#also please give me good fanfics to read for them im dying

[paletigers]

Don't mind me, just thinking about Sokka becoming the Southern Water Tribe Ambassador and just bothering the shit out of Zuko in the Fire Nation.

[crescentfool]

I noticed you're a Ryomina!!! How did you get into it? And do you have any good fanfics/doujinshi you can advice me to read? ANYTHING on Ryomina actually? I'm dying for anything about them!!! Thanks!!

yes!!! it's me!!! i'm ryomina fan (one of many)!!! thank you for visiting my askbox, i'll do my best to answer all of the questions because it always makes me happy to see that ryomina sparks joy for people! :D

...this got really long because i like linking to things, so i'm putting it under a read more (IM VERY NORMAL ABOUT THEM)

how did i get into it? i got into persona 3 around august 2021 through the movies- at the time my only experience with the persona series was with P5R / P5S / P5D. p3 was the one that interested me the most (i thought minato was very pretty + i caught wind that the themes of the game were very resonant with people). i picked the movies over the game because i'm a guy who plays games at a snails pace, haha.

admittedly, i did latch onto ryomina because of the scenes in the third and fourth movie (i have mentioned in the tags of this art i drew how much i felt like i was exploding and blasting off to the moon watching it).

but what really dug me into the ryomina hole (and what has kept me there) was thinking about how much ryoji encapsulates the themes of p3- and how interconnected his fate is with minato. i wrote some musings about their dynamic here, if you're interested!

tl;dr: what if we were both boys and we were mirror images of each other and i inherited your kindness and looks but god doomed our narrative even though we're soulmates

on ryomina fanworks recommendations:

regarding fics: i'm going to assume that you've probably read the fics that have the highest kudo ratings on them, so i won't really be listing those.

a personal favorite fic that i always hold close to my heart is Eurydice's Vow by crescentmoontea, which explores the idea of ryomina in p5r's third semester. this was the first fic i read about ryomina and it made me tear up lots...

i also think a lot about I Alone Await You by Nail_gun, literally scrumptious writing that captures the ryomina dynamic so so well. actually check out Nail_gun's other ryomina fics while you're at it too!

other fun fic i'm fond of: can't get my mind out of those memories (what were they?) by foxmulder_whereartthou. ryoji being homeless lives rent free in my head and it's all because of this fic. there's a bunch of other fun ryominas from the same author too (i still need to read them)

BkZa555 also has some fun AU scenarios if you're into that too, notably with Zagreus (P5-Setting, Ryoji focus) and The Definition of Insanity (TIME LOOP fuckery!), but they're currently ongoing.

these were some ones that came to my mind first- as i have the strongest recollection reading them. admittedly i haven't really been reading fic this year, so i don't have many recommendations from fic that came out this year. but if you're so inclined to let ryomina consume your soul, i definitely recommend giving the newer works in the ryomina tag a look-see and see if it strikes your fancy!

as a side note, i do have a few ryomina fics that i've bookmarked on my ao3 here, though i have to say that i'm not sure how well they hold up in terms of like... what i would seek out of a fic these days. but they made past me happy so i bookmarked them, LOL. it's kind of outdated (my collection of fic recs has my old username *disintegrates*).

regarding doujinshi: i have not read all the ryomina doujinshi available, but as a starting point, please take a look at this list from pandora-scans from livejournal!

notably, this is where you can find the strawberry-chan say good bye doujin- which features a small and cute comic from shuji sogabe (the p3/p4 manga artist), as well as other artists. the existence of this doujinshi is the funniest thing to me because it's like "HEY if you're wondering what the volume 8 cover is really gay it's because sogabe contributed to a ryomina doujin." this fact makes my head spin (positive). it explains a lot about the manga.

regarding persona side material:

i know you didn't ask for these but i thought that i mine as well list these too, since i feel that the side materials have some fun expansions on ryoji and minato's interactions. i haven't... watched/read all of these but, hey, i like to share these things!

for comic anthologies for the persona series (some of which have ryoji!). if you're interested in reading them, here's a scanlation index from maboroshi-no on tumblr. i don't think this is a comprehensive list, but i think it will be a great starting point!

for some translations of the persona 3 drama cds, check out imaginary-numbers on dreamwidth! ryoji and minato interactions can specifically be found in the persona 3 character drama cd vol. 1, and for the audio + english subs, you can watch this video on youtube:

and ohh the musical. ryoji singing and dancing gives me so much joy. i haven't watched the musical in it's entirety (only fragments), but here are some links that may be of interest to you:

Ao no Kakusei (The Blue Awakening), Sakuya version - playlist for the first p3 musical, translated by Phoenix Maiika.

Ao no Kakusei (The Blue Awakening), Kotone version - playlist for the femc version!! also translated by Phoenix Maiika on YouTube.

Persona 3: The Weird Masquerade (English Subtitles) - playlist by rumio!

P3 Weird Musical DVD & Soundtrack Booklet Scans by rumio_k - twitter thread that links to these funsies, if you don't have twitter, here's the publicly shared drive link.

god. these sure are a lot of links, huh? i hope you enjoy them- pick and choose whatever sounds most appealing! (if this overwhelmed you im sorry GKLHLDH i just like being very comprehensive in my answers about things so i got carried away).

and as a reminder, you (and anyone else reading) are always welcome to browse my tags/archive and reblog things from there anytime! i have... nearly 300 ryomina posts which, while mostly consists of art, has a few fics, meta, hcs, gifs, memes, and whatnot scattered about.

or browse the minato and ryoji tags too! there's.. nearly 1k minato. and 500 ish ryoji. and they're going to keep on growing because i can't stop being obsessed with archiving these things. god help me i am so deep in this hole called ryomina hell and now you're here too. welcome aboard!

there's always going to be a lot of fun ways to enjoy rotating ryomina around in one's brain, i think- they're a pairing with such fun symbolic imagery that is So Deep (to me) but ALSO they're immensely hilarious and weird guys (affectionate). so i love to share these things in hopes that it gives you joy too! they are the most couple ever (to me) (i'm biased)

thank you again for the ask! i hope it can satiate your need for more ryomina, and be a nice aide in exploring the p3 fanspace :)

[merchantarthurn]

all i have to say about the miraculous special aside from incoherent happy noises is that it's exactly like every fanfic i hold dear in that it felt so self-indulgent when it came to fun "what-if" scenarios and also really hit on like. actual fun character beats (okay turns out i have things to say, so here's a spoilery read more)

starting immediately with the alt theme song with gabriel was so inspired i had to immediately pause and lose my mind.

gabriel as a significantly better dude who is just failing to connect with his son during their very different grieving periods is legit so much more interesting than i expected from a "character morality flip" moment

alya and nino being still on the resistance team fills me with a lot of delight for so many reasons - character related, but also for the alt-universe actually not being a 'everyone is a different alignment' universe. the overall universe and characters perceptions of themselves or how they dealt with their grief is clearly completely altered for the ones we see changed. like... gabriel seems to have started off in a similar spot but the specifics of the universe meant he changed teams for the better. emilie seemingly dying much more suddenly and the general turmoil of the universe (and presumably not going to school with the other kids?) leading adrien to not process his grief in the same way. marinette never meeting alya and not finding the courage to stand up for herself without threats and power. damn...

betterfly is a stupid name and i love that. just remember that his name is just "butterfly" and not "hawkmoth" in french okay.

shadybug is also very silly but it's a pretty perfect alternative for 'toxinelle' and also so funny

the only knock i will give the episode is she changed her hairstyle at the end. shadybug's whole look was 10/10, she could have just shifted the colour scheme for the friendly vibe. i also think chat should have kept the green hair and maybe just gone with green eyes.

on cool outfits: the butterfly + ladybug combo looked gorgeous imo i will not argue on this

i was not expecting the episode to make me feel things but it was genuinely very sweet how both AU-duos got a mutual pep-talk. like this was a perfect time in s5 for it to be set - marinette's still struggling to find belief in herself and adrien is freaked out about what his power could do to someone, and his own self-control about that. and their chats with their alternate selves help them settle something (at least for now) in addition to helping the other!! their AU selves definitely have more to deal with given.. everything, but that's for another time im sure >:) i really do like that despite their Attitude they are just treated like kids with problems y'know? honestly i wish adrien had longer to talk about his grief cos i think that's a really valuable bit of telly for young'uns who've lost a parent y'know?

there's some #Logic you could do about identity reveals but honestly i do not care, because an actual fanfic where they're like "hey butterfly man if you told us who you were we could stop monarch way faster" and that resulting in some good!gabriel and chat/adrien chatting with him knowing who hawkmoth is like... ARGH. imagine. i feel like there's so many reasons he wouldn't want to expose his identity even to allies and we didn't need a scene where that was explained and i'll fight anyone who insists it's a ~cinema sins plothole ding~ that it didn't happen. if it's not in the show you get to fanfic it in many flavours. this is a WIN actually.

generally ive been so happy with season 5 and this just. ah. idk i was just very happy the entire time. im sure there'll be a lotta folks bemoaning this that and the other and that's fine! please have fun doing that cos i know people do but man mlb is to me my fun baby show for babies but season 5 feels like it went "what if this show was everything you already loved AND it gave you catharsis on like 30 different things on a show you've been watching since episode 4"

[yuukei-yikes]

sorry ive been so autistic over this for a while so im going to bother you with this

anyways timeskip kidomomo. they're married. they're living together. hibiya (16) comes to stay with them for the remainder of his high school years bc the high school he wanted to attend was in the city and even though it took A Lot of time convincing his parents, they let him attend and let him stay with kidomomo since they live in the city as well. this also involved having to introduce them to his parents and kdmm lying about how they met hibiya.

so now kdmm are his temporary guardians. hibiya is like a son to kdmm. they're happy to be his gay moms. hibiya insists that they're not his moms and they should stop calling him their son but you know they still call him son anyways. kido even does that dad thing where they put a hand on his shoulder and go "listen, son.." before giving him advice on anything.

it also took hibiya quite a while to get used to kdmm's Four Cats bc. you know (he's worked out his trauma with cats kinda but he still has a dislike for them. has a personal vendetta against kido jr., one of kdmm's cats). kido helped him get used to the cats, now he's on okay terms with most of them (kido jr. still doesn't fuck with him. no one knows why. hibiya doesn't fuck with her either 😒). hibiya said to kido that even tho he was fine with the cats, he still wasn't rly too fond of them. cut to later where kido found him asleep on the couch holding megatron 3 (another one of kdmm's cats) in his arms.

one time hibiya was tired and called momo "mom" and oh my GOD momo did not let that boy live that down. god momo would be That type of embarrassing mom. when kdmm drop hibiya off at school she's like "BYE HIBIYA ILY 👋👋" and hibiya is speedwalking to the doors of the school and dying of embarrassment. since she's hibiya's guardian for the time being she wants to help him with Everything, like homework or relationship advice (more on the relationship advice bc she does Not need him acting like how he did at 11 with another girl) or his emotions and shit. and she would celebrate all of his little accomplishments too, like if he came home and said he got an 100 on a test she'd take him out for ice cream and put his tests on the fridge. hibiya thinks she's soooo embarrassing but he still appreciates her being like this to him. sorry im a bit insane over mama momo

also imagine kdmm at hibiya's graduation. oh momo would be SOBBING and kido would be like "Proud Of You." (tears streaming down their face and bottom lip quivering) (they're barely holding it together)

thats all im writing here bc i dont wanna be Too Insane in your asks 😁

I LOOOOOOVE THIS HC!!!!! YES! YES! YES! hibiya moving to the city for hs and living with kidomomo FOR REALS!!!!!! god him introducing them to his damn parents.... please thats so fucking funny. i dont wanna write much bc this is its own good read but god please i love these long asks and reading small fanfics in my askbox. so fucking good. please more of these. also the lore of kidomomo's cats intrigues me so much.... kido jr...why wont u open ur heart...

i think hibiya would be so nervous to bring it up and then momo's like YES. YES. YES. YES. PLEASE she's the one moving the situation forward to make hibiya move in... his parents wont step out of the village so momo and kido travel to the village and momo's flashy EXISTENCE makes everyone like ?!?!?!?!?!? augh. like this would be such a good fic idea, momo&kido going to meet hibiyas parents...

[lissalizzie]

Okay so a couple of days ago I made a post about how I couldn't write fanfics about Chishiya because I couldn't imagine him as a guy who would be in a romance without sacrificing his girlfriend for a card or visas, and some very cool person suggested me to write an angst...AND I DID ahahahaha.

Ookay, somethings you should know now: I'm Brazilian and I speak Portuguese, I learned English by myself and this is the first time I try writing anything in English so IM SORRY IF I MADE ANY MISTAKE

Second thing would be

THIS IS ANGST SO IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT OR IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BAD OR UNCOMFORTABLE PLEASE DON'T READ IT

It also contains death, psychological manipulation and violence

Please dont romanticize it too, it's not a romance story, it's just the conditions I imagined for Chishiya to be involved with someone

Chishiya x Reader

You were hurt... So hurt you couldn't even begin to explain that feeling.

It was true You were somehow grateful because you were alive at least... Your friends couldn't say the same, and neither all those people you saw dying every fucking game.  But you just couldn't... Not to think about how pointless was being alive and alone at that place... Alive, alone and fucking in love with a person who had an Ice cube in a shape of a card in the place of his heart.

You knew from day 1 when you met Chishiya and Kuina at the Beach, when that boy with the mysterious look came to you for the first time for "a talk" that nothing good could come from that. Nothing, except, maybe, for Kuina's friendship... She, who was the first person who notices the mess you was doing and tried to stop you... As the great blind stubborn you were, You just didn't listen at the time... You was at a fucking game world, playing for your life almost everyday, dealing with deaths and losing people... Missing the ones you loved the most, those ones you didn't even know if were or weren't alive... You could deal with a stuck up  boy, because that's everything you thought he was... Your mistake... Well, You've recently discovered You're pretty damn good in making mistakes here.

Chishiya discovered yout feelings because at some point you couldn't manage to fight for your life and hide it... He noticed and started to be there for you after every game, specially the harder ones. He didnt talk anything, he just was there... He didnt touch you either, but he got to spend more and more time looking at you while you both were on bed... Those eyes, just as cold as him.

You didnt touch him, but you imagined he would be just as cold as that look... But you also believed he would be that deep... Like oceans. Chishiya was a grey ocean that you wanted so much, and every day more, to know...

You was so fragile, so fragile when he touched your skin for the first time, twice... The first time with his hands that wasn't cold at all which just made you want him nearer... The second time with the lips that came from your face to your mouth.

The boy must've planned that for weeks, you could see that now, in fact, now you understand that must be the reason why he looked so much at you. You was that school subject Chishiya probably didnt have any interest on but really had to study to pass the test... So he did... And you did...

And for the first time since you fell into that hell you felt alive, you felt like someone, just one person was there, and that Chishiya cared... And that  he would do for you just as much that you would do for him.

You were so blind and in love... He started saying things about plans and you were so happy cause you thought that meant he trusted you...  The first time he mentioned you on a plan you couldn't stop smiling, you were finally a part of someone's life there, it was like having a purpose again... And also being with him felt so much like action and... Not knowing about the next second because he was so... cloudy.

God, if only you could talk to yourself in the past, if only you have stopped for a second and gave that situation a better look... You felt so dumb now...

Well when he asked you to go to that place at night you... Just went, because you trusted him with your life by now. You knew somewhere deep in your heart that you shouldn't... Not just him but anyone... But it was a need, you were alone for a long time and then you found him... And then he started acting that way with you... He caught you out of guard...

It was silent, you didnt understand why you should be there, but the fact is that you were so afraid. Chishiya only said to be there and walk... It wasnt that much, but just as fast as you got there, you felt something on your back and then everything was dark.

When you woke up, you were in a room and Niragi, just with a couple of other important people -you just knew they were important because they were with the Hatter, the only one you could recognize besides Niragi because of the colors of his clothes.- You barely could see, actually, your eyes were still dealing with the lights.

- So that's the little bitch, huh? - You could listen to Hatter's voice. He came near of you and showed you a couple of cards. - Trying to steal from me ? You bastard really thought you could steal from me and just run away ?

You just didnt understand, you didnt had any card with you. You knew what happened to traitors and you always gave your cards to the beach just as you was told.

-B-But... I give my cards to you, I know I do. I'm not dumb

- Oh honey, dont play the stupid card. We found the cards with you, you were running away... You have many here... You haven't been to all this games lately, have you ? Have you been stealing from someone else, darling? - Hatter seemed to be genuinely angry and you were so afraid to say anything.

-I...

- Yes... - And you heard that familiar voice... That was Chishiya but you were hoping he would only come to help you... - My cards have been disappearing as I told you. I connected that it happened after every game I played with her after we became close... That's when I came to talk to you... - That was so much information you couldn't even handle. Chishiya betrayed you, lied about you and used you as his little toy just so he could... Distract people while he was doing whatever he was really planning and wasn't telling you... It was so clear... Oh God you felt so dumb and now it was like all your fights for being alive in that place had no value at all... Because you let yourself get caught by that stupid feeling...

Chishiya looked at you with the same cold eyes as always, no guilt... You wasn't expecting any, not after that.

- Well.. Death for the traitors, that's what you've been told - Hatter was just ready to give the orders to Niragi and you didnt really think you deserved to die by the hands of such a disgusting person

At that point you could only cry cause you knew it wasn't worth it to try arguing... Chishiya was too damn smart and there would be no evidence of mistakes if you knew him...

- She was stealing from me, right ? So I think I have the right to end this with my own hands? - Everyone got so surprised because Chishiya wasnt exactly the kind of guy who got involved with the dirty part of the job.

- Are you sure about this ? - Hatter never really doubted about Chishiya because he knew how much about himself he didnt show people... So Yes, killing someone because of a couple of cards didn't surprise him at all, maybe because he would do the same. - Whatever... Just be done with it by the morning... And dont even think about playing any kind of game Chishiya... You could be the next one.

Chishiya wasnt even listening. Niragi seemed literally so frustrated but, at some point, all people left.

Chishiya caught the gun that was above the table and came near you. You were crying silently but so hard... - What do you want? You wanna torture me now? Seeing me playing the stupid in love all this time wasnt enough for you? You want to literally kill me? How did you do that? - You were screaming, at that point you didnt care if someone would hear.

- You don't understand, right? - And then he showed a couple of cards, this time, one of each... Oh god... He literally used you to get Hatters's cards. - I'm sorry you made the wrong choices... But I needed to to this... I want to get out of here just as much as you...  About the plan... You know I have access to the cards after the games... It's not that hard to steal the repeated ones, they don't pay that much attention on them... And also, just after I did it, I came to talk to Hatter about my card disappearing so the he wouldn't miss anything... It wasnt that har actually, it was just a distraction... But you know so much about me and my plans so I couldn't let you alone with Niragi or any of those people cause they're so dumb they might believe you and that's would be a problem for me... So

- You bastard, What do you think you are? God? You think you can just come and sacrifice people? - You wanted to beat him so hard it almost gave you the strength to break that stupid string around you. He just smiled that way you used to love but now make you nauseous.

- If I were god... I wouldn't allow people as easy to manipulate as you to live with the others, darling... Dont blame me for trusting the person everyone told you that shouldn't be trusted... Now... Let's get this done. - He pointed the gun at your forehead and you screamed as you closed your eyes.

- Please... Please Chishiya. I didnt mean anything for you at all?

- There's no meaning when there's no feeling, y/n... You're not in high school, you're playing for your life, and so am I... And you lost. I'm so sorry for you. - For the first time he seemed to be nervous but you couldn't see much anyway... He pulled the trigger... And then it was over.

[washymylifeaway]

Haikyuu fanfic recs but they’re funny (to me LOL)

I made an angst pt 2 fic list (which is linked here), but while I was making it I thought screw this sad stuff. Time to make a meme post. So here are some fics that made me bust a lung (or something along the lines of that). Yeah some most of these are cp, but go read them again idc, they’re funny and that’s that. My sense of humor is a tad bit broken, so keep that in mind as you read these (cause if you don’t think they’re funny, you’re probably right but stupid things make me laugh hehe). Don’t judge me too hard LOL. Also some of these are more fluff or whatever just take it ahahahaha.

As per usual, pls check WARNINGS, TAGS, and SUMMARIES for each fic before reading (just to be safe cause they curse a lot LOL) and make sure you’re taking care of yourselves (since mental health is key!) Stay healthy loves <3

CP:

The SakuAtsu meme drabble fic CAUSE IT’S FUNNY /SakuAtsu/ it’s literal art. The creativity and skill that went into this,,, PLEASE if anything, just speed read it. I LOVE IT SO MUCH AHAHAHA.

Add New Contact by booksong (G) 8.5k /DaiSuga/ this one! It’s so cute and poor Daichi LOL. He really out here doing the most,,, Anyway, we love tech Suga, and a nice dash of snarky tsukki (LOL is he salt, yes yes he is). It’s very fluff and pine, so if you want to read Daichi having gay panic like 24/7, go right ahead LOL. 

Camellias by kiyala (T) 1.9k /KyouHaba/ I really love magic and their interactions are so cute and the PLANTS ARE DOING THE MOST. Pls read both in the series, cause domestic KyouHaba is best KyouHaba ngl LOL. I love the plants, and if you read the second one, someone tell the trees to stop bullying Yahaba.

This gets annoying fast, Makki by Ink_stained_quills (G) 2.3k /MatsuHana/ IM IN LOVE WITH THIS SERIES PLS I COULD NOT STOP CRYING TEARS OF LAUGHTER. This AU needs more fics PLEASE. It was SO freakin’ funny and the other teams KILLED ME. Like how they all approached the problem differently and how some of them (KUROO) asked for help LOL. Please this is so freaking funny go read it.

Sixth Time's the Charm by tsumekakusu (T) 2k /KyouHaba/ ok THIS was SO FREAKING funny, please Yahaba how dumb can you get LOL. The number thing made me facepalm so hard, but the ending was cute and that’s all that matters, right?

rated m for by orphan_account (T) 10.7k /MatsuHana/ I love this fic it made me laugh so much throughout the whole thing! The vibes in this fic are immaculate and give me life (we love a good reunion with mystery writers) please, it really is SO good!

Sleep by GangstaCrow (T) 5.5k /KyouHaba/ the plot twist.... omg.... I had to pause and take a moment of silence for the people suffering because of LL... Poor Kyoutani.....

The One With The Spies by hangoverhater /Multi (but mainly IwaOi)/ PLEASE,,, the fics in this series? HILARIOUS. THE SECOND FIC ”Well, this is a nice change of scenery.” “It’s a prison cell.” “I was being sarcastic.” HAD ME DYING. Poor Daichi, he really needs those days off :)))))

smiles like yours are hard to come by by bonnia (T) 1.9 /KuroKen/ I was so akjfkajsdnf this entire fic PLEASE the lines he used omfg. They’re such classics but I still reacted to each one WITH PASSION LFMAKJNAKNKA. This is such a keyboard smash fic (hence the keyboard smash) because I kept being like THE FLUFF IS TOO MUCH, but is it ever really enough? (dang am I a poet LMAO).

New:

take me to the limit, hold me down there by volchitsae (E) 3.8k /SakuAtsu/ I ADORE THIS FIC. LOVE LOVE LOVE it and the rate my teacher comments? HILARIOUS. It’s only explicit at the very end (cause of some ~spice~), so if you don’t want to read it cause it’s E, just don’t finish it (JK LOL BE SAFE).

THE WIENER SOLDIERS by damianwayne (T) 46.7k /MULTI/ literally it’s a texting fic. THESE ARE SO FUNNY. I really liked this one, and it made me laugh regularly. I love the Yahaba vs Shirabu agenda, and it’s just really chaotic so maybe that’s why I think it’s so funny LOL.

behavioural response of the msby black jackal to newfound independence: a study by miya osamu by spacedhowell (T) 11.4k /a mess/ THE WAY I CALLED IT. JFJKADKLAJHDFA this one is so funny and it just escalates. The situation just kept getting worse and I just kept laughing. This was just so chaotic, I loved it LOL.

a little bit funny, this feeling inside by postcanons (G) 5.4k /KyouHaba but also a mess LOL/ PLEASE THIS ONE omg crow matchmaker ftw. Like I said, I really love magic and this one is just so freaking funny. Also, very informational curtesy of one Kyoutani Kentarou.

bet on it by selenophim (T) 13.3k /SakuAtsu/ this is just one long drawn out joke and I love it. It’s so funny how NO ONE really expected it (and some betrayal by one Miya Osamu), and it’s just some comedic genius!!!

Clipped To You by littleboat (T) 8.1k /SakuAtsu/ okay first of all THERE’S ART, second I love Omi in hair clips <3333 It’s really funny with lots of ~pining~ Atsumu and there’s cameo’s of other players,,, it’s just a great time :D

meet me at the fucking pit (and let me hold your hand) by anyadisee (T) 5.4k /KyouHaba/ IF THE TITLE ISN’T MAKING YOU LAUGH ALREADY WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING????? (JK but am I really?) This was SO funny and it KILLED me,,, like all the conspiracies and how everyone was so seriously invested in it. Yes, CHAOS.

call me maybe by totooru (T) 33.6k /MatsuHana/ okay yea another (semi) chat fic,,, fight me. MatsuHana are just funny in general but throw some other characters (like Kuroo) into it and it turns into a comedy show. But the main point of this fic was like the near miss meetings and I think that the misunderstanding were hilarious (as much as I hate misunderstandings LOL).

This is it FOR NOW ;) If you want more, send an ask,,, I have more LOL. Also sorry for the sheer number of CP’s I did from my other posts teehee,,,, I was lazy okay? If you read my angst fic lists, read this to offset the sad. You need to,,,, a must not an option! Also, ignore the way I lean towards more of some ships than the others,,, fic writers just tend to make some ships funnier than the rest :’))))

[xiaophobic]

WAIT JSKDCBHN I DIDN'T SIGN MY LAST ASK HSHSHSHSH I FORGOT IM SORRY,,, but you are right my love, the one that asked for domestic genshin teams was none other than i, sunflower anon ;) ngl that wouldn't have made much sense without context so i'm glad you were able to figure it out also yes i agree with beth slander, anemo cube go brr

DON'T BE SORRY FOR GOING TOO LONG ! READING YOUR ANSWER WAS SO FUN AND YOUR TEAM IS SO CUTE HELP,,, ESP THE ONE WHERE ZHONGLI & SUCROSE WEAVE FLOWERS INTO EACH OTHERS HAIR THAT WAS ADORABLE 😭 now *rubs my grubby little hands together* brain rot sharing time

For context my main team consists of albedo, venti, xingqiu, and keqing and I’ve grown too attached to every single one of them that I have zero clue on who to switch out when wishing for eula

Venti <- this bitch is my platonic soulmate and we’d most likely beg to share rooms

I get the feeling that albedo and xingqiu would share one, bigggg room that they evenly halved. Dont ask why it just felt right, and albedo is more often in some spare room that he turned into a lab so xingqiu can invite whoever and let them crash in his room

Keqings the only one with a single room and i dont think shes mad about that because her room is,,, so full of paperworks,,, neat and orderly yes but pAPERWORKS-

Alr ive assigned rooms now so onto whatever happens inside *stretches fingers*

I’d say we’re pretty even in terms of whos responsible and whos not, so unless albedo becomes in charge of watching klee there shall be no fire to be committed

Its funny how we have a god and a nonbeliever under one roof, so i think keqing would be skeptical around venti. But of course, ventis playful nature and fun demeanor would likely win her over, so now she treats him like family as well

Though that said, she’d also find herself scolding both me and venti on our uhhhhh tendencies to be lazy HSHSHSH she fr tells me to stop procrastinating in game every five seconds, so imagine if she was put with mr wine aunt barsibado?

Cute friendship between albedo and xingqiu because theyve made a book together and two educational boys,,, the amount of braincells in one room is ridiculous

Remember when I said keqing was happy she had a single room? Its because of her rex lapis dolls. Neither venti nor xingqiu ever let her live that down.

In terms of cooking, venti and i are never allowed for our own good. Venti isnt a bad cook but hes definitely a chaotic one and i physically cant make pancakes if my life depended on it. Albedo is on cooking duty most of the time but if hes busy, xingqiu will do it (though he will throw out the carrots) because keqings often too busy

HAVE YOU SEEN THE DESCRIPTION OF ALBEDOS SPECIAL DISH?? ITS A WHOLE FANFICTION OMG

Venti making everyone flower crowns mmmmmmmmmm and specific types of flowers for each person... aw

Whenever xingqiu reads a new history book, sometimes venti will just go “LIES. THATS NOT WHAT WENT DOWN. PUT THAT BOOK AWAY AND ALLOW ME TO TELL YOU WHAT REALLY HAPPENED-”

Albedo and Keqing both staying up really late because of work and venti having to sing them songs so theyll sleep i am SOFT

A recurring theme I find in this team is that we all look like responsible upkept high society people but behind the locked doors youll find keqing trying to get venti to get tf up, xingqiu and i raving about some fanfic, and albedo making something explode in his lab on accident

Bonus because ive run out of ideas:

(keqing THIS IS A CANON VOICELINE) Sleep well... me? Uh... I still have a handful of things on my to-do list, but I'll call it a night once they are done.

(xingqiu) lady keqing… please, it's too late in the evening. Mr Kreideprinz, the new concoction, if you would.

(venti, putting down a frying pan) oh… so we’re using the potion tonight?

Okay so the quality of whatever this is isnt guaranteed and its 100% crack barely any soft HELP HSHSH but im typing this in the middle of science class so pls forgive me. I wonder how you feel when you get a super long ask in your inbox…? I hope you still dont mind ( ´^｀) have a nice day dearest!! I’ll sign off twice now so I wont forget next time KESHEJ -🌻 anon

BAE I LIKE DIDNT SEE THIS???? WAH IM SORRY FOR MY LATE RESPONSE,,

HELP YOU MFS ARE SO CHAOTIC??? THE BONUS LITERALLY HAS ME DYING WHY IS VENTI FULLY PREPARED TO KNOCK HER OUT WAGSH(<\%[^{*}

your team definitely has “burnt out gifted kid” vibes ABSHAHSHA BUT IN A GOOD WAY OF COURSE they’re just all doing their best to be their best (with the possible exception of venti, though i’d argue that around such composed characters he’d experience his own slight code switch)

i’ll give you one of my own personal headcanons and apply it to your team a bit since i feel like it fits!!

venti knows everyone he comes across, or at least can connect their face to someone he’s seen in the milleniums he’s lived — a relative or something. he’s the god of wind and freedom, so naturally he’s traveled to all nations in order to be free and see the world as he pleases.

given this, he knows everyone on your team. he can connect their faces to at least one of their distant relatives that he’s known before. that is, except for albedo, who was born of chalk. the first person in a while who he sees and knows nothing of, so he FREAKS THE FUCK OUT. he spends half of his time stressing over who he could possibly be the offspring of but ends up coming up short every time.

he falls under the impression that albedo just must be klee’s older brother who was just never mentioned, until klee confesses that they’re not related biologically. it remains the subject he loses his mind over at the bottom of each bottle.

ABAHSHAHSH I JUST LIKE THE IDEA OF VENTI BEING SECRETLY WATCHING OVER THEM ALL YKNOW? HE CARES MAN 💔

anyway, i’m sorry this was so late and i’m happy you shared with me, this was rlly a pleasure to read <33 i hope you’re doing well, and please remember to take care of yourself, sweetpea ⸜(*ˊᗜˋ*)⸝

[keoghans]

Hey Chuck

Hello and welcome to this Chuck Grant fanfic. I always loved this dude, and I see little to no work about him, so, I took it upon myself to do fic about him. I invented a character, his love interest, because I cant write reader insert, I just, it bothers the fuck out of me to write like that lmao. 

Special mentions for @notmykirk @liebthots @hellitwasyoufirstsergeant @alphapockets for proofreading, giving ideas and helping a distressed, nervous writer lol, you lot were brilliant!

This is super angsty, but also filled with fluff and stupid cliches. 

Pairing: Chuck Grant x OC

Warnings: angst, shitloads of angst. Mention of rape. Slight, non-explicit smut. Cursing.  

Word Count: 12k (I know, IM SORRY)

Epilogue 

Three knocks and an anxious wait.

The door was opened by the tall ginger that didn’t seem to ever age. 

“Hannah Davis! What brings you here?” he exclaimed with a broad smile as he hugged her smaller frame. 

“How are you, sir? You look great!” she replied and he furrowed his eyebrows at her answer.

“Hannah, the war is over, it has been for a while, I go by Richard, Rich, or Dick, please,” he said, as he let her in his house. He sounded the same, warm, emphatic, funny. 

“Old habits die hard, I guess,” she replied, checking out his living room. He lived in a beautiful, tall house, very homey. It had a fireplace on and a half finished drink on the nearby table. 

“My wife went to visit her brother, a man that’s never approved of me, so I stayed back,” he explained, serving another drink for her. 

“I remember when you first told me that he wasn’t fond of you and I wondered, how the hell does someone not like Dick Winters?” she replied and they both chuckled. 

“Her parents like me, and so does she, so… it doesn’t really matter”. 

Hannah didn’t marry post war, and it had been only a year, but most of Easy Company was already having children, marrying or at least dating. 

She had her heart set on someone but she had lost all contact with him and the Army didn’t help her trying to get what she needed.

So, after an hour and a half of reminiscing about the war, about Austria and the Eagle’s Nest, Winters caught up to her.

“Hannah, with all due respect… I know this isn’t just a casual visit, or you would’ve brought Luz or someone else with you,” he started, trailing off for her to speak. 

Hannah chuckled cynically, the man had always been prone to read people like a piece of paper. She struggled for a few seconds, her nerves coming back to her, scratching the back of her head absentmindedly.

“I’ve been trying to find someone… Someone from the Company, and I don’t want to ask the rest of the men because… Well, if this fails, I don’t want it to be gossip between them; and the Army couldn’t help me, they cannot give out information about former paratroopers,” she explained. 

“I have all of the men’s information with me, so, who are you looking for? Though—some information can be outdated, I haven’t updated it in a couple of years,” Dick said, looking for an old black book that had ‘Easy’ embroidered in the front.

“Say the name.”

“Uh… Charles Grant—NCO Chuck Grant.” 

Rick smiled softly, looking down as he looked for his name in his book. 

“What?” she asked, slightly embarrassed. He knew.

“Nothing. Sergeant Grant is an exceptional man, I felt deeply for him when he got shot,” he explained and placed a ruler under his name, handing the notebook to Hannah.

“I know he is, that’s why I’m looking for him,” she said, looking down at his name, copying the information of his address and phone number. 

Richard looked at her with his usual witty, warm smile. 

“Thank you, Dick” she said, closing the notebook and giving it back.

“Like my wife would say, ‘go get him’.”

///

Hannah had Chuck’s address and phone for a month and a half. 

Every time she thought about calling him, or showing up at his place, fear shook her body and threw her back to square one. She had taken a cab to her former Major in the Paratroopers for forty five minutes to find a man’s address and she couldn’t actually talk to him. 

Hannah laid in her bed, after a long day at the hospital. She was eating leftover carrot cake she had made a week ago, feeling dreadful, looking at the little paper with Chuck’s name sitting on her bedside table, and remembered the many times they shared. 

Bastogne was the coldest hell Hannah had ever experienced, and she knew it was never leaving her head after everything that transpired.

The trees exploded every now and again. As desperation settled inside each mind, everyone started wondering which was getting killed next. 

Then the casualties came: Joe Toye and Guarnere lost each other one leg to mortars, Don Hoobler accidentally shot himself in the leg and the blood loss took his life. Muck and Penkala got blown to pieces by another mortar. 

She had tried to save as many lives as possible as she had to shoot Germans from afar, fearing death every single second she moved around the snow covered forest.

She had short moments of peace, and most were laying in a foxhole, trying to gather some warmth, next to Chuck. 

Her body shook as she blew into her hands, trying to gain back feeling on her fingertips when Charles looked at her and grabbed her hands without a word, covering them with his calloused fingers, scooting closer to her. 

She was slightly taken aback. 

Chuck wasn’t a man of many words, he communicated more with his eyes and small expressions. He politely smiled at her as he rubbed his hands against her. 

“Thanks,” she muttered, nuzzling her chin deeper into her scarf that was tucked into her jumpsuit. 

Chuck just looked at her and kept rubbing their hands together. She noticed her blue eyes looking bright from the full moon shining down the forest. 

“I always hated the winter time, back in the states… and now more,” Chuck said, breaking the silence between them. 

“I know, I prefer to be burning under the sun rather than freezing my butt off.” 

“Cold beers,” he added.

“The beach.”

“Dipping into a river or the sea.”

Both exchanged small smiles. 

Chuck had always noticed Hannah, and stared silently at her many times, but barely exchanged a few words in the second year of their training, when she arrived in Toccoa. He knew she was Shifty’s friend, and someone who Winters relied on and trusted from what Powers had said to help her get into the Paratroopers. 

And she had proved herself useful, not only as a doctor, but as a sharpshooter, taking down snipers that others didn’t notice at first. She used to compete with Shifty on how many Krauts took down each.

Hannah always knew who he was, she remembered every and each name of the company, by nicknames mostly. He definitely called for her attention; he was polite, shy, only mustered a few jokes here and there, not like Luz, who couldn’t speak without joking. 

But she was never as interested in him until he helped her find warmth in a shattering cold in Belgium. 

Hannah remembered that with a smile—their first and probably closest interaction. It only took snow, people dying around them and a whole war for it to happen.

Friday, she thought, Friday would be a good thing for me to approach his house if, luckily, he didn’t move out before. 

///

Anxiety. Lots of. 

Hannah wasn’t on call at the hospital on Friday. She and her best friend, scheduled everything.

Angelina made sure she couldn’t back out of looking for the former paratrooper. She had helped her pick an outfit, helped with her hair, the whole ordeal. 

“Okay, go, go! It’s barely past noon, it’s a beautiful day, maybe y’all can go for a walk,” angelina said, taking a sip from her lemonade. 

Hannah was barely talking, her hands shook, she felt her pits damp with sweat, with a tight knot in her stomach. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, okay… I’m going, whatever, what could go wrong, what the fuck, he could only think I’m a fucking stalker, whatever right? Fuck—.”

“Oh my god, get out, I’ll take care of Trigger, let him have a stroll, and if by any chance you spend the night there—” she said, with a wink— “call me so I’ll stay and give Trigger his morning walkies,” Angelina commanded as she pushed Hannah through the door. 

“Good luck, honey!” She yelled as Hannah dragged her feet through the hot cement under the July sun. 

Every little thing that could go wrong played in her mind as she walked. Grant lived roughly twenty blocks away from her but she still wanted to walk there, to make it as slow as possible. 

Hannah checked the address in the small, torn piece of paper she had it written on and looked for 1612 for a bit, until she finally saw it.

It was a beautiful, tall white house, with a dark grey roof, a small porch with a couple of rocking chairs. A lot of small pots with flowers and different plants covered most of the front of the porch, which made Hannah think that there was clearly a woman living there. 

That made fear struck her again.

He’s probably married, there are rocking chairs and plants… none of the men of the paratroopers cared about fucking plants, why would Charles be any different? 

Fuck it.

Hannah shook her head, her curls moving along, stomped the ground after pondering for a couple of minutes, away from the house and took a few deep breaths before she walked up the three steps before the door and, with a shaky breath, knocked three times and took a step back, giving the door her back. 

She could sense her muscles completely tense, everywhere, arms, legs, stomach, and wondered why the hell she never got her anxiety completely treated like her PTSD from the war. 

What if a woman opened the door? I’d pretend I got the wrong house and run for the fucking hills. 

“Yes?” a deep voice said from behind her. 

Hannah could’ve swore her heart stopped for a split second.

She turned in her heel with the riddled feeling in her stomach when she met those bright blue eyes and the permanently tanned skin of Sergeant of Second Platoon, Charles Grant. 

His usual disheveled look was intact, she noticed, the droopy eyes and the resting annoyed face that was his trademark was still there, but it did change in a moment when he realized quickly who she was. His eyes widened as his jaw dropped slightly. 

“Hannah? Hannah Davis?!” he exclaimed, opening the door wider, taking a step forward shyly. 

Hannah swore her heart was thumping against her chest like a hammer, and was actually afraid Chuck would notice it. But all he did was try to find the words, stuttering slightly as he took a look at her.

“Hey, Chuck,” she said, trying to find her voice back from somewhere in her throat. 

Charles let a single chuckle out of his mouth before, sort of awkwardly, pulled her for a hug, crossing his left arm around her torso and the other one, around the shoulders.

Hannah was a hundred percent sure her heart could arrest at any moment and die right there. The man was hugging her. And she was hugging him back, the same way, when his perfume surrounded her and she closed her eyes for a moment, lingering her head above his shoulder, every single feeling she had ever felt for him rushing back into her stomach, untying the knot slightly, filling it with butterflies. 

“What a surprise! Come on in,” he said, as they parted, moving aside so she could walk inside first. 

Clean, super clean. The fact that the house was so clean yelled wife! in Hannah’s face. But she shook the thoughts aside, trying to focus on walking and trying not to bump into anything and make a mess of herself in front of Chuck. 

“You like it? I’ve been trying to decorate myself but… I don’t know, looks shitty to me still,” he added, standing next to her as she looked at old signs of tobacco brands, and a couple of paintings up white walls, complemented with an olive couch with three seats, a coffee table and a TV in front. 

And books, everywhere. Different sized, colored, some put in a small library in the corner, near the couch. Some were sprawled over on the coffee table and one on the couch, open and faced down. 

She took the books as the cue to find out and get it over with. 

“You and—and your wife must read a lot,” she said, sniggering internally as she awaited for an answer. 

Chuck let out a hearty chuckle, looking suddenly a bit embarrassed at her. 

“Uh, I’m not married,” he said, forming a thin-lipped, awkward smile on his lips. Hannah felt how her shoulders relaxed at the information.

“Oh—sorry, it’s just… It looks very homey, and you know, women do that work mostly,” she said, trying to sound innocent. 

“I learned a bit from my mom, and I found out that I really enjoy gardening and plants in general, that’s why there’s that many on the outside porch. Luz told me I was becoming a woman, I said, ‘what’s wrong with being a woman’?” Chuck said, scratching the back of his neck. 

“He fought side by side with one, and he still says that crap?” Hannah asked, remembering George Luz, the clown of the company. “Fuck him, I like how it looks, it’s homey and… looks warm, you know?”

Chuck nodded his head proudly, trying to shoot down a smile that tried to creep up, slightly blushing. 

“Listen, I was roasting some chicken, are you hungry? I have beers, too,” he said, pulling her by her wrist softly. This touch sent electricity up Hannah’s arm as she nodded silently, following him. 

She was sort of surprised by his cheerfulness. He was a very lowkey man, never spoke too loud, unless he wanted to mock one of his peers with Luz or Guarnere. He fumbled around the kitchen for a bit, before going through the back door to the backyard, where he had a barbecue against the wall.

And she could see him work, cutting up the chicken while it was still roasting, and noticed how he hadn’t put up any weight since coming back from the war, or losing any from the anxiety and PTSD. He had kept in form, his arms still big, as his shoulders, the black sleeves of the shirt sticking tight against them. 

Jesus, stop that! 

Lost in her thoughts, looking around the kitchen, she didn’t notice Chuck was back with two small sandwiches in hand, leaving them on a couple of plates as he quickly moved to grab two Crystals. 

“My brother taught me this amazing sauce, and it’s like pulled pork, but pulled chicken,” he explained, almost proudly of his handiwork. Hannah smiled and took a bite on it. 

Instantly, she had to suppress a moan that was about to fall out of her full mouth, as she widened her eyes at him. He smiled as he chewed and nodded his head like saying I know, right? 

After downing her bite with a bit of beer, Hannah finally breathed out to compliment his food, making Chuck blush again. 

“So, uh… what brings you here? Did you need anything?” Chuck asked, taking a sip of his beer again. 

I wanted to confess that I had feelings for you since you helped me warm up in a foxhole in Bagstone and you saved my ass when I got shot and you dragged me into a jeep to be taken away for a bit to heal, and I always wanted to kiss you for that but I’m such a fucking wuss, I never even dared to flirt. 

“Oh, no, no, I didn’t come to ask any favors, no,” she replied, chuckling nervously, “I—I’m gonna be honest with you; when we came back from Europe, I knew you had to do some recovery from the shot you took, that would need rehabilitation and… I was dealing with so much I couldn’t stay and I felt like shit for a long while for that—Shit, this sounds like I’m doing this to sleep better at night but no, I just want to say: I’m sorry, I should’ve been there like you were when I lost my ear to a kraut bullet, Chuck, I’m really sorry, and I wanted to check on you, see how you were doing…” 

It wasn’t a complete lie, Hannah knew that, but she still felt like what she needed to actually say was heavy in her chest. 

Chuck smiled, and turned his head slightly, pulling his hair up a bit. 

“The scar goes all the way to the back of my head, I—I should’ve died by the extent of my wound, but, it was mostly sup—superficial. My left arm is partially paralyzed,” he explained, lifting both arms at the same time but the left one was left behind as the right kept going up. “And sometimes it’s hard to s—” he closed his eyes as he struggled to say the word, his tongue frozen in the roof of his mouth for a couple of seconds— “speak, like, right now.” 

Hannah looked sorry, like a dog with a tail between its hind legs, feeling ashamed. 

“Don’t feel bad, I had my family and some of the men to help me, and very good doctors too, really, it’s not like you had to take care of me, you know,” Chuck added, grinning warmly at her. “George, Doc Roe and Speirs came almost daily to help, I was set; speaking of wounds, how’s the ear?”

Hannah moved her hair away to show him the scarred and dusty pink skin that reattached to her head after it got blown off in the Battle of the Bulge. 

Bullets and mortars were falling down the territory Easy Company covered. As much as anyone avoids talking about fear, they were all terrorized; the lack of winter gear, clothes, ammo, and food kept them all weak.

Hannah and Chuck were shooting non-stop, both with shaky breaths as they were still covered under a wool blanket, where only the gun and their eyes could be seen. 

“Hannah! Hannah, go help Shifty!” she heard Lip call her as he ran past. She sighed, not wanting to be any closer to the flying gunshots that were showering horizontally on them. 

“Go, it’s okay, go!” Chuck exclaimed, looking at her swiftly as he kept shooting. 

Hannah groaned in annoyance but still climbed up the hole. 

Chuck watched at her go, though her walk got cut short. She froze in her place and he knew something was wrong, and in a split second, she was on the cold ground, yelling her lungs out.

“Shit, shit, shit, hold on, Hannah! Medic!! Medic!!” he yelled as he let his rifle in the hole, crawling to check on the brunette. 

As soon as he turned her body around, his face grimaced in shock. She had blood flowing from her side into her cheek, eyes and mouth, as she gasped for a breath, steam coming from her mouth from the sheering cold. 

He moved her hair slowly, uncovering what was left of her ear, hanging from skin threads, almost completely shredded from her skull. It was an awful view, and the crimson liquid kept flowing and flowing. 

“What is it? Let me see, Grant, move!” Eugene Roe exclaimed, pushing the other soldier aside, checking the wound thoroughly. Hannah had stopped yelling, shock had settled in her body, covering her from the pain. 

“It’s superficial, but you will need someone to cut off the rest. Help me get her to the jeep, Grant,” he said after covering the hole with sulfate and a white bandage that went across her face. 

“Hannah, you’re going to be just fine, stay with us, come on!” Eugene yelled as Chuck lifted her from her back and legs, her face falling into his shoulder, bleeding on his jacket. 

Chuck glanced at her every few moments as he ran to where her ride was stationed, she looked paler by the second that passed, her eyes were closing and he had to keep calling at her to stay awake.

“Hannah, come on, come on, stay with me, stay with me!”

When she was finally strapped down the bed on the front of the sheet, he held her hand for a second before she was pulled away, disappearing into the woods as he had to ran back to his foxhole and keep defending their territory. 

But he kept wondering and wondering about her, until she came back two days after. 

“You came back almost good as new, ear-less, stitched up,” Chuck said, reminiscing.

“And I had to tolerate thousands of ear related jokes for weeks, and got called ‘Earnnah’ too” Hannah said, making them both laugh.

“Fucking Luz and his nicknames,” Charles said, shrugging.

“Anyways, I still don’t have an ear, but the flu I was going through had clogged my eardrum and saved me from being deaf on one side, right?” Hannah added, lifting her beer bottle to cheer for that.

“To the flu, baby!” he said and both drank.

A couple of hours went by and both Chuck and Hannah were already feeling more comfortable in each other’s presence. They laughed about some anecdotes, and updated on their current lifestyles.

“So, a tobacco store?” Hannah said, standing under the sun in the backyard, enjoying the warmth of a summer afternoon, much more relaxed. 

“Yeah, it was my post war dream, and I finally gathered what I needed to open it, it’s in downtown, 5th ave and Charleston. It’s cosy, small, but good enough to sell small things,” Chuck explained, clearly proud of his achievement. “You should come by sometime”. 

“I would, but I quit smoking a few weeks ago,” Hannah replied and Chuck looked surprised. 

“Really?” he asked, propping himself against a column he had set to sustain a small roof he had put up in his yard. 

“Yeah, but I’ll probably hit withdrawal soon and I’ll go back to square one quickly,” she replied, mocking herself and her power of will, making Chuck laugh.

“You still sing?” Chuck asked, and she knew exactly why he asked. “I still remember when we found that piano in the Eagle’s Nest, and you sang a few songs to us,” he said and a very small grin creeped up his lips, looking down at his hands. 

That was one of Hannah’s proudest moments. 

“I do remember that, and I still sing, yeah.”

The war had lightened up, somehow. 

Easy Company was on the works to clear the way into the old Nazi Town of Kehlsteinhaus, where they knew, at the top of the mountain, resides the crown jewel of the Nazi Party. A very glamorous house made only for Hitler and his closests friends. 

Winters dictated for the Easy Company to head straight to the Eagle’s Nest, after raiding the town and finding a place to settle for a bit. 

Hannah heard Speirs yelling the orders and they didn’t even think for a second before they started running up the mountain road towards the House. She ran next to Chuck, Popeye and Malarkey. 

They entered the premises slowly, looking around for Krauts, their guns up in arms. And all of them were surprised by the size of the place from the inside. 

It had grey walls, with bay windows every few meters, the sun shining through, illuminating the whole place. There were a few tables with a few chairs each, some silver plates and vases scattered around the living room, a fireplace, and on the far end, a grand, black and shiny piano. 

Hannah was immediately drawn to it, forgetting about the men popping bottles of champagne they found lying around, remembering instantly the songs her grandfather had once taught her when she was younger. 

The boys weren’t paying attention until they heard the first few notes Hannah pressed on. 

“Davis, you can play?” Spiers asked her as they got closer. 

I waited till I saw the sun, don’t know why I didn’t come

Hannah started singing, as a way to reply Speirs. 

Chuck was certainly taken aback by her singing voice, she had never mentioned before she could do that, that she had even learned or anything she did apart from training for the paratroopers and hang with Shifty. 

When I saw the break of day

I wished that I could fly away

Instead of kneeling in the sand

Catching teardrops in my hand

Her fingers seemed to be dancing around the keys like she had been doing that for a lifetime, as her voice shone through the notes she played. There was a sudden peace brought by the song, which no one could remember having heard before that moment. 

Chuck sensed his body relaxing, as he looked at the brunette who met his eyes not too long after.

My heart is drenched in wine

But you'll be on my mind

Forever

For a fleeting moment, Chuck felt no one was there but him and Hannah, as she kept singing, his breath catching in his chest, leaving him breathless. He knew he had been looking at Hannah with different eyes for a while, but he never actually realized it completely until that moment. 

Something has to make you run

I don't know why I didn't come

I feel as empty as a drum

I don't know why I didn't come

I don't know why I didn't come

“From then on, you guys would ask me to sing every time we found a piano laying somewhere in the abandoned cottages,” Hannah remembered, smiling at the memory. 

“Well, you do have a beautiful voice that puts everyone at ease, you know,” he complimented and Hannah could feel how her pulse accelerated at his compliment, cursing herself internally for being so weak for her former NCO. 

“It's mid-afternoon, care for a tea?” Charles asked, when he noticed her blushing, not answering his compliment, knowing he had hit somewhere inside her with it. 

“I can make a quick cake with anything you have in your kitchen, if you want to…” Hannah said, almost rushedly, trying to cover her tracks. Yeah, that doesn’t sound weird at all, Hannah, you fucking wuss, offering to bake a cake after a couple of hours chatting and trying to cover your stupid feelings, sure, yeah. 

“Kitchen’s all yours,” Chuck said with a grin, looking for his kettle to boil water while Hannah looked for her ingredients for a classic vanilla cake. 

As Hannah whisked the ingredients, Chuck served two mugs with boiling tea, placing one next to her as he watched her focused in his kitchen. 

“I swear, most men of the company don’t have all this stuff laying in their kitchen,” she said, still looking down at the mix.

“I’m not most men,” Chuck replied and both chuckled at his comment. “Oh, look here,” he said suddenly, making Hannah turn around.

A black cat with a small bell in his neck walked in, stretching its legs, and walked up to Chuck, placing its front paws in the dirty blonde legs. 

“This is Roe, I got him a few months ago, he walked in with a broken hind leg and never left this house,” Chuck explained, taking the cat into his arms, which made him start purring loudly. Hannah proceeded to pet him, sliding her fingertips slowly in the soft fur of the head. 

“He’s so handsome!” 

“Thank you,” replied Charles, earning a small slap in his arm by Hannah, who chuckled as she kept petting the kitty. 

“You saying you took care of this kitty reminded me of that nun who changed my bandages in Foye, in that church, remember that? She came straight to me, wondering how a woman is in the Forces, and silently, pulled my face and cleaned me up,” Hannah said, remembering the face of the woman in the black typical suit of a nun. 

“She didn’t treat anyone but you, which was either great or very selfish of her,” Chuck said, jokingly.

“She was in a convent, they take care of women mostly, and I am one, so…” she trailed off, wanting to slap the grin out of his face as she felt her heart melting to the view of Chuck, holding a cat between his arms like a child. My uterus is flipping about. “It’s not like no one took care of you boys.” 

“What are you talking about?” Chuck wondered. 

“Holland. All those women, and food, and drinks, and praising,” Hannah said as she put the mix in the oven. She could hear Charles laughing at her comments.

 “I wasn’t doing anything there, I did accept food though.” 

“Oh, Chuck, come on, I saw you with that blonde that was taller than you, kissing you non-stop,” Hannah exclaimed, way too quickly for her comfort, and turned around, pretending to check on the oven temperature; Could you be any more obvious, Hannah, dear?

“You sound jealous,” Chuck replied, with a smirk and furrowed eyebrows.

“I—okay, yes, I was; everyone was treating you all like goddamn heroes and whatnot, while I got questionable looks and fingers pointing at me for being a woman in a uniform… Hell, they must have thought I was the squad’s whore or something,” she defended herself, trying to not blow her cover that easy in front of his intense eyes looking at her from a few meters. 

Chuck felt bad for a moment. He knew she was proud of being the first woman fighting alongside men in a war, knowing she had earned the respect of many, many people, but there was still a long way to go to be accepted by the population in general. 

“Yeah, I wanted someone to kiss me too and give me drinks, I deserved that too, I didn’t have any physical contact with anyone as much as y’all in that time,” Hannah kept going, the anxiousness to cover herself up from showing feelings almost drowning her. 

“I’m sure you would’ve gotten a kiss if you just asked,” replied Chuck, taking a sip from his tea while still holding Roe. “I would have if you asked me.”

Did my heart just stop? Did it just… really stop? Quick, don’t linger in silence too much!

“You’ve always been such a gentleman, Grant, but that was impossible. First, we were in the Forces together and that was very forbidden. Second, I couldn’t ask people for that, that’s just sad and I didn’t look like any of the women there, my hair wasn’t done, I was wearing our uniform and probably didn’t smell the best there,” Hannah clarified, trying to not sound too rushed again. 

“Okay, yeah, partially true, but you don’t need to be all fixed up to be pretty, though.”

He knows and now he wants to play soccer with my fucking heart. Goodness, I hope he doesn’t know.

“To be honest, it’s not like I came back to the states and started dating and whatnot… I did adopt a dog, his name is Trigger, like the one Tab had back in the day,” Hannah said, trying to clear herself. “Oh, and Tab asked me out like a year ago,” she suddenly remembered. 

“Floyd?! R—really?” Chuck asked, clearly surprised. 

“Yeah, he showed up once, with flowers and everything. It was so sweet but Tab is like my little brother, so I let him down slowly and luckily, he accepted it and we’re still friends,” she explained, remembering how disappointed he looked for a second before she explained herself to him and he took it with humour and saved their friendship from awkwardness. 

All the while, Chuck laughed heartily. 

“What? Oh, don’t laugh at him! He’s so sweet, he was always nice with me, even when most doubted the presence of a woman at war, come on,” Hannah defended Talbert, throwing a paper towel ball straight to his face. 

“Hey! No need to get violent!” Chuck retaliated, throwing it back at her. “I can’t believe little ol’ Tab asked you out,” he added, chuckling. 

“You’re all always making fun of people who ask me out or flirt with me,” Hannah added, a sneer creeping up her lips. “Remember that one British soldier?” 

The Company had saved a hundred and forty brit soldiers, without any casualties. Everyone walked back to camp cheerfully but in silence until they entered the barn. 

Hannah didn’t feel as cheerful as the rest. She had been carrying a small infection under her tongue for a few days and cramps were attacking her every now and again, which she didn’t share with anyone trying to avoid some sexist comment about the nature of women. 

Booze was being passed around the brits and the company as everyone cheered and applauded for their exceptional work. Hannah did enjoy seeing all the grins and wide smiles spread around, while she stood in the side, leaning against a thin wooden column, rubbing her back to ease the pain. 

“Moose Heyliger and the American 101st have done the Red Devils a great service, making it possible for us to return and fight the enemy another day,” the captain of the British soldiers exclaimed to the crowd of paratroopers and the Red Devils. “To Easy Company, victory, and Currahee!”

Everyone cheered, drinking profusely, laughing and all around happy, until the same captain interrupted them for a second.

“Oh, and let us not forget to cheer for one more thing: the first woman in the Forces who was part of this mission, Miss…” 

Hannah wasn’t paying attention, she was completely zoned out on the side, until she heard her name being called a few times. She looked up to the Captain, who had his drink up and looking at her.

“Oh—Oh, Hannah, Hannah Davis!” she replied, a little startled. 

“To Hannah Davis!” The cheers erupted once again, but everyone was now looking at Hannah, who blushed furiously at the attention she was receiving. She just gave them all a tight lipped smile, her eyes drifting from one side to another. 

“So, congratulations are in order, ma’am.” A thick British accent interrupted Hannah’s thoughts a while after she had been cheered on. She turned around to find a tall man with a buzz cut, his red beret and a pointy nose. And a very warm smile. 

“Thank you, private…?”

“Joe Seaward, and it’s Sergeant now,” he clarified, taking his beret off as he took a drink. “How is the Force treating you? Good, I hope?”

“Very good, sir, they feel like family already. At first it was weird for them, but I was vouched for by the Battalion chief, and one of the men, who is an old friend from his hometown,” she replied, feeling slightly intimidated by the brit. 

“I’m glad you’re feeling comfortable. And hometown! Where would that be, if I may ask?” 

“Atlanta, Georgia. Can I ask you where are you from?” she asked, looking up at him. Hannah could feel the eyes of Easy on them, but she didn’t dare to look back at them. 

“Birmingham, born and raised,” Joe replied, looking proud. “Uh, anyone expecting you back home?” he suddenly asked, and Hannah understood what he was referring to. 

“No, apart from family, no one special,” she replied, and just got interrupted by another voice yelling at them.

“Sergeant Seaward! We’re leaving, come on!” Joe looked annoyed all of a sudden. 

“Well, ma’am, if this isn’t too forward, when this war is over, and luckily, we’re both still alive and well, why don’t you stay in England for a while and… maybe we can go to dinner together?” He said, rushing as he took a few steps back. 

Hannah thought for a second and, feeling like she had nothing to lose and after not being flirted by anyone in two years, she replied “Sure, Sergeant, if we both survive…”. 

Joe smirked deeply and quickly found a paper and a battered small pencil, scribbling in it and placed it in her hands, before kissing the back of it. 

“You’ll find me with that. Take care, Hannah Davis! Cheerio!” 

Hannah felt like a child meeting her first crush, blushing, with a dumb smile in her face, until she heard the sniggering paratroopers behind her. 

“What?” she asked, already looking annoyed at them as she turned to find them in a half circle around her.

“What was that ‘bout, Davis?” Bull asked with one lifted eyebrow. 

“Nothing–”

“Not nothing, that brit was flirting with you!” Liebgott exclaimed, his lip curled as his eyes darted between the door of the barn and her. 

“The fuck is the problem with that?” Hannah asked.

“No fraternization with soldiers in the Forces,” Chuck added, looking down at his hands. 

“Oh, fuck all of you. It’s the first time someone comes and tells me I’m pretty in two years, when y’all had women throwing themselves at you back at Eindhoven!” Hannah defended herself, shutting them all up. “It’s not like I’m actually going to do something about it, I might be dead tomorrow anyways”. 

“He looks stupid and he’s a brit, we’re all a better catch than him!” Martin added, inflating his chest. 

“The only decent man here is Doc Roe, and you all know that for a fact. I’m going to sleep for a bit, goodnight” she said, walking away from them, breaking the half circle without looking back. 

“I still have that small, battered piece of paper with me, but I never went to see him,” Hannah added, smirking at the thought. “I should’ve stayed in England and find him, honestly”. 

Chuck frowned, “why? Was he really that interesting?”. 

“He was sweet, he had a very attractive accent and hell, how many men do you know that say ‘cheerio!’ When saying goodbye?” Hannah defended Sergeant Seaward.

“Oh, stop talking talking about him already” Chuck said, dismissing her comments with a frown.

“Who’s jealous now, huh?” Hannah joked, pushing him slightly. Chuck just laughed bitterly.

///

Chuck showed her around the house, apologizing for forgetting to do a tour when she first came in.

He showed him some old pictures he had from high school that his mom had taken of him, some of his own family, and even a photo from a high school girlfriend he still had. Charles told him they were still in contact because her family was close to his, until he went to the war and she moved out of the usual address. 

“It’s like the time I was away, fighting, home became a black hole in my memory, like…It couldn’t possibly exist at the same time I was away.” 

Hannah enjoyed learning more from his past, and suddenly wondered if he had ever known what happened and how Easy reacted when they found out he had gotten shot. 

Charles was looking down at a picture when she popped the question. 

“Chuck, did you uh—did anyone ever tell you what happened with Easy when you… When that replacement shot you?” 

He suddenly took a seat on the couch, looking up at her. There was something on his eyes that she couldn’t decipher, but it was between fear and curiosity; his fingers went to linger over his scar absentmindedly. 

“No, I—the guys never told me anything, and I didn’t dare to ask, honestly.” 

“Do you, uh… Do you want to know?” Hannah asked. Chuck nodded, his lips seeming sewn shut. She took a seat next to him, the air suddenly completely filled with tension. 

“Well, you had patrol and we were relaxing in the house, playing cards, some asleep, most smoking and chatting about the end of the war. Also about the points, but, that’s not important.”

“Then, the door of the living room burst open with a pale, very pale and shook Tab. ‘Grant got shot in the head’ was the first thing he muttered. You know, there wasn’t any music around us, but it seemed like it had stopped. The relaxing atmosphere was cut off like when the lights go out with a switch.” Chuck was staring at her, his attention fully on her. 

“But we didn’t have that much time to like… process. Floyd had received orders to find the shooter, and we practically went around the whole town and the ones nearby looking for him. We had the order to bring him alive but neither wanted to lose the chance to put a bullet in him. We were organized in groups, and we divided in three or four people each.”

“We ended up finding him still in Zell Am See. Malarkey found him with Bull and Lieb, they found him trying—” She took a pause, her stomach turning slightly at the memory— “trying to rape an Austrian girl. She was saved, thankfully, and he was brought back to the house where he took the beating of his lifetime”

By that point, Chuck jaw was opened, but his eyes seemed calmer, somehow.

“Did you beat him too?” he asked. Hannah suddenly broke eye contact, looking down at her fingernails fidgeting together.

“Yes, but I only punched him, the rest did the real beating… I was so angry when I found out he was in the house, I burst through the door and went straight with my knuckles to his jaw. I had my hand bruised for weeks. You were away at that point, Speirs and Roe had found a Kraut brain surgeon and got him to work in you as soon as they could. But we didn’t know if you were alive or not. After the rest took their turn with the replacement, Speirs had come back, saying the surgeon confirmed you were going to be okay; then they dragged the son of a bitch over to the MP’s.”

Hannah felt ashamed, her body seemed to be burning when the memories of that moment revived in her.

“I was so scared you were gonna die, Chuck… I wasn’t there when Speirs confirmed you were going to be okay, and I just—I lost it at that moment,” she added, a knot forming in her throat. “Lieb found me, while I was sitting in a room upstairs, on a bed, in the dark, cursing and crying. It wasn’t only you that made me cry, but… I cared about you, you know. You were my friend, we went through the worst together and I thought I had lost y—,” Hannah’s voice broke, and a single tear rolled down her cheek. 

“Hey, hey, Hannah, I’m here, aren’t I?” Chuck said, scooting closer, placing a hand on her knee and another rubbing her back. “I’m sorry for scaring you like that…”

At that, Hannah snorted while she teared up.

“What are you apologizing for? For getting shot? Jesus, Charles, you didn’t ask for it, did you?” she joked through the tears and broken voice, making both laugh cynically. Hannah lifted her head and looked at him, and noticed how his eyes were watery. He sniffed as he tried to recompose himself, his hands never leaving the brunette.

“No, I know, but… I’m okay, you s—see? I just speak like I’m dumb or something now,” he joked. 

Suddenly, something took over Hannah and she hugged him, with her arms surrounding his shoulders completely. Chuck was taken aback at first, but he then wrapped his arms around her waist and stayed there for a moment, neither muttered a word, only sniffs and breathing could be heard. 

Hannah laughs, then smiles down at the picture of a younger Chuck. Some things change, and some things stay the same forever. Chuck is one of those things that never changes.

After a while, after a hug that helped both recompose and even sort of heal wounds that can’t be seen, they went back to rummage through old photos. 

“Oh, look at this one,” Chuck said, pulling a picture from his teenage years, where he was in just his underwear, surrounded by kids holding different pieces of clothing cheerfully “that was in the middle of summer, we were trying to fight the heat with water balloons and I got so soaked, my brother and my friends convinced me to take them off so they could dry. Me, being stupid and young, did so and they stole them and ran away.” 

Hannah laughed loudly, looking at Charles with apologetic eyes.

“How could you be so naive?” She asked, between laughs. 

“Hey, if I remember correctly, you got your clothes stolen once, in Haguenau! And you know it sucks, doesn’t it?” Chuck replied, jabbing his index on Hannah’s arm. 

Hannah had survived Bastogne, with the scarring of her life and one less ear. Everyone was changed, they had lost many men there, including Toye and Guarnere, Muck and Penkala, and lost Buck to shellshock. 

These days passed with nothing much to do but waiting for orders, some training, and finally, after the snow had passed, winter clothes. 

Second Platoon was stationed in a tall, two-story house, with many rooms, filled with beds and some tables. It was battered, most wallpapers looked torn, and the smell of humidity and gunpowder filling everyone’s nostrils.

On a cold morning, Hannah came back to the second floor, where Malarkey was introducing the new Lieutenant Jones to the men.

“Sir?” her voice, smaller than ever, turned everyone around. Some had to take a second look to be sure what they were looking at. 

“What happened to you?!” Don exclaimed, his jaw dropped. 

Hannah was shirtless. She was holding herself trying to keep the warmth of her body, with only a bra, pants and boots on. She looked red in the face, from the shame. Hannah could sense the eyes on her body, taking notice of every single scar she was sporting, and the bandage that was covering one on the side of her hip. 

“I was changing bandages, I turned for a second to get the sulfate and I heard someone running and laughing. I thought there were just some men playing around but they had taken my clothes, sir…” she explained. Everyone could hear the anger in her voice, her jaw clenching tight. 

“Jesus fuck,” Malarkey muttered, while Chuck proceeded to pull the sweater he used under his jacket and quickly helped Hannah put it on. “Lieb, MccLung, Jackson, go find the fuckers who did this, report to Speirs”. 

“I’m sorry, Malark, I—I didn’t want to make any trouble, really, I—,”

“No, don’t apologize. This isn’t your fault, okay? Here, it probably smells but it’s better than nothing, I’ll have someone find some clothes if they don’t find yours,” Malarkey said, giving her his scarf, and went back to speak with Lt. Jones, who only nodded to her as a salute. 

“Come on, we made some coffee,” said Chuck, pulling her to where the kettle was in a corner. “Are you okay?”.

“Yeah,” was all she said, hiding herself in her copper mug, drinking the awful coffee they have been given. Then Chuck did something that she wasn’t expecting, but calmed her nerves quite quickly: his palm met the top of her head, and ran down her hair slowly. 

Hannah had seen the men do that to each other, when they had panic attacks or after the death of a fellow soldier, they would hold their heads or run their fingers through their hair. It seemed like a paternal way to hold them close and not let them fall into the abyss of desperation war brings in people. 

And now she felt it herself. Chuck’s fingers brought peace into her body, into her mind. She closed her eyes he kept going, enjoying that as well as the steam from the coffee meeting her cold skin. 

///

Not too long after, and from a window, Hannah and Chuck saw MccLung and Lieb dragging two soldiers from their jackets to Speirs and Winters. Joe talked furiously, clearly explaining what the two men did. 

Hannah chuckled cynically, knowing Speirs would have them doing the worst jobs for the Platoon. 

Her happiness didn’t last long, though. After getting new clothes, returning Chuck’s sweater, she found out, alongside the rest, that they had a patrol to get to at one past midnight. 

Everyone dreaded it, mostly because Second Platoon had lost the most people since Bastogne, and they still wanted them to do a senseless mission. They were ordered to cross the river into German territory and take prisoners to get intel. 

They still had hours to kill before heading to enemy territory, so Hannah decided to find some place to nap, after fixing and cleaning her guns and getting more ammo. 

She wandered around Second Platoon’s house until she found a room on the second floor. She opened the door, walking inside, and instantly found a sleeping body on top of the bed. 

“What? What?!” it said startled and looked up. Hannah didn’t notice at first but as soon as some light shone through the bullet holes on the wooden panels in the window, she saw Grant’s face. 

“Oh, sorry Chuck, I was looking for some place to sleep, I’ll leave you to—,”

“No, no, it’s fine… we can share,” he said from the dark, she could hear his hand patting the bed. 

Hannah thought for a second. She was exhausted, her body was still cold and there probably wasn’t a better bed in the whole house to nap in. 

So, she closed the door behind her and left her jacket and rifle on the floor, and climbed under the wool blanket. 

Under it, she was met instantly with Chuck’s warmth, her side wasn’t cold, as she expected it to be. There was calm, so much calm it was a bit unsettling for Hannah; last time she felt it, mortars fell from the sky and took her friends with the blast. 

But there was something about the gentleness of Chuck’s breathing that helped her, which she couldn’t explain, but silently thanked him for it. 

A few minutes passed when Hannah turned to her side, facing Chuck, who was already positioned on his side. She was unable to fall fully asleep, which was normal when someone tries to relax during a war. 

Hannah just stayed there in silence, eyes closed, her hand dropped on the mattress near her face, when she felt Chuck’s hand a few inches from hers. 

For a moment, she wanted to grab it. 

Hannah had noticed for a while that she was closer with Chuck than with the rest of the men. It was an odd friendship; it’s not like they talked for hours and hours on end but mostly in silence or with hushed, short conversations. But when she was with him, she didn’t feel as much fear as with the rest or alone in a foxhole. 

But he had always been there for her, like she was for him. Through every loss, through every problem. There was an implicit deep trust between them that neither acknowledged with words, but with simple actions. 

And to her, he was certainly an attractive man; with dirty blonde hair, an inviting smile, always polite and shy. And Hannah knew she had felt sometimes a bit of a butterfly in her stomach when he smiled at her. 

Suddenly, her thoughts were hushed when she felt his fingers wrap around hers. 

Hannah didn’t open her eyes, afraid they would show how much speed her blood pressure gained in a split second. But she did reciprocate, after a moment, moving her hand so his fingers intertwined with hers. 

Neither moved, neither spoke nor opened their eyes. And finally, both fell asleep until Liebgott woke them up a couple of hours later.

He opened the door loudly, letting in some light. Both Hannah and Chuck sat up quickly, startled and disheveled, looking at Joe like he was crazy. 

Joe looked at both with a deep, playful smirk before saying, “We have the meeting at CP in ten minutes, let’s go, come on.”

Thankfully, Joe didn’t notice that Hannah and Chuck were still holding hands under the sheet; but when they caught it, as Lieb left, they quickly unwrapped them and rushed to get their things, without saying another word to each other.

///

Night came around nicely. 

Both Hannah and Chuck were enjoying their time. Hannah had clearly relaxed, mostly after they had talked about what happened to the NCO, feeling like she had let go of a heavy weight she carried on her shoulders. 

Charles offered for her to stay for dinner when the brunette said she still had to walk her dog, even though she knew Angelina had probably done that already. He insisted, saying the leftovers taste even better reheated on the grill. 

Hannah laughed and agreed to stay, as long as she could help with it. Her day has been better than expected, way better. But she still had that small pebble in her shoe about her feelings towards Chuck. A part of her yelled that she should come clean to him, and be done with it, no matter the result. The other part also yelled that his friendship was more valuable than risking it for something more.

But the tiny voice in her head still insisted with No, no! He doesn’t feel that way. He hasn’t flirted with you, or showed some clear sign of attraction, Hannah! Have dinner and pretend it’s all good. 

“Hey, can I ask you something? This might sound a bit weird,” Hannah said, with a sneaky smile while Chuck revamped the grill. The former NCO just nodded in response. “Why aren’t you married?” 

Chuck snorted, looking surprised and slightly offended. “Aren’t you the one that used to complain that women are always pressured to get married, and maybe they shouldn’t if they don't want to?” He asked, almost complaining. 

Hannah laughed and put her hands up in her defense.

“I don’t mean it like that, Charles Grant! I just… I’m surprised a man like you, who does all this, isn’t at least dating someone,” she clarified. 

“I didn’t say I wasn’t dating someone,” he replied, without looking at her.

There it is! So, that’s what it's like to get your heart punched, huh? 

“Oh, yeah, I mean—Of course, sorry–,” Hannah added, suddenly stumbling upon her words as she felt her hands shake slightly. 

Chuck snorted again, this time a hearty laugh escaping his lips. 

“I’m not Hannah, I’m not seeing anybody at the moment,” he added, smiling as he moved the charcoal around the grill. 

Hannah had a rush of anger suddenly, wanting to throw something at him and yell you fucking asshole, I’m in love with you, do not do that to me!!!

But she held herself in, looking rather unphased, and just nodded disapprovingly. 

“I, well… I haven’t met the right woman, you know? I’ve seen some people, yeah. Babe set me up once with this redhead who could’ve been Malarkey’s sister for all I knew and it was going good at first but… Fuck, I was so bored!” he said, showing the annoyance in his face at the memory. “She was nice and all, but she was just… so fucking boring. She talked about her hair and stuff she does with her lady friends and she hated when I told stories about the war.”

Now it was Hannah’s turn to laugh. “She hated it? Why?”. 

“Who the fuck knows, maybe it was too g—ory for her, or she didn’t want to hear that one of the men was being called ‘Gonorrhea’. Hell, she didn’t even want to hear how I got the scar in my head or rather, the explanation of my slurring when I speak and my lack of strength on my left side,” Chuck said and sounded rather offended. 

“Someone has to either appreciate your scar and the sequels, or get the fuck out of your way,” Hannah said, approaching him with a beer in hand. “Don’t ever feel ashamed for that, Chuck, I’m not ashamed of having one ear, honestly. I think it’s pretty nice. Who can say that is different when their bodies are complete and in perfect state?”. 

“It’s boring, isn’t it?” he added.

“You and me, Chuck, are different. And that’s good. Toye and Guarnere have one less leg each, they’re fucking awesome too.” 

Hannah’s heart leaped at the sight of Chuck looking suddenly proud of himself, and when he looked at her to clink their bottles, she could’ve sworn that, if she had the ovaries, she would’ve kissed him right there and then.

///

After dinner and a few more laughs, Hannah called it a night. 

Her heart felt slightly heavy for not having dared to confess what she was there to do in the first place. 

“Well, my dear Grant, I have to head home,” she said, as she put plates down the water in sink. 

“Already?” Chuck replied, looking surprised.

“It’s almost ten in the night!” she exclaimed, drying her hands on a towel that hung from the oven door handle. 

“Want me to call you a cab? Lieb is probably still around working with his.” 

“No, don’t worry, I’ll walk. It’s fine,” Hannah replied, and started walking towards the door with Chuck on tow. 

Both stood on the porch, looking around the calm neighborhood. Hannah was feeling so ashamed of herself, slapping herself mentally every second that passed. 

“Well, Hannah, this was a great surprise,” Chuck started, breaking her thoughts for a moment, “we should do this more often, maybe with the guys, sometime, before winter leaves us secluded in our homes.” 

“Of course, but let’s not wait two years this time,” she replied, with a smile creeping up her lips, looking at him. God, how can someone dare be this good looking?

Chuck proceeded to hug her like when he opened the door past noon, when she showed up at his doorstep. Hannah reciprocated, and drowned herself once again in his cologne, not wanting to let go or stop feeling his hands around her body.

“See ya, Davis,” Chuck said as she walked down the steps and she took one last look at him before heading home. 

You fucking wuss, you fucking wuss, you fucking wuss, you fucking, pathetic     w—

“Hannah! Wait!” 

Chuck’s voice startled her as she was reaching the crossroad, when she turned around to find him running towards her. 

Her heart raced, wondering why the hell was he yelling at her for. Maybe she had forgotten something. Yeah, that’s all, I might have forgotten my… keys? 

“Hannah, wait, I… I have to tell you something and this can’t wait…” Chuck started as soon as he caught up to her. “Listen, this might sound weird but… a while ago I—you appeared in a dream of mine. You were talking to me after I got shot and you were begging me to not forget you.”

“Hannah, I took it upon myself to find you but I was meeting only dead ends, the Army wouldn’t help me so I had to… fuck, I had to find Winters and ask him for your information. God, that was embarrassing, but you know Winters, he didn’t hesitate to help. I had your address and phone numbers for months, but I never had the guts to go knock on your door… I thought you might have forgotten me, but… I never forgot about you,”

“I never forgot how we shared a foxhole during our hardest time. I never forgot how we slept in that bed and held hands in the dark. I never forgot how you took care of me when I had that one panic attack in Bastogne, and everything else,”

“What I mean, Hannah, is… I love you. I can’t date other women because they’re not you, and all I want is you. So… please, don’t leave. Not now. I couldn’t believe my eyes when you showed up at my door, fuck, I thought I was dreaming or dead. You had found me and I—,”

Before Chuck could follow through with his speech, Hannah took him by the face and kissed him. 

It was bruising, it was desperate and filled with love. Chuck wrapped his arms around her body, bringing her impossibly close to his body as her fingers found his hair. 

The anticipation was their favorite feeling. They both sensed how long they waited for that to happen, so they sank deeper into it. 

It went on for a few minutes, the night time seemed to have stopped for both, like everything had disappeared except for them. 

After they parted, both panting, their foreheads connected, Hannah opened her eyes and found Chuck’s cheeks stained with tear trails and that explained the salty taste in his lips. That made her smile widely as she still held his hand between hers. 

“Can you—do you want to s–spend the night with me?” Chuck asked, opening his eyes finally. 

Hannah just smiled widely, pecking his lips as she pulled him by the wrist towards his house.

///

Making love to someone you have craved for years makes the hours longer.

Both Hannah and Chuck were sure of that while the latter moaned loudly as Hannah rode him; his hands were bruising against her hips as she moved, holding herself in his shoulders, kissing him every now and again. 

Hannah never thought she would see Chuck like this. With sweat rolling down his forehead, his lips swollen and his eyes squeezed shut; to see his naked torso and his chest heaving up and down, which was covered in different scars that only made him even better looking in her opinion.

The man was almost ethereal in the dim light of his bedroom.

She enjoyed every bit of him as much as she could, like that could’ve been a fleeting figment of her imagination that she had to hold tight between her fingers before it could slip away. 

But reality brought her back when she felt the pain of his fingers digging into her hips. Hannah didn’t mind one bit.

She just loved to see how overwhelmed with pleasure he was, how he propped himself into his elbows, wrapping a hand around her bottom to carry both into the bed frame so he could sit and find her lips with his as he rode into his climax. 

Of course, Chuck being the gentleman he was, caring, he helped Hannah ride into hers, enjoying how she cried out his name loudly like it was the best song he had ever heard. 

///

Chuck’s fingers ran down Hannah’s bare shoulders, enjoying the dampness. It was soft, it was warm and it also a tad bit freckled. His fingertips followed down her arm until they met her face, that laid upon the back of her hands as she laid in her stomach. 

 Her eyes were closed but she was still awake. Hannah was just soaking on everything that happened through the day, and now, through the night, as the clock ticked into two in the morning. 

Chuck sat parallel to her, and his fingertips went all the way back to walk down her shoulder blades, into the deep line of her spine, meeting a few moles spread out here and there, which sent very slight tickles to the brunette. 

“I kind of can’t believe this just happened” he muttered, turning to lay his head on the small of her back. He could feel the vibration of the small laugh she let go at his comment.

“Me neither, Chuck… but I, uh… I have a confession, which I think will make you laugh,” Hannah replied.

“Do go on…” he replied.

“You told me you looked for my information with Winters, right?” Hannah asked.

“Right”.

“Well, when I looked for you too… I did the same,” she said and felt his head suddenly turn to her at her words, “and when I said your name, he gave me a weird look, but now I know it was a ‘I know something important about this that you don’t know’ look”. 

“So, wait, we l—ooked for each other in the past few months, and we did exactly the same shit?” he said, struggling slightly. 

Hannah heard the clicker of the lighter and looked back at him, lightning a cigarette with a shit eating grin sprawled upon his lips. 

“Exactly what I’m saying,” she replied, laying her head back down. 

“Another reason why I would like to marry you, then,” he added, like it was nothing.

What he didn’t notice was the speed in which Hannah’s eyes widened and her heart started thumping inside her rib cage. 

“I’m sorry?!” she asked, sounding a tad bit anxious. Chuck was never one to say rushed things like that. 

“The first reason is how powerful and relentless you were and still clearly are. You know how I know that?” he asked, and she could feel his smile still in his lips.

“No, how?”

“When you confronted Sobel before we went to Holland. Of course, I didn’t know at the moment the amount of feelings I had for you, but… I think I did have some of them roaming inside me,” Chuck said, like he was the one who stood up to Herbert Sobel, “but that was just plain hot,” he finalized, and turned to look at her; Hannah was just looking at him like he was crazy. 

The night before, everyone was cheering for their job. They were done, they were bound to the States and all the Easy Company wanted to do was drink and laugh. 

For everyone’s demise, Lipton announced how they were heading back into war, to Holland, killing the mood instantly. 

As the replacements were getting helped and guided by Bull, rather than Cobb, who could only brag about stuff he never ever did; Chuck was packing her stuff near Malarkey, Bill and Hannah. 

“I swear I thought by this time I was gonna be home, with a hundred in my pocket, flowers for my mama and nearing Christmas with my nieces and nephews” Malarkey said, fixing his bayonet. The rest scoffed, still bitter by the news.

“I miss the coffee from hometown, there’s this beautiful place in Hamstown Square, it’s very small and cozy, and the pastries are the most delicious I’ve ever had” Hannah said, looking like she was talking about the love of her life. 

“Guys, look!” Bull said, interrupting them, pointing to their right.

On a jeep, carrying some stuff behind it, sat Herbert Sobel, their former CO, the nightmare that trained them back in Toccoa. Hannah knew she didn’t train with him as much as the rest, but a year with that man was more than enough. 

“Fuck, no…” Hannah whispered so just the boys around her heard her “No, not him”.

“Don’t—Pretend he’s not here,” Malarkey said to her, tying the loose ends of her parachute to her shoulders as Skip came to them scowling like the rest. “Y’all too, do not look at him”. 

Neither obliged, all of them stared at the man passing by. 

“The hell is he doing here?” Skip wondered, without getting an answer.

Sobel walked in a straight line near the men as the truck behind his jeep unloaded, looking between the men with his usual air of superiority untouched. 

Unlucky for Hannah, he had met her eyes not too long after, and the man approached her, before the rest could make themselves scarce. 

“Still alive, uh… Davis?” Sobel asked, scowling at the brunette.

“Pretty much, sir. Still teaching at that school… somewhere?” she answered, provoking a few small gasps around her. Sobel scowl just deepened.

“Do not disrespect me with that tone, private” the taller man threatened, his jaw clenching tight. 

“Earn the respect, like you once taught us, and I won’t,” Hannah replied, her tone dripping with bitterness and irony. She felt a hand in her shoulder and knew one of the men was probably trying to calm her down. “You came here and act surprised that I’m still alive? No, I deserve more than that, sir”. 

“You shut your mouth right now, private! This—this is the reason why women shouldn’t be allowed in the army; they’re too emotional!” Sobel exclaimed, almost yelling to get attention, which only made Hannah even more furious.

“If you were in our command, if you were our leader, we would all be dead right now. Don’t you remember that drill we did back in England? Why do you think you were ‘promoted’? And no, I’m not scared of you, go write me up if you want to; Winters is south of the camp, third tent on the right. Colonel Sink is in the next tent to his, the fourth one,” Hannah felt like she couldn’t stop, her anger overcoming her; mountains of words and feelings that were accumulating, finally leaving her chest. 

Chuck couldn’t believe the words that came out of her. 

Everyone awaited without breathing for an answer, a yell from Sobel, something. But nothing came, he just scowled, breathed hard, and before anyone took a breath again, he turned around tight in his heel and left to the back of the truck. 

Hannah took a breath and turned around to finish prepping, when she found many of her fellow paratroopers smiling at her, some nodding in approval even. Johnny Martin crossed by her side, squeezing her arm, as he whispered a small “good one” for her. 

“I fucking hate him, that felt really good”, she said to Chuck, turning to adjust his jumpsuit. 

Chuck just stared at her, feeling hard to believe what just went through. Their former NCO was just bashed in front of everyone, and no one, not even one paratrooper came in his defense. 

His eyes roamed through her face as she fixed his suit and talked about something he wasn’t paying attention to. Suddenly, he was looking at her in a different way, one that would grow over time during the war.

///

The night caught up to Chuck and Hannah, both deep asleep on his bed. The brunette laid her head in his shoulder, on her side, while he was laid in his back, with his cheek against her forehead. 

Though around dawn, Chuck’s body started to shook. It came softly at first, just a few twitches, until it became a whole storm inside him. 

Hannah stirred up and saw how every muscle in his arms and chest were clenched, and he muttering something she couldn’t comprehend. Clearly, he was having a nightmares. The nightmares that seemed to never end, which felt like a punishment that everyone had to endure post war. 

The brunette placed her hands around his head as she whispered, “Chuck, Chuck, it’s okay, it’s just a dream, wake up, love, wake up.” 

His eyes shot open, looking terrified as he gasped for air, his hands fumbling to find her. 

“Hannah, Hannah!” He exclaimed, as he finally met her eyes. His body was shaking until he realized she was there, looking down at him, with a tired, disheveled smile. 

“It’s okay, love, I’m here, I’m here,” she replied, running her fingers through his hair, kissing his cheek before looking down at him again. 

The first light of the sun shining through the white curtains, illuminating both with such warmth it made Hannah’s heart swell. 

“I’m sorry, I’m s—sorry, Hannah, this still happens…” he explains, his hand tight on her side. 

But Hannah just smiles sweetly at him, “it still happens to me too, Chuck, it’s okay, there’s nothing to be sorry about,” she explains, admiring his deep blue eyes. 

“Can you… can you sing to me?” He asked, sounding almost embarrassed to ask for it. 

The touch of your lips upon my face

Your lips that are cool and sweet

Such tenderness lies in their soft caress

My heart forgets to beat

The touch of your hands upon my head

The love in your eyes, ashine

And now at last, the moment divine

The touch of your lips, the love in your eyes

The touch of your lips on mine

Chuck closed his eyes as her singing filled his ears. He haven’t felt peace like at that moment, not since the war. Hugging his mother, playing cards with his brothers or the men from the Company brought joy, but peace; peace came from Hannah, wearing his shirt, at dawn, singing to him. 

And it was the same for Hannah. 

Both knew the nightmares will continue to haunt them, and that their lives will go on, but at least, they were going to go through it together. 

And that was more than enough for them. ///

[whiterbone-a]

i wanna know what your take on the nanami / gojo relationship is ?? cause a big part of me is like nanami isn't someone who really talks , like you won't get inside of him and he'll make jokes here and there with the whole work is shit thing . but i think he lost his heart and happiness alongside yuu and i think he even said this wasn't a mission first years should be on and the fact that yuu looked up to getou and gojo so much and still got killed was like a fucking blade to the stomach.

i mean do you think there is a romantic possability , i do play around with it but at the same time do you think it would be comforting ?? like i know the big ship is gojo and getou because of how close they were but what is nanami to gojo , a tool and a function or a friend and possible lover ??? and how will his death effect him ???

also were gojo actively smiles , nanami only smiles when death is around the corner and i am like red flags here and there . but sorry this got so long and please feel free to ignore it .

hello and welcome.  take a seat and thank you for joining me.  if this doesnt make sense just pretend u know what im talking about, its the adhd for making my thoughts so scattered everywhere

so in concept the nanami and gojou ship in a romantic concept is rly cute in concept like u have an ex - salary man whos serious doesnt allow himself the luxury of acting his age but on the other end u have someone who still acts like hes a child and never takes anything serious even when hes fighting.  they both endured the trauma being a jujutsu sorcerer entails yet they have nothing in common -- gojou dresses like hes a reflection with the moon and nanami, the sun.  also the fact that gojou thinks that he, himself, is ascended above all he works with while nanami is just a human living his day to day, and lot of ppl use this as nanami to bring down gojou to his morality just like a nudge or a friendly reminder.  he even tolerates and puts up with him a lot more than he should.  hes very patient but very honest.  a lot of the fanart of them is SO CUTE esp when theyre married and living happily with one another.  i even ship them, its actually one of my top ships next to satosugu but like in reality its not so great unfortunately

honestly?  theres a small slim of a possibility but due to the nature of the clash of personalities and what their job its like ... not rly possible

nanami, even out of being a salary man, fully treats being a jujutsu sorcerer as a 9 - 5 job and refuses to work overtime. he has small luxuries like he enjoys reading and eating left overs after a day of working hard like who wouldnt and not to mention hes the type to keep his relationships strictly professional. gojou has probably asked him several times to take him out for drinks after work (altho work never ends with gojou which is ironic) and has said no.  it’s funny now that i think about it,  shouko probably asks him for an occasional drink after hours and he accepts because at least he likes shouko and he knows theres no ulterior motive from her just a couple of coworkers doing some heavy drinking but nothing ever more than that -- hes even said that he wants to get married but when hes no longer a sorcerer

sucks tho, because like everyone else, nanami sees gojou as someone who is extremely powerful and only sees him for his techniques except more like hes a nuisance and extremely annoying, even to the point of having absolutely no respect for him.  he realizes, yeah hes strong but as for the full package that is satoru gojou?  there’s absolutely nothing to respect about that man

and while we’re talking about gojou, i’ll say it, he’s mentally unstable.  i mean, we all knew that -- hes got a couple of “screws loose” as he puts it inside that rattling brain of his.  on the opposite side of the spectrum, hes not capable of handling a romantic relationship.  hes always always busy, its rare that that he gets a breather for himself.  hes always being sent out on missions out of country and ive always portrayed gojou as the type of partner thats not even gentle on his partners in terms of being playful, childish, and being a nuisance.  his mental health is absolutely terrible (i’m not saying nanamis is any better but) hes always acted much younger than what he is altho i do blame his upbringing for that.

and gojou treats everyone as good friends but does like to particularly pick on ppl who take themselves too seriously (nanami and utahime), mei mei and yuki are exempt from this.  he also doesnt rly care for ichiji but like, that doesnt matter LOL.

i do see nanami eventually giving in for one (1) after dinner ‘date’ after work but when gojou is actually less himself, hes tolerable to be around which isnt saying much tbh.  you should def listen to the nanami and gojou drama audio if u can!  they’re so fucking funny as a pair, which solidifies them as being cute but were not talking about that rn.

in terms of being ‘what are they’ to each other, its hard to tell.  i talked about it briefly as nanami reminding him of his morality and being his humility tho gojou doesnt act like it, he fully believes hes above all and everyone, lovers and close friends are included in this.  i read a lot of nana/go fanfics and they portray nanami as someone to push down his ego;  to remind him hes actually Not all that great, a child in an adults body, etc.  he’s a brutality honest man and gojou can take critic and criticisms to his person but that doesnt mean hes going to listen (and he doesnt, hes even self aware that his personality sucks ass but does he bother to change?  absolutely not and he wont start now nor for anyone else).

yuu did definitely help nanami change and shift his ideas about the world, esp hating the jujutsu society afterwards.  like, i dont blame u king, it sucks ass.  tho, i dont think nanami looked up or cared for gojou and getou that much.  getou he looked up to more so because at least hes as a respectable guy, strong, good looking, and stimulates intellectual conversations.  gojou?  not so much.  nanami probably thought that it doesnt matter if u have techniques that is extremely rare to acquire and even more so to master but u suck ass and u dont stimulate joy to be around.

nanami is a good friend and high school buddy to gojou and nanami would definitely call him ‘coworker’ or something along those lines when hes annoyed him too much or doesnt want gojou to benefit too much from simple acknowledgement.  gojou thinks hes an ascended being but he definitely respects and finds nanami to be a strong sorcerer and was rather surprised when he took the 9 - 5 job but it was definitely safer.

death ... ah, i think about this all the time.  it’s like losing suguru all again except he didnt go rogue and kill a whole village.  hes absolutely confident in nanamis abilities to fend off curses and hes too stubborn to let himself die as well, so the idea of him dying doesnt ever cross his mind.  thats a true stab to the gut to hear that nanami has died, maybe a moment of truly being unhinged and a darker nature but we wont rly know until it happens in the manga, which i cant wait.  i mean, at least mei mei, utahime, and shouko are around but this is nanami were talking about.  if this was in terms of a romantic relationship rather than a simple seemingly one - sided friendship of enjoying of being around that person but that person just tolerating him and hoping he goes away eventually.  i can’t say, i can’t say!  just take these thoughts with like a grain of salt.

also that last statement in the ask, gojous smiles are fake and a mask while the rare times nanami does smile, its genuine.

regardless of what i said, i think it can be a comfy ship!  this ship isnt toxic but any means (unless u make it toxic then well, thats a you thing) so just enjoy it!  i know i do i think as long as u recognize that maybe neither of them being a relationship would benefit the other then go stupid go crazy, i know i will.

[mousehole5000]

tgcf chapters 107 - 120 this is one where i give some Opinions. i do overall like hualian a lot but i have some quibbles

wait why am i still taking screenshots? i can copy/paste again afskldfjasad

It really was hard to tell whether people would feel happy after watching such performances. However, in truth, slaughter and the sight of blood did create excitement in people. Whether or not there was fear, after the initial shock was over, a rush of adrenaline would be produced in the heart- me watching horror movies

“Shi Qingxuan said. “Then, Your Highness, Crimson Rain Sought Flower! I order you to—to immediately strip each other’s clothing!” - djslkadjlsd WHY DID HE SPECIFICALLY SAY THEY HAD TO STRIP EACH OTHER THISALSKDJ is this a normal thing is it a wingman attempt what is happening

“I’ll tell you what it is,” he said softly. “To watch with your own eyes your beloved be trampled and ridiculed, yet be unable to do anything. That’s the worst suffering in the world.” ... “Ming Yi asked, “What’s the biggest regret of your life?”- when truth or dare gets a bit too real

On the side, Hua Cheng was still only observing, and was already bored to the point where he’d changed back into his red robes. Then he changed to black robes again. Then to white robes. Almost every time Xie Lian looked back, he would be donning a different appearance, and with every new look there were different hairstyles, and different accessories, and different boots, and so on; sometimes playful, sometimes elegant, sometimes deadly, sometimes glamourous. Xie Lian was growing dizzy from all the colours and kept looking back, unable to look away. - THIS ISNT THE TIME HUA CHENG. YOURE PRIMPING. THE WINDMASTER HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED AND YOURE PRIMPING

obsessed with xie lian not being able to figure out to use the windmaster’s fan and just. using it to SMACK

also windmaster??? whats going on??? :( i know some things from spoilers like who is not to be trusted but i really have no clue whats happening rn

anyways back to puqi shrine lets check on those kids also can we PLEASE get some funds for this restoration smh. hua cheng and xie lian doing mundane hard labor together to fulfill prayers.... :pleading:

jailbreak in the heavens 2: dig a tunnel

Sure enough, the moment Ming Yi put pressure on his shovel, a hole opened up before them. With the shovel raised, he burrowed crazily ahead while Shi Qingxuan, in the middle, cheered him on crazily. As the only non-crazy person, Xie Lian brought up the rear. That treasured shovel of the Earth Master was indeed magical, and with only a few strokes, a new tunnel of over ten meters was dug. - anybody remember mulch diggums from the artemis fowl series? this is much more dignified than that but i think this is only the second time ive read a character just starting digging a tunnel as a plot point

okay so much is going on i wish i hadnt spoiled who certain characters actually are for myself but i have no one to blame but me for a) not blacklisting spoilers at all and b) just having a little freefall through the tags. oh well. anyway heavenly college admissions scandal except way worse. the corruption extends to the heavens and the windmaster is having a very bad day

i guess we’re having a high seas adventure now?

im gonna keep it real im getting tired of how often we get told how handsome hua cheng is. i know its all xie lian’s pov and while im not terribly familiar with it i know what genre we’re working with and im assuming thats pretty typical. its something i dont much care for in general and idk maybe it sounds better in the original but ngl its starting to make me roll my eyes. love you goth king but god okay we get it.

i guess what i will say about hualian so far is that overall i like them and i like how they interact in general they have a lot of nice moments and they just genuinely seem to like each other which is really nice to see EXCEPT for when it actually comes to things that could be romantic or sexual which is a shame bc i dont think it has to be like this. again disclaimer that im only reading a translation and dont know everything might not have all the knowledge necessary to accurately criticize etc etc and im assuming a lot of this is expected from the genre (disclaimer to this disclaimer that i cant say that for sure its just based on things ive picked up about the bl genre over the years) but idk like xie lian was so distressed after their underwater kiss scene. it was kind of uncomfortable to read and maybe im being unfair i know his cultivation is based around abstinence or whatever but idk i dont care for it. and that scene alone doesnt have to be a bad thing like idk i guess its his first kiss ever (?) and it would make sense if he feels weird about it but i just have my doubts thats going to be addressed or resolved in a satisfying way. also im like. dude everyone is like centuries old. xie lian’s been on earth for 800 years. has he really never met or heard of a gay person during all this time? maybe he hasnt idk what he got up to yet maybe that’s actually a thing. also same thing with the reactions from the immortals to xie lian in a dress and characters like the windmaster like again you’re all centuries old and its not uncommon to be able to just completely change gender presentation. why are you all weird about a man wearing a woman’s dress? i just feel like that shouldnt be a big deal to these characters idk

also again not going to lie part of this that im not really a big fan of reading romance in general. yes i am reading this book. yes i do read and write a lot of fanfic that includes or centers romance. im multifaceted. but really what im talking about is the like physical side of it and descriptions im extremely picky about it. ill give an example. early on in the torture pit (or whatever it was called i cant remember lol) when xie lian kind of accidentally felt up hua cheng in the dark when he was being carried. i dont think thats a bad thing to have happen between the two romantic leads i think thats fine and good to include that early but i just did not enjoy reading it when it happened idk maybe it was the wording and i do think that moments like these work better in a visual medium. ive definitely read het romance that reads like this and i wasnt a fan of that either lol same with fanfic i get tired when writers go on and on about how hot one characters finds another character. this isnt a huge criticism of it like i said im picky but again like with the way that hua cheng is described it just makes me roll my eyes sorry kings

okay back to the reading. this whole saving the fishermen thing feels like a big set up for something narrative-wise. hua cheng specifically insisted on coming and i know one of the characters involved ends up dying im wondering if thats now it would be a good time tbh if things get just a bit too unfortunate during this heavenly calamity... and the brothers are notably not having a harmonious time... also tho it feels very likely we’ll just have another Hualian Moment (tm)

In such a situation, Pei Ming still acted the same. In the evening, when they rescued a few fishermen girls, so scared their eyes were blurry from tears, he held them in his embrace and soothed them with a gentle voice; a true show of honeyed romance, affectionate and charming. - pei ming please get pickled again.

also its funny that hua cheng is just kinda hanging out and everyone else just has to deal with it

Looking down from above, the entire area was painted in a terrifying black. It was easy to see the collision between the two different-coloured currents. Their fierce battle was what formed this enormous whirlpool. As the eye swallowed the ship whole, the two currents of water separated. However, the battle was far from over. Like two venomous vipers, they continued to snap at each other. Each collision was followed by a mountain of angry waves. - this pretty dope ngl. also love our wind and earth masters just chilling on a shovel i dig it. hehe

Yet, other than discovering Hua Cheng had a fine body, there were no other finds. Xie Lian was at his wit’s end and started to worry. - okay see this one’s funny im just also irritated bc im like WE KNOW!!! WE GET IT HE’S HOT AND XIE LIAN THINKS HE’S HOT OKAY GOT IT

okay kiss #2 again its not the kisses themselves its xie lian’s reaction it just bothers me idk im not saying i need him to be super into it and completely unconflicted about it rn but he’s just so freaked out about it and idk i just dont really like it just feels weird i dont care for that aspect of it. also dude hua cheng is a ghost and he did this exact same thing for you before just chill. i wish instead of xie lian literally running away while screaming that hes sorry he was just like “oh haha youre fine thats cool im gonna go look around the woods i dont feel weird about this at all haha” like idk its kind of funny but when its literally our two romantic leads i just feel like its confusing like it kind of makes me feel like they shouldnt be together if one of them freaks out this much again considering the fact that they are both CENTURIES old. i know i know xie lian is an 800 year old virgin but. he hasn’t been like this about anything else so yeah idk like it still could have been awkward and funny i just dont think it needed to be so :/ that being said it was funny that xie lian was then internally like “oh i did it wrong? perhaps i should ask him for more.. instructions....” if that actually happens i might like it bc it would complete this little watery theme

Before he finished, he immediately remembered. Coffin wood. There were trees here everywhere; and a deceased? There was one right before his eyes. Sure enough, Hua Cheng smiled. “Won’t it be fine once I lie inside? - love that hua cheng just sat on the fact that he can turn anything into a coffin. that would have been really useful information earlier but no he just waited until everyone but xie lian was gone afjaklsdjf

also i do think that oblivious xie lian thinking “wow whoever it is that hua cheng fancies is an idiot for not liking him back theyre totally taking him for granted :/” is kind of funny and sweet. actually the whole conversation they have at the campfire is good and im bookmarking it to think about later

“...You on top and me on the bottom,” Xie Lian replied. “Isn’t top and bottom the same?” Hua Cheng asked. - okay im sorry but. mood whenever theres discourse about top/bottom dynamics for a ship im just like jesus christ i dont care. tbh i rarely read fanfiction if its just sexual and ngl if i see a fic specifically tag characters as top or bottom i wont read it lmfao. especially when people have really strong opinions about this stuff when theres nothing canonical to back it up like headcanon all you want but whenever i see people argue about it im just like no offense but go work out your own sexual issues and dynamics instead of arguing with strangers on the internet about who’s a top and who’s a bottom. sorry to be mean but just thats how i feel lol

this was mostly a ramble with a few excerpts but im getting sleepy im going to TRY to take a break from this for like a day but we’ll see how that goes i do very much want to know what happens. anyway if you read this whole thing hiiiiii sorry for subjecting you to my opinions on top/bottom discourse

[oh-mother-of-darkness]

asks (26)

@spickerzocker​ said:

hey there! just a heads up that i tried to click on the "why i don't ship" explanation link in your faq and it says that there is no post with that url/it's generally broken. also your "a conversation about recovery" thing is beautiful and hurts in the best way and i love it. have a nice day!

Yes, I intentionally took that link down awhile ago, and last night I went and updated some of the tabs on my blog. Here are my basic thoughts:

I wrote that link years and years ago, while I was first navigating the internet and while I was still figuring out important things about my own identity and opinions. I ran my blog differently back then, but by the end of the first few months, I knew I was uncomfortable with shipping. 

As people began to interact with me and my work, I told them over and over again no, I don’t want to talk about that, and I don’t want to write about it, and it makes me uncomfortable. I don’t think that was a common position to take at the time, so it wasn’t what people expected from me. 

During those years, I felt like I had to justify myself and give a valid explanation. I wrote that post explaining why I had that boundary, and I put it in a place where anyone could find it.

I said no when people asked, let them make jokes about it, and made jokes about it myself in response. As time went on I got more and more exasperated when I had to repeat myself. I wrote definite rules into my ask box, request tab, and FAQ. People still asked. I wrote it into my description. People still asked. 

The truth is yeah, there’s a pretty simple explanation for my discomfort. It makes sense. It’s easy to understand, and most folks think it’s a “good enough” reason to leave me alone. The difference between young-me and current-me is that I no longer feel the need to justify myself. 

None of y’all need to know why I set the boundaries that I set. My explanation isn’t relevant, and I’m not obligated to give it. I said no. That’s enough. 

I think a good number of folks remember my explanation from the past, and I don’t mind that at all. There may be a time where I talk about it again, in a more appropriate context, so I guess we’ll see.

That’s a lot of information in response to a very helpful ask. Thanks! The link is gone now, and I’m so pleased that you enjoyed the fic :)

------

Anonymous said:

U suck

Kenza sent this anon as a joke. She’s right, and I thank her. 

------

Anonymous said:

I'm a doctor and ive seen it all.....but the milk fic made me gag

Excellent

------

@wingedskyes said:

Ah. Wait. I wasn't on anon....uhm. oh well. It's fine. I like milk and am not ashamed. 😆

I don’t think I received another message from you actually, but I too like milk and I’m glad we’re on the same page

------

@thelittleredheadedmusician said:

To add to the milk discussions: my best friend from home and best friend from college have each finished a gallon a milk by themselves within 2 days.

I do that too, every once in awhile. When the milk craving hits it’s a gallon a day

------

Anonymous said:

"TIM! POUR HIM. A GLASS OF M A L K!"

Hold on I have to google some things

Yeah this is funny

------

Anonymous said:

I have read that milk fic three separate times and every time I’m laughing just as hard as Tim and dick by the end it’s just so excellently executed and builds so perfectly that by the time dick cracks I’m ready to go too and I just lose it it’s amazing I love it

Awww anon I’m so pleased :)

------

@the-smartass-under-the-mountain said:

Just wanted to drop by and say your recent fic with Tim antagonizing Damian with increasingly outrageous milk concoctions had me giggling. It was so cute and refreshing to see Dick enjoying Tim's little prank. And Bruce's reaction to just... walk away was fantastic!

Thank you! I’m always so thrilled when y’all think the jokes hit

------

@njtheboywonder​ said:

I havnt really enjoyed a fic in years, but i stopped to read ur fanfic with tim drinking milk just to fuck w dami amd it made me smile. Thanks, for writing it.

Oh that warms my heart <3

------

@bruciewayneisbatman​ said:

Tim Is totally the guy who would drink ridiculous amounts of dalgona coffee to annoy damian, according to that fic.

Had to google that one, but I guess so huh

------

Anonymous said:

(diff anon) but that birthday fic was so good oml and you have opened my eyes as to the batfam in quarantine this is such a Concept

We’re all here dying..... together...

------

Anonymous said:

Happy birthday! 🎉 or belated! 🎂 thank you for being in the fandom. 😊

&

Anonymous said:

To anon! Sorry. I forgot to add that! Anyway, thanks to them we get a lovely fic. I hope you have many more birthdays! 😊

Message for you anon

------

Anonymous said:

Your writing gives off good vibes

Hear that guys I “passed my vibe check.” Is that what the youth say these days? I am an elder now and I do not know

------

Anonymous said:

finding your blog while being relatively new to batman fandom is such a bliss. your batfam content especially is *chef's kiss* amazing.

Thank you my darling :) I’m glad you’re here

------

Anonymous said:

Best line in a fic? Hard to pick just one, but this particular one from "Just Desserts" by fyeahbatmanandrobin on Tumblr is one of my faves: “Anyone else would be hard-pressed to provide the particular brand of excitement you bring to my life, Dami.”

&

@noisypaintersong​ said:

For the line thing: "I don't doubt it. Bruce Wayne, the unexpectedly normal guy wrapped in a mystery wrapped in a superhero wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a fake socialite wrapped in a businessman wrapped in a secretive billionaire." He paused. "…You're the seven-layer burrito of Gotham," he pondered. - Barry to Bruce in 'Of Friends and Foes' by Paganpunk2 on FFN. It's one of the funniest things I've read someone say to Bruce LOL

& 

@kirakats​ submitted:

&

Anonymous said:

“I do know that according to everyone else, there is no chance, no future, no universe where I stay a hero.” Describes my frustration with the way DC treats Damian so accurately. Let the kid be a hero dammit.

Thanks! That’s really helpful. I’ve got a decent answer to my question now. 

@kurawastaken​ submitted:

So this is Kenza retaliating against me for the milk fic. I very much hate tomatoes and specifically ketchup. This photo (1) is a nightmare and (2) fulfills its intended purpose.

------

Anonymous said:

I love your blog!!!

And I love you 

------

Anonymous said:

quick question: how do you think jason reconciles with the fam?? i think in the comics they kinda just reboot and now he’s on better terms. but like what conversations happened, yknow??? (you’re doin great work by the way, it rips out my heart but it’s great)

This is an amazing question, and I’ll be thinking about it for the next bit, I think. That would be a really interesting topic to explore in depth

------

@angel-gidget​ said:

*hugs you real tight* would you please send this to the first 10 people in your dash? Make sure someone gets a hug today and stay safe!

Oh thank you for the hug <3

------

Anonymous said:

I hadn’t been aware of that Memphis petition, but I live in Memphis too (Altho I know you said you just grew up there so you may not be living here currently haha) so ig I just wanted to say thanks for bringing it to my attention!

!!!

I’ve been in Texas for six years now, ever since I started school, but I’m still in and out of Memphis for family purposes. Love the trash heap of my birth 

------

@damianwaynerocks​ said:

hey! any chance you know of any other dc heroes around damian’s age?

Sure! You could try Billy Batson, Jon Kent, or Maya Ducard

------

Anonymous said:

hi! i don't know if it's okay to leave anons like these but ive been feeling down because my country has passed a bill that deprives us of lots of human rights freedom and i want you to know that i just found your blog through the damian/bruce + justice fic and it comforted me. im slowly going thru your works and so far they are all comforting. i love your stuff, thank you.

Philippines? I’ve heard some things, and I’m real sorry y’all’re going through that. I don’t know that there’s anything I could say about that to help, but I hope you’re finding joy somewhere

------

@awesomeness-ofgaybitches​ said:

Tumblr hates you. The links in your bio and to your fic masterlist don't work on mobile. I'm sorry.

FUCK

[crowsent]

the man hasnt even started the stream yet and his chat is spammin “technolate” truly the best and most supportive fans

amazing

=

i have to make my own fences like a loser

=

“tommy is this your credit card? let me read the numbers aloud tommy”

=

“they keep dying on my thorns”

then fucking remove your armour mr technoblade??????????? you have the option to remove your armour

i know you have trust issues and that the last time you removed your armour tommy tried to kill you but like

you can remove your armour, find someplace else for your zombie villagers to be in, and then put the armour back on

you have options mr blade

you can make unenchanted armour for the purposes of moving your damn zomvillagers out the way if you really dont wanna be armourless

you have the materials

you have the opportunities

fucking seize them

=

mr blade: “my sleep schedule is terrible”

my dumb ass, waking up at 10pm on a monday after falling asleep on a 6am the same monday, after not sleeping for 2 days on sunday and saturday: “damn right your sleep schedule is terrible”

i have good self-awareness

=

mr blade: “im not stalling”

proceeds to stall:

• “happy new year! i forgot that happened”

• reads donations

• begins to try and cure his zombie villagers

• makes fun of skeppys “clickbait” title (it is clickbait by the way. the video is not structured like an actual manhunt vid. totally not a technosimp but techno was a fantastic hunter in the skeppy v techno manhunt. yep. techno was v fair about the entire thing go watch it if you havent hes great and skeppy was also there /lh)

• talks about chess

• talks about the Gifted Child™ Syndrome without ever saying the words Gifted Child™ Syndrome

• DONT DISRESPECT CHESS

(hes a fucking athena kid. im fucking TELLING YALL HES AN ATHENA KID and if i have to fucking write a goddamn academically cited paper to prove it with actual fucking receipts i goddamn will)

• even when tommy came on stream, techno immediately proceeded to discuss the Kings Fianchetto opening

• “i dont know what kind of science textbooks youve been reading, but youve spent too much money on them. those are trash. those are TRASH”

exactly mr blade. exactly. see? athena kid. hes smart. he went to college. he knows the score. mmmhmmm. yup. checks out mr. blade

• types “You’re talking sounds” -tommyinnit (genius)

• into the mc chat

• “Tommy, you’re talking words, but the only universal language: is sounds”

IF SBI NON CANON WHY THE FUCK DOES THIS READ AS AN OLDER BRO MAKING FUN OF HIS YOUNGER BRO EXPLAIN MR BLADE

Techno fucking lists out languages that do not have sounds like: sign language, written language, braille

and then fucking thomathy “tommyinnit” minecraft hits us with “and russian”

YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST FOLKS

RUSSIAN IS A CATEGORY OF NON-SOUND LANGUAGE

=

and for a good few minutes, mr blade and associate tommyinnit talk about crimes and the fbi and using it to farm views. big brain moved here today

(and then tommys alexa turned blue when he said fbi and then they both freaked out it was great)

=

new york-ian

=

mr blade and tommyinnit just IMMEDIATELY trying to pander to new yorkers once they realise the population size. they out here fucking complimenting the statue of liberty (even tho its in new jersey), the empire state building, the bronx, queens, fucking SPIDERMAN

if they arent brothers

why they have this energy

=

prime to tommyinnit

sub to technoblade

yall

my heart

i love these two terrorists so much

(for legal reasons, i am obligated to say that they are video game terrorists please and thank you)

=

tommy, about music he wanna sing: its from nintendo

mr blade: nintendo copyrights EVERYTHING tommy they got like SUPER COPYRIGHT

tommy: well, technoblade, every last one of my videos uses nintendo music

mr blade: DUDE YOURE GOING TO DIE. nintendo will KILL you

=

“new york is not canon in the dream smp universe”

mr technoblade over here just fucking ruining every new yorkers day huh

yall hear that? new york is non canon

=

you want cock to join the revolution

=

tommy out here trying to be intimidating but hes stuttering, knocking himself off of things...

its great

its great

i love their dynamic

=

im spawning the wither, somebody get me my sword

techno “one-liner” blade ladies and gentlemen

=

techno using the wither to vandalise lmanberg is very poggers of him

amazing mr blade

=

tommy is such a delight in this stream

“i dont know this man”

“why would you bring this near me im WEAK im FRAIL im LIKE AN OLD LADY”

thank you mr innit

=

if i had gotten this stream live yall bet your asses i would be chanting “blood for the blood god” with chat

chat is BLOODTHIRSTY

chat is feral

chat is amazing

thank you chat for being the chaotic fucking bastards yall always are

=

“lookit muh muscles. BITCH”

tommy

i love him

=

so last stream, techno and tommy waterboarded a hostage who died by a spider immediately after he was released

THIS stream, techno and tommy waterboard an orphan fox until he cries

good times

=

fundy drowned

ha

canon?

=

wait

i just remembered

FUNDY GOT DROWNED BY HIS UNCLES

TOMMY AND TECHNO ARE FUNDYS UNCLES BRUHHHHHHH

these two fuckers legit said “what if i waterboard my nephew to the point where he drowns”

=

i find it really funny that techno is the one fanon portrays to be this remorseless out of control entity when the entire time during the fundy waterboard torture, techno is the one holding tommy back and saying that hes going to far

and last time, techno is the one chiding philza when philza just casually murders and slaughters his way around the map

bruh

techno has more of a moral compass than fandom gives him credit for

where is my "techno is actually the moral compass of the sbi” fanfic

=

the only dirt we have on dream is his dirt shack amiright? eyyyy hes homeless

techno

techno

so funny

=

“useless, annoying, loud, british. you know. the worst combination” techno says

then he fucking makes tommy weapons, gives tommy the helmet, makes tommy weapons and tools and armour...

yeah. 

=

“i will not rest until that entire country has been completely obliterated for what it did to me and phil, tommy”

ME AND PHIL

ME AND PHIL

technoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

bruhhhh

mr blade please

=

LMANBURG IS MY UNFINISHED SYMPHONY

tommy what the fuck

what the fuck

tommy

tommy

what wait tahgjkjxbglsjbnouafsfv

WAT

=

“you could actually be, dare i say it, a friend” TECHNO

TECHNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

BRUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

=

“technoblade ill join you”

ANTARCTIC ANARCHIST COMMUNE POG

YES BITCH

YES BITCH

SBI

SBI

SBI

SBI

SBI

=

“this bodes poorly for the eventual sbi meetup”

shut up

shut the fuck up

i cant handle this

i can handle the dream sapnap meetup conspiracy

but i CANNOT handle the sbi meetup conspiracy

techno please shut up

i cant

dont do me dirty like this man

=

you know how tommy keeps saying that hes weak and shit but like

he fought in wars

he has fucking armour, weapons, potions, gapples

he can hold his own in a fight

do

do you think tommy keeps calling himself weak bc DREAM calls him weak? like. his self-confidence and belief in his abilities is just eroded by dream so tommy thinks hes weak even if he isnt?

=

“we have sand at home”

at home

at home

at HOME

bruhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

techno literally out here singlehandedly giving me serotonin

=

beak on

=

bless you

=

one of us

one of us

one of us

one of us

one of us

one of us

[bangtanxm]

Bookclub; March Highlight

This month’s theme was “The Darkness Within” asking for our bookclub members to find the most angstiest and darkest stories to recommend for this month. These are our our monthly fanfic recommendations from our bangtanxm; bookclub!

In the following you find a list of fics we recommend and reviewed this month. Please support these amazing authors! With every monthly recommendation, there is also a drabble game that everyone can participate in. You’ll find the masterlist at the end of the reviews. Happy Reading!

BOOKCLUB; recommendations

PS. As this theme involves a lot of triggering topics, we’d like to emphasize to thoroughly read the disclaimers on each story. Thank you.

TEMPTATION written by linzeigh

— Summary; Yoongi and Jimin are priests. Jin, Taehyung, and Jungkook are hungry. — Disclaimer; pwp, demons, nsfw-content

bookclub; review

“AAAAARRHHHHH. This was so incredible. I feel like no matter what I say, it will not do this masterpiece justice. It's so sinful and forbidden, but oh how it feels so right! The gradual revelation of Jimin and Yoongi’s mutual lust for each other was masterfully written. And fuck, I love the demon trio of Jin, JK and Tae. Their interactions and teasing brought a surprisingly bright mood to the fic, and I giggled several times at JK and Tae’s bickering. The concept of them feeding of sexual tension and being able to read Jimin and Yoongi’s mind was really interesting. The blasphemy was so shocking (and surprisingly intriguing), and I kept thinking damn how far is the author gonna take it, and oh lord very very far indeed. This is a must-read for anyone who likes explicit and dark fics!!” [@tinysweetscrown]

“This fic is so good. It is lengthy, for one, which is so admirable and amazing considering it’s largely smut. Smut can be so hard to write such big fics of and keep it fresh and interesting, but this author was able to do so. They were able to really take their time with each character and it felt fresh and interesting, without being slow or repetitive which is such an awesome accomplishment. I love the small details that were added in, the fact that they didn’t bleed, probably didn’t need to breathe, were super strong, etc. – it really added to the depth of the characters themselves, which is something that is often left out of smut fics. Also the entire subject/plot. Though blasphemous in some ways, it was handled really really well and I think kind of brushed on some very important topics (like being gay and religious). Overall just a stunning piece of fiction that I will be coming back to again and again for a reread.” [anon]

THE PERFECT ILLUSION written by @softjeon​ & @cassiavioletblue​

— Summary; He was the perfect illusion. The getaway for anyone who didn’t want to face reality. And yet, there was something in his eyes, something vulnerable and hopeful as if he was dying for someone to see through him, to care for him enough to look behind the mask and draw out the real Jimin. And Namjoon couldn’t wait to do exactly that. — Disclaimer; mentioning of abusive behavior

bookclub; review

“this is...just wow.... the story is so interesting and unique, the writing is beautiful, the characters are so on point. Ive only read the first chapter so far and i just know this is going to be one of my classics. The universe is so well constructed, the characters very nuanced in such a short amount of time... You can see the research that went into the geisha world, and it's paying off into what i feel is a masterpiece.” [anon]

"I already had an admiration and love for geisha culture and craft so seeing this story come out the first time just made me so excited!! Granted it has darker thematic tones to it, I loved how Jimins character was so well embodied that it stuck with me even after I read it. Also Jungkook as the maiko liSTEN I GREW SO PROTECTIVE OF HIM THROUGHOUT THE STORY. That build up of his mizuage made me want to take him away to somewhere and Namjoon and Yoongi were just the best, most complimentary characters to each of them. Jimin needed someone soft and kind like Namjoon while Jungkook needed someone sort of protective and a little cheeky like Yoongi. Their dynamics just worked so freaking well and you can always count on Jey and Cat to have just the right amount of angst mixed with fluff cause damn it HURT for a while reading this but the relief of it all was so welcoming. I can't rec this fic enough honestly, the characters, the settings in the teahouse are so beautiful and I LOVE authors who aren't scared to make a member into an antagonistic character cause it added so much flavour to the chemistry OOF just well done it was so nice reminiscing with this fic again!!!” [anon]

“I read The Perfect Illusion originally as it came out. It is just as enjoyable the second time through. It was such an interesting and stunning piece, I felt. The real shining star was the slow burn aspect of it, I think, even more so than the angst or abuse aspects. The slow sort of build of romance between Joon and Jimin was really beautiful, especially with the constant looming danger of what they were doing. The gravity of it was revealed in a really slow, measured manner that I think really helped the reader feel that sense of urgency as the fic went on and we – like Namjoon, learned more and more about the situation than we’d known before. The disgust of what was being done to Jimin and JK and the other dancers was enough to roll one’s stomach, but it was done in such a way that it worked well with the fic. It wasn’t there just for shock value; everything seemed to have a purpose and a point and it wove together in a really fitting and gorgeously heartbreaking and bittersweet tale overall.”  [anon] 

SING FOR ME written by Trilluvium

— Summary; When Jimin set out to find Earthshine in order to save his mother, he’d been ready to give up his life. Earthshine’s keeper, however, was interested in taking more from Jimin than just his life. — Disclaimer; non-con, tentacles, rape

bookclub; review

“Just wow. Okay, so this fic is so beautifully done. There is nonconsent, yes, it’s dark, yes, but it’s so much more than that. Particularly because of the ending, which is so bittersweet – Jimin’s choice. But my thinking is, vaguely hopeful? Maybe things will turn around? But that’s just me. Either way – the real shining star in this fic is the descriptive writing. The author does such a good job of writing in a very clear and detailed manner that a lot of folks just can’t accomplish without it dragging the fic down. It feels far heavier in description than dialogue, which I think fits it perfectly. The author was able to perfectly describe this absolutely beautiful fantasy realm in which the characters are, as well as the inhuman aspects of the characters. The description left me breathless – I wasn’t distracted, struggling to imagine what a, b, or c looked like – the author painted this amazing, film quality scene in my head. And because of that, I was able to focus fully on the dialogue and action of the characters.”  [anon]

WHISPERING SHADOWS written by @jooniesmind​

— Summary; It’s an already tough ability, that becomes borderline impossible, when you’re scared of ghosts. And Jimin was like that. — Disclaimer; angst, ghosts, mentioning of death

bookclub; review

“This is an excellent start to what could be a really sad, beautiful fic! The descriptions used are really stunning, painting a lovely picture (and a sad one). I’d love to see what would happen if JK came back, or even just following poor terrified-of-ghosts Jimin through his life, doing his job in whatever way he can manage. I’d love to learn more about how it works, what he does (and doesn’t do) and meet other ghosts he’s had to tangle with. And other whisperers! How it works and what makes them have the ability, etcetera. There’s such a whole rich world here that I think the author really began to develop in a beautiful way.” [anon]

“this story just hits you right in the feels. the author does a great job of putting so much emotion in a little one-shot that i’m just in awe at how they’ve done it. it is perfect!” [anon]

The Chaos Theory (Love Me Now) written by leanmeancuisine

— Summary; Jeon Jungkook, Prince of the South Korean Royal Pack and CEO of the largest conglomerate in the world, was thought to be following his father’s footsteps in becoming a Purebred Alpha. Oh, how wrong was that. Freshly presented at 18, Jungkook is discovered to be a Genus—a rare and one of a kind type of wolf that has more than one special gene. — Disclaimer; ABO Dynamics, mentioning of suicide, depression, kidnapping, poly-relationship

bookclub; review

“So I read this entire wip in one sitting. And then had to lay down and sleep on it before writing this. That’s how damn good this fic is. I was absolutely blown away. The style of writing is unbelievably well done. The author was able to really create this whole world and species, essentially, borrowing from some of the more traditional tropes but changing it into something very unique and creative. It feels so entirely fresh and interesting, weaving both very well handled traumas and angst in with softer, gentler bits that give the fic a level of depth and beauty that I haven’t seen in a very long time. All of the characters are so beautifully developed; I honestly can’t think of one I prefer more than the other of the ones that we have met so far. I’m so incredibly curious about the remaining members, as well as how Jin will blend with the rest of the group as things progress. I look forward to many updates!” [anon]

“ALRIGHT DAMN what a ride and im only prologue + 1st ch in! the introduction to jungkook's is honestly so good, and the author describes the scenes so perfectly its like we're there with jungkook, annoyed at the world. These two chapters definitely got my attention and i have a feeling ill be binging this in a near future. I can't wait to see how the author develop the other boys, how they'll introduce them... im getting excited now” [anon]

MONSTER UNDER THE BED written by Born2beSad

— Summary; Namjoon’s new apartment came with a little more than he was expecting… …luckily for him and his nighttime visitor, he’s into it. — Disclaimer; tentacles pwp, monsters,

bookclub; review

“This is such an interesting twist on the tentacle genre! I loved jimin and Joon's dynamic, although definitely wrong...but in a universe with monster under the beds i don't think that matters. Jimin as a character was weirdly endearing, and you can't help yourself from feeling sorry for him and his loneliness, and relieved he found Joon. And well, Joon is leaving his best life, so props to him for sticking around. The writing was impeccable, will definitely be going through the authors fics in a near future” [anon]

“I'm a lil bit of a newbie with tentacle porn reading wise and def haven't tried it writing wise but THIS WAS THE SHIIITTTT I LOVED IT SO MUCH (and lowkey highkey brought out a small tentacle porn interest of mine i didn't know i had oop) just the way Namjoon loved it and wanted it I could feel it in my freaking bones and maybe even related to him a littejnerighs i mean it was JIMIN HOW COULD YOU NOT and i loved the sprinkles of fluff in there it really brought a nice relief from the hot, heavy and body tingling smut embedded into it gdfoegg this was so good, such a hot way to depict a monster under the bed concept and the author did it so well also really inspired to dive into this territory of storytelling cause i'm 0.0 intrGUED” [anon]

“So, so good. Many of your general tentacle fics tie so deeply with nonconsent or dubious consent at best. Which is entirely fine, but sometimes it’s so nice to see something refreshing and new, and this fits the bill. While still brimming with great imagery and really well written smut, it also injects a supply of sweet fluff and near domesticity to the situation. Rather than being the ‘boy gets taken against his will by sex crazed monster’ – the relationship is symbiotic, allowing a give and take; even if it is largely physical in nature. I think that sheds such a fun light on the tentacle monster trope. This is one of those fics that I would really enjoy seeing another chapter or two, additional shenanigans that the two get up to with or without smut. Further, I love the descriptors used in the fic, I feel like it painted a really lovely visual that helped the reader really dive into it.” [anon]

“This fic....whew! It is really something! I don't read tentacle stuff and I'm not a fan of bottom!Namjoon but I wanted to read something different for this month. It's a great balance of fluff and smut with how the ending turns out; it's not rape or non-con either, since Namjoon is a huge monster lover lol I can just imagine him with a whole collection of monster dildos. The writing is wonderful too. The way the author set up the beginning without giving things away until maybe halfway through is really well done. Like, you already know Namjoon's going to consent but (at least for me) not in a way you expected. Jimin being a cute, friendly monster who isn't afraid to show his devilish side too <3 I seriously reccomend this to people who like tentacle porn. Maybe even people who don't read it often like me” [anon]

“This was such a surprisingly sweet and fluffy tentacle fic. I love the author's description of Jimin’s duality; the mixture between his sweet pretty features and his black demon tentacles, really feels so believe haha. The ending was so lovely and really put a smile on my face!” [@tinysweetscrown​]

INTO THE WOODS written by bugarungus

— Summary; Seokjin wakes up to find he’s been kidnapped by some nature nymphs and their pet. — Disclaimer; tentacle pwp, fae & farieis, dubious consent

bookclub; review

“Oh my, I was completely immersed in this beautiful little universe, the author created. Everything about this fic is so lovely and stunning - from the descriptions of Jin’s everyday life before he meets the nymphs to the actual smut. I loved the bickering between Jimin, Tae and Yoongi, because it truly felt like a “brotherly” relationship. Also the fact that they each were a different “type” of nymph, and especially Tae’s protectiveness of LeeAnn, was so interesting and funny to read. This fic really strikes a perfect balance between a dirty smutty plot with dubious consent without it being too vulgar and uncomfortable to read!” [@tinysweetscrown]

“Wowowowow. Honestly this fic blew me away. There was so much going on but it was all so clear and well written, just… Perfection. The descriptions were so clean and clear and visually stimulating, it was easy to picture exactly what was happening. This is something so hard to do sometimes, especially in smut with more than two people, and this one was four and a plant! I wanted to know more about the nymphs, and their plant – the backstory bet would be so fascinating and amazing. There was so much subtle romance between the nymphs, and even being dubious consent, I feel like that oozed into Jin as well – opening up the idea that the future isn’t going to be questionable. Kind of a happy ending even with a smidge of the darker/dubious consent that laced through it. I think also, the relationship between the nymphs was just really fun. Despite the alternate universe, the characters felt really true to the actual group members. Their personalities matched up great and I didn’t find myself wondering if x would actually say that, do that, etcetera. It’s amazing when you can keep things true to ‘life’ but put them into this awesome fantasy world. Just so, so well done.” [anon]

NICE THINGS written by @kimlinebiased​

— Summary; Namjoon is clumsy, even with others’ hearts. — Disclaimer; smut

bookclub; review

“This was such a sweet and wholesome fic! I especially enjoyed Namjoon's letter to Yoongi. I felt like the description of how Namjoon and Yoongi are different really fit so well with at least how I see them irl! Also the call back in the end to "this is why we can't have nice things" tied the whole fic so nicely together and left me all warm and fuzzy :)" [@tinysweetscrown]

“Nice things is such a sweet story, even with the angst thrown into it, you can feel the love yoongi and namjoon have for each other. It make the angst hurt even more, and wraps things up in cute ending. The smut if soft and just right for the story, and you just find yourself rooting for the characters to make it work, and also to pls wrap namjoon in bubble wrap...”[anon]

“A blend of angst and smut, it's really well done. I don't read a lot of canon/idol stuff nor do I write it much, but I decided I'd give it a read. Considering it's Dean writing, I wasn't disappointed haha Namjoon and Yoongi have a really nice relationship and Yoongi's reluctance to get back with Namjoon makes sense given how Namjoon broke his heart. The smut at the end is A+ too.” [anon]

DEVILS HAND by @softjeon​ & @cassiavioletblue​

— Summary; There had been rumors, but in the end it was not really a secret that Namjoon loved delicate and beautiful things. Especially when it came down to his lovers and his castle. It was decorated with lot of flowing, long blue curtains, colorful paintings in every room, rows of marble columns leading along every aisle. There was a large garden surrounding the palace, which was by far Jungkook’s favorite place to be – next to the king’s bedroom. — Disclaimer; alcohol, abusive relationships, abusive behavior, (sexual) violence, major character death

bookclub; review

“This fic….. ruined me… When I first started reading it, I was immediately intrigued, because I had no idea where the fic was going! I was so captivated by it, and I HAD TO finish it, but holy fuck I needed like a good day to digest it. The universe the authors created was absolutely beautiful and so well-described that I feel like I, days later, still have a clear image in my head of what the scenes look like - as if I’d seen a movie. The ending was absolutely devastating and painful and awful (but like in a good way) and im so conflicted about the whole thing…………” [@tinysweetscrown]

“alright so another masterpiece by the incredible duo! The dynamic in this story are amazingly complex and layered, the characters interesting and their motives are well thought out.. You can't help but have your stomach tied in a knot after the first chapter, anticipation making you nervous. There's this general feeling that shit will hit the fan and it won't be pretty... beautifully written, bravo!” [anon]

“How. Dare. You. Omg, I just reread this fic and ughhhh the ending breaks my heart every time! I've never hated Namjoon in a fic before. Even when I've made him an asshole, I didn't hate him. But here...he's just such a dick and Jungkook is such a sweetheart looking to please the man he loves. It's such a sad story because Jungkook is a rabbit surrounded by vipers (Taehyung being the only good one imo). I definitely rec it to anyone who wants a good angsty read. I do say mind the triggers though, since it's not for everyone. The writing is beautiful, sets a good pace, and gives detail without going overboard. Jey and Cat really get you inside the character's feelings while delivering really steamy smut scenes.” [anon]

“The Devil’s Hand was such a sad, dark story for all involved. I don’t often read major character death because it makes me so sad, but I think it was really fitting for this fic. There was no winning for JK, and the end really solidified that lesson of not knowing what you have until it’s gone. The relationship between Taehyung and Jungkook was one of my favorite parts of the entire fic. They had such a well-developed friendship and I think that Tae really embodied the person that JK deserved, in a weird way. Though they were only friends, he was loving and trusting and would do anything for JK, even at the risk of his own life. The contrast between how Tae treated him versus Namjoon, even versus Hoseok – it was so stark and telling in terms of the fic and the deeper meanings. I think overall the fic was heart wrenching and so, so sad, but such an excellent piece that really cuts the reader to the bone. “ [anon]

The Drabble-Game; MASTERLIST

— prompt; “Sometimes the darkness is too big to keep inside.”  

Thank you to everyone who participated! Stay tuned for the next theme of the month to participate! 

THE ROOM WHERE IT HAPPENED written by @chimknj​

— summary; Jimin was in the room when Hoseok walked in. Only one of them would get out of it alive.

EAT THE RICH (BECAUSE THEY’RE ROTUND AND DELICIOUS) written by @kimlinebiased​

— summary; Jungkook had a mission. That mission may involve killing people and burying the bodies. It’s going great… Until the bodies go missing.

— Join the Bookclub here! — official post — faq

[sugarchains]

Title: 12 Months 

Chapters: 1/1

Pairing: Kepcobi

Rating: Explicit!

Notes: HI HELLO My friend made me listen to this podcast and it killed me very slowly and very publicly for weeks. Also when I’m obsessed with a thing, I either cosplay it or write fanfic of it. Have a fanfic. Also I fudged timelines because I love Maxwell and I need her present always. 

LMAO BONES IM SO SORRY BECAUSE THIS WAS FOR YOU LIKE 2 YEARS AGO I LOVE YOU!!! forgive me ok

~

There are numerous ways that he has fucked Daniel Jacobi within the past year. Fucked up, fucked over, mind fucked-he’s been fucking Jacobi since they first met. 

Technically. 

It starts with what could be called a mind fuck because, let’s be real. Daniel’s not stupid. Impulsive, brash, and every bit as loud as his job requires him to be. But he lets himself be eased into it- blows up an office for an appraising look the first month, demolishes a city block for a wink and a smile month two, murders for a hand cupping the back of his neck and good boy stated fondly into the air around them. 

-

SI-5 training was different than other set ups. They’re not military and they’re not Black Ops technically- nor are they spies. Also technically, they’re all three and it’s better to not ask questions and just do as you’re told.  (Rule number 3).

They need to be ready for anything, and that’s the excuse Kepler gives when he calls Jacobi in to spar, just the two of them. He wipes the floor with him, more than once. It’s 4 months since he picked Daniel up at the bar and in this month he lets Warren press him hard, throw him harder into the mats.

-

The fifth month, Warren fucks him over lets Daniel get shot and it runs like this: He took a risk and it backfired and he didn’t even realize it until almost too late.

The rest of the fifth month is eventful, from an objective perspective. 

(“Promise me you won’t fall in love with him.”

“What?" 

”Promise me, Daniel. You know how you are.“

"I have no idea what you could be hinting at.”

“Needy, desperate for approval, hanging on his every word like a-”

“OK, ok! …I promise." 

"You promise what?”

“Are you really gonna make me say this?”

“I’m going to record you so I can play it back when you make a bad decision later on." 

"Fucking….I promise not to fall in love with the Major. Happy?”

“Yeah. I don’t believe you, by the way.”

“That’s fair." 

Warren watches this scene play out from afar, watches Alana curl up on a hospital bed next to Daniel (Maxwell and Jacobi, he reminds himself-there’s no reason to get so comfortable when it’s only been five months and even less for Ala-Maxwell. No reason to be so comfortable right now either) from a small screen on a tablet in Cutter’s office. Internally, he’s a combination of swirling emotions, but externally? Perfect mask of the perfect soldier.

"Well! Serious stuff there; wouldn’t you agree, Warren?”

“….Yes sir.”

“Do you have any ideas about ~who~ they could be talking about? Hmm?”

“As far as I know, sir…they don’t work for anyone else." 

"And Warren,” Cutter states, taking the momentary pause to use his thumb and forefinger to gently force eye contact between the two of them. “Do you make a habit of falling in love with your employees?”

“…..No sir.”

“Excellent! Keep it that way. I know you can and will do everything in your power to stop something silly from happening." 

"Of course, sir." 

He doesn’t immediately go and warn/remind them that they are being watched. What he does do is visit Jacobi in the hospital the next day (sans flowers), lets Maxwell guilt-glare him into leaving while Jacobi is still sleeping to go pick up flowers, visits again in the same day so that Maxwell can yell at him-

("We were here a week, Major!" 

"There were matters that needed to be attended to." 

"More important matters than Jacobi nearly dying?" 

"Calm down, Doctor. I never said that.”) 

-gives Jacobi the flowers and smiles back when Jacobi beams at him.

He also takes them out to eat when Jacobi’s healed, lets him pick the place, and waits until they’re all eating before he drops the surveillance bomb on them. Can tell from the way Maxwell won’t look at him and the way Jacobi is only looking at him that they know exactly what conversation was heard and how they feel about that he doesn’t know and he may have just found the one thing he can’t read his team on-) 

-

Six months in and the mind fucks turning into something beyond his carefully set up control. They had just completed a beautiful mission that had involved blowing up a building and a high speed chase. He could feel adrenaline still buzzing under his skin, and he can feel Daniel’s eyes on his arms on the wheel, so he presses harder on the gas to hear the breathless laugh from the passenger seat. The ride to the safe house is uneventful otherwise, but inside sees Daniel pushing him against the door and kissing him breathlessly. Warren can tell Daniel didn’t think this through clearly (of course he didn’t)-he clearly thought that it might get him punched in the face, or worse, get him a polite and distant reprimand, but at this point life is good and Warren is tired of denying himself so he. He kisses Daniel back, changes their positions against the door so Daniel is pressed up against it. They kiss until they’re both hard, until both their hands are pulling and pushing at each others’ shirts to get at skin and they’re pulling away to ask “Shower?” and “Please” respectively. 

Daniel lets himself be manhandled into a shower where the water runs hot pressure down his side as Warren presses him hard against the wall, tangles a hand in his hair to pull his head to the side, trails a line of biting kisses across his neck while his other hand is jacking them both off frantically. 

Warren swears he can hear Cutter’s “~stop something silly from happening~” playing in his head, warring with the way Daniel moans out please and oh fuck each time he twists his hand around just right, but he chooses to ignore it in favor of feeling the way Daniel’s nails drag lines down his back when he comes between them seconds before Warren.

He’s fucked.

-

The seventh month has Warren teaching Daniel the color system and they spend all the free time they have that month pushing their limits. Warren’s trying to be mindful of the limits but there’s only so much he can take of Daniel looking up at him, eyes wide and blurry with tears of frustration, mouth slick and bruised and begging, telling him please please green the color is green don’t stop again fuck, while he grips bruises into his thigh with one hand and fingers him deep, stretches him wide with the other. 

-

The eighth month reminds him that he’s not a romantic, except that he is. Because in the same month he’s discovering that Daniel likes to be choked when he’s sitting in Warren’s lap, grinding against his cock, he’s also lining up the missions for the upcoming months and taking care to avoid anything at the end of four months out from now. 

He purposely doesn’t think about the way Daniel smiles when he chokes him harder for digging his nails into Warren’s back.

-

The ninth month finds Warren fucking Daniel’s mouth in the office. He didn’t mean to, of course. But it had been weeks since they had last touched, the amount and intensity of the missions beginning to pile up as the trio’s notoriety grew. There were no machines who didn’t love Maxwell and Jacobi’s explosive version of delicate destruction left more than a few people in awe. And the fact that they would only listen and work for Kepler? Icing on the cake. 

But of course that doesn’t go unnoticed and of course Cutter calls Kepler and Jacobi into his office one day in early in the month. Jacobi has a terrible poker face when he’s expecting the bluff, but his ability to lie is almost catastrophic when he’s caught off guard. So that’s how he flushes pink when Cutter asks if he knows how to make something obvious, if he knows how to make something so people can see it from afar. 

“There’s up and coming companies, Daniel. We don’t want to let them get the idea into their heads that they can compete with Goddard, right?”

“Of course, sir." 

"So I need you to make it a statement. Let them know who runs this. Can you do that for me?" 

"Absolutely sir." 

"Good!” And he’s turning his attention to Kepler now. “What a good boy you’ve got there, Warren. I can see why one might do something silly." 

Kepler glances at Jacobi quickly, internally proud of the fact that Daniel didn’t have a reaction to that beyond his eyes widening. 

–It’s weeks later when Jacobi gets the bomb right, runs a test run of the bomb at a location that Cutter set up personally for this, a location that Kepler almost didn’t see if Cutter is to be believed. 

"He asked for you personally, Warren. Can you believe that? Seems I wasn’t enough company for him. Shame really." 

And internally, Kepler is smug as all fuck. Even though that means Jacobi showed his hand, even though that means whatever Cutter guessed about them is now solidified in his mind, it also means-something.

He’s not sure yet. 

"I’m sure he didn’t mean anything by it, sir,” Kepler says mildly, gaze carefully directed outside the car they’re traveling in.

He’s fine when they pull up to the area where Jacobi has everything set up. He’s fine when Jacobi sets of a series of explosions, all triggering a bigger bomb down the line. He’s fine when Cutter congratulates Jacobi on a job well done, but it cuts out when Cutter plants a quick kiss to the side of Jacobi’s head in continued celebration. Cutter catches his eye and the intent is clear-

You can have your plaything, but whats yours is mine and I get what I want when I want. 

It’s a message he hears loud and clear, but it doesn’t mean Kepler won’t still claim what’s his. Which is how he ends up back in his office, one hand bracing himself against the door, while the other hand is cupping the back of Jacobi’s head so it doesn’t hit the door when he fucks his cock into Jacobi’ s mouth.  

Jacobi’s hands are behind his back, not tied just behind his back because he’s not allowed to touch right now he just has to take it as Warren fucks his cock deeper into his throat, take it as he presses deep enough to stop him from breathing oncetwice, before he’s pulling his cock out to slide across Daniel’s cheek. The hand against the door balls into a fist when Daniel runs his lips up the side of Warren’s cock, the fist in his hair tightens when he slides his lips over the head, and Daniel moans long and muffled when Warren starts fucking back into his mouth in earnest. 

He let’s himself get lost in the motions of fucking into Daniel’s mouth, lets himself get lost in watching the sight of his cock stretching Daniel’s lips before it becomes too much and he’s fucking forward onetwothree times and pulling back just enough that his cock slips out of Daniel’s mouth and he comes across his face. Pulse after pulse of come leaves him and arcs across Daniel’s cheeks and bruised lips, marking him as he pants openly on his knees.

Warren braces himself heavily against the door while he catches his breath, caging Daniel in, walling the world out, and maybe it’s a little symbolic but his thighs are still shaking too much to move and Daniel’s expression is too fucking open, he wouldn’t move even if he could walk. He takes the moment to slide his fingers across Daniel’s cheek, before pushing come covered fingers into Daniel’s mouth. They hold eye contact while he sucks them clean.

They’re fucked.

-

The next two months are filled with missions, surveillance, and destruction, so much to the point that before Kepler realizes it, he hasn’t touched Jacobi in nearly eight weeks. Ten months, eleven months fly by with minimal contact and even less down time and suddenly it’s been a year since Jacobi has started working for him. So when he gets a mission thrown at him to vet a candidate for Goddard that is due by Tuesday, the 24th, it’s all he can do to not punch his desk in frustration and throw the file back at Rachel. 

“Maybe you should take Jacobi with you on this one, Warren.”

“Excuse me?” 

“Oh, I just mean I mentioned this mission in passing to him earlier today and he looked ready to blow something up.”

“Ah. Well-”

“It could be because your one year anniversary is coming up, isn’t it?”

“…Anniversary?

“Of him coming to work under you here? Surely you haven’t forgotten. He’s really worked up over it.” 

He didn’t forget, (of course he didn’t forget who does she take him for he’s been steady stockpiling fireworks both illegally and legally for the past two weeks) but he doesn’t want to give her the benefit of having something to tell him about his own employees, so he just stares blankly at her until she rolls her eyes in disgust and leaves. 

-

It ends up not being a big deal to accomplish surveillance on the prospect and return his findings before the 24th. He does it without the team, figuring there’s no reason to pull their efforts into this. Instead, he focuses on studiously ignoring the hints about the upcoming anniversary commemoration from Jacobi as he tells him about the “upcoming assignment” they have. 

In all honestly, it doesn’t occur to him that Daniel would be hurt by this. They’re special operatives for an agency that has their hands in everything. This isn’t the type of thing that should upset people like them. 

Still though, they’re fucked. He’s fucked. So when Daniel eloquently starts complaining about Warren ignoring the date, he realizes that oh.

Oh, they’re on the same page about this. Which is. 

That’s good. 

-

He forgot how stupidly easy it is to loose himself in Daniel, how quickly he gives into need and want, and he looses time somewhere between Daniel setting the first firework off with a brilliant smile and crowding him against the side of the truck with a hand on his throat and one tight on his hip.

Looking up at Jacobi while he’s riding him feels a little too intimate A Little Too Much like this is a love thing, A Little Too Much like they would already die for each other, so Warren buries his face in Daniel’s neck, works bruises into the skin there while Daniel’s fingers tangle in his hair.

He keeps his hands on Daniel’s hips, holding him steady while he leans back and he listens to the way Daniel’s breathing speeds up, listens to the way Warren falls from his lips- not desperate and needy, but wanting-

It’s on a particularly good stroke where Warren twists his hips when he’s in Daniel and he slips up, a desperate oh fuck Sir, falls from his lips. And.

And he has control over himself, he really does, but something about hearing Daniel say sir in that context has him moving quicker than he thought to pin Daniel underneath him and fuck into him hard. Daniel looks up at him in shock for a moment before melting into the motions, fucking himself back when Warren fucks himself in and he’s truly relieved that Daniel closed his eyes because his face is too open and too expressive to be getting fucked by his boss under some fireworks like it’s this big romantic fucking gesture-

He can feel his orgasm building in the base of his spine, feel the heat settling in the pit of his stomach, and he can tell Daniel is close too-from the nails that are digging into his shoulders, to the way that Daniel’s moans are turning into a louder, steady chant of fuckfuckfuck sir please sir please, to the tightening of his thighs around Warren’s waist. 

Warren is close, he’s so close, he feels like he’s fighting it off and loosing as he pulls one hand away from where he is gripping Daniel’s hip tight enough to bruise and moves it to press against Daniel’s throat. His whines choke off almost immediately and Daniel tenses up, eyes rolling back, his mouth, slick and red and bruised, falling open as he tries to gasp for air before Warren’s pulling his hand away, and Daniel comes gasping, stroking himself off to work the come out, grinding back against Warren as he fucks into him twothree more times before coming inside him. 

Warren knows they have to clean up and head out, there’s no way they actually get enough downtime to lay back and enjoy the afterglow-they may have certain immunities, but they are in public, they just set off a fuckload of explosives, and there’s only a matter of time before they have to report back. But for right now, he leans over Daniel (while he’s still in him, savoring the low moan he gives) and kisses him slow and deep, and acknowledges that this is absolutely fucked, but they’ll deal with it.

It’s what they do.

[thinkingisadangerouspastime]

a most holy sin

i watched Bohemian Rhapsody and cried at least 12 times so of course i was (loosely) inspired by it and had to write an ineffable husbands fanfic. i definitely listened to a Best of Queen playlist while i wrote it, too. i hope you enjoy and please forgive historical and medical inaccuracies because im sure there are some. also for some reason the line break isn't working?? i'm going to try to add it again later.

(I know Gabriel does not technically outrank Aziraphale but for the sake of plot he's gonna be in charge of Earthly affairs.)

WARNING: There is usage of homophobic slurs at a point in this story. If you are sensitive to such, either be wary as you read or simply do not read this fic. Don't worry, you won't hurt my feelings if you keep scrolling.

~*~

"I'd like to be temporarily stationed in America."

Gabriel looked up from his desk, every inch of it covered in paperwork. Glasses that Aziraphale knew very well the archangel did not need slid down his nose. Gabriel pushed them back up. "Why?"

Succinct. As per usual. Aziraphale pretended that he was not twisting his ring anxiously around his pinky as he spoke. "Well, I do read American papers every so often, and I've been keeping tabs on a certain, er, an epidemic, of sorts, that is happening over there."

Gabriel removed the silver frames from his nose, folding them and placing them on his desk. "Right. The AIDS epidemic."

"Yes," Aziraphale murmured. "Yes, quite. I assure you that I don't intend to miracle up a cure for the disease. It's best to let humans work through that on their own, I assume. I simply wish to - to ease the pain of those in the final stages."

Gabriel was silent. Aziraphale began to wonder if he was pushing his luck with this request. He'd nearly been discovered with Crowley only two decades or so ago, not to mention his boss was not known for being the friendliest or the most sympathetic of angels -

"Yes."

Aziraphale blinked. "I beg your pardon?"

"I said yes, you may go." Gabriel sighed, scrawling his signature on a document in glittering gold ink before shoving the paper away. "I have also been keeping up with information on the epidemic. Those victims could certainly use some angelic kindness right now, what with so many being rejected by their families even as they're on their deathbeds. Beelzebub undoubtedly has a special place in Hell for those sorts of nasty people, I'm sure."

"And we have a special place in Heaven for the victims?"

"Precisely." Gabriel returned his attention to the stack of papers in front of him. "You're dismissed, Aziraphale. Don't stay too long."

"Of course," Aziraphale breathed, nodding. He was almost unable to believe everything had worked out so well. "Thank you, Gabriel." Not wanting to overstay his visit and risk having the decision reversed, Aziraphale promptly left. He considered taking the back exit out, but it wasn't as if he was in a rush. He still had to pack, after all.

It was quite a shame he couldn't simply miracle himself to America. Airplanes were... Less than enjoyable, in Aziraphale's opinion. But miracles had to be preserved.

He didn't want to think about how many he might have to perform in the very near future.

~*~

America, circa 1990

Aziraphale had ditched his usual tartan suit for new tartan scrubs. He was posing as a nurse, working in a ward delegated specifically to victims of AIDS in the final stages. As much as it pained him, he refrained from miracling them back into health. God probably would not take too kindly to that, what with the circle of life and all, even considering Her infinite generosity. Instead, Aziraphale eased their pain as they passed to Heaven. If nothing else, they deserved to know that good things awaited them on the other side.

"Room 636, Nurse Fell," a woman called to Aziraphale as he walked down the hall. Her voice had the rounded edge of a faint Southern drawl. "He's got family with him right now, but they'll be out soon."

"Right. Thank you." He nodded at her as she passed. Aziraphale had memorized the layout of the hospital before he'd started "working" there - it helped him maximize his time with the patients. Not to mention he had to be back in Soho before the end of the year.

"This is your own fault, you know."

Aziraphale froze.

"You're the who grew up and decided to be a fucking fag, goddamnit!"

He recognized that tone. It was one he heard all too often in the AIDS ward.

"And now that choice is killing you. Just like it killed your little queer boyfriend."

Aziraphale resisted the urge to swear. Of course the voice was coming from room 636.

"Hope you're happy with yourself. Hope you're proud."

The man's words were laced with more venom than the world's deadliest snake could provide. Aziraphale reached for the door handle, only to find that it had been locked. Very much against hospital regulations, but also rather common in these situations.

"This is the devil's consequence. You know why they're calling it the 'gay plague'? Because only fags are getting it." The man sighed, an intensified frustration bleeding into his tone. "You just had to be a queer, didn't you? You had to be the family disappointment." His voice dropped, and he growled the lethal blow. "I can't believe I ever called you my son."

Aziraphale didn't care if Heaven reprimanded him. He snapped his fingers, unlocking the door and entering the room without a moment's hesitation. He straightened his back and stared down the father. "Sir, I am going to have to ask that you leave here immediately."

The man's lip curled in disgust. "A queer nurse? I should have known."

Aziraphale ignored the comment, standing his ground. "I must insist that you leave, or else I'll be forced to call security."

For a moment, Aziraphale was afraid the man wouldn't go. But after a long pause, he left in a furious silence.

Aziraphale rushed over to the patient's bed. He was young, in his late teens or early twenties. Still a boy, really. And that only made it all the more heartbreaking.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that." Aziraphale checked the IV in the boy's arm, making sure it remained connected. "You don't deserve to be treated like something is wrong with you."

"Maybe there is something wrong with me."

Sweat beaded the boy's forehead, and Aziraphale's heart ached a little more when he saw tearstains on his cheeks.

"Am I really going to Hell, nurse?" the boy whispered. "Was falling in love really a sin?" He closed his eyes, biting his lip in a clear attempt to keep himself from sobbing. "I loved him. I loved him so much. All I did was fall in love."

"My dear boy." Aziraphale pulled up a chair next to the hospital bed before sitting down. "Of course you aren't going to Hell. Believe me, falling in love is no sin."

"That's not what my father thinks." His voice was bitter. Much too bitter for someone who likely had just started university.

"Well, fathers don't know everything," Aziraphale replied. "Trust me, dear boy. There is nothing you have to fear in death."

The boy wiped tears from his eyes. "Yeah? How would you know?"

Aziraphale snapped his fingers. The Almighty really was not going to be pleased with him. So many miracles only a few minutes apart was sure to get him reprimanded. Or maybe it wouldn't. He never could tell what exactly She would approve or disapprove of.

The boy's eyes widened as he took in the sudden change of his surroundings. He tried to sit up, but Aziraphale stopped him.

"Careful, now. I'm simply giving you a peek into what awaits you."

The boy shook his head in disbelief. "Is this - is this Heaven?"

"Indeed." A part of it, at least. A lovely little spot of paradise that was reminiscent of Eden. Many enjoyed it when they first ascended to Heaven. A place to get acclimated.

The boy stared at Aziraphale. "You're an angel."

Aziraphale's wings fluttered, as if responding to the query. "Yes, I am. I requested to be stationed in America to help ease the pain of those suffering from AIDS. People in the... Final stages of the disease."

The boy nodded. A faint smile appeared on his lips. "That means I'm dying, then."

Young people truly were getting more perceptive. "I'm afraid so, my dear." Aziraphale snapped his fingers, and the vision of Heaven dissipated. Regretfully, his wings went, too.

The boy sighed, leaning back more deeply into the hospital bed's pillow. "Would you believe me if I told you that I'm going to miss my father?"

Aziraphale didn't respond. He knew an answer wasn't expected.

"I'm going to miss him. Even if -" The boy's voice cracked. "Even if he hates me, he was the only family I had. I forgive him, and - and I want God to forgive him, too."

"She will," Aziraphale murmured, his voice so low only he could hear it. "She always does."

The boy's heart rate was dropping. Aziraphale resisted every instinct in his body to save him. He could not interfere. It was not his responsibility to influence Earthly life and death.

"At least I'll get to see Miles again," the boy breathed. Tears were trickling down his face. "It's been a long year without him."

He closed his eyes.

The machine flatlined.

Aziraphale could sense the boy's spirit leaving his body. He returned the chair to the side of the room, then slid the curtain shut around the bed.

"I'm sorry, angel."

Aziraphale didn't know when he'd started crying. "I can't imagine even your lot could be responsible for this, Crowley."

There was a pause. "AIDS itself is one of the final gifts of Pestilence unto Earth, despite that they retired eons ago." Footsteps echoed in the quiet room, moving closer to Aziraphale. "But only humans could be so cruel to one another."

"I know," Aziraphale whispered. "And I think that's the worst part of all." He didn't even blink as Crowley stepped in front of him, brushing away his tears with his thumb.

"There's nothing you can do, angel," Crowley murmured. "You know that."

Aziraphale did know that. He hated it, but he knew it all too well. "I just - I just don't understand. All they do is fall in love, Crowley! What could have wrong in human history where they started to believe that love was sinful?"

Aziraphale expected a witty comment in response. A dry quip about Catholics, or the Shaker community. He certainly had not prepared himself for a serious answer.

"When did Heaven and Hell start believing it?"

Crowley's sunglasses slid down his nose. He took them off, tucking them into his jacket. They stared at each other, eye to eye.

"I've been - I've been wondering that myself," Aziraphale stammered. His voice was hushed. "But it's not my place to question it."

Crowley shrugged. "The Almighty has been more forgiving as of late. Since it's you, She just might allow it."

"I - I couldn't possibly."

"I know, angel." He sighed. "I know."

Neither spoke after that. But neither made a move to walk away.

Aziraphale knew he had to leave. He had to report the death of the young man so the room could be available for other patients. But he couldn't bring himself to step away from Crowley.

The stood only inches apart. Aziraphale wasn't certain whether he'd reached for Crowley's hand or if the demon had grabbed his, but their fingers were intertwined and Aziraphale knew damn well he didn't want to let go.

"How did you find me?" he finally asked. "I don't recall telling you I was leaving Soho. Or where I was going." In fact, they hadn't spoken since 1967. The night in the Bentley.

Crowley shrugged. In a rare moment of tenderness, his thumb gently brushed over Aziraphale's knuckles. "The city feels different when you're not there."

"O-Oh. I see." Aziraphale found his gaze drifting down from Crowley's eyes to his lips. He didn't fail to notice that Crowley had lessened the distance between them even further.

"Is love a sin, angel?" Crowley whispered. His free hand moved to cup Aziraphale's cheek. "Because if so, it must be the holiest sin there is."

Aziraphale would have laughed had the tension between them not been almost suffocating. "Well, my dear, I really don't think there's such thing as a 'holy' sin -"

He was cut off as Crowley captured his mouth with his. Aziraphale found himself melting into the kiss, pulling the demon towards him. Crowley wrapped his arms around Aziraphale's waist, and Aziraphale placed his arms around Crowley's neck.

He shouldn't be doing this. He didn't know why he shouldn't be, because every atom in his body was telling him that this was right, that this was love, that Crowley was all he needed -

But he couldn't.

Aziraphale pulled away, certain that regret was written all over his face. He couldn't bring himself to look Crowley in the eyes. "I'm sorry. You deserve - you deserve better than me."

Crowley laughed. It was harsh. Bitter. "I'm a demon, angel. I don't 'deserve' anything. It's part of the job description. In the fine print. Non-negotiable. You know that." He yanked his sunglasses out of his pocket and shoved them onto his face.

"No." Aziraphale's voice refused to move above a whisper. "You deserve everything, my dear. Anything you want. The whole world."

"I don't want the whole damn world. I only want you."

Aziraphale forced himself to look at Crowley. The demon's expression was unreadable behind the black lenses. "I can't, Crowley. Not now. Not yet."

Crowley raised an eyebrow. "'Yet'?"

Aziraphale nodded. "One day, I'll - I'll be ready. To go faster. As fast as you. I swear it. Just - Just not today." And he meant it. More than anything he'd ever said. "Will you... Wait for me?"

A small smile appeared on Crowley's lips. It was a rare sight, but one of Aziraphale's favorites.

"For you, angel? Always."

Aziraphale blinked, and the demon was gone. He didn't know when they'd see each other again. He didn't know what the future would hold for them, either. But when Crowley had left, he'd taken all of Aziraphale's tears with him. As he so often did.

Perhaps his demon had a point.

If love was a sin, it truly was a holy one.

Maybe even one worth Falling for.

~*~

im a mess, y'all. i love these two more than i love myself. i hope you enjoyed! feel free to send me prompt requests for them or for ineffable bureaucracy because both are such good pairings.

[echo-inthevoid]

Season 2 q&a and overall reaction

Jonny stealing everyone's names XD 

Is martin going to be ok!? I also need to know! 

He said no;-; 

ok ya, no one's gonna be ok. 

Ya, he must do sooo much research. 

Ya, except for "fatigue" lol.

Eyyy the mechanisms!! 

What's the red string brigade? Ok, I guess a group of fans theorizing about stuff. 

Oh ok so someone else did martins poetry. Ooh, there's more martin poetry out there! *grabby hands*

Ok ya, Alex clarifying that Jon isn't stupid he just makes poor decisions. Probably if he'd paused and thought about it (like I did lol, I had to go do some stuff in the middle of that ep and thought about it a whole bunch lol) instead of immediately going out and buying an axe and further isolating himself and panicking immediately he probably would have figured it out. This is why it's bad to panic in a crisis guys. 

Eyyy! Jonny's parents voiced Gertrude and Leitner! That's so cool. 

XD Jonny grumbling about having to work with his parents. 

Hmm, I hadn't really thought of Gertrude being like a mother figure in the story? She just seems very cut-throat I guess from what Leitner said. Idk so far I've been very suspicious of her. Especially since that one statement where her photo burned a whole bunch of people or something. She just seems very shady... 

Alex chortling over Jonny's pain. XD

Side note, Every time there's a q&a I just can't stop noticing Jonny's voice going in and out of archivist range? Like most of the time I'm just listening along and then he'll say a sentence a bit grumblier and my brains immediately like "ARCHIVIST! That's THE ARCHIVIST!!" 

Martin would be the last one alive in Friday the 13th! It's official! 

(Is it bad that this gives me hope)

Jon likes Nonfiction, documentaries, and probably collects something just a little bit weird. *writes down for use in potential fics* 

also while im at it I remember jon saying he dislikes coffee at one point,  and so many people have him liking coffee in their fics! This has been your daily reminder of that fact because ever since then it keeps bugging me lol. (But also do whatever u want.)

Alex's spluttering sounds so much like Martin.

Yes!! I want to hear jon sing!! Yes! Musical Episode When!!?

Ah yes yes yes! All the characters are so unique!!? How does he do it!! 

Ya, it being in audio format sometimes makes it hard to understand what's happening in the live-action bits. (Live-action is the wrong word but u know what I mean.)

Oh ok ya, how he mentioned he got a pipe was quite clever I didn't realize that that's why he mentioned it at all. 

Ooh, there's a manga where there's something similar to Michael? I'll have to look that up later...

XD Alex and Jonny arguing about apples. 

Ok, so all the statements we're hearing ARE for reals. I kinda assumed but good to have it confirmed.

They used to hang out together!!? Work function curry nights!! ;-; 

Ya Ya! Who made the leitners!?

"You are assuming a book needs to be written" ...ok then. (but it has to have been created somehow??? Did they just spring fully formed from the powers? why? And why take the form of books?)

Alex's mischievous laugh about whether jon has friends *trembles in fear*

Yes!! Micheal is so good! I'm so happy they love him too! Yesyes! His laugh! 

Ah Yes!! Mary kaey was so creepy! 

XD yes yes yes fatigue was written on zero sleep, I knew it! 

Akskdjdkd I love them so much. Also, I've looked up Michaels voice actor luke booys and he does some other horrory type sketches n stuff and I kiiinda want to do a little animatic with some of those but it's Michael like annoying some poor soul lost in his halls... I think that'd be fun. I wonder if anyone's done that yet? If so someone send me the links I neeeed iiitt :3

Season 2 summary:

Uuuuu ya so this season was really good. I kinda listened to it in bursts of about ten episodes every couple weeks and then have been saving up the reactions to post later so these are usually going up about a week or so after I actually listened to the episode just FYI. 

I also do have a lot of spoilers cause I can't keep myself away from fanfic and people don't always tag for spoilers and I kiiinda wana know what's coming beforehand anyway? Idk it's hard man I get very stressed about what might happen and then also listening to too much at a time is too spooky for my poor little heart so I gotta read the less spooky fanfic to fulfill the hyperfixation you see. (If anyone has fanfic with spoilers only up to season 2 that'd be great btw) 

Anyway, I try not to take spoiler type stuff into account unless I'm just so sure of it I can't really not acknowledge that I know about it. 

Also, can I just talk about Michael for a minute?? Cause he's such a unique character? And I guess maybe there are other characters like him but I haven't ever seen one -tho to be fair tma is only like the third horror thing I've ever really got into (the other two are the SCP Foundation in its various forms and Little Nightmares. Hence why I keep making reference to SCP it's really the only thing I know similar to this.) But he's such a cool concept!!? Like someTHING that still has a personality? He's so not human? Like I get what he says but also I don't really? Idk im pretty sure he's an avatar right? Right?? Idk if that means he was a person at some point? But all this to say that he is probably the most inhuman character I've come across so far and I'm trying to figure out what it is about him that's so "other" to me? Like... I don't really know what Micheal's deal is? he seems to want to be sort of a neutral mischief-maker but also it seems like he keeps getting invested. But also I just love the way he talks about himself. Like he's a monster that has a personality and is fully intelligent but isn't just evil but isn't neutral either and certainly isn't benevolent. Like he's so complex and just,,,, the idea of a "thing" that's got a personality?? I love it? Kind of like dryads or spirits of things? Like the idea that after a long time things gain personality just by existing? Not that that's what Michael is necessarily? but that same sort of concept applies to him I think. Like the way he IS the maze and wants to help but wants to just watch but wants to kill them all. He's just so interestinggggggg. (And another vision of what jon could become?)

 also "es Mentiras" is a beautiful name 💕

So are him and not-Sasha avatars? Not-Sasha also seems completely inhuman and I was under the impression that avatars were (or used to be) human? Or are they like personifications of their power? Do all the powers have personifications of themselves. not-Sasha seems even less human than Michael? Like she seems to just really genuinely enjoy causing fear? Tho I guess we didn't really get to hear a lot of her. She just seemed kinda gleefully angry most of the time we heard from her. Was she... Human once!???

Anyway. Also, can I just talk about leitners line about jon belonging to the eye!!? Just..*chefs kiss* hnnnngg I need more jon grappling with that. I just need more everyone dealing with the fallout post all of the finallies ok? I still need more of jon angsting over his worms scars and stuff and now I also need jon freaking out about belonging to a fear god power thing. 

Also Martin! Is Martin ok? He sure did a lot of yelling which he doesn't usually? Look I love him and he actually thinks before he acts (unlike SOME people *looks at jon*) and he writes poetry and it is pretty good poetry ok!! And he cares about everyone and just wants a happy ending and aaaaa😭

Petition to get some statements from Martin's pov tho? I mean that's not gonna happen cause Jon's the archivist but I want more martin pov!! Maybe we can get some of his poem tapes??? Pls????? 

I feel so bad for Tim. It sounds like he's kinda fallen into despair.

Also Elias!!? Is showing his spooky side!!? He can control cameras and beat a man to death with a pipe!!? This is his "place of powerr"!!? I am afeared!!? At least jon knows he shouldn't trust him now. Oh jeez, I wonder if jon will listen back to the tape and know what happened. Thhhatsss rough. Oh dear, I hope he doesn't feel guilty cause Leitner did keep trying to hurry him and now everyone thinks it was him. Even martin thinks he did it? Wich like I kinda want to hear more of his thoughts on that? How much does he believe that jon did it? Tim certainly seems pretty certain but he's a bit biased and cynical right now so. 

And they were in the maze for DAYS? 

Now I need martin recovering from being stuck with Tim in Michaels maze for days being angry and worried and hungry etc... Dksjdksa knowing jon could be dying RIGHT NOW and there's nothing he can do. Please someone give me the fic links if this exists!! I've already written like 5 drabbles based entirely on spoilers/other fics (which I'll probably post (w/ links to their inspirations) once I'm caught up and can make sure I'm not just completely demolishing cannon lol. 

Leitner didn't even scream or yell or anything when he was murdered. Literally the chillest dude ever. F

Overall super great, Elias is terrifying, let's dive into the next season!!! I've got 2 seasons to finish in like, less than 2 or so weeks(?) if I wana be caught up by season 5 hhhh,,,

Better get started I guess.