#an ounce of vulnerability

[se-hace-camino]

the film & the photo

blessed to have artsy friends who think of me

and now I have this artsy n00d

homenaje a gal costa, rip

[noxexistant]

“remove all mentions of ‘crip/cripple’ from newsies” is quite literally the worst take i have ever seen and i am not exaggerating

[bbnibini]

This is probably just me starved for Solomon content, but I kept on wondering if the reason for Solomon's absence in the main story is intentional? In lesson 18 normal side story, Barbatos questions why Solomon suggested MC to go to the House of Lamentation when it's pretty obvious he's not taking their absence so well, and he said, it's the "mature thing" to do, causing the demon who is supposed to hate his guts to even worry about him.

In Lesson 11, we don't even have a choice to listen to him or side with him. MC was just given the option to give the book to Lucifer. In the later lessons, you don't get any options to decline the brothers when "it's about time to go back to Cocytus Hall".

The daily chats in NB have at least an explanation for this since you live together with him, but in the OG, he texts you the least amongst the other dateable characters. Which kinda contradicts what is explained on the daily chats in the first place because if you are away in Cocytus Hall for long periods of time because the brothers insist for you to stay with them longer, wouldn't that give him a reason to text you more?

I'm starting to think that Solomon is intentionally keeping his distance after all that happened in the main story. He loves you with all his heart, and trusts you enough to share a bit of his past with you, but after the past lessons, he may be at the stage where he's trying to...go back to his old self again. Where he doesn't rely on anyone as much. Where he can be depended on and be your most trusted ally and your dearest friend, but he must, at all circumstances, not show a portion of his heart again, no matter how much he loves the other person. That isn't to say he wouldn't reciprocate the same way, but he can only take what is given and should NOT expect anything more.

Because he's been proven right and right again when he finds out the hard way that people would only accept the "him" that would fit their narrative. That he was born unlike any other, so he must walk his path alone, even if it seems like the small intersection he found with you was the solace he needed to colour his jadedness. But that's all there is to it. You are just a small intersection. A short-lived dream containing his ideals and expectations. You would always be your own person, and he would rather have that because he loves you and he wants you to be happy.

Because you had a choice. And he knew you would never choose him. So he must silence the small part of himself that told him "He will never be alone again."

[itspileofgoodthings]

Taylor’s voice has so many strengths but I also love the limits of it. it’s where all the emotions live.

[gayhoediaz]

call it childhood trauma or whatever but i'm weak as fuck for storylines where a couple meets an angry teenager and goes "anyway we're your parents now i guess cause no one else seems to be doing it"

bonus points if one half of the couple is like "we're NOT getting involved!" and the other one is like 🥺👉👈

[zo1nkss]

I do hate Izzy and I'm sorry to be the one to say it but I also think he's hilariously repressed his own inner joy to the point of being entirely the cause of his own misery and thats just so funny to me.

I get why ppl wanna sympathize with him so much but my God I just wanna slap him full across the face and scream "TAKE A DICK OR SHUT THE FUCK UP OH MY GOD" because seriously this man has given himself such intense blue balls that he's starting to make ME feel weird.

[sinnershavesoulstoo]

I look at you and it hurts My bones are tender, my heart is raw, my soul aches I waste the day hoping for more time to be with you To be in your presence, to feel the warmth of your body when we're close, to gently brush up against one another unexpectedly.

My bones are tender, my heart is raw, my soul aches I waste the day imagining a future with you To be held, and loved, and cherished, to know what safety truly is when we're alone, to be intertwined - not just with our bodies, but our souls.

My bones are tender, my heart is raw, my soul aches I waste the day replaying conversations with you To be told you'd be lost without me, to hear such soft and sincere praise when we're laughing, to wish you'd say more, mean more.

My bones are tender, my heart is raw, my soul aches I waste the day breaking my own heart, because I'm in love with you. To be alone, and hopeless, and scared, to realize this is all one sided after all, to lose the last bit of hope I held onto and to finally fall apart.

[mihotose]

[tenebriism]

They bring him a dagger with his name engraved on it and precious jewels. All for his birthday. -Diluc // local viking appears before u with gift

He appreciates the gifts... always does, always will, even if he really, truly does not need them ( though, he'll make generous use of this dagger -- it's beautiful, and sure to slice better, DEEPER, than the ones currently in his collection that have dulled with use and time ), but the way he looks at Eivor, it's evident he desires something far more on a day like this. He hasn't slept a wink in the days leading up to this, and hasn't had the appetite to attempt more than a few slices of dry toast and a sip of coffee, here and there. He doesn't need gifts, he doesn't need repetitive, recycled affirmations that ' it gets easier, time heals all wounds, ' because it damn well does not...

Diluc just needs... company. A presence. He reaches out for Eivor, tentative in the gesture, and cannot look them in the eye; HE FEELS PATHETIC, but he doesn't want them to go, and silently pleads, in the way he steps just that tiny bit closer, for them to stay. The two of them needn't even do much of anything... they can sit and watch the leaves sway, or watch the bugs skitter across the dirt.

" Stay... ? If... you are able... "

Just for a little bit... so he can say he enjoyed something nice today...

@wolfkcst ;;

[harmonizewithechoes]

.

[se-hace-camino]

an ounce of vulnerability

While coming down from a 10hr long acid trip I tried my best to go to sleep and instead my mind's eye spelled it out as clear as day that my heart was still very much wrapped up in the ambiguously sapphic situationship all lesbians find themselves in during their teenage years.

Funny enough next time I would see said ambiguously sapphic friend, I ended up getting too drunk, getting overly competitive, breaking 1.5 of my own teeth and thus ruining the plans we had made to have dinner after not having seen one another in 3yrs.

The next morning, I bandage my face up and walk the 3mi to her place. When I get there I almost lose my nerve to ring the doorbell but I finally work up the courage. When she opens the door the look of concern was immediately upon her and with an outstretched hand she almost reaches for my face but stops just shy of contact and instead scans a careful gaze over my features. She invites me upstairs and introduces me to her boyfriend. It hurt but due more to my own lack of candor.

The years following my broken teeth and broken heart, I give dating men a shot. It was very much the same attitude I approached college with, and in similar fashion I'd say I passed heterosexuality with a "C" I learned that while I am capable of loving a man it came with an oftentimes burdensome feeling of a chore.

Come pandemic times and I learn that there really is only so much sex can do to maintain a relationship when the world is crumbling all around. Worse yet my dreams become infiltrated by the stress and anxiety of waking life and lo and behold she's the one I'm trying to get to and be with in my apocalyptic nightmares--at this point I haven't spoken to or seen her in maybe 4yrs. I would become especially upset at my mind for choosing to pine over a shadow of person vs my own mother who was fighting cancer at the time. What the actual fuck.

Fast forward to 2022, I came out to myself, close friends and family, unfortunately my mother passed but I got to share my truth before she transitioned. I'm writing a lot about everything and I made peace with the fact that I was pining after a fleeting memory of an old flame. And what do you know, guess who invites me to their small intimate wedding after having no contact for 5yrs. What little footing I had quickly fell from underneath me. 3 weeks later I showed up very late to the reception and stayed for the last hour. She married the guy I met after i broke my teeth.

She text me a couple of weeks later and asks to hang out. We have to reschedule a few times but the day before Halloween we meet up to kick the soccer ball around just like when we 1st started getting to know each other. We talk and eat, it feels like no time has passed at all, like we had just picked up an old routine. But at some point there's a lull that lasts a little too long and the transition between the songs seemed eternal--I almost formed the words "you know I was in love with you right?" but I can't do it so instead I just tell her about how my mom passed.

Fortunately I had plans later that night so I had an excuse to cut our reunion short. We made plans to meet again but its been a good 7 months and we keep missing each other, maybe its for the best. That day I found out that some things are better left unsaid.

[palebirdqueen]

Tw abuse, self harm..

Thinking about how someone could believe they are entirely innocent when they would threaten suicide on multiple occasions if I wanted to break up with them, I felt trapped. Oh, “I can't finish school if you leave me; I can't live without you,” etc., the time I hung out with a friend, and she picked me up from her house and told me it made her feel like she wanted to die. I tried to apologize for the entire ride where we were looking for food, and we pulled over in a McDonald's parking lot, and then she started freaking out on me and banging her head on the steering wheel. This is not the only time this fucking happened; too, she did this in a Target parking lot when I mentioned therapy for us cause I seriously did love her despite everything. I wanted to make this work like there's so much that happened that I don't even talk about the cause. Personally, it's tough, and I blamed myself for so so long. I apologized a million times because (people pleaser). However, bro, she messed me up so bad I am still scared to open up to someone new in a relationship since I'm afraid they're not being authentic. She seemed like she genuinely loved me but then turned into someone I don't even recognize, but anyway, she makes me sick!

[sourkitsch]

My school has a bsu but no jsu because there are five of us I’ve met them all and one is a professor who sat on my thesis approval panel like there’s no safety in numbers here. What numbers. David Ross jewless Boston moment.

[angel-beloved]

Okay I am sorry I was an emotional wreck it won't happen again

[unhinged-comics-screaming]

Oh shit green blorbos

[noneofusareverno]

I really don’t even know what to say rn I stfg please lobotomize me I’m being so fucking fr:))))))):)):6:6:6:6:)6:$;$&,666