#also sorry i didnt know which album you were talking about so i just went with both of these

[kumezyzo]

streamer!gf is also a good idea i’d love to read

again, with this one, its mostly just for me [and this amazingly supportive anonymous] but i still felt like writing it. (although it took me three hours to come up with ideas that made sense lol) i also think this ones kinda ass in comparison to the others.... sorry.

but yea, this is streamer!gf that i tried to make gender neutral until the very end really.... enjoy! or dont.... :) m.list

bf!sapnap who most likely knew you from the SMP before you started dating. and only recently when he realized how much he liked you, did he start trying to pursue the relationship (which was maybe over a year and a half ago)

bf!sapnap who agreed with you to not say anything about the relationship for a few months just to let it sit and see where you guys lead

when you do finally announce it, its because you guys notice a genuince shift in the relationship where you can tell its getting more serious.

bf!sapnap who shyly brings up the idea of doing a relationship q&a on your channel after the announcement (that was also on your channel)

during the video, hes very clearly all over you, hugging you and leaning against you. your fans think its absolutely adorable how much of a simp he is.

in the middle of that video theres a moment when you two look at eachother after answering a question and it cuts to you two giggling and looking away from eachother. sapnap with a very clear blush and wide grin on his face mostly because you guys took a break to just kiss eachother which accidentally went on longer than expected

bf!sapnap who didnt realize how many people were already shipping you two when he called you the honourary dream team member once a few years ago

bf!sapnap that gets edits of you (sometimes you and him) during TNTL streams and just on his timelines and tries his hardest to not act flustered although he clearly has that glint in his eye

bf!sapnap who manages to come into your room during the most inconvenient times during your streams. ie. when youre actively and/or loudly simping over an actor in your fav movie or show.

you just freeze mid sentence, mid gesture, and stare at him as he steps into the room. he stares back and peeks his head into the frame and your chat proceeds to spam 'LMAOOOOO's

"can i help you....?"

".....so who were you yelling about-"

"Oh my- GET OUT😭!"

bf!sapnap who will very openly brag about dating you and just talk about dating you (he just wants people to know youre taken🤭)

"well im dating y/n"

"how does that have anything to do with vidcon-"

bf!sapnap who gets teased for not being as good of a gamer as you. and not having as many followers (because youre def. very popular) (i also imagine this next convo with george and dream laughing the entire time)

"sapnap, how does it feel having a girlfriend thats better at minecraft than you?"

"george, shut up."

"sapnap, hes not wrong. and doesnt she have more subscribers?"

"im literally never doing a manhunt again then."

"good, then we'll just have your girlfriend replace you"

bf!sapnap who jokingly suggests yout two starting an onlyfans where he posts videos of you two fucking (but he secretly really wants to). cause he has a whole album of pictures and videos of you two that he would be willing to post (if people pay for it obvi)

again, gimme suggestions and stuff. and show support for my sanity lol -Nony

[nanaminsonyfans]

╚»★«╝ Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire ╚»★«╝

a/n; the lack of cyberpunk x reader fics is appalling. anyways gay kerry eurodyne for christmas ur welcome. also this is post after giving up johnny specifically the sun ending. sorry of its shitty, i rarely write as a male reader and i hope i did okay! requests are open!!!

pairing: male!reader x kerry eurodyne (cyberpunk)

warnings; anal, male oral receiving, slight exhibition?, cursing, spoilers for end of cyberpunk.

—

The Kerry Eurodyne was making a Christmas album with US Cracks, him being main vocals and the girls being background vocals. You were there as Kerry's loving boyfriend and supporter but also because you had nothing else to do. Being the famous V merc has run its course and after everything with Johnny and Arasaka....you just wanted to be you, Y/n L/n. Of course you still talked to some old friends, Claire being one of them. Truth be told....You missed Johnny. A piece of you was gone.

"Y/n? Babe? You there?" Kerry's voice brought you back. The girls were gone leaving the two of you there. "You having one of those episodes again?" He asks softly, obviously worried. "Oh, no i'm fine. Was just thinking is all. The music was pretty soothing." You joke and stood up. "Was it? Didn't want to put you to sleep." "You didn't. Just started to remind me of stuff." Kerry nods and cupped your cheek. "This past year has been hard for you. I understand." You nod and leaned against his touch. His hands were always so warm.

"I gotta finish some vocals. Go get a drink." He hums softly. You nod, leaving and came back. Kerry was singing, however his vocals sounded almost angelic as he sang The Christmas Song. "Jack nipping at your nose~" He looked at you. He looked at you with those fucking icy blue eyes that just sucked you in every single time. You know what he wants. How'd he get so horny so easily? Sentimental one second...

You stared at him, watching his movement. He swayed his hips as he practically made out with the mic. You felt your jeans tightened as you wanted him until you couldnt take anymore and went in. "You're such a little shit sometimes...." You growl slightly in his ear, griping his hips as you pulled him against your growing bulge. "Yeah...?" Kerry hums, adding more pressure against you. You let out a guttural moan in his ear as he started to grind against you.

"You keep doing that and im going to cum in these fuckin' pants." "We can't have that." He hums and gets down on his knees. "Not when i have a perfectly good face." "Oh youre fucking bad Ker..." You groan as he undid your pants, your cock springing free seconds before he wrapped his mouth around you. His tongue was so soft and warm...and fuck the way he sucked you off was like his life depended in it. He was so eager to please and it was working.

Kerry's eyes were half lidded and staring up at you as if he was trying to be innocent. His hand took over whatever he couldn't reach. Drool slipped down his chin as he continued to suck. "Oh fuck ker...." You thrusted slightly in his mouth causing him to gag but he didnt want you to stop. You continued to face fuck him until you felt yourself getting close.

"Fuck..Fuck ker-" You pulled out and came on his face exactly as he wanted. "Mm...amazing as usual." He smirks and licked the cum up and cleaned himself up. "Now bend over." "Really? Here?" "Yes here its your fault." You tell him annoyed and Kerry did so, happily stripping down to give you a show. "Oh you fucking slut." You slapped his ass as he bent over on the couch in the studio.

You didnt even bother prepping and just thrusted in which earned a high pitched mewl from him. "Oh fuck- dont stop please." He begs and pushed his hips back to match the rhythm of your thrusts. His moans were so whiny it was pitiful, the sadistic side wanted to taunt him about it but another side of you loved his noises. Only you could bring these noises out if him, only you, only your cock.

You let out a few grunts as his ass milked you, and suddenly he let out a loud moan arching his back as you hit his prostate. He loved how the head of cock hit it just right. "Fill me up y/n please, please!" Kerry begs and he started to fist himself. "No one can say no to you." You smirk and started to rail him a few more times before you came together. "Fuuuck!" You groaned as you filled his ass making him whine at the feeling as he made a mess on the couch.

"You made a mess." You tease and kissed him which he happily returned. Out of the corner of you eye you noticed a blinking red light. "Did...did it record all of that?" You ask him and kerry took notice as well. "Yeah...maybe i should put it on the bonus track."

[graciegoeskrazy]

figure my heart out | PART 2

Matty Healy + Queer!Teen!Daughter!reader

warnings: coming out, language

a/n: you didn’t really think i’d leave u on read did you? cmon u know me better than that. in all honesty i didnt mean to split it into 2 parts but i just loved what i had written and wanted to get it out there asap. my bad whoopsies. AT LEAST I DIDNT LEAVE YALL HANGING FOR LONG RIGHT. i’m sorry for all the pain i caused. xoxo. ALSO THANK YOUNFOR ALL THE IIND COMMENTS AND LOVE U GUYS MAKE MY FUCKING DAY LIKE LITTERSLY MY DAD WAS SO SHIT IMAND YOU GUYS TURNED IT AROUND WITH UR REQUESTS AND COMMENTS I LOVENUUUUHU OKAY enjoy 😚

An hour had passed. No one had gone to bed or left including your aunt and uncles because they all were too worried about you. They tried to convince your father to follow you upstairs before things worsened, but he couldn't move. This was a life-changing moment for crying out loud, and he was the one who ruined it. He couldn’t get that out of his head. After a while of going back and forth with each other, Everyone had enough of your father’s bullshit and decided to get involved. George and Ross took it upon themselves to head up to your room. They weren't even sure if you were awake in the first place, but the faint music of Olivia Rodrigo’s Sour album was playing the the background which was a telltale sign you were awake. Awake, and not doing well. It was nearing 3 in the morning but on weekends like this, sleep didn’t exist in the Healy and company household. People were up and awake or blasting music or just doing things you would normally do when the sun is up, so everyone staying up and having an intervention of sorts was a normal thing. (Which makes you wonder why your curfew was 11 pm in the fucking first place) That’s another reason why George and Ross had no problem with knocking on your door. “Bubs? You in there?” George knew the answer. They both did, but they didn’t know how to start the conversation. You had just sent a goodnight text to your girlfriend. As soon as you got upstairs a while ago, you texted her saying that you needed to talk. Not even a full minute later she answered the phone and you told her everything. After getting you to calm down and promising you everything would be alright, she suggested that you get some rest, and that’s what you planned to do. Until your uncles knocked on your door.

“Bubs it's Me and Tallie. We need you to open up.”

You were so tired. You didn't want to deal with them or anyone. You just wanted sleep. So you didn’t answer. After a moment, Ross spoke. “Love, open the door, please. We just want to help you.” He gave a glance towards George when you didn’t reply. “Bubs, we love you. We only want to help. What your dad did was unfair, we know that, and we just want to stop it from getting worse.”

Ross added on, “We love you, y/n. It doesn't change how we feel about you. You’re still our baby and we still love you. Let us in, please.”

After thinking about it and coming to the conclusion of what more could go wrong you reached up from where you were sitting on the ground near the door, and let them in. Still not saying another word.

George found you first. He knelt in front of you and did some of the breathing exercises he taught you. Eventually, he helped you up onto the bed where Ross sat and you just fell into him. You cried into his chest as George closed the door and went around to the other side of the bed.

“You feeling better?” You nodded. Ross pressed a kiss to your head. “Good.” He said.

George scooted closer and smiled. ‘So…June, huh?”

Ross smiled and you cringed, “Oh my god, shut up.”

“What?! I’m not judging. I like vaginas too.”

At this point, Ross was a pool of laughter and as much as you hate to admit it you laughed a bit too.

“Oh my- just get out.” You said, cracking a smile.

“You gonna be okay?” Ross asked.

You solemnly nodded. “Yeah, I’m just gonna go to bed and see what happens tomorrow.”

George smiled, “One day at a time.”

You nodded.

They both pressed kisses to your head like they have done since you were little, and left the room, silently, closing the door.

…

The next morning, after some very much-needed rest, you woke up to the sun coming through your window. You sat there for a while, wishing it was still night and wishing June was right there with you. After a minute of snapping back to reality, there was a silent knock at the door. Matty peaked his head in and his eyes found yours. He was still in last night’s clothes, dress pants and all. “I’m sorry- did I wake you-”

“No. It’s fine I’ve been up.”

He just nodded. He cleared his throat before continuing. “Can I come in?” You didn’t expect this conversation to happen this early but it was clear that he got no sleep and had been preparing himself all night. You nodded. He came in and shut the door and sat on the edge of your bed. You lay back, resting against the headboard. He couldn’t meet your eyes, but finally did when he said, “I’m sorry.”

You showed a slight tight-lip smile.“I know.” You said.

He looked away again and sighed. “I didn’t mean for it to happen like this, I just…”

“For what to happen?”

“You coming out.”

Your head tilted in confusion, “Wait- you knew this would happen?”

He shrugged as if it was nothing. “Well, not this but yeah, love.”

You crawled forward and sat next to him by the edge of your bed. “Are you kidding?” You yelled.

“No. I’ve known you liked boys and girls since you were in primary school.”

This bitch. You stood up with wide eyes and stared at your dad. “You knew I liked both!?!”

He smiled. “Remember the first time you got drunk at a party?”

“No?”

“Exactly. You came home super drunk from June’s house and while I was helping you sober up and get ready for bed you told me you had a crush on June. That you liked her and wanted to marry her.” He smiled at the thought.

You were shocked to say the least. “Wh-why didn’t you say anything? Or yell at me for being drunk!”

“Because you’re a teenager. I wanted you to have fun.”

You rolled your eyes and sat back down, of COURSE he knew I was queer of course. Sometimes I wish he didn’t know me this fucking well. “Oh my gosh.”

“You thought I believed you were going to ‘study sessions’? I’m not dumb, love. I used to make the same excuses. Plus, I didn't think I’d have to worry about teen pregnancy if you were having sex with a girl.”

“Dad!” You said, slapping his arm.

“Sorry.” You covered your eyes in embarrassment and shock.

“I wanted you to live your life. And figure out who you are before you tell me anything. I wanted you to feel comfortable coming to me and trust me.”

You sat up. “I’ve always trusted you. It’s just June isn’t exactly out yet to her family so it’s comp-“

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me.” He said, smiling, and putting a hand on your knee.

“I’m sorry, I yelled,” he said.

“You don’t have to be sorry. I’m sorry I lied and stayed past curfew.”

“It’s alright.” He said, patting your knee.

He looked at you and took your face in his hands. “I love you. No matter who you love.”

You smiled “I love you most.”

[straykats]

kat talks: 5-star

tldr; it did not take long at all for this comeback to grow on me i love it so much. i find that with most new songs my first listen is always very apathetic and/or ??? LOL and there exists only a small handful of songs that i immediately was like oH MY GOD (this is across all artists i listen to) but yeah i always forget that when listening to new music and i think this comeback is the first time i fully acknowledged that my first listen is rarely (and doesnt need to be) instant likesies. theres a lot of small bits throughout the album that remind me of other songs (not a bad thing, just smth i noticed i kept noticing?). topline, dlc, the sound and time out were/are my favs hehe (update: relistening to the album again and collision and fnf are creeping up to my favs too help)

hall of fame

okay im pretty sure i've heard this in my brief listen before but i also dont remember it at all

i cant describe it but that alien-sounding melody actually has me seeing like a weird alien brainwashing thing

WHOS FUCKING-- WAS THAT JEONGIN??? AT 1:24???? that was so pretty i want that framed

during hyunjins bit i got weird b me flashbacks??? i dont think it sounds similar but my mind immediately went 'b me !!'

jesus felix

the moon landing audio is such a cool inclusion,,, 5 star,,, hall of fame,,, a star/celestial body themed comeback,,,,

s-class

okay wbk i was so confused the first time round but its grown sm on me

i LOVE the power of the opening

the cartoon boing/spring sound and (its not but) the tom and jerry running sound hehe

this song definitely sounds.. grand? and wide? and a good title track

"[im] up above the world so high" nice nice twinkle twinkle reference hehe

i absolutely love jeongin's bit in the bridge and i love the choreo of it too

item

i love the game sounds they use in this hehe

seungmin's prechorus reminds me of smth but i cant place what it is

felixs ... tone? like? the voice he uses???

hyunjin/changbin bit in the bridge >>>>> i cant explain it but it sounds so good

super bowl

the instrumental at the beginning took me by surprise.. i also am sitting ehre trying to identity the?? The Sound. digital/synth. like the almost cowbell almost snare one. ive replayed it so many times.

i thought this when i first heard it (while doing the dishes lol) but is this song all in english?

whats that sound between 'have a bite' and 'make it mine'

screams TFDGVJABVAD the whisper im sorry i cant do it HAHAHAHAHA

topline

to be mad honest i was SO excited for this based on just the teaser

'we skedaddle intoxicated razzle dazzle' best line fr

okay ik i didnt say much for this one but its one of my favs

underground rebellious kinda vibes i love it (i described that wrong but i have a very specific img in my head)

dlc

im trying to play this on the pino and its driving my nuts but in a good way

the 'amudo moreuge' line throughout the entire song is so [deep breaths] like i cant explain it but it BUT AHHHHHH (fun fact for any pokemon people LOL the song oracion has the same kinda thing in it. idk what to call it.)

oh i LOVE love the piano during the second verse AHHHHHHHHH not gonna be able to replicate it but thats okay

the song/chorus has a.. an urban tropical feel? like it's ALMOST something you would hear with a tropical background but smth about the key, maybe, plavces it instead in an urban setting at night (bc lyrics) and seems kinda bittersweet

THATS WHAT THE AMUDO MOREUGE LINE DOES it adds such a sad kinda tired/resigned feel to the song which is like. on one hand the lyrics are so 'lets dance like crazy without a care in the world' but on the other hand the song feels so lonely and kind of. 'don't worry about me, i'll manage my sadness alone'??? like, 'let's have fun together but i'm really sad even though i'm smiling' kinda thing ARGHHHHH

get lit

seungmin's line rmeinds me of smth ARGHH its another skz song i know that for sure but i cant remember which one (ngl a lot of the songs in this album have parts that remind me of another kpop song,,, one of the above reminded me of nct but icr which song)

oh wait i think its my pace @ seungmins line

the instrumental would be so cool for mashups etc

wait one of the lines is 'today im so cocky' which is interesting bc theres a previous line (sueprbowl?) thats about not being cocky or smth HMMM i would revisit but tbh i cbb rn rip

collision

tRUMPETTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT... i think

trumpets reminded me of maknae on top and this song also suits jeongin's voice sm i love it here

oh??? the ringing at the end???

fnf

this REMINDS ME OF SMTH TOO an dits not kpop

but i do really like it

'ashes up in the sky' ,,,, thinkingthinkingthinking

this feels like the opposite of time out and idk how to explain it

lix singing !!!!!! i love it sm

WAIT THSI ONE ACTUALLY REMINDS ME OF B ME wait no or is it levanter

the flaura and fauna line also reminds me of venom

both of the above points refer to the melody ,, seungmin's venom prechorus "cant escape-" and then it jumps The Other Song which i cant figure out what it is AHH

was that an eagle did i just hear an eagle

the minho/chan ending is so <3 <3 <3

youtiful

the muted piano i [crying] also almost gives me knnw vibes

'must be an oracle' ????? trying to understand this. like. it must be predicting smth,, but what,,, 'look at the stars fall / they leave the sky, goodbye' which part of this is the oracle i-- ad oracle as in like a person or a message but either way

if anyone covers this song please use a xylophone or marimba hehe would be so <3

oh i can see this second verse being animated so beautifully

why did changbin singing at the end make me so incredibly soft

the sound

okay this song has been out for ages but i think the only thing i said about it was smth about the bass and also how it sounds like a 'final stand' kinda song

okay ngl i liked the jpn lyrics better for the chorus oopsies im sorry

the piano sounds so RAW like the ringing of it the way the key falls and the mallet hits the string like you can HEAR it like thats exactly how it sounds when you play that high on a piano and also like. imo i notice the sound more on older pianos and just bc of that personal association (???) this song gets a bit sadder

adding to the 'final stand' feel is the police sirens in the chorus

time out

i just love this song sm man like idk what to say at this point

OH IT REMINDS ME OF A DEEMO SONG AHHAHA WAIT LEMME FIND IT // this song omg i've never thought about it before but listening to time out just then, i literally went 'you ready?' and then i was like WAIT THATS A DIFFERENT SONG

this song would be such a fun end-of-concert/encore song woah

yeah no i really dont have much to say i just love this song sm

[chelleztjs18]

Hello you mrs. traveling iced coffee drinker honey nut cheerio lefty eyebag 😌

How are you this morning? I'm not sure if you guys have left Oklahoma or have already arrived in CA, but I hoped you guys had a safe flight! 😅 hopefully not much troubles during the TSA stuff.

I've read the fic before. I'm really not a big fan of dark Wanda lol I can't see her as evil, even after MoM, I can't see her as the villain. But I like the story! I like how you incorporated the stuff from the movie. Although, I did wonder back then if you were going to make a part 2.

Yeah I'm on wattpad, but not very much. The people I follow haven't posted much. But I found your stories on tumblr. I don't remember how though.

I'll give them a listen. Do you have a favorite album by Glass Animals?

For your questions about my crush, I should really say crushes ahahaha but they are from real life and tiktok. I think I have a tumblr crush too, but I'm not sure yet.

That's cute. I'm like your husband. When I was with my ex wife, I would always sing to her when I bring her breakfast. Or when I'm being silly.

Any big plans for the day when you're in CA?

-CuriousGeorge

Hello corn-punn!

Hahha it's funny that u used ice coffee drinker nickname today.. because this morning it was like 20 degree outside n i ordered cold brew with salted caramel foam . N i was so happy because it was so good.

So we woke up at 4am to get ready but my flight got delayed. It was supposed to be at 8am n it was delayed to 1h40minutes. The Oklahoma airport was surprisingly not that busy. I wrote a bit in flight but then fall asleep for like 20minutes.

Anyway, how r u? Hows ur day today? Sorry for the late reply..it was a very very busy day. Spent time with the family, been talking with the in laws n i finally got some time alone just now.

We got here like 10.40. N we got at my in laws at 1.15. Im so tired right now..

N the weather here is so much warmer but we brought mostly warm clothes, i can only pray it will be cold. I hv vbeen sneezing. I think it's because the extreme difference of the temperature. I was in 15 degree this morning n end up in 70ish sunny weather. N on christmas here it says it will 80 degree.. 😩😫

Haha yeah i got what u meant.. i never see her as villain either but not gonna like, dark wanda / scarlet witch is hot.. 😅🤣 n i love that kind of dark fic that has obsession or stalking or jealousy in it. I like movies like that too.

I dont think i would make pt. 2 for that fic.. i actually have another my own idea and i have 2 more requests of dark fics wanda. So i probably gonna scratch my own. Haha. Or atleast postpone mine for a while.

Ah i see. Im in wattpad too n i havent really update there.

I havent really listen to all their albums but i know some of my favorite songs which i think they r from different albums.

1. Gooey Rework

2. Gooey

3. Youth

4. Your Love (Déjà Vu) and this one inspired me an idea of a fic which i havent write it yet.😅

5. Tangerine (with Arlo Parks)

6. Hazey

Ouh about ur crush... interesting! It gets my attention! 🤭😆 okay, so currently u have a crush with multiple people? Or some of them r past crush?

Alsooooo... u have tumblr crush?? N what do u mean with u r not sure yet? Why? (Sorry for the rows of questions. U dont have to answer it if u dont want to. Didnt meant to cross the line or anything.)

Wow, u sound like a romantic person.. that's adorable.. i would prefer small gestures like that than any jewelry money can buy.. 😊

Since i answered this too late. Im just gonna tell u, how was my day whn i got here.

I bought lunch from the chinesse place near where i used to live before we went to my in laws (we used to live like 5 minutes away driving) then i have been talking n talking with the in laws. We catched up. N we went for dinner with the brothers, nephews,his parents n his mom's husband, one of the family friend also came to see us n joined the dinner. There were 12 of us. We had pizza but i ordered spicy wings and spaghetti meatballs. Was gonna order spumoni ice cream but i forgot.😒🙄 i was craving it.

I bet u r asleep now but feel free to leave me next questions? N i will reply as soon as i can.

Cheerio!

[lock-my-feelings-in-a-jar]

what do you think of Tom Keifer's solo album?

omg you reminded me to listen to it because i havent yet and i was going to until iron maiden swept me away to a different planet.

as soon as i saw your ask i started listening to the 'rise' album and then there's 'the way life goes' in the playlist after that that i havent heard yet either.

i'm holding off on posting this until i hear them all sorry for the wait.

its very different from cinderella but u can tell that voice [typed this part while listening to Rise, 7 songs in]

'breaking down' is one that i probably wouldn't recognize if i didn't know it was him. still good for what it is!

omg i love his voice at the beginning of 'taste for the pain'. i wouldn't recognize it as him in that one either.

and now i can tell its him again in 'life was here'. i love how different he sounds and goes back and forth between the 2 voices. also great song.

'you believe in me' is so slow and relaxing, i could take a nap and have this playing the whole time and sleep better than a baby.

ok my playlist switched to 'the way life goes' album now and i already like 'solid ground' as soon as it started. he said shelter, IS THAT A REFERENCE? (probably not because its a common word anyway).

'a different light'. is this gonna be one of those albums where i just like every track more than the last? probably because i love this one too, a lot. HE HAS SUCH A GOOD VOICE i love him.

'its not enough' IS GOOD TOO. i like the last song better but its still good.

'cold day in hell' i can already tell is one that will get stuck in my head if i keep listening to it. looooove!

'thick and thin' is so cute omg

'ask me yesterday' aww his voice. he almost sounds like a country singer in this one.

'fool's paradise' good song, i could see some parts of this getting stuck in my head too.

'the flower song', just the name sounds cute alone. aww im picturing the beginning lyrics. omg its such a good song i love this. AWWW, ALL OF THE LYRICS! and now i'm imagining his cute self singing it. this is my favorite so far of all of them.

'mood elevator' is he singing about his own face?? it sure elevates my mood. this album is also a mood elevator.

'welcome to my mind' thanks tom glad to be here. nice song. theyre all so different from each other and i love it.

'you showed me' another cute song, aw. great voice. i like when he goes higher and higher than then u hear his signature voice sound a little bit at the top.

'ain't that a bitch' nice name. another good song.

'the way life goes' another favorite so far but i still like the flower song best.

'babylon' some parts of this reminds me of bon jovi tbh. good song.

duet version of 'nobody's fool', i already like that song but its interesting to hear a different version. always gonna prefer the cinderella version but this one's not bad. lots of differences.

'a little help from my friends' omg. i love this song i didn't know he did a version of it! it sounds so good, he did such a good job. im so proud of his cute face rn.

SO looking back, i like 'the way life goes' album better than 'rise' and the flower song is my top favorite, 10/10 would listen to all again.

rise is still good but itssss.. like for a specific mood??

these were all of what were on his spotify page that i tossed into a playlist a while back so hopefully i didnt just make a big list of songs that you werent even talking about.

[snobgoblin]

"which may cause me to ramble about how Russel's posession is an excellent metaphor for mental illness" please do

right off the bat, content warnings for dark themes, tw in the tags

Not sure where to start. I guess I'll start off with this note here

This is probably the most obvious part of this metaphor. The demons literally force him to throw himself in the sea. During this time, Russel had taken time off to write an album by himself, but he suffered from hallucinations and self worth issues which eventually caused him to give up, and Del being reaped was kinda the final push. He lost his last friend. After he lost his daughter, and everything else. He was completely alone with his thoughts, and his pain, and his demons, with no way out except death.

So, he went for his only way out. But it didnt work. I know the feeling.

The giant thing, I think, is that feeling after your first break. Not your first mental breakdown, I mean, when you really just lose it for the first time. Afterward you feel so big, like you're just floating endlessly in the ocean. Nobody to hear you, nobody that cares.

Until he got harpooned. He got punished for his attempt.

Then he got caged. Studied. Almost like psychiatrists trying to figure out what's wrong with you. He was just.. completely naked, gigantic, with people he didn't know staring at him in a glass dome day in and day out. I mean- if you know you just know really.

But over time, it started to wear off. Once he wasn't floating around in his pain, he started to shrink. He started to get a bit better. And eventually he was let go. He was free to go back to his family

ok this is not gonna be coherent

Let's go back to when he was a kid.

The Excorcise Bike. He was told that if he exercised, the demons would go away.

At this point he was banned from school because they were afraid of him. Because of the first time he got posessed. Put a pin in that.

But this priest (? iirc) promised him that if he just exercised, the demons would go away, everything would be better, and he would be allowed to go to school again. All it did was make him afraid, ashamed. He got into school again, but he was treated as a hazard in the process

Because of his first break. iirc he was a teen? or a kid maybe, but either way that's when a lot of things start to manifest- anyway

One mistake was all it took for him to be seen as a monster. And it wasnt even his fault, he was literally posessed

Likely, schizophrenia, specifically. But this also works for a whole lot of things. He shows symptoms of OCD, PTSD, depression, and a whole bunch of other shit (+ religious trauma), all because of this possession. Not to mention when a lot of my shit was starting to manifest I literally thought I was posessed by demons??

Anyway point is, Russel has mental health issues, a lot of them, and the demons offer a nice visual metaphor, i am so sorry if this didnt make sense i have a tendency to be vague and assume you know what I'm talking about

[briankang]

how did u get into skz and what were the highlights of your time with them so far? also do u have a bias line? or is it just chan? also why chan?

omg ok so!!

i actually vaguely knew about them back in 2019 when around my pace came out and my friends tori and ayanna and i were like AYO THIS SLAPS??? and i added it to my spotify but i wasn’t into kpop as much at the time so i sorta forgot about them for a bit. then like. late 2020 early last year a gc i was in (which. lol) started getting into them and me like oh that’s cool! i distinctly remember them showing me chris and bambam on the survival show and them being like YOU KNOW BAMBAM EXISTS??? and me, who had liked got7 since 2015, like yeah! and me being like. ok but who is this he’s so cute 👀👀👀 and over time they showed me some content every once in a while and i was like oh they’re neat!!! the winter is coming eps and the goddamn. skz up all night videos are distinct to me. anyways it was around gods ddu du ddu du and their final kingdom performance i started to PROPERLY dig in and the day they performed wolfgang changed my fucking life. it was 6 am i hadn’t slept and i saw christopher chan bang flip in and then DO THAT WHOLE SHIRTLESS BIT and decided right then and there to buy their bubbles and stan then forever i never looked back DBWKEJWJEJNDN.

HIGHLIGHTS…..def when hyunjin came back, the release of noeasy. not to be annoying but talking to chris on video call literally changed my life bc i didn’t even enter into a raffle knowingly i just bought my scars albums and then it. it just happened i almost cried TRHEISJSJSJ. he was soooo kind like. it was only 30 seconds but he was just. ugh. so handsome and the fact that he got flustered when i said he looked nice fhejeehejjwjw and us just. chatting like two friends like i was sooooo nervous leading up and then he came up and i felt soooo at ease? the way he looked genuinely like ☹️ that we had to hang up and was like “times up ☹️☹️☹️ see you next time????” and looked rlly hopeful about it like. it lives rent free IM SORRY I DIDNT MEAN TO GO ON ABOUT THIS DHSHSBSJS HE JUST!!!! it will never leave me ive never felt so lucky 💕💕💕💕 however mostly recent highlights have been hanging out with you guys and making friends like genuinely that’s been so fucking fun and i love you guys im so bad at replying unless we talk every day sometimes and can be kinda shy but everyone is SO kind i love stayblr. i also watched the fanmeet and streamed oddinary with tori and ayanna when it came out and that was so. fucking fun idk it was v warm i love being able to share what i love with my friends and not feel bad about it dhsbshwjsj

god. ok so im a libra (chris and i are two days apart actually, two years too it’s fun to me hehehee) and have never been able to pick just one bias bc im indecisive LMAO rn i consider it chris, minho, and felix and hyunjin. minho was not originally here. in fact i used to think he was so weird and didn’t care for his vibes but over time i truly did like warm up to him esp having his bubble. i find him so endearing and the way he just. cares is so subtle and sweet and his humor dhwgejwhjwj i didnt intend to love him like this. felix was an originally top boy tho but. as i always say. if u don’t like felix that’s a red flag like he’s nothing but kindness and warmth. hyunjin was also originally higher in my line!!! his talent is soooo incredible and idk he’s just so cute and silly and passionate and romantic. idk i think we would be besties!!!

oh christopher though. truly cannot explain the love i have for that boy it’s EMBARRASSING like. idk what it is but like that dude came into my life and nothing had been the same RHWJWSHASJSJ like he’s just so. he’s just SOME GUY RIGHT. but like. in the way you’ve KNOWN a guy like that who’s v sweet and well intentioned but awkward and silly. like a dude you were friends with or went to school with. idk that’s what i love about him like he talks about songs he loves or things he did back in the day and im like “wow we would’ve gotten along so well in school like we deadass would’ve been friends and i would’ve had a massive crush on him” RHWHEEHWJEJW like. he is just so kind and FUNNY and passionate and hardworking and just. the way he loves the Kids. ugh it just pulls at my heart and he’s so talented like the way he can literally do everything. the way he’s open with his struggles is so UGH and the way he gets flustered over everything is so cute to me and how he acts cute to everyone and just. idk i want him to succeed and always have good days and all of that. also he is so handsome oh my god like. AND cute like he does both i wish he believe that he was as good looking as he actually is. anyways i love him in a normal way a normal amount.

[i8jisoo]

𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐘 𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐒 ⇉  skz with pregnant!reader 

bangchan x reader | first part of dad!skz

↬ genre; fluff & a tinge of angst

↬ warnings; pregnancy, birth, talk of vomiting, and lots of cursin

↬ notes; fuck i love bangchan sm and im excited dis the first part of daddy!skz o whateva

from the moment he knew, he honestly was scared at first and just wanted to pretend like he wasn’t going to be a father

he needed time to evaluate it all, he was honestly confused and scared, he was nervous and doubtful of his parenting skills and providing eighteen years + many years after for his child

u were nervousssss as helllllllllllllll to tell him what was up

“well, i’m- y’know- baby?” you tried to get out, ur words were hella scrambled and he was confused before he came to the realization of what you meant 

silence which is vv concerning 

u knew this was a shot in the dark sorta, u two weren’t even public on the relationship let alone public about a pregnancy?

u guys ended up taking a break for about a month, really not knowing what to say to each-other

u two were afraid, which was normal, u just rly didn’t expect it from chan of all people to walk away from u

anybody else u could expect,, but this?? this was unlike him & u were more scared by that

he wound up at your place, box in hands

(u were kinda at ur breaking point bc u thought he was returning ur things)

(newsflash it was his stuff)

“i’m sorry, i just— being a father? being a parent, i don’t.. i don’t know anything about it, but nobody does when they become one. so, i’m gonna figure it out with you.”

going through the first sonograms w him & crying a lot while u two talked about the future

ur hormones r going to be the death of chan

u are 0-100 holy mooolyy

hes very careful with his choice of words and how he delivers them, not wanting to upset you

chans first present for the baby is a kangaroo, with a matching little joey 🥺

he also is surprisingly a very big fan of kanga from winnie the pooh, which he buys winnie the pooh stuff for the baby JSJSJSJSJJS just bc kanga & roo remind him of u n the baby 🥺🥺🥺🥺 (i rly need to stop)

u were a lil big, having a cute big bump to pair with ur pregnancy, the inevitable announcement was needed to happen if u were ever going to step outside again

chan rly didnt want to announce it bc he didnt know what peoples reactions would be :(

he knew he was only twenty-seven so some people might think it was a bit too early to have kids, but he thought it was perfect the way it was

u guys hid it until u couldn’t, sparking little rumors of ur pregnancy but u both decided not to confirm them

chan obsessing and literally worshipping you in your third trimester

u in his shirts? he was fuckin over

kisses and cuddling all the time, no matter how tired u were or he was, u two would either fall asleep while doing so or lay there for awhile before u were like

“ok i gotta pee, help me up!!”

no but frfr this baby was torturing u the last stretch of ur pregnancy

it seemed that anything u ate either made u throw up or gave u heartburn

ur stretchmarks were getting worse & it seemed like u were getting bigger everyday

u were very insecure the last months, just cause a lot of comments were talking about a bit of weight gain in ur face, which fuck,, u would never be hurt by some comments but with ur hormones and KNOWING u have put on weight, u rly didn’t feel the same

ofc chan knows whats up and hes there to tell u some r e a l s h i t

“okay, yes. you have put on weight, but you’re pregnant. that’s the good thing about it, you’re healthy okay? whether you had a small bump and no extra weight put on or a big bump and extra weight put on, you are carrying a baby. you can lose the weight when it’s over, right? you don’t need to feel this way, okay? i’m the only one who you should listen to about your appearance, i’m here to tell you the truth. you are beautiful. you are the morher of my child, that’s what you are. you’re not ugly, or fat, you’re not anything bullshit that people say to you.”

when u started crying, chan panicked

“nononononoono, don’t cry baby!”

his arms were wrapped around you so tightly, feeling your face pressed against his shoulder and your arms around his neck

“i love you.” u would be rly quiet and his heart would break at the sound but ur i love you, he just— it was so real and he’d never felt like this before

“love u too.” he’d say that shit so proudly and kiss the TOP OF UR HEAD SO SOFTLY 🥺🥺🥺

when u finally went into labor, u were like wow this hurts a F U CK TOO NNN

u woke up to the bedsheets soaked underneath u, pins n needles were all u could feel

u kinda sat there for ten minutes, scaring urself n making urself nervous when u started doubting yourself and feeling the pain become stronger

ur hands were s hh aa kkyy

u would tap chan so softly and feel a little frustrated he didnt wake up but like how tf was he supposed to feel that 😳

u kinda started crying now because u were STRESSED and him not waking up (no shit ur little tap wasnt gonna work but) it felt like he was gonna sleep forever

so ur hands pressed on chan’s shoulders, shaking them a little bit and letting out a,

“chris?” which ur voice was quiet as hell, shaky as hell, and wavering as you whispered to him

him opening his eyes to see your teary ones n hes just so sad that his heart drops 🥺

he never wakes up quicker though and hes sitting up fast as fuck

“what? what’s wrong?”

ur literally sobbing and hes freaked out by this because u have never cried like this

he kinda just wants to go back to bed since ur just crying but he knows smth is probably wrong because ur SOBBING so

“my water broke.”

now its his turn to be nervous cause fuck he is feeling so unprepared

he said fuck shoes on u, slipping u into his own clothes and helping u into the car so u two could go

did i forget to mention the hospital was an hour away 😳

he wants to pull over hearing u whine n grip his hand, noticing ur quietness and ur little mumbles everytime u rest ur head back after a contraction

he doesn’t give a fuck, he will carry u into the hospital and then put u in a wheelchair from the entrance so u don’t have to walk

u have a feeling maybe hes more nervous than u but atm ur fuckin close to losing it over the pain

u two are settled into a room, epidural done and just trying to make u comfortable now

u were seven centimeters which u still had to wait but u both knew u were close to meeting ur baby

when u are at ten centimeters though, chan is just a ball of tears and he’s just so proud of you

your hand was in his the whole time, chan’s lips near ur ear and he’s just whispering for u to concentrate on him and how much u wanna meet the baby

“i—i can’t do it!” 🥺🥺

you were honestly so drained and ur forehead was laced with sweat, ur hands sweaty and shaking in his own from being nervous and slowly becoming weaker as u put ur strength into pushing

“baby, you are probably what? three pushes, maybe you can cut it to one and a half. alright? you can do this baby, we’re so close to meeting our baby.”

that’s all u needed n chan knew it

surprise surprise,, chan was right about one and a half

“it’s a boy!!” which chan would press his lips to yours so quickly, u two crying and letting out watery laughs as your baby boy cried 🥺

he hasn’t felt this much pride and love since debut or releasing an album or tour, he couldn’t express how gifted he was to have deserved the gift of being a father

ofc they introduce you both to kangaroo care, chan so ready to take off his shirt and feel his baby boy’s skin against his own warm skin and he did so

then it was ur turn to hold him the same way, chan asking u if he could pull down ur gown so u could hold him like he did

that was the picture he needed, snapping it and getting you holding the baby against your naked (ofc ur gown was covering ur breasts) chest, your son sleeping soundly with his hands pressed against you

u two were parents now, u both had learned about pregnancy together and now u two were going to explore parenthood together

©️ maysdiors 2020 :: all rights reserved. do not repost my work on tumblr or other platforms.

[7wanderingpaws]

He Loves Love (3/3)

Pairing: Baekhyun x reader

Genre: solo singer! AU

Word count: 4K+

Warnings: none! just a playful Baek!

--- Please make sure to read the the notes at the end! ---

Masterlist

tags: @iloveagain​ @buttercupbbh​ @wooya1224​ @baekberrie​ (sorry if I left out someone? its been ages since i updated and I didnt know if its okay to tag those who commented on chap. 2 :( didnt want to be rude ><)

1 <<< 2 <<< 3

It was the day of the release. The release of his magazine cover.

The PR went… mad.

“Listen, sweetie, editor, I don't think we will have enough pieces. The damn thing is literally going to be sold out in a matter of hours.”

You received this call before lunch time. Lunch time was very early on in the day. So why was Baekhyun's magazine cover about to be sold out in the entirety of Korea on the same day of the release date?

“Erm, yeah about that. I am an editor, just like you said. You need to call the-”

“I know, I know,” she interrupted but there wasn't an inch of impatience in her voice. “What I am trying to say is - congratulations! You did a great job!”

It took you a moment to realize what she was saying, because she was right. Your participation in this issue was big; after all you took care of the props and settings and you were looking over his pictures during the photoshoot. Out of nowhere, your heartbeat sped up. “Oh, thank you! That's very kind of you, but I still need to improve a lot-”

In that moment, the happy ding! that never failed to make you all trembly and nervous, sounded on your desk.

Waiter: miss editor am I seeing correctly????? wowow ihavenowords

Waiter: did you just make me sell out your magazine?????? ihavenowords

Waiter: did you save yourself at least one piece??? huhuuhuhuuu ihavenowords ><

Waiter: i think someone just made themselves a good name in the mag industry ^^ congratulations!!!

Waiter: does that mean i will get to see you? hmmm maybe to give a congratulatory bouquet of flowers???? 🤭🤭🤭 🌹💐🌺

Biting your lip quickly to suppress the happy grin, you quickly attended to the phone call, chatting a bit more with the PR lady. Honestly, you didn't like to talk to them much as they were all over the place, too demanding and didn’t have a great understanding of a creative mind. Thankfully, you didn't have to deal with them too often.

It hadn't been that long since your last meeting with Baekhyun. His kisses on your cheek and one kiss on your forehead seemed to be still burning on your skin, sometimes making you drag the pad of your index finger over the mentioned places, needing some sort of closure from him that you had yet to receive. 

Texting now was a full on habit between you, causing you to become sad, disappointed and even anxious if he wouldn’t reply that soon, worried he changed his mind about you, and his feelings towards you. Because even though you admitted to him that you liked him, he was being still very cautious, still very polite with you, as if there was some sort of invisible line between you two that he was scared to cross, for some reason.

Trying to look at it from his point of view, there were many risks of him wanting a relationship with you, and you couldn't not agree. If anything, you were being thankful for his thoughtfulness and carefulness, for if he messed up even the tiniest bit around you and your secret meetings of a blooming start of a relationship, he would not see the end of the hate, and neither would you. Heck, his career was on the line.

You managed to reply to his playful messages that went on and on, before you would have to dive into another cover magazine plan that you had to start thinking through.

Me: I think I should congratulate YOU! the most wanted man in Korea it seems ;)

Me: these days i have some important meetings… an upcoming cover… im definitely doing overtime today :( when is it good for you? I will try to arrange my schedule with yours

Waiter: ohoh the most wanted man you say? i wonder if the one i want wants me just as much…….???

Waiter: i would like to see you more often before my album drops, you know i will get quite busy and not seeing you for too long doesnt seem to work well with me anymore ><

Waiter: sooo… i will come pick you up from work tonight just shoot me a msg *^

Just as his messages could make your heartbeat go into a crazy overdrive, it seemed he could also make it completely stop. Or so you thought. His flirting and now his proposal to pick you up gave you a huge shock. That would be a first for sure.

Me: sure! have your phone with you Mr Korea

Me: I wonder too if that person wants you as much ;)

You decided not to pay him any more attention after that as much as you were tempted. Your belly was levitating along with your body, feeling high on vitamin Baekhyun. Pressing down the urge to tease him, you put your phone away, your hands slightly trembly from the attention you kept receiving from someone like him.

If your predictions were even close to correct, you wanted to tell him: yes, the one that he wanted, wanted him just as much.

…

You were fast to leave your work that day. Excited butterflies were eating your insides away, and the only way to make them calm down was to finally meet the person who always made their wings flutter.

Baekhyun was already parked in the underground parking lot, his car the only one with the motor on - and the only car of his class. You spotted him sitting in his car in his white jersey shirt, his left elbow propped on the windowsill as his index finger was stuck between his teeth, gnawing at it. When he saw you, he took a double-take and quickly changed his posture which made you giggle.

Baekhyun was following you with his eyes, going even to the length of leaning in over the passenger seat so as not to lose sight of you until he reached over and opened the passenger door for you so you could slide in.

“Why, thank you,” you smiled cheerfully as you sat down. You closed the door and put your bag down in between your legs.

“My pleasure,” he said back with a pleasant smile. “Hand me the bag, I'll put it in the backseat.”

You quickly did as he asked and then reached for your seatbelt.

“How was work today? We should celebrate!” he exclaimed as he put the car into drive and made his way out of the parking lot.

You hummed, gnawing on your lip. “That would be wonderful,” you said but hesitated about offering anything further. It was difficult to read the situation; you wouldn't know what you could afford to do with him and what not; what would be stepping over the line and what wouldn't. But Baekhyun said he liked you. In fact, he even told you to look at him like at any other man. That meant you shouldn't doubt all the possible hang-out ideas you had, right?

“I think it is you who deserves a gift,” you murmured and stole a look at his concentrated face. You reached the outside now, the dark evening slowly changing into night, the light of passing cars illuminating your faces.

“Hmm, I think so, too. Something in lines of - I can pick whatever I want, huh?”

Hiding your smile behind your hand, you nodded. “Yes, I can grant something. But don't make it expensive. Even though you sold out our magazine, it doesn't mean I will get a pay rise right away.”

“Oh, it won't include any monetary value,” he promised and turned to look at you when he stopped at the red light, the line in front of you seemingly going on for at least a mile. “It would be something you can and should be able to do freely.”

Despite the darkness of the car, Baekhyun could still spot that gorgeous, astounding blush colouring your cheeks. He really grew to love it; to make you so flustered you couldn't help but grow all red, just for him. “What do you think?” he asked quietly, still observing you with a small lopsided smile.

First you looked at your connected hands in your lap and then looked up at him through your lashes. “Depends what it is, but I owe you, so…” you trailed off.

He chuckled quietly, causing your heart to skip a beat before he started driving again, the line in front slowly moving. “Wonderful.”

Within forty-five minutes, you found yourself seated in a Korean restaurant, both yours and Baekhyun's shoes left at the entrance. Baekhyun, knowing the owner, asked for a separate room where people usually held business dinners, to ensure you would have full privacy and could enjoy each other.

It was a bit mind-blowing how much he could just do. His authority was admirable but at the same time it reminded you how you could hardly compare. If you would have asked the owner to give you a separate room, you might have had to fight for it or give him some money. Baekhyun seemed to walk in like a prince, confidently talking to people as if it was so natural.

“Can you give me a moment?” he asked suddenly, already standing up. “I forgot something in the car. Choose a meal until then.”

You nodded and saw him shuffling towards the door. Quickly going through the menu, you were thankful it was just an ordinary Korean restaurant that specializes in noodle soups and wasn't pricey. Picking the one that seemed the most special, you put the menu away just in time for Baekhyun to return back. His right hand was behind his back, obviously hiding something.

He had a sheepish smile on his face as he stepped towards you and handed you a beautiful bouquet of colourful flowers, the smell of which instantly hit your nose. You felt your mouth stretch into a wide smile as you stood up to your feet.

“Oh my god, what is this for, Baekhyun?” you asked, looking up into his eyes just to find them sparkling with anticipation.

“I know I never asked you out on an official date, so I might not be dressed up to my best potential, but I really wanted to give you something and today, as I said, I wanted to give you a bouquet. Please, accept it,” he added breathily, watching you with bated breath, nudging the flowers out to you.

You giggled and he smiled right away as you took the bouquet in your hand, careful as to not hold his fingers that were still curled around the stems. “Thank you.”

As you wanted to pull back, he leaned in, grabbing your wrist gently that was holding the flowers, bringing you closer. His lips hovered over your cheek and he eventually pressed them there. “Good job on your first cover,” he murmured and leaned away the slightest to watch your surprised reaction. Your eyes were watching his mouth and he had to restrain himself from going any further. He didn't want to cross the line. Not yet.

Unfortunately, you had to separate when the doors opened and the waiter came in. She was taken aback for the slightest of moments when she noticed you and Baekhyun backing away from each other but both of you recovered quickly and sat down, ready to order.

“This Vietnamese noodle soup is my favourite,” mentioned Baekhyun, looking at you. “So that is your gift to me - eating my favorite food with me.”

…

It was late June, the beginning of the most humid weeks of the year with the monsoon season around the corner.

Baekhyun became so busy with the release of his album back in May, that you rarely got to see him afterwards, although he made sure to see you a couple of times per week even if he was on the verge of falling asleep. Besides meeting, you were always chatting on the phone, him updating you about his daily schedules while you would mostly talk and send pictures about the same old stuff - your office, your computer screen or your late lunch. Or a selfie. You were on that basis now, despite a first kiss never happening.

It made you think sometimes if you were the one who was supposed to make the first move. If you grew eager to finally feel him in that way, then he must have also had some similar feelings, right? You had been dying to kiss him since the first time he said he liked you. And it was late June now.

Late June meant that the music awards show was happening just this particular night. Baekhyun had been texting you eager messages to double-check that you would really be attending like you told him you would.

While you quickly looked yourself over in the mirror in your office - you worked even today, a Saturday - you checked your phone's screen, seeing the previews of his messages.

Waiter: finally our schedules overlap ❤️ Waiter: i cant actually believe it  Waiter: huhuhuhu missy are you done with preparing? im curious to see.... Waiter: its just that it would be difficult to do so without it…

Hastily checking your earrings, you read the previews with a large smile. It would be an exciting night.

When you arrived at the event along with your colleagues, you couldn't help feeling clammy from the excitement. The possibility of spotting Baekhyun was making you sick with anticipation. It wasn't even the amount of people attending the event, it was just him; just the idea that he was somewhere there and hopefully he was looking for you just like you were looking for him.

Your colleagues hurried to sit down as the ceremony was about to start. Since you were busy in the office, you ended up leaving the headquarters much later than planned, but there was nothing you could do about it anymore.

The lights dimmed just when you made yourself comfortable, making it too difficult to look around and recognize faces. Deciding to quickly check the messages you didn't have time to look at before, you finally saw what Baekhyun was bombarding you so much about.

Waiter: finally our schedules overlap Waiter: i cant actually believe it Waiter: huhuhuhu missy are you done with preparing? im curious to see how you look so you could send me a selfie and so then i can recognize you at the event hm? without having to stare everywhere and become suspicious Waiter: its just that it would be difficult to do so without it sooooo ????? Waiter: yah!! where did you go?? Waiter: ex...excuse me? ehm ehm!!! Waiter: wow okay… Waiter: Y/N … disappeared... Waiter: i guess you are busy >< im arriving at the venue soon update me so i know where you attttttt okiiii??? ㅎㅅㅎ

You hid your smile behind your hand and quickly typed him a message to update him like he demanded. You couldn't send a selfie anymore because of the silly lights and your superiors being at the same table, you couldn't afford to be on your phone all the time. Hyeri, as much as she was kind, didn't like it when the job was not done properly, so you made sure to pay attention to the performances while you felt your phone vibrate with messages most probably from Baekhyun.

You bit your lip to keep in the smile, your heart fluttering. How was he able to be this… gorgeous even through messages? How was he able to make your heart beat frantically even when he was not around you? Unknowingly, your desire for him grew by tenfold, the sudden urge to meet him almost overtaking your actions, but one strict stare from Hyeri and you stopped squirming in your chair as you realized you did with a horrified look. Wow. You had to do something about this, and it had to be very soon.

To your big misfortune, you never spotted Baekhyun until it was his turn to overtake the stage. As much as you expected something huge, it was anything but that. No props, just a simple mic stand and then, a Baekhyun in a ready-to-go-for-a-date look, plus four dancers and he was able to fill the huge stage to the brim with his presence. That was it. Simple as that.

You inhaled his entire performance, the loud screamings of crazy fans not enough to pull you out of your reverie that consisted of Byun Baekhyun and Byun Baekhyun only. His movements, so sharp yet so smooth, his flirting with the camera, his lip bites, and that crazy happy smile; all of it. He was changing images from lethal sexy, through lazily suggestive, then sweetly gorgeous until becoming cute and ready to pet on the head. Without anything more to add, he had each flavor of a candy to offer and you had never been this addicted to candies in your life.

...

You met him accidentally when you were leaving the toilets that were meant for the VIPs. Closing the door behind you, you felt its cold surface press to your bare back when Baekyun appeared in front of you, freezing momentarily when he recognized you.

He smiled instantly, happy to finally see you, before he let his eyes wander. Finally, he let you know that he was looking. Oh he was. Your dress was revealing on the back, which he had yet to witness, but the front was completely covered, hugging your chest and waist, telling Baekhyun that there was something to look at for sure. The long, wavy skirt that stopped just above the floor was bunched up in your hand, showing sparkly high-heeled shoes that were the cause of the pain in your ankles.

None of you said a word as you took a note of his fancy suit, the simple stage outfit now gone. It was fully black, but once again you couldn't comprehend how broad his shoulders and chest were despite his shirt that was tucked into his pants being black, too.

“Good performance,” you broke the silence finally, meeting his somewhat eager gaze. “I have to admit, I was swooning with the other girls, too.”

That got Baekhyun's attention. His eyebrow rose in question and he stepped closer but not before making sure there were no prying eyes in the small corridor. His body covered yours from anyone, were you to be disturbed. “Oh, were you, really?”

You nodded, your smile teasing. “Yeah.”

He smiled gently, his gaze running over your features that were touched up with make-up. “I'm glad. If I wanted to impress someone, it was you.”

“You did that a long time ago,” you admitted shyly, averting your eyes so he wouldn't catch you shyness.

You heard him letting out a laugh through his nose. “So cute,” he muttered, stepping even closer. “I have to run back but let me drive you home tonight.”

His words made your head snap up though you weren't that much smaller from him anymore thanks to the heels. His words ignited something inside of you. “You came with your car?”

“I asked my friend to bring it over to the venue,” he said. “I am not going back to my company after this. I finally found you here and-” he sighed softly, shaking his head as he looked at you, “I want to spend some time with you. Alone.”

Your breath hitched in your throat, his look making you all itchy and needy. Without much thinking, you found yourself nodding a tad too eagerly which made Baekhyun smile. “Alright,” you whispered, “text me. But I can't leave before my superiors do.”

“Can I just steal you?”

Giggling, you shook your head and suppressed the need to hold his hand. “I'm afraid no. But I will try my best to get out of it quickly.”

His smile was so gentle as he nodded slowly, closing his eyes for a second before stepping even closer, his fingertips running over your clothed forearm in the most feather-like way. “Okay. I'll be waiting for you,” sweetheart.

…

The car came to a complete stop in front of your small apartment building. Audi had quite the silent engine anyway, but now with it being turned off, you felt like silence had a physical form and was growing in on you, making the tension between you and Baekhyun the more difficult to withstand.

Given his silence, you knew that you should say something, and you also knew what you were supposed to do. It was now or never. “Would you maybe… like to come in?”

He glanced over, checking your expression to see if you were serious. He parted his lips but hesitation stole the words away from him. You chuckled when he opened his mouth again and smiled abashedly. “'I’d love to.”

Oh my god, you thought as the both of you made your way towards your apartment. In panic, you tried to quickly think over what state you left your flat in exactly, but it seemed that your mind was clogged up, unable to come up with anything that could possibly explain what was happening in that very moment. Byun Baekhyun, the superstar, was coming inside your apartment. And he seemed to be rather quiet.

Was he overthinking this? Maybe he would realise this was all a mistake and that you weren't good enough for him. Maybe you did something off-putting today?

As you were typing in the code to your house, you felt his strong presence behind you, his gaze on your naked back, and you swore the tension just grew even more when you let him enter your little safety den first. Surely, it was no luxury like he must have been used to by then, given the many years of singing career, but you could only hope it would be enough.

You had been far too gone for him. If he were to dump you, you might end up hurt and heartbroken. 

Letting the door close behind you, you wanted to follow him only to see him standing just a couple of steps ahead of you, looking into the apartment but not moving further inside. “You can enter, Baekyhun.”

“You look so beautiful tonight,” he said softly out of nowhere, catching you off guard with his honest words. Letting them sink in, you bit your lip, feeling your heartbeat accelerate again. It wasn't possible to get a heart attack, right? 

He was standing in front of you while your back was pressed to the front door you just closed behind you. “Thank you,” you whispered, matching his intimate tone and feeling like you were about to combust. “You look really handsome tonight.” And everyday.

He smiled, which you couldn't see as he still had his back on you. Just then, he turned and with that pleasant expression on his face made those separating two steps towards you until he stood right in front of you, causing you to look up. “Thank you.”

You nodded, feeling the terrible blush creeping up into your cheeks. Actually your entire body was suddenly on a heat wave, feeling the prickles of sweat to form under your dress as he stared at you affectionately. God, you wanted him so much it was really becoming unbearable.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“You just asked one,” you replied mischievously, grinning, just to be rewarded with a wide smile from him as he stepped even closer, your heart clenching painfully. Was it the chemistry that was so painful?

“Cheeky,” he whispered, his breath almost hitting your cheek. You kept his eye contact before you nudged him with a go on.

What, do you want to kiss me on the cheek again? you desperately wanted to ask, to tease him. Or would this finally be it? Would he finally just... kiss you? 

“May I kiss you, sweetheart. On the lips.” His intonation was far from that of a question. He was so hot, goodness. And your knees were suddenly jelly-like as you couldn’t stop staring into his eyes when you nodded.

He let out a breathy laugh when he almost pressed his body into yours. Almost. “You don’t like to confirm things out loud with me, do you, beauty?”

“Yes, you may kiss me, Baekhyun. Please, just finally kiss me.”

It was almost as if he wouldn't wait for your approval anyway, as he was leaning in before your words even left your mouth, his hands coming to gently rest against the door; caging you in, yet making you feel even more safe. He was carefully watching your features as he pressed his lips to yours, one hand coming to cradle your face gently before he finally captured your upper lip and you melted. 

Closing your eyes, you sighed as you let your hands slide up his toned chest and around his neck when he pressed himself into you just a little bit closer, a very much satisfied hum coming out of his throat that sent shock waves down your body. That deadly hum. It could really do anything to you, it was that attractive to you.

You dared to run your fingers through his hair that had gel in it, but still felt so cutely soft under your touch. You played with his pillows, prolonging the gentle sucking as you dragged his lower lip towards you, feeling the wetness of his mouth. He leaned in as you separated for the slightest of moments, tilting his head to the other side, unconsciously making one step closer so you felt him on your chest and the surface of the door on your back.

Smooch after smooch, you soon realized he was a loud kisser that liked the licking sounds and the responses from you as you breathed out softly while his thumb caressed your blushed cheek.

Another loud smooch, and this time he was the one who dragged your lower lip towards him with his teeth, as he bumped his nose with yours, tilting his head to the opposite side again while both of his hands cradled your face with utmost care.

Eventually, he kissed you one last time, ending it with him pressing his forehead to yours, not opening his eyes just yet. You didn’t either, relishing in the lingering feeling of him around your mouth as his warm pants pushed in through your parted lips. Slowly, he nuzzled your nose and you giggled softly which prompted him to open his eyes to meet yours already on him.

“That was better than I could ever imagine,” he whispered and smiled handsomely.

You blushed even more, if that was possible. “Ditto.”

His eyes widened and he leaned away a bit. “Don’t tell me you fantasized about kissing me?”

You shrugged but didn’t meet his eye. “How could I not? I’m a human, aren’t I? And you know I like to be straightforward.”

He smirked, knowingly nodding to himself. “Oh yeah, right. The straightforward business.”

You chuckled. “You’re too good of a kisser.”

“Only the best for you,” he winked and those words made you feel things. Before you could reply, he blurted: “Can I be your boyfriend?”

Smiling widely, you nodded, feeling absolutely elated. This was really happening. “Yes, you can be my boyfriend, Baekhyun.”

He sweeped you in his arms, bringing you in for another kiss. “That means,” he murmured between the kisses, “that I can kiss you just like that. And I can finally call you sweetheart,” he breathed the nickname before opening his mouth and devouring you, showing how passionate of a kisser he could be.

You never doubted him, of course, but in situations like these, reality was always better than your poor imagination, for your brain could never produce the exceptional feeling of having Byun Baekhyun’s lips on yours, feeling the moisture and his playful tongue, his creativity of teasing you with it astonishing. No. Nothing could ever compare.

There was only one Byun Baekhyun and he was a superstar. Off-limits to almost everyone. But not to you. Not anymore.

--- --- --- --- ---

A/N: And that is the end! This is the final part, so with this, I am also saying goodbye to this story that made my heart flutter a wee bit... ^^ Thank you to whomever sent me support via comments/reblogs, dms, I was glad this story could bring something enjoyable to the table! ❤   

--- As you know, these 3 chapters were supposed to be about how our characters met and became a couple. So I hope I delivered well! I know I put the M sign in the beginning way back in May, but while plotting, I realized it wasnt suitable for these 3 parts. It would take me more chapters to write to bring it to that point (hint: if you request it as a standalone oneshot later, I am willing to write it but otherwise it would need more relationship building). 

I hope this explains it! 

Thank you again!

Please let me know what you thought, it would mean a lot and its free!

CuriousCat Ask box is also open! Or comments!💕

[petewentzisblack1312]

okay so since you know more than sarah could u give more info?? because i love learning about pete and his blackness as its literally never talked about ANYWHERE else. like thank god for tumblr tbh. sarah is genuinely the only reason ive ever known anything about him in that way but its always been limited so thats why i sent her the ask. i didnt even know ur blog. sorry for sending to her instead of you!!!

oh its fine!! im pretty new on the scene technically. while sarah and i were in the fob fandom at the same time in 2015 ish, i actually left tumblr completely and recently came back!! but anyway, lets talk about petes melanin (my beloved <3)

theres a pretty pervasive narrative, not just around pete but around any black and especially biracial celebrities that theyre ashamed of their blackness or arent "really" black. theres like. a looooooooooong conversation to be had within the black community about this, but to tldr it, the assumption is if you dont look black, you arent black, which for a lot of reasons isnt exactly the case. with him in particular theres a lot of stuff that contributes to this.

most people do not associate the alternative scene and emo especially with black people, so its easy to overlook a lot if someone isnt SUPER obviously black. pete has other ethnic features, like his nose, and is recognizable visually as black except for his skin color. except thats because hes been artificially lightened in photoshoots due to editing and (ALLEGEDLY AND POSSIBLY) lighter foundations. further, he relaxed his hair, which takes away another ethnic feature of his.

there is another aspect to this, which is that black people tan, noticeably and by several shades. you will not notice it if youre like seeing them continuously throughout the year, but as someone who lives in the caribbean and has spent some time in the states, the difference is stark enough to be noticeable. a lightskinned black person may look MUCH paler in the winter compared to in the summer.

in addition, the wealthier you are, the less time you tend to spend in the sun, so ive noticed that black celebrities tend to get lighter as they gain notoriety just because they have like more resources. the reason people from the caribbean tend to become lighter when we go to the states isnt because of less sun, during the summer thats not at all the case, its because the US is more developed so you dont HAVE to spend as much time in the sun.

besides that, hes like genuinely very loud and proud about being black, but all of those attempts are met with backlash. there was the reaction to his natural hair, the reaction to him with cornrows, and the reaction to his very emotional rant about the murder of george floyd. it happens in fobs music too!! ioh for example draws a lot of influence from choral and hymnal arrangements and soul music, not to mention jay-z and babyface working on the album itself, which led to them being labelled sell outs. they also just generally work with rappers more, with lil wayne on tiffany blews and big sean on srar, both of which also led to them being called sell outs. ab/ap as an album draws influence from rap/trap and mixtape culture in the way it was written (thats why its got so many samples), and subsequently got remixed. remember what happened next? mania draws a lot of influence from calypso and dancehall music and features burna boy singing in yoruba patois. that one led to the featured artist getting harassed en masse and multiple (worse) edits of the song without him on it. i dont like it here 💞.

that last point brings me to the fact that while pete definitely loves hardcore and metal, he also has always loved reggae and dancehall. hes half jamaican, spent time in jamaica as a child and listened to his grandparents records, which were. well. reggae and calypso and a little dancehall. if anyone ASKS him about it, hell talk about it willingly and candidly, theres an entire interview from during the hiatus (which i can no longer find rip) where hes asked about and talks about going natural and spending time in jamaica and listening to reggae, which heavily influenced black cards. he visited jamaica during the hiatus! although its unclear if he visited family since literally every news outlet that mentioned it was like "oh tropical getaway <3" unaware that thats where his folks are from

also heres that interview snippet sarah mentioned! i have the full page, its about the early days which is funny bc its just before futct.

theres also some poetry on sarahs blog that she found years ago thats VERY black. i dont like making it easy to find for nonblack people simply because the first time it was unearthed mostly white people were talking about it and the meaning of it went way over everyone elses head so i try to make sure that if people start talking about it they know going in that its about being black and biracial specifically and so that black fans dont feel the way i did when it first surfaced lol

all of this emphatically points to pete genuinely loving his blackness and not trying to hide it and it being something that majorly shaped his life, but genuinely being unable to talk about it bc of public perception.

sorry for talking your ear off!! if you have any specific qs i almost certainly have answers!!

[barsformars]

reaction: to their s/o being understanding of their busy schedule; ateez

req: Hello, can I ask an ateez reaction where the members doesn’t come at home a lot and are kinda busy for sometime, but never heard them complain and greet them happily everytime they meet? Thank you!

Seonghwa

seonghwa had told you right from the start that this would feel like a long distance relationship most of the time due to their neverending schedules (official or unofficial like vlives) and endless comeback preparations. you thought he was exaggerating because both of you are in seoul, how bad could it be? but he wasn’t lying at all. to make up for all the time that he couldn’t spent with you face to face, he always updates you through selfies, pictures, videos and texts. if he has a little more privacy, he would videocall you.

he does put in a lot of effort to still keep in contact with you despite how busy he can be sometimes, and he had already warned you before so he expects you to be understanding to a certain extent. im pretty sure he would still feel really bad so he would probably make it up to you even more by only focusing on you when y'all do get to meet up (which means no texting others or scrolling through social media mindlessly),, would also make every time you meet up a special memory

Hongjoong

you meet him more in his studio than anywhere else for dates to be honest, and most of the time it’s you bringing food or a change of clothes for him. hongjoong knows that no matter how busy one gets, if they really treasure someone they would make time. he knows, so whenever you come over to his studio he would stop working completely and focus on you. he feels really bad that he can’t take you on proper dates often and always apologises no matter how many times you tell him it’s okay.

he makes it up to you by making a whole mixtape/album for you and only you. writes all the songs about you, makes short films of the times you two have spent together and also a lot of late night recordings of him in the studio talking about how apologetic he feels towards you.

Yunho

he really really appreciates that you don’t complain about his busy schedule at all, and also for how you always greet him so cheerfully when y'all get to meet up. he might be the energizer of his group but he really needs you to recharge him too. in the nicest way possible, he doesn’t feel bad about his busy schedule very much actually because he kinda expects his partner to understand that.

however, he does ask you all the time if you’re really fine, and to let him know whenever you’re not happy because he knows what it’s like to always have to put up a happy front. he wants you to be honest with him, and in turn he makes it up to you by being honest about his feelings with you too. this makes your relationship a lot stronger, and also helps both of you be more independent as well, which is always important.

Yeosang

he would feel really sorry about it but also not really because he can’t really help it anyways. he’s really grateful for how understanding you are, and that makes him love and cherish you even more. everytime you greet him with such a big smile, he wonders if he even deserves you.

i see him trying to make it up to you by sending you funny posts or just posts in general that reminds him of you. would also always text you whenever he’s reminded of the little inside jokes that y'all share. he would try to call you as much as possible, but instead of him doing the talking, he just wants to listen to you and how your day went.

San

more grateful than guilty, and it’s not that he takes your understanding for granted, it’s just that he wants to do his best for his fans and himself so he’s always finding himself staying at the company till very late at night. in a way he also wants to do you proud, sort of like “look babe, I was working so hard so that I can achieve this and I dedicate the award to you”

similar to yunho, he would always ask you to not keep it to yourself if you were upset with him not making much time for you. he tries to make time for you, he does, but he knows deep down it’s not enough. but no one is perfect and he’s just trying to balance work and love and it’s not easy

Mingi

i feel like Mingi expects his partner to be understanding of it, and also be kinda busy themselves (doesn’t have to be work, just like hobbies or whatever) so he won’t feel bad about his busy schedule, rather he would be grateful that his partner is an independent individual with their own life too you get what I mean? whenever y'all meet, he’s going to be cheerful and energetic too because he’s excited to see you. dates with you are basically recharging time with you and he hopes it’s the same for you.

Wooyoung

not the type to feel bad about it because he wouldn’t get mad at you if you were busy too. he knows everyone has their own life and things they have to do so he also expects his partner to understand that. also, i just feel like the relationship can he quite low maintenance at times. some days he’s like seonghwa, updating you all day long with texts but some days he’s too busy to do even that so all he manages is maybe a good morning call. but I say it’s low maintenance not in a bad way because whenever y'all meet up it’s like y'all have been meeting and keeping close contact every single day.

also i see him kinda making it up to you by making side dishes for you and putting them in your fridge along with sticky notes to remind you to eat or stay happy whenever you’re busy and he’s not.

Jongho

would feel really really really really REALLY bad about it to be honest. he really wants to be the best boyfriend for you but most of the times he’s busy promoting with ateez and never gets to meet you often. hes also not the best in expressing his love and affection for you even though he wish he was because you deserve it all. because of that, he’s also afraid that you would leave him because he didnt have time for you so whenever you greet him with a smile without any complaints, hes so grateful and very apologetic.

would make it up to you by buying you things that remind him of you, or sending flowers or chocolates your way, or even branded clothes because boy is fancy and he has the $$ okay,, its not that hes trying to buy you, hes just trying to show his love for you.

[escapewriter]

part 22 - because of love

LIE AGAIN

pairing : idol!vernon x musician!female reader

word count : 1.3k

warnings : fluff🙂

a/n : i apologize if there are any grammar mistakes. also, im sorry if its bad😞 im not very good writing this way.

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vernon inhaled and exhaled slowly to calm down his beating heart. he knew she was out there, he knew she wasn’t expecting a lot, he knew that she would this he’s crazy for doing this stupid thing, and yet, his racing heart continued to beat into overdrive.

“you ready man?” wonwoo sat beside vernon, dressed and inears all set, “ready as ill ever be.” the two made their way to backstage by the sound equipment where the rest of the boys were. bringing all their hands together, connecting their thumbs, all of their heads turned to seungcheol, expecting a speech of encouragement. “okay, first show of the tour. lets start this off right,” he brought his voice lower so only the huddled group can hear him and not the staff scurrying around them, “wonwoo, vernon, we got your back, no matter what you do, make it up to them,” they looked at each other and smiled, returning their attention back to their leader, nodding their heads. “well then, lets make this memory last a lifetime, lets have each others backs and make carats proud,” seungcheol paused, taking a breathe, “say the name!” “seventeen!” the group unfolded, patting each others backs in hopes of easing the nerves for one another.

“okay! okay! 30 seconds! everyone to your places!”

~

yn and jiyeon sat back in their chair taking a break from all the singing and screaming as a vcr playing on the big screen. yn leaned her head on jiyeon, “they weren’t kidding when they said theyre good,” a laugh erupted from jiyeons chest until it slowly died down. “yn?” her friend hummed, hearing her call her name, “they haven’t been to our side at all, they probably dont know we’re here.” yn lifted her head off her friends shoulder, “oh well, maybe its for the best. the concerts coming close to an end anyway, you wanna leave early so we can avoid traffic? plus im not feeling very well.” jiyeon had a debate in her head and looked at yn, “we can always watch very nice on youtube, lets go.”

~

dino ran down the hallway, speeding towards the dressing room where the rest of his brothers were. he barged in, slouching over with one hand on the doorknob and one on his knee. the boys looked over towards their youngest, worry and confusion written in their eyes. seungcheol walked up to dino and softly gripped his shoulders, pushing him to stand up straight, “what’s wrong?” dino attempted to talk with his heavy breathing, “yn-, jiyeon-, ah, th-they uh, um they, oh my god i cant breathe can i have WATER?”

they brought him to the couch, refreshing him with a bottle of water. after a couple of gulps, he set the water down, “i just saw jiyeon and yn leave their seats.” the boy looked up at his older brothers, mainly in search of the two who wanted them here the most. wonwoo was slouched in the seat, looking down on his lap, vernon was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. seeing the distraught looks on their faces, mingyu immediately went to his phone, texting the two to stay a little longer.

~

“how the hell did they see us leave??” yn laughed a at jiyeon, who was holding her arm, “i guess they knew us so well. maybe we should just wait by the merch area and sit down so we dont have to walk all the way back.” jiyeon nodded her head and they made their way over to a bench and sat down. “how’s your stomach feeling?” yn had her hand over her tummy, softly rubbing it to sooth the pain, “could be better, maybe very nice being played a couple hundred times would make me feel better.”

the crowd began to scream as they heard the booming voice of dk. “MY CARATS, how are you doing tonight so far?” the fans screamed in response as all 13 of the boys smiled out into the crowd. seungcheol then spoke, causing more screams to erupt from the chests of thousands of girls. “well before we hit our final song of the night, theres a special announcement we have to make,” his voice faded as jiyeon and yn were left curious. “jiyeon, lets stand over there so we can try to see what it is.”

the two girls made their way to the curtain where it opens to the big arena. all 13 boys stood in a line while vernon and wonwoo stood in the middle of all of them while their bothers looked at them. the two stepped forward, carats screaming to get their attention. they waved for a bit and finally, vernon spoke, “hi guys, so wonwoo and i have something to confess.” the girls eyes were wide, fear for their soulmates running through their veins, “wonwoo and i found our soulmates. however, in fear of our company forces us apart, we thought we made the right decision by letting them go,” wonwoo stepped closer to vernon, continuing the speech, “obviously, it was a terrible idea because we’re dying inside. we thought it was for the best for us and for them, but nothing can break apart the power of ones soulmate connection.” they took a breath, the rest of their members coming up behind them to support them. vernon brought the mic up to his lips, “theyre here at the concert, or, they were here. she probably didnt know but i saw her, and i really hopes she knows that i saw her, and she looks beautiful,” aww’s broke out in the arena, echoing off the walls, bringing wide smiles onto vernon and wonwoo’s faces, as well as jiyeon’s and yn’s.

wonwoo took a deep breath, mentally preparing himself, “our company, pledis entertainment is one of the only companies who is against the soulmate system. they threaten their idols who find their soulmate, that if they dont break up with their soulmate, then they get kicked out of the company,” he turned to look at vernon, unable to continue and silently asking the younger to help, “the thought of that kinda scared us, which led us to do some impulsive things, but we’re risking it right now because of love.” “man that was cheesy,” laughter erupted at seungkwan’s comment and vernon rolled his eyes.

“anyway, you all know one of our songs on this album called lie again, right?” jiyeon looked at yn, eyes wide as she started jumping excitedly, “dude thats your song.” right on cue, vernon spoke, “that song, i didnt write it, and woozi didn’t either. its really special to me because my soulmate was the one who wrote it. it’s very beautiful and conveys a feeling in which i have felt the whole time i was away from her, so without any more delays, here’s lie again, dedicated to both,” he turned to wonwoo, “jiyeon,” “and yn.” the boys got into their positions as lie again began to play.

the two girls stood there hugging each other in awe, with love and warmth in their hearts. “you know, the song you wrote was perfect for them.” yn nodded her head at jiyeons comment. “you trust wonwoo?” “you trust vernon?” the two stared each other down and laughed, returning their attention back to the performance. they both had conflicted feelings about what happened, because they didnt want to be the cause of vernon or wonwoo doing something that they regret later. however the thought slipped out of their minds after finally making eye contact with their soulmates.

“damn jiyeon, we really are living the harry styles fan fiction right now.”

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[awsugar]

Someone sent you an anon like two days ago I think asking you why you were so sure franks in love with g and u said you were going to answer it later......... the people want to know........ 👉👈👉👈

hmmmm ok. where to even begin. this is already getting so long so i’m putting it under a cut. you asked for it!!! sorry!

in this interview (its the first question) frank talks about the beginning of the band and the beginning of his relationship with jamia. disclaimer by the way: this is the only like. instance that i’ll discuss her. and it’s not even her it’s my perception of their relationship. she doesn’t want to be in the spotlight and he doesn’t want her to be either, i respect that. but it inevitably comes up with the frerard stuff, “well he was with jamia” so i have to address it to answer this fully. he says that he was sure that he loved her from the beginning but being on tour and stuff your paths don’t always fit together perfectly, and they shift and that sometimes you have to experience life before you can be together. i’m paraphrasing. basically i interpret this as meaning they were in some kind of open relationship and that frank was in a position to potentially develop feelings for someone else as well. this is all talked about in the context of the song all i want is nothing which has the line “wasted time with a crooked spine when i really should have spent my time with you”. so like. we KNOW that there was someone else and that it coincided with the band being on tour. the logical explanation to me is that it would have been someone he was on tour with. you can’t really have a side chick while you’re on tour unless she’s on tour with you lol. so right off the bat gerard is a possibility to me. but mainly this interview says to me that they were open or seeing other people.

this is a screenshot from the FT Willz myspace:

he lists himself as a swinger. the basic definition of swinging is just swapping sex partners but it adds to the non-monogamous theory.

something that definitely proves to me that they had something going on is the kiss on conan. i don’t take any of the “stage gay” as proof of their “relationship” for lack of a better word. it was really performative for the most part, i’ll fully admit that. but this one is different. it’s not during a song it’s not the heat of the moment (as they’ve cited as a reason for it in the past) they’re not doing it for an audience, conan had literally just cut to commercial, no one was supposed to see it and frank just turns around and grabs gerard’s face and kisses him. it’s an action that reeks of comfort and familiarity. there’s no way that was their first kiss. so like. stuff like that was going on behind the scenes clearly.

i know i said i don’t care about stage gay but frank’s reaction to some of it is telling to me. we’ve been over it a millions times but The Kiss™(1:44). the way frank reacts to it drives me so crazy. the way he drops his guitar to wrap his arms around him like he can’t help himself. it’s just definitely the actions of someone who has feelings to me.

another thing for me is just. the way frank looks at him and talks about him. i’m not going to link sources on that cause i think everyone knows what i mean. frank thinks gerard is the funniest, most brilliant, talented person he’s ever met it’s so CLEAR. it speaks volumes.

i think i may need to go into my theories on what went down. thankfully i answered this on my other blog in the past. this ask is mainly about my thoughts on the fight but i go into a bunch of stuff on what i thought was going down. after projekt rev is when i think everything stopped, whatever it was that was going on. another ask on what i think happened.

so that’s all nice and good but a big part of why i’m sure frank was in love with him is solo lyrics. 

i’m not going to do a full millions breakdown here because i have in the past. if you’re actually curious about all this i suggest reading that post because it just says so much in one song, whereas frank’s lyrics about the situation are really spread out over different songs. gerard has said the song is about the end of the band but there’s also a lot of lyrics in their that are about an unrequited relationship. “you don’t understand we don’t hold hands” sounds SO directed at frank, who was in love with gerard and thought he could have both jamia and gerard and gerard was just like...no.

a big part of it to me is that it seems like they’re writing their two sides of the same story. gerard says “you don’t understand we don’t hold hands” “i think you’re sore i think i’m done” the william it was really nothing reference. frank says “someone i love threw me away” (also related to the end of the band, frank took it extremely hard and the fact that he was in love with gerard probably made it worse, made it feel like gerard was doing away with him, he probably took it extremely personally) “i’m not what you wanted”. there are a lot of other lyrics i think are about gerard but those specifically seem like different sides of the same coin, the juxtaposition between frank and gerards lyrics on both of their first solo albums.

i don’t know if i’ve done a good job at explaining my viewpoint here. i think part of it is that i’ve been around for so long and i’ve watched it all go down and i’ve come to my conclusions. the solo lyrics (of which there are MANY more) solidified it all for me. there’s no denying that frank was in love with someone other than jamia with whom it didnt work out. i think it was gerard based on the other sutff i’ve said here.

[anythingandeverything1d]

Plum Sized

Part 1: Congratulations Part 2: Im having your baby

The next few weeks had gone by in a blur. Harry had left again to do some more writing, promising he would be back for your next ultrasound and doctors appointment. Luke was still getting over the fact that you had just let Harry back into your life like that, but since Harry hadn't really been around much he was warming back up to the idea a little bit more and had started coming over more, specifically in the mornings which had been really hard for you. You had woken up every morning with extreme morning sickness. You couldn't eat for hours, you felt dizzy and threw up multiple times. Certain smells and foods just made you want to vomit at the thought. 

You were laying in bed trying to avoid throwing up when Luke walked in with a smile. “Morning beautiful, figured you might still be sick and in bed so I brought you a smoothie. Shouldn't have any weird smells or anything so I thought it might be worth a shot.” He handed you a large smoothie and sat on the edge of the bed. “How are you doing?”

You took the smoothie and thanked him before taking a small sip. It actually tasted amazing and nothing about it so far had made you sick so that was a big plus. “Not too bad....still just so nauseous. I mean the sight of food, the idea of food, it all just makes my stomach turn. I’m also just getting nervous about the appointment. I have to have my blood drawn and then we will probably find out the gender from that and of course it’s Harry’s first time going to an appointment so thats extra pressure because well because its Harry.” you sighed taking another sip and sitting up.

Luke nodded. “Have you heard much from him recently?”

“No...he’s been busy writing I think.” You bit your lip. Truth is after Harry had spent the night, he had waken up and left. You had hoped there might be something left to reconcile but he was really only interested in the baby. He had left the following afternoon even though you had asked him to stay. All you wanted was for him to actually step up, to be there for you the way he said he wanted to be. “He should be coming here tonight so that he doesn't miss the appointment..”

“Well I hope for your sake he does.”

“I’m sure he will but anyways lets talk about something else. What have you been up to? What’s new in your life?”

“Uh not a lot...I do have a date tomorrow though.”

“A DATE?!”

Luke laughed and grinned, “Yeah I met this girl, her name is Kayla and well we really hit it off so I’m taking her out tomorrow for a fun picnic lunch date. I think it’ll be a lot of fun.”

“Im sure it will be, you plan the best dates. So where did the two of you meet?” you played with the styrofoam cup your smoothie was in distractedly as went on about meeting Kayla at a gas station. You wished Harry would plan cute dates, and care more about everything. You wished he would text you good morning and good night or check in throughout the day. You wanted more from a relationship but at the same time...you really only wanted Harry. It was a hard place to be in at the moment. Just thinking about it and how frustrated you were with him made you tear up. You wiped a tear and noticed Luke was looking at you weirdly. “Sorry what?”

“I asked if you were okay....you seem. I don't know...not okay?”

You laughed and wiped another tear away. “Yeah, I’m fine just been thinking.”

He nodded unsure but was willing to let it go for your sake. “Well I have to go get ready for work, but enjoy the smoothie and text me later to let me know you are okay and all good. Promise?”

“Promise. Thank you for the smoothie..You really are the best friend a girl could have.”

“I try” he squeezed your hand and then walked out, leaving you to your thoughts.

After a few hours of lounging around you decided to get up and be productive. You threw on a pair of leggings and a t-shirt and froze when you looked in the mirror. Your stomach had definitely grown, and a small baby bump was definitely visible. You light touched your stomach and smiled. It was all startling to feel real. You got to work, cleaning almost every room of your house and by the end everything was spotless and beautiful. You felt good. There was just something about a clean house that cleared your mind. It was almost 4:00 pm by the time everything was finished and you still hadn't heard from Harry. He was supposed to come home tonight so that he could take you to your appointment in the morning. *Hey, how's writing going? Think youre going to make it home for the appointment tomorrow?* you texted him. You sat waiting for a reply but when it didnt immediately come you decided to start on dinner. Tonight you were going to be making spaghetti with meatballs and garlic bread, nothing too fancy but still delicious. You were boiling the water and buttering bread when your phone buzzed. Harry’s face was on the screen so you quickly answered it. “Hey!” you said cheerfully.

“Hey love, look I’m in the middle of a song right now and I don't want to stop so I don't think I’m going to make it tomorrow.”

Your heart sank and tears threatened to spill from your eyes. “But Harry this is a really important appointment. This is where we-”

“I know, I’m sorry. I’ll be at the next one I swear.”

You didn’t even answer, just hung up the phone and went back to cooking. The whole night was spent thinking about Harry. How couldn't he want to be there? Why was writing more important than his family? Did he even care at all? You were frustrated, upset, hurt, and confused. None of it made sense. Harry always said that he wanted kids and he wanted to be the dad that was there at every moment. Yet here he was not even caring to show up and you were done with it. *Good luck writing. Don't bother in calling me anymore I think our baby will be better off without you in its life* you know it was a long shot, something meant to dig at him but you didnt care. You were done with letting Harry hurt you again. You were sitting on the floor crying when Luke walked in carrying two suits. 

“Hey which should I wear- Are you okay?” he immediately knelt down, dropping the suits and rubbing your shoulders. “(y/n) are you okay?” You shook your head no. Luke got more worried. He tried scooping you into his arms. “Are you hurt? What happened?”

“No.” you wiped your face and let out a shaky breath. “I think I just broke up with Harry again.”

Luke froze trying to decide what to say. He decided to play it safe, “I’m sorry.” 

“It’s okay. It’s not your fault, its not mine, its his. He just doesn't care.”

“He will one day, it just sucks he doesn't realize it now.” you nodded leaning into him. “So youre going alone tomorrow?”

You nodded again. “I’ll be okay.”

He sighed, “no. You shouldn't go through all of this alone. I’ll go. I’ll take you.”

“But your date..”

“I’ll reschedule. I have a friend in need.” You smiled and wiped your tears. 

“Can I still pick out the outfit you wear?” Luke laughed and nodded standing up and then pulling you to your feet.

“Of course.” He looked at you and gave you a look.

“What?”

“Your belly...its like actually bigger.”

“Well I do have a baby inside me that grows everyday.” You laughed. “Today, at 12 weeks, the baby is the size of a plum.”

“A plum? How do you know that?”

“I have an app that tells me its size according to fruits every week.”

He laughed and rolled his eyes, “A plum. Who would've guessed.”

You laughed instantly feeling better. You held up the two suits and smiled. “The grey one. It brings out your eyes.” You smiled and handed it to him.

“That was a quick decision.”

“I’ve been your friend for forever. I know what you look good in.”

The rest of the night was spent lounging around. Luke had gone home, promising to pick you up for your appointment and you still hadn't gotten a response from Harry. You weren't really expecting one, but you had hoped he would say something. You decided turning in early was a good idea so you threw on Harry’s old t-shirt, the one you slept in every night and jumped into bed. You were exhausted so falling asleep was easy. You had awoken to the sound of the door opening. You laid in bed listening for other sounds but didnt hear anything. You covered your head with the blanket and tried thinking to if you had imagined it or not. Then you heard footsteps walking up the stairs. You panicked. You didnt know what to do. You grabbed your phone and looked for something you could attack an intruder with. The footsteps were getting closer and your heart was racing. The door opened and you were ready to dial 911. “(y/n)?” Harry’s voice whispered. You breathed out and turned on a light next to the bed.

“Harry what the hell!” you screamed. “I thought you were a robber or murderer or something. You cant do that!”

Harry walked in and smiled holding out a giant bouquet of flowers. “I’m sorry...I didnt mean to scare you but I also didnt want to wake you if you were sleeping.”

“What are you doing here.” 

He sighed and walked to the bed sitting down next to you on the edge. “I came to apologize. I haven't been a good dad lately. I haven't even been good to you. I got so distracted trying to please the fans with this next album that I was forgetting what's more important. My family. I know I don't deserve forgiveness. I know I promised you I would be here and be present and then I wasnt but this time I will be. I want to be there for you. I want to be there for this little one.” He touched your belly and smiled. “Im done writing for now. At least leaving to write. I want to be here, with you, as much as possible. I want us to work on whatever this is and to experience all the baby stuff together.”

“Harry-”

“Please (y/n)....give me one more chance...I promise not to screw it up.” He placed his head down by your stomach and your fingers immediately went to his hair. You sighed and he looked up.

“Fine. One more chance but if you screw this up Harry you won't be in my life or the baby’s.”

“Trust me love, I won't screw it up again.” He kissed your forehead and set the flowers on the nightstand. He then stripped down to his boxers and climbed into bed. He pulled you against his chest and trailed fingers down your belly. “Did you know that the baby is the size of a plum today. Like an actual plum, isn't that crazy?” 

You laughed and turned towards him. You touched your nose to his and smiled. He kissed you softly and smiled back. “I’m glad youre here Haz” you snuggled into him and he held on tightly.

“Me too.” He rubbed your back until you fell asleep and part of you expected him to be gone when you woke up. Just a dream. An imagination. But when your alarm went off and your eyes opened, you were snuggled against his chest, his body gently snoring like the angel he was. You rolled over and snoozed the alarm before returning to him. You traced his butterfly tattoo until he cracked his eyes open with a smile. “Morning.” he whispered deeply.

“Morning.” you smiled before climbing out of bed. 

“Where are you going” he groaned sitting up in the white comforter. “Im exhausted...cant we stay in bed a little longer.”

You walked over to his side, knelt down and kissed his nose. “We have an appointment so get up and get ready.” You smiled and stretched. Harry jumped out of bed and froze watching you. “Whats wrong?”

“Your belly...I can actually see the plum size. That is so cool.” “Wait until you see the baby at the appointment.” you smiled walking into his embrace. “We should be able to see actual features today. It won't be just a blob anymore.”

You were getting ready and so was Harry, except he was pretty much done. He was in his black skinny jeans, a tshirt and a sweater vest. “Do I look like a dad?”

You laughed and nodded. “You look like a hot dad though.” He grinned and kissed you about to respond when the doorbell rang. “Can you get that, its probably Luke.”

“Luke?” 

“Yeah he's coming today too.”

“Great...” Harry mumbled walking downstairs to answer the door. You finished throwing your hair in a pony tail and picked one of Harry’s smaller shirts, the one with his album title along a heart with his name, before running downstairs. Luke and Harry were just staring, no glaring at each other. 

“Hey” you smiled hugging Luke. “Ready to go?” Harry and Luke nodded and you followed them outside. 

“Whats the deal?” Luke harshly whispered, grabbing your arm and pulling you back. 

“What?” you played innocently.

“Why is he here?”

“He’s the dad Luke..”

“Yeah but I thought you were done with him.”

“I was...but I feel like I owe it to the baby to give him another chance. He showed up last night and promised to be here. I’m not just going to say no Luke.”

Luke rolled his eyes and you pulled your arm from his grip to catch up to Harry. He smiled and grabbed your hand. “Ready to see our little baby love?”

You nodded and climbed into the car. Harry decided he wanted to drive so Luke jumped in the backseat. The car ride there was silent, no one really talking but when we got to the waiting room you told Harry to check you in so you could run to the bathroom. The nurse was waiting with the two guys and you followed her in. She retook your weight, stating that you had gained a little which was normal. She then took all three of you into a room where you changed into a gown and waited. Harry was anxiously pacing the room and Luke was just glaring at Harry when the doctor walked in. “(y/n) so nice to see you again, are you ready to see the baby?” You nodded as he looked to the two guys. “Who do we have here today?” he asked. Harry stepped forward and extended his hand. 

“I’m Harry, its a pleasure to meet you.” he smiled and gave you a reassuring wink. 

“Harry is the dad.” you added looking at the doctor. He nodded and smiled.

“Its nice to meet you Harry. And you?” he looked over at Luke. 

“Oh, I’m Luke. I’m (y/n)’s friend.” 

“Nice to meet you too. Alright lets see what we got here. He turned the lights lower and squirted the cold gel on your stomach earning a surprised look from Harry which made you laugh. “Have you been having any symptoms?”

“Yeah I’ve had morning sickness quite a bit lately.”

“Ah, thats a normal but unfortunate one.” He was scrolling around your stomach looking for the baby. “Has it been manageable?”

“Yeah its not been too terrible, I’m still feeling good most of the day.”

“Good thats what we want. Ah here it is...” Harry grabbed your hand and smiled looking at the screen. “So you can see here is the head, the butt, an arm, a leg, everything seems to be there. Let’s see if we cant get the heartbeat.” Luke looked a little sick but smiled when you looked at him and Harry was in awe. 

“I think she looks like you..”

“How do you know its a she?” you asked surprised.

“I just feel like its going to be.”

“I feel like its going to be a boy, and I think he looks like you.” Harry smiled shaking his head. He was about to respond when you heard the familiar thump thump thump of a heartbeat. Harry had tears falling down his cheek. You smiled and wiped them away.

“That’s amazing.” he looked at the doctor with a smile. “Thank you for showing us that.”

The doctor nodded, flipping the light back on and handing you a towel to wipe your stomach. “Okay, you look good the baby looks good but we do want to do a blood test..From this you can find out the gender if you like.”

“Yes.” You said and looked at Harry.

“I think we should wait...let it be a surprise.” Harry said looking at you.

“Harry its not your decision.” Luke intervened.

“Its my baby too. I think we should wait.” He said pointedly at Luke.

“It should be (y/n)s decision. She's the one carrying it.”

“Well I think we both would have fun waiting.” Harry looked at you and you looked down.

“You haven't even been here. You don't have a say in it.”

“Luke,” you cut him off. “It is Harry’s baby too. He's the one here now and thats all that matters. Why don't we wait now and we can always decide later to look.”

Harry smiled and nodded at you, then glared at Luke. Luke just rolled his eyes. “whatever.” The doctor took your blood, explaining that it would also test for some genetic defects and diseases and that you would receive a call in the next few days with the results. You held Harry’s hand the whole time while talking to Luke so luckily you did not faint. Harry helped you to your feet, and held onto you to make sure you weren't going to drop back at any notice. You smiled and gave him a reassuring kiss. He let you go a little but still tightly held your hand. You set up another appointment and then walked out with your guys. Harry opened the car door for you and Luke climbed in the back seat. After ensuring you were buckled the three of you drove home. Luke left without saying a word and Harry rolled his eyes.

“What an asshole.” 

You lightly smacked his arm and smiled. “He will come around. Trust me.”  

Harry’s only response was a kiss on the cheek. “Come on, we need to go by my place and pick up some stuff.”

“What stuff?”

“Like all of it.”

“Why?”

“Well I figured we should probably live together so I can help out with everything..” Your mouth dropped open. “Unless thats not okay...” he added concerned he had overstepped.

“No. No I would love that...I just didnt think thats what you would want.”

“(y/n) I know the last few months have been rocky with us but I want to be here all the time with you. I love you and I want us to make things work. If me being here to help, mends that? I’ll never leave the house again.” He kissed your softly and you smiled. 

“I love you Haz.”

“I love you too love.”

---

Part 3 of the pregnancy series, hope you guys like it :) There wasnt a lot of action in this chapter but just wait for the next ;)

xoxo

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

hehe glad i could make you laugh, oooh that sounds awesome! yeah id love to be tagged it sounds great :)

YES the differences are so fucking weird. like, they do know they're the same age right? i feel like its just an exagguration of how much the persons role in the group matters, like we see chan being held up as such a mature, old leader while jungkook who is literally the same age, is still babied etc. like enha hyung line is basically the same age (if a bit younger) as chenle and jisung but somehow the rules are different?? as you point out, still legal but still bizarre. hehe yeah, i mean where else are we going to rant? quora lol. mmm, hopefully more people can just write less smut abt people who are barely adults

ah, no prob it didnt take long. yeah i think thats right (i keep forgetting you know my url lol) mmhmm :( i think if that happened irl there would be some major trauma going on. knock wood it never happens to you or me lol (/hj)

hehe same! oooh glad Redemption For Cheese was realised! yess we cant rllycomplain that theyve written/produced too much good music lol. yeah, ive dragged him into being a stay so *dusts hands off* mission accomplished. mmm yeah, they tend to have a certain vibe but tbh it couldve worked if they were any other group but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ahh ur one step ahead of me on the stages of listening to ssick i think, still not convinced but thats okay! hehe, it had to be said. yesss the itch in the back of my brain is very satisfied by sorry i love you, felixs vocals deserve to be appreciated! (side note i feel like hes trying to sing more like his speaking voice, sorta husky, but tbh i wouldnt be mad if he sang like in glow, his sweet honey vocals made my life lol. but i think ive heard him say he doesnt like singing like that cos it makes his normal voice less husky, so what can you do)

> YES SOMEONE SAID IT. seungmin rap KING, he sped thru that rap like it was nothing, he deserves more rap lines. i do like how they gave minho some melodic rap lines this comeback, my guy deserved to show off those skills that made him not be eliminated (flashbacks to stay collectively wanting to murder jyp) and we already know changbin can sing, my man murdered masked singer. hyunjin can obviously sing as can jisung and felix, and i want to hear chan rap more! i feel like he started as part of 3racha (as a rap unit not producing) and then just became a vocalist (which im fine with, but it could be nice to hear him flex his rapping skills) and was partially replaced by hyunjin. anywayyy

back to album talk. lmaooo sad music to twerk to PERFECTLY describes silent cry. yes secret secret is and will always be, a masterpiece. hehe glad i could make you laugh :) i just felt like they have similar vibes. putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised. oh my beloved track, red lights. ahh thats okay, we can have different opinions, but by god the lyrics are *chefs kiss*. *banging on table* TWISTED AU TWISTED AU TWISTED AU. yess id love to see ur take on it! sdfghjkl it would have been glorious

no no! not stupid, just able to predict my brainwaves. ooooh thats so cool! makes me want to go there (wherever there is lol) yeah the waves are pretty good here, but none of my familys a surfer, so we dont rlly enjoy the full potential lol. YES moving on to gone away, it is indeed a heartwrenching track, but the vocals and the bloody key change? makes me want to brave being sad just to listen to it. mmm yeah, good point :( i feel like ive just gotten used to overthinking so much so that it doesnt matter what mood im in, ill do it anyway, so might as well just do what i feel like doing anyway.

yeah i think ur right! it is quite comforting knowing that all the tracks will get the love they deserve. i feel like also people assume kpop is just one genre which is utter bs. there are so many different vibes and feels and songs, i couldnt get into kpop (of which i thought only the bright cheerful present day bts stuff existed smh) until i heard gods menu so... idk where i was going with this but yeah. :)

YES FUCK YG, theyre literally on the brink of being kicked out of the big three and they are holding their salvation hostage without letting them do ANYTHING. idek what thought process goes thru their minds but arghhh its so infuriating. yess lisa's cb will be awesome but ot4 is the gold standard here.

hehe, glad u could get to this point. no no! u dont sound like a cult member at all lol yeah, i loooove some of their songs but the whole 23 members thing is getting to me. thats prob a common problem with nctzens but what can i say? im a simple girl with a limit to how many korean boys i can give my money to. atm im just trying to get into ateez and finish memorising enhypen's faces. also kard is kinda sucking me into their fandom atm, as well as eric name lol. ah what can you do? ooh thats good!

hehe i love it too! its exactly like online penpals, that was rlly well put. aww ty! hmm im okay, recovering from a bad case of rsv so thats fun. im doing okay mentally, starting therapy soon (after having to convince my mother that its not just smth i can brush off). physically i wont go into, basically i should be doing stretches to help but they dont completely fix it so my lazy ass doesnt do them, plus i got told recently im going to be stuck with this condition for the rest of my life so thats fun! ah, before you type smth dw abt me ill be fine. the weather atm is cloudy but warm, its been raining on and off today which is good for the garden. uhh i just finished reading sunburnt veils and im in the middle of prom theory which is rlly good. ummm ive got a concert tonight? that i may or may not be able to sing in (bc of the whole rsv thingo) and uhhhh idk. my dog is cute? im drinking tea rn? ive got a school dance coming up?

wbu? hows ur day going, how are you? whats the weather like on ur end? done anything interesting lately? found smth that makes you rlly happy? just any random thing youve been dying to tell someone?

no no! dont apologise, i love these exchanges. i think im happy to continue them for a long time :) on the other hand, if you get tired of them, feel free to just not answer at any time. goodness gracious this was a long ask haha hope it isnt too annoying

<3 w.a. 🐺

sorry it took me a bit to reply, i was fixing my theme ;n;

yeah, i figured it was because of the roles too. my friends and i still get taken aback when 3rd gen idols are the same age as 4th gen ones. in my head it doesn't add up sometimes. PLS THE RANT AT QUORA SKJDK tbh tho it's just going to be normalized as the years pass? esp that the boys are growing older and the amount of explicit fics will just increase. i might have to start blocking tags.

i had to look up the previous ask to remember what we were talking about xd i hope the events in champagne problems never happens to anyone. realistically, it probably happens a lot. damn i really won't wish that pain on anyone. dragging your brother into being a stay i whEEZED JFKSA additional noeasy music enthusiast o.o and ALL I CAN SAY WITH YOU GUSHING ABT FELIX IS AHA WHIPPEEEED OML can't blame you tho, i also want to hear felix sing more in other shades (if that makes sense HAHA) i really hope they'll do the role exchange in the next comeback :( or like in the near future bc i know they can do it :( the day i hear seungmin rapping it i will respectfully pass away. minho was given more lines this comeback thank fUCK i could rmb my irl being vocal abt her frustration. i don't get why minho barely has center time/lines in title tracks??? like the line distribution in the past eras just made me ???? if seventeen can balance lines with 13 members why cant a group of 8 do the same? moving on. i haven't watched the stray kids show simply bc i don't want to cry HAJS but i've seen clips. imagine if skz debuted without minho and felix?!?!? i rmb another irl catching bias feels towards changbin bc of the masked singer only to find out that the man's a rapper. i love how skz's vocals were highlighted this comeback :c there were a lot of mellow tracks! i find it cute when chan sings/raps bc it gets kinda obvious that he's a foreigner? the accent (im not even sure if it's the accent) it just shows. "putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised." CORRECT.

abt the twisted au o.O i'll inquire my irl if she wants to write it or not. if she doesn't want to, i'll do it. i miss writing twisted aus <3___<3 and i also miss going to the beach with my friends :' ) but it's starting to get cold here and i don't think i'll be able to enjoy the beach as much as i would if i went beaching in the summer. so maybe next summer? gone away really has an sm-ballad vibe. the thing about skz being a self-producing group, their songs don't sound like typical jype songs? and i just appreciate that bc in all honesty im not a fan of jyp groups at all. PLS the overthinking. i wish i could mute overthinking.

anyone who assumes kpop is just one genre obv hasn't listened to a single track. if kpop was just one genre why do i like some tracks more than the others??? oh you've only recently become a kpop stan? tbh im not a fan of the bright songs of bts either. i liked their older ones *chefs kiss* really matched high school vibes. yg has good artists and they're just wasting the talent ~.~ that strategy they have will get tiring eventually. people will stop waiting on blackpink and move on to newer more active groups ://

HAHAHAH yeah the 23 members is pretty overwhelming! it was the reason i didn't bother stanning before quarantine started. i don't regret stanning tho, met my ult bias in that group <3___<3 i don't really purchase albums unless i like the tracks xd ohhh getting into ateez just in time for the comeback! let me know what you think about them! i was fond of them at some point but grew out of it. good luck with memorizing enhypen! it took me a while to distinguish to people there XD i haven't checked out kard yet but chan plays their songs during lives and they're sexc hype music me likey *u*

i had to look up rsv im sorry. i'm glad you're recovering! please rest more and don't stress yourself out. bro i wish i could go to therapy too bc i have weird issues i can't justify and i need a professional to tell me what's the reason behind it. stuck with what condition btw? what happened? i'm sorry in case i just forgot. yesterday was a bit rainy for me too :(( it's not the type of rainy that makes me anxious so B) oh concert! good luck and i hope you'll be able to sing but i also don't think it's best for you rn :c what's your dog's breed? and yes i just finished drinking tea too. AAAAA i miss school dances :(( the last one i was supposed to have was cancelled bc of covid.

i was less productive today and i'm teetering between being mentally stable and becoming a hermit again. i'm anxious with a lot of things atm so like : D not the best state. today it was a bit sunny but not hot hot which was nice. i changed my theme today bc i couldn't wait for sept. 1st. and no i haven't found anything that makes me happy HAHAHA shit like that's hard to identify. don't have anything to say too, i'm just thinking about why i'm procrastinating too much atm T_T and i'm listening to this rap song atm and one of the rappers sounded like han.

it isn't annoying! i enjoy the long exchanges but i do admit it takes me awhile to type down a reply. so if i get more busy, it'll prolly take a bit longer for me to reply.