#also yes the hypothetic 'sex' would be gay in this case because. i said so | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

warblossom34 · 7 months

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ugust 17th, 20231 month ago

thevenus-child sent a message:

“Can we feel it when our twin flame is with someone else or having sex with anybody ? I’m curious about this one 👀”

Yes! It’ll reflect on you in form of sensational feeling.

👀

2 notes

anon reader

august 17th, 20231 month ago

thevenus-child sent a message:

“maddie doesn't know if evan's soulmate is dating, because she doesn't have more details about his life, but his soulmate wouldn't necessarily be in a romantic relationship, could it be about other types of relationships that she might have to deal with?”

Hey! Actually it’s not because I don’t know anything about Evan, in fact I do know him, but i don’t know about this soulmate/ Twin flame because she still unknown we don’t know might she be like. But as for being in certain relationship it could be as it could not, eventually she’ll meet Evan at the stage of her life when she’s over all her past, even if she’s in any form of relationship now it’s just karmic, her real romantic relationship will start with him. Same for Evan.

🙏✨

3 notes

anon reader

august 15th, 20231 month ago

thevenus-child sent a message:

“Didn’t Maddie said something about a short guy in one of her readings and someone said it was jeff but jeff is tall i swear i saw this?”

I don’t remember exactly which reading or what was it about, but if you want my opinion of what this reader said about Evan which parts are true which are not and i don’t believe in it :

About Evan having mommy issues : I agree it’s even noticeable about him and his behavior with women also how he love to receive the affection and care from his girlfriend in different way as a guy with no mommy issues treat his lady. Evan expect every woman to treat him the way him momma does, we know he has a strong bound with his mother and how lovingly he talks about her, also in the family he grow up in he opened his eyes on his mom the very first lady who loved him and genuinely cared about him but also the one and only woman who he used to ask permission from to do anything in life. The fact that he said once in one of the interviews he has done he said that he asked to do the tattoo from his mom first, when she said yes it’s okay you can have it, he immediately went to get it with her name “MOM”, and it’s a form of love he has towards his mother. However many would think having mommy issues is a bad thing or kind of self insert feeling ; the truth it’s okay to have mommy issues, because a person with mommy issues would only seek love and attention from their partner the same love he receives from his maternal figure, and this is Evan’s case. Some with mommy issues would look for this love because they didn’t have this bound with their mother or their mother was bit strict sort of not giving enough love and attention or creating this bound between mother and child, so having mommy issues is completely okay unlike Daddy issues which is another topic.

Seeing him in a Dark void: This just a hypothetical description the reader used based on his eyes color or the way he has down turned eyebrows towards his eyes which they most of the time don’t seem smiley unless he smiles, and most of people who knows him just on American horror story and his dark roles finds him creepy because his eyes are so dark and his brows are so sharp, so no i don’t agree with this one, because if you ask me what do i see through his eyes, i don’t see anything but childlike excitement, and innocent soul.

Evan Being gay: This one in my opinion and to be honest, the reader explained this based on the gay roles because it’s same with the eyes just because the reader knows him as actor Evan Peters who starred in most of AHS series as the villain who fucks every man in the series , i don’t believe in the idea of Evan womanizing just because he’s lowkey gay or bisexual.

Thank you for your input into the “mommy issues” subject. As always you come with the wisdom! I get picky with how readers chose their words to communicate their readings.

4 notes

anon reader

august 14th, 20231 month ago

thevenus-child sent a message:

Forgot to mention ; i think this person might be few years younger than him like in their late twenties beginning of thirties. But also one thing about him being seeing multiple ladies, actually i had the 3 of cups card it generally represents a threesome in love readings lol, but I’m not saying he’s having a threesome with someone, but it could be he had fun with couple ladies recently probably 2 one of them is this new girl. Don’t twist my words please I’m just keeping the door open for all possibilities.

2 notes

anon reader 👀

august 14th, 20231 month ago

evan peters love reading 💝 for august 14th 2023 🔮

Hello. Hi. I’ve done the love reading for this month as promised, and tbh the reading is so fresh and exciting I’m already feeling this energy, i think there’s to many details the cards gave me alright so let’s not make it too long and get into it:

So as always I’ve pulled cards from major and minor arcana, actually I shuffled the cards while asking “ What should I know about Evan’s new relationship?” I have two cards jumped together; The Ace of Cups and the two of Cups , so “ The Ace of Cups ” represent new beginning a fresh start, a romantic atmosphere and flirtation, a positive beginning as well and sort of deep feelings for the other and crushing on the other, exchanging words and romantic feelings, so as for the “ 2 Of Cups” it’s a card that indicates partnership in general and every love reading and being at the same wavelength as the other, with the Ace of cups it indicates here a casual dating. So probably they met casually like they have been introduced to each other that’s true and went to a casual dating, and probably this is their first date where they have been seen.

I shuffled again and Yes the knight of cups okay; this card is telling a lot , so this may represent that there have been so much talks between the two through social media, before the meeting so when he went back home they organized a meeting which is means a home town girl, i feel like a friend or a family member who shipped them together, there’s a lot of feelings exchange through DMs, it also telling me that it’s a crush not really that deep. With “ The knight Of Wands ” i can really see typical flirt and passion and so much sexual energy to be honest lol, a desire of having so much with each other ( I believe the knight of wands is Evan because it’s a strong male energy), i think they already had their first night since the sighting is supposed to be last week and as i saw it was the first date so if you know you know.

“ The Temperance ” this card hasn’t been in my readings in a while, however it represents a good omen in love readings; this card may indicate a balance between two individuals , there’s a good chemistry and being patient or taking time to know each other more, the other side of this card is that this situationship i should call may not last longer and its Temporary fun and exciting but a good one like a good experience if it didn’t go further, let’s see what will happen only time can tell right!

“The Queen of Wands ” when it comes to physical appearance, this is a brunette haired, short or mid hair, brown, Hazel or light colored eyes, Short or average height, slim, freckled maybe or barely noticed freckles, light skin probably white, casual style, way of dressing maybe with some sense of grunge, or edgy ( she may be dying her hair frequently ” , “ The empress reversed” so here with this card reversed i think this girl is less in beauty then him, so maybe when people are gonna see they’ll be like oh but he’s prettier kinda than her , ( everyone is peters on his own).

Possible signs ; Fire sign, Air, and Earth sign it could as it could be not risings can be also included.

I wanna point out to something, I hate saying it but I don’t think this relationship is going any further, i don’t see any serious intentions towards each other except having fun and crushing on each other plus some beautiful romantic words exchanging, probably because it’s still in the beginning of it? I don’t know we will see by time it’s all based on the choices he makes and the divine power as well, cards can only provide us with some hidden information.

That’s it for today’s reading you guys, i hope you enjoy it. If you have any questions or want to share opinions you’re welcome to ask, I’ll answer yours once i get to see it.

Regards. Maddie ❤️

9 notes

submission anon reader evan peters

august 14th, 20231 month ago

thevenus-child sent a message:

Hello there! This is a response to anon who said that Admin is making decision on her own, and that I didn’t mention anything:

First of all without all of us forgetting she’s the main owner of the blog, i am an extra intruder who joined to to her eight months ago; and it’s been obviously an honor to be a part of this reading circle. In fact she always discusses with me any and every decision has been stated on this blog before, we may not talk about everything in here but we definitely do on DMs. period. I’ve been a part of everything Admin has posted here.

Secondly, I’ve discussed the decision of pausing any reading related to Evan’s love life; because I’ve been asked thousands times to repeat the soulmate reading because some were twisting things up and that they should be Evan’s soulmate described on the reading, not only this but everytime there’s a chitchat about Evan and Haley speculation of being together I’ve been asked to do a reading to feed their fantasies of being the one and only who will save him; no other girl can be with him but them ( unhealthy jealousy and Medieval Daydreaming). So i decided with the admin to put a pause for the current time at least until this drama stops.

Last but not least, we’ve discussed this decision of redoing a reading about his dating life once a month, with making sure to get to answer your asks about the reading like everytime we do, but please respect the rules Admin mentioned to avoid extra stress, drama, and hate towards anyone because this not the aim of the blog. I’m not trying to be mean, but this is really needed to talking about, because I’ve been called out so many times about the practice i for quoted “ being a witch ”, i am not i am a human being like y’all so is Admin so is Evan. Let’s be all open to all possibilities as always and respect others lives and opinions.

Thank you so much Maddie! <3

2 notes

anon reader

august 7th, 20231 month ago

thevenus-child sent a message:

“Maddie do you think we will hear from him again or see him?”

Yeah soon probably this week or two weeks later, either hear about him or from a fan sighting.

👀

2 notes

anon reader

august 6th, 20232 months ago

evan peters reading for august 6th 2023, how he likes his future wedding ceremony to be like ✨🔮

Hello. Hi. I apologize for the late response but life got busier lately, so I’ve done the reading as promised about Evan’s future wedding preferences, how he likes it to be like..etcetera, let’s not make it longer and jump quick into it :

Well I’ve pulled 4 cards from major and minor arcana, so while shuffling the first card jumped was “ 4 of Wands” this card is all about celebration harmony and joyous gathering, so it indicates that the couple of this wedding are surrounded by bunch of friends, family, and well-wishers who are there to celebrate and uplift them, so he might like small gathering of people to celebrate his marriage not a huge ceremony like those royal weddings or the wedding where the whole world knows about. “ The 10 of cups”, so this card is a complementary to the first one, again small ceremony with the attendance of close friends and both partners families, it also indicates what seems to be like traditional or formal marriage! Since his parents both are catholic and have their own preferences for marriage, like a preacher and a religious figure to attend and bless the couple something like this.

“Queen of Wands”, this card indicates either the marriage is going to take a place in the backyard or in place where all is green and flowery if that makes sense, as well as it could be during spring season. I have also the “ The 5 of pentacles jumped in here, so here’s the thing this could be either indicating that He won’t have a luxurious expensive wedding which means not spending too much on the ceremony since it’s going to be small not that huge, or about the groom’s parents ( Evan’s parents) worried if the couple would be able to take care of each other in the future and it’s pretty normal since they’re parents.

“The death”, well the Death card is not always a bad omen, it also has a positive meaning sometimes it could mean an end of something we wanted to get a rid of it so badly; so here this indicates that he’ll feel a sense of relief when this day end like “ wheww eventually it’s over..!” Like this. Or it could indicate transformation like for example if they were dating for so long and engaged for so long the the marriage finally took a place, things would change probably there’ll be more responsibility here, or thinking of whether they want to have babies or more if they actually did before marriage lol anyways sort of change and transformation, life transformation from girlfriend and boyfriend to husband and wife.

The last card, we have “ the page of pentacles ”, so this signifies gifts, financial abundance or expensive gifts, so he’ll probably receive so many expensive gifts from friends and family members, and congratulations from people outside the circle ( Fans or previous coworkers..).

That’s it for today’s reading, it was so beautiful and lightheaded reading to do I loved how simple his weeding is, if you have any questions or want to share opinions feel free I’ll answer them once I see your questions.

Regards💛

5 notes

submission anon reader evan peters

july 12th, 20232 months ago

thevenus-child sent a message:

“Someone on tweam mentioned they did a letter reading on evan and it said that he is not really into sex. what is a letter reading first of all and do you think it’s true? him not being into intimacy?”

Letter Readings aren’t accurate, and sometimes it gives the total opposite of what you’re willing to get. Personally I’ve never done it for someone because it’s pretty hard and unclear, I do feel that Evan is a stallion when it comes to bed and intimate thingies.

🐎

“is that how you met your boyfriend? and how old is he?”

Hey! yeah we met at a friend's anniversary he was a friend with my friend's husband. So he told me among all the ladies there I was the one caught his attention, because he thought I was the prettiest girl he has ever seen lol. Period. He is 33.

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hermannsthumb · 3 years

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Lo and behold, HERMANN is the one with a long list of hunky ex-boyfriends (and it drives Newt a little nuts)

a req sent in by @k-sci-janitor and filled TIMELY ENOUGH on their BIRTHDAYYYYY 🎉🎉🎉🎉 s/out to them for discussing this fic concept w me months ago and also today 👀

-----------------------------

It’s a relief to find out Hermann is gay. It’s not even because of Newt’s weird, repressed feelings for the guy—though he admits it’s equally a relief to know that he’s not barking up the wrong tree entirely. The thing is that Newt’s really not sure what he would do if Hermann wasn’t. Hermann has the distinct honor (displeasure?) of being Newt’s only friend in the Shatterdome, after all; this means aside from usual friendship duties (sitting with Newt at lunch, listening to him complain about his day, allowing himself to be dragged along to bars and movie theaters when they finally have a second to breathe), he’s also the person Newt goes to with tales of his romantic conquests (not that he has any), requests for dating advice (not that Hermann has any), and reassurances that whoever Newt has his eyes on that week is hot enough for him (could they ever be?). It’s just, like, easier to do that kinda shit with someone who would also be (hypothetically) eyeing up and dating dudes, if Hermann ever managed to take the stick out his ass and relax long enough to do stuff like that.

Hell, Newt would be first in line if he ever did. As it is, he just has to settle on knocking knees with Hermann under the mess tables and—for lack of a better phrase—checking the latest batch of ranger hopefuls out. Newt doesn’t normally go for the tall, built, and athletic type, but Shatterdome transfers are usually the only way he can score a date, because all the seasoned personnel know to avoid the weirdo biologist in the basement by this point. There’s a war on; desperate times call for desperate measures. Newt hopes at least a handful of them are desperate.

“He’s kinda hot, don’t you think?” Newt says under his breath to Hermann. He jerks his thumb over his shoulder at one of the new ranger trainees in line for soup behind them. He has dark hair and a nice smile, and—more importantly—Newt’s sure he’s been making eyes at their table for the better part of five minutes. He’s one of the latest batch that has only just arrived two weeks prior, and the smallest batch by far. Not many people are enlisting in the PPDC these days. Bad for the state of the world and Newt’s libido.

“Hm?” Hermann says.

“The guy behind us,” Newt says. “No, don’t be obvious about it—”

But Hermann turns, conspicuously, so (deciding it can’t get any more awkward than it already is) Newt sighs and turns with him. The dark-haired ranger notices: his smile hitches up an extra centimeter, and he winks.

At once Newt feels his ego swell. He winks back. “Still got it, dude,” he crows to Hermann, and is just rising from his chair to swoop into action when he realizes something; the ranger was not making eye contact with Newt. He was—and is—making eye contact with Hermann.

Hermann scoffs. “Oh, please,” he mutters to Newt. “If he thinks that’ll get him invited over again—”

But the ranger is abandoning his spot in line and jogging towards them, smoothing down his hair as he goes. He’s brimming with a palpable mixture of excitement and anxiety. “Hey, Dr. Gottlieb,” he says. “So, uh, last week was pretty fun?” It’s an invitation for approval, one which Hermann ignores in favor of jerking his shoulders noncommittally. The ranger presses on anyway. “It’s cool to see you. Haha. I, uh, just wanted to make sure you have my email, in case you want to get together again.”

“I have it,” Hermann says.

An awkward tension settles between them. Newt clears his throat in hopes of diffusing it, and the ranger’s eyes dart over to him. “I’m Newt,” Newt says. “Hermann and I work together.”

“Cool,” the ranger says. Disinterested. “Anyway, Dr. Gottlieb, I’m free whenever, so?”

“Yes, I’ll certainly email you,” Hermann says. He picks up his dinner roll and begins to spread butter over it, not bothering to look up when he adds “Lovely to see you again.”

The guy nods, and hurries back over to his friends, who begin debating something with him in hushed voices. Twice the group glances back at Hermann. Hermann’s—uh—friend seems to be blushing. Hermann begins to butter the other half of his dinner roll. “What the hell was that about?” Newt says.

Hermann sets down his roll and furrows his eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

“That,” Newt says. “Who was that guy?”

“Oh,” Hermann says. “Him.” He rolls his eyes, and to Newt’s alarm goes pink in the cheeks. “We had a, ah, a date, I suppose you could call it, last week. He turned out to be a bit rude, actually, not the very, er, courteous sort. Attentive. Or at least not as courteous as I like. You know.”

“I don’t,” Newt says.

“You know,” Hermann repeats, with more force on the know. His pink blush spreads down his neck. “In the—coupling—sense.”

“You hooked up with him?” Newt says, too loud. A few heads swivel in their direction, including Hermann’s quote-unquote date and his friends; Hermann whacks Newt in the shin with his cane, clearly mortified.

“Keep your voice down! I don’t want the whole bloody Shatterdome to know, do I?” Hermann hisses. “Yes, I had sex with him. I do occasionally take time to enjoy myself.”

Newt stares at Hermann in amazement. Hermann hooks up? Hermann hooks up with hunky guys? Hermann hooks up with hunky guys and then ghosts them? “I didn’t know,” Newt says. “That you…did that.” Months and months of talking about his shitty love life to Hermann and Hermann has never once bothered to volunteer information of his own. Newt always just assumed Hermann had put his emotional (and physical) needs on hold for the sake of the war. Apparently not.

“You never asked,” Hermann says. “Is it important?”

Yes, it is. Newt shakes his head. The rest of their dinner is quiet and without any further interruptions. It’s also without their usual bickering, though, which makes it feel oddly lonely, and when Newt gets back to his bunk that night, he can’t help but wonder what else he hasn’t discovered about Hermann yet. Or, really—what about Hermann’s love life he hasn’t discovered yet.

A bouquet of flowers arrives for Hermann at the lab a week later. Newt is the one to take the delivery, Hermann being too absorbed in his calculations and boring graphs, and also because Newt is harboring a secret hope they’re for himself from a secret admirer. No such luck. To Dr. Gottlieb, the heart-shaped label proclaims in pink cursive, and a few sentences of the sappiest attempt at poetry Newt’s ever seen follows. Love, Pedro. Newt smirks through a suffocating wave of jealousy, whether to be the one giving or getting the flowers he’s not sure. “Hey, Hermann,” he calls across the lab. “Your boyfriend getting persistent. Want me to stick these in water for you?”

Hermann grumbles something, then says “Boyfriend?”

“From the mess the other night,” Newt says. “The uncourteous one.” Newt double-checks the note. “Pedro. His heart is yearning for you, Hermann. Listen to this—”

But Hermann scoffs loudly before Newt can even start on the poem. “Don’t be daft,” he says. “That wasn’t Pedro. That was Jason.” He scribbles over something on his chalkboard and starts again on the line below it. “And Pedro is hardly my boyfriend—it was only dinner.”

“Dinner?” Newt squeaks.

“And drinks,” Hermann says.

“You’re seeing another guy?” Newt says.

Hermann finally turns around. “Does it matter if I am?” he says.

“Yes,” Newt says. “No? I don’t know?”

“I’m a grown man, Newton,” Hermann says. “I date. You ought to try it yourself—it does wonders for the nerves.” When Newt is clearly still unsatisfied, Hermann sighs. “I met Pedro on an errand to LOCCENT last month, and I found him charming. You’d recognize him—you actually, er, caught us in a bit of a compromising position the other night. Remember?”

Newt frowns. He hasn’t caught Hermann with anyway in any compromising situations recently—the only thing he can think of that could be considered remotely embarrassing is when he stepped out into the hallway the same time Hermann’s physical therapist did, and they ended up bumping into each other. But that was—oh, God, Newt’s an idiot. “That was him?” Newt says. He just assumed anyone stopping by Hermann’s room after work hours would be there for physical therapy, okay? And there had been a lot of…noise. Well, he’s not going to think about that now. “But he was so hot! Do you only date, like, hunks or something?”

“Really, Newton,” Hermann says. “You’re making yourself upset over nothing.” The corner of his mouth twitches up. “Though one of my old ex-boyfriends did become an underwear model…”

“Dude,” Newt says, and before he can help himself, blurts out “Shit, maybe I should start going to the gym.”

Hermann gives him a strange, searching look, and Newt immediately clamps his mouth shut in horror. He’s really gotta start working on his brain-to-mouth filter. Or at least work on not sticking his fucking foot in it every five minutes. “As I said,” Hermann says, cryptically, and turns away (apparently satisfied with whatever he saw in Newt), “you’re making yourself upset over nothing. I hardly find the need to limit myself to ‘hunks’.”

“Uh,” Newt says. “Right.”

Whatever that means.

#newmann #maria's fanfiction tag #Anonymous

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outrunningthedark · 3 years

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Maybe I’m just thinking controversially but I feel like T*ylor is the only example out of the two where some of the shit she gets is cause she’s female. Like a lot of it’s good reasons but it’s more hate than if a male character did the same. But she also has a lot more people protecting her at the same time which (hypothetically) wouldn’t be the case with a male reporter. Like the whole plot point of wanting to stream the clips she got of Bobby when he was high and just wanting to stream those clips in general and only not doing it because the stations lost a lawsuit. Honestly I’ll never know cause ya know they used a female reporter but I haven’t been able to stop thinking about this

I won't attempt to psychoanalyze everyone else's dislike of T*ylor, but for myself, I have no real issue with the character on her own. I'm a lesbian. M/F romances do nothing to keep me interested. I realize I'm in the minority here, because from my perspective, this fandom is made up of folks who are "okay" with either outcome (Buddie vs. BT). Had BuckT*ylor remained platonic, then my only *gripe* would be a het white (side) character's screen time exceeding that of the three black characters who also happen to be canonically gay (Michael, David, Karen). We all to see storylines that match our personal experiences, no? It's why people attach various LGBTQ+ labels (headcanons) to their fave(s), right? I relate more to the gay characters, specifically Karen and Hen as they are also lesbians, than I do T*ylor Kelly. That's the bottom line. And because I know this fandom loves nitpicking someone's POV to find "inconsistencies" - yes, I am a lesbian interested in seeing a M/M ship go canon. However, I don't dwell on whether Tim & co. will "go there" re: intimacy of any kind. I don't need it to feel satisfied with their relationship. Just tell me they're committed to each other and I'll be happy. Canon!Buddie (for me) is about so much more than watching two dudes kiss/have sex or even having confirmed bi characters. (Tim could never define their sexuality and I wouldn't give a fuck as long as they were together, but then again, I am not bisexual and I understand that kind of representation matters to those who are. Empathy. What a concept.) Re: protecting/defending her BECAUSE she is a woman - 💯💯 you're right and you should say it! If the roles were reversed in the finale and Buck said "you didn't chase after me" he would have become fandom enemy #1 and everyone knows it. But because T*ylor "chose" Buck in the end, her behavior is seen as a good thing - finally! Buck is the one being *chased*! As far as the incident from Dosed is concerned...IMO, the fact that (so far) Tim & the writers have gone out of their way NOT to bring it back up is helping the T*ylor stans make peace with their love for her. We're supposed to believe everyone has moved on, right? There's no need to dwell on who she used to be when she's CLEARLY trying to be a better person. (Plot twist: T*ylor's past actions are gonna come back to bite her in the ass and lead to the end of BT 👀)

#anonymous #911 discourse #tv: 911 #tv: 9-1-1

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thegeminisage · 3 years

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hi, sorry for answering you both so late, i am putting your answers together since they are sort of related!

the short answer is, i can’t write a “real” sequel to broken road but the third part of the triptych would be the indirect dean/cas spiritual sequel, except with way more porn. the long answer is:

i just don't think i could write a true direct sequel to broken road set in that same continuity because i don't have anything left to say about john and how he gets along in the real with his family world now that he’s stuck there and they’re all stuck with each other. my main three points of interest that i felt were left unresolved would be the continuation of dean and cas's relationship (more on this in a sec), sam and eileen (ditto), and figuring out if john and mary ever made it work or called it quits for good. so if i wrote a sequel to broken road it would just be a bunch of john/mary stuff that i feel underqualified for because it WOULD involve their sex life and i DO NOT want to write john having sex. them fucking offscreen in broken road was as close as i'm ever getting and even that was weird. and then somehow i’d also have to work sam and eileen into that and it’s not at all related. it would take two fics and i don’t even want to write one. also, i really kind of want to leave the question of john and mary open anyway - i have my own thoughts about how things ultimately end up but i prefer to let the reader imagine what ending they like best, since people have such strong feelings about it. i know that's a little bit of a cop-out and i'm sorry! but it feels beyond the scope of that fic and also a little beyond my scope and area of interest as a writer.

if it helps you any, i imagine going forward their dynamic is a lot like it is in the epilogue, which is part of why i made the epilogue so long, was to give you a good idea of what life is like for them now. but here’s what i imagine might go down after the final curtain call (this is LONG, skip to the section labeled “dean” for the triptych answer):

john & mary:

john continues to suffer and bite his tongue and probably do a lot of complaining and DEFINITELY do a lot of avoiding being alone with dean or cas or dean-and-cas. john was expecting to retire after yellow eyes died so he really wouldn't know what to do with a family that still hunts for "no reason" and i imagine he'd be pretty pissed that they still hunt at all. i expect he and sam would butt heads over that

mary would probably keep attempting to be supportive and keep being bad at it, and spend a lot of time trying to put a brave face on it while secretly dying inside, because she's constantly at war with herself. here she has john back, but not the john she remembers, and spending time with him is difficult because she wants to let herself have him and take comfort in him and also she doesn't want to be anywhere near him because he abused their kids

eventually mary or john or both would have to leave, though mary would come back - in canon she's in and out a lot anyway, she stays for awhile and visits regularly for game nights. i think john would miss the first game night, get one "seriously?" text from mary, and then show back up every week that he possibly could but also not visit unless it would make things worse if he didn't. i don't think he particularly enjoys spending time with his family for a long time, if ever, because much like season 12 mary he came back to a family he barely knew or recognized (and because of what he knows now spending time with dean would be particularly awkward). HIS sons would be getting married to women and retiring and having biological children. this gay adoptive whatever the fuck makes them feel like they are not his sons.

anyway, i imagine john and mary would do much better when running into one another outside of the bunker, on their own separate hunts. they might even take one or two together. there’s probably some very guilty sex in their future at some point because mary is real fucked up. john post broken road does a lot of shutting up but i think around mary he would be the most like his old self. they do this will they/won't they dance for the next decade at least before finally making up their minds one way or the other. i do think they all still go on hunts together sometimes, maybe even with the apocalypse world hunters, and since that's sam's deal john is probably kind of quiet and falls in line and does what's needed without chatting much to anyone. i bet the first few times people don't even realize he's sam's father because he's so quiet. it's his way of trying to apologize to sam and also if he steps out of line when sam is in charge sam would <3 deck him. yes. but yeah i see it being very brisk and professional and awkward, until they all get used to each other again

sam:

as i said earlier the only thing i didn't fix in broken road was eileen, so at some point sam would figure out a way to get her back - since in this verse jack never becomes soulless and chuck never returns and we never get season 15 it's possible she shows back up because she didn't go with her reaper, or because someone fucked up a summoning spell, or sam realized she was in hell and decided to spring her, or she just crawled out on her own like a badass. i think it would be kind of funny if john was involved with her resurrection but maybe accidentally somehow, so it's not like oh sam learns to forgive his dad because john did this really nice thing for him it's more like UGH why did it have to be YOU why are YOU involved in this important thing that has nothing to do with you slkdjfghl but also if you hadn't done it she'd still be down there or something, so, it cancels out. or idk maybe john had to work hard at it or give something up to make it happen. he has to genuinely shut up and be selfless and not fucking complain and feel sorry for himself the entire time, that might be fun too. either way sam would not thank him

(though i do think sam deserves space to explore the fact that he loves john even still, even despite the fact that he also hates him/is very angry with him and always will be. i don’t imagine sam and john ever fully reconcile but i imagine john behaving BECAUSE OF SAM SPECIFICALLY offers sam more catharsis than he thought possible.)

anyway, john would be so relieved to see sam with a woman even if she is a deaf hunter but then it turns out she hates him like sam does so like. sucks to be him! meanwhile sam and eileen get to catch up and he finally has a willing ear (so to speak) that isn’t cas or mary to talk to about this stuff and of course SHE has someone who very much understands what it’s like to come back from hell. part of what i really love about sam and eileen is the way they sort of instantly and intrinsically recognized and understood one another, even across something that resembles a language barrier, and this hypothetical future would be no exception. there’s no way they don’t get engaged inside a year, and much like in the 15.18 fixit they’d sometimes hang at the bunker and sometimes not. i imagine with the apocalypse world hunters going in and out though it’s never exactly empty or lonely there.

whether or not their family unit ever retires and/or moves out of the bunker in this verse is sort of beyond me because my feelings on it change daily but you can imagine whatever you like! however i am adamant that the furthest away from each other sam and dean will ever get permanent-living-situation-wise is next door/across-the-street neighbors. their weird little codependency is part of what i like about them and i have a Whole Thing about not “gentrifying” dean. but for the most part sam would be very much doing his own thing which involves john very little, and healing from his own damage with people OUTSIDE of his blood relatives which he very much deserves. and he has moved so completely past the need to care about john that like john is a backdrop in his life, albeit one with baggage. but mostly he becomes someone to keep an eye on in case he makes trouble, no different than a hundred other surly hunters sam’s known. and he can still be there for dean without his life revolving around dean because now dean has other people there for him too. (i ALSO have a whole thing about sam being in the life for dean specifically, that he’s giving up some or all of adulthood for dean because dean gave up childhood for him - kind of the way someone takes care of their kickass single mom in old age. it’s a guilt/love/debt/devotion sort of thing.)

and speaking of the Eventual future, if babies ever come into this picture (sam and eileen’s, to be clear, dean and cas are probably satisfied with jack, NOT THAT JACK ISN’T ALSO SAM’S CHILD) john is allowed to see them but never unsupervised. i’m picturing like sam and eileen both on their third day of no sleep and sam lets john change a diaper because he’s exhausted and john considers that the best their relationship has been since sam was 6. mary always wanted to raise babies and sam likes her better so she’d get to pitch in with much more enthusiasm (and aw they’d finally get to bond a little more), and dean has raised a baby already so he’d probably try to like help and get waved away a lot like no no raising other peoples babies is no longer your job it’s ok. there is eventually a fight about this

cas & jack:

castiel lives a great life caring for his newly re-graced son and staring at john when he enters or leaves rooms, and i imagine eventually jack gives him his wings back, since he can do whatever the fuck he wants (i'm not giving jack his own section but he also probably keeps acknowledging dean and cas are a couple like out loud which would be fine except for dean is still half in the closet like a skittish traumatized cat so eventually cas would have to explain very gently that nobody was supposed to know that yet and jack should cool it to give dean time to adjust)

anyway i DON’T believe in human cas, i believe he likes being an angel, so he just gets to stay an angel forever and now he has wings too <3 and he can teleport which spooks john in the exact same manner it used to spook dean in s4 <3 except this time cas is being <3 malicious on purpose <3

cas fully won here because like john does NOT want to speak to or acknowledge him much less be in the same room as him so they tend to have a dynamic where like all 6 of them are in the room and cas dean sam mary and jack all talk to each other and john dean sam mary and jack all talk to each other but cas and john do not talk to each other. cas doesn’t have to threaten him or glare at him constantly anymore like all he has to do is look at him. and john is like. man what’s he gonna do. that guy is having sex with your son and there’s nothing you can do about it! so dean doesnt have to be like ok cool it cas anymore because cas has literally won in every possible way. i think at most it’s very much cas being like “if i were trying to kill you, you’d know it <3″ and john can’t return those vibes to sender because then dean would be like ok cool it at his DAD instead. it used to be cas don’t piss off dad and now it’s dad don’t piss off cas. anyway i think that since cas has let dean lean on him so much it would be nice if he could lean on dean a little. again more on that in a minute

dean:

and finally, as for dean...i think he needs a year minimum to dean with people acknowledging he and cas are a couple and another 3 for it not to be weird to say cas’s name in front of his dad. absolutely zero pda in front of john ever but he might like eventually get to the place where he and cas can lounge around together on the couch while they watch movies with the rest of fam and it’s not a big deal. sneak an arm around him at a movie theater. kind of the same vibes as the 15.18 fixit but with less anxiety. because like the worst possible thing (getting outed to everyone) has already happened and aside from the outing itself being completely horrible nothing that terrible even came to pass as a result, so he’s just Adjusting. i think he sort of has to unlearn and relearn his habits - his mediator thing, his defending dad thing. i think there’s a lot of times where he just walks out of a room when shit is too much for him to deal with because he has let go of some of the need to constantly micromanage his family’s interactions to make sure they don’t boil over. michael already took that scenario to the max and mary already dumped john so there’s really not much left to be afraid of. i think he gets told “that’s not your job” a lot and maybe listens more than he used to. and to bring us around to the second question...

i also think dean would get weirdly hung up on the fact that he and cas’s sex life is Not Normal - as in, they fooled around a little and that was it. i think dean would have a huge problem with that. like, obviously he has A Few Hangups About Gay Sex given his history but if you’re a couple you’re supposed to bang on the regular and it’s totally homophobic if he doesn’t bang cas as much as he’d bang a lady he was committed to, right? he’s not gonna give cas less than he gave cassie or lisa, that’s not fair to his best buddy and number one pal!

meanwhile castiel, known asexual, is utterly and wildly neutral to the whole idea except that it’s a way to be close to dean. cas would be just as happy fucking like champions for a six-hour marathon or spending that same six hours curled up in bed together while he plays with dean’s hair. like, same diff. you know that thing about like “cas thinks everything is important he gives the same gravitas to the apocalypse and a nine year old’s birthday party”? like it’s exactly like that with sex and cuddling and sharing a meal together and driving together and watching dumb movies like it’s all time spent With Dean so it all matters just as much.

so we have this conflict where dean is tearing himself apart over the fact that he’s taking a normal human amount of time to “work up” to the whole thing and cas is like. but it’s fine. it’s literally fine. and dean’s reaction to this would be something very offended like hello excuse me i am super hot and fuckable and you don’t WANT me?

if this all sounds familiar that’s because i’ve written similar stuff to it before! if you go to the fic page for broken road, you'll see it's part of a series now (the "triptych"), with my dumb little 15.18 fixit as the prequel. even though continuity-wise these are two totally separate fics i feel very strongly that that fic is the spiritual prequel to broken road, and eventually, a long time from now, after the next @cambionverse fic is done or at the very least well underway, i'd like to write a spiritual sequel. a triptych is three works that stand on their own but also make a more complete whole, so even though these three stories would not be related at all in continuity of where they take place in canon, they each set the stage at a different part of the dean/cas relationship. so fic #1, the get-together, had no sex at all, and it was very short. fic #2, pre-established but just barely, had a little sex in it and it was very long. fic #3 then would be pre-established but like VERY pre-established and have a fuckton of sex in it, and be medium length. i’m ha ha basically writing my own nc-17 porn coda since SOMEBODY won’t do it for me (if you got that joke you’re entitled to financial compensation).

except i actually really do want to tackle this subject myself, it’s stuff i only got to touch on in the other fics because it felt off topic, so in this fic it WOULD be the topic! i really found a groove i like with cas who has almost no trauma around sex but doesn’t care whether or not he has it vs dean who really really wants to have sex but has a minefield of past bad experiences he has to watch out for. and i like writing porn anyway and i didn’t get to write very much these past two fics. i’ve always said that i think dean would snowball (not like that, gross) - it’d take him FOREVER (literally a decade plus) to work up to kissing cas but a fraction of that time to start fooling around with him and a fraction of THAT time to blow him etc etc. the more he does the easier it gets. i feel like it’d be a lot of fun to write.

so, this third fic would not be an official broken road sequel, because there’s almost no plot outside of the porn to speak of anyway, but if what you wanted was to see how the dean/cas went from where it left off, hopefully that will be satisfying in that regard.

i should say, while the third fic would be almost exclusively porn there is one plot element involving ********** that i am not going to talk about on tumblr because it would ruin the surprise. i have told a few people privately and i will tell you if we know each other pretty well but if you know (or guess) don’t tell anyone!

see, the other thing i would want to tackle in that fic is how cas has his own traumas and baggage, even if they’re a little different from dean’s, and i think dean sometimes gets so deep in his own stuff he kind of...not forgets that exactly but forgets how profoundly it still affects cas, because by and large cas deals with that sort of thing a lot more quietly and in much healthier ways than dean does. not that his self-sacrificing ass is the poster child for mental health, but for example cas recognized suicidal ideation in himself and actively worked to keep himself away from situations that would make it worse. he translates his bad feelings into meaningful action (well, he attempts to, even if it usually goes wrong). so he hurts kind of quietly and in late season especially most of the worst moments of his life are behind him (barring jack’s death, which doesn’t happen in this verse). so he’s also further along in his healing process which mean dean kind of forgets how fucked in the head he can be. and in the uh...unusual situation...they find themselves in because of this minor plot, it becomes something that he can’t not notice, that they can’t just not talk about, and cas gets to lean on dean a little, they sort of get to know each other better. so that’s part of the point of that one little plot element. but the rest of it really is porn.

i haven’t started work on the third fic yet - i don’t have a title and my outline is just a bunch of choppy ideas and i have about 2000 words of the middle of the fic jotted down out of context. (it was originally going to be a shorter unrelated thing before i realized how well it tied to what i already had.) i have another obligation to see to before i can get started on it (again, @cambionverse, you should read it if you havent, the concept might sound unappealing but almost everyone who tries it likes it and it’s way better than broken road). so it’ll probably happen a very VERY long time from now! but it IS happening. >:) i just hope after the first two fics in the triptych were so well received that it doesn’t disappoint 🥺

#liz answers asks #anonymous #broken road #liz watches spn #liz loves writing #sorry this is such a long post i got carried away #i'm really excited about that third fic but i am more excited about other things first #but i don't want to get anyone else too excited until i have more concrete stuff bc rn i don't have much confidence in it #when i first conceptualized it i was like 'this is so weird and bad i will have to publish anonymously'#i've moved past that particular bit of self-doubt but only a very small inch lol #12:46pm

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

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Survey #411

“everybody’s got loaded stories, and i know for a fact everybody sees a bullseye on my back”

Have you ever been to jail? No. Opinion on snow? I absolutely love it! Not big on the slush it leaves behind, though. It gets ugly. What are you best at drawing? Meerkats. Are you scared of going over bridges? Nah. If you had endless energy and stamina, how would you spend your days? Plenty of exercise, lots of exploration with my camera, doing chores much more regularly... stuff like that. What mental or physical space do you go when you want to recharge or relax? I go to my room and watch YouTube. Did you have/use a comfort object as a child (do you continue to have one)? I actually don't remember. Now as an adult, if I go somewhere, my purse is actually like my comfort item in that I like to sit and sort of hug it to feel more secure. When was the last time you said something you regret? What did you say? I'm unsure. What do you tend to get carried away with? New hobbies/interests. It will be like all I care about for a long while, ha ha. Do you believe we have souls; do you believe in a life after death? Yes to both. Do you still talk to the person you last made out with? No. Have you ever seen your best friend cry? Ugh, yes, and it's the absolute worst. What kind of vitamins did you take as a kid? We had those Flintstones ones for a while, but for most of my childhood, we had gummy vitamins. Have you ever gone to court? Well, yes, but not for like your ordinary court hearing. While hospitalized on one occasion, a lawyer visited to speak to the patients informing us that we could argue against our discharge dates if we believed we were going to be committed for too long, which I thought I was, so I signed up to bring my case in front of a judge. So yeah, I've been to court, but not for ordinary reasons. Are you friends with your neighbors? "Friends," no. The people to our left like just moved out, and I don't even know if we've ever been outside at the same time as the family on our right. Favorite color? I like baby pink. How long has it been since you’ve seen The Lion King? I saw the CGI remake when it came out, if that counts? I don't know about the original. When did you last hold hands with someone? Sometime when I was at my sister's house, my niece grabbed my hand to drag me somewhere, ha ha. Have you ever had a crush on your sibling's friend? No. Have you ever gone to a beach? Multiple times. How good is your eyesight? It is very, VERY bad. I need new glasses severely. What’s the best wedding you’ve been to? My former dance teacher's. Have you ever had a negative encounter with the police? What happened? No. What’s your favourite thing to cook/bake? Do you eat it often? I don't do either. How do you flush the toilet in public? I generally use my elbow. I don't like standing on one leg, so I don't really use my foot like I'd prefer. Favorite horror movie? Silent Hill is dearest to me overall just because of what it is, but as a horror film, I think the original Blair Witch Project is best. Do you have your wisdom teeth? X-rays have only ever shown two are present, but I have enough space for those. What would you name your pet snake if you had one? It would depend on their appearance. The snake I have currently is named Venus because her coloration is similar to the planet. Do you like peanuts? Only when covered in chocolate. Where do you typically shop for bras and underwear? Do you tend to keep it simple, or have a variety of different items? Have you ever gotten a professional bra fitting? I don't get new undergarments (or clothes in general) frequently, but historically, my bras are bought online and underwear just from Wal-Mart. I don't really get the second question? I mean I don't have a style when it comes to those types of clothes, if that's what you mean. I've never had an actual bra-fitting, but I absolutely need to but keep putting it off. It seems like NO bra fits me properly all-around, and it's ridiculously annoying. What (if any) types of xrays/scans/other diagnostic tests have you had done? Was anything found? Idk man, a lot. I've had xrays on my wrist (found a fracture), teeth, legs... maybe more? I've also had an ultrasound on my liver for reasons I don't recall. I either had an MRI or CT scan (I can't remember which) when I got a concussion, and uhhhh... I can't think of anything else. Were you breast or bottle fed as a child? If you plan to have children, which do you think you’ll choose? Do you think one is really better than the other? I was nursed, and if I hypothetically had children, I'd definitely try to do the same. It was so incredible to me that I've never forgotten this: when I was at the hospital while my sister had her first baby, there was a chart on the wall of how many more nutrients were in breast milk versus formula milk, and the list was GARGANTUAN. Like, unbelievable. Now, do I think it's BETTER? That's a complicated question for which, in short, my answer is no. More nutritious, well, given what I just said, obviously. But breastfeeding just doesn't work for all mothers for a plethora of reasons, like the time demand, they can be self-conscious, it's painful... and all those things are okay. A mother should do what works best for her. Neither one is "wrong" or makes someone less of a mother because they feed their child less traditionally. Do you find that you have become more selective in terms of friendships as you’ve gotten older? Did the friendships you thought would last over time end up that way? Absolutely. There are just some kinds of people I absolutely do not tolerate anymore. And no, not most. We just drifted apart with time, or given most of my closest friendships are/were online, they just fell off the face of the earth. What are you doing right now? This and re-watching John Wolfe play Bloodborne. Bloodborne is such a comfort series to me... somehow, ha ha. Yet another game I've never played but desperately want to. Where are you? In my bedroom, as always. When you get yelled at, do you yell back or let it go? Depending on who it is, I might yell back, but most likely cry, ha ha. I hate being yelled at, like a lot. Is the person you last texted single? That would be my mom, so yeah. I've hoped she'd find a partner forever... She, probably more than anyone I know, deserves love from the *right* guy. I worry a lot how lonely she may become whenever I move out. Are you easily scared by horror movies? Not at all. Are you friends with any of your ex boyfriend/girlfriends? Girt and Sara, yes. Are you lonely? Be honest. Very. What has made you happy today? It's too early for this. What has made you sad today? Nothing, really. Last thing eaten? I had leftover pancakes from yesterday. Are you wearing anything that’s not yours? No. Do you like to wear makeup? I mean it makes me feel prettier, sure, but the actual time investment doesn't feel worth it for me personally. Especially when you're not even that good with applying it. Have you ever attempted to write a story or novel? Many times when I was younger. Would you rather have perfect hair or perfect skin? Perfect skin. I hate my skin, it has so many blemishes. What’s your middle name? Marie. How big is your bed? Queen. Do you drink? Only a bit for special occasions, really. I'll have a daiquiri on your average day every once and a blue moon. Would you fall apart if that last person you kissed walked out of your life? That's an understatement. Do you prefer pasta, salad, or coleslaw? Pasta. I hate coleslaw. Do you find smoking unattractive? Yes. Where’s the last place you went besides your house? The TMS office. Do you eat breakfast daily? Yes. Who were you with the last time you went to the movie theater? My dad. Do you like your cell phone? No, but it gets the job done. I just wish I had a phone with a good camera. Has anyone ever sang to you? Yes. So, what if you married the last person you kissed? That's the dream, but I acknowledge and accept it just might not work out like that. Do you usually answer your texts? Almost always. Have you ever changed clothes in a vehicle? Yes. Who has seen you cry the most? My mom, for sure. Have you ever just laid down outside and stared at the stars? Yeah, Jason and I did that one night on the trampoline. Have your friends ever randomly stopped by your house? In the past, yes. Think to the last person you kissed; have you ever kissed them on the ground? No. Do you have a condom in your room? No, got no use for one. Do your siblings ever pay for stuff for you? Yes. What brand is your digital camera? Canon. Do you own expensive perfume/cologne? No; I really don't get the point. When was the last time you went tanning? Ew, never. I find NO appeal in just lying in the boiling sun. Do you like the smell of fresh cut grass? No, I hate it. Do you get embarrassed easily? Like you would not fucking believe. It's one of the things I hate most about myself, because I'm embarrassed about everything I like and what makes me me. Has anyone ever thrown you a surprise party? No. Do you always wear your seatbelt? Absolutely. You couldn't pay me not to. Do you sing in the shower? No. Have you ever been called a slut/whore/something along those lines? Only playfully among friends. Have you ever stood up for someone you hardly/didn't even know? Yes. Have you ever fallen in love with a really good friend of yours? Yes. Do you own a blacklight? No. Do you like fruit better than vegetables? Definitely. Have your friends met the last person you kissed? Of my current friends, only Girt has. If you’re straight, have you ever thought about kissing the same sex? If you’re gay, have you ever thought about kissing the opposite sex? I'm bisexual, soooo. What does your laugh sound like? Do you have a loud laugh or a quiet laugh? Bro my laugh is so fucking loud and obnoxious. Is there a reality TV show you would consider taking part in? No.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''paranoiac personality'' by alice cooper

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writingkeepsmewhole · 4 years

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Explanations.

This is part 5 of Kitten. Sorry it ends weird this is harder to write then what I thought it would be haha. Let me know what you think please!

Fic Summery: Sophia has never known love, her always picking the “good guy” him always turning out to be like a snake in the weeds. What will happen when shes took home one night by a “bad guy” him showing her things she never knew about herself.

Part Summery:Dean give Sophia a bit of an explanation.

Warnings: Talk of BDSM

Let me know if you want to be tagged would love to add you: @vicmc624 @deanwanddamons @that-one-gay-girl @akshi8278 @loelizabeth100 @nihilismworld

Part 1 Part 4

The rest of dinner was relatively silent after that. Surprisingly, it wasn't awkward. Sam and Dean talked amongst themselves that I was thankful for. I wasn’t ready to start talking despite trying a few times since I was here.

The months of being smacked or hit every time I opened my mouth made me scared to even whimper.

I knew Dan wasn’t like that and I don’t think his brother was either but that didn’t convince my body.

Despite that both Dean and Sam would ask me questions always yes or no and would include me in their conversation as best they could.

I appreciated it but after the tenth shrug and twelve head nod I was wanting to go back to my room.

“Are you done?” Dean asks looking down at me picking at half of my first taco.

I nod at him, making him frown.

“Are you full or just scared to eat more?”

I shrug not really have an answer. My stomach was rolling. I couldn't tell if that was from being hungry or not wanting anything else inside me.

“One more bite and you can stop.” He says sweaty, reminding me of what my mom used to say to me when I was a kid.

‘One more bite Sophia and you can go play.’ I think in my mother's voice as I pick up the taco and take one more bite.

Dean smiles at me, making me blush. Him looking at me as if I really made him happy by eating.

‘Maybe he just likes watching people eat?’ I think smiling back at him.

‘But then again he wasn’t watching Sam eat so that’s not it.’

That thought goes out the window when the large door at the top of the steps opens. I never really thought about it until now. My brain always thinks you got in from the car garage. But there was clearly another exit.

The door slowly pushes open as a dark haired man wearing a trench coat walks in. He looks around, closes the door and starts walking down the steps.

“Well well well look what the cat dragged in.” Sam says, smiling at him getting up to greet the man with a hug.

“It’s nice to see you as well Sam.” The man says return the hug.

“What brought you here Cas?” Dean asks leaning back in his car sipping at his pop from the taco place.

“You know why.” This Cas guy says his blue eyes going from Dean to me.

“New pet?” He asks, cocking his head at me like a puppy.

“No.” Dean says calmly but it was clear he didn’t want that brought up again.

I dropped my head knowing exactly why Dean didn’t want anyone to think I was with him. Despite the weird names everyone kept calling me. Who called their partner a pet?

I wonder why he called me that but not long enough to get the answer or care too much about it. Cas saying something that got my attention.

“I need information.”

“Case got you stumped?”Sam says gesturing towards the seat next to him.

“You could say that.” Cas says, sitting down, a badge flashing on his hip as he does.

‘This guy is a cop?’ I think looking at him.

‘No, not a cop. Dressed too nice to be one.’ I think looking at the suit he was wearing.

His shoes were dress shoes and his hair was styed in that messy I woke up like this look. ‘Detective maybe?’ I think, settling that that was the best answer.

Dean glances at me, his brows wrinkling together. A wave of fear goes through me. Feeling like I did something wrong I drop my head and close my eyes waiting for him to hit me or start yelling.

“Sophia why don’t you head back to your room. I’ll come check on you in a bit.” He says softly.

Lifting my head up slowly I look at him to see him relaxed. Sam handed Cas the extra tacos he got. They are all relaxed.

No one was mad at me.

Taking a breath I nod and stand up.

I push my chair back in and head back towards my room. Once inside it I feel a weight lift off me.

No more talking, or eating, or people. Walking to sit on the bed I start to clean the stuff off the notebook still sitting there with my questions.

Picking it up I write down a couple that popped into my head at dinner then lay down.

I felt exhausted for some reason and all I wanted was a nap. Knowing Dean was going to come see me soon I settled for just sitting down and leaning against the wall. That was the last thing I remember.

I jump hearing the door opening, my heart pounding as the frightening images slip from my mind. I look at the door to see Dean standing there, his hand on the knob.

“Sorry just checking on you you.” He says smiling softly.

Smiling back I move to sit up. Laying over in my sleep state.

“Do you want me to leave?”

I shook my head that being the last thing I wanted him to do. I ignored being around Dean. He made me feel safe.

“Alright I’ll stay for a bit.” He says walking into the room and shutting the door behind him.

Walking to sit on the end of the bed like he did earlier today his green eyes fall to the notebook on the bedside table.

“You wrote down more questions.” He states picking it up.

I nod my cheeks flushing.

Instead of reading the questions out loud this time he reads over them and then sits down.

“To answer your questions from earlier. You don’t have to pay me back for staying here. You can stay as long as you want and I’m thirty. How old are you?” He asks looking at me.

I hold up two fingers then three telling him I’m twenty three.

“That’s not as bad as I thought I was guessing you were barely twenty.” He says chuckling.

I smile at his laugh, making my stomach flutter. It was nice to see someone happy.

“As for your other questions, the guy from before, that’s Cas. He’s a private investigator. He stops by from time to time when he needs help with a case. Now before you ask how we help him we give him insider knowledge on some things.” He says making me wonder what those things were.

“I won’t lie, some of those things are exactly legal but it pays the bills.” He says smirking.

He once again chuckles making my face wrinkle in confusion.

“You're cute when you're confused.” He says making me blush and look down.

It’s been a long time since someone called me cute. I think I was still in middle school. But it sounded different coming out of Dean’s mouth. I felt flattered being called cute.

“On to the last question. Why did he call you my pet? Well that’s what I call the girls I get into a relationship with. That is of course if they are one.” He says casually.

“There is that confused look again.” He says smiling.

I let out a huff hating that I was confused but he was talking in riddles again.

“Do you remember when we talked the day I took you back?” He asks, making memories fill my head. I nod telling him yes, I remembered.

Of course I remember it was the day I wish I could go back to and change my answer. The day I went back home to the devil himself.

“We talked about Crowely’s club Hell? The BDSM place.” He says slowly as if he is walking on thin ice.

I nod my head again wondering why he is talking about this.

“Well I’m a member of that club. It’s an interest of mine. Well more than that I live the lifestyle.” He says his ears turning red as if he was embarrassed.

“Gosh why is this so hard to explain? I guess because I know you know nothing about it.” He says his gaze jumping from me to the bed then back to me.

“I would tell you to look it up but it would probably scare you.” He says swallowing.

“I’m not like...normal people. When I’m with someone I’m not just dating them. We don’t just have sex or have a relationship. There are rules, punishments, rewards. Everything is talked about and written in a contact before we do anything with each other.” He says making my head spin.

I had no idea what he was talking about and as if he could read my thoughts he didn’t go on instead he backtracked.

“The night we met I was looking for a new submissive. I’m what they call a dominant. I’m also a caregiver, master and owner but we will get into those later if ever you want to talk about them but I’ll just explain the basics. That is of course if you want me to. I can shut up and we pretend this never happened.”

I shake my head, the curious side of me getting the better of me.

“You want me to go on?”

I nod and smile wanting to know what he was talking about.

“Alright.” He says smiling widely as if I just made his day.

“I’ll try to answer the questions I’m sure you’ll think of. Also tell me if you want to stop talking about this. Just hold your hand up. Alright?” He asks softly. As if he is scared of frightening me.

I nod, telling him I understand.

“Okay so where was I? Oh dominates and submissives.” He says with his eyes meeting mine.

“Like I said I am a domante, or dom for short. As a dom I would have control over you. I know that sounds scary but it’s not what you’re thinking. As I said we would make an agreement before we ever did anything. Also I’m saying this hypothetically I’m not asking or expecting you to do anything. Just explaining.”

I smile knowing that’s what he meant by we. Of course he wouldn’t want that with me. I was broken and used he wouldn’t want me.

“As the dom, I would give you a set of rules to follow. Once again that we would talk about beforehand. They could be simple like telling you to go to bed at a certain time. Or something more complex as me giving you a meal plan right down to counting out your peas for dinner. It all depends on what the submissive or sub needs or wants. Some want complete control, others just want fun play time.” He says smiling as if he was thinking of a fond memory.

“You asked a question about the kennel so I’ll really answer it. The previous sub hated it so I used it as a punishment. Hence why it’s still here. That room is what I call my play room. There is nothing else in it because new sub means new toys.” He says using his hands as he talks.

“As the sub you would follow my rules or get punished. If followed you get rewards. I know this isn’t for everyone. Most people just use it in the bedroom but I found that I enjoyed it in all parts of my life. Each dynamic is different. No two relationships are the same. That’s why I make all my subs sign a contract before anything happens between us.” He says smiling softly.

“You look confused again.”

I nod telling him I am. I knew what he was saying but I couldn’t wrap my head around it.

I reach for the notebook still on the nightstand and scribble out a question. He reads it then hands it back to me.

“A sub isnt your girlfriend but a girlfriend can be a sub. Like I said, me and Sam don’t have girlfriends. Our lives are dangerous so I would never agree to that with anyone. My subs would come here for the weekend, give me check ins through the week and that was it. We never went on dates unless that was a reward. Relationships are tricky.” He says making me frown.

Mostly because it made me more confused but also because I was picturing us together despite him saying hypothetically.

I nod my head, wanting him to know I was listening, a soft sigh leaving my mouth.

“Did I upset you?” He asks him looking worried.

I shake my head and shrug not knowing how to answer.

“Okay. Do you want me to continue?”

I shake my head, having enough to think about for the night.

“Alright.” He says this time he’s the one that sounds disappointed.

“I’ll let you go to bed.” He says standing up.

I watched him walk over to the door, my mind racing but despite that I knew I didn’t want him to go. But I didn’t say anything. I never say anything. I watch him open the door, looking back at me for just a moment.

“Goodnight Sophia.” He says softly then leaves me alone.

I sit there in the silence trying to understand what Dean had to say. My mind is full of questions. Laying down to try and fall asleep I quickly realized that was going to be impossible. I hated that feeling.

I stair at the wall as what Dean said replays in my mind. I wanted to know more but knew I shouldn’t ask. Even if I could. I thought about writing them down but got embasred by the thought.

Knowing that I wasn’t going to sleep any time soon I settled for coloring instead. When that started to become more aggravating than relaxing I topped and just looked at the ceiling. After what felt like hours my mouth got dry and my stomach let out a rubble.

I looked at the clock seeing that it was almost three AM. Chewing on my lip I wondered if anyone was up.

‘Would they get mad if I got up for a snack?’ I think fear fills my mind.

‘Dean said I could go to the kitchen whenever I wanted.’ I remind myself.

After arguing in my own mind for a few minutes another rumble settles the argument.

I get out of bed and step out into the dark hallway. Along the top of the walls every six or so feet were dim red lights guiding you through the large bunker.

‘Why do they live in a bunker?’ I wonder as I slowly walk towards the kitchen.

‘Dean said his life was dangerous, how?’

Thought similar to that play through my mind as I find my way to the kitchen. A light over the stove and table light the room enough that I can walk to the fridge.

I open it expecting to find leftovers and take out everywhere instead I find it's organized quite well.

Seeing pudding cups I grab one feeling like a little kid as I begin to sneak back to my room with it.

I stop when I pass one of the many book shelves. The topic of mine and Dean’s conversation coming back to mind as I see the four capital letters on the spine of the book.

My face grows hot as I pick up the book and I quickly rush back to my room.

Climbing into bed with my snack and book I flip it open shocked at what I see. Pictures of women tied up with rope and other things fill the pages.

Notes on the different knots or tools are written under each one. Some of the women are naked some of them are not.

This wasn’t at all what Dean talked about. This seemed scary and strange and I didn’t want anything to do with it.

Despite my fear I found myself reading more and more.

I practically jumped out of my skin when my bedroom door opened Dean standing there.

“Oh you're up.” He says smiling at me.

Blushing I nod and foolishly quickly hide the book I’m reading or at least try to.

“A little light reading?” He asks a smirk on his face as he walks into the room.

I open my mouth to speak but of course nothing comes out. My face is bright red I’m sure as he takes the book gently from me.

“Didn’t peg you for a rope bunny.” He says flipping through the pages.

I quickly shook my head not knowing what that meant but I knew I wasn’t one.

“You don’t want to be tied up like this?” He asks, holding up the book.

I shake my head again.

“Noted.” He says smiling and placing the book down on the nightstand.

“A rope bunny is someone who enjoys that by the way.” He says sweetly.

“It’s not really my thing either I rather have my submissive touch me if I’m honest. But enough about that I have a meeting and Sam went on a run. Just came to tell you I’m leaving.” He says standing up.

“Feel free to read anything else you want and of course use the kitchen.” He says walking towards the door.

“Oh I almost forgot.” He says, pulling a phone from his jacket.

It made me notice he was dressed in a nice suit.

He walks over to me and hands me a standard smartphone.

“I got this for you yesterday incase you need anything. Mine and Sam’s number are already saved. Feel free to call me if something happens.” He says smiling kindly.

I smile back at him and nod.

“Alright see you later Sophia.” He says leaving and closing the door behind him.

I take a deep breath and look over at the clock seeing that it’s 9 AM. I let out a yawn and rub my eyes wondering what I’m going to do with the rest of my day.

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softpine · 4 years

Photo

i’m sorry i got so behind!! i separated this into sections so you can find your ask easily 💖 also the rest of the what-if questions are in here if you’re interested!

STORY QUESTIONS:

she would definitely feel guilty still, for letting aileen leave even when she knew something bad would happen :( but at least she wouldn’t have the guilt of “failing” as a mom on her shoulders (i don’t think she failed, it was a mistake anyone would make, but that’s how she sees it)

omg i love leppelier!! but there probably won’t be anymore characters inspired by a separate peace (even finn has taken a life of his own and i see less and less similarities to finny every day), mostly because i like to think of my own characterization!! but everything i do is a tiny bit inspired by all the books/shows/movies/games that i love, so i’m sure there will be some inspiration thrown in there from a separate peace 💖

originally i said he was bi, but i realized it makes way more sense in the future if he’s gay!! so yeah he’s gay lmao!

that’s a really good question!! and it’ll actually be partly answered in the future, so i don’t want to say too much!! but ummm perhaps... maybe... asa DID hear finn.... 😬

i know right, poor bby :( if jo & owen hadn’t stayed together, i think they all would’ve been happier in the long run. it would’ve been hard at first, trying to figure out visitation & making sure owen has time to actually bond with jett, but once they got that figured out, they could’ve been great coparents and friends :/

fjksjd i hope you’ll like how everything happens either way!! 💗

it would be an entirelyyy different story sdjkdj i actually don’t even know what the story would be about if he couldn’t see spirits... i was tossing around the idea of having a gen focused on depression (i have depression and i thought maybe it would be nice to have an outlet to express it) but i realized it would’ve been too hard for me to write about on a daily basis. soooo yeah i have no clue what asa’s story would be without ghosts lmao!!

YESSS that’s describes her 100%!! 💖💖

@killjoytrait god i know right!! literalite blessed us all with an angel :’)

jksjd you’re actually the second person to guess this, but she’s just a random model sim! sorry to disappoint 😭 but i did make a hypothetical danny/mikaela baby here if you’re curious!!

when i got this notification all i saw was “i don’t want it to sound like i hate asa” and i was ready to FIGHT 🗡️ but this is totally fair!! i also love complicated family dynamics, and whenever i can make it complicated, i do sjdkjd but yeah it’ll definitely be interesting!! also fun fact, originally i planned for casper to be really jealous of asa once he found out that danny was asa’s “real” dad, not casper’s (especially since he wasn’t even legally tied to danny at the time). but as i developed casper’s character i realized it just wasn’t in his nature to be resentful like that. but i’m excited to get into the dynamic between casper/asa/Baby because of the age differences (casper will be 16 years older than Baby) and like you said, asa will have to adjust to being the middle child!!

thank you!! 💖 and mood sjdjkd

omg ofc i care!!! this is so cute!! i tried to find the song you mentioned, but it’s greyed out on spotify and it’s not on youtube as far as i can tell :( but i’ll try to buy the digital movie version when i can! anyway this made me really happy that you thought of them jsdkj ily 💖💖

HELP/ADVICE:

hmm well i kinda feel like i don’t have any right to talk about this subject, but at the same time it’s important, so... i’ll just say my opinion lmao but i’m not trying to talk over POC at all!! but honestly, diversity is a requirement for me to follow you. i don’t trust people who, like you said, will create all white sims and a couple racially ambiguous sims and then complain when people accuse them of a lack of diversity. using the excuse of “it’s just a game / it’s just my preference” doesn’t work for me lmao, it just makes me wonder why you would PREFER to play a game entirely devoid of people of color... there’s just no reason for it. i’m not creating diverse sims for “brownie points” or to please people, i’m doing it because that’s the world i live in? imo you shouldn’t have to think about it, you should just... do it.... lmao. and if someone calls you out for not being diverse, you should hear them out instead of getting defensive. like for example, a few months ago someone sent me a message asking if i would have any asian characters, and that was eye-opening to me because i hadn’t realized i was lacking in that area. so i made elaine and found a way to work her into the story, which ended up adding a lot of good stuff to my future plans!! so yeah that’s my opinion lmao sorry for the ramble!

i’m sorry, i don’t know what you mean? i don’t make build cc :( sorry!!

hey! you can definitely merge them! i merge almost all of my build/buy cc, just make sure that the packages aren’t too big (s4studio always gives me an error if if the file is too large, and if that happens i just split it in half). you can merge all of your custom content, but don’t merge your mods! (ie. you can merge hair/clothes/makeup/accessories/etc. but don’t merge game changing mods, like mc command center, ui cheats, etc.) i hope that helps!! and you’re not annoying at all bby!! 💖

i do!! it’s here! it’s not super detailed though lmao, feel free to ask if you need something specific 💖

hey!! i have some various advice here! but if you’re worried about copying... honestly don’t be lmao. since the dawn of time, we’ve all been recycling the same few plotlines & character types. as long as you put your own original spin on it (and you’re not directly copying someone’s story) i see nooo problem with using similar plot devices!!

NICE PEOPLE :’)

lmaoo thank you!! i actually love my supernatural posts, and i’m trying to keep loving them even when they aren’t as popular. but anyway, i really appreciate this!! sometimes i feel like a loser for how much time & thought i put into this silly story sjdkjd but then asks like yours make it all worth it!! thank you so much 💗💗

@carmeldreams ILY EM!! 😭💖💖💖

yes PLEASE come get this kiss....... sjdkjds 💗

@astralani YOU FIRST jskdjd ily 😭😭💖

@thesimparrot thank you so much zoe!! you’re so sweet 😭💖💖 i’ve been hoping that you’re safe and doing well 💗

@simsnectar thank you for thinking of me!! the same goes to you! 💖

MISC:

that’s true, i didn’t think about that 😭 you can see that i’m a pessimist lmaoo

@killjoytrait oh my god yesss this is literally what i believe! i don’t have a religion so i gotta believe in something, and the multiverse theory is so interesting lmao!

that’s very true lmao, there are some objectively bad choices for sure. i was thinking more like... what if my entire life would be different because i walked a different route to school in 9th grade or something fjskdj and what if my life would be way better in that case 😭

is this about the two trucks having sex meme sjdkjd

lmaoo i do the same thing, the office has taken over my life jsdkj

thank you for the recs!! 💖 i actually watch bella fiori sometimes, but sometimes i wish her videos were more detailed :/ she’s so cute though i love her sdjkd and i don’t know why i stopped watching eleanor neale?? i used to watch her all the time but i think i started disliking how sensationalized her videos were getting. like the one video where she put a picture of a suspect in the thumbnail, but that man was cleared of all wrongdoing and his name & face has been dragged through the mud for years... so that just put a bad taste in my mouth lmao but i’ll have to check out bailey sarian!

COVID-19 (you can skip the rest of this if it makes you anxious!)

i’m sorry you’re going through this :( i’ll be thinking about you 💖💖

yeah exactly!! i’m not worried for myself at all, i’m healthy and active, but i’m very very worried about accidentally transmitting it to one of my immunosuppressed relatives :(

thank you for this!! you take care too bby 💖

yiiiikes yeah it’s really scary!! every day it feels more and more dystopian here, and i’m in a state that only has 20-ish cases right now, which isn’t a lot. but our whole school system is shutting down, all the government buildings are closed, all activities/shows/movies are closed, people are clearing out entire grocery stores, etc. it’s freaking me out tbh.... i’m just hoping that if we all can quarantine ourselves properly, the hospitals won’t get overfilled, so everyone will be able to get the care they need :(

#soooooo sorry for taking so long #asks #anonymous #saviorhide #brandi answers

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unfolded73 · 4 years

Text

Top Five (1/1) - schitt’s creek ff

Reaction fic to 6x06. David and Patrick discuss the possibility of a threesome, and sexy time ensues. Rated Explicit, 3150 words. (AO3)

Other Season 6 reaction fics: 6x01, 6x02, 6x04

NOTE: This fic doesn't definitively say whether David and Patrick are ever going to incorporate a third into their sex life. It is pro-threesome as a healthy thing that a committed couple might do, however, so if that's not your thing, don't read.

__________________

The first several seconds after they were back in the car were quiet. Patrick pulled away from Jake’s building, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. “So that was an orgy,” he finally said, his voice flat.

“Mmm. A sex party of some sort, yes, it would seem,” David said. “Not exactly what we were planning on.”

“No. Because we…” Patrick felt the need to say it out loud without euphemisms about whiskey. “We were planning on a threesome.”

He felt David’s hand patting his thigh before it settled, heavy and warm. “We were planning on only doing what we were both comfortable with and no more.”

Patrick didn’t find that as comforting as David probably intended it to be. “I wish I knew what I was going to be comfortable with ahead of time. Deciding in the room with you and Jake or… or whoever is sort of a high-pressure situation.”

David didn’t say anything for a few seconds, but Patrick could feel his fiancé’s eyes on him. “You know I would be fine with never… if I find myself old and infirm and on my death bed and haven’t had sex with anyone but you for the entirety of our very successful, multi-decade relationship, that will be totally fine. That will be great. I love our sex life and I don’t need anything else.” He cleared his throat. “But I got the sense that the idea… appealed to you. And if you want to explore something like a threesome, then it’s like any of the other things we’ve tried together in bed. You wanting it makes it something that I’m going to enjoy. Besides, threesomes can be fun.”

“Maybe it would be good if you told me more about… that.” He gave David a sidelong glance. “More about your experiences.”

“Well, most of my experiences have been with a man and a woman? I’ve been with a few women who, once they learned I was pan, suddenly got very thirsty for a threesome with me and another guy.” Patrick rolled to a stop at a stop sign and looked at David’s smirk, and he could see a flicker of pain beneath it. Hints of a time when it seemed like people only wanted him for what they could get from him. “So I did that.” He fluttered his hand as if to dismiss those memories. “But I’ve been with two guys before too.”

“And what did you do?”

“Like, specifically?”

Patrick nodded. “It would help to hear details, I think, maybe to understand why it…” He huffed, frustrated with his difficulty putting it into words. He felt a little bit like he had near the beginning of their relationship, when the sex was new and the idea of what their bodies could do together was somewhat intimidating. It had made it difficult to put his desires into words. Patrick thought he’d mostly gotten over that, but here he was, right back in it. He tried again to verbalize it. “I do find the idea exciting, but also I still feel the way I did when you tried to get me to go out on a date with that guy, Ken — that I only want to be with you. And I’m struggling to reconcile those two conflicting feelings.”

“It’s okay to feel one way about it emotionally and another way about it physically,” David said.

Patrick smirked. “That sounds like maybe it’s just my dick that wants a threesome and I should probably ignore it.”

“Or maybe it should be something we only fantasize about together. Or maybe we should do it, but further down the road. You don’t have to ignore it.” Patrick pulled into the parking lot of his apartment building and turned the car off, turning toward David. “But anyway, as far as details go… sometimes there was just a lot of rolling around and desperate, sloppy handjobs. Or everyone lying on their sides, with two guys rubbing off against each other while the third fucked one of them in the ass. Spit roasting is a classic, of course. I’ve even seen men in, like — sixty-nine is the wrong way to put it, because when there’s three—”

“Okay, okay,” Patrick said, flushing at David’s laundry list of filth. “That’s… okay, I get it.” He pulled on the door handle, opening the door and getting out of the car.

“‘Okay, I get it,’ meaning nope, not for me?” David asked as he followed Patrick into the building and up the stairs.

Patrick focused on putting one foot in front of the other and tried to dissect the intense bolt of desire he’d felt when he pictured what David was describing. Part of it was the transgressiveness of it, of course, and part of it was the way it felt like another way to explore himself as a gay man. But most importantly it felt like another adventure in a series of ongoing adventures with David. A new way to enjoy sex with each other. And new ways to enjoy sex with David had always been intensely exciting when he first approached them.

He still hadn’t responded to David’s question when he was putting the key in the lock.

“Anyway, like I was saying,” David started babbling as he followed Patrick into the apartment and closed the door behind them, “we don’t have to do anything like that, or ever even bring it up again, for me to be totally satisfied in this relationship. So you can just ignore all that stuff I said, it’s fine. It’s, you know, it’s stuff from my past, and—”

Patrick pushed David back against the door, his hand firm on David’s leather-clad shoulder. “David, what you said was really hot.” He leaned in, dragging his nose along David’s neck, inhaling the body moisturizer that David had apparently put on specially, just in case. “I don’t know if I want to do those things, but I definitely want to talk about them more.” He felt his own lips quirk up in a smile against David’s neck. “Maybe now.”

David hummed, a rumble that Patrick felt in David’s throat. “What do you want me to say?”

Patrick bared his teeth, dragging them against the delicate, stubbled skin of David’s throat. “Fuck, you look so hot in all that leather, David.” He reached around and grabbed David’s ass, pulling their groins flush against each other.

“Yeah?” David’s voice was breathy. “You like it?”

Patrick pushed his hips against David’s, the sensation making him weak in the knees. “I love it.”

“I love the way you look in this new shirt,” David whispered, picking up the rhythm of Patrick’s hips.

“Oh yeah?” Patrick asked. “You like the shirt?”

David kissed him, deep and filthy, tongue plunging deep into his mouth. “I don’t care for the shirt itself, but I love the way your body looks in it,” David confessed. He trailed his fingers up Patrick’s arms. “I love every muscle in your arms. I love your shoulders.”

Patrick laughed, thinking about the constant presence of David’s hands on his shoulders. “I know you do.”

David’s hands came down and his fingers pressed against Patrick’s nipples, which were sensitive already from the way the silky fabric had been rubbing against them all night. “Fuck, and your chest. Your chest looks amazing. You’re so sexy.” He slipped a couple of the buttons from their holes, and then bent over enough to bite teasingly at Patrick’s nipple, making his hips thrust forward helplessly.

“You should talk,” Patrick said. “You look so fuckable.”

“I’m trying to look unattainable,” David said with an attempt at an imperious sneer.

“Unattainable by anyone but me.”

“Yes,” David gasped, hips grinding against Patrick’s.

Patrick paused, weighing his words. “Me, or anyone we allow to have access to us,” he said, guessing at what David might find hot about the threesome scenario.

The way David’s pupils widened told Patrick he’d hit the mark. “Yes.”

“If we ever do that, it doesn’t mean I want an open relationship. I don’t,” Patrick said, wanting to make that completely and totally clear, remembering their minor missteps with Ken.

“I don’t either,” David said, and Patrick let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding.

“Tell me what you and Jake would do, if we were together right now,” Patrick said.

“We’d want to make you feel good,” David whispered, continuing to unbutton Patrick’s shirt. “Make it a good experience for you.”

“It’s not just for me,” Patrick said, reaching up to shove the leather jacket off of David’s shoulders.

David gave him a crooked smile. “I know. Trust me, I would enjoy it too.”

They pulled their shirts off, pausing the foreplay long enough to get shoes and socks and pants off. For David in his leather pants, undressing required quite a bit of shimmying that Patrick found so amusing that it threatened to derail the mood. Patrick moved over to the bed and David followed, sitting down next to him and pulling him into another kiss. The mood very quickly began barreling down the tracks again.

“How does Jake kiss?” Patrick asked.

He watched as David pondered it, accessing his memories. “He uses his hands a lot, like this,” David said, putting his palms on Patrick’s face, fingers combing through the hair on the back of his head. He tilted Patrick’s head just so before moving in, licking into Patrick’s mouth in a rhythm that felt like fucking. “Would you let him kiss you?”

Patrick blinked, pulling back. They’d talked that afternoon a bit about hypothetical boundaries, but the discussion had focused on things below the belt — that handjobs and oral with a third were tentatively okay, but anal would only be between the two of them. Somehow they hadn’t talked about kissing. “Would that be okay with you?” Patrick asked.

David paused, taking the question seriously, and then nodded. “I think I’d like to watch someone kiss you. I’d like to watch you being kissed.”

Fuck. Patrick’s hand tightened where it had been resting on David’s thigh. “Then yes, I’d kiss him,” he said before their mouths crashed together, tongues meeting sloppier than before, every moment of it infused with the heady anticipation of newness.

David pushed and Patrick pulled until David was on top of him, hips cradled between Patrick’s thighs, chests pressed together as they writhed on the bed. “Were any of the scenarios I mentioned in the car… particularly appealing to you?” David asked between kisses, his cock thrusting against Patrick’s. “Or anything you were imagining we might do?”

Patrick felt his face heat up in a blush. “I’ve… the idea of you fucking me while…” He squeezed his eyes shut. “While I sucked someone off is… I’ve thought about it.”

David kissed him like he couldn’t not be kissing him after saying something like that. Then he broke the kiss, levering himself up and staring into the middle distance for a second, like he was mood boarding the rest of their evening in his mind. “Okay,” David said. Pulling out of Patrick’s arms, David reached into the nightstand and took out the lube, then he crouched down by the side of the bed, reappearing with a wooden box.

It hadn’t been long after Patrick moved into his own apartment that David had relocated his box of toys here, figuring there was little reason to continue to keep them under his bed at the motel. As Patrick watched with interest, David pulled out a decently-sized dildo. Not the biggest that David owned, Patrick knew, but similar in length and girth to David’s own cock.

“I’m not sure that me fellating a piece of silicone is really that hot,” Patrick said, assuming the intention was for the dildo to be the Jake stand-in.

“You’d be surprised, but that’s not my plan,” David said, lying down next to Patrick again, his hand settling on Patrick’s stomach.

“So… the other way around, then?”

David nodded. “I know I don’t have Jake’s insane abs, so you’ll have to use your imagination.”

Patrick was used to David’s self-deprecating comments about his own body. “You know I love your body.”

“I know I saw the way you were checking out Jake’s body.”

Patrick didn’t rise to the bait. “I wasn’t the only one.”

David grinned. “Okay, that’s fair.” He reached down, skating past Patrick’s half-hard dick to his thigh, pulling on the back of it until Patrick’s knee was in a deep bend. David slicked his fingers with lube before reaching around, teasing at Patrick’s hole. “Who would you want to get you ready?”

“Just you,” Patrick gasped. “That’s just for you.”

His grin widening, David massaged Patrick’s rim. “Just for me.” As he slid in a finger, he asked, “What would Jake be doing?”

Patrick’s dick twitched. “He could… put his mouth on me, on my… my chest.”

Humming with approval, David leaned over to do just that, his teeth scraping across Patrick’s nipple as his finger worked in and out of him. He kept it to wet drags of his lips and teeth, frustratingly gentle, until he pulled his finger all the way out. When he pressed back in with two, he took Patrick’s nipple into his mouth and sucked sharply. Patrick cried out.

David used every trick he knew, curling his fingers and pressing in while he continued the onslaught on Patrick with his mouth, leaving red marks in his wake. Patrick’s need climbed and climbed, his hips shifting to pull David’s fingers deeper, to get more. He brought a hand down to his own cock, desperate for friction, but David batted it away. “Not yet, sweetheart.”

Whining, Patrick bucked his hips. “Please, David.”

“You want me to fuck you?”

Patrick nodded, his eyes squeezing shut.

“Okay, I’m going to fuck you.” David’s fingers slid out of him and then he heard the lube again, before he felt the press not of David’s skin, but of cold, unyielding silicone. “Imagine this is me,” David whispered, slowly pressing it inside, filling him up. Patrick focused on relaxing and taking it, his mouth seeking any part of David’s skin he could reach.

“Yes, David,” he groaned, the sensation of fullness tingling up his spine.

“You take me so well, Patrick. I love how badly you want it.”

“Want you. Always,” Patrick gasped as the last inch slid inside him.

“Okay,” David said, and he picked up Patrick’s hand and guided it down to the flared base of the toy. His intent was clear, and Patrick pulled it out a fraction of an inch before pushing it back in, the motion triggering all of the nerves inside him to fire with pleasure. Patrick opened his eyes and watched as David straddled his chest, shifting forward carefully until his cock was poised at Patrick’s lips. Patrick reached back with his free hand and adjusted his pillow to elevate his head a bit. “Ready for me?”

Patrick nodded, more than ready.

David braced himself against the wall with one hand and took Patrick’s hand in his other, effectively preventing Patrick from touching his own cock. “Close your eyes and imagine I’m… anyone you want.”

Letting his eyes slide closed, Patrick opened his mouth, his tongue flicking out to lick the slit of David’s cock before David shifted forward and filled his mouth with it.

Patrick sucked like his life depended on it, still fucking himself with the dildo with short thrusts, and imagined what David instructed him to. Imagined it was David fucking his ass while Jake fucked his mouth. No, while Sebastian Stan fucked his mouth — it was a fantasy, no reason not to go for broke with it. He scrolled through his mental file of hot men before settling back on Jake, the person they could conceivably do this with if they really wanted to. He thought about himself at the mercy of two men using him like this, taking their pleasure from him. He imagined the way David looked when he lost control and fucked his ass hard, chasing his orgasm and coming inside him. The thought made Patrick whimper around the cock in his mouth.

Without anything touching his dick, Patrick didn’t think he could come, but the sensation of fucking himself while he had a dick in his mouth was holding him on the precipice for so long that he thought it might drive him insane. He was so out of his mind with pleasure that he barely noticed when David groaned and came, spilling down Patrick’s throat with a few shallow thrusts of his hips.

“Need to come,” Patrick rasped as David’s cock slid from his mouth. “Let me, please. Let me.”

“I’ve got you, honey.” David shifted off of him, then licked his palm and closed a fist around Patrick’s straining cock.

“Oh, fuck,” Patrick almost shouted, hips coming up off the bed as David stroked him. It couldn’t have been more than four thrusts into David’s fist before Patrick was coming, all his muscles going tense, his toes curling and eyes rolling back with the intensity of it.

Patrick was floating inside his mind, only barely aware of David carefully pulling the dildo out of him and disappearing, presumably to the bathroom to clean up. He lay perfectly still, breath slowing with every inhale and exhale, body humming with delicious feelings.

The next thing he was aware of was the sensation of a warm, damp cloth as David gently cleaned him up. “Good?” David asked.

“Top five,” Patrick said, his voice shredded.

“You’ve told me ‘top five,’ like, a hundred times,” David said a crooked smile on his face.

“And every time it was true.” Patrick said, his mouth sliding into a grin. “You just keep topping yourself.”

David snorted. “There’s a joke somewhere in there but I can’t think of it.” He pulled the blankets up over them both, curling into Patrick’s side. “So I wonder what the actual top five are.”

Patrick hummed, thinking about it. “The night I proposed. The last time you tied me up.” He tried to think of another stand-out orgasm, but a lot of their time ran together now, all of that wonderful sex with the love of his life. “I dunno.” He rolled, slinging an arm over David’s waist and nuzzling into his chest. “Looked at another way, the top five are probably all in our future.”

“Mm hmm.” He could hear David smiling. “Maybe one or more of them with a special guest star?”

“Maybe.” He looked up at David. “I’m not sure. I think I need some time to mull it over.”

“Of course,” David said, kissing his forehead.

Patrick yawned, snuggling close. “Let’s table it until after we’re married.”

“Okay. That sounds like a good idea. I love you.”

Drifting between sleep and wakefulness, Patrick mumbled. “Love you too.”

#schitt's creek ff #schitt's creek fic #david x patrick ff #david x patrick fic #david x patrick smut #sc s6 #sc spoilers #my fic

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trickstarbrave · 3 years

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I see some of my old posts abt this getting likes still so I did feel the need for whatever reason to post an update or rather restatement to my views on the topic

I know this is a horribly tired topic that was discoursed to hell and then left behind and for good reason so as a warning: ace discourse below

First and foremost I’m not in the business of telling ppl wholesale they don’t belong in the community. The vast majority of ace ppl are also other various lgbt identies and trying to “remove” people from the community is not a thing I’d ever advocate for nor have I really ever as far as I can remember. If I have in bad faith I would like to extend an apology bc I have bad memories problems and think those actions are wrong and harmful. If the consensus is ace ppl are lgbt then I’m not here to say everyone else is wrong and I’m the authority on lgbt identities. We are a coalition group, a mashing of communities w sometimes shared histories and experiences. Even if I think ace and aro ppl don’t have as many of those in common I don’t get to decide if they are or not. They are now and I’m more focused on making that work

Still though since it’s inception the ace community has not been a very healthy one. As at best a newer addition to the lgbt community being brought to light and given a label and community, the community has been toxic. Much of the foundational moments for identity were from the AVEN forums and a lot of harmful misogynistic, transphobic, homophobic, and ableist things were said on their and supported. This kind of behavior has continued well into the community even today.

This is not a moral judgment on asexuals or aromamtics. I’m aromantic. I was also subjected to these things. I always felt alienated from the community. Even when trying to engage behavior was half the time welcoming and understanding and half the time felt very hostile. I point this out because again: many asexuals and aromantics are other lgbt identies and this rhetoric is very harmful. It’s alienating. It makes you feel guiltier at times. Furthermore at times the community pressured ppl who did not have absolutely any desire for sex in any capacity to be okay with it, as though they were on the same level as people who liked and enjoyed sexual acts removed from sexual attraction to people. Sometimes it encouraged harassing people for saying having sex was a vital part of relationships for them and they felt incompatable with someone who was repulsed by sex and didn’t feel abstaining for a hypothetical ace partner would be healthy for either of them. Even more alarming was qpp’s, really originating from the aro community, spreading and simply being a tool for a while in many circles to coerce people into relationships who otherwise wouldn’t be okay with polyamory or were underaged. I’ve seen so much harm and been subjecting to it that I did have to (and still want to but avoid it for stress reasons) point this out. Even more alarming was during the discourse era seeing big name ace bloggers with large underaged followings bring on self admitted pedophiles to their blogs, and refusing to apologize when said pedophile admitted to sexually harassing minors. Lies were spread to demonize lesbians especially, and to a degree gay men as well, including that we steal funding we don’t need

As well (currently) the lgbt community hasn’t had the best resources to provide a good environment for ace and aro issues, and the ace community has not made it a priority in many spheres to curate those spaces either. As an aro sexual abuse victim there were many times I didn’t want to see public displays of affection or hear abt sexuality of any kind at times (despite not being ace) and I knew asking for those to cease in lgbt spaces would be harmful and come across as bigoted. Lgbt spaces are places to express your comfort in your identity and your relationships in the way cishet ppl can whenever they want to in society. Seeking out spaces without that just meant retreating and being alone. A curated space for aro and ace ppl would have removed tension I know many people have had and still do experience by providing refuge for sex and romance repulsed ace and aro ppl

I felt more boundaries would be beneficial, as while trans people are no doubt a part of the lgbt community (regardless of how many trabsphobes say we don’t belong), trans specific areas and communities still exist. Trans spaces where trans experiences are centered are a priority. The ace community regardless needs better spaces for ace people besides social media and Internet forums. It needs structure and accountability. It needs to unlearn harmful practices and bigotry that have run rampant for their own members’ sake, not for the sake of outside people to see validity in it.

And for a while, people who were otherwise cisgendered, heteroromantic and asexual would speak out in lgbt spaces about trans and gay issues because this is the “same community”. Cis gay men have no authority on lesbian, bi, or trans issues. Cis lesbians have no authority on gay men’s, bi, or trans issues. Cis heterosexual trans ppl shouldn’t talk abt lgbp issues w authority. Cishet ace and aro ppl shouldn’t talk those either. A lot of the hostility and early discourse was abt that, about those bloggers who very quickly left the discussions and website entirely in some cases, speaking about issues that shouldn’t concern them. About homophobia and how it should be treated or tolerated, using slurs they had no right using, and more. Even more alienating was ppl saying a character was ace rather than gay, and when pointed out they could be both it resulted in backlash as trying to take away ace representation, and then real human survivors of sexual abuse who were dead were framed as ace icons and ace representation while framing their discussions of their reactions to sexual abuse as “the ace experience”. Lies spread that ace conversion therapy was a thing and that doctors were going to hold you down and feed you medicine to make you want to have sex, terrifying many young bloggers on this website who genuinely believed and lived in fear of this happening until they were told it was misinformation and lies.

(Yes you can be sexually assaulted for being ace, yes victims of sexual abuse can as a result ID as ace or aro, that’s not what I’m arguing against in case somehow someone finds a way )

But from the other side I’ve seen and spoken out against people who just said bigoted things. Claiming there were too many gender and sexuality identities. I think the split attraction model is limited to ace and aro ppl to explain our identities more coherently and misapplying it to others only servers in the end to stigmatize various sexualities, but this went beyond that. For many people “grey” and “demi” modifiers are useful. I’m grey aro. My romantic feelings are complicated and inconsistent enough I think it’s not average. Sure to a degree “anyone” could be demi or aro and many ppl in the ace community have misattributed those modified identities to ppl who didn’t even fully explore how they felt, but they are not worthless. I can count to you how many times I’ve felt genuine romantic attraction, and I do not fully understand the intricacies of romantic attraction, nor the differences at time between platonic feelings in practice. I was mocked for my identity several times and saw people with identities like mine mocked. This was not a discussion of it these identities were harmful like claiming disassociating during sex was a normal sexual identity. At worst they are unnecessary.

I’ve been always more invested abt having a better community for ace and aro ppl bc that’s what I ultimately wanted. No, they didn’t have the messy intertwined history of other lgbt identities but also they didn’t have to be. Lgbt or not there wasn’t a space for ace and aro ppl I thought was really healthy. It was either they existed there in a group with other people with their issues being talked about or not at all. Ace pride colors were based on the at times toxic forum website AVEN. The aro community was often overlooked by ace ppl or at times actively thrown under the bus.

And lies and misinformation was still spread. Pieces of history incoherently being co-opted and misappropriated to seem legitimate. And to top it all off ace and aro specific oppression was incoherently discussed to. How different forms of oppression work together and often feed into each other or take new shapes was ignored. Studies were extremely limited in scope, loaded, and mostly inconclusive. Facets of misogyny and even homophobia were framed as ace exclusive and unique experiences, and people lied about real life discrimination for being ace (usually these were young people like the 15 y/o who claimed to have two gay dads who kicked her out for being ace, so I won’t dwell on those as much. Tumblr has been a weird website). Discussions of race especially were riddled w terrible behavior from white ace bloggers who resorted to lying, shaming, and guilt tripping. All this only serves to fan the flames and drive a wedge between communities even tho inclusionists claimed it was all evil exclusionists doing while refusing to call out the misinformation and bigotry they often spread. There was no purpose in harassing bloggers of color, no purpose in terrifying children so they lived in fear of medical professionals and most ppl, and no excuse.

Hopefully moving on from this it will truly die away, but I hope people learn from it. This wasn’t just as some ppl frame it cis gay and lesbian bloggers starting a harassment campaign to try and kick aces out on a large scale. This was a messy discussion that was years brewing until it exploded in even more vitriol, misinformation, and rage. It became an opportunity to critique an (albeit in comparison young) community for harmful behavior that was going unchecked and lead to even further bigotry, misinformation, and alienation. And the bigotry and misinformation didn’t serve a purpose and little understanding of what ace and aro people needed besides information and education to the public, which was already taking place before this, was had. And ultimately I expected more from the community at large.

To ace and aro followers and readers: I’ve seen some ugly parts of the community but I don’t necessarily demand you answer for that behavior, unless you’re personally guilt of it. I don’t say this because I have a mission to prove you’re bad. I think the community is toxic, but it will ultimately not get better unless ppl who are dedicated to it are willing to help find what resources ppl need, provide it, and refuse to encourage or call out shitty behavior. And ultimately that will come from a place of love and desire to create an environment future generations will feel welcomed in. I just don’t want other ace and aro kids being lied to about what they’ll experience, subjected to homophobia and transphobia of many colors, and at times groomed by adults. And I don’t want it based around just social media where anyone can lie abt credentials and act like an expert to further any of those horrible goals, even unintentionally

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rosalesbeausderholle · 7 years

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"it's still attraction based on sex?" are you kidding me? did you ever saw that said sex part of a post-op tw??? I did and it's NOTHING like a vagina. I mean the appearance, the smell... nothing. LG makes actually good points and I don't even know why we still discussing this and it's not even saying who people should date it's just stating facts about human sexuality jfc.

I wasn’t talking purely about genitals, I was thinking about someone clothed, that’s the situation I was imagining. I’ve seen pictures of neo-vaginas so yes, I know what they look like, and I can’t personally speak for the smell but it makes sense they’d smell different and I’ve read accounts from lesbians who’ve slept with post-op trans women saying that the experience does feel very different so no, I’ve never claimed it was 100% the same, or that any lesbian has any obligation to sleep with a trans woman, ever, regardless of transition status. Or that exclusively wanting to be with other females (just like I do!!!) is something bad or bigoted. The fact that you think I do is honestly laughable (hi!! lesbian who was made suicidal by the cotton ceiling discourse nice to meet you!!) And obviously the same goes for gay men.I wasn’t even entirely disagreeing with lgunity, I do agree with the main point that someone attracted to both sexes is bi (duh) but rather stating that there /are/ some people (however small their number) that can effectively pass as the opposite sex, and that I don’t think that if any gay person thinks they’re hot that that makes them immediately bi, like what the gay person in question would be liking here is what they /look like/ rather than what they /are/. In the case I was imagining, if a lesbian found herself thinking a passing trans woman is hot, the only reason she’d EVER be able to feel that attraction is if the trans woman looks female, meaning has at least secondary (because in my scenario everyone is clothed) female sexual characteristics and THOSE are what the lesbian in question is attracted to. So yes, she is attracted to someone she sees as the same sex because of how her body is (even if it’s a body altered by surgery) and if that lesbian is not attracted to any other males (be it cis or non-passing trans women or whatever) then I don’t think her being able to think a post-op trans woman is hot means she must immediately be bisexual. Maybe she is, maybe she isn’t but in my view it doesn’t necessarily have to be the case (and whether she is or isn’t is up to her to find out not me) And in any case, she is still not obligated to sleep with this or any trans woman, ever, nor with anyone else, EVER and she has a right to pursue only people she actively desires.The fact that the moment I question something or imagine a hypothetical (on the tags of a post no less!!!) you come to me all enraged honestly just highlights my problem with radfems, you hate genderists for hunting people the moment you question anything and yet?? Here we are lmao.

Also "I don't even know why we're still discussing this" then don't come and discuss I was just adding my thoughts (on the tags) on a post, a post that I agreed with! Like???

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marvelandponder · 7 years

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Rainbow Power, Y’all

Happy (belated) Pride month, everybody! I’ve been wracking my brain trying to think of how I wanted to talk about gay ponies. Mostly because I literally never shut up about it so writing a opinion-based Should MLP Have a Gay Couple? editorial would be kind of self-explanatory. Kind of really self-explanatory.

Plus, we already have one. Lyra and Bon Bon might have to chant “best friends” a hundred times before they can make goo-goo eyes at each other, but that body language and even just the way they talk to each other in is pretty telling.

Damn, that’s pretty gay.

Oh and also this happened last year on the official Facebook apparently:

God, I love this show. Taking into account the fact that the other two are married couples, this is a Valentines Day promotion, and that making someone’s heart “gallop” can’t really be misconstrued as platonic, I seriously love this.

So, I mean, I can’t exactly stop you from interpreting them as platonic, but I would consider them canon and I’m even glad for the subtlety. Not all depictions need to state the obvious, so long as it is obvious.

I think with these two the intention was to make it ambiguous enough for parents to decide if they want to explain the concept. Kids aren’t stupid, but I think the demographic won’t pick up on the context clues that this could be a romantic relationship when they’ve been primed with the words “best friends” a number of times.

So, at that point, it’s up to the parents who watch the show with their kids to decide (if they haven’t already) if this is how and when they’d like to explain the concept of a same-sex relationship, with this as a visual aide. If Lyra and Bon Bon end up being baby’s first gay relationship, so to speak, that’s awesome.

So, if I’m so satisfied with those two, why write this? Why push for more in an already accepting climate, especially when an effort has already been made? Isn’t that greedy? Or exploitative? Has my shipping brain finally lead me down the road to delusion?

I hear you answering yes to that last one, but I’m just gonna ignore that.

As to the question, it comes down to the word choice. I’m not asking if it should be done---it’s already been done. I’m not asking if Hasbro would allow it, because whether or not they’d show a lot of support, they have shown some.

I’m asking how it could be done with the intention of explaining why it would or wouldn’t add something of value.

Because the landscape of children’s television is changing rapidly. From the time Friendship is Magic started in 2010 until good ol’ 2017, the number of kids’ shows that have incorporated LGBT+ characters and couples has only grown exponentially from before.

On top of that, I’m a little biased in my perception, but I’m not the only one whose noticed that this year’s pride month has been the most visibly celebrated yet. For better or worse, the amount of companies trying to support the LGBT+ community during pride has only grown.

This year’s Amazon Pride float was Rainbow Dash and MLP themed in Dublin. Don’t know if Amazon got Hasbro’s permission to use their character in a parade, but they gave her a horn because unicorns apparently are gay (just as a rule) and now she’s an alicorn.

By the way, they totally messed up those flags. If it had said My Little Pride, they could’ve been selling thousands of them. To me. Wasted potential, I tell you.

And again my bias showing: I can’t speak for other regions, but where I live all public schools, from elementary to universities and colleges, have rainbow pride flags flying.

All the schools I’ve gone to growing up are now flying pride flags for a full month.

That’s... I can’t tell you how heartwarming it is to see. And my elementary school services kindergarten kids all the way up to grade 8---some children as young as 5-6 years old are now growing up with that being a natural part of their environment throughout their entire childhood.

When we were growing up and I think in a lot of places around the world still, there was a question of when it should be taught to kids and whether the concept alone was age appropriate, but little by little, that’s just not the case anymore.

From their shows and media to even some of their schools, more and more kids are learning about this in a natural way from a young age, to the point that it is just love and it is just who these people are to them. And for once I mean it when I say I think that’s beautiful.

But things evolve like this at different rates in different places, so we’re not perfect yet, and the push for more is out of a desire to see the progress continue and for more groups than the ones that are typically represented.

Would I be heartbroken if this was as gay as MLP ever got? Nah (besides, through the power of denial, all my ships are already canon!). But at this point the question is starting to become why not? instead of just why? so even if this remains a hypothetical discussion, I think it’s still an important one.

I’m going to forever cherish the subtlety of those Lyra and Bon Bon scenes, but it’s the first pride month that I’ve been out and I feel like celebrating. Let’s get gay.

Love in Friendship is Magic

Right off the bat, I think it’s important to establish that we’re not trying to change the show fundamentally. It’s about friendship, and while other relationships are shown to be deep and fulfilling as well (family and even romantic), the show’s focus on how meaningful friendship is great.

But here’s my thing with the “this show is about friendship!” argument. It’s not like we don’t already have other types of relationships. Several episodes have been dedicated to developing purely familial relationships.

And even beyond the platonic, Spike has (had?) a crush that factored into the plot of a few episodes, Big Mac now seems to have an on-going relationship, and there are a few prominent married couples. This stuff exists largely in the background, comparatively, but it’s not like romance doesn’t have a place in the show. It just doesn’t surpass the focus on friendship.

So, yeah, just because they have a romance doesn’t mean it has to take over the show, nor should it.

If we were going to go the route of canonizing an LGBT+ couple, that would still be something to take into account.

It doesn’t mean that main characters can’t have a romance necessarily, just that they should work in a friendship lesson along with it.

If Starlight and Trixie were dating for instance (she said, as if it was a random example instead of her ship), a story would probably mostly center around their friends helping them through relationship troubles or preparing for adorable dates. Or, on the flip side, their friends learning the lesson of when not to interfere.

Or, now that Starlight’s cutie mark is on the map (indicating that other ponies can be called if necessary), perhaps a couple could be called to solve a friendship problem instead of two friends.

Basically, so long as there’s still some element of friendship, the writers can introduce a new kind of relationship and develop it in tandem with the friendships already present.

Or, as there is in The Perfect Pear (without giving spoilers beyond what the summary said, for those waiting for the US release), we could just have an episode with a bigger focus on a romance.

Notice how all these scenarios aren’t dependent on the idea that this romance be queer. I’m a bit torn on this issue, because I can see both sides, but I think I usually lean towards the idea that because there ideally doesn’t need to be a difference between straight romances and gay romances, there doesn’t need to be a story reason for them to be gay.

Like I said, I do see the appeal of stories that require the couple and/or characters to be queer, but there’s pros and cons to either side.

We don’t necessarily need to see a story dealing with homophobia in Equestria, in part because that contrasts so much with the Equestria we already know. It’s too loving. It took 4 seasons to address Scootaloo’s disability not because no one noticed, but because everyone accepted her for who she was (aside from DT and SS). It’s not like homophobia or hatred can’t exist in this world, but it’s just not widespread.

A really good reason to include romance in general and even “different kinds of love” so to speak is to give Cadence more screen-time and development.

I’d love to see the Princess of Love guiding her subjects! She could even help a character come out, which would be both a reason to have an LGBT+ character and/or romance in the show, but also make the concept relatable to young kids---a story about accepting who you are and what you love makes sense to them.

I think there’s definitely potential to take this in interesting places, develop pre-established characters and relationships, and all without stealing the focus from friendship too much.

Who Wins the Dreaded Shipping Wars

On the right, Ashleigh Ball posting a fanmade picture of an AppleDash wedding for World Pride Day. On the left, IDW comic writer Jeremy Whitley arguing for FlutterDash... either way, I’m down for this.

Fan expectation is a funny thing.

We both crave for the show to address what we’ve long speculated on, and dread it.

In the case of the Apple family’s parents, there’s been countless emotional fan-theories, stories, and ideas, and yet The Perfect Pear remains one of the most anticipated episodes (for those who have yet to watch it).

With Slice of Life, we were surprised to find some headcanons confirmed and celebrated, but also some destroyed by canon.

I think when it comes to confirming LGBT+ characters and relationships, it’s really no different. We all have different ideas about who these characters are, and those of us who ship have ideas about who they might like.

So, yeah, even if we went down the road of confirming minor characters as LGBT+, if we already know them, it would likely step on a few toes. But honestly I’d rather step on those toes than introduce a new character for the sole purpose of them being gay. Sorta boils them down to just one purpose/one “trait.”

And in the end, as much as it sucks to have your ship sunk or your headcanons burst into flames, 1. If we never wanted the show to establish new things about these characters, why continue watching? and 2. My friends, I’ve been a shipper for a long time and I can say from experience: a ship doesn’t sink even when canon contradicts you. Denial and imagination are a fan’s most awesome tools.

Oh and would you look at that, my transition is here.

Love in EQG

Just as a sidenote, because of what I ship, I’ve said before that I think the Equestria Girls franchise would actually be a perfect place to include LGBT+ relationships because the series already has a heavier focus on romance than the show.

If you’re going to have these high school drama romance subplots, which is a staple of the series now, might as well go ahead and make it gay! *Cough* Sciset still makes the most sense from a storytelling perspective *cough*

Queerer than Ever Before

I wanted to include a section like this because it’s something we’re still working on in animation as a whole: representing more than just gay and lesbian relationships.

I’m happy to report bisexuals and in and out of relationships are also now getting more love, but that’s about where the buck stops. Steven Universe has the closest thing to trans and bigender or androgynous representation, which is mostly not literal. As in, they have fusions of two different characters, and characters like Garnet who feel better in a different form, but as of yet there’s no straight up trans or non-cis-gendered characters.

BMO from Adventure Time could certainly count as gender-fluid, though, so it’s not all bad news bears.

Pansexuality and asexuality have yet to be represented in children’s animation (in adult animation, Rick Sanchez of Rick and Morty is canonically pansexual, though!) aside from Spongebob being confirmed to be asexual off-screen by the show’s creator “because he’s a sponge.”

We’re largely still figuring out how these people and more groups I haven’t even mentioned ideally should be represented, but trying is still the first step.

For example, Big Mac’s not trans, but while I reaaaally didn’t love that his cross-dressing was a joke in Brotherhooves Social, I can also appreciate the fact that everyone around him was aware he was originally a stallion but let him compete in the Sisterhooves Social anyway, a trans issue we’re still debating in reality.

So, the comedy of the episode is kinda transphobic (not because Big Mac is trans, he’s not in canon, but because the comedy comes from him being in drag), but once again Equestria itself proves to be a really accepting, tolerant place.

And I think it can be hard to know how to represent these voices well (there’s also the fact that MLP theoretically could hire on a guest writer, as they do now every season, if they wanted to specifically have someone who’s non-cisgendered tackle a story of that nature), but hey, why not be the first to try? Wouldn’t it suit the show’s loving nature to be inclusive?

LGBT+ in Equestria

More and more these days it’s becoming the norm to include more ways to love others and oneself in kids cartoons. You could argue not every show needs to have LGBT+ inclusion, which I can agree with, but by the same token and especially for shows with an expansive world, no serialized ongoing plot to adhere to, and focus on love and acceptance already, the show doesn’t need to be entirely straight, either.

Ask why not, instead of just why.

There are ways to make romance relevant to the target audience without teaching them they need it to be happy, and there are ways of explaining these concepts to them without forcing a political stance. For kids, it’s simple. Love is love, and you are who you are. That’s really all there is to it.

I’d be over the moon if the show ever had the chance to represent more than they already have. In the same way I wanted to Applejack’s parents to be dead, I’d ideally want to see how MLP specifically would deal with this hard topic with its usual kindness, gentleness, and love. As in the former case, I think it has the potential to be something wonderful.

In the end, though, I of course can’t say if we will ever see more, or exactly would or should it would be handled.

I suppose we can only hope to follow Lyra and Bon Bon’s example.

Other MLP stuff? Oh yeah, I’ve done that! I’ve got more editorials like this one over here, and episode reviews over here. But because plain old links aren’t pretty, have the last three things I’ve done with purty pictures:

Dr. Wolf Theory Reading, Parental Glidenace Review, and Celestia/Daybreaker Editorial

Year of the Pony

Visuals in this Post Wouldn’t Be Possible Without...

Pinkie Pie Vector by MPNoir Flag Vector by JayBugJimmies Lyra and Bon Bon Poster by BronybyException

Art from talented artists, what could be better? Hit up those links and check out their awesome galleries!

The Real Agenda Here is My Shipping Agenda

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aaroneousblogs · 4 years

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Hypothetical question: What is your gender? Hypothetical answer: Male, Female, bisexual, gay, etc. Hypothetical judgement 1: He said he is straight, but why does he move like that. Hypothetical judgment 2: He is gay?!? he looks so masculine and buff. Hypothetical judgment 3: She acts so boyish and is clingy with her girl best friend, I think she is lesbian. Before, I would generalize the word “GENDER” to explain a person’s overall sexual identity. Growing up in a Christian- Chinese school, I was not that exposed to sexual/gender identity. We grew up believing that there are only two gender, Male and Female--just like how it is written in the Bible. Yes, there were some gay students back in high school but they were only like 3 out of 350 in the batch so we really did not really quite ponder in to it. People just generalize those three students as gay, in which case I find unfair. Come to college in Ateneo, wow everything just changed. (MY LIFE IS A LIE!) There are more gays and lesbians than I expected. Sexual/Gender identity is Very Complicated! ( I was legit clueless about this) Some friends act really well in showing how manly they are then will open up later on that they like fellow men. While some friends act very girly and will later on open up that they have feelings for his girl block mate. it is quite confusing for me at first, until I tackled the Grinder Bread Person Model in my Social Science class.

Sexual Identity ≠ Gender expression ≠ Gender ≠ Sexual Orientation. The ginger bread model explains everything, I finally get it!

Now, I wont dwell in much about the explanation of the model because you can google it easily.

But, I am just saying that the Ginger Bread person is a whole new revelation for me!

Okay, I shall proceed to my Ginger Bread Evaluation.

Name: Aaron Cheng Gender Identity - I see myself as a man. No doubt I am clearly a man and forever will be. Anatomical Sex - Male. no signs of female organs or genes as of the moment. My mom wants a girl but when she saw my “patotoy” in the ultra sound she went to the CR and cried. all her Children are boys. Gender Expression - Some people think that I am gay. So I i think i sometimes unconsciously act girl, maybe because I am “malambot”? I am also uncomfortable to like show 100% masculinity on things.

Attraction - Romantically and Sexually Attracted to girls. I would commend a guy friend for being handsome today but i am certainly not attracted to them romantically or sexually. I am sexually attracted to women but i never had sex with them. I am romantically attracted to women but i never had a girlfriend. The irony LOL. This is me as a Ginger Bread Person. How about you?

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

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Survey #323

“dehumanized upon a shell / we came to bleed it dry / obsessed with divine wealth / divide and multiply”

Have you ever drawn on someone’s face while they were sleeping? No. Would you scuba dive in shark infested waters if you had the chance? No thanks. What is your favorite slow song? There are so many, but one of the slowest and most beloved of mine is "Obstacles" by Syd Matters. It gives me goosebumps without fail. It's one song I know I want at my hypothetical wedding. If there were aliens on earth, would you be afraid? I mean, yeah. I'd want to know their intentions. If your best friend died, would you be able to speak at their funeral? It'd be extremely difficult, but if I had any say in it, I absolutely would. Do you enjoy going through old pictures? Sometimes. Other times it causes too much pain, depending on the pictures, of course. Do you tend to have a lot of drama in your life? Definitely not. My life is painfully uneventful. When’s the last time someone was disappointed in you? I don't know. Do you have a house phone? No. Which fast food place do you eat at the most? McDonald's. Have you ever met someone on the Internet in real life? Yep. What’s your favorite color to wear? Black. Do you like being in pictures? No. Do you travel a lot? Essentially never, even though I'd love to. Do you play any sports? No. Do you like pickles? Yesssss. How many times have you been kicked out of a store? Never. Is there things you’ve told someone that you’ve NEVER told anyone else? Probably. When was the last time you had alcohol? My birthday dinner last month. Are you one to often make typos? No, except when I'm texting. I have autocorrect on for a reason. On a hot day, would you rather prefer ice cream or a popsicle? Ice cream. Have you ever wanted to get drunk and get your mind off everything? Yes, but I just didn't want to drink anymore at one point. I'm far from a lightweight, apparently. Have you played cards recently? No. Is there a band you like with amazing music but a bad vocalist? Mother Mother immediately comes to mind, but not the main singer; he's great. The woman who occasionally joins in is fucking horrendous. Like, it hurts my ears. Is there a certain song you like to headbang to? I don't and never have really headbanged, surprisingly. It's a sure-fire way to make me dizzy. Anything you might be giving up on soon? I hope not... Sometimes I feel like it's time with photography, but I just. Can't. Have you ever captured a moth? I've raised a caterpillar into one before, then of course let it go. Is there a band/artist who has strange lyrics but you love them anyway? Otep, noteably. When was the last time you wore earrings? It's been a long time. How many pairs of heels do you own? I don't think I have any. When was the last time you changed your picture on Facebook? Uhhhh it's been at the very least a month, but I know more. Would you consider yourself to be physically strong? Absolutely not, especially my legs. I struggle to fucking walk because they're so weak. Have you ever painted a piece of furniture? Yes, actually. I helped Jason paint his shelf black. Do you have a really fat cat? No, we never have. We've always been good about keeping our pets at a healthy weight. Do your initials spell a word? No. When was the last time you went to a playground? A year or so ago when I was taking pictures of someone's son, as well as just general family photos. That same family just had another baby the other day. Have you ever made a business card for yourself? No. Do you have a favorite curse word in a different language? No. Are there any recipes you have memorized? No. Do you know your multipication times tables? Lol not most of them, no... It's been way too long. Do you have a favorite font on the computer? Of the basic ones, probably Garamond. Are you good at creating logos? *shrugs* I've only ever really made my photography watermarks, and I only JUST made one I like pretty well. How about catch phrases? I don't make those. Have you ever been severely burned? Not severely, no. Did you ever dream that you had a baby? I've actually had numerous dreams where I was pregnant, but I don't THINK I've had one where the baby was born yet. Do you or anyone you know have a rabbit? No. What was the weirdest thing you ever saw cross the road? Hm, nothing too weird, I think. Last song you got stuck in your head? "ALTÆR" by 3TEETH. Last song you listened to? ^ Favorite movie quote? I don't know. Maybe Rafiki's quote about the past hurting, but you should take that opportunity to learn. Favorite lyric? That is impossible. There are so, so very many that just like slather me in goosebumps. What magazine are you an avid reader to? None. Have you ever gone a full day without interacting with another person? I have. How many relationships have you been in that lasted less than a year? Four. Have you ever been significantly more physically fit than you are now? Man, take me the hell back to my WiiFit days. I was pretty damn fit. The last time I did it, it was seriously alarming how much I struggled doing things that were once pretty effortless. When growing up, did you parents keep the house very tidy? "Very" seems a bit too much, but Mom definitely kept it in order. How many watches do you own? None. Should teenagers be allowed to have their cell phones with them in class? Yes. Emergencies happen. Do you have any gay relatives? Yes; my mom has a cousin who's gay. Have you unfollowed, deleted, or blocked anyone on social media recently? Not recently, no. If so, what was the reason? ^ What’s the biggest financial mistake you’ve ever made? Oh, y'know, dropping out of college three fucking times. Once I pay my own bills and I truly understand finances, that's going to fucking wreck me. Do you like metal music? Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck yeah. If so, what sub-genres of metal do you like the best? Heavy and symphonic. Who was the last person you sincerely thanked? My mom for bringing home lunch recently. Have you ever been in a relationship where there was a large difference in maturity levels? No. What’s the longest you’ve ever stayed as a guest at someone’s house? Maybe like a month when I was technically homeless? How bad was your acne when you were a teenager? It was preeeetty rough. Do you like strawberry shortcake? No. What’s the last you got out of the freezer? A microwavable breakfast bowl. Do you go on the computer or watch TV more? Guess. Explain why you are single: Because I'm a very, very underdeveloped "adult" that has very little clue what she's doing. At my age, I and any potential partner should want someone with direction. What feature do you usually get most complimented on? My hair. Has anyone ever accused you of being gay? Well, I'm bi. I had this weird therapist once in middle school though who asked if I was a lesbian... Idk why she did? What Facebook groups have you found the most helpful? I'm in an advanced ball python husbandry group, and while a lot of people there are utter, degrading elitists, they do have valuable information. Did you name all of your stuffed animals and dolls? I sure did as a kid. What would you have your bridesmaids wear? Probably black dresses, and I think it'd be really cool if I were to marry a woman, the bridesmaids wear checkered Converses colored into a rainbow pattern, or something like that. Where do you want to go on your honeymoon? I think Alaska, if it was a good time to see the Northern Lights. Are you sick right now? No, thankfully. Do you feel loved? Yes. Do you like your butt? Why or why not? God no. I have such a flat ass. Are you ashamed of your faith? I'm assuming by this you mean religion, in which case, I don't have one and am not ashamed of that. Has anyone ever tried to force their beliefs on you? Yes. Have you ever personally been a victim of homophobia? Again, I'm bisexual. I have never had a personal act of homophobia inflicted upon me, though. Have you ever been accused of being homophobic? Yes, because I was for most of my life. Fucking repulsive to remember. "Repulsive" is much too gentle a word, but yeah. It is so, so embarrassing to recall myself ever believing it was wrong because my then-religion said no-no. Do you think you’d be happier if you had a pet? I have two pets. I would be so, so lonely without any. :/ I've had pets my entire life. Who was the last person you went on a date with? Sara. How long has it been since that last time you went on a date? Like two or so years. Do you think babies are cute? They can be, but I usually don't find them all that cute, honestly. Especially newborns/very young infants. They're usually hideous. My youngest niece is actually the only newborn that I remember seeing that I thought was absolultely precious. What is your favorite style of pants? Ripped skinny jeans. Were you ever hospitalized as a little kid? No. Who was the last person who broke your heart? Jason. ^Do you still miss this person? I'm sure I always will to some degree. Do you have someone to talk to and share your secrets with? Sara more than anyone, but Mom, too. Is there someone you feel extra shy around? Just men in general. Have you been hurt more by friend break-ups or romantic break-ups? Romantic. Closest living thing to you? My snake's terrarium is against the opposite wall. She's in her hide. Would you rather drown or burn alive? Drown. You go unconscious first, so. And I'd assume it to be faster than burning alive. Also me no like hot. :'''( Who is the last person you got really pissed off with? My stepmother posted some ignorant bullshit on Facebook about how people blow out of proportion our "supposed" environmental crisis. I nearly deleted her right then and there. I take that shit seriously. Most of her beliefs drive me insane, honestly, but she's a wonderful person at heart, so I just bit my tongue. Who was the last member of the opposite sex you laid in a bed with? Girt. What type of sushi do you like to eat? Never tried it, don't want to. Was the last person you kissed physically attractive? Yes. Do you have any flowers in your room? No. Do you know anyone that owns horses? Yes. Well, I took pictures for her family, anyway. Do you know anyone who has road rage? Who? Jesus, yes. My little sister. Is your mom a big health freak or your dad? Or neither? Neither are "big" health freaks, especially not Dad when you consider he smokes and knows it'll be what kills him. My mom is diabetic though, so she's reasonably careful. Do you know anyone who wants to be the president one day? No. What kinds of chips are in the cupboards? We don't have any. Ma tries to keep snacks out of the house for both hers and my sake. If you were going out with your celebrity crush, what would you wear? OH BOY idk. I'd probably spend days planning the "perfect" thing. Do you have any friends who have naturally red hair? I do. Have you ever cried when a teacher retired? Yep, my band teacher. He was incredibly loved by literally everyone. Do you have your mom’s or dad’s eyes? Neither's. They both have brown eyes. What’s the best date movie? We gonna have a problem if you don't watch The Notebook w/ me if I have it on lmao. How long has your current best friend been your best friend? Many years now. (: Do you swear and yell while playing video games? I might swear under my breath, but I don't yell. Would you rather name your daughter Andrea or Eva? Andrea. If you were adopted, would you want to know? Yes. Do you know anyone who has grossly skinny eyebrows? I couldn't care less about someone's eyebrows. Do your pets chase after bugs? Oh yes, Roman certainly does. When’s the last time you were so excited you couldn’t sleep? Why? Hmmm... this actually happened recently, but I don't remember why... What is your mom’s favorite movie? I don't know, actually. I think it's some romance one. What TV family reminds you of your own family? None, really. Do you know anyone who always looks perfect? Who? One of my best high school friends Alon was like... just always pristinely beautiful, it seemed like. I haven't seen many pictures of her lately, but I'm sure that hasn't changed. Has anyone you know ever pulled the fire alarm in school, joking around? I think so once, yes. Who was the main character in the last book you read? A dragon named Sunny. Who are the last people you saw kiss? On the lips, I'm sure it woulda been my sister and her husband. Would you rather look at clouds or stars? Clouds, I think. Well, it would depend on their design, I guess, and time of day. When you get married, who will be the maid of honor/best man? Probably my mom. Does your best friend get along with their parents? She has a wonderful relationship with them. Have you ever been in a wedding? What were you? I was the fat, hideous, crying bridesmaid. ;x; Are you purposely hiding something from someone? No. What’s the most intimate thing you’ve discussed with a stranger? My suicide attempt with doctors. What, if anything, do you substitute for fries? I always get fries. Have you ever been in a building that was on fire? No. Are you in an argument with anyone right now? No. Have you ever written a poem for someone? Yes. Who’s the last person who cussed you out in anger? My grandmother. Who is the person you are closest to that you’ve meet online? Sara. Have you friended your parents on FB? Mom, yes. Dad doesn't have one. What’s the last tourist area you visited? Chicago. Mice or roaches? Mice are precious, meanwhile I hate roaches. Did you give or get any Valentines this year? No. Well, Mom bought me and my sisters each a delicious candy apple, if that counts? What’s your homepage? Google. Is there anyone whose grave you visit? No.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''altaer" by 3teeth

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surveys-at-your-service · 5 years

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Survey #197

“she wraps those hands around that pole, she licks those lips and off we go, she takes it off nice and slow ‘cuz that’s porn star dancin’.”

Do you wear something on your left hand/wrist/arm without fail? I have a ring on my left thumb. What is the latest you’ve stayed up for? Why? Oh idk, if you mean staying up waiting for something in particular and not just staying up all night for the hell of it. I think WoW's Warlords of Draenor expansion launch was the latest; it was sometime at night, between midnight and 3 A.M., and. Between me, Jason, Amanda, and Jacob, I by far stayed up the latest and pretty much died that day asleep. What is an article of clothing you would never ever wear? Rompers are just a no for me. What is something you lie to yourself about? I don't really do that anymore. If I know the truth deep down, lying would do me no good. Do you enjoy solving problems? NO. All problems do is stress me out. Are you more books smart, street smart, or random trivia smart? Oh, totally trivia. GMM taught me the most pointless shit. Are you a kinesthetic, an auditory or a visual learner? Kinesthetic. Would you ever take part in a TV quiz show? If so, which one? If not, why? No; I don't want my ugly ass on TV, the stress would murder me, plus I'd be really nervous and awkward. Does it take a lot for you to cry, or does it happen easily? It is VERY easy to make me cry. Do you have two of the same pair of pants? I believe I do. Who gives the best advice? Sara. She neeeeeds to do something in the psychological field. Do you have a lot of pictures of you and your friends? Old ones. I pretty much never take any now because 1.) I hate my face and 2.) what friends? What’s the hardest decision you’ve ever had to make? Truly and entirely letting Jason go. Who do you usually see in your dreams? Sara, my parents, sisters, and my theory is the lingering effects of PTSD keep Jason as a pretty regular fixture. HA HA OH YEAH MARK IS ALSO IN THEM SOMETIMES. Generally though, I don't remember my dreams. When was the last time you cleaned out a bathtub? Literally never. Never been a chore. Would you rather read poetry or write poetry? Write. Have you ever had any really infected injuries? Not really infected, I think. That cyst was, but that's not really an "injury." Is there any band out there that you like every song by them? No. Have you ever cussed/swore in front of younger children? If so, did they eventually imitate what you said? I'm sure I have with legit babies, but even then, I would try avoiding it. Now, I'm super careful around any aged child, and no. Do you have any friends that you almost always joke around with? Alex and Chelsea. Serious moments are almost non-existent, especially with Alex. Have you learned any new words today? No. If your hair never got greasy again, would you still wash it? Well yeah, it would still get dirty. When was the last time you played jump rope? Not since being a young teen... Talk about your first love. I think everyone in my online circle knows the story. High school sweethearts, strong and steady relationship that pretty much everyone thought was permanent, but ended very abruptly. Know now that it's for the better it ended; who the hell knows, maybe I'd still be an extremely depressed and hopeless mess. What’s the most beautiful songs you’ve ever heard in your opinion? "The Two Trees" and "Dante's Prayer," both by Loreena McKennitt, are unreal. "Obstacles" by Syd Matters? Goosebumps every single time. Okay really I could go on forever. What kind of self care is your favorite to do? I get the most satisfaction out of skin care. Are you affectionate? With s/os. I'm a hugger if I know you well enough. Who do you look up to? Mark, Steve Irwin, I look up to some parts of Otep Shamaya despite her mostly being a bitch, Sara, and there's so many more, but I'm blanking atm. Do you do art? Using what (pencil, watercolor, etc)? Usually a mechanical and colored pencils. Do you dance? What style of dance? Not anymore. Favorite old film? A lot. But probably Johnny Got His Gun. What weather is the most beautiful, in your opinion? Snowy. Do you have a lucky number? No. Have you ever wished on a star? What about on a fallen eyelash? No. What’s the most beautiful thing in life, In your opinion? People coming together for good, despite any differences or grudges. What instrumental sound is your favorite? Violin, electric guitar, or piano. What’s the best song a friend has ever introduced to you? Ohhhh idk. "Wolf In Sheep's Clothing" is high on the list, thanks Sara. Favorite shoe you own? Some converse with a skull design. Do you know any German words? Yeah, but I've forgotten quite a lot. Four semesters of German have definitely faded a bit. Do you have a passport? No. Do you say any words that are pretty specific to your area? Well, "y'all' for one. There's definitely sayings, though I'm not gonna sit here trying to remember 'em considering I don't use much, if any. Do you know anyone who everyone thinks is gay, but is not out? No. Vegetables: better raw or cooked? Are there any raw veggies I like??? Have you ever smoked? No. Would you mind dating someone significantly shorter than you? I've said it before and I'll say it again: I have a significantly negative opinion of you if h e i g h t fucking matters to you. Can you quote the movie Mean Girls? All I know off the top of my head is I think "On Wednesdays, we wear pink" or something like that. Do you live in the state you were born in? Yeah. Do your parents smoke? Dad does. Do you know anyone who has a ton of real fur clothes? No; at least I fucking hope not. If Britney Spears came to your town, would you go see her concert? In the hypothetical case of it being free, sure thing. I wouldn't actually go out of my way buying tickets. Have you ever worn a pair of leather (fake or real) pants? No. If the last person you kissed asked you to marry them, what would you do? She wouldn't ask that anytime soon. I'd only be comfortable being engaged if we were settled somewhere and the relationship was in a perfectly healthy place. When you believe in the Easter Bunny, what did you think it looked like? I don't remember. What about the tooth fairy? I think I imagined something like Tinker Bell? Do you/did you have a religion class in school? No. If your best friend got cancer, would you shave your head with them? If she was truly self-conscious of it, I probably would. Name someone you know who is Buddhist. No one, I think. Does your mom wear makeup? Very little for only special occasions. Do you kiss your boyfriends/girlfriends in front of your parents? Yes. Have you ever spent Christmas alone? No, thank Christ. Have you ever spent your birthday alone? Not all day or anything. Does your favorite uncle have any children? I only know one of my uncles well enough to have a confident opinion on him, but anyway, yes. Has anyone ever kissed you when you were so not expecting it? Possibly? Was it a good surprise kiss? Or bad? See above; I'm not sure if I was ever totally taken by surprise. Name all the members (first, middle and last names) from your favorite band. Man, I used to know this shit 100%, but I only know now Ozzy himself. Do you still have any Pokemon cards? I don't believe so. What would you do if your favorite artist came to town but your parents wouldn’t let you go? i'm???????? about to be 23????????? Do you know anyone who refuses to swear? Probably. Not anybody I know well. Have you ever heard a young child swear? Yes. Have you ever heard your grandparents swear? My grandma, yeah. But she does so seldom. What do you see when you turn your head to the right? My closet. The creepiest, most disgusting insect in the world is: Hissing cockroaches omfg no. What is your opinion on sex without emotional commitment? No. Where’s the best place to eat a romantic dinner? Olive Garden is the answer to everything. What will you dress up as for Halloween? Idk, but I reeeaaally wanna do something this year. Have you ever been in a lighthouse? No. Do you ever make your own surveys? Not exactly; I only combine them and usually delete the "no shit," boring, overused, or incredibly specific questions, like, "does the # 79 mean anything to you." What color is your shower? White. When is the last time you had a serious talk with someone? Yesterday about Bentley. I think Mom finally sees we need to get rid of him. How often do you take naps? Sometimes every day, every other, or just sporadically that week. I generally function better and am in a better mood with an afternoon nap. I know you don’t wanna talk about it, but when do you go back to school? Who the fuck even knows with my piece of shit past school. I was planning to this month. Do you find that you have a certain meal you eat every time you go to certain restaurants? In like... *every* restaurant. I don't want to order something I wind up hating. Have you ever had anything stolen from you? Maybe? When was the last time the power went out at your house and how long was it out for? Not too long ago I believe thanks to the wind. Just briefly. Ever had to get any stitches? Twice. How many times a year do you go out of state? Usually not even once a year, though now with Sara, it'll probably become a regular pattern of twice or so. About how many times during the night do you wake up from your sleep? Always, always, at least once. What kind of surveys do you wish there were more of? The deep, philosophical ones. When are you getting your next new phone? Ugh, probably not soon, though I need one desperately. Are you due for a haircut? No, got that done yesterday. Are you dealing with any health-related problems right now? Mental, we already know, but I've got some physical too currently. Do your parents like the music you listen to? Some of it, but I know Mom's not into the heavier stuff I like, and usually not the more indie stuff I'm into it. Do your parents approve of your beliefs? Dad, I don't think we agree on most, and Mom, she does some, while not others. She'd probably punch me if she learned I'm pro-choice now. Do you know anyone who’s racist? Very. What about a homophobe? Welcome to good 'ole North Carolina, my friend. What about a pedophile? They wouldn't be alive if I knew a pedophile. Who’s the most annoying person in your neighborhood? I dunno who, but there's one person on our street that has loud music playing almost constantly, even at night. You can't hear it indoors and it's not blaring outside, but I find it disrespectful to the few people who live here, especially at night. And mind you, the music sometimes isn't friendly to be playing where all of us can hear it. Name one of your psycho exes? No one. Why were they a psycho ex? N/A What’s the best revenge you ever got on someone? I don't see it as bitter "revenge" anymore, but it's chuckle-worthy every now and again to remember he broke up with me due to depression, and now I beat that shit and am working hard to stand on my own. How often do you shop at dollar stores? Only for candy for like, going to the movie theater. What’s your favorite part of a song? Usually riffs, choruses, or bridges... or guitar solos... lol idk it just depends on the song. I'd say maybe bridges the most. In school, do you/did you work better by yourself or in a group? BY MYSELF. When is the last time you ordered from a catalog? I personally never have. What’s the name of the gas station you last stopped at? Idr, it wasn't one we normally stop at 'cuz we were out of town. Is there a piece of jewelry that holds any sentimental value to you? Yeah. What was the first song you heard today? I think I listened to "Kreuzfeuer" by Powerwolf. What was the last video you watched on YouTube? Jonathan Young's cover of "Riot" by 3DG. Someone sign this man, please. Could you design an whole web page yourself? Ha, no. That stuff confuses the shit outta me. Have you ever cooked an entire dinner for your family? No. Who do you tend to get in fights with the most? My mom. Can you say today’s date in a different language? Took me a moment, but in German, yes. Does it bother you if the shower nozzle thing isn’t straight? Yes. Ours won't stay straight for anything. What is the reason you keep waking up every day? Do you have someone or something you particularly live for? Who or what is your inspiration? I want to build a future I'm proud of and enjoy each day more than ever. My history is my inspiration in the sense it's shown me what "low" truly can be and that I can climb out of that hole and to the top of the mountain one day. How would you spend your last night on earth? Would you be by yourself or with friends? Would you do something you never had the courage to do before? I'd want to be with all my loved ones that day, but just with Sara that night. I would tell her how much I love her through all words and actions I possibly could, and if that included something I hadn't had the courage for previously, yes. Do you honestly believe that your relationship (or a future relationship, if you don’t currently have one) will last until the end? How far would you be willing to go for that person? I genuinely think it will, very sincerely. I'd do a hell of a lot for her, but I'm smart enough now to know there has to be a limit. What do you think is the one thing about you that catches everyone’s attention? Are you naturally loud? Or do you make sure you have an eye-catching appearance? I'm very quiet. How would you show someone you loved them, without outright saying, “I love you?” How would you show it through actions? I mean, there's a whole lot you could do. I think the best way is just doing little things that show love. Go make that person their morning coffee, that kinda stuff. What would you do if someone cheated on you? Has that ever happened? Have you cheated on anyone? It's over; no; no. Are you outgoing or shy? I'm shy as hell. Who are you looking forward to seeing? Sara on the 4th. Are you easy to get along with? I think. What kind of people are you attracted to? The unorthodox but friendly ones. The "weirdos," so long it's not in a like, creepy way. People who are very open-minded. Do you still talk to your first crush? No. Do you like bubble baths? I don’t take baths. What are your bad habits? Procrastinating more than anything else, I peel my nails instead of trimming them oops, I weigh myself every single day, I jump to conclusions and catastrophize, I drink soda regularly, I'm very impulsive when incredibly upset, uh... HOW AM I BLANKING HERE ALREADY?????????????????? I have so many. Where would you like to travel? South Africa for the KMP, Tanzania for the Serengeti, Scotland, Japan, Germany, Canada would be cool... man, so many places. Favorite part of your daily routine? Mark video. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? My stomach. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? Idc. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? No, but then again I've been the one broken up with only once. What do you say during awkward silences? Feel like puking and disappearing both. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? No. Ever won a competition? For what? Yeah. 4th/5th grade D.A.R.E. report, some online one for two rare Silent Hill: Revelation pieces, my clogging class when I was in high school won some high rank at a competition, and I believe I've won in one or two other writing things? Been suspended/expelled? For what? No. Been arrested? For what? No. Craving something? What? I have a mad craving for Hardee's chicken tenders, good Lord. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? A stuffed snake from Sara named Plum. :') How many stuffed animals do you think you have? I could not even TRY to guess. I was obsessed with stuffed animals as a kid (I even got teased now and again for occasionally bringing one to elementary school), and so many I have hold deep sentimental value. They're stored in bags in the attic. They're probably gonna end up going to my nieces and nephew, or by if some miraculous change of heart, I want kids. Favorite character from Mean Girls? I couldn't name a single one. Favorite character from Finding Nemo? Dory, always. I was obsessed. OBSESSED. With Dory. I'm not kidding when I say I wanted to change my real name to Dory. Now in adulthood, Gill is high on my list too, probably #2. In a fight with someone? No. Do you tan a lot? Never. Have you ever been on a horse? Yes. I want to legitimately ride one one day, not just at a carnival and such. Are you a vegetarian? I wish, but the juncture I was is over. I had to stop for nutrition's sake as well as easier weight loss. After you truly look into the process of killing the animal... it's nauseating, even with the "humane" methods, which are not exactly so. No, I do not shame meat-eaters; we're omnivores and our diet is designed to include meat. It's just I personally wish I wasn't participating in that process by consuming what has been killed so gruesomely. What goal are you aiming for this year? Improving my mental health further is #1. I at the very least want to make considerable progress on my anxiety. Are you currently reading any books at the moment? Not really. I'm like a few pages into The Fault In Our Stars, but I'm not reading it anywhere near regularly. Would you own a Siamese cat? The cat I have now appears to have Siamese heritage! I love the breed, so obviously yes. Have you ever had an ultimate adrenaline rush? Maybe? Idk. Do you like deviled eggs? I absolutely, positively loathe them. I hate yolk. What’s the farthest you’ve walked? Hm, I dunno. Maybe through Disney World as a kid or a trip to the zoo? What is your favorite horror movie? I like both The Blair Witch Projects. Have you ever seen a rooster? Yeah. When are you likely to hide your emotions? When I'm jealous, probably. Which is scarier: Dying of thirst or of starvation? I mean I don't know how either would feel, but probably thirst? I feel like it would be quicker. When you turn on the TV, what channel do you flip to? I don't watch TV. Have you ever tried to help someone quit smoking? I've told Dad especially and Chelsea I wish they'd quit, usually indirectly to avoid feeling mean or rude. I'm 99% convinced it's gonna be lung cancer that kills my dad, and Chels does it way too much, especially with her age. What was the last comment someone made on your music taste? Mom pointed out how I can jump to heavy metal to some random indie stuff in the blink of an eye. Have you ever had to talk anyone out of suicide? I've tried. One in particular was a very close online friend, but I'm pretty sure she went through with it. Who in your family do you act like the most? Mom, I guess? What was the last topic that you ranted about? RANTS WITH SARA ARE THE FUCKING BEST. Probably her, but idr what. Is there someone that makes you feel like you’re walking on eggshells? Not anymore. Have you ever been in a physical fight on school grounds? No. Have you written anything in a bathroom stall? What, if anything? No. Was there ever a time when you wished you’d never been born? Yup. Who is the most sensitive person that you know? Uh, me. Have you ever had a tooth (or teeth) pulled? No. You can have one famous person’s wardrobe; who do you choose, and why? Suzy Hanson is an i c o n. When was the last time you wrote someone a note? Oh idk. It may have been the end of '17 when I sent Jason that final/closure letter. Do you tell your parents before you go somewhere, or just leave? I tell Mom. What was the last thing you tried to get out of doing? Hm. I dunno. If someone makes fun of you, are you able to laugh it off? NOPE. HI AVPD I SEE YOU. When was the last time that you watched the sun come up? Not since that time my sis, her best friend, and I stayed up all night. We went on like two walks and went swimming; my mother woke up very confused lmao. Have you ever (purposely or accidentally) played with someone’s heart? Not to my recollection. Has anyone ever played with yours? I don't believe he did so deliberately as some game. When was the last time someone told you to turn your music down? During a car ride with my mom at some point. I always control the music and yeah, it's a bit too loud sometimes. Are you one to spend a lot of time in the bathroom? No. How many times a day, on average, do you look at the time? I dunno, frequently? It's not as if I'm ever away from the laptop long, and a clock's right there. Do you like the smell of cinnamon? Omg yes. Do you like frogs? Yeah! Are you afraid of dying? Not really. The older I've gotten the more I've become comfortable with it just being a part of life. I sure don't want death to come prematurely, but I still don't really worry about what's after death. I'm fearful of the process, but not it itself. Do you consider yourself politically intelligent? NO. I'm clueless. Hence why I'm neutral on a lot. Do you like pixie sticks? Ye. Do you like French toast? I would die for the perfect French toast probably. Are you good at doing math in your head? No; I can't do even simple math up there. Do you know a lot about history? Definitely not. Name a TV show that you absolutely can’t stand. Rooster Teeth was the first to come to mind. Do you look like your age? I guess. The past two times I've had alcohol at a restaurant I wasn't carded... though that makes me fear I look even older. x_x Do you feel confident in a bathing suit? Fuck no. Have you ever had a concussion? Once. Sucked major dick. Do you like hot tubs? For a little bit. Do you know anyone who is battling cancer? Not currently, at least I think. Have you ever donated money to a charity? Yeah. Do you like the color lime green? Sure. Do you wish you could change something about your hair? Can I dye it already please????? Have you ever gotten a makeover? No. Do you think the minions from Despicable Me are cute? They annoy the fuck outta me. Did you have a Gameboy as a child? Yes; still have it, actually. Have you ever auditioned for a talent competition? No. Do you like the Silent Hill movies? Seeing this question made me so happy asjfjfweowq. The first is good, though I had some complaints about the altering of the plot. I warmed up to it quite a bit with time, though; I was just biased towards the game, which I still do like more. The second is... objectively trash as a plot, all the hell over the place. I think the entire fandom agrees with that. The only things I really enjoyed about it were of course Red Pyramid/Pyramid Head and the carousel scene with Dark Alessa. Tell me something you’ve been made fun of for in the past. I'm always on some type of technology. I fucking hate it. Do you support war? I'm a pacifist. Guess. Do you send messages on Facebook a lot? Nope; if I do it's only ever to Girt, really. Do you use the word “hello” daily? No. Who’s the biggest hugger you know? Idk. Where did you get your worst scar from? I can't see it, but I'm assuming the one from my surgery. Do you like Coco Pebbles the cereal? I used to find them okay, but haven't had 'em in years. Do you stick your tongue out often in pictures? No. Honestly have you ever purchased something, wore it, and then returned it? Maybe? I don't think so, though... I'd feel too bad. At least me now would. Which one of your family members are you closest to? My mom. If chocolate was an illegal drug - would you be a drug addict? I assume you mean it became illegal just the way is/with no new risks to it? In that case, I wouldn't be an addict or go out of my way to get it, but if there was a piece of chocolate easily available to me, yeah, I'd eat it. Would you rather have name brand shoes or name brand clothes? Shoes, because they're obvs. gonna be of better quality and I care about walking comfortably more that "fancy" clothes. Which is worse: onion breath or garlic breath? Oh idk, both are. Ew. When was the last time you got a shot? When I was at the dentist a few months back and they had to fill a cavity, thus I had numbing shots. They had to give me way more than usual, though, which I thought was odd. I just wasn't getting numb enough until like, 6+ in. Are you proud of your parents? I'm very proud of how Dad has developed as a person, and I have immense respect for my mom for how she works her ASS off to keep her kids safe, healthy, and well-provided for. I could never do all she does. Do you say “soda” or “pop”? "Soda." Are you shy about singing in front of people? YES. Which is better: orange or grape soda? Orange; not a fan of grape soda. Who was the last person in your house who isn’t family? Good question.

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