#also I have on-and-off wrist problems I can't afford to care for

[liedownquisition]

SO,

which of those fics you’re hiding away appeals to you the most?

AND, what do you believe are the specific obstacles between you and figuring out how to finish it? if it’s a lack of foundation, what specifically is lacking in the foundation? if it needs more research, what would you need to research? if you’re not in the right mindspace anymore for the story you were telling, how has your mindset matured between then and now?

I think this is the first time I've had a legitimate and decent question in a really long time and honestly for that I'm going to give you a bit more information than you asked for bcs you've given me and Excuse.

First off, I'm going to give you info abt more than one, bcs asking which one "appeals" to me the most is like asking me to pick a favorite child, specifically the ones I have the most regrets about:

(This got super long I'm sorry)

(FE3H) A Study in Late-Onset Emotional Responsiveness - This is abt Byleth but in particular abt their response to *spoiler*'s death from a 3rd person perspective. I favor GD so it's from Claude's. The reason this makes the list is bcs while it's not as large as some of the other fics, it has what I think is one of my absolute best written little idk, metaphor isn't exactly what I'm looking for, but there's a poetry to it that just, I think it's good. I think it's real good.

(PJO) Love and Dying, Per the Sea - Not-really-Percico Hanahaki AU abt overcoming self-destructive loves and growing with it and growing against it. as much as I want to continue it, fandom climate grew in such a way that I was uncomfortable writing for characters in this age bracket/the age range of the target demographic. Also, I'd have to decide if I want to make it have a shippy endgame or not. Which again, Fandom got to be such a way that I got nervous about touching on any of that...

(DCMK) Bindings Between Us - Kaishin fic series centered around books and libraries. DCMK is... a fandom that has always been *good* to my fics and they're the one fandom that I contemplate writing for the most bcs of the validation they give me. This fic I would need to do a lot of research on esp mystery and heist novels since the "prequel" is abt them making sassy comments at each other via book exchange. there are two other prequels that I had ideas for/started to write but there's a decent bit of it that *relies* on the history of the book exchange, for that *and* the sequel. but also just, hm, i feel like outside of the prequel I don't feel as much direction in it (Note, you would not believe how many other DCMK fics I've got plotted out in my gdocs. Major fics even. The biggest roadblock to *all* of them is largely that either they need to be casefics, which I sometimes am not the cleverest at *making* puzzles even if I love solving them, or that there needs to at least be some degree of references to cases/heists to make it work.)

My writing has definitely matured a lot from my DCMK days, and I wonder if I could really manage to not make things... sound like they work together I guess. I like to think my character portrayals have gotten more in-depth and human, but in particular a lot of that means mess. I love mess, but not SOLID mess. like. Dynamic mess where people have flaws and hurt each other but work on it, or sometimes they just accept those flaws are going to hurt but they love someone enough to deal with it bcs it's not toxic - or, sometimes, it is toxic and it's about learning when to leave each other mutually even though it hurts but at least you had each other for a while - enough for it to have been good, enough before it became something bad. People are different and aren't going to agree. It's making the broken pieces of each other fit even though sometimes those pieces really really don't want to.

(TPP) Courtly Affairs - SpaceFae. Just... SpaceFae. The worldbuilding I have tucked away for this mfer that's never going to see the light of day even if I DID finish it is insane. I'm... so far behind on this podcast that I don't think I could do it justice until I do, but it's gotten *harder* for me to focus on them so it's... a lot. Mostly it's that yeah. well, and also a similar thing to the DCMK stuff is that all three of the fics that are supposed to go in this series are Casefics that build to one overhead case and like, that's a lot of interwoven Plot that I have to do just for character development. Lays down.

(NTWEWY) The Art of Living - this was posted as a oneshot, I'm very content with it, it's not my most popular work by a longshot bcs idc how big the fandom is in general but the dynamics that this oneshot covered are so very Niche that most people won't even look twice at it. "But Axel, this is about stuff you haven't written/posted, why are you talking about something you DID?" because, my friend, it was supposed to be multi-part, and I settled. It was supposed to be abt Josh being a shit who does nice things in the meanest way possible and Shoka calling him out and them roasting each other. But, also, about depression, suicidal idealization, and finding reasons to live for yourself and not just for other people. About finding Yourself when you want the people you care about to find You first and make the whole experience easier. It's a bit... raw, and I suppose that makes me nervous. (I also tried to get back into art/drawing with this one, I've got a picture all laid out for the scene but I can't bring myself to finish it.)

(AA) Unnamed LangWrightWorth - I have to confess that this one is actually the least planned out one. At least, not in the way the others are. Like? in the other ones (not counting the oneshot)? I've got several files of JUST notes and keeping track of things and Chapter Breakdowns. this one is just some rough backstory then some word vomit and a vague direction of where I wanna go with it/events I need to happen that I haven't notated outside of that One File. But it's got so much flavor. honestly? I think the biggest obstacle here is my brain is not fixated on this fandom rn.

Now we're in to my most recent fics in my Current Hyperfixation.

(DC/Batfam) Peggy Sue Me for Trying to Make Things Right - Jason Peggy Sue via deus ex machina. He recruits Tim as his civilian confidant and gets more than he bargained for. Most of the terrible stuff is canon in the original timeline with some concept-specific causes. I have arguably about 13+ batfam things but some that I feel more strongly like "oh I wish I could write and share this" and this is one of them. The main reason I do is bcs, well, you would not believe how many batfam fics I've read in the past…. idk, 6 months? I've gone through and read the majority of several major tags. a number of fics I've read more than once. This fic is one I really love the idea of but also am the most afraid of doing bcs there are dynamics in the fandom that I don't quite agree with. I tolerate many of them, but I don't agree with them on a legitimate basis. This fic has some *incredibly specific* dynamics in it, and those dynamics are messy. But, like, Human Messy. These people aren't inherently bad or good but sometimes they are Deeply Wrong about how they interact with each other and what they choose to do no matter how Noble they may try to be. This one is also a lil bit of a case fic. I worry about my ability to keep the plot from dragging as I air out the dirty laundry of every character involved.

(DC/Batfam) Essential Vigilante Guides -Jason Todd-centric. Utilized my highly specific Jason Todd's Bio family backstory that I thought was fun. Jason doesn't have a lot of canon friends from his Robin days and this fic doesn't exactly fix that - it's about him compensating for not having peers of his own by chatting up the only people he is around enough to build a relationship with: Villains. This right here is legitimately THE main fic I was referring to when it comes to having things plotted out to be honest, because each one that I think about maybe possibly sharing just kinda makes the feeling bigger. 3 seven-chapter fics either 3 oneshots or a single collection of those (and possibly other) oneshots to cover some gaps. the biggest issue here? Situations. I know what I want to do with the character dynamics. I know my goals for every single chapter. the problem is keeping it jazzy enough to not be some kind of monotonous "It's this situation again but with new character to interact in it!" Especially the second of the multichapter fics. It's... Big. It's intimidating. I don't have a good track record with multichapter fics/series even if this one is basically a bunch of vaguely linear oneshots set to Theme.

My biggest issue overall? Self-confidence. I've been out of the "posting my writing outside my writing discord where my 1 friend who loves me and everything I do can read it" game for so long that I guess I struggle to see value in my work. I struggle to believe that anyone would be interested in it. And, I know, and I fully support the "write for yourself, not anyone else" but the corollary to that is, admittedly, that if it's not for anyone else then why should I show it to anyone else.

IDK, don't get me wrong I love my friends but sometimes I need more support to push me to finish something, and It's been a struggle that I've fallen short on every time I try to get into a new community that could broker that. Not on the part of the community, but on mine. (no I haven't tried getting into any batfam-adjascent communities. I haven't been active in the DC fandom since... not since I used to RP a fanfic-inspired version of Wally West. And RP communities have gotten so much more intense than they used to be.)

[inkskinned]

you have to go to work so you can pay for your doctor, who is not taking your insurance right now, and if you say i can't afford the doctor's you are told - get a better job. it is very sad that you are unwell, yes, but maybe you should have thought about that before not having a better job.

(where is the better job? who is giving out these better jobs? you are sick, you are hurting - how the hell are you supposed to be well enough for this better job?)

but you go to the doctor because you had the nerve to be hurt or sick or whatever else. and they tell you that it is because you have anxiety. you try your best. you are a self-advocate. you've done the reading (which sometimes pisses them off worse, honestly). you say it is actually adding to my anxiety, it is effecting my quality of life. so they say that you are fat. they say that all young people have this happen to them, isn't it a medical marvel! they say that you should eat more vegetables. they say that you probably just need to lose a little more weight, and that you are faking it for attention.

(what attention could this doctor possibly give? what validation? that's their fucking job, isn't it?)

there is always a hypochondriac, right. someone always tells you about a hypochondriac. or someone who is unnecessarily aggressive during the worst days of their life. or someone looking "for a quick fix". or some idiot who wasn't educated about how to properly care for themselves who just abandons their treatment. and again, the hypochondriac, the overly-cautious hysteric. these people don't deserve to be treated like humans (right), and since you might be one of these people, you also don't get treated like a human. because those people can really fuck with the system, you now have to pay for it. and besides. you're actually probably faking it.

(more often than not, you find a 2:1 ratio of these stories. for every "hypochondriac", there are 2 people who knew something was wrong, and yet nobody could fucking find it. the story often ends with pointless suffering. the story often ends with and now it's too late, and it's going to kill me.)

you are actually just making excuses. someone else got that procedure or that diagnosis and he's fine, you should be fine too. someone else said they watched a documentary about other inspirational people with your exact same condition, maybe you should be inspirational, too. you're just too morbid. your pain and your experience is probably just not statistically concerning. it is all self-reported anyway, and you're just being a baby.

(once, while sitting down in the middle of making coffee, you had the sudden, horrible thought - i could kill myself to make the pain stop. you had to call your best friend after that. had to pet your dog. had to cry about it in the shower. you won't, but that moment - god, fuck. the pain just goes on and on.)

you know someone who went in for routine surgery and said i still feel everything. they told her to just relax. it took her kicking and screaming before they figured out she wasn't lying - the anesthetic drip hadn't been working. you know someone who went in for severe migraines who was told drink water and lose weight. you know someone who was actively bleeding out and throwing up in the ER and was told you're just having a bad period.

in the ER there are always these little posters saying things like "don't wait! get checked today!" and you think about how often you do wait. how often the days spool out. you once waited a full week before seeing the doctor for what you thought was a sprained wrist. it had actually been broken - they had to rebreak it to set it.

but you go into the doctor. the problem you're having is immediate. the person behind the counter frowns and says we're not taking your insurance. you will be paying for this out-of-pocket.

they send you home with tylenol and a little health packet about weight loss or anxiety or attention deficit. on the front it has your birthday and diagnosis. you think about crying, and the words swim. it might as well say go fuck yourself. it might as well say you're a fucking idiot. it might as well say light your money on fire and lie down in it. and the entire fucking time - the problem persists.

it's okay. it's okay, it's just another thing, you think. it's just another thing i have to learn to live with.

[meteormoss]

AAAAAA i think i'm going insane about tcpootw... idk how i haven't found it earlier but i've reread it a few times since yesterday and it still hits. the slice of life vibes are thru the roof and i have never loved reading something that feels so mundane in my life more. it feels like freshly washed laundry in the way that i can really visualize and imagine your writing. the way cleo seems like she's moved on and she's healing with her new friends in her new city contrasted with bdubs still living in the home he remembers he always wanted to leave and the way they were horrible for each other but etho brings them back together for a single week but it's not like anything changes and i'm dying to just hear any thoughts about bdubs after. does he ever find it in him to work through his problems? does he ever talk (or not talk) with joel about it on the porch? or is he forcing himself to deal with it completely alone? is this man actually just going to ignore everything and just miss etho in silence and not talk with cleo and keep walking those trails and trees like they used to and driving an hour to get groceries on a tuesday and not taking care of himself until he breaks just like those bracelets on his wrist?

(also i love a good backstory, if you wanna share how they broke up, if it was fast, if it was expected, if it fell apart like they knew it wasn't going to last, i would appreciate hearing it :D)

AWWWWWWE, Thank you so much!! This fic means so much to me, genuinely. I started writing this as a way to deal with the emotions and struggles I face in my small town. I had the ending nailed down before anything, and it is so important to this story. Before I answer any of your questions, before you keep reading, I want you to sit back and imagine if this story ended with Bdubs opening up to Joel and them being besties, or if it ended with Cleo staying with no preperation to leave, or if Bdubs went back with her. It doesn't make sense, does it? It was just a week, not much changes in a week.

"Does he ever find it in him to work through the problems?" I don't actually have a future planned for them, but I see two possibilities laid out before me. The first being at Joel's hands, he takes the liberties to talk his issues out at Bdubs, to tell him every word Etho complained to him over and over while drunk one night. Bdubs is smaller in muscle and height, he can't body Joel out of his house and he's forced to sit there and listen to so many of his fuck ups spilled out to his face, no hesitation, and he sits and dwells on it. He's forced to reckon with it. He decides to get out. He won't work the same stupid little job and spend all his money on weed. (He doesn't know the cost of living in a city). He grabs a train ticket to the first city close enough to afford with what's in his wallet for the next day after he makes the decision, and he goes, and he learns, and he betters. But I don't really see that happening. This story is cynical, it's sad, it's bitter. I think, I think he doesn't. I think he falls further into substance abuse by the years, he stays broke, he keeps struggling, he doesn't own up to anything, and he doesn't grow. But the rest of his life, it is up to you. He can do what you want him to do.

"does he ever talk (or not talk) with joel about it on the porch?" I think after that night both of them adamantly close themselves off from the other. All their discussions are purely things like splitting the garbage, or getting Joel to fix his car cheap when he's struggling for cash. I think a year or so down the line Joel finds a different town with a little mechanics shop that's willing to hire him, and he finds another little house to rent, and he lives his life away from the pain. He was settled with Etho, but he's restless without him. So no, I don't think they talk. I think there are very few times they end up on the porch together, and if they do, one finishes what they were doing quick.

"or is he forcing himself to deal with it completely alone?" He's not forcing himself to because it's not as conscious as that. He's dealing with it alone and he's burning the bridges, but he's not burning the bridges so that he can deal with it alone, he's burning the bridges because he isn't dealing with it. His hurt is hurting everyone near him and none of them care enough to deal with it. If he's going to be hostile or interfere or toxic or anything he's just going to get dropped. It's not an excuse for his behavior even if it's the reason, unconsciously.

"is this man actually just going to ignore everything and just miss etho in silence and not talk with cleo and keep walking those trails and trees like they used to and driving an hour to get groceries on a tuesday and not taking care of himself until he breaks just like those bracelets on his wrist?" I feel like at this point I've answered most of this. I just want to talk about the bracelets. So I really like your take on what the bracelets represent here. I left them open to your (the readers) interpretation on purpose. So keep letting them mean what they mean to you. I just want to discuss what they mean to you. The bracelets are intended to be those string friendship bracelets. Etho, Cleo, and Bdubs each got two, they were in the other persons assigned colors when they were made. Cleo's are long gone, she cut them off. Etho when he died still had the remains of Bdubs' in his winter jackets pocket cuz he never got around to throwing it out but he lost Cleo's when it broke roughly around a year after she moved. To me they represent holding on to something you dont have anymore. Bdubs still has his because he isn't the slightest bit moved on. Cleo cut hers off when she made plans to move because she was fully ditching them at that point. Etho's respectively represent giving up on ever getting Cleo back in his life, and not wanting Bdubs back but seeing him over and over and not quite moving on because of it.

"also i love a good backstory, if you wanna share how they broke up, if it was fast, if it was expected, if it fell apart like they knew it wasn't going to last, i would appreciate hearing it" The actual breakup was long and drawn out, a screaming match between Cleo and Bdubs as Etho sat and watched, adding his two cents against both of them every so often, until he stood up, knocking into the table and knocking his chair over and yelled that he was done, that he was leaving them both. He pulled blankets out of the closet and claimed the spare room while muttering. Cleo and Bdubs sat there staring at the hall for quite some time before Cleo turned to him and said she was done too. She pulled more blankets out of the hall closet and shoved them into Bdubs' chest, telling him he messed up the most and to go sleep on the couch, that he knows the state of her back. And he did. It was cold. But the breakup had been building since a month into the relationship. Cleo was fiercely independent, she didn't want them invading her space and her time, she'd spend it with them when she wanted to at the end of the day. Bdubs was far too dependent, showing up at their respective jobs with shitty food and staying too long and clinging to their sides, and complaining and worrying about what they were doing when they shooed him away, and at home all he did was talk to himself, talk over the other two. Cleo learned to talk over him. Etho learned to be even quieter. He developed three personalities. One was for cleo, where he left her alone until she sought him out and where he talked "honestly" when prompted, but only when prompted, where he knew her schedule but only showed up when she needed rides due to sudden weather change. One for bdubs where he was quiet, where he arranged his schedule to accommodate his "random" appearances, where he made him think he knew enough to never feel obligated to ask questions about him but to participate just enough for Bdubs to think it was a two sided conversation. And one for when all three of them were in the same area together. One where he was quiet, he was small, nothing about him existed until the other two stopped arguing and competeing for space. Which never happened but he said he'd take what was left over if it did. There was so much conflict its a miracle they lasted as long as they did (of course they did, Etho's parents were drunks, Bdubs' always fight, Cleo's stopped talking to her when she became to feminine, and expressed interest in being a girl, none of them knew what healthy was, they just knew theyd made some sort of commitment and they used to have fun, so they stuck around) but inevitably they all gave up.

[jameui]

MOVIE DATE

PAIRING: Hwang Hyunjin x Manager!M!Reader

GENRE: Angst, Fluff

WARNING: Hyunjin being a jerk

SUMMARY: You boyfriend, Hyunjin took you out on a date to watch your favorite movie.

You sighed in exhaustion and as if the world was trying to test you, a fast running bicycle came your way causing you to jump to the side, so fast that you forgot about the takeouts you had in your hands and at a blink of an eye the neatly boxed items fell to the ground, all the food now spilled on the floor with your eyes widening in fear. "Shit!" You yelled out and tried to get back to the restaurant again, but as soon as you got there the line was already long and it'd take you ages to get to the counter to order, again.

You were at your way to your work with your phone squeezed in between your shoulder and ear as you talked to your co-manager on the other line who seemed agitated for your tardiness, while you tried to balance the foods you were made to order. "Yes, sir. I'll make sure that won't happen again." You told the male before the call was cut short when he decided to hang up all of a sudden.

Looking around, you saw a chinese restaurant that had the smallest line, so you went there and bought the food there, even though the orders of the group was not exactly what they wanted for you to buy. You just couldn't go back empty handed.

After a few minutes of walking, you finally arrived at the venue of the fansign event and got there just in time before Stray Kids were called to the stage for their activity to be done, but the moment you got there you saw that the people present were already eating their food away. They noticed your presence entering the room whilst their head turned to look at you. "I... Good morning, everyone." You greeted them. 'Guess their manager got their food delivered.'

You didn't get a reply, except from the group who was more than happy to see that you had food on your hands. "Hyung! Thank God. I was starving." The group's youngest, Jeongin said as he helped you put the foods down on the table. "You're seriously a life saver."

You smiled at him giving him a muttered thanks that earned you a smile from Jeongin. Honestly speaking, Jeongin was the second best person you ever liked in the group, the first being Lee Felix since he was the only person to ever approach you on your first day since he was able to see how much you were so nervous. Felix was also one of the members who taught you korean, the other being Bang Chan. You had always knew the group back then, and now and you were damn thankful that you got the opportunity to be in their circle.

Knowing how young you were to be working for them, they treated you nicely, not because they needed to, rather cause it was in their nature to be caring. Well, at least except one person. You were the closest to Felix who treated you like his personal manager and a friend as well, going out on friendly dates with you to the park, dog cafés, just anywhere Felix would find interesting to visit.

Who's the person that seemed irritated whenever you were around you ask? Why, the one and only visual king, Hwang Hyunjin. He doesn't actually treat you bad, but the way his eyes would always turn dark or displeased when you show up in his line of sight made you feel so small and felt totally unwelcomed. That was then, apparently, since today the male looked a little too quiet and didn't even bother to look at you. Believe me or not that's actually the kindest thing he's done to you.

You would try to go to him to try and talk to him, worried by his silence. You just furrowed your brows and sighed completely aware that no matter how much you try to talk to him he won't even dare to acknowledge you being there for him.

"M/n, are you just gonna stand there? Come and eat." Chan told you, but you just politely declined his offer with the shake of your head before telling him that you had just taken your breakfast and that you were full, more and you feel like your stomach's gonna burst. "Hm, suit yourself, but I'll be leaving mine untouched, so you can eat it when you get hungry, yeah?"

"You're so kind, Chan." You gave him a smile that got Chan smiling also showing his deep dimples that you could just dive in it anytime soon.

"Hey, hey, hey! We've known each other the longest. Why do I still have to call you 'hyung' and M/n doesn't?" Jisung, one of the group's rapper, pouted with folded arms as Chan chuckled before ruffling the kid's hair that Jisung angrily shook off.

"Well, since he's not that spoiled, unlike you." Chan answered Jisung who gasped dramatically. "And he also gained my permission, so—"

"Whenever or not he's around, is he the only person that ever comes into your mind?" That all too familiar voice spoke out, all your heads turning towards the person. He scoffed and stood up with a smirk on his face, probably in disbelief that the whole group was talking to you and always thought about you. "I mean, come on. There's gotta be something else to talk about other than this... person." You felt his eyes look at you while your eyes stared at him with rising anger. "There's sports, other artists, songs, music, so many and you chose to pick him as the topic of your talk."

"Hyunjin, that is very disrespectful." Chan gritted out, but Hyunjin knew better than to listen or to even stop.

"I'm really not, hyung." Hyunjin's smirk grew wider eyeing you with a suspicious look on his eyes. An idea popped in his head as he opened his mouth to talk. "But, if you want to, I could show you how disrespectful I can get." Without any warning, he took the take-out container and bottled drink in his hand and gave you no second to react as he poured all of its contents onto your head with a loud gasp coming out of you. "There. I'll call it a masterpiece even."

"Hwang Hyunjin!" Bang Chan's voice boomed through the whole room a still smirking Hyunjin turning around to face the older male who was fuming with anger. "You—"

"Chan!" You called out to him before things got a little out of hand. For pete's sake their going to just fight because Hyunjin had made a mess of you? You were not even worth the fight. "No. I'm fine. I can just quickly change, that's all. I'll be right back and I better get no reports about you two fighting." You told the two, Chan rolling his eyes.

You got out of the room and ran as fast as you can to the nearest restroom, cleaning yourself as soon as you arrived. Times like this you would immediately bawl your eyes out, but with the constant behavior that Hyunjin showed to you, you grew used to it. Heck, you even sometimes feel that the other boys only act like they liked you being there and when you weren't, they'd stab you behind your back. "Goodness, why won't this get off."

"Need help?" A raspy voice came from the entrance of the restroom, turning your head around to see Felix leaning himself on the door frame with his arms crossed, then untangled them to let his hands rest inside his pockets and stepped inside as you smiled at him. "Do you need more tissue?"

You shook your head at him, your attention back on your stained favorite shirt wiping them clean with the tissues the place's restroom owned. "Nah, there's plenty here. Besides, I'm all dried up now." You said and showed yourself to him, Felix knitting his brows in worry.

He seeped air through his teeth and cocked his head to the side, unsure if you should be wearing that now dirty shirt when you'd be with them during the activity the whole time. "I don't think you should be wearing that."

"Why? It's my favorite sweater." You chuckled half-heartedly.

"Yeah, I know, M/n, but it's dirty. Plus, I think it gets pretty uncomfortable seeing that stain on your shirt and it gets sticky. Yeugh." Felix pretended to barf which got you laughing softly. Felix, though not trying to be funny, whatever he does it always seemed so funny to you.

"Fine, fine. I'll go change, the problem though is that I didn't bring an extra shirt with me today." You told Felix scratching your nape.

"Really? Well, I guess we have to borrow from one of the group's." Felix suggested, but your eyes grew sizes bigger upon hearing that and waved your hands.

"No way, Felix! I have already done enough damage, I can't afford to borrow a shirt from one of the members, or to you even." You told him, but it all fell on deaf ears as Felix refused to listen. "I'm just trouble, Felix. You don't have to worry about me."

Felix hummed with two fingers pinching his chin gently. "Yeah, I don't think so." He took your wrist and started to drag you back to the dressing room. "Come on, I know there's someone willing to let you borrow a shirt." You just sighed, knowing that Felix won't even dare to change his mind when he had already set them on something.

Alas, as you two got there, none of the members even had a spare shirt to let you borrow. They were very willing and even tried to look around if there was anything, but to no avail. Although, there was one last person you didn't ask. "Hyunjin. You were the cause of this mess, you let him borrow your shirt." Felix sternly told the older male who pilled his brows together.

"What?! No way! Are you telling me I'd offer to do something for that guy? No!" Hyunjin retorted making Felix growl.

Felix was so ready to throw punches at the male who didn't seem to be bothered by the situation, but you just put a hand on Felix's shoulder and assured him. "That's alright, Felix. My sweater was thick enough to not get my undershirt wet. Although, I'm grateful for your effort." You smiled at him and sighed.

Just in time, you heard a call from one of your co-manager that the group was already being requested to be at the stage right now. You gave them an encouraging smile as they all did the same. "Alright boys. It's time to go out there and meet millions of your fans."

The group all shouted, excluding Hyunjin, hurray and hurried out to get on stage, you following behind after you were able to discard your sweater, leaving you only on your black t-shirt. You shivered at the cold now that you were left with a thin clothing that wasn't appropriate for the type of weather you were having and not mention that the place was fully air-conditioned.

Your shaking was not too evident, but one of the members, Seungmin, was able to notice it. Feeling pity he made his way to Hyunjin and tried to convince him. "Jinnie, M/n's cold. Please lend him your jacket, at least. He'll get sick if he continues to get exposed to the cold."

"Better for him."

"Hyunjin, please... Besides, you're already wearing thick layers of clothes why not let M/n borrow." Seungmin reasoned out and solemnly knitted his brows to persuade the male, Hyunjin rolling his eyes at his bestfriend and huffed before taking his jacket off of him and handed it over to Seungmin who silently squeaked. "Thanks, Hyunjin." Hyunjin brushed it off with a 'whatever', the younger of the two jogging his way towards you and gave you the jacket he got from Hyunjin. "I noticed your shivering, so I want you to take this jacket and no, you can't say you can't accept it."

You nodded your head at him and took the jacket from his hands. "Thank you, Seungmin."

"My pleasure." He smiled at you with those puppy dog like smile. He skipped back to reunite with his group while you put on the jacket that Seungmin offered you. You were still in thought though how Seungmin was able to convince Hyunjin to let you borrow his jacket. You knew Hyunjin owned the jacket since he wouldn't let them go since the moment you arrived.

You noticed how the jacket was too big for you, since the sleeves of the piece of clothing only let your fingers peek out through the holes while the flaps reached further down your hips, but it totally felt cozy and smelled like... Hyunjin. How do you explain it? You don't even know where to begin. It was him. The reason why you wanted to work with Stray Kids. You didn't want to look like you were some type of stalker, but all you ever wanted was to befriend Hyunjin.

The befriending process didn't go the way you actually thought it would go. Everytime his eyes met yours or you heard his voice you'd get all flustered and so nervous that your tongue always gets tied, the words you want to tell him gets trapped inside your mouth. It all started to be just an admiration towards the slightly older male until your determination to become his friend gradually became an unknown feeling towards Hyunjin, until realizing later that you actually liked the group's rapper, despite all his bad treatment towards you.

Back to reality, you hugged yourself and took in the wonderful scent the artist gave off until one of your co-worker nudged you. "Hey, stop sniffing the clothes. You totally look like a sasaeng."

"W-what? I wasn't sniffing anything." You denied it earning an eye roll. Later, you heard the whole place bursted into shouts of joy and excitement as Stray Kids made their appearance on the stage greeting all their fans inside and outside of the place. They all took their turns taking the mic to express their happiness and gratefulness to their ocean of fans that filled up the whole place.

Soon, the group was seated at a long rectangular table that was a perfect fit letting all the members seat on their respective seats. There were chairs as well settled in front of the table with each settled across a specific member.

You were appointed to keep guard and stand behind Hyunjin, in any case of fans throwing shade at him or any forms of harm or hate towards the member who had just been caught up in a supposed bullying rumor.

The line started to form as people who were present inside the place took their turns to talk to each member and get a sign from them. So far, you could only wonder how paranoid the company was to keep you on guard of Hyunjin when all these people here are Stays and they wouldn't do such thing to throw hate to any members in the group. Right?

The line was still too long to be gone in just minutes making you sigh, hearing your tummy rumble hoping that no one heard that. You now finally regret not eating that noodles that Chan offered you, the hunger finally hitting your system as your tummy continued to grumble. You pursed your lips and forced your eyes closed while you brought your head down in embarrassment. 'Fuck... why now?'

After a short while, the line was starting to get shorter and shorter, you thanking the heavens for the fast passing by of the time. But, the moment you least expected to happen happened. You felt a harsh tap on your legs and another and another after it finally took your attention, getting a little shocked that the action was done by the person who hated you the worst. "Take it before I change my mind." He told you. You complied and bowed at him politely as he tuts his tongue. "Who would even think of going to work on an empty stomach?"

'You... poured it on me?' You thought then shrugging it off before you looked at the treat offered to you by Hyunjin. You wondered what type of bread it was and hesitated, although Hyunjin's back was facing you he was able to sense your hard time on trying to eat what he gave you.

"It's not poisoned, M/n." He whispered as he signed the album that had his photo on it, then looking up at the fan who would like to talk to him.

Their talk wasn't audible to you, but you opened the packaging of the nicely wrapped pastry and bit on it with your body facing the wall so your back was turned against the people to cover yourself while you ate. One of your co-manager did notice your unwanted behavior and stomped his way to you and took the baked good from your hands and threw it to the ground to step on it and crush it good. "What do you think you're doing, L/n?! You're being inappropriate right now." He gritted out to you with a small voice almost like a whisper so no one else would hear you two. You bowed your head subtly before a hand was placed right below your chin as you looked up at him confused. "Spit." He ordered, referring to the food you were chewing.

You nod your head and spit out the food that was in your mouth into his hand while he picked up the wasted food and left, then threw it all at a trash can. "Fuck." You sighed as you held your chest and slowly turned around to face the non-existent line, the group now interacting with their fans.

Just looking at them now, you were able to remember when you were the one who was there seated at the chairs shouting out the name of the person you would call as your bias, which is no other than Kim Seungmin. At least, when you still didn't take the job to be one of the group's manager. Usually, it would only take one manager to manage the group, but why did this group require another one? You questioned yourself. It was all unexplained to you, but all you gotta do was to just be glad that you get to be friends with the people you see as your role models.

"Hyunjin-ah! When did you start trading jackets with your manager?" The question came out as a shout that got everyone laughing, including the group. You were only able to chuckle knowing that it was Seungmin who convinced Hyunjin to let you borrow his jacket.

Hyunjin didn't get to answer the question, when another fan spoke from the crowd that got every fans' attention. "Are rumors true that you don't treat Manager L/n well?"

Chan furrowed his brows and picked up his microphone. "Where did you get this story?" He chuckled trying to make it sound that it wasn't true and just pure bluff. Chan looked at Hyunjin with the face that told Hyunjin that he should start treating you well if he didn't want the netizens to know about his treatment towards you. "Anyways, it's seriously not true."

-----------

A few minutes later and the event was finally finished and the group was bidding their goodbyes to their fans as they started to walk backstage. You waited for them at their waiting room with a handful of bottled waters for the boys to pick up once they get inside. The door soon opened revealing the group with a tense atmosphere following them that got you so confused. "Hey—"

"Hyunjin. If word gets out about your mistreatment to M/n, that would be a serious damage to our image and to M/n as well, 'cause he's obviously in pain because of you!" Chan yelled at the trouble causing male who only rolled his eyes paying no heed to his warning.

"Atleast, I never went too far as to really hurt him physically." Hyunjin deadpanned Chan growling at his response. Your eyes flickered to Hyunjin, then to Chan not knowing what to do in this situation.

"You are seriously being a jerk right now, Hyunjin." Chan fumed in anger while Hyunjin just continued to act deaf and played on his phone. Chan, giving up, sighed and plopped down on his seat. "Ayayay."

They took turns in getting your glances as you thought of a way to calm the atmosphere. You had already been their manager for a over a year now and this was the only time that Hyunjin ever spoke up to Chan and, to top it off, with sass and without the slightest feeling of being bothered. That was the moment you felt like you had enough. You've had enough with all these things. You were tired of yourself to even think that Hyunjin would finally soften up to you and be his friend. You were wrong to even apply for this kind of job. The group wouldn't be fighting if it hadn't been for you appearing in their lives all so suddenly. "Guys... let him do as he pleases. I'll be the one to take of whatever the netizens hear."

Chan raised his eyes up at you with furrowed brows. "What do you plan on doing? Whatever it is don't do it."

You smiled and nodded. "I won't, Chan." You held up the bottles in your hands and turned on a toothy smile. "Water? Anyone?" They all sighed in relief and got their turns in picking their own bottled water, the last one not being picked up by Hyunjin, so you decided to give it to him. You brought the cold drink to his face making him flinch as he looked up at you. "Thank you for the bread, by the way." You told him and giggled. "I've already packed your jacket in your bag." You informed him and patted his back.

The once crazily terrifying atmosphere now turned into a more comfortable one, the one you always would want to see. You didn't know what got you the courage to speak or blurt out whatever you had in your mind, but you looked at Hyunjin and said: "Hyunjin, can I talk to you privately?" Thankfully, their loud voices was able to distract themselves from hearing your request to Hyunjin who sighed and nodded his head. He stood up from his seat and started to move outside of the room. You followed behind closely, feeling intimidated by the month older's tall figure. "Hyunjin..."

"Cut to the chase, M/n. I don't have much time." He told you as you nod your head in understanding and fiddled with your fingers.

"I know, you'd probably like hearing this, but could I have the permission to quit as your group's manager?" You asked him, his forehead creasing that made him pull his brows together. "I was able to notice what the group had become the moment I became your manager—"

"And do you think quitting would change it?" Hyunjin asked you with a raised brow. "If anything, it'd probably—no, it would break their hearts to know that you quitted. If you do so, you're not only quitting as a manager, but as their friend as well."

"And you're able to say that after you purposely tried to have me fired or suspended from work by offering me that bread?" You sarcastically answered, Hyunjin clearing his throat.

"Well... that wasn't my intention. I didn't even know it'd get you fired." Hyunjin replied making you chuckle.

"Yeah..." You replied with a sad smile. "But, I don't wanna be the reason why you and Chan would always fight. Stray Kids is Stray Kids because they're fun and loving, caring. And I don't want to change that by being around the group." Hyunjin never replied anymore and you sighed. "I'm heading back now." You said and as you started to walk back inside, Hyunjin spoke.

"I wish you never entered our life, at all, M/n." He told you that got your heart broken into pieces. Sure, you admitted that he never liked you even just a bit, but him saying it so bluntly to you, it's like he does really mean it and could only care less. You were about to speak when Hyunjin beat you to it. "If so, I wouldn't be able to garner these undeniable feelings I have for you."

You froze. Were you hearing right? You just cleaned your ears this morning, well you do it everyday. Is your ear trying to play with you? "W-what?"

"DAMN! WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT?!" You gasped with your mouth full of popcorn, your boyfriend, Hyunjin seated beside you at the movie theater. He smiled at you admiring how cute you looked with your shocked expression that was being illuminated by the big screen. "Jinnie! Look, they're gonna kiss! AH!!" As the two actors in the movie was about to kiss, one of the movie's cast bursted out of the door cutting the kiss and earned a few 'oh's and 'I hate you, Chan's. "Chan is such a cock blocker."

"Watch your mouth, babe." Hyunjin told you making you pout.

"It's true, though!" You retorted and Hyunjin could only laugh at your cuteness and honest opinions.

[sonoftatooine]

Whumpay 2021

DAY 31: ALT DAY - SLEEP DEPRIVATION

Characters: Anakin Skywalker, Shaak Ti

Summary: When Anakin makes the decision to go and save Palpatine from Mace Windu, his lack of sleep over the past week chooses the worst possible moment to catch up with him. Shaak Ti attempts to intervene.

***

It was said that the Force, in the hands of a competent Jedi, could do many things. It was also said—with greater and greater frequency over the course of the war—that in the hands of Anakin Skywalker, it could do the impossible. Right now, however, Anakin himself was of the opinion that this was a bold-faced lie, for the one thing he could not make it do, as he staggered unsteadily yet imperturbably toward the main doors of the Jedi Temple, was have it chase away the fog that was threatening to take over his over-tired mind and send him spiralling into the deep, impenetrable darkness of forced rest. He had been fighting it for days, drawing on the Force to fend off sleep as he searched desperately for a solution to save his wife from the awful fate that plagued his dreams whenever he tried to rest. And now, only now, when he was so close to finding the solution that the Jedi had denied him, when a moment's delay meant that he could lose that knowledge for ever, did his reserves finally run out, and the ability to stay awake and moving start to slip through his durasteel grip like sand.

Sand. Sand. His head felt like it was full of sand. Scratchy and grainy, lodged in unlikely places, disrupting all the whirring mechanisms that governed his thoughts. He'd had the same problem with Threepio when he was building him, without his coverings to protect him from the ravages of Tatooine, and he'd spent hours cleaning the stuff out of his servos just as he had with Watto's junk at the shop. He wanted to shake his head to dislodge it, but nothing he did made it—

He had been so focused on putting one foot in front of the other that he barely realised when he collided full on with a tall, slim figure standing directly in front of the door. The world swam before as one of the frequent waves of dizziness overcame him, and he felt strong, slim fingers circling about the flesh of his biceps to keep him upright. Dazed, he blinked, trying to chase away the strange blur that had overtaken his vision, and the smudge of red and white and purple before him coalesced into the face of Jedi Master Shaak Ti. Her hairless brows were drawn into a frown, and she looked very concerned.

“Anakin,” she said. “Are you alright? Where are you going?”

Anakin wished he could dislodge the sand from his brain, but his thoughts wouldn't come coherently, and all he could force out from his lips was a garbled, “the Chancellor— I need—”

Shaak Ti's frown deepened.

“The Chancellor?,” she asked. “But the Masters have already gone to confront him. You need not worry—the situation is already in hand.”

Anakin could only shake his head wordlessly, immediately wishing that he hadn't as his vision swam once again at the sudden movement. She didn't understand. The situation wasn't in hand because Windu might kill Palpatine who was the only one who knew how to save Padmé and he couldn't let Padmé die, he couldn't live without her -

“Shaak Ti,” he gasped out. “Get out of my way.”

He had to get to the door, had to— If he could just get to the door— He tried to pull out of her grasp, but Shaak Ti held on, the press of her fingers on his arms gentle yet firm.

“The Temple is sealed,” she reminded him. “The door is code-locked.”

Oh. Yes. They were expecting retaliation from Palpatine should the Masters fail. Windu had put Shaak Ti in charge of the Temple's defence as a precautionary measure when he had ordered Anakin to wait like a good little Jedi in the Council Chambers while he marched off to kill the man who had always been kind to him, had lied to him, had been the only one to offer to help him save Padmé— But what did it matter? He was a Jedi himself. He had the codes, and Shaak Ti couldn't keep him here when he needed to go—

“And you're in the way of the pad” he snapped.

He jerked back, and this time, he managed break free, but the force of the movement had unbalanced him, bringing on another alarming wave of faintness. His vision blurred, the world spun, his head throbbing painfully with exhaustion and hunger and fear. Hands shot out to catch him once again, and he pitched forward, forced to lean against Shaak Ti to keep his knees from buckling.

“You're not well, Anakin,” the Jedi Master's soft voice spoke somewhere in the vicinity of his ear, but despite how close she was, she sounded distant, muffled, as if she were talking over a bad comm connection. “You should be in the Halls of Healing.”

“I— No. I can't—,” Anakin stammered desperately. He couldn't afford distractions, not with Padmé's life on the line. He had to get to Palpatine now, before Windu— “I'm fine,” he added, trying to push himself back upright again. “I need to go—”

Shaak Ti shook her head.

“What can you possibly do?,” she asked. “Master Windu and the others will handle it. You have done your duty. Let yourself rest.”

Yes, Windu will handle it, Anakin wanted to shout. That's precisely the problem. Padmé was going to die because he couldn't get away, because he couldn't get there on time. His head swam again, and to his horror, he felt tears of fear and frustration pricking at his eyes.

“You don't understand!,” he babbled. How could she understand? How could he explain it to her after he had broken the Code so badly? “There's no time. I have go! I have to do something! I can't just—”

“Anakin, please,” Shaak Ti cut across him. She looked deeply worried. “Let me take you to the healers. You are in no state to be fighting battles against a Sith Lord. You will get yourself killed.”

Anakin shook his head.

“He...he won't kill me,” he murmured, more to himself than to her. “He wants—”

Realising exactly what it is he was about to say, Anakin cut himself off abruptly. He wants me as his apprentice, he thought. That's the price of Padmé's life. My life in service so she and the baby can live. He knew this deeply, instinctively, with all the knowledge of the little boy on Tatooine who had spent his life at the mercy of his masters, even though the part of him that wanted to think not of the Chancellor's lies but of their long friendship tried to tell him that there wouldn't be a price for his help. He couldn't tell Shaak Ti that. Couldn't tell her that, as much as the prospect alarmed him, there was a tiny spark in him beneath the furious insistence that all he wanted was to make sure that Palpatine wasn't killed that was actually considering it. Something of his thoughts must have shown on his face, however, for a look of severe alarm found its way into Shaak Ti's violet eyes.

“He wants what?,” she said, and there was a note of urgency in her tone that he had never heard from her before—usually, she was the very epitome of Jedi calm. “Anakin, what does he want. What has he told you—?”

But before she could demand anything further of him, and before he could even begin to think about evading her questions, four lights blinked out of existence, and the Force screamed. Both Anakin and Shaak Ti staggered under the weight of it.

“What—?” Anakin gasps. He knew those lights. Windu. Fisto. Kolar. Tiin. Where were they? They couldn't just be gone. They couldn't be— There had been four of them and only one of Palpatine. He couldn't have—

“It cannot be,” Shaak Ti breathed, her eyes wide with horror. “Four Jedi Masters... How could he have—?”

She shook herself, as if she could rid herself of fear the way an akk dog did water after a swim.

“We must see to the Temple's defences. I fear he will come for us next, and without—”

But she never got to finish, as Anakin took advantage of her distraction to dart around her towards the keypad. Another wave of dizziness overcame him, and he nearly crumpled in a heap on the floor, but he flung out an arm to break his fall. Bracing his right arm against the wall, he raised his trembling flesh hand to the pad, intent on typing in his code. If only he could stop it from shaking so violently, let alone shift the sand in his head to remember what the damned code was—

A hand circled around his wrist, and he froze.

“Anakin, no,” Shaak Ti said sternly, even as her voice shook at the feeling in the Force of four Jedi Masters dead. “I cannot let you go to him. Whatever he wants with you, it will bring you nothing but harm.”

Harm. Harm. Palpatine had harmed Windu and the others. Had killed them. He should want to kill him, as he had for one short moment in the man's office when he revealed to him that he was the Sith Lord behind the war. Did he want to kill him now? No, he needed him to save Padmé. He needed that knowledge, that power. Who cared if it harmed him as long as it helped her? A small voice in his head whispered to him that if Sidious had the power to defeat four Jedi alone, then surely being able to save Padmé would be nothing by comparison. Oh Force, he felt sick.

“Please,” he begged, appalled to hear his voice tremble and break as he spoke. He wanted to cry, wanted to rest, to fall asleep in Padmé's arms knowing that she was safe, that he would no longer be plagued by dreams of her death and that he wouldn't have to turn to the Sith Lord that had just killed four Jedi Masters for help. But he couldn't have any of that. All he had was one possible way to save her life that Shaak Ti wouldn't let him take. “Please, it's not me, it's— She's going to die! Padmé's going to die and I have to...”

Shaak Ti's eyes widened in sudden realisation, but he could barely see her through the blackness that was encroaching on his vision. She tilted sideways or—no, he tilted sideways, tumbling to the floor and what was that? Was the door opening? Had she opened the door? No, it was someone coming in—many someones with heavy booted feet and blue and white armour and weapons pointed—

There was a click of many weapons being primed, a shout, the snap-hiss of a lightsaber being ignited, and then the darkness consumed him amid a hurricane of blaster fire.

[ping-ping-ying]

ATEEZ as Yanderes! PT. 1/11

⚠️WARNING⚠️ : toxic relationships, mental, physical, and emotional abuse, mentions of death/murder, descriptive violence, kidnapping,

⚠️Disclaimer⚠️ : these are ALL FICTIONAL, and my OWN personal opinions and perceptions on the boys. Yanderes are NOT to be taken lightly or romanticized, these types of people are REAL and are/can be very dangerous. These kinds of stories are ONLY for entertainment. If you know anyone like this in real life, please get help!

HONGJOONG ⚖

Worship Yandere

"I'll do anything for you! I'll even kill for you! Please use me however you want!"

Hongjoong DEFINITELY strikes me as the worship yandere

Stalking would be highly likely

So he can know exactly what you like and don't like

Whether it be clothes, movies, your favorite historical event, it didn't natter

He took EXTREME action into knowing everything about you before he actually confronted you

When he first met you, he didn't just fall in love with your personality, but EVERYTHING about you

You didn't know but he was basically putty in your hands

Not that you would ever know

At first you were weirded out by him, due to him being so quiet, and his wandering eyes always staring at you

If you are upset, he will do ANYTHING to make you feel better

Someone at work/school made you upset?

You heard the news of that persons death the following week

You wanted a new pair of shoes that you couldn't afford?

Expect to have a whole closet filled with new shoes

No matter what you do, HE WILL NEVER hurt you

Like- ever

You could betray him, from the point of no return and he'd still worship you

Hongjoong doesn't care if you don't love him, he will still aim to please you at all times

He doesn't like killing people, he will only kill if they seem like a threat to you or your happiness

Doesn't realize he's being too clingy and possessive

But you say nothing in fear of hurting him

Hongjoong isn't that big of a softie once you get to know him

His cute, shy, and introvert persona would fade gradually over time

It was actually unnoticeable since the shift in character was cleverly planned out

Eventually you caught him in the act of beating up one of your friends because he was jealous that you were spending more time with them than with him

You called off your relationship immediately

He wouldn't fight you on the matter

But that won't stop him from secretly buying you things or taking care of your "problems"

SEONGHWA ⚖

Sadistic Yandere

"It hurts? That's your fault! Next time learn your lesson and stop looking at other men!"

I know exactly what you're thinking

"WOULDN'T THIS BE SAN?!"

I have thought about it, and to me Seonghwa strikes me as this type of Yandere the most

Seonghwa was also HIGHLY intelligent

He knew EXACTLY how to make you fall for him

It didn't matter how long it took

You were going to be his

Made sure to be your typical Wattpad fan fiction boy, whether you wanted him to be that "bad boy" or "good boy"

In the end he decided to try the good boy persona

When he met you, everything had to be perfect

He rehearsed lines ahead of time, and practiced until he had the courage to face you

It was at a summer carnival event, he helped you win a prize at the strength game

From the moment you looked into his eyes, you were putty in his hands

After almost a year of knowing each other, and a couple months of dating, things were going great

That was, until you decided to hang out with your old friends from high school

You invited Seonghwa to be your date to the gathering, and it was hell for him

The way you completely disobeyed his unspoken rules of talking to other men that wasnt him

The final straw that made him break his character was when it was time to leave and you have your male friend a big hug while giving him that smile that makes Seonghwas heart melt

When you got home he grabbed and dragged you to the bedroom

"Seonghwa what are you-"

SLAPPED YOU DEAD ACROSS YOUR FACE AND DID NOT GIVE TWO FUCKS

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!"

*SLAP*

"STOP IT WHAT-"

He smacked you a couple more times before he pushed you on the bed and decided you needed a lesson

Would torture you, sexually or plain physically

Don't scream or beg, it only fuels his drive to punish you

Will not stop until HE beileves you learned your lesson

YUNHO ⚖

Self-Harm Yandere

"Hey... look at me... look at me... look, there's so much blood coming out..."

Through your relationship, Yunho was pretty normal

Until you accidentally forgot to give him his goodnight kiss and hug

It was ONE night, because you were so exhausted from working/school and you passed out on the couch

In his mind, that one mistake told him that you didn't love him anymore

This Yandere has two sub units

One where they start harming themselves in private, and the second one, harming themselves openly

Yunho started off doing it privately

He planned this strategically

When you noticed cuts and bruises on his wrist the next day, you questioned him frantically

To which he nonchalantly explained that he hurt himself at the gym

But you weren't an idoit

You KNEW these particular kinds of injuries were caused by self harming

But you didn't press the issue because you assumed it was a sensitive topic for him, and didn't want to trigger him

Yunho began to lose trust in you

He was scared you would end up leaving him one day

All because of that ONE night

Even though after that one night, the normal goodnight kisses and hugs continued

But to Yunho it wasn't the same

So when you came home one day later in the evening, you and Yunho got into an argument

A very HEATED argument

It ended up with you saying his WORST FEAR

"If you don't stop this right now, we are over !"

That's when he snapped

"You're breaking up with me?!"

"If you don't stop acting like a selfish jackass then yes!"

Honey that's all he needed to hear to send him into a frenzy

He started punching himself in the face, to the point where his mouth started bleeding

"YUNHO WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! STOP IT!"

He ignored you and then grabbed a sharp knife from the kitchen and sliced all over his arms, legs, torso, and face

You began to cry, and fear for your life

You backed up and was about to dial 911 when he yelled out,

"YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME! I'LL KILL MYSELF! DO YOU HEAR ME?! I'LL DO IT RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!"

You acted quickly and raced over to him cautiously trying to get him to stop

"Yunho baby I'm not leaving you!"

"LIAR!"

"Honey I didn't mean what I said! We were arguing and I just said something cruel but please know that I won't leave you ever! I love you."

"YOU PROMISE?!"

"I promise now stop hurting yourself please!"

Yunho did what you asked and then started to break down and cry

You engulfed him in a big hug and whispered sweet nothings into his ear

All the while, Yunho smirked, and smiled wickedly while crying

His plan worked

There was no way you were ever going to leave him now

Or so he thought........

YEOSANG ⚖

Stalker Yandere

"Do you ever get the feeling you're being watched?"

Yeosang is a man who likes to live off the radar

No one really seems him or acknowledges his existence unless he makes himself known

So stalking you everyday was no problem

You were oblivious to the fact he stalked you day and night

But that doesn't mean you didn't have any strange feelings

For the past three years you always had this sense of uneasiness

You didn't know how to explain it exactly

But you felt that you were always on the defense

Ready for something unexpected to happen to you

And not in a good way

Whenever you confessed these feelings, people would laugh and say that you're paranoid

And yes you were paranoid, because your psyche never lies, it's there for a reason

"I'm serious! Maybe I'm being stalked or something."

"Who would want to stalk you? You don't do anything."

A brutal attack, but the statement was true nonetheless

But that never set your psyche at ease

And the most fucked up thing about your whole "paranoia" was that Yeosang was in your life

He was your neighbor

And the two of you were quite acquainted

Granted Yeosang didn't exactly LIVE in that house down the street, but you'd never know

He would take run around the neighborhood for exercise and would stop to talk to you if he saw you

He played the role of the normal neighbor a little TOO well

Stalking Yanderes CAN be violent, but Yeosang wasn't

It would ruin his ability to stalk you in peace

He never hurt your, or the people around you

One day he told you a riddle that had you stumped completely

You loved when he told you riddles because it was like a little traditional thing whenever you two say each other

"Everyone has it, but no one can lose it."

This riddle had you stumped for days, and you didn't want to cheat by looking it up online

So by magic chance two days later, at night when you were laying in bed in the dark trying to sleep, the answer hit you

Instead of getting giddy with excitement that you fianlly figured out his riddles like you usually did, it made you feel, puzzled

The way his voice sounded as he told you the riddle

The smile that was staining his face as he did, had your psyche going crazy

You needed to calm yourself, because it was just a riddle, nothing more, and nothing less

So you drifted off into sleep and mumbled the words,

"A shadow."

SAN ⚖

Training Yandere

"Say you love me... SAY IT, SAY THAT YOU LOVE ME! SAY IT!"

This is why I didn't label San as the sadistic Yandere

Even though he could have easily slipped into that category

But not with this one chile

Unlike the Sadistic Yandere, San doesn't like causing you pain, it hurts him deeply to see you in pain

A lot of Atinys (myself included) are so used to San being labeled as "the demon" or "possessed" when it comes to his stage presence or when it comes to NSFW AUs

But you need to remember that San is actually a bubbly, clingy little cupcake off stage

So that's why I stuck him with the Training Yandere

But you need to be trained, so he has no choice but to hurt you

He easily kidnapped you after breaking into your home and drugging your food.

You didn't know who San was, never saw him a day in your life

But San was convinced that you'd known each other for years

(I can also sense a tiny bit of the Delusional Yandere in this one, but like I said A TINY bit)

In the basement you were, chained to a chair like an animal

He came skipping down the stairs happily and had a plate of food for you

"Now you can eat if you say the magic words."

"Please?"

San chuckled at your response

In normal situations yes that is the magic word, but San said "words" not "word".

"No that's not it."

"Well then what it is?"

"You know what it is silly."

The confused look on your face made San beileve you were lying, and that you were just being a brat

He hated brats

"Alright I see you're still going with this-"

He brought out his bag filled with torture equipment

And that's when you lost all sense of reality

You kept telling yourself that you were dreaming

It was the only logical explanation for this situation

"Awe don't cry, just say the magic words and you can be free of your restraints."

"....."

"The magic words are "I love you".

"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?! I DON'T LOVE YOU! I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU!

(Y/N why couldn't you just play along tsk tsk)

"Oh boy, I was hoping we wouldn't have to do this."

The first tool he got out was a hammer, a big, hammer

And he released one of your hands only to hold it down on the table next to him

"You have ten fingers, let's see if you can say the words before we get to ten."

He aimed for your pointer finger and slammed the hammer down on it with all his might

"One."

You screamed bloody murder as you felt the pain shoot through your body

But you still didn't say anything

He slammed the hammer on your middle finger

"Two."

You still didn't say anything, how could you with all the pain you're in

The next finger

"Three."

No response

The next finger

"Four."

No response

San was getting frustrated, but didn't show it

He eventually broke all ten of your fingers, and was amazed at your strength of not giving in

But that's just the more violent he had to be

Next on the list, was your face

He slapped and punched you repeatedly, blood getting everywhere and your vision becoming blurry

But you STILL didn't give in

San had enough

He grabbed a knife from his bag and held it at your feet

This was also the final straw for you

You can live with broken fingers, but not feet

"SAN! I- I LOVE YOU!"

"What?"

"I'm sorry for being a brat, please forgive me! I love you!"

"Oh darling! I knew it!"

Of course you were lying, but he didn't know that

[sweetestlamb]

Still, I Rise

Summary: Damn teenagers and their angst. 

Author's Note: Back with another chapter, if you didn’t already know it I will be revealing our mystery character from the last chapter LOL please put down the bats and weapons (jk take them out it’s hilarious!) With this chapter we are getting closer to the “climax” and I am so excited to write the fun chapters I have planned ahead, one scene that I am really looking forward to writing is the camping trip, I had so much plans and events that I wanted to see that didn’t because TVN woke up and chose basic, we hate to see it. I can’t wait to rewrite history honestly also can’t wait to just move to onto regular schmegular teen problems, I swearrrrrrr. 

"Don't you dare embarrass me this time. You aren't ugly why can't you get these damn little rich brats to like you? Are you truly this useless? Don't come home if you can't make this one fall for you!"

Those had been his father's final words right before his hand split his lower lip open with a razor sharp blow that made his head whip in recoil. His father's footsteps faded as he walked away leaving him crumpled on the ground, anger and embarrassment raging in his blood. He hadn't chosen this life at all, never wanted to be a bargaining chip for that despicable man. First with Eun Dan Oh and now this new girl, Kang Sujin.

She'd initially stood him up and he had felt foolish sitting in the lavish restaurant by himself, checking his phone but no calls or messages arrived.

His father had been livid that night, more vicious than usual his stepmother's weak screams served as the soundtrack for his brutal beating. Why couldn’t she just be quiet? Did it make her feel better when she acted as if she actually gave a shit about him? His brother coming into his room after with those pathetic weeping eyes and a bandage had only made him angrier, he shoved him away slamming the door in his face, refusing his help. He didn't need anyone, nobody could save him from his horrible fate. 

It hadn't taken much research to find out her school and on impulse he'd gone there without her knowledge, watching from afar at first. A tiny girl with short hair framing her face had ran giggling into a taller girl with long dark hair and a classically beautiful face, they walked side by side smiling and laughing and that's when he'd heard her call out , "Sujin we should get something to eat!"

It wasn't love at first sight or anything ridiculous and disgustingly romantic like that, but he felt a connection to the girl for some inconceivable reason as if they were kindred spirits or something, maybe it was the remnant of a bruise he saw on her wrist hidden beneath her sweater. 

It seemed they had more in common then he had initially believed, it was a grim similarity. 

He'd gone home feeling less burdened than before, and his father's smile had been terrifying when he'd told him that he would work hard to win the girl over, only because he knew how quickly that smile could evaporate and his father could become the monster he was accustomed to. He tried not to flinch as the older man clapped him on the shoulder, his body already in fight or flight mode.

His father had merely smirked at his apparent fear.

Bastard.

So he'd taken to following the other girl around, she was going to be his fiancé anyway so he saw nothing wrong with it. And that was how he learned about the other boy, a tall slender boy who looked like someone that would grace an idol magazine cover. They were together more often than he liked, and it seemed more than platonic if the glances and subtle touches were a sign.

He wasn't jealous per se, but this would be a roadblock in his plan that he couldn't afford. He was getting used to not being beaten. 

The day he'd followed them to the hospital presented another challenge for him, he hated hospitals and what they represented with every fiber of his being. He'd spent too much time in them growing up and then again for a girl who couldn't care less about him, she was another reminder that he wasn't worthy of love. He had thought he loved her but still hurt her whenever she disobeyed him, he knew he was no better than his father.

Unexpectedly Sujin had burst through the hospital doors, surprising him and forcing him to hide lest she spot him, peeking out from his hiding place behind a tree he saw her distraught and near tears running the opposite direction. He stood in shock merely watching and waiting to see if the unknown boy would follow her, but thankfully he never came.

Pushing down his own wariness and discomfort he walked into the hospital immediately feeling a cold chill on his skin, he refused to call it trauma that made it sound like something was wrong with him. He was fine and he could do this.

Thankfully the nurses were too busy and nobody noticed him walking by and he froze when he spotted another man who was capable of making him flinch. Doctor Kang, he looked anything but approachable in his gleaming white lab coat and he remembered watching the man laugh with his father as they both sold their children without remorse. Instinctively he hid watching the man glare into a hospital room, he almost feared for whomever was the recipient of the ice cold gaze.

Minutes melted by before the doctor finally walked away, his steps clipped and echoing on the linoleum floors and he finally let out a sigh of relief when the other man disappeared around the corner.

Stealthily he rounded the corner and took the doctor's abandoned spot, peeking into the room through the small window in the door. It was that boy again, the idol wannabe but this time he wasn't alone there was a young girl with a bouquet in her arms and a older woman lovingly patting him on his cheeks.

His mother.

A loving one, at that. 

His blood seared watching the domestic scene, jealousy ripping through him like a tornado. There was no way he was letting this asshole have Sujin too, he already had too much. More than he, Baekyung would ever have.

                                                                The motorcycle roars under her thighs as they whip down the road. It only serves to remind her of the first time she was on a bike with another boy, his cologne and the scent of leather infiltrating her senses and making her heart jump through hoops. This time she feels nothing but annoyance and extreme frustration, barely holding onto the stranger in front of her as she leans forward to yell above the engine, "Pullover!"

She knows he heard her based on the immediate tension in his body but he continues to ride ignoring her request demand. With a grunt she grabs onto his waist only to bodily drag them to the side not caring if they both crash at this point she cannot stand another second on this bike with him, instantly he straightens them before skidding to the side and finally pulling the brakes bringing the motorcycle to a halt, the moment the bike stops she hops off in a frenzy.

Thrusting the bottom piece of his helmet up he screams at her, "Are you insane? You could have hurt us!"

She bares her teeth at him, ready to unleash her full anger on him now without an audience. 

"Who the fuck are you? And why did you come to my school?" She bellows glaring poisonously at the strange idiot who had single handedly upended her day.

Moving calmer than she's feeling, he dismounts finally pulling his helmet off and then squeezing it under his arm looking down at her. 

With a condescending look he stares at her, "You know exactly who I am, don't play dumb it's beneath you."

He's right. She does know who he is although she had never seen him or known his name, she had truly thought she could ignore him and he would disappear. Just like with her father that was proving to be an erroneous dream that would never come true. 

"But I'll formally introduce myself since we are going to be engaged soon after all, Baekyung. You can call me oppa though."

Engaged soon.

Her head spins from his words, she feels terror shift over her like a thick suffocating blanket.

"You don't even know me. Why would you even agree to this?" She stares at him in disbelief, at a loss to his acquiesce to their tragic fate.

The look in his eyes haunt her, it's like staring in a mirror and gazing back at the person she was months ago. Somehow without her knowledge or consent she'd changed, grown even and therefore started believing that her life was just that, hers.

"You act like we have a choice. Don't be stupid, we have to just do as we're told. It's easier this way for everyone." He repeats those words that she herself had uttered to Seojun not so long ago, a sense of deja vu washes over her. 

"How is letting ourselves be used easier? Don't you have your own dreams or aspirations? Isn't there someone you actually like?" She knows the error of her argument immediately as she says it, his eyes narrow into thin enraged slits and she can practically feel the anger vibrating off him.

"Don't pretend to care about me. This is about you and your little boyfriend," he spits the word like acid and immediately she remembers those chilling words he had whispered in her eyes earlier, "Do you think he'll be safe?" That was all it had taken for her to go with him, he couldn't get hurt she wouldn't allow that to happen ever. She had no idea what those ominous words meant and how this boy could pose a threat to Seojun but she knew she had to hear him out and protect Seojun anyway she possibly could. 

"He's not the only one you should be worried about." The smug bastard continues with a humorless grin on his face and suddenly the dots connect, her father outside of Ms. Han's hospital room and that calculating look on his face. Her stomach drops.

"Leave them out of it!" She screams embarrassed at the urgent plea in her voice but she can't help it, she's so scared more than she's ever been for herself.

"Well that all depends on you doesn't it? Your dear father will have no reason to do anything to them if you listen like a good daughter and date me as expected."

She stands frozen once again feeling helpless, it kills her inside all her growth slipping down the drain in a matter of seconds.

"Why are you doing this?"

He stills at her question, his cold mask dropping and leaving something numb and unreadable in its place. It feels familiar to her, she awaits his answer with bated breath.

"I want to live, even if I have no control over it. I'd rather be alive."

Thunder clashes above them, the previously sunny day shifting into a gray dark distortion, heavy storm clouds ominously loom above them and the first raindrops land perfectly on her cheeks, crying the tears that she refuses to let fall. She has no more left to cry.

Confusion is an understatement to express Su-ah's true feelings following the mysterious boy on the motorcycle, when she finally gets Sujin on the phone the other girl is quiet and mumbling, evading all her questions and as soon as she mentions Seojun, Sujin shuts down hastily ending their conversation with some nonsensical excuse. 

That was not going to be the end, Sujin might want to play dumb about the true nature of their relationship but she wasn't part of the circus. She was no clown, she had eyes and it was clear that they liked each other and it was only growing the more time they spent together. She wouldn't let her best friend sabotage something that could be great for her, she deserved happiness and Seojun made her happy. So it was truly that simple. 

Stomping up the slight incline to school, she huffs and puffs determined. She was going to talk some sense into the other girl.

Those thoughts come crashing all around her when she sees Sujin coming out of a car, a car that she has never seen before and her questions are answered when the boy from yesterday steps out after her. Every eye in a ten mile radius is watching them, captivated by this new school scandal. Girls already squealing and giggling, envious of Sujin and doing very little to hide their true feelings. 

“Why is he with her? She isn’t even that pretty. He should be with me.” 

The lies people told themselves to sleep at nights, sad. 

Accidentally knocking the gossiping girl to the side with a rough shoulder check, ignoring her dramatic cry she sprints the rest of the way, once again pushing through the crowd to get to Sujin.

Immediately their eyes lock and she begs Sujin for a answers, What happened? Why are you doing this? What’s going?,  she flinches at the cold emotionless stare she gets in response. She watches in dismay as the tall boy bends down as if to hug Sujin and that's when a loud grumble fills the air, she turns around to the all too familiar sight of Seojun on his motorcycle. He revs the handle bar causing the crowd to part like the Red Sea, then he rides slowly until he's right next to Sujin bike inches away from touching her.

With a practiced motion he tugs off his helmet, those sloping feline eyes already on Sujin in a hard stare.

The tension is insurmountable and cloying and Su-ah watches transfixed before Sujin breaks the impasse, tugging her bookbag over her shoulder she stomps into the school without a word to either boys. But then the interloping boy calls out, “Have a good day. Princess,” and Sujin stops immediately at the word, turning around with a ferocious look in her eyes, “Don’t call me that. My name is Kang Sujin to you. That’s all.” Su-ah sees the way that Sujin’s eyes almost subconsciously seek out a certain cat eyed boy and feels like she misses an entire conversation between the two before Sujin finally walks away. 

The mysterious boy glares at her retreating back before shooting a cold glare at Seojun and then promptly hopping back into his car, the backseat as he's chauffeured away.

"Oh my god! That was so hot! Princess?” 

"Who is that? Does Kang Sujin have a boyfriend? Wow, she’s mean to her boyfriend too. What a bitch.” 

Why do you think Seojun looked so angry?"

"Maybe he's worried about losing his bad boy title!"

The crowd erupts around them in loud voices, all curious about what they've witnessed and already creating rumors to appease their curiosity. Suddenly a loud motorcycle screech causes them all to jump silence falling over the crowd before Seojun rides away, the tight clench in his jaw visible even from her distance.

Lunch is a step above awkward, bordering into painful. The easy conversation that used to be a staple of the table is all but decimated, instead everyone eats quietly chilled by the cold air permeating from both Seojun and Sujin. They only speak when spoken to and avoid all eye contact, especially each others. It's painful to be a witness to and she notes regretfully that neither are eating home made lunch today, opting for the school lunch instead.

Sujin had never officially told her but she knew that they were making food for each other, their smiles watching the other eat made it too obvious.

This was serious. Looking at them now they looked like complete strangers, everyone was too nervous to question the elephant in the room. Everyone except poor Chorong.

"Why is everyone was so awkward today? What did you two fight or something? Why do we all have to suffer because of your lover's quarrel? Just kiss and make up already."

The table all looked on with opened mouths except Suho and herself who both looked worried instead.

And people thought she was slow, how had they all not realized what was happening? It was clear as day.

She flinches at his well-meaning words that are evidently not well received by either teen, watching them both glare at the table unmoving and the silence drags out painfully before Seojun breaks the stalemate. Standing without preamble he glares at Chorong before placing the stare on Sujin, it does nothing to change her unaffected stare. With a loud sigh he stomps away, despite his friends dismayed shouts of his name.

She continues to eat her lunch, watching Sujin in her peripheral.

She looks like she has the weight of the world on her shoulder and Su-ah for the first time in their friendship has no idea what to do.

But when they all start to funnel out of the cafeteria she follows the other girl anyway, tugging her into an enclave where they are hidden from the rest of their classmates Sujin cries out at the sudden jerk but loses her defensive stance when she realizes it’s just her. 

“What?”

“What’s going on? Why are you letting that punk bring you to school and why are you and Han Seojun acting like you broke up before you even started officially dating? Sujin-ah, please tell me what’s going on.” She pleads latching onto the other girl’s arm peering up at her with puppy dog eyes, they have never failed her before. 

“I can’t tell you yet, I’m sorry.”

There’s a first time for everything and she frowns at Sujin feeling like there is a mountain between them. She can’t help the hurt that she feels knowing the other girl doesn’t trust her enough to tell her what’s going on. She thought they had moved past all the secrets and hiding but obviously she was wrong. 

“I really am sorry. But I will tell you everything soon enough.”

She releases Sujin’s arm, ready to walk away. She hates being in the dark. But before she can walk away, she feels Sujin hand on the bottom of her sweater tugging her backwards, she looks back with a perplexed glare. 

“Do you trust me?” 

She stares at Sujin and the soft tilt of her head as she asks the question, and her answer is easy, although she has no idea what’s going on and none of this makes any sense to her she doesn’t have to think about that answer. 

"You shouldn't do this to him. It's too cruel." Suho expects a biting retort or even a call for him to mind this damn business, so he's shocked breathless when instead the other girl smiles at him, a tiny almost indecipherable thing that makes her lips thinner. 

"You two have come a long way." Sujin responds unexpectedly shaking her head and walking over to the couch, before beckoning him over too.

He stares feeling suspicious but ultimately he follows, curiosity winning.

"I think I'm ready." Sujin expels a deep breath, twisting her hands nervously in her lap. Before he can ask her what exactly she's ready for she continues, "I want to tell your father what happened if you really think he'll help me."

He's too late to swallow the strangled gasp that escapes from his lungs and he leans back in surprise. He wants to continue his conversation about Seojun but he’s scared to do anything to make the other girl retreat or change her mind now. That conversation will have to wait for another day.  

Sorry Seojun. 

"Are you sure? You're really ready to do this?"

There's a long pause and he watches a myriad of emotions run across Sujin's usually expressionless face until something that looks suspiciously like hope blossoms making her glow brighter than the sun.

"Yes. I want to try living just for me."

Blinking away the moisture in his eyes, he pulls out his cellphone sending his father a message.

Please come over.

It only takes seconds but it feels like an eternity before his father replies, he smiles at the message.

On my way.

He stands up to put the kettle on the fire, he knows that tonight will be a long night and he needs something to keep his hands occupied.

When his doorbell rings he's shocked when Sujin stands up looking at him with a serene gaze, "I'll get it." He only nods at her in reply, watching as she greets his father and man recovers quickly at the unexpected visitor, smiling warmly at Sujin before pulling her into a warm embrace.

Even more surprisingly Sujin doesn't flinch, allowing herself to be wrapped up.

His father embraces him as well, patting him on the back and again on the head when they break apart. He can feel Sujin's eyes on them and he moves away guiltily. Now isn’t the time to rub his burgeoning relationship with his father in her face. 

"Have a seat Dad, thank you for coming so quickly."

His father lifts an eyebrow at the sudden serious tone of his voice but he follows his directions nonetheless folding his hands on his lap and looking inquisitively between the two teenagers.

"Is there something you both want to tell me? Perhaps you two are....." His father motions vaguely between them and he stares back not comprehending until his father smiles slyly and Sujin beats him to it, protesting ardently.

"No! No, it's nothing like that. There's someone else...I mean no. That's what what we wanted to talk about."

He raises an eyebrow at Sujin's slip and his father chuckles at her stuttering and the red blaze across her cheeks.

His father waves his arms in appeal, apologetic grin on his face. "Sorry I didn't mean to embarrass you both. I just always hoped you two might one day. A father can dream."

He scoffs at his father, "Give up on that dream she's like family to me. We would never see each other that day."

Sujin nods passionately in agreement and his father shrugs easily, now looking even more curious than before.

"So what did you want to talk about?"

Sujin stills on her spot on the couch, the determination in her bones seeming to melt away with every passing minute. He fears this won't go as planned and he has no idea how to motivate her.

Then a loud vibration rumbles from the couch and it takes Sujin a moment to realize it's her phone, he watches curiously as she looks at the message and then a single tear runs down her round cheek. The determination curls back around her like armor, he watches in amazement as she sits taller turning to look at his father with newfound courage or maybe it wasn’t newfound but suddenly uncovered by whatever she had seen on her phone. 

“Suho asked you for help for me. I’m really the one who needs your help.” He can hear the slight quiver and hitches in her words but she gets them all out and instantly she has his father’s undivided attention, he even turns his body to fully face the girl. Pride swells in his chest at the sight, he was worried his father would only be adamant about helping him directly as a way to get closer to him but now he can see that he was wrong about the other man. Genuine concern fills every line and wrinkle of time on his face. 

“What is wrong? What do you need help with and why can’t you tell your parents?” It’s a innocent question, and logical too but he fears Sujin’s reaction, when she feels like she is backed into a corner in the past that has led to her lashing out with dagger sharp remarks, he watches with his heart lodged in his throat.

“Because they are the ones hurting me.” 

His lungs deflate releasing all the air that was trapped in the sacs, she said the truth without hesitation and he turns to glance at his father watching him process the bomb that she has just dropped on him. His father opens and closes his mouth several times, before finding his voice it is but a whisper when he responds to Sujin. 

“That time you needed a doctor.” The statement is directed to Suho and with a sober nod he confirms what his father already knows, with a loud sigh his father sinks into the couch quiet rage on his face. “I should have known, you always seemed so scared of him but I thought it was just his parenting style I never thought...never expected that he would....I should have done something!” 

Sujin laughs, it is pained and small but he hears it and immediately turns to look at her, “He sounds just like you like father like son I guess,” Sujin directs that at him and he blushes in memory, he can’t deny the claims. Then she turns back to his father with surprisingly soft eyes, “Don’t blame yourself, just help me now if you can.” 

“I will use all of my resources to make sure he spends his life in jail.” 

Suho jumps in his seat looking over at Sujin, that is way more than they had ever discussed that was what he truly wanted for the monstrous man but it always seemed like too much to ask for but here was his father saying it as if it was completely plausible. 

“Jail? Do you really think he can go to jail? It would be his word against mine, I never took any pictures. I was stupid.” Sujin berates herself, and before he can dismiss the self inflicted insult his father is already moving closer and putting a large hand on her trembling shoulder, only then does he realize how the girl is shaking like a new leaf. 

“No, it will be my word against his. I will also get that report from Doctor Kim, that could be used as evidence. You’re just a kid and a victim, I’ll handle this you don’t need to do anything else. You’ve handled enough on your own, we got you now.” His father looks over at him as if waiting for his approval and he moves onto the couch with them both, after a moment’s pause putting his hand on Sujin’s other shoulder. 

“We got you.” 

Jukyeong glances over nervously at Seojun the aroma of coffee thick in the air as she sweeps up the beans she had clumsily spilled on the ground, she waited for Seojun to playfully scold her as he often did when she messed up at work but the reprimand never came and when she glanced over at him he had been staring longing at his cellphone. 

Su-ah had been the first to notice how weird him and Sujin acted around each other and despite not having a lot of experience with relationships, especially those of the romantic kind she could see that they didn’t hate each other as much as Sujin tried to drive the deceptive point home. They were always teasing each other and Seojun found any excuse to be near Sujin and soon he wasn’t the only one, they just seemed to naturally gravitate to each other at times bickering so much it was like they were the only two people in the room. 

But all that had come to an abrupt end with the sudden appearance of the boy on the motorcycle, the entire school was in a uproar over him, Baek Kyung, she had heard the other girls whispering his name. On paper he seemed very similar to Han Seojun, same bad boy persona and affinity for motorcycles and glares. But the biggest difference she noticed was Sujin's reaction to them both, she had heard from some gossiping girls how vehemently Sujin had declared that Baek Kyung not call her “princess”, a moniker she had commonly heard Seojun use to refer to the girl.  Sujin never stopped him these days, instead rolling her eyes and speeding up to escape from him, he would chase after all calling her the sweet nickname all the way. 

When Seojun would use it to refer to her in passing such as, “Are you gonna eat that princess?” Those were times that Sujin didn’t react at all, simply handing him whatever food in her container had caught his eye that she had ignored. 

They were casually domestic in a way that they never seemed to realize and she couldn’t help but categorize. Seojun liked Sujin that was becoming clearer and it seemed like the feeling was mutual, even if the girl wasn’t yet ready to admit it. 

Which was why this new development came as a complete shock to her, why was Sujin suddenly giving her attention to someone else? 

“Did you guys have a fight? Just tell her you’re sorry.” She offers out of the blue, and Seojun turns to her with a puzzled look drying a mug with a cloth, “What are you talking about now clumsy?” 

Thankfully the shop is empty, she quirks at eyebrow at him folding her arm when he continues to play dumb. 

“Sujin. You guys clearly had a fight, you’re both so hot tempered. Her temper is probably worst than yours though so just apologize okay? It’s better than fighting.” 

He stares at her with a blank face before turning away, rubbing firmer at the mug in his hands and she worries for its safety. 

“Why should I apologize when she’s the one who’s with another guy? Don’t worry about me, I will be fine. Clearly this was one-sided. She doesn’t like me.” 

She openly laughs at him now, looking at him like he has two heads. “What are you talking about? If she didn’t like you then why did she follow you to your mom’s hospital? She tried to be all sneaky but Chorong told us everything. Plus she always gets jealous when other girls give you food at school and don’t think we don’t all know that you guys make food for each other!” 

He whips around looking at her with huge eyes, “Wait you all knew? So when I said that someone special made it for me? You knew?” 

She smiles brightly, “Yep. It wasn’t subtle at all.” 

He sighs in annoyance, turning away to hide the pink on his face. 

“I’m not apologizing. I didn’t do anything wrong.” 

She sighs at the boy’s words, knowing that this fight might go on longer than it needs to and she wishes she could just shake some sense into both of them, why were they choosing to suffer like this? 

Damn teenagers and their angst. 

Grumbling she goes to take a customer’s order, glancing over at Seojun with a final sad smile. 

Hopefully they can figure this out without falling apart. 

Time seems to move slower than usual today and he almost pumps a fist in  triumph when he sees that it’s finally eight and they are free to leave. 

“Do you want to me to walk you to the bus stop?” He offers Jukyeong out of politeness but she shakes her head no, telling him that she is going to meet with her older sister for dinner running out before him and hailing a cab, he smiles at the sight that’s one girl who loves to eat. 

Turning off the lights in the shop, he turns over the “open” sign and locks the door behind him. The cool spring night air brushes against his cheeks and he makes his way to his motorcycle, mounting in one motion and sighing as it purrs to life before he speeds off his destination already in mind. He bobs and weaves through traffic, smirking at idiot drivers who blare their horns at him when he inches too close to their precious car but even they are not enough to rain on his parade. 

When he finally arrives, he bounces off the bike throwing the helmet onto the handlebar carelessly before bounding over to the figure he sees waiting. 

He can’t help the smile that tugs against his lips, ultimately setting it free as the figure turns around at the sound of his boot stomping on the ground. 

“Did you wait long?” He asks moving closer until he can feel the heat wafting off the body in front of him. 

“No, I only just got here too. Why are you smiling like that? You look deranged.” 

He smiles wider, feeling mischievous after what a certain klutz had revealed to him with a smirk he leans closer to her, grinning harder when she leans back looking at him with a confused glare. 

“I heard from a certain birdie that you followed me to the hospital and that you get jealous when other girls give me food. Is that true princess?” 

Sujin growls at him, shoving his shoulder hard before stomping away to the park bench. He eagerly follows after her, throwing his arm over her shoulder smiling at her wearing yet another one of his sweaters, this time a black one that reaches the bottom of her knees and completely hides whatever she is wearing underneath. She looks equally sexy as adorable and it makes his blood boil in a way he has been trying harder and harder to suppress around her. 

“I knew you would try to milk the situation. This isn’t why I told you everything.” 

He smiles recalling what Sujin is referring to. 

Just a day go.....

He stares angrily at his phone in utter disbelief that she would have the gall to call him after what had just happened. She had left on another boy’s motorcycle even though he had asked her not to, he didn’t know what was going on but seeing her leave like that, he wished he knew how to turn off all his feelings for her. No other human should have this kind of power or control over him but here he was ready to burst because she had picked someone else over him. 

“What do you want?” He barks out answering the call with a hard press of his finger and immediately he starts to lose some of his fire when he hears her soft staggered breaths on the other line. 

“Seojun, can you meet me somewhere?” 

He wants to say no, to bitterly hang up on her and tell her that he has someone new too but that would be a lie and he desperately wants to see her and hold her and find out why she decided to rip his heart out and stomp on it.  

Feeling pathethic he answers her with a sigh, “Where are you?”  

Songnisan park. It’s not too far from their school and he hangs up without answering hopping on his bike and riding to her. Maybe it’s stupid but he can’t turn his back on her just yet, he still wants to hear her out even if she’s going to break his heart. 

By the time he reaches the park it’s raining, pouring down in sheets despite the warm weather and he immediately sees Sujin sitting under the downpour while other park goers are running and using picnic blankets as makeshift umbrellas. 

The scenes feels all too familiar and he wonders if this will be their end? Would life be that poetic to have them end the same way they became? 

Sighing he tugs his sweater off, walking quickly to close the gap between them before sitting beside her and thrusting his sweater above both their heads, protecting them from the rain. 

She turns to him with a gasp and he realizes how closely they are sitting beside each other, he can feel her breath when she exhales and it washes over in an intoxicating breeze. He has to forcibly put some distance between them before he does something that he knows he shouldn’t, especially not now. 

“My father knows about us. He saw me at the hospital and I’m scared he saw your mother and sister too. I don’t think I should visit anymore.” 

He pauses to process her words and he feels his chest tighten with anger at the mention of that sub-human, if he ever tried to harm a hair on his family’s head that would be the last thing he ever did. But once the rage passes by he thinks of the rest of Sujin’s sentence, my father knows about us. 

They were an us. 

There was an us for people to know about? 

“Us?” He replies stupidly, unable to stop his heart from fluttering. 

With a sound of exasperation she looks over at him, “How is that the most important thing that I said?” The pretty blush on her face does not go unnoticed but he responds to her statement staying focused, “My mom was discharged today. They said it was just a scare and nothing serious. He can’t do anything to us, if he tries I’ll kill him.” 

He means it, every single word falling from his lips. 

He’s not prepared for Sujin to sob and drop her head onto his shoulder, he drops their sweater umbrella at the sudden pleasant weight feeling the rain drench his hair and shirt instantly. 

“I’m so happy to hear that. I was so worried about all of you.” 

A bubble of happiness explodes in his chest and he’s so close to just letting go of all his anger and holding her, seeing her so worried about his family is almost enough to undo him. 

But, he can’t forget the image of her riding off with someone else. His heart will never forget that ache, that indescribable pain.

“So you care about me now? Is that why you left me like that today? Because you care so much?”

He is being petty, he knows that but he can’t stop the jealousy that is fueling him right now. His green eyed monster is raring its ugly head. 

“That’s the guy you told me to stand up, remember? That’s the guy my father is trying to sell me to. He’s been following us and he knew about you, he threatened you. I did what I had to, I have to do this until I speak to Suho’s father. I think.....No. I’m ready now. I’m going to tell him everything and ask for his help.” 

His heart is pounding erratically in his chest, he can barely hear the rain over the loud thumping of the organ and he can’t believe he ever doubted her, feels guilt twist around him but he pushes that aside to take in everything she has confessed to him, without saying the words she has all but confirmed everything Jukyeong carelessly exposed to him in the coffee shop, she cares about him too enough to want to protect him at any cost. But most importantly she was starting to care about herself, she no longer saw her life as expendable and was willing to ask for help even at the expense of revealing her darkest secret and getting her hopes up. 

Fuck she was the bravest person he knew. 

Without thinking he tugs her into his arms, wrapping her in a tight hug before he realizes what he’s doing but by the time he starts to move back she’s already hugging him back, her arms tight around his shoulder and her head in the dip of his neck and it’s too perfect to stop now. Absently he strokes her wet silky smooth hair and when they finally draw apart, the barest amount of space between them he takes another risk, glancing at her eyes pleading and then smiling when she nods, giving him permission even without knowing what he plans to do, simply trusting him, he leans forward and plants a soft butterfly kiss on her forehead, she hisses in response but instead of moving away she latches on to him tighter. 

“I’m so proud of you baby.” He kisses her again, firmer this time putting all the love and pride he feels for her in that gentle kiss to her brow. 

He expects a lot of things in response to his bold move and the new nickname, a punch, a kick, her loud denial and rejection, he is emotionally prepared for any and all of those reactions, but instead she steals his breath away when she smiles up at him, looking into his eyes and he realizes that she’s looking for permission too and he nods, nervous and anxious to see what she will do. 

With a moment’s hesitation she tugs him down and he goes easily, his heart in his chest and he closes his eyes as her face draws closer to him, his heart is pattering now a crazy thundering mess filled to the brim with anticipation. 

He feels her plush lips against his cheek, the rain making the skin slick and he hums in encouragement as the kiss lingers before he opens his eyes and immediately they are lost in each other’s eyes and he can feel their faces moving closer as if opposite ends of a magnet and he waits for her to stop them, to push him away and run off but she is just as lost as him, moving closer too and when only centimeters separate their lips, a loud crash of thunder booms high above their heads making them jump apart, both flying to opposite ends of the bench. 

“We should...um get out of this rain before we catch a cold.” 

The ride home is awkward and he can barely breathe with how tightly she’s holding his waist but he smiles through the rain, taking care to move carefully on the wet streets not wanting to hurt Sujin and then they are in front of Suho’s apartment, much too fast to his disappointment. 

They both sit unmoving for a few seconds before Sujin releases his waist from her death grip and gets off the bike. 

“Let’s talk over there for a minute.” He states dismounting too and walking over to the scaffold so they can escape the torrential rain for a moment at least. 

They stand awkwardly shivering from the cold in their wet clothes, it’s obvious that Sujin is embarrassed about what happened- their kisses-but he can barely contain his joy, if he were alone right now he would be doing backflips. 

This day as made a complete 180 turn for the better. 

“I have to pretend to date him. We already agreed to come to school tomorrow. He agreed to stop following me if I let him take me to school and go on dates. He has to put on a show for his father too.” She says talking so fast that the words slur together and he wonders absently if she’s nervous? And if so, why? Was she nervous about his reaction? 

He nods in understanding, “Okay. I forgot to say it earlier, but thank you for telling me and not leaving me in the dark. I appreciate it.” 

That’s the logical part of his response, he knows what it took for Sujin to involve him in her plan and how huge it is that she hadn’t wanted him to misunderstand her feelings and motives. But she’s still the girl that he likes and he can’t help the illogical things that flood his mind too. 

“Not on his motorcycle though.”

She looks at him with a deep searching stare and he simply stares back, nonplussed. He knows what he sounds like, a bargaining jealous boyfriend. That’s exactly what he wants to be so he sees no reason to attempt to explain himself, whatever she’s thinking is true and he isn’t the least bit ashamed to admit it. At his unabashed stare she crumples looking away with a barely hidden smile, “Okay. Not on his bike. Even though I never told you that you were allowed to have conditions, this isn’t a negotiation.” She complains but the sting is gone because she has already agreed to his request, he flashes a smile at her. 

“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow. I will have to act jealous, that shouldn’t be too hard.” He winks at her and this time she does try to punch him, he barely dodges her fist. 

Such a violent little thing. 

“I never said you had to do anything.”

He shrugs, “It makes sense. I like you so it would only make sense that I would be jealous if I thought you were dating someone else, plus he will probably want to see that too.” 

She’s as red as a strawberry as she sprints away from him without another word, waving at him over her shoulder. 

He smiles all the way home, before falling into bed after a much needed warm shower, his toes and fingers were like ice chips when he finally got home. 

Remembering one more thing, he grabs his phone shooting a quick text message. 

Don’t let him call you nicknames. Only Sujin. 

Reading it back he determines that the message is a bit too...commanding and if he wants to keep a certain boot out of his ass he better fix it so he swiftly adds:

Please. 

Present time....

“I didn't do anything. She just suddenly started telling me how much you adore me and how you can’t live without me and that I should just forgive you and take you back.” He sniffles dramatically watching amused as Sujin rolls her eyes, before angrily pulling out her phone, he laughs suddenly worried for Jukyeong so he snatches the object from her hands, much to her chagrin. 

“I might have exaggerated about what she said, a teeny tiny bit.” He demonstrates the small amount with his fingers and she glares at him biting out, “Liar,” before snatching back her phone and stuffing it in her pockets with a grumble. 

Getting serious he turns to look at her with anticipation, “How did it go? Were you able to tell him everything?” She is staring out at the horizon, despite him boring a hole in the side of her head begging for eye contact. 

“I hesitated. I lost my confidence.”

He can hear the defeat in her voice and without a pause he opens his mouth to comfort her and tell her how strong she is and explain why this is just a minor setback but next time they can go together and if she needs him to he will hold her hand the entire time and give her every last drop of his support and--

“But then I got a message and it gave me courage. So I told him everything and he agreed to help me. He wants to send my dad to jail, not just emancipate me.” 

She did it. 

She really did it. 

He smiles at her wider than the ocean. 

“You did it, Sujin.”

She stares at him in palpable shock, he immediately knows why it’s not often he uses her name and he expects her to be happy that he isn’t calling her the nickname she is always dismissing, she’s always so adamant that she is not a princess much less his princess.  

“Don’t call me that.” She says finally turning to meet his eyes and he stares back confused because he had only said her name, why was that a problem? Wasn’t that what she had been trying to get him to call her since the first time he dubbed her princess? 

“What do you want me to call you then?” 

He is truly asking but the look she gives him makes him feel like the dunce in the corner of the room and realization unfurls in his body like a slow moving tsunami and he smiles unbridled at the epiphany. 

He hasn’t wanted to get his hopes up by making assumptions about what this is but maybe it’s time that he have some confidence now, he was someone important to her. She had already proved that in so many ways these past days. 

Taking her hand in his, he smiles brightly at her. 

It’s the first time that he has held her hand, and he can feel the damaged skin in his own smoother hand. His heart aches for only a moment, her hands are just like her they might look bruised and pitiful at first glance but beneath the broken surface lurked unimaginable strength and power and just like the rest of her, they were imperfectly perfect. He never wanted to hold another hand, this was the only one he needed. 

“Good job, you did it Princess.” 

She smiles up at him, looking gorgeous-heart stoppingly so-and he can’t help the way his chest constricts as if he didn’t know it already he knows it now unequivocally . 

He, Han Seojun belongs to Kang Sujin. 

[officialthiamlibrary]

Secret Relationship

Still Into You by @cherrysprite

As well as Theo knows Liam, he somehow hadn't figured out that their band's hit song was about him until he was basically punched in the face with it.

[Mature / 3.9k / complete]

A Perfect Match by @xsophie2x

In this world, the first words your soulmate will say to you are written on your wrist. Theo, who's always been eager to find his soulmate, didn't expect this surprising turn of events. Liam, who hasn't been actively looking for his soulmate, is in for an equally big surprise and reluctant to see how it will work out. But maybe surprising, isn't such a bad thing.

[NR / 35k / complete]

Acceptance Is What We Seek by @manonisamelon

Liam's parents divorced when he was a kid, his dad moved to New York and Liam usually go spend some time with him there every summer holidays. This year Theo is coming with him, giving the two boyfriends the opportunity for a much deserved holiday. It is also the year where Liam will finally come out to his dad. There is only one problem. Liam isn't so sure his dad will take the news kindly.

[Mature / 12.1k / complete]

Anachrony by @glittercake

[anachrony- a discrepancy between the order of events in a story and the order in which they are presented in the plot]

 

Ever wonder why, after a group of hunters shot Theo’s truck up, there were no bullet holes or broken glass in later scenes? Or how a homeless boy could afford to fix it? The answer is that it happened afterwards, not during. And here’s how.

[Gen / 7.4k / complete]

The Components Of Sunshine by @glittercake

The story about Theo's struggle with the darkness within, the battle between the blood hungry coyote and the sympathetic wolf. His want for love and light weighed against his need for power. This is Theo's quest for sunshine in a world that has always been dark for him.

[Explicit / 21.9k / wip]

You Still Care by @DarkAngelGirl13

When Theo gets hurt by Mr. Douglas while he tries not to destroy the barrier he realizes that Liam still cares about him.

[Explicit / 11.9k / complete]

The Reckless And The Brave by @purplehoodiesandleatherjackets

When Agent Liam Dunbar, the CIA’s golden boy, goes dark on a mission, it’s up to Theo Raeken, an agent who has been benched for reckless behavior, to rescue not only the agency’s best player, but the man that he loves. With only tech whiz Mason Hewitt by his side, Theo goes into the Argentinian jungle, unsure of what dangers await him in a risky, uncertain, and perhaps most challenging of all, unsanctioned rescue mission.

[TeenUp / 7.3k /complete]

I'm tired of being your secret by @louis_wife505

Liam and Theo hide their relationship from the pack.

Theo is done with hiding.

Liam can't win.

[NR / 979 / complete]

In The Pit by @extrasteps

An illegal “dog” fighting ring that pits supernaturals against each other for money and both Liam and Theo are “dogs” that have different owners and have to fight each other but then behind the scenes wherever they keep them there is secret, soft romance that leads to rebellion and liberation.

[Mature / 6.7k / complete]

One Big Fat Secret by @flyrobin

Basically what the title says.

[NR / 1.9k / complete]

It started in Paris by @flyrobin

Theo and Liam have been in a secret relationship for a while and now people are starting to find out.

Set a few years after the Finale.

Inspired by some things that happened on the show Friends.

[NR / 3.4k / complete]

The One Where Everyone Finds Out by @dunraeken

Liam and Theo have been dating for a couple of months, but the pack doesn't know. This is how they found out.

[Gen / 3.8k /complete]

Liam's Boyfriend by @flyrobin

Liam told the pack he would bring his boyfriend to the next pack meeting. Too bad Stiles is a difficult person.

[NR / 2.1k / complete]

Don't let them see you cry by @tabbytabbytabby

The pack comes back to town for the summer and Theo is having a hard time being around them because he knows a lot of them still don't trust him. Liam finally calls them on it.

[TeenUp / 1.5k / complete]

Trials Of Love by @volsungar-the-mighty

Liam and Theo have been in a secret relationship for the past few years. Liam wants to tell everyone. Theo doesnt.

They get into quite the argument over it.

[TeenUp / 4k / complete]

Saturday Nights by @flyrobin

There was a time when Liam could remember things being better. He was happier. Every Saturday, his dad would take the day off work just to help him practice LaCrosse. And Every Saturday night his mom would make dinner for the three of them. They’d stay up late playing games with each other and go to bed all happy because of all the fun they’d had.

But things changed.

[Gen / 1.4k / complete]

Liam's Trick Gone Wrong by @endraking

Liam has a plan to get away from the parties and get back Theo for always sneaking up on him. It doesn't go the way he expects.

[TeenUp / 1.5k / complete]

Blizzard by @flyrobin

Trapped in Peter's cabin in Washington due to a massive Blizzard sweeping the mountains, the pack makes the best of there time away from Beacon Hills. They play games and try new foods. Even Theo and Liam get a little time all to themselves. But, of course, there always has to be some kind of drama with the pack, doesn't there?

[TeenUp / 2.9k / complete]

Dirty Little Secret by @flyrobin

Liam had to come out and tell everyone his dirty little secret.

[TeenUp / 1.3k / complete]

It's a secret by @bookwyrm07

“Who are these guys or girls you're hooking up with anyway? I never even see you dance with anyone,” Mason asked, and wrapped his arms around around Corey's waist.

“Oh!” Corey bounced a little, “I bet he's been hooking up with the same person. Like every time he slips out, and whenever we have a date he says he has plans. I bet he's got a fuck buddy.”

[Mature / 2k / complete]

Smoking Hot by @li0nh34rt

Liam and Theo keep their relationship a secret until an unexpected event leads to even more unexpected events.

(Very ominous.)

[Gen / 1.6k / complete]

I'll Hate The Goodbye by @purplehoodiesandleatherjackets

In a world where you can get a device implanted on your wrist that will count down to the exact second you will meet your soulmate, a lot of the guessing is taken out of the love game. For Liam Dunbar, a devout believer in the Timers, however, it’s more complicated. He got his Timer when he was 14 years old, but 10 years later, it’s still blank, and he’s starting to feel desperate. When he meets a ruggedly handsome bartender who thinks the Timer’s are nothing more than a self-fulfilling prophecy, and refuses to ever get one, Liam finds his world, and his search for his soulmate, turned upside down.

[TeenUp / 5.9k / complete]

(Not so) Blind Date by @volsungar-the-mighty

Theo agrees to go on a blind date that Corey set up for him, despite his on going (and so far, secret) relationship with his room mate Liam. Things go... better than he thought.

[Mature / 8k / complete]

Five Times They Were Almost Caught And One Time They Were by @voidsterek

Everyone realizes that Liam is acting weird. He hasn't been paying much attention, he's been slacking off in school, and he skips out on practice.

They all notice small things but decide not to comment on them.

[Gen / 2.1k / complete]

Unholy by @lovelylittlegrim

Liam can't keep himself from wanting Theo even though he really, really shouldn’t. Theo doesn’t seem to mind though, he loves secretly pulling Liam into rooms to make him beg for it. Especially, when there’s the chance of being caught.

[Explicit / 39.9k / wip]

Rivals by @mskristinamay

Like, they don’t even play the same sports, but both teams don’t take the other really serious and they constantly prank each other and make fun of each other. Theo, captain of the Football team, and Liam, captain of the Lacrosse team, and they both claim they can’t stand each other and it would be all so easy if it weren’t for the fact that both find their counterpart more than just attractive and maybe one of their screaming matches on the field ends with them furiously making out under the shower after everybody else is gone.

[NR / 89.9k / complete]

[musicalluna]

a long, lonely while, part iv

for @theappleppielifestyle

--

Bruce knows a thing or two about being touch-starved. The first year after the Other Guy had happened, he'd been shaky and ill near constantly. He was depressed, and caught everything and anything. He'd known before his isolation that a lack of human contact could be detrimental, but it hadn't prepared him. It was like trying to comprehend pain like a kidney stone or birth before experiencing it. Nothing could have conveyed its true awfulness. Human contact had been a luxury he couldn't afford and he had suffered for it. When he'd honed his control and started trying to help and make up for the endless destruction he'd left behind him, he'd fluctuated between being repulsed by the slightest touch and over-lingering. The casual touches had eventually become routine and he stopped having the adverse reactions. Longing for more had taken longer to deal with. Starting his work doing medicine had helped there. A steady stream of taking pulses and feeling foreheads had been a big relief. The point is, when Tony breaks up with Pepper, Bruce recognizes the symptoms after just a few days. It's also pretty apparent Tony's more deeply affected by it than Bruce has ever been. He needs more than the casual touches of a friendship or acquaintance, which becomes particularly apparent after the fifth time Tony dodges the hand Bruce tries to put on his shoulder—even though he immediately looks like he regrets it. It smacks of a problem with history older than Bruce's. These days Bruce is good at accepting and enjoying the touches bestowed on him, but instigating has never been his forte and he can't quite make himself step out of that comfort zone, even for Tony. The other Avengers are always around, coming and going from the communal kitchen or the communal gym—they're all lonely, every one of them seeking out the presence of other people, if not direct contact—and he expects that they'll see the need and fill it better than he can. But one month turns into two, two months turns into three, and Tony looks more and more wretched with every passing day. “Bless you,” Bruce murmurs when Tony sneezes one afternoon and swears under his breath, one hand moving to press against the arc reactor. He's been nursing a cold for over two weeks and it's starting to worry Bruce. The now-audible wheeze in his breathing is especially concerning. “Thanks,” Tony mutters and puts his head in his hands. Bruce sets aside his notes. “Have you had anyone look into that?” Looking up at him with watery, red-rimmed eyes, Tony says wearily, “What, my sniffles?” Bruce nods. He's trying to tread carefully, but that's not exactly his specialty. “Why bother? Their advice is always the same—rest, drink fluids, pop a few Advil.” Tony shrugs. “Do you— Would you mind if I had a look?” Bruce is surprised at himself for that and apparently so is Tony—he looks up, eyebrows raised. “Knock yourself out,” Tony says with a smirk that has a shadow of his usual attitude behind it. Bruce clears his throat, then gets to his feet and moves over to where Tony's seated because he's committed. Think of him as any other patient, he tells himself and that helps settle him. He reaches for Tony's wrist first, curling his fingers around it to check his pulse. “How long have you been feeling under the weather?” “Coupla weeks.” “Symptoms?” Tony's skin is slightly clammy and his pulse is fast, so there's that and— “Headache, general aches, coughing, sneezing, chills on and off. Fatigue. You know. Sickness.” Bruce lets go of Tony's wrist, frowning slightly. He has a stethoscope around here somewhere and he'd like to hear Tony's lungs. “Two weeks is a long time for a cold.” “You're telling me,” Tony mutters. After looking in just two places, Bruce manages to find the stethoscope. He hooks it in his ears and gestures at Tony. “Can you lift your shirt?” “Things don't sound the same in there with my little attachment, you know that, right?” Tony says, but he lifts it up all the same. Bruce is careful to school his expression and not to stare, even though the sight of that hunk of metal embedded in Tony's skin makes him feel a little nauseated. “I'll never know if I don't try,” Bruce tells him and flashes him a little smile. “I can see your biology boner, and, boy, it's a doozy.” “Shh,” Bruce murmurs, distracted by the noise of Tony's chest. The arc reactor makes a steady thrumming noise that nearly drowns out the sound of Tony's heartbeat and breathing, but after a minute or two of listening, Bruce is pretty sure he can make them out well enough. “Take a deep breath,” he asks. Tony humors him and breathes in as deeply as he's able—it makes him cough with a crackling sound that Bruce knows immediately is bronchitis. The coughing doesn't stop for nearly two minutes, and by the time it's over, Tony is clutching Bruce's arm, gasping frantically for breath. Bruce may not be a touchy guy, but he puts a hand on Tony's back and rubs it, trying to provide what little comfort he can. “There you go,” he says as Tony finally wheezes his way back to a normal breathing pattern. He cups his hand around the back of Tony's neck and Tony's head sinks down to rest on Bruce's chest like the mere weight of it is too much. “You need to be medicated,” Bruce says and Tony breathes, “Sure.” He doesn't move, and Bruce doesn't make him. It's not a solution for Tony's depressed immune system, but it's something. Bruce doesn't know how, but the touch starvation needs to be addressed. Tony can't—and shouldn't have—to go on like this.

[citycfangels]

text: raquel ⇄ charlie

Raquel: so I have good news and bad news so which do you want to hear first?

Charlie: i would tell you to tell me the bad ones first so the good ones sound even better, but i'll let you choose

Charlie: is everything okay?

Raquel: Oh, I'm okay. Everything is okay.

Raquel: and I probably should have just said I have news. And I sort of have to give you the good news to explain the bad news.

Raquel: So the good news is that I talked to my agent and he wants me to get more exposure and with a bunch of random events coming up they want me to go to them and schmooze up people and just get my face out there more.

Raquel: bad news: you might just have to put on a monkey suit and come with me to events.

Raquel: I mean if you want to go at all.

Charlie: oh, that sounds really good. it'll do you good, considering that, from what i know about that business, is that you need to get your face out there to succeed.

Charlie: i see a couple of problems with that: 1) i've never worn a suit so i know nothing about suits, 2) i don't own any and 3) i'm not swimming in money to buy one.

Raquel: yeah that's sort of what they said. They said that they feel like they can market me and that they can get more buzz around me if more people know what i look like and if I'm able to do more print and commercial ads which I'm okay with. Just looks like I might have to dip back into my "modeling" contacts and maybe even do more music video like things.

Raquel: 1. I've never worn a suit either so we're in the same boat there but there are people who know about them and I'm sure we won't have a problem trying to find one 2 and 3. Your girlfriend has money. Your girlfriend wants this because there is no one else she wants near her at these events so that's not something you have to worry about.

Charlie: that may be a good idea. the more face exposure and contacts you have, the better.

Charlie: you know how i feel about letting you pay for my things, but if that's what you want, i'll let you pay for the most expensive suit we find. i can't afford one right now so i'll let you buy me one.

Charlie: but i don't have to look like a fucking penguin, right?

Raquel: This could work for the both of us somehow. Maybe this can get you exposure too. Like later on once the bar is open.

Raquel: I know how you feel about it and I don't want to step on your toes but you should know that there shouldn't ever be a time where you need to worry about money. Besides suits are investments. No you don't have to look like a penguin.

Raquel: Besides I think a blue suit would look perfect on you.

Charlie: yeah, that'd be helpful.

Charlie: okay, it seems i haven't gotten used to it already. i will try to not worry about money ever.

Charlie: how are suits investments exactly?

Charlie: thank fucking you bc i don't want to look like a fucking penguin. i mean, i'd look hot with a suit but that's not my style at all.

Charlie: we'll see about it, i have to try them on when we go shopping. no tie or anything like that?

Raquel: and I promise that I'm never going to like shove money in your face and it's not like I'm suddenly becoming your sugar mama or something.

Raquel: Suits are an investment because they're a gentleman's armor. And yes I did take that from a movie but they're an investment because you can use them more than once AND they just make any guy look really sexy. They're sort of a necessity now.

Raquel: I'm only saying no tie because then I'll just keep thinking about how much better it would look around my wrists tying me to the headboard. or about how you can use it as a blindfold.

Raquel: and it would just distract me throughout the night. I'd just keep pulling you in for a kiss with it so really i'm just saving you the trouble.

Charlie: if you say so, then i'll take your word and i'll keep a couple of suits on my wardrobe, just in case i need them. plus, we both agree i'd be hot as fuck in a suit.

Charlie: i shouldn't be surprised that you're having such kinky thoughts because a simple tie would distract you all the time.

Charlie: i wouldn't mind you pulling me in with it and kissing me, but i guess we have to keep the pda to a minimum, right?

Raquel: I do say so and it'll just be good for you to have. There might be a lot more events later on once my career does pick up and there's no one else I want by my side. I think you look hot in everything and nothing so i'm pretty biased.

Raquel: what can i say? I've had someone corrupt me and it's not like I'm going back now.

Raquel: I can always use the ends of your jacket for that. I don't think we'll have to keep too much of it down. They haven't said anything about marketing and sex appeal and all the typical stuff so it's not like they want me to seem single.

Raquel: I don't think I could do that anyway. Denying that I'm with you would be denying my happiness and denying how important you are to me and I'm not going to do that.

Raquel: Ever.

Charlie: we'll, i'll keep a couple of them then, mostly because i'd look hot in them. you're not so bad yourself, with and without clothes

Charlie: mmm, i wonder who corrupted you. now i'm tempted to buy some and see what can we do with them

Charlie: babe, if you ever have to make it look like you're single for a while if that makes you look better in hollywood's eyes, you know i'd support you because i want you to succeed and make it.

Charlie: it wouldn't be the ideal and i wouldn't be happy about it either but

Charlie: let's hope we don't have to do that

Raquel: well with the whole clothes thing you should expect a lot more dresses. I know sometimes we just get dresses and suits on loan so that will hopefully keep our closet from exploding.

Raquel: I wonder who did. He must be a really cheeky and incredibly handsome person. Tempted to just buy ties so that you can use them on me? I might like that. A lot.

Raquel: No.

Raquel: I don't want to be the type of actress that is marketed like that. I am with you and I don't need to deny that not when I know how talented I am and how hard I have worked. I can have sex appeal and that attraction and still tell people that there is someone important in my life. I don't want you to become like one of those hollywood partners that gets bothered because of my job but you aren't just going to be someone they can erase. I won't let that happen.

Charlie: our closets. we don't share one, babe

Charlie: yes. i might do a research on what to do with ties in the bedroom department

Charlie: how the fuck did i get so lucky to be dating you?

Raquel: right. We don't.

Raquel: only if I get to tie you up too.

Raquel: I don't think you're that lucky. Maybe I just think you deserve more than you think you do.

Charlie: i don't see why not.

Charlie: sometimes i think i don't deserve you, or at least i didn't deserve you a while ago. still, i think i'm lucky

Raquel: you don't see why we don't share a closet now???? Because we both have our own places which is us respecting each other's spaces and knowing that sometimes we might want to be alone and because my stuff would totally cross over to your side so it's really all just for the sake of my clothes that we don't.

Raquel: Wait you meant don't see why I wouldn't be able to tie you up with a tie. Right.

Raquel: well that just means I get to ride you. Take control. That you can't even smack my ass or hold onto me like I know you love to. It means you just have to lie there and let me take care of you until you cum inside me.

Raquel: baby you deserve the world.

Charlie: ... you okay?

Charlie: damn, i love touching your ass while you ride me, but the idea of you on top of me while i do nothing... fuck. now we're getting ties for sure

Charlie: so do you, babe. but that's how i feel, sometimes i think of who i was in the past and i surely didn't deserve you then.

Charlie: that means i did something well

Raquel: so that's all it took? The thought of me riding you to be convinced? Maybe I should just find things to tie you with and have my way with you tonight.

Raquel: who you were in the past wasn't some awful person. You just weren't sure of what you wanted and that's fine. And even if you think you didn't deserve me then you still had me. You always did.

Raquel: you're not the only one who did something right. You are so much more than I could have dreamed of. Someone who loves me as much as you do makes me the luckiest person in the world.

Charlie: i was already convinced when i imagined your wrists tied together and me fucking you hard, but that is also a very convincing argument

Charlie: let's see what you have, i'm sure you'll find something

Charlie: i wasn't a bad person, but i was pretty much a fuckboy who got around a lot and i'm sure that you didn't want a fuckboy around you

Charlie: when did we become so cheesy?

Raquel: add a blindfold to that and I'm totally in.

Raquel: either I find something or looks like I'll have to run into some department store and get what I want.

Raquel: you did sleep around a lot and maybe I didn't like that and it's why I tried fighting off how much I liked you but we would have still been friends and I would have had you around then.

Raquel: you'll always been this cheesy so I don't know what you're talking about lol.

Charlie: i'm thinking of something we could do and i really want to do it

Charlie: you're a resourceful woman, but i hope you read something about bondage, what to use and what not

Charlie: i guess you're right.

Charlie: i'm pretty sure i wasn't cheesy before dating you and you were already cheesy back then

Raquel: well you can't just tell me you want to try something and then not tell me. Spill.

Raquel: don't worry. I won't try anything crazy and I definitely would never hurt you.

Raquel: i just think I'm glad that we didn't just stay friends.

Raquel: lies. i don't accept that.

Charlie: i'm thinking of getting you naked, blindfold you and then have my fun with an ice cube. i think you'll even thank me for it

Charlie: that's good to know, thank you for not hurting me while we do kinky shit in the future

Charlie: me too. things wouldn't be as great as they are for us now

Charlie: you're the lying one, i wasn't cheesy. i had a way with words to flirt with girls but i wasn't cheesy

Raquel: don't I always thank you? Or at least reciporicate.

Raquel: well I doubt we need to go as far as you know making a safe word or something but I think I know when I'm pleasing my man.

Raquel: so you'd go through it all over again? The ups and the downs? Everything?

Raquel: you can be a flirt and still be cheesy, but maybe you're right we have gotten overly affectionate. Maybe we're just in our "honeymoon" phase.

Charlie: you do in the best way possible and i fucking love it

Charlie: yeah, it's not like we're doing hardcore BDSM and i'd tell you if it was too much anyways, but yeah.

Charlie: well, we've been through too much and there's a long way ahead of us, but yeah, i would.

Charlie: see? i told you i wasn't cheesy before you. you made me a bit cheesy

Raquel: now I'm curious to know which it "the best way possible"

Raquel: yeah we just have a really healthy and active sex life. We're just like light bdsm. I just trust you enough to tie me up and fuck me until you cum inside me.

Raquel: long way ahead of us? Are you planning hurdles for us?

Raquel: you're the nacho chip underneath the really cheesy nacho. You got second hand cheese.

Charlie: with more sex, of course

Charlie: a very active sex life, i may add.

Charlie: no, i meant that if we're dating, something has to happen, right? especially if this is meant to be a long-term relationship

Charlie: okay, we went from being cheesy to talk about nachos in a minute, wtf

Raquel: of course how could I have thought it could be anything else.

Raquel: well we're both young and consenting and incredibly hot. I don't think anyone would be surprised to know just how healthy our sex life is.

Raquel: I guess, but I think things are pretty great right now and that maybe we shouldn't rock the boat for a bit with any progression. This is meant to be long term. There's no giving up on this.

Raquel: I like to keep you on your toes baby, and we said I was the nacho cheesy one before so really this should come to no surprise.

Charlie: neighbors are more than aware of that. they probably hate how loud we are but i don't care

Charlie: yeah, we're in a good place and hopefully things will stay like that for a while.

Charlie: i'm not surprised and i'm hungry now. i want nachos

Raquel: well good because it's not like I'm your neighbor's biggest fan either.

Raquel: I just have to keep telling myself to.not screw it up

Raquel: do you want me to pick some up on my way home?

Charlie: i know, and as the person who lives at the other side of the wall, she fucking knows how loud we are

Charlie: hopefully none of us will. i don't want to screw it up either

Charlie: Mexican?

Raquel: I don't even want to talk about her. It's like saying beetlejuice. If I mention her again chances are I'll run into her later today.

Raquel: can we just promise that we won't walk on eggshells around each other? Besides, your track record in this relationship isn't as bad as mine so odds aren't in my favor.

Raquel: well I definitely don't just want chips with cheese and I went to the gym so I am just going to have some of yours.

Charlie: okay, let's not talk about her. but i doubt you run into her because you mentioned her, babe

Charlie: maybe, but that doesn't mean i could still screw it, who knows? but yeah, i can promise that

Charlie: and will i have to watch you not eat properly and get all the energy for possible fun afterwards? not in my house.

Raquel: well it's either because I mention her or because life is teaching me patience and tolerance the hard way.

Raquel: There aren't too many things that can really make you mess up so bad for me not to forgive you.

Raquel: I will have energy. You can't just make up rules now.

Charlie: well, if it happens remember i'm dating you and try to not punch her

Charlie: yeah, but still. let's hope i don't do any of them

Charlie: my house, my rules. no kale for dinner. please?

Raquel: violence doesnt solve anything. I don't even think I know how to punch someone.

Raquel: I'd like to think you have self-control and know that any of the things I'm thinking of would hurt me and us more than anything.

Raquel: I need to see a copy of these rules before I agree to the terms and conditions. NOT ALL OF MY SALADS ARE KALE.

Charlie: i didn't peg you as someone who could punch someone anyways.

Charlie: i have. i like to think i can control myself

Charlie: do you want me to write them so you can see and then sign them?

Charlie: okay, bring your salad but you're eating mex with me.

Raquel: You make me sound like a chihuahua that's all bark and no bite and even then my bark must not be that scary

Raquel: yep I want to see them and I won't just click a box like I do on every other terms and conditions thing.

Raquel: just a few chips but not a bunch. I'm not losing all the work I put in at the gym.

Charlie: you're prettier than a chihuahua, babe

Charlie: we can redact them together later and make copies.

Charlie: that's enough for me. i just really want you to eat something that isn't green for once and look happy while eating it

Raquel: well I hope I am. Otherwise I really wouldn't know what you're doing with me.

Raquel: shouldn't you be doing that on your own? It is your apartment.

Raquel: I never said I don't like my salads. But I think you worrying about my eating habits is cute.

Charlie: i would be with you if you were like a chihuahua, but it doesn't hurt that you're prettier and hotter than one

Charlie: we can always make a contract on foods whenever we're at the other's place... sort of.

Charlie: i don't want you to think you need to control what you eat around me. i don't think it'll do you harm either if it's not in excess.

Raquel: chihuahuas are annoying on top of not being cute. Whatever Paris hilton sees in them I don't. Also that was a little cheesy. you pretty much just admitted that you'd be with me no matter what I looked like.

Raquel: sort of?

Raquel: Babe, I don't think that. I just have liked how my body has changed and I never thought that I need to control my eating habits around you or anyone. Is that what you think Nathan did???

Charlie: that was what i was trying to say. you're welcome

Charlie: a sort of contract, i mean

Charlie: i wasn't thinking about your ex at all until now

Raquel: well that doesn't go the same for you. I am vain like that.

Raquel: I'm kidding. I don't think there's any way I could not be with you.

Raquel: okay we can do that.

Raquel: okay.

Charlie: awww, that's cheesy too.

Charlie: let's say you can't bring here anything that includes kale and then i can't eat something at your place, for example.

Charlie: okay what? he wasn't doing that, right?

Raquel: still don't regret it.

Raquel: so you'r just going to outright ban my kale? What if I just get a smoothie and it happens to have kale in it?

Raquel: No. Do you think I would be with someone like that? Nathan was a good guy.

Charlie: i know you don't

Charlie: in that case you can, since it's in a drink

Charlie: no, i don't think so. if someone made you do that they're idiots

Raquel: okay so what are my kale's requirements? It seems like you have a deep rooted vendetta against it.

Raquel: I wouldn't just do something just because the person I was dating asked me to.

Charlie: not a vendetta, but i don't really like it. we'll talk about it while redacting this

Charlie: good, because i would punch that person if they made you do that. i don't really want you to do or stop doing something just because someone tells you to do it

Raquel: still sounds like a vendetta. What did my kale ever do to you?

Raquel: you'd punch that person? And that wouldn't solve much. Punching someone is never the answer.

Charlie: i don't know, but i don't like it.

Charlie: i mean, i could but i wouldn't really do it, i would... just think about punching them.

Raquel: okay I won't have you eat anything you don't want to but I just think it's funny how you're against the one thing I eat a lot of now.

Raquel: my big strong man. I think it's cute when you get a bit protective.

Charlie: now i feel bad for banning kale at my place

Charlie: well, i know my girl can take care of herself, but i can't help it, babe

Raquel: well don't feel too bad. I won't miss it that much.

Raquel: as sexy as it is that you want to protect me, you're right that I can protect myself even if I don't know how to throw a punch. Besides I would never want to put you in a situation where you could ever get hurt.

Charlie: right now, i'm trying to imagine how would it be if you knew how to throw a punch

Charlie: awwww, babe.

Charlie: what if we took boxing lessons together? just to teach you how to throw a punch

Raquel: Boxing lessons????

Raquel: I don't know. I just wouldn't know why I would need to throw a punch.

Raquel: but are you sure you can keep up with me in the gym in general? And don't give me the whole I work out too thing because I think i still work out more than you do.

Charlie: i don't know, i think it's always good to know how to throw one, just in case

Charlie: babe, please. of course i can keep up with you, and i think i work out as much as you do, only that i don't do it at a gym.

Raquel: just in case Im attacked or something??? I'm always in well lit areas, I hardly travel alone at night, I have a boyfriend with the muscles of a greek statue, and I like to think I don't need to prepare for something I doubt is going to happen to me.

Raquel: that's a whole lot of talk, I want to see action.

Charlie: okay okay. i wouldn't go to the greek statue level, but i'm flattered you think that

Charlie: is that a yes to boxing lessons or are you just challenging me?

Raquel: I said what I said. I'm not taking it back.

Raquel: oh I am totally challenging you and maybe to boxing lessons.

Charlie: oh no, don't take it back. i like your confidence and i liked what you said about me, so don't do it

Charlie: bring it on, babe. let's see who can keep up with who.

Raquel: well good because I wasn't going to

Raquel: challenge accepted. Let's see if I can test your endurance even more than I already do.

Charlie: i have stamina, so it'll be easy. i can last, and i'm not only talking about sex

Raquel: Of course you aren't. I don't doubt you in the bedroom but in the gym is where I'm going to have you beat.

Charlie: oh really? do you want to make things more interesting?

Raquel: yes really. Let's make things interesting then. What are you willing to wager?

Charlie: except money and my apartment, i'm willing to bet anything, included anything sex related

Raquel: I don't want your money or your apartment. I have my own thank you. Okay if I win you have to take me out on the cheesiest and slightly romantic date that could end in sex if you're lucky. And if you win which is highly unlikely you can get whatever you want.

Charlie: the cheesiest date ever. fuck, that's tough for me.

Charlie: whatever i want? does that include trying out a new sex position?

Charlie: i'll do my best to not lose the bet then

Raquel: you can always try a new position. You're not making for a very interesting wager. You're so going to lose.

Charlie: i could always come up with something more interesting, like

Charlie: eat a whole pizza with me or something. i'll probably come up with something better once you lose.

Raquel: ULTERIOR MOTIVE TO MAKE ME GAIN WEIGHT. THIS IS SABOTAGE.

Charlie: I'LL THINK OF SOMETHING NON-SEX OR FOOD RELATED

Charlie: just because i love you and i don't want to be that mean

Raquel: OKAY.

Raquel: I love you too.

Charlie: okay, bring your cute ass over here and bring mexican for dinner.

Charlie: i love you

Raquel: so demanding. I'll be right there. 😘😘😘😘