#and it almost always leads to falling into the alt-right

[piplupod]

Really sucks to see someone who was clever and kind as a teen turn to "divine feminine" and "law of attraction" and at first she insisted she was trans-inclusive but she's reblogging from open radfems now and I'm just... tired. I'm very tired. It is so exhausting and crushing to see a very clever kind person fall down that rabbit hole turned pipeline.

anyways y'all please stay away from new age spiritual shit. use your critical thinking please. spirituality and religion are good things, but the new age movement is not. I hate seeing people I've known for years fall into it and I can't bring them out of it because they get so strangely brainwashed by it :')

[angllicjk]

𝐈’𝐌 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐍𝐞𝐞𝐝 (𝐌)

𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Alt Nextdoor Neighbor!Jungkook X Bartender!(fem)Reader

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 9.4K

𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: While you're too busy putting up with that asshole boyfriend of yours, Jungkook spends his time trying to get you to see that he could be a better man for you. You're all he wants and he knows you want him just as much, you just need a little push. Specifically a night in with him and perhaps spill all he feels to you even if it might lead to you both falling apart.

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬/𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: pining(jk), friends to lovers!, sum angst, tiny fluff, sorta unrequited feelings but not rlly, oc is emotionally constipated & very conflicted, jk is a desperate feral simp for oc, jk with neck tatts & of course his sleeve tatt😩, jk wearing smudge eyeliner(soooo hot), jk with brow & lip piercing, jealousy, slight possessive jk!, mentions of toxic relationship, smoking pot(jk & oc), infidelity(oc), arguing, sexual tension, heavy petting, heated making out, sexual intercourse, unprotected sex, big dick!jk, softdom!jk, sub!oc, rough vaginal fingering, oral(f receiving very briefly), cum eating/tasting, squirting, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, size kink/difference, light dirty talk, missionary, biting/marking & light choking.

A/N: Hiii!. I’m back with another fic 🫶🏻 this took kinda long to finish & for what, I was kinda iffy about it but I rlly wanted to post another story again. I rlly hope you enjoy this, pls let me know. I shall post another one soon hopefully. I love youuu allll💗💕🩷🎀

Through the thick haze that lingers over the both of you in his bedroom, Jungkook still can’t wrap his mind around the fact that you’re real and sitting right next to him. A cloudy puff of smoke escapes your red stained lips, licking them right after and when you turn to look at him with a blissful smile. He couldn’t think of a better sight. A better moment than this, because he likes the way you look beside him in his room, on his bed, when you look at him like that. Just you.

Jungkook’s been trying to get you to come over to his place for a while now. Seeing you in the halls in passing or down at the laundromat and sometimes in the elevator isn’t enough for him. Being next door to you simply isn’t enough. The amount of times he’s knocked on your door to borrow some fucking sugar or to ask if you need your sink fixed again. Hell, he’s gone as far as pretending his shower was broken just so he could use yours in the meantime. Anything in the book just to get closer to you really.

Like almost every night when he’s waiting up for you after your shift from the bar a little ways from the complex just so he could walk you home. Asking about your night and keeping you company down the sketchy dark streets because he doesn’t like the thought of you all alone out there.

You always remind him that he doesn’t have to do that but Jungkook insists he must and walks you home every night anyway. He likes to. Especially if it means he gets to spend more time with you while keeping you safe.

“I just needa make sure my pretty neighbor gets inside safely, can’t have anything happen to her.”

An addictive sensual melody of a song plays low from his stereo system, filling the lingering silence between you in Jungkook’s bedroom and the heady bliss you’re starting to feel puts your overworked mind at ease.

You said you wanted to forget about whatever happened in your walls earlier(all he heard was some heated argument between you and your bitch ass boyfriend) and for once not feel a single thing but that of the burning relaxation between your fingers. Which is why you’re currently sitting beside him on his comfy bed smoking some of the pot he deals. And yet, here he is making you feel a million other things instead. Jungkook is not even doing anything but merely existing.

The way he looks so pretty leaning back against his deep burgundy colored wall. It’s cute how long strands of hair nearly cover his dark eye-lined eyes, although you miss the sight of his hot brow piercing. He had you melting on sight when he walked you home not even an hour ago when you first saw him. The fit of a signature leather jacket, an old band tee that fits his slim frame perfectly and baggy denim jeans with a metal square studded belt gleaming around his hips. Veiny wrists clad in thick leather bands, some silver studded and spiked as well. Long slender fingers adorning pretty silver jewelry.

Jungkook always looks so good.

Damn him for being so fucking hot.

“Got anything on your mind?. Wanna share?.” He breaks the silence, staring back at you whilst taking a long drag from the thick blunt held within two digits. His leather jacket had been shrugged off the moment you both entered his room and now you’ve got the pleasure of staring at his beautiful tattooed arm and a few that litter the right side of his neck.

It’s a moment before you answer, eyes trailing up to his pretty irises that stare back at you, glazed over with a look you can’t quite pinpoint this instant, but it makes your insides feel on fire. If he knew what you were currently thinking about, you wonder what he’d say or do. The guy is almost always running through your mind, as much as you don’t want to admit it.

“I don’t think so.”

He hears you utter softly, tearing your gaze away to place your attention upon the many posters he’s got plastered over his wall instead. You can’t handle the way he’s looking at you anymore. Jungkook just loves eye contact.

“Why not?.” He sighs in disbelief, neglecting his half smoked blunt on the ashtray near him on his desk. It’s been silent for a bit between you, only his music makes it less awkward but it’s not uncomfortable. Jungkook had been wanting to say something to keep you interested, to get even closer to you. Although, he’s not sure if you’d wanna come back again after tonight, but he can’t help but think that you look like you belong here right beside him.

A breathy chuckle tumbles out of you along with smoke. You roll your eyes and shake your head.

“Because it’s simply not something I want you to know.”

Now Jungkook really wants to know what's going on inside that mind of yours. He’s got a few guesses, but he’s not so sure you’d like to hear them.

A sudden thought ponders in his mind and with a quirk of a brow he scoots a bit closer as he then suggests,

“Well, what if I tell you something in return?.”

The idea momentarily intrigues you, lifting your head to meet his excitement filled orbs. He almost looks innocent for a change.

“Mm, like what?.” You ask before inhaling another huff of the now shortened blunt.

Jungkook gets a bit distracted watching you and the way you blow out the smoke from your lips. Why do you make smoking look so hot?.

Another thing he finds himself distracted by is the peek of cleavage he sees by the first few buttons undone of your white blouse mandatory for your bartending gig. His throat constricts at the sight, arousal burning in his gut and Jungkook forces his eyes back up, delaying in his response to you.

“It can be anything.”

“Fine, tell me a secret.” You comply without much thought, not really minding the idea at all. It should be fun and simple, something else to keep the thoughts at bay.

Jungkook likes the sound of that, so he leans close and whispers in your ear. The deepness of his low timbre and lips slightly grazing the shell of your ear, it all sends a good tingle down your spine you try to fight off. You don’t want him to know the effect he has on you.

“I heard you the other night through the wall and I fucked my fist hard imagining it was you instead. Came so damn hard hearing the hot sounds you made.”

The filth he just confessed widens your eyes in slight surprise. Did he just say that?. The fact that Jungkook got off to the sound of you trying to make yourself cum after hours in bed and admitted it was so hot.

The walls are thin and you’ve found his bed is adjacent to yours with the same layout as your own apartment. So it’s no wonder he could hear you. Sometimes you hear him as well.

You very much heard him that night too and his desperate sexy moans through the walls fueled your own drive to your end with your hot neighbor in mind. So much for keeping the thoughts at bay, because now they stray further imagining what he might look like himself laying in bed chasing his own end. Most likely shirtless, boxers pulled halfway down with a tight fist wrapped around his hard cock, head thrown back, sweaty chest heaving, mouth wide open and groa— Okay! That’s enough!. You force the sinful thoughts to go away at once. It’s definitely not something you want to think about right now with him right beside you. It’s not so good for your foggy mind and the ache between your legs.

Jungkook leans back a bit, taking in the expression on your face with a teasing grin. He knows he’s got you all hot and bothered. You can try to hide it all you want, but he knows. Jungkook always knows.

“Your turn.” The whisper he rasps deeply in your ear fuels simmering heat in the pit of your tummy. It’s crazy how just hearing his voice is enough to make you feel all hot.

‘Come on Y/N. Keep it together’.

When you turn to look at him once again with those pretty eyes, all Jungkook wants is to simply tug you to him impossibly closer and kiss the fuck out of you. To taste those sweet lips he’s always dreaming about.

“I like that you walk me home every night, it’s sweet of you.” He barely hears your low voice, but you say it so lovely with a tiny smile peering up at him, giving him a glimpse of your pretty teeth.

How are you so fucking cute right now?. Especially after what he just confessed to you.

“I like you so much.” Jungkook doesn’t hesitate to confess, passion dripping off his tongue. It tugs your heartstrings, but you pretend you didn’t hear it.

“That time you took a shower in my bathroom when you forgot a towel and I brought you one. Well, after you left I went to my room and touched myself because I thought you looked so hot half naked and with dripping wet hair.” It almost took a lot for you to admit that, but it just came out. A sheepish smile spreads across your face with slight embarrassment. You bring the blunt up to your lips for another much needed drag.

Since he shared a dirty secret, why not share one too. It’s only fair.

“Fuck, your so hot.” Jungkook groans at the thought, shutting his eyes for a moment as he tugs his bottom lip between his teeth imagining you in bed desperately trying to get yourself off to the thought of him.

“I want you to come over more.” He then says, a bit eagerly turning back to you.

“I like the little talks we have and when you're kind enough to ask if I need help with anything.” You add on, gaze softening as you remember those times Jungkook was able to make you forget what a hard night you had with stories of his own that got a few laughs out of you or even asking about the things no one ever takes the time to learn about you, especially when he never does.

It’s what you really appreciate and a part of you hopes that you never lose the safe space that you feel with Jungkook, whenever you’re near him. He’s a comforting warmth, a home you terribly miss sometimes and he makes it all feel even a little better most times.

“You’re such a sweetheart and I hate when that motherfucker comes around when he treats you like shit.”

And suddenly it changes in a millisecond. You still briefly, body growing tense beside him and he notices the change as well when the smile slips off your face, knowing he hit a nerve he shouldn’t have.

“You didn’t have to say that.” Low and soft you utter tinged with sadness and he feels the disappointment in your words. In the way you look at him. Your hurt filled eyes tell him so. Striking a pang in his heart, but he can’t bear this any longer. Everything he feels on the inside. Himself. For you. About you. It’s always you.

“But it’s true. Why do you let it happen when…when you have me.” Jungkook sighs with the utmost pented frustration. He doesn’t get why you let yourself get treated so badly. That the lousy fucker is taking advantage of you and messing with your beautiful head. It’s sickening. His heart hurts knowing it and the fact that he can’t necessarily do anything about it. At least not without hurting you in the process by butting into your toxic relationship. You’d probably stop speaking to him if he tried to as well, something he certainly cannot risk. But here he is doing just that. Jungkook can’t let it happen anymore.

“It’s…it’s just complicated.”

It’s all you could ever say, he’s heard it all before. It’s always so fucking complicated and it seems like it’s never going to get uncomplicated any time soon either. Deep down you know this, but you’re too stubborn to still try to make it work.

“It wouldn’t be with me.” He clasps his hand over yours that’s resting upon your naked thigh, gently squeezing your plush skin in a comforting manner. It startles you, makes you feel those things all over again. Everything he’s saying is getting to your head and taking over your body. Maybe it’s the weed. It’s definitely the weed.

“What are you doing?.” With furrowed brows in confusion, you pull your hand away from under his searing touch and scoot further to create some type of distance. He’s too close for comfort, for the addictive feeling he provides that’s all too consuming.

You’re slipping away from him, putting up those walls he’s been trying to tear down for months now. He won’t let you, not this time.

“I just wanna show you how sweet I could be to you.” Jungkook never tears his gaze away, eyes holding so much emotion that you almost can’t hold it together yourself and it’s enough to crack some of the hard shelled resolve you’ve tried scraping together in a desperate attempt to stay put, never stray.

“You are sweet Jungkook, so sweet I-…I don’t know what to do with myself sometimes.” You sighed out almost defeatedly as you slump your head against his wall, staring up at the ceiling.

He’s the sweetest and everything opposite from the man you’ve been seeing. Jungkook cares about you so much, you can tell by the way he’s always looking out for you. The things he says, the things he does for you even when you don’t ask for it. The efforts he makes in getting to know the real you and when he gives you the heart-melting look that makes you want to unleash the deepest parts of you that you never share with anyone else. To let him have his way. Let him have you.

“I want you, you already know this.” Jungkook’s husky whisper brings you back to him and the comforting yet suffocating confines of his bedroom.

He wants to so badly reach out and hold your hand. Have you look at him again and make you hear his heart out till it’s full content, till you know everything he hopes, dreams and desires for.

“You don’t need that stupid pretty boy, I bet he doesn’t know how to take care of you since I keep hearing you night after night.” Jungkook shakes his head, gently leaning closer to have you near him again. Within his four walls, inches, millimeters. It’s never enough for Jungkook and it never will be. If he could sear himself into your skin, meld himself forever to your body, he would if it meant never parting from you. If it meant you’d belong to him and he belonged to you.

Wouldn’t you want that too?.

Your breath hitches at how terribly right he is. It’s always half assed and most of the time you never finish, leaving you high and dry and it hurts whenever he leaves right after, stinging your heart and pride. Leaving you alone in bed to cry, wallowing in self pity.

“Plus, I’m way prettier.”

Of course, he speaks no lies. Jungkook’s the prettiest and handsomest you’ve ever seen. No one could compare nor compete. You’re always staring a little too long at his pretty plush lips and the shiny lip ring pierced into his skin you find so hot, glittering doe eyes, flawless features that always steals the breath from your lungs whenever you see him. He’s like a perfect daydream come to life.

“I just know I could have that pussy soaking for me in seconds.” He’s in your ear again and again his hand gently grips over your thigh, fingers sinking in between the skin where they meet.

The sudden touch has you snapping your head to look back at him, startled and he’s so close. If you lean in just a bit you could kiss him. Jungkook smiles his cute smile down at you as his hand kneads your plush thigh.

“Huh, you just need to hear my voice and have me look at you like this, don’t you?.” He rasps deeply. The sound rich in your ears that sends a pulse and multitude of flutters to your pussy.

He isn’t wrong. Jungkook doesn’t have to do much to get you wet and going. Especially when he lives in your mind most late nights.

He hums and pushes his hand further between your legs and you slightly pull them apart for him, falling into his sweet temptation. You bet his long and slender fingers would feel so good, better than your own on those nights when you’re desperate.

“I bet you’re so wet right now. I could take care of it.”

A soft moan escapes you at the first light stroke of his finger against your covered clit he finds easily.

“There she is, let me in baby, please.” He rubs it over a few more times, nail grazing it gently before his hand fully engulfs your heat, cupping it in his hold. Palm digging against your mound and rubbing it in a slow but hard tandem that pulls a loud moan from your throat, unable to hold it back and you allow your eyes to fall shut, basking in the pleasure he provides. Gently rocking your hips up against the firmness of his palm. He drops his head beside yours, groaning into your ear as he feels wetness seeping through your panties. Cock hardening to life, throbbing painfully and the tightness in his jeans is beginning to feel almost unbearable.

“I know you want me too.” Jungkook urges, breath picking up and suddenly you snap out of his spell, quickly removing his hand from between your legs.

No. It’s too much. You can’t let yourself fall too deep in whatever this is between you. It isn’t fair to Jungkook and yourself, not when he’s still in the picture.

“You’re delusional.” You spat with spite, scooting further away from him once again. Disappointed with every second that you almost let yourself get pulled astray into his tight clutches.

Jungkook scoffs, shaking his head. He grins amusedly and shuffles his way to you on his bed. “Maybe, but you are too if you think things are gonna work out with that little boy.”

“It might.” You retort weakly, although you don’t sound so sure yourself.

He cackles, throwing his head back.

“Oh, sweetheart it wouldn’t and you know it.”

Jungkook is beside you once again and continues on his little spiel.

“I know you like me too. You can’t stay away either. Stop lying to yourself. You want me to keep looking at you, want me to keep coming over and ask for stupid shit cause’ you know I just wanna see you. You want me to keep wanting you, but baby I could only hold out for so long.”

His words rattle you, stir something in you that you try to force down, but perhaps Jungkook is right. You like the guy, absolutely adore him and maybe if you had met him first, in different circumstances. One where you're a better version of yourself, not struggling, not so desperate for a new change in life, things could be different.

“Why do you like me so much?.” A frustrated sigh heaves past your lips, looking back at him with deep perplexity.

Who would like you like this?. Want you this way?.

You know he’s liked you ever since you moved in all those months ago and you’ve always wondered why. What did he see in you?. What made him want you this much?.

“Because I did the moment I saw you. It just happened. I think you’re the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen, always.” Jungkook’s eyes are practically heart shaped, staring back at you with such intensity yet a loving softness that makes your whole world spin out of control.

Smoke wafts between you and the now neglected bud between your fingers continue to burn just like your desire for him.

You don’t know if it would ever die like fiery embers, fade away into nothingness. It possibly couldn’t. He’s always fueling the fire.

“No one’s captured my sole attention so easily like you do. I’m so drawn to you and I can’t help it. I like how sweet you really are. I like watching you get excited over little things because I hardly get to see you that way. Like that time we stopped at the convenience store on the way home and you were so happy they restocked those jelly candies you like so much. It was really cute.”

Your breath hitches and your insides turn to mush.

Fuck, what is he doing?.

Jungkook chuckles, seemingly thinking of something else before he goes on to tell you more.

“You’re cute when you think you’re alone in the laundromat, with your earphones in, singing along to your music and doing little dances. You care, even if you get irritated with me sometimes, you still don’t hesitate to help and I know you’re smart. I’ve sneaked a peek of your architecture designs and ideas before in your room when you weren’t looking.”

He sees the second your eyes widen with shock and slight irritation but before you could say anything on the matter, he beats you to it.

“They’re great, you don’t need to give up something you love just for someone who doesn’t deserve you. You don’t need him at all to make it. You could do that on your own.” Jungkook speaks everything he means and the way he’s looking at you right now is scary because deep down you know it’s true. You tear your glossed over eyes from his ardent ones and shuffle off of his bed completely.

“You know, I came here to forget things but you’re only making it harder by bringing this shit up Jungkook. I don’t need this right now. I’d appreciate it if you could just mind your own fucking business for once.” You’re snagging your purse from his bedside table and yanking it onto your shoulder, putting out the neglected blunt on the ashtray near his soft glowing lamp light.

His brows pin together in deep confusion and hurries off his bed as well with abruptness, trailing after you.

“You know I can’t when it comes to you.”

Standing beside you in a second, eyes moving frantically over the side of your face. He places a hand upon your shoulder, shaking you gently for a second more of your attention.

What had he done?. He just told you half of what he loves and admires of you and then you're running away the next second, looking mad at him as if he’s the one who's to blame for the hell in your life.

“Would you please look at me?.”

You don’t give him that, too busy trying to get your heels back on as you hold onto his wall for support. You’re leaving and Jungkook’s panicking. He’s in front of you now, invading your space as you shift to get the other heel on.

“If you want to forget, I could make you.”

“I know what you really need, just say the words and I will.” He urges on, watching you intensely for your next move and impatiently of the words you speak.

“I need to go.” Is all you mutter, moving past him to his door as you reach for the old brass knob.

Jungkook’s fingers clutch tightly onto the band of your black skirt from behind as a last resort to stop you from twisting it open and leaving.

“Fine. If you leave, then this is the last time I’ll ever bother you. You want me to stay out of your business, I will. I’ll leave you alone for good.” You hear him huff in a threatening snarl, yanking his touch off of you as he backs away to give you the space you clearly wanted.

“I don’t want to keep waiting around for something that’s not gonna happen. I need to move on too.” He then spits with sharp bitterness.

You turn around to meet his frustrated dark orbs. Brows pinched in a mean furrow as he watches you.

It should be enough for you to walk away, to walk out of his room and never look back. He’s making it easy for you but so hard to do so at the same time. If this means not seeing him everyday, his pretty smiles, the talks you two share on the way home together and basking in the comfort he brings you by simply being within his presence. Abandoning the home he’s made in your heart. Fuck!. You can’t do it. You shouldn’t have gotten too close. It was going to hurt either way, you or him and all you’ve been doing is hurting him and ultimately yourself in the process.

“You’re always in the way. Why do you always make everything so goddamn hard, Jungkook.” You huff so frustratedly, shoulders dropping along with your resolve because you can’t do this anymore.

He shakes his head vehemently, jaw tensing as he takes a step closer. His heavy gaze pierces your being. It makes you feel small and pathetic. You are in this moment and so weak for Jungkook and all of what he makes you feel.

“No, you do that on your own. You want to stay miserable with that fucker be my guest, but you know I’d take care of you way better than him. I may not be rich like he is, but I can still give you everything you need.”

Jungkook states, now standing directly in front of you. He never loses the mean furrow or the frustration and burning anger in his eyes you witness. Baring them to you and it takes all of you to keep yourself rooted in place, to not step up to him, lean in and put out the fire yourself.

“I’ll always take care of you. Always make you feel wanted and special because you are to me. I love you but you make it so hard for me when you act like the dumb and weak little thing he wants you to be for him.” The nasty edge of the last sentence he grits through clenched teeth strikes a nerve within you. You know how awfully right he is. It’s draining and a pain how right Jungkook always is but never as much as it is being with him. Despite his crude words, his touch upon your cheek as he curls a strand of hair behind your ear is gentle and soft just how he is with you.

The way you fell for him.

“I want you to be my proud shining gem, my sweet girl.” Harsh gaze softening, cradling your cheek like you’re a precious porcelain doll. He whispers near your lips, pure adoration melting into you and your lustrous eyes warm with a passion that his heart yearns for. Eyes falling to your lips he’s aching on the inside to get a taste of, he can’t help it.

This time you can’t turn away. Can’t stop the feeling he's bloomed inside you ever since you met him in the hallway the first week you moved in all those months ago. This time you can’t fight it and push everything you feel for Jungkook in the deep crevices within that you never look for.

You let yourself feel it all. Your frustration, your weak temptations for the man standing before you that looks at you like you are the whole universe. Deep yearning and ache whenever he’s near. His anger, his frustration, his comfort and all his love. It’s all you truly want.

It’s what drives you to close the hair's breadth distance in between and meld your lips against his soft ones. You feel him go rigid and still for the briefest moment in slight surprise. It’s like electric currents shocking through him at once and he’s tangling his hand in your hair and the other at the side of your neck, kissing you back with just as much fervor. Both of your tongues wrestle together, ravishing each other like you’ve been starved all your life. Teeth clashing, mixed saliva staining the corners of your mouth and chin as you taste one another.

Jungkook pulls you by the waist and yanks you back with him towards the edge of his bed, manhandling you around as he pulls apart from your lips to push you back on his bed. He’s on you in a second and devouring your lips once again. Groaning into your mouth at the taste of you, so sweet and so addictive. Soft moans of yours into his mouth he swallows up and they get louder and desperate at the way he grinds his hips against your covered mound.

“Want you so fucking bad. Always.” Jungkook breathily moans against your cheek, lips traveling past your jaw and upon your neck. Suckling and mouthing hot wet kisses against your skin in his wake to explore your body.

You moan in response, tangling your fingers into his dark hair and tugging at the strands. His touch, kisses, everything feels so amazing. You can’t believe you kept yourself from this. From him for so long.

He paints his own marks into the side of your neck whilst his hands bunch your skirt up to expose your covered core in sexy black lace panties. He pulls his lips apart and lifts his head to peer down at you.

“Can I make you feel good?.” Jungkook groaned softly against you, smooth palm rubbing over your covered cunt and when his fingers brush over your clit through the fabric, how could you deny him when the simple touch of him makes you feel so damn good. Body hot, tingling and aching desperately for him.

“Yes, please! Please!.You softly moan, nodding your head rapidly up at him.

Jungkook chuckles lightheartedly, swiping strands of hair back from your flushed face.

“Heh, aw, you sound so pretty when you beg like that.”

Alas he skims his hand beneath the hem of your panties and plays with your slick folds, spreading them apart with his fingers. They drift lower and feel just how wet you already are and Jungkook groans in delight.

“Fuck, so wet baby. I’ll take care of you. I’ll show you how good I can, better than he ever could.”

Your body squirms underneath his big frame towering above you, whines and moans escaping you as he cops his feel of your hot pulsating pussy and a startled gasp tumbles past your lips when Jungkook suddenly tears your panties down your thighs quite aggressively till they fall off your feet.

He pushes your thighs apart and you spread them wider for him as he lowers himself down your body to fully engulf the beautiful sight of your exposed cunt to his hungry eyes. Glossy with your slick, puffed and throbbing just for him. A sharp intake of breath is heard as he stares intensely at your gaping hole. His cock grows harder at the sight and Jungkook has to hold himself back, fingers wrinkling the sheets hard in his hold at the side of your head.

God, you drive him to insanity and he knows he’s not gonna last long once he finally gets to be inside you.

“Jungkook, please don’t just stare.” His eyes snap up towards your face and sees the complete lust swirling in your irises. The furrow between your brows, begging him to do something just like your cunt throbs for the same thing.

“I need you.”

He moans throatily at your desperate plea and it has him springing into action. Leaning back up to smash his lips against yours with his fingers back between your wet folds. He swallows up your whines when his fingers rub your needy clit, gathering the juices you leak to spread all over your bud he plays with. Back arching and mouth falling open against his as he sinks two digits inside immediately with how drenched you absolutely are, coating them fully.

“Oh!. Oh my- fuck!-“ A near-sob racks through you, head falling back against the sheets.

“Feels good huh. You're squeezing my fingers so tight, baby.” Jungkook purrs in your ear, plunging his digits in and out of your plush walls in a maddening pace that already has you a quivering mess beneath him.

Obscene squelches of his fingers fucking your soaked pussy fill the otherwise silence of his bedroom. You don’t even remember when you last heard the remnants of the playlist he had playing long moments ago. All your clouded mind and body knows is the hot pleasure coursing through your veins, just how good Jungkook is making you feel.

Your breathy and whiny moans raise octaves higher the deeper he reaches inside your cunt each time he pounds his digits back in, finding that special spongy spot that gushes more of your essence, dripping down his hand and wetting his sheets below. He doesn’t care one bit of the mess you’re making, hell no, it only fuels his carnal desire to see you make an even bigger mess, to see just how fucking wetter he can get your pretty pussy for him.

“Right there huh?. Mmm, fuck you’re so hot. So perfect for me, sweetheart.” He’s so turned on, body buzzing with hot arousal watching you squirm and the way your wet pussy tightens around his fingers. No thoughts but your tight plush cunt, the hot sounds you make that sends his cock throbbing in his jeans begging for a feel of you. Filled with the sudden urge as he licks the side of your face up, tongue flattening and leaving a sheen of his saliva before biting the apple of your cheek hard with a deep groan rumbling against your skin.

The action you find oddly hot yourself and he knows it too by the way your pussy clenches around his fingers hard. He catches your pretty face that contorts deeply in pleasure, watching him with fucked out eyes, mouth wide open of your cute moans falling one after the other at the fast pace he fucks your cunt.

Fuck, how are you so fucking beautiful like this?. How do you always manage to outdo yourself and make him fall harder for you 100x more than he already has.

Needing to taste you all over again, he drives his tongue down your open mouth, sucking and wrestling with yours in a frantic heated rhythm. Jungkook practically devours you, never wanting to part and both your saliva mixed makes the kiss more messy and nasty than it already is.

He never ceases the harsh pace his fingers pound into you nor does he give you a moment to breath kissing you like he’ll never get to again.

“Mmm!- Ju- ngh!.” You struggle against him to get some air in, voice muffled against his mouth.

How he ravishes you and fucks your leaking pussy, it’s almost too much and the coil in your stomach further expands, almost ready to explode any moment at how heavenly you feel.

Jungkook gets one last long kiss of your lips then pulls apart finally and you get blessed with the sight of his rosy, plump lips with a sheen of your mixed salivas coating them. There’s small streaks of your smeared red lipstick at the corner of his lips and down his chin as well. He looks so pretty and the sight of him sends your cunt pulsating a multitude of currents around his fingers.

A whine of protest leaves you the second he backs away a bit, hands pushing your thighs higher against your chest and he lifts a brow at you to comply.

“Be a good girl and hold them up for me.” In a heartbeat, you hook your hands beneath the fold of your knees and keep them up like he wants.

“Good girl.” Jungkook hums with satisfaction and leans back over you, dropping his head against your forehead, dark lidded eyes boring into yours.

“Baby, I want you to watch with me as I make this perfect pussy squirt for me.”

You moan in response and when he shifts his head to look down, so do you and your breath gets caught in your throat.

Watching him continue to batter your pussy with his two long pretty fingers plunging in and out at a menacingly fast and hard pace. With his tattooed hand that is clad in his leather and silver bracelets, a thick black one with spikes. Eyes skimming over the veins that pop out prominently from the strain he’s putting on his tattooed arm to make you cum. Fingers reaching so deep in your pussy you nearly can’t take it anymore as he pounds and twists his digits in. It’s all enough to have you quake with immense pleasure, eyes wanting to fall shut but you fight to keep them open, orbs crossing over and the band in your tummy snaps at once as you cum hard, jets of your essence shooting out your gaping hole the moment Jungkook pulls his fingers out to see your pussy squirt like he so badly wanted to.

It splashes over your whole mound, wetting your thighs with droplets and soaking his sheets below your bottom as well as sprinkling some spots on his dark denim jeans.

“Holy shit!. That’s so fucking hot. You’re so- Mmm!- So hot, baby.” Jungkook growls almost animalistically, cupping both your cheeks and giving you a searing kiss, taking your bottom lip between his teeth and biting into the plump flesh before letting it go.

He nearly came in his pants at the sight of your pussy squirting and the obscene view of it soaking wet, still pulsating from the intense pleasure he gave you.

“One more time before I fuck your pussy, wanna see it again.” Jungkook pleads while pecking your lips with chaste kisses over and over.

“No!. I don’t thin-“ You immediately shake your head whining at the thought, you're so sensitive and you’re not so sure you can do it again. It was a whole new intense feeling for you.

Jungkook seems to think otherwise, nodding his head down at you.

“Yes, baby. Yes you can. I’ll fuckin’ make you do it again for me.”

With that, he’s shoving the same two digits back into your sloppy cunt, sinking in knuckle deep and fucking his fingers in your pussy twice as fast and hard. So determined to make you explode like a waterfall once more.

Your moans become uncontrollable, high in pitch as you throw your head back. Body buzzing with hot searing pleasure, hips and legs shaking violently as you lay there and take it. His fingers reach so deep, jackhammering into your g spot over and over in a frenzy.

Jungkook sucks in a deep breath, moaning along with you. So addicted to watching the sight of your beautiful tear stained face cry out in ecstasy then down below where he fucks your soaked pussy, fingers drenched in your sweet juices. Damn, he doesn’t know which sight to focus on more.

You’re quaking with intense pleasure, so loud and crying out for him. He feels a hand of yours clinging onto the front of his shirt and tugs, needing something to help you grasp reality but you’re too far gone. Too drunk off of the way he’s making you feel with his fingers alone.

“Shit!. You’re gonna cum. Gonna fuckin’ squirt for me. Can feel it sweetheart. Squeezing me so damn tight.” Your walls grip his digits so tight he almost can’t pull out all the way, so he keeps abusing them deeper against that sweet spot of yours.

“I- fuckkk!. Jungkook!. I can’t- Nghh!. Oh!.” You sob aloud, almost pathetically as your body shakes violently underneath him. You’re so close, he can feel it and Jungkook is just as desperate as you are to have you reach euphoria.

“Yes you can. C’mon baby, let go for me. Fuckin’ give it to me please!.” Jungkook coos down at you with low growls and pleas of his own. It’s all it takes to have you reach your end. “Hah!. Fuck fuck fuckkkk.” Convulsing, eyes blown in ecstasy staring back at him as you cum so hard around his digits. Splashing more of your essence all over his hand and pussy absolutely drenched with your wetness.

Jungkook stares mesmerized at the mess he’s made of you and he can’t help but to play with you a bit more. Splaying his fingers flat over your folds, further spreading your wetness all over. You’re so soaked, swollen red and still so sensitive. You push his hand away with a helpless yelp of protest.

He surprises you as he lifts his hand and licks your slick off of his fingers, sticking the same ones he fucked you with in his mouth. Sucking on them and moaning in delight at your taste as he does so. A breath of yours hitches, feeling hot all over once again at the lewd sight of him enjoying the taste of you off his fingers.

“Mmm, so fuckin’ good. Love your taste…need more.”

Before you know it Jungkook lowers himself between your spread legs, face diving first into your pussy. A sharp gasp escapes you fleetingly, chest heaving and you watch from above as he laps at your folds. Drunken orbs staring up at you before they fall shut with brows furrowed deeply in pleasure like he’s the one getting eaten out.

“S-stop!. Pleasseee!.” You nearly scream as he tongue fucks your hole, thighs clamping tight around his head as you try to wiggle feel, but Jungkook doesn’t care and wraps his arms around your thighs to stop you from thrashing in his hold.

“Mmngh…just a taste, baby.” The vibrations of his growl against your pussy sends a rack of shivers through you and you whine helplessly, trying to pull him off by the grip of his hair.

“Hah!. Uh- that’s enough!.” You yank harder and this time he relents, mouth pulling off of your slick pearl with a wet suck.

The taste of you lingers on his tongue and he’s become so addicted to it. He didn’t want to stop and have you keep cumming on his face, in his mouth, on his tongue and drink all you have to offer up like the best thing in the world. Jungkook rests his forehead against your sweaty one, heavy breaths mixing with your pants and fanning over your cheeks. Carnal passion burning in his pretty smudge eyeliner orbs. He’s so fucking hot and your pussy clenches hard staring up at him. He pecks your lips once and twice more, missing them on him.

“Next time, I’ll make you cum on my tongue. Eat this sweet pussy for hours till you beg me to fuckin stop and trust me, I won’t want to.” Jungkook promises, backing away to finally unbuckle his studded belt, watching you as he does so and your pretty pussy that still throbs for him.

His words catch you off guard for a moment and excitement courses within you at the thought of doing this again. Smile growing wide as you watch him get his pants off while you lift your own top overhead, fingers undoing your bra and tossing it aside.

He stills for a moment, sucks in a breath at the sight of you, plump breasts, all naked, and exposed lying there just for him.

“Fuck, look at you. So beautiful.” Jungkook whispers more to himself as he lifts his own t-shirt overhead and you marvel at the beauty he is. He’s well defined, built of scrumptious muscles, prominent veins you have a certain attraction for with a snatched waist you're almost jealous of and deep v-lines leading to his clean shaven dick that stands tall and proud. Your eyes immediately zero in on it. He’s painfully hard, big and girthy, mushroom tip an angry red with beads of precum leaking down his shaft. It twitches a few times and he can’t help but to wrap his hand around himself, squeezing his base and lightly jacking himself off for a bit.

His dick is so pretty just like him. Every inch of his body is absolutely beautiful.

It’s so hot seeing him touch himself and watching you with heavy lust filled eyes as he does so. It has you slithering a hand past your naval and parting your folds, slipping your fingers inside. A soft moan escapes you at the feeling and it seems to have snapped something in Jungkook because suddenly he’s yanking your hand out of your pussy and pulling it up to his lips. Sucking on your digits for another taste of you. Throwing your hand back down and leaning over your smaller frame as he grabs you by the throat with slight pressure.

You're a bit startled but so excited and utterly turned on by him and the slight aggression he shows towards you, wrapping your legs around his waist to pull him in even closer. He grabs himself by the base and lines his cock with your leaking hole, resting his mushroom tip against it just barely pushing in.

“Do you still want this with me?. Tell me.” He adds more pressure upon your throat, lightening his grip a moment after to have you answer him properly.

Though you nod your head frantically at his words along with desperate pleas falling rapidly from your lips.

“Yes. I want you so bad, Jungkook. Only you.”

“Fuck!.” He hisses, pushing the entirety of his hard length inside your pussy to the hilt in one go with no resistance due to how wet you still are. Body going still and muttering curses against your cheek, breath hitching at how heavenly you feel around his cock. So fucking wet, plush walls chocking him tight and the flutters of your pussy inside he can feel has him on edge already, eyes nearly rolling because fuck, do you feel so goddamn good.

“Fucking tight. God, feel so perfect baby.” He nuzzles his head into the crook of your neck, sucking and biting more marks into your skin since the ones from before are starting to fade. You’re his now and if you don’t know it already he’ll make you.

“Mm!. Please fuck me Jungkook.” You moan wantonly, bucking your hips up for friction. His cock fills you up so good you can hardly think straight, being stretched out by him.

“Shh, baby. I’ll make you feel so good. Gonna fuckin’ ruin you.” He lifts his head up, staring directly into your eyes and tightening his hold around your throat again as he drags his big cock out till the fat tip, slamming back into you hard. Repeating the motion over and over at a maddening pace.

Both your groans and moans fill his bedroom mixed with skin slapping and the obscene sound of his cock plunging deep into your soaking pussy with wet squelches.

“Harder!. Hngh. Please!.” You grab at his shoulder and biceps, nearly sobbing when he gives you just what you want. Pounding your pussy deeper and rough with hard thrusts, heavy balls smacking against your ass. Both your legs are tossed over his shoulders and he’s got your thighs pressed against your chest with his body nearly crushing you. He loves the way you look beneath him, so small and cute.Tattooed hand still around your throat choking you with enough pressure to send you reeling.

“So fuckin’ pretty. Look at you, taking my cock so well.” He groans roughly against your lips, slipping his tongue out and into your mouth. Making out with you in a sloppy and heated manner.

“Nngh…feel so- Ahh!. So- so good!.” His cock fucks into you so deep, hitting your sweet spot directly each time. Legs shaking, body quaking and face contorted in immense pleasure, tears streak your pink cheeks as you whine and sob like a desperate little thing begging to cum undone.

“Know it does, baby. Pussy squeezing me so good. Gonna fuckin’ cum soon.” His words are broken heaves, brows pinched and mouth open of moans that have you clenching harder on his cock, making it difficult pulling halfway out with each drag. He's definitely not gonna last long like he initially thought.

Your soaked pussy hugs him snuggly and the lewd sight of it swallowing his big cock, creamy white ring surrounding his base and balls with both your essence mixed. He throbs inside of you, nearing his own release.

“Gonna let me cum inside?, sweetheart.” Jungkook grunts hotly above you, hips snapping harshly into yours.

“Mhmm!. Please!. Want it so bad, Jungkook.” Your high pitched squeals and pleas are like music to his ears. Each sound drives him closer to his sweet end.

“Fuck, keep begging me like that and I’ll bust inside this pretty cunt.” He gruffs, stomach caving in with each clench of your pussy as you buck your hips up to meet his thrusts.

“Ohh!. Please!. Want you to fill me up. Make a mess in my pussy, please!.” You babble out, moaning aloud as you do so and cling onto him tighter. Your tits bounce so hypnotizingly with every pound you take and Jungkook removes his hand from your neck to fondle each one, pulling and twisting your puffy nubs that makes you an even whiner mess.

Jungkook loves this so much, and thinks he could never get used to this because he’s always going to want to see you this way. Over and over now that he’s got a taste and feel of you.

“Did you ever let him?.” He doesn’t know what propels him to ask. Voice an octave deeper in a husk and almost stern. Maybe it’s the way you squeeze around him to Heaven and back, or the thought that he’s seen you this way before.

Did that asshole ever have you like this?. Have you a crying and moaning mess?. Creaming his cock and looking like the perfect sin while doing so. Looking beautiful and so drunk off his dick fucking you so good. He possibly couldn’t right?.

With rapid shakes of your head at his words, you moan your truths to him. So fucked out and desperate to even think straight.

“Not w-without a condom…no one’s ever-“

His steady rhythm falters and he presses his weight into you, holding you tight against his embrace as his arms wrap under you. Head against yours and staring down into your pretty drunken stare.

“Shit!. Hngh. Gonna f-fuckkk…claim this pussy. You're mine, baby.”

You keep your gaze focused on him but your eyes roll back once you feel his hand slip down in between and rub your clit with his calloused fingers in rapid figures of eight.

“Cum with me baby, please.” Jungkook pleads hoarsely, hot breath panting against your face.

“C’mon, milk my fuckin’ cock. Cum for me, sweetheart.”

His cock pounds into you so deliciously with his fingers on your clit and the way he stares down at you, cooing filthy words, looking so hot as he does so. It's all overwhelming and what snaps the coil in your tummy. You clench so hard around him as you cum, soaking his cock with your essence. Jungkook follows in close pursuit, painting your walls with spurts of his white hot release, cock pressed so deep and hips stuttering against you.

“Fucckkk!. Shit!. Hah…Nghh.” His body falls against yours, chest heaving with unsteady breaths as he tries to calm his racing heart.

You’re no better, panting and staring up at the ceiling basking in the afterglow of the amazing pleasure and orgasm he gave you, his cum seeping out of you.

Jungkook lifts his head up to meet your gaze just as you look down and he shuffles closer in dire need to kiss you but a wince tumbles out of you suddenly that he pauses abruptly midway.

“It hurts.” You say with a soft groan, wiggling your back, indicating the spiked band cuffing his wrist was poking against your skin in an uncomfortable way.

You hadn’t noticed it until now, too lost in pleasure during sex to pay any mind to it before.

“Oh fuck!- I’m sorry.” Jungkook is quick to apologize, leaning up from your body to remove his arms. He rips the band off his wrist at once, pouting at the obvious indents he also notices he left above your chest where he had grabbed you by the throat during sex.

“It’s okay, I’m fine.” You reassure him with a small smile, hand clasped over his own that softly rests against your stomach.

It’s grown silent but not uncomfortable and now that you’re both not clouded with lust or driven by overwhelming emotions, Jungkook wants to tell you that this meant something to him. That everything he does for you will always mean something deeper to him. He doesn’t know if you’ve gotten it through your head yet just how much you really mean to him. How much he’s loved you all this time when you were too busy with that fool, stuck in your own four walls and in your own world most of the time.

You never really let him in, but he wants to know more of your world. Explore it with you and expand it with him.

Would it be something that you would want?. Or would you go back to your rich boyfriend who treats you like crap each time you two get together.

With a deep breath, Jungkook gathers himself before he could tell you all of this and he clears his throat, breaking the silence at once.

“Listen, I wanted to-“

A blaring ringtone rudely interrupts Jungkook and you both stare back at each other, brows furrowed in confusion. You lean up a bit and he backs up to give you space as you reach for your discarded purse on his floor. Bringing it back with you on his bed, you grab for the device inside and see the name lit up across the screen.

It’s him.

You hesitate and don’t answer it, peering up at Jungkook who watches you intensely. He has that look on his face and glazed over eyes silently pleading with you.

He quickly snatches the phone from you so suddenly, peeking at the screen before turning it off completely. Jungkook’s pushing you back down into his bed, hovering over you.

“Don’t go back to him. Stay.” He pleads, desperately so.

Please choose me.

You know what he’s really asking of you, you see it in his eyes and your heart sinks when you realize what he’s possibly thinking right now.

Reaching up, you cradle his cheek and bring his face down to you, catching his lips with yours in a deep kiss. Pulling back, you promise him with your whole heart, every fiber inside you burning to be with him.

He’s the only one who's ever truly made you feel wanted, loved and saw you for who you are. Jungkook never once tried to control you, take over your life, isolate you, tell you pretty lies, tear you down only to bring you back up and do it all over again because he liked seeing you cry. Never threatened to hurt you if you didn’t comply with whatever he wanted and he sure as hell never came to you smelling like another woman's intoxicating perfume.

He wasn’t like him and you were so done being with someone who doesn’t treat you like you deserve. For once, you choose happiness and your happiness belongs with Jungkook and the life you could finally start living for yourself.

“I won’t go anywhere, Jungkook. I want to stay with you.”

Jungkook knows what you mean when you say those words, he can feel it. He can see it reflecting back at him and his heart has never felt so good before because for once, his happiness chose him back and he’d never trade it for anything in this world.

A/N: I really hope you enjoyed this!. Tysm for reading 🫶🏻 pls let me know yours thoughts & feelings 🎀

[theysaidhush]

The cat from across the garden.

Alt. Title -> Under the Weeping Willow

-> CatHybrid!Jungwon x CatHybrid!Shy!Reader, slight Jake x Reader and Jay x Jungwon

-> Jungwon was pleased with his life, until he saw you, the cat from across the garden.

-> Fluffy fluff, PoorStudent!Jake is kinda a bad owner but I swear he treats you like a princess, Lovesick!Jungwon is a menace, Rich!Jay agenda, Smut (p in v, unprotected sex, Jungwon is mounting you and it's hot, fingering, Breeding Kink, cream pie, slight nipple play, Reader goes into sub-space, even tho it feels like it's not dub-con)

-> Shoutout to my ♡ anonie that I love so much, to p1h-delulu (I'm sure it's the wrong name but you know who you are) for liking every single post that I post (duh) and to @adaamazing who asked to be tagged ! Almost forgot my moots @unh0ly-dr3am3r silly me ugh ! Feedback is appreciated 💝

Jungwon loved being an indoor cat. In 2023, hybrids had the right to be as independent as any human. They went to university, worked, owned their own apartments. But not Jungwon. Like some hybrids, he was said to belong to his owner. With a contract, a signature and a commitment to take good care of the hybrid, and so on. Kind of like an adopted child who stayed at home even after coming of age. What need did he have to go out and interact with people ? Why would he go to work or study when he was fed, housed and showered with affection in his master's apartment ? Ah, seriously. He loved living a life of ease.

"Jungwon, gotta go, see you !"

"See you tonight !" he nodded and smiled at his owner, Jay, a young American with whom he'd been at the side for almost four years now, and who never failed to provide for his needs. Jay patted him on the head before leaving. He huffed and rolled his eyes at the sight of his disappearing friend. He kept asking himself why he always had to leave him alone like that. The young boy looked around, lost in thought, exploring all the possibilities open to him. He could go and steal from the fridge, tear up his master's white sheets just to annoy him, or watch TV. All these proposals sounded tempting, but Jungwon would be content to read the mangas that had thoughtfully been placed at his disposal. There was even the latest volume of Jujutsu Kaisen !

So that's what he did, stretching out in the comfortable bed he shared with his master, tail wagging lazily as his big almond eyes scanned the panels of the book. The surrounding heat should have been stifling; summer was around the corner, after all. Jungwon was unable to stop smiling, rolling left and right, perfectly content with the life he was leading, purring in the sheets. But as his eyelids grew heavy, the urge to sleep all too much, Jungwon rose from the bed, leaving everything in a mess, and headed for the balcony of their quite spacious apartment, fists clenched as he rubbed his eyes, crinkled by the heaviness of his eyelids, fatigue almost driving him into the door of the small exterior.

The balcony wasn't very big, but it wasn't small either. Jungwon, 1.74 m tall, could lie down on it. The safety barrier, a thick plate of glass that allowed him to see what was going on in the identical balcony some 150 meters from theirs, wasn't very high either. Standing up, it reached just above his waist. In fact, if he leaned over too far, he risked falling into the small shared garden downstairs. The layout of their apartment was quite practical. They lived in a one-storey building with only two apartments. The one downstairs had been vacant for some time. Opposite, on the other hand, the only thing he could see was the almost identical building just across the street, if it wasn't for the fact that this one was much smaller. Jay had once told him that the layout was almost the same, except that both apartments were smaller. Add to that the lovely shared garden in the middle of both houses. In the tenants' contract, it was stipulated that the garden was shared between the four apartments, but the cat had never seen anyone venture into it. On several occasions, though rarely, he had seen a boy going in. But in those moments he was between sleep and consciousness, so his memories were a little hazy. Not that he really cared.

Yawning, he slumped onto his back on the long gray cushion that lined the balcony floor and spread his arms and legs, letting the warmth of the sun warm him. But suddenly, his ears twitched by their own volition. A sound had reached them. Incessant, repetitive, but above all annoying, since all he wanted to do was sleep. Sitting cross-legged on his cushion, tail wagging rapidly from annoyance, Jungwon's gaze scanned the surroundings. It was usually silent. It had only taken him two weeks' vacation with Jay for these birds to have the good sense to come back and bother him ? This thought made him realize that his scent was no longer lingering on the balcony. He'd have to remedy that, but first he'd have to chase those birds away. His pupils narrowed to a fine slit, ready to show his pretty fangs to any bird that dared sabotage his nap.

He leaned over a little and swept his gaze across the garden, looking for the culprit, but finding none. Gradually, his eyes made their way up the opposite building, and at last, they settled on a silhouette. How strange, Jungwon couldn't remember having a neighbor. Frowning, he detailed the figure with a critical eye, then his eyes opened wide at the sight of the source of the noise. Jungwon had excellent eyesight, so this figure seemed to be sitting right in front of him. His eyes followed the movements of the brush the person was holding in her pretty, slender fingers, then settled on the subject of those ministrations. A magnificent bushy tail, pale gray but shiny, and seemingly unconditionally soft. Jungwon wanted to slip his fingers into it. He looked up to see who owned it, and was greeted by the sight of a young woman, no older than himself, her ears folded back on her skull, a persistent pout on her lovely features.

Jungwon tilted his head, curious. She didn't seem in a good mood. She didn't look pleasant. What if she was trying to assert her territorial rights ? Was he destined to have to fight her every time he came out on the balcony for a good time ? Ah, that was out of the question. Jungwon loved lying in the sun, napping to the chirping of the birds, watching the clouds pass overhead, grooming himself. He didn't want it to change, he liked his every habit, he liked his routine, he didn't like what was unexpected and unpredictable. So he was about to hiss, curling his lips and flattening his ears against his skull, when suddenly the girl across the garden lifted her head.

The first thing the cat noticed was the pout that adorned his face. Her lip was pouting and her cheeks were puffed up like a hamster's. Jungwon was surprised to find her…cute ? He couldn't stop his face from returning to normal and his eyes from widening, forming two black beads as his pupils dilated, showing his curiosity. His new neighbor's ears perked up in turn and her face changed, adopting a startled look. She didn't know she had a neighbor either, apparently. Jungwon's sharp gaze didn't miss the way her pretty tail twitched under his fingers, or the way she flinched, sitting back on her haunches in case she needed to leave in a hurry. She tilted her head, curious, before leaning forward a little and smiling softly, greeting Jungwon with a shy wave of her hand. As soon as she had done so, she moved away on her hands and knees, her gaze never leaving his, before speeding off once she was near the glass door of her balcony.

Jungwon suddenly felt as if he couldn't see properly. In the past, his colorful world could keep him lost in thought for hours on end. His vision had no limits; it didn't stop at the sky or the stars. Now, however, he felt as if someone had put a cardboard box around his head. That he could only see in front of him, see that famous balcony, that tail sticking out of the wall, wagging from time to time, its owner peeking out from time to time to see if her new neighbor had left.

Jungwon felt as if all he wanted, wished for, was her. He wanted to hug her, stroke her hair, see that pout again, groom her and bask in the sun with her. His favorite color now was the fur on her tail, pale gray. Everything he'd found interesting before no longer made sense. Knocking glasses off Jay's counter, hiding his shoes, it was all futile now. She was the only thing that made sense. He was lovesick.

"Jakey !" you rushed to the door, leaving your hiding place behind the wall, near the French windows, to greet your best friend and owner. Your situation was similar to Jungwon's, but your characters were very different. And unlike the cat across the garden, you didn't have the luxury of living in a big apartment, nor did you have the luxury of breaking things because you knew Jake couldn't afford to replace them. So you were docile and gentle, always clamoring for his attention when he came home from his long days at work.

"Baby ! How was your day ? Did you nap in the sun ? I left the balcony doors open." he asked as he dropped his bag to the floor, opening his arms wide for you to step inside.

You threw yourself into his arms, savoring his embrace as you rubbed your head affectionately against his. You couldn't respond as a heavy purr escaped you in a continuous rhythm, making Jake smile as he swayed from one foot to the other, making you twirl left and right.

"Baby, I'm sorry, I'm really tired. I'll go take a shower and I'll meet you in bed okay ?"

Your purring suddenly stopped and, gradually, you loosened your grip around Jake's neck. For a minute, you just stared at the ground, searching for the right words to say, but finally decided not to spoil his evening. Your owner was doing his best to make sure you had a roof over your head and enough food on the table, so you couldn't ask too much from him, right ? It was bad enough that he was a student, but he'd also decided to take you with him when he left Australia, not wanting to be separated from you. So he had two mouths to feed, courses to attend and revise, and a job where he had to do his best for fear of being replaced by someone else who needed the work just as much as he did.

But you ? You did little more tan make him draw on his reserves and make him buy you clothes and accessories every time he went out. Well, you didn't ask him to, he just went gaga on you and couldn't help but buying the clothes in the shop front because he thought that it would look good on you. You had nothing to complain about. You had no right to wish he'd sit beside you on the balcony on a sunny afternoon and brush your tail; you had no right to ask him to spend an entire evening cuddling you, rubbing behind your ears, when he woke up early the next morning. You had no right to demand that he take care of you; that was selfish of you. You could do as you did today, do it yourself and grumble. Just like you did last week when you moved into that new apartment. So you pushed that ugly feeling of envy to the back of your mind and looked up, a little smile on your lips, gentle and understanding, and you nodded.

"Thanks Baby." Jake kissed your forehead, kicked off his shoes, grabbed his bag and then made a bee-line toward your shared bedroom, missing the way your ears had drooped the instant he'd disappeared from your sight, tail dangling.

D-1

The next afternoon, the call of the heat was far too tempting. You were bored out of your mind in your little studio, there was no TV or console, and Jake had taken his computer with him. You were doomed to roll around in your shared bed, count the number of fake glow-in-the-dark stars you'd stuck to the ceiling for the hundred and twenty-third time since you'd moved in, or talk to your pet stuffed animal. But the sun's rays streaming through the slippery doors and across the floor looked comforting. You were sure that underneath you could fall asleep until Jake returned. But being the shy cat that you were, you didn't want to see that imposing cat across the garden again. When you moved in, you were sure you smelled another hybrid. That was him. The cat from the apartment directly in front of you.

Sighing, you slumped full-length onto your stomach, caressing with your fingertips the faded piece of carpet that Jake had wanted to put under the bed for some reason you didn't yet know. Your tail hanging off the bed suddenly caught your attention. Since you'd moved in, its color had faded and it was much less soft than before. It was your pride and joy, and you loved to stroke it or curl up around it in winter, it was so comfortable and silky. Jake was also very fond of your tail; he often said that he met a lot of hybrids at university, but none of them had a tail as pretty as yours. Huffing, you sat up on the bed, perfectly proud of the idea that had just crossed your mind: you were going to brush yourself and give some color back to your pile of fur. Maybe then Jake would cuddle you again instead of slouching off to sleep like a starfish.

Nodding, a big smile on your face, you stood up and walked over to the drawer Jake had emptied so you could put your beauty products in. You could count them on the five fingers of your hand, but the gesture and the intention had made you so happy that Jake didn't even have the heart to feel guilty about not being able to give you what you wanted or needed. But as your gaze wandered to the corner of the drawer where you usually put your brush, you found it empty. Devoid of your favorite beauty tool. Then you were struck by the realization that you'd left it on the balcony yesterday.

Dejected, you let yourself fall to the floor, glancing from time to time at the parquet floor by the glass doors, which was brilliantly lit by the sun's warm rays. Ah, you really wanted to take a nap on the balcony now. You took your courage in both hands and slowly, like a cat approaching its prey, moved towards the door without ever leaving your place on the floor, crawling on your hands and knees, your tail wagging nervously behind you. The sun's reflection prevented you from seeing properly outside, so, with a hesitant hand, you took hold of the handle and gently slid the door open, leaving it wide enough for you to pass through, but also to close it quickly if necessary.

Your palms rested on the concrete that made up your balcony and you sighed with contentment at the sensation of warmth beneath your fingers. It was so comforting. You looked up at the balcony on the opposite side and were only half-surprised to see that the long cushion used as a mattress was occupied. So you hesitated, your knee stopping mid-air, unsure whether to simply pick up your brush or bask in the sun, minding your own business. What a dilemma.

Jungwon, who had been sitting here for a good hour, hadn't taken his eyes off your balcony even once. He'd been waiting for you to come out so he could see you again. You had been haunting his thoughts since yesterday. He'd been distant all evening, staring into nothingness as he was thinking about you. He hadn't gone to ask Jay for his "Welcome home bitch" caress, hadn't replied when Jay pointed out with amusement that he'd behaved like a good kitten today, and hadn't once hissed at him. What had really alarmed the American, however, was when Jungwon came to bed, pupils dilated, still lost in thought, and started kneading his stomach while demanding scratching. But Jay wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. Just because his cat, who was independent and usually fell asleep grumbling when he tried to pet him, was now accepting his caresses, didn't mean he should panic.

In short, Jungwon had been waiting for you since last night. So when the glass door gently slid open and let him catch a glimpse of you, he couldn't help the purr that resonated in the hollow of his throat. Like a deer caught in the headlights, you raised your head, freezing, waiting to see what his next move would be. And Jungwon knew exactly what to do at that moment. At least, his instincts knew, and what else could he do but listen to his instincts.

He tried to look as small as possible and laid down on his back, watching you as your silhouette appeared upside down to him, a loud purr escaping from his throat. You didn't look convinced, but Jungwon knew that you no longer perceived him as a threat, at least for the time being. He also knew that his smell and the sound of his purring had reached your ears, since the pheromones you unconsciously let escape from your body told him you were relaxed. However, even as you tiptoed towards your brush, you remained seated by the door, ready to leave at the slightest sign of aggression on his part. With a slow, repetitive gesture, you began to brush your fur, glancing from time to time at a completely relaxed and enamored Jungown, lying on his bed, watching you repeat the same gesture tirelessly. What a great day.

D-3

"Jay !" Jungwon smiled, rushing into his eldest's arms, hugging him affectionately while purring loudly.

Jay didn't know what to say, what to do. He recoiled and couldn't stop his face from twisting into a concerned grimace. In all the years he'd known and lived with Jungwon, the cat had never given him such a warm welcome. It was fascinating. And frightening.

Trying to act as if nothing had happened, Jay awkwardly returned Jungwon's embrace, not being usually the affectionate type. But he couldn't very well push him away when, for the first, or rather second time in almost five years, Jungwon was demonstrating affection for him. Admittedly, it was an unexpected change, but also a welcomed one. For three days, his cat hadn't broken anything, raided the fridge or torn up his sheets. Whatever had happened to him, it must surely have been something positive.

Jay finally managed to detach himself from the young man and set about removing his shoes, when he suddenly froze. No. There was nothing normal about this behavior. He shouldn't be happy about it. The heat of Jungwon had already passed, and the next heat was still a long way off. It was selfish of him to be content and satisfied with the actions of his otherwise distant cat. Something was going on with Jungwon if he suddenly acted all lovey-dovey with him.

The American sat down on the sofa and didn't even need to call out for his cat, since the latter had followed close behind and was now laying with its head in his lap, its tail wagging lazily on the edge of the sofa. Jay took a deep breath and began mindlessly stroking Jungwon's black ears, hesitating several times before finally asking, "Jungwon, are you feeling…good ? Not sick or anything ?"

Jungwon turned his head towards his owner so that his face faced his, tilting his head in disbelief. For a few brief seconds, Jay saw this glint of malice and something akin to disdain, an expression with which he was very familiar because of his cat. But he also saw that it had come and gone, while Jungwon, curious, shook his head to indicate that he didn't feel weird.

"Did something happen today ?"

Despite the way Jungwon had dismissed this question by shaking his head, Jay knew instantly that something had happened. Jungwon had smiled stupidly and his pupils had dilated in a way the boy had never seen before. His gaze had become distant, almost dreamy, and then the black cat had ended the discussion by lying on his side, towards the French windows leading to their little balcony, his purring doubling in strength. Ah, Jay now had two problems: he couldn't move since his cat had taken up residence on him, and on top of that he was acting strangely. Ah, what a perfect day.

D-4

"Jakey ? Jakey ! Jake !"

"What ?!" The Australian boy snapped, his head turning in your direction, a frown on his face. He'd dropped his pen and pushed his chair back from his little desk at breakneck speed, causing you to take three steps backwards, looking guilty, ears folded back against your skull. He exhaled heavily and ran a hand through his hair, restraining the urge to tear up his course sheets that he'd been staring at all evening. The whole three weeks, in fact. "What do you want ? What do you need ?"

"I-" You stammered, standing in front of him like a child being scolded. Your tail wagged nervously behind you and you began to play with the edges of your sweater. Under the pressure of his gaze, your cheeks flushed, embarrassed. "Nothing, just filling silly… 'M sorry…"

Jake huffed as he returned to his desk. He really wanted to give you all the love you deserved, but right now, if he wanted to be able to give you what you wanted and more, the last thing he needed was to repeat his year. He wasn't to be distracted by your adorable pout, let alone spend thirty minutes playing with you, even if you brought him your toys as you had done over the past few days. He couldn't afford it; he had to be the responsible one for the sake of your future. Even if it meant letting you down a little. You were a cat, you were also independent, right ?

You frowned not in anger but in frustration. For the past few days, you'd had this irrepressible urge to make yourself heard by Jake. You wanted him to listen to you, to see you, to cuddle you, to love you. But you tried so hard to push those feelings deep into your heart, knowing full well that you couldn't be a distraction for him. And yet, a little voice inside your head kept urging you to meow until he paid attention to you.

You stood behind Jake for a few minutes, part of you hoping that maybe he'd turn around and give you a hug, or let you rest your head in his lap while he worked, but none of that happened. Not even after ten minutes. Not even after thirty minutes. Or an hour. You were still standing behind him, your feet and body begging you to move, to sit, your limbs tingling, indicating that you were becoming numb. And that's what you were becoming. Numb.

"Oh my God yes finally !" Jake sighed with a mixture of joy and fatigue, big dark circles under his eyes and finished cups of coffee stacked next to his laptop. He'd spent hours on this project and was very pleased with it. He wouldn't have to work this weekend and could concentrate fully on his barista job. He might even be able to work overtime to buy you that new console game you'd been talking about after seeing the advert on TV. Yes, that's what he was going to do.

Happy and pleased with his idea, he turned to the faded sofa in the middle of the room to tell you of his genius, "Baby !" But you weren't there. You weren't lying on your stomach, snuggled under a soft comforter, reading your favorite book for the third time. Confused, he scanned his apartment, looking for your silhouette. You sometimes liked to lie on the floor when it was too hot. But you weren't there. But your favorite ball, the one you loved to play catch with Jake, was. Miserable, alone, in the middle of the dimly lit living room. The same one you'd brought him earlier in the evening.

Jake's eyes widened and he had what seemed like one last burst of caffeine, allowing it to remind him of how he'd rejected you hours before. "Oh shit shit shit." Slipping a hand nervously through his hair, he scrambled to his feet, nearly knocking over his chair with the force with which he'd stood up. "Baby com'here !" His calls fell on deaf ears and no sound reached him. He didn't have to look for you, since his apartment consisted of just three rooms. The bathroom, which also served as a toilet, the small living room where only a desk, a commode and a sofa could fit, and his bedroom, which consisted of a wall cupboard and a large double bed. He made his way into your room, silently hoping that you were sleeping peacefully, cuddling your tail. But the sight that greeted him was far different from the scene he'd imagined. You were awake, and you weren't in bed. You were sitting in front of the French window that led to the little balcony that Jake didn't like all that much. You, on the other hand, loved to groom yourself there in the afternoons, when the sun was at its zenith, rocking you in its comforting warmth.

He ignored this strange situation, which should have set him thinking, and only glanced outside through the closed window, oblivious to the faint night-light lit in the opposite building. He stroked your head and you gasped, raising your big dilated eyes to him. Ah, Jake felt so loved. Smiling, albeit tiredly, he lifted you into his arms, closing the window curtain with a quick tug, again oblivious to the way your ears had briefly folded.

"I'm sorry Baby, I'm just trying to do something nice for the both of us, didn't mean to snap at you like that." He set you down on the bed then slumped over you, blowing playfully on your face to see your face contort into the little grimace he loved so much.

You fidgeted, trying to push his face away from yours so he'd stop tickling you by rubbing his face against yours. You didn't hold a grudge and loved him so much that you couldn't bear to stay angry with him for more than a few minutes. Scratch that, you'd never been angry with him. "It's 'kay Jakey."

A few minutes passed as he stroked your hair affectionately, then he stood up and undressed, keeping only his boxers on, before snuggling up to you, whispering in the hollow of your ear, "I love you Baby, hope you know it."

And you smiled, rubbing your head against his cheek, wrapping your arms around his torso and your tail around his leg before whispering "I love you too Jakey..." between two purrs.

D-7

It was time for Jungwon to come and perch on the balcony, watching you brush or bask in the sun. It was a routine, an unspoken thing between the two of you. One would always wait for the other, lie down or sit on the balcony, ears perked up and eyes fixed on the opposite window, watching for the slightest movement. This time Jungwon had arrived much earlier, somewhere around eleven a.m., impatiently waiting for you to come and sit on the floor of your balcony. As usual, you opened the balcony when the sun was high in the sky and sat gracefully on the floor, which incidentally didn't look at all comfortable for something as precious and beautiful as you. Well, that was just Jungwon's opinion.

The black cat knew that you didn't live alone, and many clues told him that you were in the same situation as he was. There was a good chance that you were living at someone's expense, Jungwon was even sure of it, he had seen the same male silhouette several times when he sat in front of the balcony window late at night. With the night and the lack of light, he hadn't been able to clearly make out the person taking care of you, but from the way your bushy, radiant tail had dulled, he was sure this person was an idiot. Jay would have taken better care of you and never let you sit on the floor, even if it meant covering their whole apartment with carpet or rugs that were far too luxurious.

Pushing those ideas out of his mind, hiding those scenes he'd imagined, the ones where he'd carry you off and lock you in his room, grooming and pampering you for hours on end, he did what he did best in your presence, looking into your eyes with such admiration and purity that his owner would have been almost disgusted. A few times, you'd lift your gaze from your tail and dare to meet his eyes, but immediately your cheeks would flush and you'd decide that the sky was far too beautiful to ignore today. But a few minutes later you looked at him again, a few seconds longer, before avoiding his gaze. But Jungwon was satisfied with just those few seconds. He was sure that, in time, you'd finally be able to look him in the eye just as he looked at you, and you'd see the way he'd blink slowly, or make himself smaller, rolling onto his back, presenting you his favorite stuffed toy.

But he was already satisfied with the progress he'd made that week. For the first two days, you confined yourself to sitting on the edge of the door, making it clear that you didn't trust him. Even when you stared at a fixed point behind him, pretending to look at him so as not to appear intimidated, your face forming a pout that was meant to be frightening, Jungwon couldn't help finding you beautiful and adorable. You sat there all afternoon, staring at this fixed point. On the third day, you decided to ignore him, but this time you brought back your brush, which by the way seemed to be damaged. You didn't give him a single glance, but Jungwon was satisfied to see you sitting far enough away from the door, closer to the glass barrier that prevented you from falling into the green grass below your feet. And since then, you'd always settled into your usual place, leaning against the wall, watching the birds fly overhead or stroking your tail again, tirelessly.

It was a habit that Jungwon had initially found beautiful and cute, but now he couldn't help but feel worried. A strange feeling bubbled up inside him, his instincts screaming at him to stop your tireless gesture. After all, despite the time you spent brushing your appendage, Jungwon had noticed that it wasn't looking any better. On the contrary, the color of your tail was fading a little more every day, and so was the amount of hair. What worried him most was your left ear, which seemed to be losing a little more hair every day. The cat had noticed your annoying habit of vigorously scratching your ear when you were lost in thought, or when your ears suddenly twitched. You scratched your ears nervously before hurriedly getting up and leaving the balcony. Jungwon wouldn't see you again until the following day.

Lying on his stomach, sighing with contentment, not once taking his eyes off you, Jungwon suddenly had an idea when he saw you fidgeting on the spot, readjusting your position. He suddenly stood up, catching your eye and your curious gaze, before rushing into the apartment.

The instant he disappeared, you sat bolt upright, startled. A million thoughts raced through your mind. Had you been too hostile ? Not welcoming enough ? Hadn't you shown him that his presence soothed you ? Were you not good company ? A strangled cry akin to a distressed mewl almost escaped your throat, but you held it back, almost choking. You crawled forward, approaching the barrier, putting a hand on it, about to stand up, when he suddenly reappeared, a laptop that would surely cost Jake three rents in hand. Oh, your neighbor across the street must have had a wealthy owner. You shrank a little at the information, suddenly feeling ashamed of your financial situation. But before you could even back away from your spot by the railing, the big, almond eyes of the cat across the street turned to you and lit up like a child's eyes at Christmas.

Faintly, almost indistinctly, you heard a low growl. You flinched, preparing to be spat on for breaking an unspoken rule. But slowly and surely, your brain associated the noise with something very familiar. The same sound that emanated from your throat when Jake gave you attention. The boy across the street had come up to the glass, almost glued his face to it, and was purring. He was happy, just to see you come within a few centimeters even when you were meters away made him happy. Although Jungwon noticed immediately, his heart doing pirouettes, the biggest of smiles on his face, it had taken you ten minutes or so to understand and hear that there wasn't just a rumble in the air. Unconsciously, in response to his joy and soothing signals, you too began to purr. You hadn't purred for two days now. It felt good.

D-9

"Baby ! Did you ordered something ?"

Jake's voice snapped you out of your staring duel with Jungwon, and you pouted and scratched your ear at the satisfied, almost mocking look on the boy's face. Shyly, you gave him a little wave and a little smile, letting your tail slide along the glass plate before rising lazily from the floor. Whereas a few days before you'd jumped up to greet the Australian, this time you'd hesitated. You turned around a few times, took two steps back and then one forward, then went inside for good, closing the door behind you.

Jungwon noticed this hesitation and couldn't help smiling smugly, knowing that you'd almost rather stay with him than go back to your guardian. He'd made enormous progress of which he was not just a little proud, and so had had almost no qualms about tracing your curves with his eyes when you'd stood up. His gaze lingered on the curve of your hips. Wide hips and chunky thighs. Able to bear children, survive through pregnancy and give her a litter of kittens.

What ? What !

Jungwon's face paled and he suddenly buried his head in his cushion, muffling his cry at the desperate thought which just crossed his mind unexpectedly. He couldn't understand why he'd suddenly thought of that, he wasn't in heat and he wasn't about to have it. He felt a sudden urge to cuddle, so he went inside to pester Jay to come home.

Jake had asked the question before he'd even entered the house. As he returned from a particularly quiet day, ready to be greeted by your warm arms and soothing purrs, the young man had found a package outside the front door downstairs. Last time he checked, you and he were the only tenants in this building, which was far too shabby to have any other inhabitants, so this package could only be for you. It was a rather large box, and after checking that it wasn't a joke by looking left and right and looking at the address, which surprisingly matched his floor, Jake realized that a note had been added in the delivery instructions.

"For the cat..? What the-"

The Australian had been creeped out at first. Was someone stalking you, his sweet baby ? He had to ask you first before jumping to conclusions. So he'd gone upstairs and called you. But when he turned the doorknob and entered the apartment, he thought for a moment that his lunch was about to go down his throat. You weren't there, behind the door, waiting for him. You weren't waiting for him.

"Jakey..?" You'd asked in a way he knew wasn't a question. You knew he was there, but you hadn't waited for him. Why ?

"Baby ? Everything's all right ? Feeling good ? Not too hot ?" he said dropping the heavy box on the floor to check your temperature.

You leaned in his hand affectionately, humming. He exhaled, relieved, and fail to miss that the usual purring sound wasn't emanating from your throat. And hadn't for a few days.

"There's a box, I think it's for you. Did you ordered something ?"

Horrified, you opened your mouth and eyes wide. You couldn't afford to order something without asking Jake's advice when he was working day and night to provide for you. "No, I swear I didn't Jakey !" You clasped your hands around his, big round eyes looking at his worriedly.

"It's fine baby I'm not scolding you. Well, I think it's for you though so open it and tell me what it is, yeah ? I'll go make some ramens."

You nodded, eyeing the box more than a little warily, taking small steps towards it, nudging it with the tip of your finger before crouching down beside it and looking at it from side to side. You sat cross-legged, your tail wagging lazily behind you, before finally deciding to open it, finding a chisel lying around in the commode to cut off the large piece of scotch tape. After struggling for some minutes, you finally managed to pull out the huge, heavy piece of plastic contained in the box. Just as you were about to rip it open, a sheet of paper fell, landing only a few centimetres from you.

You tilted your head, curious, then picked up the piece of paper, seeing that it was just a blank sheet. Shrugging, you were about to throw it away, only to notice black ink on the back. Turning the paper over, you saw that a message had been typed on the computer.

'A queen-sized fluffy cushion for a glamorous princess. -Jungwon'

You'd never heard or read that name before. But you knew who had sent you the package. Your instincts were screaming it, your heart was singing it and your head was repeating it. He'd probably given you something you couldn't afford, something you and Jake could never afford, but that didn't matter to you right now. What mattered to you was that you could finally put a name to the face you saw every day. You could finally call by a first name the person who reassured and comforted you every day.

"Jungwon. Jungwon… Jungwonnie…"

"Well ? What is it ?" Jake returned to you, two bowls of noodles in hand, and set them down on the small coffee table in the living room.

In your haste, you found yourself hiding the sweet note behind you, discreetly sliding it under the sofa. Immediately, a feeling of guilt grabbed you by the throat and made you nauseous, your stomach churning at the mere idea that you'd just hidden something from your owner, from Jake, your best friend. You smiled hesitantly, wishing his fatigue would make your smile believable, before opening the large laminated package in the middle of the living room. Immediately, an atrophied cousin stretched out to its full length, swelling with every passing minute under your two startled gazes. The cushion was as fluffy as you could wish for, but above all, it was huge. Very huge.

"Wow, that's impressive." Jake said, bewildered at the mere sight. He leaned over the pillow and rested his hand on it, then his eyes opened wide at the sensation of the soft, squishy material beneath his fingers. He felt as if the pillow were enveloping his hand, beckoning him to sleep on it, or to rest on it without moving for hours. "Even though it's nice and obviously super expensive, it's not ours, we should send it back." Jake concludes with a shrug, already preparing to repack the package as best he can.

But that's without counting on your quick reflexes and 'soften Jake' skills. You threw yourself into his arms, burrowed in and affectionately rubbed your head in his neck. Your big, bright eyes looked up at him, pleading. "No ! I like it ! Can we keep it ?"

"Baby, it's not ours, someone must be looking for it…"

"It says for the cat ! Must be for me, right ?" you whined cutely, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

Jake's cheeks flushed and he felt his body and mind playing tricks on him. When did you get so cute ? When did you grow up so much ? Since when did you know how to use your charms ? "Baby, it means that some creep is looking at you." He cup your face, looking into your eyes, worried, "You'd tell me if someone was making you feel uncomfortable, right ?"

"Sure Jakey !" you purred, batting your eyelashes and smiling cutely. You innocently pressed a kiss to the corner of her lips before continuing "But I really, really like it ! Just this once ? Pretty please ?"

Jake hugged you tightly, hiding his blush in the crook of your neck, hoping you couldn't feel his heart beating faster, threatening to escape his chest. He mumbled, "Just this once…", and you squealed out of pure joy, purring loudly while throwing yourself into your new bed, rolling in it.

"I love you Baby."

"Oh this is so fun !"

Jake felt his insides twist and his eyebrows furrow. You always responded to his 'I love you's. Since you were just babies, you always responded, and sometimes you were even eager to be the first to say it. The Australian felt confused but most of all hurt, didn't you love him anymore ? Figuring you probably hadn't heard him, he repeated himself, raising his tone slightly, "Baby, I said I love you."

"Hmm ? Oh, I love you to Jake !"

Yeah, you just hadn't heard him.

D-12

"Peek-a-boo!"

Jungwon heard you giggled from across the garden and smiled, proud of himself for being able to make you laugh like that. He hid behind the glass door again, waited a moment, waiting for your breath to stop for a few seconds, as it did every time he disappeared, then emerged from behind the door with a leap, faking claws and growling playfully.

"Rawr !" you said back, imitating him, but not in a moronic or infantile way, but rather amused, perhaps even mocking. But the black cat would gladly be the target of your mockery if it meant hearing your laughter over and over again. He thought he could be satisfied with seeing you lying in that cushion he'd chosen for you, and he had been. For about five minutes. He'd seen you looking up at him with your big round eyes, then you'd blinked slowly, then stretched out full length in his present, presenting your belly to the sky and to him. Jungwon was no longer satisfied. At that moment he had decided to give you the world and more.

So, what was supposed to be just one bed, had turned into a brand new brush made from the softest, most hybrid-friendly materials, then a new range of coat care products, which you diligently applied every night so that Jungwon would see that you cherished and cared for what he was offering you, to indicate to him that you accepted his advances. And this morning you'd received a ton of clothes, luxurious brands or not, cute, black, pink, tracksuits, sweaters, skirts. But Jake hadn't seen any of it, at least not yet. You knew it annoyed him that he didn't know where all these gifts had come from, since they were obviously for you, but he was far too busy with his studies and work to investigate seriously.

All these gifts were accompanied by cute notes written on the computer or appearing on the delivery instructions. You kept them carefully between a pile of your clothes, and tried to imagine Jungwon's voice, which you'd only heard a few times before. His voice was light and comforting, like a sea breeze in midsummer, and you wished you could hear it again and again, but unfortunately you both spent your time absorbing the sun's rays or playing in silence.

'Kitten must take care of herself to be the prettiest cat. -Jungwon' 'Your tail looks ravishing, just like you... -Jungwon' 'Saw this skirt and thought aout you, you'll be the prettiest kitten in it ! -Jungwon'

It was feeding your ego, making you feel better about yourself. And spending days just lying in the sun, knowing that Jungwon was right next door, was probably the most relaxing part of your daily routine. And yet, a hollow in your heart seemed to grow with each passing day. Your heart had room for many, of course, but that also meant that Jungwon was no substitute for Jake. And every day he neglected you was a day your mood worsened. He'd probably noticed that you'd stopped coming to say hello and just waited for him in the living room, that you smiled without any real zest when he stroked your ears. Although, on Jake's part, maybe he hadn't noticed any of that.

"Oh, hi ?"

A very familiar voice startled you and you turned at full speed towards the balcony doors, Jake's silhouette awkwardly holding onto them, trying not to step on your bed. He wasn't looking at you, he was looking at the cat in front of him, he was looking at Jungwon. And Jungwon was looking at him. Just when he thought he'd be angry and probably hiss at your owner, Jungwon surprised himself by saying nothing. He simply tilted his head left and right, examining the newcomer up and down.

"Thought I heard you laugh so I came here to check because I don't know what happened to our living room. But I think-" he looked at your big round and surprised eyes and then at the black cat in front of you, then his gaze fell on the same cushion you had, and he had a revelation. "I think I know who your secret admirer is, now…"

Jake nervously ran his fingers through his hair, not even sure why he was nervous, then sighed heavily. "Hum, excuse me, are you the one sending us all those stuffs..?"

Silence answered him and your gaze kept alternating between Jungwon and Jake, both silently looking into each other's eyes before Jake let out an embarrassed laugh. Jungwon didn't really know what to say: should he tell him the truth ? Lie ? He felt a little intimidated too, the man beside you was so handsome, with a pretty nose, high palmettes and a sharp jaw. But he didn't want you to get into trouble so he nodded silently, cautiously, tail wagging rapidly behind him, anticipating what was going to happen next.

"Okay~…" Jake nodded, dragging the 'o'. He recognized some of those quirks and habits the black cat had that you had yourself. And from the comfort in which he himself was ensconced, he was probably an indoor cat, like you. "You're kinda cute y'know ?" Jake said as a matter of fact, nodding to himself.

Well, Jungwon wasn't expecting that. He hid his blushing cheeks behind his much too large sleeves, annoyed at the male laughter that escaped from your owner. It was cute, Jungwon shouldn't find it cute.

"I'm Jake by the way. Bold of me to assume this but…can I talk to your- hum…caretaker? Don't wanna sound rude."

Jungwon contemplated his options. He could lie and play the card of the independent hybrid deeply revolted by his words just so he could blow him off. Or, he could get into your owner's good graces so he could woo you without fear of him interfering. Both options seemed equally tempting. Finally, he opened his mouth, speaking just loud enough for you to hear. "He's not here, he's working."

"Do you know when he'll come back?"

"In an hour or so."

"Okay, see ya then." Jake nodded, patting your head to gain back your attention. It was painful watching you gawk at the boy in front of both of you like this, with so much care and adoration. Now that he saw you looking at someone else in this way, Jake realized that it had been a few days since he'd seen that look in your eyes when he came home. Was the cat the reason ? An ugly and unfamiliar green feeling crept up his throat and choked him, leaving a bitter aftertaste in his mouth at the sudden realization that you no longer found interest in him since you'd found another playmate. "Come on Baby let's go home."

Jungwon's ears perked up even more at the nickname Jake had for you. Oh, he knew you were kind and sweet, but hearing Jake call you that only confirmed his certainty. Even though he'd abandoned you for days, you still tolerated him calling you by that affectionate nickname. You were adorable. Jay, for less, would already have had to redo his dressing room because of his anger.

But you ? You were so nice and pliant. So 'Baby' material. Jungwon was sure you would be too, behind closed doors. That you'd bend over for him, call him and meow his name like a cat in heat, waiting for him to take care of you and fill you with his kittens. He knew you'd take whatever he gave you without ever complaining, wherever he wanted, whenever he wanted, let it be in the shower or in the kitchen. He knew you'd let him fuck you in your new bed so both your smells would soak up and mingle, that you'd let him cover you and spread his cum all over your body so everyone would know you belonged to him. And that then you'd lick his dick clean with both your cum before pushing your hips towards his again, demanding more, always more, whining and whimpering to be filled with something, anything. Yeah you were a Baby, but above all you were his Kitten, his breedable Kitten. You would carry his kittens so well.

"Hi ?"

"Hi ! I'm sorry I know it's late but I really really need to talk to you. Can you get down ?" Jake asked awkwardly and hurriedly. A morbid silence answered him and he facepalmed, electing that he'd forgotten the most important piece of information. "I'm your not so new neighbor by the way."

"…I'm coming."

Jake waited a few moments outside the building similar to his own, enjoying the welcome coolness of a spring's night, when suddenly the front door opened, the sound of flip-flops reaching his ears, making him turn around.

"Oh bro you're handsome !" Jake gasped, one hand in front of his mouth, looking his neighbor up and down. He wasn't much more dressed up than that, just a gray T-shirt and black shorts, with Nike flip-flops. And yet, his fine features and discreet but prominent muscles were enough to make Jake think that his profession was modeling.

The latter arched an eyebrow, not in the least impressed, as if he received this compliment every day, and waited patiently for the young man in front of him to recover from his emotions.

"Oh yeah, sorry, I'm Jake." Jake said, extending his hand toward the boy in front of him, who gave it a firm, deft shake.

"You have a bit of an accent ?" Jay asked, recognizing an accent he couldn't put a name to. He wasn't used to running into people who spoke English this well in South Korea outside of the workplace.

"Oh I'm Australian, moved here and here in Korea, and then-" he pointed to the apartment parallel to his own, "here. Been a while actually, but I didn't know I had neighbors until, well, two hours ago."

"Yeah sorry. Should have introduced ourselves properly but no one told me new people would move in. Are you with your girlfriend ? Or boyfriend, not judging or something. Or single ?"

Jake tilted his head, confused by the sudden question, but still kept a friendly smile and replied, "No, she's my- wait it feels weird to say it like that but I can't find a better explanation at the moment. I'm with my cat hybrid."

"You have a cat hybrid ?" Jay's hitherto almost bored gaze seemed to light up a little, genuinely interested in this new information. "Me too." he smiled, thinking about what Jungwon could be doing at the moment.

"Well, I kinda know. Thought you knew that there was a cat in front of your house too…?" Jake said almost hesitantly, gauging his reaction before dropping the bomb. Clearly he didn't seem to know what was going on between their two cats. "That's why I'm here actually…"

"What ? Did something happened ? This brat spend half his day on the balcony and the other half in my arms, surprisingly. He can be a bit rude at times, did he offended her ?"

"Oh no he's a sweetheart ! It's just that- Hum, your cat is-" Jake stuttered, biting his lower lips in order to hide his embarrassment. What he was about to say was weird, he knew it. And he hated the fact that it was their first time meeting each other, it somehow made it worse. "Well, he's showering mine in gifts. Clothes, selfcare products, books..."

"He's what now ?"

"He's treating my girl. Thought it was some random fan who thought that she was pretty, but turned out your cat was the fan."

"Oh." Jay honestly didn't know what to say. He felt embarrassed, his face had paled even though he was still cool and composed. His cat was spending lavishly on the new neighbor's cat. The American had expected a lot, but certainly not this.

"Don't get me wrong, it's not a problem. I mean, for us, don't know about you. Or it wasn't. Because he shopped some pretty good clothes actually, for my girl, and she's overjoyed and all ! But our apartment is way too small and I can barely step in the living room without walking on a new book or a new package. I'm sorry, you'll have to tell him to stop sending those, otherwise we'll have to donate them."

"Oh gosh this is so embarrassing."

"Nah bro we good don't worry, my cat is pretty shy and all, she never talk to anyone, but I think she's really good friend with yours. It was pretty cute honestly."

"Is she ? That's sweet then. But I'm still sorry, I'll go and talk some sense into him."

"Okay. Well, have a good night, sorry that we have to met like that."

"Me too."

Jay stood in the same spot, pondering his life choices. You definitely had to have something to do with Jungwon's sudden change in behavior, and you had to be as sweet as Jake claimed if Jungwon had stopped breaking his glasses overnight. Now he was curious. Watching Jake's silhouette as he prepared to disappear into the shabby building that served as an apartment complex, Jay made up his mind and ran after him, holding the door behind the Australian.

"Sorry ! I'm Jay, came from America."

Jake turned and smiled brilliantly at the boy in front of him, greeting him with an awkward wave of the hand, clearly pleased with the initiative Jay had taken.

"Can we exchange phone numbers ?"

"Yeah, sure Jay."

"Who are you texting ? And why are you giving me the cold shoulder ?" Jungwon whined, wiggling on the couch to be closer to his owner.

Jay hummed and suddenly laughed, as if what he'd just seen was the funniest thing ever. Jungwon frowned, annoyed at being ignored. Two weeks earlier he wouldn't have cared, but now he felt an urge to knock the glass off the table to get the American's attention.

"Jay~!"

Jay sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, seemingly annoyed at his cat's antics. "I'm texting our neighbor."

The cat's ears perked up at the mention of the apartment opposite theirs, curious as to how and why Jay had decided to keep talking to your owner. It wasn't in his nature to want to make friends with people. He wasn't an introvert, but he didn't like being around a lot of people either. "The one from the apartment in front of ours ?"

"Well, he's the only neighbor we have." Jay answered, rolling his eyes. He knew he was being petty but he couldn't help it after the stunt Jungwon pulled. "Actually, let's talk about them." Jay frowned and put his phone down on the coffee table, resting his chin on his joined hands, looking at the younger man with a sharp gaze. The latter looked at him, round-eyed, confused and alarmed at his friend's sudden change of attitude, and fidgeted awkwardly in place, his tail wagging nervously at his side. "When were you planning to tell me about those…presents ? Or about the cat across the garden."

"Oh."

"Oh, in fact. Jake told me that their apartment is full of presents, they can barely walk in there."

"I was just taking care of her ! She seemed really uncomfortable and annoyed in there."

"Jungwon, she has an owner ! Don't you understand ? It's not our job to take care of her needs !"

"Now you're being selfish." Jungwon scoffed, rolling his eyes and getting up from the couch, ready to ignore what Jay had to say.

"Oh no I'm not done wit you-" Jay stood up in turn and decided to follow him around the apartment. "I don't give a fuck about you spending my money or whatever. I care that you did not said a single thing to me or her owner !"

"Blah, blah, blah!" Jungwon shook his head, making it clear to Jay that he wasn't listening or caring about what Jay had to say.

Jay clenched his fists and took deep breaths to calm the anger boiling inside him. He didn't want to say something he'd regret later and risk betraying the trust his mischevious cat had in him. So he decided that leaving to think things over was the best thing to do. "Oh wanna act like a child ? I'll treat you like one then."

Jungwon turned abruptly, a plea on the tip of his lips as he watched the American leave, but his ego got the better of him. He exhaled heavily and went off to perch on his mezzanine, trying to get some sleep.

D-13

The next day, when you woke up groggy, an unbearable headache made it hard to breathe without feeling a burning in your nostrils. The lights seemed too bright even though Jake had taken care to keep the curtains closed, and your senses were in overdrive. Especially your sense of smell, which, between Jake's scent and yours around you, managed to discern another odor. Acrid and bitter, unpleasant and almost suffocating despite the little you inhaled. But above all, a familiar smell. One you'd learned to recognize with your eyes closed, that of Jungwon. Except now it was laced with notes of anger and pain, and it made you want to jump over the balcony to go find him and make him feel better. It didn't matter how.

You stood up and quickly washed your face, then quickly headed for the French window without even eating. You couldn't wait to see him sitting on the other side, so maybe you could comfort him ? But the sight that greeted you left you perplexed, but above all hurt, sad and alone. Opposite you, the cushion on which Jungwon used to rest and nap was missing. Only the cold concrete graced you from its sight, as well as that of the white electric shutter, closed completely. Maybe it was too early. Maybe he was just having a bad dream. But all the same, the sight of his missing pillow gave you a feeling of anxiety that almost made you nauseous.

You fetched your alarm clock and set it down in front of you, sat cross-legged and waited patiently for Jungwon to open the glass doors and greet you with a smile, tired perhaps, but a smile all the same. But it didn't happen. As you stood motionless, staring at the doors, hoping to see the person you were waiting for, the world around you continued to turn. Gradually, the refreshing breeze had turned to stifling heat as the sun continued to race across the sky. 9:30 a.m. soon became 11:30 a.m. , and then 1:30 p.m. , and then 3:30 p.m. . The sun was at its peak and your lips were beginning to chafe from lack of hydration. A dull ache in your head made your eyes heavy, but you managed to keep awake by clumsily scratching your right ear, ignoring the sensation of warm liquid running down them as you scratched for what felt like the fiftieth time that day. In the meantime, you'd spent the whole day tirelessly brushing your tail, ignoring the clumps of hair accumulating at your feet.

As your eyelids grew heavy, a piercing pain running up and down your head, a sudden movement opposite caught your attention. You winced at the sensation of your right ear twitching, but your eyes didn't move once from the repetitive movement opposite. In fact, it wasn't a movement, just a noise. Since this morning you'd been hearing faint sounds from the other side, too well muffled by the glass for you to make out, but this one was loud. Louder and louder, in fact. As if someone were banging on glass, over and over again. A high-pitched screeching noise made your eye twitch, but you leaned forward anyway, hopeful. You were sure it was Jungwon.

"Jung-…" you murmured softly, your voice cracking from lack of hydration and speech - you'd been mute for a whole day after all, hadn't uttered so much as a sound. Saying that syllable felt like a mouse had lodged itself in your throat and was trying to claw its way out. It was a dull, burning pain, heightened by the feeling of discomfort you'd been feeling for an hour now. And yet, you did your best to pronounce his name.

"Jung- Jung...won..."

It was the first time you'd ever called him. You wished it had been under different circumstances, but every time the opportunity arose and he stood in front of you, that word stuck in the hollow of your throat and your face flushed as if someone had whispered the worst obscenities to you. But this time it was different. Even though, as before, you felt the word was stuck in the back of your throat, you forced yourself to get it out. It was just a sound, two syllables, a pathetic whimper, but it was enough to make the drumming in front of you intensify.

"Jungwon..?"

"Jungwon ?"

"Jungwon !"

You'd spent the afternoon meowing his name, but never got an answer. You leaned over the balcony, almost fell over, but never stopped calling his name over and over again. At some point, you lost consciousness and your fragile figure sprawled out in your cushion, your eyelids half-open, murmuring the name of the boy across the garden.

It was 6 p.m. and Jay had barely parked his car in front of his apartment when a bad feeling already gripped his gut. In fact, he could only have had a bad feeling when he saw his belongings spread out on the dirty street floor, the window of his apartment wide open. Furious, he climbed the stairs four at a time, eager to give a piece of his mind to Jungwon.

Jay slowly opened the door to his apartment and a scene of war unfolded before his eyes. Slowly, he entered his apartment and his eye twitched at the sound of shattering glass beneath his feet. Lowering his gaze, he found the equivalent of his entire dinner service on his floor, shattered into thousands of pieces, scattered all over his apartment. Moving on, he found his sofa ripped open, his pillows torn to shreds, his curtains slashed and his chairs overturned. Whereas he'd been angry, now he felt more worried than anything else. Sure, Jungwon would break a glass or two when he was upset, but he'd never turned his apartment upside down like that, let alone thrown his stuff out of the window.

Walking briskly to his cat's room, he wasn't surprised to find him snuggled up in his fur comforter on top of the mezzanine, his back to the door. Hesitantly, he entered the room, but stopped short at the sound that greeted him as soon as he stepped inside. Jungwon was growling. His cat was growling at him. It was the first time this had ever happened and it was frightening. Not because he was afraid of what Jungwon might do to him, but rather because he was afraid their relationship was reaching a point of no return.

The American took small steps backwards, gently so as not to upset his friend, any thoughts of scolding him gone with the sigh he'd let escape once out of the room.

"Oh gosh…" he sighed, massaging his temples before grabbing his phone, making a call.

As he slumped into what was left of his couch, completely overwhelmed by the events, his attention was drawn to a strange and albeit slightly horrifying sight.

"Clinique Inter-species hello ! How can I help you ?"

Jay didn't even notice the other voice on the other end of the line and stood up cautiously, approaching the crime scene. Then, in a flash, everything connected in his head. The way Jungwon had acted today. it was all his fault, he'd reacted badly to the news yesterday and made an impulsive decision that put you all in a difficult situation.

"Hello ?"

"Yes ! Good evening, excuse me, I'd like to make an appointment as soon as possible for a cat hybrid please."

"Ah… I'm afraid you won't have an appointment for another week. Could I have your name and the name of the hybrid ?"

"Park Jongseong, the hybrid's name is Yang Jungwon."

"Oh Mister Park ! We have room tomorrow morning if you want it ?"

"Thank you. Have a nice day."

Jay didn't wait for the hostess's reply before hanging up, a grimace on his face at the way she'd completely changed her attitude at the mention of his first name. Money could work miracles. But he couldn't dwell on that insignificant detail. Not when the French window leading to the balcony had multiple cracks in it, one of his gold trophies laying next to it on the ground. Everything made sense now.

You felt yourself being shaken back and forth before a strange sensation made you feel as if you were floating. Your limbs and tail dangled lethargically, and you were now sure that someone was carrying you. Far too woozy to open your eyes, you still felt your eyelids twitch at the bright light that seemed to be right in front of you. You wished you could curl up in a ball in the sheets beneath you to hide and mope in silence, but even lifting a finger seemed too much effort.

Soon enough, your senses awoke to the sound of hurried footsteps left and right, then a cool sensation on your forehead made you sigh with contentment. Delicately, you felt a cold cloth drape over your face, bringing a welcome coolness, and you couldn't help but lean into the sensation, a frown still on your face.

"Come on, I know you're there, wake up !"

You blinked once, twice, weakly before finally opening your eyes once your vision adjusted to your surroundings. Above you, Jake's terrified face greeted you and you couldn't help but let out a confused squeak. Why did he look so worried ?

His arms engulfed you and you inhaled deeply, your nose curling up at the pungent scent Jake's distress was emitting. But you didn't have the heart to push him away after seeing his eyes glistening with tears. He may never have been around, but you loved him all the same. He was your Jake.

"What's happening Jake ?" you voice came out horse and you coughed, gulping your saliva in order to quench your thirst.

Delicately, the Australian put you in a sitting position and rushed into the kitchen to bring you a large bottle of water. He sat down beside you on your bed and, having opened the bottle, brought it to your lips with one hand, the other resting behind your neck, supporting your head.

"Drink."

You could have protested and sulked, but Jake's tone, one you'd never heard before - demanding and commanding, left you no choice but to tentatively open your lips, watching him out of the corner of your eye as he helped you drink. You'd needed to get sick and dehydrated to realize that your best friend was handsome. From the features of his face to the way he frowned, or his long, thin, veined fingers, he truly was a work of art despite being a broke and single student.

Your cheeks reddened at these thoughts and you couldn't help wanting to pull your head away from his grip, whimpering like a child for him to let you go. But Jake was having none of it, "Drink or I'll force you."

Pouting, you gulped the water that flowed into your mouth, an adorable pout on your face that made a smile escape Jake despite his concern, "There you go, that's my good girl."

You almost spat all the water in your mouth or choked with it, ears folded over your skull as you did whenever you felt particularly shy or embarrassed. This caught Jake's attention and he couldn't help but open his mouth wide, horrified at the sight of the red wound on your right ear, the bloody scratch marks, the bare, red, irritated skin. Yet you seemed oblivious to what had happened to you as you simply stared at him from behind your sleeves, eyes squinting and cheeks flushed.

"What..?"

"Nothing ! You should go to sleep, rest, we'll talk about this tomorrow."

"I don't want to talk about it…" you said like a grumpy cat, laying and showing your back to your friend.

He poked your ribs, making you stifle a laugh, before saying playfully, "Now you're just being bratty. Aren't you my good girl anymore ?"

There was a pregnant silence and Jake wondered if he'd gone too far in his teasing. Maybe you were really angry with him ? Maybe he'd done something to make you feel uncomfortable ? But that thought vanished the instant you turned, sheepishly, and nestled your face in his belly, whispering, "'M still your good girl…"

"I know baby, I love you."

"..."

"I said I love you."

"I know."

Later that night, Jake felt too anxious to sleep. He was trying to figure out when events had taken such a turn, how and why you'd gotten to the point where you'd only said 'I know' when he'd told you he loved you. He'd even let a few tears escape as he disinfected your wound, aware that this first-aid kit was the only thing he could provide when it came to care. He'd let a few tears escape because he knew that your financial situation wouldn't allow him to take you to the doctor. He had replayed the events of the last few weeks in his head and suddenly everything seemed to make a lot more sense. He'd needed you to get sick for him to realize how much he'd neglected you. He was ashamed of himself and of what lack of money had made him. He'd rather eat bread all through college than have to leave you so alone again.

Resolving to quit one of his part-time jobs, he still went to a forum that had advised him many times in the past, hoping that this time again these people could help him.

'Hi everyone. I'm having some problems with my cat hybrid. We've been living together for years now and she's very sweet and affectionate. Recently I've had to work twice as hard to support us so I've not been around too much. I honestly thought that was why she had become so distant. In fact, for several days now, she's been meeting a hybrid cat on the balcony. I think they spend hours there doing and saying who knows what to each other. Recently, I learned that he was the source of many of the gifts we received at home. I wondered if her behavior had anything to do with this boy ?'

He didn't have to wait long for many people to reply, as it turned out that some answers were more useful than others. Some couldn't help but gush over how it was 'cute' while some extremists criticized Jake for being your owner, saying that hybrids had as many rights as humans. But when people actually came up with an answer to his question, it always turned out to be the same one. One that made the Australian's blood boil as it scrolled before his eyes again and again-

D-14

"He's in love."

"Pardon ?"

Jay had no experience or knowledge of hybrids. In fact, he only knew what he needed to know to take care of Jungwon. And even then, he knew what he needed to know to take care of Jungwon's specific needs. And yet, he couldn't help but doubt the doctor's verdict. The verdict from someone who'd studied for years, who'd devoted part of his life to studying hybrids of every size, of every species. Was her cat in love ?

"He's in love, it's as simple as that." the doctor said in a tone of finality, perfectly sure of himself, closing the file dedicated to Jungwon once he'd finished jotting down his diagnosis. Stirring the pot, he continued, smiling, "In fact, I don't think I even need to be a doctor to say that. It's pretty obvious from what you're telling me."

"No but- He-…"

"He can fall in love too, you know ?" The doctor said in a soft voice, a smile that was meant to be comforting on his face. "I know it must feel weird, you've grown up with him and- well, I won't make any assumptions or judgments about the nature of your relationship, but it must feel weird to realize that your little hybrid has grown up and detached himself from you to the point of falling in love with another person, right ?"

Jay remained silent. He didn't think the diagnosis would affect him so much. Nor that the idea of Jungwon in love with someone would give him that feeling, the feeling of being helpless, devoid of words or control over the situation. Then again, he kind of doubted it. No, he knew it. But he didn't want to admit that his little cat had grown so much.

"I suggest you organize a meet up between him and her. Honestly, I can't help feeling concerned about this cat's health. What happened yesterday must have taken a tole on her too. Each person reacts differently."

"So that's it ? The prescription is a meet up between them ?"

"I could tell you the things you want to hear, that it's only temporary, giving you happy pills and suggesting you to prevent him from seeing that girl so you can pretend everything's fine. But here we're acting in the interests of the hybrids and, rarely when the situation arises, their eventual owner. I know you both well enough to know that's not what you want, isn't it Mr.Park ?"

"Right. I'm sorry. Thank you doc."

Jay bowed to the doctor, thanking him again. A silent thank you for helping him think more clearly. He knew he was being selfish, and perhaps if it had been any other doctor who simply gave his client what they wanted, this situation would have ended badly for everyone. Sighing, he headed for the door, accompanied by Jungwon's attending physician, who opened the door for him and shook his hand firmly, wishing him not to see him again any time soon.

Jay looked up from the floor and was greeted by the piercing, grumpy gaze of his cat, causing him to roll his eyes. He was immune to that gaze, but that didn't stop Jungwon from continuing to look at him that way.

"Bye Jungwon ! Can't wait to hear more about her !"

Jungwon bowed in the direction of the man in the white coat, ignoring the burning sensation at the tip of his ears. He turned quickly and left the corridor with a mechanical, embarrassed gait, causing the doctor to laugh and call his next patient.

Jay didn't arrive at the car until a few minutes after Jungwon, sighing as he slumped into the driver's seat. The silence in the car was heavy, Jungwon looking out over the parking lot, brows furrowed and eyes squinting, as Jay recalled his discussion with the doctor. A meet up. He had to organize a meet up. And as fate would have it. As he reached for his phone to send Jake a message, his screen lit up on its own, displaying the Australian's contact alongside a short message.

'Hey hope I'm not disturbing you ?' -Jake 'No, I was about to send you a message' -Jay 'Oh lol' -Jake 'Was thinking' -Jake 'Maybe we could make them meet ?' -Jake

Jay held back his laughter, trying not to attract his cat's sullen mood. Fate really did have a way of doing things.

'Loool, came back from the doc and he said Jungwon needed to meet your girl, was about to text you.' -Jay 'Why were you at the doc ? Is he fine ? 😧' -Jake

'Yeah don't worry.' -Jay 'I was concerned about his behavior, he broke everything in my apartment and tried to break the balcony's window.' -Jay 'Damn 🫢' -Jake 'Ikr' -Jay 'Turns out he was mad because he couldn't see his little girl friend aka your hybrid.' -Jay 'He must really like her lol' -Jake 'Doc said he's in love.' -Jay 'Damn' -Jake 'It's cute 🥰' -Jake

'Hmm' -Jay 'You think you can be in the garden by the time we come back home ?' -Jay 'Wait' -Jake 'We're allowed in there ?!' -Jake 'Didn't you read the lease ?' -Jay 'I did' -Jake 'Not 🫥' -Jake 'Well, now you know.' -Jay 'You can enter through the little wooden gate, it's always open.' -Jay 'On it bro 🫡 ' -Jake 'Thanks bro' -Jay

"What are we waiting for?" Jungwon huffed, eyeing Jay up and down, frowning at the sight of his friend smiling at his phone.

Jay turned and put his phone down beside him, shaking his head before putting on his seatbelt and starting the car. He knew he was being petty by not answering Jungwon, but he couldn't help thinking back to the damage the cat had done to his apartment and having a bitter aftertaste in his mouth. He wouldn't try to ease the tension, even if the journey to their apartment was long. In fact, it was a good thirty-minute drive from the city center, as the two neighboring buildings stuck out like a sore thumb in the countryside around Seoul. No neighbors around, just the two of them. Well, just the four of you now.

"Come on Baby, we'll go out and breath some fresh air." Jake said as he lay down next to you, huffing at the feel and comfort of his bed. If he could, he would have used his weekend to lounge around his apartment, carrying you like a baby koala wherever he went, playing with you and kissing your face. But your condition was worrying, and although he had no desire to, he knew that the only cure for your malaise might well be the cat across the garden. He was jealous, it's true. To the point of tucking your tiny figure under one of his oversized sweaters and repeating dozens of times that he loved you between two smoochies on the cheeks. But he always wanted what was best for you.

"Where are we going..?" you asked, yawning like the tired kitty that you were. You felt the urge to just lay on the balcony and sunbath while waiting for Jungwon to come out. It'd been two days since you'd seen him, and you felt as if with every passing minute a gaping hole in your stomach was getting bigger and bigger. You felt empty. So you didn't even know what state you'd be in if Jake wasn't by your side.

"The garden." Jake said, beaming as he took a cap, putting it on his head before turning right and left, looking for his keys.

"The one under the balcony ?" It had caught your eye. That famous garden that separated you from Jungwon had always caught your eye. The grass was just the right height for you to feel like rolling around and lying in it for hours, and pretty flowers lined the poor, dull, moth-eaten wooden fence that connected the two buildings. You didn't know you were allowed to go there.

"Yup." he nodded, patting the pockets of his jacket, still looking for his keys, growing more frustrated with each passing second. "Have you seen my keys ?"

You looked up from the shoes you were putting on and scanned the room, searching your memory to see where he'd lost his keyring. Again. "In the trophy."

He tilted his head, confused as to why he would have put them there but went anyway, trusting your memory. Again. A big smile stretched his lips as he found his keyring and came over to kiss your forehead, hugging you. He loved being extra clingy with you. "Thank you Baby. What would I do without you ?" And the thought crossed his mind. What would he do without you ? Where would he be ? He remembered that there had been times in his life, hard, testing and challenging, when your cute face and comforting cuddles had gotten him out of a lot of trouble. He was the caring, respectful person he is today, partly thanks to you. So what would he do if you decided to be independent and leave him for someone else ? For that cat ?

"Jake?"

He didn't want to overthink it, but the simple fact that you no longer cuddled him before bed, that you no longer wanted to play with him, that you no longer said I love you to him, and especially that you no longer called him by that nickname you'd first called him with when you were still just kids made him feel abandoned. But he knew he was only reaping what he had sown. He'd abandoned and neglected you, you had every right to do so too.

"Jake, should we head outside?"

And yet you never raised your voice at him, never cried your woes to anyone who would listen, and you were patient, oh so patient even though sometimes Jake lost patience with himself. You were sweet, adorable, innocent. So corruptible that he wanted to tuck you under his arms and protect you from the world. But you were a woman, not the baby he cradled in his arms anymore.

"Yeah, let's go."

You went down the stairs and out through the front door, since the only way into the garden was through the gate onto the main street. Well, rather than a street, it was the only road leading to your poor apartment complex. As you walked at your own pace, Jake kept the conversation going. Finally, it wasn't long before you arrived in front of the verdant garden. The door was already open, the latch rusted to the point of falling off when Jake pushed open the little door.

"Nice ! It's actually quite pretty." Jake said as he took the first step, smiling brightly as his gaze fell on every little thing that stood out in the garden, especially the pretty weeping willow that stood between the two buildings, at the other end of the entrance, close to the fence that overlooked a huge field and a forest not far away. It was charming. As he was about to go and explore the garden, he felt your small hand grip his, lacing your fingers. He turned around big rond and heart shaped eyes, and felt his heart filling up with joy and love at your cuteness overload. You were looking at him with your doe eyes, wiggling, one of your hand playing with the hem of the sweater that Jake gave you as your cheeks were reddening because of embarrassment.

"I wanna explore with you..." you pout, getting closer to him and hugging his arm.

That one sentence was enough to make all the negative thoughts lingering in his mind go away and make his heart leap out of his chest. Even after everything that had happened, he was reassured to know that he was still the person you turned to when you were looking for a feeling of security. He was happy and glad to be your safe place and hoped to remain so for as long as you wanted.

"Of course Baby let's go, I'll follow you wherever you wanna go."

So you began your little tour, gently pulling Jake by the hand so he'd follow close behind. You hadn't been out for three weeks because you didn't feel like it, but the sensation of the grass tickling your calves gave you a serotonin boost. Your heart filled with joy at the sight of life around you, insects flying and birds singing. You couldn't help but crouch down to look at the flowers every time you passed a pretty bush. There were flowers of every color and kind, and you were surprised to see that they were so pretty and, above all, in such good condition, since it had been days since it had rained and the sun had been beating down hard. Normally, they would have dried out. But they were strong and radiant.

Jake held back a laugh and quickly grabbed his phone, taking a picture of you encouraging flowers without context. He knew you loved flowers, and you were taking particularly good care of a drooping plant he'd given you a few months ago. It had grown surprisingly well, perhaps because you said good morning to it every morning and good night every evening, under his amused gaze.

Humming, you continued on your way, soon losing yourself under the mass of Weeping Willow vines, taking Jake with you. You felt as if you'd arrived in a new world. The tree was so imposing that the shade it provided beneath it had managed to keep a certain coolness in the hollows of its branches. The branches weren't very high, either. In fact, you could easily climb them with a minimum of effort. Which you wouldn't do, because you weren't keen on soiling your clothes in order to get a better perch. Your balcony was good enough.

"Oh, it's really cool here. I can picture two chairs just right here." Jake said excitedly, pointing at a random place near the trunk. "Sipping lemonade and enjoying the weather-" He then kissed your knuckles then your cheek, grinning, "-and your company."

You fought the blush that crept up your neck, deciding to ignore him and his feeble protest. But suddenly, a noise caught your attention. A creak you'd heard a few minutes before. Then the sound of footsteps muffled by the greenery. You immediately hid behind Jake, relying on his broad shoulders to protect you from whoever was coming in here even though you were literally in the middle of nowhere. Normally, you'd have been able to discern a scent, telling you at least the nature of the person in front of you, but the smell of the flowers was far too stifling.

Jake, on the other hand, didn't seem surprised at all. Even though you couldn't see him, you were sure that a huge smile was gracing his face as warmth and joy emanated from his body in waves, reassuring and comforting. If Jake wasn't worried, you wouldn't be either; you trusted him with your eyes closed.

"Hey bro !"

Still confused, you followed Jake out of the shadows, the world lighting up once more as the sunlight made you squint.

"Hey, sorry we're a bit late." an unfamiliar voice said, deep and almost professional. You now knew it was a man. Probably one of Jake's friends.

"It's fine ! She wanted to explore anyway. Come say hi Baby."

Eyes round as two marbles, you looked up from his back to his head and saw him smiling brilliantly at you, silently encouraging you to take a step forward by moving slightly to the side. You hesitated a little, but took your courage in both hands and stepped forward, remaining at your owner's side.

"Hi..."

You hadn't once looked up from the ground and weren't even sure he'd heard you, your voice was so small. But you didn't miss the way he cooed before trying to hide his chuckle between two coughs.

"Told you she's shy." Jake giggled, hugging you from behind ans resting his head on your shoulder before kissing your cheek and whispering softly "You did great Baby, I'm so proud of you."

You loved it when Jake praised you. Especially after those two grueling weeks when you'd barely been around each other. You felt the impact of his words on you was multiplied by a hundred. Your brain was mushy and fuzzy and butterflies were fluttering in your stomach. You couldn't help the sidelong glance you gave him, your eyes filled with love and respect.

But suddenly, a loud noise caught your attention. A sharp exhalation and a deep inhalation, a low rambling and a soft purring. As if in slow motion, you turned your gaze to the man who had entered the garden but, to your surprise, two people were standing in front of you. The one furthest forward stood out for his height, yet he might as well not have been there, for you didn't even spare him a glance. No, your gaze was fixed on the person behind him. Your gaze flew over the boy's raven locks and pointed ears, gliding down his face, stopping on his beautiful almond-shaped eyes, his pretty pointed nose and prominent cheekbones, before continuing its descent down his torso and stopping on his tail, just as black as his hair, watching the lazy movements it made, swaying left and right.

"Hmm, well... Surprise ?"

You gasp and challenge yourself from Jake's embrace so you can hide behind him, your eyes protruding over the Australian's shoulder, fixed on the slim silhouette of the cat in front of you. But you weren't afraid. Oh no. You felt a shiver of excitement run through you and you felt so joyful that you were convinced that the adrenalin coursing through your body would enable you to run a marathon. With flushed cheeks and blown pupils, you watched as he suddenly froze, surely trying not to make any sudden movements. The silence was heavy, no one daring to speak, not even Jake or Jay, who were busy looking at the cat in front of them. In fact, Jake was strongly restraining himself from pouncing on the smaller boy, engulfing him in his arms and stroking his tail. He was a cuddle bug, that's where you got your clinginess from.

Then, as if nothing had happened, Jungwon headed for the Weeping Willow, walking past you both while your gaze never wavered from him even for a second. He had completely ignored you, spreading the branches so that he could hide among the tree's foliage, far from your three inquisitive and curious gazes. And now mouths agape. Well, Jake and Jay were the only ones who were stunned. He didn't want to put pressure on you and give you time, even though he was eager to approach you. You could tell by the way his pupils were completely dilated as he walked past you, discreetly sniffing your scent, fingers twitching with irrepressible desire.

"This brat-"

"-It's fine don't worry ! She'll come to him whenever she's ready. Should we sit and talk ?" Jake prompted, a sweatdrop on his forehead. He could tell where Jungwon got his character from. At least the little he'd seen of it. Sighing, Jay nodded and followed you as your friend guided you to a remote corner from the tree, having to gently pull you by the hand to get you to move from your spot.

Jungwon had been patiently waiting for at least an hour. He was convinced he'd done the right thing. He didn't want to corner you and wanted you to feel at ease. Surprisingly, this situation left him with a feeling of déjà vu. Like that first time he'd seen you, sitting on the balcony, letting the world enjoy your beauty, gracing him with your sight, even from a distance. You'd gone off to hide like a frightened kitten and never stopped looking at him from behind the wall like a curious kitten. Just like today. Then he'd have to clench his fists and teeth to stop himself from pouncing on you and covering you with his scent, from squeezing you and purring in the hollow of your ears and telling you how cute and pretty you were, how he couldn't wait to be able to touch you. Everywhere.

A sudden movement caught his attention and he fought the urge to sit straight. He couldn't see you, but he knew it was you. That any moment now your adorable face would emerge from between the leaves. So he closed his eyes and waited patiently. He didn't see you, but he heard your breathing grow short, heard the sound of your hands and knees on the cool grass as you slowly approached him. You took one more step every two minutes, and soon enough Jungwon felt you beside him. So close. Your scent filled his senses and you were all he could think about. You, pretty you, darling and cutie you. The only distraction in his world.

"They left- Wanted to eat-"

The information registered briefly in his skull. He vaguely remembered hearing the sound of an engine. But the only thing he wanted to hear was your voice. Sweet voice. Soft voice, whispering and stuttering.

Honestly, if asked, Jungwon would say he didn't know what had come over him. Because from one minute to the next, he'd jerked upright, causing you to squeal and fall backwards. You turned and tried to run away, but a firm grip on your pretty tail prevented you from taking another step away from him. You turned, lips curled as you did your best to hiss at the other cat. But he was having none of it.

As soon as the sound left your mouth, he bent you over, him on top of you, and bit the back of your neck, sinking his little fangs into your flesh as he pushed his pelvis into yours. He didn't know what was happening to him, he just knew it was the right thing to do. He had to subdue you, show you that he was in charge and that this garden belonged to him, that you belonged to him. All of you. His ears were on the lookout for every sound and whimper that escaped your mouth. You were short of breath and jerking vehemently beneath him, clawing at the ground as his two hands held your wrists close to your head.

"Jung- Jungwon !"

"Ah~…" The boy couldn't help but groan at the sound of your name in his mouth. So cute, calling for help to the same exact person who was submitting you. He couldn't get enough of hearing your voice, especially if it sounded so pretty when he was bending you over in front of him. He couldn't help thrusting his hips against yours, rubbing against your bottom as he watched your legs bend under his will, watching that sweater bathed in your owner's scent ride up your thighs, briefly letting him catch a glimpse of your underwear. "Won't you be nice and listen Kitten ? Huh ? Would you do that for me ?"

You didn't answer and instead decided to fight harder, trying to turn the situation around. You felt so vulnerable, so small, and you loved every second of it. But was life without a bit of spices ? Jungwon disagreed. He didn't need spices in his life. He could add some himself, hell, he was the spices. And he'd make you understand, even if it meant leaving dozens of fang marks in the skin of your neck. It was his instinct, after all. So he leaned over and bit you once more, nipping at your skin between his lips. And it seemed he'd hit the right spot as you suddenly stopped moving, your hitherto small pupils dilated and your ears drooped, a low purring emanating from you. Unconsciously your body leaned towards his, your pelvis pressing against his, occasionally shifting against his now hard on.

"Good kitten ! You're such a good kitten !" Jungwon moaned softly in your ear again and again as he was idly rutting his cock on your ass, panting ever so slightly while praising you. He'd succeeded in submitting you to him. You belonged to him. His sweet and cute kitten. His mind was fuzzy, head empty, filled with thoughts of you. Thinking about what he should do next. And then he came to the realization that you were just here, under him, presenting so willingly, not saying a thing and purring as he was mounting you. He could bred you now. You wanted it.

And oh yes you wanted it. You so wanted it. At least, a part of you wanted it. The same part who accepted that he was stronger than you, kept on telling you that he would take care of you. The same part that made you notice how he bent over you, keeping you pinned to the ground while taking care not to crush you, the one that made you notice how he licked your wound carefully, lovingly, a small and pitiful whine escaping from his lips at the sight of your bruised ear. The one that made you notice the way he gently and slowly pushed his hips against yours. You were lost into sub-space, literally, and only wanted to please him. You knew he would take good care of you.

"Want me to breed you ? Please, lemme breed you I beg you. I'll make you feel so good, please, huh ?"

"Wanna be nice..."

"What was that ?"

" Wa-Wanna be nice for you, will you breed me ? Pretty please ? Gon' be the nicest kitten ever !"

Jungwon lost it. You were so cute he almost felt guilty ruining you like that. But who else could make you feel good ? Your owner ? No, even if he used every word of love he wanted to call you, you always went back to see him through the balcony window. He was your priority, your referent, the person you were turning to, pushing your hips against, begging for him to fill you up. He began to lick the juncture between your neck and your collarbone before leaving open-mouthed kisses against your shoulder, where the far too large sweater fell loosely.

"Wanna mark you up Kitten, can I ?"

"No! Jake- Don't wan' Jakey to see-"

But it fell on deef ears as the mere mention of the Australian had been enough to piss him off, to make him jealous. He bit your shoulder, leaving two little holes in your skin, making you whimper and complain before licking the two glistening red beads.

"I'm sorry, so sorry, tastes so good, your skin is so soft."

Convinced you wouldn't try to escape, he released your wrist and began to massage your thigh, taking in all the sensations you were procuring him, welcoming them with open arms. His hand moved gently up your thigh, stopping somewhere near your clothed core in order to push your legs apart with a surprisingly strong grip. You arch your back even more, pushing again your hips into his, your tail frantically waving form side to side because of the constant attention your body was receiving.

It all felt unreal, his dick poking your back, his tongue swiping across your skin and his warm hands massaging you, worshipping you as if you were a goddess made of the finest porcelain. You felt loved. Every bit of you, every single nerves were buzzing with apprehension, wondering what he would do next, where his hands would lay, what part of your body would be stroked by his warm and wet tongue. Neediness was overflowing from your body, drenching him in your scent. Aroused, horny.

And you didn't have to wait any longer for his hand to rest on the area where you were suffering the most, where you needed him the most.

"Yes yes yes ! Right here please please please." you moaned desperately, pushing your clothed cunt into his hand, feeling his finger dig into your panties.

"You're so wet… Can feel it through your panties-" he inhaled deeply, his hips pushing against yours on their own as he stifled a moan in the hollow of your neck. "-you're gon' take me so well Kitten…"

You nodded eagerly, fist clutching around a mop of grass, ass pressing against his bulge trying to put something inside of you, anything. Your eyes were misty, your senses alert, the only thing in your world, in your bubble, was Jungwon. Pretty boy from across the garden, nice and sweet indoor cat who grabbed your heart and hid it between his fingers, keeping it warm for rainy days. But now you wanted something else on his fingers.

And he was ready to give you what you wanted and more. So he lifted himself off you for just a few seconds and pulled your sweatshirt up to the middle of your back, his eyes far too lost on your face, drinking in the expressions he wore, this time choosing to ignore the delicious view below. The curve of your buttocks, so pretty in your underwear, pressed right up against his crotch. But that wasn't something he wanted to dwell on. No, your panties were in excess. So with a swift gesture he pulled them down, letting your body feel the coolness of the outside. The wind seemed far too cold against your folds, warm, dripping with juices.

Jungwon was trying as hard as he could to slow down or stop the rhythm of his hips against yours. After all, he had to keep his seed for you, be careful not to lose a single drop, everything had to be inside. With a hand trembling with excitement, he slid his fingers along your folds, gathering all your slick before pushing two inside your hole without even warning you, and not just at the entrance. He pushed them in as far as he could, until his palm was pressed against your pulsing clit. Until you wiggled beneath him, a babbling mess.

"Ngh- Too deep !"

"No, need my Kitten to be ready to take me, right ? You can take it."

You hesitated, briefly trying to stand up only to be pushed back by his torso against yours. He peppered your cheek with kisses, occasionally nibbling at your ear as he was pressing his length against you harder. A silent warning.

"You're gon' be good for me, right ? Want to please me ? I want to please you."

"Yes, want to make you feel good…" you let out in a broken whimper, tears welling up your eyes at how overwhelmed you felt. "Gon' be a good kitten for Jungwon."

And with that, he began to move his fingers in and out of your vagina, in rhythm with the movements of his pelvis. He could feel everything. The warmth of your pussy around his fingers, how warm, spongy and good it felt. His eyes almost rolled back into his skull at the sensation of your walls tightening around him. Your body was so ready for him that his fingers slid effortlessly in and out, your juices dripping on his other fingers, making a mess on his hands. No that he minded. He just wanted to lick it all off, taste the treasure emanating from your private parts and get drunk on it. But the control he had over his body was almost non-existent at that moment.

As your moans gained in intensity, just as a strange sensation seemed to have lodged itself in your belly, he hastily withdrew his fingers from your core. A cry left your mouth so he kissed your head, reassuring you, before pulling down his jogging pants and boxers, just enough for his dick to come out, standing in all its glory. Hard, red, ready and leaking. Those low quality porn and his right hand could never replace you, even if he was surely going to masturbate at the memory of what was going to happen.

You felt his hard and dripping cock on your bare ass and you failed to contain your moan. It was heavy and warm, you just knew it would feel so good inside of you. He grabbed his length and reached between your legs, starting to desperately rub his cock between your folds so that it was drowned in your juices. Slippy and wet so it wouldn't hurt you when going inside. But Jungwon doubted he needed to do that, he was confident he could go straight in without risking hurting you. It was just that little voice in his head telling him to touch you more, to make the moment and the pleasure last. And he'd almost have cum if he hadn't grabbed the base of his cock, squeezing it tightly to keep it from spilling his fluids onto your thighs, biting his lip so hard he'd almost bleed.

"Can I put it in ? Please please."

"Please !"

He exhaled and pressed the tip at your entrance, pushing experimentally, penetrating you only a few centimeters before retracting. His breath was heavy and his palms sweaty, and the cat side of his DNA kept telling him only one thing. Mount… Mount. Mount ! So he did. He mounted you, pushing his dick deep inside you while biting your neck once again, frowning as he was focusing on knocking you up, on filling you with his kittens.

"Thank you, thank you thank you so much!"

He was too a babbling mess. But unlike you, he was present and aware of what he was doing. You ? You were vaguely aware and okay with what was going on, too lost into the subspace to protest or talk anymore. Every word and phrase that tried to come out of your mouth was muffled by your cries of pleasure, your moans just stuck in your throat, begging to be said. And yet, one word wasn't affected by your mutism. You were moaning it again and again.

"Jungwon, Jung-Jungwon-"

"I'm right here. Just- Tryin' to hold myself back."

"Don't ! Going- Gonna take it all ! F'you !"

You were so unfair to him. While he was trying to respect you and your body, you gave yourself the right to be so hot underneath him, driving him to temptation, to ruin you. The kitten whose eyes he hadn't been able to take his eyes off these last few weeks. The one who always smiled shyly at him from his balcony on the other side of the garden. The one who had occupied his thoughts, driving him mad. But if you gave him the right, then he was going to give you back to your owner tainted black and dirtied with his semen.

He didn't even try to pretend to be nice or gentle. You said it yourself, he didn't need to hold back. So he began a merciless rhythm, pounding your flesh hard and fast, drowning in the pleasure he was feeling. He felt like his dick was suffocating in your pussy. Your walls gripped him deliciously hard and your heat made him burn from the inside out. A burning passion alongside his burning love for you, pushing him to go ever harder, ever faster, practically lying on top of you as his feet planted into the ground to get better control over his frantic pace. He felt like he was going crazy, pussydrunk even, even though he always laughed at some of his friends who spent their time talking about sex. He didn't understand its appeal, not even after masturbating. But having you there, underneath him, singing his praises as your body welcomed him in the best way possible, introduced him to a whole new world. He didn't care about sex. What he wouldn't shut up about now was sex with you. And yet, he was far too respectful to talk about this to anyone.

Growling into the back of your neck as he felt his high approaching, his hand covered in your slick, previously resting on your hip, caressed your stomach with his fingertips before finding your bra. He whined, pushing it upward and his warm and wet finger found your nipple, toying with it, rolling it between his finger and tugging at it before he grabbed your whole breast and started to grop it as if it were a stress ball. You gasp and the frenetic movements of your tail redoubled in intensity, the tip of it tickling Jungwon's bare hip. With the minimum of control he had over his tail, he managed to intertwine it with yours in a gesture of pure affection that made you weep softly as your heart overflowed with joy.

All these emotions were bothering you, and you didn't know what to do with yourself. Your mind wandered, dwelling first on the feel of his fingers on your chest, then on his mouth, which had not once stopped nibbling at your skin, before focusing on the sensation in your gut. Like a water balloon that kept swelling as more water was added, fueled by the sensation of his dick rearranging your insides, by the obscene noise your slick and his precum made every time his pelvis met your buttocks in a languorous, precise hip movement. And the position ? You might as well be eating grass, you didn't care if it meant he could have you and you could have him.

"Tiny pussy, dripping for me, so good so so good."

"All for you~!"

"Thank you thank you- Gonna fill you up with my kittens, want' be the prettiest mom ever ? The mother of my kittens ?"

"Yes, please..."

"Don't spill a single drop of it."

On that phrase you felt your insides being painted white, his dick shooting ropes and ropes of his cum into your hole. It was warm and made you feel good, full, dazed in a haze as he was firmly pressing his pelvis on your cunt, wanting everything to be inside. Even fully in he gave one last thrust who made you see the stars as you came undone around his dick, sucking his sperms in as your walls were convulsing and you were mewling, nails dug in the soil to keep you a minimum grounded. He moaned in your ear before affectionately chomping on it, a wide although timid smile on his face.

He waited for your labored breathing to calm before gently withdrawing from you, making you whimper at the overstimulation. "I know, I'm sorry." Carefully, he laid you on your back and straightened on his knees, looking you up and down, trying to burn that image into his retinas. Your face was flushed and your ears folded against your skull, your gaze distant and your eyes heart-shaped. Your sweater was pulled up to your navel, giving him a magnificent view of your ruined and glistening pussy, dripping with your mixed cum, lower lips red and puffy because of how he abused them while slamming his hips into yours. Your pantie was hanging somewhere near your knees and your chest was heaving up and down as you were trying to catch your breath. Soft skin glistening with your sweat, so tempting.

Gently, he pulled up your pantie, putting then back on you, and his hands slid under your cloth in order to put your bra back on too. Frowning, he focused, trying to see what was out of the ordinary. The bite marks he'd left on you were barely visible, he'd made sure his canines didn't inflict a hole bigger than a needle, so your neck was safe. Nothing was out of the ordinary except your totally lost and distant gaze and your flushed cheeks. Oh, wait, there was a little cum on your thigh. With his fingertips he cleaned your skin as best he could before bringing the mixture to his lips and devouring it whole, moaning at the taste of your cum on his taste buds. Voilà ! He could return you as good as new to this 'Jake', the only proof of your intercourse lodged deep in your womb and accumulated in your panties.

He pulled up his stockings in turn and, purring, lay down beside you, occasionally licking your damaged ear while nudging his head on yours. In turn, you snuggled up to him and sighed with contentment, falling asleep in the shade of the Willow, in a warmth that was bearable by his side.

A few minutes later, while you were both asleep against each other, your tails entwined affectionately, Jay and Jake returned from their little escapade with bags of food in their hands, chatting loudly. Jake was pleased to know that despite his cold and distant exterior Jay was in fact a really good person who always had something interesting to say. He hoped to become good friends with him, to discover that side of his personality that made him laugh loudly and swear accidentally in the middle of the street - and maybe also to cuddle Jungwon, he was adorable.

So when their eyes roamed the garden in search of you and they didn't see you, they both knew that their friendship could blossom like your love on that balcony. Sitting down, they lowered the volume of their voices and began their meal, getting to know each other.

D-36

"Come on mate, come down come down, need you right now…" Jake pressed his finger on the intercom button again and again while mumbling, hoping his message would reach his friend's ears faster.

He was in distress. He was praying for the ground to open up beneath his feet or for someone to tell him it was all a bad joke. A nightmare he'd wake up from any minute, be greeted by your pretty face against his chest, eyes blinking idly, mouth opening wide as you're yawning.

"Jake ?"

The Australian turned at full speed towards Jay, who had just emerged from the garage adjacent to his building, and rushed towards him, eyes lost and hands shaking, laughing nervously.

"You're good ? You're a bit pale, wanna go-"

"-My cat's pregnant. Jungwon is the father."

[cloveroctobers]

OCTOBER PROMPTS 🎃 — 8. Hector

A/N: the way I always had something in the drafts to write for my beloved man like back during the summer time. The universe had other plans and what better time than to revisit this episode on Halloween! I think this is my first time ever writing on the day of this superior season?! Happy Halloween people 🧡 🪄

WARNINGS: language + hints of sexual tension 😅

PROMPT is from HERE + I’m using: “I love you, I swear I do but we’re not wearing matching costumes.”

₊˚ ✧ ♱‧₊˚. ₊˚ ✧ ♱‧₊˚. ₊˚ ✧ ♱‧₊˚. ₊˚ ✧ ♱‧₊˚. ₊˚ ✧ ♱‧₊˚. ₊˚

[~October. 2000’s~]

Oh the wonders of being a big time celebrity during the month of Halloween. That’s right, a whole entire month! Which felt like so because you were constantly in the limelight with people not only dissecting your love life but also your roles which consisted of either being the lead scream queen in a thriller series, supporting actress in horror movies, and also being the star drummer (on some Sheila E shit!) and backup singer of a Alt-Pop girl band on the side.

So yes, you stayed busy and were worth talking about.

“Whatever you decide to be this year has to be big. I mean Destiny’s child, Britney Spears, Zac and Vanessa, and Halle Berry are all gonna be here at your party this year.” Your manager/publicist ranted as she paced the floor in your open concept closet.

You’re lounging on your studded chaise lounge chair, texting away on your blackberry while chewing on some gum, half listening, “Halle’s my god-mom, of course she will be here to support but who else is on this list exactly?”

“I invited pretty much everyone, the hottest stars even those who may or may be in your age range. It doesn’t matter! As long as you get good pics that brings fresh press.” Natania voiced as she began flipping through a notepad.

You hum knowing the deal, considering you’ve been in the limelight since you were fourteen so this was not anything entirely new. “I’ve got the perfect outfit for Hector and I.”

Natania glances up from writing, “funny you mention him after I say press.”

“Him has a name and who also happens to be my boyfriend?”

“Don’t remind me,” Natania mutters, “and just to think you could still be with Taylor Lautner right now. His stats are only climbing after ‘Breaking Dawn Part I,’ dropped and I can only imagine how much more attention he’s gonna get.”

Shrugging your shoulders you say, “I’ve got more than enough attention with and without a guy by my side. It was fun while it lasted but as soon as he booked the role for twilight, the distance just grew. It was all only a matter of time.”

At sixteen and seventeen years old you got into a relationship, naturally with who everyone may know as Jacob Black but he was just Taylor to you. You met way back in a martial arts class that your uncle actually taught but you didn’t end up sticking with it thanks to a tv series you booked. You met again not long after at a audition for “Sharkboy and LavaGirl.”

“Well the both of you could have at least faked it for a little!” Natania almost stomped her feet before sighing, “I mean Taylor still talks highly about you although you decided to pick a old paparazzi instead as your new fling.”

“I wouldn’t expect him to say anything less,” you blinked, “wasn’t a bad break up anyway and I don’t pay you to make judgements on who I date. I pay for you to manage my career, not my personal life, sooo mind yours.”

Natania rolled her eyes beneath her glasses, “whatever, you’re right. I’m just saying you could have done better. There’s just something off about him—Hector and not the whole follow people like you around for cash either.”

“Nat!” You hissed, “shut up already, hector’s coming over, he’s gonna be at that party with me and that’s that. When’s the stylist coming over?”

Natania puts on a forced smile and glances at the watch on her wrist, “in about a hour.”

“Great! Hector says he’ll be here in fifteen so that gives us a little down time. You can let yourself out whenever you’re ready.” You state laying back to rest your eyes.

You’ve been up since six thirty this morning doing a extreme workout routine you didn’t like with a trainer who took it too seriously. You were more of a cardio person than juggling ropes, jumping and squatting, and flipping over tires.

Soon the door bell rings and you pry one eye open to see the monitor by the door glowing, making you aware who it could be. Groaning you took your time getting closer to the screen, seeing no one there. Shrugging to yourself, you plopped down on the lounge just as your closet door budged open revealing your stylist and no other than your boyfriend, Hector.

Lounging on your elbows you smile and wave at the two.

“No, please. Don’t get up, I got it.” Your stylist wheeled in a rack while you laughed at the usual sarcasm.

“Hey, baby.” You craned your neck to meet Hector’s lips as he leaned over you in greeting before sitting next to you, “what happened to fifteen minutes?”

Hector laughs, rubbing at the back of his neck, knowing that he was late, “traffic? Even on my bike and Hunger…”

You hum at this.

“Just burgers.” Hector whispers as you shrug your shoulders.

You knew what it was like, actually dating someone in the supernatural world. It could always go one or two ways and of course there were heavy rumors surrounding Hector since he was there at the time of Mazey Day’s death. He should have been dead—especially with the amount of damage done to his body, you knew what he and Bo were up to and the pictures Bo showed you was not something you would forget.

However Hector was meant to live and see it through…and he did with the help of your family.

They got to him first.

That’s right, a long history of, “werewolf or wolf training,” depending on which form. You had more experience with simply wolfs while the higher skilled like your parents and siblings dealt with the werewolf’s. Due to your involvement with the spotlight you didn’t have much time for…family activities but you weren’t completely clueless.

If you were able to get to Mazey Day in time, perhaps things could have been different. No one really knew and some still didnt accept what it was.

Werewolves were fucking real and you so happened to be dating one.

“Soooo,” you drag pushing yourself up once more to face Hector with a tired smile, “I’ve got an idea of what we should be for Halloween.”

“Aw but you didn’t see what Freddie brought yet.”

“Oh it’s in there alright,” you push off the chair to head over to Freddie who has measuring tape draped over his shoulders.

You do the honors of taking the protective cover off the clothes and run your fingers over the various fabrics, “we have DoubleDare contestants from the 90s, or you can be Cupid and I’ll be a large fuzzy heart, or my personal fav: little red riding hood and her werewolf of a grandmother.”

Hector blinks after briefly studying the costumes and says, “I love you, I swear I do but we’re not wearing matching costumes.”

“Uh oh,” Freddie mutters while you frown at the curly haired man.

“And why the hell not? The last option is the best one.”

“I get that one,” Hector replies with a knowing look in his dark eyes, “but don’t you think it’s a little…corny?”

“We’re supposed to be corny! You’re my boyfriend and I’m your girl.” Digging your fists into your hips and peer at Hector who snorts.

“Yeah but—

“At least try it on! I mean if we’re gonna be at my party together shouldn’t we at least match?”

Hector lightly grips your wrist to pull you from Freddie’s ear shot, “it’s gonna be a full moon that night.”

“Even better.”

“For who? Not me.”

“It’s been a year already,” you slip your hand down to squeeze his, “you’re gonna be fine.”

“That’s not what your mom believes.” Hector’s shoulders almost slump, which irritates you, the fact that your mother was always getting into his head was not something foreign to you but when she started to do it to people you cared about, that’s when it became a problem.

“Newsflash, she doesn’t know everything like she claims.”

“I mean I should listen to her since…”

“Since she’s more skilled than me? Ah alright well I get it. Look, I’m not gonna peer pressure you. I just know I wouldn’t have you here if I didn’t think you could handle it. We’d take all the proper precautions a few days before just like I planned but if you really don’t feel comfortable…we’ll just make sure to take the pictures in advance and we’ll go from there.”

Hector studies you then. He knew that it was hard to be around each other sometimes whenever the moon shifted. He was thankful he got another chance at life…sure but life just become a whole lot more difficult now with this new lifestyle and being legit involved with someone in the public eye. No doubt he’s thought about it before but never pictured it happening and Bo also told him it was a bad idea after figuring out that he basically resurrected and could transform into a hairy ass creature!

You lived one way and he lived another, there were contrasts to you just like the sun and the moon, the pair of you worked taking turns to let the other breathe separately. Space was efficient when it came to your relationship but when you were together? That opened up a whole new feeling. A scary one. He wasn’t sure if this relationship would be long term but he had the chance to see you for what you are beyond the lights and that was a treat in itself.

He exhales, lifting a hand to cup the side of your face, “…let’s try these costumes on then.”

And you squeal, hopping into his arms and he holds onto you as you lock your legs around his hips, his beaming smile meeting yours as you peck all along his handsome face.

“We look foolish,” Hector comments as he readjusts the gingham hat on top of his head while you stand side by side in a full length mirror.

You laugh as you wrap your arms around the curly haired man in the floral green nightgown, “correction: we look fine as hell.”

“Fine enough to where I don’t need to spend two hours sitting in a chair having ass cramps and getting wolf prosthetics on?” Hector slips on his circular glasses and peeks over them at your reflection.

Red was certainly your color.

You snort, “you could always let the moon do it’s thing.”

“That’s not even funny.”

Pressing your chin against the back of his shoulder you say, “Wanna give me a little snarl or something?”

Hector sends you a pointed look as you trail one hand up to twist one of his damp curls, “Oh Granny, what pretty curls you have.”

“All the better for you to tug my dear,” Hector begins to play along.

A smirk makes its way onto your red painted lips, “Oh granny, what a beautiful face you have.”

“All the better for you to,” Hector starts before quickly twisting his body to yank you tight against his body, “sit on.”

You see the specs of ember swirling in Hector’s ink eyes now and you know you were pushing it as the length of his nails began to poke at the fabric of your red hood.

He then places a open mouthed kiss to your beating throat, “you didn’t say anything about my teeth.”

Standing up some with your hands locked around his neck now, you lean just a bit closer so that your forehead presses against Hector’s; you reply just as some knocks sounded at your closet door, “Now that’s satire.”

Hector let’s out a small laugh as you untangle yourself from his grasp to get the door, making a show of pointing the makeup artists in his direction only.

With your confidence in him and against the full moon, Hector can’t help but to shrug his shoulders and take a seat peeking at the face he got used to over the years. Somehow even this skin felt different and not just the scars embedded.

He just hoped you were right but knew he wouldn’t hear the end of it.

Well…here’s to a new change of course for Halloween! That might actually be terrifying but as long as he had you on his team, his doubts and speculations from outsiders—which he used to be—didn’t seem to matter as much anymore.

₊˚ ✧ ♱‧₊˚. ₊˚ ✧ ♱‧₊˚. ₊˚ ✧ ♱‧₊˚. ₊˚ ✧ ♱‧₊˚. ₊˚ ✧ ♱‧₊˚. ₊˚

Continue along with my fall anthology prompts here.

[doom-nerdo-666]

"Deconstructing" the Dark Lord

There's a lot of things to be said about this character.

The most i usually say is "it's a mix of things that could have been seperate" and there's a good reason: He's a character almost made special by the ingredients combined that define him.

And each idea that represents him lead to fans expect anything but the final result and i believe even id themselves have second thoughts about this character (You've probably heard the idea that he was supposed to have a dragon phase).

So this post of mine is both me explaining why some fans didn't like the Dark Lord, while also thinking out ideas that could've worked or appealed more to fans.

Even if some of these ideas don't make a lot of sense or "contradict lore", it's more about Doom "being epic" and how some concepts rank in a "cool factor" for a series like Doom (At least considering some fans).

MAJOR SPOILERS, even if this is Doom.

"EVIL DOOMGUY"

People expected a 1v1 style duel where you fight a "mirror/copy" of Doomguy and not a "retouched Marauder" (This specifically feels wrong in the era of the series where lore matters a bit more and there's a special focus around Doomguy's current state as the ultimate demon killer).

The explenation of him looking like Doomguy may not help: I forgot but i think it's a weird context that means Doomguy IS the actual copy even if not intentional (To fans, Doomguy's appeal is that he was a random guy that got into a whole mess and wasn't always special).

And i guess how Doomguy's face isn't faithfull enough in 3D yet, but i mentioned that in a previous post of mine.

Ideally, "Evil Doomguy" could be like this:

Make the armor like the Immora/Skullface/Cultist skins where it's a demonic version of the Praetor suit.

Give him an arsenal of different weapons that are bound to phases.

The phase weapon system means he could start with a weak pistol and shotgun, like he's growing his arsenal by phases.

His weapons (Shotguns, chaingun, rifle, rocket launcher, plasma rifle, Gauss/Ballista equivalent etc) would have somewhat unique/different alt fires/mods even if their primary fires are the same as the player's.

At the last phase, he'd obviously have a BFG9000 and a Crucible with its own melee attacks.

Even his Chainsaw has melee attacks.

He can also double jump and dash, while also having his own equipment launcher cannon.

He can glory kill nearby fodder enemies for resources: THIS right here is his weakness, because he can run out of resources and has to fight for them like Doomguy does, so it's like a window of opportunity to hit him back.

His health bar has his own animated face on the HUD, just to show how much of a Doomguy clone he is.

At some point, his helmet falls during combat and he shows his face.

Lore: Make him a creation by Hell that exists as a mix of both fear and hatred Hell has toward Doomguy.

Alt lore idea: Remember Doomguy's boss that was mentioned in the D1 manual? Maybe he ended up going through his own journey through Hell and became an "Anti-Slayer" (And then his shoulder equip launcher is like a snake creature).

Stage? Maybe something like a "deathmatch arena" you'd expect out of Quake 3 or something, since a simple large circular area won't be good enough.

The idea of a rival for Doomguy seems special when you consider factors like how the Marauder still had a limited arsenal, when D3 has a boss that was Doomguy's boss turned into a monster with the BFG9000, zombie soldiers always carrying familiar/ingame weapons etc.

Plus, "evil version of the protagonist" is popular in some other games as well, so it's like Doom lied about its own version of it.

(Scythe 2 screenshot taken from Doomwiki, since the wad includes an "evil marine" that the player faces; Speaking of which, Colorfull Hell had a boss called "Player 9" that replaces the Zombieman and it's a fake deathmatch player invading your game)

Also, remember “voodoo dolls” from the Doom engine? Imagine if Doomguy saw these strange copies of him before facing an “anti-Doomguy” and the player even had to avoid shooting these Doomguy clones because they’d cost Doomguy’s health as well (Because that’s technically why they’re called “voodoo dolls” to begin with and are how some WADs get to do weird things not even id themselves considered).

THE "DEVIL" OF DOOM

Because if it's not the Icon of Sin, maybe "the Devil" could have been a bigger creature, almost like planet size or even "Hell itself" if you assume that an infinite, reality defying, evil dimension can be its own living entity.

A “planet sized demon” could easily be Doom’s version of Junji Ito’s Remina, like something as a follow up to “Doomguy shoots the BFG10K on Mars to make a hole” and even a nod to TNT Revilution’s first skybox, but with for example an Icon of Sin head attached to Jupiter or something.

So depending on how "eldritch" and giant the "CEO of Hell" would be implied to be, i thought of a boss fight where you're "inside the beast" and combines level puzzle elements with combat.

Visually, it has a weird surreal aesthetic like all the weirdest parts of Hell combined and some new weird elements.

But there's a variety of weak points (Some shootable, others punchable, even some where you jump on top of them like that "Jumpable" enemy idea i wrote before) where the Player fights the beast they're inside in, while avoiding hazards and traps to stay alive.

Maybe there's special artifacts or items (Some unique to this fight) to keep the player closer to their goal.

In general, this idea is inspired by stuff like the classic IOS and Quake's Chthon and Shub fights where the level design is part of defeating the boss (Along with D2RPG having the VIOS or something).

Then there's the seemingly unused "6 archdemons".

Maybe we could even go with the idea that Hell has a lot more "dark lords" because humans will never truly comprehend who rules Hell, as if it was meant to confuse humans.

Meanwhile, John Romero's SIGIL ending text had the phrase "Baphomet was only doing Satan's bidding" and the episode made use of Christopher Lovell's pre-existing "Satanic" artwork.

Also, the “real Devil of Doom” could involve a “ultimate endgame” style level where reality is falling apart and you see different assets of Hell/Earth/Mars/Sentinel Prime/Urdak/etc fused and mixed, while the level has non-euclidean geometry and gravity attached to different surfaces and even the skybox shows different backgrounds fused, to indicate Hell messing up with reality.

ALSO GOD

I think people were already fine with The Father, even if not with the twist of him also being VEGA.

But to think Doomguy technically "kills God" because him and "Satan" were the same thing seems odd.

Maybe this also depends on how people feel about Urdak and whether or not Doom is getting "less Christian" even if the series never tapped that much into "accurate" Biblical references.

THE MECH SUIT

It's something that could have been a super heavy enemy at best, like if Immora's army had mech guys or even if 2016's Hell Guard made a comeback with a tech aesthetic (Yet again, something i wrote in a previous post).

Davoth wearing this armor doesn't really give the idea of being "on pair" with Doomguy.

It's weird because the mech itself makes him bigger than Doomguy but he only has few attacks.

THE NAME "DAVOTH"

The use of the name “Davoth” and one of the concept art knight designs of the Dark Lord could inspire a tall humanoid Immoran knight that references Goliath; So imagine if Immora had a 12 feet tall knight named Davoth and he could be a miniboss or something.

The name itself isn't bad and neither is that "metal heart" thing on his chest, even if it sounds like i'm talking about reusing them for something else.

CHARACTER AND MOTIVATION

Might be getting it wrong, but wasn't he mad that he didn't found immortality or something and that lead to him being betrayed by his own servants?

Because when you think of the idea of Hell, you'd think he could have been "Evil for the sake of it".

May seem weird for a series whose appeal is "badass space marine destroys the ultimate place of evil".

IMMORA

Also something i talked about before but:

The idea of "Hell's heart" being a city with humans seems weird for, again, the place of evil where bad people go where they die.

And the sci-fi aesthetic seems weird, not just because "they painted Urdak red" but because the original games already had an idea of "Hell tech".

(Again, flesh walls with stabbing metal pipes and giant skull with computers inside the sockets)

When you think about it, it's as if Hell only ever had technology just to mock humans; Something in a "God creates, Satan imitates" way.

Even the Cultist Base aesthetic could've worked to suit the "evil technology" idea.

It's part of why i thought 2016 making it that the UAC created cybernetic demons is weird: It might weaken Hell a bit and take away the weirdness that the classic games already presented.

Because even if Hell had armies and stuff that almost put them on the same level as UAC/Sentinel soldiers, it should still have a touch of "evil magic" or as if something was created from a spiteful nature.

Indicating that Hell has a 100% evil "personality" that cannot be reasoned with.

And also, like i said: D2016's multiplayer had cooler demonic armor sets and the Reaper weapon was done dirty when used by the Demonic Troopers.

I thought Immora would work more if it was a "paradise for sinners" where its soldiers were sinners and evil former humans that were more competent than other former humans because they were "rewarded".

Maybe a legit Satanic cult paradise, where its humans are those that betrayed mankind?

And the fact that there's "humans" in Immora could justify them as "evil copies/parodies", so you could make demons that look "humanoid" but are still weird.

WHAT ELSE

It's easy to see that The Ancient Gods shouldn't have been made under a year one season pass release contract.

But i wonder if even without those limitations, things would change that much.

Because Doom was never a "lore bound" series, which is why i think there's an "easy" solution to "bad lore ideas": Just having a new game do things differently, even if they "break lore".

Perhaps the fact we even think of "how to fix the Dark Lord" means there's a somewhat positive impact on the DL existing in general: A reminder that Doom is fun to reinterpret.

Whether it's for fun or because some fans weren't happy with certain things.

One can also see thing as "fans making Doom more epic than it actually is", even if it's not new/caused by new fans when older fans were always doing that too.

"What about the dragon idea?" Maybe make that a seperate monster/boss, even with some homage to the D3 Maledict or even Quake and Hexen or something.

FooSarr did an interesting video about a demonic Wintherin, but i already posted it before.

And semi-related but Bethesda artist Jonah Lobe drew a "demonic" version of the Doomslayer.

Perhaps a criticism is that it factors too much into certain D2016 aspects that made the demons "even more alien than in D3", though this is a prespective worth mentioning in a different post.

Honestly, it feels like there's a lot of ways you can go with "evil Doomguy"; Again, me talking about Doom's "true versatility" even if it's too easy to talk about it than anything actually being made.

At least the idea of Doomguy being put to rest after defeating the main bad guy isn't so bad and i guess his theme song wasn't bad either.

Could have said something about the "final fight" starring the Sentinel army and how Doomguy needed to go to Earth to use the gate to Divum or something but maybe for another post.

[lemonmatronicsart]

Muki and Tailor repost since I’ve written out their actual bios since their first post!

Alts and Bios below the cut

Muki

     A classic rags to riches style story, Muki and her sister grew up in a much more unsavory setting.

     Father dying while they were young and sending their mother spiraling, Muki and her sister both has to raise themselves for a long time. Due to this Muki didn’t gain many social skills, having to focus on surviving more than living a childhood. Little does she realize her older sister Tailor got the worse end of the issue.

     Despite her situation, Muki always admired The Bad Crowd’s previous ruler. Needing someone to idolize and inspire her (RIP Tailor), she turned to lionizing Bluster’s mother. Dreaming of one day performing for her.

     She never got to live that dream.

     While Muki always loved to sing, turning to it as a comfort in her younger years and overtime becoming a talent, she started gaining attention for it in her late teens. At first she didn’t adjust to the sudden praise well, not being used to any sort of spotlight, but after taking some advice from her sister she embraced the opportunity for a better life.

     Play a persona that can handle it. That’s what she had to do, and damnit it worked. A wall of mean blocking out the real her that would undoubtedly get pushed over. Muki only gained more and more traction as word spread about her, and the fake face had to stay on more and more.

     Until eventually…well it just wasn’t fake anymore.

     The defense mechanism used to keep herself from being used becoming so vital to her life it simply never left. Becoming even more defensive and cruel worded as time went on, and she treated everyone around her equally awful.

     Nobody would notice this change, not knowing the little girl she used to be.

     But Tailor did.

     Additional character relations note:

Muki collabed with another music artist named Pic Ringlee during the early stages of her singing career. While at the time she was singing safe poppy stuff that didn’t challenge her much, Ringlee heard her music and could just tell her voice was capable of more. He offered her the chance to collab on a song with him, which she happily accepted.

     The collab itself was fine, great even, and got Muki’s name further out there. Since then her main style of music incorporated both rock and pop into a mesh of a blend that made her stand out. However, also completely overshadow Ringlee. Leading to a growing resentment and eventual blow up at Muki, a major blow to her ego considering she’d grown to look up to the guy.

     Later on Ringlee would realize just how childish it was of him to act as such after a long series of misfortunes. But his story is for another day.

     Years later when he reached out to Muki to make things right she absolutely refused to listen to him. The fact it wasn’t long after Tailor ditched her not helping in the slightest. Accidentally just contributing to Muki’s slow but steady mental slip.

     Additional character relations note:

Muki has a body guard named Unar she eventually fell into a situationship with. Remember him, their whole deal will be revealed when he’s posted. Just wanna note he’s important

Tailor

     Growing up Tailor had to not only raise herself due to her mother’s depressive negligence, but had to raise her little sister too. Giving up many learning opportunities when it came to her passion, fashion, so she could be there for her sister. Never telling Muki about the given up classes and job offers. Despite only being three years older than her, Tailor practically becoming a parent against her will.

     On some nights, she did find time to sketch and design outfits. Almost never being able to bring them to life, but her drive to brainstorm couldn’t die. Especially when Muki also found it interesting. Sometimes snuggling up next to her and watching her sketch to fall asleep. Tailor never minded, in fact, she liked that her sister enjoyed her work. Even if it only stayed on the pages for years.

     At most she would have to sew up holes in their clothes or adjust them to fit new sizes, unable to spend money on buying more. She gifted presents to Muki when she could, but with their mother’s depression only making her sick over the years, they both knew what they needed to focus on.

     Eventually, Muki’s talents were the ones noticed. Both of them knowing how much of an opportunity The Bad Crowd hearing her voice could be, Tailor did everything she possibly could to help her. Finally, she was making real outfits. Simple ones, sure, but she was sewing and cutting again. All the while doing everything possible to help her sister adjust and find her places to perform. Slowly but surely getting her sister more well known not only in their area, but further out as well.

     As Muki became more popular and found ways to handle the limelight she always dreamed of beaming on her, she took Tailor with her. Rising budgets for a rising star, she was making the outfits she always dreamed of. Who better to costume design for Muki than her own sister?

     But things didn’t stay so great. Money was flowing, absolutely. They could finally indulge in simple treats they didn’t get to when they were young. But Muki…changed.

     At the start Tailor gave her some advice to beat her first show stage freight. Advice Muki would never let go of.

     “Be someone who can do it.”

     She remembered it word for word, over the years haunted by her own quote.

     Muki did become someone who could handle the music business. Someone mean, cruel, spoiled, and entitled. Unbearable to work with and constantly switching out employees.

     But Tailor stayed.

     Despite the fact she began being treated just as badly as Muki treated others, Tailor owed her sister. At least she felt like she did. Muki was the reason she wasn’t hungry while sewing clothes and designing costumes. She needed to be there, it was her sister damnit!…

     But a person can only take so much.

     She doesn’t understand why that day in particular drove her over the edge, but one too many dismissals of her work left Tailor absolutely heartbroken and hurt. She didn’t even care how many other people witnessed that fight.

     Tailor quit, unsure of where she was gonna go next.

     After taking some time off and collecting herself, Tailor began to look for real work again. Working for Muki before, many people wanted her. It wouldn’t be hard to find a good offer, but there was one that stood out above the others. One she just couldn’t refuse.

     Bluster didn’t even mind if she altered the complementary jacket! Granted, he didn’t expect her to go THAT nuts with it. But hey, her clothes not his.

Muki and Tailor can also be seen being depicted as friends with Kai and Minx respectively

Kai and Minx both belong to @zip-toonz

I’m not knowledgeable on them enough to write full blown bios about the characters on Toonie’s behalf but to sum the dynamics up shortly

Muki and Kai are both beloved singers that met each other through the music business. However both of them are very flawed people that have made some big mistakes, so they totally help each other realize that and grow right—? No they enable the hell out of each other because doing so in turn justifies their own actions as well.

Tailor meets Minx not long after leaving Muki and quickly end up being friends and bond over their shockingly similar turmoils. Unlike Muki and Kai, instead of bonding and enabling each other, they bond and find ways to help each other and grow. Especially Minx helping Tailor,,stuff’s a lot fresher for Tailor

[overdevelopedglasses]

Tojoctober Day 31 - Fly

(I follow the path I’ve chosen, searching in the endless night)

Alt title is from “Dreamcatcher” by Starset

Kiryu reflects.

(Spoilers. Just, spoilers.)

—---------------------------------------------

Is this the first time I’m choosing to stand as an obstacle?

I’ve been one before, out of obligation. I’ve been the insurmountable wall that koi have chosen to climb, and I’ve seen so many fall from a height unimaginable to myself. The role of legend was shoved upon me, and all I could do was accept and eventually embrace it. There was ever only one dragon, even when others rose to challenge it.

The path I’d chosen, one that’s flirted with death so many times, and has even made itself unrecognizable. Is this where it all leads to? Am I doomed to throw myself into the fire over and over until there’s nothing left? Am I destined to protect dreams but not dream for myself? 

Even being in prison for a quarter of my life barely deprived me of myself. First for selflessness, then for duty, I expected my agent life to be much of the same. A necessity to keep those I love safe. My family, as piecemeal as it is at times, can survive without me. They have before.

But I didn’t expect to feel so alone in my sacrifice.

I begin to sweat. Looking down, I adjust the cuffs of my sleeves, the all too familiar maroon peeking out from the sea of gray.

I never thought I’d don this suit again. The red and gray that I chose long ago to be my battle armor, taunted to wear for the rest of my life. While I proved him wrong, this suit is synonymous with my identity. When I threw my name into the fire years ago, naturally the suit went with it. To the world, Kazuma Kiryu is just a figure of legend.

Or so I thought.

I should’ve known that I can’t escape the ghosts of my past.

Throughout my time with the clan, I’ve seen past actions bite people in the ass. Sometimes they’re life lessons, sometimes it’s their demise. We always learn from the past, then use the present moment to define the next past. When we choose to cease hiding in the shadows, the figures of our past will be there to meet us.

I can still picture everyone's faces from the day the Fourth Chairman reemerged.

Watase, looking smug as ever, unwavering from the threats posed to him.

The legends of my past life, eyes shining with shock and hope.

The legends of the future, confused but allowing new adrenaline to soar through them.

The man whom I have no right to call my son, staring at me with the most warmth I’ve ever seen from him. His voice is the one that plays in my head, over and over. His words still sound like a dream.

And then… There's that one. 

Maybe it’s his eyes. Or the way he carries himself. Or that design that echoes his essence. Or where I almost saw him walk, mere hours ago. There are many facets to that man, and I’m not one to normally make quick assumptions.

However, their resemblance is uncanny. If I close my eyes, I can hear the echoes of his laugh, like a ghost sending shivers throughout my psyche. 

Maybe that’s why I’m here, edging so close to the disobedience of direct rules and orders.

I’m not going to let another man sink into the depths of that darkness. Not when I’m around to prevent it.

Opening my eyes, unaware that I had shut them to begin with, I hear the door open with a squeak, as pairs of footsteps follow. I look down at my watch, and take one last deep breath. I don’t need to turn around to know who’s there.

Alright.

It’s time I teach this young dragon how to fly.

[teaveetamer]

Fully understand if you don't care. Please ignore if you don't.

Vaush isn't and has never been far right. My recollection of the Noncompete/Vash debate regarding the Holocaust wasn't Vaush trying to gotcha Noncompete into having said the Holocaust was valid by 'his logic', it was him trying to point out that if the response people kept giving to the "well, jews were over-represented in banking and that's why-" was "no they weren't" if a nazi ever cites "well, according to these extenuating circumstances, they WERE" they wouldn't have any recourse to fall back on.

Vaush' point was that you need to have such a strong moral framework that you can still, undoubtedly say it was the wrong thing to do, arguments over details like "jews were over-represented in banking" being true or not. i.e. It doesn't matter if they were or weren't, that wasn't a justification for anyone's actions. Falling back on arguments that can get disproven or at the very least challenged locks you into a debate on the far-right's level instead of just broadly condemning them regardless of the details. What happened as a result of people believing this to be true does.

The debate got so poisoned and aggressive that no-one managed to convey their points properly, and NC left early before it got anywhere productive. Vaush had to explain where he was trying to lead the conversation in a stream afterwards bc the debate got full of so much stupid posturing that they never got that far.

He's a smart guy, but doesn't always say things in a way that's easy to follow in the moment. That's burned him more than once - rather severely. His overconfidence doesn't help.

Should probably point out that in a conversation with Vaush regarding the Debate Bro video Noah Samson released, Noah ended up walking back almost every point and I wouldn't be trusting his analysis of the situation anyway. This is also extremely niche community stuff, but there is actually this weird... debate bro vs video essayist schism in the online leftist sphere that's resulted in a fucktonne of well poisoning on either side.

I probably seem defensive, but that's mostly bc I've been watching both the right and leftists that don't like him twist the things he says into absolute pretzels to make him look like a terrible person. Not to say he's never done anything wrong or stupid though.

First off, I'm not saying that Vaush was a right winger, or that he ever made right wing content. Just that he, as a white (persumably cishet) man, has more than likely fallen into socially conservative ideology at some point in his life. Which isn't a dig at him, it's just how our culture is set up. We all need to deconstruct from societal brainwashing. Cishet white men just usually have the hardest time with that, because it means leaving behind a system that inherently advantages them.

Second, there's a lot we need to unpack here.

I rewatched the clip in question and in my interpretation, what I said in my other post about this is what I saw happening. But okay I concede that I didn't watch the entire stream so we will set aside my interpretation for a moment and go off of yours.

See, here's the thing. Based on what you said happened, I still think Vaush was dumb. Why? Because engaging with the right's false claims on any level still gives them the power to control the conversation. That is something you need to be acutely aware of every time you platform something like that.

When you platform a false argument you are, in essence, giving it equal validity to true claims. Your first priority after bringing it up should be explicitly discussing why it does not deserve equal validity to true claims. Vaush platformed an alt-right talking point, but did no work in attempting to deconstruct why people shouldn't believe it.

If you cannot do that effectively, then it is probably better if you don't bring it up at all. Because if you bring up a point and don't deconstruct it, you just platformed it for your audience who might actually believe it. Which is exactly what happened.

You have to keep in mind that even if that's not what he meant to do, his audience did take that claim from him and perpetuate alt-right misinformation in trying to defend Vaush from people who were calling him out for it. You have leftist spaces uncritically parroting a Nazi talking point with no understanding of why that claim is false or why it matters. And when they parrot that point then other left-leaning people might pick it up and repeat it, and on and on and on and you've basically just done the right's work for them.

The power of the right doesn't lie in their ability to make actual claims. It lies in their ability to manipulate rhetoric. Deconstructing rhetoric should have been the focus of that point, not "can you make enough smart boy arguments to get around stupid right winger claims" because alt-righters will always have a dumber claim to refute you.

If you can identify their rhetoric then you can poke their buttons and they will make your argument for you.

Vaush, stupidly, made their argument for them in doing what he did how he did it.

The debate got so poisoned and aggressive that no-one managed to convey their points properly, and NC left early before it got anywhere productive. Vaush had to explain where he was trying to lead the conversation in a stream afterwards bc the debate got full of so much stupid posturing that they never got that far.

Because the debate broadly seemed more about posturing and "being right" than having an actual conversation about an issue.

Like I said there are ways this conversation could have taken an educational or productive approach from the start. Like, instead of just throwing the alt-right claim out there you could ask "how would you respond if someone said 'Jews controlled the banks, therefore Nazis felt they were oppressed?'"

Not everything needs to be an argument. Sometimes you can just have a conversation. If you frame it like an argument and then use an alt-right talking point, you basically just argued for the alt-right.

He's a smart guy, but doesn't always say things in a way that's easy to follow in the moment. That's burned him more than once - rather severely. His overconfidence doesn't help.

I also have to say... is an unplanned, unprepared, off the cuff live debate really the best place to be bringing up these issues, especially for someone like Vaush who is, apparently, prone to sticking his foot in his mouth and largely outside of the groups affected (to my knowledge)?

I don't mean to be a bitch, but the entire role of debate is to be able to clearly and accurately convey your points in an argument. If he can't effectively do that and has a tendency toward posturing and "winning" rather than the exchange of ideas, then he's apt to do more harm than good.

I'm not saying that these livestreamers don't have their place, but video essays are invaluable precisely because they can take the time to do research and present arguments in the most clear, nuanced manner. If you are ignorant on stream then you are ignorant, and you're going to present that ignorance in the moment. Most people will go with the first thing they hear from you no matter how hard you try to backtrack or correct it down the line, so it's vitally important that you get it right the first time. ESPECIALLY when the misinformation can fit into a punchy soundbyte and the explanation is buried in a 7 hour stream no one watched.

Should probably point out that in a conversation with Vaush regarding the Debate Bro video Noah Samson released, Noah ended up walking back almost every point

I am aware that's Vaush's framing of the situation.

I still think the video makes valuable points, and clearly Noah does stand by the points he made since the video is still up and he made a followup video addressing it and his conversation with Vaush. I actually like the followup video better for explaining some of the concerns I have.

I probably seem defensive, but that's mostly bc I've been watching both the right and leftists that don't like him twist the things he says into absolute pretzels to make him look like a terrible person. Not to say he's never done anything wrong or stupid though.

Here's the thing... When you are not part of the cishet white male majority, then everything you do is scrutinized and picked apart. You are never, ever just representing yourself or your own views. If a gay man does something bad then the cishet white male hegemony will use it as an excuse to say all gay men are bad. Everyone who is part of a marginalized group has experienced this to some degree.

The way Vaush is getting picked apart is the way everyone from marginalized groups is picked apart constantly.

If an ally represents us poorly, then that is going to be far worse for us than it is for the ally. Vaush got some backlash for his ironic misogyny thing, but ultimately the people most hurt by it were women and trans folk, because the right pointed to that and said "SEE we told you! This is why you shouldn't listen to the left about these issues!"

That's why when someone purports to represent us we are going to hold them to a standard that is as high (if not higher) than the standard we ourselves are held to. Because their missteps will result in consequences for us. And unlike cishet white male allies, we can't just walk away from those consequences if it gets uncomfortable for us.

[bringinbackpod]

We had the pleasure of interviewing BEGINNERS over Zoom video! Difficult times can make or break people. As a society, we've been going through doomsday fatigue, whether since the pandemic started, the Trump administration took office, or before that even. Some people have been struggling more than others for a long time. On top of it all, the rent is too damn high, our rights are falling away, the world is on fire (literally and figuratively), and it feels like everything is entirely out of control. The tiniest thing could be that last straw that separates any of us from our sanity. For BEGINNERS, the alt-pop project of L.A.-based Samantha Barbera, one way to deal with those feelings of despair made itself abundantly clear: say f*ck it. The extra indignant sting on top of everything inspired almost a superhero origin story, whether she's the hero or an agent of chaos to be seen. In addition to all that, Barbera went through a breakup during what felt like the implosion of the world we'd known while watching her rights as a queer woman shrink. Instead of imploding, she got into the studio. And that's how BEGINNERS' If the World Is Ending EP was conceived: as an explosion. Barbera is always writing songs, and putting this record together came after a steady stream of collaborations in studios all over the West Coast. The lead single, "I Hate That I Love Brooklyn," is a raucous anthem full of spikey punk rock guitar that represents the spikey feeling of a toxic relationship—with a person, with the news, with a whole damn city or country. The song started with a hat. No, literally. Producer/Artist and frequent collaborator Matias Mora (K. Flay, Broods, Birds of Prey: And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn,) had a blinged-out hat with the word Brooklyn on it and convinced everyone that it had to be where the song was set. For Barbera, collaboration is the key to success. She co-produced and co-wrote all of the songs, but those intimate moments of sharing her personal stories with her collaborators helped tap into a sense of connection that brings her art to life. Over eight months, the World is Ending EP was written and recorded in various home studios. BEGINNERS is a DIY project with punk roots spanning multiple scenes and genres. It has always been fully independent with no record label or advances, but with those all-important master rights and creative control. The project has seen massive success in the world of music syncs. Disney used the song "Start a Riot" in the trailer for the 2021animated feature Raya and the Last Dragon. It promoted outreach and interest from new fans worldwide who searched the song on the internet and commented en masse. Apple also tapped BEGINNERS for three ad campaigns, and New Balance had the band perform in a commercial alongside a slew of famous women Olympic athletes. The music has also been played in ads from Target, Samsung, and Adobe, plus in numerous shows including The Walking Dead, The L Word, and the Netflix series Money Heist and Elite. In Netflix’s Sex/Life, the band got a name drop and a full, two-minute-long dance scene—an unheard-of placement. We want to hear from you! Please email Tera@BringinitBackwards.com . www.BringinitBackwards.com #podcast #interview #bringinbackpod #BEGINNERS #TheWoldIsEndingEP #NewMusic #zoom Listen & Subscribe to BiB https://www.bringinitbackwards.com/follow/ Follow our podcast on Instagram and Twitter! https://www.facebook.com/groups/bringinbackpod

[earthstellar]

The Cybertronian Class System in Transformers Prime

We know very well about the class system in IDW Transformers and how that contributed to the societal tensions that led to the rise of the Decepticon movement, but what about the Aligned Continuity? 

Novel: Exodus 

We know there is a dual caste and guild system in place. 

The caste system referenced in Exodus is directly stated to be determined through a process in which a new spark is encouraged to take its most natural alt-mode form as soon as it is able. The alt-mode is then used to rank them in society. 

Guilds are less well defined, but appear to be structured around further classification of bots by their relative position within their caste. 

The scientific/academic guilds are stated to be of a very high rank, whereas labourers and manual workers are towards the lowest rank. 

There isn’t much more detail than that, so that is almost all of the information we have to work off of in terms of the TFP Cybertronian social structure.

However, it is worth noting that Functionism in the IDW Transformers comics was developed prior to TFP’s writing, and TFP borrowed the concept of alt-mode determination from the comics. So we can assume that many elements of Functionism are shared one to one between these continuities, although the Functionist Council does not exist in the Aligned Continuity. 

Interestingly, Megatron and the beginning of his social revolutionary efforts are based around the same similar initial core beliefs in both IDW and TFP:

I talk more about how class differences between Orion Pax and Megatronus are largely what caused the war in TFP in this post. 

TFP: Deus Ex Machina 

The episode opens with Miko in trouble at school, when she is picked up by Bulkhead after detention is over. He takes her back to base, and they have a discussion about Miko’s future.

Here’s the relevant dialogue: 

Bulkhead: “Look, Miko. Before I became a warrior, I was a labourer. Construction. I can build stuff, I can break stuff. And that’s it!”

Miko: “I love breaking stuff! I wanna be just like you, Bulk.”

Bulkhead: “Ugh... Why would you wanna be like me, when you could be a... A medic, like Ratchet!”

Two things here stick out to me, the first being that Bulkhead thinks very little of himself, and has class related trauma that likely resulted in his generally low self-esteem. He always claims he isn’t smart, isn’t clever, and so on. But building and construction takes significant skill and knowledge on a material and conceptual level. 

The second thing is that he immediately jumps to using Ratchet as an example of what Miko should aspire to be. Ratchet, of course, is a medic-- Remember the guild system in TFP, where scientific class bots were deemed amongst the highest in social capital and relative value. 

The Wreckers and the Class System

I get the feeling this is why Wheeljack doesn’t like Ratchet very much (at least at first), and why Wheeljack resists Ultra Magnus outright. They are both higher class/upper guild bots who would have been a part of the system that likely kept Wheeljack down. 

We don’t know what Wheeljack’s background is in TFP, other than the fact that he’s a Wrecker, but I get the feeling that the reason why he’s not first and foremost a scientist/engineer in this continuity is because he was likely prevented from joining the scientific guild because he was ranked into a lower class due to his natural alt-mode. 

There’s nothing that supports that in canon, but it makes a lot of sense. 

We also know that Bulkhead and Breakdown know each other, and we don’t have all the details there, but it seems likely their relationship to each other may pre-date the factional divide and they may have been from the same class/caste or guild. 

TFP: One Shall Fall 

The episode opens with the kids erasing photos of Bumblebee from the internet; Infamously, this leads to Jack asking Optimus if he wants to see the cat gif that made Ratchet laugh, to which Optimus replies with a flat no. 

This leads Ratchet to mention that Optimus wasn’t always like this, and he was very different before becoming a Prime, leading to the following dialogue: 

Raf: “Optimus wasn’t always a Prime?”

Ratchet: “On Cybertron, one isn’t born into greatness; Rather, one must earn it.”

I think it’s interesting that as he says this, he takes the posture above: Looking up, even though the kids are all far below his line of sight and off to the opposite side of his gaze here. Like he’s repeating it from memory. And that’s possibly exactly what this is; He’s repeating what he was always told. 

Of course, that statement contradicts nearly everything we know to be factual about Cybertronian culture, but it makes sense from Ratchet’s point of view.

We know Ratchet is old, walked across the Cybertronian continent to reach Iacon to study and train as a medic under Remedy, who was the CMO in Iacon at that time. 

Ratchet, while his spark originated in an undeveloped village, had to travel and work hard to become a medic. 

What he doesn’t seem to grasp, is that he’s quite possibly old enough to pre-date the caste and guild system on Cybertron. 

While we don’t have any definite dates, we do have eras for Cybertronian civilisation which I explore further in this post, and it is entirely possible Ratchet simply became a medic before he would have been defined by his alt-mode. Or perhaps his alt-mode was always some kind of Cybertronian ambulance, and it didn’t make any difference in his case because he wanted to become a medic anyway. 

It’s easy to see why his attitude might grate on bots like Wheeljack or Bulkhead; He’s either very old or very lucky or both, and while from his own POV he did have to earn his place to study in Iacon by way of having to get there first and prove his potential, that is a very far cry from experiencing systemic oppression. 

In Pre-War Cybertron, Ratchet had social privilege above every other Autobot we see in TFP.

I think in light of that, it’s very interesting that he yearns for Cybertron so severely. We know Ratchet cares about others and would not have supported the Functionist society if only because he feels all bots should have equal access to healthcare and a right to be well. 

But we also know he wants Cybertron restored, so much so that the destruction of the Omega Lock nearly causes him to collapse. (I might talk about that scene in a future post, too.) 

What we don’t know, is what Ratchet’s vision for an idealised, restored Post-War Cybertron actually is. 

Do I think Ratchet is a Functionist? No. He cares about his people, and believes in the Autobot key tenant that all bots are autonomous and should have the right to individual choice. (Something Megatron also believes, or believed in the beginning-- He is the one who first put the thought into Orion Pax’s mind.) 

But do I think that Ratchet has been heavily indoctrinated by Functionist beliefs due to his long-standing high ranking position in an intensely classist society? Yes. And I think he’s repeating something that used to be said in his pre-war social circle in the scene above, because surely, he knows better. 

[myfavoriteficss]

Marvel Angst Masterlist

This Masterlist includes all of the Marvel angst I have reblogged. The angst will range from very light to heavy depending on the fic. Enjoy.

Updated: 07/17/2021

Marvel Masterlist's

Masterpost

KEY:

Genre: (F) = Fluff, (A) = Angst, (D) = Dark, (J) = Jealousy, (V) = Violence, (H/C) = Hurt and/or Comfort

Trope: (ER) = Established Relationship, (EL) = Enemies to Lovers, (FL) = Friends to Lovers, (FE) = Frenemies, (FD) = Fake Dating, (F/B) = Friends with Benefits, (BU) = Breakup/Already Broken Up, ( C) = Cheating, (UL) = Unrequited Love, (SB) = Slow Burn, (P) = Pregnancy, (BS) = Bed Sharing, (SR) = Super Reader

Type: (AU) = Alternate Universe, (18+) = Mature/NSFW, (HC) = Headcanon

1. Wanda Maximoff

Written by: @aaron-despair

Not your fault (ER, F, A)

Written by: @abimess

It only takes the holidays (AU, A, F): (1) It only takes a commercial - (2) It only takes a pothole - (3) It only takes a lunch - (4) It only takes a party - (5) It only takes a Christmas tree - (6) - It only takes an unexpected visit - (7) It only takes a weird noise - (8) It only takes a fund-raising event - (9) It only takes a starry sky - (10) It only takes a Christmas gift - (11) It only takes a decision - (Epilogue) It only takes a deed

Too familiar, too hurtful (EL, A, F)

Marry me (A, F)

Written by: @aestethick​

Roses (A)

Written by: @allyouthought​

always (F, A)

Written by: @aphrodite-made-me-write-it

Cast A Spell (On You) (AU, A) 

Written by: @badgerfic

the serum (A, V): Part 1

Written by: @buckyssoldat

(UL, A) (1) Not in that way - (2) Gone

Written by: @c-is-writing

gaze into my mind (A, F) 

good enough (A, F) 

Written by: @cantcontroltheirfear​

Odds (AU, A): (1) Another One - (2) I’m Ready - (3) Bar With No Name - (4) That Much Is True - (5) Still - (6) Second to Last Last - (7) Even

Written by: @captainhotch

Cat and Mouse (A) 

Written by: @certifiedskywalker​

Waiting for Home (A) 

Written by: @dancing-the-hellfire-rumba

Je Te Laisserai De Mots (A) 

Written by: @delfiore​

i sunk in all the memories (A) 

better than losing you (ER, A) 

Written by: @desparadowrites

The Very Awful Not Good Bad Day (SR, A) 

Written by: @empyreanwritings

Almost Lost You (FL, A, F) 

Written by: @fallinforevans

you have me (FL, A, F) 

Written by: @forever-your-soldat

(ER, A) (1) Too Much - (2) Her Love 

I Can’t Hurt You (A, V) 

Written by: @frostedfaves

All Too Well (ER, A) 

Written by: @harringtons-imagines

Monster (A, F) 

Written by: @helloalycia

just a kid (ER, A, V, D): [one] - [two]

Written by: @hiiraya

(A, F) (1) one last dance (rewrite) - (2) one last chance (rewrite) - (3) with you

loving you had consequences (rewrite) (BU, A) 

you are my sunshine (rewrite) (A)

Written by: @jabbagabba

La La Land (A): Prologue

Written by: @jbbarnesnnoble

(ER, C, A) (1) Out of Everyone Else - (2) It's Me You're Gonna Miss

Written by: @kingsmanandqueens

Winsome Enigma (A, F) 

Written by: @lesbian-lilo​

Mission Mishaps (H/C, F, A) 

Written by: @lowkeyerror

I Have To See Her Again (A, V)

Written by: @m-lesmxrales

Safe & Sound (ER, A) 

Written by: @marvel-wlw

Somewhere to Run (A) 

Written by: @marvels-writings

Broken Sense (UL, A) 

Dreams that Come True (F, A) 

Always Safe (A) 

Scared (A, F) 

Hurting You (A, F) 

Wanted More (ER, C, A) 

Written by: @marvelsdc22

What We Thought We Lost (AU, FL, A, F): Part 1 - Part 2

Written by: @may-fanfic​

I Just Want You (A, F) 

Written by: @mcuwritin​

Mission gone wrong (A): Part I - Part II

Frenemies? (FE, A, F): Part I - Part II

Written by: @missmonsters2

About You (A): Part I - Part II - Part III - Part IV - Part V - Part VI - Part VII - Part VIII - Part IX - Part X

(ER, A) (1) Under the Light - (2) You Found Me

Find Your Way (BU, A) 

Last the Night (ER, C, A) 

Written by: @mymymarvel

Never Is Enough (A) 

Written by: @nermalina

so in love. (A, F) 

Written by: @nervoustrack

We're out in the open sea (A)

Written by: @nothingbutimagines

Last Christmas (UL, A, F) 

Written by: @procrastinatingsapphictrash

The pact (FL, F, A) 

Written by: @queenxxxsupreme

1950 (A) 

Written by: @randomshyperson

Sorry for your loss (FL, A, F): (1) I will grieve - (2) I will try - (3) I will get better. - (4) I will move on - (5) I will love again (18+)

The Scarlet Witch Prophecy (AU, FL, F, A): (1) The First Year - (2) The Second Year - (3) The Third Year - (4) The Fourth Year (Part I) - (5) The Fourth Year (Part II) - (6) The Fourth Year (Final Part) - (7) The Fifth Year (Part One) - (8) The Fifth Year (Part Two) - (9) The Fifth Year (Part Three)

Left Behind (FL, A, V, F): (1) Muddy Waters - (2) R.I.P to My Youth - (3) No Time to Die - (4) Save Me - (5) Someone You Loved - (6) Once a Promise, Always a Promise. - (7) Start a Riot - (8) Fine Line - (9) Please Notice - (10) Atlantis

Road to Healing (FL, A, F, 18+)

Drivers License (AU, FL, F, A)

The One (AU, A, F)

Written by: @rebeliz777

August (C, F/B, A): Part I (18+) - Part II (18+) - Part III

Again (A) 

Crumbling down (A)

Written by: @reminiscingtonight

(BU, A) (1) Better By Now - (2) Run Into You - (3) Still the Same

(FL, A) (1) Through The Dark - (2) If I Fall - (3) Breaking Point

(ER, A) (1) Cellophane - (2) Apologies

(AU, ER, A) (1) Break My Heart Again - (2) Burn It All Down

(FL, A, F) (1) Last Kiss - (2) All I Know - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - (6) Breathe (It’s Out Of My Hands)

A Different Corner (A) 

Need You Now (A)

Let’s Hurt Tonight (ER, A)

Ghost of You (A)

Lego House (AU, FL, A, F)

Not Ready For Goodbyes (ER, A, F)

Hold On (ER, A)

Twilight Time (ER, F, A)

Feel It Twice (A)

I’ll Never Love Again (A)

Written by: @rogue-barnes-16

I’m A Monster (FL, A, F) 

Written by: @saintprinsessa​

Feeling You (A) 

Written by: @sapphicshots

to grow old in (ER, A, F) 

falling (FL, A, F) 

Written by: @shesaidnomaam

Witch & Wound (A, F): Part 1 - Part 2

Two A.M, Two Bottles In (A) 

Written by: @somewhatgreatexpectations

Love Goes (FL, C, BU, A, F): (1) Latch - (2) One Day at a Time - (3) Fire on Fire - (4) Like I Can - (5) Breaking Hearts - (6) Another One - (7) Palace - (8) Writing’s On The Wall - (9) For The Lover That I Lost - (10) Leave Your Lover - (11) Nirvana - (12) Lay Me Down - (13) To Die For

Love Me (Or Let Me Go) (AU, A, F): (1) Leave, Then Go - (2) If you need me, let me know - (3) Walk Away - (4) In the Middle - (5) Love Me, or Let Me Go - (6) Don't Go - (7) Separate Ways - (8) Set You Free - (Alt. Ending) Home

Written by: @spoopy-imagines-writer

Behind These Hazel Eyes (A) 

Written by: @starshipsofstarlord

Two Beds, One Home (A, F) 

Testing. Testing. (A) 

Written by: @subtlebucky

she lives in daydreams with me (A, F) 

Written by: @thenatashamaximoff

Dangerous Love (C, BU, A, V, SR): Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9 - Chapter 10 - Epilogue

Broken Love (C, A): Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4

Written by: @thewitchandtheassassin

Guilt is an Ugly Mistress (ER, A) 

Of Love and Of Loss (ER, A) 

Written by: @waiting4inspiration

Why? (A, F) 

Written by: @wandaownsthisass

If You Need Me (A) 

Written by: @wandaromanova​

Should’ve Been You (ER, A) 

Written by: @wandsolsen​

Champagne Problems (ER, A) 

Written by: @wellsayhelloaagin​

Cross My Heart (ER, A): Part 1 - Part 2

Written by: @wokeupinawalnut

(ER, BU, A) (1) Six Degrees Of Separation - (2) Wherever This Goes

Save The Best For Last (FL, A, F) 

Written by: @young-and-bitchy (deactivated)

Here You Come Again (BU, A) 

Written by: @8plasma

children of tragedy (A): [part 1] - [part 2]

2. Natasha Romanoff

Written by: @aestethick

Last Kiss (A): Part 1 - Part 2

Written by: @allfiguredout

Home (A) 

Written by: @aphrodite-made-me-write-it

To Mend (A, F) 

Written by: @c-is-writing

untangled (F, A) 

Written by: @crimsonspy

Don’t shut me out (FL, SB, A, F) 

Written by: @demxters

bluebird (A) 

Written by: @femreader

Don’t Go (H/C, A) 

Written by: @higherfurther-romanova

Then Finish It (A, V, D): Part 1

Written by: @hiiraya

(A) (1) didn't know what I had - (2) you were good to me - (3) what I want

closure (A) 

Written by: @jbbarnesandnoble

Rainy Season (A)

When We Were Young and Naive (AU, A) 

Written by: @jumbojamba47

Guest Room (A) 

Written by: @lesbian-deadpool

New Surroundings (A): (1) Glad You Are Back - (2) Glad To Be Home

(A, F) (1) We Were On A Break! - (2) I’ll Be Home For Christmas

A Fresh Start (A, F) 

Written by: @lilxberry

I Watched You Die (A): Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3

Written by: @lndlover

Somebody else (C, A) 

Written by: @lonelyandlovelorn

Loophole (F, A) 

Written by: @marvels-writings

(ER, C, BU, A) (1) Used To - (2) World Turned Upside Down - (3) My Forever

Not Meant to Be (A) 

A Reason to Leave, a Reason to Stay (A, F) 

Perfect (A, F) 

Past Come to Life (A, F) 

Piece of Your Heart (A, F) 

Make it Right (ER, A) 

Can’t You Tell? (A) 

Written by: @marvelouslytrekking

Finding You (A, V) 

Written by: @marvelsbanner

Someone to You (A, F) 

Written by: @may-fanfic

Because I love you (A, V): Part 1 - Part 2

Written by: @missmonsters2

Lead Me Astray (ER, A) 

Leave Me Lonely (ER, A) 

Stars Falling (A, F) 

Written by: @natasha-danvers

Oh (A, F): Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7

Longing (A): Part 1

Written by: @pietrosgf

the sweet escape (A): (1) what died didn’t stay dead - (2) you’re alive in my head

Written by: @pigeonp0st

Natasha Romanoff x Reader #2 (A): Part 1 - Part 2

Written by: @procrastinatingsapphictrash

Can’t get over her (A, F) 

The rest of my life (A, F) 

A little help from the team (A, F) 

Doubt (A, F) 

Drunken confessions (A, F) 

Written by: @quickpiet

Walk it off (A, F) 

Written by: @rebeliz777

You saved me (A) 

Written by: @roger-that-cap

(ER, C, A) (1) cardigan - (2) tolerate it

peace (A, F) 

Written by: @romanoffswifey

Point Blank (A): Part 1 - Part 2

Written by: @saltybaltic

Come Back To Me (A, F) 

Written by: @sapphicshots

i can’t live without you (A, F) 

Written by: @satxnsupreme​

Welcome home (A) 

Written by: @shesaidnomaam

Natasha x Reader (A): Part 1

Written by: @startrekkingaroundasgard

“I didn’t mean it.” (A, F) 

Written by: @thenatashamaximoff

Dangerous Love (C, BU, A, V, SR): Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9 - Chapter 10 - Epilogue

Broken Love (C, A): Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4

Written by: @thewitchandtheassassin​

All That Matters (A, F) 

Written by: @vanillann

real or not real? (A) 

Written by: @vulpe-fox

Seeing You (A) 

Written by: @wandavixen

Hurt (A) 

Written by: @wannabe-fic-writer

Old But New (A, F) 

Fed Up (A) 

Written by: @wildhoney323

Moving On (C, A, F) 

Written by: @winedrunkbarnes

Roses and Regrets (A, F) 

Written by: @wisewidow

Gunshot Roses (A) 

Written by: @wokeupinawalnut

(ER, BU, A) (1) Talks That Break Hearts - (2) Talks That Mend Hearts

Written by: @yourmcu

Bloodlust (A, F, V)

3. Carol Danvers

Written by: @hiiraya

stay a little longer (rewrite)

the one (that got away) (rewrite)

get well soon (rewrite)

until the end

Written by: @missmonsters2

Move Me Along

Written by: @wlw-imagines-blog

We Don’t Talk About It

4. Yelena Belova

Written by: @a-simple-imagine

Left Behind

Written by: @empyreanwritings

Old Habits Die Hard

Written by: @marvels-writings

Stay

Written by: @nermalina

mild interference.

Written by: @rogue-barnes-16

Braids

МОЯ ЛЮБОВЬ

Written by: @thewitchandtheassassin

Promises

5. Michelle Jones (MJ)

Written by: @borntobewondering

& Ever

Written by: @heckin-good-holland

In Her Arms

Written by: @leiasfanaccount648

Good Times

Written by: @sensestinging

Curious - Unfolding

[phoukanamedpookie]

Unpopular opinion: Kylo Ren would've been a more compelling villain if the writers leaned into the White Male Rage(TM) aspect of his character.

I've said before that Kylo Ren reminds me of all those white guys with AR-15s on the news who turned to mass murder to work out their issues with people "inferior" to them, not to mention the song and dance that always happens in the aftermath.

One question that always gets asked is some variation of: How can a kid from such a good family turn bad?

In making Kylo Ren's fall to the Dark Side all about his personal beef with Luke, the sequel trilogy missed out on being a reflection on the rise of the alt-right and the type of people its ideologies appeal to.

How does a kid from a family of heroes become a villain?

It's highly conceivable that, throughout Ben Solo's childhood and adolescence, he was taught (if not outright told) that he was born more special than anyone else and that he has a special destiny because of who he's related to. You can imagine how that would feed a massive sense of entitlement. Why shouldn't he impose his will on others? Don't you know who his father/mother/uncle/grandfather is? You can imagine how that leads to acts of extreme acts of rage and violence when he doesn't get his way. Why shouldn't he destroy anyone who gets in his way? Compared to him, they don't really matter.

Snoke wasn't even necessary! This is a guy who found a Sith holocron without Snoke's help. He has the drive and resources to seek out knowledge that would make him more powerful in the Dark Side of the Force. Kylo Ren didn't need anyone pulling his strings. The sequel trilogy should've gone with the oldest character flaw in the book: hubris. Pure, unadulterated, textbook hubris.

That's why it would've been important that the people who resist and finally defeat him are "nobodies" like Finn and Rey. The Force is accessible to anyone, not just special people with special bloodlines. That would've been a helluva message to send in 2015-2019, especially with the rise of white nationalism in the US and elsewhere.

So what about the Knights of Ren and breaking Luke's spirit?

Luke almost attacking Ben Solo because of a vision of a possible future felt weird and out of place. It came off as, "We have to invent conflict for plot reasons."

If TLJ was more interested in fleshing out these characters and relationships than rushing from one plot point to the next, we could've gotten something more substantial to explain why Ben Solo fell to the Dark Side.

I wouldn't make it about one incident, but a gradual slide that happens almost without notice. First of all, it'd serve as a reminder about how insidious the Dark Side is, how easy it is to fall more and more out of balance with the Force if you're not paying attention. How easy it is to be seduced toward the Dark Side of the Force if when, as Yoda says, your mind is not on where you are and what you're doing.

Ben Solo's fall should not be about Luke's moment of weakness, but his own. Maybe Luke has to go somewhere for a diplomatic New Republic thing, leaving Ben in charge while he's away. Perhaps one of the students challenges his authority, and Ben reacts by Force-choking that student. The others might try to make him stop, but in his rage, he turns on them. They try to defend themselves, but they're no match for him.

Sensing a disturbance in the Force, Luke rushes back to find his school destroyed and students slaughtered. But Ben's still there. They face off. Luke manages to keep Ben at bay, but he can't bring himself to hurt him. He subdues Ben long enough to get away and goes into exile. That's how we get grumpy!Luke.

That's just what I would've worked better, though.

[sentinelpri]

Evergreen Wasn’t Such A Bad Dream

Sheets of snow coated the ground outside as Starscream sat in the rocking chair by the window, bitterly watching the falling flakes.

If the heat in his gaze were to manifest physically, the snow would be melted and he’d be able to leave, but, of course, he was never that lucky, and he was now trapped inside of the Autobot base disgusting warehouse with no other than Optimus Prime during a snowstorm. 

“Where’s the rest of your team?”

“They got caught in the blizzard, but found shelter at a hotel nearby. They’ll stay there until the snow dies down enough for them to get back safely in... It’ll be a few days. Don’t tell me you’re concerned? You might just be redeemable after all.”

“Don’t test me.”

It was his own fault. He knew that, and he felt increasingly uncomfortable with each second that passed because of the fact. He was purposefully ignoring Optimus- the puny Autobot’s stare to avoid having to look at those familiar yet unsettlingly prying sky blue optics. 

“Are you going to tell me why you were outside our base for the fourth time this week?”

Starscream’s mouth went dry. Unable to conceal his shock, he looked straight at Optimus, thin lip plates parting in a silent gasp. It was true; he had been lurking outside of the weird looking warehouse that Team Prime was staying at, but he felt that his reasons were justified.

The Autobots patrolled almost every single night, all stationed around various areas of Detroit, looking for Decepticons. Most of the time, Optimus was the one to lead these charges, but over the past few months, he hadn’t been there- not in any of the battles or the patrols, all of which Starscream was either directly involved in or spied on in the background.

So, Starscream decided he was going to look into it. He waited for the patrol times to roll around that week, waited for Optimus to start making it clear that he wasn’t going to go on patrol with his friends because he had ‘on-base security matters to attend to’, and when he realized that Optimus was indeed locking himself up at the Autobot base, he went, too; followed the red and blue bot until he found the warehouse he’d been staying at. He’d been trying to figure out exactly what Optimus was doing there for the past few months, staying in the forest nearby and occasionally coming to the building in an attempt to piece the story together.

...But then, he’d been caught. To make a long story short, he’d been outside the base again, only to realize that 1) it had started snowing, 2) the snow was quickly becoming a blizzard and there was no way he was getting back to the Decepticon base on stabilizing servo or by alt mode safely, and 3) Optimus Prime had seen him through the windows and was coming outside to get him.

That was how he’d ended up being ushered inside, sat in the wooden rocking chair by the window (surprisingly, large enough to hold him- must’ve been custom built), and given not only a piping hot cup of hot energon topped with matching candies and whipped cream but also a heated fluffy blanket that had been oh-so-tenderly draped over his shoulder plates- and that was how he ended up like this, not even able to deny his actions or able to make excuses for himself.

“You knew?”

And he blew his cover. Didn’t even try to hide it. Lovely. That always seemed to happen around Optimus Prime. It was like no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t hide in the way he could with everyone else. It wasn’t that the Autobot saw right through him, either- no, it was that Optimus had a very open, welcoming, inviting presence- the kind of presence that made Starscream want to lay in the space bridge technician’s strong arms and tell him every secret he’d ever kept, every lie he’d ever told. 

Upon realizing that he’d given himself away more than he’d intended to, he went back to watching the snow fall. The metal underneath his claws was burning white from the strength he was using to grip the mug of hot energon- that of which had actually turned to lukewarm energon due to how long he’d been sitting there holding it.

“Of course. Did you think I wouldn’t know? You’re not exactly subtle.”

“Well, I-” The grey and magenta bot felt his cheeks burn red as his optics flickered to meet Optimus’s and then back to the snow storm. He set the mug down on the side table to his left and crossed his arms. “Shut your trap, Autobot.”

Optimus raised an optical ridge at him and crossed his arms.

“You don’t need to be defensive about it, Decepticon-”

“Starscream. I prefer you call me Starscream,” The seeker corrected him gently, only realizing his mistake after it had already been made. 

Optimus blinked, and whether it was because of the sudden gentleness of Starscream’s tone or the implication that the Decepticon wanted to be called by his actual name, he wasn’t quite sure. 

“What?” 

“Never mind,” He spat.

“Please, just tell me why you’re here,” Optimus, who had been pacing around the living room since he’d dragged Starscream in a good half hour ago, stopped to stand in front of where the older mech was sitting in his rocking chair and pleaded. “Starscream.”

“Why are you here?”

“Don’t try to turn this around on me. You’re the one who followed me here. Had you even been here before you started this whole thing? Where did you tell the other Decepticons you were at? From my understanding, Megatron keeps you under constant surveillance to stop your schemes.”

“...No one cares enough to ask,” Starscream muttered. 

“Why didn’t you just use your alt mode to get back to wherever you’ve been staying?”

“Seriously? My alt mode isn’t built for this disgusting organic weather, you insolent fool. I was trapped against my own will out there.”

The room went silent for just a moment. The lights were off, but the brick fireplace lit the room with its gentle glow. Starscream strained his audials to hear the crackling of that fire and the sound of the wind blowing outside- just to have something to focus on that wasn’t the sound of his own spark beating so fast that it felt like it could come out of its chamber. 

“Right,” Optimus spoke softly and ran a servo over the top of his helm. “Are you going to tell me why you’re here now?”

The tension that had been compounding in the room for the past half hour boiled up and manifested in Starscream’s throat. Tears of frustration welled up in his cherry optics, and though he tried to swallow them, he found that there was a lump of anxiety that he couldn’t quite get down. 

“I can leave-” It was too much for him to handle, so he found himself pulling the blanket off of his shoulders, setting it on the back of the chair, and standing up abruptly enough to make the rocking chair move back with a deafening squeak.

“Don’t, and sit back down,” Optimus objected, clasping a servo around one of the Decepticon’s wrists and taking a step towards him. Starscream couldn’t help but notice how hot the younger mech’s digits were compared to his, and he couldn’t help but want to feel more than just those calloused digits around him; he wanted to feel those digits on his face and on his neck, wanted to feel Optimus’s chest pressed against his, wanted to feel their legs and other more promiscuous things tangled up together. Before he could delve too deep into that train of thought, the smaller mech was gently pushing him back into the rocking chair and pulling the blanket back over his shoulders. He blinked at the sight of Optimus bending down and leaning forward a bit to look him in the optic. “You’re still freezing.”

“Stop coddling me, Autobot,” He scoffed, trying to ignore the fact that he was already missing the feeling of Optimus’s metal on his. 

“Call me by my first name if you want me to call you by yours,” The words fell from in between Optimus’s plump lips in a hushed tone, emphasizing just how forbidden something as intimate as that between the two of them felt. 

“...Optimus,” Starscream whispered back. He couldn’t help but notice that Optimus was still leaning ridiculously close to him. He could’ve moved back- there was plenty of room in the rocking chair for him to do so- but he didn’t. Instead, he stayed still and waited for something to happen. “What is this?”

The firelit room seemed to highlight Optimus’s everything just right; the tenderness in his gaze, the cool blue of his glowing optics, the apex of his cheeks, every dip and groove on the faceplate that Starscream had fallen in love with such a short time ago when they met on earth, but it felt like such a long time ago now. Just a few nanokliks ago, it seemed like they were meeting on earth, and yet... It had been a while of them dancing around each other, bantering but never causing any harm to each other during battle, and avoiding whatever their feelings were. Even now, Optimus, who should’ve put him in stasis cuffs and commed the Elite Guard, was treating him with such care since no one was around to put up an act for.

“You tell me, Starscream,” Optimus murmured with a delicate tilt of his head. His large audial fins pointed up a bit and twitched, almost like they were alert, and if not for the tension flooding the room right now, Starscream would’ve teased the Autobot about it. “What is this?”

“A fragging disaster is what it is,” He hissed, averting his gaze. “This is what I get for allowing myself to worry about you.”

“So... That’s why you followed me, then? You worry for me?”

Optimus’s tone was kind and understanding as it usually was, a trait that Starscream could throttle the younger mech for possessing. Those calloused servos were on his knees now, soothingly running up and down the length of his long legs and thin thighs in a way that he found surprisingly soothing. It warmed him up, as did the blanket and the fire. He set the mug down on the table next to him.

“Why else would I do it? ...Of course I worry for you. There’s never been a time where I haven’t.”

“I had no idea,” Optimus stated in a blunt manner, as if it were obvious, and then shrugged. “You’re an enigma. I’m surprised you didn’t disparate on the spot when I saw you out there.”

“I didn’t want to risk anyone seeing me do it… Running away, I mean, and it’s not like I could’ve transformed and flown away given the weather. You know how both of our teams can be.”

“Bullshit,” Optimus scoffed and rolled his optics with a small laugh. “Your pride is stronger than that… At least when it comes to us. You could’ve willed your way away from me and out of that blizzard if you really wanted to.”

“Fine, then,” Starscream turned his head away and tiled it up. Arms crossed, optics closed, he felt compelled to confess that yes, at the end of this, he had wanted to have sort of interaction with Optimus. With the younger mech being gone from their battles for so long, things were different, and he missed him dearly; missed the teasing and the half-hearted fighting, how they always seemed to be saying everything that was unsaid to each other with mere glances. Starscream had fallen for the red and blue bot early on and had never said anything out of some twisted cross between fear and pride, but he was craving Optimus and couldn’t make it go away without at least seeing him. “Part of me wanted you to catch me and bring me in. I wanted to see you. Happy?”

“I would be if you told me why you’re doing all of this. I’m still confused beyond belief.”

“I don’t owe you an explanation.”

“I never said you did, but you do know that you’ve basically been stalking me and are currently taking shelter in my base from the snow storm that’s raging outside right now, correct?”

It was embarrassing. The blizzard part hadn’t exactly been a piece of his plan, nor had the tips of his wings freezing so much that Optimus had to warm them up with his bare servos to keep them from going numb, nor had any of the rest of it except for Optimus seeing him and coming out to interact with him, but it had worked out in its own way.

“...Yes, I’m well aware, thank you,” Starscream mumbled and then gave an indignant huff. 

“So?”

Optimus’s optics were expectant, waiting. Starscream avoided them and pulled the blanket tighter over his shoulders.

“So nothing. You’ve been hiding from your little patrols and missions for months, and as the leader of the pile of scrap metal you call a team, I’m not sure why you’re here instead of with them. I haven’t seen you at all.”

“...It’s nice to get away sometimes. I know you understand how hard it is for...” Optimus trailed off, which pissed Starscream off even more. What was he getting at there, and what did he stop? What was he implying that Starscream knew? “Ah, never mind… It’s easier to tell everyone that I’ve got to guard the base or something every once in a while so I don’t have to deal with everything. I have my own weaknesses just like everyone else, Starscream.”

“You concern me. What weaknesses do you have to hide from them?”

“Why do you care so much?” Optimus challenged. 

“Huh?”

“Why did you care enough to follow me here to find out?”

“Don’t make me say it again,” Starscream found himself staring at a spot on the ground like it was the most interesting thing he’d ever seen when, honestly, the most interesting and gorgeous mech he’d ever seen was right in front of him. “I was worried, alright? And I didn’t know what was going on, but… Ah, never mind.”

“Thank you,” Optimus was standing up straight and leaning forward to drape his arms over Starscream’s shoulders. The seeker tensed, but accepted the affection and bit down a satisfied hum when tender servos were stroking over the tops of his wings. “For coming to check on me. It’s out of character for you.”

“I love you, I can’t help but worry-” Oh, great. The moment he realized it, he panicked and sputtered to correct himself. It was a long-kept secret, and it was kept for a reason because yeah, maybe they were in love or something (or at least Starscream was), but it was meant to be left unspoken. “Wait, frag, no- I mean-!”

“I get it,” Optimus was sinking to his knees between Starscream’s legs and wrapping his arms around the older mech’s waist, burying his helm in Starscream’s stomach. “It’s fine, and it… Makes sense. Why else would you do this with your nights when you could be spending them with literally anyone else?”

“I…”

“I love you, too,” Optimus reassured him and looked up to meet his optics, sky blue burning into cherry red. “And I worry about you just as much as you’ve probably been worrying about me. The main reason I’ve been avoiding patrol is because of how weak I get around you.”

“Truly?” 

Hesitantly, Starscream reached down and allowed his servos to rest on top of Optimus’s helm, careful not to let his claws scratch at the immaculate blue paint job. It was a nice touch, warm and soft, comforting. Everything that Starscream had needed and missed, if he was being honest.

“Yeah… I knew you’d been acting off. I wasn’t sure when the change happened, but it did, and it was like… One day you were normal around me, and the next you weren’t.”

“Right... There’s plenty of time for discussion later, but as you said earlier, I’m still freezing,” With a crooked grin, Starscream opened his arms and found that his spark was beating twice as hard and twice as fast in its chamber when Optimus grinned right back. “And I wouldn’t hate the idea of... Huddling for... Warmth purposes, of course.”

“Of course,” Optimus raised his optical ridge and chuckled before standing yet again. “Strictly for the warmth... I wouldn’t hate that either.”

Within seconds, Optimus was in Starscream’s lap, and the Decepticon was pulling the huge blanket over both of them now to keep them warm. It was peaceful with Optimus draped across his much larger body, face buried in his chest plate and figure curled up to him, blue optics fluttering shut. The red and blue bot quickly fell into a deep recharge with Starscream still holding him like that and looking out the window.

Maybe the blizzard hadn’t been such a bad thing after all.

[gohyuck]

my someone

pairing: jeong yunho x reader

genre: angst to fluff, f2l

warnings: n/a

word count: 1.5k

“you’ve been out here all night.”

you startle, not expecting yunho to come up beside you. he’s smiling at you when you turn to the side, one of his hands wrapped around the balcony railing in front of him. the fairy lights strung up overhead bathe him in light, reflecting off of his all-white suit. your best friend looks almost angelic, and the soft, inquiring gaze he has completes the picture.

“for someone so big, you have, like, crazy light footsteps,” you respond, a corner of your lips pulling up as you turn to face him. “didn’t hear you at all.”

“you’re dodging the question.” yunho slides the hand on the railing towards you slightly, and you can’t help but let your breath hitch once you feel the knuckle of his thumb against the thin cloth of your formalwear. you know he’s just being kind, being genuine as he gets closer to you. perhaps he thinks it’s his duty as your date. maybe he counts it as his duty as your best friend.

“you haven’t even asked a question.” you’re still grinning as you meet his eyes, though you’re sure the ache in your chest is easily seen in your expression, no matter how hard you try to hide it. you don’t even know why you’re indulging yunho right now: he’s always read you so easily. it’s doubly bad now, considering that he’s the reason you’ve spent half your prom night out at the balcony of the hotel floor the school had rented.

he’d seemed so happy, so content talking and laughing with the rest of your friends. yunho’d helped one girl with her hair, pulled another guy closer by the waist as they’d both lost it over a joke mingi’d made about jongho and beating the ever-loving shit out of a watermelon in the name of sport. sure, he’d asked you to be his date (“best friend privileges, am i right?” “whatever. you’re buying me a corsage.”), but he could’ve asked anyone and they would’ve said yes in a heartbeat.

you aren’t special.

“figured the question was implied,” he’s smirking now, though his eyes remain ever-so-slightly concerned. once you don’t respond, only continue to smile detachedly at him, he sighs before wrapping his arms around you entirely and pulling your body into his.

“what’s wrong, moonshine?” yunho murmurs his nickname into your hair, and you can’t help but let a quiet, airy laugh out at it. he’d taken to calling you ‘sunshine’ back in sixth grade until you’d had your emo/alt not-a-phase phase in seventh and told him the name made you feel too nice, and that you weren’t nice, you were edgy, among other things. he’d laughed directly in your face before switching to ‘moonshine’, asking you if that was an edgy enough name.

it’d stuck ever since. he’s stuck ever since. his hand rubs up and down your back now as if to soothe you, and you know he’s aware of how tight your muscles are pulled.

your heart aches. you can’t do this anymore: it’s been years upon years of having yunho as your best friend and nothing more, and you think it’s finally, finally taken a toll on you. the ache is intensified by how sure you are of the fact that he doesn’t love you back: you’ve never had another person to call your own, and yunho’s had plenty. He’s cycled through boyfriend, girlfriend, partner after partner since high school had started, never keeping someone for more than a few months. you’d always watched his relationships fall apart like movie scenes you couldn’t tear your eyes away from. you’d always held him in the aftermath, ever the epitome of a good friend.

“i’ll never find love, will i?” you voice the thought aloud, meeting yunho’s gaze with a strength you’d previously been unaware of. it’s as if your question is a challenge, one he can either meet or deny. maybe you still have a bit of hope left in you.

yunho stares back, albeit more confused - and a little saddened - than he had been seconds prior. he says nothing, and the ray of hope piercing your heart breaks in half, like an arrow being pulled unceremoniously out of a dead warrior.

you’ve had enough. you look away. your head hangs.

it’s only when you can’t see him, can only see the white of his suit that you let all of your thoughts fall out, finally convinced that it - whatever it is - is done.

“i just - i… i’ve never had someone of my own. i mean i know that it’s only senior year, and that i have my life ahead of me, but sometimes it feels like i - it feels like the one person i’ve always loved will never love me back.” you pause in your rambling to take a breath, and yunho mistakes you for finished. he opens his mouth to speak, but you raise a hand to silence him, narrowly missing hitting his nose. you don’t care. you forge on. “he’s always with someone or the other - i mean i guess he isn’t with someone now, or whatever, but - god you won’t get it, because you’re like that, you always have someone. he’s always with everyone but me and it sucks because i love you so fucking much that it physically hurts.”

there’s silence, only your muted breathing, and then, as you register what you’ve said - i love you, instead of i love him - there are tears. he knows. all these years, and now he knows.

you turn away to look over the balcony, suddenly having to work hard to keep yourself from gasping for breath. the ache has not dulled, not in the slightest, but at least the pressure is off your chest. at least its made way for a new kind of weight.

before you can mull over - re: cry over - what’s just happened, a warm hand comes up to cup the side of your face closest to it, a thumb swipes one of your tears away. you can’t help but glance at yunho, expecting to see him crestfallen at the ruination of your friendship.

he’s smiling the biggest smile you’ve ever seen.

“i’ve always had someone, yeah, but that someone’s always been you,” he says, words rushed because he doesn’t want you to cry any harder. “it’s always been you. nobody else has ever stayed because none of them have ever compared to you. i thought - i thought you didn’t want me, so i never even tried.”

his other hand rests gingerly against your waist for a moment before he deems it too awkward, instead sliding his arm around your middle fully before pulling you into him again. yunho’s words are still taking root in your heart, still being processed in your mind, and it’s a moment before you’re crying twice as hard in realization. it’s you for him just as it’s him for you?

“i love you, moonshine, always have.” he cements it before you can ask him too many questions, the words mumbled against your hair as he holds you close. yunho is all around you, enveloping you, and your whirlwind of emotions ends in you feeling very, very safe.

you pull away to take a good look at his smiling face, and he brushes all of your tears away before they can stain your face. his mouth is quirked into a smirk, though it’s softened by how kind his eyes and actions are. you can’t help but give him a watery smile of your own, though you can hardly believe what’s happening.

“i think,” you say, words wavering. his gaze is soft, encouraging, and he waits for you to continue. “i think we should talk it over properly in the car.”

“sure,” your best friend (soon to be boyfriend) replies, leaning in to rest his forehead against yours. it feels right. “we can talk all night long. hell, we might have to talk all night long. for now, though, you owe me a dance, yeah?”

as if the universe is listening, the dance pop song in the background fades out just as yunho finishes his question, transitioning to a slower r&b song. you watch as people filter off the dance floor, only a number of couples remaining as they start slow dancing. yunho steps away from you and holds a hand out, and you don’t hesitate in taking it, eyes dried and smile big as your love pulls you from the balcony and leads you to the dance floor.

you have your first kiss with yunho at prom, colored lights illuminating your faces and smooth rhythms backing crooning vocals as a soundtrack, his arms looped around your waist and your own thrown over his shoulders, his mouths slotting perfectly against yours, and it’s magical. it’s as if everything you’ve never said is behind that kiss, every moment the two of you’ve missed before. it’s beautiful, and wonderful, and, more than anything, it’s truly, truly magical.

it’s magical enough for him to mention it in his wedding vows to you, years upon years later.

[yannadere]

Songbird Soliloquy

daryl dixon x afab!reader who's a musician

summary: y/n is an underground alt musician who uses their music to lure hordes away from the group.

tags: mild songfic, musician!reader, jealousy, pining, cuddles, fluff, injuries, hurt/comfort

((based off of jazmin beans's worldwide torture))

- - ┈┈∘┈˃̶༒˂̶┈∘┈┈ - -

you sit patiently, tuning your guitar and giving it an experimental strum. the sound of your loud instrument alarms most people in the camp, and you smile sheepishly, turning down the built in amp. "y/n-." shane starts, but you cut him off. "relax, it's fine. it was barely loud compared to how loud this baby can get." you grin, continuing your tuning. "okay, just please don't alert every walker for miles to our location." he sighs, and you roll your eyes. "dude, relax. it was barely a strum." you giggle, noticing carl's curious gaze.

"hey, little man. wanna learn one day?" you ask with a smile, and he looks up at lori. "maybe when we're somewhere safer." she nods, smiling. "cool!" carl bounces slightly, clearly excited. "alright, the plan is to move out of atlanta..." rick states, and you nod as the group starts listening. "we're heading to fort benning, georgia. should be safer." rick informs, and the group seem to agree.

"alright, we're heading out asap." rick nods, walking away, lori following. daryl huffs, slumping down onto a chair next to you. "you ever gonna ditch that thing?" he asks, and you shake your head. "never. she's my baby." you grin, sticking your tongue out at him. daryl rolls his eyes and carl beams. "can you play something?" he asks, eyes staring at your guitar. "ahh- i don't think that would be smart..." lori butts in but you give carl a few chords to keep him happy. "not too loud." shane scolds, and you roll your eyes. "c'mon, we've gotta move." rick sighs, closing a car door. "alright. let's go."

the rv comes to a wheezing stop, and you open the door to step out, observing the broken down vehicle next to you. daryl's motorbike passes you and you grin at him as he glances at you. everyone gets out, observing the engine with disappointment. glenn chews his nails anxiously, and you nudge him as you approach him. "relax, dale can fix it." you grin, slinging an arm around his shoulders. "i don't know... it's more duct tape than hose... and i'm out of duct tape." dale huffs, shrugging before crossing his arms in thought.

"surely we could scavenge from these cars..?" you suggest, gesturing to the mass of dead cars down the road. "we can get supplies too..!" glenn nods, but lori doesn't seem happy. "this is a graveyard..." she points out, and you sigh. "lori, we need the stuff in this graveyard to survive." you say, walking away to gather some items. daryl follows you, seemingly agreeing to your statement.

you open a car door, peering inside. "ooh! jackpot!" a toothy grin covers your face as you pull out an unopened bottle of whiskey. daryl smirks at the sight, popping the trunk to check for anything useful. you shrug your backpack off to put the whiskey away when a noise catches your attention. a walker gurgles, trying to crawl towards you. you roll your eyes, grumbling about the 'ankle biter' before stomping on it's head with your heavy platform boots.

"they do some good damage?" daryl passes by you, moving on to another car near where t-dog was scavenging gas. "of course they do. i'm the one wearing them." you reply cheekily, adjusting your guitar strap idly. daryl huffs out a laugh, already searching through another car. "don't blow your ego up." he teases, and you chuckle, bumping him when you pass. another zombie catches your gaze in the distance, sluggishly trudging between cars. rick seems to spot it too, aiming but freezing as more seem to pop up. "daryl, look at this shit." you hiss, grabbing his vest roughly to point him in the direction of the approaching horde.

"holy shit..." daryl moves on quickly, going to pull you with him. "hold on, i can lead them away." you say, grabbing your guitar strap. "are you crazy?!" he snaps, going to grab your wrist. "absolutely." you grin, running towards the horde. you couldn't let anyone get hurt, there were kids in this camp. you had already witnessed so much death, feeling useless as you normally held no weapons other than your pocket knife. "this time, i'm gonna be the hero." you nod, ignoring everyone warning you as you vault over the barrier to sneak past.

you had your target, clambering upon the truck and turning up your guitar to max. you give the strings a harsh strum, happy with the tuning. slowly, the undead turn to you, and you grin. "come on, come get some." you whisper under your breath, starting up gently with a few notes. as the crowd slowly turns to you. eventually, as they start approaching you, you turn up your theme, playing your song adeptly. everyone comes out of hiding one by one to watch you, clearly shocked by your confidence.

carl seems to light up as you play your song, having to yell your lyrics so it would be heard over your guitar's loudness. shane and rick quickly gather the group, moving them back so no one would get hurt if a stray zombie wandered off, yet it seemed they all wanted you. the truck rocks slightly as they bang and press on it, yet you keep your balance.

"i'll be chewing on your face and knocking down your door-" you regain balance as the truck wobbles dangerously, glancing around for another safe car. a van was your best bet in case the truck went, but you had to wait for the rest of the horde to catch up. "a pure violation of god's great creation! it's an infestation, it's world domination-!" you belt out, the truck fully swaying by now. you glance up, everyone's staring at you anxiously. you had to come out on top for them.

thinking fast, you jump from the truck, landing on the van and almost slipping. the crowd slowly moves around the truck as it's rocking ceases, and you realise just how dangerous your new pedestal is. you have to keep moving to avoid getting grabbed, jumping across the cars and ignoring how your guitar doesn't hit every note perfectly.

"i never come second place, always been a big disgrace- shit." you dodge a walker quickly, clambering up onto another car. "smell the fear, i know you see- high achiever." you manage to get back on top of a high truck, watching two of the walkers approaching sophia who was at the side of the group. you strum aggressively, yelling your lyrics as far as your diaphragm would allow. "killing so i stay on top but i could never do any wrong! c'mon you freaks! i'm right here!" as sophia scrambles to carol's open arms, the zombies turn to you slowly and you grin.

"sour to the bone marrow, horrid to the core- all you've got is not enough, stupid! i just want more!" you yell, ignoring how the truck starts swaying. "and i'll throw another punch! yes, i'll get the highest score!" you land on the road, almost falling over before hopping over the barrier and leading them away. you had no plan, truly, only knowing that you had to lead the geeks away from the group.

as the music fades into the distance, the crowd of zombies following, the group almost relax. "what the hell are they thinking?!" dale snaps, peeking down from the top of the rv. "whatever they're thinking it worked." daryl huffs, crossing his arms and putting up a hard front to hide his anxiety. "are they gonna be okay?!" carol stresses, smoothing sophia's hair. "that was a LOT of walkers." lori adds on, holding carl close. "they'll be fine." daryl sighs gruffly. "let's wait for them to come back." he shrugs, walking off. "how are they gonna lose that many geeks?" glenn asks, and rick sighs. "let's just hope they do..." shane decides to add onto his friend's sentence. "and that they do it far from here."

night time approaches fast and the group's worry is increasing. carol notes how daryl anxiously scans the tree line for any sign of you. "daryl, come sit down." she sighs, gently touching his back. "nah, ain't that dark yet..." he sighs, perking up as a repeated clicking sounds through the woods. "you guys know y/n?" a woman asks, her horse jumping the barrier with ease. "yeah.. who're you?" daryl tenses.

"they're at my family's farm." the woman neglects his question, "they're hurt pretty bad." she adds, and daryl swears under his breath. "where's your farm?" he asks, approaching the woman. "i'll take you there. it's southeast from here, can't miss it. it's safe. we killed off the horde that was with them." she nods in the direction as daryl straddles the back of her horse before riding off with him.

"damn... they got away." t-dog says in amazement. "but they're injured. c'mon, we'll get ready to head there in the morning." rick nods, and everyone settles for a long night.

daryl dismounts the stranger's horse, running into the house where an old man stood. "they're-" "where are they?!" he snaps, pushing past. "they're resting." the old man replies calmly, leading him to a bed where you lay, a bloody bandage around your arm. "are they bit?" daryl tenses, observing you. you didn't look sick, but daryl couldn't tell in the poor lighting. "no. they got lucky." the man sighs. "i'm hershel greene. the woman who brought you here is my daughter maggie."

"there anyone else?" he asks, and hershel nods. "my other daughter beth and her boyfriend jimmy, my wife as well as otis who is out hunting and his wife patricia. you'll meet them in the morning." the old man nods, leaving daryl be. "you idiot..." he whispers, combing some hair out of your face. "you could've gotten killed." he adds, and you smirk slightly. "at least i helped... are they okay?" you ask, your voice raspy as your eyes peel open.

"everyone's fine, just worried." he shrugs, trying to seem like he doesn't care. "were you worried?" you tease, taking his hand in yours. "nah. but it's rather impressive how you managed to lead them away." he shrugs. "i passed out on these people's front door, i've got no idea how they dealt with those walkers." you cough, resting your hand on your dizzy head. "relax, don't overuse your brain. it ain't used to that much action." daryl smirks, nudging your arm.

"haha, very funny." you roll your eyes, swatting his elbow away. daryl lets out a breath of laughter, looking at you. "once i'm out this bed, i'm gonna try and figure out where the walkers went." you sit up, but daryl grabs you. "naw, you're resting tonight. you need it." he protests, pulling you back into the bed. as daryl goes to get up, you tug him back as well. "same goes to you, cowboy. come rest." you grin, pulling him onto the bed next to you.

daryl lands on his elbow to avoid landing on you. "before you protest, i could use the company right now. got a lot on my mind." you sigh as daryl hesitates before settling down. "wanna talk about it? 'm a good listener." he prompts, but you shake your head. "i'll manage... just need a familiar face right now." you sigh, resting your head on daryl's shoulder. "i get that.. i didn't have much but merle, and he helped me in his own way." daryl nods.

the two of you sit in silence, grieving over both of your losses before the topic changed. "what's wit' your song anyhow?" daryl asks, and you hum in question, looking at your guitar that was neatly leaned against the wall, your blood staining the strap. "dunno. was the first song that came to my head 'suppose." you yawn, voice sleepy. "had to have a loud song for my plan to work." you add, eyes fluttering closed.

daryl shuffles so his chest presses into yours, arm stiffly draping over you. "what if your plan didn't work? i saw that truck wobbling like it was about to tip over." daryl points out, and you shrug. "if it did, i would be dead, or at least bit." you sigh, opening your eyes once more. "you are an idiot." daryl scolds, and you chuckle. "mhm. but it worked. saved your ass anyway." you fall quiet before asking what's nagging your mind.

"is sophia okay?" you mumble, and daryl furrows his brows. "sophia? she's a bit shaken but yeah, she's doin' alright." daryl confirms and you let out a breath. "thank god." you chuckle as daryl shakes his head with a smile. "saw two of them going for her, too far to see if she got grabbed or not." you explain, and daryl hums. "well, she's not bit, carol would be hysterical if she was." daryl notes, and you nod, happy with his answer as you slowly doze off.

you wake up with daryl wrapped up around you tightly. he's normally the first one awake, so you guessed he had a late night. "dixon, c'mon. get up." you shake him gently, ignoring how he groans in protest. "daryl, c'mon! i wanna snoop around!" you whisper yell, jumping as hershel walks in abruptly. "ah, i see you're awake. lemme check your arm." the new presence wakes daryl immediately as he groggily blinks and grips the handle of his knife.

you sit up, letting hershel peel back the bandages with a yucky noise. you wince, letting out a pained noise as he pokes the flesh around your gash. "there's still bark in there from where that stick stabbed you." he notes with a sigh. "bark?" daryl sits up, watching hershel slowly press the bandages back onto the wound. "careful!" your friend snaps as you let out a strangled noise. "don't worry, they'll be fine." hershel replies, nonchalantly.

you pat your arm gently as if to soothe it as daryl broods, leaning over you protectively. "let's clean it up and get some fresh bandages on it." hershel gathers some material and his tools as well as calling to his wife to bring a bowl of water.

soon enough, you're say with an arrow in your mouth as hershel pulls the last piece of bark out of your arm, dropping it onto a tray where it clutters uselessly onto the metal. "right, let's clean it." he mumbles, mainly to himself as he wets a small cotton ball in water with a pair of tongs. with every gentle dab against your gash, you whimper, teeth clutching the metal of the arrow.

your free hand grabs the nearest thing to you which happened to be daryl's hand, squeezing tightly for reassurance as your eyes flutter closed. "do y'think it'll need stitches?" patricia asks, to which you shake your head. "i'm not having stitches." you protest, words muffled by the object you're biting. "unfortunately, you may need them..." hershel sighs, and you shake your head as he puts the tongs down. spitting out the arrow, you glare at hershel. "i'm not having them." you declare, barely being able to raise your arm to look at the wound crossing your bicep.

"i'm afraid you might have to. it's deeper than i thought." hershel nods, looking for his needle and thread that patricia hands to him. "i'm not having them!" you panic, scrambling back from the man and almost falling off the bed. daryl catches you, steadying you and glares at hershel. "y/n..." hershel tries but daryl snaps. "if they don't want 'em they ain't havin' them!" he snarls, and hershel backs down.

"fine. i can't force you." hershel sighs, putting the needle and thread down as you calm your breathing. daryl rubs your back soothingly, helping you unwind faster as maggie barges in. "daddy! the others are here." she informs, before leaving. hershel nods, gesturing for you to come over to him with some bandages. "i'll do it. patched up a fair amount of people in my time." daryl extends his hand to hershel who hands them over. "alright, but if you get it wrong i'll redo them."

with hershel gone and patricia following, you relax slightly as daryl readies your arm before gently wrapping the bandages around your bicep. "why don't you want stitches?" he asks, and you shudder. "i don't want a needle going through my arm!" your spine shivers at the thought. "naw, i get that.." he mumbles, carefully pinning the bandages into place with a safety pin. "done, c'mon. let's go see the others." he nods to the door, helping you up.

glenn smiles brightly at you, wrapping you up in a hug. "ow- careful- careful!" you hiss as he accidentally presses into your wound. "sorry!" he stumbles back, and carl bounds up to you. "y/n! you're alright!" he smiles brightly, and you smile awkwardly. "yeah..! i'm alright." you tense as he hugs you tightly, awkwardly patting his head and looking at lori for help. his mother laughs, beckoning him over. "you were so cool! the way they all looked at you and you didn't even get scared!" the boy beamed, practically vibrating.

"carl, c'mon!" sophia beams, gesturing to a swing nearby. "stay in sight of me or carol!" lori reminds and they nod. "glad to see you're alright." shane nods to your arm, and you grin. "i'm tough. had plenty of bottles to the head or thrown at me. i'll live." you cross your arms, glancing at daryl. "what happened anyway?" dale asked as hershel guided everyone to the house away from the tree line. "stray branch stabbed me. nothing awful." you shrug, peering to the barn curiously.

"daryl, i'm gonna go walk around, stretch my legs. you coming?" you smile, and daryl nods. "sure." you grab his hand to pull him away, but hershel stops you. "don't go too far and don't go in the barn. nothing in there but old rusty tools anyway and the last thing i need is another injury." he warns, and you sigh. "fine fine, no barn concert then." you grin, pulling daryl away from the group.

"you're going in anyway, aren't you?" daryl smirks, following you closely. "of course. are you saying you wouldn't?" you giggle before hearing carol yelp. "sophia?!" the two of you turn to see the mother searching the area around the swing desperately. "shit..! another time then." you run back to the group with daryl hot on your tail.

"carl said they were gonna play hide and seek so he doesn't know... i'm sure she didn't go far." rick sighs, adjusting his hat to keep the sun out of his eyes as he scans the tree line. "hershel, any idea of where she could hide around here?" shane asks, but hershel shakes his head. "nothing around here but open field..." he gestures around, and carol hiccups a sonb as lori tries to comfort her.

you look at daryl before glancing to the barn. "is she behind the barn?" you ask, and hershel falls quiet. "could be... but there's no way in other than the doors and we would of seen her go in." he shrugs. "me and daryl can scan around there, see what we can find." you nod, and daryl heads off in that direction. "don't go in!" hershel reminds you, and you feel your spine tickle with suspicion. "what a weirdo..." you roll your eyes and daryl hums.

you walk around the barn, gently calling out for sophia. "nothing..." you sigh, looking around. "hey, see that?" daryl asks, and you turn to where he points. "an open window..." you grin. "gimme a lift, i'm gonna take a peek." daryl crouches behind you, grabbing your hips and hoisting you up so you can grab the windowsill.

"see anything?" he asks, but you shake your head, squinting harshly to try and see. "nah, it's too dark." you gesture for the flashlight daryl carries, and he hands it to you carefully to ensure he wouldn't drop you.

the light flickers, slowly blinking to life and you gasp, almost falling backwards. "holy shit!" you yelp, and daryl panics, pulling you back down. "what, what's in there?" he asks as you recover from the sight. "we need to go! there's a LOT of walkers in there!" you gasp, running back to the group.

[alderaani]

more than gold

summary:  A lost Jedi Temple, a riddle, some literature, and feelings that Cody isn't ready to speak out loud. | AO3

note: written for @codywanweek and the alt day 5 prompt Sith/Jedi Artefact Shenanigans! sliding in on the last day with one more thing written than expected, so i’m happy with that! i’m pretty ill today so i hope it actually makes some coherent sense 😂 also if the riddle was super obvious, soz, never written one before and turns out it’s really hard.

-

“You know, I could have sworn I told you not to touch that,” Cody says conversationally, from where he’s splayed out on his back.

“Really? I’m sure I didn’t hear you,” Obi-Wan says, cheerful despite being crumpled in a heap. His elbow is in Cody’s gut. Cody glares at him.

The room they’re lying in is circular, stone, carved out of some Forced-damned mountain and according to Obi-wan, practically thrumming with power. The ceiling is high and vaulted, letting in slivers of light where intricate mirror systems catch the sunlight of double suns and project it deep underground. It takes on a slightly blue cast, reflecting off the huge pool of water they were lucky to not fall into. Four walkways at each cardinal point lead to a central platform, and interspersed between them are four waterfalls.

It should be serene. Except now the waterfalls are travelling backwards, and all the doors, including the one they came in by, are blocked. Cody scrambles up onto his elbows, dislodging Obi-Wan with a grunt.

“What did you do?”

Obi-Wan follows his gaze and gasps, delighted. “Now, will you look at that?”

Cody is looking. Frankly, he doesn’t trust this place enough to not keep his eye on it at all times. Obi-Wan keeps saying that this temple was built long ago, by ancient, peaceful Jedi as a place of learning, and that it won’t hurt them. After they got cut off from the rest of their men at the entrance, however, Cody thinks he could be forgiven for having his doubts.

As Obi-Wan himself proves, peace-keeping hardly rules out danger.

“Amazing,” Obi-Wan breathes, hoisting himself to his feet without a second glance, to walk back up to the plinth and stalk round it, examining the incomprehensible runes engraved there.

Cody is left to peel himself off the floor, and instead goes to prod at the barriers now sealing the exits with the end of his blaster. He tries not to look too much at Obi-Wan, at the soft sweep of his hair and the span of his shoulders. Being on their own like this is something he’s avoided, of late - not because he doesn’t enjoy it, but because he’s starting to enjoy it all too much.

He doesn’t trust the way his heart leaps when Obi-Wan smiles, when he asks him to call him ‘Obi-Wan’, when the cycle draws on and they’re up late again, companionably finishing reports and debating strategy. Or, as they had been doing until Cody got cold feet and started finding excuses, debating novels, which Obi-Wan checked out of the Temple archives and read aloud, one chapter at a time, before they turned in for the night.

He doesn’t trust himself not to ruin this by overstepping. There’s something about his general that makes him lose all control of his tongue, and puts him in danger of voicing thoughts that really he should not be having at all.

It’s agony. It’s bliss. It’s stretching him to breaking point, and this is possibly the worst situation they could have ended up in, really.

“These are made out of water,” he says over his shoulder, grunting as he tries to push his blaster through. He is, of course, unsuccessful.

“Ingenious,” Obi-Wan says. “How did they manage that, I wonder?”

Cody cuts a glance back at him, and grins, despite his exasperation.

“You’re not more worried about how we’re going to get out?”

Obi-Wan waves a hand. “I’m sure the path will reveal itself, in time. Oh, look - Cody, I think this is a puzzle!”

Cody bites back a groan. They do not have time for this. They never really had time for it, but Obi-Wan promised it would be a brief detour on their way to the capital for hyperspace lane access negotiations. He’d looked so excited by recon reports of a lost temple that Cody just hadn’t been able to say no. He’s never able to say no to Obi-Wan, even when he isn’t following orders. It’s probably his fatal flaw.

“I don’t suppose there’s an off switch? A back button?” He asks hopelessly. The Force, at least the Jedi sort, very rarely seems to work that way. Obi-Wan is always talking about moving through problems, about seeking balance and adapting to what’s around you, rather than manipulating it. It’s not Cody’s favoured approach; he was trained to leverage his environment to its maximum advantage, and finds he has little patience for anything else.

Obi-Wan snorts. “This is a defensive mechanism, I’m afraid. Judging by the architecture this was built at the height of the Sith Wars. This artefact is designed to trap us here until we understand the mechanism and progress, or until, back when the temple was occupied, someone would come and deal with the intruder.”

“That doesn’t sound very peaceful,” Cody says.

Obi-Wan shoots him an amused look, the warm, soft kind that makes heat rise from the pit of Cody’s belly right up to his ears.

“Even a pacifist may defend himself,” he says, then leans over the pedestal. “Now, how about you stop grousing and come help me with this?”

Cody rolls his eyes, but goes, slinging his blaster across his back and crossing his arms.

“And stop looming,” Obi-Wan laughs, catching one of Cody’s gloved hands and pulling it down to rest at his side. The simple touch makes Cody’s cheeks burn.

“Don’t see what help I can give you, Sir,” he says, frowning down at the characters surrounding the bright blue artefact. “I was never any good at Ithorian.”

Obi-Wan pauses, then tilts his head up. “Ah. Is that what it is?”

“I - I think so?” Cody was never any good at his language flashtraining; he never had the proper patience for it, but he can usually figure out the basics.

“No, no,” Obi-Wan muses, stroking at his beard with his free hand. “You’re quite right. Goodness me, it's been a long time since I last saw this dialect. Let’s see now…”

Cody steps back and waits, keeping his attention firmly split between their blocked exit points while Obi-Wan ponders. The slow upward movement of the waterfalls is eerie - it still makes noise, but none of it is right. Instead of the gentle patter he expects of water joining a larger pool, there’s a faint gurgling as they move further into each grate, travelling somewhere he cannot see.

Obi-Wan finishes his fifth circle round the platform, and the hand at his chin goes still. Cody stands at attention, expectant.

“It’s a riddle,” Obi-Wan says, and if possible, his delight grows. “Yes - the language is coming back to me now. Do you know, I haven’t looked at Ithorian in maybe 12 years?”

“Sir?” Cody says, tilting his head to look at the characters more closely. He doesn’t have even a passing proficiency at modern Ithorian, and presumably it’s changed a bit over the millennia. His training was focused on the basics, and only the useful bits, at that. He thinks he can make out the words for ‘ water ’, and ‘ enemy’ , both of which are either unhelpfully descriptive or frankly discouraging, but that’s about the extent of it.

“My old master - he loved prophecies. When I was a teenager I could never see the point of it, but it meant I spent a lot of time learning the old Ithorian dialects. They’re known as the most peaceful species, did you know?” Obi-Wan shakes his head. “They’ll exile anyone violent, it’s quite remarkable, really. I suppose in some sort of idealistic emulation, a lot of the early Jedi texts are written in their dialect.”

His blue eyes are keen, his laser sharp focus firmly on the podium. It gives Cody a moment to observe his clever fingers, the long line of his neck, the open delight with which he tackles this new problem. It’s a rare thing, to see him so relaxed, and Cody can’t help the fond smile that creeps up on him despite the circumstances. This almost makes it worth it, and on reflection, he’d rather an ancient temple than the last thing that had made Obi-Wan so happy; a wretched, bioluminescent fungus, which had infected half the battalion and given them hives. Their general had studied it for weeks.

Obi-Wan’s lips quirk up. Cody barely trusts himself to speak.

“I didn’t know, Sir,” Cody croaks, then pauses, fishing for something normal to say. “Didn’t we have to defend the governor’s daughter from an Ithorian bounty hunter on Ganaris-IV?”

“Well,” Obi-Wan grins. “Those exiles have to go somewhere, don’t they?”

Cody huffs a laugh and reaches up to scratch his neck at the seam of his bucket.

“Let’s just hope they didn’t all come here. What’s this riddle, then?”

Obi-Wan shifts to the side, then points at a spot on the podium. “As I said, it’s been a long time, but I think it starts here, and goes something like:

A thing to be forged, where water is thicker,

Worth more than gold, unless it’s pyrite that glitters.

An enemy of my enemy, or in hard times, in need,

Sometimes fair-weather, or in high places indeed.

What are you, traveller? ”

All of Cody’s hopes that it would be something nice and obvious, like “lightsaber” or, given what’s going on around them, “gravity”, escape from him like smoke. Jedi and their metaphors. It’s not just a quirk of Obi-Wan’s, clearly.

“Does that mean anything to you, Sir?” he asks, turning the words over in his head once, twice, then frowning when nothing comes immediately.

Obi-Wan’s brow is also furrowed, but in a leisurely, meditative manner.

“...I have some ideas, I think,” he says. “How about you, my friend?”

What does he think? He thinks that there are other sorts of puzzles he is much better suited to. Word play and idioms...what does a clone have to offer that?

Still, Obi-Wan is watching him, expectant and gentle, and he sifts back through the lines, a little more seriously this time.

“Ice, maybe?”

Obi-Wan nods, slowly. “Perhaps. Walk me through it.”

Cody swallows. “Ice is something that can be made, right? It’s not exactly forged, but…”

He trails off in uncertainty.

“Go on,” Obi-Wan says with another one of those soft, devastating smiles. It fractures all the thoughts in Cody’s head, and he has to stop, clear his throat and gather up all the pieces.

“I suppose...it’s just thicker water, isn’t it? On warm planets it’s a valuable commodity, it’s found in high places, and I suppose if you wanted snow, a freeze would be fair weather.”

Obi-Wan is rubbing his beard again, and he’s still smiling. “Fascinating. I would never have thought of that...only, I don’t think it’s quite there. That mention of pyrite is troublesome, and the ‘enemy of my enemy’, where does that fit in?”

Cody shrugs his shoulders, frustrated, and feels a hot flush creep up his neck. “Don’t know why you’re asking me, to be honest, Sir. Kamino hardly covered poetry.”

There’s a slight pause, then Obi-Wan’s hand is on his again, tugging it slowly down from where he’s crossed his arms.

“I wish you wouldn’t do that,” he says, soft.

“Do what?” Cody’s voice is gruff.

“Dismiss yourself. You do it sometimes when we’re reading together. There is often no right and wrong answer to these things, no secret. There is only perspective, and you see things I never would, if only you would trust yourself.”

Cody looks down and away, back towards the waterfalls and their slow, glacial climb. He isn’t sure that’s true. He enjoys what Obi-Wan shares with him, what other lives he gets to touch in their books, but more than anything they convince him that, beyond war, he knows very little of anything at all. He would like to, someday.

His eyes land on Obi-Wan’s lips briefly, before he tears them away. Particular experiences he would like to know more than others.

There was one book that Obi-Wan had read early on, back when this infatuation was just setting its first tendrils into him, about a forbidden romance at the heart of the old Mandalorian court. Two heirs of rival clans battling to be together against the good approval of their noble relatives. It had been torrid, ridiculous and entirely unexpected when Obi-Wan had suggested they break up their reports with some literature.

But what it had done was give him the words to express the crawling heat in his stomach, the urge he has to reach out, to touch, to soothe, to care for. He’d known what he wanted before that, of course, in a more rudimentary manner, but it had gifted him the language of yearning.

Suddenly, a particular passage springs into his mind and he straightens.

“You don’t think it could mean ally, do you? In Beneath the Armour, Mata threatens Clan Riza by saying he has ‘allies in high places’.”

Obi-Wan pauses, and then a brilliant smile spreads over his face. “Yes, that’s it! Pyrite - Fool’s Gold; a false friend! Brilliant Cody, whatever made you think of that?”

Cody grins, even though Obi-Wan can’t see it, and doesn’t answer.

“Is that really it?”

“I think you’re very close,” Obi-Wan says. “The characters engraved into the platform...yes! Stand close to me, Commander.”

Cody does, watching curiously as Obi-Wan lifts his hands, shuts his eyes, frowns, and pushes . Six blocks that make up the platform lift, the characters on each glowing bright, lurid blue. Under their feet, something scrapes, shifts and clunks, before the platform lurches upwards, spinning gently.

There’s a thunderous gurgling sound, before all of the pool beneath drains away.

“The answer,” Obi-Wan says, slightly breathless, his hair a little out of place. “Was friend.”

“The doorways are still blocked,” Cody notes drily. The plinth with the blue orb that started this whole mess has also risen, and underneath it are a set of very wet, slimy looking steps. “I don’t suppose it’s as simple as just walking down these and getting in?”

“Likely not,” Obi-Wan agrees, then inexplicably shifts a little closer, so that they are sharing space. Cody’s heart skips a beat. “But it’s like I told you, Cody. You are far greater than what you have been given.”

Cody coughs and looks at his feet, at their boots almost toe to toe, pleasure at the praise singing low through his body.

“Now,” Obi-Wan says, too close and not close enough. “How do you feel about another puzzle?”

Cody groans, laughing, and after a moment, follows his General into the dark.