#and it goes without saying that the song is also today’s Weather Report

[seventh-district]

*wakes up at 5pm*

IT’S FRIDAY BABEY

*immediately opens youtube to go listen to the official version of Unknown by Hozier*

[fbfh]

curiosity is a wonderful thing - ch. 7

wc: 2.4k

genre: slowburn, friends to lovers, fluff

pairing: audrey x ben, eventual ben x daughter of alice!reader

warnings: none I don't think?? the word biznautch (which is not a word but I'm sure tuco and saul would disagree)

summary: you and ben catch up while you walk around campus. you talk about the isle kids, and ben wishes desperately he could be as close to you as he wants to.

song recs: honey and the bee - owl city, galactic bloom - bee and puppycat ost

a/n: huzzah i am back from the dead!! (sort of). anyway definitely expect a slow trickle of sporadically posted long form fics and regularly scheduled drabbles and asks. love you guys. love that you love curiosity as much as I do. here's a fit. as a treat. :* (also expect things to get real dramatic real quick)

TAGS @yesv01 @magcon7280 @hopefullhearts @thatawkwardlittlefangirl @sunshineangel-reads @dustyinkpages @inejsknifes @tulipmagnoliaisme @ev3ningrain

After the next day, things begin to settle down and go back to normal. The Isle kids start their remedial goodness classes, the boys try out for sports, and Mal tags along with Evie as she socializes between class periods. You find yourself running between campus and your dorm where you’d forgotten your report on your desk after the late night before, and end up feeling that you’re quite discombobulated for most of the afternoon. Ben, of course, is as busy as ever. You don’t think you’ve seen each other for more than two seconds today, and you can’t say you like when things get all frantic like this.

After classes, and after your quick detour to Wonderland, and after Ben’s meeting with Fairy Godmother and tourney practice, you try to figure out what to do until the junior royal council meeting today. Audrey will be there - if she decides to show up, that is. You also received RSVPs from Aziz, Jordan, Lonnie, and Herkie. The main topic of discussion for this meeting will be to plug in with them and get an idea of how the student body is feeling with the addition of the Isle kids to the school. If there are no major delays, Ben and Herkie should be able to get back to tourney on time to get ready for the match later. It’s going to be a huge deal - the first big game of the year - and the whole school is buzzing with excitement. 

You sit at a table outside by the school’s hedge maze, sipping some tea as you finish your homework. It’s peaceful, and the weather is ambient. Your mind zips and buzzes around like a bread and butterfly, flitting between your history of magic worksheet, where you’ll explore next time you can sneak off to Wonderland, how Ben is doing - and by proxy, how the Isle kids are doing. A warm breeze passes by you, and you can smell flowers as it swirls around. Hydrangeas maybe? No, lilacs. Definitely lilacs. You hear footsteps approaching down the cobblestone path leading to the gardens and hedge maze. When you look up, you’re surprised to see Ben in his tourney uniform. 

“Ben!” You exclaim happily, standing up and scurrying over to greet him. He opens up his arms to wrap you in a big, warm hug. He’s a little sweaty from practice, but he doesn’t smell bad. You don’t think Ben ever smells bad (maybe a little bit like wet dog when he goes swimming, but it’s not overbearing or unpleasant.)

“What are you doing here?” You ask, wondering if he’ll be able to meet all the tasks on his agenda without running late. He shrugs a little, smiling as he pulls away.

“I was nearby, I thought I’d stop by for a few minutes before getting changed for the junior council meeting.”

You smile up at him with a knowing, appreciative look. His dorm is nowhere near the gardens, and seeing you was definitely not along the way. But your heart warms that he still took some time out of his blackberry jam-packed schedule to stop by and see you. You know if you don’t walk him back to campus he’ll never get changed in time, so you gather up your stuff, tucking it somewhat neatly back in your teapot bag. 

“Well, your timing couldn’t be more impeccable, as I was just about done out here.” 

Ben chuckles a little, and you walk alongside each other towards the rest of campus. 

“So, how did tourney practice go?” You ask. You know the whole team is really excited for this game, but they’ve been putting a lot of pressure on themselves too. Ben takes in a breath before replying.

“I think we’re just about as ready as we’ll ever be.” You nod, humming in agreement as he continues. “I mean, running drills and plays is great, you can never practice enough. But unless we can actually apply the plays on the field the way we do them during practice - on a good day, at least-” 

You chuckle with him, remembering all the stories of how questionably tourney practices can end up when the other players are more focused on goofing off than improving their skills.

“That’s when we’ll actually see some improvement.” 

You nod in approval. 

“Hopefully Chad will learn how to actually complete a pass, too.”

A loud laugh bursts out of Ben. He never would have said it outloud, but you both know you were thinking it. “Yeah,” he agrees with a chuckle, “that- that would be a very good day.” 

He glances down at you, walking close beside him. Just like how you always seem to know just what he’s thinking, he’s gotten pretty good at reading your mind in that same way. He knows the question that’s rolling around the tip of your tongue, itching to get out. 

“The new transfers are doing well, too.” He nods. 

You’ve both heard countless people calling them the Isle kids, and it seems to be catching on. You and Ben had both hoped that they would be known as transfer students at most - the whole point is to help them assimilate to become part of Auradon, not constantly remind them of the past. But if there’s one thing you and Ben both know about people and politics, it’s that you can’t control public opinion. Or word of mouth. As long as they’re not bothered by it, you and Ben don’t feel it’s any issue, but you still call them transfers out of habit when speaking to each other. You just hope they’ll trust you enough to express any discomfort or upset that might arise. 

“Jay has been… crushing it at tourney.” He says with a slight chuckle and disbelieving shake of his head. 

“I can’t believe he hadn’t had an opportunity to play before now,” you agree. “Imagine how great he’d be if he’d been recruited before now.”

Ben agrees, and a resolute silence settles over the two of you for a moment. If he keeps playing and improving like he has been, Jay could easily land a spot on a pro tourney team after graduating. Ben wouldn’t be surprised if he was recruited before then. If he had been given an opportunity to play before now, he would practically have a guaranteed career handed to him. Probably more than one. It’s so terrible that his talent was wasted before now, and if he hadn’t pushed for this proclamation… 

Ben’s mind begins to wander back to the other poor kids stuck on the Isle. He knows they’re meant for more than that, that there are future doctors and activists and artists walking around there every day. Future friends that he can easily see growing into established pillars and cornerstones of the community. He gets that ache in his chest, that impulse to just say fuck it and bring everyone over at once. He curbs it as soon as it shows up. He knows that the way to make that happen, the way to repay them for all their unnecessary suffering is to make sure he puts in the work right here, right now. If he wants to bring more people over - which he fully intends to do - he has to make sure that the first four succeed. 

“Oh,” he starts, pulling out of his train of thought, turning his attention back to you. “And Carlos?”

You look at him, eager to know how he’s doing.

“You’re never going to believe this,” he starts with a chuckle, “Carlos and Duke have been inseparable for the better part of a week.” 

He watches you closely as he speaks, not wanting to miss the moment when you realize how great this is. He watches as your eyes widen and you let out a delighted gasp. 

“Really?” You exclaim. Ben is already nodding, smiling right along with you, swept up in your infectious joy.

“Yeah, I-I couldn’t believe it, I mean, he was terrified of dogs - his mother called them…” he struggles for a moment to remember the exact phrase Carlos had used. “Rabid pack animals.”

“What?” You can’t believe anyone would hate animals so much, especially enough to make someone else so deathly afraid of them. “Why on earth would she-” 

“I don’t know.” Ben finishes for you. 

“Sounds like-” 

Something Audrey would say.

You catch yourself, thinking better of it before completing the thought. 

“Oh,” you pretend to interrupt yourself with a more important thought, “how is Evie doing? She was having a difficult time in class today.” 

Ben nods sadly.

“Yeah. I spoke to Doug about it. She, uh- she was reading her answers off of something.”

“She’s probably nervous.” You add. “I mean, education isn’t exactly the Isle’s top priority…”

It’s the understatement of the century, and Ben quickly sees where you’re headed with that. If none of the Isle kids were ever in an appropriately challenging or attentive academic setting, of course Auradon Prep would be overwhelming. Ben nods, realizing the same thing.

“I’ll work with the faculty- see if I can set them up with some tutors once they’re a little more… settled in.” 

You nod, about to say something when you pause in your tracks. Ben stops, looking back at you and wondering what he missed. Before he can ask, you let out a sigh.

“Look at this!” You exclaim, gesturing to a section of brick wall encasing a topiary. It’s been painted in shades of green, purple, and black spray paint, expertly crafted into a dynamic dragon silhouette. You turn back to Ben, frustrated at all the potential going to waste on the Isle. 

“Please tell me she’s signed up for some sort of art class.” You ask, somewhat rhetorically.

Ben follows your gaze, noticing the paint that now decorates the previously barren wall. 

Ben chuckles a little, agreeing with you. 

“I’ll be sure to-”

“Oh! Did I tell you?” You exclaim, suddenly remembering something you’d been desperate to tell Ben earlier that day. Ben, used to all sorts of interesting twists and turns in conversations with you, simply files his thought away on a little post it note in his brain, and turns his attention back to you.

“I don’t know, did you?” He asks, somewhat rhetorically. 

“Do you remember how I told you about the wildflowers and their song recitals?” 

“Of course,” he nods. How could he forget anything you tell him? Especially when it’s about Wonderland?

“The poppies and the peonies have begun to argue over who’s going to sing the alto solo in the second verse.” You state as intensely and dramatically as if you were recounting the most mind boggling argument you’ve ever seen. As you recount the increasingly petty arguments between the flowers, the clashing of their personalities, Ben realizes this probably is the most mind boggling drama you’ve ever seen. 

Ben listens intently as you describe the clashing personalities of and different cliques forming among the Wonderland wildflowers. His heart sinks a little in that way it always tends to when you talk about Wonderland. He wishes he could go there with you. It breaks his heart that he’ll never be able to see it first hand, that you’ll never get to show it to him. He wants more than anything to be able see where you’re from, to take it the wonder. He knows how much it would mean to you, which is more than reason enough. Besides, he feels like if he could just go there, if he could stand in the same place where you feel most at home, he feels like he could really, finally understand it. Understand you. 

But he knows it’s too dangerous. You both do. He just wishes you had someone to protect you, to keep you safe. 

“Is it dangerous there?” He had asked you once. “No.” You’d replied with a coy smile. “Not if you know what you’re doing.”

“Do you?” He had teased. You laughed. You nudged him with your shoulder. 

“As much as I know my tea.” 

That settled it for him.

He knows that even if you did have some sort of bodyguard with you down there with you, you’d be the one protecting them. 

“Oh, by the by,” your voice pulls him from his train of thought as you approach the school. “Don’t worry about those papers for the next council meeting, I’ll drop them off for you.” 

He had completely forgotten about that. 

“Are you sure?” He starts to ask, but you’re already playfully waving his concern away. 

“Pish tosh.” You state.

“Okay…” he concedes, chuckling at your turn of phrase. 

“I wasn’t done.” You state, with a humorously serious expression. 

“Pish tosh, fish wash, bish bosh, coin toss.” 

His chuckle has turned into full blown laughter.

“Car floss, hair loss, kiss squash, witch watch, biznautch.” You finish. “It’s bad luck not to say the whole thing.” You counter. 

“I’ll… I’ll remember that, bunny.” You nod your head curtly. “Here, uh-”

He fumbles through his bag for the papers to hand you, which you accept happily. 

“Right…” you tuck them into your teapot, pulling out your messy, worn in planner. It always has a million things sticking out of it and falling out from between the pages. Every time you take it out, Ben thinks it looks so… frazzled. 

“Right right right,” you mutter, making a noise when you find what you’re looking for. “So. I drop off the papers, check on the party planning committee, then a quick dip down and back in time for the tourney match.” 

You look at Ben for approval, making sure you hadn’t forgotten something. He nods.

“Yes. And I am going to go check on the transfers-”

“Text me and update, please?” You ask sweetly. Ben knows you don’t have great reception in Wonderland - but more than that, you usually wind up so engrossed that you forget you even have a phone. Despite this, you love coming back up to Overland to be met with a flurry of texts from Ben. Random thoughts, reminders he worried he’d forget, and anything else flitting across his mind between when you left and where you were.

“Of course,” Ben smiles, then continues. “Check on transfers, meet up with Audrey, warm up and practice with the team, then it’s game time.” 

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” You state, reassuring him you’ll be back in time no matter what. You look down at the rabbit hole opening up at your feet, then back up at Ben.

“Either of them.”

[ginger-danica-snapps]

WIP Wednesday. A snip from my back in time, fix it Jonsa story and my Ned marries Cersei instead of Catelyn AU.

"Here,” the child said and while Sansa was kneeling another person slipped from between the trees. This time a woman in a long flowing, tan dress, but her hair looked like the bark of the weirwood. She held something in her hands.

Jon watched as Sansa realized what it was and began to stand and protest, but Jon placed a hand on her shoulder to keep her kneeling.

“þú eru dawninn bringer, protector ór fólk,inn móðir ór allr hverr eru eigi dauðr. Vargr dróttning fran Norðririnn,” the child intoned as the woman came to stand before and raised a crown of weirdwood branches somehow petrified into a glistening, smooth crown with wild branches reaching to the moonlight.

Old tongue again, Jon realized and began to work through the translation, suddenly more grateful to his time among the freefolk.

“You are the dawnbringer, Protector of the People, Mother of All who are not dead. Wolf Queen from the North,” he murmured quietly, but kept his hand on her shoulder when she immediately began to protest.

The crown was nestled onto her head and Jon was moving to the front, pulling Dark Sister from sheath again and laying her tip down onto the ground with his head bowed.

“I swear to be the sword that guards you till there is no breath left in my body. Night gathers, and now my watch begins. It shall not end until my death. I shall take no other to wife, hold no lands that are not yours as well, and father no children that do not call you mother. You are the queen I choose. You are my queen, now and always.”

It was a cold morning when Cersei Lannister pulled her cloak around her shoulders and slipped out of her room. Melara and Jeyne already waited for her patiently and she slipped past them without a word of greeting. They followed silently as Cersei expertly navigated her way outside of Casterly Rock without running into nary a servant or soldier who would scamper off to tattle.

They reached the woods without speaking and Cersei turned with a sharp grin. She held her hands out to the two girls and they smiled back and reached out to clasp hands. Turning they ran into the forest, laughing, as Cersei led them to the small creek.

“Where did you say she was?” Cersei asked as they cautiously stepped onto slick rocks, never letting go of each other.

“A good walk down the creek and even longer into the dark of the woods. Cersei, are you sure we should do this?” Melara whispered.

“Of course,” Cersei answered automatically and turned to go deeper into the woods while tugging at their hands.

“Your father, Cersei, we would be in so much trouble,” Jeyne added as she slightly resisted.

Cersei sighed. What use was having companions if they weren’t willing to take chances? As always Cersei struggled with the idea that these were her childhood friends, but that they were first put in place by her Aunt Genna and likely reported much of her adventures. She was still pretty convinced that it was Jeyne who had reported Cersei and Jaime switching places every other day in his training.

She missed the physical exertion of swords play and the way she was able to hit the mark every time she released her bow string.

Still, it was her responsibility to soothe her companions when fearful.

“You will almost always be the highest ranking woman in the room, Cersei. One day, you will marry a Prince of Dorne if all goes as planned and only the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, her daughters, and the wife of the Prince will outrank you. You need to always be the calming presence for your ladies. They must never see your fear, because then they will remain calm and know all is well,” Joanna Lannister brushed Cersei’s hair back from her face in soft, strong strokes.

Her mother was always soft and strong. Cersei wanted to be just like her when she married and took over her own household.

“I heard father say he wished me to marry Prince Rhaegar, Mother,” Cersei answered quietly.

Her mother’s hands froze for a second, but then she began her strokes anew.

“Your father thinks he can sway Aerys, yes, but I fear, little light, that Aerys will only seek to enrage your father. Lions were not meant to marry Dragons, my daughter. Remember that, if you remember nothing else. We may work in service, even be close in friendship as I was once to Queen Rhaella, but we must never join with the dragon,” Joanna whispered, “I would not have my little light burned by a dragon’s fire.”

Cersei spun around again and squeezed her companion’s hands.

“You need not fear my father, Jeyne,” Cersei assured her, though she also felt her very heart tremble at the idea of being caught.

They continued into the forest, following the stream till it ended in a pretty little waterfall, before tipping deeper into the forest than Cersei had ever traveled. They found Maggy the Frog’s house tucked into a dark clearing, behind a small pond. Moss grew over the old stone and the roof was thatched.

Badly, Cersei noted to herself. There were holes and water gathering in a way that her father would never have allowed Lannisport to weather.

Her mother would have cared about the witch in the wood, but her father would likely burn her out if he realized she was here.

“I…,” Jeyne stuttered and Melara and Cersei turned.

Jeyne wrenched her hand from them and looked around with wide, frightened eyes.

Cersei nodded and gave a slight shoulder shrug, “Walk back to the water, Jeyne. Melara, go with her. I will speak to this Maggy the Frog and come meet you.”

Jeyne barely dipped a slight curtsy to her liege’s daughter, before lifting her skirts and running back the way they came. Melara gave Cersei a concerned look and Cersei thought she could see real concern. She motioned her away.

She waited till both girls were gone and turned back and set her shoulders with determination and marched up and knocked on the door. If her companion’s had stayed, Cersei would perhaps have marched in with no regard to the owner just to show her seniority on her father’s land.

“A humble lady will always garner more loyalty among her compatriots than a prideful one,” her mother’s voice whispered in her ear.

“The lion does not lay down and sleep with the sheep,” her father followed.

“Come in, little lion child,” a voice called out and Cersei opened the door and softly stepped in, her boots already ruined from the walk.

“Are you Maggy the Frog?” she asked, forcing strength into her tone.

The woman cocked her head and Cersei was at least glad to find the woman did not resemble anything like a scary monster. In fact, she was quite boring.

“We wanted to see the monster,” Oberyn Martell said and Cersei rolled her eyes.

Everyone wanted to see her little imp of a brother.

“He’s just a baby. An ugly baby, but a baby,” Elia added and Cersei resisted the urge to snap back with a cutting remark.

He might be the curse upon her life, but he was her little brother and no one else was allowed to speak ill of a Lannister.

No one understood that Tyrion was a monster because he killed her mother, not because he was a misshapen little thing.

“Often go into your thoughts, girlie? I’m the one you call Maggy the Frog and I assume you’ve come to hear your future?” the woman said.

Cersei’s eyes widened. That, however, was not boring.

“Yes. I have. My father and aunt say I am to marry Prince Rhaeger, but my mother wished me to marry Prince Oberyn, though my father refused the Princess of Dorne. I want to know if I am to marry the prince and one day be Queen? How many children will I have?” Cersei eagerly stepped forward.

She would love her children and they would love her. They would never fear to whisper their secrets, hopes, and fears.

Maggy the Frog tilted her head and stared at her before reaching down and pulling a small dagger from beside her. Cersei took a step back, fear dogging at her step, before forcing herself to stand tall again.

“This is my father’s land and if you harm a hair on my head then he will gouge your eyes out and you will not see any future again, certainly not your own,” Cersei said coldly and startled when Maggy tilted her head back and laughed uproariously.

“Oh, little lion girlie, you are quite the opposite of what I saw for today as it is. Let us see what else has changed. A little taste of your blood girl to be able to see what is going to happen. To see if gold crowns and cold shrouds no longer lay across the lion spawn,” the woman explained and held the knife hilt out.

Cersei took a deep breath and stepped forward to take it. She laid it down easily onto her thumb and gave a slight whimper when it cut into her skin and blood welled to the top. She went to hold the knife back out, but found herself being yanked forward and her finger in the witches mouth.

Cersei had barely had time to react before she was released and she cupped her hand to her chest.

“Three questions, girlie, but most do not like my answ…” the woman made a sudden sharp noise and gripped at her head, gasping for breath, and Cersei started to move forward to help her.

The woman suddenly sat up and completely still, eyes shut, and back ramrod straight.

“Maggy?” Cersei whispered, fear starting to creep into her.

Maggy’s eyes flew open and Cersei gasped at the milky white expanse that existed where muddy, dark brown eyes had.

“The song of fire and ice comes, and nothing will stop the stag from killing the dragon. The wolf brother of the stag will help without knowing, without seeing. The wolf’s sister will die so their son may live. The gods give another choice not given before, eyes were open, but could not see. Winter comes, winter comes, and the wolves must live. A Queen she shall not make, but a mother of a King she shall be. Remember, learn, live, and roar. The Lioness will triumph if the last dragon son thrives,” Maggy gasped and then she collapsed.

[crystalstar8]

Knights of the Night (ch 9)

Chapter 9

Ch 1, ch 2, ch 3, ch 4, ch 5, ch 6, ch 7, ch 8, ch 9

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29139240/chapters/71536491

pairing: Jungkook x oc

genre: vampire au, college au, twilight, romance

word count: 2,620

warnings: blood (obviously), kidnapping, child kidnapping, needles, France

notes: vampires, vampire au, college, college au, so many twilight references, blood, needles, kidnapping, children, homelessness, dance, ballet, flashbacks, romance, slow burn, probably no smut, idk yet tho, France, French things, attempted genocide, inaccurate French history, bisexual main character, @strawberriewithchocolate-blog @mozy-j  @daechwitad-2​ @zobadak​​

summary: Catalina starts college in a small town all the way across the country. She doesn’t know anyone and isn’t exactly looking for friends. She just wants to focus on dance. But when she meets fellow dance major, Jimin, and adventurous, fellow freshman, Jungkook, Catalina ends up discovering a whole new side to the small college town; one that is dangerous but oh so enticing…

            The warm weather was fleeting; Catalina spent her days studying, working, and every chance she got, hanging out with her friends. The “baseball encounter”, as she’s been calling it, has been living in the back of her mind ever since, even though it seemed her friends had forgotten about it. She never brought it up, just focusing on her college life. Namjoon took her out to fancy bookstores and coffee shops, Jungkook tried and failed to teach her how to skateboard, and Jin tried and failed to help them in French. She was kept busy and she was having fun.

               All was peaceful, until a college student was reported missing in St. Briggs. Jimin cornered Catalina in dance class about it one chilly, early winter day.

               They were practicing their dance to “Body”, by Megan Thee Stallion.

               “One, two, three, turn, five, six, step and hit,” the teacher called out. “One, two, ba, ba, jump, Steve! What song are you dancing to, ‘cause it’s not this! Find the goddamn beat! Alright, everyone except Steve, take five.”

               Catalina’s final move in the dance was on the ground, so instead of getting up, she crawled over to her dance bag and pulled out her water bottle, collapsing against the wall. Jimin joined her and said, “Have you heard the news?”

               Catalina shook her head between sips.

               “A student went missing,” he said. “In St. Briggs. From our college.”

               “Aren’t they the second person to go missing here?” Catalina asked. “I don’t like the sound of that.”

               “Yeah, me neither,” said Jimin. “The first person was a little kid. My parents are freaking out about me walking to campus now.”

               “And the police have no idea who the guy is?” asked Catalina. “I mean, they don’t know anything?”

               “Not really,” said Jimin. “It’s like these people disappeared without a trace.”

               “Hm,” Catalina thought about the disappearances and the mysterious “baseball encounter”. She wondered if they were connected. “You wanna do some investigating?”

               “What are you-no, we’re not visiting those vampires,” said Jimin. “That’s a really bad idea. Namjoon told us to stay out of it and he definitely knows more about this stuff than we do.”

               Catalina knew she wouldn’t get anywhere with Jimin. She would just have to wait until she saw Jungkook to bring it up again. She knew he’d have no qualms about going on a potentially life-threatening mission.

Her chance came that weekend when she and Jungkook worked their shift together at the souvenir shop. Business was starting to pick up since the first snow was expected to arrive any day now.

Tourists started stopping by more and more and Catalina got to see what Jungkook meant by “hot tourists”. The men and the women were beautiful, and her and Jungkook both had fun checking them out from behind the counter. But today was slow, so Catalina figured she’d take the opportunity to tell him about her plan.  

               “Jungkook, what do you think about stealing that business card and sneaking around a potential lair?” asked Catalina.

               “I have no idea what you’re talking about, but yes. I’m in,” he said. The two of them were straightening the ceramic bear and eagle figurines, killing time between customers.

               “Remember those three vampires on baseball day?”

               “Uh-huh.”

               “The guy gave Namjoon a business card,” said Catalina.

               “Oh right! Yeah, I remember,” said Jungkook.

               “I was thinking maybe we could steal it and do our own investigating. I mean, what if those guys have something to do with the missing people?” Catalina said. Jungkook looked up at her with wide eyes.

               “Oh shit! Ya know, you’re probably right!” he said. “They just moved here, and then all of a sudden, a kid goes missing in this town. It makes sense.”

               “Exactly,” said Catalina.

               “But how will we get the business card?” asked Jungkook. “Do we sneak into his room or his office or whatever?”

               “That’s what I was thinking. One of us distracts him, while the other sneaks in and finds it,” said Catalina.

               “I feel like you should distract him. A classic honey pot mission,” said Jungkook.

               “Do you know what that means?” Catalina asked, snickering.

               “Don’t you seduce someone to complete a mission?” asked Jungkook.

               “You usually have to fuck someone in a honey pot mission,” said Catalina.

               “Oh, well, how bad can it be? I mean, he’s hot as fuck,” he said with a wave of his hand. Catalina’s face turned bright red.

               “I’m not- we’re…” she sighed. “Jungkook, casual sex isn’t really my thing and I don’t like him that way. I don’t think he likes me that way either.”

               “Are you kidding? What about all those bookstores and coffee shops? Those weren’t dates?” asked Jungkook. “What were you guys doing?”

               “Looking at books!” said Catalina. “He just really likes literature, and I really like coffee.”

               “Did he pay for your coffee every time?”

               “Yes.”

               “Then that’s a date,” said Jungkook.

               “We spot each other all the time. So, are you telling me it’s a date when you pay for my McDonalds or when I pay for your movie ticket?” asked Catalina.

               “That’s different,” said Jungkook. Catalina threw her hands up.

               “Okay, we’re getting off topic,” she said. “You distract him, I’ll get the card.”

               “Casual sex also isn’t my thing though,” said Jungkook.

               Catalina threw her head back laughing. “You don’t have to fuck him! Just keep him downstairs talking or something.”

               “I can do that. Are we doing it tonight?” asked Jungkook.

               “Sure.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

               That evening, Catalina and Jungkook went to the mansion. Jungkook brought his French homework. Luckily, Namjoon was the one to answer the door.

               “Oh, hey guys! Come on in,” he said. He led them to the lounge and Jungkook immediately got his homework out.

               “I was wondering if you could help me with this,” said Jungkook.

               “Sure, let’s see,” said Namjoon. Catalina wandered off. The upstairs was thankfully not as big as the main floor, but there were many halls and many rooms. Catalina went to Hoseok’s room, starting her search from there. The next door in the hallway was open. Catalina looked inside, flicking on the light switch. It looked like a basic, model bedroom. It didn’t look like it belonged to anyone, probably a guest room. The next room was enormous and absolutely trashed. The giant bed in the middle of the room had a mountain of blankets and clothes on it. Clothes, loose papers, and books littered the floor. Beat up, crooked antique paintings decorated the walls, along with torn calligraphy banners. The Asian style furniture looked ancient, worn and battered, but luxuriously wealthy.

               Catalina moved on to the next room. This one was a bit more modern and, curiously, vaguely nautical themed. A huge window against the back wall let light shine in on the white painted wood of the furniture, the mess of easels and canvases in the corner, and the mix of paintings on the seashell wallpapered walls: realism, abstract, cubism, a few charcoal sketches of Hoseok, Yoongi, and Namjoon, and a single painting of a lighthouse looking out at a stormy sea. Catalina went to the next room.

               This one was the most modern, with dark walls and mahogany furniture. It was sleek and rustic, with a twisted wood bed frame, alpaca rugs on the ground, smooth couches in the corner with a driftwood coffee table in the center, and along every free wall, bookshelves. The entire room was spotless. This must be Namjoon’s room. At least, Catalina hoped it was. She stepped inside and went to the desk tucked into one of the bookshelves. She rifled through the drawers until she found one filled with business cards.

               “Shit,” she whispered. There were quite a few cards, but she got to work sorting through them. Most of them looked old and yellowed with age. She automatically set those ones aside. She couldn’t remember that vampire’s name, but she knew she’d remember it if she saw it. After sorting through what felt like hundreds of cards, she finally found one with the familiar name on it.

               It was a new card, simple, with just a name, an address, and a phone number on it. The name on it was Makai La’ei. That sounded right. Catalina rearranged the rest of the cards back to how she found them and shoved this one in her pocket. She was definitely running out of time, Jungkook only had so much homework.

               When she got downstairs, she went right to the lounge, but it was empty. Jungkook’s French textbook was laying open on the coffee table. Her heart skipped a beat. Namjoon wouldn’t hurt him, would he? She thought. She backed out of the lounge and looked up and down the hallway. Her heart was pounding, but before her thoughts could fully run away on her, she heard Jungkook’s voice approaching, saying, “And that’s how I went to senior prom with Dr. Dre’s daughter, Truly.”

Namjoon and Jungkook rounded the corner, both holding McDonalds bags and hot coffees in their hands.

“You guys went out?” Catalina asked.

               “Yeah, we got hash browns,” said Namjoon, handing one of the bags to her.

               “Isn’t this yours?” asked Catalina.

               “Grease gives me a stomachache,” he said.

               “I was just craving hash browns. I figured you’d want a few too,” said Jungkook. Catalina’s heart skipped a beat, but this time not out of fear.

               “I love these,” she whispered, opening the greasy paper bag to see three hash browns inside. Something nudged her hand. She looked up to see Jungkook handing her his coffee as well. Namjoon wandered off, sipping at his own coffee. “What are you doing?”

               “I don’t like coffee,” he said. “Take it.”

               “Thank you,” she said. “Did you already finish your homework?”

               “Yeah, turns out Namjoon is fluent in French,” said Jungkook. “And Korean, and Chinese, and Japanese, and German. And…what was that other one?”

               “Swahili,” Namjoon said from inside the lounge.

               “Why?” asked Catalina.

               “I was bored,” he said with a shrug. Jungkook looked at Catalina with questioning eyes. Catalina nodded.

               “Well, thank you for helping me with this,” said Jungkook, gathering his textbook and notes. “I hate this class, so any help is much appreciated. Anyway, we have to get going. We have some errands to run.”

               “Sure, no problem,” said Namjoon as he walked them to the door. “We’re all fluent in French here, expect for Hoseok, so feel free to ask any of us any time.”

               “Thank you,” Catalina said as she pulled her shoes on.

~~~~~~~~~~

               “That was too easy,” said Jungkook as they were getting into his car.

               “Not really!” said Catalina. “He had a whole drawer full of business cards. I had to sort through all of them.”

               “I was talking about the homework,” said Jungkook. He pulled out of the driveway and began the drive down the mountain. “He gave me all the answers. But that explains why you were gone for so long.”

               “Yeah, and I saw the other rooms,” said Catalina. “I think Tae’s room is nautical themed.”

               “Why?” Jungkook asked. Catalina shrugged. “Well, whatever. Does that card have an address on it?”

               “Yeah,” Catalina pulled the card out of her pocket and typed the address into her maps app. It gave her a route to a location in the middle of the town. She let Siri lead them as she plugged in her phone and looked up spy music on iTunes. She found a playlist and put it on shuffle, letting the groovy guitar of “Secret Agent Man” blast through the car.

               By the time they arrived, they were well into “Hawaii Five-O”. The GPS had led them to what looked like an abandoned hospital. Jungkook drove a block past it so they could walk the rest of the way. As they walked, they reviewed the plan.

               “So, we can’t get caught, obviously,” said Jungkook. “We’re just sneaking in, taking a quick look, maybe some pictures, then getting out.”

               “Right,” said Catalina. “Quick and fast.”

They snuck in and found a basement stairwell, which they took. The rest of the hospital was empty. They could hear voices coming from the basement, so as quietly as they could, they snuck down the stairs, which led them to a cement tunnel with a metal grated floor. The tunnel gave Catalina a sense of Déjà vu, but she couldn’t figure out why. Faint voices echoed from the end of the tunnel. They reached the end and peaked around the corner. What they saw made their jaws drop. A huge, cavernous cement room with some furniture in the middle. Doors lined the walls, some open, some closed. Catalina could see from where she was that there were people in the rooms with open doors. People sitting or laying on the ground, tubes attached to their arms connecting to IV stands, blood bags hanging from the hooks.

Jungkook was snapping rapid fire pictures of as much of the room as they could see.

The voices, which were coming from a part of the room they couldn’t see, stopped talking.

“Bernard, go check the tunnel and stairs. I thought I heard something.”

Before Bernard even had a chance to move, Catalina and Jungkook booked it back down the tunnel and up the stairs. Jungkook led the way, and he was fast, so Catalina struggled to keep up with him. Once they were at the top of the stairs, they looked around for an open room. A bit down the hall, there was an open doorframe with a missing door. They darted for it, Jungkook pulling her inside and crowding her against the wall, hidden in the shadows.

Catalina was scared they’d be caught, but now she freaking out about something entirely different, namely, Jungkook’s chest and arms caging her against the wall. He was so close that Catalina could feel the heat coming off him. Her blush made its way down her neck into her chest, her breath quickening.

“He’s coming,” Jungkook whispered, his wide eyes glued to the doorway. Sure enough, Catalina could hear heavy boots crunching through the debris in the hallway, getting closer to where they were. “Do you trust me?”

“What?” Catalina asked.

“Do you trust me?” Jungkook asked again. “I saw this in a TV show. It works every time.”

Before Catalina could ask for clarification, several things happened at once: the man, presumably Bernard, began entering the room, Jungkook pressed even closer, a hand on her waist, the other finding its way to her hair, and his lips crashed against hers. She let out a squeak of surprise but quickly caught on, gripping his shirt and leaning into the kiss.

“Oh, for crying out loud,” a man’s voice said from the doorway. They broke apart and looked at him. “This is private property, guys. Get lost.”

“Sorry,” Jungkook said, flashing a sheepish smile. Bernard stepped aside to let them past, waving them in the direction of the exit. Even though her heart was still pounding out of her chest and her head was still spinning, Catalina made a point to check Bernard’s eyes. They were red.

On their way out, they heard the crackle of a walkie talkie and Bernard saying, “It was just some kids making out upstairs. This happens way too often, boss. We gotta start putting signs up or something.”

On their way to the car, Jungkook said, “That was a close one.”

“Was that just an excuse to kiss me?” Catalina joked, not sure she wanted to know the answer.

“It worked, didn’t it?” Jungkook said with a wink. Catalina blushed and shoved him.

“Shut up,” she said.

.

.

[minmotl]

Chapter 59: Sui Zhou Forbids Tang Fan From Hiding More Money

Context: 洛水古棺案 The Luo Shui Ancient Coffin Case - This happens after Tang Fan’s promotion and is his first major case after he successfully deals with people who don’t like him at his new job. The case happens at a riverside city called Bei Song (Northern Song). To the North of the city it faces Luo Shui (Luo River), and further up they will see the Yellow River. The town is built near the tomb of the Song Emperor, and while the town and tomb have to frequently deal with tomb raiders, everything is still pretty manageable and peaceful.

Recently, however, things have taken a turn for the stranger, and the courts have put Sui Zhou and Tang Fan on the case.

Before they embark on their next case together, however, some things have to first be ironed out, for example, the royalties from writing that Tang Fan gets but secretly hides from Sui Zhou.

Seeing how his ears are drooping downwards, Sui zhenfushi compassionately caresses at his friend’s head as if he would a dog, “I am not after your money. I just want to help you keep it. Who asked you to be so happy when you see books? We almost cannot stack them up anymore, you have to control yourself.”

Introduction Post | Masterpost

—

Highlights under the cut

Since a year ago, every day when it hits midnight, the civilians living nearby would hear some strange noises coming from Yong Hou Tomb and Yong Shao Tomb. At first, they thought it was the sound of the wind, but listening to it closely, they realised that those were crying sounds.

Yong Hou Tomb is where Song Ying Emperor Zhao Shu rests, and Yong Shao where Zong Ren Emperor Zhao Zhen rests.

Zhao Shu was Zhao Zhen’s successor, but he was not Zhao Zhen’s biological son, because all of Zhao Zhen’s sons died then, which left him with no choice but to take on Zhao Shu, who was from the royal family, as a charge.

These are not important, however. The question is, in the middle of the night, why would there be crying sounds from the royal tombs?

It has been so many years since the emperors from Song dynasty passed away and there are no longer any filial children or virtuous grandchildren. And even if there were, who would choose to cry for these lost souls in the middle of the night?

This is really strange.

The civilians in nearby villages have the responsibility of guarding and watching the tombs, and so after hearing the cries for a few consecutive nights, a few villagers went ahead to Yong Hou Tomb to investigate.

In the end, the people who went, never came back again.

It was only then that the village chief realised something was amiss - he urged other villagers to head forth to locate the missing people on one hand, and on the other, reported this to the Gong County Magistrate Court. Officials sent some men over and also searched thoroughly, but did not manage to find the people who disappeared. The royal tombs are built right next to the Luo River, and officials guessed that these people could have accidentally fallen into the river when they returned in the night.

With this conclusion, the case was wrapped up as well.

After that for a long time, the cries were never heard again. The village seemed to have its peace restored. Aside from those villagers who lost their loved ones, everyone slowly forgot about this incident.

But just half a year ago, those chilling wails emerged again and were louder than before, seemingly accompanied by the roar of thunder. The village chief did not dare to be careless about this and anxiously reported this to the courts again. The Gong County Magistrate thought that the village chief was making a fuss over something small, coming off the previous incident, and so did not think much of this. However, because the royal tombs are located there, he still got some of his officers to bring some men to the village and investigate.

This time, they found three tomb raiding holes near both the tombs of Yong Hou and Yong Shao. It seemed that tomb raiders had their eyes on these two emperors’ resting places, and came for a visit. Regarding the royal tomb being stolen from, the magistrate did not dare to be careless either. And so, he ordered the officers and also six of the strongest and younger men from the village to stake out the royal tombs nearby, hoping to catch the tomb raiders.

Everything was quiet in the surroundings of the royal tombs as the first day passed. The moonlight was like water, and next to them, aside from the sound of the Luo River water flowing, nothing else was heard. Everything was peaceful. The same happened on the second day.

And on the third day, crisis struck.

Three officers, six villagers and the village chief, when they went, they were 10 people in total.

At the end, only two returned.

One of them was an officer, and the other was the village chief.

The first went mad, and the second turned dumb.

The one who went mad was the officer. The village chief and he ran back from nearby the royal tombs, one after the other, and he was incoherent. Whoever he saw, he would try to hit, not to mention saying anything while being in a clear state of mind. The village chief’s expression was filled with horror, and his body drenched in fresh blood. His state of mind was almost that of the officer’s.

After the prognosis of the physician, he concluded that the officer has probably been frightened to the point of insanity. He would probably like this for the rest of his life as there is no cure for it. Although the village chief is old and of dwindling strength, he did experience more things in life and instead, was more resilient than the young officer. After a period of rest, his mental state slowly improved.

However, whenever the happenings of that night were mentioned, the village chief could not be more silent and reluctant to say anything more. It was not until the magistrate himself came over to question him that the man began repeatedly chanting ‘it’s a ghost’ and ‘there’s a monster’ - words related to that. No matter how much they asked, they could not get anything substantive out of him.

The magistrate was out of ideas but also felt that this situation was strange, and so had no choice but to get the investigation reported to higher authorities until it reached Jing city.

“Ghost? Monster?”

In their small courtyard, Tang Fan considers both words and asks, “Could it be the tomb raiders pretending to be ghosts?”

Sui Zhou shakes his head, “I’ve also only just gotten this case. It’s very difficult to ascertain the accuracy of the magistrate’s report just by his words, we will have to head down there personally to make judgement. This happened in the jurisdiction of Henan, and I suspect it will be handed to the Department of Justice for an investigation, and then after that, it’ll also land on the head of the Henan’s Qing Li Si.

Tang Fan laughs bitterly, “That seems like a definite possibility.”

He stretches lazily, “Might as well. Anyway, I naturally have fidgety bones and cannot bear to be so leisurely. I’ve gotten tired of sitting in the courts, and if given the chance, I’d rather go out for a walk!”

Sui Zhou says in a low voice, “I also plan to go personally.”

Tang Fan is flattered, “It cannot be, Sui zhenfushi would like to fight by my side? This is truly this lowly official’s honour!”

Although Sui Zhou is officially only a qianhu, he has become the boss of the Northern Administrative Court in reality. Any higher up than him would be Yuan Bin, so between officials, everyone is already used to calling him “Sui zhenfushi”.

Of course, hearing Tang Fan call him that, the title sounds a little more like (light teasing) mockery than anything else.

Sui Zhou leans into the chair, and taking the cup of buckwheat tea from Ah Dong, he says lightly, “Fighting side by side, maybe not so much. Since I am the zhenfushi, I naturally have to handle all matters. For a small Rank Five official like you, you’ll have to listen to my commands then too.”

Of course, these words are coloured with mirth, as he says it like a joke.

Tang Fan laughs, “Then I’ll have to fight for that with you. You’re a Rank Five army official, and I’m a Rank Five civil official. Since the Ming dynasty came into being, it is always civil officials commanding army officials. If we follow the principle of a Rank Five civil official being allowed to command a Rank Four army official, even if your big boss Yuan came, I’m afraid he would still have to listen to my orders. Otherwise, for someone who as physically unfit as me, what will I do if I go? I can’t possibly head up personally to catch the criminals myself, right?”

He winks at Ah Dong, “Isn’t that right, sister?”

Ah Dong nods, “Yes.”

Tang Fan puts up his leg and proudly says to Sui Zhou, “It’s really good to have a sister, see how considerate my Ah Dong is!”

Ah Dong goes, “I’m saying that Sui-dage is right.”

Tang Fan is dissatisfied, “Why do you always favour the outsider?!”

“Of course I have to side with the outsider. Da-ge, all your money is now in Sui-dage’s hands. Without him, we’d both be homeless!!” she laughs.

Tang Fan retorts, “What do you mean by all?! I only gave him half, don’t I still give you grocery cash every month?!”

Sui Zhou then asks, “So tell us how much money you have on hand right now?”

With both of them staring at him with their four eyes, Tang Fan stammers, “A man’s savings is a secret, you can’t just ask like that!”

Ah Dong then asks Sui Zhou, “Sui-dage, how much money do you have?”

Sui Zhou doesn’t say that she cannot ask, and very honestly says, “I helped him to save 30 taels last year, and then together with the 350 taels he gave me previously, that’s 380 taels. I also have some savings from before, and together it totals up to 1400 taels.”

Ah Dong gaps, “Sui-dage you’re so rich!”

Tang Fan huffs twice in awkward laughter, “The weather is really great today! That dumpling dish has been left alone for too long and it’s waiting for us to eat then. How low class is it to speak about money, our mouths full of the stench of copper!”

Ah Dong covers her mouth as she laughs, “You hid your writing royalties under your pillows and did not submit it. And here I was wondering how long you’d hide it for, but in a flash, you went to buy another stack of useless novels!”

Tang Fan, embarrassed, says, “What do you mean useless books! That is Spring and Autumn, a Song dynasty publication that people can’t buy even if they have money. I only got it after looking out for the book of so long!”

Ah Dong blinks, “Well, there’s another one called The Legend of Chun Chao.”

Sui Zhou frowns, “Why does that name sound a little strange?”

“That’s a proper book on demons, don’t think so much!” he says, guilty.

If he didn’t say anything, that would still be okay, but the more he explains, the stranger it sounds.

“Give it to me so I can have a look later,” Sui Zhou says.

Ah Dong sticks out her tongue at Tang Fan, “I want to see it too!”

Tang-daren feels immense pain, “You took the manuscript for Aspirations of War previously and you haven’t returned it to me yet!”

Although Tang-daren does spend his free time writing fiction books as a way to pass the time and also to get some writing royalties as well, to say that all he writes is erotica fiction, this is truly an injustice to him. Take Aspirations of War for example, he reflected the history of the years of war during the Eastern Zhou period, but because the content is complex, he often does not have time to write it. Only now does he have two-thirds of it finished.

Innocently, Sui Zhou says, “I’m not done reading it yet, I’ll return it to you when I’m done.”

“And when will you finish it?”

“When you promise not to secretly hide your royalties,” Sui Zhou answers.

Tang-daren is so angry right now that he feels like he is capable of doing anything, as he expresses his objections and dissatisfaction at these unfair standards.

“Well you didn’t give me the money either!”

“But I don’t have a habit of spending money unnecessarily,” Sui Zhou’s explanation ends the argument.

“…”

His pride slides to the ground and shatters.

He’s rising up in the ranks as an official, but when he comes home, his status gets increasingly lower! Let him live!

He wants to run away from home…

Seeing how his ears are drooping downwards, Sui zhenfushi compassionately caresses at his friend’s head as if he would a dog, “I am not after your money. I just want to help you keep it. Who asked you to be so happy when you see books? We almost cannot stack them up anymore, you have to control yourself.”

Tang-daren’s face is filled with tears.

===

Notes:

*胳膊往外拐 ge bo wang wai guai

Literally means using your elbow to reach out and hook onto someone else - As a metaphor it means to side with outsiders instead of your closest friends or family.

*满嘴铜臭味 man zui tong chou wei

Literally means for one’s mouth to smell like the rotten stench of copper - as a metaphor it means that it is not good practice or manners to speak about money the way they are talking to each other.

*春潮记 chun chao ji

Sui Zhou is so scandalized when Ah Dong mentions this book - The Legend of Chun Chao, and that’s because when you break the characters down: Spring (chun), tide (chao) and legend/records (ji)

chun also can mean youth or a time of canoodling of sorts

chao can also have a sexual connotation, i.e. to climax

And that’s why he is like “that sounds strange” when Ah Dong reads the title out, and this book is in fact an old story about demons, but the more Tang Fan denies it, the more guilty he sounds basically.

[yesterdaysanswers]

Disco-Test • Flavio Premoli (PFM) • Ciao 2001 (date unknown, sometime in 1977?)

(as always, thanks to @quantumabyss6​ for helping with this!)

translation:

The second guest of the new series disco-test is the keyboardist of Premiata Forneria Marconi. For Premoli we played ten records: he had to recognize them or otherwise comment on them. We started with the "Star Wars" soundtrack (playing Meco) and with Philip Glass and the latest Bowie to talk about experimental keyboards and the future of music. So, to focus on the current keyboards, especially the American ones, we proposed Jan Hammer, Joe Zawinul (two European emigrants) without the Weather Report and the Crusaders. Flavio also listened to ex-Yes Patrick Moraz, the Animals to talk about the Sixties, and among the groups operating in Italy, the newly dissolved Perigeo and the newly formed Kim & the Cadillac. Here are the things that Premoli told us during the “session"...

MECO 

Cantina band / The last battle (from the LP “Star wars and other galactic funk”)

-I really have no idea who it is. I find it extremely nice, danceable, it could be a Barry White song without vocals, because of the violins, the huge orchestration. Wait, one thing comes to mind... it could be "Star wars". Yes. I haven't seen the film: I don't like science fiction, unlike my group mates, who overwhelm me with comics and the like.

-In “Star wars”, this piece is played by a spatial orchestra in a sort of tavern. What will music be like in the future?

-Extremely electronic; it already is today, but it will lead to excess. Maybe there will be a musician who will play everything, with strange machines at his disposal.

-And maybe they will all be programmed robots and computers. In "Star wars", at least, the figure of the musician has remained: will the depersonalization not be total?

-Anything could happen. In 10 or 20 years, we may have a computer capable of playing any instrument, and perhaps simulating the arm of the disk-jockey putting on the discs, so we won't even need him. But let's remember that there are always courses and appeals: once the disco was made for playing records, then the live musicians arrived, now it's back to the record again, above all for reasons of cost. The "Star wars" night complexion is an exceptional gimmick, and a sign of hope: because it maintains the figure of man in a largely mechanized climate.

PHILIP GLASS

Etoile polaire (from the LP “North Star”)

-Beautiful! I'm thinking, waiting for what happens. I don't know how to describe this music: I would say "a very tense peace". It seems to me a musically old speech. I like the idea of ​​the choir. I have always loved the choruses of human voices, like at the beginning of "L'isola di niente", written by me. Philip Glass? No, I've never heard of him.

-How do you think you can use electronic tools while maintaining personality and creativity?

-I am opposed to a type of electronics that is too complex. I tried the polymoog, technically of impressive quality, but I’ll never play it, because it allows little room for creativity, while the smaller electronic instruments, perhaps because of their size, are built to be as expressive as possible. From "Jet lag" onwards, I used the micromoog, much less cold than the others, with the digital possibility of making the notes vibrate: not at a predetermined frequency amplitude, but according to the pressure of the hand, like the finger on the cello. The same goes for small ARPs. Among electronic musicians, I prefer the Japanese, Tomita. Then there is a wonderful piece on Stanley Clark's "School Days": and I discovered that Herbie Hancock is playing the moog, on a bluesy harmonic loop. I also like how Corea uses the micromoog in "My spanish heart”.

DAVID BOWIE

Neuköln (from the LP “Heroes”)

-It sounds like a pan hit with something soft. They are all atmospheric records… however, the sax is very beautiful, it is very modern and at the same time old. I know it's not them, but it reminded me of Eddy Busnello with Area. If Demterio's voice came out at this point, I wouldn't be surprised.

-It's David Bowie.

-Bowie is a great artist. This music could represent well on stage. If it is credible? Well, it goes from one side to the other with ease, from space to everything in its head, it is not a definable, well circumscribed one.

-On this album he worked a lot with Eno, ex-Roxy Music. How much Eno do you think there is in Bowie's piece?

-We could say that there is more Eno as a musician, and more Bowie as an image.

JAN HAMMER

Oh, yeah (from the LP of the same name)

-It seems English to me, but I don't know who it is. The fact is, I never listen to records...

-Don't worry, that’s what everyone says when they undergo the disco-test.

-I don't mind the piece, but it doesn't make me jump in my chair. I like the taste, and the phrasing with which it misleads you. I think it's a Moog guitar, or a synthesizer.

-To be precise it is a combination of a minimoog and an Oberheim, and it is Jan Hammer, ex-Mahavishnu Orchestra. What is the most experimental effect you have tried with PFM?

-I don't know, I'm not a daring one. I would say the sixteen superimposed moogs, in "Il banchetto". Remember that it's been four years already.

JOE ZAWINUL

From Vienna with love (from the LP “Concerto retitled”)

-It is not Jarrett, I exclude. It has a kind of harmony reminiscent of the Weather Report, but I don't know if Zawinul has ever done things by himself, with the piano and the orchestra. Yes, it could be him. The thing that makes Zawinul unmistakable is the underlying texture in the group, which is not grasped on first listen if you are not a keyboard player; however he is a monster: he does very difficult things and yet they seem easy, they arrive, they communicate. Unlike others who pretend to be difficult, and in any case incomprehensible things, rather easy effects.

In short, Zawinul convinces both the technicians and the public.

-Hammer is Czechoslovakian, Zawinul is Austrian. How do you explain so many European talents, especially in the East?

-I think there is an incredible tradition in those countries. This is all the reason.

PERIGEO

New Vienna (from the LP “Non è poi così lontano”)

-It sounds like another movie music. Is it Chick Corea?

-No, we went from Zawinul's "old" Vienna to someone else's "new" Vienna.

-Wait, I think I have understood. He is one of those Americans: they all sound alike. Listening to them for two minutes on the electric piano is not enough to recognize them. It could be both Hammer and Hancock.

-It’s actually someone from Trentino, Franco D'Andrea, with the Perigeo.

-I have never heard their records. I know they have now broken up. And I think with their kind of music it's hard to stay afloat. Our rock-jazz, the experimental one in "Jet-lag" is watered-down. This Perigeo album seems to me a very good thing. But did it sell?…

KIM & THE CADILLACS

Come on baby (dance the twist) (from the LP “Rock’n’roll”)

-This, however, I do not like at all. It could be 20 years old. If it’s that old, then it makes sense that it exists, but if the record is new, then I don't agree: how do you get the same stuff and 100% rearrangement? It takes three million to make such a record. I would do it all by myself with a Revox. But it doesn't sell. It is not a "Crocodile rock", which despite being poor compared to Elton John's repertoire, had some remarkable ideas.

-They are some former Renegades, the group is brand new. What do you remember about rock'n'roll?

-Nothing, I was eight at the time. I remember the Renegades at the Sanremo festival. In Sanremo, Francone Mussida and I played hidden behind the amplifiers instead of other band players. But these things are better untold.

CRUSADERS

It happens everyday (from the LP “Free as a wind”)

-At first it seemed like McCoy Tyner, then the sax made me change my mind. It seems to me far less modern than Tyner.

-This is the album that remained at the top of the American jazz charts for five months, until October. Do you think it deserved it?

-It is beautiful, pleasant. Knowing the US market, I think it makes sense that it has been very successful. It's jazzy, yet easy to listen to.

-It's The Crusaders. What do you say about the many jazzmen who are now making disco music?

-I talked to some of them. They do it for the dough, the dollars. There is no other explanation. It's all very simple.

PATRICK MORAZ

Out in the sun (from the LP of the same name)

-This is already a fresh thing, well done, without too many pretensions, pleasant to listen to. I've heard it before, but I don't remember who it is. American? British?

-No, he's Swiss.

-Moraz? Then it's the new album. It is good. Mind you, nothing particular, but for what he did with Yes he must be considered a worker consistent with the music of the moment, one who knows how to adapt. The best things about Yes are still "Fragile" and part of "Close to the edge", even if Rick Wakeman, alone, I never liked.

-By the way, do you remember the old and sterile controversy between Emerson and Wakeman? How would you solve it?

-In my opinion, Keith Emerson is far better. Think of what will remain of one, such as "Tarkus", and what will remain of the other. The fact that Emerson has recently done a few things that are not always convincing does not affect the judgment: however, I would not even have stimulated the controversy between the two.

ANIMALS 

It’s all over now, baby blue (from the album “Before we were so rudely interrupted”)

-The piece is famous? Typical music that sells in America. Is it Rolling? Is it from the Animals? How he sings, guys!

-What were you listening to in the 60s?

-My favorite were the Beatles, who influenced me a lot, creatively speaking. Then the Rolling, the Who and the Animals.

-So why don't you recognize him? This is Eric Burdon, and the song was by Bob Dylan.

-Burdon was one of my favorites. A record like this can still be successful. If I did it again, it would be a laugh.

-To conclude, which keyboard players have influenced you the most?

-In the 60’s, I would say Jimmy Smith, and of course the jazz pianists, for example, Erroll Garner and Oscar Peterson. At the time of the first Award, I would say Emerson, from which, for better or for worse, everyone has drawn. But don't forget that my background is classic.

[writerightthings]

Sudden Farewell

[Charlie]

The last time I saw my mother was the day she left us. First thing I recall from that day is how bright the sun was when I woke. I remember this because I barely take notice of the weather, but that day it was like the sun waking me up with that bright and blazing temperature. As usual, I went to wake my sister up so she could get ready for school. Waking Sarah up became my daily routine since I moved my work close to her school. It is always very frustrating to wake a 17 years old teenager, because they are never really nice to you in the morning. After being on a morning call for about six months, I realized that playing her favorite music on the speaker to the maximum volume is the best way to wake her up without facing her morning temper.

Right after I checked Sarah going into her bathroom to get ready, I went down to the kitchen to get my breakfast. Now that I look back on that day, it was odd that I didn’t drink my daily orange juice. Usually my mother prepared freshly squeezed orange juice every night and put it in the refrigerator for us to drink every morning. However, I missed it. Maybe I was running out of time because Sarah got up late or I just forgot to open the refrigerator. I should probably ask Sarah if she had orange juice that day.

After getting ready to go to work, I picked my car keys and yelled at Sarah to wait outside. As I stood in front of the stairs, I checked my parents room to say goodbye. Unlike usual, it seemed like they were asleep so I skipped saying goodbye and texted my mother instead in the car that I had dropped Sarah off to her school safely.

As I was entering my company’s parking lot, that is when I received a phone call from my father. I remember this clearly, because my phone rang so loud as if it was about to explode. I picked up my phone rapidly and heard my father crying for the first time in my life. I became anxious right away. I am the person who gets fretful when my daily routine is interrupted or changed due to any reason. I just can’t stand it. I was very worried about my father crying, but at the same time, I was sweating and my hands on the steering wheel were shaking. However, all this stopped immediately after hearing my father’s voice: “Where is your mother? Is she with you?”  I had to stop my car on the side. She was missing again. I literally saw her sleeping this morning, but apparently she went missing the next second. I got scared. I checked my text and saw that she hasn’t replied to my earlier text as well. I told my father to calm down and call her friends or my aunts to see if they are with her. From my father’s deep voice, I could tell that he was extremely worried. I then called the police.

[Sarah]

The last time I saw my mother was the night before she went missing. We had a small talk in the kitchen till late at night. I think it was around 12:20 P.M when we went to bed. We talked about my soccer game that was planned for next week. As I became a captain of the team, I felt very pressured in winning so my mom came to cheer me up. But that was all. She seemed very fine and normal that night. My only guess is that she went to my aunts’ house to see grandma.

On the day she went missing, I remember waking up to my favorite morning song, Viva La Vida by Coldplay. It was tough to get up from the bed since I slept late that night. However, I knew that Charlie would soon yell at me to wake up so I had to wake my body up and move to the bathroom. After getting ready for school, I started packing for soccer training. I remember asking my mom about my soccer uniform, but since she didn’t reply I went down to check the dryer and found them there. One thing that I missed that day was my orange juice. Usually I grab my orange juice on the way out and drink it in the car, but strangely I had milk instead. Maybe I should have doubted that moment and asked Charlie about it. Maybe if I did something differently about that missing orange juice, my mom will be here with us today.

I heard the news that afternoon from my soccer coach. He came up to me and told me to my dad. So I did. I called my dad and he was on the phone with someone. I had to call Charlie again and he told me that I should finish my training and come back home early as soon as possible. The last thing he said was that I don’t have to worry about anything, because it will all be “fine”. Although I was preparing for the soccer game, my mind was full of worries. I wanted to know what was going on, because Charlie and dad never tell me things straightforward since they think I am too young to handle things like an adult.

I’m trying to stay calm this time. There were a couple of times that my mother has gone missing. Most of the time, she was at her friends or my aunt's house and she forgot to bring her phone. I just want to believe that she is somewhere enjoying her time with her friends.

[Steve]

The last time I saw my wife was in the dawn of the day she had gone missing. I remember waking up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and she was asleep next to me. I used to fall asleep really deep before everything happened, but now I unconsciously wake up in the middle of the night to check on my wife. Checking my wife asleep and using the bathroom became my habit ever since last summer.

When I came back from the bathroom, she woke up and said hi. Then my wife also used the bathroom and we fell asleep again. When I woke up in the morning to get ready for the day, she was already gone. My wife is usually a morning person and she tries to greet kids when they head out. However, that day she was missing.

I have never told this story to my kids, but there are some things that I wish I had done differently. Last summer, when my wife came back from her sister’s place, it felt like I was facing a different person. I have dated my wife for 7 years and we were married for 21 years, so I can proudly say that I know her better than anyone. However, that day she was different. My wife is usually a very quiet, shy, and caring person and that day she was extremely talkative. She seemed very excited about something and she asked me for a conversation. When I sat down to have a conversation with her, she looked straight into my eyes and asked if she could get two weeks vacation. Ever since we got married, we have never been apart for more than a week. It was very sudden for me, so I asked her to give me some time to think about it. Of Course I wanted her to get her own time, but I guess I was just not ready to happily tell her to go. Nonetheless, she was gone the next day without any notice. For two weeks, we couldn’t get hold of her and the only way we could check if she was okay was from her sister. Two weeks later, she gave us a phone call and told us that she was fine. She finally came back home after three weeks. My wife never really told us the exact reason why she left in such a hurry, where and what she was doing for three weeks. Everything remains a mystery for me. I thought I knew everything about her. When she came back from her long vacation, she was just the same woman I knew.

It feels different this time. I told Charlie to call the police, because I just couldn’t do it by myself. If I do call the police, it feels like I am admitting that something terrible has happened to her. I just cannot believe that she went missing again. I wish I could talk to her and ask her. Maybe I was too ignorant about her happiness so she left to be more herself. I don’t want to believe in anything bad. I wish I can go back to that night when we had our first talk. Wherever she is, I pray that she is safe and happy. I miss her very much.

[loveurn]

ego.

@principalles​ //

i.

‘well he is the most wanted single man of his company, handsome, womanizer, ceo' is what she’d said. she being seonhee, one of the girls who worked in the advertisement sector of their branch. sooyoung made it her job to know everyone each time she walked in the break room, as being assistant meant she had to deliver the awful news of another overnight project or a proposal that needed revising. 

that also meant she was in charge of delivering the news of about the company retreat to everyone. the weather was getting hotter and the offices were getting stuffier and somehow the rooftop lunch breaks didn’t do it for anyone anymore. people were stuffy and cranky and sooyoung’s lovely director suggested taking everyone go on a retreat near jeju island, enjoy the beach for a little and celebrate a successful fashion week.

everyone meaning the proposal was given to other departments as well and sooyoung was busy for delivering the impulsive news. to where seonhee asked if she had anyone else to ask and she showed her extensive list of directors, assistants, departments. that’s when dylan’s name was spotted, someone sooyoung planned on asking alter as she knew he had a packed schedule today. that had brought laughter, and seonhee’s insistence that dylan would never come and not to waste her time.

to which sooyoung is once again enlightened by how much the break room seems to know about dylan though she spends a lot of time outside the office. the dylan who is always suggesting they go out places ( for research ) and sooyoung always insisting he needs his rest.

so color her confused and that’s when the response comes.

‘that’s why he wouldn’t come out to a retreat, it’s prime territory for the hawks to pounce.’ “excuse me the hawks?”  ‘every department with a single young woman who just got her swimsuit body ready.’

to which sooyoung doesn’t understand the purpose of showing off a beach bod to a ceo when they’ll still have assignments during the retreat, and dylan will most likely be surrounded by his team and his associates but - that’s not her business. her business is technically just to deliver the news and be about her day. but every time she’s in the break room there’s something else happening. and it’s always more interesting than the dozen coffees she needs to pre-made for her boss who drinks them like water but always wants them a second into room temperature. 

‘though, it’s something guys thrive off, maybe he’ll attend.’ “which is?” ‘ego sooyoung-ah, e-g-o. they love having their ego stroked.’

at this point sooyoung’s taken to just texting people about the news since obviously seonhee has more she wants to tell her about everything she knows regarding the retreat that hasn’t happened and the questions she hasn’t asked.

[ sent: dylan ] director cho wants everyone to take the following weekend off for a retreat to busan beach resort. please click the link to rsvp if you’d like to go! once you’re confirmed you will receive a message from me regarding the itinerary. message me for any questions you might have!

“ego,” she really should brush up on her english again. ‘here listen to this while you finish your errands today.’ seonhee’s typing a song into her phone, sooyoung’s surprised that she already has it, and also surprised that dylan is responding to her when she knows he has a meeting in,

negative ten minutes.

[ received: dylan ] are you going? she also has two more floors to cover before her own meeting begins.

‘sooyoung-ah.’ seonhee’s calling to her as messages flood her phones, rsvp’s and questions alike. ‘make sure to tell dylan you’re going, bet that’ll change things.’

[ sent: dylan ] yeah i’ll be assisting with whatever company bonding shots the director wants. and finishing her unfinished tasks. why? did you need me in the city?

“yeah okay.” that’s one side of beak room gossip she’s not about to get in on.

her phone pings.

RSVP INCOMING! [ received: dylan ] i’ll drive us.

before sooyoung can explain to him why he will not be driving her, she’s headed out the door and engaging more employees in the news of their upcoming trip.

ii.

so sooyoung spends the time planning the trip. helping to plan what catering they might need for the beach parties, the reservations for the rsvp’s and the occasional people who change minds last minute. arranging and making sure everyone has accurate transportation and reports are in way before deadlines so that no one’s blaming midnight parties on missing deadlines and director cho is ripping their ass in a lobby during the breakfast bar. it’s happened and sooyoung would rather not wake up to that level of damage control. she’d had to play nice with the barista that morning to assure this was normal and she lived a decent life as an intern.

all the while, the song seonhee recommended occasionally makes it way to her headphones, catching her off-guard. but beyonce is always a good choice whether she’s finally reaching home late after finishing up reports or going over designs in her director’s office.

what sooyoung doesn’t do is spend too much time thinking over what’s said in the break room. it’s usually gossip that’s spawned from an inability to completely detach themselves from work. those who can’t find it in them to work how they should outside the break room find themselves struggling to make the workplace more than it is. not that seonhee is doing that - but as far as gossip is concerned, that’s what it is. 

sooyoung listens, learns and then goes about her day. she’ll mull over it when she has time to think about anything other than her assignments. but at that point it’s late and she’s about to smash her face in a pillow.

that’s when the lyrics play over again. 

It's too big (big) It's too wide (wide) It's too strong (strong)

seonhee’s words ring next ‘men like having their egos stroked’. visions of dylan in the suit they make sure is tailored perfectly.

sooyoung’s sure that she doesn’t need to brush up on her english but maybe, just maybe she needs to check her understanding of the word. there’s an incoming message from dylan making sure she’s made it home safe and once again solidifying that he’s going to drive her to the hotel.

with the lyrics playing in her head sooyoung makes it a point to get him to promise he will attend his morning meeting and meet up with everyone at the hotel afterwards. she’s somewhat thankful that her boss requested her to meet the team early to do head counts and review the hotel reservations. sooyoung goes to sleep with beyonce’s declaration, glimpses of the laughing emoji from dylan as well as the unwelcome sound of how it’d sound beside her resounding in her head.

iii.

sooyoung gets the appeal. 

she’s never not understood the appeal she’s just always found it easier to focus on other things. dylan was attractive. figuratively, metaphorically, subjectively, objectively, literally, every -ly that could be thought of. he was attractive and everyone in the break room and the whole of seoul knew that. everyone at fashion week knew that and now everyone at the busan resort who didn’t know, would know.

not for the way the interns would flit past him when eh’d entered the establishment. not for the way sooyoung had to call attention to the assistants who still had things to check before their three day vacation could begin. not for the way the hotel front desk associate stumbled over her words when he’d asked if his room was ready, and subsequently gave him the best room ( as if sooyoung hadn’t assured he had it anyway but whatever ).

they know because it’s obvious. it’s obvious because he’s shown up to the resort in nothing more than slacks, a button up and shades and he’s commanding attention. he’s the ceo without ever opening his mouth and declaring. things magnetize towards him without so much of a grin and boy when the grin comes.

it’s impossible for people not to know that he is the most single, most sought-after, bachelor if not in the company, in the vast collection of men his age and his status. 

even the bellboys are staring in awe.

until sooyoung’s reminding them who her director is and they need to take her bags up before she returns from begging the barista to open the day bar. 

‘what floor are you?’ if dylan means it to be whispered he fails at that. and if sooyoung asks like she’s not surprised by the sudden onslaught of his cologne and well - stature, she does a terrible job. because dylan doesn’t wear particularly overbearing perfume cologne, just something subtle enough to say what it needs to. that he takes care of himself and his bathroom is probably worth more her entire apartment complex. either way, the good news is that everyone has headed up to their rooms, or to the beach. the bad news is that her only escape to the embarrassment that she’d squeaked - yes squeaked, is the elevator opening and sooyoung scurrying in.

of course with dylan following.

laughing, a sound that bounces off the elevator walls and has one target, only one and it’s each and every pore on sooyoung’s skin. every hair on her neck, every breath when she watches him reach for his number to press. and she knows, she knows he’s asking her what floor she is and it takes a few seconds to properly respond. because hm, was everything about him proportioned so well? but she responds before her thoughts make their way out her mouth.

“director cho needed me close so, right below you.” ‘easy for you to visit then right?’

and all responses that are usually so easy and quick when they’re in the office become stuck. stuck and then it’s silent. it’s silent and then the she forgets her headphones are still playing and the same lyrics play louder than she’d remembered them.

It won't fit (fit) It's too much (much) It's too tough (tough)

and she’s swallowing quick when dylan’s eyes land on her. sooyoung’s suddenly aware of her own entire, on how flushed she seems when she catch her her reflection in the elevator doors. a peasant blouse and jeans. off the shoulder and with the sleeves barely clinging to her shoulders and the red blush that definitely isn’t from the sun sticking to her cheeks.

she’s aware of, how small the elevator is. how dylan’s height is one of his strongest points. how the strongest might be the smile, the one that she thinks she sees it more than anyone else at the office can attest to. and then she doesn’t want to think about why. why it’s so blinding and why this elevator is small and her lips feel like they don’t know what they should do. 

‘sooyoung?’ 

she’s brought back by the sight of her floor, and dylan watching, waiting.

‘see you tonight?’ and there’s a question in that, one hidden by the laughter that follows it after. and he’s smug because sooyoung’s sure, that for the first time in a while, she’s been occupied by the very thing that halts voices and girls at front desks alike.

“yeah i’ll be there!”

she’s greeted by a friendly text the minute she’s out the shower, and picking an outfit for the bonfire.

[ received: dylan ] didn’t know you were a beyonce fan?

and sooyoung wants to crawl under her blanket and scream but her room is soon taken over by co-workers ready to get ready for the starting bonfire. a tradition, to ensure that the weekend is full of fun and no work, they commemorate by getting shit-faced by the beach and keeping the stories a secret for the next bonfire a year later.

sooyoung’s heard tales but the excitement is enough to have the girls barging in her room to get changed, and help her because quote ‘i doubt you’ll actually pull out the outfits we suggested’.

iv.

one knit top, black shorts and knee-high boots later and sooyoung is already through with the night. but the party’s just started and everyone is attendance. can barely make it to a meeting on time but they’re bright and early for the bonfire, even early to account for all the drinks and even buy extra if there wasn’t enough.

typical.

the breeze from the beach makes up for the heat from the bonfire and the excitement makes up for the long week they’ve had and the long hours put into making sure this ran smoothly.

‘can’t believe he came.’

seonhee’s leaning against her, watching from where dylan chats with his team and fellow co-workers ( as she’d predicted ) the older members, the directors. because a retreat doesn’t mean all business ends even if assistants like to think so. the girls stand to the side, the newer interns mostly, waiting for their chance. they’ll have a better chance for their own superiors before chancing at dylan.

‘you’re right.’

sooyoung of course had said that slight aloud but she doesn’t regret it. she sips at the champagne and watches dylan in the same way that the others do. just observing, taking in the presence he commands even when he laughs, it’s another way in which he works and it’s so efficiently done she doesn’t know how he juggles it all. how he manages it so effortlessly. it’s admirable.

‘oh? this is new.’

sooyoung needs to put down this glass now before her mouth opens again.

“i just think he looks nice like this.” ‘with his sleeves pulled up and his hair back?’ “relaxed, seonhee relaxed.” ‘it’s okay to have the hots sooyoung-ie, everyone does.’

and for reasons unrelated to the champagne, sooyoung’s face colors again.

‘go stroke the ego a bit.’ “seonhee!”

but seonhee’s pushing her off, in the exact moment the crowd disperses as people head for the beach. girls ready to draw their boss’ attention move to strip and get as wet as possible in the water and sooyoung, sooyoung comes face to face with dylan.

dylan who, maybe it’s the bonfire, or the moonlight but his smile has sooyoung catching her breath. 

v.

‘having fun?’

she’s discarded her shoes when they start walking, enjoying the grounding feeling of the sand. the sound of co-workers screaming in delight, in joy at freedom.

“you’re not supposed to work on vacations.” comes her response. she’s not scolding him, and she doesn’t look up from watching the imprints her feet make in the sand. mainly because looking up means catching all that dylan has to offer and she’s not about that right now. 

what she means is, you’re not supposed to look this good relaxing.

‘really?’

oh god no.

‘i didn’t think i was working.’

thank god.

“maybe i’m so used to you working then, it looked like it.” ‘that’s not good, i try to work less when it’s the two of us.’

jesus christ.

sooyoung’s not cold but there’s goosebumps rising on her skin and she fights the urge to itch at them, to calm them down and keep the warmth from spreading to her cheeks from sheer will alone. they’ve walked a considerable distance from the bonfire, she can still hear the fun, the music but it’s slowly fading in favor of the waves and the sound of their feet.

“i think it comes with the position.” it’s a whisper. just like the sound of his laughter, closer than it should be, the feeling of fabric on her shoulders. and a touch as light as that.  ‘should we go back? you look cold?’ but there’s a shake of her head since words are going to fail her, they always fail her. instead sooyoung grips the edges and keeps walking. so dylan follows along. if she doesn’t focus on how her mind’s been betraying her lately, it’s nice.

maybe it’s the silence, maybe its the comfort that she always slips into when she’s around him that brings the comfort. maybe it’s the glass of wine that she probably shouldn’t have asked be refilled. 

“when we walk back the new interns are going to lose it.” ‘is that so?’ it’s half of a hum, half a response and sooyoung can hear the smile, see it out the corner of her eye. she dares not look up or she’ll lose her train of thought. wherever it comes from, she rolls with it for now, nothing to judge her really but the moon following them along. “they love it, i’m sure you know that.” ‘are you saying i love the attention?’ “no! no, i’m saying, well, guys know that.” ‘hm? guys know what sooyoung?’

when they’re so gorgeous it’s unfair.

sooyoung knows she mutters it, but she tries so hard to keep it under her breath. she tries, even pulls his button-up closer to where it might muffle it.

‘you’re surprisingly candid tipsy. it’s cute.’ “i’m not tipsy!” ‘yeah? you haven’t let go on of me though.’

that’s - unfortunately true. and the revelation doesn’t cause any changes really because if sooyoung tries to pull away it results in her just holding tighter on his arm. she won’t look up though, not yet. 

“it’s an ego thing right?” ‘ego, the song you like?’ “it was recommended!”

it comes out as whine, immediate and reactive. embarrassed as she may be, as much as she wants to curl in and head right back to the bonfire, sooyoung holds her ground. even if that means staring at the ground because she knows they’ve stopped walking and dylan’s full attention is on her now. much like the way people always tease her that it is. in a way that she knows if she were to look up she wouldn’t be able to handle. 

It's too big (big) It's too wide (wide) It's too strong (strong) It won't fit (fit) It's too much (much) It's too tough (tough)

so listen, sooyoung’s been attracted to guys before. she’s had crushes so intense they’ve filled pages of books and the corner of seminar notes. they’ve maybe filled playlists too or been the recipient of her using the caps lock on her phone too much. but she’s never had something that quite literally attacks every part of her. from the way her toes curl in the sand just at the thought of the look dylan gives her, the smile, the idea of what he might say next. the timbre of his voice, a warmth that comes from the short space where her hand curls against his arm.

nothing so overwhelming and so subtle that it simmers until it thrashes full force.

like now when dylan is facing her, and when did he get the time to stand in front of her?

why is he so goddamn tall. why is she reminded now that he’d had nothing under the button-up, why did he have nothing under his button-up? why does everything from the smile to the touch he has on her chin make her weak. any thoughts of removing her gaze from the hold he has on her, die from the words he speaks next.

‘are you sure it’s an ego thing?’

sooyoung’s responses stutter so deep she feels it in her chest. she’s not given time to recover because the smile shifts, brightens from how consuming and dizzying it had been to his regular mirth.

‘maybe it’s just your attention i like.’

she can’t handle this any easier, but she can breathe through it a little better. that’s the most familiar feeling she’s felt since the trip started. so familiar that all sooyoung can do is smile instead of give her usual fluter, and stumble. it’s automatic and she feels his fingers on her chin move as she does so. sooyoung finds her word, trips through them as their gazes remain locked.

“are you saying it’s not an ego thing?” ‘i’m saying - only you get to find out.’

and sooyoung, quite literally goes weak at that.

[dukereviewsxtra]

Duke Reviews Extra: Duke's Top 15 Favorite TV Christmas Episodes

Hi, Everyone, I'm Andrew Leduc And Welcome To Another Duke Reviews Xtra Where Today We Continue Duke's Yultide Reviews...

And As You Know We're Reviewing Christmas Movies And Specials Every Sunday In November And December But There's One Thing That I'm Unable To Review Without Looking At A Series First On Duke Reviews Tv And That's Christmas Episodes And On Today's Top 15 I'm Counting Down My Top 15 Favorites..

With A Few Rules For Myself And My Audience With The First Being One Christmas Episode Per Show Otherwise I'd Be Talking About Every Home Improvement Christmas Episode And Every Glee Christmas Episode Because They're That Good Of Episodes And I Watch Them Every Year During The Holidays But I Might Merit A Mention Or 2 Throughout The Countdown...

Also No Bad Comments Please, This Is My List And It's What I Like, So If You Don't Have Anything Nice To Say, Just Don't Say It At All. Now, On With The Countdown...

15. Mighty Morphin Power Rangers "I'm Dreaming Of A White Ranger"

Go Ahead, I'm Ready...

This Episode Sees The Power Rangers Celebrating Christmas At Ernie's But Lord Zedd And Rita Repulsa Have Evil Plans For The Holidays As They Send Goldar And Rito Revolto To Kidnap Santa And Take Over His Workshop So They Can Have The Elves Mass Produce Lord Zedd's Evil Christmas Toy That Will Enslave The Minds Of All The Children Of The World...

This Episode Has Gotten Alot Of Flack As One Of The Series Worst Episodes But Unlike The Power Rangers Zeo Christmas Episode, I Kind Of Like This One...

It Captures The Right Amount Of Christmas Spirit For Kids While Also Keeping Some Of That Power Ranger Magic Even Without The Suits Which Leads Me To Say See It...

14 Smallville "Lexmas"

This Episode Sees Lex Considering Whether To Have Someone He Knows Get Fake Or Damaging Information On Jonathan Kent In An Attempt To Ruin His Campaign For Senator But When Lex Is Shot By The Navy Thunder Ranger (Seriously It's The Same Actor Who Played That) He Falls Into A Coma And Is Visited By The Ghost Of His Mother Who Shows Lex What His Life Would Be Like If He Frees Himself From His Father. Meanwhile, Clark Helps Chloe Deliver Presents For The Daily Planet..

This Episode Is An Interesting What If Episode...

It's Shows Us What Lex's Life Could Be Even If He Makes The Wrong Choice In The End Either Way I Say See It...

13 The Brady Bunch "The Voice Of Christmas"

In This Classic Episode Of The Brady Bunch, Carol Gets A Case Of Laryngitis, And May Not Be Able To Sing At The Holiday Service This Year But When Cindy Goes To Ask Santa To Give Her Mom Her Voice Back For Christmas...

(Start At 1:47, End At 2:37)

Carol Gets Her Voice Back Via Christmas Miracle And Manages To Sing For The Christmas Service...

(Start At 0:33, End At 2:12)

It Was Hard Placing This So Low But That's Mainly Because There Are So Much Better Christmas Episodes Than This Now...

But It Is A Very Memorable Episode Of The Series And I Can't Help But Remember It When I Look Back At The Brady Bunch And I Definitely Say Give It A Watch...

12. Family Guy "Road To The North Pole"

This Episode Sees The Griffins And All Of Quahog Getting Ready For Christmas, But When A Mall Santa Blows Off Stewie, He Makes It His Mission To Kill Santa Claus. Going To The North Pole With Brian The Dog, They Discover That All The Years Of Lists And Demands From Us Have Practically Killed Santa Claus And If Something Isn't Done, Christmas As We Know It Will Be Gone Forever...

This Episode Has A Great Storyline...

The Songs Are Great And I Can't Help But Sing Along With It Every Year But Despite Some Scenes Being Funny Others Aren't But Either Way It's Still A Fun Christmas Episode And I Say See It...

11. Glee "Extraordinary Merry Christmas"

This Was A Hard Decision To Make As This And The Season 2 Episode "A Very Glee Christmas" Are Both Good Episodes, But This Is Mainly On The List Because Of It's Storyline...

This Episode Sees Sue Recruiting New Directions To Perform For A Bunch Of Homeless People At Homeless Shelter Where She'll Be Volunteering, But When The Glee Club Gets An Opportunity To Create A Holiday Special For PBS With The Paraplegic Artie As Director, The Glee Club Jumps At The Opportunity To Do It To Sue's Dismay...

With Artie Making The Special As A Homage To The Judy Garland Christmas Special And (Sighs) The Star Wars Holiday Special, It Leads To A Special With An Interesting Storyline And Great Songs And I Can't Help But Say See It...

10. Full House "Our First Christmas Show"

I Realize That There Are Some People (Namely The Nostalgia Critic) Who Hate The Tanners But I Can't Help But Love This Episode...

This Episode Sees The Tanner Family Headed To Colorado For The Holidays But When Their Flight Is Forced To Land Until Tomorrow (Which Is Christmas Day) It Has Stephanie Upset That Santa Won't Find Her And It Has DJ Upset When Danny Tells Her That The Presents Are Missing...

But When Jessie Makes A Speech That Unites Everyone Together...

(Start At 1:27, End At 2:39)

They Just May Have The Merriest Christmas Ever...

This Is A Fantastic Christmas Episode With A Great Message That's Definitely Worth A Watch...

09.Friends "The One With The Holiday Armidillo"

While This Is More Of A Hanukkah Episode, It's One Of My Favorites To Watch During The Holidays...

This Episode Sees Ross Wanting To Introduce His Son Ben (Played By Riverdale's Jughead) To Hanukkah But Ben Loves Christmas So Much That It Botches All Of His Attempts But When He Tries One More Time It Leads To A Funny Scene...

This Episode May Be Friends Only Memorable Christmas Episode But It's One Of Their Best And I Can't Help But Say See It...

08. The Flash "Running To Stand Still"

While The Arrowverse Uses Their Christmas Episodes To Introduce The Big Bad Of The Seasons, This One Doesn't And Is Just Focuses Something That Happens Around The Holidays In Central City...

This Episode Sees Weather Wizard Busting Out Captain Cold And The Trickster (Played By Mark Hamill) Out Of Jail So They Can Finish Off The Flash After He Was Nearly Beaten To Death By The Big Bad Of That Season, Zoom. With Captain Cold Passing On The Offer (Only To Go To Legends Of Tomorrow Which Premiered The Following Year) Weather Wizard And The Trickster Team Up To Fight The Flash With The Trickster Going All Out For The Holidays...

This Episode Is Full Of Both Action And Comedy From Both Hamill's Trickster And Miller's Captain Cold, Who Gets Kind Of A Precursor To His Role On Legends In This Episode When He Talks With Barry About Weather Wizard And Trickster And Barry Tells Cold To Help Him Stop Them Only For Cold To Tell Barry That He's Not Interested In Being A Hero When That's What He Ends Up Becoming On Legends Because Barry Inspired Him. Also This Episode Introduces Wally West To The Series Who Would Eventually Become Kid Flash Either Way It's A Great Episode And I Say See It...

07. Doctor Who "The Snowman"

This Episode Sees The 11th Doctor Mourning The Loss Of His 2 Companions, Amy Pond And Rory Williams To Both The Marvel Cinematic Universe And The CW's Arrowverse

But He Is Soon Forced Into Action When A Governess Named Clara Oswin Oswald Investigates Living Snowmen Who Are Being Brought To Life By The Great Intelligence (Voiced By Sir Ian Mckellan) With The Help Of A Man Named Dr. Simeon...

What Can I Say About This Episode? It's The Doctor Vs. An Army Of Snowmen And It's Just Awesome, Plus The Acting In It Is Fantastic, You Can Honestly Feel The Doctor's Pain Over Losing Rory And Amy But When Clara Comes In, It's Like He's A New Man Plus In This Episode We Get A New Interior For The Tardis That Would Soon End Up Belonging To The 12th Doctor As Matt Smith Was Leaving Soon And They Would Find A Replacement In Peter Capaldi, Still It's A Fantastic Episode And I Say See It...

06. Everybody Loves Raymond "The Toaster"

This Was A Hard Decision To Make As Most Of The Everybody Loves Raymond Christmas Episodes Are Pretty Good But I Felt That What Happens In This Episode Happens More Often To Some People...

In This Episode, Ray And Debra Get Personalized Toasters For Their Family And Friends For Christmas, But Despite Ray's Brother, Robert And Debra's Parents Loving The Toasters, Ray's Parents, Frank And Marie, End Up Taking It Back To The Store And Switch It Out For A Coffee Machine...

Realizing That Their Son Is Upset With Them, They Return To The Store To Try To Get It Back...

This Episode Is Funny, What Happens When Ray Finds Out That Marie And Frank Traded In The Toaster For A Coffee Machine Is Freaking Hysterical And That Scene Where Marie Tells Frank That She's Not Just A Trophy Wife Is Also Funny And I Say See It...

05. Batman: The Animated Series "Christmas With The Joker"

This Episode Sees The Joker Escaping From Arkham Asylum To Pirate The TV Airwaves With His Own Christmas Special...

(Start At 1:27, End At 2:06)

Where He Causes Trouble Not Just For Batman And Robin But All Of Gotham As He Kidnaps Commissioner Gordon, Detective Bullock And News Reporter Summer Gleason...

While This Is The First Appearance Of The Best Joker Of All Time, This Episode Is Filled With Action, Christmas Cheer, And Comedy That's Mainly Done By Hamill's Joker And I Definitely Say See It...

04. Two And A Half Men "Walnuts And Demerol"

This Episode Has Charlie About To Have Sex With A Girl Named Gloria But When All Of His Family And Friends Come Over It Goes From A Date Which Is Leading To Coitus To A Funny Christmas Party Despite Charlie Telling Everyone That It's Not A Christmas Party...

Between This And The Episode "Santa's Village Of The Damned" This Was Another Hard Decision...

This Episode Is Funny, With The Stuff Berta Says In This Episode, Candy Playing The Piano And The Surprise Twist In The Episode (Yes, There's A Surprise Twist) It's A Good Episode And I Say See It...

03. Frasier "Frasier Grinch"

This Episode Sees Frasier Crane Preparing To Spend The Holidays With His Father And His Son Fredrick, But When He Wrong Box Of Toys Him And Niles Have To Get Fredrick The Presents He Ordered On Christmas Eve At A Toy Store...

This Episode Is Very Funny I Absolutely Love The Scenes Where Fraiser Is Trying To Tell His Annual Christmas Story To His Viewers Only To Be Interrupted By "Bulldog" Briscoe And Gil Chesterton Who Bring In A Stripper To Distract Frasier From Telling His Boring Story And When Frasier Comes Home To His Penthouse Apartment To See That His Father Has Turned His Apartment Into Santa's Winter Wonderland For Fredrick, Either Way, It's A Good Episode And I Say See It...

02. Home Improvement "Twas The Night Before Chaos"

Again With Alot Of Good Home Improvement Christmas Episodes This Was A Hard Decision To Make...

The Taylor Family Spend Christmas With Tim's Brother, Marty, His Wife And Their Newborn Babies But When Jill's Parents Also Come Over For The Holidays, Jill Notices That They're Defiantly Not Getting Along As Ever Since Her Father, The Colonel (Played By The Same Guy Who Was Tim's Older Neighbor In Christmas With The Kranks) Retired From The Army, He Hasn't Done Anything Except Watch Patton In His Den Over And Over Again

And Jill's Mom Thought That Once He Retired That They Would See The World...

If Roseanne Was Good At Halloween, Then Home Improvement Did Christmas Just As Good, From Tim's Lighting Contest Fights With Their Proctologist Neighbor, Doc Johnson To Tool Time Around The Holidays These Episodes Are Funny And This One Is No Exception And I Definitely Say See It...

Before We Get To Our Number One Let's Look At The Top 5 Runners Up That We Wanted To Add But Just Couldn't...

05. X-Men "Have Yourself A Morlock Little X-Mas

The X-Men Celebrate Christmas Together However When The Morlocks Ask The X-Men To Save Their Youngest Member, Wolverine Has To Make A Decision Whether To Use His Blood To Save Him Or Not...

04. Mystery Science Theatre 3000 "The Christmas That Almost Wasn't"

Between This And The Santa Claus Conquers The Martians Episode, This Was A Hard Decision To Make...

The Team Aboard The Satellite Of Love Is Forced By KInga Forrester And Her Partner Max, Tv's Son Of Tv's Frank To Watch A Movie Called The Christmas That Almost Wasn't Which Sees Santa Claus Asking A Lawyer To Help Him Deal With A Miserly Land Owner Named Prune, Who Will Own Santa's Home Unless He Pays Him Back His Entire Debt He Owes By Christmas Eve Or Gives Him All Of The Christmas Presents As Collateral Which Would Destroy Christmas As We Know It...

03. The Monkees "Our Christmas Show"

The Monkees Look After A Rich Kid (Played By Eddie Munster) Who Believes Christmas Is A Waste Of Time So, The Group Tries To Get The Kid Into The Christmas Spirit...

02. The Real Ghostbusters "X-Mas Marks The Spot"

The Ghostbusters Accidentally Go Into A Time Portal To Victorian England And Accidentally Capture The Ghosts Of Past, Present And Future Which In Turn Creates A Grim Future Where Christmas No Longer Exists And Everyone Acts Like Ebenezer Scrooge And The Only Way To Fix This Is To Get The Ghosts Out Of The Containment Grid And Place Them Back Where They Were With Scrooge...

01. Kim Possible "A Very Possible Christmas"

As Kim Spends Christmas With Her Family And Her Grandma, Ron And Rufus Take An Assignment To Deal With Dr. Drakken's Latest Attempt To Take Over The World As A Secret Santa Gift For Kim, But When The Mission Goes Wrong With Ron, Rufus And Drakken Stranded At The North Pole, It's Up To Kim And Her Family To Rescue Them Before Shego Gets There...

And Now Onto Our Number One Favorite Christmas TV Episode...

01. The Big Bang Theory "The Bath Item Gift Hypothesis"

This Episode Sees Penny Getting Sheldon A Christmas Present Which Forces Him To Get A Christmas Gift For Penny With The Help Of Raj And Howard, Stopping By Bed Bath And Beyond, Sheldon Decides To Get Penny A Gift Basket Of Bath Items But Not Knowing What Size, Sheldon Decides To Buy A Boatload Of Them And Give Penny The Correct Basket Depending On The Size Of The Gift, So, When Christmas Morning Comes Around This Happens...

#1 (Start At 0:41, End At 1:54) #2 (Start At 2:38, End At 3:19)

This Episode Is The Most Hilarious Christmas Episode I Have Ever Seen And That Is Because Of Jim Parsons' Sheldon Cooper And How He Handles Christmas Or Saturnalia....

(Start At 0:08, End At 0:40)

And Because Of That, I Say See It...

Till Next Time, This Is Duke, Signing Off...

[thebigg-v3]

AI – Thoughts and Rants

This summer semester I decided to take Introduction to Artificial Intelligence, which the university I go to offers as an elective for CS majors. Which is awesome, I know! As a computer science student I had been curious for a while about the robots, talking computers that assist Iron Man, and even the “magic” behind things like Siri. Yes even I, someone who is in the “know” about a field like software engineering, which is intertwined with AI in more ways than one, fantasizes (or used to, maybe?) about a future where robots assist us on all kinds of tasks and make our lives better/easier, or in the case of I, Robot, a lot worse. All jokes and fiction aside, the fact is that AI exists already in our lives. In fact it is so infused with our day-to-day lives that we don’t even notice it. You ever look at the weather app on your phone? Do you ever go to Google Translate? Do you ever ask Google for directions? Do you ever ask Siri anything? All of these things use some technique that was born in the field of AI, or machine learning (which is a very close sibling to AI). I could go into all  kinds of impressive, and not-so-impressive, techniques that I learned about in the class. A-Star search; Informed Search; Probabilistic Reasoning; Markovian Models; Neural Nets, etc. But this is not the reason why I write this.

The reason why I write this essay/blog post is because a friend of mine, who is planning on taking the class next semester, asked me a very simple question, “How is AI?”. Well...the truth is that is not a simple question at all. It’s a tough question. Because I do have MANY reservations about AI. They range from the philosophical, technical and even reach out to my ethical concerns about Artificial Intelligence. Now, before I go on, I want to be clear about something: THIS IS A BIASED PIECE. As I go on, you’ll notice I have specific opinions about AI as a software engineer. I also want to state that this is NOT a piece meant to attack/offend anybody/anyone/ any organization that is researching AI or building products powered by AI/machine learning. I think you are all awesome people(a little crazy, but in a good way), and you have my utmost and sincere respect. Now that that is out of the way, let’s get down to business.

Before coming to this class I thought AI was an awesome/fascinating field(at the moment I still do). That with everyone—mainstream media, programmers, Google, Microsoft—hyping up AI, I thought to myself, there has to be reason for all the buzz and fuzz about this “AI thing” . And to be honest, MOST of it is undeniably granted. So...as a software engineer I was surprised by how mathematical AI really was. You’d think that a field that is, as stated before, so infused with our lives would be somewhere on the vicinity of software engineering in regards to practicality. But it’s truly not. The truth is that a lot of problems, rightfully so, have to be theorized/generalized in some way before they’re solved in an intelligent manner by a machine. And this makes sense. Think about it, if you want to talk about path-finding, “paths” aren’t simply cities A-F, and find the shortest path. This could be the surface of a new planet with a different landscape, New York, a colony in the moon or you might even have a case where you’re concerned about the cost of moving a piece on a chessboard. It’s also not just about making the algorithm fast. And it’s not that AI doesn’t welcome nice Big O notations like constant time and linear and logN—and these are becoming less central to any algorithm given all of the crazy-fast hardware we have today and the crazier-faster that is still to come. These are, like any algorithm, preferred over N^2 or something above that. However, AI’s top priority to my understanding(at least if I learned what I was supposed to learn), is to solve problems, or find answers, in an intelligent way.

But what the in the world does intelligent mean, anyway?

This is when AI becomes philosophical. And, if you ever take this class(or at least the specific AI class I took), you won’t be tested on the philosophical definitions of AI. But even though you won’t be tested on those when doing the projects, which is the most important part of the class, you won’t directly use anything philosophical, it’s worth keeping in mind that any algorithm in AI is trying to do things intelligently. This means that brute force is not welcome; that randomness, with some exceptions(like hill climbing), is not very welcome; most things that aren’t generalized(in an intelligent manner) are not very welcome. This is one of the reasons why AI is math-heavy: AI scientists need a way to generalize intelligence. But how general can intelligence really be? Can it really mimic the intelligence of a human to the point that it can compose songs, write an essay on the politics of the world and even make moral judgments? At the end of the day, not really. I mean you can take all of the songs recorded up to this day, and write a fancy neural net(don’t ask me how they work, they’re not super-complicated, but not a walk-in-the-park either) and it can classify and recognize some patterns and put something together….but it’s just re-mixing what we’ve already heard and listened to a million times. So no, AI is not that general. The AI of today is very narrow. This is not to say that it is useless. AI is very useful and will be in the future; speech recognition will get better; self-driving cars will improve; it will be able to write “better” songs. But AI won’t have a face; it won’t (and this is subjectively my opinion) have the ability to make moral judgments(and if we allow it to, then we are fools buying snake oil). As a software engineer I found the radical uses of Bayes Theorem somewhat interesting, but not very exciting. I found myself subscribing to the idea to program intelligence into the machine, rather than program it and tell it what to do. This, if I’m being frank, made me a little uncomfortable. As a software engineer I like tinkering with machines, I like to write programs that solve problems(rather than “program” intelligence and let It solve the problems for me). I felt as if I were being submissive to this idea—I know, it’s a stretch. And yes, I am probably romanticizing programming as a craft, but I’m sorry, I can’t help it. Speaking of programming machines, that reminds me, to the AI people(and I’m speaking about the specific people that guided me throughout the class—professors and TAs) the code did not matter. Which struck me as surprising, and a little unnerving. To them all that mattered was the theorems, excel charts and “report”. Which again, given the fact that the code itself in practice is the building block for the AI agent to do whatever it is that it needs to do, was unnerving—borderline frustrating. I don’t write code to plot charts, theorize formulas or see trends. That’s not to say, I write code without documentation. Documentation is not what we are talking about here. Indeed, self-documented code is a must. But to write code to satisfy Bayes Theorem? That itself is frustrating and, in my opinion, goes against the spirit of creativity in programming. It goes against the lemma I follow when I code—hack away. Hack the malloc calls to the point where all of the segments you allocate are continuous; trick the OS into caching at all levels only your processes; manipulate CPU priorities to make your process priority 1 because the game you’re building is over-bloated with physics calculations and unnecessary art, and that computer does not have a GPU. AI felt nothing like hacking computers. AI felt nothing like engineering solutions. It felt like forcing code to comply with some theorem—Bayes Theorem,  making informed decisions, Perceptron, etc. I seriously respect these techniques, because all of them are incredibly cool and quite impressive. And heck, software engineers do use these techniques today. But, in my humble opinion, an engineer doesn’t have to fully comply with a mathematical rule. They are nice because they make a bunch of assumptions that MOST of the time are true. But in engineering, when we have to directly sometimes interact with hardware and users, some of these assumptions are not very useful in practice. Sometimes as engineers, if we were building an OS, one might have to hard-code stuff with macros in C to make a specific architecture/piece of hardware faster. Sometimes in software engineering, one doesn’t have the luxury of just “throwing memory” at a problem—which is part of the idea of machine learning, along with some statistics. Throw memory at it, implement perceptron and you can classify pictures! Engineers have to keep in mind the cost of adding two gigs of ram—cost in terms of money and resources. As an engineer, when handling CPU scheduling, sometimes one doesn’t know what the best scheduling scheme is. Sometimes engineers have to wait till users actually use the software, and get a “feel” for what’s the best CPU scheduling scheme, given the different use cases. AI doesn’t like hard-coded macros, that’s not intelligent. AI doesn’t love edge-cases hacks, that’s not intelligent. AI doesn’t care about beautiful code that might be 10% faster because one follows good practices. AI, from the impression I got in this class, is almost programming-independent. One might even say it finds programming languages hindering because there isn’t a language that fully expresses how “great”(ahem, intelligent) It really is. I could be wrong about these assumptions. Because, heck, what do I know? I’m only a software engineer.

Despite my reservations about AI, I highly recommend taking the class as a CS major. Having said what I said, AI is not going away. For better or worse, it will stay in the lives of people, software engineers and not-software engineers. It is and will be a necessary evil of our present and future. Take the class, get a feel for what you think of it. And if you’re like me—you like to hack computers—you’ll survive in that jungle of probability and intelligence greatness. I honestly can’t tell you to stay or not, that’s your choice. In the meantime, I choose not to.

[cosmosogler]

hello everyone.

today i did actually make my lunch and get to campus around 11:40 or so. i worked for a while until rebika showed up, which is when i took a small lunch break, and then we worked together for about two hours. i finished two practice problems- one full problem, most of another, and 1/4 of a third. ammar came to help, and adamya made a guest appearance, and mainak also helped a bit. so we had a whole adventure. we didn’t solve the problem we were having, which is why one problem got left at “mostly finished.” 

i came home around 3:30 and got to work drawing. i talked with oz for a while, which was nice and kept me focused on my project, since i can’t read and talk on the phone at the same time.

i had an alright dinner, and i did my dishes and some chores, and i started listening to welcome to night vale. i really liked it so i listened through four episodes while i worked. hearing “the bus is late” as a “weather report” probably made me the most delighted i’ve felt in days. i was so surprised by this wonderful song.

comic wise i finished over an entire page of drawing. i’ve got four panels left in scene 3, and then scene 4 is also three pages. i look at the endless expanse of panels to finish before i can post these tiny story tidbits and i weep.

i ended up changing a lot of things from my boards but i think the final drafts of these next two scenes work a lot better as, like... showing the reader that we and nas don’t really know the main character anymore. her friend’s been replaced by a terrifying volatile asshole. 

it’s good.

anyway doing practice problems made me feel a little better again, even though i noticed i was STILL having too much trouble getting started on problems without a set of directions in front of me. when i almost fell asleep while i was actively in the process of writing equations in my ipad i called it a day. too stressed i guess. or something. maybe i need more sleep. i probably need more sleep in addition to my many other problems. snoopy isn’t helping.

i feel like whenever i bring up my feelings all i can think or talk about is how lonely i feel. makes me feel pathetic. this should be an easy problem to solve. i hate going through the process of making friends though, deciding when and when not to be “vulnerable,” getting furious with myself every time i feel like i overshared, beating myself up when i let a conversation die because i didn’t share... i’m 25! i’m almost 26!! i should be better at this by now!!!

i hate making friends and then getting ditched, or worse. it could be so much worse than getting ditched... it makes it hard to invest. it makes it hard to be interested in other people when i spend the whole conversation sweating over whether or not to tell this or that story, or share how bad i’m feeling. 

but the longer i go without talking to people the less interested i feel in it (even though the desire to be heard never goes away at all), and the less... “able” i feel to do it. reality gets all tangled up and things kinda happen around me and it feels like a dream. but i know i gotta get up and react to the world, because i know in my head it’s probably not a dream. and even if it is, when i get hurt in my dreams, it hurts! so either way i gotta pay attention, and i have no energy to pay attention.

i feel so powerless. when i would hang out with my classmates i felt so unseen. people would talk over me even after i had started a sentence. i look at these other people and i don’t know what to do. i don’t know how to make myself likable to them and turn myself into a friend. i look at the physics problems and i don’t know how to make myself remember how to do physics. like if i don’t have the answer in front of me, the instructions, i just kind of look at it helplessly. even though when i look at the answer my brain immediately puts together how everything works and i am able to explain it to my classmates (their own math, by the way, i was following- they needed me to explain their answer to them). i feel so dopey. i have all these different things and ideas and i can’t put any of them together to make an answer. socially, academically, financially... 

at least with making phone calls and stuff i can write down a general set of directions and then follow them. you know, “introduce yourself, give some context, say what the problem is, wait for their questions.” i have clear small steps i can follow. 

but i have so much trouble breaking other things down. even doing the dishes i kind of gawk down at the sink for a few minutes. even if there’s, like, only a plate and a fork in there it feels like Doing Dishes, Which Takes Ten Minutes. 

i noticed last semester in therapy, with that counselor who made me feel bad, i couldn’t break myself down either. that’s what she was trying to do. break me into different pieces to see how they each worked in a more manageable way. but i couldn’t really get behind that idea. the part of me that feels sad all the time is the same part of me that likes doing physics. it’s One Unit, Which Has A Lot Of Feelings. untangling those feelings turns into a huge ordeal because i can’t break myself down into clear small bits that are easy to figure out individually.

i do that with words and ideas too. i have trouble distinguishing between things sometimes, or seeing what the point of separating them is. i could not articulate that concept (or lack of a concept, i guess) to harrison a few weeks ago and we argued about it for hours because i couldn’t make him understand how i saw it. i feel like no one understands how i see it because even i can’t understand how i see it. i can’t even figure out how to describe an example here. we were arguing about platonic ideals and perfection and i said the idea of perfection was complete nonsense to me. things aren’t “perfect” or “imperfect.” they just “are” how they “are.” 

i can see why the idea of a platonic ideal, the “perfect chair” or whatever, is useful for common language, but at the same time... that way of looking at the world lends itself well to seeing imperfections everywhere and judging those imperfections as inferior to that imaginary ideal. 

like christianity and sin. “nobody’s perfect.” you just are what you are. you change, and grow, and shrink in other ways, and you’re always changing in little ways even as you remain yourself, but that’s not imperfect or perfect. it’s just existing. 

and yet... i argue semantics endlessly and i never get bored of making stupid distinctions between words, choosing every one carefully, even when i’m just rambling for hours like this. picking apart other people’s words. why do i even care? do i know what they meant? do they know what they meant? why is the distinction there so important to me when i don’t even like the tools we use to make language into coherent communication? 

see i got all turned around. i wanted to talk about why i’m having so much trouble solving physics problems and it turned into an overwhelming philosophical question. navel gazing. i can’t tell if it’s a bad habit or not. probably a mixed bag. it’s not helping me right now.

i feel like... there’s something wrong in my life. something wrong in the way i am able to interact with my life. that disconnect is making all these different aspects of my life break and become much harder than they need to be. much harder than they are for “normal” people. 

i could blame my upbringing. i could blame my parents. i’d probably be right, too. but at some point i gotta get up and move on and take care of myself and start having all those skills that normal people my age have. like basic problem solving. “learning how to think critically.” and i feel like i’m not doing that. but i have no idea how to even start. 

worse yet, i get the feeling i probably do have those skills and there’s something else i’m not getting, but i can’t see the ACTUAL problem because my confidence is all shot to hell.

i can’t tell what’s really happening. i can’t tell what’s real. i wish someone else could tell me or teach me how to tell for myself. i have no idea how i look to other people, and i have no idea how to describe my personality or my being most of the time. i have no idea how to describe my life other than “i am very unhappy now, and i have been unhappy for a very long time,” and i know that comes off as pathetic and most people will just call me a pessimist. 

but i am, truly, very unhappy. and i have been for a very long time.

[akanemachurida-blog]

18/01/05 - Laguna Music Festival Report

I went to the SKE48 Laguna Music Festival on January 5. There has been and will be more streams of this event but I figured I might as well do a report since I’ve been inactive for so long.

This was my first proper SKE concert, so I was really excited to go. Unfortunately, Churi couldn’t be there due to her play, which began the following day. This concert was really long, but as usual I’ll start with the boring stuff like how I got there.

The Laguna park is in Gamagoori which is very close to where I live, so it didn’t take me long to get there. There was a free shuttle bus from the station to the park, and while they were only scheduled every thirty minutes there were a ton of people today so there were extra buses. I waited a while but nothing to complain about.

I then entered the park. I actually had to buy data on my phone (the first time I’ve ever had data on a phone) since the tickets were electronic and I had to show a webpage and have a staff click some button. I wish they let us print tickets out but I guess everyone owns a phone with data now.

I wanted to explore the park a bit but as usual I got anxious about how the ticket situation was going to work. After I paid online for my ticket I was given #C179. I think everyone was in the C block apart from those with handicaps. So I guessed that my ticket was good, but I didn’t realize how good it was, since the numbers actually started from 100, meaning I was the 79th in. Actually, the staff didn’t really properly check out tickets when we were going in, meaning some people could have cut in with a bad number and gotten a good view. Regardless, I waited around thirty minutes to get inside the “venue”, where I had to wait another hour for the show to begin.

(This was where we lined up with our numbers. We were calleld up and made our way to the stage on the other side of the bridge.)

It was very cold that day, so I made sure to dress warmly. I’m glad I wore a lot of layers because it quickly got colder when the sun set. A lot of others did not dress for the occasion and I could see that they were in pain after the concert. Counting the waiting and concert I stood for around five hours, which really sucks if you aren’t prepared for the weather.

Alright, now for the concert itself. I felt like an idiot during the entire concert since I forgot to bring my penlight that changes colours and only brought my green one. Have you ever watched a video and thought “Wow that person is so inconsiderate, always keeping the same colour? Why can’t they change and support the other members too?” well that was me that day. I was so focused on supporting Maya that I forgot to bring the other penlight.

M01 1!2!3!4! Yoroshiku

One of my favourite SKE “classics.” All the members participated in the first three songs, so it took me a while to find Maya. I actually spent half or more of this song trying to find her. I finally did near the end of it.

M02 Banzai Venus

Now that I found Maya I was on homing-mode for the rest of the concert. My target was locked and nothing was going to stop me from following her through the songs. I actually don’t care much for this song but I was pretty much fixated on Maya so I don’t have much to add here.

M03 Te wo Tsunaginagara

A classic. I think it was my first time hearing it live. This is one of those songs that pays to look at someone throughout it. Maya was just hilarious, although I can’t remember who she was with for this song. Again, I was on my Maya cam so no comments on the other members. This song just flew by since I was enjoying myself so much.

Maya wrote in her blog that she was given this senbatsu outfit for the start. She first wore that outfit at Sae’s grad concert but had to give it up after she was dropped from senbatsu shortly after. She was happy to be able to wear it again and hopes to get more costumes of her own as time goes by.

MC

Since there are so many members there weren’t any introductions. Only ten or so members stayed for the MC, where they eventually wished Tani a happy birthday. Makiko and Wanchan came in for a surprise wearing yukata, but they hadn’t congratulated Tani yet so they had to go back. Makiko and Wanchan were given yukata since they were the two members born in the year of the dog. (Ranran is another one, but she wasn’t there today)

M04 Koko de Ippatsu - Makiko, Wanchan

I did not like this performance. I think this is the first time I’ve been disappointed when I’ve seen SKE perform a song. I’ve usually blamed the song over the members in the past, and maybe my expectations were too high. However I’ve come to really like this song after Churi performed it with Mizuno Airi at Zepp Tokyo last year, and I’ve watched that performance countless times. This performance did not match it at all, which was disappointing. That being said, they were wearing yukata which likely made it hard to move, but they hardly moved at all anyway.

Anyway, during the song the two members announced their goals for the year. Wanchan’s is to lose 10 kilos to do gravure and Makiko’s is to not fail a single time!

M05 Koppu no Naka no Komorebi / Love Crescendo（original members）

I’ve never been much of a fan of this song, and I always paid attention to the Transit Girls unit of the single since I liked a lot of members in it. However with my rising appreciation of Maya I was very excited to see this song. I made sure to call out Maya’s name when it was her turn, although I accidentally called her name at other times too. I made sure to call everyone else too during this song, I was very into it. It’s funny how a single member can make you like a song.

M06 Madogiwa Lover / Next Position

This song is pretty unremarkable and I actually totally forgot it. I was probably still thinking about the past song and was in bliss. Sorry.

M07 Kanpeki Gu~ no ne / STRAWBERRY PUNCH

This is some old AKB song and this was the first time I heard it. Yuzuki and Mikotti did a very good job though, everyone was pumped for this song and in a good mood. I didn’t see them during the Unit Contest but they did really well and I enjoyed seeing them as a unit.

M08 Wimbledon he Tsureteitte / Yukatan, Sakipon, Honono

Never really liked this song, but I surprisingly liked it. It’s different live, since you get to do a lot of calls and get into the song. I also was really impressed with Sakipon’s dancing and movements during this song. She’s one of my favourite performers and she didn’t disappoint during this concert. I also like her a lot in that outfit and she did a good job at keeping my attention.

M09 Ookami to Pride / Mizuno Airi, Kamimura Ayuka

Like the last song, I don’t really like this song all that much, but the pairing was just great. It was really cool to see them perform together! It really exuded freshness. I’m not sure whether their performance was shaky or not since I haven’t watched this song much.

M10 Finland Miracle / Ouchan, Machi, Ayamelody

Another song with a fresh feeling. I was really getting into the groove of the concert and enjoying myself, and it made me happy to see this unit. This was the first time I saw this song live. It’s a very nostalgic one since it’s a Ramune song and I thoroughly enjoyed it for that nostalgia factor as well as the bonus of seeing these younger members perform it.

MC2 / Next Position, Yuzuki, Sakipon, Narupi, Airi, Ayuka

I totally forgot what this MC was about, I’m sorry. But Next Position’s goal for 2018 was to stay together and not die a natural death!

M11 Kamoku na Tsuki / Nao, Mikotti

This is without a doubt my favourite 48g song, and I was just overjoyed to see it today. I was surprised that only two members performed it, and I really would have liked to see more members in it. I remember Churi performing it during a Request Hour years and years ago, so I want her to perform it again. Unfortunately she wasn’t there and Maya wasn’t in this song either. However for all this complaining about extra members, the two present were absolutely fantastic. Nao is probably the best performer in the group, and Mikotti really surprised me during this song. Both of their voices sounded absolutely fantastic and it blew me away. This concert certainly made me appreciate Mikotti more.

M12 Himawari / Yukina, Rara, Sarina, Piyosu

Not a fan of this song and I did not like this performance either. The sound was really awful and I had a hard time picking the vocals out from the instruments. I don’t want to be more negative so I’ll leave it at that. I saw people saying good things about it when they saw the stream so maybe I am in the wrong here.

M13 Manazashi Sayonara / Kano, Tani

A song that I like, but I think I’ve seen this song a bit too much, making it stale. I didn’t really “feel” anything from this specific performance, unlike previous performances of the song. It made me think of how great Nao and Airin were when they performed it. That being said it wasn’t a bad performance.

M14 Kono Mune no Barcode / Kumachan, Minarun, Nacchi

It had been a really long time since I had heard this song. I don’t really care for it much but I thought the members did a good job.

MC3 / Oshirin, Kano, MAchi, Honono, Kocchan, Wanchan, Yukatan, Piyosu, Hatagon

They talked about what they did on New Year’s, but I completely forgot what they said. Sorry.

M15 Omoide Ijou  / Yokonyan, Juna, Narupi

Now this was special. I notice myself thinking that every time I see Yokonyan center a song, so I think there is a trend here. She is just a fantastic performer and makes every song she is in electrifying. You can feel her excitement and it easily makes its way into the crowd. Narupi had a bit of a stumble during the beginning of the song so I felt bad for her, but she recovered quickly and performed well for the rest of it. I didn’t really look at Juna much since Yokonyan drew me in and I was watching Narupi quite a bit. It was refreshing seeing this song with these members and I hope to see Yokonyan center more songs in the future. The nice thing about her long hair is that you can still see her hair flying around the stage even if you can’t see her body due to someone’s head being in the way.

M16 Ame no Pianist / Yumana, Reona, Satokaho

I thought Yumana looked great during this song. Again, another fun mix of members. However for whatever reason I didn’t feel much energy from the members during this song. Maybe it’s just the nature of the song, but I was looking for a little something more during this song.

M17 Cross / Oshirin, Hatagon, Aiai

This is where I turn into a total hypocrite. Notice how I’ve been saying how I appreciate the variety of the members in these units. This song is where I turned into a reactionary and wanted the traditional order back. I guess not having Churi in this concert and hearing her song made want to see her perform it, leaving me disappointed. The nice thing about the units is that they mix members from teams, however I was just left hoping this song only had KII members. I’m probably wrong to feel that way but it’s how I felt during the performance so I’m writing it here. I was also disappointed with myself for not bringing my other penlight since I really wish I could have turned to red for this song.

M18 Hanshateki Suru / Love Crescendo (with new members)

All those negative feelings vanished when I saw Maya on the stage again. Apart from Kamoku na Tsuki, which was a pleasant surprise, this would be the song I was looking forward to the most. I really like the short version they uploaded on the official youtube, so I was excited to hear the full version and see Maya perform it. She was great and so were the other members I caught glimpses of. In a way this felt like the climax of the concert since I got to see the song and member I wanted to hear/see the most.

MC4 / Love Crescendo

And they stayed for the MC! I was in for a treat since Maya introduced the new Love Crescendo members. She said that Renahyuu needs to decide a character quickly because Maya isn’t sure what kind of character she has in real life, but she recommends people to go talk to Renahyuu if they share her interests since she’s great at talking about her hobbies. She then said that (Inoue) Ruka is a country bumpkin, since apparently Kumamoto is more country-like than Miyagi, and she hopes that Ruka can fish fans with her cute dialect since she’s one of the few to use her dialect.

She then said that Miyomaru is just skin and bones, but that under those thin bones lies a strong will to be an idol. And finally Chikako has a smile as big as the area of the Laguna park! No one can not be happy after they see Chikako’s smile. She wants Chikako to continue smiling. Maya wrote on her blog that her manager praised her for this MC. Maya then said she and Renahyuu had to leave to prepare for the next song, so I was really happy to hear that and just thrilled to hear she’d be in another song! The rest of the MC was about what they wanted to do, but I tuned out and just day dreamed about Maya.

M19 Matsumurarabu! / Kaotan

I hope the camera didn’t capture the disappointment on my face. I was shocked. This was the song Maya was going to appear in? I quickly realized that she meant a following song and that I was dumb to expect her to appear in the next song. Anyway, I found myself getting into the song. I think I’ve heard this song so much with KII that I just instinctively clap and cheer along. Kaotan threw signed balls and then got a bat (which she didn’t do well with) and a tennis racket (which she did extremely well with) to throw balls at the crowd during the song. So I ended up liking the song despite my initial confusion.

M20 Darenimo Iwanaide / Kocchan（Panda dancers: second draftees）

This was the first time I heard Kocchan’s solo song she got from the rock paper scissors tournament. I actually don’t have an opinion of it yet, I need to listen to it again, and I didn’t pay that much attention to Kocchan. Maya came in with Kocchan’s own Panchan and was a back dancer, along with the other second draft members. I was just overcome with the cuteness of the song and stared at Maya. Even though this was a solo song it ended up having other members too, which I liked. However, I wonder if that’s fair considering the performances before and after only had a single member too. I don’t think the other members detracted from Kocchan’s performance, even if I was mostly staring at someone who was not Kocchan lol. I felt that it added to the song and spectacle and her panda character.

M21 Ima no Watashija Damenanda / Akarin

I was starting to get a bit tired of the solo songs, since this was the third in a row. Still, I think that was okay since I hadn’t seen Dasu for much of the concert. Actually, this was the first time she appeared since the first three songs, so I think she deserved it. There were a ton of her fans around me, and they really enjoyed this song. This created a nice atmosphere and I found myself enjoying the performance too, even if I didn’t really like the song.

M22 Hanauranai / Jurina

I simply did not like this at all. A fourth solo song in a row which featured a member who appeared plenty already. I realize that Jurina is popular but she surely could have gone into a unit with other members. Now I don’t want to blame her for this since it might not have been her decision but I was not particularly happy. The song was also quite bad. I think I would have come around to like it if she performed Akai Pinheel, either by herself or with another member. At least that song gets me excited. It also felt like this song would just not end.

M23 Igai ni Mango / Yunana center

Time for a great song to bring me back to life. The next units all had various members thrown into them. This particular bunch of girls had Maya in it so I was overjoyed to see her perform this song with Yunana. Maya was very close to me, so I got to look at her a lot during this song, and it was awesome. She made a lot of funny faces too, which made me laugh a lot.

M24 12gatsu no Kangaroo / Yokonyan and Ego double center

Maya’s unit left but I was really happy to see Yokonyan center another song. This song never fails to get me excited. It’s also one that gets me moving a bit, which was nice since my legs were very stiff and sore.

M25 Maenomeri / Rara, Chikako, Miyomaru front three

The third unit arrived and this song was equally excellent. I spent my time during these songs looking at all the members since there were so many. I also think this was my first time hearing this song live, which was really cool.

M26 Coquettish Juutaichuu / Nao, Sarina double center

Another excellent song. This part of the concert was great. It was a lot of fun saying the “ku-ki-zu-ke” part of the song.

M27 Sansei Kawaii! / (Inoue) Ruka, Kano, Yukatan, Miyomaru front

I honestly forgot how many times they changed between units. Miyomaru was there two songs ago and here she is again. Yet I can’t remember seeing Maya a second time. These units and members were a blur! It happened so quickly.

MC5 / Mikotti, Reona, Ouchan, Satokaho, Yokonyan, Nacchi, Ayamelody, Yumana

The topic was what they wanted to do to celebrate the tenth anniversary of the group. I can’t remember anything except for Ayamelo saying she wanted to do a SKE48 only sports meet where the fans could join in. I’d love to join that if it were to happen!

M28 Muishiki no Iro / （Makiko took Churi’s spot）

The new single that everyone wanted to hear. Of course I was only looking at Maya, but she’s on the edge at the back, on the left. I had a very hard time seeing from my angle. Jurina’s waist was in front of where Maya was, so I was trying to maneuver around it to get a glimpse. I remember just giving up and looking at Minarun instead and trying again later.

M29 Boku wa Shitteiru / ALL

I honestly forgot most of what happened here. I was just trying to get a look at Maya and got to call her name a few times. I noticed that I was usually the only one calling her name (from the voices I could hear) when it was her turn on songs. It kind of made me question if I was breaking a rule or something since people would be rather quiet when it was time to call her and other members around her.

(I feel bad for writing this but my point of these reports is to describe how I felt during the concert so I feel that it’s necessary)

Jurina wrote a blog after the concert saying she cried during this song because it hit her that she was the only first gen left when she was the only one singing a part of the song, making her feel lonely when she thought about it being the tenth anniversary. Anyway, afterwards Makiko asked Jurina what was wrong since Jurina was crying. To be honest I was pretty angry at this point since I felt that Jurina had taken up enough of the spotlight as it was and might have been acting dramatic to get some attention. I didn’t use to think of Jurina in this way but after the Unit Contest where she cried after losing to Strawberry Punch and caused a big scene which made Yuzuki upset I have started to wonder if she purposefully craves attention during these concerts since it seems to happen every time and the entire group needs to coddle her.

MC6

The members made us count down the illumination of the park. The colours were really nice and lit up the night sky nicely!

M30 Nakama no Uta / ALL

A nice song to end it off, felt very traditional. It was nice to sing the last part but I had to improvise and try to remember the lyrics since I don’t know them well at all lol.

The members bowed afterwards and said their thank you, but they only bowed twice instead of three times. Afterwards the members started waving at us in the crowd. Maya was right in front of me and I was furiously shaking that lightstick trying to get her attention. (Heat of the moment) Unfortunately for me, Makiko made all the members come back and do a re-take of the bow and thank you. Jurina fell down (for comedic effect?) during the re-take. I couldn’t help but think of what I thought of before, but whatever, it was Maya time again. 

The person in front of me was rather tall but wasn’t much a problem for much of the concert. However, he was a Kumachan oshi and he had one of those fans with her face on it. Maya and Kuma were often together near the end and whenever Kuma was near us he would jump and wave that fan, obscuring me from Maya’s gaze. Anyway I made sure to stay clear of that thing as best of I could to make contact with Maya. Incidentally, the person behind me was a bit of a bother too, hitting my back a few times with his penlight and his bag.

I was hoping Maya would stay around our area of the stage, and she did for a bit. She waved at me and smiled a lot and I felt great to put it lightly. I just kept waving throughout. She would then wave at any other person she could spot with a solo geen penlight. She would make this circle motion for people who were far away, and then point at them to make sure they knew she was waving at them.

There were some Saanan calls after it was over, and she came out by herself and talked about how it was sad since it was her last concert with SKE. I actually can’t remember what else she said but it was along those lines. It was emotional yet she didn’t overdo it.

This was a pretty special event since I decided to focus entirely on one member during the times she was there, as opposed to other events where I tried to pay attention to everyone. It was a lot of fun. I think Maya is special in this case because she is always making a funny face and laughing with other members. I’m impressed by her serious side the most though. As much as she likes joking around she puts a lot of effort in trying to locate her fans. I noticed that during the first three songs her eyes would briefly scan the audience. It’s very subtle and happens extremely quickly, but it seems like she utilizes some parts of the dance to get a view of the fans. For example, I noticed that she looked directly at me several times at the start, and would make these brief gazes at other areas of the audience. This may sound unnatural but it actually looked very fluid. I assume this is how she kept track of me during the time I went to the Team E theatre performance.

After the concert I took pictures of the illuminations and met up with some fans from Taiwan and China. I didn’t speak to all of them but there was a group of six or so fans who made the trip for the live. Two of them are Churi oshis so I told them about how great Maya is and showed them some pictures to try and convert them.

I hope I can go to another concert or theatre performance before I have to leave!

[cecilspeaks]

113 - Niecelet

Gooooooood eevening, fine citizens. I’m your late night host this week, here to keep you company after sundownn.

Welcome to Night Vale!

As you regular listeners already know, I took over the night shifts this week, because I’ve been spending my days with a very special house guest. Well, more like one and a half house guests. My favorite cousin Sabina is visiting, and she’s 7 months pregnant with what will be my second ever niece. Well, my first ever niece once removed. First ever niece once removed? That takes too long, let’s do – “niecelet”.

My sister’s daughter Janice is a teenager. It’s been so long since I’ve had a new baby in my family so, if you hear a certain knowing, avuncular quality in my voice, it’s because you are listening to an expecting uncle. I’m already getting some of those leather patches sewed onto the elbows of my windbreaker.

All week, Sabina and I have been reading baby books, and I am a veritable expert at this point. A baby at 7 months is as big as an eggplant. She can already get the hiccups and déjà-baby-vu, and has a fully developed sense of comedic timing. I’m holding an eggplant with me here in this studio to practice supporting her neck. Also to make sure I have something to eat when I get home. Sabina’s cleaned out the fridge pretty thoroughly.

Back at my place, Sabina’s been keeping the radio on 24/7, so the niecelet will know the owner of this dulcet baritone already loves her very much. Hello, almost-niece!

Doing all this reading together, it seems crazy to learn just how vulnerable we are, when we first enter the world. Did you know that a newborn doesn’t even have kneecaps yet? That it has a hole in the top of its skull, which must be taped shut so the newborn does not escape through it during the night? It’s amazing any of us survive to the shaming ceremonies at all!

Speaking of rites of passage, the annual Night Vale Science Fair is scheduled for this Monday night. Every fourth grader is expected to report to the Rec Center for a fun-filled evening of free programs and live demonstrations. Organizers say the kiddos will have a chance to make a 1:1 scale volcano, that spews real ash and molten igneous rock. They’ll learn how a pile of pennies can be transformed into a battery, simply by taking those pennies to Walgreens and exchanging them for a pack of Duracell double A’s. They’ll learn about about centripetal force by pouring a bucket full of water, and then filling out a worksheet on centripetal force. They’ll plant a bean sprout in a Styrofoam cup that won’t disintegrate until their grandchildren have set off on exploratory missions to find another planet that can support bean sprouts.

Hmm, what else might be on the Community Calendar this week, you ask? Well, let me work at my own pace over here, OK pal? Like all jobs worth doing, this one takes focus and patience. You can’t just rush through it. As my optometrist says, “measure twice, cut once, then do the left eye.” So I guess that’s really measure four times total and cut two times, but I had an astigmatism so I ended up just sticking with contacts anyway.

Sooo.. [papers rustling] let’s see here. [clears throat] M-h-h-h-hmm, this week’s events. On Tuesday night, head over to the Band Shell to hear a set from Ouroboros, the rock band that only plays covers of their own songs. Wednesday, Ablution in Fresca to celebrate the start of the Andorran New Year. Thursday is Thirsty Thursday. Consume no liquids. You’re gonna get real thirsty! Friday has been indefinitely delayed by weather at O’Hare, and is now pleading with a United representative for a hotel voucher to avoid sleeping in a plastic chair in Concourse C.

Early morning on Saturday, we are in for a rare astronomical treat. The Earth will fully eclipse the Sun, blotting out its light completely, so that only a ring of wispy blue remains visible against the blackness. Now this eclipse will not be observable on Earth, of course, and to our knowledge there is no planet on which this phenomenon could be observed. There’s just nothing on that particular vector in space, but at 4:13 AM on Saturday morning, the total eclipse will occur, and that blue corona will shine softly in the dark, like a delicate smoke ring. And that dim blue halo will represent the entirety of us. Our dramas, dreams, and disappointments. The first ride without the training wheels. Our 8th grade dances. Our double Windsors and our veils, our sleepless nights in waiting rooms. Our rush hour commuters, our dozing through recitals til the one we love goes on. Our crying in the car as the one we love leaves home. Just that thin filament of blue, on which we wage our peace.

The on Sunday, tacos and gun safety with Three-eyed Bill at First Methodist.

Stay tuned, savvy listeners, for in a moment I’ll be sharing Night Vale’s third quarter economic development report. To my knowledge, we’ve never had an economic development report before for any quarter, but the press release looked official, and we all know that new municipal arms of government form all the time. Arms that then pull back to be reabsorbed by the government shoulder from which they sprouted.

But before crunching those numbers, a quick message from today’s sponsor. Equinox Gym. At Equinox, we focus on the whole body. Particularly, the soft and vulnerable parts of that body. Stop by our windowless complex today to meet with a dietician about this month’s promotion, the Zima cleanse. Or for even faster results, nothing torches calories like our calorie torch. Also, new members this week to Equinox receive 60 days of free access to our popular Judgment Spa. This has been a word from our sponsor.

[booming voice] Now to business news. Whoa! Did that sound unusually powerful to you? Ooh, I sorta took myself by surprise there, like I grew a suit or something! [chuckles] [clears throat] The Night Vale Economic Development Board, or NV-ec-dev-B for short and cumbersome, sent a press release at the closing bell of the Night Vale stock exchange. The bulletin said that futures are down, way down. Although the recent past is trading briskly. In response to declining levels of interests, NV-ec-dev-B plans to incentivize consumer spending. At the start of tomorrow’s business day, they’ll launch an abject prompt campaign of xenophobia, branded as nationalism, branded as civic bride, branded as a 2008 F150 Ford truck with satellite radio, air conditioned seats, and a heavy-duty hitch to haul away whatever it is you’re trying to hide.

So make plans this weekend to head out towards the used car lot with your hands in the air and your checkbook in your mouth, to meet with a sales person about financing options. You might be surprised by how few years of indentured servitude can you get you behind the wheel of a Ford truck.

You know what cars make me think of? Well, Carlos. I guess, but everything makes me think of Carlos. And his name is an anagram of “Lo cars”. He’s out of town at Erlenmeyer Flask Con this week, and I miss something fierce! But what I was going to say is that the thought of buying a car reminds me of my niecelet! It’s extraordinary to think that she’ll be a teenager some day, getting her driver’s permit, then her license, then her crossbow - going through all of these phases we all pass through. It’s like there’s a future attached to her already. Inside Sabina, there’s a baby, and seated inside the baby there’s the toddler. And within her are the blueprints for the girl. And soon, she’ll be out here learning to play the sitar and considering vegetarianism, then voting and buying lottery tickets. Well, those are the same thing really. And I’ll get to bear witness to this blooming life. Some day, she might even decide to have a niece of her own.

[tearily] Oh, OK. Um, something is in young Cecil’s eye over here. Ooh! Hang tight, team, I’m just gonna run out and grab a bunch of tissues from the supply closet to remove this bothersome… [key turns in lock, falls down] OK, listeners, I must admit I’m in a state of concerned agitation here. When I tried to open the door of the studio, the handle – came off in my hand and and and and when I went to reinsert it, I found that the hole was (tamped) full of soft hot tar, which cannot be up to code. So now I find myself in a small, soundproof, airtight room with a doorless handle in my left hand and a handle-less door before me. I’m uh… Huh… I’m- I’m I’m uncertain of just how to proceed, uh, I can’t imagine there’s more than a few hours’ worth of oxygen in here, even if the studio’s potted fern works double duty on converting the carbon dioxide.

Oh man and of course, I left my phone in my jeans in the other room, you know, after I changed into my professional radio hosting unitard. I, OK, I need some time to assess the situation.

I’ll leave you to the weather.

[Weather: "If We Live" by Disparition]

OK. OK, OK, alright calm down, calm down Cecil, calm down, and you can beat this. be like the patient viper who does not strike until his prey is upon him. [sharp exhale] Be like the praying mantis whose head is a guitar pick. Keep your heart rate low and your focus steady, and good God, sit down, man. Save your strength. Breathe deep enough to get the air inside your brain and think. What would an uncle do?

Hmmm. Hummmmmmmm. [getting faster and higher] Hmmmmmmmmmmm, hmmmmmmmmmmm-hmmmmmmmmmmmm… Oh! OK, I’ve got it. Easy, I just need one of you to come and open the door. [chuckles] OK, here I am behaving like I’m alone, but of course I’m not alone, ha ha ha ha ha! Oh, I’ve got all of Night Vale listening. Ooh, that is a relief! Come to think of it, I imagine hundreds of you may be on your way already, and I can’t have the whole town rushing over all at once. That would cause traffic jams, hysteria, straightline winds gusting up to 60 knots. [laughs] If you’re on your way, just shoot quick flare into the sky, so that everybody knows you’re the one on the way. M-more importantly so that I know you’re on the way.

You guys, it’s like 8 PM, you’re not all in your PJ’s yet. Just need one person to make the trip. It’s like an 8-minute drive from your apartment, come on! Is… Is no one listening? I mean, the memo from management at the last all-staff meeting did mention low late night ratings but – this is not low, this is talking into a tin can on string whose other end is tied to a fire hydrant at the bottom of the sea, this is utter futility, this is falling in the woods and no one’s there to hear you. This is not seeing the Cecil for the trees, this is – Kafka meets Becket and tells him to talk to the hand. This is – stop, full stop. Cecil. [deep breath] This indignation does me no good at all. Just burns through my oxygen supply, which is running low already. This rate, I’ll never survive until the morning commuters tune in. Just think, Cecil. Think like an uncle.

Ooh. That’s it! There is at least one person listening. Babies never sleep thru the night, right? So you, niecelet, you should be able to hear me. Tho I imagine the sound of my voice may be muffled by the blankets on the guest bed and Sabina’s abdominal muscles. Alright, niecelet, I need you. We’ve got to find a way to wake up Sabina. I need you to kick, brace your little elbows on the soft wall behind you and really kick! Aim for a spot under the ribs, that roof of bone above you. And again. [pants rhythmically] Kick! Good, again! [pants rhythmically] Kick! Good, again! Now give it everything you’ve got this time! Sabina, wake up! This is an emergency! Wake u-

Oh. The station phone is ringing. God I forgot we even had this. uh caller, you’re on the air.

Sabina: Hey, Cecil. The baby was keeping me up and I turned on the station and-

Cecil: Sabina! Oh, thank God you’re awake! No, no it’s not a shtick, listen. I am trapped in the studio and I just need someone to open the door from the outs-

Sabina: Oh OK, I’ll be right there. But I’m starving, I may stop by Subway for a mashed potato and Nutella sandwich.

Cecil: No, please come now! We’ve got snacks in the breakroom pantry.. I think. I’ll set you up with some (gorb and gevilta) fish.

Sabina: Alright. Hey, did you know that there’s a faceless old woman living in your home? She keeps trying to put lotion on my belly, while I’m sleeping.

Cecil: Yeah, she does that. Listen, my spare office keys are by the lucky cat. See you soon, and thank you Sabina!

Sabina: Hey, enough with the lotion, lady!

Ooooohh. And thank you, niecelet! At negative two months old, you’ve already saved a life! And somehow I get the feeling mine might be just the first of many. If you need bailing out of a tight spot some day, you know who to call. I’m the baritone you can count on any time, kid, day or night shift.

Ahhh, man! I can’t wait for that door to open so I can get a lungful of fresh air. Oh, it’s funny how small a room can feel when you’re not allowed to leave. Oh, sorry I [chuckles] forgot who I was talking to for a second. Well, as soon as you’re out here breathing air yourself, I’m getting you a pair of cleats and a pair of baby shinguards and a baby cape, too. I can’t wait to meet you, little hero of a niecelet! But first, I’m making your mother some midnight eggplant parmesan.

Stay tuned next for the sounds of a door opening, a rush of oxygen-rich air, and a wheezing celebration of an overworked respiratory system. Aany second now. Aaaany second. Aaaaaanyyyy secondd.

[long silence]

Today’s proverb: Follow your heart. You need it. Where did it ever learn to walk? 

[aja154ever]

GRANRODEO LIVE TOUR 2017 Pierrot Dancin’ Zepp DiverCity Tokyo - 08/11/2017 (谷山の日)

Set List

Pierrot Dancin’

TRASH CANDY

ナミダバナ

Glorious days

FAT SHAPER

君に one way love

日常ホライゾン

Fake lover’s true heart

バラライ

Shake the Fake

Can Do

月に抱かれて眠りたい

BIG SUN

Darlin’

NO PLACE LIKE A STAGE

ROSE HIP BULLET

modern strange cowboy

UNDER THE SKY

Once & Forever

move on! イバラミチ

Y.W.F.

Punky Funky Love

So here it is again, my GRANRODEO live fan report. This is again coming from someone who is so into Taniyama Kishou but is relatively new to the GR fandom so my feelings are just overflowing. Ok, you’ve been warned. This is again based on my memories and people’s tweets. Long post under the cut!

In the last PieDan live, I was on the 2nd floor but this time I got to be on the 1st floor. Overall, as an audience it was honestly better to watch from the 2nd floor because you can see everything. No matter where Kiiyan goes around the stage, I can see every move and that was favorably pleasing. But this time, I landed in the 4th row in the center, and yes I was freaking out the moment I got there because damn, this is the nearest I’ve ever been to in all the events (GR and not) I have attended in my whole life. And this is Taniyama Kishou so this is 100% hazardous to my own being.

Pierrot Dancin’ - It was the third time I heard this live and this was the best vocal performance so far. Just near-perfect.

Kiiyan always does ナミダバナ really well. 

Again, Glorious Days and BIG SUN are best heard live. Idk why but these two songs really stand out to me as a CD and live listener.

Kiiyan was nearest to me during 君に one way love so I was like, “この愛に気付いてくれ! (Please notice my love)” LOL

日常ホライゾン  - Good vocals not only for Kiiyan, but for e-zuka-san! Yey! Really good “dududududu.” He actually sang some intro lines before they performed the song like, “Today is the last day” “Are you having fun?” “Next will be Budokan” “Will be waiting”

Kiiyan went off-tune at some parts of Fake lover’s true heart. Just mentioning because almost all songs were near-perfect. Btw, Fire Horns joined the performance from here.

バラライ OMG バラライ. This is one of my favorite GR songs ever and this is the first time I heard this live so I was soooooo happy AAAAAHHHHH. He was talking about life as intro then he asked what’s the color of life then I lost it

Shin-kun’s drum solo was quite short this time but he performed tricks as in throwing the drum sticks and having his eyes covered with the towel while playing.

Takita-san’s solo - OMG he went so near the center and I was just staring at his fingers that I think I can see his callouses lol. How can bass sound this good???!!! Uhhh

e-zuka-san’s solo - He performed tricks like playing the guitar on the back of his head, and “biting” the strings. I also fixed my eyes on his fingers while crying internally because these hands have produced such good music for years.

Can Do - Kiiyan came out with a weapon used for throwing wristbands (lol idk how to call it) but I remembered Kurobas Cup 2015 because SuwaJun did the same there and Can Do is basically KuroBas’ iconic theme. 

月に抱かれて眠りたい  - Surprisingly, I didn’t cry. It was my first time to hear this live, and I already expected that it would sound so beautiful. But no, Kiiyan once again surpassed my expectation because it was so, very, uhh, really, sorry, just out of words  ❤ 

Darlin’ - NO PLACE LIKE A STAGE - ROSE HIP BULLET - modern strange cowboy - Ok so GRANRODEO was trying to kill us with this energy-sucking line-up. And again, this was my first time in the very front where people are expectedly the wildest. You didn’t need to jump because the crowd is bringing you with them. Head bangs, body bangs. Don’t mind the feet stepping on you because you also do step on others’ without your intention. I cannot say it enough but for me, NO PLACE LIKE A STAGE WAS DEFINITELY THE BEST SONG OF THE NIGHT.

Kiiyan thanks the crowd for GR is only able to accomplish all these things because of the fans, who he calls their sun and darling. And he can only wish to see more beautiful sights with the fans, under this sky. And cue, UNDER THE SKY.

Once & Forever - Y.W.F. - The crowd was obviously ecstatic with this two in the encore. Kiiyan’s singing skill was superb.

The crowd did better engaging in move on! イバラミチ today than the first time (in Mezamashi Live).

Punky Funky Love - I’d always be biased towards Can Do for encore but PFL was also lively and great as hell esp with Fire Horns.

MC and Other Points

Ok wait let me just say this sorry, back from the first break, Kiiyan appeared looking so fresh that I got captivated again. He was all sweaty earlier, not that I didn’t want that. You know I’ve seen a lot of people look best wearing red, black, or white and Kiiyan is one. But how dare you look so good in blue why just how

Idk what song this happened and I don’t even care anymore, but Kiiyan was on the center rubbing his wristband on his thighs, groin, on himself. Uhhhh how am I still alive

Kishomi appeared at some point after 月に抱かれて眠りたい.

e-zuka was glad with the tour and in the last day, he can see the crowd’s faces as beer. He also felt like wanting to do G12 the following week.

When Kiiyan asked Shin-kun for his thoughts regarding the tour, “How was it with GRANRODEO? Isn’t everybody good? Especially me?” And Shin-kun just awkwardly smiles and nods in agreement. Shin-kun claimed that today especially left an impression on him. He shared that backstage, when he went to GR’s dressing room, Kiiyan was really loud today; he even imitated Kiiyan’s laughter. As it turned out Kiiyan was watching a baseball match on TV.

At first, Kiiyan was having a hard time segueing from MC to UNDER THE SKY so he called out “e-zuka-san, tasukete! (save me).” e-zuka-san then goes like, “Live shows are different every time. The people who come, the songs, the weather, the color of the sky, the mood.” Then he proceeds to sing 慟哭ノ雨 instead!

Kiiyan said that out of all the 18 performances for the PieDan live tour, today was the most fun. 

Kiiyan called out the crowd to say “kawaii”

“Kiiyan is?”

KAWAII!

“The Kiiyan who just became 42 years old is??”

KAWAII!!

“That Kiiyan is??”

KAWAII!!

“You guys are more kawaii!”

KYAAAAAAAAAAAA

Calling them back for encore took some time like my throat was already dried up from the exhausting line-up but there I was still shouting “RODEO” for how many minutes already. Now this is the reason why. When they came back, Kiiyan was blindfolded, with e-zuka-san holding his two hands guiding him as they walk. (That was really cute!)

A birthday cake was presented and then everyone sang him a happy birthday. And Kiiyan’s smile was precious. 

e-zuka-san and the rest wore white shirts with a doodle of Kiiyan’s face which turned out to be drawn by e-zuka-san. The words 「紀章愛」「きーやんラブ」(Kishou love, Kiiyan love) were also printed on the shirt. When the staff also went out wearing the shirt, Kiiyan exclaimed, “That’s creepy!” When the crowd shouted that they also want to have the shirt, e-zuka-san responded, “Okay that’s 20,000 yen!”

Kiiyan ofc expected that something would come up since it’s his birthday. When he removed his blindfold, he somehow thought that his parents would actually be brought there in front of him. “I was prepared to cry. I, who has never cried in front of people even once.” LOL Kiiyan who are you kidding

Kiiyan describes how his feelings of gratitude couldn’t be put into words. That really, love isn’t something expressed through words.

He ate one strawberry saying it was sour but delicious. He wanted to throw strawberries to the audience but ofc that couldn’t be done lol.

They also wanted to cut and give out the cake to everyone in the crowd. Lol there were 2000+ people

When they returned for the last encore, they went out jumping (not walking) in line towards the stage. This time Kiiyan was also wearing the Kiiyan shirt. He said, “A shirt with your own face on it, just how much do you love yourself?”

Kiiyan shared that when his mother found out that Punky Funky Love was by GRANRODEO, she said that it was their best.

They all hugged each other in the end. And apparently, OMG (I just saw this on Twitter I wasn’t able to see this live bec I got pushed back wth), Kiiyan actually removed his shirt and threw it to the crowd. AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

Photos/Posts from Official Accounts:

The GR classic line-up was the best but frustratingly, this was also the time when I started getting pushed back from my satisfactory view from the front row. So half of the live, I got to see well but then half of it, I was mainly seeing the hands and head of RGRB (and I was almost eating the hair of the RG in front of me). Which was really sad, because I came here to watch Kiiyan, GR, so PLEASE. I’ve never hated my height this much. I should've come wearing the highest heels. And this is why I’m not sure anymore if I would prefer to be on the 1st floor in the next live shows. I am now torn between seeing Kiiyan up close for a few times then totally not seeing him for a couple of songs from the 1st floor, or seeing him all the time from a far from the 2nd floor.

ANYWAY, of course overall, it was again a very, very fun and gratifying night. It was the last day of the tour, and more than anything else, it was Taniyama Kishou’s birthday. I got to personally sing Happy birthday to this year’s most important person to me. I was constantly yelling cheers, but I shouted my loudest when I said “Omedetou!” and “Arigatou!” even if those words will never be enough to express how happy and grateful I am to have met Kiiyan.  ❤ ❤

Next comes G12!! 

[mvssmallow]

Cloudy With A Chance

Part 11: …of Apple Pi.

Masterlist

Maybe in a movie Jiwon would’ve kissed Hanbin as they walked along the Han River after the Exhibition. Maybe they would’ve linked hands nervously and heard 90s RnB music playing faintly in the distance as a light breeze ruffles through Hanbin’s hair.

But none of that actually happens. Out of the corner of his eye, Jiwon saw the moment come….then he watched it go, floating away with an apologetic shrug.

He’s okay with it. They’re hungry, tired and uncomfortable in their clothes so instead of being in a movie they sit under the bridge in untucked shirts and rolled up sleeves, passing plates of food and bubble tea between them, talking easily about rap songs, tattoo plans and how to deal with the fact that Donghyuk politely threatened him at the gallery (answer: when the time comes, move to Mexico if grovelling and bribery don’t work.)

There were too many people around for them to do anything else but even when they were alone, nothing happened. Even when he gets caught staring at Hanbin’s mouth as it sucks on the straw. Even with the dim light offering some cover. Even then, with the opportunity flashing at him in neon lights, nothing happened. He just took an extra big mouthful of chocolate waffle as Hanbin smiled around his straw.

But it’s okay. It’s okay, he tells himself. It will happen when it happens.

He tries not to be too disappointed when they don’t kiss goodnight either. Instead, he watches Hanbin stumble out the car, dragging his black blazer haphazardly behind him and yawning repeatedly.

“Thanks for tonight. It was good.” Hanbin says through the car window. “Maybe the next time we hang out there will be less people around though?”

“With less interrogations and threats?” He adds.

“Yeah.”

“Next time it’ll just be me and you.”

“Okay.” Hanbin yawns as he leans heavily against the passenger window. “I better go, otherwise I’ll just sleep in your car.”

Jiwon honestly wouldn’t even mind but he knows it’s probably a bit too early for that sort of thing.

“Go. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

Hanbin nods and rubs his eyes. It’s a move that makes him look much younger than his 25 years and Jiwon gets the urge to hug him to his chest. The fiery Hanbin is all smart words and sharp teeth that sink into his skin without mercy but the tired, sad and vulnerable Hanbin is something that scares him, not because he can’t handle it (he knows he can) but because it reaches down into his core and drags all of his protective instincts to the surface. He’d probably follow Hanbin straight into Hell if he asked him to and run twice as fast if he didn’t.

“Okay. Well, Goodnight. Thanks for the ride. Drive safely.”

“Night. Sleep well.”

Hanbin waves as he walks towards his apartment, turning back after a few steps to yell out, “Hey, text me when you get home! So I know.”

So I know.

Jiwon wonders what that means exactly. He wonders about it all the way home, right up to the moment when he gets to his door and lets his keys hang in the lock so he can type out a text.

[im home. Didn’t die. Sorry if I woke you. xxj]

He drags himself through a quick shower and throws on some clean boxers before collapsing face down onto his bed. He’s just about to drift off when he hears the muted buzz of his phone next to him.

[good. It’s too much work finding a replacement.]

[im irreplcble. thats hard to spell]

[why don’t you use auto carrot]

[whts that? Spellcheck 4 bunnies?]

[you’d know…. bunny]

[whatever you say princess]

[if you call me that i’m breaking up with you]

[but youre not allowed to]

[I’m falling asleep. Sorry. Text me when you wake up.]

[go sleep. Night. xxj]

[night bunny xxh]

It doesn’t take long to fall asleep after that, not when dreamworld beckons him in with images of dimple smiles, undercuts and rabbits.

He’s still tired when his alarm goes off at 9am but the physical lethargy is offset by the kind of mental optimism that you can only get when your life is on the right track. He stretches out underneath his warm sheets, smiling at the ceiling and watching the sun filter through the gaps in his curtains. His hand smooths over the empty space next to him and he wonders what it might be like if it wasn’t so empty one day.

Somewhere on the other side of Seoul, probably still asleep, is chaos, art and random useless facts all rolled up into a riddle wrapped enigma. But he loves chaos and he loves that that is what he belongs to now. The revelation echoes in his head, the repetition doing nothing to diminish the thrill that he gets every time he thinks about Hanbin. He buries his head into his pillow and groans loudly. When did he get this lame and embarrassing? He would never hear the end of it if June knew the truth.

He should really get up and hit the gym to sweat all this out. But not before he digs around the sheets to find his phone.

[good morning. Guess wat? Didn’t die in the night. Sorry if I woke you xxj]

His cinnamon toast cereal tastes extra sweet this morning as he watches the news and tries to catch the weather report as it scrolls across the bottom of the screen. Outside his door he can hear his apartment block waking up and coming to life, there’s already music playing, a dog barking and a child’s high pitched giggle. Has it always been this idyllic? Maybe he was imagining it. Or maybe this is what life through Rose Tinted sunglasses feels like: one long movie with a happy ending.

He’s pulling on his gym shorts when his phone buzzes with a message alert.

[hey bunny.glad you’re alive. its too early, i’m going back to sleep]

[wait are you free 2moro? I’m going to get roses for rp, want to come?]

[sure ok good night xxh]

[lol okay, btw it’s Sunny today wth the chance of a late cold front. Call me if you get bored. xxj]

It’s 11:30 and he’s just walking out the gym doors when he gets another message.

[there are like 30 different types of cereal in this new store.]

He turns on the handsfree function in his car and dials Hanbin’s number as he pulls out of the car park.

“Are you calling me? Why are you calling me? I’m buying food.” Hanbin says, as if he was completely surprised by the turn of events. “Why is it so noisy?”

“Sorry, I’m driving.”

“Going somewhere? Also: hi.”

“Hey.” It never fails to make him smile, how off kilter conversations with Hanbin can be. “Yeah I just left the gym, going to Yoyo and June’s place now because they’ve got some sort  of car emergency.”

“Oh okay. I’ve got dinner with my parents tonight. I don’t know if I should bring some alcohol or a lot of alcohol.” Hanbin says glumly. “Actually, I don’t think there’s enough alcohol in the world for this.”

“That bad huh?”

He laughs lightly, mainly to be polite, but he really has no idea how they’re going to deal with the parent issue when the time comes. They will probably survive dinner with his parents but he has no idea what they’re going to do about Hanbin’s parents. In the back of his mind, he knows it’s unfair to paint them in a negative light before they’ve even met but at the same time, he’s learnt to never ignore his gut instincts and his gut tells him that it’s going to be difficult at best or a complete disaster.

Hanbin groans on the other end. “They’re going to get on my case about why I’m still apparently a sad single hermit. Maybe pass a few phone numbers my way because they think they’re being helpful.”

“They sound like my parents.”

“Maybe I should just tell them.” Hanbin says quietly but it comes across loud and clear and trips the alarm in his head.

“Hang on a sec.” He quickly finds a spot on a side street to pull over and park. “What do you want to tell them?”

“That I’m not single anymore. It’d be nice to tell them one less lie.” There’s a sad chuckle at the end of it that just makes him want to reach through the phone connection to hug Hanbin tightly.

“Oh. Okay, if you’re sure.” He replies, relieved. “I kinda thought you wanted tell them everything. About you and…me.”

There’s a sharp cackle on the other line, like the idea was beyond comprehension. “I’m feeling brave Jiwon, not suicidal. I don’t know what to do about that at all right now but maybe I can just get them off my back about girlfriends for awhile.”

“Aren’t they gonna want to meet her?”

“Yeah probably.”

“But she doesn’t exist.”

There’s rustling on Hanbin’s end. “Should I get Honey Nut Crunch or Froot Loops?”

The conversational whiplash disorientates him briefly before he catches up with Hanbin’s train of though.

“Froot Loops? No, don’t get that. Froot Loops are so unhealthy. It’s all sugar. Get cinnamon toast cereal. The gluten and sugar free version. That’s the one I have.”

He can practically hear Hanbin’s grimace. “Is it also taste free?”

“No!” He laughs. “It’s really good. I mean, you’re not eating wholemeal bran but at least you’re trying.”

“Well….okay.” Hanbin replies, entirely unconvinced.

“I’ll come over and eat the rest if you hate it.”

“Win-Win situation for you there.” Hanbin says flatly. “Look at how that turned out.”

“Yeah, amazing.” He smiles to himself before his mind returns to what they were talking about before. “So hey, are you really sure you want to just tell your parents? Won’t it create like 10 more problems for you?”

Okay, so he’s selfish. He was looking forward to spending some stress-free time with Hanbin now that everything had settled down. The thought of going through the complicated aspects of their relationship all over again just makes him want to go back to sleep.

“You think I should wait?”

“It’s up to you, Hanbin. If you feel like you want to tell them, then that’s what you should do.” He says, trying to be supportive despite his inner monologue.

“But?”

“But what?”

“You want to say something about it. I can tell.”

“No….it’s your decision.” He says carefully.

There’s a loud sigh. “Jiwon. Just tell me. I’m asking.”

He takes a breath. “Well, I was just thinking that it’s not always a good idea to tell them things like that without having some kind of plan. I mean, at least have a back up girl to help bail you out if they want to meet her last minute. That’s what parents like to do, spring these surprise attacks. It happened to me and look where I am now- still going on pointless church dates.”

There’s a sigh and pause as Hanbin thinks about his words. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. I haven’t thought it through properly.”

He exhales slowly in relief. “Yeah, there will be other chances to tell them.”

“You know this means I’ll probably have to go on some fake dates then? Like you did?”

“It’s okay. Just be really boring. She’ll probably never call you again.”

“Is that what you do?”

“Sometimes. I usually just play the friendzone and drop in a few really polarising things. Like wanting 7 kids and moving to an apple orchard. There’s been approximately zero second dates after that.” He says with a laugh.

“Really? That sounds kinda nice though. Well, maybe not seven kids. Maybe four.”

He freezes mid laugh. Hanbin’s earnest consideration of his ridiculous date tactics takes him by surprise.

“I was joking Hanbin.”

“No you weren’t. 50% of all jokes are true.”

There’s no one around but he blushes anyway. “That sounds like something you just made up.”

“It’s legit I swear! I read it somewhere. I bet you really do want to have a bunch of kids on a farm. Right?”

“Maybe.” He says noncommittally.

There’s laughter on the other end. “Knew it. You live in the 1950s but it’s a cute dream to have. I’ll remember to drop something like that on my fake date.”

“Wait a second. You said four kids. You want to have four kids?”

“Yeah. Maybe? One day.”

“Oh. Cool.”

It’s then that his mind does that annoying thing where it takes an idea and fills his head with all sorts of futurescape images. What would Hanbin’s kids look like? What would his kids look like? Does Hanbin think his kids will be their kids? How can he get out of this conversation?

It gives him a headache thinking too far into the future. He never used to think about the details but lately, he catches himself staring at couples with small children and dreaming of scenarios which weren’t so impossible. He’s optimistic but he’s also realistic, there’s a line in the sky and having biological kids was so far beyond the line that it was in the realms of impossible fiction.

“Hey? You still there?”

“Yeah Yeah. I’m still here.”

“I better go. I need to get the shopping done before I go pick up my sister from dance class.”

He breathes out another sigh of relief. He loves talking to Hanbin but there are times when serious topics just sneak up on them and it gets too much, even over the phone.

“Yeah I need to go too. Text me later, about your dinner?”

“Yeah I will.”

“And I guess I’ll come over at like 10 tomorrow? If you still want to come to June’s?”

“Yeah, I’ll be ready.”

“Cool. Okay.” There’s an awkward pause because he’s never been good at saying goodbye. No matter how overwhelming their conversations gets, when the time comes there’s always a part of him that’s reluctant to let go, even if it’s only temporary. “Well umm…”

“Say bye, you loser.” Hanbin laughs on the other end.

“Okay! Fine. BYE.”

“Bye bunny. See you tomorrow.”

“Okay, bye.”

“And now you hang up.”

“Okay.” His finger hovers over the End-Call button but he can’t make himself push it.

“You’re still there.”

“Yup.”

“Okay well, there’s an old lady giving me death glares at the checkout so I really have to go. Bye bunny!”

Hanbin hangs up first. It’s how he prefers their calls to go because there’s something so difficult about hanging up on Hanbin. Or dropping him off and watching him walk away. Or being awake and knowing he’s still sleeping. He tells himself that he’ll be completely fine watching Hanbin go on fake dates but he knows it won’t be that simple when it happens.

Shaking his head, he starts the car to rejoin the flow of traffic.

The sun is setting by the times he gets home from fixing Yoyo’s car and has a second shower to wash off all the sweat and grease. He’s on the couch watching Iron Chef when the phone buzzes on the coffee table.

[pls save me]

[what happened? want me to come get you?]

[i said SAVE ME. not GET ME KILLED]

[how drunk are you]

[not drunk at all]

[tragedy, sorry for your loss]

[i miss you]

The message surprises him with its suddenness. He knows Hanbin can be unpredictable but he’s always taken aback by just how much it knocks him off his feet.

[i miss you too. U ok? Bc i can really come and get you]

[yeah I’m fine. Hanbyul’s distracting them with her ballet trophy.]

[she won something?]

[they give them out to every kid]

[lolz don’t be rude]

[I’m not! It’s the truth. Ahhhh I gotta go. xxh]

[ok call me later. xxj]

It’s midnight and he’s in bed watching the late 24-hour news when his phone lights up next to him.

[are you still up?]

He can’t think of a decent short reply so dials Hanbin’s number instead.

“It was horrible.” Hanbin says as soon as he picks up.

“Wanna tell me all about it?”

“They were on my back for twenty minutes about being a weird recluse and well, long story short, they gave my number to my dad’s business partner’s daughter. So I’m basically fucked, no matter how it ends.”

“Oh…..Shit.”

“Yeah.” Hanbin agrees miserably.

“Well….” He starts, trying to be positive but trailing off when he can’t think of anything to say. Hanbin, on the other hand, has plenty to say.

“It’s so bad. I just know it. If she hates me, she’ll tell her parents. Then they’ll tell my parents. And it might be weird at their company. That will get my dad pissed at me. Again. Even though I don’t even like girls and told them all night that I was too busy to have a relationship! Why do I have to deal with this stupid fucking situation Jiwon? On my list of stupid fucking situations, this would have to be number 1.”

“Are you drunk?”

“A little bit.”

“Are you at home?”

“YES.”

“Okay, good. But listen, don’t worry too much about it Hanbin. We’ll figure something out when it happens.”

“Why can’t we figure it out now?” Hanbin whines.

“Because it’s midnight and she hasn’t called you yet.” He reasons.

“Why can’t you just fix this?!”

He laughs despite their situation. “I promise I’ll think of something. It’ll be okay. I got through them, you will too.”

There’s a heavy dramatic sigh on the other end before Hanbin’s sleepy voice comes through again, this time accompanied by a yawn. “I’m in bed. Tell me something. I don’t want to think about girls anymore.”

“Umm, what do you want to hear?”

“Tell me about your seven kids and apple orchard. What kind of kids are you gonna have? And what kind of apples?”

The request catches him off guard, he didn’t expect this conversation to come back so soon. Or at all.

“Oh. Um. Probably all kinds of apples. I need to do some research on Apple species. You know any Apple experts?”

“I’m an Apple expert. I like the red ones and the Macbook Pro.”

“So helpful. Real expert.”

“Tell me more. I want to fall asleep.”

“Okay. Well. Firstly, no offence, but I’m gonna need an expert who knows more about apples than “red” and “laptop”. I kinda want to live on one of those big properties where the dogs and kids and chickens can run everywhere.  We’ll have to get one of those gigantic country farmhouses with a billion bedrooms because if the kids are gonna be anything like you, they’ll all want their own rooms.”

There’s no protest so he continues.

“I heard you can do a lot with apples though. You eat them, juice them, dry them, make all sorts of stuff with them, including pie! I’m not completely crazy you know. It might be a fake dream but I did attempt some research to make it sound legit.”

“Anyways, it’d be really cool sitting on the back porch and watching the sun set over all the trees. It’ll probably be really quiet and so far away from the city that you could probably see all those galaxies that you’re obsessed with.”

He waits for a response but gets none.

“Hanbin?” When there’s only breathing on the other line, he knows that Hanbin fell asleep. “Well. That’s the dream anyway. Goodnight baby.”

                                                            *

The birds chirp gleefully outside his window but Hanbin wants to die.

Actually, he wants to kill his phone first then follow it straight into hell.

“What?!” He grumbles into the offending device.

“It’s 9am.” Jiwon’s voice comes through, slightly concerned. “You okay? You don’t have to-”

“No. I want to.” He insists, despite his head spinning and his body protesting loudly as he stretches in bed.

“Okay. See you soon.”

He’s hungover and so dizzy that takes him three attempts to open the toothpaste cap and even longer to differentiate the shampoo bottle from the conditioner. It’s a relief when he finally sits down on his couch and eats cinnamon toast cereal without the world spinning around him.

Jiwon knocks on his door at 10:03am. He wanted to tease him about the promptness but decides against it, partly because his brain wasn’t exactly back online yet but mainly because Jiwon looked so adorable standing in his doorway like a hopeful prom date.

“Sorry I fell asleep on you last night. Your voice does that.” He says as he settles into the (now very familiar) passenger’s seat.

“My voice puts you to sleep?” Jiwon teases.

“Yeah it does. It’s sedating….but in a good way.” He knows that he must sound completely spaced out right now and wonders if Jiwon will pick up on it.

“So you don’t remember anything I said?”

“No, I do. Something about apple orchards and friendzoning girls and having seven kids.”

Jiwon looks over with a cautious expression. “That’s it? You don’t remember the rest?”

He racks his brain but he can barely remember what he just had for breakfast. “No. Should I have? Was it something memorable?”

Jiwon shakes his head, oddly relieved. “No no, nothing major.” There’s a grin at the end of it before the Beast roars into life down the street.

He’s feeling more human by the time they walk through the doors of June’s tattoo shop.

“Ahh look, it’s dumb and dumber! Finally here to ruin my fucking day.” June says brightly from his position in the counter.

“You really need to work on your greetings.” Jiwon says.

“It’s part of my charm.” June winks before hopping off the counter. He hugs Jiwon despite the protests before coming over to pat Hanbin on the shoulder. “Hey Hanbin. How’ve you been? This kid giving you any grief?”

“Of course he is. It’s driving me crazy.” He says with a smile.

“Knew it!” June says loudly. “Return him to the store and get an upgrade! He’s literally 2000 and late- a completely useless and out of date model.”

“Shut up Grandpa!” Jiwon calls out from the back kitchen.

“Ahh everything feels normal again.” June sighs. “Hey! I need to show you something. I got a book on geometrical line tattoos. Thought you might like something in it.”

Hanbin’s oddly flattered by the thoughtfulness “Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Thanks.”

A heavy book is thrust into his hands as they settle into their seats. He flips through the pages, breathing in the new book smell and mentally ticking off some designs he already likes.

Jiwon comes back out and hands him a cow print mug. “Black. No milk. No sugar.”

“Thanks.” He smiles over the rim of the mug, feeling lame and dopey.

“You’re welcome.” Jiwon smiles back.

June rolls his eyes between them. “And yet he forgets my birthday.”

Jiwon breaks the eye contact to scowl. “That was one time and you said I was forgiven when I got you the PS3.”

“Did I? That doesn’t seem like something I’d say at all.”

Jiwon groans. “Can we just get started? Instead of sitting around and arguing like always?”

“You’re right. We can work and continue to argue like always.” June says with a nod.

Hanbin settles in his chair as the ink gun buzzes into life. He sticks Post-It notes on the pages of the design book that interest him and feels his worries melt away. It was a weird combination really, the contrast between the sterile smell of alcohol disinfectant and the familiar herbal fragrance from the tea Jiwon made. It was almost as contradictory as the mechanical sound of the tattoo gun bouncing off the soothing peach coloured walls to accompany the Al Green song that June has playing over the speakers. It was mismatched and scrappy and strange but he loves it. It all reminds him of Jiwon in a way; how he was the perfect combination of hard industrial angles and soft warm smiles.

He is so deep inside his head that he completely misses the conversation happening in front of him.

“Right Hanbin?”

He looks up, dazed. “Huh?”

“Warren G is the better rapper but Dre is the better producer, right?”

“Bullshit.” June replies. “Dre is better at both.”

“They’re step-brothers.” He says absentmindedly.

“That’s so not answering the question.” June mutters.

He shakes the cobwebs from his fuzzy mind and starts again. “Well, Warren has a smoother technique if you’re only arguing about the west coast rap style. Dre is definitely better at producing though. Eminem wouldn’t be anywhere without Dre. So yeah, Warren might be the slightly better rapper but Dre’s definitely the better producer.”

They both stare at him before Jiwon looks across as June with a smug smile. “Told you so.”

June turns the ink gun back on. “Oh great, you’re gonna start arguing as a team now? I’m so excited about this new development.” He says blandly.

Jiwon gives him a wink, which wasn’t so much a wink as a co-ordinated blink with both eyes.

“Maybe Yoyo can come here and help you win all these arguments then?” Hanbin says as politely as he can.

Jiwon laughs loudly, trying not to move his arm but failing miserably.

June gives them both a withering look before turning the ink gun off again. “Okay. Very funny. You’re very funny over there Hanbin. But you just made your idiot boyfriend here move so one of the roses is now a bit crooked. Congratulations, you both played yourselves!”

Jiwon looks over at him with a grin. “Totally worth it.”

“Ahh, let’s take a break. Your ugly face is annoying and my back is kinda killing me today.” June announces, stretching in his chair before going outside with his cup of tea.

Hanbin wanders over and sits in June’s seat, peering at the bloody mess of lines on Jiwon’s forearm. “Sorry about the rose.”

“I’m not. You should’ve seen his face! It’s been ages since I’ve seen someone take a shot at his ego.”

Hanbin gives him a wry smile. “You want another cup of tea?”

“Yeah, thanks baby.”

It comes out so easily and casually but he still freezes like a deer in headlights, unsure what to do or say as the butterflies in his stomach zoom around like they’re all on acid.

“Sorry. It just came out.” Jiwon says quickly.

“It’s okay. No big deal.” He says in a strained voice before walking off into the kitchen to fill the kettle with shaky hands.

He’s standing at the bench waiting for the kettle to boil when he can hear Jiwon shuffling in behind him.

“You don’t like it. The name.” It was more a statement than a question.

Hanbin shakes his head but doesn’t turn around. “No, I like it. I’ve just never been called that before. It was just kinda weird, that’s all.”

He feels a breath against the back of his neck and the heat radiating off Jiwon’s body as he comes to stand behind him. “Is it cool enough for you?”

“No. It’s terrible.” He says, smiling to himself.

Two tattooed arms come to rest on either side of him, caging him in the middle. His heart races in anticipation as he stares at Richard Parker’s tail and the new crooked rose on Jiwon’s tanned skin.

“So you’re okay if I keep calling you that?”

“Yeah, it’s fine.”

“Okay…baby…”

The way it comes out sends a shiver all the way down his spine. There’s lips against his ear, it’s barely a touch but it makes him so giddy that he feels like he’s about to jump off a cliff or do something equally stupid.

And then he hears it again, in Jiwon’s deep rough growl, the one that’s gentle but demanding and playful but emphatically possessive.

“Baby…”

After that, Hanbin couldn’t stop himself from turning around even if he wanted to. He sees shiny half hooded eyes for a split second before Jiwon leans down and closes the small distance between them, his mouth fitting over Hanbin’s with a soft warm pressure.

Jiwon tastes like earl grey tea and cinnamon toast cereal and he kisses like he lives life: confident, curious, full of purpose and with no room for doubt.  

And messy.

If there’s one word to describe Jiwon, messy would be the first thing that comes to mind.

Hanbin is pressed against the bench as their kiss deepens, his lips already feeling swollen and there’s so much saliva between them that he can feel it across his jaw. His hands grabs the front of Jiwon’s t-shirt when he feels an insistent tongue trying to lick his mouth open, they both moan when he finally does.

But just as he’s trying to remember everything about the moment the kettle suddenly begins it’s high pitched and obnoxious beeping. It takes him by surprise, startling his eyes open and making him jump forward to twist his hands into the fabric of Jiwon’s tshirt so forcibly that he feels it stretching and protesting.

“Fuck that’s loud.” Jiwon remarks as he pulls away, slightly out of breath. He reaches over to turn the kettle off and starts laughing when he sees Hanbin’s stunned face. “You okay? Had another heart attack?”

Hanbin narrows his eyes and shoves at the solid chest in front of him. “Yes you jerk! Don’t pretend like it didn’t scare you too.”

“Maybe a little.” Jiwon murmurs before pulling him back against his chest. “Come back here. Kiss me again.”

Hanbin carefully grabs his right arm above the reddened tattooed area and leans back in. It’s just as hot and sweet and infuriatingly good as the first time. He’s tries to catalogue every happy sound Jiwon makes, the way he tastes and the hard wall of muscle underneath his soft worn-in t-shirt.

It’s then that the front door slams shut, followed by June’s sheepish, “Sorry, it’s just me! My bad!”

They reluctantly break for a second time, Jiwon frowning and groaning in frustration. “Why is the universe cock blocking me?” He mutters.

Hanbin colours at the choice of words. “I don’t know. Did you pay your taxes this year?”

“Yes! And now I’m being punished.” Jiwon whines, indignant.

They hear June shuffling around the main room so Hanbin smooths out the front of Jiwon’s tshirt and pushes him away.

“Go. I’ll bring out the tea. I don’t want him asking about this. You know he’s gonna tease you all day.”

“Hey by the way, if he ever hears you calling me bunny, he’ll never take me seriously again.”

Hanbin gives him a smile as he reaches up to wipe at Jiwon’s lower lip with his thumb. “He never took you seriously to begin with. Now go, bunny.”

Jiwon leans in to give him one last kiss in his cheek. “Okay, baby.”

He gives Hanbin a dopey smile as he backs out of the kitchen. Hanbin shakes his head but does nothing to stop his own dopey smile from forming.

It takes him twice as long to make the tea this time. He has to stop and replay what just happened, occasionally touching his lips to see if he can still feel anything on them.

He pours the tea carefully and tries to keep his face neutral when he brings it out to the main room, sneaking looks at Jiwon’s face when he and June are both peering down at the inky roses and discussing the best way to fix the crooked lines (Jiwon asks that they stay crooked).

Before he can stop himself, he lets out a sigh that’s way too loud and causes both guys to look over.

“What was that for? We keeping you up?” June asks. “You need colouring books over there?”

He scoffs. “Is that what Yoyo does when you’re annoying him?”

June gives him sullen look before turning to Jiwon, “Can you get a new boyfriend? This one is too salty.”

“Nope, sorry bro. I’m keeping him forever.” Jiwon laughs happily and gives him another wink. Stupidly enough, right in the middle of all his thoughts, the only thing Hanbin can think about is the fact that Jiwon still can’t wink properly.

Oh well. He wants to stay forever and wonky winks are only a small price to pay.

[seedfinance]

How To Make Money During Wedding Season

CasarsaGuru / Getty Images

At the end of April the headline in the Los Angeles Times, which an entire industry had been expecting for more than a year, ran the headline: “Wedding jobs and part-time jobs are coming back.”

It was welcome news that was long overdue. As crowds and gatherings fell victim to global quarantine, couples in love across the country and around the world postponed their big days.

See: Small Businesses Promoted by a Famous Visit Read more: How Small Businesses Hurt All Americans

Now weddings are back – and the small businesses and side gigs that make them possible are back.

If you’re looking to make some cash this summer and fall, or if you’re finally ready to go all the way and start a small business, the wedding industry is booming. It’s no secret that weddings are expensive – that’s because it is difficult to hold a wedding in style, and the people who do it well are well paid for their services.

The wedding business is back in action. Here are 10 ways to redeem money.

Last updated: June 14, 2021

Beautiful delicious white wedding cake ceremony at the table.

Skilled bakers can make wedding cakes

According to The Knot, the average wedding cake costs $ 500 – between $ 1.50 and $ 12 each – but it can easily run into the thousands. Since cutting the cake is still an important part of most weddings, it takes real skill and experience to create a wedding cake that both looks and tastes the way it is for the occasion.

According to TRUIC, if you have the background and the skills, you can start your own cake business for less than $ 1,000. However, some of the fees to consider include government licenses, insurance, bakery supplies, ingredients, specialized mobile transportation and refrigeration equipment, and marketing costs.

Options: The 11 Best Lucrative Side Hustle Ideas: Earn More

Waiter carrying plate of meat dish at a festive event, party or wedding reception.

Start a catering business – or more likely, a gig for someone else

As opposed to creating and delivering a single cake, catering a live event, which happens to be the most important day in a person’s life, is a daunting undertaking that requires a deep understanding of business, commercial hospitality, and event planning. Entering the industry requires large upfront investments in vehicles, equipment, kitchen space, licenses, insurance, and manpower – running a catering business isn’t a side job.

The story goes on

However, working on a contract basis for a catering company can be a lucrative and reliable part-time job during the wedding season. Since you only work the gigs you want, it’s flexible working. The national median wage is $ 13, according to ZipRecruiter.

If you’re looking for: 22 side gigs that can make you richer than a full-time job

Young sexy woman photographer photographs the bride in the studio.

Wedding photographers can make good money

If you’re a seasoned photographer, weddings can make a good living – the national median salary is nearly $ 105,000, according to ZipRecruiter. However, this requires an upfront investment in equipment and knowledge. Sophisticated cameras, lenses, and software run in the lower thousands, but your single wedding fee can cover those costs – if you’re good at it.

According to Profoto, to get good, you need to learn and practice in all weather and light conditions until you master your equipment. If you ever want to get hired, you need to build a portfolio of what you can do by doing free gigs in the beginning.

How To Make Money Blogging In 2021: 5 Ways To Make Money From Anywhere

Wedding location in the barn on the County Fairgrounds

Artistic types can create custom gifts and decorations

Weddings need centerpieces, wedding favors, arbors, and all sorts of other physical items that add ambience and art to the day. If you have a flair for arts, crafts, and handicrafts, you could make a sweet sideline of providing custom crafts, gifts, decorations, favors, or anything else that makes weddings beautiful and unique. There is no way to calculate your fees, costs, or income in general – these are as individual as your craft – but you should plan on going to a quality website or professional online store to showcase your work.

How to Make Money Fast: 19 Proven Ways

Wedding planners and banquet managers discuss table decorations.

Even as a wedding planner, you can influence every aspect

Hyperorganized and creative problem solvers who are good with people can make a living as wedding planners. Wedding planners earned an average of about $ 38,000, according to Indeed.com, but the pandemic appears to have turned their fortunes for the better. As of March 2020, wedding planners averaged $ 51,500. However, this is only the base salary. Indeed.com reports that they also tip an average of $ 100 per day. Many wedding planners come from areas such as executive assistant, event planning, and restaurant general managers.

See: Best Jobs In The Gig Economy To Make Extra Cash Or To Replace Your Full Time Job

Groomsmen at the wedding banquet

Let the magic happen from the DJ booth

No wedding is complete without music and a DJ is the logical choice for many newlyweds, as live bands cost more, take up more space, require more planning and are much more limited with their repertoire. Getting into the business used to require expensive turntables and mixing equipment, huge record collections, and real skill. Today it’s a much more accessible career or sideline – a single laptop can record every song ever written, and special software makes professional audio mixing available to the masses. You can make good money as a wedding DJ full-time or as a sideline. The average hourly wage is between $ 40 and $ 50, according to ZipRecruiter.

See: These part-time jobs will be the most popular in the US

ANTALYA, TURKEY – December 8, 2018: DJI Ronin M and Sony A7R III.

Videographers make memories forever

According to Indeed.com, videographers make an average of $ 358 a day. Not bad prey, but there is a huge spectrum in terms of costs and returns. For example, companies like Inzi Wedding Films start at $ 3,500 for cinematic documentary productions with aerial photography from drones. Regardless of the scope of your service, a background in film and video is a natural foundation for this type of work. But if you don’t have that type of experience, you can start working gigs for videography companies that hire support staff.

Modern money label: Do you still need to buy a gift for a Destination Wedding?

Beautiful wedding bouquet in the hands of the bride.

Make art out of flowers

Flowers have always been part of weddings in different cultures, countries and religions. If you have a creative flair and passion for flowers, you don’t have to open a studio or business to make a living doing weddings – unlike florists, many modern day floral designers make their homes magical. When you are good you can live well with what you love. According to Salary.com, the average flower designer makes more than $ 52,000 a year.

Remember: are cash bars a big no-no at weddings?

11972, Horizontal, No People, Walmart Best Deals, Wedding Wrap

Wedding stationery is big business

Once arrived, wedding invitations hang on fridge magnets for months before the big day – after all, they’re as beautiful as they are useful. It could be you who bring them to life – and starting your own wedding stationery business isn’t too big an investment. Whether your customers want traditional calligraphy or their style is more simple and modern, you can make a good living with this type of artistic creation. According to ZipRecruiter, the average stationery designer makes $ 25 an hour, or more than $ 52,000 a year.

Read: If Your Parents Help Pay For Your Wedding, How Much Are They Saying With Plans?

Bridal shower party decorations

Bridal shower planner

If you’re not ready to completely dive into the deep end of the pool – or you haven’t got the experience working on full weddings – consider joining one of the many supportive events that surround most weddings. This includes traditional showers. Believe it or not, a lot of people hire coordinators to plan and conduct showers. According to Salary.com, the event planners who work on such events make an average of nearly $ 52,000.

More from GOBankingRates

This article originally appeared on GOBankingRates.com: Seasonal Small Business Ideas: How to Make Money During the Wedding Season

source https://seedfinance.net/2021/06/14/how-to-make-money-during-wedding-season/