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bettyfrommars · 10 months

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out on the highway

older!Eddie x reader

this is a mid-2000's little blurb where Eddie is in his late 30's/early 40's and ends up in Oregon for whatever reason. maybe this is even drifter!eddie. there are so many isolated gas stations and mechanic garages where I am, I think about this every time I am on the road.

wc: 770

It was a dark and foggy November night when you pulled over to the first gas station for 50 miles on your long trek to the Pacific Northwest. Only a sliver of a moon in the sky and very few visible stars, most of them obscured by bully clouds.

The two pumps under a metal awning were well-lit, as were the modest mechanic garage and mini mart connected to it, but the rest of the surrounding land was nothing but agriculture fields with no other sign of human life to be found.

Perhaps you’d watched too many horror movies and episodes of Forensic Files, but this place gave you the creeps bad enough to make you wonder if it might be better to chance your luck and see how far you could get on fumes.

You opened your door a crack, enough to stick the toe of your foot out, and a song from the newest Arcade Fire album Funeral blared from your speakers, just before you turned the ignition off. You were about to get out and pump your own gas, because that was what you were used to—but then there stood a person, mere feet away, and you sank back, ready to slam your door, feeling suddenly threatened.

The person in question was a man in light blue coveralls, with the added warmth of a leather jacket and black, fingerless gloves. He had dark, wavy hair, just long enough to tuck behind his ears with two silver hoop piercings in one lobe, and there was some type of tattoo design peeking out of his collar on his throat. His eyes were dark brown and kind, and you couldn’t help but notice the thin scar that pulled down the skin of one eye and made it droop slightly.

It took you an extra second to realize he had a cat with him. The orange and brown calico teenager was perched on his shoulder and he steadied it with one hand to keep the feline secure while the tail swished behind. The hand that held the cat was slashed in white scars, decorated in chunky, silver rings, and the fingernails had chipped black polish on them.

He stopped abruptly, not wanting to scare you, not when that eastern side of the state had too many similarities to the scene of the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

“Sorry, hi, I’m Eddie,” he opened the palm of his free hand and spread his fingers out in a bit of a Spock greeting to let you know he was safe. “And this is Yvette,” he added, gesturing to the calico cat that he gently lowered to the ground. You both watched her sprint off to the garage and through a tiny door that had been cut in the sheet metal.

“Regular or super?” He asked, clicking the pump handle off the port before you could get out and do it yourself.

“Don’t worry about it, I don’t mind—-” you were about to step down to do it yourself.

But then he chuckled softly, realization dawning. “You can’t pump your own gas in Oregon,” he let you know in a patient voice, avoiding your eyes. “I have to do it. It’s the law," and at that last bit, he wiggled his eyebrows.

“Oh, of course,” you gave a ‘silly me’ laugh and crawled back in behind the wheel to shut the door before rolling the window down. You gave him 20 bucks, and then you watched him from the side mirror as he stood there making sure you got what you paid for. He was humming a song; one you couldn't place.

“So,” you spoke up, sticking your head out of the window. “How long have you lived here?”

He worked his jaw as he checked the rolling numbers on the gas tank, tucking a hair that escaped to his cheek, still never looking directly at you. “I’ve been here a while,” he said, vaguely.

You stared at your steering wheel for a bit, until you heard the pump click to let him know your tank was full.

“Thank you,” you said out the window. He cleared his throat and said a gentle, “you’re welcome”, as he twirled your gas cap closed and snapped the shield into place. You watched him head back into the garage, with several cats circling his feet.

You spent the next several miles on the desolate road wondering about Eddie, why he looked so familiar, and how he’d ended up in such a po-dunk town. You wondered about him until you were sleepy and had to pull over at a roadside motel to get some rest.

You weren’t very far from the gas station, and you wondered if he would still be there in the morning.

#Eddie Munson fic #Eddie Munson hc #older!Eddie munson #mechanic!eddie

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thesherrinfordfacility · 1 year

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okay let's get them hard truths out in the open following episode 6, bearing in mind that i am in the UK and am therefore chronically sleep-deprived, and have watched the Feral Domestic™ maybe only like oh 7 times:

crowley is as much at fault as aziraphale. they are both as bad as each other. their own individual idiosyncrasies are literally the other's emotional downfall and if im honest im not entirely sure there's any way they can adequately move past it.

waxed on and on and on about it, but aziraphale's issue is not that he has any allegiance to heaven. he doesn't at all, and that is obvious in his initial reaction to the metatron, in that he essentially says that he knows his place and it is not Up Above. it is right there in the bookshop, and with crowley (even if he didn't consciously think it that explicitly at the time). he doesn't want any part of the heaven that it currently is, he has had enough and is tired of trying to be the angel that hides who he is and what he wants from his existence. that much is very much clear.

but the mantra throughout most of life is to be the change you want to see in the world. look at the major societal issues that are happening in the world today; people are rising up and fighting for what is right, and what they believe in, and wanting to make changes. now look at this opportunity that aziraphale has been given. regardless of the questionable motive of the metatron offering it to him; if you were in his position, could you say you'd find it easy to refuse that?

the issue here with aziraphale is that he (again, ill harp on about it until the cows come home) thinks that crowley - this demon that isn't a good demon because he is good and kind and gentle - would want to have his place in making that change happen; be by aziraphale's side whilst they create the world and heaven that is different from the largely shit one they've always known, hated, and feared. this is where the Pedestal comes in; like i said before, aziraphale has now been confronted with the fact that this demon, his best friend and love of his life, is acting in the way he's always acted but that aziraphale refuses to acknowledge... because to acknowledge crowley's shortcomings (which ill discuss in a sec) would be to question aziraphale's faith in him, and mean falling from the pedestal that has been aziraphale's status quo for the last few thousand years at minimum.

edit: this also needed adding because it touches on aziraphale's tendency to hold himself superior to crowley, which he also does in the Domestic scene.

crowley's issue is twofold. one, he cannot move on from the fall. second, that he is sometimes a manipulative and childish shit. the first is obvious, and his recent experiences with heaven have only compounded this (ie his conversation with gabriel/goob, where he lays into him about gabriel's part in the cruelty shown towards aziraphale to the point he almost makes goob kill/injure himself). crowley can also however be incredibly cruel borne out of his own pain. there were major hints in s2 that not only did crowley fall (no matter what the metatron says, im still not convinced he fell for only asking questions) but he fell from a great sodding height that in his mind should have made him untouchable. my thoughts on morality in heaven have already been discussed, but that must have had a huge impact on crowley; it is no wonder that it's a sore point and he feels bitter, resentful, and angry.

in the above context, id want nothing to do with heaven either. but crowley doesn't communicate and im guessing that his feelings about the fall are a No Go area in terms of what he's shared with aziraphale... so for crowley to assume that aziraphale turned down the metatron is grossly unfair - how was aziraphale necessarily meant to know how deep his trauma (if we're applying human mental health constructs) runs? he isn't to know that at all - so it does track that aziraphale would think that crowley would want to help him make a difference so they don't have to keep getting involved in the toxicity that is the heaven/hell politico-moral dichotomy.

what also upset me about the Domestic was the kiss. i loved it for what it was in isolation and it was a long time coming, and a huge movement in the dance they constantly have with each other, but it was in essence manipulative. i realise crowley was on his last emotional straw and yes, perhaps the love and devotion got too much for him to contain... but he literally just stood there and heard aziraphale tell him that he wanted crowley and he wanted them to be together. there were no qualms at all that aziraphale loves him as much as he loves aziraphale. so, what was the kiss meant to prove?

to my mind, it was manipulation; specific, a temptation. whilst very romantic and 'sweep him off his feet with the violins playing', it was also non-consensual and unwarranted on crowley's part - to the point of being derogatory and redundant (lets be clear: not a criticism on Neil for adding the kiss, im purely talking about crowley as a character and his Choices here). there was nothing to prove, nothing that that kiss could have possibly convinced aziraphale to do. so the only thing that leaves, imo, is that it was a temptation. crowley does not typically use temptation in this way, or at least that's the impression ive had throughout s1 and s2, so he chooses now is the time? to tempt aziraphale into staying with him? of course he does!

he's desperate, but also childish and immature and completely ignorant of what aziraphale is actually saying to him. aziraphale never denied him; aziraphale wanted him in this opportunity exactly by his side as he always has been. but that didn't fit with what crowley wanted, so he tried to make aziraphale bend to his will. aziraphale says the fatal words "i forgive you", but if he has (as i suspect he has) realised that crowley was trying to manipulate him... well, id probably say something as damning to crowley as 'i forgive you' too.

when aziraphale said 'nothing last forever', i realise crowley took that to mean him and the life that they built together, but it obviously wasn't that at all. aziraphale is saying that they have eternity ahead of them, that he wants to spend it with crowley, whatever has to end around them (ahem the world? apocalypse from s1, anyone?). aziraphale demonstrated consistently throughout s2 that he is trying to give crowley his own agency where heaven/hell are concerned (paraphrased but: "I want you to help me but if you don't want to, you are free to leave"). crowley however seemed that he was constantly one foot out the door in case things got Too Much (which, you know - valid) but aziraphale really did his best to make crowley not only not feel suffocated but also that crowley was wanted. and for anyone that is a tough balancing act.

the two of them have had 6000+ years of Not Really Communicating. this is the detritus that remains when they don't, and it was absolutely needed in this season. for them to break apart and break in and of themselves. s3 needs to be where they learn more about themselves than each other, and stop believing that the other is infallible, because such thinking - worship, blind faith - only ends badly.

#good omens #not the analysis this fandom wants #but the analysis that it needs #i will proof read this at some point so if shit doesnt read well or make sense just pretend that it does #aziraphale meta #s2 meta #feral domestic/final fifteen meta

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antoncyng · 8 months

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another small drabble because these kind of plots have been on my mind ever since the video of jennie surprising rose on her fancall 2 years ago.. can you see where im going ? so imagine this with you and wonbin.. 🤍

surprise! - park wonbin

idol!bf!wonbin x nonidol fem!reader

warnings: complete fluff, wonbin as a whipped af bf, supportive reader gf, pet names (angel, baby, princess)

wc : 763

seeing your boyfriend of 3 and a half years get to the top of album charts internationally and in korea, it made you proud. at most times you felt like a proud mom watching her son grow into his dream, and wonbin always knew he had an amazing supportive girlfriend waiting for him at home after his long schedules. at first, the difference between schedules was a small problem when wonbin first debuted. RIIZE was busy everyday, music show after music show. and when they weren’t recording pre-recordings for music bank or inkigayo, they were recording songs. comeback after comeback, wonbin was tired! his favorite part of the day was being able to come home to his affectionate girlfriend, and listen to her day as he slowly falls asleep in her arms.

“baby i have to go now,” wonbin said with a small frown as he looked down at you, clinging onto the standing boys torso as you sat in bed, just woke up. “its so early, i dont want you to go yet” you said, mumbling the words into his shirt as you heard his chuckle at your actions. “i’ll be home soon tonight, we have a fancall and thats it okay? ill be back soon” he told you, gently brushing his fingers through your bed hair, looking up at him and nodding. he bent down to give you a last kiss for that morning before he left, leaving you home alone.

but you were planning something for wonbin, he told you multiple times before that he enjoyed talking to fans and interacting with them through calls, but he got very socially drained easily. and what was the cure to that? you. yes, you spent $650 on albums for your boyfriend to cheer him up while he did his job, and thankfully you got in! you used a different name, your english(or second) name that your parents gave you, the name wonbin definitely wouldn’t be able to tell its you.

POV CHANGE ; yns pov

i got out of bed, looking at the time and remembering my time slot, i had until 3:50 pm. it was currently 11:00 am, i had all the time in the world right now! i sat on the couch going through netflix, finding a show. i finished a few episodes and looked at the time, oh okay its just 3:00.. wait its 3:00 already?! oh my god i have to get ready for the fancall! i jumped off of the couch and ran to my room, changing only my top since wonbin wouldn’t be able to see my pants, then into the bathroom to get ready, i finished my makeup and looked at the time. perfect! 3:35, ill set up the phone and get ready for the call. i sat at my desk in me and wonbins shared room, my phone set up with my mirror lights on, a stand up background behind me with decorations and pictures of wonbin, feeling slightly cringed but excited to see his reaction. i checked the time again, 3:48, i should be getting the call anytime so-

*ring ring ring, ring ring ring*

the phone is ringing! okay, take a deep breath.. wait why am i so nervous? hes my boyfriend..

POV CHANGE BACK authors pov

you answer the video call, the staff holding up a piece of paper with the questions, “can you hear me when i say this?” she says hello and you nod, not wanting to use your voice yet in case wonbin was already listening. the staff held up an OK! 👌 hand and said “please wait”, soon enough you saw the phone being set up to a distracted wonbin, looking down at the album.

“hello? earth to wonbin?” you said with a big smile on your face, watching him snap his head up with a huge smile painted on his face as soon as he recognized your voice. “princess, what are you doing here? why would you buy my fancall?” he asked excitingly, before he got cut off by a younger members peeking his head into the camera. “hiiiii ynie!!” an excited sohee said, you waving to him as he got pushed and shooed away by wonbin. “i wanted to surprise you, i know you said your calls get tiring so i wanted to give you some energy,” you said smiling, then pointing to the background. “do you like it? i made it myself!” you said proudly, watching wonbins huge grin on his grow bigger.

“i love it, thank you angel, youll always be my number supporter hm?”

#antoncyng #riize imagines #riize x reader #antoncyng drabble #riize wonbin #wonbin #park wonbin #wonbin x reader #riize au #kpop au

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pistatsia · 11 months

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Isagi Yoichi: problems with anger expression

Clickbait, right? One would think that what kind of anger expression problems could there be with a guy swearing on the field with war-crime level insults and joyfully bringing a child a few years younger to tears?

The kind where one derives from the the other.

Now, let's figure it out.

To do so, we'll have to go back to Isagi's novel (hoshi801_ translation is used for all of the quotes). From it, we know that Isagi grew up as a quiet and shy child. "He never gets into fights with his friends and never disobeys his teachers."

Nevertheless, it ended quite simply then - thanks to Noa, he learnt how to express his anger and negative feelings. Problem? Only on the football field. The novel says he "was fearless in running into his opponents, as if he had never been a crybaby."

He was winning, and what he liked best about football - his football, Noa's football - was the beauty of Noa’s playstyle brutality. Because that's what made it an acceptable outlet for him - fighting with friends is bad, arguing with teachers is not allowed - but on the football pitch you are free. You can be angry. Football became his safe space.

Except that then Isagi entered the root of all his troubles - Ichinan.

Even before it, the novel mentioned and emphasised Isagi's inability to express himself. For a while, despite this, his plans worked: the coaches let him play the way he wanted, and he didn't have to come into direct conflict with them.

But that trick didn't work in Ichinan - the dream school suddenly turned out to be somehow strange, and Isagi felt that he wasn't allowed to fulfil his potential here.

But no one on the team was unsatisfied by the current system.

Even before the conversation with the coach where he was ridiculed Isagi had tried to test the waters. Specifically to test - he doesn't say anything outright in fear of being rejected. "Uhm, Tada-kun… don’t you think there’s something wrong with this?" he asks his club mate very cautiously, while in thoughts having more direct “Huh? Am I the only one who thinks that this is ridiculous?”. It's written out separately in the novel that "he watches the expression on Tada's face to see how he'll react" - Isagi already has problems. He's already learnt that he can be rejected if his opinion doesn't coincide with the majority - especially since the conversation wasn't taking place in 'football territory', where he was more or less able to talk straight.

Having an opinion for Isagi means isolation.

But he still tries one last time - one that finally cracks him up, convincing him that the others know better and he just needs to be patient.

In the novel his friends are "Surprized, seeing the quiet and obedient Isagi talk to the coach" - again, he is used to keeping quiet and not risking. Still, he dares to - and is immediately ridiculed for allegedly trying to "show off".

And this is what finally kills in him the will to resist. Because losing his friends and football is more terrifying for him than losing himself.

What does the novel says about Isagi after this episode? "He is afraid of being disliked for being assertive", "always timid", "compliant". "When his friends get excited, Isagi would say something like this: “Uh, yeah… me too”."

"He just goes with the flow."

Isagi agrees with Tada's taste in girls, agrees to eat what he doesn't want to, pleases in every way possible just so he won't be abandoned. He obeys the coach's strategy, and even on the field - the only thing that gave him joy and was a safe place for him - he ends up obeying the rules his surroundings have imposed on him.

He doesn't try to argue, he doesn't try to prove anything - he just chooses the safest path, the one where he doesn't do anything and doesn't fight, but he stays safe. Not abandoned.

What's the conclusion?

Isagi doesn't know how to express anger at all. He just hasn't learnt it because he hasn't tried it. And most importantly, doesn't know how to express it correctly.

Why is it necessary (and important) to know how to anger correctly in the first place? The point is that for the mentality anger is a kind of marker that lets us know when our interests are violated and our needs are not satisfied. Which by its presence helps us to build boundaries and achieve what we need. Anger is the power and energy to change an unpleasant world to suit us and achieve our goals.

But Isagi was shamed for showing negative emotions and for any attempt to express himself. He was shown non-verbally that any expression of self and attempt to argue, even just a different opinion would be received grudgingly, that you had to agree on everything, that if you tried to argue you would be rejected and not only that, you would lose the football.

And Isagi tamps down the anger inside himself - he no longer stands up for himself, and holds back the anger to the last, storing it up inside for years.

He develops a ban on anger.

And in general, not just anger - any negative emotion. He is unable to express even the despair of losing to Kira correctly; he tries to suppress it, to muffle it, the novel explicitly states that he attempts to lock it up inside, but in the end, having overflowed, this despair against his will burst out in a scream. Isagi suppresses all negative feelings in general. Aside from the crying part, this repressed anger is evident even in the first chapter, when he imagines the goalkeeper in tears from defeat, and dreams of crushing Kira. Without saying it out loud, though.

And in that 'against his will' lies the main problem of why exactly anger needs to be lived out properly.

Because otherwise it'll spill out just like that scream - desperate, seething, expansive, and the worst part?

Uncontrollable.

What is the danger of not controlling the expression of anger? Why can't we just hide it inside and keep smiling, without causing anyone problems and without wasting the resources of our body on it, just adjusting? Yes, in doing so you lose your freedom of expression - so what?

Because anger doesn't disappear over time. It is put inside layer by layer, day by day.

And sooner or later you can't hold it back.

In life this rarely ends well: if a person holds themselves to a completely unhealthy level of control they may at some point experience an episode of derealisation - when repressed feelings become so abundant that the brain rolls out one of the strongest self-defence mechanisms - detachment. If it doesn't? One goes off the rails: he overreacts to the smallest of things, he is thrown from one-time hook-ups to drugs and alcohol. The accumulated anger begins to destroy from the insides.

But Isagi, as an adaptation specialist (unconsciously, most likely) has come up with a great answer to this, learnt from childhood and from the show with Noel Noa. Which one? Express anger where it would be considered normal.

Blue Lock with on-field swearing works for Isagi for many reasons at once. He got Bachira, who showed him that there's nothing wrong with expressing his angry-self - he'll be accepted, he would even be welcomed, it's okay to be angry! He got Chigiri and Kunigami, Nanase and Hiori, dozens of people accepting him no matter what (but in personal conflicts outside the field he usually still doesn't know how to behave - he prefers to withdraw and wait for things to resolve themselves - but that's for another time). Here, also, the issue of survival came into play, as expressions of anger and rage were cultivated by the Ego itself, sometimes specifically manipulating the players to do so.

There's also the application of the familiar pattern of his pre-Ichinan childhood ('I play football as rough as Noa - I'm doing well, I'm not alone, and I achieve my goals because it happens on the field, so it doesn't mean anything'), the general tense atmosphere, and a fair number of trigger characters who would drive even a saint to their grave (heh, Kaiser, heh). Isagi in general has more to do with football than almost all of Blue Lock's characters. Manifestations of anger and determination as a child (on the football field!)? Noa. Manifestations of them now? Blue Lock. He continues to use mechanisms familiar from childhood to protect himself, adapting them to new realities.

(basically, even the fact that Noa is around - who, again, once gave little Isagi the opportunity to express himself openly on the field - can have an impact on the escalation of Isagi's behaviour around Kaiser and Bastards. Whose presence and support is associated with a safe expression of himself)

like father like son

And uncontrollable anger bursts out, but for now like water from a cracked jug - in jolts, strong and those impossible to shut down, but from just one place. The swearing at the match and the opportunity to openly express himself and his objectives (remember how he shouted at Noa that his system doesn't allow him to score goals hahaha) allowed him to relax, to partially release the anger accumulated over the years - all without any realisation on his part. He doesn't even have to do anything - it all resolved itself. He's not being rejected, he's playing the way he wants to play and yet he's angry! That's great!

And everything seems to be fine, right?

The problem is that Blue Lock's setting just isn't going to work in the long run. Ego will be there for the rest of the project - another 2-3 months - and for training for the World Championship, for the Championship itself, and... that's it. The project ends, Isagi flies off to play in another country, but who can guarantee that the environment for such an expression of anger will be replicated there as well?

At one point, access to the field and, in principle, to the competitive and encouraging environment for such expressions of character in Blue Lock is bound to be cut off. There are gaps between seasons, injuries, end of career, and the simple fact that such expression depends on how much the coach allows to players - at some point Isagi may well be silenced.

And then all the accumulated, bubbling anger inside, which is now used to being expressed regularly, will spill out - and not on the safe field, where much can be blamed on adrenaline, but on his loved ones, his career and himself.

#gosh I'm so happy that I've started the blog #I can't show everything I want in terms of character analysis in my fics #and now I can do it here and it's so refreshing #blue lock analysis #bllk analysis #bllk #blue lock #isagi yoichi

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juliasturnz · 3 months

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“Your turn to relax.”

MATT STURNIOLO X Y/N

Hi my looovess, I am absolutely in love with writing, I’m trying to write as much as possible so I can spoil y’all hihi.🤪

Warnings!

pet names (sweetheart, baby ml (my love) more..) cussing, making out / kissing ect- i think that’s all enjoy🤭

summary:

you always have been giving matt little spa days, a little skincare routine or even a massage. He wants to bring change in that

Little note

Thank you all so much for the likes reblogs and the sweet comments, I’m beyond grateful for this. I hope y’all like this one toooo have fun reading♥️

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡° ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡

you are laying down in your bed with a smile on your face just by thinking about yesterday, you and Matt that the most amazing night, y’all watched a few movies, did skincare together, Matt giving you a lot of kisses and hugs and him even sleeping at your place.

when you realize he had slept over you look next to you but he isn’t there, ‘huh he slept over right?’ You say out loud. You look closer and you see a little letter on his side, you curiously pick the tiny letter from his side and flip the perfect folded pink paper open. You quickly read the the message “hi baby, I have something planned for today. Because of that I already left pretty early to take care of everything, be ready around 6PM. I already know you are going to be looking gorgeous, I love you, see you soon!🩷” you smile at the paper with the beautiful handwriting and the exciting news written on it.

you decided to call Nick, he obviously knows about you and Matt but you just needed some help with a good outfit. “Hey y/n hruuu?” “Hey Nick I’m doing goooddd, but I need a favor rq .. can you come to my house? Matt has this whole date planned and I have no fucking idea what i want to wear, and since your the fashion icon I wondered if you want to come over” “I’m good too thanks” he says jokingly, you giggle through the phone and before you get to say please, what he already knows you were going to say he says, “but yeah ofcourse I’ll be there in 25 minutes I need to get ready, I just woke up and need to call a Uber.” You could clearly tell he just woke up by the sound of his raspy voice.“Take your time okay?” You say comforting through the phone. “Don’t worry I will”

right after he hangs up you start to pick something he can choose from. A long tight dark blue dress with black heels, or a mini skirt with a black top and a leather jacket and black high boots or a short dark red dress with shoes you are still not sure about. So it’s basically, drive Matt insane, him complementing you or him going even more insane. With that thought slipping into your head you kind of already know what you wanna wear, but maybe Nick had something that would make the outfit better, bc these ones are just a bit plain and boring.

You spend your time waiting for him to come over by eating some pancakes with chocolate syrup that made you think of Matt, and watching the last episode of Ginny and Georgia. When you finally have eaten all of your pancakes and watched until the last minute of your jaw dropping ending from your series you hear the doorbell.

You run to the front door and open it quick, ‘hey Niickk!’ You say very exited. You were always exited when he came around, he always brought some sort of aura with him that would make you feel happy. ‘Hey girrll!’ he says while giving you a hug. You quickly invite him in with a already very excited look on your face. ‘Sooo do you want something to drink or? Oh wait did you have breakfast yet I c’- he interrupts you ‘did you seriously make chocolate syrup pancakes’ he says with a mind blowing look. ‘Yesss why?’ You say with a suspicious look knowing what he’s gonna say already. ‘Okay that just makes me sick to my stomach, I am not gonna ask further’ you start laughing at his disgusted face. ‘But no thank you I’ll grab something from your fridge later.’ He says right after you were done laughing at his face still looking disgusted.

a little while later you wave him to come with you to your bedroom with the paired clothing laying on your bed. ‘Wait I’m gonna grab some Dr Pepper and I’ll be there okay?’ He says with a comforting smile. ‘Yeah sure!’ You are going to your bedroom bringing some light into your still dark room, when Nick bangs into your room with a big music box and entering your bedroom with literal girlboss music. You start laughing so hard you trip over pile of clothes on your bedroom floor. ‘Omg are you okay’ Nick says while stopping the music and laughing even harder looking at your clumsy ass tripping over your clothes. ‘Yes I’m okay’ you say still laughing while you’re now sitting on the pile of clothes.

When you both finally reach the topic of the clothes you are going to wear, Nick already says ‘do whatever you feel like you want to wear.’ You point at the short dark red dress, ‘oh hell yes’ he says while nodding his head. ‘Okay hear me out, what if you put that leather jacket from the other outfit on top of it. And omg with those high black boots’ You gasp ‘oh my god Nick, you actually need to give me advice for my outfits everyday.’ He gives a warm smile. You quickly get the stuff you want to wear and come back from the bathroom. Nick gasps at the sight of his created look on you, ‘oh my god you look fucking amazing’ his face scans your outfit, ‘you look really really good girl!’ You get a little uncomfortable from the amount of compliments you get. You hang out with Nick for a while and you say you were going to get ready. You look kinda nervous, you are a bit unsure about the situation. Obviously not about the date but you just stress a little bit about what he has planned since he left so early. ‘You are going to be fine, that mf loves you forever.’ Nick says when he noticed your worried look, you smile and say thank you, ‘oh yeah also a big big big big thank you for helping me with my outfit and hanging out today, I really enjoyed it!’ You give Nick a big hug and he leaves your home.

You put on your playlist and start getting ready, a soft glam with a little bit of glitter on your eyes, dark red lipstick and lastly some deodorant and Matt’s favorite cologne. You take a full length mirror picture and send it to Nick. He’s online right away and sends you a lot of compliments.

When it’s finally time you put on one time some deodorant and again Matt’s favorite cologne. You put the things you need quickly in a handbag, when you already hear the familiar honk from Matt’s car. You check in a nervous rush if you have everything and run to the front door

Matt’s jaw drops at the sight of you in Nick’s paired outfit. He moves closer and grabs your waist and gives you a passionate kiss on your mouth, he hasn’t said anything yet which makes you nervous until he finally speaks up. ‘You are the most beautiful woman I’ve been laid my eyes on.’ He says while he’s still admiring your outfit and your body in the outfit. ‘Do a spin for me’ he says, you know damn well he just wants to see your ass in the dress but ofcourse you still do your casual spin. His eyes follow the curves of you body and he gives you another kiss on your lips. ‘Are you ready?’ He says with a smile on his face ‘yesss im so excited I’- you couldn’t even finish your sentence when he already grabbed your arm and opened the car door for you. ‘Okay mister fancy pants’ you say with a flirty smile on your face. He shuts the door with a smile when you buckled up, and walked to the drivers seat. He opens the door silently and falls into the drivers seat next to you and gives you another kiss, ‘you look so gorgeous, just like I said on the tiny letter.’ he says with a cute little smile on his face. He starts the car and plays music, he dances, sings and keeps looking at you when a romantic lyric plays. You’ve never see him this excited before, all of your nervousness flows away. You let your boyfriend guide you to the first location of tonight.

You stop at this beautiful fancy restaurant, you look at Matt while he just smiles at your surprised face. He could look at your beautiful face forever. ‘Should we go inside then?’ He says still with the same smile on his face. You are surprised that we are at a restaurant, Matt doesn’t even like restaurants. ‘Matt this is insane isn’t this crazy expensive?’ ‘Y/n I have one rule for tonight’ he says with a suspicious look, ‘you can’t ask questions about the places we are going to go to.’ Wait did he say places? before you can ask a question on what the fuck is happening, he already steps out of the car walks to your side and opens your door, and takes your hand.

When y’all cross the street while holding each other’s hand, you arrive at the probably the most fanciest restaurant you’ve ever seen. You look at Matt and you already catch him looking at you before you open the door and go into the restaurant he gives you another kiss on your lips. You laugh at his now dark red lips, you go into the restaurant, ‘Matt wait imma get you a wet wipe’ you say laughing. ‘Wait what’ he looks confused, he opens his phone to check and his cheeks turn a little red when he realizes. You can’t help but keep laughing when you are on your way getting a wet wipe for Matt’s now dark red lips.

When you return to your boyfriend aggressively wiping his lips not getting it off, you start laughing even more then you did before. ‘You are such a dumbass I knew this was going to happen’ you say giggling. ‘Omg I’m so embarrassed, you just look so good and I’- before you wipe his red lips you give him another kiss. Without you noticing he already has his hands on your waist again.

You finally start wiping the red lipstick from his lips he can’t help but just stare at your lips. ‘I want to kiss you more this night did you have to put on that lipstick?’ He says with a needy tone. ‘I thought you’d like it’ you say with a sarcastic sad face, ‘oh shut up’ he kisses you again what makes you laugh even harder when he realizes.

After you both finally actually got to the point that Matt’s lips weren’t red anymore he took your hand and checks in, ‘yes a table for 2’ he says to the man behind the counter. ‘To what name?’ He asks politely ‘for miss and mr Sturniolo’ he looks at you with a innocent smile, he knows so damn well. ‘Yes come with me please.’ The waiter guides us to the best place in the restaurant you can think of. When the waiter leaves you two alone, you immediately speak up. ‘What the fuck Matt, this is insaaane I love you so much.’ ‘Did you like the fact that I called us mr and miss Sturniolo?’ He gives you a naughty smile. ‘Yes a lot’ you say giggling a little. ‘Good’ he smiles at you in a way you’ve never seen before. You want to ask him about that when the waiter comes to the table. He hands out 2 menus and leaves, you open the menu and your mouth falls open. ‘9 dollars for a Coca Cola is absolutely insane, are you sure you want to eat here?’ You look up to see Matt already lost in the big menu looking for what he’s gonna order. How does he even look pretty when he’s literally looking into a fucking menu. You are not gonna ask him again he already looks so interested, it really warms your heart.

He looks up at you ‘what are going to get’ he asks with a cute smile, you can’t seem to answer its all so expensive and you feel really bad for just asking for a Coca Cola. He sees your frustrated look, ‘hey y/n it’s okay’ he grabs your soft hands. ‘You can get whatever you want I’ll take care of it.’ His hands touching yours is what caught your attention. ‘I feel so bad Matt, how is a steak more then 40 dollars like hello?!’ he squeezes your hands and nods and says the same sentence once again, ‘it’s okay I’ll take care of it.’

a conversation has started when you both ordered and got your food, ‘so what do you think,’ he looks innocent, very curious about what your answer is going to be. ‘I love it so much but I literally feel so bad, why did you randomly make a date night’ you say in a calm tone. ‘I thought it was your time to relax’ you smile at him, ‘it seemed like you really needed it, it is always you who makes the dates and because it was my first one organizing it I wanted to make it special, but I kinda got carried away’ you giggle at the thought of him getting carried away by trying to organize a special night just for you. ‘I’m really lucky to have the most handsome, sweet and caring man infront of me rn.’ ‘I love you so much y/n’ for a minute you are just staring at his beautiful blue eyes, you are convinced he has the prettiest eyes you’ve ever seen. But his look changes when he realizes ‘I have one favor rn, you need to eat your food a little quicker okay?’ You look at him confused but it seemed like he meant it so you did.

You both finished your food and you say thank you again. ‘I’m so beyond grateful for this I love you,’ ‘I love you too baby.’ ‘I’m going to the bathroom rq okay? I’ll be right back.’ While you stand up you can feel Matt staring at your ass, you look back and look at him with a naughty smile.

You arrive at the bathroom and take of your red lipstick, and when you come back your boyfriend is waiting for you right outside the bathroom. ‘I love the way you took of your lipstick’ ‘I took care of everything btw’ he kisses you right away while his hands lock on your waist, you give him another kiss ‘thank you baby but you didn’t have to, I could’ve helped.’ ‘No it’s totally okay’ he smiles at you and you both leave the beautiful restaurant with your hands holding each other tightly.

It’s a beautiful dark night, you are with him in the car again and you can’t help but kiss his perfect pink lips again. Once again you tell him how much you appreciate this night.

You arrive at the most beautiful place ever, it’s one of the places that is your personal favorite at night. The beach, when you already hear the sound of the sea you can’t believe what your hearing. Matt could already tell you knew, he smiles at you, ‘oh my god no fucking way’

Right in front of you is the most gorgeous sea you probably ever seen. This time you almost jump out of the car run around to the other side and take Matt’s hand. ‘My love wait I got some things in the back of the car for us to lay on yk?’ ‘Oh my god this night can’t get any better ahhhhh!’ Matt is now full on laughing at your reaction. ‘What are you laughing at!’ You give Matt a stomp on his shoulder ‘you look so happy it makes me giggle’

You guys are now laying down on a soft blanket with pillows, snacks, soda’s and these cute small beach chairs. You have your head laid down in his lap. A thought slips in your head. ‘Oh my god can we go swim pretty pleeeasse?’ He looks down at you confused ‘we don’t have like swimwear on rn right?’ ‘We have our underwear hellooo?’ Matt agrees and you almost jump from excitement. He loves seeing you happy, and he loved to do everything for it.

You take of your short red dress and large black boots, Matt hasn’t took of his clothes yet he just liked to watch you. You turn around and you realize ‘oh you naughty little boy!’ Before he takes of his clothes you say ‘now I have the same right watching you getting undressed.’ His cheeks turn a little pink from your face scanning his body while he undresses. you walk over to him and go sit down no not on the chairs he bought, on his lap. You lean into the best kiss yet, he lays his hands on your waist and moves you around a bit. You feel a tent growing right under you. You get of him and you bite your lip, ‘can we go swimming now I didn’t took my clothes of for nothing.’ He gives you a sarcastic offended look. ‘You are a little meanie, you know that right.’ You giggle seeing him in such a needy way.

You take his hand and you two run into the water, you kiss him right away and you guys just keep laughing and kissing for a while. ‘I’m not kidding this is probably the best night I’ve had in my entire life’ Matt’s has the biggest smile ever on his face, ‘not gonna lie I love this night also so much.’ And once again you laid your lips on his lips again.

After a while you both agreed to get out of the water you dry off and get back in the car with everything packed up again. ‘You can grab my hoodie I have one laid in the back’ he says while you pack up the last things in the back the car. ‘Okay thank you baby,’ ‘I probably have a combo in there so maybe there are sweatpants to have no idea.’ ‘I’ll go look thank you ml!’ You kind of yell bc Matt is already waiting for you in the drivers seat.

You are almost home when you realize you don’t go into the right streets, ‘wait what are you doing? These aren’t the streets you need to go to?’ Matt turns his head to you and just smiles ‘were going to my house.’ ‘Oh my god no way!’ Your smile only grows wider and wider this evening.

You arrive at his place and again jump out of the car from excitement. You run to Matt’s side and hug him really tight, ‘I love you sosososo much’ ‘I love you more sweetheart!’ He grabs the stuff from the beach and just lays it down in the garage. ‘I can take that upstairs if you want it i’- ‘no need to baby, I’ll tell Chris to clean it.’ He gives you a kiss and takes you upstairs to the living room where Nick and Chris are watching E.T. once again. ‘Hi guuuys!’ ‘Hi y/n!’ Chris and Nick say at the same time. ‘How did your date go?’ Chris asks ‘omg I need to tell you guys everything!’ You walk over to the couch and tell Nick and Chris to swoop so you could sit right in between them. Matt walks over to get some snacks and watches you tell everything about the amazing night he worked so hard on to organize. Meanwhile Nick looks over to look at Matt and smiles at him and gives him a thumbs up. ‘That’s so amazing!’ Nick says while Chris just keeps on asking about it. ‘Alright dude, can I take her now’ Matt says ‘she’s all yours bro’ Chris says. ‘Bye guuuyss have fun watching E.T.!!’

You walk down the hallway with Matt and he opens the door, ‘wait what?’ Your eyes are wide open by another surprise waiting in his bedroom. ‘Oh my god no fucking way!’ You walk into his room with his bed covered in snacks and soda’s once again. On his night stands are laying down different kinds of sheet face masks.

‘I guess we’re trying them on then’ Matt says you still stand next to him with your jaw wide open. Matt giggles a bit and gives you a little kiss on your cheek, ‘you deserved this’ you finally put your jaws together look at Matt and give him a big hug and a kiss on his lips.

‘So do you want to put on the tiger sheet mask on or should I?’ Matt looks at you but you are already holding up a pug mask ‘oh my god this is the one!’ Matt’s jaw drops ‘no way I brought a pug one..’ you start laughing ‘I bet you know you did.’ ‘No seriously I’- you give him another kiss to shut him up and pull the pug mask out of the plastic. ‘Ew it’s all wet’ Matt looks at the mask with a disgusted face, ‘duh that’s the whole point of it dumbass!’ You start giggling and help Matt put his mask on. ‘I think I’m going to go for a clay mask.’ You say jokingly. ‘No fucking way, you are also going to put a animal on your face. I ain’t going to be the only one!’ ‘I was just joking bae.’ You start almost crying laughing at his face when he realizes how dumb he sounded. Nick and Chris bursted into the room, ‘WHAT THE FUCK!’ Nick yells, he immediately pulls out his phone and takes a picture of Matt. ‘DUDE ARE YOU SERIOUS.’ ‘This is definitely going on the photodumb this Friday!’ Chris gives you a wink and they leave the room. ‘I hate those stupid mfs.’ ‘No you don’t.’ You started giggling at his mad face. ‘Come’ you give him a passionate kiss, ‘I love you so much my love.’ ‘I love you more baby.’

—————————⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☁︎—————————

Sorry the end is a bit confusing but I couldn’t find a right time to end the story and I loved writing this one so I kept on writing hehe🥳

𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐬:

@042502 @mattsfavbitchhh @mattttypooh @mattspolitank @mattsgf @matts-k1tten @slutz4sturniolos @hollandsangel @hoeformatt @h3arts4harry @hoesformatt @strawberrysturniolo @sturniolonmc @sturnioz @sturniololvrrr @sturnslcver @stuniolvs @sturnizolo @sturniololoverr @sturniolo @sturnioloshacker @chris-slut @chrissv4mp @chrisshotdog @chrissfawn @sturnzwrld @sturnzyolo @sturnzsblog @sturnzluv @sturnzluv @sturnzsun @sturnsbaby @sturnsdoll @sturnsblunt @sturnsstars

#sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #fanfic #date night

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lookinglass-fic · 1 year

Text

A bit personal, and also cw/tw for mentions of suicide/suicidal ideation//

I lost my best friend to suicide two years ago. And I can't lie, the themes in OFMD season 2 are hitting hard. Ed is definitely my comfort character, and I love him so much and just want good and nice things for him and want him to be happy.

The sucide themes are... heart-rendingly accurate and make total sense, in ways that I feel certain that someone(s) in the writing team and/or crew have had experiences with this particular thing.

It's bringing up a lot of grief and some unearthed trauma for me, I think. But I think it's also a great opportunity to talk about what you can recognize in friends and loved ones who might be having ideation.

In re-watching episode 2, I noticed some things. The day after the cake topper incident, the morning where Ed tells Frenchie, "I had a very rough night last night, but I think I got all of the poison out of my system," he's cleaning up the cabin. He's cleaned himself up. He's chipper. It's the same morning he gives the gun to Izzy, the same night that he goads the crew into killing him.

And please note, I am not an expert. I'm not a psychologist or therapist, I'm not qualified to dole out real advice. I've just become... intimately familiar with warning signs of suicide the past few years after joining some support groups and being part of discussions and hearing dozens upon dozens of stories from the people left behind. And this is just advice from one human being to others who might need to hear it.

People who have long-term ideation can tend to have a sudden upswing in the day or two immediately preceding death, and it's because they've made the decision to go ahead with it.

My friend had seemed to be getting better. He was chipper, sending photos of things he liked and generally texting/calling people in a cheerful mood. The day it happened, he was on a hike sending me pictures of rabbits and magpies.

If your loved one is going through an incredibly rough patch and has a sudden upswing in mood, if they start cleaning up by giving things away or making big changes, it's time to check in. It's time to find a way to break through to them and see if there's anything at all you can do to stop them from going through with it.

This show brings so much attention to so many things, and they get so many things right. I'm in a kind of a weird mental place right now just because this is bringing up a lot of feelings for me, but it's only because it's so accurate and hits so close to home. If this can help even one person, then it's worth me being weird on the internet about it.

And for anybody out there struggling... just find one thing. Just one thing to keep you here until tomorrow. Just one thing to stay for. Warmth. Food. Intercourse. Anything. Just please stay.

#ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd s02e03 #ofmd s02e02 #ofmd spoilers #ofmd spoiler #our flag means death spoiler #ofmd season 2 spoiler #trigger warning #tw #cw #content warning #su*cide #suicide #tw: suicide

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trashyswitch · 2 months

Text

Mess With Sun, You'd Better Run

Eclipse has been trying to take over Sun's body for the past week...And Sun is having none of it. When night time approaches, Sun decides to teach Eclipse a lesson in the hopes that it would slow his progress. Eclipse will quickly learn how scary Sun can be if you toy with him too much...

This fanfic was suggested by @anxious-lee-ler. Funny fact about this fanfic: I haven't watched through all of the web series, so I got a lot of help and approval from Drew for this fanfic! As a result, I already know he really likes it. I hope everyone else likes the fanfic too!

Sun was ready to lose it. Eclipse had been driving him nuts for the last several hours! It started with little things, like giving him small headaches while gaming with Moon. But it had escalated into trying to take him over while recording videos! He’d had enough. This has to stop. He hoped some talking and compromising would lessen the constant headache taking the form of Eclipse. He just had to wait until evening took hold.

Sun and Moon had just finished recording their episode for the day. They turned off their cameras and put their controllers down. “Alright…” Sun mumbled.

“Alright. I think a nap is in order.” Moon said aloud.

“Really?” Sun looked at Moon with surprise.

“What? Streaming makes me tired.” Moon told him.

“Sorry, just…” Sun thought for a moment. “Sorry…You go have a rest.”

Moon tilted his head. “Are you okay?” He asked him.

“Me?” Sun pointed to himself. “Oh yeah! Yeah, I’m fine.” He replied a bit too enthusiastically.

Moon stared at Sun for a few moments. “...Uh huh…” He muttered.

“I’m okay, I promise!” Sun tried to tell him, showing him a thumbs up.

Moon sighed and nodded his head. “Okay. Have a good night.” He told him before heading into the back room for the night.

“Good night!” Sun replied, waving to him as he watched his brother leave the main daycare. As Moon disappeared behind the curtain, Sun’s arm dropped to his side. Now was a better time than any to escape into his mind and confront Eclipse.

“You gonna pay me a visit, Sunny? It’s been forever…” The voice in his head asked.

Sun sighed. “Speak of the devil…” he mumbled to himself.

Sun sat himself down onto the chair behind the main desk of the daycare. With his body resting, Sun shut himself down and went into his inner mind. The first thing he saw when he opened his eyes was a big blur of dark orange in the corner of the room.

“Well look who finally showed up…” The blur mumbled with a sneer. He looked annoyed, almost like he knew Sun would arrive to give him hell.

“What’s the deal with you?” Sun asked.

“I’m bored...It gets quite boring here after a while.” He complained.

“Why the headaches?!” Sun spat.

“Because you never let me have any time in the spotlight!” Eclipse yelled back.

“And what have you done to earn yourself a chance?” Sun asked him.

“I’ve been silent, compliant, and patient with you. I think that speaks volumes.” He clarified.

“The only thing that speaks volumes is this constant headache that YOU started!” Sun argued.

“Well what else am I supposed to do?!” Eclipse argued.

“Literally anything! Anything besides giving me a mind-splitting headache!” Sun shouted.

“Okay, then I’ll take over.” Eclipse replied.

“NO!” Sun shouted, pushing him away.

Eclipse growled and stomped away from him, muttering the word “Asshole…” as he kicked the dirtless ground of the inner code.

Sun grunted to himself as he watched Eclipse act like a petulant child. He was getting nowhere with this guy. He looked up and down, trying to figure out what to do with him. How does one stop a glitch from taking over his body? Because if it were him, he would expel Eclipse from his head. Now, normally he’s not the kind of robot to wish a shut down on anyone…but it’s a little hard to keep yourself passive when you’ve been hit with a thundering headache all day.

Sun sat himself down for a moment as he stayed lost in thought. There had to be some way to get through to Eclipse. At least, some sort of tactic to buy himself some time. He tried to think of what he would do if Moon had been bothering him. Though, Moon had NEVER stooped so low as to cause him physical pain and psychological torment. Though, there were a few times when Moon would play pranks on him or scare him…

Sun smiled slightly as he remembered those moments. Moon is such an evil prankster. And yet, he’s also quite vengeful when given the chance. The amount of times Moon had tickled him after Sun had tried to prank him back, is impossible to count on just two hands. Moon is a brutal tickle monster when provided an opportunity. And yet when it comes to Sun…He’s unbelievably playful and passive. It’s…actually really sweet.

“What?” Eclipse spoke up.

Sun widened his eyes slightly as he looked up at Eclipse. “Oh nothing…” Sun replied a little too casually.

Eclipse was now staring at him, slightly unnerved. “What…are you planning?”

Sun’s smile widened just enough to be noticeable. “You’ll see…Very, very soon.” He muttered in an almost villainous tone.

Eclipse sighed and laid himself onto the floor. “Whatever…Don’t care.”

Sun smirked as he saw the perfect opportunity to strike. He walked himself closer. “You said you wanted something to do, right?” Sun asked.

“Uhhh…Yeah?” Eclipse slowly turned his head to look at him…only for him to regret it the second he saw those wiggling fingers.

Uh oh…

“I think I have the perfect thing to play…” He heard from Sun.

He widened his eyes with slight fear. Oh god…

“Hmm? What’s that look for?” Sun asked rather menacingly.

…Oh god no… “S-Sun?” Eclipse stuttered, the look of fear worsening.

“What’s wrong, Eclipse?” Sun asked him. He moved a few steps closer. “Is someone…ticklish?” He asked.

That was all it took. Eclipse did a full 180 turn and booked it like his life depended on it. “SUN, LET’S TALK ABOUT THIS!” He shouted.

“Nah.” Sun replied in an eerily easygoing tone.

Eclipse slowed his running to a stop the moment he realized how far Sun’s voice had been with that last ‘Nah’. He turned around and was taken aback by Sun’s chasing tactic:

Sun wasn’t chasing him. He wasn’t even running! Sun was skipping! Actually skipping around like a little toddler skipping through the meadows! Any other time, it would’ve been adorable! But right now? The skipping made things even more anxiety-inducing! Was Sun…toying with him?!

Eclipse wasn’t sure what to do. With Sun just skipping his way around the code room, running felt like too extreme of an action. But…He couldn’t just sit there! He needed to keep away from the crazy daycare attendant threatening to tickle him!

The only thing he could think of doing was talking to him. “S-Sun please stop!” Eclipse tried to reason with him.

“Oh now you wanna reason with me?” Sun asked, pausing for a moment with his usual genuine, yet slightly eerie grin.

“Yes! Anything to stop you from trying to tickle me!” Eclipse reacted.

“Tickle you?” Sun tapped his own chin as he pretended to think. “Now why would I do such a thing?”

“I-” Eclipse growled. “YOU TELL ME!”

“Hmmm…Maybe it was because you were trying to take me over all day.” Sun explained in an off-hand way. “Or maybe it was because of the overwhelming headache I had been getting due to someone changing up my coding.” Sun also explained.

“I-I didn’t know tampering with your code would give you a headache!” Eclipse argued.

“Hmmm…Is that so?” Sun walked himself closer. “Y-Y-Yeah! H-Honest!” Eclipse put up his hands in arrest. “P-Please…”

Sun reached out his arms as he got closer and closer to the different-colored daycare attendant. Eclipse looked super nervous. What does he do?! Is Sun gonna tickle him? Or is he gonna tell him something? Does he run again? Does he reason with him some more? Or does he take it? So many questions, and little to no answers in so little time! Fearing the worst, Eclipse closed his eyes and braced for impact…

…

“Boop!”

“eeEEEK!” Eclipse hugged his side and doubled over.

“Ho ho HO!” Sun let out in the same signature tone. “Looks like Clipsy IS ticklish!” Sun declared. “This MUST be investigated!”

In no time at all, Eclipse felt the giggles overwhelm him the moment Sun’s fingers made contact. As Sun would quickly find out, it wouldn’t take much to get Eclipse to laugh. Just a few pokes to his thin belly would make him jump and guffaw. That, followed by a few flutters to the neck, followed up by a few scritches to his rays, were all it took to make Eclipse curl up and giggle like a little child. “EEheeheehee! Wahahait! nonono dohohon’t!” He reacted, wiggling his rays in an attempt to stop Sun’s nimble fingers.

“My goodness, you’re more ticklish than I thought! It’s funny, I almost want to forgive you!” Sun admitted.

“Ihihi’ll nehehever forgihihive yohou!” Eclipse shot back.

Sun chuckled. “Funny how you think you still have control over me.” Sun teased. “If you had been more polite, maybe I would’ve gone easier on you!” Sun sighed. “But I guess that would be asking too much from you.” He concluded.

Eclipse tried to move his rays away from Sun’s agile fingers. But this did pretty much nothing. All it did was give Sun more rays to tickle. “Suhuhun plehehehease-” Eclipse squeaked as he felt yet another ray being scratched. “NAHAHA! DOHOHOHON’T!”

Sun gasped. “Oh my god- The back of your rays are worse?!” Sun reacted.

“YEHEHEHES! CUT IT OHOHOUT!” Eclipse tried to push him away. “STOHOHOHOP!”

“Oh Clipsy, Clipsy, Clipsy…” Sun dodged his hands and kept on tickling. “You can push all you want to. I dare you to try and push me off!” Sun added. “But we both know it won’t work.” He teased.

Eclipse, thinking he could still get away, started covering up his rays instead. Maybe with no rays available, Eclipse couldn’t be tickled so vigorously.

“Goodness me! What a move!” Sun reacted rather dramatically. “Looks like I’ll have to go somewhere else…” Sun started to stroke his chin similarly to an adult with a beard. “Where else should I go next…” Sun asked aloud.

Eclipse stared at Sun. “Are you…playing with me?” He asked.

“Me? Playing? Oh no no no!” Sun said in the most playful voice possible. “Sun would NEVER play! Especially when it comes to something as serious as a takeover! That would NeVeR happen!” He kept on saying sarcastically.

Eclipse was too busy staring at Sun, to fully comprehend his words. But he could very easily read his tone and facial expressions quite clearly…

And holy crap…He’d never seen Sun act like this before! Not even with Moon! And Eclipse had been observing their relationship from within Sun’s mind for several months now! He was only now starting to take over Sun’s body!

‘So why is Sun acting like this with me?!’ Eclipse thought to himself.

“I thought you’d never ask!” Sun declared, reading his mind.

Wait, WHAT?! HE HEARD THAT?!

Sun giggled and raised Eclipse’s chin. “Because it’s funny seeing you stumble and fall while executing your mission! You’ve been so busy trying to take over my body, that you haven’t even taken the time to realize who you were messing with!” Sun declared.

Eclipse widened his eyes as an electronic shiver went up his spine. Okay…maybe he underestimated Sun.

“Oh! And I know what tickle spot to go for now!” Sun declared.

Wait, NO!

Suddenly, Eclipse felt a hand grip his knee joint…and in no time at all, Eclipse felt himself get flipped upside down. “aAH! Sun, stop! What are you doing?!”

Sun giggled. “It’s obvious, really. You are a small part of Moon’s code! Isn’t that right?” Sun asked.

“Y-Yes, but-”

“Then you’d have at least 1 similar tickle spot to Moon!” Sun declared rather happily. But his demeanor quickly changed the moment Sun raised his hand up so he could see Eclipse eye-to-eye. “And that’s perfect for me…because I happen to know Moon like the back of my hand.” He mentioned.

Eclipse tried to knee Sun with his free leg. “Damn you!” He shouted.

Sun caught his other knee with no issue at all…almost like he was planning for Eclipse to kick him. Sun moved it out of the way slightly as he made a clicking sound. “That’s not very nice, is it?” He said, staring into his soul. “Physical violence? AND bad words?!” Sun lowered his hand and flipped Eclipse around so his face was looking away from Sun. “You’re just begging for it, aren’t you?”

Eclipse gulped. “B-Begging for what?”

Sun laughed as he grabbed slightly below both knee joints with only one hand. “Oh! Begging for tickles of course!” Sun declared. “And my favorite little tickle spot to go to when Moon’s being extra mischievous…” He brought his fingers closer. “-Happens to be the back of these special little knees.” With that little mention, Sun started fluttering and scratching his evil little fingers against the pit of the right knee first. “Right about here.” He added.

Eclipse gasped before throwing his head back with a yelp. He wheezed and covered his mouth, attempting to prevent Sun from getting what he wants: Confirmation. But oh god, was it difficult! The desperation to laugh was almost agonizing! But the last thing he wanted was for Sun to figure out that he and Moon share a tickle spot! Maybe if he holds out long enough, he’ll stop!

“Oh?” Sun looked down, and noticed Eclipse’s hand placement. A little smirk filled his face. Ooooh, he could have fun with this~

Sun looked up. “I guess this one isn’t very ticklish, huh?” Sun asked, acting none-the-wiser. “Maybe this other knee is worse?” Sun asked as he switched to his left knee pit.

Not expecting this change, Eclipse accidentally let out a whimper and a snort. Widening his eyes, he tightened his grip on his own mouth and began to pray that Sun didn’t hear him break.

Oh, but Sun heard it. He heard it loud and clear. But why let Eclipse know that, when he could continue to toy with him instead? That sounds so much more fun! “Looks like this one isn’t very ticklish either!” Sun reacted, moving his fingers away. “I could’ve sworn they could be ticklish!” Sun exclaimed as he stroked his chin.

Eclipse let out a slow, but comforting breath. God, that was close…But did he do it? Did he convince Sun that he’s not ticklish?!

“Well that’s a shame…looks like I was wrong.” Sun mumbled aloud. “I guess you’re not ticklish there like I thought.” Sun added.

Eclipse was flabbergasted. He couldn’t believe it! It worked! It actually worked!!

Oh…but Eclipse quickly realized the truth…and it was all revealed to him the moment he felt skittering fingers against both pits of his knees.

“BWAHAHAHAHA!” Eclipse tried to reach up to stop him. “WAHAIT!” He shouted.

“Sorry Clipsy~” Sun watched Eclipse crash down the moment his fingers moved primarily to the right knee pit. “But liars don’t get to have mercy! At least, not yet~” He teased more.

“aAAAHAHAHAHAHA! DAHAHAHAMMIHIT!” He threw his head back with a long, slightly evil cackle.

“Ooooh! So it looks like those eeeevil cackles of yours are more genuine than I expected!” Sun reacted.

“SHUHUT UHUP! YOHOHOHOU-” Eclipse screeched as the left knee pit was attacked next.

“Ah ah ah, Careful of your words, Clipsy~” Sun teased. “We don’t want you overdoing yourself, do we?” Sun warned in a playful tone. And yet, that playful tone almost made the warning sound a lot more intimidating. Whether this was his intention, is up for debate.

But all Eclipse could worry about was how overwhelmingly tickly this was. Everything in him wanted to fight him and get out of this as quickly as possible. But the other part of him knew that resisting may make Sun go worse on him. And on another hand…

This punishment could’ve been a lot worse…He had to give Sun credit where credit was due. Never in his mind, would Eclipse even think about using tickling to subdue someone. And…Oh my god, it actually works! And it almost makes him want to take the idea and use it against Sun. Maybe with this strategy, Eclipse could weaken Sun enough to take control of his body and follow through with his original plan. But for now, Eclipse could feel himself getting tired. So as much as he hates resorting to such extremes, he needs to ask for mercy or beg for him to stop.

“HAHAHAHA! SUHUHUN! MEHER-MERCYHYHYHYHY!” He shouted at him.

“Oh, what was that?” Sun reacted with shock.

“MEHEHERRCYHYHY! PLEHEHEHEASE STOHOHOHOP!” He yelled to Sun.

Sun chuckled and stopped his fingers. “Fine, fine. You can have a break.” He gently lifted Eclipse up by his back, and placed him onto the ground of the headspace. “Are you done with your special takeover?” Sun asked.

“Yeah…I’m done.” Eclipse said with a hidden little smirk. He’s not really done. He’s just saying what Sun would like to hear, so Eclipse can get away without pushback. “I won’t try to take over.” He looked down more. ‘Yet.’ He said in his mind.

Though Sun heard his extra word, he still accepted his decision. “Alright.” He muttered, breathing a sigh of relief. Though he knew the takeover would come eventually, Sun was just glad he had gotten the code under temporary control. This would give him more than enough time to come up with other ways to stop Eclipse’s eventual takeover.

Sun took over his body again, and turned himself on. He opened his beady white eyes, and looked around the room. It looked like he was…on his couch in their hidden bedroom.

Wait…didn’t he shut himself down in the main daycare? Why is he on his couch? How did he get to his bedroom?

Sun pulled himself off the couch, and noticed the blue blanket around his chest. And on the blanket, was a note:

[Hi Sun. Found you sleeping in the daycare. Guess you didn’t make it to bed, huh?

Good night Sun.

~Moon🌙]

#pre-redemption eclipse #fighting for control #inner dialogue #evil plans #intimidation #mind games #sun and moon are siblings #ticklefic #ler!sun #lee!eclipse #brotherly love

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all-pacas · 4 months

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stupid chase 13 self indulgent sibling shit:

13 is the first one to jokingly refer to chase as her brother. except she calls him her younger brother. chase is like super touched but also hi i'm older than you "sure you are buddy". it's like an ironic "haha we're not actually siblings" joke except secretly no. it's not ironic

13 also has made at least a couple "let's go find dad" jokes about house. she finds it funny and deeply annoying that house and chase don't seem to Get It. it's very obvious to her that chase's deepest dream is for house to pat his shoulder and say "i'm proud my son" but they deny it

at least once 13 has pat chase's shoulder and gone "i'm proud my son"

at least once though. at least one time. "i killed my older brother." "i abandoned my younger sister to rehab." like they know. all their darkest shit. they don't want to be siblings because they did terrible things to their families. but it's why they are

they text. she's constantly sending him photos from her greek island. the food. the beach. look how hot my girlfriend is. he's in the middle of some gross procedure and gets a text of a beautiful sunset. he sends back a photo of a urine sample or some gross wound

when chase quit at the end of s8 and 13 swung by the next episode to talk with wilson the next day? she was staying with chase while she was in town. they mostly just hung out and watched nature documentaries. when wilson called she was like "oh i just happen to be in new jersey, let's meet up" while wearing sweats and sitting on chase's sofa

chase offers to kill her since house is gone and can't. they come up with a rough timeline and plan and then never discuss it again. until it's time.

at least a few dark "oh, shit, i'm wilson now, aren't i?" jokes from her in return. shit, the new house has a dying best friend too! except with so much less sexual tension!! they joke because they can't bring themselves to be serious about it. she tries to set him up with new friends. big advocate for choreman

idk but i get the feeling they'd watch crappy reality tv together.

they'll sometimes just have the darkest and most serious 1 am conversations about morality and souls and what makes a person good or evil, and then the next time they see one another instead of following up it's just "did you see real housewives last night"

chase has never asked 13 for a favor. like he'll ask her little things or let her pay for lunch, but that's about it. meanwhile she can call him at 2 am and he'll show up no questions asked. maybe kind of grumpy about it tho. kind of pisses her off he never lets her return the favor and sort of shut himself off emotionally after s6. but also it's nice? not the "chase's turn towards cynicism" part, but having a standing no questions asked deal.

when he annoys her enough, 13 DOES call chase "robbie" or worse "bobby" but he's never called her by her first name and probably never will

he didn't tell her he got stabbed and she was mad about it because see above. that was a real bobby day

chase knows she doesn't want to fuck around with more huntington's trials but he reads EVERY article and EVERY journal, just in case some miracle comes up. 13 meanwhile follows fake african country politics with a weird intensity to make sure diabla's forces aren't regaining power. they never discuss either thing with one another.

first time 13 visited Chase MD office she forced him to pose in front of the door and took like 15 photos like it was bobby's first day of school. absolutely humiliating

chase goes to 13 and amy's wedding. he's the only one of the PPTH folks who do (taub sends a card. they forgot to tell foreman.)

once 13 was like "we're both hot and single and should do what hot, single people do!" "....have...sex...?" "no, go to a gay bar" they actually go quite a few times

#hate crimes md #robert chase #remy thirteen hadley

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wen-kexing-apologist · 1 year

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Taking Pause for Reflection- Part 1: Respectable Promiscuity and Only Friends

Well we are three marvelous episodes into Only Friends, and are already seeing the ways in which the narrative is making preparations to sow chaos in every single character’s life. By this point we have seen numerous examples of Boston fucking with Mew’s relationship, watched Top hook up with Boston, took note of Ray’s reliance on alcohol, his drinking and driving, and how he abandons his games with Sand the second he can play hero for Mew, and we’ve already unlocked Nick’s #hotgirlespionage era. In short, we are getting complex, messy, shitty, realistic, and three dimensional queer people on our screens.

As we all continue on our Only Friends journey, I think it is vitally important to look at the research that has been done on the subject of representations of queer people, and understand recurring themes in engagement with queer communities that I have personally seen being repeated in the reactions some people are having to the queer characters in Only Friends.

Disclaimer: I am a Westerner, writing this from a Western gay lens, with Western sources, and primarily targeting the Western BL audience with this essay. That said, I would love to hear other people’s, non Westerners especially, thoughts on the themes I will be discussing here.

Anyway…

On the Subject of the Acceptable Queer and Respectable Promiscuity

To make sure anyone who reads this is on the same page, I just want to define the term respectable promiscuity

Respectable: Decent or correct in behavior or character (Miriam-Webster)

Promiscuity: having or involving multiple sex partners: not restricted to one or few sex partners (Miriam-Webster)

Respectable Promiscuity as defined by Jody Ahlm, “captures the negotiations individuals engage in as they enact stigmatized sexual practices, manage sexual reputations, and give meaning to their sexual practices within a specific sociopolitical context.” (2017)

Or in my understanding, how people cope with and justify the sex they have that society may see as morally wrong. Because so much of our world has been captured by this idea that sex, especially non-monogamous sex, sex outside of wedlock, or queer sex is inherently wrong or sinful, it is far more likely that queer people will be accepted by society if they are at the very least perceived to be engaging in respectable sex (aka monogamous, moderated, and more vanilla sexual practices).

…According to this [sexual value system], sex that is ‘good’,’normal’, and ‘natural’ should ideally be heterosexual, marital, monogamous, reproductive, and non-commercial. It should be coupled, relational, within the same generation, and occur at home. It should not involve pornography, fetish objects, sex toys of any sort, or roles other than male and female. Any sex that violates these rules is ‘bad’, ‘abnormal’, or ‘unnatural’. Bad sex may be homosexual, unmarried, promiscuous, non-procreative, or commercial. It may be masturbatory or take place at orgies, may be casual, may cross generational lines, and may take place in ‘public’, or at least in the bushes or the baths. It may involve the use of pornography, fetish objects, sex toys, or unusual roles. (Rubin, 1984)

Late last week I posted a whole essay on cruising culture in the queer community, and the possibility that Boston is a physical manifestation of historical queer cultural practices (a theme that I see continuing in Ep 3 simply with the kind of car that he drives). As part of that I talked about how the combination of the AIDS epidemic and the creation of mobile apps like Grindr have greatly contributed to the reduction in cruising culture, something similar can be said of the creation of respectable promiscuity: “The stigma of promiscuity in gay male culture has roots in the respectability politics of internal responses to AIDS, as well as homophobic responses from outside the community, and continues to haunt discourses of gay male sexuality.” (Ahlm, 2017)

I think a lot about media and media influence on personal beliefs and perceptions, after all media is political. There is a reason that when I think about and talk about media, I am in some capacity thinking about who the audience is and who a film was made for. How many queer films were truly made for queer people? I mean, seriously, think about how many movies and television shows over the past few decades that either were about or included queer people ended in tragedy. Those films aren’t meant for us, they are meant to show heterosexual people the struggles of being queer. We are meant to be shown suffering so that heterosexual people may, hopefully, learn to have some sympathy for queer people. Brokeback Mountain, for example, wasn’t made for queer people, if it was the promotional material would not have straight-baited the audience, if it was we would not have had to watch Jack Twist get beaten to death for being a faggot.

Historical queer activism was fighting for far far more than just marriage equality, but over time marriage equality has become the most popularized and pervasive queer civil rights fight. Now the repeated theme we hear over and over again, a message that a lot of the BLs and QLs are pushing, is marriage equality. We see it in Not Me, Moonlight Chicken, Cutie Pie, The Wedding Planner, Love in the Air, GAP, etc. etc. as a result, if we see sex in a show, we see generally pure, and if not pure certainly monogamous sex in most BLs. While a production company like GMMTV may have some of their talent switch gay pairings (looking at you Mark Pakin, Fluke Pusit, and pre-Khao era First) once they find a pairing that is popular and profitable to them, they rarely split them up across their other shows but especially not within the same show. Truly, we have seen the main pairs mix and matching in shows how many times? Two? Three? Off the top of my head I can only think of…

Earth with Papang and Mix with First in Moonlight Chicken

*gestures vaguely at all of Only Friends*

All of this to say:

In the past two decades, marriage equality has been pushed to the front of LGBT organizing and with it the imperative of appearing ‘‘just like them(heterosexuals),’’ through sexual moderation, monogamy and the disavowal of deviant sexual subcultures. This assimilationist discourse is the foundation of homonormativity and the current politics of respectability in LGBT communities…‘‘Homonormativity’’ is a term Lisa Duggan (2003) uses to describe the assimilationist politics of the contemporary gay and lesbian movement that emphasizes individualism and sexual restraint. (Ahlm, 2017)

Which is a long-winded way of saying that in pushing for traditionally heterosexual practices, and general societal acceptance, representations of queer people have had to be pared down to seem less sexually liberated than our community may actually be (and just look at the way the aspects of queer culture like drag and like…just existing as a trans person are being increasingly associated with sex, sexual deviancy, and then warped in to pedophilia and sex crime narratives in order to turn society at large against us to make it easier to discriminate and eliminate us).

I am not sure how marriage equality was argued in other countries, but I do know that Obergefell v. Hodges, which granted marriage equality in the United States, was argued on the basis of privacy (and is also why people are fucking terrified at the reversal of Roe v. Wade, because that was also successfully won initially on the argument of privacy and was used as a precedent to win future cases like Obergefell). Which means that in arguing for gay marriage to be legally recognized, in order to get the rights that are afforded to us through marriage, we had to shift queer culture in to the spaces and definitions of privacy, rather than the public spaces that were foundational to historical queer culture.

As the Lawrence ruling and the LGBT movement’s focus on marriage equality suggest, mainstream acceptance of gays and lesbians has thus far hinged on the sanctity of domestic privacy and the legitimacy of monogamous relationships. The success of this political strategy has brought about a dramatic shift in public opinion and legal recognition for same-sex couples in the USA, culminating in the Obergefell v. Hodges (2015) Supreme Court decision that extended marriage rights to same-sex couples throughout the country. This acceptance, though, is conditioned on creating a public image of group maturation where being gay is no longer associated with a sexual culture of promiscuity, bathhouses, outdoor cruising areas, and porn theatres. Language of sexual autonomy or sexual freedom has been replaced with the conventional wisdom that ‘‘what you do in the privacy of your own home is your business.’’(Ahlm, 2017)

TL;DR: Homophobia and the AIDS epidemic contributed to a decrease in historical queer cultural practices of public and semi-public, non-monogamous sex practices and the push for rights like marriage equality further contributed to the queer community being pushed towards privacy about their sex lives, resulting in representation of queer culture shifting to the image of the monogamous, sexually moderated, non-kinky homosexual.

Homonormativity, like heteronormativity, privileges whiteness. Homonormativity produces a systemic policing of sexuality and gender, in part through a politics of representation that erases queers of color, poor and working-class queers, and gender non-conforming queers. Guided by an ‘‘ethics of sexual shame’’ (Warner, 2000) the contemporary LGBT movement distances itself from sexual deviants, and more generally from sex itself (Duggan, 2003; Robinson, 2005; Rubin, 1993). (Ahlm, 2017)

A huge part of what got me hooked on Asian BL was seeing representations of queer people that were not just white men with power. Getting to watch two people navigate the political nature of their queerness in conjunction with their socioeconomic status, seeing just the most casual inclusion of trans women (something that like never happens in Western media). Part of what got me so obsessed with KinnPorsche as my first Thai BL was the existence of Yok, who has 0% of a plot about being trans and 100% of a plot around being a surrogate mother to Porsche and just a generally massive party girl. A reason why I like shows like Bed Friend and The Warp Effect so much is because they actually include kink in their shows. (Even though Bed Friend only really does it once with the pet play in Ep. 6 still with monogamous sex, and Jojo can only get away with heavy kink focus in TWE through a heterosexual couple.)

Finding BL gave me ways to see a lot of different flavors of queers, different dynamics between queers, while still being made to cater primarily towards heterosexual audiences. How many queer romances exist in the West? Big Eden (my beloved), two Christmas movies and the butchered corpse of Red, White, and Royal Blue? [do not come for me here, I know there are more, I have a whole syllabus from @bengiyo that has more than that on it, my point is mostly looking at how popular and increasingly, rapidly abundant and easily accessible gay romance is in BLs compared to how popular abundant gay romance is the West]. I loved Gay OK Bangkok because it gave accurate and honest depictions of three-dimensional queer characters, not two-dimensional, spoon-fed perfect gay men. I loved The Eclipse because it gave me extremely morally gray, queer characters. I loved 3 Will Be Free for both the representations of polyamory, and also for the humanity that Jojo allowed Mae to have.

TL;DR Current LGBTQ+ political movements have started shifting away from highlighting sexual liberation as an aspect of queer culture, in order to make ourselves more palatable to the overarching heterosexual society. This bleeds through in to the kinds of media that exist, the types of queer people portrayed within that media, as well as how often gay sex is shown, the type of gay sex shown, and the number of gay sex partners depicted. (Read: generally infrequently, generally vanilla, generally one).

How Respectable Promiscuity Ties in to Only Friends

IT DOESN’T! Jojo, Ninew, Den, and the rest of the team are not interested in creating a story that takes audience perceptions of respectable promiscuity into consideration. All the boys are thirsty, all the boys are fucking, Boston is promiscuous as hell, Top is (potentially) a slut (or at least a former slut), Sand has been in multiple relationships and has had multiple one-night stand sexual partners (no repeats). Mew is maybe not as virginal as he has led us to believe. Every time any gay boy is standing next to another gay boy that they didn’t know like a week before, a third gay person is wiggling their eyebrows like “oh how do you two know each other?” (aka, you fucked?) See: Nick to Boston and Top, Sand to Boston and Nick, Yo to Ray and Sand, Mew to Ray and Sand.

Sex has been and will continue to be abundant in this show. Jojo himself said “[Sex] is coming every episode…I’m screaming for Prince but I love gay slut too. No matter slut or good person they should be equally represented”

There have been no allusions to the contrary. Jojo has presented this as a bacchanal from the beginning. The pilot trailer has multiple sex and/or make out sessions, indications of cheating, First with a goddamn bat, pills, screaming, and crying.

The actual promotional trailer had: multiple sex and/or make out sessions, indications of cheating, First raining destruction down upon some glassware, pills, screaming, and crying.

The interviews with the cast members about why we should watch Only Friends had Neo saying Boston was an asshole, and you should watch Only Friends because it’s hot. In those same interviews Force said he was looking forward to everyone hating him. The playlist that Jojo made ages ago for this show has so many songs about sex, drugs, being cheated on, and breaking up. Jojo tweeted months ago that he had a meeting with the GMMTV office and he had permission to do whatever he wanted. Jojo and co have never once pulled the wool over our eyes as for what to expect from the physical intimacy in this show. We have been promised a sex fest, and we are getting a sex fest. We have been promised some form of a cheating plot line, and we are getting some form of a cheating plot line. We have been promised substance use issues, and we are getting substance use issues.

Yet on tumblr I am seeing discomfort and as a result, alteration of character motivation and action, around behaviors these characters exhibit that result in sex.

...Western cultures generally consider sex to be a dangerous, destructive, negative force (Weeks, 1981, p. 22). Most Christian tradition, following Paul, holds that sex is inherently sinful. It may be redeemed if performed within marriage for procreative purposes and if the pleasurable aspects are not enjoyed too much. In turn, this idea rests on the assumption that genitalia are an intrinsically inferior part of the body, much lower and less holy than the mind, the ‘soul’, the ‘heart’...Such notions have by now acquired a life of their own and no longer depend solely on religion for their perseverance.

This culture always treats sex with suspicion. It construes and judges almost any sexual practice in terms of its worst possible expression. Sex is presumed guilty until proven innocent. Virtually all erotic behavior is considered bad unless a specific reason to exempt it has been established. The most acceptable excuses are marriage, reproduction, and love. Sometimes scientific curiosity, aesthetic experience, or a long-term intimate relationship may serve. (Rubin, 1984)

Boston is not a terrible person for cruising for sex, Boston is not a terrible person for being a slut, Boston is not a terrible person for not wanting to deepen his relationship with Nick beyond just having sex with him. What does make Boston kinda shitty is the fact that he manipulates people to get what he wants, strings Nick’s feelings along, and uses captured images and films of his friends and uses that to call their moral character into question.

Nick is not pure of heart and dumb of ass for enjoying sex with Boston or for wanting to define his relationship to Boston. Subjectively, his actions for acquiring sex with Boston the first time (aka adding his photo to Boston’s phone) is a gay wrong we support for the chaos, objectively that is a massive invasion of privacy the likes of which rival Boston holding on to photos and videos of Ray and Mew together for two years. Subjectively, it is a power play from Nick to have wiretapped Boston’s car to catch him hooking up with another person and I am excited for Boston to potentially see some consequences as a result of this. Objectively this is once again a massive invasion of privacy, and it is entirely possible there will be a lot of fallout as a result of the evidence Nick just acquired, despite the fact that objectively Top and Boston did nothing wrong.

Boston never committed to monogamy, and Top and Mew never officially defined their relationship as boyfriends (yes, I know Top calls Mew his boyfriend at the bar, but he is saying that to someone he wants to stop hitting on him) and we have seen no conversations around whether or not they are exclusive. Is it maybe kinda shitty that Top fucked Boston this far in to trying to become Mew’s boyfriend? Probably. But Top is not an inherently terrible person for having sex with Boston, nor is he an unwilling or inactive participant being pressured into having a second round with Boston (he even initiates the kiss).

On the opposite end, Mew is not perfect or immune from doing or causing harm in the past, present, or future just because he is withholding sex from Top. Mew isn’t dumb or naive, he doesn’t need protecting, he knows what game he might be in, and he is playing it to the best of his ability. Jojo and co are incredibly talented at writing complex characters, the fact that Mew is possibly a virgin, the fact that Mew is aware that sex for him means something deeper than sex might mean for Boston does not mean Mew should be placed on a pedestal of purity.

Much like I think Boston is a physical manifestation of older queer culture, I think Mew may be a physical manifestation of more current beliefs around queer people:

As a result of the sex conflicts of the last decade, some behavior near the border is inching across it. Unmarried couples living together, masturbation, and some forms of homosexuality are moving in the direction of respectability (see Figure 9.2). Most homosexuality is still on the bad side of the line. But if it is coupled and monogamous, then society is beginning to recognize that it includes the full range of human interaction. (Rubin, 1984)

Mew is absolutely playing games with Top, he has said that himself, about holding out long enough to see if Top genuinely cares about him rather than just wants a virgin to conquer. But he has also stated that he knows that if he has sex with Top that he will become obsessed. He wants to know Top, and care about Top as a person, and know that Top cares about him as a person before he will have sex. Everyone around Mew is obsessed with his sex life, desperate for him to lose his virginity, desperate for him to join them on the other side of the line. So many of the other queer characters are trying to publicize Mew’s gay sex life, (including Top who publicly asked him to be his boyfriend), while Mew desperately tries to maintain the depiction of purity that his friends think he is. Which is to say, where Boston is cruising for casual sex, and frequently engaging in public sex, Mew is maintaining respectability and looking for long-term and intimate private sex.

(Also a tangential thought, but I don’t remember Ray saying anything about Mew’s need to lose his virginity, I think that has really only been Boston, Cheum, Yo in part, and even Top have all had discussions around Mew’s virginity or need to have his first sexual encounter).

Conclusion

I want to end on this quote:

Most people find it difficult to grasp that whatever they like to do sexually will be thoroughly repulsive to someone else, and that whatever repels them sexually will be the most treasured delight of someone, somewhere. One need not like or perform a particular sex act in order to recognize that someone else will, and that this difference does not indicate a lack of good taste, mental health, or intelligence in either party. Most people mistake their sexual preferences for a universal system that will or should work for everyone. (Rubin, 1984)

I hope as we proceed through this story, and more characters fuck, get fucked, and fuck up that we are able to interact with the source material and connect with the characters as they are presented on screen, not with what we have shaped them to be in our heads. I hope we are able to separate from the mindset of respectable promiscuity, and refrain from placing false perceptions of purity or morality to characters who do or do not uphold heterosexual society’s understanding of what a good homosexual is supposed to be. Only Friends has never lied to us, the characters might have, the way their dynamics play out might subvert our expectations, but the subject matter, the level of heat, the commitment of gay wrongs is what this show was always going to be. I don’t know about y’all but I am here to sit back, watch my BL boys commit as many gay wrongs as possible within 12 episodes, and write overly academic pieces on sex, sexuality, and queerness in Only Friends for the bit.

Stay tuned for Part 2 where I discuss racism and the commodification of queer men of color.

Sources

Ahlm, Jody (2017) Respectable promiscuity: Digital cruising in an era of queer liberalism, Sexualities, DOI: 10.1177/1363460716665783

Chong-suk Han (2007) They Don't Want To Cruise Your Type: Gay

Men of Color and the Racial Politics of Exclusion, Social Identities, 13:1, 51-67, DOI:

10.1080/13504630601163379

Rubin, Gayle (1984) The Thinking Sex: Notes for a Radical Theory of the Politics of Sexuality- Chapter 9: The Sex Wars.

Acknowledgements

I would like to thank @bengiyo, @emotionallychargedtowel, @lurkingshan, @so-much-yet-to-learn, and @waitmyturtles for reading through this post, adding your thoughts, and helping with edits! Y'all are the best

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jae-bummer · 1 year

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Good Hair Day

Request: For your request prompts, would you please do a Soulmate AU with Hoshi from Seventeen? I don’t find very many fluffy, happy Hoshi stories. That man has such beautiful eyes and I LOVE when he has plushy cheeks! It makes me want to give him a kiss and a cuddle. I was also very impressed with his humble attitude and manners when he was on Suga’s Suchwita episode. Sorry for rambling and thanks in advance. 😋

Prompt:

11) Soulmate AU

If you dye your hair, your soulmate's hair color changes as well.

Pairing: Seventeen Hoshi x Reader

Genre: Fluff

It was only 6 AM when Hoshi was forced to roll out of bed for his schedule. Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, he eased himself from his warm blankets and made his way toward the bathroom.

"Nice hair," Coups laughed, emerging into the hallway at the same time Hoshi stepped from his room.

Headed in the opposite direction, Hoshi stumbled into the older member and grumbled a sleepy "shut up."

So what if his morning hair was a nightmare? That was the case for almost every single one of the guys in this group (Seungcheol included). All he had to do was throw on a hoodie and patiently wait for his turn in the stylist's chair.

Shouldering his way into the bathroom, Hoshi stood before the sink and groaned.

Not again.

Blinking hazily at his own reflection, he plopped his forehead against the cool surface. Out of all days, why did his soulmate pick TODAY to go cotton candy pink?

"Seize the day!" you cackled, smoothing on another layer of hair dye.

"You are unhinged," your best friend, Ash, laughed from her spot on the toilet lid. "And I kind of like it."

"This person," you continued slowly. "Has been dying their hair nearly every other month since I've known them."

"Well, you don't know them," Ash interrupted. "But go on."

"Oh, I know them alright," you muttered.

For what had been the better part of the last ten years, your hair color had changed as often as the weather. You were responsible for approximately two of those changes, and they were both out of necessity. Job interviews were a mandatory life occasion, and your soulmate would have to get over having brown hair for a few months. Mint green would not be getting either of you hired anytime soon.

Which made you wonder, what exactly did your soulmate do for a living? How did they get away with having such vibrant fashion colors in everyday life? Why did your soulmate seem to have the biggest commitment issues with something as simple as hair?

"I'm only giving them a taste of their own medicine," you sighed, finally setting down the tinting brush. Examining your work, you nodded in satisfaction. "Let's see how their boss reacts to this when they wake up tomorrow."

"Maybe they're a hairdresser?" Ash theorized as she watched your slow decent into madness. "Oooh, or maybe a clown for children's parties?"

"A clown?" you cringed. "I like your enthusiasm, but could we go for something more..."

"Aspirational?" she laughed. "Sure, Y/N. Maybe they're a famous musician and after you meet them, you won't have to worry about anything besides ugly hair colors ever again."

"If they were famous, I would have clocked them by now," you grumbled. "I haven't seen Harry Styles walking around with fire engine red hair."

"You haven't seen Harry Styles walking around in general," Ash laughed. "Give yourself, and your soulmate, the benefit of the doubt."

...

"I need an adult!" Hoshi screeched across the dorm. The sun had hardly risen, and he was already launching into panic mode. "Like an adultier adult! Someone who has a much better handle on adult life and adult problems!"

"It doesn't take much," Jeonghan croaked. Collapsing onto the couch, he rubbed at his eyes before glancing up at the pacing Hoshi. "Holy shit, have you ever seen the Trolls movie? Because your head-"

Hoshi stopped his pacing and pointed an accusatory finger at his member. "I am very sensitive right now. Choose your words carefully."

Jeonghan leveled a stare in his direction. "Fine. If I don't have something nice to say, I won't say anything at all."

"Well, we both know that's a lie," Hoshi muttered as he went back to pacing. "What do I do? How do I fix this?"

"Alright first, I need you to calm down," Jeonghan nodded. "Second, I'd like you to make me a cup of coffee."

Throwing a dirty look over his shoulder, Hoshi continued to stomp back and forth.

"Fine," Jeonghan groaned. "Get me my wallet."

"Why am I going to get your wallet?" Hoshi argued. "What is your wallet going to do for the disaster on my head? We have a shoot today and the concept is going to be ruined and it's going to be all my-"

"If you stopped to take a breath," Jeonghan interrupted. "I would tell you that I have a business card inside said wallet. On that business card is the information for a very talented hairdresser who takes hair emergencies very seriously."

Dropping to his knees, Hoshi clasped his hands together. "You are not the hero I deserve, but a hero nonetheless."

"I'm pretty sure that's not how the quote goes, and I'm mildly offended for some reason?" Jeonghan said, narrowing his eyes.

Already up and rummaging through Jeonghan's wallet, Hoshi yanked out the business card. "I owe you one."

"I'll take that one and use it for a coffee," Jeonghan nodded. "The hair can wait."

....

Strolling down the street, you felt a new sense of freedom wash over you. Your hair had been nearly every color under the rainbow (including the pink you were currently rocking) but nothing had ever felt as good as this. It wasn't as if you had something against your soulmate, it was quite the opposite. You were excited to meet them, whoever they were, but you also wanted them to be surprised by you for once.

Humming to yourself, you decided at the last minute to veer toward a cafe you spotted across the road. For such an adventurous new day, you deserved a little treat.

Just as you began to step off the sidewalk, someone walking in the opposite direction slammed into you.

"Hey!" you yelled, tumbling away from your assailant.

"Shit!" the stranger gasped, immediately leaning down to help you up from the sidewalk. "I was so distracted; I didn't see you coming. I'm so-"

Furrowing your brows, you looked up at the man who was now leaning over you. He was extremely handsome, albeit dressed oddly for the warm spring weather. He wore a black hoodie with the drawstrings pulled as tightly as possible around his angular face. You studied his features for a moment, trying to figure out exactly what was familiar about him.

As your eyes met, he paused and had suddenly gone still. No longer focused on helping you up, it looked as if his mind had gone somewhere a million miles away.

"Uh, hello?" you asked, waving your hand in front of his face. "Random stranger? Helping me off the ground? Did you glitch?"

"Your hair," he chirped. "When did you dye it?"

You could only blink in response as his question sank into you.

"Look man," you said, finally finding your voice. With a few grumbles, you pushed yourself to your feet again and stared down the man who was acting much too odd for your liking. "I'm not sure what your problem is, but-"

Wordlessly, he continued to stare at you as he pulled down the tightened hood of his jacket.

Pink. So pink.

"I'm Hoshi," he said dumbly, a nervous smile playing across his lips. "And I think I need to sit down because I might pass out."

After a short discussion verifying when you had actually dyed your hair and a longer discussion based around your hair history, it was pretty much confirmed. It had taken a decade, but you had finally found each other.

"I never thought this day would happen," you admitted. You felt lightheaded and damn near giddy. It didn't matter if the two of you looked like bright pink idiots in the middle of the street. You had each other now.

"Me either," Hoshi breathed with equal amounts of shock. Seeming to come a bit more to his senses, a little crease formed between his brows. "Do you want to come with me?"

"Uh," you croaked, looking up at him in dismay. You still didn't really know him and didn't necessarily like how open ended his question was.

Shaking his head as if to correct himself, he smiled. "To the hairdresser. Do you want to come with me to the hairdresser?"

"The pink just not doing it for you?" you grinned.

Reaching up, Hoshi tugged playfully at one of your strands. "While I like the color," he nodded. "Very much. Like so much-"

"You don't have to explain!" you laughed. "I get it."

"No really, I love it. If I could be this color pink for the rest of my life-"

"Hoshi," you laughed, placing your hand in the air between the two of you.

"Okay, I have a semi-important work thing today and I need black hair," he smiled sheepishly. "Would you...maybe want to come with me?"

You pretended to think for a moment before nodding. "Of course I would."

"Great! I mean, totally, yeah," Hoshi stumbled awkwardly. "It's only a few blocks away, if you don't mind."

Watching Hoshi be so pleasantly overwhelmed warmed something inside of you. Nodding confidently to himself, he slid his palm into yours and laced your fingers together. "I'm holding my soulmate's hand."

"As am I," you confirmed, trying to ignore the heat rising up your neck.

"And now I'm walking with my soulmate to change OUR hair," he grinned. Glancing at you from his periphery, you could tell how your happiness egged him on. "Did you catch that, Y/N? We're going together to change our hair."

"I caught it, Hoshi," you laughed.

"And we get to do this forever," he said quietly, chancing a look your way. "Isn't that the coolest?"

"I honestly could not think of anything cooler."

#kwon soonyoung #kwon soon young #hoshi #seventeen #svt #seventeen hoshi #svt hoshi #hoshi scenarios #hoshi soulmate au #hoshi x reader #hoshi fluff #hoshi fanfic #seventeen scenarios #seventeen fic #seventeen x reader #svt fanfic #svt x reader #svt hoshi fanfic #svt hoshi soulmate

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tojixz · 2 years

Text

Masterlist

Pairing: Jake Sully x Fem!Reader

Notes: I am definitely horrible at English, forgive me for any mistakes or if I seem too formal.

Anyway, this is not only my first post, but my first fanfic!

So, yeah, it might suck… BUT I really wanted to try something, especially of my favorite movie since its first release 💞

Well, enjoy! And again, sorry if it's bad

Summary: The reader is in Neytiri's shoes (that hurts me) and is currently pregnant with Tuk, and with pregnancy comes its stages. Just Jake and his family looking out for Mommy!

Warnings: Vomiting, pregnancy problems, fluffy!! I don't know how to mark.

Word Count: 1,6k

Tìyawn (n) - Love 'Itan (n) - Son

Part two | Part three

"Dad."

"Daddy, wake up!"

With a muffled sigh, Jake reluctantly opens his eyes. His eyes burn from the lack of hours of sleep and his fatigue. He waits for his eyes to adjust their focus on a little blue face just above him.

"What happened?", Jake props himself up on his elbow as he looks around alarmed trying to find any sign of danger.

"It's Mom, she rushed out of our tent. She doesn't look well at all, and well, we didn't know what to do", Neteyam said with a worried look on his face, watching his father sit up and reason through the situation. It was still early in the morning and he really hadn't been able to sleep properly the last few days because of his responsibilities as Olo'eyktan and, well, as a father of three children.

Lo'ak and Kiri were also awake, equally worried waiting for some response coming from their father.

"Okay, fine. Thanks for letting me know. Where is she now?", Jake asked looking at his children as he stood up.

"Outside by the trees."

"Okay, go back to sleep, I will take care of your mother", Jake's voice contained concern, but he did his best to mask it and not worry his children further.

Kiri looked at her father in disbelief, stepping in front of him and stopping his passage, "Let's not go to sleep knowing something is wrong with Mom! Daddy, I want to help."

"It's okay babygirl, I'll take care of it. Then go back to bed now, I don't want to see anyone sleepy when they wake up!"

"But Dad-"

"That's all", Jake narrowed his eyes at the three of them and nodded his head towards the bed, Then he turned and hurried away to come to you.

You definitely weren't feeling well. You were experiencing frequent vomiting and dizziness, and you also felt weaker and more tired. Despite this, you were used to it from your other times of pregnancy.

Anyway, today was not an abnormal day. You woke up sweating along with a sour feeling in your throat. You immediately ran to the middle of the trees to get whatever was in your stomach out, taking as much care as possible not to wake any of your children and even your husband who deserved to rest, even more so with the stress he had been under in the last weeks because of problems in the clan.

The early morning air relieved the intense heat you felt throughout your body. You breathed for a few seconds and then finally got rid of the horrible feeling that persisted in settling in your throat.

As you recovered from the episode, you paid no attention to the cautious footsteps behind you and jumped when you felt large hands on your neck caressing them. Your ear crunched against your skull as your head turned full back to detect the intruder.

"Hey, hey, calm down, it's me, Jake", he said stopping in front of you and showing that he wasn't some kind of predator or anything.

"Ah, damn it Jake! Don't sneak up on people like that!", you hissed at him as you slapped his arm.

"Okay, I'm sorry, I'm sorry", Jake put his hands on your head caressing you as he said, "So, is everything okay? Why didn't you wake me up to help you?"

You looked away from Jake's face ashamed of the state you were in. There was no reason to be embarrassed, this was common and it's not like this was your first time, you knew that. But you still felt uncomfortable waking Jake who was sleeping so peacefully, "It's just…. I could handle it on my own, there was no reason to bother you."

Jake sighed, turning you towards him as he placed his hands on your neck lightly brushing your cheeks, "Honey, no matter what the situation, you will never be a bother to me. Even more so when it involves you and my baby", Jake concluded by placing a kiss on your nose and pressing your foreheads together.

Her heart filled with love. You don't know how much good you did in life to have a family as beautiful as yours. Jake and your children were the greatest blessing the Great Mother could give you.

You smiled, resting your hands on Jake's arm. You just enjoyed that moment with him for a few seconds, and then said, "I love you, Ma'Jake."

Jake wrapped his arms around you in a tight embrace, savoring the warmth and presence of his mate, the one who gave him the most beautiful family in existence, one he could never have imagined having. The one who blessed her mornings and made her heart melt when she heard her groggy voice when she woke up. "I love you too, tiyawn. But you really need to call me when you're not feeling well."

You let out a small laugh at your husband's concern and just murmured, "Okay, I count on your protection."

You both stood there for a few minutes, just feeling each other's presence and exchanging caresses while listening to the various noises coming from the forest.

"We should head back now, I'm better", you said pulling away from Jake, taking his hand and starting to pull him back to their shared tent.

"Wait, wait", Jake stopped his steps, approaching you again as he placed one of his hands on your stomach, lightly rubbing the small bulge that stood out on your belly, "Is the baby okay?"

You looked at Jake in surprise at the sudden question. Placing your hand over Jake's hand, you let out a minimally loud laugh, "He's fine Jake Sully. The baby is healthy. Now come on", you took his hand and walked back to the tent once more. "We have other babies to take care of."

Jake let out a playful snort as he followed his majestic companion back home.

As soon as you entered the hut, you were able to hear murmurs coming from the heap of little bodies in the hammock. You assumed that your little ones were just having dreams, but then your thoughts were interrupted by Jake's scolding voice.

"What did I say about going back to sleep?", Jake crossed his arms over his chest, waiting for a response from the mountain of children in the hammock in their terrible pretense at being asleep.

"We are sleeping", Lo'ak lifted his head to answer his father, quickly pulling his eye away from Jake to look at you, who stood beside him.

Jake pinched the middle of his nose in annoyance letting out a sigh in the process, "Silly child, sleeping people don't talk!"

"It's Lo'ak, you skxawng!!", Kiri slapped his brother on the head who promptly let out a 'Hey!' for the aggression. Neteyam completely ignored the idiot fights of his brothers and ran into her arms.

"Mom! Are you okay? What happened?"

You stooped down to little Neteyam's level and planted your hands on his cheeks, cracking a wide smile at the sight of your son, "I'm fine, 'itan. How long have you been awake?"

Lo'ak and Kiri soon joined in the hug, snuggling into his neck in the process. Her heart filled with affection for her children, becoming almost unbearable. Jake was standing off to the side watching everything, almost envying his companion's attention to his children.

"I heard you get up and leave, I was afraid of what might have happened, so I called Daddy", Lo'ak sniffled softly, squeezing you even tighter.

You smiled as you collectively hugged your children, stroking their heads and soothing them. "Oh my baby, I'm fine, see? It was just… a mishap."

"Yes, so we need to let your mother sleep to regain her energy", Jake intruded into the conversation pulling you out from among the children and carrying you to bed.

You looked at him with an unreadable face, allowing yourself to be snuggled into Jake's chest as strong arms encircled your waist.

"Jake!", you tried to pull away, but as expected, was unsuccessful; so your only option was to lie down in defeat feeling a hand from Jake snake into your stomach and lightly caress the bulge.

"Neteyam, Lo'ak, Kiri, come to sleep. You must be tired after Mommy disturbed your sleep", you held out your arm for the children to snuggle in your protection.

There wasn't even time to think about the proposition, the children soon went into their parents' arms, getting as close as possible to each other.

Jake protected his belly from the children's jerky movements as he alarmed his children, "Hey, watch your mother's belly!"

"Ma'Jake, it's okay, they're just babies", you said stroking your companion's arm with a wide smile opening on your lips. Jake sighed defeatedly, nuzzling his head into the curve of your neck and inhaling your scent. He was truly lucky for the woman he had.

Her heart overflowed with affection. It was an unimaginable love that you felt for your family. A family you built with the one you love, a partner you trust. You couldn't have asked anything more from Eywa, not after she blessed you with the most sacred family in your existence.

Your eyes filled lightly with tears; pure tears of care and love, for your children, for your Jake, for your life.

"Good night, my little ones", you said in a whisper, realizing that the children were no longer able to keep their eyes open. They even looked as if they were waiting for a confirmation of your love for them.

Jake let out an anasalated laugh, also closing his eyes as fatigue consumed him and sleep called him into the dream world again. As a last prayer, Jake said in an almost inaudible whisper, only for nearby hearts to hear:

"I love you all. You are my greatest fortress."

I'm sorry if it seemed rushed at the end, I was anxious to finish and may have gone too fast 😭

I hope it was a good read! I kind of liked it for my first story; but I hope to improve in the future.

｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡🍓｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡🍒

#avatar #jake sully #jake sully x reader #avatar jake sully x reader #avatar x reader #avatar the way of water #neteyam sully #loak sully #kiri sully #atwow #atwow fluff #atwow x reader #avatar 2009 #avatar 2022 #avatar 1 #avatar 2 #avatar jake sully #avatar twow

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