lostandnefarious

[changbunnies]

Revelation (18+)

♡ Pairing: Vampire Priest!Jeongin x Fem!Reader

♡ Genre: very loosely inspired by midnight mass (tv), horror themes, vampire / human relationship, smut, possibly dead dove? read the warnings carefully and come to ur own conclusion on what you're willing to read before engaging pls :')

♡ Word Count: 4k

♡ Summary: The suspiciously young and extremely handsome priest of your small-town church has a very big secret– and it's not until he's sinking his fangs into your neck that you discover what exactly that secret is.

♡ General Warnings: usage of typical vampire abilities (increased senses, strength, etc), descriptions of blood, religious themes (specifically catholicism focused), references to religious guilt + shame, reader does not trust jeongin at all (for good reason lol), very blatant manipulation, cult vibes? jeongin basically has the whole town under his thumb so. do with that what you will lol

♡ Smut Warnings: dubcon, vampire venom that acts as an aphrodisiac, sexual acts inside a church (specifically in a confessional booth), some gendered language (dirty + good girl), dom/sub dynamics, dom!jeongin, biting + blood drinking, thigh riding, fingering (f rec), a lil bit of praise kink, corruption kink?

♡ Notes: this is possibly niche but well. the vampire priest concept lives rent free in my head thanks to midnight mass, and innie said he wanted to be a priest + he'd definitely be a sexy vampire so here we are lmao. and sorry i'm suddenly posting out of age order for my late kinktober fics but i ended up finishing this before the other members i still have left :')

♡ Disclaimer: please read responsibly, and remember that this work is fiction and meant strictly for imaginative fun. the idols used in fics are more accurately faceclaims and personality outlines for imaginary characters, and should not be interpreted as factual representations of existing people.

There's something that isn't right about your local church's head priest. Firstly, his age doesn't make sense; who on God's green earth becomes a priest in their 20s?

At least, you assume that's around how old Father Yang, who notably prefers to be called Jeongin, is– you've never been told, and you've never asked, but he certainly doesn't look any older than that.

Secondly, why are his sermons always at night? In all the towns you've ever lived in, in all the churches you've ever frequented, this is the first time you've ever experienced your standard, weekly Sunday service routinely happening at 9 p.m.

And thirdly, why is it that everyone who meets with him for confession comes back looking delirious and.. euphoric, almost? You don't get it– sure, confessing your sins is freeing; asking for and receiving God's forgiveness is among the best feelings that can be experienced if you're a devout believer, but still.

Something about all of it just doesn't sit right with you– and to make matters worse, you seem to be the only person in town suspicious of him. You're new to town, have only been here a handful of months, so you get it– you're the outsider, you don't know him like they do, et cetera, et cetera.

But how can not a single other person in town be bothered by how strange it all is? There has to be an explanation– you don't know what it is, and you don't know why you're the only one who seems to care, but there must be a reason.

It's Sunday again, and you spend the entire sermon watching Jeongin like a hawk, trying to catch any sign as to what it is about him that has all these people so enraptured. And while it's not necessarily wrong for him to be, another thing that strikes you is that he's easily the most casually dressed yet stylish priest you've ever met.

He wears the standard clergy vest and rabat, as he should, but over it is a leather jacket, and he wears denim blue jeans instead of dress pants. His shoes are sleek and polished, he has pretty, ornate rings decorating his fingers, has expertly styled slicked hair and silver earrings dangling from his pierced ears.

Again, it's not necessarily wrong, but it's definitely something you wouldn't think a priest's Sunday best would entail. And maybe that's only because the priests in your life have only ever been old, and didn't put much thought into style, but maybe that's what people like about him?

Maybe it makes him seem more down to earth and approachable; maybe it's easier to confess your sins when, outstanding devotion to God aside, he seems like as ordinary a person as any other. Of course, that's logically always the case, but some priests have an intimidating "holier-than-thou" attitude about them, and it certainly helps Jeongin's case that he seemingly makes an effort to not give off that vibe.

And admittedly, he's charming– there's something so uniquely handsome about the way he smiles while preaching God's word, how his eyes twinkle while he recites a scripture and relates it back to a point he made several minutes prior; you can't deny that it's enthralling.

But when he looks over the attendees lined in the pews, it always feels like he's looking straight through you, seeing to the depths of your soul and laying it bare. It gives you chills, honestly; makes you feel exposed in a way that's indescribable; like with a glance alone, he knows all your secrets, your every sin, down to their most minute details.

It's near midnight when his sermon ends; you stay seated in the backmost pew to the left, brows furrowed as everyone shakes his hand or hugs him, thanking him for another "terrific service." It's so bizarre– and it's not until the last of the congregation exits the small, wooden church that you begin to rise from your seat.

Though you're sure the church carries electricity and that the lights can be flicked on, the priest never does so– he always uses candles, casting a warm yellow glow on the dingy, white wood of the walls. It casts more shadows, gives the place an almost unsettling air– and when he turns to you, just as he's closing the Bible in his hand and setting it down, it sends a shiver through you.

"You're still here," Jeongin smiles at you from where he stands before the altar, centralized at the head of the church. It's a kind enough one, but you don't trust it; you can't shake the feeling that something lies beneath it– something abberant and dark that you can't place, but are certain is there.

"Do you wish to confess?" he asks, motions to the confessional booth with his hand as he tilts his head. "No," you answer, perhaps too quickly– and his smile grows ever so slightly, as if he's amused. At least, that's how you perceive his expression; and it makes you narrow your eyes at him, the distrust that radiates off you certainly palpable.

Your opinion of him is no secret, really; and he can tell you're scrutinizing him, trying to catch him in whatever act you think he's playing– it won't work, but it does humor him that you're trying. He doesn't know what sort of wild conclusions you've come to about him, but if you see anything, it'll be because he himself wanted you to see it– until then, you won't learn a single thing about who he truly is.

"Is there a reason you're still here then?" Jeongin questions next, and you swallow, hesitant to answer. Admittedly, you only stuck around in case someone did decide to go confess to him– you intended to eavesdrop, to try to listen in and find out what's really going on behind closed curtains.

It would've been massively immoral, but you would've confessed and asked for forgiveness later– privately, that is. You have no intention of seeking the Father's help in such matters, given how little trust you have towards him.

But still, despite the fact that you were willing to sneak around and listen to private conversations, you aren't entirely willing to lie in the house of God– so after some internal grappling with yourself on what you should and shouldn't do in this position, on what is right and wrong, you end up admitting the truth.

"I don't trust you," you tell Jeongin plainly, and you can swear you see him trying to suppress a smirk.

"I'm aware," he says, so matter of fact that it almost sends you reeling. And it's not that you were so disillusioned into thinking you weren't being obvious; you know very well that you weren't being the most covert in your suspicion of him– it's how unbothered and amused by it he seems to be that really gets you.

Shouldn't he be offended? Question your reasoning? Try immediately to dispel your doubts and clear up any misconceptions you may have? Instead, he seems more than ready to just accept it for what it is– even seems entertained by it.

"Does it not bother you that I don't trust you?" you ask, and he almost laughs as he shakes his head. "No. There's no reason for it to," he answers simply; and before you can ask why, or what he means, he's already answering– you suspect he could already tell you were going to press him on the matter.

"God teaches us to love one another. So even if you do not love me, or trust me, I love you, just as God instructs me to," Jeongin smiles as he speaks, and again, your brows furrow. It's a perfect answer, really– but it feels.. inorganic, almost rehearsed.

And the glimmer in his eye throws you off; it doesn't feel like the pure, honest delight you'd see on a priest putting God's word into practice. It feels mischievous, deceitful– like he doesn't believe an ounce of what he's saying, but he wants you to believe that he does.

"I know what you're thinking," he says, and you swallow, stiffening where you stand as he continues, "And if you really want to know what goes on during confession, want to see for yourself what it is I do to help the people who look to me, I can show you."

If you're being entirely honest, the offer is tempting; and strangely, it also makes you feel.. bad, almost– makes you second guess yourself. Because if he's freely offering like this, surely it can't be whatever you've been making it out to be in your head.

There's no way he'd out himself, and whatever it is he does, just to gain the trust of one person out of hundreds who doesn't believe his pure intentions. And maybe the other townsfolk really do trust him for good reason; maybe you've just been examining the situation and looking at Jeongin and the church in the wrong light.

Maybe you've been blowing everything out of proportion with obscene assumptions, and maybe he really is just a good priest. Maybe he makes you feel so seen, heard, and whole, that all your worldly problems melt away, feel trivial and light in comparison to God's plan for you.

Because after all, you are the outlier here. You're the only one in the whole town that doesn't trust him; and surely that means you're the one in the wrong. Jeongin does things differently than you're used to, but that doesn't mean he's inherently bad. And maybe you should confess– ask God to forgive you for not being receptive to the word of one of His servants.

Jeongin smiles when you concede and start to slowly step your way to the confessional. You pull back the curtain, step inside and prepare to sit in the small, wooden booth seat, but you quickly realize he's followed you inside. You gasp as you turn around, back pressing against the intricately carved hardwood window of the booth as he closes you in.

"Sh-Shouldn't you be on the other side?" you ask, much too meek for your liking. It's a cramped fit given that the booth is only meant to fit a single person on either side at a time; it makes you unconsciously hold your breath as you're effectively caged inside the booth with him– nowhere to go, and nothing you can do but stare at him, bewildered.

"No," he answers as quick and simple as before, his smile once again growing ever so slightly. And maybe you could push him, try to dart past him if you manage to successfully make him topple back, but you feel frozen– because even in the dark, barely lit confessional you're in, you're certain that you see his dull canines become long, pearly white fangs.

"Don't worry, it will only hurt for a second," he assures you as he brings his hands to your arms, gripping them just below your shoulder as he leans towards you. You shudder, his breath fanning your ear as he inches towards your neck, "but after that– it's bliss."

You feel the sharp points of his teeth poke at your skin, and it makes you gasp as your head tilts to the side, making room for him to sink his fangs into your flesh. Instinctively, your hands search for something to grab; you end up reaching for his shoulders, twisting your hands in his leather jacket to ground yourself as his sharp teeth pierce into your neck.

Your legs wobble, and he forces one of his own between your thighs, uses it to keep you upright as he drinks from you. And there is pain, but it really is only for a second, just like he said it’d be– within seconds it melts away, and oh, you instantly understand.

It’s much, much more than bliss– it’s ecstasy, it’s rhapsody, it’s the greatest pleasure you’ve ever felt. Spreading from your neck to every last nerve ending in your body, every atom of your body becomes alight with euphoria as his bite sends tingles throughout you, raising goosebumps along your skin.

You cry out, an embarrassingly loud sound that you barely recognize as your own voice as one of your hands finds its way to his head. Your fingers thread into his hair, hold him to your neck as if you don't want him to ever separate from you– and to be fair, maybe you don't.

It feels so good, so exhilarating, intoxicating, that you almost don't want the sensation to ever end. Jeongin meanwhile lets out delighted hums, eventually slowly retracting his fangs to latch his lips around the sensitive, bruising skin, his tongue lapping away at the blood that pours from the two little marks left behind.

The beating of your heart quickens, breaths quickly growing labored as the inexplicable want continues to seep into your veins. Your thighs tremble as tension builds deep in your gut, and they try to press together to seek relief, but Jeongin's leg stays firmly nestled between yours, preventing it.

And were you not so utterly blissed out, maybe the incessant, desperate throbbing of your pussy would make you feel ashamed– but all you can think about is the deep seated desire overtaking every receptor, every tiny cell, every molecule within you, as if the very chemistry that makes up your being has been altered for Jeongin alone.

Unable to resist, you rut against his thigh, entirely shameless and feverish– because it's all you have access to, all you can do to relieve the growing ache between your legs. It’s sinful, your growing lust is– and the last place you should ever be doing this is inside of a church; but you’re too far gone to care, too gripped by the need for stimulation.

Jeongin lets go of your arms, reaches between your bodies to hike up your church gown, giving you easier access to his lean, muscular thigh. He’s gracious, tugs your soaked panties to the side so your clit can catch on the denim of his jeans– and the delicious friction makes you moan for him, loud and sweet. 

He pulls away from your neck to watch your desperate humping, eyes gleaming with mischievous satisfaction as he watches you pleasure yourself on his thigh. His eyes are perfectly adapted to seeing in the low light, and so he can easily see every little detail of you– from the mess your pussy leaves behind on his jeans, to the sweat beginning to drip down your temple, to the trembling of your bottom lip before you tuck it between your teeth. 

And when he smiles at you now, it’s like the fox that got the rabbit; even in the extremely dim candle light you can see the way your blood coats his lips, messily dripping from the corners of his mouth and down his chin. His dark eyes are gleaming– because he has you ensnared, and you both know there’s no going back. 

You untangle your fingers from his hair, and you watch as he reaches for your falling hand, grabbing your wrist and bringing it to his mouth. He holds your gaze as he kisses over the pulsing vein, and it makes your breath hitch, the blood on his mouth smearing over the surface of your skin, staining it crimson. 

“Should I bite you here too?” he asks, placing another kiss over your vein before he shoots you a grin full of fang, “you’re so delicious– I want to taste you even more.” You gasp and squirm as Jeongin presses the tips of his bared fangs against your skin– not quite biting just yet, but it’s enough to spread another wave of tingles over your body. 

“Yes, bite me, please!” you cry, voice almost frantic in its urgency– and you can see the corners of Jeongin’s lips twisting into a devious smile before he’s obliging, burying his fangs deep into your wrist within an instant. You wince, your fingers clenching as he squeezes your wrist in his hand, keeping it tightly pressed to his mouth. 

And just as before, within seconds the sharp sting dulls and ebbs into incomparable pleasure, goosebumps spreading over every inch of your heated skin. Faintly, you can see your blood dribble past his lips, slowly flowing down the length of your forearm before it drips to the floor of the booth. 

You can just barely see his tongue licking over his bite, doing his best to collect all the blood that spills from you, and it's mesmerizing– especially when he brings his fingers to your arm to swipe up what his tongue misses. Your stomach flutters as you watch him separate from your wrist and bring his bloodied fingers to his mouth; they're so long, so pretty and enticing– you want them.

Jeongin can see it in your eyes– how brazenly you stare at his fingers, how your eyes follow every move he makes with them. You're still panting, sweating, chest heaving from the exertion, but the rutting of your hips has faltered; and he grins as he gazes at you. You're once again left with the feeling that he sees through you– that all it takes is a glance for him to know everything you're thinking.

"You want them? Want me to stuff your cunt full with my fingers? Make you cum all over them?" he asks, entirely rhetorical; he already knows the answer. And he likes the way you writhe over the question, how you gasp over the sinful words he so freely spills in such a sacred place, your ears positively burning.

Even if your face didn't obviously show your desires, you don't think you'd be able to deny them; you've never wanted anything as badly as you want this, want him. It should make your gut twist with shame, because deep down you know this is wrong, know that you shouldn't want him to touch you as badly as you do– but the craving for Jeongin to bring you pleasure is almost primal, so deep and innate that your rational mind can't even hope to fight against it.

Slowly, almost playfully, he trails his fingertips over your thigh, and the anticipation is enough to make you unconsciously hold your breath. "You're so fucking messy," Jeongin says as he brushes his fingers over your soaking, sensitive clit, "so wet– you're a dirty girl, huh?"

You want to whine, want to shake your head and vehemently deny that you're dirty, attest to being a good, honest, and God fearing– but you're so overcome with your desire for him to touch you, that you don't. Instead you agree, concede that you are dirty, and messy, and that you want him more explicitly than you feel your own words could ever attest.

How easily you agree to being dirty seems to please him– and with a light chuckle, he slips his hand further down while carefully removing his leg from between your thighs. You wobble a bit when the support of his leg is gone, but he's quick to wrap an arm around you to hold you, effortlessly keeping you upright with the strength innate to who, or rather what, he is.

The cool, silver band that he wears on his pinky makes you jolt when it touches your feverishly hot thigh, and he chuckles again as he spreads your folds with his fingers. You're dripping for him, so slick with arousal that it hardly takes any effort at all for Jeongin's fingers to become coated with your juices.

You rock your hips against his hand, wordlessly begging him to give you what it is you crave most. "Oh look at you, so impatient, so desperate," he laughs as he presses the pads of his fingers to your hole, delighting in the way you look at him with glassy eyes and pinched brows.

It's obscene how badly you want him; you've never felt this needy, never been rendered so desperate for stimulation– and you're in a confessional of all places. This is the very last place on earth you should feel this way, or be doing something like this, and yet the shame you should feel is far from your mind– because all you can think about is your need for his beautiful fingers to fill you up and dull the throbbing ache between your legs.

Jeongin coos when you start to beg for his fingers, a rambling string of "please," and "want it, want you," and "need it so bad." You can tell how much satisfaction it gives him, and if your mind weren't so hazy from desire you'd certainly feel embarrassment build and twist from deep in your gut– but any such feelings are silenced by your body's need for his touch, by your craving for the sensations that only he can grant you.

It takes your breath away when he easily sinks two fingers inside you, thrusting them in and out slowly until he curls and bends them to find the spot that makes you see stars. "That's it, there you go," he grins when he finds it. He watches your eyes roll back, your hands clutching at his jacket as he continues to press the tips of his fingers into your most sensitive spot.

He returns to your neck, sucking at the sensitive skin and nipping it with sharp teeth before he kisses and licks over the bruises he leaves behind. He applies pressure to your swollen clit with his thumb while relentlessly targeting your spot, an easy task for him thanks to the length of his fingers, and his hold on you tightens when the shaking in your legs grows more intense.

You're so, so close, and Jeongin can tell too– not just from how your pussy pulses and squeezes around his fingers, but because he can hear the loud, erratic thumping of your heart, as well as the rush of blood pulsing in your veins. "C'mon, let go– cum, you can do it, cum for me," he urges, speaking softly against the shell of your ear while swirling his thumb over your clit.

"There you go, good girl, just like that," he praises as you string out a loud succession of whimpers, your thighs closing tight around his hand as your high finally takes you. Your world feels like it’s spinning, your heartbeat ringing in your ears as you ride out your high, your release gushing messily around his fingers.

His hand stays in place until your thighs untense, and he’s careful as he slips his fingers out of you, though you can’t help but shiver and whine from the sensitivity regardless. You're unsteady on your feet following your orgasm, but Jeongin makes sure you don't fall over; he keeps his grip on your firm, carefully helps you turn away from where you were pressed against the carved window to sit in the booth's only seat.

He wipes the sweat from your forehead after you sit, leans down to fix and smooth over the skirt of your church gown as you try your best to collect your breath and calm your racing heart. He's reverted back to his kindly priest persona it seems– you can tell by the warm smile he offers when you look at him, his sharp fangs fully retracted.

Still, bits of your blood remain smeared over his lips– clear evidence that he isn't the saintly man he portrays himself to be. You watch breathlessly as Jeongin licks the last of it from his lips before he pulls back the curtain of the confessional booth.

He offers you his hand after it seems like you've recovered enough to stand again; your own hand trembles as you accept it, and with his assistance, you rise carefully from your seat.

You're a bit dizzy when you stand, equal parts consequence of blood loss and the euphoria still lingering and tingling in your veins, but you're otherwise steady; and he smiles as he squeezes your hand in his, the other coming to rest on the small of your back as you take your first step out of the booth.

"Come back to confession again sometime," Jeongin says with his characteristically deceitful, charming smile, knowing full well that you will. Humans always find the sensation of his venom irresistible, always become addicted to it once they've felt it– and you'll be no different. "I'll be waiting for you."

[supermaks]

Someone needs to write the jhonny herbert x max verstappen enemies to lovers fic... I'm sorry

Literally closest I can get to ur ask I swear but ummm heres a deep dive into herb/max and stewarding in general ig dont u be sorry Im the 1 whos gotta beg ur forgiveness for this because nobody cares u definitely wanted none of this and yet. Heres some chronological quotes some opinions and a lil bit of history and idk love u

Bolded segments just mean that I personally find his wording kinda telling or relevant

"What surprised me was when Max had to let Lewis by he moved over on to the sand, off the racing line. (...) He should have forced Lewis to go on the dirt to pass. That’s what I would have done." - JH on a column for Motorsport Magazine in June, 2021

“I think there is an element that Lewis with experience, that he knows when to pull out, but I love Max, I love what he does on the racetrack, I love what he does behind the wheel. These situations are going to happen. Lewis has done it in the past as well. So it is really going to be down to when you pick your moments to say it is not worth the risk. Maybe it was an over-ambitious move but it had to be made. Max was fully committed, perhaps he should have braked or backed out of the throttle but I doubt there was time, and he wanted the pass." - JH post the Monza 2021 crash.

"I think it just shows what Max is willing to do to try and win this World Championship. (...) Although I love Max because of what he does on the race track, I agree with Lewis, he does really push the limits and sometimes he pushes it too much." - JH to Sky in 2021 after Jeddah 2021.

“You’ve got to be selfish, I think, in any sport in many respects to get the best out of yourself, give yourself those race-winning chances and, of course, championships. That’s why he’s a two-time World Champion. Selfishness is something we’ve seen with Fernando Alonso and Michael Schumacher, Ayrton Senna, Alain Prost, the list goes on. So seeing that sort of situation was a bit of a bad taste in your mouth, but you sort of understand it as a sportsman and a Formula 1 driver.” - JH post Brazil 2022 when Max did not let Checo thru despite team orders.

"He’s got the aggressive style that comes with it and there was always a thing, I remember going back to Senna, many people used to gasp when they saw Senna’s helmet in their mirrors and Max has generated a similar thing that when it’s Max behind you, there is sort of a little bit of attention has to be paid for the overtake that you know is going to be coming your way. But that’s part and parcel of what racing is all about. It’s the mind games that come into play at the same time, that’s something he is very, very strong on. (...) I thoroughly enjoy what I see. I was a little bit critical when he kept having his coming togethers with Lewis, for example, and that’s one part of it where I’m like, 'Just do it pure. You’re so, so good at what you do, just do it in a pure, clean way and just show us why you are the best’. He does that, but he has that slightly aggressive style but it actually makes it entertaining as well and he won’t stop doing it, which is great and he shouldn’t stop doing it because I think we all love what he does. - JH to SI in 2023

"I think he's already there as one of the best we've seen. (...) I think with Max to me there is a wow factor. Whatever you think of Max with his elbows out type of racing, that's part of racing to be honest. It's not my style but that really doesn't matter. Because what he actually does with a racing car sometimes is pretty unbelievable. (...) Max will become better than Lewis Hamilton, Lewis was better than Michael Schumacher and Schumacher was better than Senna. It just evolves. - JH in 2023

"It is deliberate which is why I use the word intimidation where he goes to the very limits without getting himself in trouble. But he has always had this in his history. (...) He is a hard racer. He is very, very hard to beat. He intimidates everybody. That intimidation is something that Lewis, Schumacher, and Senna, have always done. I like competition because I think it is a very important part of racing. But I sometimes don’t like it when he gets to the point that you are actually forcing a car off the circuit. That is not what it is all about. It is about placing the car. He does place the car very well, but he just has that tendency to put everyone else in a position which goes beyond the drivers’ unwritten code. That is what we saw in Austria. (...) Will it change his mindset? Probably not. No driver before, like Michael Schumacher, never changed their approach. And I don’t want him to. I find it really exciting. It is just when he gets to that point, he can only blame him. It was very clear to everyone, he would not change his stripes. - JH on Austria 2024 10 sec pen vs Lando

"That showed Max’s rebellious streak. I love that side of him, it is what makes Max, Max, his honest and outspoken character." - JH after giving Max community service for swearing and Max held his own press conference post Singapore 2024

"He’s very worldly. He’s very open to chat about anything and you have a really nice conversation with him. So he was very understanding. He did his outside press conference himself and everything else but that’s good, because that’s part of the character, and the character is something we don’t want to lose. That’s Max. If he was here today, you’d have a bloody good chat with him." - JH post the 20 second penalty in Mexico 2024

Heres an opinion piece from 2021 titled 'Written rules for racing shouldn't exist' — Johnny Herbert. His whole chest honey. Just a taste but pls read the whole thing

Written rules for racing shouldn’t exist, because aggression is part of it and always has been. (...) There’s another word: intimidation. You get drivers who have a persona for being extreme in this regard – but what’s wrong with it? (...) But rules for racing is simply not what it should be about. I know Formula 1 has a driver steward, in this case Derek Warwick who has normally been good at allowing racing to happen, [AN: LMFAOOOO iykyk] and I’ve been the driver steward in the past too. (...) Consistency from corner to corner is also difficult. Remember Turn 3 with Charles and Max in 2019, when Max dived down the inside, took the line and that forced Charles to run wide? That was deemed okay and Max won the race. Very clever from Max. Did he delay steering right a little? Probably. Did he lean on him on the exit? Yes. Good racing. But at Turn 4, it’s a penalty. (...) I feel a reset is required and the drivers have to be involved. I’d get rid of rules for racing and ask drivers if it is acceptable or not. Let them race and sort it out between them. If they go off the track taking the outside line, that was the risk they took. 

Ok I've gone on unhinged rants about herb before I'll try to like take him more seriously here and try to really understand tf his deal is. Lets inspect the initial quotes for a sec.

Theres common elements over the years. Relentless comparisons to other aggressive drivers 'of a different time' ((two in particular)) the word 'intimidation', the acknowledgement of skill, the idealization of 'old school' racing as what Max is able to produce and like a lil bit of an idealization of Max himself. Like . Like me. Like a verstappie. Like 'Max is Max' type of shit we do yk, but whereas somebody like T Krav wud be a lil venomous in tone Herbert is like kicking his feet and giggling but also while holding a sniper rifle aimed directly at Maxs head.

So the whole Max Vershmacher thing. Lets kick that door right open ok. Johnny Herbert was Schumachers teammate and he didnt have a good time. Hes talked about it a lot, how tough it was to always be outpaced, outranked, to feel like he didnt have the team like Michael had the team, like he never got a real shot, even tho he recognizes realistically he wud have lost anyway. ((I'm not saying I believe everything he says, but Im not gonna invalidate how he felt)) So when he compares Max wid Schumacher, hes not just like comparing Max to somebody he raced against, but to a teammate he lost to. Badly. He knows how Michael operates, how Michael drives, those 'mind games', that 'intimidation', those were things he cud not replicate. Where Michael thrived, and continued to thrive wid the people he then took to Ferrari, Herbert failed. Michael created an environment where his 'over-aggression', his 'tactics', his 'selfishness', built him up as 1 of the best of all time, and Max is doing the same, in a completely different formula 1, under a different rule book, in different cars, against a different grid. So while Herbert recognizes Max's craft is ruthless, but intelligent, and precious, hes fed up wid that shit lmfao. No bitch hes HAD it wid some guy wid an weird accent and a temper and a team under his thumb being a cunt on track because he knows how the game is played and he knows how to throw his dice first.

Now Herbert is in a room where he actually has power over him. He can ask Max to battle in a 'pure' way, like he did in that Sports Illustrated interview, as if an actual battle for a world title between 2 machines wid significant pace difference between them can or shud be anything remotely close to 'pure'. Because when people saw Sennas helmet in their mirrors and raced him different that was iconic, the mark of a true racer, real racing, like Herbert said, but wid Max, now, when he defends not just his position, but his title, his name, its profane, its not allowed, and he needs to repent for it. He needs to be punished. Worst part of this to me is that Herbert kinda knows he can do shit like he did in Mexico because Max wont be affected by it. Max wont change. Michael never changed.

A lil bit of history because this is my house. Former drivers only began acting as stewards in 2010. Jean Todt did it as an experiment in response to criticism about 'inconsistency'. 😐😐😐😐 Girl I know just let me remind u they didnt have the halo until 2018. Ok

Until 2010 sometimes u had a whole panel of stewards without any driving experience, and theres plenty u can google about controversial stewarding calls during that time. Herbert was one of the first f1 drivers to act as a steward. So was Prost, and Mansell. Cool. Now lets do a simple exercise. Damon Hill was appointed a steward while Schumi was still driving. Do u think there was anything inconsistent or even perhaps .. controversial about any of those races. Just an example. Ur nodding. We're all nodding

Obvi having actual drivers weight in on decisions regarding motor racing is step forward, wanna make that clear. But these men's contribution to the panel is affected by whatvr the fuck happened during their time as racing drivers, is influenced by their own perception of the racers in question, or the track, or their literal subjective interpretation of the Driving Standard Guidelines. Lets not even get into these Guidelines bro I've called Max an old testament god but literally bar for BAR the bitch is in there

Theres no magical solution for somebody like Herbert and how he behaves when it comes to Max, except maybe holding his hand when hes about to put 20 seconds on dudes head for a 2nd penalty that shud be 5 and being like hey. U just gave him community service for saying a bad word. Have u eaten today, some water, lets go outside. People will point to other stewards and be like but they're biased too, and its like, yuh, thats part of the game. Thats part of F1. All of this shit is bananas AND F1.

Herberts lastest compliment to Max which came attached to a bunch of other damage control was 'worldly'. He has called Max clever, smart, rebellious, exciting, dangerous, intimidating, selfish, and Max. Just Max. 'Max is Max', somebody else said, and that was enough because he understood. That person was Max's teammate once. Maybe Herbert also understands, because of his former teammate. His teammate's name is enough too.

The whole community service thing, this latest penalty, the frankly shocking things he said about how he saw Austria. Maybe this was some form of retaliation for COTA, maybe it was just normal Herbert escalation. He wants Max tamed. He wants Max gentled, mostly because he knows, again, he has said this, multiple times, that its futile to try. U want a herbert/max f1c I'll give u that. A 60 year old mans constant and relentless attempts to stifle a 20 something year old he cant control because it means he gets to c him remain defiant. Herb gets to c him walk into the one room that he controls, and remain uncontrollable. Maybe he will refuse to answer questions and hold his own presser outside, but thats part of his character and the character is something we dont want to lose. Not again.

[theloveinc]

My OC kids with Bakugo are always just newborns lmao

if it fits the plot you've got going in your daydream, then that's totally fine!!!

...IS WHAT I WANT TO SAY (and is true too). but also i'm so !!! because ARG i'm also kinda wondering why??? ig it makes sense to me that not everyone thinks about like... domestic stuff after the beginning of the happy end, but still. if kids aren’t off the table altogether, this makes me wanna design u a kid LOL bc newborns grow up eventually too, and having any kind of kid with bakugo is bound to be at least a little... wild.

but as long as ur daydreams are still good... i'm still happy for u hehehe!

[inkskinned]

"don't make it political!" .... what proportion of death and suffering must occur before politics are involved. if this isn't political, what is even the point of any politics, ever. of democracy. the words are "by the people for the people." if i am going to be left alone by my elected representatives to "figure it out" - to undergo damage, hardship, fear. what the fuck did i elect them for. what was their job. the entire point is that they handle this shit. this is why we were supposed to be electing leaders.

poverty is political. misogyny is political. gun control is political. climate change is political. how much aid a community gets is political. what the fuck are you talking about. it's been political this whole fucking time.

[emsinof]

hello tumblr can you hear me…..

i’m emsinof on dnptwt but they get very angry over there if you talk about sex so i’m seeking refuge on dnp tumblr for the first time in 6 ish years???? (i used to be here many moons ago)

i’m rusty with how tumblr works and it’s been a hot minute since i’ve used this app consistently but i know you guys will match my freak 🙂‍↕️

a little about me: im 23, lesbian, from the uk, my pronouns are she/her <33 i write a little here and there and sometimes make art !! im freaky about sister daniel and i still haven’t recovered from dnpc slime……

excited to be here and make friends :’)))

[arsenicflame]

Izzy's never had any social media- why the fuck would he?- but there is a facebook account out there with his name, made for him by Ed back in the days when it was the hot new thing, and everyone had to have a facebook account. Theres a sum total of three posts on there;

The first two, made when Ed opened the account, marking that he changed his profile picture (Ed's favourite of them, armoured in leather but grinning at each other, full of love, like theres nothing else that matters in the world), and that Ed changed his relationship status now Izzy has an account- "Edward Teach is married to Izzy Hands"

The only other post, made more than a decade later, is Ed changing his relationship status to single.

[botlabyrinth]

the percy jackson tv show is actually great when there isn’t a little shit in your ear telling you it’s not “book accurate”

[crescentfool]

souyo x splatoon!

[jrueships]

Bought one of my lil nephew giannis shoes for his birthday bcs he loves giannis and these are some of the ugliest fucking things I have ever laid my eyes on in my life. anyways it's his bday today so i gave them to him. but they are so ugly. he loves them

[kazumasougi]

im gonna be real for a second. if fantasy can only be enjoyable to you when removed from any and all real world implications then is it even good

[nyaagolor]

Headcanon that I’d like to see drawn by someone actually good at art: magalor is a chronic thief, he steals any little trinket he can get his hand on, he just saw the master crown as the ultimate trinket to steal, also he has a little clear plastic box with everything he has stolen in it, most of the time it’s stuff people wouldn’t even notice is gone, like like Kirby’s spare star pillow, (if you’ve already gotten this ignore me, I wasn’t sure if it went through properly)

Smth smth cat burglar

[tequatls-favorite-spoon]

my art from the na vs art party!! took me a lil bit cuz i wanted to color it and that meant cleaning up the sketches and then i wanted to shade them and hajsksldhaflk

the characters from left to right:

Quinn Teeling - @sunsrefuge

Ambrose Wolfsbane - @commander-gloryforge

Finnegän - @pinecone-enthusiast

Astrëllä - @ohpollenpowder

[fjordfolk]

Hello, I was just wondering if you could share more about the kind of training and preparation you did with your girls at home/on shorter walks to get them ready for long hikes. And out of curiosity, what were the traits you looked for in potential breeds/puppies to suit long hikes? 💜

Oof, I wish I had a good and technical system to present here, but the truth is that we live in a rural part of Norway where nothing is flat unless it was dug out and the asphalt cracks so fast the main roads count as mild terrain, so a lot of it just comes with the territory.

From early on I've pretty much just tried to let them learn and grow as naturally as possible and to not limit them too much, and all of our puppies have been active and come on short hikes since they were ~3 months old. Not like heavy, static, structured activity - but little off-trail mountain or forest treks focused on play and exploration. Shaping the dog I want from the start, basically.

Our activity levels fluctuate with the season and weather, so we only do really long hikes in the summer and early autumn. But it's not unusual to spend 3-4hrs going mostly uphill on a regular walk, so doubling that for a hike isn't that big of an ask as long as they're healthy and in good base condition. And once hiking season starts rolling around in June after eight months of snow/sleet/rain, I'm usually in worse shape than my dogs anyway lol. I know my dogs well and we start the season with a few warmup hikes, to see where we're all at.

As far as breeds go, idk. I just tend to like a relatively neutral, balanced build. I'm not personally into very large or heavy dogs. I appreciate a little athleticism. I want less prey drive and more handler orientation. The ideal dog for me is one that maybe doesn't Have To, but Can and Wants To. Over the years I've also learned that I like a little moderation in body and angulation, and I prefer a slightly careful dog over an overconfident one.

[orcelito]

Don't know whether it's a product of my upbringing or just part of who I am, but I really do tend to shrug off things that seem to send others into massive guilt spirals. Like, what's the point? Either you meant to do it or you didn't. If you meant to do it but regret it now, make what amends you can & resolve to do better, then move on. If you didn't mean to, be honest about it, apologize if need be, & try to do better. Then move on.

Beating yourself up truly serves no purpose. What are we, catholic? If there is a god, I truly don't think they'd care, anyways

[starlooove]

“They need to drop a show about the toxic sketches” y’all couldnt handle that rose quartz wasnt a good person

[star-mum]

had an argument with my sister on the ride home from my friend's :-: