#also. fun quote from today. 'i got cummed on!'

[strawberrynova]

the wind is my greatest enemy what do you mean swing flag

[sugawhaaa]

Keeho x reader

☆~"Cutie"~☆

☆pairing::dom!keeho x sub!fem!reader

☆warnings::smut

☆genre::shower sex, fingering, oral

A/N:: It's 1am and I'm just starting this 😍

That's a quote from me from like 3 weeks ago when I started this 🤠I've been working on this fanfic for wayyyyyy too long bro 💀

Keeho loves experimenting with your body. He loves to just feel up every inch of your body with his hands, tongue, lips, even a vibrator just to see what makes you cum the most. Though he has found many of your turn ons he's also found a lot of your personal dislikes. Very specific taste he must admit.

But today was a new day and a new moment for Keeho to give you some attention had arrived.

You laid in bed scrolling through your phone while your boyfriend was in the shower. You heard him turn off the water from next door and assumed that he was now drying off, soon coming to see you again. The door to your room opened and there was keeho, shirtless with a towel around his neck and wet hair. You soaked in the sight before he moved to get some clothes on.

He threw on a black hoodie and kept his shorts on. You watched him closely from the corner of your eye when suddenly he approached you. He crawled up on the bed in front of your legs and looked up at you. You gave him a questioning look. "What?" You said as you set your phone down.

"Oh nothing," he hummed with a light smile. You gave him another confused look before he got up and went to his desk. You let him be and decided to play some games on your phone. About 30 minutes passed when he suddenly took off his headphones and turned to you. "Wanna try something?"

You looked at him confused "try what exactly?" He didn't reply but instead stood up and looked as though he was waiting for you to stand up with him. You stood up and he grabbed your hand as he led you to the bathroom.

He stopped in front of you and let go of your hand. You looked at him confused before he pulled off his sweater. "W-what are you doing?" You said as you took a step back. He then approached you. He shut the door before pinning you against it, his left hand on the light switch, the other at your arm. Keeho leaned in and his lips grazed over yours.

"Trying something new~" he replied before he kissed your lips and he slowly dimmed the lights down. Your hands roamed around his tan, toned skin as his lips lapped at yours. Light, muffled groans escaping both of your throats. The lights just bright enough to glow up Keeho's face as you took a moment to breathe and appreciate his beauty.

While you were admiring him he bent down and took of his shorts too. You tried not stare at him too much but your nasty little mind couldn't help it. He then encouraged you to undress too, which you did but when you took off your shirt Keeho came closer to you. He wrapped his arms around your torso and found the clip of your bra.

"Keeho what are you doing?" You said with your hands in the air as you held your shirt.

"Trying to get this stupid bra off of you." He said angrily as he messily unbuckled it.

"Sexy yet still funny," you smiled before he went to go take your shorts off.

"Y-You know I can do this myself, right?" You laughed awkwardly as he did the simplest task for you.

"Yeah but it's more fun like this and I know it turns you on when I do it," he smirked. Damn he really does know his shit about you. You refused to reply and instead you just looked away with pink cheeks. He then stayed squatted down to the floor as you took your legs out of your shorts and undies. Keeho looked up at you with complete lustful admiration, his eyes just begging to break you with pleasure. He then gently grabbed your hips and placed his soft lips on your already soaking clit.

Sparks sent up your body at the simple touch of his tongue against your sensitivity. You bit your lip harshly as he skillfully pleased your core, just waiting for you to cum on his face. You tried to hold your legs open for him to easily access you but you couldn't keep yourself together. Your legs just drawn to each other like magnets as his tongue swirled slowly around your entrance and clit.

He suddenly stopped before getting up, making you frustrated. "Wanna get in the shower now?" He said with a slight seductive tone and a quick smirk. You nodded and with that you both got in the shower. Keeho turned on the water before kissing you with all the tongue he had in him.

Lewd sounds echoed throughout the bathroom as your tongues collided simultaneously. The small space forcing your nude bodies closer to each other. "I want you so bad," you croaked out between heated kisses.

"I'm right here baby," Keeho said in his deep raspy voice as he looked at you with admiration. His face only centimeters from yours. You started mindlessly grinding against his leg in hopes of some relief but the water soaked up most of the pleasure. There was no friction it was like you were just sliding around on his wet leg.

You then started begging for his fingers and he caved in, but he couldn't follow your command without a little teasing. He played with your clit for a while to quote on quote "warm you up to his touch" yet you had already been all up on him for the past 20 minutes at least. His fingers then slid down your folds before satisfyingly entering you fully. His touch had you seeing stars and feeling sparks.

You couldn't help but moan out his name yet you were only on one finger so far. As the trickling of the water stimulated your skin keehos nimble and soaked fingers stimulated your insides. Distorted sounds escaped your throat as you started feeling more and more tense. At this point keeho had two fingers slowly curling in and out of you as your walls hugged them tight.

"Please I'm gonna cum~" you whined out as Keeho started thrusting his fingers faster. Your body jerked everytime he hit that sweet spot with more and more intensity every time. You then finally released. Your head swung back and eyes shut tight as the knot in your stomach poured out into the water of your shower.

Then keeho went down on his knees and started licking you up like his life depended on it. You slapped your palm over your lips to muffle the moans. "K-keeho what are you doing?" You stuttered out as he lathered at your juices.

"Getting all your flavor before it goes down the drain," he explained before getting back to his tongue work. Since you were already so sensitive due to just cumming and the hot water on your skin you felt a knot building in your stomach rather fast. As Keeho gripped onto your thigh harshly you warned him of your condition as your legs started quivering.

"Two times in a row-" Keeho murmured. "Such a good little girl~" he cooed before you cam on his lips. Blush covered your face after cumming for the second time in a row while keeho was just eating you up. Keeho kept praising you over and over as he drank all your load. "So good, you always taste so freaking good," he said as he held your hips like the ring of a bowl. You blushed at his comments and when he was finished eating you out he wasn't done.

"You did so good baby," he said he hugged you tightly. "Now, let's get this hair washed shall we?"

[fbfh]

Nico di Angelo nsfw alphabet

as with all nsfw/smutty/sexy content, all characters are aged up to 18+

words: 3.2k

pairing: nico x (mostly) gn reader (one mention of the word coochie as a joke cause it's pretty hard to talk with dick in your mouth, but it can reference whatever hole you'd like, a few mentions of the phrase going down on someone but that's just slang for oral so it's still gn)

a/n: so I went way overboard with this!!!! It's like 6 paged in google docs and took me a few days to do but it was so fucking fun send in more characters for me to do nsfw alphabets for!!!! kinda wanna do Leo next but when don't I title of your sex tape

also it's not/barely beta read or proof read because I have no brain today :)

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Aftercare king. Like, seriously. Dating him is like dating the anime vampire boy you saw on google images and got a crush on in middle school. Everything he does is riddled with tenderness and yearning and romanticism and lust. He’s still so affectionate, kisses fluttering over your skin like skipping stones, hands massaging and caressing you, that it almost feels like you’re still having sex. That’s how tender and hands on he is. He mutters all these flowery words, switching between english and greek and italian, and everything he’s saying is so pretty that you think he’s quoting someone. Nope. All improv babey. That’s the kind of feelings you invoke in him.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

On himself, he likes his like… mouth and jawline. Sometimes when he smiles he sees his mom and sometimes a little bit of Bianca. Tied for first place is the two little lines on his stomach that your fingers brush where you take off your shirt. Sometimes he traces over where your fingers brush when he remembers your touch. On you?? I know saying everything is kind of a cop out but jesus christ,,,, listen, he really likes the way his hands fit on your hips, especially when your legs are wrapped around him. I’ll leave it at that.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

He used to be really embarrassed when he would cum. He’s such a service… I was gonna say service top but like, he’s just totally there for you - more on that later - so when you make him cum it feels so amazing he used to think he wasn’t being a good lover??? Like if he’s feeling this good he must be being selfish in bed??? Very much not the case and you got that ironed out real quick. Now, especially after all that, it feels like one of the most intimate parts. If he possibly can he’ll try to time it so you cum together, but it doesn’t always happen. No one’s complaining.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He has a vampire fantasy and no I will not be taking constructive criticism on this. The theatrics, the romantic lusty gothic vibes, the glorification of the dichotomy between life and death????? Also between being a kid during world war ii and being a demigod, the whole immortal without being a god thing really appeals to him. It will be a long and difficult process for him to be able to admit this to you, in spite of how much he wants to. When he does, you’re more than happy to indulge him.

It’s like… it’s not even “ooh i’m a sexy angsty vampire i have to bone you before I feed from you to get your blood pumping” [cough cough twilight nsfw cut aka the fic 50 shades of grey was made out of] [also edward cullen is NOT a top so already off to a rough start there] it’s much more of like… “I’m a beautiful sensitive dramatic ass vampire that wants nothing more than to be loved but alas i’m too intimidating… and yet? This beauty isn’t scared off by me? I must prove my devotion to you by going down on you and reciting poetry into your coochie”

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Okay okay. He doesn’t have a lot of practical experience, but he has done copious amounts of research in the form of tender romance novels written mostly by women. He was still a kid when he was in the lotus casino, so by the time he was interested in learning about that stuff, he basically had no family and had pushed away all his friends. Yikes. He did, however, consume tender romance novels aimed at women at light speed. Like, I read all 70 chapters of this slowburn fic in one night energy. And these all have a very romantic take on sex and intimacy, which already appealed to him a lot, so after a little practice, he’s able to hone these theoretical skills into something really amazing. After your first time he was like ‘sorry that was probably pretty bad, it was my first time’, you’re like ????? you literally didn’t believe it was his first time, that’s how loving and amazing he is.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Nico really does love any position where he can hold you close and pepper you with kisses and whisper things into your ear. Also ideal if he can gaze at your beautiful form. His words.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Not strictly goofy or serious, mostly focused on making you feel every good feeling he can. If he makes you giggle a little, that means you’re happy, so he’ll take it. Usually giggling is instigated with outlandish plans for the future, like “let’s run away to a private island” or “we should buy an old castle in italy so I can be your fairytale prince” etc. all with a you deserve the world my love overtone.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

It’s surprisingly hard to find specific historical information on men’s body hair grooming, but I was able to find some information. So, presumably, he keeps things well groomed. I feel like he gets really scared of getting cut or getting those little bumps when he shaves, so he’s very meticulous to make sure he does a good job.

I know this is supposed to be mostly about down there hair, but I feel like the same principle applies for other body hair and like, facial hair. Stubble was pretty out of style in the 30’s and 40’s, so he probably shaves his face every morning. I feel like he tried to grow out a pencil mustache at one point, but you both agreed it didn’t really suit him. Sometimes if he gets busy, he gets a little stubbly, and you think it’s incredibly hot. Another reason he likes keeping his face shaved is because he loves kissing you a whole lot, and doesn’t want to scratch your face. Or other areas.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

He can make every moment feel intimate, just by the way he looks at you alone. During the actual heat of the moment he literally makes you feel like every single corner of your body is filled with love. He has this specific type of adaptable sensuality that somehow makes every single moment perfect. He can do something as simple as hold your face and sigh slightly, and you’re filled with more emotion than you’ve felt from the last several very good movies you’ve watched combined.

No matter what you’re doing, just holding hands or having him absolutely wreck you on the coffee table, you just feel this intense energy pouring over you like a waterfall. He’ll let out these little moaning sighs and sing your praises in the same breath. Romantic intimacy is so ingrained in him it really is woven into everything he does with you. It’s pretty much the basis for the way he expresses love for you.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Usually only if you two are apart for a while and he’s really missing you. If he has to leave on a quest or some other business and he has the feeling it’ll be longer than a day, he’ll take a memento with him, probably like one of your shirts that he sprays with your perfume or cologne or body spray or something. A lot of times when he’s feeling ~lusty~ for you, he’ll write you a love letter first. Sometimes he gets so wrapped up in what he’s saying and feeling that he gets so overcome with lust and missing you he has to do something about it.

If palming himself and finishing the letter doesn’t work, he’ll take a shower to ‘cool down’ but keep making the water incrementally hotter. One thing leads to another and he can’t stop imagining you in that warm steamy shower with him, how you’d kiss his neck and trace your fingers over his abs, and how tightly he’d hold you, and the little breathy sighs you’d make when he kisses you and caresses you in just the right places… of course nothing compares to you, and he’ll definitely bring those fantasies into reality once he’s in your arms again.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Praise, giving and receiving. All he wants is to make you feel as amazing as you intrinsically make him, so when you tell him how good he’s doing???? Oh my god it adds fuel to his already roaring fire. A little praise goes a long way with him, so start off slow or it’ll be too overwhelming. Giving praise comes as easily as breathing to him, and often overlaps with body worship. He does these so naturally he doesn’t even really realize they’re kinks. Like, Hozier levels of adoration and praise and body worship.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

He loves the spontaneity of doing the classic sweep of the arm to clear off a surface to bang on. Coffee tables, kitchen counters, against a wall, anywhere spontaneous that’s usually not for banging on that says “I am so overcome with lust I must express it to you right now and can’t possibly wait to get to the bedroom”.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

He’s very touch starved and love starved, so the simplest acts of affection can make the rube goldberg machine of “wow you’re so amazing and I love you so much and I need a way to express these overwhelming feelings…. How about… making out with you and caressing you tenderly” get going. If you take it a step further and really instigate something by running your hands over his torso, brushing the hair out of his face, or pressing kisses to his neck, he’ll react immediately.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

It’s probably obvious at this point, but love and emotional connections are absolutely critical to him, so I don’t think he could do anything with hard domming, or something where the sexual aspect is more about power and control than expressing love. I also don��t think he’d really be down for some of the stuff that’s considered more extreme, anything that would cause harm, or anything that would hurt you at all. You’re too precious to him for him to let any harm come to you.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

If you give him oral he will not even know what to do with himself. It’s a whole new level of euphoria. He doesn’t even know what to do with himself. You can get out some of the most amazing noises so easily it’s almost a little surprising. He’s total putty in your hands (and mouth). If you’re okay with hair touching he’ll grab your hair or the back of your neck with a gentle, firm grip. He’ll literally be a writhing mess beneath you and it’s really incredible. He will absolutely return the favor, and then some.

He will give you oral practically at the drop of a hat. The skill he has is… unmatched. He’ll massage your hips and thighs gently in a way that somehow feels really relaxing and also amplifies everything he’s doing with his mouth and hands. He’ll moan into you, his tongue finding the perfect spot over and over, genuinely enjoying this as much as you are. Knowing he’s giving you the same type of euphoria that you give him really brings him more and more into the moment. He could literally go down on you for hours and still crave more, so he definitely lets you set the tone for how much. If you just let him go crazy, I’m sorry babes, but you won’t be able to walk for several days.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Moderate to fast paced, incredibly sensual. Even when he’s practically grinding against you at light speed, it will still feel like the most steamy heavy romantic thing ever.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Okay, listen. At first glance, you wouldn’t think he’d like quickies at all, however, he is an any time any place kinda guy. He can make hooking up in a broom closet feel like your fucking honeymoon. He’s fully prepared to sweep you off your feet and make your legs shake at any given moment, then go back to pick up dry cleaning like it’s no big deal.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Absolutely game to experiment, especially if it’ll make you happy. He’ll take some risks, especially if the reward of making you happier and feel better than ever is greater than whatever the risk is, which it usually is. He’ll let you take the lead with experimenting a lot of times, being more than willing to try whatever fantasies or desires you have. All he wants to do is indulge you, which he does frequently.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Tied for most stamina out of the entire demisquad. He could probably go 4 - 6 times in a day, lasting between quickies and over an hour, if you wanted to. Oh my god, I hope you’re ready to be really sore. Like, look forward to it. He never gets tired.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Initially, I don’t think he really has a lot of toys for himself, but if you have any you like, he’ll become very well acquainted with them. Once he breaks that ice a little and sees how fun they can be, you’d better believe he’ll go on a shopping spree or two.

He’ll start surprising you with toys, lingerie, anything that makes him think of you or that you mention you like or want to try. You’ll come home, and see a sleek shopping bag containing a few black boxes and some tissue paper. You start to open it and feel Nico’s arms around your waist, breath fanning across your neck. “I hope you like it, cuore mio…” he’ll murmur, already pressing kisses into your skin. He smiles into the crook of your neck when you gasp, eyes landing on the first of many surprises.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Listen, he doesn’t tease you intentionally, he’s not mean enough for that. Usually he ends up caressing you and rambling about how much he loves you and how good he wants to make you feel at a time when he can’t immediately follow through. Unfortunately, you’ll both just have to suffer with these lovely thoughts swirling around your mind until you can find a time and place to take action. Which, depending on the circumstances, can be much more of a priority than other times.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

When he can be, he’s very loud. Circumstantially, that’s not always the case. When he needs to keep it down, either due to a quickie or other people being nearby. When that’s the case, expect a lot of low, stilted moans, breathy sighs, heavy breaths, and low growly rumbling moans. When he can be louder, he definitely will be. Breathy pants, loud moans and exclamations, rambling praise and curses like strings of christmas lights. If you give him oral, that’s probably when he’ll be the loudest, whining and writhing, yelling ‘oh god, tesoro’ so loudly you end up with a noise complaint or two.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

I think I’ve mentioned this before, but he loves when you take off his shirt. Like, he’ll go feral if you slip your fingertips under the hem of his shirt, tracing your way over his abs and chest while you slowly lift it off. Like, that’s one of the things he looks forward to most when he reunites with you after not seeing you for a while, it’s one of his favorite things you do. If you want to make his brain full of serotonin and make his pupils all lovey and dilated and focused on you, this is exactly the way to do it.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Listen, I personally believe that all demigods have either fucking schmeat or a gorilla grip, so following that logic, Nico’s got a lot going on. He’s big and girthy, with just the right amount of veins. Even when you’re just bumping and grinding, he still makes you feel so full. He can fill up every inch of you, making you feel so complete. You have no complaints.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Very high sex drive. Very very high, astronomically high sex drive. Dating Nico probably means you’ll be among the first of the demisquad to break that ice, somewhat of a shock to all. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: “any time any place” -Nico di Angelo probably. He can and will sweep you off your feet and make you see stars at the drop of a hat. Utterly obsessed and in love with you, and always looking for an opportunity to show that off. You could literally wake up in the middle of the night and start kissing his neck and feeling him up, and he’ll wake up with a moan and this blissful smile, immediately turning to reciprocate. Since your sleep schedule is so fucked up from all that, you end up taking a lot of naps together.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

After his amazing aftercare, he’ll fall asleep somewhat slowly. He’ll usually be tracing his hand over your arm or back, maybe through your hair if you like hair touching, in complete and utter adoration of you. He likes to fall asleep after you do, but sometimes he’ll doze off before. He’s never slept better than he has in your arms. He has a history of astronomically shitty sleep, but when you’re wrapped up in each other’s arms, he suddenly loves to sleep again. If he needs some extra sleep, he’ll nap with his head in your lap or on your stomach. Just having you there makes him feel so at peace. I don’t know if it’s actually possible to smile while you’re asleep, but he comes as close to that as physically possible, all because of how comforting your presence is to him.

[poisoned-peppermint]

Part 4 of incorrect quotes because i feel obligated to make more due to the sheer number of people who liked it

Dream: My dearest beloved fuckos, is a fun, gender-neutral way to begin a speech

George: See also, esteemed bastards

Bad: Gentlefolk, Ferals, and Domesticated cryptids. 

Sapnap: My fellow yees and haws

~~~~~~~

Techno:Hey I know skyrim is revered as a classic but are we just going to ignore the fact that the entire game only had like 3 voice actors

Wilbur:Stop right there criminal cum

Techno:My ancestors are smiling at me, bastard, can you say the same

~~~~~~~

Foolish:When's your bedtime :)

Purpled: Whenever I next collapse in purely up to the gods

~~~~~~

Ranboo:Human skin is a fursuit for skeletons 

Tubbo: i’m going to debone you like a fucking trout

~~~~~~

Bad:You’re enough

Bad: love yourself!!!!!!! or suffer my wrath!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dream:And by wrath I mean love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bad:no I mean wrath!!!!! You reading this, if you don't love yourself I’ll beat you with a stick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~~~~~~~

Bad:I hope everyone is today well! And tomorrow!!!! After that you’re on your own.

~~~~~~

Bad:what am I supposed to do all day while you’re at work

Skeppy:I don’t know, what do you normally do while I’m gone

Bad: wait for you to get back

~~~~~~

Velvet:For my next stunt, I’ll wake up at 5am on the day I can sleep in

Ant:Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.

Velvet:Early to bed and early to rise makes me a massive bitch

~~~~~~

Tubbo: 3:23 AM make a wish

Ranboo: I wish that you would go to sleep

Tuddo: Yeah well I wish I grew an inch taller every day as you get an inch shorter until you’re as flat as as a piece of paper and I’m 11 feet tall

Ranboo: You’re going to die of a mixture of skeletal instability and heart disease.

Tubbo: Yeah but I’ll look good while doing it.

~~~~~~

Bad:Disrespect me again and I’ll determine your bodies resonant frequency and play a jaunty horn solo that boils your miserable organs inside out 

~~~~~~

Quackity: If I were dating you?  Well, heh. Let’s just say horses wouldn't be called horses anymore

Karl: hey what the honk does this mean…..I’m shaking what does this mean!

~~~~~~

Skeppy: Are you ok?

Bad wrapped in a burrito blanket drinking his 6th cup of coffee: Yes, this is exactly what mental stability looks like

~~~~~~

Sam: My hands are cold

Ponk: *holds their hands*

Ponk: better?

Sam: My lips are cold too

~~~~~~

George at dream’s funeral: can I have a moment alone with them?

Sapnap: of course *leaves*

George leaning over dream’s casket: Now listen, I know you’re not dead.

Dream: yeah no shit

~~~~~~

Skeppy, jokingly: I should have Bad kill you for that.

Bad, peering around the corner: Who do I need to kill?

Skeppy: Wh- no, I was just kidding around.

Bad, pulling out a switchblade: No, who’s bothering you

~~~~~~

Bad *watching the news*: Some idiot tried to fight a squid at the aquarium.

Skeppy *covered in ink*: Maybe the squirt was being a dick.

~~~~~~

Peacock: *spreads feathers at Bad*

Skeppy: It’s trying to attract a mate

Bad, extremely confused: *shyly lifts top*

Skeppy: No!

~~~~~~

Sapnap: Karl, do you eat olives? My dad wants to know

Karl: No, I hate olives. Olives are the spawn of satan. I hate olives so much my mom forced me to live in Mount olive for the rest of my childhood as a curse from the olive gods. Do you understand how much olives have ruined my life? I'm so offended that you asked me that have some consideration for people who have been abused by olives please!

Sapnap: K A R L ……….they’re just olives!!?

Karl: JUST OLIVES EXCUSE!

~~~~~~

Tommy: If you’re bored you can simply close your eyes and rotate a cow in your mind. It’s free and the cops can’t stop you

~~~~~~

Wilbur: is there anyone even named sheldon irl?

Tubbo: my class turtle from 6th grade :)

Wilbur: that’s a turtle

Tubbo: When god sings with his creations, will a turtle not be part of the choir?

~~~~~~

Ranboo: No bcuz why do ppl like salad?? What’s so good about it

Tubbo: chew leaf like god intended

Ranboo: No

Tubbo: Abandon god and see what he does next time you lift your hands in prayer

~~~~~~~

Tommy: Guys, there’s a monster under my bed and it’s really ugly.

Wilbur, on the bottom bunk: Honestly, fuck you.

~~~~~~

Quackity: So according to the cease and desist order I got, apparently you can’t ‘legally’ be a lawyer if your license is ‘cut out of a cereal box’.

~~~~~~

Puffy: If you had too, what would you give up food or sex?

Bad: Sex.

Skeppy: Seriously, answer faster.

Bad: I’m sorry honey, when they said sex I wasn’t thinking about sex with you.

Skeppy: It’s like a giant hug.

Puffy: Ant, what about you? What would you give up sex or food?

Ant: Food.

Puffy: Okay, how about sex or dinosaurs?

Ant: ……...Oh my God it’s like the movie Sophie’s Choice.

Gumi: What about you Velvet? What would you give up sex or food?

Velvet: Oh… um… I don’t know, it’s too hard.

Gumi: No, you gotta pick one.

Velvet: Um, food… no, sex… no, food…sex… food. Ugh! I don’t know! I want both! I- I want Antfrost on bread!

~~~~~~~

Tommy, holding a gun: If the conspiracies about life being a simulation are true WHOEVERS CONTROLLING MY SIM I JUST WANNA TALK.

~~~~~~~

Bad: Why are you guys acting like this?

Boomer: Oh, we’re not acting. We really are like this.

~~~~~~

Techno: Dream has only knocked me out three times this week. Our friendship is really developing.

~~~~~~

Tommy: You’re pathetic!

Wilbur: You’re pathetic-er!

Techno: You’re both losers.

~~~~~~

Bad: I wish I could help you, but I shorn’t.

Skeppy: Bad, please!

Bad: What part of shorn’t don’t you understand?

~~~~~~

Tubbo: Why did you leave Wrestlemania on for Michal?

Ranboo: They need to learn how to protect us.

~~~~~~

Antfrost: I regret getting dragged into your heterosexual tomfoolery.

~~~~~~

Bad: Strawberry milk doesn’t taste like strawberry OR milk.

Skeppy: Go the fuck to sleep Bad!

Bad: LANGUAGE!!

~~~~~~

Ranboo: Tubbo, please calm down.

Tubbo: I asked for two large fries!

Tubbo: *dumps fries onto table*

Tubbo: But all they did was give me a MILLION FUCKING LITTLE ONES!

~~~~~~

Bad: That was the worst throw ever. Of all time.

Skeppy: Not my fault. Somebody put a wall in the way.

~~~~~~

Wilbur: When you’ve been on the internet for as long as I have, you develop thick skin.

Tommy: Navy blue isn’t your color.

Wilbur: Navy blue brings out my eyes you prick! *Chases after Tommy*

~~~~~~

Bad: *Pulls a glass a water from out of nowhere*

Puffy: Where did you get that?.

Bad: My pocket.

Puffy: How do you keep a glass of water in your pocket?

Bad: Skills.

~~~~~~

Tubbo: I will come to your house after work and knock on your window at 11 AM. You will not open the curtains, knowing full well what awaits you, but the knocking only grows louder, more demanding. Finally it stops, your ears ringing. You nervously let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. You're safe now. Minutes pass by and you start to relax. And then you hear a knock at the front door. Like before, you stay still and clutch the blankets around you. You try to tell your self that it's just your imagination. Maybe the milk man? But why would he come so late? Everyone else was asleep, save for Naomi who was playing video games down stairs. To your relief, the knocking stops after a few. Minutes and you breath easy once more. Until you hear a knock on your bedroom door. You don't move. It's just your imagination. She isn't here. She can't be here. You tell yourself, shutting your eyes and willing yourself to sleep. The knock comes again, but with horror you realize that it came from the closet inside your room. You know that you have no choice. You get up, climbing out of bed with shaking limbs. You walk to the closest, trembling, and holding back the tears threatening to spill over your porcelain cheeks. You hesitate with your hand over the closet handle. Maybe it's just your imagination? She's not really there. You can go to sleep and laugh it off in the morning. Your naive thoughts are cut off by another, more demanding knock on the closet door, inches from your face. You know what you have to do. You open the closet door, and there she stands. Chuck e cheese, the mouse looms over you in the dim light. It's soulless eyes boor into you. It raises its arms, and you flinch as it begins to floss at lightning speed. Tears spill over your cheeks. This is the last thing you'll ever see.

Ranboo: Wait, Chuck e cheese’s pronouns are she/her? Trans Chuck e cheese? Good for her.

~~~~~~~~

Bad: Would you like something to drink? *They opened the fridge* We have water, milk, juice, spiders, Dr. Pepper-

Quackity: Spiders?

Bad: Spiders it is then.

Quackity: No, that wasn’t-

*But they were already pouring him a brimming glass of spiders…

~~~~~~

Puffy : Make her pussy wet not her eyes.

Velvet : Make his dick hard not his life.

Punz : Break her bed not her heart.

Skeppy : Play with his boobs not his feelings. 

Ant : Get on his dick not his nerves.

Bad : Always salt your pasta while boiling it.

~~~~~~~

Wilbur: Bet you can’t eat 15 crayons!

Tommy: Bet you I can!

Phil: *sips coffee, checks to make sure 911 is still on speed dial, and goes back to reading the paper*

~~~~~~~

Ant: We need a way to lure in new customers?

Ponk: Maybe we could have some fun, interactive events!

Skeppy: Badboyhalo bath water.

Bad: ABSOLUTELY NOT!

~~~~~~~~

Fundy: GET BACK HERE YOU DUMB FUCK!

Wilbur: LET ME RUN FROM THE CONSEQUENCES OF MY ACTIONS!

~~~~~~~~

Bad: Mint is just cold spicy.

Pummel party Squad: …

Gumi: What the actual fuck is wrong with you.

~~~~~~~~

Quackity: Isn’t it amazing how I can feel so bad and still look so good?

~~~~~~~

Tommy: Why does my arm shake and turn bright red when I’m eating dirt?

Phil:

Phil: Why are you eating dirt?

Tommy: Did I ask you if I should eat dirt? No, so answer my question.

~~~~~~~

Tubbo: I wish I could control wasps and bees to sting my enemies.

Quackity: You’re too young to have enemies.

Tubbo: You don’t even know.

~~~~~~~~

Skeppy: Is there a cactus where your heart should be?

Puffy: What’s up your ass this morning!

Bad: *walks in* …Hi!!

Puffy: Hmm… nevermind.

Skeppy: WAIT NO!

~~~~~~~~

Skeppy: Ha! Don’t you know the trappers trap can trap the trapper?

Skeppy: I must be losing it, I’m quoting Bad.

~~~~~~~

Skeppy: Bad, I sense hostility.

Bad: Good, because I hate you

~~~~~~~

Bad: Are you a painting?

Skeppy: What-?

Bad: Because I want to pin you to a wall.

Skeppy: OH GOD I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO SAY YOU WANTED TO HANG ME OR SOMETHING-

~~~~~~

Tommy: You’re giving me a sticker?

Phil: Not just a sticker. That is a sticker of a kitty saying “me-wow!”

Tommy: I’m not a preschooler.

Phil: Fine, I’ll take it back-

Tommy: I earned this, back off!

~~~~~~

Dream, sweating: George, there’s something I need to ask you-

George: Finally! You’re proposing!

Dream: How’d you know?

George: Dream, you’ve dropped the ring five times during dinner.

George: I even picked it up once

~~~~~~~~

*Bad and Skeppy looking at a locked gate into a park*

Bad: Aw. :(

Skeppy: You know what they say.

Bad: Please don’t-

Skeppy: BE GAY DO CRIME! *hops gate*

Bad: Frick-

~~~~~~~~

let me know if ya’ll want more <3

[the-ce-horniest-book-club]

Last Chance Prompt Fest

Today is the day that our Last Chance Prompt Fest starts.

To take part, you don’t need to claim a prompt through us at all, you just find a prompt you like, create what you want to create and then tag us @the-ce-horniest-book-club​ and use the hashtag “CE HBC Last Chance Prompt Fest”. You can also DM your link to us to ensure we see it.

The event starts today, Friday, August 27th and ends next Friday, September 3, 2021.

Once the event has ended, we will answer the ask for the prompts that received creations. We will also have a masterlist for everything created as well.

Who can we create for?

You can create stuff for Steve Rogers, Chris Evans or any of Chris’s 18+ characters.

What can we create?

While the CE HBC is primarily a writing community, these events are to encourage creators of all types. So for this event, you can write, make moodboards, create a playlist, make a video or whatever you are inspired to create based on the prompts under the keep reading.

All of the prompts are listed below the cut and it does not matter how many things are created for each prompt.

Chris Evans Prompts

Could you do one with chris where the reader is eating something delicious and Chris hears them and tries to distract them with smutty things but the reader picks the treat over Chris. (Just had yams that tasted like my grandma used to make years ago, and I’ll pick that over Chris right now lol)

It’s hot AF where I live and we all know Chris doesn’t like the hot temps… so maybe something about trying to beat the heat

How many rounds was that? Four? God, we’re about to break our own record. With Chris? 😍

That’s a lot of sass for someone who ruined my sheets and still hasn’t apologized. With Chris?

Prompt: being friends with Chris and helping and supporting him with ASP too. When the news hit that Biden won your together and after squealing, he just grabs and kisses you.

Chris Evans brushing his heavily pregnant wife’s hair

Chris introducing you to his family for the first time

Readers reaction when Chris has to shave off his beard for a role and doesn’t tell her?

Hey i had an idea. she faked her orgasm because she has trouble cum.  Chris finds out and is angry because she hasn’t said anything and doubts his abilities?  then he brings her to orgasm

Chris playing Christmas songs on the piano while you wrap presents or something where he keeps you company while you’re doing something else

Ari Levinson Prompts

Cowboy Ari Levinson helping you out after he finds you on his ranch

Curtis Everett Prompts

Trying to have quiet sex with Curtis behind a curtain.

Frank Adler Prompts

Frank Adler gets a new neighbor - reader who is just as intelligent as his family and they like each other right away.

Nick Vaughn Prompts

Nick Vaughan keeping you company on the streets of New York

Steve Rogers Prompts

“I’m your Captain and you follow my orders!” “Aye, aye Cap’n!” “I said Captain, not pirate.”

“Hey Steve, what does a deaf gynecologist do?” “I don’t know.” “He reads lips.”

How about a drunk drabble based off of Right Girl Wrong Time by Jon Langston with Steve and Peggy

someone should write a steve and bucky threesome with a reader

“Yeah sex is great but have you just ever wanted to rub yourself over that fucking beard of Steve’s?”

I have a prompt for you. Steve has fallen in love with the Motown sound since Sam has played most of the genre for him. He has gone shopping, or gone for coffee and he hears you sing a song from the Supremes and is instantly intrigued. Have fun seducing him with music. https://youtu.be/HXGz8i0I2L0

It’s the first Christmas Steve has spent with y/n

Reader making Steve a heart cake for Valentine’s Day ❤️

Multiple Options Prompts

Can I get the following prompt with Steve, Colin, or Jensen? “In ancient Greece, throwing an apple was done to declare one’s love.” “How do I love thee, let me count the ways? Thump, thump, thump.” “So the mild concussion means you love me?”

Could I get “I see that you have your legal name listed as Y/n’s Daddy. That’s incorrect. You’re legal name is what’s on your Drivers Licence.” With any of Chris’ characters please?

SFW Prompts

For Chris or one of his characters, there is only one bed and they got to sleep far apart but wake up cuddling. Bonus points if they don’t hate it.

“Just tell why you did it!” “Because I’m in love with you, okay?!”

How about they’re roommates and “just friends” who develop feelings for each other

“You always say that, but I’d only see you for a day or two until you have to fly out again.”

“You don’t have to say anything, if you don’t want. I just thought you should know.”

i have been in love with you, dumbass

“If you don’t hug me right now I think I might fall apart.”

I have these… powers raging around inside me, and I have no clue how to control them.

“Hey, it’s cold. Light a fire or something. I swear, you’re a cold blooded reptile.”

that guy in the gorilla costume has been following us for the past ten blocks.

going to a masquerade ball

“So, you’re the unfortunate soul stuck with me.”

“I look at you and I think, ‘sunshine. Literal sunshine.’ It’s annoying.”

“Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!”

“What’s with the box?”

“I’m not jealous.”

“It’s not like I love you or anything.”

Merlin quote prompt: Nobility is defined by what you do, not by who you are

“Why do you keep pushing me away? I know you love me.”

“I want to go home.” “And I want to go to the moon. It ain’t happening sweetheart. Time to accept that.”

“I just want you to know I love you and I hope these roses prove that to you.”

Prompt: “if you steal all the blankets I’m going to put my cold feet on you.”

“What have we here? Bed: unslept in. Hair in… missionary disarray. And yesterday’s dress with today’s shame all over it.” Gossip Girl

Every time I’m in the same room with her, I can’t decide if I want to pick a fight with her or push her up against a wall and kiss the fuck out of her. - Falling for My Enemy by Claire Kingsley

“The worst thing is, that even after all of that, I’m still in love with you.”

NSFW Prompts

“Wet pussy is the best. I can’t get enough of the juices dripping from my mouth.”

“She beauty, she grace, I want her pussy on my face.”

“Sheathing my cock inside you feels like a jam donut being torn in half. Delicious and mind blowing.”

Twist on quarantine haircuts: couple helping each other with pubic hair maintenance

“I don’t know if you’re looking for Aztek gold down there, but if you don’t hurry up and fuck my brains out I’ll do it my damn self!”

“Have you ever noticed how eating a hot dog is similar to giving deepthroat?” “No but thanks, I don’t want to eat this now.”

Babe I can’t sleep. I know you just woke me up. Wanna fuck? I’m awake!!!

“I don’t know who you think you’re talking to but I’m about to punish that sassy mouth!”

“I love your longish hair baby. Finally got something to pull while you’re between my legs devouring me.”

Holiday Prompts

“Great, now I have to re-hide your Christmas gifts.”

“I’m not going to kiss you under the mistletoe.”

“The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.”

“What are you doing?” “Hiding from carolers.”

“Santa’s handwriting looks suspiciously like yours.”

“Why does the house smell like a cinnamon roll threw up?”

“Are you Santa? Because I’d sit on your lap.”

“YES I BOOBY TRAPPED THE PRESENTS BECAUSE YOU DO THIS EVERY FUCKING YEAR”

“What the hell kind of Charlie Brown Christmas tree did you buy?”

“It looks like the North Pole threw up.”

i may or may not have gotten tangled up in the tinsel.

“If we don’t have this damn tree up before the end of the night, I’m going to kill you.”

“I’m going to tell Santa to give you coal.”

“It’s an advent calendar. You’re supposed to open one square a day, not eat half the chocolate in a sitting.”

“Why is there mistletoe in every room of the apartment?”

I got a little too drunk off of egg nog and vodka and you look so pretty in this light, and I most definitely want to kiss you right now, best friends or not.

we were going to a Christmas party but fuck if you don’t just look sinful in red, and you know what? Fuck that Christmas party.

Dad!chris (or one of his characters) and his kids at Christmas

“You’ve never had a New Year’s kiss?”

Spending your first Valentine’s Day together with any character

[smol-and-grumpy]

Teacher Of The Year - P.07

Pairing: Professor Dean Winchester x Reader

Summary: Heartbroken and restless, she walked into a bar with the full intention of getting smashed but she got more than she bargained for. Much more.

Warnings: Implied smut, teasing, NSFW

WC: 2640

SERIES MASTERLIST

“Uh.. Miss?” Dean says, eyeing her up and down, as he pretends to have forgotten her name. He also tries to hide the smirk that’s growing almost evidently on his face because he has just caught her off guard and the sound of his voice makes her jerk her face up to look at him. 

He wonders what she’s thinking about, if she was thinking about something naughty because her cheeks burn up and she looks a little flustered, “Please pay attention.” And then he plays his part, frowns at her, for good measure.

“Yes, sir.” Y/N nods her head, lips curve into a grin and the way she said sir has him all hot and bothered. She knows exactly what she’s doing to him and he thinks that maybe, she’s not so innocent after all.

  She holds his gaze while she slowly spreads her legs, feels bold and daring as she leaves them open, flashing her blood red lace panties before crossing them again. Dean’s jaw drops and his cheeks are a little pink. He clears his throat.

Later in the lecture, when her classmates are engrossed in their books, her phone starts to vibrate and when she looks up to Dean, he grins wide and wriggles with his eyebrows. 

She tries not to roll her eyes before taking her phone to thumb over her text messages.

D: Nice panties.

Y/N: Thanks. But why are you texting me when I, and I quote, ‘need to pay attention’?

D: Well, you started it. How am I supposed to teach when you constantly flash me your panties? Which btw, are fucking sexy, I must admit.

She does her best to swallow down the chuckle that wants to slip out.

Y/N: Too bad you can’t see them up close today.

D: Why’s that?

Y/N: I’ve got lectures the whole day plus a study group until late evening. I forgot about that last night, sorry.

D: As long as you don’t turn me on any more than you already are, we should be good. But I think I need to see you tomorrow and talk about your essay.

She looks up at him, sees him wiggling his eyebrows again and she almost chokes up laughing.

“Miss? Is everything ok?” He frowns at her then.

“Yeah, sorry, sir. Everything’s fine.”

 *

 D: Where are you now?

Another text from Dean as she sits in her last class for the day. He probably finished already

Y/N: In class.

It was short because she really should be focusing on what the teacher is saying.

D: Still wearing your panties?

She can’t help but grin at that text because he must be riled up. She’s sent him pictures between classes. Pictures she took while she went to the bathroom, pictures of her panties and her hand inside of them, rubbing at herself.

Well, there goes her focus, thrown out the window faster than lightning because now, she thinks that maybe it’s time to tease him some more, and lowers herself down in her chair. When the professor had his back on her, and the other students were all minding their own business. She spreads her legs and slips the phone in between, one hand parts her panties to the side, and her fingers quickly snap a picture before she sits back upright. 

It was a good one too. She could literally see how wet she is. And all because she can’t stop thinking of him.

She sends Dean the picture with a caption.

Y/N: Yes and they’re all wet because I’m soaked. Think I need to take them off soon.

Sitting back, she waits for his answer and she honestly doesn’t know if she has broken him because it’s taking him way too long. 

Just when she’s about to put her phone to the side it starts to vibrate and her classmate looks at her funny. She shrugs with a grin as she takes the phone and thumbs open her messages. It’s a picture message. From Dean. She opens it and oh god, she wishes she didn’t.

There’s a caption to the picture, too.

D: See what you’re doing to me?

On the picture, there’s Dean, well, only his middle part but she can clearly see it’s him, recognizes that freckled stomach when she sees it, could easily pick him out of a police lineup if she has to. He’s at home because he’s sitting on the sofa, and apparently only in his underwear. His cock is hard, she can see his dick print clearly. She pinches at the picture, zooming in to see the tip of his dick poking through the elastic of his underwear, a shimmer of pre-cum glistening in the light.

It’s honest to god a mouth watering sight. Her heart rate picks up and her cheeks begin to warm up. 

Gnawing at her bottom lip, she decides on her next steps. It looks damn inviting and she would give a lot to be able to taste him right now, can’t lie about that. Calculating the time in her head, she comes to the realization that she simply does not have enough time to go see him.

And while she knows that seeing him today is not possible, she types out a message.

Y/N: You’re a tease

D: Takes one to know one.

He’s probably right. She started it and she really shouldn’t bite off more than she can chew.

Tucking her phone away, she tries to listen to the last couple of minutes of her class and when the lecture finally ends, she gets another message.

D: I’m trying to grade papers but I can’t concentrate.

Y/N: Aww.. poor you. Maybe you should jerk off?

D: Or you could help me.

Y/N: Listen, I have to rush over to the library. Really Dean, you need to get it out of your system. I will probably fuck myself on my fingers later too.

D: Well, now I can not stop thinking about you fucking yourself on your fingers. Thank you very much!

She laughs while still staring on the screen because she can literally see him rolling his eyes at her.

 *

 Her fellow students are already waiting in the library when she arrives. She’s running late because of Dean’s distraction, and she tried to get herself off in the bathroom but it didn’t work so instead of chasing after a relief, she had to run across campus to reach the library on time. Her study group is not exactly thrilled about it and she understands. 

As soon as she sits down, the discussion starts immediately, Y/N didn’t even have time to take out her notes when they bombard her with the first question. It isn’t long though, until they let her off the hook and when the attention isn't on her anymore, she finds herself lost in her thoughts. Her mind wanders around, even if she didn’t want it to but there’s a tingly feeling between her thighs that she couldn’t satisfy yet and oh god, she wants to come so much, wants to get it out of her fucking system like she told Dean to do.

She wonders if she’ll survive until the end of her study group session, thinks that having to sit here is pure fucking torture. Nonetheless, she lowers her head in an attempt to read the last paragraph for the sixth time already and she does not think that she’ll get it in her head this time either. 

“Y/N? Your phone just went off.” Her friend takes a peak at the phone that sits next to her spiral notebook. “Who’s D?”

She jerks her head up, grabs her phone in a hurry. She hasn’t even noticed that her phone went off again and again because she was trying to get that paragraph into her head while she simultaneously tries not to think about his dick in her pussy.

“Oh, someone from tinder.” She says, because the best dick she ever had doesn’t sound like it was a good answer, and takes a look at the three text messages. The first one was sent  twenty minutes ago. 

D: How’s studying going?

D: Hey? You still alive?

D: Hello?

All of them are from Dean.

Y/N: Yeah, sorry, didn’t hear my phone and now my friend is asking who D. is.

D: Tell her it’s the best D you ever had.

Oh my god. She rolls her eyes.

Y/N: Even if it’s true. I’m not going to tell her that.

D: It’s true though, isn’t it?

Y/N: Shut up and let me study

D: Bossy. I like it. 

Y/N: Can you hear that sound? That’s me rolling my eyes.

D: Bratty, I like that too.

Y/N: Fuck you.

D: I’d rather fuck you.

She blushes ridiculously hard at that.

After a long while of not getting one single paragraph into her head, she excuses herself. “I uh..I need to use the bathroom.” She doesn’t wait for an answer, stands up and disappears with her phone. Maybe it would already help if she can splash some water on her face. Maybe that’ll wake her up, making her think of something else than Dean and his ridiculously big and juicy cock. Oh my god. She shakes her head, breathes in and out, needs to hold on for another hour and then she’ll be free to go. 

While she stands all alone in the library bathroom, she splashes water on her face in an attempt to cool it down, and it doesn't do much for the blush in her cheeks as she can see in her own reflection in the mirror. 

Sneaking into a stall, she locks it behind her and leans her back against the wall. She can’t help but brush her fingers against her clit, touches herself through the damp fabric of her underwear and she can’t lie, it feels so good to finally be able to take off the edge a little. Hooking her fingers into her panties, she slides them down and steps out, pushes them into the pocket of her skirt. Whoever invented skirts with pockets deserve a Nobel. 

She then proceeds to rest one foot on the toilet seat and leans back a little more, giving herself more access to her throbbing clit. She starts to rub her folds, to massage her clit, smearing wetness around her pussy and all the while, she thinks of him. Her hands and fingers mimicking his motions from when they touched her last.

There’s a sudden flash of idea and she grins to herself mischievously. Y/N takes her phone out of the pocket of her skirt and snaps a picture of her touching herself, two of her fingers buried in her pussy. She then takes them out and places the slick fingers to her mouth, snapping another picture of her mouth sucking at them.

Y/N: Too late, I’m fucking myself.

She sends the text first and then the pictures.

Y/N: I’m so nice and wet, too.

She never really know how much fun teasing could be but here she is, teasing the fuck out of her professor. And she grins when she pictures him opening up her messages.

D: That’s it. I’m coming

Y/N: Wait, what? You touching yourself too?

D: No, I’m coming to the library.

She gasps silently.

Y/N: I’m not finished yet.

D: Spoiler alert. I’m already waiting outside in my car.

Y/N: You’re what?

D: Thought I could pick you up and honestly, grading papers is not going too well. I’ll do that later.

Y/N: God, what are you doing to me?

D: Look who’s talking.

Y/N: I’m going back to studying.

She pushes her phone back in her pocket before getting out of the cubicle and cleaning her hands of the excess slick, takes a last look to see that everything’s in order in the mirror before she slips out of the bathroom.

While she walks back to her group, she looks around the library but she can’t spot Dean anywhere, which means that he probably stays in his car and really waits for her. What a creep. A cute creep, though.

Back at studying with her group, her phone vibrates again and she takes it out of her pocket.

D: If you have time, come to the Paleontology section. Way in the back.

He wants her to do what? She bites down on her bottom lip, debating on what to do. She sighs out loud before answering him.

Y/N: I’ll see what I can do.

When everyone else is engrossed in their books, she stands up, excusing herself, “Sorry, I don’t feel too well. I need some fresh air and probably will go grab something to eat. I’ll be right back.” She leaves before the others can even object.

Y/N walks to the back of the too dim library and the further back she gets, the darker it gets too. The atmosphere is somehow like in those horror movies, like right before the dumb bimbo gets slaughtered by a psychopath.

Nonetheless she keeps on walking. Rounding up the last corner, she sees him then, sitting at a table on his own, his nose buried in a book.

“Why are you here?” She hisses in a low voice, as she walks closer to him. 

Dean looks up from the book, his gaze travels around, taking in his surroundings before he looks up at her and licks his lips, “Why, I’m just sitting here, reading about Paleontology. Did you know that Dinosaurs translates to ‘terrible reptile’? No? Me neither.”

She purses her lips into a smile, he’s so cute in a nerdy way when he throws facts at her. Dean pushes himself back and away from the table, the screeching of the chair loud enough to make them both flinch and there’s an echo going throughout the library.

“Shhhh!” She places a finger to her lips and Dean tries not to laugh too loud.

“Come here,” He whispers, reaching out for her and pulls her down onto him, letting her straddle one of his thighs.

“Your pants!” She hisses out and he frowns.

“My pants? What’s wrong with my pants?”

“I’m not wearing any panties.”

Dean places his hand on the back of her neck, pulls her closer and kisses her, “Do I look like I care?”

He brushes his fingers along her face, fingertips caressing her cheeks, tucking her hair behind her ears and she can feel the blood rushing to her face.

“You’re going to be the death of me, have I told you that before? If yes, I want you to hear it again,” He’s babbling in a low whispering voice, and she’s squirming in his lap, because she doesn’t want to hear anything in this moment, more than anything, she wants to feel him.

So, she goes in, crushes her lips to his to silence him, preventing him from saying more. Her tongue licks at his bottom lip and he parts for her so easily, giving her enough space to slide her tongue in along his, and her hands were everywhere, tugging and stroking along his body, gripping at his shoulders, ruffling up his hair.

He holds her in place with one hand firmly placed at the back of her neck while the other one disappears underneath her skirt, fingers skimming up her thighs and up around to caress her ass.

“I don’t have much time,” Y/N breathes into the kiss and Dean ignores it, pulls her closer, teeth nibbling at her bottom lip. 

After a while he breaks the kiss, needing air and rests his forehead on hers before he grins, “We should make it count.”

P.08

[michaels-blackhat]

bro-back mountain.

So, it’s still my birthday and I’m still being self-indulgent, so here have another remix. This time it’s @insidious-intent‘s frat boy!michael ‘verse.

-

“Bro. Dude. Seriously, I’m begging you man.”

Alex wasn’t sure why the SigEp boys didn’t seem to know his name. They always called him ‘bro’ and ‘dude’. Maybe, if Jacobson ever called him ‘Alex’ he’d be more inclined to listen to him. As it was, he was grumpy and waiting in line for his coffee at the stand in the engineering building an hour and a half before his first class and definitely not in the mood to be bro’d by anyone.

“Maybe if you actually used my name I would consider listening to you,” he replied as he took his very large iced coffee from the student worker.

“Alex,” Jacobson said, reaching from his caramel blended monstrocity. Alex glared at the glorified milkshake. “Alex you know how he gets when he doesn’t see you for a few days.”

“Yes. I know.” Alex took a sip of his iced coffee. “It’s the only reason I’m on the wrong side of campus at 8 a.m. instead of still in bed.”

Michael had given him a manic smile when he spotted him outside the building. Alex could still feel the sharp press of the brick in his back where Michael had pressed him against the building and kissed him, sloppy and uncoordinated, but enthusiastic.

“I’m not too sure he’s slept? Like at all. And he keeps stress baking, like all the time.”

“That’s not new. He has his interview for that internship after class today, of course he’s stress baking.”

“There’s been like, twenty cakes and I’m pretty sure he hasn’t actually made an edible one yet.”

Alex paused, straw still in his mouth. He knew he was blocking the doorway, but he didn’t particularly care.

“Everything he makes is good.”

“He forgot the flour bro. Twice.”

“Fuck,” Alex swore as he lead the way out of the building toward the green.

“It’s getting so bad that I think Max has only consumed red bull in the last week and Michael just asked if he tried mixing it with espresso.” Both Jacobson and Alex scrunched their noses up at that. “Yes. It was disgusting. And he snapped at the pledges. He made them cry. Pretty sure he was about to throw a punch too, but that was at Valenti, so who knows if that was related. Whatever. Please dude. You’re our only hope.”

Alex sipped his iced coffee again. “I’m your only hope to what? Take my boyfriend to a cabin so that he doesn’t continue to destroy your already disgusting house?”

Jacobson took a loud slurp of his coffee milkshake thing and nodded. “Just a weekend alone with his boyfriend, doing things he loves. You know, snowboarding and fucking you.”

Alex glared at that. It was true, but he didn’t have to say it.

“You know that he’s not the only one who’s busy, right? Yeah, he’s stressed, but I haven’t been around because I have performances. Fuck, I have an exam Tuesday and a new program due on Wednesday. I can’t just spend the weekend away because my boyfriend is grumpy, sleep-deprived, and barely able to feed himself, let alone the rest of you.”

“You can bring your shit! Come on man! You’ll have privacy! The only one’s there will be the two of you. You get out of your dorm and you don’t have to come to the house.” Alex stopped again. Jacobson knew he was winning. “You’ll have your own bathroom for a weekend Alex. The only person you have to share with is Michael.”

Alex stared at Jacobson. Jacobson smiled.

-

“I swear to fucking god Guerin, if I find one piece of hair left in the drain trap you are kicked out of the cabin. I don’t care if you have to sleep in your truck all weekend,” Alex said as Michael pulled the truck in front of the cabin. It was exactly what Alex imagined when Jacobson said ‘dude, Erik has a cabin you can use’. There was a covered porch, one story, a chimney, and presumably a clean bathroom with a door that actually locked.

“Are you seriously more excited to not have a communal bathroom than you are to spend a weekend with me alone?” Michael put the truck into park and cut the engine. “Like, I know the dorms are bad, but it really seems like you’re more into the shower than me right now.”

Alex gave him a look before he got out of the car and walked around to the driver’s side. He opened up the door and blocked Michael’s exit. He leaned in and gave him a kiss, tongue pressing into Michael’s lips and quickly back, a quick tease. He pulled back with a smirk.

“Can’t I be excited about both?” He moved in for another kiss, this one long and languid. He could feel the moment that Michael thought ‘screw it’ and moved to wrap his arms around Alex to just pull him back into the cab to makeout in the front seat, but Alex pulled back before he could. “Might be a little more excited for the bathroom.”

Alex laughed at Michael’s outraged cry and ran towards the porch. He barely got the key in the door when Michael’s arms wrapped around him and he was hauled over Michael’s shoulder. Michael carried him into the cabin and placed him flat on his back on the couch. Michael climbed on top of him with a smile.

“You sure I can’t make you more excited?” Michael’s right arm supported him above Alex, while his left hand wandered from Alex’s neck to his chest. He rubbed at Alex’s chest as he brought his face closer to Alex’s, as he rubbed their noses together and angled his head so that his lips just brushed Alex’s. His lips brushed Alex’s as he said, “I think I can convince you.”

Alex barely let him get the sentence out before he moved his head to kiss Michael properly. His hands that were laying uselessly at his side moved towards Michael’s ass, gripping tight as Michael nipped at his bottom lip. Michael groaned into Alex’s mouth.

They didn’t leave the couch for a while.

-

They’re on the mountain for maybe an hour when it happens.

“Come on bro, let’s try another slope.”

Michael didn’t realize what he said, not at first. He was too busy checking the map for a new trail. Alex had frozen the moment ‘bro’ had left Michael’s mouth. It took a moment, but Michael’s words caught up to him.

“Fuck.”

“What did you just call me Guerin?”

“Alex, babe, I’m so sorry it just slipped out!”

“Your hand is on my ass and we were just making out, yet somehow the ‘bro’ just slipped out? You do that with all your bros?”

Michael hand, which had moved from Alex’s ass to a more appropriate for public location around his waist, tightened where it gripped on his side.

“Oh my god,” Alex gasped, fully aware of the stereotype he was portraying but completely uncaring. This was too big to care about his image as a stoic, emo bitch. “Who?”

“I mean, not since we started dating, so it’s been a long time and--”

“Who, Michael? I need to know!” Michael refused to turn his head to look at Alex. “Come on, tell me. I’m your boyfriend, you can tell me anything.”

“If I tell you, you’ll just go text Maria and Isobel, and I don’t want them to know.”

“I promise, I won’t! Who could it be that you don’t want Isobel to- Wait? Was it MAx?”

“Oh gross no. He’s basically my brother.” Alex opened his mouth but Michael beat him to his comment. “Basically my real brother, not like in the frat scene.”

“Ugh,” Alex groaned and leaned his head on Michael’s shoulder. He looked up at him through his lashes and asked again. “Tell me, please? It wasn’t Valenti was it?” Michael finally looked at him at that, disgust clear on his face. “Hey, I just needed to be sure, don’t look at me like that.”

“Fine. It was Jacobson.”

Alex pulled his head back so that Michael could see his disbelieving stare.

“Jacobson? You mean the man who begged me to take you away for the weekend so that you could quote “do your favorite things”, one of which is me?”

“Well, yeah,” Michael said, tone saying that it was obvious. “How do you think he knows you’re one of my favorite things?”

“Pretty sure he was just making a lewd sex joke and he wasn’t serious.”

“Oh, he was totally making a sex joke. It’s also true. After that first party you went to I basically stopped messing around with anyone else.”

“But we didn’t start dating until weeks later?” Alex asked, voice soft in the mountain air.

“I know,” Michael said, voice just as soft and he used the arm around Alex to pull him in closer. “But I already knew I liked you, had since that class we shared, and I thought that maybe, you giving me even one chance, could mean something good for us in the future. Wasn’t going to mess that up for some hook up.”

He finished his sentence by rubbing his nose against Alex’s. Alex gave him a quick peck on the nose, his lips almost burning hot compared to the cold skin of Michael’s nose.

“I think you just made up for accidentally calling me bro,” Alex said with a smile. He kissed Michael’s cold cheek. “You’re cold,” he continued with a smirk, “why don’t we go back to the cabin and warm ourselves up?”

-

“We should probably wash the sheet,” Michael said from the mess they had made of the bed.

“There’s a lot we should probably clean,” Alex said from the bathroom. “I really don’t know how you managed it, but there’s definitely dried cum on the tile in here.”

“Think they have a cleaning person who will take care of this?”

Alex popped his head out of the bathroom. “I know I make fun of your cleanliness levels constantly, but you are aware of how gross it is to make other people clean your body fluids, right? Like, we are more than capable of wiping down a few walls and doing laundry.”

Michael poked his head out of the blankets. “We do clean the house, you know that right? I know you’ve been there when we’ve cleaned it.”

“I don’t think picking up after a house party really counts.”

“Fine. We’ll clean.” He groaned as he rolled out of the bed. His feet didn’t quite make it under him and he fell to the floor. “Hey,” he said as he popped up from where he fell. “I thought you wanted to study a bit before we left. Are you going to have time to do both?”

“Of course,” Alex smiled as he made his way to the bed. He gave Michael a quick kiss before he started pulling the sheets off and rolling them up. “I’ll start the laundry and study while you clean the bathroom.”

“This was your plan all along, wasn’t it.”

“Love you babe,” Alex called as he walked out the bedroom door. “There’s bleach spray and a cleaning rag in the bathroom.”

-

It was Monday morning and Alex was once again waiting in line at the coffee cart in the engineering building. Michael was a sleepy presence at his back, face smashed into Alex’s neck and his arms wrapped around him Alex. He was doing a convincing job of imitating an octopus, or really anything overly clingy.

“Michael let go, our coffee’s ready.” Alex moved towards the worker who had his iced coffee and Michael’s mocha.

“No,” Michael mumbled into Alex’s neck. “Don’t want to let you go.”

“You’ll see me in four hours once my exam is over.”

“No.”

“Michael, seriously I just spent all weekend with you, we’ll survive a few hours.”

“But that still doesn’t make up for the week before,” he grumbled, but he did loosen his arms so that Alex could untangle himself to get their coffees.

“We were busy last week,” Alex admitted when he came back with his iced coffee. He handed Michael his mocha. “And the only thing we have this week is that project I have due for my programming class. It won’t be like the last few weeks.”

“I really liked this last weekend,” Michael admitted.

Alex smiled. “I liked it too.”

“We could do it more often.”

“I don’t think Erik would be cool if we stole his parent’s cabin every weekend,” Alex said with a laugh.

“I kind meant more like, I liked waking up with you every morning, cooking you breakfast, falling asleep with you.”

“I liked that too.”

“What if we did it every day.”

“Michael, are you asking me to move in with you?”

“Yes, but before you say anything I don’t mean at the house. I meant more like, what if we got our own apartment? Then we’d never go days without seeing each other, because even if we’re busy we’ll always be going home to each other. And you’d be able to play your music whenever because it’ll only be me and you know how much I love it, and I’d get to-”

“Ok,” Alex cut him off before he could work himself up more. “Ok. Let’s start looking for places for next semester.”

“Really?” Michael’s smile was huge.

“Really.” Alex kissed his cheek. “Now go, you only have three minutes until class.”

“Oh Shit!” He gave Alex one last kiss. “Bye,” he said into the kiss. “Love you.”

“Love you too.”

Five minutes later Alex got a message with an apartment listing.

Pay attention to class he typed back to Michael. He smiled and made his way towards his dorm. He still had another hour before his exam.

[ddaengyoonmin]

BTS Friends to Lovers Series (Taehyung)

Pairing: Police officer!Taehyung x Badgirl/Stoner!reader

Genre: Angst, Smut, Fluff, small attempts for humor

Warnings: some slightly dark themes, drug dealer!Jungkook, swearing, lots of weed references, deep throating, cum swallowing, dom!Tae, face slapping with hands and with his cock (cleanse my souuul oops) assault on a cop, some abuse of power from a Pervy older cop. Getting arrested. (I think that’s all let me know if I missed any)

A/N: while this is a reader insert I put a lot of my own personal experience and life into this piece. It was also partially based on a dream I had about getting arrested by taehyung

Word count: 6k

Songs to listen to: ‘Free spirit’ - Manila Grey ‘Parking lot’ - Manila Grey ‘Play with Fire’ - Sam Tinnesz

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to tell my mom and dad about this. You know they’ll just go right to your parents about it.  As long as it’s the last time this happens... right?”  Taehyung turned around and cocked an eyebrow at you from the driver’s seat.

You let out a groan and rolled your eyes.  “Sure Tae, of course it’s the last time” you spoke with a hint of sarcasm in your voice.  

“I mean it y/n, you’re lucky it was me that got to you and not one of the other guys.  You’d be down at the station right now instead of sitting in my car with a milkshake” He scolded

You took a big sip on the straw of your milkshake “Yeah thanks for this by the way, I was really getting the munchies” You joked

Taehyung let out a loud sigh, taking off his police issued hat and running his fingers through his shaggy brown hair annoyed.  Then holding up the plastic bag that had the remaining weed that you hadn’t smoked yet in it.  “I’m keeping this you know that right?”

You shrugged “What for? are you gonna start smoking again Mr. Do-good?” you teased him. 

“y/n…” he spoke sternly. “Damnit, you’re so lucky we are friends.  I don’t think you realize how many times I’ve saved your ass from doing actual time over this stuff” 

“It should be legal anyways and you know it.  Besides...I knew a time when you would’ve been right there with me” you said matter of factly. 

“Well that was a long time ago y/n.  We were kids, now we are adults.  Well...I am at least” he shot you a joking glare and you pretended you didn’t see him and just took another long sip on your milkshake. 

“I’m taking you home now” he sighed and drove out of the parking lot the two of you had been sitting in. 

You had known Taehyung since the two of you were practically babies, he was a year older than you but the two of you had been best friends since as long as you can remember. 

Your mom and his mom were best friends at college and were each other's maid of honor for their weddings.  Your families were tied together like an unbreakable knot, dinners together at least twice a month and unscheduled random hangouts were just part of your life, and with it, Taehyung. 

You were there when he had his first kiss at the middle school dance, you comforted him after his first break-up with said girl that he had his first kiss with.  You both drank your first beer together, and smoked your first joint together.  Everything that you did, you had done with Taehyung.  Until he graduated highschool a few years ago, and had the grand idea that he wanted to become a police officer.  That decision put quite a damper on the shenanigans you were used to getting into with him, and you’d felt yourself grow slightly more distant from him as a result. 

But, he still looked out for you.  Times like today you were kind of grateful he had joined the police force, because he was right, if anyone else had caught you smoking a joint with a few extra grams to spare on you, sitting inside a big yellow slide on a playground thinking that no one would notice (Spoiler, they did…) They wouldn’t have just scolded you and then bought you a strawberry milkshake. 

 Taehyung pulled up to your house and walked around to open the back door of the police cruiser for you.  

“Stay out of trouble y/n.  There's only so many get out of jail free cards I can offer before someone notices you know.” he pulls you into a quick hug

You snuggle your head into his chest for the quick moment, that he hugged you. 

“Ah, Don’t make me smell” he quickly grabs your shoulders putting you arm's length from him with his nose scrunched, a disgusted look on his face. 

“Don’t act like you don’t miss that smell” you winked at him as you walked the cement path leading to your front door.  

Taehyung rolls his dark eyes and gives you a quick smile.  

He didn’t always used to be like he was now, he was the biggest stoner you knew.  Which is what always caught you off guard about his decision.  It seemed quite random, it was strange enough to you that you felt it could’ve made the news, ‘Small town Stoner Turns Good Boy Cop’  You chuckled at that thought.  

Though you missed your favorite smoke buddy. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next day when you got out of work you drove over to your dealer’s house to replace the Eighth that Taehyung had to confiscate from you. 

Your old beat up car had been running on its last leg for a while now, but it continued to get you where you needed to go, and you spent too much money on smoke to think about getting a new ride. 

Jungkook was lounging on his front porch smoking a cigarette, his eyes shut in a dreamlike state, his jet black hair falling slightly down over the closed lids.  The bright rays of the summer day blessing his sun kissed skin in an angelic manner. 

“Hows my favorite pot-head” you grinned as you approached him, catching him off guard and causing him to flinch at the sound of your voice.  

Realizing it was just you he grinned and extended out a hand for you to help him stand up from the step he was relaxed on in front of his house. 

He stood tall and smoked one last drag on his cigarette before putting it out and opening his front door with a welcoming gesture inviting you inside. 

The scent of weed burned into your nose instantly when walking into his house, you loved the smell, you loved everything about it.  

Taehyung used to too… 

He was the most knowledgeable stoner you’d ever met.  He could even tell the strain of the weed he was smoking after just smelling it.  You and your friends used to quiz him for fun and he’d always ace every test without fail. 

You wondered if sometimes when he’d pull someone over and arrest them for the exact thing he used to partake in, he’d catch a whiff and know the name of their bud. 

It all seemed pretty hypocritical to you, but you have to remind yourself you both have grown up, people change, though you haven't much, you can’t blame him for it. 

Jungkook went over to a drawer and pulled out a large glass jar, carrying it with two hands over to a wooden coffee table near his couch.  You, knowing the drill, doing this trip to Jungkook’s at least once a week, had sat down on the couch to wait for him. 

Jungkook pulled a long un lit joint from the front pocket of his red flannel and held it between his lips with his eyes focused on the jar in front of him.

He pulled out a few nugs from the jar and put them on a cheap gram scale he had on his table, weighing it out to the eighth he knew was your regular purchase. 

“Isn’t this a little early to be here, how fast did you go through your last bag?” Jungkook chuckled, placing the nugs into a ziploc bag carefully.  

“Ugh” you sighed.  “Taehyung again” 

Jungkook knew just what you meant by that.  Taehyung used to be close friends with him as well before he became a cop.  They had a big falling out when Taehyung joined the force, Jungkook hated cops with a passion and said some choice words to Taehyung that had severed their relationship permanently.  It hurt to think about how things used to be, the three of you laughing and smoking, riding around in your old car flying on cloud 9.  Literally, the strain that was your favorite at the time was called cloud 9. 

Jungkook shook his head and pulled out a lighter from the same pocket the joint came from, lighting the tip for a second before inhaling and letting the smoke glide down his lungs, then passing it to you. 

“I don’t know how you can stand to be around him anymore” Jungkook grumbled. 

“First of all, I really don’t have a choice, actually I think we are having dinner with our families together later tonight.  Secondly” you made eye contact with Jungkook “Hes really not that bad.  It could be worse.  All I got was a soft warning and a milkshake”  you passed the joint back to Jungkook. 

“Until he gets some pressure from his higher ups to be more of a hardass.  I think your days of getting off easy are short lived y/n.  Enjoy it while it lasts.  He’s sold his soul to ‘the man’ trust me” He spoke between coughs from the rough hit he’d just took.  Putting air quotes around ‘the man’. 

You didn’t like the idea of that and you shut up for a bit, sharing the rest of the joint and paying Jungkook for your bag.  

He gave you a hug and a smile on your way out.  “Be more careful out there y/n” he winked and bumped your shoulder with his fist playfully. 

------------------------------------------------------

You went straight from Jungkook’s to your parents home where you were to have dinner with Taehyung’s family.  You sat in your car and quickly sprayed a massively overpowering amount of perfume on yourself hoping to mask the weed smell.  Then putting in some eyedrops to help with your glassy eyed expression you’d seen in your car mirror.  You winced at the way that it burned but were thankful for the relief that it gave to your dry eyes. 

When you arrived through the door your mom instantly ran over to you and embraced you in her signature hug, that always included a large inhale. 

“You smell like Marijauna” her eyes narrowed at you. 

“Oh no, not the Marijauna” you feigned shock and put your hands to your cheeks a surprised expression looking like the boy from home alone. 

She glared at you, not amused.  You knew your parents didn’t care that much, your dad especially.  They didn’t smoke but you knew your dad was a hippie in his day so he had no room to judge.  Your mom was slightly more judgemental but she usually just let you off with some snide comments and rude glances before returning to her normal bubbly self.  

She ran to her room and grabbed some febreeze and started chasing you around the house with it while you laughed, tears forming in both of your eyes at how ridiculous she was being. She was mostly worried about upsetting Taehyung’s family most likely.  Not that they were the type to judge either, but it was still made for a slightly more awkward dinner if it ended up getting brought up with Taehyung’s current position in life.  No one in town really knew how to act around him.  

You thought that must be tough on him.  People that were once his peers were now all terrified of him.  No one wanted to talk to him about anything more than casual small talk, and it was always very shallow conversation.  No one wanted to open up all of their deep secrets or emotions in front of a cop.  On the surface no one would think that it bothered him much.  He was good at keeping a constant blank expression that never let anyone into what he was thinking even back in highschool.  But, knowing Taehyung the way you knew him, it must bother him.

He was the life of the party, and now he's the buzzkill who crashes the parties. 

Taehyung’s family arrived and you all sat down to eat.  Your parents asked Taehyung about his job and how it’d been going.  He said he liked it and he was actually getting close to a promotion. 

His eyes flickered your way, almost like a small apology was hidden in that look.

You knew what that meant, no more getting off easily anymore.  Jungkook was right, the idea that you had a cop friend on your side was just a fun fantasy.  Next time you got caught by him, he wouldn’t be treating you like a friend one bit.

----------------------------------------------------------------

The moment came sooner than you’d thought.  You and Jungkook had been going on a late night taco bell run, smoking a joint the whole way there, and you as usual were carrying a decent amount of smoke in your bag. 

You had stopped in the parking lot, parked in the back to hotbox and eat in the car.  Hotboxing was one of the funnest activities you used to do in highschool and you had mentioned to Jungkook that it’d been way too long, he was more than happy to oblige. 

You were giggling like a child over the way the word ‘Taco’ sounded if you said it slowly when you were startled by a tapping noise on the window. 

Not able to see through the smoke fogged glass who had knocked on your window, you squinted then glanced to Jungkook, who stared wide eyed at the colors of blue and red flashing to the side of the car. 

“Fuckkkkkkk” he groaned, hitting the steering wheel roughly with a flat palm.  “Fuck fuck fuck.  Y/n you’re carrying a bag aren’t you” 

Your eyes grew wide, “Y-yeah…are you?” 

Jungkook gave you a ‘what do you think’ look

Of course he was. 

You sighed and rolled your window down, a wave of smoke pouring out and flowing right into the face of the officer standing there.  Fuck, it wasn’t Taehyung. 

“How’s it going officer?” you asked sweetly.  He was less than pleased. 

“Both of you. Step out of the car” he ordered sternly. 

You did as he said, and now realized that another officer sat in a separate car.  Taehyung…

“Officer Kim, can you assist me here” The older policeman spoke Taehyung’s way. 

He got out of the car, his uniform fit him way too sinfully, you’d always though he looked more like the cop from an old porno , than one you’d ever have taken seriously.  But, the expression he currently held on his face gave you the chills, and not in a good way. 

He glared your way, shaking his head in disappointment.  Jungkook was throwing dagger eyes towards Taehyung as he started to approach him to pat him down. 

“Oh fuck off Mr. High and mighty” Jungkook scoffed, stepping back from Taehyung. 

“Kook” you pleaded at your friend to take hold of his temper. The older cop had started to pat you down as you held your arms out.  Upon finding the bag in your pocket he waved it in the air like he’d hit the jackpot.

“Look what we’ve got here Officer Kim.  Someone’s been a naughty girl” he playful spoke.  The way he said that made you nauseous, you didn’t like the way he had just started behaving one bit.  But, what could you do. 

He continued his pat down, his hands lingering on your breasts for too long.  You shot him a glare and tried to recoil away from his touch. 

“Ah ah, you’d be surprised how many ladies try to hide illegal items in their bra’s thinking I wouldn’t check there” he grinned evilly. Fucking pig. You thought. 

You turned to see how things were going with Jungkook just in time to see him winding up a fist and throwing it forward into Taehyung's face. 

Shit. 

The hit sounded out like he’d damn near broken Taehyung’s nose, and the other officer was immediately to Taehyung’s side.  Both of them tackling Jungkook and pinning his arms behind his back securing them with handcuffs.  The older cop holding him down with a knee on his back pressing his face into the parking lot’s asphalt. 

You stood shaking in realization that Jungkook had just gotten himself into some real trouble.  All because of his stupid grudge with Taehyung.  If anyone else had gotten in a small tuff like that with an ex best friend, it probably would’ve just ended with a couple bloody noses and both men walking away feeling like they got the better hit in.  But because Taehyung was what he was now...it’s most likely going to end with Jungkook doing some time.  Assaulting a cop was definitely not a minor crime. 

They had scooped Jungkook off of the ground and shoved him into the backseat of the older officers cruiser. Jungkook cussed and grumbled the whole time.  

“I’m gonna take this one down to the station,” the Officer pointed to Jungkook “You take our little lady here home.  Maybe teach her a lesson on picking a better choice in boyfriend” he winked Taehyung’s way.  

You were appalled but not surprised at the older man’s behavior.  Some cops felt like they could get away with that shit...cuz well...they could. 

You followed Taehyung to his car silently with your head low, only lifting it once to send one last glance Jungkook’s way, catching his eyes for a second and both exchanging looks of worry.  Possibly a goodbye for a little while. 

Once you were in Taehyung’s car the waterworks came.  You held your face in your hands and sobbed loudly, your body convulsing with the heaviness of your emotions. 

Taehyung was quiet, pulling a few tissues from his glovebox and holding them to his nose tilting his head back. 

The two of you sat there for a while, silence lingering between you like some delicate thing just waiting to break. 

“I’m sorry” Taehyung whispered. 

“For what? Getting Jungkook arrested or for your pervy boss and his grabby hands?” You spat out with some fire, still slightly fucked up on the drugs you’d been inhaling. 

“Both...All of it…” he muttered, staring straight ahead and avoiding your piercing gaze.

“Why’d you even do this Tae? This job doesn’t suit you, I just don’t get it.  We’re best friends.  And look at us.” You motioned to the way you were sitting.  Him in the front, and you behind glass separating the space between the two of you.  You noted on how much of a metaphor for that felt like for the distance he’d put between you, differences between you now… 

“Regular Catwoman and Batman huh?” he murmured. 

Goddamnit.  And there's the exact reason you could never hate him.  “You fucking nerd.” You sighed chuckling and falling back into the seat shaking your head. “Oh my god. You’re not allowed to make me laugh right now.” 

Taehyung sent an apologetic smile your way. 

As upset as you were, his joking really did shift the tone in the car and you decided to tease him back. 

You put your wrists together and held them to the glass near Taehyung’s head. 

“Aren’t you gonna cuff me officer?” you said flirtatiously, batting your eyelashes at him.  Expecting him to roll his eyes and groan at your joke. 

Instead you were met with a serious expression.  His eyes lingering on your wrists and then trailing over to your lips.  His tongue darted out and licked over his bottom lick slightly. 

“Holy shit did that actually turn you on or something?”  you gasped, lowering your hands from his view. 

He instantly snapped out of the state of mind he had gone into so suddenly.  “Of course not” he snapped “Don’t be ridiculous” 

“Oh my god.  It did! I didn’t realize how kinky you were Kim Taehyung.” you winked at him “Handcuffs get you going? No wonder you became a cop.  You’re going to turn into old pervy Officer whatshisname aren’t you? Gross Tae,” You started to laugh. 

“Shut the fuck up, I’m not like that.” he barked loudly.  Instantly catching you off guard and having you sit up straight and rigid. 

“Sorry” you mumbled. “Officer” you added with a bit a spite. 

“Damn right.  You think you can just get away with all of this, with no consequences and no worries.  One day you’re going to have to grow up y/n.” 

“Oh like you?” you raised an eyebrow “No thank you...sir” 

You heard what sounded like a low growl from Taehyung.  

In an instant he sped up and parked the car in the far corner of the parking lot where the lot lights weren’t reaching. In hindsight that was probably where you and Jungkook should’ve been parked. 

Taehyung got out of the car and stood by your door.  You wondered if he wanted you to get out and join him outside the car.  But the car doors of police cars are always locked from the inside unless you have the key.  So you waited, for what seemed like painfully long time. 

You glanced out the window to see Taehyung pacing back and forth outside of the car with a hand pressed to his forehead, he was stressed.  Probably from the fact that he’d basically just sent Jungkook, his former best friend, to jail. 

Taehyung turned and rested a hand on the door handle.  Was he finally going to let you out? He seemed to be hesitating.  After what felt like forever the door clicked open and Taehyung was climbing into the back seat with you. 

“Oh hello?” you spoke in surprise. 

Taehyung didn’t speak, he continued his hungry gaze from earlier, biting his lip slightly and staring at you with bedroom eyes. 

“Taehyung…” you started before you were cut off. 

“I wanted this job to protect people.  I care about those close to me.  The older I got the more I realized how important that was.  Everyone thinks that I just want to bust them for weed or partying and be the killjoy of our town.  But, that wasn’t it.  Remember that summer that girl got drugged at that party.  No one was able to find the guy.  I wanted to be the type of person that could look out for people.  That could maybe do something about things like that.  It sucks that I had to give up some of my habits that I don’t necessarily agree with the laws on.  But I follow it, I sacrificed that to keep this town safe.  To help keep you safe” he added at the end.  His expression sincere.

“I guess I hadn’t really thought of it that way.  Jungkook probably hasn’t either…” 

“Yeah Jungkook doesn’t give a shit about my reasonings.  Fuck the police and all that.” he rolled his eyes. 

“I get it” you shrugged.  “That's actually a pretty decent reason.  I miss getting to hangout with you other places than the back of your cruiser though” you teased, poking him in the shoulder. 

“Mmm then maybe you should start behaving little girl” he growled in a tone you’d never heard him take with you before. 

“Tae..” you looked at him with furrowed brows, your mouth hanging open slightly in confusion. 

Before you knew it Taehyung's hand was clutching you jaw lightly, one finger trailing over your lips. 

“I’d always thought…” he whispered.  “Maybe one day, you’d calm down with all of this stuff, and we could…” he trailed off. 

You blinked rapidly in realization of what he was saying.  Did Taehyung really just imply what you think he did? You felt your hands start to shake slightly.  Not that you were completely opposed to it, but you just couldn’t understand why he would feel that way.  You’d on and off had a crush on Taehyung your whole life.  He was your first crush when you were just in elementary school.  You weren’t even sure if he’d remembered, but one day when you were probably only 7 and he was 8 years old, tiny little Tae had run up to you on the playground with a bouquet of yellow dandelions clutched in his small hand.  

“Y/n.  Will you marry me?” he had squeaked out. 

You had chuckled and taken the dandelions from his hand “Taehyunnnng, we’re too young to get married.” 

He had pouted cutely, crossing his arms across his chest. “Fine.  Well one day you will.  And I’ll buy you a big house, with a puppy, and a big garden.” You had nodded and said “Fine. One day a lonnng time from now. Promise” and the two of you had continued to play during your recess and it was never spoken of again. 

You’d occasionally think back on it as a funny memory.  But now, looking at him here.  The way he looked at you…and those words.  ‘Maybe one day you will’ ‘Maybe one day you would…’

“Tae…” you stuttered out again.

“Maybe you just need to learn a lesson or two.  Maybe I need to teach you how to behave.” he growled, his hand trailing over your lips was now making its way to your neck.  His thumb slightly pressing down on your jugular as he eyed you dangerously. 

You whispered under his touch but didn’t try to pull back.  You couldn’t deny to yourself that this excites you, it probably shouldn’t but you’d always been a sucker for a little pain. 

“Is that was you need hm?” he asked authoritatively. 

Should you?

“Y-yes…” you stammered out.  

“That’s what I thought” he hissed out. “That handcuff comment was uncalled for.  Maybe you were the one who wanted me to tie you up hm?” He started to move to pull out the handcuffs he kept on him, twirling them around on his middle finger. 

Your heart started to beat rapidly, and your breathing was becoming so quickened at the sight of Taehyung, your best friend Taehyung...Police officer Taehyung, in front of you, uniform and all, about to handcuff you for mutual pleasure. 

You nodded innocently. 

A low groan rumbled in his chest as he leaned over to you, pushing you down onto the backseat so your back was flat against the cushions. He now hovered over you, his face mere inches from your own, and a look of pure lust gazing down at you. 

He started to grab your hands and cuffed you to a spot they had in the cruiser that made his task of securing you quite easy.  The metal bit into your skin slightly but you could tell he made sure not to put them on too tight.  Your arms were now held over your head, and any thoughts of backing out had been pushed away.  You wanted him, you craved him, you needed this. 

Taehyung’s lips crashed down on to yours sloppily and wet, instantly slipping his tongue into your mouth as he held your jaw roughly with one hand. 

“I’m gonna fuck that dirty mouth of yours.  I’m going to teach you how to respect authority little girl” he growled, now straddling your hips and unbuttoning the belt of his uniform and tossing it to the side. 

He didn’t continue to undress himself.  Instead his hands pulled on the bottom of your shirt, rolling it up over your breasts and letting it sit high up on your chest, not being able to fully take it off due to the way you were cuffed. 

He let out a lustful moan and bit his lip at the sight of you. 

Of course you weren’t wearing a bra, he thought.  It was so like you to be like this, always the tease.  Taehyung had loved you for as long as he could remember, and finally he had you here underneath him.  Strangely when he used to picture fucking you in the back of a cop car (because he totally had fantasized about that) he wasn’t the cop.  But, here you were, and here he was, grown up and still exactly the way he had always pictured.  Your tits looked so incredible, better in person.  He’d never told you but when you’d gotten your nudes leaked around the town at one point by an ex boyfriend he happened to get a copy sent to him.  He had deleted it right away...if right away meant after jacking off to them first and then deleting them…

He felt bad about that, but he loved you so much and your body was completely irresistible to him, he didn’t know how he’d managed to make it this long in life without having you for himself. 

He gave your tits a few squeezes and lowered his head down to them, biting now on your nipple grazing his teeth over your skin, and loving the way you squirmed under him at the sensation.  He sucked and bit at you, making sure to roll the neglected nipple in his fingers while he did.

You were absolutely loving it. 

Taehyung then pulled back releasing you with a pop. He now started to unbutton the black uniform pants and pull out his enormous cock. 

Your jaw dropped at the mouth watering sight. 

You’d always assumed he was big, you’d seen him get hard in some swim shorts once at a pool party when you’d shown up in a skimpy swimsuit, but now seeing it fully you realized you’d underestimated the length and girth of him greatly.  You licked your lips hungrily, wanting a taste. 

“ You like that huh baby? Dirty little slut, so weak for my cock right now?” he grinned stroking himself slowly. 

You nodded in response, your eyes fixed on the length in front of you. 

He moved to position himself so it was right in front of your face and he was leaning over you. 

“Hungry little slut” he whispered.  He smacked you hard against the side of your cheek with his heavy cock, you were surprised but mostly turned on at the fact that it actually hurt a bit.  

“Are you gonna behave for me?” he asked sternly, looking down at you with a fucked out expression.  

“Maybe?” you teased. 

Whack. He smacked you again with his cock, slightly harder this time. 

“Don’t be a brat now.  You are going to behave, or I’ll make you behave. Okay?”  he growled. 

“Okay” you whimpered, trying to pretend that you weren’t totally in love with how he was acting, trying to play into the game. 

“Okay what” he snapped. 

“Okay...sir?” 

“Thats right.” he nodded.  Then placed his hand back around your jaw, gripping you tightly.  “You’re gonna open up and take my dick, allll the way. Let me fuck this dirty mouth of yours” he ordered. “And maybe once you’ve sucked every last drop of cum out of me, you’ll think a little more before you go around acting out.” 

“Yes sir” you nodded, parting your lips showing him that you were ready to take him. 

“Fuck,” he whispered, breaking the stern voice he’d been maintaining for a quick moment, letting on to just how excited he was to be this intimite with you. 

He pushed his hips forward, his hand on his shaft and the tip of his cock now sitting on your lips. 

“You’re okay with this right?” he whispered.  Gentleman Taehyung making an appearance for a moment

“Yes sir” you purred with a grin. 

“Get ready to take me then baby girl” he growled, going back to his previous demeanor. 

He pushed his cock into your mouth all the way, slowly, getting you adjusted to how huge he was and getting a feel for how much you could take.  To his delight he slid all the way down until your nose was buried into his abdomen. 

“Fuckkkk” he hissed out. “Such a Good girl for such a bad girl.”

He quickly pulled out and repeated slowly fucking his cock all the way into your mouth and quickly pulling out again.  

“Get ready baby” he moaned.  Then started to speed up his pace, his hips rolling into your mouth quickly, causing you to gag lewdly a few times as he did which only seemed to turn him on more, causing a pleasured hiss each time. 

“I fucking love this mouth baby.  You take me so well.” Taehyung was biting at his lip and staring down at you in awe. 

You moaned around his cock, the vibrations making him stutter and throwing him off his pace for a moment. 

“So good” he whispered.  You felt like that one wasn’t meant for you to hear, but you loved knowing how good you were making him feel so your heart skipped a bit at his praise. 

Taehyung gripped your hair, steadying your head and pumping himself into your at a fast pace.  

“Thats fucking it y/n.” He panted out “Fucking. Learn. How. To. Behave.” he growled and smacked a hand to the side of your face.  

Your eyes were watering and you felt a warm pool of wet growing between your legs.  You could get used to this Taehyung. 

“I’m gonna cum in your mouth and you’re going to swallow every. Last. fucking. Drop.” he pounded into you in sync with each of those last words. 

You stared up at him with flirtatious eyes and smiled slightly. 

“Damn those eyes are dangerous” he groaned and with that you felt him tense up and his pace grow uneven.  

“Shit. Fuck. Y/n. Oh my god” he screamed out while emptying himself into your mouth.  His cock twitching wildly as he fucked into you.  You closed your lips around him as he pulled out, sucking slightly to get every last drop as he’d ordered. 

He looked down at you with pure joy as you stick out your tongue to show him his cum pooled up and gathered in your mouth before rolling it back into your mouth and swallowing with a loud gulp. 

“Wow.” he stared wide eyed at you.  “So fucking hot”  gasped out

He now went to the cuffs and pulled his key out, releasing you from your restraints. 

Taehyung rested down on top of you where you still laid.  His head on your chest. 

“You alright man?” you chuckled running your fingers through his sweat drenched hair.

“Mhm” he smiled widely with his eyes closed “That was amazing” 

This cute Taehyung that cuddled up next to you now was a Taehyung you thought you’d lost long ago.  Your heart felt full and warm seeing him this way. 

“Soooo are we returning the favor or?” you joked

His head snapped up he hovered over your face and looked at you with a playful expression.  “Nope. that’s your punishment for getting caught.” 

“For getting caught huh?”

“Well yeah.  You don’t have to stop doing what you love y/n.  For God sake, if you’re going to date a cop you can’t be that reckless with it thought.  Keep it in the house and where you’re for sure safe from anyone catching you or calling me to come check out the situation” he rolled his eyes. 

You sighed. “I guess I can manage that.  Wait...date? A cop? Wait…” you started to stutter realizing what he’d said. 

“Well you promised you’d marry me one day remember? but, I figured dating is a good place to start” he grinned with a wink. 

You felt butterflies in your stomach at his recollection of that day so long ago. 

“What an odd pair we’ll be” you chuckled. 

“Yeah… oh also I’m gonna get things with Jungkook figured out okay.  I feel like shit about it, and I’m going to make sure everyone at the station knows he didn’t mean it, and I barely got a scratch on me.” he let you know. 

You nodded, almost forgetting about Jungkook. 

“I think that’d be a good idea Tae, I think he honestly misses you, you know?” 

“Yeah I miss him too…”

You planted a small peck on Taehyung’s lips.  “You’ll get it figured out.  I know you will.” 

Taehyung smiled down at you and returned your quick peck. 

“How are you so bad and so good all at the same time” he shook his head. 

“I guess that's just what you like in a future wife” you teased. 

“I suppose so,” he replied.  Except he knew, that he meant every word.

  Love is such a funny thing.

[safetypinkerton]

Hollywood Propaganda by Mark Dice 

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/hollywood-propaganda-mark-dice/1137833508

Christianity Under Attack

In order to destroy America, the conspirators are determined to eradicate faith in God and dismantle organized Christianity. Attacking Jesus and Christianity is a sacrament in Hollywood because the far-Left hates Jesus and everything He stands for. It’s not an overstatement to say that many in key positions of power in the entertainment industry (and politics) are Satanists who will someday openly embrace Lucifer as the rebel angel kicked out of Heaven for defying God.

  “I’m glad the Jews killed Christ,” ranted comedian Sarah Silverman in one of her comedy specials. “Good. I’d fucking do it again!” she declares, as her audience agrees in laughter.158 While accepting an Emmy Award one year Kathy Griffin said, “A lot of people come up here and they thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus. He didn’t help me a bit…so all I can say is suck it Jesus! This award is my god now!”159

I’m not saying people shouldn’t be able to make fun of Christians, but no mainstream celebrity would dare make such insults or jokes about Muhammad because Muslims (and Jews) are vigorously protected against any criticism or mockery and only wonderful things can be said about them. Even a slightly edgy joke ignites a barrage of attacks with cries of “Islamophobia” or “anti-Semitism” and gears start moving in the well-funded and massive smear machines like the ADL and the SPLC which quickly move to destroy the person’s career before they can utter another word.

Hating Christians is almost as necessary as believing in climate change if you’re going to be a mainstream Hollywood celebrity. There are very few open Christians in Hollywood, most of them are has-beens like Kevin Sorbo and Kirk Cameron who have been basically blacklisted since being open about their faith.

  Kevin Sorbo was banned from Comicon because he’s a conservative and “pals with Sean Hannity.”160 He and other Christian actors are stuck doing low budget films that get little attention. They’re allowed to exist (for now) as long as they never point out the Bible’s teachings on homosexuality. Only watered down and generic Christian messages are allowed to be said.

After Guardians of the Galaxy star Chris Pratt appeared on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert and happened to discuss his “spirituality,” many online began attacking him for being a Christian and attending a church. Actress Ellen Page (a lesbian) from the X-Men and Inception tweeted, “If you are a famous actor and you belong to an organization that hates a certain group of people, don’t be surprised if someone simply wonders why it’s not addressed. Being anti LGBTQ is wrong, there aren’t two sides. The damage it causes is severe. Full stop.”161

Singer Ellie Goulding threatened to back out of her scheduled performance at the 2019 Thanksgiving NFL halftime show if the Salvation Army didn’t pledge to donate money to LGBT causes. She got the idea after her Instagram comments were flooded with complaints from her fans because the Salvation Army was sponsoring the game to announce their annual Red Kettle Campaign (bell ringers) fundraiser for the homeless.162 Since the Salvation Army is a Christian charity, Goulding’s fans freaked out, accusing them of being “homophobic” and “transphobic.”

They quickly bowed to the pressure and “disavowed” any anti-LGBT beliefs, which basically means they’re disavowing the Bible because even the New Testament denounces homosexuality in Romans 1:26-27 and 1st Corinthians 6:9-10. Many critics claim that only the Old Testament does, but the Book of Romans makes it clear that just because Jesus came to offer salvation doesn’t mean God’s law regarding homosexuality changed.

The Salvation Army also removed a “position statement” from their website that had made it clear “Scripture forbids sexual intimacy between members of the same sex,” and replaced it with one saying “We embrace people regardless of race, gender, ethnicity, sexual orientation, or gender identity.”163 One of the world’s largest Christian charities whose very name “The Salvation Army” refers to the salvation of Christ, cowardly bowed down to the Leftist activists out of fear they would be branded “homophobic.”

Christians are easy targets since they’re much more passive than Jews and Muslims when attacked, and Hollywood loves to stereotype them as a bunch of superstitious bigots who don’t know how to have fun. In the rare case that there is a movie favorable to Christianity that gets widespread distribution, that too is attacked.

Passion of the Christ was deemed “anti-Semitic” because it depicts the story of Jesus’ arrest, sham trial, and crucifixion.164 It was the most popular film about the events to be made and wasn’t a straight to DVD release like most others. With Mel Gibson behind it, the film became a huge success, which caused a tremendous backlash.

The ADL [Anti-Defamation League] denounced the film, saying it “continues its unambiguous portrayal of Jews as being responsible for the death of Jesus. There is no question in this film about who is responsible. At every single opportunity, Mr. Gibson’s film reinforces the notion that the Jewish authorities and the Jewish mob are the ones ultimately responsible for the Crucifixion.”165 That’s because that’s what happened!

Technically, the Romans did it, but at the behest of the Jewish leadership in Jerusalem at the time. The Bible makes it very clear what led to Jesus being crucified. Pontius Pilate is quoted in Matthew 27:24 saying, “I am innocent of this man’s blood,” and “It is your responsibility!” meaning the Jewish Pharisees. They were the ones who conspired to have Jesus arrested and killed for “blasphemy” and being a “false” messiah. Pontius Pilate even offered to release Jesus, but the crowd demanded he release Barabbas instead, another man who was being detained for insurrection against Rome, and for murder.166

A critic for the New York Daily News called The Passion of the Christ, “the most virulently anti-Semitic movie made since the German propaganda films of the Second World War.”167 Many others angrily denounced the film when it came out in 2004. Some in the media even blamed it for a supposed “upsurge” in anti-Semitic hate crimes.168

When the History Channel miniseries The Bible was released in 2013, the same cries of “anti-Semitism” rang out.169 The New York Times opinion editor Bari Weiss went so far as to say that it’s a “conspiracy theory” that Jews killed Jesus.170

Even though most Christmas movies aren’t overtly Christian and instead focus of the importance of families reuniting and spending time together, that doesn’t mean they’re not going to come under attack. As the war on western culture continues, the Marxists have set their sights on Christmas too.

Online liberal cesspool Salon.com ran a headline reading “Hallmark movies are fascist propaganda,” and complained they promote “heteronormative whiteness” because there aren’t enough LGBT characters or people of color in them.171

“Hallmark movies, with their emphasis on returning home and the pleasures of the small, domestic life, also send a not-at-all subtle signal of disdain for cosmopolitanism and curiosity about the larger world,” Salon said, “which is exactly the sort of attitude that helps breed the kind of defensive White nationalism that we see growing in strength in the Donald Trump era.”172

The article went on to say that because the Hallmark Channel airs so many Christmas movies, it is promoting, “a set of patriarchal and authoritarian values that are more about White evangelicals defining themselves as an ethnic group, and not about a genuine feeling of spirituality…The very fact that they’re presented as harmless fluff makes it all the more insidious, the way they work to enforce very narrow, White, heteronormative, sexist, provincial ideas of what constitutes ‘normal.’”173

The article wasn’t satire. Salon.com has a deep-seated hatred of Christianity, conservatives and families, and is another cog in the Cultural Marxist machine working to destroy the United States.

Comedian Whitney Cummings was reported to the Human Resources department of a major Hollywood studio after she wished the crew of a TV show she was working on “Merry Christmas” when they wrapped up for the year. She made the revelation while speaking with Conan O’Brian the following December. “Last year, I was working on a TV show, [and] got in trouble with Human Resources for saying ‘Merry Christmas’ to an intern,” she began.174

Conan asked her if she was being serious and she said it was a true story, elaborating, “I was leaving, like on the 18th or whatever…and I was like, ‘Bye guys, Merry Christmas.’” When she returned from vacation after New Year’s she was called to HR and scolded. She joked, “I don’t even care how your Christmas was. It was just a formality. It’s what you say when you leave.”175

Conan O’Brien then replied, “In these times we’re in, that could trigger someone or offend them if it’s not their holiday.”176 She didn’t say which network it was, but she’s been involved with some major shows like NBC’s Whitney (where she played the main character), as well as the CBS sitcom 2 Broke Girls, which she created and was a writer for.

While today it may seem impossible that Christmas movies may become a thing of the past, nobody could have ever guessed that reruns of the classic Dukes of Hazzard would get banned after the Confederate flag was deemed a “hate symbol” in 2015, or that Aunt Jemima pancake syrup, Eskimo Pie ice cream bars, and Uncle Ben’s Rice would be deemed “racially insensitive” and pulled from production a few years later.177

Once someone reminds liberals that the word Christmas is derived from Christ’s Mass and that it is actually a commemoration of the birth of Jesus, they may finally go over the edge and deem Christmas just as offensive as Columbus Day or the Fourth of July. And with the Muslim and Sikh populations increasing in the United States, the American standard of Christmas music playing in shopping malls and retail stores all month long every December may one day come to an end because it’s not “inclusive” and leaves non-Christians feeling “ostracized.”

[revisionaryhistory]

Three Days ~ 10

~*~Sebastian~*~

 I parked next to Emma, grabbed the food, and followed her into the condo. The door opened directly into the family room. There were wood floors with a large patina gray and blue area rug. She had one of those couches with a chaise on one end. There was an oversized chair with an ottoman in the same dark gray. Tables sat at either end of the couch. Natural light flooded the room from a window on one wall and French doors on the other. A TV hung in the corner of the front door and window wall with a fireplace between the TV and windows. Pillows in a blue to match the rug and a dark berry were tossed on the chair and in the corner under the TV were a stack of three big floor cushions. My guess was they were for sitting in front of the fire. The room felt comfortable. I wanted to jump onto the chaise and hug one of the berry pillows.

I followed Emma's lead and kicked my shoes off in the entry. I don't wear shoes in my place either. New York streets are disgusting. I don't want that shit tracked through my home.

 She headed left to the kitchen. It was an open floor plan with a breakfast bar separating the two rooms. Grey fabric bar stools tied the areas together. Lower cabinets where black, uppers white, Carrara marble counter tops, and black appliances. There was another window over the farmhouse sink.

 "Wow. I love your kitchen." 

She smiled at me over her shoulder, "Thank you." 

I almost lost the ability to breathe. Her shy smile dropped my heart to my knees. She looked so beautiful with her hair messed up from where she'd pulled it out of the ponytail. Seeing her against the backdrop of her house... breath taking. 

I put our food on the bar, "Can I use your bathroom?" 

"Of course." She pointed to a door in the far corner of the kitchen. "Ignore the clothes." 

I closed the door behind me. Laundry room and bathroom. Convenient. There was a pile of folded clothes on a long counter across from the washer and dryer. 

When I came out, she had lunch set out. I sat on the stool next to her and put the roll I'd grabbed for her in the top of her take out container, "For you." 

"Thank you." 

I jumped in where we left off at Whole Foods. "It's really thoughtful how you use people's names."

 "I think everyone likes to hear their name and most people don't even look at the person checking them out or bringing their food." She looked over from her salad, "It may sound naive, but I hope that small nicety makes their day better."

"Wouldn't be surprised if it did. I don't think it’s naive. It's nice. Lots of people don't think to do the nice thing. Those small acts of kindness can change the world for someone." 

"Our brains involuntarily respond to the sound of our own names, even if we're unable to respond to or act on anything else." She smirked, "Can you ignore it when someone yells your name?" 

I'd just shoved a forkful of salad in my mouth. I chewed and shook my head. "Nope." I pointed my fork at my ear. "I wear earbuds a lot." I cringed, "Don't take that the wrong way. When I'm at an event or on a stage and people are screaming my name it's... fantastic and humbling. I'd be crushed if they stopped. But when I'm going about my day it's easier. I know people who can ignore hearing their name, but I can't. So, if I hear my name I look over and usually it’s taken as an ok to come over and talk." I cringed again. "It is. I like talking to fans. I love hearing stories. Most people aren't rude." My shoulders slumped, "Sometimes I just want to get to the subway and go to my friend's place." I shrugged and tilted my head, looking at her, "Earbuds." 

She nodded, "I get it. Those guys at the restaurant weren't rude and didn't stay too long." 

"I don't like when someone interrupts when I'm eating. They waited and, like you said, didn't stay too long." 

She looked curious, "What if they had?" 

"The hostess recognized me, so management knew we were there. Usually, if someone stays too long or lots of people start coming over, management will clear them away. If they hadn't, I would have gotten us out of there." 

She laughed, "Do you always know an exit route?" 

"Not even close." I laughed too, "I'm good at winging it." 

She ran her hand down my bicep, "If I made you uncomfortable, l'm sorry." 

I'd done a lot of cringing in the last few minutes. "Nothing to be sorry about. I'd rather you ask." Pretty sure I was looking uncomfortable again. "I don't want you to think I don't realize how blessed I am." 

Emma stopped me with another touch on my arm, "Not at all, Sebastian. Privacy shouldn't be the price you pay for doing what you love." 

This would also be a perfect time for a kiss. However, one of us had a mouthful of blue cheese and spinach. 

It wasn't me.

 We laughed and talked about the gym while finishing eating. There was a lot to laugh about from the yoga class. The woman who kept shushing us scared me. It was a good thing Emma got us out of there. She didn't believe me and laughed. When she laughs, she gets the cutest dimple in her cheek. Just one. Left cheek.

 Emma closed the lid on what was left of her salad, "You were right. The roll was delicious." 

"I would never lie about bread." I was finished too and closed the lid.

 Emma stuffed the containers back in the bag then into a garbage can under the sink. She came back around the breakfast bar, "I'll get you towels and show you where everything is."

 I grabbed my bag and followed her up the stairs. The bathroom was the first door on the right. Emma opened the second door, pulled out a set of towels and a washcloth, and handed them to me. "Thank you."

 "No problem." She pointed to the third door. "That's the guest room. You can use it if you want. I'll meet you back downstairs."

 I nodded and walked into the bathroom. When I pulled my phone out of my shorts, I noticed the blinking light. My mom texted asking what time I'd be home and when I was leaving tomorrow. Fuck. I was taking the train back to the city tomorrow morning. I leaned on the counter and looked at myself in the mirror. I watched myself start to smile. I rolled my eyes. I wasn't taking a train anywhere in the morning.

 Naturally, I over thought this in the shower. There were tradeoffs to be made. I felt guilty blowing off helping my parents to go to a festival with Emma. If I stayed through tomorrow it would negate skipping out today. I could leave Monday morning. But that was the holiday. Schools are closed. Wonder if Emma has plans? I had plans Monday, but nothing I couldn't skip out on.

 I realize I've only known her twenty-four hours and I'm making decisions based on the rest of the day going well. I don't know why it wouldn't. This has been good and fun. Who the hell knows where it will go, but there's a little voice telling me not to go home yet.

 I beat her downstairs and sent a few texts updating my plans while stretched out on the chaise. The remote was on the table next to me. I hit the power button and brought up something like Netflix, but wasn't.

 I heard Emma come down the stairs and looked over, "Hey, what's this Plex thing?"

 She sat down on the other end of the couch. Too far away. "You look really good in that color, Seb."

 I looked down to see what I'd put on. Dark red t-shirt. "Thanks."

 Emma smiled and nodded to the TV, "My father digitized his entire movie and TV series collection. Plex organizes everything. It's like your own personal Netflix."

 I'd been poking around for a little while, "This is cool. How does it group things into collections?"

 "We do it. I can sign into the server and add things to favorites or fuck around with Amy's."

 I clicked on Fave-Emma. "You like a lot of reality TV."

 Emma laughed, "That’s Amy messing with me. I hate reality TV. It's like the worst parts of people sensationalized for the masses. I don't like watching people be horrible to each other. I don't like people being put in prescribed situations and rewarded for being nasty."

 It was cute how worked up she was. I must have smiled.

 "What?"

 I raised my shoulders, "No Survivor or Keeping up with the Kardashian's for you."

 She understood I was teasing, "Or Big Brother or American MasterChef. Australian MasterChef is good. I like Great British Bake off and The Repair Shop. Polite British reality TV."

 "What about movies?"

 Her demeanor changed to wide eyed excitement. "Oh, they're completely different. They're not real people being horrible. It's scripted. I love in movies what I hate in reality TV. One of my favorite movies is 'Closer' and it's," she shook her head and cringed, "harsh."

 I startled, "With Natalie Portman?"

 She nodded, "Love it. It's one of the most honest movies I've ever seen."

 I sat up, threw my head back, and put my hand up, pretending to be exasperated. "Honest? Everyone in that movie was a big fat liar." Her smile let me know she recognized the quote from the movie.

 "Everyone is incredibly unlikable, but Larry didn't lie."

 I raised my eyebrows.

 She stuck her tongue out a little and pointed at me, "He was a horrible person, but not a liar. He was so hurt when Anna cheated."

 I leaned forward, "No, no, no. That scene was horrifying."

 "Yes, but it was real in how people can destroy each other. The whole interchange where he wanted to know all the details. Where they were, what they did. He even asked what the other guy's cum tasted like." She fell back onto the couch. “In a movie full of lies that was the most honest thing I've ever seen." 

I leaned back, mirroring her. Partly because I wanted to pounce on her. The back and forth had been fun with both of us fervently involved in the conversation. Then she used the words “what his cum tasted like” and my brain short circuited a little. I laced my fingers on my chest and thought. I turned my head to look at her, "You're right. I remember sitting in the theater with my mouth hanging open. I thought it was the language, because it was almost obscene. Only now... I wonder if it was because it was a brutally unsanitized version of a break up."

 She smiled and shrugged one shoulder, "Made you think."

 "It's the teacher in you."

"Occupational hazard."

Important question. "Are first grade teachers allowed to say the word cum?"

She drew her eyebrows down with a look of disgust, "Not in front of the children."

 I laughed so loud I startled myself.

Emma shook her head, stood up, and held out her hand to me, "Let's go play, Sebastian."

 I took her hand, letting her pull me up. I put up enough resistance for her to drag me out the door. As soon as I closed the vehicle door behind her, I realized I'd missed the perfect moment. When she pulled me off the couch, I should have pulled her back, taken her in my arms, and kissed her.

I fucking missed it. Again.

 We pulled out and Emma told me which way to go. “One of my favorites is similar. Husbands and Wives. It’s funny and tragic. It’s real too. You'd probably like it. Godfather. Lots of classics for the acting and film making. I loved Boogie Nights.  Life of a male porn star. I enjoyed seeing how the porn industry worked."

"Tempted?" Mischief was in those green eyes.

 "Porn and acting aren't always so very different. Scum bags in both."  I wanted to hear more from her. "What do you love besides fucking cavemen?" Another quote from Closer.

 "Um, Sliding Doors. Princess Bride. I like trilogies. Lord of the Rings is the best thing ever. The extended cuts. Dad is a huge Tolkien fan. He read us the Hobbit when we were little. We couldn't focus on reading the Fellowship, but the movies worked. Loved The Force Awakens.”

I could tell by what she didn’t say she wasn't in love with number two, "Opinion on Last Jedi?"

 "Hated everything about Canto Bight. They made Poe both stupid and sexist." She growled, "Fucked up script."

 I nodded. I was biting my tongue. I wasn’t a stranger to fucked up scripts. I wanted to ask. She would tell the truth, which was good, but I didn't know the way she'd go. Next stoplight I looked over, "Dare I ask?"

 She laughed, "Don't care for the Hulk. Like Spiderman and Ant Man only in ensemble movies, not the solo films. Love Tony's genius and arrogance. I almost peed my pants because of fat Thor. Love Wanda and Nat. Love everyone in Guardians except Peter Quill and not just because he could have stopped Thanos. I thought I just didn't like Pratt because I didn’t like him in 10 Years and Parks and Rec, but loved Jurassic World. So its Peter. I can watch baby Groot dance all day. Did I miss anybody?" Her eyebrows were pulled down with the question she was facetiously asking.

I went with it. "Falcon. Hawkeye, Vision." Left out a couple of major players. The one’s I really wanted an opinion on. I put the ball back in her court.

"Snarky fun, steady, a bit over bearing." I just nodded and we were quiet. A few seconds passed before she put her hand on my arm, "I can't keep this up. Seems mean."

"A little teasing never hurt me."

 She smiled and went on. "At the beginning Steve and Bucky were all boy. They ragged on each other and I didn't really care for either. I know they were best friends, but I didn’t like how they interacted. Bucky was cocky and dismissive of Steve. Steve was annoying in his earnestness. I liked how the characters grew. Beautiful bad boy, who’s not really bad. I like broken characters. Bucky is definitely broken. Was broken. We'll see."

 I was good with her take on Bucky and Steve. I don’t completely disagree. "I hear there are plans for Bucky."

"You would know."

I nodded, "You thought Bucky was beautiful?" I said this with a straight face and looked at the road.

"Wanna know a secret?" 

I guessed she didn't want to answer, "Sure."

"Bucky is much hotter than Steve."

"I think I'm glad to hear that." Yeah, more than good with her opinion.

 Parking was a bitch. The positive about parking so fucking far away is I got to walk a couple of blocks down the street holding my date's hand. It's amazing how sometimes the simplest things make me happiest. Right now, I'm pretty damn happy.

[baileys-quarantine-journal]

Day 1: “it’s getting hard to be someone but it all works out”🍓

Day 1:

bonjour mes amis. today i start this ‘corona journal’ as a daily log and outlet as I cope with this quarantine. as an ESFJ, someone with a dire need for human connection and physical touch, and as someone with diagnosed major depression and generalized anxiety, just the couple of weeks since school has shut down with the rest of life as I’ve always known it have been increasingly scary and difficult for me. so here is my shit. i hope that if you are reading this you may be able to find some form of comfort or solace in this, and know that you are not alone. i’m tired of rules so i’m gonna make this the E.E. Cummings of blogs and give 0 fucks, cuz that is about all I have left in me...

today was a hard day, thus inspiring this creation. i had to open today, working at the grocery store as a cashier from 7-2 pm. yesterday i got an awful migraine at work which threw me into a series of catastrophic thoughts self-diagnosing me with covid. which has happened far more than once. unfortunately my anxiety has led me down the path of what i would call ‘phantom symptoms’. things like shortness of breath are something that comes from my anxiety (and actually sent me to the ER once before I figured out it was just a panic attack). and conveniently that is also a symptom of covid. so i am sure you could imagine the vicious cycle that this creates. my dad told me about my stepmom’s best friend who went to a ski resort and then found out someone had it there. she then reported a sore throat. but my dad said that if that happened to him he would probably feel a sore throat to and i find some calming value in that thought (he also suffers from anxiety). to quote one of my heroes george harrison, “it’s all in the mind” and although georgie was probs talking about LSD or some mantra repeated while plucking away at his sitar, i find meaning in that. it is important to remember that a lot of what we are feeling may have more internal cause than external. anyways, I got home yesterday and k.o.ed at 6 and woke up at 10 ish. by then i said fuck it and went back to bed an hour later cuz i knew i would have to be right back at work in the morning. today i woke up 20 minutes before work. i’ve been taking my mom’s 2008 odyssey to work most days during this weird fever dream which has been very helpful. i got my license about a month ago. i am very glad i did it before all of this craziness truly began because at least now i have a way to get out when i need it. a little escape into the car radio is very very necessary sometimes. this past week my main coping strategies have been listening to fleetwood mac and playing mario galaxy 2 however these can only go so far lol. strongly recommend both though ;) screaming “damn your love damn your lies” in the car like you’ve really been wronged is surprisingly VERY cathartic. today work went by mostly fast and painless, thankfully. after i got home i found myself caught back in a snapchat and twitter loop in my unmade bed in my messy room (which i hate to keep messy). i really believe in the idea of clean space clean mind. because my room is usually a solid reflection of my mental health, and my room definitely affects my mood in turn. 

after a certain point, a conversation with a close friend where i crossed a boundary and started momming them awakened me to how tense i was. i decided to go for a walk. the first thing i saw was a little playground with caution tape around it. there is something eerie about that but it looked so silly considering it is a tiny toddler sized playground. i walked the path around my neighborhood and this is when thoughts began to pour. you never ever think you will live through something as crazy as this until it happens. i thought about people who wrote through insane times, like Anne Frank for example. not to say i am experiencing a plight anywhere near hers, but, i just thought about the fact that one day some historian might read this blog post and archive it in some fancy futuristic file and use it as an example of how the youth of america experienced the covid-19 virus in the year 2020. i honestly have felt such insane denial throughout all this. this can’t be real right? missing a month or more of school? grocery stores looking like a best buy on black friday?? these are things i could have never imagined. and yet i feel nothing. maybe it is just my nature that it is hard to surprise me after all i have seen. or perhaps it is just the nature of my generation. the psychologists and sociologists in me would love to have these answers. i walked across the street to a park area i have roamed since childhood. i sat on my favorite rock bench. this is what i refer to as my happy place but today it did not look or feel so happy. the sky was gray and dreary and the only life surrounding me were some sweet little ducks. oh to be a blissfully unaware duck during such trying times. memories surrounded me on this walk. i remembered how months prior there was a pride fest in this very place, and a carnival, and how i danced in front of a stage to cover bands of earth, wind, and fire and the beatles. and i also remembered walking on these paths in 1st and 2nd grade feeding wonder-bread to ducks (i'm so sorry babies), and rolling down the hill, and that one time my dad pushed me over the little bridge on the stroller so fast that a fun time ended with me slinging out and scraping my little knees. memories of what i call the secret garden where i went to see the flowers every spring, and took pictures at quinces at, and snuck to during theatre rehearsals in middle school. but there was barely a soul there today. no flowers and no light. i cried. i closed my eyes and breathed in the wind that was rustling the trees. at sundown i walked home and showered and decided i might as well poor all of this out before i lose it. i love making playlists so maybe i will start a quarantine one to share or do some daily song suggestions.

today’s song (where the heading quote is derived from) :  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HtUH9z_Oey8

some pictures from my excursion today: 

[garbagequeer]

hey hello im writing a piece for laptop ensemble that involves sampling and i need the most repressed/tender/yearning quotes you got. just as gay and heart wrenching as you can. but also no pressure I know youre a stranger on the web I just feel like you post that kind of stuff a lot thank you bye

hope this isnt like too late school keeps me busy :( (also can you put a read more on asks? guess i’ll find out). i ended up choosing many quotes from the same texts cause im indecisive as shit but i’ll bold my favorites from those in case that makes it easier for you!

anyways first of all you can never go wrong w richard siken as obvious as that is. these are both from you are jeff

You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and he won’t tell you that he loves you, but he loves you. And you feel like you’ve done something terrible, like robbed a liquor store, or swallowed pills, or shoveled yourself a grave in the dirt, and you’re tired. You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and you’re trying not to tell him that you love him, and you’re trying to choke down the feeling, and you’re trembling, but he reaches over and he touches you, like a prayer for which no words exist, and you feel your heart taking root in your body, like you’ve discovered something you don’t even have a name for.

Let’s say you’ve swallowed a bad thing and now it’s got its hands inside you. This is the essence of love and failure. You see what I mean but you’re happy anyway, and that’s okay, it’s a love story 

this one’s from planet of love (the format got fucked bc tumblr is not actually a finctional website but :/ )

I have a megaphone and you play along,                                                                 because you want to die for love,                                                            you always have.     Imagine this:You’re pulling the car over. Somebody’s waiting.                      You’re going to die                                            in your best friend’s arms.             And you play along because it’s funny, because it’s written down,you’ve memorized it,

from litany in which certain things are crossed out 

I make you pancakes, I take you hunting, I talk to you as if you’re            really there.Are you there, sweetheart? Do you know me? Is this microphone live?                                                       Let me do it right for once,

sorry about the scene at the bottom of the stairwell                                    and how I ruined everything by saying it out loud.            Especially that, but I should have known.You see, I take the parts that I remember and stitch them back together            to make a creature that will do what I sayor love me back.

We were inside the train car when I started to cry. You were crying too,            smiling and crying in a way that made meeven more hysterical. You said I could have anything I wanted, but I                                                                                just couldn’t say it out loud.Actually, you said Love, for you,                             is larger than the usual romantic love. It’s like a religion. It’s                                                                                                 terrifying. No one                                                                        will ever want to sleep with you.

from snow and dirty rain

I had a dream about you. We were in the gold roomwhere everyone finally gets what they want.

that scene from when harry met sally where sally says:

One day I was taking Alice’s little girl fro the afternoon. I’d promised to take her to the circus, and we were in a cab playing “I spy” - you know, “I spy a lamppost”, “I spy a mailbox” - and she looked out the window and there was this man and this woman with two little kids, and the man had one of the kids on his shoulders, and Alice’s little girl said “I spy a family”, and I satrted crying, you know? I just started crying, and I went home

(like anyone else sometimes cries when u see a family doing something nice? is it because i want to participate in a sense of family of my own but have been excluded as a gay person from it’s portrayals and it makes me go :^( cause i dont feel there’s room for me there but i want there to be and i just have to long for this nuclear family heteronormative way of life that i’ve been made to believe is idylic? is it because my parents got divorced and my dad’s an ass and my mom is just a very angry lady and i want to re-do my own childhood? who knows. should we ban movies? yes we should!)

from maurice (ultimate source of tender)

“There was something better in life than this rubbish, if only he could get to it, love, nobility, big spaces where passion clasped peace, spaces no science could reach, but they existed for ever, full of woods some of them, and arched with majestic sky and a friend”

‘Did you ever dream you had a friend, Alec? Nothing else but just “my friend”, he trying to help you and you him. A friend’ he repeated, sentimental suddenly. ‘Someone to last your whole life and you his. I suppose such a thing can’t really happen outside sleep’

we are all so lucky i don’t actually own maurice in english this would just turn into me quoting the whole book

ee cummings voices to voices, lip to lip

the thing perhaps isto eat flowers and not to be afraid.

from virgina woolf’s letters to vita

7 september 1925

january 21 1926 vita writes

I am reduced to a thing that wants Virginia. I composed a beautiful letter to you in the sleepless nightmare hours of the night, and it has all gone: I just miss you, in a quite simple desperate human way. You, with all your un-dumb letters, would never write so elementary phrase as that; perhaps you wouldn’t even feel it. And yet I believe you’ll be sensible of a little gap. But you’d clothe it in so exquisite a phrase that it would lose a little of its reality. Whereas with me it is quite stark: I miss you even more than I could have believed; and I was prepared to miss you a good deal. So this letter is just really a squeal of pain. It is incredible how essential to me you have become. I suppose you are accustomed to people saying these things. Damn you, spoilt creature; I shan’t make you love me any the more by giving myself away like this—But oh my dear, I can’t be clever and stand-offish with you: I love you too much for that. Too truly. You have no idea how stand-offish I can be with people I don’t love. I have brought it to a fine art. But you have broken down my defences. And I don’t really resent it …

and on january 26 virginia writes back

Your letter from Trieste came this morning—But why do you think I don’t feel, or that I make phrases? ‘Lovely phrases’ you say which rob things of reality. Just the opposite. Always, always, always I try to say what I feel. Will you then believe that after you went last Tuesday—exactly a week ago—out I went into the slums of Bloomsbury, to find a barrel organ. But it did not make me cheerful … And ever since, nothing important has happened—Somehow its dull and damp. I have been dull; I have missed you. I do miss you. I shall miss you. And if you don’t believe it, you’re a longeared owl and ass. Lovely phrases? … 

from virginia’s diary, about vita on december 21 1925

I like her and being with her and the splendour–she shines in the grocer’s shop in Sevenoaks with a candle lit radiance, stalking on legs like beech trees, pink glowing, grape clustered, pearl hung.

from virginia woolf’s to the light house

What device for becoming, like waters poured into one jar, inextricably the same, one with the object one adored? Could the body achieve, or the mind, subtly mingling in the intricate passages of the brain? or the heart? Could loving, as people called it, make her and Mrs Ramsay one? for it was not knowledge but unity that she desired, not inscriptions on tablets, nothing that could be written in any language known to men, but intimacy itself, which is knowledge, she had thought, leaning her head on Mrs Ramsay’s knee. Nothing happened. Nothing! Nothing! as she leant her head against Mrs Ramsay’s knee. And yet, she knew knowledge and wisdom were stored up in Mrs Ramsay’s heart.

Love had a thousand shapes. There might be lovers whose gift it was to choose out the elements of things and place them together and so, giving them a wholeness not theirs in life, make of some scene, or meeting of people (all now gone and separate), one of those globed compacted things over which thought lingers, and love plays.

there forced themselves upon her other things, her own inadequacy, her insignificance, keeping house for her father off the Brompton Road, and had much ado to control her impulse to fling herself (thank Heaven she had always resisted so far) at Mrs Ramsay’s knee and say to her—but what could one say to her? “I’m in love with you?” No, that was not true. “I’m in love with this all,” waving her hand at the hedge, at the house, at the children. It was absurd, it was impossible 

(fun fact: the spanish translation adds something that i’d translate as “one could not say what one meant / what one wanted to say”, which i really like and i was disapointed to find out isnt on the english edition)

It was love, she thought, pretending to move her canvas, distilled and filtered; love that never attempted to clutch its object; but, like the love which mathematicians bear their symbols, or poets their phrases, was meant to be spread over the world and become part of the human gain. So it was indeed. The world by all means should have shared it  

from the great gatsby

I didn’t want to go to the city. I wasn’t worth a decent stroke of work but it was more than that—I didn’t want to leave Gatsby. I missed that train, and then another, before I could get myself away (…) Just before I reached the hedge I remembered something and turned around. ‘They’re a rotten crowd,’ I shouted across the lawn. ‘You’re worth the whole damn bunch put together.’ I’ve always been glad I said that. It was the only compliment I ever gave him

from kafka’s diaries

may 27 1911: Today is your birthday, but I am not even sending you the usual book, for it would be only pretence; at bottom I am after all not in position to give you a book. I am writing only because it is so necessary for me today to be near you for a moment

parts from a from a letter he wrote to oskar pollak on february 4 1902

When we talk together the words are hard; we tread over them as if they were rough pavement. The most delicate things acquire awkward feet and we can’t help it. We’re almost in each other’s way; I bump into you and you - I don’t dare and you. When we come to things that are not exactly cobblestones or the Kunstwart, we suddenly see that we are in masquerade, acting with angular faces (especially me, I admit), and then we become sad and bored. Does anyone make you as bored as I do?

then I fall silent and you fall silent and you become bored, and I become bored and it’s all like a stupid hangover and there’s no use lifting a hand. But neither wants to say this to the other, out of shame or fear or - You see, we are afraid of each other, or I am.

Of course I understand it. It’s boring to stand for years in front of an ugly wall and it just won’t crumble away. Of course, but the wall is afraid for itself, fro the garden (if there is one), and you get out of sorts, yawn, have headaches, don’t know where to turn

You often talk with her, not only for the sake of talking. You walk around with her somewhere here or there, or in Roztok, and i sit at my desk at home. You talk with her, and in the middle of a sentence somebody jumps up and makes a bow. That is me with my untrimmed words and angular faces. That lasts only a moment, and then you go on talking. I sit at my desk at home and yawn. I’ve been trhough it already. Wouldn’t that separate us? Is that so strange? Are we enemies? I am very fond of you

from his leters to milena

Last night I dreamed about you. What happened in detail I can hardly remember, all I know is that we kept merging into one another. I was you, you were me. Finally you somehow caught fire.

jane wong. from clearing

We want to believe everything has meaning.Plums blossom over a power grid

and I am in love again. The shame of it.

from leslie harrison’s [sirens]

I’m not Penelope married to faith married to waitingbound in fine soft strands of silk dyed and stretchedin my world longing has teeth and fins has a tastefor blood longing is a room built entirely of knives

Lorde’s melodrama tour interlude

Don’t you wish you could go inside a heart, see the strings and atrium’s, everything beating and bleeding. It’s kind of funny, I spend almost every minute thinking about love. Being guided, and divided by love. But I’ve never seen it. It’s just a rumour, a comedown, an afterglow. I wanna see it, in colour. In the summer, I can almost picture it

from Andrea Long Chu’s on liking women

One day, you tell yourself, it will give you what you want. Then, one day, it doesn’t. Now it dawns on you that your object will probably never give you what you want. But this is not what’s disappointing, not really. What’s disappointing is what happens next: nothing. You keep your object. You continue to follow it around, stash it in a drawer, water it, tweet at it. It still doesn’t give you what you want—but you knew that. You have had another realization: not getting what you want has very little to do with wanting it. Knowing better usually doesn’t make it better. You don’t want something because wanting it will lead to getting it. You want it because you want it

ada limón, In a Mexican Restaurant I Recall How Much You Upset Me

But love is impossible and it goes ondespite the impossible. You’re the muscleI cut from the bone and still the boneremembers, still it wants (so much, it wants)the flesh back, the real thing,if only to rail against it, if onlyto argue and fight, if only to missa solve-able absence.

i dont think i need to get into mitski songs because you probably already know but basically pink in the night/come into the water/once more to see you/in happy when she says if you’re going take the train so i can hear it rumble one last rumble/in i want you from the first verse to the first time she goes “i just need a quiet place where i can scream how i love you” (YES the card thing is very important)/the first verse of i will (w emphasis on everything you feel is good i f you wold only let you)/abbey/strawberry blond

sufjan steven’s futile devices obviously predatory wasp of the palisades you know the drill 

was going to find some twin fantasy lyrics but i started thinking about famous prophets (minds) and like. emotionally left my body so. i wont be thinking about it or any other songs anymore it makes me too crazy

from frances ha

It’s that thing when you’re with someone and you love them and they know it and they love you and you know it but it’s a party and you’re both talking to other people and you’re laughing and shining and you look across the room and catch each other’s eyes. But not because you’re possessive, or it’s precisely sexual, but because that is your person in this life and it’s funny and sad but only because this life will end and it’s this secret world that exists right there. In public. Unnoticed. That no one else knows about. It’s sort of like how they say that other dimensions exist all around us but we don’t have the ability to perceive them. That’s what I want out of a relationship. Or just life, I guess.

from ellen lee’s notes on twin fantasy that i revisit constantly

there’s no going back to deliver these words to the ones they were really meant for. That’s how heartbreak feels, I guess. It feels like your heart in between the teeth of someone who’s looking away. When you’ve lost your loved object, what happens to all the things you have to say to them? When they’re turned away, what happens to all the things that you couldn’t, but desperately need(ed) to, say to their face? He dissociates himself from his own romance until it becomes a fantasy. You have your bleeding heart, you have a finite set of memories — when nothing new enters and you’re unwilling to let go, then you have a fantasy. The loved object enters into you and transforms.

the journey home by dermot bolger(havent read this at all dont really plan to/dont know a thing about it either i just came across this shit like 2 years ago and i still think about it)

I wanted to hurt him; I wanted just to touch him. What I wanted I’m not really sure. If he had stopped and opened his arms I would have walked towards him; I would have sat on the kerb all night with him

adam b, sweet i have a (really gay) heart

i feel like my body is the extension of a lake. i feel really badabout not telling you the truth, sometimes. i feelreally small next to you. tall boys remind me of bean stalks.i wish i had your legs. i wish i could know your handsbefore i even touch them

aaaand i think that’s all i could think of and track down, hope this is actually helpful and not too long (i am indecisive no kidding). also ksjdfg it’s nice that you thought to ask me this and i did have fun going over all these quotes so thank you 💖💖💖

[mikeconphoto]

"FIT FEATURE: ALEX PAINE" - BY MIKECON PHOTOGRAPHY

First and foremost, I want to thank you all for reading this blog. I’m writing this one primarily because it’s been a long time coming since this came out. This blog is actually supposed to be in a magazine. I won’t say which one however, the magazine did say years ago that they’d use the images, but then when they had a change of staff, they then changed their tune and stated that they made no written promise that they’d publish the photos of Alex. Thus, was my reason for making my own, “Fit Feature(s)” on my own website for the world to see. I added more images from other shoots inside of the blog just to make up for lost time. Our initial shoot that was on 14 November 2016, so almost 4 years later, I’m going to post this. Alex has since updated the information on all of her accomplishments, so sit back and take a ride with me.

HERE WE GO! …Oh man, there’s a lot to say about this amazing athlete. Alex Paine is something awesome. I literally have met only a handful of people that are energetic and fun to work with in my career. No matter how many times I’ve worked with Alex, she has always brought me her best. On 17 May 2017, I received an email from her Mother Rhonda that read, “Thank you so much for helping my daughter, Alex, with her dream.” To me that was awesome because not a lot of parents take interest, or support their children’s dreams when they’re older. I’m always proud of Alex, and I’ll always support her because she’s just awesome people! Once you get to know her, you will know exactly why she’s awesome!

Describe your life before you started training.

Before I started training, health was never really anything that crossed my mind. I was not active, although a played a few sports in school, and I never cared about diet. I was fortunate enough when I was younger to have parents that understood the importance of diet and nutrition so I never had issues with weight until later in life. When I went to college I ate whatever I wanted and did not participate in any kind of active lifestyle. I quickly began putting on weight and indulging in a very unhealthy lifestyle. 

How different do you feel now compared to then?

I feel stronger, more confident, and empowered by my accomplishments. I am a happier and healthier person because of the hard work and dedication that I have put into myself.  By pushing the boundaries of my physical limits through training I have not only become a more successful athlete but these traits have crossed over into other aspects of my life and I have found that I work harder on my education and relationships. It is amazing how when one aspect of your life is in order the rest of it seems to fall into place. Be happy, be healthy!

Was there is pivotal moment that motivated you to start training? If so, what was it?

I was a junior in college when I started noticing that my life decisions had led to quite a bit of weight gain and I realized I was no longer happy with how I looked or how I felt. I knew that something needed to change. I was not active, I did not eat well, and I was starting to become very unhappy with my physical appearance. Although all of these were large factors the biggest turning point was when I went on a hiking trip with my friends. I have always loved the outdoors and hiking has always been a passion of mine; however, this time was different. I found myself struggling to keep up with my friends and feeling completely unprepared for the trip. I had stopped taking care of myself and because of this I was no longer able to do the things I loved and I knew then that I needed to make a change.

Do you remember your first training session? How different is your training today?

My first training sessions were all about cardio. I would spend hours everyday on the elliptical doing steady state cardio while I read or studied for exams. I figured as long as I was moving I was burning calories and that was all that mattered for losing the weight. This worked slowly but I realized I was not getting the results I wanted. I changed from cardio to doing some popular workout videos that incorporated lightweight training mixed with HIIT cardio and I started noticing that not only was I losing weight but I was also getting stronger. This is when I got addicted to weight training and strength development. I stopped doing cardio and focused on weight training, on lifting heavy, and just getting stronger. After two years of heavyweight training I decided that I wanted to compete in a bodybuilding show. Today my focus is on competing so I train differently. I still primarily weight train but focus more on certain body parts and concentrate on symmetry when deciding what and how to train. 

What has been the most rewarding aspect of training for you? Why?

Seeing results! These may have been slow and gradual at times but when I take the time to look back and see how far I have come, the reward that I feel makes everything I have done to reach my fitness goals worth it.  I am always growing, always changing, and always reaching new goals. Fitness is progress and this progress is what makes this lifestyle so rewarding. 

What has continued to motivate you throughout your training? Why?

The fitness community associated with Musclemania and Fitness Universe have been a huge part of what has motivated me throughout my training. There are many different organizations out there and every competitor must find the one that fits them best. For me that has been Fitness Universe. The support they give their athletes is completely remarkable. They promote their athletes on social media and on their websites and are always checking in on their athlete’s progress. The production of their shows is also above and beyond that of any organization that I have ever seen. Each athlete gets his or her moment in the spotlight on the stage and each person is made to feel like a star. The community of athletes is like no other, I have made many lifetime friends in this organization – from competitors to promoters – and would not be were I am today in this industry if it was not for their support! 

What are your qualifications - why did you set out to achieve these?

I attended Buena Vista University for my undergraduate degree from which I graduated summa cum ladde with a bachelor in biology. Currently, I am a full time graduate student conducting research on science education at the University of Colorado-Boulder. I have already earned her Masters in Molecular, Cellular, ad Developmental biology, studying Fat metabolism and Glucose homeostasis in Type II diabetes. I am currently pursuing my PhD in the same field studying Scientific Teaching. 

Teaching is my passion. Whether that is fitness or science, I love it all. In the future I aim to become a teaching professor at a university where I can inspire and prepare young adults for careers in science.

In my free time I work as a personal trainer, posing coach, and I even run my own business - Xela’s Customs, for which I design and competition suits and theme wear. I make my own theme wear, bikinis, and have even been the sponsored suit provider for multiple local Musclemania shows. Recently I have expanded this business to be more encompassing to better serve my clients by adding hair, makeup, and tanning packages for athletes.

What have you had to overcome to get to where you are today? Did that change you in any way? If so, describe how.

One struggle that I have had to overcome is one that is actually quiet common among people in the bodybuilding/fitness industry, which is body dysmorphia.  This is a disorder in which people constantly think about and obsess over their real or perceived flaws. The reason this is so common for those who focus a lot of effort into competing is because we are trained to analyse our bodies for symmetry, fat percentage, as well as muscle size and shape. This can be overwhelming and start to consume you. Body dysmorphia is something that consumed me after my first show and is something that I have and continue to struggle with on a daily basis. I work every day to not focus on my flaws and I consistently work towards reflecting on the positive aspects of myself. I push myself to promote my own self-love. It is important for competitors and everyone alike to be realistic and honest with themselves, not to put pressure on being perfect, and to love themselves and be proud of all the hard work they are putting into their health and fitness. 

What is the number one lesson you have learned about health and fitness through your training?

Nutritional decisions are the number one component of fitness that will give you results; whether this is weight loss or muscular development, nutrition is key.  Finding a nutritional portfolio that fits both your body type and goals is probably one of the hardest parts of fitness but once you have found what works it is easy to live a healthy lifestyle that promotes working towards your fitness goals. 

What do you wish you had known when you were 16?

You only have one body so take care of it and don’t be afraid to chase your dreams!

Describe how training makes you feel.

I love training and spending time in the gym; the gym is truly my happy place. I can escape from everything when I train and just focus on the reps. Its freeing and invigorating all at the same time. There is no feeling like training hard in the gym. The release of endorphins I get when I train and escape from the world that I feel really makes training my favorite part of the day. 

Do you have a quote that you live by? If so, why this one?

“Everything you ever wanted is on the other side of fear.” Fear of failure is what prevents many of us from chasing our dreams. You may have to face your fears in order to accomplish the things that mean the most to you, but once you have the reward is worth every part of your struggle. So face your fears head on and take control of your future!

What was your reason for taking health and fitness to the level you have? Why is it so important to you?

Competing is fun, but honestly my favorite part of fitness is helping others. I love being a motivator and helping others see their potential when it comes to fitness, I want to motivate and encourage, specifically women, to push the boundaries of what they believe their bodies are capable of.  I want to be a role model to women. I want to motivate and encourage girls too see that being strong is amazing, that living a healthy lifestyle is rewarding, and seeing your body change is worth more than anything you can buy.

What advice would you give to women wanting to get into the best shape of their life?

Think about the other 23 hours in your day. Its’ not the 1 hour in the gym that will get you fit, it is the other 23 hours of the day. In other words, going to the gym is great for your health but if you neglect to provide your body with the correct nutrients, neglect to provide your body with the rest it needs, or give your body substances that are harmful in this time, you will not see the progress that you are working for in that hour at the gym. 

What is the most important thing women need to remember when training? Why?

Progress is slow; it does not and will not happen overnight. You have to stay persistent and consistent in your training and nutrition if you want to see results. 

Fitness is not a crash diet or a few weeks of weight training in the gym; fitness is a lifestyle. Fitness is a journey of self -discovery and change. 

We all have days where motivation is low – how do you overcome these? Have you always been able to do this?

When my motivation is low I reflect on my goals. I think about what I want now in comparison to what I want most and then make a decision about what I can do today to get me one step closer to that goal. By having a goal and reflecting on that goal you keep yourself accountable as well as provide yourself with the perspective you need to keep moving toward that goal.  

What would you like to see change in the health and fitness industry?

Honesty. This is especially important for women. When women see pictures of competitors, models, and girls on their favorite magazines they think “I want to look like that!” and in many cases what these girls look in these images is neither healthy nor maintainable. As a competitor I play with my foods, water, and even salt intake to look the way I do on show day and by the next day I will look completely different. Unfortunately, this information is not what is shared with these images, instead slogans like “lose 5 pounds in 10 days” or “get abs like these” are featured next to these women giving those reading these messages the hope to someday look like the model on the magazine.  By bringing in honesty about what that model had to do to look like that or even just producing images of women who live a healthy and maintainable lifestyle, women will have a better understanding and more realistic goals of the body that fitness can give them.

What would a perfect Sunday involve for you?

Sunday is my rest day. I love spending my Sunday’s with family and of course my two little dogs. Sleeping in is a must, followed by a small brunch and a day at the dog park with my pups. 

Contest history - Do you have a highlight? Why?

Musclemania Colorado Natural Tour 

Ms. Bikini Mile High 2015

Mile High Model Champion 2015

Top 5 Finalist at Ms. Bikini Colorado 2015

Top 5 Finalist at Ms. Fitness Colorado 2015

Colorado Model Champion 2016

First Runner-up Ms. Bikini Colorado 2016

Colorado Model Champion 2017

Overall Colorado Bikini (Pro Card Earned) 2017

Colorado Model Champion 2019

First Runner-up Rocky Mountain Figure 2019 

First Runner-up Rocky Mountain Women’s Physique 2019

Colorado Figure Champion 2019

First Runner-up Colorado Championship Women’s Physique 2019

Fitness America Weekend 

Top 25 Finalist at Ms. Bikini America 2015

Top 10 Model America 2016

FirstRunner-up Ms. Bikini America 2016

First-Runner up Commercial Model America 2017

Top 10 Ms. Bikini Professional America 2017

First Runner-up Figure America 2019

Top 5 Women’s Physique America 2019

Top 5 Sports Model America 2019

Top 10 Ms. Bikini Professional America 2019

Diet

I eat 5 to 6 small-portioned meals throughout the day that are high in proteins and healthy fats and lower in carbs.  I always stick to clean and whole foods. Some of my favorite clean proteins are chicken and tilapia and my favorite healthy fats come from nuts and avocados. Detailed information about my nutrition is copyrighted by my trainer and coach Allen (Watty) Watkins from Team Tried and True.

I highly recommend spending the time and money to find and hire a coach as they provide a scientific approach to weight loss and muscular development. I know some people do not always want to spend the money on this aspect of fitness but you have to look at it from the point of view of your health. You are spending money on your health, your well being, your confidence. You are only given one body and, in my opinion, there is no amount of money that would prevent me from taking care of my body. 

Workout week

Monday – Legs (hamstring focus) 

Tuesday  - Shoulders and Triceps

Wednesday – Back and Biceps 

Thursday – Legs (Quad focus)

Friday – Back and Arms

Saturday – Shoulders and Abs

Sunday -  Rest day

QUICK QUESTIONS:

What is your favorite food to indulge on? How often do you treat yourself?

Halo top Ice cream is by far my favorite indulgence. Its low calorie ice cream that is high in protein, low and carbs, and best of all, tastes like real ice cream! 

What is your best beauty secret?

As a makeup artist, I can not stress enough the importance of taking a break from makeup – I try to only wear coverage products, like foundations, when I absolutely have to, otherwise I just put on some light moisturizer with SPF and call it a day. This keeps my skin clear and breakouts to the minimum. 

Who inspires you? Why? 

Without the help of my parents and my boyfriend I do not know if I would be where I am today. Both of my parents were active bodybuilders when I was younger and have maintained a healthy lifestyle to this day. Having them there for me to push me to live a life of fitness and always being there to help me along the way has been truly amazing. My friends have been supportive as well. They are always there for me when I need help with my diet, workouts, cardio routine, or when I just need someone to listen. My coach, Allen Watkins of Team Tried and True has also been a huge inspiration for me. He has pushed me to be the best athlete I can be through intense training regiments and science based nutrition. Without him I would not be the accomplished athlete that I am today.  My friends, family, and supporters have all inspired me every day to get up, to push myself to the limit, and to become the best me I can be.

Who is your fitness and body role model? Why?

Jen Heward - Youtube Personality

This woman is inspirational! She is open and honest about the fitness lifestyle, loves herself and encourages all women to do the same, and motivates women to simply be the best they can be. Her positive attitude and outlook on life puts a smile on my face and always leaves me feeling like “I can do this.”

Dana Linn Bailey and Dani Scho - IFBB Women’s Physique 

These ladies are the original women of what is now known as women’s physique. Their hard work and dedication to the sport is what inspired me to start bodybuilding in the first place and they have been the real driver for my transition into Figure and Women’s Physique. 

What do you have in store for the future? What do you want to improve on?

Fitness related: I want to train harder and put on more size and muscle before my next competition. I also want to become more involved in the Musclemania/Fitness Universe organization. I currently help to organize and produce the local shows in the Colorado area and I hope to continue to pursue this passion for both the local shows in the 2020 season. I am also working on growing my bikini/theme wear business to provide competitors with unique customized suits that simply make them feel like stars on stage. Finally, I am working on becoming a certified personal trainer so that I can help other women reach their fitness goals and find the same happiness that I have found through fitness.

I'm currently preparing for:

Currently I am in my off-season training for my next Fitness Universe competition – either at Fitness Universe Weekend in Miami or Fitness America Weekend in Las Vegas. My goal for the 2020 season is to acquire another pro-card in the Fitness Universe organization as a Figure Pro. 

Website and/or social media: 

Xelas Customs Bikinis Facebook: Paine4Gains Fitness and Xela’s Customs Instagram:@paine4gains and @xelas_customs

[nightowlfandom]

MY PROMPT LIST IS RIGHT HERE! Requests are OPENED!

Also If no one has told you today, DAMN YOU LOOK CUTE TODAY. FUCK YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL! *flips a table* In all seriousness, it's normal to be insecure but please don't let that hinder you from anything. Just because someone calls you ugly doesn't make them prettier or correct. I myself struggle with insecurities and while eats us alive , theres always someone who thinks you look the best you've ever looked. 😊

3- "Damnit do you have any idea how amazing you are! Stop being so insecure!"

4- "Don't argue with me on this!"

13- "I dare you to finish that sentence.'

38- "I'd never thought I'd see the day you actually take my advice"

43- "You're so quiet, is something wrong?"

...

"No" you sighed for what felt like the tenth time in 20 minutes. You stood in front of a mirror, staring. "What does he see in me anyways?"

The one time you decide that maybe wearing jeans and a way too big sweater wasn't gonna cut it today was when Jin decided to clean every mirror in the house. You touched your nose and lips. You stared at your eyebrows, glared at the way your body moved when you turned. Your body wasn't even the problem, or maybe it was. You didn't know any more.

Guess its pajamas again today, because no way in hell were you gonna wear shorts.

...

"You're so quiet, is something wrong?" Jin looked up from his phone. You always laughed at his joke, especially the one where he said "Yoongi? No MEngi" (I just made that up and I hate myself.)

You shook your head. "No, I'm fine."

"You most definitely are not fine, you always sigh before you lie." he noted. "You know you can talk to me, right?"

"I said I'm fine, Jin." your voice wavered as your eyebrows arched.

"Y/N-"

"Just leave it alone okay?!" You snapped, standing to your feet. You began to walk away but Jin grabbed your hand and whirled you around.

"I won't leave it alone! You're upset! Why on Earth would I-" he began. You decided to just say it. What was the worst that could come of it.

"Why me?" you asked lowly. Receiving an adorable look of confusion from Jin, you continued. "Why me? Why did you choose me? Why are you attracted to me?" you asked.

"What?!" Jin looked taken aback. "Where is this coming from?!"

"Everyone says it! How did Y/N land a guy like Jin. Jin is to handsome for Y/N! Y/N needs to step her game up before someone takes Seokjin from her." you quoted everything you've ever overheard from every negative person you've had interactions with. "Y/N is too Ug-"

"I dare you to finish that sentence." Jin narrowed his brows. "Don't you dare say it. You know how I feel about you saying that about yourse-."

"UGLY!" You yelled, on the brink of falling to the floor. "Why can't I say it, Jin? Look at me, then look at you." you took in a choking breath.

No Y/N, don't cry. No tears at a time like this!

"Why is what someone else says so important to you?!" he looked mad. Seokjin wasn't angry at you, he was angry at the fact that you couldn't see how beautiful you were. He was mad at the other irrelevant lowlifes who tore you down. "Y/N, I didn't get into a relationship with you because of pity or something stupid that someone else told you."

"Then why? What's so special or 'beautiful' about me?" you asked.

"The minute I saw you curse out Jungkook for bumping into you when you fell, not knowing who he was and not caring even after he told you. I knew you were genuine..."

You remembered that day, water spilled all over you. Even after Jungkook took off his mask revealing his face you said "Okay singer boy, is that supposed to excuse the fact that YOU CRASHED INTO ME!?"

"And then I got to know you Y/N. Your likes, dislikes, passions, everything. Then I realized that you make me happy just by smiling in my direction. Damnit!" he snapped. "Do you have any idea how amazing you are." Jin suddenly pulled you into a hug. "Stop being so damn insecure. After today, don't argue with me on this any more." he sighed. "You're perfect okay?"

Good thing you didn't cry. You did however, look down at your feet.

"If you don't believe you're beautiful, I'll just have to make you believe it." Jin grabbed your hand and led you to the bedroom, to your endless confusion.

You were sat on the edge of the bed, Jin standing in front of you. How in the world was he going to make you 'believe' anything.

"Seokjin what are you-"

"Shhh." Jin gently pushed you on your back. "You don't need to do anything but lay back, princess."

Hehe, the last time Jin called you Princess, he was about to...wait a minute.

"Jin?" you leaned up on your hands. You felt your pants being yanked down from your legs, panties following in pursuit. He seemed focused on something, like he was on a mission. Seokjin hooked his arms around your legs and pulled you closer, until you felt warm breath hovering over your lower half.

"J-jin?" you gulped loudly. A finger glided up your slit, causing you to gasp. "Jin-ah!" you cut your self off as he tickled you with the pads of his fingers.

Fucking hell you looked so...so shit, what could he say. Think Jin! Think!

Instead of opening his mouth to speak, Jin lowered his head again. He wasn't gonna say anything, at least not now.

Jin (quite noisily) sucked at yout clit, not showing any mercy as he lashed against you with his tongue. Jin held your thighs, diving deeper into you.

Fuzz and more fuzz clouded your thoughts. Moans, where they even moans?! It sounded like your voice would crack every ten seconds.

Heat rushed to you face, hearing him moan into you, feeling him push his tongue into your wetness. You felt him smirk and heard the low rumble of his laugh as you rested your leg on his shoulder.

"S-seok-kjin." you whimpered. "I- uh I."

"Cum for me beautiful." he growled, now inserting his long fingers into you.

Jin reveled in you squirming and trying to keep your voice low but failing. Your face formed into a glaring pout as Jin smiled cheekily at you, winking as he wiped your juices from his chin. "You're beautiful, you always have been. I'm gonna make you believe it every day if I have to."

...

"I never thought I'd see the day you actually take my advice." Jin walked up behind you. "Nice outfit." he winked. You felt a tap on your butt, making you poke Jin in the side.

You were going out to lunch with your friends. It was a girls day, which meant you really couldn't leave the house in ripped pajama bottoms, well, you could but you'd be going to a fancy lunch shopping, then dinner, gray pajamas with ducks on them weren't for this occasion. You weren't sure about your outfit, but it was something you always wanted to wear but were too afraid. When you asked Jin, his reply was "If you want to wear it, wear it with confidence."

"I'll be back later tonight." you assured as you slipped on your shoes.

"Mhm. Maybe I'll get to show you how perfect you are some more? Hm?" Jin wrapped his arm around you.

"Back off singer boy, I have to go." you laughed as his nose tickled your ear.

"Before you go..." Jin whipped out his phone and opened the front camera. "Smile."

Oh no, the dreaded camera. Your old enemy....'click'!

"And posted!" Jin declared. "Have fun honey."

You waved him goodbye. Jin secretly smirked at his phone which has gained over 1000 likes and was only increasing by the second.

"Woah, she's beautiful!"

"Omg, Jin needs to step up. Y/N looking like a goddess."

"OMG HER OUTFIT, I WANT IT!"

"Y/N's smile is so adorable!"

"JIN TELL US WHERE YOU FOUND Y/N, I NEED ONE!"

"Y/N and Jin are couples goals, haters can fuck off."

Seokjin smiled at the support he read. He also couldn't wait to rub it in your face when you got back.

[thedogsled]

Who Tube (Doctor Who YouTube) is hilariously terrible at the moment. You’ve got new fans being gatekept by old fans and then yelling at the old fans and then the old fans yelling back, people subtweeting each other on their channels “Some YouTubers, they know who they are”, people posting vicious rants as soon as episodes end--lots of really really toxic shit on both sides. Like. It’s hilarious--if you enjoy VERY thinly veiled misogyny on one side and blind adoration for progressiveness at the expense of decent writing on the other. If you listen to these people, it’s not very difficult to see where the canon schism between straight white “geek culture” males and anyone with a so labeled by said people SJW motivation come to blows. They both think the other side is just ignorant, and the constant lashing out is just. Wow. It’s really. Wow.

Saltiness ahead.

It frustrates me a lot, because I feel the show has been really hit and miss this season and the warring on YouTube is just another example of how you just can’t discuss this reasonably. It’s not all bad, but it’s certainly been far from all good. Some of it REALLY works, like for example Ryan’s dyspraxia and the decision to explore Yasmin’s character through her grandmother’s story, but some of it doesn’t. I was particularly dismayed today, spoilers, by James I being played through the lens of modern campness by Alan Cumming this week, turning the former monarch into a queer caricature (I know the guy most from his role in Spy Kids, Fegan Floop, which replays ENDLESSLY on british TV). I feel like a lot of the episodes of this season have been simply the characters thrown into chaos, bad guy is revealed to be an alien, then the Doctor gives a shockingly profound, emotional speech that makes you forget how awful some of the other parts were and you go away with ~feels~ and not much else, because all the endings are pulled out of the writer’s ass anyway. Just. That’s how I personally saltily feel about this show this season, like it’s been platforming for a bunch of different writers saying what they want to say about humanity through the Doctor’s mouth. Like she’s ceased to exist beyond her existence as that mouthpiece, and that in some ways the show has too. (just my opinion. anyway.)

But you can’t talk about this stuff. I find myself reading reviews and watching people who like the show and place no accountability on the show beyond being politically bold, and it drives me nuts. It doesn’t matter what form it comes in, so long as it’s pro-feminist, or it exposes people to history they might not have learned in class, or there’s a dude giving birth for 50% of the airtime. If I want to hear or discuss any challenge to those things, I find myself listening to purely negative reviews instead, and noping out when the person suddenly reveals halfway through that they believe that because men aged 18-40 is a big demographic, it only makes sense that they’re the group that are kowtowed to at every opportunity. Like wtf dudes, sorry you can’t hack that other people exist in the world and you aren’t being catered to 24/7 any more. Fuck off. So it’s no wonder the antis feel Doctor Who lovers are all SJWs and the pos!Who people are convinced that the antis are all racist misogynist fucks. (The showrunners do too afaik, and that isn’t helped at all by Chibnall and Jodie both being SO resistant to negativity that neither of them seem to be soliciting fan feedback that isn’t positive.) Is it hard to ask for objectivity, though? For something that comes down the middle? That isn’t racist and misogynistic, but maybe still cares about how the things we’re looking for in terms of representation are being handed to us? How about, at least, not having to listen to some people who are so entitled that they literally think that Jodie Whitaker shouldn’t have shot out any babies so that she can instead devote her entire life to making TV shows? (Seriously, I listened to one girl who thought that, and you could hear her contempt for people who have kids in every syllable.)

I’ve liked episodes of this season. The Kablam! episode was great, I only had minor complaints with the ep that I handwaved away because I felt like there was actually some dramatic tension. I liked episode 2 because it was idk. A fun adventurous romp and the characters all had flaws. I quite liked Rosa because it had the bones of something better, and that showed through in all the scenes where Rosa’s actress (Vinette Robinson, who was also in the Chibnall episode ‘42′, btw what nepotism how many british actors do you think there are?) interacted with the other characters. 

But they weren’t all perfect, at least to me. Maybe I’m a negative nelly, because everyone seems to be tripping over themselves to scream positivity about the show in their reviews, but I, personally, feel like much of it has fallen flat. When they did finally drop - as they’ve been avoiding for much of this season - the ‘If I was a bloke this wouldn’t have been a problem’ thing, it wasn’t even delivered with a great deal of gravity or purpose. Maybe some people think that was a good thing, I don’t know, but looking at the way sexism was handled in Timeless, for example, and hell, Sliders (which was a trashy 90s show about jumping between alternate realities; or Quantum Leap for that matter, which had Sam jump into the lives of women in the past and experience days in their lifetimes), it’s way past the era of TV to deliver that kind of line like it’s inconsequentially drawing attention to something nobody noticed before, you know? Why is the BBC always 100 years behind, despite playing like it’s the most progressive thing ever? Why do we let it, and say “Sure we’ll take it, that’s enough” instead of also insisting they tell GOOD stories, and not wave their hand and say aliens did it at the end of every episode? I get it’s a time traveling series but the aliens show up and then the doctor waves her magic wand and ~science~ and yes she quoted Arthur C Clarke but she can do that and be powerful and tell powerful stories that aren’t completely...halfhearted, and if you don’t have trumped up stupid bad guys you don’t have to have flimsy solutions for beating them at the end.

We SHOULD be seeing ourselves in the media we’re absorbing. I firmly believe that. I also think, though, that we’re entitled to be respected by that media as well, in that the stories we’re seeing that show US should be good stories. They shouldn’t be concentrating on making as many nods as possible to as many corners of culture as possible that it stops caring about the story it’s telling, because whatever politically correct points it scores will ensure people overlook its flaws. It’s disrespectul, and we shouldn’t allow it, because it means we’re nothing but a commodity, an unquestioning storyblind audience that just doesn’t care so long as our representation needs are getting catered to. That means we’ll keep getting more representation, but a lot of it will be shit, because no matter what we’ll throw up our hands and give it ten out of ten and rigorously defend it no matter what caricatures it throws in front of us.

We should demand better stories alongside our representation. Fandom is so powerful now that we’re being written for, because as a whole we aren’t objective. We engage in mass squeeing, we’re GREAT at giving positive feedback and high ratings like it’s our job to do it even if it’s undeserved (and arguably Who NEEDED that positive feedback this year) and best of all anyone who doesn’t agree can be written off as an angry white dude, or racist, or just ignorant. That’s good for ratings and good for clicks, and networks eat that stuff up because it makes them money. But that isn’t respect, and we shouldn’t be selling ourselves out for a bargain basement price.

That’s my last word on it for now. I’ll probably complain again next week, and I know I KNOW this isn’t a popular pov for people, but I’ve made my bed with that. For those of you who loved it, I’m glad for you. I’m mostly disappointed for myself. And I still think camp James I was fucking terrible but I already know people love him, so what do I know?

P.S. my tags are for my flist so they can blacklist properly, not to force my saltiness down the throats of other Who fans. You don’t have to agree with me. I just needed to vent.

[roxy-davenport]

My Future

Pairing: AU Endverse Dean x Reader

Word count:  2,737

Beta: The awesome @raspberrymama :D

A/N: This was written for @paigeinastory Paige’s Country Song Fic/Sentence Prompt Challenge with the prompts, “When She Calls Me Baby” by Jason Aldean and “I don’t know what it is but damn.” This was also written for @jessica-bones-winchester’s Dating Dean Writing Challenge with the prompt, being called sweetheart. As well as for @dancingalone21 Lau’s AU Funny Quote challenge with the prompt,“That was scary!” AU slightly with Future!Dean. Romance, smut vaguely referenced. Hella fluffy. These are snippets of moments between endverse Dean and the reader. This is told from Dean’s POV

Also on AO3

Some days it’s tough just gettin’ up

Throwin’ on these boots and makin’ that climb

Some days I’d rather be a no show

Lay low ‘fore I go out of my mind

When Balthazar first came to drag me out of the future, I fought him off fiercely. First of all, in my time he was dead. So I was quite confused how and why he was here. He said some bs about wanting to give me some happiness away from “heaven’s drama”. Of course I looked at him like he grew two heads. But can you blame me, really? I growled, spat at him, even shot him but in the end, I was so happy he did it. I owe my happiness to him. I surely would have died in that timeline either by the Croatoan virus or by how hard and cruel I had become.

Balthazar placed me back in my previous timeline before there was any talk of Sam being Lucifer’s vessel, back to the good old days, just me and Sam hunting like we used to. No more apocalypse, Lucifer Sam, no more virus, just simple cases. Of course, I remembered the other timeline but I had a chance now to change it, maybe even get out of the life.

Naturally it took a while to conform to the “real” world but Sam was very understanding. Balthazar explained that he rescued me from a different timeline. Sam took it in stride because I was his brother after all, timelines or not. Sam taught me how to act in the world again with civilization. I could tell he wanted to ask which timeline but he didn’t and I didn’t tell him. There was no sense in burdening Sam with the truth.

I got right back into hunting like riding a bike. I guess a hunter never forgets how to hunt. And through hunting I met Y/N. I never thought I’d love anyone. I never thought I could. Y/N thawed out my cold heart and reminded me what it felt like to feel.

I love calling girls sweetheart. That’s my MO in relationships and dating. Some girls liked baby but I liked that used for me. I’m baby, she’s sweetheart. On rough days, I would close my eyes and remember our first date, the first time I called her sweetheart. It was after a hunt actually. We ran to the motel to clean up and then went to a dinner together.

I was shaky and about to back out when Sam urged me to go and gave me the mother of all pep talks. I sat across from her, my leg shaking underneath the table. I offset my nervousness by being extra cocky. The second I sat down I felt butterflies in my stomach. My eyes were on her almost the entire time. Y/N wore a dress and I got to see her shapely legs. She looked amazing in that dress. I could tell she was nervous, too, because she was fidgeting with her sleeves. I could stare at her all day.

Clearing my throat and tearing my eyes away from her for a second to look down at my menu I said, “You look a lot better without-.”

Y/N cut me off and smirked stating, “So do you, handsome.” I blushed - actually blushed...  like a girl. How embarrassing.

“What can I get you two?” Y/N looked up and I saw her frown. I followed her eyes and looked up at the waitress. She was definitely my type, well before I met Y/N that is. My eyes quickly returned to Y/N. A cocky smile appeared on my face as I shook my head and very obviously looked Y/N up and down. I took in her blushed face and the way she bit her lip. I wanted to make sure she knew the waitress while attractive, had nothing on her.

“I’ll have an omelette.” Y/N replied.

Nodding Dean added, “Same with a beer...Sam Adams if you got it, if not then a Guinness will be fine.”

The waitress nodded and left. I saw out of the corner of my eye, a longing look from the waitress but my attention was on Y/N. It would always be on Y/N. No girl would ever satisfy me again. No more one night stands and that’s one of the reason why I was nervous to go on this date. But once on it, I couldn’t wait to claim Y/N as mine.

“So sweetheart how did you get started in hunting?”

“My father is Crowley.”

My eyes went wide as I spit out my water all over the table. Y/N giggled and offered me napkins.

“Never got that response before.”

Curiously and tentatively I probed Y/n, “What’s the usual response?”

“Really? You? Or just running away but not spilling water everywhere. That’s a new one.”

Y/N spoke again answering the unasked question.“I hunt because I refuse to be my father’s daughter.”

Her past, like mine, doesn’t define her. She isn’t her father, she’s my light in the darkness, my rock. She pulled me out of myself and showed me that I deserved to be happy.

That night we started with no lies. I told her how I got into the business, the timeline I came from, everything. By the time we finished eating, I felt like I had known her for years. I put my arm around her as we walked back to the car. I called her sweetheart every day since. I feel lucky to hold her hand and call her mine. Sam is grossed out by the massive amount of PDA but he’s happy I found someone I love.

But when she says baby

Oh don’t matter what comes

Ain’t goin’ nowhere

She runs her fingers through my hair

And saves me

Yeah that look in her eyes got me comin’ alive

And drivin’ me a good kind a crazy

When she says baby

Oh when she says baby

She’s still asleep. I always wake up early just to watch over her. She looks so peaceful. On days away from her, I get no sleep. I need to feel her body against mine. I need to hold her.

She stirs before her alarm clock goes off and she turns in my arms murmuring, “baby.” She nuzzles into my chest as i reach over and turn the alarm clock off. Slowly she lifts her head up and looks into my eyes.

I reach down and stroke her cheek. “I don’t know what it is, but damn. You had me at hello.” She laughs at the corny but true line. God, do I wish I could make her laugh all the time. Her face crinkles in the most adorable way and she has the cutest dimples.

I hug her close to me and kiss her forehead. Her fingers cart through my hair and I moan happy to have her hands on my body. I’m happy to have made it back to her again. I’ve had a bad hunt, deep cuts, a worried Sam and one hell of a fight to gank that mofo but here, I’m saved. Here, none of that matters, it’s only me and her. I can be the real me. I can tell her what really happened on the hunt and she takes it all away. She eats the pain and suffering and replaces it with love. She’s my own personal sin eater.  

I look down at her and see her eyes are filled with such love and a hint of mischief. When her lips find mine, she kisses me without abandon. I melt into the kiss and hold her tight against me. She knows what I need without me having to say it. She’s determined to remind me how much she loves me. Every touch, every word, every moan she releases from me reminds me that I am hers. Her tongue, her whole mouth is like magic. She has hardly any gag reflex and can take me inside her warm mouth all the way to my pubic hairs. She licks the underside of my cock and I’m already fighting not to cum. Even if I’m trying hard not to come, she’ll make me come in a matter of minutes.

She’s a goddess in the bedroom. She knows how to read my body and I know how to read hers. Whenever I have a bad hunt like today, she gives me free reign over her body. She lets me take her anyway, in any position, anywhere I want. Nothing is off limits. How can I resist that? How can I focus on the hunt with a proposal like that? Which is exactly the point.

I missed her soft skin, her delicious curves, the way her body responded to me. It all drew me in. I‘m a breast man. I like asses and she has an amazing one but breasts are infinitely more fun. I can play and fondle them to my heart's content and watch her writhe and moan under me, begging me to fuck her. I love teasing my sweetheart. And when she cums, it’s the most gorgeous look ever. She says my name over and over again along with the word baby almost reverently like I’m everything to her. And in truth, she’s everything to me. 

Every time I’m on a hunt or in a motel room, she’s on my mind.

Some nights I come home fightin’ mad

Feel like runnin’ my fist through the wall

Is it even worth what I’m fightin’ for anymore

Feelin’ torn, oh the hell with it all

I came home again, another bad hunt. She could’ve told me to stop, I was making quite the mess but she didn’t. She let me get out my rage. She started throwing things into the center of the room; a bunch of pillows, some papers, a lamp she always hated and a couple of knick knacks. She just let me tear things apart. She gets that sometimes I need to just destroy, vent, and scream, especially on hunts where Sam and I nearly die.

She took a pillow and held it up to her mouth screaming into it. I copied her screaming into mine over and over again. I felt better. She always makes me feel better. I offer to explain but she puts a finger on my lips.

“I don’t need to know, baby. The point is that it bothered you to the point of rage. Tell me one thing...is Sam okay?”

“Yeah he is.”

“Good, then let it all go, baby. Forget the hunt. You’re with me now and nothing else matters.”

I get lost in her embrace, her kiss and just submit to our desires. The trigger to let go is always the way she calls me baby. Some might think that’s ridiculous but if you heard how she said it, you’d understand.

But when she says baby

Oh don’t matter what comes

Ain’t goin’ nowhere

She runs her fingers through my hair

And saves me

Yeah that look in her eyes got me comin’ alive

And drivin’ me a good kind a crazy

When she says baby

Oh when she says baby

I had to go on a hunt with Sam. I really considered just getting out of the life, I was married for Chuck’s sake, but as much as I tried to deny it, hunting was in my blood. I would sit and eat breakfast with her and read the newspaper and see people in pain, suffering knowing what monster it was and that I could help. She understands. She knows I have to be the hero and she’s okay with it. This hunt goes without a hitch. Instead of calling her or facetiming, I just barrel out of the hunt like a bat out of hell. Sam is holding on for dear life while I make sharp turn after sharp turn till I get to my baby.

Everything gonna be alright

Just lay down by my side

Let me love you through this life

She’s a perfect shot of faith

When every bit of mine is gone

Somethin’ I can believe in

A best friend, a heaven sent

Love to lean on

When I get home, I find her looking at the wedding video. It was simple. Elegant with only close friends and fellow hunters there. Jody Mills helped document it. The camera work was on the shaky side but Jody caught all the quiet moments, all the moments I whispered to a nervous and happy Y/N about how much I loved her and how much I wished I could take off her wedding dress and make love to her right then and there. In fact, I made her cum with my tongue five minutes later in the woods. I watched myself and her on that video and remembered all over again why I loved her. We looked so young and idealistic then.

She looked like an angel in that dress. I looked amazing in that suit. I had to hand it to Crowley for letting me borrow his new tailor. No one questioned that the King of Hell was our officiant or that Y/N was his daughter. Everyone just accepted our happiness and left it at that. 

Y/N got up to a segment where me and Sam were talking about her. I didn’t know Jody was filming us at the time.  

“Hey congratulations, Dean. You found your soulmate. After everything, you deserve to be happy.”

Clapping Sam on the back I added, “Thanks Sammy, now we gotta find you a girl.” Sam smiled at me and nodded before giving me a bear hug.

When the hug ended, I took a deep breath out and confessed, “That was scary!”

Sam looked at me confused, “Scary? How so Dean?”

“Well she’s my everything and I don’t do chick-flick moments.”

“Or so you say.”

“Not helping Sam, anyway, It took me a week of staring at her. We stumbled into the same hunt and every hour we did research, my eyes went to her. God, was I creepy. Finally she helped me out and gave me her number. After the first hunt, we kept hunting together, flirted with each other and man did we have a bunch of sexual tension.”

“Had sex, finally. You waited for two months for it, remarkable really.”

Ignoring Sam’s comment Dean continued, “And then we just moved in together. We never talked about it, it just happened-”

Sam interjected, “Or she basically showed up with stuff and you beamed at her nodding.”

“Same thing.” Dean stated quickly.

“Anyway it was scary asking Y/N to marry me. I’ve been with other girls but never felt a connection like with her. She was my tether to this world, my reason, my life, my everything and so it took me days to get the courage up to ask her. Right after she killed a werewolf to save me, I just bent down on one knee and whipped open the ring box. I wanted it to be romantic but with the adrenaline pumping, my fear was gone, I didn’t trip over my own words they just spewed out. She cried and chanted yes and baby so many times. I really am the luckiest man in the world.”

“And I still am,” speaking loud enough for her to hear me over the noises from the TV.

She looked away from the tv and ran into my arms. “I have more good news to tell you Dean.”

“What’s that, sweetheart?”

She stepped back and put her hand on her belly. My eyes widened and she nodded. I cried, not able to stop myself. I finally had a family. It wasn’t just me and Sammy anymore. I had a life, a future. I had no idea what would come next or whether I would keep hunting now that Y/N was pregnant but I knew that whatever did happen, we’d do it together.

But when she says baby

Oh don’t matter what comes

Ain’t goin’ nowhere

She runs her fingers through my hair

And saves me

Yeah that look in her eyes got me comin’ alive

And drivin’ me a good kind a crazy

When she says baby

Oh when she says baby

Yeah that look in her eyes got me comin’ alive

And drivin’ me a good kind a crazy

Tagging

Forevers: @purgatoan, @killerofthesouth, @charliebradbury1104, @chaos-and-the-calm67, @chelsea072498, @everyday-supernatural-af, @kalliravenne, @toogardenenthusiast, @winchesterprincessbride, @one-shots-supernatural, @take-me-tonirvana, @hellsmother, @ellen-reincarnated1967, @faegal04, @deals-with-demons, @mamaredd123, @atc74, @hamartiamacguffin, @donnaintx

Dean Folks from my list: @buckysmetallicstump, @faith-in-dean, @bennyyh, @ruprecht0420 @supernatural-jackles, @jesspfly, @webcricket

@aprofoundbondwithdean, @thing-you-do-with-that-thing, @mrswhozeewhatsis, @dr-dean, @nichelle-my-belle, @leatherwhiskeycoffeeplaid, @thegreatficmaster, @salvachester, @blushingsamgirl, @bkwrm523, @whispersandwhiskerburn, @lipstickandwhiskey, @impala-dreamer, @samsgoddess, @frenchybell, @scorpiongirl1, @for-the-love-of-dean, @jelly-beans-and-gstrings, @fiveleaf, @deansleather, @curliesallovertheplace, @whywhydoyouwantmetosaymyname, @waywardjoy, @imadeangirl-butimsamcurious, @kayteonline, @supernatural-jackles, @idreamofhazel, @wevegotworktodo, @ilovedean-spn2 , @quiddy-writes, @wi-deangirl77, @deantbh, @mysaintsasinner, @chelsea-winchester, @sinceriouslyamellpadalecki, @fandommaniacx, @teamfreewillimagines, @deanwinchesterforpromqueen, @castieltrash1, @supernaturallyobsessed, @memariana91, @writingbeautifulmen, @captain-princess-rose, @plaidstiel-wormstache, @idreamofhazel, @revwinchester, @supermoonpanda, @ageekchiclife, @i-dont-know-how-to-write, @vintagevalentinexx, @ohwritever, @ruinedbydestiel, @winchester-writes, @mysupernaturalfics, @thinkwritexpress, @sammit-janet @bowtiesandapplepie, @itsemmyb, @ezauraemmaline, @matteson-crazed, @castielspahdehrah, @charliesbackbitches, @crzcorgi, @gryffindorable713, @deerlululucy, @walkingencyclopediaoffandom, @MrsJohnSmith, @manawhaat, @growleytria, @thegleegeneration, @samtomydeanwinchester, @sinceriouslyamellpadalecki, @i-never-said-a-pilot, @thewinchestielboys, @supermoonpanda, @sis-tafics, @amaranthinecastiel, @kittenofdoomage, @samanddeanwinchester67, @prettyxwickedxthings, @ferferelli @lilyoflothlorien, @myfand0msandm0re, @olitzisbae, @iridianuniverse, @the-morning-star-falls,  @shortandlongstories, @strange-inhumanity-blog, @ackleslaugh @noisilyyoungpuppy, @fangirling-instead-of-working, @eyes-of-a-disney-princess, @chrisatplay, @kayteonline, @spnsimpleman, @faith-in-dean, @gimmethepieandnoonegetshurt, @for-the-love-of-dean, @mamaimpala, @zanthiasplace, @sleep-silent-angel, @pada-ackles-reads, @thing-you-do-with-that-thing, @gadreelsforbiddenfruit, @trenchcoats-and-bees, @curliesallovertheplace, @jencharlan, @not-so-natural-spn, @skybinx-blog, @thebunkerismyhome, @feelmyroarrrr, @beachy2014, @fandom-book-nerd, @tia58, @sams-little-toy, @sunriserose1023, @saving-things-hunting-family, @winchesterswoonathon, @jotink78, @lucifer-in-leather,  @babypieandwhiskey, @howmanytuesdaysdidyouhave, @supernatural-jackles, @avasmommy224, @angelwingsandsupernaturalthings, @mysaintsasinner, @chelsea-winchester, @besslincoln-bruh, @wheresthekillswitch, @maraisabellegrey, @notnaturalanahi