#and dont worry there will be non toxic healthy relationship ones

[devinescribe]

Burnt Out

Bitches... (1, I love you all very much. 2, .... read 1) it's time for some angst...

And the start of me making poly relationship things-

Request away lol (I'm working on a request and small project chapters :) )

Warnings: Toxic Relationship, mentions scars, burns, Manga spoilers, swearing, emotionally abusive behavior, mentally abusive behavior, gaslighting(?) Let me know if I missed any!

You giggled as both men chased after you through the halls of the hotel. "(Y/N), you're wearing socks! You're going to- shit!" Niragi yelled after you, cursing when he saw you fall. You slipped down the stairs. You landed with a thud at the bottom. Tears filled your eyes at the pain, but you swallowed them back, standing up. You yelped, falling back to the floor. Chishiya stared down at you, kneeling besides you,  squeezing your leg. "Ow! Shi-Shi, hurts," you whined, slapping his hand away. He glared up at you. "Maybe don't be stupid next time. I'm just trying to help you," he scoffed, going back to trying to find out what was wrong. "You don't have to be so mean to he-" "Shut up. You're dumber than her, you're the whole reason this happened anyways." He felt people stare, and stopped. "Take her back up to our room. I'll figure out what's wrong there," Chishiya stated, getting up, and walking away. You expected Niragi to yell after him, or repremand him for something, but we're met by silence. "Gi-Gi, you ok?" You whispered as he picked you up softly. He pressed a quick kiss to your forehead nodding.

"Niragi... this isn't the way back to our room," you said, noticing he was taking you the opposite way. "Clever girl," he praised with a smile. You laughed at his words. "I'm taking you to Ann. She has more equipment to help you. I'll get Chishiya after I take you to her though," he explained. You nodded.

_______________________________________

"And then it was like bam, then woosh, and like... wow!!" You exclaimed, trying to find the words to explain your game. Niragi laughed, patting the top of your head. "Sounds fun sweetheart. Tell me all about it after I take a shower," he said. You nodded with a smile, sitting on the edge of your bed. Chishiya had been on the bed, listening to your rambling. "Chishiya, I think it was really cool how you tried to-" you started. "Gods you're loud. Quiet down. And I know. I'm clever, after all. Neither of you would be here without me. Probably dead," he lectured. "But Chishiya, Niragi and I survived without you before we came to the Beach, remember? We were t-" you started, confused at his words. "I get it, he's your favorite out of us both! You make it so fucking obvious. I bet the only reason you wanted both of us is because you're an attention whore who needs multiple men to use her to feel good about herself. Shut up and let me sleep," he shouted. Tears filled your eyes as he turned away from you. Had you really shown favoritism? You didn't try to, if you had. You always made sure you tried to do things with both. Was he feeling left out? Is that why he was being a jerk?

Those were all thoughts running through your mind, not knowing that you weren't the problem. You had spent equal time with both, giving them equal attention. Chishiya just never wanted you around him.

_______________________________________

"(Y/N), come with me. Now," Chishiya ordered. Ten of Hearts. That was tonight's game. And you were terrified. He had pulled you away before anything got to out of hand. You thought that maybe he was trying to be nice. Maybe he had finally come around? Had you given him enough attention? "W-where's Niragi?" You asked, jogging to catch up with him. "Don't worry about him let's go."

You followed him around the whole time, watching as his hands quickly grabbed items. ''What are you making?" You asked, hoping he didn't snap at you. You feared his response. "Something to beat the game with. If you can't bring the witch to the fire, bring the fire to the witch," he said. You sighed in relief. He didn't yell at you, and you were happy about it. "Ok... so... you know who the witch is?" You questioned. "I have a hunch. Now stop asking questions," he stated. "So annoying..." you heard him mutter. You frowned, keeping your lips shut.

Following him up the stairs, you kept to yourself. You knew he wouldn't care about your thoughts. He might yell at you, or call you annoying. You didn't want to make him angry... He was just trying to protect you, right?

"Niragi!" You shouted happily, seeing he was at the rooftop. He wasn't dead. He looked over at you with a smirk. "Ah, so he did keep you safe. Where were you hiding?" He asked, picking up his gun from the floor. "There's many places for me to hide," Chishiya responded. You tried walking towards Niragi, but Chishiya grabbed your sleeve. You tugged at his hand, trying to get away. "Let me go," you said, struggling against him. "No."

The next few minutes went in a blur. All you remember was Chishiya and Niragi arguing a bit back and forth. You were so overwhelmed already, the game getting to you, and now your lovers were fighting. Cards flying, fire, screaming. You couldn't tell if it was your own scream or Niragi's, but it didn't matter.

"C-chishiya what the hell?! W-what?!" You yelled, shaking, stepping back from him. "Hmm... guess he wasn't the witch then,'' he stated, dropping the homemade flamethrower to the ground. He started picking up the cards on the floor. You however tried taking deep breaths, trying to calm yourself. You couldn't. Tears slipped off your face, hands scratching you your arms. You couldn't scream, couldn't talk, couldn't move. It was like you were living in a nightmare.

_______________________________________

There was more instances, of course, but you were so done with everything. Niragi was still alive, to your relief. After all that, he was alive. And that's all that mattered to you. Chishiya had been with you, and still was. Understandably, you were scared of him. Niragi was angry at him, but couldn't do anything about it.

"Look, just tell me I'm right, and we're fine," Chishiya stated bored of the conversation. Both you and Niragi were so tired of this. The constant fighting, gaslighting, and hateful words. Chishiya was just too prideful to admit he was wrong.

It was a relationship between you three. You and Niragi shouldn't be putting in all the work, while he didn't try. At the begin he had. He had tried to be a part of the relationship, giving you both kisses and hugs. Random bouts of energy at 3 am to go to a random room. It had all started slowly going down hill. He pushed you both away, but didn't want to leave. He never left, giving you hope that maybe he really loved you both, and just didn't know how to express it. He had told you about his parents, and you just always tried to excuse his behavior as his trauma, but it just got to a point where you couldn't anymore.

"You're right," you started. You saw him smirk, and continued. "We couldn't fix you," you said. Suddenly he wasn't so sure of where this was going. "You're right, we shouldn't have tried to. Your pride is what you're concerned about?" Niragi said. He was tired of dealing with this as well. All he wanted was to find someone who actually cared about him, and who showed it. He didn't want to be with someone who made him feel alone. You didn't make him feel alone... "I'm still right, he wo-" Chishiya started, getting ready to argue back and forth with you two until you finally gave into him. But that wasn't going to happen today.

"Is "you're right" really all you wanna hear right now?" You whimpered, sitting on your knees next to Niragi.

"Well, you're right, we should've walked away faster... should've know You would only break our hearts after we were already in love," You whispered. You were all hurt. Niragi had severe burns, and bullet wounds, Chishiya had bullet wounds as well. You had burns on your arms and legs, cuts and bruises adorned your (s/c) skin. Most of which Chishiya had caused when he put you in danger at games for his own gain. Or when he needed to test one of the weapons he made, you were his test subject. "Yeah, I guess I'm just not good enough for either of you then. All you two do is act scared of me like I'm the bad guy-"

"You're right, you aren't good enough," Niragi stated angrily, caughing up blood after. He winced in pain at the sudden movement. You felt tears fill your eyes, and shook them away. ''I kissed your scars even after you hurt me, and he held your hand, even when you fucking burned him-" you shouted angrily. "Do you know how embarrassing that was?" Niragi whispered, his voice hoarse and raspy.

"Oh, because it's all my fault?"

"Yeah! That's exactly what we're saying! When was the last time you actually tried acting like you liked us?"

''She's right. You agreed to be with us. This is just fucking embarrassing to be with somebody who hates us, and doesn't even try to hide it."

"I don't hate you two I-"

"Liar."

"We hoped things got better, we hoped that love could turn a monster into a man," you stated, getting angrier by him trying to defend himself. "But it doesn't and it won't

Because you're beyond repair

But there is still someone for her somewhere, who will treat her so nice, you'll wish that you did-" Niragi retorted to his words. He didn't hate you both? He sure did a horrible job at showing it. Niragi knew he would die with his injuries. You would live. You could find someone who would treat you better than either of them could. "For someone so smart you're so fucking stupid to think that we're really that dumb..." you interrupted Niragi. He was losing energy, and anytime he coughed you could tell it was so painful to him. "We love you, but we're done... Pretending this was gonna work... Pretending loving you didn't hurt... Pretending that it doesn't burn when you think you're always right..." Niragi ended. Those words were hard for him to say, and hard for you to realize. You three had just been pretending this was going to work after Chishiya started pushing you two away. You two tried so hard to stay with him, and tried so hard to fit all three of you together, that you didn't realize how much staying fucking hurt.

" 'Cause you're still stuck on your past...You hate him so much but you're just like your dad!!" You screamed, shouting the first thing that came to mind. It hurt him. That was a first. The first time someone's words hurt him. And you, (Y/N), his sweet (Y/N), said them. You could see the shock written all over his face when you said them, and it made you feel a bit bad. Niragi was secretly proud of you, but focused on the situation at hand. Tears feel from your eyes, and you cursed yourself. "(Y/N), I- I'm- I can't... I-" Chishiya stammered. For once, he was at a loss for words. You and Niragi had made him happy. He didn't feel alone with you two, and that scared him. So he tried to push you both away, scared of hurting either of you, but I'm the end, he hurt you more than he meant to. He tried, he really tried at the beginning, the feeling of being together with you two bringing him the feeling of love, understanding, and happiness he'd never felt. But he ruined that. He hurt himself in this instance, he hurt the people he loved, making them scared of him. He realized you were right. He was turning out to be just like his father. He didn't want that. He wanted to wake up, this was surely a nightmare. He would wake up and you would be squished in between him and Niragi. You would be playing with his hair, talking about your dream. You wouldn't be scared of him, and you would all be back at the beach. Like the 10 of hearts never happened. But he knew that was wishful thinking. This was real, and this was happening. Everything he used to laugh about people worrying about was happening to him right now. This was his karma. It had finally caught up to him.

"And I know, that you tried...Gave it all that you had," you whispered through tears. No. He couldn't let the one thing that made him happy slip through his fingers. But... he had to let you go. You wanted to leave. Niragi wanted to leave. It would be cruel to both of you to make you stay. So he stayed quiet. Did you really think he tried? That made him feel a tiny bit better. You thought he tried. That he tried to make things work. "And being a monster doesn't necessarily make you bad..." Niragi added quietly. He was a monster. The words he had said to not only you, but Niragi could back that up. Not just his words either. His actions. He was a horrible person to both of you. Why did he expect both of you to stay with him, when neither of you had anymore energy to put into the relationship.

"But...even if we could staple it back together now... we all know that you can't light a fire that's already burnt out," Chishiya whispered. You both looked up, shocked he was agreeing with you. Was he crying? Neither you nor Niragi had ever seen him cry. Niragi chuckled a bit, not at the fact that Chishiya was crying, but at the fact that this was what it took for him to care. "Fuck... it hurts," Chishiya muttered with a laugh. "My injuries hurt less than losing both of you... fuck... I-"

He was interrupted by a voice. The games were over. "Oh my gods... we can go home! I reject citizenship in the borderlands," you said. "Same. I don't want to stay here. Fuck that," Niragi stated. "I also reject citezenship of the borderlands. This is like a personal hell..." Chishiya muttered. A bright light obstructed your vision.

You walked on crutches into their hospital room with a smile. " 'M back!" You chirped. You had all been in an accident, as a lot of people that were currently in the hospital were. You didn't know why, but the seemed so familiar. You liked being around them, and constantly visited them. "Ah, finally a pleasant noise to hear," the blonde man complemented. You could hear the teasing tone directed towards the other man in the room. "I can't really help it can I? So... shaddup..." the other muttered. "My nurse told me... that my heart stopped... for a minute," you mentioned, sitting in a chair in between their beds careful to not hurt your legs more. They had burns and scars, nothing tho serious. "What a coincidence. Us too," Chishiya said. You nodded, humming in acknowledgement. "I um... I also... get released tomorrow..." you said sadly. "That's great (Y/N). You can head back to your home," Niragi said. You shook your head. "I wanna stay. I don't know why, but you two seem familiar to me. And... I want to know why... it feels like...I don't know how to explain it..." you stated. "I... I've felt that as well," Chishiya admitted. "Ok, good I'm not crazy then," Niragi joked, coughing slightly after. "Well... how about I come visit everyday until you both get released... then we can figure out why? Or get to know each other more? It feels like... I've loved you in a past life kinda thing. Silly of me to say, huh?" You giggled. "I think... we'd both enjoy that... and it's not silly, in fact, we've both been talking about it, and that's how we feel. About you, and each other. It's quite weird, I've never met either of you in my life. You're both rather attractive though," Chishiya said. Niragi snickered and you looked over at Chishiya, who's eats had turned red.

"I said that outloud, didn't I?"

"Yep."

"It's a good thing I find both of you attractive too, blondie."

"Hey, I think you're both cute too! Lemme join in on this!"

"Of course. Join in on it (Y/N)."

I couldn't let you guys be sad, I'm sorry-

Also, I'm going on a trip to Arizona this week, so there will probably not be many (or any) updates. Sorry, but I do hope you enjoy this!

[alixanonymous]

How A Demon Commissions An Angel ~ A Daminette FanFic ~ Chapter 4: A Plan In Progress

From: DoWhatISay@email.com

To: Marinette.D.C.@email.com

Date: November 3, 2021 5:00 P.M.

Subject: I Accept Your Terms

Dear Ms. Dupain-Cheng,

I do not delude myself into thinking we will be able to magically solve each other’s problems but it does seem as though we both lack certain qualities the other does not. If you’re offering the chance for me to stay where I am, I would be a fool not to take it and I am not a fool. If I can also help fix your unfortunate situation, I will do so. 

Let me know where we go from here.

- Damian W.

From the phone of Marinette Dupain-Cheng:

The Ladyblog 

A Retraction Of An Earlier Article Nov 4 2021 

I’ve decided to take down an earlier article entitled “MDC Stole My Best Friend’s Designs!” following contact from the legal team of Jagged Stone. It was wrong of me to make accusations without proof and I will endeavor to provide evidence to back any claims I make on this blog in the future.

- Alya Cesaire, Creator of the Ladyblog

Chat Name: Aunt Penny

Aunt Penny: Are you sure you don’t want us to pursue any further action Marinette? That statement hardly seemed sincere and was not nearly sufficient considering all she’s claimed. We can help you know.

Me: It’s fine Aunt Penny. Anything else wouldn’t be worth the trouble. It’s not her fault anyway.

Aunt Penny: You know I don’t agree with that but okay, if you’re sure. Just remember the lawsuits have already been drafted.

Aunt Penny: By the way, Jagged’s suit was a real hit at the charity dinner. Not that we ever had a doubt. Have you been thinking about creating a new website?

Me: That’s great to hear. I’ll think about it, okay?

Aunt Penny: That’s good.

Chat Name: Alya

Alya: Girl, I know what you’re thinking but just because I had to post that statement doesn’t mean Lila’s lying. She just can’t release any proof because she wants to do the right thing and keep MDC’s identity a secret. She’s being the bigger person!

Me: She always is.

Alya: Don’t be like that! Please Marinette. Stop letting your jealousy cloud your judgement.

Chat Name: Uncle Jagged

Uncle Jagged: Pens told me that you dont want to sue i get it, lawsuits are totally not rock n’ roll but feeding that liar and her friends to fang is always an option!!!

Me: No, Uncle Jagged.

Uncle Jagged: fine…

Uncle Jagged: i got so much applause for your suit at the stuffy dinner btw.

Uncle Jagged: of course I told them all that my talented young niece made it.

Uncle Jagged: even had a billionaire’s son begging for a referral but dont worry i turned him down for you 

Me: What?! Why?!

Uncle Jagged: trust me, Mari, he was totally not rock n’ roll. not rock n’ roll at all! just rude

Chat Name: Adrien

Adrien: Hey Marinette, did you see the apology on the Ladyblog?

Me: You mean the retraction?

Adrien: Well, yes. 

Adrien: Look, Marinette, you’re not going to do anything else right? She took it down.

Me: She took it down because “she had no proof” not because she knows Lila lied. She’s still convinced even after Jagged’s legal team got involved although we both know the truth.

Adrien: I'm sorry.

Adrien: Even my father feels bad, he knows how much rumors like that could damage an artist’s reputation especially without proof.

Adrien: But he’s still convinced Lila’s someone I need to associate with and if you try to expose her again it’s going to be like every other time and I don’t want things to get worse for you.

Adrien: I’m sorry Mari.

Adrien: I just can’t help you while my father’s still on her side.

Google Search History: 

Gotham Charity Dinner 2021 Photos

Patricide but for uncles

What is it called when someone kills their uncle?

How to know if a friendship is toxic

From:Marinette.D.C.@email.com

To:DoWhatISay@email.com

Date:November 5, 2021  5:05 P.M.

Subject: The Plan

Hey Damian!

Sorry for the delay in responding. I don’t know if you saw but MDC had a bit of a problem to deal with yesterday. So here’s how I see it. Our plan has two parts: the commission for your brothers and then us trying to help each other out with our people problems.

For the commission: You already gave me the measurements which I’m trusting are up to standard since I’m not flying to America any time soon. Next I need to know exactly what you want me to make for each of your brothers: Grayson, Todd, and Drake, the measurements say are their names right? Then I need to know who you think wants a sweater and who wants a jacket and your ideas for the design. I’ll draw up some designs based on the information and send them to you for approval with an estimate of the cost. (Normally I’d also send a non-disclosure agreement beforehand too but considering how this all started I’m guessing you’re not going to give me your real name for the paperwork, are you?) After they’re approved I’ll need you to deposit half the sum in my account (Information attached) and I’ll use it to buy the materials.

If I can get all of this done in the next week or so, it should leave me about a month to finish the pieces before sending them out (An address will not be optional fyi). Sounds good??

For the other part of our plan: the way I could see it going is when one of us has a problem we could use the other person for sort of a different perspective. It’s like in those cartoons when the character has those two little people on their shoulders, do you know what I’m talking about? One’s good, the other’s bad and they’re both telling the person to do different things. Not that you’re bad I mean and not that I just assumed that of the two of us you’d be the bad one…  I’m not saying any of this right. I just mean it like I said before, I could learn a thing or time from someone who isn’t too concerned with pleasing everybody. (I didn’t mean that as an insult by the way. I actually find it kind of admirable.)

So, here’s an example of a situation I could use your opinion on: today I started to wonder if one of my friendships is no longer healthy anymore. I have this friend who is the only other person in our class that knows Lila’s lying. At first he convinced me that her lies weren’t hurting anybody and that as long as we both knew the truth then it didn’t matter what anybody else thought. Eventually, we both realized that that was no longer the case when she almost got me expelled, but by then she had convinced his father that I was a bad influence on him. So now he’s forced to play nice and keep her happy to please his father.

It’s hard because even though I know he knows she’s lying, he can’t tell anyone else so no one believes me when I try to tell them. Now she’s made good on her promise to turn everyone against me and so I have to deal with all her antics by myself while she stands by his side with the rest of the class. I know he’s in a bad position but it still doesn’t make me feel better when he texts me asking if I’m okay after  something happens while at the same time whenever we’re with other people, he keeps his distance so she doesn’t report him to his father.

I guess I’m just tired of trying to make him feel better all the time. However, whenever I think about ending our friendship, I feel guilty because it’s really not his fault. His father wouldn’t hesitate to pull him from school and then we couldn’t be friends anyway. I feel like a good friend would stick by his side. I don’t know. What do you think, Damian? 

I guess that’s just how I see this going then. I rant about whatever I’m having to deal with and you tell me if you agree with how I’m handling it and vice versa. You mention some type of incident with a classmate right? Do you want an outside opinion of that or has your family’s sufficed? Or is there anything else you could use some advice on? I guess we’re just making this up as we go. I mean I suppose there aren’t any rules about relationships that started with one person trying to blackmail the other, right? :P

Hope to hear from you soon! Love,

Marinette

P.S. If this is going to work, you can’t just ignore me when I call you out on being (for lack of a better word) snobbish, Mr. Postscript.

Hello, it’s me again. I just spent like an hour working on chapter nine so my headache’s making itself know again but I wanted to at least post a chapter today. Thank you to anyone who’s been reblogging, liking, or replying to these! It makes the unenjoyable task of reposting worth it! More chapters soon!

Master List

[fruityutas]

taeyong x female!reader

genre ~ angst

synopsis ~ in taeyong’s eyes, you could do no wrong, but to everyone else, you were a she wolf preying on an unfortunate soul.

warnings ~ toxic relationship (please don’t let anyone treat you like this in real life, boy or girl), cursing, abuse

I felt like writing a really good angst lmao. Inspired by the song she wolf by shakira. also please don’t think i condone this type of behavior bc i do NOT!! the relationship portrayed in this story is extremely unhealthy and shouldn't be tolerated.

“i already fucking told you, taeyong. i don’t feel like talking about it.” your eyes scanned the room for your purse, while taeyong sat on the bed pouting.

 “i know but i don’t want you to feel like you can’t talk to me. i’ll always be here to listen, baby.” you rolled your eyes at the man sitting before you, so oblivious to the fact that you were going clubbing for the men and not the drinks with friends like you had told him. you couldn’t say you didn’t love him, you weren’t sure if you did or not, but having other options was always fun. taeyong never liked going out, opting to stay at home and watch movies. you didn’t mind doing these things with him, but when he would always say no to going out even to a place that wasn’t a club, it got boring. you needed some fun in your life, not just the same routine over and over again.

“are you listening to me? are you ok, y/n?” you turned to face him and sighed into a smile. 

 “yes, love?” his eyes crinkled into crescents as he smiled at you.

 “i said i hope you have a good time with your friends. what time do you plan on being home?” you look away from his eyes and ponder. Are you coming home to him tonight? you decide that you will tonight.

 “i’ll try to be home by one, baby. does that sound good?”

 “that’s fine, i just want to know so i can be expecting you!” you walked over to him and hugged him, giving him soft pecks to the crown of his head. you do love him, but you just couldn’t live the same lifestyle as him. it was boring and bland, which seemed to fit his domestic personality.

there’s a she wolf in the closet, open up and set her free

 “taeyong, you’re such a fucking baby. you never do anything but stay home and pout when i go out to actually have fun.” your cool anger wasn’t something new to taeyong, it seemed like every other day it was awakened with something he did or didn’t do. his eyes filled with tears and you sigh, walking towards him. “i’m sorry, bubu. i’m just stressed from work recently. you’re not a baby. i love you, ok?” he nods pitifully and wraps his arms around you, sniffling a little bit. 

 “you should ask them for a day off, if you’re this stressed.” you smile at him and kiss his forehead softly.

 “ i’ll make sure to ask them tomorrow, but for now let’s cuddle, i’m tired.” you both headed upstairs to the bedroom.

s.o.s., she’s in disguise

taeyong had never been in a relationship prior to you, so how was he supposed to know what a healthy and non-healthy relationship looked like? he only knew you. his members would always tell him they were suspicious of you, always asking ‘does she have your best interests at heart?’ it hurt them to think their leader was suffering. but taeyong always brushed them off, saying he was fine and they didn’t need to worry. as the relationship went on, the more you hurt him, only to apologize and for him to forgive you. this deadly cycle was starting to show to his members. taeyong had never been this pale and skinny before, and they were worried.

there's a she wolf in disguise; coming out, coming out, coming out

as you stood in the practice room, glaring at taeyong, his members all gave each other looks of concern. when practice ended, you asked taeyong to come with you to talk privately.

 “what is it, baby?” his normally bright eyes were dull, yet they still held love when he looked at you.

 “you should spend more time with me.” his face filled with slight relief, then he smiled at you.

“i’m sorry that i’m so busy, i will make more time for you. i love you, you know that right?” you smiled with an underlying sinister look that taeyong seemed to not notice.

“of course i do, bubu. i love you too.”

it’s going well so far, she’s gonna get her way

taeyong had never seen you this angry before, and quite frankly, it scared the shit out of him.

 “WHY CAN’T YOU DEFEND ME FROM THEM? ALL THEY DO IS TALK ABOUT ME AND YOU, ABOUT US! AM I NOT A GOOD GIRLFRIEND?” the members all sat in silence, avoiding looking at you and their leader. taeyong took a shaky breath before turning to his members, 

 “i would appreciate it if you didn’t mention my girlfriend anymore. i don’t think it’s any of your business who i date and i feel like it’s disrespectful to our relationship to do so.” they all nodded in unison and apologized to you before walking out of the room. they didn’t get far before they heard you scream at taeyong again, but this time, they heard items being thrown and taeyong’s soft voice pleading for you to stop.

 “WHAT KIND OF BULLSHIT WAS THAT, TAEYONG? THEY DONT GIVE A SHIT ABOUT RESPECTING US IF ALL THEY CAN DO IS SAY SORRY! I CANT DO THIS IF YOU DONT CARE ENOUGH ABOUT ME TO ASK THEM TO GENUINELY APOLOGIZE TO ME!”

 “y/n, i do care about you, please, stop throwing things.” taeyong’s pleads seep through the walls of the dorm, and much to the member’s dismay, you don’t stop your actions. they hear a loud thud against the wall before a small groan comes from their leader. 

 “stop fucking crying like a bitch, taeyong. or are you one? do you even give a damn about my feelings?” taeyong’s soft sniffles can be heard through the dorm and the members are all getting angrier by the second.

 “hey y/n, we think you should leave. we can’t have you acting like this here.” johnny shakily says through the door. you open the door and look up at the tall man with fire in your eyes.

 “i think you should all mind your own fucking business. let’s go taeyong.” the members protest, but taeyong still leaves with you, mumbling through his tears about how it’s going to be ok and that he’ll be back tomorrow.

s.o.s., she’s in disguise

[echodrops]

I just read your post about shipping and energy and I finished it with an interesting question in mind. A los of the examples you use to defend the theory the "tension" Or energy beetwen the characters have some Interactions that could be consider "Toxic" Así a relationship, but because of that tensión that just make more fans ship it. Emotions of jelaously, hate, self worth bla bla. I would like to know your opinión on Toxic relationships on shipping and the difference (1/2?)

And the difference of how people Accept it depending if the ship is Slash or het. Dont get me wrong. What I try to exploin in My crappy English is that sometimes I have seen shippers calling Toxic and unhealthy het ships (I can give you plenty of examples) but at the same time drowning in feelings about the exact same concept on Slash. It can be domination, bickering, power dinamics etc.   Please a dont send this ina negative context its just something I have notice (2/2)

No worries, I got you. I think your point is really valid and there are a lot of discrepancies in how people ship when it comes to het versus slash.

In this case, my answer to this has three different parts to it:

1) I am always very, very cautious about applying the term “toxic” to a fictional relationship because--and I am aware this is not a popular opinion to have on tumblr--I do see a clear distinction between fiction and reality. Can systemic, widespread efforts in media to normalize something have impacts on public perception? Sure. Japan’s thing for twelve-year-old girls in anime is fucked up, my dudes. But in terms of fictional relationships, would any sane person look at things like, say, a psychopathic villain and hero ship and go “Oh man, Sephiroth/Cloud is such relationship goals; can’t wait to find me a serial killer!”? “Yeah dude, I really hope my next girlfriend is a yandere who will stab me sixteen times in non-vital places for fun!” “I can’t wait to engage in armed combat with my evil boyfriend who has enslaved my best friends and won’t give them back unless I let the rest of the world perish!” ...said no real person ever. Lots of things happen in fiction that we--as readers and viewers--can fully appreciate would never be okay in the real world. (And yes, this does extend even to more realistic things like jealousy, bickering, bullying--I like Bakugou as a character, but I’d never be able to tolerate a person who acted like him in real life.) 

I wholeheartedly believe that, outside of illegal things which should obviously be reported, each person has responsibility only for their own fandom experience, and I highly encourage people to make full use of the blocking and filtering features available in fandom spaces to avoid any content that makes them feel uncomfortable or any ships they find to be unhealthy.

So: My opinion on toxic ships is that virtually any ship in this world could be perceived as toxic by someone, and that the alternative--a world in which the ONLY ships we’re allowed to write about or draw or even just like are those which are perfectly healthy pure pure love-fests--sounds horrible to me.

2) Very few people ship without an endgame in mind. I can’t think of anyone who looks at two characters who absolutely hate each other and thinks “Wow, I can’t wait to write a 100,000 word fic in which their relationship does not evolve in the slightest and they end the story hating each other exactly as much as they did on Day 1!” JK, maybe I can, I was in the Durarara fandom, after all. When people ship “toxic” relationships, it is almost always with the idea of character growth and change in mind--the idea is “They are not healthy for each other now, but the whole point of my story or art is that they’ll become healthy for each other over time.” The power of love can heallll peopleeee.

Are the characters jealous of each other now, aggressive toward each other now, enemies right now? Obviously in the shipper’s mind, these are challenges that can be overcome in time by the characters learning and developing into better versions of themselves. Perhaps this is an overly optimistic worldview that leads people to make bad choices in real life--awful people in real life rarely change as much for the better as characters in fiction are capable of changing, but that’s the beauty of fiction: it doesn’t show us people as they are, but people as we wish they could be. We want to believe that the toxic pair of characters can find common ground and heal each other. That the people who are jealous of each other will instead come to appreciate each other by the end. That the misunderstandings will be cleared up. That mistakes will be forgiven. People typically aren’t shipping a toxic ship because they love toxicity--they’re shipping that relationship specifically because they see potential beyond that tension.

We typically ship with “happily ever after” in mind, with the understanding that the life is too hard and people too flawed for that road to always be an easy one.

3) I think you are right that there is a discrepancy in the way that people view het ships and slash ships; namely, there is a discrepancy between the way het ships and mlm ships are viewed.

There are probably a lot of long and complicated sociological explanations for this that someone with more research in the field could explain better, but my first thought on this is that the discrepancy is based primarily on how fans understand male and female dynamics versus male and male dynamics.

For example, society is coded strongly to view a man who hits, dominates, or is aggressive to a woman as a very, very bad guy. (Perhaps this is something widespread media depictions have normalized?) Whereas “dude kicks another guy’s ass” has a whole different connotation in modern views. It is certainly a double standard, and part of the reason that so many male victims of abuse, sexual assault, domestic violence, etc. go ignored. Men are viewed as “too strong” to be victims; therefore, even many of the “wokest” fans can accept two male characters having a violent dynamic, when they would never accept that scenario between a male and female character.

That said, I think we also need to recognize that the way female characters are portrayed in media contributes to this problem. A preponderance of female characters in media are limited in what they can do and the situations they are allowed to engage in. As with BNHA, for example, “good” women are not allowed to be violent, jealous (other than over boys), aggressive, etc. Women are simply treated as not eligible for a wide variety of the dynamics that fictional men are written with. A male character having a superiority-inferiority complex over his also-male rival? Not surprising in the least. A male character having a superiority-inferiority complex over a female rival? Pshhh, yeah right. A female character bitterly jealous over a male character’s power, leadership, or skill? Surely she just admires his ability. Through a combination of misogyny and toxic masculinity, the stories themselves tell readers that unhealthy dynamics are commonplace and acceptable when they happen between two males, while “good” female characters should only be a source of healthy, supportive dynamics.

If we’re talking about unintended messages that writers send readers/viewers when it comes to character dynamics, this is definitely one of them!

tl;dr: Writers train their readers to expect and want certain things, but often do so carelessly or while unaware of the ways their own stereotypical societal views and cliche genre conventions will be taken and transformed by fandoms.

[mothgenes]

annoyed venting and ranting

i keep trying to get people to where i cant fucking see their shit, i really am, those few creators i dont want to touch with a twenty foot pole because they make me uncomfortable but im just wandering around looking at nice peoples blogs and theyre interacting with these people and reblogging from these people and its not like i can stop them, its my fault but i fucking hate seeing these peoples shit i dont like people who dont tag vaguely nsfw content and i dont like seriously suggestive shit that isnt tagged make your blog private for fucks sake i dont care at least fucking tag it thats not a lot to ask for

also dd/lg shit makes me so fucking angry and uncomfortable and i can only tolerate daddy shit in a joking tense and even then its thin fucking ice and im not here for serious daddy shit because what the fuck is that do you want to fuck your dad? do you want people youre having sex with to BE YOUR DAD?? 

and i dont fucking care if someones gotten “better” if you cant fucking apologize for something then im not here for it i hate transphobia and the word trap makes me sick because its a slur and people dont seem to care that its actually transphobic when theyre told its transphobic and they use it anyway and it makes me so mad and frustrated and i cant do anything about it

in addition i dont like predatory relationships where its like haha predator and prey shit hes gonna get him one day its so hot right haha NO its NOT. its NOT HEALTHY, and yall on some SICK SHIT. if you romanticize it, its SICK AS FUCK like if youre going to do that kind of a relationship ACKNOWLEDGE ITS FUCKED UP so kids dont see it and think wow hey thats healthy neat and get stuck in fucking abusive relationships because of it thats not just a thing i like to say it HAPPENS and i hate it

also mean ocs get so fucking old so fast and are SO boring, if an oc is “unflappable” and cant get into a fight where they can actually get their ass kicked around a little to the point where theyre in pain or are scared thats OP and REALLY BORING and MILK TOAST when they act like theyre too good to interact with anyone you can do it right or you can do it wrong and everyone just does it wrong and bland and endlessly irritating

i dont know why im venting so much i just keep it all in and dont talk to people about it but i just want to interact with people without worrying about leaving myself vulnerable to people i dont like or make me super uncomfortable getting their grubby little hands all over my art and my inbox, i dont want transphobia in my inbox and i dont want toxic relationship shit in my inbox unless its NON ROMANTICIZED and shown to be as toxic as it really is rather than OWO non consensual is so sexy 

im gonna stop ranting and just say that OwO and OWO faces make me uncomfortable and im not qualified to help people with serious problems like their friends considering suicide because im not even a legal adult yet its not okay please call the hotline and dont talk to the sixteen year old artist whos just fucking around online

[arplis]

Arplis - News: Why Insecure People Struggle with Vulnerability

As weve seen on this site, vulnerable communication is the solution for finding a healthy relationship and happy life. At a glance, most treat vulnerability as if it is something every person can do. Many believe that if the person sets their mind to it, they can get their needs met in a healthy manner. Unfortunately, this is only the case for secure individuals.

Secure individuals are capable of expressing themselves and regulating their emotions because they believe they are worthy of love and affection. They expect their partners to be responsive and caring. Its easy to see that having such beliefs can lead on to not become overwhelmed as easily. Secure individuals have no issue communicating their needs to their significant other.

The problem is that insecure people -my previous self included- struggle to get in touch with what is really bothering them. Once the emotional floodgates open, its easy to become overwhelmed. These can create irrational thoughts, which can end in a person lashing out.

Meet Tyler. Tyler works at an aerospace company and is currently dating Terra. Like any other average anxious attachment type, Tyler is madly in love with Terra. Terra, who is an avoidant loves Tyler as well -but she calls him crazy for his weird behavior. Sometimes when Tyler gets off work he shows up at Terras apartment not to surprise her, but to check on her. To make sure she isnt cheating. Like most anxious people, Tyler perceives his relationship with Terra as fragile. Hes obsessed with making sure it works.

Moments later he asks his boss if he can leave. He tells his boss his girlfriend is sick, and needed to go to the hospital.

These thoughts are just illusions, but the more he thinks about them, the more anxiety builds up. The more real they feel. The thoughts of what she might be doing is like being punched in the face over and over. Shes cheating. Uppercut. Maybe shes telling someone else she loves him. Left hook. Shes probably laughing at how stupid he is while shes been sleeping behind his back all this time. One-two combo.

This fear and anxiety is a product of his childhood relationship with his mother. Flash back to fifteen years ago. Tylers mom, Susan, was inconsistently responsive to Tyler. Sometimes when he cried and needed attention his mother was there. Other times, she would just ignore him because she had her own agenda that she needed to tend to.

As a result, this formed Tylers emotional blueprint of how relationships are supposed to be. This blueprint guides behavior and suggests what and how things should be done. When Tyler didnt get his needs met through asking in a healthy way, he started to feel emotionally neglected. He felt a low sense of control over the love and affection he wanted to receive.

As these feelings of inadequacy and uncertainty were building up immense emotional pressure, the anxiety swirled throughout his little body. It was so overwhelming that Tyler had to do something. So he packed up his kindergarten backpack with his favorite Batman underwear, a pair of Nike socks and his GI Joe Commander Duke. He walked into his moms room with tears streaming down his face and told her he was running away.

Okay, she said. Have fun living on your own.

Tyler couldnt believe it. His mother didnt give two shits about him. He was worth nothing to her.

He felt sick. Alone. The world was heartless. His solo life began when he walked out of the front door. The pressure to fend for himself crushed him. He walked three blocks and then climbed up his favorite tree to cry his heart out.

Its easy to tell from this life experience why Tyler became anxious and fearful about finding security. This experience hardened the belief that his relationships were fragile, and that any normal level of communication was not enough to gain the reassurance of love Tyler needed.

Experiences like these lead an individual to perceiving themselves as having low-worth. As a result they have low social self-confidence, they lack assertiveness, and they believe they have little control over their life.

When emotions are tense, intellect becomes nonsense.

Flash back to today. Tyler shows up at Terras apartment. He is screaming at her to come out. He is calling her names, and the neighbors are beginning to notice.

Terra comes outside and tells him to leave. He threatens to leave her in response, even though hes only saying it in a desperate hope of gaining reassurance from her.

Tyler has entered into a Vicious Anxious cycle.

Unfortunately Tylers way of expressing his needs by threatening to leave has pushed his partner away. Understandably, his crazy behavior causes Terra to withdraw.

LEAVE, TYLER!

As a result, Tylers emotions build up even more. Just like they did with his mother in kindergarten.

Such behavior doesnt always end in a breakup. This batshit crazy behavior may cause two reactions out of Terra. She may call it off with Tyler. Shes had enough of his shit.

If she does end the relationship, Tyler is left wondering if she was cheating, or if she left him for being too clingy, or if she felt they just werent right for each other.

If Terra does respond or give in to reassuring him, Tyler will never know if she is just responding to the batshit crazy behavior, or if she actually loves him. This makes it even harder and more confusing for Tyler.

Any anxious person talking this path will never figure out if their significant other is answering their real concern whether s/he cares enough to listen to your worries, reassure you, and make you feel safe and loved.

If youre an anxious person, you probably crave a way to get out of feeling all of this inadequacy, shame and anxiety. I know I did.

The way to get out of this toxic relationship is to use vulnerable communication.

Lets change the introduction to the story. Lets Imagine that Tyler texts Terra and speaks honestly about his feelings. Hey. I feel insecure and unloved, and I could really use some reassurance. Tyler reassures her that this feeling has nothing to do with her, but rather how he has been conditioned to perceive relationships. How do you think Terra would respond in this case?

Most likely, Tylers vulnerable communication would encourage Terra to help meet his needs. He isnt attacking her. He isnt threatening her. He is just telling her how he feels, and asking for reassurance. Despite most people finding this a needy characteristic, such emotional mastery is actually a massive turn-on. It shows maturity and courage. Terra will most likely respond kindly and give Tyler the reassurance he needs. It may not be right away since its through texting, but once she does respond she will comfort him and be there. Thats all Tyler needed.

Action Steps:

Despite the biological fear of getting hurt, take a leap of faith when your emotions build up. Avoid using batshit crazy behavior. Instead, use vulnerable communication.

Step 1: Before you act, ask yourself this question: Would Kyle Benson tell you its bashit crazy behavior? texting excessively, threatening or trying to make your partner jealous all count.

Step 2: Communicate your anxious feelings to your partner in a non-accusatory, vulnerable way.

Avoidants

I wouldnt want to avoid the avoidants, now would I? Avoidant attachment-style individuals tend to be unaware of their need for distance and space. As an avoidant, you crave a need for space, a need to run away, yet you dont understand why.

Terra, who is still dating Tyler, just got fired from her job. Tyler, who is an anxious attachment person, immediately overwhelmed her with new job opportunities and connections. Despite knowing that Tyler is doing this out of love, she feels a need to escape, a need to breathe. Shes actually associating this craving for space as a signal that she just isnt that attracted to Tyler.

Theres no point in talking about this to Tyler, because it feels so obvious that he is not The One. So Terra ends it.

This is her 9th failed relationship.

Most avoidants that have attachment issues with intimacy actually lump them in a toxic cycle of failed relationships.

The way to get out of this toxic, fulfilling cycle is to use vulnerable communication.

Step 1: Recognize the need for physical or emotional space.

Step 2: Communicate that need to your partner. If you can, do so early in the relationship before the feeling happens. Doing so not only sets healthy expectations and respects each others needs and boundaries but also lets your partner know that your need for space has nothing to do with them. In turn, this will also calm their attachment style.

If your partner is not responsive within a reasonable time, dump them and go find someone who will. You deserve to be loved and have a healthy relationship where you get your needs met. Not to mention asserting yourself vulnerably actually builds self-esteem and self-confidence, and provides one a greater sense of control.

Isnt that how you want to feel about yourself and your relationships?

A version of this post was previously published on KyleBenson and is republished here with permission from the author.

Talk to you soon.

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The post Why Insecure People Struggle with Vulnerability appeared first on The Good Men Project.

Arplis - News source https://arplis.com/blogs/news/why-insecure-people-struggle-with-vulnerability

[woobatty]

Okay. Hi! Ive been following your blog for months now and i love your content and aesthetic! Its really cool! I have a few questions though, its taken a while to pluck up the courage and i think i may go anon. You post about being bi, how did you first deal with that? Also how did you deal with crushes on friends if you had crushes on friends? I think i may be bi as i am kinda crushing on my BFF but dont know how to deal with it! Sorry if i am wasting your time or being annoying. thanks x

hello! :) thank you so much omg, thats so nice of you to say!! :D and your absolutely not being annoying dont worry, i really dont mind at all :) I was pretty much in the same position 3 years ago when i was first figuring stuff out, so i tried to write out my feelings in the subject.  this is really long so sorry in advance ;-;

So to answer your first question, not very well lmao

At first I was just really fucking scared of being different and not fitting in, and trying to deal with the dawning realisation of what impact being queer would have on the rest of my life. I was only 13 going on 14 so like, i was pretty melodramatic about it. Also i know alot of queer people dont like to talk about it, but at first it really made me uncomfortable to think of same-sex couples. There was alot of internalised homophobia that i didnt even know was there and a ton of repressed emotions for some of my close friends throughout my childhood that i had to unbox. That shit takes time, so dont stress too much if you have to deal with the same? i know its not the same for everyone and good on you if you dont have that same issues, its just the environment I grew up in was pretty… unfriendly towards anything that wasn’t straight or cis. I got much more comfortable with general LGBT-ness though finding good fandoms with a healthy (read: non-toxic, healthy, supportive relationships protrayed in a non-fetishised way) shipping culture and genuinely diverse characters.

One thing i really want to say though is particularly with bisexuality, please dont pressure yourself to find the right label right away. It took me a long time to realise that I was bi and not any other sexuality, and I know a few queer people that jumped to a label before they really were sure and chose a different one later on (which is also totally fine. what defines you is your feelings, not what you use to describe yourself. if you realise a different word suits you better theres no harm in it, i dont really undertand the idea that if you change labels you were lying before thats just fucking dumb). Its not that big of a deal, just focus on being yourself and youll figure it out. Again if you are sure thats great and im really happy for you :) everyones different so it comes easier from some and harder for others

As for your second question, every time ive had a crush on a best friend they’ve been straight so i just never said anything. To me, my friendship to them has always been more important to me than any romantic feelings ive had, yknow? of course its different for everyone and theres certainty no one way to deal with your feelings. If you think its worth the risk go for my dude, and i know a few people that have talked to me about how telling their best friend they liked them was awkward at first but they grew closer afterwards so its not like its the end of the world or anything. i just never did so theres not much i can really tell you definitively, sorry.

If you ever want to talk to me about anything then just send me a message, i promise i wouldnt be annoyed or anything, I totally understand if you dont want to tho no pressure :) fair warning if you do though, im really fucking awkward lol