#and 'i'll wait for bus 2 i hope he won't be long'

[machidielontheway]

thank you to the bus driver who saw me running as he passed by me and waited at the stop ahead, EVEN THOUGH NO ONE GOT OFF AT THIS STOP. He even let the door open i guess so i'd get he was waiting for me. True king may he have a blessed 20th of may every year.

[heli-writes]

Seven summers, part 6.

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x female!reader

Summary: Every summer, Draco and y/n meet. First, by pure coincidence, then intentionally. Unbeknown to Draco, y/n's a muggle who has no clue he's a wizard. With the rise of the dark lord, how long can this go well?

Disclaimers: Make-out session, allusion to sex, no full-on smut (they're still minors, y'all!)

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6

Series Masterlist

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Sixth summer, July.

The weather in England has been cold and rainy lately. It doesn't seem to be July at all. Y/n longs for those warm, long summer nights outside in her parents' garden, playing cards and drinking bubbly lemonade. Instead, she's clinging to her umbrella and making herself as small as possible so that she doesn't give the wind too much space to attack her with its whipping water. She's waiting for Draco near the entrance of Diagon Alley. She watched several wizards enter and leave the place, but no Draco so far. Y/n wonders if he will actually show up. They've been exchanging letters via owl, as usual. At the beginning of the school year, Draco's letters have been arriving quite frequently but there were less and less letters the last few months. Y/n knows there's been some arguments with his rival Harry and a new teacher. Draco was appointed a certain position in a Club or something. He didn't really tell her what's it about but ever since he's been more reserved than before.

Y/n waits for almost an hour before she gives up. She walks through the pouring rain back to the bus stop. She stops by a Costa and treats herself to a hot cup of tea on the go in an attempt to warm herself up. On the bus, she plugs in her headphones and stares out of the window. She tries really hard not to cry and hopes that none of the other passengers notice th water dwelling in her eyes. When she gets off the bus, her head's pounding from the oppressing of tears. Y/n walks straight home and up to her room, without taking off her jacket and boots. She can hear her mother complaining about the water on the floor, but she doesn't care. She's just dropped onto her bed when she hears the soft clank of Draco's owl on her window. Y/n gets up and sniffs. This guy has some nerve, she tells herself as she walks up to the window. She takes the letter from the owl and throws some dried meat in its direction, a habit she picked up a while ago. She leans back on a chair and reads.

Dear y/n,

I won't be able to make it today. I'm really sorry but there have been some issues in my family recently and my mother needs my support. I hope the whole situation dissolves itself soon.

I'll send you a letter when it's possible to meet again. I hope you can understand.

Draco.

Y/n folds up the letter and puts it in a box beneath her bed where she keeps all of Draco's letters. She writes a quick response and hands it to the owl who is patiently waiting outside. She watches the owl fly away. I must've just missed his message, y/n thinks. Yet still she can't shake the feeling that something is off.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Draco lets y/n wait for two weeks. Y/n got antsy with every passing day without hearing from him. Eventually, he sends her a letter and proposes a meeting in Windsor Great Park for a stroll and coffee. Y/n is nervous all morning and has to redo her makeup twice after ruining her eyeliner. Again, y/n is the first to arrive. She walks up and down the entrance of the Savill Garden.

"Hey", she suddenly hears behind her. Draco is standing right next to her with a loopy grin on his face. It doesn't reach his eyes, y/n thinks. She smiles at him nonetheless and opens her arms to hug him. Almost hesitantly, Draco hugs her back. It's a bit awkward. "Do you want to go inside?", y/n says and points to the garden. Draco nods. They take the tourist route but there aren't many other people around. It's probably because of the grey clouds that hang low above their heads. They walk along the path between rows of bushes and other plants.

Draco doesn't make an attempt to start a conversation, so y/n does. "So, how's your family? Everything alright? Your letter sounded quite serious.", y/n asks him. Draco shrugs and doesn't answer immediately. "I guess, we're alright. Things haven't been resolved but it will be ok.", he tells her. Y/n nods reassuringly but she feels that Draco does not really believe that last part. "If you don't mind me asking... what happened?", she asks carefully. Draco kicks a stone out of his way. "My dad has been involved in some stuff. He's temporarily contained.", he tells her. Y/n stares at him with big eyes. "Like jail?", she blurts. Draco gives her an angry look. "Yes. My mother did not take it too well.", he replies. "Oh.", is all that y/n manages to say. They walk in silence for a moment. "What about you? How do you take it?", she asks him. Draco shrugs again and does his best to look somewhere far ahead. "Draco...", y/n mumbles and touches his arm. "I'm fine.", he says harshly, "My mother needs all the support she can get. I can't be weak in a situation like this". Y/n steps a bit closer to him and rests her cheek on his arm while taking his hand. "It's not a weakness to feel bad about a situation like that. It only shows how much you care about your parents.", she tells him. Almost instantly, she can feel Draco's shoulders slump down. He turns to her and finally pulls her close. He hides his face in her hair. "I must do everything I can to clear my family's name. One way or another.", he points out. Y/n thinks about this for a moment. "It's not your responsibility. Support your family as much as you can, but don't let the weight of it pull you down.", she replies. Draco shakes his head. "You don't understand... my mother...", he starts. "...is an adult. We're only sixteen, Draco. There's only so much we can do. Somethings we must let the adults handle.", she points out. Draco shakes his head again. "No, my mother can't handle this. I'm the one who has to fix things. I've been chosen.", he tells her. Y/n frowns. "Chosen? By whom? For what?", she asks him. Draco lets go of her. "It doesn't matter. The point is I'm going to handle this. Don't worry.", he says coldly. Draco walks a bit ahead and y/n stares after him. She's got a really bad feeling about this but it's clear that Draco isn't ready to talk about this.

She jogs after him. "Alright, let's not talk about this anymore. We haven't seen each other since Christmas and I really am happy we're spending time together today.", she announces and gives him a bright smile. She holds out her hand to Draco and looks at him expectantly. Draco sighs and then takes her hand. They continue their stroll and y/n tries to distract Draco with silly stories about school and her friends. She updates him on Olivia's situationship and manages to pry some stories about Blaze and quidditch out of Draco. The atmosphere loosens up a bit and soon she finds Draco genuinely smiling again. They wander deeper into the garden and don't notice how the clouds above them get darker and darker. They're laughing about one of y/n's stories when the first drop landed on y/n's cheek. Draco wipes it away carefully. They look up and notice how armageddon is right above them. Within seconds, it's pouring. Draco pulls her close and uses his wand as an umbrella. However, the wind whips raindrops onto their sides. They rush along the path, deeper into the rows of trees ahead of them. They're almost soaked when they finally find shelter in a stone pavilion.

Y/n is shivering but glad there are still some parts of her that are dry. Draco sits down next to her and puts an arm around her. Y/n nuzzles closer into his side. Draco leans his head against hers. They don't speak and when y/n finally looks up, she immediately meets Draco's gaze. He must've been staring at her for a while now. Immediately, he leans close and they meet in a kiss. For a moment, everything outside the pavilion seems to stop existing. Y/n kisses him back feverishly and grabs his collar. Draco's hand is tangled in her hair and his other hand wanders down her side. Y/n presses her upper body closer to his and Draco pulls her onto his lap. They kiss until they can't breathe anymore. Y/n leans her forehead against his as both of them catch their breath. There are no sounds besides the pouring rain outside.

"Draco?", y/n breathes. "Hm?", he mumbles in response. Y/n's heart leaps in her chest. It takes all her courage to say: "I think I love you". Draco leans back and looks at her with surprise in his eyes. Clearly, he didn't expect a confession of love. Immediately, y/n feels embarrassed. She wishes she could take the words back. "Y-you don't have to say it back. I just thought...", she rumbles but doesn't get to finish her sentence. Draco puts his hand onto the back of her head and pulls her lips against his again. He gives her a deep, longing kiss which leaves y/n breathless once again. When he lets go of her, he looks at her longingly and strokes over her cheek. Then he presses a kiss on top of her head and pulls her into a hug. Y/n feels warm and fuzzy inside and she almost forgets that Draco did not return the confession.

They stay in the pavilion until the heavy rain fades into a soft summer drizzle. Only then, they start wandering back to the entrance of the garden. They part ways rather quickly since the rain started again after some point. However, y/n proposes that he should come visit her soon. Her parents will be visiting her grandparents all the way up in Keswick and will be gone for a couple of days. They put y/n under house arrest for the time being (considering what happened last year), but allowed to have a friend over. They probably thought about Olivia but when y/n asked her, Olivia immediately declined saying that y/n simply must invite Draco. Draco is a bit hesitant to accept the invitation and says that he will have to see how things at home. They both decide to write soon.

On her way back to the train station, y/n has mixed feelings. On one hand she's over the moon about meeting Draco finally again, on the other hand, she's also worried about him. Having a father in jail is already troubling but it sounded as if Draco was ready to do anything to fix that. She wonders if that included more than giving a testimony in front of a court. One way or another, he said. She hopes Draco is smart enough to not do anything stupid, or illegal.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Sixth summer, a few weeks later.

Anxious. That's how y/n feels as she waits for Draco at King's Cross. Y/n and Draco have been writing back and forth for the last couple of weeks. Draco's been really quiet about his father's situation and y/n didn't push too much. However, whenever y/n brought up Draco coming over, he kept saying it probably wouldn't be possible and that too many things were going on. Which clearly indicates that things haven't been resolved. Surprisingly, Draco sent her a letter a few days ago saying that meeting her would be possible after all. Apparently, his mother and his aunt visit a family friend, giving him a chance to slip away. When y/n got Draco's letter saying that he would be visiting after all, she immediately called Olivia who immediately rushed over. Giggling, they wrote lists and prepared the house for what y/n's parents assumed was a sleepover. It also leads to her parents being quite relaxed about leaving y/n alone for a few days.

Right now, y/n is waiting for Draco to arrive at King's Cross. Obviously, Draco does not take a muggle train. He arrives via floo powder somewhere close but they agreed to meet at the station from where y/n would take him home. Y/n nervously scans the crowd in front of her. Suddenly, she feels a tap on her shoulder. "Hey, there pretty girl.", she hears Draco say behind her. When she twirls around, he is mere inches from her face. "Draco!", she laughs and throws her arms around him. Draco almost drops his bag while trying to keep his balance. Y/n quickly retreats. "Sorry!", she says. Draco puts down his bag. "That's alright.", he tells her and pulls her close by her arms. He hugs her close and hides his face in her hair. Y/n's heart skips a beat. When he lets go of her, he looks over his shoulder nervously. Distractedly, he says: "So, uh... is your house close by?". Y/n tries to see what's behind him or what he's looking for but when he turns back to her, she gives him a bright smile. "We'll have to take the bus.", she tells him and takes his hand. Draco sighs behind her. "You don't happen to have a fireplace, do you?", he mumbles. Y/n laughs. "No, sorry! We have central heating.", she says as she pulls him along with him.

While Draco feels visibly nervous in the station, he relaxes once y/n and him have entered the bus. When y/n asks him why, he tells her that there are probably no wizards here who could see them. Y/n nods understandingly. It's a short walk from the bus station to y/n's house. Her house is one of these terraced houses with white, wooden windows and a small front garden. It's nothing special really but her parents had to save up for it for quite some time and they're really proud to call themselves 'homeowners'. Y/n thinks it's a bit ridiculous but then again she's never bought a house and doesn't even know how much it would cost. Y/n pulls out her keys and opens the door.

She holds the door for Draco. "Ladies first. You can put your shoes over there.", she tells him as she quickly pushes him inside. Ever since they made a turn into y/n's street, she's been the one looking over her shoulder. Can't have the neighbours see her sneaking a boy in. She's pretty sure that the nosy old lady from across the street would just love to tell her parents all about that. Y/n quickly closes the door behind her and pulls off her jacket. Draco is standing in the hallway looking around and feeling a bit out of place. Y/n points past him. "Go on, straight through that door. There's the kitchen", she tells him. They enter the kitchen together and y/n quickly puts the kettle on. "C'mon.", she tells him and leads him to the room to the right. It's the living room which has a small conservatory attached to it. It's her mother's favorite room since it's always bright and open. In the middle, there's a large couch with pillows and blankets. On the left is the telly and a coffee table. "It's cozy", Draco notes as y/n leads him to the coach. "Sit down. I'll make the tea.", she tells him as she rushes off back to the kitchen.

She prepares a tray with tea, mugs and some biscuits. When she enters the living room again, Draco still sits in the same position as she left him. I guess he feels a bit awkward, she concludes. After she pours him a cup of tea, she asks him: "So, what do you think? Is this how you imagined muggles to live like?". Draco laughs and rubs his head in embarrassment. "Actually, I'm not sure what I expected. But it's really nice. I like this room.", he says and points to the conservatory. Y/n pulls one of her legs under the other and takes her tea cup. "Hm, you really had no image in your head how I live like?", she asks. Draco shakes his head. "How do you imagine I live like then?", he replies. Y/n thinks about that for a moment. "I guess I imagine a big house, maybe a villa. An old one, maybe Victorian? I imagine a big staircase right when you enter. Old, but classic and high-quality furniture.", she explains. Draco looks at her surprised. "That's actually not that far off.", he tells her. "I can't imagine your room though. I feel like I can imagine your dorm room better than your room at home.", she says. Draco takes a sip from his tea. "Do you want me to describe it?", he asks her. Y/n nods excitedly. He crooks his head. "Let's see. My room is upstairs, in the East Wing. It has a window facing the East as well so that I can see the sunrise every morning. My walls are painted in a greyish-blue. My furniture is black. When you enter the room, you're standing in front of my bed. Opposite the bed is the window and in front of it is my desk. To the left of the desk, is my wardrobe which is always messy and to the right are some shelves with books.", he describes. Y/n tries to imagine the room. In her head, the room is kind of empty besides the furniture Draco described. "Is there anything else in the room?", she asks. Draco names some quidditch equipment and some other tokens that y/n has trouble imagining. Draco tried to explain quidditch to her one time but y/n fails to truly understand the game. Probably, because she's never seen a person riding a broom.

"Would you like to see my room?", y/n proposes and Draco nods. They walk back to the hallway and up the stairs that are on the left. "My room is all the way up, beneath the roof.", she tells him as they climb up the stairs. Y/n's room is the only room on the last floor. When she opens the room, there's her bed to the left and behind the door is her closet. Right in front of the door are three windows. In front of the middle one, is her desk. On the left is a little reading niche and on the right is a dressing table and a cupboard. A chain of lights is strung from one side of the room towards another. Y/n makes some space for Draco to enter. He looks around the room in silence. "So, what do you think?", she asks. "It suits you. I don't know how I'd imagine your room but this fits you perfectly.", he tells her. Y/n giggles and drops onto her bed. "You think so?", she says. Draco nods and turns around in her room before joining her on the bed. Y/n thinks the sight of him in her room is a bit strange. Like he doesn't quite fit into it. He's dressed in black (like always) and her room is dominated by beige and pastel tones. "Yeah, it's bright and warm. And girly. And cozy.", he replies. Y/n snuggles up to him. "You like it?", she asks him. Draco pulls her closer to him. "Yes. Actually, I like your whole house. Everything is very home-ly.", he murmurs and kisses the top of her head. He pulls her back and they fall on top of the comforter of y/n's bed. Draco turns to his side, pulling her closer to him. Y/n takes in his scent and puts her head on his chest, just beneath his head. Draco's hand finds its way into y/n's hair and he scratches the skin of her skull a bit. Y/n feels how the three magical words lay heavy on her tongue again, begging her to speak them out loud once more. She swallows them down quickly, however. She doesn't want to make a fool out of herself once again.

They lay there for a while and y/n is not sure whether or not she may have dozed off a bit. The room's colour faded to grey indicating that the sun was about to go down. Draco stretches next to her and sits up. "Are you hungry?", y/n asks him. Draco shrugs but y/n knows him well enough that that means yes. They end up ordering pizza and watching y/n's favourite movie. Setting up the telly, Draco is fascinated by the technology and asks a bunch of questions about how it works without magic which y/n definitely can't answer. She lets Draco choose a movie afterwards and they spend the evening rotting on the couch. Eventually, the titles roll and y/n sits up stretching. She peeks over to Draco whose eyes are closed. Did he really fall asleep?, she thinks and pokes his cheek. He wrinkles his nose and opens an eye. "Sleepy? Wanna settle for the night?", y/n asks and Draco yawns and nods. They get up and climb up the stairs to y/n's room. After brushing their teeth, they climb into y/n's bed and Draco pulls her close. Y/n leans her head against his and lets her hand rest on his chest. Draco gently strokes over her back and places soft kisses on her forehead, her cheeks and her nose. Y/n crooks her head and meets him in a soft kiss. It's slow and sweet. Draco puts his hand into her hair and pulls her face closer to him, deepening the kiss. Y/n's heart starts beating faster. They kiss like this for a bit until Draco rolls her over so that y/n lays flat on her back. Draco hovers over her while continuing to kiss her. Y/n puts her hands behind his neck and one of Draco's hands runs up and down her sides. Y/n feels goosebumps forming all over her body. Draco's hand finds the hem of her shirt. His fingers dip under it, softly circling the skin of her hip. He leans his head back for a moment. "Is this okay with you?", he asks. Y/n nods breathlessly, not trusting her voice to say yes. She's expected it to happen tonight. Hell, she kinda hoped it would. Draco pushes his hand under her shirt exploring the warm, naked skin underneath it. Y/n lets her hands run down his back and pulls his shirt up a bit. Draco sits up for a moment and pulls it over his head. Y/n stares up at him in awe. He looks even more pale than usual with the moonlight hitting his skin the way it does at this moment. She sits up a bit and runs her hand down his chest. Draco gently pulls on the neckline of her shirt, silently asking for permission to take it off as well. Y/n swallows. She's nervous. "We don't-", Draco starts but y/n cuts him off by pulling her shirt off as well. Draco doesn't say or do anything for a few seconds. Then he slowly traces a line from her shoulder over her collarbone down to her chest. He leans forward again, kissing her deeply while finally cupping her chest with his hand. Y/n lets herself fall back on the pillow.

She won't worry about anything tonight. Not about her parents or Draco's parents. About whether or not a wizard and a muggle can be together. By the time Draco's hands wander down to her pants, she has forgotten about most of it.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

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[archiveoftara]

Behind the scenes (part 2)

Part 1

Part 3

"Cam, we got a day off"

Impeccable timing Ali.

*Cameron's POV*

"Oh, you're awake. How's your hangover?" Ali gave you a grin.

"My head is still aching. Thanks for bringing me in, mate." Y/n said while scratching her head. Where's my thanks?

"What were you saying earlier?" I asked Ali.

"Ah. Our manager texted me that we have a off day. Change of plans, I guess." He said.

"Why don't we go out? I wanted to visit London for a long time. Can you guys show me around, if that's fine with y'all?" Y/n said in a timid voice.

"Why are you being so formal?" I asked in curiosity.

"I'm just being nice, Chapman." She glared.

"Let's meet at the lobby at 10?" Ali asked.

"Sure." Y/n said and left for her hotel.

"Did you confess?" Ali's eyes sparked at me.

"Thanks to your timing, I couldn't." I sulked.

"Hey, we got all day. We show her around London and when the timing's right I'll give you a signal. You can do this Cam!" He gave me a thumbs up.

I can do this, right?

......................

You got all dressed up in your favourite outfit. You made sure to take your Polaroid camera with you. You were excited to travel visit the city for the first time. You couldn't wait anymore and found yourself in the lobby ahead of schedule. You went to the nearest coffee shop to grab some coffee.

"Ah, it feels so good. This coffee is a bomb."

"Do you always talk to yourself?" You spun around to find a lad in a leather jacket with black jeans, wearing black sunglasses. He looks hot...what is wrong with me?

"Are you done staring?" Cameron smirked at you.

You looked the other way while sipping your coffee.

"Where's Ali?" The atmosphere turned awkward.

"He's still in the shower. I needed some fresh air so I left early." Chapman said. You responded with a nod.

God, this is awkward.

"Y/n, I am sorry." You gave a confused look to the poor boy. Before you could ask him, Ali showed up.

"Hey, sorry I took so long in the shower." He huffed and checked his watch.

"Damn, we're kind of behind schedule. Let's explore and have a great time guys" He said while holding you both in his arms.

"Someone's in a good mood." You muttered to yourself.

"Well why won't I be? It's a bloody day off. I need some quality time with my friends." Ali exclaimed. You grin in response.

At first, The boys took you to the minibus for the city tour. (we call it a double decker bus in our country, I don't know what English people call it. I hope you got the idea. Pardon me, if I'm wrong). The weather was sunny. Ali was cracking jokes and you were having the time of your life.

Then Cameron introduced you to his favourite restaurant. You had a delicious meal which led to a food coma.

After lunch, you found yourself surrounded by celebrities all around the world, of course wax figures. The Madame Tussauds. You saw pictures on social media and dreamt to visit this place before you die.

You couldn't contain your excitement and blurted "this is the best day of my life."

You didn't notice the way Cameron was looking at you. He looked at you with awe and adored every part of you.

You were too busy beaming in joy. You captured those lovely moments in your Polaroid camera.

Lastly, you found yourself sitting on the soft ground near the tower bridge.

The day was ending and the moon was rising above the sky little by little. You were shuffling through your pictures and talking to the lads.

"I'm so hungry. I'm gonna grab some snacks. Do you guys want anything?" Ali announced. You looked up and responded with a no. You carried on with your thoughts.

*Cameron's POV*

Ali gave me a signal and left the scene. Now, it's just me and y/n under the night sky.

"Hey, look here." She said while holding a picture of me and Ali making faces in front of the wax figure. "You guys look so funny, Jesus." She laughed. She seems so happy and pure under the moonlight.

"How was your day, y/n?" I asked her.

"Couldn't be better. The best day in my life, Chapman. When I first came to London, I didn't know a single soul here. I was so scared and felt homesick but you guys really made me feel at home." She said giddily.

Don't give me that look I'll fall for you even harder

"Huh?"

"Huh?"

"Did you say something?" She asked.

"Nothing." I said and got up from the ground.

I gave her a hand and she took it reluctantly.

"Y/n, I've been meaning to tell you this for a really long time." I said.

"Are you okay?" She asked in concern.

My palms were getting sweaty and my heart was beating faster like how I saw her for the first time.

"I like you. I've liked you since the day when we first met for the screen test. I know I've been a prick lately. I treated you awfully. I thought maybe If I make you hate me then I wouldn't have to confront my feelings but I was wrong. I tried to lose these feelings but I can't do it anymore." I poured my heart out to her.

"Cameron, I.. I don't know what to do with these feelings." She frowned.

"You don't have to do anything. I'm happy just the way we are, just the way we're friends. That's all I need. You make me happy, y/n." I look deep into her eyes.

"I thought I lost my friend." She whispered.

"No" guilt was taking over me

"That was a stupid move, Cam." She smirked.

"I'm sorry." I looked down.

Suddenly I felt her arms around me.

"I missed you, Cam." She nuzzles on my neck.

"I missed you too, y/n." I caress her hair.

"HEY, WHERE'S MY HUG?" Ali shouted at us.

We pulled and gave each other a smirk.

Y/n went to Ali and took the snacks from him. She came back to me with snacks in one hand and the other hand holding mine. "Would you like some snacks?" She said in mischief.

"Absolutely." I took her hand and ran.

"GET BACK HERE."

.

.

.

It's safe to say y/n found her old friend back and Cameron doesn't have to hide his feelings anymore.

Do you think y/n will like him back?

Do let me know in the comments.

[schizochasm]

I went to the store.

My mom sent me 100sek less than she said. So I had to cut some stuff and accept that I'll not have money for the rest of the week.

I still got 2 6packs though. Cause if I hadn't I would've been even worse off.

I was supposed to start watching SVU while waiting for the bus, but my friend called. They were very upset, but at least it saved me from watching it.

Rant about him and my life

TW: (sc1de talk, abuser, hopelessness, and just horrific shit tbh. Proceed at your own risk.)

Once I got home I smoked 2 ciggies in the bathroom venting at him. About how I don't even care anymore and if I had the money I wouldn't talk to anyone anymore. And just let go of what I "need to do" to keep my life together. Just isolate and go back to being g drunk 24/7. Cause I just don't care anymore.

And I told him how I feel about him. How much I hate him etc. even though I know he knows. He's in my head. He knows all of what I think and feel. More than I do sometimes.

I just needed it said.

That's when I made my last post.

After that it was time to watch fucking SVU.

And I'm not even through episode 1 and already hate him for it. And myself.

I can't. I can't cope.

I hate myself for getting this way. For being sick. For being schizophrenic.

And for not listening to him when I should've.

I hate him for ruining my entire life ever since I first met him. Especially after I got sicker years ago and he came back.

But everyone keeps saying he's technically me. He's part of me. He's from my brain.

But he may be from my brain. But he's not me. Fuck that. He's not me. He's nothing like me and he's just horrific terrible scum.

Yet I can barely muster being mad at him anymore.

It's been years. Years.

I'm more submitted, broken, and scared than angry.

That anger, fight, and animosity... It's almost all gone...

He broke me long ago.

And it only got worse over time.

I'm not even one cohesive identity anymore. Not to me.

I'm broken.

And people with abusers that "are real" can escape. There's hope. Somewhere in there you might escape. It might end one day.

But me with my "not real" abuser doesn't get that. For about 2 years I held on to hope.

"One day it'll all get better." And similar. I heard it so much I believed it deep down. That one day maybe it'll all end.

One day he'll stop. He'll go away again and I can start healing and making a life.

I don't have hope anymore.

Not anymore.

It's been at Least 2.5y.

At Least.

I suck at keeping track.

You break.

You fold.

You lose hope.

I can't run. He's in my head.

I can't go to the cops or a shelter. He's in my head.

The meds aren't enough to make it stop. (Maybe if I had a decent dr it could've worked.)

Therapy can't help me cause I'm Currently being controlled and abused, in every category of abuse.

I wish I were dead.

I wish I could k1ll myself.

But my younger brother died 2 years ago.

And since then I don't have it in me to k1ll myself.

Can't do that to my mom and brother. They can't lose us both.

So I'm stuck living.

In a hell scape that people want to just brush off and ignore. Cause to them it's not real. To them it doesn't matter.

It's real to me.

I experience it as if it were real.

But they don't treat me like that's what I'm dealing with.

And I can't even tell them outright myself.

Cause he won't allow me to talk about it. They know. More or less depending on who. But they don't treat it like that's the case. And they never will.

Cause they can't see the scars, rope burns, rashes, cuts, brandings...

They can't see him. Hey can't hear him.

It's not real to them.

It's not the same to them as if it were in shared reality.

I just wanna die.

I just want out.

I don't have a life to hold onto.

I'm just doing it cause I Have to.

Sorry for the rant....

I just....

I wish I could kms...

Maybe one day I'll mercy k1ll myself ...

Maybe one day....,

[cloysauce]

tell me that you love me (spoiler-free musings)

tell me that you love me is like a book you take to a solo trip, or the actual trip itself where you are alone with your thoughts during a long bus ride. from all the year-end noise, this was an understated drama, the strength of which were the quiet moments—zooming into one's thoughts and emotions, saying so much in just a few words, choice gestures, or nothing at all. restraint and reticence were used to magnify the struggle when words weren't enough. i liked how the scenes drifted to one place or another, physically or from one state of mind to the next with only gentle music playing, the music is so therapeutic and calming, it's perfect for meditation.

i think i'll miss the comfort more than anything, the curve going to jung moeun's cozy abode, the back of cha jinwoo as he paints, the public piano in the middle of a park, the corners of the art gallery, the underground dressing room of a small local theatre, the breezy coastlines of jeju. though i've never been to these locations in person, the drama took me to those safe places.

it's the first drama i've seen twice almost immediately for a good while and won't mind seeing again if just to remind myself to breathe and rest for a while (except for the stressful confrontations). but also one that i don't feel the striking need to follow and download all the things (unlike a certain fandom i'm currently in) and i deeply appreciate that because a hyperfixation can be really exhausting. the only thing i'm taking away with me is the 2-hour OST playlist on spotify.

tmtylm is a comfy chair waiting to be sat on, an invitation to be alone in your thoughts and feelings. it's a respite and what i wish i can replicate in my writing. the drama is as what moeun wrote on the sticky note: I leave after briefly staying by a stranger on the street. I hope you're not lonely anymore.

[yandere-romanticaa]

Okok lemme try to explain 😪

So I finished classes early today at 10:30 am and I'm a commuter so my trip to uni and back is about 1 hour and 15 minutes, not too bad but I have to be a little efficient with my time. Now I live in Belgium a little over the border with the Netherlands and because the city I live in is not very big and I don't have a car I usually take a like 20 min bus trip to the capital of the province nearest to me in the Netherlands yeah? And one of the busses I can take takes me straight over the border pretty much right in front the center of the city with a supermarket like a 2 minute walk away from the bus stop. And right next to that supermarket is an Asian grocery store. So I went down there to get some stuff from both of those and when I was walking towards the Asian grocery store I looked up and suddenly saw this guy staring at me so I made sure to go very far around him into the store but he started following me and starting telling me how beautiful I was, that I was lovely and any man would be lucky to have me Yada Yada I unfortunately put my headphones away like a minute before I saw him so I couldn't even pretend not to hear him so I just tried subtly ignoring him hoping that being in such a public place would deter him soon but that didn't happen, then he started obscuring the path and trying to grab my wrist so I ended up only getting some noodles and rushing to the cash register and he finally left so I thought I was done with him yeah? I waited inside the store for a bit, got some Boba to calm down and the guy seemed to be completely gone so I carefully went out again and he wasn't in the area AT ALL, so I went over to the grocery store, I was peacefully shopping there looking at some bread and suddenly this guy rushes in the store loudly proclaiming 'We meet again' lemme tell you my heart sunk!! He started again with the compliments or whatever and said he just wanted to talk to me and to look him in the eyes because I was so pretty?? And I was just quickly going trough the store trying to get what I needed and told him I was busy and needed to go home but he started whining and telling me that I shouldn't be like that and that we should meet again because he wants to talk to me and he tried caressing my face but I dodged and went back to the cash register because I was finally done but this time he followed me and said he wouldn't leave until he got an answer and managed to grab my wrist this time and let me tell you I could CRYYYY!!! there were only teenage girls working near the registers at the moment so I couldn't even blame them but I checked out already and SPRINTED upstairs and by a stroke of luck the bus I needed was just approaching so I ran over there at full speed and it drove away and hopefully I won't see him again but omgggg I cried on the bus ride home I was so scared :( sorry it got so long I needed to explain everything properly

IT'S OK BABE, I literally died on the inside when he started throwing those weird ass compliments at you, men like this are some of the biggest enigmas I've ever encountered and I'll never understand why they do this... You were saved by the grace of God, the universe or whatever the hell you believe in but I hope this never happens to you ever again... I legit don't even know what to say other than maybe a few self defense techniques wouldn't hurt to know.

[mprimn]

It has been 3 days since I arrived in Japan.

They wouldn't allow students to enter the dorm until a specific date, so I flew on the day before as I didn't want to spend money on hotels. It was a late-night flight so it was mostly peaceful, except that one toddler in the far front who cried from time to time.

A girl in front of me decided to watch 2005 version of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory so I just watched from her screen the whole flight. There were so many details and scenes that I have forgotten because I saw the movie when I was very young.

The flight attendants kept mistaking me and the Japanese lady's nationality during service which I found quite funny. They thought the Japanese lady was from my country, but when they realized she wasn't they somehow assumed I was also Japanese. I replied to them in Japanese anyway because why not. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

When the plane landed it started raining, making the temperature a lot cooler than I expected. The immigration process took so long that once I got out of the airport I only have a few hours left to travel to the appointed destination. I went down to the train, but the ticket booth was super crowded that I'd have to wait for another train for almost an hour. The bus had only 1 trip per day to my destination won't be coming soon, so I bit the bullet and got on a taxi.

There is a reason why Japanese people avoid taxis.

The service was top notch, but it came with a price.

A ridiculously expensive one.

(And that I also told the driver to take the fastest route, so it costed even higher)

Dear my parents, if you're reading this, I'm so sorry I spent 50k yen on 2 and a half hour ride from Narita to Mito. I will make sure to find a part time job once I know of my study schedule.

After reaching the destination, I paid the driver with my credit card so I signed the receipt with my signature in my language.

Apparently, that's when the driver realized I'm a foreigner.

He seemed shocked and amazed because after apologizing (I asked him to repeat something, but he didn't make it sound easier to understand so I just nodded), he complimented my accent saying how natural it was.

It may have something to do with my appearance too since I'm Asian. Even the local students at the dorm said I look like a Japanese. It was kind of fun at first, but I'm starting to feel like it's more of a debuff because instead of yasashii nihongo, I will be hit with normal level speech that can be very hard to listen.

In the evening of the first day, me and other 2 students from my country went to 3 different supermarkets to find items for our dorm. They even rode bicycles to a Donki far deep in the city to buy pillows (only mattress is provided in the dorm), utensils, and so much more. There were only 2 bicycles available so I just waited for them at the lounge, praying for their safety because one said they almost crashed into a car.

The two bought lots of ingredients to cook food on their own while I mostly bought instant meals. I don't feel like cooking because I'll have to wash the dishes, so I bought different food and put them together.

Personally, I think it turned out great.

The students from my country came from the same university and one is a classmate of mine. They are a cheerful person and a socializer. They probably befriended most of the exchange students already at this point. Thanks to them introducing me to others, I was able to talk and make friends with more people. Everyone was really kind. Some students' Japanese or English skills might not be very strong, but nothing can stop any of them from having fun together.

Tomorrow after sending in our documents at the City Hall, the exchange students are planning to have a barbeque party. I also heard another party will be held after too. It hasn't been a week, yet everyone seemed to close to each other. From a view of someone who's socially awkward, I find that fascinating.

I hope to get to know more of everyone soon.

[ja-stuff]

mentiong their ex in front of their s/o during an argument (break-up???)

Note: I made this in a rush got no time to proofread, my college papers are piling up and I did this during my 30-minute break lmao~ I still hope y'all still like it :> I'll make it up for its part 2 and the other updates! I'm sorry T_T

word count: 1, 864

character: Haitani Ran

tw: break-up/space with no closure and clearing misunderstanding lmao, hurtful words

genre: light angst

“You’ve got too many friends of both sex, or maybe you have more male friends.” Ran jokes continuously with you, but you didn’t like it one bit. “Asuka never had male friends… maybe she did but it’s not like she always hang-out with them. God, she’s so obedient.” he chuckled after saying those words which made you sigh. You know that he’s going to mention his ex after the first words, but you just let him continue as he pleases.

You’ve always had the heart to participate in any charity events, your energy is known to be the type to attract people and make them feel the positivity you always emit around them, making these kinds of events the suitable work for you. On the other hand, just like how any other person’s attracted to you, Ran also became addicted to your overwhelming presence when he saw you at a park before, love at first sight indeed. A few more days of stalking you, he’s sure that you’re the one he’s willing to give you more than anything you have and keep you by his side for as long as he breathes, your pureness and innocence makes him more attracted to you that he’s willing to keep you away from everyone and protect you from the chaotic world.

Now, Ran always has the duty to pick you up at your house to drop you at your workplace then pick you up again after your work is done. This was his routine since he started to date you, and you really didn’t mind it. You’re comfortable with him around despite knowing what job he has and you know that Ran can be obedient with you and would listen to you when you told him to stop. Like right now.

“Stop the car.” You interrupted Ran from his Asuka ‘rants’ that made him stop blurting more words. You can feel his eyes staring at you while you keep yours straight on the road. “Why? Are you hungry? Wanna stop at that convenience store over there? You’re going to eat again, bubs? But we just had our breakfast at your house. Asuka doesn’t eat much like you—“

“I said stop the car, Ran.” you still keep your eyes on the road. “Wait, what happened to ‘bubs’, bubs?” he asked with a nervous chuckle bringing his eyes back to the road. Ran's not used to you calling his name since you’re the one who always calls him the cute names. He waited for you to say something about it but this time you didn’t bother correcting yourself.

“Just pull-over.” Pointing your finger at the bus stop.

“No! I— I mean why?” he asked and looked at you again, you can feel him getting confused just by how he looks at you. “Just ‘cause.” Ran raised a brow when he heard your answer, he knew that you were not the type to be short with your words, and this Y/n with him right now is a little unfamiliar to him.

“ Wait– A–are you angry with me? What’s with the m–mood, love?” he asked, starting to feel a little nervous.

“Yes, I am.” You answered, not even planning to spare him a glance. You’re trying your best not to look at him, ‘cause if you do, you know that you’re going to snap at him and won’t be able to control your emotions.

“Why? I didn’t do anything?!” Ran raised his voice, feeling wrong with the situation where he forgot what had happened before you started acting that way. His head was full of random events of his teasing with you but none of those thoughts included his talks about his ex, 'cause he simply thought that you won't be affected with it. What a dumb man.

“Are you sure you didn’t do shit?” You asked. Your voice is overflowing with coldness, but your smirk made Ran’s brow furrow.

“Yeah! What’s wrong with you babe?” Ran calmly said but his voice was a little tense because of how he became a little irked with your reaction and how you responded towards him. He looked at you but was surprised when he met your eyes.

“No. What’s wrong with you!” your icy glare piercing his heart with how angry they looked. Fights are rare since both of you make up even before the argument heats up, but Ran knows for sure that a fight that cannot be soothed immediately is occurring, he just couldn’t put his finger on why you’re acting up.

“Hey— why’re you raising you—“ he questioned you, concerned orbs looking at you. He knew that putting more fuel into your burning emotion would make it worse. At least he knows that. His eyes shifted to you and the road, his voice came out soft but was interrupted when you spoke.

“Cause I want you to know that I’ve had enough.” you blurted as you kept your eyes on him, digesting his reactions from hearing your words. “Ran, I hate you. I really do.” This time your voice sounded more like a whisper, as you breathed heavily.

“I hate that you’re so insensitive and always play as if you’re joking every time you mention her name. I fucking hate you.” You lowered your gaze and stared at your hands, biting your inner cheeks as you held back your tears.

“So this is about how I always mention Asuka’s name—“ he casually said, he’s aware that he has been mentioning her name for quite some time now, but Ran thought that exes are just exes. He didn’t know that you’ll get affected by it.

“Yeah. And I am saying if this relationship always keeps on mentioning one of your exes, then we’re better off seeing each other.” you continued, ‘Shit. Shit. Shit.’ he cursed at the back of his mind, his heartbeat started to race when he heard your last words. He sure was jealous of how close you are with lots of your friends, how you’re easily flocked by men/women that he thinks are a threat in your relationship.

“You’re— you wanna break up with me?” Ran stuttered as he asked you, but when you didn’t answer him, he fell silent before he decided to clear the misunderstandings by trying to explain himself ‘cause that’s the only thing he knew that would make things better. He slowed down the car when he noticed that the park where the event you’re participating is only a few blocks away. He knew he needed time to be with you before sending you to work safely.

“Hey, bubby— hey, listen to me okay? Let me explain—“ You looked up and panicked a little, you never planned to listen to him ‘cause you knew that would make things worse for you. It’s not like you never wanted to hear the explanation, rather you just don’t wanna listen to it now as you know well to yourself that you needed to get away from your boyfriend and heal the wounds he inflicted on you from the past months. You didn’t let him finish with what he was trying to say and spilled all your emotions at the place.

“Explain what? You’re always finding reasons to get you out of this kind of situation. Do you think I’m that dumb to not notice your acting as if what you said and did are only jokes? Ran, I am getting tired, it’s been three months since you started doing this— now I am thinking that you don’t want this relationship and as if you’re doing those things on purpose, that you’re just tormenting me, provoking me and pushing me to my limits of cutting you out of my life.”

“Bubs, I am sorry— but that’s not how it is. I was just jealous—“

“To the point of hurting me emotionally and mentally? I am losing my confidence every time you mention her, Ran. I am deeply hurt hearing another person’s name coming from your mouth, and knowing that person was the one you once shared intimacy with before– If I did this to you what would you feel then?” At this point, you’re already crying, which made Ran stop the car a few houses away from the park. His conscience started to beat him up as he quietly cursed himself. Never had he imagined hurting you this way. You’re his sunshine and you exist to shine brighter than anyone else, he only wanted for you to experience the best things and make you smile, but now he’s seeing tears coming out of your beautiful eyes and he hates that he is the cause.

“I’d get hurt… but bubs please let me explain— no. Let me make it up to y—“ He removed his seatbelt and was about to envelop you into a hug for comfort but you put two hands out and stopped him.

“Ran, I want some space.”

“No! I don’t want that! Please? Anything but tha—“ his voice raised again, trying his best to change your mind. You’re there but it started to feel like you’re not. Ran’s feeling the phantom walls you never had before be built in front of him.

“But I don’t want anything. I should get going…”

“I don’t want to—“ feeling the walls starting to get higher and higher, scared Ran. Believing that the only way to break it would be closing your distance was his last resort.

“Ran, let go.” you were surprised by his sudden hug, he started sobbing which made you melt, but this is not the time to be swayed by this emotion you are feeling. You wanted some time to think, that’s why you only asked for space, it’s not like you wanted to leave him, but you also wanted him to do it as well.

“No, we will talk somewhere— let me explain please?” You try to push him back, but that only makes him cling to you tighter.

“Ran, ple–”

“Please? I don’t want you to leave me. I can’t—“ your tears started to fall again as you kept on pushing him away.

“Do you think I wanted to leave y–you? You pushed me like this, y–your actions gave me the idea of this kind of r–resolution, so you should just deal with it and give me the s–space that I need.” Your voice almost begged him to stop and let you go, but Ran didn’t budge.

“Y/n… I’m sorry please…”

“Let me go.”

“Don’t please? D—don’t go, my love” this time he pulled away but was about to kiss you when you turned your face away, and removed the seatbelt. His hand was about to reach your arm, but you swatted it away.

“We’ll talk once I feel like it. Take care.” you opened the door and looked at him once more

“Y/n— Y/n! Please— d—don’t! S—stay with me, I am b—begging you, love! Don’t do this to me— I love you— *screams*”

You walked out of the car and straightened your clothes, you wiped a few stray tears away before plastering a smile and running towards the direction of the park. You ignored Ran’s screaming from inside the car, and a few beeps he made from letting out his frustration at the steering wheel.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you for reading! Hoped you liked it! Oh! Here is my master list ^^ stay hydrated and keep safe loves!

Please support/ donate something for me on Patreon and Ko-fi as well! (I’ll be posting the commissions and other requests! I’ll give my best with all of your support! )

[fizzyxcustard]

"I Never Knew It'd Be Like This"  (Armitage  Summer Splash Day 2)

As part of @lathalea and I's Armitage Summer Splash, I present to you, day 2.

Masterlist of fics for Summer Splash

Prompts: Above image. "I never knew it'd be like this." Only one bed trope.

Fandom: North & South - modern John Thornton

Pairings: Modern!John Thornton x Fem!Reader (very slight)

Warnings:

Summary: You are John Thornton's secretary and have agreed to travel to New York with him in high hopes of sealing a deal for his company at Marlborough Mills. However, your boss begins to show that temper of his when things don't go according to plan.

Comments/Notes: If anyone would like to be added to or removed from my tag list, please say. Another fic about hotels, seeing as day 1 had the main characters staying in a hotel.

John was exasperated. Your plane had been delayed by an hour. You had waited ninety minutes for your shuttle bus from JFK to Manhattan, and now you were standing in the reception of your hotel, being told that only one room had been booked.

"I booked this myself a month ago," you told the blonde woman who was starting to grow quite scared of John. You could see her keep looking over at your rather annoyed boss who had the ability to make anyone shake just by the scowl on his face. "I made sure it was for two rooms."

John stepped away from the desk, recognising immediately why he had hired you as his secretary. You had the way with people that he didn't. When people had an issue with their wages, annual leave days or general working conditions, they came to you. Approaching John Thornton was a last resort.

"Okay, thank you," you said to the lady at reception, trying not to sigh and show your annoyance.

"What's happening? I had to step away because I knew I'd start shouting," John told you.

"They've apparently overbooked and they've only got one room available for us, and it's got one double bed," you sighed.

"Oh, this is bloody ridiculous!" John hissed. He dashed to the desk and began to ask if the manager was available.

"John! Calm down, please," you urged him.

The lady behind the desk was backing off, unsure what to do and showing signs that she hadn't been in this job for very long. Hotels always had their fair share of angry guests, and most staff members became used to it over time. This woman, however, did not have the confidence and assertiveness that most hotel staff had.

Ten minutes later, you and John admitted defeat and made your way to the elevator. But, on a positive note, you had now managed to get yourselves free drinks in the bar and free meals for the rest of your stay.

"I never knew it'd be like this," John mused to himself as you both stood in the elevator, feeling it shudder beneath you as it rose up the floors.

"What?"

"New York. It's busy, stinks, and everything has gone wrong since we landed," he sighed, crossing his arms. "Makes me wonder if this place is cursed."

"Come on, stop being so pessimistic," you urged him. The loud ping of the elevator stopping drew you both out of your thoughts, and you stepped out onto the sixth floor, trailing your suitcases behind you.

"I'm glad it's only for two nights. I'll take the floor," John said as he looked upon the double bed dominating the centre of the room which you walked into. He couldn't deny that he felt a pang of something. Anticipation, maybe? A shiver raced up his spine, and he looked across to you, only to see you looking down at the beige carpet

"The bed is big enough for two people with plenty of space in the middle. You won't even know I'm there."

John smirked to himself. Of course he'd know you were there. Even when you weren't there, he still felt you somehow. He had spent enough time around you to acknowledge that his feelings ran deeper than purely platonic. And for a second he thought back on the men who worked in the mill, who would wolf whistle at you as they passed by the office. Then, to his amazement, some of them you even spoke to! Why would you ever entertain the idea of talking to men who only saw you as a piece of meat?

You looked out the window only to see dark and heavy clouds had settled over the city, and rain was falling. "We should make the most of those free meal tickets tonight," you chuckled.

You and John went down to the lounge area a couple of hours later, your special tickets in hand to give you access to free food and drinks. Suddenly, John's phone began to ring. He stepped away from you for a minute, excusing himself with a smile.

You sat down at a table and began to skim the menu, but John's irate voice wafted through the room. Customers of the lounge began to stare, their heads turning in the direction of the angry voice.

"If this is how you're going to manage your time then you can shove the fucking deal!" John boomed.

You tried not to focus on the sea of heads that had turned towards you and followed John to the seat opposite you.

"What's happened now?" you asked in frustration and embarrassment.

"The meeting for tomorrow has been cancelled, and they don't know when they can re-schedule it to. Possibly not for another three months. They can kiss my..."

"John?" You interrupted. "Just calm down for five minutes and enjoy some food."

***

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[one-sad-human]

•Pinky Promises• Steven Adler

Pairing: Steven Adler x Reader, Axl Rose x Sibling! Reader

Requested? Yup! By an anon

Theme: Angst(?) to fluff

Warnings: Language, sexual references but nothing explicit

Word Count: 1.8k

A/N: Fic 1 of 2! Hope you enjoy! Also, the makeout near the end gets sorta hot and it was pretty fun to write? Like I’m considering exploring into writing smutter pieces. I didn’t want to originally because I thought I’d cringe all the way through and hate the result but I might try it out in the near future. Nothing too crazy but it’s something for me to think about.

     You step off of the large bus, your combat boots hitting the ground as you adjust the bag slung over your shoulder. It's stuffed to the brim with whatever you threw in, you're surprised the zipper did burst.

     You take a deep breath of the LA air. It's hot and humid and despite the thick air pollution, you can breath easier than you did in Indiana.

     You grew up in Lafayette, Indiana with your older half-brother William. You were raised in the hellish house with your shared father, which you finally managed to escape.

     William left right at eighteen. He tried taking you with him, but you didn't want him to be charged with kidnapping and have the cops on his ass. Now, two years and your father's stolen wallet later, you're finally in the city of dreams.

     "Will!" You yell out, spotting your redheaded other half.

     "Y/N!" He mocks, catching your figure in a crushing hug. He's taller than you, so you have to stand on your tippy toes during the embrace. "Thank God you're alright."

     "I'm fine, I'm happy to finally see you again," you say, a huge grin on your face. "How's the band? Everything going well?"

     "Well enough," he says with a shrug, grabbing your heavy bag and slinging it around his shoulder. "Come on, I'll introduce you to the guys. You already know Izzy of course, but the rest of them."

     The walk to the 'hell house' as Will had called it is filled with catching up. He made sure to keep in contact with you, but the phone calls were always short. It felt nice to have a full length conversation in person with your brother again.

     "Welcome home," Will says, leading you into the house. You grimace when you catch a whiff of stale beer and weed.

     "You seriously live here? This place should be condemned," you say with disgust.

     "And then where would we live?" The oh-so familiar voice of Will's best friend meets your ears. You whip around and fly into his arms.

     "Jeffery! I missed you so much! You really should've tried calling, you ass!" You exclaim. Izzy rolls his eyes but smiles nonetheless, patting your back during the hug.

     "Who's this?" Another man enters the living room— if that's what it should even be called. He's blonde, taller than you but shorter than the other two men in the room. He has kind eyes and the smile he has on his handsome face leaves you speechless.

     "U-uh, hi. I'm Y/N," you say after a moment of shameless gawking. If he noticed, he doesn't mention it.

     "Oh that's right! Axl talks a lot about you! I'm Steven," he says and bounds up to you, catching your hand in a shake. You don't question who the hell 'Axl' is, but you smile stupidly at him and bite your lip with a blush staining your face.

     "No," Will says, glaring at the cute blonde you've taking an immediate liking to. "Absolutely not."

     "William!" You squeak out, pinching his shoulder harsher. He yelps and swats your hand away. Will glares further at you as he ushers you up the creaky stairs to your room. "Nothing happened! And who the fuck is 'Axl'?"

     "I saw how you were looking at him! I'm not naive, Y/N. You were giving him the 'fuck me' eyes! And me, everyone calls me Axl here." You give him a look. "Except you, of course. You can call me Will."

     You don't give him another word as he leads you to your bedroom. He was the one who didn't have a roommate before, and he'd have to share with Slash now but he was determined to give you your privacy.

     "This is the only room with a working lock, use it. Especially when your changing! Three horny men in a house with one you isn't a good combo." You make a face and shake your head, but you can't really tell if he's being overprotective or if his band mates really are pigs.

     "Are you not including Izzy?"

     "Please, he's the only smart one besides me. He knows I'll rip him a new one." You laugh and give Will another hug.

     "I've really missed hanging out with you like this, and thank you for letting me stay here." He nods and rubs your back.

     "No problem, we have each other's backs, always." You nod and release your bother from the hug. "One rule though: no hooking up with the guys. One time thing or not, you don't know them like I do, I won't let you get hurt. So don't even try anything with Steven!"

     "Even if it's nothing sex?" Will levels you with a look that would make you sweat if you were anyone else. You sigh and roll your eyes. "Fine! I promise."

     "Pinky promise?" He asks, holding out his pinky finger. You shake your head but comply anyway, hooking your pinky on his.

     "Wow, bringing out the big guns, pinky promises," you tease.

     "Bitch," he mumbles. You gasp sarcastically.

     "Asshole!" You reply. William takes his leave with another slew of insults under his breath but none to be taken seriously and all with a smile. You shut your door after him and lay on your bed, content with how things are finally beginning to look up.

If you knew where you would be in just a few months of living with your brother and his band, you never would've agreed to the naive promise Will had forced on you. You think back to the day with a frown.

"Whatcha thinkin' about?" Steven asks, pecking your bare shoulder as he lays behind you on your bed. You both lay naked and damp with sweat, glowing from the moonlight streaming in the room.

"William," you say with a sigh.

"We just had sex and your thinking of your brother? Should I be worried about you?" Steven asks teasingly. You fight the smile growing on your face and lightly pinch the his arm tightly wrapped around you. He never fails to make you laugh.

"I just feel bad keeping this a secret from him." You turn around to be face to face with Steven. "It's been months of sneaking around. I'm always nervous we'll get caught together or I'll blurt it out to him."

"Then why don't we just tell him?"

"Do you want to die! Steven, honestly, do you have a death wish?"

"No, but—"

"Then we can't tell my brother we're together. He'll murder you, and then probably me one he finds out how long I've been lying to him," you say and move your head in the crook of Steven's neck.

"Then we can be together in the afterlife!" Steven folds his arms around you even tighter. "Seriously though, we can't lie to him forever. We've been together for six months already, surely he'll see how much we care about each other and not want to kill us."

"Yeah, maybe," you say halfheartedly and close your eyes, finally letting yourself fall asleep.

The next night, Guns has a gig at the Whiskey A-Go Go. The ritual goes like it has been, they play the gig, you wait for Will to get drunk, and you and Steven sneak out to the back of the club to make out and maybe get felt up a bit before returning like nothing happened.

It isn't different this time. Steven's hands leave your skin ablaze as he lets them wander down your sides and up your thighs. His lips don't leave yours, even as he squeezes your ass and you let out a moan. He grins on your mouth and presses his pelvis up to your stomach.

His mouth leaves yours to press feather light kisses to your cheek before trailing down your jaw and onto your neck, where he sucks nips at. You have to press a hand to your mouth to stay quiet.

"Don't leave marks," you remind him through batted breath.

"I won't," he reassures and silences you with a chaste kiss to your swollen lips before returning his attack on your neck.

You hear footsteps fast approaching, but as quickly as you hear them, Steven is ripped away from you. He's slammed into the brick wall next to you harshly and groans. You jump away and gasp.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" William asks, his voice lower than usual. His green eyes dark and downright scary.

"Will! Let him go, come on. Stop fucking around, you didn't have to slam him into a wall," you say, but your shaky voice falls on deaf ears as Will doesn't move. Your hands grasp at his arm and try to yank him away from Steven, but he's stronger and taller than you and doesn't budge, he just keeps his eyes focused on Steven.

"Nothing!" He squeaks out. Even in the dark, his kiss bruised lips and flushed red face is obvious.

"'Nothing?' That's why you were ten seconds away from fucking Y/N?" Will asks.

"William stop it! You're scaring me! Leave him alone!" You push him again and this time, he relents. Will paces and runs his hand through his red locks while you rush to make sure Steven is ok.

"I'm fine, I'm fine," Steven mutters and presses a kiss to your brow to comfort you, sending you a smile when he pulls away. He keeps his hands on your arms and rubs circles with his thumbs.

"How long has this been going on?" Will asks, crossing his arms as he finally stops his pacing.

"Six months..." Steven says nervously. William scoffs and shakes his head. "But it isn't just fucking around! I love them, Ax. Really."

You smile bashfully, biting your lip to try and contain it. You knew you felt strongly for Steven and that he returned the feelings, but you haven't outright said you loved each other— until know of course.

Will stays silent for a few beats, staring contemplative at Steven. He finally sighs, bring a hand up to rub his temples like he has a building headache.

"Yeah? And you love him, Y/N?" He asks. You nod, reaching out to grab Steven's hand. Steven lets a grin creep on to his face. "Then I guess I can't stop you. But if you ever break their heart, I'll fucking gut you, Adler."

If Will makes Steven nervous, he doesn't show it. He gives him a salute with his puppy dog like smile before sticking out his pinky.

"I promise I'll never hurt Y/N purposely, ever." Will rolls his eyes, the irony makes him nearly groan aloud. He sucks it up anyway when he sees your hopeful expression, hooking his pinky onto Steven's.

"Don't make me regret this, Steven," Will grumbles before leaving and walking back into the crowded club. Steven lets out an exhilarated laugh and kisses you, hard.

"Told you he wouldn't kill me!" Steven exclaims, making you laugh out of surprise.

"And we don't have to sneak around anymore!" Steven kisses you again, and again and again until you're breathless.

"I'm so in love with you," he mumbles between his attack on your lips. You smile, tangling your hands in his aqua-net filled hair.

"As I am with you."

[serenityseventeen]

Love & Letter: To The Thirteen Boys I've Loved Before

The Ninth Letter

----------------

To: Kim Mingyu

From: Y/N

Dear Mingyu, are you doing well?

Well, we don't see each other often anymore so I'm always wondering that. We used to always bump into each other at the grocery store or the mall. Now, I don't even see you anywhere.

I don't blame you for it. Now that we've broken up, I can feel your love. The love that you gave me when we were together still lingers. I haven't forgotten about you yet. Do you know why? It's because I'm convinced. I still love you.

These days, even after breaking up with you, I still think back on our sweet moments. I stayed up late a few days ago, just thinking back on our relationship and how far in love we were.

Before I go to sleep, I always feel the empty space beside my bed for you. You came by to my dormitory whenever you had the chance and would sleep in my bed because you said you missed me. Thank God my dormitory allowed visitors because if it didn't, we would have seen each other even less.

Even if I was just working on school assignments on my laptop, you would crawl beside me and sleep. Sometimes, no, every time, I couldn't stop myself from messing up your soft hair. You didn't want to bother me and just wanted to be by me so you slept, right?

Well, you sleeping was just as big of a distraction.

I promised to tell you on your birthday when and why I fell for you. Today is your birthday. April 6th.

I'll tell you, in this letter.

It wasn't on the first day that I began working at the cafe with you that I fell for you. I started working at the cafe in the middle of summer break for more money and you were my senior. You know how hard it was for me. I needed money for living expenses and my father was hospitalized for cancer.

I'll get back to the subject. I started falling in love with you because...well, you were you. Your personality, just the way you were made me gradually fall for you. You made my heart flutter and race with your gentle and caring actions. You were also funny and kind and clumsily cute.

Before I met you, I was battling a small heartbreak. I lost one of my friends because I liked them romantically. I was going to push myself away from love because you know, loving me is like a curse. I didn't want to fall in love again but then you... I met you.

At first, I was growing a bit suspicious of you? I was starting to think that you liked me when you always hovered over me and lingered behind me. You also held my hand frequently to ‘help’ me.

I didn't think much of it until I saw your eyes and smile. I always thought that I fell in love way too easily but I don't know how I was able to resist you. That's when your indirect back hugs began to make my heart pound.

Summer break was almost over and I became sure of my feelings the more that I hung out with you. We would also coincidentally meet each other at the grocery store, food markets, and malls, and we were able to hang out together that way too. Shopping with you was fun and memorable.

Since summer break was coming to an end, I didn't want to go back to college with a lump in my chest. I just felt like I should tell you about my feelings while not expecting us to date.

So, that's how I asked you out.

I made sure that it was only us in the kitchen of the cafe. I was pretty confident that you liked me back but I still wanted to ask.

We were washing dishes when I said, “Mingyu, I like you. What do you think of me?”

“You? Of course, I like you too.”

I won't lie, the answer got me a bit disappointed at first, but then you kissed me softly on the lips afterward and made me realize otherwise.

I liked the romance we had. There was no one to tell us apart. At work, when we were alone, you would become all lovey-dovey with me, sneaking kisses and grabbing my hand. I liked it. It gave me this feeling of... Youthful romance?

With you, I was able to overcome everything hard. College was kicking me constantly but I was always excited to come to work. I was always excited for the weekend because we could just lay in each other's arms. We would go on classic dates, holding hands, walking. Mingyu, it was because of you that I was able to smile.

You even visited my father with me, bringing delicious foods that you made yourself. Do you know how grateful I am for that? I always thanked you but I am truly thankful. My dad liked you a lot and wanted to see you often. Seeing you two get along made me happy.

I was really happy but of course, the curse had to strike and everything we built had to come tumbling down.

We didn't last long enough to even celebrate your birthday, which is regretful. I actually already had a gift for you, a nice watch because you recently broke yours, but I guess I can't give it to you. Maybe I'll slip the watch in the envelope with this letter.

I know for you, it'd be hard to believe what I'm about to say but please, believe me. I was cowardly and because I didn't want to hurt you more in the future, I made that decision.

Mingyu, I know I still love you.

Maybe there was a chance that we would break through and not drift apart but to me, that's nothing but assumptions and I don't want to get ahead of myself.

College is tough and I'm sure you understand that. After I got fired from the cafe, I knew that I wouldn't be able to see you that much anymore. Plus, you also know that I started taking more part-time jobs to pay for my father's hospital bills and my own living. We both needed money just as much as we needed each other.

Maybe if I made the decision of ignoring that guy, I wouldn't have gotten fired; but I couldn't stand it. I saw you too, clenching your fist as you watched, I just got to the guy before you did. I mean, how could he so publicly harass one of the waitresses? I was so angry and got out of control, so I threw a milk bottle at him. I don't know if I should regret that choice.

I don't want you to think that you were nothing but filler, something to fill in my romance cravings amidst my hectic schedules. I truly loved you and I know that because I feel it. I can feel this strong desire to stay with you, see you smile, spend time with you...

And if you read this letter, you might ask, “Then why did you break up with me if you felt like that?”

Well, I didn't want to become a burden.

The day was already gloomy and the weather said it was going to rain. I asked to meet up and when you rushed over, I could tell that you already knew what was coming.

I don't have enough time for love. My weekends became bombarded with part-time jobs so I was rarely at the dormitory. My schedules became hectic and school just made it harder for us to see each other.

It was beginning to rain when I started talking.

“Mingyu, I think we should stop seeing each other; we don't even see each other often.”

“But it's fine, isn't it? Why would we...”

“You know how it is for me.”

“It'll be fine, Y/N. I'll be here for you no matter what.”

I shook my head.

“Let's just break up.”

I don't know what was going on in your head but I'm sure you were angry. I couldn't read your eyes and I couldn't tell what you were thinking because I was consistently repeating to myself in my head while holding back my tears, ‘I'm sorry’.

“Why? We can overcome this! I'm sure I can help your father get better. We can live together, we can help each other.”

“I'm sorry, Mingyu.”

I remember you took my hand when as I was turning to leave. I almost cried.

“Why?” You asked. “I know we can...”

“Mingyu... don't get ahead of yourself. I don't want to ruin our relationship because of my problems.”

It was painful for me to let you go. I just gave you my umbrella and boarded the bus. You were too late and started chasing it but didn't catch up. I began crying so much that I had to cover my face and mouth. I'm sure people were looking at me. With rain pattering the windows, my tears flowed.

I hope that somewhere, you have left a trace of me.

I have a feeling that somehow, I could have chosen a better solution for this problem. Now that I'm spending a few days back here at my house, I miss you more than usual. I dream every day that maybe, we'll meet again coincidentally and you had been waiting for me, but who am I to think that when I was the one who ended it?

You've stopped posting on your social media.

Yesterday night, I looked back on our pictures in my photo gallery and my heart ached so much. Just seeing your smile was enough to cheer me up but break me down at the same time.

I wanted to reach out to you today and wish you a happy birthday. I kept typing and erasing, typing and erasing, and in the end, I didn't send any sort of text. Your birthday is almost over and I haven't said anything nor have I given you my gift. I'm sorry. If I do send the gift, maybe we'll see each other again, but at the same time, I'm afraid to see you again.

Your puppy-like personality, your sweet words, your soft gestures, your smile that can light up my world, your everything that I loved, I miss it all. Will time do its work?

Maybe one day I will move on and forget you.

I don't think we have another chance.

You probably feel betrayed that I don't think our love was powerful enough to overcome my problems. Was I selfish? I think so. Now that I think about it, I didn't want to drag you into my problems but I didn't give you much chance to speak. I didn't want to hurt you but even then, I only thought about myself. I guess I didn't want the guilt of having you bear my problems with me. I was selfish and didn't consider anything else.

I couldn't think of any other solution.

If we did continue dating, would it have been better or worse for us? Would we have broken up with bigger scars or would we have continued our love with stronger hearts?

Yes, I was stupid. I'm a fool and I'm sorry. I won't be mad if you resent me because I'm just a cowardly fool. This letter makes me realize that now, belatedly.

All this time, I thought I was doing something right by not taking you into hell with me.

In the end, I still don't know if I chose the best choice for us.

Yours truly,

Y/N

-----------------

© serenityseventeen

7/2/21 - 3:17 pm

a/n: I have finally learned the chorus choreography to RTL. It's not as hard as Home or Getting Closer but it's also tiring lol. I need to work more on my posture and angles to make it look good. What should I learn next...?

[booksfromblackwood]

Is anyone still around in this fandom? If so, I thought I’d post the first chapter of an old fic that I re-wrote last year! Let me know if anyone’s still around, and if you’d be interested in reading more! Hope everyone reading this has a great day! :)

Han has left the chat.

Three Days Before The Disappearance

.Sam.Giddings. added josh_wash, ashleeeeey, xXGamerChrisXx, TheOriginalMatt, HanButterfly, BethWash, Mike_Munroe, EmilyD_, and _Jess.Riley_ to the chat.

.Sam.Giddings. named the chat Info For Tomorrow.

.Sam.Giddings.: Hey guys! Just to keep everyone updated on our travel plans for tomorrow! I know it's going to be a long day for everyone so it's vital we stick to the plan and stay in our groups where possible!

ashleeeeey: Okie-doodle!!

TheOriginalMatt: How are you so organised, Sam? You're a lifesaver!

HanButterfly: Hi!!

BethWash: trust sam to be more prepared than those of us organising the trip lol

xXGamerChrisXx: Since when was 'okie-doodle' a thing?

EmilyD_: Thanks Sam x

xXGamerChrisXx: And thanks so much, sam!

.Sam.Giddings.: So quick reminder of everyone's groups:

_Jess.Riley_: I'm stoked!!

ashleeeeey: That's rich coming from someone whose username is xXGamerChrisXx! :P

.Sam.Giddings.: Ash, Chris, Matt, and myself will start the journey first tomorrow morning.

xXGamerChrisXx: You wound me!

Mike_Munroe: Thanks for the plan, Sam!

TheOriginalMatt: Excited to see everyone tomorrow! This is going to be a killer weekend for sure!!

.Sam.Giddings.: Em, Mike, and Jess, you guys are next.

ashleeeeey: You're so dramatic!! XD

Mike_Munroe: Team Two here we go!!

xXGamerChrisXx: Made you smile, though! ;-)

josh_wash: what about us

.Sam.Giddings.: I'm just getting to that!

ashleeeeey: True :)

xXGamerChrisXx: You guys are already there and are therefore irrelevant! :P

.Sam.Giddings.: Han, Beth, and Josh, you guys are there already!

josh_wash: thanks cochise i feel so appreciated

BethWash: lol thanks chris

Mike_Munroe: So, what are we all up to?

BethWash: i found cake

xXGamerChrisXx: Browsing reddit like a nerd XD

ashleeeeey: Listening to Sam's rundown of tomorrow unlike sOmE pEoPlE *coughcoughChris*

EmilyD_: Honestly just packing my final things with Jess. Mike's mostly watching the TV.

xXGamerChrisXx: :-(

.Sam.Giddings.: So, tonight we should all make sure our bags are packed and that we have our passports and tickets ready!! Set your alarms for the right times (depending on your group) and make sure to sleep early too (especially if you're in my group since tomorrow will be an early start for us)!

ashleeeeey: :)

TheOriginalMatt: 5am gang where we AT?

HanButterfly: Beth where are you rn? Because I want some of that cake!!

.Sam.Giddings.: So Team One (myself, Chris, Ash, and Matt), we need to be up by 5:00am and be ready by 5:30am for the taxi to the airport!! Matt and Chris, yours is going to be at Chris' place at 5:24 for some reason so make sure to be ready!!

BethWash: the lodge kitchen bcos where else would there be cake han lol

.Sam.Giddings.: We'll meet up at the airport when we arrive! Once we re-group, we'll check in, probably eat some breakfast whilst we wait, and then catch the 8:30 plane!!

TheOriginalMatt: Sweet!

ashleeeeey: Can't wait! :)

josh_wash: yo matt you surviving the puns

.Sam.Giddings.: Team Two - you guys don't have to be up until around 9:00am since your taxi is at 9:20 and then your plane is at 11:30!

HanButterfly: Josh would you like me to save you some cake before we eat it all? :)

EmilyD_: We'll need a little longer than 20 minutes to all get ready but sure x

TheOriginalMatt: Just about! Myself and Chris have mostly been playing on his PS4 so I've been distracting myself with that! XD

josh_wash: yes please!

josh_wash: i feel for ya bro, a whole evening with chris' puns can prove fatal

josh_wash: you die of cringe

Mike_Munroe: Poor ol' Chris XD

.Sam.Giddings.: Once we arrive and get our bags, we need to catch the 2:30pm train and then the 4:20 bus! After that we have to take the 5:40 bus (I sent you guys screenshots of the route yesterday) and get off at Blackwood Pines ready for our hike up the mountain (with a little help from the cable car, of course)!

xXGamerChrisXx: I'm being BULLIED guys :(

ashleeeeey: Aw, poor Chris! :P

josh_wash: jk XD

TheOriginalMatt: I like how Sam's still here typing all we need to know whilst we're talking about cake and puns XD

.Sam.Giddings.: Team Two, you guys need to catch either the 5:30pm or the 6:00pm train depending on when your stuff arrives. After that you'll need to get the 7:50 bus and then the 8:40 bus to Blackwood Pines (you have to specify you want it to stop there or the driver won't stop) before you head up. Remember to lock the cable car station once you get in, Mike!

josh_wash: oh gosh tHE CAKE

Mike_Munroe: Gotcha' Sam!

HanButterfly: No worries, Josh! I managed to save most of it from Beth!

BethWash: rip my chance at a third slice of cake

_Jess.Riley_: Really, thanks Sam! We're all packed and ready to go! Xx

HanButterfly: It's really going to be such an awesome weekend! I can't wait :D

ashleeeeey: Thank you so much for inviting me! I've never been on something like this before!! :D

TheOriginalMatt: Yeah, thank you so much guys! I can't wait either, Han!!

.Sam.Giddings.: Have we got rooms sorted out for the lodge, guys?

BethWash: ash take the plans away from sam so she can have time to relax lol

EmilyD_: I'm with Mike in the room away from everyone like agreed right x

ashleeeeey: I'm trying but she won't let me! XD

HanButterfly: I mean if needs be we can sort out rooms once we're here! If not maybe we just sort out the first night rooms since it'll be fairly late when everyone arrives and then we can adjust them as needed as the trip goes on!

BethWash: lol poor sam will be up all night organising at this rate

.Sam.Giddings.: Sounds good, Han!

Mike_Munroe: Great idea, Hannah!

BethWash: em, yours and mike's room (upstairs guest) may not be ready first night so is it possible for you to share a room with jess til we get a chance to sort it out tomorrow?

EmilyD_: That's fine, hon. Thank you again for the trip and for letting us use the upstairs guest room x

josh_wash: how about for the first night emily and jess share beth's room and then beth sam and han go in hannah's room

josh_wash: mike can go to the small room downstairs if he's alright w/ that and matt can room w/ me

xXGamerChrisXx: Yo dude you forgot ash

ashleeeeey: It's alright, Chris! I can find somewhere!

EmilyD_: Ash you're honestly lovely but I'd kinda' like to be with either Jess or Mike if that's alright xx

ashleeeeey: No problem, Emily! I wouldn't want to intrude! :)

EmilyD_: Knew you'd understand xx

josh_wash: why dont you and ash share a room cochise

xXGamerChrisXx: I thought I was rooming with you and matt?

josh_wash: bro please just think for a minute here

ashleeeeey: I'm not sure.

xXGamerChrisXx: Beth, han, and sam, is there any room with you guys?

ashleeeeey: I'm really sorry to be a bother!!

.Sam.Giddings.: Of course you can room with us, Ash! We'd love to have you with us! :)

BethWash: im with sam

HanButterfly: Of course!!

xXGamerChrisXx: Thank you to the only valid washington kids right now!

josh_wash: -_-

xXGamerChrisXx: I see what you're doing, josh. ha ha, we've had our laugh, now please stop before this weekend.

Mike_Munroe: Rough subject, huh?

josh_wash: bro chill you know i was just joking

ashleeeeey: I'm really sorry!! Please don't get upset with each other!

xXGamerChrisXx: No ash it's alright! i promise i'm not actually mad! :-)

josh_wash: he acts mad over text to get his point across but he literally just sits there with a blank expression irl XD

TheOriginalMatt: Is Sam still there, Ash? Haven't heard from her in a while!

TheOriginalMatt: Gotta check up on my plane buddy for tomorrow!!

_Jess.Riley_: Did you guys get window seats or middle isle seats? I got a middle isle and the others got a window!

BethWash: she hasn't drowned in her notes has she lol

TheOriginalMatt: We got two sets of window seats! Though I don't know which of us is actually going to be at the window and which one will be window isle!

ashleeeeey: She's just brushing her teeth! Her mom came in and brought us a load of vegan snacks for the trip tomorrow and now I'm even more excited!!

ashleeeeey: Speaking of which, I'm probably going to head to sleep in a minute! Though I'm not sure how much I'll actually get since I'm so excited!!! :)

xXGamerChrisXx: Sleep well, ash. see you in the morning :-)

ashleeeeey: Night, Chris :)

ashleeeeey has left the chat.

_Jess.Riley_: Well that was cute!

xXGamerChrisXx: People say goodnight to eachother! that's a normal human interaction!

_Jess.Riley_: You know full well it's cute when it's you two

.Sam.Giddings.: Ash told me she logged out so I came to say goodnight!

josh_wash: w/ jess on this one bro

HanButterfly: Goodnight, Sam!

BethWash: night sam!

josh_wash: dont let the bedbugs bite!

TheOriginalMatt: See you bright and early tomorrow!!

.Sam.Giddings.: See you at the airport/lodge, guys!

xXGamerChrisXx: Night!

.Sam.Giddings. has left the chat.

BethWash: its cute because you like eachother chris

xXGamerChrisXx has left the chat.

HanButterfly: Aww, don't tease the poor guy!

TheOriginalMatt: Chris says goodnight, as do I! Can't wait to see you all tomorrow!

BethWash: night guys!

TheOriginalMatt has left the chat.

josh_wash: night!

Mike_Munroe: Make sure to save me a slice of that cake, Han! I gtg!

Mike_Munroe has left the chat.

HanButterfly: Goodnight Mike :)

EmilyD_: We'd best be off too. See you all in the morning.

_Jess.Riley_: Night x

EmilyD_ has left the chat.

BethWash: night

HanButterfly: Goodnight x

josh_wash: night xxxxxxyzqvp

_Jess.Riley_: Ha ha, very funny. Get that one from Chris?

josh_wash: lol night

_Jess.Riley_ has left the chat.

BethWash: PLEASE can i have some more cake, han?

josh_wash: you guys can literally just talk if you wanted

HanButterfly: Nope! Gotta' save some for Mike~

BethWash: you wont shut up about that for the rest of the evening now, will you?

BethWash: lol

HanButterfly: :P

josh_wash: you guys gossip in the kitchen

josh_wash: imma head to bed

BethWash: night bro

HanButterfly: Sleep well!

josh_wash has left the chat.

BethWash: please?

HanButterfly: No :P

BethWash: ugh night sis

HanButterfly: Night, Beth! XD

BethWash has left the chat.

HanButterfly has left the chat.

[thebookwormfairy]

What if Marinette had a Retired Police Dog Part 2

I've have had so many request for more Captain, so here you go. Also I just want to say thank you to the maribat community for adopting Captain into the community. Hopefully I do him justice.

Damian really did not want to say goodbye to Marinette yet, but as the sun dipped behind the buildings Marinette had to return to her hotel

Standing in front of the doors of her hotels they said their goodbyes

Marinette: Thanks for the great time Damian. Captain and I had a blast

Damian: I'm glad to hear that and really the pleasure was all mine

Damain bend down giving a kiss the the back of Marinette's hand

Marinette felt the blush grow on her face

Marinette: Will I be able to see you again?

Damian: Of course Angel maybe we can meet again tomorrow I can bring my dog Titus.

Marinette: Sure here's my number I can text you when I have free roam

Damian: I'll be waiting Goodnight Angel, Captain

Damian gave a little salute to the german sheperd

Captain gave a bark in goodbye while Marinette gave a little wave before heading into the hotel

Damain watch her walk away with a dreamy smile on his face until he couldn't see her any more.

Turning around Damian was met with the sight of his brothers all with teasing smiles on their face

Damian now scowling: Shut up morons

Dick: We didn't say anything baby bird

Damian: Your face did

The rest of the way home was spent teasing Damian about his lady love and Dick dramatically called her

Once Marinette had settled down after their day out she settled on her bed and made a call that was meant to be made earlier in the day

Dialing the number she looked up earlier she waited for the person on the other end to answer

Receptionist: Hello thank you for calling Wayne Enterprise, this is Cheryl how can I help you?

Marinette: Hello, I'm sorry for calling you so late, but I'm going to be in the French school trip group coming to tour the building tomorrow and I just had a quick question

Cheryl who was told by Dick earlier about Damian's little girlfriend knew exactly what to do

Cheryl: No problem sugar let me transfer you over to your tour guide. He can answer any question you might have.

Cheryl put Marinette on hold before she could protest about bugging the tour guide and made a call to Dick's cell phone

Dick: Hey Cheryl what do you need

Cheryl: Hey Dick so that girl you were telling about called me, with a question

Dick: No way. Connect her

Cheryl: Right away

Dick to his brothers: Guess who's on the phone

Jason: Damien's girlfriend?

Dick: Ding ding ding we have a winner

Marinette from phone: Hello?

Dick: Yes hello this is Mr. Grayson. How can I help you?

Marinette: Hello I'm Marinette and I'm so sorry for calling so late, but I had an important question to ask.

Dick: Don't worry Marinette, what's your question

Marinette: Well you see thanks to unforeseen circumstances my dog is actually with me on the trip. He's not a service dog, but he's really well trained and well behaved, and I was wondering if I could bring him with me on the tour. If the answer is no that's totally okay

Dick *thinking*: Omg she's adorable

Dick: That's completely fine. We have employees bring their dogs to work all the time. One more dog in the building won't make any more trouble

Marinette: Really thank you so much. And again I'm soooo sorry for calling so late. Have a goodnight

Dick: You too, I look forward to seeing you and your dog tomorrow

Dick: omg Baby Bird your girlfriend is sssooo adorable she was so sweet and shy and polite. I swear if I was talking to her in person I would have squeezed the life out of her

Damian: Don't you dare. You would just freak her out and make her never want to talk to me ever again

Tim: So you want to see her again?

Jason: It's sound like our Demon Spawn has found his true love

Damian could feel his face turn red

Damian: Shut up you idiots

Marinette: Good news Captain you're going to be able to come on the tour tomorrow

Captain gave Marinette a lick on the cheek to show that he understood and was happy about it

Marinette: Goodnight Captain. Goodnight Tikki

Tikki: Goodnight Marinette. Goodnight Captain

Marinette wrapped her arms around Captain snuggling her face into his fur as Tikki laid down on top of Captain

The next day

The class all gathered down in the lobby Marinette and Captain came down last but on time

And of course since Marinette looked happy and had Captain with her Lila had to throw a hissy fit

Lila: What are you doing Marinette. They probably don't allowed dogs at Wayne Enterprise

Ms. Bustier: She's right Marinette you shouldn't bring your dog with you. Captain will have to stay here.

Marinette: But Ms. Bustier I made sure to call ahead of time to make sure it was okay. And you wouldn't want Captain to be locked into a small room all day would you

As Marinette said that Captain looked to Ms. Bustier with the biggest puppy dog eyes he could muster

Ms. Bustier looking into Captain eyes and just couldn't say no

Ms. Bustier: Fine, but he's your responsibility Marinette, and I don't want to see any funny business between either of you. If I see either of you step a toe or paw out of line Captain will be spending the rest of his time in your hotel room. Am I understood?

Marinette: Yes Ms. Bustier! Thank you so much.

Marinette gave a big smile to her teacher before heading back to the class. Standing in the back of the group little away from every one.

Marinette: Dont worry Captain we just have to get through the tour then we can go meet up with Damian again, and we get to meet his dog Titus this time.

Captain gave her another quick kiss on the cheek when he heard somebody approach them

Adrien: Marinette why do you have to cause so much trouble. Captain would have been perfectly fine in the hotel room for a day

Captain forced his body between Adrien and Marinette not wanting the rude boy near his girl

Marinette: well good morning to you too Adrien. I don't see how having Captain with me is causing any problems. He literally only interacts with me. And for your information Captain would not be okay in the hotel all day today and then have to do it again tomorrow. Yesterday I made sure to call all the places we're going to over the trip to find out of Captain could along or not. Since we're spending all day tomorrow going to different museums he won't be able to come with us it would be cruel to lock him up all day 2 days in a row

Adrien: But he's still upsetting Lila, you know could happen if she gets too upset.

Marinette: I don't think a butterfly could fly across the Pacific Ocean Adrien, much less in the time frame we'll be here

Ms. Bustier: Okay everyone let's all get on the bus

Marinette: you better go ahead Adrien. You probably want go sit with your FRIENDS

Adrien catching onto what Marinette was hinting at gave her a small glare, but still ran to catch up to Nino, Alya, and Lila

Captain pressed his head into Marinette's side and tikki did the same.

Marinette: Thanks guys I'm okay

Marinette put one hand on Captain's head and the other on top of her purse

Damian checked over him and Titus one more time to make sure they both looked good

Bruce: I don't suppose your suddened interest in how you and Titus look have anything to do with that little French girl you met the other day

Damian: Don't be ridiculous father-

Dick: It totally does! You should have seen how those two looked at eachother. It was like love at first sight

Damian: GRAYSON!

Jason: it was so ridiculously sweet and she evan has her own dog, a german sheperd

Damian: TODD!

Tim: I did a bit more research, you know to make sure she wasn't a villian in disguise, and according to the adoption records his name is Captain and he use to be a police dog

Damian: DRAKE!! Would you all just stay out of my love life!

Bruce: They just care about you Damian. Weither you like it or not. You should have seen them when Dick first brought home Cori.

Once they got to Wayne Enterprise the family went their separate ways to complete their duties

Damian and Titus hung around Dick waiting for Marinette, Captain, and her class to arrive.

Cheryl: So I heard that you met somebody special yesterday Damian

Damian: wait how do you know about Marinette? Dick???

Dick: Well I had to tell her in case Marinette called yesterday I wanted to be the one she talked to.

Damian: Do you have to share my love life with everybody you know

Cheryl: It's just because we love you Damian. Now tell me everything.

Damian was about to respond with a sarcastic comeback when the class arrived

Dick: Hello welcome to Wayne Enterprise, I'm Dick Grayson I'll be your tour guide today. And this is my little brother Damian and his dog Titus. I hope y'all don't mind but he'll be joining us on your tour today

Ms. Bustier: Not at all it's always nice to make new friends when you're some where new

Damian made his way towards the group his eyes set on Marinette who just walk in after making sure Captain did his business before the long tour, but was intercepted by Lila.

Lila: Hello I am Lila it is nice to meet you

Lila began to speak with a heavy Italian accent.

She was the worst at speaking English in the class

The rest of the class finished introducing themselves when Marinette made it to the group

Damian: It's nice to meet you all, Marinette mentioned she was here with her class.

Alya: Marinette?

Marinette: Damian?

Damian flashing a charming smile: Hey Angel, I hope you don't mind but I found out my brother giving the tour for your class and asked if I could come along.

Damian walked over to Marinette and Captain with Titus following him

Damian: Hello Captain, how are you doing buddy?

Damian slowly lowered his hand giving Captain plenty of time to move away incase Captain didn't want to get a pat from him

Captain decided he would allow it partly because he had to admit he kinda like this kid, and partly because he knew it would freak out some of her class

Kim: Ah he touched Captain

Kim sadly learned the hard way that it took a while for Captain to warm up to someone new

Marinette: And this handsome boy must be Titus

Marinette held her hand out to let Titus sniff her.

Titus being the loving goofball he is gave her hand a big lick before snuggling his head into her hand

Marinette giggling: Well he's a friendly boy huh

Alya: You two know each other?

Marinette: Yeah we met yesterday at the park and just hit it off

Lila with a strained voice: Well isn't that great that you were able to make a new friend.

Damian and Marinette noticed the strain in Lila's voice but it didn't seem like anybody else had or if they did they ignored it

Dick: Alright everybody with introductions out of the way let's get started

Damian and Marinette fell to the back of the group so the can walk side by side with their dogs

While this was going on Titus and Captain were sniffing eachother out as they walked together

Captain: Hello I'm Captain

Titus: I'm Titus. I have just met you, and I love you

Titus gave Captain a big lick on the side of his head

Captain: That's great... So he's your boy

Titus: Yep he's been my boy for years now. He acted like he didn't like me at first but I knew he loved me

Captain: Is he your first human?

Titus: Yes, his father gave me to him when I was 7 months old. What about you, is she your first human?

Captain: No, my girl didn't find me until I was 3 years old. Before her i was a police dog. My partner was my first human. He was a great man and a great police officer. He always made sure I was well fed and when it was a slow night he would take me to the park and play fetch with me...

Captain trailed off his mind going back to the night he lost his partner

Titus: What happened to your first human?

Captain snapping out of his memories: I don't like to talk about it

Titus: Well what about your girl, how do you like her?

Captain: My girl is the best. She saved me from the pound. Her parents brought her there for one of the adoption events, at the time I didn't even know if I wanted another human. I was there for a couple of months, and didn't really have much hope to find a new family. Most people just go for the puppies. So I was just sitting in a corner away from everybody else when this girl comes walking towards. She seemed so sad at the time, like me. She asked me if I wanted to be alone together with her, and i looked into her eyes and something just clicked you know? Like she was also suppose to be my person. After that life turned around for me. My girl just has so much love to give.

Titus: I know what you mean it was the same with me and my boy. Do you have any siblings or a mate?

Captain: No my girl and her family live in a small apartment, so one big dog is their limit. I wouldn't mind having a mate one day though. I do have a couple of friends in Paris and the local dog park, and there's Fang, who's crocodile

Titus: you have a crocodile as a friend cool. I have one older sister Ace, no mate myself yet. I do also have a cat and cow as a friend

Captain: Nice

During the tour Damian noticed that some of Marinette's classmates (Alya, Adrien, and Lila) kept shooting dirty looks back at his Angel

He did his best to not glare back at them, but when Adrien did it for the 10th time on the tour when Marinette wasn't doing anything but softly giggling at stuff Damian whispered in her ear Damian had enough

The next time Adrien looked back at her Damian gave him the scariest look he could muster, which is very scary

Adrien widened his eyes and turned his head around quickly not looking back for the rest of the tour

Dick seeing about half of the interaction assumed that Damian glared out of jealousy and shot him an amused looked when he caught Damian's eyes

After the tour Marinette convinced Ms. Bustier to let her go off with Damian for their free roam

Ms. Bustier let her but made sure she wore the tracking bracelet so incase something happened she would know where Marinette is at

Damian and Marinette decidind to go to a near by dog park to let the dogs roam free

On the way out Damian noticed Adrien quickly walking over to them with a determined look on his face

Not wanting to deal with the annoying blonde Damian quickly guided Marinette outside and into the car

Marinette already figuring out whi Damian really was didn't question it and just let Damian lead her into the car

Damian: I thought you'd be a little more shocked about it

Marinette: I kinda figured it out when Mr. Grayson said you were his little brother

Once they made it to the park the dogs started to run around together and seem to play a game of chase even though Captain seemed a little more reluctant to act a bit crazier like Titus

Marinette: Well it seems like they like eachother

Damian watching Titus give Captain a big lick on the side of his head before running off leaving Captain with what could only be described as disgruntled look on his face.

Damian chuckling: Yeah they sure do

The pair spent another 2 hours at the park going back and forth with sitting in the shade watching their dogs run through the nice dog park and playing fetch with a stick the dogs found

They spent the rest of the afternoon wondering around Downton Gotham Damian showing Marinette all the best sites

As sunset came Damian found himself once again standing in front of the hotel holding Marinette's hands as Captain and Titus watch the interaction

Damian blushing: I've had a great time today Marinette

Marinette: So did I

Damian: I was wondering if you would like to go out to dinner with me tomorrow night, like a date?

Marinette also blushing: I would love to, but can Captain come along

Damian: Of course beside Captain is going to be stuck in your hotel room all day tomorrow it wouldn't be fair to make him stuck in a small room for even longer.

Marinette gave him a beaming smile: Thank you for understanding Damian

Damian: Of course I'll pick you up tomorrow at 7 wear whatever you like.

Marinette hugged Damian goodbye giving him a peck on the cheek as she pulled away

Marinette: I can't wait! Goodnight Damian I'll see you tomorrow

Damian in a dreamg voice: Goodnight Marinette, Captain

Once Marinette and Captain were out of site Damian jumped up and gave a whooped of joy completely forgetting that Alfred could still see him from the car.

Bonus

Alfred on the phone with Bruce: It looks like Damian just asked her put and she said yes

Bruce on the other side of the phone silently fist bumped the air mouthing yes over and over again

Bruce in a monotone voice: That's good

Dick: omg you guys I wish you were there! They spent most of the time quietly whispering to each other and Damian glared at a boy who kept glancing at Marinette it was the cutest thing.

@mikantsume @carrisarune @strudelqueen @Aloha_Posts_Stuff @shmowl @maxdark158

[paradise-creator]

Hellooo!! I love love LOVE the diamond box matchup you did!! You're amazing!! Your blog is incredible!! Now I'm here for a romantic haven box Haikyuu matchup pls🥺

Appearance: My name is Kay! She/her, black, straight, 5'1, I have a slightly athletic & curvy-ish figure (lol idk), short-ish hair(like mid-neck), dark brown eyes, shoe size 9, I like to dress comfy so I'm always in oversized hoodies, sweatpants, sneakers, sweatshirts and shorts. I like colorful clothes too, high waisted jeans and shorts and boots. I'm not very fashionable but I try lol.

Personality:

Basics: infp-t, Hufflepuff, Taurus sun, scorpio moon, sanguine, chaotic good, ambivert.

Some positive traits: I'm optimistic, friendly, energetic, organized, enthusiastic, observant, happy, open-minded, loving, encouraging and inquisitive!!

Some negative traits: I'm annoying, perfectionist, insecure, forgetful, easily distracted, kinda lazy, argumentative, too nice at times and clingy.

I love learning new things!! Currently I'm learning Korean, how to draw, how to paint and songs on the saxophone.

When I'm up for it, I love fun physical activity!! Going for a hike, going to the gym, bungee jumping, mountain climbing, going camping and etc :D

Although I love going out, nothing beats lazy days at home. I can spend hours by myself and still be happy. When alone I usually sleep or watch a movie/anime or practice my drawing or saxophone or try and learn something new!

I have a horrible memory and can never remember important dates 😭 I've forgotten my own birthday a few times (rip) so people can get mad at me for missing appointments, forgetting birthdays and other important days. I try my best to organize everything necessary on my phone calendar so I can be reminded.

I love seeing people happy! Nothing can fulfill my day more than knowing I put a smile on someone's face! I usually try my best to help out anyone who needs it and to the best of my ability! This has led to me getting taken advantage of in the past but I can't help but try and make others happy. I've developed a thicker skin and some trust issues as I've grown up because of it.

I love hyping my friends/family up!! Do you need a boost in confidence? Here I am, ready to help you remember the absolute king/queen/royalty that you are!! I'm usually very energetic and enthusiastic about many things and I love spreading positivity around!!

My love language is physical touch! So touch is very important to me in my relationships. Though I am insecure so I tend to think that I smother the people I care about with too much affection idk lol. I live for hugs and cuddles and hand holding 👉🏿👈🏿 but because of that I feel like I'm very clingy and annoying skskfksjd

I'm introverted in nature so although I mean usually full of energy and love making new friends, I can't do it for too long lol. My social battery runs out really fast and I have to hide away and recharge before I can be fully social again, otherwise I won't be my best self. I treasure personal time and understand when people need time for themselves too.

I love spontaneity!! I love living in the moment and doing stuff just for the hell of it!! Wanna go on a road trip? Dance in the rain? Build houses for charity? Go to McDonald's at 2am? Go on a long walk? SIGN ME UP!!

I can also be lazy and unmotivated to do stuff. If something doesn't interest me, I'd find myself incapable of doing it or I'd do it with great difficulty. I'm one of those 'do something when inspiration/motivation hits you otherwise it'll be absolute shit' types.

But when I do have motivation/inspiration that's when my perfectionism comes in and I have to do it in the best possible way and anything less is an insult to me, my family, my ancestors and descendants lmaoo. Unfortunately I subconsciously set a very high bar for myself which can be overwhelming and stressful but when I manage to produce work of that quality, it's very satisfying and rewarding jshkshdhsj

I have more to add but I feel like this is getting way too long 💀 lemme just move to the next section heheheh

Hobbies: I LOVE listening to music, learning new things, watching movies/anime, sleeping, reading, writing, playing saxophone (I'm still learning tho lol), swimming, drawing, journaling, making friends, and cooking!

My music taste: any type of rock (punk rock, grunge, j-rock, metal), pop, KPOP, RnB, jazz, dubstep, lofi hip hop, rap, trap, krnb, anime OP's and bangers from: Elvis, the beach boys, Queen, Khalid, Ateez, Harry styles, Kendrick Lamar, p!atd, mcr, fallout boy, Nirvana, BTS, mxmtoon, Marianas trench, twenty one pilots, stray kids, Jay Park, crush, Dreamcatcher, Skrillex, MJ, troye sivan etc

Fun facts:

I'm more of a cat person but I live dogs and think they're adorable!!

I have four piercings and I plan on getting more soon!!

I'm a night owl, and get super grumpy in the mornings especially when woken up unexpectedly >:/

Although I love making friends, I only have like 1/2 super close friends and like 20+ acquaintances lol

I want to get a tattoo soon but idk what to get :(

I'm super addicted to coffee (rip) and if I don't take some for some time (like a week) I'll get the worst migraines and I won't feel better until I drink some coffee 😭

That's it!! I hope i wrote enough stuff!! Did I leave anything out? If you need more pls tell me and I'll send another ask :D Take your time!! I'm in no rush. I'll patiently wait even though you get writers block or have a large amount of asks 😌 pls stay safe and healthy!! Drink lots of water, sleep well and have an amazing day/night!! 💙✨

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Hello and Welcome my Starlight!

The Haven box includes:

- Match up

- Sun drop

- Journal of Feelings

- 3 am shenanigans

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

I'd match you up with

Sugawara Koushi, Vice-captain of Karasuno

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Sun drops

- OKAY so like, as I read your description I thought of Akaashi or Yaku or Sugawara

- Me being the indecisive author I am had trouble picking

- But then I remembered that you loved to do spontaneous things.

- And that's when I realized that Sugawara is THE ONE

- You two would be deemed the "3 am couple"

- Or in the team it would be "Epitome of Chaos"

- He takes care of you

- He will alway remind you that you don't need to be perfect

- Insecurities? BE GONE

- Nagativity? BE GONE

- That's basically his motto

- He is both your mom and partner in Crime

- did I mention he will take care of you?

- CUDDLES AND KISSES FOR DAYS

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Journal of feelings

- Once this man realizes that you LOVE physical affection. He will give it to you. EVERYTIME HE SEES YOU

Kay entered the gym to watch her boyfriend play. She tried sneaking in and so far it has been great. She thought she was off the hook but then felt a familiar arms wrapped around her waist. "I found you~" Sugawara said with a smile.

- You both would often plan pranks and majority of the times, it would succeed

"Okay okay, so what are we doing today?" Kay asked the silver haired male. "Oh~ maybe we can scare Asahi or anyone for that matter with a beetle?" Sugawara suggested. "That's--no," Kay responded.

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3 am shenanigans

It’s 3 am in the morning. Almost everyone is fast asleep or in their homes, well almost. The night sky is littered with diamond in the sky. The streets were silent but it was comforting. A few people walked here and there. And a few cars passes by there and here. “What are we doing up so late?” A silver haired man said as he yawned. “We’ll be going to Mc Donald’s! What else?” The female responded as she smiled at him. “Is it even open at this time?” He asked. “Koushi, darling, it is open,” Kay, the lover of our beloved silvered male man said as she smiled. Sugawara chuckled and held her hand, the smile on his face was evident. “You know, we should be sleeping by now right?” He said as he pulled her closer. “And so what? I wasn’t planning on sleeping early! I slept the whole day yesterday and missed the chance to hang out with you,” The girl responded.

A small blush appeared on the male’s face and he giggled. “That’s very sweet bu-“ He was about to say but was silenced by the girl. “That was very sweet but we could’ve done this later on or tomorrow. Well, sorry to break it to you, Love. But, we are here,” She said as she pulled the male inside the fast food chain. And soon enough, the two got their orders and enjoyed their meal. “I don’t know why but this hits different,” Kay said as she eat a French fry. “It really does. Especially since you are here,” Sugawara stated as he patted her head. Now, she was the one blushing. As the two chatted, the other customers and staff glanced at them every now and then. None of them were annoyed at their interactions. On the contrary, they enjoyed watching them,

Some felt envious of their relationship. Some dreamt to have something like that. And others remembered the times of old. The two were so sweet, it’s almost too much. Laughter and chattering echoed through the building from both the couple and the people around them. Then they were dub the “3 am couple” as the two would often venture in that restaurant at 3 am in the morning.

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Author's note

I'm so so sorry for the long wait! This week has been hectic. Anywho, I hope you enjoy this matchup~ and thanks for requesting!

[e11evenkeys]

Pitch: The Adventures of Danger Rabbit- Chapter 2 Friendly Friendly (part 1)

Long story short, my dad wasn't arrested. Ms. Harper made her displeasure quite clear as far as my new form was concerned, but I wasn't taken away. Because of my mistake, dad had a reputation for being a careless father, and I was seen as a delinquent. Teachers started watching our family like we were career criminals, but dad raised me to be a good kid.

Regardless of the truth, I had a reputation that stuck with me as I grew up. Even into my junior year of high school, kids thought I was bad news. It didn't help that I had the worst luck imaginable, unlike Mr. Nickels, who I still had yet to find. Trouble seemed to seek me out. Just the simple act of walking home from school was dangerous enough to warrant fear of chaos. Freak accidents were a norm, and they only fueled the fire when it came to the negative light everyone shined on me. Of course, my dad always had the worst end of the fiascos because he had to deal with the aftermath.

If I had any luck at all, it was spent when I had the fortune of finding my two best friends.

B James was a girl who moved to town after my accident. Her parents were professional magicians, so naturally, I tried to get in good with them. I had hopes of them helping me. It turns out I didn't have to work too hard. BJ was fascinated with my form and impressed with my ability to create my own magic. I told her I didn't mean to transform myself, but I don't think she cared. She wanted to make new spells like her parents, and I suppose she thought I could help her. She overlooked how the rest of the school avoided me, but that might have been easy, considering no one flocked to her lunch table any more than my own. Remember when I said creating new magic was dangerous, well, BJ didn't care. We hadn't even graduated high school yet, but she'd created more spells than a person could count. It's important to keep in mind most of those spells had adverse effects or didn't do what they were meant to, but they did something.

My friend Wesson, a satyr I met in my freshman year of high school, didn't use magic at all. To be fair Fae, because of their natural abilities, didn't need magic as much as humans did. Even I had natural powers after my transformation like super hearing and invisibility. Which I'm sure is how Mr. Nickels managed to avoid capture for so long if he also possessed the same abilities. Wes being a satyr, was super fast and super strong, among other things, whether he appeared to be or not. We became friends after I tried to join the school's Creature club. There weren't many Fae that went to our school, so the club was meant to be a way of letting them all meet one another. Unfortunately, when I tried to join the club, someone pointed out I was born human, and that I was only what I was because I cursed myself. I couldn't join the club. Technically they weren't allowed to exclude anyone, but I thought it best to pick my battles wisely and let it go. Wes, being the best guy in the world, found me the next day and told me he thought the other kids were dicks for not letting me join the club. From that day on, I couldn't remember a time I couldn't fall back on the friendship Wes and I had.

It was two weeks till summer break. All of the ends of the year testing was out of the way, so everyone was waiting for the school year to come to an end. That Friday afternoon, I decided to walk BJ home. Despite my being close to Wes and BJ both, they never seemed to like one another. Every day I'd have to make a conscious decision whether to hang out with BJ, who loved playing magician and getting into trouble, or Wes, who was basically the brother I never had. BJ won that day because Wes had a meeting with the principal.

BJ should have taken the bus home, but I guess that would have been less time she got to work out new magic with me. We took a lot of back roads that day that eventually spit us out into the Dead Woods. It was the town's biggest forest, and it sat in the middle of everything. We learned in history class that old settlers named it the Dead Woods because back in the early days, when people were still coming up with most of the modern magic, they had to go far away from homes and buildings so bad magic wouldn't destroy anything. A lot of people died out there. Despite the bad history, it was a beautiful place as long as you knew where you were going.

"So there's this summer internship I read about," BJ said as we walked under branches while leaves crumbled under our footsteps.

"What kind of internship?" I asked.

We stopped walking so she could take her spell book out of her bag. The pages of her hand made spiral held weight and took time to flip through.

"For magicians. I thought you might want to go for it," she added.

"You want me to be a magician?"

"You created a working transmutation spell when you were 11."

I laughed at her, calling it a "working spell."

"Yea, and I've been trying to undo it ever since," I said with my amused tone still vocal.

"I could help you."

"I don't want to be a magician," I said in my most definitive voice possible.

"But I do."

I took a few steps away. I didn't want to stand too close while her book was out. Some of the stuff in that thing didn't need words to be activated. As she flipped through the pages, there was a danger similar to throwing a grenade into a kid's birthday party. Pages glowed and faded as her hands turned them over. I'm not sure how she managed to carry something around like that without constantly hurting herself.

"Then you should do it," I said as I crossed my arms and leaned against a tree.

She came near, and I knew to expect puppy dog eyes to fluff some kind of catch. That's what people do when they want something

"I need you."

I asked, "why," but she turned away.

"I need your spell," I thought she said, but I couldn't make out her words for sure, and with my big ears, that meant she was really quiet.

"What?" I asked.

"I need your spell."

I stood up straight.

"The spell that gave me fur and left with only eight fingers," I said before I continued with, " the spell that made my feet too big to wear shoes and ears big enough to hear my dad when he gets off at night."

"I have to submit a working spell to be considered."

"Then use one of yours," I said.

"None of mine work."

"What about the one you use to change your hair color?"

"It blinds anyone who sees me cast it."

"Then just use my spell, you don't need me for that, I wrote the words in some book, and I'll give it to you."

I wanted to get off the subject. Anyone who knew me knew how long I tried to find a cure for my curse. After years of turning over stones to no avail, of course, I gave up hope. That's not to say I didn't wish and dream for a way to change back, but being a bit of a pessimist meant I couldn't help but see the uneasy reality of how unlikely a cure was.

"It wouldn't be right to take credit for your work."

"But, it's alright to strong-arm your friend into an internship that'll take up our entire summer?" I didn't mean to sound nearly as argumentative or sarcastic as I must have at that moment, but it came out that way.

"There's a chance we won't even get it," she said, basically pleading with me at that point.

"If I say yes, will you leave me out of whatever experiments you're about to do?"

"But I had something special planned for today."

"That's my price."

"Deal, but you have to stick around to watch."

"In case something goes wrong?"

"I didn't say that."

"You didn't have to," I replied.

We exchanged a mutual grin before she adjusted her glasses and finally flipped around in her book to find the newly crafted spells. We spent most of the afternoon in the woods. BJ wrote a spell for growing plants faster, but it made anything made of wood burst into flames, including all the papers in my backpack. She tried to put out the fires with another spell meant to create rain clouds, but it summoned a swarm of butterflies that flew into the flames. Needless to say, they all died. They died quickly, but at least the fires went out.

By that time, it was getting dark.

"We should get moving," I said as I picked our bags off the ground burnt as they might have been.

"We will never speak of what happened here to anyone, right?"

"Like always," I said with a chuckle before handing BJ her ruined bag.

We started on our way out of the woods.

"Do your parents know you're applying for this internship?" I asked.

"Not yet."

"Don't you think they should know?"

"I'll tell them once I, " she started to say before I cut her off with, "did you hear that?"

"Hear what," she asked.

There was a sound coming from the bushes ahead of us. It was too big to be a cat, dog, or rabbit.

"Stand back," I said as I put my arm in front of BJ.

"Is someone there," I called out into the distance, but no reply was returned.

Only the rustling of the bushes broke the silence as something or someone came near. It was close. There was a momentary pause of nothing but the bugs around us falling silent, and then whatever it was lunged out at me.

It was Wes. He made me fall backward and rip the arm of my button-down shirt.

"Shit," I yelled out.

He tried to catch my arm on my way down, but he was too slow.

"Sorry, dude," Wes said with a laugh as he helped me to my feet.

"What are you doing out here?" BJ asked in a tone more annoyed than me, but I was the one with the ripped shirt.

"I need Pitch."

"Well, he's walking me home from school."

"Schools been out for 3 hours now, and you know how to get home."

"You want me to walk by myself," BJ asked.

"No one ever offers to walk me home, and we're the same age," Wes said sarcastically.

I cut in, "Wes, what did you need my help with?"

"I need your ears," he said.

"Let me get BJ home, and then I'll swing by your place."

Neither of them was even looking at me anymore; they were staring one another down.

"Alright, just make sure 'Bug Burner' isn't with you."

"You saw that!" BJ exclaimed.

"I'll be there, alone," I said as I held BJ back from Wes.

A few uneasy, and unwelcoming glances were exchanged before we took to our separate ways.

"I don't know why you hang out with him," BJ argued.

"Wes is cool," I said.

"Wes is just short of being a toddler. He doesn't use magic."

"I don't use magic."

"That's different; you can't afford it."

"That hurt," I said.

"You know what I mean."

[quokkalatte]

Affinity pt.2

Part 2

Category: Series

Pairing: Street Racer!Hoseok x Cat Hybrid! Reader

Warnings for this chapter: slight tiny mentions of blood and past abuse, slight language

Author's Note: Honestly this is mostly a filler chapter so it's just not that.....good? idk but I hope you enjoy ♡ as far as posting goes, it may be a bit before I get the next chapter out out I go back to school tomorrow and I'm working too so yeah XP

Tag List: @xinnieally @twilight-loveer @zhangyixingxing1 @jhopespanda @smeunjipark @kaguracysan @timberkat @wxnnabewitch @dust-er130 @sweetcoffeeblandtea @lokathefemale @fairy-lover13 @chari-a @olaxeiii @aejae-ssi @queenofthecliff @dragonwitchgaming @lifeisnorainbow @2seokkyo @chisana-himawari @serendipitiousbutterfly @unknownbluekey @katkit73 @bang-zero

Cannot be Tagged: @musicandbooksandfoodohmy @honeylovetae @lilacbaby11 @cat-the-caitlin @hobi_isadaydream

[Message me to be added to the tag list so you can be notified for future chapters]

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Hoseok waited patiently for you to finish your shower, sitting in the living room to get his heart rate down. He assessed the situation, he was now the owner of a hybrid, not only a hybrid, but one that has been through a lot and still manages to be completely innocent. He also assessed that he had absolutely no clue how to care for one. We're there regulations? Special diets? Oh no did he have to take you to get fixed? The actual thought of taking you to a vet had him experiencing waves of anxiety. He was so worked up that when you walked into the living room he didn't even notice.

"I'm finished" you say, and he jumps and looks up at you. You were clean, ears still slightly damp but had a small shine in the black and grey. Your tail, sticking through the baggy grey sweats, flickered nervously. Now that it was clean, be could see where the clumps had been pulled out. Some pink patches poked through and Hoseok's heart clenched uncomfortably at the sight, and he has reminded of your hands. He licked his lips, a nervous habit, and stood up and walked over to you. You watched him curiously,  and he hands came to your own, and you flinched slightly, but he turned them over.

The skin was a pale red color, the skin still freshly aggravated and probably caused pain. There were slight droplets of blood, but nothing to serious. "Does it hurt?" He asks gently, and you avert your eyes, staring down at your hands.

"No, it doesn't" it was a lie, that was obvious. Hoseok frowned, how many times had you had to keep your pain from Yeonsoo, afraid of being punished further.  

"It does kitten, and if you're hurt you should tell me. You won't get in trouble I promise" He says, and you nod. He let's go of your hands, and goes into the bathroom, rummaging under the sink and pulled out a med kit. When he returned to the living room, you were still standing  where he had left you. He gestured to the couch, taking a seat. You hesitantly sat next to him, your tail curling around your waist securely. He opens the med kit and sets it on the coffee table.  He takes the opened box of gauze and antibiotic cream, and a couple of alcohol patches. You frown, seeing that everything had been used before.  

"Do you get hurt too?" You ask, looking up at him. Hoseok shrugs, ripping open the paper of the patches and pulling out the potent cloth, the smell making you wrinkle your nose as it stung your nose.

"I get scratched a lot when I work with tools. I work as a mechanic and I'm bound to get cuts and bruises. This'll sting a bit, but it'll help" he says and presses the pad to your skin. You hiss, ears pressing flat against your head and tail clenching tightly. A small whimper followed as he wiped the other. Hoseok whispered out a couple of 'sorry' and 'it's okay you're doing great' and applied some antibiotic cream to them, which soothed the burn instantly. "I also used to race motorcycles, and I got road rash a couple of times" he added. You listened intently, your eyes looking up to his concentrated face. He wrapped your hands in the gauze, and when he finished, he gave you a small smile, which made you let out a small purr in thanks.

"Thank you master- I mean Hoseok" you correct yourself quickly and he laughs.

"No problem kitten. Now, there isn't much I can do for your tail, it's already healed" he says, and you glance down at your abused tail, and it flicks self-consciously. "But I'll ask Namjoon what I could put on it. His cat hybrid Jimin used to scratch his as a nervous habit before he was adopted, and Namjoon put something on it to heal the bare patches" he babbles.

"He would pull it when I wasn't paying attention" you told him, and he frowned

"Yeonsoo?"

"Yes. I would daydream, and if I wasn't listening or answer him, he'd pull it to get my attention. Or he did it if I messed up or did something wrong" your voice was quiet, and Hoseok wanted to comfort you, but he feared you'd flinch away if he tried to pet you.

"You don't have to worry about that anymore Y/n. Yeonsoo won't get his filthy hands on you ever again, not if I have anything to say about it" Hoseok says firmly, and a spark of warmth crept up his spine when you smiled radiantly at him. He returned a small one back."Let's get you to bed"

You had instantly curled up as soon as you fell on the bed, pulling the blanket over yourself and closed your eyes. Hoseok stood in the doorway for a moment. You looked so small, and the baggy clothes didn't help either. You just looked so fragile and he had the same urge to protect you like he did the first time he saw you. A lot has happened in in the past few hours. He made sure you were firmly asleep before walking down the hall and into his own bed to sleep.

There was a dilemma when he dressed for work in the morning. You'd be left alone, and he wasn't sure if he liked the thought of that. You laid out on the couch, stretching out in a cat-like way as you watched him throw on his uniform and pour coffee into a thermos as he rambled on about leaving you at home alone. He was a very interesting human, one that could keep his cool and act nonchalant one moment, and completely be flustered and inadequate the next.

"I don't mind staying at home alone Hoseok, honest" you peer at him from fallen on your face. Hoseok glanced at you, buttoning the navy shirt of his uniform and a piece of bacon dangling from his mouth. You giggled at the sight, and he quickly chewed the rest of the bacon.

"Are you sure? I feel guilty, I could take you in with me" he says, a bit to himself. You wrinkle your nose in distaste.

"No offense Hoseok, but the thought of spending the day in a shop that reeks of motor oil and sweat isn't my idea of a fun time." He laughed and you sat up, taking a piece of bacon and chewed it happily.

"Alright alright, I'm just nervous"

"Really? Couldn't tell. I'll be okay, I've been left alone plenty of times" you say, and Hoseok sighs, and nods

 "Okay kitten." He nods, and walks towards the front door, but freezes and turn back around.

"What do you eat?" He asks suddenly. You cock your head at him, confused.

"Uh, food?"

"What kind? What do you like? Is there a certain thing I should he feeding you?" He asks

"Lots of kinds. I like fish, but not crabs. I can't have regular milk, the fat content makes me break out into hives and I get a belly ache. Ma- He always complained I was expensive and cost him money to feed. I like almond milk even though it has a weird after taste." You say. "And they have supplements for hybrids, like vitamins but I don't need themas long as I get plenty of meat and liquids" you say. Hoseok repeats this under his breath, and nods.

"I don't have any almond milk, but I have fish sticks somewhere in the freezer. But help yourself to the fridge kitten what's mine is yours" he smiles at the way you grin. "I should be home around 5 okay?"

"Okay Hoseok" You yawn, already prepared to take a cat nap in the patch of sun that peeked through his blinds. Hoseok chewed his lip, still unsure of leaving you alone, but you looked content enough, so he grabbed his car keys and headed out to the garage.

 "I'm telling you Hobi, it's a piece of shit. I don't know why you continue to drive it" Kim Taehyung scrunches his nose when Hoseok pulled into the shop. "And it's hideous as well" Hoseok rolled his eyes, stepping out and running a hand through his hair.

"Tae, your specialty is muscle cars, not race cars.  So shut up about my baby she's doing fine" Hoseok pats the hood of his beloved car. No, it wasn't the one he raced with, but it was an older car, and he was attached to it, he better be he fixed it from the ground up. Sure it likes to stall when turning on and the paint needs a new coat, but it was his child. Taehyung chuckles at Hoseok's words, taking a drink of his Pepsi.

"If you call two seconds away from falling apart 'okay' then sure, it's just peachy"

"Don't you have someone's oil to change" Hoseok says hauntily, and Taehyung huffs and slinks back to the back of the garage. Hoseok pulled the buliten down from his desk, checking the recent repos and bring-ins of the week. There had been at least 20 cars repoed for missing payments, which meant 20 angry phone calls he wasn't ready to deal with.

He worked diligently, the garage kept busy with fixing cars and getting them out to their respectable owners, and Hoseok was busy trying to negotiate with angry customers about getting their cars back.

"All you need to do is go to the Repo office off of Dowchien Street and file some paperwork, and pay the fee to get your car back" Hoseok sighed as the old woman cursed him about how she was missing several doctor's appointments and having to take the bus to go to the store. "Ma'am I just take and hold the cars, you need to go to the head office to get it back" Hoseok pressed his knuckles against his skull, rubbing the area as he was cursed out more before the lady finally realized that he wasn't going to give her car back without visiting the office.

"She sounded delightful" Namjoon grinned at Hoseok in the doorway of his office. Hoseok glared up at him, standing and stretching.

"Oh yeah, if you like hearing about irritatable bowel syndrome and bunions needing to be removed" Hoseok shivered and Namjoon laughed. "Put me in a car and on a road any day this day job shit is killing me" He groans.

 "You're the one who wanted to use the shop as a cover Hobi" Namjoon so wisely pointed out. "And you don't hate it either so quit your whining"

"No but I do hate angry people yelling at me for them not making car payments" Hoseok walked past Namjoon and entered the back of the garage. Taehyung and a couple of other employees bustled around repairing different aspects of the cars.

"Hmm if only everyone could see Seoul's Drift King now" Namjoon teases and Hoseok flipped him off as he reached into the mini fridge and pulled out a water bottle, taking a long drink. "So how's your kitty doing?" Namjoon asks

"Okay, I think. She's really jumpy, but she let me dress her hands, does that mean something?"

"Means she trusts you. Took me 3 months before Jimin would be in the same room as me. "

"She still flinches when I touch her though" he frowns

"Can you blame her? I'm not sure she's had a kind touch in awhile.  Give her time Hobi"

"You're right" Hoseok sighs.  "Do you still have that stuff you used on Jimin's tail?"

"Sure, I always keep some in case his anxiety acts up again. Why?"

"Yeonsoo did a number on Y/n's poor tail, she's missing clumps of fur"

"Asshole." Namjoon mutters darkly. "You should have seen him when you left. He got out of his car and vowed to exact revenge or some site evil villains say in the movies. But I'll bring a bottle over for you"

"Thanks, and I'm not too worried about him. I can handle him" Hoseok says.

"If you say so. We've got a new, ah, 'shipment' coming in on Tuesday, are to ready?"

"Aren't I always?"

Hoseok was relieved when he went home that night. He wondered if you were okay. Sure you've been left home before but it didn't feel right just leaving you to your own devices for the whole day in a new place. He stopped by and grabbed take out, not in the mood to cook anything for dinner. He parked in the garage and grabbed the take out, unlocking the door and entering the house. When he stepped in he sensed immediately something was off. It was too quiet. He frowned, glancing around the dimly lit hallway "Y/n?" He called out, inching into the living room. A creak had him on edge and tense. He grabbed a the baseball bat that leaned against the garage door, gripping it tightly as he entered the living room.

You were standing there, wide eyed and chest heaving with breath. Your fur was fluffed out to the max, and your eyes laid on the baseball bat. You wailed, throwing yourself to the floor in front of his feet and grabbed his legs. Hoseok yelped in shock, staring down at you.

"I'm sorry master I'm so so sorry! I w-was just walking and my tail hit it and it fell over! Please forgive me I know I'm a bad cat" you cried, pawing at his shirt and burying your head into his hip.

W-What? Y/n what are you talking about" he frowned, still confused. Your body wracked with sobs, your words incomprehensible. Hoseok set the take out on the counter and dropped the bat to the floor, the crash making you jump and squeak. He pried your hands from his shirt, and knelt down so you were face to face.  

"Calm down Kitten, just tell me what happened" he says slowly, and you whimpered.

"The vase. I broke it. I'm sorry" you say, cheeks puffy and tear tracks down your face.  Hoseok looks over your head and sees the vase that had been sitting on his TV Stand was smashed on the floor in a thousand pieces.  His eyes widened and he immediately began searching your body.

"Are you hurt? You didn't cut yourself did you?" He asks. You hiccup, frowning

"W-what?"

"Did you cut yourself on the glass?" He demands,  checking for any sign of blood.

"N-no I- you aren't mad?" You sputter, frowning. You were sure you'd face punishment for breaking his possession. You hadn't even been here long and caused an accident, and you thought for sure Hoseok would be angry and throw you out.

"No I'm not mad Y/n" Hoseok sighs in relief. "I'm just happy you aren't hurt."

"But....but I broke your vase" you frown at him.

"To be honest, you saved me a terrible story to explain to my sister why I got rid of the ugly vase she'd gotten me for Christmas. Now I can say my hybrid accidentally knocked it over" he smiles and you frown

"So I'm not being punished?"

"No it was an accident Y/n" Hoseok frowns and you nod your head in understanding. "Are you hungry?'

"A bit" you admit.

"Good. I brought home take out" he says, standing up and grabbing a broom and dustpan before sweeping up the broken vase, careful not to miss any pieces that could imbed themselves into any soft fleshed feet. You watch him as he worked, still slightly expecting to get yelled at, but after a few minutes you relaxed when it appeared it wouldn't come. Hoseok pulled down two plates, piling on steamed rice and chicken and vegetables and a bunch of assorted foods he always got when he ate take out. He pushed the bigger plate towards you, and you eye it doubtfully.

"Why did you give me your plate Hoseok?" You ask, pushing it back to him. Hoseok shakes his head, pushing it back.

"I didn't. It's yours."

But there's more food on it" you frown

"Yes, I'm not too hungry tonight, and I got extra for you"

"All of it?"

"All of it" He says firmly. You nod, still unsure but when you began eating, it was difficult to stop with all the tasty things he had gotten you, but you didn't touch the gross smelling stuff on the side of the plate. Hoseok noticed this, as he ate the very thing you wouldn't. "You don't like Kim Chi?"

"No. It's gross and vile" you say firmly and Hoseok pouted.

"I'm not sure how we'll get along from now on, I love Kim Chi" he says, and affronted look on his face, but a glimmer in his eye showed that he was kidding,  and you giggled.

"I don't know, guess you'll just have to stop then" you smile mischievously at him and he laugh

"I don't think so kitten" he snorts and continues to eat. Oh god, he thinks, I think I can probably handle her.