#and I haven’t spoken to her since. I think she quit her job . and that guy was not a nice man

[deadandphilgames]

oversharing in the tags time :)

[boul3vvard]

REMEMBER ME

Tengen x fem reader x Rengoku

(One shot)

♡ Synopsis:  You and Tengen used to be in love with each other until he decided to add 3 more into the picture now it just feels a little cramped.

♡ warning(s): content contains fem pronoun’s reader is a woman. + Tengen’s wives

♡ y/n l/n = your first and last name

♡ words: 2000+

♡ notes: hi boulevard here! this is my first story/one shot so please be nice🤗 might be punctuation errors/ not proofread enough. ENJOY☆

♡ reblogs and interactions are much appreciated thank youu

★color coded for some of the Hashira★

  There hasn’t been a moment where y/n hadn’t crossed Tengen's mind. every single time he closed his Fuchsia eyes a beautiful image of her flashing across his mind he knew he wasn’t whole without her all he wanted was to hear her laugh, see her smile, listen to her go on and on about meaningless things, feel her body upon his in ways that were only imaginable now, he wanted to feed into those fantasies but couldn’t, he couldn’t cause she’s gone. y/n left without a trace her footsteps so light even the sound pillar couldn’t pick up on them before it was too late, Tengen was heartbroken. He sat up off the futon and looked down at his wives who were sound asleep on either side of him. “I’ve got to find her” he managed to untangle his limbs from theirs without causing too much of a ruckus leaving to go sit outside for a bit Hina watching the man go silently not saying a word as she heard his last statement. Y/n was not doing greater than Tengen either she felt like her feelings meant nothing to the man she felt like he couldn’t care less about where she ended up so she did him a favor and left. y/n decided to grieve the loss of her relationship in private, she couldn’t believe he gave his relationship up for a couple of women, women she never really spoke 2 words to don’t get her wrong tho she thought they were beautiful extremely beautiful at that and they all tried to get along with her but still...

Time skip★彡

       

  It’s been 3 years since Tengen and y/n crossed paths and in those 3 years y/n took the time to focus on herself, her training, and missions while simultaneously rising from her position as kinoe to a Hashira. There was a Hashira meeting at the master's estate waiting to be held that afternoon to welcome the new Hashira “I’m so nervous what if they doubt me? What if they think I’m incapable of doing such a job? What if they hate me?” “Woah slow down you're gonna make yourself sick from worrying so much take a deep breath and relax for a bit,” the smaller woman said with a dainty smile “but Kochou sama” “how many times do I have to tell you that you and I are friends quit being so formal you’re a Hashira now” “sorry” y/n said Bowing her head “plus I know why you’re worried,” Shinobu said teasingly “you do” “I do” shinobu sat down next to her “you’re gonna be fine I know the two of you haven’t spoken these last few years, of course, it’s gonna be awkward for a while I mean duh you two were married idiot but I promise you, you have nothing to worry about and if it is too much let me know I’m here u know you have friends you can talk to” y/n chuckled “thank you Shinobu” “no problem now let’s go if you want to make a good impression how about we show up on time” y/n smiled once more “lead the way”

          “You all should know by now as to why I called you all here today” the master stated everyone quickly got in line and bowed to the sickly man “I would love for you all to meet our new Hashira, please make her feel welcomed my children “y/n please make your way up front and introduce yourself” the master said with a welcoming hand “hello everyone my name is y/n l/n the ____ Hashira it’s a pleasure to meet you all I hope I’ll be able to meet everyone’s standards I will not disappoint” y/n said with red tinted ears as she spoke. “unbelievable” Tengen said under his breath “how flashy is she?” he said with a smile looking down. after y/n’s promotion everyone decided to stay a little bit to try and get to know her. “tch if you don’t want to be a disappointment how about you and I go 1 on 1 to see if you really have what it takes to be a Hashira” shinazugawa sanemi said with a huge intimidating smile on his face “must u try to fight everyone who is within arms reach of you” the voice coming from up in a tree belonging to the serpent Hashira Iguro Obanai “shut the hell up” sanemi said whipping his head in his direction. “HE’S RIGHT THOUGH THE MASTER JUST SAID WE SHOULD MAKE HER FEEL WELCOMED WILL SAVE IT FOR ANOTHER DAY” y/n internally cringed at how loud the man was, still not used to his tone. “DONT WORRY ABOUT HIM” y/n laughed softly at his loud antics “you’re so loud kyo” “kyo?” Tengen said raising a brow brushing it off as the other Hashira went on. “ahhh she’s so cute and really beautiful” said Kanroji Mitsuri the love Hashira blushing “u keep blushing like that obanai might get jealous” Shinobu teased making mitsuri hide her embarrassed face in her hands “shut up” Obanai said angrily “i don’t really care if she’s strong or not I’m probably gonna forget her existence anyway” the mist Hashira Tokito Muichirou said with a stoic express “huh?” Y/n said looking in his direction. The stone Hashira giving her his greeting as well. Y/n then went to go greet the water Hashira but he turned around quickily wanted to avoid making a fool outta himself “wait” y/n said with a hand out to him “don’t mind him” shinobu came up grabbing y/n by the arm “he’s always like that”. y/n was kinda shocked that she made it through the entire meeting without talking to Tengen not that she was avoiding him she just expected him to be a little more well how he usually is “I guess not” y/n smiled sadly as she began to walk away.

      After the meeting everyone made their way to their respective homes or hung out with friends “y/n?, Mitsuri and I are going to this new cafe in town would you like to hang out with us?” “I’m a little exhausted so I was thinking about going home for a bit” “come on Shinobu I’ve been trying to go for weeks” Mitsuru said tugging on Shinobu’s haori “okay rest up we can hang out another day,” Shinobu said with a smile and wave y/n waved back. beginning her journey back home y/n felt her nerves begin to pool in her stomach as she felt like someone was following her, she walked with her hand on the hilt of her sword ready to attack if something jumped out at her. y/n looked up at the sky watching the clouds move in quickly and just as she thought it started to rain. after a couple of minutes she made it back home safely She took off her shoes by the front door and left down the hall of her new estate to freshen up a bit after being completely soaked. after bathing and putting on a change of clothes y/n laid down ready to fall asleep until she heard a knock at her front door. y/n groaned agitated after being so close to falling asleep “that’s funny I don’t remember inviting anyone here” she said to herself as she picked up her nichirin blade for protection ready to attack she opened to door and her heart almost exploded as she saw who was standing right in front of her “Woah” Tengen said putting his arms up in front of him y/n sighed in relief “what the hell Uzui I could’ve hurt you, how do you know where I live? “I followed you” he smiled. After the 2 had settled down both not saying a word to each other “so..Wh- what are you doing here?” Y/n said softly looking up at the large man “I came to see you” “why” y/n was stunned she hasn’t seen Tengen in 3 years “it’s raining would you like to come inside?” “If it’s no problem with you” “I will get you some towels hold on” y/n made her way down the hallway to retrieve the items and Tengen took no time to take in the scenery. ~so this is where she’s living? Hmm it’s nice~ he thought to himself with a soft smile on his face. Y/n came back with a towel for the man and handed it to him “is there anything else you need” “no” y/n sat quietly anxiety rising while they were sitting in silence alone Tengen breaking it “ur place is lovely” “thank you,” y/n said fidgeting with her hands in her lap another wave of silence flooding them soon after. “Uzui why are u here?” “hmm I thought I said-“ “no. What are you doing here? Did something happen with you four? Tengen just stared at the h/c haired girl “it’s been 3 years y/n wh- why did you go? I thought you loved me? I thought we were gonna be together? I thought we were happy?” “You were happy Uzui sama I wasn’t” y/n said deadpanned “I tried to tell you multiple times how uncomfortable I felt and you never cared… you never cared about my feeling entirely at least.” Y/n spoke out again trying to keep her emotions from spilling out. “I see the way you look at those three, and you never looked at me in that way ever. You looked at them…..you looked at them with love” y/n said “I’m not saying that you never loved me but you don’t love me the way you love them if you loved me I would have been enough” y/n stated as her chest started to feel like it was on fire, her heart shattering like it did that night before. “I do owe you an apology for up and leaving without a trace but I’m not sorry FOR leaving” “besides all of this I’m glad that you’re doing okay, all of you really” y/n looked up at Tengen and smiled softly “I’m glad that you guys have each other.. I may not know them a whole lot but when u talked about them before they sounded amazing” Tengen stared at the girl with wide eyes “I’m so sorry y/n I should’ve listened to you more I should’ve paid more attention” “but you didn’t”.

“But… hey it’s not all bad” “it’s not?” Tengen raised a brow curious about what the young girl had to say “I’ve met someone a while ago and he and I really set it off he's good to me" y/n looked away with a cheesy smile "we are to be married in the fall” “I do like him” “he’s a demon slayer himself but I’m totally fine with that since we do plan to retire once we defeat and upper moon” a soft “oh” left the man’s lips. they sat in silence once again this time y/n breaking it “I want you to know something Uzui Sama “Tengen, call me Tengen..like you used to” the man said in a weak plea “look Tengen?” Y/n said with a quirked brow she hasn’t said that name in a while the name feeling almost unfamiliar falling off of her lips "I still care about you and I do hope that one day you and I could mend what was left of our relationship into a friendship, I still love you, you know” y/n tilting her head as she spoke “no matter what but... I guess you and I were not meant to be so please don't worry about me okay i'll be fine” y/n said while putting her smaller hand against his larger ones she then looked into her lap and right back up at him “yea”

          “WAHHHH TENGEN SAMA HAS BEEN GONE FOR A VERY LONG TIME WHAT IF SOMETHING HAPPENED TO HIM” Suma shouted. “this is not the time for you to be throwing your tantrums u big baby besides do you think Tengen sama would not be able to hold his own” Makio nudged harshly as Suma was making her anxiety strengthen, the two argued. As if it was in queue, Tengen walked through the door of their shared estate and the two stopped their fighting and ran up to him to see if he was okay or if he needed any medical attention. “WHERE WERE YOU?” Makio shouted trying to hide the fact that she was just as worried as Suma “YEA WE THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD” Makio slapped her on the back of her head “NO WE DIDNT YOU IDIOT” “DID YOU SEE THAT TENGEN SAMA MAKIO HIT ME” Tengen sighed “I’m fine I just decided to visit an old friend of mine,” Tengen said gingerly as he pats Sumas head he then looked to his left to see his other wife sitting quietly to herself, Tengen noticed Hina lost in thought tapping her curiously “What’s wrong? U haven’t peeped a word since I came home” Tengen chuckled. Drawing the other two attention, everyone staring in Hina’s direction waiting for her to speak “it’s just- well I feel a little bad” “why?” “We chased y/n away. She wasn’t comfortable being in a polyamorous relationship with us and she left you” “we came between the both of your relationship and ruined it I- I feel awful”. Tengen was stunned he didn’t know that Hina knew what he was up to let alone worried Tengen pulled Hina into his lap the other two hugging in on both sides “don’t worry this has nothing to do with any of you, I love all 3 of you nonetheless and I’ll be sure to get y/n back no matter what it takes” and with that they enjoyed the rest of their uneventful evening together.

©Boul3vvard. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. SO ANY FORM OF PLAGIARISM OF MY CONTENT WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.

[made-ofmemories]

Also on AO3

Click click click. It’s driving her insane, the rhythmic clicking of a Rubik's cube being turned over and over again. Robin has had to listen to it all morning. She’s standing by the cash register sorting through a pile of returns and Steve is sitting on the floor behind her, legs stretched out in front of him twisting the Rubik's cube around and around. She doesn’t think he’s even trying to solve it.

“Keith’s going to tear us both a new one if he finds you sitting on your ass, you know?” She says over her shoulder with mild disinterest. Ordinarily, she wouldn’t care about what Keith has to say, but they’re on their last strike and she really doesn’t want to go through the hassle of job hunting again. 

“Keith’s not here and we haven’t had a customer in hours.” It’s barely more than a mutter followed by the thump of Steve’s head against the shelf he’s propped up against.

She sighs and turns to face him, crossing her arms as she leans back against the counter. He’s right it has been an exceptionally slow day, but there’s something else going on he’s just not telling her what. He was quiet on the way to work and he’s barely spoken a word since they got here, he just sits there frowning at that damn Rubik's cube.

“Alright.” She tries to sound stern, but it just comes out concerned, “What’s going on?”

“Nothing.”

“ Steve .” She moves to sit opposite him when he doesn’t respond, nudging his leg with her foot to get his attention. “Talk to me.”

“Eddie asked me out,” He blurts it out in such a rush she’s not sure she’s hearing correctly at first. “On a date.”

“Oh.” 

She isn’t exactly surprised, Eddie has been flirting with Steve for weeks and every time Steve doesn’t shut it down he just gets bolder. Steve would have let him down gently, she’s sure of that. But Eddie is more sensitive than people realize under all that bravado and the last thing she wants is for him to get hurt, for either of them to get hurt. She should have done something about it, talked to Eddie, and stopped it before it got this far, but it never felt like her place to interfere.

“I’m sure it’ll be ok. He’ll understand, he-”

“I said yes.”

“ Oh .”

“Yeah, oh. ”

“And you want to?” She keeps her words slow and careful. “Go on this date I mean.” He nods, looks down at the Rubik's cube in his hands for a moment then back at her. 

“I don’t think I’m gay, Robs.” He’s quiet when he speaks, lacking his usual confidence.

“Ok.” There’s a pause, but Robin doesn’t interrupt, just waits patiently until he’s ready to continue.

“I still like girls, it’s just…” He frowns, runs a hand through his hair, and lets out a frustrated groan as if he can’t quite find the words, “I think I like boys too. When I’m with Eddie I feel the same way I feel when I have a crush on a girl, and I don’t think Eddie is the first. I think I’ve felt it before with others, other men I mean, but I’ve always been too scared to admit it.”

“So you like both?” She asks, hoping she’s been following along correctly. He nods again.

“Do you think I’m weird?”

“Oh absolutely.” She shuffles across the distance between them so they’re side by side and takes one of his hands into hers, their fingers intertwined. “I’ve always thought you were a weirdo, dingus. But not because of that.” It earns her a smile and he lets his head drop onto her shoulder.

“I really like him.” He sounds all dreamy and lovestruck and she has to bite her tongue to resist the urge to tease him for it, he just makes it too easy sometimes. 

“I’m glad you told me.” 

“I wanted to tell you earlier,” He admits, “But I didn’t know how, I was still figuring it all out myself I think.”

“Does that mean you’re going to put that damn Rubik's cube down now.”

“Yeah.” He chuckles. “No more Rubik's cube.”

Steve doesn’t say anything else and she doesn’t want to push more than she already has so she holds onto his hand a little tighter and embraces the companionable silence they’ve fallen into. The sound of the door opening comes a few minutes later and she shrugs the shoulder Steve is leaning on, not entirely sure if he’s even still awake. She doubts he got much sleep last night.

“Your turn,” She tells him and he gets up without argument.

“Hi! Welcome to-” He starts in his usual overly peppy customer service tone before he cuts himself off, “Oh- Hi Keith!” 

“Oh shit,” Robin mutters under her breath, scrambling to her feet as quickly as possible. She grabs a tape on her way up so it at least looks like she was down there searching for something and gives Keith the brightest smile she can muster. 

“We are so screwed,” Steve whispers through gritted teeth as they watch Keith making his way toward them.

“I heard the coffee shop across the street was hiring?” She offers in a similarly hushed tone. She’s only partially joking. 

[torreshalstead]

Words like knives

Summary - Strolling through the grocery store on a Saturday with Tim, running into her mother was the last thing she would have expected. And yet there she was.

Notes - Just my little take on Lucy’s moms reaction to finding out about Tim and Lucy. Hope you enjoy! AO3 Link

Lucy couldn’t help the smile tugging on her lips as she strolled through the grocery store arm in arm with Tim. There was something about the mundane domestic tasks that she used to do alone, having a partner to do them with made them so much less mundane and so much more enjoyable. Tim had decided he wanted to cook for them tonight at his place, however as they normally ate at hers, his cupboards were bare meaning that a trip to the store was required. Lucy wasn’t going to complain. Tim was quite a cook so tonight’s meal was sure to be delicious, even if they did have to spend the time getting everything for it.

‘Damn, I forgot… I’ll be right back’, Tim said with a quick peck to her cheek before he headed back down the aisle they had been in previously.

Lucy smiled to herself as she slowly meandered down the current aisle, glancing at the shelves but choosing instead to daydream about the man who was the reason behind her smile.

‘Lucy?’

The recognition of that voice pulled her out of her daydream with a jolt.

‘Mom?’

Her mother was standing in front of her; she was the last person Lucy expected to see today. She hadn’t seen her since she had kicked her out of her apartment when she had become a P2 and had been told her career was worthless. She had spoken to her since then, but could count on one hand how many times that had been, usually just wishing a happy birthday or Mother’s Day via a quick phone call.

‘I didn’t know you shopped here? It’s far from your apartment, unless you’ve moved?’ Vanessa Chen always had a knack for asking the questions that her daughter would have preferred not to answer.

‘Umm, no I haven’t moved. I, umm, just like it here’, Lucy said quickly, hoping her answer would appease her mother and prevent any further questions. However that appeared to be wishful thinking when Vanessa doubled down.

‘But surely the travel costs here mean it’s more expensive to shop here. You must be sensible with your money Lucy. Your chosen career’, her mother had to stop to swallow at this, almost as though she was actively disgusted with her daughter's profession, ‘doesn’t allow much room for promotion or pay rises.’

‘There’s plenty of room for promotion being a police officer’, Lucy said, slightly softer than she normally would when talking to her mother. She was attempting to avoid confrontation and also to end the conversation as quickly as possible before Tim returned.

‘Well if you went back to school, like your father and I suggested, you’d be able to get a much better paying position and be able to move out of that apartment and you could shop here all the time.’ Her mother reached across to smooth out an imaginary crease on Lucy’s jacket and dusted down the sleeve. It was a way her mother continued to assert her power in situations, demonstrating not only her distaste of Lucy’s job but also of her fashion choices and clearly by the tone of the conversation, her living arrangements as well.

‘Mum, we’ve had this conversation before. I am not going back to school’, Lucy huffed whilst her mother brushed off the comment with a wave of her hand.

‘It would be the best thing for you Lucy. Your father and I have always thought so.’

Just as Lucy was in the process of biting her tongue to prevent engaging in a full blown argument in the condiments aisle of the store, the thing she had been dreading happened.

‘Hey babe, I found it.’ Tim had returned from his excursion to source whatever he had forgotten but was glancing at the label when he walked up to Lucy, not noticing who she was talking to until it was too late. ‘Oh, umm, Mrs Chen, lovely to see you’. He said nervously, depositing the items in the basket Lucy was holding and shooting her an apologetic glance. If he hadn't called her babe, they may have been able to brush off the fact that they were shopping together on a Saturday, but unfortunately, that was now impossible.

Vanessa shot a glaring look at Lucy before her gaze returned to Tim, looking him up and down in a disparaging way before her eyes locked firmly on her daughter.

‘So, the way to get promoted in your profession is to sleep with your superiors to get ahead. I thought we taught you better than this Lucy,’ her mother spat at her with disgust. Lucy’s jaw hit the floor. She knew her mother disapproved but never did she think she would accuse Lucy of sleeping her way to the top. She spluttered but was unable to get a word out before Tim stepped in.

‘Apologies ma'am, but I am not Lucy’s superior and I can assure you that any promotion Lucy receives in the future will not be as a result of who she is having a relationship with. Your daughter is an exceptional police officer and deserves every accolade she receives’. Tim said calmly, resting his hand on Lucy’s back in an attempt to calm her and show support.

‘Well you would say that seeing as you’re the one clearly having an affair with her!’ Vanessa said loudly, causing the other occupants of the aisle to look over before quickly making their way to another part of the store.

‘Mom!’ Lucy tried not to stamp her foot like a child but her mother’s reaction was causing her anger to bubble up inside. ‘Tim and I are not having an affair. We are in a loving, committed relationship!’

‘Of course you are’, Vanessa scoffed and turned her attention to Tim now. ‘I always had my suspicions but this just confirms them. You use your position of power to intimidate and coerce young innocent women into thinking they are in love with you. And then you’ll just discard them and move on to the next one!’ Vanessa's voice had returned to a more acceptable level however her tone was laced with venom and anger as she hurled the accusations at Tim. ‘Such a great example of the LAPD you are,’ she let out a harsh laugh as Lucy felt Tim’s palm tighten on her back, ‘taking advantage of those under your command’.

‘Mom, I am not under Tim’s command anymore and he’s not taking advantage of me, nor has he ever taken advantage of anyone. Just because you think all police are evil and corrupt, does not give you the right to talk to my boyfriend or me that way.’ Lucy squared her shoulders and grabbed Tim’s hand off her back, squeezing it tightly. ‘And I have no more to say.’ Tugging Tim behind her, she walked with purpose to the end of the aisle and took a left but before she had a chance to take more than a step or two, Tim had pulled her into a tight hug and she felt herself collapse into him.

‘I’m sorry’, he muttered into her hair. ‘She shouldn’t say things like that to you’.

‘I’m sorry too,’ she said but her words were muffled as she was pressed tightly against his chest. ‘She has no right to speak to you that way’. She pulled back so she could look at him but kept her arms firmly around his back. ‘You know nothing she said about you is true, you’re not taking advantage of me and I know you’d never abuse your position like that’.

Tim nodded, he knew that but he would be lying if he said Vanessa’s words hadn’t touched a nerve. He knew how he felt about Lucy, knew how she felt about him but was aware that to the outside world, if they knew the history, or at least parts of it, it might come across that way. A TO dating his Rookie. But their relationship was nothing like that, and anyone who knew them, knew that. And they were the only people who mattered.

‘I know Luce, I know,’ he said as he bent down to drop a kiss to her forehead, giving her a gentle squeeze before releasing her. ‘I know,’ he repeated, taking her hand in his and continuing onwards to the next aisle, hoping to put what had just occurred in the rear view.

As the pair continued to wander through the store, collecting the various ingredients they would need for that evening’s dinner, the conversation with Lucy’s mom was playing on both of their minds. Neither said anything but continued to maintain contact just a little bit more purposefully than they normally would do in public, nothing that would cause any raised eyebrows but keeping at least one point of connection at any time.

Lucy was reeling. She had become used to her mother’s opinion of her and her profession but had hoped that seeing her daughter in a happy and loving relationship would have brought her mother a sense of joy. But instead, it seemed to make her less approving of Lucy. Her mother had been on at her for years to get a boyfriend and settle down, she had even paid for her to freeze her eggs for god's sake. And here she was happy and with someone she could actually see a future with and her mother had insulted him.

Tim was equally angry but his anger was mixed with sadness. He knew Lucy wanted approval from her mother and that even though she tried to brush off the comments she made, it hurt Lucy when she insulted her career. He was so proud of Lucy and everything she had achieved, he wished her mom could see her for the person and the cop she was, rather than the idealistic version of her daughter that she had created in her brain.

Reaching the check out, Tim spotted Vanessa entering the household cleaning aisle and decided he couldn’t keep it in any longer.

‘I’ll just be a second’, he said as he strolled towards the aisle Vanessa had just walked down, leaving a confused Lucy in his wake.

‘Mrs Chen’, he said loudly as he approached her. Vanessa turned around, disapproval still etched across her face. ‘I don’t need you to like me, or even approve of the relationship I have with your daughter. But I have to tell you that by not accepting Lucy as the person she is now, you’re going to lose any chance of knowing the person she is going to become. She is a great cop, one of the best I’ve ever trained. She’s gone on undercover missions, taken down drug cartels and stopped murderers and has never asked for praise for any of it. She does it because she loves it, helping people, keeping the city safe. It’s who she is. Now I know that being a police officer is not what you had in mind for Lucy, that you want something different for her. And I understand that. Being a cop in LA is not easy, and it’s not always safe. But it’s who she is. And asking her to change, would be asking her to lose a part of herself, and that would crush her.’

‘One day Lucy will become a detective, or a Sergeant, or a Captain, and if you were there to celebrate those achievements with her, it would make them all the more special. But just because you don’t support them, doesn’t mean she is going to achieve them. Some day, I hope, she will become a mother and she will be exceptional at that too. She will want her kids, our kids to get to know their grandparents. But she won’t, if you aren’t proud of the woman that she is. Your words hurt, Mrs Chen. And I have promised to never let anything hurt Lucy, I love her. And that means I can’t let you hurt her either. So please, Mrs Chen. Just think about it.’ Tim didn’t wait for a response before turning on his heel and heading back towards Lucy, leaving a baffled Vanessa standing alone in the middle of the aisle.

He hoped that she had taken his words to heart, he meant every word of them and he didn’t want Lucy to go through anymore pain and upset where her parents were involved.

—————————————————————————

As they unloaded the groceries into the truck, Tim spoke up, ‘I went back to speak to your mom’.

Lucy turned around quickly, ‘you did what? Tim-’

‘I know, but I had to let her know that what she said hurt you and that if she kept it up, she’d lose out on the opportunity to know the incredible woman you are. I’m sorry if I overstepped but I had to’, he looked sincerely at her, trying to gauge her emotions.

‘It’s okay’, she said after a moment, reaching out to hold his hands. ‘I do appreciate you standing up for me’. She smiled.

‘You do?’

Lucy nodded, ‘I can stand up for myself, and I know you know that’, Tim nodded as she smirked. ‘But it can get tiring, so sometimes it’s nice when someone else does for a change.’

‘Well we’re a team, so sometimes we have to share the load’, Tim squeezed her hand as he leaned against the tailgate of his truck, tugging her to stand between his legs.

‘What did you say to her?’ Lucy asked curiously.

‘I told her how incredible you are, and that someday you’ll get a promotion at work and you’d appreciate it if she was there to support you. I said someday you’ll be an amazing mother and would want your kid-’

‘Our kids’, Lucy interrupted him with a smile which Tim returned happily.

‘Our kids, to have a relationship with their grandparents but if she didn’t accept you for who you are then she would miss out on that chance.’ Lucy’s eyes started to glisten with the hint of tears but the smile hadn’t left her face so Tim continued. ‘I told her that I love you and I promised to protect you from anything that hurt you, and if she hurts you that means protecting you from her as well.’

‘Thank you’, Lucy whispered as she pulled herself into his chest and hugged him tightly.

‘I meant every word of it Lucy’, he whispered against her cheek as he pulled her further into his embrace, not caring that they were in the middle of the parking lot, not caring who saw that a tear may have escaped the corner of his eye. Just being present in the moment that the woman he loved was in his arms and he would never have to let her go.

[englishstrawbie]

Station 19 6x14

This one got a bit long, sorry! 

Carina turning up at the station for their first date was dumb. What kind of first date was that supposed to be? Answer: a plot device, so that Carina was there when the call came in from Pam and she could take Maya and Ben with her. So I’ll take it for what it was. I did enjoy dorky Maya taking her on a tour of the station, and Andy and Vic being good friends by joining in. 

So, Pushy Pam was back and, bless her, that was quite a pickle she was in. I always love seeing Doctor DeLuca and I always appreciate how in awe Maya is when she gets to see Carina at work. That look between them after the baby was born? Swoon. 🥰

I liked the hint of jealous!Maya and that Carina’s drinks with Pushy Pam weren’t a big deal to either of them. I get Carina feeling lonely but do you know what would fix that? Giving her some friends at the hospital! You know who else is lonely now both her sisters have moved away? Amelia. 

I really love that Maya talked to Carina about the photos that Dixon gave her, how she was honest about what happened and the fact that she wants her job as Captain back. Carina’s face when she said it? Oof, so much fear that the Maya she has been getting to know again hasn’t changed like she promises she has. And then when Maya says “not like that”, the relief was written all over her face. ❤️

I thought the kiss was sweet, if a little underwhelming... and their hand placements, argh that drives me crazy! But I did love their expressions as they parted, as if they wanted to keep going but knew it was the wrong time and place. I really do hope we see them on a date away from the station next week. We deserve that, don’t we?

I like that Maya took the photos to Andy and that she was the voice of reason while Andy was the one who was pissed. I’m glad it’s the two of them taking the photos to Chief Ross next week.

As for the rest...

Chief Dearborn??? 👀

“Have you eaten anything suspicous... like Maya’s lasagna?” 🤭

Sullivan being annoyed that he didn’t get the job he thinks he deserves, as if Theo also didn’t deserve it. And yes, Theo is being an ass and he needs to figure out whatever is going on in his head, but he proved himself as lieutenant just as much as Andy and Sullivan did. 🤷🏼‍♀️

The awkward love triangle between Travis, Eli and Andy didn’t last long. I kinda wish it had rumbled on, it could have been fun. But I’m glad Travis endorsed the other guy and took himself out of the race for mayor, because I just didn’t care. 

Jack hitting his head and being weird all episode was a bit of a nonsense - he looks fine in next week’s promo. Speaking of which... 

The comment from Ross is interesting... “this is the smoking gun you’ve been waiting for, why aren’t you using it?” - Are you telling me that Chief Ross had one of her employees have a breakdown, injure herself at the station, end up hospitalised and 5150′d, go through mandated therapy and they haven’t spoken about it? She clearly has no idea about the work that Maya has done or the progress she has made since that incident. 🤦🏼‍♀️

[tagthescullion]

Diplomacy: a Net of Embellished Lies

Fandom(s): Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Heroes of Olympus

Rating: G

Summary: Five times Nico lied to the people around him, and one time he told the truth.

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4

AO3 link

Chapter 5: The Doors

“He’s turned up in Camp Jupiter.”

Hades’ eyes lingered on his son’s troubled expression. 

“Percy Jackson,” Nico clarified. “He’s been accepted into the legion.”

“How relieving,” he told the boy. “I’ll be able to sleep peacefully tonight knowing my sister has released my brother’s favourite bastard.”

Nico gave him a look that conveyed extraordinary amounts of contempt considering his age. 

“Isn’t that good?” He asked. “You said Hera’s plan might work.”

“No, that’s not what I said,” Hades refuted. “What I did tell you was that it might work out for you and Hazel. If Hera managed to bring your two peoples together, that would give you a valid excuse to be seen around with your Roman sister.”

It gave him an uncomfortable shiver to think of the whole Greek/Roman division. But he’d rather fade into oblivion than let his son see him in such a weakened state.

“You don’t believe it could bring both camps together, then?” Nico wondered.

Hades hesitated for a moment. “I am not sure it is such a solid bet as my sister believes it to be. There’s many years of bad blood between both sides.”

“I know that,” Nico said. “But the stakes are high enough that they must see we have to work together!” 

“Rationally, your differences could be put aside for the greater good,” Hades agreed. “My grandmother is a formidable enemy and so are her second batch of children, it’s unlikely you could beat them without cooperating.” He made himself more comfortable in his throne, he’d been on edge for months, with the disappearance of Thanatos, and the issue with the Doors. Yet he made an effort to make his son understand. He was an idealist, he needed things spoken clearly. “But you’ve lived part of a memorable mortal conflict in your childhood, haven’t you? Tell me, how well did people put their differences aside to beat a common enemy back then?”

“That’s not the same,” Nico argued. “Those were governments. This is just… a bunch of children.”

“Why, of course,” Hades nodded. “Teenagers have always been known to be more reasonable and level-tempered than adults.”

The boy exhaled, no doubt in an attempt to avoid rolling his eyes at Hades, which would have ended up with him grounded for a month, life-or-death conflict be damned.

“I only mean,” Nico began slowly. “That I think leaders of both camps are much less corrupt and selfish than governments tend to be. They would at least consider cooperating.”

“Let us hope so,” Hades said. “In any way, we should first wait for Hazel and her two companions to return from their quest before we start speculating.”

Nico looked uncomfortable. “They will return, won’t they?”

“Only the fates can tell,” Hades stated. “Thanatos must be returned to his position as my lieutenant. Spirits are growing uneasy without him.”

He was rather worried, if he was honest. As Hades, the fear he felt for his Roman daughter was slightly dampened, but he still wanted her to return unharmed. It irritated him to be unable to help, even if subtly, while she was in Alaska. Damned place, just off the extent of his powers.

And, of course, the issue with the Doors of Death was much worse than he wanted to admit. Spirits returning? His family would never let him hear the end of it.

He could almost hear it, ‘You have one job, brother, do  try to do it properly’, they would be unbearable.

“How are you faring without him?” Nico asked. “It’s been quite a while.”

His tone was concerned, which Hades both appreciated and found ironic, since the boy had benefited from the situation when it suited him, but Nico needn’t worry about such things. Or perhaps he should, if he could use the information to put pressure on either camp.

“The Furies can keep things in order here, for the time being,” he replied. “The problem is that the other side of the Doors is in Tartarus.”

Nico paled. “I see…” 

“Yes, it’s not ideal.”

“And, hypothetically,” Nico commented. Hades frowned, he never liked his son’s hypothetical questions. “How would one be able to close them, then?”

“You defeat Gaea,” he explained. “Either you blackmail her or bribe her into closing them herself —rather unlikely, as you can imagine—, or you send a couple of expendable creatures to close them from Tartarus.”

“Demigods, for example?”

“No,” Hades dismissed the notion with a wave of his hand. “Demigods could never make it, your kind is not prepared for the abyss, your mind would shut off.”

Nico frowned. “You once told me demigods were ideal for all this crap because we were part of both worlds.”

“You have an incredible ability to distort my words into whatever is convenient for you, did you know?” Hades was losing his patience. “I told you that demigods were my family’s ideal tool to annoy me by sending them here —to the civilised bit of the Underworld— bearing demands. Not to dive into Tartarus in a suicide mission for their souls to be lost forever.”

“The soul would be lost?” That seemed to concern his son more than the rest.

“Of course,” Hades confirmed. “Thanatos —assuming he ever returns to his post— wouldn’t venture that far to pick up a wayward foolish spirit. Besides, who would be idiotic enough to—” Then it clicked. “Absolutely not.”

“What? I didn’t say anyth—”

“You’re not about to throw yourself into Tartarus,” Hades ordered. “That’s the most ridiculous plan you’ve come up with so far, and the Fates know you’ve had plenty of wacky ideas.”

“Now who’s understanding whatever they want?” Nico snapped. “I didn’t imply that I’d go to Tartarus, it was all theoretical.”

Hades stared at him firmly. “You want to close the Doors.”

“That would be useful,” he confessed with a self-conscious shrug. “But I didn’t know they were in Tartarus.”

“And now that you do know,” Hades insisted. “You won’t go near that cave, will you?”

Nico stayed silent.

“Answer me,” Hades demanded. “Promise me you won’t be reckless enough to go near that bloody cave.”

His son looked at him defiantly. But staring contests were Hades’ speciality. Even his spoiled youngest brother couldn’t beat him.

Reluctantly —very, very reluctantly—, Nico nodded. “All right. I won’t.”

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Don't Go Blindly Into the Dark

Summary:

To hide that he can't read, Jan Van Eck has been forcing his son to pretend he's blind since he was eight years old. Wylan is now attending Ketterdam University, and meeting Jesper Fahey may very well be about to change his life. But is he safe to tell Jesper the truth? And what will Jesper say if he does?

Jesper is struggling to weigh up his life in the Barrel and his life at the University of Ketterdam, and there's a good chance that his growing debt is about to make the decision for him. He hasn't attended class consecutively for months, but maybe that will change when his newest project includes partnering up with Wylan Van Eck. But can he really leave the Barrel behind him? And how long can he keep up the pretence of who he thinks Wylan wants him to be?

Tags: @justalunaticfangirl @lunarthecorvus

If anyone else would like to be tagged let me know :)

Content warnings for this chapter: ptsd, implied abuse references, gambling addiction, vomit, implied possible alcoholism

AO3 link

Chapter 11 - Jesper

At first Jesper thought that Wylan was just avoiding him; he’d pushed too far too fast, and Wylan didn’t want to talk about it. But an entire week rolled by without a single sight of him - Jesper managed to make it to one business lecture and two biology lectures, and Wylan wasn’t in any of them. 

“We haven’t seen him all week,” said Nina in a falsely light tone as they left a biology lecture that Jesper hadn’t listened to, “I’ve just been hanging around hoping he’ll show up. Inej went to scope out the house-”

Of course she did. Saints, what did Kaz want with Wylan?

“- and she said he hasn’t left his room once, but he doesn’t seem to be ill. The staff bring him his meals and he doesn’t even talk to them,”

That was two days ago. Now Jesper was sitting at the Crow Club, eavesdropping on a conversation at the next table about a girl from the Menagerie who had gone missing two weeks ago. If there was anything about the disappearance worth knowing then Kaz probably already knew it, but it still couldn’t hurt to pick anything up and pass it on. Might make Jepser feel useful for once. He glanced down at his cards, then tossed a few more chips into the centre of the table and promptly lost. Then again, and then again. Dammit. By the time he was wandering back towards the Slat dawn was beginning, he’d lost count of how many drinks he’d ordered, and he got the fright of his life when the Wraith appeared at his shoulder.

“He dropped out,”

“Saints!” Jesper jumped away, hands flying to his revolvers before he’d had time to properly acknowledge who was there, “Inej what are you - wait, what?”

“Wylan,” said Inej softly, nodding in the direction of the Slat as they slipped out the other side of the thick crowd outside the Crow Club, “He dropped out. Nina and I are coming home,”

“What?”

“Kaz isn’t happy,” Inej breathed, “It was an expensive venture to have to cancel the job. But Kaz is never happy, and it isn’t directed at you anymore so I thought you’d want to know,”

Jesper hadn’t quite processed that part yet. Wylan was dropping out? Wylan?

“Do you know why he’s leaving?”

“No idea. The staff at the house are paid too well to bribe, and as far as listening in got me was that he hasn’t left his room or spoken a word to anyone all week. No word of him dropping out on their end, I found out from the school offices. Anyway, if you’re staying out tonight you need to be alert, Kaz and I just had a run in with the Black Tips,”

Jesper frowned, not really listening to Inej’s last sentence. Something felt off, but he couldn’t put his finger on it - and let’s be fair, he wasn’t sober enough to think it through properly. He blinked, trying to sort through his thoughts, and when he came back into focus he realised that Inej was looking up at him with that look of disappointment catching in her dark eyes. 

“You need to sleep, Jes,”

“What did Kaz want with the kid?”

She shrugged.

“Nothing he told me about. I expect it’s as simple as Van Eck has something Kaz wants, and getting close to Wylan would give us an easy way in. He probably knows some safe code or business details that Kaz wants,”

Jesper shook his head.

“Barking up the wrong tree then, anyway. Wylan isn’t set to inherit the business,”

Inej looked up at him, surprised.

“He said his stepmother’s pregnant, and her kid’ll take it once their grown,”

“His stepmother’s barely older than us, you know,” Inej shook her head, “Married six months ago; two months pregnant. Van Eck… I don’t know. He’s an unusual man. There’s a portrait of him and Alys up where there used to be one of him with Wylan’s mother and Wylan, when he was little. Apparently he had the old one burned,”

“Burned?”

Inej nodded.

“Grief is strange,” she murmured, “But there are no portraits of Wylan or his mother anywhere in the house; it’s not even like they’re being stored somewhere,”

Jesper swallowed, his mind slowly catching up to itself. 

“Where’s Nina?”

He needed to talk to her. He needed to ask her about the night she went to the Van Eck mansion. 

“I- at the university, but why-?”

“I’ve got to go,”

“What? Jesper-”

“I’ll be back!” he shouted over his shoulder, as he began to run towards the University District.

He raced back past the Crow Club and towards the canal, then followed it South until he reached the wide waterway that ran beneath the Financial District. This early there was no-one in the area to see him but he felt strangely on show anyway, moving faster than his head could keep up with in the slowly growing light. He had to stop running not long before he got to the university, his brain swimming and his feet unsteady as the dizziness and nausea of the drinks and the sudden movement finally caught up with him. He promptly threw up in the first bin he walked past, and after that there were few thoughts in his head beyond getting to anywhere he could lie down. 

“Oh Saints, Jesper,”

Inej. She had followed him. She followed everybody, somehow. Jesper was faintly amused, and very vaguely aware of Inej’s hand on his as they wandered through the slowly lightening streets of campus.

“Where’s your dorm?”

He directed her absently, and the next thing he was really aware of was stumbling into his room and Inej closing the door behind them. At some point she gave him a glass of water and not long afterwards, Jesper was asleep.

He woke up alone, not many hours later, with the headache to end all headaches and a vague memory of needing to talk to Nina about something important. He couldn’t remember what. What had he been talking to Inej about? The job was cancelled. She and Nina were going back to the Barrel. Kaz was pissed off, but at least he wasn’t pissed off at Jesper anymore. But why…? Wylan. Wylan had dropped out of university.

Jesper sighed, hunting through his wardrobe for the least creased shirt he could find and downing a glass of water before grabbing his revolvers from the desk - Inej must have taken them off him last night - and leaving the dorm room. He’d go back to the Slat, sleep off the headache, and hopefully be conscious again in time for his shift at the Crow Club. He should find Inej and apologise to her as well. But maybe that could wait until after he’d slept. He was so completely and utterly exhausted that he briefly wondered if he was imagining it when he crossed in front of one of the libraries - the one near where he had his business lectures - and saw Wylan Van Eck. 

“Wylan?”

“Jesper…” Wylan paused, then nodded vaguely towards the corner of the building.

They walked to it together, finding themselves stood half hidden in the shadows cast by the tall stone steps that lead up the library. For a moment no-one said anything. Wylan bit his lip.

“I’m not supposed to be here,” he whispered.

Jesper hesitated.

“Why are you then?”

“I… I wanted to explain. And apologise,”

“Apologise?”

Apologise for what?

“You asked me what I really want to do,” Wylan swallowed, “It’s music. I… I play the flute, but I never thought it could go anywhere - you know, if I couldn’t see the sheet music,”

“Okay…”

“But I got into the music school in Belendt, just found out. Apparently they’ve had students like me before - even for piano,” his face briefly lit up and then dropped again just as quickly, “I just… I didn’t want to just disappear without telling you,”

Oh. Jesper nodded, slowly. 

“Right,” he shrugged, “Well, thanks. Have fun, I guess,”

“Jesper-”

He turned away. He was being awful and he knew it, but he didn’t want to say anything else. Why should he? Wylan had avoided him for over a week, just to show up and tell him he was leaving - but then something struck him. Had Wylan been avoiding him?

“What do you mean that you’re not supposed to be here?” he asked, slowly turning back to face him.

He hasn’t left his room once, but he doesn’t seem to be ill.

I have to get home pretty quickly after class. My father worries.

He doesn’t even talk to them.

I just… I’m not supposed to stay out too long.

What was Wylan Van Eck doing in the library every day from eight in the morning?

And what had Inej been telling him last night? There are no portraits of Wylan or his mother anywhere in the house.

Wylan’s cheeks flooded.

“I just - I’m supposed to be staying at home,” he managed.

“Why?”

Wylan didn’t say anything for a moment. And then:

“I have to go - I’m sorry. I just wanted to say goodbye,”

“Wylan, what aren’t you telling me?”

Wylan turned around and Jesper felt an unknown panic seizing him. He grabbed Wylan’s wrist to try and pull him back, and the merchling flinched as he spun back to face him. The hand holding his cane rose to cover his face for a bare millisecond before he righted himself again, pulling away from Jesper. 

“What happened? When you got home late last week?”

“Nothing,” Wylan’s face glowed pink, highlighting the scar that stayed thin and silvery over the rush of colour, “Goodbye, Jesper,”

“Don’t go,”

“I have to, I-”

“No. Look - I have a second place, in the city. I can stay there and you can take my dorm, as long as you need it. I mean, you might want to give me an hour to clean in there but…”

“Jesper I’m going home, and then I’m going to Belendt. I’m sorry, I really just wanted to say goodbye,”

He turned to leave again and Jesper grabbed him arm - refusing to let go this time, even as Wylan tried to twist away.

“I…” he wasn’t entirely certain what his end goal was here, “I can’t let you go back,”

“Let go of me,” said Wylan, quietly.

His voice had suddenly taken on an almost dangerous quality, like something raw was tugging at the edges of his soft, calm tone, and something flashed across the cloudy blue of his eyes. Jesper was reminded briefly and almost disturbingly of Kaz. He let go.

“Wylan, you can’t go back,”

There was long pause, and then Wylan murmured:

“I’m not running away, and I’m not finding out what happens if I try to. I’m sorry, Jesper, I-”

“Please don’t apologise,”

Wylan smiled. He stepped closer and reached out slowly, hand finding Jesper’s wrist and slipping down to tightly squeeze his fingers. He smiled.

“I’m leaving tomorrow. It’s okay, Jes. I promise. I’m okay,”

Nothing was okay. 

But Wylan was walking away and Jesper didn’t know what to do to stop him. There was something going on in that house and Jesper was just standing here, watching, letting Wylan walk straight back into it. But what could he do? He couldn’t force Wylan to stay with him.

There was only one thing he could think of. It was either going to fix everything or make it all ten times worse, but that tended to be how most of Jesper’s ideas went. And he couldn’t see another option.

He was desperate. 

He went to Kaz.

[chaoticgo]

This is the big chaptered fic I’ve been working on. It’s canon divergent in that Crowley had been Archangel Jophiel before The Fall. Explains why he got all the cool jobs-tempting Eve and Jesus, delivering the Antichrist and all that. Chapter one has been up for a bit. (Is this how one promotes their own fic on tumblr? I’m not quite sure.)

Finally posted chapter 2-which is all set before The Fall and I hope, quite a laugh. I don't know how to self promote, so here's a chunk out of chapter 2:

Jophiel left wrapped up in thought, and didn’t have any particular direction to go in, so when he heard the bombastic voice of his friend, Lucifer, he flew towards it. 

“So this leads me to wonder… Why haven’t we heard from her for so long? When is the last time you heard from God, Sherequiel?” Lucifer’s tone went from rousing to gentle and imploring.

Sherequiel, a scrivener of the 167th class, standing towards the back of the gathering, glanced all around her rapidly. She bit her lower lip and tears gathered in her eyes. Finally she decided upon her answer, “I’d rather not say.”

“’I’d rather not say.’ Well said, Sherequiel! Well. Said. Wouldn’t we all rather not admit just how long it has been since we have been in the presence of her Grace? Because it feels like it reflects poorly on us, like it’s something we’ve done wrong. So no one will admit the last time She interacted with them. But it isn’t about us. None of us have done anything wrong-”

Commotion in the crowd caused some of the audience to turn to the golden yellow haze that surrounded Jophiel as he joined them. And Lucifer fell silent, sullenly waiting. 

“Excuse me. Excuse me.” Jophiel called out warmly as he made his way through the crowd, waving a greeting at angels he knew. 

Eventually Jophiel stood directly in front of Lucifer, with magenta red hair and a giddy smile.

“Lucifer! So good to see you, mate! Sorry to interrupt, please keep going!”

“Yes, well, as I was saying, She has not spoken to any of us for far too long.”

“Didn’t I just see you with Her last week?” Jophiel’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

Lucifer narrowed his eyes at Jophiel. 

“A word?” Lucifer whispered to Jophiel after he surveyed the now dwindling crowd and gave them a quick smile, “We’ll just be a moment.” He pulled Jophiel away from the other angels and enacted a sound barrier so the others couldn’t hear their conversation.

“Was I wrong? I’m sorry if I was, but you two weren’t but a hundred feet away from me.”

Lucifer cleared his throat, “Jophiel, I was trying to make a point. Just because you, or I, or the Metatron can talk with Her, doesn’t mean Sherequiel can. You have to think of Sherequiel, Jophiel!”

“I haven’t had any direct contact with Her since… Well, since we were assembled as archangels at our very beginning.” Jophiel’s brow furrowed in confusion, “And who is Sherequiel?”

“See! THIS is what I’m talking about. Sherequiel is being ignored. Sherequiel has just the same right as I do to go with God for long meandering strolls full of philosophical debates. And Sherequiel doesn’t even know it. She doesn’t even know that it’s possible! Sherequiel is bereft of God and she does not even know it.”

Jophiel stared at Lucifer for a long 15 seconds.

“Yes. Right. Well.” Jophiel cleared his throat, “I came to ask you a question. A lovely fellow,” Jophiel decided unlike with the Metatron, sharing Aziraphale’s name with Lucifer was not in anyone’s best interest, “told me today that God intends for all creation to stop in 6,000 years. And I was wondering if you knew anything about that.”

[meichenxi]

short update / hello / not dead etc

she lives!

...the reason I have not been very active here is quite simply Shame. I have been living in korea for 9 months and have not learnt ANY korean, and then I felt too embarrassed about that fact to come back to langblr. this is unfortunately proof of something I have known for a while: that my reasons and motivations for learning languages are 100% intrinsic. I can’t force it. 

not speaking korean has made my life about 90% worse. I am very capable of learning languages quickly. there are many resources available for learning korean VERSUS

‘but it’s not my special interest :((((((((’

...apparently the latter wins. so what have I been doing instead? I’ve nearly finished a 4-month daily intensive chinese course from east china normal university. haven’t done much self-studying. I put off chinese for a few months because I felt so indescribably bad about not doing korean that I ended up just doing nothing at all. 

anyway. I’m now thinking a lot about next year and yes I am planning to maybe go to taiwan and I AM applying for A Thing. (more details later if Thing happens; I know now not to jinx anything and talk about it on the blog)

but I’m also so very lonely / in need of friends so I might??? stay in the uk for a year instead??? what I want to do really changes daily. which is stupid. but I miss my family and friends, it feels like I haven’t seen anyone since the beginning of covid, which as people REMIND me is 3 years ago almost. I also very much need help for mental health stuff because in this house we spiral and I need an ahdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhd diagnosis otherwise I will never ever get anything done ever for the rest of my life, ze self hatred etc etc

so

to wit

I may be spending much more time doing german (and possibly french OR spanish) in the next year. why? because my chinese sadly is not good enough to bag me a job yet - another year of study at least - and I want to do something that involves languages SOMEHOW. which is kind of exciting and kind of fun and will be SUCH a different way of studying to the way I study chinese, which is all media-centric. 

german is definitely my best foreign language passively - though it’s been a while since I’ve spoken it actively - and I also hugely enjoy it. no big problems there. 

choosing between french and spanish however is proving difficult. pros and cons of each:

FRENCH: - passive understanding higher than spanish - better foundation - my partner speaks it very well so could practice with her - my father ALSO speaks it very well so could practice with him - ....and my friend (you get the picture) - am more likely to get to an employable level within 6 months - I Do Not Actually Like French. crucially though since I already can understand it to a passive c1 level however, it would mostly just include reactivating prior knowledge and learning new vocab, which would be Fine and would not hurt me as much as learning korean

SPANISH: - I prefer it objectively speaking over French. this is the BIGGIE. I like spanish more - my foundation is much worse, and I have spent less time with the language / generally feel more uncertain - my passive comprehension is not as high (maybe b2 if people speak at a reasonable speed?) - potential for more media - mouth feel speaking spanish good - would need to actually relearn a load of grammar things - less likely to get to an employable level in six months. 

hmm. will continue to think.

[webbywatcheshorror]

Webby Reviews Horror: Shelter/6 Souls (2010)

Shelter, also called 6 Souls for its US release, is a story about a forensic psychiatrist who takes on a new client, intending to prove his disassociative identity disorder is fake, and gets in way over her head.

That synopsis by itself does nothing to really prepare you for what actually goes on, but does the job of letting you know that the main character, played by the captivating Julianne Moore, is not the kind of psychiatrist you’d like to have. 

Before we get started I’d like to note that I do not have a thorough understanding of DiD and therefore am not equipped to touch on what are probably very glaring inaccuracies. Horror is, sadly, rife with the misinterpretation of mental illnesses in the interest of using them to frighten audiences.

With that in mind, let’s begin. Review under the cut, and as always, SPOILERS ahead!

Ever watched a movie that starts out intriguing, adds elements that really add to the suspense and mystery, only to not only fumble the ball but start running with it back in the other direction? That’s what this movie did for me.

The main character is Dr. Cara Harding (not to be confused with another Julianne Moore role, Dr. Sarah Harding), a forensic psychiatrist with a strong belief in God and a strong disbelief in certain mental diagnoses. Her father and young daughter, who I believe is 8, have lost their faith due to the fact that Cara’s husband was murdered. This is an important plot point.

Cara’s father, played by Jeffrey DeMunn, convinces her to see a new patient who, as he puts it, has quite the act, and he thinks she will find him very interesting. This is where it started to get interesting for me- she meets David, who is paralyzed from the waist down. He’s a polite young man with a Southern drawl, who answers her questions dutifully. Nothing unusual about him, until her father calls him from the office phone and asks for Adam to be put on the phone.

This causes him to shift into his Adam persona, who is a far cry from the soft spoken David in many ways- including physically, as Adam is colorblind where David was not. Oh, and Adam isn’t paralyzed, either.

Jonathan Rhys Meyers plays the different personalities incredibly well. Posture, body language, all of it- each one is distinct from the others. And there are others. Despite the narrative presenting it as DiD for a lot of the runtime, what Adam actually has going is a lot more supernatural in nature- the ‘other personalities’ are actual people who’ve died.

When Dr. Cara discovers that David was a real person, she does something I consider to be awfully cruel. She finds David’s mother, (played by the delightful Frances Conroy) a deeply religious woman, and arranges for her to meet with Adam with the intention of having her meet David. Now I’m no fancy doctor, haven’t studied psychology or anything, but it strikes me as a very poor idea to bring a woman in to meet a man who, from your perspective, has created a ‘fake persona’ where he ‘pretends’ to be her dead son. It goes about as well as you’d expect, even though David is able to tell his mom things only the two of them ever knew about.

Cara of course had not considered the consequences of her actions, because she is so focused on proving that DiD is a ‘medical fad’ and isn’t real, that things like ‘basic human decency’ and ‘what a doctor is actually supposed to do’ are cast aside. Her dad calls her out on this later, which pleased me, since she should be ashamed of herself. If I had a doctor do anything like that to me there’d be PROBLEMS.

She also takes David to the scene of his murder which results in him having flashbacks and freaking right the hell out so badly that he retreats back into himself and we get to meet an entirely new guy named Wes who is not at all pleased to be out in the woods with someone he doesn’t know. Girl maybe smother your ego a bit. Even IF David had been a personality created by Adam, bringing him to the place where the real David was murdered just seems like a dick thing to do.

Before things really ramp up, there’s a scene I really liked where Cara’s brother is combing through a video of Adam sleeping on the night another character dies (and has ended up as another one of Adam’s ‘personalities’), and is doing some Nonspecific Computer Voodoo when he makes a connection and discovers that the spooky shadowy shape in the video is in the shape of a wavelength. Which can then be played. A ghost/spirit/whatever taking the form of a sound wave is pretty fucking genius, actually, and I’m hoping the concept pops up in more stuff in the future.

Cara investigates more and finally ends up in a small village in the mountains where she finds out what the actual fuck is going on with her patient and it turns out to have been Hillbilly Hoodoo (we got a two for one special in this one, traditional and technological wizard solidarity I guess). See a long long time ago, this faith healer reverend guy tried to convince everyone that only God could keep them safe from the influenza epidemic, and he used his kids as proof, but they’d been vaccinated. When the Hillbillies found out, they kill his kids???? And then suck out his soul, which is a thing they can do, and mark his body as ‘a shelter for the faithless’.

Which causes the Reverend to become functionally immortal as it’s his body, and not Adam’s, that stores the other souls. Adam, also, is hella dead. So he’s been going around collecting the souls of people who don’t believe in God by first cursing them to have nasty boils and burns on their flesh and puking up dirt, and then just sucking that thang right outta their mouth.

And this is where it started to fall off for me. I’m not a fan of most religious angles, real or fictional, because they’re rarely written in a way that doesn’t make me wanna roll my eyes so hard they pop out my mouth, Barbara Maitland style. See, the mountainfolk confuse me- on the one hand, they punish the Reverend (and his innocent children??????) because he went against God and turned to Science for protection; they also are doing Hillbilly Hoodoo and instead allowed him to just run amok, killing as he pleased, which is fine apparently because they’re safely sheltered together in the same vessel. Like are they supposed to be doing the Lord’s work or not?

It seems to me that if you were really wanting to serve God you wouldn’t be damning people for not believing, I’m pretty sure there’s like a whole thing were their sins can be forgiven? Has to do with God’s only son? I guess technically they aren’t fully denied the opportunity to repent or whatever, since their souls are intact, but they don’t even know they’re in a new body, much less that they’re DEAD AS HELL, so I kind of doubt that’s ever gonna happen. 

But the worst part of it was when Cara’s daughter, age 8, is marked for collection, and the Hillbilly Matriarch (the Granny) tells her there’s nothing she can do BECAUSE THE CHILD LOST HER FAITH. THE CHILD. MUST DIE. BECAUSE SHE LOST HER FAITH. A child, who is barely able to comprehend what faith even actually means, is doomed to die and have her soul removed because she isn’t fully convinced that there’s a specific deity. It’s ok, says the Granny, she’ll be safe in the shelter vessel with all the other faithless souls. Cara’s safe, despite being kind of a bitch who’s definitely been responsible for the death of at least one person.

I’ll be honest, this made me so mad. The stakes are at their highest, we’re reaching climactic territory, I’m pretty invested, and then WHAM. Now I’m just annoyed and waiting for whatever bullshit ending they’ve got for me. Cara kills the cursed reverend after he absorbs her daughter’s soul (while her child is the one in control!!!!!! why not call out literally any other personality? You already know how to do it!) and the kid’s soul goes back into her body and it’s implied at least one, if not the rest, follow her there. And that’s the end.

So raising her daughter is going to be a fucking nightmare. Not only do we have Adam, David, and Wes, but we also have: an old family friend AND HER FUCKING GRANDPA, both of whom died during the events of the movie. And can be called out at any time, and presumably can just call themselves out, if the scene were Cara meets Wes is any indication. So not only did I find myself suddenly disliking this movie and whatever message it’s trying to send right when things are getting intense, but now the ending isn’t even satisfying to me.

The events of the ending are fine, decent even! In fact, if not for that bullshit reasoning, I’d probably even have liked it! Like, they could have just said that once the sheltering had begun there’s no way to stop it because it was an unstoppable process instead of ‘oops the little girl doesn’t believe in God enough. We’re done here. Die.’. I’d have been intrigued by the idea of how the kid was now the new Shelter and whether or not this meant she’d be compelled to seek out the faithless or if she’d be more of a passive collector and only take them when they died on their own. I’d have loved to know more about how the aftermath turned out with her carrying the other souls, and having to live with the trauma of knowing your mother choked you to death at one point.

But no, I’m just disappointed and feel like my time was wasted. Five ghosts outta ten for having a lot of interesting concepts and decent pacing, not to mention powerful performances, but then also having an innocent child get punished by death for not believing in a God that let her dad get murdered. Honestly I’m mad about it all over again.

[rikyos]

@yeonban sent   :   WHAT HAPPENED TO OKEMIA is she still alive... if yes what is she doing these days... did she manage to find a new job that'd keep her afloat... I'm invested I Need To Know. / unprompted.    (always accepting)

i   might   come   back   to   this   and   retcon   what   i’m   saying   since   okemia’s   whereabouts   are   kind   of   ambiguous   in   my   mind   to   be   honest     —     mostly   because   kazuha   doesn’t   really   know   himself?   and   he’s   slightly   afraid   of   finding   out.   they’ve   probably   seen   each   other   and   least   spoken   a   little   especially   in   the   days   following   the   immediate   end   to   the   civil   war   and   kazuha   being   pardoned   because   there’s   definitely   a   small   list   of   people   he   would   never   have   left   again   without   spending   some   time   with.   so   he   knows   that   she’s   ALIVE   AND   WELL   but   he’s   just.   embarrassed ,   honestly ,   that   he   doesn’t   have   the   means   to   take   good   care   of   her   when   looking   after   the   people   he   loves   is   really   the   most   important   thing   in   his   life   fdjghd.   they   haven’t   really   had   a   lot   of   deep   conversation   about  what   happened   and   he   has   no   idea   how   she   feels   about   the   way   his   own   life   turned   out   after   parting   ways.   she really is LIKE A MOTHER TO HIM and i think they way he acts about this is quite according with a disconcerted son , he's so sheepish about the topic with her , he doesn't think he can ever make that up to her. he feels the same responsibility to provide for her that an actual son would and it's disgraceful to him that he can't. he   doesn’t   avoid   her   but   he   will   feel   really   shitty   for   letting   her   down   whenever   he   does   see   her.   i   do   know   that   she’s   getting   old   and   probably   either   found   something   menial   to   do   for   a   few   years   or   would   hopefully   have   been   able   to   find   an   opportunity   as   a   retainer   for   another   notable   family.   but   she’s   likely   slowing   down   and   living   a   very   quiet   and   modest   life   at   this   point.   she   never   married   or   had   a   family   of   her   own   because   kazuha   was   eighteen   by   the   time   things   went   south ,   meaning   she   spent   the   best   part   of   twenty   years   as   a   fulltime   live   in   servant   for   them.   they   are   to   each   other   the   closest   thing   to   family   still   living.  

[mccarthawrites]

Drops of Jupiter - Chapter 6

Relationship: Howard Stark & OC!Clarabeth Davis

Rating: General Audiences

Summary: Howard takes Clarabeth out to lunch on her first day as a nurse. They discuss finding and office to start their business.

Author’s Note: It’s been so long since I updated. Also friendly reminder that Jenna Coleman is the face claim for Clarabeth

Words: 1,004

Howard had promised that on Clarabeth’s first day at the hospital, he’d treat her out to lunch. He walked into the hospital, up to the front desk.

“Hello. How can I ask you?” A redheaded nurse asked.

“Hi. Do you know where I can find Clarabeth Davis? She’s a nurse.” Howard asked.

“Do you know what floor she’s on?” The nurse asked.

“No idea.” He admitted. “It’s her first day.”

“Oh. She’s one of the new girls. Check with Molly on floor three. She’s in charge of training the new girls. She’ll know where she is.”

“Thank you.” Howard flashed her a smile before walking to the elevators. He waited, silently watching the hustle and bustle of the hospital. The elevator gate opened and Clarabeth stepped out. “Hey.” He smiled.

“Howard, hi. I thought you were going to wait outside for me.”

“Really? I thought I’d meet you inside.” He replied. Looking her over, he couldn’t fight the smile. “Never thought I’d actually see the day you wear the nurse’s uniform.” He teased.

“Don’t be a disgusting.” She rolled her eyes.

“How’s your first day going?” He offered her his arm.

“It’s been quite the morning to say the least. They’re assigning me to the maternity ward. I’ll be helping bring new life into the world.”

“You don’t sound so thrilled about that.”

“I am. I just- that’s not exactly what I pictured when I decided to become a nurse.” She admitted.

“Well, when Stark Industries becomes a reality you won’t have to work at the hospital anymore.”

“I don’t know if I want to quit this job so soon. Just until we get the company on it’s feet.”

“Means if it all goes under you’ll still have a job to fall back on.”

“Are you planning on quitting the railway?” She asked.

“Haven’t decided yet. But we can do this, right? We will do this.”

“Yes. If there is anyone I believe in, it’s you, Howard.” Her admission made him smile. “Don’t make me regret saying that out loud. Don’t let it get to your head. You’re still an idiot sometimes.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“Gotta keep you humble some way.” She laughed.

Howard and Clarabeth sat next to the window of a small deli a few blocks from the hospital.

“You know, you never told me how your date went with that son of a senator.” He told her. She sighed. “That bad?”

“Oh gosh. It was- it wasn’t a complete disaster. Just- he was exactly like all the others my mother introduces me to.”

“But I thought you said he was different.”

“Becuase I thought he was, but- we just didn’t agree on an important matter.”

“Which is-”

“Do you think a woman has to quit her career after she gets married?” She asked.

“Depends on the career.” He shrugged.

“If I got married tomorrow, should I quit my job as a nurse?”

“No.”

“If your company was up and running should I quit that?”

“No, but I don’t see you being a stay-at-home wife or mother. So- it’s different with you. Most women- that’s all they want.”

“Most women? Is this how you’re telling me you’ve slept with most women in New York City?” She asked. Howard laughed. “I don’t think that is what most women want. That’s just been the status quo forever. No one’s thought to challenge it. If Elish Graves Otis didn’t challenge anything, we wouldn’t have elevators and I would have had to climb three stories in these pumps today.”

“Fair enough. I hear what you’re saying, Clara.”

“Jack wants a meek submissive housewife.”

“Which you are not.”

“So it’s not going to work out.”

“Oh well. What about Jim. Are you still seeing him?”

“I haven’t spoken to him since our last date, but he’s busy. I understand that.”

“You know the offer is still on the table.”

“What offer?”

“We get married and split your inheritance.”

“Howard, I love you, but not like that. I will not allow my mother to win.”

“We could use that money to start the company.”

“I thought you had investors.”

“I have people who are interested, but they want me to have something to show for it before they’ll give me their money. Which is understandable.”

“Maybe you’re not whoring yourself hard enough to the lonely housewives.” She teased.

“Wow. That is not what I am doing. I am simply showing them attention their husbands don’t. And they give me gifts. Which sometimes comes in cash.”

“Howard, you’re a whore.”

“I am not.”

“You so are.” She laughed. “And I still love you.”

“I only accept this abuse from you.”

“Because you have no other choice, do you?” She asked. “My mother did say if you found an office, she’d be willing to invest.”

“I know. We have to go look at them. There is one on 52nd and one above my mother’s dress shop. I think I’ve mentioned them to you already. Maybe we can go next week to look at them.”

“Why do you need me for that?” She asked.

“I don’t know. Maybe because you’re my partner. We’ll both be working out of the office so I think it’s important we both agree on it.”

“What about Sunday? I’m working an early morning shift. I’ll be out by one.” She informed him.

“Sunday sounds good.  I’ll pick you up at one and we’ll go give it a look over. There’s also a space above a bakery on East 86th we can look into.”

“I don’t care where the office is. It’s only temporary until we get the company on its feet.”

“Yes, but as my partner I’d like your input.” He told her. “I’ll set it up so we can look at both on Sunday.”

“It’s a date.” Clarabeth smiled.

“Great! Would you be able to borrow your mother’s engagement ring? We’ll have a better chance if we look like newlyweds.” He explained, making her scoff. “What? You know I’m right.”

“I’ll see what I can do.”

[theoreticslut]

hello hello, happy sleepover! so glad I could make it 😌😂

I’d like a 💤we should be sleeping about Eddie pining after a girl for a while and then finding out she’s a single mom and how he’d be 🥺 I feel he’d be taken aback like “oh shit this is a WOMAN” and then go with it, but I wanna know what you think!

Thank you, lovely!! 🤍

i’m glad you could make it too! thank you for the ask love 💗 I absolutely adore parent fics sm!!

「 beautiful, loving, amazing woman 」

eddie munson x single parent!fem reader

requested: yes

warnings: single parenthood, pining, pet names (sweetheart & princess), brief mention of being sick

-Eddie’s been watching you for awhile

-ever since you arrived in hawkins

-he’s not sure when exactly you moved in

-but it’s only been a couple months at most

-the first time he really sees you is when you’re leaving family video as he heads in

-he had only wanted a few movies for the night

-but seeing you was infinitely better

-even if you haven’t spoken to each other yet

-he’d seen you around town for a few weeks now

-at the grocery store or the mechanic

-& every time he can’t help but admire you

-of course steve had to pull his leg for liking the cute new girl

-“you sure know how to pick ‘em, munson.”

-“what d’ya mean, harrington? Don’t you find her attractive? Or are you just that bad at picking ‘em?”

-although he never would have expected to be friends with “the hair”

-Eddie has to admit they get along quite well

-probably helps that they share dustin-responsibilities

-“oh no, I think she’s beautiful, but she just got two children’s movies.”

-“oh yeah?”

-this obviously piques Eddie’s interest

-but it doesn’t quell his curiosity any

-if anything it makes him want to know more

-“yeah, said she’s got a kid around.”

-at that all Eddie can do is nod

-it’s not abnormal for someone around their age to have kids around

-he figures you babysit for people around town or you have a younger niece/nephew

-it doesn’t surprise him any

-which is why he keeps watching you

-it’s about a week and a half later that he finally gets to talk to you

-you’re working a few shifts a week at the local diner while your best friend watches your daughter

-as much as you hate being away from her you need the money

-you only have so much saved up between the two years you worked in highschool & the telephone salesperson job you held for a year and a half

-not to mention you only get so much child support from your daughters father

-money isn’t a huge concern when your daughter’s paternal grandparents are more than willing to help support you

-but you feel better being able to provide for her on your own

-which is why you continue to work a part time job here in hawkins

-you’re nearly done with your shift when this long, curly-haired brunette comes in and sits at the counter

-it’s hard not to be drawn to him

-between his hair and how he dresses

-denim and leather with silver chains adorning him

-there’s no denying that he’s beautiful

-but you’re also not really looking for anyone right now

-you’ve got your daughter to focus on

-when he starts talking with you though, you lose it

-“you’re new in town, right?” He questions

-a kind smile on his lips as he does

-“Mhm. Been here just over two months now.”

-you try so hard to just stay friendly

-to not let your heart take over your emotions regarding him

-he’s just a customer

-nothing more

-all it takes is one little offer though before you break

-“maybe I could show you more of the town sometime? I mean, I have lived here most of my life.”

-it’s hard to turn down his offer

-especially when he’s looking at you with wide, hopeful eyes and a smile that makes your heart skip a beat

-so you go out with him

-& then you go out again

-he just can’t get enough of you

-each time you hang out or talk he’s falling a little more for you

-& you are for him

-but he can’t help but wonder why you’re so hesitant to let him come over or vice versa

-it’s not until he shows up at your door that he realizes why

-you had told him over the phone earlier that you were sick

-so he figured he’d surprise you with some soup and movies

-just to keep you company

-& hopefully to comfort you a little

-he never expected you to answer the door with a toddler on your hip though

-“eddie, hey. Uh, what’re you…what’re you doing here? I told you I was sick.”

-“I know. I thought I’d bring you some soup and movies. Figured you might not want to be alone,”

-“…but, uh, I see you’ve already got someone.” He chuckles, fascinated with the kid

-he’s never had little kids in his life

-not when it’s always been him and his uncle

-“mommy?” your daughter asks, confused, as she looks up at you

-that single word has eddie doing a double take as his jaw drops

-you’re a mom?

-you don’t just have a kid around, you have a kid

-holy shit

-holy fucking shit

-you’re not just a woman, you’re a woman

-you have a kid that you’re raising on your own

-although shocking, eddie can’t help but be awed by the news

-he can’t lie and say you don’t look good with a child on your hip

-“yeah…this, this is my daughter.”

-Eddie nods, eyes wide, yet smiles all the same

-“hi. Nice to meet you, princess. You been taking care of your mom?”

-it’s your turn to be shocked

-you never expected him to be so cool about you having a kid

-not when you’re 21 with a two and half year old

-“you’re not…freaked out?”

-as you question him you’re letting him into the house

-not wanting him or the soup he’s brought to get cold in the November air

-“no? Why would I be?”

-in his mind, there’s no reason to be

-you have a kid, sure, but that’s no reason for him to be uncomfortable

-“I just, guys usually…”

-you’re not sure how to word your thoughts

-you & Eddie aren’t together

-as far as you know he only sees you as a friend

-so maybe you having a kid doesn’t worry him bc he doesn’t want to be with you to begin with

-“what? They don’t want to date someone with a kid?”

-“well…yeah” you deadpan, brows furrowed as his lack of concern

-“not me, sweetheart. I think it’s pretty metal that you have a daughter.”

-“really?”

-“Mhm. If I haven’t made it obvious by now, I kind of really like you, which means I want every part of you. Child included, sweetheart.”

-he won’t admit it to you yet, but Eddie can already see himself helping you to raise the little one

-& if things keep going well

-he can see himself giving you another one

-and maybe another

-he likes the idea of having a family with you

-even if you are just in the beginning stages of a relationship together

-but he already knows he’s done for if you feel the same as him

-you’re absolutely amazing

-an absolutely beautiful, loving, amazing woman

-& he doesn’t want it any other way

———————————————————————

pls like & reblog if you enjoyed!

join my taglist.

[halloweenbitch2764]

I can request a scenario in which the reader is rescued by the police or by someone who cares about her and thinks she is saving from the Slachers (Brahms, Jason, Michael, Vincent, Bo and another killer of her choice).

What would happen next, would the Slachers go after their reader and bring them home with them? Would the Slachers cause a massacre with people who cross your path, perhaps?

((Note: S / O is not a victim or hostage of the Slashers, but his girlfriend)).

Absolutely! Thank you for the request and patience! I think family/friends will work better in these situations so I hope you don't mind! Also I'm gonna skip Michael because I can't come up with anything for him and the other scenarios are super long. I hope it makes up for it <3

TW: Violence

F/N: Friends Name

Brahms Heelshire

It had definitely taken some getting used to when it came to living with Brahms

Between the HUGE mansion and the man himself

But you adapted into the role and settled in relatively well

However, you dropped contact with outside people quite suddenly

The cell reception had became increasingly worse and the landline phone had finally given out

When you tried to leave Brahms would insist on you staying

Which left your brother quite worried (pretend if you don't have one)

After multiple failed call attempts he decided to visit the address you had given him after accepting the job

He continued to try and call once he landed

Sure he'd be annoyed if you answered but would be happy you even did

However you didn't

So he made his way out to the mansion and parked in front of you

You were busy doing some cleaning and hadn't heard the car door slam shut

Brahms did though

A knock rang from the front door and you answered it, seeing your brother in front of you

You were confused and questioned why he was there

"You haven't been answering ANY of my calls. What the hell happened?" He seemed more concerned than angry

You knew Brahms would have heard him by now and one major rule was "no visitors"

Your stomach dropped

"Oh, um. The cell reception here is garbage and I haven't had time to get a new landline." You partially lied

"Well I'm glad you're safe. Mom wanted me to stay for a few days if that would be alright. I hate to invite myself but you know how mom is."

Your stomach sank further

"U-Uh actually, I'm not allowed to have visitors stay. Really not supposed to have anyone stay at all."

He raised his eyebrow. "Aren't you just watching some doll? Come on, Y/N you gotta be lonely. This place seems huge."

"Just go back home and tell mom I'm fine. I'm gonna be here till my job is done. Okay?" You wanted to make him leave without worrying him or him seeing Brahms

However, you noticed his eyes shift behind you and then widen

Oh fuck

"Go. Home." You told him but he didn't have to be told twice, already halfway to his car

You turned around to see Brahms behind you and you figured his size was enough to scare your brother

You just hoped he wouldn't tell your mom what really happened

Jason Voorhees

You had been at Camp Crystal Lake with Jason for quite a bit before anyone came to see if you were there

Cell reception was basically nonexistent so you hadn't had contact with the world since you had decided to stay with Jason

Your sister (pretend if you don't have one) remembered how much you loved Crystal Lake though and wondered if maybe you had ran away to the abandoned and dilapidated cabins

You were just taking a walk when your heard a female voice screaming your name

You instantly knew who's voice it was

You hoped Jason hadn't heard, scared of what he would do to her for trespassing

You ran towards the voice and you thought your sister was going to faint when she saw you coming towards her

"Y/N?" She almost didn't seem to believe you were right in front of her

"Hey dork, what's up?" You asked, trying to seem casual

"What's up?" She seemed stunned and then angry. "What do you mean 'what's up'?! You ran away and then just act as if nothing happened?!"

"Hey keep it down. Look, I'm sorry. I just was tired of everything and decided to see if I could stick it out here by myself for a while. I'm trying to renovate an old cabin to make a sort of house and I don't want ANYONE knowing where I am." The whole story was pretty much a lie. "I was just so overwhelmed with everything I needed a getaway. Don't tell anyone where I am. Please?"

She was silent as she processed everything. "What about Jason? Isn't he supposed to kill anyone who lives here or roams here?" She was almost positive the whole story of Jason wasn't real but she was still curious

"Well I mean. I'm still intact so I'm gonna say he doesn't exist." You lied.

She nodded a bit. "I've just been so worried about you. Just...try and let me know you're okay ever so often. Alright?"

You nodded and she headed back for her car

Once she was out of sight you started to head back to the cabin only to bump into Jason's chest

You jumped slightly in surprise, not having heard him sneak up and explained that she was your sister

He nodded before bringing you back to the cabin

Vincent Sinclair

You were sitting silently in the woods with Vincent as a victim made their way into the small town, pulling into the gas station

You were fairly far away and hidden by the foliage but you recognized who stepped out of the car

He had papers in his hand with large red letters spelling "MISSING" on the top and your face under it

It was your friend

Well he thought of himself as your friend

You didn't mind him but he would act obsessive towards you, wanting to hang out as much as possible and even interjecting himself into conversations you were having

You knew he had good intentions but couldn't help but feel annoyed just by his presence

He walked into the gas station, likely to ask about you

You knew what would happen

Vincent seemed to notice how closely you looked at the guy

It was different from past victims

"Who's that?" He signed

"An old...friend of mine. Well, he thought we were friends. He got on my nerves." You signed back

Vincent nodded a bit as you continued, "He had a thing for me I think. He was obsessed to say the least."

Jealousy started to come over him at what you said even though he knew you didn't return the feelings

He'd make sure he wasn't made into a wax figure

Just tortured and then disposed of

Bo Sinclair

You leaned against the gas station counter as Bo worked in the garage as per usual

You were fairly sure it would just be another normal day

Nobody coming to bother you

However a car pulled up and parked by a gas pump, shutting off as someone stepped out

No

No it couldn't be

Your old friend

You hadn't spoken to her in years

She still looked the same

You didn't know if you hoped she wouldn't recognize you or that she would

She pushed her sunglasses to the top of her head as she pushed the door opened but stopped in her tracks as her eyes scanned your face

"Y/N?"

You reluctantly nodded and stood up, walking out from behind the counter

Tears welled up in her eyes as she pulled you into a hug to which you returned

"I-I can't believe this. We all thought you were dead!" Emotions swirled rapidly through her voice. Pain, excitement, nostalgia

"What?" You asked, confused

"I've missed you so much." She held you by your shoulders. "I didn't even mean to come here. I made a wrong turn and then was gonna come ask for directions."

Well that sounded oddly familiar

"Well I'm glad to see you. I'm alright. Just uh, decided to live here. I like how secluded it is." She turned to look at the side door to the garage as it was pushed open and Bo entered the room.

"Well hello there." He said in his normal charming accent, greeting your friend and seeing her as a victim. "Who might you be?"

"Oh this is F/N, she's been friends with me since we were in school."

He nodded a bit and she raised her eyebrow. "Well who's this Y/N?" She smirked

"This is Bo. He's my boyfriend. He works in the mechanics shop." You told her

She nodded and smiled.

"Well have a look around if you want any snacks. I gotta help Bo with something in the garage." You lied, tugging him into the garage and shutting the door behind you

"Do NOT hurt her." You sternly said and he raised his eyebrow

"I can't risk her telling people about this town." He responded.

"She doesn't even know what this town is. I think she missed the sign." You told him and he sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose

"She could be lying."

You shook your head. "She won't tell anyone."

You walked back out and smiled at her, taking her money to pay for her snack

"You didn't see me okay?" She raised her eyebrow

"Some things happened that I don't want to get into right now but I can't go back for a while. Just let them think I'm dead and move on. Okay?" She nodded after a moment

"Have a safe trip." You said sweetly, giving her one last hug before she left

[kiyosamu]

remember.

----♡----

pairing: rintaro suna x female reader.

genre: yandere, dark, light romance. // one shot, 4k words.

synopsis: abusive relationships can seem impossible to leave. when you open up to a classmate, your life takes a dramatic turn in the best and worst ways imaginable.

content warnings: assault, domestic abuse (not from suna), descriptions of violence, yandere themes.

----♡----

“hey, kid.” suna’s voice caught your attention as you passed by him in the university corridor. he was quiet, only speaking loud enough for you to hear right as you were walking by.

“hey, rintaro.” you stopped for a moment, refusing to look up at the tall man towering over you.

“i haven’t seen you in a while. everything okay?” he leaned against the wall and clutched a textbook to his chest. “you haven’t even been to class. kinda been missing my project partner.”

“you got my work though, right?” you asked him, partially covering your face with your hair. “i emailed it to you.”

“i did.”

“okay… good.” you cleared your throat, awkwardly shuffling and offering a suspiciously sudden goodbye.

“hey, wait-" suna grabbed your wrist to keep you from leaving. the small amount of pressure more than enough on your deep bruise to make you wince.

suna noticed your pained expression and immediately let go, stepping back.

“i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to hurt you. i just wanted to ask you if-“

“it’s okay!” you interrupted, knowing you’d already spoken to him for too long. you needed to get out of there before anyone noticed. “you didn’t hurt me. sorry, i have to go. bye!”

your behaviour was erratic. your speech was rushed; forced and strained with every word as you tried your best to appear normal.

unfortunately it was much harder to pretend everything was okay than you’d originally thought it’d be.

you quickly turned and headed down the hallway to drop off the assignments to your other professor. the last one you’d have to see for the day before heading home. you were almost there. so close you might not even run into him.

you’d hoped, anyway.

----♡----

after seeing your professor, you walked out into the fresh evening air. the cold stinging your cheeks and the wind pushing your hair out of your face.

your cheeks burned from the freezing air, but it was your black eye was that hurt the most.

“i’m sorry, i just lost my temper.” his words echoed in your head, “you shouldn’t have pissed me off.”

you nodded, essentially agreeing with him. it’s true, if he didn’t get mad, he wouldn’t have hit you. and why was he mad? because of something you did. so really, it was your own fault.

you were the one apologizing to him that night. doing anything you could to make it up to him. all of this with a deep purple bruise forming on your face.

when he finally left your dorm and went back to his, you were mentally exhausted. you fell asleep and woke up right before your second class of the day.

he had started forcing you to miss classes, to do everything at home and only go in to submit your work. this was for two reasons.

the first, you could spend more time with him due to your schedules. if yours was freed then you’d have more time together.

the second was to stop you from talking to other men. completely.

...and then he found out suna was your lab partner.

“i don’t want you working with him.”

“i have to. the professor is the one who chooses.”

“then work from home and submit the stuff online. that guy is a manipulator. he’s dangerous and will take advantage of you. i just know it.”

you’d never gotten that type of vibe from suna, but you obeyed your boyfriend because you didn’t want to know what would happen if you didn’t.

secretly, though, you missed class. you missed working with him. laughing, getting to know each other. he’d become a good friend over the past year and since you had the same majors, you two shared quite a few classes.

he was calm. funny and quiet, but definitely not timid. his energy made him come off tough, but not scary. if anything, he made you feel… safe.

just for those few hours you had together.

and whenever class would end, you found yourself missing that feeling.

----♡----

“i have to go to class tomorrow.” you said, refusing to make eye contact with your boyfriend who’d invited himself over to your dorm.

just like he does every. single. night.

“why? you gonna go talk to that suna guy?” he approached you, giving you a terrifying smile that you know wasn’t coming from a place of happiness.

“yuji… please.” your words were barely a whisper when you felt his fingers wrap around your throat. “my professor told me i need to start going. my grades are falling behind.”

his fingers tapped rhythmically against your skin. dancing skillfully as he toyed with the idea of choking you. you held your breath, expecting the worst.

“you should try harder.” he growled, digging his fingertips into your neck and you clenched your eyes closed. “get your grades back up so you don’t have to spend any more time with that guy.”

“okay, okay!” you grabbed onto his wrist and his eyes widened. “i will! i’ll get my grades up so i don’t need to see him anymore.”

“good girl.” he smiled, the evil expression he’d previously worn had melted away into a false image of a kind man. “always listening so well for me.”

yuji leaned in and kissed you. you kissed back, barely, but just enough for him to be satisfied and leave you alone.

“time for me to go.” he sighed as he heard the dorm advisor do a final walk through to knock on the doors and let the students know it was time for guests to leave.

“see you tomorrow?” he asked, tilting your chin up to look at him.

“sure…” you whispered. you trembled under his touch and wanted nothing more than for him to leave your sight.

“good. it’s a date.” he said happily and gave you another kiss, practically skipping down the hallway back to his own room.

you shut and locked your door, desperately wishing that was the last time you’d ever have to see him.

----♡----

“well, well, well.” suna cooed as you took your seat next to him. “as i live and breathe, i never thought i’d see the day. you finally made it to class.”

you nodded and pulled out your books.

“had to. my grades are slipping.” you sighed, looking around at the science classroom. “what are we doing today?”

“lab day.” suna said as he nudged an instruction sheet towards you. “should we put on our coats and get to it?”

“okay...”

you started to have an internal panic attack. your wrists were as bruised as the black eye you were hiding behind your hair.

suna stepped away to get your lab coats.

this would all be visible, and you didn’t want suna (or anyone) to see any of it.

you nervously approached your professor and she looked up at you with a disinterested stare.

“ma’am, i need to be excused from class today.”

“absolutely not.” she scoffed, “unless you want to fail my class, which i know you can’t afford to do, you’ll stay and do your lab.”

you opened your mouth to reply but she kept speaking.

“go put up your hair, roll up your sleeves and get your lab coat on. you should be thankful you have such a competent partner.” she crossed her arms, leaning back in her chair, “actually, i think the two of you should spend some time together. he’s my top student and you definitely need some tutoring.”

“i don’t think that’s necessary-“

“mr. suna, come up here please.”

suna walked up with a confused look, unsure as to why he was being brought in to the conversation.

“something i can help with?” he asked.

“yes,” the professor smiled, “i’d like the two of you to do tutoring sessions a minimum of twice a week, an hour each time. could you do that?”

“oh, sure. i don’t mind.” he smiled, “was that all? we should get to our assignment.”

you felt backed in to a wall. of course you were okay with this, you enjoyed spending time with suna.

unfortunately, you were terrified of the repercussions.

even worse, there was nothing you could do about it.

when you got back to your table, you put your hair up and silently thought of a plan. keep your head down, don’t make eye contact. maybe he wouldn’t notice.

you rolled up your sleeves and put on your white coat. it was barely long enough to hit your wrists, but did a decent job of hiding the bruises.

the first half of the lab went well. suna explained things in a way that made it easy to comprehend and you were genuinely enjoying yourself.

until you completely forgot.

you began to pour the green liquid into the tube. suna was writing his lab report when he looked up and noticed your mistake.

“oh, hey,” he stood up, putting his hand over yours to tilt the container back up. “you need to pour it slower, like this.”

when it started to pour just as he’d wanted, he let go and you found yourself missing the brief comfort of his touch.

“good job! you did it.” suna smiled and you looked up at him with an excited expression. finally. finally you were getting something right.

when the two of you made eye contact, his smile immediately dropped into a look of concern.

“what happened to your eye?”

“oh,” you stepped back, covering it with your hand. “i fell.”

suna carefully held onto your wrist and you winced in pain. his intentions were to move your hand away from your eye, but he took immediate notice of your reaction and pushed your sleeve down.

the bruises in the shape of fingerprints stained your skin a deep purple.

“what about here?” he stepped closer. you tried to read his expression but he looked completely emotionless.

“from the same fall, i’m just clumsy.”

“and your neck?”

suna pushed back your lab coat to see the same fingerprint bruises scattered around your neck.

you were suddenly thankful you’d chosen the table in the far back end of the classroom. nobody was ever watching.

“yeah.” you said, practically a whisper. “i’m just really clumsy.”

suna leaned down and looked into your eyes.

“why don’t i believe you?”

“five more minutes!” the professor called, interrupting your intense conversation and the two of you snapped back into action.

you finished your lab report and quickly packed up your stuff before rushing out the classroom door.

suna followed closely behind.

“it’s your boyfriend, isn’t it?”

you stopped dead in your tracks and turned around to look at him. suna’s expression was no longer emotionless. he was angry.

“okay,” you sighed, grabbing his wrist to pull him to a secluded space outside. the two of you sat down under a large tree, away from everyone else.

“yuji gets upset with me and… hurts me… sometimes.” you choked out. “i haven’t told anyone because i’m scared of what he’ll do to me. i haven’t left him because i’m scared of him. i’m stuck.”

you hadn’t said these words out loud to anyone, ever, and the way they were flowing so freely had you crying before you were even aware of it.

“please don’t tell anyo-“

“i’ll take care of it.”

you looked up at him. suna looked completely calm, his voice smooth and gaze held on you.

“what do you mean?”

suna stood up and ran his hands through his hair.

“i mean i’ll take care of it.” he smiled, “see you tomorrow afternoon for tutoring?”

“wait, suna-“

“later!” he gave you a passive wave before walking back towards the university building.

----♡----

that evening you waited for yuji to come by your dorm, but he never did.

you waited for him to call you, but he didn’t.

you worried about what suna had meant. maybe he was going to talk to him, maybe even threaten him. you’d hoped he wouldn’t do that, but you really didn’t know what he was capable of.

surely the rumours about him couldn’t be true. an honour's chemistry major being involved in a more sinister, underground group that nobody even knew if it was real or made up?

he was too nice. there was no way.

----♡----

after class you headed back to your dorm to get ready for your evening. suna had asked you to meet him under the same tree from the day before. around 7pm.

you debated on calling yuji, but ultimately decided against it. maybe he’d come to his senses. maybe he was remorseful, and just wanted to move on. to leave you alone and pretend your relationship never happened.

that was what you wished for the most.

----♡----

you stepped out into the cold evening air. the wind blowing softly and brushing the hair out of your face.

you clutched your books to your chest and took a short cut through the back fields separating the dorms from the main university campus.

you checked your phone, you were early. suna would be there in about 15 minutes.

you reached down to grab your phone when it was immediately snatched from your hands.

“you did this, didn’t you?” a familiar voice snapped at you. you glanced up to see yuji, sporting a similar black eye and a bandaged cut on his cheek.

“i- no, of course not!”

he rolled his eyes at your reply, clearly not willing to listen to a word you were saying. yuji grabbed your wrists, forcing you to drop your books and pushed you against the back wall of the university.

“you did. tell me right now. everything you said. who you said it to. and why.” the look in his eyes was horrifying. scarier than any other look he’s given you before.

this made it seem like his previous bouts of anger were nothing but minor inconveniences.

“i didn’t-“

yuji pulled back, immediately hitting your chin with a hard punch that knocked your head back into the concrete wall.

“try again.”

your vision was hazy. mind blurring memories together and you couldn’t even form a proper sentence.

you felt a warm, wet sensation cascading down the back of your neck and were immediately soothed by the feeling. the warmth was comfortable, even though you didn’t know what it was from.

yuji’s hand wrapped around your throat and he pressed his forehead to yours. his fingers dug roughly into your windpipe, causing you to choke out the remaining air in your lungs. you felt yourself get sleepy, closing your eyes and letting darkness overtake you as your body went limp.

----♡----

“hey, wake up.”

snapping fingers in your face had you looking around curiously. you couldn’t focus on your surroundings. it was unclear who was with you, unclear what was happening around you, and unclear why you were there.

the sounds of multiple men. grunting, panting. speaking quietly between deep breaths and harsh exertion.

what were they doing?

“hey.” the fingers snapped in front of your face again.

“what…” was all you could manage to say. your body felt heavy. weak. you were just so tired. all you wanted to do was fall asleep. you submitted to the exhaustion, closing your eyes again.

“don’t go to sleep.” a soothing voice lifted the back of your neck, pressing something soft against your head. “stay awake and listen to me.”

��ya like beatin’ up girls, huh?”

whack

“wanna put a girl half your size in the hospital, for what? to feel like more of a man?”

whack

“a real man would never hit a woman.”

whack

“a real man would beat the shit out of losers who do hit women, right ‘tsum?”

“right. maybe we’ll even put him in the hospital.”

whack

whack

“oh, he’s gonna be there once we’re done.”

you finally recognized the last voice. it was suna.

he spoke again, his voice raspy and dark but still audible from where you were.

“i hope to fucking god you didn’t hurt her so badly that she’s knocked out…” suna trailed off and let out a small chuckle. “because there’s nothing i want more than for her to hear you cry like a little bitch when this blade goes right…”

the sound of yuji’s sudden scream was immediately muffled by what you were sure was the hand of the other man.

“…through you.”

your eyes widened and you were starting to understand what was happening.

all you could feel around you was danger.

you started to hyperventilate. panic was taking over.

“focus on me. come on, we need to get out of here.”

“who…” your head started to hurt now. badly.

“my name is osamu.” he bent down and cradled you in his arms, bringing you close to his chest and picking you up bridal style. “hold on to me if you can.”

“i’m scared…” you whispered.

“i know.” he murmured, carrying you away from the scene and back through the field. “i’ll keep you safe. we need to go to the hospital.”

“what about…”

“the only thing you need to worry about is stayin’ awake right now, okay? it’ll all be okay.” osamu’s voice was soothing. his body was warm and his strong arms supported your body in a way that made you never want to leave his hold.

you gave him a weak nod. even if you wanted to get away, you couldn’t. so you decided to trust in this man and hope for the best.

----♡----

“hey, sweetheart.” the calm voice of a nurse slowly woke you up. “you’re finally awake.”

“where…” you choked out, your throat was dry and you could barely make out where you were. it was all so… confusing.

“you’re in the hospital.” she said as she stood on her tiptoes to change the fluids on your iv pole. “you were assaulted. your injuries aren’t good but you’ll make a full recovery.”

the nurse leaned back down and held onto your hand. “you have a real knight in shining armour, you know. your boyfriend hasn’t left your side since you were admitted. he’s going to be so happy when he finds out you woke up.”

boyfriend?

your heart started to race at the thought of yuji coming in. you looked around, preparing for the worst when you heard footsteps enter the room.

“hey, sleepyhead.”

“speak of the devil.” the nurse smiled, giving your hand a squeeze. “i’ll let you two have some privacy. please press the call button if you need anything, i’ll come back and check on you soon.”

the footsteps grew closer and you heard the squeak of a chair being pulled up next to your bed. you opened your eyes to see suna giving you a compassionate smile.

“rintaro?” you whispered, “what are you doing here?”

“making sure you’re okay.” he crossed his arms, “been here since you were admitted.”

you tried your hardest to remember even coming to the hospital, but you just couldn’t. everything was gone after your head hit that wall.

“what… happened?” you asked, your eyes pleading for him to be honest.

“someone attacked you and your boyfriend.” suna leaned in, “do you not remember anything?”

“i remember yuji being upset with me…” you blinked, your mind working as hard as it could to remember something of importance. “my head hit the wall and it’s kind of fuzzy after that.”

“i see.” suna nodded.

“wait, how did you know i was in here?”

“some people mentioned an attack on campus. i got worried when you were late for our study session, and when your phone rang and you didn’t answer i felt like something was up.” he shrugged, taking a moment to think of his next words. “i called the hospital and asked if you were here, and then came right over when they confirmed it.”

“oh. okay…” you went to scratch an itch on your scalp and were met with searing pain at the slightest bit of pressure. “ow!”

“careful.” he smiled, taking your hand away from your head. “it’s gonna be sore for a while.”

“yeah…” you trailed off, trying to make sense of the situation. “what happened to yuji?”

“why do you care?”

“huh?” you glanced at suna who’s expression had turned sour.

“why do you care about what happened to him? he could've killed you.”

“i just wanted to know if he…” your voice was shaky and you tried to compose yourself. “if there was a possibility of him coming after me again.”

“not a single chance.” suna leaned over the railing of the hospital bed and took your hand. “besides, even if there was, i won’t let anything happen to you.”

----♡----

you’d found out yuji had suffered from severe injuries almost taking his life. he was beaten, stabbed, and his spinal cord suffered so much damage he was permanently paralyzed from the waist down.

while you were relieved the abuse would be over, you constantly wondered who had assaulted him.

you remembered telling suna and him saying he’d take care of it, surely that wasn’t him, right? there was no way suna could do something like that.

----♡----

months went by while you recovered from your injuries. you’d been discharged from the hospital after 3 weeks, and suna had stuck by your side every day.

“i’m happy to say you’ve essentially made a full recovery.” the doctor smiled, shaking your hand. “i’m so proud of your progress. you’re truly a walking miracle.”

“what about my memory?” you asked, “when will i remember what happened?”

“oh, you might not ever remember. you hit your head hard and from what we gather, you were unconscious.” the doctor stood up, clutching his clip board before walking out. “it’s probably for the best that you don’t remember what happened. you should focus on moving on, now. take care.”

----♡----

“well, should we celebrate?” suna asked as you walked out of the hospital together. you stopped, causing him to turn and look down at you. “what’s up?”

“i just wanted to say thank you…” you said, feeling your face getting hot. “i don’t think i could’ve done this without you.”

“you could’ve. you’re the strongest person i’ve ever met.” he leaned down, brushing the hair out of your face. the same hair that used to cover the deep bruises, now showing your true complexion. “and the most beautiful.”

you felt your heart flutter at his sudden compliment. suna’s hands found your waist and you instinctively draped your arms over his shoulders.

“you really mean that?” you asked, looking into his eyes.

“of course i do.” he smiled, leaning in to give you the long awaited kiss the two of you had been dying for. his lips were soft and you melted into his arms. he pulled away, resting his forehead on yours. “beautiful in every possible way.”

you felt tears well up as you were being complimented. the sweetest, kindest, most handsome man touching you so delicately and speaking to you with nothing but respect.

you'd completely fallen in love with him, and it was everything you ever could’ve asked for.

----♡----

a few weeks after the two of you made it official, your honeymoon phase was in full force. you couldn’t keep your hands off of each other. you were experiencing your first true relationship that made you feel loved and you cherished at every moment.

one evening, you decided to go to suna’s dorm to surprise him.

knock knock

“rintaro?” you called out, opening the door to let yourself in. “are you home?”

“in here, baby.” he replied from the kitchen. he was sharing an apartment style dorm with two other men, but you hadn’t met them yet. they weren’t ever there when you were.

“we finally get to meet your girl, huh?” one of them cooed as you walked in. he had dyed blonde hair and smirked at you as you walked by. “damn, she’s a looker, huh ‘samu?”

samu… why did that sound familiar?

“don’t be such a pig.” the other boy replied. you realized they were twins when he stood up and walked over to you. he smiled, holding out his hand. “nice to meet ya, i’m osamu.”

osamu.

no.

“my name is osamu…”

it couldn’t be.

“…hold on to me if you can.”

no, no, no.

the memories of the night of the assault came flooding back to you.

it only took a moment to realize...

...it wasn’t a random assault at all.

[eyrieofsynapses]

Redemption Panel Highlights and Reactions

GATORS

i.e., Beth Riesgraf and Christian Kane (mostly Beth) talking about filming the scenes in (what I presume is) The Rollin’ on the River Job, where they’re pulling some stuff out of the water, and finding out the next day that there was an absolutely massive alligator pulled out of the same place just a little while after they filmed it

Beth’s impression of the wildlife folks warning them about the alligators

Beth scaring the hell out of Noah Wyle by yelling “GATOR” at him just after he finished his scene

seriously that was an absolutely WILD part of the panel

Everyone showering Aleyse Shannon with literally all the love!

Aldis Hodge in particular big-brothering her, and also the older actors calling her out for not giving herself enough credit, and Dean Devlin talking about how she blew him away at the auditions with her ability to turn on a dime

Seeing Kane with his glasses off wiping at his eyes, momentarily thinking “you okay dude?” and then realizing that he was laughing so hard he had tears in his eyes

(same)

The The Bucket Job clip! I’ve been a bit meh on a lot of Redemption, just in how it didn’t feel quite right, but that is possibly the absolute closest I’ve seen it get to the original in the best way. Brilliant

Which comes as no surprise since BETH RIESGRAF directed the episode!!! And apparently put an insane amount of effort in!

Beth’s utter delight and joy at both directing the episode and having the crew behind her

THE CHAIR

So apparently she and Christian went to town on the fight scene and he winds up tied up in a chair somewhere along the line and there’s a whole wild scene, which I am really looking forward to

Beth knowing how insanely particular he’d be about things like zip ties vs rope and what kind of rope e.t.c. e.t.c.

Apparently this is also tied into a VERY DEEP scene with Eliot? It sounds like they’re going to go super hard on his backstory, which is terrifyingly exciting

Just. Beth and Christian going very hard on that episode together

Speaking of: the panel’s going amazingly, I’m laughing so hard my stomach hurts, things are relatively light, and then, of fucking course—

Kane hitting us over the head about Eliot being a mass murderer who can’t be redeemed, is trying to stay static so that he can maintain the place he’s in, and is thus LIVING VICARIOUSLY THROUGH HARRY

What the FUCK. This is of course incredibly insightful and perfectly on point (because it’s Kane) but also, EXCUSE ME, OUCH, why would you DO THAT to us?

Everyone talking about having their families on set and their kids!

Beth’s son growing up on the original Leverage set and now going into being a director himself!

Gina’s daughter also growing up on set!

Noah Wyle’s daughter is playing Harry’s daughter I REPEAT NOAH WYLE’S ACTUAL DAUGHTER IS PLAYING AS HARRY’S DAUGHTER

Gina Bellman remaining relatively stoic throughout much of the panel (seriously, this woman, how the heck does she do it) and then losing it when they’re asked about running/inside jokes

A lot of them are, of course, apparently not appropriate to be spoken on-panel

(A lot of the others are the little inside ones that are special enough not to be ones they want to share, which is sweet!)

Everyone collectively losing it over having LeVar Burton on for The Bucket Job

Devlin and everyone laughing about collecting the various Star Trek people on Leverage

Beth talking about Burton coming over while she’s getting ready and asking her if she’s living on coffee and water, her laughing because he was absolutely right, and then him gently reminding her to remember to eat, which is the sweetest thing in the world oh my gods

Kane apparently choreographing an intense scene with Burton and being scared out of his mind, because Burton really wanted to go for it, but to Kane it was like he’s a figurine that’s not to be messed with because he was so worried about hurting him

Kane choreographing a massive amount of the show, which I knew already, but seriously, this guy blows me away

Gina and the crew talking about how he’d be away for a day of shooting a fight and all of them would be missing him and thinking about him

Family Vibes

Everyone talking about how they’re very noisy and loud together on set and it’s a bit like walking into a group of people having Christmas dinner (or something to that effect) because they’re just Like That together

Aleyse being the most surprised by Beth when she met her because she was like a little angel of light during the auditions but turned out to be an absolute ball of wild energy on set

Gina going “wait you were a MODEL” at Beth

Aldis talking about how much he loved how Parker and Hardison’s relationship had developed and grown!

Also, Aldis apologizing when the New York (iirc) background noise got loud and everyone going “no no we get you”

His outfit is ON POINT today

Gina saying that Christian is the goofiest and wildest out of them in terms of humor

(she goes “some of you may not know this,” which, fair, but also, if you’ve seen more than ten minutes of this guy outside of character you know he’s an absolute ball of sunshine)

Gina, Beth, and Christian talking about how they’d challenge each other to stay off sweets back on the original set, because they knew they needed to stay in shape and also just because they’re competitive (apparently all of them are major sweet tooths) and hide brownies and things from each other, while Aldis is just. doing pushups. eating all the healthy stuff. and then wanders into the room with a literal cupful of chocolates

(and Aldis going “well yeah I have to work off the sweets SOMEHOW”)

Beth explaining that sometimes they’d order a “Kane burrito” from Christian and he’d alter it slightly

Like, you know, chopping up hot jalapenos super fine and mixing them in, and Beth practically not being able to talk after the first bite

Apparently Aldis still went back a lot even after that

(Christian just seems very pleased with himself over it)

(THESE PEOPLE)

Gina goes “hey we should have an episode where we all swap roles,” Devlin going “WAIT FOR SEASON ONE TO BE DONE,” and then somebody (maybe the moderator?? I don’t remember exactly) going “uh actually. We did that”

Cue immediate scramble of “WAIT WHICH JOB WAS THAT”

(paraphrasing) “Yeah you remember the bit where you put on Parker’s harness and went off a building?”

Turns out half the cast had actually forgotten that that existed and only remember when reminded

The original cast all think of the episodes as “jobs”!!!!

Everyone talking over each other, Devlin going “it was with Sterling when we blew up the offices,” deciding that it was the season one finale, and then trying to figure out what episode title it was (eventually they figure out it’s the David jobs)

Moderator and Devlin accurately commenting that the fans know the show much better than they do

Noah Wyle very correctly explaining how Electric Entertainment is like a family and Devlin just. Keeps people

Aleyse and Aldis talking about typing when they’re hacking and going “WHAT THE HECK DO WE TYPE”

Aldis goes “yeah I just type all the bad words that we’re not allowed to say”

Aleyse saying that she’s always a little worried they’re hiding a Word document behind the blue screen and they’re going to pull up what she’s typing at the end of the day and print it out and put it in her trailer going “what the HECK is this”

Noah talking about filming The Golf Job and just getting to direct Jason Marsters and Christian together

Apparently their dynamic in that episode accurately mirrors the one with their characters in Angel!

Which promptly goes straight to the comment that it was very hard to make Marsters look like a golfer (pfft)

(Also apparently Christian plays golf for fun with his friends? Not necessarily something I would’ve thought of!)

Aleyse happily talking about how she loved the dynamic on set and it was very different from what she was used to

Also Aleyse talking about doing stunts and everyone else praising her for going whole hog

Beth especially praising her for the bit where she’s hit with the paralysis injection (I don’t remember which ep it’s from) and her acting for it, because it was incredibly hard to drop off screen in the particular way she did

Aleyse promptly answers that she was terrified with some of those, especially one where she had to keep a clock from falling and breaking

Everyone discussing how they see a new aspect of Breanna’s character in The Train Job

Also, to get serious for a moment, Kate Rorick in particular talks about how Breanna’s part of Gen Z and how we didn’t get the “days of yore” where everything was chill. We’ve basically been living in a world of hostility the whole time. It’s something I deeply appreciate, as someone who’s part of that group, and I love how they emphasize that for us.

This panel was pure chaos and I loved every moment of it! My stomach was actually hurting from laughing so hard, I swear. They had me cackling well over half the time. I would happily take panels double or triple the length of this, this was amazing. I also adore how the second you drop these six people in a room together, they immediately take off and literally just run and give you everything you wanted and more. (It is also evidently very hard to get them to STOP talking.)

I’m also just going to stop and take a second to fawn over the effects for the 3D room. It’s gorgeous—I love how they replicated the headquarters, especially with the stained glass ceilings! Super impressive, especially with all the photos, and I just love the whole thing. Kudos to whoever put that together.

Anyway, I’m definitely missing some stuff too; seriously, there wasn’t a second wasted in this thing, they were cracking some kind of joke or dropping some really interesting piece of information practically every thirty seconds. (And I haven’t even gotten into the clips OR the bloopers. I miiiight do a separate reaction purely for those.) It’s still up right now if you missed it and you want to watch it! I’ll probably watch it again, honestly.