#also because english is not my first language so it's scares me that people won't understand what i wrote

[littlehaize]

can't believe i'm actually writing a long fic

haven't done that in years

i have no plan, i barely have ideas and clichés

i go with the vibe and feeling

dbh fandom, be scared, i'm arriving

[firstfirerebel]

𝕳𝖎𝖘

Sumary: Tom Riddle is obsessed with reader and won't tolerate her being somewhere else than his side (Reader is against the hate on Muggles or Muggle-Born wizards)

Pairing: yandere Adult!Tom Riddle/Voldemort x fem! reader

Warnings: Dark content, obsession, mention of the three Unforgivable Curses, implied kidnapping, death, yandere, toxic behavior

Time: First Wizarding War (meaning Voldemort/Tom is still a normal man)

English is not my native language!

I DO NOT SUPPORT OR ROMANTICIZE YANDERE BEHAVIOR!!!

"Why won't you just understand that all I want to do is create a new world, a better one. One were you, and I will rule together!"

"But I don't want that! In fact, I don't even want to be near you! I'll never join you nor support you. Just give up already and let me free!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was another day in the Malfoy Manor where you were captured by none other than the dark lord himself. And another day, where you just hoped to escape or die. Sounds harsh? Listen to your story first...

You have known Tom since your Hogwarts time. You weren't in the same house but in the same year, and even though you weren't close, you did happen to have some lessons together. Never you would've considered him a friend. He was just a classmate who sometimes helped you with potions, and in your free time, you sometimes met him in the libary by coincidence, but that was it.

Yeah, you did find him attractive, but you would have never thought to date him or something like that. After all, he always wanted to be alone and didn't like company. You also preferred being alone, to be honest. Still, he somehow scared you from the beginning. His eyes hold no emotions, but in his actions and his aura, all you felt or saw was pure hate. Tom didn't talk about his past, but he didn't have to for you to figure out that it must have been no good one.

Once you were in sixth grade, attacks on muggle-born students happened, and in the end, Myrtle, who was a friend of yours, was killed.

Yeah, she was very difficult , but she didn't mean any harm towards anyone. Besides that, she was bullied by so many students that you just felt pity for her. You were also bullied in your first years at hogwarts until the students stopped out of nowhere. Since then, you have had problems with being social. Most people who were close with you ended up using you for their own benefits or saw you as their therapist or something like that.

Okay, Myrtle was known for being over sensitive, but still, if people knew she would cry because of mean comments, then why make them? She was in her third year when she died, and she only flew to the girls' toilet because Olive Hornby made fun of her again, which made you more sad about her death. It's not like she chose to have glasses. What was wrong with some people?

In the end, Riddle accused Hagird of being responsible for her death. Only you and Proffesor Dumbledore were convinced that it couldn't have been Hagrid. He was way too nice and kind-hearted for such a terrible crime as murder. Though you didn't think it was Tom either.

But it didn't matter. Hagrid was suspended, and that was the end of it.

Since that time, you didn't trust Tom Riddle anymore. He was the one who made everyone believe that Hagird was guilty. And somehow, since the incident, Tom's aura has become even more intimidating and dark. At least that's how it felt to you...

Once you graduated, you didn't hear of him again, which didn't bother you at all. You lived a peaceful life for a long time. You loved your job. You had true friends. You could do your hobbies. And sometimes you even went on a few dates.

But, if it would have stayed that way, you wouldn't be at Voldemorts' side against your will, would you?

The day that ruined your life was a rainy day. It wasn't too cold nor too warm, so you decided to take a walk in the nearby woods. You loved to spend your time there. All the creatures and plants fascinated you every time without fail. Sometimes, you even saw unicorns, which felt like a miracle everytime Besides, it was one of the last peaceful places left.

War would soon come. It was only a matter of time. Everybody knew that. Maybe you only had two months left, or you still got two years. No one knew except the ones on Voldemorts side.

At that time, you only knew that 'The Dark Lord' was a user of the dark arts. And he hated Muggles and Muggle-Borns. Which was enough for you to despite him. Dark magic was never something you approved, and you didn't care about the blood status of anyone. What mattered to you was always the person.

Usually, the woods were filled with life and joy, but that day was different. The forest looked intimidating from the outside, and you even thought about going back home.

Sadly, you didn't listen to your inner voice. But, it wouldn't have changed your fate...

Once you entered it, you didn't hear the happy cheers of the birds like always. And you didn't see any nifflers running by or other creatures in general. Something was definitely wrong.

But you continued to walk, which would soon turn out to be a fatal mistake. As soon as you reached the river, that was in the forest, you realized why everything was so different than usual.

Death Eaters had chased and killed a Muggle-Born witch with her family. They were on a camping trip, as you could tell from the scenery. But there was still a girl, most likely two or three years old, still alive.

Without a second thought, you hid behind a big tree and some bushes around it.

It seemed like the Death Eaters didn't know what to do with her. Maybe she wasn't part of the plan? At first, you thought that this was not an important mission for them, but then you saw Bellatrix. She was very well known as Voldemorts' right hand. She personally learned dark magic from him and was definitely the most loyal Death Eater there ever was. So this must be a really important matter.

You couldn't stand her guts and wanted nothing more than to just slap her even if you didn't know her in person. Dark magic wasn't something you supported. But still, you couldn't deny that she was dangerous and powerful. Her madness didn't lower that fact.

Since dying wasn't on your to-do lost today, you ran away as fast as you could. Since they were arguing so loud, they didn't hear you. Of course, you wanted to help the little girl, but it was simply impossible to get her without getting caught. And against a whole troup of Death Eaters with one being BELLATRIX, you didn't stand a chance.

But luck wasn't on your side...

As you ran away from the horrible scene, you ran into a Death Eater. They wore their typical black clothes and their mask was on, so you didn't see who it was.

Before you could grab your wand, you heard an angry mumbled 'stupor'. You fell onto the ground and blacked out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you awoke, you didn't dare to open your eyes. After all, you got caught by a death eater, so you being alive was a miracle. You didn't hear any voices around you. It also wasn't cold and wet around you, so being locked up in a cellar wasn't the case as well...

Beneath you was a comfortable mattress. It was soft and made you want to fall asleep on it. But what the hell was this all about?!

If you're caught by the bad guys, you normally don't wake up in a soft bed. Did they bring you back home? No, that would be too risky. Maybe they wanted some information, but you weren't really someone well known in the wizarding world.

Patiently, you waited a few more minutes, but still not even the slightest noise. So you opened your eyes.

You were in a dark room. The main colors were black and dark green. Black wardrobes and black walls. The bed was made of black wood, but the sheets were dark green, the big carpet on the floor as well. No one was with you in this room. Desperately, you wanted to know where you were. From the colors, you would have guessed that it was a Slytherin Dormitory in Hogwarts. But kidnappers don't bring you to your old school!

Scared you inspected the room once again. Nothing was familiar...

You took a deep breath and stood up. If you would die, fine, but as long as you had the slightest chance of escape you would take it.

The carpet felt also really expensive beneath your feet. By the way, your kidnappers were so nice to pull off your shoes before laying you into bed...

Everything in this room seemed to be just made for this specific room. Which frightened you even more.

Suddenly, the door was opened, and you saw a pretty woman (walking down the street 🤣) in the doorframe. She was slim and tall, had long blonde hair that was tied up in a bun. Her tight dress was rose gold with a black cloak over it. All in all, she looked like a wealthy woman. Her face was pretty as well, but she looked like she got a dung under her nose. Weird.

"Get up and follow me, My Lady," her cold and clear voice told you.

"Uhm, I'm not your Lad -" but she was already on her way to your goal. You had no clue where it was, but following her was better than sitting around, right?

"I know this must be really confusing, but our Lord will explain it to all of us soon. I was just told to get you and call you that. Now, please, don't make this harder for us than it already is,"

You managed to catch up to her. Now you also saw that her eyes were ice blue. Matching her cold voice.

"Who are you?" you asked softly. Kowing her name could be a good hint to where you were.

"Narcissa Black, soon to be Narcissa Malfoy," the woman didn't look at you for one second, her eyes were focused on the walls. So you were still in the claws of the death eaters. Family Black was well known for their puryity, not a family you would have gotten along with.

The corridor was huge by the way. Dark colors still dominating. Only the chandelier was white. Did this belong to one person or was it the headquarters of Voldemort and his minions or what? Instead of getting awnsers you only got more questions as you walked after Narcissa.

Downstairs. A few steps upstairs again. Left. Left again. Right. Straight forward. The second right.

Was this a house or a Labyrinth?! How were you supposed to find your way in here? You even got lost in Digeon Ally!

But after what felt like an internity, you both reached a large black table, people gathered around it. A tall man stood up from his chair as he heard you two enter. As he turned around, you saw your old classmate Tom Riddle, but if he was here, he wouldn't help you. If he became a death eater, he was behind after everything you swore to fight. He wasn't an ally or a friend anymore. He was a danger and a threat to you and many innocent people who weren't here.

You tried to hide behind Narcissa. After all, she was the only person who seemed at least a little trustworthy, and she was another woman. Maybe she knew how unsafe you felt because mostly men were in this room. The only other woman was a mad Bellatrix, never ever you would trust her.

"Ah, there they are. Come in, " Tom spoke. His voice had changed, and it was more intimidating than it was before.

You didn't move an inch, but Narcissa started to move forward. Being all alone without someone to hide behind was more scarry, so you followed her, but you were still behind her.

"Oh no, don't be afraid. No one here will even dare to glare at you, my dear. They knew the punishment would be worse than death," You couldn't recognize Tom anymore. The hate in his presence, his voice, his appearance, everything scared you. Back in school, you didn't fear him, at least not for his house or his roots. Just because he was a Slytherin, it didn't mean that he was evil, but now? His opinions were completely different than yours, and this was not a stupid novel of the stereotype enemies to lovers cause he was just plain and simple wrong with his thoughts on muggleborn or muggles in general.

[Funfact: I don't get the hype on this topic, see, for being autistic I got bullied for many years and than reading a story about two people hating each other's guts and than falling for each other just feels wrong for me, you can read whatever you want ofc, this was just my unpopular opinion]

Still, you hid behind Narcissa, but as she tried to go towards a man with long blonde hair and her crazy sister, you felt completely defenseless. The only person you used to know seemed to be the head of everything here, and Narcissa wasn't at your side anymore. Sadly, Tom saw your fear. He went towards you and pulled you in an unwanted hug. Softly, he petted your hair and whispered sweet nothings. As soon as this horror hug ended, he smiled at you and turned towards the others.

"If anything should happen to her, everyone will be held responsible! You know the punishment, now go! We are done here!" As the last word fell, everyone disapparated, and only you and him were left.

And then you realized it. If he could order the death eaters around, he must be the dark lord himself. Tom Riddle, your old classmate, was Voldemort.

You backed away from him but regretted it soon. Tom didn't take rejection good...

"Why are you scared? I won't harm you. In fact, I am the one who has kept you safe since I saw you!"

"Are you mad?!" You yelled back into his already mad face. Wrong choice again. In full rage he stormed through the room and kicked everything in his way. Chairs and even the whole table practically flew through the room.

"Who protected you from those bullies back in Hogwarts?! Who kept you safe from all filthy boys who just wanted to break your heart?! Who killed the mudblood Myrtle so you were safe from her?!"

So Dumbledore was right... Tom opened the chamber of secrets all those years ago. And killed your friend.

"Myrtle was my friend! I never asked for your personal protection, Tom!"

Somehow that calmed him down! Yep, that man was a complete psychopath...

"But you didn't have to, my dear", he ran towards you and cupped your cheek while looking into your eyes.

"Keeping you safe will always be my priority. I loved you the moment I laid eyes on you and I knew that I would always protect you. Look around, here in our mansion you will always be safe. No one will ever harm you again. We'll be safe here! After I've won this war you and I can live here in peace. Just imagine it, I'll make us so many horcruxes that we won't ever die. Here we will raise our kids and they'll never go through the pain of being an orphan like I was", pain and hate was in his voice at the simple thought of 'death' and 'orphan'. But having a family with this insane man? Hell nah, you'd flee the moment you got the chance!

"I know now this is scary for you, and you might think of escaping, but this whole mansion is surrounded by death eaters, the moment you even think of fleeing you'll be brought to your room and trust me, I know how to punish or torture someone so that no mistace will ever happen again",

And that's how you ended up here. Behind you was the man that claimed to love you fast asleep. Yet he was the one who made you go through all of this. Most traumas you had were because of his action. If this was love, than you could already drown in it.

You had no idea if you could ever escape or if even the try of escaping was a good idea. This man wasn't well known for his kindness or his patience.

Maybe playing along would make it easier, but would your mental health take that well? Or would that make him do worse things 'out of love'?

Still, you rethought your first actions towards Tom, trying to figure out what made his obsession start. Was it your look? Your hairstyle? Your body language?

Or was it just being unlucky?

[reirasheadcanons]

UPPER MOONS X READER (ONESHOT)

Featuring: Akaza, Douma, Kokushibo

Cw: none, just some cute headcanons, English isn't my first language, so I apologise if I make any mistakes.

Hope you enjoy!!

note: mention of having a family, kinks and alone time.

Akaza:

He is awkward towards any women expect you. He believes you both get along very well which is the only thing that matters to him. He have never told you that, but sometimes he is dreaming of you both having a family.

He enjoys giving you gifts of any kind. "Hey doll, do you want me to bring you anything when I get back?" "A-akaza you don't hav-" "I'll bring you something, see you later."

He has a lot of trust issues that's why he ALWAYS gets you together in missions (even if a hashira is around).

It may sound stupid, but he truly believes in love at first sight. So basically when you first caught his attention, he wanted you. "Do you love me?" "Of course I do! Are you dumb?" "Looks who's talking, you are really getting ahead of yourself, aren't you love?"

Once you told him Douma scares you, it was the last time Douma has heard of you. (Akaza was really proud of himself for that).

Even though he is a demon, he doesn't want to give you the impression that he ACTUALLY eats humans. (he starves himself when you are around).

Douma:

He is a psychopath and you know it. "When I get back from my temple, want to go outside and haunt people?!?" "Douma I don't want to." "B-but I-" "No." Your answer was clear. "Fineee only because it's you 😊"

"Hey, hey y/n! Lord Kibutsuji told me I did good!! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT??" One answer, you couldn't. He always gets excited when he gets praised. "Good job Douma, good job." You pat his head sweetly. From now on, he is the happiest demon alive.

He hated when you talked about other upper moons in front of him. "Douma, isn't lord Kokushibo so cool?" Silence. "Aren't I cool enough for you y/n?" You knew that attitude. He was being jealous. And you knew that Douma being jealous isn't the best thing.

Other than that, your boyfriend had a very weird and unusual kink. He loved painting your nails for you. Red, blue, yellow, it doesn't matter. As long as his darling is satisfied.

In your alone time, he enjoys hugging you. You can't say no to him. You know he won't listen. He wants for himself. He is the only one who can claim you. What a man huh.

Once, he saw you hanging out with Akaza and he quickly joined. Sometimes you say to yourself that it's better without him.

Kokushibo:

Something about this man drives you crazy. His eyes, his scent, his aura.. and yeah. You eventually found out that he accepted Douma's offer and he stared wearing perfume. You teased him A LOT when you found out.

As lord Muzan's favourite upper moon, he has to stay in missions more than usual. He always knew how to pay back for that. Gifts, dresses, food. Everything to satisfy your needs and to win your heart. "Moonlight, I brought you this dress do you like it?" Of course you did.

He had a really ward time to talk/communicate with the other upper moons, which really caused you anxiety. "'Shibo, do you get along with the others?" Silence. "I do." "No you don't", "I do.", "No.", 'Yes." That kept going for a while.. You knew he was trying really hard to talk with them. You also knew he hated it when they stared at you.

When the other upper moons found out about your relationship with Kokushibo, you were in serious danger. Although lord Kibutsuji didn't even paid attention to it, the others did. You decided to stay away from them and only wait in Kokushibo's temple. As it's normal for a human, the infinity caste scared you a lot.

It is believed that Kokushibo is a really tough demon. When it comes to his nightmares he isn't the same. He once saw his twin brother on his sleep, something that caused tears in his eyes. You didn't know much. You only knew his name was Yorrichi. After all, you weren't even allowed to call out that name. You stayed close to him, hugging him, telling his it's going to be alright. He was so glad to have you.

He was really insecure of his looks. And that's the main reason why he didn't want to be seen with you. A goddess like you, with a monster.. what could the world think? It didn't matter to you. He was yours and you accepted him.

HOPE YALL ENJOYED IT! I APOLOGISE IF IT'S TOO SHORT!! SEE YOU NEXT TIME<3

[starstruckmoony]

Hello! May I request a muggle AU with Theodore, with this meet-cute prompt: "they're on opposite sides of a wedding party to the bride and groom" (prompt is from @/thewritersafterglow on Instagram). Thank you! I know this request is in good hands :)

aaaaaa thank you anon! <3 this is the first request i've got in a while (again tysm it made me very very happy <3<3) and i had lots of fun writing it so i hope it meets your expectations!

can't help falling in love.

masterlist , requests

pairing - theodore nott x reader

trope/tags - muggle!au, strangers to lovers-ish, fluff (side note - this isn't particularly realistic because i don't really know how weddings work in different parts of the world, so i kind of just went by how they function in my country and some bits and pieces i've managed to pick up from movies and such. i know it probably won't be accurate for everybody but i tried my best LMAO)

word count - 3k

warnings - language, drinking, smoking, cheesy at the end

when you recieved an envelope in your mail one fine morning in late may, you never would have expected it to be an invitation to your primary school classmate's wedding in the english countryside. you could still recall the wonderful memory of choking on your coffee and scaring the life out of your poor cat when you saw her name plastered in big letters in the center of the paper, right below a picture of her and her fiancé. it was a miracle how she remembered you existed. to be frank, you were kind of honoured, and you made sure to confirm your arrival almost immediately. hell yeah, you were coming. free food and alcohol? who in the right mind would pass on that?

so about three months later, sometime in mid-august, you found yourself inside of a crowded venue, sweating buckets in your silky green dress, without a fan, or anybody to keep you company. a few of your old classmates were there too, but not a single one of them bothered to offer you a greeting. what a bunch of arseholes.

you stood leaned against the wall in the very back where there were fewer people, attempting to cool yourself down by fanning the air around you with your hands as you waited for the godforsaken ceremony to finally start. to nobody's surprise, the bride was a little late, and the groom's family was in a mild state of disarray. it was kind of funny, but not as funny as it would have been if you weren't feeling so bloody hot. do they not have air conditioning in here? how do people get married in these conditions? and why does the best man look more terrified than the groom?

the loud sound of somebody's shoes scraping against the tiles right next to you shook you right out of your train of thought, and you placed your hand against your chest in horror, "jesus christ." you muttered under your breath, the unfamiliar man attempting to catch his breath scared the life out of you.

he glanced at you for a split second, appearing rather exhausted (aftermath of sleeping through five alarms and having to run to the venue because his friends were too lazy to wait for him), "sorry." he offered you an apology breathlessly, leaning back against the wall to steady himself. you thought that you were being overdramatic when it came to the heat and the current atmosphere of the wedding, but this man seemed to have surpassed you. he was rather handsome though, despite being drenched in sweat from what you assumed was running, also paired with the humid air inside. his eyes were strangely captivating, and he looked a little too good in that suit of his for it to be considereded legal. were you staring? you were probably staring. you trailed your eyes away, pretending to be entertained by the groom's father who was attempting to explain the situation to the guests. you cursed inwardly, realising that you'd be stuck in there for a long time.

you turned to the pretty guy again, deciding that you should, perhaps, talk to him, "you don't look like you wanna be here." fantastic start. those probably weren't the words he wished to hear in those circumstances, but your observations didn't seem to annoy him at all. he actually chuckled instead, "am i that transparent?"

"quite." you responded a little too nonchalantly than intended, taking a quick glance at the door in hopes that you'll see the bride come in. nope. you returned to your original position. how wonderful that was, more waiting.

"do you have any water in there?" the man spoke again, pointing at the purse you had tucked under your arm.

you took it in your hands and peeked inside, knowing that you most likely wouldn't have what he was asking for, "no," you shook your head, but continued rummaging through it, "i have this, though." you pulled out a tiny bottle of liquor and shrugged before shoving it into his face.

he didn't hesitate to grab it, he would have taken anything that was liquid enough. he drank it all, not that there was much, before handing the bottle back to you with a scowl. he coughed a little as the alcohol burned his throat, and you couldn't help but snort. 

"i don't know how smart that was." it wasn't, really, since it would only dehydrate him more, but it worked for the time being. he coughed again, falling back against the wall, finally able to breathe somewhat normally.

"you'll find out in a few hours," you didn't miss the smile that painted his features, and it encouraged you to carry on, "how do you know the bride... or the groom?" you questioned, wanting to keep the conversation going to kill at least some of the remaining time you had. you were bored out of your mind.

"the groom," he nodded briefly, "we went to college together, funny bloke, he invited me and my two other friends who are... somewhere in here," he stretched his neck as his eyes scanned the crowd for a short moment, "eh, whatever." he shrugged, and then reached into his pocket, but quickly retrieved his hand. it was still empty. you had assumed he reached for a cigarette before he was able to remember where he was.

"you won't go looking for them?" you queried, finding his neutrality over the whole situation slightly bemusing. it wasn't every day that a hot guy like him ditched his friends for you, and it was rather pleasant to think about. he was hoping he wasn't being so obvious about it, but you read him a little too easily.

"what, bored of me already?" he questioned, a hint of playfulness in his tone.

"i might be, now that you said that." you scowled in pretend disgust, drawing a breathless laugh from him. you shortly sunk into a not overly uncomfortable silence, both internally debating with yourselves about whether you should keep it going or not. you were kind of drawn to each other, after all. the consequence of attending a wedding without a date must have had an influence on it, you told yourself. he mustered a similar, lame explanation.

"i'm theodore, by the way." he decided to break the ice after a while, and you almost sighed in relief, "y/n." you shook his hand politely.

"nice wedding." he added, his face scrunching at the sight before him. the sarcasm in his tone was obvious.

"delightful, isn't it?" you offered the older lady that passed by you a forced smile, and then eyed her giant pink hat judgementally. you and theodore resembled a mean high school couple who had an opinion on absolutely anyone and everything, just standing there, laughing amongst yourselves and making fun of all the other guests and their stupid pastel outfits. it made sense why your classmates hadn't approached you, but you didn't let them occupy your mind any longer. you found yourself a like-minded companion for the night, one that was ten times funnier, and the prime example of eye-candy.

"imagine she never shows up." theodore said after you shamelessly fed one another with some interesting past gossip about the bride and the groom. judging by what he had told you, those two were a match made in heaven. and you could say that with your whole chest.

"god, don't plant that idea into my head. i spent my last three paychecks on this bloody dress." you snorted, dusting it off when you noticed that it had got a bit dirty.

"it looks perfect on you, though." theodore's little compliment took you off guard, and he must have noticed judging by the way he grinned.

"thanks." you felt yourself blush a little at his comment, and just as you were about to open your mouth to speak again, the bride's mother burst through the door, announcing that her daughter would be there shortly. you exchanged a relieved glance with theodore, fucking finally.

despite the long wait, the ceremony played out quite beautifully. the couple exchanged their vows, humourous and tear-jerking all at once. people laughed, people cried, somebody's baby did both. the best man hadn't forgotten to bring the rings, and the maid of honour looked happier for the bride than the bride. nobody backed out last moment, and nobody objected after the infamous "speak now or forever hold your peace". you left the venue with a smile on your face, pleasantly surprised.

theodore and his friends offered to give you a ride to an even larger venue where the reception was being held after you told them that you had arrived with a cab, and you happily accepted their offer. the two idiots he came with were just as unserious as he was, and you had soon found out that they all attended the wedding with the same intentions as you. eat food, get drunk (and then sleep in the car because mattheo wants to get wasted but doesn't want to run them off the road and kill somebody in the process).

the reception, thankfully, moved a lot faster than the ceremony. by some sheer dumb luck, you had been instructed to sit at the same table as theodore, lorenzo and mattheo. your shitty classmates were there too, so you assumed that the table was designed specifically for that - old friends from school that the newly weds didn't talk to very much, but still liked them enough to invite them.

so, after the grand entrance, loud clapping and cheering, a cute speech from the bride, more clapping and cheering, the best dinner you had had in a while, a few more emotional speeches, and even more clapping and cheering (hollering this time, too), the dj finally showed up. it was the part of the night you had been the most excited for. the first dance was absolutely beautiful and even brought a few tears to your eyes, but god, the moment you heard an onset of lower-than-nightclub-quality music blast from the speakers, your hopes had all gone down the drain.

the dance floor filled up in a matter of seconds, and you had never been more appreciative of the existence of wine. not a single song that was played in the span of fourty-five minutes was your cup of tea. and as different people's requests kept incoming, it only got worse.

theodore seemed to be having the same problem. mattheo too, considering he had about five shots in less than half an hour. lorenzo wasn't doing much better either. he was entertaining himself by making paper planes out of tissue paper and leaving them on the table like a strange art project.

"this music is terrible." theodore's voice was completely drowned out by the godawful sounds coming from the speakers, you couldn't hear a thing he was saying.

"what?!" you shifted a bit closer to him, covering one of your ears with your palm to subdue at least some of the noise.

"i said that this music was terrible!" he tried not to shout, but it would have been impossible for you to comprehend whatever he had said if he hadn't done so. yes, it was fucking awful. many people would disagree, considering how many of them were still on the dance floor, either fully wasted already or slowly getting there. at least the newly weds were having a good time, both slightly tipsy too.

"tell me about it!" you yelled back, rolling your eyes. you considered asking him to accompany you outside, for a smoke or something, though you didn't really need an excuse. anywhere would have been better than in there. but you chickened out before you were able to speak, continuing to sip on your wine in silence. silence, that was funny, mostly because of how unbearably bloody loud the music was.

lorenzo suddenly stood up, and he yelled something into mattheo's ear. the other stared at him in confusion, and then burst out laughing into his face. he turned to you instead, and you saw his lips move, but didn't understand a thing he was saying.

"huh?!" you and theo yelled out in unison, and lorenzo waved his hands dismissively at you, defeated. he pushed his way through the crowd on the dance floor and shuffled over to the dj. he threw an arm around the man, probably trying to make some friendly conversation. they seemed to be getting along.

perfect. you reached for the wine bottle, refilling your glass and taking large gulp. you were hoping that lorenzo had enough charm to sway the dj into playing something else. it took about twenty minutes of insignficant chit-chat for the man to finally nod and give him a thumbs up, and that's then the beginning of dancing queen blessed your tortured ears.

you gasped in shock, immediately getting up onto your feet and latching onto theodore's arm. he didn't really protest when you tugged at his sleeve and pulled him to the dance floor which got even more crowded than it was before. mattheo managed to fall out of his chair, but he followed the two of you and joined you in the mass of people.

"thank me later!" lorenzo yelled your way before a pretty girl grabbed his attention. the night got so much better from then on. the dj appeared to have whipped up a large playlist of abba's work, since the songs were playing one after another, each one bringing your mood up. you had completely blocked out anything that had happened before you heard the tune of the first song, and you had only returned to the table with theodore to refill your glasses before running back to the dance floor.

you couldn't recall the last time you had that much fun, singing your heart out, jumping up and down, showing off some ridiculous moves, letting theodore hold your hand and spin you around. the dj stuck to the same genre for a while, playing old pop songs, keeping everybody on their feet. some of them you didn't know, but you weren't about to sit back down after doing so for almost two hours, so you danced to them too nevertheless.

that is, until your legs started hurting a little too much for it to be tolerable and your throat had got a bit sore from belting several songs with the bride. your head was spinning too, courtesy of having so much wine. theodore took the opportunity to ask you to accompany him outside (because he really needed a cigarette) after some slow tune neither of you were familiar with had been put on.

you nodded your head took a hold of his hand as he led you out the door. you clumsily made your way down the stairs, laughing as you did so. the effects of alcohol were beginning to show themselves.

as fun as it was, getting out of there for a short while was a need. you slumped down onto one of the stone benches placed outside the venue, sighing comfortably as the chilly breeze of the night cooled you down.

you immersed yourself into another casual discussion, not a very significant one, as neither of you could even stand properly for too long without stumbling, but it was nice breather from the wild atmosphere inside. you liked talking to theodore, and even with your clouded thoughts, you knew you'd want to see him again after this. there wasn't a doubt in your mind.

"i thought i'd have to leave early." theodore laughed to himself as he took the last drag from his cigarette, and then tossed the burnt out stub onto the concrete.

"and make me stay here all alone?" you teased, although you probably would have left too if it wasn't for lorenzo and his skillful flirtation tactics or whatever the hell that was.

"who said i wouldn't bring you along?" his response made heat rush to your cheeks, and you put your head down with a breathless chuckle. you were quiet for a moment, trying to recollect your thoughts.

"you know, this might sound a little weird, but," you chewed on the inside of your cheek, not really able to think straight. you were tipsy, after all, "i'm glad i met you today," you tilted your head to the side, drunkenly observing him, "you're nicer than i anticipated." as backhanded as it sounded, that was the best you could do.

it was theodore's turn to blush after you said the words, and it didn't manage to go past you, despite him trying his hardest to hide it.

"yeah, i mean no– it's not weird, i'm uh," he trailed off, contemplating whatever it was that he wanted to say next. honestly speaking, he didn't know how to put it into words, "i'm glad we met too, you're–"

one thing that theodore hated was tripping over his words and not being able to be blunt with somebody he took a liking to, which is why he was so, very grateful to hear elvis' can't help falling in love coming from the inside of the venue.

you looked up at him when you realised which song it was, waiting to see if he'll ask you to dance. and he did, but he didn't lead you back in through the door like you thought he might. you stayed outside in the light wind, slowly swaying to the music, his hands on your waist and your arms around his neck.

you liked it better that way, just the two of you in your own little world with nobody else to disrupt you. you let your head rest on his shoulder, and his grip on your waist tightened just a little bit, like he was making sure you won't leave him. you smiled to yourself, god, that was the last thing you were planning on doing.

[weirdsht]

Longing - LoTCF & Molan! Reader

notes: There's so much I want to include here but it's so long already... I might make a part 2. Also I woke up and decided to change the way I address reader lol. I used to use _____ because it was easier to type but I've decided to go for aesthetics now (disillusioned will still have the same format though so readers won't be shocked with the change).

tags: female reader, death, blood, injuries, angst(?), hurt/comfort

English isn’t my first language so there will be grammatical errors

Pls don't repost my work anywhere without my permission

Constructive criticisms and any kind of interaction are more than welcome

Requests are open and welcome

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[Name] Molan was about to fall asleep when intruders suddenly infiltrated the Molan Estate.

“...Mom I’m scared.”

The 5-year-old clutched her mother’s skirt. Screaming and clashing of weapons can be heard throughout the house.

Her mother said nothing at first. Opting to get her greatsword from underneath the child’s bed first.

“Baby you started learning stealth techniques with your brother right?”

[Name] nodded as she felt her mother squeeze her hand.

“Remember what Dad taught you okay? You might have to use it tonight. Think of it as an exercise to see how well you’ve learned.”

The situation is scary, but despite that [name] feels calm because her mother is smiling at her.

But that doesn’t stop her hand from shaking as she hears their family members’ screams.

Slowly, the mother-daughter duo slithered out of the bedroom. Their main goal is to find Ron and Beacrox before escaping the estate.

Run, hide, roll over, they did everything just to avoid the eyes of the masked people attacking their estate. As they run away corpses of their family members and servants can be seen everywhere they go. The stench of their blood overtook [name]’s senses making her want to puke.

Everything seemed to be going well at first. However, they have been discovered after a few minutes of sneaking around. It was inevitable. With every corner being surrounded by those mysterious people massacring the Molans.

“[NAME]!”

[Name]’s mother just hadn’t expected one of those bastard’s swords to pierce the child’s chest instead.

The Molan Mistress was surrounded. She was trying her best to fend off everyone who dared to hurt her child.

But her efforts weren’t enough.

One of the enemies still managed to slip past her greatsword.

At that moment Beacrox, her first child, entered the room they were in. His eyes were shaking along with his legs as he ran to hide behind her mother.

“Beacrox take care of your sister.”

Her voice was calm. Fitting as the wife of the Molan Patriarch. Her hand tightly clenched on her greatsword. Eyes fierce, their gaze holds a promise of protecting her children.

Meanwhile, Beacrox sat on the ground. His arms cradled his baby sister while also trying to apply pressure to where she was hurt.

“Orabeoni… it hurts… it really hurts…”

“Just hold on a little longer. Father will get here soon.”

Beacrox’s hands are covered in blood. [Name]’s blood. No matter how hard he tries he can’t stop the bleeding. He can’t stop his younger sister’s body from going cold.

“Orabeoni… Orabeoni…”

[Name] tried to lift her small hands, but was too weak to do so. Beacrox shushed her, reassuring her that she’d be fine. That she’ll make it through the night. That they’ll get out of here alive.

She has to. Beacrox doesn’t think he’ll ever be the same if his baby sister dies here.

“I’m scared… Everything hurts.”

Beacrox is scared too. Scared of the copious amounts of blood escaping her little body. Scared of her body slowly becoming colder as the seconds fly by. Scared of her eyes that are slowly fluttering themself close.

“Hey, hey, you can’t sleep yet. We have to wait for Father first okay?”

Despite all of those things, the Molan heir stood strong. He has to. He needs to be strong enough for the two of them.

[Name] tries hard to follow her brother’s orders. However, the task starts to feel impossible to accomplish as time goes on. Sleep tempts her, tells her that if she closes her eyes the pain will disappear.

Her surroundings became more and more hazy and her family's voices grew quieter until she couldn’t hear them anymore. She was fighting to stay awake despite her body desperately shutting down.

“Dad…”

She mumbles as she sees a blur of a person that she thinks she recognizes as her father. 

“It’s okay. Everything is okay now. We’ll get out of here.”

Ron tries to reassure the girl but she can’t hear him anymore. He pressed his fingers on her pulse desperately trying to find one. Once he found it he asked his son to monitor the pulse as he aides his wife.

Bathump

“Baby stay with me. Dad’s here now. Dad will get you out of here.”

Thump

“[Name] you can’t close your eyes. Beacrox try to keep her eyes open!”

thump

“Mom! Dad! I- I can’t! I can barely feel her pulse. She’s also not breathing anymore!”

…thump

“Run. I’ll handle it here. Go with your father!”

“But what about [name]???”

“...It’s too late for her…”

…thum…

…

Only then did Beacrox let go of [name]’s wrist. Even after removing his hand, he felt like he could still hear it.

Her last pulse.

The feeling of it lingered in Beacrox’s hand. He clenches and lets go of his hand, but still…

Still, he could feel it.

Even as he runs away while looking at his father’s back. Even decades later when his serving the Henituse family as a chef. 

That feeling never goes away.

Meanwhile, the one left at the Molan Estate is still fighting. Desperately fighting the intruders with all her might.

She knows she’s outnumbered. She knows that she will die at their hands. She knows she has no fighting chance.

But still, she fights.

In hopes of buying her husband and her son time. In hopes of letting them escape and live to see another day.

And as she expected, she didn’t last long. After a few minutes of swinging her greatsword, he had finally succumbed to her wounds. Her body fell on the ground of what used to be their home. Of what used to be a safe space for her and her family.

Luckily, they left her alone after that. Figuring that she’ll die on her own either way. It gave her a chance to crawl over to her daughter. Gave her the chance to hug her one last time before her inevitable doom.

[Name]’s body was still bleeding. It had slowed down considerably thanks to Beacrox’s efforts but it was still bleeding. But her mother didn’t mind. She didn’t mind the puddle of blood gathering underneath her daughter’s body.

She just wants to hug her child one last time.

That’s why she ignored everything. The sticky blood, [name]’s cold body, her own ragged breathing. She ignored all of it and imagined that they were back in her daughter’s room. That she’s just hugging her daughter to sleep after telling her a bedtime story.

…thump

Ron’s wife wasn’t sure if she heard that right.

…thump …thump

She pressed her ears closer to [name]’s heart and heard the faintest of pulse. It was almost nonexistent. 

But it meant that there was still hope for her daughter.

Gathering her strength. She draped over her body on top of her daughter. This effectively hid her and put pressure on her wound.

She didn’t know if her daughter would survive. But she knows that she won't. This is her last ditch effort to make her daughter live. The only thing she can do with her dying body.

Kissing the crown of her sweet baby’s head for one last time, she let her body finally succumb to its wounds after fighting for so long.

Gasp!

[Name] gasped awake from her sleep as she dreamed of that night again. It’s been a few years since then. She has somehow managed to escape with her limited stealth skills at that time. Managed to go outside the borders of the Molden Kingdom in order to live.

For the first few years, she had to live on the streets. It was a sudden change. From having her own room and servants to barely eating one day a meal. But still, she persevered. It’s what her mother would have wanted.

She has nothing on her except the clothes on her back. She can’t even use her real name anymore for fear that someone will recognize it. 

However, she did have her father’s teachings.

It may not have been much as she was just starting out before their family fell apart. But she still practised them every chance she got. Tries to expand what she knows by remembering what she has read and her experience while living on the streets.

“You’re already taking another job? Go out and play or something! You’re too young to be taking job after job!”

Her hard work paid off in the form of her being a mercenary. She used her skills and wits to qualify for such a dangerous job. In turn, she became a full pledge mercenary at the young age of 12.

Every mission was life-threatening. She never knows if a mission is going to be her last one. But it puts a roof over her head and a warm meal on her plate.

“Nalom, why do you take so many jobs? You already have enough money to last you for at least 3 months.”

One of the mercenaries ruffled her hair but she ignored it. Focusing her attention on the name she was called.

Nalom…

The opposite of Molan.

Cheesy. She knows it was cheesy to make her alias just the reverse spelling of her last name. But she feels like she will inevitably forget her real name if she doesn’t do it.

She might have lost everything that night but she promised herself that she’ll take revenge one day. It doesn’t matter how long it takes, she will get it done.

Hence why she takes job after job. Honing her skills and pushing her limits. Trying to discreetly sniff out any information about the secret organization that attacked the Molans.

“Bud I heard we’re going on a war with Arm?“

The now 27-year-old [name] sneaked behind Bud.

“Nalom! How many times do I have to keep telling you that you’ll give me a heart attack if you keep sneaking up on me like that?”

[Name] ignored the Mercenary King holding onto his chest as she waited for an answer.

“Yes, the veterans will attack their secret base in a few days.”

“I’m included right?”

Bud Illis looks at her as if she’s joking.

“Of course you are. You’ve been here for 15 years. There’s no way you’re not a veteran.”

Good.

That way she’ll finally get her revenge.

“By the way. Is the investigation about our first base done yet?”

[Name] could see Bud’s shoulder tense at the question. She honestly didn’t care much. It was devastating that it had been blown up and the directory is now gone but it’s not like anyone from their side died. So it’s not her problem.

Well at first at least.

Until she heard the rumours that the one who attacked the directory was Molan’s last patriarch.

“Not yet. I wasn’t there when it happened and we’re putting all our efforts into the upcoming attack that’s why the investigation is taking longer.”

She could sense that Bud was only telling half the truth but she let it go.

“Say Nalom, did you learn your stealth techniques from someone?“

The Mercenary King asked just as she was about to go out of his office.

“No, I learned during my time living on the streets.”

A half-life. It was only fair since Bud also lied to her.

With that [name] closed the door behind her making her unable to hear the conversation that happened in her absence.

“Her techniques feel similar to Patriarch-nim…”

Bud mumbled under his breath once the stealthy mercenary was gone.

“It’s different but their foundations are similar.”

Glenn agreed from the couch. Both of them wondered if there was a chance that Nalom was somehow connected to the Molans.

“Where’s the kid?”

One of the mercenaries asked as they prepared to attack Arm’s secret base.

“I don’t know, you know how Nalom is. I’m sure she’ll be fine.”

Another mercenary reassured the guy.

“Nalom? Who’s that?”

Cale asked Bud who was also trying to look for the missing mercenary.

“She’s our youngest veteran, only 27-years-old. But she’s the best among the mercenaries when it comes to stealth.”

Bud checked one last corner before sighing and giving up.

“She was here just a second ago… Well, it’s not like she can’t handle herself. But she has never gone on her own during large-scale attacks.”

The Mercenary King decided to trust the missing mercenary and continued with the original plan.

“Who goes there!?”

Beacrox hears a familiar yet foreign voice ask him as he dodges a flying dagger.

“I should be the one asking you…”

Brown hair that was the same shade as his own greeted him. Her one hand preparing to throw another dagger while her other hand was clutching on a flag that had been drawn on.

22 years. It has been 22 years since he last saw his little sister. His last memory of her was her body growing colder in his arms as he felt her pulse slowly stop.

Even today he could still feel her pulse linger in his hands.

“[Name].”

Beacrox called out. If only he knew that it was the first time in 22 years since anyone had called [name] by that name. 

He could see the mercenary stop in her tracks. Her arm lowered as she processed his voice and the name he called her.

“Orabeoni?”

She asked and Beacrox nodded. Yes, it’s him. It’s her orabeoni. 

[Name] slowly walked towards him. Her steps slow and staggering. Almost falling in his arms once she was close enough.

“It’s you. It’s really you. You’re alive.”

She cried in Beacrox's arms and for one he didn’t mind that his clothes were being tainted. He’ll take as much dirt as he needs as long as he can hug his sister in his arms.

Bathump. Bathump.

Instinctively his hand reached out to her wrist. The same wrist he held onto that night. But unlike that time, her pulse is loud and clear. Full of vitality.

Alive

“What’s taking you so long? I thought you were going to check out who was sneaking around your sister’s room?”

Ron’s voice echoed through the halls as he walked closer to where the siblings were.

“Dad’s alive? It was really Dad who blew up the first mercenary base?”

[Name] heard her brother hummed in affirmation. His chest vibrates against her cheek as they are still hugging each other.

Ron’s footsteps were silent but [name] could sense that he was close. Letting go of the hug, she stepped outside of her room to greet him.

They didn’t say anything. They don’t need to. 

For Ron will be able to recognize his daughter anywhere.

That’s why he didn’t say anything and just accepted his running daughter with open arms. Hugging her tightly, as if trying to make up for the two decades they have been apart.

“Dad I was so lonely. I was so scared.”

She confided in her dad. The veteran mercenary who’s the best in stealth and wields double daggers is gone. In the arms of her dad, she’s simply [Name] Molan. She’s just the daughter he loves. 

The daughter he thought he lost.

“It’s fine now. Everything is fine. You can tell your dad everything that happened.”

Ron stroked his daughter’s hair. His hands shaking ever so slightly.

Tears gathered in his eyes but only Beacrox noticed them. 

The chef said nothing about his father’s vulnerability. He stayed silent even when a lone tear managed to escape his father’s eyes.

His strong father. The same one who bulldozed through everything just to keep him alive. The same father who worked hard to train him while discreetly investigating the organization that attacked them. His father showed no weakness.

That same father of his has been overcome by emotion.

And Beacrox can’t say anything about it for he was the same.

[bluntloyalist]

didn't want to come across as passive aggressive putting this in the reblogs so here's a separate post about my thinky thoughts on she/her tsubaki. mainly because i do what i want forever but if canon happens to make a convincing argument for it thats nice too since i am incapable of shutting the hell up

1. KIRYU EXISTS

people love tsubaki's whole thing of accepting herself for who she is regardless of what others think. this is something i've seen repeated a lot in comments re: the official translation's he/him pronouns, and when fighting through the generally hypermasculine trenches of shounen anime/manga it's understandable want more male characters who stay true to themselves by rejecting social norms and openly embracing their femininity...however i fear we are forgetting our history 😔 the femboy diversity hire has been here all along yall our quota is full !! really tho kiryu was MADE for the girls and the gays even without getting into his personality just look at him. the pink hair. the piercings. the accessories. the off the shoulder drip. like come on COME ONNNN give him his genderqueer props

2. THE RAWS

i don't know japanese so i can't actually get too deep into how she speaks and is referred to BUT what little i can say is this. she used to use the personal pronoun ボク (boku) [katakana] as a child, and this is a common way for young boys to address themselves, but at some point she switches to ワタシ / あたし / 私 (atashi) [katakana/hiragana/kanji] in order to present and be percieved as female/feminine. this is a form of gender expression unavailable in english due to our limited number of first person pronouns and it's extremely important to her character due to how deliberate and intentional of a decision it is (though for the sake of interpretive fairness i feel like i have to say i'm not culturally knowledgeable enough to discern if it's used in a 女性語 vs オネえ言葉 context or how/if her speech patterns fit into those categories). shizuka also specifically thinks of her as an older sister 姉 (ane) [kanji]

3. DEPTH OF INTERNAL CONFLICT

tsubaki's childhood feelings of alienation, displacement, and deception are way too extreme to come from someone who only wears women's clothes because he likes the fashion (imo). this doesn't read as a young boy who's into girly hobbies and is scared people will make fun of him for it; this reads as a young trans girl who is tormented by the act of constantly lying about who she is, but who knows that living truthfully will get her utterly rejected by the majority of the people she knows. she just doesn't have the language to explain herself beyond liking pretty things and not being like "other" boys. tumblr won't let me add another photo but the shot of her looking at her reflection in the window and calling herself a liar at the beginning of the chapter...there is something so incredibly and incommunicably transgender about those few panels

IN CONCLUSION: i don't necessarily hate the official he/him decision because it will be very very cool if nii satoru actually is playing 4d gender chess with tsubaki like that but i simply do not know or trust the editorial team enough to take their word on her english pronouns (<- is hypervigilant about microaggressions against trans women)

[tfyoulookingatgiuxs]

Gameboy

Billy Hargrove x NonBinary!Reader

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: You didn't think the day could get any worse than this, but apparently you were wrong. tired from work, you came home and had to endure the shouting of your boyfriend and his little sister Maxine. Billy was going too far and you had enough.

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: +18 MDNI!! angst, blurb, very bad language, argue, broke-up, sigarettes, threats, intimidation, use of Y/N, no prounons NonBinary!Reader, theme about sex, theme about violence, anger issue, daddy issue, toxic relationship, bad ending. (Please be careful what you are about to read, the themes here are quite heavy and with a bad ending. If you don't feel like it, don't read, thanks)

𝐀/𝐍: My first Billy Hargrove One-Shot. I have to say that he's a character i dont have much interest to be honest, but if you want me to do more one-shots about Billy let me know! Please support new writers and reblog! Im sorry for my english, this is not my native language. Hope you enjoy! (DIVIDER NOT MINE)

Fuck, fuck and fuck! You thought in your head when you wanted to scream. You had just left the bar where you worked and you could tell you had had a rough day. Your boss didn't stop tormenting you, by now you seriously thought he was mad at you. But that doesn't mean you stopped trying, moving forward and taking criticism and then improving yourself, but despite this the people around you seem bad every day.

You didn't have to think about it. Absolutely not! Now you would have gone to your boyfriend's house and he will surely console you, tell you that everything will be fine–wait...no. Absolutely not. You haven't done these things for almost two months because of your full-time job and the constant evenings where Billy went out, obviously not caring that you needed him. You tried to talk to him a couple of times to find out if something was wrong but he only answered "I'm fine, we're fine, why are you asking me?" You seriously started to think if you were the crazy one or if tiredness was playing a bad joke on you. Billy seemed calm and sees nothing wrong with your relationship. You didn't say anything. You knew the issues Billy was going through with his father lately, so you let it go and once again agreed with him, and blamed it on the stress.

You got to his door before you even knocked and Billy opened it angrily, which scared you. As soon as he noticed you he took a breath and gave you a simple "Hi" before letting you inside. It often happened that you went to sleep at your boyfriend's house, especially when his father wasn't there. As soon as you entered you felt a certain tension in the air and saw Billy take his jacket from the coat rack. You were about to ask something but the boy with golden curls beat you to it "Leave Max alone, that little bitch won't come out of her fucking room until I say so" With that I left the house slamming the door.

Right from him. He doesn't even tell you where he's going or with whom.

Apparently he had argued with Maxine, his younger sister. You completely ignored what Billy said to you and went to Max's door. You could clearly hear that she was crying and that hurts you. Since you met Max she has always seen you as a second parent: kind, helpful, affectionate and above all loving. You were happy to have this relationship with her and when she happened to argue with her brother, you couldn't help but go and console her or try to resolve the situation. Before knocking you looked around, the house was a real mess, or rather a disaster, all of Billy's things scattered everywhere, starting with: weights, ashtrays, porn magazines and gameboys. Shit...

You still don't understand how you managed to fall in love with an imbecile like him. So handsome with those curls and shining face but also so arrogant, messy and not very polite. You gently knocked on the door “Max, it's me Y/N, can I come in?” You heard the little girl sniff and she agreed. You opened the door and found Maxine in tears and her face completely red from the outburst. Her pillow was wet while her cleres were a shade of red from crying. She was lying on the bed and as soon as she saw you, her breath seemed to come back. You sat next to her while you used your fingers to fix some strands of her red hair.

"Maxine...what happened?" You said almost whispering. It took her a while to answer you but in the end she did "Dad...a little while ago he was here and he was arguing with Billy," she began "I didn't know what they were arguing about but then he started hitting him.. ." Her tone was shaky as she tried to collect herself "Did Dad hit Billy?" You asked and she nodded “Yes, the asshole” okay, you got the point. “I stopped him but after mom and the asshole left, Billy started yelling at me” you raised an eyebrow “Why on earth?” The question of when might be obvious seemed difficult for Max to answer. “I don't know for sure, he just told me that I shouldn't meddle in his business” you hugged her and she immediately hugged you back.

“I'll talk to him, I promise” You said and Max looked up immediately. "No Y/N, don't do it. He's too angry and I don't want him to be angry at you too" you smiled at his sweet thought towards you. Max was now like a little sister or a daughter to protect for you, you wouldn't have let Maxine spend the evening locked in her room even though she hadn't done anything "Don't worry about me, I can handle your brother" Oh well, knowing how to handle Billy Hargrove was a big word, but that didn't stop you from consoling Max and preparing her some snacks to stop her crying.

You laughed and joked and Max had finally regained her smile and as if you were a good parent you put a blanket over her while you turned off the light, leaving Max to sleep peacefully. After at least fifteen minutes, Billy came home with a bottle of beer in his hand, you snorted at the sight. You had been waiting for him all evening and you would have at least hoped that for once he wouldn't come back drunk although he seemed quite sober.

"Where have you been?" You asked as you crossed your arms over your chest. He looked at you with a face that got on your nerves, he was bored.

"I asked you, where have you been" You repeated and he made a small moan and then replied "Outside for some fresh air" You didn't want to ask why he was drunk, you had gotten used to it by now so you let it go. Meanwhile he had thrown his jacket on the sofa.

"Why did you and Maxine argue?" Billy turned to look at you. He sat comfortably on the living room sofa bare-chested while he was ready to light his cigarette which he held between his lips. "Where's Max?" He asked "In her room to sleep after you made her cry" his face didn't change a bit, he was serious and definitely bored "Y/N, I specifically told you to leave Max alone, she was supposed to stay in her room " you nodded "In fact, she stayed in the room, but I kept her company" He let out a laugh and then looked back at your figure "You shouldn't have interacted with her" you shook your head "I'm sorry Billy, but I don't stay at your rules" at that statement he took the cigarette out of his mouth "I just want to know why you picked on her, you know I don't like seeing you or your sister like this"

"It's none of your business. What happens here is none of your business Y/N" you were shocked "Excuse me? You're my boyfriend, what happens to you is a fact that until proven otherwise concerns me too" You took a few steps closer towards the sofa. Billy giggled again and you were sure that the next one he would make would drive you mad "And let's hear, why on earth?" You gave an obvious look "Um, hello? We're engaged Billy, engaged!" You timed the last word well "Oh right, I forgot" he said it in a sarcastic way and now your nerves were getting frayed "Oh, I'm sorry this is weighing on you Billy" you too played the sarcasm card and he rolled his eyes "What the fuck Y/N! Now I have to tell you everything I do?" You nodded quickly "Yes, you piss me off that I have to tell you where I'm going, with who and why otherwise you'll ban me from going out" You almost screamed but then lowered your voice remembering Max in the other room.

Billy had lit his cigarette in the meantime "But that has nothing to do with it -" you stopped him while your blood was boiling "It certainly has something to do with it William!" Your eyes were different, they were like Billy had never seen them and when you used his real name he understood that you were seriously pissed. Billy hates being called by his real name and you knew it very well, you did it on purpose. You wanted him to understand how serious you were and how tired you were of the current situation.

“How dare you call me?” Even though he was drunk, Billy was high and his eyes were fixed on you as they gave you a horrible feeling. They wanted to intimidate you, but you weren't like that and he knew it from the first moment he met you. Even if you were afraid that he would knock your teeth out and then make you spill all your blood until you apologized, but you were brave and you wouldn't let yourself be bossed around.

You pointed your finger at him "Oh no! Don't try to make that angry dick face because I'm the angry one, you understand?" He was surprised by your arrogant response "Things have been going on like this for two months and I can't stand it anymore. You barely look at me, all you do is go out in the evening and you don't even tell me where you're going, but you do it when you're too drunk to drive and I have to pick you up" You started and he looked like he was listening intently "And this happens every Friday night Billy. I come home from work tired and destroyed by those filthy pieces of shit and instead being close to me all you do is complain" He snorted and now gave you a different look. He put the cigarette in the ashtray, even though he hadn't smoked it at all. He seemed calm and approached you smiling lovingly... was it the alcohol by any chance? Or maybe bipolar?

"Okay honey, you're right. I'm sorry, now how about we go relax over there–" you pushed him. You were disappointed. His response disgusted you more than expected "No Billy. You won't play your fucking game on me telling me I'm right when in reality you just want to take me to bed and fuck me the way you like it" his face was back and angry more than first "But apparently the other times you didn't hesitate to open your legs for me" it was cheeky and disgusting and you slapped him. You had become a burning fire and you were sure that you would burn him and his house down "Because I was blinded by a filthy imbecile asshole like you. I thought you loved me..." You felt the burning in your eyes as your eyes became shiny. You were too weak to face the truth but you needed it...as much as you loved that boy with all your heart, he would never love you "Oh so now it's me not loving you?" He said dramatically and the tears came out and this time you screamed "Billy, you never console me and only seek me out when you feel like having sex with me. What did you take me for? A toy? I'm your fucking gameboy by any chance?" He tried to answer but couldn't find the right words and blurted out "Shut your mouth" your nervous system was out of control and you raised your voice again "Not this time Billy! Not after I've opened and closed it as you please!"

Now you didn't care who could hear you or who you would disturb. You were tired. You didn't want this. You wanted a serious relationship with a serious person. You wanted someone who values ​​you and takes care of you when you need it, always available and who doesn't see you as a sex toy giving you false illusions. "Calm down, young lady! Show respect" you looked at him and in front of you you had another person. Not Billy Hargrove, but William Hargrove...the real him. Despite everything he was that and you were sorry for ruining yourself by being around him. You didn't think he would ever threaten you, an attitude you hated and hoped your boyfriend wouldn't attribute to "Wow...now you're threatening me?" Billy later realized what he said and didn't reply "Congratulations Billy Hargorve. You ruined my life. You made fun of me and took advantage of me and used me to please your cock when it got hard and needy. But worse…you became your father” you never thought you would say it, but you did. With that sentence you knew you would unleash his anger and you didn't give him time to react "It's over." You announced and then headed towards the door and exited the house as he yelled after you in anger. You didn't want to hear it or deal with it ever again. You had endured enough and it was time to end it.

You had ended a year-long relationship and you now ask yourself in tears as you walked quickly to your house as you had done. You didn't know that obviously. You will never understand, you loved him, what did you need to know or realize? As beautiful and magical as love could be, it was also blind and cruel. It seemed to be a difficult game where the only possibility of victory was to survive until the game itself got tired of testing you, and then it throws a truth in your face that you would rather ignore. But ultimately it was better to suffer for the truth than to live in something that didn't exist.

Now you needed to get up and continue to live your life but you weren't motivated to move forward and live like you did before working, especially now that the only person you loved was just a liar who loved playing with people's feelings and what's more he preferred masturbating to porn magazines than spending sweet moments with you. Would you have suffered? Yes. And you don't know for how long, but you hoped for little since you couldn't cry and dry up your tears for someone who never deserved you and who the only thing he ever worshiped was your body.

[wonderland-smile-stories]

~ Chapter 10. 03 ~

I apologize in advance for any spelling or grammar mistakes and how poorly written this fanfic is. English is not my first language and together with my dyslexia ass things can go wrong I'm sorry.

I sat against the wall next to the closet door. I wasn't in the mood to be locked in there, but I needed some peace after what just had happened.

Because of the pain I took from the green blob monster, I felt so much better than before. The headache was gone completely now, which made me happy.

I was twirling the bloody bandage from my head in my hands while thinking about everything.

Why would Hyun-su react like this?

What was that guy playing at?

Something must have happened up there.

"Hey." I snapped out of my thoughts when Hyun-su spoke up.

I was actually surprised to see him here, let alone without that guy.

"Hey," I breathe out.

"Where is your new friend?" I asked with an eyebrow raised.

Hyun-su looked behind him before looking down at me.

"Somewhere."

I nodded my head slowly before looking back down at my hands.

For a few seconds, he just stood there looking down at me before speaking up again.

"I wanted to talk to you." My eyes went back to him nodding my head for him to continue.

"They probably have told you that he is just like us, right?"

"They also have told me that he killed his own men."

I watched as Hyun-su clenched his jaw before talking again. Now in a much colder tone.

"He saved me up there."

I narrowed my eyes looking at him waiting for him to continue.

"He told me that monsters and humans can't coexist together and after what had happened earlier with that green slime monster I agreed with him."

A frown came to my face before I shook my head.

"They were scared. You can't blame them for being scared?"

"What if they become scared of you and me in the future? Are you going to let them kill you or me?!" He snapped at me.

I was kind of surprised by him raising his voice.

"They wouldn't and you know that. Just put yourself in their shoes. What would you do if you were completely human in this situation, huh? Wouldn't you be scared too? Scared people do stupid stuff."

Hyun-su let out a groan shaking his head seeing that I wasn't agreeing with him.

For a few seconds, he stood there thinking before kneeling down in front of me.

"Ui-myeong he wants to leave this place to find more like us."

Good for him let him go.

He won't bother us then.

"He asked me if I wanted to come with him. Come with us, with me, away from here."

What?

Away from Green Homes?

I can't just leave here. Ji-su, Eun-yu, Mister Han, Eun-hyuk, and the kids are here? I don't want to leave any of them behind like that.

"Who's going to protect these people if we are gone?"

Hyun-su shook his head.

"They don't need us. We have been their hounds long enough. Let them do their own dirty work."

I opened my mouth to say something but closed it quickly.

I can't understand why Hyun-su turned against the people here. I know they have hurt him in the past, but they all accepted him now.

Not all the people here wanted to use him.

"Hyun-su." I started looking at how he was hopefully waiting for my answer.

"I can't. I can't just leave them like that. They are my friends. For the first time in my life, I have found some people who like me and treat me like I'm a human being."

"But you aren't human neither am I."

I don't know why he wants to leave here.

"Don't you want to be with me?"

I was surprised by those words and what they could mean.

Do I want to leave everyone that I care about and who cares about me to be with Hyun-su?

Do I want to leave my makeshift family I have created here?

I don't want him to leave at all. If I could I would go with him, but there are too many people here who I care about that I don't just want to leave behind like this.

To be honest I don't think Hyun-su wants to leave either.

I think he's just scared.

I know that he cares for the people here as much as I do. It's just that guy Ui-myeong who has planted doubts in his mind.

"No," I whisper with a shaky breath.

"No, if it means that I have to leave the people who care about me behind."

He was taken back for a second, but his shocked expression soon changed to his old emotionless gaze.

Without saying anything he stood up. This was not what I wanted.

"Hyun-su, wait." I stood up grabbing his arm, but he pulled back.

"Don't." He replied coldly.

"Hyun-su please, just listen. I don't know what that guy has told you, but it isn't true!"

He turns around to face me.

"He has shown me the truth about humans." I shook my head.

"No, not everyone is bad! Just like there aren't all bad monsters! Why are you believing this guy over the people here?" I tried to explain to him, but it didn't seem to work.

"The people who used and locked me up here like some animal?!" He yelled at me.

I clenched my jaw taking a deep breath.

"Please, Hyu..."

"Why did I expect you to listen to me? You're just as bad as them. If you had really cared about me you would have told me and everyone else the truth about you being a monster as well, but I guess you were too scared to be used and locked up just as was. You're just like everyone else."

I was too shocked to speak.

How could he say that? He knows that I wanted to! I didn't have a choice.

For a few seconds, he just looked at my heartbroken stare before he turned and walked away. 

The moment he turned the corner tears began to spill on my cheek.

Why was he like this?!

How could he be so cruel?

He knows that I tried every time to help him!

"It's odd that you choose humans over monsters."

My head shot up when I heard an unfamiliar voice.

"It's odd you would think I would choose someone like you over people I care about." I snapped back.

He let out a chuckle before he began to walk towards me.

"So you don't care about Hyun-su? The poor boy looked devastated when he passed me a couple of seconds ago."

My eyes followed his every move not trusting him one bit.

"I do care about him, more than you think, but I won't let someone fill my head with lies."

He let out a loud laugh circling me.

"I didn't tell him one lie. I just opened his eyes so that he would see the real world, why can't you see it? Don't you see that these people are just using you two? They would be dead in seconds if you weren't here."

I let out a scoff shaking my head.

"Trust me I know what the real world is. These people are my family and you don't know one fucking thing about them or me!"

He stopped walking when he was back in front of me. My eyes followed his hand when he grabbed something from his pocket before handing me a red paper.

"Are you sure they see you as their family? Aren't you a little afraid they will sacrifice you the minute they learn they don't need you anymore?"

With frown brows, I look down at the piece of paper before opening it.

My eyes caned the page reading everything carefully. It was a military announcement. They will offer safety and shelter if you offer them a special infectie. Someone like me.

"So are you still so sure about these people?" I look back up at him seeing him smirk at me.

With a clenched jaw, I crumble the piece of paper before pushing it back into his hands.

"Yes, now why don't you just leave? You don't want to be here and we don't want you here. Be smart and go before I'll make you."

Ui-myeong raised his brows with an amused smile on his face.

"Why? Are you scared I'll hurt your so-called friends?" My hands turned into fists seeing how cocky he was.

"You better don't touch anyone here. I'll make sure you regret the moment you step foot in this building. Now be wise and go. Don't take my threat as a bluff." The smile never left his face.

It only grew.

With his hands up like he would surrender himself he took a few steps back.

"Okay, I get it." He was about to turn around when he spoke up a final time.

"Black looks good on you, to be honest." With that, he walked away leaving me behind in anger.

Previous Chapter ~ Next Chapter

———————————————————-

Hey guys! Theirs only 1 chapter left and an epilogue. The next chapter is going to be long! I first wanted to split it in two, but I didn’t really like it, so it’s going to be one long one. I hope you guys enjoy it, bye!

[knific]

hi im john! or zero. i'm a LEESBO and i draw stuff : also im multifandom and i switch interests almost monthly. if you follow me for one thing you might not get that.

i'm fifteen and from the southeast of asia. i can speak different languages but i only prefer being spoken to in english lol!

also we MIGHT be mutuals. this isn't my main blog and that was actually a mistake because i didn't know how to use tumblr by the time. if you see you're being followed by some user called epicflowpow then I guess we're mutuals :') that's my main blog that im inactive on! lol! it's hard to explain

byf:

i have bad memory don't expect me to remember anything personal like ur birthday,

i make sex jokes sometimes ok if ur not comfortable lmk and ill stop,

i post what i want, i might post blood, gore, etc. anything i post may be triggering, if you don't like it block me! the only form of censoring you'll get is the tags so get ready to mute a few (ex: cw blood, cw knife, cw suicide)

my social skills suck.. you can try to talk to me but i get very nervous when talking privately and i might say things i don't mean

i am sometimes rude but it's just for fun lol i don't actually mean it,

i don't reaalyyy use tonetags but ill use them when my wording starts to sound a little serious

uhhh i make homophobic jokes because it's FUNNY. im actually a person of the bacon community though so yeah.

i like to cuss my faves out. i will say very very mean stuff about them and I won't state whether it's positive or negative. if you don't like that then you should probably not read the tags sometimes

i ironically use emojis like 😂🥺🥹😜 etc

-

dni: i don't have a dni because people are gonna interacr with me anyways. ill block whoever makes me feel uncomfortable and who not (pr/shipp*rs are not exceptions lol ALL will be blocked)

-

also i do requests! here are like. rules for my requests n stuff:

i think im most likely to do EVERY request you guys give me, so go crazy! i just won't do it quickly. because im not an art machine

i do any reqs, but i will less likely do/will put for last the oc requests lol :)

okay when I said any reqs i lied: just don't request me taco x pickle loll it's for the sake of some of my mutuals :) i can still draw them hanging out but it won't be tagged as ship or implied ship

i also do any fandom but again i will less likely do fandoms im not in lol

uhh. if im uncomfortable with a ship in particular ill just ignore your req don't bother sending it again or im gonna give you a beating

complicated styled characters are ok but if you wanna give me a first good impression don't send them or you're literally breaking my fingers physically

also comics scare me if you request those too you're also breaking my fingers (it's not prohibited though you can send them but ill cry)

-

tags

0 art: for my art

0 ask: for asks

0 req: art requests!

0 s req: things people draw for me :)

0 reblogs: for reblogs (best muted)

0 txt: me talking

0 talk: me talking w other ppl

0 fave: favourites/saving for later

0 other: other

[lord-sharl-perceval]

Champagne Problems

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader Summary: In which they maintain the ruse to get back at someone of her past. Warnings: fluff, angst, fake dating, overly romanticized for entertainment purposes, made up girlfriend of Carlos & Pierre, google translated french. Notes: sorry, for not uploading any time sooner, but I was busy with uni! Also english is not my first language, so criticism is always welcome, but please be kind xx NOT proof read yet! Word count: 7.2K

Masterlist

Part One: The Sweet Stranger

Part Two: The Deal

Part Three: Karma Is My Boyfriend

»your mom's ring in your pocket, her picture in your wallet, you won't remember all my champagne problems«

"Charles" you breathed.

"That is not true. You said it yourself, love is a choice and sometimes people stop choosing" you spoke under your breath, still holding his warm hand.

"Are you bluffing to cheer me up, y/n?" He spoke, the corner of his mouth quirking up.

"No, I'm not"

Charles narrowed his brows, doubting the truthfulness of your words.

"Only the bravest dare to love" you continued, locking eyes with him.

"Because love is painful, we just have to find the one worth the pain"

"And what about the people incapable of love?" He whispered back, his voice sounding raspy and deep. Bringing up the sort of people you used to categorize yourself as.

"They aren't incapable of love, they're just scared of getting hurt" you admitted.

"Scared of losing themselves in love" the words left your lips feathery.

Tension gradually built up between you two. There was something intimate, almost poetic in laying close to one another under the clear night sky having the same conversation a year later, only with altered notions.

"I see you have reflected on my words" Charles murmured, his eyes looking down on your lips. Your heart started to hysterically pound in your rib cage, hearing the blood flushing in your ear.

"Yeah" you replied scarcely audible.

Just as Charles wanted to lean forward to put his beautifully defined lips on yours, you backed away.

"You're hurt, Charles, you don't really want that"

"Have a safe flight, text me when you land" the monegasque said with a crooked smile on his lips.

"I will" you assured, wrapping your arms around his torso, feeling his arms embrace your body and pulling you closer.

You lost track of time, the hug that could have only lasted a few seconds, felt like minutes. Your senses sharpened, taking as much in as possible within the limited time. The warmth of his body, the smell of his perfume, the way his hands gripped your waist. You both held tight onto one another, deep down not wanting the first ever hug to presumably be your last.

"Thank you" he whispered into your ear, his nose and lips brushing your cheek as he let go off you, unintentionally elevating your heartbeat.

"Anytime" you faintly smiled, waving him goodbye one last time, before you turned around and strode to the passport control.

Charles stood still, watching you pass your passport to the officer, secretly hoping you would turn around one last time, but he knew better.

You weren't one to look back.

Just as the last spark of hope was about to go out, you turned around meeting the brunette's eyes, flashing him a soft smile before you eventually disappeared out of his sight.

As soon as you reached the particular waiting area, you sat down awaiting permission to board the plane. In the meantime you caught yourself reminiscing about what you had experienced the previous day. The fun you had cruising through some of the french cities close to Monaco, Charles' showing you the beauty of the Côte d'Azur and reminding you of what it felt like to be unconditionally happy.

The south of france was marvellous, the perfect getaway for a busy woman trying to escape reality even if it was just for one day.

"What was the hardest case you ever had to handle?" Charles enquired interestedly, while you were strolling on the promenade in Nice.

"Child molesters cases are always the hardest, that's why I stopped taking them. But there was this one guy, wasn't a hard case per se, but it was tricky nonetheless, 'cause he suffered from Bipolar Disorder and wanted to build a library in his home, that made him buy ten thousand pound worth of books he couldn't afford"

"Oh damn" he replied astonished.

"And you had to asses his criminal liability?"

"Exactly, he was found not criminally responsible due to his manic episode in which he didn't have any control over his actions whatsoever" you explained.

"That's rough"

You nodded.

"Yeah, indeed"

"Do you do that in everyday life? Analyzing people?"

"Only people that interest me" you grinned playfully and carefully watched Charles' expression that showed fear of exposure.

"Relax!" You said, punching his shoulder.

"To properly analyze, I'd have to ask the right questions"

While daydreaming you became aware of an odd feeling of emptiness laced with gloom creeping up on you, resulting in a small, eternal panic attack.

You knew that feeling and it couldn't be good.

Repeatedly you told yourself that it meant nothing, you did him a favor and Charles nicely returned it by taking you on a short road trip.

It meant absolutely nothing.

You and Charles came from two different worlds. He was a public figure, who raced for a living and you were an ordinary woman with a normal job. To restore order you ultimately had to return to your own worlds.

Luckily, the lady working for the airline you were traveling with interrupted your train of thoughts by announcing that the passengers may now board the aeroplane.

You got in line and waited your turn, putting in your AirPods to kill time, whilst scrolling through your Instagram until you were next in line and showed the employee your passport. After she waved you through, you exited the waiting area and wandered towards the plane.

At the entrance you were politely greeted by the boardcrew, whom you greeted back and walked down the aisle until you found your seat. After you stored your bag into the overhead lockers, you sat down on the assigned passenger seat and put your seatbelt on. While you still could, you texted everyone back, informing your youngest brother that you had just boarded the plane, so he could plan when to pick you up from the airport.

Absorbed in thoughts your mind replayed the memory of the night Charles tried to kiss you. Closely after you had told him that he was acting upon his hurt feelings you alertly watched his expression, fearing to have upset the monegasque, because he kept a straight face not revealing his feelings.

At first you thought, you had ruined it, but thankfully Charles mumbled a "I'm sorry" shortly after and shot you an exhausted smile.

You then snuggled up to him, his hand still entwined with yours, laying your head in the crook of his neck.

Your upper body was partly laying on his, your clasped hands resting on his belly. Both of you enjoyed the moment, sensing your heart rates synchronizing, beating in the same rhythm.

Charles was the first man to be this close to you after you broke off things with your ex-boyfriend, no other man was able to arouse the need of closeness inside of you before. Instead of experiencing anxiety, whenever a man tried to come close to you, his nearness felt soothing and so naturally as though you were always meant to lay next to each other that night.

The next morning Charles revisited the topic of the night before, excusing his behavior and thanking you repeatedly for stopping him. You shrugged it off, telling him not to worry about it and since then you two hadn't mentioned it again. Both knowing it was for the best.

Cruel Summer by Taylor Swift came on and you couldn't help but associate the past few days with that song, leading you to look outside of the narrow window of the plane and paying attention to every lyric.

"It's blue, the feeling I've got and it's ooh, whoa, oh. It's a cruel summer"

A deep sigh escaped your lips. You hadn't expected to be effected by the weekend this much. Now you were feeling blue, mourning the relationship you had had, missing the feeling of oxytocin releasing whenever a certain someone held you. You went from being a content single woman to one longing for a relationship again.

It was indeed a cruel summer.

You spent the rest of the two hour flight listening to more Taylor Swift and moping around.

Everything went according to plan, your brother picked you up from Heathrow and drove you home, asking how your short trip to Monaco was to which you responded that it was good and exactly what you needed, when in reality it was the quite opposite. If you had known, that going to Monte Carlo with Charles messed with your emotional life, you wouldn't have agreed to go in the first place.

Once you reached your apartment you texted Charles that you had arrived safe and sound as he requested, not anticipating that you initiated a conversation leading to another. Before you knew it you were texting back and forth, even talking on the phone in course of months, developing a real friendship. It even had got to the point where you started actively watching Formula One to support your friend, texting or calling him no matter the outcome.

"You're glowing, are you seeing someone?"

"What are you smiling at? Has your secret lover texted you?"

"You look happier these days"

You were hearing comments like these all the time and while there was a wisp of truth in their statements, you were not ready to admit it to yourself yet. Charles wasn't your lover, you pretended to be a couple once and now you were good friends. And friends could make each other happy and pay one another a surprise visit, couldnt they?

Of course you had contacted Arthur Leclerc beforehand, ensuring that you wouldn't inconvenience Charles with your presence at the Italian Grand Prix, whereupon Arthur suggested you surprise him after the race to not distract your boyfriend from his duty.

You felt bad for keeping up this farce, Arthur seemed to be a very nice guy, surely not deserving to be part of your self-serving plan. But you knew better than to meddle in family business, instead you played along and gratefully accepted Arthur's help. However the purpose of this trip to Monza wasn't only to bring Charles joy, it was because you needed to get out of London after learning unpleasant news. News you preferred to discuss with Charles in person. Conventionally there were no races taking place after Monza for two weeks, giving you the perfect excuse to finally visit Italy, a country you had always wanted to see.

Naturally your family started to ask questions and demanded to meet the mysterious man you're seeing, putting you under a lot of pressure, which led to you repeatedly telling them that you were just friends. But given the circumstances, they didn't believe you.

Charles' busy schedule thankfully worked in your favor, hence you always had a good reason ready, whenever one of your family members opened up the conversation about your friend and why they couldn't invite him for dinner.

"You okay? You seem a little off" Charles asked with a frown on his forehead.

You grabbed your phone with him on the screen and crawled into bed.

"I'm having a rough case at work" you lied, whithholding the true reason behind your absent-mindedness.

"Sorry" you apologized, tucking yourself up.

"Wanna talk about it?" He sweetly asked, but you shook your head in response.

"Maybe some other time, thanks" you shot him a tired smile.

"Does the Ferrari home race put extra pressure on you?"

Charles pulled up the hood of his black Hoodie and nodded.

"Yeah, it does" he replied, a deep sigh following shortly after.

"But qualitying went well, so I'm pretty confident"

"Pole position is a good opportunity to win a race"

"I like the fact that you started watching Formula One because of me" he grinned.

"Yeah, I like seeing that cute dutch guy kick your ass" you countered, teasing him with his biggest rival Max Verstappen.

"Verstappen is not cute" Charles spat, rolling his eyes in annoyance.

"He's cute when he smiles on that podium" you replied sassy, enjoying pissing off Charles.

"Ouch" he pouted, crossing his arms.

There was just something about the way he sat on the bed, looking cuddly in his oversized hoodie. A soft smile appearing on his lips, his tired eyes dreamily gazing at the camera. It gave you a fuzzy feeling.

Tomorrow I'll see you again you thought.

Subconsciously you were replaying the moment of how Charles wrapped his arms around your body and gave you that right and safe feeling, like you had always belonged into his arms.

Tomorrow.

By this time you were both laying on your sides, barely being able to keep your eyes open, talking about all kind of different things like most nights until you both fell asleep.

The next morning you took a taxi to Heathrow, went through security and waited the last half an hour until you could board the plane. Though the flight only took two hours, you managed to catch up on some sleep before you landed in Milan and were picked up by the youngest Leclerc.

"Hey y/n!" Arthur pulled you into a warm hug as soon as you were in reach and relieved you of your suitcase after you let go of one another.

"Hope you had a pleasant flight"

"Yeah, it was fine, thank you" you smiled.

"You look tired, lucky for you we still have an hour drive ahead of us to Monza" he shot you a playful glance.

"Maybe catch up on some sleep to get rid of the shadows under your eyes" Arthur added, teasing you.

"You're horrible!" you laughed, loving how familiar you already were around each other.

"I'm just kidding, I swear" he said, raising his hands.

In the car you had no troubles finding topics to talk about, Charles' little brother was as bubbly and easy going as him. You felt comfortable around him up until Arthur revealed that he unravelled your webs of lies.

"Look, I know you're not really dating my brother"

Shocked you turned your head into his direction, trying to say something but only splutter came out of your mouth.

"Charles didn't tell me of course, but I know my brother. Lorenzo and I know our brother" he briefly looked over to you.

"We knew something was off, especially because there is no way he could've genuinely fallen in love or start something casual with someone he met during a get together. Not with this crazy schedule and top of that not without telling anyone" Arthur proceeded.

"Plus the break-up with Violette messed him up pretty badly. That's why Lorenzo was so rude to you, he thought you were taking advantage of Charles' vulnerability"

"No, I promise" you immediately said.

"Charles and I are friends. He did me a favor once, so I returned it by accompanying him to that jewellery event" you continued, breathing a sigh.

"But how did you discover the truth?"

"At first I thought the same as Lorenzo, 'cause I couldn't think of something plausible, but then I overheard Charles FaceTiming you. I know, eavesdropping is disrespectful" he flashed you an apologetic look.

"But I heard you saying that you don't feel comfortable accepting our mother's invitation to dinner, 'cause you don't wanna lie to her about being his girlfriend and then it all made sense up there" the monegasque pointed to his blonde head.

"In addition to that you just confirmed my assumption" Arthur grinned, looking over to you.

"But I'm dying to know how it all started"

So you enlightened him, telling Arthur all about how Charles and you met on the Tower Bridge a year and couple months ago right up to how he had randomly called you two months ago to ask for the favor and that you had been texting and FaceTiming ever since then, having unintentionally formed a close friendship.

"Not gonna lie the concept of trusting a stranger more than your close ones has a ring to it" Arthur laughed, but you could tell he was slightly hurt.

"It's not about trusting more, it's about embarrassment. I, for instance, was too embarrassed to tell my friends and family that I didn't wanna get married without having an 'apparent' reason. Talking to Charles, a total stranger at that time, really helped, 'cause I didn't have to live up to any expectations, you know?"

You looked over to Arthur, who just nodded.

"When Charles called me up and asked me to be his company, he was embarrassed as well. It wasn't that he trusted me more, but I was a stranger, he couldn't care less what I'd think of him. But with family and friends it's different" you clarified the whole situation.

"I understand" he flashed you a faint smile.

"I'm glad, he has found someone like you"

"I'm glad, I found someone like him too"

When you arrived, you were late intentionally, so Charles wouldn't see you. However Arthur's older brothers spammed him with calls, which the youngest Leclerc brother knowingly ignored.

"We gotta hurry" he said, handing you the VIP Paddock Pass to hang around your neck.

"Lorenzo is gonna murder me" he mumbled, picking up the pace. You dashed through security and sprinted to the VIP area, where Lorenzo welcomed his brother with angry french scolding and you with a disapproving look.

All the Formula One drivers were already sitting in their cars, Charles on pole position followed by the Red Bull driver Max Verstappen.

The moment the light turned green, the drivers went full throttle, causing your heart to skip a beat.

You were eagerly watching the race, unable to shift your attention elsewhere, fearing you would miss something. The only time your eyes left the huge screen was when you were asking Arthur questions to clear up your confusion about certain things.

Since you started genuinely watching Formula One, you understood what it meant to get excited about a sport. You finally discovered the beauty of it, how it brought people together and made them bond. You even got Lorenzo to explain a thing or two to you without trying to glare you to death.

Before you knew it, the race was nearly over, time flew like those cars almost flew over the grid.

The last few laps were nerve wrecking, Charles was fighting for the first place with his Ferrari teammate Carlos Sainz. Like being on tenderhooks you were alertly watching Charles trying to keep his leading position.

Eventually on the penultimate lap Charles was able to put Sainz off, with the gap between the two drivers growing bigger.

When Charles crossed the finish line, the crowd went crazy and so did you and his brothers. Arthur grabbed you by the arm and motioned you to follow him to the barriers to surprise his brother right after his win. You saw Charles climbing out of his racing car, cheering towards the crowd. He then carefully took off his helmet, revealing his beaming smile. After depositing his helmet on the car, he excitedly ran towards the barriers firstly hugging all the pit crew members, shortly after joined by his teammate that won second place. Charles and Carlos Sainz exchanged hugs as well, both proud to have won the home race for their team.

As Charles moved on, his eyes met yours. Confused he started running towards you, not fully believing his eyes until you were standing face to face.

His hair rampled, his gorgeous hazel eyes sparkling in excitement, the beautifully contoured lips slightly parted.

"What are you doing here?" He whispered overwhelmed, instantly pulling you into his embrace.

"I came here to see you. Congratulations!" you replied, putting your arms around his neck, feeling how much his heart was hammering against his rib cage.

"Sorry, I'm all sweaty" he apologized, letting go of you to lean his forehead against yours, wearing a soft smile on his lips.

"It's fine" you chuckled.

"You did it, Champ. You overtook Verstappen"

"I did" Charles exhaled full of relief.

"Sorry y/n, it's our turn now" Arthur interrupted and pulled his brother away from you, hugging him.

When everyone finished hugging and congratulating this year's winner of the italian Grand Prix, Charles briefly returned to you.

"I'll be right back, promise" the monegasque said, flashing you his typical dazzling smile before he disappeared.

Soon later the podium ceremony started, Charles standing on the highest step with Carlos Sainz on his right and Max Verstappen on his left. A combination of the monegasque and italian anthem started playing, honoring Charles' win as well as the win of Ferrari's constructor, who was standing on a seperate podium. Subsequently Charles was handed his glorious trophy followed by the representative of the constructor's team, Carlos Sainz and lastly Max Verstappen.

Charles kissed his precious trophy before he lifted it with a big fat smile on his face, celebrating his victory with the Ferrari fans. After the drivers trophies were put aside, they continued with the famous Champagne celebrations, spraying each other with the sparkling liquid.

After the procedure of the winning ceremony was done, you went to the paddock with Arthur and Lorenzo to wait for Charles.

By the time the Ferrari duo arrived, you had got to know Carlos Sainz' girlfriend Alyssa, who you ran into on your way to the Ferrari garage.

Both soaked in champagne they opened their racing suits and left the upper half hang down to give you a hug without staining your clothes with champagne.

Charles introduced you to his fellow teamate and the second you told Carlos that it was nice meeting him, the spaniard raised his eyebrows.

"Oh british" he stated, swiftly facing Charles.

"Is that London Girl?" Carlos asked his teammate with a crooked smile on his lips.

The monegasque awkwardly rubbed his neck while nodding, his cheeks turning crimson.

"Yeah, she's the girl I met in London" he stammered.

"So you guys are dating?" Carlos interestedly asked, raising one of his thick brows.

Not sure what to reply, you looked at Charles for help, who grabbed you by the waist and tugged you closer to him.

"Yeah" the brunette then said and looked at you smiling.

"Since when?"

Just as you needed to come up with another lie a blonde guy joined you, thankfully interrupting the awkward conversation about your fake relationship to congratulate Charles and Carlos with a brotherly handshake and tap on the back and went over to the other Leclcercs and Alyssa to greet them as well.

"Hi, Pierre" Alpine's driver politely introduced himself to you.

"Pierre, that's London Girl" Carlos cheekily interposed.

The fact that Charles' friends knew about you, flattered you so much, you could feel how the blood rushed into your cheeks.

"Give it a rest, mate" Charles barked, flashing him a warning glare.

"Hi, y/n" you disclosed your name to Pierre Gasly, trying to act as natural as possible, after Carlos' remark to Pierre, who examined you from head to toe.

"Finally we get to meet the girl that Charles told us so much about" the frenchman said, grinning at his monegasque friend.

"We'll need an explanation, mate" Carlos too focused his eyes on the monegasque.

"Later" Charles grunted, obviously containing himself from attacking his colleagues for exposing him like that in front you.

"I'm all sticky, gotta get a shower" Charles looked over to you and placed a soft kiss on your temple.

"I'm sorry for keeping you waiting all the time"

"No, don't worry about it" you shyly shrugged it off.

Meanwhile Charles and Carlos were washing up, you were bridging the gap with Alyssa and the Leclerc brothers. Pierre returned to his team's garage to freshen up as well and agreed to meet you for dinner to celebrate his friend's victory.

On the way to the hotel, you rode with Charles and the first thing you did was enlighten him about his baby brother seeing through your act.

"Please tell Lorenzo and your Mom" you literally begged.

"I don't want you to lie to the people closest to you"

"Wait, are you upset I told Carlos and Alyssa we were a couple?" Charles asked, shooting you a worried look.

"No, it's not that, Charles. It's that I don't wanna cause any problems between you and your family and friends. Secrets tear people apart"

"How did that little shit find out in the first place?" He wondered upset.

"He heard us FaceTiming"

"Imma beat the crap out of him for eavesdropping" Charles huffed, visibly angry with his younger brother.

"Don't. He was worried about you" you defended Arthur.

"Worried about me? why the fuck?"

"He thought I was taking advantage of you" you admitted.

"Lorenzo still thinks that"

Charles inhaled sharply, running his fingers through his already tousled hair.

"Fine, I'll talk to him"

"Please, Charles. Don't be mad, today is your day. You're supposed be happy and celebrating. You fucking won in Monza, for the first time you have more points than Verstappen" you grabbed his hand, that was resting on his thigh and interlocked your fingers.

"You're right" he said calmly, squeezing your hand.

Soon after you arrived at the hotel, you quickly got in to rest and unpack your stuff to get ready for dinner. Arthur didn't let you book a hotel room and demanded to take care of the reservation and booked you a room on the same floor as Charles.

You went for a strapless top with lacey sleeves and ripped skinny jeans combined with plateau heels and a matching purse. You agreed to meet the Leclerc brothers in the lobby, so when you arrived, you spotted them sitting on leather couches scrolling through their cells.

"I hope, I didn't keep you waiting for too long" you excused yourself.

All three brothers looked up to you at the same time, but only Charles' glance lingered on you, couldn't detain himself from checking you out.

"Shall we?" You asked, blushing.

"Shut your mouth, brother, there's a bus coming!" Arthur scoffed, chuckling with Lorenzo joining him.

"La ferme, Arthur" (shut up, Arthur) Charles hissed through gritted teeth and got up.

"Charles" Lorenzo warned and then turned to their youngest brother.

"Tiens-toi bien" (behave yourself)

When you arrived, the waiter of the posh restaurant seated you at the table, where Carlos, Alyssa, Pierre and his company were already awaiting you.

The food was great, the atmosphere joyful. Alyssa and Helena were great gals with whom you connected immediately.

It felt genuine and right, if it weren't for the fake relationship.

You called it a night earlier than the rest, so you resorted to the pretentious hotel.

You and Charles changed into more comfortable clothes before he knocked on your door to hang out, before you go to sleep.

The second the door of your hotel room engaged in the lock, you walked up to the monegasque, looking up into his pretty, hazel eyes.

"I came here to embarrass myself"

"What is it?" He asked a smirk spreading across his face.

You breathed out loudly, crawling into the kingsize bed and motioned Charles to join you.

"It's kinda messed up" you warned, slipping your feet underneath the blanket.

"I'm listening" Charles said, sitting down on the edge of the bed.

"Benjamin, my father's godchild is getting married next friday and Will, my Ex is going to be at the wedding" you began.

"With my former best friend as his plus one" you said in addition and watched how Charles' expression changed to dismay.

"That's fucking messed up" he panted and shook his head in disbelief.

"I know right, so I was wondering-"

"Say no more. I'll be your date at the wedding" the monegasque got ahead of you and answered your unspoken question.

"You're the best" you smiled, gazing into his dreamy eyes.

"Is that what has been on your mind the past few weeks?"

You nodded, letting yourself sink beneath the cushions.

"I haven't seen both since that night"

"Why didn't you tell me, y/n?"

"'Cause you already have enough on your plate" you reasoned.

"Arthur told me you have two weeks off, that's why I came here"

Charles laid down next to you, pulled you into his arms and brushed the hair out of your face.

"I just don't know how to face them" you groaned, burying your face into your hands.

"Wanna talk about it now?" The brunette offered, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

"I still feel so guilty, yet so betrayed and mad"

"What happened when you returned that night?" Charles inquired.

You breathed in and out before putting yourself through that horrible experience again.

"When I went back to our flat, everyone was waiting for me boiling with rage. Their faces full of fury, disappointment. Especially Will's, his eyes were blood shot and swollen, he looked so devastated and so angry, rightfully so" guilty you looked down on your hands and paused for a short period of time, collecting your thoughts.

"His parents, his sister, they basically mopped the floor with me the second I walked through the door and I let them, because I deserved it" a painful smile appeared on your lips. That night was one of the most horrible nights of your life.

"Then when everyone left Will went berserk and threw me out of our shared flat, so I had to sleep at my father's place. Will refused to see me after that"

Charles' brows furrowed and his eyes glinted with sadness at the sight of your sorrowful face.

"I screwed up, I'm well aware of that, but that didn't mean I was fine doing that, I needed someone by my side, I needed my best friend. But instead of being there for me, she took care of him"

You rested your head on his shoulders, sensing how is warmth and smell soothed you after revisiting this topic that never failed to upset you all over again.

"She was in love with him all along and waited for the perfect opportunity to snatch him and he went with it. Probably to get back at me or because he had feelings for her too"

"You don't deserve that" Charles spoke in a soft voice, rubbing your shoulders with his thumb.

"This only proves how disloyal they are and how you made a good call declining his proposal"

"Yeah" you agreed, still crushed.

"What about other friends?"

You just shook your head.

"I was too ashamed of myself to talk to anyone, besides they were more Will's friends than mine. I'm not really the group friend kinda person. That's why it hurt so badly, when Diane distanced herself from me. It ripped open old wounds. She favored him over me, it reminded me of the time when my mother left us for one of her lovers"

The brunette held you close to his chest, provided you with what you needed exactly. Just two arms wrapped around you, giving you secureness and above all company. With Charles by your side you didn't feel alone like on most days.

"I'm so sorry y/n..." Charles said under his breath, gently stroking your hair.

"I should have given you my number that night"

"No, you had Violette back then, it wouldn't have been right" you whispered back, closing your eyes and feeling your heartrate decrease.

You laid in his arms so naturally as though you had done this a hundred times already. You couldn't think of a better company than Charles'.

"What's up with London Girl anyway?" You asked after some time glancing up to him, a smile climbing up your face.

"Oh lord" Charles groaned, letting his eyelids fall shut.

"I wasn't sure, if I was supposed to tell Violette about you, so I asked Carlos and Pierre and then they started calling you London Girl" he briefly explained.

"And did you tell Violette?"

"Yeah, I did" the monegasque replied.

"How did she react?"

"She reacted pretty well, glad her boyfriend and I quote 'was such a kind soul'"

You perceived the immediate sadness that crept into his gaze, while the words left his lips and his eyes were blankly staring into the void.

Charles was still mourning after Violette.

"What's the plan for tomorrow?" You then asked to distract him from thinking of his ex-girlfriend.

After you discussed your plans for tomorrow you wandered from one topic to another until you both calmly fell asleep on your hotel bed. Your head on Charles' chest while his head leaned against yours, his arms still around you keeping you sheltered.

The next morning you awoke Charles was still peacefully sleeping looking like an angel. You couldn't help but to smile at the sight of him, carefully gazing at his face noticing his long lashes, his sharp jawline and his beautifully defined lips. You caught yourself wanting to kiss him and that made you retreat.

You couldn't kiss him, he wasn't actually your boyfriend.

Without waking him up you freed yourself out of his embrace and decided to get ready for your busy day.

Eventually Charles woke up, looking drowsy and cute with his hair tousled in all directions.

"Good morning, sleeping beauty" you teased him.

"Sorry, I fell asleep" Charles abruptly apologized, nearly sounding panicky.

"It's fine" you assured.

"Can't remember the last time I slept so tight" it slipped out of your mouth.

"Im glad to hear" the brunette replied, his voice sounding raspy.

Attractive.

You shook off that thought.

"Wanna get breakfast?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just give me a few minutes to get ready"

"No rush"

Still half asleep he dragged his feet to his room to get ready for the day, whilst you were scrolling through your socials.

A decision you regretted instantly.

The picture of you and Charles hugging and leaning your foreheads against each other were circulating on the internet.

You should have known better.

You just digged your own grave by fake dating Charles Leclerc.

Several knocks on your door caught your attention, making you jump to your feet and rush to the door.

"Have you been online?" Charles asked instantly when you opened up the the door at which you responded with a nod.

"I'm so sorry! Arthur should have known better than to bring you to the barriers"

"Don't worry about me, I'm not the one standing in the public eye after all"

"We have to talk to my publicist"

After discussing further steps regarding that matter with Charles' publicist, you grabbed something to eat and sallied out to take a look around Monza. Despite all of this drama you tried to enjoy the trip the best you could, even though running into fans that spotted you together was unavoidable.

The rest of your stay in Italy was filled with panic and anxiety as more people saw you out with Charles and more pictures of your face surfaced on the internet. Even pictures from when you were in Monaco appeared out of nowhere.

More and more people started to recognize you.

Sadly that didn't end when you both travelled to London together for the wedding Charles promised you to accompany you to. Fans kept recognizing you, asking Charles for pictures and started recording you, almost shoving the camera in your faces, to upload the footage to the internet.

All kind of people you knew started calling or texting you, to learn everything about the famous racing driver you were supposedly dating.

It was a nightmare.

You decided to take your Mini Cooper which was less flashy than Charles' signature Ferrari and allowed you to drive to the venue without being noticed.

When you arrived, you handed the valet your car keys and set foot into gigantic venue alongside Charles.

"May I take your Coat, Miss?" A girl working here politely asked.

"Let me help" Charles offered and helped you take off your long black coat. You then turned around and watched Charles freeze at the sight of your long black figure-enhancing dress that was only laced up with thin straps from behind, revealing your whole back.

"You look...gorgeous" he blurted out and gave you the confirmation and self-esteem boost you needed to survive this evening.

"You look dashing yourself" you complimented him back.

Charles Leclerc in a Ferrari suit was no doubt your favorite fit on him.

You wrapped your fingers around his upper arm and walked down the hallway to enter the actual location.

"Unlike you I told you about meeting my family here" you whispered into his ear and watched him roll his eyes.

"I told you, I was sorry"

You guided Charles to your father, his wife and your brothers and was finally able to introduce them to your mysterious friend.

Your fathers wife immediately hugged him and your father shook his hand firmly.

You had feared this situation becoming extremly uncomfortable. After all your father and you didn't really share a strong bond due to him not being exactly present, therefore introducing him to Charles was rather a formality than something you wanted to share with him.

But to your surprise he reacted excited seeing the Formlula One driver, even congratulting him on the good season so far, catching you off guard. Completely surprised you looked over to your stepmother, who lovingly smiled and whispered to you how handsome company was.

After getting to know your brothers as well you went over to the bride and groom, both hardly being able to pull themselves together meeting Charles.

In course of the evening you noticed Will and Diane arriving, greeting your family and relatives. They looked well, you couldn't deny that, but you and Charles looked better. You could perceived how they were shooting you looks, inspecting you and Charles.

You tried your best to not let them affect you, tried to seem as unbothered as possible. But nevertheless it stung in your chest when you saw the people that once meant the world to you for the first time after nearly one and a half years again.

"You okay?" The monegasque softly asked, noticing your mood shift.

"They're here" you said under your breath, subtly motioning in their direction.

His hands cupped your face, his gorgeous eyes staring into yours.

"Don't let them ruin the night, it's going well so far, isn't it?"

You laid your hand onto his warm one, your lips forming a small smile.

"You're right, thank you"

A few minutes later the DJ played "Thinking Out Loud" by Ed Sheeran and slowly couples went to the dance floor to slow dance.

"Aren't you gonna ask me to dance?"

"Y/n, may I have this dance?" Charles asked, offering you his hand, that you took and let him guide you onto the dance floor.

Overchallenged your dance partner didn't know where to place his other hand, not wanting to disrespect you by touching your naked skin without consent.

"You are my boyfriend, you're allowed to touch me" you brought his hand up to your waist, promptly feeling a tingling sensation rushing down your spine as Charles' fingers met your skin.

"Wow, you can dance" you remarked in surprise after dancing for a short while.

"I do and I don't even hate it"

"I enjoy dancing too"

You smiled at each other. His eyes mesmerizing you like an infinite galaxy, making time stand still and everyone fade down.

It was just Charles and you. All that matters was this intimate moment.

"They're starring at us" he spoke, looking inconspicuously over to them.

"You chose the right dress for this revenge move" the brunette murmured into your ear, gliding with his fingertips along your spine, causing you goosebumps. Once again you both shared intense eye contact and then something that you had been surpressing all along hit you.

You had developed feelings for Charles Leclerc. Feelings you never wanted to experience.

The song ended, you were brought back to reality. Charles' hand dropped from your back, taking one step back.

"May I have a word with you?"

Your heart skipped a beat hearing those words out of his mouth. You turned around and looked directly into your exes face.

You narrowed your eyes, not fully grasping this was happening.

"You wanna talk now?"

"Please, y/n"

"Fine" you flashed Charles an assuring look.

"It's okay" you mouthed and smiled.

You followed Will to a corner for some privacy and eagerly waited for him to start.

"What are you doing y/n? Have you sunk so deep?"

"Excuse me?" You said outraged and folded your arms.

"So you're sleeping your way to the top now?" Will shamelessly claimed.

"Would you rather I sleep with your best friend?" You hissed, feeling the anger increase.

"You see Benjamin and Victoria? This could have been us" he said, adding salt to the wound.

"Are you hearing yourself?" You looked at him in disbelief.

"Aren't you sick of playing the part of the victim?"

"I gave you everything and you still dared to humiliate me" Will argued furiously.

"Yes, I've hurt you badly, Will. That haunted me for a long time, but my intention was to do right by you. As your wife I couldn't give you what you deserved, at least that's what I thought back when I used to think high of you" you began feeling pressure on your chest and tears welling up.

"I feel glad now, glad that I left you standing, 'cause it uncovered your and Diane's true self" you took a deep breath.

"You guys deserve one another" you spat over your shoulder before running out of the venue.

Outside you started weeping, covering your face with your hands. You hated how the right path was always the more difficult one and never the easy one.

"Hey, what happened?"

You felt the warmth of a coat wrapping around you and one arm clasping your waist.

"What did the bastard say to you?" Charles questioned, trying to get you to look at him.

However you didn't answer his question, you just threw your arms around his neck and sobbed terribly. The monegasque walked you away from the entrance, not wanting the other guests to see you like that. He let you cry it all out, softly stroking your hair and holding you tight while doing so. Once again giving you what you needed without having to communicate it.

Then when you stopped, you told him what had happened. It took you back to one year prior to this event, when you stopped crying after telling the brunette you had just ran away from your boyfriend and Charles wiped off your blurred mascara and took you for a stroll during a chilly London night with his jacket around your body.

The night were it all started shaped your relationship to this day.

Oftentimes laughter followed after crying and that was what had happened. Charles started making you laugh with his wit and goofiness, making you wonder how someone can be so perfect.

Then you took a short break on a bench to take off your heels with Charles' help due to the dress restrichting you from bending down. When he finished, he took a seat next to you.

"Thank you for everything, Charles. I don't know what I'd have done without you"

"Always at your service"

"I do not take that for granted" you stated, resting your head on his shoulder. Charles then put his fingers around your chin lifting it towards his face and leaned closer to kiss you.

"We can't, I'll end up hurting you" you breathed, looking into the monegasque's eyes.

"You're worth the pain"

With these words Charles put his lips on yours, doing what he intended to do ever since you were on his yacht.

Taglist:

@pleasantducktimetravel @annoyingsaladstrawberry @buendiabebeta @leilani13gc @rosesintj @my-only-way-tocooperatewithlife @allilah @weekknds @fleetastic @xcinnamongirl @carmelita-holland @moneymasnn

[theotherbuckley]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

tagged by @nmcggg @underwaterninja13 @saybiwithme @your-catfish-friend @jesuisici33 @cal-daisies-and-briars @perfectlysunny02 @hippolotamus @wikiangela @smilingbuckley @diazsdimples @dangerpronebuddie @tizniz

How many works do you have on ao3?

18

2. What's your total ao3 word count?

92,593 !

3. What fandoms do you write for?

9-1-1 currently (previously criminal minds and lucifer)

4. Top 5 fics by kudos:

1. Because You're Exhausting 10K words (917 kudos) 2. Pancakes, kisses, and a little bit of TLC 4.8K words bucktommy (890 kudos) 3. I'll Take Care of You 5.1K words | buddie (879 kudos) 4. Cow Eyes 2.2K words | buddie (720 kudos) 5. Tripped and Fell 5.8K | buddie | E (464 kudos)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes💜 i try to respond to them all but sometimes i forget and then i feel bad because i get another comment and i cant respond to it because i didn't respond to the previous one but by then an extend period of time has passed and i feel weird about replying to the previous comment so i stop responding... oops.. also that time i go a few hate comments and it made me stop responding to comments on that fic

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Because You're Exhausting - uhhhh this is depression in 10K words its so fucking sad and you will need tissues and most of the comments on this fic are people telling me they cried so... yeah sorry about this (read the tags please for the love of god read the notes there's a lot of trigger warnings)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

There are quite a few with good happy endings but I'm especially fond of Cow Eyes i think its silly and cute

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Yeah kinda - Because You're Exhausting has got a few mostly about the ending which i to an extent can understand but if you're going to be triggered by something please for the love of god READ THE WARNINGS IN THE NOTES - i don't wanna spoil everything but the tags on its own should have been enough to go hey maybe i should read the notes too asjkdaj so yeah a few hate comments on that

9. Do you write smut?

Yes! didn't for the longest time but yes yes I do :)

10. Craziest crossover?

I don't write crossovers

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope i think if i ever did id be so honoured I'd cry

13. Have you co-written a fic before?

currently writing one with @diazsdimples <3

14. All time favorite ship?

Buddie!!! (but I am really enjoying bucktommy atm)

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Healing fic is killing me rn - I may write a lot lot of angst but seeing buck so happy on my screen is making me struggle to write depressed buck but I will write it but also uni is killing me rn. this fic is over 17K so far with no end in sight so is by far my longest which I think is why its so hard

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm good at writing depressing shit

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Like the rest? Idk I struggle with dialogue tags and switching from dialogue to prose I think

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I love it but too scared to do it because I just speak English. But I love pet names etc in other languages.

19. First fandom you wrote in?

I think Sherlock bbc on wattpad when I was a kid and then Lucifer first on ao3. Looking back these are pretty trash idk what I was thinking but we all start somewhere.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Hmmm good question. Even though Because You're Exhausting is so sad I really do like it. Also running from myself (and the memories of you) (12K) which is also depressed!Buck but it's lighter and has a happy ending. Also both my chronic pain!Buck fics make me happy. Idk this is hard I can't choose.

I won't tag anyone since most people have done it but if you wanna do it then consider this your tag!

[depressedtheatrekiddo]

Started reading Blue Beetle (2006) so here are my thoughs while I read !! <3

(spoilers below the cut!! Includes issues from 1 to 4!!)

+ "Guys don't hit girls" "Fathers do" SHE DIDN'T HESITATE I'LL KISS THE EARTH SHE WALKS ON (I'll kiss her too if she gave me one chance) AND THEN GO KILL HER DAD

+ "I don't need a babysitter!" "No, she needs medication" Jaime is the old sibling representation I deserve frfr (my guy is fighting for his life next issue and all he thinks about is about Mili taking his room 🧍🏻)

+ KLINGON!!! BRENDA I LOVE YOU!!! They're the best best friends to ever best friend!!!

+ Gross in a sibling-ly way GROSS (crossing my fingers because if they end together Istg I'll kill someone)

+ whatthefuckwhatthefuckwhatthef— A YEAR A WHOLE YEAR?????

+ "He wouldn't scare Milagro" right on the oldest sibling issues, you didn't have the right to hurt me that much Sra Reyes 😭😭 (Does she conserve her own surname? Or Reyes is hers too?)

+ JAIME'S DAD EXPLAINING HIM ALL (pulling the "perfect image" you create when you grieve and all that Jason Todd core is that what I hear) THAT AND THEN "you're my son"

+ "why do you wear a cane dad?" I'm gonna receive a classic uncle Ben am I not?

+ HE !! DOESN'T !! ACTUALLY !! KNOW !! HOW !! TO !! FIGHT !! (I love him already)

+ THE OLD MAN HIT BRENDA TO DEATH REMEMBER WHAT I SAID AT THE BEGINNING?? YEAH WELL AS PACO SAID GOOD RIDDANCE BAD TRASH I'm really happy he died :D

+ BRENDA I MISSED YOU SO MUCH <33333 (I've known her thirty minutes ago)

+ "that's fot making me worry" girl I got worried thinking about the classic kiss that always comes after that phrase thanks the gods it didn't happen 🙏

+ HER AUNT IS LA DAMA??? I mean cool, let's see how it goes(?)

+ BABS!! BABS??? BABS???!!!! ORACLE 💖💞

+ ALSO this panel BAIDGWJSJ

Me knowing nothing about birds of prey except who are on it (should I get on it? Recs?):

+ I only have something to say about this panel, a very simple word. Girlfriends.

+ Thanks gods at least Brenda's aunt will kill that older guy if he keeps being a pedophile 🫶

+ What is he even saying. (I really don't understand anything he says and it's not cause English is not my first language I assure you) I hate him UGHHH

+ THEY WERE HAVING A BEAUTIFUL MOMENT MISTER STOP RIGHT NOW 😭😭 ("Jaime knows how to make people feel better" ohmy <3)

+ Bro. TLOTR reference?? 🤨

+ "What dya mean we won't damage nature" "Nature is about to damage me" I don't know Jaime, Khaji made a pretty good point (this shit is golden I love this comic I think)

+ lmaooo Brenda and Paco shitting on the pedophile

+ Have I said I love my guy? I love him <3

[pomefioredove]

Tbh I was reading the matchup info and now I have an idea for a fic 😂😂😂

But Seriously I really love your writings. I've been having a shitty time and when I read your stuff it gets better and mellows me out ❤️

Personality wise: I can be pretty calm, but I also have my exciting/ manic moments. Like cleaning my room at 3am (cries in bd sleeping schedule). People say I'm nice, and have a good energy. But if someone pushes me (metaphorically) I will push back. I can be petty if I get fed up enough. I get depressed easily and sometimes have trouble expressing myself. Which is weird because I kind of am the therapist friend. I don't talk about my feelings or self often. Sometimes I scare my friends unintentionally, like dropping random tidbits of my life that might sound or be a little traumatic. (I.e. that reminds me of the time my mom told me she would beat my ass if I cleaned her room wring again.) I can be pretty lazy, I sleep A LOT. I am a feminist, who is pretty used to red flags in people.

Interests/ Hobbies: I love reading and trying new art stuff. I am an English major and like learning about the dirty and scary sides of History. My favorite books to read right now are classical literature and disturbing horror books. Art wise I've been trying to get into air dry sculptures. I love to crochet. And when I feel like it I can cook and bake. Sometimes I roller skate, like once in a blue moon. I have trouble with homework sometimes, I can get really distracted. When I'm really tired I won't eat. I have body issues too (thanks mom 🥲). I used to be a vegetarian for almost 10 years. I stopped a couple years ago.

Relationship wise: I like people who are competent. Like, someone who knows their way around the house or are willing to learn. I like feminists. I don't like people who yell at me. When I get into a relationship, love bombing and honeymoon phase stuff kinda turn me off ngl. (Like why r you so free on a regular Tuesday afternoon. I give you butterflies? Digest them, want some pesto bismol? Here.) Ngl, it's like why should I have to come back from a full day of work/school and clean up after you and/or make dinner.

Lifestyle wise: No lie I have depression and anxiety and it can get pretty bad. There are times where I can't take care of myself as well as I wish. I will cry, if someone makes fun of me for it. I try to keep my area clean, when I get back from work/school I clean up a little then crash. I try to deep clean on weekends if I'm not swamped from school.

Specifics: No first or second years pls

Ty 💖💖💖

I match you with 𝐕𝐢𝐥 𝐒𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐞𝐧𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐭

The First Impression:

One might assume that the first thing Vil notices in a person is their style, or their physical features, or even their body language.

Not really.

Vil absolutely judges people based on their competency, their skill, their dedication to themselves and their passions. And he can absolutely see that in you.

Why He Fell:

What initially attracts Vil is the challenge. He's always looking for new potential, and he can tell that you're both skilled and committed enough to meet his standards- but there's something holding you back. You're quite different from his past potatoes, and he's more than capable of taking a different approach to your case, one without the need for harshness.

Vil isn't one to pry, though he's able to piece together your situation from the random tidbits you drop on him, and soon, his pet project becomes more of a mission. Can't take care of yourself right now? That's fine, he'll do it for you. He'll find a way to create a perfectly manageable routine, fix your sleep schedule, help you with homework, and slowly ease you into a healthier lifestyle with him by your side.

Though he'd never admit it, Vil really likes the feeling of being needed, not just wanted. And, in time, he finds himself needing you and your company just as much.

The Relationship:

You cannot get more competent than Vil Schoenheit. Experience or not, he's a master at navigating relationships, and is more than willing to help you in that regard, as well. He's there at your best and worst, as you are for him- Vil considers the partnership very equal, and would never in a million years dream of upsetting that balance.

(Quite honestly, Vil doesn't want to be treated like an incompetent manchild who can't do anything for himself and he's glad you're on the same page)

He very much appreciates and admires your skillset, interest in learning new things, and your dedication to your passions (one isn't just vegetarian for ten years without some commitment, after all), and sees you as compatible in that regard.

It's a very mature and balanced relationship, one in which you don't even have to imagine him lovebombing or taking you for granted or acting childish. He certainly has his moments, but such is being human.

[self-indulgent-paw-patrol]

Hello! Just found your account it's very pawsome! What are your thoughts on Tracker?

Hiii, welcome to my smol blog, hope you like it here!! And aaaaa thank youuuu 🥰

Omg I love this little guy soooooo much!! When I first saw him, I immediately tried to guess his breed - that's something I've been doing with a couple friends on Telegram, I'm not checking the Wiki about the pups I didn't see in the show yet, so we have fun trying to guess their breeds once I see them for the first time. And then we check the Wiki to see if we guessed correctly.

We almost thought he was a Miniature Pinscher LMAO But then I was like "Hold on, he's talking a lot of Spanish." and we were like CHIHUAHUA???? The three of us fell in love instantly after that XDD

I also remember I laughed a lot when he used the cables for the first time exactly like in this gif you sent, I was like "OH MY GOD HE'S GONNA BE THE SPIDERDOG OF THE BUNCH I LOVE IT" - Spider Man is one of my top favorite superheroes, especially Miles Morales who also speaks Spanish, so YEAH XD

AND NOW I JUST HAD TO DO THIS so let's add one more verse into the Spider Verse AHAHAHAHAHA

Anyway, I find Tracker to be a very nice pup! He was very afraid in the beginning, and I feel him so much on the "I hear little noises most people won't hear and it drives me crazy/scared". I too have this condition where that "snail shaped" thing inside my ears is a bit more straight than curled around and that makes me hear more/louder than usual people because the sound hits straight inside the ear instead of ricocheting around before that. I can hear phones recharging in a different room than the one I'm at and that's just one example. It was nice to see him becoming braver after joining the team and living with Carlos.

On a sidenote, it's funny when he speaks Spanish because, as I'm Brazilian, I'm watching the show in Brazilian Portuguese, and the Spanish language sounds a bit like ours, so sometimes it's like he's just repeating himself, like when he says his catchphrase first in Portuguese and then in Spanish "Sou todo ouvidos! Soy todo oídos!" I guess it must sound better when he mixes Spanish with dialogues in English XD

[idiotmf]

Do you have a master list?

Hey, Anon!

Ironically I was already making one, I just didn't believe it was necessary yet.

Welp, but we shall have one now:

Masterlist

Sadly, you can apparently only pin one thing on Tumblr (which makes sense now that I think about it) so I linked it in the overview too, for good measure.

•~•~•~•~•~•~•

I'm also going to abuse your ask to ramble a little (sorry).

First of all, thank you all for 150+ followers. ❤️❤️❤️

I started posting a while ago to get an outlet for this thing that seemed so taboo and that I was actually really ashamed about, and now my phone won't stop buzzing because people keep liking or reblogging, haha.

Secondly, I'm not very satisfied with my writing, partly because English isn't my first language and partly because I have aphantasia, so imagining scenes and characters is actually really hard for me. That in turn makes it hard to find accurate descriptions for more immersion. My vocabulary is something that I can and am working on though.

I learned English in a very formal way, so my creative writing feels like a work email sometimes, I think. 😂

I also have about a metric crap ton of ideas. To the point I really can't decide what to do. If anyone actually reads this and is interested in any of these, shoot me an ask, it makes me feel forced to write something on it (in a good way, I work better under stress xD).

Here's an overview of some for little stories:

- Reader seriously misunderstood the offer of a "pie eating" contest

- All-you-can-breed (a world where humans are free to use)

- A thing about Oryllion, the not so nice shadow demon from the "House infested by shadow demons" post

- A thing about Xyon (problem with him is he's very slow burn because that's just kinda his character haha)

- A world where humans are folklore creatures that can see your future but you must nut inside them to activate the power (don't ask, I don't know)

- That one thing about finding an abandoned alien spaceship but it turns out it's not abandoned

- Something, something, deer centaur

- A story about a merman who was exiled to a lake and really hates humans (and may or may not attempt to drown them to scare them away) but he's also very horny because of course

- Ent who is seriously pissed off with the werewolf running around his forest

This... Is not all but the ones I have started collecting more ideas for, so they're more than just random prompts.

Anyways, yes, thank you again and sorry anon.

[k0ff1n]

The arsonist's analysis (Touya or however you want to call him)

It's just a really bad written character analysis.

Also I've noticed that there are some errors and sorry but pls I don't have time to correct them all.

Ok so over the least few days I kind of went back and started (re-started?) consuming content related to my hero academia, and I didn't really know what to expect since it had probably been something like 5 years  that I didn't interact with anything that revolved around it. 

Like the not so changed person that I am I decided to see how the anime and manga were doing, and not because I really like the story and all that, like sure many characters are great and all nothing to say about them, but the real reason was the same as many years ago, to see how that fucker (I mean Touya) was and if at that point he was still alive. 

All this brings me to one question: why is it that so many people have such different versions of the character in their head? I'm not saying that they are wrong or anything, everyone views things differently and all that, but at the same time it kind of makes me wonder why is it that the mental image of the character that I've found is basically like this:

So yeah it seems strange to me, especially when in the manga there are like so many parts in which we can see how he acts, and I know that some of them would vary based on the situation and the people around him  ecc ecc, but the general way in which the character acts is still one. Now I know that I'm probably gonna offend someone, I'm pretty sure of that, but pls tell me how do you see that guy and think: omg poor him he feels so insicure. 

1: The (100%) insicure and shy version (wet cat edition) 

I've seen many people, most of them on ao3 actually, that see the guy as insicure, as someone that feels like his body isn't made to be seen and that if he ever had a partner the sarcastic version of him would basically come out as some kind of defence mechanism. I mean the last part? Mmmmmh I kinda get what they mean but all the rest? Pls no. Like I can see what you are trying to say but it probably wouldn't be like that. 

It would make sense if he was insecure, it would but it doesn't completely and we can see that in the way he acted as a child when he went from scared and yes, insecure, to the "I prefer to say something mean that cuts deep so I won't have to talk to you again". The entire (even if short) dialogue between him and his mother when he went out to train by himself explains that: he surely still wants his father to see him, we have that for all of the duration of the manga, but at the same time what once was only sadness became anger, making him focus on something else and not only about how bad he had to feel because of " being a failure in the eyes of his father".

"But he still felt as if he wasn't enough"

I know that that's what you are thinking and luckily I also know that but plss give me a minute to try and explain all that but with a simple image because I'm bad at words, especially since english isn't even my first language. 

So yeah let's say that 50% of the insicure part of him is still there, I won't say stupid shit and make up that he feels nice now, we know he doesn't, so let's skip to the shy part. I'm gonna cover this quickly: we clearly see that he has never been shy since he was little, he seemed like he felt better alone but that doesn't mean he's shy. His father asked him to make friends but not because he was shy and didn't have them, it was only to not have him in his way. He basically said that because of how the other kids were he didn't want to be friends with them, so yeah he's probably more of an introvert but with more energy that it seemed (as he became older I mean). I have to say that it would also make sense if when he was little he was the type of kid that stayed by himself, mostly because he didn't feel like the other kids would be interested in him but only in the connection he had with his father. All this would make sense if we picture him as the kind of kid that would say those type of phrases that are difficult to answer to, just like the past example of the discussion he had with his mother.

Another point that I'd like to focus on is when people (not many but I've seen that as I've previously said) say that he would also be insecure not about himself in general but mostly about his body. And now I really am trying to think where I'm the way the character acts would you think that. He's wearing loose shirts that make a good part of him visible since his first appearances and when fighting in the last part he's basically shirtless. When he broadcasts the thing where he explains how he's Touya he 𝘪𝘴 shirtless, and I know that it was probably to make people see how far his father made his life a living hell, but if he really hated his body that much I don't think he would even be able to show himself to so many people. The only option left is that at this point he doesn't really care that much about how he looks, yes maybe he doesn't always like it, but it's not that everyone always likes ones look, we all know that there are days where you can't even watch your reflection in the mirror and others where you actually think that maybe you aren't so bad (if you don't I'm actually sorry but I get you lol). 

Here are some examples:

2: The mean guy that only cares about your usefulness (and body) 

This is the version that I've seen for the longest time, the one that makes people think something like "damn he's mean to me so he's hot and since he actually is attractive (and not because he's mean but shhh) then that means that it's fine if he acts in shitty ways".

Like pls no pt.2. Yeah he uses sarcasm, yeah if the situation calls for it he might say bad things but that doesn't mean that on a regular basis he would insult you and all that. I've seen many people that seem to consider him as the guy that like hits on you to have an easy fuck and then if you somehow have his number and idk text him he would barely answer. Like if we are talking on a "you met at a bar you don't know each other at all and the bathroom stall looked too inviting to not be in there together" then yes, he would probably act like that, but in the case that you do know each other and you already text him and ya know, you both care at least a little bit, then tell me why would he do that. 

Like I know he is probably shit at expressing emotions, I'm not denying that. But if he cared about you and you explained that something, anything, was making you feel bad then he would probably (we always have to consider the situation first but pls take this as the most general one) try to make you feel better, even if only a little. Would he succeed? No, I'm not one to lie to myself. Would he opt for arson in case the problem could be solved with that? Yes, yes he would. 

So all in all I don't see why he would act like that, considering the fact that he wasn't raised (manners wise) in a bad way and a part of that would still be in his head. The only time we see him say something "mean" is literally when he's dying and all the other things are basically sarcasm, said in a kind of offensive way, maybe, but not something that would cut too deep. 

3: The actual boyfriend material (no clickbait) 

So the other works that I've found were probably the best version of him. He wasn't perfect, but he also wasn't so fucking mean for no reason, he didn't 100% love himself but he also didn't cry himself to sleep because of that and all in all he actually seemed to care about the (presumably) only person he opened himself to. Unfortunately I've only found this version of him in works that seem to be kind of an au, not one that is much different from the canon one, but the whole story still isn't the same (maybe I'm wrong and sorry if I don't remember every piece perfectly). In case you haven't read them one of the best works are probably these:

-Casual (this is the first part but pls read all three)

-Peaches (you're the cream of the crop)

Like in these he actually loves you, he still is the bitch that we all love and he still isn't perfect, which is nice since he never was. Yes he feels strange to know that someone cares about him but it's not his whole personality. 

4: The final version (burnt nugget edition) 

After all this I'd say that if we consider all his backstory the realest version of him (as in partner, boyfriend, however you want to call that) would be one where there's trust between you two, even if it took 𝘴𝘰 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 and he still isn't too sure about it because as I said, he still is 25% at least insicure about his general self, but that doesn't mean that he makes the relationship fail. Also he strucks me as the type to like steal those useless books on how to improve yourself and all that shit to at least try to be enough for you. He would be a lovesick fool, yes, but one that uses sarcasm in every phrase and would call you stupid names just to see how long it would take for you to try and punch him. He would still do illegal things, habits like stealing don't just go away after your life depended on it, but he would improve. By improve I mean that he would also steal stuff you said you liked. 

Now these are probably more like headcanons and I know that but he seems like the type of guy to genuinely care about you and your opinions. If you say that a certain nail polish would look good on him be sure that you'll find it on the bathroom counter the next morning while he's there waiting for you to put it on him. Also imagine how good it would be if you went on dates together and he had a way to get gatchas for free without breaking the machine so you have free stuff without getting caught. Now idk but I think that he would have a nice alcohol tolerance too, probably because is body is damaged and if you ever ask about his opinion on a certain piercing and if it would look on you he would always say that you'd look hot with everything (he would also be already searching for a needle to pierce you but ssshhh). All in all 85% boyfriend material, the last 15% is when he wakes up feeling like shit and remembers the past but doesn't want to talk about it, opting for shutting himself away for the entire day. 

Also coming back to the looks point: his body is ruined, yes. Does he hate it? Nah. Look we know if he was irl he would probably be already dead so in fiction, in a universe where he still somehow survived in a body that was supposed to break down after a month max he probably doesn't hate it that much because it was the only thing that kept him and his hatred alive. Also idk about y'all but if my body was burnt and they told me that I would basically never feel that much pain I would too cover myself with staples and piercings  because like, we all know that those little pieces of metal don't do shit at keeping his body together and he probably decided to put those there as decorations. So the last and really meaningful phrase with which I want you to leave this post is: if you had a chance like him to customize  yourself and look like that, wouldn't you want to like have sex with yourself of something because I'm sure as hell that if he could he would.