#all those who wander

[fiadorable]

For the three word prompt thing, Una and Chris, #6 or #23 please!

#6 for Pikeuna: Be gentle, please. Number One checks on Pike after the events of "All Those Who Wander".

As captain, Chris' quarters had the most and best viewports on the ship, and he kept them open as much as possible. "It's why we're up here, isn't it," he'd said one night, fingers trailing shivery patterns up her spine as they lay tangled in his sheets. "To be among the stars."

Tonight, every viewport was shuttered.

Number One stepped far enough into Chris' quarters for the doors to close behind her, and then stopped. The lights were off, the main section of the room lit only by an aging fire crackling in the fireplace. A glint of light reflecting off a squat glass bottle on the coffee table caught her eye, drawing her gaze to the couch. As her eyes adjusted, the lumpy form occupying it gradually took shape as a supine Chris.

"Captain?" she asked, squinting.

"What do you need, Number One?" Chris' voice was rough and papery, and punctuated with the sharp clink of a glass being set on the floor.

Number One clasped her hands behind her back. "Permission to enter?"

His silence siphoned the air from the room, her lungs, had her pulse pounding in her ears and her palms sweating. Her thoughts spun back to the dizzying, tense moment on the bridge earlier when his shuttle wasn't at their rendezvous point. She'd sent a scout shuttle down to the surface to report in, the minutes without contact ticking by like a cord winding tighter and tighter around her chest.

"Granted," Chris finally rasped.

Number One unclenched her jaw and let her arms fall to her sides. She approached the couch with soft, deliberate steps. There was a little space on the cushion near his feet. She sat, resting a hand on his blanket-covered knee.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asked.

"No," he said. "Do you?"

Number One shook her head. "No, I would very much like to not talk for a while."

Chris shifted from his back to his side, pushing her toward the edge of the cushion with his foot. "C'mere."

She rose and resettled in the curve created by his upper body. Her palm skimmed his arm, followed the arc of his shoulder down to the warm dampness on his cheek.

Lifting his hand, he traced the full curve of her lower lip with the pad of his thumb. His palm cradled her cheek.

Number One covered his hand with hers. She kissed his wrist, and then helped him stand, leading him toward the sleeping alcove. Here, the viewports above his bed were open, blanketing the room in a dim silver. Stars crawled past as the ship towed its precious, broken cargo.

When her shins knocked the foot of his bed frame, she turned, hands rising to press against his chest.

Chris' arms encircled her waist, tugged her body close to his until their foreheads were touching and their breath mingled between them like a fog.

He was here. He was alive. His heart beat a furtive tattoo beneath her palms.

Here. Alive. Heart beating.

Gasping, her, when his hands rucked up her uniform and undershirt in one move, trailing fire across her skin.

Groaning, him, when she dragged her fingernails through the thicket of silver hair at the nape of his neck.

"Please," she whispered, nosing his face upward. Pressing her lips to his, hard. No, that felt wrong. He tensed. Number One softened the kiss. Gentle, her feathery kiss to his upper lip said. I'll be gentle.

Chris melted into her embrace. She guided him down to the bed, then removed her boots. The viewport controls were on his side of the bed. She walked over, touched her fingertips to the prompt that would lower the shades.

From the bed, Chris looked up at her with glassy, questioning eyes before darkness reclaimed the room. Number One crawled into the bed, cradled his body with her own. "It's why we're up here together, isn't it? To be among each other when the stars are too bright."

One hundred thousand apologies for the late response to your prompt, @lindsaybob. This one needed to steep in my WIP pile for a few months. 😅

just like lindsay, you, too, can try your luck and send me a prompt and a pairing

[unknownfacelessfanfictions]

North Star

Pairing: Hemmer x Reader Fandom: Star Trek: Strange New Worlds Words: 2.7K Warnings: Discussion of injuries and death, spoilers for "All those who wander" Summary: The North Star is the brightest star in the constellation of the Little Bear. It shows sailors the way and gives them the reassurance that they are on the right course. A/N: I have written this piece in anger and protest regarding his death. He is alive

You had been aware from the beginning that this could be a possibility. You had always known that one day you might get the notification from sickbay that something had gone wrong. You had known that life in Starfleet was fraught with danger and that the next day could always be the last. You had both been aware of the risks and still agreed that they were worth it. However, that didn't change the fact that your heart was now pounding in your throat and adrenaline was coursing through your system as you sprinted down the corridors.

It should have been a simple mission. Perhaps simple was an understatement, The team, consisting of most of the senior staff as well as Cadets Uhura, Chia and the newly promoted Lieutenant Duke, including your boyfriend, were to respond to the distress signal from the USS Peregrine and rush to the rescue. While not without danger, nothing had indicated anything worse. Hemmer had even been almost pleased when he was told that Valeo Beta V was an ice planet.

But now you were walking down the corridor, ignoring the stares of the other crew members, as if your life depended on it. Not even a minute before, you had received a message from Doctor M'Benga that made the blood run cold in your veins. It wasn't long, but it was enough. "Please report to the infirmary. Something has gone wrong on the mission. It's about Hemmer."

Your heart was pounding and you felt numb as you took one step in front of the other, unable to feel or perceive anything except your pounding heart and the horrible thoughts floating around in your head that seemed to get worse with each passing second. Slithering, you turned the corner and came to a breathless halt outside the doors of the infirmary, where Doctor M'Benga and the Captain seemed to be waiting. They were engaged in conversation, but fell instantly silent when M'Benga saw you.

"Where is he?" M'Benga approached you, his face contorted in sympathy, and your stomach turned. No, please don't. "Lieutenant. I want you to try-" "Where's Hemmer?!" Panic took over your body and you felt yourself begin to tremble, not even caring that you had interrupted your superior officer. "Is he hurt? Is he even alive?! Please, let him be alive, please-"

"Lieutenant, please calm down. Hemmer is alive." Pike had stepped forward and placed a hand on your shoulder reassuringly. "He's hurt, but he'll live." A sob of relief escaped you, which you immediately tried to stifle with your hand. Pike smiled sympathetically and gently stroked your shoulder before removing his hand. "However, we, or rather Doctor M'Benga, wanted to talk to you first before we let you see him. To prepare you, so to speak, for what to expect."

This idea didn't really appeal to you as all you wanted was to simply be with Hemmer, however you knew you couldn't avoid it and nodded slightly in agreement. "Please, follow me." The doors opened and M'Benga led you through the infirmary to his office and no matter how much you surreptitiously looked around for it, you couldn't spot Hemmer. In his office, M'Benga sat down in his chair and motioned for you to sit down as well, which you reluctantly did.

"How familiar were you with the mission?" Frustrated, you breathed in and out. All you wanted was to go to Hemmer. Was that too much to ask? Still, you answered dutifully. "A team was beamed down to Valeo Beta V to respond to the distress signal from the USS Peregrine. The crew did not respond to the calls, so the team was told to go down to check on them. As far as I know, the team consisted of Lieutenant Kirk, Captain Pike, Lieutenant Spock, Lieutenant Noonien Singh, Lieutenant Duke, Cadet Uhura and Cadet Chia, Nurse Chapel, you and Hemmer."

M'Benga nodded. "When we arrived at the planet and at the ship we found that the entire crew had been killed. Some were frozen to death, some ripped to shreds." He was silent for a moment. "It were the Gorn. There were two survivors, a girl and a stranger who could not make us understand his name. He was infected and carried Gorn eggs, which hatched and killed him in the process." You felt sick and felt like throwing up. "What do you know about the Gorn and their reproduction?" You had to swallow, not liking the direction this conversation was taking.

"Not much. They usually use other people as carriers, plant their eggs in them and wait for them to hatch, at which point the carrier of the eggs dies. Once a person carries the eggs inside them, it's irreversible, at least up to present day." M'Benga nodded again. "We have found that the poison that each Gorn has is the way to be infected with the eggs." He was silent for a moment and then looked at you. "Hemmer was hit by the poison to protect Cadet Uhura."

You had to pull yourself together not to let the horrified cry be heard as you slapped your hand over your mouth. "You said that he survived! That he was going to live! No one has ever survived anything like that," you sobbed, squeezing your eyes shut. Try as you might to convince yourself that Hemmer would never do such a thing, you knew better. No matter how grumpy and dismissive Hemmer always pretended to be, he had a soft core and a huge heart. And if it was Uhura who had grown very close to his heart in the last few months, even if he would never admit it, you knew he would not hesitate to throw himself between her and danger.

"Until Hemmer." M'Benga leaned forward and put his hand on yours in an attempt to reassure you. "Gorn can't stand cold, which is why we were able to use cold to slow down the acceleration process. And well, we still have the pattern buffer, huh?" Your gaze darted to the chair in his room where the transporter was installed. " Which means..." "We were able to find a cure in time. However, it was quite advanced, so he didn't come away entirely unscathed. We weren't able to reverse some of the scars." "But he's alive?"

While you had been told several times by now, you really wanted to be sure, lest you receive a gruesome revelation. M'Benga smiled gently. "Yes, he is alive. However, he is still resting." "Is he awake?" "Awake enough to complain about the blankets." A tearful laugh escaped you and you wiped the tears from your cheek.

Hemmer, being from Andoria, was often too warm on the ship, so he didn't need blankets. Unfortunately, Hemmer could not sleep without the feeling of the light weight of a blanket, testimony to his life in an environment where he had needed that, which is why you had given him a cooling blanket for his last birthing day. It felt like any other blanket, but it cooled the body instead of warming it. Hemmer hadn't slept with anything else since then.

"Can I talk to him?" M'Benga nodded his head slightly. "As long as you don't kill him." "No promises." He laughed slightly and shook his head, however his reply was serious. "Don't be too exuberant. He still needs rest, I don't even know if he might have gone back to sleep." You stood up. "I don't care about that. I ..." Embarrassed, you looked to the side. "I just need to see him to really know that ..." "... that he's okay," M'Benga finished your sentence, looking at you sympathetically. "I understand." He too rose. "Follow me."

No longer as upset as before, but still with your heart pounding, you followed the doctor to a partitioned off area with rapidly raised walls that created a small room of your own. "The captain ordered it. To give him enough privacy." Chapel stepped out of the room and gave you a tight, sympathetic smile before placing her hand on your shoulder and giving it a quick squeeze. "There's nothing wrong with him. However, I can't promise he's very talkative right now, let alone awake." "It's okay," you hastened to reply, your target now within reach. "I just need to see him." Chapel and M'Benga gave each other a knowing look and she and M'Benga left you, with the note to just call out if there was a problem.

For a moment you stood in front of the non-transparent, raised walls and tried to collect yourself before you stepped forward, pushed the door aside, closed it behind you and turned towards the room. It wasn't very big and quite sparsely furnished, but you didn't care. Your focus was on the large white bed on which, in a nest of blankets and pillows, Hemmer lay, apparently deep in sleep. You slapped your hand over your mouth in horror. "Oh God."

Hemmer looked paler than usual and his antennae hung in his face, which was not usual for him. His hair was messy and slightly filthy and his face and hands, which were lying on the blanket, were covered in small wounds and scrapes. Why they had not been treated you did not know, though you guessed that M'Benga had had bigger problems. What really caught your attention, and was probably the bigger problem, was the scar tissue that ran from his neck and throat up to the cheekbones of the right side of his face.

Like grey-dark purple veins, the scars stretched across his neck and jaw until they ran down his face and disappeared towards his cheekbone. His right hand also seemed to be affected, but not as badly as his neck, which is why you suspected that part of his jacket had protected him. However, the clothing did not seem to be completely protective, as a thick bandage wrapped around his middle.

Shocked and close to tears at the painful sight of the person you loved, you stood in the corner not knowing what to do. Slowly you approached and let your fingers ghost over his wounds without touching them and a quiet sob escaped you. "Oh Hemmer..." Tears ran down your face and dripped onto his face, so you turned, hoping to get your emotions under control.

"Nasty, isn't it? Mind you, M'Benga said it didn't get any prettier." At the sound of the voice you whirled around to see the Aenar turn his head in your direction, open his eyes slowly, not that it would make any difference, and smile slightly but pained. "Oh my god Hemer." Your sobs were lost in the room as you rushed towards him and wrapped your arms around him, only to let him go instantly as his groans of pain reached your ears. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." was all you could get out crying and gently put your hand to the uninjured side of his face.

"You're alive, oh my God you're fine." You ran your hand over and over again over his cheek, through his hair and gently pressed kiss after kiss over his face, your tears wetting not only your face but his as well. "Well, I wouldn't call it fine..." grumbled Hemmer, but interrupted himself when another sob escaped you. His gaze softened and he straightened, despite your tear-stained protests, to feel for your face with his uninjured hand. "Hey. It's all right. I'm alive, I'm safe, it's all good."

His voice was impossibly soft and loving, which brought you to tears even more before he sighed and gently pulled you against him into a hug. Another thing he would never admit, but Hemmer loved hugs more than anything. Sometimes you spent entire evenings just lying in each other's arms and enjoying the silence.

"I thought you were dead." Your voice was nothing more than a choked, hoarse whisper, however, you knew Hemmer had heard you because of the tightening of his grip around you. "When M'Benga contacted me and said something had gone wrong and it was about you... I thought I had lost you. I thought that when I entered the infirmary, I would see your body lying before me, ready for burial. If there had been a corpse left."

Hemmer gently pressed a kiss against your temple. "I am here. I'm alive. It's all right." Slowly the grief in you dried up and was replaced by anger that made you pull away from him so that he could sink back into his pillows with a pain-filled hiss.

"Damn it, Hemmer, nothing's okay. You almost died today! We almost lost you! I know you wanted to protect Uhura because you loved her, but did you think for a moment how we all might feel if something happened to you?! Spock, M'Benga, the captain? The guilt of those who were with you on the mission and couldn't have saved you? The guilt Uhura would have felt because you threw yourself in front of her as a living shield? Did you think about how horrible it would be for her to have to live with your death?! Maybe you haven't noticed Growler, but the little one cares about you and is fond of you too."

Hemmer started to say something, but you hadn't finished letting out your frustration and fear and panic of the last few minutes. "And what about me? Have you ever thought how I would have felt if you were suddenly gone?! Damn it, Hemmer, I love you! More than anything else in my life and more than I've ever loved anyone!!!" Your voice became quieter, taken over by sadness, and again tears came to your eyes. Against your scolding, you let your head fall against his shoulder and gently Hemmer put an arm around you as hot tears streamed down your face again. "Damn it, Hemmer. Do you really think I could live with myself? That I could just get over you and move on with my life?"

"You had a life before me." Hemmer's voice sounded strained and you could swear that his body was trembling too. "Maybe. But now I know how colourless it has been after all. All my life I've longed for the stars and you..." You straightened up and slowly let your finger run over his cheekbone. "You are my brightest star. My north star, my Polaris. My anchor, my safe haven and the fixed point of my existence that always accompanies me, never leaves me and always shows me the way home." Astonished and somewhat shocked, you noticed that tears were gathering in his eyes and gently you wiped them aside. "I would be lost without you, Hemmer."

"How can you still love me?" Hemmer looked at you in disbelief while tears actually ran down his cheeks. There were not as many as yours, but enough to alarm you. You had never seen Hemmer cry before. "I am disfigured and M'Benga does not know if I will ever be able to move as I did before. I may have to resign my commission from Starfleet." "Then I'll come with you." The words escaped you before you could think about them, yet you didn't regret them. After all, they were true. You'd been together for years and you were pretty sure you could never be with anyone else.

"I don't care if you are the chief engineer or retired. I don't care if you can move normally or if you are in a wheelchair. I don't care if you have scars or not, because you are beautiful and the scars are just a testament to what kind of person you are. A peaceful, thoughtful, self-sacrificing, compassionate and selfless person who puts their own well-being below that of others." You gently put your arms around him.

"I love you because you are you. Not because you have a high rank or are attractive, which however is valued. I love you because you are selfless, because you care for others, even if you sometimes have problems showing it. I love you because although you have a hard shell, your core is all the softer and your heart all the bigger. I love you."

Hemmer pulled you closer to him. "You are insane. Completely insane." You smiled slightly and rested your head on his shoulder. "That makes two of us." You didn't know what to expect, however, you were sure of one thing. Hemer was your North Star, your firm hold and no matter what would happen and where life would take you, you would get through it. Together.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

@bigblissandlove1

@akamitrani

@moonlightshaiku

@indignantlemur

[unknownfaceless-ds9]

I've watched "All Those Who Wander"........

How FUCKING Dare they?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! They KILLED him!!!! They FUCKING KILLED HIM!!!!!

Hemmer was literally one of the best and interesting characters Star Trek created in almost two decades!!!!!! And they just KILLED him!!!!

I am FUCKING MAD RIGHT NOW!!!! And if they think, I will accept that for possible future fics..... FORGET IT!!!!! HE LIVES !!!!!!

[ziriamcaps]

Star Trek: Strange New Worlds | All Those Who Wander

[spockvarietyhour]

Search and Rescue arrive on Valeo Beta V “All Those Who Wander”

[capsfromtrek]

[green5quirrel]

Hemmer Rant

I wanted to write this before I read any other thoughts or comments about Hemmer's character arc in Star Trek Strange New Worlds and before I watched The Ready Room interview with Bruce. So this is done directly after getting home from work. (They haven't even removed their binder, friends!)

Be aware, SPOILER ALERT.

I want to preface this with saying I am neither blind nor do I have a significant vision impairment that isn't corrected with glasses. So I absolutely can't speak to that experience but I do want to speak to what I feel was a flawed character arc for our chief engineer.

Additionally, forgive any ignorance I've expressed in my wording or perspective. Please feel free to correct me.

Bruce was, as interviews have said, told clearly about his character arc before he took on the role as Hemmer. And if he had to die, he said, he wanted it to be a cool death. And as far as death's go cinematically, it was pretty cool. What wasn't cool (in my opinion) is that the writers and creators had to do it at all.

Historically people with disabilities have lacked autonomy in their characters and stories. Yes, Hemmer was not considered disabled but he was played by an actor open about his vision impairment and advocacy and this was touted in articles as something revolutionary in the Star Trek universe. "Star Trek's first legally blind actor!"

Thus, I believe this character still has fallen to a common trope, sacrificing his own character development to be a bolster for another character's development. In this case, that character was Uhura.

The thing is, there was potential for Hemmer to be a fully drawn and realized character. He had a past we all wanted to know about. He had intrigue. He was played fully by a brilliant actor who had the experience to do so. But his story was sacrificed, quite literally, to fulfill the development of another character. That is the trope. That is where his autonomy was abandoned. His existence was in service to an able bodied character and only that. He was to inspire Uhura to stay in Starfleet and on the Enterprise by giving up his life.

Star Trek has done so well bringing marginalized characters into stories and integrating them without fanfare and with pure acceptance. I think they failed miserably with planning this character's arc.

Hemmer is the blind prophet (a terribly annoying trope but unavoidable considering the history of the Aenar cannon). Hemmer's development is only seen when in service of abled body people around him (a fact they worked into the very fabric of his personality by never allowing him to grow past only being useful in fixing but also useful as a fully autonomous person FOR HIMSELF). Hemmer dies tragically as an inspiration. The representation was almost there. It was so close. It could have been SO GOOD. But Star Trek bowed to cliché. It bowed to the popular media motif for disabled people. And perhaps it didn't do so knowingly, but it is a genuine shame that Hemmer had to die without having explored him beyond a prop for furthering another character's story.

If it had been any other type of alien that didn't represent a disabled population perhaps it would be better. But touting disability representation and then bending to such a disrespectful storyline was such a disappointment to see. Hemmer deserved better. And we deserved to see a disabled representation that didn't end with tragedy as too many so often do in story telling. We still have a lot of work to do.

[asexual-spock]

Promo stills for Strange New Worlds Episode 9 ‘All Those Who Wander’

[okaywhatabouthades]

But sometimes I find myself breathing as if I have never inhaled fresh air before.

Sometimes my insides feels so suffocating that I find myself wishing to rip my skin open, for my soul to flee away.

[ichayalovesyou]

So… About Hemmer

I’ve got very mixed feelings. I do think it was a waste but I also really don’t.

Emotionally, subjectively? We could have had so much more, relationships, Aenar lore, Andorian lore etc. He gave us so much and yet so little at the same time. I would have loved to see much more of him.

Cinematically? It’s incredibly well executed. Even if it leans heavily on a well-loved and worn trope of killing off a mentor when ‘their job is done’. (Although I do think it would’ve been even more of a gut punch had we known him longer, for say, an old school format 20+ episode season.)

I’ve said this a lot when doing meta about Strange New Worlds. The overarching theme of the story thus far overwhelmingly has been about sacrifice, loss, fate, and how to cope with it. This death was planned from the beginning, instead of just being a way for the actor to leave with relative grace. It’s baked into the story SNW has been weaving since the pilot.

It makes perfect sense that someone would die near the end of the season to nail that message home. Most of the crew has pre-written fates, the only ones who don’t have that protection are Una, Ortegas, and Hemmer. Hemmer waved his death flag high in Memento Mori.

I genuinely thought he’d die in Memento Mori as soon as he already knew what his purpose was “to fix what is broken”. When he didn’t o hoped I was wrong about him dying at all, but I wasn’t, as it turned out. As much as I would have liked to have been wrong because again, I love him, he was my favorite non-Legacy character of the bunch.

I’ve seen some people angry that Hemmer’s death only happened to serve the story and the character arcs of those who survived. I don’t really get that personally. A well-written death SHOULD serve the narrative and impact those around that character in ways that move the story forward. If they cheaply killed him off in an unceremonious way and the characters did not mourn him, THEN I would’ve been angry.

But he wasn’t, and they almost certainly are grieving and affected by his sacrifice, so I’m not angry, even though I’m upset.

Besides, we didn’t see a body, we only saw him fall, we’ve seen characters survive and/or be revived from worse.

If they wanted to they could say that something or someone caught him, that the freezing temperatures killed the hatchling Gorn inside of him, but not Hemmer himself. The planet is mentioned to be very similar to Andoria. Hemmer could survive as indefinitely on that world as a human with decent survival training could survive in an Earth environment.

He could be alive without anyone knowing. Just like how another running theme of SNW has been that things are not always as they seem. Like the Tolkien quote the title is inspired by, “not all those who wander are lost”.

My one hope is that they don’t immediately replace him with Scotty, at least not as Chief Engineer (yet!). I would really like to meet more non-Legacy characters whose fates aren’t already charted for us. Although if they wanted to introduce him as a Lieutenant under the next Chief’s tutelage, I could certainly enjoy that.

Regardless of that

Here’s to Hemmer 🥃 he will be missed.

[strangenewfeels]

I got to All Those Who Wander in my rewatch.

AAAAAAAHHHH do you ever watch something casually and then rewatch it and think, why didn't this press all my buttons the first time around?! Because it's practically engineered to do so!!

Spock suddenly can't find he cope with his emotions! And loses it! And Christine talks him down! But he storms off, radiating hurt... Poor baby... Rather large, strong, dangerous, superintelligent baby...

Also rage!Spock very sexy yes please, and indeed build-up-to-rage!Spock. All the leather. Very good look, 11/10. Christine in leather too. Yes good yes. Nice matching pair.

Give me ALL the repressed smouldery glaring.

[azertyrobaz]

That’s not how linguistics works!

[captaincrusher]

Protective gear in The Cage and SNW: All those Who Wander.

[curator-on-ao3]

I feel like fandom needs to talk more about the absolute delight that was the reveal of Christopher Pike’s command codes.

[wheelybard]

It’s funny cos we know Andoria is an ice planet, so imagine if Hemmer’s completely okay. The eggs die and he just gets up.

“Hemmer to Enterprise, can you pick me up?”

[scientific-tricorder]

I'm not the only one bothered by Strange New Worlds' portrayal of the Gorn, so I come with a proposed solution: we haven't actually seen any Gorn yet in Strange New Worlds.

We see Gorn ships in "Memento Mori", but only any 'Gorn' in "All Those Who Wander". However, I say that, maybe, the 'Gorn' from "All Those Who Wander" actually aren't Gorn, but rather the Gorn equivalent of dogs or targs: nonsapient animal pets.

The aliens in "All Those Who Wander" are quadrupedal, whereas all other portrayals of the Gorn have shown them as bipedal. Now, it isn't impossible that a species would switch from one to the other over the course of its lifecycle, but it's rather unlikely, given the many structural changes that come with bipedalism. The whole parasite method of reproduction also contradicts earlier canon from Into Darkness, according to Memory Alpha, wherein the Gorn give live birth. Additionally, the aliens are hyper-violent and any given 'litter' only has one survivor as they fight for dominance - behavior that would be highly counterproductive to any species coordinated and cooperative enough to achieve space travel.