#also the power went out while i was typing th | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

immortalarizona · 2 months

Text

Died With a Hammer in His Hand: Unpacking the Myth of John Henry

“John Henry said to his captain: ‘You are nothing but a common man, Before that steam drill shall beat me down, I’ll die with my hammer in my hand.’” — “John Henry, the Steel Driving Man,” recounted by W. T. Blankenship

John Henry is one of America’s most well-known mythic heroes, immortalized in song, statue, postage stamp, and multiple movies (including a 2000 Disney animated short film which I vividly remember watching in elementary school). But if you’re unfamiliar with the legend, here’s a brief summary.

John Henry was a freed slave who found himself working for a railroad company in the years following the Civil War as a steel driver. His job was to drive a steel spike into rock so that dynamite could be placed in the resulting hole, thus opening up a tunnel through the Appalachians.

John Henry was the best on his crew, and he took pride in his work—so when a white salesman brought in a steam-powered drill, claiming that it could drill better than any man, he decided to challenge that claim. Henry entered into a contest with the machine to see who could carve out the deepest hole in the mountain in a single day.

His victory cost him his life.

Henry’s wife—sometimes named Polly Ann, sometimes named Lucy, sometimes not named at all—went to visit him on his deathbed that evening. In many versions of the ballad, Henry’s last words are a request for a glass of water. In other versions, he asks his wife to be true to him when he’s dead, or to do her best to raise their son. Many accounts say that he’s buried by a railroad, where “Every locomotive come roarin’ by, / Says there lays that steel drivin’ man” (lyrics from Onah L. Spencer).

Bronze statue of John Henry near Talcott, West Virginia, sculpted by Charles Cooper.

The general consensus among historians now seems to be that the ballad of John Henry is one such legend that has its roots in historical fact, although the particulars are long obscured by the centuries that have since passed. Henry was born into slavery in the 1840s or 50s, either in North Carolina or Virginia (some accounts of the ballad lend credence to the latter claim). As for how John Henry found himself working for the Chesapeake & Ohio Railway company, University of Georgia history professor Scott Reynolds Nelson posits in his book Steel Drivin’ Man that the man was sentenced to ten years in a Virginia prison for theft at only nineteen years of age, and that he was among many prisoners leased out by the state for labor.

Did you know that the 13th Amendment makes an exception for slavery which is used “as a punishment for crime whereof the party shall have been duly convicted”? (This practice continues to this day, and has become an industry worth tens of billions of dollars. Louisiana State Penitentiary, also known as Angola or simply “The Farm,” is a good place to begin if you’re wanting to look into chain gangs further.) John Henry the legend was a free worker who took on the backbreaking, often dangerous work of railroad labor under his own power and could demand any wage for his work, but John Henry the man may have lived and died in neoslavery.

Speaking of Henry’s death, most retellings of the myth say that he died of sheer exhaustion. Some add in the detail that it was his heart that gave out because he worked himself too hard. However, alternate theories have been proposed for how the man died. Some historians say it was a stroke that killed him, while others posit silicosis.

It’s this latter hypothesis which I find most intriguing. For those who aren’t familiar with it, the American Lung Association describes silicosis as “a lung disease caused by breathing in tiny bits of silica, a common mineral found in sand, quartz and many other types of rock.” It’s been an occupational hazard for construction workers since, well, the time of John Henry. What I find interesting are the implications for the narrative if the real Henry died of silicosis. In the folk ballad, Henry causes his own death by working himself too hard. On the other hand, the ones at fault if the man died of silicosis would be his employers—the ones responsible for the dangerous conditions he worked in.

So why would John Henry’s cause of death change during the transition from fact to legend?

The answer, as with many other fictionalized accounts of historical events, is that it simply makes for a more effective story. But not just that—a more effective message. So what might the ballad be trying to tell those who listen to it?

First, let’s think about who this song was sung by and for. The ballad of John Henry is a work song, its rhythm meant to help railroad workers stay and strike in sync, in the same way a drumbeat helps soldiers march in step. It’s been sung by railroad workers, miners, construction workers, chain gangs, and country musicians. At its core, then, the ballad is a song of and for the American working class—specifically those people doing the same sort of backbreaking physical labor as John Henry himself. Many of these laborers would have been Black, and likely former slaves—especially when it came to Southern chain gangs. (See my above note about how American slavery was only mostly abolished, and then think about why the U.S. has one of the highest incarceration rates in the world. . . but I digress.)

An oil painting of John Henry by Frederick Brown.

We’ve established that John Henry is a hero for working-class Americans during the time of the Second Industrial Revolution. But what sort of hero is he? Is he like Achilles, a paragon of his country’s values and an example for the audience to aspire to? Or is he an Icarus, a cautionary tale sung so the audience won’t repeat his mistakes?

The answer depends on who’s telling the story.

Onah L. Spencer is the source for one version which emerged from a Black community in Cincinnati, Ohio. When he recounted the lyrics to Guy B. Johnson for the latter’s 1929 book John Henry: Tracking Down a Negro Legend, he also stated that the song was used to motivate workers: “. . . if there was a slacker in a gang of workers it would stimulate him with its heroic masculine appeal.”

In cases such as Spencer’s crew, then, John Henry’s death is presented as glorious, and Henry is seen as admirable for working so hard that it kills him. Here, he’s a good example. Taken to the extreme, the Achillean Henry encourages fellow workers to follow in his footsteps—to keep pushing themselves harder and harder until they finally keel over.

This message doesn’t benefit the workers passing it along; it benefits the employers profiting from their labor. This, I think, is where the story blurs the line between myth and propaganda. And while the ballad of John Henry certainly isn’t singlehandedly responsible for the American tendency to overwork ourselves, it does reflect our attitudes about work in a way that’s worth unpacking. To me, this reeks of the Puritan work ethic. The belief was that you had to be working as often as you could; if you didn’t, the devil would be able to influence you. The Puritans were one of America’s foundational cultural influences—of course those values would have influenced the ballad of John Henry.

Henry is a hero because he worked himself to death. If we see him as a good example, what does this say about the effects that capitalism has had on American attitudes? About the internalized belief that our worth as humans only comes from what we can contribute to the economy? Why do we see death from exhaustion as a fitting end for a former slave?

Then again, maybe we’re not supposed to.

A lithograph of John Henry, from the series American Folk Heroes, by William Gropper.

Remember how I noted earlier that many of the laborers who first sang Henry’s ballad would themselves have been former slaves? It’s important because there’s a long history of American slaves using work songs as a tool of resistance against their oppressors, and these Black laborers—these “freed” slaves—would have carried that tradition with them into the Second Industrial Revolution.

The ballad of John Henry, then, might have been sung with the intent of helping other workers survive the brutal conditions on the railroads. Here, Henry becomes an Icarus—a warning of what happens if you push yourself too hard. One version of the ballad recorded by Edward Douglas of the Ohio State Penitentiary contains lyrics which suggest that not every Henry was meant to be emulated.

“John Henry started on the right-hand side, And the steam drill started on the left. He said, ‘Before I’d let that steam drill beat me down, I’d hammer my fool self to death, Oh, I’d hammer my fool self to death.’”

Don’t do what John Henry did, this version warns the audience. Be wiser than he was. Don’t push yourself quite so hard. Think of the people you’d be leaving behind if you’re not careful.

Perhaps even the creation of this mythos was an act of defiance in and of itself. At this point, I think it bears mentioning that I myself am not Black and can only hypothesize based on what I’ve heard from people who are, but I see something radical in the act of raising up one of your own as your hero rather than venerating the people you’ve been told are superior to you.

Remember, John Henry’s contest was versus a white man’s machine. It costs him everything, but he triumphs over the expectations of that steam drill salesman and proves his worth as a laborer and a person. John Cephas, a blues musician from Virginia who was interviewed by NPR for a report on John Henry back in 2002, had this to say of the myth:

“It was a story that was close to being true. It’s like the underdog overcoming this powerful force. I mean even into today when you hear it (it) makes you take pride. I know especially for black people, and for people from other ethnic groups, that a lot of people are for the underdog.”

Americans love underdog stories. Our own national origin myth is one! John Henry’s assertation of power and skill, the ballad’s declaration that Black people have the right to be proud of themselves too. . . no wonder this myth has resonated with so many people. No wonder it’s survived for a century and a half.

In this light, then, John Henry once again becomes a hero for us, the audience, to emulate. In the fight against oppression, endurance like Henry’s becomes key. Justice is almost never won quickly. The odds stacked against us may seem impossible, but it’s worth trying anyways, even if we have to fight to our dying breaths.

Artwork of John Henry as a defense worker by James Daugherty.

John Henry has meant and been many things to a lot of people in the past two centuries. A representative of capitalist exploitation, a cautionary tale for workers, an inspiration to oppressed people in America, even a communist icon—but I’d like to take a moment to talk about what his story means to me. It’s not something I’ve seen discussed in my research, and I think it’s worth exploring.

John Henry reflects fears of workers during the Second Industrial Revolution who saw how technology was evolving—how machines were being created that could do their jobs not just faster, but cheaper, because you don’t have to pay a machine like you would a person. They feared that they would be replaced, and that they would be left destitute while their former bosses grew richer and richer. And despite the centuries between us, this is a fear that I can understand.

Often, I feel it myself.

As an artist existing in online spaces during this new influx of AI-generated “art” and writing, I have witnessed many fears that we will be replaced by AI. Yes, there is a certain human quality to art that a generative learning model cannot replicate, but who’s to say that the much-vaunted free market will care? We can hope that art as a profession will survive, but we just don’t know.

In John Henry’s struggle, I see my own. In the steam drill salesman, I see tech bros on the platform formerly known as Twitter showing off their latest batch of beautiful, hollow, AI-generated “art.” I see John Henry’s passion, his pride, his triumph.

And I see hope.

By his life and death, the mythic John Henry reassures me that human beings aren’t so easy to replace after all. He tells me that machines can be defeated. That one day, my vindication as an artist and writer will come, and the world will see our worth.

The ballad of John Henry has endured like a mountain for a hundred and fifty years, and I hope it will survive for hundreds more—that John Henry’s hammer will continue to ring true throughout the ages. But in the midst of American mythos, it’s important not to lose sight of the historical facts behind it. Legends are interesting and inspirational and wonderful, but the real stories have something to tell us, too.

Don’t forget to listen.

Works Cited

American Lung Association - Silicosis

Ballad of America - This Old Hammer: About the Song

Constitution of the United States - Thirteenth Amendment

Encyclopedia Britannica - John Henry

Flypaper by Soundfly - The Lasting Legacy of the Slave Trade on American Music

Folk Renaissance - John Henry: Hero of American Folklore

How Stuff Works - Was There a Real John Henry?

ibiblio.org - John Henry: The Project

National Park Service - The Superpower of Singing: Music and the Struggle Against Slavery

NPR - Present at the Creation: John Henry

NPR - Talk of the Nation: The Untold History of Post-Civil War ‘Neoslavery’

PBS - Mercy Street Revealed Blog - Singing in Slavery: Songs of Survival, Songs of Freedom

Prof. Scott Reynolds Nelson - Steel Drivin’ Man: John Henry, the Untold Story of an American Legend

World Population Review - Incarceration Rates by Country 2024

#john henry #american mythology #analysis #essay #black history month #ari speaks #hi I wrote this for my english class and I felt compelled to share it here

9 notes · View notes

chewwypepsicola · 1 year

Note

ASKING YOU ABOUT YOUR AVA/AVM HEADCANONS!! I'D LOVE TO HEAR ABOUT THEM

I AM ABOUT TO GO CRAZY IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT...

okay lets start with just my hollowhead hcs brace yourselves i wrote a lot

SECOND/ORANGE: Second isn't actually all that fond of being called TSC he prefers to just be refered to as Orange since that way he feels less like the odd one out of the color gang, he already has enough w his big ass head! So he def prefers that name over his actual name, think of it like a nickname ! Another one, he has no idea of what he is capable of. LIKE. in AvA 5 showdown he gets his shit rocked and then unlocks his inheret hollowhead OP powers right? here's the thing, what if, while all of that was happening, he's completely unconscious and going on auto pilot? Not only does he pass out again and then wake up confused and in disbelief at seeing his friends alive but he is also very confused as to why Chosen bowed to him! He has no clue that it was *HIM* who saved the day and defeated Dark !! RAAHH !! That why we never see him use his powers again (at least fully, or conscious lol) Cause in ep 16 note block battle he had just woken up and in his half-sleep state he went there just to shut his friends up and go back to bed, in my heart of hearts the fuckin uh energy wave he produced wasnt even a conscious action!! And speaking of his sleeping habits, i think its pretty interesting to see him sleeping so much, i either think it has relation to his powers (even if showdown came after we started to see him sleeping constantly) just for the lols. Another one is that he's just narcoleptic haha

CHOSEN/TCO: Fucked up little guy he's poprtrayed as cool and level headed and serious by the fandom but all i can think of is back to him first being given his name and deciding to instantly break stuff and cause trouble, he is a menace!! I hc that he is angry a lot of the time, he's just a silent-rage type of guy, easily irritable and impatient, probably sarcastic and to-the-point when he talks I think he also sleeps a lot, like Second, but in his case he's just depressed el o el, he is also haunted by memories of his time being used by Alan/Creator as an AdBlocker cause that sure had to leave sequels, so he is depressed and thus sleeps a lot but then has terrible nightmares about being a prisoner and thus doesnt sleep but then gets tired and has to sleep a lot and then its just a terrible terrible cycle- He has decided to move on and "forgive" Creator but he still needs to go to therapy tbh One more for him is that he is both very caring to Orange and very scared of him. HEAR ME OUT, Chosen knows what this kid is capable of, he knows that Second doesnt know, and decides to keep it that way for both of their sakes. STILL, even if he is very intimidated by what his little brother can do he still cares for him and looks after him the way he wishes he would have been looked after, even if Orange already has a loving support system in the color gang Chosen tends to go out of his way to check on him, i think that Chosen yearning for family is fucked up and in character since he was the first one to get severly punished by their Creator and even if Orange doesnt need a loving caring family (he already has one) he's gonna give it to him godddammit !! (for both of them)

DARK/TDL: MY BABYGIRL oh god ohhh god Okay so to start off, middle-child syndrome. Lots of insecurities and issues with identity and finding out who he is and what is his purpose. Simple one: i think the bracelets he made to enhance his powers are now imposible to take off and got broken so badly that his powers are now nonexistent (or at least suuuperrr weak) cause of them malfuctioning. His insecurities come from being literally the weakest of the HollowHeads, imagine being one out of three inherently superpowerful (and probably inmortal!) beings in the world and then not even coming close to defeat either of them on your own. FUCKED UP! And we know he is aware of this cause he makes all of this technology to enhance his strength and be able to stand on the same ground as Chosen. He only won his second fight w Chosen cause of his gadgets and his bots. And even with those he got easily defeated by Second. In showdown, if we become a little bit crazy, you can interpret his desperation to kill Second as Fear. The moment he thinks Second is down he goes and tries to get his plan into motion cause who fuckin knows what might happen next . And, as he feared. Orange beats him up and all that he worked for is gone in seconds! And im not saying that him making all of those bots and killing innocent sticks cause they were in his way is okay DEF NOT but i think i can see where it comes from Here come in play his issues with identity, since being given a name he was going to be Chosen antithesis, the one to defeat him and forever be enemies, but he lost, and instead of finding doom at the hands of Chosen or at the hands of the Creator, he finds companionship and a brother in Chosen, both of them break out of what they were supposed to be and run away after causing a mess. Again mentioning how Chosen is the more destructive/chaotic one, i think that Dark held onto that and decided alright! this is me now! Just like him! Destructive. He makes that his entire personality and goal since he doesnt actually have any other. He was given a mission which was to destroy Chosen, he failed, and then he got a new mission, destroy Alan's PC, and then he, didnt have anything, just chosen, so he kept on destroying stuff, thats what they both did! And then, against his given interpretation of being a destroyer. he created something, he made viruses and bots yes, but he MADE them, he made himself something to be stronger, he had a plan that he was genuelly excited to show Chosen, like, "Look! I can get us revenge on the Creator, for what he did to you! For what he did to us!" ITS JUST SO. BITTERSWEET TO ME,, that when he thinks hes doing something by his own free will he's meet with rejection and told to stop, so thats why he sticks to it, he goes thru with his plan and decides hes not going to follow orders around anymore, this is what he is this is what he wants, he wants revenge, he wants to make the person that hurt him HURT. its so.... OUGH And then of course it doesnt work as he wanted. he loses yet another battle and is left alone to put himself back together, it makes me so so so sad to think about him badly injured and having to pick himself up and just. move on. In my perfect world after Showdown Chosen goes to look for Dark and they slowly but surely start to rebuild their relationship again.

ALRIGHT thats all i got now MAN i really have a lot of thoughts on this HJDASFHJSDHJF THANK YOU FOR ASKING DEAR ANON U MEAN THE WORLD TO ME, HAVE TINY DARK DOODLE <3 hes showing u the blueprints for his next project

#ene answers #ene does art #the dark lord #animation vs animator #ava #the second coming #the chosen one #TDL #TSC #TCO #please please keep sending me inboxes about any of the stickmen i am so insane about avm/ava #fuck it ava/avm request are available too

90 notes · View notes

bridgertonbabe · 7 months

Note

Does Franscescas story also include miscarriage and infertility?

I would be interested to know how her infertility affects her relationship with her family and friends.

What about Michael? What are his emotions like? What is the wizard perspective of miscarriage and infertility?

Is any Magic involved in making lil'John and Janet?

Anon asked: How is infertility treated in the Wizarding world? How would fran and michael make a family?

*Trigger Warning: this post contains mentions of miscarriage.*

From a young age Francesca always knew she wanted to be a mother and though she briefly wondered if Michael wouldn't be the type of person to ever want kids, seeing just how much he loved doting on their nieces and nephews affirmed that he would one day be the world's best dad. But they still had years ahead of them to start a family and both were content to continue the tour life and enjoyed travelling the world together.

It wasn't until Eloise announced her pregnancy not too long after Penelope's that Francesca brought up the subject of starting a family with Michael. While Eloise had been a mother to Oliver and Amanda for nearing ten years, Francesca genuinely never expected her sister to want to go through a pregnancy herself and what's more she was shocked that Eloise of all people was going to have that experience before she did. She was relieved when Michael turned out to be on the exact same page as her, having felt flabbergasted that Colin was beating him to fatherhood; and so they decided to start trying right away.

After a couple of months Francesca did fall pregnant, however she miscarried after only a few weeks. While it was upsetting, Francesca tried to be pragmatic about it and persevere, assuring herself that miscarriages occur in 1 in 4 pregnancies and it shouldn't discourage her from trying again. However much to her frustration almost an entire year went by before she was able to wave a positive pregnancy test in front of Michael - but unfortunately it resulted in another miscarriage. In spite of the disappointment, Francesca remained determined to get pregnant and once again she and Michael began trying.

However another year went by, during which time Penelope and Eloise each welcomed another baby with relative ease. As happy as she was to meet her newest niece and nephew, Michael could see the hurt in Francesca's eyes when she held Thomas and Georgiana for the first time. He knew just how badly she wanted to be a mother and carry her own child and he was suffering not because of struggle to conceive a baby of their own but to see his wife suffering no matter how hard she tried hiding it.

He resolved to do everything in his power for them to be able to have a baby and took charge; booking fertility tests, looking into IVF, reading up on potions that were meant to increase the chances of carrying a pregnancy to term. He hoped by taking even one of those steps that they'd be on their way to having a baby; however the results of the fertility test revealed that they had a very low chance of ever conceiving a baby naturally. As crushing as it was, Michael refused to let the odds stand in the way of creating a family with Francesca. After contacting the best potion masters in the wizarding world he acquired specialist elixirs that should help them on their way to making a baby, which they took while simultaneously having their first round of IVF. Michael had been trying to keep positive for both himself and Francesca, willing on for all of their efforts to work; and yet both the potions and the IVF proved fruitless, and after three unsuccessful rounds Francesca declared she couldn't go through with another.

After that Francesca couldn't even bear to talk about it, despite Michael trying to get her to open up. He became desperate to try and find some alternative way of conceiving, to the point which he began grasping at straws and looking into dubious potions being sold in Knockturn Alley and even unlawful spells that supposedly might work a miracle. He gathered all the information that he could and presented it to Francesca in a last-ditch attempt to provide her with the one thing she longed for, however Francesca lashed out and firmly told him to stop because if none of the conventional methods worked for them there was no way in hell that any of the nefarious alternative routes would work either.

For the next week Francesca didn't utter a single word to him and a distraught Michael took to sleeping on the couch just to give her space. Then at a family birthday party at Aubrey Hollow, Gregory and Lucy revealed they were expecting their second child; and it turned out to be Francesca's breaking point. She excused herself from the festivities and went up to her old bedroom where she proceeded to cry her heart out. She jumped when there was a gentle knock and told Michael to leave her alone but she was surprised when the door opened to reveal Sophie instead.

Sophie didn't hesitate to rush to her sister-in-law's side, holding her tightly as Francesca cried on her shoulder and the younger woman released all the heartache she had been suffering from over the last three years. When she was no longer able to shed any more tears, she told Sophie all about her infertility struggles, how devastated she was to miscarry twice, and how much it hurt that none of the efforts they had gone to had worked.

"It's not fair." she shook her head. "Eloise never even wanted to be pregnant. Since we were kids she always said she couldn't stand the thought of having a baby bump, and she always joked that getting together with Phil was a win-win because she had Oliver and Amanda without the aches and pains of pregnancy and childbirth; but then she still went on to have Penny and Georgiana like it was nothing." she vented, expressing all the underlying ugly bitterness that had built up inside of her over the years. "And then there's Daphne; popping out four kids in four years with barely any time in between to breathe. And don't get me started on Hyacinth having kids before me - and now Greg's having another baby; I mean, they're still just kids to me and they're already parents and I'm not... and probably never will be." she swallowed and looked away as soon as she saw Sophie tilting her head sympathetically at her. "It's just not fair. How come it's so easy for everyone else?"

Sophie's hand clutched hers as she tucked a loose lock behind Francesca's ear. "I miscarried." she uttered and Francesca snapped her neck to look at her. "Twice."

"Really?" Francesca gulped, stunned to hear that Sophie had experienced the same agony as she had.

"The first one I tried to forget about. It would have been a honeymoon baby and I miscarried early on. I didn't even know I was pregnant until the doctors told me. I couldn't believe it and I felt guilty for not even realising and for miscarrying in the first place. But I shrugged it off and told myself it would have been way worse if we had actually been trying and I had known and celebrated the fact that I was."

"What about the second time?" Francesca asked tentatively and squeezed Sophie's hand, communicating that she could take her time as she was sharing such a vulnerable time in her life.

"We had been trying. And we were so thrilled." Sophie explained and wore a sad smile as she continued. "We agreed we'd wait until the 12 week scan before we told anyone and after everything seemed alright we decided to announce it at Violet's birthday a few days later. But then when I was at work I suddenly experienced cramping... and I knew." she exhaled. "I knew I was losing the baby. Your dad took me to the hospital and called Benedict but by the time he got there the baby was gone. And I felt like my whole world had come crashing down. We begged Edmund not to breathe a word about it. I couldn't stand the thought of Violet or Daphne or Kate or Posy coming over to sympathise. I couldn't bear the thought of anyone who had only experienced successful pregnancies to be around me. And then at your mum's birthday someone passed Miles into my arms and I still don't know how I didn't break right then and there. Do you know what I did instead?"

"What?"

"I ran up to Ben's old room and burst into tears." she revealed, and Francesca's heart thumped emphatically; as heart-wrenching as it was to hear about Sophie's losses, she took comfort that she had done the exact same thing she had done by fleeing to an old bedroom to break down in private. "It was killing me to be around everyone else's babies without being able to call any of them my own."

"That's exactly how I feel." Francesca commiserated. "It's how I've felt for the last three years now. And I hate being this self-pitying jealous-ridden bitter cow. I don't want to feel so angry and sad without any let up... but I don't know what else to do."

"I can't imagine what the last three years must have felt like for you. And I know there's nothing I can say or do to ease your pain. But it's okay to feel everything that you're feeling. Don't let yourself feel bad for those negative feelings and don't be so hard on yourself for not being able to conceive. I know it's easier said than done but you've got to go easy on yourself; for your own sake."

Francesca nodded, knowing Sophie was right, and realising just how exhausting keeping all her emotions to herself was.

"How did it finally happen for you in the end? Did you have Charlie through IVF, or...?"

"We were prepared to try if it came to that." Sophie answered. "But when I was ready to try again we just took it easy. We didn't put pressure on ourselves to be fervently trying. We treated it as more of a let's just wait and see, and if it happens it happens and if it doesn't then we'll give fertility treatments a go. I let go of any expectations and just cherished being with Ben, and then a few months later we found out we were expecting and we had Charlie."

"The doctors said there's a very low chance of us ever conceiving naturally." Francesca uttered. "As much as I'd like to think that just going with the flow could work,"

"But they still said there's a chance." Sophie pointed out. "As low as it might be; there's still the possibility it could happen. I know you've been through so much disappointment and must feel so dispirited; but hold onto that hope. No matter how small it might seem."

After the sisterly heart-to-heart, when they returned home Francesca apologised to Michael for how she had treated him in the last week. It was an apology Michael assured her was unnecessary and he understood how soul-crushing the last three years had been; he was just sorry he couldn't provide her with the one thing she wanted more than anything else. She told him about her talk with Sophie and how they should give it one more year before looking into adoption, but in the meantime they could try without really trying.

And so they chose to let go of all of the heavy expectations that had built up and they had put upon themselves and accepted that conceiving a baby might not happen for them, but not letting that stop them from cherishing each other and getting in the way of their love... and just like that, one year later they welcomed their beautiful baby son, John.

#asks #harry potter au #franchel #michael x francesca #francesca bridgerton #michael stirling #tw miscarriage #sophie beckett

7 notes · View notes

cosmica-galaxy · 10 months

Note

Ohhh i'm gonna be real silly, self indulgent even, so here's a long one for you.

From what i've read the player is usually like 20 to 30 something years old, but like what if they were younger? In a world where murder is the norm, that can't be good for them, like I said in that one post.

I mean like yeah, you're not that yung but compared to everybody else in madcom? They would be so confused, how did a 17/18 year old (with godlike powers mind you) with no prior knowledge about weapons or firearms help them so effortlessly through wave after wave of danger. Back then when you hadn't been kidnaped you were so carefree yet caring for the boys and their health, now you're an anxious mess who clings to them for protection. Anything seems to set you off, smal sounds in the late hours of the night? The next day there's bags under your eyes, accidentally stubbing your toe or hitting your elbow? you're at the verge of tears, A gun goes off? Instant panic attack.

Due to this Doc wants to give you medication to help with the stress but he's afraid how your body would react to the medesun considering your different anatomy. so he (with your consent) takes samples of your body and studies them, like spit, skin, hari etc. Though he realizes that you seem calmer when you do smal tasks, so he assigns you puzzles to solve, things to reorganize and arrange to your heart's content, anything to get your mind off things, it's also kinda endearing and fascinating to him. It's not everyday you're in the presence of an otherworldly being, so in a further attempt at consoling you he asks about your hobbies, what you did for a living, you respond with short answers. It wasn't till the “conversation” went south and you started talking extensively about history, space and religion, among other things of your interest that were harder to describe, like games, and that they were in a game. Doc came to the conclusion that you just have an interesting way of explaining the unexplainable, like other worlds and dimensions beyond any grunt's understanding.

If you're this yung in Nevada of all places, and you react this badly to being misplaced into another world, fuck. Welp, congratulations, you got yourself a group of some protective motherfuckers, they would probably try to find a way to get you back to your own world, they can't stand seeing you this upset. Though in the meantime they would try to make it bearable. Keyword, try.

Deimos and Sanford would be like older siblings, Deimos the more chill and laid back that would let you get oway with things while Sanford is a bit more strikt, Doc is the resident's grandpa™ while Hank is the weird uncle.

Hank is very bad at comforting, big shocker, but if you want to be alone, he will leave the house, if you ask for a hug, he'll hug you. It's just that he doesn't know what to do next, so in the beginning it would be kinda awkward.

Sanford is a mama's boy, he's got more experience with stuff like this, kinda. He knows how to cook so comfort food is something he would be glad to make for you, if they have the ingredients, that is. Otherwise Deimos could stop by at Gils and get a burger from there. Hell, him or Hank could even bring you a hot dog from that one guy.

(heh, i've been listening to Shiny recently and was reminded of the line “i ate my grandma, and it took a week because she was absolutely humongous” and i can imagine Doc interpreting that as when humans grow with age they become taller and bigger. It's got the same existential dread of knowing the height of the teletubbies, if they are so massive and they're just infants, then how big are the parents?)

Also, if you were to have sibling(s) or parent(s) that you won't shut up about then that could imprint a “baby bird being taken from their nest and its parent is furiously looking for it” type of scenario so there's a sense of urgency in their pursuit of getting you home. If you're capable of changing time, materializing weapons and cars out of nowhere then what would your older family members be capable of? They may not get much from this but it's better than whatever wrath they could bestow upon them.

And like, Yo, platonic yandere SQ?

Skinner giving you a piece of candy after each check up no matter how minimal it was. Dave limiting himself by trying not to drink around you or as much if he knows he will be meeting up with you. Q Bert being wary of your sensitive hearing and puting silencers on the guns. Pava taking extra measures to make sure the food is to your liking. Bossman checking that the potential mercenaries he interviews don't have a motive to hurt you and are up to snuff with some very specific questions. Victor teaching you helpful skills if you find yourself in a tricky situation and he or the others aren't around to help. So in conclusion, no matter the circumstances they got your back, some in more subtle ways than others.

But that's if the SQ gets a hold of you first, or after, the Auditor and Phobos would be such a source of anxiety. The employees would have already known your age and have prepared for that, Phobos however? If there wasn't an age written in the file or a statement about your adolescence then he's sure to be surprised when he finds out his god is just coming of age. He would have to do so much backpedaling, not that he couldn't improvise but all those plans he made with you in mind were of you being an adult, not a “soon to be adult”. He's furious at himself if anything for not making the plans flexible enough if there needed to be changes. He had planned to take you on a tour around Nevada, a gala in your honer, a fucking press conferences. And considering the state you're in you don't even look like you could handle any of them. Ohhh. If he could die of failure it would be right then and there, but not in front of his god, despite feeling like he shot himself in the foot three hundred times.

And when the scientist trio catch wind of this, they all have pretty different reactions, Hofnarr might be curious and even eager to meet you but his concern outshines his desires once he gets the gravity of the situation. Christof, much like Hofnarr, was eager to meet you, until he realized that you're just entering adulthood. The actions of the employers enraged him that they would put you into a situation like this. And that Phobos constant attention seemed to keep you on your toes (god forbid if he makes you cry). He tries to make it better by suggesting that he's got something to show you, giving you an excuse to avoid the dictator. And Crackpot is just confused, if a bit miffed that you're hogging Phobos' attention (unintentionally) everytime you decide to come out of your room. Hofnarr would probably do something similar like Jeb by giving you something to draw on, to occupy yourself if Phobos insistent rants get annoying.

Phobos doesn't want to undermine you but by how skittish you are he can't help but baby you, of course you're nervous, this isn't your world, not your home domain, he bets that Nevada couldn't compare, and from the little he's heard from you he's right to think so.

On another note, I feel like you would accidentally discover some of your powers with the scientist boys, you would be going over statistics on a computer, bored out of your mind and nonchalantly ask “cool, but can it run Doom?”... It was history from there.

HOO, that's a heaping pile of informationone`! I do think that the Player, if an adolescent, would be considered very vulnerable to Nevada and it's share of woes. The Player would definitely have the SQ unit as protection and all of SQ making sure to take care of them. Meanwhile, the chaos of finally understanding that the god wasn't even FULLY GROWN is tough for all of them to sink into. I mean, what were you capable of becoming once you grow? I like to personally view it as young Players are typical consumers, they romp around worlds made by more experienced developers. Meanwhile, if they hone their skills enough and get the right tools together, they can develop entire digital worlds, similar to Nevada. So it's like the young Player has a potential to grow up and make worlds, which will probably make the grunts feel so shook.

#shegairownmyamo #haxorus imp #hax speaks #cosmica galaxy #madcom tag #long post

17 notes · View notes

shivunin · 10 months

Note

For the character impression ask game: Oghren, and also Alistair 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

Have a lovely day!!

Hello and thank you for asking!!

I hope you have a lovely day as well 💗

(Character Ask thing)

Alistair

First impression: I had a vague idea of who he is by the time I played Origins (I played Origins last), but my first impression was something like, "Aww he's just a funny lil guy."

Impression now: I don't think the first impression was inaccurate, but I do think he does a really good job of playing dumb (and I definitely bought it at first). I think it (and the joking) are a defense mechanism that worked well in templar training, so he's carried on doing it. He likes to be underestimated (especially when he does not want to be in charge!) and jokes are only one way he manages others' perceptions of him. It makes me extremely sad to think about how he's been searching for a family all his life, thinks he's found it in the Grey Wardens, and then loses it utterly.

Favorite moment: I really like the conversation that goes with his mother's medallion. Also the eulogy he gives if the HoF dies (I uh...played a Cousland once, they got engaged, and then she died 😬) but it's a really lovely speech.

Idea for a story: I have a loose outline for it, but I have plans for rewriting/writing around the hardening conversation (because I don't think it should happen in just one conversation). I think telling him to stand up for himself shouldn't sound like "get ahold of yourself." Also he and Wen going into the fight with Loghain, which is a scene I've been fiddling with for a while.

Unpopular opinion: If not for Inquisition, I would let him be a Warden. I think he'd be happier. Despite my dislike of Anora, she is a competent ruler. Alistair could absolutely be good at it, too, but I think life with the Wardens would be less isolating.

Favorite relationship: I mean! Wen and Alistair for life. Their friendship means so much to me. But as far as canon dynamics go, I like he and Zev a lot.

Favorite headcanon: I do not believe that Alistair is straight or cis. Not a very detailed headcanon, but there it is.

Oh, also, I like to pretend that he and Fiona get to meet eventually. In my head, that has happened. He deserves to know at least one family member and why their role in his life went down the way it did

Oghren

First impression: Oh cool, dwarf companion! Now I can finally get rid of all this booze I've been carrying for the whole game.

Impression now: Ahh man. Oghren. Could've been such a cool character. Could've supported the themes about being used up and discarded by people in power when you are no longer useful. Unfortunately, the constant sexual harassment is so off-putting that I cannot see past it. I think he's really interesting in theory, but like...his writers were on some nonsense when they put together his dialogue.

Also...the fact that without the gifts in the DLC packs, the only way you can befriend the alcoholic is to give him alcohol...doesn't feel great.

Favorite moment: I think his introduction in the Awakenings DLC is really funny

Idea for a story: Errr well! Wen almost kills him once. On account of the sexual harassment (and the fact that the particular brand of comments he makes really strongly remind her of Vaughan). Also her looming out of the corner of his eye whenever he's running late to visit his kid. He will be a good father or he will pay the price, and that is a threat.

Unpopular opinion: Idk! I think he is definitely a product of his time, so to speak, and the "edgy" tone they were going for accommodated this particular type of toxic masculinity. It's a shame, because I think a frank discussion of addiction and rehabilitation would have been really impactful, but...what can you do?

Favorite relationship: Having just read all of his dialogue with every companion, I am going to have to go with Shale. I think they have some interesting conversations about golems and dwarves.

Favorite headcanon: That he gets clean sometime in the course of Awakening and pulls it together for his family.

#i hope this is coherent i'm up later than usual (stayed up late so i'd be tired enough to sleep and you'll never guess what happened)#ask response #ask game response #oghren critical #i read his whole dialogue page sorry this took so long lol #i think i would've had more to say about ali but i did him second #i just think he needs a found family so much because he feels so adrift and it makes my heart hurt #somebody give this man a family pls

5 notes · View notes

missing-sock-misto · 2 years

Text

Cats Show Review: Denver 5/24, 5/25, 5/28

So this is a bit late. 😅 These notes have been typed up for a solid 2 weeks, I just never got around to finalizing them. :P

I went on three different days (it was kind of a mistake of scheduling, long story, but I regret nothing), and this review is going to be covering all of them together. The cast was the same for day one (5/24) and two (5/25), but different for Saturday’s (5/28). So the first two shows were pretty much the same, and the third had the most differences. (I do refer to Saturday’s show as “the third day/show” because it was my third show. It was not chronologically the third show they performed.

(Note: Travis was Tugger all 3 days. They just forgot to put his name on the board as a cover for the first two).

Bows: 5/24/22 Bows: 5/25/22

I also use the Broadway 2016 Revival as my biggest point of comparison, along with comparing the shows with each other.

I do take the opportunity to talk about the Broadway Revival choreography. I do keep it generally positive though.

If I refer to a stage direction, I’m talking about the audience’s pov. Note: -I am a huge Misto stan, so I basically tracked Misto through the entire performance. Most of the notes are on him. I’m also a huge Tuggofflees shipper, [though I will say in this version, I’d probably read as a poly Misto-Tugger-Bomba. Very, “Hi, this is my boyfriend Tugger, and this is his boyfriend Misto”]

—

(I did run into some formatting issues where paragraphs would get doubled, and if I deleted the duplicate a *different* paragraph would get deleted and doubled. If you see a paragraph get doubled, I’m sorry, I tried.)

I will start out by saying that I like the Revival choreography. While I enjoy the original choreography, (and there are some pieces that I do prefer the original for, or I’m sad that certain elements were removed), I overall really like the Revival choreography and the additions and changes it made, especially for Tugger and Misto’s songs. I think the Jellicle Ball is the one I feel the most conflicted about. It is absolutely ok if you do not agree with me on this, it is my opinion, but I do like it.

While Day One was good, I definitely thought it was the weakest performance. I’m guessing the altitude shift of going from sea level New York to “the Mile High City” of Denver combined with travel really hit the performers hard. I noticed people running out of breath during their performances or panting really hard at the end of a number.

However, by the second day, people seemed to have adjusted somewhat. And Saturday’s performance was fantastic. Definitely my favourite. Nick (Munk), Vinny (Alonzo) and Chelsea (Bomba) have deeper/lower registers, and having them there really helped increase the diversity of the vocal pallet. It’s still a very young sounding cast, but I definitely noticed a more filled out ensemble when they were there.

Plus, both Chelsea and Lauren (Demeter) have incredible voices, both powerful and show stopping but unique from each other. Having them together for Macavity and Glamour Cat was awesome.

I really enjoyed the cast

- Surprise standouts

Jennyanydots

Bustopher/Gus

Demeter

Due to the limitation of the tour set:

- No Aerial capabilities & no pyrotechnics

No trapeze,

No “climb up a wall”- with a cat scaling a wall on a wire, though Bill Bailey was hanging from the ladder

No aerial entrance for Misto

No wire removal for Griz

No pyrotechnics at the end of Misto’s number.

- Inflatable set so no trunk boot opening.

- Lighting- No “window” grids. Generally more limited lighting effects when compared to the Revival.

Overture- Invitation

Gorgeous lighting

Baby Griz gets the line “When you’re walking alone”.

Great enunciation. For the 98 film, I need subtitles in order to understand what they were saying. These guys, I could understand clearly.

Misto grabs the boot and passes it off to Tumble (I think).

Hand motions and symbols to represent the different “types of cats”. I thought this was a cute addition. For example:

Ie “Skeptical cats” the cats do a wide stance and put one hand on their chin, the other on their elbow.

Romantical Cats- Demeter & Munk hold hands and look at each other and smile. (I will say, while I preferred Nick’s voice, I think Taylor might have had better chemistry with Lauren).

Critical cats- they do a calculator typing motion?

Skimble takes the “There’s a man over there” line.

Gumbie:

First good look at Misto’s performance (well besides Invitation but run with me)

He has soo much energy, always smiling, and doing hard choreography. I have no idea how Paul is alive right now.

Due to the limitations of a tour setting, they took out several of Misto’s “magic tricks”. In Gumbie Cat, he’s supposed to create a light spot to conjure a window, spread the light open, and then open the car boot with magic. Misto does still create the light spot, but because of the lack of window grid lines, the light doesn’t look like it spreads? So he’s just twirling on the floor for what looks like no reason.

Plus, then the car boot doesn’t open with magic, she just crawls onto the boot, so he just goes “Ta Da!” It really makes Misto look like he’s showboating for no reason 😅

I don’t mind too much, because I love him, but it does look a bit off

Michelle’s an amazing Jenny, she’s gorgeous, beautiful voice, great tapper, loved her. A number of Gumbie Cats I’ve seen can be very “shrill”, but Michelle’s voice is super sweet, I got “motherly” vibes from her rather than “Mother Superior” vibes.

The kittens mess with the Gumbie Trio’s tails while doing the “and tie it into sailor’s knots” piece.

They only have 3 cockroach costumes, but they look nice, more like wheels than garbage bags. They use them less though.

Misto DOES NOT like the cockroaches. When they came out he would go on all floors and hiss/bite at them, then look at Jelly for approval.

While some cats are scrubbing the floors, Misto on top of the oven scrubbing the top of it. Others are cleaning the sides and throw their rags to him.

No exercise balls (Revival). Honestly, this was a good adjustment for me. I thought the exercise ball dancing was a recipe for disaster. I don’t know if this is a permanent adjustment or a tour adjustment.

Rum Tum Tugger

All right, I went in with low expectations for Travis, ngl. I basically bought tickets after seeing Zach’s TikToks and loving them, and being like, “yeah, I can trust this guy to do a good Tugger performance”. So when Zach left, Travis had big shoes to fill, and I had a LOT of baggage about (and investment in) this character.

I’ll admit, I didn’t like him in his first performance. I started warming to him after his song finished, but I was still pretty wary of him. (In his first performance, he was at an 11 in theatrics and very nasally, which I’m not a huge fan of).

However, I liked him more the second day, once I knew what his deal was, and actually enjoyed him on the third day. It was also interesting, cause he changed his performance slightly each time. Each day he dialed it back a little bit more. The first day he was particularly nasally and “immature” and he laughed hysterically in his entrance. For the second, he toned it down a bit. On the third, he sounded more… pouty? He lowered his voice and it sounded like he was pursing his lips or something a bit more while singing. He also barely laughed when he came out (and didn’t say “boop” when he kicked Munk’s butt, like he did the first two days. [That was a shame, I liked the “boop” :P] ).

(Note, he’s changed his makeup. When it was first announced he was taking over for Zach, he had an extremely contoured face that made his chin very narrow. By the time he’s gotten to this performance, he made it more natural, doing the cheek stripes and following the shape of his face better, and didn’t use as extreme contouring. I think this is a plus, I didn’t care for his initial makeup look).

Overall, I enjoyed his performance, it just took me a while to actually warm up to him.

- Misto:

Tugger and Misto look at each other very affectionately while doing the “And there isn’t anything you can do about it” leg sashays.

FYI Misto does not smack Tugger’s bum, that is an illusion on uppastthejelliclemoon’s boot due to camera angle. HOWEVER, it is pretty dang suggestive. I would say it was more of a “Hey there” or “call me later” something? Hard to describe.

After his quick dance with Tugger, Misto was ogling Tugger on all fours from on top of the car boot. Around the “bureau drawer” line, Skimble comes out and Misto excitedly paws at him and points at Tugger, like “Isn’t he great 😍” and taps at himself. Then Skimble leans in and starts lecturing Misto, and Misto is clearly not internalizing this message, (On the first and second day, he just full on ignores Skimble and continues watching Tugger excitedly. But on the third day he has the decency to sit back and look a little less excited… until Skimble gets off to help Jenny, and Misto goes right back on all fours and stares at Tugger with huge heart eyes XD).

Tugger dances enthusiastically with Cassandra

During the mirror sequence: Misto does an extra jump. [vs Revival]

The cats surrounding the Mirror do not stare at Tugger, but instead face at the audience. [vs Revival]

Misto is doing the Big Boy Choreography with Munk and Alonzo on the right side (Skimble’s doing it on the left side)

Tugger mockingly does the Big Boy arm wave, then scrapes his foot at Munk before pulling in Misto to do the lighting dance.

He still does the hip thrust when Misto goes through his legs! [Ok, part of me wants to talk about the different styles of hip thrusts that he did on different days… but I also really don’t. But they were different].

Misto was Absolutely Enraptured when started Tugger doing the “abouts”. This cat wanted to hear his boyfriend riff.

For shooing away his fan club, on the first two days he does a more annoyed “Ah ah ah ah” like “Do you mind?”. The third day he laughed first, did the “Ah ah ah” again, though it sounded slightly less annoyed, and also some “Tss tss tssts”, with a final “Meow.” I laughed.

Glamour Cat:

Tayler my beloved. Her voice is incredible.

There seems to be an interesting history between Jenny and Griz in this version. Jenny is usually the first to approach Griz, before turning and running away. I didn’t know how to read it, and it kind of depends on the age you want to put Griz at. She could be an old friend who lost her way, or maybe a kitten Jenny had helped raise.

Munk literally gestures for Griz to leave the stage, like “There’s the door. Get out.” Before Demeter starts singing. (Lauren’s Demeter is incredible. Her voice is smokey and powerful and just awesome. I saw she got to go on as Griz in June and I’m so happy for her, she has the voice for it).

And Chelsea as Bomba 🤩. These three powerhouses singing together, fantastic.

Bustopher Jones:

Is greeted by Alonzo, then later guided by both him and Munk

Misto slides off car boot and Victoria helps him fluff his fur

No street light for Misto to light up (Again, this kind of makes it weird that Misto gets a solo moment with a spotlight with Bustopher, because there’s no point for him to be the center of attention if you don’t know that that was a trick that was in the show).

I really like the dinner napkin flowing into a table illusion.

I like that they do the Macavity scare and then Bustopher says “Toodle Pip!” It makes the line make sense.

Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer

Amazing performance. This performance helped me realize that [in my opinion], this is probably the hardest number of the show. It’s JUST these two, and they have to do some very tricky, physically intense choreography, while singing well. And they have to be in sync.

They have nothing to distract from them and no one to support them besides each other. Super tricky number, huge respect to these guys.

I adored Allison as Rumple, her voice is sweet but strong. And both Mungos (Max and Brian) were great!

Old Duet

Victoria crawls to the front stage right to greet Duet first and is waiting by the wings when Misto brings him back.

After the song ends, Tugger helps Deut sit, and nuzzles his fur

Jellicle Ball

This is the piece where I think the rechoreography is weakest for me.

They do significantly more lifts in this version, and also throughout the whole show. I like lifts, this is a positive. But they took out and changed a lot of things I’m fond of.

After the Macavity scare, Alonzo Munk stay out, and Tugger is the first to come out when Old Deut starts singing. I am… not really a fan of this. It feels very, “the Big Boys are the brave ones” which feels more… stereotypical(?) than having the young and innocent girls (Victoria and Jemima/Sillabub) to be the first ones brave enough to come out.

Deut and Gus sing “Rollie Pollie” and “Gavotte and a jig!” I liked this, it made them seem like old chums who were jovial and got along,

Only Misto sings “Reserving our terpsichorean powers!” Not him and Munk together. (He also does a magic trick, I thought it was cool. He spins and moves the spotlight around the stage.)

Minuete- Tugger and Misto do a bit of the minuete together! The cats only do like one dance step, so it’s very quick, but I saw it and was very happy.

Lol, on the Saturday performance, the audience did NOT know when to clap. They tried clapping twice when all the cats paused when in the triangle formation. But at least they wanted to clap!

They took out the Boy Ballet, I was not happy. I knew it would happen, but I like that sequence for obvious reasons. (Honestly, they seemed like they took out quite a bit of Misto’s dancing in the ball. They did increase Jerrie and Teazer’s roles though).

When Bomba does her sexy girl cat dance, All the boys stand to attention and do bobs and arm raises, and Misto just leaves. (While he’s not the only boy cat missing, he is the only one to actively leave, and he also kind of draws attention to it by doing an arm flourish) I laughed so much. This cat is too gay XD

Tugger and Bomba run off together to… presumably have some fun.

After Tugger comes back, Misto sits on the car boot with Tugger and they hang out. On the first day, when Misto gets up to join the back of this line for his choreography, he paw bumps Tugger and Tugger gives him a little encouraging wave.

They reduce the number of whirligigs to one. I like whirligigs, this is a big negative.

Griz comes out early on, and mimics Victoria when she’s doing the pre-Pas de Deux with Plato. I got the sense that she *was* the Victoria of her generation, and was reliving her youth. It was… melancholy. I liked it.

(I also like that they establish more Plato/Victoria moments throughout the ball. That way Plato doesn’t come out of left field with his petition. They seem very cute and earnest, very “young love”).

Misto looks paired off with Jelly during the ball?

God I like this Pas de Deux choreography so much better. You mean Victoria doesn’t need to get her breasts raked by a guy while lying on top of another guy every night? Thank you.

When Misto is drawing attention to Griz to scare her off, he lights up the area around her, then runs center stage to do the head bobbles. He, Jelly and some of the others try to scare Griz off in the background, while Deut is actively trying to stop them. It isn’t until Munk scratches Griz when she runs off. Deut looked shocked and disappointed.

I did see/hear/read an interview where they said that Victoria is touched by every tom during the show. They did seem to keep this in place. (I paid attention when she and Tugger do a small bit of the choreography together and went ‘huh’.

After passing Princess Louise and until Ecstasy, instead of having everyone dance in a mass, they basically broke it up so two-four cats would do a piece of the choreography before passing the next step to a different group. I personally think this takes away a bit of the impact of the choreography, because there is something awe-inducing of having 22 or so people just dancing in unison.

My friend who I saw two of the performances with disagrees with me, as they felt that breaking it up made the stage feel more active and dynamic. Just to give the perspective of someone who wasn’t hyperfixated on the show.

I do like in the end after they do the “Drags”, they collapse in like a circular staggered pattern. It felt cool and flowed appealingly.

Memory:

Goddamn it, Tayler has a fantastic voice. Like, I cannot stress how much I loved her delivery.

ACT TWO

Gus

John Bow is a Great Gus. His voice is deep and resonant, and he has a fantastic charisma that just pulls the audience in. (He also made me feel better about Griz getting picked. I could believe this cat could make it another year for the next Jellicle Ball).

The audience laughed at the appropriate moments.

Throughout the first performance, Misto and Tugger kept trading glances over jokes. Tugger liked the oven and would sit on top of it a lot.

On the first day, when Gus prepped to do the “wail to bring on the ghost”, he coughed to clear his throat, and the audience broke out in a loud applause. Gus paused for a moment looking a bit confused, then went, “I haven’t done it yet!” in kind of playful exasperation. The audience settled, and then he did the wail, and the audience brought the roof down with their cheering.

By the second performance Gus learned his lesson, and didn’t clear his throat.

When Gus said the line, “I knew, how to act, with my back, and my tail”, Jenny flicked Skimble’s tail.

Pekes and Pollicles

Great dramatic lighting, very fun.

Am I a little sad that Munk didn’t get to be a director? Yes. But at least he was able to help, and frankly, anything that gets rid of Growltiger I’m all for. Plus they made little melody homages to Growltiger, which I thought was a nice touch.

When everyone’s getting ready to put on the show, Misto’s lighting the stage lights at the front, and in the back, Munk and Skimble are shooing Tugger off stage. He’s like “all right, all right, I’ll move XD”.

I might be reading too much into this, but screw it. So they have Misto and Tugger sit on the car boot together and they paw bump, so they’re obviously friendly. Then when the Pekes and Pollicles are coming out, they have Misto move so he and Tugger sitting in the back on opposite sides of Old Deut (Misto on tire, Tugger on car boot), like they’re trying to frame them as “opposites”. Idk, it feels like an enforcement of the “opposites attract” trope, which I’m here for.

(A general note, it was very cute seeing how Misto interacts with Old Deut throughout the performance. They seem to have a good relationship, and Deut seems to care for him like a (4th) son.)

“Winsome Chinese” thank god. I like, sighed with relief every time I heard it, even though I knew it was coming.

No bagpipes 😔

Tugger actually seems pretty interested in the story. He kept smiling and leaning in and stuff. He sat with Old Deut and held his arm throughout the performance.

Instead of shaking, like the Pollicles did when the Rumpus Cat emerged, Tugger shimmied on the first two days.

Skimbleshanks:

Chris is a good Skimble! He’s energetic, has a good voice, I enjoyed him a lot. They kept most of the choreography the same, so I can’t say too much.

They did have it so that Skimble doesn’t fall asleep during Gus’ song, he is awake, says hi to Old Deut, and then goes on top of the car boot to mime being asleep. I like this, as it keeps more to his character of being perceptive and alert, rather than having him be actually asleep for his introduction.

Misto and Demeter were cute and playing with each other in the background.

(Paul’s Misto is such a cinnamon roll, he was *really* happy to be the light of the train. He also kept bopping around with Demeter who was one of the front wheels.

Catnapping

I significantly prefer the Macavity of the revival over the original. Like significantly. I like the costume design better, I like the catfight choreography better. There are some really neat parallels between Tugger, Deut, and Munk with Macavity in this version too. Instead of doubles, they had Macavity’s laugh echoing and moving around the theater. I also think it does a better job of establishing Macavity as having mind control powers, what with him puppeting the cats around. (As a kid, I had been very confused by the kidnapping scene from the original choreography. I was like “Why is no one doing anything?” This is much clearer) I also like how Munk tries to save Demeter from getting hypnotized.

Macavity:

Lauren and Chelsea are such a powerhouse couple. Fantastic rendition of Macavity.

Macavity fight While all the girl cats are grouped together in their ending pose, Macavity creeps in amongst them, and then jumps out, as if appearing from nowhere. (I think this was super cool, but I do think they need something to distract from center stage while he’s doing it, cause all the girls are very skinny dancers and don’t obscure his entrance super well).

- Macavity walks off stage with his henchcats and “Deuteronomy” is brought back.Demeter realizes it’s a fake, and does her hackles raised run.

But what’s interesting is that when she passed between Macavity and Cassandra and Tugger, they stopped and started shaking their heads, and on the first two days put their hands to their heads. (Skimble was doing the same motions on the left side of the stage. I think there was a 4th in the lower corner, but I couldn’t tell who it was)

Then while she’s running to the other side, the four cats do like “On guard” poses, getting on all fours and planking, which they seem to do to communicate that they’re paying “intense attention” to something. (They do it during the Ball quite a bit when the girls are being sexy).

This was the first time I actually thought “Oh, Demeter is breaking the illusion.” At that point, it’s not fully broken until the disguise is removed, but the other cats are also able to sense that something is wrong.

It was really funny, because I just… had never thought of it as an illusion before? I don’t know what I thought it was. I think I just thought “stage magic. He was Old Deut, now he’s Macavity, let’s move on”.

Personal note: This is a fun element to support my head cannon that Tugger (and Munk) have low level magic. Cassandra is kind of mystically coded, and Skimble seems to have heightened senses (he’s the third to react to Griz’s presence in the Ball and is often quick to react/see something as wrong, but he’s usually sniffing the air. He also traditionally comes out sniffing the air during Jellicle Songs, like he can detect the audience. [They kind of enforce this by having him be the one who says the “man over there” line in the revival]. And because I follow the “Mac, Munk and Tugger are the sons of Deuteronomy” head cannon, and both Deut and Mac are pretty magical, I like the idea of the other two having low level emotion magic. And Tugger being one of the first that the illusion weakens for is something I’ll use for evidence :P

During initial reveal:

Tugger looked pretty distressed that it wasn’t his dad, (though it could be he was trying to hide his face to prevent getting mind controlled). But he crawled to the back onto the tire and kept his head down, staying crouched.

I think Sillabub was the only female kitten to not get mind controlled by Macavity. (Cough cough, I headcanon Sillabub as the daughter of Mac and Demeter, I’m using this as evidence that she’s more resistant to his magic).

Catfight:

Munk is absolutely eating it.

(He doesn’t do the thing where he’s also one of the mind controlled cats in the background and breaks himself out of it. He kind of, stands there and poses for a bit, like he’s about to attack, but hesitating. Personally I prefer it when he breaks out of the mind control.

Alonzo pulls at his own arms before intervening to save Demeter, like he’s breaking out of the mind control. After he breaks it, it seems like it breaks for the other cats soon after. I read it kind of like, Mac can control the masses, but once he loses one, it’s easier for all of them to break out of it.

In lieu of pyrotechnics, they set off strobe lights and play a crackling noise when Mac shorts the circuit. Honestly, I liked this a lot, it was very effective.

After confirming Macavity’s gone, Munk collapses, and everyone rushes to check on him.

He and Demeter nuzzle each other.

Mr. Mistoffelees

Alrighty here we go. My boy. My favourite song.

[Deep breath] [High pitched scream] I LOVE THIS CAT SO MUCH, Y’ALL!

Brief interlude to talk about Paul’s Misto. Listen, I don’t think Paul is the most technically (as in dance technique) proficient Misto. His flexibility is good, but not off the charts, and some of his leaps aren’t “effortless” looking or as clean as say, Ricky’s. But goddamnit I love him.

He’s SO energetic and enthusiastic. I think he took the “electric” word note and interpreted it as that. He’s Sooo Happy, smiling and grinning the whole time in the background. Plus, it’s super cute cause he’s all dignified and “aloof” (back straight, reserved facial expressions, calm nods and motions deliberate) whenever an older cat like Deut or Gus is around, and then TUGGER shows up for his song and Misto is the MOST Into it, (his motions compared to say Sillabub when Tugger’s preening in the mirror the first time is HILARIOUS, he throws his ENTIRE body into every action, I love it). He is over the moon for Tugger, it’s very cute. Plus he just becomes super excited whenever he gets to do something and breaks his more “aloof” and “reserved” persona almost immediately. He’s just such a fun and enthusiastic character to watch. So yeah, my heart melts every time I see him. I love him so much. Huge cinnamon roll.

- General notes on the choreography.

I really like the rechoreography for Misto’s number. (Again, this is my opinion, it’s ok if you don’t share it).

While I like the original, the bulk of it is one guy doing relatively simple choreography until you hit the conjuring turns. There’s really not a lot to look at.

A lot of the serotonin I get is from my personal investment in the character, but if I wasn’t so hyper-fixated on Misto, I’d probably get bored 😅

Additionally, the other cats don’t really get a chance to react or interact much, cause everyone besides Tugger basically take a seat and watch.

I like the rechoreography because it:

Has awesome lighting effects

Gives Misto center stage, but incorporates the other cats to emphasize his actions and also the music beats.

Puts a lot of action on the stage, making the number exciting and dynamic.

The Broadway revival jacket is the best addition, you have no idea how much I love that jacket. They were like, “Ok, listen, we’re getting rid of the rainbow banner. But don’t worry, this entire cat is going to be rainbow, and he’s going to make the stage rainbow, and it’ll be great.”

(Fun fact, my friend also went to see Sunday’s performance. They said that Misto’s jacket was on the fritz, it wouldn’t stay lit during his number, and then it was going off during Memory XD. I was glad I wasn’t able to see that show, it would have made me sad :P )

Updates the Old Deut reveal, thank goodness. Even as a kid I was unimpressed by the blanket magic trick. I like that they have a blanket homage, with the seven kittens (also a very fun moment), but the new reveal is communal, interesting, and much snappier.

Plays up certain themes of community and actually includes the magical exhaustion trope.

I like the ending of this song a lot better. With the original jump-splits, roll, then lift; unless it’s done extremely fluidly, it can be really easy for the audience to think the first sound cue is where they’re supposed to clap, because it’s a really dramatic choreography moment combined with a dramatic sound cue. But when he keeps moving for the roll and lift, you can hear the audience go “Oh wait, we messed up,” and it makes the ending lose some of its punch. By making it a musical reprise then solid music cue, rather than a double ending, it maintains the energy of the number and doesn’t make the audience feel bad for clapping, because it’s clear it’s not the ending. (Plus his ending pose being him holding his “bowtie” is cute 😝)

I like the idea that Misto tries bringing back Old Deut on his own with the Conjuring Turn (when his jacket is fully rainbow and pulsing, he’s at his max power), but he still doesn’t have the energy to do it. He collapses. So then he has to take a moment, regroup, and is like, “I can’t do this alone. I need the help of the Tribe.” So he distributes the magic to everyone (to charge individually or something), and together they are powerful enough to bring back Old Deut.

I could talk more about my thoughts on this, but this section alone is 1000 words, so no.

- So:

No aerial entrance. But… here’s the crazy thing… I think I like this entrance more? It’s great, cause they don’t do the “I’m just going to walk in from the wings”, which is my least favourite entrance cause it’s so… boring?

What they do is they have Tugger start off center stage elevated when he starts his introduction. Then he walks off the tire, they focus the spotlight on Tugger and darken the ambient lighting. Then Tugger moves to the front left of the stage to give the “you have seen it one moment- out on the lawn” line. Then with the musical cue; Misto appears centerstage on top of the tire, jacket pure white, spotlight on him, stars and string lights in the background flashing briefly. I honestly loved it, it’s snappy, fast, and looks magical, especially if you don’t know it’s going to happen and don’t look for the dark glimmer of Misto getting into position in the background. I can’t believe I’m going to say it but I actually like it more than the aerial entrance.

{Listen, if you made it this far, here’s an extremely grainy gif, congrats}

Tugger was doing a very good job being a supportive boyfriend. Very “look at this guy, isn’t he amazing?” He was constantly smiling and gesturing at Misto throughout the number.

When Misto lights up Cass’ fur, the light effect does more of a “bloom” than it just appearing. I liked that.

When Misto goes to the left to pass by Tugger before returning center stage to do the Conjuring Turn, he gives Tugger a little head bump.

Conjuring Turn: Ok, I know they took down the number of Turns from 24 to like 11. But I’m honestly really okay with this. It is a super hard move, and can be really hard to execute, and hard to execute well. And here’s the thing, in the original choreography, basically the whole song builds up to this one, extremely impressive, show stopping move. But… I’ve seen quite a number of Misto’s trip up here, and let me tell you, it sucks the energy out of the room. (Heck, it’s pretty rough on understudies, cause they don’t get to practice it as much.) I’d much rather have a more distributed spectacle, with a lot of things happening throughout the entire number, and have an easier Conjuring Turn that you’re going to get more reliable results with.

When Misto goes off stage to recoup, and all the cats are dancing, Tugger is dancing extremely enthusiastically in the background.

During the light flashes, after coming back from off stage, Misto does a few poses. I couldn’t tell what the first one was, but the second was the “paws together and extended” pose that Paul seems to like taking pictures doing, and the third he does a ‘tipping an imaginary hat’ move. When the lights come back on, he rubs his hands together in an anticipatory fashion, like “alright, here we go, try two!”

When Misto picks up the lights, there’s no one else besides Tugger on stage. Tugger looks around and starts waving people in so Misto can yeet lights at them.

After Old Deut is revealed, Tugger looks extremely happy, like “the mad lad actually did it look at that!”

Misto turns his back and starts preening, cleaning his fur, getting neatened up. Then Tugger says his name, he turns and does a dignified bow, then Deut does a “Get over here!“ hand gesture, and Misto does his running jump into Deut’s arms.

Before the hand hold step, Tugger and Misto shimmy at each other, and then Misto kind of combs his hand through Tugger’s ruff while he leans in like he’s nuzzling him.

They have my favourite hand holding orientation! Misto is centered, with Deut and Tugger on either side of him. (Demeter and Munk are holding hands on the second row). [My least favorite is when Deut is centered, then it’s Tugger, Cass and then Misto.]

Misto is SOO shiny, when they focused the spotlight on him, both in his reveal and his closing spotlight, his costume throws sparkles all over the theater. Like, you could see sparkles in the balcony, on the walls, it was great.

I had so much fun watching, I would literally just start shaking from endorphin overload XP

Memory- Heavyside layer

God, Tayler’s voice is so good. Her emotions, her vocal power, absolutely loved her. She killed it.

They have a paw shaped platform slide out from the left. I’m glad about that, I seem to prefer it if there is some sort of prop that takes Griz away, rather than her levitating away via wires.

So yeah, I really enjoyed the performance! If you got this far, congrats! Here’s a link to the boot I took on Saturday as a reward. :P

Act 1

Act 2

#cats the musical #show reviews

16 notes · View notes

tttrashmouth · 1 year

Text

okay i feel like in the apocalypse timeline that raph died before casey was born, in fact, i think he was their first casualty at the very beginning. maybe this is all based in incorrect info so ya know, if i sound insane don’t mind me. this is also really rambley and might not make much sense so read at your own discretion.

so, let’s start with the fact that casey tells us in his timeline the portal was opened up on metro tower, just like in the good timeline. of course, the simple answer is that they moved the entrance from that boat dock island thing or whatever to metro tower for access to a bigger portal, but why on earth would they do that?? closing the portal and moving the key would put them at risk. also, they were already starting to open the portal on the island anyways, so why would they fully open it on the ground, close it, and then move it. it could be an ego thing for the krang to have it that high up but idk. because in the good timeline nothing is changed up until casey jr comes, which means everything should be the same pretty much. which means in the bad timeline the foot clan would have taken it to the boat dock first. also, okay, there’s also the chance the mad dogz didn’t go after the key in the bad timeline, but once again, literally why would the foot clan/krang move the key. it doesn’t make any sense. plus it’s clear that there was a decent amount of time in between the key being stolen and then opening the gate. enough for them to get home, have their fight, for april to nap casey jr, get him to the lair, for him to wake up from passing out, explain how he’s from the future, and for splinter to drop the krang lore. while i understand that it’s a cartoon and it can be exaggerated, but cmon. i’m sure, in the bad timeline, there was enough time for them to have their fight, april to probably come to the lair (because she probably just was anyways, let’s be real) and for splinter to find out the foot clan is up to something again (raph would for sure tell him). i think, with splinters development throughout the series he would have taken it seriously and they would have went after them anyways, despite leos complaints.

okay so why? what happened? what changed?

(besides casey jr being their their first, which changes everything)

imo, it’s not what you think it is. see, leo is a little asshole in the movie, all of his complex’s are clearly rearing their heads at the highest level possible. i think, in the bad timeline, whether or not casey jr is there, leo still goes for that key. it makes full sense that he would. they would have over heard the foot, splinter would probably have realized what was happening and obviously wouldn’t have time to explain everything but could maybe at least hint to them that this was Bad bad, plus they would have LITERALLY FOUGHT THE KRAANG HEAD ON. their mystic powers were gone, but these guys are clearly a huge threat. leo is a now or never type guy and this was a now or never situation. if i’m right and they did still confront the foot clan that night in the bad timeline, i am almost 100% certain leo would go for the key and raph would still be kidnapped.

so now it’s just a matter of divergence. obviously the timeline diverges the second casey jr enters the good timeline, but where does it all actually come to a head? what scene hinges on casey jr being there 100%. if he isn’t there, what is the turning point.

the scene when him and leo get stuck after the initial entrance to the subway under metro tower. without that, leo doesn’t fully realize how bad everything’s going. he might have a small “oh shit i should listen to these fools a little more” but i’m sure it’s not the same horrific realization he gets when casey jr tells him he’s literally the last of his brothers standing in the future. so, he meets up with mikey and donnie they find out about raph being krangified, they lose the key again and all of them but raph have to flee

and see, this is the make or break, i think at least. the hamatos, minus raph, standing on that rooftop, looking over the already catastrophic damage to nyc. in a timeline without casey, what do they do?

i think they have to retreat. in there minds they have to wait, get everything together, form an actual plan. i think that’s the moment where everything diverges. personally, in the bad timeline, i think raph died a krang zombie. i also think that they wouldn’t just tell people that their oldest brother literally died a krang zombie, i think they would want to go with a sort of true explanation to honor his memory better. everyone (minus leo, mikey, donnie, splinter, and april, maybe draxum and casey sr if they’re lucky), would just know of raphs last moments, sacrificing himself so leo would escape the krang, because that was the moment raph died pretty much, it would be the last time they saw him dekrangified). i feel like it would make sense that casey didn’t know. they never offered up the information and casey knew it was a hard topic for them all and never really pushed. of course he would tell the good timeline that all this never happened if he didn’t know or was even told he went down fighting or something.

okay this was super rambley but i had to get it off my chest. the original storyboards of the intro where they hung up raph and donnies shells kind of disproves this, but also, it’s my canon now/j. i know everyone has there own thoughts on how raph died and how long he survived but i like my way because 1) it makes sense to me and 2) the angst potential goes crazy

#i think about the rise movie daily #and so many people have shared how they think raph died in the bad timeline #so i thought it was my turn #but this is also long as shit so if you don’t want to read all that it’s fine #rottmnt #raph #leo #leo rottmnt #raph rottmnt #raphael #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt 2018 #casey jones jr #i feel like these are the right tags #everyone else is pretty much just mentioned like one time

6 notes · View notes

lacklusterhero747 · 1 year

Text

Building a Fabula World, Part 2d

Okay, so... last post about the kingdoms and regions of the world, I swear. It just turned out there was an incredible amount of text that went into our world building efforts. Finally, however, we have reached the finish line.

The Free Marches - Provided by me

A wide swathe of lowland, swampy territory that owes no fealty to any other nation. It sits at a crossroads between the other nations and a band of loosely associated towns and cities send representatives to an annual Moot to discuss policy for the betterment of the alliance, and for the purpose of its mutual defense. Because The Free Marches relies on an extensively networked adventurer's guild for defense against monsters, the region has a reputation for producing capable units of mercenaries and storied heroes, as well as cunning thieves and irredeemable rogues. The Marches are a place where you can, at your will, establish your own town or dominion, so long as you have the will to do so and the strength of arms (or followers) necessary to hold that ground. While the Marches has a reputation as a land of bandits, it is also home to the decadence of casinos and resorts evocative of a place like Las Vegas or Monte Carlo along it's coastal shores. Obviously more established national powers have a vested interest in either allying themselves with the city states of the Marches, or in conquering the territory for their own, but each is moving in its own ways and thus none have truly managed to get a leg up in this quiet, cold war. The Free marches is also filled with the massive, cyclopean ruins of the Precursors--an ancient race said to have been wiped from thousands of years ago--and these dangerous places are infested with ancient magic. It is said that the great, yawning crater that lies deep with the swamps of the Marches is where the star that killed the Precursors fell.

For classes, we decided it seemed like Furies (berserkers and the like), Rogues, Sharpshooters, and Wayfarers (well traveled generic hero types) ought to come from here.

With the Free Marches out of the way, we've come to the end of what we created during the session where we did the world building. After that, I took everything we had and did a little bit of brainstorming. This is turn lead to a few extra regions which I added to our shitty little MSpaint map, and I'll just add those here as some bonus content:

The High Fane Woods

A huge stretch of great forests that stands to the north of the Free Marches and roughly east of the Alumen Dominion. The trees here are ancient, towering towards the sky like the ancient redwoods of the pacific northwest. Here The Folk live their nomadic lives, traveling through the shades underbrush as they follow the Pulse of the World Tree. Only occasionally do they build permanent structures here, and these are often build high above the ground, clinging on to the bark of the great trees like barnacles for safety from the megafauna sized beasts that roam the floor of the dark wood. As the name suggests, The Folk see the wood as a their temple to the natural order of things and they treat living here, in harmony with nature despite the challenging risks as their fundamental form of worship. Thus they are incredibly defensive of their forest home and seek to do whatever is necessary to drive invaders who would exploit it for natural resources from its borders.

The Northern Snow Fields

North of the High Fane Woods stands a mountain range (whose name I have not come up with yet) known for its treacherous terrain and dangerous monsters. Beyond this wall of ice of stone lay the Northern Snow Fields. Little is definitively known about this region because it is harsh and uninviting towards any who would dare visit. Snow storms rage frequently, and the temperature is said to be able drop low enough to freeze the blood in your veins. What is known for certain that even here, Precursor ruins are known exist, having stood the test of time and the environment. Some theorize that perhaps there is some great, lost treasure here. A secret of the ancients that was meant to be kept hidden, thus it was locked away where none were likely ever going to survive to reach it. This is, however, just speculation. Still, with the advent of Arcane Distillate and the magical Industrial revolution, The Alumen Dominion has established an outpost on the northern shore of the Snow Fields, hoping that their new technology and mastery of "magic" in its now more controlled form might allow them to learn the secrets held by this remote region.

The Isle of Salis

This island off the northeastern shore of The Alumen Dominion was, once upon a time, a simple archaeological curiosity for the petty kingdoms that would ultimately form the Dominion. Remote and undisturbed, historians and would be scientists alike flocked to the tiny island to comb through the Precursor ruins they'd found there. Labs were built, research conducted, and progress was made. Ultimately, it would be here that the technique for creating Arcane Distillate was discovered, and this very act somehow prompted the entire island lifting from the cold northern oceans and seating itself among the clouds. How this was done has remained a tightly held secret of the scientists of Salis, and even the Dominion does not truly know. Nominally, the Dominion considers the island as part of it's territory, or at the very least a protectorate, but the island itself has different views. They share their technological advancements freely with those who are willing to listen, especially those willing to donate to the furtherance of science and research, and to their erudite minds their island is the property of no kingdom. They seek only to work and to be left in peace, and want nothing to do with the growing conflicts of their ground dwelling brethren.

So there we have it. A relatively complete picture of the continent upon which our stories will unfold. Already I can think of ways to draw each faction into a grander story, and with the addition of an ancient precursor race in the mix now, so many interesting possibilities for mystery and discovery enter into the mix as well. I can't wait to see how the party will get drawn into the various political squabbles they've already set the table for in the world building, but we'll get to that when we get there.

Next post I'll be moving on with the rest of the world building steps, so we can look forward to Historical Events, Enigmas and Mysteries, and Threats in the next couple of posts.

#role playing games #fabula ultima #world building #ttrpg #jrpg #play to find out what happens

2 notes · View notes

trekkiehood · 2 years

Text

Never Again (Part 3) - SPN Fanfic

@febuwhump : Day 28 - Presumed Dead

Title: Never Again

Part: [1], [2] 3/?

Fandom: Supernatural

Words: 2.7k

Setting: Stanford Era, Brotherhood AU, 9/11/2001

Whumpee: Dean (Mentioned)

Caretaker: Caleb, Mac

Other Characters: Samuel (OC)

Ship: None

Ao3 Link

Summary: Dean is working a job with Caleb in NYC trying to distract himself from Sam’s departure for college, when the Twin Towers are hit in a terrorist attack.

Trigger Warnings: 9/11, fire, death, building collapse, medical talk, general 9/11 trauma

Authors Note:

Dean is 22 Sam is 18 Caleb is 30

TW: 9/11, fire, death, building collapse, medical talk, general 9/11 trauma

Authors Note:

I. Am a liar.

Hello!

Not only did I *not* post this on 9/11. This also *isn't* the last chapter!

I really thought it was going to be.

I really did.

But then I saw that I was almost at 3k words and went lol I haven't even gotten to the plot yet. So here we are! Another chapter!

Luckily it fit with another Febuwhump prompt because it'd be great if I could finish it sometime this year.

I had to switch POVs half way through which I didn't want to do but it was the best way to get everything done. And surprisingly, I like it.

Anyway, normal warnings apply.

And please forgive Caleb. He's going through a lot.

Enjoy!

~TH~

Doctor Mackland Ames had seen things in his life. He had seen death. He had seen debilitating injuries. He had seen evil men get away with far too much and he had seen supernatural beings on a scale that few would believe.

But he had never seen anything like this.

Downtown New York always had an air of chaos surrounding it. Businessmen running late for work. Parents trying to keep hold of rambunctious children. Street evangelists. Local venders. Everyone all at once. It seemed almost the entire world vying for your attention as you walked down overly crowded streets.

Today was different.

This was not the chaos of life in a big city.

This was the chaos of a world at war.

Of singed ties and ash covered suits. Of children crying in confusion and parents clinging to them as if they had any power to protect them from the horrors they were seeing. Cries and prayers to God coming from the strongest atheist. People handing out bottled water and bandages, not asking for anything in return. So many people and yet so few in comparison. It seemed that any semblance of normal had been ripped away and everything familiar was forever gone.

And the sky.

It was so empty.

The loss of the tallest, most prominent buildings in New York was disorienting. How often had he looked to the World Trade Center to find his sense of direction? It was always there. It was the staple of the city. And now it was gone. What could be seen through a gray ashen haze was less than what should be there. The emptiness of the New York skyline seemed to translate into what he was feeling.

The overload of psychic sensations would have been enough to drive him to madness if he didn't continually reinforce his walls.

And he wasn't even a strong psychic.

He thought briefly of his son and, as selfish as it was, hoped the psychic fog or "hangover" would keep him down for a bit longer. While it was possible that Caleb could use his abilities to help, it was more likely he would get overwhelmed and collapse again.

Mac's own abilities were better suited for this type of search and rescue but- but he couldn't right now. Everything was so psychically distressing. Any attempt to feel outside of himself - even trying to sort through his own feelings - would keep him from being an efficient doctor. And that's what was needed right now. He couldn't do anything to help those missing. There were too many. And he couldn't waste time on searching for people who were already dead when those who survived currently needed him.

And he was trying very hard not to place Dean in one of the two categories.

He didn't have the time or energy to deal with either possibility.

"Dad, do you have any more of this gauze?"

The doctor looked up, his son had a pinched look on his face, the migraine was clearly close to bringing him down. "Caleb, I told you to go lie down. You were unconscious for nearly three minutes." Mac had been concerned that the psychic backlash of the collapse had caused actual damage to his son's brain. Eventually though, Caleb had awoken with a headache and after a few moments of confusion, had sharpened to an almost unfortunate clarity.

Macklad had tried to convince his son to remain at home while he answered St. Vincent's call for help. He should have known better. Caleb was stubborn, and worse, worried. But the "psychic hotline" as the boys sometimes referred to it, had been offline since then.

Caleb was still clinging to hope. They had no confirmation that Dean was still in the building when it went down. There was enough time for him to get out. They had talked to survivors from up to the ninety-first floor. Dean had been on the eighty-eighth. It was possible. Mac thought this stretched hope was the only thing keeping Caleb from completely falling apart. If Dean was dead-

"Dad!" The doctor snapped his eyes back to his son. "You good? You spaced out there for a minute."

"Yes, yes I'm fine, just- just tired."

Caleb gave him a disbelieving look. "Maybe you should lie down for a minute."

"No, I'm fine. There's too much to do. And they'll be bringing in more people soon." Hopefully. So far there'd been discouragingly few survivors.

There had been a few minor scrapes, but overall most of the people who had come in were suffering from either asthma or panic attacks. There should be more injured people. Because if people weren't coming in injured then that would make them… dead.

Mac looked away, trying not to let his thoughts shine through his eyes. "Get some rest if you can. I still don't like that you were down so long."

A twitch of a strained smile. "You too, it's not all on you, Dad. There are plenty of doctors."

"All the more reason for the architect to sit this one out."

Caleb rolled his eyes, "Point taken and ignored."

Mac gave his son's arm a gentle pat. "The gauze is in the cabinet by the desk."

~SPN~

Caleb had never been interested in being a doctor. He knew how to suture and was extremely well versed in first aid, but his adoptive father's life had never been for him. His dad had been an architect and his mother a painter. He'd chosen their footsteps to follow and he'd never looked back.

Days like today reminded him why.

Putting buildings together was so much easier than people.

Not that buildings were all that reliable either it seemed.

But that was part of a long list of things he was trying very hard not to think about.

Trauma wasn't new to Caleb. He'd seen his own family murdered. If that wasn't traumatic nothing was.

But this was different.

This was trauma on a whole new scale.

The patients coming in - he knew there were way less than there should have been, they all did - were more mentally traumatized than physically. There had been nothing that a little gauze and an oxygen mask couldn't fix. But it was the panic. The hysterics. The emotional turmoil and chaos that made Caleb glad his psychic powers were currently offline.

The idea of sitting at home and watching the news while other people did all of the work was overwhelming. If he thought they'd let him downtown he'd be helping on a different scale. But he wasn't an idiot. That would cross a line with his dad. And he didn't know if the first responders had created a barricade to keep people back or not.

But if Deuce was out there somewhere-

And if that wasn't at the very top of the "under no circumstances think about" list.

Dean was out there. He was. And he was fine. He was stronger than this. He was healthy and young and if these middle-aged businessmen could make it down eighty plus flights of stairs then surely a twenty-two year old hunter could.

But he wasn't going to think about it. Dean would get in touch. Or meet back at Mac's. Or waltz in helping victims before rushing out to help more.

That was Dean.

And he was fine.

If Caleb could just bury himself in work- in usefulness- then maybe everything would stop reminding him of his idiot best friends.

Like that ugly bright orange tie.

The one just like he'd shoved at Dean the night before.

The one that Dean had not wanted to wear but Caleb had made him.

The Auburn tie that Caleb had gotten at graduation but never really worn.

The one like the man in a wheelchair was clutching like his life depended on it.

Caleb quickened his step.

"Hey!" He said too loudly. "Where'd you get that tie?"

The man looked at him with surprise. He probably hadn't even realized he was no longer alone. No one seemed to be fully with it today. Caleb knew he certainly wasn't.

"I'm sorry?"

"The tie. Where'd you get it?" And Caleb didn't know how he knew. But he knew it was his tie. He knew it had been the tie that Dean had left Mac's with this morning.

The man blinked at him. "Th-this I- The man- kid really- who saved me. It must have loosened because it fell when- and I used it to cover my mouth-"

"The kid, six-two? Lighter hair, shorter cut? Green eyes?" Caleb could feel his heart pounding. This was the first time he'd heard anything remotely relating to Dean since this morning. Since before the entire world collapsed around them.

The man stuttered for a moment. "I- he was tall. Strong. He carried me from the eighty-third floor. I think his hair was short. Could-couldn't really see his hair color. But his eyes- his eyes were definitely green." He was rubbing the tie almost obsessively. Trying to gather strength.

Caleb didn't care.

"Did you get a name?!"

The man bit his lip and nodded. "Dean. His name was Dean."

Caleb didn't know what he was feeling. It was all the emotions at once. Hope and fear and joy and terror. He didn't know what exactly he was feeling but he knew that his stomach was in knots over it.

"Do you know where he's at? Did he come out with you? You said that he carried you, did he bring you here?"

He watched as the man clenched his jaw, looking away, then finally shaking it. "He-he collapsed on the thirty-second. Some firemen came and one carried me out but-" His lip wobbled and he cleared his throat. "We made it out barely a minute before the whole thing came down. There's no way- I'm so sorry."

And with those words Caleb's world collapsed as quickly as the towers.

He took a step back, now it was his turn to shake his head.

No.

It was impossible.

Deuce couldn't be dead.

He wasn't allowed.

He was a freakin' kid.

Caleb had practically forced him into this case. Trying to keep his mind off of Sam.

He couldn't be-

He couldn't be dead.

Trapped under thousands upon thousands of smoldering steel.

Dead.

"-orry, I don't- I don't know why he even stopped." Caleb's mind broke from the water it had been shoved under and his hearing returned. "I couldn't get down on my own but he stopped when no one else did and he carried me even though- even though he was bleeding. And he carried me until he collapsed himself. He could have saved himself but he stopped for me instead and I don't know-"

Caleb stopped listening, ripping the tie out of his hands. He could see it now. The blood splattering across the neck of the tie.

And he felt hate.

A hate he hadn't felt in a long time.

Reaves didn't know who this man was but he knew that his life wasn't worth that of Dean's.

He didn't care if it made him selfish.

He didn't care if it meant another family would mourn.

So long as it wasn't his, what did it matter?

So long as it wasn't Dean.

But it was.

And this man was alive while Dean wasn't.

Because he had still been in the building.

And there was no way.

No one could survive that.

He stumbled back still holding the tie. Clutching it like it was a physical lifeline between himself and his best friend. His dead best friend. Like he could tap into some of his father's ability and track Dean and prove that he was alive.

Black was beginning to encroach on his vision. He put out a hand, catching the wall in an attempt to stay upright.

"Caleb, Caleb, son, can you hear me?"

The man in question blinked away the haze. He wasn't sure how much time had passed or what had happened. Standing in front of him was a very concerned Mackland Ames.

"You back with me?"

"Dad?"

The doctor frowned. "I want to get you in for an MRI. We're not busy at the moment and it won't take long-"

"He's dead." Caleb interrupted.

Mac stopped, mouth still parted. "What?"

Caleb shoved the tie at him. "He didn't make it out in time. Stopped to help people like a freaking idiot even though he was already hurt. Last seen on the thirty-second floor only minutes before the tower fell. He didn't make it out."

The great Mackland Ames was speechless. "How do you-?"

"I'm sorry," The man was back, had he left? Or maybe he had always been there? "I'm sorry but- I was- I was the last one to see him. He- he- collapsed and a fireman stayed with him and one left with me. I never saw him again and we made it out only moments before- I'm sorry. He saved my life."

And for a brief moment all other emotion was replaced with anger. He shoved forward, dislodging his father. "This is your fault!" He snapped. "If he hadn't stopped to save you-"

"Caleb!" Mac planted himself between the two men. "This is no one's fault but the men who hit the towers."

Reaves clenched his jaw and fisted his hands. He wouldn't throw a punch at his father but only years of hard earned respect assured that.

He turned on his heels and headed through one of the doorways. Mackland was close behind him.

"Son, stop for a minute, please."

Caleb did so, turning to meet his father. "What do you want me to say? I'm not wrong! If Dean wasn't such a self sacrificing idiot then he'd still be alive!"

"And that man would be dead."

"So?! Am I really supposed to be thankful that some random guy I've never met and never will again is alive? He's not important!"

"Dean thought he was. He was doing what he was trained to do."

Freaking John Winchester and his freaking training.

That caused Caleb to pause for a moment. Fine. He'd fight fire with fire. Storming away towards the closest exit may not have been the most mature response but it was better than some of the alternatives.

"Caleb, Caleb where are you going?"

This time he didn't stop or turn. "You were right. The ones at fault are the ones who started this war."

"What's that supposed to mean?" And he could hear the panic and couldn't help the twinge of guilt.

"It means fine. I'll take the fight to them."

"Caleb-"

"Johnny always wanted me to join up. Looks like he's gonna get his freakin' wish."

Today had been a day of unpleasant surprises and they continued, as he certainly was not expecting the psychic force that slammed into him, pressing his back against the wall. Mac rarely used his telekinesis to the point that even his son often forgot it was one of his gifts.

"He will not." His father snapped. Mac's eyes were bright as he held his son in place.

"Let me go!" Caleb tried to pull away but couldn't.

"No. I will not let you do something foolish out of grief or anger. You will calm down before I let you go. I will not let you dishonor Dean by running into danger in some twisted form of vengeance. I will not let you become another John Winchester!"

Reaves closed his eyes, letting out a breath. "And what if when I calm down I still want to join up."

"Then we will discuss it and if it's truly what you want to do then a few days won't change anything." A brief pause. "I have a feeling there's going to be a lot of enlistments in the coming weeks." He finished in a low voice. More of his inner thoughts than an attempt to portray information.

Caleb let out another breath. "Ok." he said firmly. "I'm calm."

Mac gave him an appraising look before releasing him.

"Now, I want you to go into the waiting area and wait."

"Dad-"

"Help people sign in. Direct gurneys. I don't care just- just stay out of trouble until we can sort everything out."

Caleb nodded despite himself.

"Dad-" He tried again.

"Don't Caleb. I can't right now. We can- we can work it all out later."

The doctor turned back towards the main hall. Caleb's abilities still weren't fully online but he pushed out his message anyway.

Mackland stopped. He didn't turn around but his shoulders slumped slightly. "I know, son. I love you too."

~TH~

haha

I am evil

I know

I take great pride in making Line scream after reading my ending at 2AM.

Again, forgive Caleb he's not doing so hot. And this is NOT a place to get into the US response to the attacks. I don't think Caleb has much care for the politics he's just "Dean is dead must avenge" in the same way he'd go after a supernatural attacker. So while I love discussion and will gladly talk to you about the events please do not throw around political accusations. Thanks!

Now that that's out of the way. What'd you think?

I really was planning the reunion this chapter. Had it in a different Febuwhump day and everything. But I got too into and decided to cut it off here.

Would absolutely love to hear your thoughts, ideas, predictions.

Much love and God bless,

Jamie

#9/11/2001 #9/11 #TERRORIST ATTACK #TWIN TOWERS #FEBUWHUMP2022 #TRAPPED UNDER A COLLAPSED BUILDING #TW DEATH #TW DEATH CAUSED BY DISSABILITY #TW FIRE #BUILDING COLALPSE #MY FANFIC #MY FIC #MUSIC #DEAN WINCHESTER WHUMP #BROTHERHOOD AU #SPN FANFICS #febuwhump28 #presumed dead

5 notes · View notes