but Princess Rey Kenobi gets the chance to rule the country of Alderaan. But the only way she can become Queen is if she marries a man in 30 days, or the throne goes to the selfish (and annoyingly attractive) usurper Lord Benjamin Solo. Will Rey be able to ascend to the throne or will it all just become a royal pain in the ass?) lay all your love on me by akosmia (AO3 2018 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben doesn't really think much of himself, and Rey is determined to change his mind.) Leave a Message by spicytofuuuu (AO3 2020 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben and Rey's relationship as told by the voicemails Ben leaves for Rey.) Let me Dream, Let me Stay by Melusine11 (AO3 2018 Rated E Complete, 12 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey has kept up a charade of a non-existant boyfriend for two years and now that Rose and Finn are getting married, she needs someone to pretend to be said boyfriend, enter her coworker Ben.) lie with me and just forget the world by hi_raeth (AO3 2021 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: For Rey Solo, the year is 2016. She’s just woken up in the hospital, she’s recovering from a car crash, and she’s wondering where the hell her husband is. For Ben Solo, the year is 2021. It’s been two years since the divorce, since the worst mistake in all of history, since the day he walked away from the love of his life. Sometimes, the universe has a weird (and potentially fatal) way of bringing people back together.) lucem ac viventis by neonheartbeat (AO3 2018 Rated E Complete, 17 Chapters, Beauty and the Beast AU, Quick Synopsis: In the midway of this his mortal life,/Poe found him in a gloomy wood, astray/gone from the path direct: and e'en to tell:/ it were no easy task, how savage wild/ that forest, how robust and rough its growth,/ which to remember only, his dismay/ renews, in bitterness not far from death/--Yet to discourse of what there good befell, /all else will he relate... discover'd there. A Star Wars take on Beauty and the Beast. Tale as old as time, in a galaxy far, far away.) Make Me Over by Hellyjellybean, Twisted_Mirror (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben Solo is a man with a past. The famous actor has used everything from drink to sex to try and fight his demons but maybe all he really needs is the love of a good woman? Rey Johnson is excited to have been appointed MUA to the lead actor on her first film set. From the moment she meets Ben Solo, she's a goner but does he feel the same?) make my heart a better place by defiersofthestars (AO3 2020 Rated M Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben is babysitting his niece and she begs him to FaceTime Rey so she can read her a bedtime story. He’s never met her but as soon as the call connects, he’s completely transfixed. He doesn’t tell her when the kid falls asleep because he doesn’t want her to stop reading.) My Dad Will Not Date Miss Palpatine (But Maybe He Can Marry Her) by AnneAnna (AO3 2021 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Annie Solo is perfectly happy with her Dad and brother and the last thing she needs is her dad's high school sweetheart coming to town and ruining everything. But maybe just maybe Miss Palpatine will be far better than she expected.) My Sandwich by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2020 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Someone took Ben's turkey sandwich at work, he is infuriated and eager for revenge, until he finds out it was Rey then those feelings no longer exist.) My Whole Life by AttackoftheDarkCurses, thebuildingsnotonfire (AO3 2018 Rated E Complete, 13 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: The "Without a Hitch" high school sweethearts, fake-dating rom-com AU.) Nevertheless, She Persisted by dawninthemtn (AO3 2019 Rated T Complete, 24 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Junior campaign staffer Rey works for US presidential candidate Leia Organa and ends up with the job of babysitting her aloof and entitled adult son Ben.) Newspaper Hearts by Celia_and (AO3 2021 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: “She made her Valentine’s cards. She tore hearts out of newspaper and glued them onto used envelopes and painstakingly wrote each child’s name. She probably spent days making them. And you know what she wrote on mine?” He doesn’t need to read it to know what it says, so he looks down at her instead, and the hand on her heart and the tears in her eyes. “Ben: You are OK. Rey.”) Nonsense & Nuptials by thehobbem (AO3 2021 Rated T Complete, 2 Chapters, Regency AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey is the ward of Leia and Admiral Han Solo. She lives alongside Ben Solo who is the victim of her repeated attempts at matchmaking. But her scheming reveals more about her own feelings and fears that she's missed out on something very important.) Of Colds by Armayra (AO3 2020 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey gets a cold and ends up feeling lonely. Ben plans to fix that.) Peacock by AttackoftheDarkCurses (AO3 2019 Rated E Complete, 22 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Thanks to a series of misunderstandings, failed attempts at flirting, and loud Katy Perry music, Ben grows to hate his new neighbor. Proposing to her wasn't the best solution to his problems.) Port in the storm by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey pretends to be afraid of thunderstorms so she has an excuse to sleep next to Ben. Ben figures it out when he races home early after seeing thunder, fearing Rey will be crying alone curled up in a ball, only to find her totally chill and eating ice cream.) Rey, Voulez-Vous Prendre Ben Comme Époux? by Theyna_Shipper (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey is her boss's best friend and is present at his French wedding. However, due to a language barrier, Ben and Rey are the ones who end up married.) Sleepyhead by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben, a mere himbo, tucks a stray hair behind Rey's ear in class. He knows he deserves the hot coffee in her hand to be thrown in his face and yet he gets a date. ) Something Beautiful by ceciliasheplin (AO3 2019 Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Medieval AU, Quick Synopsis: Lord Ren forces orphan Rey to marry him. On their wedding night he refuses to take her because he wants her to be willing. Rey is both enraged and frustrated. She may hate him but she isn’t exactly opposed to being ravished by her husband.) Sunshine and Gunpowder by rightforlife (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 8 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: She’s a teacher who would do anything to protect her student. He’s a glorified hitman with a heart of black gold.) Teenage Dream by ReyloRobyn2011 (AO3 2020 Rated M Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: They met on the playground in first grade. Ben saw the scrawny girl with three messy buns lining the back of her head from across the schoolyard. She sat by herself on the bench, watching the other kids play. He’d never seen her before; she was the new girl in class. Ben didn’t have any friends and he was too shy to talk to anyone— but there was something about this girl. He felt drawn to her.) The Background by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: He draws her every week. He draws her looking at him smiling, thoughtful, or truly magical, He pours his heart and soul into these drawings. Every Sunday he comes to the hospital room, hoping to meet her eyes. But she's not waking up. His hope is fading. Today...) The Five Times Ben Stole Rey's Halloween Candy and the One Time He Bought Her Some by AnneAnna (AO3 2021 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: They meet when Ben Solo tries to steal Rey Kenobi's Halloween bucket and Rey hits him over the head the with her plastic lightsaber. They eventually become best friends and then more. This is just all the Halloween Fall Fluff in the world.) The Soiled Doves by fernybranca (AO3 2018 Rated M Complete, 28 Chapters, Regency AU, Quick Synopsis: Luck raised Miss Rey Jakku from the streets into the household of Baron Luke Skywalker, and he willed her a fortune beyond the dreams of wealth—earning her the eternal hatred of Benjamin Kylo Skywalker Organa Solo, His Grace of Alderaan, who had counted on his uncle's money to rebuild his ruined ducal seat. But hatred bleeds into obsession, obsession into love, and the rules of the haut ton are strict.) The Trail Bride by SecretReyloTrash (BadOldWest) (AO3 2019 Rated E Complete, 47 Chapters, Historical AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey Niima finds herself in a perilous situation when her husband dies at the start of their journey West. From the few bachelors on the trail in her party; she attaches herself to the best of her options. That option is the mysterious Banker Ben Solo.) The Trial of Naboo: Fall of a Duke by Twin_Kitten (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Historical AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben and Rey are engaged to be married, but after several attempts on her life, he takes personal responsibility for her safety, including keeping her in his bed at night. Problem? Ben is extremely attracted to his bride but the MUST wait until marriage. ) The Ward by dreamingspires (AO3 2021 Rated E Complete, 18 Chapters, Regency AU, Quick Synopsis: An angsty, Bridgerton-ish/Alpha/Omega/Smutty mash-up, Ben rescues Rey and ends up her guardian.) the way I see you by ocjones (AO3 2021 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Historical AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben glides a finger over the painting’s shining face. It’s long since dried, having traveled the slow journey of hills between Naboo and Mortis, yet the varnish is so glossy it almost feels wet to the touch.And there she is: a soft-looking woman, her breasts pillowing over the top of her corset, her hair held lightly back with a band and flowing out behind her. Her delicate fingers grip a book, clasp it in her velvet-clad lap. The smile on her face is as gentle as her portrayal. His wife.) The Wedding Necklace by daughter_of_the_fifth_house (AO3 2020 Rated M Complete, 21 Chapters, Canon CD, Quick Synopsis: Nambi Ghima sensed Rey’s longing for a family and gave her a wedding necklace for her future husband - the necklace Kylo Ren ripped off Rey's neck. Which means getting married. First Order Officer Tishra Kandia is confused why she had to analyze said necklace. She and a lot of people – and droids – on both sides of this war wonder about the marriage of Supreme Leader Kylo Ren and the Jedi Rey. The only thing is… Rey and Kylo don't even know they’re married.) Through the Years by castles_and_crowns (AO3 2018 Rated T Complete, 10 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben Solo and Rey Jakkson meet on the playground as children under unusual circumstances and quickly become best friends. This fic follows them through the years, showing glimpses of their friendship as it slowly progresses into something more.) to climb steep hills by galvanator (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: No one really talks to the new girl who sits in the back of the class. She’s been here a month but kids are afraid of her and teachers are too overworked to be able to solve a problem like Rey. No one really talks to the new girl - except for Ben. A childhood to adulthood love story.) To Have and to Hold by bunilicious (AO3 2018 Rated E Complete, 5 Chapters, Medieval AU, Quick Synopsis: “Your husband is gravely injured, my lady.” The envoy’s words should have pleased Lady Rey. After all, her husband was one of the dreaded Norman barons who invaded her beloved country and claimed the lands in the name of the bastard who now called himself king. Ben Solo had stormed her uncle’s keep, killed all the men who opposed their new conquerors, and claimed the stronghold for his own. He took the keep, he took the surrounding lands and, at the new king’s orders, took Rey to wife. Rey should have hated him. But, in the six months following their hasty and undesirable marriage, Rey found that hatred for her new husband was the furthest emotion from her heart and mind.) Trick or Treat, Baby by Everren (AO3 2021 Rated E Complete, 7 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben Solo is not in the mood to deal with trick or treaters this Halloween. In fact, he’s taken measures to ensure he doesn’t have to. Can Rey, his next door neighbor and lover of all things Halloween, change his mind?) Unexpected by incognitajones (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 6 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey doesn’t want anything from her one-night stand Ben Solo, not even now that she’s broke, jobless, and pregnant. But he’s desperate to avoid a scandal that could derail his election campaign, so they agree to a cold-blooded business deal: she’ll marry him and be the perfect political wife—for a price, and a limited term.) weddings and wingwomen by bigfootsflannel (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: After hiring Ben Solo as her wedding photographer, Rose discovers her true calling as part-time matchmaker.) Wild Child by tmwillson3 (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 4 Chapters, Regency AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey spends her first Season in Bath with her best friend, Rose Tico. When Rose begins a hate-at-first-sight relationship with Sir Armitage Hux, Rey thinks that nothing more exciting could happen. That's when Sir Hux's friend, the Earl of Alderaan, and his dogs come crashing into Rey. Rey has never liked peers, but when she bonds with him on a rainy day, everything changes.) Wild Child by tmwillson3 (AO3 2020 Rated E Complete, 4 Chapters, Regency AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey spends her first Season in Bath with her best friend, Rose Tico. When Rose begins a hate-at-first-sight relationship with Sir Armitage Hux, Rey thinks that nothing more exciting could happen.That's when Sir Hux's friend, the Earl of Alderaan, and his dogs come crashing into Rey. Rey has never liked peers, but when she bonds with him on a rainy day, everything changes.) Worth the Wait by LadyBrettAshley (AO3 2021 Rated E Complete, 7 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: After being cheated on by her fiancé, Rey decides not to wait til marriage & decides to lose her virginity to known scoundrel Ben. "Scoundrel" Ben begs her for a dinner with him, worships her in bed and trails after her like a lovesick puppy. Rey is confused.)

#reylo #reylo fanfic

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starlightsearches · 4 years

Text

Scoundrel

So my inbox decided to delete every request that I had, but lucky for me I actually copied them all down this time! Here’s three requests that I’ve combined into one story, hope you all love it!

Anonymous asked: Lol you reblogged a head cannon from @historymiss about kylo and his “scoundrel” skills and it is just so funny to think about, I’d love to read a fic by you about it. Maybe reader is some type of smuggler being hunted down by the first order and they get away but not before they impress each other with shady skills?

Anonymous asked: Ooh! How about a prompt? “It’s a hobby of mine to prove you wrong” reader to kylo?

Anonymous asked: kylo x reader “is that blood?” “... no?”

Requests are closed ✨

Kylo Ren x Reader (no pronouns)

Warnings: some angst, language, mentions of sex pollen 😏, mild horniness, not a happy ending 🙁

There's no light at all in your hiding place, just the hard press of metal against your spine and the sound of your own breathing. You close your eyes, not that it changes the much, fill your lungs as quietly as you can manage and then hold your breath, listening closely to the sounds of footsteps as they move past you, the modulated mumbles of storm troopers as they head towards the exit of your ship. It's not easy to track their movements just by sound, but you don't think they found your stash, thank gods. If they all get off your fucking ship, you can be on your way in no time.

"Search completed, sir. No sign of the fugitives." You can just barely hear one of the troopers report to some silent supervisor, and your mind catches on the last word. Fugitives? Who were they looking for? Some people would pay a lot of credits for information like that. Despite its chaotic beginnings, today could still be a lucky one. You press your ear closer to the false wall that you hide behind, furrowing your brow in concentration.

"Complete searches of the rest of the ships, they’re here somewhere," there's a second voice now, and as soon as you hear it, ice floods your veins. You'd recognize that voice anywhere. Shit.

Your previous confidence in your hiding place leaves immediately, but you can't move, your sense of self-preservation still convinced that he might slip up this time. You're startled from that delusion almost immediately by a loud pounding sound, and then the panel covering your little shelter gives way to blinding light.

You land on your hands and knees with a loud smack, the impact driving spikes of pain through your bones. Someone—a trooper you assume—is on you immediately, yanking your hands behind your back. As soon as your eyes adjust, he's in your line of sight, filling your view with an expansive blackness.

"You again," he's crouched down beside you, the words almost quiet enough to be a whisper, and said with a kind of reverence that might only exist in your imagination. It's been a long time since you last saw Kylo Ren, but it feels like no time at all.

"We can't keep meeting like this, Commander," you reply, coating your words in a healthy level of sarcasm to hide any trembling that could break through, "People might think that you're in love with me."

He doesn't respond, because he never does, but he lifts his hand to your face, rubbing his thumb roughly against your cheek, the seam of his glove scraping against your skin. "Is that blood?" he asks in the same even tone, raising his hand to eye level; you can just barely make out the dark red smear against the black leather.

" ... No?" And then after a beat, "well, it's not mine." Nothing changes in the man before you, but you hear a modulated snicker from behind, and the trooper mutters an apology when Ren shoots him what you have to assume would be a glare if you could see the face behind his mask.

"Search them," Kylo Ren stands to his full height, and you follow close behind, yanked to your feet unceremoniously by the trooper. Some might find this situation humiliating, being cuffed and patted down on your own ship, but you're able to ignore it rather easily, choosing instead to keep your eyes trained on Ren. He returns your stare, his arms crossed tight over his broad chest, fingers flexing rhythmically against the swell of his biceps. No, being handled like this doesn't bother you at all, but you think it might bother him.

Your weapons are removed one by one, and it's a few minutes before the trooper is satisfied, attaching the cuffs to your wrists and giving you one final shove to signal the end of his search. "Should I take them back to the command shuttle?"

Ren stays silent, and your mind kicks in to lightspeed as you try to come up with a plan. If they got you off this ship, your chances of escape would diminish greatly. You'd need to stay aboard, but how? Fighting both of them wouldn't be an option, especially not weaponless. You'll have to make this up as you go and hope things play out in your favor.

"Leave the prisoner with me for interrogation," he says to the trooper, and you stifle a sigh of relief, "I'll need to search the ship again." You try to keep your emotions in check as you watch the trooper walk towards the exit, following him around the corner and out the door with your eyes. It's just you and Ren now. You could make this work.

He breaks the silence as soon as you're alone, plucking the thoughts right out of your head, "you're not going to escape."

"That's funny, I think you said that the last time we ran into each other," you keep your reply light, your tone laden with a healthy dose of mockery so he won't look any deeper. It's not easy to play tricks on a man with powers like his, which is why you've got to keep him distracted, uncomfortable. After all, this is your arena—he'll have to play by your rules.

He takes you by the shoulder, pushing you further into the ship with a shove that's probably meant to be harsh, but there's no heat behind it. "You can't get away from me," he says, more emphatically. His fingers press deeper into your shoulder, a heavy grip to emphasize his point, like that’s all it would take to keep you with him. He should really know better by now.

You shrug out of his grasp with a little twist, turning to face him in the small corridor, chest to chest, your bound arms sandwiched between you, your own reflection staring back at you through the eyes of his helmet. "I wouldn't count on it, Commander. It's become a hobby of mine to prove you wrong." Your voice is barely a whisper, the heat of your breath creating little clouds of fog on his mask—you're closer than most would dare to be. It's dangerous, the way you get in his space, dangerous how you challenge him, but gods, do you like it.

He chooses to ignore you again, refusing to take the bait, and instead continues his path down the hall, pulling you towards the cargo hold. It's mostly empty right now, with a few scattered transport bins littering the corners—just empty enough to fool any asshole who might try to poke their nose into your business.

"What are you hauling?" Ren asks, unconvinced by your sparse collection, searching the hold with slow, methodical movements.

"I don't know if you could tell, but I'm actually between jobs at the moment," you kick a crate of broken blasters to sell your lie, but it's clear he's not convinced as he walks the length of the hold, searching for any signs of hidden compartments. You take the chance to look around, as well, seeing if there’s anything that might aid your escape, or at least help you get the damn binders off. It’s a waste of time—there’s nothing in here for you, and even if there was, you wouldn’t be able to get to it without Ren noticing. You look back at him, just for a moment, checking to see if he’s distracted enough to ignore your scheming. By then it’s too late—you hear the sound of the panel lifting first, and it's only a second before he's opening the crate hidden beneath, too quick for the cry that rips from your chest but gets caught on the way out.

"Spice, really?" He reaches a gloved hand towards the container of the innocuous-looking yellow powder and your heart threatens to leap out of your throat, your feet moving towards him of their own accord.

"Don't touch that!" The words finally break free as you throw yourself at him—you don't really have a choice. The impact is hard, hard enough to upset his balance as he stumbles backward, catching you in his grasp, his hands gripping at your shoulders to steady you, too. You’re anchored in his arms, but your breathing is coming hard and fast, the adrenaline making home in your veins even if the danger has passed.

"Afraid I might contaminate your supply?" he whispers the question, the words coming low and mocking through the modulator in his helmet. He thinks it's his turn to get under your skin.

"That's not spice," you say, breathing hard, panic still coursing. "It's a highly potent kind of pollen used to, uh, stimulate arousal. Getting even the smallest amount of it on your skin or in your lungs can create an effect that lasts for weeks." He goes still against you, solid as stone, but you can feel his heartbeat running rampant through his body as he realizes the meaning of your words. Neither of you dare to move, afraid of worsening your already precarious situation, even though you’re well out of reach of the container. The tension has sucked all the air from the room and you stutter, trying to bring it back, "there's a king in the Kazyk sector who pays me good money to haul it for him."

"Is it contraband?" His gaze flits from you back to the powder, and then back again. Even though you can't see them, the pressure of his eyes weighs on you, bringing a heat to your cheeks.

"Depends on who you ask. It is expensive, highly coveted, and notoriously hard to transport. It can cause . . . complications when moved, if you're not careful."

"Complications?" You feel yourself flush, your entire body uncomfortably warm—the temperature control on your ship must be malfunctioning. It's only made worse by your proximity to Ren; you can feel his heat passing through the thick fabric he wears, smothering you.

"Do I need to spell it out for you, Commander?" You had wanted to mock him again, using his title like that, but the whisper that leaves your parted lips is absent of any ridicule, your words so soft and wanton that it sends a shiver up your own spine. You can't help but wonder if he's blushing under the mask—if his thoughts are currently consumed, like yours are, by images of bodies intertwined, heady moans passed between parted lips, his hands—ungloved—exploring every inch of you . . .

Your wrists tug against their restraints, unbidden. It's a good thing that you're still cuffed, because if they weren't, you're not sure what would stop you peeling back those layers he wears, taking off that stupid helmet, finally revealing his face. What would he look like, laid bare before you? What would it feel like to be encircled in his arms with nothing between you but desire?

You ball your fists, fingernails pressing crescents into your palms as you try to remove these thoughts from your mind, forcing yourself out of his grasp with a sharp tug, trying to breathe again. Gods, what is wrong with you? Some of the pollen must have gotten into the air and made its way into your system. You turn back, hoping to confirm your theory, but the little pile of yellow powder sits undisturbed, and the air in the cargo hold is heavy and still.

"Just put the lid back on it. I'm not hauling anything else," you command, and to your surprise, Ren obeys, replacing the cover on the container gently so as to not disturb the powder beneath. He grabs you again, by the arm this time so that he can keep his distance, thank gods, not that it helps you cool off—the heat stays trapped beneath your skin for much longer than you’d care to admit.

He takes you through the rest of the ship, stopping occasionally to open one of the many hidden storage compartments scattered throughout, cracking locks, breaking codes seemingly without even trying. He finds all of them—even the ones you made yourself, ones you were sure nobody would be able to locate without your help. It doesn't matter anyway; you were telling the truth before. You're not hauling anything else.

You lean against the wall, watching as he rips away the edge of another panel in the floor, finding it empty, and you roll your eyes. "Not to be a dick, but can't people like you just feel if I'm harboring fugitives on my ship?" He looks up at you, and you hope he can’t see the way you’re still shaking, hope he can’t feel any of the shame you’re trying so desperately to hide. You need him off your ship—no more complications, no more interference.

"People like me?" he asks, with the slightest hint of laughter, just barely detectable behind the modulation. So he does feel it—your embarrassment, the leftover yearning that you can’t seem to elude.

You roll your eyes again, as if the movement itself could create the nonchalance you’re trying so hard to mimic. You want to be annoyed at him. You want to be unaffected, cool despite what just happened. But it’s not working. "You know what I mean. Couldn't you just sense them?"

"I know you're not hiding the people we're searching for,” he admits, sliding the floor panel back in place, “and I found all of these- "he gestures vaguely down the hall, the evidence of his handiwork littered along the corridor "-on my own." It’s hard to be sure when you can’t see his face, but you think he might be smug about it all.

You furrow your brow, thoughts humming, trying to piece together this interaction in a way that makes sense. When that fails, you resort to mockery.

“. . . So you've been ripping my whole ship apart for what? Just to show off?” Your heart jumps when you see him freeze—the physical changes slight, but not beyond your notice—a slow smile spreading across your face. You’ve got him now.

“You are trying to show off, aren’t you? I have to admit it, I’m impressed,” he stays where he is as you move closer, the visor of his mask trained on you, his muscles taut like he’s ready to run. Who would have thought that, in this scenario, you’d be the dominant one?

“That’s not-” he stutters—you can hear it through the vocoder, and you laugh, just a short, breathy thing. You shouldn’t let yourself get distracted from the goal at hand, but this is much more fun.

“No need to be embarrassed, I tend to have that effect on people. Everybody loves a scoundrel.” You flash him a cheeky smile, and he bristles, folding his arms over his chest again and standing to his full height. You can see the tension in him, practically pulling him apart. He wants to run from you. He wants to stay.

“Not me,” he says like he wants to believe it, but you can’t miss the way his voice shakes.

“You especially, Commander. The Order and its people are far too proper for someone like you. There aren’t enough scoundrels in your life.”

The silence that follows your words fills the space, leaving little room for air. Maybe you’re hallucinating, but he might inch closer, his fingers twitching, maybe to reach for the latches in his helmet, maybe to bury them in your hair.

The sound of pounding footsteps against the durasteel floor shocks the breath back into your lungs, but even as the trooper dashes into view, Ren doesn’t pull away.

“Sir, there’s a problem,” the trooper huffs, and after a pause, Ren rips his eyes away from you. The trooper hesitates, now, realizing that he’s barged in on what probably looks to him like a private moment. “Uh, there’s a small band of Resistance fighters attacking the troops, we believe they’re here for the fugitives.”

Ren’s immediately on the move, his cloak snapping from the speed of his departure, and you and the trooper glance at each other for a moment before they follow after Ren, and you do too, curious to see the commotion. Despite his limited headstart, Ren seems to have vanished from the corridors of your ship, no trace of him at all, the only sounds echoing through the hallway coming from your own footsteps and the soft jingle of the trooper’s movements.

The jingling. You’re almost to the door before you realize what that sound means, and you want to smack yourself. You can see the keys now, out of the corner of your eye. Escape had never been closer, and you almost missed it. You choose to ignore the voice in the back of your mind that reminds you about what had caused you to become so distracted. You don’t have time to think about it now. You have a plan.

The trooper startles when you yelp, tripping over nothing before you go sprawling, landing on the floor with a clang. You watch him from the ground as he stares back at you, hesitant, glancing towards the exit before his eyes fall to you again.

“A little help?” You sell it, make it look like a struggle as you try and fail to find your feet, but the trooper still doesn’t move just yet, and you resist the urge to roll your eyes. Then he takes the bait.

“Thanks,” you mumble under your breath, falling into him as he pulls you to your feet, bracing yourself against the duraplast of his uniform before pulling the keys from his belt with a deft tug and tucking them into your palm.

He doesn’t even notice, running as soon as you're stable, and you follow behind, spinning the key in your palms angling it just right until you hear the snap of release. You catch the cuffs, trying to limit the noise they make as they fall from your sore and stiff wrists. You’re free.

The trooper exits the ship immediately, off to help his comrades, but Ren is still by the door, deflecting the odd blaster fire. Most of the fighting is far past your ship, on the other side of the yard, but one or two stragglers have decided to aim his way. You watch from around the corner, listen as the sounds of fired shots ends with strangled cries. You move in behind him, getting close, holding the cuffs in place as best you can.

“Looks like the fight has moved on without you,” you announce your presence, and he turns to look at you, but your eyes are on the saber, burning bright and wicked by his side. “Impressive, but not very useful long range. Blasters are more . . . versatile.”

He gives you a hard look—a searching look—before raising his hand, the fingers flexing in his gloves. Your blaster, the one the trooper pulled off of you earlier, nudges past you on its way to his hand and you jump out of the way, hardly noticing the smooth movement with which he fires, the bodies dropping even from this range as he shoots into the crowd with perfect accuracy.

You’ve never seen him in action like this before. Despite the number of times you had come face to mask with Kylo Ren, he’s never used his powers on you. Something about the realization is frightening.

“We need to leave,” he says, interrupting your thoughts, “back to my shuttle.” He’s looking at you again, head inclined, like it’s a question instead of a demand. And the stupidest part of you wants to go. You force that part of yourself to be quiet.

He deactivates his saber, drops your blaster and reaches for you, his hand stretched out the same way it had only a few moments ago, but there’s none of the same power behind it; you still feel the pull.

“I know,” he says, and the cuffs fall from your hands because there’s no point in hiding anymore, “but . . .you still could-” he swallows hard enough for you to hear through the modulator, “-we still could . . .”

You walk towards him, your footsteps slow and even and he trembles, his fingers shaking again for an entirely different reason, and they don’t stop, not when they meet your waist, not when your hands grip both sides of his helmet, trying to find a hold against the cold metal.

“I’ll tell you what, Commander,” you say with a whisper, pulling him closer, close enough to rest your forehead against his, “I’ll go with you . . . the next time you catch me.”

It’s a smooth movement, unexpected—first you pull him close, pressing a kiss to the front of his mask, imagining the way his lips must be flushing in response, imagining what it would be like without the ridiculous apparatus in the way. He’s unbalanced, a little surprised, and when you push him back he doesn’t anticipate it, falling, flailing, until he lands with a thud in the soft mud outside of your ship.

“Until next time, Commander!” you call down to him as the hatch lifts, running to the cockpit as fast as your legs will carry you. You’re in a panic as you start up the ship, a shake in your hands that makes it hard to hit the right controls but you don’t stop until you hit lightspeed, trying your hardest to breathe.

You plug in the right coordinates and sit back in the pilot’s chair, brushing your hand across your cheek, picking up the stray moisture that lingers there. You don’t remember when the tears started. You’re not sure how to stop. It seems like today isn’t your lucky day after all.

#kylo ren x reader #kylo ren x you #kylo ren fanfic #kylo ren #my writing #requests #anons #historymiss

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