#and Sonic didn’t even reassure him or told the group off because he FINALLY got some progress

[kibybun]

Hi. Can I ask you to write about Aizawa or Hawks and their darling, who constantly joked about death and eventually she committed suicide, please? I love your writing💞 You are so awesome and talented and cool. Thank you so much for your work💕

Oh my gosh, thank you so much! I hope you like it!💞💞

Platonic Yandere Hawks x suicide joking reader

Tw: Yandere, suicide, self harm, angst

Enjoy!

💛Hawks first met you at the sports festival, showing off your quirk and demonstrating power. You caught his attention rather quickly.

💛Not only were you adorable but intriguing as well. You wore long sleeves, even though you looked uncomfortable in them, and you seemed oddly quiet compared to everyone else, shying away when they come up to talk to you.

💛Another thing that stood out to him was when you were doing the calvary battle. No one came to ask you to join their team, but you didn't go out and ask to join either. You just stood there until a purple hair guy came up to you, most likely getting you to join his group.

💛Though, you seemed to change. Your fighting style and the way you use your quirk changed.

💛It bothered Hawks the whole calvary battle but he was put at ease when some kid with a tail backed out due to the other guy brainwashing him.

💛You end up backing out too, much to Hawk's dismay.

💛Even though you weren't fighting anymore he still keeps his attention on you, not seeing your other classmates or students.

💛He watched you zone out and silently cheer for your classmates, finding it adorable as you watch in awe at some of the battles.

💛The sports festival ends and he follows you home, only to make surd your okay. Once he got home he quickly put in a request for you to come intern with him before going to bed.

💛When you went back to school you were excited to see if anyone wanted you to intern with them, knowing you wouldn't get as many requests like Todoroki or Deku.

💛... two. Only two requests.

💛It hurt to look at the board and see that you one of the most unwanted students in class 1-A. You thought you did really well and maybe impressed more than two people.

💛You get your list of hero agencies and sink deeper into your self pitty when you realize that one of the agencies werebt even specifically asking for you. All the students got requested by them.

💛That leaves Hawk's agency.

💛You didn't know much about him and his work so this was going to be awkward.

💛When the day came to board the subway and head off to your internship, no one wished you goodbye. All the groups and clicks were together, walking each other to their respective trains while you again, stood alone. You ere used to it though.

💛You board the train and zone out, nearly missing your stop.

💛Right as you get off the train your vision is filled with red feathers. Low and behold the pro hero who requested you.

💛His charisma hits you as you instantly feel welcome. He makes witty remarks about the train being too slow as he begins walking with you in tow.

💛Along the way you ask him why he wanted you to intern with him. He smirks and responds with a "Why wouldn't I?" That didn't answer your question.

💛He walks you to his agency and introduces you to all his other interns. After that he shoves you towards the bathroom, telling you to change into your hero costume.

💛He sure didn't waste time as the two of you begin patrolling the city. It seemed very rushed and eager but you prefered it over having to sit in class and do quizzes.

💛During patrol Hawks starts questioning you about school and life almkst like an uncle or brother would. It was very odd to you, considering you never get asked questions about yourself.

💛You felt so pitiful not being able to tell him your birthday, you had forgotten it, but somehow he was so understanding and kind about it.

💛It wasn't long before all of his fans flocked to the two of you, shouting questions and begging for autographs. You didn't like how all the people were surrounding you and Hawks could tell.

💛He uses his wing to shield you and hastily shoos the crowd off. After that he asks if you're okay and checks to make sure you didn't get hurt.

💛His intentions weren't to sleep with you, no. They were pure. He almost saw himself in you, alone and blocked off from the world. He just wanted to protect you and make sure you knew you weren't alone.

💛It was working too.

💛In the short week you were with him you had laughed the hardest you had in awhile and smiled more. You even considered him your bestfriend.

💛The one downside of your friendship was he couldn't see your cries for help.

💛While one roofs or flying with him you'd make jokes about how easy it would be to fall and die or how fun it'd feel to free fall.

💛He'd only laugh these off, thinking it was some kind of dark humor, because if something was wrong he'd trust you to tell him.

💛When the internship was over you had to hold back tears as he hugged you goodbye. Of course he gave you his number to keep in touch but it wouldn't be the same as sneaking away from work and eating fried chicken.

💛The second the train left you felt how alone you were. You didnt want to text him right away because that would feel too needy. Should you even text him? Was he doing it just to be nice or did he actually care?

💛You leave those thoughts behind as your phone buzzes. It was a text from Hawks. "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

💛Your mood brightens as the two of you continue sending dumb chicken jokes, memes, and puns, with the occasional "dark humored" joke from you.

💛You make it home and your texting slowed, mainly due to Hawks having to work. You didn't know he was actually flying outside your house, making sure you were okay before flying off to buy you a dumb looking teddy bear.

💛Slowly, your mood begins to brighten with the constant reassurance of Hawks being there. He knew the right things to say at all times. Self conscious about your outfit? Incomes a barrage of compliments and confidence boosters. Nervous about a test or presentation? Boom, paragraphs about how amazing you are and how you can do it.

💛It almost made the emptiness inside go away.

💛Problems don't just go away, and it really shows.

💛Whenever you couldn't text or call Hawks your loniness sinks in. You had no other friends besides him. Your parents weren't the beat either with their comments about what you're doing or what you're wearing.

💛It only reminded you of all the reasons for the scars on your arms.

💛But before you could act on those reasons he was there. It was always magicly when you were crying in bed or fumbling with a sharp object.

💛Over time Hawks picked up on your thoughts and feelings, causing him to watch over you every second he could. He loved you so much, he couldn't lose you.

💛The amount of cute gifts he gets you griw over time. More stuffed animals, more snacks, more little trinkets. Anything to make you happy.

💛And again, it worked. The nights you spent crying or staring numbly at the ceiling slowly decreased. You also threw away the razors you had hidden, determined to stay clean.

💛When the work studies came you were the happiest you've ever been. You got to be with Hawks again.

💛Upon seeing him you were greeted with the best hug you've ever gotten along with fried chicken for lunch.

💛But something was off this time. He seemed a little more paranoid walking around the city with you, more eager to be inside at night, and disappearing at night.

💛It worried you, making you overthink the hole situation tenfold.

💛What if he was trying to avoid you? Where you being that annoying? Maybe he was tired of you. You should just leave him alone.

💛He hugs you goodbye as you leave, still conflicted.

💛Sadly your thoughts only grow stronger as time goes on. His texts become shorter and less frequent, making you think he was tired of you. His constant gifts had stopped as well

💛Hawks couldn't control his lack of contact with you. He wanted to spam you with memes at two am like he normally did but he was given a mission that couldn't be compromised, even at the expense of your friendship.

💛You fall back into your dark place without him. You were reminded of how forgettable you were to everyone, how you had no friends beside him, how your parents were disappointed in you.

💛What's the point in living in pain?

💛You start cutting again, just wanting to feel something again. You stop sleeping and eating, not feeling the need for it anymore. You completely passed out during training due to this.

💛One weekend you ride a train away from your town and into the one where Hawk's agency was. You were looking for him, a sign, anything, to tell you to stop.

💛The streets were empty and he was no where in sight.

💛You fight yourself at the top of a business building, hands trembling as you sent a final text to your only friend. You told him how much he ment to you, how grateful you were to him, how sorry you were for being annoying and taking up so much of his time, how this was goodbye.

💛You got to feel the wind rush past you. You were right about it being fun to free fall.

💛Hawks was talking to Dabi when his phone buzzed. Thinking it was the commission he checked it.

💛Dabi watched as Hawk's smug demeanor turned to confused then broken. He watched the pro hero fall to his knees and clutch his phone, nearly cracking it.

💛Dabi didn't even have a chance to ask what was wrong as Hawks flew at super sonic speed away from him and up into the sky.

💛He first scanned the buildings looking for you, wiping the tears from his eyes to try and see better. When he couldn't find you he swoops down low to the streets to see if he could catch you before you hit the ground.

💛He stops when he sees the splatters of your body of the ground.

💛He collapses next to you, sobbing as he looked at your remains.

💛It was his fault. He should've been there so much more. He should've watched you more carefully than he did. He should've killed those fuckers who thought they were better than you.

💛You should've lived.

💛Hawks lays there crying, going over all the things he did wrong and how it should've been him to die.

💛The morning comes and police officers tape off the area, pulling a now broken man away from you. They clean the area and leave.

💛Hawks mindlessly sits in the spot you were in, hoping this was a nightmare.

💛Night falls and Dabi managed to find him. He tells Hawks that he saw the news. It was odd for him to feel sympathy for a hero but here he was.

💛Hawks stands and grabs Dabi's hand, placing it on his face before begging him to set him ablaze. He didn't want to live in a world without you.

💛Dabi backs up, retreating his hand and looking at him stunned. What exactly did you mean to him?

💛Hawks continues to beg and pleas but Dabi continues to refuse. Too bad Hawks would do anything to die at this point.

💛Hawks shouts out his plans to spy on the league, to manipulate and destroy them from the inside. How he would kill them all in secret if he could. How it would be the best feeling ever to watch them die in betrayal.

💛Dabi falls for his trap. Rage was the only thing he could feel as his fire engulfed Hawks, semding him to the grave in a firey blaze.

💛He ran from the scene, leaving another body in the same spot.

kiby~💚

[oswildin]

Falling Too Fast ~ Dhawan!Master x F!Reader (PART 4)

~ I’ve got a final part planned... So keep an eye out, thinking of doing a ‘decide your destiny’ type ending? ~

MASTERlist: https://oswildin.tumblr.com/post/190255360110

Summary: The Master and (Y/N) parted ways once more. (Y/N) couldn’t cope anymore and it was started to show to the fam...

Warnings: Possible teasing... will they... won’t they...

The fam knew something was wrong with (Y/N). She’d been quiet, reserved... she didn’t really input in their adventures anymore. Yaz remembered the tearful call (Y/N) had made not so long before. (Y/N) played it off, as usual, denying the fact she’d been crying. All the fam noticed. They all had their suspicions... the most obvious being that her and her boyfriend had split.

None of them knew how to approach the subject. The Doctor becoming all awkward and confused, Ryan saying the wrong thing, Graham trying to cheer her up, whilst Yaz just didn’t want to make her more upset.

“Hey, (Y/N), you wanna choose the next place we go?” The Doctor called over her shoulder as she peered up from the console. The others all looked encouragingly towards the girl as she sat on the steps, looking at them. She bit her lip, shrugging.

“I guess.” She forced a smile, getting up from her seated position. “Hmmm... how about we go to your home?” She inquired, raising a brow at the Doctor. She had read the files The Master had given her. She knew the Doctor’s history with her home. She was hoping perhaps the Doctor would open up to them, tell them more, tell them the truth.

The Doctor’s face fell as she instantly turned cold.

“Not today.” She said shortly. “What about a trip to the future, huh?” She forced a smile, pulling some levers as (Y/N) glanced at the others as they noticed the uncomfortable tension in the room.

“Don’t you think we deserve to know about your past?” She questioned, challenging her friend as the Doctor tried to ignore her. But when she saw the others also looking for answers.

“Why?” The Doctor furrowed her brows, turning to face the girl. “You know who I am. Right here, right now is all that matters.” She paused. “Somethings are best left in the past.”

Yaz looked over at (Y/N) as they explored the planet, the Doctor leading as Ryan and Graham fell behind.

“You ok?” Yaz asked, throwing a concerned glance at her friend. “It’s just... you’ve been acting differently lately. It’s like you don’t enjoy this anymore.” (Y/N) sighed, shrugging.

“Maybe I don’t.” She snapped, as Yaz sent her a confused stare. “Sorry.” She sighed. “I didn’t meant to snap.”

“It’s alright.” Yaz gave her a small reassuring smile. “I know you probably don’t wanna talk about... you know. But you know we are here for you.” She said sincerely, as (Y/N) gave her a small smile in return.

“I know...” She said softly. “It’s just... I miss him, y’know.” She knew Yaz didn’t know it was the Master, of course, but she could at least somewhat talk about it. “But I had a choice... he gave me a choice...”

“Did he know? About the Doctor?” Yaz inquired, raising a brow. (Y/N) looked down.

“Yeah.” She admitted.

“Come on gang!” The Doctor shouted from ahead, breaking up their conversation, as they caught up with the Timelord.

“Something is really really wrong.”

The Doctor stated as they stood in the middle of the alien market. Her eyes were wide, analysing as she looked around.

“What is it Doc?” Graham questioned, as they all intensely watched the woman. She pulled out her sonic, scanning as it began to beep.

“Oh no.” She muttered to herself.

“Okay, you’re really not settling our nerves here, Doc.” Graham continued to talk as she shh’d him. “She just shushed me!” He turned to Ryan as he shrugged. (Y/N) looked around as she began to notice, all the aliens were staring at them. They weren’t moving, just watching.

“Doctor-“ (Y/N) called, but was also shh’d by the woman. “No Doctor- you really need to listen!” She exclaimed, as the traveller turned to face her companion. “Look.” (Y/N) spoke quietly, frozen in her spot as the Timelord peered around them, seeing what her friend was seeing.

“Oh.” The Doctor said, her hearts beginning to race.

“What?!” Graham cried, causing the Doctor to once again, shh him.

“Okay, so... It appears as though this planet isn’t what it appears.” The Doctor explained. “It’s a trap.” She told them, as (Y/N) felt her heart begin to race.

“A trap?” Yaz questioned, as they all stayed extremely still.

“Yes.” The Doctor looked her dead in the eyes. “They are life forms, that take over planets, mask themselves as the locals, then lure people in...”

“Why would they do that?” Ryan asked, his voice low.

“Why do you think?” The Doctor replied raising a brow. “Lunch.” Everyone’s eyes went wide at her words. She pressed a button on her sonic, as she aimed it at the aliens. Their once friendly, harmless looking facade faded away, revealing large grey beings with big teeth and large claws. (Y/N) let out a breath as she instinctively moved closer to the group. “No! Don’t move!” The Doctor exclaimed, as one of the creatures reached out, grabbing (Y/N) by her jacket. She didn’t yell, her body freezing as she held her breath. “Nobody move.” She told them all. “They rely on movement to find their food. They’re blind, and deaf, they’ve evolved to the point where they just need to sense movement. Albeit, big movements, like us walking or running...”

“That’s evolving?” Graham questioned, as the Doctor sent him a glance.

“For their species, yeah.”

“So what are we gonna do?” Ryan asked, peering over at his friend that was still in the grip of the alien.

“(Y/N) don’t move an inch, try to lessen your breath intake.” The Doctor told her quietly but sternly. “Don’t worry, I’ll get you all out of this.” However, the creature that had been holding (Y/N) yelled in pain, as it released the girl, who was shaking slightly from fear as she quickly took a deep breath, falling to the ground. The creatures moved towards the motion, as everyone tried to stay still.

(Y/N) felt a pair of hands on her side, as she was being lifted up. She didn’t fight, afraid it was another danger as she looked to see it was in fact the opposite.

“Surprised to see me?”

(Y/N)‘s eyes went wide as she saw who it was.

“Master?” The Doctor furrowed her brows, before noticing the creatures moving towards them faster. “Okay! New plan, run!” The Doctor exclaimed as they all began to run in the opposite direction to the aliens. The Master instinctively grabbed (Y/N)‘s hand as he pulled her along, shooting any aliens that got to close. The Doctor didn’t have time to argue as they arrived at an abandoned building, all rushing in out of sight.

Everyone caught their breaths as the Doctor stared over at the fellow Timelord, marching up to him as he stood in front of (Y/N).

“What are you doing here?” The Doctor questioned, her voice low as she glared at the man.

“Good to see you too.” He replied. “You’re welcome by the way.”

“Why would I thank you?!” The Doctor exclaimed. “You put us all in danger!”

“And how were you going to get out of that one? Hm?” He raised a brow. “No TARDIS nearby, no weapons...” He clicked his tongue. “(Y/N) would’ve been dead in seconds if I hadn’t have come along!” (Y/N) looked up at the man, her heart racing as the others all looked at him, surprised expressions on their faces.

“Why would you care?” The Doctor narrowed her eyes. “Last time I checked, you were trying to kill us all.” The Master rolled his eyes at the woman as he pushed past her.

“I can get you to your TARDIS.” He announced. “I can get you off this planet safely.”

“Why would we trust you?” Ryan asked, his brows furrowed.

“You shouldn’t.” The Master told him. “But if you want to live, then I suggest you try.” There were roars from the distance, as he titled his head. “Sounds like companies arriving. Time to make a choice. Trust me or don’t.” (Y/N) looked over at him as he sent a glance her way. She sighed, walking over to him.

“What have you got up your sleeve?” She asked. “Teleport?” He smirked, glad to see she still knew him.

“How do we know this isn’t a trap?” The Doctor asked with gritted teeth.

“Because, Doctor, would I really be this blatantly obvious about it?” He gestured with his hands. “Really? I’m hurt you’d even think of me so lowly.” The roars grew louder.

“We need to go now. You can fight later.” (Y/N) told them, as she waved her friends over. They hesitantly followed as they stood beside her. “Doctor, trust me, if you can’t trust him... then trust me.” She held out her hand to her friend, as the Master pursed his lips. The Doctor took her companions hand, as she took the Masters. All of them joined hands as the Master pressed a button on a device on his wrist.

They reappeared back where they started, outside of the city, in front of the TARDIS. Everyone took a relieved breath as they realised they were alive.

“How did you get out of the middle dimension?” The Doctor questioned, staring at the man with caution. He shrugged.

“Let’s just say, you can’t trap me.” He told her shortly as he began to walk away.

“Wait! Where are you going?” (Y/N) asked, stepping after him.

“Back to my TARDIS.” He told her. “I’ve done my job. Now it’s time to go.”

“And what jobs that then?” The Doctor inquired, narrowing her eyes. The Master tightened his jaw as he stared at (Y/N). She felt her hearts race as he looked at her.

“Making sure I was ok.” She spoke softly. She shook her head slightly. “You’ve been watching me...” She stated, as he stayed silent.

“Why would he do that?” The Doctor asked, confused by the situation as Yaz began to understand.

“I was travelling with him.” (Y/N) admitted, turning to her friend. “I’m sorry.” She sighed. “I couldn’t turn my back on him.”

“What?” Graham exclaimed, looking surprised. “You travelled with him?!”

“Yes.” She nodded. “I was travelling with both of you.” She paused. “Without telling the other. But he found out... Gave me a choice.” She shook her head. “But I couldn’t... I couldn’t chose!” She cried, laughing lightly. “Look at you both.” She looked between the two Timelords. “Why does it have to come to this?” The Master stared at the Doctor as she did him. (Y/N) decided to take the lead as she turned to the Master.

“Come with us.”

The Master furrowed his brows. The Doctor looked confused, shocked even.

“Come on, two Timelords is better than one.” She smiled slightly. “Also, he did save us today.” She walked to the Doctor speaking quieter. “He’s got good in him... He just needs encouragement... and people there to help him.” The Doctor glanced over at the Master as he still stood quietly.

“Fine.” The Doctor shrugged. “Maybe we can help each other.” She admitted. “Now that Gallifreys gone... We’re all that’s left.”

“Just like the good old days.” The Master commented, as the Doctor nodded slightly.

“Just come with us, for a bit. You don’t have to stay.” (Y/N) turned to the Master, almost begging. “Please.” He thought for a moment, biting his inner cheek.

“Fine. But you don’t control me Doctor.” He said darkly. “I make my own decisions. If I want to kill somebody, I will.” He almost growled, as (Y/N) swallowed the lump in her throat. “But only if they really annoy me.” He sent a warning glance at her other companions as (Y/N) rolled her eyes at his words.

“Uh, do we not get a say in this?” Graham raised his hand, as the Master glared at him.

“I can feel the urge growing...” He said quietly to himself as (Y/N) shook her head, giving him a stern glare as he rolled his eyes.

“Head inside, give us two minutes.” (Y/N) told them as they all followed her order, giving her and the Master space.

“Couldn’t stay away then?” She teased, nudging him slightly as he stared down at her.

“You could say that.” He admitted. “Personally I just think I got so used to your annoying personality, that I felt almost bored without it.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” She smiled as he sent her a small one in return.

“Do you feel safe?” The Master asked. “With the Doctor?” (Y/N) furrowed her brows at his question, as she thought for a moment.

“I don’t feel safe anywhere.” She shrugged. “With or without the Doctor... the universe isn’t always kind.” She told him. “I could die anywhere, at any time from any thing... travelling with the Doctor, or you for that matter, just means that there is another possibility for something to happen...”

“Humans...” He shook his head. “You’re so blissfully unafraid of death even though your mortality is tested every day.”

“Yeah well, get used to it.” She smirked. “You’re travelling with four humans now.” He grimaced at her words.

“Give me strength.” He replied as she led the way to the Doctor’s. “Bear with me, I just need to send my TARDIS somewhere safe. Don’t want it falling into the wrong hands.” He sent her one last glance before returning to his ship, as she entered the Doctor’s.

The Master stood by the door, sighing to himself as he walked up towards the console. Was he really prepared to travel with the Doctor? All for her?

He gripped the console as he leant on it. He had always been a loner, he wanted to keep it that way. It was best. Wasn’t it?

(Y/N) wore a smile for the first time in a while as she reentered the TARDIS. The others all looked at her as she was beaming.

“So... this secret boyfriend?” Ryan raised a brow.

“It was a cover.” She told them. “Don’t worry. I’m not frolicking with the enemy. We just travelled together that’s all.” She shrugged, casually. Graham sighed in relief.

“Oh good. Cause I wouldn’t have known how to approach that subject.” He said as the others all laughed. The Doctor gave (Y/N) a hard stare as she approached her.

“Are you sure about this?” The Doctor questioned.

“Yeah! Why wouldn’t I be?” She asked in return, her brows furrowing.

“Don’t fall for him.” The Doctor told her sadly. “It’s never going to be easy.” (Y/N) smile faltered as she listened to the Doctors words. The Doctor sighed to herself, realising... “it’s too late, isn’t it?” (Y/N) stayed quiet, looking over at the door.

“What’s taking him so long?” She shook her head. She ran towards the door, stepping out. “Oi! What’s taking you so-“ She stopped, as she realised his TARDIS was no longer there... and neither was he. She felt her heart break once more as she looked down. She should’ve known...

She sadly walked back into the TARDIS as everyone noticed her change in demeanour.

“Where is he?” Yaz asked, hands in pockets as she looked confused. (Y/N) gave her a small smile.

“He’s gone.” She told them sadly, as Yaz sighed, her features softening.

“I’m sorry.” The Doctor told her sincerely, as she forced a smile.

“It’s fine.” She nodded. “I know I’ll see him again. He’s just not ready yet.” She shrugged, as the others sent her small smiles.

“Right! So... where to next?”

~

Taglist: @blamerogertaylor @dannighost @imagine-whatever @yourlocalspacebisexual @the-sweet-space-bi @wonders-of-the-multiverse @a--1--1--3 @asupersonicwoman @impalasquiptyseven

[feverwritingandtextposts]

12pm, Saturday, Shinjuku Station

This was also posted on ao3 here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21695521 

"Tomorrow!" Rengoku all but shouts by way of greeting. You turn to him, trying to look less shocked than you felt. Around you, the milling students show signs at having jolted at the history teacher's boisterous voice.  

The late afternoon light streaming in through the corridor window bathes Rengoku in a deep gold that only strives to make him look even larger than life. The man himself was wearing his signature manic grin, sonic eyes focused on you.

He looked oddly out of place in the quiet school corridor, too vibrant for the tired air of students dragging their feet home from supplementary classes.

Before you are given the chance to answer, he continues. "Meet me at Shinjuku station! At 12pm! See you there!" Apparently having said his piece, he strides off past you, neither waiting for your response, nor looking back even once.

You watch him power walk away, stopping only to greet the students who call out to him as he goes.

What.

After standing there for long enough for your shocked brain to catch up with the rest of your limbs, you headed down the hallway after Rengoku. Upon reaching the staff room, you learn from a suspiciously animated Uzui that the man had already gone home. Resigning yourself to what seemed to be the inevitable push of Rengoku-induced fate, you gathered up your own things and headed home.

Perhaps this was normal Rengoku behaviour. You had absolutely no yard stick to compare him to, considering you have never met anyone like him before. For a moment, you considered not going.  

But then again, you didn't have anything to do tomorrow in any case.

And then again, you didn't have his number so it not like you could have called him to cancel.

Tomorrow brought with it the blinding sun of noontime, and Rengoku Kyoujurou's equally blinding grin, easily recognisable even in the crowded rush of Shinjuku station commuters. Wrapped up in a large, conspicuous red coat,  the starched collar of a dress shirt peaks through the neckline. Spotting you immediately as you emerge through the gantry, he strides towards you on glossy oxfords. You feel, all at once, significantly under dressed.

"You look great!" Rengoku booms at you once he considered you significantly within earshot. You were in jeans and sneakers, but you appreciated the polite sentiment anyway.

It was only when you were leaving the house an hour ago that you realised that you had no idea what Rengoku even needed you on a weekend for. You had no idea what to wear, so you had just been hoping it was perhaps a relaxed faculty lunch or an extra tutoring session for any stray failing students, and decided that what you had on would do. Now though, you weren't so sure.

You attempted to glance past him, but Rengoku's wide shoulders and even wider smile seemed to block everyone else from sight.

"You look nice as well," you say, gesturing to his prim ensemble. Rengoku smiles, if possible, even wider. "Thank you! Lets be off!" Turning sharply on his heel, he walks off into the crowd, leaving you to hurry after him, just as before, not once turning back at you.

"Where are the rest?" you ask, finally managing to elbow your way through the crowd to his side as he paused at a stoplight.

Rengoku turns to look down at you, tilting his head unlike a puppy. If, puppies could look so strangely intimidating.

"What rest? It's just us today!"

You blink at him as he begins to walk again, long legs carrying him farther and farther from you as you continued to hurry along. As you got closer, you realised he was talking, and had likely been talking for a while now.

"-And so I think it will be best if we hurry, as then we will be able to see all the fish, AND the penguin show!"

Fish? Penguin show? Hesitantly you asked again, "Rengoku-san... Where are we going?"

"The aquarium! Of course!"

Of course.

Rengoku Kyoujirou tells no lies, and certainly not enough base info, because you soon find yourself within the comforting dim lights of the aquarium's lobby, staring at the whale diorama hanging from the ceiling.

Why on earth did he drag you to the aquarium out of all places? You taught literature for heaven's sakes. Was he going to practice a lecture on the history of Japan's rising sea levels on you?

You heard that the school was planning a learning journey for the students soon, perhaps this was just the recce trip. You didn't find yourself much a fan of fish of any size or shape, thinking the expanse of water a bit overwhelming, and the traumatic memory of watching Jaws when you were only 7 leaving you with mild apprehension for live sea life in any proximity to you.

You said nothing of this to Rengoku, who seemed enthralled at the idea of staring at deep sea eels through twenty meter thick walls of glass, informing you (against your will) about nearly each and every specimen of creature housed in the aquarium. He was so pumped, he waived away your concern of paying him back for your ticket, with a laugh so booming you were sure he startled away a few fish (and some concerned parents).

At exactly 1:50pm, Rengoku straightened from where he had crouched down over the starfish tank, yelling mostly in the direction of the water about the creature's unique ability to regrow limbs "just like a demon!" (you never heard of mythical demons growing back limbs but thought it better than to ask).

"Let's go! The penguin show will start soon!"  

The two of you managed to secure a good spot before the crowd started streaming in, thanks to Rengoku's timely actions. The penguins turned out to be absolutely adorable, easily bumping them up to the most enjoyable part of your trip.

Rengoku was unexpectedly quiet as you rambled on, happily recounting to him your favourite parts of the show, as you two followed the crowd out, with just enough timely grunts of approval to let you know he was listening.  

As your excitement over the penguins died down, the two of you lapsed into a contemplative silence. You, wondering if its feasible to teach your pet crow similar tricks to the penguins, and him, wondering about whatever it is Rengoku thinks about.

Probably more fish facts.

The silence is broken far too quickly, with him declaring that the two of you should go get lunch. Agreeing readily enough, Rengoku leads you straight out of the aquarium, to your surprise. You had expected him to want to grab something quick at the aquarium's cafe.

Instead, he leads you to a quaint looking restaurant, still bustling with activity despite the late hour for lunch. The restaurant seemed to be populated with couples and groups of fashionable teenage girls, who fit in nicely with the flowery, delicate decor.

Rengoku sits ramrod straight in his ornate chair, ostentatious with his wild hair, red coat (still fully buttoned up), and shiny shoes, yet strangely he did not seem at odds with the gentle atmosphere of the restaurant.

"Do you come here often?" you ask, curious after listening to him recite a practiced order to the waiter.

"No! This is my first time here!" he beams at you.

"You seem familiar with the menu."

"I researched it! I heard this restaurant was popular with young women! I thought you might like it!"

You blink at him, surprised. You were touched at the gesture, and told him as much.

To your continued surprise, Rengoku does not throw you his signature shouted 'thank you!', but instead by way of response, gives you a pleased, serene, closed eye smile, that looked absolutely radiant on his handsome face. Compared to all his wild smiles before, this tugs at your heartstrings in a way that fills your cheeks with an embarrassing blush.

That moment of peace can only last so long. As the waiter returned with your individual meals, so did Rengoku's overwhelming enthusiasm.

"Delicious!" He exclaims, at full volume, completely ignorant of the scandalised stares the other patrons send him.

You hid your amused smile behind your spoon as you ate, trying to ignore the stares as well as he did. The food really was delicious.

Rengoku once again, waves away your attempts to pay, with the compromise that you can pay for the movie later.

Wait. Movie?

And so you went, to an afternoon screening of a newly released horror movie that Rengoku apparently, had booked seats for before. Was he planning to bring the students to the movie as part of the learning journey? You weren't even sure the kids were old enough to see it. Perhaps he's just a horror movie fanatic and wanted someone to watch the show with.

Not wanting to seem like a spoilsport but also not particularly enjoying movies like these, you went along with it quietly, paying for the tickets and buying a large bucket of popcorn for the both of you to share.

You both spend the movie sandwiched on either side between people in the packed theater. Rengoku watched the movie with studious intensity, while you stared at his profile, the popcorn, and the screen (between your fingers). Every so often Rengoku would lean in close to ask you if you were scared, and if you were doing okay, and if you needed him to explain a part of the plot you were studiously ignoring. He was using what he possibly supposes to be a whisper, although it could barely pass for a usual person's speaking volume, and was regularly and aggressively shushed by the people seating close by them.

Worried he wouldn't be able to hear your response from the screams of the actors on screen, you just shook your head or nodded in time to his questions, resorting to patting his arm to reassure him of your comfort, preferring not to reveal to him how scared you were of the movie.

Somehow you had expected to hate the movie more than you actually did. You actually spent most of it amused by Rengoku's undeterred 'whispers' and the subsequent low voiced shushes by the rest of the agitated audience. It certainly shaved off a lot of the possible tension. He also managed to get the plot of the movie completely skewed in the moments he attempted to recount it to you, and it only served to make the situation more amusing.

Rengoku offered to treat you to dessert in return for the movie, seeming to conveniently forget the entire point of you paying for the movie in the first place. At this point, you have gotten used to his steamroller personality and let him drag you to his dessert stall of choice.

Seated at a brightly lit shaved ice cafe, you watch as Rengoku carries over what looked like half the store's entire stock of shaved ice, piled high in a bowl that required both his hands to carry. The myriad of fruits and assorted cookies glittered adorning the dessert wriggled precariously as he sets it down in front of you. You had to lean to your side to even see Rengoku past the towering ice monstrosity.

Handing you a spoon, the man himself grins, manic, turning his gaze to his latest conquest.

"Lets dig in!"

You weren't even sure where all the food went.

Rengoku had just eaten a huge lunch at the restaurant not two hours ago, polished off most of the popcorn you bought (before the commercials even ended), and now was pretty much single handedly finishing off the giant bowl of shaved ice.

You had tapped out long ago, only managing to chew your way through less than a quarter of the thing, barely even making much of a dent in the now overflowing fruits and cookies. Even now, you couldnt rid yourself of the cloying sweet taste of the treats from your mouth.

Rengoku was undeterred by your lack of enthusiasm, shoveling large quantities of ice and fruit into his mouth in between exclamations of its deliciousness. You watched him in a mixture of awe and amusement at his battle with the dessert. You were actually a bit shocked that they sold an item so big at this store.

"Please! Have some more!" Rengoku implores you, speaking around the mixture of melting ice and syrup in his mouth.

You shake your head sheepishly in response. "That's alright, I'm already quite full."

Rengoku pauses his spoon for a second, considering you seriously, and the intensity of his gaze makes you squirm. Before you can say anything to fill the sudden silence, he gives an affirmative "HM!" and continues speed eating before the ice fully melts.

You two pass the rest of the time in silence, save for Rengoku's loud chewing. For you, this is normal. For him, it seems, not so much. You fret silently in your seat, wondering if you've offended him somehow. He did intend to treat you. Perhaps he felt annoyed that you didn't seem to appreciate the dessert?

The silence continued as the two of you walk out of the cafe, broken only by Rengoku telling you that since it's getting rather dark, he would walk you home.  Touched by the gentlemanly gesture and horrified at this new, quiet Rengoku, you give him an uncharacteristically cheerful agreement, and get a sharp nod in return.

You avoid looking at your phone on the train ride back, unwilling to offend him further, even though you could feel his intense gaze trained on you. A few times, he opens his mouth, as if to speak, and you turn to him quickly, as if to hear, but he only takes a deep breath and says nothing, mouth shutting with a clack.

Your anxiety was  at an all time high by the time the both of you reached the quiet street that lead up to your apartment block. You wondered how you were going to work together when you had somehow made even your most amicable mad at you. You also wondered if he managed to fulfill... Whatever it is he had set out to do today. In the end you got too caught up to the flow of it to ask, and he never said anything himself.

You turn to him, swinging your hands nervously. "We're here. Thank you for walking me back."

Rengoku shoots you one of his signature smiles, although it seems a bit strained. "No problem!"

You take a step back, intending to leave, and Rengoku follows with a step towards you. Another step back, he takes another step forward.

".... Well... See ya on Monday I guess? Thanks for today."

That seems to jolt him out of his reverie. "Ah! Yes, thank you! I enjoyed today very much!" he exclaims, at full volume, booming even louder in the quiet night.

You can't help but smile in return, feeling that the day's activities have made you rather taken with his idiosyncrasies. Even if you had no idea what the entire point of the outing was, you realised you had a surprising amount of fun. It was the first time you've been to an aquarium in years, and you certainly would never have watched that movie or eaten that dessert on your own accord. It's refreshing.

Rengoku takes another step towards you, and you're now close enough to see the fog of his breath. If you reach out, you can feel the material of his fancy red coat. He opens his mouth as if to say something, and gapes at you for a moment, before swooping down, and scooping you in a gentle hug.

You barely have time to process the warmth of his body around you before he leans back quickly, holding his arms rigid at his side.

"WELL THEN!" Rengoku shouts, shouting somehow even louder than before. "GOODNIGHT!"

Turning on his heel, he makes as if to stride away, but this time you're ready for it. Your arm shoots out, grabbing a fistful of his coat, and he stops immediately, one foot still hanging in the air.

"What- What was that?" you ask, confusion and shock melding together to irritation.

Rengoku turns, slowly, and when he faces you, you can tell that he's blushing all the way to his hairline, face dyed nearly the same shade as his coat. Immediately, he dips into a low bow, ponytail flopping with the movement.

"I'M VERY SORRY!"

You scratch your cheek awkwardly at the display. "It's okay, I'm not mad I'm just... Confused. Do you hug everyone after spending the day with them?"

Still bent at the waist, staring at the floor, Rengoku shouts into the pavement. "NO! I'M SORRY! I WAS SUPPOSED TO GO IN FOR A KISS BUT I... IM NOT STRONG ENOUGH! FORGIVE ME!"

You open your mouth, and close it, and open it again.

Sorry? Did you hear that right? Kiss? Who? You? Him? Kiss you?

Very distantly you hear yourself ask, "Why were you trying to kiss me?"

Rengoku peeks up at you from his bow. "Uzui-san told me that kissing you was the only appropriate way to end a date."

Uzui? Date?

"He..." You began, before switching tactics, knowing that anything involving advice from Uzui was sure to end up a shit storm. "This is a date?"

Rengoku straightens up slowly from his bow peering at you with his closest possible approximation towards nervousness. "Yes, it is!" At your lack of response he continues, "I have never been on a date before, so I asked Uzui-san for help! He seems very knowledgeable on the subject! He suggested I take you to the aquarium as it is a staple for dates! He told me of the restaurant to bring you to! He also suggested the movie!"

Rengoku paused, as if to gauge your reaction, but at your totally shocked to stone state, he continues on himself.

"I thoroughly researched the timings and sea life so I could show you the best of the aquarium while we were there! I also checked out reviews of the restaurant and their menu to make sure there would be items you would like there! I picked out the dessert because it had all of the fruits and cookies that I know you liked!"

"I... I just wanted you to have a good time," he finishes off, voice going uncharacteristically soft.

Now finished with his tirade he looks at you expectantly, eyes as intense as ever. Completely bombarded by the rush of information, you scramble to scrounge up a response.

"Why didn't you tell me it was a date?"

He does his puppy-esque head tilt. "Uzui-san says you would definitely know, as aquariums are a staple for dates!"

You were going to murder Uzui on Monday.

But then again, suddenly everything made sense. Rengoku's overly detailed itinerary for the day, his exceptional dressing, the restaurant, the walk home. You felt like an idiot for not noticing sooner.

Never in your wildest dreams would you thought Rengoku to have feelings for you. You had expected him to only see you as a fellow colleague, one who had joined the academy at the same time and were at most, buddies for that reason alone. Sure, he always tries to make time to talk to you at work, but you just chalked that up to how he is with everyone. Hell, you never even really thought you were in his league, fully aware of how popular he was with the student body and fellow teachers.

You bury your face in your hands, trying not to groan out loud at your own obliviousness. In front of you Rengoku shifts his weight from one foot to the other, obviously getting antsy with your silence.

"I understand if you don't feel similarly," he begins in a voice too level to belong to himself, "I respect your feelings fully and am sincerly sorry if I have crossed any boundaries. Do not worry at work I-"

"NO!" you yell, cutting him off nearly throwing yourself forward to grab him in your haste.  "I-I'm happy, you told me this!"

Rengoku stares down at you shocked by your loud response, face twitching as if he doesn't know whether to smile or not.

Awkwardly, you step forward, gently wrapping your arms around him, holding them there loosely until you feel him hug you back. You hide your burning cheeks in the folds of his coat, and the two of you stand in that dim street, hugging for what feels like a lifetime.

Finally Rengoku breaks the silence. "So, does this mean the date was a success?"

"Yep," you smile into his coat, your voice coming out muffled by the fabric, but you're pretty sure he heard you anyway.

"Then, can we go on another one again soon?"

You nodded, pulling away from him to face him. He's wearing that heart throbbing serene smile of his, and you cant help but smile in return.

"Of course! Just... ask me for advice next time okay? Not Uzui."

[canyouhearthelight]

The Miys, Ch. 79

This was another chapter that was soooo fun to write.  Don’t worry, I’m not getting off the plot, swear.  So, thank you @charlylimph-blog for helping me flesh these pranks out. Also, thanks to @satan-parisienne and @baelpenrose for beta-reading.

Disclaimer: Food mentions below the cut.  I also want to clarify that I do not hate brussels sprouts.  I did, for several decades, though, and added that to one character in this chapter.

Given my track record with handling ship-wide issues in a personal capacity, I made a point to set up an actual appointment with both Grey and Xiomara to discuss our concerns.  Unfortunately, that meant it would be a few days before we all had time in our schedule.  All I could do in the meantime was try to do my actual job and pay more attention to odd behaviors of people around me.

I would like to submit for the record that I wasn’t succeeding with focusing on work terribly well.  And I wasn’t the only one.

“Seventeen,” Alistair greeted me as he arrived.  For what could only be dramatic emphasis, he removed a scarf and flung it over the back of the chair across from me.

“Ark’s temperature controlled,” I pointed out, staring at the scarf.  It actually looked soft.

“Seventeen different individuals,” he continued, ignoring my comment. “In a sum total of six groups, between three and eight people per group. Several were in more than one group.”

Wow. Go, Detective Worthington.  “This was just on your way from your quarters to my office?”

“From the cantina on deck fourteen, actually.” He stalked over to the food console, returning with a plate of food and two beverages.

“So, one, that’s an even shorter walk than the one from your quarters.”

He nodded around a forkful of pasta before swallowing. “Which makes it even more concerning.”

“True.” Taking the tea he offered me, I gestured at his penne.  Part of me was pleased to see it was one of my recipes from Before that I added to my profile once I learned how. “I thought you just ate?”

“I attempted to, certainly.  However, there have been several issues with the consoles in the cantinas.  I was given to believe they were resolved, but somehow I still ended up with brussels sprouts instead of capers.” He glared at me archly. “You are well aware of how I feel about those atrocities.”

“Even if you did like them, I can’t imagine substituting capers for brussels sprouts and still coming even remotely close to whatever you asked for.”

Already, he was standing to dispose of his empty dish. “I was sure that your console would be safe, but I selected a dish without capers, either way.”

“That’s fair.” Although I was mildly confused why he thought the console in my office would be ‘safe’ from the malfunction he just mentioned, but I also had no idea about the consoles in the cafeterias acting up, so he may have a point.

I was about to ask for details regarding the people he had seen.  I really was. However, I was preempted by the actual trumpet from the Book of Revelation started screaming from the speaker in the ceiling of my office.  

“BAYYYYY-BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE shark, do do do do do do!”

I screamed and jumped hard enough to fall out of my chair, while Alistair had flattened himself against the wall in an effort to escape the cacophony. Covering my ears, I begged Miys to disable the speaker.  I was reasonably certain I was yelling it, but either way the noise cut off abruptly and I was able to get up off the floor.

“What the bloody hell - bloody hell!” Alistair jumped abruptly at the figure that was now standing in my office. I wasn’t surprised, either, when I looked.

Standing right by my now-closed door was a shorter-statured figure, wobbling on its feet.  I couldn’t even really see the face, because my eyes would not look away from the top of their head. Specifically the earmuffs perched on there.

Five. Pairs. Of. Them. One pair was standard noise cancelling, but two were fuzzy - one neon green, another sparkly purple - and the other two, while not fuzzy, did have patterns in similarly bright colors: one set pink and green plaid, one fluorescent yellow and blue stripes.  Yet another pair was dangling around the figure’s neck, along with what appeared to be two pairs of earplugs.  I was getting the idea that the blaring music was something they were familiar with, against their will.

While puzzling at the noise-blocking hardware, I finally noticed the words across the figure’s hoodie.  It very clearly said ‘Fuck this shit’, framed by delicate vines and flowers. “Charly?” I asked, completely confused, before realizing she likely couldn’t hear me.  I gestured for her to remove the headphones, and once she did, I tried again. “Charly.  What is going on?”

“I have not had a hot bath in two weeks. Every time I walk through a door, the room plays that awful song until I leave the room, and cold spaghetti squash should be illegal! Very, VERY illegal!” As she spoke, her voice choked up more and more, and by the time she finished she was crying in my office.  Again. “I can barely eat, I can only sleep if I’m exhausted and practically pass out…” She trailed off.

I got her seated and rubbed her arms.  Turning to Alistair, I spoke softly.  “Can you please bring some of the stew from screen six in my file?  And probably water for now.”  To Charly, I reassured her. “It’s your beef stew recipe, the one you gave me.  For whatever reason, my console here and the one at home never glitched out when the ones in the cafeterias did.”

She sniffed and nodded.  My assistant quickly returned, gently setting down the stew and warm bread, along with some butter.  He narrowed his eyes at me, sharply. “I took the liberty of also getting some butter for the bread, because clearly some of us are heathens who serve warm bread without butter.”

“Some of us like to spread cheese sometimes,” I defended myself. “Okay, hon.  First, I need you to drink at least half of that water so you don’t dehydrate from crying.”  A very tiny white lie.  The real reason was an old trick I learned back Before - humans aren’t wired to be able to cry and swallow at the same time, so we stop crying if we are drinking something.  

Once that kicked in, I let her dig into the stew.  Keeping a careful eye to make sure she didn’t accidentally inhale anything in the literal sense while demonstrating the figurative sense, I tried to figure things out. “First and foremost, has anything else happened, anything that could have caused you injury?”

“Juss annoyig,” she told me around a bite of bread. Swallowing, she clarified. “Anytime I try to bathe, I only get cold showers.  No hot water, even the sonic function gives me cold water.  I’ve had to resort to letting a bucket of water sit out long enough to be room temp.  Anytime I try to get any sort of food or drink other than water, all I get is cold, icky spaghetti squash.  You saw what happens when I walk into a room.” She gestured at the speaker on the ceiling. “I’m not even sure how you stopped that.”

“I had Noah disable the speaker entirely,” I admitted. “So, all mid-range psychological torture? All irritants, nothing actually dangerous in and of itself?”

“Except the fact that I’m so jumpy I can’t sleep, I guess.  This is the first thing I’ve eaten in two weeks that wasn’t something Coffey had to go get from a canteen, bring it back, and give it to me.  And even that only works if it isn’t something I actually like.”

“But there are over a dozen full-time food vendors?” I was so confused.

She rolled her eyes. “You know I don’t trust other people’s cooking.  Yours, yes. Tyche’s, yes. Mine, of course.  But that’s it.”

“Miss Harper,” Alistair interrupted, gentle but horrified. “You said it’s been two weeks….”

She waved the concern away. “Two weeks of eating food I don’t like but don’t gag on is way better than cold, yucky spaghetti squash or food that may have… crawly things in it. You do know that some people cook with…. those things, right?” She eyed him suspiciously.

“Objection withdrawn,” he sighed. “However, I do believe that part of what you are experiencing may be part of the wider issues we’ve been having with the food consoles.  All of the public ones have been malfunctioning recently, and every time they are reset, it happens again.  I nearly ate brussels sprouts today, for heaven’s sake!”

“Okay, seriously Alistair? They aren’t that bad. Stop being dramatic,” I scolded. When I turned back to Charly, she was staring at her lap, very focused on the hem of her sweatshirt.  Fear spiked through me like ice. “Charly? What is it? Did something else happen?”

“The consoles might be acting up because of what’s happening with me,” she admitted quietly.  “Not the other way around.”

Huh? “What do you mean?  You think the same person who is doing this to you is going to target everyone?” I could feel my panic levels rising.  Suspicious people, maybe a cult, were increasing in numbers throughout the ship.  Maybe they were sending a message? It was pretty well known that Charly was close with Tyche and myself - 

“IthinkthisishappeningbecauseofaprankIpulledandsomeonegotmad.” Once she finished blurting out her statement, she screwed her eyes closed and seemed to be waiting for something bad to happen.  When nothing happened - I don’t think Alistair even understood what she said, and I know I didn’t - she cracked one eye to peek at our faces.

“In English?” I asked, shaking my head.

“I think...I may have...broken? The food consoles? I might have played a prank? And someone didn’t like it?”

I fought the urge to go entirely limp as all the panic and dread I had been building up rapidly plummeted.  “So, all of this… you broke the ship… it’s all a prank war?”  She nodded, face scrunched up in embarrassed apology. I pinched my nose before running a hand down my face. “And you started it, you believe?”

“It wasn’t on purpose!” she cried.  “It was a harmless prank, I freaking swear. I programmed the food consoles to give boba tea as every one hundredth beverage dispensed. That’s it. I even made sure to program it to be sugar free! Just matcha tea, lactose-free milk, sugar substitute, and the little boba pearls.  At most, someone would get it, go ‘hey this isn’t what I asked for?’, try again, and get the right thing.”

“Except that’s not the worst thing that happened,” I prompted.

“No, it isn’t! After about…five days? Suddenly all thiiiiiiis,” she flailed expansively, “started happening!  There is no way you can tell me that I deserve all this for erroneous boba tea here and there.” Charly stared at me, pointedly.

To be honest, it really did seem like overkill. 

“Well,” I sighed. “The good news is, only a select few people have that level of access to the ship to do something so far reaching.” My fingers drummed on the table as I tried to think of ways to narrow our list of culprits further. “Obviously, they don’t mean you any actual harm, just a significant level of annoyance and inconvenience.  And it would have to be someone who would take boba tea to be a grievous insult apparently…” Fuck.  

My head snapped up as I leapt to my feet and bolted for the console. Once I had a boba tea, exactly the way Charly described, I took a huge pull from the straw. Chilled, clean flavor, no notable texture, not terribly sweet, no aftertaste…

And chewy boba pearls. Like little candies. Most importantly? They were squishy. 

“Mother fuck….”  Charly and Alistair both gave me questioning looks.  “I will one-hundred percent admit that your prank had very innocent intentions.  But before I tell you who did this, I want to be clear: absolutely no retribution, and no more dinking around in public resources. Deal?”  She nodded so hard I thought her neck may break.  “Someone with an enormous food aversion to anything ‘squishy’ ended up with one of your drinks.” I jiggled mine for emphasis. “And I am willing to bet they got a mouthful of tapioca before they realized it.  They absolutely knew there was no error - they only drink water, and they are extremely sensitive to caffeine.  Once they realized it was a deliberate error? There was no saving you, girl.”

Her eyes widened to the size of saucers, and I could see everything falling into place.  “Oh no. Nonononononono.  I didn’t think Derek used the public consoles!  I never would have done it if I knew that!  Or exempted him, or something… Oh gosh, I have to go apologize. I feel awful!”  With that, she bolted from the room, throwing a “thanks for the stew!” over her shoulder on the way out.

Alistair just shook his head. “She really pulled a prank on the one person we can’t keep out of anything on the ship, who we have to rely on his good intentions?”

“Obviously, not on purpose,” I pointed out.

“It still doesn’t explain the small cabbages that contaminated my lunch.”

Taking a long pull from my tea, I tilted my head side to side. “It really kind of does.  Charly hates capers with a passion, based solely on what they look like.”

“Madam Councillor. Brussles. Sprouts. Surely there was a better option.”

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[comicgeekscomicgeek]

Their Hero Academia - Chapter 72: Summer Shorts Part 1

Presenting the next installment of my on-going, nextgen, MHA fic! Earlier chapters can be found here

Shota Shinso in Student-Teacher Conference

At the knocking at his apartment door, Shota Shinso paused the video he’d been watching, a special counting down the top ten most amazing Hero battles from the previous year.  The votes for the battles had come from an online poll, which he’d voted in, so they were probably a little on the biased side rather than being truly objective or anything like that.  But he had to admit that most of the ones which had made the cut were the same ones he would have chosen.  

Unsurprisingly, Uncle Izuku had made the list twice, for his fights against Doom-Fist and the Maximums. Shoto was on the list two times as well; Ingenium and Gale Force had both made it on there once, as had Kestrel and Rodeo.  Red Riot and Real Steel shared a spot on the list.  And then there had been Ground Zero’s battle against Megastorm…

He’d had to fast forward through that.  It had sent his mind flashing back to the day of the Nomu attack.  He’d heard the sounds of tearing flesh and the Nomu’s terrible scream. His hands had felt wet with Ground Zero’s blood as he’d desperately tried to provide what first aid he could.  His nostrils had filled with the coppery smell…

It had taken everything he had not to scream and destroy the apartment. At least with Mom and Dad both at work, there hadn’t been anyone else around to see.

He’d been doing so well.   He’d actually passed his exams at school and made good use of his Quirk during the Heroics final exam.  He was able to be around Kirishima-Bakugo without flinching or expecting her to be mad at him.  He only had nightmares about it every so often.  

He hadn’t counted on what actually seeing Ground Zero would do to him.  Shota had been doing a good job of keeping himself from thinking about him. He’d hidden away his Ground Zero posters, statues, toys, and other merchandise.  He’d set his phone and internet browser to screen any mention of him. If he kept himself from thinking about Ground Zero, then he could keep himself from thinking about what happened.

Shota knew what happened wasn’t his fault.  He’d been told that often enough now, had enough therapy that he could say it without feeling like it was a lie.  But it was still like standing on the edge of a cliff.  Somedays, it didn’t take much to send him over the edge.

Dumb, really.  He should have expected that Ground Zero would have been in such a video.  His fights had always been amazing to watch.  His Quirk, his strength, his skill, all of it was… had been simply amazing.

And maybe he wouldn’t be anymore.

Because of him.

Dang it, he was supposed to be moving past this!

He shut his eyes right for a moment, doing the calming exercises Hound Dog had taught him.  Deep breaths.  Focus his thoughts on where he was, what he could see.  Whoever was at the door knocked again, and his eyes snapped open as he got off the couch.  “Coming!” he called out.

He opened the door before they could knock again.

“Hey, kid.  Can we talk?”

…It was Ground Zero.

***

The park near his apartment was busy today, with lots of kids playing around, happy and carefree. He could see a group of elementary school-age kids using their Quirks to keep a Frisbee up in the air.  One had some kind of wind Quirk, another an arm-stretching Quirk, and the third and fourth, who looked like twins, seemed to have some kind of telekinetic push and pull Quirks.  He smiled, remembering doing the same kinds of games with Toshi, Shinji, Izumi, and the others as a kid.  Of course, there was the time he’d hit the Frisbee with a sonic blast and knocked it out of the park…

Maybe they ought to bring that back.  It’d be a fun game and good Quirk training!

He and Ground Zero sat on a bench, eating the ice cream they’d bought. Though lots of Pro Heroes, especially the Top Ten, went out in some measure of disguise when they were off the clock, Ground Zero didn’t bother.  He was very good at radiating “keep at least three meters away from me if you know what’s good for you vibes.” It was something his daughter was also extremely good at.

Ground Zero clearly wanted to talk, but Shota didn’t have any idea what it was about.  It was all he could do to keep from shaking and panicking. The ice cream gave him something to be present in the moment in, something else Hound Dog had taught him to do when he thought he was going to have a panic attack.  

“So,” he said quietly, “you wanted to talk?”

Ground Zero took a moment, as though sizing him up, then nodded.  “How you doing, kid?  Katsumi says you did pretty good during the exam.”  His voice lacked some of its usual hard edge.  The question sounded sincere.

Kirishima-Bakugo had talked about him?  And said he’d done good?  He wouldn’t have expected that.  Shota nodded. “It was really nuts!  Uncle Shota got actual bad guys to fight us!  Even Shadow-Thief!   Boy though, did Mom and Dad give him an earful about that!  Mom really doesn’t like her for some reason, maybe because Dad says she used to try and flirt with him whenever he’d try and catch her, but that’s silly, because they’ve been married forever now…  But yeah, I was one of the last ones left standing, and we zapped the big guy really good….”

It had made him feel like he could actually do something right.  It was a good feeling.  He’d actually helped his friends when it had really counted.  

“That’s good,” Ground Zero said, more indulgently than most adults did when he went on about something. “Sounds like you really kicked their asses.”

Shota actually laughed a little bit at that.  Ground Zero definitely had a way with words.  “Yeah, I guess we did.”   He frowned a little.  “What… what about you?  Are you doing okay?”

Ground Zero went quiet for a moment, before he went on.  “Getting better every day,” he said.  “Physical therapy three times a week.  Hasn’t been the challenge yet that can beat me.  Glasses and Tintin’s wives are working on a better prosthetic.  I’ll be kicking ass again before you can blink.”

It sounded reassuring. But it was still a challenge he wouldn’t have been facing if it hadn’t been for Shota.  If he hadn’t been trying to keep him safe… Ground Zero looked down for a moment, at his leg, then over at Shota, then sighed.  “You know this isn’t your fault, right, kid?”

Shota frowned.  He closed his eyes.  “Sometimes,” he said after a moment.  “Maybe not all the time.  But it’s hard not to think it was.”

“It wasn’t,” Ground Zero repeated, more forcefully this time.  He tossed the remains of his ice cream in the trash and put a hand on Shota’s shoulder. His grip was firm and strong. “Look at me, kid.”  He didn’t speak again until Shota was looking him in the eyes, something that took more willpower than he thought he had.  

“Listen,” Ground Zero said. “You, Shota Shinso, are not to blame for what happened to me.  Not one damn percent.  You got that?  Whatever sick f—er, bastard made that damn monster is to blame, not you.”

Shota nodded, mutely. He’d been told that so many times, from so many people.  Some days, he believed it.  Ground Zero though, was one of the most direct and honest people he knew.  If he blamed Shota, he’d have no problem letting him know.  If he didn’t blame him, maybe there was some truth to it.

“Good,” Ground Zero told him.  “And anytime that thought starts running through your head, I want you to punch it, hard, for me.  You picture it, shout kill and let it have it.  You got that?”

He nodded again, his head bobbing up and down quickly.  He could do that!

Ground Zero looked him over again.  He let out a puff of breath.  “Look… I ain’t good with words.  So maybe I’m not gonna tell this real well, but… Listen, I have been exactly where you are.”

“You?” Shota asked. “But you’re Ground Zero!  You’re not afraid of anything!  You’re the most confident Hero ever!”

Ground Zero shook his head. “You remember Kamino?  All Might’s last fight with that masked potato-faced freak?”

Who hadn’t heard of that? Uncle Izuku had told the story plenty of times of how he and his friends had gone to rescue Ground Zero from the League of Villains, while All Might had battled his long-time enemy.  It was the climax of all kinds of documentaries about All Might’s career. Everyone who was around and aware then had a story about where they were when they saw it happen.  They studied it in school!  He’d seen the video hundreds of times!  Shota nodded again.  

“I went through the same thing you’re going through,” Ground Zero said.  He gazed off into the distance.  “I blamed myself for causing All Might’s retirement.  I thought if I hadn’t been so weak, hadn’t screwed up and gotten captured, he wouldn’t have had to use up the last of his strength to save me.  I blamed myself, for weeks.  Without even realizing it, it affected everything I did.  I was even nastier and louder and angrier than usual.  I was such a shit, I’m amazed any of my friends stuck around.  But after I failed the Provisional License Exam, well… let’s just say it took Deku beating some sense into me for me to realize what I’d been carrying around.”

“Really?” Shota asked. He’d never heard this one before! “Uncle Izuku never said anything about that! And you always seem so confident! But you… you blamed yourself too?”

He knew Heroes got scared sometimes.  Uncle Izuku had talked about it, so had Uncle Denki, even Uncle Inasa had.  Uncle Shota even said that fear was a logical response sometimes.  And he knew they had doubts and worries.  But of all the Heroes in the world, he never would have expected Ground Zero would!

“Yeah, I did.  And there’s still times where I wonder what would have happened if I hadn’t been such an arrogant dumbass back then.”  He looked over and smiled a bittersweet smile, then gave Shota’s hair an affectionate tussle.  “So don’t go letting me hear you needed Toshi or Katsumi or somebody to beat you up, okay?  There’s nothing wrong with needing help.  Hell, you start feeling down, you call me, day or night, okay?”

Shota nodded rapidly again, the bad thoughts banished for the moment.  He knew they’d be back.  “Okay!”

Seemingly satisfied with that, Ground Zero nodded.  “Which is kind of why I wanted to talk to you in the first place, kid.  You know how All Might’s taking over from Nedzu as principal?”

“Oh yeah!” Shota said. “He’s gonna be really awesome at it, I just know it!  He said he might still teach a few classes, but that we’re gonna get a new Heroics’ teacher!  He said they were looking into some people, but he didn’t really know who it was going to be…”

Ground Zero cleared his throat and interrupted him.  “It’s going to be me.”

“Oh, wow!”  Shota said.  It was only then that he realized what Ground Zero had actually said.  “Wait, what?”

A smile passed over the Hero’s face.  “It’s gonna be me.  All Might offered me the job before you all went off to Ponytail’s island.”

“Oooh,” Shota said. “You’d be really good at that!  I learned a whole bunch when I was your Intern! And Kirishima-Bakugo’s really super talented, so you must have taught her a whole lot too, and you’re one of the most awesome Heroes around, with one of the best fight records and…”

Ground Zero held up his hands.  “Breathe, kid.  Breathe. I know I’m pretty awesome.  So you’re damn right I’ll be a damn good teacher. Even if I have to drag some of your classmates forward kicking and screaming.”

Shota didn’t know who that would be.  All his friends and classmates worked so hard and had such amazing Quirks!  “But… why would you want to talk to me about that?” he asked.  He wasn’t family or anything.

Ground Zero gave him a small, sympathetic smile.  “Because I knew you were probably still blaming yourself.  Even though I told you not to.  I didn’t know how you’d take it if you had to see me every day.”

“What?” Shota asked. The question didn’t make any sense.

“Kid,” Ground Zero said patiently, “you practically had a damn panic attack when I showed up at your door.  You’re going to be seeing me every Heroics Class if I take this job.”  He tapped his knuckles against his knee.  It made a small metallic clang. “And you’ll be thinking about this.”

“That’s not,” he started to say, but stopped himself.  He can’t help but stare now, his eyes wide and wet.  What if Ground Zero was right?  “Maybe.”

This got him a nod. “That’s what I thought.  But here’s the deal.  If I’m going to be a teacher, then I’ve gotta look out for my students first.  Which means I have to look out for you, before I even teach a single class.”

Shota felt his eyes growing wet.  “But… but…”

“Aw, for the love of…” Ground Zero started, waving his hands rapidly.  “Don’t cry, kid!  I cannot deal with crying!  You’re worse than Deku, I swear…!”

Shota sucked in a breath and fought back his tears.  He couldn’t just cry like that in front of one of his heroes!  He wasn’t a baby, even if he was a little younger than all his classmates.  He was training to be a Hero.  He had to be strong!  

Ground Zero was being a Hero.  He was thinking of someone else, Shota, putting his needs first, even if it meant he didn’t get to be a teacher.  Shota… Shota couldn’t take that away from him!  And he’d be a good teacher too, he knew it!

And if he knew what to expect… then maybe he could be ready for it!  He could psyche himself up!  Hound Dog said that getting in the right mind space was important!  He’d even know him all kinds of exercises for how to do it.

“A Hero’s got to be brave,” he said finally.  “I can be brave too!”  He was almost sure he meant it.  He could do it!  He could do it!  He was getting better every day!  He had his bad days, but maybe if he really worked on it…

Then Ground Zero held his gaze and if Shota hadn’t known his Quirk was Explosion, he would have been certain he was reading his mind.  “All right,” he said.  “I believe you.  But I’m going to be watching you.  And I’m going to hold you to telling me if you start having trouble, got it?  You’re going to be a damn good Hero someday, kid. Especially with me in your corner.”

***

Chihiro Kaminari in Kiss and Make Up

“Chihiro! Chihiro!  Watch!  Watch me!”

Chihiro looked over to where her eight year old sister, Hikari, was playing on the monkey bars.  The purple-haired girl was hanging on by one hand, her other limbs dangling in the air.   “Okay, okay,” she said, “I’m watching.”

“Okay…  Watch!”  Hikari released all her fingers and Chihiro’s heart lurched.  If her little sister got hurt on her watch, she was going to be in a load of trouble!  She started rushing forward only to realize that Hikari wasn’t falling.  Despite her fingers not touching anything, her palm was still flat against the bar and she wasn’t falling.

Chihiro’s Cords perked up as she got closer, tiny sparks dancing along their tips.  There was enough electricity flying about that she could feel it.  The fact that Hikari’s hair was standing straight up was another clue.  She crossed her arms.  “Let me guess, Spark Plug,” she said.  “You’re using your Quirk?”

“Yep!” Hikari said proudly. “Daddy and I worked real hard on this one!”

Hikari’s Quirk was called Static.  It let her absorb ambient static electricity and release it and apparently also stick to things with it like a balloon.  She had to laugh a little bit though.  She and Dad had certainly driven Mon to yelling at them more times than she could count for doing dumb things with their own Quirks.  Her younger brother Reylo got yelled at less often, but only because his Quirk was sound-based and Dad couldn’t teach him anything dangerous.

Chihiro gave her a thumb’s up.  “Cool trick,” she said.  But she noticed that Hikari’s hair was starting to settle back down.  Her Cords were starting to spark less too.  She took a few steps forward and held out her arms, letting Hikari fall into them.

“Off!” Hikari said, looking surprised and annoyed.  “How come I fell?”

“Ran out of juice,” Chihiro told her.  “You don’t make your own electricity, remember?”

“Oh.  Right!  I knew that.”

Chihiro just laughed again and set Hikari down on the ground, letting her run off to the next piece of playground equipment.  Well, at least her little brother Reylo had half a brain.  One Kaminari ought to have at least half a chance.

“Stay where I can see you!” she called out.  “And that goes for you two too!”

She looked over to where her other charges (Heh.  Charges. Why was she always this funny when no one else was around?), a small brown-haired girl and a blond boy:  Mako Midoriya and Tai Kirishima-Bakugo, both five years old.  When the kids’ regular sitter had bailed, she’d volunteered to watch them.  She was already watching Hikari anyway and didn’t have any plans.  Plus she was getting two thousand yen each for the two of them.  They gave her a friendly wave.

There were also, she would readily admit, advantages to living in a gated community, including a private playground.  Almost all the families that lived here were Pro-Heroes, though there were also a few Support Company officers, and a few other careers, such as Mom’s split career as Hero and musician.  The kids certainly seemed to enjoy it anyway.   She’d already been ten by the time they’d moved in and was starting to get too “cool” for that kind of thing.

Of course, to hear Mom tell it, the reason they bought the house was all Dad’s fault.   Dad had brought home a Great Dane puppy instead of groceries… somehow.  Since Sparky was going to quickly get too big for their apartment, so they’d gone house shopping.  Of course, to hear Dad tell it, Kirishima-Bakugo’s dad had nearly flipped a gasket when he’d found out they were going to be neighbors…

Chihiro let a smile spread across her face as she watched the kids play.  Hikari was making herself dizzy, spinning around on the merry-go-round, while Mako and Tai were playing on the teeter-totter.  It was nice.  Peaceful even.  She could quietly zone out just a little bit.

“Stuck on kid duty too, Kaminari?”

Taken by complete surprise, she let out a cry of alarm as she turned.  Her Cords shot out and unleashed a mild pulse of electricity the second they made contact with… something.

“AAAAGGGGGGGGGGG!””

Shiro Monoma hit the ground with a small thump.

***

“You killed him!” Hikari shouted.  “Mom and Dad are gonna be so mad!”

Chihiro shot her sister a fierce look.  “No, I didn’t!” she protested.  But as she quickly turned her attention back to Monoma, she wasn’t so sure.

“He’s still breathing,” Monoma’s younger sibling said, sounding disinterested.  Takeru, right.  That was their name.  And non-binary too.  Important to remember.  Chihiro thought they were the same age as Tai and Mako, but they sounded like they were going on forty.  They gave him a look which suggested they’d long grown bored with seeing accidental misfortunes befall their older brother.

“She really made him go zap!” Mako said.  “He lifted up and then… Bzzzzt!”  As she talked, her hands copied the motions Monoma had gone through.

“Yeah!” Tai agreed. “I saw sparks!  It was so cool!”

Chihiro gulped and looked down at Monoma.  He was still breathing.  That was good.  She probably hadn’t hit him with that many volts.  He’d just surprised her.

“It’s not my fault!” she said, throwing her hands up in the air as she paced back and forth.  “He snuck up on me!”

“Uhhh.”  A noise from Monoma caught her attention instantly. His eyes fluttered open.  How could someone be electrocuted, fall in the grass, and still be so damn pretty?  Especially while wearing a t-shirt and shorts?  “What hit me?”

“You snuck up on her and she electrocuted you,” Takeru told him flatly.

“I did no such thing!” Monoma protested.  He ignored her hand up in favor of bouncing to his feet under his own power, dusting himself off once he landed.  

“You were doing that thing where you don’t make any noise,” Takeru said.  “No wonder she didn’t hear you coming.”

“Yeah!” Chihiro said, pointing at him.  Maybe she could spin this as his fault after all!  “Why do you gotta ninja around all the time?!”

Monoma seemed offended at that, putting a hand to his chest.  “I did no such thing!  I do not “ninja around!’”  He wilted under her glare ever so slightly, however.  “Well… perhaps I do have a bit of a silent tread.  I can apologize for that, at least.  I’m sorry.”

Great, how was she supposed to be mad at him when he was apologizing?  Completely unfair!  She didn’t want to be thinking about him at all!  “Yeah, well…,” she said, “I probably shouldn’t have zapped you.  You okay?”

He produced a flick comb from his pocket and fixed his hair.  “No harm done, I suppose,” Monoma said.  

Chihiro realized the children were all watching them still.  “Okay kids,” she said, waving her hands vaguely in the direction of the playground.  “Show’s over. Go play!”

Hikari crossed her arms. “Aw, I wanted to see you zap him again!”

“Go!” Chihiro repeated, pointing more dramatically this time.  Her little sister turned tail at that.  Meanwhile, Takeru was being dragged off by Mako and Tai under half-hearted protests.

“So…,” she ventured, looking back at Monoma.  This was definitely awkward.  Why the hell didn’t she keep the kids around?  Now all she could think about was how he’d kissed her and how Mika had said she should date him!  Maybe she should shock him again, run away, move to a new city, start a new life on the run singing for coins on street corners…

Okay, maybe not that bad.

“Um, yes,” Monoma said, and she was somehow glad to see the awkwardness was mutual.  It was so rare to see him as anything less than composed that she considered it a victory even in embarrassment.

And then he said the most dangerous words of all.

“Can we talk?”

***

They were far enough away that they wouldn’t be overheard, but not so far away that they couldn’t keep an eye on the kids.  Hikari had met up with one of her friends and Chihiro gave a wave to the kid’s parents before giving Monoma as much of her attention as she could.

“So,” she said.  Her Cords make small circles through the air, as she crossed her arms.  “You wanted to talk.  Talk. I’m listening.”

“Ah, yes, well,” Monoma began.  Alarm bells were already ringing in her head.  Granted, her guard was always up around him.  Sure, she’d eat lunch with him with Mika, Koda, and Fukidashi or Tetsutetsu.  He was tolerable in small doses.  Especially if he kept his mouth shut.  But she’d never seen him as at a loss for words as this.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I shouldn’t have just kissed you like that without asking.  It wasn’t very gentlemanly of me.  I was… overcome with emotion at resolving some of my own issues, and let my exuberance get the better of me.”

Chihiro blinked slowly. She definitely hadn’t been expecting an apology.  Even with the one he’d given a few minutes ago, she wasn’t even sure he really knew how to apologize.  But she looks over and he was so earnestly apologetic that even her background level of irritation at him started to fade.  “It’s, ah, it’s fine,” she said.  “You were excited.  Happens.”

He looked a bit surprised. “That’s happened before?”

She had to laugh at that. “No, that one was definitely a first.” Her left Cord shot out and gave him a soft poke in the chest.  “Definitely wasn’t expecting my first kiss to be you though.”

He looked offended at that. “That was not a first kiss.  All I did was kiss you on the cheek!”

“A kiss is a kiss!” she shouted at him, moving closer.  “Doesn’t matter where it was!”

“You’re out of your mind!”

“I thought you were apologizing!”

“I did!  You were the one who tried to turn it into a semantics argument!”

“It’s not semantics if I’m right!  That! Was!  A!  Kiss!”

Their faces were mere centimeters from each other now.  His eyes were big, blue, and ever so close.  He really was just too ridiculously pretty for his own good. Probably spent more time in front of the mirror than she did.  About the only person who might outdo him in the hair and skin care regime was Aoyama.

“That wasn’t a kiss!” Monoma snapped.  “If I’d really wanted to kiss you, I’d have done it like this!”

Before she could blink, he’d reached out and put his arms around her, spinning her around into a low dip, before planting his lips on hers.  Her eyes went wide as he held the kiss for a long moment, before spinning her back into a standing position.

“What the hell?!”  she snapped.  “What the hell was that?!”  Her Cords flew about her head like angry snakes, sparking with electricity.

“I… I don’t… it just happened!” Monoma said, backing away from her nervously.  He looked ready to run and hide.  Good!  Who did he think he was, kissing her like this was some made for tv romantic movie where they yelled and kissed?!

She pointed her Cords at him aggressively, taking aim, her face flush with anger.  “I oughta just take you out!”

His eyes widened in surprise, but then he smiled that same smug, irritating, and entirely too good looking smile.  “Well.. Why not?” he asked.  “I am finding your company surprisingly enjoyable, even without Mika as a barrier.   Pick me up at seven tomorrow evening then?”

Her mouth dropped open. She could feel her mental footing slipping away as she shifted lanes from furious to baffled in the space of an eye blink.  Mika’s advice to give him a chance came back to her.  And she definitely wasn’t about to admit that she’d really enjoyed that kiss. But the other hand, he was absolutely infuriating. And sure, he’d shown her a more vulnerable side back at school…

Her Cords sagged, the sparks fading.   “…What?”

“That, ah, that is… if you want to,” he said. Awkwardness replaced the smugness.  And now he had his hands up, protecting his face, as he backed up. “We could go on a date.  And I promise no more kissing.”

The words unless you want to hung silently in the air.

“Why me?” she asked, after letting him squirm uncomfortably for a moment.  “I know Mika’s your ex.  Going from her to me has to be a pretty steep downgrade.”

He looked puzzled for a moment, until his eyes widened in realization. He crossed his arms. “You do remember I used to date her before she, ah, blossomed. I’m not so shallow as to be purely attracted to… that.”

Okay, he did have a point there.   “Okay, but the first question still stands.  You’re all fancy pants and I’m… me.  In fact, up until you kissed me, I was pretty sure you didn’t even like me.”

A blush spread across Monoma’s face and he smiled sheepishly.  “Mika insists I have a thing for women who can beat me up.  You do fall into that category, of course, but the fact remains that you are a fascinating and attractive woman.  You’re talented, with varied interests, and you are entirely willing to call me out to my face when I’m being a pretentious asshole. After some rather blunt conversations and realizations… I’m… trying harder not to be that person anymore.”

Okay.  That was… actually pretty respectful sounding.  Which was definitely a first for him when it came to her.  Sounded like somebody had called him out.  Mika, maybe?  Or Tetsutetsu?  Koda was too nice to have done it…

“Okay, fine,” she said.  She tried to project with her tone that she was doing him a favor, not that she was actually possibly maybe kind of interested in him.  “We can go on a date.  On one, no, two conditions.”

He seemed surprised at that.  “All right, I completely understand if you don’t wish to….  Wait, what?”

“One, no more kissing me out of the blue.  You try it, and I’ll shock you so bad you’ll never get your hair to look right again.”

He chuckled. It was actually somewhat pleasant when it wasn’t paired with taunts.  “A tremendous threat.  Very well. And the other?”

“Don’t you dare tell Ojiro about this. Or put it on-line or anything where she can somehow find out about it. I’ll never hear the end of it.”

Monoma nodded.  “I suppose that’s reasonable.  So long as you do the same with regards to Fukadashi.  I don’t need her comparing me to some anime or manga more than she already does.”

He had a point there.  Fukidashi was weird.  And given the company she kept, that was saying something. “Deal.  It’s a date.”

“YAY!”

Chihiro’s head snapped around and she saw that the kids were staring at them. Hikari was the one who’d shouted, but they all looked enthralled.  Well, everyone but Takeru did.

“How long have you been watching?!” she demanded.

“Long enough,” Takeru said.  They looked over at Chihiro.  “You should have shocked him again.  Otherwise he won’t learn anything.”

She had to laugh at that.  “Okay,” she said.  “You, I like.”

“Yay!  A date!” Mako said.  “My big sister went on a date too!  With Haruto Sero!”  She danced about as she talked, kicking up a little bit dust.  “Ah… ah… choooo!”

Chihiro’s eyes went wide as Mako’s Fire-Breath Quirk went active with her sneeze.  Instantly, she tackled Monoma to the ground, as a blast of flame went through where his head had just been.  Her face went flush as she realized how close they were again.  Hastily, she shoved herself up and off him.

She offered Monoma a hand up and this time he took it.  His hands weren’t anywhere near as soft as his pretty boy imagine would have suggested, she realized.  “Sorry about that.  She doesn’t have full control of her Quirk yet.”

“Quite, quite all right,” Monoma said, sounding a bit shook from his near-fire experience.  He was blushing too, she noticed.  He dusted himself off.  “But seven, tomorrow then, if that’s agreeable to you?”

“Yeah, all right,” she said.  

Great.  That gave her more than a day to figure out how to explain to her dad she was dating a Monoma.

One date.  Not dating.

She definitely wasn’t thinking about kissing him.  …Dating him!  And she wasn’t thinking about that either!

…Crap.

[rorykillmore]

so today is @tailsthesales  and as a birthday fic he requested a piece fitting tails into a transformers au!  so. i gave it my best shot. imagining tails & co as autobots was actually EXTREMELY fun. this is idw-verse (fitting, i figure,) aaaand takes place directly after the dark cybertron arc where shockwave has almost destroyed all of reality, just for a point of reference.

so happy birthday, giz!!! i know we are all experiencing some rocky times right now, but i hope you manage to enjoy it. <3  you have been such a consistently warm and engaging presence in my life in all the time we’ve been friends and co-admins, and i endlessly appreciate how quick you are to support my ideas and encourage my writing. hopefully this fic serves to do the same for yours, because i can’t WAIT to see more of tails in the future!!

“Ha. Sonic? Slow down? The war may be over, the universe may have almost ended, and Megatron may be an Autobot, but some things still are never gonna change.”

“Alright, alright, alright. Head count. Everyone sit down for a head count.” Rodimus raises his voice to be heard over the crowds, and seems... honestly, rather taken aback when people actually listen. “...Okay, one: wasn’t expecting that to work. Two: there are way too many of you to actually count, so nevermind.”

Tails actually hears Knuckles snort.  “And this is what happens when you slap ‘Prime’ on the end of your name and call yourself a leader.”

“Hey, come on, cut him some slack,” Sonic says, astoundingly cheerful for someone who is presently laid out on a portable operating slab. But then, he’s always been unflinching about putting his life in Tails’ hands.  “He did just help save the universe.”

“We all did,” Knuckles grumbles.

“I don’t see too much damage,” Tails reports, trying to distract them both with some good news.  “That Ammonite’s shot totally missed your transformation cog, which is great! This coulda got ugly.”

“Have I told you lately how much I love your bedside manner?” Sonic chuckles, looking up at him. “But thanks, Tails. Close me up and lets get back out there! I’m sure there’s a lot of injured Autobots who could still use our help.”

The three of them - as Ratchet, the medic Tails looks up to most, once said - make quite a team.  Sonic is a racer-turned-Autobot-frontliner who likes to play the hero nearly as often as Rodimus does (Tails supposes that might be why he’s so quick to defend him), Knuckles is an ex-Wrecker who joined up with them during his quest to lead a life with less... well, wreckage (not that they always avoid it), and Tails himself is a helicopter bot and a medic who just recently completed his training. Together, they form Team Sonic (after some mild debate between Sonic and Knuckles -- which Tails had stayed out of, because he just didn’t think “Team Tails” had the same ring to it), and they’ve stuck together since even after the war officially ended.

Tails definitely isn’t complaining. They’re stronger together -- and war or no war, the universe still needs their help! 

...As recently evidenced by, uh, Shockwave trying to destroy it. Thank Primus they all got out of that one okay, Sonic’s minor interior injuries aside. 

He closes Sonic up once everything is back in working order, and predictably, the former racer is back on his feet in an instant. Tails has never exactly known him to be the patient type.

“Try and take it easy for a little while, just in case,” he warns gently regardless.

Knuckles barks out a laugh.  “Ha. Sonic? Slow down? The war may be over, the universe may have almost ended, and Megatron may be an Autobot, but some things still are never gonna change.”

“Megatron is a... what?”  Tails turns to him, optics bright with disbelief, certain he must have misheard. Even Sonic stops dead in his tracks, waiting for the punchline.

Knuckles shrugs, almost uncomfortably. “Just a rumor that’s going around.”

Tails has to admit, it’s not a very plausible rumor. The feared leader of the Decepticons? The guy with the body count in the billions? An Autobot?

Sonic crosses his arms. “Unbelievable. People will say anything.”

“Everyone here accounted for?” Ultra Magnus’s voice booms above them as his rounds finally bring him to their group. Tails straightens up instinctively and gives Magnus a quick salute for good measure, since, well. That’s the kind of thing Magnus appreciates.

“Yes sir! Sonic had a gunshot wound, but it wasn’t serious.”

“Tails patched me right up, as per usual,” Sonic asserts, giving Tails a quick, confident smile that has Tails beaming back at him.

Ultra Magnus seems satisfied by that report.  “Very good. Listen,”  He pauses, turning to scrutinize Tails specifically, and Tails goes still.  “Optimus wants to speak to you.”

There’s a moment of silence as the three of them take that in.

“Prime?” Knuckles finally and impulsively blurts out.

Ultra Magnus gives him a deadpan look in response.  “Do you know another Optimus?”

None of them do, of course, but Tails can’t help but share in Knuckles’ confusion. Why would Optimus Prime want to speak to him? If there’s a de facto leader of their little team, it’s Sonic, after all. 

But when he turns to meet his friend’s gaze, Sonic is staring somberly but encouragingly back at him, and Tails takes heart in his silent show of support. He turns back to Magnus carefully.  “Er, sure, Ultra Magnus. Sure thing. Um -- now?”

“Whenever you have a moment.”  Ultra Magnus ticks their names off on his datapad and starts to move on.  Then he pauses, glancing shortly over his shoulder. “I wouldn’t keep him waiting.”

Tails is pretty sure Magnus didn’t mean for that to sound as ominous as it did. A good sixty percent of what comes out of Magnus’ mouth is, notoriously, unintentionally ominous just by virtue of him having absolutely no sense of humor (not that Tails would ever say that to his face). He looks back at his friends again. Knuckles shrugs, and Sonic gives him a thumbs up.

“You guys’ll be okay?” Tails still asks just to make sure.

“Golden,” Sonic assures him.  “Go on and see what the big guy wants. We’ll wait for you.”

Tails takes heart in knowing he doesn’t have to question that for a second.

When he finds Optimus, though, he looks more... harrowed, somehow, than Tails expected. Maybe it’s just that Tails is used to him looking so unshakable, though comparatively, Optimus still looks a lot less shaken than the rest of them. It makes Tails wonder what really did happen with Megatron.

Then again... the battle hadn’t been easy on any of them. It’s not a stretch to say that there’s probably not an unshaken ‘bot among them.

“Sir?” Tails greets, standing to respectful attention none the less.  “You wanted to see me?”  

“Yes, Tails. Thank you for lending me a few moments of your time.  I know you must want to be with your team right now.”  Optimus pauses, and Tails tries not to waver under his scrutiny.  “Are they all alright?”

“We’ve had worse scrapes, sir!” Tails assures him, and then winces a little, because that makes all the lives that have just been lost seem horribly trivial.  “ -- I just mean! We were lucky, this time. Sonic got shot, but I patched him right up.”

Optimus nods slowly.  “Ratchet tells me he commends you on your medical skill.”

It takes a second for that to sink in.  “Commends -- ?”  Tails stumbles over his own words.  Ratchet? The Ratchet?  The Autobots’ most famous and accomplished medic?  If-Tails-Had-A-Hero-Besides-Sonic-Himself Ratchet?   

“Oh,” is all he ends up saying,and he winces immediately and tries to amend:  “Wow. That’s... quite an honor, sir.”

“Well, he isn’t one to give out easy praise.”  Optimus’ tone sounds a little warmer now.  “Which is why I had... hoped to ask you for a favor.”

Name it,  Tails wants to say,  whatever you need!  But, he reminds himself, that’s not exactly his call to make.  Sonic is the de facto leader of their team, and even if Tails was to act individually, he... wouldn’t want to do it without consulting his friends. Still. To even be asked, by Optimus Prime no less, is...

It’s...

“What is it?” Tails asks, focused and somber.

Optimus barely hesitates, in a way most ‘bots wouldn’t recognize, in a way Tails only just manages to catch.  “The war may be over. Shockwave may be gone, and the threat he posed along with him, but... I fear there are dangerous days yet to come.”

It’s not exactly reassuring. Tails represses the urge to shift his weight nervously. Is there some lingering threat Optimus is still worried about... ?

“Will you stay here on Cybertron?”  Optimus finishes his request finally.  “At least for the duration of Megatron’s trial?”

“Megatron is -- going on trial?” Tails blurts out before he can stop himself. Again, he thinks back to Knuckles’ rumor.

“He says he plans on pleading guilty. If that proves true... it won’t be a long one.”

The list of Megatron’s crimes is so immeasurably extensive that Tails understands the worry of the alternative. To contest each and every charge could take years.

And, after all, it’s Megatron.  It’s not unreasonable to wonder if he has something else up his sleeve.

“But want to account for every possibility, in the meantime,” Tails provides, nodding to himself.

“At the very least, some of the Decepticons won’t stand for it. Ratchet wants as many medics on standby as possible. And... I wanted to request you specifically.”   

Tails’ spark feels like it’s fizzling in his chest.  “...Why?”

“Because you’ve held onto your kindness, all this time,” Optimus replies heavily.  “And I think we’re about to need a lot of that.”

It should make Tails swell with pride. But for a moment, it only makes him sad. What will become of them now, their kind, who have only ever known war with one another for millions and millions of years? 

But whatever the future holds, Optimus needs him today.  Resolutely, Tails answers, “I’ll have to ask my team. I dunno what the plan was, as far as staying on Cybertron goes, but... if Sonic thinks we’re needed here, I’m sure he won’t say no.”

“Thank you. Even just for considering the request,” Optimus’ gratitude is resolute, and Tails can’t help but smile in response.  “You know where to find me, whenever you’ve made your decision.”

“We won’t keep you waiting long,” Tails promises, and giving him a wave, turns to make his way back to his friends. In a way, maybe it’s a good thing they already have another mission ahead of them.  Primus knows none of them have ever been the type to stand still.

[kgveom]

friends // jackson [01]

y’all its finally here. i’m finally writing this and getting it out. remember these are all real life events just not with jackson (obviously). as i said before this whole situation is still fairly fresh and close to my heart. it’s gone beyond where it was when i originally started planning this so i have no idea exactly how long it’s going to be. also, as it is based on real events, there’s still plenty going on in real time. i hope y’all stick around to hear this, mostly because it may be my best outlet as a coping mechanism. i’m going to write it regardless.

+ + +

friends // jackson

word count: 2k {not edited}

warnings: mention of drugs and some suggestions of intimacy.

+ + +

You threw your head back on the headrest of the driver’s seat you were sitting it, glancing up at your rear-view mirror. You were heading back from the store that you went to, to pick up medicine for your unruly headache. Glancing back down before the light turned green, you looked at the time. It was close to seven in the evening. You had been battling with yourself all day whether or not you wanted attending an open house for one of your friends that got married. Not just any friend though, one of your ex-boyfriends. You didn’t have a reason or a right to show up, considering you weren’t even invited. His sister told you about a week or two prior, most likely not knowing that you hadn’t been invited. You spent the whole day telling yourself you weren’t going to go, but as you parked your car in front of your house, you decided there was no harm in going and you were likely to go unnoticed anyway since you weren’t even sure who was going to be there. 

After taking the medicine you purchased, putting on makeup, fixing up your unwashed hair, and grabbing the closest dress you could find, you were out the door 45 minutes later and heading down the street to the church building where the open house was being held. 

Walking into the building, you saw a lot of unfamiliar faces and a few familiar ones in the distance. You stood in a line that didn’t have a clear objective. Beside you were tables of pictures from your friend’s wedding as well as his other sister’s wedding who had gotten married a couple weeks before her brother. You soon realized the line you were standing in was to say hi and hug the new couples and exchange some small talk, which you had zero interest in participating in. Stepping out of line, you looked around the room and quickly spotted the familiar faces you had seen earlier. You hadn’t talked to most of them in years, but standing alone in a room full of people wasn’t anything more than uncomfortable for you. You bee-lined straight to the one person you considered your brother. “Hey,” he smiled, reaching out to you for a hug. “It’s been awhile! Glad you could make it here! How are you doing?”

You shrugged, “I’m doing alright.”

“How’s your boy doing?” he asked.

You smiled at the thought of your boyfriend of a year and a half, “He’s doing good, I think. He’s not great at communicating over email, but I think he’s enjoying Atlanta,” you paused. “I miss him a lot.”

“Two years will go by faster than you think.”

You nodded. Everyone was telling you that. You knew they were trying to reassure you but the more you were reminded of it, the more you longed for it to be over. 

Eventually, you found yourself in what seemed to be a mini high school reunion, standing amongst people that didn’t like you, that had no particular feelings toward you, and one person you weren’t very fond of yourself. You quickly grew tired of standing and pulled up a chair beside the group. That was when you were faced with the one person you had hated for years.

“Hey,” he grinned as he said your name. “It’s good to see you again.”

Your chest felt tight for a moment as memories of him flooded in your brain. “Jackson,” you nodded. “Good to see you too,” you smiled as you reminded yourself that your goal while your boyfriend was gone, was to grow and not hold grudges. What a better person to start with than the person you hated for almost six years. 

“What have you been up to?” he rubbed his hands together before clasping them, resting his elbows on his knees causing his body to lean forward.

“Just hanging out at the moment. Not going to school and working starts back up in August. Been seeing someone for over a year now,” your hands clasped around your knee. 

“Oh, how’s that been?” He rose his eyebrows.

You continued to small talk as you smiled, talking about one of your favorite people. You returned his question and he told you all about his job as a florist and what other things he’s been up to. Before you knew it, he was by your side for the rest of the night. 

The group of you escaped to a classroom in the building as you all shared what’s been going on in your lives. You remained mostly silent, listening to the others talk. You still felt a tad out of place.

None of you were aware about how much time had actually passed and before anyone knew, the new husband walked in around 9:40 to tell everyone that they were done cleaning up and it was time to leave.

“Hey, so, we’re all going to meet up somewhere, yeah?” Your friend from earlier, John, had spoke up. 

“I’m down,” Kara had spoken up, loudly, before everyone else chimed in.

You sighed as everyone spoke, having every intention to head straight home regardless.

“Sonic? Or where do we want to go?” John turned to talk to everyone as we walked out of the building. “Do we want to go to Jackson’s?”

Everyone chimed their approval again, except Jackson who just kind of went with it. 

“I don’t even have a ride back to my place,” Jackson awkwardly laughed.

“I’ll give you one,” John offered, but Jackson anxiously declined.

“You’ll give me a ride, right?” He turned to you. “Please, I don’t want to sit in the car with John again, or have him see my place right now,” he whispered.

Just like that, your plans for the night had completely changed as you agreed to give him a ride. “You’ll have to tell me how to get to your place though,” you grabbed your keys out of your purse. “I’ve never been.”

“Oh, it’s just my parents place. You know, the apartments on the side of the house? I live in one of those.”

You shook your head as the both of you climbed into your seats, “That still doesn’t help me.”

“You know where I live,” he seemed taken aback. 

“Not at all, I’ve only been there once.”

He seemed astonished that you’ve never been to his house but reminded him about how much you didn’t like him for the past six years. He agreed that was fair and then started directing you were to go.

Upon walking into his apartment, you were a bit surprised at the scene in front of you. There was a coffee table supporting a dab rig and various other drug paraphernalia below it. “This is why I didn’t want John coming over here,” he walked over, picking up the dab rig, and walked it into his room. “You can sit on the couch, make yourself comfortable.”

“He said he was going to go home and change,” you slipped your hands along the side of your dress as you took a seat.

“That’s what he said,” he walked back into the room. “But he would’ve walked in here and never left and I just don’t want anyone to actually see all of this,” he motioned around the table before going back to cleaning it up. “And I’m sorry you have to.”

“Doesn’t he know though?”

“Just because he knows doesn’t mean I want him to see it all. I don’t want people to think I’m just some drug addict, y/n,” he stated, rather matter of factly. “Would you like a smoothie?”

“A smoothie?”

“Yeah, I’ve got some frozen fruit in the freezer. I’m offering it to you now because once everyone gets here, they’re all going to want one too, but I don’t have enough for everyone.”

“Aren’t you quite the host. What kind of smoothie?” You leaned forward.

It took about 40 minutes before everyone started showing up. You sat next to Jackson on the couch with your smoothie. His arm was around the back of the couch, over your shoulders but not actually touching you. The group of you talked a bit but it seemed like most of it was left back at the church building everyone had come from. Instead, it was agreed that everyone was going to watch Ricky and Morty. You all sat there for about two hours before three of the four people who arrived, decided to leave. The other, Kara, was seemingly asleep on the couch. Leaving just you and Jackson together. 

“Thank goodness,” he sighed. “I thought they would never leave,” he closed the door behind them and sat back down next you.

This time, you leaned a little more towards him. The night had felt odd, like there was some type of sexual tension lingering in the air. You had been waiting for it all night. You knew there was no way this night was ending without the two of you kissing. And if you were being honest, it was driving you crazy that he hadn’t yet. The Jackson you knew in high school wouldn’t have waited this long and you were just about ready to accept that it wasn’t happening. This aided you some relief.

You knew you were sending him all the signals that it was okay to. You were now fully leaning against him with his around around you, looking up at him, trying your best to focus on his eyes. That’s when you noticed his gaze switched between your eyes and your lips, and before you knew it, the two of you were tangled at mouth. 

Pulling apart, you let out a small laugh, “Thank goodness, you finally did that. I’ve literally been anticipating it all night.”

He laughed too, “Really? I wanted to make sure you were okay with it before I did anything. I needed all the signals before I made any attempt to do anything.”

“What signals?” You furrowed your brows.

“Your body language, your eyes, and your lips. You give off signals that way. Those are the top three. Your eyes being one of the most important.”

Your face twisted again. You knew Jackson would mention stuff like this in high school, but you’ve never talked to him about it.

“Your pupils dilate when you’re aroused.”

You blushed.

“You can’t control that. There’s no need to be embarrassed by it. Now, come here,” he readjusted how he was resting on the couch and opened his arms, inviting you to lay next to him. 

The two of you spent the night on the couch talking until you grew tired around three in the morning. The both of you forgot about Kara who was lying on the couch at the other end of it. He had been very adamantly and openly talking about his dislike towards her and you grew anxious at the thought of her hearing all of it. Although you and Kara were no longer friends, you knew her mental state probably wouldn’t be able to handle the things Jackson had said.

Moving to his bedroom, you took some of his clothes he had offered to you, so you didn’t have to wear the dress anymore. The two of you tangled yourself together in the sheets. The two of you continued to talk and heavily kiss, some of his touches caused you to freeze and as a reaction, you corrected his hands and where they traveled to. Time escaped the two of you and the morning sun crept in behind his dark but thin curtains that covered a long, slender window that traced the top of his wall just barely below the ceiling.  

You cuddled up to him for a bit before turning your back to him. His arm wrapped around your wasted, pulling you closer to him. By the time the both of you drifted off to sleep, it was 6:30 in the morning. 

[lonelylavenderluke]

When old things are new (1/?)

A bump in the night

Thirteenth!Doctor x Regenerated!Jenny

“Lying little Rat!”

“Liar! Sir! Sir! She’s a liar!”

A young brunette almost raven haired teenager was being held onto by a group of older looking boys.

“What is it know, Codsworth?” The elderly teacher enquired upon seeing the students standing in front of his desk. “Genevieve’s been lying in class sir, spreading nasty rumours about people haven’t you rat” the oldest of the boys spat digging his fingers into her arm where he had a hold of her, she hissed before trying to defend herself. “No sir, please I wasn’t lying I swear I wasn’t, Mars used to have oceans and rivers everything earth has on it before the Shalka came to our universe and tried to turn the planet into a black hole” the raven haired girl exclaimed reciting the tale as if it were only yesterday to her.

“Now see here Miss Smith.. just because you come from that home were many delinquents such as yourself are abandoned, does not mean that you have the right to be making up tall tales that go against the laws of both nature and science itself” the man sneered whilst pointing an accusing finger at her, “now all of you out before I give you all an after school” he dismissed them as the boys let the girl go before she disappeared out the school the moment the bell went for the end of the day.

“I wasn’t abandoned.. I’m just lost...” Genevieve murmured as the fresh autumn breeze blew through her hair as she stumbled through the leaves that littered the floor. “Just a couple more years, Jenny just a couple more years and then it’s back to searching for dad....” she sighed heavy heartedly remembering the first few things that she could remember of her first regeneration.

“Two hearts... just like a time lord” she’d been told so many times by people whom she had come across in her 500 or so years alive.

She spent the first few hundred years exploring the galaxy helping where she was needed, until a hundred or so years ago when she finally decided to go and search for the man who had thought she was dead. “Where are you space man?” She���d often ask whilst staring out of her bedroom window up at the stars waiting for a sign her father would appear.

As she approached the orphanage where she had spent most of this regeneration, she shivered at the chillingly horrifying building that stood out against the surrounding woods that the small village backed onto.

“Jenny! Jenny..Jenny your back! Your back!” Three crying voices echoed in the quite air as several small bodies collided into her own. Catching her self before being thrown completely off balance she belt down taking the children into her arms. “What happened?” She hushed them as they cried into her coat, “it was in the cupboard... Jamie wanted to play with the plane that Sister Brenda put in the cupboard...” the eldest of the children in her arms, a small boy called Louis whimpered as the other two nodded.

“Jenny! It happened again!” An older voice shouted as thundering foot steps approached them. Two older children stood in front of the time lord and the three young children, “they were playing and then we heard them scream and a loud crashing sound... the windows were wide open and the vases had been knocked over” the oldest of the pair, Carter explained as the girl standing beside him nodded along with what he’d been saying. “Where’s everyone else?” Jenny questioned still holding onto the three young children, “Fiona, Eric and Mollie are inside trying to clear up the mess before Sister Brenda, Sister Diana, Sister Evangelina and Sister Kathrine get back from their two day silence pledge” Alice answered before Carter butted in “and Alexander, Marcus and Spencer are still at school, their practising their music for the Christmas production remember”.

With everyone accounted for at whatever location they were at, Jenny then lead the way with the three smallest behind her whilst Carter and Alice flanked her as they cautiously entered the building heading towards the room in question. Stopping in the corridor they were soon joined by the three children who’d finished clearing away the broken glass.

“Jenny what do we do?” Eric questioned soon hoisting one of the youngest on to his hip. “I’m not sure but I do know one thing I’m gonna need my tools..” she replied as Fiona and Louise disappeared up the near by set of stairs before reappearing with a tin box, “here Jenny, here” Louis exclaimed eyes lighting up as she watched the oldest of all the children open up the box pulling out an old looking trinket.

“But I thought you didn’t use it unless..” Mollie began to question before being shushed, “I’m not meant to besides it’s been so long I don’t even know whether it’ll still work” Jenny chuckled unsurly holding the sonic in her hand, flashes of her father using it crossed her mind as she set to work leaving the other children in the corridor entering the room allowing the sonic to take readings. After waiting a few moments for the information to register on the sonic, she flicked it up before checking what it was saying. “Well whatever was in there was not human, I’m not even sure it’s an animal” she muttered under her breath doing a sweep of the entire building until she was satisfied that whatever has been plaguing them for the last few weeks was gone.

“It’s safe,” she told them picking up Johnny the youngest boy who was clutching onto his toy rabbit, “whatever was here’s gone,” she explained before they all heard the voices of the last three children of the orphanage arrived back. “We’re back!” Spencer shouted from the doorway as the other two cane storming up the stairs, “what’s wrong.... you all look like you’ve seen a ghost” Alexander joked while his twin Alice moved to hit him on the head. “Ouch what was that for!” He hissed rubbing his head, “there was an incident, it scared the little ones” she growled glaring at him as Spencer and Marcus shrugged “well... get Jenny to do her weird make believe science she’s always yapping about”.

“Now watch it, Jennys the smartest girl I’ve met lay off her okay, since whilst you’ve all been galavanting off doing who knows what, she’s been trying to keep this place together do ya’ here me ay’” Carter defended her, stepping up in front of her protectively “besides things were serious... the youngesters could’ve been seriously hurt” he exclaimed staring down the 14 and 16 year olds.

Shaking their heads they all shared a look of amusement, “your all just a bunch of wining pathetic little babies, no wonder nobody wants you all” Spencer scoffed directing the other two back up to their rooms leaving everyone on the own once again. Anxious from all the silence Jenny quickly broke the silence best way she could trying to take all the attention off of what had happened, “Well how bout some supper” she smiled as the little ones became excited by the thought as they all tumbled down into the kitchen to begin helping the elder girl in making food for them all.

“Jenny will the thing come back?” Jamie asked as he sat on the side sturing the bowl of egg yolks the best he could.

“Probably? Who knows..” she replied giving him a small smile of reassurance, “but you’ll stop them right?” He asked naively eyes full of hope the same hope that had slowly began to fade from Jenny’s own eyes. “Of course I’ll always protect you lot” she grinned pinching his cheek endearingly.

Jenny’s POV:

I’d been struck by the cane six times by the time I’d gotten up to bed, two by my head teacher for talking out of tone and four from Sister Brenda for think unholy thoughts. All I was doing was telling the little ones about the Ood and what they were like when I met them all those years ago.

It had been two weeks since whatever had been scaring everyone was last seen. My ancient sonic screwdriver couldn’t get a reading on it and since my vortex manipulator was busted I could even go anywhere to get stuff to try and work out what it was. I was stratcging at my wall making another mark to signify another day passing by, another day since seeing my father, another day since the day I died. Everything on Earth moved slowly compared to how I had used to live, it was dull and uneventful nothing that happened to be powerful enough to get the Doctors attention from where ever he was in the universe.

Moving quickly to my spot by the window I say there counting the stars naming as many known constellation I could waiting out the hours for dawn to appear. After crossing off all the constellations I lived on to the known planets and all the moons trying to find something stimulate my brain.

Utter silence was deafening, I wanted for something to happen desperately and yet dread what could appear if my prayers where ever heard.

“Jenny”

“Jenny”

Tumbling to the floor as the voices got louder the same to that haunted me daily. The Doctor and Donna’s voices screaming in my head as begged and pleaded for it all to just stop. A dark sinister mass formed above me as if triumphant for defeating one of the last time lords.

Poor lost child. A time lord abandoned by her own kind. Nothing but loneliness. Nothing but fear and pain. You will always be alone Time Lord. ALWAYS. ALWAYS.

With tear soddened eyes, I wobbily stumbled to my feet glaring down the alien that was in my presence. Raising the sonic that I grasped tightly onto I hissed at the creature in front of me, “this planet.. these people... they are under my protection, whatever you are? Where ever you come from, leave now or else there will be consequences” I seethed turning the sonic on startling the creature as it bowled and screeched in spin before disappearing who knows where.

With my head spinning I crumpled to the floor the world around me being absorbed by darkness as the echoes of everyone inside the house crying and calling for help echoed in my mind as my final thought before passing out completely flashed by.

“Doctor please help me”

[tenroseforeverandever]

Dear Father Christmas... Chapter 18: December 24, 2033

MASTERPOST

Characters:  Tentoo; Rose Tyler; Jackie Tyler; Pete Tyler; Tony Tyler; OC Hope Tyler-Noble; OC Charlotte Tyler-Noble; OC Wilfred Tyler-Noble; OC Therin Thomson; Javic Thane

Rated: Teen

Tags: Family!Fic; Kid!Fic; Pete’s World; Letters to Santa; Christmas Fic; Family; Fluff; Hurt/Comfort; Angst; Romance; Love; gun violence; violence resulting in death; life-threatening injury; life threatening situations

Summary: When Rose Tyler was little, she always wrote a Christmas wish list to Father Christmas. As she grew older, the wish list became more of a letter to someone she could confide in once a year, but she fell out of the habit somewhere along the way. Now, as a new mum, celebrating her daughter’s first Christmas, Rose takes up writing her Christmas letter to Father Christmas once again.

Rose’s Christmas letters are excerpts from her life with her beloved Tentoo and their children in Pete’s World, written once a year, for each of 31 years.

Chapter Summary: When Rose receives a call telling her that Hope is unwell, she and the Doctor go to her rescue and run into a very familiar stranger.

Notes: @rose–nebula and mrsbertucci   are the absolute best. Thank-you, my darlings.

Thanks to @doctorroseprompts for their 31 Days of Ficmas prompts. The prompt I used today was Ice.

Also read at: AO3; FF.net; Teaspoon

December 24th, 2033

Dear Father Christmas,

It’s a funny little multiverse. After everything I’ve experienced throughout space and time, and in multiple universes, I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason (or at least that there are no coincidences.) I could chalk this up to being the natural consequence of the way the multiverse works or some sort of divine intervention. The Doctor would probably say it was something else entirely, and he’d be right.

I know for a fact that much of my life has not been a result of random chance. Intervention, yes, but not divine by any means. I created the words. I scattered them in time and space. I saw everything: all that is; all that was; all that ever could be. But I had no experience or skill, and I had the emotional intelligence of a nineteen year old London shop girl. I’d tweaked timelines here and there, an imperfect attempt to control my fate, the Doctor’s fate. Sporadically, the words still appear sometimes, and when they do, we can only hold on tight and ride out what Bad Wolf has in store for us.

Last week, my mobile rang while I was at work. I was teaching Integration 101 to a diverse group of newly settled aliens, doing some role play on basic greetings, body language, and personal space. It wasn’t going very well, especially the personal space portion. The classroom was full of irritated voices as the group came to terms with the fact that personal space meant something very different for each species and none of it was appropriate for human interaction.

I was frustrated to say the least, especially when the Glooboorg insisted on bouncing around the room (literally! Its body was very rounded and elastic and, well… bouncy. Friendly as they are, I’m not certain the human race is quite ready to meet the Glooboorgs, and perception filters can only filter out so much.)

Anyway, I was unable to reach my phone before it rang out, but it was just Hope. She didn’t leave a message, so I assumed she’d realized I was busy and she would try to reach me later. It wouldn’t be the first time. But then, just as I was turning back to call my class to order, she rang again. The group was noisy and boisterous and I could barely hear the voice on the other end of the line. But I could hear enough to know that it wasn’t Hope.

It was male.

It said: “Mrs. Tyler-Noble?” There was something familiar about the voice… the accent perhaps. I couldn’t put my finger on it. The din in the classroom was making it difficult to sort it out.

Anyway, I confirmed who I was, and asked him what the hell he was doing with my daughter’s mobile. My heart went into overdrive when he told me.

He said my daughter was unwell, but he was keeping her safe for the time being. He didn’t know where she lived, and she wasn’t in any condition to talk, and did I know her address so he could take her home.

I had so many questions. So many! But I couldn’t even think of what to ask. I turned to the class and told them to hush so I could hear, so I could think. I finally told the man I would be right there to take care of Hope myself.

“Sorry? What? How is that possible?” He seemed quite capable of coming up with great questions. He wasn’t panicking about his seventeen year old daughter, unconscious in the arms of a stranger, a thousand light years and three times that in temporal years away. “I should tell you my name and where we are, at least, don’t you think?”

I couldn’t argue with that, though I could easily trace her mobile and have the TARDIS lock onto her coordinates. Still, even as frightened as I was, I had the sense to know it would be best not to materialize the TARDIS in too public a spot.

He told me his name, but I barely caught it in the uproar caused by the Glooboorg knocking over one of the other students. It sounded something like “Derrek Shane”. He confirmed he was on Edifinol Beta, and in the city where Hope was studying. I could hardly hear him, to be honest. But all the maddening distractions faded into the background when he told me where in the city I’d find him.

“We’re just outside a club. It’s called The Bad Wolf.”

--ooOoo--

The Doctor was already waiting for me by the time I dismissed my class early for the day and gathered my things. He had the car running and we took off at high speed. It took a frustratingly long time to get home, and we decided we would “time it”, and program the TARDIS to land a minute or so after my conversation with the stranger (Derrek someone-or-other) had ended.

We landed in an alley about a block away from the club, the TARDIS materializing as our favourite (and somewhat reassuring) blue Police Public Call Box. It was night, but the streets in the area were well lit and designed primarily for foot traffic, so although it was busy, it was quite easy to find the club. But even if it hadn’t been visible, honestly, the waves of music throbbing from it would have given it away.

There sitting on a public bench, slumped against a young man’s shoulder was Hope. I rushed toward her across the street, shouting her name. The Doctor was hot on my heels.

The young man looked up at me and I swear I nearly passed out from shock.

“Hey,” he said. “You weren’t kidding about getting here fast! Pretty impressive. I’d like to get my hands on that kind of technology. I mean Hope’s told me about how she comes from a very distant colony. To get here that quickly...”

“Jack?” The only word that came out of my mouth, because that’s who it was, sitting right in front of me with his arm around my daughter… Jack Bloody Harkness. But so young, maybe in his mid-twenties

“Nope, sorry, you must be mistaking me for someone else. Javic Thane’s the name.” He held out his hand to me, and stunned, I extended my hand to him. He brought it to his lips and kissed my knuckles. “Well, I can certainly see where your daughter comes by her good looks.”

Despite my overwhelming worry for Hope, I found something comforting in the familiarity of his audacious come-ons, and cheesy pick-up lines, so much like the man I once knew.

The Doctor growled. “You can just stop flirting with my wife, right now.”

I raised an eyebrow at Jack… sorry, no… Javic, and sat on the other side of Hope. I pulled her against me, relief flooding through me to have her in my arms.

“I was just saying hello.” (Of course he would answer with that!)

“For you, that’s flirting. And if I find you’ve been trying to pull my daughter…”

“Whoa! Wait a minute, Mr. Tyler-Noble−”

Blimey, the Doctor hated that title. “No, don’t call me that. I’m the Doctor.”

“Doctor Tyler-Noble?”

“No, just the Doctor.”

Jack… Javic seemed skeptical about the name but he ploughed on with his story. “All right… Doc, (do you mind if I call you Doc?) listen I do admit, when your daughter first walked into the club, I was attracted to her. I mean, who wouldn’t be. She’s… well, she’s beautiful.” He hurried on with his story when the Doctor growled again. Apparently when he’d spoken to Hope, he’d realized how young she was and had immediately stopped trying to pull her. She’d seemed a little out of her element and he was trying to be nice. He’d bought her a drink (non-alcoholic at her request); something he described as a Virgin Ginger Cream Schnapps, a drink popular for kicking off the Festivitide season. They had talked for a bit while she sipped her drink and then, her confidence bolstered, she’d run off to join her friends.

The Doctor, of course, accused him of spiking her drink with something.

“First, that’s illegal, and while I’m not above a having little fun at the expense of the authorities, I could never do that to another person. That’s not fun. It’s just wrong. And second, why the hell would I spike her drink and then call you up to come get her? Your logic’s flawed, Doc.”

I confirmed Javic’s story. I’d run a quick scan of Hope with my sonic: she was drunk, but there were no other drugs in her system. I asked him if he knew how she got drunk, since it seemed she’d been planning to stick with virgin drinks.

“Well, you understand, it’s not like I was stalking her or anything, but there was something about her… Look Doc, I told you, it was nothing like that. I just felt like… I needed to protect her, and believe me, it sounds as unlikely to me as it does to you.”

He said she’d gone off with her friends, and then he told us about Alko-Ice, a new product that was making the rounds in clubs. Apparently, the molecular structure of alcohol was modified so it could be frozen at temperatures just below the freezing point of water. The kids played a game with it, a race to see who could melt the most ice chips on their tongue in the least amount of time.

“But, seriously,” he said, “there’s not much alcohol in them. The kids just like the nifty flavours and colours they come in.” He went on to explain that Hope hadn’t really looked as though she’d wanted to play, but her friends had been pretty pushy about it. Javic had even been about to intervene, but she’d already started. “Doc, she didn’t even play for that long. She couldn’t; could barely even stand after the first few minutes.”

True enough. I noticed there was actually hardly any alcohol in her system, certainly not enough to account for her current state, and while she was clearly very intoxicated, none of my scans indicated she was in any immediate danger.

After I nudged him over our bond, the Doctor grudgingly thanked Javic for looking after Hope. He extended his hand for a handshake, but in true “Jack” style, Javic brought the Doctor’s hand to his lips the way he’d done mine. “Well, it’s been a slice.” He made to walk away, back inside the club, but he turned to us before he slipped in. “Hey, if you two are ever up for a ménage à trois… It could be fun. I don’t like to boast, but I’m not just another pretty face…” He ran a long, lingering look over the Doctor’s slim body, which earned him another impatient growl. “All right, all right, I’m going!”

I called good-bye and thank-you to him, and he waved cheekily as he turned to the bouncer at the door of the club and immediately tried to pull him. I don’t care what the hell he called himself… that was Jack Harkness.

--ooOoo--

Back in the safety of the TARDIS, the Doctor did a proper scan of Hope. It seems she’s inherited the Time Lord sensitivity to ginger. Even a smidge of it will render a Time Lord susceptible to the effects of alcohol. In short, despite superior physiology, they can get thoroughly plastered (as I have been lucky enough to witness on at least one occasion.) Poor Hope, with otherwise mostly human physiology, and having consumed a large amount of ginger in the “ginger cream schnapps”, was probably completely pissed before she’d barely swallowed more than three of those Alko-Ice chips.

The Doctor administered something to counteract the effects of the ginger, so her body could process the alcohol properly. He waited impatiently for her to wake up, pacing, and projecting his anger and disappointment over our bond. I tried to get him to calm down, but he wasn’t having any of it. Eventually he left the infirmary, probably off to fiddle with bits of the TARDIS, keeping himself busy while he waited.

Hope finally opened her eyes blearily (the Doctor told me she would likely have one hell of a hangover), and looked around her, confused. I stroked her hair, projecting my love to her.

“Mama?” Oh my heart! She hadn’t called me that since she was about three or four. I just kept sending her my love, and I explained to her what had happened. She was frightened and so very sorry to have made us worry. She and her friends had gone out to celebrate the end of their first term. She’d never planned to drink or even try those ice chips. Her friends had been so insistent, she figured she’d just have one or two to appease them, and then back out, but she’d started feeling so faint…

That’s when the Doctor decided to bluster in like the Oncoming bloody Storm. Honestly, I’ve never seen such a rant. It started off with “You, little madam…” and ended a long while later with some nonsense about her coming home with us and never coming back to “…this blasted Slytheen’s arse of a planet.” Hope was beside herself, sobbing and pleading with him to reconsider, but he’d stomped off, ignoring any of my attempts to mentally calm him. A few seconds later, I felt the TARDIS’ flight sequence activate. Apparently, we were heading home.

I told Hope to give him time, and suggested she should just come and spend Christmas with us, but she was hysterical. She couldn’t miss classes. The new term was beginning in two days, and Christmas was still a week away…

“We have a time machine, Hopie,” I reminded her. “I imagine we can break our rules, just this once, and time it for you.” We’d already timed it to come to get her tonight, but I wasn’t about to tell her that! “Your Dad’s going to need to cool off, yeah, but he’ll come around.”

--ooOoo--

The Doctor had been scared. I get that. But it was only this morning, a full week later, he finally admitted he “might have overreacted”.

I’d been after him all week to ease up a bit. I made the mistake of telling him that when I was even younger than Hope, I’d gone to clubs nearly every weekend, and frequently come home pissed. I think I just made things worse. He lost it… again. Said he didn’t need me to tell him that. He knew. After he’d lost me to this universe, he admitted he’d go back in time to watch over me and make sure I was safe. He said he’d bumped into Jack a few times, too, doing the same.

I didn’t know whether to feel angry or grateful toward the two idiots. It was all they could do, I suppose, protecting a younger me from the world. In the end, I just felt loved, by the older brother I always wished I’d had, and the man I wanted to spend forever with.

But it wasn’t lost on me, the similarity between Jack watching over me and Javic looking out for Hope, and it made me think. I still couldn’t figure out what had rattled the Doctor more: the idea of Hope going to a club, or the appearance of Bad Wolf and our not-so-coincidental meeting of Jack’s parallel counterpart. I’m guessing probably the combination of both.

I know he wasn’t impressed with my teenaged self’s frequent drunkenness, at least not now that we have children of our own. The idea of Hope going to a club and possibly behaving like that must have been eating away at him, but I eventually managed to assure him that Hope was nothing like me, at least in this. She’s much more level-headed than I ever was. (I decided to keep my thoughts about Charlie to myself; she was very much more like me… but the Doctor didn’t need to be worrying about that just now!)

As for Javic, what worried the Doctor most about him, I think, was that this was someone whose parallel self, had been a swindler and a con man before we crossed paths with him, not to mention a pan-sexual lothario. But I think I managed to convince him on this too. Javic’s past may have been very different from Jack’s, and I firmly believe, in spite of him being a fraud, Jack had been a good and loyal person who just got off on the wrong track for a while. Having us in his life had changed that. Maybe Hope’s presence would affect Javic. He had certainly put his lothario status aside to protect her, a brotherly act, very similar to how Jack always used to treat me once he realized how much me and the Doctor loved one another, though it took us forever to realize it ourselves.

Apparently, I had managed to get through to the Doctor, ‘cause I came down to the kitchen this morning to find Hope and him making banana pancakes together, and sharing a huge, warm hug. So, needless to say, Hope is spending Christmas with us, and the next morning she’ll be returning to Uni on Edifinol Beta, and we will be timing it to make sure she doesn’t miss any classes.

And as for Javic Thane, if I as Bad Wolf, had seen fit to ensure our paths crossed, I couldn’t believe it was just a passing fancy. He had stumbled across our family for a reason. This wouldn’t be the last time we’d see him, I was sure of it. We would all just have to hold on tight and ride out whatever Bad Wolf had in store for us.

Thanks for listening, Santa. I hope you are lucky enough to come across old friends in your travels, this year. My love to all,

Rose

[theparaminds]

We all remember moments entwined with difficulty and sadness, moments we stand unsure of our next step and the right choices. Yet, through those times we also remember the music and the art that fills the cracks in our happiness, the art that allowed us to live and breath, even through the confusion. Xavley knows this all too well, he knows what it means to be hurt and healed through art. And now, he is putting his heart towards doing the same for others.

Ever since the release of project ‘oof’, Xavley has finally found himself clearing the daily fog that filled his creative energy, instead producing lush and breathtakingly emotional music that resonates with any soul, whether it be young or old, tired or excited. His combination of genre and connective lyricism guides his music to a plateau of beauty every artist strives towards, yet so few can achieve.

While this last year has been anything short of easy for Xavley, there remains the constant happiness and knowledge that all the hard work is not going to waste, that others are finding it to be the bright spots of their often dreary and disappointing days. And for that reason, Xavley has remained, and will continue to be, the beacon of hope, resilience and artistry for so many in need.

Our first question as always, how’s your day going and how are you?

Honestly, my day's been rough as fuck. This year's probably been one of the hardest of my young adult life,

but in terms of how it was objectively: it wasn't bad. My day started off good, I woke up on my own terms after a really weird ass dream and then I listened to this album called “Sen Am” by Duval Timothy. Mind if I ask how your day was?

Yeah my days been great! Thank you so much for asking. Would you be cool telling about the dream you had and what’s been going on for you  the last year?

I forget how some of the parts fit together, but as a general overview: my friend’s sister married the prince of England. After that, Usher threw a beach party to celebrate with a bunch of tiny little micro plastic bead things that were supposed to inflate into beach balls when they hit the water, but instead they just absorbed all the heat in the ocean and caught fire. A lot of people got hurt and it caused an environmental crisis. When we caught him (Usher), he broke out into this weird live performance of a very sexual video to evade capture. Then we were at a party where my uncle and his friends were wearing shirts saying “company boss” and “the new guy” while my aunt was giving me life advice. At one point she transformed into a middle aged woman who said something racist when I mentioned going to Ghana.

And to sum the year up super quickly, I had a friend who was doing a bunch of things that made me feel hella uncomfortable while I was living with him, so after trying to ghost him while I was still living there, dumb I know, I ended up having to formally end our friendship. After that, he did his best to make the living situation pretty uncomfortable for everyone living there by giving me the silent treatment and opening up to our other roommates and then the other three people ended up kicking me out. Since then, I've had to couch surf for like a month, they aren't giving me my deposit back, and I've really struggled to get a grip on school stuff

Damn, that’s brutal, have you at least been able to find comfort through music and art  as escapism and a personal release?

I'm not sure. I'd say yes because I do A TON of music stuff when I'm procrastinating on my other responsibilities, like work or school. Music is a relief when I can actually make a good song, but if not, it presents a different kinda stress. The act of finishing a song is pretty relieving, but sometimes making them is also stressful. Listening to good music by other people is a good coping mechanism though some songs help me think back to nice memories, others kinda help me reframe how I'm looking at the situations I find myself in. I guess part of why my day started off so nice was because spotify gave me a good ass discover weekly playlist.

Have you had a good memory from the last difficult year that sticks out to you? Something that distracted from the hardships and down times?

I've had so many good times this year. Yesterday, my friend and I were at the library and this girl working at the desk snorted and that shit was SO FUNNY because she definitely didn't want to snort. We weren't trying to laugh at her because it really could've happened to any of us. I guess it was just a laugh we both needed. Every show I've played has been a blast; I usually really like meeting and interacting with new people and those places have presented some cool opportunities to meet and reconnect with people. One of my closest friends let me stay at her house for a minute while I was tryna get my life together and there were a lot of fun times then. I guess something that distracts me is knowing that I don't know what tomorrow's gonna be like. That's kinda reassuring.

How would you say you’ve found yourself as an artist through this time, wether through soundcloud, live shows or just generally making music? In a sense, how has your musical vision developed?

I'm actually not entirely sure how to answer that one. I guess what comes to mind first is how I've developed as a person. I still really need to work at being more collaborative. Hearing what other people have to say and how they say it in their art has really touched and inspired me to be a better artist. I like to surround myself with people who inspire me to be a better person and to be a better me. I think finding myself as an artist is kind of an everyday thing because who I am as a person and who I am as an artist are one in the same. In my art, I try to say and be some of the things I am and stand for. Sonically, I feel like I could produce about anything, but I'm not really sure why I like making music in the genre that I do. I guess it just feels like it's the most me if that answers the question When I go back and listen to my old stuff I can hear who I was and what I cared about. I like hearing myself mature but I also wish the old stuff was just as good as what I have now. But if it were just as good, then there'd be no point in growth.

Would you personally say you have a certain type of person or listener you hope to resonate with? Possibly someone who may have felt or is going through situations and emotions similar to yours?

Honestly, whenever people reach out to me to tell me how my music has impacted them it's so so incredibly surprising. Maybe it shouldn't be because we're all people and people go through shit, but it is. This one time someone told me that my music helped them stop self harming and I was like, "damn. that's what I needed x amount of years ago". So it's nice to know that my stuff is sometimes able to provide for others what I struggle to provide myself. I guess one thing that's really influenced the progression of my sound is how I grew up around a lot of white people and, up until now, I never really felt "Black enough" or good enough in any regard, so I've always hoped that what I say and how I say it resonates with those who look like and experience the world in a way that might be even the slightest bit similar to the way I do. Of course, I believe that a lot of music is for everyone, and I would definitely encourage anyone to listen to and feel with my music, but I would love for it to resonate with the Black people just trying to do the day-to-day.

Absolutely, that's essential in music. When you personally were becominging interested in music and art, who were the musicians who did the same for you and your emotions?

Oh boy. There’s so so many, the artists that first come to mind are: Isaiah Rashad, Ravyn Lenae, Steve Lacy for sure, MoRuf, Lo-fi Le-vi, Daywave, Lauryn Hill, Noname, Wild nothing, Abra, Thundercat, Willow Smith, Beach fossils, Bibio, Shlomo, King Krule, Yeek, Brent Faiyaz, TORO Y MOI!, Childish Gambino for sure, Redline Graffiti, Princess Nokia, TOM MISCH, Little Dragon, OutKast, Alicia Keys and Michael Jackson.I guess the people I’ve done my best to imitate would be Joji, Ravyn Lenae, Brent Faiyaz, Lauryn Hill, Noname, Chance, Gambino, Earth Wind and Fire and Washed Out. Every artist I’ve ever liked has had a profound impact on me. But I think some of my friends have had the largest impact. My friend who makes music under the name Nicole Watson has had a massive influence over how I write and how I sing. I definitely wouldn’t be where I am without her. Aside from her, my friend Joseph who goes by TEMPOREX, and then my old step-brother named Jay who makes music under the nam “Dream-Like”.  I’ve been a part of a few artist group chats that’ve really encouraged me. One specific one that comes to mind was created by this guy named Marcus who brought us all together as a fanclub group for The Internet band. The people I can name from that off the top of my head are Aidan Ochre (he makes music under that name), this producer named Walt, this dude named Deon, and a few other guys. My friend who makes music under the name Oliv Blu has also been a pretty big source of inspiration for me.

When you see the paths these inspirations of yours take, the improvements and new sounds they explore, what paths do you begin to hope to go down and what are musical avenues you hope to explore later?

I guess I hope to go down the paths I don’t yet know yet. I don’t think I’ll ever  want to completely transform into some other musician. I personally think borrowing and adopting aspects of another’s work is park of being an artist, but to completely adopt their sound, style, subject matter or whatever would be a disservice to myself. I have stuff to say and if I’m not saying it as myself then I feel like that’ll just retract from the value of what I personally think and feel. I guess in the end I just want to like where I’m going as an artist. And if we’re talking  musical avenues... I’d say the unreleased stuff I’m holding onto is deeper in the Rnb/Soul genre. I think, in a way, when I first started making music was when it was at its best. I’ve really been trying to get back to that raw sound because Oof really felt like I was trying to conform to a mold that other “bigger” artists have already laid out. To get there I’d love to be able to combine the rnb with some of the more jazzy influences and  little bit of shoegaze/chillwave or something.. I think it’d be pretty dope to keep some of the lo-fi attributes in there too.

How did you find yourself approaching the avenues of releasing ‘oof’, and what did that project represent as a whole for you?

With Oof I was revisiting a lot of old soundcloud demos I put out like 2+ years ago and cleaning them up a bit. I actually don’t remember if I had any intention with that one outside of trying to gain some traction in my music career. The goal was at least to to do better than I did on Ghost on the Run, but there wasn’t a whole lot of intention behind Oof as a project. Most of the songs are either me processing depression/anxiety stuff or other shit from my silly love life. In the end, all the songs just ended up sounding like they’d work together. I tried to put them in an order that “made sense”. Every time I’ve finished a project I look back at it and think “that doesn’t really feel like me.” but this upcoming EP/Album I have titled “with love,” feels a little closer to what I sounded like when I first started making music. I like that a lot. So to go back, Oof was a period of growth. What’s funny is that I go through the same exact emotional process whenever I release an album and then a couple months down the road I look back and I’m like “eh.” and then a few more months follow and again I look back and listen for where and how I can improve.

I feel like art and learning in general is about learning to experience, in whatever way one does, the space between the skills they’ve gained. Like if someone gets a trophy for every drum pattern, each vocal run, or every piano/guitar chord they know, then eventually they’re gonna step back and be like “damn, I have all these trophies and there isn’t much space left for any more”. But if they look closer they’ll find that the gaps between their trophies are bigger than they thought. There’s always space for more. Sometimes it’s just really fuckin hard to see those spaces, especially if you’re doing the same shit over and over.

When you look back upon that project and the work you're currently doing, what have you found the biggest differences to be and do you find yourself prideful of oof and those past works?

If we’re talking technicalities, I feel like I do a better job with my vocal runs and general layering stuff. I also feel like I’ve become a better lyricist and I feel like I’ve let go of the structure that I used to embrace. I’m proud that I was able to complete them (the albums) because I have ADHD so finishing shit can be really hard for me. It’s nice to see that I am capable of finishing projects when I really put my mind to it. The developments between each one are some things to be proud of.

What would you say is your biggest goal going forward and what are you going to do to ensure it becomes completed?

Honestly man, I just wanna be happy. I don't really care whether I blow up or not, I just want to keep making stuff that helps me feel good about myself because I've been pretty damn unhappy for a long time and I feel like it's about damn time that turns around. I want to produce films and write poems and somehow incorporate all of my arts into one final project one day, like a masterpiece of some kind. That'd be pretty dope to see.

Moses Sumney once signed a dollar and gave it to me after a show when he had like 4k followers on IG and I am DETERMINED to meet him at some music award show and give it back to him. That's when I think I'll be like "yep. I'm good.” I don’t even know why,  I don't even really care about giving it back to him that much. But I've been holding onto that thought since I was a junior in high school and I gotta bring it to fruition. I also want to be able to make other people happy. I'm doing my best to do that now, but I don't have a whole lot of resources to help people like I want to. I definitely contribute to efforts when, where, and however I can; but it'd be pretty damn tight to have the mobility to do it on a larger scale. At the same time, I think it just matters that I do what I can whenever I can for whoever needs it. I'm still trying to think that one through. I want to help my family be happy and I want to help kids get access to the arts they wanna practice. I would also love to help them learn how to practice those arts, if they fall under the pretty wide variety of things i'm learning to do,if not, I'd love to help them find people who can help them. And I guess by doing that I'd be paying respect to the people who've helped get me to where I am today. Like a pay it forward kinda thing.

I love your story about Moses, I’m sure you’ll get it one day. Maybe as a final question, and it may be really loaded for you. But, what is the point to this difficult journey you’ve undertaken? Why is it you have poured your heart and soul into this all? Why, for you, is it all worth it?

The most difficult journey for me has been learning that I'm worthy of being heard and loved and understood. I'm still working at it, but I've been trying to recognize that what I say and how I say it has value as a contribution to the greater human to non human life to earth to universe conversation. It's kind of hard to think about sometimes but I know that because I even have the opportunity to be alive with the resources and people I have around me, I have to do something with it all. I am choosing to have the responsibility of making something of everything that's been given to me so I can give it to others and then, I hope, they'll do something with what they have and pass it on to someone else in whatever capacity they're able to give. I guess another thing that's been incredibly frustrating for me has been watching all of my friends do really well with their music while the progression of my "career" has been super slow. It's taught me how to be happy for others and how to separate my success from theirs, but that's been a little frustrating. In the end, if it doesn't work out I'll probably keep doing music but it'll just be a hobby. I'll pick up something else and try that.

That’s a perfect way to look at it and visualize what the purpose is. Do you have anyone to shoutout or anything to promote? The floor is yours!

Yeah! I'm dropping a single this Friday, November 23! Also follow me on instagram @xavley and comment a Never Gonna Give You Up reference one of @TEMPOREX’s instagram posts and tell him Xavier sent you. Also go listen to Dream-Like because he's been dropping a lot of hot tunes lately.

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Photos by Colin Shephed, Ben Ward, and Travvis Redding