#also vic is really bad at making food so actually tries to make the food in the wav and burns the meal lol

[flowerbarrel-art]

IM ALIVE- Anywayyy i got this in my mind: How would everyone (The stick figures plus Chosen and Dark etc) react if they eat a flaming hot pepper?

Red - Tentatively eats a bit but discovers he likes it and eats the whole thing. He decides he’d like it better using it in cooking, thinking it might taste even better cooked with other food. Doesn’t need to drink milk but drinks some because Blue is worried. Orange - Eats the whole pepper and likes it a lot and eats the peppers Chosen and Dark didn’t eat. He starts to draw himself a pepper but Purple says he’ll buy him some more when he goes to the store.

Yellow - Likes his pepper and eats half of it before he starts to feel nauseated and dizzy. Drinks some milk but has to lie down. He feels better pretty quickly but decides to never eat spicy food again even if he’d like it.

Green - Loves his pepper and eats it quickly. Has a strong stomach so he doesn’t get sick, but he drinks some milk on a worried Blue’s insistence anyway.

Blue - Mostly likes sweet things and peppers that aren’t spicy so he isn’t a fan. He takes a bite and gives up, then drinks some milk and eats some cake. Red eats the rest of his pepper, to Blue’s dismay.

Purple - Isn’t a fan of spicy but likes non-spicy peppers alright so he eats it for a snack. He starts coughing and has to drink some milk but decides it wasn’t so bad. He also decides he would only eat a spicy pepper in the future if he was really hungry.

Chosen - He’s only used to eating letters in plain fonts, which are pretty bland unlike fancier fonts, so he doesn’t like flavors that are too sweet or too spicy. He’d sniff the pepper and not even bite it, the smell making him nauseated. He could handle the spiciness if he just ate one, but he wouldn’t be happy about it. He’d drink a lot of milk and try to eat foods to get the pepper taste out of his mouth.

Pre-Showdown Dark - Dark’s also not used to strong flavors so he doesn’t like the pepper’s smell much either, but he eats half of it out of curiosity before deciding he doesn’t like it. He gets a stomach ache and swears off spicy food, sticking to letters. Sometimes he and Chosen ate actual food when they could steal it but mostly ate letters from the websites they visited.

Reconfigured Dark - Dark doesn’t like the smell of peppers either but he’s curious and tries to bite it, but Chosen takes the pepper away and gives him some letters, knowing he’d get a stomach ache.

Vic - Doesn’t know why he got a pepper since ghosts can’t eat but he appreciates being invited to the spicy food contest. He gives his pepper to Red (who gives it to Green, since two peppers was enough for Red, who does like them better cooked).

King - He doesn’t like spicy food so he puts it in the Color Gang’s fridge so one of them can eat it later. He didn’t want to give it to Green, Red or Orange since they’d eaten too many peppers already and he didn’t believe they could eat that many and not get sick.

Gold - Loves spicy food but King didn’t let him eat a lot of it, worrying it wasn’t good for him. Gold could eat spicy food on special occasions, like holidays and birthdays and when he and King got corn dogs. Gold always got his corn dog with spicy mustard. Gold can’t eat his pepper since he’s a ghost so he puts his pepper in the Color Gang’s fridge.

[3desiderium3]

For your love

chapter five - On my own

[ series masterlist ]

previous chapter | next chapter

pairings : reader x damiano david

story summary : damiano and reader are in very loving relationship that sometimes almost too quickly becomes too toxic for anyone likings

chapter warning (s) : this is sad i made myself sad

" It was a pretty rough night not gonna lie .. She barely managed to fall asleep around 8 am . I woke up a few times to check upon her cause she had her nose clogged from all that crying . "

Victoria said over phone to Thomas .

It was around one in the noon . She was frying some eggs and vegetables for her and Y/N to eat .

" How did it went over there ? " "Jesus I wish I knew honestly . "

Thomas admitted sighing .

" When he came here last night he was crying . Like really hard . It took him 30 minutes to calm down and tell me what he did .. " " And ? " " I tried punching him in the face but I ended up hurting my hand more . " Vic chuckled upon the thought of Thomas hitting someone , especially Damiano .

" And I don't know he just continued to cry and smoke cigs . I swear to Jesus he smoked like whole 3 packs in one night . I am not sure when he fell asleep or if he did . But there was not much talking here trust me . "

Both of them went silent . Not being able to choose one side . Both Y/N and Damiano where their long known friends and dear people in general .

" Y/N is more than my best friend . She is my family . I would do anything that I can to keep her safe , just like with you . That's why I am feeling so guilty upon meeting her with Damiano. "

" Hon' it was not your fault remember ? " The other line was silent .

" Have you ever wondered how it would look like if they didn't end up together ? "

" Yeah .. I mean maybe .. You know I did often when I found myself in between their arguments . "

" Pft please , they where soft near you comparing to their usual . "

Thomas lighted up his cigarette , the sound of him taking a drag was pretty clear .

" I almost left the band cause of them remember ? At that period Damiano and I had lots of small fights and arguments . "

Vic turned off the stove placing the food in plates skillfully.

" Hold up I need to give Y/N breakfast . " " Aight I'm waitin' . "

" Babes are you awake ? " The blond girl called out for her friend . Y/N was laying on her side of the bed , all the sheets and pillows where thrown in the corner of the room . She didn't wanted anything that smelled like Damiano near her . Instead she slept on bare mattress , Victoria's traveling pillow and she covered herself with the blanket from living room .

" I am not hungry yet , can you just please leave the plate here ? "

" Sure I'll be downstairs . Just call . "

No respond , she just closed the door behind her after glancing at Y/N last time .

Vic was cleaning the stinky apartment whole morning , it was not bothering her in fact . She knew Y/N would do the same for her .

" Tom you there ? " She cooed once her phone was in her grasp again . " Yeah yeah I was talking to Damiano . " " Is he alright ? " " I am not sure really . I think not obviously , but now after this I am not expecting anything normal from him ever again . " " Oh come on it was a - " " If you just dare to finish the sentence I will kill you . How can that be an accident ?? Rape is not an accident ! He was fully aware Victoria !! " " Pshh be quite you idiot ! " She tried hushing her friend after turning around herself paranoid like someone overheard their conversation .

" He is showering now don't worry . We should not be taking sides on this one but Vic .. He is not good for her ... Neither is she for him .. This is lasting for 3 years .. Remember ? "

" Don't fucking remind me . "

Silence . Both of them trying to understand the policy of their friends relationship .

" He threatened to kill himself so many times if she leaves him .. "

" She was so heartbroken each time that she was the one actually considering suicide . "

" I remember one time they had some huge fight as always and she came to my house in like 3 am crying and talking some nonsenses . "

" They never had a filter , especially around us , sometimes it gets just too tiring ya know ? "

" They made me and Ethan cry so many times Jesus Vic you have the biggest nerve here . " Her friend admitted with chuckle.

" Should we like ... talk to them each day and convince them to break up ? "

Deadly silence .

One was sure . Y/N and Damiano shouldn't ever be together again .

" Are we bad friends for doing this ? " " Pft please , we are doing service to everyone . "

" I am so confused and so worried for Y/N , I will talk to Damiano later and then call you to see if something improved and to update you . How is Y/N feeling now ? "

" Not so good bro , I think she is considering that breakup as well . Everything is still so confusing and not in order . "

" Alright Vic , gonna call later , bye love you . "

" Love you too bye . "

* meanwhile in Thomas house *

Thomas hanged up his half hour long conversation with Victoria . He rubbed his eyes hardly throwing the cellphone on the kitchen table where he was standing smoking .

To be honest he was also crying with Damiano last night . He couldn't imagine the amount of pain Y/N was suffering . His still pulsing bruised hand started to feel a bit better . He regretted only hitting Damiano , but they all knew he was the weakest out of all boys in the group .

Damiano was laying in his bed dressed in his chlotes fresh out of shower.

Crying again .

It was slowly starting to make Thomas mad .

' Why didn't he cry last night when he abused her? '

" Oi , whats the matter now ? Why are you crying again ? Cause you are an asshole or complete idiot ? " " Thomas shut the fuck up . I am not capable of having that conversation . " Damiano's voice was raspy and cracked .

" Well we are gonna have this conversation , in fact right now . Where where your tears last night when you raped her ? " " It wasn't ra -" " It was ! You fucked her without her consent ! What the fuck where you thinking ! "

" I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING ! "

He stood up from the bed crying his bottom lip shaking .

" I DON'T FUCKING KNOW ! I WAS MAD AT HER ! MICHAEL WAS THERE ! I HAD THE WORST SCENARIOS RUNNING THROUGH MY HEAD I GOT SCARED ! "

Thomas was in slight shock . Was Damiano really that dumb ?

" Are you serious ? I can't actually believe how selfish and egoistic you are . You raped my best friend because you got mad at her that her ex was there ? "

This was actually the first time in 3 years someones words affected Damiano about his behavior towards Y/N . He sat back on the bed holding his head in his hands .

" I took you in cause I care about you . You are my friend . But I will never forgive you this . You can stay here as much as you want but don't expect any special treatment from me . "

" Should I call her ? I must apologize . "

Thomas snorted .

" No . You must not apologize , you must beg her on your knees to forgive you . You must beg her to even look at you . I know I wouldn't if I was her . No matter what you do she will love you forever and that is the problem . "

Damiano was highly affected by his friends words. In his mind he was only picturing whimpering Y/N whose head he was holding down with his hand , her tears where soaked up on that backseat .

'I will rather die than look her in the eyes again.'

* meanwhile in Y/N's house *

" Are you sure I am not bothering ? I can always ask Thomas to stay with him ? " Y/N asked Victoria while both of them where packing some of Y/N's stuff in the suitcase .

" Yeah absolutely , we are going to spend some quality time healing and having fun . "

Y/N made her final decision , she was going to break up with Damiano this time for real .

She didn't have that much of her stuff , all the clothes , jewelry , letters , poems and all the other gifts she received from Damiano she placed in on huge box and left it on the center of their bed .

" Can I tell Thomas you are staying with me ? "

"Yes but alarm him not to tell Damiano .. I do not wanna hear a word from him . "

Vic simply nodded and in a less than an hour they where all packed leaving the past behind .

* three weeks later *

Things where only worse for our lovers .

Damiano heard no word from Y/N and neither did she from him .

She was expecting it to be honest .

Everyday was same as the other . Too long , too cold and filled with cigarette smoke .

All Y/N did was sometimes leave her room when she didn't wanted to offend Vic after putting effort into preparing the meal , she would listen to whatever record Victoria had , smoke all the cigarettes till she vomited , drink vodka away from her roommates sight and cry herself everyday regretting her whole relationship .

' He never fucking loved me .. I cheated on Michael with him just so he could fuck me over .. He never loved me .. He was just obsessed and he wanted me in his possession '

The fact Damiano didn't try reaching her was painful , it was providing sharp stings in her chest and it gave her headaches .

She saw him in every song , he was always on her mind . She wished she could delete all the memories and feelings just like she deleted the pictures . . .

Damiano was not much different than her .

He was also crying a lot , smoking a lot , not drinking but overthinking . He didn't knew Y/N moved out .. No one understood why it took him 3 weeks to try and reach her .

He didn't understood either .

He was trying to come up with the perfect apologize . He wanted to show her he was willing to do better . Willing to change . To prove her he was ready to change . He was sure that Y/N wouldn't return his calls . She understood her . He expected her to be mad and stubborn she had every reason to be .

Thomas was barely speaking to him . Only some formalities . Måneskin was put on hold their rehearsals , Vic and Thomas being very strict in their communication with Damiano while Ethan was very confused and unsure of what is going on .

Damianos mom and Y/N's parents also weren't included in the situation .

The day he planned on returning home , so sure that he would be greeted by her embrace , came .

He shaved his face for the first time in 3 weeks , he changed his underwear for the first time in 3 weeks , he wore simple suit and he drove all the way into the depths of the town to buy the most glorious flowers that his Y/N loved .

He wasn't planning on just winning her over with some flowers and gifts , or the dialog he practiced in his head and in front of his mirror .

Upon reaching the yard of their house he frowned . There was something different . Something wrong . .

He was walking slowly , looking all around himself , gripping the bouquet of flowers in his sweaty palm .

He stood in front of the door .

It was wrong . Something was wrong .

His mind scream . He hoped he was very paranoid once again .

His hand rose up to ring the door bell . He was nervous and afraid .

You are being worried for no reason .

He kept reasurinf himself.

So he rang .

Once

Twice

Four times . Four long times .

No one opened .

Was she home ? After all he came unannounced . Maybe she is sleeping ?

" Y/N! Y/N it's me ! Please open the door ! "

He was starting to sweat .

He searched with his shaking hands through his pocket to find the house keys . He unlocked the door . The house was empty and cold .

It was not smelling like her . Cause there was no one , she wasn't home . Not for an hour , not for the day , not here in a while .

He kept calling for her . " Y/N ! " He dropped the keys and flowers on the kitchen table .

He started roaming the house in panic . Even trying to sense some sort of smell . He was afraid she killed herself so his nose searched for the rotting corpse smell.

Every bad scenarios possible went through his head .

He ran towards their room . Empty .

Even their pets weren't there . She was gone .

Y/N left him . For real this time . For good .

He started to breath heavily . Tears forming in his eyes . The big box on their bed .

Inside of it all his gifts to her . All his clothes she loved wearing . He took one hoodie she often every time she was cleaning . He placed it under his nose . It still held her scent . Her ghost was there , in the shape of the memories one cardboard box held .

He was crying , repeating her name , calling it out . Kissing her dresses and watering them with tears .

He was on his own . There was no one he wanted more than her . He realized what he had once he lost it . He was alone for the first time .

taglist : @ella-nordstrm3 , @urskaa , @lovelysaltyland , @littleachaos , @whoreforhenrycavill , @13journals , @onceuponparrilla , @21nell , @davedace101 , @vainbimbo , @aliyeaz , @vandafabryova , @miriampraez , @foggyhottubcandy , @daringovangel , @inr89

[frostedfaves]

Delicate

Masterlist

Pairing: Rosa Diaz x fem!reader

Summary: Rosa works a murder case to prove your innocence, inspired by this

Warnings: mentions of murder, infidelity, poorly written casework

A/N: I have only one wish: feedback on this bit of chaos here.

-

At this point in Rosa’s life, there were only three things that brought her memorable pain.

The first was being sent to juvie after snapping under the weight of her parents' expectations.

The second was being released from juvie and realizing the two people who’d played a part in her downfall no longer gave a shit about what happened to her.

The third was seeing you, sitting beside Boyle’s desk in handcuffs.

Of course, she didn’t let anyone see this as she attempted to make her way to her own desk undetected, but you wouldn’t--couldn’t--let her think you were a criminal.

“Rosa--”

“Detective Diaz,” she growled as she walked past with her head held high, surprising herself by restraining from hurting you when you grabbed a fistful of her jacket. “Let me go--”

“I was framed!” you cried out with tears filling your eyes as you raised them to meet hers. “Please. I know you don’t have to believe me, but I’m begging you. I’m the same person you’ve spoken to all these nights. I’ll tell you everything, just...please.”

Her stance was rigid as her mind focused on your fearful expression and the desperate way you clung to her, as if you knew the moment you let go, everything you’d had the last few months was over. Realizing everyone’s eyes were on the two of you as you stared each other down, she roughly pulled herself away to walk over to her desk and deposit her bag and helmet. Your hands dropped into your lap in defeat, only to rise again when Rosa pulled you to your feet by the piece of metal holding your wrists together and led you into an interrogation room.

“Talk,” she ordered once the door was closed and you were seated at the table.

“Early this morning, they found the body of one of the supervisors at my job. Apparently he was killed last night and one of my coworkers pointed the blame toward me, saying that I wanted his position and tried to force him to retire early.”

“You were with me last night. I mean, unless you killed the guy after our call.” She met your widened eyes and sighed. “Sorry.”

“I just don’t know what to do. I know it probably looks bad because I actually am up for a promotion, I had a meeting about it a few days ago. But I’d never kill anyone! I swear I wouldn’t, and I really hope that--”

“I believe you.” She slipped into the chair across from you and squeezed your hands briefly before pulling away again. “And not just because I want to believe that I’m not falling for some power-hungry murderer, but because I trust you not to lie to me.”

A soft smile formed on your lips but a knock sounded at the door before you could respond. You watched her stand and approach the door again to open it, growing nervous again when you saw one of the detectives that arrested you. 

“Holt’s out today, so Sarge is running the briefing and he needs you there too. It’s about this case.”

“Fine.” She faced you again with her hand still holding the door open. “I’ll be back. Just breathe.”

Rosa followed Charles out of the room and down to the briefing room, cutting off any questions he began to ask with a sharp “no”. They were the last to arrive, everyone else seated and looking at Terry standing in front of a board holding some of the case details.

“I’m putting myself on this case,” she announced before anyone else could speak as she approached the board to read over everything.

“Don’t you think you’re too close to this, Rosa?” Charles questioned carefully, yelping at the expression she offered him in response. “I meant to say ‘welcome to the team’!”

“Boyle’s right, Diaz,” Terry spoke up next as she turned away from the board. “What was that in the bullpen?”

“Innocent until proven guilty.” She walked over to sit on one of the tables in front. “Go on.”

“Alright.” He looked down at the notes he’d obtained before entering the room. “So according to the medical examiner, the time of death is set around 9:17pm last night--”

“Y/N didn’t do it,” Rosa quickly interjected. “A camera in the lobby of her building will verify her entering a few minutes before then, and she doesn’t leave after that.”

“Rosa, I know you don’t want your friend to get in trouble, but this--”

“I was with her.” She took a deep breath to prepare herself for not only spilling the secret of her unconfirmed relationship, but to essentially come out as bisexual for the first time ever. “We were in the park together with our dogs and I walked her home after. I know it was 9:15 when we got there because the huge clock in her lobby said 10:15, and it’s been an hour ahead since Daylight Savings Time. I was at her door for a few minutes and when I was leaving, the clock said 10:20.”

“So how do you know she didn’t leave after that?” Jake questioned, causing her to sigh again.

“Because I’m a few blocks away from her and she Facetimed me when I sent her a text telling her I was home. She fell asleep on the phone.”

“Oh damn. You’re in love, girl,” Gina commented, a grin forming when all Rosa did was roll her eyes in response. 

“Okay so she has an alibi, but we also have to rule out the possibility that she had an accomplice.” Terry sighed when Rosa gave him a threatening look. “Look, I want to believe she’s innocent too--”

“Then believe it.”

“--but we have to consider everything, Diaz. It looks pretty suspicious that the last person to see our victim alive also had a reason to want him gone.”

“How do you know she was the last to see him alive?” Rosa took the piece of paper Amy held out to her holding a witness statement, forcing herself not to overreact when she read that Y/N had been spotted talking to her supervisor next to his car. “This means nothing. Check into the person that gave this statement.”

“Rosa--”

“How do we even know she was the last person he saw? And that the person who ‘witnessed’ this didn’t just follow the vic home and kill him just to frame her? What, because of some camera footage and he said, she said?” Barely a moment of silence passed before Rosa spoke again. “Exactly. Santiago and Boyle, meet me downstairs. I’m driving.”

She dropped the witness statement on the table in front of Amy and stormed out, grabbing the keys to her squad car on her way back to the interrogation room you were waiting in. Your eyes snapped up from your hands when the door opened, relaxing slightly as Rosa entered the room.

“I’m going to be out for a bit trying to investigate more of the people involved, but you’ll be okay here.” She hesitated for a moment before approaching your side and leaning down to kiss you for the second time in 12 hours. “I love you.”

She was back out the door as quickly as she arrived.

-

Waiting to find out if you’d be charged with a murder you didn’t commit was hard. Being transitioned from the quiet calm of the interrogation room to the holding cell adjoining the chaotic bullpen was hard too, but at least your hands weren’t chained together anymore. You sat in the farthest corner and counted the minutes until they seemed to all blend together, and all you could focus on was the lingering feeling of warmth caused by Rosa’s lips on yours and her confession.

Having given up on your counting long ago, you weren’t sure how much time had passed when the door to the holding cell opened again. You were delighted to see Rosa again, but your hopeful expression shifted to confusion when you saw who she was leading in.

“Mrs. Fenderson?”

“Hi, Y/N.” 

The woman spoke softly without meeting your eyes, moving to sit on a nearby bench when Rosa unlocked her cuffs. You eyed her curiously as Rosa gently grabbed your wrist and led you out of the cell, making sure it locked before bringing you over to her desk.

“Um, why is my supervisor’s wife--”

“She did it,” she told you as the two of you sat down. “Well, she had some help.”

You followed the direction she nodded in with your eyes, which widened when you saw a couple officers leading in the one person that accused you of being involved with everything. You watched as they led him to the holding cell too, only turning away when Rosa placed her hand over one of yours.

“How did you…? What?!” you asked, unable to fight off a bit of a smile when Rosa snorted. 

“Mrs. Fenderson recently signed up her husband for a pretty hefty life insurance policy, and it didn’t take long to find out those two were boning. I got her to confess to everything while they tracked down her lover, who used the fact that you were up for the same promotion he wanted as a chance to frame you.”

“That’s so fucking crazy,” you responded in a breathless tone as you attempted to wrap your head around the situation for a second, giving up and bringing your free hand to rest on top of hers. “Thank you.”

“Innocent until proven guilty.” She shrugged nonchalantly as she stood, pulling you to your feet as well before you released her hand. “Anyway, it’s super late now and I know you haven’t eaten anything so let’s go.”

“Fine, but I’m paying,” you insisted as the two of you headed toward the elevator, laughing a bit as you remembered something. “As long as we can stop by my apartment first. They don’t exactly let you bring your phone and wallet when you’re arrested for murder.”

“You can pay next time,” she told you with a snort, quickly adding “if I let you.”

The elevator ride passed along silently, and it wasn’t long before you were headed down the street to a 24 hour diner that you’d mentioned to Rosa last night. You waited until you were seated and food was ordered before starting a conversation.

“About what you said earlier,” you began with your gaze locked on the straw wrapper you were toying with, completely missing Rosa’s panicked expression.

“Look, we can just forget I said anything.”

“No!” You lowered your voice after noticing a few wary glances, turning back to Rosa and pulling her hands into yours. “I don’t want to forget it, but I was hoping to say it first.”

“You love me too?”

“I do.” You squeezed her fingers with a grin. “I love you, Rosa, and I love Arlo for giving me an excuse to keep seeing his mom, because I sure as hell would’ve been too nervous to come up with one on my own.”

Expecting Rosa to be too uncomfortable with PDA, you pulled her hands closer to drop a kiss on her knuckles, pleasantly surprised when she pulled away to hold your jaw in place, leaning forward to press her lips to yours.

-

Tags: @gaulty74 @creepingwolfberry @rosadiazswifey @xetherealbeautyx @milkfromhell 

[space-helen]

Back To Vegas - Chapter 3

Words: 2285

Pairing: Nick Stokes x reader

A/N: Again, I’m sorry this took so long to come out! This one also fleshes the case further 

CH1     CH2     CH3     CH4     CH5    CH6   CH7   CH8

______________________

The ride with Grissom was smooth and a lot quieter than the one with Catherine. It took him a while to even say anything to you. “So, Y/n. What made you want to be a CSI then?”

“I love to help others and like to find out why and what the truth is even if it’s a truth that people don’t like. Also it’s a career where you learn something new every day, be it about the world or about people.”

He nodded “I like that. Learning is important. Why’d you come to Vegas?”

“I was with Nick when you called. Selfishly I came because he was coming but also the change of scenery is welcome and change of people. I’ve not known you all long but you all seem really really nice and I’m grateful for that. Some of the people on my shift back in San Diego were not the most pleasant.”

“That’s no way to be.”

You agreed with the man. “So you and Sara?”

There was a pause and it made you re-think what you’d asked. “You don’t have to answer that of course. I know Nick has told me little bits but I don’t want to intrude. I understand if it’s too soon we barely know each other yet.” you rushed out

“No. No, it's fine.” you could hear a slight smile in his voice. “I have to admit I’ve warmed up to you quickly which is unusual but I’d trust Nick with my life and I know he trusts me with his. I trust his judgment and as soon as I saw you two together I knew you were meant to be. Sara and I are married, Nick has probably told you about the whole affair over the years. I love her and always have.” He shrugged.

“Yeah Nick told me about some stuff. He also told me about how you saved his life. Thank you.”

He nodded and you could see the memories rushing through his head by the way his expression changed slightly. “It wasn’t a pleasant time for anyone but I’m glad we got him out of there. Anyway, Sara and I came back not long before everyone else and I’m glad we did. I'd be devastated to see the lab deteriorate anymore than it has. We all dedicated so much time to it so it’s the least we could do.” he paused and you could see him contemplating whether to say what he wanted next.

“I know we’ve not long met but I know that face means you’re not sure whether to say something. C’mon out with it I don’t mind.” you re-assured the man.

“Once we knew you and Nick were coming Greg filled us in on the two of you a little bit.”

You smiled “I’d never met Greg in person until I came to Vegas but I knew Nick and him kept in contact and talked a lot. Still best friends.”

“Yeah. Well he told us about the case that Nick and you were on and I just wanted to say thank you for looking out for him.”

“I did what anyone would do.”

“No. You did more than that.” he left a small silence. It wasn’t awkward or unpleasant. “Did Nick tell you about when Sara was taken and how they all found out about my feelings for her?”

You shook your head and he continued “When I realised why she’d been taken we were all looking at a miniature scene that had been created that included her. I didn’t think before speaking and told the room that they took Sara because she was the only person I ever loved.”

“Do you regret it?”

“Never,” he admitted. “How’d you feel about Catherine?” you could see a smile tugging at his lips.

“She’s really nice and very interesting-”

“She warmed up to you quickly as well. Take that as the highest compliment.”

The rest of the journey was filled with conversation about the lab, old working stories and dynamics.

Upon parking the vehicle you and Grissom both jumped out, a smile on both of your faces as you moved to the trunk to grab your kits and evidence. It didn’t take long for Catherine to join you and for all three of you to walk inside.

“I’ll review the tape.” Catherine offered. “I’ll log all of her belongings?” you suggested.

“Sounds good I’ll review the pictures of the scene.”

You nodded and the three of you quickly split up to get to work.

You carefully took pictures of the victims handbag before opening it, snapping a photo and emptying the contents. You analysed all of the belongings and took photos as you went. Her bag included a couple of photo booth strips of her and some friends, her purse still filled with cash and cards, a water bottle and some other smaller bits like mints.

You swabbed and printed the bag and contents. Meticulously ensuring you pulled everything useful. Packing the items up carefully you were placing them into a cardboard evidence box when a voice form the doorway caught your attention. “They’re ready for us with the body.” It was Catherine.

“You want me to come as well?”

“Yeah, yeah. It’s your first body in Vegas after all.” 

You smiled “You don’t have to ask me twice.”

The journey was quick and you were soon standing over the body with Grissom and Catherine next to you. The coroner, David, was completing some paperwork before he move over to join the three of you. 

“Although the vic has a visible head wound that is almost definitely not the cause of death. Upon first look she seemed healthy but she died of a heart attack.” “Blood to tox?” Catherine questioned

“Of course.” the man replied. “There is no sign of a struggle on the body either.”

“So would you say natural causes or?” you asked

“It’s peculiar, there’s nothing in her record that would suggest she’d be at risk of a heart attack.”

The four of you continued to discuss the body. The door opening made you all freeze and turn, Nick, Greg and Sara were all admitting themselves to the room. 

“Sorry, we’ll wait outside.” Greg spoke

“No need.” Grissom replied “We’re just about done here.”

The two teams passed each other. Grissom smiled as he passed Sara and Nick gently caught your finger tips with his as you passed each other. 

Grissom and you wore your smiles down the corridor “Guys c’mon that’s school kid behaviour.” Catherine joked.

“Says you.” Grissom nudged her in the side playfully and the three of you laughed.

After some time you were soon called into tox, you greeted the dark haired man sat at his desk.

“It’s great to meet and work with you Y/N.” he quickly turned his attention to the results “The blood didn’t come back entirely clean. There was a mixture of some different substances which include elevated potassium levels.”

“Potassium?” the three of you questioned. 

“Yeah. Enough to overdose.”

“That explains the heart attack” Grissom announced 

“How does that even happen?” Catherine enquired

“A general buildup of it over time? Maybe she was taking supplements and eating a lot of potassium-rich foods. It’s hard but not impossible, we had someone else a couple of weeks ago with the same thing.”

“Looks like we have some digging to do.” you added.

“We certainly do.” Catherine’s voice came. “I’ll chase up the warrant for her place.”

The three of you split ways and you trailed down the corridor to grab a drink from the break room, Grissom had told you to do so while he went to chase Greg for the other Potassium overdose case.

You rounded the corner into the room and bumped into a form, you instantly apologised and felt hands gently grasp your upper arms to make sure you didn’t fall.

“It’s alright.” the voice laughed and you recognised it straight away.

“Fancy seeing you here.” you joked.

“How’re things?” he questioned letting go of you and watching you enter the room to make yourself a drink. He eventually stepped back inside and sat down.

“They’re good. Strange case to kick off with. Looked like just a heart attack in a young woman but was actually a potassium overdose which caused it.”

“Really? Our vic had a lot of head trauma from a fall and some bruises which look like they were from drug use. Signs of a struggle, so a pretty normal case?”

“Normal huh.”

“In comparison yeah.”

You laughed and took a sip of your drink. “I’m just waiting for Catherine to get a warrant for the place. I doubt she’ll get it before the end of our shift though..”

“Greg said warrants have been slower.”

“Let me know if you’re working overtime?”

“Can do.” with that he left you in peace to enjoy your short break.

Your quick break went by in a blink of an eye. You soon found yourself back with Grissom.

“What’ve you got?” you questioned walking towards the table in the centre of the room.

“Vic was a twenty six year old female. Recently employed at a local highschool to teach Chemistry.”

“Heart attack from potassium overdose?”

“Yep. Found in her car at the wheel on the side of the road. She’d been driving home from work. She was about two minutes away from making it home.”

“Just ruled out as natural I suppose?”

“Greg said they investigated her place and she was on some sort of new diet found online and it so happened to have high levels of potassium in all of the foods and recipes. Supplements were also found in her desk drawer at work.”

You nodded “At the time I can see how that would be mistaken for an unfortunate incident but now… it most definitely is not. Two cases within the past month?”

“Looks like we have our work cut out for us.” The man pushed the file over to you while he began to rummage through the evidence box.

The two of you worked the hours away comfortably before Catherine appeared.

“The warrant will be ready for the beginning of our next shift. I tried all I could.” she shrugged defeatedly stepping further into the room. “If you guys are in a good place I’d suggest calling it a day and coming back tomorrow.”

You looked up at the clock and realised you’d worked longer than you were scheduled, it wasn’t uncommon but you felt bad going home now. “Are you sure I don’t mind staying longer. I’ll just need to tell Nick-”

“No it’s alright. I think we could all use the time. This one looks like it could get hectic.” Grissom admitted as he started to pack everything away.

The three of you packed everything away as you caught Catherine up on everything you’d found before walking to the locker room together. 

Nick was sitting on the bench and instantly turned to the door as he heard your voice, a big smile on his face. 

“Nick. I’m sorry I didn’t let you know.”

“It’s alright, I walked past and saw you working so I thought I’d wait a little.”

“Thank you.” you grabbed your things from your locker as the room bustled with conversation. 

“I’d love to stay and chat but I’m hungry.” Catherine admitted “Frank’s?”

“Did someone say Frank’s?” Greg interrupted as he poked his head around the door frame.

“Yeah. You down?” Catherine asked the man.

“I sure am. Nick? Y/N? Griss?”

“I’ll see if Sara wants to join.” 

Nick looked at you “I think we should head home. Sam is probably wondering where we are.”

You nodded “Yeah. Some other time though?”

“You’re welcome any time.”

Nick and you said your goodbyes to the group and made your way out to your car. Slipping into the passenger’s seat you allowed the man to drive. “First day ok?”

“More than ok.”

“I’m glad.” he smiled.

The ride went by quickly and the two of you were soon moving through the front door. Sam jumping up on you brought a huge smile to your face “Hi, did you miss us?” you pet the dog and he jumped down, walking to his bowl and sitting in front of it. You followed the dog and gave him some food.

“Food then bed or just bed?” Nick asked.

“Snack then bed? I’m super tired but could use something to tie me over.”

“Sounds good to me.” The man quickly prepared some sliced fruit for the two of you and you smiled. Back in San Diego it was a ritual you’d kept since you went to visit him in the hospital.

The two of you took the fruit through to the bedroom and helped yourselves as you got ready for bed. Sam joining you once he was done with his own food. Nick stopped to give Sam some attention while you crawled into the bed. 

The man moved the fruit plate onto the dresser after taking the last couple of pieces. Crawling into bed he opened his arms and you gratefully sunk into them with your head on his chest as he rubbed circles into your back.

“They love you already, I can tell.” the man reassured.

“I know. I was nervous but they’re really lovely, welcoming people.”

“Different from before right?”

You laughed “Yeah. I loved them but God, they could be assholes.”

He agreed and kissed you on the top of the head “I love you.”

“I love you too.” you got comfy and felt your eyes get heavy “Night night.” you mumbled.

“Night.” he whispered as he pulled you closer to him.

Next Chapter

Tag List: (open)

CSI:

Nick Stokes: @wanniiieeee  @pumpkinfriend

[herewegobacktomoon2]

Karaoke night

“Will they make it?” Maya asked concerned.

“They have very severe burns and all the smoke inhalation isn't helping, but you guys arrived just in time, so it hasn't compromised anything irreversibly.” Bailey said “We can't make promises but I'm positive about it”.

“I really hope you're right” Maya added, letting out a slow breath she didn't know she was holding.

“Luckily for you, I usually am!” Bailey exclaimed, raising her eyebrows in satisfaction, trying to lighten the mood  “Go home Bishop, if there's any significant update, I'll let you know”.

“Thank you Bailey”. She said, checking the time and seeing her shift was due to be over like an hour ago, so she opted for heading home.

She had tough calls almost every week, but some of them hit her harder than the others, and this one was one of them: they had arrived at the scene when it was already a three-alarm fire, because they couldn't put out the fire as it seemed to be originated by something that kept on igniting it every time they tried to use water or normal extinguishers. The problem was that when 23 arrived there first, their captain thought the fire started because of a short-circuit, which wasn't completely wrong, but what they hadn't noticed was that there was something more. They kept on using CO2 extinguishers, but that didn't seem to work. When 19 arrived, the situation was insanely bad: they still hadn't been able to rescue the couple inside of the house and nothing had improved. When Maya checked the structure, she noticed a slightly detached garage, which was linked to the building through a dangerous roofing containing asbestos but hadn't  been checked: the fire kept on reigniting because it was a metal involving fire, and that's why both water and CO2 were useless. Luckily, they had the right equipment to contain the situation, due to a training course they had done previously that week: while she contacted the specialized team for these kind of fires, they were able to put it out after a while, and she had to go in to help find the couple. When they found them, they were unconscious, but they still had a pulse: it was weak, but it was there. What moved Maya so much was how they had found them: they were two women, full of sooth and dust, one of them trying to cover with her body the other, trying to prevent her from inhaling too much smoke. They had rings on their hands, the same one, so they were probably a couple: obviously, it wasn't the first time she had to save a family, but that view made her think of Carina, her family. At the only thought of losing her, she felt sick, she couldn't breathe, but she had to focus back on the present, to be able to actively help. As soon as she was out, she jumped on the aid car and, while heading towards the hospital, using the update of her probably being late at home as an excuse, she called Carina, who had a day-off, just to hear her voice and let it soothes her.

While she was driving home, she replayed that image in her head, over and over again, and she felt her chest tighten, as if the car was closing in on her. Before stepping inside, she shook her thoughts away and took the keys. As soon as she opened the door, she was welcomed by the warmest smile she had ever seen.

“Ciao Bella! I missed you” Carina said, coming over towards the blonde, who didn't even bother to say anything, just going straight for a lingering kiss.

“I missed you too. A lot.” Maya finally added, looking the Italian in the eyes, before pulling her in a  tight hug.

“How was your day?” Carina asked, noticing that something was probably off, but willing to give Maya the time she needed to talk about it.

“It was tough, actually pretty tough” she replied, exhausted “but I'm finally here with you and that's all that matters right now”, she added, caressing Carina's face, kissing her softly.

“Yeah, I'm always here with you bella!” Carina stated, trying to reassure Maya, who still seemed a little off “if you want, we can call Andy and Vic and put off the party, so that you can relax”.

At those words, Maya's eyes went wide: how was it possible that she had forgotten about it?

“Mmm, it looks like someone forgot about the party here” Carina chuckled against Maya's lips.

“Yep, I know, I know. I'm hopeless.” the blonde said, smiling a little “Anyway, no, I don't want to postpone it. I think it will be fun. I only need to take a shower and I'm ready”

“Take your time, bella. Vic and Andy will be here in an hour.” the Italian explained

“Sooooo... that means you could join me?” Maya asked, not as flirty as usual, just needing to have her girlfriend close.

“Mmm, let me think...” Carina faked doubting her answer “As the snacks and everything are already set up, I think I can make the effort to join you” she added jokingly.

“Glad to know spending time with me is an effort, Dr. De Luca, how kind of you to let me know it!” she exclaimed, trying to sound offended.

“Well, that's the only effort I'm never gonna complain about, Captain Bishop.” she reiterated, in order to keep the mood light and easy, wishing to cheer Maya up a little.

“Mmm, that's a pretty good point, I have to admit” the blonde grinned softly, wrapping her arm around the Italian's waist, heading to the bathroom.

While they were showering, they were standing under the hot water, next to each other, Carina gently stroking Maya's hair, “Promise me” the blonde said, out of the blue “that you won't leave me”.

It caught the Italian off guard, but she immediately replied “Of course, I promise bella. Why would you think so?” she whispered, turning Maya's face towards her so that they were facing each other.

“The call, today... I couldn't help but think about you: that couple, their lives turned upside down in the blink of an eye... I can't lose you” her voice cracked.

“And you won't bambina, ever “ Carina knew she couldn't make promises, because life is unpredictable, but she felt the urge to reassure Maya and she truly believed her own words “Come here”.

They stood there, hugging each other until Maya's breath started slowing down. When they got out of the shower, hands still intertwined, they quickly got ready and within 15 minutes, the doorbell rang. “Hi Andy! Hi Vic! Hi...ehm...Michelle? Did I get it right?” Carina greeted warmly.

“Yeah, you're right!” Michelle smiled back “thanks for having me over without warning.” she added, looking around, trying to spot where Maya was.

Andy noticed her and gave her a look, before walking towards Carina and asking if her friend was okay, receiving a slight nod from the Italian.

A few seconds later, Maya walked into the living room, going straight to where Carina was standing, near the sofa, pressing a kiss on her cheek, looking at her with heart eyes.

“Oh C'mon guys, you're too cheesy. I can't with you two” Vic shouted, making everyone laugh.

“Shut up Hughes, or I'll kick your ass at the karaoke contest later, and also you don't want to be on toilet duty for next week, do you?” the blonde reiterated, raising her eyebrows.

“See?” Vic said raising her hands, looking at Carina “she is like that with EVERYONE.  She's an aggressive pitbull with us, then with you... it turns out she's a little puppy. What kind of black magic is this???” the younger firefighter added teasingly “And anyway, that's abuse of power, Cap.”

Carina couldn't help but laugh and so did Maya, even though she didn't wait to tease back “Good call Hughes. Two weeks on toilet duty, you're welcome.” she stated, getting a groan as a response.

“Ok, something is telling me that it's going to be a loooong night” Andy said, walking towards the table “Can we eat something, I'm starving!” she continued, picking up some bags she had brought with drinks and homemade tacos.

“These tacos smell soo good” Carina stated, helping Andy to serve the food, while Vic and Maya were setting up the TV, the audio and the sofa for the contest.

“Michelle prepared them, it's my tía's special recipe” she explained, inviting Michelle to join them.

“Oh thank you” You didn't have to!” Carina said “I'm sure they taste amazing.”

“I really hope so” Michelle shyly smiled “So...you are an OB/GYN at Grey Sloan?” she asked, out of curiosity.

“Yep, I've been working there for three years now.” Carina replied “It's an amazing job: every life is worth every problem you may run into, all the cryings and the misunderstandings” she continued, thinking about Teddy's child, Amelia's and all the other babies she was able to bring into this world. “What about you?” she asked back.

“Well, I'm a bit of a mess right now” she chuckled “at first, when Andy joined the academy, I wanted to do the same, especially when I heard about some friends of hers who were really hot, but I gave up before even sending my application, I wasn't cut out for the job.” she admitted “So I started dancing again and now I'm giving salsa classes for little kids, but it doesn't pay off for the effort. Kids are exhausting!”.

“I see your point, they are often hyperactive!” the Italian added “but I love dancing! A friend of mine has a school and I know she's looking for staff, if you want, I can talk to her about you!” she offered kindly, not catching the hint about the “hot friends” which actually was only about Maya.

“Are you serious??” she almost shouted “That would be amazing!!”

“Yes, I am!” she laughed “I'll talk to her tomorrow and let you know!”.

“Thank you Carina, you made my day.” Michelle stated, a wide grin on her face.

“What's all this euphoria about?” Andy asked, pretty confused.

“Carina just told me that her friend is looking for qualified staff for her dance school, and it may mean no more crying kids” she answered, still a bit shocked.

“Oh and no more me hearing about your complains! That would be revolutionary” she joked “This needs a cheer”.

“What needs a cheer?” Maya and Vic asked together, walking towards the kitchen.

“Your girlfriend is an angel” Andy declared “and I'm starting to think she has magic powers for real.”

“I told you!! She's from an outer world” Vic added vehemently, getting looks from Maya and Andy “Ok, that sounded a little bit too aggressive but you got the point! Anyway, I'm up for the cheer!”.

“So am I, even though I'm slightly confused” Maya admitted, walking to Carina and wrapping her arm around her “but I know your special powers so, I've no doubts it's well deserved” she whispered, making Carina blush and turn towards her.

“I love you” she whispered back, leaving a kiss on Maya's lips, as if they were alone in their bubble, but that didn't last for too long.

“Nope, not again under my salad.” Vic stated, pulling Maya away towards the couch “We have to play, but if you're in this mode we won't even start”.

“Just... out of curiosity: which mode are you talking about?” Maya furrowed her eyebrow.

“Are you seriously asking me that? You only have two: the “Bad bitch” mode or “the simp” one. I guess you'll figure it out on you're own which one I was talking about”.

“You're risking a lot tonight Hughes” Andy chuckled, knowing her friend.

“I'm speaking facts and you know that Herrera” Vic said, matter of fact.

After having some food and a few drinks so that everyone was a little tipsy, but still almost sober, they got settled in the couch and Vic explained the rules.

“So, the game works like this: Andy will be the judge and she will pick the songs. As soon as one of us knows the title, we have to get up and the first one who does it must say the title, the singers and sing a little part of it. One point only if we get everything right. Is everything clear?” She demanded.

“Yep, but... what are the teams?” Maya asked, looking at the younger firefighter but stroking Carina's hand who was sitting next to her.

“Oh yes, I had forgotten. Carina and I will be together, so Maya and Michelle, you two make the other team.”  Vic added.

“Wait, what? Why?” Maya groaned disappointed, causing Carina to laugh.

“Because we need you active and present, and if you're in the same team as Carina, you won't definitely be that.” Andy teased.

“Fine” Maya mumbled “Michelle: we have to win!”

“You bet!” Michelle immediately replied, squeezing the blonde's arm with no reason, causing Carina to crinkle her nose.

“You ready? 3...2...1...”

Music playing (Blank Space)

As soon as the first words were sang, Maya stood up and shouted “Me, me, I know it.”

“Ok, title and singer. Then you have to sing a part which is not the refrain”. Andy stated.

“Blank Space, by Taylor Swift.” she answered fiercely and then started to sing as a teenager driving in her car in the middle of the night “And I know you heard about me, So hey, let's be friends I'm dying to see how this one ends, Grab your passport and my hand...”

“Ok, ok, I got it, you know the song!” Andy laughed at her friend's enthusiasm, glad she was feeling better.

“Sorry, I got carried away” Maya admitted, turning to look at Carina, who was there, looking back at her with a loving smile.

“Ok, 1-0 for Maya and Michelle.” Andy remarked, making Vic groan. “Let's go with another one...”

Music playing (I like it)

Within a second, Michelle got up and started moving around “No me esperaba un golpe tan bajo prima” she said, starting to sing along with the song which she was weirdly used to listening to every time she broke up “I like it by Cardi B”

“That's not fair, what's all this camaraderie?” Vic mumbled “ you're the judge!!”

“I just wanted to piss you off a little” Andy chuckled “Anyway, 2-0 for Maya and Michelle”.

“Carina, we can't let them win!! I want you to be the most competitive you've ever been in your life!” Vic said, almost commanding it.

“Yes, I promise we'll win! I'm ready to kick asses” Carina stated, causing Maya to laugh a little.

“Here we go with the third one...” Andy said.

Music playing (she looks so perfect)

On the first note, Carina jumped off the couch “ It's She looks so perfect by 5SOS”, and she continued, screaming to the top of her lungs from the very first second until the refrain came “She looks so perfect standing there, In my American Apparel underwear, And I know now, that I’m so down, Your lipstick stain is a work of art, I’ve got your name tattooed in an arrow heart, And I know now, that I’m so doooooown”.

While singing, she got closer to Maya, feeling every word she was saying, causing the blonde to blush before she pulled her in for a soft kiss and a gentle stroking on her chin.

“Ok, ok, I'm not gonna complain because you got us the point but please come back to this world, cause we're still 2-1 for them, the judge is impartial and we need to win” Vic said, pulling Carina back towards her seat.

“Sorry, I got carried away too.” Carina admitted sheepishly, probably alcohol inhibiting all of her composure.

“Yep, you two should walk around with stones on your feet, you get carried away a little too often” the younger firefighter mumbled.

“Competitive Vic is quite a pain in the neck” Andy teased “not the normal one is something so different though”. Vic faked to get offended before Andy picked the fourth song.

Music playing (Chicago, All that jazz)

All of them were looking at each other confused, but Vic immediately got up and started dancing “Start the car, I know a whoopee spot, Where the gin is cold, But the piano's hot. It's just a noisy hall,Where there's a nightly brawl, And all that jaaaaaazz!”

“It's All that jazz from the musical Chicago by Catherine Zeta Jones” Vic shouted, out of breath “C'mon guys, you don't know it?????”

“I heard it but I didn't remember the title” Maya admitted “Anyway, how about the camaraderie now?? You're the only one which is into musical sooo...” she groaned.

“I guess now we're even.” Vic nonchalantly claimed.. “We can do it Carina!”

“You're unbelievable” Maya mumbled, before the fifth song started playing.

Music playing (Mirrors)

Before Michelle could get up, Carina was already singing, Vic already celebrating for the point while the Italian was once again getting closer to Maya, who this time was whispering the lyrics together with her girlfriend, not caring about the lost point.

“I don't wanna lose you now, I'm looking right at the other half of me, the vacancy that sat in my heart is a space that now you hold.” they both sang together, lightly swinging from side to side, with Maya's head buried in Carina's neck getting an “AWW” from Andy and the usual groan from Vic, who was secretly enjoying the scene which actually looked like a film.

“It's Mirrors by Justin Timberlake anyway”. Carina said, wanting to be correct.

After a few minutes, everyone got back in their seat, after deciding Andy should just opt for the shuffle play.

“3-2 for Carina and Vic now” Andy remarked. “Ready?”

Music playing (Numb)

Vic and Michelle gave each other a look, the song playing not really their genre and also Andy seemed pretty confused. Carina knew the song but was too worried checking in on Maya's reaction that she didn't even think about getting up to get the point.

Maya downplayed it very well, trying to keep the mood light so after saying that it was Numb, by Linking Park, she started singing as if she was at a concert. Nobody but Carina noticed the change in her eyes and with the excuse of having a little pause before continuing, she took Maya's hand and brought her to their bedroom.

“Hey bambina, are you okay? I know how much that song means for you...” Carina asked gently, caressing Maya's face.

“Yeah, I'm okay, it was just a moment, it hit me a little, but I'm okay, I promise” Maya admitted, looking down, searching for Carina's left hand.

Carina knew it was the song Maya used to listen to every day when she became aware of her father abusive behavior, she knew how much all the words showed how bad Maya was hurting and that even though she had come a long way, scars could easily start bleeding again.

“Come here” the Italian said, hugging the blonde as tight as she could, knowing that it would give her the comfort she needed.

“I love you so much” Maya said, pulling Carina in for another lingering kiss.

“I love you too”, she whispered back against her lips, before kissing her again.

Within few seconds, they were back in the living room, Vic giving Maya an annoyed look.

“What??” Maya asked.

“You're trying to bribe my teammate!!” Vic shouted, causing Maya to mumble.

“Maya, we need to win!! If we do, I promise I'll bring more tacos the next time!” Michelle said, taking Maya by the hand and pulling her towards her seat. Maya didn't even notice the little flirt, but Carina surely did and she didn't like it at all, but she didn't want to make a scene so she just started cursing the woman internally.

“Ok, 3-3...here we go” Andy reestablished the order.

Music playing (Born this way)

As it was hard to find a straight person in that house, they all got up but the very first one was paradoxically Vic, who even started dancing with the exact steps. “Born this way by the Queen of Queens, Lady Gaga” She shouted, in a very Travis' way, as she kept on singing it.

“What kind of joke is this?” Maya teased “You're the only straight person in here and you just stole our hymn!! That's not fair!!”.

“Take it up with Travis. This is the soundtrack to his workout sessions everyday, so I know every single note of this song” she admitted proudly “I think people could actually believe I'm Lady Gaga if it wasn't for the height difference” she joked.

“Oh yeah, because height is the only difference” Maya teased “Hughes, I love your naivete, it's so cute!” she added.

“Bishop, fuck you” Vic reiterated, throwing a cushion at her friend.

“Ok, it's getting serious now. 4-3 for Carina and Vic: these are the last two songs. Maya and Michelle, if you win this, there's the final battle”. Andy declared.

“We're ready” Maya replied, on the edge of the couch.

Music playing (Dura)

As soon as the music started playing, Vic understood it was some raeggeton music which she didn't know at all but Michelle undoubtedly would. In fact, within two seconds, the Latina got up, shouting “It's Dura, by Daddy Yankee” and started singing, probably a little too tipsy. “Cuando yo la vi, Dije, si esa mujer fuera para mí, Perdóname, te lo tenía que decir, 'Tás dura, dura”

While singing she got closer and closer to Maya, looking at her like she was addressing those words to her, but Maya didn't even seem to care or understand what was going on. In the meantime, Carina was watching the scene, trying hard to contain herself, before she heard Michelle whispering something in Spanish to Andy.

“Si no fuera que ella está con Carina, ya le habría pedido que tengamos una cita...esta tía esta demasiado buena. Deberías habérmela presentado antes prima: os conocéis desde la academia, no me lo puedo creer”.

Carina was pretty fluent in Spanish, so she understood everything: all she wanted to do was telling Michelle to stay the hell away from her girlfriend, but what she did instead was showing that Maya wasn't going anywhere.

While the music was still playing, she got up and sat on Maya's lap, starting to dance in a very flirty way: the blonde was now more than alert and she couldn't help but smile at the Italian, gently caressing her back and kissing her neck. If it wasn't for Vic again, they had (at least Maya) completely forgotten they weren't alone.

“What was that for?” Maya asked grinning to Carina.

“Nothing, just a little reminder” Carina smirked before kissing the blonde and then going back to her seat.

“This is the last song, I want you to be extremely concentrated” Andy stated in a serious tone.

“We got this” Vic said “We have to win” she added, talking to Carina.

“Yes, yes, yes!” Carina replied, sitting on the edge.

For this last song, Andy decided to take a little revenge on Maya: as she had won their last Taboo game, she wanted to give Carina and Vic a little help to get their last point and win the competition. She opted for an Italian song, but little did she know Maya had improved a lot...

Music playing (Anche fragile)

It was a fraction of second: Maya was already up, the lyrics hadn't even started but she had already said the title “It's an Italian song, it's Anche Fragile by Elisa”.

Andy and Vic were shocked, but not Carina, as it was her favorite song and she used to play it on repeat on their nights together, so she knew that Maya would have recognized it.

“Well, you have to sing it or you won't get the point” Andy declared, sure that her friend couldn't bring her self to speak a word of that “weird” language.

Carina chuckled knowing that Maya would have probably messed up all the words, but instead, she was caught off guard, as the blonde started singing it.

“Tienimi su quando sto per cadere, tu siediti qui parlami ancora se non ho parole, Io non te lo chiedo mai, ma portami al mare, a ballare...”  

Everyone's eyes were wide open at the unexpected event that had just happened and the Italian couldn't believe it either.

“Bella, you learned it!” she said, still a little moved from the gesture.

“Yes, I learned the whole song actually” she confessed, blushing a little.

“Thank you” Carina said grinning, pulling Maya in for a soft kiss.

“Ok Bishop, I must admit: you deserved it” Vic admitted, raising her hands “you practically sang a song in Italian, that was awesome! And it also shows how much of a simp you are!” Vic couldn't help but teasing.

“Shut up, Hughes” Maya shouted, throwing back at her the cushion from before.

“Oh crap, it's almost Midnight and I had said to Robert I would have been home by 23. I think we should go!” Andy said, picking up her stuff “Thank you girls, for everything, it was good fun and I really enjoyed it!” she added, heading towards the door.

“Yep, so did I, despite knowing that my Cap will put me on toilet duty only because I speak facts about how in love she is with her super hot Italian girlfriend” Vic teased again, getting a little smack from Maya “No, apart from joking, it was awesome! We have to do this again”.

“I'll think about it, very carefully” Maya teased back.

“Thank you for everything, really. Especially you Carina, about the work” Michelle said, making Carina to force a little smile “And thank you Maya, it was very nice getting to see you again” she added, caressing Maya's hand.

Before waving them goodbye, that's when Carina thought she should make things a little bit clearer: “Lo siento mucho, pero quería decirte que Maya ya tiene novia, así que deja tu alma en paz y empieza a buscar a otra chica. Sé que es muy guapa, pero también sé que es mi novia y quisiera que tu también no te olvidaras de eso. Entendido?” [I'm really sorry, but I wanted you to know that Maya has already a girlfriend. So, just give it up and start looking for someone else. I know she's hot, but I also know she's my girlfriend and I'd like that you didn't forget about it either. Got it?]

As those words let her mouth, Michelle's jaw dropped and completely embarrassed, she reached Andy who was waiting for her with Vic in the car.

When Carina closed the door, she turned around and she saw a very confused Maya staring at her: “So you know Spanish??” she asked.

“A little, I studied it at high-school and kept on practicing it with TV series” she explained.

“And why were you talking to Andy's cousin in Spanish” Maya asked again, still not figuring out what was going on.

“I just wanted to make things clearer and I thought it was the best way” she said, walking towards the blonde and wrapping her arms around her waist.

“And what did you need to get across that well that couldn't be said in English?” Maya chuckled, putting her arm around Carina's neck.

“Maya, you didn't notice, did you?” Carina wondered, laughing a little.

“Notice what?” Maya asked, now more confused than ever.

“She was flirting with you!! And I also heard her talking to Andy about you in Spanish, but unluckily to her, I understood everything”. She explained.

“Wait, really???” Maya couldn't believe it. She didn't acknowledged it at all, too busy admiring Carina.

“Yes, so I just wanted to let her know that she better stays away from you, if her intentions are flirting all the time!” Carina groaned jealously, making Maya laugh.

“Oh so, someone is jealous... it could be a good thing...” Maya smirked “anyway, you only preserved hr from putting effort in something she couldn't achieve. I'm madly in love with you and you only.” she continued, more softly.

“That's a good thing too.” Carina smiled brightly, resting her head on Maya's neck and pulling her closer to steal her one more kiss.

As soon as they pulled away from the kiss to catch some air, Maya whispered something that made Carina's heart skip a beat.

“E non nasconderti con le battute, non mi sconcentrare, Stiamo a vedere dove possiamo arrivare E ridiamo insieme che ridiamo sempre, sempre, sempre”

“I thought you only learned it by heart” Carina said, eyes getting watery but the will to smile much stronger than the one to cry.

“I learned it so that I could understand all the words and why it meant so much to you” Maya admitted, Carina's smile growing wider and wider.

“And I also wanted you to know another thing...” Maya added.

“Tell me” Carina replied, moved and curious at the same time.

“You know that line that goes “Senza tutta questa fretta mi ameresti davvero?” she asked, and after getting a light nod in approval, she went on “Well, the answer is yes, I'd love you even if the world would never come to an end, 'cause I'll never get tired of loving you.”

“Bella I-” Carina tried to speak, but her voice cracked a little “You're amazing. You're probably the best thing that has ever happened to me.” she added.

“Probably?” Maya asked, furrowing her eyebrows, trying to sound offended.

“Yes, because I know that what we can make together, our story, our love, will always get better, day by day. Us is definitely the best thing that has ever happened to me” Carina explained, caressing the blonde's jaw.

“Mmm... you get away with it for tonight Dr. De Luca” Maya teased.

“Did I?” Carina teased back.

“Yeah, even though I think that, as it is midnight, we should start making the best of our next day from its very beginning” Maya smirked.

“Well, if you put it that way...” Carina grinned, pulling Maya towards their bedroom, knowing that she would always find the solution to every doubt and fear of hers in those deep blue eyes, that spoke nothing but unconditional love, which she was wholeheartedly willing to reciprocate.

[simplee-dreaming]

Werewolves of London

This is a Ler!Remus x Ler!Sirius x Lee!Reader tickle fic. This is surprisingly one of my favourites so i hope you enjoy it too! 

Summary: Y/N keeps referencing Werewolves of London in front of Remus to the point where she is being punished for something she didn’t do...

Word count: 1267

------------------------------------------

“Y/N! Do you want to look at the menu?” Remus shouted from the living room. You came out of the spare bedroom and raced down the stairs. 

You had been living with your Uncle Remus for a week now, it was the summer holidays and you had finished Secondary School for good so your parents let you stay with your favourite Uncle for a bit over summer as a treat. 

You walked into the living room and found Remus looking through a Chinese takeaway menu, you let out a little giggle. 

“What?” Remus asked, looking at you. 

“Nothing,” you replied, letting out a little giggle again. Remus turned to Sirius and they exchanged confused looks. 

“Y/N what are you giggling at?” Remus asked.

You paused for a moment, biting your lip before smiling. 

“I saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand” you sang out. Sirius scoffed into his tea. He was the one that introduced you to Werewolves of London by Warren Zevon...but Remus didn’t know that. 

“Excuse me?” he said, raising his eyebrow at you. He knew the song well because Sirius used to play it all the time when they first got together. You side-eyed Sirius but quickly looked away, careful not to get him in trouble. 

“Nothing” you smiled. You got up to look over Remus’ shoulder and read through the menu. After deciding what you wanted, Remus ordered and you wrapped your arms around his neck and rested your chin on his head. More lyrics of the song came into your head and you tried to bite back a giggle but failed. 

“Now what are you giggling at?” Remus asked. 

“I saw a werewolf drinkin' a piña colada at Trader Vic's….” you sang quietly. 

“Y/N…” Remus warned. You lifted a hand up and started stroking Remus’ hair.

“....and his hair was perfect.” You sang again. 

“I’m warning you…” 

“Okay I’ll stop.” You said, sitting on the other sofa. The three of you sat in silence on your phones. Remus was making sure the order was correct, you were scrolling through social media and Sirius was planning to get you in trouble. What you didn’t realise was he was connecting his phone to the sound system, ready to play Werewolves of London. He kept a straight face as he hit play and the song played through the speakers. Remus instantly looked at you. 

“Y/N...turn that off” he said.

“I didn’t do anything!” You exclaimed.

“You’re the only tech-savvy person here. Turn it off.”

“It’s not me!” 

“Turn it off or you’ll be in big trouble” 

Sirius sat quietly, rather amused that his evil plan was working. You looked at Sirius, who winked at you from behind Remus. Your jaw dropped slightly. 

“Don’t look at Sirius for help. Turn it off” Remus warned again.

“I-” you stammered, taken by surprise that your uncle-in-law would do this to you. 

“Right, you’ve had your warnings. I told you there would be trouble.” As quick as a flash, he had gone from sitting on his sofa to straddling you on yours.

“WAIT NO” You screamed out in surprise. 

“I won’t stop until you apologise.” Remus said before squeezing your sides. You bucked instantly and screamed. 

“WAHAHAHAIT” 

Remus smiled at you and scribbled his fingers into your stomach. You screamed again and grabbed hold of his wrists with your hands.

“Oh no no that won’t do.” He said before taking both your wrists in one hand and pinning them above your head. 

“First you mock me with that song and now you try and stop your punishment?” Remus used his free hand to tickle right in the hollow of your armpit. You started cackling. 

“NOHOHOHOT THEREHAHAHAHAHA” 

Remus always used to tickle you when you were a kid, and every time he knew exactly how to get you so it tickled bad. But every time you forgot just how bad it tickled until he attacked you again. Sirius started laughing with you, loving every second. 

Remus leaned down to blow a raspberry on your neck. He let go of both your arms to tickle both armpits simultaneously. You convulsed into silent laughter after letting out a loud scream. He chuckled at you and briefly paused the attack.

“Now, what have you got to say for yourself?” He asked 

“It-it wasn’t me” you breathed out. 

“After all that, you’re still denying it? Looks like someone really does want to be tickled today” Remus said.

“Get her feet, she’ll apologise then.” Sirius piped up. You shot him a glare and he winked at you again. You took your shot, if you were going down then he was coming with you. 

“It was Sirius! Sirius played it!” You yelled out as Remus went to turn around. He turned back to look at you. 

“Sirius can’t even turn on a computer let alone connect his phone to the sound system” Remus said. 

“Hey! That was one time.” Sirius huffed out. 

“It was still funny,” Remus smiled at him. “So why are you blaming him?” 

“Check his phone, he’s the one playing it!” 

“How very dare you Y/N. Blaming your old uncle-in-law. You really think I’m cruel enough to set you up?” Sirius asked, a fake pouting. Remus turned back to you, his eyebrow raised. 

“Sirius, come here.” Remus ordered. Sirius stood up and slowly walked towards Remus. You smiled, thinking you were finally off the hook. Remus looked at Sirius, then back at you. 

“You’re blaming my husband? That’s the final straw,” he said. Your smile dropped and your eyes widened. 

“Nononono, it was him I swear!” you cried out. Remus shook his head at you. 

“Sirius. Get her.” Remus said. Before you could protest again, Remus had shoved his hands back under your arms and Sirius sat on your legs, tickling your feet as fast as he could. You screamed louder than before, overwhelmed by the ticklish sensations. 

Sirius had peeled your toes back with one hand and used the other to quickly spider his fingers under your toes and up and down your soles. You tried to kick as best you could but you were trapped. You fell back into silent laughter, unable to move under the two of them. Luckily for you, the doorbell then rang and they both stopped instantly. 

“Saved by the bell,” Remus said. Sirius got up to answer the door and dished out the food whilst Remus cuddled you close, making sure you were okay. Whilst Sirius was in the kitchen, you gestured at Remus to look at his phone. He nodded and grabbed the phone to find Werewolves of London playing on repeat, hooked up to the sound system. Remus gasped and looked at you. 

“I’m so sorry Y/N. I didn’t think he knew how to use it.” Remus pulled you in for a tighter cuddle. 

“It’s okay,” You said. Remus knew you enjoyed being tickled anyway, but you also enjoyed his cuddles. 

“Actually. I have a plan, and I need your help,” Remus said, looking at you mischievously. 

Sirius carried all three plates out of the kitchen and placed them on the table. He turned around and saw you and Remus looking at him, your arms folded, eyebrows raised. 

“Well come on, tuck in,” Sirius said, gesturing at the food. You and Remus exchanged looks before putting your attention back on Sirius. 

“Dinner can wait.” Remus said. You both wiggled your fingers at him. Sirius stood there, eyes wide, before deciding to bolt into the living room. 

He was in for a long night. 

[deantransgressions2]

13x04 the big empty

23 transgressions. sigh.

#1: he was momentarily giving sam the silent treatment for no valid reason considering sam did nothing wrong.

time tag: 2:05

#2: name calling. and just being rude for no fucking reason

sam: “what you, uh, working on?”

dean: “dead guy in madison. police say it was a home invasion, but neighbor claims that she saw the vic’s dead wife leave the crime scene.”

sam: “let’s check it out.”

dean: “what, you ready to ditch damien? what do you wanna do? leave him in a ring of holy oil with some netflix and a frozen pizza?”

time tag: 2:09

#3: more name calling

dean: “uh, hell, no. what, “adventures in babysitting” the antichrist? no, thank you”

time tag: 2:25

#4: dean gave up on mary. AND kept trying to convince sam that lucifer killed mary even though SAM actually knows lucifer and dean does not. 

dean: “yeah, it is, actually. you wanna know why? because as long as he’s here, he’s not out there doing god knows what. so what, does this mean that your plan for bringing mom back isn’t working? ‘cause i’ll say it again....mom’s dead, sam. lucifer ripped out her freakin’ heart. now, the sooner you can wrap your head around that, the sooner we can all move on.”

time tag: 2:40

#5: an infant should not have to put effort into convincing a full grown man to not murder him. sam should not have to protect an infant from his abusive brother

jack: “dean can’t even look at me. he wants to kill me.” sam: “i won’t let that happen. listen, if there’s one thing that dean respects, it’s effort. so come along. help us out. let’s go be the good guys.”

time tag: 6:02

#6: jack attempted to open his car door to join sam and dean. dean forcefully slammed it back in his face and told him to stay put. 

time tag: 7:15

#7: he verbally assaulted an infant for not following instructions.....

dean: “hey! i told you to wait in the car. what the hell are you doing?” jack: “i’m trying to help out.” dean: “how is this helping out?”

time tag: 7:53

#8: made fun of jack for trying to help out

time tag: 8:08

#9: ordered jack to dig up the grave so he didn’t have to. sam said what we were all thinking:

dean: “all right, well, you said you wanted to help, so, uh… dig.”

sam: “dean, what’s up with all the orders? you’re starting to sound like dad.”

dean: “that a bad thing?”

sam: “i’m just saying his...his drill sergeant act worked with you… but it didn’t work with me. and that’s not the way we’re gonna get through to jack.”

dean: “look, you wanted the kid here, he’s here. all right? but I’m not gonna hold his hand and tuck him in at night. pass. i’m not gonna be his mother, and neither are you. and the kid can dig, so i’ll give him that.”

time tag: 8:49

#10: ordered jack to get food for all of them. sam told dean that he was treating jack like an “intern” and he wasn’t wrong!

time tag: 12:20

#11: not really a funny joke. like he’s a 40 year old man maybe he should grow up and stop talking shit about therapist and.....go fucking see one himself.

dean: “hmm. shrinks. snake oil for the mind.”

sam: “or how healthy people deal.”

dean: “yeah? all right, let’s see how good old, uh, gloria was dealing. here you go. “and now that i’ve achieved catharsis, i can truly see the program works.” the program? come on, i mean, she’s one kool-aid away from jonestown.”

time tag: 12:42

#12: the blatant verbal abuse...trivializing everything jack does or says...who the fuck seriously stans canon dean. if u do get help.

time tag: 13:19

#13: he had onions on his hotdog. so not only is he a child abuser, he ALSO smells like onions. makes everything he does this episode so much worse if that’s even possible

time tag: 13:38

#14: any form of ordering or demanding aggressively is a form of verbal abuse. name calling is also a form of abuse. here are two instances, both within the same scene:

receptionist: “oh, i’m sorry. you caught us right at the end of our day. maybe tomorrow.”

dean: “no, today’s good. like right now.”

and 

dean: “listen, mr. spock, you speak when i tell you to speak, okay?”

jack: “yes.”

dean: “good.”

time tag: 14:32

#15: dean was curt towards the therapist, who he just met and had treated him with nothing but kindness. 

time tag: 15:31

#16: insinuated that journaling is for girls/women. 

mia: “dean? you journal?”

dean: “ever since i was a little girl.”

time tag: 16:00

#17: insinuated that actually sam is the one that needs help, not him. denial and projection. you hate to see it. 

time tag: 16:32

#18: gaslighting, name calling, undermining, and diverting the conversation to find issues with sam instead of himself.

dean: “all right, this is a safe place, right, doc? okay. my brother’s delusional…”

sam: “dean.”

dean: “you said you wanted to give this a shot, right? here we go. he won’t even admit that mom’s dead. won’t even admit it.”

sam: “stop.”

dean: “because if he admits it, then it’s real. if it’s real, then he has to deal with it, and he can’t handle that.”

time tag: 16:42

#19: sigh. 

mia: “you just upset your brother so much, he had to leave the room. and jack? look at him. he’s terrified of you.”

dean: “nah. no, we’re simpatico. right, kid?”

jack: “we’re simpatico.” mia: “convincing.”

time tag: 19:02

#20: jack is trying to get through to dean and convince him that he can be useful. jack just wants dean to like him. and with abusers, being liked/respected and being viewed as an object can be a fine line. 

time tag: 25:50

#21: dean conditioning jack to seek validation from him. 

jack: “hey.” dean: “hey. you did good today, jack.”

time tag: 39:35

#22: “acting like a dick” is a massive fucking understatement. also, dean now only sees the value of jack’s life because he finally deems him useful. but, sam saw value in jack’s life simply because jack was a child and deserved a life. cas saw value in jack’s life before he was even born. sam and cas are the only two valid people in jack’s life 

dean: “listen, man, back at, uh, mia’s, i was out of line. i’m sorry for being a… a dick lately.”

sam: “thanks.” dean: “and maybe you’re right, about the kid. i mean, he tries. i’ll give him that. and he tapped his powers, saved our ass, so that’s a win.”

time tag: 39:56

#23: dean was verbally abusing his brother for doing something he actually wanted him to do (believing mary was alive)... hmm. 

time tag: 40:45

[droogiesanddiscourse]

Snow Day with the Reservoir Dogs

This wasn’t requested, but a little self-indulgent piece as I am currently being bombarded with 11 inches of snow on the north coast! Anyways hope you enjoy and possibly can relate if you’re in the same spot I am now! 

Warnings: Mentions of sex, but it is pretty tame. Nothing explicit. Enjoy! 

Mr. Orange (Freddy Newandyke) 

• A snow day is literally just what the doctor ordered for you and Freddy. He’s been working an awful lot recently, and has been feeling bad for neglecting you.

• Obviously he wouldn’t neglect you on purpose I promise he just is very overworked give him a break please. 

• So he is so excited to spend an entire day with you !!! 

• Two words: binge watching. Every show, movie, and cartoon the two of you have been slacking off on watching? Prepare for a full day marathon of back to back entertainment. 

• Will make a tent out of the couch, chairs, blankets, and pillows. Freddy will even give the tent a little ✨spice✨by hanging up fairy lights and paper lanterns. It’s super cozy aw. 

• The two of you get takeout from your favorite local restaurant too !!! 

• He holds you close and doesn’t ever want to let go, realizing how precious these moments truly are. 

Mr. Blonde (Vic Vega) 

• Vic is the first one awake, and will definitely wake you up with gentle caresses and kisses to your neck.  

• Trust me, you are basically not leaving the bed at all the entire day. 

• Lots of slow, sleepy sex as Vic constantly sings praises about how good you are, how beautiful your body is, how much he loves you.

• He’s just super mushy and romantic when he wants to be, and snow days happen to be one of those days. 

• Too lazy to cook or order food, the two of you are more interested in each other. It’s a leftover night, you scrounge whatever you can find in your fridge. 

Mr. White (Larry Dimmick) 

• Turns off all his alarms. The two of you sleep in together as late as you want. 

• He makes breakfast for you. Literally whatever your request is, you get it. His treat. It’s not the best, and your food might be a little burnt, but he really tries. It’s the thought that counts! 

• He literally walks around all day in just his underwear and boxer shorts hehe ;) sorry not sorry... 

• Puts on some of his favorite records, and slow dances with you in the living room. If you have two left feet, he’ll laugh as he tries to teach and guide you around the room. The snow is just the perfect backdrop. 

Mr. Brown

• OH MAN he is a kid in a candy shop when it snows. Dude’s up at the crack of dawn, shaking you to wake up and get outside. 

• He’ll drag you out to go sledding, have snowball fights, build a snowman, etc. You always know it’s gonna be a good time with your boyfriend Mr. Brown when it snows. He will make snow angels side by side with you, holding hands. He finds it super cute. 

• Oh also he will bring out a disposable camera or polaroid (w/e he prefers) in the snow and takes cute pictures of the two of you. 

• Is a little shit and will show snow down your shirt / pants and laughs as you scream and playfully hit him. He thinks its hysterical though. Of course you get him back, can’t let something like that go unpunished. 

• Will keep the two of you outside all day until you can’t feel your fingers and your cheeks are flushed red. 

• Mr. Brown Makes a mean cup of hot chocolate at the end of the day. To cap it off, the two of you binge watch winter-themed horror movies until the early morning hours. 

Mr. Pink

• Snow days are actually one of the only days of the year that Mr. Pink sleeps in past the crack of dawn. No expectations, no obligations, just peaceful bliss. 

• Eventually he will wake up when he smells you brewing coffee, trodding down the steps in his PJs. You giggle at his bedhead, his hair sticking straight up. He just looks so domestic in these moments, completely opposite than the hardened professional Mr. Pink usually is. 

• The two of you will always make breakfast together on these special days - always blueberry pancakes made from scratch. One of Mr. Pink’s secret hobbies is baking, something he picked up from you. 

• Usually snow days are just chill, lazing around the house, and cuddling by the fireplace wrapped in blankets. 

• In the evening, the two of you go through a sightseeing walk around your town hand in hand, admiring the winter wonderland landscape together.

[what-a-messsss]

2x3 rewatch

I keep forgetting that Brach is still in S2.  Oops.  Also, I apparently went to check something in S6 last time I watched something, so it started at 6x2 instead of 2x3 and I yelled.  But anyway, on with this mess.  “Death Came in Like Thunder” apparently.  It sure did.

Ah yes, let us not forget that Branch is MANLEH.  This shall be proven to us by him murdering his cousin, Trunk, with big ax.  Chop chop, Branch, kill Trunk.  But oh no, must also show that he is People Smart, so must also lose because this makes him likable.  And many white people clap.  Yaaaay.  But be sure to say, “I let him win, Ferg,” while your competitor is right next to you, so he almost surely heard you.  Good good.

Oh Ferg.  Could you look more gormless if you tried?  (I mean, probably not, since presumably that was the goal of the actor, so he would have been trying.  But still.)  Bb.

Heh, nice thematic cut to Walt also chopping wood.  And YAY, Henry’s gorgeous truck (and gorgeous self).  I’m just going to take a moment to appreciate the fact that Henry rolls up and just helps himself to some of Walt’s thermos of coffee.  Because of course he does.  But I do so love these touches that they put in that do underline the fact that they are married have been besties for going on 40 years.  Also, I love this jacket of Henry’s.  The woven top, jean jacket sort of one?  Yeah, top 5 costume pieces of his for me.  (Also on that list, all basically tied with each other, basically any pants he wears.  I am reminded, when they cut back out to a full body shot.  Because I am very shallow, and he is very pretty.)

Haaaaaa.  And of course Cady talked to Henry before she talked to Walt.  Walt is a butthead.  And, yeah yeah, she just found out that he’d been lying to her for over a year, but that just proves my point that Walt is a butthead.  And we’re back to this whole idea that she left her phone, which just... ugh.  No.  But Henry’s face when he says that she said that she is safe, and he’s so worried, but still willing to respect her boundaries.

“She is an adult, Walt.”  “She’s my daughter.”  For fuck’s sake, you jackass, your ADULT daughter; that’s the whole flipping point!  Also, that little emphasis on my daughter, pfft.  If you didn’t want to feel like she preferred her cool dad to you, maybe try being less of an AAAAAAASSHOLE.  And, like, respecting her.  Even a weensy little bit.

“Etta Place”  I don’t remember if we find out why that’s the ‘assumed name’ that Cady chose, but I’m intrigued.  Wait, I just googled.  Looooool.  She spent years with Butch and Sundance.  Nice.

Walt is such a soft touch with teens.  *snack crackle pop* that kneecap back into place.  Vic starts this scene saying, “The 911 operator,” though, which is interesting, because I was kind of under the impression that Ruby was the main dispatcher, so it would be kind of heartening if she actually had back up with that.  ...Or maybe they’re just far enough out that a cell call made would be picked up by a tower farther out and have to be routed back in to the station/them.  I have no idea how that actually works.  Another rabbit hole for me to totally not go down.  Hopefully.  Shit.  They’ve apparently upped the fine for trespass since the show, though, because it’s $750 (or 6 months in jail) now and Walt says it’s $500.

And once again, we see Vic actually wearing gloves while investigating a suspicious death, and Walt just squinting into the distance helpfully.  I suppose “things got bad” in Basque country around WWII, but there has been friction there that dates back before the Spanish Civil War, or even the Carlist Wars the previous century.  It did get gnarly with the dictatorship of Franco, and the formation of the ETA in retaliation, though, so yeah.  (Francisco Franco is also on the list of people who anybody with a time machine should go back and beat the shit out of.)

Shit, I forgot about the animal death.

Knock knock, no answer.  Better just wander in without a warrant.  I know that the guy who they know lives there is dead, but still, no fricking warrant; I suppose the worry of a poisoning could count as probably cause?  

Gods, but there are moments when I do absolutely adore Vic, and they are usually when she’s taking the piss out of Walt.  “Reclusive bachelor chic; you and Marco have the same decorator.”  Looool.  But also, sad, because Martha has only been gone for a little over a year, and Walt is not the kind of person who would, like, change stuff and get rid of her things, so that’s kind of odd.  Maybe Henry and/or Cady went though and put away some of her things to try to help Walt move on?  But damn, the ‘excuse you’ look on Walt’s face when she does say it, pffft.

AND AGAIN, Vic wearing gloves, Walt with his bare ass hands picking up the picture of Picasso’s Guernica; can you at least *pretend* you’re a cop, *some* of the time, buddy?

Lol at the barrabilak; they are pretty well by the Rocky Mountains, so it’s probably not all that surprising that Walt’s had some “Rocky Mountain oysters” before.

I had forgotten that Vic had four brothers.  But her comment about Sal going off to look after the sheep and how if someone had told her that one of her brothers were dead she “wouldn’t care about any damn sheep,” I don’t know.  It kind of annoys me.  It’s totally in character for her, which is good, but I think it’s part of what can annoy me about her character.  Different people grieve differently, but also, I know she’s only been in Wyoming for a year or two, tops, but how is it so hard to fathom that someone one would be concerned about their livelihood, even in the face of personal tragedy?  Just, seeing beyond her own very narrow experience doesn’t seem like something she’s very good at.  It would be one thing if she’d framed it as “this is suspicious, and here’s why I think so as a cop,” but it was, “I wouldn’t react that way personally, so it’s sus.”  

Sure, be suspicious because there’s a suspicious death and family members are always suspects until ruled out, but approach it like a cop.  Or at least think about it from more angles than just your own, not terribly similar experience.  You’re a white city cop who can’t (or won’t) adjust to being in BF rural-ville, but these are immigrant shepherds whose family come from a homeland where the cops were just as likely to kill you as answer questions, and you’re side-eying a guy for going to make sure that their meal ticket doesn’t get obliterated?

I need to keep reminding myself that I really did want to like Vic.  I really did.  She just... they don’t make it easy for me.  Maybe she’s serving as an avatar for audience who don’t know about some of the culture stuff, and the audience get answers from her ignorance?  But honestly, I wish they’d picked a different way to handle that, if that’s what they were trying to do.  Her response to Henry being salty about Thanksgiving still really pisses me off.  Because it was shitty and racist, and... do we really need a character basically rolling their eyes and saying, “It was so long ago, why don’t you just get over it,” about something that is intrinsically tied to the genocide of so many people?  Why are Indigenous people just supposed to “get over it” but “Remember the Alamo” and “Southern Pride,” and shit?  Fuck’s sake.  Honestly, that might have been the moment when they lost me on her character.  She has moments where she’s awesome, but they never really address her being fucking racist or give her a chance to grow into a better person.  Which sucks a lot.  Fuck.  Ok, that was a lot.  Sorry.  Back to the actual ep.

AH, nice of you to beam in from the campaign trail, Brancheroo!

Uh, so I paused it to look at pic in the newspaper, and then being me, started to look at the articles surrounding the pic.  And the one with the headline “Fans Injured At Local Game” is actually about the Stewart case?  From 1x3?  I’m guessing that somebody went to the trouble of writing up an article for that for some S1 ep after it and they just plugged it in because when not paused, you might catch “Sheriff Longmire” there and that’s all they need.  Especially since the text starts to repeat after the first paragraph.  (I am the worst pedantic little shit.)  Ooooor, maybe even though it’s S2, it’s hardly been any time since 1x3?  The date on the newspaper is March 31, 2012, so there’s a timeline hint. 

Awwwwww, once Walt points out the bird, Ferg knows exactly what it is.  Occasional twitcher, are we, my lad?  “A red-tip meadowlark,” indeed.  Oh bb; Ferg’s face when he sees Walt looking at the pic of him with Branch in the paper.

“You go too fast, you miss the little things.”  Every once in a while, he actually sort of mentors Ferg.  I wish he did more of that, especially since we see later how capable Ferg can be.

Go suck an egg, Branch.  Why does she get all the “good” assignments?  Maybe because she was actually on the job when they found the body, not campaigning.

OPE.  Lizzie’s gift.  Yeah, I’d probably choke on that coffee if I were you, too, girl.  Better hope that there wasn’t perishable food stuffs in that gift, because that has been in there for a whiiiiiile, hasn’t it.  Wait, was Ferg in the office when Lizzie dropped off the gift?  Because his face said more than just “Did somebody give Vic a present?”  Suuuuper subtle with that whole pushing the drawer closed with your foot there, Vic.  Pfffft.

“Cyrano Caballero”  How daaaare that skeeve take Cyrano’s name in vain?!?!  (I have a thing about Cyrano de Bergerac.  It’s quite possibly my favourite play, and I adore the character, and have exactly 0 chill about it at all.  I find Brian Hooker’s translation of “The Ballade of the duel at the Hotel Bourgogne Between de Bergerac and a Boeotian” with “Then, as I end the refrian, thrust home,” vastly superior to any other translation that I’ve heard or read, though for the rest of it, I will grant that there are others to be preferred.  But that version of his Ballade is exquisite, and I will not be swayed.  Holy shit, FOCUS.  That is so very much not the point.)  It’s not even a throw away line in this ep, it’s just a random, very well chosen, if utterly appallingly insulting, company name.  It’s actually incredibly clever for what the business is, and if it didn’t make me so stomping mad, I would applaud whoever came up with it heartily.

Vic’s face listening to this jackass’ spiel is a thing of beauty.  “A good woman goes a long way of easing the obvious stresses of your daily life,” the jackass says, cutting his eyes at Vic when he says “obvious stresses,” and I caaaackle.

What is it about this guys’ horrible glasses that just makes him so much more hate-able?  I’m not entirely sure, but kudos to whatever costumer put those on him, because they are perfect.  In the ‘I want to punch him’ way of perfection.

And after all of that about Walt’s “lady friend,” Vic brings Lizzie’s present.  Womp womp.  That went super well.  Yuuuup, run while you can.

Poor Ferg.  Branch manipulates him, Vic ignores him, Walt shuts him down...  Poor guy just can’t get a break.

I actually kind of like this motel manager--the one who “doesn’t judge people” and is a stickler for warrants?  At least somebody in this county cares about warrants.  Also, those doors are actually really pretty.  Nice colour, and the carved scrollwork designs are nice.

What an odd shot: the one when they’re coming out of Walt’s office after talking to Skeevy McGrossFace and Rosa.  It’s a weird sort of shaky-cam stepping back, just preceding Branch walking, and then turns to follow him when he sit’s on his desk.  But it’s a really different style of shot than I can remember, so much so that it’s a bit jarring, especially after the series of nearly stationary close ups that we just had.  Weird. [18:42-18-50]

Cady!  I haven’t made much note of her costuming before this, but it seems notable that’s she’s only in monocromatics.  Especially next to Fales in muted tones, but still some colour, and surrounded by the colourful grafitti of the alley where her mother was stabbed.  Nice way of setting her apart from everything.

SHEEPIES!  Ooooo, that wagon is so cool.  Ah dang, the way that Sal corrects Walt’s pronunciation of his brother’s name is so gloriously passive aggressive.  Good for you, my dude.  Names are important, and people should have the respect to make the effort to get them right.

Aaaaaand Walt, the definition of Do, Don’t Tell, just shoves the guy to keep him from drinking the possibly dangerous water, rather than, like, using his words.  Walt’s gonna Walt.

Iiiiiiiii am a mess, truly.  It cuts to an architectural model and I start giggling like a 6th grader, because I know it’s going to be a Jacob scene.  He’s not even on screen yet, ffs.  HANDS.  I’m fine.  Totally fine.  (That’s totally a lie.  I just rewound to the beginning of the scene because I kept giggling too much to pay attention.  What the hell.)  First time we’ve seen one of the chips, which at this point must be a marketing mock-up, since nothing is built yet.  And he actually types, not just doing the hunt-and-peck thing that is sometimes easier on a tablet.

Looking at the weaving that is up on his wall (maybe a rug?) I’m hoping that the prop people actually did buy from Northern Cheyenne artisans.  They apparently did most of their filming in New Mexico, so I hope they made the effort to get the patterns right, and buy from the actual tribe they’re supposed to be portraying, I guess?  And now I��m distracted by the fact that the random hanging light behind Jacob is at a weird angle?  

Look, ever since I realized that the “Hey,” that Jacob does is apparently just A (thanks to it also happening in That Damned Xmas Movie) I am endlessly amused (and charmed) whenever Jacob does it.  I don’t know why it makes me so happy, but it does.  (This is legitimately embarrassing.  How much trouble I am having focusing.  Beyond my normal focus issues, which, as shown above, are already impressive.  Because thiiiiirst.)

“My boys at the lumber yard did just throw you a campaign rally.”  I love how Jacob is basically apparently not just his secret angel-investor, but also a sneaky campaign manager.  Did Branch just think shit like the rally just happened?  He’s not fricking Ferris Bueller; somebody organizes those.  And apparently it’s either Jacob himself, or someone who Jacob appointed to do so.

“I thought you were just a casino developer.”  You have noooo clue, Brancheroo.  “I prefer to remain a silent partner.  White people get nervous when Indians start taking back their land.”  Oooooope.  Especially interesting because there are previsions for the Tribal Council to purchase land to be Tribal land (Section 6 of Article IX of the Tribal Constitution), but this seems more along the lines of personal acquisition.  Though maybe not, because “on the board” doesn’t necessarily equate to being the owner.

The set up of Jacob’s office is so interesting.  Functionally for the show, it’s probably for better shooting angles, so that we can see more of Jacob behind the desk while Branch is sitting in front of it, but from an in-the-verse decorating standpoint, bit’s fascinating.  He has this focal wall with the gorgeous wall hanging, flanked by floor to ceiling window, but instead of having his desk centered on that wall and directly facing the bulk of the room, it’s at an almost 45 degree angle on a huge rug, and it’s so unexpected.  I kind of love it, and want to analyze it for days.  Also worth noting is that pride of place is given to the  Hotamétaneo’o headdress which is on a stand centered in front of the wall hanging.

How fucking tired must Jacob be.  He’s used to Walt... Walting, but then Branch comes in, who he is literally spending his own money to support in his bid for sheriff, and he pulls the same shit of assuming that he’s behind Bad Shit.  And then Branch frames it as “bad P.R,” so he’s there to “discuss it with [him] privately.”  And then basically threatens him with Walt.  I swear.  ...there is something a little amusing about Walt being used as the stick in the carrot and a stick method of negotiating.  He certainly is enough of a blunt object most of the time.

Oh fuck you so much, Branch.  Playing the “can’t give you details about an ongoing investigation” card as though you have some professional or moral leg to stand on after basically blackmailing Jacob with Walt’s vendetta is just such shit.  You don’t get to look down your nose at Jacob’s quid pro quo pragmatism when you were the one who came to him for financial backing.  You sanctimonious little shitheel.  If you didn’t want to deal with Jacob, you shouldn’t have taken his $100k.  He’s a business man, and you’re an investment, and not a quixotic one.

“He’s probably the only person to have died from [hemlock] since Socrates.”  And then Walt’s incredulous look and her, “Alright, I googled it,” were subtle comedic gold.

Ooooooo, that was a nice little shot.  Not quite foreshadowing, but showing Branch’s suspicions and sort of inviting the audience to share them.  Walt says his bit about the Army poisoning “Indian wells” to kill them off and get their land, and then we see Branch fiddling with the Four Arrows chip and narrow his eyes considering and slip the chip into his pocket, looking suspicious.  It’s a really neat little moment of visual storytelling, no lines, literally three seconds long, just sort of snuck in there, but super effective.  Really nicely done.

And again, Cady is in monochromatics.  And, shit, just gave Fales Henry’s name.  Aaaaaand right after, she realizes that the junkie was killed and realizes that it had to have been one of her dads (or so she thinks).

Sal’s monologue in the cell is a good emotional payoff that plays off of Vic’s comments towards the beginning of the episode.  I see the narrative worth of her making them, and how the structure of the episode benefits from it; but seeing those writing elements from the outside of the show doesn’t make me able to like her as a character who said them in-universe.  And then the threat Sal makes of vengeance on someone who killed one he loves also underscores the stuff with Cady’s investigation into her mother’s death very well.  As much as I gripe about the writing *cough S6 cough finale cough* there really is some damn good writing in this show, and I don’t show enough appreciation for it.

Huh, and now there’s a sort of inverse of that weird shot preceding Branch from earlier, but this one is much more effective and less off-putting.  This one [33:00] precedes Walt as he walks back into his office, still a medium close up, but it’s much steadier, and the way it is framed, it does quite a bit to convey his mindset, and he walks out of the shot and we see the three deputies following him in like baffled ducklings, making the shot serve another purpose, too.  Which honestly makes that earlier shaky follow shot of Branch even weirder, because this one was so much better.

And then Walt has his creepy little speech about how someone would want to watch the light go out of their eyes and not caring if you get caught.  I do appreciate that when he’s talking about the psychology of killing with poison he doesn’t just call it a “woman’s method” which media so often does.  It might have been the writers keeping who the killer was abstruse, but it was still more gender neutral.  Especially since according to The U. S. Department of Justice's report on Homicide Trends in the United States (1980 to 2008) of all poison killers in that time period, 60.5 percent were male and 39.5 percent female.  (Table 5 on page 10.)  So that long held idea that even Sherlock Holmes was written to have that poison is “of course” a woman’s weapon is pretty crap.

Awwww, the good old days when Walt paid attention to animals.  ...I am still bizarrely salty about the fact that he never named his horse.  What a good pupper!  

And then we have a classic example of Sneaky!Walt, which always takes people quite by surprise, because he’s usually as subtle as Miley Cyrus.

Also because when he does this, it tends to be pretty fucked up, in a Make Someone Think They’re About To Die way.  And then he does His Thing, where he just lays out all of his suppositions, with no proof, only the terror of her thinking that she’s been poisoned and you’re withholding medical intervention to get her to confess.  And is, irritatingly, correct about his theories.  But I’m pretty sure this qualifies as coercing a confession?  She thinks she’s fucking dying.  Even Vic looks at him like it’s fucked up, and her moral compass where he’s concerned is... skewed.

They way this reveal was played out, (”How’d they find her so fast?”  “Hard to say...”) is somewhat ambiguous as to whether it’s supposed to be that Branch went there to tell Jacob or not, but I kind of doubt it?  I kind of figure that the meeting that Jacob was having when Branch rambled in was already with Rosa signing the paperwork.  Jacob is smart.  So, HAH.  Little good your “can’t comment on an ongoing investigation” schtick did.

And then the news that someone in law enforcement has been asking after Henry.

“Lizzie was waiting for you here tonight.  You should talk to her, Walt.  She seems to think she is in a relationship with you.”  ....omgs.  The tone.  I mean, yes, the blisteringly glorious SASS, but how does one not read that as incredibly shippy?  Howwwww?

“You are an honest man, Walt.  I would like you to stay that way.”  Oh Henry.  When did you decide that you weren’t?  Was it when you hired Hector?  Or was there something before?  ...I feel like there were things before that.  Hello darkness my old friend.

“It is not your job to protect me.”  “It is my job...”  THOSE WERE THE DAYS.  Those were the fucking daaaaaays.  And the emotions on Henry’s face after Walt says, “That was my right,” as though Henry cheated him of something.  I am so deep in OT3 feels I cannot even see daylight here.  The feels of them having been an OT3 and then Walt pulling this shit, and Henry having to defend his own “right” to avenge Martha?  It wrecks me.  “A good woman was murdered.  A bad man is dead.  End of story.”  

[smilepal]

🏀 🍏 🌸 boop :3

Ask memes for @saintsofvoid :3

🏀--Does your OC have any skills that people wouldn’t expect them to have? Do they have a hobby or pass time that others would consider strange or weird? How did they learn this particular skill or pick up this hobby?

Hiro is a surprisingly talented baker. He obviously never had much time for it before he left the Tyger Claws, or the opportunity to do something he’d consider so frivolous, but he picked it up from Mama Welles after he met Jackie. For the fact that he’s still pretty nervous cooking, he’s actually a decent baker, and enjoys how much he can tune everything else out while he’s doing it. He rarely bakes for himself, seeing it as something that isn’t necessarily worth the cost of supplies/the time commitment, but if there was even an inkling that someone else would appreciate it—they’d be quick to find some sort of homemade treat waiting for them when they least expect it—and as he’d be quick to point out—he looks damn cute in an apron. Most of his hobbies are pretty normal—dancing, boxing, rock climbing, and usually fairly physical. He’s been dancing for a long time, but the boxing he picked up from Jackie/Viktor, and the rock climbing from Victory. He also loves to race bikes and this is a definitely a hold-over from his TC days. It’s not necessarily a weird hobby, but people usually don’t expect him to like clothing/shopping as much as he does—and it’s usually where a lot of his extra income disappears to (well that and expensive stuff for his hair.)

🍏--When your OC says “I had a bad day” what does that tend to mean? Is it really as bad as they’re saying or are they being a bit dramatic?

“I had a bad day” is exactly what it sounds like when Hiro says it–usually some gig went ass-up, or a client/fixer was being awful, and he’ll probably vent about it for a bit, and then wander off to go cool down–maybe work on his guns or take a shower or go for a bike ride. If it’s really bad he’ll go to Vics and borrow one of his bags/spar until he’s tired himself out. He tries not to take his bad days out/verbalize them on his partners/friends so he usually goes and tries to burn off any of that energy and come back when he’s cooled off a bit/stuff isn’t bothering him as much anymore. If a day has gone seriously sideways, or something really bad happened, he usually won’t say much at all and will probably go and hide with the door shut for a bit, or just dump his stuff at home and leave again. If it’s that bad, he’s almost guarenteed not to want to talk about it.

🌸--What’s a sentence that would make your OC’s day better? One that would make them laugh? One that would make their day worse? Why? What words would you have to say to them to completely ruin their day?

Sentences that could make a day better? “I made coffee, here let me get some for you–or "want to go for a walk later, maybe grab food after?” Quality time means a lot to him, or just when people actually think of him. He never expects it, so it’s something that still surprises him–and he really appreciates it. Something that makes him laugh? Usually it’s less words, and more actions–but his banter/playful fighting with Johnny usually ends in someone laughing. They usually don’t take it super seriously–just don’t let them roughhouse indoors–their kitchen table still has a dent in it, and neither of them will own up to it. Usually things that would make a day worse, are anything to do with work not going the way it should–“your client is a Corpo,” “they’re refusing to pay,” “oh there’s a part we conveniently didn’t tell you”–stuff like that. He likes knowing what to expect from a given job, and people changing the parameters or trying to deliberate hide, or just omiting important stuff really irritates him. Things that usually ruin his day are anything do with the Tyger Claws–particularly if they’re a threat to Johnny/V, or just having to be the person to bail them out of really stupid situations. He’d be the first person there to help every time, but even he on occasion does lose his temper, usually because they’ve worried/scared him.

Thanks for asking!! 🥰🥰

[doof-doofblog]

"If You Don't Get A Move On You're Going To Miss It!"

Monday 10th May 2021

Hello again folks! I'm back again with another post. I just want to recap on Thursday's and Friday's episode and applaud the phenomenal performance from Lorraine Stanley! Her portrayal of Karen Taylor has been absolutely stunning and powerful over the last few weeks during Bailey's disappearance and during the aftermath of her losing her job at the laundrette. I do also want to mention how the community and neighbours rallied round her to support their friend and neighbour in their time of need. I found completely touching and was overwhelmingly powerful.

But regarding this week, it's the week the majority of us have all been waiting for since Ben and Callum got engaged! This is the week of the highly anticipated Ballum wedding! Now the big question is, will Ben meet Callum at the alter after he's learnt the truth about him being a grass! (From what the new trailer is to go by, Ben does actually decide to marry Callum) - but oh my goodness, it looks like we're in for some super dramatic scenes this week! For those of you who haven't seen the trailer yet, where have you been? Gray is once manipulating Whitney in to believing that the Mitchell's (particularly Ben) are to blame for Kush's death.

But as Whitney’s grief gets the better of her, she takes it into her own hands to deal with the Mitchell's once and for all, taking a pair of keys, getting into a car and heading straight for them. As this is happening, Phil happens to have learnt the truth about Callum grassing up his family and is eager to have a confrontation with Callum himself, but as Kat tries her best to stop Phil from making a huge mistake - Phil, Callum, Ben and Kat all get caught in the headlights of Whitney's car - who will she hit? And will they be okay?! - I know a few are speculating that it could be Callum or Ben who gets hit, or even Whitney herself getting hurt, but honestly - my biggest fear is Phil getting hurt. Don't get me wrong I love all these characters to appear to be in the frame, but I would be immensely heartbroken if it was Phil to get hurt and possibly be killed off? Hopefully none of them will get killed off - but what are your predictions? I'd love to hear your thoughts on this one!

--

So looking at Monday's episode and of course it's all about Ballum!!! But before we focus on the main event I'm going to mention Bailey. Sadly she is still sleeping rough after running away from home. The only company she has is her dog Banjo (who can I just say is the most adorable dog that EastEnders has had for a very long time!) It appears that the only bit of food she has available is a packet of biscuits and of course being a hungry puppo, Banjo longingly stares at Bailey for the biscuit she's about to eat. Bailey willingly gives Banjo the biscuit, but as she begins to gather her things together and move along, a bunch of youths rob her only bag of belongings. Being the hero, Banjo quickly chases after them as Bailey following along behind.

However, meanwhile on the Square as Keegan and Bernie continue to search for Bailey and begin to discuss their concerns about where they're going to find her. Bernie tries to keep positive, informing her brother that Bailey will be found and eventually their luck will change. Of course Keegan is doubtful, but of course we know that Bernadette has offered to be Stuart & Rainie's surrogate, so eventually she will come into some money for the family, but it'll be interesting once her family find out. I'm intrigued on how Keegan is going to react - considering that it was his wife who originally agreed to be their surrogate, now it's his sister!

As Bernie takes her leave, the next thing we see is little Banjo running towards the Square, however the poor little doggo is covered in blood. Keegan understandably relieved to see Banjo, but as soon as he sees the blood coming from the family pet, he begins to question where Bailey is. As Bailey continues her search for her beloved dog, she stumbles across an elderly man named Reg claiming to be a friend of her parents, Mitch and Dinah. Could Bailey perhaps be in danger or is this gentleman genuinely who he says he is?!

--

Elsewhere on the Square, Linda appears to be concerned for Nancy's whereabouts. She reveals that Nancy didn't come the previous evening, even though Mick seems more calmer about the situation, he tries to reassure Linda that Nancy had probably just stayed at a friend's house and would most likely be home by lunchtime, however unbeknown to them, poor Nancy had actually kipped in the gym overnight. It seems that things have gotten that bad between Nancy and her Mum, she could no longer bare to stay in the Vic overnight. As Sharon finds her as she opens up the gym, Nancy promises it's not going to be a long-term thing.

I guess Sharon kind of sympathises with Nancy as she too has felt the raff of Linda, but of course Sharon could be possibly using Nancy to get back into Linda's good books? She offers Nancy to use her shower back at her place and willingly gives her the keys to her apartment. Unfortunately, this is where Nancy once again passes ways with Zack and his awful flirtation. Sorry, but it is a bit cringe-worthy! Zack smooth talks his way with Nancy, claiming that once she's done in the shower he'll treat her to some breakfast!

I have to say I love Nancy's lack of enthusiasm, well I guess you could call it sarcasm also! Honestly though, how would you feel if Zack and Nancy were to become a new couple? I'm not sure how I'd feel about it, as much as I love Nancy, I haven't really made my mind up yet on Zack, I think we need to see a bit of him before I can make a decision. Anyway, they both end up in Ruby's club and Zack is once again flirtatious and eager to get a second date with Nancy, even though she even states that this is anything but a date! As she mentions how she's currently stuck in a ruckus with her Mum, she frets about not even being able to brush her teeth properly as she hasn't got a tooth brush, plus she wants to avoid going home to fetch her one and be confronted by her Mum yet again.

I think in an attempt to win Nancy round he promises that somehow, someway he will make all her problems disappear, but she scoffs at his claim and heads towards to the bar to grab some snacks. But while she's not looking Zack sneaks off and eventually finds himself in the Vic, nosing through all the Carter's belongings, is he simply just trying to find Nancy's toothbrush for her, or perhaps something else? Unfortunately his search doesn't last very long as he's walloped over the head with a frying pan by Linda! Almost like a scene from the Disney movie Tangled!

--

Right focusing on the main story at hand, as Callum and Stuart prepare themselves for the wedding, Callum voices his concern as to whether Ben will truly show up to their wedding. Stuart also voices his concern as to whether his brother should actually go, he can't bare to picture his young brother being left stood up at the alter. But the interesting thing is on the other side of the Square, as Kathy and Phil are discussing the wedding and the fact that Ben would be making a huge mistake if he didn't turn up, Ben is sat on the stairs in the hallway listening to their every word.

Kathy is all dressed up in her wonderful wedding outfit and of course little Lexi looks beautiful in her bridesmaid dress, rehearsing her steps for the wedding ceremony. Phil informs Kathy that Ben is adamant that the wedding is off, but Kathy urges the Father of their son to talk Ben round and make him see sense! Eventually as everyone gathers in the Vic waiting for Ben to show his face, Phil appears all dressed up his suit and breaks the news that Ben has gone missing, he's simply left his suit on his bed and disappeared, much to the family's shock.

While all this chaos appears to be happening in the middle of the Square, poor Callum and Stuart have made it to the register's office and are waiting anxiously for Ben's arrival! As they hear someone bursting through the doors, they look with hope and desperation, but it appears to be Jay. But as much as Callum is happy to see him, Jay gives him the devastating news that Ben has gone AWOL and no one can find him anywhere. Eager to make sure that his brother marries the man he loves, Stuart takes it upon himself to go back to the Square and find Ben and bring him to Callum.

Although it appears that Phil has managed to find Ben before he can. Phil eventually finds his son in the Arches working away on a car, almost as if he's trying to avoid the day itself and carry on as normal. Phil tries once again to reassure his son that marrying Callum would be the best thing he's ever done, even admitting that it took him a long time to come round - this moment really touched me - but also claiming that if Ben was to marry Callum today, it would Phil the proudest he has ever been of his son. I have to say those words really moved me, and to be honest I think it moved Ben - almost to the point where it nearly broke him and he almost revealed what Callum had done.

Ben gets so overcome with emotion, tears are slowly falling from his eyes. He almost breaks as he informs his Dad that Callum had betrayed him, all of them! Phil looks to his son with confusion in his eyes. What does he mean, all of them? But Ben stops in his tracks and makes up the excuse that Callum actually cheated on him. Although it seems as though Phil doesn't believe this explanation, he takes it on the chin and leaves Ben to it. However, once he's back on the Square he comes face-to-face with Stuart ... now this is where everything goes completely wrong! Of course Stuart has no idea what's been happening on the Square, he's just concerned about his little brother waiting at the alter for the man he loves.

As they cross paths, Stuart pleads Phil to inform her where Ben has got to, but Phil seems eager to defend his son after the explanation he's been given, as soon as Phil mentions that he welcomed Callum into the family, Stuart completely gets the wrong end of the stick and reveals everything. Claiming that Callum never wanted to go undercover, claiming that all he did it for was for Ben, putting his career on the line for Ben, even if it meant going behind Phil's back and reporting everything to the police. But you can see from the look in Phil's face that this is all news to him and this is the first he's hearing about Callum's betrayal. Once Stuart realises his mistake he warns that if Phil ever lays a finger on Callum he will come back and kill him!

Returning to the Arches, Ben is once again alone with his thoughts, is he questioning himself whether he should marry Callum? But it seems like another visit from a little lady changes his mind. Lexi finds him in the Arches and comments that it's the same place she finds him every time when Ben decides to take some time on his own. Now this moment I absolutely loved, Lexi questions her Father about love, What does it mean? What's it all about? She claims that she doesn't believe in love, considering that her Mum has had 3 different boyfriends since she's been home and her Grandparents have been married "300 times!". Her exaggerations make Ben giggle, but he tries to reassure his daughter that she should believe in love, because it's the one thing in life that you can't describe the feeling of. It can hurt but it's also wonderful too to be in love. He claims that being with that one person who trusts you and believes in you is the best feeling in the world and with them by your side, you face the world together, forever. As he explains all this to his daughter, she then asks the very important question, "Then why aren't you marrying Callum?"

Listening to his own words and realising that it's been his daughter who's made him see sense, Ben rushes to the wedding reception. As the guests almost sit themselves up and get ready to leave as they believe Ben isn't showing up, Stuart arrives back at the wedding reception eager to inform his brother about what's happened on the Square between him and Phil. But before Stuart can begin to explain himself, both Lexi and Ben burst through the door just in time for the ceremony, to Callum's absolute happiness and relief.  

Only unbeknown to them, back at home, Phil is seen listening to a voice message from Kathy, informing him that the wedding appears to be back on. Ben has arrived at the wedding reception and she urges him to get there before he misses his son getting married. As the voice message ends, Phil notices a picture of Callum on the shelf, all dressed up smartly in his police uniform. Reeling from the news he's learnt from Stuart, he smashes Callum's picture to pieces. What is Phil going to do now?

--

I know there's been a major event happen in this evening's episode of EastEnders, but unfortunately I am one episode behind, so I will review tonight's episode tomorrow instead. I know what's happened but I'm not to comment until tomorrow. Either way, I'm looking forward to witnessing what happens next. Thank you again for reading, I hope you've all enjoyed my post! I'll be back again tomorrow with everything regarding the Ballum wedding and much more! Enjoy the rest of your evening folks! Love you all xXx

[xumos-hoe]

Heyyyyyyyyy heard you were doin some.... requests 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 May I get headcanons on how all the boys would react to MC who wakes up in the middle of the night in excruciating pain because of her period? That shit happens to me EvErY TiMe and I need some fluff and maybe (most def) panicked bois 😩🥺🤭🥵

OK I JUST WANNA SAY I WISHHHHH I GOT MY PERIOD DURING THE NIGHT UGH. It always comes during the day at work or school and it fucking sucks :(((

Hope you enjoy babe💕

MLQC crew react to MC waking up w/ period pains

~~~~~~~~

Victor

The first thing he noticed was that it was a little colder than usual from where you had taken all the blankets. That, and you kept shifting around.

He didn’t think much of it until low whimpering and groaning made its way into his ears, and Vic was ALERT.

He turned to find you on the complete opposite side of the bed, curled up and rocking side-to-side as the whimpering became louder and louder. You were sniffling a bit too.

It seemed like you were holding something close to your abdomen—a heating pad—and it didn’t take much longer for Vic to put two-and-two together.

“MC?”

He fought against reaching out a hand in case you didn’t want to be touched. “MC? Are you alright?”

You shook your head slowly. An unspoken no. He knew better than to leave you, so the first thing Vic did was scoot a little closer before placing a gentle hand over your shoulder.

“Tell me...do you need anything?”

You paused briefly before answering with a tentative voice; sounding pained and even a little breathless.

“Last night’s soup would be nice...”

He laughs quietly and you already feel him shuffling out of bed. “Even under these circumstances, you still think about food.”

It isn’t long before he returns with a tray of steaming soup, a glass of water, and painkillers neatly tucked in a napkin. He presses a kiss to your forehead before returning to his side of the bed as he watches you eat.

Every once in a while, he asks how you’re feeling now that the painkillers have made their way into your system. And although it’s too dark to tell, you catch a bit of relief in his expression when you assure him that the pain has gone down.

When you’ve finished your little midnight snack and found a comfortable position in bed, you welcome Victor’s arms with a full heart as he cradles you back to sleep, whispering sweet nothings. You nearly forget the pain altogether.

Lucien

Sudden movements disturb the professor from his sleep.

The mattress shifts abruptly when you sit up slowly and clutch your lower abdomen as a horrible ache begins working it’s way through your system.

You gasp aloud as the ache becomes sharper and more intense, eventually waking Lucien. He rises slowly before leaning on one arm, watching your movements in confusion until complete understanding crosses his features.

Lucien is on his feet before you know it, and you hardly need to question whether or not he actually knew what was going on this is Mr. PhD we’re talking about, because soon enough, he’s on your side of the bed with just one question.

“Can you stand on your own?”

You bite down on your lower lip to stifle a whimper before nodding—but even that doesn’t stop him from wrapping an arm around your shoulders and lifting you gently from the sheets towards the bathroom.

He presses a chaste kiss to your temple and switches the lights on. “Get cleaned up, okay?”

And as you dealt with the cleanup process, Lucien had already switched out the sheets that you may or may not have bled on, laying a fresh towel on your side of the bed, and placing a glass of water and painkillers on the nightstand. He even prepared a warm water bottle!

how he managed all of this in such a small amount of time, don’t ask

You feel a little emotional seeing it all when you get back, though that might have something to do with your hormones, but truthfully—who wouldn’t? And especially at 3 in the morning with a boyfriend who’s already so alert and prepared...

The first thing Lucien does when you slip back into bed, wincing as another wave of cramps practically obliterates your insides, is drape an arm across your pillow and pull you into a gentle embrace with the second kiss of the night. He adjusts the position of the warm water bottle to your liking, all the while watching attentively in case you showed too much pain.

For the rest of the night, and well into the morning, he holds you—and despite the pain, you wish that things could stay like this for a little while longer.

Kiro

Well. Kiro doesn’t wake up right away like the others two.

When sunshine boi falls asleep, it’s deep af.

But when he makes out the first round of crying and soft groaning, his eyes finally open. And although he’s still a little hazy from his sleep, he’s alert enough.

It takes him a few seconds to realize that you’re the source of the not-so-happy sounds. He also notices you’re not asleep in his arms anymore, because some time earlier, you had to slip out and quickly find something to prevent the bleeding from staining anything else besides your pjs.

It’s you that sounds in pain—and oh boy, if Kiro wasn’t awake before, he’s definitely awake now. You’re nearly startled at how quickly he flips over to look at you, no denying the urgency in his voice

“Hey, hey! Miss Chips! What’s wrong??”

You clutch your tummy painfully and manage out a small “period” hoping by some miracle, he heard and understood your circumstances.

Thank goodness he did, because Kiro’s arms are tucked snugly around you in mere seconds.

“Ah damn...” He sounds frustrated and you feel his hand settle over yours. “Are you...in a lot of pain..?”

He feels you nod against him before you make another pained sound. It’s silent for a few moments, and you think it’s almost bearable with him wrapped around you like this, until he speaks up again.

“I-I’ll be back in just a second... can you wait for me?“

The last thing you want to do is let go of him amid all the pain. He pulls away almost hesitantly before bolting out of the bed and out the door of the bedroom.

Theres clattering in the kitchen. Rapid footsteps. Something...crashing? And some more footsteps, running down the hall with the plastic squeaking of a snack bag and the distant gurgle of contained water.

Kiro enters with exactly what you thought he would—your favorite snacks, painkillers, and a heated water bottle. You want to smile and say something but the excruciating cramps stop you.

He walks over and switches on the lamp before neatly setting everything on the bed. You reach almost instinctively for the snacks, because damn potato chips sounded amazing, but Kiro stopped you before you could even touch the bag.

“Take some pills first.”

The heated water bottle felt heavenly against your tummy, and the snacks just about hit all the right places; with the painkillers doing a quick job of taming the pain and your boyfriend by your side to bear through it all, you were grateful—

To say the least.

Gavin

As much as you tried to be quiet about; all the shifting and miserable sounds were enough to wake up birdcop.

He knew you’d gotten out of bed earlier and heard the bathroom door shut a little too loudly—that’s what really had woken him, but sometime afterwards, he drifted back to sleep.

And now he was awake again.

Your quiet voice called out to him in the darkness, unusually low and there was a brief sound at the end that told him something wasn’t right.

“Gav?...Gavin? Are you awake?”

From his stretching and yawning just moments earlier, you were pretty sure he was. And in your current state, it was too painful to get up and retrieve a heating pad alone. You felt bad to assume he might be awake...but...

“Yeah, I’m up—what’s the matter? What’s wrong?”

You came face to face with Gavin, who was still rubbing the sleep from his eyes. Hurriedly, of course—you knew when your boyfriend was concerned about something.

His gaze almost turned bewildered when you opened your mouth to say something, but all that emerged was a small gasp and you squeezed your eyes shut, as one of the worst cramps (so far) came over you.

He scooted closer with a hesitant hand outstretched, unsure of where to place it or what to say.

“MC...? Hey MC, talk to me—are you alright?”

All that nervousness and panic melted away when you finally explained that it was the time of the month again and the cramps were being a little extra cruel. Gavin’s expression softened an instant, but still, there was that trace of concern in his features.

His hands moved exactly where you wanted them most, filled with all the warmth and reassurement needed to get you through the night. But he didn’t stop there—soothing, circular motions made their way across your tummy, warming the pain away.

Not entirely. But significantly enough that you managed to ease into his arms and sigh a breath of exhaustion. Gavin’s hands were still at work, even as you felt your eyes becoming heavier and almost didn’t catch the kiss that landed itself atop your head.

“Try to sleep—I’m right here so don’t worry...”

And even in the morning, you found Gavin’s hand lying still over your tummy and his entire body cuddling yours close. Just as you knew it would be.

[shinycorvidae]

Head Cannon Dump Part 4 of 6

The two Vs, NV/Vic/V Part 1: Physicality and Personality

-NV is Vic, my V, a nomad

-Hiro or SKV, her roommate, then friend, then lover, Street kid background (vaguely), hes @smilepal s

Basic/Physical:

She's 28, at game start

Half Cuban, half white and has lived in a desert for most of her life so she has warm brown tanned skin. Warm yellow/brown eyes which can look piercingly through you or soft and understanding depending on her mood.

Her hair is a blue color with a tinge of green. It was supposed to be a forest green but her sister grabbed the wrong bottle of perma-dye when they broke into the local ripperdoc's clinic to dye their hair.

Her lips are also permanently colored. She likens it to war paint but she doesn't want the hassle of applying it/worrying about it rubbing off.

Ex-nomad, sleeps like the dead anywhere because she's used to having people around to watch her back

Her bones crack like fucking glow sticks.

-Johnny: how are your bones in worse condition than mine were?? I was in my 30s?

-Vic *just finger guns*

Vic sleeps like an idiot, all contorted and sideways

-Hiro tries to push her back into a normal situation so she doesn’t wake up with her back hurting more than usual.

Has a snake tattoo snaking around her chest for Viper, got it with funds from the first mission with Jackie. She also has a devils head and Chippin' In lyrics on her back from her teen years.

V really didnt want to admit to Johnny that she was a samurai fan so she goes out of her way to not look at her back while hes in her head. "Who? Is that some bushido reenactment shit?"

This goes well until Johnny has control of her body and goes to the bathroom to check on her ribs, thinking he broke them.

-J: "I know, Vic."

-Nv: "What?"

-J: I know about your secret."

-Nv: "Ehehe secret? Wha-"

-J: "I SAW YOUR BACK V"

-Nv: "oh fu-"

-J: "BUSHIDO REENACTMENT MY ASS."

Pansexual.

She has a pair of mantis blades, which are basically a safety blanket for her, weapons that can't ever be taken away so she's never helpless. So when she's nervous/feeling helpless she runs her fingers over the seam of them.

They’re her weapon of last resort though so if you find her at home cleaning the blood off them, you know a mission went fucking sideways

They were her dad, Michael's, which he got from the army so they're military issue high end suckers. Also around 50 years old lmao.

They make Vik weep because finding replacement parts is impossible

V only smokes the occasional joint and gets drunk once in a blue moon. She's managed to avoid smoking completely and is pissed that Johnny tried to sabotage that.

“She gives him the occasional cigarettes "as a treat"

"Aww Johnny you were actually a decent human being, here have a cigarette"

"I'm not a fucking cat V"

"Just say thank you, Dickhead"

"Fuck off"

"Love you too"

Has a bullet wound scar on her thigh which is covered up with a simple black band tattoo. Her only other significant scars are some on her chest from a motorcycle crash as a 16 year old. She's always had decent access to a ripper doc so while she's been injured a lot, she doesn't have many scars

Personality:

V is a sweetheart. She honestly believes the best of everyone. She grew up in a nomad community where everyone worked together for the good of everyone, and kind of expects the same of everyone in night city.

She continues to trust people blindly, despite being burned a couple times. She has faith in herself to be able to fight her way out of a bad situation should she get backstabbed, so shed rather bet on people being generally good.

Life can be rough in the badlands. Resources are scarce. Vic learned how to conserve resources from a young age. Shes frugal with her money, hoards anything that might be useful, and is really into reusing/recycling things. Shes brought Hiro cyberware she pulled out of dead bodies and is generally handing with mechanical fixes.

This also applies to food. When youve had days were literally the only thing you had to eat that day were some dusty grasshoppers you managed to forage, your standards for food fall drastically.

This drives Hiro and Johnny nuts who often have to stop her from eating random/possibly poisoned food.

The fact that shes a blindly trusting person just amplifies this.

*V walking in with a plate of cookies*

"..whats that V?"

-Nv: "Oh hey, the neighbor gave me these cookies! Want some?"

*Johnny and Hiro who both know you shouldn't accept random food from strangers in Night City, immediately disposing of them.*

-Nv: "What a waste of food :("

-H: "HOW MANY DID YOU EAT?"

-J: "How did you live before us?!"

-H: "Jackie. It was definitely Jackie, the Saint."

-...Not very long later,

"we see you V, don't eat those out of the bin"

-Nv:" :("

She's very secure in her sexuality, a naturally attractive and sexual person. Her clan had very little sexual stigma at all, its hard to have any shame over sex when there's only tents without soundproof walls. Her whole clan was definitely also very into free love/poly/open relationships, to the point were most kids didn't know who their parents were and were raised communally. Having sex was just a platonic thing that just sort of happened.

-Nv: “It’s hard to get all embarrassed about privacy when you grew up in a place with only tent walls. It’s just sex.

-SKv: “V, you blush and get tongue-tied whenever the hot neighbor even vaguely looks your way.

-NV: “WELL I didn’t normally have to ASK for sex, it just kinda happened and flirting is HARD, AND YOU NIGHT CITY RESIDENTS ARE ALL SNEAKY ABOUT IT”

Shes used to having sex with her platonic friends, her first couple of one night stands in NC were just an absolute mess--then she tried to sleep with Jackie which went predictably well.

-NV: “Do you want to have sex?”

-Jackie: *Chokes on his tequila. “What?! I’m with Misty??”

-NV: “...and?”

-Jackie: “I mean...I mean you never gave any signs?!

-NV: “Signs??”

-Jackie: “Hermana, most people in NC don’t just sleep with their friends. I mean. They do. But they don’t. It’s complicated.”

-NV: “Obviously.”

Considering that, V is. HORRID. at flirting in Night City. She's never really had to do that kind of verbal dance before and a lot of come on/innuendo goes over her head. She also has zero body shame and often walks around their apartment naked and will change nonchalantly in public.

-Nv: *Noticing people staring at her at the club and going into work mode*

-Hiro: *Noticing Nv counting the exits*

"what's wrong?"

-Nv: "That man's staring at me. Maybe he's Arasaka."

-Hiro: "He's staring at your ass, V."

-Nv: "Oh."

Definitely has the occasional “why the fuck didn’t you just say so?!” moments with the boys

*Cue SKv trying to be seductive all day, dropping things and bending over to get them all slow, changing in the living room/working out shirtless, ect. Nv is appreciative but she doesn’t really do anything, and by the end of the day*

-SKv: “For the love of god JUST FUCK ME ALREADY”

-Nv: “What? Alright, geeze all you had to do was ask.”

As trusting as V is, she's an amazing soldier. Her ex military father has been training her to kill people and protect their clan since she was six. She killed her first human at 9 years old.

Due to this while she is a friendly, happy person when she's in a fight or during a mission, she becomes a cold and calculated person, all emotion wiping from her face. She makes quick, decisive decisions, cutting her enemies down at the knees before they have a chance to fight back.

She's a brutal shot with her sniper rifle, knows her way around precision rifle and is deadly with knives both as a close range and throwing weapon.

Vic has a tactical brain/training and is always planning. Its instinct by now. Planning the exits to a room, the quickest way to take down any possible assailants, an enemys open weak points. She takes pride in her skills as a soldier as she sees it as her way of protecting/providing for her family.

As outgoing a person she is she sometimes goes too far when in 'work mode' and needs Hiro to be her moral compass/pull her back.

Her ways of tackling missions is finding a snipers nest and waiting patiently until the perfect moment presents itself, no longer how long that takes. Plus a healthy dose of stealth and pinpoint accuracy.

It takes a lot to push her to revenge but if you threaten her family, she will pick you, your backup, adult (v doesnt touch kids.) family and resources apart methodically, patiently and brutally until your the last one standing. Then she will let you stew, waiting for her final shot. It could come immediately, a week later or even a month

[call-me-rei]

Chapter 29

“I hear voices in my head; they say leave you alone.”

---

I woke up the next afternoon to a doctor checking my vitals. She smiled at me when she noticed my eyes were open.

“Hello Kellin; I’m Doctor Smith. How are you feeling?”

“Dizzy,” I answered.

“That’s probably the anesthesia wearing off. If it continues past an hour call a nurse and we’ll get you checked out.” I nodded. “The surgery went well. We got in and reconnected the bone that broke. Let’s just make sure your nerves are still in tact.”

She had me wiggle my fingers and make and release a fist. She smiled once I completed her little tasks.

“Wonderful, you did great! I’ll be back later to set your arm up in a stronger cast. Until then, take it easy.” I assured her I would, then she left.

It was incredibly lonely in that room after she was gone. I didn’t have my phone; Rick broke it when he attacked me. I couldn’t call or text anyone, not that I really wanted to. The only other person in the world who knew I was in that room was Vic and he was the person I wanted to talk to most.

I groaned when I thought about him. I was still reeling from yesterday’s events. It was amazing how he flipped the switch the way he did. One minute he was sweet and comforting and the next he pushed me away like I was nothing. I still didn’t know why, not that he would tell me anyway. That just left me wondering what I did wrong.

I didn’t have much more time to worry because the door opened again. I held my breath, hoping it was him. My face dropped when I saw it wasn’t.

“Well damn, don’t get too excited.”

“Sorry,” I said sheepishly. “I was just hoping for someone else.”

“I could tell,” Lynn said with a chuckle. I gestured her over to the chair next to my bed.

“What brings you here, Gunn?”

“Well, you weren’t at school yesterday or today, and you didn’t answer my texts. I went by your house and saw all the broken windows. I talked to a neighbor and they said you and your mom were here.”

I sighed. It was bad enough that our neighbors knew about what happened but now that information was getting around. It wouldn’t be long before it got to the school. I started to dread having to go back to that place.

“So what happened at your house? How’d you end up here?”

I let out a small groan before sucking it up and biting the bullet. I told Lynn the story, including the FaceTime with Vic which led him to calling the cops. It was hard to relive all the events that transpired four days ago, but Lynn stayed silent as I went through a rollercoaster of emotions. I had tears streaming down my face when I was done.

“I’m so sorry, Kells,” she said in a hushed tone. She held my hand after she got me some tissues.

“Thanks,” I murmured. “I’m just glad Mom and I are alive.”

She nodded. “Me too. Thank God you and Vic were talking or else who knows what would’ve happened.”

I sighed at the mention of him. “Yeah.”

She noticed my change in mood and changed the subject. “So has anyone else come to visit or have you been here alone all this time?” I gulped. So much for not wanting to think about you-know-who.

Lynn scowled at my expression. “Okay, what’s up?” she asked. I sighed. I knew I couldn’t get out of telling her about it. I once again spilled my guts.

“He rejected me,” I said quietly.

“Vic did?” I nodded. “How?”

I focused my eyes on my fingers playing with a loose thread on the blanket that was over me. That was easier than looking at her when I spoke. “Vic apparently was with me for the two days I was passed out.”

She beamed. “Oh my gosh! That’s so cute!” Her smiled dropped when she noticed the look on my face. “It’s not cute?”

“No, it is, but what happened after isn’t.” She nodded, urging me to continue.

“I woke up and everting was fine. We were talking and he caught me up on everything that happened. We were doing okay. Then I went to hold his hand and he moved away. And then he left the room when the doctor came. When he came back he packed up his stuff and left. He said he didn’t know if he’d come back and see me. He was being so cold.” I sniffed. I didn’t know I’d be that upset about it, but there I was. My heart was breaking at the idea that I made him leave.

“Oh Kells.”

“I’m sure he saw me in this bed all hurt and decided I wasn’t worth his time anymore. I don’t really blame him.” I mumbled the last part, but Lynn still heard me.

“Don’t you dare say that! It’s his loss, not yours.” I nodded, but not to show her I believed her.

“Besides,” she continued, “he was here for two days. He was the one who called the cops and went to your house to check on you. He stayed by your side when you were unconscious and when you went into surgery. Hell, I’m sure he would’ve stayed longer if you were still out cold.”

“Then why’d he push me away?”

Lynn chewed on her lip in thought. I watched her; her brow furrowed as she concentrated on whatever was going through her head. “You said he left when the doctor came in?” I nodded. She hummed. “That’s strange. He was here this whole time and then he left? What happened before the doc came in?”

I thought back. “He was playing with my fingers and I went to hold his hand. Then the door opened and he took his hand away.” I sighed. It still wasn’t fun talking about it. Why did she insist on talking about it?

Another hum came from Lynn’s pursed lips. “Kellin…,” she trailed off. I tilted my head to the side to tell her to continue. “Do you…know if Vic is…” She paused.

“Is what?” I asked after too many moments of silence.

“Out?” I furrowed my brows. “Okay, listen,” she started, “it would make sense that he took his hand away when someone walked in. Maybe he’s not out yet and isn’t comfortable showing that he’s attracted to guys. Either that or he hates PDA.”

“That can’t be right,” I muttered to myself.

“It would make sense. I mean, he’s only affectionate with you when you guys are alone. That date he took you on was somewhere that no other person would think to go, maybe because he didn’t want to get caught. I’m not trying to say that he’s ashamed of you, but…”

I nodded in understanding. Could Vic still be in the closet? I tried piecing together everything I’d heard about him since I started school. Lynn and the others had told me various things about various girls. He was a player, but maybe that was a cover-up?

“Wait!” I exclaimed when I remembered a rumor I’d heard. “You told me there might’ve been something with Alex.”

Lynn chewed on her lip in thought. “Oh yeah, I did.”

“So maybe that means he is out?”

“Well…” Her eyes were fixed forward, almost gazing off.

“Gunn?”

She shook her head. “Sorry, I was just thinking.” I hummed. “I know I told you there was a rumor about him and Alex, but he shut that down really quickly. Like, the speed of light quickly. All the other rumors about the different girls have been going around our school for years. He’s not interested in stopping those.”

I didn’t know what she was getting at. “Meaning?”

“This is just a hunch, but I think that he stopped those Alex rumors to keep everyone from finding out that he likes guys. I’m not sure; he just seems like the type of guy who would do something like that.”

I considered what she was saying and went through my moments with Vic. Our date and our little moments before it. The sweetest moments with him did always happen when no one was around. When people were around he was so dismissive. I always assumed it was because he wanted to keep up his reputation. Well, maybe I wasn’t too far off with that thought.

“I didn’t mean to put all that on you like that,” Lynn spoke. Her voice brought me out of my thoughts.

“You’re okay. What you said kinda makes sense.”

“Yeah, well I’ve wondered about it since you first told me he was flirting with you. “

Leave it to Lynn to look out for me. I smiled.

Lynn stayed for a couple more hours. She even ordered us burgers since hospital food was less than ideal. We talked about what was happening at school and made plans to hang out outside of the hospital once I was discharged.

Before she left she offered to get me some things from my house. I jokingly asked if she could take my phone to the Apple store after school and get it fixed. I wouldn’t be surprised if she came up tomorrow with it repaired. That girl had my back.

***

My mom came to my room to visit the next morning. I was happy to see that she was able to walk on her own. I studied her face when she walked in. She was bruised and bandaged, but definitely better than I was. It appeared that Rick took most - if not all - of his anger out on me. Since she was able to walk without aid and had been stable since she got to the hospital, she was getting discharged.

“I’m kinda jealous you get to leave before me.”

“Well that wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t been there.” I blushed.

“I was just trying to protect you,” I mumbled. She put her hand on my arm.

“I appreciate that, Kellin, but I’m supposed to be the one protecting you. No seventeen-year-old should feel the need to jump in and get attacked.”

“You always told me we were a team. Well, on a team you look out for your teammates; you’ve got their back.”

She sighed. “I just hate that I put you in this position.” She started straightening the sheets on my bed.

“Hey, you loved the guy. I can’t blame you for that. Next time though, I’ll be doing a background check. We’re not gonna do this again.”

She rolled her eyes and smiled. We chatted for a little more before she left. She asked if my friends had communicated with me or had come by. Of course, I let her know Lynn did and was planning to come back again, but I left Vic out of the conversation. If what Lynn said was true then I was sure he wouldn’t want me telling my mon he was gay.

Lynn came by again before Mom left. She had actually gone by the house and picked me up some clothes, my charger, and headphones. She also went and got my phone fixed. She was officially the best best friend I could’ve asked for.

Lynn and I sat and talked for a couple hours. We FaceTimed the gang and had some laughs. They were a good distraction from everything.

Unfortunately, Lynn had to leave all too soon. I stayed alone in my room, this time with a phone for entertainment. I thought about texting my friends, but I had just video chatted with them. I didn’t want to seem too needy. Plus, there was someone else I wanted to talk to more.

Should I do it? No, right? He seemed like he needed his space. But still, everything that Lynn had suggested was still going around in my obsessive thoughts, and I knew they wouldn’t leave until I got some answers.

So I texted him.

I really need you to come by tomorrow. Please?

I didn’t get a response that night or the next morning. Or for the rest of that week.

[dansedan]

I threatened on the Disco Writer’s Nook server to share my notes from this latest fic, but since they’re wildly incomprehensible and kind of silly I thought maybe I’ll just... chuck ‘em on here instead, under a readmore where they can pass by easier so uhhh xX WeLcOmE To My TwIsTeD mInDXx !!!1!!

(warning for LONG LONG post- I write full sections and asides from the universe that aren’t even in the damn fic within the same notes document a lot... I’m also insufferably pretentious on notes I KNOW and I cull it on the final as much as I can, as well as mild possible spoilers for a fic I haven’t written in the same au-timeline-thing I suppose and NSFT stuff)

(also a lot of this gets discarded because it’s so stupid and I write it at terrible brain moments)

"Por la mañana me di a la estúpida tarea de esconder mis cigarros por los rincones de la casa. Los encuentro, claro, pero fumo poco, fumo menos, hago esfuerzos por mejorarme de una vez."

meditative cigarettes and quitting fic.

Harry smokes less than he drinks, because he smokes to keep sharp and he usually wants to be numb, down to zero, space-based. but after going tee-total and opening up on his quest to actual-human-persondom he finds himself chainsmoking constantly. A concern in his volition is raised, a thought project ruminated on, and strategems laid out.

Harry grasps at the first half at a low point in his attempts to get better without anyone knowing or helping. He wonders about Kim's life, Kim's control. The electrochemistry in him fantasizes about a free-wheeling party-boy sort of Kim, still cool, still quiet, but free and soft and in control of his lack of control- the aviator, the flying ace, at the mercy of the elements and gliding by by choice- lands on the question of the one-per day, the Kim he knows, who takes what he needs with trepidation and preparation.

The truth is that last one- Kim was a social smoker, an after-dinner-if-the-date-is-pleasant smoker, an after-sex smoker, a bumming-cigarettes-to-gague-his-interest smoker (it all started with a boyfriend) but police work and his neverending stint in Juvie drove him to once-per-day, a creature of obsession. He used to heavily resent it- until Harry came along and joined the ritual.

"bebiendo mate con el ademán gracioso de los novatos. Es lo que hago ahora cuando siento ganas de fumar, dijo, con una sonrisa."

Kim and Harry not so close together- the idea of Kim and Harry not knowing everything about each other, because that's just not how you survive, but somehow Kim aching to be up-to-date on Harry all the time.

Harry and his funny little excursions around town. Kim visits and finds cigarettes hidden around the house, smells them in fear of finding drugs, or Harry has to awkwardly shuffle around for one when Kim invites him to smoke. Harry tries to join a book club, starts cooking lofty meals for his yoga class, tries being vegan for a week, checks out a bunch of books on the history of the Coupris Corp (SUZERAINTY ERA MARK OF AUTHENTICITY BABEY) as a way to help him wean off substances but also off Kim. They want each other but they know they need to stand on their own </3

Harry starts going to this novelty/gourmet supermarket and buying one new thing every paycheck like furikake that says it has lead on it and mate and all that. He spends his ex-drinking, smoking money on it.

Harry makes Kim huevos rotos :'-)

You're barely holding it together- how the hell did you get to this newsstand? Is it a newsstand? This structure- round, metal, iron-wrought frame and squat stature- was once a newsstand. How do you know it isn't? What is it now? You feel yourself point someplace on a menu you can't see past the dew of heavy crying- the clerk does not react, he's seen you like this- slam your wallet on the counter. You receive a paper parcel slightly larger than your fist, long. It's warm through the paper, and you can feel the dryness of a light dusting of flour passing through it. Food.

Your legs and arms are moving on their own again, wallet shoved this way, steps stumbled past the other, clumsily bringing whatever it is to your mouth and feeling crumbs fall into your beard- like a shark. That's one of the first things you remember, the beautiful old ultraliberal woman, like a shark, on her boat. The joy of your first- no, second- idiom. The first was up on Marvel Hill where you can't live. Kim said that. Kim's gonna be there, when you do it like a shark and don't stop any of this on your way to work and you stop crying so nobody thinks you did what you're avoiding doing. Is there anyway you can forget the frittte? There's so many locations in your mind, what kind of man are you, remembering the placement of a store that's meant to vanish and appear out of convenience like it's a fucking pitstop (would a flask not be enough? A single habit to get rid of, easy- but you're never easy).

You feel dark-dark-light-darkness and then light again, and smoother flooring and your coat being too warm. You're at the precinct- fuck, you're at the precinct- and it's late, real late, but you are here and there's too many people to fuck up here and at least you aren't crying. Your red face and eyes blend perfectly into too many years and days of red and puffy eyes to call attention. Perfect, perfect- god bless the innocence (or is innocence god? You can't forget- Remember- something.)

"You're late, shitkid." At some point Jean appears beside you. He's walked the other way and stopped- he's grimacing- but more importantly you see his left arm raise and still and clench itself, like a restricted movement, natural instinct. "You smell like shit- is that fish?" You do not know if that is fish because your throat hurts so bad already that you cannot know if you've been swallowing bones for this past hour (minute? Minutes? The walk feels like forever and never enough. You're swearing like a pig now that you're standing, how adequate.) 

You want to say it's agony, the end of days, the end of you- you want to say reprise, and sorry, and oh god I didn't want to see you please I don't deserve it Jean please leave and go away from me and also please oh god please hold me up I don't know what I'm doing but I'm trying to be better but I ate this thing that might as well be sawdust and I do not know what time it's been for several days.

Instead you say "it's my GOD-GIVEN RIGHT, VIC" and you move along like a fucking idiot.

"An image arises in your mind's eye-- a baby, dirty, hideous, its skin mottled and raw and red, peeling, stretching almost impossibly. The baby cries from pain- in it's brief stay on this earth it has already suffered more than some men do in their entire lives. He is built for it- thick skin, quite literally. He is being held by a slight, pale, ugly nurse- a nun in bloodied white rags with a terrible smell of herbs permanently attached to her. The scene is a caricature of mother and child- the hideous thing, held up to her chest, is drinking from an amber bottle, clouded over. In ten years, the contents of this bottle he will be legally too young for-- is this the reason you became the way you are? Are you just born-and-bred this way, surviving off of alcohol where most people had blood and human kindness?

-- It's not. The little pastiche you've thought up for yourself is half propaganda and half racist idiocy. Despite what the supposed "race-realists" may say, not everyone from the Insulindian is thrown on the bottle the moment they're weaned from the tit. In truth, you were barely even medicated, and those bitter, herbaceous spirits are not the cause of your current addiction. It's still on you harry, it's always still on you.

"Wake up- time to listen to the radio.

You love the radio. You really, really love the radio. You think the radio was the greatest purchase you have ever made- drunk you was horrible, and traumatizing, and entirely undebatably subhuman, but he did buy this radio, and by god fuck if that isn't his saving grace (a story comes to mind- a Dolorean allegory from your childhood- about a selfish rich woman and a lazy cheating bum both ferried up to heaven by a single onion that she'd given him during their lives as charity. You choose to ignore the part where they fight and fall back into hellfire). It's the thing that broke you off from your mazovian monk-like refusal to buy anything for yourself other than flour for a week after THE HANGED MAN, it's what got you into cycling and hanging out with the neon eyebleed catsuits crew, it's what reminded you that public libraries exist and nobody will ask you why you're in there reading about suzerainty-era motor carriage manufacturing and the homo-sexual underground. It's the greatest thing since communism, since disco, since-- since-- since cigarettes and kebabs and- and--

... And idolizing someone to the point of crucifixion. Which you aren't supposed to be doing.

Good thing the radio cranks up real loud! 

"You've read everything in this section- theory, history, photography, even, notably, the single romance novel, comically bad, about a middle-aged Vespertine businessman travelling north to the harbour where he had experienced his first teenaged love-- and the young, strapping man he gets to know there. (There are boats involved- it's very biblical). All in all, you read it twice,  meticulously rewrote its horrifyingly vague and unsafe sex scenes (in pen, inside. Not like the librarian's gonna check it) and masturbated at your efforts, winning you a very sore wrist and about 30 minutes of crying because you remembered being in a bookshop with Kim in Martinaise while you were remembering what books were, and then remembered Jean's apartment having a secret stack of equally terrible heterosexual novels bequeathed to him by an ex that you made fun of him for (rabidly, for years).

"Harry's apartment is no longer clean, but not as dirty as before, and its stalwart light-green walls seem, in the summer light, less queasy and foreboding than what they are now, almost dainty in the contrast of the sparse few frames and piles of knickknacks on the floor. 

Believe it or not, this is good-- sometimes, life with Harry makes you feel like a zoologist, intricately analysing an animal's pile of leaves and refuse and knowing, despite all human standards, what these habits mean for the foreign species. And for Harry, mess like this is good. It means he's kept busy by any one of his million little projects,  picked up and put down at a dizzying speed and constancy, each one increasingly out of left field in

Kim and harry talk about the radio, kim thinks about it "radio, what's new? Radio- some-one still loves you"

Harry talking abt agenda + library bc you can't smoke + planning for dinner with Kim :-)

Gotta go to the library so you don't chainsmoke

Gotta shower to go to the library 

Don't wanna shower bc executive dysfunction

Grab a smoke before you shower 

Oh wait you've been chain-smoking fuck (insert meditation on sharp vs smooth)

Hide all your cigarettes around the house feeling pathetic about it

You still don't feel like showering

But you just chainsmoked and you know you'll do it again because you JUST hid your smokes and the hiding spots are fresh in your mind

Birdbath (why are you so fucking dysfunctional that you can't shower like a normal adult) 

Introspective rubber ducky selfhate momence

Rubber ducky encourages you through the power of nihilism and Kim

Thought project gain

Go to library and need comfort so you're going thru all your usual shelves (insert le funny homo shelf joke here) 

What does he read about? Smoking? Idk

Kiiiiiim. Kimmy kim kim. Think about Kim

Maybe he reads recipe books to woo kim

        INSERT EXISTENTIAL BROTH EPISODE HERE to talk about how you've never actually seen Kim cook (he told you it was good soup, clearly lying, you told him it was broth, and that you could teach him how to make soup out of it if he wanted...)

(broth episode was another note, inserted here: 

ANOTHER harry coping fic. Miserable housebound weekend nights because he can't party but the house is horrible to be in and he keeps dunking his hands into more and more ice water and taking like half-body cold showers and he's like "maybe this is bad for my skin!!! I gotta get out holy shit" and he's like uhhhh fucking. Can't go to work. Let's go to the supermarket. And then he's almost there and he's like OH FUCK NO THERES ALCOHOL AT THE SUPERMARKET and he straight up bolts out of there and muscle memory gets him to a shady ass butcher shop in some random immigrant neighborhood and he buys so much fish because of a failed check and he goes home and basically he makes so much fish stock. He makes just so fucking much fish stock and Kim comes to pick him up the next day and panics because it genuinely smells like the dead in there but it's just harry making fucking. fish broth or something. Just harry coming up to the door in his work clothes with way too much cologne on and a thermos of fish soup like "uh... Do you want some Broth kim?" And Kim can't fucking cook but he takes some Broth anyway and he's trying to figure out why harry would do that but harry is being a little edgy about it and Kim is like oh god I need to help him a little and they have a sit down about it and he's like wanting to say "hey if you need somewhere to go I'm here for you" but it's hard and I don't even know if he ends up actually saying it. Okay bye)

Talking about the sexiness of supermarkets and how they make reptile brain go brrr

Think about alcohol vs smoking. Think about kimmy kim kim (insert european drinking joke here)

Have that get stuck in his head. Kim kimmy kim kimmy kimmy kim kim. Kimster. Kimbo. Kitsy. Kitty. Cutie. Oh god no fuck oh god I need to stop.

He goes home and still rlly wants to smonk

You hide the cigarettes around the house. It feels stupid, and you know you’ll be embarrassed having to pull the Jamrock Shuffle in your own apartment, that you’re a grown adult who could just *buy another box of cigarettes* whenever you wanted to, but you feel like it helps. Drag the killing thing away from the crappy little animal even for a couple moments more, let yourself get tired out like the old man you are below all the disco scaffolding. You can’t really bring yourself to shower, but you drag the radio into the bathroom with you and wash yourself in the sink. You try to be good about it- stay away from the mirror, really lather up and clear away the sweat that’s caked to you throughout the night and morning, feel the warm graze of the water on your skin. You brush shampoo through your hair and work it in in cycles, focus on the humming feeling of the bristles on your scalp, trying not to think of much of anything, just the smell of the cheap powdery soap and of what clothes you’ll wear today, try to settle into a better memory of this instead of picking at the shame you feel about how hard it is for you. ducking your head into the stream of the water in the sink and forgetting everything except the whishing, scratching sounds of cleaning.

Being clean feels good, and being dressed again feels maybe even better (knit sweaters are a revelation- who could’ve known polyester satin wasn’t made for seaside winters), so by the time you walk your way into the Jamrock public library the morning’s incidents are nigh-forgotten. The dry warmth of the old library is a reliable balm- the yellowed fluorescent lighting washing out the rows and rows of slate-grey plastic bookshelves lined up like soldiers over prerevolutionary tile, with its woven edges and dark, jeweled pinwheels of color, stretching out endlessly full of books, reels, and the rare intricate portrait hanging overhead. Before them, long wooden tables dotted with mismatched lamps, flickering in and out of use, occupied by antsy juveniles and sleeping hobos. It feels effortlessly like home, like a shared worldly past that welcomes everybody- and maybe that just means that it's generic and a little overdue for renovations, but you love it as it is.

Shuffling through the tall shelves of books, you weave through mindlessly to find your favorite sections- the history (both common and infra-cultural, with a surprisingly competent collection of industrial works and a predictably miserablly little shelf of homo-sexual underground interest), the art, and the meager offerings of political literature. You can hear your off-tune humming echo back to you somewhat feebly off the high, painted ceiling, done up in some lame facsimile of early Dolorian excess (therriers, noblewomen, forget-me-nots crowding the edges of each filligreed panel, dead-eyed faces in doleful expressions, pale and empty smiling). You've got all of daylight ahead of you, which is more than enough time to browse around as usual before you have to get yourself home and start cooking.

You turn the corner smoothly into the very back of the library, into a wider set of dusty and anachronistic wooden bookshelves-- history trends unpopular, considering the fact that all the books within are horrifyngly outdated due to a miserable municipal budget, maybe that's for the best. There are better places for students to get this information now, like the private library a couple blocks away at the Cycle Universitee, or from library dial-stations tuned in from the south, where the Bibliotheque Nacionelle Des Travailleures is run by Coalition-approved volunteers. The first thing to catch your eye is the pillar of works of infra-cultural expression and documentstion- essays and short stories from New authors, studies and zines on Disco, and of course, the particular political darling of the 20s, the homo-sexual underground.

You've read everything in this section- theory, history, photography- even, notably, the single commercial romance novel, comically bad, about a middle-aged Vespertine businessman travelling north to the harbour where he had experienced his first teenaged love-- and the young, strapping man he gets to know there. (There are boats involved- it's very biblical). All in all, you read it twice,  meticulously rewrote its horrifyingly vague and unsafe sex scenes (in pen, inside. Not like the librarian's gonna check it) and masturbated at your efforts, winning you a very sore wrist and about 30 minutes of crying because you remembered being in a bookshop with Kim in Martinaise while you were remembering what the world was, and then remembered Jean's apartment having a secret stack of equally terrible heterosexual novels bequeathed to him by an ex that you made fun of him for (rabidly, for years). You shudder, now, at the sight of its cracked spine looking you from the middle sill. Its gaze feels hefty and judgemental, and you do not like it.

There are  

KIM CHAPTAAAA

"you'd like him to take care of himself. You'd like to be there to do it for him when he can't"

"He opens the door, and immediately there are a million little things that test you (hell, with that thick-knit sweater he's wearing, any weakness in you would have him writhing on the floor in seconds). The half-up style of his now-so soft looking auburn hair, split across to reveal the pale white of his nape between the raised collar of his sweater, the kind wrinkling of his open smile upon seeing you walk in, the light, jazzy music of the radio backing his belly-deep laugh and the heady smell of incense in the room are all exhilaratingly Harry to you.

What to do with jean:Standalone fic for him?

Starts when he sees Harry with the eyebleed crew and he's the one who goes up to him like "WHAT IN THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING SHIT KID" and harry is like. Oh god oh fuck jean uh let's be... Cordial! Optimistic! (What jean sees is one of his signature pauses but like. Yeah it's the skills talking) and he's just like "oh it helps me stay sober and make friends, I found out about it on the radio🙂" and Jean is like holy fucking shit this is absolutely insane.

            1) bc Harry used to be so repressed he was basically homophobic with his macho act

            2)bc Jean originally didn't believe the amnesia thing but then when Harry genuinely did shit like this and never told him (which, if it was a cruel joke he would've tried to make it very public and obvious and drag jean into it to embarrass him)

            3) because JEAN was his friend and why the fuck does he just. Run off with random people with a radio ad instead

            4) because he's doing so well. He's like, fully at the sort of "this-side-of-pudgy" bear level that's hot enough to get him positive attention over the damage of the alcohol and he's wearing the sort of clothes that show it and he's got all these crew buddies where Jean is stuck with his hellish depression workouts where he sometimes works until he pukes and then feels like shit about self-harming like that. (what he doesn't know is that Harry is basically doing that same exact shit just he's using his swag alcoholic skills to lieeeeee about it. rip)

Maybe harry apologizes in their conversation about the romance novels. Like it blurts out.

eventually add in the previous consideration fic you were thinking of &quot

starting with bitter porno kimbo/viccy catfight bullshit

"no that's pathetic and he'd never go there." dynamic where kim cares quietly and jean is bitchy about Harry

then "no, he's dealt with harry so much already, I can't imagine." so it's all concern for him

and then that backslides into "how could I comfort him? how could he understand my need for comfort? "

we stan a mildly nonaccepted himself Jean so he's like "WAIT UH GAY THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS GUY TOO? FUCK FUCK FUCK"

gotta make it panic horny. it's a Dan Gat fic. how would kim look.... yknow......

since the only other guy who's been like that with him has been harry -> third wheel dynamic going to ->

horny ot3 dynamic. old men doting on him because it's his fantasy and he gets to be the pampered one goddamnit

end somehow

THIS IS THE EXACT DYNAMIC WE'RE GOING FOR Jean liked Harry premart and Harry was unbearably machismo repressed homophobic bullshitero man (I need to decide if he was stupid enough to be like AS LONG AS IM ON TOP IT ISNT GAYYYY or smth sex/intimacy related like that maybe he just kinda. ""comically"" hit on Jean or said suggestive shit to him but never fully acted on it) and then he comes back from Martinaise all loyal puppy dog or whatever for Kim and Jean is like "??? OKAY SO I GO THROUGH ALL THIS BULLSHIT AND HE TALKS SO BIG ABOUT LOVING MUSCLE DUDES AND NOW HES GONNA FUCK THIS GRANDPA?" but then he's like self-aware enough to know that's stupid.(Jean's problem is that he looks for wounds on Kim and not Harry, so he's all like "damn this bitch stole my mans when he's actually good...." meanwhile Harry is like Very Obviously Self Harming All The Time and not even really with Kim so often rip)

Harry wants to reach out and ask him about his thing with Kim because he has memories of Jean either being gay or being less homophobic or just having Gay Energy that he was an asshole about or whatever plus it just feels natural to work through shit with Jean but he stops himself because he's like "well DRINKING also felt natural that doesn't mean we should do it..."

maybe they get into it because Jean makes an offhand comment about "stop ogling kim" and harry is like (computer warmup noises) and jean just kinda forces him to spit it out RE: meme description

Harry's whole deal with avoiding Jean is "some things are unforgivable and I'm fairly sure I've done things bordering on that to you for so, so long, and now I don't even know what they were or who I was when I did them, to me that person is dead, and I know then that I can't apologize to you thoroughly, genuinely, and I don't want to insult you by presuming that I ever could, at this point. I don't want to insult you by assuming I can just go back to what we were before, to each other, without an apology or an actual understanding of what went wrong. I can't speak for certain about his mind-my mind- but at least in some part that guy killed himself because of what he did to you, and to everyone around him, sure, but mostly to you. And now I'm here, and it feels horrible to try and go against that and push myself into your life. It feels horrible to see I've done something to you worth killing myself over and then still insist on coming back to bother you beyond the grave"

And Jean's response is "you thought everything was bad enough to kill yourself over! And you're still alive, you're still him, and fuck, yes it'll take a long ass fucking time for me to ever really forgive you, but you were my best friend and you're still fucking alive- I see you every single day, Harry, do you know what that's like? To see your best fucking friend every single day and watch him flinch and try to act like he doesn't exist every single time he sees you? Fuck you and fuck what you wanted before, *I* never wanted you dead, and your little stunt here with pretending you're finally fine and then keeping everyone at an arm's distance is just another, slower grave you're digging" etc etc "if this is the upswing at last, I’d better be there for it.**”

Jean is a frat boy that you do not expect to be a frat boy. He unironically gets along with mack and chester. He's only just started to grow out of it through dealing with Harry's horrible downfall

sequel to geste drole des debutantes but it's just a 3 chapter PWP masturbation fic..... of Kim and Harry after the dinner and then SHOOKETH SURPRISE IT'S JEANGST YEARNING TIME!

Kim trans.... Good for him...

Stroker shit

He wants to fuck Harry basically

     ...slow tease? Or fast and desperate?

Dry kissing

Hair pulling...

Youre hard, and you're wet, and you can't help but think of that smile on his face as you left and you want him to taste it, to get on his knees for what he's done to you and swallow it all down, feels the soft brush of his beard on your thighs.

 Harry also trans... Good for them good for them...

Handkink shit

Wants kim to absolutely wreck his shit

... He's new at this

Slow....

Jean

Jeangst

Want to wreck harry's shit... Mouthfuck stuff maybe

Power bottoming?? Idk

Whoops my hardcore dom revenge fantasy has slipped into a getting bossed around by the guy I thought I disliked for taking away my partner UHH.... LETS NOT UNPACK THAT....

Some idiot makes like a homophobic stupid "ah the fucking lieutants off scissoring or something" comment and then jean is like "oh god what if that but sexual instead"

Gym shower...

Jean has a big dick too bad bitch

When harry du bois ruined his life, thinks satelitte-officer Jean Vicquemare- he might at least have had the decency not to also curse his dick. This shit was weekly and only getting worse, now that the shitkid didn't constantly smell like despair and carrion had scored a threesome with a bartender's manual.

[duhragonball]

On Twitter, there’s a new movement that started up on... Thursday, I guess, with the hashtag #SpeakingOut, where women were encouraged to call out instances of sexual abuse.     I’m not sure if it started with the pro wrestling community or not, because earlier in the week I saw some stuff about comic book pros like Warren Ellis and Cameron Stewart, but maybe that was a precursor.   All I know is that right now, I’ve been seeing all sorts of names being dropped in the pro wrestling business, each of them accused of being sexual predators, or covering up for the crimes of others.    Some of the names I don’t recognize, because they’re independent wrestlers from promotions I’m not familiar with, but I’ve seen some names I do know, and that’s pretty tough to take.   I’m going to discuss this here. 

Predictably, I’ve seen some backlash to #SpeakingOut, which reminds me of the same bullshit talking points used by the #IStandWithVic crowd last year.   In case you didn’t know, Vic Mignogna was a voice actor who worked for Funimation and provided the dub performances for Broly in DBZ, and Eward Elric in Fullmetal Alchemist.   I think those were his two most famous roles.   Over the decades, Vic garnered a reputation for being a sex pest, kissing and inappropriately touching women and teenage girls at conventions, and harassing his colleagues.  I assume the release of the “Dragon Ball Super: Broly” movie in the U.S. in 2019 precipitated a newfound interest in those allegations, and fans started objecting to his bookings at 2019 conventions.    By mid-year, Vic was fired from Funimation and RoosterTeeth, and he responded to this by starting an ill-advised defamation lawsuit.   

Vic’s defenders are, to put it mildly, idiots.    There were professional lawyers on Twitter who explained, very clearly, why this lawsuit was a bad idea.   The main reason being that it was done in Texas, which has a lot of laws designed to make it harder to sue people for defamation.    I think Vic’s goal was to find some way to punish his accusers for making him look bad and getting him fired.   Winning the lawsuit, was a way for him and his supporters to feel like they “cleared his name”, except that was never how it worked.   If he had been arrested and tried for sex pest crimes, the burden of proof would be on his accusers to show that he really did bad things.   But he was suing people for slander, so that means the burden of proof was on him to show that they really were saying things that were demonstrably false and damaging to his reputation.    The main problem with that is everyone had been talking about his sex pestery for years, so it doesn’t make sense to single a few people out in 2019 and blame them for reinforcing something everyone already believed.  But the ISWV crowd kept insisting that this distinction didn’t matter, and that it was wrong to ostracize or turn against Vic without “proof”.   I see the same demands for “proof” being tossed around for all these wrestling personalities.  

I think there’s a couple of things going on with this.   One is simple denial.   If you’re a fan of someone and you find out they did something terrible, you really don’t want to believe it.   I was never that into a lot of these guys, but I know I felt pretty low when I first heard about Vic’s shenanigans, because I liked his work.    And I’m feeling that way about Warren Ellis now.   Not a huge fan, but I liked some of his stuff, and now I feel a little guilty by association for ever liking that stuff in the first place.   It would be nice, I suppose, to just pretend that I hadn’t heard those accusations, or that they weren’t real.    Then I could just go back to the way things were before, without all the uncomfortableness.   I just can’t do that, but it seems like a lot of people can and will.   It’s not about “proof”, it’s about putting up some sort of barrier that will excuse them from confronting an unpleasant truth. 

I think this is why you see people going out of their way to defend Christopher Columbus and Confederate monuments.    They want to believe that there was something noble about that stuff, because the alternative is to admit that a lot of the things they learned in school aren’t true, and a lot of the “heritage” they cling to is built on white supremacy and slavery.    I don’t think anyone really cares about a Robert E. Lee statue, but I’ve seen people go out of their way to try to say Lee opposed slavery, like he’s one of the good Confederates, so he should get a pass.   Except he did own slaves, and even if he hadn’t, he still fought to defend a nation founded on slavery as a guiding principle.    Tearing down a statue of Lee is a tacit admission that Lee never deserved a statue in the first place, and everyone who admired him was wrong, and maybe the admiration was rooted in racism all along.   That’s a bitter pill for people to swallow, and a lot of them just refuse to swallow it.   So they deny and deflect, and do anything they can to make this about something else.   

The other side of it is just plain hatred.   I don’t know if Vic’s defenders were all misogynists to begin with, but it seems like they all got there, one way or another.   The train of thought always seemed to be “He didn’t do these things, but even if he did there’s nothing wrong with it.”   From what I saw, it really seemed like Vic’s backers were all fired up about defending a man’s right to creep on women in any way he sees fit.   “What, so kissing is illegal now?” No, jackass, but when you’re fifty-fucking-five and you kiss a seventeen-year-old girl who only wanted to take a picture with you, it’s pretty damn messed up.    When you use your celebrity status to try to mack on young fans, that’s messed up.   When you’re an established wrestler and you try to take advantage of up-and-coming wrestlers, that’s messed up.    And some of that behavior is totally illegal, but the sad reality is that most of these creeps will never get prosecuted for any of it.   That’s why the calls for “proof” are so hollow, because everyone knows it’ll never end up in a courtroom.  At best, some of these guys will get fired, and guess what?  “Innocent until proven guilty” doesn’t apply to employers.   I lost a job once because my “teamwork” wasn’t good enough, and that was the closest thing to an explanation I got.    Don’t bullshit me about “proof”.

I guess I should tie this train of thought in with Black Lives Matter while I’m at it.    I find it absurd that the police in this country are so out of touch that when there’s a nationwide protest against police brutality, their immediate response is... more brutality.   This, more than anything I’ve seen, is the reason to defund the police.    They appear to only have the one mode of conduct, and they don’t even know how to do things a different way.    If the situation is this bad, we may as well scrap the police as they are and start over.   If the cops wanted to fix this situation, all they have to do is treat people with respect and hold themselves accountable, but they can’t let go of their hatred for five fucking minutes and figure that out.   This is why you hear about those guys who make up stories about restaurants spitting in their food.   They’re paranoid that everyone’s out to get them because they know they deserve to face some consequences, so they’re constantly on guard for this sort of thing.  It’s sick. 

Somehow, people who support these guys end up supporting the very behavior they were supposed to be denying.    Maybe this is why Columbus is such a sticking point.   I never gave a shit about Columbus.   One of my high school yearbooks had a Columbus theme because it just happened to come out on the 500th anniversary of his first voyage to North America, but I never understood what that had to do with my high school.   I think there’s people that want to give him tons of credit, basically thank him for everything that’s happened in the Western Hemisphere since 1500, not in spite of his atrocities, but to retroactively justify them.   What I mean is, if you can convince society that Columbus was a great man, and that his achievements outweigh his wrongdoing, then you can also convince society that the wrongdoings aren’t actually that bad.    “The price of progress,” they can say.    It’s like the idea that Robert E. Lee is admired solely for his “brilliant” military mind.   His side lost the fucking war, so I never understood how he gets all this credit for being a great general.    The point is that if you can convince people that he was a noble man in spite of the slavery thing, then you can open the door to the idea that the Confederacy as a whole wasn’t That Bad, and that only opens the door to the idea that slavery wasn’t That Bad, and so on.  

Same deal with Roman Polansky and Woody Allen.    It amazes me that people will still try to defend those fucks, but it probably has a lot to do with all the other sex pests in Hollywood, who hope that everyone will stick up for them when they get exposed.   So you have this little chesnut about how “Yeah, they did bad things, but they sure made some good movies.”     The implication is that you have to accept a few sex crimes if you want good art.    And no, that’s not true, and even if it were true, it wouldn’t be worth it.   

I don’t know where things will end up with J.K. Rowling.   I’d like to think that one of these days, she’ll wake up and apologize for all this TERF rhetoric she’s been spouting.    That would probably be the best-case scenario.   More likely, she’ll cause an entire generation of Harry Potter fans to wrestle with their loyalty to her books.   There’s no job to fire her from, no laws to punish her, no government agency to step in.    She’s got no financial stake in repairing this PR damage.   There’s going to be an audience of bigots that will still kiss up to her no matter what she says, so her ego will be well-insulated.    Maybe a hundred years from now, people will be talking about tossing her statue in a river, as society admits that we don’t need to accept transphobia in exchange for YA literature.   

I don’t know, I think I went all over the place with this one, but I had a lot to get off my chest.   I think the overall lesson from this year is that we can’t put these people on pedestals.   Some of them are just hell-bent on letting us down, and it’s just a matter of time before their misdeeds are brought to light.   I see these dopes with Thin Blue Line flags and “I stand with [X]” hashtags and I’m like “Who are you supporting here?    What is it you’re standing for, exactly?   Why should they be worthy of your loyalty?”    And I think the answer is less about loyalty to a person or group, and more about sticking it to someone else.   Women, minorities, whoever.   They just want to stand by someone to spite someone else.    And that’s awful.