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#and honestly after talking about it we went back to not talking
nthspecialll · 3 days
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Hiii! I love all your character analysis posts and theories so much, and was wondering if you have done any theories about where the gang was before Blackwater, by chance? I think I saw a post recently mentioning Montana but I can't for the life of me remember if it was you who posted it or not! 😅
But I've wondered about their locations before RDR2 a lot and would love to hear your thoughts about it. I remember reading a very early page in Arthur's journal about how they were in the Northen Grizzlies? But apart from that I can't remember anything else about locations, if there were any mentioned. And I'm sorry if you have done a post like this already, it's just a little piece of the backstory I'd like to hear theories about 😊
I have not talked about it but I definetely can! Also thank you for liking my stuff!!
Well, firstly, some places that exist in real life does not exist in red dead and those are the places on the map. Texas is New Austin, New Orleans is Saint Denis and Luisiana is Lemoyne, meanwhile Californa and New York does exist in game, meaning we can't completely be sure what places exist unless they are directly mentioned.
Firstly, we know they have been in Chicago, that is where Dutch and Hosea met! Then in 1877 the pair went to Kettering, Ohio, where they scammed 300$ out of the residents, later that year we know that they met Arthur in the Northern states somewhere, which could also be Montana! We do not know more than it was someplace in the North.
We also know some time before they met Arthur, they went to Blackwater once but exactly when we do not know.
In 1885 we know they were in Illinois, saving and picking up John Marston and two years later they robbed their first bank Lee and Hoyt, which we do not know where is.
But between then and 1898, they robbed 36 banks across the frontier as stated by Ross in rdr1, which is where we get the famous "We were told there was a price when we reached 50." The wiki page of the VDL gang does say they came to Montana in 1898 but they won't give me source to confirm it, which is a little annoying, but just mentioning it.
We know at some point between 1893 and 1898, after Bill joining the gang, they went to Canada, him, Arthur and Uncle robbing a bank together.
We also know that for a while they would return to the same places for Arthur's romances. Both with Eliza, where he could pop by every few months and for Mary, whom they at least returned to after 1894 when Abigail joined, and before the deaths of Annabelle and Bessie.
Either way, now we come to the fun parts, around winter 1898, the gang was up in what is called the Northern Grizzles, we only have access to the western (Around Mount Hagen) and Eastern (O'Creagh's Run), so I would assume that the Northen are outside the map, probably up above the Wapiti Reservation somewhere.
They traveled down the "Western Foothill of the mountians", not sure what road they took as it could be one off map, which I would honestly guess, probably traveling around the cold of Colter and coming in from left side of the map. Either way, they most likely ended up somewhere down by and Big Valley, which can match up with the fact that Arthur mentions that life was good and food was easy to find. That area does have a lot of easy food access and so forth.
Now I have seen a few people say Dutch met Micah in Strawberry, which is honestly very fair assumption, it matches up with a lot, but a simple fact is forgotten, Strawberry does not have a bar, which is where they met.
I would say that Micah most likely had been in Strawb and done, whatever business he had with Slim and Martha (I believe their names were), and traveled up and out of map where he met Dutch and then decided to join them back down.
Afterwards they traveled down to Blackwater where they "hid in plain sight" right outside town as Arthur says he does not like being so close to the town, and considering how close they were to Valentine, I would guess they camped at the ledges where Charles and Javier hides when going to find Sean, either there or the other side of the town.
Blackwater Camp:
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But even though they were camped so close to down, Arthur funnily enough still stayed in town from time to time. It does however not seem that they were settled there or in Big Valley for very long, as Arthur also says that they have been running more than normally those weeks.
Now we get to a bit that confuses me because suddenly the group goes from the southern part of the map down in Blackwater, to suddenly appearing up by Spider Grove by Colter, and Arthur mentions that they headed "east over the Grizzlies" so they went west from Blackwater, out of the map, and then up North only to go east again. Not to mention that it seems they did it in a fairly short time, they haven't had proper time to talk about what happened, they were still shook, Davey was not yet dead from a gut wound and Jenny was burried not far from where we first see the gang?
See that is a little confusing, but I hope that answers your question! I had a lot of fun answering it at least, rereading Arthur's journal and all.
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mygfisprentiss · 3 days
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I want to be close to you
what if Casey was never censured, Alex came back in season 7 and they had to work together? -
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Watching from the doorway Alex deeply admired Casey, she seemed so graceful yet intimidating from a few feet away. She loved the hoarseness of her voice, how her copper hair laid on her shoulders; she wondered how it would feel in her hands.
      She knew it would never happen - could never happen; they were barely friends, colleagues at the most, Casey didn’t even call her “Alex” it was always Cabot, or counselor. 
Before Alex even thought of coming back she used to imagine how the squad liked Casey. She’d call Liv asking about the new ADA asking if she was as good as her, as cliche as it sounds Alex missed her friends, she wished she didn’t have to use a burner phone to call Liv; she wanted to drink coffee with colleagues, walk in Central Park, she wanted to be a prosecutor again.
      “Heard we got a new ADA what’s up with Novak?” Fin yelled out as he walked back into the squad room; everyone starts looking around like he was spouting nonsense. “Sergeant where exactly did you hear that?” The captain wondered along with everyone else but no one was ready for who was about to walk in.
    “Alexandra Cabot back from the dead.” 
Alex’s face went white as she walked in the squad room as she heard Stabler, “holy mother of god.”
It felt so nostalgic for Alex to talk with the squad again; to finally smile with Liv again, laugh with munch and Fin, and Cragen giving her that kind of side hug only a father could give to his daughter. Although she wasn’t the only one wondering where Novak was. 
 “Oh how I’ve missed you Alex!” As she pushed up her glasses to see who was barging in her door she soon became much happier; George huang her confidante. 
“George, it’s so nice to see you! Believe me i wanted to call you once I came back but as soon as i moved back into here they put me straight to work.” Alex felt like an ass for not sending him anything, before she had to go into witsec her and George were like two peas in a pod being the squad’s helpers. They’d go out for drinks, watch movies together, he was always there whenever she had a case too twisted for her office to handle. 
“So have you seen Casey since coming back?” Alex could feel her ears turn red as she thought of her office crush; it felt odd to call it that because Alex has never had a crush, she definitely has never liked a woman before. All she could respond with was “no, but I think branch is trying to get us to meet.”
    “Hello?” 
Casey and Alex unknowingly responded the same exact way to Branches message; he wanted them to officially meet outside of the courtroom, he had a proposition for them. 
 “So you want us both on svu?” Casey was mind boggled; she thought this was Ludacris, she could barely get past the fact that Alex was back, she seemed so intimidating and not to mention how stunning she was. Every time she passed her after court it felt like her heart was pounding so hard it would burst; all Casey knew was that before her time at svu, Alex was unstoppable; the squad admired her and she was known as the ice queen throughout the DA’s office. 
‘This cannot be happening’ the only thing that could come to Alex’s mind. She honestly wouldn’t mind working along with another ADA because god knows the workload at svu was hell; but to work with Casey would be damn near impossible. No matter what, whenever Novak was in Alex’s view she couldn’t think about anything besides her; their was no aspect of Casey’s that Alex wasn’t in awe of, her green eyes; whenever piercing blue eyes met Casey’s it felt like the world stopped for just a second; Casey’s lips; as inappropriate as it was Alex couldn’t stop staring at her pink lips, they looked so soft like an angel’s; she could say anything and it wouldn’t matter because Alex was in such awe of Casey, she could do nothing wrong.
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sp-by-april · 18 hours
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PC!Kyle x F!Reader [Part 2]
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[Part One] [Kyle Broflovski Master List]
I heard from Kyle two weeks later. Honestly, I was used to guys hitting me up immediately so I kind of wondered if he'd just forgotten about me. I was relieved when that wasn't the case.
He said he was having drinks with some of his friends and to meet him at the end of the night and he’d take me to his place. Kinda weird, but whatever. I really wanted to see him.
As I walked in, I saw him talking to a bunch of other old guys.
“She is pretty,” Kyle said.
“She’s hot,” Stan said with a grin, “I was gonna pick her up first, but I figured Kyle could use the fun,”
Kyle frowned, “Is that how you remember it going?”
An awkward smile slid over my face as I embedded myself with the group of men and made my presence known, “That’s pretty much how I remembered it,”
“Pretty girl!” the guys all said in unison as they lifted their assorted glasses towards me.
Kyle kissed my cheek and leaned over my ear with a smirk, “Sorry, they saw my phone,”
I nodded, reaching for the drink in his hand. Thankfully, he handed it over without a second thought.
I finished the liquor and listened intently as all the guys rushed to introduce themselves to me.
Tolkien was a cop. Clyde… I still don’t know what he actually does. Jimmy, was a comedian that I vaguely remembered my mother watching when I was a kid. Kenny, billionaire, needed no introduction but provided one all the same.
I felt more awkward and out of place than ever. I think Kyle realized it because he plucked the drink out of Stan’s hand and placed it in mine.
I was used to older guys vying for my attention so I knew how to navigate it. Older guys tend to like when I’m bolder, brasher, and more irreverent than their younger counterparts. These guys were a lot less intimidated by a woman with a mouth and I appreciated it. I was nervous but the whole thing went fine.
Kyle and I left first. I could hear the guys talking about how lucky he got before the door even closed behind us.
When we got to his place, I was slightly annoyed with having his friends sprung on me but I was horny enough to let it slide. At least, I would have let it slide if he let me.
He looked me up and down as he hung up his blazer and I tossed my purse and pink capelet jacket on his couch.
Kyle tilted his head as he watched me, “What’s bothering you?”
“Nothing,” I lied and approached with my sultriest walk.
“I get it,” A slight smile slid over his face as he reached out and cupped my cheek in the palm of his hand, “You’re closed off because behind the walls, you’re soft – But you don’t have to lie to me,”
I rolled my eyes,“Don’t psychoanalyze me,”
“I’d never,” He chuckled, “I don’t think you could afford it,”
I’d had enough.
“You can’t ignore me for weeks and then spring your friends on me,” I fumed, “And you definitely don’t get to treat me like a trophy after the fact – Like I’m some stupid girl who doesn’t know that some guy is just using her for sex,”
He squinted like he was trying to solve a difficult equation, “How can I be using you for sex if I’m ignoring you at the same time?”
Okay, that time I’d had enough.
“Have fun explaining to your friends how you let a girl like me get away,” I said and spun on my heels to leave.
“I wasn’t ignoring you,” He sighed as my hand reached for the doorknob, “And I wasn’t trying to ambush you – Okay, I was trying to ambush you, but for a good reason,”
I turned back to Kyle and crossed my arms, “There’s no good reasons to ambush people,”
“The guys I made those plans months ago and I’ve been swamped at work if you couldn't tell. I couldn’t cancel on them and I wanted to see you. Besides, I figured it would be a quick way to help you get to know me. Kind of like a crash course,”
“You want me to know you?” I asked and took a slow step towards him.
He smirked, “Yeah,”
I took another cautious step, “Why?”
He glanced away and rubbed the nape of his neck, “Because I want to know you,”
“You were really just busy with work?” I asked, walking the rest of the way to meet him.
He slid his palm over my cheek and I stood on my tiptoes to give him a kiss and he leaned in, but instead he brought his face to my neck. His other hand found my waist and his nose brushed against my earlobe as he inhaled my scent.
“Trust me, if it were up to me I would’ve had you in my bed every night,” He sighed, his hot breath washing over my skin, “You have no idea what you do to me. I haven’t been this fucking horny since high school,”
He kissed my neck and my fucking heart skipped a beat.
Then the hand on my waist slid over my ass and he pulled me up against him, “I can’t stop thinking about the way you move your hips,”
He finally pulled me into a kiss and I nearly swooned in his arms. I parted my lips and he pulled me into a deeper kiss, his tongue sliding right in my mouth.
His hand slid up my skirt, just to pull my panties down. He pushed my back against the wall and dropped to his knees.
He kissed my thigh as his fingers slid over my slit. I’m pretty sure I felt his breath hitch when he felt how wet I was. His fingers pushed inside and I almost gasped. I think it was the anticipation. I felt like I’d been waiting forever for him to touch me again. The way he moved his fingers felt like fucking magic.
He kissed my hip bone and his fingers curled to massage that sweet spot inside of me. I bit my lip, trying to stifle at least some moaning so I didn’t sound like some slut. I should have known better. Maybe he was right about me having walls.
Either way, he increased the pressure and speed. I felt like I was completely at his mercy. He buried his face against my hip, which pressed into him as his fingers brought me to my climax.
Or they would have if he hadn’t stopped just as I was about to hit my high.
I looked down at him and I swear that I meant to bitch, but instead I just whimpered.
He looked up at me and smirked, “You’re even prettier when when you’re needy,”
“I’m not needy,” I lazily protested.
“Hmm?” He licked a thick stripe over my clit and my entire body shuddered, “Really?”
I whined so loud that I was actually kind of mortified. Seeing the smug look of satisfaction on his face just made it worse.
He got on his feet and threw me over his shoulder. He carried me to his bed, my panties still down at my knees.
He dropped me on his bed and slowly slid my panties down over my ankles. I watched breathlessly as he pulled off his shirt and unbuttoned his pants. Then unzipped. Then stepped out of them.
He stroked himself over his boxer-briefs as he looked at me laid out on his bed. I could see every bit of how badly he wanted me. When he finally lost the underwear, I thought I was going to go insane just from the anticipation.
“I want to keep you,” He leaned over me and left a small kiss on my collarbone, “I’m gonna make you my wife,”
“...What?” My breath hitched and I had to replay the sentence in my mind at least three times to make sure that I heard him correctly.
“I promise I’ll take care of you,” He rubbed the head of his cock over my slit, picking up my desire for him, “And I’ll make you feel good,”
He kissed my neck and I cupped his cheeks and brought his face to mine. I had to look him in the eyes.
“You promise to take care of me?” I asked him just above a whisper.
“I’ll do more than that,” He groaned as he sank deep into me and I gasped as I felt him push my body to it’s limits.
He held still for just a moment, both of us relishing the initial feeling of him immersed in me, and finally experiencing what we’d both been craving for weeks.
I grabbed onto his shoulders and my eyes rolled back when his hips finally started to move.
“You can do anything you want to me,” I said thinly, struggling to speak and not just moan.
His eyes were glued to me as I moaned shamelessly. His hand palmed my breast and his thumb brushed over my nipple, eliciting a softer moan from me that seemed to enamor him. He pinched my nipple and gave it a light tug, drinking in every soft sound I made.
A small smirk slid over his face just before he locked his mouth onto mine. He picked up the pace, his rhythm getting more and more intense. I couldn’t believe how good he felt, his cock was indulging my sweet spot with every fucking stroke. My hands ran down his back, my freshly manicured nails dragging over his skin.
His hand slid down, held onto my hips as he pressed me into his mattress and kept me in place as he irresistibly pounded into me.
My back arched and as I did my best to resist the orgasm. I lost the fight. My body seized up, and all the bliss that had built up inside of me swelled to an unimaginable, incredible level. Everything was incredible with him. My nails dug into his skin, my back arched even more sharply. I moaned brazenly. My moans were quivering and embarrassingly loud. The sacred space in my core fastened up around him and I grasped him like I needed him to live. Like he meant everything to me. Like I was desperate for him. I think I was.
As I trembled underneath him, the visuals and sensations of my orgasm pushed him over the edge. He groaned low in his throat and his eyes rolled back as his hips bucked into me. He sealed his mouth back onto mine as he drove deep inside of me and his hips noticeably twitched. I moaned into our kiss as his cock pulsed intensely and pumped me full of hot, milky spurts. His tongue slid into my mouth as he finished spilling every bit of his seed glazing my cervix.
He panted over me and pet my hair as all the tension that had built up in his muscles melted off of him. He kissed me again and a sly smile slid over his face, “I’m keeping you for sure,”
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mundaneblue · 2 days
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Alien Stage Theory time!!
With Round 7 just around the corner, I felt it fitting to look back on my theories I've gathered so far and very heavily believe in. But my most CRUCIAL one that I always feel like talking about is:
Ivan meant for both him and Till to die in Round 6.
So I am of the opinion that Ivan did NOT plan to do the whole sacrifice at all.
It was spontaneous.
And I have several reasons to back this theory up.
So we all know that ever since Ivan and Till were kids, Ivan had been obsessed with the idea of them escaping together.
He knew Till valued “freedom” and because he did, Ivan started to value it too. But never alone. Only with Till.
Since Ivan went back to Anakt instead of escaping after Till did the same because of the fear of leaving Mizi.
Even in the scene where Ivan finds Till passed out in around 6, he looks helpless, and cradles his face in a “Dont worry, it’ll all end soon” kind of way.
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So when Till stops singing and Ivan approaches him to kiss, the kiss was NOT planned.
Now this was the factor that surprised everyone. Even Unsha. It was so unexpected that he wished he knew what Ivan was thinking, but that’s the thing.
Ivan WASNT thinking.
Even Ivan himself was shocked at what he was doing since he had no control over his actions at that moment at all.
And this correlates to ivan's eccentric behaviour. As we know that ever since he was a child, he never really felt like he fit in with his fellow peers. This is very interesting to me as in Black Sorrow we are shown this picture of Ivan being very uninterested in spending time with the kids in his class. He has this mundane look of unamusement.
But as we look at more alien stage content, we see that Ivan was actually one of the most social in his class. Everyone admired him.
This shows that the rounds/videos don't necessarily mean what was infact happening but what the characters themselves felt.
This is also why I believe Ivan and Till were way more closer than what Ivan painted in his rounds. He just never felt the same love from Till, hence his constant inner mantra of wanting Till to look at him.
Now we've gotten that clear!
The main thing I want to deliver is that Ivan is an unreliable narrator. And he doesn't know how to handle his feelings in a methodical way. He has this distortive, almost possessive view when it comes to love and honestly that, to me, is what makes Ivan Ivan.
Ivan doesn't know how to properly think when he's faced with his emotions. He's used to tuning out his emotions to do things. So when his emotions get involved? It's like an electric shock and he relies on the thing closest to him to hold on to.
And that thing is Till.
Ivan was obsessed with Till. I'm sure we all know that but people really undermine his determination when it comes to Till.
I really do believe that Ivan planned for both him and Till to die in R6 as an ode to their longing for freedom.
Because all Ivan ever wanted was to be free with Till.
The counter statements that suggest he wasn't choking Till and merely had his hands on him simply doesn't sit with me as the animation clearly showed Ivan's hands clenching hard as he progressed to choke him.
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Look at the dent formed by Ivan's fingers on his neck, right at the crucial point of air supply.
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And Till is shocked but as he's gradually losing air, his eyes start to get heavy and he gets ready to accept the darkness that follow
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And while Ivan is getting shot, he chokes him even harder.
Because that IS his goal.
For Till and him to die so they'd be together in whatever life that follows hereafter.
I disagree when I hear that Ivan meant to sacrifice himself for Till. Yes that did happen at the end but it was never what he initially intended. His initial intent was far more dark and possessive. Which is very on brand for a Vivinos character.
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However, now we're getting to the sacrifice part and I believe this is where Ivan had a turning point.
As he gets his final shot and basically sees he's about to die, he looks at Till in surprise.
Because no matter how much he wished for them both to be together, he can't kill his God. He can't kill his Universe. Ivan is possessive but Ivan is also weak when it comes to him.
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This smile of his shows that sentiment. "Ah I really can't go through with it afterall"
Ivan always believed he and Sua were similar but he resented her for sacrificing herself for Mizi. He believed he was better than that. He won't ever do that. Wherever Till goes, he goes. Yet, when he was actually faced with the task of doing it, he finally realised what Sua felt. Because Sua, just like Ivan, was also quite possessive of Mizi.
He couldn't do it, and at that moment he knew that he and Sua really weren't so different. Only difference was that while Sua was loved, felt love. Ivan never felt it.
Ivan did everything for Till. He stayed at Anakt for Till. He pursued alien stage for Till.
And his last act was also for Till. He wanted his last action to be for himself, to finally grant his long due wish of being with Till but he couldn't do it. And while the sacrifice was spontaneous, it was just so...easy to do. Because again, Ivan thought Till never cared as much about him as he did (abandonment issues at their finest) so him dying wouldn't really affect him as much.
This makes Ivan so much more tragic for me. And this heavily fits him as a complex character.
"Thank you for being the victim of my shallow emotions."
When were you or your feelings ever shallow, Ivan...
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peachjagiya · 2 days
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I hope you don’t take offense to what I am about to say cuz i’ll speak freely. I think the issue here is, so many taekookers kept talking about how much Jungkook didn’t want to do the show and even went as far as claiming that he was forced to do this show no matter how much Jungkook verbally proclaimed how much fun he was having and how he loved the show. Let’s also be serious here, does anyone really believe that Jungkook would have continued shooting in other locations if he hated the first experience in NY? Before someone comes up with the contract excuse, I need to remind everyone that this show was never the company’s idea. It was Jimin who thought of it, told Jungkook about it and then pushed at the level of the company to make it happen. I had never gotten chance to watch ITS friendcation with Tae because honestly I am more a music fan and their variety shows or other healing shows kinda bore me but I recently watched Friendcation and it was Tae too who wanted to film the show with his wooga squad and from what I understood from what they said at the beginning, he was the one who took the idea to the company and they let it happen. So I don’t think it’s fair to claim that Jungkook couldn’t back out of the show even if he didn’t like it because he was contractually bound.
Right now if I were jikookers I would gloat too because so many people have claimed that Jk looked miserable, looked disinterested, didn’t want to do the show at all or didn’t see the point but from his own words we know that is far from the truth. Not only did he declare how much he loved the show and how free he felt during the show, he also thinks that out of all the trips he been on in his life, these trips for AYS were the best. He also mentioned wanting to go back to the start of their trip so anyone still claiming that Jungkook didn’t love being on that show is not being realistic or reasonable at all. He could have just not said anything if he didn’t feel that way because ofcourse he couldn’t say he didn’t enjoy the trip if he didn’t (or maybe he could) so knowing how blunt Jk can be if he said he loved it, then he loved it. So I think it is wise to just stop with all the stuff about him not liking it or not not wanting to be there because nothing we have seen and heard from him supports that line of thought. He clearly looked bummed that the trip was ending, him and Jimin, and someone wouldn’t feel that way if they didn’t enjoy the trip. I feel like those trips to him, were an opportunity for him to break away from his excessive work load for a few days and just unwind, have fun and eat to his hearts delights. In hindsight, I think it was a great Idea that the show was there to film as after watching his documentary and seeing just how much he worked and pushed himself, I think those few days inbetween schedules to just have fun did him some good.
This is just me stating my honest opinion and I hope I didn’t say anything condescending or rude.
Honest opinions are fine and you're welcome to them.
The only thing I want to query is that jimkookers should gloat. What is this victim storyline? Oh well they're only gloating cos we were so mean to them?
They spent a couple of weeks saying JK visibly hated Tae, laughing at misinterpreted jokes to make it look like JK wanted him gone, mocking their short lay down. Did they all bow at our feet when he finally said it was better with Tae? No they absolutely did not. What they did was just carry on. Cos they perceived events a different way. And I couldn't give a fuck if they do that.... until they get pissy when others do it.
I have never, in my life, been to a JMKK space to "gloat." Or to say anything actually. I've often wondered about their thoughts on things and I just haven't ever. It's not my space.
Imagine if the tumblr Taekookers reacted to, for example, Hawaii this way. Ran into Jikook spaces to "gloat". Because as you say here, we had plenty of reason to. After months and years of "JK can't stand being around him" and "Tae just lies" that became too much even in the short time I've been around, there was vindication. Yeah, we could have gloated.
I bet if we'd done that, the first thing the jmkkrs would say would be "why hasn't this made you feel good?"
What actually happened is we just had a couple of exciting days being dorks about it, feeling good and happy in our "community" here.
So they should go do that.
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storiesbyjes2g · 20 hours
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3.170 One more thing
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I probably should have waited to have the next conversation, but I figured since we were getting everything in the open, we may as well discuss finding a new house. Besides, she said she missed talking, right? Autumn in San Sequoia is beautiful. It's refreshingly cool in the mornings, and evenings, and warm during the day. I suggested we take Desi and hang out in our side yard for a bit. A little while ago, I packed up the yoga mats I had out there and set up a nice outdoor chill spot. It's clear I'm not gonna achieve my yoga dreams, if you can even call them that. We weren't using the space, so I turned it into something we will definitely use. Since Desiree will be walking soon, I'll have to get her some toys and things out here. But for now, she can take a nap under the sun in the fresh air while Sophia and I talk business.
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It was a little cool, so Sophia lit a fire to keep the baby warm. I let us enjoy the weather and silence for a few moments before bringing up Alessia's conversation.
"So, ummm, after the memorial, Less told me she wants to move."
"Oh! That's great. So she's gonna live in your dad's house then?"
"No."
"Oh. So you're gonna help her find a place?"
"Yes, but not exactly what you're thinking."
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She gave me that "Watcher, here we go," face, and I knew I had to sweeten this deal even before I presented it.
"Dub and Maia live in a duplex. They live on one side and rent out the other. I think a situation like that will be ideal for us. Less will be right next door if something happens. We'll share a backyard so the kids can grow up and play together. It's perfect for us. And if Less ever wants to move out, we can rent it to another family and have another stream of income. It's a win win for all of us."
"Wait," she said. "You want us to move? We just got here!"
"True, but things change. It's no big deal. We'll still be in San Sequoia. Just another neighborhood."
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"But I love it here," she said. "We spent so much time and money making it our own. Luca, you proposed to me here! I gave birth here! This is my home!"
Sometimes I forget Sophia lived in one place for a long time. Plus, she's a lot more sentimental than I am. This house is the sixth home I've lived in. Moving is no big thing to me, even though this particular home is special to me too. I dreamed about living here; I longed for it. But life hasn't turned out how we thought it would, so my priorities are different now. While I could accomplish my goals perfectly from here, I'd be more at ease somewhere else.
"I understand. We've had lots of great memories here. And I know you're concerned about me being too involved in Less' life, but I think the best way to minimize my time away from home is to have her as close as possible. I promised Mama I'd look after her, Sophia."
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She let out a looooong sigh and sat in silence for a bit. I wanted to know what went on in her head, but I knew I needed to let her work it out within herself first, so I waited until she was ready to continue.
"What about this house? What will happen to it?"
I honestly wasn't too keen on selling it. I worked really hard to get it, and I didn't want anyone else to enjoy the fruit of my labor.
"We'll keep it," I said, hoping we'll be able to afford to buy a new house without selling this one. "Less won't need us so close forever. This duplex situation is just temporary, so we can come back here when it's over. Maybe we'll rent it out while we're gone."
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Sophia winced at that idea.
"Or it can just sit here until we come back," I said.
She nodded and sighed.
"I don't want to move," she said. "I don't think it's necessary. But everything you said makes sense. I do want Desi to be close to her cousins. The thought of her having easy access to them sounds nice. And I know how much you love your sister."
"Thank you. I'm sorry we have to leave here, but I really do think this will be good for all of us."
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mamamanguito · 1 year
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it's crazy how not talking to someone you were really close to for like a month and a half can do to you
#so this friend of mine who struggles with depression started isolating themselves and stopped talking to me#we go to classes together and even tho we were literally sitting next to each other he didn't even said his hellos or goodbyes#i tried to respect their space but me struggling with abandonment issues as i am started spiralling out of control#i had several mental breakdowns because i felt and honestly still do feel alone and rejected and like a burden and yeah#and although we talked things out we just haven't been talking since#and I'm afraid our relationship will never be the same#i genuinely feel like i lost someone again#although i tried to be understanding after i got told that he doesn't considers me at all while going through things#which okay fair#I feel so silly and also terribly hurt by how time and time again the people i love and value the most just don't prioritize me at all#like I'm not even important enough to them#and honestly after talking about it we went back to not talking#so i tries to remove myself from that and just decided not to try to talk until they are ready to do so#so i can be a good friend#but honestly I'm not trying to be a good friend#i was just hurt and now I can't bring myself to try again#two months ago i thought of them as my closest friend#and now i can't even remember how it was#I can't remember how we used to talk#i don't think i can ever go back#and i feel bad for feeling this way#specially because i now they're going through tough times#but i can't help myself#i wish i could be more detached and normal#then maybe these things wouldn't affect me at all
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hella1975 · 2 months
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so there's a reason my new job got back to me so quickly about my application and that's bc it's an absolute fucking shambles like actually perfect timing for me to decide to rewatch the bear bc i have never more felt like ive been thrown into a broke on-its-knees establishment trying to crawl its way up the ladder where i am somehow a godsend to them. my old job was crazy and shambolic in the sense that the industry is just Like That but this one?????? insanity. every 5 mins i am questioning what im doing with my life. ive already had a walk-in fridge moment
#so i explained before that there's 3 venues and on my very first shift they had me doing the restaurant venue for 2 hours#which was FINE like i was a bit cautious bc my manager is VERY stressed all the time and the place generally feels like it's falling apart#not the building itself just. the way it's run like it's just got new owners and the previous manager apparently#EMPTIED THE TILLS AND TRASHED THE PLACE like cost them THOUSANDS of pounds and on top of that#there was beef with the head chef and the new owners that meant he left and took the ENTIRE BACK OF HOUSE WITH HIM#THERE ARE NO KITCHEN STAFF ATM. I HAVE TO LIE AND TELL CUSTOMERS WE DONT HAVE FOOD ATM BC OF 'REFURBISHMENT'#WHEN IN ACTUALITY THE /RESTAURANT/ DOESNT HAVE CHEFS. DO YOU KNOW HOW CRAZY THAT IS#and then the front of house staff are very lacking aside maybe 2 people we're ALL NEW and all of them EXCEPT ME#LIKE LITERALLY JUST ME IM THE ONLY EXCEPTION. ALL OF THEM ARE UNTRAINED#so when i applied with bar training coffee training and very solid waitressing skills they genuinely treated me like a saviour#like i am FENDING off shifts tbh im in a v good position bc they need me too much to get shitty w me if i refuse hours but i can literally#have as many as i want bc they will just give me them. like they're obsessed w me im rota'd for over 60 hours this week#but anyway that very first shift after 2 hours in the restaurant i then walked to the mini golf venue on the OTHER SIDE OF TOWN#and my manager stayed for 30 MINUTES. IF THAT. and showed me around the place + how to close THEN LEFT ME THERE#FIRST DAY HE GAVE ME THE KEYS AND LEFT ME TO RUN AN ENTIRE VENUE. IT'S NOT SMALL EITHER IT'S A WHOLE BAR#AND I HAD TO CLOSE ON MY OWN TOO and ironically the shift itself went rlly well like it was so chill#it was kinda boring but honestly i kinda rated it it's v easy money and the close went perfectly nothing cropped up that i was unsure about#and then. AND THEN. i havent even ranted to my mutuals about this yet bc i was acc so horrified by it but i locked the front doors#and went to lock the gate AND THE KEY GOT STUCK IN THE LOCK. WOULD NOT COME OUT. HELLA VS KEYS ROUND 3927593#my mum even showed up and tried to help me wrestle this thing out i called my manager and he literally told me to just snap it#bc he'd rather a snapped key that NO ONE could get out than just leave it there overnight but bc of my recent house key moment#i was like AM I FUCK SNAPPING THIS KEY. WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING. so i had to just leave it and at the time#i was realllyyyyyyyyyy beating myself up but my manager is actually rlly nice he's just stretched v thin#and ive also had time to be like uhh actually they shouldnt have left a random 21 y/o girl alone with the keys on her first day#omg i havent even talked about what happened on saturday. ACTUAL SHAMBLES#LIKE THIS /\/\ ISNT EVEN CLOSE TO EVERYTHING! IM RUNNING OUT OF TAG ROOM! IM GONNA REBLOG THIS TONIGHT W MORE PROBABLY!#BC GUESS WHO IS WORKING A CLOSE LATER AT THE NIGHTCLUB THEN OPENING THE RESTAURANT AT 8AM. GUESS#hella slaves to capitalism
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camgoloud · 5 months
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you ever just. become overwhelmed by a sudden out-of-nowhere wave of tenderness and affection and longing for reconnection directed towards someone to whom you no longer speak for Very Good Reasons
#‘out of nowhere’ she says like she hasn’t been doing a lot of reading/thinking recently about various tragic messy breakups#and the later regrets of the parties involved#anyway. tell me not to text her#it’s been over two years since the last time we talked… absolutely no reason to break that streak now. lord give me strength#she was really fucking mean to me! like objectively intentionally unwarrantedly cruel! it ruined an entire year of my life#and fundamentally changed me as a person on a deep level! there’s a lot of things i used to like about myself that i don’t think i’m ever#going to get back#and yet every once in a while we have to do the whole ‘maybe i could make things right’ song and dance 😔#the thing is most of the time i’m not even really angry with her anymore like enough time has passed since all the shit went down that#really i just sort of look at her behavior and feel sad. both because of the impact on me but also because of the ‘that’s really how you#felt you needed to act towards someone who cared about you? you couldn’t have just expressed your feelings in an honest and productive way#instead of just lashing out in the cruelest possible way and ruining the entire relationship beyond hope of repair?’#and i feel bad and sorry that it went that way and honestly i kind of pity her and hope she’s gotten some of her shit worked out#so i’m not like. actively pissed off at her anymore. but also i can’t think about her without thinking about the worst year of my life so 🙃#i don’t actually feel that trying to reopen that door would be very healthy for me at least#we did try a Reconciliation of sorts a couple of months after the initial falling-out and while it was kind of helpful for me in that she#like. apologized lmao. and affirmed that i wasn’t crazy and she did in fact On Purpose say the most hurtful things she possibly could have#said to me given the information she had at her disposal. and that i really had not done anything to her that could warrant that. etc.#it also left a sour enough taste in my mouth that i just don’t see a future where the two of us spending time together is enjoyable for me#and yet… the regret will always live inside me i think. maybe if i were a stronger person…#caseyposting
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perilegs · 20 hours
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i am my father's son (enjoyer of irl sidequests)
#i didn't get to do the sidequest i almost got though 😔#i exited my apartment. theres a guy outside and i greet him bc i assumed he was a neighbour#and he greets me back and then hes like im sorry i hopped over the fence as a shortcut idk if that's fine#nd then continued and said he'll check if he dropped something#and i'm like yea ok sure!#bc i was going to lidl and i wanted to get going but i did just stand there for a bit in case the guy needed help or something#then he emerged from the fence area and he was like ''if you find something in there can you pick it up akd put out a note'' and i was like#yea ofc! i'll do that if i see anything#and then he was like this is a very nice area so i trust people will let me know if i did drop something#and i was like for sure#im not great at smalltalk but he was very polite so i tried my best#also he seemed like he wasnt having the best time#he might have been on something bc he was slurring his speech and drooling a lot and there was a certain look in his eyes but honestly that#none of my business#we said bye and i sat in my car and then he was like ''hey actually i live like a minute away super close but my bag is super heavy#can i get a ride there it's super close next to [redacted]''#and i moved my bag from the front seat and was like ''yea sure''#and then he stared at me for a bit and was like ''actually i dont want to bother you have a nice day bye'' and left with a wave#i was like you too and waved back#he didnt look like he had any trouble walking so i came to the conclusion that he's fine and then went to lidl#but honestly i am a bit disappointed he didnt want me to give him a ride after all bc he seemed like he would have interesting things to sa#he was super polite and talked a lot and despite me being a finn i dont always mind strangers talking to me#bc if i have nothing important to do it's like. might as well!#another chat outside my apartment ive had was this old lady and she knew a lot about the history of the area we live in#and it was very interesting and also like i said if im in no hurry to go anywhere i love listening to ppl yap about whatever#i hope both the fence hopping guy and the old lady are doing good#leevi talks
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nexus-nebulae · 4 months
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found my ancient mp3 player recently. finally found a charger for it and plugged it in. and remembered i found a yt playlist of the whole httyd movie chopped up into like 20 videos and i downloaded the mp3s of all of them to listen to on the school bus. which is why i can effortlessly quote the whole first movie now
#i was. unhealthily obsessed with that whole franchise#oh my god i just remembered i used to write rise of the brave tangled dragons fanfic oh my god 😭#i didn't publish much but i had an irl friend also in the fandom and we shared a quotev account to publish stuff together#i still remember the full name she used online#we both used our main characters names online- Rosa and Sara#though i sometimes went by Jenny bc canonically Jenny was Sara's name before she changed it the second she wasn't on earth anymore#(<- EGG. EGG. EGG. EGG.)#(like legit the second she got isekaid she cut her hair super short and changed her name-)#also sara canonically had the ability to absorb others' souls when they died and then shapeshift into them majoras mask style#(<- EGG CARTON. EGG CARTON. EGG CARTON. EGG CA#sara was dating jack frost bc of fucking course she was. also she had fire magic#Rosa was with Hiccup#and then we had another fic with Kate and Billie who were sisters#years after me and the irl friend stopped talking and i reworked the characters into their own original stories#Billie ended up in a lesbian relationship with a girl named Raven#and they ended up finding Billie's long lost infant sister and raising her like their own kid almost#also i say i wrote RoTBTG fanfic but honestly. i did not care much for tangled back then#i included Rapunzel because i didn't want to seem petty like i was just cutting out the girl i didn't like#bc i did like her just not enough to write her#but she never like. Did Anything#if anything she was usually stuck talking about politics with Stoick and meridas parents and couldn't adventure much#such is the life of a royal i reasoned . so i do not have to have her there and be bored by her#usually i replaced her in the quartet with fucking Melody from little mermaid 2 bc i was unreasonably obsessed with that since childhood#i watched little mermaid 2 before the actual first film because we owned the vhs and i was SO obsessed with melody i LOVED her#i also wanted to become a mermaid and loved singing#so i just. found ways to shoehorn her in#i do not remember everything that i posted and everything that stayed in the vault#bc when me and that irl stopped talking we both deleted Everything in a fit of 14 year old rage and pettiness#I've long since deleted the quotev account- she actually kept using it for years and i let her cause i wasn't THAT petty#but it was under my email and since i noticed she seemed to have abandoned it and i needed to delete the email. it is now gone
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wavesoutbeingtossed · 4 months
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#warning: rant about parent ahead#I’m so so so so so empathetic to mental health struggles#like exceedingly so#but it’s just so exhausting being on the receiving end of someone’s self-loathing#and to be clear I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT ANYONE HERE#you are all my phone besties and I have so much empathy for your struggles and know that i love you all#and wish i could say the right thing to support you all always and you are always welcome to share whatever is going on#and to quote the bard herself i wish i could take the bombs in your head and disarm them#but when my mother gets into these moods she just seems to use it as a way to get a rise out of us#she’s pulling the ‘well maybe you don’t want to do x with me because it’s not fun because I’m a terrible person and you’re scared of me#and i ruin everything so maybe you would just rather i do everything alone’#and i don’t doubt she feels horrible and i know she has intrusive thoughts etc#but that is so manipulative!!!! she then puts the onus on us to reassure her that she is not!!!! But that is not what she wants!!!!#which we then do profusely and remind her that we do love her and we do do things together and whatever the fuck is the problem of the day#but of course she won’t hear it#so yes it makes us scared of her because we are always worried we’re going to say the wrong thing in a given moment!!!!#i just shut the fuck up at all times now#but my dad tries to use reason with her and of course it just ends in her lashing out and projecting all this shit on him#’oh you maybe you actually hate me maybe you want to leave me’ etc#THEY’VE BEEN MARRIED DECADES HE’S THE MOST LOYAL AND KINDEST PERSON IN THE WORLD HE NEVER ONCE HAS#i honestly don’t know how he lets this roll off his back because i am so fed up with it#It’s just so so so so hard because one minute she’s ‘herself’ and the other she’s this inferno#and we just have to ride whatever wave she’s on and it sucks all the air out of the room#it’s like the one and only time i tried to very gently bring up that something she said was hurtful *after she’d brought it up herself*#she went on a ‘oh I’m a terrible person/terrible parent’ rant and it then turned into me reassuring her that she isn’t#i was just trying to show her how the language/behaviour she uses was hurtful to me#so anyway that was lesson learned that even if she invites it i will never speak of it and luckily she hasn’t since and that was years ago#But it’s just… i know bad thoughts can’t be helped and again i feel so much pain on her behalf for what she struggles with#and i wish i could help but there’s absolutely nothing i can do#AND SHE’S GONE OFF ALL HER MEDS SO THE ONE SOURCE SHE DID HAVE ISN’T THERE ANYMORE EITHER
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statementlou · 7 months
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If there are major age differences, that's treading a lot closer to it and I am sure things have happened that I wouldn't like (*cough Andrew Cushin*, and if older security/ Matt Vines etc are hooking up with very young fans rather than just locals)
What’s the andrew thing 👀👀👀
well I will be honest with you I NEVER liked Andrew Cushin his vibes are just BAD so have I at any point given him the benefit of the doubt? I have not. But... listen when you can tell you can tell, and that guy is a condescending little misogynist who definitely thinks he's too cool for us (louies) and probably the same about Louis tbh or I'll eat my fucking hat. So getting public reports of behavior that wasn't actually like ACTIONABLE, sure, was even so, to me, simply confirmation of what I already felt certain of: that if that's what he's willing to do in front of the cameras, the behind the scenes is worse, you know? But what did he actually do (that I know of), he jokingly asked fans to show ID to prove they weren't underage to come backstage (first of all the coming backstage part was real, he really was trolling the crowds for girls to give the uh special tour or whatever, and second bro if there is question, and third if it really was a joke that's not actually funny to tell you the truth) and he kissed a girl on barricade (at her request). That's it. So I might just be a hater! But I'm telling you: rancid fucking vibes from that guy. Mark my words.
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ayakashibackstreet · 6 months
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You know what, joining that Discord show club was a great idea, like half of my favourite PKC folks are there. And is there anything more wholesome than someone going '1!! hey, I remember that dog!! she's adorable, I'm glad she's doing well!' about a little pixel friend they made for you years ago?
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imo everyone on earth should be talking about Him (don't want this showing up in the tag even though it's not a diss) but everytime i go to the tag and there's only like 3 new posts i'm like. oh yeah almost no one cares except me and like 5 other ppl on here
i ran out of tags KFHSJENNXN i don't think that's literally ever happened to me before anyways don't read them because it's just me being insane as per usual
#most of his indirects on twitter are from people in diff asian countries as well and ik he's doing an asia tour soon(?)#bruh he's never coming back to the usa is he 😭😭😭 i need him in chicago i miss him so bad#i feel very ugly emotionally rn still bc i was reading all of the rando ass dating rumors of him last night LMAO and it pissed me off#i know i have no right to get mad and i'm being irrational but at the same time like. everyone is just like 'omg he's so in love rn'#bc his music has been very angsty and like. idk... conflicted? but his new song was very happy and sweet and very In Love Sounding#and i already know all his music is about one person bc he always talks about the same shit (he's very predictable i see right thru him)#and he's putting out a new song called 'shining' and he has been talking abt a person being his light/shining on him for the last 7yrs atp#so like. that's how i know it's about one specific person and i don't think he has moved on LMAOOO so unless he was dating the same random#7yrs ago i don't think he's dating any of the people they bring up tbh... i pay attention to these things not to brag or anything but like#being attentive to the people i love and noticing inconsistincies in their behavior and when they act diff is like. the only skill i have#at least irt other people LMAO like honestly i wrote all the lyrics he ever wrote down in a google doc and it shows a clear trajectory#that starts like... innocently and just gets more fucked up and toxic as it goes. and ppl say he's one of the most sane ppl they know#meanwhile he's been writing songs about 1 person for nearly 10 years and they get progressively more desperate and insane#I'M JUST SAYING. i completely forgot what my original point was but i guess it was most likely that. no one pays attention to him like i do#the songs started being about this person at the same time i started liking him and having dreams about meeting him btw#and they got progessively more uh. spiteful and desperate and weird as the years went on. did i mention i cast a spell on him 😐#and he literally says shit like 'it's impossible for me to move on' 'i don't care about anyone else' 'it's like i'm possessed' etc#and after we met at his concert he got really into saying shit like 'that one night wasn't enough' and 'the spotlight between us'#&the ever-famous 'i like the way you look at me' 'my eyes are on you' 'focus on me just look at me' when all i did was look at him all night#if you're reading this right now and thinking 'celeste do you seriously believe a kpop guy has been writing songs about you for 7 years?'#you should remember who i am and how i reacted to ***** having a gf (that i guessed exactly right months before he revealed it)#i'm schizophrenic 🤷‍♀️ but the guy i'm into was the one who started my fascination with soulmates and destiny and fate and shit like that#you know it's funny i mention that because he also started writing about that!!!!! in his songs!!! crazy#and he talks about the person making it hard for him to sleep and wanting to meet them in his dreams again and whathaveyou#i mean even in his two newest title tracks he says 'i'm frustrated in the studio the only melody that comes out is for you' and#'i want to turn everything about you into a song' in the newest one... hm.#and btw he announced his album right when i admitted i was in love with him again to my family (they know my insanity LMAO)#and he releases a song about being happy and in love and listening for someone's voice from far away to reach him/vice versa?????#right when i get back into him???#it's my fave color & his fave color & he's releasing it in my birth month like. i know billions of coincidences are a thing but it's crazy
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yangjeongin · 2 years
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man y’all the loving hyunjin hours are so intense rn i feel like i have s omuch to say but i don’t even know where to BEGIN i just feel like i’m gonna explode or something </3
#carly.txt#just thinking abt hiatus things as i ALWAYS DO when i listen to lovestay y'all already saw me talk about this#but it's like. idk. loving someone hits different when u go through the wringer u know??#distance makes the heart grow fonder etc etc#it's just like. man. we really went thru it (hyunjin and stays as a collective) but we made it#and he's probably a better person for it even if it hurt at the time! and now we are in a more serious parasocial relationship <3#the fact that some of y'all weren't here for all that is so crazy to me it's going to be two years ago since then soon??#like time has gone by so fast#i remember crying so hard the first time i heard him LAUGH when he was back omg#it was in the song camp preview i remember this it was just such a relief#i remember i was doing his birthday countdown at the time of the scandal too i was going crazYYYY#i almost didn't continue it but i was like. u know what i'm still happy he was born. so let's do it#idk idk i'm honestly glad some of u didn't experience it but i'm also glad  that some of us that did experience it are still here asdfsadsd#i think it's really good that he has fans that went through the hiatus period supporting him and that he has fans that came after that too#like!! he is just as lovable if not moreso than ever and i'm glad!! so many people agree with that#i'm just like idk. really proud of him?? and stays for making it through that time period#and for everyone growing in ways they wouldn't have if it didn't happen#i like to think good came out of it too in a lot of ways#i could talk about this forever and i probably will again next time i listen to the damn song but SDSDGSDDG#i need to go to sleep now#i can think of more to say actually but i'll STOP NOW#tl;dr i love him a lot and am really thankful to everyone that supports him today no matter how long you have#i hope he feels that love and can accept that he's worthy of it every day#more to say on this too but enough enough#ty for listening
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