#also their favorite realm is the vault. must see all the books

[plutonium-sky]

Unofficial question giver (I ended up naming them Mori) wip~ done on magma and I am currently in the process of coloring them

[alj4890]

Crack Fic Request

(Psych! X Choices: The Royal Romance) as requested by @krsnlove 😂

A/N WARNING This is pure crack. I am combing two of my all time favorites: Psych and The Royal Romance cast of characters. If you haven't ever watched Psych about a fake psychic detective, please...do so. You have no idea the laughter that is missing from your life. If you are a fan of delicious flavor, then read on.

I have no idea who to tag other than my other fellow Psych lover, @hopelessromantic1352

Masterlist

History? What About Her Story?

"My love, have you seen the book you gave me on our wedding day?" Liam walked along the shelves of the palace library, searching each brown leather spine.

"No. I don't believe I have seen it since the reception." Riley set her book down and began to help him search. "Did you allow someone to borrow it?"

"No." He frowned and called for Bastien. A search was conducted with no results.

"It has to be somewhere in here." She muttered.

Maxwell and Drake joined them, bringing Hana and Olivia. After much discussion, Maxwell offered to call in a favor.

"I know a guy who is able to solve these type of mysteries." He pulled his phone out and scrolled through his contacts.

____________________

Santa Barbara, California

"Chief, the psychic realm is buzzing with gossip and a little ethereal bird told me to stop by." Shawn announced, bursting in on a meeting between Chief Vick, Head Detective Carlton Lassiter, and Detective Juliet O'Hara.

"Mr. Spencer, I don't know what birds are whispering in your ear but they need to remind you not to interrupt a meeting." She said in a frustrated tone.

"Sorry Chief, but when they tweet, I must answer. Usually with hashtags. Right, Gus?" Shawn turned to his best friend and partner.

"It's true Chief. He uses an unusual amount of hashtags." Gus added.

"Dude! You know my Twitter followers need to be in the know. I can't just offer a thought without a dozen or so carefully phrased hashtags to explain it's significance." Shawn reached over for Juliet's doughnut and was immediately batted away.

"Jules! Sharing is caring." He reminded her.

"If there are doughnuts, we need to be made aware of their location." Gus searched the room and looked out toward the main room of the police station.

"Enough!" Carlton yelled. "Spencer, you and Gusster go find a doughnut and leave."

"Come on, Lassie. Don't you want to break bread with us. Or a doughnut as the case might be while we discuss the next step in our investigation?" Shawn tried to secretly slide Juliette's doughnut his way, earning another slap.

"I would rather go to a hot yoga class with McNabb." Carlton uttered in a deadpan voice.

"Well, I for one am ready to find this Corduroy antique." Shawn said sitting down and propping his feet up on the table.

"Cordonian." Gus corrected.

"I've heard it both ways." Shawn quickly repsonded.

"Shawn you didn't even know it was a country." Gus added.

"Gus, I can't help that the psychic tweets didn't give a geography lesson with the message. There's only a limited number of characters allowed." Shawn argued.

"Gentlemen!" Chief Vick interrupted. She stared pointedly at Shawn until he took his feet off the conference table. "Due to the international attention you and Lassister and O'Hara have gained with past investigations, the King and Queen of Cordonia have asked the four of you to come help find out what happened to one of the king’s prized possessions. The mayor insists you go to show how Santa Barbara is keeping up international relations."

"The tweets never lie." Shawn said, a smile lighting up his face. "What type of clothing should we pack?"

"It's in the Mediterranean." Juliet told him.

"So, snowsuit?" Shawn asked.

"Be ready to leave first thing tomorrow morning. King Liam is sending his private plane for you." Vick flicked her hands for them to leave.

__________________

"Gus, I was meant for this lifestyle. Private planes. Servants. Ruling over a small country. Adored by my people." Shawn reclined in the Corinthian leather chair as the plane flew over the Atlantic.

"Dude, your people would overthrow you within a week." Gus muttered.

"And what a glorious week it would be." Shawn replied.

Gus glanced behind him to where Juliet and Carlton were sleeping. "What did Maxwell tell you?"

"Some brown book filled with the country’s history is missing. The queen presented it as a wedding gift. Who gives their spouse an ancient book as a gift on their wedding night? Do you think there was underwear in it? I bet--"

"Shawn." Gus attempted to reign Shawn's ramblings in.

"Anyway, they can't find it. So it is up to us to find out who took it, why they did, and where it is now."

"Great. Did Maxwell offer any leads?"

Shawn frowned. "No...but how many people actually were in a small palace of a tiny country?"

_________________

Liam and Riley walked with Maxwell down the corridor. "A psychic?" Liam asked again. "I can't believe we invited a psychic detective to assist in this."

Maxwell nodded. "Shawn isn't some run of the mill psychic. He has solved numerous thefts, murders, even stopped a notorious serial killer. I think he will have this book back in your hands by this evening."

They walked into the study and warmly greeted their guests.

"Maxwell!" Shawn walked up and fist bumped him. "How long has it been?"

"Um...I want to say a two months since I was in Canada. The whole book tour being interrupted by Pierre Despereaux's thefts was when we last met." Maxwell explained.

"Thefts?" Riley asked.

"An international art thief, your majesty." Juliet explained, dropping into an awkward curtsy.

"Please, there is no need for any of that." Riley said with a smile. "I'm still not used to it. Every time someone needs a refill on drinks, I hop up to get it."

Juliet laughed and clapped her hands. "Your story is the stuff of dreams. I love how you and King Liam met."

"O'Hara." Carlton muttered.

"Right. Sorry." Juliet straightened up beside him.

"Can you tell us if you have any new staff, possibly seen anyone suspicious around the book?" Carlton asked.

"No, most have been here for years. The ones visiting the palace are nobles and friends that have never caused a problem of this sort." Liam explained.

"Of this sort?" Gus repeated. "So there have been problems?"

Liam shared a loaded glance with Riley. "I recently created a council of both nobles and commoners to help my queen and I rule to the best of our abilities. After the terrorist attacks from the Sons of the Earth, I wanted to try and not allow a situation like that to develop again."

Shawn raised his hand to his head. "I'm sensing that there were a few who did not agree with this."

Riley nodded, eyes wide. "There were some, one in particular, Lord Neville."

"The singer of Tell It Like It Is?" Shawn asked.

"That's Aaron Neville." Gus corrected.

"Right, the quarterback for Green Bay." Shawn asked.

"That's Aaron Rogers!" Gus exclaimed

"Right. Love his neighborhood." Shawn put his hand back to his head. "I'm sensing that Lord Rogers--"

"Neville." Gus whispered.

"That Lord Neville might wish to get back at you. Mayhap even--" he turned to Gus. "Did I use mayhap right?"

"Yes." Gus answered

"Too pretentious?" Shawn furrowed his brow.

"A little bit." Gus shrugged.

"It's this setting. I mean look at this place. Velvet sitting chairs. Who has this? Really, even velvet drapes? Does Elton John visit?" Shawn walked over and lifted the red drape.

"He has..." Liam replied, trying to keep up with Shawn's thought process.

"Is he planning on visiting soon?"

"I--" Liam shrugged. "I don't think so."

"Hmm. To solve this mystery, I am going to need to become one with this palace. I am going to need to eat what you eat. Sit where you sit. Touch what you touch." Shawn winked at Riley, earning a smack to the back of the head from Carlton.

He glared at Shawn before turning to Liam. "Rest assured that O'Hara and I will do all we can to solve this for you."

"If you wouldn't mind, we need to speak to your head of security." Juliet added.

"Of course, right this way." Liam and Riley walked out with the two detectives.

Maxwell grinned. "Alright guys, show me that magic you did in Canada."

"Oh you will see the magic." Shawn promised.

"We got magic for days." Gus added.

"At least for a couple of hours." Shawn corrected. "Maybe an encore card trick or two."

Maxwell chuckled and finger gunned them on his way out. "Great. Let me know if you need anything."

"Magic for days? Really Gus?" Shawn shook his head and left the study.

"What? The man asked for it. What was I supposed to say? Shawn!" Gus ran after him.

__________________

"We start with the list Maxwell gave us of those that are normally in the palace." Shawn explained. "From there, we can easily say Neville did it and we receive some kind of royal award, like a spare chest of jewels or a quick swim in the gold vault."

"Liam is not Scrooge McDuck." Gus reminded him.

"Are you saying he doesn't have a gigantic money vault that he secretly swims in while wearing a bathing suit from the turn of the century?"

"Yes. That's what I'm saying."

"Well, that's disappointing." Shawn muttered.

The pair stopped by an office and knocked. When they opened the door they saw a petite, strikingly beautiful blonde filing some papers. "Who are you?" She asked, eyes narrowing.

"My name is Shawn Spencer and this is my partner, Sir Spinsalot. We have been asked to assist in locating the King's missing book."

Madeleine sat down behind her desk. "And?"

"We were wondering who you suspected." Gus leaned closer. "A lady of your talents of changing the minds of the people should have a few suspects in mind."

A proud smile formed. "When King Liam chose an American waitress as his Queen, there were some that were less enthused with his choice."

Shawn zeroed in on her fingers tensing, the old issues of magazines behind her desk, and the faint tan line on her ring finger. There was also a flyer partially hidden with the word rebound on it. A sticky note had a m and a f with groups of numbers listed. 1728 and 1817 were written down. "I'm sensing that these nobles preferred someone else. They wanted you to be queen."

She momentarily stilled. "Yes they did. After my upbringing as the Countess of Fydella, I was the natural choice as queen."

"I bet they were disappointed when Liam ended your engagement." Gus added.

A hard glint came into her eyes. "I suppose so. Who wouldn't wish for one trained since birth how to run a country and interact with nobles and dignitaries around the world without an entourage to constantly tell her what to do?"

"Good to see you're not bitter." Shawn stood up. "Thank you for your time."

"Do you think she did it?" Gus whispered as they walked down the hall.

"Nah. She has moved on with this new position. Plus it looks like she is getting some type of rebound counseling after being dumped. She's the kind that has to be needed." He explained.

"I think I could need her." Gus grinned, brushing his thumb across his nose.

"I say this with all the love in my heart. Something is wrong with you." Shawn stepped outside.

__________________

"He did it." Shawn nodded toward a man dressed in a demin shirt talking to Juliet.

"What? That's the King's best friend!" Gus exclaimed.

"Doesn't matter. He did it." Shawn persisted. "Only a thief would flirt to distract the investigation."

"He's not flirting. Juliet is." Gus pointed out.

"Man." Shawn shook his head and walked over.

Juliet was smiling. "....I named him Sprinkles because of his dappled coat."

Drake's smirk appeared and he looked up as Shawn and Gus approached. Juliet turned and introduced them.

"Drake, this is Shawn Spencer and Burton Gusster."

He nodded to them. "How's the investigation going? Any leads?"

"It's going." Shawn answered. "I'm not at liberty to reveal any parts."

Drake cocked an eyebrow. "You're not at liberty?"

"That's right, Jack! The psychic's relationship with the visions he is given is precious. Has to be nurtured. It's a circle of trust and it gets upset when I share its secrets with suspiciously handsome dudes that flex their muscles in a barn. Or stable. Is this a stable?" Shawn pulled the door open.

"It's a stable." Gus decided.

Juliet looked up in silent frustration. "Thank you Drake for your time. Guys, I will see you back at the palace." She walked away.

Shawn noticed Drake checking Juliet out and spoke harshly.

"So what do you do here?"

"Er...I do...things." Drake muttered.

"What type of things?" Gus asked.

"I...you couldn't really put a name on it. I do a variety of...stuff." Drake stuttered.

"Is theft of antique cornucopia history--" Shawn began.

"Cordonian." Gus corrected.

"Cordonian history rank as one of your things?" Shawn asked.

Drakes eyes narrowed. "What? Are you actually accusing me of stealing from my best friend?"

"No!" Gus said while Shawn said, "YES!" At the same time.

Drake glared at them and stormed off.

"What's his problem?" Shawn asked.

"Shawn, you just accused the man of stealing. What did you expect?"

"I don't know. Maybe point me toward the most likely suspect. Didn't he seem a little more secretive than one would normally be?" Shawn asked.

"Maybe. Why?" Gus watched Drake walk into a hidden side door.

"I think he's hiding something." Shawn motioned his head in the direction Drake disappeared. "We need to keep an eye on him."

___________________

"There has to be food somewhere in this joint." Shawn muttered.

Gus threw his arm out, stopping Shawn. He took a sniff and turned down a hallway.

"Super sniffer activated. What!" Shawn exclaimed following his friend.

"Do you smell that?" Gus asked, stopping again.

Shawn took a deep breath and let out an exaggerated moan. "It smells like heaven's bakery: one filled with cinnamon, sugar, chocolate, and our third grade teacher Ms. Ferguson wearing that sundress on field day."

Gus closed his eyes in memory. "You know that's right. Every teacher should look like her."

They stepped into the kitchen and watched a lady in a pink dress remove a tray of snickerdoodles from the oven. She brushed her long dark hair back and began to place the cookies on a cooling rack.

"I'm in love." Gus whispered.

Shawn nodded at the vision before them. He walked up to her with a look of wonder on his face. "Excuse me, but are you an angel?"

Hana looked up and giggled sweetly. "I know you! You're the private detectives Maxwell called in." She wiped her hands before holding one out. "I'm Lady Hana Lee."

"My name is Shawn Spencer and the suave gentleman stealing cookies is my partner, The Duke of Earl."

Gus quickly swallowed and gave a slow wave. "Hello."

Hana's grow furrowed. "The Duke of what?"

"Earl. But you can call me Slade." Gus replied with a seductive look.

Hana nodded and motioned toward the counter covered in sweet treats. "Please, help yourself. I tend to overdo it when I bake."

"That is impossible." Gus muttered. He took a bite of a still warm brownie and rolled his eyes in pleasure. "I'm proposing to her tonight." He whispered to Shawn.

"Tonight? I'm proposing marriage this afternoon. She can't be real." Shawn filled a plate with a variety of sweets and sat down. With a mouthful of food and a few moans of pleasure he began to question her. "Lady Hana, have you noticed anyone acting suspicious lately?"

She poured them each a glass of milk and chewed on her bottom lip. "No."

Gus slapped Shawn's hand away from his plate. "Stop playing Shawn!"

"Come on son. You grabbed the last of the macarons! The least you can do is offer one or two."

"Not my fault you took your time with the magic bars." Gus countered.

"They literally have magic in the name. They taste like what I imagine Siegfried and Roy playing with baby tigers feels like." Shawn reached over again and shook his head when slapped. "I can't believe how greedy you're being."

"I don't care." Gus replied in a high pitched voice.

Hana laughed and went over to one of the containers filled with more macarons. She offered it to Shawn and blushed when he exclaimed over her. "I don't care what you say, I can see your wings and halo."

"This is what nice people do Gus, they give." Shawn held up the cookies Hana handed him.

"Suck it Shawn."

"You suck it."

They began to talk quickly over each other and suddenly stopped. Shawn took a drink of milk and focused on Hana. "I'm sensing that you have seen someone you are close to acting odd recently."

Her lips parted in surprise. "Yes, I have. But he couldn't have taken the book! He is much too loyal to ever do something against Liam."

Shawn placed his hand to his head, closed his eyes and slapped Gus for trying to take another brownie. "I'm sensing that the one you are worried about is Drake."

Hana gasped. "Yes! Maxwell told me you were the real thing, but I couldn't believe it."

"I am merely the vessel," he slapped the back of Gus's head for trying again, "that the visions use. Now, would it be too much trouble to find something we can use to carry all of this with us?"

______________

“I don’t like this.” Gus whispered as he crept behind Shawn through the dark palace halls.

“Drake wasn’t in his room. It’s two in the morning. Where is he?” Shawn responded. “I’m telling you, he is up to no good.”

“You’re just jealous that Juliet was flirting with him instead of you.” Gus muttered.

“Please. Me? Jealous? Just because Jules basically giggled like an eighth grade girl over that ridiculously good looking man means--” He held his hand up and stopped Gus. He pointed down another hallway where he could see Drake standing in front of a door.

“What’s he doing?” Gus asked.

Shawn moved in an exaggerated manner to hide behind a suit of armor. He motioned for Gus to follow. He shook his head no. Shawn began to motion faster while Gus silently argued back. They did rock, paper, scissors three times with Gus losing. He snuck over.

Drake looked behind him before knocking in a strange pattern. After a few moments he tried the pattern again, his brow furrowing with the continued silence that followed.

Shawn went to move to another suit of armor, only to end up frozen with a sword to his throat.

“One more move and you and your little friend will be a shish kabob.” 

A sultry red head moved out of the shadows and narrowed her green eyes at the pair. “What are you doing here?”

Drake turned around and glared. “It’s those psychic detectives Maxwell called in.”

Olivia kept her sword against Shawn’s throat.

“You would need at least three more.” Shawn suddenly said.

“What are you blabbering about?” Olivia demanded.

“For kabobs.” Shawn continued. “Everyone knows that you can’t just have two things. You need something to make the kebobs pop, like onions, tomatoes, something green. Most add some zucchini yet I think bell peppers add more zing--”

“SILENCE!” Olivia said over his ramblings. “Why are you following Drake?”

“Could you lower the sword?” Gus asked.

She dropped it down. “Now talk before I change my mind.”

“We are searching for the cornstarch--”

“Cordonian!” Gus corrected yet again.

“Cordonian history book.” Shawn finished.

“They think I took it.” Drake folded his muscular arms across his chest.

“Why would Drake steal the book? It is only about nobles and ancient scandals. I think one of the last entries was from 1817.” Olivia noted. 

Shawn thought back as his brain flashed to that post it note with that particular year listed. He raised his hand to his temple. “I KNOW WHO STOLE THE BOOK!”

________________

Everyone gathered half asleep in Liam’s study. Shawn stood in the middle of the room. “I’m sure you all wonder why I asked you here.”

“Cut the crap Spencer.” Carlton replied. “We know you have some half cocked theory that will somehow be correct.”

Gus shrugged when Shawn turned to him.

“Really you too?” Shawn asked. 

“It’s late Shawn.” Gus countered. “We flew across the country and the Atlantic ocean to get here. I haven’t slept in thirty-six hours. You know how I get without sleep.”

“Gus, don’t be that can of Coke Zero. Bring back the sweetness.” Shawn pleaded.

He turned back to the group. “This missing piece of history isn’t filled with only boring facts. No! I sense that it is filled with the dirty secrets about what goes on in the unknown, deep, dark recesses of this palace.”

“It’s actually pretty bright everywhere.” Maxwell spoke up with a yawn.

Shawn ignored that. “Even though the scandals go back thousands--”

“Hundreds.” Gus whispered.

“Hundreds of years.” Shawn repeated. “They are still ones that some will want to remain in secret.”

“Who wouldn’t want that?” Drake muttered.

“Someone wanted to erase these recorded memories. Someone who has already gone through humiliation. Someone who doesn’t want their name added to their ancestors’ naughty times. Isn’t that right...LADY MADELEINE!”

Madeleine paused yawning. Her eyes widened for a moment. “I beg your pardon!”

“I can see it all now.” Shawn stood over her. “You were already sick of seeing your name in the magazines as the jilted fiancée of the King. When Riley asked you to be her publicist, it was a slap in the face for a Countess and former Queen in training. But you took it, because your family name was on the line. You had to correct your image somehow. What better way than to appear not only fine being pushed aside, but also being magnanimous to the foreign interloper.” 

Madeleine stared silently at him as he continued.

“It was going well until Riley decided to present Liam with a rare and very odd wedding gift. Seriously. Naught underwear is what all men want for gifts.” Shawn turned to Riley and Liam. “Back me up on this guys.”

“It’s true.” Drake muttered.

“Drake!” Riley exclaimed.

“No, he’s right, blossom. It is all we want.” Maxwell added.

Riley blushed and turned to Liam. “Were you disappointed?”

Liam shook his head. “Of course not. I love everything you have given me.” He frowned at Shawn, Drake, and Maxwell. “Proceed Mr. Spencer.”

“If only Riley had not found it.” Shawn continued. “You didn’t realize what it had until you flipped through it. Then you saw what your ancestors did. It wasn’t just on your mother’s side in 1728 that your people got into trouble, but also on your father’s side in 1817. After a little bit of research and the help of Olivia’s memory of your father being from England, it seems the former Duke of Karlington was involved in trying to overthrow Queen Charlotte. Couldn’t have that be discovered, could you?”

Madeleine glared at Olivia. “I should have known that a descendant from traitors would make certain to point out other decent noble’s despicable relatives.”

“You took the book and decided to have those pages removed. But how to do it in a way that Liam wouldn’t notice?” Shawn interrupted before Olivia could retaliate. “You needed to have the book taken apart by a specialist and then rebounded. Simple glue apparently wouldn’t do with the old leather. That’s why if we go to your desk we will find a brochure for a book binding place called Rebound.”

Madeleine paled. She stood up and lifted her chin. “Yes, I took it. If I refuse to recognize my ancestors that betrayed their monarchs then no one else should.”

Gus and Shawn shared a fist bump as Liam had Bastien lead Madeleine away.

Once she was gone, Shawn turned his sharp eyes on Drake and Olivia. “I see what the big secret is. I wasn’t sure which John Hughes movie you were. I thought maybe a gender switched Pretty In Pink. But now that you are all together, I see you guys are The Breakfast Club.”

“What?!” Everyone exclaimed.

“Olivia is Molly Ringwald. She’s rich and fallen for the less economically sound tough guy, Judd Nelson or Drake in this instance. Liam is Emilo Estevez. Nice. Popular. Everyone likes him. I guess that means Riley is Ally Sheedy. Hmm. Hana doesn’t really have a character. We could make you the principal but that just seems mean. Maybe the little sister to Anthony Michael Hall...but you’re too sweet for that too.  Maxwell...you’re Anthony Michael Hall but way cooler.” Shawn pointed at each one. “And just like in the movie, Molly and Judd are meeting in secret to be together.”

Everyone stared at the duchess and the commoner that were both speechless at their secret being discovered.

“And my work here is done.” Shawn exclaimed, rubbing his hands together. He walked over to the door. “If you will excuse me, I’m going to catch up on that sleep everyone was mentioning earlier.”

_____________

“I am going to miss this country. After Hana refused my offer of marriage, I guess this will only be a fond memory.” Shawn said as he boarded the plane with the others.

“I’m just glad she made us going away bags.” Gus opened his and frowned. “Shawn! Where are my cookies?”

“Hmm? Seems like another mystery.” He held tight to his bag as Gus demanded he either share what he had or return what was stolen. “Man, I didn’t take your cookies.”

“You must be out of your damned mind if you think I believe that.” Gus argued. The best friends began to talk over one another, bringing up the great cupcake incident of fifth grade.

Juliet sighed as she sat down with Carlton. “It’s going to be a long flight.”

Carlton nodded. “Good thing I stole Guster’s bag of baked goods.” He offered a cookie to Juliet. She glanced at Shawn and Gus before biting into a chocolate chip cookie.

[cromulentbookreview]

All Snake-Fascinated

“There was one time when we were children, he... he transformed himself into a snake, and he knows that I love snakes. So I went to pick up the snake to admire it, and he transformed back into himself and he was like, "Mblergh, it's me!" And he stabbed me. We were eight....at the time.” 

Or: LOKI: Where Mischief Lies by Mackenzi Lee!

I will have to admit to some difficulty writing an unbiased review of this book. Not that I normally try to be unbiased here – I mean, nobody reads this and I don’t care, I just like talking about books. But, still, with this particular book, the bias is pretty damn strong. OK, so I am a huge fan of Mackenzi Lee. I may have mentioned that here before.  Because I am a shameless fangirl who very much enjoys her writing style, I will pretty much read anything Mackenzi Lee writes. And, as someone whose general philosophy towards Marvel Movies is “shut up and take my money,” when I heard Mackenzi Lee was going to be writing a YA novel about Loki…yeah I’m pretty sure I may have broken the sound barrier. It doesn’t help that my favorite Marvel movie of all time is Thor: Ragnarok (honestly, Taika Waititi should have directed all the Marvel movies. All of them). It also doesn’t help that I like the Marvel Cinematic Universe’s version of Loki. Also not helping re: my ability to write an objective review of this book is the fact that Tom Hiddleston is extremely attractive.

I may have lost a bit of respect for him as a person re: the Great HiddleSwift PR Stunt, but…damn he’s hot. 

He can enter into a PR romance with me any day. I mean, come on:

Right?

So we’ve got the perfect storm of things that I like – an author I enjoy, a fandom in which I’ve been thoroughly entrenched since Iron Man came out in 2008, a gorgeous Englishman portraying a popular, fan-favorite character…Yeah, this is going to be tough. This review really could just be a bunch of nonsense punctuated by Tom Hiddleston gifs.

Wait. Nope. That’s exactly what it is. Damn it.

And I wonder why I’ve failed at being a real writer. Well, that and laziness and a clinically poor attention span. Oh well. That’s what Tumblr is for. I assume. Tumblr! For when you’ve failed at pretty much everything else.

Anyway: LOKI: Where Mischief Lies!

Since this is a young adult novel, we get to deal with adolescent versions of Loki and Thor, which is a pretty long time ago considering that they’re gods and they age very, very slowly. Either way, teen Loki has a best friend/partner in crime named Amora (I see what you did there, Ms. Lee, don’t think I didn’t see what you did just there). Amora is a sorceress in training, and she’s been secretly helping Loki learn magic. Asgardians aren’t big on their princes being sorcerers - they’d rather their princes be golden boy warriors with huge muscles and blonde hair. You know, like Thor. Poor Loki, eternally trapped in Thor’s shadow. 

Things get worse when, at the feast of Gullveig, Odin looks into the Godseye Mirror, which is this a supercool mirror that can show the future. The Godseye Mirror just shows general warnings about Asgard’s enemies and Odin then shares what he sees and tells everyone how they will triumph. You know, the things you do with a future-telling mirror. However, at tonight’s feast, what Odin sees in the Godseye Mirror is so terrible he refuses to speak about it publicly. Loki and Thor, eavesdropping on Odin and his council, learn that the prophecy Odin saw had to do with Loki doing something terrible. Gasp! Of course Loki has to know more. So he and Amora sneak into the vault to try and look into the Godseye Mirror themselves.

Except they accidentally break it. 

Whoops!

Amora takes the fall for the whole scheme, and, as a result, she’s permanently exiled to Midgard, where she will live the rest of her life without magic. Loki is bereft at the loss of his friend, but Frigga, being the best mom ever, takes over Loki’s magical training, Asgardian prince-standards be damned. 

An undetermined amount of time goes by (again, immortal beings, time doesn’t really have much meaning with them) with Loki still, STILL, living stuck in Thor’s shadow. Everybody loves Thor - Thor seems to be able to effortlessly do everything right, while Loki is always having to prove himself. Even when Loki follows all the rules and does everything right, he still manages to fall short of Thor. Plus, there’s still that vague Godseye Mirror prophecy hanging over his head...

When the Norn Stones - the most powerful magic amplifiers in the whole of the Nine Realms - are stolen, Odin tasks Thor with looking for them. It’s a pretty plum assignment, the sort of thing you’d ask a future King to do. Loki, on the other hand, is punted off to Midgard  to help some dumb humans. Not a very kingly assignment, but still, Loki has to do it. He arrives in 19th century London to help the SHARP Society investigate a string of murders that appear to have links to Asgardian magic. Unfortunately, the SHARP society isn’t exactly your 19th century version of SHIELD - the whole society consists of Mrs. S, the elderly widow of the society’s founder, Theo, an engineer with a badly damaged leg, and Gem, a cop who has to keep his association with the society secret or else he’ll lose his job. 

The indignities Loki must put up with just keep getting worse and worse, but still - if he wants to actually impress Odin, he has to complete this assignment. But humans are just the absolute worst. Only, Theo might not be so bad...

As a Marvel Fangirl, I absolutely loved Loki: Where Mischief Lies because of course I did. I do have a few complaints, though: at times the plot moves a little too slowly, and some of the characters, especially those of the SHARP society, seem a little underdeveloped. I wanted more scenes between Theo and Loki, more time for them to develop a rapport. Honestly, I just wanted more in general. This book could’ve been 800 pages and I would’ve been happy to read it. I mean, it’s Loki gallivanting around 19th Century London solving crimes. If you’re a fan MCU’s Loki, then you’ll love the book. If you’re a very serious book reviewer who doesn’t read books for fun, then, well, you might have a tough time of it.  

Still, who knows - the copy I read is an ARC, meaning the text is unfinished. There’s bound to be some changes made to the copy between now and the September release date, so perhaps all my complaining about pacing and underdeveloped characters will be rendered moot. We shall see. In the mean time, 19th Century London + Loki = one very happy fangirl.

RECOMMENDED FOR: Marvel fans, Loki/Tom Hiddleston fans, anyone who enjoys a fun blend of YA Fantasy and Historical Fiction, anyone who can just picture Loki running around 19th century London in a stylish waistcoat...

NOT RECOMMENDED FOR: DC Fans, comic purists, people who dislike Thor and Loki for some reason, 

RELEASE DATE: September 3, 2019

RATING: 4/5

TOTALLY UNBIASED FANGIRL RATING: 500,000,000,000,000,000,000/5

THOR RATING:

LOKI RATING:

RATING FOR ANYONE WHO DOESN’T GET THE TITLE REFERENCE:

[theonyxpath]

Now available for order from our partners at Indie Press Revolution: Beckett’s Jyhad Diary Deluxe Edition!

It’s ever been a loaded word among vampires. Jyhad is in force everywhere from lofty, perfumed Elysium to cloying, smoke-filled blood feasts. Jyhad’s the eternal game played by elders, Methuselahs, and worse — it’s the agenda of beings so utterly beyond humanity, one such as yourself could scarcely understand its movements. 

Luckily for you, you’ve picked up a copy of my diary. With my help you may just take a step on the first rung of understanding. Information worth having is information you must earn through blood, and oh, how I’ve bled for what’s contained within these pages. 

— Beckett 

Beckett’s Jyhad Diary serves as the definitive book of setting and plot for Vampire: The Masquerade, containing 30 chapters spanning different geographical regions, encountering vampires of every clan, profiling obscure and profound segments of the mythology, and providing countless story hooks on every page. 

Masterfully written by the likes of Neall Raemonn Price, Joshua Alan Doetsch, Myranda Sarro, Steffie de Vaan, Malcolm Sheppard, Alan Alexander, Renee Knipe, and Matthew Dawkins, Beckett’s Jyhad Diary is as fascinating to read as to use for your game Chronicles.

Also available for V20: Beckett’s Jyhad Diary V20 Storyteller’s Screen and Vampire: The Masquerade 20th Anniversary Edition Dice! The screen is a sturdy three-panel foldout with pertinent charts and quick-reference information for V20 games. The dice are, made by Q Worshop, are elegant grey-and-black featuring the numbers 1 through 9 in the familiar Vampire title font, and the V20 ankh taking the place of the 10, surrounded by thorned rose vines.

Also available: Changeling: The Dreaming 20th Anniversary Edition Deluxe Edition!

Judge us not by our seemings for we are never what we appear. Come hither, changelings and join the dream-dance, lest the winter come and the Dreaming pass into memory.

Recall your heritage! Let the games begin!

Twenty years ago, White Wolf published Changeling: the Dreaming, the fifth of their promised five game-lines that together comprised the World of Darkness. Seen by some as a lighter, more fantasy-based setting in the modern-day, and by others as the darkest game White Wolfhad yet created, players had to face the question of what happens once creativity and magic fades from their world.

This 20th Anniversary Edition of Changeling: the Dreaming returns to that deceptively bright yet terrifying world and both compiles and completes the concepts of the previous two editions. Led by veteran White Wolf and Onyx Path developer “Blackhat” Matt McFarland, our writing team consists of longtime Changeling creators like Ian Lemke, Jackie Cassada, Nicky Rea, and Peter Woodworth, as well as familiar names such as Holden Shearer, John Snead, Maggie Carrol, Matthew Dawkins, and Krister Michl. One and all are dedicated to making Changeling: the Dreaming Twentieth Anniversary Edition the most playable edition yet – while not losing the wonder, awe, and majesty that Changeling is known for.

A revised and up to date look at the World of Darkness through the eyes of the Kithain – what has happened to the Dreaming in the last 20 years, and what is the state of Glamour and dreams?

Rules for all of the kiths including in 2nd ed, plus fan favorites from other books: selkies, piskies, clurichaun, and both Arcadian and Concordian sidhe.

Rules for the Gallain: The inanimae, the hsien, the Nunnehi, and others!

An overhauled and reimagined system for fae magic, including new Arts and the powerful but dangerous practice of Unleashing!

New full-color beautiful artwork as well as classic Changeling illustrations including remastered full page pieces of the kiths by Tony Diterlizzi.

Also available for Changeling: Changeling: The Dreaming 20th Anniversary Edition Storyteller’s Screen and Changeling: The Dreaming 20th Anniversary Edition Dice! Like the screen above, this is a sturdy three-panel foldout with useful reference information for Changeling Storytellers. The Q Workshop dice display the numbers 1 through 9 (with the signature Changeling luna moth on the 0 face) placed in a stained glass motif.

For more about our partnership with IPR, please see Rich’s recent Monday Meeting Notes.

Kickstarter Update

Our next Kickstarter is going to be Lunars: Fangs at the Gate for Exalted 3rd Edition, coming up on February 12 at 2pm Eastern!

Did you miss one of our previous Kickstarters? The following Kickstarted products are still open for preorders via BackerKit:

Dystopia Rising: Evolution: Dystopia Rising: Evolution rulebook

Scion: Scion 2nd Edition (Origin and Hero)

Trinity Continuum: Trinity Continuum (core rules and Trinity Continuum: Æon)

Exalted: Dragon-Blooded: What Fire Has Wrought

Vampire: The Masquerade: V5 Chicago by Night

Chronicles of Darkness: Chronicles of Darkness: Dark Eras 2

Geist: The Sin-Eaters: Geist: The Sin-Eaters 2nd Edition

Community Spotlight

The following community-created content for Scarred Lands has been added to the Slarecian Vault in the last week (to be updated once DTRPG is back up):

Your product could be here! Have you considered creating your own to sell?

The following community-created content for Realms of Pugmire has been added to Canis Minor in the last week:

Calling: Librarians

Your product could be here! Have you considered creating your own to sell

[mirkwoodshewolf]

Child of Ragnarok; Loki x baby reader

Hey guys well here is another Loki fanfic for all of you out there. This one came as a Wattpad request yet again but after watching the Thor: Ragnarok trailer over 100 times I couldn’t help myself but based the request off of that plus one of my favorite movies “Kubo and the two strings” which I highly recommend watching if you haven’t already. Anyways I hope you all enjoy this request and all the fluffiness I have in store for upcoming fanfics in the next while :) Be weary of swear words.

Taglist:

@evyiione

_____________________________________________________

A child was born with the ultimate magic. Raised right and she would be bring about life and eternal light forever, but raised in the wrong hands and the child’s heart would become as black as night and bring about nothing but fear, despair and death to all that she knew.

The father, Loki knew of his daughter’s magic the moment she was born, he could feel it surging through her but that did not sway him nor treat her like a fragile china doll like Odin did for him. He loved his daughter with all his heart if not even more so.  Her mother died giving birth to such a powerful child and though he grieved for the loss of his wife, he saved himself and vowed that he would do whatever it took to raise his daughter right and keep her on the light.

But it was all too soon when Thor saw right through his façade as Odin and both he and Thor had to search for the real Odin because Thor had an inkling that something bad would soon fall upon Asgard. It was then he knew of a wizard, a sorcerer who could help track the All-father down but he also needed Loki with him because he alone knew of Odin’s condition.

In his room where a whole section was built like a nursery, Loki held his baby girl in his arms singing an ancient Asgardian lullaby Frigga once sang to him when he was a babe.  As he felt her doze off, he then saw Thor standing by the door and whispered as quietly as he could.

“It’s time Loki”. Loki narrowed his eyes at Thor but softened when he looked down at his sleeping angel.  He kissed her head and whispered.

“I love you as the stars shine in the sky” he then gently set her down in her crib as Lady Sif and the Warriors three came to defend the sleeping princess while the two Princes went to retrieve the All-father and restore peace to Asgard.

“We’ll keep an eye on the Princess my Prince, no harm shall come to her” stated Fandral.

“Thank you my friends” said Thor.  The four of them placed their right arm over their chests in a bow then before Loki left, he stopped and said.

“If I do find out that someone or something has laid even one hair on her head, you will all be stripped of your titles and banished into the most horrifying realm that not even Jotunheim can compare too”. 

When the Asgardian gods came to Midgard and sought help from the sorcerer known as Stephen Strange, they all walked the streets of New York hoping to find Odin, but neither of them were aware of who would find them first.

Eventually they did find him but he was almost unrecognizable plus his memory had been erased of who he was or who Thor and Loki were, Stephen offered the mortal All-father a place to rest in the NY Sanctum but before Thor and Loki joined them, Loki felt something.  He felt a dark power nearby.

“What is it Loki?”

“I feel like we are not alone Odinson, I feel a dark power nearby”.

“Who is it?”

“I don’t know”. The two of them soon turned at an alleyway and suddenly they heard the sound of a portal opening behind them. They turned and saw someone coming out from it.  A woman wearing black with hints of green armor, she had long black hair and around her eyes they looked shadowed with death.

“Asgardians. You will soon fall” she said in a haunting voice.  Thor without warning threw his hammer towards her but what struck fear into both their hearts was that this woman actually stopped Mjolnir right in its path.  

She smirked wickedly at Thor’s horrified face then actually crushed his hammer into pieces sending a large amount of lightning everywhere knocking down the two Gods and destroying everything else in its path.

“The end has come, for the child I seek has been born”. And just like that the woman disappeared leaving behind two shocked Asgardians.

Loki’s eyes were horror stricken as he thought back on the woman’s words and knew exactly what she was talking about. Using his magic, he opened a portal to Asgard and Thor exclaimed out.

“Loki! Where are you going!?”

“Don’t you see? She’s after my daughter! She’s found out about her magic! I won’t abandon her for a bastard who never even cared for me! You can do what you want with the All-father but (y/n) needs me!” He then ran into his portal which then disappeared.

When Loki arrived in Asgard, he saw most of the Asgardian army, the best known fighters all lying dead around the palace, he quickly ran towards his room and saw Lady Sif and the warriors three all lying down wounded badly.  Sif groaned and looked up to see Loki standing before her.

“Where did she go!?” sneered Loki.

“She came out of nowhere, ahh—I’m so sorry Loki, we tried. But she’s far stronger than any of us”.

“Not my rage”.  Loki then raced back outside when suddenly he was tangled up in chains and brought down to his knees as a haunting chuckle was heard from above.

“Look at this, I come fishing for a babe and all I reel in as a Frost Giant runt”. Loki glared hatefully at the woman seeing her holding his daughter in her arms as she continued to mock him “how pathetic that this Puny God is what bared such a powerful child”.

“This Puny god will TEAR YOU APART!!!” Loki ripped the chain off him and leaped at the woman with his daggers in hand.  The woman then side-kicked Loki in his ribs sending him skidding across the floor.

“Any man who’s willing to attack a woman with a child in her arms must be such a brute. What do you say little one?” The woman said to (y/n) who only stared back with confusion and tears forming in her eyes.  Painfully Loki sat back up and snarled out.

“Who are you?”

“How quickly they forget, after all it was Asgardians who imprisoned me but it has been a few millennia’s and no one likes to remember a figure of Hel. My name Frost giant is Hela, and with your child I shall bring bout the end of your world for what they have done to me. Asgard is dead”. With that last remark she disappeared as Loki cried out his daughter’s name and just lay there in shock of how he failed to protect his little girl.

Back on Earth, Doctor Strange had just returned cleaning up the mess from the alleyway that Hela destroyed and continuing some research on this woman when a knock was heard at the front door.

When he opened it, Loki stood there but he was surprised to see that the God of Mischief that had once brought an entire alien army to Earth a few years back was now standing before him a broken God, a father who had just lost his child.

“I need your help Doctor” he said.

In the library, Stephen picked up his book and said.

“So you said this woman’s name is Hela and she wishes to bring bout the end of the Gods”.

“She means to start Ragnarok, and my daughter’s magic could help her make it a reality, but first she has to convert her in her realm of Helheim”.

“You do realize killing her won’t be easy because according to you she’s already pissed off that you’re people imprisoned her for over 3000 years”.

“But I did come across something in your vault that could put a stop to her, the Blade of Valor, an Elven weapon made by the Light elves of Álfheimr. It’s said to be so strong, it’s blade is completely unbreakable and with its power it can kill anything even a god”.

“So that’s what that thing is, I always wondered why a random sword was chosen to be a relic. I mean swords can do a lot on their own I just never heard of a one being a relic”.

“Can I have the sword or not!?” Loki demanded.

“Only problem there Loki, the relics choose their wielder, and they will choose you when they know you’re ready. Wong once told me that the last time a person chose a relic early, their powers were drained so badly that they were nothing but dust in the end. I was fortunate that my relic didn’t do that to me, but it does sometimes have anger issues at times”. The collar of his cape slapped Stephen’s cheek making him cry out. “It’s true!” He then turned back to Loki and said, “You sure you wanna do this?”

“I’m not doing it for Asgard, I’m doing it for my daughter”. The two sorcerers then went to the relic vault and there in one of the glass containers stood a mighty sword.  A nice curved blade with a long decorative elvish vine design from the fuller to the rain guard, the grips’ color was brown with golden engravings on it and actually written on the blade itself was in the language of the Light elves that read.

‘Let evil die and the Light endure, for the Blade of Valor shall not deter’.  Loki turned to Strange and Strange opened the case and nodded for Loki to take it. Loki reached out for it and grabbed the grip and took it out of the case.

The words began to glow green like Loki’s magic and he could feel the sword trying to accept him then the light died down and Loki felt the one thing he never had with Mjolnir.

He was worthy.

“Allow me to help you”.

“This doesn’t concern you, you’ll only get yourself killed”.

“Try me Beyoncé”. Loki looked at Strange confused then he continued, “Besides you let this Hela come to my world and I won’t take that lying down so I’m helping whether you like it or not”.

“Fine, but you are to do everything I say, no questions asked, understood?” said Loki as he now had the sword tied to his back.

“I’m not really a follower but I will help your daughter”.

“Then let’s go, Doctor Strange”.  It was then the two men disappeared in green light and were now standing in Helheim.

“So I guess the saying Hell freezes over is true then” stated Strange as Helheim was a frost covered realm instead of the typical fiery pit that movies and TV always make it seem.

“Her palace is ahead, but it won’t be easy to get in without being seen”.

“Leave that to me, I know you just want your daughter so leave the zombies to me, you just find your daughter”.

“Are you sure you’re up for this Strange?”

“Totally, it’s gonna be fun, plus I can brag to Wong how I’m living out Walking Dead and he is not”.  The two of them treaded on through the harsh winter winds until they stood before Hela’s palace.  “So you know where your daughter’s being kept at exactly?”

“She was born with a powerful aura, I’ll be able to track that. I just hope I get to her in time before I lose my baby forever”.

“I’ll buy you as much time as I can, so you better put your magic to good use Trickster”.  Stephen then flew down towards the palace and using his sorcery he caused an explosion of magic to draw out the guards so that they would move away from their posts giving Loki the chance to get inside.

When Loki saw the guards all following Strange, he faded in green light and soon teleported himself from the ridge to the main floor of the palace.  He could hear the sounds of a baby crying and muttered his daughter’s name and took off running towards it.

He turned down a corridor and opened up the main door and there at the center of the room his baby girl still wrapped in her blanket was placed on a transmutation circle that would drain her light magic and turn it into dark magic and with that power, Hela would claim it for herself and bring bout the end of the Gods.

“(Y/n)”. He ran towards his daughter only to be once again wrapped up in chains.  He then saw that his daughter was nothing but an illusion as she vanished into thin air and he was now being lifted into the air as Hela’s voice echoed throughout the room.

“I have crushed being that could fit all nine realms in the palm of their hand,” as Loki was brought right up to Hela (she now has the full badass headdress on) she placed her sword at his neck lifting his head up as she continued, “Fighting you will bring me no honor”.

It was then Loki spinned himself around and used both of his feet to kick Hela in the stomach freeing him from his bounds and landed skillfully on the ground and he snarled as he withdrew the Blade of Valor.

“Imagine how you’re going to feel when you lose!” He then charged at Hela and their two swords collided with each other as the two of them fought.

Using her second weapon The Reaper of Souls, (A/N: basically imagine a Kusarigama with a kama on one end and an iron claw-hand on the other) she shot the iron claw at Loki who managed to block it sending right back to Hela but she took back control of it and spun it around with her sword at her other hand.

“Seems to me you’ve already lost! Your child is now mine” Loki’s eyes widened in horror but then turned to pure hatred as he charged at Hela roaring at her.  As the two continued to battle it out, Hela continued to torment Loki. “You abandoned her when you left her on your quest to save the All-father. You’re no better than when your own Father Laufey abandoned you!” Loki used a wall as leverage as he flew in the air roaring angrily ready to strike down Hela but she suddenly disappeared.

Loki took the sword in hand cautiously looking around as he walked forward and sneered.

“Who’s the coward now you bitch!?” Unaware that she had blended into the shadows but he suddenly caught a sense of her magic and growled and managed to turn around and block Hela from striking her sword on him in the nick of time.

Loki glared at Hela with hateful eyes and she returned with bloodlust wanting to end this fight so that she could get what she wanted. Loki kicked her in the gut and Hela returned the favor with a flying roundhouse sending Loki into a pillar and cracking it in the process.  He slowly got up and took the sword again and charged at Hela.

Now using her reaper chain, she shot the Iron claw at Loki who blocked it with the Blade of Valor but he was shocked to see the claws actually grab the blade and take it out of his grasp sending it flying to the other side of the room.  Loki was defenseless.  Hela sent out the Kama end towards him but Loki vanished into green light.

Hela was baffled when suddenly a chain was wrapped around her throat, Loki had all this time given a clone of himself fighting Hela while he waited for the right moment to sneak attack her.  Using all his strength he swung the chain towards another pillar and Hela slammed face first into it before falling down to the ground.

Loki got on top of her and wound the chain further around her neck and pulled backwards hoping to choke her but one of the points of her headdress spurted out a blade point and slashed Loki across his eye forcing him to release Hela.  He held his eye on pain as Hela levitated into the air with her Reaper weapon out once more as she said.

“It never fails to amaze me how creatures like you fight so hard just to die another day”.

“We creatures have purposes that are worth fighting for”.  Loki released his hand from his eye revealing his new scar that with from the top of his eyebrow straight down to his sharp cheekbone.  He then took notice that just a few feet behind Hela was the Blade embedded into the ground.

“There is nothing in any realm worth anything!” She shot out the iron claw end towards Loki who leaped out of the way, went up the chain before flipping over Hela’s head and reached out his hand for the Blade but he was suddenly the iron claw of Hela’s weapon deeply gauged itself into Loki’s side.  

He cried out in pain as Hela gave her chain a yank pulling Loki further away from the sword until he fell to the ground in pain just barely a foot from the blade. He could feel its powerful magic beginning to drain his life. Weakly Loki crawled like a wounded dog towards the sword as best as he could as Hela stated.

“You have become a nuisance to me Loki of Jotunheim, had you not had your daughter you could’ve defeated me. But love has made you weak!”

“No!” Hela then pulled on the chain bring Loki up towards her but he wielded his sword proudly as he snarled “IT MADE ME STRONGER!!” And with a skillfully swipe with the Blade of Valor, Hela was defeated.

Loki now lay there wounded and his life draining from him.  It was then Strange came in with something in his arms.

“Loki!” He saw the God of Mischief laying there on the ground and ran towards him holding his cloak of Levitation tightly in his arms.  Loki weakly opened his eyes to see Stephen kneeling down beside him.  “What happened?”

“It is finished” he whispered.

“You mean you really—”

“Yes. She is dead, I finished her with the Blade of Valor, but it’s still too late, I’ve lost my daughter forever”.

“Ohhh I wouldn’t say that,” Stephen then revealed from his cloak Loki’s daughter happily babbling.  “I found her just before they were doing the ceremony, not a trace of dark magic is in her. In fact I found a way to expulse it from her forever, she’s safe and sound”.  Loki looked up in shock to see his baby girl alive and with no more trace of dark magic within her.

Suddenly he groaned as his wound was becoming too agonizing and Stephen finally took notice of it.

“Oh God you’re hurt, hold on I can fix—”

“You can’t do anything Strange, no one can”.

“What do you mean?”

“Her weapon, the Reaper of Souls, its magic is irreversible. As we speak my soul is being drained and soon I’ll be gone. There is no hope for me now. I may have been able to fool Thor of my death many times but for my daughter there is no trickery involved. I vowed to always protect her even if it meant dying so that she could live”.  His daughter sensing her father was in pain, reached out to him whimpering with tears in her eyes.  Loki smiled and reached out for her and brought her close and said to her. “My (y/n), my darling baby girl. Do not weep for me, you must be strong now, I want you to promise me that you’ll be strong and be brave in all that you do. Be a better person than your father was”.  (Y/n) babbled sadly as she touched his face with her hands making Loki smile a pained smile.

“Loki—”

“Stephen Strange, I am giving you the most precious thing I have to offer. Please watch over her, keep her safe, no matter what”. Stephen knew he couldn’t save Loki, he was still learning himself and couldn’t risk having his own child watch her own father die in front of her nodded at Loki and vowed.

“I promise Master Loki” calling him that Loki knew that he had been accepted as a brother to Stephen in the ways of sorcery and magic. Loki took in one last breath of life before finally slipping into darkness.

(Y/n) reached out for her father and touched her father’s wound with her hand before she was picked up by Stephen and tears fell down her face as she cried.  He held little (y/n) close to him and turned away trying to hold back his tears when suddenly something happened.

A Light shined through the room and there stood a woman with long blond hair and gentle blue eyes.  She wore a royal blue Asgardian dress with golden armor around her. She walked towards Loki and knelt down beside him and touched his wound and it began to glow.

Once the Light dimmed down, his wound was healed and light came back to his skin as he suddenly gasped in air and panted heavily startling Stephen as he saw the God of Mischief waking up.

“Loki? You alright?”

“I—I saw,” he then turned around and saw the woman smiling down at him.  His eyes widened and he muttered, “Mother”.

She nodded as she smiled lovingly and touched her son’s cheek gingerly.

“But—how is this possible?” Frigga then looked to her granddaughter and Stephen said.

“No it—it can’t be, that’s impossible”.

“But it is, she called my mother’s spirit from Valhalla to heal me, didn’t you?” (Y/n) reached out for her father laughing and gurgling happily.  Loki smiled then Stephen handed Loki back his daughter and he held her tightly as he said, “you saved me baby girl, thank you” Loki kissed his daughter multiple times before turning to his mother’s spirit and just couldn’t find the words to say.

Before he could speak, she placed her hand over his lips and looked at him with a face that said she forgave him.  She then leaned forward and kissed the top portion of where his new scar was then smiled down at her granddaughter and kissed her as well before disappearing and her spirit headed back to Valhalla.

A tear ran down Loki’s face as he finally got to see his mother forgive him after everything he had done and said to her. He smiled down at his daughter and said.

“You truly are a gift from Valhalla my little one”.

[bookswritinghappiness]

Title: The Dark Vault • Series: The Archived (#1-2.5) Author: Victoria Schwab • Number of Pages: 704 • Rating: 4.5/5 Published: August 14, 2018 • Read: November 24, 2018 - May 26, 2019

Goodreads Synopsis: Imagine a place where the dead rest on shelves like books. Each body has a story to tell, a life seen in pictures only Librarians can read. The dead are called Histories, and the vast realm in which they rest is the Archive. Da first brought Mackenzie Bishop here four years ago, when she was twelve years old, frightened but determined to prove herself. Now Da is dead, and Mac has grown into what he once was: a ruthless Keeper, tasked with stopping often violent Histories from waking up and getting out. Because of her job, she lies to the people she loves, and she knows fear for what it is: a useful tool for staying alive. Being a Keeper isn't just dangerous - it's a constant reminder of those Mac has lost, Da's death was hard enough, but now that her little brother is gone too, Mac starts to wonder about the boundary between living and dying, sleeping and waking. In the Archive, the dead must never be disturbed. And yet, someone is deliberately altering Histories, erasing essential chapters. Unless Mac can piece together what remains, the Archive itself may crumble and fall.

My Review: I feel like a broken record right now, but the amount of time it took me to read this book absolutely does not reflect its quality! I’ve been reading multiple books at the same time for quite a while (which I REALLY don’t like doing) and school has been keeping me extremely busy, not to mention that since this is two books in one, it’s twice as long as the books I usually read. I’m honestly shocked that it took me this long to read The Dark Vault considering it’s a Victoria Schwab book, and she’s one of my favorite authors (I have a ticket to her BookCon autographing session on Sunday and I’m so excited). But enough excuses — on to the review!

I love Victoria Schwab’s worldbuilding so much. Seriously, in every single book of hers that I read, I’m always so impressed by the way she creates all of her different fantasy worlds and reveals them to the reader bit by bit, without a huge descriptive info dump. I especially loved seeing the world of the Archive through Mackenzie’s eyes and seeing her start to question its values and ideals. Mackenzie’s relationships with the people in her life (Roland, her parents, her dead brother, Wesley) are so interesting especially as they change, and so essential to the plot of the story. I was so interested in the characters as individuals, too, and I seriously could read whole books about each of the other characters, so needless to say, I loved the short story included at the end of the book that’s told from Wesley’s point of view.

While I really like everything that this book has, there are some things that I wanted more of that aren’t included. I’d love to see some flashbacks of Mackenzie and Ben in addition to the flashbacks of her and Da. I was expecting some kind of drama between Mackenzie and the best friend she moved away from, but there wasn’t any, which was good, but at the same time I would have liked to see more interactions between them and more of their relationship. I feel like she would be the first person Mackenzie would tell the truth to about the Archive. Anyway, I also want to see Mackenzie struggle more with her opinion of the Archive and what happens during after the inevitable rebellion — does it have an effect on Mackenzie’s relationship with Wesley, what happens to Roland and the other Librarians, what role does Mackenzie play in it, does Owen make an appearance…? I think that a lot of this would be answered if Victoria had an opportunity to publish a third book in the series, and I really hope she does have an opportunity to write one in the future because I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!!

Overall, I highly recommend The Dark Vault (or The Archived and The Unbound if you’d like to read them separately), unless you can’t handle not knowing what happens, in which case I will redirect you to any and all of Victoria’s other works. I can’t wait to see her again on Sunday and hear her speak about her work on a panel at BookCon : )

The Dark Vault on Goodreads This Review on Goodreads My Goodreads

[trilliumlavellan]

Writing Prompt: "I'm fine"

“Bells,” Trilly whispered as quietly as she could manage. “What are you doing?”

“You’ll see.”

Trillium winced. Belladonna could not whisper as quietly as she could.  Trepidation crept up her spine. There were times when she truly had no idea how to guess the thoughts within her sister’s mind. Earlier, Bells had lured her to the library with the tantalizing prospect of studying an Antivan tome about the proper distillation of poison. But when they arrived, Dorian was waiting with a mischievous gleam in his eye.

Dorian whisked the sisters to the banister in the center of the library, the one overlooking the rotunda below. Tugging them into a crouch, he proceeded to bob his head toward the sole occupant of the space below them, toward the man who had, quite literally, invaded Trillium’s dreams.

Her heart nearly stopped. This was an impossible situation. Here she was, wedged between two people waiting to pounce on her slightest reaction. This wasn’t a study session, it was a trap. She looked right—Belladonna couldn’t keep the grin off her face. She looked left—Dorian raised an eyebrow suggestively. Somehow, she had been found out. The only escape would be to pretend total ignorance. Luckily, she had a reputation for being naïve in matters like these.

“Why are we spying on Solas?”

“Look at what he’s drawing.”

Trillium was confused. Everyone knew Solas was creating a masterwork on the walls below. He was probably sketching out the latest panel in his fresco. She followed Dorian’s instruction and gazed at the pages on Solas’s desk. She was too high above to be able to decipher the images, so she focused on Solas instead. Ordinarily so guarded and formal, his expression was soft and loving. The corners of his lips turned upward in the slightest of smiles as those elegant fingers of his traveled over the surface of the parchment in long, sensual strokes. Trillium’s breath barely managed to leave her body. Was it possible to be jealous of a piece of paper?

Entranced, she watched him draw for what seemed like a lifetime. Then, a clatter from the Great Hall broke the spell and the quiet. Looking concerned, Solas quickly gathered his papers, hid them under a book, and left to investigate. Belladonna grabbed her hand, tugged, and dragged her down the stairs.

So here they were, sneaking toward Solas’s desk when he could come back at any moment. What on earth was Belladonna thinking?

“Bells,” Trilly whispered again, slightly louder than before. “We’re going to be caught.”

“Don’t worry. Sev’s keeping him distracted.”

Panic invaded Trillium’s voice. “You brought the twins into this?” Just how elaborate was this trap?

“Oh, hush,” Bells had reached the corner of the desk, her hand about to lift the book concealing the papers Solas had hidden so hastily. “Don’t you want to see what he was drawing?”

She did, desperately, long to know what subject would prompt Solas to sketch with such pleasure, but Trilly also knew how much he respected his privacy. If she had a secret, she wouldn’t want him to sneak into her room to steal it.

“Well, I do. I did not realize our dear Solas knew how to smile.” While she had been dithering, Dorian had made his way down the stairs. With a single stroke, he plucked the papers from the desk and gazed upon the images imprinted on them. His eyes lit with unholy glee, as if he had just heard the juiciest gossip in two years’ time. “My, my, my,” Amusement laced his voice as he turned toward Trillium. “What have you been hiding?”

Belladonna rushed to his side. She took one look at Solas’s drawings and gasped, “I knew it!”

And there they were again—the two of them looking at her as if she were a dish to be devoured at a moment’s notice.

Wordlessly, Dorian stretched out his hand, offering the drawings to her. Trillium took a deep breath. She took two steps forward and plucked them from his fingers. They’d made those drawings impossible to resist. Inwardly, she cursed Dorian’s satisfied smirk as she glanced downward.

Her heart stopped. And then, it started to beat at a rate three times its usual speed.

Every single sketch was of her.

There were at least twenty. Here, she was on watch in the Hinterlands. There, she was sparring on the grounds of Skyhold, mixing poison in her lab, smiling back from atop her newly acquired hart, diligently tending to a sprout in the garden, trudging through snow, sleeping in her hammock, and in a host of other stolen moments. They were all every day, ordinary things, but somehow he had made her look extraordinary. Graceful he had called her. No, he hadn’t called her graceful—he had declared it. Here, his feelings were without doubt. The lines of her body were shapely and evocative. The expressions on her face were alight with beauty. He had made her caring, vulnerable, fierce, and most surprisingly, happy. She blushed to think of the lingering looks she had caught out of the corner of her eye. He had been caressing her with his eyes, committing each moment into memory to recreate at leisure in the secrecy of night. These were the drawings of a man in love. For surely, no one else could render her with such intimacy. She shuddered, remembering how he had stroked the pages as he drew. Her mind wandered, wondering what the touch of those fingers would feel like on her skin.

“Trilly?” Belladonna’s voice broke the spell she had been under. “Didn’t you know?”

Had she known? Unconsciously, her fingers traced the bottom of her lip. That kiss. It had made her heart flutter like a flower in the wind. Was that love?

Belladonna gasped. The sound brought Trillium to her senses. She had fallen into their trap.

“He kissed you! He kissed you and you didn’t tell me?”

Trillium blushed. She felt as if her entire face was on fire. Very carefully, she returned Solas’s drawings to their place on his desk, opened her mouth as if to answer Belladonna, and then turned on her heel and ran as fast as her feet could carry her in the opposite direction.

The sound of Dorian’s laughter chased her up the stairs as Bells cried out, “You’re not getting away that easily! I need details, Trillium!”

Trillium flew. Her feet traveled to the speed of her pounding heart. She was as light as a feather, she ran as if she had wings. Up the stairs, through the library, around the corner of the upper hall, past Vivienne, and down the other side. She ran without care, trusting her body to take her along the path she needed to travel. As she rounded a corner, her flight came to an abrupt halt when she clattered into someone, sending them both to the ground.

Strong hands clasped her shoulders, gently guiding them up from the floor of the Great Hall. “Lethallan? Are you all right?”

Sweet Sylaise. It was Solas. And there, on either side of him, were the twins. As usual, Seven was smirking about something. Soren, though, bore a slight look of disapproval. Trilly would have to worry about that later— for now, Solas dominated her view. In one movement, he rose from the jumbled position she had knocked him into. Concern wrinkled his brow as he held out his hand for Trillium to take. She blushed to see his fingers so soon after she had imagined them travelling the length of her body. She couldn’t quite meet his eye as she held onto his hand and allowed him to assist her up. His fingers tightened around hers. “Trillium?”

Oh yes. He had asked her something, hadn’t he? She had already forgotten how she was supposed to reply. She was lost in a realm of revelation. As she finally brought herself to meet his gaze, her mind swirled with one thought only. He loves me. He loves me. He loves me! Unbidden, the corners of her lips curled into a foolish grin. She couldn’t keep herself from beaming like an idiot.

“Are you well?”

Goodness, she must look like a loon. Before she could reply properly, the sound of Belladonna on the stairs behind her brought her to her senses. “I’m fine,” she rushed to say. “But I have to hide from Bells. It’s hard to explain.” With that, she released his hand and took off toward the end of the hall. If she hurried, she might trick Bells into thinking she was heading to climb her favorite tree in the garden.

As her hand reached the handle, Trillium heard a terrible racket. Belladonna had just done the exact same thing she had moments ago. She collided with Solas, sending them both sprawling. Yet this time, Solas was not the first to rise. Bella jumped straight up and pointed in his face. “You!” She exclaimed breathlessly. “You kissed my sister!”

“You kissed our sister?” The twins pounced on Bella’s words. In unison, they look on a frightening aspect. Each took one of Solas’s arms and pulled him to his feet. Creators! What were they going to do to him?

Trillium thought about trying to rescue him, but Bells was hurtling toward her. If she didn’t move now, she would be caught. Changing tactics, she sent an apologetic look his way and ran toward Josie’s office. Once there, she sped down to the vaults, confident she’d find the perfect place to hide. As she settled into the shadows, she could still hear Belladonna’s calling after her for details.

For the second time, Trillium’s fingers found their way to tracing her lip. It really was an unforgettable kiss.

[mrmichaelchadler]

Thumbnails 11/2/18

Thumbnails is a roundup of brief excerpts to introduce you to articles from other websites that we found interesting and exciting. We provide links to the original sources for you to read in their entirety.—Chaz Ebert

1. 

"CIFF 2018: 'The Hate U Give' and 'Widows' on the Red Carpet": My interviews with filmmakers Steve McQueen and George Tillman Jr., author Gillian Flynn and actors Viola Davis, Michelle Rodriguez and Amandla Stenberg at the Chicago International Film Festival, published at Indie Outlook.

“There’s no question Tillman Jr.’s film would make an essential double bill with Carlos López Estrada’s ‘Blindspotting,’ another powerful illustration of modern-day prejudice amplified shamelessly by our president. ‘What I want to illuminate for audiences is the importance of having empathy instead of sympathy, of having understanding as well as the ability to listen to each another,’ Tillman Jr. told me. ‘We must have the tough conversations provoked by this film, and I’m very excited for audiences to take it all in.’ Among the most potent truths illuminated by ‘The Hate U Give’ is the tendency for white people to mistake ‘color blindness’ as a form of acceptance. Having been open about her own sexuality in recent years, Stenberg told me that the importance of acknowledging one’s identity extends far beyond the realm of race. ‘Whether it’s your blackness, your gayness, your trans-ness or whatever it is, I think it is always so important to acknowledge the components of self that make us us,’ stressed Stenberg. ‘The premise of ‘I don’t see color’ is one that rests upon the idea that we live in a post-racial or post-identity society, which is not true. When we relate to one another and see, hear and regard each other, I think it’s really important to be inclusive of all the different facets of self that contribute to one’s own experience. You have to make sure that when you are seeing someone, you are seeing them not despite of who they are, but including and because of who they are.’”

2. 

"The Many Faces of Women Who Identify as Witches": Including Deborah Kampmeier, the exceptional filmmaker pictured above, in an article by The New Yorker's Naomi Fry. Catch the exhibit at NYC's ClampArt before it closes on November 24th.

“In her portrait series ‘Major Arcana: Witches in America,’ which will be shown at the ClampArt gallery, in Chelsea, beginning October 4th, the photographer Frances F. Denny seeks to explore the figure of the contemporary witch beyond the cultural chestnuts that have shrouded and obscured it. In the course of the past two years, Denny, who holds an M.F.A. in photography from the Rhode Island School of Design (where I taught her for a semester a number of years ago), has travelled in California, Louisiana, and along the East Coast, taking the portraits of dozens of women who identify as witches. Her subjects are of diverse age, social class, and ethnicity, and practice a range of rituals, often drawing on ‘mysticism, engagement with the occult, politically oriented activism, polytheism, ritualized ‘spell-work’ and plant-based healing,’ according to Denny’s exhibition notes. Among them are ‘self-proclaimed green witches, white witches, kitchen witches, hedge witches, and sex witches.’ The series as a whole aims to avoid easy formulas and, instead, to exhibit the heterogeneity and individuality of modern-day witches, Denny told me recently, adding, ‘I’m not pinning these women down.’”

3.

"Fare Thee Well, Filmstruck": Our critic Monica Castillo eulogizes the irreplaceable streaming service in her latest Tiny Letter newsletter, which you can sign up for here.

“I don't need to tell you the news has been bad lately. But to lose a source of comfort in these trying times? It feels especially cruel, almost personally so. Last week, Time Warner pulled the plug on FilmStruck, the streaming service that offered treasures from the TCM vault and the Criterion Collection. As far as I know, there is no other streaming service that takes programming and extras so seriously. FilmStruck started the season after I began at The New York Times. It was exciting news to cover, and I felt especially attached to FilmStruck because of the timing. I picked movies from its collections after work to de-stress. Later, I came up with ideas on how to cover some new discovery I just HAD to write about. I cried my way through the early films of David Lean during a few rough patches, and I threw on old favorites like the movies of Peter O'Toole while doing chores to keep me company. FilmStruck proved the streaming world wasn't all bad news for classic movie fans, but that it could be a curated resource useful to diehard cinephiles and newcomers alike.”

4. 

"The Halloween Tree": Andrea Thompson revisits the 1993 animated gem at The Young Folks.

“Yes, Halloween has lasted, but everything mentioned above is mere window dressing. What has kept this holiday going is one of the universal truths of humanity which unites us all, and that is our fascination with fear and the individual horrors that shake us to our core. Few movies understand this, but the Emmy-winning 1993 TV movie ‘The Halloween Tree’ does. I discovered this little gem as a kid because I had the childhood most writers have, the kind with a nose fully inserted in a book. And the author of many such books was one of the great masters of sci-fi himself, Ray Bradbury, the author of the novel of the same name, as well as other books such as The Martian Chronicles, The Illustrated Man, and Fahrenheit 451. For the film adaptation, Bradbury actually penned the screenplay and serves as narrator, which means much of his poetic prose is preserved. The movie takes place on Halloween Night, and follows four preteen kids, Jenny, Ralph, Tom, and Wally, all costumed up as a witch, a mummy, a skeleton, and a monster respectively, and eager to join their best friend Pip. As ‘The Halloween Tree’ puts it, ‘Some say that on the day he was born, all the soda pop bottles in the world fizzed over. Pipkin, who could yell louder, sing better, and eat more popcorn. Pip, the greatest boy who ever lived.’”

5. 

"'Bohemian Rhapsody': A Disservice to Freddie Mercury": Solzy at the Movies critic Danielle Solzman eloquently explains why the hotly anticipated biopic is a missed opportunity. 

“While the band’s popularity is the large focus of the film, it’s hard to discuss Freddie Mercury without knowing what we know about his sexuality. There were the rumors in the tabloids during the band’s heyday. The film doesn’t ignore it per se. There’s a montage of clips where Freddie and personal manager Paul Prenter walking into gay clubs. Even though we see him clearly hitting on guys, there’s not much outside of the relationship with Paul and even Jim Hutton (Aaron McCusker). This is it. Nothing to say of Freddie’s relationship with radio DJ Kenny Everett (Dickie Beau). There’s not even any sex scenes between them! I liken it to social media in that they’re only showing us what they want us to see. The biggest worry obviously has come true. It really does a disservice to the singer. When Freddie receives his AIDS diagnosis, the moment is not as emotional as it could be. This is a serious disease that killed many people. It led to his passing at the age of 45 years old on November 24, 1991. Here it is, the film misses an opportunity to have a bigger focus on his battle with the disease. To make matters worse, Freddie was diagnosed two years AFTER the Live Aid performance and yet as they rehearse for the gig, he opens up about his battle with AIDS! If you’re going to tell the story, tell it the right way.”

Image of the Day

Chicago's indispensable "cine-club," Filmfront, 1740 W. 18th St., is celebrating its first three-and-a-half years of free film and education programming with a fundraising party on Saturday, November 3rd. For more information on the event, visit Filmfront's official Facebook page. You can make a donation here and sign up for its monthly newsletter here. Also be sure to check out my article on Filmfront from 2016. Poster courtesy of Jacob Lindgren.

Video of the Day

The streaming platform Kanopy recently teamed up with the Goethe-Institut to showcase 48 acclaimed German features on its streaming platform. View the complete list here.

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