#and i thought it was sort of funny for a scene transition

[thepenultimateword]

Your stuff is so good!! You should write a villain x weapon designer civilian snippet :0

Thank you, thank you, friend! Also, I’m loving the idea of that dynamic, so here you go!

CW: Weapons, unconsciousness, knockout gas

...

“Move and I’ll blow your head off.”

The ridges on the gun's metal barrel dug sharply into Civilian's hand, but they managed to keep their aim and voice steady as they pointed both at the villain in front of them. The criminal was currently backed up against the train doors, hands in the air, gas mask dangling nonchalantly off two fingers.

The villain raised their brow. "What are you some sort of hero?"

"No talking."

"I've never seen you before. I thought I'd met all of the agency's sentinals in white. Though you're not exactly dressed for the position. Maybe you're not--"

"I said no talking!" Civilian barked, taking a step forward and jerking the gun forward menacingly.

"Ok! Ok!" Villain said. They raised their hands higher. “Touch-y.”

On any other day, Civilian would have been like the other passengers, huddled up together in the far corners of the train or pressed back tight in their seats, as if they could disappear by mere force of will. But today, Civilian had been tasked with transporting their newest prototype to the agency for a demonstration. An electro-pulse gun that they’d tested on no less than five watermelons the night before. They were well acquainted with the damage it could do. They’d ripped the thing from its protective case without even thinking.

“I’ve already alerted the heroes to your location,” Civilian said. “So there’s no point in fighting anymore. Stay still until the next station and you’ll be arrested in one piece.”

“You alerted the heroes?” The villain raised both brows high. “How? I jammed the cell signals over the next twenty miles. Unless…” They grinned. “You have some other form of contact. You do work for the agency, don’t you?”

“Have you listened to a thing I've said? No more questions!"

“You’re the one who keeps chatting, darling. What? Nervous?”

Yes. And no. Their body was alight with adrenaline, every nerve a buzzing, quivering charge, and yet at the same time, they were surreally confident, gut numb and mind blank.

Villain pushed lightly off the doors with their elbows, taking a small, probing step forward. “Would you even really shoot?”

“You really want to try me?"

“You heroes make a lot of talk but not much action. What, don’t you have a code? 'Do no harm' or something like that? Besides, you're so cute." Another step forward. "I don't think you've ever been in a fight, let alone killed someone, so why don't you just--"

Civilian aimed the gun at the ceiling and squeezed the trigger. The energy projectile punched through the metal with ear-splitting BANG! The passengers shrieked. Villain knocked back against the doors with a thud.

The wind whistled loudly overhead as the air whooshed over the new gap in the roof, and after that shot, their ears might as well have been stuffed full of cotton, but even if they couldn't quite measure their own volume, they fixed the gun back on Villain's head and drove their point home.

“I’m really trying not to traumatize all these lovely people with the visual of your head exploding, and honestly, I’d really rather not kill you. But if you press me…if you doubt me, you’ll be dead faster than you can question me again.”

Villain gripped their mask abit tighter but their expression remained smooth and their posture loose. They whistled a long low note. “You’re something else, gunslinger. When this is all over, feel free to look me up anytime.”

“Fortunately, I don’t frequent prisons.”

“Me neither." Villain flashed a broader grin, full of white teeth and pocked with a dimple on one side. "Looks like we have something in common.”

The train screeched, the deceleration sending everyone lurching a bit to the right. In that exact moment, when Civilian's gun swayed a few centimeters off target, the villain's free hand shot to their belt.

"Hey!" Civilian shouted, stumbling a little as the train came to a complete stop. Villain tossed something small and round to the floor. Ping! Ping! It bounced twice, rolled a little into the aisle, and exploded in a cloud of cool fog. No not fog. Gas.

Civilian immediately turned their face into their shoulder, tipping the gun even further off target. The whole train car shrieked while Villain calmly pulled the gas mask over their head, obscuring the beginnings of an infuriating grin. Civilian opened their mouth to launch another threat but immediately choked on the sickly sweet gas. It raised around them so rapidly, they could barely see the nose of the weapon let alone, Villain. Not to mention...everything was getting sorta...slanty...

"S-sleepin'gas?" they slurred.

"I was never here to harm any of you." Villain's muffled voice seemed to come from all directions, echoey and distorted.

Civilian fell to one knee. Was it normal to feel like their head was buzzing?

"You made a really cute gunslinger, though. Like a western sheriff. Or an outlaw. Bet you'd be good in a holdup."

The train doors hissed as they opened. As some of the gas slipped free, they caught a glimpse of the Villain's shoulder as they darted out onto the platform.

The gun suddenly felt so heavy in their arms but they forced it up anyway. The barrel tipped to and fro, and their finger trembled on the trigger. They wanted to risk a blind shot, but there could be dozens of people standing outside on that platform. If they hit anyone else...

Their vision blurred, then blackened. They barely managed to set the gun down on the metal floor before passing out over top of it.

When they awoke, they were in the agency medical wing. They recognized it immediately by its obnoxious orange bedsheets and, well, Keith. Sort of hard to miss a giant, shining man in hero-white scrubs.

Civilian slowly pushed themselves upright. Their head throbbed with the movement, and they let out a rogue groan.

Keith turned away from the figure two beds down, covered from head to toe in bruises and now enveloped in their own cocoon of white luminescence.

"Civilian!" Keith beamed, light glimmering off his teeth. "You've regained consciousness! Any pain?"

Civilian rubbed the bridge of their nose. "Just my head... Was I hurt?"

"Not necessarily." Keith pressed both large hands to the sides of Civilian's skull. Civilian closed their eyes as they healer's glow wrapped around their head. Warmth trickled over their face and under their skin, ebbing the pain away little by little. "Just a very large dose of some sort of gaseous anesthesia. Luckily, there have been no long-term consequences so far. The ventilation created by the hole in the roof probably lessened some of the potency. Your handiwork?"

The events on the train rushed back all at once. They pulled out of Keith's grasp.

"Did we get them?" They looked rapidly around their bedside. "Where's my pulse gun?"

Keith stepped back and leaned against the empty bed beside Civilian's. "The gun is in weapons testing, I think."

"And the villain?"

"No. They escaped. We arrived just moments too late before they must have blended with the crowd.

Civlian threw themself back against their pillows with a heavy sigh. "Great."

"You still helped. You stopped Villain from completing whatever they originally planned and provided many citizens with immediate medical treatment by calling us in."

"Oh yeeeeah, I'm sure the whole team was just dazzled by my competence and quick-thinking. Especially when I couldn't hold Villain in place on anything but a moving train."

Keith frowned. "You don't need the title to be a hero."

"Thanks, Keith, that's really nice and heartfelt, and I'm sure you believe it, but seeing how you do have the title, and no one in power here thinks the same, it doesn't really mean that much to me."

Keith frowned but luckily didn't argue any further. Civilian knew they were being rude, but they really didn't need anyone else telling them that they were special the way they were. That they could do good their own way. That being a hero didn't even matter that much. It mattered a whole lot to them. And now they'd practically proven the entire agency right.

"What were they even doing on that train?"

"Robbery?" Keith shrugged. "Knock out the passengers and loot all their valuables."

"Alone?" Civilian traced the lines of the ceiling panels with their eyes. "They didn't even have a bag. How much could they have gathered if they planned on knocking out an entire train?"

"We don't know they were alone. They could have easily had accomplices posing as civilians throughout the train."

"True... Does the agency have a file on them? Tall, skinny, long black coat, annoyingly perfect eyebrows. Didn't show a power."

"I could look...but I'm not supposed to share that sort of info outside of other heroes..."

"Come on! What was that whole, 'you don't need a title' nonsense?"

"It wasn't nonsense! You are a hero! Just...not a legally sanctioned one."

Civilian sat back up and lowered their voice. "Come on, Keith. I'm not going to do anything; I'm just curious. You don't even have to give me the whole file. Just take a couple pictures of anything you think might also be on the news."

Keith grimaced.

"Please? I was so close today. So close to being what I always planned to be... Just let me chase that high a little longer. Then I'll go back to the weapons lab and never mention it again. Promise."

Keith inhaled a long breath, letting it out in a loud, irritated sigh. "Ok, fine. But don't bring it up to anyone. Ever. And I'm only giving you the first page."

Civilian's insides sank a little; they weren't sure what a first page of a villain file looked like, but they could assume it wasn't much. But they couldn't really be picky, so... "That's fine. Just the first page is perfect."

Keith looked like they had hoped that detail would deter them, but he continued on. "It might take awhile. I'm a hero, but I'm a healer, so no one is expecting me to march into the files room and request info on villains."

"That's ok, I can be patient. I work in weapons, remember? That's like the ultimate test in being patient."

Keith slid a hand over his face. "Ok. I'm also going to need more detail than 'annoyingly perfect eyebrows.'"

[querenciasturniolo]

This is such a random concept but can you write something to do with the triplets finding out you’re a fan of there’s (which is shocking cuz you’re a well known singer) and you guys finally meet up for a car video and Chris, who’s usually really talkative, gets really quiet and nervous and Matt and Nick catch on to why and they end up teasing him…

favorite ⮕ c.s.

word count: 2.7k

warnings: swearing, teasing, she/her pronouns

summary: the triplets invite you to to do a video with them after a viral video at your last concert on tour, and teasing ensues when chris is awfully quiet for once

a/n: this one is a little longer, but only because i am awful at transitions and find way too much detail important. this was SO fun to write, i hope i did it justice 💓

{i am NOT calling fangirls losers, at all. i am a fangirl and a loser, but that doesn’t mean everyone is. i wrote y/n saying she was a loser bc i thought it was funny, carry on}

everything written is completely fictional. the people i write for are written with characteristics and mannerisms that i made for them, this is in no way depicting what would actually happen in real life.

part one || part two

“You have stated multiple times before that you’re a fan of many people, whether they’re artists or creators of some sort. Any you’d like to mention?”

“The Sturniolo triplets, easy. They’re content creators; they make these car videos and they’re absolutely hilarious. I found them on Tiktok about a year ago, and I’ve been watching them ever since.”

A single answer to a question had your fans going absolutely ballistic.

It was your fault, of course, but you didn’t think they would act like this. In every one of your posts, more comments than not were about the triplets. You found it more funny than anything, knowing that your fans were just excited that you enjoyed the same things they did.

At the closing show of your tour, you had just finished your last song, and you looked out at the crowd one last time to realize that this wasn’t going to go away. A single sign in the crowd had you laughing and shaking your head.

DO A VIDEO WITH THE TRIPLETS

You pointed at the sign as you walked back to leave the stage. “The ball is in their court, now.” You said, the crowd going ballistic as you finally stepped off of the stage.

After that, it seemed radio silent for a while, but you had no idea what was going on behind the scenes. It had been only a few weeks since that show, and you were just hanging out at your apartment, one of your best friends sitting across from you on the couch.

“Y/n, have you seen this?”

You looked up from your phone and glanced at her screen, a video of your last concert playing. The sign was shown before it was turned around and the camera was on you. You saw you grin and laugh at the sign and point, saying what you said before. The moment you finished, you heard the fan scream and other screams around her completely fucking with the speaker.

“I mean, I remember that happening, but I haven’t seen the video, why?” You asked, handing her phone back to her. She raised her eyebrows and kept her phone screen facing you.

“It’s viral.”

Your eyes immediately went to the likes, and you were shocked to see there were over four million. “Holy shit.” You mumbled, your phone vibrating in your hand. You looked down, your jaw dropping when you saw the DM before you. “Holy shit!”

nicolassturniolo: hey! would you want to be in a car video??

You stared at the screen, completely speechless as you looked between the DM and your friend. “What the fuck do I say?” You asked, finally opening the message. She laughed from across from you and you couldn’t help but stare at her, completely bewildered.

“Say yes? It’s a pretty simple answer.” She said. You nodded your head and answered Nick quickly, asking him when they wanted to meet up. “How are you fangirling right now?”

You looked up again and frowned. “Because I’m a loser, obviously.” You said, your friend laughing and shaking her head as she dropped back down on her side of the couch.

You and Nick messaged back and forth, you finding out the details of the video and where they wanted to meet up. You decided tonight would be best for both of your schedules, and you were chomping at the bit to get ready and get there. You’d never done anything casual like this, only professional interviews and somewhat press-related conversations. You had no idea what was going to happen in this video, except for the general idea of it being a Q&A between the four of you.

Driving to the meetup spot had your entire body on high alert, excited to meet the triplets, but also terrified to do so. You were a fangirl at heart, but you refused to show it. You pulled into the parking lot, looking around for the van.

The moment you saw it, you took a deep breath and pulled up next to it, frowning and looking around at the desolate parking lot. Before you could even fully get out of the car, Nick was opening the back door of the van and waving at you. You grinned and shut your door, locking your car out of habit and heading towards the van.

“Hey, it’s so nice to finally meet you!” Nick said, stepping out of the van and giving you a hug.

You chuckled and pulled away, shrugging your shoulders. “You too! I’m not gonna lie, I was nervous as hell on the drive over.” You said, following Nick’s lead and climbing into the van after him, awkwardly climbing over him. You looked at Matt and Chris, your smile wide as you nodded in acknowledgement. “Hey.”

“Why were you nervous?” Matt asked, your cheeks heating up as you shrugged your shoulders.

“I’m a big fan, and extremely awkward, if you couldn’t tell.” You said, the three of them laughing and adjusting themselves to face you.

“It’s totally fine, you should have seen Nick before you pulled up.” Chris said, Nick’s jaw dropping to the floor as you looked over at him with a similar expression. The conversation mellowed out shortly after that, your nerves dissipating as you got more comfortable.

“Okay, so here’s our idea.” Nick started, your eyes meeting his immediately. “You hide behind Chris’ seat while we introduce the video, and when we say we have a special guest, you pop up and introduce yourself.” He finished. You nodded your head, fighting your smile as you wedged yourself between Chris’ seat and the seat you were sitting in on the floor.

“Matt, go check the camera.” Nick said. You covered your mouth to avoid laughing at the ensuing argument.

“Nick, why do you never check the fucking camera, this is ridiculous.” Matt grumbled, climbing out of the car to check it. Nick looked down at you, raising his eyebrows and shaking his head. You snorted, and waited patiently for Matt to get back into the car.

“Alright. Today, we’re doing a Q&A, but we have a little surprise for everyone.” Chris said. He adjusted in his seat, you only knowing this because the movement pushed you into the other seat harshly. You couldn’t help but groan at the pressure of the seat against your side, smacking your hand over your mouth as Nick threw his head back and laughed.

“We have a special guest, if you couldn’t tell by Chris breaking her ribs. Come on out, reveal yourself.” Nick said. You shoved yourself out from behind the seat, your hand pressed against your side as the four of you laughed. “So, a video went viral of Y/n at one of her concerts challenging us to get her in a video.”

You scoffed and looked at Nick. “It wasn’t a challenge at all. Someone in the crowd had a sign that said I needed to be in a car video, and all I said was that the ball was in your court.” You defended playfully, Nick holding his hands up in mock defense. “I didn’t realize how insane that interview would go. I said I was a fan, and all of a sudden everyone was tagging me in your posts and telling me I needed to be in a video.” You said, shrugging your shoulders.

“Alright, introduce yourself to the video, and tell them if you have anything coming up, if you want.” You looked at Matt after he spoke, realization dawning on you as you nodded and finally looked at the camera.

“Oh, right. I’m Y/n. I just announced my new single Changes that comes out in a few days, go listen if you want.” You said, looking between the three of them to make sure that was alright. Chris chuckled and nodded, facing the camera and pulling his phone from his pocket.

“So, this Q&A is different for a few reasons. One; we have a special guest, which you already know. And two; we decided to ask her some questions, and she’s going to ask some questions that she has for us. We will be answering some fan questions as well, since we only came up with a handful of questions.” Chris said, Nick gesturing for him to speed up.

The video progressed with the four of you rapid fire asking questions about your careers and other random things, occasionally debating when someone said something the others thought was outrageous.

“How long have you been a fan of ours?” Chris asked. You met his eyes and felt your face heat up before you looked away quickly and shrugged.

“I saw a clip of one of your videos on Tiktok about a year ago, and looked that specific video up. It was the one where Nick’s yelling about a staff, I believe.” You said, Nick sighing and shaking his head.

Chris chuckled and nodded his head. “Nick yelling seems to be a common theme in people looking us up, so that makes sense.”

“When did you become a fan of mine?” You asked, Nick nearly dropping his drink as he put it into the cupholder. You laughed and braced yourself as Nick held up his hands.

“I found your first album by accident a few months after it came out, and I blasted it on repeat for weeks after that. I may have forced Matt and Chris to listen to it, but they fucked with it heavy, no matter what they say.” Matt rolled his eyes with a smile and grabbed his phone, scrolling through the questions.

“It’s not my type of music, but it definitely isn’t bad. The lyrics were definitely my favorite part, you’ve got a way with words.” Chris said, Matt nodding and meeting your eyes as well.

You blushed and smiled awkwardly. “Thank you, that means a lot. I always try to tell a story with my songs, so I’m glad that my lyrics show that.” Jesus, you couldn’t take a compliment to save your life.

A few more questions were asked and answered before Matt spoke up.

“This is a fan question; who’s your celebrity crush?” Matt read, dropping his phone into his lap and looking back at you. You looked up and thought for a moment before shrugging.

“I guess the easy answer is Ryan Gosling, or something, but I’m not exactly sure—oh! I take that back, Harry Styles for sure. I’d love to do a song with him, it’s been one of my dreams since I started making music.” You rambled, the three of them humming and nodding their heads. “What about you guys?”

Matt spoke first, his answer completely outrageous and out there. Nick refused to answer, and that’s when all three of you realized that Chris was silent. You looked at him, his eyes focused on the center console.

“Chris?” You asked. He looked up then, which is when you noticed his pink cheeks.

He shook his head. “I don’t want to answer this question, let's move on.” He said, turning to face forward again. You frowned and looked between Matt and Nick, who were staring at Chris confused.

“Why are you acting so weird—oh.” Nick said, the confusion on his face morphing into a sly smirk. “I see.” He said, looking at Matt. It took Matt a little longer to get there, but soon he was grinning and shoving Chris’ arm.

“Come on, Chris. Just say it.” He teased, your eyebrows furrowed as you looked between all of them.

“I have no idea what the fuck is happening, but alright.” You said, turning your attention to Chris. He shook his head and looked over at Matt.

“I’m not saying it, just move on.” He said, an amused smile on his lips.

“Why? Is it because she’s in the car?” Nick asked. Your face heated up immediately, your eyes meeting Chris’ shocked gaze. Matt smacked his hand over his mouth to cover up the laugh that nearly knocked him forward.

“Nick, cut that out.”

Nick’s laughter rang through the van as he fell backwards in his seat and shook his head, Chris’ embarrassed chuckle pushing past his lips as he looked at you one more time.

“You could have denied it!” Matt finally said, all four of you completely losing it and doubling over. You’d never laughed so hard in your life, and you were glad you agreed to do this.

Chris sat up and wiped at his eyes, the remnants of his laughter still showing on his face as he shook his head. “I could have denied it, but I’m not a liar.” He said, avoiding your eyes completely as he took a sip of his Pepsi. “So yeah, my celebrity crush is Y/n, sue me.”

Your mouth went dry, not expecting him to say it out loud so bluntly.

“Okay! Next question!” Nick said, pulling his phone out of his pocket. You shook your head and smiled as you waited for his question. He dropped his phone in his lap, a mischievous smile on his face as he gestured to you. “Who’s your favorite triplet?”

You groaned and threw your head back, looking forward again to see all three pairs of eyes glued to you intently. You blinked and looked between them, shaking your head when seeing their goofy smiles.

“I plead the fifth, absolutely not.” You said, all of them laughing and shaking their heads.

“Oh, come on! Just say it!” Matt said, resting his head on his hand and widening his eyes at you.

“No feelings will be hurt, just tell us.” Nick said, your eyes meeting his as you shook your head.

“It’s me, guys. It’s official.” Chris said, your head whipping in his direction. Your face felt like it was on fire as the silence continued and he held your gaze. Nick was the first to lose it, grabbing your arm as he dropped forward and laughed uncontrollably.

“What is with you two?! Just deny it or something!” He said, Matt and Chris joining in and covering their faces with their hands. You sighed and shook your head.

“I’m not a liar, either. Let’s move on.” You said, picking up your phone and going through your notes app.

“Favorite song, not just by me, any song in general.” You said, the conversation changing immediately. When everyone was done filming, you said your goodbyes and stepped out of the car. You weren’t expecting them all to jump out of the car as well.

“Do you mind taking a picture with us for our photo dump? It’s totally cool if not.” Nick asked.

“Oh! For sure, could I get a picture for my Instagram too?” They nodded, and you took a few pictures, some were serious and others were ridiculous. You each exchanged numbers, sending over the pictures that were taken on each of your phones. When the pictures were done and the four of you were just laughing at all of the photos, you looked at each of them. “I had a lot of fun! Thank you for having me.” You said, pulling Nick into a hug.

“Oh, of course! You should come hang out with us sometime, whenever you’re free.” He said as he pulled away. You nodded and accepted the hug from Matt, biting the inside of your cheek as your eyes met Chris’ after you pulled away.

He hesitated but shrugged his shoulders and held out his arms. You chuckled and walked towards him, wrapping your arms around him in a tight hug. Your heart was racing as you pulled away and smiled at him, hoping he didn’t notice the burning in your cheeks.

“Again, it was so nice to meet you. Text me if you ever want to make plans, okay?” You said, the three of them nodding and waving as you got into your car.

The drive back to your apartment was long, your exhaustion finally hitting you as you checked the dash and saw it was three in the morning. God, you were going to be exhausted at your meetings tomorrow. You finally pulled into the parking garage and got out of your car, locking the door as your phone vibrated in your pocket. It wasn’t until you laid in your bed and plugged in your phone that you checked the notification, your heart pounding as you read the text, a shocked laugh leaving your lips.

[cookiesupplier]

A Friend Down In Hell - Part One

pairing: Nick Folio x ofc (Ishtar)

warnings/tropes: slow burn, pining, idiot in love, language, drinking, mentions of violence, mentions of torture, mentions of religious mythology. (potentially more to be added)

summary: Folio can't quite tell you how long he's been dead, but it doesn't matter when he has friends like his, and Ishtar. Ishtar, with whom he fell in love the moment he met her. The problem? She doesn't know it. How does he convince a demon, who is practically immortal, to date him when he's dead? How did Ellie do it so easily?

author’s note: Story TWO of the Hell-Verse, Unbetaed.. I hope you are going to enjoy the ride that's starting!

tags: @spicywhenspeaking @tearfallpixie @cncohshit @nyxthedestroyerofworlds @lyschko666 @bngurngheart @lacktoesandtoddlerants @sorrowsofsilence @collapsedglasshouses @vinyardmauro @dsireland86 @4rtificialfolio @emmmm127 @badomensls

Folio doesn’t actually know how long he’s been dead, he knew technically, but time changes depending on where you're in Hell, especially when it comes to the punishment dimensions. Those assholes can speed up time to make a day out in the real world seem like a decade for the poor bastards under their ‘care’, and Folio knew that first-hand.

Thankfully, Noah had never been one of his jailers, because he wasn’t sure he could ever be so forgiving of the shit he was put through for his punishment. He might seem like the most easygoing guy in the world, but there was a fucking line, okay mate. Noah, well, he was sort of the BOSS man of the bloody prick that had been torturing him in those first days that Folio was in Hell. On one hand, Folio could hold a grudge in the early days of when Noah would have to oversee his torture, and seeing that demon face in the other dimension, on the other, as time wore on, he got the vindictive please of cackling mercilessly at the dick-wad every time he fucked up and Noah reprimanded him…

Sometimes in front of Folio.

He swore he saw the fucker smirk a little too. Funny feeling Noah wasn’t supposed to do that, reprimand his subordinates in front of their victims, hmmmm victims? Prisoners? Subjects? Whatever he was, considering he had been constantly told he was supposed to learn his lesson in how to be a better person, it had been hilarious watching that asshat get his ass torn a new one, the incompetent fuck. It helped that most of these kinds of interactions came around the time right before Folio had earned his transition to living in the Afterlife part of Hell, instead of being imprisoned in the punishment dimensions of Hell. Boy, seeing Noah once he was free had been a shock and a half!

He’d just might have freaked out, just a little, yelled he wasn’t going back, and broken his nose! Both Jolly and Nicholas had smirked and just sat there watching the scene while Noah pinched his bleeding nose, asking if he was done now, or did he wanted to try to his jaw too?

Folio had just blinked at him at the time, rather shocked that Noah was just sitting there, looking at him with his head tipped forward while he was pinching his nose tightly to stop it bleeding. Right, so, Folio had known how to handle a broken nose, he was a biker, and he’d gotten more than a few broken noses in his time, and fixed them. Anyone that tells you to tip your head backwards when you get a bloody nose was a fucking idiot, so seeing Noah tilt his head forward showed him that the man was smart. Not just because he was the one in charge of those other dimensions. No, you tipped your head forward, so the blood didn’t flow down the back of your throat from your nose and risk choking you to death.

Seeing Noah do that, Folio made the connection, that demons must be alive if they could be hurt and die, and Noah was protecting himself. Not that he was planning on doing anything, it was just, a curious thought. He had no intention of doing anything with it, but it was something he had wondered about the bastard that had tortured him in Hell time and time again. He had wondered at that moment if Noah knew that that asshole had enjoyed the vindictive nature of his position, sadly he learned later that he did, but not all demons had the right disposition for the ability to torture and punish the way they did. However, the fact that he actually enjoyed it, was the very reason why Noah would never allow him to advance any further in his position than he was already. The bastard, in question, was a very low-level demon in the rank of the punishment dimensions. Folio, had never ranked high on the punishment scale, that demon had just always been a bastard, which was why Folio had sadly landed with him. Asshole, unfortunate, but, it was where he ended up.

So, the long and the short of it, he didn’t know for sure how long for him it had been since he’d been dead, thanks to the fact that torturous asshole had liked to play with the flow of time to mess with him, Folio did know that it had been almost five years, give or take a few, since he had been free of him. He’d been living free and clear in Hell and enjoying his life, it was a party, and he loved it here. Living in Hell, you wanted for nothing after all.

Folio wouldn’t lie. Even though he had been in Hell for a while in the punishment dimensions, it had still been a massive culture shock changing from them to living peacefully in Hell with the others. He hated to admit, that some of the demons had made him a little bit wary at first, but accepting people for who they were, wasn’t one of the lessons he had had to learn when he came to hell, and that hadn’t taken him long to adjust.

Good food, good booze, gorgeous women, what more could a guy want right?

He even had the most fucking amazing motorcycle that he had built himself from scratch. When he was alive he’d had a Harley-Davidson, which, unfortunately, had been the machine that he’d totalled, and had gotten himself killed with. Here, now, this baby was pure Hell-Born, yep, Hell had its own brand, which was fucking awesome if you asked him and Folio thrived tinkering around with it! It was so much fun! His bike was a thing of beauty, he loved working on her. Almost as much of a beauty as Ishtar.

Ishtar.

The best part of being in Hell, not being in the punishment dimensions, was Ishtar.

Folio had taken one look at Ishtar and fallen head over heels in love with that woman. Demoness. Love of his life. She was EVERYTHING. She was a purple-skinned beauty of a demon, and if anyone thought that they challenged her for his heart, they had another thing coming.

Not that she knew that.

Nope.

Jolly never let him forget it, either.

Made fun of him for it constantly.

He asked out and went out with other women constantly, they were fine, they were easy going, and they were fun to go out with, but Ishtar was different. Flirting with her was fun, and it was great, but going out with her, he knew he would crash and burn, and he’d destroy any hope he’d have of her falling absolutely and irrevocably in love with him. No. He had to get her in the perfect position, he had to ease her into the world of Folio.

Jolly just rolled his eyes at him over it.

Folio just ignored him, so what he’d been flirting with her for ages, he would get there, he had time, it wasn’t like he was going anywhere any time soon now was it? This was Hell!

Spinning around in a circle, it was a quiet morning in the soul intake office, at least the one they were running, Folio used to wonder how many of them there were because he knew countless souls were coming through Hell at any given time, but they barely handled few. However, the more he thought about it, the more his head just went in circles, until he decided that he’d rather just not know.

“Yo, Ellie, J-man,”

He chuckled, literally feeling Jolly’s unappreciative stare at the nickname when he said it,

“Okay, Jolly, how about it, who is up for coming out to the bar tonight? I feel like a night out on the town… up for some fun with me?”

Looking to the pair, hopeful that they might agree to go.

“Could rope Nick and Noah into it, come onnnnnn?”

Grinning wide, ever since Ellie made up with Noah though, if either of them agreed, then Folio was pretty sure that if one was going to the bar, the other would too. Not only had Noah not been big on letting her out of his sight lately, after her disappearing for a week, his Noah’s entourage seeing him there without her, oh it would be a field day, they’d be on him like wild fucking piranhas. Folio sometimes worried what would happen to any of those girls if Ellie found out one of them tried something with Noah. He’d had seen her getting quite good with her bat lately, not to mention, from what he heard, that Noah was still training her with other kinds of weapons. Fun times.

Scratch that, he wasn’t worried about what would happen to them. He was more worried about whether Ellie would feel guilty after. Anything they got they would deserve, especially after taking a shot at a demon lord when he was so openly involved with someone, to the level he was with Ellie. They would have it coming. However, souls here, and dealing with someone like that, are two very different things. Folio hoped Ellie wouldn’t actually have to deal with that.

Jolly shook his head slightly looking over to Folio and, Ellie not even answering before she was looking towards Jolly with his expression, wondering what was going on,

“What’s up with you?”

His attention switched from Folio to Ellie’s quizzical look, as Folio pointedly ignored the judgement written all over his oldest friend's face. He might have technically known Noah longer, but he’d been friendly with Jolly longer, mostly because the time he knew Noah longer than Jolly, the man had been the Boss-man of the guy making his life a literal, living hell, so he wasn’t counting that to his friendship quota, thank you!

“He is going into withdrawals.”

That was all he said however and Folio just rolled his eyes, Ellie looking between the pair, wondering what it was they knew and she didn’t. Sure, she’d been around for months, but there were still things that she was learning about her friends, about Hell. Even Folio, who had been around for years on top of his time in punishment, could still learn new things here and there, so who the fuck knew everything around here. He wasn’t even sure if the demons knew everything… no one knew everything, not even the demon lords! Not that he’d put it past Noah to claim he did, but Folio would flip him off for trying, though.

They probably all would, for that matter.

Now Ellie was looking at him with scrutiny, probably trying to figure out what Jolly meant when it became obvious that he wasn’t about to explain any further, and Folio just looked at her with a raised eyebrow,

“Come on, you know we all have fun when we go out, what's the harm?”

Grinning at her, his smile was wide, and bright, hopeful as he tried to convince her to come out with him, sure, he could go out on his own tonight, but it just wasn’t the same. Especially considering if he did go out on his own it would be so much more obvious why he was there, well, one of the reasons he was there. He did like hanging out with his friends too, Folio always liked hanging out with his friends, he was always up for that! Honestly, the only thing that could beat hanging out with his friends would be a night out with a beautiful lady, one in particular came to mind, but that was something else entirely.

Either way, he never went to the bar alone, never, Ishtar might ask questions!

“Eeelliiiieeeeee…. Pleeeaassseeeeee?”

He was not to proud to beg? He wasn’t… Jolly wasn’t wrong, not that he was about to admit it, but he missed his Ishtar time, he missed that gorgeous face, getting lost in the wondrous joy of her eyes, and he just knew if he ever dared to touch those lips of hers, they’d be… ahem, nope, nope he wasn’t getting distracted from his goal now. Not when his plan to get to see her, and spend time talking to her tonight was still within his reach.

“So, Ellie, how about it, bestest, ever, pal? Come onnnn?”

Looking towards her with raised eyebrows expectantly waiting as she dragged out the answer, she was doing it on purpose, he swore it, torturing him, not that he didn’t torment her right back every chance he got.

“Fine, bring Noah?”

The groan he got at the question,

“Can we skip the shot challenges Folio? Please, dragging you home passed out on the floor, and my boyfriend so drunk he thinks it would be too ungentlemanly to take advantage of me, is not my idea of a good time.”

Jolly however was chuckling from the other side of the room, Folio rolling his eyes at him, enough with that, he was just happy she agreed

“I told you, withdrawals.... you’ll figure it out. Eventually.”

Divider by @saradika-graphics

[thishazbinamistake]

*Mild spoilers*

I watched the first episode, so here are my kind of disjointed thoughts if anyone is interested in hearing them:

So first off, I thought it was okay visually. I tried to ignore the weird animation errors, like how in one scene I noticed Charlie has five fingers on one of her hands instead of her usual four, and that they never fixed that one scene where Vaggie just... disappears in the background (you know the one), because I try not to be too harsh the animators for these sorts of things. But it definitely felt amateurish in places. Other than that, Viv definitely wasn't lying when she said it looked "fine". I've seen worse, for sure.

The voice acting ranges from pretty good to honestly terrible. Stephanie sounded like she could not give less of a shit about being there, and had some weird annunciation, making her kind of hard to understand in places. I was optimistic about Keith, and he sounded great, but honestly did not fit the character of Husk very well. Charlie was actually quite good, she has a great singing voice and overall I thought Erika did a good job for her. Alastor was decent, Amir definitely did a better job than I was expecting, considering how iconic Edward's performance was in the pilot. Niffty didn't talk nearly enough in the first episode for me to even form an opinion on her voice acting, but she's fine, I guess? Katie is literally just Brandon Rogers doing his Brandon Rogers voice.

Blake was super annoying, and he did not make Angel's constant sex jokes endearing or funny in the slightest. For the record, I didn't even like pilot Angel in the first place, but now, compared to this, I'm honestly starting to miss him. And I'm not even going to touch that "this body was made to be exploited" line with a ten foot pole.

Adam, though... God, he was easily the worst part of this first episode. His surfer-dude voice was annoying as shit, and his lines were so cringeworthy. He is not an entertaining or engaging villain in the slightest. Literally, every time he was on screen I was just waiting desperately for the scene to change.

In the first episode, we hardly get any glimpse into the personalities of honestly most of the characters besides Adam and maybe Angel, which is unfortunate because they're the two most annoying characters.

With Lucifer and Lilith's backstory, in typical Vivzie fashion, Lucifer is the sad uwu boy while Lilith is treated as being the one responsible for everything. Not really surprising.

As for the writing, it's 30% boring exposition, and 70% unfunny sex jokes. Literally most of Adam's dialogue is sex related. I hate him so much it's unreal.

And the songs... they sounded fine, but they don't feel like something you would want to casually listen to on their own. They just feel like they're meant to be transitions from one scene to the next and nothing more.

For as little as we saw her, I think my favorite part of the first episode was Niffty. She's honestly a super cute and fun character, and the scenes with her were the few times I actually cracked a smile. She's such a little freak and I love her. Everyone else was either boring or made me want to shove a screwdriver in my ears.

Finally, one of the most glaring issues to me (aside from Adam) is that the show didn't really give much of a setup for what was happening. We got a little exposition about Lucifer and Lilith and the fall of man and all that, but aside from Charlie, we aren't reintroduced to any of the characters from the pilot. This feels like a really dumb move because it's alienating to new viewers. If you were someone with no knowledge of the pilot scrolling through Amazon Prime looking for a new show to watch, and Hazbin caught your eye, you'd probably get confused about who all these characters are and what it is they're actually doing, so you'd probably just click off and look for something different. It's obvious the writers just assumed that everyone watching had already seen the pilot, I guess because they think only longtime fans would be interested in the show, which is honestly really sad. You'd think they'd want to try and grow their audience more, but it just feels like they only want to pander to the people who are already fans, which feels like a bad desicion from both a storytelling standpoint as well as a business one. A show, especially one that migrated from an internet pilot to a full series on a paid streaming platform, should be able to stand on its own two legs without needing the pilot to do all the explaining. Especially considering the designs and voice actors changing between the pilot and the series. I didn't expect them to completely remake the pilot, but they could have at least done a better job establishing the characters.

All in all, episode one was at best a 5/10. Like I said, I've seen far worse but this just felt like a bad note to start this all off on. For newcomers, it's confusing and downright unappealing, and for longtime fans it's just disappointing. I can really only see diehard Vivzie fans getting a ton of enjoyment out of it.

Still need to watch episode two, maybe things will improve from there.

[stickyspeckledlight]

lol have you ever thought about what your readers would be like if they were playable?

hmmm, i only really have one reader, which is onset reader who is, well. no hate but kinda a wimp u know. listen.

they were able to delay ONE mental breakdown (doing the gamble w/ aven) but at the same time, they could sort of consolidate with the fact that they thought they were gonna die, so then there would be an end to look forward to. but also note this: that scene is ENTIRELY from their perspective. I'll just say maybe a tear or two, a shake, or freeze went entirely unnoticed by them, y'know? (aventurine didn't interject too much with that because. well. he can't say he minds seeing them crumple, F).

And, realistically, they would much rather blow themselves up than kill someone. even post-onset after the cotton fields have been uprooted, they still aren't gonna just wanna kill someone. for the most part. if it involves aventurine, they will change their tune pretty quickly, but like, that's not unique to killing ppl lmao. they are indeed koo koo krazy but its a bit more layered than "I will become murderhobo for you anyways here's the head of that guy you talked to for 0.5 seconds." I'll stop there since I do intend on exploring their psyche in a fic eventually.

Anyway, as I've said: realistically, they would much prefer running away or blowing themselves up than directly confront an opponent. ofc, if really pushed, they will begin to fight back and lash out, but like....even before aventurine and stuff happened, I'll just say their mindset crippled them in a LOT of ways. as evident, their mind will always circle back to what's the most self destructive and ideally it'll be something they can do to "take them down with me." so yeah. blowing themselves up is perfect. kill themselves and kill their enemies, destroying themselves and leaving the rest of the world with the fallout.

BUT. that's not very fun. you came for gameplay. and I'm a meta slave. so let's get right to it. note that this is purely imaginary, and wouldn't really work in this fic's universe---BUT I DON'T CARE. WE ARE GONNA BE GIVING ONSET READER THE KIT THEY DESERVE. hell maybe I should do this with all my readers LMFAO.

(Long post because I’m figuring this out as I go, but if you wanna skip the jargon just skip to the bottom of the post lmao)

Firstly, let's start with some basic criteria/restraints:

Their ideal teammate should be Aventurine (for obvious reasons)

They should also be Aventurine's ideal teammate, or at the very least they boost his own performance in some way

In other words, Onset!Reader’s kit should enhance Aventurine’s kit, but also in some ways have their own kit be greatly (almost dependent wink wink) on having him in the team. Not impossible to play without him but…definitely struggling to muster any semblance of life without his presence….feeling empty and dead…heheh

Ok. Back to work.

With these restraints in mind, what should Onset!Reader’s role be? They can’t be a sustain, since Aventurine already does that; and having them be a full on support or harmony would mean I’d have to tune them to fit aventurine exactly, and as funny as that is, not very poggers game design IMO.

Well, I think that these two paths, which fit them well, are a good place to start:

1. Destruction

2. Nihility (explanation: they are generally slothful and like. They were definitely having really negative nihilistic thoughts especially during that “transition” period. Also, if it wasn’t obvious, there are the Self-Annihilators.)

However, I think after mulling it over, Destruction seems like the way to go, with some Nihility elements in their kit (sort of like how huohuo is an abundance, but also a pseudo-harmony with her ult regen energy and atk buff).

So, then, with that, they are a DPS! Or at least a subdps, because we also wanna boost Aventurine’s own kit, right? Probably with some debuffing in their kit, so a subdps pseudo support like topaz. What element they are doesn’t really matter, so let’s say they’re ice. We could use more ice damage dealers bc I don’t wanna use yanqing anymore.

This game hates Arlan, so it will be fitting to give Onset!Reader HP drain in their kit. Goes with the self destructive tendencies nicely, as well as making Aven’s shields really crucial to keeping them alive. Arlan L

But here’s what they specifically do to drain their HP: they hit their skill and do some damage, but in the process, they drain their HP and then deal a little damage to some of team. Not specifically an HP drain like Jingliu, just directly hits their team; that way it counts as adding stacks to Aven’s FUA tally. Maybe they don’t deal dmg to the entire time (at least at E0 kekw), and so like maybe they can only deal dmg to one other character and themselves…..I imagine that the skill would then work as self targeting then, and the best way to get more stacks of Aven’s shield is to put them right next to each other…for gameplay, ofc. Aven eating up those 3 free stacks he gets every turn from them.

But now, we gotta figure something else out: their talent, or FUA. How is it triggered?

I’m thinking of something like this: they skill, which launches their FUA, however, this FUA is “unenhanced.” Like how topaz’s skill is a numby FUA, their skill launches their own FUA (aoe). However, whenever someone else launches their FUA (like Aventurine), or if they’ve taken enough hits or hp loss, an “enhanced” FUA is unleashed, which does a just a little more dmg, but more importantly, applies a debuff to enemies, reducing their ice res as well as res to the element of other FUAs which hit them, albeit to a lesser extent (ex. Reader uses FUA and applies debuff, and then Aven launches his FUA which then reduce’s the enemy’s imaginary res; or Jing Yuan launches his FUA and enemy’s lightning res is reduced, and so on). Tho maybe we don’t really need to FUA requirement as a hardline here, since then they’d just be a discount Topaz? So maybe something like: reduce enemy RES occurs if they are hit with a FUA or an ULT.

Look this is kinda bonkers but to be fair. HSR is already pseudo power creeping so I’m only following the trends.

Alright, so we’ve got their skill & talent. We need their ult now. Honestly nothing too fancy, just a aoe or blast ult which also restores a little HP, and maybe some self buffing???

I think they’ll need to give themselves some spd or action forwards so they can launch their FUAs a bit more consistently. Let’s link this to their HP to increase the dependency on Aventurine keeping them alive

This also makes the synergy better even if you wanna use Gepard because remember: shields are based on turns taken. So even if you wanna use Gepard you’re gonna have to be careful with your timing, or use an abundance in exchange for less actions and then so less FUAs, decreasing their dmg. Bc their skill can grant Aven blind bet stacks, he can still sustain them while not sacrificing their own dmg.

Ok, so let’s put their kit into words (don’t make fun of my cringe ass names ok I’m really bad at names). I might also add some extra stuff here just because lmao.

DESTRUCTION, ICE

Basic: Razed Field: Scales with HP (literally the only way they don’t die w/o a shielder)

Skill: Salting Fields, Held So Dear: Targets self and ally, dealing minor ice dmg and drains Reader’s HP. The ice dmg dealt by the skill will count as ally’s being attacked. Grants 1 stack of Cracking Sunset.

Ult: Dawn’s Afterglow, Crimson Pooling Beneath: Increases Crit DMG by 20%. Deals AoE blast ice dmg and restore Reader’s HP by a certain percent. Grants 3 stacks of Cracking Sunset.

Talent: Bleeding Heart, Fermenting in the Sun: When Reader reaches 3 stacks of Cracking Sunset, launch a FUA , dealing AoE ice dmg. Enemies hit with FUA will be inflicted with Weeping Ink for 2 turns. Enemies w/ Weeping Ink will have their Ice RES reduced by 20%.

Traces:

A2: I Weep Tears of Joy: FUAs launched by allies grant 2 stacks of Cracking Sunset. Allies who trigger their ultimate will grant 1 stacks of Cracking Sunset.

A4: I Crave A Poison So Delectable: When HP is not full, increases SPD. Increases further if below 50%

A6: I Dance in a Meadow: When allies launch a FUA or Ult against an enemy inflicted with Weeping Ink, decreases the Elemental RES of the attacking ally’s Element by 60% of the Ice RES decrease granted by Weeping Ink.

Eidolons:

E1: Salted Cotton Stew: The Ultimate will grant the team a 25% def boost and 12% crit rate boost.

E2: Crumbled Chocolate Tower: Whenever HP decreases, action is advanced forward by 15%

E4: Champagne, Bubbling Holes Down the Throat: The skill targets the entire team. Each ally hit by the skill is grants a stack of Satiated. Each stack of Satiated grants a 8% FUA dmg boost, stacking up to 4 times.

E6: Casu Martzu: Weeping Ink additionally decreases all Elemental RES of enemies by an amount equal to the Ice RES decrease of Weeping Ink. The additional Ice RES decrease of Weeping Ink, as well as the Elemental RES decreases of trace “I Dance In A Meadow”, will stack on top of this Elemental RES decrease.

What are their animations? Uh, idk. They throw a bunch of shit. Maybe the cover the enemies in blankets so their movement is inhibited. And then throw more random shit they find laying around. Uh yeah. There. All of the destruction is caused by haphazardly thrown plushies and scrunchies and baseballs.

And since their kit is bonkers anyway let’s give them a light cone too because why the hell not. Yea yea they would be more like a 4 star but 5 stars are more fun to design Im afraid.

5* Destruction, The Sweetest Thing

Shattered Porcelain: Increases wearer’s crit rate by 16% (28%). Grants a stack of “Moonlight’s Shadow” when wearer deals dmg to allies and self, boosting dmg dealt by 15% (35%), up to 2 stacks for each ally hit. When wearer uses ult, grants 15% (27%) DEF ignore.

“Are you having doubts?” A gloved hand stacks a chip.

“No...” They pursue their lips, regarding the challenger hobbling out, a young man, with an empathetic gaze. But pity and sympathy are nowhere to be found, even if cotton did not flower. “If anything, you should wrap up. It’s late. Here. Let me help you with your coat.”

“That’s it? You know you can tell me anything.” They imagine his fingers coiling around their heart like a boa constrictor.

They coax him off the couch, and help him with his jacket just as they said. “You’ve sent the house running. Staying here’s pointless now.” They pause. “And best to turn in for the day, don’t you think?”

The man smiles. “Aren’t you just the sweetest thing?” A small piece of chocolate slides into their mouth: sugary sweet, sorrowfully bitter, and resigningly sour.

lol but they’d be really good with Jade lmao. They could be good with Blade too. But if you wanna see bonkers number and an insane amount of attacks them + Aventurine is the way to go. Honestly something like Reader, Aven, Jade, Robin/RM/Topaz could be pretty dang good.

LMFAO in the ipc dream team they can just replace ratio if there’s a ton of ice weakness. Like. No. That’s not your boyfriend. I AM and just kicks ratio outta there. But he will be much better in single target than them lmao.

Wait pela would be pretty good too lol. The discount harmony you use with them rofl

This was pretty fun! Had a blast working on this throughout the. Uhhh. Idk. Week? I forgot the pandemic has made my sense of time foggy.

[cctinsleybaxter]

Furiosa thots!!! Putting under a readmore since it only just came out and i don't want to dissuade people from going. I find it kinda funny I find it kinda sad (I lowkey hated it but the war rig scene made me go stupid aaaa)

Stuff I liked:

Pacing and sound design. Was really skeptical of the 2+ hour runtime but it went by quick and plotting made sense

Costuming! Any time a practical effect or something textured is onscreen (which is not always. bodes well for the 'stuff i hated' section) is awesome; I don't care if it looks stupid or doesn't make sense it's a pleasure to have in class.

Arm backstory

This car

I went in thinking 'sigh well they're never going to beat robert de niro exploding that helicopter in midnight run' and then the war rig scene happened; I was going crazy!!! I loved it from beginning to end. I actually gasped because I'd noticed the grey mass of cloth being used as a flag at the first encampment and thought 'that's my favorite thing they've shown so far' (i was going to say prop but idk that it was practical); WELCOME BACK GREY CLOTH

Chris Hemsworth was somehow my favorite performance, I felt like he nailed the combination of goofy/ridiculous and scary/threatening

Stuff I didn't like:

George Miller uses bible allegories and imagery like he's the fucking Ultraman guy (Eiji Tsuburaya.) Why make posts about how fascinated you are by 'the japanese' using catholic imagery when we got that egregious crucifixion setup. Australians are culpable.

We don't learn anything about furiosa as a person that can't already be gleaned from Fury Road. I do think this does a pretty admirable job of storytelling for a prequel, we learn about what happened to Furiosa and we (sort of) get the character development that led her to take the wives with her, but I wish it'd been a brand new character's story

I like Anya Taylor-Joy and disagree with people saying this was a miscast because she can't act and is only suited to play models (misogyny takes many forms...), but I do think she's best in roles with a lot of speaking and micro-expressions, so playing a woman who barely speaks or emotes and will later become charlize theron just wasn't it. I'm also legitimately worried about how skinny she is rn

Stuff I hated:

This movie looked like absolute garbage in comparison to the rest of the mad maxes; even the ones I think are irredeemably bad. The combination of whatever frame rate they were using and the CGI was just. Ugh.

Scene transitions (so many fades to black) and montage (specifically thinking about the sped-up footage of them assembling the rig, Furiosa's Lion King dream sequence, and 'the horrors of war') were a hot mess

Framing dementus's anarcho-fascism as worse than immortan joe's regular fascism is such a misstep it casts a shadow over the whole movie. Yeah the hedonist with the working class accent who hates art and is too stupid/selfish to run a territory yadda yadda. It's very Stephen King villain, which would be fine!, but Fury Road had such good politics it just felt tired

You're telling me that a woman who spent her childhood kidnapped and threatened with rape (interesting that said threat only comes from individual extra bad guys btw; both evil men-dominated societies accept slavery and rape but condemn pedophilia) falls for her male coworker and mentor figure. You're telling me this is a compelling relationship between two victims of the same system. You're telling me you filmed it like a YA dystopian romance. You're telling me her backstory is that she showed a guy her most treasured and vulnerable possession, a seed from the fruit she plucked before being taken from eden and losing her innocence, and he bade her keep it by putting his big-ass yaoi hand over hers, and that's what solidified their trust. You're telling me she doesn't once speak to a woman who isn't her mom. Can we die? Can we go to the wasteland?

[writingmaidenwarrior]

Sin Eaters Part 9

Yeah, I finally managed to finish this part. I can't believe it. Too much jumping around scenes on my side recently. Have some funny new thing @cljordan-imperium

Stretching her fingers, Talindra looked down on the tactical bracelet they all wore when they are out in official matters. The magic it held always made her itchy and she could see from the corner of her eyes same went for Wynthan.

“Itchy, eh?”

“Yeah, the magic collides with ours”, he sighed.

She understood what he meant with ours. The horned one magic, not magic in general. Other magic users in her company never lamented about it and the doctors always calmed her down with this being just a sensitivity to the magic. If they would have known. A bitter laugh escaped her.

“You alright?”

“Yeah, just thinking about how the meds always said I was just too sensitive to its magic.”

A moment later Wynthan joined the bitter laugh and nodded with an eyeroll.

“In some way it is true but not for the reason they thought.”

“Yeah, the only one I knew who also lamented about it itching was Eshfyrr…. Wait…”

The browns knitted together she stopped and glanced up to Wynthan as they walked down the path to the main street up to the portal.

“I need to catch him during training the first chance we get.”

Wynthan’s smirk was weird, but Talindra realized why it was there the moment she heard footsteps close by as they reached the main street to the portal.

“Tal!”

Eshfyrr came running with a broad smile, also in civilian clothes but wearing the tactical bracelet. Right behind him was his partner Ylvante, who slowly strolled behind him.

“Not so fast, we aren’t going anywhere”, she laughed.

Eshfyrr slowed down in time right before he crashed into Wynthan.

“Sorry guys, I just wanted to take the chance to greet you. Where are you going?”

“Archives. Trying to find some info about my family.”

“What a lucky coincidence”, Ylvante stated in a calm voice but there was a knowing smile towards Wynthan.

“You too?”, Wynthan took the ball he got thrown to Talindra’s surprise.

She pulled Eshfyrr aside and watched whatever would unfold between those horned ones.

“Yes, we are also on our way. Eshfyrr and I came to the conclusion, since we have a lot of time at hand, we can use it to find info on his family since his parents were Sin Eaters. I assume same counts for you, Talindra?”

“Yeah, but wait a second… Esh, you never said a word. I told you all the way.”

Sheepishly Eshfyrr rubbed his neck and looked aside while Talindra tried to find his eyes.

“I didn’t know myself. I puzzled it together with Ylvante’s help yesterday. I only knew I was adopted.”

“I suggest we should go. The earlier we arrive, the faster we get access. We can sort out the rest there.”

The pragmatism in Ylvate was somewhat unsettling but Talindra had to admit he was right. He raised his hands and hushed them all back on the path.

Like little ducklings they continued their way to the transit portal. As unsuspicious as she could Talindra watched Wynthan and Ylvante. There was some strange tension she felt but couldn’t name and she was curious what it was about.

Her thoughts got disrupted by Eshfyrr grabbing her arm and smiling at her.

“Wondering who your parents were?”

His excitement was sweet and innocent. She looked up to Ylvante who noticed her gaze and gently shook his head. He clearly was aware she knew more.

“Honestly, I am curious if there are any relatives left. You know my aunt and uncle died during the east wall incident years ago. They never talked about any siblings or their parents.”

“The east wall incident?”, Ylvante repeated astonished, “Wasn’t it the breakdown of the safety wall when some low-class monster ran against it and rampaged through the living quarters?”

“Yes, I had been dispatched in the North to clear out a camp of monster that came too close and only learned about it when I was back.”

“When exactly did this happen?”, Wynthan asked with a glance Talindra already knew to read as he had a thought.

“About seven years ago. It was during my first year after I signed my ten years contract with the defense unit. Ever since then I only stayed at the quarters when back in the city when I am not out with comrades.”

She shrugged it off, but his look didn’t change and even Ylvante wore a similar one. Eshfyrr threw her a questioning glance, but Talindra could only shrug. Ignoring the whole thing was the best option now, so she activated the portal and hit the symbol for the archives on the panel in front of her.

“You coming?”

The smirk on Wynthan was the only response as he stepped next to her and grabbed her hand to pull her with him. It wasn’t clear if it was his action or the portal that send those funny tingling sensations through her, but Talindra decided for the sake of her sanity it was the portal.

A few second later they stood on the huge place in front of the archives on the other side of the city on top of everything right next to the halls of the triumvirates. The closeness to the latter ones sent a cold chill through her as she remembered how the whole raffle was rigged and what their shadowy planes with the Sin Eaters were. Wynthan squeezed her hand as if he could read her mind and tucked gently towards the huge doors of the archives.

The moment was over when Eshfyrr and Ylvate stepped out of the portal behind them.

“Eternals blessed me, that is impressive”, Eshfyrr stated barely above a whisper.

“Don’t exaggerate like this”, Talindra teased him.

She turned around and found Ylvante had wrapped his arms around Eshfyrr from behind and softly nudged him to move ahead. Before she could acknowledge it, she felt Wynthan pull her towards the doors, making her stumble the first steps in the progress. Giggling she followed and threw herself into his side.

“Jealous again?”, she mouthed and got a huff in response.

The barely visible nod towards the doors was enough to know he would tell her once they were inside and on their own. Slowly the morning became weirder and weirder.

Behind the huge wooden doors was an equally huge entrance hall with multiple desks. It was almost sterile in this light grey and beige coloring with even the desks being of some light grey stone. They picked the closes one and stepped in front of it. The middle-aged man looked up with a sigh.

“How can I help you?”

“I like to have access to the Sin Eater archives and the civilian logs.”

He tilted his head with a frown as his gaze went to her bracelet and then to Wynthan with his horns. A tired huff followed, and he pushed some device over the counter.

“Put your bracelet over it. It will add the access to the part of the archives your security level allows you. It will be the requested archives and the history archives. The doors will open for you as long as you have your bracelets with you.”

“Uhm, well thank you.”

Confused Talindra looked up to Wynthan who was equally astonished about how fast and easy it went. Once her bracelet glowed for a moment as reaction to the new information getting fed to it, she took her arm away and step aside for Wynthan. A desk over Eshfyrr and Ylvante went through the same procedure. Eshfyrr was first and she motioned to Wynthan she took the chance to talk to him for a moment.

As Talindra walked by him, she grabbed her friend by his wrist and pulled him towards the next door where they would be heading anyway. In a movement as she wanted to playfully ruffle his hair she went straight to the area where horns would be if her thoughts about him earlier were right.

Eshfyrr’s eyes widened in shock when he realized what she was about to do but couldn’t say anything in this surrounding beside playing along. For a second, she felt bad for being a little manipulative in this moment, but she needed to know fast and smirked when the well-known rough sensation of filed down horns hit her fingers.

She continued the movement to ruffle his hair and hugged him tight.

“Don’t worry. I am like you”, she whispered into his ear.

Eshfyrr went from stiff in panic to melting in relive in from one breath to the other in her arms and hugged her back.

“Does he know?”

“Yeah. And he?”

“Yeah.”

Both laughed relieved and amused. Slowly they let go of each other only to face two questioning glances. Talindra and Eshfyrr nodded toward each other in silent agreement to share their newfound knowledge later.

“You will learn soon, Natty-boy. Come, we have an awful lot of work ahead.”

“I need to have a word with you about calling me this”, Wynthan snickered.

“Admit it, you like it.”

With a bump of her hips against his she stepped through the door. Behind her she heard the other laugh at her.

“Is she always like this?”, Ylvante asked.

“This is the toned-down version”, Eshfyrr chuckled what caused a pained groan from Wynthan.

A part of her hoped he imagined what the version of her looked like when she went in full force. The huge plate ahead of them took Talindra’s full attention and she walked faster to see where they needed to go. Concentrated on the various floors and wings she didn’t notice Wynthan coming up behind her until he growled into her ear.

“Didn’t you want to behave?”

“I behave. Within my normal behavior.”

“Devil you.”

Eshfyrr cleared his throat next to them with a smile and nodded to the plate.

“Looks like we need only the East Wing. Everything is there. Second and forth floor.” 

“We should start with the Civilian records on the fourth floor”, Talindra suggested, “Without having our parents names we won’t get anywhere.”

“Look more closely”, Ylvante pushed with a strange tone, “The Civilian logs are on second and third floor, the Sin Eater logs fourth and fifth. I would suggest since we need information of the newer kind to start at fifth floor.

Wynthan behind her took a deep breath as to calm himself but kept silent. Awful silent for him if Talindra compared it to the previous day.

“Then let’s head to the fifth.”

They moved over to the elevators and stopped a little surprised. It was only big enough for three of them because of Wynthan’s and Ylvante huge built. Eshfyrr and Talindra stepped inside with big grins.

“You need to decide who rides up with us”, Eshfyrr joked.

Before Wynthan could suggest something, Ylvante stepped a few steps back and motioned to him to enter.

“How generous of you. See you upstairs.”

Talindra used the moment to check the elevator for any signs of being bugged. Her glance to Wynthan said he did the same.

“It’s safe, I guess. The whole building is.”

“No bugs?”, Eshfyrr asked to be sure.

Talindra smiled as she saw how he nervously chewed on the corner of his lower lip.

“No bugs or any other devices. Apparently, the archives aren’t interesting enough”, Wynthan stated amused but turned slightly to Eshfyrr, “I like to ask you for a favor. I know from Tal’s reaction you are like her. I know Ylvante longer than you and until he proves he has changed I don’t trust him to have this information.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Me neither”, Talindra joined her comrade’s confusion.

“He is a rat. He will do anything to get better accommodation, treated better, get better food or whatever. He was most of the time the reason the members in our trainings company had to do extra training.”

The icy feeling this revelation brought run through her whole body and she felt her face turn to stone.

“Extra training?”

“Torture to brainwash them”, Talindra explained instead of Wynthan.

The moment she said it, Eshfyrr’s expression changed to unreadable.

“He didn’t tell any of this.”

“There is a lot he likely didn’t tell”, Wynthan stated.

The escalator door opened, and they stepped outside.

“So much?”

There was something in Eshfyrr Talindra always loved about him: How fast he adjusted to new information.

“If you want, I try to get in contact with some horned one elders to learn more about all this.”

“Let me know when you got a day. I want to come with you.”

“I will. I just need your information where you live.”

Eshfyrr raised his finger and with a speed she rarely saw and even made Wynthan huff surprised, he opened the menu of his tactical bracelet and opened his personal information. Talindra held her bracelet over it and checked if the data got copied.

“Gotcha. Like this we also can better coordinate our training. I need to get Kylantha next.”

“That would be helpful indeed. Training in groups, even if we can’t be sure we will form a squad will at least help find a rhythm within a squad frame. Our life depends way too much in this out there.”

With a worried look out of the window Wynthan stated it.

“We get the other’s info as soon as we can. It is a surprise we don’t have them anyway. Like he said, training in a squad already gets a feeling for how things work”, Eshfyrr mused aloud.

Slowly they wandered a few steps away from the escalator.

“Maybe they wanna see who gets to training by themselves, what groups form and so on. All these little psychological games they always play.”

The men nodded slowly at Talindra’s words.

“Would make some weird sense.”

“What would make sense?”, Ylvante stepped out of the escalator with an unreadable face.

“The higher up not giving us the personal information of the other new Sin Eaters to see what groups form by itself”, Talindra repeated thoughtful.

Ylvante snickered the first time since she met him and stepped in front of her.

“Worried about a friend?”, he bent down with a small smile.

For some reason she couldn’t pinpoint it felt like he was interrogating her. She raised an eyebrow at him and huffed, making herself as tall as possible.

“No, worried about staying alive and how to archive it when we can’t train with the others to get to know how they fight, what their abilities are and so on.”

His smile faltered and he straightened up again with an unreadable face.

“That is true. I suggest we should use today for research and see tomorrow the trainings arena and wait who shows up as well.”

“Sounds fair”, Wynthan stated.

Surprised he had stepped next to her at some point, Talindra looked up at him. Behind Ylvante she could see Eshfyrr grin about it like a schoolboy.  As cover he opened the map they got on his bracelet interface and studied it.

“Since Tal and I are 28 and 27 years old, I think we should start with the records going back about 35 years?”

“Do you even have a name to look for?”, Talindra asked him.

His rapid blinking was all she needed to know.

“Oh, I think I should start with the Civilian logs then. I wasn’t taken in by family like you.”

Ylvante bent to a small bow and smiled at him.

“I am following your lead, Eshfyrr. This is your quest.”

“See you later up here”, Eshfyrr smirked and went back to the escalator.

Ylvante threw her and Wynthan one last glance, that almost felt threatening, before he followed. The soft glow of Wynthan’s tactical bracelet distracted Talindra and she turned to him, ignoring the knot building in her stomach.

“So, you father’s name?”

“Almyth Revran.”

“Interesting. I forgot your family name.”

“What is so interesting about it?”

“It used to be a horned one family name. I am curious how it made the jump over the fence, but it explains why your horned one blood is so strong. There must be more in you than you think.”

“Do you want to draw my family tree?”

She joked and went to the part of the archives that held the records of the last 50 years. The doors opened gently by themselves.

“What if I do?”

“You are welcome. I have no patience for the graphic part of such a search.”

With a few long steps he was right behind her and caught her mid step to hug her from behind with a low snicker.

“Lucky you, I find doodling calming.”

“Can I declare you my official family tree painter?”

Talindra craned her neck to somehow look at him but only got so far as to get their noses to touch.

“I am honored to do so.” 

Slowly Wynthan let go of her and looked around to see if he could find some paper and pens laying around.  

“What is your family name?”

The way he jumped told Talindra he was completely engulfed in his search.

“Dreywhin. Why are you asking?”

“Just curious”, she snickered and took his arm to pull him with her, “I am afraid you won’t find pen and paper. You need to note it in your bracelet for today.”

“I am afraid you are right.”

Again, Talindra stretched her fingers and bent her hands in all directions as if she was getting ready for hand-to-hand combat. Wynthan’s snicker behind her made her smile as she walked into the long hallway that held all record of the last 50 years. Her eyes scanned the first row and realized it was sorted in decades and then alphabetic.

“What a weird way to sort this?”, Wynthan commented behind her.

His habit to stand behind her since they arrived at the archives started to make Talindra question him.

“I know. Strangely it will make things easier for us now. We just need to find the entries with R over there and the next block. In one of them my father must appear.”

“Revran, you said?”

“Yes, Almyth Revran.”

Slowly his head came next to hers. His smile pressed against her cheek.

“I take the other block. This way we are faster.”

Fast like a snake her hand grabbed his head and accidentally brushed over the base of a horn. Wynthan breathed in sharp the same moment she turned in the small space to face him. When he opened the eyes again his gaze was clouded. Softly he licked his lips, breathing heavily.

“Sorry, I just wanted to stop you.”

Talindra crunched her face in shame and carefully watched his reaction. The deep growling snicker was nothing she expected, even less how he pressed her against the shelf and kissed her.

“Now you have your answer about the horns”, he whispered against her lips, breath hot on her face.

With a heavy gulp she nodded and snickered embarrassed. A mental note to not come close to his horns for the next weeks later, she rested her hands on his hips.

“Not the way I planned.”

A chuckle and a soft, shy kiss later Wynthan was gone. She swallowed the sigh and breathed in deeply to ignore the ideas in her head, that started to come to life. If she wanted to survive the next two and a half weeks she seriously needed to a grip of her imagination.

With a little delay she also started looking through the records. Since those before her were between 40 and 50 years old the chance was small she would find her father’s name in this block but since she didn’t know how old he was and if he was the older or younger brother, everything needed to be checked.

“Tal? I got him.”

“Wow, you are fast.”

“He is the first in the section with R over here”, Wynthan chuckled and waved with a folder.  

While he took a look Talindra came over.

“Stop right there. You mother’s must be there. Look at Endiphal, Yelori.”

Stumbling almost over her steps, she stopped and looked which letter was next to her. She realized she needed to take a few steps back to reach E and started searching. The sound of his steps and how he leaned against the shelves behind them told her he caught up already.  

Her eyes squinted against the strange, dimmed light Talindra finally found the folder she was looking for and pulled it out with a triumphant yell. Waving with it she tilted her head back to the entry area but stopped once they were there.

“A reading area is over there.”

Wynthan pointed to their left.

“You looked it up?”

“While you searched your mother’s file.”

The little proud smile was cute on him. He led the way to a small group of tables and armchairs. Both huffed surprised about the unexpected comfort. They took the first group and sat down. Questioning glances got exchanged.

“I don’t know if I am ready for this. I have my mother’s name now. This should help the elders to find relatives, right?”

Her arms rested in her lap as Talindra stared those two folders down. Wynthan wrapped an arm around her shoulder and gently rubbed her upper arm.

“I can copy the important data for you, and you take a look later, if you aren’t ready today.”  

Why she hesitated now, Talindra couldn’t name. She knew her father was dead; the question was about her mother’s whereabouts.

Long seconds later, she threw her hands in the air and grabbed her mother’s file. There was a picture of her attached to the first page.

“You look like her.”

His voice was low and soft. In some way it was comforting to see she took after her mother. Even Talindra could recognize the same eyes and facial structure she saw every day in the mirror. The only difference was her mother’s face was more oval with a more prominent cheek bone and the hair was darker and curly, where Talindra’s was wavy.

“Yeah, you can’t deny she is my mom.”

With a small, proud smile Talindra scanned over the information and closed the file with a sigh.

“This won’t help.”

“What is wrong?”

Gently, Wynthan pried the file from her hands and opened it again.

“Yelori Endiphal was declared missing in action on 14th Surin, 547 a.S. after her partner Almyth Revran was the only survivor of a six people strong team to eliminate a small group of four double A monster of the earth shaker category south of the Koleran chasm. Revran couldn’t tell where Endiphal went to but got rescued with two newborns he claimed to be their children. Endiphal’s motherhood couldn’t be confirmed since no medical record of her pregnancy exists. The children were named Talindra and Leenmera. First one got handed to Revran’s brother and his wife. The other child was brought to Hell to see who would care for her since family couldn’t be claimed.”

Wynthan read slowly aloud for which Talindra was thankful because after she saw the date of death she closed it and didn’t look further.

“What? I have a twin?”

“A sister. Leenmera is a woman’s name, and she had horns at birth”, he verified.

“She must be in training now, right? Only three years before she becomes a Sin Eater. Oh Eternals, please let her be less stubborn than me.”

A soft squeeze on her shoulder followed a gentle sigh.

“If she is only half as smart as you, she will know how to avoid the worst. Let’s see who took care of her since the authorities didn’t plan to hand her to your family.”

“Thanks.”

“You are welcome.”

She leaned into him for a moment and let her mind wander. Her mother was MIA and she had a sister. This was clearly nothing she expected. Suddenly she remembered how her uncle told her, her father died shortly after she was born and frowned. With a weird feeling she took her father’s file and opened it.

“This is weird…”

“What?”

Wynthan leaned over the file. Talindra pointed at the last paragraph and started reading.

“Alymth Revran got declared missing in action on 23rd Arestel 547 a.S. after he left his squad during a mission west of Fyllim mountains and was never seen again. Declared dead 27th Arestel 547a.S.”

“That is only three months after you were born”, Wynthan stated confused.

“And he was also MIA. No one really knows what happened to them. Do you think he tried to find her?”

Carefully, he took the file out of her hands and looked at her.

“I know I would if it were you.”

Talindra felt her cheeks going warm and giggled sheepish.

“We still have some get to know to do, you know.”

“I know, but from what those records say, he knew something he didn’t tell. Maybe both did. I know plenty of horned ones who went MIA in this area between the mountains and the chasm. Why, I don’t know, but maybe we will find out in the future, but I know I would never leave my partner out there alone, even less the mother of my children.”

His serious look, and even more serious tone sent shivers down her spine in all the good ways. Out of an impulse she interwove her free hand with his and nodded.

“There you are”, Eshfyrr’s voice sounded off from the main area.

Not knowing if she wanted to kill or hug him, Talindra slightly turned her head to him.

“You found your parents’ names?”

“Yeah”, Eshfyrr beamed excited, “I already know my father had no family that’s why I got put up for adoption. My mother’s name is Thesstasti Dreywhin. Now I try to figure out if she is still an active Sin Eater.”

Ylvante slowly approached them as well with a sour expression once he noticed how Talindra and Wynthan sat there but she couldn’t care less about him.

“Thesstasti Dreywhin?”, Wynthan repeated amused.

Now Talindra also made the connection and started to snicker.

“Yeah, you know her?”

“Oh, I do. She is my aunt.”

With a soft kiss on her temple Wynthan unfolded from her and got up to a seriously baffled Eshfyrr.

“What?”

“Ylvante knows my family name, he could have given you a pointer. So, we are cousins. Mom will laugh for days about this coincidence. Aunt Thess is still active. I think she has about ten more years as Sin Eater, but that means we can contact her now through the internal system.”

Eshfyrr fell in a free chair opposite of Talindra and stared at the ground.

“That wasn’t how I expected things to go.”

“Believe me, I know how you feel. I just learned I have a twin sister”, she stated dryly.

“Wow, that is tough.”

The second Wynthan stepped next to Eshfyrr, Talindra knew what was coming and bit her tongue. The surprised yell of Eshfyrr echoed from the walls when Wynthan surprise hugged him.

“My older brother is back from a mission and will be around for a while. He offered to help with training, so you got to meet more of the family.”

“You will like him. Less enthusiastic puppy than him”, Talindra teased with her thumb pointing at Wynthan, “And his partner reminds me of Kylantha a lot.”

“In this case, I assume we are done here?”, Ylvante stated questioningly towards Eshfyrr who was still in the middle to wrap his head around all of it.

The way how he tried to get away from them and indirectly ordered Eshfyrr to tag along didn’t sit well with Talindra. If it wasn’t for the things, she already heard from Wynthan to dislike Ylvante, the behavior he displayed now was enough.

“You can go if you like. I stay little longer. I guess Tal isn’t done yet?”

She shook her head with a sigh.

“I need to figure out who adopted my sister and if there is any family left on one side.”

The sour expression on Ylvante’s face grew stronger but he nodded.

“In this case, I head back and organize dinner. See you tonight, Eshfyrr.”

He slightly dropped his head in goodbye and turned to leave. All three watched him entering the elevator and the doors closing behind Ylvante. Talindra breathed out relieved.

“What the fuck was that?”

“That was civil for him”, Wynthan remarked.

“He got strange the moment I found my mother’s name but now I know why. He probably doesn’t like having a connection to you”, Eshfyrr stated matter of fact.

“I wouldn’t be surprised. I taught him his games can be played by two.”

Confused by his statement Talindra glanced at Wynthan, who chuckled deep.

“Don’t worry, I didn’t rat him out to the higher-ups, but I made sure the others in the barracks knew it was him who was the rat after I realized it was him.”

Surprisingly, Eshfyrr giggled slightly maliciously.

“He had it coming. But Tal needs help, right?”

“I can do it alone. I just need to find out who adopted my sister”, she pushed him down on a chair close by, “I guess you two have some stuff to talk about.”

“Are you sure?”, Wynthan asked worried.

“I am. Esh needs to be filled in and this place is safe.”

“We will be coming down with you. There is also a resting area.”

Before Talindra could reply Eshfyrr got up again and marched to the elevator. Wynthan shook his head amused at him and nudged her to move. A small smile on her lips she followed her friend who just became more of family than ever before.

[keef-a-corn]

Dat’s right, People, it’s time for ‘Keef watches TFP and you just get the notes!’

This is for season 1, episode 21: T.M.I.

Please reblog or comment on this with your thoughts! I really want to know what your opinion of the episode was!

I write down the timestamps, but I watch Transformers Prime on Stan (an Australian streaming service) so they may be slightly off.

ALSO! I try my best to note points for every character, but tend to get a little caught up by Bee (although I think I do a pretty good job with the notes regardless) so do be warned.

~~~~Transition~~~~

00:08 - would watching these sorts of shows be the equivalent to watching really gorey fight shows for the bots?

00:17 - ‘the baddest beast machines on the planet!’ Then the camera immediately pans to Ratchet

00:21 - I’ve never related to Ratcheg more than I do in this moment.

00:31 - so it is 0-0 (Ratchet looks so pretty I can’t rn)

01:15 - Why is this not brought up later? A missed opportunity really. Like imagine if during a mission the bots had come across a cave with scratches in it and a dead body, it being the effects of a different cylinder.

01:23 - she said the title!

01:53 - the delivery, the way he holds the mop, everything. That was flawless!

01:54 - he’s so smug, I love it. + A shot like this highlights just how large Ratchet is compared to Miko.

02:01 - how did Ratchet miss the sound of the broom hitting the floor?

02:03 - AND WASN’T THE GROUNBRIDGE CLOSED?!

02:06 - WHY DOESN’T MIKO EVER LEARN?!

02:10 - the way Knockout and Optimus are fighting makes it look like Optimus is Knockout’s trainer at a gym.

~intro~

03:12 - they didn’t need a shot of Bee fighting. But I’m glad it’s in there.

03:21 - Optimus just standing there to say that is unbelievably funny to me. + Arcee fighting Breakdown in the background and winning!

03:30 - so.. Optimus just stood there to say that, before proceeding to leave the artefact unguarded?

03:34 - I laughed a bit too hard just then

03:45 - Are they just taking up human phrases or?-

03:49 - I’m so confused XD

04:07 - that’s the way a dog reacts when you call for them and they didn’t notice you had left their side.

04:15 - I’m pretty sure Bee’s been fighting the same Vehicon this whole scene.

04:21 - the way her hair moves tho

04:22 - When did he get all the way over there?? AND WHY?? I seriously doubt that Bee would’ve found ramming into that Vehicon very effective.

04:26 - Couldn’t Ratchet just use Miko’s phone coordinates?

05:07 - he didn’t even try to move! Well.. maybe it was holding him there??

05:13 - the way his wheels slowly rotated.

05:19 - Damn.. I wish there was more of Knockout interacting with the autobots. Actually any decepticons interacting with the autobots.

05:21 - weird jump cut. Hehe What’s with the medics being so smug? I love it.

05:25 - they left the Vehicons behind.

05:32 - …what? Cleary the joke is that it wasn’t even remotely correct in phrasing but.. but why would ‘smart’ be involved in the sentence at all?

05:33 - Miko looking up at him in awe after the dumbest sentence ever.

05:35 - pretty background

05:43 - Ratchet doesn’t push Bulkhead at all, he just guides him back into a sitting position.

05:49 - Something to consider is how often Bulkhead resists proper medical treatment.

05:54 - Her interpretation is so unbelievably irrelevant in this situation.

06:02 - the broom is so small hehehe

06:07 - Bulkhead’s laugh

06:26 - hehe, short.

06:43 - h e y . Unnecessarily rude towards Breakdown.

06:46 - Breakdown appreciation moment.

07:14 - I want to know what Ratchet’s imagining rn.

07:34 - Why does Optimus’s have a battle mask on?

08:03 - the way they look at each other while theorising.

08:04 - A very peculiar way to say ‘would’ve shot up into space’ especially for a bunch or robots that don’t believe in heaven.

08:07 - EXTREMELY WEIRD WAY TO SAY HEAD. (+I cannot look away from Bee rn. What is he doing? Why is it so cute??)

08:19 - I refuse to believe that the cylinder lay on Earth completely undisturbed. 100% an animal would’ve gotten to it first.

08:28 - Yet she won’t learn.

08:31 - what did he say?? Is Arcee rephrasing the question? Why would she need to? I guess maybe he could’ve said ‘and the paintings?’ Because very few times do the beeps line up with what could’ve been said.

08:35 - when Ratchet says ‘anyone’ he looks at Optimus. It also just so happens that both are moving quite a bit.

08:42 - Optimus’s face-

08:43 - Bee just busting a move in excitement is so adorable and silly and AAAAA-

08:57 - Woa- Bulkhead is moving like a muppet. They’re all heavily animated (which makes sense considering that this is an exciting thing)

08:59 - Ratchet and his wandering eyes.

09:08 - just watch the whole scene again and watched the way everyone keeps moving.

09:32 - Concerned siblings

09:33 - ARCEE NO! Respond to him! WHAT DID HE SAAAY?!

10:03 - that’s sad

10:06 - Purging

10:12 - finishing each other’s sentences

10:20 - height difference

10:27 - heavy clipping on Arcee.

11:23 - I can’t believe he forgot his own work mother!

11:33 - how did she pick up on that so easily??

11:38 - He sounds like a parent rn..

11:55 - No, why is this so heavy?! TFP pulling at the heart strings rn.

12:20 - Something to recognise is that Optimus isn’t standing there, composed and stoic. He’s actively forcing himself to look that way for everyone’s sakes. There’s only so much a character can take before a stoic look becomes forced. I also could be looking too far into it, but where's the fun in that?

12:54 - A clever way to avoid answering without lying.

13:05 - she should’ve tried boyfriend- Does she just… have that photo open all the time?

13:34 - I THOUGHT SOMEONE HAD TO MANUALLY PULL THAT DOWN

13:42 - that paint’s gonna dry.

14:13 - missed opportunity to say ‘bring me the bull’s head.’

15:27 - someone thought ‘Knockout should do a flip’ and everyone else agreed. Makes the world a little bit better.

15:33 - Oooooh like ‘a little too much to drink’

15:43 - *throws to the Optimus fans* FEAST!

15:50 - …We all saw Bee do a one-handed cartwheel, right?

16:07 - Bulkhead isn’t there + they doubled up on some models + it’s very inconsistent with the order, number and types of cars there. It keeps changing.

16:45 - A nice detail is that Knockout uses the cares to help him get up.

17:57 - that’s so dark omgawd

19:18 - smart

20:01 - now if she were a real person, I would not being saying this because I’m not that evil… but yes. If she had stayed back like she was supposed to none of this would’ve happened.

20:05 - THE WAY OPTIMUS SAID MIKO! AA-

20:16 - Arcee’s gentle voice, Bee’s quick little nod.

20:20 - EVEN RATCHET. AHH. I know understand people that do bot x reader stories like this.

20:26 - as Miko gets an idea there’s a dong in the audio. It’s perfect.

20:46 - Bee is the only one that moves in this shot. Literally everyone else, including Miko, stays put.

20:58 - her hair acts like animal ears, goddamn.

21:04 - he’s alive!

21:06 - everyone leans in s l i g h t l y

21:18 - considering that she strummed it once, does that mean that Bulkhead and Miko ist listen to the same song on loop?

———————

So that was TMI

I didn’t expect to cry so much. I’ll tell ya that. It’s a good episode, but one I would skip during a more select viewing experience, but will sit through during a binge.

[stuckasmain]

Additional Moulin Rouge thoughts

I saw the tour production on the April 25th and the more time I have to settle the idea of it in my mind the more I can appreciate the musical for what it is. I did go on to watch the movie but that’s a future post. Here’s just a collection of my thoughts

While it’s also one of my big criticisms of the show, I can appreciate the first chunk of act one basically being four huge songs in a row (it only starts once Christian breaks away and starts narrating) your confused and brought up in this huge whirlwind of a moment- and it plays into the whole theme. At the same time it was confusing as shit going in with no context

During this big mix of numbers I want to thank whoever made the transition of Burning down the house/She’s a brick house. That’s hysterical and I love you.

✨Ohioooo yay✨

Whole scene mix up in the elephant where she thinks Christian’s the duke. I have no notes.

Also, possibly my favorite scene is them making up the show on the spot and the hilarity of that improv moment. It’s just too good

AND THE PLAY ALSO BEING DIRECTLY WHAT HAPPENS IN THE SHOW BUT WITH SMALL CHANGES. God this! I love this way way more than I should, it’s even better as I went in with no context but you could catch… ah that’s going to happen but when it - where in the rehearsals they’ve been playing the plays climax for laughs but when it becomes the actual climax? The absolute emotional gut punch of that gun scene? 🤌🏻 Art.

Zidler. I love this type of comedic role as the actor knows exactly what they’re doing and proceeds to steal every single scene they are in.

That being said I also like Zidler having more of a connection with his girls (and guys). It’s almost fatherly? In the actually caring for the well being/having a connection with them.!

Mustache twirling levels from the duke — also Rolling Stones number - hello???

MOTHERFUCKING ROXANNE. This number is - holy shit . Holy shit. Like for one thing it’s the perfect song choice and for another the absolute emotional powerhouse that John Cardoza is? He joined the tour mid march and he’s — oooohgh he’s great.

It’s funny in a dark sort of way but they have this crushing moment where he’s ugly sobbing, rocking the body of the woman he loved in his lap as everyone watches. Only to follow it up with 🎉 confetti cannon party time is Djsksksksksk see the movie does the opposite and it hits how it should but oh my god something about having confetti after is so funnny.

[bridgertonbabe]

Ranking the Rokesby Series

So after recently reading all 4 Rokesby books, here’s my ranking of them;

1. The Girl With The Make-Believe Husband

Cecilia and Edward’s love story has to be my favourite from the sheer drama of it all. This book has everything; the hero suffering from amnesia, the heroine pretending to be his wife, a brother MIA, falling in love over correspondence, a strawberry-induced allergic reaction, and the ever beloved “there’s only one bed” trope. I also think Cecilia and Edward’s book is my favourite of the Rokesby series because while reading it I felt as though it was a bit Benophie-coded, due in part to the heroine having to go by an alternate identity of sorts and the hero not being any the wiser right up until the last few chapters (though to be fair Edward is suffering from memory loss - Benedict is just an idiot lmao). 

2. The Other Miss Bridgerton

Andrew and Poppy are next and while I initially thought Billie was as chaotic a Bridgerton as her nieces and nephews, it turns out drama and scandal is simply a Bridgerton family trait, as proven by Poppy when she manages to get kidnapped by privateers. Andrew makes for the perfect charmingly cheeky hero and he definitely reminded me a lot of Colin especially with his inability to stay in one place for too long yet coming to a point where he desired more from life. I enjoyed the witty back and forth between the pair but also how closely they bonded through their deeper conversations and how their attraction became more and more palpable as the story progressed. I genuinely didn’t expect the drama that would ensue upon their arrival in Portugal but it made for a pleasant surprise and appropriately raised the stakes for them to realise just how much they meant to each other. 

3. Because Of Miss Bridgerton

Now while I did thoroughly love George and Billie’s love story they’ve ended up ranking third only because there was so much drama in the above books in stark contrast. Again, I can’t help but compare the Rokesby series with the Bridgerton series and in doing so it’s so abundantly clear that this story is Kanthony-coded; from the enemies-to-lovers trope between two respective eldest siblings, the alleged supposition among the other characters that Billie is destined to end up with one of George’s brothers (even though it’s quite obvious that the supporting players are all lowkey side-eyeing the pair throughout), and even a game of Pall Mall featuring the mallet of death. While it could be viewed as an italicized version of Kanthony; TVWLM is one of Julia Quinn’s best stories for a reason so fuck it, why shouldn’t it be echoed? 

4. First Comes Scandal

And just because Georgie and Nicholas’s story is ranked fourth doesn’t mean I didn’t enjoy it; again, purely based off of drama, this book simply wasn’t as wildly dramatic as it’s three predecessors. I loved the Muppet baby cameos of young ABC but if anything I loved it too much because I wanted more of them, plus I was a little disappointed that we never saw Edmund’s reaction to his best friend becoming engaged to his younger sister; did he get mad, was he shooketh, or did he find it a bit funny? For me the journey to Scotland dragged on a little more than I would have liked though I did enjoy reading how Georgie and Nicholas slowly fell for each other and transitioned from being friends to lovers (plus it was a nice touch having their first time being both of their first times; it gave their love scene a fresh dynamic from the rest of Regency couples’ first times).  

[likeabxrdinflight]

anyway...now I want to talk more about why I did care about this show. because honestly? I was never in it for the queer rep, though that was nice, or lumity.

I was in this show because I have a real life Eda. well...sort of.

the real world is a little more complicated than a children's cartoon. but nevertheless...I want to talk a little about the Eda to my Luz. for privacy purposes, I'll call her...Mrs. B. honestly I refer to her by her first name now but we'll go with this.

Mrs. B was a teacher of mine. I don't want to get into everything that was going on for me at the time I first met her, but long story short, catholic school sucks when you're gay and don't know it yet but members of the faculty have started to suspect and are subtly trying to steer you in a...straighter direction behind your back.

but Mrs. B wasn't doing any of that. quite the opposite. she, rather like Eda, had a few rough edges, a few less than pleasant traits about her. I didn't even like her at first- I thought she was kind of mean and more than a little intimidating. but Mrs. B, who taught 8th grade mostly, was...a little different from most of the teachers I'd had up to that point.

for starters, everything about her was dark. dark hair, dark eyes, black clothes, short temper, dark sense of humor. it was a legitimate rumor among the younger grades that she was actually a witch. and Mrs. B did nothing to discourage this. she thought it was funny.

it was kind of obvious that she didn't really fit in well with the other faculty. she never seemed to try that hard, either. she didn't conform her teaching style very much (this was all before NCLB had fully gotten to the private school systems tho). she taught english a little more in depth, she taught critical thinking in ways no one ever had before- I distinctly recall an assignment she set that forced us to write a convincing argument both for and against abortion debate, for example. and good lord the way that woman taught religion was...honestly I'm shocked she was never fired for it. she skated a very thin line with that.

she taught us other cultural myths. she told us the entire book of genesis was probably made up, couching it only with "but spiritual truths probably". she told us most of were going to have sex before marriage, don't worry about it, use condoms. don't do drugs but if you do and get in trouble, call me. the church says homosexuality is a sin but a lot of people don't believe that so eh...

It was as close to open allyship as she was able to get. but it was felt.

she showed a softer side in other places too. she encouraged me to try out for the school play (which she always directed) even though I was shy and quiet. when there were two new students in our grade she rather deftly directed people she thought would be good friends for them to do just that. and it worked on both counts. she sent the one half-mexican student we had in our class down to the office to run a quick errand and then absolutely lost her shit on the boys who had been making racist mexican jokes.

she did her best to look out for me behind the scenes when other members of the staff had a target on my back for maybe being gay. it wasn't quite enough- the harm was still done- but she tried. she fell short sometimes, there are things I wish she'd done differently, things I wish she'd said more openly. but she always had a hand held out if I ever needed it.

I had a sense that she was a little bit weird, like me and my friends were a little bit weird. it turned out, she was kind of weird. a little off the beaten path, a little bit different. I later learned, as an adult, that not only does she not even believe in catholicism, she's a closet agnostic. and as a child, once I saw past the tough outer shell, I saw somebody I felt like I could trust. and when shit hit the fan for me, she was the one I ended up reaching out to for help.

I went to public high school, and the transition was rough after over a decade at the same old catholic school. this on top of a lot of unresolved religious trauma nonsense, don't wanna get into it, I ended up in a bit of a mental health crisis that I also don't want to get into the details of. long story short, I reached a bit of a breaking point, I had exhausted other resources, so I sent Mrs. B an email. long, desperate, frankly embarrassing to think back on. but she responded, she agreed to talk to me.

and it helped. it didn't fix anything per se, but it helped. I went back to the school to visit her fairly often throughout that year, leaning on her for support in ways that can't have been easy for her, but made a world of difference for me. I don't know what would have happened if I hadn't reached out like that, I'm not sure how much worse things would have gotten. but I remember...I was fifteen and felt like I was walking towards the edge of a cliff. I hadn't gotten to the edge yet, but she pulled me off that path entirely. she didn't save my life so much as ensure no one would ever have to.

we've been...something like friends ever since. It's not as easy as the relationship between Eda and Luz. It was complicated by the boundaries that once existed, especially when I was a minor. she was always very careful about that. I think she still is on some level.

but she is kind of a mother figure to me, a bit complicated by the fact that she was once my teacher, that I definitely had a bit of a hero-worship crush on her at one point when I was younger, but I think that's where it's settled now. that's how I've come to see her.

I don't think she entirely reciprocates the feeling. I've never asked, and I've never told her this. I see her as a mother figure, but I don't think that's mutual- I think she sees me as a former student, a kid she cared about, and now something of a friend. she values my presence in her life, she's said as much, but there's also a lack of reciprocity in the dynamic. we don't totally act like friends, we act like a former teacher and her former student. she's private, keeps herself to herself. she knows way more about me than I do about her. I don't ever expect her to lean on me for support the way you might in a more mutual friendship. I don't think she'd feel right about that, even now.

the dynamic now is such that I reach out whenever I'm in town, we meet up, have lunch or coffee or something for a couple hours, bye see you next time. we don't really talk in between. I wish we did sometimes, but we don't. that's not something I really feel at liberty to do, not for lack of invitation, but I'm still mindful of boundaries (and also she's 70 and can't text for shit lol). she doesn't really ever reach out first, either. those old boundaries will always exist, even when she says they're not there anymore. I know they still are on some level, they always will be. having anxiety doesn't help things either.

but at the end of the day, this woman has always been in my corner, has always been a supportive mentor to me when I needed her to be. every time I have come to her for help she has been there. every time I have needed something from her she has followed through. when I needed someone to talk to after my best friend was assaulted, she was there to listen. when I stopped by the school in the months following both of my grandmothers' deaths, she pulled up a chair and let me talk. when I needed a little self esteem boost during a rough time in my master's program, she was there with words of encouragement and her usual dry humor. when I finally plucked up the courage to come out to her, she responded perfectly. when I asked her what was really going on all those years ago at that school, she told me the truth, even when she knew it would be hard for me to hear.

and it was. it was hard to hear. but it's also set me on the path to finally healing some old shit in a way that will actually matter. she's still pulling me back from the wrong paths, and I'm not entirely sure she knows just how much. she isn't doing all the work, far from it, but her impact on my life really cannot be overstated.

and this is the relationship that Eda and Luz almost immediately reminded me of. that was why the owl house touched me as much as it did. I see shades of the girl I used to be in Luz, and I see an awful lot of Mrs. B in Eda. even if it's not exactly the same, even if I wish Mrs. B and I were a little closer than we really are...and that hurts sometimes. but I'm a therapist now, I understand why those dynamics can never really step beyond what they were. a client is never not a client. a student is never not a student.

but it's close enough. and the owl house comes close enough to representing it, closer than anything I've ever seen before, frankly. mentor figures in fantasy stories usually fit into very specific molds and tropes- the gandalfs, the dumbledores- I had never seen anything that told a story that I felt was more true to life. at least, more true to my life.

more than any queer representation, more than lumity, this is what makes the owl house special to me. and I'm very glad I got to experience it.

[wawamouse]

Oz Rewatch 3: S4E01: A Cock and Balls Story

Plotlines

Lockdown is ended after 14 days with Glynn warning the white and black inmates to watch their behavior

With Hamid gone, Zahir Arif becomes leaders of the Muslim faction

Sister Pete suggests therapy for Cyril O’Reily and the Prestons, but Gloria refuses

McCullum commits suicide and as a result the inmates in Ad Seg are taken out for walks where Miguel and Bevilaqua are stabbed by Giles

Beecher wants to apologize to Schillinger, asks his dad to help location Hank Schillinger, much to Keller’s annoyance; they fight

Shirley Bellinger returns to Oz after miscarrying; Moses Deyell joins the cast

Devlin re-election coming up; Glynn is on the short list of lieutenant gov

CO Andrea introduced; McManus wants to propose to Diane; turns out she got engaged to a Buckingham Palace guard

Kenny is impatient about Adebisi’s plan; Wangler, Poet, and Junior are transferred back to Em City

Tarrant, Mobay, and Galino are introduced

Mobay/Basil begins his undercover assignment, buying drugs off Kenny

Stanislofsky tricks Galino into giving him his cellphone

Kenny & co bully Tarrant; O’reify tells Tarrant to stand up for himself; Tarrant gets Adebisi’s gun and kills Kenny and Pierce

See, Cloutier’s astral projecting later on wasn’t for no reason. The presence of ghosts in the show is already established early on!!

Sister: They didn’t check on him for a week?

The black guy with glasses is an extra in Oz (like, the prison) later on in this season. I always thought it was funny that he showed up in Bevilaqua's crime flashback.

Sister: He’s like a cat…

Sister: That’s what I said!

Me: The rare interaction between Mukada and Beecher… Sister: And the shipping is going crazy. Me: Honestly? I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone float that pairing before. Beecher usually interacts with Sister Pete, I guess.

Rebadow seeing Keller grope Beecher

Sister: You wanna hold someone’s junk bacteria gun? Disgusting.

Sister: Lies!

They used the whole transition pack on this scene

Sister: …So he gave him the gun to get him to get rid of the three black guys… so McManus will get replaced…

Sister: (cackling) Why was he still just casually walking after hearing all those gunshots??

Stray thoughts:

Everyone came back after lock down with a haircut lol

Me and Sister cackled pretty much throughout the whole scene where Diane was revealed to have married a palace guard; Sister: He’s like “oh how could she do this to me?” Like dude, how could she NOT do it to you?

Sister recognised the actor who plays Beecher’s dad

I just think it's funny the Latinos congregate in a corner directly behind a security camera

Final Thoughts:

Sister: I wish the french guy had stuck around for longer but it was apparent that they weren’t going to put him in a gang, so it’s not like he would have had much else to do if he stuck around.

Sister remained baffled at how negligent Howell had to have been to not notice McCullum chewing himself to death for a week

I found Ryan's manipulation of Tarrant an interesting parallel to how he sort of buddies up to but also manipulates Beecher in S1. If Tarrant had stuck around for longer, do you think he would've had a Beecher like progression? Or was he too soft from the get-go?

[biracy]

Okay I've had like over a week to sit with all my brba thoughts and reminisce about the show w my family and everything. I have decided to make a Critique (there was a scene I didn't like and I decided I'm so important I should make a whole post about it). Spoilers for, like, season 3ish under the cut

Okay I kind of hate the speech Jesse has about Hank in the hospital LMAO I'm sorryyyy. I definitely think Jesse should be ANGRY, not only did he get the shit beat out of him but he took the fall for something Walt did without Walt doing anything to really stop it from happening, but the whole speech feels waaay too... "poetic", I guess? for the character he is at that point in the show (tbh he never really reaches a point where that all feels like something he would say, imo). I think his first big "fuck-you-Walt" speech in the same scene is really great, as all fuck-you-Walt speeches are, but him talking about being a ghost haunting Hank for the rest of his life or whatever just doesn't really feel like him to me. Feels more like a Walt thing to say if anything LMAO (like when Walt gives that speech in the finale to Gretchen and Elliot, he's the kind of freak who SELLS that speech. You KNOW he rehearsed that shit in the car). It's also a scene made weirder and more out-of-place by it being preeetty quickly followed up with the montage of Jesse goofing off in Gus's lab after he gets out of the hospital, and the two scenes just don't really feel like the same character to me. Balancing the serious and funny aspects of Jesse's character is usually something the show is really, REALLY good at, but idk it feels like they went too hard in both directions in this one specific instance. If the being-a-ghost-in-Hank's-head speech feels like a Walt speech and not a Jesse speech, the dicking-off-in-the-lab montage feels like a Badger and Skinny Pete montage, not a Jesse montage (if anything, it's something he'd do when they're there with him, not by himself. Even since the beginning he was kind of a "voice of reason" in their friend group. He knows how to spell "street" correctly.). I get that Jesse's in kind of a transitional stage in this point of the show, both like literally within the fiction and in a sort of metatextual way as he shifts from season 1-2 Jesse to season 4-5 Jesse (with rehab being the big shifting point), but in retrospect it kinda just feels like "Jesse is emotional and gritty!" late-seasons writing and "Jesse is silly and stupid!" early-seasons writing turned up to their extremes and juxtaposed too closely with each other for it to really work for me. Idk if people, like, love this scene or something, apologies if you do, but that's my thought.

[nellie-elizabeth]

What We Do in the Shadows: Local News (5x05)

Okay, this was pretty hilarious.

Cons:

The thing about Guillermo's slow vampire transition this season is that it does blunt some of the comedy impact of him being a vampire in the first place. I sort of wish there had been a more dramatic contrast between human Guillermo and vampire Guillermo. It's almost like instead of setup and punchline, it's setup and then very long, meandering journey towards a destination we've already been told about. That's not to say I don't enjoy some of the things about said journey, but I don't know. I guess I'm just hoping we'll see Guillermo get his transformative moment to shine.

Oh, and, same note as always on the Guide: there's nothing wrong with her, but she seems like she could lift right out of the story without being missed at all. Sorry!

Pros:

I did like Guillermo's scenes overall, I love the solemnity mixed with irritation mixed with comedy, as Guillermo wants to say a goodbye to his mother since once he's fully a vampire, their connection is no longer safe. And yet family squabbles, and distracting news broadcasts showing Nandor and the others getting into all sorts of trouble, mean that Guillermo can't have the solemn moment he wants with his mother. When he finally does get it, her first question is if the change happening in his life is making him happy. She reminds him that it's normal to feel some doubt during a big transition.

It was such a sweet moment from her perspective, having no idea what's really going on. And it was so fraught from Guillermo's, as his mother literally burns his skin by putting a cross on him, replacing the one that she believes he has "lost".

And then back at home, the plot with the vampires is pure chaotic comedy gold. Nandor is on the local news, talking about a water main breakage on the street. He accidentally makes comments about how they've been living there for centuries, which means: oh no! The secret is out. Everybody knows about vampires now. They all decide the only thing to do is to make a stand and fight. They also think if they can get back in front of the cameras, they can hypnotize mention of the truth away from all the viewers.

It all devolves into utter chaos from there, with the vampires setting up booby traps, making plans to flee, to kidnap, to murder... eventually ending up on the local news to try and thwart mention of their vampiric abilities. They hypnotize everyone to make them forget, but then basically have to act out being the news anchors so as not to confuse any humans watching. All rendered especially comedic when you realize that the human newscaster hadn't thought anything at all of Nandor's original comments.

There were too many funny moments to mention in this whole thing, but to pull just a few of my favorites, I loved "Nandor the Relentless" being misheard as "Nandor De Laurentis". I loved Colin immediately going berserker and tearing the house up to prepare for battle. I loved Lazlo being indignant that Guillermo "hung up on him" when in fact Colin had cut the phone line, and I loved the comedy of Nandor and Lazlo discussing how big a bag was needed for their kidnap/murder victim while Guillermo tries to dissuade them over the phone.

I'm also liking the continued trend this season of Nandor really missing Guillermo, noticing he's not around as much, and feeling resentful and sad about it. When Guillermo finally does show up to help, Nandor basically says they don't need him, and Guillermo, in a fit of pique, does in fact refuse to help. They get out of their messy chaos on their own. It's interesting that Nandor knows that something's up; I wonder what the reaction will be when he finds out what it is! I'm so excited to see.

So there you have it. This wasn't one of my all-time favorite episodes but I did think the hilarity and chaos got delightfully insane!

8/10

[lauriab]

Alright guys I’ve decided to split up my "review" of phantom italy into many posts because god knows I don’t have the patience to make one well thought out post. Also I use the term review loosely. I’ll be listing random remarks, not making a structured text, I m on vacation dammit hehe.

AUCTION/OVERTURE

Not much to say about the auction, the chandelier was quite nice but for me the real showstopper is the transition that takes place during the overture.

Since this is a smaller production the chandelier doesn’t get lifted above the audience, instead it simply ascends to the ceiling of the stage.

However they absolutely make up for it by taking advantage of the turning stage to offer a very cinematic looking transition where you get introduced to different characters while the overture plays.

I’m sure I’m forgetting someone but the managers, Joseph Buquet, Mme Giry and others all get a turn to walk on stage in slo-motion as if going about their daily life at the opera.

I actually found this much more entertaining than the usual simple « chandelier lifting » transition

HANNIBAL/THINK OF ME

I loved Carlotta in this production. She definitely stood out in comparison to other Carlotta’s I’ve seen.

Instead of simply being a whiny Diva you really get the feeling that this Carlotta cares about her position. Her theatrics simply seem like a conscious act to make people do what she wants.

However I will point out that she sometimes didn’t pronounce her lines very clearly, which is obviously not an issue if you are a phan who has memorized every word but I can imagine a first time audience member might have a hard time understanding certain things.

Earl was amazing as Andre but you guys already knew that hehe.

I’ve already seen someone talk about this but I did love the costuming for the rehearsal. Half of the actors had accessories thrown on over their normal suits which is definitely what most rehearsals usually look like in real life. The theatre kid inside of me relates hard.

Loved Amelia as Christine. They used the turning stage during think of me which I once again found to be a good way to add visual interest to a usually pretty basic scene.

MIRROR SCENE

🩷M e g💜G i r y💙

I was a very happy little bi.

Meg was absolutely in love with Christine and that is so valid for her. I think she might have been more obsessed with Christine than both Raoul and Erik combined.

We’re talking hand holding, never ending eye contact, hugs, also this meg is SO annoyed that her mom makes her go rehearse, all she wants to do is stare at Christine for 5 more minutes mom plsssss

*coughcough* anyway, back to the canonical romance.

I would love to be able to describe Christine’s reaction when Erik’s « INSOLENT BOY—» blasts in but I think I was too busy literally melting at the sound of Ramin’s voice to pay attention sorry.

Because of the limited sets the mirror Erik appears through is actually the one of top of Christine’s vanity.

It is a little funny to see Christine lift her skirts to scale her vanity but I actually quite liked the effect it gave overall. The elevated mirror not only gave Erik a little more height which looks very ethereal and intimidating but it also made it look like he was a sort of portrait coming to life and breaking out of painting into reality… I’m not great at explaining these things but just trust me it looked very gothic and cool hehe.

Just noticed I didn’t talk about Raoul at all… Raoul existed, the end. (The actor was actually really good, I’m not at all trying to throw shade at the him I just could not care less about Raoul if my life depended on it.)

AAA I’ll continue this soon hopefully, I have tons more to say about the rest of the show :DDD

[whatyourusherthinks]

Drive-Away Dolls Review

So it's been a shit month for movies, hasn't it been. Not a rhetorical question, it has. The only good thing I've seen this month that wasn't a rerelease was Lisa Frankenstein, and no one else saw it. I was holding out hope for Drive-Away Dolls, since not only is the director and the writer the producers, but the director is one of the Coen Brothers. Yeah, I guess they split up? I didn't know that. But please, please be good. Especially since I just saw Land of Bad.

Side note, I choose the poster for the front of the review based on the poster I see when we do our marketing at work, which is why I'm using the one above. But occasionally we use a different one for the marquees, and I sort of love this one more.

I dunno. Looks cool.

What's The Movie About?

Two lesbians are travelling to Florida and accidently pick up a brief case some gangsters want, so the gangsters chase them down.

What I Like.

I really liked the gangster characters. The two who were chasing the girls had a really good chemistry, and I especially liked their dynamic. There was a lot of talk about enjoying life and social dynamic that I thought was really interesting, and also creates a great parallel between the leads and the gangsters following them. The ending is also spectacularly hilarious. Matt Damon isn't in much of the movie, but holy hell is his part goddamn funny.

What I Didn't Like.

The first three-fourths of the movie is, well, a little hard to watch. There's a lot of non-sequiturs that eventually get explained, but I honestly felt like they didn't really need to be in the movie at all. The transitions between scenes were jarring even if they weren't random psychedelia. I'm getting really suspicious of the prevalence of lesbians in movies now a days. It feels real exploitative sitting through the front half of this movie, although by the end I realized the sleezy nature of all the sex in the first half was intentional so I guess this movie gets a pass. I feel bad complaining about it since this is basically what I and other queer people seeking representation want, a lot of stories about us. But it is making me question why the only gay man I've seen in a movie recently was from that fuckin' Mean Girls reboot. Speaking of using in' instead of ing, clearly neither the writer nor the actress playing the white lead is from Texas, because that character's mannerisms are so chicken-fried it was honestly distracting. And I don't know whether Pedro Pascal's part in the movie was a brilliant joke or just a waste.

Final Summation.

Alright, I need to word this carefully. Sitting through Drive Away Dolls is like listening to someone tell a long joke. The beginning is some what difficult to sit through and has some stuff that doesn't make sense, but once the punchline hits everything comes together. The real question I had to ask myself after watching this movie was, "Is the joke funny?". Yeah, I'd say so. I would recommend going out and seeing this movie.