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skrrri4theo · 2 months

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pairing: theo x fem!reader

genre: smut 🔞 (mdni)

warnings: fwb to ???, dom!theo, unprotected sex, theo and reader get a little drunk but they kinda have a high alcohol tolerance, blowjob, a bit of choking.

summary: one night, theo finally recognizes that he has feelings for you after having the best orgasm of his life with you, but...will it turn out well?

theo lets out a groan as he lies down on the cold floor of his room. he had just finished doing a random workout routine he found on youtube just to kill time while waiting for you to arrive at the apartment that you both had mutually decided to share. it was the best option for both of you for two main reasons: the first was that it would be easier for you to maintain yourselves if you split the household expenses, and the second, and even more important, to spend more time together. there was no denying the fact that you loved being with each other, doing whatever as the best friends you had become, and also the sex between you both was phenomenal, but it was just that...right?

theo was still lying on the floor, trying to steady his breathing, with his forearm covering his eyes and his mind drifting among the many thoughts that had been tormenting him lately. these thoughts all boiled down to one thing, or rather one person: you.

it wasn't that he was bothered by the fact that you were on his mind—not at all. after all, you were his best friend. what "bothered" him was the way he thought about you. the way he remembered every single detail about you, even the most trivial and insignificant ones. the way your laughter, your voice, even your moans made his heart race ridiculously fast inside his chest. the way he felt so empty when you weren't by his side, or how he had become the #1 fan of listening to your stories no matter how boring they were for others.

"why can't i stop thinking about you? why do i have to do it this way?" he asks himself as he sighs and moves his arm away from his face. he really didn't know the reason why it was specifically you that was hanging around in his head? or maybe he was so stubborn as to not want to accept the fact that perhaps he had broken your mutual agreement of "no feelings, just sex"? whatever it was, he didn't want to think about it right now.

he closed his eyes, and a few seconds later, he heard the front door open and then close. moments later, some knocking on his bedroom door made him startle a bit. "y/n? the door is open, come in" he says aloud, knowing it's you. then you peeked your head out and smiled tenderly at your friend, uttered a soft "hi" and then entered the room fully, your hands behind your back holding the reason why you had arrived later than usual.

theo propped himself up on his elbows to observe you. you were wearing a tight black skirt that reached just above the middle of your thighs and a white strappy top that resembled a corset, with lace details that deliciously accentuated your tits, those that drove your best friend so crazy. in fact, everything about you made him lose his mind, from your hair, your shoulders, your boobs, your abdomen, your waist, your ass, god, that ass was his biggest obsession and downfall. he loved how it felt under his hands, its size, its shape, your legs, everything about you. not to mention your face, your expressions when you laughed, cried, got angry, or your expression of total pleasure when he fucked you mercilessly in any corner of the apartment. theo bit his lip as his gaze roamed over every part of your body with total brazenness, stopping only when his eyes met yours. you let out a snort.

"what's so funny?" he asks with genuine curiosity.

"are you done eye-fucking me yet or do you need more time?" you replied somewhat amused and watched as he framed a sly smile on his face that could make anyone weak in the knees.

"baby, believe me, if you give me more time i'm gonna do more than just fuck you with my eyes, is it my fault you look so sexy right now?"

you decided to ignore his comment (and your burning cheeks) and shrugged, then you slowly approached him and then sat down on the floor next to him and he sat up to be in the same position as you.

"what you got there by the way?" he asked glancing behind your back, but you were quicker to pull out the bottle of wine, today you wanted to have a good time with your dear best friend and fuck buddy.

"tada! look what i bought. tell me i'm not the best friend anyone could have?" you asked, battering your eyelashes at him and expecting a "yes" in response. theo took the wine bottle, admiring it for a moment before answering your question.

"yes, y/n, you're the best for remembering your best friend's favorite wine brand"

best friend. his own words echoed in his head and, inevitably, the smile on his face faded gradually as his thoughts grew louder.

"hey...did something happen? you were gone all of a sudden" you asked with concern, placing a hand on his shoulder.

theo snapped out of his mini trance and looked at you intently, finally saying everything was fine. he didn't understand why he suddenly got bummed out since, in the end, he was nothing more than that, your best friend...with whom you occasionally shared orgasms.

"alright, i'll go get a couple of glasses, i'll be right back" you said, but he stopped you with a hand on your wrist "no need, we can drink from the bottle" he gives you a smile and you nod in agreement.

"and...may i know what you were doing before i arrived?" you asked, watching as theo opened the bottle, the way his veins stood out prominently from the effort making you swallow and wet your lips. he interrupted your perverse thoughts with his answer.

"just a workout routine i saw on youtube, nothing special" he said casually, taking a sip from the bottle after uncorking it, then passing it to you to do the same. you took it and drank a long sip without taking your eyes off his.

if there was one thing you loved the most about your best friend, it was undoubtedly his eyes. his gaze so commanding and intense that it could make anyone give in to him. you loved how his eyes seemed to transmit what words couldn't, you loved how his gaze would pierce into you and begin to undress you and devour you with it, shit, you loved how his eyes sought yours in the most intimate moments, when he was sunk into you, when he was between your legs, when his cock was touching the back of your throat, you loved all of that...and you loved him. it wasn't something you could deny, at this point of your "situationship" it was impossible for you not to feel more than a simple attraction and friendship for the one you called your best friend, you didn't know for sure if he was experiencing something like that too, but if that wasn't the case, it wasn't that you would mind having what you had with him forever.

a snap of fingers made you wake up from your trance, theo had his hand in front of your face and when you turned to see him, he had a mocking gesture in his.

"damn, i know you love my lips, but that much? you stared at them for like a minute straight without even blinking" he said before chucking. your cheeks tinged with a subtle red and you rolled your eyes at his egocentrism, but you didn't deny it, as it wasn't a lie.

approximately two hours passed, the bottle of wine was empty on the floor, neither of you realized at what point the time had passed because between laughter, chats and flirting, you lost track of it.

you were lying on theo's lap (who seemed unaffected by the alcohol) while he played with strands of your hair and looked at you attentively as you hummed a melody.

"what song is that?" he asks "i don't know" you laugh a bit "i think i'm a little drunk and right now i don't remember" you pouted.

he found you adorable and smiled. he stopped caressing your hair to focus entirely on your face. the way your eyes looked up at him from below had him engrossed. they were so beautiful that he could stare into them for hours and get lost in them. his gaze then shifted to your nose, which he found to be the cutest and most endearing feature about you. after a while, his eyes lingered on your lips, the ones he loved to kiss and feel all over his body, the ones he yearned for day and night, the ones he loves to have and feel around him...shit, he needed to control his thoughts.

unconsciously, he runs his thumb over them, tracing the outline of your lower lip, feeling its softness, and then slides it into your mouth. he bites his lip and takes a deep breath when he feels you sucking on it and your tongue playing with it.

"fuck, y/n" he whispers, to which you respond with a "mhm?" accompanied by an innocent expression on your face that drives him crazy, he removes his finger from your mouth and his hand now goes to your neck to squeeze it slightly, you gasp.

"you love to provoke me, don't you?" he says a little close to your face so as not to miss any expression you make, "maybe" you reply and smile provocatively before sitting up, ending upon your calves.

"taeng...i need you" you let him know, running your hand up and down his thigh desperately and with a pout formed on your lips, theo can't resist and kisses you, you reciprocate his kiss in the same desperate way as you move closer to his body and run your hand over his boner above his pants, he lets out a sigh, grabbing your hand and applying more pressure on his bulge, you lower your gaze toward it and biting your lip, you look him in the eyes.

"i'm feeling so horny, taeng, i need to choke on your cock" you said without any shame and pressing his dick harder. he hums and smiles mischievously at you, then grabs a handful of your hair in his hand and pulls you to his face, speaking dangerously close.

"and what are you waiting for, doll?" he asks and his gaze falls on your lips that were red and swollen due to the intense makeout from a few moments ago, "stop talking and put that pretty little mouth of yours to work" and without further ado, you grabbed the elastic of his pants along with his boxers and pulled them down, theo lifted his hips a little to make it easier for you to undress him, you licked your lips as you saw his hard cock pop out and land on his abdomen, his red tip already spurting pre-cum.

you didn't hesitate to wrap your hand around it, giving it a gentle squeeze that made theo throw his head back and moan, that prompted you to move your hand up and down, not before spitting some of your saliva on it. the expressions of pleasure on your best friend's face were a total delight, you loved how his adam's apple went up and down and his soft gasps faltered as you increased the speed of your hand on his member; this man was a god at his finest.

"a–ah, y/n, use your mouth, you said you would" he looked at you pleading "please, suck me off" you clenched around nothing at his request and decided to obey, getting on your knees without stopping your ministrations on his dick, him following with his eyes every move you made, you leaned your torso down and started kissing his length, starting from the tip all the way to the base, occasionally giving him little licks.

theo's moans were soon heard, he was stroking your hair softly, enjoying the sensation of your tongue running all over his cock and each of the veins that were visible on it, squeezing his eyes and lips when you ran it over his sensitive tip and stopped there for a while to draw circles on it.

you were so immersed in it that you were surprised to feel a slap on your ass. you whimpered and squeezed his cock in response. he hissed, and the same hand that had spanked you was now holding a fistful of your hair tightly to make you look at him.

"i know what you're doing, stop teasing me and put it in your mouth for fuck's sake", you couldn't even react to his words because he guided your face towards his dick, grabbing it by the base and brushing the tip against your lips.

"open" he said in a demanding tone, his husky voice making you wet your panties even more. you obeyed and he let out the most delicious moan when his cock finally made its way into your mouth. not wanting to waste another second, you started sucking it and bobbing your head up and down, slow and controlled. theo was addicted to your blowjobs...and to you, but you didn't need to know that, right?

you began to increase the speed of your movements while helping yourself with your hands, at times trying to take it all the way down your throat. gagging and wet sounds filled the room along with your best friend's moans and grunts.

"yes–fuck, just like that, oh my god" he closed his eyes and threw his head back, enjoying what you were doing to him, "shit, why do you have to be so good?" he managed to say without his voice breaking from the pleasure, and you responded with a muffled moan. then he realized that he didn't want anyone else to have you this way, nor did he want you to make anyone else feel this way, he wanted you all to himself. maybe it was selfish, but at this point, he didn't care.

just thinking that there was a possibility that someone other than him might have you made his blood boil within his veins, something that honestly surprised him since he had never experienced such a thing as "jealousy" before with someone else, which at this moment his own thoughts were generating in him. he then leans against the wall behind him, and with one hand on the back of your neck and your hair tangled in the other, he moves your head up and down on his cock, caring little if you can't breathe, or if you gagged each time the tip touched the back of your throat, or the tears that threatened to spill from your eyes. you could only grip his thighs and let him use you at his whim. maybe he was being a bit rough and harsh with you, but you honestly loved it.

you heard him mutter something under his breath that you couldn't understand because of the dirty sounds his cock was making as it fucked your mouth, but you didn't pay it any mind.

theo lets out a deep, rough moan that sends shivers down your spine "fuck, wait," he tells you as he stops the movements of your head "i don't wanna cum yet" his heavy breathing and the way his jaw was clenched indicated he was close "i need to fuck you" he pulls you closer to his face and run his tongue over your lips, tasting his own essence in the process "and i need you to fuck me" you whispered with a sensual and a pleading tone.

both of you got up and made your way to the bed between kisses and groping. he laid you down on the bed, and his kisses moved from your mouth to your neck, where he left visible marks. you both had agreed not to leave evidence of what you did behind closed doors, after all, only the two of you knew. you wanted to scold him for that, but the only thing coming out of your mouth were small moans of pleasure. even so, you managed to say "you seem a bit possessive today" while he continued to leave wet kisses all over your neck and collarbones "is that a bad thing?" he asked, very close to your ear, taking the opportunity to bite your earlobe.

and...no, it wasn't bad, in fact you didn't dislike it at all, but of course you wouldn't admit that out loud, so instead of responding, you took his hand and directed it under your panties, making him feel how wet and needy you were, you moaned from the contact and watched him lower his gaze to where his hand was, he licked his lips as his fingers moved, enjoying the slippy sensation of your pussy.

"god, you're wetter than ever," he looked into your eyes and inserted a finger inside you, causing you to gasp and tighten around him "and as tight as always" he added a second finger, moving them in and out of you at a steady rhythm. it felt good, but nothing compared to the feeling of being filled by his pretty cock.

"taeng, please...i can't take it anymore," you whined "i need you to put it in me now" you knew he couldn't resist your pleas, especially when you made that slutty face, hungry for his dick.

"i love hearing you beg for my cock, you want it that much, doll?" a smug smile appeared on his face as he held his still-hard cock by the base and began stroking it in front of you.

"hm yes, i need it deep inside me" you bent your legs and spread them apart, running your panties to the side, showing him where you wanted him. theo almost drooled at the sight you provided "i want you to fuck me 'til i forget my own name" and you rubbed your fingers in your own wetness. theo exclaimed a "fuck" and decided not to waste any more time. he placed one hand on your inner thigh while the other grabbed his cock and torturously slid it over your folds, drawing random shapes on your clit with the tip. oh, he loved teasing you.

"you want me to go crazy, don't you?" you shot him a frustrated look "what are you waiting–oh fuckkk!" you couldn't even finish the sentence because theo interrupted you by shoving his cock completely inside you, and without waiting for you to adjust to the sensation, he started ramming you brutally against the mattress, his hands squeezing the back of your thighs so hard that his fingers would surely be marked on them.

"you wanted this so fucking bad, huh?" he spat, wrapping his hand around your neck and then lowering his face to the level of yours to whisper into your lips, "now take it" he bit your lower lip with some force before releasing it, you couldn't hold back and moaned against his mouth, your eyes rolled back as theo freed your breasts from your pretty blouse and started sucking on your hard nipples, straightening up a bit only to take off his shirt and return to them, nibbling on the rest of your tits.

"hmm, they're so perfect," you blushed at his comment, he was being too flattering "i love them" he finished saying before pulling away from them and grabbing your waist to keep fucking you hard, both of your moans gretting louder. you delighted in the view of his torso with a light sheen of sweat, the delicious expression on his face reflecting pure pleasure, with his eyebrows furrowed, his lips slightly parted allowing you to hear his groans and sighs, his long, silky hair sticking to his forehead from the sweat. at the sight, you couldn't help but squeeze your walls around him, causing him to let out a loud moan.

"d–don't do that", you ignored him and did it again, both of you moaning at the same time. he then stopped his thrusts, staying inside you. "fuck, i almost came" he said in a low voice, breathing even more heavily. you'd be lying if you said you weren't close to coming as well.

"and why did you stop?" you asked, another pout appearing on your face as you caressed his arms, "i didn't want to do it in this position" he replied as he pulled out of you and chuckled at the confusion on your face "i want you to ride me, baby" then he lay down with his back against the bed and patted his thighs, giving you the invitation to come to him, you stripped off your skirt and panties and he did the same with his pants and underwear, without wasting another second you positioned yourself on top of him, with your legs on either side of his body, you took his cock and ran the tip along your folds before slowly sitting down on it, you both cursed, you for feeling full of him again and him for feeling the warmth of your tight pussy.

"shittt, you feel so good, y/n" he praises you, holding your waist with both hands. you start moving your hips up and down, with your hands resting on his chest to help you go faster and faster. you stop for a second when your best friend pulls your blouse over your head to take it off, leaving you both completely naked. his hands instantly go to your tits, squeezing them and making circles on your nipples with his thumbs, enjoying the sounds coming out of your mouth and your ecstatic expression. now your hips were moving in circles and you felt his cock vibrating inside you as he let out growls that only made your pussy get incredibly wetter.

"ahh, y/n, you're gonna drive me crazy if you keep moving like that" he was able to say without his voice coming out choppy and with his hands gripping your hips too tightly. theo looked at your figure on top of him; your body all sweaty with your hair messy, your breasts swaying to the rhythm of your movements, your look of pure lust, your flushed cheeks and your lower lip caught between your teeth. definitely a sight worthy of a postcard, a sight he would never tire of admiring, a sight he would hate to share with anyone else. he didn't want anyone else to see you the way he sees you, he couldn't bear it...not anymore.

he needed to make you his, to make you feel his, so he took your arms and pulled you towards him to kiss you with an intensity and desperation that was hard for you to match. theo planted his feet on the mattress, grabbed you by the waist and began to pound into you frantically from below. you audibly gasped at the new rhythm and your mouth hung open, but no sound came out. you lifted yourself off his chest and turned to look at your best friend, his gaze burning into you. it was so laden with desire and another emotion you couldn't decipher.

"fuuckk, it feels so good, taeng, don't you dare to–ahh, fuck–stop now" you warn him with your arms trembling on his chest, trying to stay upright, "i'm not planning on doing it, angel" your heart skipped a beat hearing him call you by that nickname, and you inevitably blushed even more than you already were. you just hoped he hadn't noticed.

you lay completely against his chest and buried your face in the crook of his neck, trying to muffle your moans that were turning into screams. the hands that were gripping your waist made their way to your ass and squeezed it as theo impossibly increased the speed with which he fucked you, his pelvis slamming into yours at an unrestrained pace.

"fuckfuckfuck keep going, mmhgg" you felt like you were in heaven. at this point, you were so ecstatic that nothing else was on your mind but your best friend. the way he was making you feel couldn't compare to other times; he was being so rough, and you loved it like that.

after a while, you felt him throbbing inside you and you knew he was about to cum, because of that and how his moans were getting more and more audible and his thrusts more erratic, his face twisted in pure pleasure, and the way he clung to your body as if his life depended on it.

"ahhh, shit, y/n, i–i'm fucking clos–holy f...uck" he uttered weakly "please, cum inside me, baby, i want you to fill me up" you beg agitatedly in his ear "fuck– i will" he says, continuing to assault your pussy and wrapping his arms around your waist, making your bodies even closer together, if that was even possible.

the lewd sound of him rapidly thrusting in and out of you along with the sound of your pretty moans and your throbbing cunt sucking his cock led him to the most devastating orgasm he had ever had, he sunk his teeth into your shoulder and clenched his eyes shut as he released everything inside you, just as you had asked, staining your inner walls white with his hot seed, you followed him only a second later, calling his name between whimpers, panting and tensing your muscles, relaxing them when the orgasm faded.

it was so intense. that's how you and theo would describe what you just experienced, no more, no less, you could still feel your hearts beating a thousand per hour even after a minute of such an explosion.

"wow" was all you could say, "wow, indeed" theo exclaimed, trying to catch his breath. you shuddered when you felt his fingers gently and delicately caressing your back, "what was that?" you asked once you had calmed down.

"that...was one of the best orgasms i've ever had, if not the best" you didn't know why his response made your heart beat like crazy again, but for some reason, you were happy to hear that.

"you're welcome" you look up at him with big eyes and give him a sincere smile. he smiled back, and you were about to get up to clean yourself as part of the routine, but theo didn't let you, pulling you close with his arms "wait...let's stay like this for a little while, okay?" you were confused but didn't object. after all, you didn't mind being like this with him, so you let him.

the way he was stroking your hair, your back, your arms, it all felt so...intimate, even more than other times. i mean, yes, you'd had countless encounters that ended with you on top of each other, but nothing beyond that. this time it felt different; it was different, and both of you knew it.

"do you wanna know what i was thinking while you were on top of me?" he blurted out "hmm?" you lifted your head to look at him and noticed a soft smile adorning his beautiful face "i was thinking about how pretty you looked, how perfect it would be to have you like that just for me and how fucking jealous i would be if others could appreciate that" you saw him get a little frustrated "fuck, what i'm trying to say is that...i like you, a lot" he finally admits "i don't know how it happened and i don't know what to do about it, but the only thing i know is that i don't want this to ever end but i don't want you to be someone else's either" he sighed heavily and closed his eyes, feeling the regret setting in and thinking about what to say next to avoid an awkward silence, but you interrupted him before he could add anything else, "let's take a chance" you said without thinking, your heart was beating frantically inside your chest since theo started confessing to you so suddenly "we could make it work" your best friend's face...or well, you no longer knew what your relationship would be from now on, lit up and he felt a great relief knowing that maybe (undoubtedly) you felt the same way he did about you.

he took your face in his hands and kissed you, hoping that kiss would convey all the unspoken emotions he hadn't been able to express with words.

"so...would you like to be only mine, handsome?" you asked playfully and in a flirtatious way when the kiss ended, looking at him with sparkling eyes as you waited for a response. he giggles and kisses your nose.

"i'm already yours."

a/n: hihi :) this is my first writing ever and omg i'm so nervous but happy at the same time bc i finally got the courage to do something i've been wanting to do for quite some time and now i did it! i've been working on this for so long now and i still don't know if i'm entirely satisfied with what i did, but i hope you guys like it more than i do. btw sorry if there's any typos or grammar mistakes, english is not my first language and i'm still learning day by day hehe :p also this ended up being longer than i expected oopsie.

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kyokutsu-sama · 6 months

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Helloooo, had a request I’m sure could be interesting: How would the captains (current or prior) react to having a tiny S/O who can out drink most people? I’m talking like, keeping up with Rangiku and Ikkaku but still pretty lucid?

I’m mostly curious about Shunsui, Byakuya, Kenpachi, and Jushiro may handle it. Though I’m also curious how some former captains may react if you feel up to it!

Also love your work by the way!

A/n: Hi @bluandtherestlesshands!! I hope you're well. I'm glad to know that you're enjoying my work here, thank you❤️

I saw your request and it's very interesting and writing these four's reactions was fun. I hope you like it😊

Tw: Mention of alcohol

_____________________________

Shunsui :

He immediately fell in love right away. He's very resistant to alcohol but to a certain extent unlike his s/o.

He will question them about the "secret" that makes them handle so much alcohol without getting drunk. His partner just tell him that there is no secret and that it is something "natural", let's say.

He will love going out with them to drink every night or even during the day. They become his drinking buddy.

Nanao will probably forbid him from hanging out with them so that he doesn't get distracted from his duties as captain by trying to see if he can outdo them in drinking.

He would probably have to be carried by his partner after a long night of drinking.

Byakuya :

He's not someone who likes to indulge in alcohol like Shunsui, but seeing that his s/o can keep up with him is something to admire.

This nobleman is someone who drinks only on occasions and when the occasion demands it, he will have less resistance than his partner who one day tries to challenge him to drink.

Byakuya (to honor the surname Kuchiki) will accept the challenge.Bad ideia...

It will be funny and unique to see his partner carrying you home while he can't take a step without tripping. He's weak and his legs are shaking, he knew his pride had gone too far this time.

Everyone will comment on what happened since it's not every day that you see a classy nobleman come home completely drunk.

Kenpachi :

A big man like him certainly doesn't get drunk with so little alcohol. His partner, although tiny, manages to surpass this man and still stay sober.

Of course this man loves a good challenge on the battlefield but don't let that fool you, he's competitive in everything. Drinking will be no exception.

He will tell his s/o to sit in front of him while the division members bring the drinks for both of you.

He warns at the beginning that he won't stop until he defeats them, but the truth is that his partner will drink enough to make him regret starting that challenge.

Yes, he regrets it, but he doesn't admit it.

Result: He ends up with a hangover so bad he can't get out of bed. He probably doesn't even remember the person he was competing with.

Jushiro :

Regarding Jushiro, I always had the idea that he doesn't get drunk easily either. I'm sure he's the one who takes care of Shunsui when he gets drunk.(Like that one friend who always takes care of everyone at parties)

Seeing that he has a s/o who has a high tolerance for alcohol makes him praise them for it, especially when he sees that Rangiku looks like an amateur around them.

When his s/o invites him to drink, he even finds himself shaking in his boots because he already knows he won't be able to join them in drinking.

Shunsui will laugh at his friend because he is completely red from the drink and almost falling into weakness. Please someone help this man, he is a sick man.

He will often pretend he is feeling ill so he doesn't drink because he knows he can't handle it (Even though he regrets having lied)

#bleach #bleach fandom #gotei 13 #shunsui kyoraku #zaraki kenpachi #jushiro ukitake #byakuya kuchiki #bleach x reader #bleach headcanons #bleach imagines #headcanons

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scekrex · 3 months

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Could you do an Adam x Angel Reader where their relationship is toxic(?) based on a song called 'Love Me Dead' but instead of female pronouns it's replaced with male pronouns? The song has female pronouns so I'm just imagining it with male pronouns.

Gosh I love that song so much! Gimme more song fic requests guys I love writing em ueuch

Love me dead

pairing: Adam x male!reader

warnings: language, toxic relationship, irresponsible use of alcohol

note: not beta read bc fuck you

Love me cancerously/Like a salt-sore soaked in the sea/High-maintenance means you’re a gluttonous king/Narcissistic and mean

Adam. The first man was quite the complicated topic to talk about, not only when you were talking to him but also when you were talking about him to your friends. Never in your existence before had you met a person as selfish and self-absorbed as the so beloved first man. You couldn’t understand how so many people liked - let alone tolerated - him, you couldn’t understand why so many people were attracted to his disgusting and truly rotten character. And yet you were one of those people who found him attractive - that was the thing you hated the most about yourself. You loved this man with your entire heart while at the same time every single cell of your body held hatred for the brunette man sitting on the couch in your living room.

Kill me romantically/Fill my soul with vomit then ask me for a piece of gum/Bitter and dumb, you’re my sugarplum/You’re awful, I love you

With a deep sigh that left your body in frustration you grabbed yourself a drink - it wasn’t something hard, just a light drink that would make it just that much easier to have him around. You weren’t quite sure how you did it, but you had managed to charm the angel up quite well, you had him wrapped around your finger while at the same time the both of you were very aware of how much you hated each other - because one thing was for sure: the hatred you felt was mutual, the brunette on your couch hated your guts just as much as you hated his and to that very day it amazed you that he was still willing to call himself your boyfriend - fuck it wasn’t even a private relationship, Heaven knew you were dating and in public he seemed so proud and prideful of it. In private, when it was just you and him in your shitty apartment things were different though.

He moves through moonbeams slowly/He knows just how to hold me/And when his edges soften/His body is my coffin

You emptied the glass in your hand, watching the man from the counter of your kitchen as you refilled your glass. Adam looked beautiful, just sitting there in the dimmed lights of your living room, watching whatever the fuck it was that he was watching and sipping on the can filled with beer in his hand. A shiver ran through your body at how disgusted you were by your own thoughts, you knew you should throw him to the flames, forget about him and move on to either live your best single life or find someone worthy of your love - because Adam deserved many things in your eyes but none of them were positive or even slightly nice. And yet there he was, hanging out at his boyfriend’s house, sipping a cold beer, seeming quite happy with the situation. The glass in your hand was empty again before you even knew it and you decided to simply grab the bottle instead, there was no use in refilling the glass over and over again. There was not enough alcohol in this house to numb your feelings for Adam anyway.

I know he drains me slowly/He wears me down to bones in bed/Must be the sign in my head, it says:

“Love me dead,” you mumbled to yourself as you took a swig from the bottle and headed over to the disgustingly small couch. With yet another sigh you sat down next to Adam, trying to bring as much space between the two of you as possible. The brunette turned his head to look at you for a moment, his eyebrow raised, he asked, “What was that?” But you simply shook your head as you tilted your head back, resting it against the shitty backrest of your shitty couch and took another swig from the bottle, “Nothing.” That was seemingly enough of an answer for the first man because he shrugged and returned his attention back to the TV, which caused you to sigh again. All of this felt so wrong and yet so right and perfect. You wanted to kick him out and pull him close against your chest at the same time so the only logical choice was to lean your head against his shoulder, eyes roaming over the TV to figure out what sort of trash the first man was watching.

You’re a faith healer on TV/You’re an office park without any trees:/Corporate and cold, gushing for gold, leave me alone

You noticed how Adam watched you out of the corner of his eyes for a moment, his body felt tense against yours before he exhaled loudly and wrapped the arm in which he held the can of beer around your shoulders, pulling you in a little closer. Being able to see him up close you realized how tired the first man seemed and you couldn’t name whether it was from Sera’s demands or from your relationship - it was most likely both though. Your body shuddered in surprise as the gleaming golden feathered wing next to you was stretched by Adam and curled around you in protection, giving you the false feeling of comfort and love. It wasn’t that the brunette didn’t love you, he did. But he didn’t love you like normal angels loved, he hated that he loved you, no one else did that. Well no one except for you.

You suck so passionately/You’re a parasitic psycho, filthy creature finger-banging my heart/You call me up drunk, does the fun ever start?/You’re hideous and sexy

You leaned up a little, careful not to spill any liquid from the bottle in your hand or from the can in Adam's and pressed a kiss to his jaw in return of having the golden feathered wing wrapped around him. The brunette grabbed the seemingly empty can with his free hand - the one that was not wrapped around you and had just been resting on his thigh - and put it on the dirty little coffee table in front of the couch. Then he turned towards you, his touch was so gentle, so caring and if you would be unaware of how much he hated you deep within him, you would’ve thought of his touch as sincere. But that wasn’t the world you were living in and yet you decided to lean into his touch and let him guide you closer to him. In the meantime he grabbed the bottle from your hand and put it down on the coffee table right next to his can.

How’s your new boy?/Does he know about me?/You’ve got the mark of the beast/You’re born of a jackal, you’re beautiful

Gently his lips brushed against yours, starting a soft and slow kiss as the hand that had been resting on your shoulder due to how his arm was wrapped around your body trailed down your body to grab your hips in stark contrast to the soft kiss. His touch was firm, demanding and maybe even a little possessive - though that could’ve just been your imagination. The brunette growled against your lips as he pulled you flush against his body before he effortlessly lifted you up and placed you in his lap, keeping you close against him. The soft fingertips on your jaw slid down to your throat and you felt how his entire palm pressed against it - the touch itself remained soft though.

He moves through moonbeams slowly/He knows just how to hold me/And when his edges soften/His body is my coffin

Adam’s wings closed around your body, trapping you against his body and if you were honest you didn’t mind it at all, you liked the way his soft feathers tickled your neck, the way his fingertips pressed into the skin of your waist, holding you firm enough to make it bruise and in God’s mighty name, you even liked the thought of carrying bruises caused by the first man on your body. The pace of Adam’s lips against yours grew a little hungrier, a little rougher and slowly started to match the tight grip on your waist - a soft groan fell from your lips and bled into the steamy growing kiss.

I know he drains me slowly/He wears me down to bones in bed/What ‘bout the sign on my head? It says:

“Love me dead,” Adam growled against your lips, causing your body to vibrate quite violently.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel adam #adam x male reader #male reader #adam x y/n #adam x reader #adam x you #hazbin adam

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shadowsingercassia · 24 days

Text

Mad Woman | Remember that, even Ladies have their limits

Tamlinxreader (but make it toxic) and Lucienxreader

Inspired by the song mad woman by Taylor Swift!

Summary: You were the Lady of Spring. Despite your protests, your father - a high-ranking Lord - thought it was for the best. Tamlin was never loving, you had gotten used to it. And after a hookup with Lucien, you discovered Tamlin cheated, and your tolerance came to an end.

Warnings: angst (bring the tissues bb!) hookup, cheating, violence... and murder 🤭 (note that it's descriptive, very descriptive, but what can I say, I love my violence descriptive 😃), and also mentions of severed heads, abuse, nudity (nothing much) and slight language

Words: 2.9k (well oops-)

Everyone knows where I'm going with this right? Right...?

The Lady of Spring. Always so contained, so calm. Tolerant, that was what you were. Never complaining or protesting, just tolerating Tamlin's behavior.

Gathered around in a royal ball, Tamlin laughed with a crowd of high-ranking Lords. Alcohol reeked in the air. Ale, wine, liquor. You referred from drinking, wanting to be on your best behavior as a Lady.

It was never easy, to act like that, to be defiant and everything. Watching from the sidelines as the Lords did whatever they wanted, said whatever they wanted, while you sat there, unable to do anything.

Your father thought it was for the best - the wedding - and you couldn't refuse him. You didn't want to admit it, but at times, you feared him. It really wasn't very hard to do so, considering he would always make threats and, most times, deliver on them.

So, you had married Tamlin. He was never loving. You didn't expect him to be, but at nights, as you lay there in bed, you wondered if perhaps he loved you, even a tad.

And even now, as you watched him, drunkenly talking, his words slurring together, you hoped. But that was also short-lived as you heard his words.

"Y/n is just a toy for me, I shouldn't have made her a Lady in the first place, better off as a whore anyways." They laughed, Tamlin joining them. Clenching your fingers into tight fists, you resisted the urge to break his nose.

Yet, as much as you were angry, enraged even, a sadness lingered in you. A whore, a toy, that was what he thought of you. An object to use. It disgusted you, it enraged you, it hurt you.

His golden hair was left loose, hanging past his shoulders. Green overcoat long ago discarded, he was left in his white button up, and even that was halfway undone.

You watched.

Laughter dying in their throats, Tamlin's eyes landing on yours, hardening as they met your gaze. You had gotten used to it - his hard glances. Quickly, he averted his gaze back to the other Lords.

For the rest of the night, they drunk and laughed, talking shit about you, and you had never considered your Fae hearing to be as much of a curse as it was right now.

Retiring early for the night, you padded towards you and Tamlin's shared bedroom. Your soft steps echoed through the empty hallways, the heels you wore clinking slightly against the marble floor.

The empty corridors of the palace brought you comfort, calmed you down when you couldn't tolerate Tamlin's behavior. Tonight was no different.

Despite your anger, that you had learned to shove down, there was that other part of you. That part, sadness, lingering deep in your chest. You were unhappy, not that anyone really cared.

Tears welled in your eyes, and no matter how much you refused to let them fall, they did, wetting your cheeks. Your lip wobbled as you held the rest back, throat burning with the effort.

"Y/n."

Tamlin.

Using the thin sleeve of your dress to wipe away the evidence of your tears, you turned to face him. Moonlight illuminated his strands, making them seem as if they glowed.

You could only hope he didn't perceive the silver that had lined your eyes, or the kohl that left a faint trail of black.

"Stop crying, it's pathetic." Of course he saw it.

His words only made the tears build up, but you feverishly blinked them back. Tamlin saw that too. With steady steps he approached you and stopped right in front of you.

Tamlin raised his hand, fingers closing around your chin in a firm grip, not enough to hurt, just enough to pass as a warning. "I said, stop crying, you're pathetic, you know that? You would be so much easier to handle as a whore."

Pressing your lips in a tight line, you bit your tongue, not daring to speak back. You would be obedient rather than executed.

Anger in a woman was considered insanity in the Spring Court. Snapping at someone, talking back, arguing, hurting someone physically, it was all considered madness.

You had seen it before, various women showing their true feelings, and then being executed. They haunted you, in your deepest nightmares. You saw them, their severed heads as they whispered to you. Urging you to snap.

Oh, and how you wanted to. But something held you back, telling you it wasn't worth it. You knew it was. It had to be, but you couldn't. For some reason, you couldn't, and it irritated you.

Gods, you wanted to do many things. Argue, speak back, show your colors, and in the top of that list... was revenge.

He spoke again, "collect yourself," his tone was almost threatening. Normally, if he had used that tone two months ago, you would have flinched, but now you had grown used to it and held his gaze. A minor act of defiance.

Letting go of your jaw, he delivered a slap to your face. Pain stung you as his fiery eyes met yours. A warning, a threat. You hated it.

Tamlin had never went as far as to hit you, but tonight was different somehow. Perhaps it was the alcohol, the scent clinging to him as his breath mingled with yours. Or maybe it was just Tamlin wanting to show his power.

Wanting to show you that you were utterly powerless. Silently, you vowed to yourself that one day... one day, you would prove him wrong.

He left, shoulder intentionally bumping into yours as he shoved past you. His steps echoed through the corridors, and then faded away. As you turned and looked over your shoulder, he headed towards the gardens.

Subconsciously, your fingers brushed against your cheek where he'd slapped you. It stopped hurting, and thankfully, it wasn't enough to leave any imprint.

Warning.

Threat.

But two could play this game.

And you knew, that scorpions sting when fighting back.

Heading back into your shared bedroom, you stopped off the heavy ballgown, that had bothered you all night and slipped into a steaming hot shower.

You had let yourself soak in the water as its warmth enveloped you, muscles relaxing. It was refreshing, really, to have a few moments to yourself, in peace.

Reaching out, you grabbed a bottle of shampoo, the familiar scent of jasmine and fresh flowers hitting your nostrils. It smelled divine, and you had always loved that scent.

Tamlin liked it too, and most nights, he urged you to use the shampoo. The thought alone made you place it back where it was. Sighing, you sank deeper into the bathtub, water caressing your chin.

This time, you wouldn't let him feel the satisfaction of having you wrapped in a scent he loved.

And so you just slipped out of the bath, as the droplets of water rolled down your back in thick rivulets. It dripped down to the tiles of the bathroom.

Too tired of drying your hair, you simply wrapped a towel around yourself, and slowly made your way to the bed. Tamlin would probably be pissed off in the morning, when he would return in the night and find the bed wet.

But you found yourself not caring as you slipped beneath the covers, craving their warmth and drifting off to sleep.

***

He was nowhere to be seen.

As your eyelids fluttered open, you glanced over at Tamlin's side of the double bed. He wasn't there, in fact it looked as if he hadn't slept all night. Maybe he didn't sleep here.

Honestly, you didn't particularly care, but curiosity sparked inside your chest. With the towel still around your body, as you hadn't bothered to change, you walked around the manor, barefoot.

Searching for him.

For anyone, it would seem as if you were overreacting. Or desperate. Perhaps even both.

You opened the door to the guest bedroom. Tamlin wasn't there either. Closing the door behind you with a soft click, your gaze scanned the room. A four-poster bed sat in the middle, sheets and pillows arranged perfectly on top. Green and golden hues made the rest of it. Curtains, rugs, all painted in the colors of the Spring Court.

Walking over to one of the walls, your fingers brushed against the armoire, savoring the texture of the wood. Then, you moved towards another wall, bracing your palms on the empty desk.

Deep breaths. Inhale. Exhale.

Inhale.

Exhale.

A soft click signaled a person's arrival. But it wasn't Tamlin, no, the presence. You knew it.

Lucien.

His scent of firewood and cinnamon swirled in the air and if he saw the towel you were wearing and how little it did to conceal your body, he didn't dare comment on it.

Even with your back turned to him, you picked up on the sound of his footsteps as he came closer. And closer. Until he was standing behind you.

Your head spinned as you felt his hand atop your shoulder, and he was very close to you, so close that you could feel his warmth seeping through his thin clothes. Too thin.

Lucien's hand lingered there, his thumb tracing faint circles on your skin, probably without even realizing it. You tensed under his touch, for whatever reason. You weren't his wife, you were Tamlin's wife.

Sensing it, he removed his hand, and you found yourself craving that comfort again, even if the touch was so simple, intended to be nothing more than comforting.

He took a step back, and you didn't let yourself move, or turn around to face him.

Another step back.

And another.

"Lucien," you whispered, turning around to face him. This was wrong, you knew it and yet at the moment, it felt so right. You hadn't noticed it before, his bare chest on display, hard muscles marred with scars making your pupils dilate.

Desire burned deep in your core, and now, all too aware of that damn towel, you took a step front. His own eyes had darkened, black swallowing his russet colored irises.

You repeated his name, tone dripping with need. You felt his gaze, stripping you bare as your own burned onto his exposed torso. For a few moments, it remained like that, as both of you stared at each other with heated gazes before your eyes met.

Lustful was an understatement for what you saw in his gaze. It was dark, possessive.

It didn't help in the slightest. Your thoughts screamed at you, you are Tamlin's wife, you are Tamlin's wife.

You dawned the consequences to hell as you took another step forward. Your gaze didn't falter, neither did his.

The distance between you seemed so little and yet so much. You wanted, no, needed to be closer.

"Y/n," he murmured back.

A warning.

But gods damn it, you didn't want anymore warnings!

And so, you took that final step, the desire burning as you pressed yourself closer. His warmth seeped into you and you almost moaned at the feeling itself.

The tension is the air was so thick as you leaned in closer. Lucien was as rigid as a bowstring, and oh, how you wanted him to snap.

Waiting, and waiting, you inched closer, until only a breath separated your lips. Snap, you needed him to snap, needed that confirmation to keep going. You needed him.

His fingers brushed against your waist, and at that moment, your lips were on his. Sparks exploded all over you, a wildfire flaring to life inside your chest and his hands gripped your waist through the towel.

More, more, more.

Arousal pooled between your thighs and in desperate need of some friction, you clenched them together.

Lucien's mouth was warm as his lips collided with yours, again and again, the kisses burning hotter by the second. So desperately, your lips moved against his.

You moaned as his teeth sank onto your bottom lip and ever so gently, his tongue glided over it, silently demanding permission. Eagerly, you let his tongue invade your mouth.

It was a clash, like the steel of swords in a battlefield, the pent-up desire for him scorching, and you thought that it could burn the whole world.

Tongues tangled, danced, crashed together, exploring each other. The kiss was so consuming and then you felt his hand sliding over your back, the other drifting to grip your ass.

And just like that, your hands were on his chest, feeling every inch of hard muscle and skin. Mapping out the scars, as teeth and tongues battled for dominance.

Lucien gave you the control of it, of the kiss. Something inside you drifted, for a quick moment. He gave you control, to set the pace and determine the intensity.

It felt different and yet... good.

You broke the kiss, hands braced on his chest as his one hand gripped your ass and the other had drifted off to the back of your neck, half-tangled in the locks of your silky hair.

"Y/n," his voice was rough from his own desire for you and he pulled you closer so you could feel the evidence of it, pressed against your stomach. Only your towel and his trousers separated the two of you.

And you needed more.

A tsk sounded from the doorway, and then another as Tamlin took a step closer. Turning your head to face him, his face was disappointed.

Lucien snarled, but he let his hands drop from where they were placed. As Tamlin grabbed your shoulder, shoving you harshly, you noticed he immediately regretted it.

Your lower spine slammed onto the table, a groan leaving your lips as it send waves of pain over your body.

"Let her go, Tamlin."

"Hold her still, Lucien."

They said at the same time and Tamlin pressed his lips into a thin line, eyes darkening with rage. He glanced at Lucien. "Hold her still," he commanded.

"No," Lucien's answer was immediate, and firm. Tamlin took a step back from you, heading towards Lucien and that rage swirled in you.

It distracted you from something strange, a different scent clinging to Tamlin, and that was when you noticed a faint red mark.

Not commenting on it yet, you stared as he charged towards Lucien and his fist connected with his jaw. Lucien's head snapped to the side, but he didn't react.

"I said hold her still," each word was harsher than the previous one but Lucien didn't falter. You watched and your anger simmered beneath the surface, so close to snapping. But you held back, for now.

"And I said no," Lucien replied. Tamlin's claws poked out, taking their place.

You wanted to fight for Lucien, for yourself and the women who have been treated wrong. For every single female whose severed head has tried to urge you to fight.

"I am your High Lord, Lucien. Hold. Her. Still."

"No" he snapped at Tamlin.

The rest was a blur as Tamlin's claws digged into Lucien's biceps, forcing him back against the wall. His blood rolled down as the claws tore through flesh and tendon, red rivulets running down his forearms. The blood reached his wrists and slowly dripped onto the wooden floorboards.

With each spilled drop of Lucien's blood, the rage clawed at you.

Fight, a voice whispered.

For you, another voice.

For us, then a third.

You recognized the voices, the ones in your nightmares that had you waking up in cold sweat. Were these women witches?

Yes, the first voice answered.

You hadn't paid attention to the rest of the conversation, red dusting your vision.

Lucien stared at Tamlin, until he let out a gasp.

A daggers blade was sticking out of Tamlin's abdomen. You were behind him, you had grabbed a blade and shoved it clean through his lower back and the blade had managed to emerge from the other side.

You weren't trained in combat and the sight could have made you sick, but not right now.

"You cheated," you stated, twisting the blade. Tamlin winced and you notice his holding back a scream of pain. Red blood pooled around his thin tunic.

"Did you think I haven't noticed that female's scen all over you?" Another twist of the blade. The claws retreated, Tamlin's grip on Lucien weakening.

"Did you think I haven't noticed how you were gone all night?"

"Or that red mark on your neck?"

With each question, you twisted the dagger, deeper and deeper.

And Lucien could only watch as the life drained out of Tamlin's eyes. It seemed as if those once vibrant green eyes had paled, matching the draining color of his skin, once tan now almost white.

He fought for breath, dark spots dancing in his vision.

"I am sick of your behavior, Tamlin. Remember that, even Ladies have their limits," at last, you pulled the blade out of Tamlin's stomach. His body dropped to the ground with a thud, revealing you.

The towel had managed to fall off at some point, leaving you naked in front of him. Blood covered your most private parts and it had splattered all over your face as well. But that wasn't what had surprised Lucien.

It was the magic, tendrils of magic swirled around you. Blood red flames danced around you, matching the color of the blood all over you.

A witch. You were a witch.

And you were a mad woman.

Yet Lucien only loved you more.

-------------------------☆-------------------------

a/n: I was listening to mad woman and this idea came to me, so I hope you all liked this! Not proofread because it's 3am and I need to sleep 🥲 (also I wrote this in literally an hour so please ignore anything that doesn't make much sense, thank you)

general taglist: @blessthepizzaman @amara-moonlight @homeslices @flourishandblotts-inc

comment '💕'to be added to my general taglist!

Love, Cassia ❤️

#acotar #fanfic #acotar fanfiction #a court of thorns and roses #angst #acotar angst #tamlin #tamlin acotar #toxic relationship #toxic love #lucien acotar #lucien vanserra #lucien x reader #lucien x y/n #lucien x you #tamlin x reader #smut #lucien smut #lucien vanserra smut

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juceynightmare · 1 year

Text

dating 101 (18+) part 2 - cody rhodes x reader

my masterlist

dating 101 (18+) masterlist

pairing(s): cody rhodes x reader, roman reigns x reader

warning(s): swearing, mentions of alcohol and marijuana usage

genre(s): college!au, slow burn, fluff

|| previous part || next part ||

y/n awoke to her alarm blaring across the room,. she groaned and shoved her face deeper into her pillow, waiting a few more seconds to see how much longer she could tolerate the noise. eventually though, y/n pushed herself out of her bed and mindlessly walked over to where her phone sat on her desk. orientation day. she thought to herself, reaching her arms above her head as she stretched. y/n grabbed her basket of toiletries, slipped on her slippers, and opened her door, propping it open as she always does. she nodded to cody, who had also just opened his door, and the two walked into the bathroom together.

the two had fallen into this morning routine seamlessly, finding out that they woke up around the same time everyday, and so, they had already gotten used to doing their morning routines alongside each other.

although the bathroom had four sinks, cody and y/n would always use adjacent sinks for their morning routine. it had started the day after they met, when y/n realized she had forgotten her mouthwash and cody offered for her to use his. it had only been 5 days since the ted, cody, and y/n initially met, but the trio had clicked instantly despite their different backgrounds. they balanced each other out in an odd way.

y/n brushed her teeth, staring at cody through the mirror while pulling odd faces to make him laugh as he did the same.

she remembers her hometown friends’ reactions when she sent them a selfie of her hanging out with cody and ted in her room. she thought the photo was innocent enough: y/n was in the middle smiling widely at the camera with ted and cody on either side of her, their faces pushed close together so that they were all in frame. the only thing that she would count as “scandalous” about the photo would be y/n’s flushed cheeks from drinking, and ted and cody’s obviously bloodshot eyes as they were cross-faded beyond belief.

[y/n] they’re almost as cool as you guys, i do need some more girl friends though. the testosterone is sickening everytime they start trying to out-man the other.

[indi] girl is that cody? the dude that got a girl pregnant freshman year and she got an abortion cody? the hot wrestling superstar?

[candice] do you remember when we’d only go watch men’s wrestling for him and y/n didn’t even bother to look at him or hear us out because “he literally looks like everyone else” and she never came to another wrestling event with us

[indi] and NOW she’s casually hang out with him? AND they're obviously drinking and getting high. y/n where’s our invite?

[y/n] guys PLEASEEE it took me a while to recognize him too, i just know him as wrestling superstar and have only really gotten a good look of him in the yearbook before i met him here. we’ve literally been hanging out basically 24/7 since i moved in.

[y/n] oh, and he DOES IN FACT just look like your average guy

[y/n] i still stand by that statement!! i said what i said!

[indi] and what about his physique

[y/n] he’s way more jacked than his face makes out to be

[candice] ok but does he have a kid or what

[indi] 100 bucks says he’s going to be our innocent little y/n’s first kiss

[candice] 200.

[y/n] he doesn’t have a kid and no fucking way i have standards you know!! i’ll put 300 down that he will NOT be my first kiss BUT i WILL have my first kiss this year i’m manifesting it right now, you two are witnesses.

she giggled at the memory, to which cody pointed accusingly at her through the mirror. he spit out his toothpaste, washing off his toothbrush bristles afterwards. “i won, again.” cody mused, his voice still deep with the early morning.

y/n rolled her eyes, spitting out her own toothpaste and washing off her toothbrush as cody rinsed his mouth with mouthwash. “fuck off, i wasn’t laughing at you. i was just thinking about this convo i had with my girls the other day.” she defended herself, which earned her a not-so-convincing “uh-huh” from cody.

she reached into her toiletry bag for her mouthwash that she had bought while out with cody and ted, rinsing her mouth. she spit out the mouthwash after gargling and swishing the mouthwash in her mouth. y/n used her hand to cup water and washed off her mouth. she dried off her mouth with her small washcloth

“we’re in the same group, right?” cody asked, closing up his own toiletry bag. he grabbed a hairtie and brush out of y/n’s toiletry bag and stood behind the girl. cody began to brush back y/n’s hair into a makeshift ponytail, making sure even her babyhairs weren’t in the way of her face, before tying it up. “i’m usually out with the hot girls down the hall and ted gets to spend all day with you to himself until i come back, so take this as your own special cody time for the day.” y/n remembers him musing to her about 3 days ago, when she questioned why cody was waiting up on her when he was far done with his morning routine and was just waiting for her to finish her skincare routine. and so, y/n had jokingly told him to do something useful instead of waiting for her and to her surprise, cody had taken it upon himself to tie her hair up while she got her skincare items out.

“yeah. although i don’t know if i even want to stay for the whole event. did you see how long it’s going to be? we start at 8 and the events don’t end until 6! and then there’s a football game they’re supposedly taking us to at the stadium to wrap it all up! i honestly might just skip that and come back. god knows how fast my social battery runs out when i’m with a large group of people.” y/n huffed, staring into the mirror and beginning her skincare routine.

her gaze would flicker to cody behind her, who would be playing with the girl’s hair by flicking it around. she’ll admit, the first time cody did it y/n was left with a light blush on her cheeks, but that was simply because she had never been so physically close to another human being since being friends with ted and cody. she was quick to find out that the two men were very handsy, and she means respectful handsy. when they were in a crowded street in downtown, she would feel both of their hands against her shoulders, guiding her through the crowd so they wouldn’t lose her. of course, with y/n not being used to so much skinship, would oftentimes hold on to the bottom of their shirts so they wouldn’t have to completely have her against their sides.

“maybe if you weren’t so short we wouldn’t have to walk you through a crowd.” ted would tease her, while cody would muse out “i’m telling you, we should get one of those winnie the pooh backpacks with a leash.”

“but the football game! you gotta come, it’s the first game of the season and i heard the cheerleaders are absolutely stunning.” cody whined, his morning voice fading away as he spoke more. cody stopped playing with y/n’s hair, stepping off to the girl’s side. he turned so his back was to the mirror and reached for his phone in his pocket. he put on clinton kane, knowing y/n’s favorite artist since that was all the girl would listen to in the car, and set his phone on the counter.

“exactly. the cheerleaders are absolutely stunning which means you’re going to flirt with them - or someone else in our group - and bring them back to your room. which means that ted and i will be in my room watching a movie or we’ll be with aj and paige down the hall.” y/n pointed out, nodding her head to the music. cody smiled at her comment, turning back around so he could face the mirror. he began to flex his arms, checking himself out in his reflection.

“do you think they look good?” cody asked, to which earned him a slap on the chest from y/n. he winced in pain initially, laughing off the pain afterwards. “i’ll take that as a yes!”

she rolled her eyes, quickly finishing up her morning routine just as ted walked into the bathroom. “morning teddy!” she greeted him, while cody fistbumped his roommate. ted groaned out something that sounded like a “good morning” in reply before walking into a stall and locking the door.

“come by my room later for some clif bars, i heard the dining commons are only letting people come in with their orientation group when its their group’s time for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. i don’t need you two boys whining in my ears later on about how hungry you are.” she told them, packing up her toiletry bag and shutting it.

“sir yes sir” cody saluted jokingly, which earned him a wide smile from y/n. ted had let out a “yes ms. y/n. of course, ms. y/n” from his stall and y/n and cody left the bathroom.

the two went their separate ways to go get dressed, y/n waving at cody before closing the door behind her.

there was a long day ahead of her, and y/n wasn’t sure if she would be ready for it. at least she had cody in her group, meaning she wouldn’t have to awkwardly stand there and struggle to make friends for a minute or so.

not even 20 minutes later, y/n heard knocking on her door. she finished folding up her pajamas and laid them out on her bed before walking over and unlocking her door. she opened it slightly, walking over to her desk as cody let himself in the room. he propped her door open by the magnet and whistled as he looked over y/n’s outfit. “damn sweetheart, you dressing up all for me?” he teased, walking over to y/n’s minifridge and grabbing a clif bar from the basket that was on top of it.

y/n rolled her eyes at his comment, although she felt her face warm up as a result. “never in a million years, cody. and i’ll have you know, it’s going to be insanely hot today and i don’t want to overheat” she defended herself, reaching for her lotion on her desk and squeezing some on to her hand.

she didn’t think she dressed up all that nicely, but rather she dressed appropriately for the weather that day: a simple black cargo skirt with some chains for accessories and a white and blue cropped argyle sweater vest.

she applied lotion to all parts of her skin that was showing as ted walked into the room. “who are you trying to impress y/n? you look good.” ted mused, catching one of the clif bars that cody tossed over to him. “hey codes, make sure some trash guy doesn’t try any funky business with ms. y/n here, he has to be able to do more push-ups than us if he thinks he even has a chance with her.” he continued, walking over to where cody was as he opened up his clif bar.

ted slung his arm over cody’s shoulder, the other man doing the same to him as they ate their clif bars while watching y/n put on her shoes. the two men got along better than they thought they would, and ted had made it clear to cody that he no longer cared if cody wanted to bring over girls and cody let the other know the same. after all, they had a person across the hall who would happily let them take up space in her room.

“at this point, i feel like i should be telling you two boys to watch yourselves.” y/n laughed, holding up her hand for cody to toss her one of the clif bars as well. she caught it, opened it up, and took a bite out of it. “ok i’m ready, let’s go. cody can you bring my bag?”

ted laughed and pat cody’s back as the latter whined about having to carry out y/n’s tote bag for her. “as much as i’d love to be part of y/n’s group, at least i’m not her little tote bag holder today.” he teased, following y/n out of the room.

cody slung y/n’s tote bag over his shoulder, making sure her phone, wallet, keys, and water bottle were in it before following the two out, shutting and locking the door behind them.

the three made their way out to the quad area where all the students were meeting, ted having split off early on to go find where his group was meeting. currently, y/n was holding on to the bottom of cody’s shirt, walking slightly behind him through the mess of students trying to find their orientation leaders with their large picket signs with a number. she trusted cody enough to be able to not only navigate through the crowd, but to also find the correct group.

y/n hadn’t expected cody to stop suddenly, causing her to crash into his back and let out a small yelp. cody gently took hold of her wrist and pulled her out from behind him, leaning down to whisper in her ear, “don’t worry, i don’t think anyone noticed you embarassing yourself.” he let go of her wrist, laughing as she gently nudged cody’s side.

y/n looked around, realizing that they were standing in a circle with, who she assumes, is their orientation leader in the middle. looking around the group, she counted way too many people for her liking and hoped she didn’t have to do any horrible icebreakers.

“alright it’s 8! welcome everyone to your first year at university! my name is hunter and i’ll be your orientation leader for today! so to start off, let’s begin with an icebreaker! we’ll go around in a circle saying our names, our major, and a fun fact about yourself! i’ll start.” hunter spoke out, loud enough for them to hear him amongst the chaos.

y/n couldn’t believe she jinxed herself.

|| next part ||

#cody rhodes x reader #cody rhodes #cody rhodes fanfiction #cody rhodes imagine #wwe #wwe x reader #wwe fanfic #wwe fanfiction #roman reigns x reader #roman reigns fanfiction #roman reigns fanfic

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catcas22 · 8 months

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heya, I’m a big fan of your prince of death story! I’ve made a few comments under the guest name “Myself” (probably more memorable as the guy who never shuts the fuck up about wholesome Vyke and Lansseax content, sorry about that), But then I remembered I had a Tumblr I had only used once before! If it’s okay, I have a few questions about Vyke and Lansseax’s relationship, and their history:

You’ve already explained to me in a comment reply how they met, but how did they become a couple, and who initiated it? (I’d personally imagine Lansseax, Vyke doesn’t seem like he’d be the forward type. I also imagine Lansseax made a big show of it to embarrass Vyke)

2. when all hell isn’t breaking loose, how do they normally spend time together? Or is Vyke the “brooding silent type who is begrudgingly hugged by his much taller girlfriend in public”

3. does Lansseax ever force Vyke to go flying with her? I’d imagine that would be terrifying weather or not he’s afraid of heights (although *I* am afraid of heights, so that may be a bit of a projection)

4. (Based on a funny mental image I had at one point) Being a dragon, was Lansseax ever confused about alcohol, so Vyke, humoring her, decided to take her to a bar, but then he had to deal with an absolutely trashed dragon for the next few hours?

5. despite Vyke having the personality of a homeless cat, his wife and best friend are social butterflies. Do either of them ever drag Vyke to social outings and he ends up being the guy just awkwardly standing there doing nothing?

6. Not really about Vyke and Lansseax per se, but it is by extension I guess: what’s Vykes dynamic with Fortisax? I imagine they would at they very least be friends, because in his boss fight Vyke uses Fortisax’s Lightning spear but not Lanssex’s glaive

7. how does the rest of the dragon cult view their relationship? Do people just think “lucky bastard” about Vyke, do some people think that while others think Vyke is just trying to gain favor in the cult?

8. how would Lansseax react to someone hitting on Vyke? Would she be upset or just find it funny?

9. has Vyke ever asked “would you still love me if I was a Wyrm”, )referring to the magma worm) as a joke? I definitely would, bad puns are the best type of humor

Absolutely love Prince of Death, it’s right up there with Incidence (a Deltarune story by Jungle Dragon) with being my favorite. Thank you for your time and sorry to bother you with more questions about Vyke and Lansseax XD

Hi, thanks for the ask!

Lansseax: Vyke, what was it your people call that thing you do? With the rings? Vyke: ... What? Lansseax: You know, the mammal pair-bonding ritual. Vyke: You mean marriage? Lansseax: Yes, that. Lansseax: Do you want to get married? Vyke's brain: sdfghjkjbvvvjd;ss Vyke: Sure.

In all seriousness, Vyke is a very blunt and practical guy, and Lansseax is pretty direct in going after what she wants. Once they started making a point to spend time together and realized that they wanted to continue doing so, neither of them saw any reason not to make things official.

Vyke generally doesn't get involved with Lansseax's social life. But she's constantly trying out new hobbies, and he likes hanging around and asking the occasional question while she's working on her current project. They've settled into a comfortable compromise where Lansseax doesn't try to make Vyke pretend to be social, and he finds other ways to spend quality time with her.

In this continuity, Lansseax cannot change forms at will. When she turned human, that was permanent. If she somehow turned back into a dragon, that would be permanent. Her Crucible wings allow for something closer to old-school Superman's "leap tall buildings in a single bound" than to true flight. I suppose Vyke could theoretically hold onto her while she goes springing across the rooftops, but the danger of getting dropped would be very real, and Vyke's dignity wouldn't allow for it anyway.

Lansseax actually has a pretty high tolerance for alcohol, being nearly seven feet tall. She was the one carrying Vyke home after their first time at a bar together -- he quickly learned not to try to keep up with her drinking.

Vyke is obligated to go to the occasional Cult celebration, but he never stays too long. Godwyn and Lansseax have both learned that he'll just stand in a corner if he's forced into social events -- if one wants quality time with Vyke, it's best done one-on-one.

Out of all their sister's knights, Fortissax tolerated Vyke the most. Unlike Lansseax, Forti was there for Godwyn, and didn't care for humans as a rule. But Vyke is a very dragonish human, and he's not flakey and talkative like most humans, and he didn't try to force a friendship with Fortissax (the worst possible thing one could do). They eventually warmed up to him a bit, to the point where they could sit quietly and brood together, or have the odd sparring match.

Vyke and Lansseax are an institution. Their relationship predates the Dragon Cult, and Vyke was technically the first member. The other knights see Lansseax more as a mother figure (or more rarely, an object of courtly love), and Vyke as something between a godfather and an older brother.

You know, I never considered Vyke having other suitors. But following the second war against the dragons, he would have been considered quite the catch -- the slayer of Gransax, and a close friend of Crown Prince Godwyn. He probably had a small horde of suitors chasing after him for a bit. Lansseax would have bristled at first. But Vyke is like a solitary bird of prey that mates for life and would probably just curl up and die if something ever happened to his One Person. Half the time he wouldn't even notice if someone else was flirting with him, and when he finally picked up on it he'd just be mildly bemused. Nowadays Lansseax would just find it funny.

#elden ring #answered asks #vyke the dragonspear #ancient dragon lansseax #vyke x lansseax

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ritzy-reminiscence · 1 year

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─♣️─ Lackadaisy : Melancholy Hours

⸝⸝ tl;dr : a sleepless night turns into a trip down memory lane for mordecai heller, who usually prefers to keep his memories buried deep deep down.

⸝⸝ note : this is purely self-indulgent ! so expect an unedited work, a very ooc mordecai, and a ton of headcanons that i shoehorned into the oneshot. this was made with the intention of contributing something to the lackadaisy fandom, so i do hope it's still enjoyable regardless of the shenanigans i put in . (also, to everyone in the discord that sees this, im so sorry)

It was on one of these nights when Mordecai Heller would find himself tossing and turning in bed, rustling the sheets he normally kept so pristine. Nights where his alcohol pick-ups with the Savoys lead to bone-crushing exhaustion. Nights where time seemed to slow down after fights with rival speakeasies, emphasizing the way his muscles tense and his wounds throb. Nights where the lull of cicadas and frogs outside his bedroom window gave way to thoughts and memories he normally kept under lock and key.

Memories - something that Mordecai preferred to stay away from, something that he keeps buried under layers of tough, unbreakable soil. And yet, in this warm summer night, with the moonlight filtering through the windows and the crickets chirping their trance-inducing song, Mordecai finds himself taking a reluctant walk down memory lane, lured in by some unknown entity who takes his hand in wisps of silver and gold. Who opens each door in his house of memories and grins with delight when the can of worms come crawling out from the front porch. Who reminds him, like a breeze of wind rustling his ear, that days have been better. That they have been more joyful, more vibrant than whatever he's experiencing right now.

And it was on one of these nights that ruthless gunman and rumrunner Mordecai Heller would succumb to his feelings. He'd let them flow, like salty silk ribbons, down his cheeks, his chin, releasing all that he's been bottling up in one fell swoop of tears and sobs. He'd sit up in bed and hug himself like how he used to when he was a child, and let his cries wash over him as he grieves for everything he's lost.

Viktor. Rose. Esther. Atlas, Rose, Esther, Viktor. Viktor.

Viktor, the closest thing he's had to family since he left his ; who tolerates his ramblings and rants about asymmetry and germs ; who's been a pillar Mordecai can hang on to in times where everything's too much. On nights like this, Mordecai finds himself longing for Viktor's presence. Anything could do - his gruff voice, his one-eyed glare, just ... anything to make him feel like he's back at Lackadaisy again.

Mordecai hugs himself tighter, rocking back and forth on the mattress. He shuts his eyes amidst the tears flowing from closed lids, and out from his mouth comes a thin keening. A shaky breath, a gasp for air, and then a whispered, "I want to go home."

Home, with its worn couch with the coffee stains and water rings. Home, with the clotheslines stringing from pillar to pillar, laden with drying coats and scarves. Home, with the sounds of laughter and high-pitched shrieks and sibling arguments. Rose and Esther. Rose and Esther. One shining from the inside with bubbly smiles, the other almost a carbon copy of himself with those moody eyes and those moody glasses.

"I want to go home, I want to go home," he says, over and over again, like a wish that would come true if he just said it enough. If he just believed enough.

And he wouldn't have known he had fallen asleep if it weren't for him waking up the chirps of robins and sparrows with his eyes sore and swollen. He'd stare at the ceiling in silence for a moment, before getting up and making his bed. Taking a shower. Buttoning his suit up. Locking the door behind him. On mornings after nights like these, Mordecai Heller would keep his memories under lock-and-key again as he steps out into the fast-moving world of guns, alcohol, and blood.

#୨୧ solari-writes ! ₊˚#mordecaiheller #lackadaisy #mordecaihellerfanfiction #lackadaisy fanfiction #lackadaisy cats #mordecai my bby im so sorry for ruining your character this badly #not my best work sadly #a bit too repetitive for my usual style btu #oh well i already wrote it anyways lol #so just enjoy ig :DD

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aho-dapa · 1 year

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acotar sailor moon au

So, so far, who's who?

*I decided to end up switching Cresseida and Nesta because of the vibes

The only rule here is that when the Transformation happens, they gender swap (for shenanigans) + plus Japanese terms and vague setting

Also y'all, I'm not a zodiac person, I just did this for fun, don't take it too seriously okay?? Okay???

Sailor Moon (Purple) Cancer = Rhysand

Cancer: emotional, intuitive, sometimes insecure, associated with water and the moon (misting and stuff)

bocchan, spoiled, flirtatious

Thinking of having the sailor uniform be a mix of yellow, dark blue, and switch out the red for purple. Princess Serenity transformation is similar: white hair, white clothes, but violet eyes.

Was thinking maybe (as a hc) when Princess Serenity went to the human world, she used a different identity maybe?? Maybe a name like Rhiannon??? (aka similar to how Rhys looks now with black hair)

A spoiled rich kid, went to private school until he weaseled his way into public school (with his cousin Mor) and met Cassian. Az tagged along.

Sailor Mercury (Blue) Virgo = Azriel

Virgo: humble, practical, sympathetic, water sign (blue siphon + also associated with mist)

secret bodyguard to bocchan Rhys, a smart kid, straight A student, pushes up glasses with a glint, has those thin sleek glasses, tsundere chuuni otaku, has a knife somewhere, used to clash with Cassian, very protective of Rhys, learns to open up as a friend, always takes the mission serious

fights a lot against Zoisite-Eris (as Sailor Mercury) and also has lessons with Teacher Eris (as a regular college student)

Sailor Mars (Red) Aries = Cassian

Aries: wants to prove himself, values strength, competitive, impatient, active, fire sign (red siphon)

a high school delinquent, once had a pompadour, in a biker gang for sure, made fast friends with Rhys, Azriel saw Cassian as a safety risk, now they just bicker, fought in a gang war with Mor once and they came out bros, sees Rhys as his brother (Rhys definitely calls him Aniki just because it's hilarious how quickly it goes to his head), likes attention, a bit arrogant

was thinking to originally be Mor cause red, but idk vibes??? tbh you could switch around Rei, Mako, and Minako and they would all work in some way (but I'm adding a bit of OOC since I'm character building them)

I personally think Cassian should have had a goofy prince like personality in the book (for compensating for being a 'bastard') and actually accepts that he's people's hero while also being deeply insecure about it (and that's why Eris's barbs about him would hit harder)

Sailor Jupiter (Green) Sagittarius = Mor

Sagittarius: faithful, intelligent, forceful, sympathetic, values freedom, fire sign

a ex-sukeban, got into a lot of fights with Cassian's gang, used to smoke until a pretty girl said they hated the smell, eats pocky instead, has gotten expelled a few times, bubbly, used to carry a bat around, first girlfriend was in elementary school (except she didn't know they were Dating until the Incident), also has a bike, likes partying, has the highest alcohol tolerance but is confused how she's beaten by a talking cat, teases everyone (no one is safe)

the only one to gender swap into a guy, flirts with all the women she saves, ends up coming off as a playboy, saves Nesta once and fell in love, Nesta hates her flirty attitude as Sailor Jupiter but slowly becomes friends with Mor because Clare suddenly starts hanging out with Mor

Clare ends up finding out her identity and it causes Problems

Sailor Venus (Orange) Libra = Lucien

Libra: extroverted, friendly, has always wanted peace (with family, with life choices), honest, blunt, persuasive, charming, charismatic

grew up in a strict home with Eris, the problem child, seemingly very open with people but can close up if he's insecure, had a close relationship with Eris until Beron strained their relationship, was a solo Sailor Senshi with Varian (cat form) until joining everyone, has angst with fighting against Zoisite Eris

Tuxedo Mask (Leo) = Tamlin

Leo: compassionate, big-hearted, natural leadership, self-assured, fire sign

This guy has three outfit ideas: Civilian Mamoru - wears a dark green suit like in the anime, thinks he's cool but is not, is cool when he's not trying to be, has chin length hair with those round spiral glasses, goes from Clark Kent to Superman basically, instantly clashes with Rhys / Tuxedo Mask - the traditional black tuxedo, roses, roses everywhere, has a mask too, this time his hair is tied back and grows out to his shoulders (because anime logic), Sailor Moon Rhys and Tuxedo Mask Tam have a very obvious Thing going on / Endymion - the completely white outfit, this time his hair gets extra long because it's his Final Form but it's not tied, flows in the wind very majestically (Pantene commercial esque, very angst)

Zoisite = Eris

the vibes mostly (the hair)

but fun stuff is that Zoisite was with Kunzite in the 90s anime but was hinted in the manga to be with Sailor Mercury (not really but)

Kunzite was originally Nesta but now it's Cresseida, so ship vibes?? But the only ship that's set is tamsand rn (and tarlain)

Started working with Queen Beryl (Amarantha) because she promised to punish his father (something Eris didn't have the power to do without causing a lot of trouble)

Also works as a teacher sometimes now that his father is out of commission

Jadeite = Feyre

pretty boy, grey eyes

but was recruited by Amarantha to save their father's life (who's human), contrasted with Cassian, once Feyre 'dies' and was forced to give up the power Amarantha gave her, she meshes really well with the gang

Nephrite = Nesta

the first picture gives me Nesta vibes

has a romance arc with Naru Clare because I'm personally sweet on Nesta/Clare, but angst because Clare doesn't know Nephrite is Nesta, is trying her best to save their father (currently held hostage by Amarantha)

Was originally Cresseida to opposite Mor but I changed my mind (my intuition said so)

Kunzite = Cresseida

I was convinced by the white hair and cresseris possibility but

she's forcibly recruited by Amarantha unlike the others that 'willingly' work for her, but eventually defects with the help of Tarquin after she finds out about his other identity

Sailor Pluto (Scorpio) = Jurian

for laughs mostly

but also because I needed a milf/dilf in here fr

and Jurian in canon also finds himself out of time from being an eye

Sailor Uranus (Aquarius) = Elain

trans Elain agenda always

watches over her father while her sisters are being evil, ends up getting recruited by Varian to save them

Sailor Neptune (Pisces) = Tarquin

sea vibes (my sign, so best)

uhhh has cute moments with Elain

Sailor Saturn (Capricorn) = Emerie

literally the last one, and we need more Emerie content

(based off their hair color)

Luna (Black Hair) = Amren

Artemis (White Hair) = Varian

Naru = Clare

Queen Beryl = Amarantha

#i did this while listening to Moonlight Densetsu #fun times fr #gonna be honest #so much is based on vibes and color schemes #are general vibes #I have funny situations in my head #acotar sailor moon au #as a genderfluid person #this whole hc is my darling #but also #yuri yaoi and yaoi yuri vibes aplenty #lots of ships #all the ships #nvm everyone is in a polycule #acotar #tamsand #tarlain

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addictedtostorytelling · 29 days

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Random question from a curious anonymous.

I remembered a fan fiction that I read a while ago but I don't remember the name, the plot was this, Grissom and Sara have sex after being forced to have some drinks at a lunch with the sheriff and part of the team, after that Grissom wakes up first and flees from Sara's house and tries to act as if nothing happened making everything even more uncomfortable between them. My question is, do you think it would be possible that canonically speaking Grissom and Sara would have had a night of sex, drunk but night of sex at last if the opportunity was given?

What consequences do you think this disaster could have for them if it had been real? Apart from knowing for sure what the other looks like being naked and no longer having to fantasize about it

hi, curious anon!

so up front, i want to stress: i have never read the fic in question, so i cannot comment on any of its specifics or how well this writer executes the story idea you described. my intention with this answer certainly isn’t to harsh on anyone or their idea. it is only to give my take on the question: “based on their canon characterizations, is it plausible grissom and sara would have sex for the first time when they were drunk?”

and i tend to think that particular hypothetical is not very plausible at all.

more discussion after the "keep reading," if you're interested.

the whole thing about grissom and sara is that during the early seasons of the show before they get together, they both have so many hang-ups.

i mean, even their hang-ups have hang-ups.

that so, i don't believe it would be in character for either one of them (let alone for both of them together) to toss all of those hang-ups aside in pursuit of some momentary drunken gratification—and especially not considering such a liaison might not ultimately prove entirely gratifying for them anyhow, just given how they both might feel about it afterward.

for one thing, i don’t think grissom gets drunk very often in general, let alone in the company of others, let alone when work subordinates (including and especially sara) are present.

baby boy is a control freak who likes to keep his wits about him—and always be ready for a callout—so getting sloshed to the point where he would lose all of his inhibitions, throw caution to the wind, and jump into bed with sara just isn’t really his mo.

aside from occasionally having a brandy with brass in his office or a cocktail with catherine at his condo after a particularly rough case, he isn’t a social drinker—i mean he’s not a particularly social person period—and he’s definitely not the type of go out to bars or nightclubs or overindulge at parties.

based on warrick’s comments to sara in episode 01x20 “sounds of silence,” we know none of the younger csis has any idea what his drink of choice is or has ever been out to a bar with him.

from everything we see in canon, when he drinks, it tends to be in private, one-on-one settings, and he tends to drink in moderation. he absolutely won’t drink on the clock (see episode 05x08 “ch-ch-changes”) and also seems averse to drinking at times when he knows he might be called in to work (such as we see from his reaction to learning catherine was at a bar in episode 05x22 “weeping willows”).

canonical evidence further suggests he is reserved in his alcohol consumption at home, as per that scene in episode 02x15 “burden of proof” where he and catherine are mixing vodka screwdrivers after shift in his condo; while she already seems a bit tipsy (to the point she’s lost her filter and is saying some pretty brazen things re: grissom and sara’s dynamic), he still seems more or less sober, either suggesting he hasn’t had as much to drink as she has and/or his alcohol tolerance is fairly high.

—all of which is to say, i think there would probably seldom if ever be a situation where (prior to their getting together) he would even be in a position to get drunk around sara.

while they might find themselves dining together during the course of an investigation (as sara mentions they sometimes do during episode 02x15 “burden of proof”), as long as they were both on the clock or either one of them were on call or had an upcoming shift, he likely wouldn’t order booze at all, and certainly he wouldn’t overindulge.

likewise, outside of grabbing an on-the-go shared meal in the midst of a case, it's not like he would ever (prior to when they were dating) go out with sara one-on-one outside of their working hours—so it’s not like he would ever really be around her at a time or in a private, non-work setting where he’d feel at liberty to cut loose and drink a lot.

he likewise probably wouldn’t allow himself to get truly inebriated in any kind of group setting, either, and particularly not if his junior team members were anywhere around—and even if by some accident he did get drunk at a team party or something, he would be so paranoid about saying or doing something revealing in sara’s presence i've got to believe he’d avoid her as much as possible and especially not allow himself to end up alone with her at the end of the event, sans any kind of “chaperones.”

indeed, given grissom’s hang-ups during the early seasons regarding how his relationship with sara might potentially negatively affect his career, plus his fear of rejection from her, both of which are primary motivations for him keeping his distance from her, despite his feelings for her otherwise, i tend to believe he would likely be hypervigilant about not losing control of himself in her presence, as he would be terrified of the possible consequences.

either with other potential witnesses present or in a scenario where he and sara were alone together, he would be extremely averse to “letting go” too much, in the first case because he would fear judgment from onlookers, in the second because he would fear any forward behavior from him might cause sara to recoil.

he knows he already has a hard enough time as is holding back from demonstrating to her how he really feels even when sober, and he wouldn’t want to make that particular battle any harder on himself by getting drunk around her, and especially not under circumstances where the potential for him to embarrass himself would be high.

that so, i tend to believe even were he to find himself in a situation where drinking were happening and sara were present, he’d decline to have more than one or two drinks tops over the course of the encounter. instead, he would make excuses as necessary. end up as the “last man standing,” even if everyone else involved went over the limit. play the role of the designated driver, if needs be.

meanwhile, with sara, most of the time, i don’t think she would be likely to ever get drunk while attending work functions or even on social occasions involving her coworkers (and especially grissom), either. for as much as she is sometimes accused of being completely impolitic, the truth is she not entirely oblivious to how she is perceived, and she knows it’s best professional practice not to get completely wasted at office parties or just around coworkers in general.

though she might be more likely than grissom to cut loose a bit and have a couple beers while out with her coworkers—while he wouldn’t even go to the club, she would, if invited—she also wouldn’t want to embarrass herself (and particularly not as she is conscious of her status as a junior staff member and a relatively young woman in the department).

the only time where the above might not hold true would potentially be during s4, when sara does display some problematic behaviors re: her alcohol consumption.

however, even then, i still somewhat doubt she would ever allow herself to be in the position of getting totally hammered around grissom.

see, the truly dangerous aspect of her consumption habits during the period while she is abusing alcohol is that she is so secretive about them.

for the most part, she tends to save most of her drinking for when she is at home alone rather than in social settings, and on the rarer occasions when she does go out to bars with friends, she doesn’t tend to get fall-down drunk in public with them. instead, as we see in episode 04x23 “bloodlines,” she drinks in relative moderation while her friends are around, waiting until they quit her company to then step over the line. she also habitually conceals the aftereffects of her heavier drinking by popping cough drops and feigning like her hangover symptoms are the product of a cold (see episode 04x15 “early rollout”).

the sara of s4 is not the stereotypical “drunk party girl.”

rather, she is a girl who drinks her sorrows when she is alone and lonely and then lies about it later when she has to go in to work.

it's also questionable how drunk she tends to get, even when she is alone.

as we see in episode 04x15 "early rollout," the threat of being called in to work early is always with her, and she has got to be conscious of it if she doesn't want to be "found out." so while she does get drunk or buzzed between shifts, i somewhat doubt she regularly allows herself to get blackout drunk; not when the alcohol elimination cycle for that kind of intense binge could take thirteen to fifteen hours, and not when she might still be visibly inebriated or conspicuously hungover by the time she needed to be back at the lab or on scene.

so.

given these patterns of behavior from her, i don’t believe she would ever be likely to get shitfaced to the point of losing all her inhibitions around grissom, even during her nadir during s4. she wouldn't likely come in to work seriously drunk or get drunk at work. and if she were ever to find herself in proximity to him while social drinking was happening off the clock, she would be careful to pace herself, not only because she wouldn’t want to say or do anything embarrassing in his presence on a personal level but also because he’s her boss and she wouldn’t want him to get wise to her more problematic habits, lest he start to question her fitness for doing her job.

to my mind, it’s fairly telling that grissom doesn’t seem to have any idea about sara’s problem drinking behaviors in s4 until they come to a head in episode 04x23 “bloodlines.” while brass clocks her fairly early on, she successfully conceals the issue from grissom, even given how much attention he typically pays to her. to me, the fact that she is able to keep him none the wiser suggests she is very careful and deliberate in how she comports herself in his presence where alcohol might potentially be involved. she doesn’t want him to even get a sniff of what’s going on with her.

the way i see things, even during this time when sara’s behavior is verging on reckless, she would be much more likely to get drunk around every other member of the team before she would be to do the same around grissom.

as we see at various points in the show’s early seasons, she will drink in the company of other, non-grissom team members (see episodes 03x17 “crash and burn” and 04x23 “bloodlines”).

and for as much as she would try to avoid being drunk around grissom if she could, she would probably find it fairly easy to do so.

as discussed above, outside of her potentially showing up to work drunk (which is something she isn’t going to do), she also wouldn't likely come by many opportunities to be actually be drunk in grissom’s presence outside of work prior to when they get together, either, just based on his behavior in conjunction with hers.

catherine, nick, warrick, and greg might occasionally head to the bar with her, but grissom won’t join in the party when they do.

moreover, it’s not like prior to when they start dating sara can convince grissom to spend one-on-one time with her outside of work, either. for as much as she might fantasize about them going out to dinner, splitting a bottle of wine or two, and “seeing what happens,” he is very conscientious about avoiding that exact scenario, knowing both what a temptation and what a risk doing so might prove to him (see episode 03x22 “play with fire”).

as i talk about here:

it’s worth noting that what she’s asking for isn’t just a shared meal between colleagues. those types of low-key engagements, grissom is fine with, as is proven by his willingness to occasionally join the team for breakfast at the diner (see episode 01x23 “strip strangler”) or even to at times to have catherine over to his place for drinks following a rough shift (see episode 02x15 “burden of proof”). later on in the series, he’ll occasionally meet up with brass and catherine at restaurants (see episode 05x15 “king baby”) and invite sofia out for a meal to discuss her future at the crime lab (see episode 05x14 “unbearable”)—no big. social calls such as these ones don’t rile him, even when they place him in one-on-one situations with beautiful women, like catherine and sofia, for the simple reason that there are no real stakes—because they are just meetups between coworkers, with no expectations attached to them (see here). but though grissom has shared many meals with sara in the past (see episode 02x15 “burden of proof”), what sara proposes to grissom here isn’t just another informal sit-down between two members of the same team. she is asking grissom for something personal; for something romantic; for what they’ve both been denying themselves of ever since she moved to vegas. —and the fact that she is scares the hell out of grissom. maybe if what they weren’t already in love with each other, her invitation would be one thing. but the fact that he is already in so deep with her—that, as he says in the original version of his monologue in episode 04x12 “butterflied,” he fantasizes about being with her and making love to her and sharing his life with her all of the time (see here)—raises the stakes considerably. what she has proposed isn’t just a “hey, i think you’re cute and you think i’m cute, so let’s see if there’s anything here to be had” type of thing. it’s the type of thing that’s going to change their lives forever if they do it. when she senses how fearful grissom is, sara tries to downplay the gravity of what she’s offering (“why not? let’s—let’s have dinner. let’s see what happens”), but grissom already knows: if he goes out with her once, he’ll want to go out with her again; he’ll want to date her; he’ll want to have a real relationship; he’ll want to marry her; he’ll end up risking his career and the stability of his life; he’ll turn everything upside-down for her sake; he’ll hand over his heart to her, completely, irrevocably—

so between sara's desire not to overindulge in front of grissom and his not to overindulge in front of her, it’s doubtful sara would ever find herself in a position where she and grissom were even alone together and tipsy, let alone drunk enough to break all of their unspoken rules and fuck.

—and especially not because i don’t think in their hearts of hearts either one of them would want their first time to be that way.

for one thing, grissom is such a gentleman, i don’t think he would have it in him to “take advantage” of sara when she was drunk—even if she were the one who initiated the sexual encounter and/or stated she wanted it. he’d want the consent to be clearly and freely given, not muddled by alcohol.

and especially given he is her boss.

for another thing, he'd also want her to know he was not in bed with her on some drunken whim but because he absolutely wanted to be. he’d rather die than give her the impression she was his drunken mistake.

remember: for him, sex is about forming connections and expressing love, not just seeking physical pleasure (see episode 07x21 “ending happy”).

for yet another thing, grissom is an insecure creature, especially where sexual relationships are concerned. that so, he would be afraid of having his first time with sara be in circumstances where he couldn’t be 100% assured the meaning of what they were doing was clear to both of them.

prior to when they get together, there is always a part of him that worries sara will only want him until she has him, and then once she has him, her interest in him will evaporate, because then she’ll have seen all of his flaws and failing points up close. given that fear, it would be very important for him that their first time be one he could be sure she had come into with “both eyes open,” so that if—as he hoped—it resulted in the commencement of a real and committed relationship between them, he could feel confident she knew what she was getting into with him, with nothing of the experience lost or misremembered “by light of day.”

and i know, i know: alcohol depresses the cerebral cortex, i.e., the part of the brain which controls judgement, which can weaken a person’s self-control, lower their inhibitions, and cause them to behave drunk in ways they never would while sober.

i mean, that’s part of the danger of drinking to excess.

but as stated above, i don’t suppose grissom would ever really let himself get totally shitfaced drunk around sara to begin with.

and i have to believe he would have to be “totally shitfaced drunk” to drop those particular cares and inhibitions.

one or two beers past sober wouldn’t be enough to make him do so.

only in an extremity of drunkenness would he ever forget himself so fully.

—which is just as well, because i also don’t think sara would be on board with drunk sex for their first time, either.

baby girl is the daughter of alcoholics and probably has some compunctions re: fucking while blotto.

for as much as she does indulge in problem drinking behaviors during s4, she is always careful not to allow herself to completely follow in her parents’ footsteps and become a full-blown alcoholic; she is always in a position where she can actually stop drinking when she wants to (as we see from the fact that she does seemingly stop cold turkey once grissom confronts her in episode 05x13 “nesting dolls”).

without being able to say so for certain—all i can do is vaguely handwave in the direction of what she says to grissom about her drinking in episodes 05x02 “down the drain” and 05x13 “nesting dolls”—i tend to think she has drawn some personal “lines in the sand” with regards to stuff she won’t allow herself to do where alcohol is involved. and, again, without being able to prove as much, i think some of those lines have to do with having sex while drunk.

knowing the dangers, she doesn’t want to be bringing home guys—even if the guy in question is grissom—at times when she isn’t in control of her faculties.

that's just one reason among infinite reasons i think episode 13x15 “forget me not” is such fucking dogshit for sara, characterization-wise: in what universe would the girl who investigates dozens of brutal rape and murder cases with single, female victims a year allow herself to go into some random guy’s hotel bedroom while she was seriously drunk, knowing none of her friends or family has any idea where she is at the time? i mean, even if you make the argument she is behaving recklessly due to her heartbreak over grissom, that behavior doesn’t fit her usual patterns for recklessness. she typically engages in reckless behavior within view of her support network, carrying the subconscious hope they’ll notice she is struggling and do something to intervene, proving their care for her. she's not actually ever looking to get herself killed; rather, she wants to be rescued. she also tends to more often than not put herself into dangerous situations where she considers there is some “purpose,” like securing evidence in a case or confronting a suspect so they can’t flee a scene. she is willing to “sacrifice herself” if she supposes her doing so might serve the greater good; the idea of martyrdom does somewhat appeal to her. but the same can't be said for needless loss. she doesn't want to die some stupid, pointless death or suffer for no reason. she doesn't typically act out sans an audience. so putting herself in a very vulnerable position with a man she doesn’t at all know, far out of view of anyone who might care enough to try to stop her, where her rape or death would serve nothing and no one, isn’t the way she rolls. that's not her brand of poison.

—and especially not in a situation where both she and grissom were bombed, because then she would have to worry about grissom’s motivations for sleeping with her and wonder going forward if he would ever have chosen to have sex with her had he been in his right mind.

and honestly? i can even see her being so preoccupied by the looming threat of “beer goggles” in the moment that she wouldn’t be able to enjoy herself and might even call things off before they got too hot and heavy to begin with because she was terrified about potentially “plying him” into doing something he might later come to regret.

having held off from being together for so long, i do imagine when grissom and sara finally cross that final boundary between them and become a couple, it is very much a situation where the floodgates burst and they get caught up in a torrent of passion.

however, i just can’t imagine that moment would be one that would likely include alcohol.

not only would they just never be drunk enough around each other in a one-on-one situation to “go there,” but even if by some stretch of the imagination they were both shitfaced and alone together, i think both of them would be reluctant to let things happen that way.

they’d both have some major reservations, and one or both of them would call things off (however inelegantly).

so.

all of the above is to say, i honestly cannot imagine, given my understanding of the characters, a scenario in which grissom and sara as we know them in canon would ever have sex for the first time while drunk (at least during the era when she is his employee in vegas).

the whole idea doesn’t work for me, either logistically or in terms of their probable behavior.

as for the second part of your question, ignoring all that i've said above, if somehow grissom and sara did have sex for the first time while drunk and then grissom fled sara’s apartment and tried to act as if nothing had happened between them going forward—

frankly, i shudder to think what might happen.

sara would be absolutely devasted—humiliated, heartbroken, confused, and hurt, overwhelmed by her sense of rejection. in all likelihood, she would quit her job, and not in the way where she talked to anyone about her intentions beforehand. she would just leave her letter of resignation in grissom’s box and then be gone, and she would probably move across state lines and change her phone number before he even had the opportunity to recognize the fact she was no longer working for him.

having the love of her life—the one person who had ever even given a damn about her, or so she’d thought—seemingly decide he didn’t want her after having slept with her once would do astronomical numbers on that girl.

she'd probably drink a lot.

make really, really reckless decisions.

like i said, i hate to even think.

and even if grissom realized how badly he had fucked up after the fact and somehow hunted her down and tried to explain himself, i don’t know that she could ever trust him again—or at least not without him putting in a fuckton of work to prove to her he truly wanted to be with her after all.

he would have to pull out some mr. darcy to the tenth power-levels of contrite, genuine, romantic apology and show her through his actions he was devoted to her and desired nothing more than to be with her, despite his previous behavior. and if and when they finally had sex again, he would have to make damn sure he didn’t go running off immediately afterward. he'd have to be completely transparent about his love for and commitment to her.

—but that’s only if he were able to find her and make amends before something awful happened.

and he might not get that chance.

not given how badly he hurt her.

i can only imagine his motivation for bolting and keeping his distance would be that he feared he had somehow done something unforgivable by coming onto her (drunk) in the first place and he didn’t want her to feel coerced. i can only hope if such were the case—and he weren’t just avoiding her out of cowardice—he would realize the error in his perception of the situation sooner rather than later and get his act together in time enough to actually undo the damage he had done.

anyway, suffice it to say, i don’t imagine for one moment that when grissom and sara get together in canon, they do so under the influence of alcohol.

but that’s just my view, and other people’s mileage may vary.

thanks for the question! please feel welcome to send another any time.

#answered #anon #asks: csi #**#my meta #meta: csi #meta: gsr #hypothetical scenario #let's talk shop #csiverse

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yfmconfessions2 · 7 months

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THE ANON PUFF is back with more shit!!! This time with other band members too!

-Puff devours whole chocolate bars like theyre small candies and then is suprised that hes nauseous afterwards

-Puff gets cold SO EASILY its crazy, he hates taking cold showers

-If you ask Puff to give you anything (for example some water) he will say "no" then immediately get up and get you the thing you asked for bc he thinks its hilarious

-Benatar doesnt go to clubs as much as the other band members, so when theyre out he has self care nights and then takes care of 3 drunk asses when they get back to the bus.

- Puff doesnt have high alcohol tolerance. Like he takes two shots and is already saying the most fucked up, slurred stuff you can imagine.

-They got canceled on twitter multiple times for saying slurs (besides Benatar)

-Talking about getting canceled, Benatar makes sure they dont start fights out of nowhere with random people on any social medias

-Deejay has the best immune system out of the whole band. Like everyone can be sick in their beds and he's just taking care of them like a mama.

-Axel hangs out with Shitty G every chance he gets bc he reminds him of his dad with the way he speaks and stuff

-They all have been to jail at least once.

-Puff had shitty grades even though he could have had at least decent ones, he was just too lazy to study.

-Deejay and Benatar do most of the work for the band (editing and stuff) but once in a full moon, Puff helps out and if he DOES, he literally pulls 4 all nighters in a row to get all of it done.

-Benatar bought all of the band members squishmallows for the 1 year anniversary of their band and they all matched. Puff and Axel said it was dumb as hell, but they sleep with them till this day. Deejay liked it from the beginning.

-Puff once made slimes as a kid, spilled the glue he was using all over his grandmas carpet and literally threw the carper out and said that someone stole it.

-Puff loves building legos, his room at his grandmas house is filled with legos.

-Puff uses the shittiest cologne in the world and says that he smells great.

-They have no shame. Like when theyre in public they can have a contest who will scream the most foul things imaginable and then when everyone stares at them they all just giggle their asses off.

ANDDD THATS ALL!

OMOMGOMGOMGOMG PUFF ANON YAYYYAYAYA

THE SECOND ONE IS SO ME

DEEJAY IS 100% THE MOM FRIEND I GUARANFUCKINGTEE

BENATAR LOVES SQUISHMALLOWS I KNOW IT RAY TOLD ME HE TOLD ME

ONE TIME WHEN PUFF WAS A KID, HIS GRANDMA GAVE HIM THE WHOLE BAG OF CHIPS AND TOLD HIM NOT TO EAT THEM ALL, AND PUFF ACCIDENTALLY ATE THEM ALL. HIS EXCUSE WAS "A RAT. A GIANT RAT BURST THROUGH THE DOOR, SLAPPED THE BAG OUT OF MY HAND, ATE ALL THE CHIPS, AND ESCAPED OUT THE WINDOW. ...and also stole an extra cookie on the way out."

#yfm #your favorite martian #confession

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countlessrealities · 9 months

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New Year's Eve toasts || No longer accepting.

@technodromes sent: 🥂💋 for a toast with a kiss (Bishop & SR)

After what happened at the Christmas party, inviting Bishop over for New Year's Eve seemed the obvious, right thing to do. The last thing Rick wants is for the Utrom to think that he is avoiding him. The idea has crossed his mind, but he has quickly discarded it. Dating and everything connected to it might not be his field of expertise, but he refuses to lose a good friend over something as stupid as a crush.

Not to mention that AR would have made fun of him till the end of time if he had taken the coward's way out and his best friend already has a too long list of things he can use against him.

What leaves him a little on edge is that they haven't talked about what has passed between them, about the kiss, and about what it means yet. Rick would like to say that he doesn't mind, since there's plenty of time for them to do it, but not knowing still leaves him unable to figure out how he is supposed to act. And it's starting to drive him crazy.

That little New Year's gathering had, once again, been AR's idea. The black market dealer had wanted to drag him to yet another crazy party, but this time Rick has been adamant in his refusal. So, they have compromised by choosing to spend New Year's Eve at a small pub they both hang out at from time to time. The place is offering a decent meal and live music, so something pleasant but not too wild.

All in all, the night had gone well, even if SR has ended up wishing he had made his best friend promise to behave. Maybe, that way, the idiot wouldn't have spent the whole meal poking fun at the rest of the presents, Bishop included.

So when midnight approaches and AR decides to go and join the band that's currently playing, Rick doesn't feel guilty in the least for the relief that washes over him. He loves his best friend, he really does, but at times he is just too much.

"I-I'm sorry about him, I-I swear that he isn't always like that," he hurries to tell Bishop the moment they are left alone. "H-He is a bit of an acquired taste, b-but...he's worth it, once you get to know him."

There's much more than he could say on the matter, about the sides that his best friend hides behind his reckless troublemaker facade, but there's no time left for it. Before he can even get started, the crowd around them cheers and start chanting the countdown.

The guard's eyes go wide and he hurries to fill both their glasses, so that they can have their toast. A nervous smile opens on his lips as he forces himself to keep his eyes on his friend as the seconds tick away towards the climax of the night.

The sound of their glasses clinking against each other is swallowed by the yells of the patrons and by the music starting up again. Rick, however, pays no mind to it and, instead, he downs his drink as fast as he can, not to lose the momentum. His tolerance for alcohol is too high for the wine to truly affect his inhibitions, but he is putting his faith in the placebo effect.

His lips part, as if he wanted to say something, but he quickly changes his mind and instead dives down in a rush. It's a miracle that he doesn't end up headbutting poor Bishop instead of kissing him, but somehow he manages to fit their mouths together without any painful accident.

The kiss is quicker than the one they have exchanged on Christmas, a bit more hesitant too, but it also holds a stronger hint of longing. It's not really conveying a statement or a question, but more of a hope.

When he moves away, the guard's face feels hot and the look on his face betrays every bit of the nervousness he is struggling with.

"Uh, s-so, that was...I mean! H-Happy New Year, my friend."

#[ ic :: s314 Rick ]#&& Bishop #[ relationship :: SR & Bishop ]#technodromes #[[ they already kissed at Christmas but ]]#[[ SR is still nervous about it omg xD ]]#[[ he's such a dork xD ]]

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godsandtorrance · 2 years

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Loneliness

One of the main things in my life that I struggle with, and that I don't think gets talked about enough, is loneliness.

I'm at the ripe age of 23. I'm at the prime-time where friendships, particularly female friendships, should be the highlight of my life right now. I should be going out drinking (or a different meet-up activity, as I don't actually drink or like risking going out at night in this currant climate), sending memes and inside jokes to the group chat, checking in on a group of women my own age who do the same for me.

But I don't. I have a best friend, but due being busy and other life issues, we don't talk like we used to. Aside from her, there really is no other friend. My colleagues are all older than me, at a completely different life stage, and the only colleague my own age has her own friends who appear to not match my own lifestyle.

I used to have a friend group - five or so girls in my teen years who I went to school with. We would hang out all the time, message each other constantly - not necessarily relatable to adults but still a nice little social and fun group I could rely on.

Naturally, we grew apart as we got older. They changed and went out partying, while I, at the time, was isolated due to my mental health troubles, and I don't like alcohol (as established). Unfortunately, in hindsight I realised it wasn't really a good group of friends. I was very weird (annoyingly so, but I refuse to even entertain the thoughts of my irritating, not-self-aware younger self), and it was obvious, looking back, that they mostly tolerated me, and often left me out of things.

It was also, considering we were a group of hormonal teens, pretty toxic at times too, but I'm happy to say I, at least, have grown up a lot since then and can put that kind of behaviour behind me.

University was a struggle too. As a highly socially anxious young adult, following my stressful few years of intense mental health issues, I really found it difficult to open up to people. In lessons, I'd remain as quiet as possible; I didn't start conversations or join in; I tried a few societies but they just weren't the right fit for me - or maybe I didn't give them enough of a chance.

It took lockdown, a time for reflection for myself and my personal struggles, to see that I was lonely and I wasn't helping myself. I didn't try enough to join in and make the effort - and I couldn't expect other people to always do so first, especially if I gave off the blank-faced, unapproachable (but secretly fearful of looking stupid) vibe.

When I went to university again for my masters degree, I made far more of an effort - I chatted and instigated conversation, said yes to certain meet-ups and really pushed myself to being open and friendly. It didn't get too far, as many in the year-long course had their own friends, and I wasn't entirely perfect at being the right social person, but I knew I could do it. Practice, after all, makes perfect.

Now that I've started work, and I'm steadily trying to figure out what the hell I want to do with my life (more on that another time), I'm gradually trying to let myself be open to any opportunities, conversation, anything.

But it's hard. Seeing people on social media in their tight-knit groups makes me feel like I'm the problem. It feels like I'm the only person in the world incapable of - and undeserving - of friendships. As much as I know social media is a facade at times, there's no denying that there are truly beautiful friendships out there.

However, I use this as something to hold on to, and something to hope for. Knowing that great friendships exist is wonderful, and it's special to know that when the right time comes along, I will meet the right people I click with. I wouldn't want to force any kind of connection, as in my experience trying too hard doesn't work and it's just emotionally exhausting.

Without trying to sound ridiculously over-positive (I can't stand the high-key promotions of being 'happy happy happy!' that saturate social media, it's just not possible to be as joyful as a Cbeebies programme all the time), there is a blessing to having minimal friends. I get to work on the most important friendships I have - the one with myself.

Disgustingly saccharine, I know, but I've spent the past few years working on my mental health issues and actually working through CBT, getting two degrees and simply enjoying the small things. I love being creative, I adore films, I'm a huge reader. The introvert in me gets to enjoy the comfort of staying in and working on my private hobbies.

Of course I want to branch out still - there's such a thing as getting too comfortable in solitude, especially as someone who clearly still misses frequent socialising - but in the meantime I can focus on myself and the activities that bring me joy.

Early twenties are complicated, and I'm still trying to figure out what the hell I'm going to do. I don't see myself sticking to this job forever, or putting down roots in my home for too long, so I need this quiet time to work it out, find the right career for me and just let things progress naturally.

It's time I start being kinder to myself, and I'm not going to get that self-respect, self-esteem or self-love from other people. Tying my worth into other people - whether they're in my life as my friends or not - only ends badly, as I've learnt before.

Loneliness doesn't mean failure, or that I suck as a person, or that this is going to be my future. It just means my life is a little bit more quiet right now, and I have all this time to look after myself.

If you're like me, feeling completely isolated in your loneliness like you're the only young adult struggling, you're definitely not alone. It's rarely talked about, but that doesn't mean other lacking-in-friends people aren't out there. We're just don't shout about it, and we're probably socially awkward introverts too.

#Loneliness #Blog #Writing blog #Early twenties #Alone #No friends #Thoughts #Musings #My picture #Godsandtorrance #British #Uk #Friendship #Female friendships

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drainbangle · 2 years

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hiiii okay so. i know more about some of them than others but i don’t know anything about malaya so i’d love to hear about her!

oc post

As I mentioned in the team's overview, she's a non-combatant, but she tends to take care of what are pretty much the like... behind-the-scenes work that actually keep the team afloat in terms of like, budgeting, networking, and procuring supplies...?

Within the (core) team, she tends to hang out with Elyo and Ayasa the most due to how their roles line up; Elyo, because he's the team's tactician, and Ayasa since she's the team's main medic— along with both jobs kind of necessitating budget coordination.

She'd also be responsible for procuring the team's weapon and outfit upgrades (except for Elyo in the latter, he makes all of his main outfits himself) so she'd have a surprisingly sharp eye for like, aesthetics and stuff.

She's certainly very determined, sharp-witted (especially about social/historical info i think?), and cares for her team a lot. She's also very O__O when Some people get irresponsible specifically bc it makes her job a lot harder lol

As of right now she has the least plot + backstory developed, so I need to get working on that OTL.

Malaya also doesn't have like, super detailed combat training but carries a dagger out in the open because shit's dire when you're a jrpg character tbh.

Also as a fun fact: she has bar none the highest alcohol tolerance amongst the team. The closest contender to that is Oszkár, but that's because he deliberately built up a high tolerance to get information at formal events and such. He paces himself, but Malaya by contrast could just like. Keep chugging I think

#malaya #oc tag #telegram #alcohol mention

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blochnessm0nstr · 2 years

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Way too much info about me!! (Warning, word vomit)

My stats:

Height: 5’7

Sw: 184 lbs

Cw: 156 lbs

Lw: 151 lbs

Gw: 96 lbs

I’ve been bulimic since March but last night i binged and could barely purge, scared me right back into ana. I was ana for about a year before that though.

It’s currently 8 AM and i haven’t slept, but i don’t wanna sleep through christmas eve so i’m too scared to go to sleep now, oh well I’ll pull another all nighter

Kind of? addicted to getting high on benadryl which is really stupid but yknow. Trying to stop because last time i dosed i had 35 (875mg) and barely hallucinated at all and if i dose again i’ll probably want at least a gram which scares me, don’t want seizures. Was alcoholic when i was 14 but passed out behind a closed down bush’s chicken (blood alcohol level was 0.27) and had to go to the hospital, haven’t really drank since. Been hospitalized once for benadryl as well, took 35 before my tolerance was very high (like it is now) and was speaking gibberish and my mom found me :/ went to the psych ward after that one.

Been to 3 psych wards in the span of 2 months for various reasons, was diagnosed w a lot but i don’t trust them because they diagnosed me w BPD even though i’m only 15? Off all my meds too because fuck em.

Dad recently shot up my house then killed himself so that’s fun. Happened 8? days ago i think. He had a little psychotic break. He had pretty bad bipolar disorder so honestly he wasn’t really acting out of character.

Obsessed w butterflies and ready to make it my whole personality. The color purple too.

This is mostly for my own well being because i really need somewhere to vent/blog and why not make it public?

I love piercings sm, and will be getting more hopefully in the near future. I currently have 4 lobes, both daiths, 2 helixes, 1 nostril, smiley, frowny, tongue web, and a vertical labret. I really want snake bites, medusa, other nostril, and dimples, as well as a shit ton more on my ears. Have to wait until after my dad’s funeral though, his family is very conservative and my mom doesn’t want to be judged.

I really like working out and have a bit of muscle, but i wanna be way more toned.

Still unhealthily obsessed w my ex who dumped me right after i got out of the psych ward the first time (and ditched me to drink alone, which is when i almost died) he was good to me before the end, I think he’s in jail now though, not positive. He just kinda disappeared.

Mom keeps trying to send me to a ed clinic, rehab, or RTC so if i disappear i probably didn’t die.

Came from twitter but it’s shit now so i’m here, i like it so far.

I used to self harm a lot, like a lot. Used to have a shtwt account but we don’t do that anymore, it made me feel special because i could cut to beans 😬. I won’t post any gore on here. If i ever post my body (unlikely for a long while) be warned there will be scars.

edit: I’m also depressed asf if u couldn’t tell 😭 barely hanging on by a thread. I need to clean so bad i’m considering overdosing on sudafed to give me the energy.

I live w just my mom, my brothers in college, and my dads dead (obvi) probs gonna have to move now that we only have one income.

I doubt anyone read this but that’s my whole life basically. I’m really sweet but get so scared ppl r judging me when they interact so i may not answer 😭

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impeccablebackside · 2 months

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any characters that would always become horny when drunk? and how would their significant other react?

I appreciate the question anon. I will admit that I do not drink at all (I am loosely straight edge - I know, so cool of me), so this ask is not something I have thought about. Either way, I say that truly drunk people are not really very sexy when they are past that threshold of being drunk versus just 'simply drinking'. I am sure we can all appreciate the stereotypical stumbling or slurring kind of way about drunk folk that honestly renders them more childlike or infantile that a normal adult would be. I am also not big on the idea of someone losing their inhibitions under the influence of whatever thing. Does that sound super pedantic? I am sure it does, so apologies anon and dear followers. No judgement on my end, I promise.

It is not to say that a few drinks or whatever are not generally fun or could not enhance any sex though, so please let me be clear on that. Casual drinking is all well and good, and if there were alcohol or other things that the cats could / would get their paws on, then all the better. I know they would be responsible and have an ability to do it in moderation, and if not, personal choice in the end.

Thinly masked analogies aside, there is certainly a lot of variance in how any of the characters would act while drunk and further how horny they would become.

Vic, if she did drink (which would not be much, both in amount and frequency - she is a big time light weight), gets so unbelievably sappy and loving when she is drunk. One of those girls who sits there and cries because she loves everyone and everything so much and 'you have no idea how much you mean to me' kind of drunk. When she sees Plato, she is literally hanging off of him giving him kisses, hugging him, and nuzzling him because she loves him so much that 'he doesn't understand'.

Plato does not drink for personal reasons, and he is extra protective when he finds his loving little queen to be so emotional in her drunken state. He will carry her home and make sure she is safe, curled up beside her while she murmurs to herself about how nice he always is to her and that 'she doesn't deserve it'.

Rumple, perhaps unexpectedly, gets really sad when she is drunk. Sort of like an emotional clarity that brings a realization to all the sad things in her life. It makes her reflect on why she is the way she is with being so hedonistic, and it's really a bummer for her. Rumple carefully avoids drinking too much as a result.

Mungo sorts of gets like Victoria when drunk, where he is extra clingy with his little calico, and certainly reminds her a dozen times an hour how much he loves her. He also makes sure she swears that she does indeed love him too, honestly, for real. Being drunk does make the tom horny, but as soon as he is raring to go, he ends up passing out / falling asleep wherever he is and sleeping it off.

Tanto abstains from drinking. Introducing something that could alter her mental state has never appealed to her, and through her own meditation she can reach a different mind-plane anyway. The queen can effectively change her mood and yearnings if she quite literally sets her mind to do it. As a result, she can make herself horny beyond just thinking about ass and pussy.

Cori gets ridiculously horny when drunk, almost embarrassingly so. He wants to fuck anyone and everyone, and runs around haphazardly with a boner hoping for a partner to agree on a go-around. While he rarely remembers fully what he was like, he has been told that he fucks like an actual animal when drunk in the most thrilling way.

Cass has a rather high tolerance, and is essentially never drunk. Having some (or more) alcohol in her does not make her hornier per-se, but it makes her more aggressive during sex. More biting, more clawing, more of that good-good femdom fun. She lets her inner tiger out.

Alonzo also can drink others under the table and completely walk it off afterwards. Being drunk also makes him more aggressive, but in a negative way. He is a 'wants to fight drunk', but is smart enough to ration his intake so that he does not become an asshole.

Bomba gets progressively horneir the more she drinks (up to a point of course), and it makes her sexual appetite ravenous. Luckily for her, Tugger is exactly the same way. What starts off as innocuous turns into both of them mounting the other while rubbing their bits against the other's body. Partly alcohol-fuelled fuckfests between them leads to messier sex too, with either of them slobbering on the other's parts and cum literally everywhere after multiple creampies or cumshots from the tom.

Misto is a lightweight with drinking, but his tolerance is rarely the same from day to day. Sometimes a bit will get him off his ass, and the tom gets into a horny and submissive headspace. Realistically, he ends up roped into Bomba and Tugger's escapades, and gets used like he wants.

Deme does not get horny when drunk, she gets sort of silly. Letting out her more joyful nature in off occurrences, she ends up as a giggling mess that is not at all typical of her sober self. Munk, who is ironically the same way, finds it endearing. When they both end up drunk, they think their partner is the funniest person they have ever met and will tell lame jokes or do impersonations of other cats late into the night.

Jenny gets very loose while drunk, and in her more relaxed mood, she always finds it to be a perfect time to give anyone in the immediate area a stripshow and lap dance. It is not from a place of horny need, she just thinks it is fun as hell to get wild and swing her titties around in other's face. Others do agree on that too.

Busto is a whatever the feline equivalent of a sommelier would be. Tasting and savouring his alcohol, and sometimes overdoing it. Drunk Busto is a party animal of sorts that pushes aside his elegant demeanor in favour of (still fully) enjoying life and treating others to a bit of his luxurious life. He the proverbial leader that will drag also drunk friends from place to place eating well before they retire for the night in a cozy spot. While not overly horny, things usually end up happening, and the fat tom always ends up getting some.

Skimble is a functional alcoholic in a way, with a hip flask filled with his favoured scotch for whenever he needs an extra kick. He is known to take a swig before fucking his partners good, but it does not make his performance any different.

Jelly is a once of year / does not drink kind of queen, so it is sort of a mute point that drunk Jelly becomes very horny. She particularly likes dressing up as Griddle and going to town on whoever is around.

AGus drinks far more often, and ends up getting very sleepy when he gets drunk. Nap time is sometimes just as rewarding as ass-slap time for him.

#i always appreciate new ideas on here anons #so send them my way if you want #i do not have much in the way of how much do the drunk cats want to bang but i can appreciate the question

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