#and I fell out w some mutuals over a mistake I made and the person in question unfollowed me and although I regret falling out w the mutuals | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

svmjaeyvn · 7 months

Text

love maze, s.jy.

chapter four pairing: jake x afab!reader word count: tbd (series)

masterlist

add yourself to the taglist here!

genre: college!au, mutual friends, fake dating, smut.

synopsis: an unfortunate encounter, drunken mistakes, and a sort of (definitely) stalker leads jake sim ‘dating’ his best friend’s childhood crush.

or, your life gets intertwined with a rich boy’s in attempt to not get sued by his crazy personal fangirl and like with all good cliches, sex overcomplicates things.

contents: smut, sort of strangers to fuck buddies to lovers pipeline, childhood best friend!jay, mentions of best friend! yunjin, curly haired & mixed reader, uni!au, rich nepo baby!jake, enha frat boys, lots of kissing, fake dating turning into fwb real quick, totally way too into it for it to be fake early on, big booty reader that’s jake’s obsessed with, partying and alcohol use, slight violence, he fell first and harder trope, stem bf & writer gf, (kinda overly) possessive jake, some angst to spice things up, daddy issues, hyper independent reader who struggles with her feelings, fluff and happy ending!!

a/n: hello~ i’ve never been a tumblr girly but i have went through my w*ttpad era back in 2018 so bare with me y’all. this will be a series but not that long (i hope) so pls look forward to it. warning tags will be placed before each “chapter” to specify what to expect. pls pls reblog and interact, i’d love to have feedback and see what your thoughts are. okay! yay, for now enjoy and thank you sm :D

MDNI, 18+

tap below to continue

CHAPTER FOUR: FIRSTS

previous masterlist next

word count: 2.9k

warnings: alcohol, partying(what’s new), hints of needy jake, reader being a tease, established desire, highly suggestive themes

a/n: YEAHHH GET INTO IT moving it along now

"I GO HOME for three days and you suddenly have a new life?" Yunjin gapes, hands on her hips as you had just finished explaining the whole story in what happened between you and Jake. From the beginning of the creep at the store, which she was throughly upset that you didn't call her considering she didn't even get laid that night, to the agreement the two of you came up with yesterday.

You were in the process of getting ready, Jake having texted you earlier in the day asking if you were free. After talking over everything, coming up with a story down to the smallest details, and finding a middle ground in how this would work, Jake suggested at least once a week you two would go on a 'date.' In reality it was just hanging out, time to get to know each other better and have the ability to be comfortable with how you'd act in public from then on.

"Apparently," You snort, swiping one last application of lip gloss onto your lips. Puckering them before letting out a small sigh, decidedly put in enough effort for the mock date. "Good?"

Yunjin glances over your outfit. The denim jeans sat nicely on your hips, low rise exposing a good portion of your stomach along with the white baby tee, a brown oversized jacket on top with white shoes to compliment. The outfit was casual but cute enough to show some effort, showing off enough skin that emphasized your curves but also comfortable.

"You're hot," She nods, a wink added to the effect. Watching as you bent over to retie your shoe lace, a loud gasp left Yunjin's lips before her laughter filled the air. "You're trying to get laid aren't you!" Pointing toward the thin string-like material that poked out as you bent due to the low waistband of the pants, the brown thong you wore was exposed and something you didn't particularly wear without good reason.

Quickly standing up straight, a sheepish smile made way onto your lips, shrugging slightly. "Maybe, mind as well have fun with this, right?"

"Sure, fucking your already fake boyfriend sounds like a great idea that won't lead to any problems," Yunjin nods, voice dripping with sarcasm.

You smile, turning back around just as your phone pings. "Glad we agree," You nod, collecting your things as Jake was now waiting outside for you to head down, Yunjin rolling her eyes as she bids you goodbye with a playful slap to your ass as you walked past.

"Text me how it goes!"

JAKE HAD A hard time focusing. Maybe it was the colorful lights that blinked in every direction, or the loud buzz of other people who played along the rows and rows of arcade games, or maybe it was the fact that he got the perfect view of your ass in those tiny little jeans every time you remotely leaned over. He thought he was imagining things the first time you bent over, trying to convince himself that you hadn't been bold enough to wear a thin g-string in those already low pants that exposed the definition of your waist and the two dimples on your lower back.

Surely it wasn't planned, wearing a thin little thong under tight pants that left little to the imagination with how utterly perfectly perky your ass seemed squeezed in them. But it was, definitely was because although he hasn't worn one himself, he assumed having a string up your ass all day wasn't something you willingly did, knowing well enough it was for the view not your comfort.

It took everything in him to tear his eyes away every time you glanced back, though his continued slip ups caused you to grow rather amused. Feeling how his eyes practically bore into your back, you began to have fun with it. Whether it consisted of teasing him with the sway of your hips as you walked or ensuring to wiggle around more than usual when you bent over to place the tokens in the slots of the machines.

The current game the two of you played consisted of basketball, playing on the two player option to go against one another, rushing to beat the others score of how many baskets made in the 90 second period. Jake finished before you, having started a few seconds prior and he smiled seeing the 72 on his scoreboard while yours was slowly trickling up from a mere 48.

Just as he was about to comment on his obvious win, he took note of the two who lingered off the side, seemingly waiting for their turn at the game. Presumably within your age range, the two men stood patiently, one occupied by his phone but the other had his eyes set on you in specific.

From the way his eyes traveled up your body, slow without a care for how bluntly obvious it was to see him checking you out, Jake felt oddly in disbelief at how shameless his actions were. The loud buzz indicated the end of your round, the score finalized at a 54 as you turned around with a small huff.

"Cheater," You tut, your competitive nature beginning to show its colors as you turn to Jake who was now a mere few inches apart.

Quirking a brow, he points to his scoreboard, the big 72 in bold letters along with WINNER flashing after it. "Face it baby, I'm just better,"

You blink, slightly surprised by the sudden pet name while Jake leans in suspiciously closer than before. One of his arms snaked behind your waist, hand resting low on your back and the heat of his fingers against your exposed skin caused a chill to run up your spine.

"Don't be cocky, you're just taller so it's easier for you," You defend with a roll of your eyes, turning away from his gaze that made you want to squirm away. You could feel the sudden shift in his demeanor, one that you wanted to see but it also made you nervous.

Without a word, Jake shamelessly leaned closer. His lips pressed to the corner of your mouth, lingering there for a moment just missing your lips before he pulls away, moving to whisper in your ear. "Your little outfits catching eyes sweetheart,"

He had a smile on his features, a seemingly fond look thrown your way but you could see the hint of something other by his eyes. Glancing around for a moment, attempting to confirm what he was referencing, it wasn't until your turned your head momentarily did you see. From the corner of your eye, you could see the two who stood still waiting, one in particular unable to take his eyes off you no matter how shameless he seemed.

"Is that a problem?" You counter, voice just as quiet as his as you peer back to Jake. This time, the smirk that fell upon his features definitely wasn't in good nature, feeling as his hand slightly squeezed your hip at the words.

"Not at all, I have a hot girlfriend," Jake shrugs, his amusement dripping through his words. "As long as I'm the only one that gets to touch you, they can look all they want,"

Finding yourself at a loss for words, you shake your head at his comment. Breaking the tension that began to linger through the air, you loop your arm around his own and begin to lead the way towards another game in the opposite direction. Jake merely laughs, allowing for you to pull him along without comment.

"Didn't take you as the possessive type," Finally finding your voice as you pulled him along to a less busy area in the building, you stop at one of the claw machines.

"Didn't like the way he was looking at you," He shrugs, pulling two coins from his pocket and inserting them to begin the game. Now focused on the rather weird chick looking stuffed animal that sat at the top of the pile, Jake's tongue was poked out slightly at the corner of his mouth as he concentrated.

You watched, waiting for him to drop the claw before speaking. "Still possessive," You snicker, the stuffed animal being picked up for a few seconds before falling out of the metal grasp. Still, it fell significantly closer to the exit shoot and Jake began his second attempt that the coins bought him.

He merely hums back at your words, redoing his attempt and waiting patiently to watch as the claw picked up and dragged the chick toward the shoot, it falling down in success causing a small smile to fall upon his lips. Bending down to pull it out, Jake takes a glance over it before holding it out to you.

"Well, like it or not, you're mine for the next few months," He reminds. You half heartedly nod at his words, far too engrossed by your newest stuffed animal and picking off a piece of extra fluff around its eye. The baby chick looked rather awkward, far too round and compressed but it made you smile, happy with the weird looking stuffy that'll be added to the rest on your bed.

"I'm fake yours," You finally respond while he raises a brow.

Taking a note of how excited you got over a mediocre claw machine prize, Jake sighs at your words. "No one else knows that, so as far as I'm concerned, you're mine to make it known,"

You smile at his words, a sort of guilty pleasure in knowing just how much he intended to keep you by his side even if it were an unpleasant trait outside of anything fiction. With a small hum, you lace your fingers through his own, pulling him along.

"Careful Jake, someone might think you actually like me,"

"TRY NOT TO let her do a replay of last week, yeah?" Jay spoke rather loudly, leaned close to the couple after spotting them heading for the kitchen. You had been dragged along to the frat house after a call interrupted your date. Allegedly, Bianca had made an appearance to the party, running around making scenes in attempt to find where Jake was hiding out after avoiding her all week.

Heeseung had made it clear that he either needed to come home and kick her out himself, or he'd be throwing her in the pool if she came up to him again cockblocking the girl he was trying to talk up for the night. Thus Jake proposed your first real act in your relationship, something that you were slightly reluctant to but also couldn't pass up the opportunity of seeing Bianca lose her shit over you attached to his hip without room for her to do anything this time.

It didn't surprise you that there was yet another party going on at the house, the boys notorious for being the main party frat on campus. What did surprise you though, was the fact that Jake willingly chose to take you on a date rather than attend.

You rolled your eyes at Jay's comment, shoving his shoulder causing Jake to let out a laugh beside you. His arm was draped over your shoulders, keeping your body close to his own while his other hand sported a red solo cup, yet another jungle juice made by Sunghoon who knew what he was doing this time around. Meanwhile you held a spiked cup of pineapple juice and tequila, keeping the alcohol minimal and pacing yourself.

"Go away," You huff, shooing Jay away with the wave of your hand. Raising a brow, he takes a glance over the two of you momentarily.

"Don't be weird," Is all he says, the comment thrown to Jake who seemingly understood, shrugging halfheartedly but agreed with a nod. With a small sigh, Jay's hand reaches up to ruffle your hair and quick to pull away as you swatted the air. "Bye teeny, don't fight anyone!"

"He's annoying," You mumble, turning back to Jake who hummed in response.

"He cares," He says softly, taking a sip from his cup while you click your tongue.

"Yeah? Too much then," Glancing around, the dim lights that flashed throughout the house provided minimal visibility, mostly shadows of bodies rather than seeing faces. "How long is this public appearance supposed to last before I can head home?" Truthfully, the thought of your bed seemed ten times more appealing than the stuffy kitchen you stood in. Partially sure that you had seen a girl running by about to hurl, the sight solidified your belief of partying sporadically, it gets old fast every week in your opinion.

"You wanna go home?" Jake began to feel around for his keys but only to pause realizing the cup filled with a concoction of alcohols may have not been the best idea.

"Not now," You shake your head. "I can always call an uber later, or have Yunjin pick me up... or even stay with Jay I guess,"

“What, you don’t want to stay with your boyfriend?” Jake teases, leaning closer causing you to roll your eyes. Slightly pushing his face away with the palm of your hand, small giggles began to fall from both your lips and mixing together in a little world of your own that seemed far away from anyone else in the room. “I’m hurt, truly you should be wanting to spend the night with me.”

“I don’t think that would be a good idea,” You hum. Pushing away the few out of place strands of hair that fell onto Jake’s forehead, his eyes glinted at the suggestive tone while his hands sat comfortably on your hips. Moving to your tippy toes, you leaned up to whisper directly in Jake’s ear, the words and your warm breath that fanned against his neck causing a shiver to run up his spine. “We wouldn’t be getting much sleep,”

“You know, I think I’m actually getting a little tired right now,” Jake says quickly, you pulling away enough to make eye contact, his pupils visibly dilated at the thoughts running through his head. “I think we should head up early, could be a good bonding experience,” The cheeky smile that played at his lips didn’t go unnoticed while he squeezed your hip, one of his hands trailing down dangerously low just above the curve of your ass, lingering there without any intention of moving back up.

“I don’t remember that being a part of the contract,” You tease while Jake shakes his head. Maybe it was the low lighting of the party, or maybe it was the more than obvious way he had been looking to you all night that made you so comfortable to entertain the thought. Well that and the fact that Jake was admittedly hot, you had always had the tiniest attraction towards him the few times you met in the past. Plus, there had to be some truth to the rumors that clouded his name, most girls deeming him as some of the best they ever had and you couldn’t help but want to figure it out for yourself.

“Exactly, that means there’s no rules against it, right?” Jake persists. No longer hiding his growing desperation, you were sure he’d kneel down and beg if you asked. “C’mon baby, it’s a good thing you know, for couples to be intimate n stuff,”

“I feel like I’m gonna have to keep reminding you that this is fake,” You snicker, seemingly nonchalant but you took a long sip from Jake’s cup, attempting for some liquid courage to calm your rapid heartbeat.

“We can be whatever you want us to be,” He agrees, hand cupping your face, tilting up your chin up as he placed a light lingering kiss to your bottom lip. “There’s a reason you wore those tight little pants and if not me, you’re out of luck in having someone else take them off cause of your rules,”

A small hum left your lips, your bottom lip tucked between your teeth which caused Jake to look away, finding something else to focus on to push away the thoughts of what your pretty mouth would look like around him instead. Immediately regretting it, your attention was caught by the string of curses that he mumbled under his breath.

Frowning your brows, your head turns to see the culprit of his sudden change in mood. Feeling the same sentiment as you see the faux blonde who looked more than annoyed when your eyes locked, you had to resist the urge to act childishly and flip her off.

Suddenly turning toward Jake, you grab hold of his hand. Raising a brow at your change in heart, he allows you to pull him toward the stairs. “If I would’ve known you had a possession thing too I would’ve said she got here way earlier,” He smiles, visibly pleased at the turn of events and switching to lead the way to his room.

“I’m proving a point,” You huff back while Jake lets out a laugh at your words. Following his lead with no hint of hesitation, you ensure to send a sickeningly sweet smile toward Bianca who seemed to be on the verge of losing her poise.

You had to admit, following Jake up to his room and seeing the look of envy from so many faces boosted your ego in more ways than one. This is gonna be a long night.

my tags!! @slutforsjy @jaklvbub @whowantshota @addictedtohobi

( pls make sure your settings make you applicable to tag)

#enhypen jake #enhypen #jake enhypen smut #jaeyun x reader #sim jaeyun #jaeyun smut #jake x reader #jake smut #jake sim #enha x reader #enhypen smut

214 notes · View notes

kodzuken-chan · 2 years

Note

hello 💕 may i request how would sanji react to his s/o fighting for the first time.

like luffy brought a new member for the crew and when they all saw her she looked so cute, innocent, small, bubbly and really pretty but when the enemies and marines come the strawhats are chained and cannot fight leaving only the s/o.

but it turns out the s/o is extremely strong. her punches and kicks are much stronger than germa 66. and she is also a powerful swordswoman who carries a powerful scythe. and she is also able to transform into a demon, the most powerful demon to exist.

A/N: Oh my...this sounds exactly like the scenarios spinning in my head at 3am, oh well let's make them true then~😌

The last part is kinda very specific tho👀, but I did my best to meet your request~!!! so I hope you Like it~!!

I just never mentioned the Marines and instead made the scenario with a pirate enemy🤭

-------------------

🧁Cute & Wild🧁

Paring: Sanji x Fem.Reader

Genre: Action/ Slight Angst/ Fluff / Hurt-Comfort/ One-shot

Warnings ⚠️: Mention of blood, slight toture maybe, intense injuries and cuts, some insecurities

A/N: This is kinda predictable but its enjoyable 😌

-Got the vilian's name from a Vilian's name generator Lmao I was too lazy

- The Demonic references are inspired by Demon Slayer 😈

-May Contain few unnoticed mistakes

------------------

Summary: As the newest yet the cutest member that ever joined the strawhats, Everyone thought that you should be protected for how pure and sweet you were. However, an unfortunate incident forces you to unleash your hidden strength that will catch your crew off guard, especially your beloved Sanji.

------------------

Aside from your intelligence and strategic acumen, you assisted your crew by using it during the intractable times. You were cute, adorably tiny, bubbly and yet an innocent person, the crew even thought that despite anything and everything, you must be protected at all costs. Not that they're underestimating your capabilities of protecting and taking care of yourself, however you're appearance, morlas and personality made them think that, if the world had so many of you, everyone would have lived in peace.

Even though it hasn't been months since you've joined the crew, and being brought by Luffy to Sunny go, You were quick to get along with them, it just felt like you've known them for a long period of time. However, in that brief time, you fell for the Ship's cook, who appearntly had mutual feelings for you. You two would act bashfully around each other even though it was obvious for everyone on the ship that you both were in love, even you two acknowledged that.

You were walking back from the market after getting few needed supplies for your free time hobby. Usually when you yell "I'm back", Sanji would definitely swoon over to you with those heart shaped eyes, if he's not there, then one of the rest Strawhats will for sure show up, either saying something idiot, nagging about something or just ask you some stuff out of curiosity. However, once you got none of these but instead received silence, you got the chills and stepped inside calling for anyone of your crew mates.

"W-what....the hell....is this...." You said dropping the few bags you carried in your hands approaching Sunny's mass

(All of your precious crew mates alongside your captain are under my care, So if you want to set them free, then you should come over so we can have a little chit chat together)

Signed by: Megedagik Thug of the Seas

That what was written over the worn-out paper hanging by a dagger in the middle of the mass. You couldn't help but gulp at name written at the bottom of the letter, recalling unpleasant memories of the past. However, you had no time to think about these memories, saving your friends is your top priority task now, anything else can wait for later.

Placing the bags you got from the market earlier in your room, you grabbed your rabbit shaped backpack, and placed all what you thought might be in handy to save your friends, after all, you're going to approach the danger willingly. Nevertheless, you're aware that what you're heading to is a trap, you just knew what that 'chit chat' exactly meant.

Carrying your backpack, you went down to Franky's weapons development room to take your huge scythe, no one would ever believe that your tiny figure can carry that thing, and your crew mates never acknowledged that you're actually using it, and that its not just a keepsake of your loved ones.

Now that you've got everything ready, you need to find where your friends are at. Usually, you all depend on Chopper's strong smelling sense to find anything, or any lost members, however this time, you're all alone, and you need to find them using your own ways, so in order to do so, you had no other choice but to use your own ways.

These ways specifically are your demonic abilities, no one of the Strawhats knew about you being able to transform yourself into a demon, being a demon means that your visual, auditory and nasal senses are three times stronger than any human being, let alone your demonic strength, speed and felixblity which gives you the upper hand in any fight. Of course, you tried as much as you can to not make it very obvious, because you never wanted your only friends to fear and leave you just like the others did.

Using your extraordinary smelling sense, you were able to trace Nami's and Robin's perfume scent, you could smell abit of Sanji's cigarettes and Franky's cola scent in the distance as well, so you immediately started running to where the scent was coming from. One of your demonic abilities advantages is you can trace scents based on how strong or light they were, they can be visible for you in the forms of strings, the thicker the string was the stronger the scent is, and vice versa.

As you kept on following your friends scent, you recalled some of the old memories that happened to you in the past. Megedagik, also known as the Thug of the Seas, is a crule heartless pirate who sailed around, invading small islands causing havocs by torturing and killing innocents, which exactly resembles the meaning of his name. He was known for his brutal way of bloodshed, where he would kill men in front of their families, then takes some women to work for him, and takes the others in order to satisfy his sadistic self by exposing them to excruciating torture.

And 8 years ago, this obnoxious pirate that knew no humanity made his mind that your tiny island is his next spot of sadistic entertainment, but little he knew what was waiting for him there. After causing sabotage and murder, he gathered all of the village's women, as usual, sent some of them with his men to work under his command, while the others, including you, were taken to a place where he tortures his captives.

Once he sat on his wooden chair, he had that disgusting smrik on his face while watching the women getting tortured gruesomely. As a result of the torture and beatings you got from Megedagik's men while he sat there, the anger yet the hatred kept on accumulating inside of your heart, causing you to lose control over the not so long discovered demonic powers, and within seconds, that led you to to unleash your sudden transformation and pounce over him. In the upcoming few minutes, your rage attacks caused the crule pirate to lay unconscious which ended up frightening his men and escape with him to the sea since they had no other choice.

Even though you rescued all those who were held captives with you, however, they turned their back on you and hated it, they called you with names like monster, hideous and so many other names that you didn't wish to hear. By the end of that day, instead of thanking you at least for saving their lives, they expelled you from the village claiming that a demon shall bring nothing but fatality to this poor little island, this is how you ended up moving to another island, living alone while hiding your powers, until fate smiled to you when Luffy asked you to join his crew.

Your Nakama's scent took you way too far from the shores and the center of the island, to a secluded place full of tress, and there was a building in the middle of it, it looked like a huge warehouse. Taking a deep breathe, you walked towards the warehouse's huge wooden gate, and with rage, you broke it into halves making an epic entrance, all what you were able to see was black, however, the scent of your friends soon was replaced by the smell of their bloods.

"Spectacular and Wonderful, So you really came after all huh?" Scoffed Megedagik

"Y/N-CHAN!!! GET OUT OF HERE THIS IS A TRAP!!" you heared Sanji Screaming

"S-Sanji?!!" You called again unable to see where he was

But soon the light came on, exposing everyone and everything around you, which made you stunned in disbelief. There stood Megedagik in the distance across of you, your nakamas were dangling from the celling, it seemed that the devil fruit users were chained with sea stone chains since they looked drained from energy, while the rest of them were tied with ropes and cuffs, they looked like they've been awfully beaten up. Seems that Megedagik still uses torture as way of entertainment.

"Y/N!!!JUST DON'T WORRY ABOUT US AND GET OUT OF HERE!!" said Luffy to you but you smiled at him

"You shouldn't be worrying about me captain~!! The future Pirate King himself asked me to be a member of his crew, so if I can't protect him and my friends, what's the point of being with them if I'm just an obstacle in the way of their dreams? I'll be fine, trust me" you exclaimed with your pure innocent smile and Luffy nodded at you.

However, your eyes soon darkened at Megedagik sight. You started walking slowly towards him, taking a step after step, without breaking eye contact with him, you started pulling out your huge scythe, dragging it by the floor.

"Hey franky!! Isn't that the scythe in your weapon development room? I thought it was yours!!" Exclaimed Usopp in surprise

"No its not mine! I know it belongs to Y/N, but never knew she can use it!!" Answered Franky

"D-Do You remember this scar?!!! You caused it to me 8 years ago, and now I'm gonna make sure to leave one on you, it will let you remember its pain until you DIE!!!" Yelled Megedagik as his men started showing up infront of you.

" A scar from eight years ago.... She knows this jerk?" Said Zoro

" Well...I'm curious to know how things ended up with her like that"Chuckled Robin weakly

You swiftly waved your scythe, like it weighs nothing. Within one slash, Megedagik's men were bleeding down on the ground, and this is where he started shivering, your gaze was full of grudge and hatred, it was enough to send him chills. Few other men showed up attacking you out of sudden, but you already took care of them in minutes, eyes still focused on Megedagik.

"G... Gorgeous...." Is the only thing Sanji was able to say, as he stared at you in shock

Well lets say, each of the Strawhats jaws dropped at their innocent yet cute nakama, who was normally holding a scythe that was double her size like it was nothing. They never expected you to be so felixble whilst fighting, let alone your strength that you haven't unleashed the half of it yet.

Once you were done with his men, you stood there, looking at your Nakamas with an assuring look, then your gaze came back to Megedagik. Suddenly the aura around you started changing, you were turning into your demonic appearance.

"Haaaaahahaaaa, are you finally unleashing your true appearance!!! Never knew that you're so eager to get kicked out from your crew too" he mocked, knowing that you were expelled from your village because of your demonic appearance.

"W-Whats happening to Y/N, there is a dark aura around here!!" Exclaimed Chopper in worry

"T-true appearance? What does that jerk mean?" Questioned Sanji himself

Soon, your skin got paler, your iris turned sharp, and their colors changed, your hair grew two times longer than it was floating in the air, then your clothes got ripped revealing the sakura petals tattoo that were engraved all over your limbs. Your scythe's blade slowly turned into black, you simply wrapped it in armament haki.

"Yohohohoho, Y/N-san can use armament haki!! UNEXPECTED" Said Brook in absolute shock and everyone else were stunned

And without an alert, you attacked Megedagik mercilessly, he was able to stop some of them, when a malicious idea popped in his head,on the other hand, you started running towards him to attack him once again, when he took out his gun, aimed it towards Sanji and shot him twice. Of course, your attention immediately shifted to Sanji once you heard his groans of pain. You would say that his observation haki is the strongest out of all, and he probably saw that coming, but he's cuffed and tied in ropes, he couldn't move an inch to do anything about it.

"SANJI!!!" You called in fear seeing the two bullets piercing through his body

However, Megedagik took your distraction as an opportunity to turn the tables. He soon brought out a huge shot gun, and aiming it straight to your legs, his plan is to shoot you in a place that would prevent you from moving, so he can enjoy torturing you little by little until you fall dead.

"You have no idea how I suffered because of you, now I'll take my revenge for the scar that you left on my face" murmured Megedagik reasy to fire

"Y/N!! Y/N-CHAN!! OI Y/N!!! LOOK OUT!!!!" Screamed the monster trio in sync once they noticed Megedagik's move

💥SHOT💥

Megedagik Shot your left thigh with no hesitation, and due to how powerful the shot was, your leg got separated from your thigh leaving it torned apart the as blood flows down from it. You gritted on your teeth as you fell on the ground in a severe pain, then you let out a loud whimper. Thr Monster Trio raged in anger, while the rest had expressions mixed of shock and worry, but you surprised them all when you hysterically started laughing, you back off a little, trying to fix your posture.

"Y/N-CHAN!!! THAT BASTARD !!!!!I'M GONNA KILL YOU" yelled Sanji in anger, as he tried to free himself

You motioned to Sanji that you're fine with your angelic smile, you dragged yourself to your thrown scythe, braced yourself with it as you stood up on your right leg.

"Y-you think, you can kill me by torning my limbs apart? Wrong...I'm gonna show you whom you're dealing with!" You exclaimed

With that, out of no where, your left leg grew again in the speed of light, as if it wasn't torned apart few seconds ago. Megedagik back off, no believing what he just witnessed, nobody actually did.

"Before you decide to fight anyone, make sure to make some research about them, especially demons like me" you smirked

Before Megedagik could react, you were already infront of him with your huge scythe ripping his chest apart, leaving him down there barely able to move. You knelt down to him and whispered

"If you still have the audacity and bravery to make a little chit chat with me, then I bet you do it without using cheap tricks like a coward, but if you're not, then you better not show me your face again, if I found out by any chance that you're hurting innocent people anywhere around this world, then it won't end just by torning your chest apart, do you understand ?" You told him and he nodded in fear, tears streaming over his face

You took the cuffs' keys and pulled out a dagger from your right thigh hip pouch, with your scythe, you approached your Nakamas, working on freeing them from all of that mess. You gently helped Sanji alongside Chopper to put him down, because he pretending to be okay after getting shot, but it was clearly visible that he's struggling against showing that he's in pain.

"Sanji, You're gonna be okay....right?...I'm so sorry that's all because of me-" you cried holding his hands in worry

"Shhh...I-its..okay Y/N-chan...I'm fine...this is nothing, and ...its not your fault so don't cry" Assured you Sanji as he wiped the tears off your face

Once you all made it back successfully to Sunny Go, everyone were silent all the way back, nobody said anything, are they perhaps scared of you? Well you can't blame them after they witnessed all the crazy things happened earlier with you.

Chopper took Sanji to the sick bay to treat his injuries and asked everyone else to wait for their turns, since their injuries were minor compared to the ones Sanji got. You sat down there on the Mass bench, waiting in worry for Sanji to get treated, this is when Luffy approached you with serious facial expressions.

The awkward silence couldn't get worse, and your captain is approaching you with serious expressions. Well, you can say that you're kinda expecting what is he going to say to you, and you're somehow prepared for it. It would only be selfish of you to stay here when they don't want you, just like everyone else in the village did when you exposed your true appearance, I mean it can be worst than him apologizing and asking you to leave the ship respectfully. It might hurt for few weeks, maybe months, but eventually you'll get over it.

These thoughts kept spinning inside your head as you watched Luffy getting closer and closer while you tried to calm down your nervous heart, this is hard after all.

"Y/N" called Luffy in a calm tone

"Y-Yes Luffy?" You simply replied

"HOW DID YOU MAKE YOUR LEG GROW OUT AGAIN LIKE THAT!!!! THAT'S AWESOMEEEEEE!!!!!" He excitedly exclaimed with his star-shaped eyes

"I'm not gonna lie, but girl you're a badass, I'm still amazed how you swiftly swayed that scythe" complimented Zoro

"They probably should add the 'Cute Demon' nickname to your wanted poster" chuckled Robin at the suggestion she gave

"Y/N !! You were a SUUUPER Cute Nakama, but turned out that you're also a SUUUUPER Wild demon!!!!" Said Franky doing his iconic super pose

You're jaw dropped at the sudden change in their attitude, they don't hate you? Are they really okay with what you are? You couldn't tell, but the tears started sliding over your cheeks at their unexpected kind words.

"W-Woah!! Y/N !! Why are you crying???!!" Questioned Usopp in worry

"Are you hurt anywhere?!!" Added Nami

"Y/N-CHWAAANNN~!! I'm got my treatment, so you don't have to worry because I'm -" Exclaimed Sanji happily as he came down the stairs while Chopper ran behind him in worry

That's when he saw you crying, He quickly approached and took you in his arms giving you an embrace not really knowing the reason for why you're crying.

"What's wrong Y/N-chan?why are you crying? Hmm?" He asked softly caressing your hair

"I thought you guys would ask me to leave the crew..." You softly sobbed

"L-Leave?? Why would we ask you to leave Y/N?!!! YOU ARE MY NAKAMA, THERE IS NO WAY I WOULD KICK YOU OUT" Assured you Luffy

"B-but.... I thought that you guys hated my appearance because it I look like a hideous Monster, and probably got disgusted by the way my leg grew back earlier, and I-" you tried to explain but stopped when Sanji pressed his lips against yours

!! LOUD GASPS !!

"S-Sanji..?" You called, cheeks turning red

"We don't know what happened to you in the past that forced you to say these harsh words about yourself, but Y/N-chan, by the way you unleashed your powers today, I can assure you that you made me fall for you even more than I already was" he said with a warm tone as he cupped your cheeks

"I'm still surprised that you're calling yourself like that when there isn't literally any normal person on this ship" Shrugged Zoro

"You Mosshead-!" Sanji said glaring at him when Nami smacked Zoro in his head

"pfft..." You chuckled and everyone got surprised

"Y/N-chan....." Called Sanji as the smile appeared on his face just like the rest

"But guys can I ask you something?" You said to the them

"Yeah, what's the matter Y/N?" Questioned Nami

"Well... Don't get me wrong but ...How did that jerk took you hostage? I mean, I'm sure that you'd have took care off him immediately once you felt his presence on Sunny " you questioned confused

"Sleeping Gas" said Robin simply

"Yeah, he used a cheap trick like that to take us" Said Sanji as he sighed

"I see..." You replied

"But Y/N-San, You seem to know Megedagik" Said Brook

"Oh well yeah...A long story from 8 years ago...." You said putting some hairlines back on your ears

You continued telling them how you met Megedagik, and what happened on your island, how the villagers were the reason for why felt insecure and unsure about your demonic powers, but Sanji was right there beside you, taking your hand in his, and squeezing it for reassurance.

Later on that night when dinner was over, you were all still seated on the dinning table, but everyone were carefully listening to you, they were curious about what can you do with your demonic powers, and you gladly told them everything, getting unforgettable reactions.

Once everyone went inside their quarters for sleep, you stood by Sunny's wooden barrier, inhaling the the ocean scent, feeling your shoulders light weighted, then a pair of arms wrapped around your tiny figure from behind, It was no one other Sanji.

"S-Sanji what are you doing here, you're injured, you need to rest" You said looking back at him

"I've wanted to hold you like this for a long time, please let us stay like this for a while" he simply said closing his eyes and burying his face in your neck

"I don't deserve such a kind heart like yours Sanji.." you said with a sad smile, caressing Sanji's arms, still feeling a bit guilty from everything that happened

"Y/N....Don't you ever say this again, or else I'll get sad" he said dropping the horrific for once as he loosen his hold and turning you to him

"Love yourself, and awalys be yourself, don't you ever listen to anyone who criticize your well being and the way you look, you're just perfect the way you are, Demon or not, I love you because you're yourself, because you're Y/N-chan" he added

"Sanji...." You called him tears forming again in your eyes

"Don't cry my darling...I'll kick whoever offends and hurts your feelings" he said leaning and stealing a kiss from your lips

Then your foreheads touched, eyes both immersed in each other, he cupped your cheeks, titled his head and closed the gap for another passionate yet deep kiss.

You two were told in the next morning that you two were found asleep in each other's arms down in the aquarium.

The End

#one piece #one piece strawhats #one piece x reader #one piece scenarios #one piece imagine #sanji #sanji x reader #sanji imagine #sanji scenario #one piece one shot #one piece sanji #sanji op

119 notes · View notes

socialwriter · 4 years

Text

Make no mistake, she’s mine

**Not my gif, credit to owner**

Based on this song

Pairing: JJ Maybank x Female reader, Ex!Rafe Cameron x Female Reader

Summary: You may be with JJ now, but that doesn’t mean that Rafe can’t confront him and give him a piece of his mind

TW: Mentions of drinking, mentions of drugs, like a half curse word maybe

1.4k+ words

A/n: I’ve been wanting to write this song fic ever since I heard it Omg. Bolded words are song lyrics and Italicized words are flashbacks. Also, did I link the glee version instead of the Streisand or Kenny Rogers version? Maybe.

A/n pt 2: okok so I got over excited and posted this at a time when ppl aren’t on and now I’m worried no one see this so I’m tagging some mutuals. Oops. :@blueeyedbesson @softstarkey @girlsru1eboysdroo1 @adoreyoudrews @tomfreakinghollandneedsaoscar @queenk00k @shawnssongs @summerintheobx @sortagaysortahigh @lefthandwritings @heliopvth @summerintheobx

Despite his party going ways, Rafe had grown to hate going to keggers at the boneyard. Sure, there was a bunch of cheap, free beers that he and his friends could snag to get wasted on, tourons to sleep with, and pogues to make fun of. But Rafe knew that at every kegger you would be there, dancing with him. At first when Topper had told him th.at you had moved on and were currently in a relationship with JJ Maybank, he thought that Top was pulling a fast one on him. Sure, he had eventually expected you to get a new guy eventually, he just hadn’t expected it to be the person that he hated the most on the entire island.

Through grumbled protests on Rafe’s behalf, Topper and Kelce had dragged him out of the house to what was supposed to be the biggest party on the boneyard in months, since it was the Friday of Spring Break. The boys arrived an hour late, Rafe dragging his feet the entire way. He stayed in the area that was mainly populated by kooks, asking Kelce to get him his drink for him so that he wouldn’t have to accidentally bump into you, or worse, JJ. Rafe stared at the ground,not wanting to catch sight of you, which would inevitably send him into a downward spiral.

Kelce eventually came back, a funny look on his face which made both Topper and Rafe furrow their eyebrows in confusion. “Dude, what's up with you?” Topper questioned Kelce, which elicited a ‘shut it’ look from the kook. That look, however, told Rafe all that he needed to know.

“It’s about Y/n, isn’t it?”

Kelce frowned, knowing that his best friend had caught on. “Yeah, her and JJ...just don’t go where people are dancing anytime soon, okay dude?” But it was too late. Rafe had already glanced in that direction, your arms around his neck, his hands on your waist, and a look of pure adoration on your face. You used to look at him with that glint in your eyes, but throughout your relationship it seemed to have faded. Eventually, you walk away from JJ, needing another drink, your gaze lingering on his as long as possible before heading off to the keg.

Rafe doesn’t even know what he’s really doing, his feet just carry him over to JJ. He doesn’t even hear Topper and Kelce’s protests behind him of ‘its not worth it’ ‘leave it alone’, and ‘let’s just have a good time tonight’.

As soon as Rafe reaches JJ, both boys puff out their chests, a habit both boys had developed after countless fights riddled with testosterone. “Listen Maybank, I don’t know what you think you’re doing with my girl, but you better stop.” Rafe growls lowly, speaking so that only JJ could hear despite the crowd of people forming around the two of them.

JJ scoffs before glaring at Rafe, venom in his voice, “She’s not yours anymore, Rafe.” JJ muttered, shoving Rafe when he said his name. “You weren’t good for her, so you better forget about whatever you two had and leave. Oh, and don’t call her up anymore.”

Your phone buzzed against the wooden night stand, pulling you away from tracing shapes on JJ’s bare chest. You reach over him, looking at the caller id, rolling your eyes and wanting to chuck your phone across the room. JJ senses your shift in mood, moving so he’s sitting up slightly and looking at you. “Who is it?” JJ questions, trying to grab for your phone which you hold away from him. You don’t want to tell him who it is, because you know he’ll get worked up as soon as he finds out. “Rafe” you mumble, half hoping he doesn’t hear the name. When you timidly look up at JJ, he’s practically fuming, moving to get up and no doubt head down to Figure 8 and give Rafe a piece of his mind.

Before he gets much further, you place your hand on his shoulder, and he eases almost instantly under your touch. “Remember what you told me whenever I would come to you crying and broken over that dickwad?” You question, placing a soft his on his neck.

He sighs, realizing where you’re going with it. “Rafe Cameron is not worth a second of your time sweetheart.” You smile against his skin, nodding. “So listen to your own advice J, and come back to bed and cuddle with me.”

Rafe rolls his eyes at the Pogue, stepping closer so that the two were chest to chest. “You may be in her bed, pogue, but I don't want to see your face answer her door. Make no mistake she's mine.”

JJ was fuming at this point. How dare Rafe say that you were his? You were JJ’s girl. No shouts from John B, Pope, or Kie would be able to dissuade him at this point. “She’s mine. I only know what she's like when she needs me.Oh how she needs me deep in the night.”

JJ is awoken by your tossing and turning, a slew of murmurs resembling words leaving you lips. He can’t stand to see the pained expression on your face, so he gently shakes you awake. “W-what?” You mumble, rubbing your eyes. “What happened?”

“You were having a nightmare angel.”

“Oh.”

JJ frowns, placing a strand of hair behind your ear that had gotten tousled with all your tossing and turning. “What was it about.”

You shift uncomfortably, having a clear memory of the nightmare but feeling embarrassed to tell JJ. “I, um-” you look down, suddenly finding a stray thread in the blanket very interesting to play with. JJ places his hands over yours, causing you to stop playing with the thread and look up at him. “You know how you make me tell you about whats on my mind even if I don’t always want to?” You nod in response to his question. “Well I’m gonna hold you up to that same standard right now doll.”

You sigh, knowing that JJ just wanted you to be able to talk to him and lean on him in the way he’d leaned on you many times before. “It was a memory of Rafe on one of his highs. He saw me talking to Topper, and he went mad. He beat up Topper and he just wouldn’t let up. It was terrifying I-I thought..” You choke up, tears falling from your eyes. JJ pulls you into his chest, whispering sweet nothings to you while stroking your hair all in an effort to calm you. From that night onwards, he vowed to try and pick up the pieces that Rafe Cameron had left behind.

Rafe is taken aback by the blond in front of him telling him off instead of going to jab at him. Rafe supposed it would have been easier to get into a physical fight with JJ, because then his thoughts about you could be held close to his heart, unchallenged by the pogue. JJ’s words were hurting Rafe anymore than a physical blow ever could. Before Rafe could respond, your shouts could be heard. As soon as Sarah had told you that Rafe and JJ were in the middle of a crowd of people, looking ready to fight, you rushed over, elbowing your way through the crowd until you had reached your boyfriend, grabbing his hand to pull him out of his daze. “J, babe, look at me,” you say firmly, squeezing his hand so that he’ll look at you. When he finally glances your way, his gaze softens, and you can see some of his tensed muscles relax. “He’s not worth it.” You shake your head, glancing over at Rafe with only distaste in your gaze. You could no longer recall the fondness or love that you once had for the kook, your only memories left were ones of pain and heartache. It had been a toxic relationship for you, and you were lucky that you had left and fell in love with JJ.

You pull JJ away from Rafe, backing up step by step before Rafe’s voice fills your ears. “JJ, she’s a lot to lose so just..Don't get too close when you dance. Cause I don't want to hear from my friends you were out ... with her in your arms.”

JJ nodded, and a silent understanding seemed to pass between the two men. You were a lot to lose, and JJ would be damned if he was going to do anything to let you go.

1K notes · View notes

unlocktxt · 4 years

Text

Only at Night | c.sb

choi soobin x reader

genre: fluff

word count: 1.7k

description: you and soobin live two separate lives, and need an escape. a silent agreement to live separate lives as soon as the sun rises.

warnings: none

note: something somewhat short, but sweet!

the clock never seems to stop ticking. the constant rhythm of each second from the clock was ringing through your head. it was never ending.

“just ignore it,” you mumble as your leg starts to bounce from underneath the table.

it was aggravating. you couldn’t focus and it was such a simple essay. you don’t get these easy topics anymore. at this point, you were convinced the question was mocking you.

where do you see yourself in the future?

this question had haunted you ever since highschool. through elementary and junior high... it was all fun and games. things weren’t so fun anymore. there was a constant pressure that you couldn’t ignore anymore. with your good grades, your parents expected that you’d be great as a doctor, but you knew it wasn’t all about the grades.

truth is... you are lost. you spent so long pretending to be someone else, trying to portray your family's ideals... that you lost track of what you enjoyed. so now... now you were stuck. you could only watch in envy as your classmates went on and on about their dream jobs... that were pretty realistic goals. some had known what they’ve wanted to be for their whole life, so why couldn’t you just decide?

without realizing it your shaking legs had become intense, the only thing snapping you out of your mind was the sound of the pencil breaking. your body relaxed after seeing how tense you were. with a deep sigh, you figured the only way to get this off of your chest was to go outside.

pushing yourself away from the desk you grabbed your jacket before rushing out of your room.

straight to the front door. no stopping.

you ignored your parents' attempts to ask where you were going. it didn’t matter anyway... you didn’t have an answer to give. as soon as the door closed you made a run for it. although the reason for this was because you wanted to go to your secret spot in peace, the thrill of running away and defying your parents was thrilling. you couldn’t help but think that this was what it’s like to live.

you heard so many stories about how your parents were basically delinquents. always partying, racing in the night, wrecking things, you name it. yet... because of this, it seems they never let you do anything thrilling. you understood how dangerous it could be and they didn’t want you to learn the lessons that they could just warn you about. as much as you tried to understand their reasoning... it just hurt even more. the point in life is to learn from your own mistakes.

pushing your thoughts away, you had let the wind overwhelm your senses. the chilling air felt amazing with the night sky above you. a smile crept up on your face as your shouting parents could no longer be heard. adrenaline was pumping through your veins and it felt so...exhilarating.

honestly, maybe you should run away from all your problems, it does a load of help. by the time you reached the hill behind a few closed buildings, you were out of breath. the adrenaline had probably worn off because you weren’t feeling as invincible.

your heavy breathing as you headed up the hill didn’t go unnoticed by the boy sitting at the top. he barely had to turn his head to figure that you weren’t a threat.

unlike the boy, you were pretty startled to see him laying there. you’ve never run into him before, so why now? then again you usually didn’t visit this place at night.

hesitated before turning around with your shoulders slouched. ‘i guess i could just go to the park.’

“you don’t have to leave, i was gonna head off soon anyways.” you heard his body shuffle against the grass, indicating his leave. you felt bad for making him leave early.

“no, it’s okay. you can stay... i shouldn’t be out anyway.” you turned to look at the boy just to make sure he wasn’t about to stab you or something along those lines.

when you met his eyes you swore your heart stopped. handsome was an understatement. he chuckled as he pulled his hood over his head and waved goodbye.

“w-wait!” you don’t know what enticed your body to stop him, but you didn’t mind it because it got him to stop walking.

he didn’t respond, allowing his stillness to answer for him. you could practically hear him say “what?”

“i don’t see why we both can’t just sit there. no need for either of us to leave right?” it was still silent causing your face to heat up from the embarrassment. “only if you want to of course.” you shouted... a little too loudly.

he finally turned around to look at you with his hands in his pockets.

“okay... sounds good to me.” he walked back up to the top of the hill to meet you. when he got closer you got a better look at him. his dark hair was covered by his hood, but you could see his soft features. his height didn’t go unnoticed.

after the two of you sat down, you tried minding your own business. the stars in the sky looked amazing and they reminded you of just how small your problems were... even so, they didn’t hurt any less.

“can i ask you something?” you turned your head to look at him, only to realize he was staring at the stars.

“go ahead.” you encouraged before looking back at the bright stars, trying to pick out which one was your favorite.

“why are you out here?” his question brought the silence back.

you debated whether or not to tell him. it’s not like it’s something all that bad, but you didn’t really know him... perhaps that’s the exact reason you should tell him. a stranger can’t spread the news to everyone you know.

“well... i had to get away. i just needed someplace to think without all the expectations...” you looked at him to see if you should continue, from his silence you assumed so, “i feel like i can be myself when i’m alone away from the world i know... away from the people i know. it’s impossible to feel free in a house that feels like a prison, so i thought the best way to think freely was to escape from the things holding me hostage.”

“that’s reason enough...” he finally looked at you instead of the stars. it was as if he was telling you that he acknowledged you as a whole, which was all you needed recently.

“how about you huh?” this time it was your turn to ask the question. it was only fair that he told you his reasoning.

he chuckled once more before looking at the grass, “it looks like we came here for the same reason. it’s an escape. my life tends to be a little upbeat... there’s never really a time to rest. i keep trying to live my life to its fullest at the cost of my future. it’s about time that i get my life on track and the only way i can think about this is when i’m here.”

you watched as he pulled at the grass. what he said... was kind of the life you wished you were living. maybe you could learn from each other... find the balance in the middle.

“fair enough.” you smiled as he met your eyes. at this moment there was a mutual understanding... mutual trust in some random stranger you just met.

the moment shattered right in front of you as soon as you heard your ringtone. you didn’t have to check to know that your parents were calling you.

“you should probably answer that.” he saw your hesitation and figured that it was indeed your parents. you felt as though this perfect moment was slowly deflating... and you were determined to keep it from doing so.

throwing away your hesitation, you committed to ignoring your parents. for once you didn’t think about the consequences and turned off your phone.

“not at all. this is me time right?” you shrugged as you put your phone back, letting your racing heart settle.

“i guess so...” he was silent. stuck in his thoughts. “maybe we could make this a ‘we’ thing. make it our time.” he suggested.

‘a, we thing’ your heart picked up its pace at his words. you wanted to seem confident. you wanted to get to know him better.

“should i know your name before this becomes a we thing?” you asked while attempting to smirk at him. the smirk didn’t seem to work because he fell over in laughter.

“...is it obvious i don’t flirt much?” you ask as you try to laugh it off as well.

he sat back up after taking a deep breath to calm himself. when he looked back at you his eyes were shining in the moonlight while he wore such a beautiful and true smile. “so very obvious, although at least you have the courage.”

“the courage?” you questioned. you’ve never considered yourself to be someone with courage.

“well...” he dragged on, “you did just admit to trying to flirt with me.”

your cheeks flushed immediately. his sly smirk caused you to look away because unlike you, he could, in fact, pull a smirk off.

“it’s soobin. my name’s soobin.”

soobin eh? easygoing and good-natured. fitting. you were just glad he changed the subject.

“well soobin it’s nice to meet you.” you made sure not to look at him again. perhaps you were trying to tease him by playing hard to get... or you were just admiring the beautiful stars.

“what’s your name?” he asked as he tried to subtly scoot closer to you.

“wouldn’t you like to know?” you laughed, “i’ll tell you when this becomes our thing.”

soobin groaned as he fell onto his back to stare at the sky.

“so what exactly is our thing?” you laid beside him trying to pick out the brightest stars to choose from. the stars always seem to act as a distraction.

“two strangers relying on each other in the peaceful night. only during the night, so that we know there’s someone that knows us solely on the absence of everyday life.”

it sounded like a miracle, a fantasy if you will. he’d be the one person that could get to know the real you... the free you, the one without all the expectations.

“that sounds perfect.”

and that’s how it started. never sharing a second glance at each other as soon as the sun would rise. from then on the friendship that blossomed would soon turn into something more.

79 notes · View notes

ofmythsandmadness · 4 years

Text

pretty eyes.

you love diego hargreeves pretty eyes, sober and drunk off your rocker. only, when its the latter, it’s a little harder to hold back your eager compliments.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

WARNINGS & DETAILS: gender!neutral reader. mention of alcohol & drinking, some fighting later on in the chapter (it’ll make sense when it comes), idiots being idiots, mutual pining, a tad bit of angst. WORD COUNT: 6.5k NOTES: at the end (read please).

BUY ME A COFFEE HERE. | CHECK OUT MY OTHER WRITINGS HERE.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“DO YOU KNOW WHY THE SKY’S BLUE?”

Diego didn’t look back, but from the sounds of tiny pants and dull clunks of shoes hitting the ground, he knew enough to paint a picture. You, struggling to rid yourself of the coat he forced you to put on, dropping the heels you claimed you hated so vehemently, all the while probably grinning from ear to ear like he imagined little kids looked on Christmas Day. He knew you’d be waiting for his answer, just as you always did, expecting something greater than he could give you in his own flustered state.

Sometimes you were predictable. But he liked that about you.

“I don’t know. Why?”

“No, silly! I’m asking you!”

“Oh.” His tongue danced across his bottom lip, wetting the chapped skin before responding. “I dunno. Sorry.”

Only a sparkling laugh and a thump answered him. He whirled around to see you flat on your butt on the ground, staring up at him with drooping doe eyes. It would be an irresistibly pretty sight, if he knew it wasn’t from extreme inebriation and you were completely off your rocker at the moment.

Still, pretty.

“Help me up?” You laughed, waving your hands aimlessly towards him. “Puh-lease?”

Diego grimaced slightly but moved anyways. He grabbed at your hands (clammy, another symptom of your heavy drinking choices) and yanked you towards him. Only he overestimated you and greatly underestimated his own strength it seemed -- instead of lifting to your feet like any normal person, you practically flew towards him, landing just under his chin and flopping against his chest.

And Diego froze.

Normally he would have pulled away and shrugged it off as a mistake. Neither of you would mention it again and would move on with your lives, forgetting how close your bodies had been and the way your gaze was intoxicating upon itself. He had rules for those things; never getting too close to a friend who made his heart beat in a rather unfriendly way was one of them.

But as you looked up at him, still smiling dopily and eyes almost crossed, he couldn’t remember a single thing about rules or precautions or anything of the sort. All that was on Diego’s mind, was you.

Your smile softened a tad, painted lips closing over your teeth and only hinting at the dimples he had stared at many-a-time before. Up close, he could see flecks of black under your eyes, staining flushed skin with ebony freckles that no one could believe was natural. He didn’t know the word for it, but guessed it was from you rubbing at your eyes and forgetting you had painted them hours before. Despite it, you still looked absolutely radiant.

“You have really pretty eyes.”

Diego blinked, startled by your giggled statement. “W-what?”

“Sooo pretty,” you gushed. One of your hands left his chest -- he hadn’t even realised they had been pressed there, but he suddenly missed the warm sensation -- and caressed his cheek. He shuddered at the touch. “Maybe the pre...prettiest eyes I’ve ever seen!”

If merely standing near you was heart-attack inducing, Diego was certain that all this was going to explode the vessel. Any second at that point, it would just burst and coat your grinning face with its guts--

-- he shook his head, ridding himself of both that image and the foolish thoughts flooding around it. You were drunk. Everyone said and did stupid stuff when they were drunk. Right? Like the time he lost a fight with a lamp post -- he wouldn’t do that sober, but alcohol made everyone a fool. You just chose compliments over actions, maybe.

The saying ‘drunk words, sober thoughts’ lingered in his mind for half a second, but he pushed it away. That only worked in late night television or shitty rom-coms, not reality. Not with them.

“You should get to bed,” Diego said gruffly, pulling away from your fingers. He didn’t miss the flash of disappointment on your face, but tried to push it away for his own emotions’ sake. “You’re gonna want to, ‘fore all this hits.”

“You should smile more.”

Diego froze. He didn’t turn back to her that time, knowing it would only hurt him more, but he couldn’t bring himself to move another inch.

“Your eyes are fu...cking beautiful, but your smile?” Clapping echoed paces behind him; his jaw clenched with every smack. “Diego, you’re so pretty!”

He reached behind him blindly, scrambling and feeling stupid before finally launching onto you. Still avoiding your charming smile, he pulled you along, leading you out and into your bedroom. “I’ll be back to get you some Advil. Sit down.”

“I wish you’d smile more,” you said, completely ignoring every word he said. You fell down to your bed with a plop. “It lights up those pretty pretty, pretty eyes so much...so fucking pretty, Diego! I can’t even think of any other words, that’s how be-yew-tiful you are.”

“Okay, I--”

“-- and you always look so grumpy. It’s so funny!”

Diego should have been long gone, at that point. For his own sake and for yours, because you would hate that you rambled on so much, and he was going to pay for the emotional turmoil you were putting him through. But he couldn’t. He simply stood, still and awkward in your bedroom doorway, watching as you tried to twist your face to look like his own.

It didn’t work at all. Your lips fought angrily to smile again, and your eyelids just drooped, so far you looked stoned, or maybe like a zombie ready to bite. But even if you looked beyond ridiculous, his mind still screamed at how adorable it was, and despite himself, Diego smiled.

“See! See, there - there it is!” You pointed frantically at his own face, like he didn’t know it was there. “God, I wish I had a mirror to show you how pretty you are! Lil...lil sunshine boy!”

Okay, ‘sunshine boy’ was new. It took a little bit of the piss out of everything, and he was able to grumble and walk away finally from your singing self. Calls of his name paired with nonsensical titles followed. Diego tried his best to ignore them, but he knew the coos would haunt him later. Even as he searched for a glass, the sounds bounced through his head like injured bats in a cave; no way out and too blind to escape, forced to flit around endlessly until someone ended their suffering.

But Diego, unfortunately, did not know how to do that. So he simply bore the weight of your compliments knowing that they were nothing but sounds and syllables made up by a confused mind, trying to push through the night with as little baggage as possible.

As he walked back to your room, he sighed. This wasn’t how he planned things to go. It had been a good night -- sure, he might not have had as much fun as you looked like you were having, dancing and drinking and laughing, but at least he was with you. And he liked that, and the lax nature you took on when you drank, making him feel less pressure about constantly being the best version of himself. He hadn’t felt like he needed to put on a show, he was just Diego, for better or for worse. And somehow, you didn’t mind that.

He only wished that he could have more than that and all the time.

“Okay,” he said, clearing his throat after the word came out garbled. “Uh - got you this, you’re gonna want to drink it and take these now. Okay? And I’m putting these here for tomorrow morning, so you can take that as soon as you’re up. You got that?”

Your head bobbed up and down excitedly, but he knew you didn’t take in a word he said. So as you swallowed the tablets and gulped down the water, he scribbled out a note to remind you of what definitely went right over your head.

Diego paused, pen slightly trembling in his hand, before jotting down two more sentences. Thanks for last night. Had a good time being with you, as always. He hesitated, hovering over the slip of paper before cursing and scribbling out the lines with added violence. He tried again, being a little bit more poetic (which wasn’t much, but words really were not his thing) only to be disappointed again, pushing down on the pen so hard he was sure it would burst. Once he was sure nothing but scribbles could be made of the mess, he put the note under the Advil bottle and stepped away.

“You wanna change out of that?” He asked, gesturing to your clothes. “Doubt that’s comfortable.”

“Nah,” you drawled. You smiled up at him and even dared to wink (it was more of a sloppy, half-assed blink, but it still made his head swim). “I’m just comfortable. Do...you…’re you comfortable?”

Diego chose not to answer that. He pushed you back gently, deciding not to fight with you on changing and instead just going with sleep. You didn’t fight him much. If anything you leaned into it, holding onto his hands for seconds longer than you should and mumbling sweet nonsense up at him.

“You know,” you sang, “you know what, Di...Diego?”

He didn’t pause. “What?”

“I would do anything...and everything...in order to make you smile forever. You know? Anything.”

Those were the words that weighed heaviest on Diego’s conscience as he drove back to his place. It was as though they had erased everything else, anything that had happened that day or any time before and just left that in its place. He didn’t know why, but they stuck, and as he wove through the dimly lit streets, your voice floated about like a bodiless apparition, set to destroy his mind and drive him mad.

Diego had had his heart broken several times before. It happened almost easily in his childhood, normally by the hands of his vindictive father. He had learned how to patch it up, sew up the cracks and try to make it so it wouldn’t happen again, and eventually he got better at that. But it shattered again when Ben died, and he realised that they were just kids, forced to play heroes in a horrifically gruesome world they didn’t belong in. That took a while to mend, but he did, until he screwed up at the police academy and Patch left him too. After that he had let the fragments just sit in piles in his chest, digging at his ribs and leaving him winded after long nights in the cold darkness. He hadn’t cared; he thought that was what was expected of him. Nothing but a broken heart to hold him when the nightmares got too bad.

But when you came along, he didn’t have to stitch himself back together. You did it for him. Somehow without him noticing you had snuck into his chest and unravelled the poor stitchwork and blotted out the stains left that he hadn’t bothered to clean up. Over time, you had managed to make it almost brand new again, and it was a whole new experience of smiling and watching as you failed to finish your joke again, only because you were already laughing too hard. Of getting wasted on Wednesday’s when your job sucked more and dancing down the streets up to your apartment, uncaring of those who watched. Of you chiding him for the cuts and bruises collected from his vigilante expeditions, but always being there to wash them out and make a fresh pot of tea. Of you, merely existing, and allowing him to bask in your sunshine a while longer.

But hearing those soft words leave your drunken lips, spilling out like tar from someone so angelic, hurt. Diego didn’t think that was possible with you.

He sighed, turning down the street towards the gym. It would be a sleepless night again.

YOU WOKE UP THE NEXT MORNING CONFUSED AND ACHING.

Not as much as you normally would be, which was a nice change of pace -- you assumed you had enough common sense to take premature headache meds, knowing how bad the hangover got for them. But your drunken self did not have the thought of changing out of your stiff, uncomfortable going-out clothes, instead draping yourself across the mattress smelling like the shitty bar you had careened in and leaving every part of your body pissed off. Sweaty fabric clung to your skin, leaving you feeling soggy and misworn and eagerly wishing you could have made better choices earlier.

You groaned and slipped out of the comforter, already missing its heavy warmth. Slowly you staggered over to your desk where you must have left the Advil for that morning. “Thank you, past me,” you sighed, twisting open the cap with a grimace.

A paper caught your eye, small amongst the stacks of work files you had yet to comb through. Downing one pill, you grabbed it, taking in the scribbled letters through tired, squinting eyes.

Leaving this for you because you’re too drunk to remember what I said. Take these and drink water before you die of a hangover. I’d hate to find your body that way. Also left your things on your kitchen counter, they’re not stolen. Also left your burrito in your microwave -- you insisted on buying one last night, so don’t forget about it. Take care.

Underneath were two lines of thick black scribbles, covering up whatever was written under that and leaving only a scrawled ‘Diego’ as your final clue. But, despite whatever mystery the pen covered up, you smiled and pinned the note to your bulletin board.

“Thanks, bud,” you grinned, speaking like he was there to hear. “Hope I wasn’t too annoying last night.”

You went about your morning with a smile despite the pounding pulverising your muscles, and enjoying the lazy Sunday hours spent cleaning up. You even spoiled yourself with a long shower, eating up your hot water minutes with joy, knowing you’d hate yourself for it two weeks later. After an hour of cleaning up, washing your face free of the makeup smudged across your cheeks and devouring that burrito left for you, you finally felt refreshed and better about things.

You glanced up at the time. Diego would be up, probably manning the desk for Al as he did most Sunday’s (the facet of his job he hated most). But, at least that meant he would be available to take your call. You missed him, even after seeing him just the night before, and selfishly craved the distraction of his low rasp. Maybe you could even make him laugh, cheer him up during his boring shift.

But five minutes later, you were left disappointed when none of the three calls went through. You tried not to think too hard on it -- he was a busy guy, and was either working or doing his other line of work, and ignoring your call meant nothing. Course, it probably didn’t look good for a boxing gym, but...you’d settle.

You would just call back later. He would definitely be available to talk then.

IT HAD BEEN A WEEK SINCE YOU LAST TALKED TO DIEGO, which was the longest either of you had gone without even speaking to one another in the history of your friendship.

On its own, the fact wasn’t so troubling. You were both working adults who had their own lives to sort through, jobs and bills and other friends that you didn’t like half as much as each other, grocery shopping and patrolling the streets alike, filling up both schedules easily. But the two of you were closer than that, and definitely more than just friends that saw each other every other week. You didn’t care about those friends like you cared about Diego.

And it hurt, that he was going to such lengths to avoid you.

Every time you stopped by his gym, Diego was gone. Al simply shrugged off your questions with a non-committal ‘I don’t keep track of the shithead’ and even when you went to knock on his door to check if he was lying, you got nothing. No regulars knew either, which was strange; he always liked to spend his afternoons training with a couple people, sometimes you if you showed up at the right time. You considered doing just that and waiting for him to show -- but even after hours of sparring, the man was nowhere to be seen.

You had tried everything, to the point where Al was annoyed and you felt like you were losing your mind. Surely Diego hadn’t just disappeared off the face of the earth. That didn’t seem right or possible and you knew you hadn’t made him up, because you had the pictures and notes to prove it. You could see his face, disgruntled and sometimes smiling in the photos you had snapped of him -- so why couldn’t you find it anywhere else?

With all options exhausted, you gave up for a few days, allowing yourself the chance to catch your breath. However, with that came the exhaustive process of trying to figure out why on earth Diego was avoiding you. And unfortunately, all that linked back to your last night spent together, and the bitter realisation that you must have fucked up the night somehow and left him not wanting to see you again.

And that thought broke you.

Thursday night was spent crying alone on your couch, trying to push past the depressing thoughts and failing miserably. You couldn’t remember half of what you did that night, but you knew he hadn’t been drinking as much as you, and alcohol always rendered you a ranting, rambling fool that he must have had to deal with. He had got you home, but for what? And what if it was all in that stupid note he had left you, scribbling out the real reason he was leaving you high and dry?

You threw the note out that night, staring down at it in the trash with tears pooling in your eyes. If only you could know why.

The issue was, Diego was more than just a friend to you. Sure your relationship had been built on totally platonic foundations, but it soon blossomed into so much more. He was a companion, your partner, the man who made you feel comfortable enough to wheeze into laughter-induced tears with, or just sob against his shoulder without feeling judged. He was the guy who brought you fast food when you forgot about dinner when work ran late, and the one who let you sleep over when you didn’t want to be alone. He made you smile by just being there -- like, you would open your door (or window, usually) and just grin like an idiot at the mere sight of his face. He was just Diego, but that meant more to you than you had ever been able to say.

Maybe, hell, you loved him. Was that so bad? It hadn’t been intentional to fall -- one day you had just been eating pizza on your countertop way too late in the night, and you looked over and realised your heart had only ever fluttered so violently for him. That he was the guy you could imagine spending the rest of your days with and never getting bored. Of course, you didn’t act on it, knowing that it was a platonic relationship and admitting such would destroy it completely -- but that didn’t mean your official break-up didn’t hurt any less.

You skipped work Friday, something you never did.

When your coworkers called, you wrote it off as illness related, while still drowning in the sorrow of being left high and dry.

Friends hit you up to make some ‘end of the week’ plans, but you ignored them.

You fell asleep at nine that night -- the earliest you had in aeons.

You stayed in bed for most of Saturday, staring at the ceiling or the photos pinned to your walls of the two of you, wondering if this was all just a weird dream you were going to wake up from.

Six hours later, you hadn’t woken up from your dream, but you had made up your mind.

One hour after that, at almost ten o’clock at night, you were rolling up to that same boxing gym you had haunted for that week, dressed in dark activewear and parked a ways away from the actual space. Steely-eyed and with your jaw clenched, you marched out the vehicle and into the building, knowing full well what you were going to find. You had a plan, and whatever it took, you were going to put it into motion.

Maybe it wasn’t the greatest plan, and maybe you had only just come up with it, with barely any time to consider it’s workability and whether or not you were just throwing words together, but nevertheless, you persisted.

You were going to get Diego back.

“DIEGO FUCKING HARGREEVES,”

The man, back turned away, stiffened and immediately went to move,

“run and I will end you, boy,” you growled, stomping towards him with force; he could practically feel each stomp echoing in his chest, cracking him down to the size of a pea. Somehow, he couldn’t move, frozen in place by your command. “Okay?!”

“H-hey, I--”

“--why the hell have you been avoiding me?!”

His eyes were wide and panicked and frantically, he searched all around for a way out. Unfortunately, your body in front of him blocked his only exit, leaving him stammering for answers you knew he didn’t easily have. “Look, I--”

“--I have been worried and scared and sad and out of my mind this entire week,” you snapped, jabbing a finger into his tank top, pushing him back in his steps. Your anger dug deep into him, thorns grabbing onto every bit of vulnerable flesh -- and the worst part was, you were absolutely right. “You know that? I have called everywhere I could -- I even called the police, wondering if you were in custody and I just missed that news drop. But no, you were just gone, avoiding me for who knows what reason!”

“I didn’t--”

“--what did I do, Diego? What happened, what did I do wrong?”

“Nothing! You’ve done nothing.”

“Then why won’t you even look me in the eyes?” you hissed back, staring up at him in hopes he would catch your gaze. But he didn’t; his eyes still looked far away from yours, searching for something to give him a way out with. “You won’t even look at me, that’s how pissed off you are at me.”

“That’s not true.”

“I get if I did something wrong, but you can’t just pull away from me like that -- this friendship isn’t built on shit like that. I can’t cope with this void left by you deciding you don’t like me anymore!”

“That’s not what happened,” he insisted, his own voice raising in volume. “I swear!”

“Then what, Diego? What possible reason could you have that isn’t related to me doing something wrong? Because that’s all the evidence I got out of this and unlike you, I have zero detective skills so I’m working on one freakin’ theory here!”

His eyes averted to the ground, staring down at the both of your feet, one pair tapping angrily and the other shuffling in hopes of escape. He felt himself folding in, a habit he had broken a long time ago with you, one he thought he had killed off forever. But apparently it hadn’t.

“You can’t even answer me,” you shuddered. Your sneakers squeaked against the shiny linoleum, leading you back a step. “You - I don’t understand this. At all. And you can’t even give me an answer why? D-don’t I deserve a reason for why I hurt you, Diego?”

“No, c’mon. I…” he hesitated once more as expected. Whatever he was planning on saying died in his mouth and thickened his tongue, leaving him once again stumbling for an excuse. He felt your eyes on him as well as his father, reproachfully clicking his tongue at once again, his stuttering, bumbling fool of a son. “I did...I didn’t…”

“Forget it. Screw this.”

“W-wait, don’t leave--”

“--I’m not leaving!”

He froze, holding onto your bicep in an attempt to stop you. Slowly, his hand fell away, “w-what?”

“I’m not leaving,” you repeated, and slowly he watched as a devilish smile stained your cheeks, pulling away the angry lines of before. “I didn’t come here to leave, I came here for answers. And I guess I just have to fight you for ‘em.”

At that point, Diego’s head had been through the wringer so much, he felt like it could just pop off if he wasn’t careful. And yet still, his eyes bugged out and he stared at you in complete shock, unsure just how he was supposed to process that last sentence.

“I’m sorry, what?!”

You shrugged like it was nothing at all, “c’mon. I know you’re better with the physical stuff and I wanna catch you off guard, finally get an answer out of you. I’m gonna, like, fight you for the truth.”

He watched as you toed off your shoes and shrugged off your thin jacket, letting it fall to the floor behind you with little care. You seemed ready, like you had planned this all along -- and had you? What was the reason behind all this? Was there something that he just wasn’t getting, in his state of emotional disarray? Or were you just losing your mind because of him?

“L-look, I’m s-sorry, but I,” he paused, trying to form the syllables in his mouth so they weren’t so thick and jumbled. “I can’t just fight you.”

“Sure you can. We spar all the time.”

“But w-w-why?”

Once more, your shoulders lifted and fell; ever the nonchalant dramatic. “Call it a bet. I win, you tell me why you avoided me for so long. And if you win, which you probably won’t but if you do…” you grimaced. “I’ll leave and you never have to see me again.”

Diego baulked. “I don’t want that.”

“Clearly you do,” you jabbed back. “Right?”

“No. I don’t. I don’t want to lose you.”

You huffed; clearly you didn’t believe him, but you also seemed set on the idea that you were definitely going to win, so he wasn’t sure where he stood in that. “Fine, pick your prize and keep it to yourself. I don’t care.”

Diego still hesitated, hovering to the side as you wrapped your hands. There seemed no way out of the situation, but surely there had to be - surely you weren’t just going to hop into the ring for an explanation.

Was this some ill-fated revenge?

You must have noticed his expression, because he heard you laughing from a whiles away. “I’m not looking to hurt you, Diego. Trust me, no matter what you do, I’d never want to do that.”

His heart fluttered.

“It’s just,” you cocked your head, thinking over your words before smiling again, “like you said when you first started training me. Freestyle, baby.”

You had deepened your voice tremendously to mock his own -- and while it was a horrible impression, it did call back to the one you did before of him. Not that you seemed to remember that, you had been piss drunk, but the thought still made him cringe.

All this, because of him. He screwed it all up and for what?

“Rules are the same as always. First person to pin the other down for more than five beats wins. No serious hits, so like, don’t break my nose or anything.”

“I can’t do this,” he mumbled, even as he stepped into the ring. “We don’t need to do this. We can just talk.”

You sighed and looked back at him. There was a fierceness in your eyes, a determination for something he wasn’t quite sure of -- like there was a plan in motion, only he couldn’t figure out where the steps lead. “I didn’t come here to walk away, Diego. I’m here to win a bet and get my friend back, and also kick his ass if I have to because I’m desperate. You can’t convince me to leave, so wrap your hands and let’s get this going!”

“But-”

“-it’s either this or I just stare at you until you crack,” you said, no longer smiling. “And I doubt you want that typ’a torture, do you?”

He stared at you askance. “Really?”

You didn’t answer him with words that time.

The fight was fast, and almost evenly matched -- you had a slight advantage with your eye on your prize, and he was faltering with every other blow knowing he couldn’t bear to hurt you. But the pace picked up and soon it was like you were one fluid being, predators locked on and desperate to claw the other away from them while simultaneously, drawing them back in. Fists flew and every so often he saw the sparks fly from the fire in your eyes, catching on everything he turned from and leaving him surrounded by the flames you spilled.

For a moment, Diego thought he had it. He had managed to pivot away from your last onslaught and pulled you away from the centre, edging into the corner where he could finally pin you down. His arms outstretched and for a moment he was actually smiling because it felt like the good old days -- sparring way too late into the night when he should have been working with the girl he secretly loved and the stars watching from way above, admiring the gruesomely pretty sight.

But in a flash, everything switched.

He lunged, you slid.

When he fumbled, your legs wrapped around his own, pulling him back and flipping over one another like beetles rolling in the hot sun.

You were everywhere, smothering his smoke with your body, forcing him down before he even realised what was happening.

Diego blinked, and suddenly you were on top of him, legs on either side of his waist and your hands holding his own up above his head. Your expression edged on feral as you grinned down at him, straddling him and fighting everything he pushed back with.

But he couldn’t fight back. Not when you were on him and everywhere and he could smell your shampoo as your hand dangled around him, dripping your scent around him like he was in that poppy field from Wizard of Oz, ready to give into the toxin and be one with the flowers. Your hands held his own and he wished he could slide his fingers into the clasp, holding them to him and kiss each bruised knuckle with tenderness he didn’t know he possessed. Your hips, legs, chest pressed against his own, both heaving and waiting for the other to move and interrupt the tension rising with every passing second.

“One,” you began, voice low and teasing. Did you know what you did to him? “Two…”

Diego writhed in your hold, but it was no use. You had him. He was yours and he would be satisfied to be so for the rest of your days, if only you never let him go. His gaze flitted across your face, tracing the way your eyebrows furrowed and relaxed with the numbers, eyes still wide and filled with emotions he didn’t quite know how to read. Sweat beaded on your brow and stained your cheeks and yet still, he thought you were as perfect as you could be, mere inches from his own darting eyes.

“Four...four and a half…” your smile grew and you got a little closer, almost touching his face with your own. “Five…”

He didn’t dare to breathe.

“I win, Hargreeves.”

But despite the hushed declaration, you did not move. Your body stayed over his, hands pushing his own down with gentle force but keeping him locked under you. Your eyes remained on his own, locking them in place as your face grew nearer. Soon enough your nose was just touching his own, nudging softly and turning so it fit better against his lips, which were parted and so close to pressing against your own-

-but you pulled away.

Just as Diego’s eyes had shut, your weight left his and he was left to sit up confused and watch you stomp away. You slipped out of the ring and down to the ground with a soft thump. He watched you unwrap your knuckles and to his surprise, he saw your hands shake with the movement.

“This was a mistake,” you mumbled to yourself. He wasn’t sure if he was supposed to hear. “This was stupid, I have to-”

“-don’t go,” he mumbled. In one swift movement Diego had jumped back to his feet and pulled after you. You stumbled back a few paces; he raced after, hurrying to your side with an aggression he didn’t know he possessed. “Don’t go.”

“Diego, I-”

“-I pushed you away because I screwed up,” he said, all in one breath and so fast he wasn’t sure if you could understand him. “I messed this up. We’re only supposed to be friends, I know that, but I-I can’t not be in love with you, not when you’re that perfect and so beautiful and you make me smile e-even when I feel like the shittiest sh-sh-shit and-”

“-kiss me.”

“What?”

You stepped forward, angling yourself just under his chin. Your chest heaved. “Kiss me, asshole.”

And slowly his hands moved on their own accord, cupping your cheeks and holding you to him. His eyes darted down once, staring at the pink lips before reaching your own again for a silent affirmation. When you nodded in his hands he acted, pulling you to him quickly and pressing his lips against his own, finally.

It was fast and passionate, both beings pulling at the other, urging the other closer than the skin they already pressed against. His one hand left your jaw to hold your neck, angling your face so he could better caress it, smudging himself across your lips with little care. He felt your own touch against his back, sliding down to his hips and pulling -- without even thinking, he moaned, feeling your lower body roll up against him and leave his mind in overdrive.

You pulled away for air finally, gasping only to be pulled in again for a softer, gentler kiss. He pecked the corners of your mouth before finally taking your lower in between his teeth, biting softly before sucking on the tender swollen skin. He pulled away then, dropping his forehead to your own as you both took another breath.

“If…” you paused to inhale, grinning through the gasp of oxygen, “if I knew you were holding all that back, Diego, I would have kissed your ass a lot sooner.”

“I’m...I’m sorry…”

“Don’t be sorry,” you murmured. He felt your hands leave his waist, pulling up to the one he still had cradled against your cheek. Your head leaned into the gentle touch. Even as your fingers held his. “I just...is this why you stopped talking to me?”

Diego shook his head softly against your own. Once more his heart faltered and threatened to burst, but he ignored it. “No, I just...I realised that I was-”

“-sorry, I don’t - you have an eyelash.” He froze as your fingers stroked his cheek, pulling away the evidence that had caught your attention. Your eyes darted up to his for a moment, and he watched as they widened and brightened under his perplexed gaze. “Your eyes really are pretty.”

His heart stopped for a beat.

“What? What’s wrong?”

“That’s why I stopped!” he exclaimed. He pulled away from you then, gesticulating wildly around like the air was going to supply you with answers. “That’s why!”

You frowned, cocking your head like a lost puppy. “You...because of your pretty eyes?!”

“What? Wait, no, that’s not why.”

“I’m so confused right now, bud, and I just--”

“--last week,” he rushed, cutting you off before he could lose momentum again. “I took you home. You were wasted, and you kept talking and - and you told me I had pretty eyes.”

Still, you looked bewildered.

“I-I have been obsessed with you since the day I met you,” he said, soft and unsure if any of the words would come out right. Or if they themselves were the right ones to say. “I couldn’t help it. And I didn’t let myself act on it because I knew that it wouldn’t wo-wo-work out, you’d get mad and I’d lose you. I rathered having you as a friend, then losing you cause I was in love with you.”

“Love?” you questioned, barely a breath of a sound lingering between them.

“But that night, you went on and on and I realised then that I was too gone to keep it in. And I realised that you wouldn’t feel the same...and I didn’t want to hurt you, so I left. And…”

“Diego Hargreeves, that is the stupidest thing I have ever heard.”

His brow furrowed low, anger mingling with befuddlement on his flushed skin. “Hey, I-”

“-first of all, you really think I would just hate you because you thought of me as more than a friend?! Even if I didn’t like you - which I do, by the way - I wouldn’t do that, I value you too much. But second of all, you’re telling me that you never noticed how much I liked you back?!”

“I-”

“-I have felt like an idiot for the past year, holding in my feelings for you and wishing you could feel the same way. And when you left, I thought - I thought that was it, and that I screwed things up when I was drunk, which I guess I did but-”

“-you didn’t screw anything up, I did!”

“No you didn’t, I did! I’m the drunken initiator!”

“I shouldn’t have just left!”

“Okay, so we both screwed up!” you shouted, throwing your hands up in the air in exasperation. “But dammit, Diego, I have loved you for ages, and you - we - this is what it came to?!”

“Well, I-”

“-I can’t believe this!” you chortled. “All this time?!”

“I guess so,” he said, voice catching on the ‘so’. “I guess, yeah.”

“Holy crap.”

“Ha. Yeah.”

“I love you,” you giggled, breathless and still flushed, messy and beautiful in the shitty gym lighting. “I love you, Diego Hargreeves.”

His heart didn’t break. It didn’t even crack. Diego instead felt the slight twinge as the organ settled in his chest, content and buzzing with the panted cry. The breaklines of before didn’t feel so harsh, mended by your shiny eyes and swollen lips that he wanted to stare at until the end of his days. For once, his heart actually felt whole.

“I love you too,” Diego mumbled, smiling like a little kid. The muscles in his face, rusted over with age and disuse, groaned at the extreme grin but he kept it on anyways, smiling down at you with the strangest feeling of happiness coursing through his body. “A lot.”

And you beamed. “Have I ever told you, your eyes look like, a thousand times prettier when you smile?”

A/N: WHY DO I KEEP WRITING ALCOHOL BASED IDIOTS TO LOVERS FICS?? Have I any other creative thoughts?? Does this make me seem like that’s all I think about?? These are the thoughts that now run through my mind as I rush to post this...and truthfully, I don’t have an answer. I swear I’m a little more creative! I just...have a hankering for these things. Oops.

I wrote this weirdly super super fast and it’s super nonsensical, especially the middle bits? But I weirdly like it. I’m not sure. The plot is a ~little~ wonky but I’m rolling with it!

I’m open to make more stuff on here, I’ve gotten quite bad at it but I like writing these things as practice pieces. So, if you want to read more, requests are open and you can find a list of prompts (if you want them) in my masterlist. I’m putting out an updated list later on in the month, but I also am just open to have any sorts of requests. xx

(also as always - if you enjoyed and you want more, follow, reblog, and consider buying me a kofi! linked in my bio bc tumblr doesn’t like direct links on posts, please check it out if you’re feeling generous because I’m recently unemployed and any bit helps. but sharing this post and showing others the work is appreciated a great deal and i love you if you do!)

#diego hargreeves x reader #mine #diego hargreeves oneshot #diego hargreeves imagine #tua x reader #umbrella academy x reader #hargreeves x reader #gender neutral reader

209 notes · View notes

katelyn--renee · 4 years

Text

Out of the Fire (Part two)

Title: Out Of The Fire (Part two)

Fandom: Supernatural AU

Main Characters series: Reader, Lieutenant Firefighter!Dean Winchester, Lawyer!Sam Winchester, Jessica Winchester (Moore), Nurse!Lisa Braeden (Formerly Winchester), Ben Braeden-Winchester, Harper Winchester (OFC), Charlie Bradbury, Firefighter!Benny Lafitte, Firefighter!Jo Harvelle, Firefighter!Castiel Novak, Claire Novak, Mechanic!John Winchester, Firefighter Captain!Ellen Harvelle, Mechanic!Bobby Singer, Doctor!Arthur Ketch, Nick Vaught and many more!

Pairings: Dean x Reader (eventual), Dean x Lisa (past), Reader x Nick (past), Lisa x Ketch (current), Sam x Jessica (current)

Word count: ±2200 words

Series summary: A slow burn romance. Reader is trying to get away from her troubled past and start fresh; a new name, new town, new friends, and a new job. A clean slate. After years of planning and saving, she is able to open her own business. With the help of her best friend and business partner, Charlie Bradbury, and her new flirty firefighter friend, she is hopeful, even when disaster strikes and her past threatens to catch up with her years later.

Part two summary: Flashback to when you first met your green eyed hero and their budding romance.

Warnings series: NSFW, 18+ only! Fire or mentions of fire, fluff (so much fluff), angst, eventual smut, mutual pining, alcohol abuse, alcohol intoxication, mentions of domestic abuse (physical, verbal), mentions of miscarriage, mentions of adultery/cheating, mentions of death, dangerous or life threatening situations, stress, descriptions of injuries, blood, hospital scenes, character death.

Author’s note: Here is part two! I hope you enjoy this chapter and all it’s fluffy goodness! :)

A special thank you to @that-one-gay-girl and @deanwanddamons for being the wonderful beta’s that you are! Your feedback is always appreciated! Check out their awesome work and spread some love!

All graphics and dividers done by me! :)

If you like this story, please don’t hesitate to leave a like, comment and if you’re feeling extra generous, share! Your feedback gives me live and motivation! If you would like to be tagged in the series, please don’t hesitate to ask!

Thank you and let’s enjoy this ride together!

<<-- Read part one, here!

Out of the Fire Masterlist!

Interested in more of my work, check out the link below.

Masterlist

About five weeks ago.

The shop was busier than usual, but being the final days of summer, it was expected. It wasn't anything you or Charlie couldn't handle, of course, but it sure did make for long days and even longer nights of cleanup.

"Charlie, table two needs refills, table six never got their vanilla lattes, and table four is ready to pay." You announced as you joined your partner behind the counter with a handful of dirty mugs and plates, having just made one of many rounds through the seating area.

The two of you danced around each other gracefully, moving in harmony as you switched from one task to another. “On it.” She acknowledged, already preparing the missing drinks and throwing in a complimentary pastry for the mistake.

You set the pile of dishes down into the sink before turning to the next customer in line, flashing him a friendly smile. “Yes, hi, how can I help you?” You greeted urgently, looking up to meet a set of stunning green eyes. You faltered slightly, taken by surprise by his strikingly good looks.

He smiled, almost bashfully, as he began to place his order, seeming not to notice your hesitation. “A round of coffees, black, for me and my buddies ,” He motioned toward the booth near the large bay window which was occupied by three other bodies; two men and one woman, all of whom adorned matching uniforms. “Cream and sugar on the side. Oh, uh, larges… or eh, talls?” He added with a sheepish chuckle, clearly unfamiliar with the coffee house lingo.

You couldn’t help but giggle at that, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth to prevent yourself from smiling more and potentially embarrassing him. “Venti.” You corrected him playfully. You saw the confused look on his face, his head cocking like a confused puppy, before adding, “For our ‘large,’”

You used air quotes to emphasize your point, rolling your eyes at the technical terminology. “It’s venti.” You saw it the moment he understood what you were telling him, and he chuckled again, not missing the way he ducked his head to hide the slight flush to his freckled cheeks.

“Never too old to learn something new.” He chuckled again and winked at you, the gesture setting butterflies loose inside of your stomach. It was your turn to look away this time, your face hot with a blush. He fished his wallet from his dark blue cargo pants, looking at the assortment of baked goods.

“Throw in a few of those bagels and croissants, too, please.” He added, casting his gaze down at the display case once again. “Oh, and a piece of that cherry pie.” He added almost dreamily, pulling out a couple of twenties.

Upon further inspection, you took notice of the soot and ash that dirtied his face and darkened his hair in certain places. He had dark circles under his gorgeous eyes, too, clearly exhausted after a long shift. You glanced in the direction of his crew members, finding much of the same. “Long night?” You asked, trying to be friendly as much as you were curious.

“I look that rough, huh?” He teased, a look of mock offense accompanying his handsome features.

You shook your head, a smile still curving your lips at the corners, “Oh no, I didn’t mean it like that.” You clarified hastily as you calculated his order into the register, making a point to leave off the coffees; it was the least you could do for him… eh, them, right?

He winked again and laughed, the sound deep in his chest, assuring you that he was only teasing. “I know you didn’t,” The corner of his mouth turned up into a smile, his tongue darting out to wet his lips, watching your face and the way you tried to suppress your smile. “How much do I owe you, sweetheart?” He asked, glancing down at the display screen.

The term of endearment made your heart flutter slightly, and you couldn’t keep the smile from creeping onto your face again. You swallowed the feeling down, pressing the enter key before you read aloud his total.

“That’ll be $19.94, Mr. Firefighter.” He rose a questioning brow at the total, glancing up at the menu prices. “Coffee’s on the house.” You added quickly with a closed-lip smile, your eyes sincere. “It’s the least I can do for your services.”

Several emotions seemed to make their way across his face, contorting it briefly before settling on gratitude. “Thank you.” He said, his voice genuine. He held out one of the twenty-dollar bills, paying for his order. “That was really kind of you, truly.” He smiled softly, glancing down at the name tag attached to your apron. “(Y/N).”

A smile formed on your lips before you could stop it, and your cheeks flushed at the way he said your name, your eyes finding the name embroidered onto the left side of his dark blue button-up shirt, opposite of a silver badge over his heart. Red patches were on either sleeve, proudly showing off the station they serve. “It’s no trouble, Lieutenant Winchester...” You promised with a sly smile.

He laughed, appreciating your observation. “Dean.” He insisted as you accepted the bill. Your fingers touched, brushing against each other softly. The touch, however slight, was like an electric shock, igniting every part of your body.

There was an annoyed grunt behind the firefighter, but the two of you paid little attention to it. You put the money into the till and collected his change, but Dean insisted that he didn’t need it. He walked backwards to his table, his bottom lip drawn up between his teeth. The two of you couldn’t seem to stop watching each other, nor did you want to, silently flirting with your eyes.

You giggled when he bumped into an unoccupied table, watching as he almost knocked over its contents and awkwardly fumbled with the accompanying chair that nearly fell over. He rubbed the back of his neck and chuckled self-consciously, trying to conceal his embarrassment. He ducked his head when he got back to his table, his friends giving him a hard time.

He hid his face in his palms as a dark-haired man with scruff and blue eyes clapped a hand against Dean’s shoulder, booming with laughter. “Smooth,” You heard the blonde female tease, snickering at her partner. You watched them as you gathered up their order, blushing when you caught him stealing a few glances your way. When finished, you brought their order out to them personally, earning you another wink from the fireman.

The rest of the shift went by in a blur, unable to get those emerald eyes out of your head. Charlie had seemed to notice your distraction and, in perfect Charlie fashion, commented on it as you were closing up shop. “That fireman sure left his mark on you, huh?” She teased, a knowing smile drawing her lips up.

You scoffed at her and tried to play it off like you didn’t know what she was talking about… and failing. “W-What? No - No, I - Who? I don’t know what you’re talking about, Charlie.” You muttered, locking the doors and placing the keys into your pocket.

She looked skeptical and cocked her hip, propping a hand there. “Uh-huh, sure.” She stated, waving her hands. “And I’m not the Queen of Mordor.” She said sarcastically, “Oh wait, I am.” She said exaggeratedly with her hands thrown in the air, referencing her extracurricular activity of LARPing.

You rolled your eyes fondly at your best friend; she’d dragged you along to her LARPing weekends on more than one occasion, and you’d humored her, going along with it because it made Charlie happy. “You can’t fool me, sista, now spill the beans.” She insisted, following behind you with the broom as the pair of you cleaned up.

You sighed, wiping down one of the tables and the chairs that joined it, already knowing that you wouldn't win this battle against the feisty redhead. “I don’t know…” You hesitated, chewing on your bottom lip as you thought about the encounter. “I can't explain it, I don’t know how to explain it… but there was just something about him… y'know?" You recalled, picking up one of the chairs and putting it on the table. "I just… I can’t quite put my finger on it…"

Charlie giggled, "Bet you wish you could." She teased, clearly hinting at more than she said. You gasped and feigned innocence, throwing the towel at her. Charlie laughed more, catching the soiled cleaning cloth before it collided with her face. "Oh, come on (Y/N)! I know that look in a woman's eye. I’ve seen it dozens of times! You want him. Bad!"

She threw the cloth back, and you caught it with ease. "Jeez, you make me sound so desperate." You grumbled, not denying Charlie's observation, despite the dramatics.

Charlie hadn't missed a beat, and she grinned, a cocky sparkle in her eyes. "So you do like him." She chimed accusingly, clearly happy to be right.

You rolled your eyes again, moving onto the next table as Charlie continued sweeping under the one you'd just cleared. "Okay. Yeah, fine." You admitted, "I thought he was cute and charming and sexy in that uniform,"

Charlie made an ‘I-knew-it’ face, but you continued before she could make a sly remark, "But it doesn't matter. It's not like I'm ever gonna see him again." You stated with a reluctant sigh, spraying down the next table with the cleaning agent, trying to hide the disappointment lingering in your voice. You began to scrub at a stubborn spot on the table, trying to distract yourself.

Charlie frowned sadly, reading into your mood, and leaned the broom down against the table before closing the space between you. "I'm sorry for being pushy. It's just that you work all the time. When was the last time you did anything for yourself?" You were about to answer when she held up a finger, "Other than this café. This doesn't count, this is work."

She had a point. You couldn't remember the last time you'd done anything that didn't involve this little shop. "Exactly. I just wanna see you have some fun and that," She thumbed over her shoulder toward the door, referring to Dean, "was fun." You chuckled softly, your cheeks getting warm at the thought.

"You deserve to live a little,” She put her arms on your shoulders and squeezed affectionately, “Especially after what that snake put you through." You frowned at the reminder, dread coiling inside of your stomach and a frown pulled at your lips at the mention of your ex, Nick.

Like always, Charlie didn’t let you get too lost in your thoughts, "And who knows, maybe he has an equally attractive sister for me." She added with a playful shrug and a giggle, effectively distracting you. "Fate works in mysterious ways, sista; you never know what she might throw your way." She added mysteriously, wiggling her eyebrows for added effect.

As it turns out, Charlie was right. Fate did work in mysterious ways because, in the weeks that followed, Dean continued to show up, sometimes with his crew, but mostly by himself. The times he showed up varied, depending on his work scheduled, which you soon noticed was quite busy. Regardless of the hour, he always showed.

It wasn't long before you memorized his order by heart; a venti coffee, black, and a slice of pie; whichever flavor was baked for the day's special. The flavor never seemed to be an issue for the firefighter, but it didn’t take you long to realize that cherry was clearly his favorite, with pecan a close second.

The pair of you flirted and subtly got to know each other as time went on, teetering somewhere between acquaintances and friends. He’d flirt. You’d flirt. But it never went any further than that.

Charlie teased you about it the whole time, of course. She wouldn’t be your best friend if she hadn’t. You’d just roll your eyes or shake your head every time she’d urge you to "grow a pair and ask him out already."

You wanted to. Of course, you wanted to; you’d be an idiot not to want that.

But you didn't, of course, because you were too embarrassed and too afraid to act on your feelings. You'd done that once before already, and you paid one hell of a price for it. Hell, in a way, you still were. Nick left such a nasty scar on your heart; you weren't sure if you could ever love again. You were in a constant state of fear, afraid of being hurt again.

Charlie, being the wonderful best friend that she is, always tried to remind you that love… true love… would never hurt you. That real love was the stuff of magic and fairy tales. That what you had with Nick wasn’t love. It helped, a little, but that fear never truly went away, you just sort of learned to live with it.

Maybe someday you’ll feel differently.

And there you have it. Part two is complete. I hope you enjoyed that chapter as much as I did. Awkward/adorable Dean is one of my favs. Haha.

As always, thanks for reading!

Read part three, here! -->>

Taglist!

Supernatural

@akshi8278

Out of the Fire (series)

@vicmc624 // @anotherspnfanfic // @krazykelly // @compresshischest09 // @thefamilybusiness

105 notes · View notes

emilycollins00 · 4 years

Note

Hey, if you want to (you don‘t have to through) could you maybe write a Muku x Reader, in which Muku‘s crush writes him a anonymous love letter but he recognizes his crush’s handwriting? But if you don’t to write it for Muku, than it can be somebody else! Like idk... Juza or Sakuya (that would have been cute too). Everybody’s just great🥺❤️ Have a great day!~ (*´꒳`*)🌸

Sorry for the delay, love. You are the sweetest thing! I don’t really mind if reader is the same age, also crushes are the cutest thing so... Muku it is! 💕

Hope you enjoy!

Title: Love letter

Pairing: Muku Sakisaka x reader

“I don’t know Yuki-kun, I’m sure Sakyo-san also wants the play to be a success. Why would he try to make it difficult?”

With school hours finally ended for the day, both middle schoolers talked as they prepared to go back to the dorm.

Yuki clicked his tongue “If he wanted the performance to be good he should at least be more lenient with the budget” he mused opening his locker, already making a mental list of the materials he would have to buy to make up for the cut he had been informed in the morning “That money grabbing yakuza… he could at least think how much work is to piece everything together”

“I-I’m sure you’ll do an amazing job! We’ll all make sure to help if it gets too much!”

“Of course I was already counting on it. I haven’t been training you all for nothing”

Muku laughed nervously at his retort.

“Muku-kun!”

His heart made a leap at the unexpected sound of your voice. Turning around, he found you running in his direction from the crowded hall.

“Y/N-san?”

Once you managed to catch up you held a hand up, asking silently for a few seconds to regain breath. Finally you lifted your head, cheeks slightly flushed from the sprint “Sorry, I wanted to give back the volume you let me before you left!”

“Ah, you shouldn’t have had to bother coming all the way!” Muku stuttered, taking the manga from your hands and holding it against his chest. He glanced at you hopeful “Um... What did you think about it?”

You clapped your hands, beaming “Oh, I couldn’t put it down! The main character was so sweet it made me want to cheer for them so much!”

Muku felt his previous tension being released. He had been the one who had recommended it after all. He smiled happily “I thought so too! T-the way the festival had…”

As always happened when he talked to you lately, Muku hoped he wasn’t blushing too much or sounded too weird. It had been a few months since you both started exchanging romance novels due to mutual interest and the more you got to know each other, the more Muku noticed he had developed quite the crush on you.

“I see you guys are leaving already. Practice?”

Muku played with the string of his schoolbag, self-consciously “W-well, spring troupe is next so we usually make street acts for the time being until Tsuzuru-san writes ours- ah, he’s the person I told you that writes such wonderful stories!”

“Oh! I hope summer comes soon then” you chuckled, making Muku’s stomach stir “I have to go now too, see you both tomorrow!” .

Once you were out of sight, Yuki glanced at the former athlete sighing with a hand placed in his chest and rolled his eyes “Why don’t you just invite them somewhere? I doubt they’d say no”

“Uh?”

“Y/N” his pointed the way you had left with his chin “You are painfully obvious, you know”

Muku waved his arms neglectingly, flushing “I-I can’t! If only I had the charismatic aura of Itaru-san or the elegance of Citron-sama b-but I don’t have any of those qualities and...!

“I keep telling you those two are the worst examples you should be trying to learn from”

He kept shaking his head stubbornly. You had become someone he truly admired for always doing their best. Your approach and attitude were so nice, so warm... The thought of dating was too much! “A-anyway, shouldn’t we hurry to get to the dorm?”

Yuki squinted his eyes, but opted to shrug it off “Sure, I need to change before going to that thrift shop by Veludo Station. Last time the worker there showed me some…”

Muku relaxed inwardly, seeing Yuki was already on work mode. As he opened the locker to change his shoes though, something white fell from inside. He crouched down to the floor to retrieve it “A letter?”

He turned it, but saw no sign anywhere, which made him tilt his head confused. Why was a letter inside…?

Something clicked in his head as he stood up, blue eyes staring at the white envelope.

It couldn’t be real. He must be daydreaming.

“Maybe I could even- Muku?”

Oh god, what if he had been transported to one of his mangas? What if he now had to overcome the plot of the story to be able to get back and…?

“Hey! Earth to Muku, geez!”

Snapping out of it, he finally focused on the annoyed green-haired in front of him “Yuki-kun…? Have you also been transported into the manga world?”

“What are you talking about” the young designer sighed, crossing his arms over his chest when he noticed the envelope “Was that inside your locker?”

“You can see it too?!”

“Of course I can idiot. You didn’t have that before”

Muku nodded to himself blinking at the letter. So he wasn’t imagining it…

“Well, aren’t you going to open it?” Yuki leaned his back on the lockers, bending curiously.

“Yuki-kun”

“Mhm”

“I-I can’t”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“Mucchan received a WHAT?!”

“Could you say it any louder, you idiotic dog? It’s just a letter, who cares”

“Mukkun, I’m shook!” as Taichi kept crying about wanting to find love too, Kazunari jumped in completely elated “Isn’t this like the highlight of your school life mangas in real life? You def have to open it!”

Taichi’s reactions and Kazunari’s comments didn’t reach Muku, still zoning in and out of the conversation. After a long banter in school, he hadn’t had the guts to open the letter, so Yuki decided for him to take it home and give him time to process the situation.

Which is the reason he was now sitting on the couch in the middle of the lounge, surrounded.

It was true he had often dreamed of love letters. Who wouldn’t? They were so romantic! To receive a handwritten confession maybe even in poetry professing an undying love, rushing off to a midnight rendezvous with one’s true love… the mere thought made Muku swoon.

But one thing was his imagination, and another one real life, as much as he sometimes mixed both.

To think something like that actually happened to him didn’t feel real.

“I…I already told Yuki-kun this must be a mistake” he murmured fidgeting, not able to take his eyes off the yet-to-be-open envelope on the table “Who would want to write to someone who is a half-pint, small, dried-up stale beansprout like me?”

“You sure s’not a letter for a challenge, right” Juza grumbled from the other couch, throwing daggers to the letter.

“J-juza-san?!”

“Why am I not surprised that’s your first thought, Standard Gangster”

Muku lifted his head gasping with eyes wide open, scared “I-I hadn’t even think about that! What if I did something and now they are looking for revenge and…!”

“S’okay, Muku” Juza stopped him, cracking his knuckles “I’ll take care of ‘em if that’s the case”

“Whoa, whoa, hold on, dude!” Kazunari laughed nervously, placing a hand his shoulder to calm him down “Before we decide it’s something like that, how about opening it?”

“Mr. Extrovert is right for once” Yuki rested his chin on the back on his hand “You are taking too long”

As everyone watched expectantly, Muku glanced at the letter once more, swallowing with difficulty. Even just looking at it made his heartbeat go wild. He shook his head, took a deep breath, and carefully tore the edges apart.

The first thought that came to his mind was the fact that the colour of the paper was the same as his hair.

Then, the fact that his whole face was probably heating up after he read his name.

“Mucchan?”

“Just tell me who I have to beat up”

The summer troupe member lifted his head flustered, forgetting where he was “S-sorry I- it’s okay, Ju-chan! um, it’s not that type of letter!”

As he kept reading the content, Muku felt his heart ringing in his ears as well as the heat reaching and warming his cheeks. The message of the letter was definitely a confession worthy of a manga and the way he was being described… nothing could compare to what he was feeling at that moment, eyes fixed on the letter, practically glowing.

By the second read though, he noticed something weird. A somewhat familiar feeling, as if he had read this before.

He read it again. What was it?

“Let me see, let me see!” Kazunari soon moved to his side, reading with him and whistling “Mukkun whoever this is you have to find them, this is totes cute!”

He didn’t answer, still in deep thought. This handwriting… where had he…?

You.

A flashback of him looking at your notes in class and thinking how beautiful your handwriting looked crossed his mind. Muku covered his mouth from the sudden revelation.

“Muku!?”

“You okay, Mukkun?”

If he was blushing before, his face must now be a downright crimson mess.

Could it be a joke? Or was he daydreaming again? B-but that WAS your handwriting. He had caught himself so many times staring that it.

He checked once more afraid. No, it definitely was yours.

“B-but Y/N-san, they…”

“Y/N?” the surprise on Yuki’s face when he heard your name was palpable. He grabbed the letter, smiling at the end “Well, aren’t you lucky Wonder Boy”

“Who’s Y/N?”

“Ah, Muku’s crush”

“WAIT- MUKKUN’S!?”

“MUCCHAN’S?!”

“Muku, you…”

“W-wait, what if they did this as a way to test my acting? O-or to try to recreate a scene for a new manga?” his mind kept rejecting the idea “They said they wanted to see our performance, what if tomorrow they keep asking me what happened today and I can’t act naturally and then they think I was spying on them only to be told that-!

“Muku, please” Yuki rolled his eyes “As if someone like them would do this as a prank”

The young actor looked around everyone in the room insecure and then again at your letter, taking it with both hands carefully “It’s just… I’m just me” he finally whispered.

Kazunari chuckled softly, ruffling his hair.

“Well, that’s plenty for us, you know it! And judging by the letter it’s the same for them”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Next day Muku paced around the entrance of the school, waiting for you. No matter how many mangas he had read, nothing had given him the answer for how to act.

Was this how the heroines felt? His lower body was barely being able to sustain him.

“Muku-kun, you called for me?”

Okay, stay calm Muku. Y-you got this! He forced himself not to let his nerves show as you walked up “Y-yeah! Um, do you have a moment to talk?”

“Sure?” you tilted your head curiously.

He had to avert his gaze “t-The thing is, um; yesterday this was on my locker…” Muku took out the letter from his pocket, praying for a reaction.

You stared at it dumbfounded, and for the first time, Muku saw your cheeks growing slightly red. He kept talking “I… I somehow recognized your handwriting! S-so I wanted to say that I too-!”

He couldn’t finish as he watched you covering your face, which caused him to frown confused “Y-Y/N-san...?”

“Please hide me” Muku could tell your ears were bright red at this point “Sorry, this is not… it wasn’t…”

You groaned to yourself. You worked so hard to not let it show, appearing even before he saw the letter and your handwriting was what gave it away in the end…? Talk about embarrassment.

“Ugh, I’m so lame”

“It wasn’t lame! Not at all!” Muku’s heart squeezed, talking louder than he had imagined, but he wanted to make his point clear this time. Lame was the last thing that could have crossed his mind when he read it “You are so cool and the letter was beautiful!”

“I-It was…?”

He nodded although you couldn’t see him “Y/N-san” you felt his hands holding yours, taking them away from your face. Once you couldn’t hide anymore you looked up, a blushing Muku welcoming you with a warm smile.

“If you are okay with me, would... would you like to meet up sometime?”

He really looked like a prince.

_______________________________________________________________

Wishing you all a wonderful day! 💕

#a3 #a3! act! addict! actors!#act addict actors #A3! Actor Training Game #a3! muku #muku sakisaka #muku x reader #a3 muku

63 notes · View notes

backtothestart02 · 3 years

Text

A Weekend of Firsts - 2/? | grandice fanfiction

A/N: Welp, this is gonna be more than 3 chaps, I fear. Enjoy? XD

...

Chapter 2 -

Grant stepped out of the shower the next morning and wondered what his life had become. Not a night of tossing and turning or cooking up his usual hangover fix for the minor headache he woke up with or what should’ve been an extremely relaxing, invigorating hot shower had erased the memory of Candice in his arms the night before.

The feel of her body arching up against his and her tongue sneaking into his mouth, her lips pressed to his in sloppy, passionate kisses, her legs wrapped around his own still remained ingrained into the forefront of his mind.

And her neck.

God, her neck.

He could spend forever drawing moans from sucking kisses down her neck.

It was everything he’d been dreaming of since first meeting her during their chemistry test months ago.

He’d convinced himself she must not be interested if all his flirting and paying her attention in the last month and a half, in addition to when they shot the pilot, got nothing but an obligatory smile and some laughter at his jokes.

Finally, he’d found someone who thought he was hysterical though. That was a relief. He was starting to think he maybe wasn’t that funny.

But it was nothing that a friend wouldn’t do. He couldn’t resist flirting with her, but if all she wanted was friendship, he’d shut it down as soon as she said it was too much.

Last night he’d learned it wasn’t too much at all, and she actually did feel the same. She just didn’t want to act on it, and he couldn’t figure out why.

There was a voice in the back of his head yelling at him for having taken her back to her room before things got really heated the night before. But he knew it wasn’t right. He’d been tipsy at best, and she’d definitely been drunk. If they were ever to have a real chance, he had to do things the right way.

After getting dressed, he returned to see what was left of his hangover concoction in the kitchenette part of his suite. Luckily, the kitchen downstairs had had all the ingredients he needed to make it. He’d just needed to call for room service to deliver, and deliver they did. Since he hadn’t had much, given his headache had been pretty minor, there was more than enough left to deliver to Candice, who definitely would need some.

His only problem was would she let him in the door or would she be mad at him for making him leave in the midst of their little…almost sex. He winced, but then decided to push it out of his mind as best as he could. He gathered the drink in his arms, grabbed his room key and padded the short distance down the hall to her room.

He knocked lightly on the door. No answer. He tried again, this time a little louder.

“Candice?”

He heard a moan in response. That was good news. She was responsive and probably still in bed. He couldn’t be coming at a better time. Probably.

She still didn’t come to the door though, so he knocked again.

“Candice?”

“I didn’t order room service!” she called out, and he smiled, imagining her pout and her frazzled hair as she stretched out enough to yell at the closed door.

He had to compose himself before continuing.

“It’s not room service. It’s me.” He paused. “Grant.”

There was a really long pause then, to the point that he wondered if she’d gone back to sleep.

“Candice?”

He was super close to knocking again, his hand raised to the door in in a loose fist. Luckily – or not, for him – she responded just before his knuckle hit the smooth wood.

“Go away,” she said grumpily.

His heart fell in the pit of his stomach, but he told himself not to take it personally.

“I have something,” he tried. “For your…headache.”

He heard some huffing on the other side and then the sound of the heavy door opening before he was faced with a frazzled looking Candice Patton. He held up the green drink innocently.

She huffed, but took it straight out of his arms, downing it as fast as she could.

“Wait, that’s not what I-”

She didn’t listen, only took a breath halfway through to mutter, “This tastes disgusting.”

He chuckled lightly but couldn’t get a word in until she’d finished the batch.

“What is it?” she asked, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand.

He grimaced. “You don’t want to know.”

She eyed him up and down, looking highly suspicious.

“What?” he asked, grinning now.

“You look better than I do.” She pouted. He found it adorable.

“I’ve showered and dressed. You’ll look better than me in no time if you do the same.”

She sighed, shoved the glass back at his chest and closed the door.

Once again, he was alone in the hall.

“I’ll see you down at breakfast,” she said from the other side, and he supposed that was the best he was going to get.

“See you down there,” he muttered to himself, and before long he found himself headed down the hall and entering the elevator alone.

…

Candice waited until she heard the elevator doors close before turning around and leaning back against the door.

She was in Hell. Literal Hell.

Well, maybe not so much after the drink. She might not have to vomit so much anymore, and she could already feel her headache dissipating.

But what was she going to do about Grant?

Here he was being so kind and thoughtful, and he was an actual gentleman last night. He’d saved her from making the biggest mistake of her life. Putting her current job in jeopardy by messing with their onscreen chemistry due to pursuing an offscreen relationship with her number one co-star.

A one-night stand? What had she been thinking?

She’d been drunk and horny, and he’d been right there was what she’d been thinking.

And it wasn’t just that he’d been conveniently positioned beside her. He was the guy she couldn’t stop thinking about even if she wanted to. She wanted to be in that bed with him, with him kissing her, making love to her – or about to. She’d wanted that almost since she met him.

They just had a…a spark.

It was what made their onscreen chemistry so good. It wasn’t just onscreen. It was everywhere. It was in the looks, the dancing, the laughter, the sincerity. And now she knew, she was 100% certain that it was mutual. He wanted her just as badly.

It hurt her to know that though, because obviously they couldn’t risk what they had for something that could be fleeting.

Well, how fleeting could it be if her feelings for him had been just as strong from when they first met till now? If not stronger?

She nibbled on her bottom lip and headed into the bathroom, hoping a shower would erase all things Grant Gustin from her mind.

Of course it didn’t. She felt refreshed when she stepped out onto the towel she’d placed on the tile floor, another towel wrapped around her body and her hair. She didn’t feel hungover. She felt like she could take on the day.

But her heart still felt heavy, and it yearned for him.

Hell, she even dressed for him. She wore what she wanted to wear for herself, of course, but she was thinking of him while she did it. Would he like it? Would he stare? Would he even notice?

She shook her head, trying to rid her thoughts of him again, but it was impossible.

Finally, she slipped into her shoes to head downstairs to breakfast, where she recalled she’d told him she’d meet him. How would she survive that? Without blushing? Without staring at his lips? Without either shunning him or asking to pick up where they left off?

What would he say if she decided on the latter? Maybe all she needed was a one-night stand to get him out of her system.

Maybe…

As it turned out, she didn’t have to go far at all. When she opened her hotel room door, there he stood with a plate of bagels, fruit, and cereal, and an orange juice to drink.

“Hey,” he said, that ridiculously sexy grin back on his face. “They, uh, were closing up. So I quick grabbed some stuff for you and just brought it up. I hope…is this okay?”

“Yeah, totally,” she said immediately. “Thank you.”

She reached for the tray, then found herself grasping air as he moved past her into the room.

“Uh…okay.”

“Sorry, I just wouldn’t want you to spill anything on your pretty dress.” He looked over his shoulder after setting the tray down on her bed. “It is pretty by the way.” He turned all the way around and approached her. “You’re pretty.”

She swallowed, her eyes dipping to his lips again, then figured this is it, now or never, before she could talk herself out of it.

She went up on her tiptoes and tried to reach his lips, but she was too short. She almost tripped over herself instead, floundering. He caught her though, gripping her elbows to keep her steady. She couldn’t look at him. She was so embarrassed.

“Candice,” he whispered, and hesitantly, so hesitantly, she looked up at him.

He caught her lips with his own and kissed her, his lips slanting over hers to escalate and deepen the kiss. Candice’s arms swung up and around his neck, and he pulled her flush against him, kissing her harder, giving himself over to her, everything he had to that kiss, pushing her up against the wall and kissing, kissing, kissing until he couldn’t breathe – and she probably couldn’t either – and lifting his head.

“W-w-wow, whoa.”

Trembling, she let her hands fall from around his neck, one lifting to her lips. She could still feel the pressure, the buzz, his lips had created there.

“That was…”

“Yeah,” he said, and his voice was gravelly.

She laughed nervously.

“Your voice is really hot after you’ve been kissing someone.” She licked her lips.

He managed to smirk, then sunk his fingers into her hair.

“Just after I’ve been kissing you, I think.”

She smiled tremulously. Then without warning, she seemed to figure out that he wasn’t exactly in clothes meant for panels, interviews, autographs, etc.

“What?” he asked, finding the little crease in her forehead absolutely adorable.

“I uh…you probably need to change your clothes, right?”

He looked down. “Yeah.”

“And um…wipe my lipstick off your lips?” She reached up to wipe it away, but he caught her hand and met her eyes.

“Nah, I think I’ll keep it there.”

“But what if someone sees?”

“Who’s gonna see? We’re not even famous yet.”

His eyes were twinkling in the faint light of the room, and Candice found herself absolutely enraptured by them.

“Please?” she requested, biting her bottom lip.

He groaned aloud.

“I can’t resist you, Candice.”

Reaching down, he used a fistful of his t-shirt to wipe the lipstick free of his face.

“Better?” he asked.

She frowned.

“Now what?”

“Well, now it’s on your shirt! It won’t take much for people to-”

He cut her off by pressing his lips to hers in a quick kiss, then moving past her towards the door.

“I’m one door down. It’ll be fine. No one’s in the hall. They’re all in the lobby.”

“Wait!”

He stopped and turned around right as he set his hand on the doorknob.

“You want me to go shirtless?” He leaned towards her. “Because I will if you want me to.”

“No!” she said, scandalized all at once. “I don’t want anyone to-”

“See what belongs to only you?” He grinned unashamedly.

“Oh, my God, no.” Her face licked with flames. She could hardly breathe. “I mean, you don’t belong to me. We’re not together. This was just…just…”

“A hot kiss between co-workers offscreen?”

She couldn’t speak.

He pressed another quick kiss to her face, but this one hit her cheek since her mouth was hanging open.

“I’ll see you at the first panel. Maybe we’ll meet in the elevator, and…kiss some more.”

He winked, and then he was opening the door and disappearing into the hall.

Candice’s mouth was still hanging open when the door shut. She stood with her back to it much like she’d done hardly an hour or two earlier. She couldn’t remember what time it had been, only that she felt much more frazzled than she’d looked then.

She’d just made out with Grant. Again. While not drunk. And she hadn’t put a stop to it. She’d initiated it even!

She blew a lock out of her face and slowly slumped against the wood until her butt hit the carpeted floor.

Oh, damn.

#grandice #fanfiction #grandice fanfiction #backtothestart02 fanfiction #a weekend of firsts #chapter 2

9 notes · View notes

officialleotolstoy · 3 years

Text

Oh Natasha/Andrei brainrot we’re really in it now, aka Natasha/Andrei playlist annotations!

Honestly the age gap is so inherently uncomfortable it’s difficult for me to really ship this but I think in terms of the REALLY low bar of W&P marriages/almost-marriages, it’s one of the better ones because they at least mutually care about each other. It’s also just devastating on principle!

There are several distinct sections of song on here, this is one of the few I’ve actually put in a significant order, so I’m going to break it down into that.

Part 1: Initial Meeting/Falling In Love The First Time/General

Absolutely Smitten - dodie

“She wants to dance around the room, kiss you until her lips turn blue”

This song really reminds me of their first meeting when they’re both like 👀 at each other. I like how it captures the excitement but also nerves of the girl, which I feel like is an important feature of Natasha’s part of the relationship.

Helpless - Philippa Soo

“Tryin' to catch your eye from the side of the ballroom”

Sorry to all the ex-Hamilton stans I jumpscared with this, but it’s about the Philippa Soo Singing About Falling In Love vibe. Also the quoted lyric reminds me of their iconic dance scene, or at least the bits leading up to that.

To Noise Making (Sing) - Hozier

“Honey, the look of it was as sweet as the sound; Your head tilt back, your funny mouth to the clouds”

This reminds me of the scene where she sings for him and he’s like WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH im in love! I paraphrase, but you get the idea.

Golden Years - David Bowie

“Look at that sky, life's begun”

This is objectively the stupidest song on here. It’s here because I think it’s funny to imagine the iconic Natasha/Andrei dance just being the Golden Years dance from A Knight’s Tale, HOWEVER the quoted lyric is in fact Andreicore.

Stop The World I Wanna Get Off With You - The Arctic Monkeys

“And I know we got places to go, we got people to see/Think we both oughta put 'em on hold”

‘Wren there are several songs that are on this playlist AND your Andrei/Pierre playlist’ Thank you for noticing it’s because if Tolstoy can recycle the same lines of dialogue for these relationships I can recycle the same songs! This song is just. I Hate Everyone Except You :) which is deeply Andrei @ both of them. But also like wanting life to stop so you can just hang out with Your People.

Strawberry Blond - Mitski

“I love everybody because I love you”

I’m pretty sure someone once pointed out how this lyric fit Andrei/Natasha once in a post and I cannot for the life of me remember who but that made an impression on me. Mystery person, thanks <3 Also I forgot this was a Mitski song??

The Anchor - Bastille

“Bring me some hope by wandering into my mind”

One of Thee things about their relationship that sticks out to me is how Natasha is so lifelike and her very existence gives Andrei hope for the world. It’s so. It’s so much!

Something After All - Starry

“You’ve turned my world around”

Like I said above, falling in love with Natasha really changes Andrei’s entire worldview! I also think “I've spent years building up walls” is very Andrei, and Natasha kind of brought them down, like what happens in the song.

Cosmic Love - Florence + The Machine

“A falling star fell from your heart and landed in my eyes”

IT’S ABOUT THE SPACE METAPHORS FOR LOVE. THIS IS NO ONE ELSE FROM GREAT COMET’S FAULT.

Cold Cold Man - Saint Motel

“I know I am a cold cold man: quite slow to pay you compliments or public displayed affections”

It’s about being generally not very emotional or expressive but being devoted to the person anyway...very Andrei-ish.

Ophelia - The Lumineers

“I don't feel nothing at all and you can't feel nothing small”

The quoted lyric just seems like a really good summary of their dynamic, but I also think “Heaven help a fool who falls in love” works well for bitter post-elopement vibes, so this song was difficult to place.

Part 2: Andrei Leaving For Abroad

Misbehavin’ - Pentatonix

For some reason this is on both the Nat/Andrei and Natasha playlists and I’m too lazy to change it. Just go look at those annotations.

No One Else - Great Comet

Duh

To a Poet - First Aid Kit

“I got on a plane and flew far away from you, though unwillingly I left”

This song makes me think of Andrei abroad missing Natasha :( Honey you’ve got a big storm coming

Part 3: Post-Elopement Breakup Songs

I Hope Your Husband Dies - Amigo The Devil

“All the distance that we've spent apart will never have to mean a thing”

This song is VERY much Andrei about Anatole. “Now you're with this asshole, you expect me to believe it's going to last” really works because her relationship with Anatole was never going to last, whether or not she knew that. And “I'm not so much afraid of being alone, just kind of feel I've had enough/And time and time again, time reminds me you'll never be my own/We'll never have a house to decorate, a place that we can call our home” as an Andrei thing makes me very sad!!!

Ruins - First Aid Kit

“Ruins, all the things we built assured that they would last”

I think you can safely say their relationship was in ruins after the elopement attempt. I also think “I lost you, didn't I? First I think I lost myself” is something Natasha would think about the whole scenario

Half of My Heart - John Mayer

“Half of my heart's got the right mind to tell you that I can't keep loving you with half of my heart”

I think this is supposed to be more of an “I don’t love you anymore and that’s on me” song, but I like to mentally frame it in the context of Andrei after the elopement refusing to take back Natasha. I also think all the bits about the singer’s love interest changing the singer’s outlook on life before really fits, like “Lonely was the song I sang 'til the day you came, showing me another way”

Love Like Ghosts - Lord Huron

“You don't want me baby please don't lie/Oh but if you're leaving, I gotta know why”

It’s all about the singer being haunted by a love that doesn’t necessarily reciprocate on the same level, and I think that really fits Andrei’s mindset. It breaks my heart to think about him trying to figure out what he did wrong, why he wasn’t enough for Natasha, and so that quoted lyric really makes me just. :(

Cold Day In Heaven - Delta Rae

“Keep thinking bout when we started, so innocent/Your heart was a mess and I was lost in it”

This whole song is so good for them, it’s essentially just a couple being disappointed that their relationship didn’t work out well. The quoted lyric is so. AAAAHHH. because both of their hearts were messes but for different reasons, Andrei was so hopeless and bleak but Natasha was so naive and not ready for it and it’s so. It’s so Much. Also “We watched, the stars fell, and oh you know we let them/We said it’ll never happen, we said it’ll never happen to us/But it’s a cold day in heaven my love” gets me because 1) star/sky references :( and 2) Natasha especially did say it’d never happen to them, she was adamant that she’d love Andrei forever and that uh. I think we all know how well that worked out!

2 Months. - Zach Adkins

Someone You Loved - Lewis Capaldi

“I let my guard down and then you pulled the rug”

This is kind of a generic betrayal/breakup/I-miss-you song, but I think it works. Especially with “I kinda liked the way you numbed all the pain” and the focus on the singer’s lover getting them through difficult times and then abandoning them.

The Night We Met - Lord Huron

“Take me back to the night we met”

I think people are legally obligated to have this song on any playlist for a couple that doesn’t end well. It’s generic but it’s good! The entire Strange Trails album my BELOVED!

Careless Whisper - George Michael

“I should have known better than to cheat a friend and waste a chance that I'd been given, so I'm never gonna dance again the way I danced with you”

UNIRONICALLY THIS SONG. I think it’s the focus on dancing as like a significant marker of the relationship for me, especially given how heavily adaptations focus on their dance at that ball. The quoted lyric reminds me of Natasha’s mindset after all of this. Also “We could have been so good together, we could have lived this dance forever, but now, who's gonna dance with me? Please stay” reminds me of Natasha asking him to forgive her. Not to actually get sad over Careless Whisper but. :,(

With Or Without You - U2

“And you give yourself away”

The quoted lyric is in reference to the elopement in my head, and “I can’t live with or without you” is like. Andrei can’t continue on and let her back into his life, he admits that he can’t forgive her, but he also has no real will to live after she betrays him and goes off to die in war.

Atlantis - Seafret

“We've built this town on shaky ground”

“This town” is in reference to their relationship, and I like the acknowledgment that there was never a great foundation to begin with. And “maybe I’m not built for love” as an Andrei lyric is a little heartbreaking! Other than that it’s just a Breakup Song.

I Don’t Wanna See You Cryin’ Anymore - Adam Melchor

“I don't wanna be the reason you can't trust me like before/My head's in my hands as I'm shaking on the bathroom floor”

This reminds me of Natasha’s deep guilt over her betrayal of Andrei. The implication that Andrei would ever let anyone see him cry is a bit much for me, just ignore that HFJAHDHSH

Part 4: Reconciling While Andrei ✨Dies✨

Fake It - Bastille

“We can never go back, we can only do our best to recreate”

This whole is song is about trying to move forward from bad things in the past with your lover which is the whole vibe! But I also think it shows some reluctance on the part of the singer to forget, and a bit of a desperation to be able to leave the mistakes in the past. “Help me turn a blind eye” really captures that. I like this as the early stages of them reconnecting, because I think it’s realistic to have Andrei especially be wary but wanting it to get better.

Bad Blood - Bastille

“All this bad blood here, won’t you let it dry?”

Letting go of a grudge and trying to move on vibes!

Let It All Go - Birdy, Alvaro Soler

“We’re strong enough to let it go”

All their hurt surrounding the elopement is the Thing they’re letting go of in this case.

Flaws - Bastille

“You have always worn your flaws upon your sleeve and I have always buried them deep beneath the ground”

The quoted lyric just feels like their general dynamic to me. Natasha is so open about everything and does indeed wear her heart on her sleeve whereas Andrei represses every emotion he’s ever felt. I think this is a post-elopement song because of “Dig them up; let’s finish what we started”. That feels like them reexamining their relationship and what went wrong and trying again.

Moscow - Autoheart

“All I need’s a fraction of your happy heart”

This song is so 🥺. “We both know what we’ve got to do: head back to where the magic grew” reminds me of them accepting their reconnection and moving on and trying to rekindle whatever was between them. And “Let’s get a dog, an Irish red setter, it’s all we need to get better” feels emblematic of them looking forward to domestic happiness as the solution. And the quoted lyric screams Andrei about Natasha.

The Heart Is A Muscle - Gang of Youths

“I will look at love as more than just an instrument of pain”

Not to be off topic but this whole album is so good every single song makes me feel SHRIMP EMOTIONS god. Also the whole thing is very Andreicore and I had to stop myself from adding every song to his playlist. But I digress. This song is all about having been hurt by love in the past (“I let bad love betray me once”) but deciding to open your heart again which is very them! “I haven't had enough and I wanna love someone” AAAAHHHH. “I am human now and terrified, but want it all the same” Mr. GangOfYouths im going INSANE! “I just ask you to be patient if you’ll have me still” HELLO? Not to quote the whole song but “I wanna be loved, I wanna be whole again, so tuck my hair behind my ears and touch my soul again” as an Andrei/Natasha lyric...I need to sit down. Can you all tell this song makes me go all kinds of crazy. And this isn’t even my favorite song off the album!

Shrike - Hozier

“I couldn’t utter my love when it counted, ah but I’m flying like a bird to you now”

This song feels very “we tried to have a relationship a while ago and it didn’t work out that well but I still love you we could try again” to me which fits this time very well!

Part 5: Andrei Goes Splat :( [And The Aftermath]

Work Song - Hozier

“No grave can hold my body down, I’ll crawl home to her”

I can’t say what it is exactly, but something about persistent love framed around the death motif works for me here.

Dancing After Death - Matt Maeson

“As the sun waits to eclipse and the taste teases my lips, I'm too tired to wrestle with it”

The quoted lyric reminds me of Andrei giving up and shutting down when he realizes he’s gonna die :( oh ALSO my brain always mentally fills in “and no one else” after the “you and I” that ends the chorus which does NOT help with my depression!

One Last Time - Jaymes Young

“Could I feel your skin on mine before I have to say goodbye?”

SCREAMS SO LOUDLY. The whole song is like. Someone dying and wanting to see their person one last time and AAAAAAAAAAA. I am a little incoherent maybe. “I'm leavin' this cold world of mine, no pleadin' is gonna turn back time” really Gets Me in the context of Andrei accepting his own death and withdrawing and it’s so. Anyway.

Oblivion - Bastille

“When oblivion is calling out your name, you always take it further than I ever can”

I don’t think this is exactly what the song is talking about, but the quoted lyric in the context of Andrei dying and Natasha watching him fade and withdraw...good Lord. I need emotional support.

Haunt - Bastille

“I’ll come back to haunt you/Memories will taunt you”

Natasha being haunted by the memory of Andrei!!! Help me!!!! Also “I will try to love you/It’s not like I’m above you” as a callback to Andrei’s feelings for Natasha when they start to reconnect is so mental illness inducing. OOOH and “Questioning why as you look to the sky that is cloudless up above our heads and thoughts come to mind that our short little lives haven't left the path that they will tread” any lyric ever about looking at the sky is Andrei’s now.

Without You - for KING & COUNTRY

“What do you do when you don't get better/Strong arms get too, get too weak to hold her”

:( :( :( :( :( Also “I’m not ready to live without you” I am so sad.

Good Grief - Bastille

“Every minute and every hour I miss you, I miss you, I miss you more”

Pain! Agony, even!

I made myself SO sad writing the entire last half of these annotations geez

#im so sad im so sad im so sad!#war and peace #great comet #natasha rostova #andrei bolkonksy #uhhh whats their ship name?#w&p playlists #my post #figured out how to do a read more bc this post is so LONG

14 notes · View notes

ajokeformur-ray · 5 years

Note

Some soft and kind smut with our boy Arthur... Cause I was longing for him to be treated kindly AT LEAST ONCE for the whole film :(

you’re all getting well fed today; three Joker imagines in one go! Oof - I’m not even gonna apologise to those of you who don’t like this franchise. I’m having fun and that’s what matters!

Wanna be on the taglist? lemme know!

TW; swearing, actual smut, smoking (Arthur). err… think that’s it?

Also features an actual joke we can see in the journal during one scene, so BEWARE OF SPOILERS. I’ve bolded the joke so you can see.

word count: 2,125 (every time I write a Joker imagine it gets longer).

You had been on the edge of sleep just as Arthur stood up from the bed. You had heard shuffling and then the usual sound of a cigarette being lit and then dragged from. There had been the soft sound of his padding footsteps and the door had clicked shut. He had left you. He was planning on writing some more content, then.

You got out of bed, wanting to be close to him. He only ever really used his joke book when he had serious thoughts that needed to be gotten rid of. Most people didn’t find him funny, but he had such a dark and morbid sense of humour that you couldn’t help but to laugh sometimes. When he was being sarcastic, too, he was hilarious.

Arthur was sat at the small desk in the corner of the living room, lamps dotted about the place keeping it illuminated well enough for you to see. Distantly could you hear the sounds of Penny snoring, and it made you walk slowly towards Arthur, not wanting to disturb either Fleck.

As you reached Arthur, your arms looped around his shoulders. The poor man jumped and you pressed a hasty kiss to his cheek by way of silent apology. Your eyes scanned the open page of his journal/joke book.

“Why are poor people always so confused? Because they don’t make any cents.” You murmured, making Arthur tilt his head backwards so that he could look at you, his eyes scanning your face for your reaction. You huffed in amusement. “That’s so clever!”

“You really think so?” Arthur’s voice was soft, a more than obvious tone of vulnerability lacing his words.

You grinned, nodded and squeezed your arms tighter around him, giving him a half hug. “It has a double meaning. It’s amazing!”

Arthur couldn’t say anything, he was too awestruck to do anything other than stare at you. He looked like he wanted to kiss you. Knowing Arthur, though, he wouldn’t dare to ask you if he could kiss you, even though he didn’t have to ask, and so you took it upon yourself to swoop down and claim his lips with your own.

He moaned slightly into the kiss. You smiled and Arthur pulled away from you swiftly. You stepped back, frowned, but before you could feel hurt at what you thought was a rejection, Arthur got out of his chair and stood so close that your chests were pressed together.

“Do you really find me funny?” His voice was quiet, soft, his eyes pleading.

“I wouldn’t lie to you, especially about your comedy.”

“Thank you, Y/N.”

You smiled. “I love you. I love you so much it hurts.”

“It hurts you to love me?” Arthur frowned and you instantly realised your mistake.

“No!” You almost shouted in your desperation to correct his very wrong assumption that he was so fucked up that it hurt you to love him. “What I mean is that I love you so much it’s like my heart can’t take anymore. I just… I love you.”

“You can’t find the words for it, can you?” Arthur murmured, his eyes shining with tears he was fiercely fighting back.

“No,” you hummed thoughtfully, “But I could show you. Will you let me show you how much I love you?”

Arthur’s lips were on yours before you could blink.

“Please.” He begged against your mouth, his tongue hot against yours.

“Bed. Now.”

Arthur chuckled in disbelief, but you were too busy kissing him to reply. An awkward dance ensued of tangled limbs, clothes being discarded without thought and the heat within the room, within your bodies, rising.

You fell back against the bed, taking Arthur with you. The momentum of the fall brought sobriety to yourself and Arthur, and you reached up to cup his face in your hands.

“I love you so much.”

The only sign you had that he had heard you was a slight softening in his eyes. His lips twitched and you moved your hands down to his shoulders, wrapping your arms around them to hug him to you. You squeezed him as hard you could, wanting to just pour all of your love for him into the gesture.

Arthur dropped his head down to rest in the crook of your neck, using his nose to move some of the larger strands of hair out of his way so that he could decorate your neck with kisses. Your head dropped back of it own accord, giving Arthur more space, and your arms loosened around his neck, though you didn’t release him from your hold. You knew how touch starved he was, how desperately he craved human contact and real communication.

“I never dared to think that I would find someone like you.”

“You’re my everything.” You mumbled in return, leaning up to kiss Arthur once more. The only clothing you each had on were your underclothes. Carefully did you hook your fingers into the waistband of his baggy underwear - he was still so thin despite your best efforts to feed him up a bit - and slide them down his legs. Arthur knelt upon the bed to return the favour. You had had sex together before, but this felt different, somehow. It felt like a revelation.

When at last all material barriers were shed and Arthur had quickly rolled a condom onto his length, he hovered above you, using his elbows to keep the majority of his weight off you. His frame was shaking slightly, and you frowned. Why was he keeping off you? Normally, he delighted in feeling every plane of your bodies align. You shifted your hips, parted your legs a little, and Arthur smiled; it wasn’t much, just a small quirk upwards in the corner, but it was something genuine. You had made him smile. You.

Tears came to your eyes. They didn’t spill over, but you did blink them out of the way. “Oh~,” You sighed. “I love you. I love you, I love you, I lov -”

Arthur’s lips crashed down onto your own, his hands coming up to cup your face as he finally put all of his weight on you. You could feel him lying against your inner thigh, and you shifted your hips. You were growing impatient.

“Arthur, please, just do something.”

He chuckled, the sound slightly dark, and it sent a thrill up the small of your back. Something in him was changing. By the day was he growing a little more confident, a little more dark, a little more something. You couldn’t say that you weren’t enjoying this new facet of his complex personality, but you also hoped that you would be enough to keep him on this side of the line. Even now, you couldn’t wholly save Arthur. You dashed those thoughts from your mind just as Arthur pushed his way into you. He didn’t go slowly and he didn’t give you time to adjust to him, because he knew that you appreciated that thin, almost indiscernible line between pain and pleasure.

He took his time, making sure that he kept an eye on your body language, the way your breath hitched when he angled his hips just right, the way your eyes tried to stay on his, but ultimately you had to close them, both wanting to get away from the intense feelings he was causing in you, but also wanting to surrender yourself. The loss of sight as you closed your eyes only heightened the feeling of his large hands tracing along your body, as if he was exploring new sensations, the way he was thrusting in and out of you so slowly, his every thought dedicated to you. He cared little about getting himself off, though you knew you could never allow yourself to ever neglect that part of the act. He would get you off, like the gentleman he was, and then you would attend to his needs.

Your relationship involved a lot of give and a lot of take, with both of you trying with all your might to take care of the other. He reminded you to take any medications, to eat something, to drink and to relax. You overworked yourself sometimes, and it always broke his heart a little to see you so tired that you could barely brush your teeth before literally collapsing into bed with a weary sigh. Contrastingly, many a time had you come home to see Arthur battered, bruised and bleeding, and you had had to put your own feelings aside just to patch him up. You always did so with utmost care. Your relationship was one of mutual trust, respect, adoration, care, and love. There was so much love that you both felt for the other that sometimes it was like you could drown in the waves that crashed over you.

Neither of you ever wanted to do without the other.

That thought brought you up.

“Hey, Arthur?”

“Y-yeah?” He grunted, inhaled and exhaled through his teeth. What was so important that it had to be discussed now, with your legs locked tightly around his bony waist?

“Would you marry me?”

You didn’t have a ring. Not yet. You would get one though. You would.

Arthur stopped mid thrust, buried deep inside you, his beautiful eyes widened and his mouth dropped open slightly. “W-what… What did you say? Surely I heard you wrong.”

You shook your head, squeezing him into you by clenching your legs, and brought your hands up to cup his face. “You heard me. I want to marry you. I was just thinking how much I love you and how much I never want to be without you again so… I don’t have a ring yet but we can go out looking for one tomorrow if yo -”

Lips seized yours and you felt hot tears dot your face. Arthur whimpered into the kiss and, even though he was still buried inside you, you brought him into a hug, cradling him. He started to laugh softly, the sound disbelieving but somehow also genuine, and you felt a wave of gentle heat surround you. Over and again did you manage to bring the true Arthur into light.

You pulled back from the kiss just enough to say, “So that’s a yes?”

Arthur grinned. There was a touch of hysteria to the expression. Again, that something wasn’t too far from the surface. “Make me yours, Y/N.”

Oh, you would.

It didn’t take long after that for you to achieve your end. With your walls clenching so tightly around him did Arthur find his own release, and you found yourself crying. Again. Would the thought of him ever not make you cry? You hoped not. To not cry would mean that you didn’t care so much, and so you promised yourself to always remember this moment.

“Why are you crying, sweet thing?”

“I love you.” You mumbled, embarrassed, even after all that had occurred tonight. You hoped Penny was still asleep. She slept like the dead, you knew, so there wasn’t much to worry about.

“I love you too. You’re the best thing about this awful place.”

Arthur pulled out of you, leaving you feeling empty, and discarded the condom with a slight grimace on his face. He’d be wanting to get cleaned up. Would that mean he would have to leave the bed? Tonight had been all about you showing him your love for him, and so you got up, your entire body protesting, and made your way to the bathroom to get a wet flannel. Within thirty seconds were you back with him, the flannel easily cleaning him up. You went back to the bathroom to put the dirty material in the laundry basket, and then attended to your own needs before joining Arthur again.

You slid into bed easily, and Arthur lay so close to you that your shoulders were touching. He didn’t dare to move to wrap you into his embrace, even though you were technically engaged now, so you took it upon yourself. When the time came, you knew that Arthur would do the same for you in spades.

Arthur was the best part of you, and you would never let him so much as doubt that for a second. Just as sleep was beginning to cloud your senses and you felt yourself sinking deeper into the worn mattress, you felt the softest pressure on your forehead, the weight of Arthur’s head lowering onto your stomach, and he said, “Thank you for loving me.”

In the morning, you’d be sure to show him your love. Again and again, over and over would you show Arthur Fleck how much you loved him.

Arthur Fleck/Joker: @writings-of-a-gen-z @x-avantgarde-x

Wanna be tagged? Let me know!

#x-avantgarde-x #Requests closed #requests open for joker #joker 2019 #joker #joker imagine #joker 2019 imagine #todd phillips #joaquin phoenix #phoenix!joker #phoenix!joker imagine #phoenix!joker x reader #arthur fleck #arthur fleck imagine #arthur fleck x reader #arthur fleck smut #arthur fleck smut imagine

2K notes · View notes

svmjaeyvn · 8 months

Text

love maze, s.jy.

chapter two pairing: jake x afab!reader word count: tbd (series)

masterlist

add yourself to the taglist here!

genre: college!au, mutual friends, fake dating, smut.

synopsis: an unfortunate encounter, drunken mistakes, and a sort of (definitely) stalker leads jake sim ‘dating’ his best friend’s childhood crush.

or, your life gets intertwined with a rich boy’s in attempt to not get sued by his crazy personal fangirl and like with all good cliches, sex overcomplicates things.

MDNI, 18+

tap below to continue

CHAPTER TWO: INTOXICATING

previous masterlist next

word count: 1.9k

warnings: alcohol, partying, mentions of yeonjun for funzies, jake thinking with his dick even after what just happened so sort of questionable???

a/n: bare with me i’m trying to build the plot a little bit

YOU DIDN’T KNOW how you ended up back at the frat house. Truly, the party was in full swing and after dealing with the encounter that you did, it would've made the most sense to go home and cry it all out, maybe eat some ice cream for dinner and watch a few romcoms. But that wasn't the case due to Yunjin sending you a text saying how she wouldn't be coming home for the night, the date seemingly going well and you didn't have it in you to ruin her night by telling her of yours.

Thus, uncomfortable with being left alone, you opted to go the other route and surround yourself with as many people as possible. Though, the boys hadn't wandered far, keeping you in sight at all times and Jay particularly staying by your side no matter how many times you told him to still enjoy himself knowing how much of a social butterfly he was a majority of the time. Your work uniform was disregarded in his room, changed into a spare pair of flare jeans and lacy top to fit in with the party, courtesy of the few clubbing nights you went to with him and ended up spending the night, leaving your clothes in his dirty laundry after stealing large hoodies and sweats.

All bad things could be washed away with alcohol, or so they said. Thus, you were on your fourth round of shots in the last 30 minutes with a random group who made their way in the kitchen, never one to have been a lightweight but typically better at timing your drinking. Jay was growing particularly antsy by your actions, knowing you were acting out of the need to forget but he didn't want to let you drink irresponsibly.

"Why don't you slow down a bit, yeah teeny?" Jay asks, leaned close to your ear for you to hear over the loud blaring of music. Attempting to take away the can of Twisted Tea, something you typically hated by the taste but tonight didn't seem to care, while you pull it back with a pointed look.

"I'm fine," You emphasize, words clear and steady, the alcohol not hitting you yet much to your relief. Glancing around, you make eye contact with the umpteenth girl who had been shooting daggers your way for keeping Jay occupied thus far. "If you don't go away I'm gonna end up getting jumped tonight by your fangirls," You add with a small snort.

Jay followed your gaze, turning to the girl who's face morphed from a glare into a sickenly sweet smile as she waved at him with a bite of her lip, attempting to be seductive but he merely snorts at the gesture. "Pretty sure she got chlamydia from a dude in the drama department,"

You scrunched up your nose, finding the information one you didn't need to know. "At least you know better than to fuck anyone that offers," Taking a long sip of your drink once more, the slight burn in your throat becoming easier to bare. "Alright, I'm gonna go dance. You go do anything else,"Jay shakes his head almost immediately causing you to send him a bored look. "I'm fine dude, honest. You need to stop worrying so much. Nothing actually happened,"

"You're not in the right headspace," He protests but you let out a small snort.

"Jesus, dude, you act like an overprotective brother,"

"I am!" Jay defends while you shake your head.

"We're not even related!" You shoot back but his jaw drops in offense.

"We were born a week apart, our moms have been friends since high school. We're basically twins, I know you better than yourself," He lists off, deeply concerned by the way you were disregarding your twins in another life theory that your families always joked of since you were young.

"I'm definitely not your twin, you know why?" You start, standing up from the kitchen island with a small smirk playing at your lips. Your head began to feel fuzzy, the start of your buzz coming and the tension from earlier leaving you slowly but surely. "I'm hotter," You finish, a cocky look playing at your features while Jay rolls his eyes.

"Right, and which one of us gets laid?"

"Hey!" You hiss, waggling a finger in his direction. "I don't hook up by choice. Y'all are nasty,"

"And because you're a hermit who doesn't see the light of day," He snickers causing you to narrow your eyes at him.

Decidedly having enough of the banter, you merely spin on the heels of your feet. "Bye Jay!" You call over your shoulder making your way toward the living room which was lively and loud, body's meshed together and dancing to whatever song that was blaring through the speakers that sounded through the house.

Jay let out a sigh of defeat, pulling out his phone to do a headcount of where everyone was. Thankfully, Heeseung and Jake were in the general area you were, him asking them to keep an eye on you for the time being and getting a thumbs up in response.

Heeseung was on the dance floor, a random girl he never met before tonight swaying herself pressed up against his hips. He looked lively, a few more shots in and just wanting to mess around for the time being. You spotted the tall boy momentarily in the jumble of people who nodded over to you ensuring that you were okay, a nod you returned reassuring him and he took it as enough to go back to his business.

Meanwhile, Jake was on the sidelines, leaned up against the wall as he spotted you the moment you walked over. Far too caught up with the events from earlier, he found it hard to enjoy himself, feeling partially sorry for you but also having an unpleasant pit in his stomach, not necessarily angry but he couldn't exactly pinpoint it.

He continued to sip at the cup of punch Jungwon had conducted up, only drinking it due to how excited the younger boy was of his creation but it was entirely too strong for anyone to stomach more than one cup.

His eyes continued to glance over you, taking in each of your curves that was showed off by the tightness of your jeans. They hugged your ass in the right places, emphasizing the perky shape before beginning to flare out from the knee down. The lacy black top was cropped, showing a good portion of your stomach due to the mid rise of your pants, the deep v-plunge neckline providing more to the imagination in seeing your breast that were pushed up with your bra. The shiny gleam that came off of your naval piercing catching Jake by surprise, having to do a double take to ensure he was seeing things correctly.

You were attractive, that was obvious enough. Although slightly shameful, he couldn't help but rake his eyes over you, thoughts filling his head imagining what it would be like to have you under him, staring up with that daze-y doe eyed look that would make him bend to of any of your desires.

But there was a problem with that. He wasn't the only one with eyes, able to see you and the way you swayed your body to the music, your tiny waist and full thighs that he wanted to die between if so lucky. Jake took note of the few guys who's glances began to wander toward you, even ones who had already claimed their fuck buddies for the night and danced alongside them all while drooling at you who danced by yourself.

He watched as a familiar face make his way toward you. Choi Yeonjun, cool dude to be friends with, horrible guy to date. His reputation preceded him in more ways than one, notorious for stringing girls along week by week and the worst part was they knew of his doings. It was embarrassing how they fought to be his newest toy for the day, a sort of achievement to the girls he's strung along to say they've ticked hooking up with Yeonjun off their list.

Yeah, not happening. Jake didn't know if it was due to him still feeling protective due to you unintentionally calling him for help, or rather the more sinful thoughts that passed through his head moments ago and not wanting to sit and watch you to become a new trophy to a guy like Choi Yeonjun.

Picking himself up from where he was leaned back, Jake took a large swig of his now lukewarm concoction of liquors. Weaving his way through the crowd, he pushes his way to you just as Yeonjun stops in front of your view.

Wrapping an arm around your shoulders, Jake leans close to your ear. "Go along with it," He whispers, catching you by surprise as you were previously engrossed by the music in your own little world, unaware that two of the most lusted over guys at the party were having a silent debate over you at the moment.

Feeling the alcohol now coursing through your bloodstream, you obliged by Jake's words. Continuing on without a word of protest, though you did take the red solo cup from his hand and took a sip from it as you adapted to dancing with him now. Scrunching up your nose upon the drink hitting your tongue, you look at Jake with an incredulous look of disgust in his beverage choices causing him to laugh.

"Jungwon made it," He explains with a small shrug, leaning dangerously close to your face as his breath lightly fanned against your lips. Peering over your shoulder, a small smirk plays at his features seeing as Yeonjun had disappeared from your sight, decidedly giving up on any sort of chance he was attempting to have with you for the night.

"It sucks," You respond back and yet still take another sip, this time longer as you quickly swallow it without time for it to settle on your tongue. Jake's smile turns into one of amusement, watching as you handled the alcohol as if it were nothing before you placed the cup back in his hold. "You either dance with me or go away, your pissing contest with that dude is over now,"

Jake raised a brow. "Pissing contest?"

"You know, marking territory that's not yours," You shoot back, a bored look sent to him as he sheepishly shrugs. "I don't need you being protective like Jay. For one, we barely know each other and two, I'm not that much of an idiot to hook up with Choi Yeonjun no matter how badly I need to get laid. So you either shut up and dance with me or you go away,"

Already rather blunt as it was, the second you got alcohol in your system you tended to be more unfiltered than necessary. Jake finds amusement in your confession but your eyes seem so certain. Though the slight gleam in them as you looked up caused his stomach to do a flip, one that caused him to not think clearly.

Jake didn't respond, instead his arm slips down from your shoulders down to your waist, snaking around and encasing your body against his own. A small smile perks at your lips, sighing blissfully at his lack of commentary and rather allowing you to do as pleased.

"Good choice," You mumble out, breath fanning against his neck as your arms lazily drape from his neck, brining your bodies dangerously close to one another though neither of you minded.

After all, having a little fun with a hot guy never hurt anyone, right?

#enhypen jake #jaeyun x reader #jaeyun smut #jake sim #enhypen #sim jaeyun

111 notes · View notes

msuhana · 4 years

Text

heeyoo everyone ! i’m ume ( 21+, she/her, pst! ) and this is my first muse here ! i’ve been eyeing this place for a while but only got enough time recently to really be able to join so i’m supes excited to be here !!! anyway enough with the ice-breaker-esque intro, this is hana 🖤 ( yves fc ) and she’s quite the pain in the ass bc she has quite the longest stick in her ass lmfao! her profile is right here, but it’s ridiculously long ( not that this isn’t ridiculously long but wtv ) so if you don’t want to get a headache .... mb read the below deets first ? i’d reaaaaaaaally love to plot with everyone, i’d much prefer it over twitter (@nagisasgf) or via discord ( feel free to ask! ) rather than tumblr dms, if possible. but if you’d also like to plot, feel free to like this and i’ll zoom by for some one on one time ! 🤪🤪🤪

TW WARNINGS CHILD ABUSE, VIOLENCE, BLOOD, NSFW

meet cho hana

again, cho hana: 21 y/o ( 11/11/98 ), toseong senior majoring in transfiguration, minor in herbology

she’s also in these clubs: chess club (co-president), debate club, and herbology club!

her mother chose her clubs and her major, hana chose her minor and the herbology club

born and raised in seoul, south korea! she’s also a mahoutokoro graduate

she was a ‘accident’, her father is severely out of the picture to the point that hana doesn’t even know his name / whereabouts or questions about him because her mother never told her about him at all and hana just accepted it ( aka her mother has a very tight reign on hana’s life )

speaking of her mother, her mother is a famed auror who fell from grace when she got pregnant with hana

because of her pregnancy with hana, she had to retire early and thus dedicated her entire life making sure hana didn’t make the same mistakes she did and was just as smart, talented and envied as ahyoung had been

this makes for a very restrained childhood, where all hana knew was studying, studying and more studying

also if it isn’t obvious, hana has serious mommy issues to the point that she’s disillusioned herself into thinking everything is okay when it’s not

( TW FOR CHILD ABUSE )

whenever her mother was displeased with something, she’d physically abuse hana -- it began when hana would get things wrong, if she didn’t get the right grades or failed to make the top of her class but then it started to extend to embarrassing her mother by saying or doing the wrong things

( END TW )

it’s pretty bad because hana thinks, still, if she works hard enough she can somehow gain her mother’s love

ever since she was young, hana was conditioned to strive for the best, because she was ‘cho ahyoung’s daughter’ she could do it, to the point that it not only inflated hana’s ego, it also really fucked up her self-esteem and how she she’s her own self-worth

a lot of people think she’s a ‘genius’ or ‘prodigy’ because of her academic history but she’s literally the opposite, she works way too hard for her grades but her mother wants her to pretend she’s a genius because she thinks it’s embarrassing that her own daughter isn’t a natural-born genius like she is

i, hana

this bitch has Big Tsun vibes if you know it you know it 🤪

like she’ll geniunely care but she’s also HEAVES BIG SIGH BC ???? WHY ??? WHAT ARE THESE FEELINGS ???

she’s such a priss, and she knows it -- that’s why i say she has a stick up her ass bc she does

she’s definitely not a wild card, she’s very by the book, rules and all, sure -- she tries not to fault people if they’re not the same as her but if you go out of your way to be stupid, you’ll be getting an ear-full

probably the most put-together person you know, organized, meticulous, looks like she has her life all together? yeah that’s cho hana

her outfits of choice are hot librarian chic, if you must know -- yes, she owns sweater vests and layers her clothes, and yes she thinks they’re sexy

she’s not mean, but she’s also not unreasonably nice off the gate ???? she’s just really civil and mutual ??? mostly she’ll fake smile at you but in her head she’s like ‘i’m with stupid’

no, but if you’re really dumb / do something really dumb she’ll call you out on it without filter

she’s a very type-A personality, but she wasn’t always like this. if anything, she was made to be this way and it kind of stuck. she carries around a planner ( no, not those bullet journal crap ) an actual planner with real dates, a to-do list and scheduled sessions written for almost every minute of every day. if she loses this, she’ll practically shut down

hana doesn’t love control, she needs it -- if anything, without it, she can get a little antsy, so much that it kind of fucks with her fragile ego ( you can thank her mother for the need to be in control bc her mother literally controls every aspect of her life )

if she’s upset, she’ll probably grin through it before quickly excusing herself to go throw vases at the walls or tear flowers to shreds in the greenhouse

if you need someone to critically tear down your confidence and dish reality’s terrible news to you, hana’s probably the person you need

you can probably find hana in 3 places if she’s not in her dorm: studying in the library, crying in the greenhouse, or smoking at the pool of universe

she’s praised as some kind of genius or prodigy, but hana thinks it’s more of an insult than a compliment because she's neither. she won’t deny it but you can probably instantly see the way her demeanor changes towards you when you call her either of those things

this bitch should go on jeopardy with all the useless information she keeps on hand from all her studying, tbh. like she’d be leading a normal conversation with her friends, and if it’s remotely related, she’d randomly insert it into the conversation as if it was something normal like asking about the weather.

not one to go out looking for trouble, but much like a vulture – she follows it. perhaps it’s her desire to be praised, to feel needed, whatever – but in her group of friends, could probably be seen as the moral compass, if not, the person who’s cleaning up everyone’s messes ( or holding their hair while they puke their guts out )

needed connects

childhood friends who know how hana’s mom is, and all the stress she puts on her ( but not the bad things that happen at home ) and try to help her through her issues but hana’s like ‘no, it’s not your problem, it’s okay’ but this friend won’t give up because they hate to see hana so stressed and sad and frustrated and just want the best for her!!!!

give her friends who want to loosen her up because she’s literally so fuCKING RIGID, she needs to live a little but hana is literally like fuck that shit i need to study my ass off or else i’ll lose my place ( but really she’d probably not lose her place, she’s just delusional )

ppl she can actually break down in front of bc she feels stress keeping up w everyone’s expectations of who she is and she’s kind of SIck of pretending to be this Perfect Person but she keeps it up bc it’s better than hearing the nasty things about her

give me a good tension-filled rivals plot, this bitch is honestly so hyper-competitive it’s ridiculous, we’d just love someone to go ‘chill tf out you bitch, but oh yeah look how i steal rank 1 from you’

TOSEONG SENIOR PREFECT LOCKED ! so, hana worked extra hard junior year in order to get senior prefect ( or even head girl ) but since she got neither, hana is a) pissed and b) bitter because now she has her mother breathing down her neck for not getting either positions, but her mother’s wrath adds even more : ) unnecessary : ) stress and that stress : ) gets unreasonably taken out on that toseong senior prefect

exes who couldn’t keep up with her -- hana always puts her relationships second to her academic priorities and it comes to a point where she’ll put studying/getting ahead before hanging out with her significant other, and it has always been this way ; she’s also just never able to properly put her feelings into proper words so she’s always just ... Repressed

someone give her a love where she ALMOST threw everything away for but at the last minute didn’t -- OR BETTER YET she was so ready to do it but the s/o was like Sike! and she was left devastated and her already vulnerable feelings got even worse to the point that she closed herself off

HERBOLOGY CLUB MEMBER LOCKED ! ( could be a junior year or above! ) hana wasn’t always in the herbology club, but she joined her sophomore year after a brush of fate. after getting really bad results on her DADA exam, and fearing what her mother would say/do, she finds solace in the greenhouse ( she’s been there several times bc of her minor and finds it empty at certain hours ) and begins ripping up the plants. your muse can find hana and scold her / console her / etc. but somehow the interaction ends with your muse convincing hana to join the herbology club

( TW NSFW )

someone pls fuck her against a bookcase, just a thought

rivals but fwb ( can also be paired with the connect from above! )

( END TW )

hana secretly smokes. she doesn’t fault anyone who does, hana just thinks it’s a bad habit for herself and if her mother knew, she knew she’d never hear the end of it. so, enter your muse either they found her while they themselves were looking for a smoke or just happened upon her -- either way they found out hana smokes and it can end in either a ) hana doesn’t give a shit and ends up having smoking dates with them or b ) hana fucking fears for her life and exchanges something in order for you to keep your mouth shut

( TW ABUSE, VIOLENCE )

PRE-ESTABLISHED FRIENDS PLOT REQ ! but your muse mistakenly walks in on hana and her mother in the middle of a heated argument. you finally see hana being the submissive person you Don’t know her to be and in the nick of time you see her mother slap the shit out of her. you try to talk to hana but don’t know what to say -- shockingly enough -- you don’t need to say anything because hana just breaks down and it kind of just makes sense. from there, your muse will probably be the only person hana goes to about her mommy issues, especially when hana’s mom makes her ‘surprise’ visits to campus to check up on her

( END TW )

hana isn’t a bad drinker, if anything -- she’s pretty good at keeping her alcohol in check. however, you aren’t -- so here she is, holding your hair, holding your arm, or helping you back to your dorm room. either way, she’s here to take care of you and in the morning, lecture you for your almost alcohol intoxication scare

as top of her class, hana isn’t unfamiliar to tutoring others, if anything, a lot of her professors actually ask her to do so -- pairing her with several of their students at one time. maybe you’re one of the students she tutors?

someone who envies how well hana does in school, and is constantly praised for it -- maybe hates her for it? idk -- something spicy i guess or going so far to say how easily it comes to hana and kind of undermines the hard work hana actually does and hana either takes it or blows up at them for it bc that shit is annoying as fuck

toseong house cute plots bc hana isn’t really all that cute but like she tries ... she wants affection but won’t go out of her way to ask for it??? bitch has problems i swear

toseong house not so cute plots ( could also be relevant to any not from toseong ) who are just sick of hana’s genius bullcrap and want to take her down a notch !!!!! my ass heavily wanting this bc who doesn’t love a muse in pain / agony ; could also apply as a rivals / hate plot idk

( TW BLOOD )

HEALING MAJORS LOCKED ! your muse catches hana in the middle of her rage episodes. she unceremoniously is wreaking havoc somewhere and ends up breaking glass to the point that she ends up bleeding. your muse chances upon her -- sees that she’s bleeding and offers to patch her up. whether or not she fesses up to why she ended up this way, can be determined!

( END TW )

#msu:intro #honestly if you read all this u deserve everything Good in the world #also known as ume doesnt know when to stfuuuuuuuuu !!!!11!!1!!!#also yes i stole parts of her profile and stuck it here y not #ill have another post for halloween plots when i stop spamming the event blog bc my ass doesnt read directions carefully #tws are there just in case none of it is explained graphically but just in case ykno!!

8 notes · View notes

shiberwrites · 5 years

Text

trust • choi san

dt: obsessan on twt ! 🥰

headcanons: angst/fluff + friends to lovers + "why do i hurt all over"

warning: not proof read! sorry for mistakes <3

san had been friends with you for the longest time. well, 5 years still counts as 'long'. he had been your desk mate for 5 years straight, hence your blooming relationship. both of you are like two peas in a pod, inseparable. everyone thought you're in a relationship with the other, but you always denied it. you? him? dating? the thought did cross your mind, you won't lie. but you weren't sure if the feeling were mutual. until.. you found out.

"hey sannie, do you have a prom date?" you asked him, taking a big bite of your burger that you pestered him to buy. "yep." a smile lifted on the corner of his lips, stealing fries from your plate until you swatted his hand away.

oh? he's occupied finally. "so who's the lucky girl eh?" you lightly kicked his leg underneath the table, cocking a teasing eyebrow at him, making him flustered. san brought his hand to his nape and rubbed it shyly while looking at you through his bangs. "promise you won't get mad?" you shot him a weirded out look.

"why would i get mad you dummy?" you chuckled, snagging the fries from his hand. he bite back his lower lip and the atmosphere became serious. "well.. it's your ex bestfriend.. dami." that's when you paused.

pause

"d-dami? why would go with her?" your voice cracked and san's face dropped in an instant. "i told you she's a deceiver. she lied to me, choi san! she did so many things to me-" you felt your anger built up in your chest that you couldn't finish your sentence anymore. "don't you remember what she did to me? i told you a lot of times!" san pursed his lips, expecting this outcome.

"people can change, y/n, she's changed. look, she even said she's sorry right?" your hunger dissipated due to your rage, and you couldn't bring yourself to look at him in the eyes. "even if she said sorry doesn't mean i forgave her for what she did. she made me lose my trust in people. she caused havoc in my life.." you clenched your fists, and slung your bag on your shoulder.

"y/n, wait!" san caught up with you before you could leave the crummy restaurant. "listen to me first," thank goodness the restaurant was quiet. it's 3am, of course no one except the both of you would be there.

"i'm sorry it happened to you, okay?" san whispered, taking your hand in his but you pulled away, refusing to initiate any skinship with him. "it's just a prom thing, i wouldn't get attached to her i promise." you scoffed, darting your eyes away from san.

"don't make promises you can't keep, san. you'll lose a friend if you do," you took your leave, and san didn't bother to chase you like he did again. you hoped he would catch up to you, drag your arm and pull you in a tight embrace. you hoped that he would whisper sweet nothings, and took back what he said.

"why do i hurt all over," you felt your heart clench. jealousy and betrayal washed over you and your trust issues acted up again. you were slowly closing your heart from other people. including san, your own best friend. it was a painful loop, a curse started by dami, your ex so-called bestfriend.

you hoped that he would understand you more. how you felt towards him, deep down.

but alas both of you are nothing but friends.

your prom date was decided last minute, and it was a random boy from other class. you're sure they weren't as interested too but both of you gotta have prom dates to actually be involved with prom. you made a beeline to the refreshments area, taking a fruit punch in your cup.

ever since that day, you and san haven't talked to each other. it's was too awkward to even take your pen off his desk when it rolled over. mostly, it was you who made it awkward. san did so many advancements and tried to apologise but you avoided quickly like it's a death trap.

you sat at the bleachers, holding a cup in hand and your phone in another. you weren't too dressed up since you don't have anyone to impress.. it was boring. your prom date probably fled away to somewhere unknown or just went home early. and you were sitting there, scanning everyone in the crowd like a sore loser.

you caught a familiar figure approaching you. his fluffy raven hair could be noticed anywhere, and also the way he talks. oh, also the way he smiles. and,

"y/n, let's go."

"huh? what-"

"i said let's go," he took you by the hand and ran out of the school gym, and you said no further questions although you were awfully curious. did something happened?

he finally stopped at some random pathway, and he huffed tiredly from all the jog. "so something happened.." he finally gained his breath and sighed loudly. "should've listened to you earlier. i'm so sorry," he racked his hair, running his fingers through his gelled hair. "she's a bitch," you snickered but quickly coughed to cover up. you maintained a straight face and crossed your arms. "well?"

"to be honest, i was curious of what person she was like when you told all the bad things about her. i was curious of what she did to you, and i tried to understand you more." san confessed, although it was kinda awkward to say in the middle of an empty pathway with a flickering streetlamp. "sorry for saying stupid things and assumed too fast," he fiddled with his necktie.

"but i'm still mad that she lied about everything, she even copied you off completely! i mean you should be mad at me for not listening to you but heck, she really did lied about everything about herself." san winced when you punched him in the arm. "ow??"

"that's for ditching me on prom for that stupid person!" you sighed in disbelief and he just chuckled. "who said i ditched you? the prom isn't over yet." san held you waist and pulled you towards him. "what are you doing!" your face flushed beetroot red, and he just smirked cockily. "we can always dance our way home," san joked and twirled you over. you scoffed, but laughed a bit. "god you're such a dork,"

"hey i know it's not a good time to ask,"

"what," you looked at san, both of you were walking in a comfortable distance. he offered to walk you home since it's dark for a lady to walk alone. "i.. like you. actually," ironically, like in the movies, both of you stopped in front of your house. "i was afraid that you'd lost feelings for me when you ghosted me like last time."

"who said i like you?" you snickered and his face fell again. "w-well if you don't like me that's fine cause-" you laughed at his disappointed face, and found it fun to tease him around.

"calm down sannie. i like you too okay? i've always liked you.. actually" his eyes shot wide and he held your hands tightly. "so. will you go out with me?" he was like a puppy, anticipating answers from you with twinkling eyes.

"only if you stay over and star gaze with me tonight," you laughed, unlocking your door and making sure you won't wake the whole family up.

san smiled and nodded, racing with you to the top of the roof.

perhaps that's where the obstacle in your friendship ended and another bond of trust was unfolded on that very day.

#choi san #san #ateez #shiberwrites #seonghwa #hongjoong #yeosang #yunho #mingi #wooyoung #jongho #san x reader #ateez fluff #ateez oneshot #ateez drabbles #ateez imagines #ateez angst #ateez gif #ateez smut

55 notes · View notes

verannaca · 5 years

Text

Some Things Change

Hello

here’s an angsty emotional kristanna drabble

i wrote this in the shower on my phone so it’s probably lazy??? idk

(this does contain/reflect major Frozen 2 spoilers, so please beware)

He didn't understand what could have possibly possessed her to run onto that dam. It was an accident. It had to be. Mattias had almost grabbed her hand. Almost. But almost didn't count. It didn't matter that their fingers touched. It didn't matter that she was petrified. Seemingly alone in the world, Kristoff is left to ask himself: "what now?"

***Fic contains emotional trauma, mention of panic attacks, mention of sex, & mentions of death, loss, and grief.

XXXXX

When we ask for change, it doesn't happen. When we're desperate for something new, it doesn't come. Change comes when we least expect it. When we need it the least. When we're at our worst. And it's never a good change, is it? It's always something we're not prepared for. Something we'd never expect. Something that was never meant to happen.

Isn't that true?

It had to be true. There couldn't be an alternative. If there was, things would be different. Life would be good. The world wouldn't be empty; meaningless.

The future was calling. It was so loud; it was certain to come. Things were looking up. Everything was perfect.

And then...

Well, then things were the opposite of perfect. Suddenly, there was no future. Suddenly, without warning, nothing mattered anymore.

He didn't understand. None of it made sense. Her actions. Her expressions. Her behaviour. It was so not her. She was reckless. Dangerous. Moving faster than usual. Everything happened too quickly. She was right there. And then she was gone.

He didn't understand what could have possibly possessed her to run onto that dam. It was obvious that her plan was working; it was going to fall. Could she have possibly intended on falling with it?

No. Of course not. She was stronger than that. Whatever she'd face—whatever she'd endured that made her behave so recklessly—nothing was strong enough to take her down for good.

It was a mistake. An accident. It had to be.

Mattias had almost grabbed her hand. Almost. But almost didn't count. It didn't matter that their fingers touched. It didn't matter that she was close enough to him that he could hear the panic in her breathing. It didn't matter that she was petrified. It didn't matter.

The stone broke beneath them. She didn't jump far enough. He didn't grab her.

Kristoff had run to the edge to help; he'd almost grabbed her, too. But he didn't. He couldn't. Instead, they were doomed to watch helplessly as she fell. She didn't fall far before the water swept her away.

The world went dark then.

They watched the waves go on. They knew it was over. All was lost.

Hours had passed before Mattias convinced Kristoff to return with them. He'd forgotten about the initial mission. The forest. Did it matter now? Did anything matter now?

It was on the quiet journey back that things began to make sense. Mattias had relayed the initial message.

"My sister gave her life for the truth."

She was gone. They were gone. How could that happen? How could they be gone? They were just there.

Anna knew. That's why she was reckless. She was grieving. Again. She'd lost everything. Again. But she kept going. Because that's what she does. That's what she always does. The next right thing.

But what was right about this?

It was an accident. He couldn't stay mad. He wasn't mad at her. Even though, now he had nothing. Everything fell when she did.

She didn't want to fall. She was scared. She scared herself. She became aware of her actions. She tried to save herself. But it was too late.

He paid no attention to the people of the forest. He didn't know what came next, though it didn't truly matter. There was no home to return to. Nothing left of hers to hold on to. Just a ring—a ring that she never saw.

He'd made his way to another cliff-side, looking out over the open sea. He had wondered if they'd ever find her, but he quickly shook away such thoughts.

He kept thinking about the time they'd met. They weren't particularly nostalgic people, but they loved to reflect on and appreciate their relationship. They'd always had a giggled over their first exchange; they'd assumed most couples had a romantic first meeting, with quotable first words, but they didn't.

"Carrots."

"Huh? Oh! Excuse me."

It made him smile. He remembered the first time they'd truly talked; she was demanding and authoritative, but it was as if she was unsure of her own ability to have authority. She wanted to be demanding, but she also had to be polite. It was in her genes. Their journey up the mountain became more memorable as they'd spent more time together. They'd been alone in the woods for days before he had to return her to her kingdom and leave her behind. Then, on that same day, as he'd realised just how much she truly meant to him—she was gone. He never thought that would be the first time. That was supposed to be the only time.

Yet here he was again; except she wasn't there to stare at. She wasn't there to watch and mourn. There was nothing left of her.

No family. No belongings. No bedroom. No home. Nothing. Just a memory; one that would soon become distant.

They lived together for three years. He remembered the first time she suggested he move in. He declined politely; living in a castle just wasn't quite for him. But he began to miss her during those long nights. Their connection developed faster than they originally wanted it to. They'd agreed to take things slow. She was battling her own insecurities, and her own self-distrust, and he was understanding of that. Plus, in the beginning, she needed time to reconnect with Elsa.

It was good that they stayed apart. It helped them focus on creating a base. They wanted to, above all else, be friends. Best friends. It was easy. And also, incredibly difficult. They wanted each other. Badly. Their anxieties began to falter as they began to realise that their feelings were real. They weren't just new and hormonal. They were falling head-over-heels for each other.

He remembered the first time they'd made love. It was significant to him; not because of the sex, but because of the connection. They'd been nervous at first; right before it started, they'd stopped to mutually check in with each other. They agreed to be real. It was awkward. Gods, was it awkward. But that made them laugh at and with each other. They kept talking; asking questions, talking too fast—anything to be present. Anything to make the other person happy. Of course, there was plenty of romance. Many moments of silence. Moments when all that could be heard was breathing and moaning. They'd stayed in private for a while; after they'd finished, they talked about their near future. They were both desperate for confirmation that this was going to last. Anna had an irrational fear of being used- she'd quickly apologised for suggesting such a thing, but Kristoff was understanding. He was afraid that she'd find a real prince and move on unbothered. He had no idea how he came to deserve her. But he was beginning to learn: it isn't about deserve.

Oh, what he'd do to hold her again. To wrap his arms around her petite body, and hold her head close to his chest. How badly he wanted to run his hands through her thick, auburn hair. He could stare into her aqua eyes for an eternity.

But he'd never get to again.

And the two closest things to Anna, were gone.

Now what?

He opened his eyes for a moment. He needed to check in with reality; he knew he couldn't live in memories. He saw something coming across the water, moving at a high rate of speed.

Elsa.

A small mercy.

He'd quickly made his way down the rocks, standing on the beach to wait for her. She arrived quickly; sliding off the Nokk, and moved swiftly towards him. She smiled; "Where's Anna? I have something to tell her."

But her smile faded as she saw the silent tears. Her heart began to beat at an unnatural pace. She'd known Kristoff for nearly just as long as Anna had, though of course not as well. She knew how to read him, and these were not tears of joy or relief.

No. Elsa was a reminder of what was lost. He'd never noticed before just how similar they looked. The big, round eyes, the button nose, the light dusting of freckles that covered her nose and cheeks—they weren't identical to Anna, but at that time, in that moment; all he could see was her.

"Anna?" Elsa had prompted, voice beginning to shake.

The world came rushing back to him. His heart broke all over again as he realised that he'd now have to tell Elsa that her sister was gone again. And this time, love couldn't save her. He tried to find the words, but couldn't. What was he to say?

He didn't have to say anything. Elsa knew instantly. Her legs trembled beneath her, and just as she began to fall, Kristoff scooped her into a tight embrace. They wrapped their arms around each other, and sobbed.

This was the end. It was the end of everything they'd known; everything they'd fought for. Much of their own relationship was founded by their mutual love for Anna.

It wasn't supposed to go this way. She wasn't supposed to be the one to die. Not again. That's not fair. She's too good for this world. Too powerful. Too strong. Surely, she was okay.

Elsa let out a scream she didn't know she was holding in. It echoed against the rocks, bouncing off the water. Kristoff held her tighter, forcing the air out of her lungs. She wheezed under the pressure, but fell limp. Her eyes opened halfway and stared blankly at the rocks.

Kristoff kept his eyes shut tight. He had a handful of Elsa's loose hair; the other hand firmly grasping around her ribcage. Surely, he was hurting her; pulling against her head, and stabbing her side with his fingers. Neither of them seemed to notice. It didn't matter. She was alive after all.

She was alive after all.

Did Anna die for nothing? Her behaviour, her grief—was it all for nothing? Was she simply mistaken?

It was his turn to break down—he wasn't really the “emotional kind” around anyone other than Anna, but this was simply too much. This pain was too much.

Then, a voice broke into their world. Mattias was calling to them.

It took every ounce of his energy to release Elsa and turn around; she fell limp, head falling hard as his shoulder moved out from under her chin. She barely caught herself. Kristoff looked up, holding up a hand to shield his eyes from the sun.

Mattias was gesturing for them to come back up. "It's the Princess!"

That's not fair. Kristoff looked at Elsa, who was sitting silently, shaking. Her head was hung low; tears stained her cheeks.

He'd figured he was dreaming. Maybe he'd dosed off while holding her. Mattias wouldn't play games like that. It was a trick.

And then they heard it.

That delicate, but loud voice. It echoed from above them as it called his name. "KRISTOFF!"

Kristoff would've ignored it if it weren't for the fact that Elsa's head shot up.

That's not possible.

Then, he remembered the spirits. It occurred to him in that moment that maybe—just maybe—the spirits saved Anna.

Before he could truly come to his senses, Elsa was already running. He watched her go for a moment before his brain was able to catch up; then he fell to his feet and sprinted to follow.

Elsa climbed up those rocks faster than she'd ever moved before. She knew Kristoff was right behind her. They got to the surface and helped each other to their feet; their hands found each other and held on tight, as their eyes searched the area.

Then he saw her. She was a distance away, but he knew. He just knew. He practically screamed her name as he bolted towards her. She spun around and did the same as she began to run in his direction.

Elsa stayed still for a moment, breathing heavily. She was disoriented. This wasn't how she thought they'd be reunited. But that didn't matter. Anna is alive. Elsa quickly ran after them.

Kristoff and Anna collided with such force, they spun and fell to the ground. Their arms found their way around each other as they cried.

"I didn't mean it; I didn't mean it!" "I know—I know, Anna!" "I'm so sorry—I just needed to do what was right, and—" "It's okay; everything's okay now."

They pulled out of their embrace, just enough to look each other in the eye. Anna didn't hesitate to kiss him; it was more passionate than it would've been if they'd known Elsa had been watching.

Anna apologised again and again, but Kristoff only told her it was okay as he ran his hands over her drenched hair, soon cupping her face in his hands. She was cold to the touch—he couldn't tell if she was shivering from the cold, or her adrenaline.

"Anna, Anna—" he interrupted her fast-paced words with a gentle but urgent tone. "Turn around."

She sniffled, taking a few shaky breaths as her brain processed his words. "What?"

"Turn around," he said, voice and expression now calm and relieved.

She slowly looked over her shoulder, then spun and fell as she saw her sister standing a few feet behind her. She stared for a moment, and Elsa crouched down, resting her knees on the grass. She leaned towards her sister with wide, teary eyes; "Anna? Y-you're okay?"

Anna wanted to scream in that moment, but she refrained from doing so. Instead, she let out a sob-filled laugh and crawled towards her sister. They pulled themselves into each other's arms, hugged each other tighter than ever, and sobbed together.

"I thought I'd lost you!" "Lost me?! You saved me! Again." "But you were gone! Olaf melted, and—" "I had to go deep to find the answers; I'm so sorry I scared you—the spirits returned their gift once you did what was right!"

Anna pulled out if the embrace to look her sister in the face. "Do you have any idea what you did to me?! The pain! The last time we saw each other, we were fighting! I was so angry, Elsa! And you left me!"

Kristoff grabbed Anna's arms from behind. It was a calming embrace. It let her know she wasn't alone anymore. She was okay. She relaxed a bit under his touch.

"I know, I know," Elsa quickly defended. She held on tight to her sister, keeping a hold on one hand, and keeping her other hand on Anna's cheek. "I should've handled things differently; I just got so caught up—I didn't realise at the time." She choked, coughing as she tried to calm down. Her breath hitched and she felt a panic-attack coming on. "I just wanted to protect you."

"What am I supposed to do without you?"

Anna's voice was so soft and broken that it physically hurt both Elsa and Kristoff. They exchanged a look, then realised Anna was talking to both of them. She leaned back, falling into Kristoff's embrace, and as she fell, she pulled Elsa in close to her chest. "I need you." Her voice was barely a whisper.

Kristoff pulled her closer, putting a hand on Elsa, too. He tried to stay silent, but couldn't. His frustration was returning. He put his hand under Anna's chin and forced her to look up at him; "what are we supposed to do without you? Huh? I watched you fall, Anna! I thought you were dead!"

Anna began to cry again. She nodded in understanding, then a wave of guilt rushed through her. She made Kristoff feel the same way Elsa had made her feel. She sat up, forcing Elsa to do the same. Then she turned to her boyfriend, and gave him a proper hug. He returned it, grateful.

Elsa was able to relax, although her own guilt was beginning to consume her. Had she been selfish? Did she really make Anna suffer? Again?

When they pulled out of the hug, they kissed one last time. "I'm sorry I left you behind," Anna said softly, keeping a gentle hand on his cheek. He could see the sadness in her eyes. This grief wasn't over yet—Elsa returning didn't end her suffering. "I was just so desperate to protect her."

"Hey, hey, it's okay," he said, words quick but voice soft. He gently ran his thumbs under her eyes to rid her cheeks of the tears. He offered the gentlest smile, and told her; "my love is not fragile."

Elsa gently put her hand on Anna's shoulder, getting the couple's attention. Anna sniffled again before she asked; "did you find what you were looking for?"

Elsa smiled warmly, but it had a tension to it. She took a deep breath and said, "yes. But it was right in front of me the entire time."

The redhead returned a similar smile and sighed. Was it relief? Or frustration? "And the fifth spirit?"

"Well..."

"Oh." It all made sense. "You are the fifth spirit. You're the bridge."

Elsa took Anna's hands, "yes, but the thing is... a bridge has two sides. And mother had two daughters."

Anna smiled for real this time.

"We did this together," Elsa reminded.

They remained in silence for a moment. Kristoff kept Anna close, partially in attempt to warm her up.

"Anna, I have to ask you a question."

The redhead tilted her head to the side; "yes?"

Elsa's voice was warm; "do you wanna build a snowman?"

"What?" She was dumbfounded.

But Elsa stood, and she and Kristoff helped Anna to her feet. Then, Elsa closed her eyes and made a wish. It took a few beats, but eventually the flurries met them, and began to form a familiar figure on the ground nearby. Anna grabbed at the strap of her satchel— she'd tried desperately to hold onto it as she crashed through the frigid water. Thankfully, none of its contents were lost.

As the snow took its shape, Anna hurried over and began to put the pieces back together. And soon, their frozen friend returned.

Anna didn't hesitate to hug him close. Kristoff and Elsa soon joined.

This. Exactly this. This is okay.

But even despite this joy—this relief. This miracle. Elsa and Anna were beginning to wonder the same thing that Kristoff just couldn't get past.

What now?

107 notes · View notes

donteattheappleshook · 5 years

Text

Of Cars and Bars Chapter 6/13

After literally more than a year and a half, here is chapter 6. In a miraculous turn of events though, Chapter 7 is already written and will be posted next week. Chapter 8 is half done and will be posted the week after that. I promise I have not abandoned this fic.

As always, thank you @kmomof4 for fixing my terrible grammar and being so supportive of this fic <3

Summary:

When Emma Swan is offered the chance to go on tour as an opener for one of the most popular up and coming bands of the decade, the last thing she expects is to find that the lead guitarist is the stranger she had a one night stand with five years ago.

This started out as a smutty two shot about Emma Ruby and Mary Margaret going on a road trip and has evolved into a slow-burn mutual pining angst-fest.

Read it from the beginning on Ao3 and Ffn because tumblr eats all my italics.

Chapter 6 - Roll Away Your Stone

You told me that I would find a home / Within the fragile substance of my soul / And I have filled this void with things unreal / And all the while my character it steals

The first show had gone great, really great actually, better than she’d expected. She’d been so nervous. It had been so long since she’d been up on stage - a real stage, not just open mic night at a bar or a club but a real honest to god show where she got to sing more than one song, where the audience was there for her… well okay, technically they’d been there for Abandon Ship!, but she really felt like she’d won them over in the end. At least that’s the feeling she got from the standing ovation they’d given her.

And to play with Mary Margaret and Ruby, god she’d missed that. When Ruby had told Liam a few weeks ago that they were her band she hadn’t exactly been lying. They were her band, it had just been a very, very long time since they actually backed her up. More than anything, it had been a way for her friends to guarantee that she wouldn’t have to go on this tour alone. But the last time they’d played together they had been teenagers, Emma had just barely gotten her driver’s license; Ruby had braces. She’d missed it. She hadn’t realised how much she’d missed that part of their friendship, how much it had meant to her - before he showed up and ripped it all away.

She’d honestly been really impressed with how quickly her friends had learned her new songs. She had a sneaking suspicion that they may have been secretly watching her little late night skeevy bar shows more often than they’d admitted to. There had been very little discussion about it really though, the songs that is. They couldn’t play most of her old songs for reasons that Emma didn’t like to think about. And well the other ones, the ones she wrote after everything happened, she couldn’t play those. Those hurt worse. And so, they were left with her new songs - well, newer. She hadn’t written much in the last couple of years. Work, life had gotten in the way. It was hard to come home at 5am after a stakeout and find the motivation to sit and write when her bed seemed like such a better option.

It was fun, really fun, to play with her friends, to have people enjoy her music, to see them dance and try to sing along to songs they hadn’t heard before and she got to share that with the most important people in her life.

Tonight was a good night. She was glad that they’d had this show. She’d been worried at first about having to perform only a few hours after they touched ground in LA but Belle knew what she was doing. She’d booked them a performance in some bar that was so non-mainstream that it had become incredibly mainstream but hadn’t put the word out until an hour before the show with a post to the band’s social media accounts. Within thirty minutes they were turning people away at the door. Nothing drew a crowd like exclusivity.

Despite the raging fans, she was happy the show had been in a small venue. It was almost like a dress rehearsal, a trial run to a show tomorrow that would change her life forever. They were playing the Hollywood Bowl, the fucking Hollywood Bowl, the seventeen-thousand-five-hundred seat Hollywood Bowl. The show was sold out.

Emma’s hands clammed up just thinking about it. She hadn’t realised when she’d agreed to go on tour with Abandon Ship! just how big they were. Yes, she knew a few of their songs, had heard them on the radio, had a few of them on her phone, saw their album promoted on Spotify, but somehow she’d failed to grasp just how popular, how famous the guys were rapidly becoming.

Their album was number one in the country - in most countries in fact - and there were rumors of Grammy nominations. The only reason they still managed to have some semblance of anonymity was the fact that their music was - thus far - more popular than their faces, but that was changing too. Emma had googled them… well, she’d googled him. It had started with the band really, but then she’d noticed a few fan sites and then stumbled on “Jones brothers thrist tweets” and then “Killian Jones thirst tweets”. It had been a rabbit hole from there.

She watched them now, playing the final few songs of their set. They looked so good up there, so natural. Liam had an incredible voice. Had he gotten better since she saw them play all those years ago? Or maybe it was just the songs they were playing, the ones everyone knew, the ones that made them famous, everyone was singing along. Every single one of their songs was fantastic, annoyingly so. The music was sometimes exciting and upbeat and lifted your heart up and sometimes it was heart wrenching but the lyrics made her feel like they had been written about specific moments in her own life. They brought back bittersweet memories and she wasn’t sure how to feel about that. She’d never quite connected to anyone else’s music like that. It was jarring.

She could hear Killian singing as well, it seemed they had decided to start sharing the lead singer role since Emma had last seen them play. She was sure he looked great up there too but she couldn’t know for certain since she was actively avoiding looking at him - had been for the last hour and a half - had been since they stepped out of the elevator six hours ago. She remembered though, remembered the last time she watched him play, watched him sing into the microphone like he was trying to seduce it - or at least trying to seduce every woman in the room. Her, she was reminded, he had been trying to seduce her.

She thought again about the show tomorrow, the size of the stadium and the number of people who would be watching and her palms started to sweat. She thought about playing there with Killian watching from backstage and her heart started racing. She stole a glance at him now. Big mistake. Suddenly she was back in the little bar in New York, she was back in the dressing room, and then she was back in the elevator this evening. She clenched her fists. Why had she agreed to this again?

“Hey! Why the long face?” Ruby demanded as she set their drinks down on the table and then threw herself into the booth beside them. “Mary Margaret! Why is she looking like she’s gonna pass out? You were on Emma duty. You’re supposed to be watching her and preventing grand escapes. Look at her! She’s about to bolt.”

Mary Margaret’s eyes snapped up to her friends and her face instantly flushed bright red. “I’m sorry!” she practically squeeked out, “she was fine a minute ago. I was watching the show and I got… distracted.” She was stealthy in her glance but not stealthy enough for Emma (and she suspected Ruby) to miss the way her eyes flickered to David before fluttering around as though she were actively trying to look anywhere else.

Ruby’s grin was enormous. “Mary Margaret, I’m shocked. Ignoring your Emma duties for a pair of pretty blue eyes?”

“I wasn’t -” she tried to defend herself but it fell flat.

Emma smiled despite herself as she watched her friends. Right. This was why she was here. They were why she was here. Wasn’t that always the case, her friends dragging her into insane situations and her left wondering how she’d managed to be dragged?

“If you could all stop talking about me in the third person that would be great,” she said but her annoyance also fell flat. “I can take care of myself,” she grinned, “so Mary Margaret can oggle drummers all she likes.” Her friend turned even redder.

“And what about you, then?” Ruby asked with her own shrewd smirk. “What’s got you in a cold sweat? Is it the show tomorrow or a certain guitarist with a penchant for eyeliner and an aversion to buttons?” Emma just glared at her, which only served to make Ruby laugh. “Thought so.”

They sat through the rest of the show, Emma sulking with her arms crossed over her chest, Mary Margaret actively looking everywhere except the stage, and Ruby throwing them shit-eating grins every chance she got. When the boys were on their last song of the night, Belle hurried over to their table to rush them backstage.

“They’re gonna do one encore, maybe two if they feel up to it, and then we’ll head out the side door where there’s a car waiting for you to take you back to the hotel. There will be people out there, they’re already lined up waiting to get autographs. You don’t have to say or do anything but a little ‘look how much they like their fans’ publicity is never a bad thing. Got it?” She said all this matter of factly, as though it wasn’t absolutely insane that there would be people outside hoping to get her autograph. They couldn’t possibly want hers, Belle must have meant they’d be wanting the boys’ autographs.

Ruby gave Belle a thumbs up and Belle nodded. “Great. I’ll get in the car with you guys and the boys will get in theirs and we’ll meet back at the hotel. There might be people there too although as far as we know word hasn’t leaked about where we’re staying.” Emma listened to all of this in a daze. This couldn’t be her life could it? This couldn’t all actually be happening.

By the time she had come back to the world around her she was being ushered out the side door behind the guy’s band and her own to a crowd of waiting fans all of whom were taking pictures and shouting “I love you’s”. She froze like a deer in the headlights, staring out at flashing lights and people who somehow knew her name and were shoving papers and pens at her. She froze, as though she’d lost control of her body. She knew she should be walking, that the gap between her and the others was growing wider but she couldn’t make her feet move.

Her heart was racing in her throat and she was just considering the fact that she might throw up when suddenly a hand grabbed her own. She recognized that hand, the warm, soft palm and the long, rough fingers that were wrapped around her own. She focused on the hand for a moment before focusing on it’s owner. Killian’s expression was soft though he was looking at her with some concern. He was always looking concerned around her, she realised. She felt bad about that.

He gave her a small nod and one side of his mouth quirked up when she met his eyes. “It’s okay, they don’t bite,” he said, giving her hand a little squeeze. “Usually.” He winked and it made her feet seem to suddenly remember they were connected to her brain. “Come on,” he coaxed. He led her through the crowd of people, through the shouts and the lights to the car where Belle was waiting holding the door open, Ruby and Mary Margaret already inside. He helped her into the car like she was some frightened Victorian damsel being helped into a carriage by some Austenian hero. He leaned in, checking that she was settled and turned to head to his own car without a word.

“Hey!” Emma called after him, speaking for the first time in what felt like hours. He looked back. “Thanks.”

He smiled, just a little thing. “It gets easier,” he promised.

“You know that’s going to be all over the internet tomorrow don’t you?” she heard Liam scold as Belle shut the door and jumped in the passenger seat. She saw Killian shrug, sign an autograph, and jump in his vehicle.

Once they were far enough away that she couldn’t see the boys or the venue anymore, she turned to her friends for the first time since getting in the car. They all looked nearly as amazed as she felt, though perhaps not quite as shellshocked.

“Holy fucking shit,” Ruby said and Emma laughed. She didn’t even know why she laughed, it was probably adrenaline or something but she couldn’t stop and soon all three of them were in hysterics, even Belle started giggling in the front seat. Holy fucking shit indeed.

***

They all ended up in Liam and Belle’s hotel room as they were all still riding the high of the show and Liam and Belle had the biggest room - which Killian gave his brother a hell of a lot of flack for. “Get yourself married and then you can have the big room,” Liam taunted his brother in retaliation.

They were finally winding down after what had been one of the longest days of Emma’s life. Between the flight and the soundcheck and the show she hadn’t had a minute to stop or to herself since yesterday afternoon. Usually, she would have found that incredibly draining, and she did on some level, but not in the way she expected. Part of the reason Emma had chosen her job was because it allowed her to work alone. That was how she liked it. Being around people all the time, having to be ‘on’, to have to interact and socialize with people exhausted her. People always expected something from her and when she didn’t live up to it they were disappointed. Ruby and Mary Margaret were, of course, the exception to that rule. But, for some reason, despite having spent the entire day surrounded by near strangers, Emma felt surprisingly… good.

It was strange how easy it was to be around Belle and the boys. Liam and Belle were adorably in love and, it turned out once they were out of the public eye, they were almost disgustingly affectionate. Still, she couldn’t help smiling at them, Belle curled in her husband’s lap, his arms wrapped around her as they sat on the carpeted floor, backs against the sofa.

David and Graham had instantly shifted into big brother mode - or what Emma imagined having big brothers would have been like. The two were one joke after the other while mercilessly teasing each other and occasionally Emma as well. She found she didn’t mind the teasing and had felt a sort of proud thrill at their excitement when she’d given it back just as hard.

And Killian, she didn’t know what it was about him but somehow just being in his presence made her feel relaxed, made her feel calm. It was like something that radiated from him, an openness and a gentleness that she’d been too distracted to really notice before. She could see that the others felt it too, even his brother, despite his constant put-on airs of indignation at Killian’s almost unshakable lightheartedness.

Calm, until he looked at her. When he looked at her, her heart suddenly started racing and her breath caught in her throat for a second before she composed herself and snapped out of it. This was new territory, feeling comfortable and on edge around someone at the same time. She didn’t know if she liked it. It scared her.

Only four of them were sat around on the floor now. Mary Margaret and David had disappeared into a corner somewhere where it looked like she was trying to teach him how to twirl a drumstick between his fingers. He was failing miserably, though Emma suspected he was exaggerating his incompetence so that Mary Margaret would keep scooting closer and readjusting his hand. He smiled everytime he dropped the stick and she laughed.

Killian’s phone had been plugged into a little portable speaker and music filled the room now. Ruby had somehow managed to convince Graham to dance. Well, she was dancing, he was kind of standing there, swaying awkwardly and letting her hold his hand and twirl while he watched her with a big dumb grin on his face.

The song switched and it took Emma a second before she recognized the guy’s first single. She smirked at Killian.

“You have your own song on your most played?” she teased. She’d meant it as a joke but Killian quickly reached for his phone to change songs. “You don’t have to change it,” Emma said, feeling bad now. “It’s a good song.”

“Put the song back on!” David demanded and Killian rolled his eyes but conceded when Graham, Mary Margaret and Ruby joined in the chant.

“A lot of your songs are good,” she said, addressing the group now. “I didn’t realise how many of them I actually knew until the show tonight.”

Killian laughed. “So nice to be recognised,” he teased and she felt better that he was laughing with her.

“I’m just saying, you guys are really good. Like yeah, your songs are catchy but they also have depth you know? Substance.” She felt herself get red at her awkward attempts at a compliment.

“That’s all Killian,” David called from the back of the room. “He’s the songwriter. The real poet of the gang. The bard of the band,” he singsonged and Emma laughed wondering how many drinks David had had tonight or if Mary Margaret had just met her match for the title for cheapest drunk.

“It’s not just me,” Killian insisted. “Liam writes too. We all do.” Modesty. Emma was shocked and she said so.

“Hardly,” Liam countered. He looked at Emma, “I dabble.”

“He wrote this one,” Killian countered, referring to the song still echoing through the speaker. Liam gave Killian a look that Emma couldn’t read but he didn’t say anything.

“You’re so lucky, Belle,” Ruby sighed from where she was now swaying along with Graham to the slower melody.

“How so?”

“To have a song about love at first sight written about you.” Oh boy, if Ruby was getting romantic it was definitely time to get her to bed.

“It’s not about love at first sight,” Killian said almost instantly and everyone turned to him. He looked up shocked, as if he hadn’t meant to say that out loud. He looked to his brother.

Liam cleared his throat. “He’s right. It’s not just about that,” he agreed. Emma couldn’t make sense of whatever unspoken conversation was happening between the Joneses at the moment. She blamed it on the rum. “It’s also about allowing yourself to be open to love again, to believe you deserve it.” Killian stared at his brother and Liam looked back as though daring him to say something.

Finally, David broke the tension. “Heavy, man.” That was enough to make everyone laugh and the awkwardness seemed to pass. He and Mary Margaret retreated back into their little bubble as did Ruby and Graham as the song switched to something more bluesy and she did something incredibly intentional and incredibly captivating with her hair. Graham just stared, awestruck. Poor boy, Emma thought. He doesn’t stand a chance.

“Speaking of great music,” Liam said, drawing her back to the conversation they’d been having. “You guys were great up there.”

“Yeah?” Emma asked and then wished she could snatch the words back. That had sounded so pathetic. She’d been so nervous though, it was nice to hear that it had gone well from an outside point of view.

“Hell yeah!” Belle answered for her husband. “You’re already trending on twitter,” she said, pulling out her phone to show her a video someone had taken of the concert with captions like ‘Emma Swan out of nowhere’, and ‘the next big thing?’ written underneath. Emma just stared, slackjaw. She didn’t know how to react to that. This wasn’t even in her wheelhouse of possible situations to have possible, reasonable reactions to. She handed the phone back to Belle who turned to Killian.

“Killian, you hadn’t heard her yet right?” He gave a hesitant shake of his head. “What did you think?” she prodded.

“Yeah, it was good,” he said, noncommittally, not looking her in the eye. Emma felt it like a blow to her chest.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Emma demanded.

“Nothing,” Killian insisted. “I said it was good.”

For some reason she didn’t understand, a part of her wanted him to like it. And was crushed that he didn’t. She wasn’t even aware of that want, that need until now. She was surprised by how much his rejection hurt, how much she had hoped for his praise. That feeling scared her. She’d never needed anybody’s praise, never needed anyone to make her feel valued, never needed to depend on anyone for anything and yet here she was, devastated because some guy had said ‘yeah, it was good’. It scared her, and when Emma got scared or hurt she got angry. And now she was both.

“If you don’t like my music you can just say so,” she snapped. “I’m a big girl, I can handle it.”

“I don’t not like it,” he said hesitantly and she crossed her arms over her chest, daring him to elaborate. He sighed, like he didn’t want to say what he was about to say. “Look, do you want me to be honest?“

"No, I want you to lie to me,” she snapped sarcastically.

"The songs you played tonight are fun, they’re catchy, people like them and you play really well.”

“But?” She wasn’t letting him off.

He let out a heavy sigh. “But your lyrics… they’re not about anything.” She jumped back as though he’d slapped her.

“Killian!” Liam started, but he went on.

“I just mean that they don’t reveal anything about you or have any depth beyond -”

“Killian. Stop.” Liam was insistent now and Killian looked at him for a second then shut his mouth.

“No, it’s okay,” Emma said to Liam. She was furious - furious because of how hurtful, how cruel his words had been and how much it hurt that it had been him that spoke them. And a small, very small part of her was angry because she knew it was true. She hadn’t written anything real in a long time; she hadn’t written about herself. She wrote about other people, told their stories but there was no emotion tied to it. But she had her reasons. She had her reasons and he didn’t know anything about them and he’d just…

“Not every song has to be some soul bearing journal entry,” she said, her voice bitter and quiet. “Music can just be fun.”

Killian looked at her for a long time, long enough to make her uncomfortable. She wasn’t sure what he was trying to get out of her. It felt like he knew something, something about her that he shouldn’t know and it had her on edge.

“You’re right,” he said finally. “I’m sorry.”

“Forget it.” Emma stood and made her way to the door. She didn’t want to stay here anymore, didn’t want to put up with anymore of his crap.

“Emma -” he started but she dismissed him.

As she left the room she could hear Ruby and Mary Margaret saying goodbye and rushing out after her and she could hear Liam speaking to his brother.

“You are an absolute dick.”

He sighed. “I know.”

She reached her room with her friends right on her tail. She didn’t have it in her. She couldn’t deal with the ‘it’s okays’ and the ‘he’s totally wrongs’ that they would have for her. Because the truth of it was that it wasn’t okay and he wasn’t totally wrong and having them try and defend her would just make her more upset about how deeply his words had cut her.

“Guys, listen, I just want to go to bed okay?” Her friends were hesitant to leave her alone. “Seriously, I’m tired and I’m pissed and I just… I just want to go to sleep and forget about it. Alright? We can talk tomorrow.” They hesitated for a minute longer but recognized her resolve and agreed. They each wrapped her in a giant bear hug before saying goodnight and promising to check on her in the morning.

She couldn’t sleep though. She tried. She roughly pulled on her pyjamas, fumed while she washed her face, and brushed her teeth with unnecessary aggression. She threw herself onto the mattress, pulling the comforter over her head in the hopes that she could block out all the thoughts in her head and silence the rage and hurt rushing through her veins. She lay there for exactly forty-five seconds.

Emma threw off her blankets, kicking her feet free before sitting on her bed, letting her head fall into her hands as she tried to calm down. When she looked up, having failed to stop picturing multiple ways she could murder Killian and not get caught, she saw her guitar sitting across the room. She stared at it for a long time, briefly considering if she could use it to murder Killian, before letting out a frustrated groan.

“Fucking damnit,” she snapped as she stood and snatched the instrument, falling back onto the mattress. She brought her fingers up to the frets but her hands were shaking too hard for her to play. No depth. Fuck him. She used to have depth, she used to have meaning - in her songs, in her life - but then he’d come along and ripped all of that away. Now all she was was empty. She could fill it sometimes with happy melodies and fun lyrics to try and patch up the hole left inside of her but whenever she tried, dug into the hole and tried to find something, there was nothing. Only pain, a pain so overwhelming that she would do anything to bury it again. Eventually she’d stopped digging.

She remembered the last time she’d tried, when she’d pushed through it long enough to find something worthwhile inside herself but it had been too much and she’d been overwhelmed by the memories - a hotel room, Nashville, playing with him, being with him, waiting for him… she let the guitar fall out of her hands to the floor. She just can’t.

Fuck you, Killian Jones.

#captain swan #cs fanfic #cs fanfiction #captain swan fanfic #captain swan fanfiction #cs smut #captain swan smut #killian jones #emma swan #liam x belle #cs #cs manip

23 notes · View notes