#an easy way to say we won't treat you because you're just like that

[boneopera]

.

[inkskinned]

it's because the bear wouldn't kill me just for being a woman. the bear doesn't kill me for fun. the bear can be shouted at, and will leave me alone. the bear won't make a tiktok complaining about how i crossed to the other side of the path when i saw him coming. if a bear kills me, it's just being a bear: it cannot understand logic. it is not acting out of malice - just fear or hunger.

bell hooks once wrote about how porches might be the only outside space left for women - it is still the domain of the house while it is also outside-but-safe. when i am in the woods, i am in the bear's home, and he has a right to defend his property. outside spaces - anywhere at night, certain parks in the day - those are often implicitly "owned" by men. i cannot explain the feeling of knowing when you have entered a man's "territory." you walk into a place and just know you are in their space. you get a sick sense - you're in danger.

the other day a group of about 8 men were fooling around in the woods while i walked my dog. i had to go around, take the extra 3 miles just to avoid them. it's okay, i like walking. this wasn't even a #feminism moment. it was just a tuesday.

what a plain and easy question. only one of the situations is seen as a tragic accident. i would rather die and have a park bench erected in my honor rather than have my family questioned about why they let me, an adult, walk in the woods in the first place when i should really be at home in the kitchen.

i worked in retail and food service. i have had women say and do absolutely heinous and abusive things to me - not because i was a woman, but because i was there, and they were angry. the way men treated me when angry was different - it was because i was a woman. you can always feel the difference, how there's an undertone of i'd hurt you worse if i could get away with it. i keep seeing people try to cite stupid statistics. why is there always a strange rage whenever women agree on things? like men can argue their way out of our lived experiences? it isn't a buzzfeed quiz - which of these traumas are you? 10 super cute ways not to fear strange men.

i have actually (thrice!) seen a bear in the wild, by the way. i died each time, obviously, and am a ghost writing to you. (it was scary but completely and utterly fine). the second encounter was a black bear with her cub. she looked at me like - do we have to do this or are we good? my dog was busy sniffing a bush, completely nonreactive. i felt like i was in a sitcom: feminist poet reacts - does she actually mean she'd choose the bear? my only thought was - she's so beautiful. her paws are massive.

and there's a part of me that feels the rage spinning out in a corner. why do we have to come up with quippy little comments in order to teach men empathy. would you rather die in a car accident or due to a mugging? and would you rather your house burn down due to an electrical fire or due to arson? gee willikers - it's almost like we're human people, and want to risk the accident versus the intention.

i would rather my last thought be oh shit, a bear rather than i'm a person too. why doesn't that matter? why don't you care?

[spider-stark]

SWORN RIVALS

Benjicot Blackwood x Bracken!Reader

Summary - Taking up sparring with your sworn rival is likely never a good idea.

Warnings - barely edited, blood, implied fighting, suggestive language but no real smut, likely ooc given that the episode hasn't even aired yet lmao

Word Count - 1.1k

!MINORS DNI!

// masterlist // send me your thoughts // comments & reblogs appreciated! //

Pain splinters throughout your hand as your knuckles collide with his jaw. He stumbles backwards—just barely managing to keep himself from falling right onto his ass. 

“You fight like a girl,” you jeer, purposefully antagonizing him. “Though I suppose that’s to be expected of a Blackwood.” 

A raspy laugh rumbles through Benjicot Blackwood’s chest—a bitter, deep sound that sets your toes curling. 

“You’ve got quite a mouth on you.” Forcing his chin high, he flashes his crimson-stained teeth in a wry grin, blood dribbling from the corner of his mouth. He muses, “But perhaps we should put it to better use, don’t you think?” 

You cut your eyes at the bawdy implication. “You’re disgusting, Ben.” 

Another chuckle as he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, inadvertently smearing blood along his bottom lip. The sight is entrancing—in a morbid sort of way. It glistens like pomegranate juice and, for a mere breath, you wonder if it would taste half as sweet. 

“C’mon!” Ben’s teasing tone slices through your thoughts, forcing some sense back into you. “Don’t act like you’ve never thought of it before,” he says, waving a hand between you both, “the two of us–” 

You don’t let him finish his sentence, cutting him off with a sharp glare. “I haven’t,” you practically snarl, taking a half-step towards him. “And you shouldn’t either,” you add, “I’d much prefer to be left out of your…" you blow out an exasperated breath, "depraved fantasies!” 

“Oh, but you are my depraved fantasies, sweetheart.” Ben’s grin widens as you groan, shaking your head at him. “You're also a liar, Bracken,” he adds, “and a shitty one, at that!” 

“You can believe whatever you want, Blackwood—but that won't make it true.” 

“Just admit it,” he continues. Swinging one foot forward, he takes a lazy step towards you—then another. “That’s why you train with me, isn’t it? ‘Cause you’re so desperate for someone to put you in your place—and none of those pansies along the Red Fork are fit for the task, are they?” 

You grit your teeth, knowing that his words aren’t entirely false. 

Training with Ben hadn’t necessarily been a purposeful decision. It was something that just sort of happened. Yet, in spite of the rivalry between your families, you’re willing to admit that you do prefer training with him over the Tully or Roote boys. 

He fought you like a true opponent—unlike the others, who felt the need to pull their punches or slow their own strikes, forever treating you like a helpless maiden rather than an equal. 

In many ways, you found Ben to be more tolerable than any other boy in the Riverlands, anyway. He was fierce and tough and undeniably skilled with both blade and fists, making him your ideal sparring partner. 

You still despise him, though—if only because that is what’s expected of you by your father, the Head of House Bracken. 

“Big talk from the boy who hasn’t gotten a single hit in today,” you smugly remind him. “Perhaps if you spent as much time training as you do thinking with your cock, you might actually stand a chance at victory, Benji.” 

Less than a foot-or-so of space separates the two of you when he finally stops, his grin souring like rotted fruit. 

“Don’t call me that,” he chides, his bottom lip jutting slightly. Your brow furrows, trying to discern if he’s pouting or if it’s simply swelling from when you hit him. “Besides,” Ben continues, “have you ever considered that maybe I’m just going easy on you?” 

You don’t buy his weak attempt at goading you—though you do entertain it, asking, “And why would you do that?” 

His shoulder lifts into a languid shrug. “Maybe I like it when you push me around,” he drawls, teasing. 

Another step and he’s towering over you, his chest mere inches from yours. His scent—a blend of leather and rich sandalwood—floods your nostrils, stirring your senses and leaving you dizzy. 

“Although,” Ben’s smirk returns, laden with his usual mischief, “I think I’d like you even more if you were on your knees-” 

A scoff rips from your throat, cutting him off with a rough swat to his chest. “Oh, go fuck yourself, Blackwood!” 

“Only if you’ll watch, Bracken,” he croons, mocking you. 

Every inch of your body is suddenly humming to life, an unrelenting blaze of rage—or was it desire?—setting your nerves alight. Before you can muster a response, a comeback, his fingers have closed around one of your wrists. 

“Go on,” Ben murmurs, his voice tantalizingly low. Your breath hitches as he presses your hand to his chest, feeling his pulse beat beneath your palm. “Hit me,” he dares, louder now. “Push me.” 

You don’t speak—don’t move, as those storm-cloud eyes dip once again. “Fucking do it—” 

You cut him off, fingers curling around the scarlet fabric of his tunic—you should kill him for being so crude, for acting so utterly lascivious! 

And yet, despite all logic and reason, you tug him closer. Pulling him down to your level in one swift motion, crashing your lips together in a kiss that is anything but soft. 

On instinct, your other hand slips to the back of his neck, tangling your fingers in soft, brown hair. You feel his heartbeat stutter beneath your fist, still gripping his tunic. For no more than a breath, you worry you’ve fucked this whole thing up. 

This is wrong! You scream at yourself. Wrong wrong wrong! 

But then he moves—hooking an arm around your waist, his nails sinking into your hip in an effort to bring you closer—and you loathe just how right this feels. 

Your legs tremble as his tongue slides along your lower lip, a soft moan spilling into his mouth. You feel him grin against you—can taste the blood on his lips, the bitter sweetness dancing on your tongue as he utters, “Eager, are we?” 

Tightening your grip on his hair, he hiss slips from his teeth. “Shut up.” 

He obliges—his mouth drifting from your lips to your jaw, leaving a bloody trail of kisses in his wake. You try not to think as he finally reaches your neck, earning a soft whine as he nips at your flesh. You try to forget who he is—that you’re supposed to hate him—as he shoves his leg between yours, offering you the very friction you so desperately desired. 

“This changes nothing, Benji,” you pant. 

He bristles at the nickname, letting his teeth sink deeper into your flesh, a deep bruise already blooming along your neck. “Sure." His own breathing is frantic and uneven as he rasps, “Whatever you say..” 

Your hand falls from his chest to his breeches, fingers already fumbling with the laces when you choke out, “I still think you’re disgusting, Blackwood.”

His own touch disappears beneath your tunic, fingertips trailing along every inch of your skin until his palms finally skim along your bare breasts. He gives one a rough squeeze before flashing that stupid, bloody grin of his. 

“And you’re still a liar, Bracken.”

a/n - writing fan fic for a character that hasn't even appeared on screen yet is wild. (hbo, this better be bloody ben or else I'll riot because this is perfect casting). anyway, I don't wanna be held accountable for how terrible, short, and rushed this is (I was bored and didn't feel like putting more effort into this than necessary rn) OR how wildly ooc this will likely prove to be come Sunday.

also---turns out that writing without actually knowing the character is hard! who'd have thunk, am I right?

[luveline]

hiiii jade!!!! could i please request something with peter with reader who’s maybe put on some weight recently and is insecure about it?? (totally not self indulgent at all) i totally get it if you’re not comfortable writing that stuff though so no pressure

hi lovely! ty for requesting. fem, 1k

cw for negative weight talk/ weight gain

Everybody gains weight during the holidays, you think, tracing your figure in the mirror. Though it's not strictly holiday season yet, it's edging toward the end of the year. Maybe my new year's resolution should be losing a few pounds. 

There's a thunk of the bedroom window being yanked open and footsteps across the floor. You tense until your hear Peter panting for breath, likely having swung to you at high speed, or fresh from a fight with an usurped criminal. 

You rush back into your t-shirt, knowing exactly what path he'll walk. He barrels into the bathroom, sees you at the mirror and smiles so wide his cheeks look fit to burst. "Hey," he says, peeling the suit off and exposing his boxers to you without shame, "hey hey hey. Can I persuade you in with me?" He nods toward the shower. 

"Not this time, Pete." 

"Too bad," he laments. 

You look away as he strips out of his underwear. The shower turns on and he takes you by the hips to move you out of his way with a murmured apology, near lost to the drum of the spray. Peter has moments where he doesn't know his own strength, but the majority of the time he treats you like you're something precious. 

"Stay in here!" he demands as he pulls the curtain shut. 

"I'm not going anywhere." You close the toilet and sit on the lid. "Tough day protecting the people?" 

"Apart from tripping into a deceptively large pothole, it was fine. Why won't you come in here with me? I wanna rub your shoulders." 

"You want me to wash your hair." 

"Exactly. So get naked and get in here. Don't make me beg." 

You really don't want to, and you're not going to, but it's not a big problem. Peter doesn't truly mind, he just loves you. "What do you mean, deceptively big? Like, knee height? Higher?" 

"Mid thigh, I'd say. The people of New York are never gonna let me live it down. One guy was recording me and said he was gonna put it on YouTube for the ad money." 

"Anything else?" 

He gives you the rundown, describing what perps he faced and an older man he helped use an ATM machine. You hum distractedly, pinching at the fat where it spreads on your thigh, sitting down as you are. 

He sticks his face through the curtain gap, hair slicked to his cheeks. "What're you doing?" 

"You told me to stay, so I'm staying." 

He's nervous for a split second, glancing back into the shower as though there's an answer there waiting for him before angling himself toward you fully, his naked chest dripping and shining in the bathroom light. "Okay, fine, we need to talk about something. But I want you to know that you forced my hand here. Okay?" 

"Okay." You nibble the inside of your lip, used to his theatrics. "What have I done?" 

"It's not something you've done. It's something you are. I can't even say it. I," —he pulls the curtain in front of his face, moves it aside again– "just need to tell you. Lately it's like you don't even realise how beautiful you are and I'm tired of it. You're radiant. Like, glowing." 

Your recent internal debate must show on your face, that doubt, because he gives you a steadying smile. "Really, really beautiful," he says more seriously.

It's easy to smile at him. "Thank you, Pete." You scoop his suit off of the floor. "I'll go scrub the tetanus out of this in the kitchen sink." 

"Wait–" 

He can't just get out with suds in his hair, giving you the perfect escape plan. You have ten minutes to yourself filling the sink with soapy water and steeping the fabric before he's out of the bedroom in pyjamas, trousers tucked into his socks and hair damp from ferocious towel scrubbing. "You're such a– such a– thing," he decides. "I'm telling you you're beautiful and you walk off so you don't have to hear it? What's wrong with you?" His voice slips into a kinder register. "You do know you're pretty, right? I'm not just saying it to say it." 

"I'm just feeling icky," you confide. 

"About what?" 

You want to tell him, you find. "You know how I've gained weight?" 

He doesn't need any more explanation. Peter knows you've gained weight, you've mentioned it to him, and it's visual, and he can likely tell whenever he decides to flex his strength. "What, and you think that makes you less pretty?" He puts a damp hand behind your neck to bring you forward. "Seriously?"

"Yeah, a little." 

He kisses you. His nose bumps your nose, his lips crushed to your as he holds you in place. Despite this, it isn't an overly rough connection. It's definitely not shy. "You're beautiful," he says in the space between your lips. 

"It doesn't suit me–" 

"It does. It really fucking suits you. Have you seen yourself? You couldn't look better." 

"Even when I was thinner?" 

"You look just as perfect then as you did now." His intensity fades and he encourages you back enough to see your face, his thumb rubbing a short line into your neck. His brows are furrowed, dark eyes darker for it. "Weight isn't a factor." 

"No, but you have to say that." 

"I don't. Not really. I'm sure there are a thousand shitty guys who'd tell you something different, but I'm not– I love you, the whole you. I like you like this." He grins. "Which should be obvious." 

You tsk at him, to his delight, his laughter boyish as he buries his face in your neck with a hug, kissing a messy circle up and into the soft line of your jaw. You trap him there without thinking, chin hooked down, squirming as he blows hot air into your skin. 

"I've been putting it on too," he says. "It's happy weight." 

"It's not happy weight for you, Pete, it's just more muscle." 

"It makes you happy, doesn't it?" he jokes, smiling and kissing and hugging you all at once. "Just like it does on you for me."

[ashwhowrites]

OMG I CANT BELIEVE REQS ARE OPEN YAYAAYAYAYAYAYYYYY

okay so basically i was wondering if you could do something with popular!bully!eddie x sensitive!reader

okay okay. so reader and eddie like each other but its a secret from the other and eddie bullies her lightly (cos he doesnt know how to deal with emotions) and shes super insecure cos she has like no friends and stuff and he went prom dress shopping with chrissy and saw reader there and teased her about the dress she picked and she got sad and cried at home then its prom and eddie's rejected everyone cos hes waiting for reader to show up and finally confess but shes nowhere to be found so he goes to her house with flowers or smth and he finds her crying and he comforts her and has her put her dress on and they kiss

IM SORRY IF THIS MAKES NO SENSE!!!

but thank you SO MUCH ash your writing is literally amazing it always has me in my feels <333 thank you for bringing so much happiness (and angst LMAO) to my feed!!

You are so sweet!! Thank you so much 🫶🏻I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting!

Prom Dress

Eddie never had a good hand on his emotions, he never learned how to express what he felt correctly. All he saw growing up was expressing emotions through anger. His dad was never around to tell him about girls and his mom was never there to teach him how a girl wants to be treated. So he went with what came naturally, except he barely ever felt real feelings towards a girl.

Until he met Y/N

Eddie was popular, it was easy to have girls on his arm and in his bed. But he didn't have feelings for them, so it was easy sweet talk and then they wouldn't talk again. But it was like his brain froze when he was in Y/N's presence. His sweet talk was out the door as he stuttered out something to say, and it was always a comment that sent her over the edge. He just didn't know that.

Y/N was a very alone person. She wasn't the best at making friends, making peace with being her own friend. She was insecure, never telling a boy how she felt because she knew it would go the exact way she thought it would. And when she realized her heart raced when Eddie walked in the halls, she knew that one would never happen.

Plus she has a good damn feeling he hated her guts. He added fire to the hell she lived in but there was something about him that she wanted. She allowed herself to be his punching bag because she felt alive when his eyes were on her. He was practically the only person that talked to her, and she didn't want to give that up.

Because at the end of the day, she had Eddie Munson's attention.

~~~

Eddie groaned as Chrissy picked up another dress to try on. He looked at his watch, annoyed that they had been in the same shop for two hours.

"At this point, Jason won't care what you pick. Can we please go?" Eddie moaned, his head thrown back as he sat on the uncomfortable chairs.

"You're fine. I have two more dresses and then we'll leave!" Chrissy sighed, going into the changing room.

Eddie moved his head back and looked around the store. He blinked a few times when he saw someone familiar. He stood up and slowly walked closer, squinting his eyes as a girl walked away from the register with a puffy pink dress.

"Y/N?"

She froze as she recognized the voice. Already on edge as she turned out. Panic in her eyes as she met his brown ones.

"Hi Eddie," she said, a small smile as she greeted him politely.

"Is that your prom dress?" He asked, his eyes looking over her shoulder as she held it.

"Yeah," she said quietly

"So you are going to prom? What? Alone?" He scoffed, a mocking chuckle left his mouth and Y/N shifted on her feet uncomfortably.

"Um, I don't know yet. Depends if someone asks" She shrugged

Eddie felt his body burn, a sense of discomfort thinking of someone asking her. Some guy takes her, takes pictures, and spins her on the dance floor. Someone she would have gotten dressed up for. He wasn't sure why the thought made him so damn angry. But the good news for him, he knew how to express anger.

"Ask you? You know that's not going to happen" he argued, his eyes dark as he stared down at her. "And while you are wearing that? A puffy pink dress, you think you are some fairytale princess? That dress looks like it's for a five-year-old old" He teased, but it wasn't his usual tease. This time it felt like every word he said sliced through her.

The one dress that fit her like a glove. The one dress that made every problem wash away. A dress where for once she felt beautiful.

She didn't say anything, just turned around and walked out of the store.

She cried as she raced to her car, harshly throwing the dress in the backseat. She cried the whole way home, feeling helpless in this world. She wasn't sure why it felt like everything was always up against her.

~~~

It was the night of the prom, and Y/N ignored the dress that hung up in her closet.

She bought it a week ago, a week since Eddie ruined the one bit of confidence she had left.

She wanted to return it, but the store wouldn't take it. So now she was stuck with a reminder that she would never be the gorgeous girl who walked into prom and changed everyone's perspective of her. She would still be that loser everyone laughed about.

So she stayed home. Her parents weren't too involved with her life, out on vacation as she sat on the couch. She watched romantic movies, crying as she stuffed her mouth with chocolate ice cream.

~

Eddie checked his watch for the tenth time of the night. The loud music overwhelmed him as he kept his eyes on the door.

"Want to dance?" A girl from the cheerleading squad asked.

"No thanks. I'm waiting for someone" he said with a tight smile, then moved his eyes back to the door

The prom started two hours ago, and she still wasn't there.

He turned down about ten dances before he took matters into his own hands.

He grabbed his keys from his pocket and hit the road. The flowers he bought sat in his passenger seat, guess he was going to drive them to her instead.

He pulled up to her driveway, letting out a nervous breath as he got out. He fixed his suit, patted down his hair, and gripped the flowers. He knocked on the door, stepping back as he waited for it to open.

"Eddie?" She was surprised, her body mostly covered by the door. Some sort of protection for herself.

He looked up and frowned. Her eyes were red and her cheeks were wet. And she wasn't anywhere near dressed up for prom. Her hair was down, but no makeup on her face.

"Hey, can I come in?" He asked

"Why?" She asked, covering her body even more with the door

"Why didn't you come to prom?"

She was surprised he even noticed. But she was more curious as to why it mattered to him.

"Didn't want to go. Is that all?" She snapped. It was enough that he could torture her at school and outside of school. But at her own house is where she drew the line.

"Um, uh, these are for you," he said shyly, not used to her face looking so annoyed and a snap in her tone.

She eyed the flowers as he held them out for her. She opened the door wider to grab them. They were truly beautiful and it was the first time she ever received flowers.

"Oh um thank you, Eddie," she said, smelling the flowers

"Can I come in? Maybe we can talk?" He asked, he twiddled his fingers as he waited for her to reply

"Uh sure but don't you have like a date or something?" She asked

"No, I was waiting for you," he said honestly, for once just saying what he felt instead of turning it into a joke.

She didn't know what to say so she opened the door and let him step inside.

She walked to the kitchen and got a vase for the flowers. He followed without asking.

"So why were you waiting for me? Was a big bucket of red paint gonna fall over me?" She asked, watching as the water filled the clear vase.

"No, why would I do that?" He asked, his head turned like a confused puppy

She laughed to herself bitterly

"Because you make my life hell" She looked at him like it was obvious. Softly placing the flowers on the kitchen table.

"I don't mean to, I'm sorry" his eyes looked sincere but she wasn't sure what trap he was waiting for.

"Then why do you do it?" She asked, her arms crossed as she angrily looked at him. Maybe this was her chance to finally stick up for herself and tell him to shove everything up his ass.

"Because I like you, and I wasn't sure how to show that" he explained, a small blush formed on his face as he muttered the words.

Y/N stood frozen as she stared at him like he had two heads.

Eddie confessed he liked her?

What kind of prank was this?

"Which I can see now I did in every wrong way possible. I'm sorry for everything, I didn't know I was upsetting you."

She sighed as the apology lifted some weight off her body. It felt nice to finally be apologized to.

"Thank you for apologizing," she said, a small smile on her face

"Thank you for allowing me to," he said, a shy smile on his face

They stared at each other, neither knowing what the next move should be.

"Can I uh see your dress? I saw it in the store but didn't get to see what it looked like on you" he asked, his eyes moving to the floor

"Are you going to make fun of me?" She asked, her arms crossed. Her protection shield is back up.

"No!" He shook his head dramatically, "I know my horrible take on flirting was more hurtful. So I will keep my mouth shut" he said

"That was flirting? God, you are horrible" she joked, loving the way the air shifted into something lighthearted. He laughed with her and agreed.

She led him to her room, allowing him to sit on the bed as she went into the bathroom to change.

She slipped on the pink dress, looking at herself in the mirror. That same rush of confidence filled her body. It was like the dress was magical and healed every broken part of her. She tried to reach the back zipper but couldn't get it. Her face was already on fire as she realized what she had to do.

She walked into the room, Eddie looked up from his hands and his mouth dropped. His eyes skimmed over her dress, the way it hugged her body perfectly.

"Could you zip me up?" She asked, turning around as she tried to keep her breathing normal.

He coughed and stood up. Wiping his sweaty palms on his suit pants. His fingers danced down her spine, making her shiver. He reached the zipper and slowly pulled it up, her skin disappearing under the fabric.

The room felt thick as she slowly turned around. The ghost of his fingers was still on her back.

"You look breathtaking," he said, his voice a quiet whisper as he looked into her eyes

She gulped when his eyes dropped down to her lips. Then he was slowly leaning in.

His hand moved up to hold her cheek, and his eyes moved up to her eyes to check for a sign of rejection. But her eyes were zoned in on his lips.

He smirked as he noticed, slowly leaning in until his lips pressed perfectly against hers.

She wasn't sure where to put her hands so she softly placed them on his chest. Her head turned as he deepened the kiss.

She felt like he kept chasing her lips, sucking away her breath as she gripped his suit in her fingers.

Her body buzzed with electricity. His lips and hands were softer than she thought they would be. His kiss was gentle and slow. Her stomach fluttered and her head spun.

He held back his moans as he slipped his tongue in her mouth. Her lips were soft and warm. Her hands on his chest made his heart race and his face flush. He tried his best to not get carried away, not wanting to scare her. His free hand slipped to her back as he pushed her further against him. He never felt this way ever when he kissed a girl.

She pulled back when she felt like she couldn't breathe. She took a huge puff of air into her lungs as they kept their faces close.

Panting against each other as they looked into each other's eyes.

Like she said, it was a magical dress.

Tags!

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93 @gretavankleep37 @bellaisswagger @arlx @ineedmentalhelp123

[slimepuparibaba]

LnDS HCs: Sylus (General HCs)

HI! I HAVE TOO MANY HEADCANONS FOR SYLUS SO PLEASE TAKE THEM!! THEY WILL DEFO NOT BE ACCURATE COME JULY BUT STILL IM USING WHAT SCRAPS OF INFO I HAVE RN AND IF HE TURNS OUT LIKE THIS APOLLO GAVE ME THE GIFT OF PROPHECY

IF THIS IS INACCURATE I WILL COMMIT CHAPTER 4 OKOK

GENERAL HC DUMP / PREDICTIONS (MAYBE DONT COUNT ON IT)

Okay, we all agree he comes off as the type of guy that would burn the world for you.

BUT!

Big but here.

I don't think he's a terrible boyfriend or anything. In fact, he genuinely does love you.

I believe, me personally, you are the one weakness this man has and he will treat you with care. Is the way he treats you rough around the edges and comes off a little different than most? Yes.

But he won't ever actually hurt you. He watches you from afar like a silent protector to make sure you aren't hurt, even using his Evol to make sure you STAY alive.

I personally think he might actually treat you kinda like one of his men, like an equal in terms of "you can definitely handle yourself and I know you're strong", but he'll still keep an eye on you just because you're that important to him. He trusts you.

...okay, so like, maybe not completely trust you because let's be honest here, you're kiiiinda prone to trying dumb shit on him, but it's funny. He'll forgive it. The smug bastard.

From what I've seen, he comes off cool, suave, knows what he's doing. Cocky.

Bad boy. He's a bad boy in all sense of the word.

He knows what he's doing, he's confident, he's charming. Knows what to say and do. He's also a CEO so dealing with people? Basically easy for him.

When it comes to you? He will flirt. Because he likes getting a reaction out of you.

I bet he teases you a TON. You hate him? Good. At least you have him in your thoughts.

Love is war with him. You try to scheme? He already has a counter. Man is 100 steps ahead of you, but just likes seeing you make a complete fool of yourself.

You know when he gets the upper hand he'll have that signature smirk of his that just screams "kiss me to shut me up and I'll consider this your win".

You thought Rafayel had an ego? Nah. NAH, THIS DUDE HAS AN E G O.

Sparring sessions with him are very likely. He'd probably be like "alright, but not going easy on you" or something cocky like that with a smug smirk on his face.

Man genuinely treats you as his equal though when training. Teaches you everything he knows and points out some techniques you might be rusty on.

Rizz is off the charts. He's lived in the N109 Zone and breathed it for so long. He's a sweet talker, so be prepared for him to know how to make you melt.

But also, he will actually spoil you. Will he make you work for it? Yes. He will give you an entire runaround (make you say please, make you verbalize it, etc), but he does it because he loves you.

You are genuinely his soft spot, and I CANNOT stress this enough.

The things he does in the dark are things he does FOR YOU. His reason for being REVOLVES around you, you just don't know it yet. Don't let him being the leader of Onichynus get to your head—he has method to his madness.

[loveandleases]

(So here it is, Cam's birthday post! This takes place when Cam and MC are teens. I struggled to decide when to set it and what scenario to go with but I think this is a good middle.)

Cam flops back on the bed, the phone pressed tightly against his ear as he listens to the familiar ringing. Waiting for the other side to pick up. To hear that familiar voice say his name, something that causes him such joy he was sure it would be deemed unhealthy by others. If he was being honest, he knew that how tight he tries to cling to you isn't the healthiest thing.

What feels like twenty minutes of waiting is more like two, but each second that passes by makes his insides tighten. A part of him always wondered if there would be a time when you would stop answering his calls. Would you tire of him like his family? Would Chris fill your head with so many lies you couldn't bear to even look at him?

Eventually, the phone clicks and his breath catches for the briefest moment until he hears you. "Birthday boy."

"Red," Cam whispers, though he isn't sure why. He's alone in his room at his parents. In a house of a family that treats him more like a stranger. A house he has been stuck coming back to for the past two months thanks to some power trip from his dad. Though he knew he would be escaping it soon, running away from home could practically qualify as a hobby for him.

"Didn't I tell you I would call first." you chided. He knew you meant well, it was a tradition. One would call the other on their birthday, even if the two of you would see each other soon, you still made sure to call. But something about this night had forced him to call you, to hear your voice, to recognize his existence.

"C'mon, you can forgive me this once."

"Aww, do you miss me?" You coo, your tone teasing.

"Course I do. It's been two months Red. That's the longest we've gone without seeing each other since we met. Not to mention, this will be the first time since we were kids that I won't see you on my birthday."

You both grew quiet, neither thinking to fill the void of silence between you, not until a snap of a twig caught Cam's attention. Pulling his whirling thoughts to his open window. Cam sits up, evening out his breathing to better listen. Probably just an animal. "So what did you-"

The sound of rustling near his window causes him to pause, body filled with tension. He's not afraid, why would he possibly be afraid of the idea of someone climbing into his window and possibly slicing his- Alright, take it easy on the horror movies Cam, you're being silly.

A gentle tap on the glass of the window is what eventually pulls him from his thoughts, he slowly makes his way over, each step quieter than the one before until he faces it. Cam leans out, hoping to see what's causing so much noise. Once he does he freezes, what's the old saying, like a deer in the headlights.

"R-"

"Surprise!" You whisper shout, dangerously perched on a tree limb.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Cam reaches for you, hands grasping and pulling you in. You both tumble to the floor your limbs tangled together.

Cam freezes, your faces so close together that you can feel his warm breath ghost your cheeks. "S..sorry. Still, what are you doing here?"

"I couldn't miss your birthday." you grin at him, ignoring the smudges of dirt on your face caused by climbing. It causes Cam to laugh, the first real laugh he's had in months. Not one crafted to soothe his mother's ego when something she says falls flat. A laugh that is not pointed at him when Chris tells a joke and Cam is the butt of it.

He cradles you as if you're his lifeline as if you're the very person that could make being in this cold house worth it because to him you are.

"Hope you don't mind, the only present I bought was myself."

Cam takes a deep breath, wiping away an invisible tear. "I guess it will just have to do." he teases.

With a playful shove, you sit up, pulling your warmth with you. The warmth that Cam tries to grasp with his hand but instead finds the corner of your shirt sleeve. "Promise me something," you whisper, eyes roaming around the room. Compared to that of his siblings the room is bare in comparison. A small bed, a shelf here or there, the walls bare of any coverings.

"Hm?"

"Promise me we'll never miss each other's birthday." at first you think he doesn't hear you. Not with how quiet he gets as he sits up his eyes never leaving you.

Cam sticks his hand out, pinky raised waiting to link with another. "Pinky promise." You suppose this was another tradition, something so simple yet so meaningful to the two of you.

Your fingers curl around one another and Cam winks, pulling your hand up to place a soft kiss. "I missed you." he mumbles.

"Likewise. But more importantly." you turn, hands clasped on the top of your knees clearing your throat as if the next thing you're about to say was of utmost importance. "Cameron Clarke, my best-friend, my ride or die. The Robin to my Batman." "Hey! I'm clearly Bat-" he interjects. "The mint to my chocolate, the peanut butter to my jelly" you take a deep breath, because the next words are going to be embarrassing. "My other half, and my soulmate." His eyes widen, what blush he had hoped wasn't showing before is far too hard to deny now. His pale freckled skin turned rosy, a better look if you had to admit it. Cam Clarke flustered was always a sight to behold because not many could do it. "Happy birthday."

[nicoline1998enilocin]

Unfamiliar feeling

PAIRING | Bucky Barnes x Nurse!Female!Reader

WORD COUNT | 1.7K

SUMMARY | You're the latest addition to the nurse team at the Compound, and you're assigned to take care of a certain grumpy super soldier and his wounds. You're treating him very gently and he's not used to this, but he welcomes the unfamiliar feeling nevertheless.

WARNING(S) | This is your official trigger warning. Do not proceed if any of these topics upset you. Light swearing.

Likes and reblogs will be very much appreciated 💜

Main Masterlist | Bucky Barnes Masterlist | Read on AO3

''Y/n, some Avengers are coming in with serious injuries today, and you're assigned to treat Sergeant James Barnes. I will let you know beforehand, he can be a real dickhead when it comes to being treated, he usually doesn't want any help. Try your hardest to get him some help, otherwise, we just can't treat him anymore,'' is what your supervisor tells you. Even though you've been a nurse for nearly 15 years, you recently started your job as a nurse at the Avengers Compound since moving to New York. You've decided to trade in the California sun for the business of a city like New York, finally fulfilling your lifelong dream.

''Okay, I'll take good care of him!'' you say with your usual cheery voice and a fresh batch of enthusiasm, and your face is pretty much permanently supporting a smile. This is your first time treating an Avenger, up to this point you've only treated other agents, and the injuries weren't too severe so far. ''At what time will he arrive?'' you ask and your supervisor tells you he will be in room 7 in about 10 minutes, so you go and get the room ready for his arrival, mostly checking if all your supplies and instruments are there and ready to go, which they are. You tie your apron around your waist and put on a face mask as well as rubber gloves right before Bucky gets wheeled into the room.

You see him and quickly assess any visible wounds, which there are plenty of, they must have gone on a rough mission. ''Good afternoon Sergeant Barnes, my name is Y/N and I will be taking care of you today!'' you say and the enthusiasm is practically dripping off of your voice, making Bucky's heart skip a beat, he wasn't used to someone like you treating him. He just grunted in response, not able to talk because of a nasty wound on his face and jaw. ''It appears you had quite the rough mission, but you're still alive and that's what's most important right now,'' you tell him and you start looking him over gently.

''To do a full examination of your wounds, I do unfortunately need to take off your clothes. Shall I give you some more privacy by closing all the blinds? It will just be me in here with you, but if you're more comfortable with it I can find a male nurse to look you over,'' you offer and he points a finger at you, which you take that he is okay with you looking him over. He also gives you a thumbs up when you ask him if he wants some more privacy, he isn't used to someone asking him this, caring about his privacy - he hasn't had any for so long he doesn't know how to act in all honesty.

''First, I would like to examine your face, that appears to be a pretty nasty wound,'' you tell him, just looking at it. ''Can I touch your face, Sergeant? That way I can clean it with a bit of alcohol, which is probably going to sting pretty bad. I think we won't need to stitch it up, we could probably get away with some butterfly bandages,'' you tell him softly, not talking too fast to make sure he can follow what you're saying. He softly nods and you grab your tray with the necessary supplies to clean and bandage his face. ''Is it okay if I put this tray on your lap for easy access? If not, I can put it on the bed,'' you ask and he shakes his head, notifying me he's not comfortable with it.

''That's no problem, Sergeant, I will put it on the cart next to your bed so I can still reach everything I need. Thank you for being honest with me, it is already uncomfortable enough to be here,'' you say with a soft voice, and Bucky isn't sure why you're so gentle with him, but he is very glad that you are. This feeling is strange to him, and it almost makes him tear up a little, it has been so long since anybody asked him for permission to touch him, it sends a warm feeling through his veins, warming him up from the inside. You clean his face with the alcohol and he flinches at the feeling, so you immediately retreat and stop your actions, until he's ready to go on.

When he's all cleaned up, you softly apply a few butterfly bandages, he only needed 5 so that's not too bad. ''Alright, your face is all done, and I have to say, I have never seen anyone look this good with 5 bandages on their face!'' you say and he blushes, which makes you chuckle. ''Next, I would like to do an upper body exam, meaning I have to check your chest, stomach, arms, shoulders, and back for any injuries. I need you to take off your tactical gear for me to reach those places. Is that okay?'' you ask, and after a short moment of contemplation, Bucky softly nods, helping himself out of his tactical gear. You softly put it on the counter behind you, so he can take it when he's done.

There are multiple wounds on his chest, but they don't appear to be as bad as the one on his face. ''I have to clean the wounds on your chest, the same way I cleaned the ones on your face. Is that okay with you?'' you ask and he nods again, he is slowly getting used to being touched by you, it almost feels like he's getting touched by an angel. All he can think about is how he would always like to be treated by you from this day forward. You give him the power to move on when he's ready, letting him take everything at his own pace. ''Thank you,'' he says with a deep voice, which honestly takes you by surprise, but you don't show it. ''For being so gentle,'' he finishes his sentence.

''It's okay, Sergeant. I get that it's not fun to be treated like this when you're at your most vulnerable. I try to make you feel as comfortable as possible, and we can go at your own pace,'' you tell him while continuing to clean the wounds on his chest. His face has softened a lot now, the grumpy scowl on his face now making a place for a bit of a relaxed expression. At first, Bucky was uncomfortable with you seeing his arm, he still wasn't entirely comfortable with it himself, but he got over that pretty quickly when he took his shirt off, you didn't comment on it, look at it weird, or even acknowledged it at all. Of course, you saw his prosthetic, but you've seen everything by now, so it didn't faze you in the slightest.

''Can you please lift your left arm so I can check your side and back for injuries?'' you ask and he does it immediately, the feeling he had at first being completely washed away now, he enjoyed you being so gentle, he missed this feeling and he welcomed it with every fiber in his being. ''You're looking good on this side, can you lift your right arm so I can do the same on the other side?'' you ask as you walk around the bed, but again no injuries. ''Also looking good!'' you say with a cheer in your voice. ''Do you feel comfortable with removing your shoes and tactical pants so I can take a look at your legs? You can keep your underwear on, I won't need to examine there unless you are experiencing pain in those areas,'' you tell him.

''Yeah, it's okay,'' he says this time, even giving you a small smile as he permits you. He quickly takes off his boots and pants and sits back down so you can examine them. Aside from some bruised, you appear to be good. Is there a specific place you need me to check out a little closer?'' you ask and Bucky shakes his head, he's feeling a lot better already, the super soldier serum also helping him heal faster than usual. ''Okay, then we're all done here for today!'' you say as you take off your gloves and face mask, showing him your big smile now. Bucky can't help but gasp softly when you smile at him, it's the most beautiful smile he has seen in decades.

''You can get dressed while I clean up, so we can discuss your wound care afterward,'' you tell him and he does so. You explain how he can take care of his wounds, and if there's any discomfort he can always come back. ''Again, thank you so much for being so gentle,'' Bucky said, ''It means the world,'' he says before getting up and walking towards the door. ''Sergeant?'' you ask, ''You can call me Bucky, doll'' he says and you blush immediately. ''Bucky? I'm glad I could make you feel comfortable. I'll be honest, I was told about your situation beforehand and I get it, it's nice to get a little bit of power back in a situation where you're practically helpless. It was my pleasure to take care of you today,'' you say and flash him another smile before he gave you a smirk back and walked out the door.

He felt like he was walking on a cloud, not having felt so well taken care of in so long. For nearly 70 years HYDRA just did as they pleased, so it did feel good to finally take a little piece of his dignity back. ''How did it go?'' Steve asks when he returns to the kitchen, where Steve was getting his after-mission snack ready. ''Actually, I think I have a new favorite nurse. She took great care of me, explained everything she was going to do, and asking permission along the way. It honestly felt good to have a bit of control about this,'' he said with a smile, and Steve completely understood. ''I'm glad to hear it, Buck,'' he said as he offered him half of his snack, knowing he was also very hungry.

[lunamadhatter99]

All for the cameras

Chapter 1

Finnnick Odair x Fem!reader

So... here's the first chapter of my Finnick series. I hope you'll like it and comment if you want to be tagged in the next chapters.

I warn you, it's a slow burn with LOTS of tension. But I think it's going to be worth it in the end. ❤️❤️❤️

Chapter summary: Y/n is the Capitol's Princess. Everybody in the Capitol loves her... unfortunately for her. This first chapter is a little introduction about her role as a "support mentor".

Chapter warnsings: mention of rape, prostitution, and... it's the Hunger Games... what can you expect.

The Victory Tour is probably the one thing I like about the Hunger Games. The attention of the Capitol isn't directly at me, but at the Victor in question, especially the pervs' attention.

Everyone thinks that being President Snow's protégé is like being Capitol's Princess, well... that's just what the cameras catch, but it really isn't. I am no different from someone living in the districts.

I am a slave like anyone else.

Even though I won't have to deal with the creeps at the Capitol during the tour, I still have a job to do, I can't exactly let out a sigh of relief.

This tour is probably the hardest one I've ever had to experience. Turning a hunter into an actress for the Capitol is no easy job.

Katnis has many skills... many, but pretending to be in love with someone isn't her best. Unfortunately, her life, anyone's life, actually depends on it.

Snow made it clear to me.

I arrive in district 12 with Effie and the rest of the crew, ready to help the two victors make everything as believable as possible.

I decided to go to Peeta first, while Effie and Cinna went to Katniss.

"Yes?" Peeta calls from behind the door.

"It's Y/n," I answer.

He immediately opens the door to let me and his stylist in and pulls me in a big hug.

"I'm happy to see you," he says, almost relieved.

"Well, it's my job, pretty boy," I pull away with a smile, "how do you feel today?"

He takes a moment to answer.

"I'm okay, I guess, nervous too,"

"You'll be fine, trust me. You're a natural." I try to lighten the mood. He does chuckle, but I think it's not to make me feel bad. "Did Haymitch tell you what to expect, or did he offer a drink?"

"A bit of both," he actually chuckles this time, "more of the latter, but yeah."

"Good," I let out a small laugh too, "I guess a good thing about your situation is that maybe you two can help each other out."

"If she stopped treating me like a wounded puppy..." he bitterly says, shrugging.

"Yeah, well, try talk to her. Your situation is already hard as it is, dealing with it on your own... it's suicide."

He nods, so I decide to let his stylist work and go see how Katniss is doing.

"Hey there," I say once I enter the room Katniss is getting ready in.

"Hi," she says.

"How are you?" I ask, sitting on a chair.

"I've been better," she forces a smile in my direction.

"I figured," I send her a sympathetic smile in return.

I look around the studio, the atmosphere is quite cold despite the luxury, we are still in 12 after all. My eyes stop suddenly on the desk, that was pushed a little out of the way to make more room.

"That's..." I start, my throat feels tight all of a sudden, "That's a pretty rose."

I notice Katniss tensing at the observation.

Confirming my suspicion.

Snow's been here.

"Yeah," she flatly says. She turns to look at me, with a look that seems suspicious... or cautious, more likely.

I respond with a sympathetic look. Hopefully, she will understand I'm just as tense as her. She seems to, because she half smiles at me.

"It's showtime," Effie cheers, walking in.

"Break a leg," I say, hugging myself as I watch her heading to the door.

I take a deep breath and decide I need a drink, and the only person who can help me is a certain victor.

I sneak out from the back and walk to Haymitch's house.

"Haymitch?" I call as I knock at his door.

"It's open," I hear his grumpy tone from the inside, so I let myself in and look around for Haymitch.

"Oh!" He calls from the kitchen, "it's the Princess herself! To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Care to help a lady out? I need a drink,"

"Take whatever you want," he offers, taking a sip of his own drink.

I look around at the variety of bottles on display, finding my drink of choice. I take the whole bottle.

"You don't mind if I don't use a glass, do you?" I say, sitting down with him.

"Make yourself at home," he actually chuckles at that, and I soon follow after taking a big sip from the bottle.

This is what I like more about this tour, Haymitch's company. We can just sit in total silence and still be able to give each other comfort. He's one of the very few people who knows the truth behind the Princess facade, and I know about what happened to his family.

"Ready for the tour, princess?" He suddenly asks me.

"It's the only time I get to feel like my own person again, so... yeah, I'm ready," I answer with a bitter smile, "what about you?"

"It's gonna be hard for them," he simply says.

"I know," I deeply sigh, taking another big sip, "they need us... and we need them."

Haymitch just nods.

"Things are about to change," he says, almost solemnly, "better keep those eyes open."

I send him a questioning look to which he answers with a wink. Then, a knock on the door prevents him from elaborating if he even wanted to.

"Guess it's time to go," he announes, clapping his hands.

"Let the show begin," I take one last gulp before following him out and towards the train station with everyone else.

--------------

We're heading to the first stop of this journey, distric 11. I already know this particular stop is gonna be hard for my Victors, especially Katniss. I take notice of her quietness and the tension in her body as Effie keeps in rumbling about all the fabulous things this tour will provide.

"Fabulous food, fabulous wine, the massages, spa treatments." She explains, "I told them nothing but the best for my two victors. It all needs to be..."

"Fabulous?" Haymitch finishes for her with a hint of teasing in his voice, mimicking her demeanour. I try to hide my smile into my cup in tea.

"Exactly." Effie answer, not bothered by him, "Now, the schedule is a bit of a bear. 12 days, 12 districts. But it's mostly parties, celebrations, adoring fans to greet you at every stop along the way, and then wrap it up on the Capitol. All you need to do is give a few speeches, wave at the crowds, and enjoy your time in the spotlight. You've earned it."

Oh shit.

"What did you say?" Katniss, basically, demands.

Here we go.

"Katniss." Peeta calls, trying to calm her or make her drop the subject.

"I said, 'Enjoy it, Katniss, you've earned it.'" Effie repeats.

"By killing people." Katniss scoffs and stands up to leave, ignoring Effie's weak try at scolding her.

There's silence.

"Well, isn't this a good start?" I say, holding my hand out to Haymitch, who catches on and passes me a bottle of whiskey chuckling.

I ignore Effie's glare and pour some alcohol into my tea.

My eyes lock with Peeta's, so I take the opportunity to glance at the direction Katniss went to silently telling him to go check on her. He nods and gets up to follow Katniss.

Haymitch follows him with his eyes, then turns to me.

"Are you plotting something?" He asks.

"Not at all." I simply answer, "they need to stop avoiding each other like the plague when they're not on TV. It's better to pretend to be in love with a friend than a stranger."

He simply looks at me nodding, impressed.

Effie lets out an annoyed puff and walks away.

Once she's out of the carriage, I turn towards Haymitch.

"Anything to say about my eyes?" I ask, hinting at the conversation we had back at his house.

He simply smiles and pours some more alcohol into his glass.

"Just keep 'em open, princess," he says, "wide open, guard up."

I roll my eyes, "Alright, alright. I will. Anything else you wanna share?"

"Did you hear from a certain fisherman?" Haymitch asks, instead of answering my questions.

"I don't know what you're talking about. " I say shrugging, and I take a sip from my cup.

"Mh," he hums, "isn't he the first Victor you helped train?"

"Why all these questions?" I slightly snap.

"No reason. This is the first time we get to properly bond, don't wanna waste it,"

"You want to bond?" I let out an incredulous laugh, "why?"

"I just proclaimed myself your... father figure," he opens his arms to present himself.

"Okay..." I trail off, standing up, "Whatever you say,"

I start to walk off, too, shaking my head slightly laughing.

"Oh, c'mon!" I hear him yell and laugh.

I shake my head while I'm heading to my room to rest a bit before we arrive in district 11.

As I lay on the bed, my mind can't help but wander to said fisherman.

Finnick freaking Odair. Winner of the 65th Hunger Games.

That was my 4th time assisting the mentors in preparing the tributes for the games. At the time, Snow wanted the people to see me more involved in the making of the games since they 'love' me so much. The president saw this as an opportunity, I saw it as a punishment, having to help train tributes, some of them being my age only to see them get killed. Then the 65th Hunger Games came, and so did Finnick. We were the same age, bonding was inevitable, even though he was cautious... which was understandable, but we managed before he had to go into the arena.

When he won, I was the happiest I've ever been. Then when he came back he was changed, again, that's understandable, but he started to push me away... with no explanation.

Then we both turned 16. Then we were forced to be close again.

----------

A knock on the door pulled me away from my thoughts, Haymitch's voice warning me we had arrived in district 11, and it was time to go.

We get out of the train, expecting some people celebrating and stuff like that, but nothing of sort. Effie is quick to express her disapproval.

They lead us to a car and let us in, where Effie start to explain the situation to Katniss and Peeta.

"The mayor will make some introductory remarks. And then you just have to say a few words." She says, "it's customary, of course, to give a brief eulogy to the district's fallen Tributes. For 11, that's Thresh and Rue. Here are the speeches."

Effie hands some piece of paper for them to take, I see Katniss' expression falling even more at the mention of Rue, predictable, so Peeta offers to be the one doing the talking. Katniss' grateful face almost breaks my heart, I'm... sort of used to see children die in the games, she wasn't... worst of all, she built a friendship with her.

"You got this." I say to them both, Peeta sends me a kind smile, while Katniss nods and takes a deep breath.

We arrive at the Justice Building, where we all wait for the mayor to call the Victors out.

"Ladies and gentlemen, the Victors of the 74th Hunger Games. Katnis Everdeen and Peeta Mellark!"

Once they are out, we get to see them through a screen.

"Thank you," Peeta says into the microphone, while Katnis is staring at something, I can imagine it's Rue's family. "We're honoured to be here with you today. And to be with the families of your fallen Tributes."

There's a long pause, Peeta glances at the cards in his hand and... put them down...

"He put down the cards." Effie gasps.

Haymitch tries to shush her, and she slightly snaps, "Why do I bother?"

I lock eyes with Cinna, who's standing next to me, we share a questioning look before looking back at the screen.

"Though they fought and lived with honour and dignity until the end... both Thresh and Rue were so young. But our lives aren't just measured in years. They're measured I the lives of the people we touch around us. For myself, for Katniss, we know that without Rue and without Thresh, we wouldn't be standing here today." He really is a natural. "So in recognition of that, knowing that it in no way can make up for your loss, we'd like to donate one month of our winnings to the families of the Tributes, every year, for the rest of out lives."

Oh, oh...

"Oh shit," Haymitch comments, and I bring a hand up to my open mouth shocked.

"Can he do that?" Cinna asks, though, I think he already knows the answer.

"He can't. But he did."

"Why doesn't he just stick to the cards?" Effie sighs.

Peeta than thanks the audience, looks at Katniss, and starts to walk back inside.

Katniss does just a few steps backwards, but she keeps staring at Rue's family.

Then, she gets closer to the microphone.

"Oh..."

"I just wanted to say I didn't know Thresh. I only spoke to him once. He could've killed me, but instead, he showed me mercy. That's a debt I'll never be able to repay." Then her eyes are back on Rue's family, " I did know Rue. She wasn't just my allay. She was my friend. I see her in the flowers that grow in the meadow by my house. I hear her in a Mockingjay song. I see her in my sister Prim. She was too young. Too gentle. And I couldn't save her. I'm sorry."

I feel my heart breaking at her words. She's right. She's too fucking right.

Before Katniss could add anything, there's a whistle coming from the crowd.

A very familiar one.

A man does the same salut Katnis did on the arena after Rue's death. Everyone in the crowd soon follows, and the Peacemakers are quick to weapon up and head towards the people, who can't do nothing but clamoring.

They're clearly pointing at the man who started it all.

As Katniss tries to get to him, to stop the Peacemakers, she is sized by two of them and forced back inside.

The man was dragged on the stage, the people are screaming, terrified. Before the doors can close we see one of the guards shoot and kill the man.

"Fuck!" I turn around, Cinna a gently rubs my back. I hear Katniss screaming and trashing around, I look back at them and see Haymitch gathering both Peeta and Katniss to follow him, he nods at mw to do the same and I do.

Once we are out of sight and ears Haymitch just snaps.

"You two have a very simple task." He scolds them, angry.

"I never meant for anyone to get killed," Katnis cries, "he has to know that."

"What are you talking about? Who has to know what?" Haymitch asks.

Snow...

"Snow. He came to see me. He's worried about rebellion in the districts. He thinks that they don't believe our love story," she explains, breathless.

I run my hand through my hair, frustrated.

"So he wants you to make them believe it? Does he thinks it will calm this shit down?" I ask and Katnis nods.

"You know, Katniss, you should told me that before I went put there, and tried to give these people the money." It's Peeta's turn to snap.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know what to do. He threatened to kill my family." She explains.

"Well, I have family, too" He replies, almost annoyed at her, "Okay? People that I need to protect."

"What about them? Who protect them?" Haymitch pressures.

I shake my head, still shocked and still infuriated.

"Katniss, what were you thinking?" Haymitch keeps going.

"I was thinking about Rue. Haymitch, please... please, just help me get through this trip. Please just help us get through this." Katniss begs, crying even more.

"This trip? Girl, wake up." He snaps his fingers to emphasise his words, "this trip doesn't end when you get back home. You never get off this train. You two are mentors now. That means that every year, they're gonna drag you out, and broadcast the details of your romance. Every year, your private life becomes theirs. From now on, your job is to be a distraction so people forget what the real problems are." He explains perfectly the 'life of a victor', it's so true it's nauseating.

"So what do we do?" Peeta asks, already composed him.

"You're gonna smile," I say, "stick to the cards Effie put effort into. And be the happy, forever in love couple the Capitol thinks you are... you'll get used to it." I say the last part with a heavy heart, knowing they don't deserve it. No one does.

Haymitch brings Katniss is for a hug, trying to reassure her, I squeeze Peeta's arm.

"We'll help you."

Peeta gives me a grateful smile, then they both take a deep breath and we all head back down.

"Eyes open, princess." Haymitch whispers to me, gently patting my back. I, again, look at him confused and just keep on following everyone back to the train.

And sticked to the cards they did.

----------

I feel like I can't breathe, I'm constricted, I can't move.

I look up and see the blue-haired guy on top of me, he's probably enjoying my terrified expression, because he smirks, he shushes me as if he's dealing with a child. He thinks he's being sweet and reassuring, while he's the complete opposite.

I try to push him away, in vain. It's like moving a wall... yet he's not that much bigger...

"Sshh, sweetie... it's okay, I'll take care of you." He says, caging me in even more.

I attempt to move back, but he's faster, he opens my legs with his in one quick motion.

----------

I wake up, shaking and panting. My heart is beating so fast I'm sure it's going to explode. I shake my head.

"Just a nightmare, just a nightmare," I keep repeating to myself like a mantra.

I get up from the bed and head to the bathroom where I wash my face to wake me up more. I look at my reflection and again I repeat that it was just a nightmare.

I get dressed, I figure there's no point in going back to sleep, I don't think I would be able too, so I exit my room and head to the restaurant car where I find Haymitch. Not so surprising.

He looks up as soon as he hears me, his expression almost asleep, but when his eyes meet mine, his expression turns into a worried one.

I sadly smile at him as I sit next to him, the car is still quiet dark except for the dim light coming from a small lamp next to him.

"Who was it this time?" He asks, he's trying to not make it look like it bothers him, but I know he's worried.

"The general's son," I say monotonously.

"Aah," he sighs, "the one with blue hair?"

"Yep."

"The loyal one." He nods to himself.

"The very one, the first too." I sigh, leaning back in the armchair. "The asshole thinks that just because we 'lost it' together means he owns me."

"Was that his first time too?" I know he wants to laugh at him, but he keeps it too himself, this time.

"Yap. His father thought it was 'right about time' so he talked to Snow, who, oh so kindly, accepted. Next thing I know I'm treated like a present. Everytime he achieved something big, his dad paid for my company, every birthday too." I sigh again, more deeply, bouncing my leg anxiously. "When he got a job, I was with him. Every month."

Haymitch takes a deep breath and hands me a bottle, which I gladly accept taking a big swig from it. He then takes my hand and squeezes it reassuringly, then lets go.

"He got daddy's job."

"Oh yeah. He couldn't do anything without daddy's power," I scoff out a laugh, Haymitch does too.

We, then, keep silent until it's time for everybody to come I'm and have breakfast and get ready for the final stop.

The Capitol.

[lastoneout]

Honestly, I don't say it often bcs I know how this site is but I really do think for a lot of survivors of abuse, especially abuse that went on for years and years, sometimes the message "it's not your fault, you didn't do anything wrong/to deserve this" while ABSOLUTELY TRUE* isn't actually super helpful. For a lot of us there's a LOT of guilt tied into it, and even if things were truly out of our hands we will not be able to accept that we are truly blameless, at least not at first, and maybe for some of us not ever. So being told "no dw you didn't do anything wrong <3 <3 you're innocent" feels...idk like some toxic positivity style lies. It doesn't make me feel better, because I still do feel like there were things that happened that were my fault, that were in my control, even an ethicist or god or whoever could look me dead in the eyes, weigh all the facts, and assure me of my complete innocence, and I still wouldn't believe it. (Tbh, you have to be ready to forgive yourself and trying to force it early does more harm than good.)

And I occasionally see movies and shows and stuff get roasted all to hell for having the audacity to go with a different message, to offer abused characters not a platitude about how they are innocent and should forgive themselves asap, but instead say "so what if it was your fault? so what if you fucked up? you're still alive, you still have time, your mistakes(or perceived mistakes) don't make you irredeemable scum who deserves to suffer, it's okay that you fucked up, what matters is what you do next, and even if the horrible thing was your fault in one way or another or you did actually hurt people, you still did NOT deserve to be hurt in turn" because people think that is like, admitting that the person in question is at fault when they almost always aren't....but as an actual survior, I'm sorry, you can tell me I'm innocent till the cows come home and I won't believe it. What I need to hear is that even if it was my fault I didn't deserve to be treated that way. I still deserve help. I deserve to keep going. I am not forever stained by my mistakes. I deserve a future free from this pain.

I think before we look at things in this like...grand moral way where we try to make sure we're sending the most Correct and Healthy Message Possible, sometimes it's worth asking if that message is actually the one the people it's about need to hear. I'm sure for some people it is very freeing to be told it's not their fault, but that kind of message does not resonate with me. And I, as well as people like me, deserve to expirience stories about us that are cathartic, that resonate, that make us feel seen, and to not have to see everyone and their mom throw a fit because what helps us is "problematic".

Anyway this has been mulling around in my head for a while and I def have a lot more to say about the way guilt manifests in trauma born of abuse, but yeah I just feel like this is something that should be talked about when we bring up abuse narratives and how well written they are and if they send the Correct Message, because the "Correct Message" is never going to be the same for everyone. And that's true of ANY demographic you could choose to represent!

Like some disabled people might enjoy the "magically healed" trope while others find it offensive. Some trans people like stories where transitioning is easy as drinking a potion or getting a fancy futuristic surgery and some find that that trivializes their struggles. Some queer people want stories where there's just no homophobia at all, others find that a world without it feels fake and patronizing. Some women do want to read stories about how keeping hearth and home is noble and empowering and others want read about women who have other jobs and never have kids or get married. For some of us "you're beautiful no matter what" is lovely and some of us just want to be told being fat and hairy and having acne and scars and shit is normal and fine. Or, like the last post I reblogged says, sometimes "you're not a burden" doesn't hit as well as "being a burden isn't a bad thing". No one type of representation is ever going to work for everyone, and that doesn't mean one type of rep is objectively wrong and the other is objectively right.

So yeah, the next time you find yourself angry because you think a story is sending the wrong message about a marginalized or harmed group, maybe stop for a second to ask yourself if it's actually harmful...or if you're not the person who the story is speaking to, and if there's someone it is talking to who desperately needs to hear what it has to say.

(*Getting ahead of this now: Do not put words in my mouth. I am not saying that any abused person in any way deserved their abuse or was at fault for it happening, that is not up for debate. The fault is always in the hands of the person who chose to hurt them. I'm just saying it's nuanced and complicated and guilt is a huge fucking issue that survivors have to deal with all the time and it's not wrong to acknowledge that some of us are always going to feel like we did something wrong and not be eased by being told otherwise even if the person saying it is 100% correct and/or means well. I do not have time for people who are going to willfully misinterpret me. You will be blocked.)

[natriae]

MINORS DNI

A/N: on my ushiwaka grind rn i love him

i fully believe that Ushi is not good at sex especially not the first time. He has no idea what he's doing.

He understood sex jokes in highschool but he just didn't know why tendou and the team thought they were so funny. Sex was not on his priority list, so he wasn't ready at all when you started to climb on his lap when you guys were kissing.

Somehow his brain told him to bring you closer, so he did just that, but you could feel the hesitancy.

"'toshi we don't have you," you tried to comfort the strong man.

"n-no i want to," but you knew deep down he was just saying what he thought was right based on what he heard in the locker room.

Safe to say you guys didn't have sex that night, but you did your best to make sure toshi didn't feel uncomfortable or feel bad for leaving you "high and dry". His therapist taught him that communication was very important to a relationship, so you were thankful he was blunt and clear with his feelings. He didn't want to mess up, or cum at the wrong moment.

You knew Toshi was a virgin but not because he was so worried about preforming wrong. Volleyball came easy for him but he always had to put a little more work into your relationship especially after seeing his parents. He wanted to treat you like a princess, and if he knew he couldn't provide you in some way he'd find someone else to do better.

"Toshi I don't care if any of that happens. It will be our first time. It won't be perfect. Just like Volleyball you practice all the time to make sure your skills grow."

"you're right, but can we still wait a bit?"

"of course, goodnight baby."

~

From that day toshi did as much research as he could to learn how to "preform" well during sex. He read blogs, he even asked Kageyama for help which lead to a very awkward stare off.

When the real thing happened he needed lots of help. You directed him to your clit, and things that made you feel good. Seeing his small smile brought you more pleasure then the sex itself. And Toshi was beyond proud of himself, but his confidence lowered when it was time for him to take his dick out. What if it doesn't fit? What if it doesn't feel good for you? He won't even be able to look at you in the face if he-

He feels you grab his face, "toshi look at me,". seeing your eyes look so deeply into his was enough for him to begin pushing it in.

Yes he did cum before you, but he kept going till he was overstimulated because he wanted to be perfect for you. Train himself to hold it till you came.

You ended up faking an orgasm because toshi looked to be in pain, but he doesn't need to know that.

So no Ushijima Wakatoshi is not good at sex, but he will practice just for you. And you are glad he was willing to step out of his comfort zone for you.

[oneforthemunny]

treat me rough |rockstar!eddie munson x pregnant!nepo baby!reader|

prompt: you're pregnant. you're horny. you're fed up with eddie treating you like you're made of glass.

loosely based off the song 'treat me rough' by debbie gravitte. give it a listen to get in the mood ;)

edit by the amazing, talented, show stopping @eddiemunsons-missingnipple say thank you rn

contains: MINORS DNI 18+. pregnant!reader, degrading (light), spanking, language, p in v sex, aftercare.

"Is this how it's going to be for the rest of our lives?"

Your tone was biting, unforgiving and jarring; not at all what Eddie expected to walk in to. Your arms folded over your chest, resting just barely over the swell of your abdomen that was rounding more and more with each passing day, a reminder that your baby girl was on the way.

"What?" Eddie's shoulders deflated, tone dropping and falling at your feet. Long gone was the anger in his tone, the usual biting or demanding snap of voice that would've sent you shivering, shaping up at his first warning glare. He sounded tired, worn out, or maybe worn down.

It made you furious.

You growled at him, little bare feet padding as hard as you could over to him, trying to sound threatening. "Is this it?" You snapped, throwing your hands out at him. "Is this how it's going to be forever, Ed, because I-I can't fucking do this." Your voice wobbled, throat constricting. You were angry at him, at yourself for crying, just overwhelmed entirely.

"Baby, what are you talking about?" Eddie cooed gently, taking a step towards you. Inked hands cradling your face, Eddie tilted your chin up towards him. "What's goin' on? What's got you upset now?"

"You!" Angry, you pulled your face out of his hands. His sweet voice was making your nerves grate even more. "Holy fuck, Eddie, you are my issue right now-"

"-Hey." Eddie snapped, eyes narrowing down at you. You stopped, eyes lifting up to him hopefully. A tingle spread between your legs, a glimmer of hope that he might be close to giving in to you, to putting you in your place. You'd been trying for weeks to pull out that angry, domineering man you fell in love with, the one he'd repressed inside himself for the baby. 

"Take it easy, alright? Your doctor told you not to be getting worked up like this. Your blood pressure can not rise, or it can be-"

You slammed your hand down on the table, glaring up at Eddie. "Eddie, I am fine." You hissed. "Actually, I'm not fine. And it's your fault."

"My fault?" Eddie scoffed, eyes bulging at your accusations. "What the fuck did I do?" Eddie held his hands up, pausing, before taking a regulating breath to calm himself. Goddam those parenting books he'd been reading, they'd actually put some useful stuff in there.

"What has you upset, honey?" Eddie asked calmly this time, looking at you carefully. "What can I do to help you?"

Your nose twisted, bristling with rage. You spun around, picking up the throw pillow off the couch, launching it at Eddie's head. Eddie dodged it easily, brown eyes wide with shock. He looked from you, back to the pillow, then back at you.

"What is wrong with you-"

"-You!" You screamed, turning on your heel and stomping up the grand staircase of the Malibu home.

"Hey, hold on a second," Eddie was hot on your trails, heavy boots stomping against the marble. "You have to talk to me, alright? What is the fuckin' deal?"

"You think I'm disgusting." You sniffled, wiping your tears with the heels of your hand. "We haven't had sex in forever, and-and you won't touch me or-or act like you love me anymore. I get pregnant, and all of a sudden you're-you're just a different fucking person, and I don't like it!" Your chest heaved at the admission, blubbering cries that shook your whole body. You knew you sounded petulant and whiny, and not on purpose. You sounded like the spoiled brat Eddie used to mock you for being.

Eddie fought every urge in his body to not roll his eyes at you, opting to hug you close to his chest instead. He could feel your running nose, rubbing your face into his shirt, soothing the burn of your cry while his hands rubbed circles down your spine. He didn't want you to stress yourself like this, put yourself and the baby at risk.

"Princess," Eddie cooed down at you. You sobbed at the nickname. "I don't understand. We had sex this morning, baby."

"T-That wasn't real sex." You sobbed, breathy and broken cries back into the cotton of his t-shirt.

Eddie furrowed his brow deep. "Pretty sure it was real sex." He said sarcastically, flinching when you let out a high pitched cry that had his hands moving to your hair, rubbing it softly. That always calmed you down. "What do you mean it wasn't real sex, baby? Did you not finish?"

"Well, yeah, I finished." You snapped, rolling your eyes like it was obvious.

Eddie's shoulders tensed, fighting the surge of irritation he felt in his veins. He longed for his cigarettes, hoping maybe he could get you calmed down and could go have a smoke.

"B-But it's not..." You huffed, frustrated at the struggle to find the words, they were jumbled and caught in your mouth. "It's not how we have sex." You blinked up at him, lip jutting out in a pout that had his heart fluttering. "You're not mean anymore."

Eddie smirked, a small snort of a laugh that had you frowning. "Not mean? Wow, never thought I'd hear that complaint from you." Eddie hummed.

You huffed, glaring at him. "Eddie, I'm being serious." You said, rolling your eyes hard. "Do you not... Do you not think I'm attractive anymore?" You muttered. You couldn't watch his reaction, knowing even the slightest off-putting look would leave you spiraling, inconsolable with hurt.

"Are you insane?" Eddie snapped, huffing in irritation. "Hey, look at me." His voice was firm, sending an icy chill up your spine, eyes lifting to his when his hand cradled your jaw.

Your vision was blurry, sniffling back the snot that ran down your throat when you met Eddie's eyes, warm and brown and familiar. It always left your chest light and airy, comforting and content.

"Why would you ever think I didn't think you were hot? Have you seen yourself, baby?" Eddie grinned, eyes traveling down your frame, tongue swiping his lower lip. His eyes trained on the swell of your tummy, small but present. You could still hide the bump with a sweatshirt of a dress, but it was getting harder with every passing day.

You wiped your eyes with the back of your hands. "You don't act the same. I just- I don't want you to get bored, and leave me..." You admitted, cheeks flushing at the vulnerability. Your heart hammered at the admission, a quiet fear you'd swallowed down since you first found you were expecting.

It wasn't irrational, at least not to you. Eddie was wild, he'd always been a little deranged and electric, and his sex life was no exception. It's what drew you to him first, what brought the two of you together. Now, with the baby on the way, you worried your marriage would become another statistic- failed and leaving your baby with a broken home or with two loveless parents. The thought made you sick, you couldn't do that to her. Or yourself. You weren't sure you could live without Eddie. For all your independence, he was your world; you couldn't lose him.

"Leave you?" Eddie scoffed, eyes bulging. He sounded offended, angry, your full name rolling sternly off his tongue, making your cheeks burn. He was scolding you like a school girl, eyes hard and challenging on you. Your pussy throbbed, legs crossing to soothe the ache. It had been a while since you'd played like this- months.

"I don't ever want to hear that shit again, do you hear me?" Eddie snapped. "Look at me when I'm talking to you, you know better." His inked hand grabbed your jaw, squeezing your cheeks lightly when he pulled your gaze back up to him.

Your tummy fluttered with arousal, heart skipping at the familiar thrill. Eddie's face was hard, eyes narrowed down at you. "I don't know if you're just trying to get me pissed off, or what's going on, but let me make myself clear. I'm not going anywhere." Eddie's jaw flexed, sincere and stern. Your heart swelled. "The only way I'm leaving you or baby girl, is if the coroner is taking me away. Understand?"

You nodded, restricted by his firm grip. "You're mine, you little brat." Eddie sneered mean, but his eyes were filled with love, the same adoration those mocha irises held on your wedding day- all three of them, actually. "Think I'd want someone else? No fuckin' way, baby, you're it for me. I can't wait to have a million babies with you. Love you and fuck you for the rest of my life."

Your lip wobbled, swallowing the burn of tears that threatened to spill again. Eddie's face softened, grip loosening on your jaw. "You've just been pent up haven't you?" Eddie cooed, his hand snaking from your jaw, gliding over your soft skin and to your cheek, thumb swiping over the cheek bone.

You nodded pitifully, legs crossing and squirming. "I haven't been doing a good job with you, have I? Haven't been keeping you in your place, huh?" Eddie mocked lightly. "Been letting you be so mean for too long."

"You have." You whined pitifully, placing your hand on top of Eddie's, eyes rounding to look up at him. "I've been so mean because you won't pay attention to me."

"Oh?" Eddie's brow raised, tilting his head to the side at your omission. "So this is my fault? My fault you've been such a little brat lately?"

"Yeah." You pouted, nose crinkling with the hint of a snarl. His eyes narrowed at you. "It is, Ed, you wouldn't fuck me right." You huffed.

There she is. Eddie snorted, tongue rolling over the front of his teeth. "Is that right?" He challenged. He pulled you close by your waist, so you were flush against him. Your bump resting against his own tummy, the feeling of that stretched skin against his had his cock stirring in his jeans.

"I think you need to be reminded of your place, don't you?" Eddie challenged. "Reminded who you belong to, and that bratty girls don't get to do whatever they want."

You whimpered at his tone, heart rate picking up slightly with excitement and anticipation. Finally, he was going to give you what you want. Treat you a little rough and fuck you until you were screaming.

Eddie held your wrist in his hands, a tight grip when he pulled you towards the bedroom. You pouted slightly, but didn't complain. You'd hoped he would take you into the newly finished 'sex dungeon' hidden behind a moveable shelf in his 'office', but decided not to complain. Next time, you'd get him in there.

"You've been so mean. Saying all that mean shit to me. Who do you think you are talking to your master like that?" Eddie scolded you, lightly and enough to leave your cheeks flaming. He pulled at your longe set, loose and flowy, comfortable and all that fit with the ever growing swell of your belly.

Eddie smirked when he pushed your pants down, little lace panties that held a damp spot on the front. "I've been too easy on you." Eddie frowned down at you. "You've been a bad girl. Very bad."

You couldn't help but grin. Even while Eddie was chastising you, stern and mean, his hands rubbed the swell of your belly lightly, cupping the rounded skin protectively. Your heart fluttered, blushing and placing your hands on top of his over your belly.

"I have been." You bit your lip, lashes batting up at him. "I've been so bad, master."

"Hold on a sec before we start," Eddie paused, dominant demeanor falling for a second. "You have to stop me if it gets too much, alright? Just stop if you feel like somethings wrong the second something feels off."

You nodded. "I will, Ed."

"Safeword?" Eddie asked, like the two of you hadn't played a million times before.

"Bats." You replied with a light eye roll.

Eddie caught your chin in his hands, eyes dark. "Did you really just roll your eyes at me?" He challenged. The switch was flicked with him. Gone was the doting, sweet, lover you'd had for weeks, and back was your mean man here to put you back in your place.

You pressed your lips together, squirming under his intense gaze. "I-I didn't mean to. I'm sorry-"

"-No, you're not." Eddie sneered. "But you will be, baby, don't you worry. I'll make sure of that."

Eddie's hand went to your hair, tugging you by the root towards the bed. You whimpered, scampering with every tug. Eddie plopped down on the bed, legs spread wide on the edge. "I should get the cane." Eddie threatened, eyes dark when they looked up at you. "Should get the clamps, too. Fig your ass and give you the cane for how mean you've been. Especially when I've been so nice to you."

You whimpered at the threat. All the things you loathed; figging, the cane, the nipple clamps. You'd nearly safe worded on all of them separately, so together, you couldn't imagine. You hated the way you throbbed at the idea.

"I didn't-"

"No." Eddie snapped, jaw flexing up at you. "You've said enough. I'm sick of your mouth. Keep it shut, or I'm gonna gag you."

Your lips pressed together, postured straightening, an instant reaction to please him. "You know what I think? I think you just want attention." Eddie hummed at you. "I think you want attention, and that's why you've been so mean. Is that right?"

You stayed still. Eddie's hand cracked down on your tit, lighter than usual, but enough to make you yelp. "That was a yes or no question, so answer me." Eddie held his hand up when you opened your mouth. "I don't need to hear your voice. Shake your head yes or no."

You pouted, a shiver passing down your spine, your head bobbing gently. Eddie frowned. "That's what I thought." He sneered. "Knew there was a good girl in there somewhere. She just needs some help coming out, doesn't she? Need a little coaxing."

Eddie's hand was on your wrist, tugging you closer to his spread legs. "Don't you worry, angel, I'll get you back to being a good girl."

Eddie pulled you closer, guiding you gently over his lap. Normally, he would've yanked you over, had his hand wailing on your ass unforgivingly before you were ever settled, but he needed to be mindful of your bump. "That comfortable? Feel ok?" Eddie asked gently, rubbing a soothing hand down your spine.

Your chest filled with heat, cheeks flushing. Your bump rested between his knees, ass perched over his right leg, upturned and presented for him while your upper half laid on the bed. "'M alright, baby." You replied sweetly, a small hum of content, crossing your arms in front of you to rest your head on.

Eddie looked at you carefully. "You sure? Need a pillow or anything?"

"No, baby, I promise I'll tell you if it starts to hurt." You replied, wiggling your hips on his thigh.

Eddie leaned down, hand cradling you hip, lips brushing your cheek gently in a sweet kiss that left you blushing. His hand rubbed over the swell of your ass, mouth filling with spit. God, your ass had gotten fatter with the pregnancy. His hands kneaded, squeezing the fatty flesh. "Fuckin' delicious, baby, look at you." He rasped, a low gravely tone that made your thighs clench.

You whined lightly, every squeeze and grasp of his hands on your skin making your tummy flutter with heat. "Think I might keep you like this forever." Eddie hummed, spreading your cheeks apart, peeking at your puffy, slick lips. His fingers slipped between your legs, swiping through your drenched folds.

You mewled, back arching further at his touch. Eddie moaned loudly, swirling the fingers with your release around his tongue, eyes fluttering shut. "Christ, baby, you've never tasted better." Eddie groaned.

"Stop teasing, Ed, please." You whined, loud and nasally, lip jutting out in a pout.

Eddie's eyes flashed down at you. "Who?" He challenged, head tilting to the side menacingly at you.

"Master." You squeaked, shrinking back down into yourself in submission.

Eddie shook his head, letting out an airy, mocking scoff. "Oh yeah, you've gotten way outta line." Eddie snarled. "Went too easy on ya and now look," Eddie lifted his hand, palm cracking down on the center of your cheeks in a sharp, stinging smack. "You're just all sorts of bratty."

You gasped, had lifting and tilting back. You closed your eyes, relishing in that familiar sting that faded into a low burn, hips grinding subconsciously onto his thigh for friction.

Eddie's hand came down twice, one to each cheek, hard and loud. You squeaked, fisting the sheets. "I thought you'd be better. Thought I'd trained you better." Eddie huffed, feigning a sigh of disappointment. "But look at you. Still such a bratty little bitch, aren't you?" Eddie's hand fell heavy, four spanks on the globes of your ass.

You weren't sure if it was the pregnancy or the fact that it had been so long since he'd spanked you, but you were throbbing, that tight, burin gin coil urgently pulling tighter and tighter in the pit of your tummy. Every spank was heightened on stinging flesh, sending shockwaves of pleasure straight to your aching core with every sharp smack of Eddie's hand on your ass.

Eddie's hand found your hair, fisting it and holding it into a makeshift ponytail, lifting you up. Your belly dipped deeper between his legs, back arching. Eddie brought his hand down again. "You gonna finally be a good girl for me?" He hissed in your ear. "Finally behave?"

You whimpered in response, eyes pinching in pleasure. Your hips rocked against the fabric of his jeans, lip biting. Eddie's hand crack down hard, right where the meat of your ass met the top of your thighs, one hit for each.

"You fuckin' forget how to talk, huh? All you've done for weeks is ran that bitchy little mouth at me, and now you have nothin' to say? Answer me." Eddie sneered.

"I-oh!- I'll be good, master, please." You felt close already, and Eddie wished he could say he was shocked. You'd been so sensitive, everything heightened and electrified the further you were along.

"I don't believe you." Eddie scoffed, his hand fell on your ass again, leaving you gasping, lips biting to hold back your pleasure filled moans.

Eddie guided you down gently, hand pressing to your back. He was worried about straining your spine, knowing your lower back already hurt enough. Eddie's hand fell back onto your ass, mouth watering with ever jump and ripple of your fatty skin. His cock lurched at the jiggle of your pinked flesh, splotchy with his hand marks that painted your skin.

You squirmed, gasping at the assault. "I think," Eddie started, his hand falling rhythmically from one cheek to the next, over and over again. "That you haven't learned your lesson." You whined, arching into his hand.

Eddie knew what you wanted, he knew you better than anybody. Knew what your body needed before you did. He aimed his smacks a little lower, every hit a target to the center of your cheeks, hard and sharp, hitting the same spot every time. The spot that sent vibrations to your clit, shockwaves of pleasure building. He didn't deviate from rhythm, urged on with every gasp and whine of pleasure that came from your lips, hand tightening on your hip to keep you in place while you squirmed.

"You gonna be a good girl for me?" Eddie asked, taunting and mean.

"Yes, fuck, yes I will!" You moaned, voice cracking with the small shake of a cry. Emotional release you'd held in for too long mixing with the overwhelming need to cum.

"I'll be so good, Eddie! Soo good, please, just-ugh!- Please right there! 'M so close, so close...." You panted, toes curling, hips rolling, and face crumpling from the building pleasure.

Eddie didn't let up from the same spot he'd been spanking, the red glow coming from his relenting hits. "Don't lie to me, baby." Eddie teased. "You know I don't. like. liars." Every gritted word was annunciated with a hard smack, palm flat and cracking down over the center of your ass, his heavy hand covering a good area of your ass.

"Oh!" You cried out, the last spank to your burning cheeks making your legs starts to tremble. "I'll be good, I'll be good, I'll be good..." You chanted, breathlessly, eyes rolling back.

Eddie flexed his leg so your hips were raised, giving you a final hard crack of his palm, the one that had that tight coil snapping, ecstasy washing over your, leaving you gushing and sobbing from the sensation. The bubble of emotion popped in your chest, leaving your wracked in sobs, writhing over his lap. Eddie continued spanking you all over, alternating from light, playful smacks covering each cheek and the top of your thighs while you came down, shaking lightly from the intensity of the orgasm.

"You gonna be my good girl?" Eddie asked. He was more so lightly patting your reddened ass now, just hard enough to sting for a second over the already irritated skin.

Your eye were glassy, wet with tears, chest heaving and shuddering. "Yeah..." You whined, nasally and breathy.

Eddie grinned, pushing your hair out of your face, smirking down at you. You looked so fucked out already, eyes shining and glossy, lips swollen and pouty from your tears and bitten lips. Eddie's hand rubbed down your abused ass, the hot flesh skating over his calloused fingers.

"Yeah, I think so too." Eddie cooed sweetly. "You're my good girl aren't ya? Just need to be reminded sometimes, don't ya?"

"Yeah..." You sighed, just as breathy and dreamily as before.

"C'mere, lil mama." Eddie smirked, shaking his head. He helped you up slowly, pulling you onto his lap gently, cradling you against him. You could feel his erection on your hip, prodding into your skin from beneath his zipper.

Eddie's hands stroked over your cheeks, wiping your stray tears away, pillowy lips kissing at the salty, wet skin, nose nuzzling into the flesh. "My sweet girl, aren't you?" He cooed. "Feel better?"

You nodded, nosing towards his cradling palm. "Much better." You muttered, eyes lifting to him. "Thank you, baby."

Eddie smirked. "You don't ever have to thank me, baby. I'm happy to help, anytime." He winked at you. "That was ok? You feel ok?"

You nodded, brows furrowing lightly before looking up at him. "Are you not going to fuck me?" You asked bluntly.

Eddie laughed loudly, shaking his head at you. Still so bratty. He couldn't blame you. You were a woman who knew what she wanted.  "I was getting to that." He pressed his nose to yours, rubbing it back and forth against yours. "Have a little patience, hm?"

You gave a light giggle. "Not my strong suit, baby, you know that." You batted your eyes cheekily up at him.

Eddie scoffed loudly, nose pushing the air out harshly. "Yeah, no shit. Been with you a while, honey, I picked up on that." He chided sarcastically.

"Yeah? Must like it then if you stick around." You challenged, the hazy fog from your orgasm clearing lightly.

"Fuckin' love it." Eddie breathed sincerely, hand cradling your cheek, tilting your head back, lips hovering over yours. "Wouldn't have you any other way. My perfect girl."

His kiss was sweet, passionate- not the usual kiss you got after such a rough scene. Normally it was teeth clashing, lips gnashing and biting, angry and fighting for dominance. No, this one was tender, full of so much love, mimicking the night Eddie proposed to you in Malibu.

Eddie fucked you slow and deep, hips rolling into yours, body pressed over yours mindful of your bump. His fingers intertwined with yours, face in your neck, your legs around his hips while he rocked into you, deep brushes of his cock inside you that had you you coming undone easily over and over again.

You knew Eddie would be a great dad. You had no doubt about it. You only wondered how he'd handle two girls he could never say no to.

this one is for @lilpotatobean2 bc I know these two are your faves haha :)

[madwomansapologist]

living as shan yu's prisioner/bride would include

Masterlist | Rules | Taglist | Library | More Shan Yu | AO3

synopsis: After the initial fear and distrust, you undertood that you only had one choice: adapt. And, going against everything you knew about yourself and the world, you discovered that it weren't that hard. That Shan Yu wasn't that horrible.

warnings: female!reader. shan yu (that's my wife. yeah, i decided that 30 seconds after meeting her. she's my soulmate, idiot) x reader (slow down, big boy, i have standarts. oh. you gave me a horse. you're kinda of reaching them). mentruation because i'm a whore for domesticity in moments of vulnerability. violence. not that dark. it's kinda about the first steps of falling in love when your logic says you're not supossed to. in this house we hate the misogynist version of Shan Yu in Mulan (2020).

note: that happened right before the end of this. hope y'all like it!

• You felt guilty. So dirty. How could you feel that way about it? But it didn't matter how many times you told yourself that you shouldn't feel that way, you did it anyway. A heart feels whatever it wants. And yours feel free.

• That's something special about feeling the air against your body, the speed of your horse, the world moving on with you. Not despise you, not without, but with you. And it felt so good. Like it was supossed to be that way.

• When Shan Yu gave you a sorrel, he knew you wouldn't try to run away. Quickly after meeting him you knew you couldn't. It would be impossible for you to escape the Huns. And even if you did: then what would you do? Who would be able to help you? You knew that you couldn't, but Shan Yu also didn't gave you a reason to try.

• Yes, he kidnapped you. That is reason enough for you to at least try. But Shan Yu said he would make you his Empress. Endless times. He talked about how you'll reign beside him. You have classes about war, history, economy. The other Huns treat you like you had spend your lifetime with them. He'll make you his Empress. If he win the war, of course. And he promissed that you'll see your family again after the war.

• Shan Yu made clear that he wants your heart. He won't touch you, not without your consent first, but you're his bride. He made sure everyone knew that. You're his. His bride, his future wife, his mate. You don't know how anyone could fall in love that quickly. You believe him, Shan Yu have no reason to lie, you just don't get it. It may be that easy to him, but it isn't for you.

• You would never chose to be close to him if things were normal. The leader of the Hun army, an enemy of the Emperor, his fame precedes him. But things aren't normal, are they? You don't love Shan Yu, but you certainly don't hate him. And sometimes you think that he would be nice as a friend. Someone that would be easy to be around.

You were freaking out. You woke up in pain, and it took you a second to figure out what was that warm feeling in between your tights. Tears were rolling down your face when Shan Yu suddenly moved on his bed.

"Are you hurt?" You don't know how he did it that quickly, but when you looked at him Shan Yu had his sword on his hand. That man was ready to kill someone. The moonlit made it easy for you to see him, which means he could also see you. That made you feel so embarrassed. "Why are you crying?"

"Look away!" You shouted. Shan Yu almost did as you demanded, but he couldn't just ignore your tears. You tried to grab the bed sheets, but your sleep weaked your movements. "Just go back to your bed and leave me alone."

Shan Yu approached, and then he understood. He's experienced in the battlefield. Shan Yu would be able to recognized blood even if blind. "I will prepare a bath for you. It will help cease the pain."

"Stop", you could feel your body getting so warm. "Just leave me alone. I'm embarrassed enough."

Shan Yu sighed. "Embarrassed of what?" You pointed to the sheets. "Do you think that's the first time I see blood? Are you afraid I will faint?"

That made you chuckle. "No."

"I will prepare a bath for you." Shan Yu walked towards the bathroom. "Just sit down and wait."

That's what you did.

• Shan Yu isn't violent. Not to you. You fought his men, screamed at him, called him a liar: he never reacted. And he can be somehow kind when he wants to. You can sense that he's always checking if everything is okay with you. And he can be fun. In a weird, little bit off, kinda of way.

• Like how Shan Yu knows when he's better than someone and just let them dig their own graves. It isn't him being patient, coward or anything else: this is Shan Yu having fun. He likes the chase. You heard countless people calling him a monster, but you disagree. He's a predator.

• Fun. In a way that you don't really understand. And you would never say this out loud, not even under torture, but you feel that life would be easier with him. Or at least it wouldn't be the worst thing ever to stay beside him.

• Shan Yu isn't violent, has a good sense of humor, somehow respects you. Money would never be a problem. Even during a war, Shan Yu gave you clothes to fill countless wardrobes. And with him you're safe. You knew his fame, and now you know it fits him.

• It's nice to not worry about marriage. There is no family talking about how you should've already married to someone. There is no such a thing as spending sleepless nights thinking about what would happen to you if your father die before you can find someone. You don't worry about this anymore.

• So, yeah, somehow you enjoy that situation. Not love, and you certainly didn't dream with having that type of life, but you found yourself enjoying your time with the Huns. Your time with Shan Yu.

"You know that you don't need to run everytime, do you?" Shan Yu asked, scaring you. You didn't expect him to be behind you. You didn't even heard him approaching. Before looking at his direction, you could see that constant smirk on his face. "Horses are able to trot."

As usual, when you got the chance you ran with your sorrel, you did it. Feeling the air against you, a type of freedom you never experienced before. Exhausted, you waited for them to reach you.

For him to reach you.

Shan Yu grabbed your sorrel's rein, guiding him. You let him do it. Your body was already tired. Unlike him, you're not accustomed to ride for so long. And you could go to your carriage, Shan Yu wouldn't said no to you, but you know why he gave you that sorrel.

Before his gift, he led the army mounted on his horse while you stayed inside the carriage. Now, you can ride with him if you want to.

"Maybe I'm trying to runaway," if you know him well enough to understand the way his humor works, then he better understand yours. "Smarten up, big boy."

But you think there is another reason for that present. A thing that you noticed a while ago. The way he lighten up when someone mentions that you can fight. Or when you share your opinion, regardless if it's what he wants to hear. Shan Yu likes to see you fearless. He likes when you talk back. When you make sure everyone heard what you have to say.

"It's a joke," you told him. "I'm not planning on running away."

"Why?" Shan Yu said so calmly, but you could hear it was a honest doubt.

You also thought about it before. Why didn't you run away? Okay, using your logic you understood it wouldn't work out, but somethings aren't about logic. Humans don't usually do things only because of logic. Why your emotions didn't made you try everything you could? Why didn't you at least tried to runaway from him?

"I hope to never see a matchmaker again."

That made Shan Tu buffaw. "Alright," he nodded with his head. "It's a promise: you'll never see a matchmaker again in your life."

"Watch out," you smiled at him. "I may fall for your pretty promises."

"I'm counting on it."

• Things weren't perfect. Of course they weren't. But that feast was the last straw. There are some lines Shan Yu can't cross without you reacting. There are things that not even your logic can ignore. Things that made your heart decide to act. And of course it included him being violent. You should've know.

• All night long, you could feel his eyes on you. Those yellow eyes, following your steps like if you were a prey, would never go unnotice by you. Not even the loud music of the feast, the amounts of alcohol you drank, the way your feet were already aching because you danced for so long: you could feel Shan Yu watching you.

• You know he wants to join you. To dance with you, to hold you, to have you. You know that. But Shan Yu promised he would only touch you after you decided that you want him to do it. And you didn't say anything. You didn't try anything. You did not gave him permission, so he only watchs.

• At some moment, when it was already midnight, you fell. It wasn't anything important. It didn't hurt you. It was more embarrassing than anything else, but you were drunk enough to not care about it.

• Someone helped you getting on your feet again. Just a kind hand for you to hold on until you were sure you wouldn't fall again. For a second, you forgot about his eyes on you. You just hugged whoever helped you in a way to show your drunkness gratitude. And that was when Shan Yu made sure everyone knew he was still there.

• Shan Yu is quickly. Your mind, lacking sobriety, almost didn't record him moving towards you. You just noticed what was happening when Shan Yu hold the man by his throat, pulling him away from the floor. You knew he was scary, dangerous, cruel. You knew that. But you never saw it. You never saw how his eyes can burn others. You knew who Shan Yu was, but you never saw it.

• The poor man were turning blue on his head, barely able to struggle against the strong hold on his neck, trying to say something. Trying to say he was sorry. You were frozen in place, almost convincing yourself that it was all a nightmare, until Shan Yu dropped the man on the floor. He coughed, trying to breath again while thanking Shan Yu.

Shan Yu looked at every single person on the feast. Every single one. "No one touch what's mine."

Shan Yu wasn't only punishing him, but teaching everyone around him a lesson. And you can't deny, he was a great teacher. Everyone seem to understand. Everyone seem scared enough to never go against him.

But when Shan Yu looked at you, he didn't saw your usual challeging gaze. He didn't saw joy, or tiredness, or surprise. He didn't saw fear. When Shan Yu looked into your eyes, all he saw was disgust.

Your gaze alone made something itch inside him. But your words cut his soul in places he didn't even knew existed.

"You will never touch me," you whispered, only for him to hear. "I will never love you back. Hurt whoever you want, hurt me if you desire, you will never have me."

You told Shan Yu to smarten up. At the time it was only a joke. But now, after seeing how cruel he can be and hearing what he had to say, you changed your mind. Your heart feel smaller. You won't stay here for long.

Without giving him a chance to reply, you turned your back on him and walked towards your carriage. You stood there until you were sure no one had followed you. You put on your boots, grabbed a bag with food and water, and went to the stable.

You were lucky. Everyone was at the feast, which means no one was there to see you riding your sorrel. Which means no one was there to see you running away. Which means your carriage was empty when Shan Yu went there looking for you.

You knew the path you need to follow. Your could hear the river, you saw the birds flying north, all you need to do was to be faster than the Huns. And you're almost sure that they're all drunk.

At some point, maybe twenty minutes after you exit the stable, you heard another horse. You couldn't see it, but you knew it was Shan Yu. That scared you, made you shiver, but you didn't stop. You just went faster and faster.

Shan Yu is strong, but he's too strong. His horse wouldn't be able to compete with your sorrel. He can try, but you know for sure that your sorrel needs to worry about less weight.

He was close. But not close enough.

You don't know for how long you tried to make him struggle, but at some point it started raining. It was harder to see the path, you were shivering, and the ground turned muddy. You tried, you really tried, but nothing can control a horse's response to thunders.

You almost fell when he jumped, your hands burned holding the rein. You weren't so lucky the next time. When you collapsed on the floor, you felt like all the air in your lungs had imploded. You tried to move, the rain falling on your face kept you awake, but you couldn't stand. It burned.

And that gave Shan Yu exactly what he needed: time.

When another thunder came, you rolled to the side so your sorrel wouldn't step on you. You crawled on the ground, holding your head as if it would fall from your neck, and struggle to stand up. It hurts, it burns, but you're stronger. It felt like it was impossible, but you stand where once you fell.

It was hard to control your tears, and even harder to deal with the pain on your chest. You tried to hold your sorrel by its head, but he was so scared. You didn't stop trying to calm him down, but then you heard.

Shan Yu reached you. There he is, so close and yet so far away. Riding his own scared horse, rain dripping on his skin and marking his clothes. He wasn't wearing his usual fur. No. Shan Yu was still using the clothes for the feast.

That made you think less of him. You prepared. You have food, water, maps. And he just took a horse and went to search for you? Why would he act so unprepared?

With thunders ecchoing on your ears and pain spreading along your chest, the right answer didn't even passes through your head. Why Shan Yu was unprepared to the cold, to the rain, to the chase: because he was scared. He was scared that one second he wasted not looking for you would be the second that would separe you both forever. Because Shan Yu was scared. So scared.

"I won't stop trying," you shouted at him. It was so dificult to find strenght to say things, but you did it anyway. Screw it. Don't matter what he does, you will keep trying to flee away from him.

"Don't be stupid." Shan Yu jumped from the horse. You could hear the tiredness on his voice. He also sttrugled with his breath. "Are you trying to kill yourself? What would you do? Keep riding in the rain, waiting until the cold took your body?"

"I would rather die than live as your object!" You tried to mount your horse again, but he keep moving away from you. He was so scared. You caressed his fur, trying to make him stop. "For once, be honest with yourself. Face the truth. You don't love me. You won't have a happily ever after with me like in a old fairytail. I'm just someone you saw naked once. I'm not a person for you. I'm something that only you can consume."

Shan Yu walked towards you, but you moved away. He was trying so hard to be calm. All he wanted to do was took you on his arms, put you on his shoulder and walk you home. Home. There you could scream for how long you wanted. You could speak, he would hear, and things will change. He sighed. "That's not the truth and you know that."

"Do I? Because that is all I know. You saw me naked and now you do anything you can to make me let you fuck me. A person touch me and you almost killed him! Why won't you get over it? Find someone else!"

Then Shan Yu realized that no, you didn't know. You really didn't understand? How could you? He said to you so many times. Shan Yu made sure that you would see it, but you didn't. "I love you," Shan Yu didn't know what else could make you understand that. "I won't find someone else, because you are the one. We are meant to be. This isn't about your body. This isn't about your touch. All I do is to make you see it. To make you want to be mine."

You just glared at him, trying to understand what your mind wanted. Trying to understand him. "But why? Why do you feel this way about me?"

"Because you're like me."

"No. I'm not," you didn't move this time when he stepped closer. "I'm nothing like you."

"You want more of life," Shan Yu stood right in front of you. "You don't want to go back to a dead village, to go through the same day again and again, to no be remembered. I know you want more. You want to see the world. You want to feel free. It's your time to be honest with yourself. Face the truth. You want more."

Shan Yu wanted you to agree. He wanted you to say he was right, that you want more, that you want him. But he thought you would scream at him, push him away, declare your hate for him. He didn't imagined you would cry.

"I don't," Shan Yu stopped. He didn't knew what to say. He didn't want you to cry. He didn't want you to react this way. "Please, don't cry. Everything will be alright."

"I'm tired," you whispered. "Im in pain, I'm scared, and I don't know what I want. I don't know what to do."

"You're hurt?"

You nodded. "I fell."

Shan Yu sighed. How he wanted to just touch you. Hold you in his arms. Clean the trace of tears on your face. See where you hurted yourself. "We will come back to our carriage, we'll eat and rest. And when you're fine, you can decide If you go back home."

It was so dumb. So stupid. You could help but laugh, almost forgeting the tears. "And you would let me go if I want to?"

"I want to feel your love, not to see your disgust." Shan Yu sighed. "If you want to go, you can. But when i defeat the Emperor, when China became mine, I'll come back to you. And then I'll ask you once more if you want to be mine."

"You promise?" You didn't knew what to think about this.

"I do," Shan Yu answered. "Sadly, I do."

• That was the first night of a thunderstorm that lasted days. That was the first night of a thunderstorm that would make Shan Yu fall. That was the first night of a thunderstorm that would change your mind.

Next Part!

GENERAL TAGLIST: @suakemi @notanalienindisguiseblink

if you enjoyed, please reblog! i promise it makes a difference ♡

@ madwomansapologist.tumblr.

[sillygoosealert]

UUUUUH SAD ANGST SAD ANGST IDEA

Terminally Ill reader who doesn’t treat it and hides it from Bi-Han because he’ll think it’s weakness, and he’s super hard on them for being ‘lazy’ until one day he wakes up to them cold beside him in bed (Bi-Han pov for extra angst)

STOP THIS INES GETTING TO ME

Are you ignoring me? Answer me..

Bi-han angst, no comfort

It’s 4:00 in the morning, it’s time to get up

However, you have trouble even processing that

It's like you’re in rim sleep- 24/7

This upsets Bi-Han greatly, as his spouse, you should be better than this

And he lets you know this

Every day

And every time he sees you

After his habit of nit-picking started, you looked even more exhausted 

He would feel pity and let you take a break- if you hadn't started to slack off

Maybe you thought he didn't notice when you stopped to go dry heave for a minute and then continue

Or when you sat down for a minute after only an hour or two of work

He did.

And he wasn't thrilled about the whispers and looks not only you, but he got after you started

Most of them were indifferent- or pitiful

And he hated that

People were pitting you for no reason, not one good enough at least

When you got to your room that night, he snapped

‘Do you know what I saw today?’ he hisses, furrowing his eyebrows

‘No, what did you see hun?’ you are whispering, not sure what he's mad at- or who he’s mad at

‘You sitting down, while on duty’ now he’s fuming, he can’t help when he gets mad. He has his fathers rage

‘I had to take a moment to rest, it isn’t easy working for hours at a time’ You look tired, you’re pale, skin sunken in around your eyes

He noticed, but he noticed other people just like doing their work too

‘Are you pregnant?’

‘What? No, I would tell you if I was pregnant.’ you look..upset? If anyone should be upset it should be him

‘Then you have no excuse. Nothing is stopping you from doing your work.’

You don't say anything as you reach for the door

‘Where are you going?’

‘I’m not sleeping with you tonight.’

He says nothing as you leave

The next day he sees you, yet says nothing

He's too busy anyways

You come back to your room that night, you're actually there before he arrives

Pathetic

He says nothing as you shiver and cough and wheeze

‘I love you’

He hears you whisper not long after he gets into bed

‘Get some rest, I know you need it’

That was his way of saying it back, you knew it

He was far from pleased with your recent performance- but he would never let you think he didn't love you

‘Can you say it back?’

‘Why? We've talked about this before..’

He has told you he isn't fond of saying it

It isn't him

‘Goodnight Bi-Han.’

You're ignoring his question

He doesn't know why, and it upsets him

So he turns away from you as he closes his eyes and eventually falls asleep

When he wakes up and turns to you, your back is facing him

He shakes you gently

But no response

So he shakes you a little harder

No response

‘You have to get up today, I'll give you a few more minutes but that's it.’

After he dresses he goes back for you

‘I know you're awake, and I know you're upset..’

He cares about you, he really does. He wants to pour his heart out every time he has the pleasure of holding you in his arms

He wants to say ‘i love you’ every night and every morning, to make sure you remembered

He wants to start a family with you, and hold you close when you are with child- with his child

And he wants to tell you that

But he won't, or maybe he just can't

‘And we can talk about it later, however we have to get up’

You don't even move to look at him

‘Are you ignoring me?’

Maybe he should understand- give you space and time

But he doesn't understand, he didn't do anything in his eyes

‘Answer me. Are you ignoring me?’

The silence is loud and he stomps over to the bed, forcefully turning you over

Tears stain your cheeks as your eyes are glazed over

An empty look for a once-radiant person

Then he lets go of your cold, lifeless body

There is nothing left in you

It's gone- everything is gone and the world isn't spinning anymore

He isn't breathing

Or blinking

He's just staring

He didn't even realize he was backing up until he backed into a wall

Then he goes to the bed a checks for a pulse

Nothing

He picks up your body and cradles it

His own tears now staining your face

He knows he couldn't have changed you dying

Well, maybe he could have

But he really wishes you knew he at least cared about you

But you didn't

And you never would

🎀

[yanderes-galore]

Could you do a romantic Naoya Zen'in with a female!sorceror!reader please! Thank you!

Oh he's going to be such an asshole... so I hope you know what you're expecting- I'm on Chapter 143, so some info may be wrong.

Possible JJK Manga Spoilers within this for chapters after where the anime (Season 2) leaves off!

Yandere! Naoya Zenin with Female Sorcerer! Darling

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Female Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Controlling behavior, Sexism, Condescending/Degrading behavior, Possessive behavior, Attempted forced marriage/courting, Stalking, Violence, Blood, Murder, Toxic masculinity, Threats, Forced relationship.

You just know he's going to be horrible to deal with due to his family's principles.

The Zenin family canonically has sexist views, seeing women as just wives.

This is seen with Maki and Mai in the series, Naoya's language only confirms it.

It's canon that he views women as wives and thinks if they aren't three paces behind a man, they should be stabbed in the back (Actual quote, you wish I was joking.)

So it's safe to say Naoya is going to be hell.

He's such an entitled brat, tone and behavior often dripping in arrogance.

He would refuse to see you as skilled.

Being around Naoya as a female Jujutsu Sorcerer often comes with... comments.

Comments literally no one asked for.

Naoya would be degrading and condescending towards you.

He'd often view you as weak.

You could never measure up to him in a battle.

Like he did with Maki and Mai, he likes to break you down.

But here's the worst part.

Naoya would be the type of person to bully you because he likes you.

He definitely finds himself wanting your attention, so he'll get it in any way he can.

It's so easy to hate him, he doesn't even mind all that much at first.

Naoya would hunt you down just to mess with you.

At first it's just because he finds your goals to be stronger preposterous.

Although... before he even realizes it, he may follow you because he finds you attractive.

He likes that you're strong for a woman and might even see you as good wife material.

Naoya stalks you around, watching you kill Curses before stepping in to essentially steal the glory.

It's like in some twisted way he's trying to impress you.

Naoya treats you like you can't do anything alone.

He acts like he should be the man in your life.

He's so possessive... he thinks he owns you.

If he doesn't, he knows he will at some point.

Naoya is a nuisance to you due to both his beliefs... and the growing attraction he has.

You hate his guts... but Naoya feels he can't live without your attention.

He loves it when you look at him, he loves it when you react to him, he finds it cute when you fight him.

He believes he is leagues above you in power... yet adores you all the same.

Naoya would definitely put you down, then try to pull you into relying on him.

He tells you you're weak on your own... that you need him in your life.

In reality, it's the other way around.

Naoya feels he needs you.

However, Naoya is a prideful man and would never want to admit to that.

Naoya would often claim himself to be your man, be that boyfriend or husband.

In fact, Naoya may just jump straight into husband territory.

He's unwilling to believe you have any other choice.

Hate his guts? Sure... but you'll be married someday in his eyes.

He hates it when you disobey him to make him upset.

You want nothing to do with him, you want to be a Jujutsu Sorcerer without Naoya breathing down your neck.

Naoya is a Sorcerer who quickly turns to violence to get what he wants.

In the manga we see him quickly deciding to kill Megumi and Yuji to become head of the Zenin clan.

Imagine if you had a suitor already? Y'know... one who supports your career?

Naoya won't stand for that.

I can see Naoya stalking you until seeing your lover, only to confront them.

As I said, he feels he's the only man and partner for you.

So Naoya would probably kill them... with no regrets... in front of you.

The blood covering his clothes means nothing to him.

All that matters is making you his.

He's such a hypocrite, telling you to rely on him as if you need him.

You're capable on your own, but it's like he refuses to see that.

He wants you to listen to his every order, to beg to be with him.

In reality he's projecting, wanting to do that to you yet his pride won't let him.

At some point he gives in to the fact he loves you.

He loves you, he needs you, why can't you obey him?

The fact you're a woman who won't listen to him breaks him at times.

Yet he's determined to make you his wife.

It doesn't matter what you think of him...

Naoya is a selfish entitled brat who's used to getting what he wants.

He knows at some point he'll get you.

It doesn't matter how much blood he spills to make it happen... or if he has to break you mentally.

He'll make you his... his perfect little wife... who needs him as much as he needs you.

Naoya could drag you into his arms kicking and screaming, the blood on his clothes staining your skin as he grins down at you.

He doesn't care if he has to drag you to your wedding bound.

Naoya knows he'll have you... that you'll be his and you'll give him strong heirs...

You'll learn your role like every other woman in his clan... forced to stay by his side like the good wife he knows you are.

[heartsforkento]

you do not have to push anything away + school or work and shifting + shifting challenge/exercise

(3-in-1 post let's go)

rin is back again.

long post ahead !!

section one: you do not have to push anything away

section two: school/work and shifting

section three: the shifting/loa exercise

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"run away to the other side of the world"

"

ONE

this is a continuation of my previous post, stating that you do not have to do so much to shift, because shifting simply is easy.

but first, let me relate this topic to my life. i remember first learning about shifting. it was in the middle of exam season. i would spend nearly my whole day just researching and researching about shifting and then, i would not do my work at all lol. in my past self's mind, shifting was this big deal and it was my priority and i'm supposed to spend time learning more and more about it because that is the only way i'll shift.

bitch no??

see, it's okay to treat shifting like a priority, because it may be. but, did i really have to push everything away, just to shift? no ! not at all.

i remember just completely ignoring my work, my family and friends because i had to "disconnect from my CR" to reach my DR. and there was no need for this because i eventually shifted with the LOA haha.

see, i'm not saying that obsessing over shifting won't make you shift or that you'll have to do your schoolwork to shift. no no no !!

all i'm saying is it's not necessary to spend long hours researching about the best shifting method or whatever, because there is none. they're all equally good lol.

there is no need to push anything away just to shift.

you don't have to spend too much time researching nor you do have to "make time" for it. you do not have to push away your work or anything just for shifting.

it's like having a true best friend. your bff is not going to leave you just because you don't text them every hour of the day. your bff is not going to tell you to drop all your other best friends just to be with them. no. because they are an ordinary human like everyone else. i hope you're getting the analogy.

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"to fill my heart to the top"

TWO

now, what do you do if you have school and cannot spend time doing methods because you have to wake up early or you just have so much to do during the day that you just do not have time?

i'm exactly like this and that is why i will always stand by the law of assumption.

but first, it's important to understand that having so much work doesn't disable you from shifting. do not feel sorry that you weren't able to do methods or listen to your subliminals. it's okay.

i have an extremely busy schedule haha. yet i still shifted amidst the chaos.

who said you can't shift in such situations?

i know how discouraging school can be, and it can affect one's mindset, and that may affect what you feel about yourself and shifting. it is okay to feel that way.

now, what if i told you that when applying the Law, you are not obligated to think about shifting 24/7. with this, we'll be moving on to the final part of this post.

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"like you're short of breath,"

THREE

i was scrolling through reddit when i came across this post: here !! it seemed like a really good method to shift using intention and hence, i've added it to this shifting exercise so credits to them for the idea !!

anyway, let's get into it.

what i want you to do is first set up some basic rules. i believe this will make you more confident !! you can just say them once in your head. here are mine:

i am in control of my reality

i only associate with my positive thoughts

negative thoughts and doubts have no control over me

intrusive/impulsive thoughts have no control over me

my manifestations are quick

then, we will start by applying the LOA, if you want you can refer to my other post about it.

what we'll do next is do SATS once, and know and accept that your desire is already yours. you don't have to do it again if you don't want to. but if you do want to, then go ahead.

then, we state that every time we blink, we affirm that we are in our DR. or you could pick a certain word, like maybe 'lilac' and attach a meaning to it, like "i am in my DR", and then go on repeating it in your head.

if thoughts of your DR or shifting arises, you can affirm or do SATS once. this also goes for opposing thoughts, you flip them around. you don't have to keep thinking about shifting too much. it's already been taken care of right?

then go about your day as normal, do what you have to do knowing it has already happened. have fun and take care of yourself, knowing that your subconscious has your back.

thank you for reading, my loves !!

"you give me purpose."

until next time,

rin.