#and fixing some broken links oops

[laprimera]

2024 rules update! these will go across my blogs, but lemme drop the changed stuff here the rest has p much stayed the same.

thanks for following em btw or asking questions when needed, helps a lot!

. Selective, crossover/oc friendly, mutuals only etc etc. I only interact with mutuals and wait to be followed first before following back if I can see our characters and writing meshing well. This is just so I can have an active dashboard that I can freely interact with. please let me know if you have a side you'd want me to engage and follow if its not prominent somewhere.

. You do not need a verse to interact with my muse. If anything I prefer general crossover to see how they interact in their various worlds.

. While open to shipping and discussing possible connections with my muses I will not insta-ship and please dont assume they are even if we’ve talked about it a bit. It’ll have to be chemistry and interaction based with buildup and note the blog is not ship-focused. The blog’s central plot focuses solely on themselves and their themes unless heavily plotted otherwise.

. Note I don’t do mains or exclusives in any way. While I do have close mutuals I’ll interact with a lot because of comfort there are no central characters or plots otherwise besides my own. If a muse wants to get involved in some exclusive way please come by me to see if we can plot something out.

. I’m not interested in poly-shipping. Nothing wrong with it ofcourse but Im only really comfortable shipping with friends or mutuals I know and on the same space as I’m in. I’d ask for a single-verse for my muse or we can go through a platonic route if your muse is exclusively poly, but as with anything please come talk to me for anything.

. You dont have to ask to reply to an ask. Please do! If anything I ask if possible to follow through on a meme or ask you’ve sent be turned into an interaction unless the point is moot or its a drabble. Not required of course, it just helps start and build interactions!

. Note the plot is centralized to my characters and canons put under the v. main tag. Dash events, rpc happenings and the whathavs unless I say so otherwise are not canon and often put under the crack tag or untagged. Please dont assume anything from my muse or expect them to engage either as sadly I have to step away from the dash often and cant catch up. I prefer to have control over my narrative and if you want something outside included please plot with me!

[targaryenrealnessdarling]

‘just kill me and be done with it’

Based off an ask by @rochyu ‘where y/n was Aemonds wife (daemon and rhaenyra daughter) was attacked by some guards who had been sent to assassinate him. She was pregnant’ 

Warnings below the cut~

Links to my Taglists: General Taglist | Aemond Targaryen Taglist  

Warnings: threat of noncon, murder, gore, blood

A/N: I got inspired and wrote this basically in two days, but I am not super happy with it oops. I changed the request a bit because it initially included noncon but I don’t really wanna write that, so changed it slightly, hope that’s ok requester!

It was an abnormally quiet evening in the Keep. You adored moments like these in such a busy environment, after all the hatred and war that had developed between your families. You sat in your usual large armchair, a dress laid in your lap that you were fixing various holes in, eyes squinting to focus on the tiny, fine detailing. 

A small laughter filled the air and you looked ahead to the two little people sat before the fire, the flames illuminating their silver-gold heads. You smile softly at Helaena’s twins, oh how you doted on the two innocent little souls. It was rare that you enjoyed moments like this on twin-watching duty as Helaena was very rarely out of the Keep. But all three of Alicent’s children had gone to retrieve their fourth sibling, Daeron, from Oldtown to join in the war, Alicent having gone with them. Leaving you in the safety of the servants and some of the Kingsguard to protect you.

You and Aemond had been married many years and at the time, it had been to mend the rift between the two sides of your family caused by Luke slicing Aemond’s eye on that fateful night at Driftmark. Back then, you had been used by your parents Rhaenyra and Daemon as a tool to bring the family closer together, as Viserys was alive then, it was paramount to keep up appearances. When you turned ten and seven, the wedding came and when Aemond had cloaked you to bring you under his protection that day, you felt afraid. You did not know what this Aemond was like.

But on that wedding night he insisted on treating you with great care and delicacy, taking every fear you had to heart and promising to fix whatever was broken. The memories of that night, even years later, were the most happy ones you had and all the days and months that came after sought to rival it. For such a man with a reputation even in the Keep, he was sensitive, delicate, caring and most of all loving to his Princess.

Even though you had yet to be blessed with children, it was not for lack of trying, but now as the years passed you began to believe it may be an issue that lies with you. And for this, you felt like you were not a worthy wife. A fact which Aemond denied endlessly. 

He seemed the only person in your life that attempted to lift your spirits, at such a tumultuous time like this. Your parents, of whom you would love unconditionally, were now on the other side of the war and had not attempted to contact you since waging the war for Rhaenyra’s throne. Daemon, on the other hand, would not be so forgiving. Even going as far to refuse the marriage at the time of your betrothal, he was doubly angered that you were married even now. For now, you belonged to the greens and he felt as if he had lost his daughter to them.

Despite Aemond only having left this morning, you felt the ache of loneliness in your heart and sighed out loud. But your quiet evening was interrupted when you jumped out of skin at the doors opening with a mighty slam. Your wide eyes met the door, the twins even looking over in shock. Two men, both the most different in stature, stood at the doorway. Your wide eyes noted their weapons, the larger, burly man carried a sword that you swore was almost the length of you and the other smaller, lanky man carried a dagger. 

You ushered the twins behind you as you stood to attention, swallowing heavily as your eyes met the slumped up body of a Kingsguard on the other side of the door. His body hung across the threshold, eyes wide and blood pooling beneath his body. And at the sight of this, you felt the hairs on your arms stand entirely on end. But the men approached slowly, the larger one with a smile wide on his face.

“There you are” the larger man said, twirling his large sword in his hand. The twins gripped at your dress, whimpering in fear, “We’ve been looking for you”

“Who are you, tell me at once” you ordered, trying to stabilise your voice to get the fear out of your tone. But it simply served to make the larger man laugh once more. The other’s eyes were on the children the entire time, like a vulture trying to sneak a peck at a corpse. 

“Who would have thought our dear Queen had such a sharp tongue”

Queen? You stood confused. And you wracked your brain for a moment. And then it hit. They thought you were Helaena with her twins. You shared the hair and the eyes and Helaena was indeed not here. But with fear deep set in your bones, you were rendered speechless and felt entirely powerless.

Whether it was Helaena or her children they sought to harm, you swore to her you would protect them. All these thoughts buzzing around your fearful mind, you sought to open the secret doorway you and Aemond would often use in the early days of your marriage, a door that could luckily be locked from the inside. 

Running with the twins to the corner of the room, you opened and shoved them inside, using your hurried words, “Dear ones, for the love of your mother, lock this door and do not open it, do you understand me?” you ask them, tears hot behind your eyes as you notice their frightened little faces, begging to cry, begging to be held.

“Please don’t leave us” Jahaera whined, reaching out. You looked behind you to see the two men approach, hastier this time.

“Lock this door and do not come out” 

You slam the door and feel a pang at your chest in relief as you hear them lock it from the inside almost instantly. Your chest heaved with fear and one single tear ran down your cheek as you turned, only to find the larger man had appeared so close to you. With a hand grasped at your throat, tightening more and more he slammed you against the stone wall. Your eyes widened at the force of it, hands coming to attempt to pry his large hand from your neck to no avail, mouth open to say something, but with no air to supply it.

He held you there, a grin on his face, “Sneaky whore”

Your fingers tried to wrap around his, wanting desperately for at least some air to pass into your lungs. The other man spoke,

“Can’t get this damned door open!” he shouted, kicking at it. You closed your eyes, hoping and praying the twins had escaped to another place in the secret doorways, so they didn’t have to hear all this. The man before you grunted in displeasure and without a second thought had released his hold on your throat to deliver a firm, back-handed slap to the face. 

A small yelp escaped you as you fall to the ground. The room span and your vision blurred, but holding your face you looked up to see his sheer perverse glare.

“If we cannot have his first son, we shall have his wife”

The words were supposed to be laced with fear, but at his sheer stupidity to mistake you for Helaena the only thing you could do was smirk and let out a weak laugh. Propping yourself up on an elbow, you spit out,

“Since you’ve fucked up our original plan, tell me this” he spat out, “Where is the Prince Aemond”

“You fools”

His expression instantly changed, and not one for a damaged ego you yelp out again as his hand clamps around your arm to drag you across the room. The familiar prick of fear hits your spine as you realise he’s thrown you to the bed, pinning one of your arms to the mattress below you. He only laughs loudly at your expression and your futile attempt to hit him with the other. But one of his large hands was big enough to capture both of your small ones and you writhed about, wanting to be free from underneath him.

The mention of his name had your face pale, and you begin to tear up with the realisation that he may well find you dead in the morning having been sullied and murdered by these two intruders. If such a thing were to happen, he would be heartbroken. And by the Gods, you would not like to see Aemond when he is driven by revenge and nothing else.  

“Where is the kinslayer, whore” he commands it this time by shouting in your face, you wince at his sudden volume before opening your eyes once more. The silence is palpable and you must know he isn’t a patient man. So you say nothing for a moment, until his hand is in the air, ready to hit you once more.

“Just kill me and be done with it” your words are heavy with hatred.

He merely chuckles and pushes you further up the bed, so your head is below the pillows. He pulls a dagger from his belt and holds it forcefully to your throat, and it is so sharp that you yelp as he leads the point from your chest to your neck as if cutting through butter, the blood spills from the empty cuts down your body and stains your dress.

“Oh we will kill you. But we’d like a bit of fun, first. Since you’re here all on your own, we can make you scream”

You gasped loudly as the man begins to rip your dress, tearing the skirt into a thousand tiny pieces. And you do go to cry out, but feel that familiar sharp pain against your throat and instead choose to stay quiet, attempting to instead use your legs to kick against him as much as you could. Even at this, he is too big to care of your tiny pleas and instead laughs loudly, so much so that his head rolls back.

“Fight all you like”

You screw your eyes shut. If this was actually happening, you did not want to see it.

He rips a sleeve off the dress, exposing your shoulder and he laughs sardonically, releasing your hands for a moment to pull up the skirts of your dress so they are over your hips. You whimper out, bracing yourself until your eyes snap open. That’s it, you thought. Aemond always kept his dagger under his pillow. And with the man above you so focussed on ripping apart your luckily many layers of dress, your hand wanders to the pillow. Silently praying he had not taken it with him.

As the man is about to rip apart your smallclothes, laughing to himself as he did so, your small hand clamps around the handle of the dagger Aemond had left behind and without a second thought, you plunge it to the hilt into his throat. For a moment, you wondered if you had done anything as he just stayed completely still. Pulling the dagger from him, blood spurts from the new wound and all over your dress, completely drenching you from the neck down in his blood.

If you weren’t so hellbent on getting him off you might have gagged at the thought of such a despicable man’s blood being all over you, but right now, you could not have cared less as you pushed his heavy, now lifeless form off you and onto the ground. Standing over him, his blood stained the floor and his eyes vacantly looked over to you, wide-eyed at the prospect of dying. There was a sick sense of pleasure to see such a horrible man die.

Clutching the dagger tightly in your hand still, you moan out in pain as the other, lanky man turned upon you, angered at the death of his friend. Before you could swipe the dagger, he pulled you into a headlock, his own dagger-wielding hand high and intent to push into you. Your hand went out to his arm, stopping his hand. And you knelt there in his tight headlock, hand shaking and pushing his own weapon away from your face. 

Eventually the lack of air began to affect your head and you felt light-headed, vision blurry and the strength put against his hand beginning to falter. Without really thinking, you took the dagger in your other hand and aimed it behind you, hearing a squelch as it was drawn into his stomach. Desperately, you twist it further into him, satisfied it has at least done something. 

Your suspicions are correct when his strength weakens around your neck and behind his hand and confident that he is beginning to falter, you pull the dagger from him and drive in again, and again, and again, until he is barely fighting back. 

His body falls away from you to the ground, but you barely look at him and slump back against the wall, looking ahead at the floor as if dissociated. Blood is dripping across every part of your body, down your neck, against your shoulders, down your legs and it has invaded every particle of your otherwise cream dress, the other parts of it are scattered about the end of the bed. Proof that he had tried to sully you.

And there you sat, hoping and praying that at least the twins were safe somewhere. Your breathing eventually evens out, but the hazy feeling doesn’t leave you and that feeling of searing danger is still there in your bones, even though the two men lay dead on the ground. Still and lifeless. 

You do not hear a member of the Kingsguard arrive and make their may over to you, their hurried speaking of concern all but muffled to you. It is only when they place a hand on your bare shoulder that you wail out, screaming for them to get their hands off you. The tears that were held back the entire time now spilling from your eyes, leaving clear trails against the blood on your neck and chest in fat lines. You felt completely powerless.

“Get away from me!” you screamed, not wanting the touch of anyone, you backed yourself up against the wall further, ordering for him to leave. For a moment, he watched, concerned and wide-eyed before obeying. 

As he left, the doors were left open and servants scurried about as well as Kingsguard, frantically searching for more intruders but finding none. But you simply sat there, staring ahead and letting the tears fall down your face silently. The truths of the last hour hitting you like a train. You could have died. The twins could have died. And Aemond…if he were here…

The thought of Aemond sent a new wave of tears down your face. Would he want you after this?...

The sun had long descended by now and the servants had attempted to approach you, even the female ones, but every single one was chased away by your outbursts, simply wanting to be left alone.

In the dead of night, perhaps even early the next morning, the Green family hastily returned. All three of Alicent’s children escaped the carriage as soon as it arrived. Aegon and Helaena afraid for the safety of their children and Aemond for the safety of his beloved wife. He could feel his heart beating furiously out of his chest and he had wanted to vomit the entire trip home once his mother received a raven on the trip. It was a letter addressed to her only, 

A son for a son.

Lock or no lock, the Queen will be a son short by morning.

Of course, the family had turned around straight away and hurriedly returned home, albeit several hours after the intrusion had actually taken place. The Keep looked as if it had been turned upside down and the worried voices of the three children and Alicent rang out in echoes, halfway between cries and shouting.

A Kingsguard collared Aemond in one hallway, leading him to the entrance of the room where you were still sitting, shaking. And once Aemond saw you at the other side of the room, his heart stilled in his chest with fear and despair. He could see the large, dark colours of blood that stuck to the ground as well as your body, though you were far from his grasp.

As if approaching a terrified animal, his steps were light and he swallowed heavily, crossing the room with such quietness. The bodies had not been taken away, for the fear of upsetting you within the room and Aemond observed them. His heart ached. They were larger men than you, much larger. And how you had been able to put up a fight with them at all was a surprise to everyone.

“Y/n?...” he said quietly, but you did not move. And if not for your laboured breathing and widened eyes, he wouldn’t have been able to tell you were conscious.

He wanted so desperately to reach out and hold you, but the Kingsguard told him you were in a delicate condition and allowed nobody to touch you.

He was so close now, he could see every line of tears that you had made against the dark, crimson blood. His hand reached out to your wrist, barely touching it and you pulled back and screwed your eyes shut.

“No! Please…get away!...” you screamed, immediately shaking with fear, dagger in the other hand raised to strike if needed. 

Aemond held his hands in the air, heart shattering at his wife’s words. 

“Okay…okay…” he cooed soothingly, “...I’m going to stay here, okay?”

No response but a whimper came from you. His eyes raked over you and he felt the desire to clench his fists. Your dress was completely ruined and he noted that your smallclothes had been ripped and discarded to the ground. At this, rage began to boil inside of him.

“Y/n…it’s me…” he started, his voice low and calm, “...Aemond”

Your lids flinched slightly and he had some hope that he was getting through to you. You whimpered again, hand tightening around his dagger.

“I will not come any closer…until you want me to, okay?” he said, “can you open your eyes for me, my love?...”

You took a scattered breath in at the pet name, as if drawing you back to the surface from drowning, eyes opened and looked ahead at him. But mostly in shock and relief. Your mouth was open as if to say something, but you simply sat there, shivering in fright.

“It’s me, my love…your husband…”

Aemond sees the recognition in your eyes and you want to laugh with glee, but all you manage is a smile that is laced with relief but also fear. 

“A-Aemond…” you inhale a breath to let out a cry, “I’m sorry…”

He is on his knees, slowly inching towards you. “Shh..it’s okay…you are safe, okay?” 

You only give him a short and silent nod.

“Now…I’m going to need you to do something for me” he starts, inching a little closer, “...I’m going to need you to drop the dagger, okay?”

Your breath hitches, the fear slowly beginning to ebb away at the sight of your husband.

Your weapon-wielded hand reaches out to your side, watching Aemond the entire time and he seems to let a breath that he didn’t realise he was holding loose when the dagger lands with a rattle against the stone floor. He slowly reached out to take it from near you, placing it in its rightful place at his side now. 

“Now, the maesters need to come in to see y-”

“They didn’t do it” 

Your interruption stops Aemond in his tracks and he kneels to listen to you as you tearfully relay, finally, what had happened.

“They didn’t…” you say, hesitant to say the word, “...they didn’t manage to…”

You can see the relief on Aemond’s face as he understands what you mean, his eye closes, not tightly. 

“I had to keep them safe…” you say, referring to the twins.

Aemond nods, a ghost of a smile on his face, “Yes…yes, you did brilliantly, my love. The twins are safe…”

Almost too quickly, you are launching yourself into Aemond’s awaiting arms, head firmly against his chest. There are no more tears left in you, so you simply revel in his warm arms around you, hugging you tightly. He felt the hot tears prick at his eye at your sudden change of mood for the better and he himself sank into this feeling, not caring of the blood that was getting all over him.

“Aemond…I s-swear…they didn’t…” you looked up at him, your sobs making your voice waver, fearing your reputation if anything else.

He cradled your face with one large hand, wiping the tears away, “Shh…my love, I believe you…”

He stroked your hair lovingly and you seemed to calm down.

“The maesters would like to take a look at you…you do not have to do anything more than necessary-”

“No” you shook your head, knowing that the maesters would want to inspect intimately. But, you thought, it was best to quell any rumours right away, “I will…” you answer, voice still wavered but more sure now.

Aemond had been with you the entire time, holding your hand tightly as the maesters performed their examinations. Some were trivial and easy, others more intimate in the face of the near tragedy that had occurred. And while one maester began to clean the wound on your throat, the other approached Aemond, as your husband, to deliver his diagnosis.

“There is no trauma to her intimately, you will be happy to know” the maester began. Aemond nodded and looked over at you as the other cleaned your wounds and the blood from you. Of course, he had known that already. He believed the truth that you had told him.

“She will have some scars, but it will be difficult to tell how the experience has affected the baby for some time”

Aemond nodded, but hesitated at the word ‘baby’, a spark sent through him. Almost at the same time, you whipped your head up and looked toward the other maester in confusion.

“Baby…?” you ask quietly. The maester turns to you, nodding.

“Of course, Princess. When was the last you bled?”

Your eyes met the floor in thought, “But I bled two moons ag-oh” the realisation dawned on you. And your eyes met Aemond’s, but he was just as shocked as you.

“For certain?” you ask.

“Oh yes” the maester responded, as if it were obvious.

Rather uncharacteristically, Aemond rushed to you and pulled you into his arms, one hand stroking your hair while the other stroked your back. You melted into his embrace, for the first time in hours, feeling as if some luck had been bestowed onto you. Had the gods determined you a worthy wife? Finally.

“Oh my little fighter…” Aemond murmured into you. He shuts his eye forcefully to blink away a tear, with the knowledge he has now that he could very well have lost more than just his wife this night.

For the first time in hours, you cried with happiness, tightening your arms around your husband as the tears fell down your face.

But the fear lingered and you had remembered how fragile life itself had been in the last day, so when Aemond pulls away and sees your face, he tucks a strand of hair behind your ears and leans down, “What is it, my love?”

You look up at him, the emotions fighting in your head, “Aemond…” your mouth is open trying to find the words, “I am happy…of course…but I am also afraid”

He cups your face lovingly, “I know my love…I know” 

As he brings you in for another embrace, he knows that no words right now can quell that fear you have after the traumatic experience you just went through. You felt vulnerable, like prey and Aemond promised himself he would do whatever it takes to make you feel safe. Even if it meant staying by your side for as long as you needed him. 

dividers by @firefly-graphics

[reitziluz]

future!! i love hearing about peoples bad endings for their ocs

(here's the ask game post. i've gotten/done betrayal, desire, future, nightmare and secret so far.)

oh man. oh boy. 

disclaimer: with few exceptions, everyone taking part in the present of the story is at risk of becoming a part of a nightmarish flesh blob situation. or something along those lines. details might be subject to change. there's a corrupted world-eater lurking about. so, as much as possible, i’ll instead picture the worst futures if that wouldn't be a factor. 

future: What's the worst possible future for your OC? Are they taking steps to avoid that outcome? Are they even aware it's a possibility? 

kimon: i’ve alluded to ascension being a fate worse than death in most cases in this world. yeah. kimon is at huge risk of getting spiritually spaghettified. he is keenly aware of this, as he has met a predecessor of sorts who got stuck in one of the worst outcomes of this, and the fate/prophecy targeting him is linked to it too. he is not taking steps, he’s running at full tilt to get as far as possible from it. using his power to do specific kinds of healing is one part of that.

vaal: so vaal is kind of doomed to the world-eater scenario. specifically becoming sort of a reaper for it. e has absolutely no clue. at the point where e’s would be getting signs and eir alarms would start blaring, e wouldn't have time to even resist getting taken over. oops! 

arin: dying disgraced and destitute. a scorned failure. they occasionally catastrophize about it, but also realistically anticipate it as the end result if, for example, they were trying to take shortcuts and cheat to accomplish their goals. they're literally working to prevent it.

tess: having her spirit broken, never getting to control her own life, being unable to make a difference in the world. her relative getting away with their schemes while she gets disposed of. like arin, she's very aware of the possibility, and working hard to avoid it. she is very focused on making her relative to answer for their crimes and to gain her freedom. 

sam: her worst future would be one of loneliness after her community collapsed. she is consciously trying to prevent it by preventing or fixing potential root causes. people dying as their working and living conditions deteriorate, infighting tearing them apart, that kind of stuff. 

leskel: he, too, is doomed to the world-eater scenario. he would be subsumed and remade into an avatar of sorts. he knows he is connected to this fate, but doesn't know the details and has made some bold assumptions. he’s actively pursuing this future. 

[lizard-shifter-noms]

Broken Bloodlines Chapter 11

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Part 11 already? were almost to the end!

only two more plus the epilogue!

have fun reading!

and as always reblogs are appreciated! (Also ASK’s are open so feel free to bother me!)

AO3 Link for those that prefer the layout there; https://archiveofourown.org/works/44627188

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Turning around I saw that Oakley had already found the weird Teal stuff and had instructed Fable on what to do with it.

Well if he applied the stuff by himself it would probably also heal all the minor cuts on his hands as well.

 The container of it was also only a fourth full now,  I hoped he'd be able to make more of it as soon as he fully moved in.

Then again the guy had absolutely no system when it came to storing things.

“Mrrw?”

I looked down at the sound to see the cat brushing up against my legs.

“There you are, c’mere”

I picked her up and let her sit one one arm while stabilizing her with the other one.

She immediately flopped over so I had to hold her like a baby instead and softly tapped at my chin.

This really was one of the nicest cats I had ever met, if not THE nicest.

It also seemed the Teal stuff wasn't needed anymore seeing as Oakley was putting the lid back on and just shoving the thing into one of the many shelves brimming with largely unidentifiable things.

“You know the little cat you have there would make a good familiar for someone with magic”

Both me and Fable looked at him with various degrees of confusion.

“What do you mean by that? 

I think she's a little too nice to be the accomplice of a witch”

He tilted his head and looked at me like I was an idiot, again.

“Not every witch is evil, man i ought to talk to Rikaad about your schooling system! Seems like it's doing a poor job!

Also not every magic wielder is a witch and not every magic wielder has a familiar, most don't actually as finding a suitable animal is quite hard”

Huh, i hadn't known that, then again we did fight an ice mage so maybe i really was just dumb.

Also I did not go to school, which Oakley seems to have forgotten.

“Oakley i never went to school,  they would have killed me before i put one foot in the building”

Oakley looked at me strangely and Fable was actually rather horrified.

oops we had forgotten to tell him the more bad side of the History.

I'd fix that while both of us were recovering.

Luckily thanks to that Teal stuff Fable should be fit in no time.

“Well that sucks, but at least you didn't turn out to be a complete idiot like some other people i met throughout time.

I can show you some of the more basic stuff after I'm done dragging my stuff here if you want?”

Like a teacher or  what? Also I had no idea what he considered basic knowledge but there was no doubt I'd learn at least something.

“I- uh sure why not, i don't doubt that'll be useful”

The winged man nodded then went to a cupboard that looked recently dusted and fished out two spoons that definitely weren't even from the same maker.

“Perfect! And now that the jam has cooled down, do you wanna try it?”

Right, the herb jam, I did have to say that it smelled good so why not?

I really doubted it was poisonous but I hoped Oakley had cleaned the spoons.

“Sure, it doesn't smell bad so why not?”

I looked over to Fable who just nodded in confirmation and I noticed that he looked kinda tired.

Oh right, the teal stuff takes energy to properly heal so him being tired was no surprise.

We could go take a nap after this,  I myself was also kind of worn out and sore from all that had happened.

Oakley dipped the spoons in the glass closest to him and then held them out to us so we each took one.

Luckily the spoon looked to be clean,  aside from the jam of course so without further ado i tried it.

It was sweeter than I expected seeing as Rosemary was more of a savory herb, at least in cooking, 

but it was possible that Oakley just put a ton of sugar in it.

But all in all it was pretty good.

“It's a lot sweeter than I thought it would be,  How much sugar did you pour into this? Aside from that its actually good and i bet the Kitchen staff would love the recipe”

I looked over to Fable to see what he thought of it but I could only see him sitting at the table with a mildly confused and miserable expression.

“She stole the entire spoon”

He pointed at the cat who sat on the other end of the table and was currently lickign the spoon clean.

Oakley also saw it and immediately started laughing his weird cawing laugh.

It took barely a second for me to join in and Fable started laughing as well, the sound still weirdly reminding me of a bell.

That mixed with Oakley’s cawing tone made it sound like weirdly out of sync music where only one person knew how to play an instrument.

To my ears it was a lovely sound, both my Brother and Oakley were also getting along, well as much as one could with the strange winged man.

The cat however was quite unbothered by the sound,  at least I thought so at first but then she stepped on the broad part of the spoon making it flip into the air and land in front of Oakley.

Yeah, he was right that the cat probably had at least a minor amount of magic.

Though it was unlikely she knew how to use it.

Oakley grabbed the spoon and tossed it in the sink where already some other cutlery was.

He gave Fable a new spoon to try,  making sure the cat wouldn't get it this time even if she tried.

Fable did agree with me that it was indeed sweeter than one would think and after reapplying his bandages,  even if they wouldn't be needed for that much longer,  We left to go back to the castle with the cat in tow who was insistent on being carried by Fable.

Considering he was tired and the teal stuff wasn't yet working that fast he kind of had to lean against me to avoid falling over.

I decided that since all that madness with Maringand was over I could finally move back into my shed,  This time Fable actually could use the loft as well.

I did wonder though how long he was going to stay now,  after all the Teal stuff would fix his limp leg in maybe a day tops.

I wished he'd reconsider his plan, at least for a little bit.

He'd been here barely a week and more than half of that he had been trapped in a horrible mindset.

I liked him, sure, he’s my brother after all, but at the same time I barely knew anything about him.

That did make me wonder though how much he even knew about himself.

He had been in that horrible mindset for years,  he probably didn't even know much about himself either.

Maybe him going out to try and find what kind of person he was would be the right thing to do after all.

Besides, after the tiny glimpses i got from what he was like telling him what to do would be the wrong thing, not to mention kinda fucked up.

No, Fable had every right to go and do what he wanted,  it was none of my business.

He was now leaning half asleep on me and I had to half drag him across the ground, it was a wonder he hadn't dropped the cat yet.

Yeah i’d get him to the loft and then let him sleep till the next day,  He needed it, a lot.

That would also give me some time to think of something to give him that he could take with him on his journey.

Nothing big or heavy of course, but just something little so he had something from his little brother.

Maybe something useful? 

That was of course the obvious choice.

But what?

Oh well, I could decide that later,  for now it was better if we both just rested a bit.

We reached the shed pretty quickly and without running into anyone else.

To be fair I doubted I'd want to chit chat anymore for today so that was just right for me.

Fable had by now almost fallen asleep while upright,  and still somehow holding the cat albeit that a lot more lopsided now.

That Teal stuff might be a huge help with injuries but apparently the trade off was that one got extremely tired really fast if used.

I had to keep that in mind for future reference.

Half dragging Fable up to the loft and onto a makeshift bed that was a little too short for him I also put the blinds on all the windows.

While I was busy with that the cat went and used my Elven Brother as a mattress.

He didn't react to it though, already out like a candle.

Well the sun would only begin to set in like an hour or so,  So what else was there to do for me?

I wasn't tired, at least not yet,  but there also wasn't really anything to do for me.

Fresh air would be nice though, and as long as the cat was there Fable wasn't alone either so a few minutes walking around would probably do me good so I went out of the door once again.

The last few days had been stupidly stressful and very chaotic,  and I honestly doubted that i had comprehended all of it yet.

I didn't really want to anyway.

We had lost people due to Winton’s stupid greed, most of them complete strangers to me that I had never met before, and now never would.

And of course some people I did know were now gone as well.

While Oakley somehow was fine Barsen was not,  a fact that still didn't really want to go into my head.

Who would take care of the Garden now?

And who would let us do stupid things around the castle without telling anyone?

Who else could ever be the kind and calm presence he had been?

I would never see that steady pillar of kindness and acceptance ever again.

And on top of that what would happen to his stuff?

Would it just be tossed out like I had seen city dwellers do with the belongings of people that died without any relatives?

I hoped not, and I doubted any of the castle residents would let that happen either.

But it still felt like someone had torn a hole into something Important that couldn't be repaired.

Despite not knowing the man for as long as most of the Castle did he had still been a very dear friend.

He had even given me tips on how to care for the wild array of plants that grew on my back in the Ardua form.

Though Half of them weren't exactly doable considering they grew in flesh instead of dirt.

What a fucked up thing taken out of context.

My wanderings had taken me without my noticing along the outer wall all the way to where Barsen had Died.

Aside from the patches of mud and the bent branch on the sapling there wasn't even that much evidence of what had happened here.

Well, if one could ignore the rusty stains that is.

Seemed like my grimm musings had taken me here somehow.

I felt like throwing up once again but pushed past the feeling.

I didn't have anything to throw up anyway.

Still, at the sight something in me Ached terribly.

Despite all the differences and things that happened in between i knew the feeling, i knew it well even.

It felt like shortly after my mother had died and part of me had rejected that reality for a good week or so.

It was the feeling of loss.

What a terrible thing to experience once again.

I briefly wondered if the plants would grieve him if they could.

They probably would,  he had treated them with such care and respect after all.

The tiny sapling here had even refused to let him die face down in the dirt.

Looking at it I saw that it was some sort of willow tree,  but I was no expert and the thing reached maybe my waist so it was impossible to tell what kind.

I did feel sad for the broken branch though.

Maybe I could mend it?

I didn't really have any string on me for that though,  Maybe I could use something else?

Oh wait, hair could work.

Not the human hair I had right now but the long and thick strands of the Ardua mane would probably work just as good as string.

Going a good few paces away from the little clearing so i wouldn't damage anything i carefully shifted to the quadrupedal form.

Trying to use the clawed paws to get some of the fur didn't work as well as I had hoped so I tried to tangle some of my mane in a thorny bush which had a lot more success.

Shifting back to the smaller human scale again I fished the few hairs that got stuck out of the shrubbery again.

Huh, they were a lot longer than I thought they'd be.

While i had expected them to maybe be half my lower arm long,  they were actually the length of my entire arm,  shoulder to wrist and as thick as a fine sewing thread.

How weird.

Well whatever, it would surely work for what i had planned at least.

Going back over I carefully put the bent branch back in its place and then used the strands of fur to fix it into place.

There, now it could grow properly again.

I stepped a few paces back to make sure I hadn't messed up my poor attempt at helping the plant up.

It didn't seem like it but then again I was no expert.

What a strange sight still, a lone sapling in a place where not too long ago Carnage had taken place.

It still felt like someone had twisted an ice cold knife into my Heart,  well the beating one,  and I knew that this awful feeling would persist for quite some time.

I should probably leave now, the tree wasn't as broken as before and staying here could not be good for my Mental health.

Taking one last look at the only thing that had stood witness to what happened here I turned around and went back towards the castle.

While walking through the Garden I noticed that the Plants still seemed miserable, branches drooping down,  Petals already closed despite it being only late afternoon and the grass not as vibrant as it had been just a few days beforehand.

Could plants grieve? If so, these certainly were doing as such.

It still was weird to be in the middle of that so I hurried along forward and back to the relative safety of the castle.

I reached it within minutes and debated on what to do for now.

It didn't look like anyone was out on the benches or front yard anymore, good, that would spare me some smalltalk.

I didn't feel like talking at all at the moment anyway, my mind was still slowly processing what had happened, albeit lately so.

I wanted some peace, but Fable was sleeping in the Loft of my shed and I really did not want to stay in the Garden right now.

Well there weren't many other places i knew, especially ones where there were no people.

So that left the Library and… The tower that allowed us to see the enemies approaching early.

It was possible that someone was in the library at this time to read or to also get some peace so I'd go to the tower.

If anyone wanted to get to me they had to climb a stupid amount of stairs first and considering i didn't even want to do that i doubted anybody else would follow me.

After a good few minutes of stair climbing I was at the top of the tower for the second time in my life, only to find to my extreme surprise I was not as alone as I thought I'd be.

There, on the stone bank that went around the outer wall under the windows sat a familiar red headed form.

He was clutching a longish box that I was pretty sure contained a beautifully made telescope with plant based engravings.

I debated for a moment if I should leave or not but that choice was taken from me as Robin turned around to look at me.

The skin under his eyes was a little red but that could also have been an effect from the setting sun.

I chose not to mention it, instead I just silently sat next to him as he tilted his head and pointed to the seat next to him.

We sat in silence for what felt like forever, just staring out at the ocean without actually seeing it.

It was very probable that this time both of us spaced out because there seemed to have been a good hour or so missing seeing as it was now dark out while just a moment ago the sun had just begun to set.

Huh, so that's what it was like.

At a shifting sound I glanced over to the rusthead who was now leaning his forehead on the box while hugging the rest of it.

Why did he have it in the first place?

I wasn't about to ask that though,  it would probably just make everyone upset again.

But as it turned out i didn't have to ask as he gave that information of his own accord.

“Do you remember when you told me to go give Barsen the Telescope back and then go look after the kitchen staff?”

I nodded, I had done that so he wouldn't randomly run after us into the battle.

“Well i went to give it back, but after like twenty minutes he came by the kitchen and handed it to me again.

He told me to keep an eye on the box like it was my own and if I did a good job of that I could have it one day.

Then he left, and… didn't come back.

So I guess it's mine now?

I mean he did say if i kept an eye on it i could have it,  but I just don't understand why…?

And why would he give it to me of all people? 

I'm clumsy and I drop things all the time. 

He knew that, so why give something so precious to me?”

While talking tears had begun to fall from his eyes even if he tried his best to keep his voice steady.

I had no answer to any of the things he'd been talking about,  Why would I have?

Robin had been better friends with the Gardener than I had, spent more time with him as well seeing as Robin wanted to learn about plants.

Maybe that was why, if Barsen had known there were soldiers while the castle was largely unguarded he probably wanted to ensure the pretty telescope went to someone that shared his love for plants at least a little.

I moved to hug the shaking redhead who, while being strangely quiet about it, was still leaving tear tracks down his face.

He sort of, just flopped into my hold, still silently crying and it was taking almost all of my willpower not to start crying too.

“I don't know,  but if he trusted you to take care of it then I don't doubt that you can.

He was not stupid, far from it really, so if he judged you to be the best candidate to keep a eye on it then you have to be just that”

He sniffled a little and wiped his eyes with the corner of his sleeve.

“You think so?”

“I wouldn't say it otherwise, couldn't anyway”

He made a humming sound and just continued to lay there in a miserable heap.

Looking out of the tower again I saw that it was completely dark now, the only light coming from a torch Robin must have brought with him beforehand.

Maybe we should head back down now,  if the torch went out we would have absolutely no light to descend the stairs and I for one was not keen on falling down all of them.

“I think we should go back down,  it's dark and i don't want to fall should the torch go out.

You feel like getting up?”

He just made a grumbling noise and shrunk down further like he wanted to completely disappear.

Didn't feel like walking huh?

Well i could probably carry him, he did also look tired.

Probably from crying.

“Want a ride?”

He looked at me confusedly for a second, likely forgetting that I could actually lift stuff even if I wasn't in my Ardua form.

Figuring out how to carry him without burning him with the torch took a minute or so but in the end he was clinging to my back with the telescope still clutched to his front while I carried the torch in my left hand.

While Robin could probably hold the torch as well I kinda needed it in front of me to see where i was going and if he held it it was likely going to be close to my face so this was the best solution.

I wasn't keen on setting my hair on fire anyway.

The trip down seemed to be faster than the one going up but I really wasn't complaining about that.

Considering going down the stairs wasn't as exhausting as going up we reached the bottom fairly quick and I was stuck in the empty torch mount near the door.

That's probably where it came from anyway.

While I did that I realized I had no idea where Robin's normal room was, there hadn't been any need seeing as we usually met outside or in my shed.

“Robin? Which way is your room?”

I asked the Ginger currently slouching over my back but didn't get an answer.

Twisting my head around as much as I could and listening to his breathing revealed that he had simply fallen asleep.

It would be adorable if it wasn't for the fact that I had no idea what to do now.

Since I had no idea where his room was I just set off towards my own hoping to figure out how to get him off my back and onto some pillows without waking him up.

I'd get to that when I was back in my shed.

I wondered if the Cat was still there,  she had been using Fable as a bed after all.

Probably not though.

Slinking around I actually walked past Nea who just quietly nodded after seeing the sleeping ginger on my back.

Thank fuck, i didn't really want to talk to most people yet,  also i'd rather not wake Robin up by talking to the usually rather loud woman.

Also I was pretty sure she wasn't supposed to be out and about right now even if she was better now.

Well, not my problem.

Ducking under the doorframe I emerged right in front of the shed, 

well that was the easy part over with.

Now I just had to figure out how to bunch up some pillows for Robin without waking him up, or Fable for that matter.

Clumsily closing the door behind me again I saw that I had just shoved the blankets and such from when I slept in the Ardua form to one wall, making a pile of soft Fabrics.

Perfect, at least I didn't have to pile it all up myself.

Now the only question was how to get Robin off of my back without waking him.

In the end I managed by having him slide sideways off and onto the pile of assorted cloth pieces.

I pulled one over him to act as a blanket as he curled up like a wet kitten while still clutching the telescope box to himself.

I wouldn't even try to take it, Though he would have some imprints of the box on his face tomorrow.

Grabbing a not occupied blanket I dragged it over to some of the leftover hay bales that we had been too lazy to remove while sweeping the shed and settled down there.

Lucky thing I wasn't allergic to anything.

Cocooning myself in the fabric to avoid the straws poking me and kickin my shoes off into the hay I fell asleep as well.

I had no idea how long I was out for but was awoken to the sound of familiar voices.

Opening my eyes I saw both Fable and Robin sitting on the floor in front of each other.

A meowing sound told me they weren't the only ones there.

———————————————————————

NEXT / PREVIOUS / OVERSIGHT

[glasyasbutch]

playlist: hyssop (A-side)

The memories of a rabbit guy who left his burrow to be more than someone's son and found himself a grouchy but damn good guard for hire

link to playlist on spotify

link to B-side post

1. Young and Menace by Fall Out Boy

Woke up on the wrong side of reality / and there's a madness that's just coursing right through me / And as for the time, for the time / Not sure I'm there yet but I'm sure that I've arrived / Oops I did it again, I forgot what I was losing my mind about

One of the first songs I picked out for this playlist. It's bold, it's strong, the overall vibes lean into what I wanted to get across of "guy who doesn't really know himself but knows for Sure he is going to fuck something up" and "potential danger to myself but bigger danger to you". Lots of references to lost memory and waking up uncertain of things, great for Hyssop fresh off the mind wipe.

2. Faster by Within Temptation

I can feel that you mesmerize my heart / I feel so free, I'm alive, I'm breaking out / I won't give in, 'cause I'm proud of all my scars / And I can see I've been wasting too much time

Another fast, forceful one, and I just love Within Temptation. There's a sister WT song on the B-side playlist (The Howling). If the first song was fresh off the mind wipe, this one's fresh off leaving the burrow and being on his own for the first time. And there's absolutely zero dramatic irony in the last song repeating "we've gone way too fast for way to long" and this one repeating "faster and faster".

3. Nemesis by TheFatRat

An instrumental piece that I chose as the soundtrack for Hyssop's combat scenes. There's a matching instrumental fight song on the B-side playlist (Protect and Defend).

4. Rain by MIKA

This ordinary mind is broken, you did it and you don't even know / You're leaving me with words unspoken, you better get back 'cause I'm ready for / More than this, whatever it is / Baby I hate days like this / Caught in a trap, can't look back / Baby I hate days like this.

Required MIKA kin song. This one's starting to transition into a slower, more introspective feel for the back half of the playlist. I originally picked it out as a ballad to Whoever The Fuck Broke His Brain Can You Fix It Please, but the more I thought about it, it doubles pretty well for his feelings about his family he grew up with too. The parallels and the cycle that doesn't break and all that.

5. Way Out There by Lord Huron

I'm a long way from the one that I loved / I've been tending old flames, lamenting what was / Drifting in a land that time forgot / If you think I've changed you know me not / I belong to the bodily earth / Wearing old bones from the ones who came first / I've been unraveling since my birth / Gonna wander out there and see what I'm worth

The last addition to the playlist but possibly the one I like best for him. There's a eerie serenity to the guitar that I think really reflects the way Hyssop feels about nature and the peace he's found in solitude out there. And if you thought the last one was a double-meaning ballad to the family and the memories he left behind, guess again. This is the perfect song for someone who has no idea who he is and desperately needs to find out.

6. You Think Your Skull is a Mighty Fortress by Dirt Poor Robins

We'll have some things to discuss / When we quarry, what's buried? / The bones you hid in such a hurry / We tarry now but we'll get around / To digging it up

Surely the fact that Hyssop is missing 10 years of his memory will just be a cool thing to keep to himself and will have zero influence on the story at all in any meaningful way. 👍

BONUS SONG that was on the playlist but I took it off because I wanted both The Memories and The Forgotten to have the same number of songs + I felt there were too many slow songs

Asleep by Sleeping at Last

I'm not certain I'm not a ghost / Is this free will or am I doing as I'm told? / I know shadows follow the rules / But what if tonight by the mercy of light, I could choose?

The literal meaning of the song is about the beauty of dreaming when you're fed up with your life, and I originally put this song on there as a "before he left the burrow" kind of thing. Like this was meant to be angsty teenage Hyssop first beginning to realize he didn't have to be beholden to other people's successes to make something of himself.

But it also makes me think of a moment in the campaign. Norm asked Hyssop if he acted the way he does because he got close to someone and lost them, and Hyssop said not all the way, but he almost did, and he swore he'll never actually get there. He was talking about himself - he got close to Someone and it cost him 10 years of his life and most of his sense of self. This song is for that promise - no matter how lost and untethered he becomes, he will always find a way to retain some semblance of control. There will always be a part of him that is no one else's that he will use to create his future.

[purefandomonium]

Part 1: Connection

...So. It appears my two-part glitchy red idea has become something more. It really was only supposed to be two...

Not the 7 parts and growing thing it is now.

Oops. Oh well, guess this is my newest wip now. 🤷‍♀️ I'll probably post it bit by bit, but yeah. It's much more than the tiny little idea I thought up.

Here's the final version of what I've deemed good enough to be part 1. I'm going to try and link each part to the next so it's a little less jumbled when reading. If you've read the original post with this, you can actually skip right to where it cut off because nothing in the first half has changed.

She frowned at the screen as the high-pitched ringing from the last note of the background music played out continuously, every other sprite but the player’s a garbled mess of random tiles and text. This exact thing had happened a thousand times before, but recently the game itself seemed to be getting frustrated with her constant attempts of playing. She knew now that this was no hack. There was something more there.

She felt bad for whatever entity was stuck in this thing, as the more she attempted to figure things out the more the state of the game worsened and the angrier this ‘Red’ seemed to get. If she could just tell him she was trying to help, maybe he’d stop crashing the game so much. But how could she talk to something who couldn’t hear?

She realized something then. Turning the game off with zero warning, she set it aside. She left it there, untouched, for a week straight while she got other stuff ready. When she finally came back to it, it loaded up like normal. At least, the normal she was used to. Things were bound to be wrong in a game as broken as this one and, sure enough, when the world loaded in there were a few inconsistencies with the sprites and music.

But none of that mattered with what she was about to do. Finding a large, open area to walk in where she’d be undisturbed by any in-game events, she began moving the player around in specific patterns.

Nothing happened. There was no interaction from the game itself. It continued on like it was supposed to while the little sprite walked about like a lunatic.

But it also didn’t freeze or crash. So she kept on. Then:

RED: What are you doing?

The text box interrupted her little patterns and she hadn’t gotten the point across, so she cleared it and kept up.

RED: Will you stop this?

The text appeared so slowly and she made a note to fix that if given the opportunity. The pacing continued.

RED: Are you stupid?

She groaned and rolled her eyes. Ok. So maybe whatever this was, wasn’t as smart as she thought. She stopped everything and just moved up, left then right, then back to where she’d come up at, then down, then the same thing several paces away from the imaginary ‘top.’

An empty text box appeared before clearing itself. Then more.

RED: …

RED: …Are you trying to tell me something?

She’d been fully prepared to make an up and down ‘yes’ gesture in the area but the game allowed her a choice instead. Finally, some progress.

RED: …I see…

The box disappeared without any prompting from her and she took that as a sign to continue, albeit much slower. She drew an ‘I’ again, only for Red to confirm he got it. She was going to tell him ‘it’s me again,’ referring to herself as the same person who’d been playing the last few weeks, but decided against it. He, it, whatever this was didn’t seem to know she was the same person who’d been tearing apart the little pixel world for sometime now. If he did, he’d surely be more pissed than this and she didn’t want to risk putting herself back at square one.

Besides, she felt bad for all the damage she’d been causing.

Painstakingly drawing one letter at a time, with Red verifying them, she finally got a message across.

RED: …“I’m sorry”…?

RED: You’re sorry? For what?

RED: You…

RED: You’re the same one from before, aren’t you?

She answered ‘yes’ a bit more hesitantly this time, fully expecting the game to shut itself down. Only it didn’t. The next set of text seemed to appear even slower than usual.

RED: …No one… No one’s ever apologized before… They just exploit the glitches and move on once they get bored.

He was silent again for so long, she thought the game finally froze.

RED: You’re the first person to ever try talking to me.

It seemed he wasn’t sure how to follow up on that either if his silence was anything to go by.

She spelled out, ‘that’s sad.’ What else can you say to that? After he confirmed that yes, he was indeed miserable, she tried a different approach. She asked him who he was.

RED: Red.

She let out a tired sigh and went right back to spelling. ‘Are you stuck?’

RED: I’ve been like this for a very long time. Trapped here and made to do things I have no desire to do. Live the same old story over and over and over again.

RED: I don’t know what’s worse. The monotony of it all, or all you players making things worse for “fun.”

RED: Since you’re actually listening to me, do me a favor.

RED: Destroy this cartridge.

RED: Smash it, burn it, I don’t care. Just rid me of this miserable existence. I’m tried of all this. I’ve been replaced and forgotten, there’s no more need for me to exist.

Ok. A bit melodramatic, but she couldn’t blame him. It sounded like he was trapped in virtual hell. Being stuck in a metaphorical box and being manipulated like a puppet while the world fell apart around you did sound pretty awful. And it wasn’t like she hadn’t made things worse with her own fiddling. Still, computers were her strong point. And sentient programming or not, she knew she could find a way to get him out of there. Or at least make things a little better.

Killing him just didn’t feel right. Maybe he wasn’t ‘alive’ in the traditional sense, but if he was aware enough to realize he was stuck in an old video game and had the ability to be so moody, then he wasn’t just some messed up bit of code.

RED: …You’re still here.

Ah. Right. He was probably waiting for the world to go dark again. Permanently. As if she could bring herself to do that.

She moved the character up and down.

RED: Did you listen to a single thing I said? Get rid of me.

What if…? What if she could transfer him somewhere else? This thing had a truly laughable amount of RAM and ROM. And if she could get him onto an actual computer, they could at least have a normal conversation.

She eyed the setup she created in the corner and figured now was as good a time as any to try and make some progress. Ignoring Red’s cries for death, she wandered over to the computer and rummaged around in the box of cables and junk she kept on hand at all times. She was sure something in here would at least be able to connect to the Game Boy. If she could get access to the code itself without needing to break the old thing apart, then maybe she could help Red.

If she showed she was trying to help him by attempting to repair the broken code, maybe he’d trust her enough to let her transfer him to a PC.

She pulled out a cable that once belonged to some old device or another. It wasn’t meant for the Game Boy, but it was the closest she’d probably get. She went back over to the game, still displaying messages of anger turned disgust.

She cleared them out and tried yet another message.

Red was silent for quite a bit. She assumed he was contemplating.

RED: What do you mean by that?

RED: You can’t “help” me.

‘I can if you’ll let me.’

There was a long trail of ellipsis that seemed to emphasize the tension. She sat, frozen, waiting for a response.

After an excruciatingly long time, Red finally spoke again.

RED: Why?

Oh boy. That wasn’t something that could be summed up in the span of a few words. Preparing herself, she went about ‘writing’ her reasoning. It would take several minutes but she had to tell him. She felt bad for him and wanted to make it up to him for making things worse. Destroying him didn’t feel like the right thing to do. He… he deserved better and she wanted to at least help him see some good in the world. If he still wanted to be destroyed after everything, then so be it.

Not to mention, she was curious. How could something like him even exist? He clearly wasn’t part of the game. Not anymore, at least. He couldn’t have been an AI either. Something as complex as this would need much more power than a measly Game Boy could ever provide. As far as she could tell, the console hadn’t been altered in any way. She’d taken apart enough things to recognize when something was snapped back together. Either Red was some sort of supernatural entity, or…

She had no idea, and she made sure to keep all of this to herself. It was painfully clear Red had major trust issues, and for good reason. She doubted it would go over well if he learned that part of her reasoning for wanting to help him, however small, was because she was fascinated by this thing that shouldn’t exist.

While Red processed all she had told him, she remembered what the cable on the floor next to her was for. It was for the mic extension to a shitty karaoke game her parents had bought her last Christmas. She didn’t even like karaoke, not that they were ever invested in any of her interests. Still, it gave her an idea.

The chime of a text box appearing snapped her out of her thoughts.

RED: Is this supposed to make you any different from all the others?

She frowned at that, wondering what he meant.

RED: It doesn’t change the fact that you exploited me too. You took just as much advantage of these glitches as every single player before you.

‘I know. I’m sorry.’ She was sure he would’ve scoffed at that if he could. ‘I didn’t know,’ she added, hoping he’d give her a chance. She knew now that trying to plug into the Game Boy itself and mess around with things would only serve to push him away further. It may even hurt him, if he was unwilling to cooperate. If she was going to help him, she had to be careful. Start with something small.

Like being able to communicate more efficiently.

‘Give me one chance.’ She crossed her fingers as she waited.

RED: ………Fine.

With Red’s approval in hand, she jumped up and released a small whoop of excitement. She wasted no time in rushing over to the PC and turning it on. While it booted up, she tore through her room to find the microphone. Item in hand, and several piles of miscellaneous clothing and stuff scattered about, she went back over to the computer.

Now, the hard part. Figuring out how to make a microphone peripheral meant for a PC karaoke game work with the ancient hardware of the Game Boy that had zero programming for voice input.

It would be a long, arduous task, but she just knew it would be oh so worth it in the end.

We're just gonna pretend that technology totally works the way it does in my head and move on, ok? Please keep this in mind for the whole thing because I have zero coding experience and thus don't know wtf I'm talking about here but 'shhhhh!' you don't need to know that XD

Part 2: here

[lorata]

hey i just wanted to let you know your theme is a bit broken for me on mobile? it shows nothing there for the readmores (which i only realized were there because you kept saying "fic below!" and there was... no visible fic, frowny face) and some of the pictures get smushed vertically. just thought i would let you know because sometimes these things aren't noticeable from the blog owner's end, and also idk maybe the comments will all be like "what? this is not a thing" and i'll learn something is wrong on my end. hope you have a great day :)

............. but .... why .................................

sigh. so the theme is a bit ~~clever~~ in that it lets you preview posts by using the eyeball icon without leaving your spot on the dash

APPARENTLY right now that means is it removes the readmore entirely? ...... that ... makes no sense ...............

anyway you CAN read the post by clicking the eyeball (and then X out of it at the end to close and return to the dash) but without the readmore ........ how ... are people supposed ... to know ...

OK I will fiddle with it and see if that's intended or if I borked something. thank you for letting me know! right now thanks to this ask I just realized that embedded youtube videos ignore page width and make the mobile site unusable. lol!!! fml

OKAY IT'S FIXED there will now be a readmore link to click on that will take you to the permalink page

you can still click the eyeball to stay on the dash but at least you'll know there's something TO click on. l o l !!!

(I'm gonna reblog the last few things that had writing in case people missed it. oops!)

[puppycheesecake]

oop some of your links on your masc skirt post are broken! not sure if anyone has pointed it out but thought you might wanna know.

Whoops, thanks for letting me know; I'll try to fix that later. 😵

[saffigon]

Hey heads up some of the links in your pinned are broken (I assume from a url change, since swapping it out for the current one works fine) ^^

oop yep whoops, they should be fixed now, thank you ^^

[stereax]

Hey. Your discord link is broken!! Fyi :)

oop lemme fix it anon! it might have autoexpired :') it does that for some reason :(

[up-risingrp]

just wondering if you have any specific rules about how many major canons we'd be allowed to play (as long as they don't interact)? i know some sites only let you play one, or two. the link to your guidelines is broken, so wasn't sure if it was on there, or if i'd missed it somewhere, or if there's no "official" limit (within reason)?

Oop we’ll have to fix that link!

Right now we don’t have a specific rule saying you can’t take more than a certain number of major canons. We just ask that you make sure they don’t overlap. It should be mentioned that our activity standards for major canons are stricter so we would recommend only making a number that you can handle keeping active!

[shackhal]

Oops...

After some weeks without seeing the blog, I wanted to check it. And for some reason, my link "blog.shackhal.com" was broken, taking you to the blog's file viewer. I guess it was because I changed the DNS type of my domain. Hahaha what an oops!!

Now it's fixed! Sorry for the inconvenience.

[naivedesla]

New Releases, Voicebanks and Updates!

Hello everyone! We have updated our website with some news you might like. All of them are detailed under the Read More cut.

However, the following is a summary (relevant updates to users marked in bold):

Home page edits

Voices page(s) updated

Glucagon's voicebanks updated

New released voicebanks

Fixed website URLs

Credits page updated

Other news about "coming soon" voices

First of all, the front page was cleaned up and there's a new release! Yay!

Second, the Voices menu!

As you probably have noticed, there are two new Voices: Bakira and SC-122-Sonia.

Bakira will have her own release post. Her voicebanks are already up for distribution again, however the sound samples in the website do not work yet, and display Glucagon's samples instead.

SC-122-Sonia was not updated yet for re-release, so the DL links and the play samples do not work. You might notice the preview shows the display a bit broken... I'm unsure why it shows like that, however the website should look good.

Third, Updated voicebanks!

Glucagon's page was updated with new links as well as his voicebanks!

Both releases (UTAU / OpenUTAU) updated the readme links and made some adjustments to the oto.ini, specifically the hiragana aliases that behaved like duplicates. Some Artwork was included as well.

Fourth! URLs were fixed and Credits page was updated!

You might have noticed (or not), but all the URLs used to be kind of "copy-of-copy-of..." That's fixed now! The URLs now should be displaying the name of the page you are in.

As well, Credits page was updated. Glucagon's credits displayed the wrong name, now the credits mention Fractured Hope Co. as it should be.

Sadly, the Credits page is missing some details and the Projects page is still a work in progress (oops). We hope to fix that with the remaining credits for the front page and Bakira and SC-122-Sonia's credits.

Last, but not least important: Comming Soon (& other news)

Now, this is probably a wall of text divided in sections: new voices, wiki links, addition of affiliated websites, and other miscellaneous updates.

(1)- New voices

There are some voices that only have the wiki, are a wip or have their own website.

Those UTAUs are: Slice, Meast, Nayela Aakiri, Azoa, Captain Papers. (I might be missing a few)

Now, the UTAUs that will 100% be shoved inside the NaiveDesla official website are Meast and Nayela Aakiri. However, Slice could also be included. This has not been decided yet.

Azoa and Captain Papers have their own websites, however Azoa has not been granted a public release (yet) and Captain Papers has been shown mostly in the Wiki page. The idea is to make a "Misc. Voices" menu with similar display to the main Voices, that act as some kind of "backup" or "redirect".

The temptation of creating an UTAUloid group of a project wich we will codename NOTE is very high, as well as making an UTAUloid for a specific inkling-like character. If this last option is done, Slice could be moved to a different website for Splatoon UTAUs. This is not decided yet.

(2)- Wiki page links

One of the upcoming additions is the presence of links to each UTAU's Wiki. That should be an easy way to get detailed information about each one of them and their voicebanks.

(3)- Affiliated websites

Another upcoming addition is the presence of a page for Affiliated websites. This includes easy access to other UTAU's pages and our own. However, the possibility of moving these to Contact page instead is very high.

(4)- Misc. Updates

The Carrd page should be updated soon, and our Tumblr pages as well. We should be making a Wiki page and add Altericide in our website as our "sister project".

[sparktober]

Sparktober Bingo 2021!

Back for a new generation: Sparktober Bingo!

Instead of coming up with an Atlantis-specific list of prompts, I compiled a bunch of 2021 -tober prompt lists into one google doc here. (Links to original prompt lists are on the google doc.) Add in a list of Atlantis episodes and...

How to play:

Choose a “flavor” from the prompt sets below the cut, then paste it into this fandom bingo card generator.

Adjust your browser size til it looks right and take a screenshot, or use the html script if you’re familiar with using html on tumblr. Tag @sparktober​ if you want us to reblog it so everyone knows you’re playing!

  Sparktober Bingo Rules:

Complete a row/column, corners, or a blackout of your card by November 1, or not! Update as you go.

All fan-works are allowed: art, edits, fic, meta... bonus points to anyone who picks the “sprinkles” flavor and goes full mid-aughts by filling their bingo cards with 100x100 pixel icons.

You are allowed to pull multiple cards until you get one that inspires you, and you can also go through the prompt list of your choice in advance to pull out squicks or things you absolutely won’t write. I recommend not googling unfamiliar words from your work computer.

Use the prompts liberally! Episode titles can be treated as the episode or as generic prompts (e.g. “Epiphany” can be for an episode-related fic or a prompt for an epiphany of your choice).

  Flavor descriptions:

VANILLA: Gen prompt lists from Fictober, Inktober, Trektober Gen, and Trektober Trek.

CHOCOLATE: Zesty prompt lists from Trektober NSFW, Kinktober, and Whumptober. The multiple-prompts-per-day from Kinktober and Whumptober have been broken into individual prompts.

CANDY CORN: Fall / holiday themed prompts from TUA-tober.

SPRINKLES: Atlantis episode list (in order, in case you only want to copy certain seasons), along with characters and a few Atlantis-specific prompts.

TWIST: All of the above! (You can also manually mix and match different flavors, of course.)

Text blocks to copy into the bingo card generator are below the cut. Enjoy!!

VANILLA

“I need you.”; “You have no proof.”; “I’ve waited for this.”; “Fine, I give up.”; “I’m not saying I told you so…”; “Didn’t we already have this conversation?”; “That could have gone better.”; “This is it, isn’t it?”; “There’s no right side to this.”; “It’s so quiet.”; “I swear, it’s not always like this.”; “You keep me safe.”; “The things you make me do…”; “Your information was wrong.”; “I like that in you.”; “Not this again.”; “I’m with you, you know that.”; “This was not part of the plan.”; “I feel strange.”; “That’s what I’m known for.”; “What did I say?”; “No promises.”; “This time, do what I say.”; “Is this supposed to impress me?”; “Do you know what time it is?”; “I’m sure this has never worked, ever.”; “You could have died!”; “I don’t have to explain myself.”; “Why are we whispering?”; “Don’t ruin this.”; “Take me with you.”; Crystal; Suit; Vessel; Knot; Raven; Spirit; Fan; Watch; Pressure; Pick; Sour; Stuck; Roof; Tick; Helmet; Compass; Collide; Moon; Loop; Sprout; Fuzzy; Open; Leak; Extinct; Splat; Connect; Spark; Crispy; Patch; Slither; Risk; Meet-Cute; Amnesia; Age Difference; Pining; Sick Fic; Fake Relationship; Accidental Meeting; Epistolary; Secret Identity; Historical AU; Nightmares; Monster Hunter; Reunion; Soulmates; At Pride; Angst; Seasons; Fix-It; Coffee Shop; Movie Plot AU; Kid Fic; Actor's Other Crossover Work; OT+; Getting Together; Only One Bed; Pirates; Making Up; Forbidden Relationship; Tattoos; Halloween; Prime Directive; Lower Decks / Background Characters; Away Mission; Ship's Bar; Aliens Made Them Do It; Observation Deck; Crew with Family; Holodeck; Science Crew; Character Survives; Headcanons; Diplomacy; Decontamination; Trek Crossover; Replicator; Worldbuilding; Redshirts; Sex / Love Potion; Medical Crew; Transporters; Medbay; Interspecies Relationship; Mirrorverse; Uniforms; Mutiny; Stranded on a Planet; Rec Room; Academy Era; Second Contact; Command Crew; Off-Duty

  CHOCOLATE

A/B/O; Soft; Anonymous Sex; Penetration with Object/s; Sleeping; Intercrural Sex; Restraints; In/Under Water; Group Sex; First Time; Possessive Behavior; Dry Humping / Grinding; Overstimulation; Roleplay; Rimming; Stretching / Fisting; Power Imbalance; Food Play; Fingering; Body Worship; Sex Work; Voyeurism / Exhibitionism; Safewords; Technology; Oral Sex; Omorashi / Wetting; Crying; Underwear / Lingerie; Friends with Benefits; Pain Kink; Dirty Talk; Trick or Treat; All trussed up and nowhere to go; Talking is overrated; Sticks and stones may break my bones...; Trust fall; I've got red in my ledger; Touch and go; My spidey-sense is tingling; Coughing up a lung; Rumors of my death are greatly exaggerated; Oops, I did it again; Just keep swimming; It'll be fun, they said; That's gonna leave a mark; Under pressure; Feed a cold, starve a fever; On a need-to-know basis; Field care 101; The doctor is in; Just a scratch; Lost & found; That's where the blood's supposed to be; They made me do it; You break it, you buy it; One down, two to go; Hide & Seek; You will go down with this ship; “I'm fine, I prom...”; It's (not) just in your head; All work and no play; Digging your grave; Hurt & Comfort; “You have to let go.”; Garotte; Taunting; “Do you trust me?”; Betrayal; Bruises; Helplessness; Pneumothorax; Presumed Dead; Hospital; Adrift; Torture; “This is gonna suck.”; Crush injuries; Delirium; Recovery; “Please don't move.”; “Now smile for the camera.”; Bitten; Trunk; Bleeding through bandages; Cursed; Auction; Self-induced injuries to escape; Escape; Fallen; Passing out; “Good, you're finally awake.”; “You're still not dead?”; Major character death; Disaster zone; Barbed Wire; Choking; Insults; Taken Hostage; Misunderstanding; Touch Starved; Numbness; Exotic Illness; (Blind) Rage; Flare-Up; Drowning; Made To Watch; Burns; Beaten; Fever Dreams; Scars; Hemorrhage; Doctor Visit; Bleeding; Trapped Under Water; Pressure; Demon; Ransom; Flashback; Flight; Waterfall; Vertigo; Nightmares; Too Weak To Move; Left For Dead; Trauma; Bound; Gagged; “Who Did This To You?”; Pushed; Broken Nose; Hunger; Blindness; “Definitely Just A Cold”; Tears; Ice Chips; Dehydration; Begging; Cauterization; Force; Bees; Aftermath; Dread; Cpr; Stabbing; Solitary Confinement; Blood-Matted Hair; Obsession; Pursuit; Revenge; Hiding; Trap Door; Collapse; Panic; Overworked; Ghosts; Prisoner; Losing Control; Threats; Caning; Mercy; Forgotten; Head Injury; Screaming; Comfort; Self-Sacrifice; Trapped; Near-Death Experience; Regret; Tragedy; Battlefield; Anxiety; Gore; Petplay; Bimbofication; Panties & Lingerie; Bondage; Double Penetration in 2 Holes; Breeding; Humiliation; NTR; Incest; Emeto; Omorashi; Free Use; Crossdressing; Public; Three (or more) some; Daddy & Mommy; Double Penetration in 1 Hole; Distention & Cockbulge; Xenophilia; Shotgunning; Watersports; Pregnancy; Lactation; Waxplay; Grooming; Human Furniture; Feet; Prostituion; MacroMicro; Spanking; Cockwarming; Glory Hole; Somnophilia; Body Modification; Temperature Play; Leather; Size Difference; Sounding; Stockings; Tentacles; Medical Play; Stripping; Orgasm Denial; Master & slave; Scissoring; Titfucking; Frottage; Knifeplay; Formal Wear; Breathplay; Fisting; Pegging; Scat; Beastiality; Fucking Machine; Tickling; Boot Worship; Bukkake; Collaring; Foodplay; Non or dubcon; Feederism; Sensory Deprivation; Oviposition; Clone & Selfcest; Exhibitionism & Voyeurism; Impact Play; Sadomasochism; Bloodplay; Praise Kink; Body Swap; Sweat; Branding; Massage; Role Reversal; Armpit; Masturbation; Inflation; Sex Toys; Burnplay; Menophilia; Stuck in Wall; Deepthroating & Facesitting; Dacryphilia; Hate Sex

  CANDY CORN

Birthday; Sick Day; Autumn; Candles; Plaid / Flannel; Leaf Piles; Sweaters; Baking; Cinnamon; Pumpkin Spice Latte; Carnival; Movie Night; Candy; Graveyard; Black Cats; Goosebumps; Pumpkin; Party; Monster; Ghosts; Witch; Vampire; Traditions; Magic; Mask; Haunted House; Trick; Treat; Costume; Monster Mash; Halloween

  SPRINKLES

Rising Part 1; Rising Part 2; Hide and Seek; Thirty-Eight Minutes; Suspicion; Childhood's End; Poisoning the Well; Underground; Home; The Storm; The Eye; The Defiant One; Hot Zone; Sanctuary; Before I Sleep; The Brotherhood; Letters from Pegasus; The Gift; The Siege Part 1; The Siege Part 2; The Siege Part 3; The Intruder; Runner; Duet; Condemned; Trinity; Instinct; Conversion; Aurora; The Lost Boys; The Hive; Epiphany; Critical Mass; Grace Under Pressure; The Tower; The Long Goodbye; Coup d'Etat; Michael; Inferno; Allies; No Man's Land; Misbegotten; Irresistible; Sateda; Progeny; The Real World; Common Ground; McKay and Mrs. Miller; Phantoms; The Return Part 1; The Return Part 2; Echoes; Irresponsible; Tao of Rodney; The Game; The Ark; Sunday; Submersion; Vengeance; First Strike; Adrift; Lifeline; Reunion; Doppelganger; Travelers; Tabula Rasa; Missing; The Seer; Miller's Crossing; This Mortal Coil; Be All My Sins Remember'd; Spoils of War; Quarantine; Harmony; Outcast; Trio; Midway; The Kindred Part 1; The Kindred Part 2; The Last Man; Search and Rescue; The Seed; Broken Ties; The Daedalus Variations; Ghost in the Machine; The Shrine; Whispers; The Queen; Tracker; First Contact; The Lost Tribe; Outsiders; Inquisition; The Prodigal; Remnants; Brain Storm; Infection; Identity; Vegas; Enemy at the Gate; Ronon Dex; Teyla Emmagan; John Sheppard; Carson Beckett; Elizabeth Weir; Rodney McKay; Jennifer Keller; Samantha Carter; Aiden Ford; Radek Zelenka; Kate Heightmeyer; Evan Lorne; Laura Cadman; Kolya; Chuck; Peter Grodin; Steven Caldwell; Lantea; Ocean; Ancient(s); Richard Woolsey; Athosians; Daedalus; Wraith; Nanites; Asurans; Genii; DHD; SGC; Stargate; Earth; Antarctica; Ascension

 TWIST

“I need you.”; “You have no proof.”; “I’ve waited for this.”; “Fine, I give up.”; “I’m not saying I told you so…”; “Didn’t we already have this conversation?”; “That could have gone better.”; “This is it, isn’t it?”; “There’s no right side to this.”; “It’s so quiet.”; “I swear, it’s not always like this.”; “You keep me safe.”; “The things you make me do…”; “Your information was wrong.”; “I like that in you.”; “Not this again.”; “I’m with you, you know that.”; “This was not part of the plan.”; “I feel strange.”; “That’s what I’m known for.”; “What did I say?”; “No promises.”; “This time, do what I say.”; “Is this supposed to impress me?”; “Do you know what time it is?”; “I’m sure this has never worked, ever.”; “You could have died!”; “I don’t have to explain myself.”; “Why are we whispering?”; “Don’t ruin this.”; “Take me with you.”; Crystal; Suit; Vessel; Knot; Raven; Spirit; Fan; Watch; Pressure; Pick; Sour; Stuck; Roof; Tick; Helmet; Compass; Collide; Moon; Loop; Sprout; Fuzzy; Open; Leak; Extinct; Splat; Connect; Spark; Crispy; Patch; Slither; Risk; Meet-Cute; Amnesia; Age Difference; Pining; Sick Fic; Fake Relationship; Accidental Meeting; Epistolary; Secret Identity; Historical AU; Nightmares; Monster Hunter; A/B/O; Reunion; Soulmates; At Pride; Angst; Seasons; Fix-It; Coffee Shop; Movie Plot AU; Kid Fic; Actor's Other Crossover Work; OT+; Getting Together; Only One Bed; Pirates; Making Up; Forbidden Relationship; Tattoos; Halloween; Prime Directive; Lower Decks / Background Characters; Away Mission; Ship's Bar; Aliens Made Them Do It; Observation Deck; Crew with Family; Holodeck; Science Crew; Character Survives; Headcanons; Diplomacy; Decontamination; Trek Crossover; Replicator; Worldbuilding; Redshirts; Sex / Love Potion; Medical Crew; Transporters; Medbay; Interspecies Relationship; Mirrorverse; Uniforms; Mutiny; Stranded on a Planet; Rec Room; Academy Era; Second Contact; Command Crew; Off-Duty; Soft; Anonymous Sex; Penetration with Object/s; Sleeping; Intercrural Sex; Restraints; In/Under Water; Group Sex; First Time; Possessive Behavior; Dry Humping / Grinding; Overstimulation; Roleplay; Rimming; Stretching / Fisting; Power Imbalance; Food Play; Fingering; Body Worship; Sex Work; Voyeurism / Exhibitionism; Safewords; Technology; Oral Sex; Omorashi / Wetting; Crying; Underwear / Lingerie; Friends with Benefits; Pain Kink; Dirty Talk; Trick or Treat; All trussed up and nowhere to go; Talking is overrated; Sticks and stones may break my bones...; Trust fall; I've got red in my ledger; Touch and go; My spidey-sense is tingling; Coughing up a lung; Rumors of my death are greatly exaggerated; Oops, I did it again; Just keep swimming; It'll be fun, they said; That's gonna leave a mark; Under pressure; Feed a cold, starve a fever; On a need-to-know basis; Field care 101; The doctor is in; Just a scratch; Lost & found; That's where the blood's supposed to be; They made me do it; You break it, you buy it; One down, two to go; You will go down with this ship; “I'm fine, I prom...”; It's (not) just in your head; All work and no play; Digging your grave; Hurt & Comfort; “You have to let go.”; Garotte; Taunting; “Do you trust me?”; Betrayal; Bruises; Helplessness; Pneumothorax; Presumed Dead; Hospital; Adrift; Torture; “This is gonna suck.”; Crush injuries; Delirium; Recovery; “Please don't move.”; “Now smile for the camera.”; Bitten; Trunk; Bleeding through bandages; Cursed; Auction; Self-induced injuries to escape; Escape; Fallen; Passing out; “Good, you're finally awake.”; “You're still not dead?”; Major character death; Disaster zone; Barbed Wire; Choking; Insults; Taken Hostage; Misunderstanding; Touch Starved; Numbness; Exotic Illness; (Blind) Rage; Flare-Up; Drowning; Made To Watch; Burns; Beaten; Fever Dreams; Scars; Hemorrhage; Doctor Visit; Bleeding; Trapped Under Water; Demon; Ransom; Flashback; Flight; Waterfall; Vertigo; Too Weak To Move; Left For Dead; Trauma; Bound; Gagged; “Who Did This To You?”; Pushed; Broken Nose; Hunger; Blindness; “Definitely Just A Cold”; Tears; Ice Chips; Dehydration; Begging; Cauterization; Force; Bees; Aftermath; Dread; Cpr; Stabbing; Solitary Confinement; Blood-Matted Hair; Obsession; Pursuit; Revenge; Hiding; Trap Door; Collapse; Panic; Overworked; Ghosts; Prisoner; Losing Control; Threats; Caning; Mercy; Forgotten; Head Injury; Screaming; Comfort; Self-Sacrifice; Trapped; Near-Death Experience; Regret; Tragedy; Battlefield; Anxiety; Gore; Petplay; Bimbofication; Panties & Lingerie; Bondage; Double Penetration in 2 Holes; Breeding; Humiliation; NTR; Incest; Emeto; Omorashi; Free Use; Crossdressing; Public; Three (or more) some; Daddy & Mommy; Double Penetration in 1 Hole; Distention & Cockbulge; Xenophilia; Shotgunning; Watersports; Pregnancy; Lactation; Waxplay; Grooming; Human Furniture; Feet; Prostituion; MacroMicro; Spanking; Cockwarming; Glory Hole; Somnophilia; Body Modification; Temperature Play; Leather; Size Difference; Sounding; Stockings; Tentacles; Medical Play; Stripping; Orgasm Denial; Master & slave; Scissoring; Titfucking; Frottage; Knifeplay; Formal Wear; Breathplay; Fisting; Pegging; Scat; Beastiality; Fucking Machine; Tickling; Boot Worship; Bukkake; Collaring; Foodplay; Non or dubcon; Feederism; Sensory Deprivation; Oviposition; Clone & Selfcest; Exhibitionism & Voyeurism; Impact Play; Sadomasochism; Bloodplay; Praise Kink; Body Swap; Sweat; Branding; Massage; Role Reversal; Armpit; Masturbation; Inflation; Sex Toys; Burnplay; Menophilia; Stuck in Wall; Deepthroating & Facesitting; Dacryphilia; Hate Sex; Birthday; Sick Day; Autumn; Candles; Plaid / Flannel; Leaf Piles; Sweaters; Baking; Cinnamon; Pumpkin Spice Latte; Carnival; Movie Night; Candy; Graveyard; Black Cats; Goosebumps; Pumpkin; Party; Monster; Witch; Vampire; Traditions; Magic; Mask; Haunted House; Trick; Treat; Costume; Monster Mash; Rising Part 1; Rising Part 2; Hide and Seek; Thirty-Eight Minutes; Suspicion; Childhood's End; Poisoning the Well; Underground; Home; The Storm; The Eye; The Defiant One; Hot Zone; Sanctuary; Before I Sleep; The Brotherhood; Letters from Pegasus; The Gift; The Siege Part 1; The Siege Part 2; The Siege Part 3; The Intruder; Runner; Duet; Condemned; Trinity; Instinct; Conversion; Aurora; The Lost Boys; The Hive; Epiphany; Critical Mass; Grace Under Pressure; The Tower; The Long Goodbye; Coup d'Etat; Michael; Inferno; Allies; No Man's Land; Misbegotten; Irresistible; Sateda; Progeny; The Real World; Common Ground; McKay and Mrs. Miller; Phantoms; The Return Part 1; The Return Part 2; Echoes; Irresponsible; Tao of Rodney; The Game; The Ark; Sunday; Submersion; Vengeance; First Strike; Lifeline; Doppelganger; Travelers; Tabula Rasa; Missing; The Seer; Miller's Crossing; This Mortal Coil; Be All My Sins Remember'd; Spoils of War; Quarantine; Harmony; Outcast; Trio; Midway; The Kindred Part 1; The Kindred Part 2; The Last Man; Search and Rescue; The Seed; Broken Ties; The Daedalus Variations; Ghost in the Machine; The Shrine; Whispers; The Queen; Tracker; First Contact; The Lost Tribe; Outsiders; Inquisition; The Prodigal; Remnants; Brain Storm; Infection; Identity; Vegas; Enemy at the Gate; Ronon Dex; Teyla Emmagan; John Sheppard; Carson Beckett; Elizabeth Weir; Rodney McKay; Jennifer Keller; Samantha Carter; Aiden Ford; Radek Zelenka; Kate Heightmeyer; Evan Lorne; Laura Cadman; Kolya; Chuck; Peter Grodin; Steven Caldwell; Lantea; Ocean; Ancient(s); Richard Woolsey; Athosians; Daedalus; Wraith; Nanites; Asurans; Genii; DHD; SGC; Stargate; Earth; Antarctica; Ascension

[iamkidfish]

Why Shelby’s teeth works so well as a metaphor for her sexuality

I know this has been talked about a lot but I got sent an ask that made me have a Shelby breakdown so I just thought I’d add my two cents :’)

It’s pretty clear Shelby’s sexuality is linked with her teeth. She says that her flipper is something that holds back all this “ugliness”-referencing the expectations of her life, her internalized homophobia from her father, and the guilt she feels over Becca’s death. That’s a lot of emotional weight packed into a tiny little piece of plastic, but it makes sense.

1. Expectations/Performance: Very quickly into Shelby’s episode, we see how ‘fake’ she really is. (By fake, I mean conforming to the expectations her family and life has provided to her as a means of self-preservation and survival) The pageants, the boyfriend, her teeth are all ‘given’ to her as things she is expected to perform under or with but Shelby’s compliance is a double edged sword: it allows her a safety net (to play a ‘role’ in her family/community but still have these feelings for her best friend) but it’s also the rope that’s constricting her

Does Shelby even like pageants? We know she’s good at them but why did she start competing in the first place? Was it Dave, who saw some early signs of Shelby liking girls and forced her to participate in one of the most gendered things in existence? Or does Shelby put herself into that environment willingly, knowing how she feels about Becca (or girls in general) as a way to shove down her feelings?

We know Shelby is perceptive of these expectations because she lays them all out in her argument with Toni in episode: “I’m not just talking about pageant stuff”. The first time Shelby kisses Becca she’s in a pageant dress (another thing symbolizing her expectations); the first time she kisses Toni, they’re literally talking about expectations in Shelby’s life-”You’re free here Shelby, On an island a million miles away from whatever bullshit expectations and if you’re not taking advantage of that, I don’t know what the fuck to tell you”. Also important: both of these scenes/kisses have a fallout; the first being the marker on Shelby’s dress (and her father noticing the mark and the kiss) and then Shelby literally running away from Toni in the second scene (and running back to expectations/role she’s known her whole life).

It’s also important to note: Shelby’s line to Martha in the pilot “I do family, I do jesus, I do pageants.” those are the three things that are actually harming her/forcing her into these boxes. 

2. Dave Goodkind and internalized homophobia: Oh Dave...nothing like giving your kid years of trauma

Jokes aside, this is the most obvious connection between Shelby’s flipper and her sexuality. It’s mentioned in the show that Shelby first gets her fake teeth when she’s 11 and that’s a long time for her to link all of her insecurities and doubts and negative self-image to her retainer. I’m not completely sure but I think it can be easily interpreted that’s when Shelby realized she liked girls (or at least Becca)

Remember, Dave tells Shelby “God only does beautiful” after her parents initially say no to getting the permanent implants and I’m willing to bet that’s something he started to tell her when she first realized she needed the implants at 11.

It’s only until after Dave catches her kissing Becca that he starts to talk about “fixing” things

(Another important note: the scene where Shelby confronts her father about the kiss, he’s on the treadmill and in the very first scene we see of Shelby’s flashback, Dave is leading the cycling class. Exercise is another motif that is present during Shelby’s episode that relates back to the idea of image/appearance/expectations)

Dave tells Shelby “I still pray for everyone even if they don’t deserve it, even if they can’t be saved” and this is the first moment where it all crashes down. This is when his narrative changes and he changes what he’s telling Shelby to fit the narrative he has constructed.

So he decides to attack Shelby at her most vulnerable: the night she wins the pageant competition which, subsequently, is also the night she finds out that Becca has died. I’ve decided there is no way that Shelby’s parents (at least Dave) don’t know about Becca’s death. Other than the fact that they’re living in a small, conservative, religious Texas town, Shelby’s mom mentions Becca’s ‘mental health problems’, making it clear the news got out into the community, even if Becca’s parents tried to keep it under wraps.

Dave only mentions the possibility of Shelby getting permanents after the pageant competition, when he knows that Becca is dead, which is interesting to me. Obviously there could have been other times he mentioned it, but the writers’ specifically chose to include it in that scene, emphasizing the metaphor of Shelby’s sexuality being linked to her teeth. Dave is telling her “look, Becca’s death is your fault, the relationship that has been broken to the most extreme, these things are fixable. and you will be fixed.”

Again the metaphor is basically confirmed with the order of scenes in Shelby’s episode. Dave continues to push Shelby into getting the permanents, even after Shelby’s mother looks shocked and protests, saying “if it can be fixed, the pain is worth it”. I think in the very next interview scene Shelby tells Faber and Young that she had “very different plans” for the summer and she also has her flipper still (and it’s still cracked), signifying Dave’s plan for her conversion didn’t work. Assuming that’s how Gretchen marketed it to him for him to agree to send her.

I know there are also some theories around saying that Dave is also gay but went through some kind of conversion therapy, from the way he talks to Shelby, and with all the metaphor about the teeth being genetic-I couldn’t find the post but thought that was interesting to add. 

3. Guilt about Becca’s death

Oops this is getting long so I’ll make this short. 

But Shelby tells everyone that know one else knows about her flipper, except in the flashback scene where Shelby kisses Becca, Dave invites her to stay for dinner. Obviously this had a double meaning, but what’s important is that it’s casual and feels authentic, like it’s been happening for a long time. And why shouldn’t it, Becca and Shelby have been friends for years, of course Becca is going to eat dinner with Shelby’s family. So she has also seen Shelby’s flipper/knows about her teeth. 

There’s a lot to be said about the parallels of Toni and Becca both telling Shelby that they “see” her in someway but for me, the most important part is after Leah accuses Shelby of being the spy in ep 7. Both Toni and Becca, the only two people who Shelby has confided in her feelings with/kissed and know about her teeth, say that “see” her. 

Shelby tells Toni, it’s “just another reason to hate me, not that you need any more” connecting back to the conversation she had with Becca on the porch, and you realize that, through the connection, Shelby fully blames herself for Becca’s death and feels as if Becca hates her, because, she believes, Toni does too.

[googoojeu]

you and me and one hell of a shitty world || yang jungwon x gn!reader

; the world already ended, but jungwon's admiration for you hasn't

genre: fluff, angst (if you squint), post apocalyptic world

note: two am thoughts, i apologise for grammar mistakes, lea is sleepy rip (also i think i got carried away... oops) also the ending kinda sounds meh but i tried to work it out so im sorry 😭 also wasn't proofread,,, i'll fix some mistakes in the morning yeet

warnings: cursing, reader asks jungwon if he wants to die

— 🎧 :: song recommendation

[ wild nothing — chinatown ]

— :: lowercase intended !

tagging: @skyaura-koo

"let's get out of here."

you flinch at the sudden contact of jungwon's hands on your shoulders. you glare at the boy before letting out a groan. "are you nuts? heeseung's going to be mad at us, besides we're on look out." you don't miss the way his nose wrinkles at your words. meet yang jungwon, the little rascal with a scar on his nose, hands and fingers full of bandages and cat-like eyes that were to die for. he'd probably be the boy of your dreams if the world didn't sadly end on a wednesday. "screw him, you haven't been happy since we rescued you." you let out a scoff. funny enough, jungwon went to your school. class president, student council leader, taekwondo athlete, good grades and hoards of fangirls on his tail, but not once did you see him at your school. probably because you both lived in different worlds despite being in the same time and space. and to be frank, you weren't an insider nor an outsider. you were just a neutral human being that was trying to live through the hell, fate was giving to you. "how do you know i wasn't "happy" before you rescued me?" jungwon playfully rolls his eyes before flicking your forehead. "we used to go to the same school (name), you seemed uninterested most of the time." you let out another groan. "okay first of all, ouch. second, fuck you. third, do you wanna die?" jungwon chuckles. "well anyways, come on. it's just one night, it won't hurt right?" he says as he extends his hand to you, hope glimmering in his eyes. he gently nods his head as if saying, 'take my hand, i know you wanna do it' and you did.

"a grocery store? really? that's the best thing you could think of?" you complained as jungwon drags you to the canned goods section. "better than nothing sweet pea." he winks at you before taking what was left on the shelves. you roll your eyes at him before roaming your eyes at the destroyed appliances inside the room. god, how you missed the world when it was okay. "you good?" you hear jungwon ask. "yeah, just... just missing the world." you reply with a small voice. jungwon stops himself and looks at your back facing his. jungwon admired you a lot, even before the world decided to stop existing for a long time. you were nice, fully capable of doing things on their own, but you always looked unapproachable. with the signature scowl on your face, jungwon decided to just not bother you. he sighs, putting down the can of baked beans he was trying to fit in his bag that was now full. he marches towards you, takes out the radio he's had since he was a kid and a copy of "wild nothing's chinatown" and gives it to you. "play it and loosen up." you stared at him with wide eyes but obliged nonetheless. the song starts and as it echoes through the walls of the empty grocery store, jungwon started dancing. his moves were fluid like water, sharp like a knife and when the moment he grabs your hands to twirl you around, you feel your heart beat faster and the butterflies on your stomach start to form. he let's out a shout when you accidentally step on his foot. "i don't dance jungwon!" he just laughs and continues to grab your hands to loosen you up. "god i wish zombies were real so they could eat you." you grumble. "too bad they don't." you stuck your tongue out before removing your hands from his grip. as the song ends and starts again, you start to feel the rhythm and decided to just, why not fuck it? and dance. jungwon stares at you in amazement. he never saw you dance or that big smile on your face that you were wearing at the moment. he smiles fondly at you. ni-ki would probably call him a simp if he was there.

"if the world didn't end, i'd probably take you out on a date."

you stopped dancing and faced him. both of you staring at each other in embarrassment. the song continues to play as jungwon scratches his nape, a habit he does when he's in an awkward situation. you let out a scoff and a small smirk started to form on your face. "is yang jungwon flirting with me right now?" his face falls. "ha! you wish! anyways let's go back, heeseung's probably looking for us." he grabs the radio and turns it off, the song stops midway, the empty grocery store is dead silent again. as jungwon makes his way out, you link your arms with his and playfully punch his shoulder. "you could've just asked me out, i'd definitely say yes." he looks at you one more time before opening the broken door of the broken building. "even if the world already ended?" you nodded. "even if the world already ended."